20 Episode results for "Unkindness"

Episode 446, recorded 2020-06-09

Blue Lotus Buddhist Temple Podcast

25:14 min | 11 months ago

Episode 446, recorded 2020-06-09

"Good morning it's Wema way, Molo, Bhikhuni or Iowa Mala or just speaking. And I'd like to join you this warning. To stay to beautiful day here. Really feeling summer. but we're also feeling. If you're like me Lewis. This is an up and down time. And our practice so important. To help us find the middle through that up and down. So as things go up and down, and depending on how involved you are with? The being out in In regular would. Is this normal? I don't think we're normal yet. Maybe we never will be or never were, but I. Don't know how much you're out and about I'm still staying in. I could go to the grocery store when I need to, but. It's it feels better to stay in and continue with A. Zoom classes and. Being in touch with people in different ways than Than getting together, usual ways, I'm staying abreast of the protest in the politics today I know. There's a funeral in Houston where I grew up where I was born. So my hometown and I think a lot about Houston and growing up there. And it was always imagine it had always been a very difficult place for people of Color to live in. And I could see that even as a child and. Then now I see it as an incredibly cosmopolitan city. But the people there, so many marginalized people and people who are not part of that. Wealth and abundance in Houston. Lots of people on the streets. And lots of success lots of money other places, but lots of poverty in lots of. An unjust things going on. So you, you see in so many different immigrant communities, success and more acceptance, and then you see a lot of times in the black community, so there's a lot there's still. A lot of poverty so. Injustices everywhere. You know even in our own towns. So. This world is challenging us right now and I think that's. That's. Good for us to see how we're handling it. I wanted to just mostly. Sit with you today because I think. The biggest challenge for us right now is to know. His to know what to say is to know how to be in discussions is to know. What kind of action to take, and so I think we have to really double down on our practice. And, that practice might be when you're washing the dishes or when you're doing laundry. It needs to be. Time that you commit to. Heading your thoughts, not carry you away, but to be with your breath and to be in silence. and to allow yourself to breathe. Into meditate while you're doing the most. Of Things. we have to keep keep your mind in that quiet place. So you know what you need to say next, so you know. You know how to answer. Questions from a place of love instead of hate. In in from a place of kindness, instead of. Unkindness. and. We need to be thoughtful in. How were thinking and we need to be reflective. Of our own lives and of our own choices in our own. Of of the places where we? We can look around and see how we're spending our lives. Think of how you spend the most time. And what you what you think about the most. Are. You thinking about things you want. Are you being fearful about money? Are you being angry a lot? It's really time to really look at that and see that. Yeah on! Someone's writing right now. Saying their mom is near death. They're in the hospital. So in the midst of all of this we have these. Deep tragedies going on in our life. Sometimes, we're not even able to be with those people. We love at the time of death. So. Life is going on no matter how much we want to stand still right, and that's what I'm. That's what I know we have to focus on. Life is going on. We can't. We can't back away from it, so we have to know how to be in it and half to respond and I think that's where meditation comes in and can be an asset to us into all of our loved ones. And I think what happens when we begin to spend that time. Looking at our own minds. that. UNLESS, we're doing the wrong way. The people around us will be benefited. They will see the benefits. They'll see us changing cs becoming calmer, maybe more reasonable, more thoughtful. Easier to talk to. And when they see that from it makes them relax around us. They feel better around us. And we don't need to be telling them Oh. You've got you know you've gotta be like me and try this meditation stuff. We don't have to do that because our. Our lives will be the example that we want to be. And that that if they if that. If they're interested in that they'll. They'll follow up on it. But we want to be like little candles out there. You know lighting up the world, but we do it through our behavior and our actions and our words. We don't need to do it by. Trying to convert anybody or trying to change anyone's mind. So. If you're going through something very personal and very tragic. Be With yourself as much as you can today. Sending Meta. To that loved one. Sending peace to that person. Or, those people. If you have your own. Issues of life and death going on right now. This is a pretty powerful day. I would say just to be in this world, and they have it compounded with your own something from your own very close. Within your family or a very close friend? then. That's just compounding it, so this may be a more important time for you to try to be with your with your breath. With your kindness with your love. and. We're all we'll all make it when we are the other dead or alive. We'll make it through this through this journey. So. Think about all the people now who are suffering in this world. and. Let's we can. We can begin with ourselves. When we practice match up because we need to be sure that we're including ourselves in the. People, in the world, human beings all going through this. Difficult time and every day. Some all of most of us are going through difficult times. And in the middle of those difficult times we may have incredibly wonderful things happening and we may feel guilty about that. So, don't feel guilty if you're experiencing joy and happiness because we need that. And we need to be seeing your joy and being able to be happy for for you and. We don't need to be hiding anything. So. Let's sit I. think my message is getting a little confused because I'm just. There's so much going on in my head. So that's a good time to sit so. To all of you who are watching and who may see this at some point? This. This practice that we do can keep us always knowing to find balance in our lives, the practice itself can help us balance. Will always be caught up in the ups and the downs, but our path is to find balance in the midst of that. It's not to give up on joy and happiness. It's not to embrace suffering at all. It's to find balance in this world because as we can see just. All around us right now we can have better examples. There's there's no balance and what we have to do is find that. And know how to come back to that place a balance in the midst of any conversation you have today. Remember to breathe and to be thoughtful and to be kind. Don't add to the hate in the world. Don't add to the suffering. Remember, loving kindness and renunciation. And harmlessness. That should be our resolve our intention for every day. Okay. So now. I'm sure you're all in the. Posture that you want to be an are, you may be walking and listening to me. Be relaxed. If you're not walking. You can close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose. Her hand beyond your belly. So, you can feel that those those arrests are getting down into your belly. Not by any deep exertion, but you WanNa, let it get down below the top of your lungs and your throat. So you just allowing your breath to go down. Making your belly. No force. or All relearning how to breathe? Very good. Aware of your body breathing. He inhale. Indeed exile! Be Grateful. To the earth. Takes in everything that we spill out onto it. It takes in all of our garbage and all of our. Polluted air and it takes in all of the mistakes that we make and still is here beneath our feet. Allowing us to live. Be Grateful to the people who gave life to your parents. Be grateful for the law firm surrounds you. Be Grateful for the ones you love. May I be well. Content. At peace. May I be free from fear? Free from. Anxiety free from worry. You, wear of how good it feels. To settle. Settled down to be quiet. To allow the thoughts just to come in. Go the to stay with your breath. So. Many people in this country. Are Sick and can't breathe or they're angry can't breathe. Rather sad. And cannot pre. Breath is the anchor of our practice because it's. Because it's there. Because it reminds us, we are alive. And there's much to do. No time to lose. Now think of your loved ones. Your family members the people you love. Who you consider your extended family? Think of them. See the different people in this this group. The Meta. Me All. My loved ones it well. Maybe content may be peace. If you have a loved one who is dying. Who is near death? Thank them. Help them be calm. Let your own thoughts. Be Calm. Help them with your this help. Them become calm at the time of their death. Her. They may need to be calm if they're sick can just need to be breathing and be at peace with whatever is. Someone is nearing death. Being peaceful and calm is the. His the best way for them to pass. Without, confusion Without fear. Keeping your loved ones in mind, but now if you're ready to. We can move out to different people. The people who are more. Just acquaintances people. We may see every day. People, we may see if we go to the grocery store or If. They're our neighbors. People who may be in touch with who are in groups that we belong to? Send out this same piece the same matter. This loving care is goodwill out to all of these acquaintances. Maybe to all your friends on Facebook, all the people in your church or your temple are all the people in the soon classes that you attend. May All of these people? Who have had some encounter with? who were meaningful to me? Who are in a world that I connect with? May they all be well. May All be content in me. The all beef feeling safe. May Be at peace. Even if they are marching in the streets. Even if they're being peaceful protesters. Help them be peace in their hearts. Help them stay with a mind of peace. Speech of peace and their bodies, so he's. And now out to all beings in the world in this planetary system in this world. Beings we can't see beings invisible to us. Other human beings, all creatures and animals. All beings being born and all beings dying. We. All beings free from suffering and its causes. Free from fear and worry anxiety. Free From Hunger and thirst. And the extremes of the weather. Beings able to care for themselves or have? Have Care provided for them lovingly. And all living beings. Be Able to live in peace. Sprees. With Feel the quality goodwill goodwill, loving kindness. Friendliness. Allow it to shower down on you. At the same time you're radiating out. And it's boundless. It's endless. Carry this feeling for the rest of your day. And they you sleep well tonight. If your heart is heavy. Who are you feeling? At that point of not knowing what to do, and it's hard to sleep practice Meta. Just focus on your breathing. Try to let the thoughts fall away. If you really have to worry. It could time. Give Yourself fifteen twenty minutes in worry. Worry worry. But don't do that before you go to bed. Do it when you can be by yourself. Put a timer on. Leftist practice of Meta. Be How you find you balance. Speed with all of you and have a beautiful beautiful day. And find something that can give you two way and fill your heart with gratitude. Something or someone okay, thank you very much. For being part of my practice. And for being something have great gratitude towards. Thank you. See Thursday!

Houston Lewis Wema Iowa Bhikhuni Facebook Unkindness. fifteen twenty minutes
A Reflection on Kindness

The Bluestocking Baptists

17:23 min | 1 year ago

A Reflection on Kindness

"<music> Hi ladies welcome to the Blue Stocking Baptists podcast. My name is Hannah Oliver and my co host is Esther Faulkner as her and I are both particular Baptists who hold to the sixteen eighty nine London Baptist confession of faith the blue stocking baptists podcast is an an informal podcast for women with intelligent and literary interests related to Christian doctrine and life esther and I both have a passion to see unbelievers come to the faith and so we hope our material will be used for the furtherance of God's Kingdom we also have have a passion for equipping women with the tools they need to exercise discernment and we desire to see more women understand and love the deep theology that is found in God's word. Unfortunately Ester is not with me today as her joey are finishing dishing up their classes and will be returning home soon. I haven't had a lot of opportunities to talk with her since she's been gone. She's been really busy and I've been really busy with some different projects. <hes> I actually got a new job and I've just been dealing with medical stuff in our family so I was actually considering skipping our second June episode because life is been a little bit overwhelming as you can imagine but I actually have been pondering a lot about my own conduct as a Christian woman and kindness is something that has really been difficult for me me during this season of my life. I'm definitely not an expert on the topic of kindness and my preparation for this episode is simply my own Personal Bible reading on the subject I haven't read any commentaries or consulted any books on the subject so this episode is simply just a feeble reflection on kindness that I hope will bless others. This episode won't be Super Long but I will be sharing a lot of verses on kindness and it's ultimately my hope that scripture will stern us all repentance as we let the word of God instruct us and Godliness. I don't have any other resources to provide other than the scripture versus that I'll be reading but the Bible does have a great deal to say about kindness and I personally need to be reminded of how to behave as a Christian and if I need to be reminded to be kind I can imagine many of our listeners would also benefit as well so before I start I just want to be transparent with my own struggle against unkindness and meanness I in my own home towards my husband and daughters and second towards those in the household of God. I've been wrestling with a situation that happened a few weeks ago and I've been really struggling with anger and a desire to be mean and say mean things about a specific person because I feel very wronged and I've been reflecting a great deal the past couple of weeks on my own. facebook usage and how I let unkindness creep into some of my interactions. There've been times many times when I've been snarky rude shore lacking patients and quick to respond before listening resulting in lack of kindness and understanding being extended to the other person I'm not commonly outright mean but if Asians four twenty nine let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths but only such as is good for building up as fits the occasion that it may give grace to those who here has been weighing on my heart heart so the kind of the Holy Spirit has been directing me in a more holy direction and revealing how I've allowed certain behaviors to go unchecked because others around me were acting in a similar manner. It's really easy to see a mean joke. I mean mean mean comment and automatically laugh or joining an it is so easy to click the left button on facebook. When we think someone is being stupid or we disagree? These types of things can actually be really mean and if you've ever been on the receiving end you should know that it hurts it is much easier to extend kindness when you're face face to face with someone but not always the temptation to snap at the checkout clerk at the grocery store because she's being slow or the temptation to scoff when someone makes a comment about how many children we have or about our parenting or about how we do do not have children and they are making comments to us or at us that are hurtful and mean. We don't always want to offer kind response. When someone is rude to us we normally want to be angry or irritated or rude back and in some cases being marriage to someone who is rude is often encouraged even in Christian circles we feel justified in our behavior because we have felt wronged and we need to pause and think before we speak we need to have kindness on our lips and love in our hearts for our neighbors? Even when it's it's difficult or we don't think they deserve it so I'm definitely not saying Oh look at me. I have killed this little devil of unkindness in me because I am so far from being a master of kindness to other people people I am saying that I do sympathize with others who also really struggle with unkindness and who see the goodness of the Lord's commands and desire to be shaped by his word I personally rest in the Gospel for my assurance knowing that the Lord has done it all that I'm secure in the Lord and and I also recognize that I'm a saint who still sins we as Christian women who are justified must ask the practical question. How are we to live and our Lord instructs us to be kind so kindness is a fruit of the spirit that is an out flowing characteristic that grows out of love if we claim to be loving than we should also be kind because the two are connected Galatian five twenty two through twenty six says but the fruit of the spirit is love joy peace patience kindness goodness faithfulness gentleness? <unk> self control against such things there is no law and those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the spirit let us also keep in step with the spirit let us not become conceited provoking one another envying one another other another verse Corinthians Thirteen four through seven which is which is considered the famous love chapter tells us that love is patient and kind love does not envy or boast it is not arrogant or rude it does not insist on its own way it is not irritable resentful. It does not rejoice it wrongdoing but rejoices with truth love bears all things believes all things hopes all things endures all things both these verses make mention of kindness but they also show us other characteristics that are fitting for the believer. The krantz passage is actually really convicting for me. Personally I think when we normally read this passage we romanticize it but we don't ever really compare ourselves to it. We think Oh what a beautiful verse love is so amazing you hear people reading adult weddings and promising to be these things and we always fall so very short. I think it's important that we need to read that verse and ask the Question Am I can see. Do I insist on my own way. Am I e rtable resentful. Many of these things I wrestle with daily and yet I also see the the kindness of the Lord and revealing my weakness so that I can boast in Christ. I see my need for my savior and I'm continually turning away from my son with the help of the Holy Spirit. I think it's really important that we define kindness. Kindness is a noun it is the quality of being friendly generous or considerate. Some synonyms are kindly nece kindheartedness warm heartedness tender heartedness goodwill affection warmth gentleness tenderness concern care consideration consideration helpfulness thoughtfulness unselfishness altruism compassion sympathy understanding benevolence friendliness neighborliness hospitality generosity patience tolerance since charitableness graciousness humaneness mercifulness decency and that's a lot of synonyms but I do think it gives you a really good picture of what kindness is and it can be so many different things I mean it it is not harsh or cruel or rude or snarky. It is not an loving I mean the sentiment synonyms really give you a good idea of all the ways in which kindness can take jake form and so some scriptures that command kindness include titus two four through five it says in so train the young women to love their husbands and children to be self controlled pure working at home kind and submissive to their own husbands that the word of God may not be reviled Hebrews thirteen to says do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Mica six eight says he has told you oh man what. This good and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice and to love kindness into walk humbly with your God Colossians two twelve hundred fifteen says put on then as God's Chosen Ones Holy and beloved compassionate hearts kindness humility meekness impatience bearing with one another and if one has a complaint against another forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you so so you also must forgive and and above all these put on love which binds everything together in perfect harmony and let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts to which indeed you were called in one body and be thankful kindness something that we put on according to Colossians it is something we are trained in according to titus it is something that is good. According to Mica it is something that we should not neglect. According to Hebrews kindness is something that we cultivate in our lives through the instruction section of the word of God and the working of the Holy Spirit and US practically we need to ask what kindness looks like so Matthew Twenty five thirty four through thirty six says then the king will say to those on his right come you who are we're blessed by my father inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world for I was hungry and you gave me food. I was thirsty and you gave me drink. I was a stranger and you welcomed me. I was naked and you clothed me. I was sick and you visited me. I was in prison prison and you came to me. Ax Twenty eight to says the native people showed US unusual kindness for the kindle the fire and welcomed us all because it begun it had begun to rain and was cold. I Timothy Five ten says and having a reputation station for good works if she has brought up children has shown hospitality as washed the feet of the saints has cared for the afflicted and has devoted herself to every good work Romans Twelve fifteen says rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn these versus show us that kindness looks like weeping with those who weep and morning with those who mourn and proper season kindnesses doing good when you see a need you care for people you extend what you have generously and with a heart of love when someone is harsh you respond with goodness and gentleness list it is showing hospitality caring for needs devoting ourselves to good works. It looks like warming afire and showing compassion kindness can be many things because kindness flows out of love for our neighbor and love for God when we are seeking to love our neighbor kindness Dennis will be present. The wisdom of kindness can also be found in many of the proverbs a few included proverbs eleven seventeen which says a man who is kind benefits himself but a cruel man hurts himself. We see in this first. That kindness is a sensible thing that can benefit us all as well as others. Those who are rude harsh unloving uncaring and uncaring hurt themselves both spiritually and socially as people do not want to be around someone who is cruel proverbs thirty one twenty six says she opens her mouth with wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue proverbs thirty one is filled with so much wisdom and how to live a godly life and we all know that we fail to be that quote proverbs thirty one woman however just because we fail to meet the expectation of wise living does not mean that we cannot learn from the passage or apply to our lives. Kindness is something that we teach to others. This shows us that wise women share the instruction of scripture with others others they teach others what it means to be kind and it rolls off of Their Lips Titus also echoes the same idea as Christians. We are to strive to live do and teach kindness to those around us we also need to ask. How do we respond when others are not kind to us? I Peter Three nine tells us finally all of you have unity of mind sympathy brotherly love a tender heart a humble mind do not repay evil for evil Evola reviling for reviling but on the contrary bless for to this you are called that you may obtain a blessing I peter four eight thousand nine says above all keep loving one another earnestly since love covers rivers and multitude of sins show hospitality to one another without grumbling Colossians three thirteen says bear with each other and forgive one another. If any of you has a grievance against someone forgive as the Lord forgave you these versus show us that we are blessed not curse to have unity sympathy love kindness and a humble mind we are to let love cover over a multitude of sins and to forgive those who've sent against us. What do we do? If we've been unkind. We confess our sins first John One nine through ten says if we confess our sins he is faithful and just will forgive us of our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not send we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us. We need to return to the Gospel again and again. We remember that the Lord has shed his blood for us and imputed his righteousness to us. We are to rest in that and then repent turn from our sins and and strive towards godly living. We remember that the Lord is kind to us. He forgives us in loves us. Some verses that we can meditate on that. Remind us of the Lord's kindness towards us are luke six thirty five which says but. Love your enemies do good to them and lend to them without expecting to get anything back then you're award will be great and you will be children of the most high because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked Equations to seven says an order that in the coming coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus and Lastly Titus Three four tells us to speak evil of no one to avoid quarreling rolling to be gentle and to show perfect courtesy towards all people for we ourselves were once foolish disobedient led astray slaves to various passions and pleasures passing our days in malice envy hated by others and hating one another but when the goodness goodness and loving kindness of our God and savior appeared he saved us not because of works done by us in righteousness but according to his own mercy by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit whom he poured out on US richly only through Christ Jesus our savior so that being justified by His grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life the saying is trustworthy and I want you to insist on these things so that those who have believed in God may may be careful to devote themselves to good works. These things are excellent and profitable for people. I just want you to remember that Christ has saved us and he has sanctifying us an in this weekend. Rejoice we can see the kindness of the Lord towards us and we should also walk in his ways and be kind to others. I hope that you feel both convicted and encouraged. I hope that this episode has stirred in you a desire to learn more about what godly kindness looks like I am praying that the Lord will reveal to all of us are unkindness into purge us of it just as a reminder Estrin. I believe that everyone is a theologian and you're either a good one or a bad one. Our hope with our podcast is to stern women a love for good theology in to encourage courage women in their faith as they walk in obedience and grow in holiness. We want to remind everyone that our podcast is only a tool and is not church and it does not replace discipleship we encourage all of our listeners to find a local church and become a member we have of resources on our website for those who are seeking church you can email us at the blue stocking baptists at gmail.com or find us on facebook at the blue stocking baptists or twitter at she baptists. We also have a Patriot if you would like to support our ministry industry financially and please be praying for her and her husband as they travel home. Please also be praying that they will meet their financial goals so that they can be sent to Ecuador according to schedule. Thank you for joining me today and let us remember first. John Four eleven beloved. If God sell left us we also ought to love one another God thus ladies and have a good day.

Holy Spirit US facebook Blue Stocking Baptists Esther Faulkner unkindness Ester Hannah Oliver Ecuador titus John Four jake Peter Three Matthew Twenty Dennis John One luke
OnEducation Presents: Dig It or Ditch It? w/ Noah Geisel

OnEducation

38:43 min | 1 year ago

OnEducation Presents: Dig It or Ditch It? w/ Noah Geisel

"The presenting sponsor for on education is class craft. We're excited to announce class new story mode. Which makes it easy for educators to harness the power of stories episodes? One and two of season are ready for you and your students play today. And it's completely free to learn more about class craft and the new story mode simply visit fast craft dot com slash on education. That actually pisses assist me. I get like Glenn Tells gleese climbing down off the wall because I'm going after people all right everybody. Welcome to this month's episode sewed of dig it or digit. This is your hottest or at least lukewarm takes on education and everything else. What's going on in the world with our best? Friend Noah geisel welcome Noah. Hey guys so great to be with you for. What I'm guessing is our last ditch of twenty twenty? I guess that is I. Guess it's it is it is it. It was a good year though. Great Year has take yes so so the tell tell the way it goes. No how does how does this. All work digger ditch. It works like this. y'All I put out a topic and Mike and Glenn Riff on it Beginning with whether they are digging or ditching that topic and we're GONNA roll right in with a quote from one of my favorite people on twitter at Sonny Brown S. U. N.. An Eye Brown and it is unkindness comes from certainty. Unkindness comes from certainty. Gosh that's going to do it. I got it I got it. I'm ditching I think very certain of you Mike. Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah. I know I'm here for it now. unkindness comes from certainty. I have to say that a lot of I. I like the phrasing and I'm trying to kind of wrap my head around the the actual context. I think is is a little bit missing in this case but I find that a lot of people. When they're unkind I also would have missed misplaced? Certainty may be as the word. I want to The Way I wanNA frame it where they think they know what the the hell they're talking about. But they actually don't know what the hell they're talking about. And they're certain in that it's also it goes along with that whole phenomenon of of people who aren't very smart. Always have this like over inflated sense of their brilliance. That's I I can't remember the word for it but there's like this this attribute that people like Donald Trump for example would have where you know. He thinks he's an absolute genius. And we all know is an absolute train wreck right. But that's that's kind of the same thing where where I mean. But he's obviously so unkind and he's obviously so Not a good person at all Yet completely certain of his abilities and the you know his statements eight minutes and facts. I think he might be actually a really good Example of unkindness. You know coming from certainty You know so so. Yeah let's let's ditch it because I think that that's That's a bad trait to have For sure the the The statement itself as Mike circled around that whole entire thing actually was really good for me to flesh out what I was actually thinking about out. The statement itself is actually. I guess I'm GONNA DIG it. What Mike is Actually saying though I totally agree with him is just? Because you're certain in about something doesn't mean that you have to like throw down the gauntlet on everybody else. And that's I think this is where we're at right now now especially in the United States as far as our our our interactions with each other and it doesn't even matter what topic especially regarding politics but my goodness you can just read it. You can spread it out anything now. It's really hard to have you know when people used to say okay the topic's around the dinner table with your family or friends France should do. You should just not bring up. That list of topics is now so gigantic that we can't it's very difficult difficult to have discourse and to have a middle ground to have have someone stated opinion that or a certainty even of something that they totally believe even and then us go. You know I don't totally agree with that but I'm not going to like burn you because of that. You know that Kinda think thank you know. It's it's this whole thing that's now missing completely. There is no kind of I think I had a principal. One Time tell me sometimes we're GONNA agree to disagree. That's thing is you can throw out the window. No such thing as that in a lot of our discourse anymore and that sucks walks because that's limiting our ability to basically do great things were. It's easier for people to manipulate us and is not even just talking about on right weighing whatever my because you know we're Mike and I are like basically left wingers. Whatever might be talking about on either end? We could be easily manipulated hip related towards one end with easy statements. And I think we've talked about this before on on digital digit. Just this discourse. And how it's it's led down this slighted. I hope that we can just cut a break away from night. We really kind of need a leader. Whoever they ended up being especially in the United States stepping into this role as president to really Kinda that that is true that unification of both sides equipped burning the people who think the certain way or this way and really bring us together towards like doing positive things? Yeah I it's interesting that I kind of feel like you do Glenn that Mike and and all three of us I think are kind of on the same page but maybe my wording of how I put it out. There was a little weird because I'm also digging this quake when I saw her. Put that out there Along with her disdain. Think about it and it made me think that yeah way how much cruelty comes from a scene something and just having a hot take it Of jumping right to a place of certainty of knowing what this person you means by and where they're going by and that you know when when we look at people who maybe instead of firing back with the heartache say tell me more about that is is that a road the is a weed too much kinder places. there's a point I occasionally. Let's do called conversations with people who hate me along that I got listen to that. That's a really good. That's really good premise. Season one was gray Ed. In particular where the host it goes through their youtube comments and the people who say is the most vile and vitriolic things the host reaches out to them and says hey And sin talking about this and and so interesting because the these conversations are so civil and they're so kind even though oh their entire. The whole conversation is rooted around. So you said you hope I get around to to you. Know whatever right tighten it for me brings home. Certainty is just a place that it's just on the opposite end of the spectrum of of humility. I guess and then when we can be more humble were probably helping More kind things come out and with that said I'm going to mix exit up for you. Know our our last digger ditch between nineteen helping into a site slightly less hot take take place and that's instead making thank you dig our ditch. We're going to do our remaining topics on underrated or overrated. Oh underrated or overrated rated. Okay and what do you mean by this new rules new rules for this when you're not saying whether you like it or dislike it you're saying like based on where you think the society currently is at. Do you think that this idea is overrated underrated underrated and so in other words. If it's underrated you'd be buying stock in it because it's it's all right. Does it down. Okay I got you. Hey Glenn gets go. I all right Lynn. Go first. overrated underrated The value of people of color giving keynotes since we're in conference conference season. Oh my goodness well that's a softball. I WANNA make sure I'm saying it. The right way so underrated would be. I'm betting on Warp your best you than what is currently out there. That is is so is hot as nicer right near where it will be so underrated and I. Don't I hope that soon. That the organizers of these conferences. Like you know a you do this and I know you do this. Specifically as far as reaching out at tried to pull so in a diverse whoever by presenters or they might be keynotes givers whatever might be You really dig deep beyond the the. Let's just calm the obvious people at the top. You know what I mean that there's so many more diverse voices out there on a variety. Variety of difference. Diversity is bolted to. It's not just racial multi diversity that could be that could really strike home for all of us as educators and then we can pass that on. Obviously whatever happens as far as the inspiration. Those things that happened in keynotes pass it on obviously to our students so super underrated. I think that the organizers of the of all of these events need to be digging deeper deeper beyond that peripheral top. 'cause it's super easy. I think it's super easy to see kind of this. I don't even organize events at could pick out the top one percent of whoever might be and there are some diverse people in that but it's very You'll and we could definitely do better. I I also think it's incredibly underrated There is there's just so much experience life experience not even teaching experience but but also teaching experience that other people have that I just don't have and that you just don't have in and the voices cases of these people just haven't been Shared as much as they should be. And that's why for example I I'm a giant giant fan of of Michael Bonner's actually a really good example of someone that's getting the attention he deserves Not just for the great work. He's doing now but his his lived. Experience is an incredible story and to be honest I share as much as I mean cleanse life experiences and incredible story that more people need to hear and and and I can't wait to see the days when Glenn shares his story with more and more people And even though you know it's funny because we've actually had some really interesting conversations with people on twitter. They don't even realize that Glenda Latino and that actually pisses me I get like Glenn tells we climbing me down off the wall because I'm going after other people because it pisses me off to be honest because they they obviously haven't listened to Glenn and they don't know Glenn Story and they don't know us and they don't know me and and so they they don't know that we talk about this stuff all the time And by you know I can't wait to see and hear the stories of of so many of these educators working in in communities of color and minority communities because I think that we all have something to to learn from them and So it's it's great that that people are starting to think about and making sure that their those was voice are being being heard a lot more. I think that this were making progress. And it's exciting. I'm lovin yawns takes on this You know I I know Glenn started out saying he was a softball that you know. I think that it is a very hot topic right now. In something that is at the forefront of a lot of people's minds and so that's that's what I thought. It might be an intriguing tie because I think it is very highly valued right now and more and more people are realizing and I think that it is also still hugely underrated. I think is highly values as it is nowhere near where it will be And you know all you need to do is go to a conference that has somebody WHO's not like Amira might make give a keynote. Thanks so much to everybody who brings me in and when you have you know folks who aren't you have this whole giant constituent severe ten dis. who were then you know waiting in line thirty minutes afterwards to speak to a presenter because for once they saw themselves reflected on stage trying? Yeah and I. I think that you know it shouldn't be for once. It should be all the time and and until it is. This'll be I think a topic that I'm agreeing with you. Guys would be underrated rated next up the notion that education today is failing overrated or underrated. Do you WanNa go first Mike on that but I will okay. The notion that education is failing. Wow this is a tough one boy. Oh boy let's let's go with overrated. But I'M NOT GONNA say it's significantly overrated to be honest I think that there there are amazing. People doing amazing work there. Are Things going on in education that I feel like as my personal personal kind of community has grown. And I'm meeting New People all the time. I'm certainly more optimistic. Now than I've ever urban about the state of education to be honest because I'm seeing a lot more than I've ever seen. I'm traveling all over. Frankly all over the world I just came back from China and saw amazing things there. And I'm seeing amazing things in Vancouver and Halifax Nova Scotian and in in Newfoundland land where my my co workers are doing minecraft sessions just today and tomorrow and I'm seeing this. We're about to go to Minnesota and I have no doubt we're going to see people doing amazing things there as well and so the more I've gotten out and met people I I'm actually a AH way more positive about the state of education than probably I've ever been that being said I think it's fair to say there's still lots of work to to do especially on the political front especially on the funding and the where the money is in teacher pay and the things like that. There's there's a lot of a failure there I think that what is Predominantly my feeling now. Is that teachers are rising above the hands that they're given all all the time especially in the United States and doing amazing things with the resources the very limited resources that they have and rising using above the challenges that they've been given you know in in these communities and with these with this. The daily struggle of bathrooms breath rooms that aren't functioning and walls. That are crumbling. And you know all of this we can talk about all of that stuff and we should talk about all of that stuff and this podcast cast is very focused on talking about a lot of that stuff but to suggest that education is failing because of a lot of that stuff I think is simply untrue. I would also say that I agree with Mike that it's overrated and the and the way that that statement is used as far as education as failing link it has been used as as political propaganda basically against public education. It's easy then to go ahead and just is basically throw out. This statement of like saying education is failing in. This is how we're going to measure that and that's really the key is like okay. It's failing but according to what measure you know. Whatever might be well? The measure has consistently been High stakes standardized test scores and these high stakes standardized tests. We found many times are written for specific type of audience. We just finished talking about what kind of it's not. The kids that are actually in. Our classrooms is specific specific. Kind of student. It's a white student in a Upper middle class neighborhood or above that's has specific context wchs in their life that the tests are written for it. We're going to measure them on that but the statements why would you ever state that. As far as education is failing was a politician. Were as someone trying to make a political movement or even as a textbook company. I might throw them out there to the reason why you would do. This is to who basically sell something else. So what is that something that other vision other thing. Whatever it might be well we need to improve? Our schools is called. We need to standardize education. We need to make sure we start pinpointing these things. I'm going to sell you. This product to make sure you can go ahead and meet those specific things. Whatever measuring and politicians? A lot of of them are selling this vision of public schools suck and therefore there's these other options that are way better. We should be helping the subsidize. Those things we're we're talking about whether they be charter school visions or Private schools especially whatever. It might be that. This decision is for this other thing. That's actually happening. And we all know that. That's part of the propaganda that statement. That's reason why would say that's the that is highly overrated. As far as saying education is failing. Yeah Yeah what is it. What is it that I remember? What mayor said Texaco Textbook Companies? Say they create the disease and then they sell you the cure Such a such a great line I'm with you if anybody's listening to Glenn Kinda go on his take their Nardin Auden along and snapping your fingers highly recommend jail Audrey waters most recent blog posts from a couple of weeks ago on her Hack learning website where she Shares the complete text of a talk she gave recently on agitprop agitation propaganda That very much aligns with everything. Gwen said. I won't spoil it for anybody. I'm with you guys. I think it's Dramatically overrated the notion that education today is failing honestly for me. It's for slightly different reasons though. I think that it's kind of rooted in real false nostalgia. the You know we we had it all figured out in the past you know what I mean and yes you what things I like to joke about is that you know and I can can go to an airport or whatever and see people of any age group get to the top of escalator and come to a complete stop right. Wake which is just the dumbest thing you can possibly do. If education new thing there's the false nostalgia and I also think that it's rooted in you know things like well back in the day especially as Glenn Point with historical inequities like it was okay. That school didn't work for a whole giant segment of our population. We had fifty percent graduation rates and so success was only based on the fifty percent. Who who did beg your right and That's no longer okay. In a lot of ways I think that makes us more successful than that. Were taken into greater counter people Next up guys. WE'RE GONNA turn from the past to the future whether hot topics right now. Especially in educational educational technology is going to be artificial. Intelligence overrated underrated educators understanding Of artificial intelligence. These are really good. Oh my God I actually I actually think okay so if I get. I'm have make sure that I actually put it on the right. They underrated educators understand of artificial intelligence. I think that educators in I would put myself off into this class to. I don't understand artificial intelligence enough and I need to understand it more. So does that make the overrated underrated. You think it is overrated. Yes so there is many of us that just don't like we hear the term. We know that there's some some significant impact but we don't even know how to actually explain it and when I hear people including politicians like Andrew Yang for for example Specifically explain the impact that artificial intelligence will have on our future Richard but not the distant future. We're talking about five to ten years from now. How impactful it will be on what the world looks like? Nick that wakes me up it goes I need to like learn more about this and then not only do I need to learn more about it. We need to start discussing discussing this in in our schools talking about what. What is the impact of this? And how does it impact education of course but the job market the job sectors. What we're going to be doing as far as in future years do we need to be worried or do we need to be like excited about it and then being able to go go ahead and move forward with that? That's I don't know if that's pro or against its but I do know that educators to to upskill upskill on their readiness for a yes that is how about you Mike. I think it's underrated I I think the Glenn Nailed the point that I I was GonNa Neyla. The future of work I think that I can easily see a world world in fifty years where The workforce is considerably smaller. The actual people doing labor is less. I think that Educators are are fairly safe in fact. There's been a lot of study about the future of education in terms of the actual labor late. The actual people doing work and You know education is one of those roles that seems to be less less affected by a automation than than a lot of other roles. But I mean there are whole industries that exists now that will be completely replaced by machines in the next twenty years A lot of transportation industries A A lot of Manual Labor industries are. I mean a lot of most manual labor is already replaced A lot of service industries So I mean I think the future of work in preparing so as far as it relates education the idea of preparing our students for a world world where the jobs like. I WANNA almost flip this narrative about the future jobs like twenty thirty whatever That that a a lot of people talk about and just just remind kids that the jobs that exist now made not exist in the future. Like I it's flipping that narrative just a a little bit in the sense that there's going to. There's people doing work now that those jobs aren't going to be available to our students 'cause they they won't need people doing them. I also think that there's some hidden opportunities in opportunities again that were because it's a it's say. Incredibly emerging field in space. There are things that we don't have even invented yet in in terms of ai that are going to provide some really interesting. I suspect are going to provide some really interesting opportunities for our kids And make their lives better. Hopefully anyways So I I think. I don't think I need educators especially like might eight might might listen my son's grades six teacher. I don't need her to to take a deep dive into a and go take like university courses and like I I. I think I'm because I think that that's a ridiculously unrealistic expectation. There are a great six teachers. That don't even know what flip grade is for God's sakes let alone trying to have them under wrap their heads around you know. Ai and machine learning but to have them understand that the future is uncertain and that the future of work is uncertain. And all we really know is that it's going to be predominantly a machine based I think is is fairly certain and something that we can prepare kids for in small ways as as they're going through school now now while and for anybody who didn't catch with did there where he slipped in the machine learning. I'm if you're saying they're listening to this thinking thinking I don I think I need to my understanding of that. That's a great place. Starters just kind of just a definition level of wrap your head around the difference between artificial intelligence and machine learning to things that definitely get lumped together. And if you don't know the difference that might be a great signed it on the understand avai place You're on one end of the bell. uh-huh curved complex. I'm going to go with Glenn on this Wednesday I think it's dramatically overrated on. I'm and I'm feeling a whole lot more urgent than Glenn I. I think that five years from now is is Not even close. I think it's already happening. I think it's GonNa be happy a whole lot more in two thousand twenty and it's going to be pretty close to ubiquitous by two thousand twenty one and I'm I'm I'm you guys because I'm seeing people who I respect you know tweet and Blah even blog about things. Educators need to know about artificial intelligence. And you know there's a lot of you know shiny stuff around yet things you can do to make your own Alexa commands and stuff right but something it's really missing is You know I think a grasp of the ethics and you know go and especially for back to Glens it's Kinda focused on the historical inequities and one of the key things about artificial intelligence. This is not borne And it's not it's not born intelligent. Aw did artificial intelligence learns a whole lot faster and with a whole lot. You know just zillions more. You know pieces of information than a human can taken taken it. Does this through training sets of data. And so we're looking in education space in. We're going to have a I. You know the data that is is training. The I'd recognize patterns is going to be historical data and historical data in any context but but we know real well in education is chock full of bias and so if we are not careful and really keeping a close eye on our ethics about this in cleaning up our data and checking it for bias than what we're doing is creating a really intelligent tool that has been completely trained up on you know biased information that can then be used as a very convenient and easy way to do things like data driven decision. Making this is what the data is telling us. Therefore this is a decision we need to make. And we're making that decision way. The only go to perpetuate the very worst of things that we've already done and ensure that we continue to do them so I think it is overrated and education educators understanding of AI. That we need to Start sounding some alarms if we're you know listeners. If you are in in conversations where people are excitedly talking about big data machine learning artificial intelligence and nobody's talking about using words I clean up the data or you know Talking about ethics than you know please the on education progress encourages you to be. The person stands at the foot down and says you know this this is going to keep me up at night and I hope it's keeping everybody else in this room at night and less were taken seriously. The equity piece is huge too. I was part of an interesting conversation. A couple of months ago about equity in programming careers You know making sure that there's there's not only women programmers and designers but but people of color as well because And and the way they framed it would the person who was speaking was super simple When there's equity in jobs there's equity in the programming and when you when you said that that machine machines are taught the the I is going to be taught by the programmers by people injecting code and information and data into these systems to allow them to learn if it's just a bunch of white dudes inputting? There's going to be blank spaces. There's going to be whole views in lenses. That aren't aren't that these machines won't see the world through because they're taught they're not It's not we're not. They're not like humans that can evolve and adopt Not In the same way anyways So I think that there's a whole all piece around equity and diversity in the careers now even because I think that those careers are going to frame our future and our future needs to be our machine learning needs to be diverse as well It's it's an absolutely fascinating compensate. He done so that it's a very easy. He kind of tangible thing to point at you know you both talked about jobs and human resources podcast. You're hearing ads right now for you. I WANNA promote any given company. You're hearing ads for companies. That are talking about. They're using AI. Right to help identify jobs and so again if we're feeding AI. Historical stoorikhel data. You know it doesn't know that maybe one of the reasons why it doesn't know that women historically took maternity leave a whole lot. The more often than men did right and so it. All of a sudden starts identifying you male candidates Over female candidates based off of you. You know kind of incomplete information that that's an on its face biased right Final question to take us out. Twenty twenty a underwriter overrated our spouses patients with us. I mean I just came back from two weeks away. My patients is incredibly underrated I it's funny. I was in the last day of my trip. I was in Vancouver so I I came back from. Hong Kong was in Vancouver for a couple of days doing Doing training out there and I sent my wife flowers on from Vancouver I. I called the flower shopping center flowers to her school because You know I won't even come close to making up for for for how. How how? How much work? She would have had to put up with. So that I could go to around South China for for a week and a half half I the the irony obviously is that I used to get complained to because I didn't work hard enough and now I I work work too hard. I've switched to the entire end of the spectrum and but both are a problem And my wife has now dealt with both sides of this equation which is incredible You Know Cheryl is Is is seeing think that that. I'm I'm I'm working really hard and trying to do some good work and so I can't appreciate Her patients in her effort More than I do do and even when I'm bad at articulating it. Hopefully she at least listens to this and understands this podcast. She she believe it or not. She does I actually I actually didn't think she'd be enough but she. She's has begun to comment on almost every episode. So I know that she's listening So you know I can't You know especially in the context of my current travel and stuff like that like I literally am home for five days and then I'm in Minnesota and then thankfully home for a couple of weeks but that in Florida at fit. Like I mean it's crazy So I can't think her enough for being a patient. It's massively underrated. I will save right now that my wife's patients with me of after now it's eighteen nineteen years of marriage and we were together. This is we were eighteen. And I'm now going to be forty four Spend a lot of years. I've been what an incredible person WanNa go to tolerate it much. My goodness Taco by incredibly underrated always super supportive of all of the crazy things that I wanted. Want to endeavour in whether it be this what we're doing right now is fire podcasting or going to conferences or anything else. Actually all of my dreams that I've ever had about anything anything. I was one hundred percent support of behind me and then all of those other horrible traits that I have character defects x Galore and willing to tolerate all of those things. That's the real stuff is not even just this is show these things that are positive things in life is a lot of other crap crap. That's a man what what an amazing super lucky to have her. It's an easy question. The way out to incredibly underrated human being. I still ask her. Some types deals like how. How are you still here? We just laughed together to yes. How about you doing dramatically underrated patients from Ashley guys? Although it's GonNa get tested tonight as I realized them both fifteen minutes later I I said I'd be to go through the steaks on the Grill and sure that I'm out of propane so that patients is GonNa get tested tonight. Founds you'd better get to so so with that. No it needs to go do some cooking. Yes so you know with a with a love letter to all of our wives will end this episode of digger digit and thanks everyone for for listening listening Say Goodbye everybody. Thank you happy holidays all the listeners. Thanks for helping make on education. The top PODCASTS For All of your topics and conversation on education and Mike and Glen thanks are allowed to take part in the journey. It's real joy to be part of your Orbit thanks for listening to on education. My name is Glenn Urban. My Co host is Mike Washburn on education is part of the education podcast network. You can listen to to this show and many others by great educators like Jennifer Gonzalez Matt Miller and many more by visiting EDU PODCAST NETWORK DOT COM. WanNa get in touch with us. Check out our website at on education. PODCAST DOT COM. You can tweet us at on Education Pod. Mike is at Mr Washburn on twitter and I can be found at IRV Spanish. You can find us on facebook by visiting FACEBOOK DOT com slash on education. pod were also on instagram. The grand at on Education Pod. If you're enjoying the show and think others would to. We would be thrilled if you shared it with them. Please leave us a rating or review in Apple podcasts. or or the Google. Play store when you leave a rating gives our rankings of boost. This helps others discover the show. We want to thank our presenting sponsor class crap for supporting us. CHECKOUT CLASS CRAFT DOT COM slash on education to learn more about them. Thanks as always for listening. Stay awesome and see you soon.

