35 Burst results for "middle school"
11-year-old fatally shot in Southeast Washington, D.C.
"Our Our top top local local story story is is the the killing killing of of an an 11 11 year year old old who who dreamed dreamed of of becoming becoming a a football football star. star. He was killed while heading to a July 4th Get together. Ron McNeill was on his way to a cookout Saturday but stopped by his aunt's house along Cedar Street, right by the Frederick Douglass National Historic Site, his grandfather says as he walked toward the building. He was hit in the head by a bullet DC police say it happened just after 9:30 p.m. As a group of about five men in a black sedan began shooting up in the air before getting away through an alley. Yvonne later died at a hospital. He was a student at Kramer Middle School and hoped to one day play in the NFL man Mario Bowser says the public's help is dire in bringing to justice the perpetrators of this horrendous
21 Savage launches free online financial program for youth
"And I have talked about this a 1,000,000 times like they're you know, kids in school. We get taught all kinds of stuff, but we don't get taught some of the basic Things about Handling our money and Ah, we're going to check in account. And I mean, you might maybe in high school you have an accounting class or something. But you know these things air should be drilled into our heads. And now 21 Savage is here to save the day. While everyone's in lock down. He's announced free online financial programs for various ages of people, his foundation leading by example. And 21 Savage are launching a free online financial literally literacy education program for people who for the kid's 21 savage, 21 savages that he's a rapper or a performer, But he's the guy they were trying to get him out of the country member like I think he's British is ah. And they were trying. They were trying to force him out. He might remember this at all. But okay, maybe last summer, I think alright, going down. Yeah, I don't. I'm just like whoa, Who's this guy? And why is he OK? Good. So he's in Atlanta rapper? Ah, he's got something called bank account at home. It's his nationwide financial literacy program. It's ah, he was partnering up with the Atlanta mayor to provide free WiFi and tablets to underserved students in the city is part of this initiative, he says. I feel like it's more important than ever. To give our next generation the tools to succeed in life. The bank account of home program's website gives you financial literacy resources for a range of ages. Elementary school students learn basic concepts about money and money management. Middle school students can explore financial planning and high school students can download lessons about budgeting and entrepreneurship like it's a full on all ages program.
Rob Garnet One More Wave
"Welcome back to the coastal. Athlete. Program I'm your host. Shep today. We are joined by very special guests. We are joined by the record surf operations a US Navy veteran. Therapy advocate, a waterman, a good friend of Joe and be good friend of mine, because we're all part of the one more way, family, Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the show Rob Garnett Rob. How're you doing? Then fantastic thanks for having me am. Champ and Danny Danny met you before but SHEP. We've talked a couple of times on the phone, so it's cool to be some of the zoom. At least on Zoom. Danny is our producer, and so he's going to be helping out doing the editing and mixing the episode down and things like that Joe is going to be joining the podcast just a minute. He was transitioning from from pork. Chop actually up to his apartment. He's coming back doing some surf therapy sessions. My guess would be out of Pendleton or something like that. As usual on Wednesdays, Joe is on the road living the mission so rob. Before. We get too deep into asking you. Questions I just have to ask when it came time to transition out of your career in the military, did you? When did you know that you wanted to get into surf therapies specifically? And when did you know that like this was going to be a special moment? I. Think when I was so I retired from the navy and two thousand fifteen and so that was kind of win Wave, actually becoming nonprofit, and so I had a couple of buddies Alex and Kyle. We can talk about later. That were trying to get going. They've been doing it kind of. guerrilla-style for before getting official, and so I kind of knew about it before retiring. And then it kind of kicked off. For ME I. I was volunteering here and there with more ways. I had some other gigs so right when I retired I started doing government contracting jobs I did that for a couple years before spending a lot more time volunteering than later coming on. As employees. So, Joe I just ask some general questions. Trying to do is cut those questions and stuff at the back, so feel free to take the lead, and you have the floor sounds it sounds like you talked a bit about something about diving for the navy and then sports. Now we're talking about why I came the navy. Sorry to repeat it, but. I came in hoping to be Navy diver. I've been a commercial diver for about six months in Galveston. Texas after drop Nettie. Collagen thought that'd be a good transition and When I tried to join the navy, they said the Dow closed and that they dove at butts that I should go try that. Sounds like a good idea and so. They had me take a job. That would allow me to go to buds. became a parachute rigger, so I went to school i. By Mos got my. Parachute rigger on. And then off to buds I, not really no one else doing. My parents were hippies so military people. No one wants to be joined. The Navy so really did not get into. So I imagine was a little bit of a surprise to show to buds. Learn what that school was or. Just just the suffer faster not quite ready for nicely. I imagine imagine that's quite interesting. SUFFER FEST! I also can imagine that doing the work that you did. Know you and I kind of a little bit of your background. I've imagine that really helps. Set you up for the mission at one more wave and getting on top of things and getting things moving. You maybe talk a little bit about that. Of maybe some things you learn from the Navy that you apply now at one more. Share just. Learned a lot towards the last couple of years at Miami my time in the service. How can help people in much really from? I've been injured several times while on active duty at spent time at the. At Naiko which I know, you're not talking about for jokes. The National Intrepid Center of Excellence Traumatic Brain Injury Clinic says Maryland runs, and so I started my treatment probably. This is probably two thousand ten zero five years before I retired, and so I have a lot of time to spend time with other folks that had had you know whether it was PGA s or All the kind of things that were happening to people are not super physical, but burying paxil sleep issues, and so I got exposed to lots of different therapies, and I just knew man. This is can't wait to spend more time doing this. And, so I was really excited because I learned all these things in the navy, but how can help other people at learned a lot about the va have across his work for compensation took care people how some days are better than others. Some states are Oracle, and and what? I didn't realize. Your percentage rate affects how you get treated to I was treated well, but I'm on a different ratings on people's. It's tough so I definitely learned a lot, you know. Early on about how to help other people do this and it really as you've seen Joe out. Watch people's faces. When you get to give him some equipment whether it's a board or a boogie board or people that have had nothing. He's got a wet suit like our friends in. Santa Cruz just the amazing transformation that happens. Not only from equipment, but from the community that step we all share the Melcher that we love. Not Picking up cigarette, butts or cleaning off the flight deck, but you know going out von and be talking a little trash, each other encouraging each other and just share. That shared experiences is powerful so. Yeah I definitely can attest that shared experience than to be fair. No ship Naidoo usually pick up cigarette butts, but easily on the beach and they drive us nuts, so that's why. It's quite funny. Were you a surfer before you've got out of the military and got with one more way? Has. Started at middle, school on off and then did it alter the teens long morning. And then took several years off and then kind of into it later on, so yes. We're always at the beaches, kids. We're always bodysurfing. Trying to collect fins like my friend Joe Against. Debbie me and my fin collecting hoarding abilities. That I have for quite
Washington DC - Prince William County Votes to Rename Stonewall Schools After Black Community Members
"William Public schools After a unanimous vote last night by the school board, the Prince William's School board had already been considering a name change for both the middle and high school name for Confederate General Stonewall Jackson. I think the George Floyd Death of George Floyd in the black lives matter of discussions have accelerated these movements. Prince William's School board chair, Barber, Latif tells w e mails mornings on them all. It's important to look at intent. What was the original intent? And what is it currently doing now? What is the posture of that symbol now? Is it intimidating folks? The names will be changed to Unity, Braxton Middle School and Unity, read High school, Barbara Brit W E Mail and
Look, I Made a Hat! (Stephen Sondheim)
"Hello and welcome to misinformation Trivia podcast for ladies and Gents, and whoever who? what I lost my train of vodka. Feed Trivia Quiz Yeah like Trivia. Teams in Trivia. Listened this podcast. We are hosts I'm Lauren Julia. Yeah when you. Layered half to oh, God. We've been doing this for like almost three years now. I know it's kind of amazing. So good that we're both organized. People are else. This would not have happened for as long as. Know. Basically doing a book report every week for three years. Who knew that we loved book reports so much, so we decided to like a side hobby. So speaking of book reports actually mine is a pretty today my topic is. As Book Report he is. It's GONNA get for the most part this weekend next and my next topic the week after next I think is going to be very very like middle school. This is my. This is my report on so and so. But. Today I decided to do a little a little something different for all Lt. I've I'm expanding my my my mind and my different areas, and like going back in time to where where I was like where I wasn't high school, and what my where my interest lied, so. Today my topic is going to be on Sondheim. is to make. DIS lunch everybody La. So. Caveat. About Sante time. Your girl Lauren is recovering musical theater nerd. I cannot sing which I think. Where a lot of my resentment lies about musical theater, so I used to be super musical theater, and then I was not, and I am to this day like very uncomfortable with musicals, so I am not super familiar with Sondheim like the nitty gritty about it so I will not be. You know giving you personal stories about things, but I will say son. Heim has been involved with both one of my favorite musicals and my most hated musical, the musical I hate more than anything in the whole wide World Flint. Let's just get into it. Shall we please? Stephen Joshua Sondheim was born march twenty, second, nineteen thirty. He is still alive. He's ninety this year. Yep and we'll talk about that in a minute, but He was born into a Jewish family in new. York City the son of Janet and Herbert Sondheim. His father manufactured dresses designed by his mother. and. The composer grew up on the upper west side of Manhattan and after his parents divorced on a farm near Doylestown Pennsylvania so he was an only child of well-to-do parents, and he lived in the San. Remo on Central Park West and was described in Merrill. seacrest biography, which is called Stephen Sondheim a life. He was an isolated, emotionally neglected child. Perfect for. Perfect for musical theatre Yep he traces his interest in theater to warm for May, which was a broadway musical. He saw when he was nine quote. The curtain went up and reveal the piano. sondheim recalled a Butler to the duster and brushed it up tinkling the keys. I thought that was thrilling. He attended the New York. Military Academy and George School, which was a private quaker preparatory school in Bucks County Pennsylvania. When Sondheim was ten years old, his father already, a distant figure had left his mother for another woman. Herbert sought custody of Steven, but was unsuccessful. sondheim explained it biographer secrets that he was what they called an institutionalized child, meaning one who had no contact with any kind of family. You're in though its luxurious, you're in an environment that supplies you with everything, but human contact, no brothers and sisters, no parents, and yet plenty to eat and friends to play with and a warm bed, you know. SONDHEIM detested his mother, who is said to be psychologically abusive and projected her anger from her failed marriage onto her son. He said when my father left her. She substituted me for him and she used me the way she used him to. Come onto and berate. beat up on. You see what she did for five years is treat me like dirt, but come on to me at the same time. She wants wrote him a letter I know. She wants wrote him a letter, saying that the quote only regrets, she ever had was giving him birth.
Washington DC - Fairfax, Pr. William county schools named for Confederate generals to be renamed
"Referencing Confederate General Stonewall Jackson will be removed from two local schools in Manassas before the start of this coming school year and replaced with new names approved just last night, But the Prince William County School board, Stonewall Middle School was renamed Unity. Braxton, Middle in honor of Celestine and Carol Braxton. Celestine was a longtime county teacher. Her husband, Carroll was one of the first black men to enlist in the Marine Corps. They made it their life's mission to serve and lift others as teachers and as defenders of those who needed defending. Their efforts made the world a better place board member Jennifer Wall. Also Stonewall Jackson High School will become unity. Reid hi to recognize much loved school security assistance. Arthur Reed board member Lisa's Argha Poor. I have a feeling with Mr Reed, his memory and his character going to live on in the students of this school. Both votes were unanimous.