Glenn Mike Washburn AI twitter unkindness United States softball twenty twenty Vancouver Donald Trump Minnesota Noah geisel Michael Bonner Glenn Urban Glenn Point Google Glenn Riff Sonny Brown S. U. N
Queen Affirmation 3-9-20

The Goddess Key Lessons

02:03 min | 1 year ago

Queen Affirmation 3-9-20

"Peace and blessings. Everyone does this. Lasagna with the goddess key. Come into you for your weekly Queen Affirmation and I'll be reading from a section of a book that I have with prayer and meditations it is unknown Arthur. So here we go. So discipline is the key to true independence giving up revenge gossip. Vanity unkindness resentment complacency. And self pity use the energy which would have been expanded in these unproductive pursuits for improvement in one owns body. Mind and sold. It is amazing that as one owns attitude improves. Everything else. Seems to make remarkable progress. Let go of the past and never let yourself get caught up in the. What if or if only trapped reliving yesterday usually only serves to hang on to pass tragedy and regret live in the now for today is really the first day of the rest of your life. Do not waste it wallowing in the past mistakes or tomorrow streams. Use this one day minute by minute as best as you can to do your work well and to help someone else. Get THROUGH IT. A bit more pleasant. Because if you K- that was your weekly Queen affirmation please visit the goddess key dot com for your body care products also subscribe and share this podcast and follow me on facebook and Instagram at key. Three three three and until next time. Peace and blessings.

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The Death of an Inspiration

A Tone Meant For Me

15:04 min | 2 months ago

The Death of an Inspiration

"Atonement for me the death of an inspiration Eight magical it's cayden. iv and. Welcome back to atonement for me. So i really hate having to do these episodes but having not had a podcast for very long and having to cover this subject more than once is painful and such a huge part of my life but such a huge part of many other people's lives at the moment. What with the chaos that we're all experiencing and the loss that a lot of people i know are experiencing right now and that is with the passing of jennifer johnson who if you're in the beauty community at sephora you'd know her for being a brand rap if you're in the con- community you knew her for her special effects and her zombies and her absolute love passion joy for anything horror if you. Who have my crazies special francs friends. You knew her as the queen gore team gucci gore. But a couple of years ago. John pulled me aside and we had been friends in passing at work because we both brand rep together and we shared the same passion the same quirky sense of humor the same energy when we work together so naturally we got along really well but she pulled me aside and said that she was receiving treatment for breast cancer and that she was kicking ass and she was doing awesome and that was gen- gen- kicked every obstacles asked. That wasn't her way. I don't know anybody who was more positive or determined or just. Just do it. Kind of person i never. Was she negative or complained or defeatist. She would always speak so highly of the care. She was receiving at the hospital. The nurses the doctors her parents her best friend schroen everybody who was supporting her and caring for her and seeing her down. This crazy journey. That is a life with cancer. A double mastectomy and several rounds of chemo. Later jan is still kicking it and planning for things that she wanted in the future. She always had ideas for photo shoots and was up for projects trauma and and filming and teaching. She had so much love and light and joy and her gift was she was just able to give it to people just by being there by listening by being so genuine. Not a mean bone in her body. All no matter. How much pain or how tired. Jen wasn't going to let people experience with her. People were going to experience the joy that she saw in the world and that was what she was going to share with people. She would blog about her journey with such passion and enthusiasm and optimism. How could you not cheer for her. How could you not want everything amazing for this holy pure and genuine person if ever i issues at work or in my personal life the first thing she would say. How can i help even if you didn't ask for help. You get messages from her. I looked into this. Or what about this. Have you thought about this things. That i wouldn't think of on your own but jen just wanted the best for everybody around our weather. It was client somebody in the street a photographer. She never worked with model. She'd never worked with coworkers or friends. Even all the animals jan loved animals. She with the person who had several different dog treats in her pocket in case she ran into dogs. Didn't have the meral but just in case. My dog later called her antigen because he would always have all of his toys ready for her and when she came over to my house to do the facts and makeup and things he would be right beside her doing everything with her and sharing all his things with her. Because it didn't matter who you are person animal. Jen was gonna give you everything that she couldn't moment all of herself her fearless brave south doesn't seem real that he's gone all of us have photos and videos and voice clips of her and that energy at just how. How has that gone. She saw everything has an adventure as a journey as story. And i can even imagine her going off into wherever she is now with a smile on her face and excitement because it's something that she hadn't done before and let's go but in a time where we see so much unkindness in coldness and cruelty to lose such own war and it's worse than a tragedy because she was loved by so many people whether you got to know her very well or not and she was just such an inspiration to me in the way that she was so brave and so fearless and so genuine and so genuinely her nothing was going to sway her from her path and she was going to have such an amazing time along the way and i wanted to read a part of her blog that she used to rate when she the time to put her thoughts together and it was called charging adversity at full speed and her last entry was december sixteenth. This is why this matters. I know you're annoyed. If you're not mandated to wearing one one is being foisted upon you up on you on you and that makes no help at all especially with all the covid. Nineteen but what about the immuno-compromised people last monday. I was in for chemo. My nurse said you're too seems a little low. I said sharell. This can be sorted out before it leaves the hospital. No problem said my nurse we Said the universe halfway through the drive home. My doctor called. Hi dr is sending me back to the hospital into my pretty private room. Where one assumes tests will be running. Psa the cova nineteen test is not at all as comfortable or as photogenic as it looks in pictures. I was in the pretty room for about an hour before. I got transferred up to the sixth floor. High ridiculous oh to stats definitely not on any side of any side of soundproof. Curtains as is my way. One side had one patient looking for help. Chocolate pudding and attention from the extremely awesome nurse nursing staff. Hi marianne sam. I also traded nasal prongs that were way too big for my nostrils that they may keep in one of my nostrils which proceeded to with needed to get replaced. Every twenty minutes got no more than twenty minutes asleep at a go. i started also with a surprise catheter. Surprise so i wouldn't have to leave the bed and enough of a double surprise. When i thought i pulled it out. I will wake on day. Two with the amazing dr jason. Hi dr jason pudding everything right bringing my out to from ten and we finally found out with my lungs it's lung fungus. It's going to mean pels forever. And if i can do it you can too right. And that's why it matters. It matters because she was brave and it matters because she didn't see things as cruel obstacles. They were just things that needed to be overcome. And i know every single person who had the pleasure of meeting her at any time will agree that they will carry a piece of her with them. Were ever they go. And i guess that makes her own special kind is off. And that's just the

cayden gucci gore schroen jennifer johnson meral sephora Jen gore breast cancer sharell jen jan John cancer dr jason marianne sam lung fungus
Ep. 92 - Just Hooves

Athletico Mince

37:57 min | 1 year ago

Ep. 92 - Just Hooves

"A new daily sports broadcasts from wondering and the athletic does a new episode every weekday morning and you'll get an intoxicating blend of news stories and in-depth looks what's happening I'm on the Dawson and I'm on an actual trend on my way to record another episode of Athletico Mints but other podcast available and I've just been listening to the latest episode of the lead A preview of the League don't forget to subscribe to the late on Apple podcasts wherever you're listening to this right now in recognition of boiled egg breakfast and then you hear the sound of a clapped out Ford Fiesta approaching you playing Dutch German base to its open unkindness in particular I hope you have at least considered anymore ox tongue tear diet it's a very sweet meat before we start I would like you to imagine you walking down a sunny tree lined lane props in the courts foods there's nothing to disturb your peace tranquility apart from Birdsong the occasional Tommy squeaker that you amid you're welcome to go with me Bob Mortimer as always I hope your day's going well and that those around you are treating you with respect makes me feel alive actually very accurate yeah for once for all your job for yesterday my do you do a NASA wrong with a Octavia like these these children fifty thousand miles easy this one to six thirty six thousand miles on the clock I have a dream to pipedream really drive. scored Octavia that's quite like a lower salesman so of Lorraine's taxi driver because everyone's Scotland the Qazis this and then you drive it on the the big wing machine yeah and it wears it and then you go to the hotch Fella gives you a number windows he passes you at great speed and it's fat spherical headed northern driver does a half eaten Greg Stack stake fake you fake shouting what Rome not show and my number was one hundred and four is still all right that's cash that's not the way out of the car when it's a very light for was that vehicle which I was all drive them because the good reliable 'cause I can see you love reliability I could see you at some shitty Sundell used car with him seminar will you remain what are you running out dogs yeah well you can say that then I often Utah Awful he cooks up to twenty kilos of liberal audience every day on it tonight my brow is ten percent like they go I do how does that Oh quiz is called Boeing from Chuck Author Woosh Peanuts Hollow Give me just a little time only a who was that was the only approach but also you know Franco none of them you will just some names gunman taught fisherman well here's the thing I've got some less offs listen gentlemen please what with my co host Mr Andrew Dawson Oh miss the Chris pleased pleased theologies the baby son of Small Lamb Roy Elise let it be three options here we go causes three options okay right don't say in the say at night template Rick Sager Singer of songs he knows the words to over Assyrian Picasso was in my blue dark blue top low like a family man that and then he gives you a check Hera Rain Yams author Okay Okay Archie most popular beer over them this week a moth I won this tall so that's interesting taught fishermen fabulous Julie Eh scripted tally time scrutiny that sounds really good fun when a scrapyard sunland yet you drive in you thus the author was the Tenth Most Popular Baby Name Twenty eight eight Archie was the fifteenth most popular all it's eleven-year-old category category you was really just a thousand mile preview soon was very nervous the like you say it was of course it big pile said Sunlen scrappage area whatever do you mean the town center is right and he sings themself things into himself under his pillow every night Simmons wife weeps beside ever without one what about pay you so aptly pay us to a glass beads when he drives over a speed bump and his mobility skewer the residents think the milk floors arrived yes view by the bosses and that he had to be filmed showing a prospective purchasers around the house are managed to get older the fullish yes good evening welcome to the show pays the Honky tonk so if you go ahead and kick off with a quiz if you WanNa do and then the drive your car off a new wave goodbye that experience you don't get to see store I would have our given back twenty five quid of the hundred and four so to say get crushed outstanding can change this steak bang me start now miss this steak the steak sugar abused opinions they stood the taste like the outskirts of slack minister he's a on what's see for you ask replied sailing ships in but I'm just doing that for the lawful Mike good you're cute so this area king process when was the hacks pelts I don't know great question no now through this portal here is the entertainment hope featuring TV Ariel Rian is the whole way it consists of a ceiling in two parallel walls beneath the floor that they're very thoughtfully place beneath our feet to aid in the world title is known as the back door because it's to the rear of the property and it leads to the outside garden it's a really nice feature think that they've put the garden outside feeling plenty of services for preparing edgy smoothies. Do you think I'm smoothie don't answer that no need I know I am lots of Electricity Hall so you can put you machine Alexa and your decks and mixes right is the floor real off laminates I don't know is the local school any good Obama I'll go out she most popular she moved all of second-most Touchy tearing a thunk Boeing Kimsey I'm going to give you three names the thirty seventh most popular joy because I won't give half attempted unbeaten balling boom chuck author woosh great question of right step through these tools and we'll bang plump in the cooking socializing hub that my Papa God blesses with a neck would have called rooms do the Barry see mattress assault course actually I think I've seen in thanks for your time Cheerio Oh one last thing defense shock for ago no it's just a little more time Archie Duchess thunk bowling thank you very much the kitchen there are various heights within this room ranging from just a couple of millimeters at floor level up to nearly eight feet just seconds under the sea having Barry to lock up on so and as he stood there ain't telephone socket Dimmer Switches and Kissy Cuddly Sofa shoe we try that out now that's how does it have centrally team I don't know I don't know what we'll do you know I you know what I'm okay I'm in a bit of a rush meeting the lights from the our garage for lunchtime spittle nicer no no Roddy Broccoli no Tom Wind it's got actually wow I love girls when a great choice shall we go back inside and look at the bed the Third One oh altos the author's official so who is it just us against all hi though hey is it okay if I tell my girlfriend but joe there was no reply all to that Shade Gun Lee Remove Your Kobe beaming joke for too long now you know it's probably for the best because I would have left Iran a river it never she's left I'm in the flats thought to insult Yup I think she liked me I think it could have been something we know she probably wouldn't have got me probably wouldn't have been on the same level as me reaching up high high high for the business sky no Gotcha of just don't make it easy for your I'll do this are low you're asking the order do you have any pets a cat a dog a monkey six pirates that Canada thing I've got two cats it's call don't tell me let me guess Mickey Houseboat Spark lost mcadoo peculiar me I'm thinking to myself maybe we had together it wouldn't have worked no I a lot park outside the house I don't know but what a great little bundle of questions you fun with the capital Trumpet Right this through these kept Choo Choo Choo Choos but I'm afraid it wasn't sedate she's left me Never Camille Nemr right He's a baby names twenty eight I want you to tell me which was the most popular of the three on that rack she could have moved in with me. It's my beautiful cul de sac we could spend many hours how many hours do you want to send in about my success and delight well done or a good large you've talked you attempted and you and Barry locked up yeah he's left me she's a member of started today I recommend the soups it's bad from the poll up gastric juices of a panther with some fruit flies sky stuff blake Shelton clip of your car your your yeah do come into Rooney I'm Barry See homer commendable all in the next time if you oughta Vons Shit up yet in your it's all sat down in the booth next to him in the good old listen is is our it went could often his life finding us today left she had gone in that level face floated also I was opening around the palace over again Last week or pass by slow as it were so you took it is it days it's it's unleaded. Petrol is unleaded petrol that's helps the plug on it are you start with diesel and I fancy a bit of whatever that is that's another Nadu with the menu so run as personal physician is here she engine runs who opened up your goal at at a lower stategic magic of very to it at all yes you filthy matey by that time approach yes it's the Colin Raynham for the flies Nakas no-go Dante it put me down for some of that disease evs popped in this very so aging Lewis just arrived before well I don't know if either edge loosers already there and he was just beat seated I'm ready okay crime fly stopping the IOM there you've got me flavor with a home see wild updates on what's happened the thing is because the qualitative on sound very the Dow Dale's count amongst the most beautiful areas of the British countryside the hamlet of Brooklyn is the jewel in its crown so Vince Gilligan sat in his home so I said Oh I love this mince oh what's that sound aw I'll see that Dr break in Budd's trailer is Nick My Motorcycle Lois yeah honestly the reach of Governments Isla sound of that you taught and how about your meant it is hang on what's that abominable smell coming from the Kitchen Abo- style with her right now of the kitchen and asking if anyone wanted to lick him so led to shop I think our to do the right thing pitches for him runs giving his wounds air at the moment haw dipped some white bread in love on the side as you wish all could small talk it's like busted and get me fed the focal of course so fuck and Surrey's meagre so comfortable surface there's evil lurking below waiting to rear its head on the second of March two thousand nine that was not so much as scratch but a full blown excavation hunt a nonsense potter that day he was alone in the poetry talking to Klay Wholesaler on the telephone on the outskirts of the village was a small refurbished barn it was the home and workplace of nail once famous for the production of sieves and brass buttons it is now a rural escape for the well-to-do of the large midland towns but even in such a needle such as this if you scratch the outfit White O'Brien this bill hunt nonsense potter and I'm very dissatisfied with the latest batch of clay you send me your terms and conditions clearly stated that it it's John Files directly and why are you ready with just about right we've got two choices for the means for the hormone feud with tits COA slow roasted in a pair of monkeys one of the offer offered Gulick on on Craig's wounds she left me okay very low shrinkage rate an excellent facility well that was a fucking lie I threw a military fame soup bowl on my wheel and it had walked for what do you sir you're large intestine will be so fun thing it's inclusive Oh what have you got for us pistole fuck off that moment a customer entered the shop it was Steve mcclaren Ex England footballing strategist and found a member of the British just mushy tall open a carrier bag on I'll weather bookie around my neck as they go about my business and then just then Ron crags he came out flat turnovers well he's like Barak you'll get a what prison possibly the failed the stories on the late told by the people who write them it's hosted by sports career Davidson and people the award winning journalist under skull stitching till the end of this episode inches lunch club early hello hello Mr Potter what's lovely shop adds to kill Nate what are you gonNa do about it tell me what are you going to do about it come on tell me fucking you connote my says make my technique you'll have actually just said that I feel fuck want to great supporter to walk these fucking loudly streets other bidders fucking fraud shitty kingdom take this as your linked to is so tell me more let's just focus serves Joe Tell you what I'm innovative already this is a park I've seen the video about I'll use the audio from a well they say it's coming it's coming up so I'll I'll play that take that's as good as what you know about a homeowner works as well as part of his in light internally that what you want to do you actually want do you want to get you some nonsense poetry or are you just read k. k. yes I'm very interested a net patches it's snake Casper's fifth birthday and I thought he might lack a little patrick tableau you know like pottery shoe subscribe to this show and hundreds more now via AAC ASS or wherever you get your podcasts but Steve didn't say a word and soon enough in the sting nail fell to the floor unconscious and his slacks covered in urine Casper released his grip his body around meals neck he began to squeeze tightly INS Neal's face begun to redden under the pressure McLaren by the color of his Moss Blazer sorry another fucking why is it always fucking me I've given literally hundreds of pounds to useless kids over the as I sometimes wish I never fucking peaches with creamy whipped cream on top and sprinkling of cuddle and you think you would what have you actually gone I'm fucking dumb. That poetry is replaceable by the way a piece of orange glaze seems to have drifted onto your forehead you'd best brush itself no you silly Rodney from the punkish county that's glow but as he did so he knocked the military theme Party and it fell to the floor smashing into a hundred pieces Kuala wondering data into the island on his head and realized in that moment that's all other styles were dread he'd grown a hat touching fucking void or something no don't be that Casper is Matt bestest friend in the whole wide world he's like a book I've I've only got one piece might be suitable it's on that shelf there by the military themed Party Steve Walked to the shelf and reached up for the kittens shoot pursue the door and raised his head up facing Neil and that state fuck off you should know that my sister in law's father is in the fraud squad a my brother unshaky mcclaren mcclaren covering plays with spits as he barked in anger you fucking pray for that to realize how many not sets all but come on Mr Hunt it's just a bit of nonsense Potter potty posterior surely you can knock another one up neal or is it negotiations to purchase a factory snake steaks with that possible leapt at meal and was went into crafting that military shitting Casper Casper Com quick hell maybe casper the snake that's unusual cheese snick as he kept it on the I don occurrence one of his mouth process plays his fucking country face can't Talk Juarez believe me I won't go with knits later Neil came round to find his Sean Hannity a note on his table explained Dave was taking the shoe cut tableau as compensation dry cleaning hub my appeared at me back door right With the unusual incident yeah with a little bird in his mouth so I took it from him and it looked at yeah shame minutes I uni I told you so that didn't happen shit the euro did not nothing pottery yes to I think it would give him a phone rush and a lovely smiley moment if you say so Latin good undergone usual incident offend online you the debt and undertake from Manchester Marathon Barney's biscuit tin for years and like an egg and cheese light luncheon mia role thing and always ally quest thing of all what's Nice thing for bookstore previously contained in under his good use anyway et cetera checked on and it wasn't in the box and I couldn't find it anywhere aalto fight I mail fucking non sense brought off-side shots can't sound you silly set come I'm sure we concern but neal was in no mood to compromise thank you thank you casper my little job gravy bear bravery look what coffee a day it's a shoe kitten pottery tableau I assumed it flowing out of the kitchen there was a little window open so bit late I was having a bath and I could hear me son play an xbox in his bedroom when I went Kerala once was an manager had an incredible day it came to him while shopping on the First Law of I K he in fact didn't need to be an incident and then when you open date Blah Blah and that's it's still intact hot topic kitchen quite easy to install into his room after me bath miss sudden wasn't there right yeah book on his game in with the little bird things which is the only one that was inevitable all in a ten say you'll chicken thing the chicken soap knows really liked he cooks up he really all right yeah it's okay into the kitchen put it in a little box that I think it paves the content like measuring Yoga right I the only one that didn't survive was the conflict by ship that tired I I've got mixed feelings about this because if he buddha monk call mutates that I want you to think today about possessions Okay Casper smiled and you it would give you a smiley moment and funding of twenty yup piece of treasure you probably realize but it's causing you continual coach Mike who worries okay but you're not even aware of but inter gaup this stuff we should be given a museum or an Eaton on Youtube I don't think that that's share another not sure I'm not sure I'm not sure don't feel about when you show Ooh I've got well I've got I've got a nice silver candelabra sterling silver but it must be worth under-equipped Seattle sounders gone a lovely painting that must be worth probably five six hundred quit who you see cleaning on watch them last night on Youtube by what should nine sixty five Vietnam emergency Russians Tim may not to add the potion got into this yet that worry you feel liberated underlie so you get him and you think that will really help be low seven of your shock okay now you should give that to me you will feel yourself all as well as the goal is now the party import new Arbat be still that you at a poker pouches shogo poucher coffee a conflict by the fruit and not by some chicken soup I I really trust yes very valuable no not ready but for valuable to major valuable sorry do everything is valuable that he treasured how about that Aura combat when I'm sure who doom rose do you do you that you treasure more than any Elizabeth loom or something major value yes I have a picture welcome Sean and tell me how excited to be here today I'm very excited Jim pooling yet unspoiled boil by my excite that today I'll tell you excited I am there's so much anticipated sweat pool in my crock partly success we do things the Burnley way on what exactly is that it sounds terribly exciting listen up I'll tell you do as you told until talk back I need a b could guest on so so oppressed play Allah Click Click welcome back to the Jim White Show see you go oh I you were here all day yeah he was explaining to go role that I've got right now I've got me problem of not enough fucking yeah but we'll we'll go we'll see how we just the best now I've got that ah you used to mop up your juices when you're suffering and excitement oops there goes another pint of Muck so shaun what's the secret of I'm poor poor nail but I've got to Burnley scarf with me to still down that when Charles arrives out that's great and listeners please fallen in and tell me what unusual items is I remember Shit Flam shovels the up but that's it let's I'll tell you kidneys by soil chips as the seal breaks expecting it now are not that number but I do have to go run quite quickly toilet will it's my coolest songs gone without purpose and detachment is a no no you told and don't talk back Blake ten and defense and one is highland island Boca fucking off with if I cut you wearing purview than it's time for you to go go and remember Shit wits will need to escape the flooding and the reason I'm so excited as that's I'm joined today by none other than Burnley Manager Sean dyche Lumpy Soap Lumpy cake known pee close lumpy face lumps in your mattress lumps on the walls so many lumps that the footsie falls if lumps shitting in your carburetor why not switch to Pearson's lump fades spray simply spray on the lump it fades like a puppy and Sally Potter the Tack Pacing The sink when you get the chance tell your wife to folk off if she asks you to dance I dunno micro problems because clinging to possession yeah it's brilliant I can't allow three ever heard while I'm afraid my cowboy boots boots have never filled with monks was that Paula into my excitement trough let's friends he defrost the puck in the microwave while I chop up the man Fox and my kitchen are you driving to the shops in the book between snow I mean I I probably show too they're not great do you have to ascend staircases with extra coal sheen afraid spray alum freight spray who got was tasked the while that's so those Ah yes do you won't even more high quality renew the treasure so it was do do do do to do to use him acid dust his Taylor superfine automation from podcastone for us by the genius is Ben Picks and you'll get accomplished episode of the best bits from one of the characters from the podcast there's also other occasional bits of stuff such as the located in from the kitchen he's become a real pal of my and Fox in the living room provide invaluable go on there so I haven't gotten any music for arched I hope you'll just bear with me spin nonsmoker how we've become the best Okay from my Daily News Fox on the lemon of flaw if it gets upon the SOFA Roger Smack in my mom knows and the living room it's now and find out more each month you'll get an episode of Athletico Parsnips that you won't hear anywhere else you'll get your episodes three early and with all the adverts removed you'll get an exclusive you gave me it okay 'cause the paint yours good thank you very much I'll come around to

Alexa Electricity Hall cul de sac blake Shelton Rodney Barry Rooney twenty kilos eleven-year ten percent eight feet milk
You Should Feel How You Feel

Awareness for Everyone

17:47 min | 9 months ago

You Should Feel How You Feel

"Everyone and exploration of conscious reality creation and living the lives we can for ourselves. I am MJ Lee Heart Writer, Blogger editor and twenty first century philosopher welcome to episode sixty six. You should feel how you feel. Let's get this right out of the way you and only you can live your life. Now for almost everybody I know they are going through a ton of crazy stuff right now. Because for most people I know twenty twenty thus far has been rather shitty year I mean, let's see what are we going on? We got covid nineteen an ongoing pandemic that our government isn't doing Jack Shit about and frankly trying to sweep under the rug and otherwise deny. Deny ignore or fudge the numbers on I mean don't even get me started on how ludicrous this whole situation has become, and we are looking at an executive branch out of control and one of the checks on it, the legislative branch doing pretty much nothing, or at least half the legislative branch is doing nothing because they're his cronies and they're getting what they want. That's just causing all sorts of anxiety. There is the ongoing exposure of the systemic racism in this country and the protests in regards to that and the black lives movement. Really the black lives matter movement, really being emphasized because the frank and distressing murder of several black individuals by police, either completely under no real suspicions, or for no good reason and simply due to. To the color of their skin is unacceptable, and that's what people are talking about. The militarized police forces a force that doesn't necessarily protect you, because no, they do something very different from that, and that's what the whole idea of defunding police is talking about, and these things are just really distressing, and they're causing people to feel intense levels of anxiety and frustration. And it's not surprising and don't even get me started on the whole presidential election, because dear God would a shit show that is and just wait until the Democrats officially nominate Biden, and we get down to the point where you know. Trump gets to start attacking him and vice versa though that'll be. That's going to be like this whole thing is crazy. I, don't know about you, but I am on a short fuse I am finding that more and more I am way too easily frustrated way to easily set off, and I'm just not sure what to do with any of it, and it's made me a little short tempered. It's made me A. Edgy and uneasy, and it's just it's. It's hard to explain. The thing is you feel how you feel? And nobody can tell you what that should look like. People might people will try, and they will make suggestions for how you should be experiencing thing and the thing is, nobody can tell you. You should feel because nobody is in your head you. This year has been unlike anything any of US have experienced in our lifetimes there are few people who around the last time there was a pandemic, but they are few, and far between, and they are quite old. The rest of us have never had an experience like this and everything happening all at once and a government that is completely disconnected and lacking in kindness and empathy. This is just it's causing massive amounts of anxiety uncertainty, anger frustration depression. Depression fear loathing, I mean name it negative emotion, and it's there, and it's there in spades, and it is just beyond anybody's experience, and on top of this there are these utterly ludicrous conspiracy theories ongoing which have zero basis in reality, but people are buying them anyhow, despite the fact that they make absolutely no logical sense I mean bear with me. A second I'm going to go on a tangent because this has been driving me nuts all week. The trump administration has decided that the CDC the Centers for Disease Control a whole bunch of brains who are all about studying disease, and how it impacts us can no longer dictate how we should be reopening the country. That can no longer tell him what he should be doing. No, the CDC has it wrong, but trump knows this is why they're guidelines for the opening. Schools aren't acceptable to him. This is why he doesn't want them. Collecting data because their data will prove ongoing that our numbers are going up that we are not doing the things we can and should be. Doing is a nation to stop this from spreading. To slow the spread to lower the curb to do anything logical with this situation. It is this entire notion? That's being pushed that the science community is standing against trump that they are doing things. They are doing to discredit him. How in any way, shape or form is that realistic? What are they gain nothing? The only one who stands to gain anything from this is trump so by creating an other to stand against he gets to place in on this pedestal like some sort of a demagogue, and put himself as being the ultimate guru. No it all Donald Trump doesn't know Jack Shit about infectious disease. He doesn't. He's never studied medicine. He hasn't got a fucking clue how any of this works, but because it impact his being president, because it impacts his getting reelected in November. He wants you to believe this. This ludicrous conspiracy that everybody is out to get him that the journalists reporting on the shitty things he and his family are doing, and all of the ways in which they are violating. The constitution is just simply to discredit him. Not You know the fact that he's actually doing horrible terrible things, and frankly I have never in my life seen a president with zero empathy, zero compassion and no kindness. All he cares about is himself, and he's created these utterly ludicrous narratives that don't make any sense. So. That's just contributing to the overall sense of insanity that is wrapping itself around our world today. I don't know about you, but that is making me feel way more anxious than I normally feel. It is making me look at the uncertainty of the world and be like what the actual fuck are we doing here? And it's really causing people to question everything. So here we are in the middle of this utter insanity, and you're going to feel how you're going to feel and the thing is. You should feel how you feel. But here's the thing. It's important to recognize and acknowledge your feelings and you need to recognize. Nobody can live in a bubble. But. You also get choose how long to hold onto something. How long are you going to let yourself have your actions and your experiences dictated by the negativities? I'm struggling with this right now. I really am more than I have in a very very long time, and it's at the point where. I sometimes feel I just WanNa Wang my head into a wall repeatedly and shake it out or otherwise just. I don't even know. I got nothing here on this one. And the thing is while I recognize that I'm going to feel this way, and I have every right to feel this way. I also have a choice because I can do something to be more mindful of where my head space is and to do something with that. So this is something to take into account and I'm going to get into this morbid here, but one more thing I want to talk about right now is toxic positively. There is a backlash on the idea of self, help and positivity in the world because of toxic positively I've talked about this before. What toxic positively is is this. It is the notion that the negative feelings. The negative experiences shouldn't be dominant. They shouldn't. Be a part of your existence there unnecessary. You can make them go away. That's not true. You're going to feel bad. You're going to have negative experiences because part from what's inside your own head. You got no control of anything else in the world. You can't control when a car accident happens unless you were driving really stupidly, but a lot of them are just shit happens. You can't control if somebody breaks up with you because you're not in their head and able to figure out why they feel how they feel. Because of this, there is going to be negative in your life. You cannot deny it. You cannot avoid it. You cannot escape it. But positively is choosing when and how to release it because you have the ability to make a choice and. Otherwise deal with the negativity. You are feeling and to work on finding something positive to change it. So you are going to feel how you're going to feel. Now. If you reach a point where you decide, you're tired of feeling a certain way. You can now choose to change it and the way to do that is by practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness makes you aware in the here and now of how you are feeling, what and how you are feeling how you are thinking and the intention behind your actions, it makes you conscious. It takes you out of your sub conscious mind, which unchecked will drive how you're thinking and feeling and puts you in control, so if you find that, you're not feeling the way you desire to feel, and you really want to change it, this is how you do so is by being mindful and getting inside your own head, and going into your mindfulness and your head space and changing how you're feeling. This is an option available to you now I'm not saying you shouldn't feel how you feel because you're going to feel how you are going to feel, and you have every right to feel that way. But if it's not making you feel in a way, you desire to feel if it's dominating your life, it's if it's impacting. Who are and what you are doing? You have the opportunity to change it, and that is done via being aware of your mindset of your head space of your psyche. You're the only one inside your head. Just like I'm the only one inside my head. I have these ideas which I share with you via this podcast and all of my blogs as well as other things that I right? which I share because I feel that. Knowing you are not alone in this struggle, knowing that I am not alone in these struggles together, we can work on these things. We can do better to find better for our lives. If people were more empowered than they are rather than allowing idiots like donald trump or any member of the Republican Party, who follows him. Tell you how life is supposed to be, but instead figured it out for yourself. This would be a better world. If more people were able to think critically, stop buying into these utterly ludicrous conspiracies. We could fix so many world problems, and we could all be in a better place. Overall, there is no need for the levels of distress. There is no need for us to have so much unkindness so little compassion dominating our society right now it's not necessary. It's changed before we have changed it. What do you think the American Revolution was? We have taken the yoke of oppression and thrown it off in various ways over time, and we have learned more and more about the human psyche and what we are able to do with ourselves. And you can take your negative feelings and choose to change them. If you are feeling negative. You can change it. It's up to you and practicing mindfulness opens you taking control. You have to understand. Let me rephrase that. Let me, help you understand this. Mindfulness is. Just knowledge it doesn't change. What's in your head unless you choose to change it? When you take the time. To feel how you feel, and really be conscious of how you're feeling, and not just letting your sub-conscious dominate that you're able to change it. You can then look at the negativity. You're feeling and seek out the opposite. Seek out a way to change it. Do what you can do some good. It's not selfish of you to try to be better in your own life. It's not some people will emphasize that it is, but it's really not selfish. Denying other people rights, selfishness is neglect. It is spite it is hurtful. Things done intentionally towards other people. Doing for yourself is not a selfish act. Because self care is important, you need and deserve to be balanced. So the point here because I think I'm rambling quite a bit more than I normally to. Although let's be blunt. I usually ramble. The point to all of this is that you should feel how you're feeling. You're allowed to feel how you're feeling. Nobody can tell you what it's supposed to look like how you're supposed to feel. Nor should they because nobody else is inside your own head? But if you find that, you don't like it, and you desire to change it. You're empowered to do so. Don't neglect to choose and decide what that looks like and how best it will serve you. You have the ability to use your awareness to change your life for the better. If you are unhappy with the way, things are in whatever form that takes, try to be more aware try to be mindful and practice what you can to see in the here, and now where you are at what you are thinking, what and how you are feeling and the intent behind any actions that you take. In this way you gain control over your feelings over your thoughts and with that you can choose to make your life the best that you can make it. Thank you for joining me for awareness for everyone, an exploration of conscious reality creation and lemon, the best lives we can for ourselves if you have any questions or comments, please feel free to email me at author Mj. Lee Heart Dot Com. You can contact me via facebook at Bihar MJ and on Instagram and twitter at MJ Lee Heart. I WANNA. Thank Mahoney, she is be fantastic artist who has created my cover art? If you're interested in commissioning work from her, you can email her at veins of ink, twenty seventeen at gmail.com. Please take a moment to check my blocks. The ramblings of the Tinian Don at Titanium Don dot com. My articles daily on medium DOT COM has MJ Lee, heart and all of my assorted published books on Amazon Dot Com. Thank you and I hope that you are discovering how awareness go for. Everyone really is something that you can practice to live more fully and to improve your life.

Donald Trump Jack Shit president CDC murder Lee Heart US executive Depression Mj Writer Biden A. Edgy MJ Lee Heart WanNa Wang facebook Bihar MJ editor Mahoney
SHE PRAYS-Day-17

SECOND CHANCE MINISTRY RADIO

12:09 min | 8 months ago

SHE PRAYS-Day-17

"So. I just quickly want to say thank you. Thank you to all of my loyal listeners of second chance ministry radio. Are Notch this podcast. Three years ago and I'm happy to say today that. To you, my listeners is been a success. Thank you and God. Bless. Him. You. Were listening? To Second Chess Ministry radio. New Christian audio a division of recorded books presents. She prays a Thirty Day journey to confident conversations with God by Debbie Lindahl. Forward. By Lisa Harper. Narrated by Nan McNamara. He did. So you can. Day Seventeen. Since, we are now joined to Christ. We have been given the Treasures of redemption by his blood, the total cancellation of our sins. All, because of the cascading riches of His grace. Visions chapter one verse seven. have. You ever had your heart broken. I'm pretty sure. I. Know The answer to that. We humans are surrounded by other humans and Flash. None of us are perfect. We all struggle to keep our selfish and sinful nature in check. So I'm fairly certain that at some point you experienced the pain of hurtful words unkindness management. Or even betrayal by someone you thought you could trust completely. And that afterward, you were left in a puddle of hurt and anger your heart feeling as though it had broken into a thousand pieces. I know. I've been there. Whether the pain is one in your life. It can grow into bitterness, damaging your spirit and straining your relationship with God. Forgiving those who have hurt you is one of the most important necessary acts of love you will ever choose to do. Andrew Murray. Put it this way. As bread is the I need of the body. So forgiveness for the soul and a provision for the one is as sure as for the other. We. Are. Children. But sinners to. The heart posture of someone who refuses to forgive or ask for forgiveness is one of entitlement. It's true that as believers of Jesus. We are God's children and heirs. Our worth is priceless. But Jesus consistently taught his followers to expect mistreatment Instructed them to turn the other cheek when they were treated unfairly to forgive even if the offender doesn't ask for it. And to look over an offense. Why Because that's what Jesus did for us. Romans chapter five very eight says God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners. Christ. died for. US. What an incredible statement. God didn't wait for the murderer, the sex offender, the thief, the abusive or unfaithful spouse the betraying follow were or for any one of us to repent or ask him for help before Christ laid down his life and paid for our sins. God opened away into complete forgiveness even before we believed in him. While, we lived in the Muck of our sin ignoring God's unconditional love for us. He gave Christ's life for us. What deep unselfish extravagant love. Unfair. Is it then if we turn to someone who has heard us most likely in lesser ways than what Christ suffered prior to this death and with hold the forgiveness that was given to us freely. As Colossians, chapter three, verse thirteen says. Make allowance for each other's fault. And forgive anyone who offends you? Remember the Lord. Forgave you. So you must forgive others. In Our self centered human condition, it's easy to feel we are more perfect and more deserving than we really are. But we ll all hurt someone either intentionally or accidentally, and unfortunately unless we go live in a cave all alone. We will most likely do it again before Jesus returns. Now, our selfish imperfections. So, although we've all surely been hurt by the faults and flaws of others. We must not lose sight of our own imperfections. Now. I'm not saying this is easy. It can be difficult for us to let go of the hurt and pain caused by the words in actions of other people especially those we love. Sometimes. It seems the offense is so great that it's altogether impossible to forgive. But the bottom line is this. Holding on to an offense and withholding forgiveness is deadly to our spirits. It. Sinful. And if left unchecked. It will eventually create a wall between us and God. That's why we want to keep our hearts free from bitterness. And the only way to do that is to surrender our hurt and pain to God. And then choose to forgive. Not Too long ago. I met Jamie a young woman who started coming to our TURT-. Opened up to me and shared her story. When she was just ten years old. Her mother began to traffic her for sex to men in their community. So she could have money for drugs. For nearly seven years until she found a way out. Janey was severely abused sexually physically and emotionally. Though the sexual and physical abuse stopped once Janey escaped. Her mom continued to remind her every day that she was worthless an unloved. The abuse and terrible words from the one person she should have been able to trust. Cut deep into her heart, and mind. She believed them to be true. And over and over, she tried to end her worthless life. Yet somehow she never succeeded. One day she was invited to attend the designed for Life Women's conference at our church. And there for the first time ever. She heard about a man named. Jesus. Who loved her completely and unconditionally? He didn't view her as worthless. But as beautifully created on purpose and four a purpose. God didn't love her because of anything she had done for him. He loved her just because of who she was. A girl designed by God. And Worthy of his love. She learned. That Jesus died to rescue her from spiritual hell and that by believing in him, she could find freedom from her past and healing for the pain of rejection and abuse. Right then and there she made the decision to commit heart to him and her life was transformed. Through encouragement prayer and the example of Jesus Janey discovered the freedom to forgive her mother. It hadn't been easy or simple. But with the support of her New Church Family Janey has built strong boundaries to protect herself from the individuals who heard her. It's important to know that forgiveness doesn't equal trusting those who have hurt you. Forgiveness doesn't even mean you have to have relationships with the people you've forgiven. Sometimes. That's not possible or even good. forgiveness. Is a matter of your heart. Not anyone else's. It's trusting that God will take care of whatever is needed in the hearts of those who hurt you. As Janey opened her wounded soul to Jesus. And began the task of working through her anger and pain. She was astounded by Christ's fierce love for her. And how his love filled her heart to love and forgive even those who had hurt her. Her choice to forgive full woman of God she was designed to be. Today Janey is a new person, an active ministry leader who serves to help others find the same love and freedom in Christ that she did. Maybe. You need to seek forgiveness from someone. Maybe. Like Janey, you need to extend forgiveness to someone who has hurt you. But you don't have to do this in your own power. When Christ paid for every sin, the cost included our sin of unforgiveness. He works in us. Helping us to forgive others because he I forgave us. Let me say this? In my experience forgiveness is not a one time act. Years Ago John and I were betrayed by someone we had been friends with for twenty years. We were deeply hurt. But. By God's grace, we made the decision to forgive. That choice didn't mean our feelings of hurt were wiped away. It, didn't mean that when we saw that person we jumped up and down in excitement. No. The memories and feelings weld back up our hearts. So, we had to choose again and again to forgive. Until finally, the choice of forgiveness covered the pain. And replaced it with love. The more time we spend with God in prayer. The. More we become like Jesus. And the more we become like, Jesus the more capacity we have to forgive and love others like he does. As Paul said in a Fijian's chapter four verse thirty to. Be kind affectionate toward one another. Has God graciously forgiven you. Then graciously forgive one another and the depths of Christ's love. One of my faith heroes Holocaust survivor. Corrie ten boom said. Forgiveness is an act of the will. And the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. Do you need to extend forgiveness to someone. I encourage you not to wait until you feel like forgiving. and. Not To base your decision to forgive on how you think the other person will respond. As you choose to love like Jesus did. Go will soften your heart. And give you the strength. To love again. Thank you for listening. This recording was made possible by the grace of God.

Janey Jesus Lisa Harper US Second Chess Ministry Nan McNamara Debbie Lindahl Andrew Murray Christ. Life Women Paul TURT Jamie John twenty years Three years seven years Thirty Day ten years One day
Seyi Akiwowo