Emerson assistant professor fired over allegations of ‘serious misconduct', Boston
"Emerson College has ousted a faculty member for serious misconduct immersed in college reportedly fired assistant professor Jefferson fight tech after learning serious misconduct allegations against him prior to his employment at the college hi tech used to work at a middle school in Minnesota and a former student posted on Facebook recently that fi tech had sexually assaulted him when he was a teenager Amerson statement says fi tech has been referred to law
Emerson Professor Fired Over "Serious Misconduct"
"Emerson college's ousted a faculty member for serious misconduct Emerson College reportedly fired assistant professor Jefferson feed tack after learning about the serious misconduct allegations against him prior to his employment at the college VTech used to work at a middle school in Minnesota and a former student posted on Facebook recently that VTech and sexually assaulted him when he was a teenager Amerson statements as VTech has been hurt his case has been referred to law
Progressive challenger Jamaal Bowman leads incumbent Rep. Engel in New York Dem Primary
"New York is turning more progressive based on the early results we're seeing from the primaries yesterday W. CBS reporter Marla diamond as we wait for the final count progressive Jamaal Bowman a forty four year old former middle school principal is leading the seventy three year old veteran congressman by four thousand votes with just nineteen percent of the vote counted but Bowman gave what sounded like a victory speech last night so I'm excited I am happy I am five years I cannot wait to get to Congress because the problem Bowman was endorsed by Alexandria Castille Cortez who was declared the winner in the fourteenth district with seventy two percent of the vote Bronx city councilman Ritchie Torres led a crowded field to replace the retiring Jose Serrano the opportunity to represent the essential workers of this borough to represent a powerful mothers of this borough it's the culmination of a dream but we have to count every ballot mailing ballots will not be counted until
Asians have the highest incomes in the United States
"According to the US census in two thousand Seventeen Asian people at the highest median household income in this country by a lot, which is more than twice the median household income of black people. And that's what we're talking about. Here is that we have intentionally assimilated into white society. I mean we have to kind of exam kind of interrogate the fact that most Asian Americans have a white American accent. That's because we have assimilated with White Society, so let's start from the start acknowledging that we have done that. That's I think the bias that a lot of asian-americans come from is that we have surrounded ourselves with white people and have kind of neglected understanding, other minority communities namely the black community. Well Look I. The the truth is I. Didn't I never grew up around black people I think Ron. Any black people there was one black kid in my middle school and I watched him get relentlessly made fun of and I stood by didn't do anything about it and I have a lot of guilt associated with that, but like the truth is. I was I had no exposure to black people until college. My parents didn't have any black friends. It starts there. It starts with not having that experience like I. I'm not GonNa pretend that like I. Spend most of my days hanging out with black people like I, said I have a limited number of black friends now like it's not, you know luckily. I I work in food media where I get to encounter a much broader range of people than I, did growing up, but like I wanted to speak very frankly about my own experience in that is like. I just didn't have that exposure. My parents had even less of it. and. Their perspective is informed very differently from ours. And I think it's really important that we have these conversations with them, but we have to just sort of. Remember how hard it is to empathize with the group that you have no contact with. But we need everybody to see this right and this is the giant Delta between. What we need them to know and what they WANNA know, of course, look, it's interesting. Right because the three of us are maybe not. The ideal group because. We all have had ambitions to be heard we all in our own ways. We've wanted to be out there. Dave is very out there. But I don't think and tell me if I'm wrong but like. I don't think that the previous generation. Our parents have any desire to stick out. They don't want to stick their necks out there. I'm just talking about the model minority thing again. That's not that's not their parents. Generation that's Asian culture, too. Yeah. I think that's pervasive over across generations I think even now the prevailing attitude of Asian Americans, I can speak for my generation, generally speaking of an aberration like I'm very outspoken, but I'm the aberration. I'm the exception to the rule out of times and that. That kinda needs to change especially as it pertains to very important issues like this like police brutality against black people like we should be at the forefront of this, we should be allying. I was at the protests on Saturday in mid city Los. Angeles and I saw a bunch of Asian people in that gave me a lot of hope but Asian people make up about ten eleven percent of the population Los Angeles I don't think we were ten percent of the crowd that was out there marching. And we can do better. We can do better as asian-americans. Madge. If you're listening to this right and I was like this isn't a podcast. This is just a conversation. Well, yeah because I don't think there's anything you can't talk about right now. Other than what's happening I. Think it's so important that we need to have an honest conversation with my friends that I work with about how we can. Change perspectives and shift the alignment so old generation to generation to the newest generation all on the same page. Because the reason you're here and you have the civil liberties that you do have is simply because. Black. People had to go through slavery. They've had to endure the most. Awful of atrocities. Jim Crow Segregation. Now voter suppression everything is wrong and built against black people yet. Somehow people have benefited from it. And I can see a lot of Asian people being. That's not our problem. Well it is your problem because I don't think is right for you to benefit and to not have any issues right because someone else's carrying the burden.
13-year-old graduates college with 4 associate's degrees
"Futterman teenage boys celebrating his graduation in style after becoming the youngest student to ever graduate from Fullerton college in California it was set up in the front yard of Jack Rico's Holman liberate a California we're proud friends and family were cheering on his accomplishment from their car so unlike most peers age Rico was not celebrating the end of his middle school career he finished with four associates degrees last weekend at just thirteen years old he credits his success to hard work never just know everything you have to study day and night they'll next enter the university of Nevada Las Vegas to possibly study screenwriting want to go out for dinner scenes all right you wanna pick up Michael down the way you know I got to be
The Little Known History of Japanese Internment on Angel Island
"Months before the coronavirus outbreak bay curious received a question from a listener wanting to know about what happened on Angel Island during World War. Two turns out the island played a very specific role in the internment of Japanese-americans. Though very few people know much about it reporter. Cecilia lay headed to the island to learn more. It's a picturesque pre pandemic Sunday morning in San Francisco when a border fairy to Ireland under way. The last time I visited the island was during middle school field trip. They learned about the Chinese exclusion. Act Saw the poems that Chinese immigrants had carved onto the walls. But I didn't learn anything about the Japanese being held here during World War Two. So I'm on my way to meet the only expert who knows this part of the island's little known history house and me any and that's what the immigrants were classified as and also a number of the drop in on Grant Din who is teaching Angel Islands Own tour guides about the internment of Japanese residents. That happened here my name is Scranton. I'm a volunteer with the Angel and the Immigration Station Foundation. Seventy eight years ago after Pearl Harbor had broken out and president. Franklin D Roosevelt signed executive order nine. Oh six which authorized the rounding up of Japanese immigrants and Japanese Americans who were citizens into relocation camps in one thousand nine hundred eighty two Japanese residents all along the west coast were arrested because the US government suspected that many of them had allegiances to Japan and could secretly be working on their behalf. Fishermen had every opportunity to watch the movement of our ships. Japanese farmers were living close to vital aircraft plants. So as a first step all. Japanese were required to move from critical areas. Such these more than one hundred ten thousand Japanese American civilians including children hatch abandon their homes and businesses. We're taking two racetracks fairgrounds for the army. Almost overnight had build assembly center. They lived here until new. Pioneer communities could be completed on federally owned lands in the Interior. They were relocated to remote camps throughout the US surrounded by armed guards and barbed wire. They lived like this for the duration of the war. About two thirds of them. Were born right here in the US and then there was another group people the US government considered to be the biggest threat and the most dangerous. This is the group that grants researched all the people who are rounded up during this program by the Department of Justice by the FBI were Japanese immigrants and so by that means they were considered enemy aliens. Unlike the other Japanese civilian internees a majority of these quotes enemy. Aliens were men who were born in Japan. They faced interogations and were separated from their families during their internment. These men were singled out because the government had been keeping an eye on them for a while as far back as five years before Japan. Bombed Pearl Harbor even before World War. Two broke out. There were dossiers being kept on Japanese immigrants who are in this country both in Hawaii and on the mainland the FBI was watching anyone who had close ties to Japan or held prominent roles in the Japanese community. Buddhist priests language schoolteachers shopkeepers. Newspaper editors anyone who was considered a leader or expert in Japanese culture especially martial arts. I found several cases of people who are in Kendo or judo and so they went to Japan for meats and so they were often put on the list of potential saboteurs. The rounding up of these Japanese residents happened very quickly. Homes were raided without warrants. Papers were confiscated about seventeen thousand. Total Japanese immigrants were arrested and seven hundred of them were from the West Coast. Mostly from Hawaii sent here to the bay area to Angel Island.
Fashion History Now: Nurse Uniforms
"One of our most recent episode was about the history of nurse uniforms and we talked about how the nurse's cap is very specific symbolism and how the wearing of the cap really started to die out in the late seventy s moving into the eighties but we got an email that. I'd like to talk about from listener. Bath Case Bolt. Who SAYS ONO? No CAPS did not quite disappear as quickly as one thought because Beth is a registered nurse and she writes I was in the nursing program at Alderson broaddus college now university in Philippi West Virginia from nineteen eighty four to nineteen eighty eight. She says we wore navy. Blue dresses with stiff white cotton aprons complete with bibs or navy pants with a small style. Top with white pin tucked front and caller. She says the uniform double knit and they didn't necessarily change their uniform colors in the four years but what did change the color of the stripes on their caps. A and I thought that was really interesting. And she goes on to say that from nineteen ninety three to nineteen ninety-six. She says I taught an L. P. N. program at Danville Community College and Daniel Virginia and our students wore yellow dresses with white aprons. The male students were black pants with a yellow and blue shirt. They receive their caps in their second year. Instructors wore full whites including hose if you didn't wear pants. Nurses always wear white hose and the caps were required of everyone except for the male students. So you are correct. There is no alternative for men with cap so I thought that was really interesting that well into the nineteen ninety s nursing institutions of education. There were still wearing the cap requiring it to wear the cap in so many of you sent us so many fantastic images of yourself and your nursing uniforms over the years that that was really cool. I can't remember which listener in particular. But she sent us a picture of herself in the sixties with her many quote unquote mini skirt uniform. That was really need to share those with Marissa. Because we talked about that. Like how short did it get in the nineteen sixties? So thank you. We'll share those with her. Yeah and I actually asked talked to my mom too. Because my mom was a nurse in nursing school in the nineteen seventies but. She's at her school that the cap was just for pure ceremony. They had to wear it at the candle lighting ceremony when they graduated but that was it. She said we hated caps. But my mom was also a little bit of abroad burning hippie. Sorry mom very much so in response to our prom episode P- listeners. Eileen Chatterton and Jordan Brady Bolt wrote to us to tell us about the prom and homecoming tradition in Texas. Which had never heard of. Have you heard about? Oh yeah because I actually grew up in Texas when I was in middle school so it the homecoming was a huge deal even even in middle school not just high school if you have one if you didn't have one that day of homecoming you're kind of like. Oh No. I'm so embarrassed sized from people who even have more than one where and they're huge. They're like these giant clusters of flowers like of ribbons and bells and everything hanging off over them. So sometimes you maybe your parents would buy one. Sometimes your grandparents would buy you want and then maybe your boyfriend would buy one so sometimes girls were wandering around wearing like two or three of these. Jain corsage is but That was something that your your date would bring to you. Input on your wrist. Yeah but this is something you would wear all day at school. Oh interesting very
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Starts the whole argument and everybody immediately started yelling at so we were like. Why don't you let Peter to beans it? Was it's healthy snack and like I literally you practice that morning deadpan. Saying it's a healthy snack to me so naturally we all tried to say it's a healthy snack and it was pretty raw was like And I think later that day we were trying to brainstorm what you could do to get beaten So that was how we decided okay. I'll just eat beans in a tupperware and when I built the beans with the Tupperware in Class. I think I could see her lake and dial a little bit inside it was. I felt a little bit bad but not really that bad and she became a way that if teacher after this incident honestly but she's like well. I said that he could that. It's a snack if you don't need to use a tool to open it so that was how I just ate my beans in class and some still likes me. I don't really get it. But but like how did they case they were good beams and I had to like doing. The being juice and beans is filled with his executive. So it's all slimy and gross don't Nice Restored from Middle Squad. I'm so sad that we didn't get to do the last day of school beans on the desk thing. I think everybody's y'all talking about missing boondocks and whatever but what about that? Alli WHO NEEDS EIGHTH GRADE DANCE? We have beans okay so now. I have some more basic questions. Because I can't think of as many good stories besides like Kazoo period that you throw yes pursue Kazoo of guess. I still have of Mike News. But they don't sound as good as they used to. Which is very sad they degrade quickly out to. Do you have any particular memories from Middle School? That are like either really good or really know honestly Let's see I think the Peter Randy thing was like on the my highlights grade. I wasn't life told all of the stories that I remember the best..
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"SC Agai on newstalk now before embarrassment Yeah I have to Hydro Flask Yeah I think they're you but I think at the end of the day it's not worth it. 'cause they're like way too expensive for what they're worth. It's a regular water bottle. Just by the knock on him as on drew docherty wanted or something exactly like at the end of the day. I did not need to buy those and spend my Christmas money on them. Like no they were not worth it. Yeah definitely like and then I have one more question yes. Do you have any advice to the to the incoming middle schoolers especially with the current ours pandemic and just everything that's going on but also just in general like gray sets in the along the lines of try and get involved. Yes so I think definitely the biggest thing is getting involved but as we know that my clubs and stuff might change for incoming middle schoolers with this whole thing going on There might be less people loud and it might be different And I think Since I'm going into high school and I know that things probably aren't GonNa be the same as they were for high schoolers last year. It's probably going to be the same for Middle School. Things are probably going to have to change. And they're gonNA be restrictions just because that's how everything's going right now as much as I hope like it just goes back to normal. I think there's always just going to be a little bit of things that are going to change because of this So you just need to be patient with that and understand that they're doing it for reason it's first safety But yeah definitely get involved if there's a way to get involved Definitely just like I would say getting like really good friends that you can trust is one of the biggest things you just need to be able to get a friend that you can trust to tell things because honestly if you don't have someone to vent to you're not gonNA survive I definitely vented a lot to my friends and without that I feel like I would have just kept Joan side and it would have been a.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Yes so I think definitely because me and Lauren. Both got called backs for musical and being a sixth grader. That was like not expected at all but I think that's really when our friendship started growing because we started talking a lot more and especially once we got into the show. I feel like we started talking more But I feel like definitely in seventh grade is when we actually started like being really good friends because we were both inquire together. Yeah Yeah So. If you didn't know me and Lauren were part of Liberty Belles. It was fun choir With our director and a lot of our friends were in it which was really fun and in seventh grade. We were both Sopranos and we set next to each other and we just started talking a lot more. I'm not exactly sure why we started talking. But I believe it's because one of your friends is Kenner not really being a jerk or my other friends so yod i. I just feel bad for you and I'm like oh I should probably talk to her and but then I'm just like Oh my God. We have so much more than I thought we did. Yeah I think one thing that helped us Was up next to each other in writing class and then my other friends ditched me in sixth grade. Said I need let me your table. Yeah definitely the rest decision ever a yes. Little things that led up to an awesome. Friendship Right is really fun. And then what we're saying you're worse Middle School memories so just terrible middle school. So I'd say I had some tough times obviously during this great production when some people are being really rude annoying a sixth grader getting lead. That was definitely tough but overall I got through it and then some got even harder when I had a big spat with a friend of mine and that was really hard because yours. Everyone say middle schools really the time where..