I Weigh with Jameela Jamil

1:09:02 hr | 4 months ago

Seyi Akiwowo

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New episodes are released weekly every friday morning. That's s. k. i. m. m. this hello and welcome to another episode of iway with jamila djamil. Uk account believe it's december about terrifying lease. Mariah carey is on the radio all day everyday. Which is the only good thing about this month arriving so soon. I swear it feels like we went into lockdown about a month and a half ago and yet that was march thirteenth which was all the way at the beginning of the year they account as three is or not a year at all. I'm not quite sure about how we should have to deal with or respond to this year but it is extraordinary and and maybe just like you. I've come out of it with no skills. I'm just squishy which is great. And finding i'm very cuddly in cozy. And i am more socially anxious generally morang shas afraid of going back to work not remember how to do literally anything off of and pick up a dog shit which is kind of all. I feel like i've been doing this year. And saying the word sit a no and off. Those are the only three words that i know for sure can still say so. Yes december guys. Let's get real. But that's why i've chosen today's guest and i will explain why she's on in a second but i i just want to tell you that we are doing an exclusive series only on stitcher premium which is a bona series. Where you can ask me anything any questions you have about anything in life you can ask them to me. Bring me your worst. Your most personal and i will not give away your identity or anything about your name known. It's you. I will just read out the subject matter and i will bring someone on whose opinion i respect. Who will help me try and work out how to best help you and serve you with your issue so you can call or text us at one eight one eight six six zero five five four three or even email us at podcast at g mail dot com anyway back to today's current events. I asked this wonderful and inspiring women to come onto. The pope costs in particular now because as we lead into christmas. We're going to find that people feel the most isolated the most vulnerable the most traumatized they're looking back on. What's just been believably difficult and horrifying gear. That has not just been upsetting when it comes to the ideas of like illness isolation and pain and death through political division and so much unkindness and so much bigotry. We are all failing absolutely fucked and so this would be a good time for all of us myself included. Because i can be a sassy bech online to be a little bit gentler and a bit kinder and a bit more thoughtful about who is behind these emojis and who is behind these sort of you know anonymous profile pictures online. We should be more thoughtful about how we are speaking to other people how we are reading that tone and how we are allowing ourselves to be treated online and whether or not it is actually safe in our current mental health states to be online. This is shay akio. Who is the founder of glitch. You k it's an organization that helps educate people about online bullying and it holds huge social media platforms to account in how they protect and preserve the safety of people on line and they do a lot of work in educating kids and people all around the world in how to be a better digital citizen even that expression alone is part of why i love shea so much i will let shea explain to you herself what that means what it means to be a digital citizen a what digital system looks like she came on and just blew my mind with so many facts so many statistics so many personal experiences of her own and unjust so much wisdom and thoughtfulness about the way that we carry on with our lives and how we have to stop looking at our lives online and offline a separate things separate entities separate versions of ourselves. It is all the same. We have to be human beings on both types of platforms. And as i said before. And i talk about this with how online she and i both have our own regrets about ways in which we've conducted ourselves online and we get into that and i think that a lot of people are guilty of just allowing your worst self out there on the internet because part view that feels it feels dehumanized. You know and also when you're looking into a screen there is a blue light coming at you. That is truly making off your brain to actually produce empathy. So we are unim- pathetic and dehumanized and talking to each other as human beings with feelings backstories and hearts and souls and we only to work out together how we can navigate this tricky and scary and way to undersupervised world of online better together to make us all happier on just nicer me. So this is the absolutely excellent chance my chevy acuerdo. Welcome to i way how are you. Hi i'm okay. I mean where could this could have been a better week this day of the world but i m okay one hundred thirty. I'm okay i'm okay. I cannot imagine considering your line of work what this week because the whole years felt like for you as a black woman existing within society watching all of these things about police brutality in the uk in the us and now also in nigeria. For those. who don't know we're talking about if you've seen the hashtag and saws s. a. r. s. online. It is because they are referring to police brutality over nigeria and so considering stays work before the british nigerian women's rights activist and campaigner. This is This is i imagine just incredibly triggering and tough and you know. I think all of us feel like we're seeing in so many different ways the the world move backwards and so therefore considering what shit show it is online the world has never needed a company like yours was more so you run a charity called glitch. Uk and. i wonder if you would tell us exactly what it is that you do. Thank you so Glitch and we are based in the uk and we're a small charity determined to make the space online a lot safer for all. I'm we aware that women and girls are disproportionately impacted by online abuse and homes and those with intersecting identities also risk and so we do a lot around raising awareness of how online abuse impacts different communities. And doing that through intersectional lens. We raise awareness with both government and And tech companies through advocacy works try and get systematic long term change. But we also want to address the kind of exodus of women leaving the online space or having to do with the repercussions of being online whether it's career financially socially mentally healthwise. I'm by delivering training and resources moving going for three years and it was birthed out of my experience of being a politician and a video of a speech that i've made at the european parliament went viral and it was about racial injustice actually And it went viral and it was fine at first. I still yet. This is it going to get a blue tick on twitter and gave the ellen show idris elba style government's response on my tweets and declarations of love number happened. Somebody posted on neo nazi websites. And then. I was on the receiving end of trolling online abuse. Beat a woman that the law was lacking The the response from society is was lacking the the raw victim blaming around. Saying it's just the job stick with it. And yeah i guess. My of stubbornness and annoyance and anger just birthed. Miss oops baby called glitch and we've been going threes that's amazing. And what was the toll on your woman to have when the video first baron you started being hounded by actual nazis. I think the tomas was onto in t- ways. Because i think the positive of like going far everyone like you. Sharing dot obviously kicks off some crazy endorphins. And it's great. But i also did take a toll on my mental health in having to respond and food was not having to engage in continental and then yet the high turning as well because i went into fight mode if everyone has a different response mechanism when it comes to trauma fight mode. I didn't realize how exhausted i was until somebody told me to stop and i was away working in dubai facilitating for the british council and I had a three days before having to go to the next next workshop. And i just stopped on my body like seized up like i'd been at the gym working out like detroit all dishes for like a. I n no something that my body was just hurting and it was that that coin. I said when i come back. I'm not gonna do the campaign for team. So i took a break. And they came back in over the summer. And i realized that i was coming of a place of definitely informed trauma by was being led by metro. My was fear four. I was paranoid. I wasn't sleeping was eating and it was all being mosque in this kind of flight mode but it was definitely psychological and physiological response to up the abuse anytime my notifications went off. Good ole bad or just like a council email. I was getting this kind of relive moment and thank god to the nhl styles able to get therapy and it was my first couple of years of diagnosis that an assessment. They said to me that. I was suffering from post post stress disorder urban. Ptsd and i. And i thought well those were things that happen. We'd like really horrific violent situations and i was totally downplaying. How to matic the whole experience woes and having to go through. Cbt for six months on really having a new relationship with the incident and knee relationship with my phone a narrative. Of how i how. I set boundaries and that was really tough because of what i do. I'm we haven't talk about my story constantly. Having to be around other women and a number of people who experienced online abuse and having to set a wet set bound. In a way that i could tell my story that reaching and myself and also be in the room and a whole space by the people where i wasn't then let them down not to call lost a lot work. Yeah well i mean. I love what you said about the fact that you you told me this before as well that that can advocacy work. Online should be trauma informed but not trauma lead. I wonder if you would expand on that a little bit. Yeah it was a revelation. I think late last year around. How a lot of all kind of movements. Whether it's anti-racists any form of anti oppression is birthed out of a lived experience and that is trauma and it's great because it means that we are all able to stop. That schumer affects many other people you see with. Fgm campaigner sofi jones genital mutilation campaign as you see with people who really put themselves on their nine using their stories and by the same time. How do we make sure our trauma doesn't continue to lead us so we're not led by actual mobile bay informed by and so we so we make sure that we're not to issues without to singular issue focused and therefore potentially doing other harms other groups of people who are marginalized and how we make sure that we're taking care of ourselves. We're not burning out so our movements work campaign so sustainable and it we really really came to To like a massive elation for me. When i was just seeing so many more campaigns having to be birth because of the the way i'll structure and society is all around the world and they're just been a lack of care and support and philanthropy full campaigners to able to heal continuously him in would work and that's why i'm really just passionate about yes. Let's be trauma informed but let's not be too late. Let let not be really the thing that's becomes a niece. Sexy thing to do is like bad all online which we think is transparency but actually can be doing so much harm because not everybody's nice online there were lots of decades but could use your vulnerability in your transparency to hurt. You and i think it's really about spending more time Giving that cats are leaders into our campaign as he will at the four from one hundred. I'm i mean christ of island what it's like to be vulnerable. And then have people turn around onto me and then that to either like gaslight me or discredit me or mark me and my family so i definitely agree with that and i think i've definitely pulled back a tiny bit. I will not continue to be open and very transparent. But i think there are certain parts of me that now just like not everyone in the world is is decent or or is even trying to receive this with any kind of integrity. So i think that's that's so important point that out and also. I think it's important that we don't trigger ourselves right. So there's a point in in the set up of glitch and being online and doing the worth and speaking and all of this stuff. I could see that. I was a little bit addicted. I was leaving a researching the comments. I was checking my messages. Like i wanted to continue to inflict pain on myself and it was really weird. How easy is to be. It's it's the children's the violence so much study. There's so much study out there. Around as study out there around Around trauma and and i think if we're going to have more movement saudi because of the way the world is birthed out of it we have to have a better relationship with how wall organizations and campaigns Let's be sustainable in order to be inclusive and isn't so trauma lead. I didn't know that the fact that we are as as human beings kind of prone to being addicted to seeing doom and gloom and trauma in my in my head. That doesn't even seem practical. I completely believe it. And also i've seen myself do it and i've seen countless other people do it do you. Can you expand on that all just fascinating to me. I mean i think we see every day with how bag new cells in medium Story lines as well. I'm a. I'm a lover of eastenders just the whole genre. I wonder fit to safety thing of like. I know what's out there. I need to know what's coming. Yeah definitely because no one had my back before. So i've got to have my own bag. No one really has black women's back so i've got my own one hundred percent. There could be around survival for shaw. I never something around. Have we internalize. Maybe we deserve it. We deserve infliction of pain there. Every so much. To unpack and mrs wyatt definitely. Just stay there needs to be a the needs to be well. Her globally best relationship around mental health. And how about mental health care mental illness and everything but how we say it's okay for our leaders and our campaign is to take rest and do things more place of rest and from a place of joy because that's where you see creativity and inclusivity and love raw than trauma and violence. Where is now a scarcity of resource. I'm going to do my go away. I'm going to apply for that application. And no with you and there's no collaboration and there's no new innovative thinking they talk about it. Is what now body that fight flight freeze and all that and let the cortisone. That builds in your body through jordan is only meant to be for short space of time if it constantly being driven an all and boise e e way arm muscles away outlaw out all the good things in our body. That's why i don't have any muscles any muscles do because i'm always on twitter. It's not because i'm lazy. Yeah i call him do push up either. So that but i only lived experience a lots of trial and error through lots of is you said you know my pain being seen out there and you know lots of light breakdowns and having to really dictate about more self care and self love is no. Everybody gets basically comes across selfish. Some people it comes across you know having to push against the tide of like burnout burnout being this kind of modernism and badge activity sculpture and and in campaigns is hard so true i it. It's so funny because it is so important to understand that that working or self into the ground is not appropriate. It's not helpful. It doesn't achieve anything if anything it's just you create a much shorter lifespan for your work. And as you said you'll moment of innovation and yet i think especially with with brown women and more so with black women. There is just this idea that we don't feel you don't feel pain. You feel exhaustion. You are just a a mule to be piled onto. Who's kind of carrying the world on your shoulders and so with when it comes to all of my black friends especially those who are activists. I noticed that self care isn't something that is avatar gated at them. It's a self care is white and that it's just the way it's been marketed if you look at every spa. I've never seen like a spa. That has a black woman or even a brown woman in a in a dressing gown with you know the slippers and the head and arap cucumbers on on her is exactly in something that is going to actually fit my afro hair. I've been those shalva cops that give you in the hotel ain't gonna ain't gonna do any condo business but you're absolutely you brought in that. We have if we want. All campaigns movements to be sustainable truly revolutionary. We have to take heed to the words of audrey. Lord the self carries a revolutionary act for for black women to say no and to say yes to herself not to continuously serve and be a conduit for other people is so revolutionary in itself. We we can get young girls and women to be saying assessing boundaries based on their needs back in i believe is also a will be a game changer in that that in the mental health movement in the kind of self care movement but also. Yeah i'd love to see like a black owns spa that would be truly inclusive for treatments. That will be working for my skin and my skin tone. Yeah one hundred percent. I way you see people who look like you in there and on the pictures. Yeah i one hundred percents hit. And i think that i think that conversation has definitely starting especially you know over the course of the summer where people would just realizing. There was so traumatized and they really unopposed. George floyd are starting to use that terminology. More it's just about the access to it. Yeah when well for us. We saw in the u. k. A guy cool desmond up in manchester the validated by the police in front of us daughter while the petrol station. And the glitch team said this we have this something for us to be doing here and talking tech companies about platforms an a greater autonomy of the platforms and of what it means to be a digital citizens with rights and responsibility and then two months. Later george floyd happened and we saw his mother. We saw him call out for his late mother and the pain and that was constantly share and retweeted with notre warning labels with no with no opportunity to opt in it was e. Silva hashtag matter. You followed an account. It was on your timeline. the algorithms were basically profiting and censoring oil which was great for awareness but not great for mental health. And there's got to be away as we've seen it now. This week and in the coming weeks is only gonna get worse before it gets better than the revolution comes in nigeria amen. We're gonna see more graphic content and we got to see more documentation and live stream of what's happening in the run because we need to know this is where tech companies can invest some of them some of their billions in making that process of trigger warning sensitive labels responsible uploading lowering blood. Just blurry bluster. Coming an opt in to make that clear image muting filtering also says so much that can be done so that we can still stay aware but not expensive black people's mental health and wellbeing and and that dignity and humanity and there's one point i wanna make as well i'm not gonna lami people will find out. I guess onto an instagram cousteau. Popey told me but we've had examples of documentation before and we're in history repeat itself we have documentations of genocide we have -tations of holocaust we have documentations of slavery has not changed. America by has not changed of awards that will go on a former colonized. Countries thighs not made from empires. I'm still empires today. Nia clearance any better though. I'm also taking my get shot off a little bit and not just the online space. I'm also a little bit up to hear about documentation needs to justify humanity next hundreds of actually. What we want is just to listen to our words. We don't need to keep seeing merges be livestreamed on facebook and twitter. One hundred one hundred percent. I agree with you so much. Ritual isn't your typical multivitamin rituals clean vegan. Friendly formula is made with key nutrients informs that your body can actually use with no shady extras. 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Would you say is it year year and a half we. I think i think mostly times in which we would reach out to each other when we saw the other one on fire online. And i've really appreciated dot friendship and those moments to have those really massive compensations and when the other one is being trolled or taken out of context the way that we have been able to support an uplift each other and sometimes we don't always agree and those conversations are always had with so much love unsown much care and knowledge that the other one has good intentions exactly and so you know. I think that you and i will. Sometimes kind of so lightly. Debate was going back through. What apps over the last year just before this chat just to kind of reminisce and just seeing the way in which we engage with each other. Christ i wish more people had that and i've never even met we've actually been faced. Yeah but but i feel like i know you because of how intimately we've spoken in such vulnerable moments and i cannot express people how much more that inspires someone to to be bestself. When they don't feel that they're being written often undermined. I'm not saying you can't criticize shane. I opened with each other about you. Know the homes of quote tweeting all the different things that were open with each other about our mistakes in the post which will get into in a minute but we we speak to each other with the knowledge and with the hope that the other person has a heart and has some integrity and a brain. And actually you you more want to call them in than just like not even call them out. Calling people out was fine but just cost them aside. If feels like a so much of that now just just dismissing someone diminishing them. I'm not talking about cancel culture. I think that's a different thing we will. I talked about a billion times on this coast. But i'm just saying the way that we even with people that we love and it's like oh you have a different political belief to me. Well then fuck you fuck you forever. I'm not tokyo blocking your number anymore. Rather than just trying to engage. And i feel like we're not even fill it with not even allowed to with those in the opposition otherwise we considered allies to the opposition. You know so. For example. For a minute i was trying to see if i could follow people who oppose the rights of those. I fight for. Because i wondered if maybe if i could understand them and maybe they could understand me. We could start to come some sort of compromise or humanity. Oh just some sort of. I don't know i don't know if it's like a stalemate but a way to humanize one and maybe i could educate them but just by following them. I was considered like an evil villain. We'll just for even asking the question i would like. Is it helpful if we never talk to each other by offering that question. I was accused of denying the rights of those. I was fighting for and i'm just like i don't. I'm not the expert here. I'm not saying necessarily arbor. What fuck do we do that like. How are we ever going to get to a better place. If we can't have the conversation this so much there. I number one you're right. That dishes isn't jeb online etiquette efficacy. All the things we'd be in scott discussing up until now isn't about saying that all gonna to is all about us online space. We're always going to agree. Like that's that's not. I'm not with not going to get that. Utopia it saying that we can disagree with our descendants into online abuse. We composed with are automatically. Assuming everybody's going to agree. What's on both sides. The people shutting down debate because somebody's disagreeing with them and he's not venturing into use and then a co op term online abuse. Which i find really annoying. Obviously because of what i do and using it to protect their accountability fish that exactly to put to push a conspiracy away and protect their their privileged identity. Not me. I want to pull my high lassie's bomb the flip side we can criticize. Without having its descends online abuse without evans. Descend into name calling. Answer vitual and i have to sometimes catch myself because i'll start a read a tweet. I'll agree with you. And i'll like it and then it will end. It will just go off in some way. Why don't you just stop there. And after unlike it because of what you just said about it glare on saying oh charity of anti-abuse online likes abusive tweet. I just know that was. There's no that's what's going to happen and this there's another thing you said about. How do we have a dialogue. This is mean that now. We're going to invite a racist for christmas or we're gonna know how gonna get get you're not gonna get turkey we can bring the race this round because you can do all social bubble here in the uk. But that's not what it's about and backs people on two extremes. There is a as as a social studies. Show the reason conflicted middle. There is a conflicted middle of people who have grown up conditions in patriarchy. I've been victims the way some of us have been in in in in how we have to bow down to man in some of the servitude in terms of The hierarchy of oppression the hierarchy of races that people who've been conditioned to that on On the beginning of their journey to be woke and want to do. And i'm making a lot of mistakes and those people that can be engaged. It doesn't mean the person who is the oppress women. Having to tell white women have to be better. No that's where allies can come in and do that. Yeah and i think that's where we should be support one thing. It was really good. My work wife gabby ettlin. She's upper charity called good period. And it's about period equity and when it comes to have brought lives matter. She wanted herself as a service. Basically two black women who are having women in their. Dm's asking them questions. She is a jewish woman. Who said for the next week. Please start message. These women message me an altered education. That is what i mean about. Creativity using the online space to bring more people in to understand to jelly. Wanna understand you not being lazy but are so confused one hundred percent. I think the reason why i have this stumps which is not the same for everybody. Which is fine is. Because i look where where i'm from and everything was set on the cards for me to be a ticket was brought in the church. The way i was brought to in terms of of sexual identities all of everything. I have not all been self taught all through one lecture at university about critical race study at education. It the threads. I was privileged enough people to go to university and get an induced are moving myself and really china into the church leave church and and china's my family and not to serve family members. Because i did that. And that's where. I feel like i have to be gracious. The people who are on their journey against not being gracious to dickhead who intentionally setting up political parties and you are are calling. Black lives matter a threat to democracy. This is not about that about that. Those conflicted middle those people who want to who want to be on our sabah. Just don't get it just don't understand and even people who do get it on certain issues and of completely blind spots and others. I've never example me. I used to be an semitic it. We used to be so. I didn't realize it was a trope because it was so embedded in jokes in school so embedded in certain music references and it was literally until i remember being an account so me in about three four years ago and they read out the definition of what tropes were and they gave examples and i literally wanted to be sick because i was like. I can't believe i call myself an anti-racist i've come on a journey to understand how to be a better allied to transmit these lgbt's communities. And i had this blind spot. And i did. The work said to to to to jewish friends. I'm i'm so sorry. I'm not going to be white woman. Says how have. I missed this and again having friends who was so gracious to me to get me to see my blind spots and and then i did. I did walk experience with the holocaust education. Trust i then became facilitates the franchise to really like give back. I learned to do the work. And i did a threat and i just said i totally get why some people don't see semitic let me tell you somebody he used to take. I did a threat and it wasn't read any at the praise. God did it. As a way of saying i as a black woman who prided themselves anti racist still had blind spots and i think that's also important lots of to to realize as we get as we progress. The which is what we want realize that we've been ever tickets but say as west as we've grown up on social social media with a digital footprint. Well oh yeah. I'm very well aware laugh. Many footprints seven hundred down the beach. Internet never forgets. I'm thank god. Because i've become a better person for the fact that the internet didn't forget and i won't able to disarm brush under the carpet. I is similarly to you was was primed and ready to be Prick and it made me a brick. I'm probably still a break. And i'm still undoing my turkishness every single day. I was sue us. I've assata foggy misogynist until recently like eight years ago. I was one of those goals. He was just like any female friends. Know many friends guys now. Most most women. I i thought that rape culture was perpetuated by women. Didn't i didn't even know the word patriarchy until like sixty s. i didn't know anything about non binary people. I didn't know anything really about history of trans women like i was calling myself a feminist and slut shaming female celebrities blaming women and saying that women are vacuous and dumb. And like all these. I i would beat. If i had any upper body strength. I would be the old me up so muscles because as we said online. It's not because i'm weak. No so i i was. I was someone that i i hate now when i look back on i forgive but i'm just i'm embarrassed. I don't even hate them. I understand that they were product of their environment and something. I have problematic personally. And i've seen it helps many other people. Is that when they do what you did. Which was incredibly brave. Both here on that and on twitter thread when you owned up to your own previous mistake. I think that's incredibly brave. And when i heard you do it made me respect you even more and find you even more inspiring but i feel like especially in the last year now when you own opt your previous mistakes those lot of vitriolic big vitriolic response when you say that i did this eight years ago. We saw it just not too long ago with jennifer lawrence where she ended up to the fact that in two thousand and eight. She was years old. She had been raised very religious. Very republican been told only about the fiscal benefits of being republican. Didn't really know anything about democracy or democrats and and didn't know any democrats because she lived in kentucky which is a very republican area. So she owned off to the fact that you know she until eight years ago was a republican and time has grown up learned changed her views. Dot to align more with the world became a bernie supporters become full democrat. has been mortified by trump and really had him expose the problems within the republican community. And all have seen online since is hatred towards her and i. I don't know. I've got no allegiance jennifer lawrence fun like i feel like that so shortsighted by mrs a woman who saying look. This has been my journey in order to reach out to people who might be on the same journey. She's not bragging about the fact that she didn't vote for the first ever black president. She saying i was you know she was like i was a little republican. I think there's a her exact words. She didn't mean a small amount republican. She meant i was a small child republican. And the way that people ripper. I found the same thing with me whenever i've owned up to my old slut shaming people are like no. That's a tattoo you've done that now and a well done you've owned up to it. And whenever i say like oh. I'm learning anyone else's learning or oh progress. not perfection. people are on fuck off. She says she's learning progress. Not perfection no this. that's human. that's what i'm not saying. I'm learning and then repeating the same mistakes. I might make new mistakes. But i'm always learning and growing and we have a kind of shaming of saying that you're learning or saying that you're in progress. It's as if you should just bugger off. Do do all of the you know. I think you should do the welcome private. That's not why. I'm trying to say. But you should just bugger off. Learn everything come out perfectly saying the exact right amount and coming across as if you are this omniscient all knowing excellent being whereas i don't find that very fucking accessible the reason i make a point of if i fuck up being vulnerable saying sorry and then teaching people as i go along bringing someone on my podcast or making youtube video to explain the history of it what we can all do how we can all be better so that other people don't make the same mistake as me. I don't think we should be meeting. People like that with mockery. I think that that's the only progressive or if we don't believe in change what. The fuck is the point of activism. I completely agree with you again. At the risk of people telling me washing agree with you. No one no. I know you get shit for being friends with it's okay I think also because just on nothing. A lot of people want everything to be public can be public reprimanded and and and people. I think people forget what my job as a mercier charity. We've got to be crossed party. This thing things i would love to say. Obviously something's idea d say when it really is a violation like what's happened this week with nigerian and then to be a global response that is not global response has been in the past but she's just to invade and take oil So i've i've kind of bone immune system to the kind of expectations around what needs to be done in public and people just need to mind their own business there. Well i agree with you. Why agree with you particularly around these this this idea of perfectionism in feminism activism and. I don't know where the fuck it came from because we know the walls are not perfect. That's why his activism. So i don't know where it's coming from. I don't something that's still lingering. From being conditioned around perfection at what patriarchy wants from women to be perfect and be well so well groomed and put together and again perfect that we are placed by massive expectation on each other and on ourselves. By the way sorry is gonna say council ourselves so easily and on ourselves absolutely at the danger of that is one we we create idols. We create people that we worship and adore because we expect perfection from them and we don't. We don't allow people to make mistakes. Obviously you're informs evita. He should be making so many mistakes. Because that's why you'll leading we. I don't think we. I think the ballots needs to take backs to see human humane humanity in people which is imperfection so we correct idols if we don't Better grop around perfection and again. That's no good accountability. All of this. The individuals seeking. Perfection is a massive distraction from long term systematic change. We have to deal with the fact that all faiths in music in politics in in cultural payment and coach our family our faves. I'll going to sometimes be problematic because no one is perfect. We have grapple with that yet. I think technology algorithms. I'm gonna find that a lot more. I think i think in the kind of combativeness sensor platforms and and the like i just think. Yeah i think technology could could could could help reduce that kind of eagerness to perfection but all of this is a massive distraction and social media. Which which should be highlighted. The issue is what he's done is highlight individuals. I think we you know. I love absolutely love. Audrey lord i love martin luther king. I love malcolm x. I am. I love so many of these amazing activists before me i ca. Imagine if they want social media you'd be you'd be seeing want some more so no perfectionism is is basically created idols. And it's not good accounts bulletin means. I'm using a sustainable is a distraction. We're not talking about people. And i think it's healthy. I don't think he's good too. So self catch be spending time caring so much about individuals but i think the platforms do platforms. Make us have an opinion about kim kardashian. I mean. I think some people like him that she used that to continue their platform. But why do we need to comment. Why do i. Why do i get drawn. Into having opinion. I see in the explore. Page to comment. And then i and then i and then i see some of mr ariffin. People said you don't actually have to press send those things share the posted in a secret. Whatsapp group say your friend. I texted some of these things to each other. That's what d- what dmz for them. I have a running joke with everybody including east tweet would not everything has to be posted and factors conundrum especially when we know that everything seems to be online at this message of footprint in that that lingers around g forever yeah i and this is where i think self care again going back to what i talked about before about self care and rest and not being format lead but former informed is so important in dealing and addressing these things that don't allow movements to be sustainable one hundred percent just regarding concussion just because her name my name who is a braided together will say. Is that something that's really like. Frustration is that i've called her out. Maybe three or four times or call that family at three or four times. I always do it in a productive once. I was rude the first time. I was rude but i also had like ten thousand followers might didn't think anything of it. I didn't come the most viral tweet. That i've ever had are. I said for half an. That's bad. And i regret that i shouldn't have used those words. I should have been more thoughtful. No that anyone has ever gonna sit. I was an idiot but aside from that after that every time always been thoughtful. It's been empathetic. It has not been with any kind of hope to cancel them. Just want them to stop doing that. One specific thing that i think is literally dangerous that i know is dangerous to our society and then i move on and i tell people you know what. Just stop trolling her. Just follow or mute or blind a go away with thaad love. You can find your new favorite bra with high quality company styles starting at just forty five dollars and every third love bras made the signature memory. Foam cups a no slip straps and scratch free band and there are more than eighty sizes thirdlove's online find a quiz. We'll help you find the size and styles that are right for you and over. Fifteen million women have taken the quiz today. Third love helps you. 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When i if 'cause i've always said i'd like to die before him because they signed him up. I want to try to isis. To william the one of the things you have to do is send a screen show of mute list so people can be really shocked at the people and things. I have needed some times. I don't even see the direct. And i don't even i don't i don't get it because i don't follow the accounts that people are talking about. I don't maybe. I'm a grandma said to to to to black twitter into feminists twitter. 'cause i i don't see until people say why do i need this. 'cause i haven't seen it wants to follow the drama. Same the people call out. Why would i want to see that. Shit and i think that's where again education around using the platforms to serbia. Ju self cast you. Don't get stuck into that cycle of going to twitter for the drama but going to talk about the issues and about the people the issues and than queen watson saying quote. Tweet something that somebody has said and hasn't opinion of insane. It's dumb. Why don't we talk about the issues in the intellectual interactive and. I think we have lost the debate. We have lost the having a conversation. Without as i said before today and i've said it all the time on the time line and it's not an again. That's not even sexy. That gets that much re. What does get is when. I do get annoyed at tech companies and i'll get lawn and are basically against in a way being hypocritical. I'm john dorsey do something about this. And i get a lot of attention for that. But when i talk about the debate and doing things differently and with more grace and kindness. I genuinely mean it because we will be causing and using our words to hurt somebody to basically encourage people to do to be causing themselves harm and and i can't keep we can't keep a lot. We can't keep waiting for there to be another suicide or another incident before we before we say are behind. Then we remember for two weeks and let me figure. Oh yeah george floyd and then back we can't. We can't keep doing that and that's because we keep making about the individuals rather than the issue one hundred percent or the product of their environment. Let's talk about the fucking environment. Because god knows they're not the only person who thinks that thing or talks like that hundred percent. I mean christ. I almost killed myself in february. Because of how hard i got trolled. My boyfriend had to let forced me into a therapist office and get me on medication for like three months because i will save knit any open window. If i was going to just jump out the nearest window suicide legislation. I just was. I'm someone who has panic attacks. And then the panic attacks make me think like oh my god i need to just go right now but do not advice that to anyone out there. That's bad bad decision But that's what i was driven to. By how many lies being spread about me and how my family is being harassed and how it's being accused of like contributed caroline. Data tried nothing to do with like she'd reached out to me that we were fine. It was it led me to a point. And i think because people think of us as like cels they forget and this is not just for a privileged famous person. This may before an able bodied po non-disabled person or a a white put someone that you look at as privileged in some way and therefore lighter skinned As a person of color or black person like you will look at someone as having more privileges the new and therefore less likely to feel pain from your behavior. Be very very careful because you have no idea what someone's going through home and you have no idea that they are actually sometimes reading everything that you're saying you don't know what what what's going on at home if they've got the support it's it's it you use blessed to be able to be at home with the boyfriend who knows you could take you to get support and help. There are women who on the receiving end of abuse of babies by their partners. Exactly and then there's no access to mental about. We just don't know and this is why we don't win. The thing is as i say people. It's a that business because we're not even minding other people's business properly reno what's going on. I have an idea of. And i'm i'm very bright. Feats be talking about some of the consequences that you've sheds of off off the should receive this year because people need to know where it can gargle and we talk about our well. I don't even need. It comes up in our trainings. We've trained hundreds of women around the uk and around the world on on how to be safe online digital shelf currents Safety and we to kits on how to stay safe online and women will tell you their experiences of how people have made false claims to child support services stronger children's taking people have made false claims to the benefits officer trying benefits taken away. People have docks them them and as you said the repercussions for their family and friends. And that's what's hard when the police came into checks around here because of the frets that will be made about me. And i was account so the time my was public when i saw my mom's face. That's what made me cry. Because in somewhere like i'd felt my mother. She made such sacrifices for me to be here and work here and and be who i was and she was just thinking the worst that she lost was in some way you know seriously governor be harmed and i just i that was sort of the thing that just push me to the edge and i think people we need to know what we what we say online abuse. This wildly of our wealth around raising awareness is about getting people to understand the different forms and tax it takes and the different impact. It has we both think it's funny to dead name. Which is something that affects trans communities particularly about dragging umbrian op the previous identity. Strand sherman embarrass them when that happens in particularly conservative communities or anything or anything around sexual diversity in certain conservative communities but look on what what can happen and what has happened to individuals. Family is so sad. And that's what we have to raise the whereas all that so we don't become complicit in that whether directly or indirectly we have a serious crisis on our hands which is also get a little bit the individual we need to be talking about fucking out like real systematic change like real public dialogue about education online and holding me tech companies and companies as. We're talking about talking about individual cases. No one's holding the multi-billion as likes of mark zuckerberg and jack dorsey to account for what's happening on the platforms from the same. The same profits. They are making from our pain. I want to end on my and my right on miss. That women have been getting death threats from the beginning of autumn. Since they've been online it took the president right now the us to get covid for for platforms to make a statement to say. If you wish somebody that you've violating apart from the start to be taken down you fucking kidding me pitting. Wish me all the time. Wish you at the time i've seen it i just. I think this is the issue that we need to. We need to concentrate on holding power systems to account. I'm show my trust is in a black can't believe he said fucking way. You've mentioned the words digital citizenship a couple of times throughout this and it's one of my favorite times of your was. Can you just kind of around us off. Explain it to us and tell us how to be good digital citizens online. I call it. Tell you because i read. I'm learning but i can tell you what we can aspire to give some to it. I can people thinking. I'm a consensual citizen. Sometimes i do a fuck rob dishes. Citizenship is about understanding that we have rights and responsibilities. We have a right to be online and even some of those. What's being are currently being violated and under attack but with every right comes responsibility let the rights education means we. Should we should be responsible. I mean i probably could have been climate samoa teachers at school but we should be responsible and it's about understanding that the online space is an extension of our off. My community is not this virtual world. it's not binary. Fame is in competition in the offline world. It's one big extension and therefore just like your flan space where we have to play our par- whether it's community activism listen picking whether it's sentiments inventions on the chief because it's annoying man being harasser there is also that responsibility on us and the same message is offline that we hold the powers that be accountable. Whether it's your member of parliament member of congress your representive whoever is We can also do that of tech companies and we know that we know that people are interested is because they're fed up of seeing things on their platform if up of not having reports they made of violations on the platform not being taken take into account so we know that people care. It's just that people need to know how to haul tech companies to account how to hold. Mp hotel companies to account and this will digital citizenship is the week get district citizenship rights. The next two to three years now. We can really change the coverage. I've action of where things are going. But if we don't more and more women are going to be a beautiful night. Suicide rates are going to go through the roof. The nhs before covid nineteen were already overwhelmed. The increase in cases of ptsd and other mental health illnesses in young people. It was alright into social media and mental health. We are going to see more people. I'm particularly women and martin barn people marginalized communities leave careers latte politics like the entertainment industry like journalism like teaching like so many things. Because they don't want to the on on abuse and the vilification that's happening and i won lines basis and it will mean a massive setback for human rights a massive setback for democracy and it will mean our spaces online spaces of being hijacked and i hope that in the years that i have left on this earth before hopefully idris elba's ready to have Children with me lucky. Lucky i hope that i can awake in some cases to want to take back their online spaces and make one hundred percent so all said and so that means question yourself before you press send godmanis need to continue to practice that try to avoid quote tweeting And i sometimes. I do it but any now when i feel as though it's someone verified i need to just create a civil discussion with and i never encourage anyone to go off to that person. In fact i asked them not to Be very careful about what you like you know. Be very very careful about what you like. Because it shows off on other people's timelines highlights that tweet to other people's timelines so not only. Does it empower got tweet and that message. That maybe i mean orbit bitchy or unkind spreading a rumor about someone that is part of your digital citizenship. That is positive footprint. You are accountable for whatever you endorse. We've been learning a lot about complicity this year. Just because you haven't said something but you've liked somebody does that's just a cowardly type of bullying. It's still bullying is still poorly. And just because you've seen abuse and you scrolled away you also complicit. We need to help report the abuse so on our website on fixed the glitch dot order uk. We've got a resource on the means a law which is ways that you can be good active by sunday's online and we encourage people to report the abuse to reply to the post envisioning as originally intended because the dna troll dna organized. Trolling is distract. The original message for example. If i say hashtag butler matter you have some dick as that will be like about blue lives but what about all is but what about wildlife and then you you you think you are able to have a civil conversation with them but you see the profile of the troll. Somebody's four accounts and setting up in all type of twenty twenty. Did not wanting to have a dialogue with you. I'm blessed wanted to distract you from the issue and so awful replying to pose as originally intended helps. Derail the attempts to try and distract from the original intentional posts. We can also encourage that person to documents obese because usually when you're on the receiving end of abuse never feels like it but usually it's one Ten accounts and if you help if you can help documental you do document that gave racer website which is free for people to use and and has helped to build a case for prosecution and it helps you to see the patterns but typically say you pinnacle party your of all of sudden you've all documents and and you start seeing. Oh somebody's posting a certain time. Well somebody's talking to insert candidates while someone's talking to satisfy. He helps build a case that would have to be able to clean up our social media. Totally get that. It's not fair emotional labor on us this beside that's the way society goes and the important thing which is which is rings. A lot of mental health is send them a resource of a guide or some advice or a post that that will help them feel better about the situation is going on. That will reassure them that they've experienced motto k. That will help them. Think about self care that will help them. Maybe take some time off speed to somebody else speak to them. Who's seven the resuls because you literally could be saving a life and those are really easy steps around active by is that we see more of what we can do line but then aas proactively as well being careful what we upload on our own platforms and really seeing as i'd into the community and i didn't talk to the team pollution to the platform where we actually adding positively and chris a coastal and role modeling that behavior. We wanna see i again i. I'm not saying that we're gonna all now everybody online molest role more than how we were how we politely politely. And civic civil simply best. What i'm trying to say. I disagree online without descending into this massive fire and this massive like battle of the of the two. Because you know what's going to happen. The media pick your media constant reporting on spots the happen on social media and then making it this whole thing about excesses acts and then it becomes a massive distraction. From what would the issue. And i just massively want to encourage people to just check our website. I'm probably biased. But he's he's one of a kind in how how it doesn't victim blaming how it supports people on my but also how in coverages on my we've just plan of talk on particular on flat women managing online and how allies can also support that women and it staffy to run compensation committee one conversations with. You'll find more people can't sale. What did you know that black women more likely to be abusive. What did eighty percents statistic cindy absolutely we in our covid nineteen reports where i had the hunch that if we're going to do lockdown and we're we're going to be online online visa's gonna increase. We did a report and it proved the hypothesis that forty six percent of women. And thank you re tweaking. The survey six am experienced some form of online abuse during lockdown. That was one into minute. But when you look at black minorities women and non binary people it went up to fifty percents and it and it was cited by thirty Sort of people said it had increased in the last twelve months so online space is going towards a terrible date trajectory. We will have to pay. Part includes tech company but it definitely starts with our spouse one hundred percent on remember the kids sheltering. And so we are shaping the future generation and if we don't want them to participate in the gross behavior. I think about that all the time i'm like. Oh my god what five kids one day and they look back and see that. I said this. I've got delete. I think we really need to be accountable for the world in which we not only live in the world in which we are building Thank you so much. What is the website that people can go to to follow and find all of these brilliant resources. Thank you so all website. It's www fixed the glitch dot org and you can follow us on. Follow us on all social media glitch uk underscore on twitter instagram and facebook. And i look forward to connecting some of you guys in a very civil manner imagine if my audience just trolls the shitter show you believe can i just won't do you weigh right now. I weigh hope and resilience grace and love address alba under love of the word. Dickhead i dick. Had in in both in terms of crossing the hell of evil also in terms of endearment to Well i do. I look forward to continuing our friendship and alliance and it's nice to finally meet you face to face nice. I respect the work. You do so much i back you all the way and cannot tell you how much i have learned from this woman and how inspired i am boy. I really really think you should follow her and her work. Because i think it's going to be one of the few areas that becomes vitals. 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228. Sharon Salzberg (meditation and mindfulness teacher)  on balance

Think Again

52:06 min | 1 year ago

228. Sharon Salzberg (meditation and mindfulness teacher) on balance

"I want to tell the truth for once as if it's even possible without all of the core dovan geometry about how there was never never a container that could fit all the love and all the emptiness side tried to stuff inside of it. Hey there this is Jason Guts. You know that scene in the Matrix where neo plugs his brain into a computer and learns martial arts in like five seconds. The past five years have been sort of like that for me. I've read about a book the week and I'm not a fast reader and I've sat down with many of my intellectual and creative heroes to talk about pretty much everything on my show. Think again. A big thing podcast. It's it's been an education and how to listen and so much more but now it's time for something new a real creative leap of faith on May Twelfth. I'll be launching my new podcast clever creature for each episode. Alright a song and a short story both inspired by a random word picked out by an algorithm. Could that word be buttocks absolutely absolutely at good. Whatever it is I gotTa Roll with it? There's no place to hide. I have so much more to share with you. Special guests audience participation. But for now all you clever creatures closet creatives out there. Please subscribe to clever creature wherever you get your podcast like love when in some thank. I'm ready yeah. Guess might be time to the ABC box of smile. Hi there. I'm Jason Godsend. You're listening to pink again. A big thing podcast. I rarely open facebook these days and whenever I do it reminds me harshly and immediately. Why why don't the other day? The first thing facebook showed me was opposed from a good old friend a guy I know to be thoroughly kind and decent in real life it said the world is on fire. It's not about your personal journey of self discovery. I understood where he was coming from. But it pissed me off on the list no. I didn't leave a comment. Not until now the world might be on fire but we are not firehoses. The world is us so everything we do. Good bad and in between depends on what we know about people which starts starts with knowing ourselves in other words it is about your personal journey of self discovery. I'm here today with Sharon. Salzberg in the seventies with her colleagues Joseph Goldstein Steen and Jack Cornfield. She was instrumental in bringing Theravada Buddhism to the West for over four decades since she's been teaching and writing warm wise and witty books on meditation. Russian and mindfulness. Her latest is real happiness. A twenty eight day program for realizing the power of meditation now three updated and revised for its tenth anniversary. Welcome to think again. Thank you so much. I mean maybe we can start with that phrase about the world on fire. We're in time where indeed the world is on fire in in many ways literally and figuratively and sort of how that relates to the personal journey of what he's calling self-discovery or what Buddhism my call self release or forgetting. Well I I agree. I think the world is on fire and you know sometimes the image people have meditators or mindfulness practitioners. This is somebody really withdrawn. Who's just not aware even of what's going on around them right some chores certainly very passive and I think the definitions although correct correct of mindfulness are easily misunderstood? Mindfulness means being with what's happening without judgment right. You know it sounds kind of indolent or mean. What do we do in the face of a dictator for you know accepting things the way that they are like? What can that mean in a world world where you see harm being created and sawn so it's not an easy answer but I think understanding what we're feeling knowing how to come from a better motive seeing where our fears are all those things that are products of being aware and mindful? Are things that we're only help us in responsiveness to whatever whether it's in our family our community and in the world at large because when I think of putting out fires I think think of reactively running around and we're never at our best in terms of planning or in terms of right action or anything else when we're in that situation. Yeah well. Buddhist psychology. Interestingly enough anger is like into a forest fire which burns up its own support. So it's not a question of like like not wanting to feel anger we feel what we feel and even in that system. There's a positive side to the anchor. which is the energy you know? It's the opposite of passivity but cut their great negativities to it can burn up. Its own support. It can kill its host forest fire. Anchor can leave us very far from where we want to be. You know we're just like swept up in some action so we don't see many options. We don't have much perspective but we feel what we feel you know and so we we need to be able to take that feeling and extract the energy which is so positive and not get caught in the burning. Yeah I mean in this question Russian of passivity I mean. I know that when I first encountered Buddhism when I first started reading about Buddhism split that the audience may or may not be aware of between the this idea the of ultimate reality and like relative reality right and at the ultimate level. They're talking a great deal about you. Know when you think about enlightenment when you think about Nirvana Oh now you're talking about getting past desire. You're talking about getting past attachment. You're talking about getting past essentially anything that we would recognize as life and it still gets for loving kindness compassionate. That's where that's where I'm going. That's where I'm going because you became an I interested in sort of how this happened and we can talk about this a little bit but you you kind of became the Queen of Meta Meta is your thing and that is the loving unkindness practice among the teachers that I know of. Yeah how love in that sense loving kindness for yourself. Loving kindness for others is not attachment alliance with the idea desire listeners. Yeah well the language is always tricky because this is all translate railway right right so desire can actually be different words incense Or poly we translate them laws desire but there's a a meaning of desire that is intention analogy. It's motivation like WanNa make a difference in this community or I wanna what's that word in politics Chanda Chanda Chanda. So it's it's like a strong intention -ality okay and then is the word desire that's greed you know right exactly restore thirst. Yeah you know so. So they're very different states but we use the word desire for both of them. So right you hear something like desire listening and you think it's like a baked potato or something you know the who wants a life like that right. It's very un-american is very slow maybe not even human but it's not what it appears you you know because attachment is also difficult. Were especially these days with Western psychology. Tach moment you know attachment theory about the good. That's right it's a good thing you want secure attachment. You don't want whatever insecure a few others that you don't right and that makes sense but it's not the way that the word attachment is being used which is much more about kind of control which never works attachment is bad. said it said to be the root of suffering which which is different than the kind of moral judgment of like. Oh you're so attached. You know it's sort of like in the in the Jesus story the idea of like Jesus's mother coming to him him and him saying basically. I don't know you. You have that sense that you know the Buddha after enlightenment reaches a state of transcendence where in there there isn't that kind of specific human attachment and that's something I mean. I don't think most of us who are practicing. Meditation and Mindfulness are necessarily expecting to become come enlightened in this lifetime or necessarily any other. But that's the kind of non attachment that is hard to swallow. It's hard to imagine not caring hiring about anything except the liberation of other beings. Well I'm not sure 'cause obvious projecting into the Buddhist mind you know which which is just projection but I'm not sure it plays out exactly like that. Okay they're also passages in the texts. For example the Buddha had to chief disciple SAR patron Galana whom he was very close to and all the stories and legends. They died within short time of one another. The the Buddha said something reflecting on their jazz. Something Cyclists Sun and the moon have left the sky so he mourns them specifically there. It was something about where I always come up with this poignancy. It's like isn't it. Poignant he didn't say this bundle of electro biochemical all components with some might states thrown in pass rate right. It was something much more human than so I I I think. Clearly he was not attached in the way we get attached but I don't know that he was uncaring or unfeeling or rights. Didn't have some kind of you've we would call a human connection. I also think a lot about how in our culture and the culture was raised in. There is so much respect respect given to passion of any kind in any form passion to be a star passion for whatever and the kind of happiness that you're talking about in this book and I think the term real is the word real is important here real happiness. That's a very different thing right. Well I think it requires kind of balance silence. That's based on wisdom. You know not pushing away or rejecting anything but really seeing where wisdom Texas and and concentration takes us and presence silence takes us so for example I mean there are plenty for many people plenty of beautiful things that happen joyful things that happen but we hardly take him in because we're distracted or thinking of something else or we have a standard and it's not meeting that standard in. I often tell story about my friend thing. He made that area in Washington. DC where concentration of cherry trees and when the Cherry Bowl Eh. When we went there just thought wow? It's so beautiful delicate pink blossoms and some many of them and then my friend and said Oh no it's passed the peak and other now. I'm having a really crummy experience. This isn't good enough. I missed the peak. You know so. They're all kinds of reasons reasons. Why we don't take in what is actually happening? Anyway which is wonderful and then of course you know we tend to have a really distorted needed relationship to pain. If it's our own were ashamed of it. We want to hide it. We blame ourselves. I think it's a disgrace if it's someone else's this we'd rather like High Dam you know. Tuck them away somewhere so you don't have to see it. And it takes a lot to let go of those assumptions options and reactions and moved to a place of compassion. But it's possible and that's one of the things I like best about your writing and teaching and I. I think this is probably just very true to who you are and how you had to learn as a practitioner but like there's a lot of like understanding of all the different ways that I don't WanNa say what got a certain type of person but maybe a certain type of person can get all tangled up inside themselves judgmental lost on the path confused about how to meditate win to meditate etc etc.. This goes back a little bit to what you were talking about earlier is like why did love and kindness become so important to me. Yeah you know the word. Mindfulness this implies not just knowing what's going on but knowing certain way so you're not clinging to it you're not condemning it or trying to push it away and you're not spacing out so this matches one in the Buddhist psychology or like the three root problems we have which is grasping are holding on pushing away anger fear and what's it called delusion which in this case is like indifference with does neutral ordinary moments. We just space is out were numb or certain people you know. We don't have a particular composer here when we look through them. You know they become objects. That's delusion mindfulness is said to be the antidote to greet hatred and delusion so that implies no matter what's arising in your experience it becomes your object of mindfulness joy sorrow anger delight. Whatever it might be that becomes predominant as you're sitting there and meditation and becomes the object of meditation because you're looking at it in that certain way you don't just know that this sorrow you're not freaking out about it right now? You're you're not hating it and so on. Now that's hard. What does it mean to look at something? You've avoided for a long time or you've been told Oh don't feel that or and what seems seems especially hard is what does it mean to simultaneously observe and be in the stream the unfolding arms basically how how how are you reflecting on an investigating something without removing yourself from the stream of time that it's in you know like such that the next moment his happening already to some extent you are removing yourself is a certain quality of space but it's not like an icy distance and you're watching the process so for example the first thing we look for is the add ons. You know I'm always gonNA feel this all a mailing one who's ever felt this right right and try to come back to the original feeling. Let's say it's fear so you feel it in your body you're not particularly thinking. Is this because my parents parents divorced you. Feeling what is it manifesting as right now in your body and then you kind of watch the fear movie so this is the place where you're not exactly in it but you're not trying to make it go away so what I've seen which often talk about looking at my own. Fear is is that despite the world's pronouncement that we're afraid of the unknown. I'm actually afraid when I think I do know and can be really bad stories. I tell myself stuff I this is going to happen. Then you lose the apartment that you can never know place say New York then you realize that even when I'm like in that arc of anxiety and and I remind myself you know what you don't know right then this space and then this actually freedom from the fear so that was an important thing for me to see my meditation tation because Asahi Meditation that I do that. You know right right and then I have a tool you know. I feel a certain thing happening. I go wait a minute. You don't know That's difficult to do. Obviously you know to sit and be with fear well and what seems like the most hardcore level of that. I've been reading John CIA. Aw lately for the audience Thai forest monks and he's he has a very funny and different style of teaching. But you know the extreme version of that what is the like the meditations on death the meditations on decay of the body like getting to a situation or a point or somehow somehow allowing yourself to recognize that everything that is yours will be lost and still somehow being okay that that that feels even more are difficult to swallow or further away. Somehow I think to most of us than than the idea of learning to kind of love with love ourselves and sit with everyday fear. Well well it is a lot although I I know so many people who work in hospice volunteer for hospice and they tend to be really happy. You know like clearly not a depressing experience you know something very uplifting and freeing about it anyway so you know in that movement toward being more able to be with this whole range of things that arise with some greater balance. I realized pretty quickly that one of the things that was difficult for me in terms of balance was that I was so mercilessly. Judging myself shouldn't feel this else's feeling this way feeling this you know Kimmel with India feeling what if anyone found out this is what you're just angry and somewhat famous for marched up up to my first teacher who is this going and looking at him and saying. I never used to be an angry person before I started meditating thereby laying blame exactly where I felt I I want him. You know clearly. It's all his fault angry and he laughed but for me it was really like my first time. It real introspection inspection and so there was all these layers feelings and that's not wrong. It's not bad it's just difficult to be with in a more open in an open hearted way and so loving kindnesses for many many people including me certainly a powerful ingredient to put into the mix so the year awareness becomes more open more relaxed more loving and we should you know explain briefly for the audience that you know what is meant by loving kindness or or metta meditation. You are you know. Sometimes you're using phrases like may I be happy. May I be safe. You're I usually meditating on on loving kindness for yourself and then gradually over time or even within a given meditation radiating outwards to two benefactors neutral. People people that you're uncomfortable with in some way and then ultimately though the whole world I guess all beings. Yeah I mean mindfulness meditation meditation and loving kindness. Meditation are very supportive of one another but they are different methods You know I think that's important to point out that they say sometimes sometimes that like omnipotent the there's a scripture in which the Buddha says that that unopposed necessity the breath meditation can itself be the whole of the path if sometimes understood that in terms of you know that the Meta component capacity is is this sort of self acceptance that happens as we. We learned to be with the breath as we learned to relinquish a certain amount of control and that kind of thing so I was smiling before when you're talking about is chop because he's here. He came to visit us in Barry at the insight Meditation Society and he was such a riot. It's like my earliest teachers. Had all either been Burmese. These are studied in Burma Sudan certain lineage and certain approach. You know the Thai forest tradition is quite different for one thing. It was a reform movement in Thailand. Then let it become kind of more state religion and Buddhism you know and so they you know the followers went back into the the far back to basics real simplicity and they're much like in Burma In the school in which I mostly studied there. Were the things like walking meditation where you tend to walk slowly after a while not always but there there are certain aspects of it we really slowdown it. Kind of looks like someone doing Tai Chi or some right. It's incredibly weird Tie Farce tradition. They don't tend to do that. was like very relaxed very natural. Just be natural in what you do in some schools they have. You tried to sit in meditation for longer. John showered save have seen chickens sitting on nests days on end. It does nothing you know. I understand you had people like sweeping or golding the monastery life just he came to Barry and we had a whole bunch of people sitting there are like myself had strong experience variance and Burmese schools. They be slowly slowly lifting their leg and he would come up to them and say. I hope you get to leave the hospitals. They seem very speaking of different traditions. You know your book offers and you're teaching generally offers is lot lots of different ways in and I know certainly the Buddha does in the scriptures you know different. Skillful means different approaches for different people but when I wrestle with have wrestled with over the years is kind of the relationship between sort of ease self acceptance loving kindness on the one in hand and lake discipline and like right effort on the other. I mean I think Americans generally have some struggle with us and I know that like in the seventies is when you all started teaching right after the sixties counter cultural movement. That was probably something a lot of your students were. They were not necessarily wanting to be disciplined. And wonder how you you think about that balance about how somebody achieves stability in the practiced especially if there's someone that struggles with trusting in discipline plan themselves. I think balanced looks different at different times and it's important to remember. The goal is balanced. You know it's a balanced relationship to whatever we're we're experiencing because that's where the wisdom can be born. You know we're not fighting what's going on. But Wilson sucked into it right and because of that particular relationship tore your experience we can see much more into the heart of it. We can understand more and more but balances the goal and that's hard to remember so for example. It's not uncommon for people to have a kind of over heroic experience. I never let myself grieve. The SARS of my child's. I'm going to sit here in pain so I get to the other and I know this is like a traumatic memory. But it's important that I hang in there. You know our stop sleeping being you know like people get into these really striving staying what you might call maybe a kind of a spiritual asceticism like on the for the audience audience that harking back to the fact that the Buddhist spends a couple years with really intense ascetics and then ultimately find this middle way kind of middle way discipline. Yeah yeah no exactly and so. I've seen a lot of that people including myself getting into that state and militant. Yes so in. In those times are those phases balance really looks like soften just accept what's going on even embrace. What's going on you know sniping fighting? So hard and put bounced doesn't always look just that way you know there are other times when we're a start tomorrow you know or whatever right. We're procrastinating. Estimating we don't care what the breath feels like or you know second our energies just not there. If you're meditating and you're falling asleep this could be a point. We decided decide to stand up and do some walking. It's not because you hate yourself for your experience. You're just saying I need to look for balance and another way you know so if you really indifferent to your experience a and you have hearted you don't need to hate that state either but the balance is going to come for when you say for the next week I'm GonNa Practice Twenty minutes a a day doesn't matter if it's the last thing at night I do before I go to sleep. I'm has to be reasonable. You can't say for the rest of my life right practice. Eighteen hours a day. You UH put some structure in place and you kinda get the energy from the I mean. That's why sometimes I have to retreat from say John Cha and and go listen to you because like because there is a lot of this heroism in in that tradition. It's just like people want the easy way they want A. It's a different country different time different situation but you know it can become daunting to the point where you don't WanNa do anything. I know like my Burmese. One of my Burmese teacher. Get your side. Who Pandita? Who came to Barry in nineteen eighty four to teach this three month retreat in it was very tough and he was really Fierce you know intense and and it's also speaks to your question about. How do you find the place of right effort? We were meeting him six days a week. Please he's very short meetings. We call interviews. Will you just describe your practice. New Get some feedback and one of his favorite things to say if he ends up an interview is try harder and later years when I was assisting him more than sitting myself. I'd like be out the door into the hallway. Because I knew that person Jason was going to be sobbing. What do you mean try harder? I'm trying so hard you know once in that first retreat the three months when I was sitting he had the door open to the room. He was doing interviews so I could hear the person ahead of me and what they're saying walking up the stairs and I heard her pundits. Just say this is too much effort you know and I was. It was fell backwards downstairs. What never says to me but what I one of the things I rediscovered in that course was that right efforts not a matter of intensity? It's a matter of frequency like if you're mindful you're mindful and you get completely spaced out but then you begin again and you're mindful and you're mindful. You're adding more moments of mindfulness in around. I don't know why it's like this for so many of us. And I don't want to generalize and say it's an American thing I mean first of all. I don't think that I don't think that American parents have higher expectations for their children than say Thai or Burmese me as parents. I just don't but but like why it is. The issue is about authority. It seems to me it's about. Who's telling you do it like I don't have any problem with right effort? I don't have any problem with sitting for hours on end if it's me telling me to do it but if it feels like there's any other voice he's in my head. That isn't mine telling me that I'm not making enough effort. That's that's when you end up in tears. Well I mean that. That's that's clear you know. There's a cultural thing you know. Joseph Goldstein was in the Peace Corps in Thailand. Before he went to India he was a science client. Some posh school in Bangkok you know teaching English and he talked about his students coming into the classroom and bowing to him because he was is the teacher. Sure it's a culture of respect and is not a perfect culture you know by any means but it's different in that regard and when when I was in Burma you know Buddha statues first of all the Buddhist always talked about having been a human being. It's not like supernatural. Being he represents the best of a person terms of love and compassion. And you're saying you know essentially it is so when you look at a Buddha statue it's supposed to be a reminder of your own potential. You know because of that like Buddha statues are venerated. The country like Burma make an ashtray out of it. So you know we're shoes around. I mean you bow the Buddha statue. You know you treat it as some respect and we don't like that often it seems defying worship. But in truth it says something about yourself when you have a sense of the deeper meaning but nonetheless you no like I've seen those monks come to the states and they cannot believe you know like a hat sitting on top of Buddha head or something like that you know. It's like what what it is different. Approach think again is brought to you today by Simplisafe simplisafe home security is like getting commercial official grade enterprise level security but for your own home thing about the security fortune five hundred companies use. They need to know police are going to be on the scene immediately. This is is exactly the kind of security you get with simplisafe. If there's a break in they use real video evidence to give police and I witness account of the crime and that means police dispatch up to three hundred hundred fifty percent faster than for normal burglar alarm with simplisafe. 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How how you had to work with that? It's an odd thing in that you know. It's almost like being public for having been an introvert. uh-huh or people knowing your name because you sat quietly you know. Yeah that's an odd thing you know but I mostly sensitives just a product of the years. Because it's been a lot of years. You know incite meditation. Society began seventy six anniversaries. You know I don't know that I mean given the given the visibility now. The new prominence of mindfulness and meditation APPs. And whatever whatever you know this is a long history. Yeah Yeah you know I came back from Indian seventy four and as Joseph and Jack Cornfield came back from Thailand the same year ear. You know and Ramdas. was you know back from India. He was very instrumental in Joseph actually starting to teach in this country. We're all neuropathy institute in Boulder in the summer of seventy four. It's when I opened Ramdas was teaching like this giant mega class of like thousand people and he had just teaching the little meditation subgroup. That was the beginning And at that time it was like everything all mixed together people just had gone and gotten bits of the Pete pieces of Hinduism and some people and whatever I mean. Some people is very different for everybody. Jack had really been a student of the Thai forest tradition. Much more than the Burmese tradition and were much more from the Burmese tradition. But even within that you know I think teacher personality finality has a great deal to do with it in that you know some of my teachers were very kind of loose. You know in a way like Like this one teacher miniature who was really Joseph's main teacher somebody asked him. This is before my very first meditation retreat. But we're saying same compound. Somebody said to him I feel like walking into town through some distance away and getting some Chai can I go an injury said Oh just go mindfully and go. Anka came in. He locked the gate for that retreat. The gate was literally locked. And if I had only been a student from the beginning I know where to go mindfully I I just want to get some gotten some Chai and I needed you know kind of like. Here's the schedule not leaving the grounds not engaging with sales people. You're right right I I really did need structure from then to now. A lot of things have changed. What do you think why is are some of the biggest differences in terms of how people embrace and engage with this these teachings at this point I mean I know we listen us and on the phones and such but more substantially maybe I mean I think it's fascinating you know it's like I went to India when I was eighteen years old? I'd never even been to California before literally. I wanted so badly to learn how to meditate and just didn't see. It was going to school in Buffalo New York and I was just back there after like like you know fifty years and to give her talk her different. You know. It's like speaking of mindfulness fair or something. Anyway that mindfulness program with the law school in Mindfulness. You know it's like so different but I went to India so that talks about incredible desire desire to learn and short willingness to it was huge arranged sort of study in college so it's actually actually kind of amazing being back at the university. I think who I owe them everything. They sent me to India and now someone has an APP or their Fran. Dan Right gives them a book and they didn't even want it or you know like so different and I don't know nobody knows the difference. It's GonNa make that. You need it to have that strong motivation. You don't need assault good. I think you know because in the end people should have axiom or the Dharma spreads is the better kind of thing I mean. I don't know that there's anything a teacher can do. Other than teach and share share the knowledge. But I sometimes wonder sometimes get I I think reasonably paranoid about the structures that we've built in this world including you know the phones and the and the social media and the corporations and so on and the ways that there was an interesting book written by a friend of Mine Ruth. Whitman look looking at this issue of how corporations nations of kind of like taken in mindfulness and I mean on the one hand I completely understand the more mindful people are the better on the other hand and these structures have a way of kind of like subsuming an away neutralizing things like making them something different and and in a way when when the thing becomes commercialized. An industrialized on that scale. It becomes a thing that some people who might really need access to it are going to reject on that on that score like. Oh yeah whatever right. I'm sure your work takes you into corporations. I mean. It's a huge issue. I you know I do condemn on the side of the more. Mindfulness the better and I don't know that the organizations are gonNA subsume the teachings any more than anything else L.. Because I would rather mike concern is actually a little different. Okay then the venue or even the technology which I happen to like but my concern is really an. It's because of my very old fashioned background. It's really about the qualifications of the teacher. You know like I had a conversation the station with a friend who was talking about people in the military perching her about mindfulness which is another whole issue. Qatari fully bomb the enemy kind of thing. Well I mean it's that some level I mean it's like I've watched the the trajectory of that starting with of these people coming back and they've got massive trauma. Maybe mindfulness can help until everyone felt good about that a- sure and then somebody said what. If it's a preventative you know. We've got a military spending it right. People are getting traumatized. Is there like a Seidel. What if it is a preventative? You say well No. You can't start til you come back in Iraq. So then they started teaching in basic training. But then you know all the accusations started. The army's subsuming it. It's mindful sniper and right right right you know but I've watched this you know. It's a very complicated issue. I often think about the fact that like for the most part. It's not the case but there are times and moments in our lives is where like a lion defending scub- one must take fierce action. You know hopefully. It doesn't happen to most of us most of the time but if your home is under attack for example that kind of thing you know and in that case I think undoubtedly having this training having having you know calm tom focused. Mindfulness you know would would improve your response would make you better able to act wisely. That's the finding is from the neuroscience Sousse setting it that executive function really is in the hands through mindfulness in the military people. So that means they say fewer viewer massacres. You know you don't have that kind of Migdal hijack anyway. That's but the conversation. The station is having with friend you know. She was saying that there was some people in the military she was talking to but they really wanted military people people to be doing the teaching okay and so she was wondering if people were going to start like a train the trainers programme so I said well. How long would it training bates meditation teacher? And she said eight hours and I said you can't do that and admittedly I come from a very old fashioned world where my teachers told me to teach. I didn't even think they could. I didn't have kind of formal training. Buddy also had a community of just of Golden Jack Cornfield and I we had each other and so nobody was kind of spun off alone. You know or feedback back and no help and so I would rather see somebody with a lot of years behind them or a lot of depth behind them teaching reaching on an APP right then someone else teaching on an APP and the technology is actually allowing that voice to be heard more. Yeah I mean I can say that you know I mean I. I encountered these teachings maybe twenty five years ago but like my a more stable practice definitely began about Um know how whenever that head space APP came out with that guy. Andy putty comb. Who I think is pretty good good and you know I wasn't crazy about ultimately the game of vacation and that sort of like you've unlocked the next level of wisdom or whatever you know that seems a bit but you know it was an entry point and from there? Then you know it's gotten deeper. I'm really curious for yourself at this point. What is is your practice and is it still evolving or you know it's always like what are you doing when you move? I would hope so but I mean you know in your meditation Mike. What do you do you lead retreats? And that's what that is. I went to Burma in eighty five and I did a three month. Intensive retreat read in loving kindness and from that point on it was about four years. We're my only practice was love and kindness. Okay whether I was on retreat are sitting at home almond these days not some much much more. I just sit every day. I try to sit in the morning and it's much more like either. It's is an open awareness practice or go back to the breath at my nostrils who was my very first technique in January nineteen seventy one. I'm like that for some reason going back there. But mostly it's like have opened awareness practice just being aware forever Sarai. So you're kind of you're looking. At feeling sensation body audie thoughts et Cetera. And I tend to do loving kindness. I have is resolved. Do it every time I'm waiting. I can't every mode of transportation. Shen is waiting taxis airplanes and walking down the street. There are many opportunities for waiting in New York. Yeah yeah so but I keep thinking. I shook up back into more formal loving kindness. It'd be interesting to do it at this point point so I don't know where it's going next going back to your book. I mean there are so many ways to break down the path but the kind of sequence in the book is is concentration than mindfulness than loving kindness. Yeah may maybe we can talk about how that how that moves so the First Section is on concentration which is basically choosing an object of awareness gathering your tension around it and then when your mind wanders. He's learning to gently. Let go and come back and just let go and come back I love is it Co.. Jack's image of like it's an image. I've heard many times of the puppy that editors off the Mat and your training at the come pick it up and bring it back and building on that we kind of open awareness somewhat. What especially emphasizing? Mindfulness of the body could be walking meditation. That could be body scan like moving your attention right that your body the and just kind of becoming aware in New York apartment you can walk back and forth slowdown somewhat. You know. But that's the ideal were you can walk in a normal pace outside and don't slow down. Look to where you know. There are various ways in which we look at our are experiencing pain or experience pleasure in the body and and then the next toll section is about my phone sivy motions and thoughts being able to create that some more spacious approach. So we're very tune into what's happening. We're very connected or not lost in it right nor we pushing shing it away and and then the last section is loving kindness because it is distinct method even though as a flavor kind of ingredients. It's there throughout the emphasis in the actual design of loving kindness is to deepen it and I think about I think a lot about how there. There's that one story that the Buddha at a moment when he was coming to the middle way he reflected on this moment in his childhood when he had been in happiness basically beneath breath in the summer of beneath a tree and and then decided to use that as the entry way into the path and I mean. I've heard that talked about as also like absorption the first Jonah but it also to me is very much loving loving right. Yeah well I mean the their whole bunch of I don't know if you call them. Preparatory practices or foundational practices at the Buddha. Talked about so that when you went to concentrate wasn't such an ordeal or deal you know right and that includes generosity like in life you might be material. Generosity might mean smiling somebody or thanking them. You know it's it's just creating a kind of open spirit. Yeah and means morality so that we're not haunted say sitting there trying to focus on our breath breath thinking. Did I lie enough. You know maybe I better write clued. The other real estate agent New York apartments and Dan we just get frenzied paranoid overwrought when our actions have been kinda off. And so when I give yourself a break right with a saying in effect. Perfect and kind of stabilize your intentions in your life and get simpler get more truthful and your practice easier and then there's loving kindness right and so between generosity morality and loving kindness by the time you are working with concentration and much that's later facing nunnelee joy but suffering. Yeah you have this whole you've put all these building blocks in place. See your mind is kind of more. Open and supple and and I think that's that's also a place where one can get a bit confused because you know you talked to Joseph and some teachers and and I would think you probably that like sequence doesn't have to be rigidly adhered to at the same time. I found that when I initially initially tried to do metta meditation. It was totally impossible for me because with my thinking critical mind it was. It was all this stuff that I've heard you even talk about in Dharma talks of like WH- which person should I think of Oh that's not the right person. They're not really totally a benefactor. You know You know whatever and so I had to go back to the breath for a long time before I could like kind of anchor myself in that stability to be able to actually do that. Yeah no I think that's great 'cause Meta almost by definition will bring up a lot of energy. These are real people were thinking you know. It's not like like we're asked don't do like a composite picture of a homeless person in La Right Sanctuary homeless person. You know them where you've seen them we've read about `bout them they're like a real person and so- relationships are complicated and so often people will think you hurt my feelings that won't benefactor a factor or whatever we didn't talk for a couple of trae too high energy state you know like when there's a lot of thinking you know there's a lot of energy and that's good you don't WanNa lose the energy but it needs to be balanced with calm and concentration and so on because because I was sitting here thinking what if I were teaching you know I would think okay. He's got a lot of energy is great. Now let's focus on the concentrations since that simplicity repetitions structure area. And you can have both because you don't want only concentration because then it's like in loving kindness. Oh you're silently repeating phrases. You could be saying anything you know. You don't have a sense of the reality of being out there or you know right. Well that's right so so I mean that's how I ended up honestly back in the when I was first window shopping. That's how I kind of bounced off of Tibetan Buddhism and into the Pasta Theravada. Whatever is because they were so ornate with the like you know? Elaborate Pantheon of Gods and beings beings and imaginative exercises. Row was just like this is driving me nuts like I. I can't think of White Tara. I don't even. I can't hold that in my mind and so but the progression from the breath from basic Up to yeah I mean visualizing other people while at the same time doing doing these freezes which feels really artificial. I you know that's something that had to be learned has to learn. I think yeah yeah but seems learnable as opposed to well. What I've got here is a set of black cards that are called Oblique Strategies on? They were made by Brian. Brian Eno and the artist Peter Schmidt in nineteen seventy five and they just have freezes on them and what I think we should do is kind of pick one and opened open our minds to it and see where the conversation goes for the West. Few minutes gopher. What mistakes did you make last time? Yeah I'm giving you know help here share. What mistakes did you make last time? Aw I don't know what happened in the last lifetime. Yeah well I don't know what what last time is my mind went was mistakes I made when I first began teaching. Yes which was really you know like Being afraid to say I don't know and kind of taking refuge in doctrine somebody sits we what happens after after we die. I'd say well this period of transition you know I mean which is different than saying. According to the Buddhist teaching teaching or in the tradition they say in Tibetan tradition. They say this other thing you know it was like I. I was just laying out. Were you utterly. Orderly convinced yourself at the time or were you just scared scared. I mean I was convinced because I didn't think otherwise. You know I'm good at Indy Renault's Eighteen. You know I left. I started teaching. When I was twenty one man impetus sincere? You know it was slow. My worldview By that time you know the way saw things and I just didn't have enough conviction or courage to be able to say well I I don't really know but in this tradition they say this. I've learned that people don't expect not really there to hear me. Import my expertise as you know it tried to make connection to some inspiration So they can keep going. You know there for them themselves which is correct. It should be there for themselves. You know I've learned that I'm different from some of my colleagues. You know the world different from one another and that it just has to be that one is kind of authentic. You Know Ryan natural and you can't you can't model yourself on. Yeah that's a hard lesson right. You can't can't be you can't be anyone else but yourself. Yeah it is hard it is hard. Yeah maybe the hardest Sharon Salzberg. I have really enjoyed this hour that we've spent together. Thank you so much for being on the show with me. Thank thank you. That was the last original episode. I'll be doing think think again. But it's not the end of the road throughout February and March until March twenty second. I'm going to be running some some of my of my favorite shows from the past five years and I'll be listening back to them and adding some reflections so I hope you'll join me for those in the meantime to stay informed as to what I'm up to. Please come to my website. Jason God's Dot Com there's a pop-up firm where you can sign up for and occasional emails from me and if you have an adblocker you need to disable that so that it works. I'll be back next week with the first of my favorite picks and I hope you enjoyment panoply.

India Burma Jack Cornfield Dan Right New York Joseph Sharon Salzberg Barry facebook Thailand Thai forest ABC La Right Sanctuary Jason Guts Jason Godsend Jesus insight Meditation Society Brian Eno Washington Chanda Chanda Chanda
Robert Waldinger: ON How To Nourish Your Meaningful Relationships & The Power Of Quiet

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

1:14:16 hr | 1 year ago

Robert Waldinger: ON How To Nourish Your Meaningful Relationships & The Power Of Quiet