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Fm to get started again anchored get started now next up. We talked to theater Geek Abby. Who Discusses All the different ways that theatre has impacted her life both positively and negatively? And how actually? That wasn't the path that she thought she would take alot. Abby GonNa work this time. Let's hope so. All right you ready to talk about the best and worst Middle School Memories. I am ready all right. Begin with whatever interesting story and like this is for all three years so if you have anything interesting from sixth grade go ahead okay so I definitely say. Overall middle school experience was very good because it definitely helped me find myself and one of my biggest now is musical theater and I would never be entrusted not without middle school because in sixth grade. I tried out for the middle school musical and totally wasn't expecting to like it or anything and I ended up getting the lead which was crazy because sixth graders usually. Don't get that I know without that experience. I just I wouldn't be as interested in it as I am now. That's true so I think that those things definitely I would agree like I was interested in it but I wasn't some Abbas super excited about now I really really love it. Yeah I totally agree. I mean I really wasn't interested in all before Middle School which was really weird because my parents were super surprised when I signed up for theater as like an elective. They're like what the heck because I I've always been kind of like shot by and like not really wanted to be up in stage in front of people so I think they like didn't expect me to like it or anything and then you know try out for the play was not how to super small role. And then I'm I liked it and I thought okay would be fun to just do this again. Just get to know how this works and so I did. The musical and I definitely was not a small part again so that was definitely a weird experience going from literally three words to tons and tons of lions. Yeah I mean was like overall. That was a good experience. The weren't there some struggles with it to Ya. I mean definitely being a sixth grader. Who definitely didn't expect to get it. There were eighth graders. Who for sure did not want me to have and there is definitely people who were nasty about it and rude and but at.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Gosh I choir was just awesome. I agree I think I actually mentioned earlier. I was talking about my favorite Middle School Memories and experiences end. I said we're both seventh and Eighth. Grade was definitely allstate. Allstate was so fun. That was the most great this year so many more people were literally all girls. Yeah all we all hung out together and it was so great. It was a really good. I'M NOT GONNA lie and we cannot forget Gerald needs. We really do we really do. Okay so is our king. I'm Aska Mascot. He's the choir mascot put so he is. You know those like little little boxes. He's like a stuffed animal of those guys like muster looking things. Yeah Yeah Yeah. He's a stuffed animal. Yeah in Hughes incredible. We have photo shoots with him all the time Abby Johnson and so they let Lucky Daca but for a while she would bring him to school after all sedan. It wasn't until someone took him. That was that was a Stole and we dined all we may. We may missing posters. Yeah Gerald Yeah so yeah the Kate who took them had like the odd Odyssey like after seeing one of the posters like right on the Whiteboard Mike. I found him. What do we do now get? You wasn't a reward like no you stolen. Yeah you stole Gerald. Don't get a reward. Yeah Yeah Oh yeah. Allstate was so fun. Last year was up was ARI started throwing up. Oh God that was scary. Yeah the WHO called the virus because of the time we were all joking about the coronavirus willing New Well we're joking. Oh our like never mind really crap to do that but yeah choir allstate were some really good experience. Yeah we we have group chats from a the group chat and then speaking of Choir recently the award given that L. Vocalists and congratulations grace. You wind thank you so exciting. It's kind of funny So he posted. It was like wait. This there's a whole speech You posted it on the Website Ryan I go. It's the notification came down and I was like. Oh my God. It's I started reading the speech. I had my family like pause the TV show. We were watching and I'm like reading through it and then me text issues like congrats and I'm like.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Yes all right. Let's begin with the first question for okay all right. So what do you enjoy most about your middle school experience? Oh Wow okay so on.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"I will good enough. Sorry I need to cough again. So my favorite memories from Middle School in Sixth Grade I really did like screwed overall. That was a good year There were definitely some ups and downs. But I think one of my favorite things that happened was getting involved in feeder This was the first time I add. I mean I don show in the pathogen anti junior once but I just play Mrs Pew. It wasn't anything super interesting but I took theatre arts. This year was the only. You're actually class instead of like getting involved in the club but I did both but I got involved with the class and I had the best teacher ever. I mean her name is Miss. Murray and I love her. I love her lover lover. She is so so fun end. She's a great teacher. I learned a ton and that cautious my favorite. I mean I think one of the only reasons I mean. That class was also super easy but one reason that. I always think I got an A. alike very consistently as I'm not really afraid to yell so basically everybody in that class. I was always given the yelling roles like a short little script and I enjoyed it. I'M NOT GONNA lie. I'm surprised I didn't lose my voice because I was really loud. I don't think I'd be that loud anymore but I would yell and I mean one of the things that we did once is. We played a game because we played like theater games. All the time machine ended up. Actually I did. My Birthday Party was themed feeder and we play a whole bunch of theater games but one of my like was Minute about getting somebody off the bench. So basically everybody's coming order you had to. Somebody was on the bench. And then you had the comic character on your own and basically Improv and try and get him off the bench without touching them. Like being kind of you could say oh. Did you hear that Peyton? Manning has a sale right over there and then you know if the guys like a football player who wish football over. I don't know I said Laker. If we like football or Peyton manning go see go to peyton manning store at the sale or whatever but you have to watch the person in front of you because the way that they get you off. The bench is the way that Basically an experts. If the person who's you're going to be trying to get off the bench she will have just washed. Got Somebody off the bench. Kind of weird. I don't know if that was perfect explaining but oh well so eventually I got up there. I decided I wanted to say something really awkward and make everybody uncomfortable because I like doing that in real life and I'm pretty good at it so basically basically it like breaking the social norm and so naturally I was like I'm just GonNa talk about puberty and make everybody uncomfortable and being in sixth grade. Everybody did not want to talk about puberty because we just recently had the talk and everybody was like no no. We're talking about Uber. So basically it was super awkward and so I got up there and I said something along the lines of hey do you..
Pastor Ken Fong on His Daughter's Evolving Relationship to Christianity
"Wife and I when we adopted our daughter even before we became parents. We had made it. I think mental decision to not be tiger parents and more specifically when it came to religion that although we have a preference Both of us were raised as Christians. Well my wife doesn't come rechristened family. But she was going to church ever since she was a young kid We definitely WANNA raise our children that way but with the understanding that they had to kind of come to make a decision themselves at some point In order for it to have any meaning. And when you you know understand things that way you understand that your children as they grow older aren't always going to make decisions like you hope they will so our daughter now is twenty one and she's home studying online because of this shelter in place order so we're having some unexpected family time like every day that normally having a junior in college you sitting out of state you wouldn't have so we actually were talking last night over dinner and we were sharing with her some updates about kind of what. I was talking about and last week introduction Waiting to Kinda here the decision from the board of my previous church where I retired Whether starting this coming July with a review okay for me to return to the church or nut and Our daughter just blurted something out and she said well. I think this is a good time to share with you. That this whole thing with the Church Has already kind of really messed with my understanding of what is what things should be like and I guess I grew up thinking that church was a place of no politics and quickly corrector wherever. They're people guys of what they claim to be. There's always politics but does not have to be nasty but you know she just said well you know it's it's really soured me so e even if they say he can go back I'm pretty sure I'm not going back and not sure on that interested in going to any church right now. In fact I'm I'm kind of thinking more like an atheist. Now What's interesting is that You know she chose to go to a Christian liberal arts school and it's not like Bob Jones University or Liberty University with Jerry Falwell JR senior. It's a it's a pretty. I think moderately progressive school and yet. She has so many friends who she's met there. Who are atheists agnostics? And you know I. That kind of really surprised me. Like why would atheist or agnostic. Choose to go to a Christian College in. She was explained to me that well. You know maybe the This particular school has a program and some majors that are highly regarded. And so you know you go and you just kind of turn off to out all the Christian stuff you don't go to chapel. What have you and Most of our daughters closest friends are in that camp. Our daughter did say that she She still has an affinity to some of the essentials of the Christian faith. But she's really trying to figure things out you know if this is really her faith talk about the chickens coming home to roost for years and years. I did workshops on the development of of people's faith and just like our physical buildings develop over time like if you threw a fastball at three year old and an expected here she'd have the physical coordination to catch it. That would be cruel and unusual. It'd be child abuse. If on the other hand you know the person is thirty. Years old and you throw a fastball. They should have some capacity to catch the ball. They have developed physically and the same kind of thing goes with like intellectual capacity unless some kid is a genius. You know you don't bother teaching them higher math or world geography. You know when their third graders but or even philosophy but you know when they get older that there's more of a not just a curiosity I think there's a there's a building of the brain to actually manage more complex thinking and I found over the years that the same is true for how spirituality and so Lattanzio taught you know there's four identifiable stages of our fake develops the first ages. Imitative so this is where you know. Let's say you're born into this family and it's a Christian family and you could be religion right Guy Christian family and so without knowing what it's all about without exploring it for yourself because you're little you just imitate but rebels is doing and especially when you're a baby. I mean they just put you in the armed put in the stroller and they take it to church or temple. Or what have you and you see? People Bother head so you buy your head. See PEOPLE CLASS THEIR HANDS? Either you see them do the incense. Whatever happens in that particular religion and that doesn't make it fake for that person. It makes age appropriate to be imitating you get to a stage Maybe in later. Elementary School no Middle School. Where it's adoptive and so now there's enough capacity to think to consider so you now can choose if you will to adopt the beliefs and practices that you were initially in imitating now a lot of people a lot of us if we go on these kind of spiritual journeys we kind of stalled out either. Stage one imitative or stage two adoptive and so some people. Just just keep going through the motions imitating everything. That's going around them imitating the beliefs. The stated positions. What have you without giving it much? Second thought or they just get stuck in adoptive and so they're choosing this but they've never kind of thought about what else they might choose and this leads to the third stage of spirit veldman which again paralyzed parallels Brain capacity because usually around young adult time is when the brain is most able to deal with deep Complex sort of issues and this is called Searching individual so this is when the I think you know perfectly describes were daughters at offset your questioning things that you dated without question and you adopted pretty readily but now you're saying well. That was my parents that came from my church that came from whatever my peer group but Now I'm really wondering like what do what do I believe and It's it can be very lonely time. I mean no one else can go on this journey of a real searching and I think it's scary enough that some people put their toe in that uncharted water and they run right back to adoptive. Or Imitative and this could even be pastors and priests right and and leaders And I think it really shows over time if someone who's even in a leadership position in a religious capacity has not gone on this journey because their beliefs are pretty shallow. They haven't really come to own it which then leads into the last fourth stage which is owned faith gay and It doesn't necessarily mean that when you if and when you get through the third phase of searching that you're going to land back into faith that you originally started with you did start with one you. May You may. But you may find that. You're much more enamored of. Let's Jesus then the church you see now the church will all of its Hypocrisies and and so. You're much more focused on the person in the teaching of Christ or the Buddha. You know if you will Or You come through on the other side and you're you're just a straight up atheist or agnostic or you're going to try something else altogether so what what so. I definitely commend our daughter for being so forthcoming with us. And you know a lot of ways This is how we raised our daughters so that she has this space and this personal capacity to ask the hard questions of us and her faith and everything else you know. It's too soon to predict where if anywhere she's GonNa land but I just have to say that on this Memorial Day in twenty twenty. It's just fascinating to me that something a theory of development that I've taught for years and years and years is now coming home to roost. It's it's we've got our own living breathing. Human young adult who is is wrestling with these. And I'll tell you it is. It is scary when as a parent you still. Even though I've gone through my journey and I've owned in think my wife has to you still realize that part of the authenticity in the validity of believing these stages especially the third stage is truly give this person in this case your our child the freedom and the affirmation that she needs in order to do this without thinking. She's disappointing us. You Know I. I can't imagine how that must feel for someone who's Pastor's kid to right. It's not just having Christian parents. But you know retired pastor so that's just interesting update on life. I think parents who don't understand and others imposters who don't understand kind of how this development works. They see the phase at our young adult daughters in as running away like as discarding disbanding. And I think that's a mistake and clearly what she share with us. She's really wrestling with with some of the things that are still holding onto her but she wants to make it hearse and you know as her dad and pressure. My wife would agree if that's her goal is to land somewhere or she's not just going through the motions where she's not just mouthing things that she's been raised hearing all the time that's worth that's worth the struggle and we're going to walk with their way with her.