"My fascination was in what happens to people throughout their lives. What really happens to people? There's so much hype about what life is supposed to be like. I mean look at look at look at advertisements and look at social media. And you would imagine that everybody's happy and on vacation and parties all the time getting to follow someone's wants life over eighty years is such a privilege so we've been trying to build a deep relationship with each other it started with these formative videos and then you said Jay we need more. We launched the podcast which man I was speaking to you for thirty minutes to an hour every single week and got to amazing podcasts. A week and I'm thinking well how do we go a step further and so I found out from my friends that there's this new really cool new thing that I've been trying out. It's called a community phone number. Which means that you can actually text me? I'm being serious. So here's my number. I want you to write it down. Stop what you're doing right now and write this down. Three one zero nine nine nine seven four one seven seven. I'll say it again. Three one zero nine nine seven four one seven seven seven you can text me right now and the best thing about this. I can send you real time updates where I'm out what I'm thinking about reflections having realizations pictures and isn't it true that with friends you want to text them right. You don't email your friends. You don't just post on Instagram and hope your friends you text them when you wanNA share something so I want to do that with all of you so text me now. Three one zero nine nine seven four one seven seven. Hello everyone welcome back to on purpose. Thank you so much for tuning in whether you're listening or watching right now. I'm genuinely any so grateful that you're taking out time and energy in your life to growth to learn to serve. I think it's an amazing commitment that you make every single week and I just wanted to take a moment to acknowledge that I also wanted to say. I'm so thankful that you're sharing the insights on instagram on twitter on facebook. Trust me I see them. I try and share as many of them as I can but I love seeing that. You're gaining so many phenomenal messages from my interviews with incredible guests and the solo episodes. Yes I do every single Friday and I also read your reviews reviewers means so much to me. I'm always scanning and browsing through noticing. How much love unkindness? There is the thank you for allowing me to serve you in this way and today I'm really excited to introduce you to the guest. Today's guest is someone that I've followed for a very long time. I've quoted his research in Multiple Videos and in multiple coaching sessions. That I've done when I saw his name on this list where we currently currently are with the Arthur blank foundation in West Creek ranch in Montana when I saw his name I said I have to have him on the podcast. Because he's someone that I look up not so much. His Ted talk is one of the top ten most viewed. Ted Talks of all time which is phenomenal in itself but he's also a psychiatrist psychoanalyst and Zen priest. I can't wait to hear more about that. He's a professor of psychiatry at the Harvard Medical School and Directs the Harvard Study of Adult Development Elleman one of the longest running studies of adult life ever done. And that's the one that I've quoted show many times. His name is Dr Robert Waldinger. Robert Thank you you so much for doing this. It's a pleasure. Well very grateful to have you here as I said I mean every word I've definitely quoted in reference to your work so many times to be sitting here with us in honor of mine and I really appreciate it but I wanted to start with the first question about the study I just referred to. Would you've dedicated so so much of your life and work to. I'd love you to just introduce my audience to that. Study just to set us up of where it began and what it's really been resembling resembling sure so as you said as far as we know it's the longest study of adult life that's ever been done meaning. We started with a group of people all in one thousand nine hundred thirty eight and we followed them through their entire lives. It started actually as two separate studies a study the of Harvard College sophomores and a study of boys from Boston's poorest neighborhoods as far as the Harvard College Boys. Young men are concerned they they were two hundred sixty eight of them from the classes of nineteen thirty nine to nineteen nineteen forty two John Kennedy was a member of the study. Ben Bradlee who was editor of The Washington Post for so many a years at for example when the Watergate scandal broke and then mostly Ordinary people who went to Harvard and then went on to lead interesting but usually pretty regular lives the inner city boys a four hundred and fifty six of them were were selected because they were from really disadvantaged families and families with a lot of trouble and they were selected with the question region of. Why are these boys able to stay out of trouble? Why are they not able? Why do they not get in trouble with the law and become juvenile delinquent so it started out as a study of who avoids juvenile delinquency? And why and then these. Two groups of people were combined unstudied together starting in the nineteen seventies but initially. They were separate studies. That didn't even know about each other. Wow so they actually started a totally separate tone measuring something completely different to what you ended up finding and when did you get involved in the process. I got involved fifteen years ago. Okay I'm the fourth director and one of my heroes. A professor of psychiatry at Harvard was my predecessor and he took me out to lunch one day. And said how would you like to inherit inherit the study of adult development and I was dumbfounded and I said I don't know anything about aging because the men were pretty old by then and studied couples and he said let's study aging couples so the first thing we did together was to study late life marriage and how it affects our health. Wow and that was how I joined the study. That's fascinating. Yeah that's incredible. I'd love to explore a bit in your work with couples in research. If you don't mind as its as a slight tangent tell me about some of the most incredible things you've found from studying marriage and how it affected our well being one of the the things we found which was the most surprising to me was that arguing wasn't a problem in couples. We used to think. Think that if you argued a lot that it was a bad relationship and it was gonna break-up turns out that wasn't true that in many couples could argue a lot and be really tight and quite stable and other couples didn't argue at all but gradually broke up when we videotaped couples having a disagreement. The thing that clearly predicted who was going to stay together five years down down the road was how much affection they showed for each other so they could be arguing and really mad at each other as long as you saw that bedrock of affection. Yeah those were stable couples and the couples that didn't have much affection where the couples that were in more trouble. 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M. dot com forward slash purpose. Wow that's that's incredible. Yeah and I've I've seen that in other work as well where actually learning how to fight is such an important skill exact when actually our biggest biggest desire when it comes to arguments is thinking we have to run away or Bari. Something or hide away. We try and avoid conflict and I think conflict resolution or aw having tough. Conversations is such an important skill that we never get exposed to exactly in fact one of the big developmental tasks of a young couple goal is to learn how to handle disagreements right because every couple is going to have disagreements. So how do we handle them. How do we get to a point? Where one person doesn't win and the other loses but that that you get to a point where you can emerge from conflict stronger and certainly no weaker and what we found was that I actually the development of a couple relationship goes through a stage of learning how to resolve conflicts? And then ideally really. You no longer need to do that. You've figured that out and that as you get older. The developmental task for older couples is learning how to support each other. Because if you think about it as we get older we really need each other more and more like we need to lean on each other physically as well as emotionally as difficult things happen in our lives as illness starts to happen so actually when we started studying are older couples. We asked them to have an argument on videotape. They couldn't couldn't think of things to argue about it and we thought what's wrong with this picture and then we realized no no no. It's because they had already worked out how they were going to managed. That's why they lost it. That's why they lasted and what we found was that that the real real interesting point for older couples was we when we asked them. Could you talk about your biggest worry with your partner and to see how the partners supported them. That was a huge Window on how the older couples were doing. That's incredible. What kind of things did they say with? Their biggest worries is all well sometimes. It's really boring things like I don't know what to make you for dinner. Honey and those those were not the interesting conversations the interesting conversations were. I'm afraid that if I die I that you won't be okay by yourself or I'm afraid that if you die I I'll have to go to a nursing home or I'm afraid that when we die our children won't handle their finances. Well really big issues that then then they could talk about and often offer each other mutual support around and that must have been a powerful question for them to talk about. I did you find that at that stage of development where they quite vulnerable with each other or were they still these pockets of not not hiding anything but just you just. Don't think to talk about how you feel scared of sharing it. So you're absolutely right in what you're suggesting. which is that? Couples varied a lot like some couples could really be open with each other and get right down to basics and important issues and other couples were pretty closed off or sometimes one member of the couple could be very emotionally available and the other was pretty closed off so it varied but the healthiest couples. Were the ones who were it. Really emotionally there for each other. Yeah I've been saying around the argument point law. I've been repeating in a lot of forums that I've been in that when you arguing. Remember that it's not you against each other. It's both of you against the problem absolutely as I've been saying that I'm very competitive. I like winning. I enjoy winning and I've learned in my relationship with my wife that it's a lot more fun to win together because in a relationship if you win and your partner loses you both lose news and if your partner ends in you lose you both lose. The only way to win is to win together. Exactly what have you seen and I'd love to understand from you. Water those developmental steps that people can take to actually argue better or manage disagreements. Better great question so there are actually some good techniques and so we we find that many couples either go into couples therapy. Or there's some good books that couples can read that can help them and there are strategies you can use so for example example. What you said about realizing that you're you're both Trying to solve a problem that it's not arguing with each other to see who wins and who loses. But how do we manage this problem that once you make the problem the enemy if you will yes you're in much better shape There are some simple the language techniques so for example making is statements so instead of saying when you said that you were trying to make me mad or you hurt me us. We say you know when you said that I felt hurt and this is what it felt like to me. It felt like you meant this but then I'm not saying I know what you're thinking. I know what you're trying to do. I'm saying this is how I received it And then I give you a chance to tell me what you meant and then we can do some repair and we can do some getting to common ground. So they're they're variety of techniques techniques like that that are pretty easy to learn and that can really help change those awful conversations to one to where you both end up feeling closer. Yeah and I love that. Switch that you're making from Utah. I language because I think when we all saying you you you you you. We ended up making these like permanent statements based on a temporary event. And we start making these big accusations rather than articulating. How we feel yes? I'm we expressed anger and explain it and when people don't feel like your explaining something and we expect the other person to read don't mind and just know what we've been thinking about. It becomes very hard and so much gets lost in. I feel so I love that switch right. I think that's really powerful impractical for people. The other thing you just pointed out was this tendency we have to say you always do this or you never do this. And you always and you never ver- are terrible statements. Because nobody always does anything never does anything and so if we can stay with what are we just disagreeing about right. The how you didn't take out the trash when I asked you to. Let's just talk about that. Not You never help around the house and data Edwin. Yeah definitely I love that. Hope you guys are taking notes. If you're listening or watching right now. Those are three really practical steps and tips. That I'd love you to test out out this week. Experiment with your naturally GonNa have an argument and just put it in there just to start throwing these things in because you start to see how much they can benefit you and one of the big things wall we move forward from this argument point that I've been encouraging people is that you don't prepare for an argument in the argument so a lot of people say oh but Jay when I'm when we're fighting like I can't think of this stuff I can't remember I say exactly like the the sports player of the athlete doesn't prepare on World Cup Game Day or the matchday they're preparing beforehand so what I say to people is when your relationship is feeling strong when you having a good time. Use that time to discuss us. How you'd like to deal with disagreements because that's the time when you're steady that's the time when you're in the right sense of mind and state of mind and you can make decisions for look? I know we may argue about this. And I'd love for us to communicate in this way and if you prepared for that beforehand you're more likely to remember that's just my interest in an instinct on it because it's a great intuition and to that point. One of the things people should feel free to do is take a timeout. Yes so as you say you know. I can't think of what I WANNA think. Think of right now to say and sometimes it's just going in a bad direction and that's the time when you should be able to both of you to say look. Let's take a timeout. It's it's just not feeling good right now. Let's let's come back to this and then really come back to it. Yes like one of the maximums that I like sometimes is strike while the the iron is cold that when things are really hot. That's often when you say things you regret when you can't think of the right things or you can't say it as you mean to and and if you can take a timeout go away okay. How do I really want to explain this? Then you come back and you can. You can say more of what you want to say in the tone that you want to say it in and and do more constructive Building of the relationship again. That's beautiful. I love them really. Glad we got to address that together and now back back to the seventy five year study. I'm glad I'm really happy. I'm really happy. We got to go in that direction. I think it's a really positive powerful conversation and very practical when we look at this seventy five year study. What were your biggest fascinations when you got involved with it and then tell us a bit about the things that you found the surprising things and and the things that unionist are important for us? My friends absolutely love cycling. 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Not What do we remember because we often tell ourselves stories trying to remember back to what happened in our lives and also so Not What do we think ought to happen. But what's life really like for people. There's so much hype about what life is supposed to be like right. I mean and look at look at look at advertisements and look at social media and you would imagine that everybody's happy and on vacation at parties all the time but what's life really like and so so getting to look at that getting to follow someone's life over. Eighty years is such a privilege so I thought this is like the most amazing work I could possibly do. So that's why I wanted to do it. And then some of the things we found were things that were expectable but really important messages to get out there. So for example we find that smoking is really bad for your health and your longevity Eddie and that that tobacco kills okay. We're just one more study to remind us of what we know. Alcoholism is a terrible terrible problem and so people who get into trouble with alcoholism really need help and support in getting treatment for that drug abuse as well Exercise regular exercise really does keep people healthier and allow them to live longer so again. These are not surprises. But to say that there's more and more science behind this is helpful for some people under percent yes and then the surprise for me and I think for many of us was the finding that people who aged better people who stayed healthier as they got older people who lived longer were people oh who had warmer closer relationships and people who were more socially connected to others that initially when we started it finding that in our data we didn't believe it 'cause we said well wait how Did like a bunch of social relationships. How could that make you live longer? What happened was that other studies? Other research groups began to find the same thing And that helped us believe it and now what we're studying is how does that happen. How could how could the warmth of your relationships? How could you relationship with your wife? Actually I make a difference. In whether you develop coronary artery disease or arthritis or diabetes. How could that possibly happen? We're learning about that now in our research. So that's the one of the cool things kept study now. Yeah absolutely and tell me about how you were able to deeply define social connection and what that won't Tom was. Because I think also that we can all project our own beliefs onto what that's Yemenis. But I'd love to hear your side of actually doing the research like what was categorized the garage this warmth and what was categorized as meaningful social connection to have that result. Yes okay so their bunch of different ways to think about social connection one is literally. How many people do you see in a given day or given week? And that's also important so people who see more people Tend to live longer and healthier Compared with people who are more socially isolated isolated right and is that. See One to one or do you mean even in the workplace even in the workplace de now sometimes they're they're called weak ties and what that means is people we are connected with but not that connected so I might see someone at work and we have a kind of friendly exchange. How was your weekend and it turns out that that's health promoting as long as they're decent exchanges as long as we're not snarling at each other right it turns out that that is health promoting okay okay but then in addition what you talked about the warmth of connection turns out to be really important? So we're not gonNA have the closest warmest connections with everybody. We see during the day but a few people. If we're lucky we'll be people who we feel like we could call on As we we asked our participants who could you call in the middle of the night if you were sick or scared if we have some people in our lives like that and then those are the connections that really help keep us healthy temps. So they're people who offer US physical support instant you what we call instrumental support. They'll drive us to the doctor when we need it. They'll come over and hold our hand. Were throwing up Emotional support so when I they have a a really awful day and I'm feeling terrible about my life and my work. I can talk to somebody and they will help. Calm me down and helped me put it in perspective and literally I can feel my body. Calmed down when that kind of conversation happens amazing and often often. It's your romantic antic partner. But you don't have to have a romantic partner to have this kind of relationship you can have close friends. It could be a sibling It could be a parent But having at least one or two of those relationships in the world is really important for our health and wellbeing and whether any indicates is that suggested how to build those or how these people were able to achieve that with people. Because I think today what we find is the struggle of like even being able to be expressive about our intentions with people or like. I have a very open way of behaving if I like someone I'll reach out them after reaching the ones we've met I'll be really clear about where I see. This going is a friend and I've literally said people that I'm very good friends with now that hey I think we are going to get along for life and I have this intention that we should be friends and sometimes it seems like the weirdest thing to say but now they thank me like a year later or two years two years later. They're like J. You said this to me and it's actually happening. I'm like because I thought that that's what it was and there will be people that I won't see again and so I'm just very clear about my intentions. That helps me a clarify to other people what I want. I can feel scary sometimes. What have you seen as good ways in which people can create those meaningful bonds? Because I think that's what we all struggle today I think today the challenges surrounded by people. But we still feel lonely. We're constantly having small talk but not deep talk constantly completely filled filled out with friends and followers but no one to call at that time. So what does it take to get that. Did you find anything around that. Yes so it takes some some degree of vulnerability meaning. I'm going to risk a little bit. And the risk is you might reject me or you. Might I turn away right so when you said to someone I think we get along really well and my intention is to be your friend the weirdest greatest thing in the friends because of it not weird at all but you made yourself vulnerable because what if someone turns into Naji. I don't think so so really. Nah I don't feel it so much. That would hurt a little so you but you're willing to put yourself out there now. Not Everybody is is going to feel comfortable doing that. Yes what I notice is it might be. Some guys are just used to playing basketball together or you know playing golf together or just watching watching a game on television together even asking another guy I to hang out could be making yourself vulnerable like you can feel like guys. Don't do that like if I don't happen to run into you or if our wives don't arrange it I'm not GonNa do it. So my level of vulnerability might just be saying to my friend. Would you get together with me on Saturday afternoon right. That's a big deal. Yes like I would love it if my intention I could say my intention is that we're going to be lifelong friends. Yeah and I think I'm I'm I'm trying to get more to that place But I think we each person has to start where they are and so I would say ah if I were to recommend it. Find out where you could be a little bit vulnerable with somebody and take that risk. Whatever that might be in trying to you may can keep a connection? Yes the other thing is i. We've found that relationships are like it's almost almost like physical fitness. Like you can't just say well we become friends so we're done Nash. Sure like like I went to the gym. So I'm done now. I don't have to go again ever no. I have to call you up and make sure that not too much time goes by before we talk before we get together to hang out right. I've I had to learn that in my own life and so I do it more with my friends because otherwise good relationships will just wither away. Yes and nobody means for that it to happen. So relationships require maintenance yes absolutely and one of the ways that I've done that practically for myself is I know in my mind that there are some people that I want to message every week. There's some people that I met at once a month and there are some people that I speak to every week and there are some people I speak to every month and just being able to create degrees in alive. Yeah of connection has really helped me because it allows me to understand that this is the level of relationship. I have with this person and we want that does is. It becomes more honest because I think we'd like to think that everyone in our life is either a best friend not a friend like we like to have this very clear black and white but life isn't like that there's so many more degrees of have gray and so many shades of grain so for me. It's far more practical to say. Look these are people that are my closest friends. The people I talk to every day the people I talked about everything but then there are people in my life that I love seeing once a month. Because they're the people I watch a movie with. Oh they're the people that I go out for dinner with and then there are people that I see once a year but there are amazing too because we go on this great holiday correct or whatever it may be ray and just knowing that you can have friends for different purposes in different roles in your life rather than trying to put everyone into one or two which becomes hard pressure for them and for yourself. Yes yes that's a really important point. The other thing is that people can move in and out of your life. It's not a problem if some relationships do fade away because sometimes we're only together because we got brought together by this other thing like we went to college together or something else happened and it's okay that relationships don't keep up as long as we keep up some of our relations but I think you're absolutely right that that we can also have different degrees of closeness and different degrees of involvement. And that there's everything right with that not that there's something wrong with that. Yeah Yeah Amazing and I wanted to move into this. You actually went on a three week. Silent retreat in that correct. Tell me about what prompted that when that was in and what you gained from that and why it all came about so i. I'm a Zen practitioner. I meditate every day. How long have you been doing that? And let's talk about actually. How did you become Zen practitioner? How did that become a big part of your life? I became Zen practitioner by accident. Thirteen eighteen years ago. My my son at that time was in middle. School and his friend was having a coming of age ceremony at a UNITARIAN church am I went and the I sat next to the mom of my son's friend and she knew I was interested in meditation. I dabbled a little. She pointed to the minister conducting the ceremony and said he's Zen master so I called him up and said cry. Come talk to you. And he was this wonderful all down to Earth teacher and he said come sit with our group so I started sitting regularly with a meditation group. Never done that before and and studying with this teacher and what I found was that once I sat regularly with a group and once I had a teacher I could meditate at home. Yeah whereas before I couldn't have a regular practice and then I started going to meditation Retreats Silent Retreats For a few days and then maybe a week and then I graduated to a three week silent retreat. That's the retreat. You're talking about and tell me about that retrea and what what you learned from N.. What you gain from those three weeks of silence Well I learned that my mind is a really difficult place laced to go into a loan. It's a really yeah like so much stuff comes up when you are watching your mind and the good thing thing was that I was with people who could help me understand what was happening. Lead helped me except the humanness of having a busy mind and a mind that made me crazy sometimes at a mind that made me anxious and you know and that that this work was of being on a silent retreat was learning about my humanness and all the ordinary stuff. That comes up in. Mind that that I came to accept more and more and gradually even welcome at like I would like chuckle and say. Oh yeah here it is again. You know this feeling of I'm worthless or this feeling of I've I've done everything wrong in my life or you know and then I could understand that these are feelings that come and go and they're very natural and that The more I accepted my own mind and and accepted myself the more at ease I became with everybody and everything in life so this three week work which was like one of the hardest things I ever done was undoubtedly one of the most valuable things I'd ever done. And what allowed you to push through that barrier. Because I remember the first time I ever did silent meditation when I became among one of the hardest. Things I believe is just getting pasta initial Baria. Yeah what you're hearing is noise and it's all consuming and you just like wow like. There is a lot of noise in my mind. This is going on and on and on and West is is GonNa stop and then usually that's what we give up. Yes because it's just so frustrating and overwhelming. Yes what allowed you to break through. And and how would you encourage other people to have that breakthrough it was through support through help from ideally teachers. And what was that support. The the support was well. Then the the tradition is in is to have small interviews like it might be a two minute or a five minute interview with teacher her. So you're sitting all day in silence but then when it's your turn you go in you see the teacher. You tell him or her. What's on your mind? And they really help you with it. They help you put it in perspective and and I could be in agony for several hours and then go in and talk to my teacher and she she would say to me. Oh yeah this is what your mind is doing and we know about this and pretty soon. It's going to pass and then I'd go out and I'd sit again by myself and it would pass and it and seeing at having someone guide you and say yes and this is what's likely to happen and this is normal was like the most relieving thing that could happen then. I began to be able to do that for myself. And that was the key like them mornings. I would wake up and say My life there's a mass then he could then have that perspective of okay. This happens and I'm not gonNA feel this way two hours from now. Yeah and and it's knowing that with other people's help that really is transformative. Absolutely I completely agree with you in among the same often said that I think when we first a start. Meditating it's important to have an immersive experience and be guided experience for Masters because I think the challenges that if we just trying to in our homes immediately. It's so hard to push through so I think it's amazing when we're using APPS and doing ten minutes a day and I think those all powerful things but I'd love to Bancard anyone who really wants to meditation a series practice in their life. Just like anything else when you go and do something for half a day a day a weekend or a week it becomes so much more natural because not only. Do you get the hyme to have the breakthrough us have the time to reap the benefits and therefore when you go back to your ten minutes a day twenty minutes a day or whatever it may be you have that conviction and confidence that this is actually worked before exactly exactly and and don't hesitate to search for a guide a teacher who you resonate with that you won't resonate with everybody and if you're lucky enough to have a few people in your local vicinity or even online that you could study with Find it's like a matchmaking. Find Somebody who who feels like you WANNA learn from them and trust them so you wrote an article about the four powers of quiet or how quiet can transform transform our lives and the first quiet you talk about. His quiet helps clarify. What's most important now and tomorrow? Could you share what you mean by that for us. Yes that that often. When I'm caught up in the business of my day I get distracted by so many things and I think that's really really important that I that I need to to handle these emails right now? Or and then if I stop and often this happens when I meditate each day The the swirl of emails receipts and what begins to emerge is something more from my heart which is oh. I need to call my son because I haven't talked to him in a while or I really don't want to be involved in that project because there's something about it that doesn't feel right to me and often. It's only when I'm quiet that my intuition can can talk to me right that my gut feelings of. That's probably not a place I want to be involved or I really need to spend more time. Here it's only during the quiet that my inner voice will start making those noises and talking. Yeah I love that I completely agree with you. It's it's so true because otherwise has the noise just completely overshadows everything else and you're so right about also listening to I immigration. I in tuition gets buried in the noise. And you on here in a voice in the noise and so one hundred percent where the second one was quiet allows space for contentment and joy. Yes so today I had been you know morning discussion that you were in and so many ideas swirling around in my head was spinning in my head was Kinda getting heavy and then I said I need to take a break and I went out and I said okay. I'm going to sit by the lake and simply watch in so I watched the water and I watch these birds playing in the reeds. And I watched an ant crawling up my I hand and and everything. Just kind of quieted down. In and I found myself listening to the birds and and then feel like Oh my God. The birds are so amazing. And that's often. What happens in a meditative silent meditation retreat where people will come into interviews and say did you know there are birds outside because suddenly they hear with a vividness? Something that just recedes into the background all the time. And that hearing the vividness the sudden vividness of a sound or or an or a site gives us joy. And so that's what that's what the the merges for me. I love the The Fed owners quiet reveals the emptiness of chasing off to the next big thing. Oh yes So I work at Harvard Medical School and needless to say Harvard Medical School places. A lot of importance on accomplishment and honors and titles and of course that inspires a lot of good work. I mean Harvard. Medical School is full of of wonderful people and bright people and caring people but this chasing honors and recognition and titles can the endless and what I find is that this quiet and this practice of returning to quiet makes me realize okay. I don't really really need that next title and if I got that next award I'd get a warm feeling about ten minutes and then it would be done And so what do I really want to invest my time in. Is it working for that award or is it working for something that I cared deeply about. That might not be as bright bright or shiny or well recognized. Amazing I love the fourth one. As quiet reminds us that we can be happy with less. Yes yes well. Because so for example. Today I went out and sat by the League. That didn't cost anything. It didn't require any special equipment and it was nothing it was me going and sitting down and so and and it's also simplicity. So what you realize you know we we are constantly told to buy things and to to Pay for new experiences and what you realize is that just sitting still and paying attention brings a kind of joy and happiness that requires no resources whatsoever. I love that yeah absolutely so true. There's so many times a day that a free activity could actually end up saving us. Yes not just money but saving leaving US internally yes and it's completely free cost nothing apart from time yes and a bit of presence yes and Energy and attention but but many people will say to me. Oh I can't sit still and meditate. I hear that all the time here at all the time right and I think it's because at first our minds a really busy an active and that's scary and so as you say it's pushing through it's allowing yourself enough time for things to quiet down. Yes well I don't know about you like I've I I've been. I've been meditating for two hours a day for the past thirteen years of my life. So it's been a huge part of my life and I find that even today because of myself living a very productive Dr lifestyle and traveling and social media and everything. It takes me even when I stopped meditating every morning it takes me around ten minutes to just I reach choir. Maybe even fifteen may twenty and so if we're only meditate for ten minutes and that's what we've only ever done. I'm not surprised that we only ever hear noise. Yes because if you've Alexa when I was in one dollars to two. Meditations is eight hours long and twelve hours long and that was really painful excruciating. I as you said but when you push through instead that's why I'm encouraging anyone listening watching his do that and I'm not telling you to do two hours. I'm just telling you to go to claw so go find a teacher. Whatever and do do half an hour with someone like going dive that step further? Where you can have that breakthrough through and it's almost like the gym too? It's like the day you go. The first day you go to the gym is not the day you walk out with the six pack call woke up with any of that. It's also not the day that you fall in love and all the machines jeans make sense to you and you know what to do. It takes time in practice and meditation is no different. It's just a habit that takes a breakthrough and and I think we have to be patient with it. It to to have that breakthrough exactly and to have the experiences which we do have some times of really feeling better of feeling more settled of feeling more joy That we have to get to a point where we have those experiences to know that they're available to us and that they will happen. That's it that's exactly it. Yeah and that requires a bit of break through so I'm encouraging everyone who's listening watching to just take that step through to recognize that. Even after meditating for a long amount of time not just myself everyone that I know it still takes time to quiet in the mine and when you're in that meditation so don't Judge Judge yourself don't be hard on yourself. Don't be harsh on yourself. It's not that you have a messed up. Mind or any of that. It's it's just that we do live very busy. Hectic scheduled lives the other thing we might encourage your listeners. To think about is noticing those places not where. They're formerly sitting meditating but those places where they're just so absorbed in their life that they don't even think think about it time just passes yes it could be that you are Sometimes like I have a friend who's a carpenter and he finds that sometimes sometimes when hes woodworking. He's just in zone. Some people are skiing down a slope and they don't think about anything they're just in it and and so you may a find at my wife plays the piano and she says the piano is her meditation because when she is practicing the piano. She's just lost finished. She doesn't think about anything else. She's just in the zone and so I would suggest to people that they might see whether there are places in their lives. It could be gardening. It could be anything. See if there are places that are like that for you points of time and whether you could enjoy those four what they are which is a kind of meditative agitative practice in itself and do the more often and do them more often so I I wanted to speak about this. Because I've heard you say before you speak about secure attachment Richmond and I really was fascinated by those two words and I wanted to really understand what secure attachment is and be. How how do we practice? Yes so attachment is the the fact. Act that as human beings we need other human beings from the time were born in fact as we know we can't survive as infants unless we are connected with at least one other person who will give us care and and just surround us with care when we're young on in fact what we know. Is that children in orphanages. Die If they are not given love at not just that you can have all your material. Oh needs met. You can be fed and changed but you will die if you're not given some kind of love you have to be able to attach to another being and we used to think that this was simply something that children needed infants. Then we realized that it goes all the way through the life cycle. It just takes a slightly different form so at a secure attachment in adulthood is a relationship. Where you feel that somebody really has your back that they will provide a safety net for you? As I said before that they're the person you could call in the middle of the night. If you're scared or sick that to feel like there's if somebody in the world who will be there for you and you can you can have more than one person and you can replace attachment figures with a new people over time and we do so initially their parents but then it can be friends can be lovers it can be children. Grown Children But to have people like that in your life is is a secure attachment and part of secure attachment is feeling like that person. Dan will support you in taking risks so as an adult if I wanna try something new so for example I'm I'm now taking singing lessons no way that I used to think i. I never thought I could sing. But there's this great singing teacher in our community entity and so I thought okay like do I dare 'cause i. I never thought I could sing at all so my wife said do it. Come on what. What do you have to lose? She supported me in trying something new when if she had said. Oh you're you can't carry a tune don't do it. I would have shrunk back and said no now so that support in venturing out into the world is what an attachment figure a secure attachment relationship can do for us. Yeah that's it's beautiful. Yeah and I love. I love how that applies so much compared so well with what you said about children that when children we also need a secure attachment take risks exact so when we first walking you have your mother your father help you walk when you I ride a bike you have someone who's running behind you pushing in your long and we need as young as we're kids. We need secure attachments to take risks. And I think we forget that is regrowed. Exactly in in fact. If you're if you're ever in a park with a mother or a dad and a toddler you can see this happen. A toddler will tentatively start walking walking away from the parent and then start playing and then something will happen. Maybe a bird will tweet or some sound will frighten the child and they'll run back to the parent grabbed their leg. Spend a little time there and then venture out again. And that's what we do as adults at you know we seek comfort and then we can venture back out into the world and take risks and I love that point specifically. I think it's true that we all need secure attachment but like the point that when we had that secure attachment we can actually really break forward. And what about those of us. Who sometimes feel like? I don't know how you feel. I'm just reflect on some moments in my life. Some of the biggest moments in my life life which will high risk or high transitions. I actually didn't have a secure attachment for the decision so I had to secure attachment and the fact that my mom and dad always loved me but they didn't necessarily always not that they disagreed but they didn't always promote my decisions and so in that I had to take my own S- be my own secure attachment to really push forward. If I never did never become a monk. If I never did that I I would never have left being a monk and if I never did that alone I would never have switched in transition into doing what I do as my purpose today because when I had that secure attachment and my my parents were so worried for my health and safety or longevity with their parental image was correct but like when I I told my mom I was going going to move away from my successful corporate job to try and teach what I share what I was doing on social media. My mother just looked at me like are you serious. It's like why do you need to do that. And so why do you need to take a risk and so many people around me always had that and I've always found that some of the best decisions in my life. I had to take a loan. Yes news helped me understand that a bit more from you. That's a good. That's a good question so I think what happens is we can internalize we can take in that function that close people parents can provide for it so your parents probably allowed allowed you to fail at some things and helped you with the failure so you came home and you didn't do well in a soccer match or you know. Do something else happened or you didn't do well on an exam and your parents helped you see that it wasn't the end of the world right and that you could get you know. Pick yourself self up and go back out there that experience and being helped through that experience probably over and over again allows you then to to do it for yourself right. And that's what you're seeing so that then you can have the courage to check in on your own internal compass so you know no surprise that your mother wasn't saying sure. Go leave your job. So we're sure go off and be among yes dear no you know. Oh that's and so. How do you do that? You're asking how do you do that for yourself. And I think it's probably because somewhere along the way people helped you internalized allies that function of being able to allow yourself to take the risk. Allow yourself to anticipate I could fail at this and I. We'll be okay. I will take care of myself and other people will take care of me if you yes yes being able to. It's the taking the risk and being able to fail. That allows you to take risks. Yeah no I think that's beautiful and I think you're spot on because I remember that when I perform badly at school or when I'd have some sort of challenge in a grade or a clause to a sport my parents would highlight it on that day or on that evening so when my parents who come back from a parent teacher conference whatever it was that was always the most nerve wracking thing in the world just waiting for your parents to come back and you get what your teachers guy I just and I already knew what my teachers are going to say. Because I naturally excelled in some things and didn't in others and I was always excelling the things my parents didn't care about and and I didn't an excel at things. My parents did care about and so when they got back I knew that I would have to hear it that day. Then the next day they were back to being normal yes. And that's kind kind of I've. This is the first time I'm reflecting on that but I found that worked for me because it helped me reflect enough to know I wanted to improve and grow uh-huh but it helped me not judge myself the next day so that I could start afresh again. Yes and I think some of the biggest challenges we have is we keep judging ourselves. Based on one event a one grade one moment daily almost extend our judgment based on one day one failure and we keep applying that judgment to ourselves of forever. Yes and I think relieving ourselves of that judgment on a daily basis have you in becoming m priest and etc review for by Judgmental Taller. How works for yourself and others? I'm sure about judgment so much. So what we we talk about in meditation in Zen is the the judging mind the mind of right and wrong we call it and how easy it is to slip in to the mind of right and wrong. I'm right about this. I'm wrong about that or or you're right about at this or your wrong about that. And that that meditation helps us to have a bigger perspective. Where right and wrong or often it kinda relative and kind of not that important that of course there are some things that are terribly important? You know about moral moral codes and and moral Oh compass of course but then often the right and wrong like well. You didn't do so well at math But in the grand scheme of things you know we look beyond these these these judgments and see beyond the judging mind to the bigger world where you know we look at that tree the and we don't say oh. I wish that tree had branches. That were a little more like this or that tree is not believe. I don't like the design of those leaves so well we never ever do that right because we because major is beyond the mind of right and wrong nature is beyond this judging and so in Zan part of the teaching in is can we get beyond this judging of ourselves and others that we just come forward in the world as we are and that's fine that's like that treaty it coming forward as it is. What are the core principles of zen that have really captivated you and other lessons like that? I love that point. You just made around nature chair being beyond the judgment of the mind what else. What are the other themes that have really stood out to you as Coppola Xavier practicing journey one of the core pillars pillars is to understand how completely interconnected I am with everything in the world? Everything so that I am not going out to be in nature. I am completely part of nature in every moment. Yeah and that we you when I are sharing the same air we are not separate in so many ways and so again. That idea then becomes Tom. If if I win you lose I lose. You know if we if we don't all rise together Nothing can work so so. This interconnectedness has become something that I know more in my bones. Yes that I used to pay lip service to the intellectually but now and I think meditation really helps get that. Yeah away that I couldn't quite get before I love. The one thing you spoke for me there is with that interconnectedness. I had this reflection of. I think it was a couple years ago but it was in my study of the Bug Guitar and I was reflecting on a lot of these statements that we hear today of manifestation attraction the universe responding and I was whenever I hear statements being thrown around or becoming popular in culture. I I really trying to reflect on. Where's that come from? Where's the root of that statement thing? Where where's the truth in that? It's just like you would check in a study. It's like it's like checking to study but I always want to check in the buggy tune. These Texans see like where does that come from. Is it real. Or is it something someone's manufactured and one thing that I came across which I'd love to share with you because I think it applies to what you're saying in a love to hear your perspective on it is I found that if you observe nature carefully which you've so beautifully said that we are of and we are nature. It's not that I'm going into nature. We are nature if we look at it and observe nature carefully. Nature is always always serving so the sun is always providing heat and light trees always providing oxygen and shade. The trees always providing fruits flowers flowers. That are beautifully scented. The water is always providing water to drink anything in nature. It's only serving and so therefore the only the only way to align with nature to be one with nature and to be nature is to serve and actually all of our problems come from not serving Because we're unaligned from nature so when we talk about the universe responding to us the universe responds only when you're lined with it and the only way to be in line to the universe is to serve love because that's what the universe does right. Does that make sense. Yes it makes total sense and that the not serving because I can be as selfish as the next person sneaks right. Yeah absolutely and the impulse not to serve is comes in me from a place of scarcity like there's not going to be enough right and what you're describing is is that nature is is way more than enough that there is this kind of fullness about the world and that we are part of that fullness and when we know Oh that then we are free to serve. Then it's not about. Am I gonNA get enough of what I need. It's that I already have much more than I could ever need. Yes yeah absolutely. And and you've sparked when when we used to talk about the spiritual west of the material realm. We were talking about how the material realm were used to things being finite tonight when you're going to a theater or cinema. There's a finite number of seats if you're into sports game. There's a finite number of seats if you're looking to apply for a job. There's a finite number of jobs. It's always always limited free. Thirty applicants thousand applicants twenty-five applicants sixty thousand tickets available for the World Cup. Whatever may be and we always talk about how you know in the theater of happiness is an unlimited amount of seeds Like there is no limit on the amount of seats in the theater. Happiness at the theater of wellbeing. Yes because that's not reserved for a specific type of person. I love that image. Yeah the other thing I would say to riff on a little I want to. That's is that maybe in the theater of happiness there's a particular seat that's yours. Yes agreed agreed. One hundred percent that absolutely you know if we think about aligning with the universe. I don't align with the universe by becoming like you correct your like anybody else. I aligned with the universe by finding where I fit hung Amazon. and where and seeing feeling my way through life in the world right absolutely and there's a quote from Joseph Cambell that I absolutely love Love Jessica more. He's you bet you've used but the quote is if the path before you is clear you're probably on somebody else's it's this idea that we we find our seat in the theater happiness right. We find our seat in the theater of service right so I'm not going to serve in the same way you're you're And and so my job is not to become as much like you as I can. Although that would be great I actually not at all no. I'm with yeah I think yeah I I. There are many qualities I admire but I think it's often that and that's probably important so when we look at other people we admire we look at a you know a facebook page. Hey just say I want that life that actually. That's not what we want. We Really WanNa find where our energy leads us where we align in the universe. An Kazan has really taught me that. Yeah I love that and I and I agree that actually when when inspired by others qualities and we see the qualities that allow them to access. It's an opening grow whatever it is those qualities things that we can be imbibing as opposed to the once. Yeah and I find that. That's where we always end up. Is We observe. Observe People's External Janney their internal journey whereas the internal journey is actually similar is the External Jenny. That's different of the internal journey of if south exploration requires a lot of the similar things. We'll all go through breakthroughs and breakdowns and but the external Janney doesn't need to be the same in tool no and it. It shouldn't be either and it. It doesn't really happen ever I we also and I was. I was staying that yesterday and I remember US connecting when I was sharing it was the the statement in the GITA. That says it's better to practice your own path even if imperfectly than to practice the path of another's perfectly. Yes and often. So much of our life is lost in trying to practice. It is someone else's path right. Joseph Campo who said perfectly like what was trying to perfect right someone else's journey and that's why we climbed that ladder and get to the top. Open go wait. This is not the tower I wanted to be on the top of this. Isn't the wall that meant decline and what we forget is that the internal journey is so similar similar right that we look at external journeys and say well. That's different from mine or I should be more like that. But the internal journey is so similar for almost all of us. And the you. There's another saying I like that that we're always comparing our insides to other people's outside. Yes right that you know because other people people are putting on their game face and we do we have to do that for each other in the world but really it's our inner experience that so a similar and that when we can share those are the moments that are magical between people amazing. I love that so in very anti anti zen fashion. We're going to end with what I call a quickfire rapid fire round so we do these final five questions on every episode and the final five questions to be answered in one word. Read one sentence maximum. So I'm pretty sure you're going to be absolutely finding this better. Like I said we are probably get lost in it. Because I'll probably love Buron says in Alaska more but the first one is you've said that giving off full attention to things is one of the hardest things to do what something you always give you a full attention attention to my patients when I'm doing psychotherapy with somebody. My job is to be fully present and and and so I am I do nothing else. I there's nothing else. It's just the two of us so in fact. I'm probably earliest fully present with you as I ever am. Because we've cleared out most distractions so so I guess it would be that. Did I give my full attention when I set up the conditions to be right for doing that Like like you've done here or like Ed my patients or when I'm lucky and I remember like I do with my wife when she wants to tell me about her day. It's something that I have to engineer. And then I can be fully present. Amazing fantastic question to you've been with your wife for over thirty years. Is that right. What's your favorite or best relationship advice? You can give to me my audience. Remember that the relationship is going to change and that's okay That each person is going to grow and develop and that. That's not a problem. So that things are going to wax and wane that you know some of the physical passion just isn't going to be there all the time some of the Emotional excitement of being together isn't going to be there all the time and that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the relationship it means that the relationship is a living vibrant something. You love the question number three. If you have everyone in the world do an experiment for thirty days and they would be doing one activity every day for thirty days. What would it be? It would be to meditate every day for thirty days. Okay no come lazy okay question before. What's the first thing you do when you wake up? Above from brushing teeth. Showering or any of that normal. I Meditate Yep Pathak. And you've been doing that for now. Thirteen years yeah amazing and the fifth and final question. What is one trait that you think you have? That is allowed you to create the life that you have today. What is one quality or trey or characteristic that you have you think has been integral in in providing happiness and well-being your life but you seem like a very happy and I I think it's a willingness to say I don't know and to try try new things and learn from people and to say? Please teach me because I don't know what I'm doing here that I think that's that's that's that's the thing that I would hold onto of all the things that that of all the qualities I have. That's the thing I would hold onto because because it's because it's it's allowed me again to all these new things that I ever dreamed I would be doing Absolutely thank you again row for doing this. Thank you for the pleasure for being here I. It was on the Green Conference. Hope you enjoyed it. Yeah really I got totally lost where I wanted to get. Oh I'm sorry. Did we go good way. No no no good way I I always want and a good podcast interview for me is when we go beyond the page. Yeah and so my questions give me structure and points to push on. But then after that I want those points to lead to deeper things and that's what they did. Yeah I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation on a personal and I'm excited for everyone to hear for everyone. New hasn't seen talk building. His Ted talk get pleased with go. Check it out it's awesome. It's far less time than this. So you probably learn different things from it and it will really give you understanding of the study as well which has been so well documented in talked my in so many areas now but if you want to go to the source of that study that Ted talk is the one to watch it already. Been viewed over like twenty seven million times or something crazy like that so please please please check that out doctoral bewildering is there any other way that my audience can follow you. See Your work or oh read your articles and stay connected yes They can go to our study website which is called adult development development studied dot org and they can go to our foundation website which is lifespan. Research Dot Org and and I just want to say one more thing. which is that? I think you and I get along really well I I do definitely thank you. I made side for many more more conversations online and offline where we can really dive deep into a few things. I'm excited but thank you so much yeah.