Diving Deep with Melissa Joan Hart
"I would love to just kind of start off talking about. I mean you've kind of been in the limelight for most of your life. Now you've been behind a screen and I'd love to hear Maybe how that has affected you. Would you let your boys do acting if they wanted to get into it? Just kind of love to hear your story a little bit. You know the thing is. I didn't know any other childhood right. My childhood was I had a fairly normal childhood where I grew up with my parents siblings on a Dead End Street Long Island walking to school every morning riding my bike valet classes. Because my parents couldn't take me because were too many children in our house. and But I also auditioned ended. Theater ended commercials and stuff like that so I think it was a little bit short of the way anybody else would take take a hobby seriously if somebody was a major soccer player at school and doing really well with that or if someone was gymnast and be being pulled out of school at the time for certain events started Nowadays everyone does travel. I don't travel was a big thing when I was growing up. But like you know missing. School for work was kind of odd but it was what I knew and everyone else had a lot of questions about it and I got very embarrassed about that kind of thing but Yeah but time I was like thirteen I was on Clarisa or maybe fourteen but not a lot of people had cable so my my kind of well growing up I was known as the rice krispies girl I was known as the Arnold Bright Girl like all these commercials I would do. Or if someone's parents let them watch me on the equalizer or they happened to see me on Saturday night. Live or I let a bunch of girlfriends come see me play ones but most of the time when I was doing a lot of theatre in my early middle school days nobody knew I was doing big FYODOR. Nobody they just knew I was going out at night. They had no idea at I was I was doing. You know a big play with big names and all this other stuff so And then Clarisa happened and while I was on a TV show filming in Orlando. I wasn't in Hollywood. I wasn't going to Red Carpet. Wasn't part of the whole scene circuit and then the show is on cable wasn't like a lot of people had it until later so really that's show became popular very slowly. Nickelodeon knew that there was good numbers behind it but as far as being recognized on the street it happened and I was living in New York City where nobody looks at your face anyway. Often keeps going. You know once in a while I would get stopped on the street in my teen years and I'd be kind of like flabbergasted by it and annoyed by it was weird. I don't know them but they're pretending they know me you know and and then Sabrina happened. We moved to La. I was twenty you know and I was a little more prepared and ready for it and so you know I feel like in a sense. I had a pretty normal childhood. Really until ninth grade and then ninth grade but you know teen years or was weird anyway kind of happy to get out of the high school setting away from peer pressure. I had a few friends but didn't really have group and felt like feel like I belonged which I think a lot of middle schools do so when I was around adults and working I felt very safe. I felt very accepted as long as I was. Nice to everyone It didn't matter what I wore. What music I liked who I dated. None of the adults care about that. Yeah so I learned very quickly that like L. Like how middle schoolers. They're mean to me because I were the wrong shoes with my outfit or desma. Mahir read for a play or something you know. And I'm like you know these adults are just like just be dumping ass right like as long as I was nice and I think that's sort of why I learned very early to like on a sat like you. You WanNa be professionally one. Do Your job you Wanna hit your mark in. It doesn't matter if you're the star or not like everyone has to behave themselves in a certain way. You don't get to be a diva because your names the one on the idol in your face. The one they're using to promote it like doesn't am. I get you a few things but I like to whenever I use sort of diva behavior. It's only to benefit everybody
Curtis Sittenfeld's New Novel Brings Her From Prep to Politics
"I guess. Today is the author of the Sunday Times Bestseller American wife in which she painted a picture of an ordinary American girl a thinly disguised Laura Bush who found herself married to a president. It was long listed for the Orange Prize. As was her debut novel. Prep her other books. Include the man of my dreams sustained eligible and the acclaimed short story collection. You think it I'll say it. Her stories of appeared in the New Yorker Esquire Oprah magazine and The New York Times magazine her latest collection of stories to be published in the UK is help yourself. She's also the guest editor for the Twenty Twenty Best American short stories anthology. She lives with her family in the American Midwest. A brand new novel is rotten. And it's been described as bombshell while I couldn't agree more. This is a book that will demand. Attention Curtis Sitton fell. Welcome to meet the rices. Thank you for having me. You'll novel begins in one thousand nine hundred thousand nine. Is Hillary Rodham Graduates College? And it brings us right up-to-date in Contemporary America. But I'd like to go back to Cincinnati in one thousand nine hundred seventy five when when you were can you tell us about the second stance surrounding you alive? Oh my goodness it's funny. I'm so much in the habit of of talking about Hillary's lay right now. You'll warm familiar with that than with my own will. I'm the second of four children. I have a sister. Who's less than two years older than I am. And I would say a have not led a very personally dramatic life which might be why I'm a fiction writer instead of a memoir rest but yeah I grew up in Cincinnati. My parents are both retired but still live in Cincinnati and I have two sisters one brother my brother is actually holds elected office in Cincinnati. He's the he's a member of the city council in his third term. So so I guess. Different members of my family are interested in in politics in in different ways but I was very lucky to go to excellent schools in Cincinnati elsewhere. And I would say my family Sort of obsessive readers like we didn't it's not like we. All six sat around each of US feverishly reading a book of our own but there were lots of books in the House. We did sometimes read is a family. My mother was a librarian for a long time for you know middle school or junior high students so ages twelve and thirteen and fourteen and that strong feminist streak. That comes to your writing that being influenced by her. That's an interesting question. My parents have almost opposite personalities. From each other where. My father is very great Gary in very opinionated and my mother is you know I think she has strong opinions and viewpoints. But she's. She's not a very assertive per cent. And she's not she's not she's a very private person even even by saying this should not be. I think she'd rather that like I never talk about her. Other than you know maybe acknowledging that she exists described as relatively progressive. But you know I think there are some families where the children grow up going to protest rallies in that was not my family You'll schooling was obviously a hugely influential. In fact your first book prep which is I. Think long list for the Orange Prize loosely based on that. Would you say so? I went to a boarding school in Massachusetts. When I was I had just turned fourteen and it was sort of strange given you know the area of the country where I grew up. Which is the mid west and it was a little bit unusual to go to a sort of fancier elite boarding school on the east coast just in the sense that a lot of students who go to that school are more from that region and also the other thing is that. I was the only one of my siblings who went which I think sometimes makes people think that I must have been the most academically talented in fact. I was the least academically and by my siblings. Were all you know much more. Well rounded students like. I did well in English but I definitely struggled with other subjects so those a little bit. I feel like I certainly. It was privileged but it was also a little bit random or arbitrary that I went to boarding school and talking about coming from a different at least geographical background from the rest of the students. The story is sort of more than coming of age. It's it's more perhaps one could say it was about a study of of social class. Was that something that you found was very apparent there that it did feel different. This whole kind of I mean I think the thing that we all have this horror of being a teenager comes across in dairy well a particular field and that you didn't fit in that. I think I felt at times that I didn't fit in. Certainly I mean I would say that. It wasn't the main character in prep. Leave your experiences going to boarding school as more of a sort of class shock than I would say I did. And you know class is sort of the air. We all breathe. It's maybe especially obvious. Una Boarding School campus. But you know I think it's it's obvious everywhere you know. You can have a sort of exchange with a person like delivering a package to your house and the two of you could probably like assess each other's voices are accents and no things about each other's class or like defied that one of you is in a house receiving a package one of US delivering. The package also says things about class in our society. You know doesn't necessarily say very good things but I think the To like one yet like I was aware of class. And I don't think I was quite as much of a fish out of water as my protagonist. Although certainly I'm like erotic person was even more neurotic as a teenage you write about teenagehood again in in your next book. And I think we'll come back to that because it will say impacts on on the subject matter of Rodham but you went off to Stanford then and you studied creative writing night. You wrote the College newspaper. You registered magazine. What's being a writer? Always the the obvious career choice. Well I think writing was always really important to me and it was like from a very young age for about six or seven. I spent a lot of time reading and writing because I wanted to. I think it helped me make sense of the world and it held my attention and there weren't as many options on net. Netflix back. Then so entertain yourself a little more so definitely writing always played a huge role in my life. I don't think I grew up with the expectation that I would be a full time novelist. I think sometimes I thought I won't be a lawyer or as I got older. I thought you know maybe a social worker or an English teacher or something. I always the closer my adulthood. I think the more it seems like I would do something writing adjacent. But I just don't think anyone can count on being a fulltime writer as you know how they pay their mortgage and I mean going to someone as you did to study at the Iowa. Writer's workshop is no guarantee of coming out. The other end is a fully-fledged writer. But that does give you a better chance than most doesn't it's a huge success rate. It's a it's a wonderful program and I like I loved being there. I learned a ton but the the thing that people don't necessarily realize is not only. Can you go to an excellent writing program the Iraqis and after that you know not have a stable writing career you can be a writer who has had multiple books published in that. Still not the way. You're supporting yourself. And in fact new writing is my full time job. But that's that's an incredible privilege and it's not. It's not something I take for granted. It's very I know that it's very unusual on special. I feel
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"I deserved the role so they can say whatever they wanted but you know it was just. I had an awesome time and it was a great experience and in really happy that I did that. Yes that's definitely US awesome. Yeah I'm so happy especially like now that we're in eighth grade. The show got cancelled. It's definitely good to have had experience along those lines. Yeah because I had always said. Oh great well. I got the lead in sixth grade. There's no am getting a lead in eighth grade and you know what it doesn't even matter anymore because one we're not doing a musical which is really sad because I feel like that would have been fun Even though I had a small part not it's always just the theater family. That's always just so fun to be a part of and And I ended up getting a lead in the last eighth grade. Play to which was really fun. Relevant when Durrell so yeah which was really funny because Lauren was my evil stepsister so it was kind of funny because we're obviously really good friends and it was so weird. Having to like hate each other jettas drew those funny yeah. Was there any particular thing in like seventh grade? That was like a really good just memory like when I was talking about it. I said how definitely I think. Our friendship grew seven career. The most NFL much happier during that year becoming front few. Yeah I think definitely sixth and seventh grade. Were like the best years of Middle School for me. Eighth Graders Kinda stressful but yeah. I do feel like our friendship kind of group from that. I feel like the first time we started to kind of become friends was actually like call backs of the sixth grade musical. Yeah so I think definitely because me and Lauren both got called backs for the musical and being a sixth grader. That was not expected at all but I think that's really where our friendship started growing because we just started talking a lot more and especially once we got into the show. I feel like we started talking more But I feel like definitely in seventh grade is when we actually started like being really good friends because we are both inquired together. Yeah Yeah So. If you didn't know me and Lauren were part of Liberty Belles. It was a fun choir. with our director and a lot of our friends in it which was really fun and in seventh grade. We were both Sopranos and we sit next to each other and we just started talking a lot more. I'm not exactly sure why we started talking but I believe it's because one of your friends is Cana not really new jerk from my other friends so Yod I I just feel bad for you and I'm like oh I should probably talk to her and but then I'm just like Oh my God. We have so much more common than I thought we did. Yeah I think one thing that helped us. was sat next to each other in writing class and then my other friends ditched me in six grade. Said I need like music your table. Yeah definitely the rest decision ever a yes. Little things that led up to an awesome. Friendship Right is really fun. And then what we're saying your worst Middle School memories terrible middle school. So I'd say I had some tough times. Obviously this is great production when some people are being really rude and annoying about a sixth grader. Getting lead that was definitely tough but overall I got through it and then some guard even harder when I had a big spat with a friend of mine and that was really hard because yours. Your everyone say middle schools really time. Where Fredericks get tested? And you see her. True friends are and I'm like that's probably not really true. People probably just say that and then I'm like Oh crap I am going through that right now so That was definitely tough. Cause just you know mean things are said and you really take them to heart even though you don't think about the fact that we're all just middle schoolers and we're all going through a tough time and sometimes people say things they don't mean and it's it's annoying but you have to go through. I think to come out on the other end and then eighth grade I'm now friends with that person which is really awesome that we got through that and we were able to work that out. It's obviously never gonNA be the same as it was but it's awesome that were not in a Fi and going through that. I think one of the things you need to learn to do is just learn to let things go because otherwise you're just going to hold on to it for the rest of your life and it's going to be not fun at all Pam in the eighth grade was probably one of my hardest ears. I just feel like everything was way different than it was in seventh grade. I mean you're having to think about so many more things you you have to start thinking about highschool and it's just weird because a lot of your friends that you like hung out before for some reason. I have no clue why. But they just start to go into other friend groups and really certain clicks start to like really be established which I have no clue why that happens eighth grade but I mean I saw it happening. Yeah like I definitely started to fall into that choir in teeter thing Where it's like I some of the people who were in the popular groups. I would hang out in seventh grade. Would not talk to me anymore. Because they knew I was really in that Cedar Group and I was like okay. Why does this matter? But at the end of the day people are going to be like that and you just have to accept it on. Yeah I just feel like overall the workload was way harder in eighth grade than you expected and it was just like a lot of stress. Yeah I would agree especially since we're doing this virtual learning thing. That was so hard for me because I mean we're done with that now. Thank goodness but that was so hard because you have to learn how to manage all your own work. Which as usually you don't have to do all that tell you get a job Yeah and so when you're an eighth grader. And you just basically don't want to do that and you just WanNa go have fun It's hard to be like okay. I have to get this done today but you know at the end of the day. I feel like a kind of helps with the fact that we couldn't see any of our friends all the fun places that we would normally go to were not open so we were kind of forced to But I this corona virus thing is just. It's I think when the hardest challenges that I've had to go through middle school because everything that you thought you hated or you didn't WanNa go to and now you can't go to them or see the people that you didn't like thank you loved that much When you can't do all those things like oh my gosh I will never say I don't want to do those things you can ever. Yeah you realize that you were taking advantage of so many things right so now. Let's talk about some of your favorite and least favorite classes throughout the years. Okay so I think it is kind of established. I am quite the theater kid so I think choir in theater definitely my favorite classes. But I mean you're electives are usually your favorite classes. 'cause you choose them Otherwise core classes I definitely didn't like math. I think it was mostly the teacher. But didn't really like math. This year was released struggling. Also I think just the fact of going from just my advanced math class year to algebra. One was like okay. This is way different. Like what the heck is going on here I think it's weird because I loved writing pretty much every year until this year again I think is probably a teacher thing or just the fact that it changed a lot but I think reading has been constantly one of my favorite classes. 'cause I have actually had the same teacher for reading two years in a row because he just happened to move up To eighth grade when I was moving from seventh eighth grade so awesome. And he's just such a great teacher. I've learned so much from him and then even everybody likes Mr Nastya. Agra LOVES MR NASKI He's just he's hilarious and funny and he can make everyone have fun but at the same time. He takes things series enough where we're learning so much. Yeah Yeah And even in sixth grade I. I really liked my reading teacher. Then and me and Lauren were in the same class then too so miss boynton back when she liked her. Yeah she just got kinda salty recent So speaking of teachers is there any specific person event class activity? That influenced like your future plans kind of like you were saying when you join like really change your personality in everything. Yeah so I think definitely one of the people who definitely put me on. That path was my sixth grade Theater Teacher Myth Murray and she actually left to go start her own theatre business. So it's kind of funny. We've had a different theater teacher every single year. Which I think is actually an awesome opportunity to have because you learn different styles and preferences of theater that be as directors have so. I think it was definitely important. So I had Miss Murray Mr Segel and miss jaws this year And I feel like I definitely learned a lot from each of them but ms Murray was the first one who definitely put me on that path. She was the one who asked me to audition for the musical. She's like I think it'd be really fun and your fun to having class so I think maybe this'll be fun for you to do so Definitely without her probably would not be doing this at all. Wants me to younger. She was honestly. My favorite theater teacher probably just biased. Because I had her from the beginning But and then probably another teacher along the musical theater line was Mr Rao Your teacher Because he also asked me to join the sixth grade musical so just having both those teachers tell me too. I think really convinced me. I feel like just one of them told me I would probably be like. Oh Yeah. Will you have to do that but when two teachers tell you? You're like have to do this. Yeah so yon. He's just been so awesome through the three years that I've been in his class because Actually I was in orchestra my sixth grade year And I just after being that. I production At Liberty I was like okay. I definitely want to do Cedar and try to do more of it. And unlike I'M NOT GONNA get there without being in choir so I dropped out of orchestra to go to choir and definitely my first impression of him was a little bit weird because if you don't know him his personality is kind of crazy and if you don't know that he's totally joking around you could take him too seriously and be hurt. So the first day of choir he came up to me and he's like okay so you think you can just come a week late to choir. Han and like I was just I just I just joined. I'm sorry it like totally. Take Him Serious. Being SCARED. Little sixth grader And he just took my bag any through it across the hall and I was like for writing out of my mind and then I've ruined started laughing and I'm like okay. They're like you know he's joking right. And unlike no so I was pretty scared after that but after you know a week or two. I was like okay. This is like one of the best teachers I've ever had 'cause he just he has so much knowledge and it's just so amazing to have acquired teacher that that.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"Right. Let's begin with the first question for okay all right. So what do you enjoy most about your middle school experience? Oh Wow okay so on the on the bus. It's kind of Weird. But the on the bus we would always have like the sing alongs very. Yeah Yeah and so. I don't know I just always really love. But yeah was just a small thing but yeah. The kids are bus. Would play good music. Sometimes that music was good music and sing along. Yeah around Christmas time. We'd sing like Christmas songs. In all this kind of thing it was really nice. That was the fun that was one of the fun things but the bustling restaurants Of course I love my friends Is there like a couple of memories or any stories you want to share like from your best Middle School Memories might not? There's a lot on the arts festival this year. That was really nice. Yeah so explained the listeners. What was the festival this year? Why was fun okay? So the Arts Festival is dad. Hold on arts festival sorry. My Dad land the earliest. All is pretty much like this event. Our school does wear. They put up artwork and photography work from students all across the hallways en- end orchestra. The band The choir which is what Lauren in Iran. A perform and theater to this year That was really fine just because afterwards we kinda ran around send it. Yeah but we got to perform our own songs for everyone. Lord did amazing. Thank you thank you. I'll tell them what you say is saying someone you loved by Luik. Paul the You say his name Edgy Killed. It thank you. Yeah and then Lauren. Did she used to be mine? And it was be careful. She played the piano Sound credible right and then our choir. Our tire choir sing some. Yeah Gosh.
"middle school" Discussed on QuaranTEEN
"And then they put me in C. P. Physical Science and I mean it was a very boring class in the beginning. I was like I'm not doing this anymore. Kind of thing and so I basically just pushed my way up and I complained until they put me in Honors Chemistry and there was actually no reason for me to be in there. Didn't have any test. Scores approved I`ma genius or something in science. But I'm so glad that I did that because that's GonNa put me ahead in science for Middle School And asking to go to college. Applications like everything actually is going to make a difference in the end especially with math and science so if you can push away push ahead of other people do it take the opportunity because although it might be stressful and there's going to be some bad things about it like people aren't GonNa like you. That's okay I mean that's on them. You're going to be likable no matter what. And then other thing everybody is going to be Self conscious about their bodies like it's true I didn't think hobbies GonNa ever go through phases where I was like. I hate the way I look hate. Everything I did and I mean I'm still out at that. Stage is still not perfect and I go is when I look in the mirror. I don't like what I see my reflection but there's other times. I think that I look pretty and I like Daffy just it does seem like it's GonNa last forever but it is than just a phase if it's not the do get help sometimes. You need to have a therapist that works best for people so just recognize if you need any help and just reach out to people who are closest to you and then also the last thing I'd say is do work hard. Yes this isn't going to go on college application of yours but like there's no reason to throw it away either like yeah. It's not you don't need to get all as you don't need to just be in all the advanced classes but I would highly recommend it because it's going to put you in advantage in high school. If you already know how to work hard you don't want to show off your brain. Her three years of middle school and then get to high school and go crap. This matters now I need to. I need to step it up. I need to start working. Because that means that you didn't do it before and you're not gonNA know how to do it now and so just come up with a system that works for you and my final thing is taking notes and listening to what your future to do so for me. My teachers always wanted to use a binder. I hate binders GONNA lie. So the only system of organization that really worked for me has been this year and last year but six grade. I did not know what I was doing so I think I have this folder. That has eight different homework folders in it so basically it just operates is like any normal homework folder and I have eight eight periods in a day slight assist each one for a class and so I basically would put instead of using a binder. I would put all of my stuff in the former colder and that worked for me but then when I was taking notes that I use what's called a rocket book so it's basically just a journal that you have to. You can write in and then scan. It gained nuts to your phone. Would like you will drive or wherever you store stuff and then afterwards after you do that Your notes will be there permanently. And that's and you can raise the Patriots like meeting Han US race. Bullpens in the news like a wipe. Wipe him down and it works perfectly. That was a good system but then eighth grade. I think I transitioned little out of that. And then for both high clauses. The decided to do what they actually wanted. So I did a binder for both classes of Individual binder fridge. I think that was a good a good thing for me but it was a little annoyed carry binder everyday so I definitely think that you have just figure out what works for you because this is your time to experiment before you can go to high school so learn what works for you before you start panicking high school and that's about what I would say so now we're going to quickly jump transition from me to you talking to analysts. I we talked analysts. He discusses the importance and appreciation of school. And don't take anything for granted because clearly that didn't really work out the storm please. Welcome analyst all righty. So let's begin so star whenever you're ready okay. So I actually liked eighth grade more than both seventh and sixth grade. I found it less stressful. For whatever reason and I liked a lot of my teachers and my favorite class was probably photography 'cause I thought it was cool to be able to be outside and taking pictures. And then editing them and stuff and I regret How it ended the how the coronavirus interrupted. 'cause we didn't get to do our Art Project that was painting. That was kind of sad but.
Wheres the stop button??
"I'm Steven Seagraves. Joined by Seth Miller and foss mood. Hey guys hey so. It's a lovely Tuesday afternoon. We're recording this earlier than normal. Actually know what day of the week it is. I keep track an end. You know we have to record the show earlier. Because Seth is turning into a GRANDPA and Sunday starting to starting to do woodworking and go to bed early trump would it becomes a teacher just random side story about shop teachers I actually didn't get take shop class in high school. We sort of had one. But I I did a drafting course. Instead which turned out to be very valuable and useful to me later in life and so I'm happy I did it We I was like the last year they did paper drafting with the square and know the arm moving around and doing all by answers really cool on and then learned cad later but separate from that My wife was telling a story last night as we were talking about some of these things and I bought more tools or power tools on having the crap turns out matters a lot but she's timing the story about how she did something in shop class when she was like in middle school and hers wasn't very good but her sister who's a year younger than her came back and it was really good in much straighter lines and this and that and I'm like oh she probably is that the right the right the fence and had it all working correctly. I don't think we had that was like how could you do that? You use a table. Solid data blade without a French. So now you just held it carefully. This that's Super Dangerous. Did have missing finger cystic wait. Why get another kids ever lost fingers in Class? And maybe maybe the shop teacher lost in a different way. I don't know but just from a visual perspective in the image. You're trying to project. I don't see how that's a good idea. Not One of my which teachers told us to tell us how he'd come in on weekends with dead dear to cut them up on the we're GonNa be completely topic here for the first couple of is a friend of mine who lives in the catskills apparently China some stories about their neighbor once the stupid APP Arnold next next next door next door chats or this or that in something. Apparently someone hit a deer inside. Hey you know. Put a message on the side of the road around here. Be careful driving over there and one of the responses was like you just left it there. You didn't do anything else. Which okay fine notified the authorities like you have to tell us family? Apparently like a serious response was like wait. What family someone has to go find the family of the dead deer and let it know that mom dad is dead. I thought I thought I thought you were going to say that. They had told him to go pick it up in. Us The media. It's actually. It's actually a thing you know. I was surprised that they didn't give in where they are and whatnot. But maybe it was. Hey here's where it is if anyone wants to go picking up and eat it. It's only been a couple of hours. Probably Maga's haven't gotten to it yet. I Dunno next door is an entertaining beast. I have not far in my life avoided getting into it and I'd like to keep about if you like to read just just completely nonsense cyncical stuff and crazy neighbors. It is definitely for you. I spent a decent amount of time in my life on twitter quotient. I need man all right. So let's dive into some stories here. the first one is a propublica a article about the. Tsa over a million in ninety five masks even the airports are basically emt and TSA staffing levels down And it really doesn't need one point. Three million in ninety five masks and so this was concerns were raised back in April and You know they were saying we should donate these and people said No. We're not GONNA donate them. We're GONNA WE'RE GONNA keep them Very interesting are the. Tsa agents working at the customer facing roles wearing masks at all I think they are right at the PX. They are okay but like started masks. Not An five sir. I'm pretty sure they're surgical haven't seen in ninety five used as sort of a weird thing with just the whole and ninety five situation at those are the ones that are going to see. A product guarantee knows transmission By what you know when you ask the question like one is the goal of wearing the mask and how much of it are you trying to control? Obviously one hundred percent time for. Everyone doesn't work right because we don't have the supplies and so someone someone wanted. Today is gonNA open up a warehouse in fine wherever the government put like all the ones they hijacked from the states and from everybody else they're going to be stored somewhere but it is kind of weird and it's instead the says that CSS quietly stored many of them in a warehouse near DFW. We're paying for the warehouse space. Yeah so anyway. It's it's it was expected that this would this would last thirty days. That surplus would last thirty days for all of their security officers but did did not account for the decline in the number of officers needed lately so with air down like ninety five percent in the US. I would suspect it would last a lot longer. I would pose the question. They asked you change their staffing levels knowing them. Let's that's a good question I don't know here's the thing though forty days. That's only if you take. What are one point? Three million two hundred forty only thirty two thousand five hundred so that really don't have there's only thirty thousand thirty thousand. Tsa agents working working per day on for some number's higher. I don't know it seems low for sure and also only one master person per day. The lunch break. You gotta put it back on. The in theory is a really bad idea. Of course I've been wearing the same one for three months now so nothing. Maybe maybe some people out there who were flown have seen what the what the. Tsa agents are wearing. Just let us know. Because I mean I've only been once during all this and other than that have been getting updates on their twitter so next up so Cessna has a new plane. The Cessna Sky Career completed. Its first flight this week. New Clean Design Clean Sheet designed aircraft. Pretty Amazing thought it would never happening again. I will say it. Looks like a minivan of the sky. But it's supposed to be more many. It's supposed to be more like the Ford Transit to fifty or three fifty. Oh Yeah Yeah. That's exactly what it is East Sprinter van. Yeah somethings bolted onto top.
Bringing Generations Closer Together
"Welcome to kind world. I'm ESPN Amer. And I'm Andrea Swayed. So yes me mean. I don't know about you. Being in quarantine has led me to talk on the phone more than I have in a very very long time. You are not kidding. Most nights like during dinner. We just leave our phone on like we have dinner with other people and it's a really really good way to connect when we can actually see them. Yeah my friend Landry and I. We used to go to the movies once a week and now we are basically watching movies together but separately and earn apartments and then afterward we facetime each other and we talk about the movies as if we had just watched it together on the movie screen. I mean that's just what you have to do. I mean you just cannot overstate how important technology has been and keeping US connected but I do think our dependence on this has inevitably caused some people to feel left out and someone who knows that all too well is sixteen year. Old Jordan Midler Thank you all for joining us today for our next online zoom class. We have a lot in store. For every Sunday. Jordan teaches a free technology class designed specifically for seniors. It all started back when he was a middle school and his family gave his grandparents a pair of smartphones. He quickly realized they needed just a little bit of help to figure out how to use them. I spent numerous times on the phone with my grandparents and walking them through simple procedures like sending a message of phone. Call sending an email downloading APP but Jordan wanted to go beyond his grandparents. He wanted to help other people of their generation benefit from the tech tools. We have right now so he started teaching a class at a free space in his high school in New York and the class was pretty popular but when everything in the city shut down because of Cova Nineteen Jordan decided to keep teaching this time online. Today's lesson is going to be revolving around online banking. That is something that we're all in a situation that we need to us. I think it's such. It's an enormous service that he's providing. I think it's It's a credit to him and it's a credit to him that he wants to. He wants to do what he wants to do. The people like US people like me. That's Rosalyn Zueger. One of Jordan's students rosalind is originally from Ireland. But she's been in the US for more than sixty years at ninety. She lives alone but she maintains a pretty active social life. This lockdowns been really tough on her. But the skills she's learned in Jordan's class have helped her feel more comfortable using technology to connect more with family and friends. I think that made a big difference to my situation being alone ear. I'm not lonely at all and I know I can. I can zoom in to anybody. I like it any time with that. I find that I can get through today. Jacques get through the weeks Jordan. Says his class size has more than doubled. Since going online. My goal is to be able to be able to spread my classes and expanded in a way that any senior is able to assess the classes.