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Sue Perkins | Season 4

Homo Sapiens

56:18 min | 7 months ago

Sue Perkins | Season 4

"Hello for body Chris. Hey just a reminder that this episode was recorded pre lockdown back when we could be in a room together and second reminder that this season episodes are coming weekly. So today we've got an interview absurd neck says day we will have her sapiens extra lockdown extended edition. Enjoy. Listening. We're really excited because we've sue perkins on the she's here she's queer get used to it. It's a very exciting and lovely charts and it was so funny I for absolutely centuries like seriously since they last saw her she's become like. The Queen Mum? Yes. She has a of Britain. In a way and Stephen Fry was equipment for awhile, I think Susan been it for a bit now if anyone who goes near bake off. You just suddenly become royal state because I was a bit confused because I'm a bit by in the loop on British culture she used to present because and then when it was sold to channel four or something, she didn't go with live. Fedex not. All the time. Well I can't remember if we asked to it should be should we kind of grazed but I felt I didn't being the bruised it the way you would bruiser. Kick with job. All, these programs basically, just survivor survivor was the first one, and now there's there's drag queens fiber. There's. Model survivor does cooking survive. Another survivor will I was interested actually the to saying they tried to make it more hijinks when it started her and Mel pushed bag and she tells the. Drama, wish we're not going to do. We're not going to try and get in these people's heads to make them think it's all. Yeah, we're on the precipice of disaster. This is a nice warm cod liver show. People making kicks. Yeah and I think that I wonder if. The past ten years. We've got this kind of British thing which is like spillers around always centered around like a dead woman or. A kid and. I feel like it may be irresponsible it's just won't have vegan kicks. I. Reckon they do. Yes. That's good. Will Not that. This is a this is gay people. In this country and also you know look like. Maybe I'll give it. What the presenting? No. That's not the selection Bertha's you know this wasn't your interview. I anyway but. I think's interesting about sue what many things how? Prolific she is. Also A. Her openness having sort of a midlife crisis in this to be very interesting and talks about her rely ending a relationship when she was forty and we talk about are kind of you know things about gang older. Of course, you want you can't take part in that part of the conversation because. Nubile youth rushing but Yeah, I think it's it's an interesting one about. Being a woman of a certain age and. I think it's you know she's so successful all these things for her and yet she's being able to be open to buy. Stuff that everybody goes through it yeah. She's very open about her messy times. She's not in control and it's none of us are. Messy lives are messed. Life is a movie actor. Oscar Wilde said. After. Some. Questions I think sir. Segui onto that how about this from a woman? Bast friends just became a whole lot more. Any Advice Exciting? We didn't do the jingle. Can Leeann Agony uncle Fling. Woman best friends just became a whole lot more and advice. What do you think if you ever had? was. Has a friend over turned into me and my all my best friend WHO's probably listening because she listens when we were younger. We try and get it onto the pretend that we were. We were. Let's be boyfriend and girlfriend and we snuck loads, but I wasn't cutting the mustard fool me. Or her in fact I think we're just young and experimenting, right? But. Ledesma, trans. Have you Over the years and has to Mamba. Well. Are I. Mean I'm friends with people I've had sex within the past. Maybe that's more dude. Not, like I have a friend and then is not a guy fans now and like all of us you know were shocking. No I mean like I've had sex people maybe it'd be my then. What sex, and then this is my friend. Yes. I look people like most of the people I know do you Next time I for dinner a whole new. View Them I never turned into I've never had friends turn into it a accept, and so how do you imagine that would? I mean in one way I I always think well great because at least you know you like each other you know that you you get on bio things interesting. What you're saying it's like that doesn't mean the end of the friendship maybe okay. Back to being just friends. My Dad was friends with all his ex girlfriends like my godmother is one of my dad's ex-girlfriends. That's nice. Yeah. I think it makes sense if you've had an intimacy with people our friendship and not win and and also I have to say I really. Like that. I think sex intimacy in that kind of way is something that. It's lovely. Deserve a hub that part of your friendship yeah. Mean it's not something. Sordid or embarrassing awkward for me. It's something like, yeah we had a really beautiful really beautiful. And that something as an added sort of part of the richness of your French. Yeah and also like I've always felt whenever I have entered into a romantic thing with someone, it's not really within my control attraction is attraction and it comes out. So if it's happening, let it happen and. I think we were saying to this. Lovely Lady. As Gopher it. Given. What can you do I mean because actually you're perilous? Yeah and pose. Did but I bet I see good things. Also, if you know the person video, well, then you know what they're going to be like perhaps you might know their flaws you might not there might know that anxieties you've got a heads up on everything I actually think it's really good. I think more people should do this. Yes, and then have Kasana volume. Back. We need to get to a place where that becomes a t shirt. I want to I think this is a great one. Okay. Good head it's about. It's about more than the question. I. Think it says how to start acting in your mid twenties with no previous experience. Now, I think the reason I think this is a fascinating question is I think a lot of people think you can't change things in your life after twenty-three because we will want to success everything now is and I think if you haven't, if you want to do something no matter what age you got to do. I mean I think I always say that people like do you want to Have a life that is defined by what. Do you. Do you want to just have a go at and if you don't, and if it doesn't go the way, you want someone else but don't don't do a what or I only wish I. Don't life's too short fucking, and also you know when I was seventeen, I went to drama school a man who was the year above me in second year. Was Forty six years old. He's my dear friend called Ralph and he went he was an upholsterer and everything. Them. and. then. He went to drama school and. You know reinvented himself and became an actor. Professional actor and I I just I think that was an awesome. died at drama school. 'cause you if you. If you missed a class like in in the mornings of you, Mr Movement classes I mean he would go you'd be in the public a go. Someone say over wants to talk to you. Oh, he's over Allen coming the pint of lager Alan Coming I. Had you slept in for your movement class do you know how many people would like this place at drama school and you wasting at? Don't you don't you dare Angeles? I'll be on time. So he kept us all in line and. Ralph is a role model because he completely changed everything in his life and I think that it's never too late I. Feel. I'm going to change my life in late next year I'm going to become a dancer. and. Dance piece suit of similar thing you can do it. And I think you have to I. Think we all kind of forget the like these things are very frightening and very hard work and that's okay. That doesn't mean you made the wrong decision. It just means that's what it takes. So. Yes. So so please stop acting you're in your mid twenty S. All we ask for is when you get your first Tony, you thank us in this. You. Know what it says start acting immature with no previous experience like half of Hollywood does experience. Yeah Yeah. So explain getting married. President United. States has no fucking experience and because he's doing so. Just. Need the experience buyers not something to be. Intimidated by right that was. More one more. I. Think you'll very. Very, well placed to deal with that. What's his it? How do you deal with an angry person? I would say. From experience this the first of all have to realize that you cannot fix them. Make them not angry. Let me grab a pen. That's the biggest. That's the biggest thing I have taken away from. Decades of therapy and from having. A An angry parent. and. Had some angry partners, which is, of course, something happens when you haven't quite got yourself to try to you seek the familiar in your lover's to something that was sort of a difficult for you and your child did. So I think the biggest thing is to realize it's you can't fix them. You can only hope that guide them towards them wanting to fix themselves. Yes. Very true and I think. The. What about in the moment like if someone's. Going nuts oh well, you know it's funny. Grant my husband. Teaches at the school and they go to. Class on how to deal with could speak. And he said that the great thing yeah, he's. He's used it and I've used to it's six someone speaking out. Like I think used in on the subway when someone was Lebanon. Screaming and Furious. And I've I've used it with with in the similar situation someone's going mental and fears with something he just to them. What do you need right now Engages them and mix and match think well, what do I need and just that just for a little second and then getting them to engage with you. Make it better. So that that's that's. Excellent. Advice and it is mixed. so much sense takes the someone is just has lost it. Ask Him what the actually need of what the actually want is such a good thing for them to disconcert whereas sort of stop diffuse it immediately, what do you think that? I think I would like to pick up some chicken bones. And gave them to all the angry people in the world. s lovely. Thanks so much agony. We WanNA say a massive. Thank you to them to writing. Yes. Is Shedding your agony and please keep thinking of us. Now Lives in gentlemen the lovely and talented and Fragrant Perkins. Yeah, I found it. Curious Liberation wants at cross the threshold of fifty. Yeah. I do lender September became fifty and the for the six months before I was almost entirely bearable. The. Classic. Lowest. Grade entry level sorts of Midlife, crisis. I wanted to be somebody who just didn't behave the way everyone else behaves I wanted to sort of I'm gonNA run contrary to the narrative. No, I just suckered straight into that. Four what am I about? A year and then I had a party got hammered. Couldn't give a shit. See like businesses use. Every. As, bad as It was the permission of and I don't know Khatri maybe of hard wired to reflect these big thinks birthdays Zito on the end are by their very nature contemplative. Probing. Should make a good thing to do that every now. Did you pro fifty. We built. been. Great. Probe is often I can. It's a what you thing is that brings you to a crisis had never I. Didn't think normally I'd have one I think is exactly the sort of cultural the cultural pressures subconscious cultural precious to examine on both end. Yeah I agree and like sheep wool lemmings or whatever the appropriate animal would be. We just follow. You know however counter cultural I wished to be an exciting and off the beaten track. nope. Just plum fell into who did you do it for it to? Another one another one of those cry I remember as I detonated my life at forty ought to have a big relationship rather stupidly, and then just remember wondering family drunk on the heath at about five in the morning encountering a Hedgehog and cradling like have cable and really the state. Yeah. Just who's just? Well I thought you. Hills. Cradle. Interesting. Story. Thirty. Yes. Open sort of seismic. What was feeling should even if even if big things aren't naturally evolving I, feel I should something's as Mick ship besides. and. Did regret leaving when you're? Leading. In that manner, I think certainly just the often things end, but you can manage a better ending than the. Fico Walkway Yeah I just think so. Badly. Basically badly I wasn't there wasn't sort of. No not like that just just sort of slightly cavalier with another person's heart. I needed to go and do you know be somebody else do some other things and? Still friends we but that's good then. I'm pretty much friends with to be friends with much. What's the point? All your eggs? Yeah. I like to be I. Have Several I'm very offended with first couple. What is your? What is your are you from a religious background? As brought up a Catholic I i. knew it. I knew it. Yes. It's no great surprise So The first time I kissed boy anyone in fact I was at about seven and it was under an enormous statue of the Virgin Mary Home My. God Now if I saw this game, we'll probably wouldn't be here. In. The. System Dorothy was less than pleased and everything was hugely just offer that happened somebody. Cracks, the head opinion when your scores one, they would always say if crop had opened it just basically fallen. Image that I don't miss thing and then somebody somewhat fallen and that. I imagine the head splitting like. Earthquake. Situation in this huge because it's only with some terrible scintillating admitted failure both note because Roy, not the genesis of gayness. But. This is the perfect Catholic store. This is exactly how you feel. So. Yeah. I was some very early doors educated by. Manny proper old nuns, poor nuns and windows and everything, and then my dad at been brought by A. Been Educator Monks and came home one day and I was holding my hand he said what's up At least my hand because I'm left handed. My Dad went in and how to word 'cause my dad's was so nolde my he'd been absolutely hammered but not he was right handed but anytime You take the side of the ruler and absolutely go on his knuckles. As brutalized and I think. That was the wake up call of what Misra my. I my to another school. So shortly after that, but my early genesis was in that sort of. Token of. Ketosis. I have a confession. When many many years ago I came on your late night show. I said that. My friend Sues Kat had died. and. You're very nice and she hadn't said jokes anyway fence you laugh. To think about. Bruce Penance, do we have wants me? Simple question at this point would be. The longer that it's taken if he confessed the sin, does the penance or comment over time? That to me a week. Later, I'm giving you a hail Mary but now I was Hong. I. Would soupy. You're going to be. Could be absolutely hammering that rosary saying. See. I was nice at least it was nice as I said. Don't look bad. No. Eating the thing you know we've been with me, remember what it was and and chatting you know obviously. We had this joke my friends, my friend Andrew and I we have the jokes when she was. A cat called Khloe who died but like twenty years before I mean like when she was a teenage. It. was like she was really upset with this is a joke androids who the Nike came along I. We picked I picked up and we always. Said I did you. Disclosed I sorry and. So. I knew watching. Was it live? So, unusual watching and I said I said, oh can I just thanks very much me I. Can I just say my friend, her clay died today so and you also hope you feel better roadblock. Without your big. Break He. S, I guess. So and we'd had some little breaks before you standard. So you a stand up comedian cooked dual. Yeah. We did maybe when we started, we have no. So I met Malick College, she was doing languages and would sporadically disappeared to Bologna to do some very intense. Workshops in Italian. Then, when we both graduated we We couldn't really get any work because. Everything. I. Knew about was Renaissance Literature and anything she knew about was some really weird sort of old world Italian chits. So with all, we'll just do some sketch comedy and we left it relate to do and Brazil we ended up. Getting ten AM SLOT IN A. Menu. And one person came to see it who rucksack off the entire. Angle measurements just looking at. Doing this sort of. And in the middle of. More modern opened it up to really large map of Edinburgh I. Think she was in the wrong venue folded up and then just went so. So we did that forbid and then so we've got a bit of traction here and then we still Sicily voice. So we made a sort of at a bit of a living doing. voiceovers remember there was one very strange. What I did was the beginning of video games, early wars and they asked me to play Russian. She's Russian sort of leather clad and I had to just do a series of noises of her kicking or being kicked out of context. Sounded perfect. Under role. Listener Tekken kind of noises amid lingering ones that would just basically says of. Porn and. We got. Some big break. Oh. Of course. Yes. But. French. And Saunders will really pivotal for us. They worried. For them. So. They just saw some trump that we've done on on the on the telly and it was a character piece may light some of our characters and they'd seen us in. Images didn't find his over one dance at your right for us and we know grow ten o'clock slot. No we graduated to search mid-afternoon who will be writing never take off. Game Plan in any way would you do feels good right now because between you and me? Up and say this to the next. Thing is. Really sort of again it's almost stopped being of of anyone looks at me twice if anyone else you know I kind of stuff comes in and then you think I think I was so grateful for a long time I do everything I need you to some pretty dark spaces. And some creative cul de sacs and then the older of course. I've said, the power of no has been very profound. Adachi don't want to do that I don't want to spend more time. But equally saying, yes to things that perhaps would. Would have been very. A easy passes in my is traveling namic traveled. Around the world and see Radio Weird stuff painful staff and she wouldn't have been ready to do that even ten years ago I think. It's going get on a plane you therapy. Yeah. Have you for a long time? Yeah without break but I mean considered almost consistently for. Eight years. I wouldn't be surprised if it's something that I do the rest of my life or. I mean I was working there and I find that really. I that I think that'd be good to the gym for your mind. Everyone. And why would therapy stop when I care that evolving so? When do you stop you stop yearning for think that's what a gaping case psyche like. Question questing. Hours. Off Me about it wants to stage a lot of stuff improvise I like it. They were saying, what did he the gay identity? Is I said that really know you Spectrum than we were talking about such thing really. But sometimes for me, it's like. You simultaneously want to be the RAB to fly. That's outside is just free and attling curious on undefinable. But then you also want to be inside with everybody and he also at the moment I feel accepted and very culturally insert sort of it's culturally normal I want to be transgress part me wants to be naughty them and transgressive, and then the moment transgress movement will let's face it. You know homophobe is on the rise the moment that starts to kick up again, you want to be inside new come on one love guys we're all the same and I I did that's just me or if that is Paul of more universal sort of sensitive. I mean. Let's do you guys feel that but I do my because today I went back to where I grew up in enough but Southfield And I went. And still in the headdresses is the photo of this old school headdresses is this photo this guy who was literally part of my sexual awakening is that has been listening to the word like this guy took photos. Thing now. Radio. You have to put on a website. You can see is tweeted. Let's see. Let's. See extremely that he's frozen in time and yes. So but I was there and I was like What it is I feel like the version of what your saying that I can really relate to like. I didn't want those people to welcoming because they never welcomed me in I. think that's why I feel when you're saying that I want to be part of this but actually them when they make it part of it so I don't want to be with you. You never let me in before I'm going to go over there. So I felt like I ping pong back and forth. Supposedly maybe to identity politics very early. On. I didn't experience phobia. You know what I mean my family were very liberal, but it was just unspoken stuff. Isn't that we you just sort of carry even though you have no experience I didn't have any experts homophobia I managed to carry around a very deep shape. What does that come from? Church. But my parents are so sweet and open minded and receptive and anything you want to be great. So it didn't come from but yet we maybe just two sets of for centuries of yeah. Shit Eve. It is a, it is a bit. I, did have my first serve. Homophobic insult in twenty years recently and I wonder if that's What happened to this is on the heath that guy was just. A think he said, you fucking. I just in in my in the phrase. Kelly you. Something bad happens in the the Boston the way you think about it bring things he should have said, yes I had that very profoundly. So at the time I just went I sort of went right up to and said. What did you say? And he sort of. Positive, almost, if you were GonNa hit me up some almost like an intimation of physical and I just thought, I'm going to stand here and was just stunned. I said what did you say re calmly by remember my hundred out so I just want to keep distance you come within the span of my the length of my arm I know that something already going but. And he just sort of buckled up and he said well I mean you've got a nice face. Why would you? What's my face got to do with? Why would you were? Trying to he was. and. So. On and I just said you. Unjust booking dog I'm quiet on I'm. In a good mood and I got love for everyone here and you've destroyed that and you can't take back today and I went off and I. Bust. It's a not. Because it was so shocking and so unusual I'm so blessed I never block people onto it to everyone is kind and courteous and I absolutely. Take everybody on board who they want to be and who they. Profess that they are and just had come off as I say it'd been. hacks on hops it. He then it was sort of loitering by the jets lose. There was like he looked like this little cloudy react to like glasses on like. Worst part of me wanted to send going to judge anybody what they're doing. They are dirty, but I just didn't want to get I didn't want to replace. knee-jerk unkindness with knee jerk on would have been portrayed off for me to to make but. It's just interested me afterwards and are so Dettori in upset to. Maybe it wasn't the first one. Yeah. But it I think before it was all. Under the radar. Has Ever. Actually said that to me. That's what I thought. It Tomah thought Oh that's back again. But no that was the first time ever when I was growing up mutterings and That it was all quiet quiet a cultural thing that's just not quite right now who? Takes back, kind of harsh Mr puncture the bubble it was really but I I actually then just outside because. I was sort of able to kind of deal with me on from its and there're some people you want as fortunate as I am to be able to pay for therapy to tap to be able to live in a nice part of town where you can walk it off with a loving dog. Yes and I just felt shit about. But it doesn't undermine what happened as well. But grade these book out to him because. Yeah. In that moment to well, it's interesting what you do when I felt very threatened by him but it was more of a homophobia side it was more of an indicator of what I would do. Yet an aggressive situation after to recalibrate not I, don't want to necessarily walks. Angry people. Find. A couple of situations I thought. What did you do? There you run walked I, walk straight into. G, didn't that's pent-up rage in Turn your this things that you're angry about your I'm going to stand down. I think it's also I think I can fix people who'd angry. Yes my thing. I think I can my father I felt like I. I I'm a couple of the relationships I've had in my late I. Realize her people that I. Felt familiar with in loved and I'm angry and I thought I could fix them. I can make them happy. You have any success no. With. Those people. and. But I is I recognized the pattern stop doing. Well. The iced up with people I was. Living with. I just I occasionally now I realize with friends and things like, Oh, I, see I've got to back away from this I'm not. Situations like that or they're very hard way from and their situations where it takes away. Yeah. I'm on some of those situations and of going away and talks about it and. You know what's combat of an hour talking about is you're very visible in those moments very alive in bad relationships if very, very alive indeed nor very senior, very present. You're very, but it's not good you up to you have to remove yourself even at that as you. Drama? Makes you very yeah was exciting. And it's so exhausting. What it is in the moment, if you're in one of those I, think at the time. As younger. Avoid all that. Is I have no interest in it. I'd like to write it to be involved in the world where you create is. kind of I'm always. Amazed by her. Altered I seem looking back some of those relationships you know. What I was so in thrall of so not. Out of control of my own control that fascinating I know being back here in London. It's clay is at the scene of the crime is is that? Is it some of them aging around? Yeah I said it just A. Very, close to. Working Living Right now. It's very Easy partially I wonder if you can never go back. I. Think about back to college. You might meet myself on a on a street corner not literally obviously, but just I might bits of the person I was then might seep into my consciousness. As a brilliant idea because I've been young and silly and carefree, but it also police cheaper than feckless. So self-defeating and I'd be angry back there again. So it's weird. Isn't it when you? Go to the headdresses and you have to confront the painful reality of this permafrost God that you've had in love with him, working window and. haring around town and I'm like, yeah you me to yourself in a way. But you're able to distance who you are now from that person did you said? Dude talking about kids we. Do some mentoring something or was like. Knowing who's you not not officially just kind of just to sort of every aunt that's just The there was a marvelous party. was. Pretty hammered I thought right well, I need to just go for some reason. I. Need to go into my car not to drive it was PASA point. He's just be in the car on the quiet and just have a word myself and sober. So they can bend return and don't because I love Danzig. To the kids. So thirteen fourteen Condiment. pucks locals. Bucks. Money's talk to you and. That's great. What do you need to say like within sexual? I'm returning. To leave the vehicle because this is not the way I wish. I just. That's really wanted to say. So I couldn't even bear. that. More weight than just. Nice. To share it with someone knows it's going to get it. I just. Before before. All of the identity politics astrum I've always just thought just it's not ever ever beholden to me to define somebody else's. What's a control their perception of their south or all that trajectory in life you come and see you anything you want to do anything and I'd go. Knock out. It doesn't take anything from me for you to be who you are. Anymore. Complicated than that for anybody I don't. CARE. What anyone sexual preferences have to bear on anybody else or or how they see themselves. That place in the world is is such A. Weird that you take against. Some efforts sandwich effort to prescribe somebody else's sheets. Effort. And Energy to need to expend like there's been occasionally though we kids come round and all sorts of law to. Be Cooking something I'll just hang. On I know really. Not even want to say something that I wanted to not wanted to find who they are. They just want to be around somebody different from their parents, right? Yeah. You just have the energy for a bit. And I'm also very childish. You know I have a great deal of Sports Mitzi life alleged prick about and I'll just. I have very few. Like, yeah would you want to do? Yeah that's great. I'm not a parent. Of course we must let off fireworks now all. I don't care et because. I have a zoo and you really branded as a rebounder. You know that the rebound us really to get you can say. Slimy, highly strong adult trumpets but the idea is that S- connotation Nevada's it's fitness Oh. Really I mean. You can fling yourself into the air and so great about trampling and I can't believe mobile go into this you can have wanted it basically the only legal you can spawn a neighbor. Hey Both sides you. Own Shaggy. But you. Calories on a trampoline running. So I go jumping for like a minute half I'm like. cooped. Jumping. On you on within thirty second bar. Sort of netting around it's like that it's a big one like that but it just netting. Excess, can a guy? Lost children that are subject children going, but it's not I. If I. If I had children or if more jody I mean. It's no. I don't I'm trying to justify we don't hardcore. Because this, Christmas, I had to do because you have family around and lots of different people don't see that much gathered together I felt like I was the spokesman fight and to politics. So what is this pen sexual I need to? Is that what is What is known binary and is it the same? No okay. Everybody wanted a time. Okay. Take a take a ticket. And you should have. Gone it's like I don't want to be the person that define even defining what those things mean feel slightly decided. They want to say they're not. In the person who's non binary define it for you. Not Somebody he asks is a woman. Am I did that's how I find myself. So I wish to speak for that commute speak for anybody apart from. Because what is this? I said just ask them. Okay The one thing that I just go off the questions I found really useful. With. We'll have to call someone they I mean that's not even grammatically correct. So think about this. If you have a friend who is coming for dinner and they bring your friend but you didn't know whether he's is he didn't. Go you please you do they. Are they beacon. That's in the same way that won't be will dance around this expertise these the gender-neutral permanent completely with the way that most people. Have coped early doors. Jing Jing clutching with the engineer. It's It. Generations it's been it's been being done. So true about the fudging thing about how you they game partner I hate partner. Do you? Yeah. I actually. Because I. Think Think I think it's it's for me as a leftover from. A fudgy time where where you'd say my partner and you would have to define the sakes I also seized were. Like, are you in business together? Are you are you get and I wouldn't refer to my? My. Girlfriend is a partner but I love it when straight people do I think? I find that. I. About your partner. They referred to that. Straight. Husband's partner I. think that's a deeply opening your well as. Being used to use it for. early on I, wish to find my girlfriend in that way, but it's like. Girlfriend. I. Little infants. I Think the name is fine. I just think also I don't necessarily wish them to have to be defined in relation to me. They are their own. Did you say grant? Yeah he's grunt. I I see my husband is. Also like my mind. I call him. Yes and. You off me about William my husband you said your mind. Nice. Nice word of course is very different. Terribly appropriate. Yes. Would never be able to. Do that because it feels like. It just feels like the my possession of course it's much more. It's it's for women. That's much more of a hot potato. I, don't want be anybody's woman it just feels right I. Yeah ownership and Yeah interesting. Just God. It was always like how? George Michael The Daily Mail always had lovers boyfriends. It's like my. Be, boyfriend were always trying to make. The lifestyle element that it was also. Trying to see exactly. That, there could be no emotional but I guess I. Guess That's something that game and sort of suffer from a lot is that that? You're is often seen by certain sections of the the meteors. sexualize all about sex sex sex and must be whereas I suppose for women. It's all about emotions drama the and of course, we have lots of sex and you have a lot of emotion and it's The often feels like they've been Austin going well, even in the gay community we. Gave Women. The emotion that the headline. Somebody else's headline. I've had relationships which extremely emotionally SORTA fum connected on surpassed Toco and ones that have just been driven by love stand by in the code life date. Don't know that we have shared values. But sometimes tried values on wide I just want. What's more interesting to discuss shared values just hold my daughter then. That where he only where you actually communicate. Spice. Ix. Litmus. Test results me did I want. Would I be happy to bump into a friend with them? That's a nine year if I liked them or if it's just sex. Every will come into. This is still the door if you're like. This I think when you come into my actual world. We can still. Ones completely into my world I stood still can only communicate. Short lived thankfully, but I guess I. Can only be short-lived because you know after a while, you need to be able to communicate in other ways than just sex. Different saints there's a limited. Alphabet Palace. But also I am sometimes deeply NBA. Maybe, this is want to sell men short and Complex needs and desires, but women just produced so much oxytocin when we have sex that you just with slaves to a hormones, I mean you'll slaves perhaps to your own set for months, but we want to biological imperative is. I really, I'm just really like Hugh now because we've shared some fluids and you find yourself being pulled even towards people aren't right for you. THREE HORMONAL AFFILIATION Whereas I've always been slightly envious of sort of gay male friends of mine just gone. Yeah. Gray and we have sex we have a laugh and then don't see this year and comes, and then you can take your time in that environment where you want overwhelmed by law for minds to work out whether they're ready wrote. I'm slightly jealous that. I can see I can see why you'd be jealous why sex isn't secret you can. You can just divorce sex and love. And I was thinking always do I don't wish to. Get when people have relationships that started US surf sex things named it. You know I think that's really Yeah, do you have a partner woman girlfriend right now? I know this. often on four seventy s and are you in. Deer. Public with her. In public with. Always. Always remind with my girlfriends. Yeah. Yeah. It's I. Suppose it's we've gone through a very interesting time. We shepherd at each other through a time of. A becoming older and so we we face huge challenges I think in and moving her going what is this four and? We've had to accommodate that. She's she's my age she's my age but would just at that point where you think do we want different things day once but with grownups that's what I love about her people are very, very honest. So you're like in your forty forties before you even. Not Tools right? Yeah. I. Think that's a huge difference on your. You've been around the block few times in your your limitations and you know your needs and we make. Ernest. Admire her capability to face down truth at first to have thirty house households called me about where we are in rap I couldn't have wished to be. At this time my life around someone like because life gets tougher as loss and complication. Crises of identity and those are the kids thing you guys feel that. But you need the notes the not having had. Provides A. Kind of. Context. For Living The I. I don't have so. Live without. The family your you know what I mean that kind Yeah. Because I I've been reading about adoption recently, it says even as a gay man, you need to be able to mourn that you can't have kids biologically you need to think about that and what does that mean and give that space and stuff I'd never considered. I. AM. That's really interesting thing. I mean. The social spotlight is always on. Women in a childless woman and. It's true. A childless mind that has an implication however roommates it may feel psychologically in the present we I was GonNa ask you. Because you. We're. Playing therapists to one another. This trim. I. Think. All great cost should be exactly that. But it's interesting that you were saying London I'm coming back home to this sort of this idea of the young me but you didn't talk about Scotland. That's also your cradle issue I do think it's going to I mean I. I I spent ten years here in London sample really super strong. Bounce six months ago and I direct message Nicola Sturgeon. New achieve to dependence can please come. On so an Cintas Oh God. Play. She did Them I. WanNa to ask people talk to you about cakes all the time. Sometimes. They tend to me about how why I don't do cakes time Mrs of sad that we don't do it and why did you go why not? Eating Kicks Oh this EMF. Geoghegan book tour and people would bring cakes and they would. The providence was not established, so they would just appear from. Tin Foil and they'd be slices have been caught so and I wouldn't have known the conditions in which it was caught. Things when somebody wants to say that just. Can't say, no, you can't and. Then you have to publicly. And I said I know I. I'm not a judge. I would be the person watching the people watching the Evans almost like come. Back tennis could fall back to that I know what you do intervene Vegan. Time. Latter coin of Lhasa. Kinda understanding. Of Movement but yeah I I'm really grateful for it now on the dust Assefa, because it just means today I just was pushing off to work and. Three people came in hugged meanwhile cheap. Hockey I quite so benign and I just want to get along. and. Because of. Yeah because they think they know me shortcut and. The kicker the. The might sometimes be traveling so it tends to be safe. Second Third Generation Indian kids will come up and talk to me about began Angie's because I went on this big pilgrimage there to the source of the Ganges, and it's this big Hindu pilgrimage. They want to make one day to look when asked me and I'm like hiding no I'm not a very good Hindu. I'm Catholic but I'll talk to you about shit and then you hugging and it's yeah, I said one of the Great. The great privilege of my job is I just get behind and hug strangers. Can you tell your tone a lovely story in which is in that kindness fame where because when you first started bake off, they were trying to make it really intense on the. On. The. Contestants right yeah. Just, shove cameras in people's faces go. Why are you making this this moment? Let the guy would go. Grandma. Well, how'd you grandma or? They cry in cry about their dead family and and so we resigned signed on at ten am on the second day into the we always resigning everything's walk we. Walk Away? Meanwhile this is sort of collective. Sigh of sorts of manages agents and but yeah, it was really aggressive and I suppose that was not and television at the time giant gets years. Yeah. Because it was expert. So I don't blame the production company. There's no judgment there. It's just you know that's how you do it. It's one of those shows and it's just like you know jeopardy jeopardy jeopardy ramp-up crap. We know we didn't roll like that. We never going to be the funniest people in the Roy Moore but we can really try to be the nicest and it's such A. Nice has become such. A disparaging word we should go up what's wrong with that I know what the decent well that's the kind I love Harry, styles and. His thing is W K treat people with kindness. High Now I. Love Him even more. Beautiful inside announced it seems seems to be. Everyone would be. Real Real, genesee. Side. Effects You. Will kind of. Just. Looking at him. Sexist let's do. Feature exploit. Directed video for one direction. Eight. That under a Bushel and All Nice or as Harry just a stellar heat. So heathen browned and shook every single person's hand on seventy left like in the distance was like I just want to say goodbye someone was up a lot of time. Harrison say goodbye and there was no calculation he just think. This is me completely guessing not entertain himself. Living that we'd job just went instead of became coming into the sides to engage. This imagine still that's really cool and then once we. He has beautiful. Hair found a way. Am I always think He's starting at much. Or something like that. That's how old I am. Now he's like, oh I'm still like. I know that you need to. Wear. Out Bombshell. Only. To do this. In trump. Now. There's no. Talk. Sex, what I? Did I. Agree. Yeah Joan book listening. Even well. I think actually Su said a really great thing but I just really the message of the I think we should be projecting to the and it was lovely. She said, I think it's quite a gay thing. You want to be the dazzling butterfly that's outside and you want to be inside with everyone else the moment feel accepted part of me wants to be transgressive and I think that's a healthy thing. I think that's a healthy thing i. think it's something that we we do we are. Starting this stage in the history of being Queer I. Think we still have that we have one in in society that is. Accepting us on or tolerating us. On, and we also need to feel that we have a special. We are special bond department. We still connect with each other brace those specialists, and also without the transgressive people who've made that had that feeling in acted on, we wouldn't be where I'm trying to I'm transgressive. transgressive I try to be. Yes. Harare. That last transgressive. Always. Yeah. Now listen I want everybody to keep writing into I want everybody to stand touch. So please write to us. And how does how do they rate to us the by a? Tape measure and hello. Not. The tate very to the computer. Hello at Homo Sapiens podcast come correct and if they were to leave on instagram well, Oh yeah. Absolutely. Do that to taking his twelve upsets. People. Do go off in the DMZ anyway. So I feel like that's. A well, trodden path is a fascinating, isn't it? and. Now if you feel like you need some sartorial brilliant, where would you possibly get some? You'd go to Alan coming to. The last. Conciliatory gestures I love it. Allen coming dot com forward slash shop and will be Allen Modeling declared, and you can click on me and it takes you to ever bots stolt. Darts. Event Bright Duds. Take you kid forward slash Homo sapiens slash Chris. Correct. It's ever press dot com forward slash hermit sapiens. Is has been so nice. I've had such a lovely time I. Loved Meeting these lovely people I've loved these little things that we introduced them and chat do love being agony uncle you've been brilliant. I would like to reiterate that I only ever had to volume in my life. Yes. But when I see CASILDA nobody, I mean as metaphor yes. Let go and we won't put a number on how many votes. Gosh. shelter, number of bottles of our BIKI. Vodka Gin I will finish this with the with the story that was probably. Is If I should say or not. When I made you about Kosovo, did you member United? Vodka Soda and. York in your house yet, and I poured the what I would consider the normal amount of vodka and said into the glass and then you came downstairs, you took a sip of it. gave me this look like a for God's sake and got the vodka free poured into the glass and I was like I know we can give. New York measures as a different one of the reasons I like living in New York is. The. Only reason. That mean. Little silver thing. Now just like like when I met club coming, keep the ice and. Then one, two, three, four, five, six, seven up. For the rest of Soda and there's a tiny my disorder. Love it they. Start the engines. I say that's right. But only here once celebre by.