"middle school" Discussed on This Unmillennial Life
"If your skin doesn't know whether to break out a wrinkle if you're caught between planning the Third Grade Class Party and researching retirement plans or if you want to work out at the idea of cross bit makes your forty something needs. You've come to the right place. Welcome to unrelenting. You'll live I'm your host Ray and Jones and welcome to today's show and welcome back for the second a half a season three. I hope you had a wonderful break. If you are listening to this episode in real time I hope you had a wonderful holiday season and are enjoying a great start. Start the new year. If you are listening to this either on rewind or at some other point welcome to this on millennial life. I'm glad that you're here and I hope that whatever season you find yourself herself in right now you are enjoying it now for today's episode. We are going to kick off the second half of the school year with a topics topics specifically designed for those of us who have children either in middle school now or perhaps going into middle school and I know that's not everyone but as with with so many of these episodes you tell me that even if you don't think that the topic pertains to you often if you take the time to listen you will find something that is of used to those in in your life so I hope that you will listen today for helpful. Tips from my guest about how we navigate this changing landscape landscape of finding ourselves being parents to middle schoolers. Now this episode actually came about a little something like this late spring. I mean last year I got an email from a fan of the show named Corinne and she said Hi there. I'd love to hear an episode or two about parenting upper elementary. Mary and Middle School kids. There are millions of books and websites about parenting little kids. Hell you can commiserate with any preschool parent about potty training or picky eaters but when the kids are bigger they demand and deserve privacy. How do you know what apps are appropriate? How do you help them navigate a social life? How do you handle Social Drama Rama and having the right clothes? It's so much harder than parenting babies. She goes on to say a read the book below and really enjoyed it. Maybe the author might be a resource. Corinne I'm so glad that you email me and I'm so glad that you introduce me to author of the book that you're talking about middle school makeover lake over her name is Michelle and to be honest with you. I guy that chance to interview Michelle twice only once all the time that I've been putting this podcast together. If I ever ever had technical difficulties that ended up not recording an episode and I had a wonderful recording with Michelle many months ago really honestly before school ever started and then as unfortunate luck would have it. That interview didn't record so because Michelle was on deadline to who get her second book out which we will talk about in this episode. We waited a little while and we came back and we did a whole fresh new episode. It was fresh on both of our minds nine because we had been so long since we had done it together and. I think that you're going to hear that in today's episode as we go through this topic so with that let me introduce you to Michelle Shell. Michelle is an internationally known speaker author and educator who helps kids parents and teachers navigate the tricky middle school social world so her first book the one that Corinne told me about middle school makeover really gives parents insight to see what middle school is like in a whole new way. At at the time we spoke she was in the process of turning in the manuscript for her second book. Fourteen by fourteen. So those of you who have children already in middle school. You're going to pay attention to that part of the interview. That book is intended to help. Parents tackle the fourteen essential conversations. They should have off before their kids. Start High School so with that I will simply say Michelle. Welcome to the show. Hi thanks for having me. I'm so glad to have you on. It's it's been tough being able to match up schedules. You are such an in demand author. I know you're working on your next book and I hope we get a chance to talk about that. But specifically specifically a member of my audience had read one of your books about making the transition to being a parent of a middle schooler are and I just thought we could talk about you. Know what what it is like how difficult it is or parents To help children navigate this. Jump into Middle School I would love to. It's my favorite thing to talk about. We'll tell us really emotionally mentally physically. You know who where our kids when and they're making this jump into middle school compared to what it was like in elementary school. Sure so for me. The kind of Magic ages eleven although although that's very generic for some kids start little sooner or something a little bit later and For boys typically comes a little bit later but eleven is about the age when kids start Undergoing what I call The middle school construction project and so they start to build the three do things that they need to become an adult. And those are they need an adult body. So they're going through. All the hormonal changes and development physical mental changes ages of becoming an adult They need an adult brain. So eleven is when your brain kind of restructures itself to be able. Oh to think differently. For example kids stop thinking so concrete around that age and start testing getting hypotheticals and that means if you have an eleven year rolled at home. You've got a kid who likes to argue and isn't very good at it because they're beginning to get a get an interest in Sort of intangibles. You know so that. And that's a hard thing to argue about so there's an adult body and adult brain and then my very favorite component is. They're starting to develop their adult adult identity. And what that means is they're figuring out who they are apart from their parents They no longer want to be seen as a mini me to mom or dad or whoever's delivers raising that They really want to separate out and figure out who they are in the world as a standalone and not mean examining their beliefs and their preferences preferences and all that stuff and that also can can be a trying time for parents at home as someone who has a middle. Schooler has an elementary students getting closer Mr to middle school it it is. It's a tough time and I know I was so receptive to having you on the show after a listener audience mentioned it. Because I thought now I need this help as well What kind of help can you give parents to help them? Understand how to better navigate. It's a whole new world and as one of the fans of the show said in an email to me I mean there are. There's no shortage of resources to teach parents how to potty train and deal Jio with picky eaters but they're they're really just doesn't seem to be as much guidance at this stage for parents there is not you're right and draws me to this area But mostly it's just that I love developmentally what these kids are going through and my hope is that I can sort of change the lens through which people see Middle School because most people I know If you ask them about middle school either to reflect on their own experience like you couldn't pay that money to go back to the middle school so awkward and such a strange time Where and or they carry that forward so when their kids are going into middle school? They say I'm reading it. I just want to get through it. Let's get pasta. And my hope is to first and foremost have parents rethink that. Because I think it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy not and what I hope I. My first book is provide parents. Some relief around this is natural and not only. Is it normal for your kid to behave this way. Good and here's why they they really do separate from you and that can be messy and that can feel defiant but you want that in the long run. Let's talk about that separation. Let's talk about Y. You want that separation what that might look like what the benefits really are in a wind. Children are exerting some of that that that separation then really help parents can feel comfortable leaning into that. Yeah I love the way you phrase leaning into it So why do parents want this. We have to remind ourselves that our goal is to get our kids out there and not be dependent on US anymore starting again at around age eleven the beginning of developing that identity. Kids are trying to figure out how to do that. And it comes across as argumentative contrarian or just defiant for no reason but truly truly. They're really trying to figure out what what do I think. I've always believed what my parents believe. But maybe I shouldn't. Maybe I should examine my own morals and principles and values and they should The reason that you want them to do that. In addition to we WANNA have strong kids who have opinions of their own and are critical thinkers and all of that Dixon the next big phase of development. After you figure out what your unique identity is is figuring out how to partner up with other people. So when they're in the later ages of highschool certainly in college and then when they go out and the world. They're going to start looking at romantic relationships chips and certainly they do that. But it said affair very different level I'm talking about the kind of relationship that you remember for the rest of your life and that impacts future relationships so so if your child doesn't have a good sense of who they are. They are far more likely to end up in a relationship that is co dependent on someone else and that from being. We really don't want for kids. I'd never really thought about it. That way. Just in terms of exerting independence. I guess I've been thinking about you. Know exerting independence in risk-taking Vis the the the idea and the concept that it really helps formulate and have an put us on a trajectory for the relationships we have in the future is is is opening Just something that I got about. Yeah we tend to think of our kids in relation to US only and that's part of this The painful Minnesota this this phase of life and they pull away because we've only ever known members in relation to us but we have to shift our thinking into how is this person going to find find a partner. How are they going to Maintain relationships with co workers that are valuable in that aren't toxic and friends and you know we create create a really nice Kalina for kids but out of round middle school. They start to figure out that their future is not with us and so oh. They've got to figure out how to be likable to peers. They've got to figure out how to relate to other people naturally. There's so much drama and middle school because they recognize the importance of it. They don't quite know how to do it. Well yet takes a lot of practice. Let's talk about that drama. Let's talk about what I so many parents but you know peer parents parents parents of children. My my kids age ages Let's talk about where maybe the line is. How parents know you know the difference between allowing social conflict to play out versus understanding?.
"middle school" Discussed on ON BOYS Podcast
"Man box according to society or or blond in the women's box according to society I had them all answer at the same time and it was sorta based voice consensus where it was going to go. It was almost US near unanimous agreement on every single one and for the parts the boys and girls were in complete agreement for both so they collectively decided things like tender. Hindering Compassionate could go into the girls box only and things like strong and embiid could go into the boys only and what was really powerful about. This activity was They were able to see such clarity. That when you address one groups issues and the constraints that one group is grappling with then that WBAP benefits both benefits everybody. They were really on the same team and it and it was clear to both of them. At that point. It's such a concrete. Exercise is to which is great because kids this age. They're beginning to have abstract thoughts and be able to function on that but they're still really concrete in a lot of ways so when you can literally see that we put strong appear for boys but then over here is this girl who does shotput shotput and is awesome will clearly. She's strong so wait. Maybe these things that we've been taught aren't entirely accurate. It helps them see this in themselves and their friends and it also makes them feel a little manipulated by society. And if you really WANNA get a kid to have the courage courage to break outside of those constraints tell them that society is manipulating them at this for this age about really powerful motivator and so if they I feel like someone is telling them who they should be in what they should do then they are going to Bristle they are not going to like all of these adults being so directive with them about their choices behaviors and they're going to be more likely to actually act as their authentic selves. So Phyllis I asked in my voice alive facebook group. If anyone had questions for you they were very excited that we could bring this directly to you and questions was how to keep them safe from trying vaping and other substances that their friends might have so I recently learned about something called inoculation theory. It's a professor Josh Compton at Dartmouth College and what inoculation theory is. Is this idea that you can inoculate someone and against a behavior you don't want them to do in the same way you inoculate them against the virus and the way it works is and I'll use vaping in this case as an example. Although it's it's cool about this research is that if you do it with enough scenarios it will generalize and it will be able to apply. I'll give you a second example after so for vaping you so you might say to them when you are at school. There might be a time when there are kids. Who Want you to come with them in the bathroom? And you might want to do it because you really want to fit in with those friends and you don't really think aping is bad dangerous. It's it's basically just fruity flavors and it's not as bad as smoking but actually that the advertisers. I'm trying to convince you when in fact there is a lot of good science that says that it's just as addictive as smoking and it just either the various way it can harm you and you're not looking to use scare tactics. You have to make sure that you're giving them factual information but what you're doing is you're telling them what kind of situation they might face and you're giving them away to think it's through in multiple ways before they're in it so another example. Yeah go ahead and again. You're kind of using their desire to not be manipulated by the media by other people using that positive way. Yes here's another example. Let's take gossip. You might take to your kid. And by the way boys gossip as much as girls which is another nest that people have that only girls engaged in relational aggression. Boys can be pretty good at it too so you could say to them when someone tells you a really juicy piece of information information you are going to be tempted to share it because everyone likes to have the best story and it is fun to be the keeper of information but you know what even more satisfying to be known as a loyal and trustworthy friend to be the person that people come to when something really important and big is going on in their life. So you're framing these scenario than ways where you're acknowledging what they're going to have to be what they're up against that interference and interference can be all kinds. The things that could be wanting to fit in it could be jealousy. It could be anger. It could be anything so you're crying them to expect that interference and then giving them a counter hunter dialogue that they can retrieve in these moments where they're going to be tempted to do the wrong thing really wish I talked to you. Three kids ago Phyllis so phyllis I'm just curious how I work with a lot of parents and I just want to give them the support and love and mid reassurance and it's all gonna be okay and yet their future pacing. They're worried they're they're middle. Schooler isn't anything can get into college and they're going to end up in jail. And how do we reassure parents bring them back into the present with their kids kids even though it might feel kind of ugly in the present with out of control behavior with the kid who's sending pictures of his private privates do his friend experimenting with vaping other substances cursing at their parents. Not You. Yeah no not getting off devices when asked playing loud music. What are your words? I know that's a lot. But what are what are your words. There's of reassurance to these parents I would worry when your kids stops pushing back because when your kid arguing with you when your kids pushing your buttons than what they are doing is they think they're having a productive conversation with you. They're trying to figure out what mysterious thing is going on in your head. Yes they might eight rebel against it but they also very much care about your values and what you expect and hope for them and they also have big dreams and hopes for themselves and they two are frustrated when it's messy and things don't go as planned and I just remind parents that isn't the greatest gift to let them experiment and make mistakes. Estate can be there to help them recover and help them build that resilient so that when they're thirty and you're not by their side they know what they need you to pick up the pieces. They know how to make them and they know how to regulate their emotions I would as a parent just constantly look at it as building. What their way I were they talking back to the teacher? Why are arguing with me? What is it that they need? And how is there an alternative way that I can meet this need so that it's not quite as messy. And how can I give them a path back to being a good kid hit as quickly as possible and just be consistent and lobbing because. Shane is going to get you nowhere anyway. And if we maintain high expectations the the research shows that there are more likely to live up to our expectations but those expectations also have to be reasonable. And it's just a fact that parenting is kind of a messy and uneven path and kids have big growth spurt intellectually and emotionally and sometimes they take two steps back and the best we can do for them is to help them recover from those mistakes and move forward. If you have not picked up a copy of villas book yet. I highly recommend it. It is middle. School matters the ten key skills. Kids need to thrive in middle school and Beyond and and she's got a whole separate chapter in there specifically looking at boys so if that's your concern you skip right ahead to that one. But there's a lot of great stuff in here Bilas and if you are on twitter follow her on twitter. She shares need most hilarious anecdotes conversations with middle school. Kids Edit it reminds you of where their heads really are. Thank you though Phyllis. Where can people find you so I have a website which she's still a single dot com? I am on twitter. That's at a p Fagel and I- fairly regularly have a column in The Washington Post and the book of course the book. Of course. Yes you so much for being that person WHO's as we're recording in this. You are sitting in your Middle School Counseling Office for being on the scene every day. We all appreciate you doing that. And and helping these kids grow and also just sharing your wisdom with parents and other educators. Thank you thank you. Thank you for having me on. I I love this age group. Thanks for joining on boys. Real real talk about parenting teaching and reaching tomorrow's men..
"middle school" Discussed on ON BOYS Podcast
"Fatal says is a stew of simmering during warm owns shifting relationships and increased expectations. It is also a time of massive confusion and overwhelm home both for middle school boys and their parents. Today we are talking with Phyllis Fagel parent counselor and author third of Middle. School matters the ten key skills. Kids need to thrive in middle school and Beyond and how parents can help welcome. Welcome Phyllis thanks for having me today. We should mention that you are not just an author. You are not just a school counselor. You are in the trenches with the rest of US parenting teens and a middle schooler. I believe yet I'm on my middle school number three. He's my last to go through. He's in sixth grade now. So does it get easier. I think third children in general are easier because they have to go through through a gentler way they just sort of know that everyone is tired and they tend to be more easy going. I could have just gotten lucky. He but he seems to be a pretty chill middle score. I think that third and fourth children might be a little easier partly because we have lowered our expectations -tations dramatically. You know you know a lot more now about what is reasonable to expect from a middle school boy than you did. When you started this journey journey at one hundred percent true so middle school boys one of the most fascinating things to me as a pair of Boyce voice has been the insight into what middle school boys are really thinking about and how I perceived middle school boys say when I was in seventh grade? You work with a lot of boys. I know you facilitate boys group so share with us. What have you learned what is on the minds of middle school boys? I think the misconception about middle school boys. That's most prevalent is that they're really immature that their ears they're not interested in unloading the psychological burdens that they're grappling with and that they had here and enjoy adhering to a lot out of the gender stereotypes that we hold about boys and one thing. That's calm clear over the years particularly through the boys group which has been a safe space for them To admit what they're really thinking about and what they really care about is bad. Boys very much wanted to connect with their friends. They very much want you have meaningful bonds. Where they can confide in their friends and know that they can trust their friends they really want to be able to be their authentic selves in? That might mean they really like school and they really don't like sports courts. I think another misconception is that they don't worry about things like body image. What I've found over the years and I think social media is in part responsible responsible for this is that boys are getting subjected to all of these unrealistic images about who they should be in what they should look like and I'm hearing more from boys about body and security? I think that whole body image issue is so tough for boys in middle school because they're such a drastic range. I've gone to middle school basketball ballgames and some of those kids are shaving and have full mustaches. And then there was like my kid at that point in time who still looked like he was in third great but he was actually in seventh grade. Yeah then what makes it even harder is. You're suddenly in a new developmental phase where you're acutely aware of exactly how you stock doc up to everybody around you so a year earlier you might not have cared that you are half the height of the kid standing next to you on the bleachers during the chorus concert but suddenly all you can think about is what if I never grow. What if I'm the shortest person on the planet for the rest of my life and that matters in a way that it didn't matter before And and you are very aware of other people and you're starting to help other people like you and when all the images you see are of these very attractive attractive very mature men. That's tough yeah and then on top of all of that. They're starting to get interested in romantic relationships chips. So they're more aware of how they stack up to their peers. In terms of their level of attractiveness to whatever gender they happened to be attracted to but that also so come into play at this age. And how do we as parents support them. We can reassure you're gonNA grow you. Will you know oh you will. By the time you graduate from high school you will probably be shaving but as you say in the meantime so I think that very well meaning instinct is to reassure them that their time will come and that they will become taller and that this is a short-lived phenomenon and that they're great and perfect just the way they are but that invalidates where they're coming from and so more effective approach for helping them feel better is to say. I felt like the shortest kid and the clash. That would bother me too and I can understand why this is troublesome for you and then tell them perhaps. There's a story story of someone else in the family. He was a late bloomer. Who started out really short you now you know Ankle Bob is six four but also reassuring them that whatever or they are? We'll be good enough and that's really what they're looking for. Not for you so much to say you're going to be this high or that hike but just to let them know especially at an age when they're forming their identity. I'm trying to figure out if they're good enough to really reassure them that they're perfect just as they are that. Am I good enough question. You write in. Your book is a AAC core question for all middle schoolers boys and girls. But I think it's something that's really important for us as parents and educators grandparents to to keep in mind that these kids are looking all around them for reassurance. Basically that they're okay. Yes and with boys the way they tried to you get that reassurance can sometimes seem Veer toward the obnoxious. So they might yell something out. That's an appropriate. They might push someone together right. Hey that's been. They might use humor in ways that others think are rude and so we have to also remember that while they're trying to figure out if they're good enough and they're doing everything they can to make sure they're good enough and funny enough and well like you're not they also are lacking and skills and we have to cut them a lot of slack as they are developing those skills else we have to dig into this obnoxious part. Having lived with four boys I am acutely familiar with what you're talking about and you wrote a few things in in your book that just cracked me up. In one sentence you wrote a mature eighth grade. Boy May baffle his parents by sticking his head in a toilet for fun on social media And I was sitting in a public place that I just burst out laughing because yes boy mobs especially this does not make sense to you us. How break this down help explain it and how do we know like should I worry about this? Should I let this happen. How do respond so I completely understand that as a boy mom myself they are capable of doing things that are battling one of the other stories I share in? The book is about a kid. Kid who four or five for shock value started exchanging pictures with a friend on on his same sports team of his private parts parts and they were just moving around. It wasn't sexual. It was just silly and then the mom was spot checking his own team across a bunch of pictures of her kids kids private parts and some other kids private parts and was like what is best. She just really couldn't make heads or tails of that but felt he had gone too far. Lauren knew that there was some teaching that had to happen. Related to to what they were doing to expose themselves in that way and permanent and all of that so it's impossible for us as adults who are rational logical thinkers. Choose to view something like most of the time or we try. We like to think of ourselves that way. It's hard for us to see something like that and make sense of it. But if you're a bad boy and you think it's really hilarious. Then you're going to want to do more of it. You might even want to send it to like some other people so other people can appreciate how funny you are. Yeah because it's really funny. No I just shared this story the other day with a group I was talking to my son. And although maybe don't turn me in Tom for sharing this story other than to your podcast listeners. So he came home and he said I want to tell you something but I'm afraid that if I tell you then you you will never get me a phone and I said well. I'm never getting your phone anyway. So you may as well tell me this story and he said well. Here's what my what happened between a couple of my friends. And he shared this story of it with a story about an hour and a girl and the boy had asked the girl to send him a picture. Sure without her shirt on and they kind of knew better and I guess they decided to include the keeney top so it wasn't quite as scandalous uh-huh and they loved each other. 'cause they're sixth graders and it's true love so she sent the picture and then they thought it would be really funny. The the two of them together totally consensual totally in good fun. Thought it would be really funny to doctor the picture and give her a porn star beads. Oh and yeah. Yeah and so when they did that then they were even more amused by their extreme creativity and it was hilarious and because it was hilarious area decided to send it to the forty five students boys and girls in their shared kept. Yeah Oh and it actually gets worse believe it or not but the way it gets worse I think says so much about boys and how they love hard and they care hurt and they mean well and they're just making some blenders along the way. So what next is the kids in this text. Groups didn't give them the reaction that they wanted there. Is this kind of stunned silence. Yes you know sort of a dude. What are you thinking? At which point the girl was no longer happy with the decision and the boy was feeling bad that she wasn't feeling good about it so he did the most logical rational reasonable caring loving thing he could possibly do which was to host a doctor picture of himself. Oh boy oh it makes sense in like Sandler and boy world right right. It made a lot of sense to him and it was it was loving. It was really caring. And he's so bad that she was embarrassed and he didn't want her to feel alone so he did the same thing and of course his gesture was met with the exact same response as hers. Only at this point I think a mother who was monitoring somebody somebody in that group chops tax. Shut the thing down and that was the end of it but what I love about that story that it reveals so much about boys at this age you know. Are they love hard. They care her they mean well they WANNA be funny. They wanted he like they want to connect to and impress but they don't really have that skill L. set to pull it off in a way that doesn't sometimes occasionally result in humiliation and embarrassment and odd shock on the part of the parents right that that story also reveals to me why parenting these children is so challenging because when we put our lens on that without talking to the children we can get a whole different narrative out of that and if we start reacting based on that then we create eight misunderstanding and distance in anger and that's problematic and then the other thing that makes me think about in your book you used the term hinge generation a hinge generation to describe this generation of boys. And.
"middle school" Discussed on Focus On the Family Daily Broadcast
"A parent observe our boys and their friends as they begin to find their voice and guys guys you can now speak to this has one thing that we expect in our family is that you can say anything. You need to do it respectfully and agree or not agree with you. We'll still hear you out. There's nothing you can do to make me love you any less right and i think that plays into the component of faith to parents because that's the way lord has relationship with us think about how many times we've disappointed disappointed god yet. He loves us. No less fact i'd have to believe every day there's more they're considering grace and forgiveness and as a parent we're supposed to be modelling and now these guys take that message and go to school in their friends are all finding their voice but there's not always that respect factor there. I think we've had a few coversations about that. I think like it's not like one particular drum. It can just be like spread throughout middle school pretty much theme of like if you don't do something that somebody wants or if you were. We're doing something different but used to be friends. They're going to kind of poke and prod at you if you aren't exactly the way that they thought you were. They want you to be sure i mean that's got to be some pressure. The social media is big pressure as well so i mean. How do you manage that <hes> with your friend groups. Luckily middle school instagram was already. Are you start out but it wasn't like yeah. I wasn't allowed to have a little bit later on to <hes> middle school yeah. How about you on the other hand what was going on a little more <hes> impact with social committee i mean i didn't really care about social media that much until i got older i mean what about your friend group and junior high did they were they already diving diving in all my friends had social media like snapchat was a big thing. Everybody can get that for much after everybody else did so. I was kind of behind on the crew to right yeah. One of the things that i remember seeing the book is that you had a group that you called the squad yeah. Oh yeah that was pretty important to you. Yeah i liked the front in group and then after a while everybody just split off and form though i mean what's the genesis of that so it was just a bunch of people with similar mueller likings and then i met one person from the squad and then i kinda got like grouped in and then it just grew from there started out with like five people grew to like almost sixteen and yeah just went from there and then in the end of like eighth grade through eighth grade to kind of split off because everybody had different classes and that's a tribe that you get to be a part of particularly important as you enter middle school jonathan. How much intention -ality did you and your wife apply. I to the friend development side. These are the pillow talks parents have about you. Do you know do you know the friend read has. Aren't you worried about him. I mean have you noticed what he says doc over at our house okay so here's something eric and i did when the boys were still in elementary school. We started telling them things is that we knew would stick and one day would would they'd have to contemplate one of the phrases we say as be more influential than you are easily influenced and i would believe the best compliment apparent here would say will you have your child spend more time with my son my daughter because your child be a good influence on them. I've never quite understood. I don't want you hanging out with little tommy over here because he's a bad influence. Sorry buddies names. Tommy want you hanging out with that kid because he's a bad influence. Basically i've just told my sons that other child that other middle schooler is more influential on you then. You're on yourself and more influence on you than we can be so i gave them. The power be more influential than you are easily influenced that means you can be friends with anybody right. I like possibly influence them for the positive. You did that work out for you guys. Did you apply that. When did that light come on that okay. I get what dads they raise us. Those sayings at just helped us find people who were like who were kind of close to what we liked like. I like theater and middle school so i found people like that but but i also wasn't afraid of like oh are they into something different or something. That's a little bit sketchy. Now i can influence them more than they will. Influence me. I won't do anything that i would not want my parents to not see that. I wouldn't want my parents to not hear me. Do i would want to do what i'm trying to say. Is i would do anything with my friends that i would do with my family. You know i wouldn't want to do with your family watching a good axiom and that's a good rule of thumb to follow. Did you always follow lewitt daddy. You know it's just sometimes those difficult spots in junior junior high what typically young people lack confidence to be that influencers so jonathan as a father. How how could you even even in addition to what you said. Which is one thing half the time and i don't know about you boys but half the time you're not even sure your sixth grade or seventh graders actually listening you know they're doing something else and you think they're hearing you but i'm on behalf of many parents that are having these discussions with them. Sometimes it sounds like like a lecture and they can turn off rather than a dialogue zeph fair. Call that's fair. You're reacting to that okay. Sometimes it's like i'm in a bad mood or something. I don't don't wanna listen to what he has to say but it's usually important but it's just kind of going in one year and out the other and that's why he kinda after a pita. Sometimes it gets annoying. It's still in there somehow and then you you remember that and it's let me ask you this question. How is young people and you know fresh off of the junior high experience fifteen. Let's not long ago now. What would you say in coaching parents. How can we do a better job communicating. I think that you got to communicate to your your child into your middle schooler through love and understanding and like understand where they are talk to them. Ask them instead of saying go. Do your homework or go. Read your book you. How can i help you. You know what's what's giving some troubles. Do you need help with that. You know that's good advice and this is focus on the family with jim daly. I'm i'm john fuller and our guest. Today are the katherine men we have read coal and jonathan catherine. They wrote the book the manual middle school the do this not that survival. I will guide for guys. There's a lot of great stuff in here and we're going to encourage you to get this. We're going to bundle it with the c._d. For you to review and maybe listen listen to with your kid and the website is focused on the family dot com slash broadcast and our number is eight hundred the letter in the word family. You know in the book. I i think it's you call. There's an incident where you did some damage to the garage door or was there any damage to the garage. The damage to the house garage door explained the garage door problem and what that taught you so for context. I was yes i ended bowen arrows shooting the narrow <hes> don't know what got into me thought that it would be interesting to see what it would be like to like pull back with the opposite hand and does it work well with doesn't work well and you shouldn't try it with an arrow in the i don't even know living shot off went into the garage and i is like i'm going to die like my friends are gonna luckily they didn't but what happened was they. Were doing a renovation on their bathroom. So my smart self i went to the bathroom got some of the wall putting drywall putty spackling put it onto holders and textured it but some dirt on to make london with the garage door or you know and then you know it was good for a couple of weeks and then we were driving into the driveway. My dad was like is that a boat on the front or front door <hes> it's like. I don't know what that is. No there's something on the garage door and we went up and checked and of course it was bumped from the exit yeah exactly so then what happened so okay so instead of yelling or instead of getting mad at me i mean i guess he was like why didn't you tell me weeks ago uh-huh but after that he taught me how to fix the problem and we together yeah so it worked out so dad's ah driving up and seeing the garage door with this dimple on the outside. I knew immediately what had happened and we asked. Does anybody know what happened to the garage door. And of course nobody could remember so. This is what i appreciate about. The boys is i could see in their faces. They both knew but they weren't ready to tell me. I didn't know i read shows up shortly thereafter. I have to confess. I shot an arrow. Uh store and i could see the fear in his eyes and this is where you go. Okay yes discipline right and so it's time to be disciplined. Now we believe if you are either self disciplined or somebody else has to discipline you either way. You need to be disciplined and so i said well you need to be disciplined and the discipline and this is you need need to fix a garage door the way the garage door needs to be fixed and i will show you how and we'll discuss from there. What follows and i was thinking okay. It's going to depend on his attitude now does he. He you know go off the deep end and tell me something. I'm so bad for making a fix garage door. He dove right in that garage door. Got the full treatment. It looks great. I mean he had multiple layers of paint on the whole thing it was. He did a great job so we learned a really good lesson. Now jim a moment ago you asked about confidence in his middle school school a boys' in middle school competence important it absolutely is important but how do we get confidence right. I believe competence follows capabilities so if we can teach these these young men capabilities. They know they're able that means. Their confidence level increases so using i i don't care karaj doors. I mean i do my house but he is more important than a garage door and i know he's already learned a lesson about firing a narrow through the house into the garage but it's the so what can we do with this. Now i teach him something to make him more confident through a capability which would be in this case repairing the garage door and also maintain our relationship lasting. I wanna do is fixed. <unk> break our relationship. Let me on that serious subject that we you know handle the little light-heartedly the bullying issue because boys can be really hard on each other especially at the junior high age which is what we're talking about. Did you ever encounter that. How did you deal with it. Maybe jonathan from your perspective is dad. How did you even inquire about whether or not it was occurring so let's start with the guys here. Did you ever experience it. I had a couple of people who are mean to me. Me bows like more of trying to pick at me to see how far they could go. Tigana like really mad and i'd like patience enough to not care but there were some kids kids that just really got on my nerves and i would yell back at them like not anything bad. I would just get mad and be like shut up. Shut up be quiet and nothing really past that but some were just picking you to get on your nerves so that they could be better than us. Somehow right that's true. I mean it's a tough time alive for me. It was more name name-calling and just like you know just dumb names and so i think my experience with that and my memory of that is just that love and trying to see what's going on in their lives is more powerful than heat and trying to break down somebody else's life and so i've it actually made a few friends yeah not naming names but you know somebody was picking on me. I talked to them so i was going on and and found out that like you know they weren't having a great time in their life at that point and we became friends and we were this day off on and then also just the people people we may not be friends but you know some other people i've just talked to them and it stopped because just communication and simple acts.
"middle school" Discussed on Focus On the Family Daily Broadcast
"When trenton troy started middle school. I think it's all that apprehension you know. They don't really have enough confidence yet. They're trying to figure you're out what they're good at what they're strong at doing and there's a lot of doubt and that's certainly true on the boy side. I remember i mean some older kid. Kinda kinda hit me in the chest and a p._e. Class because he was defining for a friend of his how well built he was kinney. I tracked my my sternum and then he said oh. I'm sorry i didn't know you couldn't take a light punch which made all the words yeah but that is that's kinda middle school. That's what happens. I mean guys boys always trying to figure out the pecking order who's who and who's good athlete and all that stuff and it's rare for a young man not to go through some kind of torture there but it's it's great to hear what many schools are doing like in that clip. We heard where older kids are mentoring the younger kids yeah. We didn't have a lot of that no no it. It didn't happen that way right and today. We want to give you some tools to help you. Guide your child and you as a parent through these transition shen phases like from elementary school to junior high school and you may be going through that right now and we have some wonderful guests. The catherine's jonathan kathrein who has two sons read and coal reading coal are both middle school survivors so that's a good thing and they have lots of great insights to share with us they do and they've they've written. A book called the manual to middle school the do this not that survival guide for guys and we're so glad to have them here. It really is an insightful book. Jonathan's been here before and it must be fun to have his boys with him. Welcome to focus walking back. Thank you thank you. It's great to be back yeah. That's fun. This is kind of unique. You know having a dad with us to <hes> almost adult sons right. You guys are on that pathway now. How old are you. I'm fifteen eighteen eighteen okay. We'll talk about that later but welcome in it is a good thing. How did you decide to bundle all this this advice into one book for young people young men particularly who are about to enter middle school or who are in the throes of middle school. Whose idea was it so you remember when i was here last time we're talking about the manual demanded and i had written that book for my sons right shortly after returning back home and contemplating. What's our next project. These two guys were sitting at the dining table over dinner. Talking about middle school because coal was just leaving. Elementary school headed into middle school and reed was just leading middle school headed into high school so over. A couple of dinners was likely what should i do. What should i do advice was flying. I looked at each at the guys and i go adding. We've got another book here. Guys yeah right no kidding so read. Let me ask you in that transition especially into medical school if you can reach back that many years now what were those sir those feelings those emotions that you had read. It's all good on so going into middle school so i think it was kind of stressful stressful. It was like what am i going to do. I'd been in elementary school. How many since kindergarten fifth grade so that's about six years that that was where my homeless that's what i was comfortable with going into a sixth grade and into middle school. It was like it's a much bigger school. There's way more kids there. I don't know what i'm going to do. I'm worried that i'm gonna mess up or them. Not gonna make any friends. Friends will sure and so fear is one thing you don't the unknown. How 'bout you call. I luckily had to read to help me watching at that session blake okay. What do i do like it there so you were observing your older brother. Yeah parents don't always get that. We don't know if you're watching to watch. I was freaking out and what was causing you. Strain or anxiety lockers were scary. You get to put yourself in a box that was like behind metal door. They can't always open. That's just freaky yeah and then you had to remember a combination which you thought you'd never remember exact. I can remember that also just the canada for the guys particularly that pecking order would i alluded to in the opening is true isn't it. I mean it's maybe unspoken but you're trying to figure out who who's who. What group do you fit in <hes>. Did you have some of that anxiety exile as well yeah i think so because i had a friend <hes> i think he was in some great at the time but he was talking to me about how like like guys are gonna find out who they are and like kind of like mess around with you. If if you know what happened to yeah exactly yeah they think that you're weaker your smaller or you're a little bit different than the kind of like you know exactly. I mean that's not it. Sometimes it's very serious so i don't wanna make too much light of that but there there is something about the male orientation that you know you. Just you testing each other. You're trying to figure out who's the guy he was nice to me and he kind of like helped me through that. He was like oh yeah. I'll make sure not messes with you yeah. Well you know johnson being the parent. Let's go to that part. Wise an important for parents even pay attention. This is kind of the stuff that normally happens. Do we really have to be that engaged because kids are kids and they're going to learn the ropes well. These are some really critical formative years both four how are thinking and how other acting and going through middle school. I think a lot of it is a whole bunch of experimenting on. Does this work and should i repeat it does not work and how do i never do this again so as a apparent to give our kids the kind of advice that we believe is going to work but we can't force him. It's kind of like you can direct you can't steer for them and so what kind of direction action can we give our children as they make that big transition between elementary school middle school to set them up for the best potential success now. They're going to have to give it to go but if they don't know no often today they'll pull back and just not even engage right so i'm going to give them the best advice i can and share with them in any way i know how without forcing rushing down their throats so that it's their experience not my told them to experience yeah i think they every parent needs to go through the sharing gene versus forcing their kids and i think the you've got to build that relationship so it's not just happening at the middle school transition i mean in other words the happening sitting in the conversation you've got to build as a parent you got to build that trust and that open dialogue and how did that work for you three. Let's really unveil it here. Did you guys have a good did kind of communication line with an open with our family. It doesn't really matter. There's no huge walls between us. Don't you think that's the ground floor. You gotta able to communicate what happens. In a family where there is a lack of that communication. There's a distrust between the parent and the kid and there's not the ability to like talk about all your feelings to apparent which is always knock good for the cup and like that can build up and that can crumble relationships in a matter of time so oh. I'm sure you've had friends that fit that description. You guys talk about it at that level. When you're sixth seventh grade eighth grade you guys. Did you remember any conversation behind closed doors doors but then once we're once like i i realized that once i went into high school that's where we started to become comfortable talking about family life and like what's actually going interesting the truth ruth not just like brushing it over like oh yeah everything's fine. This happened but it's okay but you're right. This is what's going on now. That's good <hes> <hes> let me go to the faith component because that plays an important role obviously the role in christian homes and i guess the right questions what role does does faith play in preparing for middle school. How does a parent make sure that their kid is grounded. How many moms let me speak to the moms listening. We're are fearful fearful of that moment especially when their son and we're addressing sons today but you can apply these things to daughters obviously but when their sons are making that transition transition. I'm sure a lot of moms allow right so let's go back and look at faith. Context faith means. You've got to believe in something that isn't necessarily always seen seen in and it can't always be proven think about this. If you are consistent in your faith in your family through elementary school and then you get into middle school with your kids and they hit hit that thirteen year old age. Let's just call it what it is. It's cray cray. Thirteen is the craziest age ever thinking. What did i do wrong because now everything i've shown them seems to be thrown out the window or in my face or or i can't do anything right as a parent and don't take a personal but to be faithful through the time the message you shared a growing up to this time the message you're gonna share as they move through those on those chaotic ages of life though the middle school and high school time so the context of faith love the lord your god love your family be consistent. I think that's the biggest thing don't try to then do a mass of course change because you now have a toll thirteen fourteen fourteen year old. You've got just simply be faithful through your processes work to his point continue to raise a child up on the way they should go when they're old all they will not depart from it. Noticing that scripture doesn't say in the middle it says when they're old if you were to add to that which we're not going to raise a child up when they're middle school go crazy and then they'll come back around but the reality is this is a tough time so the faith component in the family is consistency. Yeah i like that and <hes> that's probably the best way approach faith. Is that consistency so your kids see it right and they may not always follow it. I guess is my point. I mean your boys. These are doing well. It seems and there are families where there's going to be struggle and john <hes> you know you home. Schooled your kids so that's a whole different environment but when and you're young people are in public school you're being exposed to a lot of things that maybe your faith contradicts what about that component with friends and what were some of the the drama aspects of your junior high years one thing we saw as.
"middle school" Discussed on Focus On the Family Daily Broadcast
"Mr kylie he can. It's totally legal. Bring your bible to school. Day is coming up thursday october third learn more by visiting. Bring your bible dot org. That's bring your bible dot o._r._g. Bring it sherry lift. Finding trusted faith-building entertainment for your kids is easy with the adventures in odyssey club. It's an online community with almost every episode ever and focus the family clubhouse magazine subscription a._o. Club dot org slash radio. I'm getting ready to start middle school and i'm worried that i won't have have any friends. When i first started school. I was nervous but excited at the same time. I'm also worried about getting around because a much bigger your school was worried about being bullied or walker not opening in gym class and a little worried about the classes and how they'll be hard on me. This has helped the incoming sixth graders. I'm excited about being an incoming sixth grader because i feel more grown up well. Middle school is a time of transition. I think i heard the word worry in there at least seven or eight times. There's a lot to worry about <hes> when you move from elementary school to middle school to junior high in we're going to ease some of those fears today on focus on the family. Your host is focused president and author through jim daly and i'm john fuller john. I can remember when.
"middle school" Discussed on KFC Radio
"I'm like, I'm not even at war. But I feel like a die, right? He's like he's like he's just trying to picture about being at war. Iveta turn this corner. And I know there are bad guys there, but I gotta turn this corner. But what am I gonna do video day? If I hit seven times, I might lose. I might get down and ten percent life. I'll have the duck for a little while in real life. It's just like that. Yeah. You got. Beaches in Normandy, man. This is like. Yeah. You gotta like somehow get over that fucking very very, very fortified beach. How are we going to do that? I don't know what you're send a bungee at the same time crazies worked. So how is nuts? I mean, the lining up is the craziest thing in the whole. Yeah. That was the Bill that was just like, well, our muskets can reach. So like ten feet from each other. The best plan was just like. Yes. Issues to fucking roll up with the drums. Little boy is there. Yeah. In fucking behead bandaged up to teach that kid addition. What are you doing having him lead you into war Dix this crazy topic number six six this is fun? I will tell you. We'll we'll tell you. This is from Casey Casey was the first person to say, what's it for and? I need a random topic. I five people just settle did it. Yeah. Said a topic. I five people all guys get the number six chicks. What do you need it for? Gig as he's go over number seven, marina, what's it for unbelievable damn hose? How about how about number two then? Number two. Why p middle school? Middle school middle. School was good for me middle schools are good time. Why that was we had just moved to Westchester. And I saw Pete. No, what do you need? Just looking answers. They're still still more about a Pete. That's fine. Fucking this guy house the internet doing people. Not good. All indications are failure. Middle school was a good time. For me. We had just moved from the Bronx to Westchester. And there was like some clout came along with that people live in the Bronx. And I was like I'm from city island dude by we fucking sail boats, and like play on the beach, but people like the Bronx. So he's checked like me and shit. I was gonna say it was because the ninth grade girls all had a crush on. Yeah. That that worked out. Well, that was good. The ninth grade girls that's middle school, buddy. Exactly. A middle. School is good for me. It was good with high school girls. Like, you middle school is the first time, I realized that I don't I don't even know what I would call it. Whether it's like like like, whether it would be white privilege or just being like, how athletes have it better or I guess not being poor all three of them really came into play where I should have been like expelled. It will you at that point. Are you living like boarding school? No, no, no. No, no. But the, but like I went to public middle school in my town, and everyone there was kind of a piece of shit. But I wasn't and debatable. I wasn't. But I panicked. The kid one day in gym glass. And I didn't know it was going to go all out. Dick out you got everything. Did he did he not have underwear on? Or you got the underwear to the gym. So he's an athletic shorts. I don't know, but it all came down. So as little fuck middle school pecker slots out, and he pulled it up real quick. But the the middle school the gym all bald eagle now he was like, a family friend. So he's like so mad at me. He's like he's like, I got a kick. We can expel for this like this is really bad. And I was like can we just not? And we just don't do. Like, it was like a free throw content, and that's me in middle school. I honestly I forget on the next addition of the one thing I.