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123 Author Olivia A. Cole

What Book Hooked You?

36:01 min | 2 years ago

123 Author Olivia A. Cole

"Welcome to what book hooked you. I'm brock. Shelly. Can thanks for listening on this absurd? I talked to alleviate a coal whose newest book on the nanny of beasts comes out on April sixteenth. This book is a follow up from a conspiracy of stars. Until we talk about both books. We talk about her writing journey her influence. She has from her love of poetry soliciting soa Livia, what book hooked you. Let book hooked me. I know I I know that this is the, you know, the the topic of this podcast their Dino the intro, but I I really struggled with coming up with one. So I don't know if I'm allowed to cheat. But there's two really that. Really hooked me the first book, I remember reading was called the king's equal, and I actually found it in my mom's house the other day. She was up rooting bunch of books that you've been holding onto me since they're haunt holding on for me since since I was a little kid. And now that I have a daughter, she's, you know, digging up all these books and NTN'er basement same take this stuff out of here. So and we actually found in the higher number this book. And so it's fresh on my mind, actually, if called the king's equal, and if it was a kind of a telling about the king who's looking for, you know, mates, and he's gaining villages and all this and on the woman he finds this. She's beautiful. She's smart. She Vichy that. But then she he's known for being very, selfish, ignorant and all these things. And so she says, hey, actually, you're not my equal. So maybe you should go out into the woods and do all these tasks or something I'm not remembering it well. But but I remember the writing was was able wasn't like other children's books. I had read and looking back. You know, it's, hey, maybe it was like masquerading as feminist from an appointment quite, but, but there was there was so much happening. And you know, I liked that for once the the woman wasn't trying to to prove herself. So I just about third grade when I read that and that really stuck with me and shortly after that, and also I should mention you know, I wasn't into like Princess stuff in queens and kings. That just wasn't my thing. It was one of the very few human books that I actually enjoyed most other books that I read for about animals, which is what my next book is was read wall red wallets. What really hooked me hooked me. That was the the book in the series that really made. Me want to become a writer, and and it still influences my work to this day. But, you know, read wall, if you're not familiar with it, it's, you know, animals, mice, and ferrets and foxes and badgers, and all these things that you know, I loved very much most of my closest friends were animals. I wasn't the most popular kid. And and I just thought so at home in the world that he created and my librarian at the school. God bless librarian. She somehow just knew that I didn't I wasn't comfortable in my human body. And she new just the book for me, so red Walvis what she put into my hands and into stage, my heart all these years. That's great. Yes. I have a little girl my myself and right now that's her kind of kick when it comes to book is animal books and stories. You know, and it was red wall. And it was also like some old stuff that I would touch book a ten foot pole now. Jack London, you know, like white saying and call it a while, you know, but I love stuff with animals. You know, there were humans in them. That was tolerable. But if it was all animals that was a win. It sounds like just from those two books that you mentioned that books were very much around an accessible, and you were very into reading and into stories am, I am I guess in right? Yes. Yes. I was a complete. I dunno bookworm relieving. Does it Justice? I was never not with a book. I was the kid who my parents. You know, thank God for them. Let me let me be the rude kid, you know, at the dinner he'd reading a book at the table. You know, when I was uncomfortable with, you know, the the company that we that person's house, we're wishy. They actually would really let me do other people's houses, but we have people over to our house, and I was uncomfortable. I've had anxiety mine tire life. You know, they would they wouldn't take the book out of my hands. So I always always had a book. And if I wasn't outside playing I was reading a book, and my parents made books really accessible to me anything, you know, like they my dad is an editor and a writer himself, and, you know, his shows were always, you know, in in the living room public, and I would just kind of go and pick through and that's how I kind of. That's how I think I found jecklin didn't actually white saying, you know, my dad had some old, you know, not the children's version had like the full versions, which are pretty by racist. But you know, reading them, I that's how I kind of became I think more sophisticated reader. I read the color purple that way, lots of books that I think I wouldn't have discovered. Otherwise, I'm for my age because my dad, and my my mom just had them there. And there was no questions asked. You know, you can read whatever you want, and I always appreciated that. And I think it is informed. The way I see the world and the way I'm parenting my own kids. And so you you kind of lewd too, I think with red wall that how much influence that had to as a writer. So when you were young reading the red wall series were you trying your hand at some sort of writing at that age. Yeah. Yeah. At that age. It was it was all plagiarism. It was pretty much. I guess you could call it fans fiction. And I I did a lot of you know, like third and fourth grade. Yeah. Like, even before that really I I didn't read read while until third grade. But in first and second grade, I was writing they had at the elementary school that I was at they had a young authors competition and every year, they would, you know, have you know, a writer stories down on notebook paper first. And then they would have copied them out very neatly onto like things he paper. And then they would bind them for us with cardboard and yarn. And I thought that was the coolest freaking thing in the world. And I thought I was a real author when I was first and second grade, and it's like I could do this. This could be fun. I would like to do this. So it was really early that. I was writing. And then once I've met, you know, read wall and its cast of characters I did a lot of fan fiction writing, and you know, using his worlds and not as characters but his world and in going going from there, and I don't even I feel like I jumped from like. Red wall to like, well, I remember even goosebumps. I did goosebumps and that, but I never really did a lot of four writing. But I I feel like I jumped from like middle grade to adult fiction somehow get I didn't really discover the joys of why until I was older. And so, but when you were a young adult in the white, what would have been the target market for why what was your relationship with books that kind of did reading kind of fall away for you, as you know, the teenage years or upon you or will you still an active reader during those years. Probably definitely still an active reader. I was reading lots of lots of kind of gritty books. I had a lot going on as a teenager. And I it's hard for me nicer. We're talking about the three something about why my wife focused on writing science fiction and fantasy mostly and just Topi in other words that aren't ours because I feel like I didn't have by. No, I didn't have a so called normal teenage life, and you know, do to use and, you know, lots of things I was just dealing with a lot. And so I didn't really know what a normal teenage world looked like so a lot of the things that I was reading were not normal. I mean, I guess I shouldn't say normal. Maybe I should say, happy and balanced within reading happy and balanced books. But there was a book. I remember reading called. I think it's called pure, and she is a writer was actually very young herself. And I remember to bookseller at my local indie Tony that. And that I, and I was really attracted to that books for that reason like she's not very much older than me. And she's writing about these things to me seemed very auto-biographical and so I- related to it a lot. But I read a lot of nonfiction as a teenager. But there was that there's a couple of novel. I read a lot of nonfiction about feminism and about anatomy, and I think that was kind of just me trying to understand the abuse it, I was going through and trying to put it in very I dunno clinical ways, you know, brain framework. So there was that. But I also read a lot of poetry poetry is really all I is far like when I think back of what the main thing I was reading poetry. I wanted to be a poet. I never thought I would write story after you know that. Early in fiction. I kind of that cell away from me reading never but running fiction did for many years, and I was a poet. And I started publishing poems when I was in seventeen or so there was a lot of contests that my teacher put actually, and I think he told me that you you run into Phillies of this classic art awards. I did that when I was in high school, and and I loved it. And it was so cool to me that I could, you know, make money or get money for school writing poetry. And that was that was the big thing that I did. So I realized poetry still Clifton Gwendolyn Brooks Frank x Walker was is a poet from Kentucky. And I went to the governor's school for the arts where I'm now on the creative writing faculty all these years later, which is pretty cool to come full circle. But he was part of the governor's school for the arts program here in Kentucky. And I was admitted for the creative writing program, and I met killing Manila's and Ellen Hagen who still writing poetry, and is now publishing young adult novels with Renee Watson, so. I met all those people and and I was like poetry poetry poetry. And it didn't really start writing fiction until I moved to Chicago and was almost done with college. And so you're in Chicago, what was that a vent or what made you kind of switch and focus on fiction. It's funny. You know, I think I think I never get tired of poetry. And I still not tired of poetry. I had some wonderful professors echo college in Chicago that made me still, you know, just to poetry another level for me. But I found the classes, so oh, I don't know just mind numbing. I didn't like learning poetry in the midst of some of the students. I think it was really know always talked about the MSA white dude in college. And there was a lot of MFA white dude that Columbia college, and they just really kind of stuck the joy out of it for me and not just white do either. I mean, a lot of the NFL. Why do we're in the form of women as well? And. I just you know, we would have arguments about like poetry can be political. I was like, whoa. That just seems so wrong to me. And I really so I think maybe that's what started pushing me away from poetry as far as them not pushing away from it. But making you kind of look around and see what else I wanted to write. But I took a short story writing class. It actually wasn't even short story writing classes. There's just a story a glass about the short story and examining different pieces, and I really loved it. I hated the teacher, but a really loved to curriculum and one day, I was standing in my very first department in my whole life in Chicago. And my dad had just gifted me a set of kitchen knives. And I don't know what I had read or thought about or eight I don't know. But I was cutting chicken in my kitchen, and we're looking down with an ice. And for some reason, I just thought man what if what if it was designed be apocalypse and just chicken. Was this kitchen knife was no longer like used for cutting chicken. What if it just suddenly had a completely different purpose? And by started writing, a look, and that was my first book panther and a high, and it went through a lot of revisions is my first novel. And I thought you know, it was Lena vols the only one I would ever right? But then it lends itself to sequel, and and I fell in love with with writing books, right novel man, this is fun. And then I remembered because I think I forgotten that I wrote stories as a little kid. I was like oh that this is really good. This is coming back to something like coming home. And so now I haven't written in for years. And so you mentioned panther and the hive which is is a little kind of post apocalyptic. Would you say am I am I right on? And so did that just kind of were you influence when you were writing that story by any other works or kind of as you were this idea for the story kinda came upon you what kind of guided you through the journey of actually completing the book. I you know, that's a good question. I cannot for the life of me. Remember what I was reading at the time. I I'm like, you know, in the short story class, I was taking vino shortly before that it was all, you know, nothing nothing fiction with all kind of like contemporary, and modern, and, you know, there's nothing sci-fi or anything or you know, speculative whatsoever. I think I might have read. Around that time, Margaret Atwood's orcs in Craik. And that definitely obviously if you've read that you or know anything about it. It's that definitely would have been a huge influence, but I also have the summary of I started reading that after I started writing. Oh, wow. This is really like this. I I'm glad I'm reading this. This is really helpful in thinking about how to write this kind of world. But it was just, you know, being in Chicago, I had, you know, vowed when I left Kentucky from high schools, not applying to a single college in state. I'm leaving Kentucky never looking back. And I I didn't apply to any schools and say only had my leaving. And I settled on Chicago. And it was just such a different world for me and in the best way possible. And so in love with it. And and I think that love of Chicago. Kind of got injected into this book and also into the character tasha, she, you know, I love her so much, and I think it's evident when you read the book, it's like almost somehow it's personal that book just feels so personal to me. I I loved the character. I loved the city so much. I was in love with it. And I hated a lot of the things that happen there. As far as, you know, you know, inequality in the city, and racism and gentrification, and you know, all these things and health insurance. And that's really what the book will. I'm not gonna say that with the book about the book is about a lot of things. But I was really thinking a lot about health insurance at the time. And the way, you know, poverty is almost weaponized and in how well I kind of twisted that wealth is now being weaponized, you know, so, you know, the poverty is weaponized against the poor. But then the well that means wealth is also a weapon, so what would happen. If a lot of story writing. Process starts with what what would happen in. Or what would you know? What if this what if that? So what would happen? If there was, you know, this company that was responsible for our health care, and you had to be rich to get it. 'cause it's kind of you know, kind of not too far off, you know, from the facts. But but also, you know, if it was all the things that, you know, we are we know are to be true. But the way people are screened and the way people are on discriminated against like what if those are just on the front page, you know, and in all those what is just lead to more. What if but it was it was fun to write? And they were scared, right? Because it was my first novel, but I still still my favorite. I think I think I get more emails about that book than I do about my my theory with a conspiracy of stars in anatomy UBS, I get a lot of emails about panther. And a high of people that kind of find it in the underground. They're like what is this? What is it who you know, where? What three and I promise book three will come one day. But not right now. And was the journey to getting panther in. The hive published was was that was many obstacles there. Did it? Take a long time. So actually self-published panther in the highest I so yes, there are lots of obstacles. I I wrote it, and I got a lot of interest from it or for it from a couple different. There's a couple of agents that were really hot about it. But once it it was they they saw the early version, and it was very immature. And I was surprised I'm looking back. I'm surprised that they you responded to me at all because it needed so much work. But there was a couple folks that were really interested in it. And I was revising revising. And then I went to be for the first time, and I those my I like big book event, a friend, a friend invited me he was publishing his not first book, but one of his first books, and he invited me up for launch party. And we were you know, there, and I was introduced me to agents, and and and this was in twenty one four thirteen maybe twenty thirteen and an agent said, oh, it sounds really interesting. I had done all this like my little marketing. By had you know, like my little swaggie things to give away with information about the book. Oh that sounds fascinating. You know, it would probably be so easier if you made the main character white, and I was like, oh, and it just like it just upset me so much, and I was so angry, and I was at my friend's party. So I couldn't even make a stink, you know. Because I didn't want him to get, you know, anybody look at him funny. So I was just very angry about it. And and after all the rejections that I had gotten in like, oh, we would like to if you did this. It was like you. If he did this. I was just so fed up with the whole thing. Like, you know, what I'm just gonna sell foolish myself. Because also be a guy Kawasaki was they're talking about his book author publisher entrepreneur eight and that was the first time I've ever heard anything about so publishing. That's like, you know, what he makes it sound really intoxicating. I'm gonna do this. So I that's what I do. And I'm very glad I did it. I have you. Now, I'm glad that I had that experience. Because now going in with, you know, a big publisher. It's a completely different experience. And a lot of things that similar a lot of things or not. But but it is mostly a very different experience. And I'm glad I have it just so that I can have some perspective. But yeah, it was there. I got gotten emails, you know, in the last year so saying, hey, you know, from a couple of agents are not agents. I'm sorry editors, you know, saying I know I've read about this your, you know, the first two books, but what are you doing with the third one? Like, you know, thinking, maybe neither small houses, you know? But like the third one can be published somewhere. But I still don't know. And I I don't know if I want to publish anywhere other than so publishing over three as well. Because I it's kind of my baby. Now, you know like it's my baby now. And I now that I've seen those so publishing in traditional. I kinda don't wanna put tasha luck at through that ringer. You know, so yes, it was it was a long road. And no did not get published it, and and I wouldn't change a thing. This great. It's interesting. But so let's talk about because panther in the high it had a sequel. But now we have the conspiracy of stars and an anatomy of bees which comes out on April sixteenth. So let's talk about this in way, where if people haven't had a chance yet to read about it conspiracy stars were not spoiling anything. So why don't you kind of tell me the world and the story of these two books. Sure. Yeah. So I I had the idea for a conspiracy stars. And I was on a mega by and actually found a Facebook memory the other day, you know, Facebook pops up like this year under stay today, or you know, whatever whatever year, and I don't remember. The unite wanna say twenty fifteen or sixteen maybe twenty fifteen I it was like me posting on this day. You know, whatever year saying man, I tell him about the really good story ID on a mega bus today. And then I looked at it like, oh crap. That was a conspiracy stars in. I just everything came rushing back. But I was on the megabytes. And I heard a mom on the phone with her friend talking about her daughter and how she wasn't doing well in biology, and she didn't want to dissect the frog or whatever. And and she said, you know, oh, poor Caroline, or whatever her name was, you know, she just I don't know. She has it inner to be a doctor. She wants to be a doctor. I don't know she has an inner she's got too many feelings she's too sensitive. And I was like what you know, like since when our feelings in science and medicine, you know, the enemies like this. This doesn't make sense. And I just kind of got to thinking about the ways that science can be both wonderful and also terrible when it's not wielded with humanity. And I was thinking about animals, you know, 'cause that's as we've stabbed her horrendous interview animals are my thing. And so I just started writing about this young woman on this planet. She's new to this planet. Follow we've and her people are all scientists say it's a research colony that, you know, they fled their origin planner. It and landed here buying steak is what she learned. You know, what she learned throughout her license? And you know, they crash landed here, and they are using science to survive they're studying animals on February's and looking at their adaptations and the way that they survived in two. So they too concerned by and it's all she wants to do, you know, all the only option, you know, there's there's nothing else you become a white coat both of her parents are, you know, very influential in the community, and they that that's that's her her trail. You know, that's the only thing she can do. But she witnesses something one night when she similar. She's not supposed to be with a boy who has recently moved into her commune. And she and she sees something that changes her mind about her parents, and she starts realizing that things aren't what she thought. And that man, maybe there's more going on here. And maybe our pursuits on solid we've or not as honorable and. You know, fewer is she thought so, you know, secret secret secrets, but you know, like, you said, no, no spoilers. So a lot happens and anatomy of these delving deeper into the world now that she has uncovered to be secrets what is she going to do with them. And so it's it's been called a conspiracy star some I I've heard people call it slow, which I'm not offended by it. Slow burn for sure it takes it. There's a momentum that builds. And then by the time it's built it's like it blows up at the end, but anatomy, visas like a sprint. It's it's a very like we're already immersed in the world. You already know Octavia. You already know, you know, who's people are what's happening. And it's just go go go the whole time. So I tell everyone, you know, you get through a conspiracy stars. And learn all the little details. You can because they're all gonna come into play in anatomy. It'd be. And I can kind of tell you can see that from the book covers 'cause conspiracy of stars. It's like that flower that plant so it's kind of got away to grow whereas anatomy of bee's it's that kind of macabre skull. So, you know, it's it's a much different animal. Right. Use that pun. Absolutely. Yeah. There's a lot of mysterious nece in the first one. And there's you know, I'm I I think about things I I really I like I like Twitter, you know, I like twists, and I think that some people were like, oh, there's no really there's like a little bit of a twist conspiracy stars. But but my twist they're kind of like the long game. We gotta hang in for the long game, and you know with with conspiracy of stars. And that'll be a base. There's you know, you had to invest a lot of time into world building and developing the setting and and these characters in the in the situation that they're in. And I'm wondering, you you kind of mentioned that you haven't written a poem in for years, but has your kind of love of poetry. And you're writing poetry does that kind of build into when you go about building these worlds and kind of painting that word. Picture for the reader. Absolutely. I hope so anyway, I hope so I still one of my favorite piece of feedback. From beta reader was were you pull it before? I know it was like yes, I was. And I am because they they kind of felt that what you're describing that. There's I would you know, my I would like to say there's a literary aspect to it, which I don't think you see a ton in science fiction and he's not hard science fiction. You know? But I do I can't help it. We're not looking to do on purpose. I just can't help it. And I also just I have such a love of the natural world that I think just lend itself suppo-, I think I see poetry and everything even agree stuff. So you know, I as just how my brain works. But and I honestly like when I was writing a conspiracy stars. I like tried not to read any poetry like, no, this is a very serious book, and there's no room for poetry and this book, but it showed up anyway. So I. Kind of just let it happen in an obese. And then what kind of made a conspiracy stars in any B's? What did you always know when you have had this idea because of that bus ride the conversation that the character was going to be a young person in the us? It was going to probably fit into the white category. I think. Yeah. I think I did know that it was going to be a young adult book because she I saw myself so much as like, you know, young Olivia. I'm actually one of the big revisions of conspiracy stars was that editor was like she feels too young. You know, she doesn't feel sixteen. She feels like thirteen and I definitely agreed with that. I think it was like I made even considered it being a middle grade when I first set out writing because it's so in a way like, you know, a middle grade you have the kind of coming of age experience. That's like a little tamer. You know, if that's the word pain because it makes like why is something like, you know, wild beast. But like, you know, it's just the the revelations that she's having like middle grade, you kind of sometimes learn maybe you can't trust your parents. You know, maybe your parents aren't he thought they were and like those revelations that younger people have whereas, you know, you get to sixteen relations. There are a lot different. You've already realized you trust your or sometime. But but I feel like, but I felt like this person. I'll tell you, you know, in the story in in so many ways, you know, she had she had been so sheltered. So yes, she's sixteen but she also does feel younger because of the world she's living in, you know, she's a very serious student and her people say, you know, like, oh, she's too serious. I don't like her. But that's all she's had, you know. She's that's all she's had. So I in some ways she does feel younger. But I think that that's it's in the world that she's in. I think it's justified that her her exposure to, you know, other possibilities of the truth other than what she's been told the truth. It's it's such a smaller community. It's easier to it's easier to keep that secret. You know? So I yeah, I did envision her as being a younger person. But like the how young has been kind of in flux, but she's maturing a lot. She had to you know, so Inada BBC's. Different. So panther in the hive had a follow up anatomy of beasts is a follow conspiracy of stars. When you're kind of thinking through this story. Do you automatically kind of built in that there's going to be two books or two different stories to tell within this world are kind of come through the actual writing that you kind of discovered that there's going to be more to tell a great question. That's something that I've asked myself a lot actually like in how to organize what I'm what I'm doing. I'm writing contemporary right now. I'm like this is one this is one book. This is the story is going to be in one between two covers whereas with panther and a highs I always envisioned it as a trilogy where, you know, book one she's in Chicago book to she's traveling no spoilers, but she's traveling. And in book three is what happens when she reaches that destination. So that how that one formulated it so whereas with the conspiracy stars it was supposed to be. Books. That's how I pictured dwelling. And then I got to the end of conspiracy stars. And I was like, Ooh, I might be in trouble here this this. This went a different direction than I thought. And then I started writing Natta movies. And I was like, Yep. I'm in trouble here. This is a this is a trilogy also. So it's it that one kind of threw me for a loop. Usually, I try to know where I'm going. But sometimes the story has other ideas. And you you briefly dropped the breadcrumb that you're writing contemporary now. And so you've wrote PO post apocalyptic SCI fi you're writing contemporary. So it is that do you want to try to continue to play with different genres of writing as you continue to think about the is. And and published books. I definitely do. Yeah. I do. I actually I'm not allowed to get any details about this yet. But I have a picture book coming out this as well. Yeah. I'm really excited about that. Because that was complete. New for me never saw myself doing that. But then I also never saw myself as a parent, and if the best thing in the world, and so the picture book in my opinion. But, but no, I do I want to explore many things, I I've got, you know, a couple of stories in the pipeline where I those still veer back more towards fantasy and science fiction, but the contemporary I it's been calling me for a while. I wrote a first draft of it in twenty fifteen and it was a failure in twenty sixteen. And it was a failure. It I I know what I wanted it to be. And it was not that. And I was very thank God is in get published. You know, my baiter ears were like, no, no, no. This isn't doing what you think is doing and now so I just put it away through to really not much of it salvageable these not for what this what it ended up being. But so the newest drafts I'm revising it right now. And it's it's doing what I wanted it to do. So it was I didn't really have a choice. I feel like with that one that can I consider myself a contemporary writer, as I said earlier, I think I kind of have made more towards science fiction and fantasy 'cause I don't know what a normal teenage life looks like. But here I am ready to book where hey, wait, this this young woman is not a normal teenager either. And I think it for some reason it just never occurred to me I've always seen as like a story. I'm not allowed to tell because you know, I don't know it just feels like crossing the line something like, you know, she she's not normal either. I was like, oh, I can do that. But I can just 'cause still think what I'm trying to say that writing a, quote, unquote, normal teenager didn't feel like it would be authentic or you know, it's not like, I people would read this and be like this, isn't it? What a teenager know person a normal teenager does. So I was like, oh, that's right. I can right. What I know. So that's what I'm doing great looking forward to it. And so a few questions as we wind him the first one being what is your? Favorite movie based on a book? Well, oh, I I I really love the Princess bride. I it was someone. I I thought I think I was man. I was young. I was like maybe fourth grade or something, and I hadn't I felt the movie I so I didn't know it was based on a book and my grasp of humor. I didn't know that it was supposed to be funny. I found it was funny. But I was clearly taking itself very seriously. So no, this is supposed to be funny on just weird. But then as I got older I wash again, and you know, I watched it again. And again, and again, oh, this this is funny is and then I read the book and just the way that that humor translates, you know, between the two, and I feel like having having read the her seen a movie, I kind of changed things for me. And you're you're supposed to read the book, I, but so as far as reading the book first, and then, you know, a movie based on that, I really love pride and prejudice. The the cure nightly version, which I know there's people out there. They're going to fight me over that. I'm so sorry. But I love it. I've got you know, nostalgic memories attached to it. And I'm oh, I love pardon prejudice. But I really love care ninety version. Yeah. Those are both popular answers. So really, yes. Yeah. That makes me feel so much. So the next question is there a book or a series of books that you're willing to admit that you've either never read or never finished? Okay. So there's I yeah. I'm willing to admit is the key here. So there's one that. I'm not gonna say became. Yeah. 'cause I think I'd be in trouble. Yeah. I'm not gonna. But so the one that I've never I will admit to I've never read lemony snick it. Okay. Yeah. The in series unfortunate events. Never never I feel like I tried once maybe I was too old at that point or something. But it didn't really get me in. Neither did the the movies. You know, feel like we'll just watch the movie, and if you don't like the books, and I try that man just doesn't do it for me. And then finally, what is the last great book that you've read? I love this one. The last great book that I read is an unkindness of ghost by river. Solomon. It's kind of a a dystopia science fiction. But it's you know, just token thing it's all these people that are living on a ship. It's like what they call a generation ship. So the society has been formed, and it's just masterful Riverstone minutes such a poet we're talking about poetry and how it affects world building. Oh, man. That's the book. That's the book. I wish I had read it before I wrote a conspiracy of stars. Because I feel like I learned so much from it just, you know, like ways of speech that different characters have in like the different, you know, the the levels of the ship and how they interact with each other. And then just reef I learned so much about Greeks from this book. So big fan of of that book. It's well, Livia anatomy, obese comes out on. April sixteenth follow up to conspiracy of stars. And I wish you and this book all the best. Thank you so much for having so much fun. And that does it for this. I want to thank Livia cold for joining me. Her newest book, an anatomy of beast comes out on April sixteenth. And we haven't already, of course, you're going to want to check out the first book conspiracy of stars. And we want to check out any of the other books of writers that she mentioned during the episode. You take out the show notes. I'm Brock Shelley. And until next time keep reading.

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Top 5 Comics Podcast - Episode 147 - Speed Metal

Top 5 Comics Podcast

2:06:01 hr | 7 months ago

Top 5 Comics Podcast - Episode 147 - Speed Metal

"This is Margaret Bennett you're listening to the top five. MIAMI. Command Man. Banning. PODCAST. Comics pop culture events earlier. Today we have masters, Vassar Josh forty-five Go Yoyo And we have me, CBS. Yo. I guess. You'd be more than me. Like our does Yoyo than that I, don't like that at all you know what they are. You like to play with him. Any more tricks than you think it was. Really, good at him for a while. When I was in high school had a radio station job. I spend a lot like. I was on the air as just a DJ jobs like running other like the broncos games. Sure. I just came from a feed from the big radio station resided. Sat there in like. Fed it through the board and had to play our commercials when it was like a local commercial. They had national commercials as well. Then so had just had this town at a set free like the entire pregame. Post game was probably six hours right a sat there. And it got really brilliant at the Yoyo. Because I spent six hours like every Sunday. You could do everything. Shoot the moon, walk the dog do the what's the? Cradle cradle on cats by casting cradle those coins rock the owner. has a million names. I could do a bunch of different things as pretty fun. I got really really really good by. What it was the the two brothers to comedy was the am an or those guys his name's. John, talking, about comedy. Yeah, it's old timey style. They Visa travel around a lot. They have a TV show for a while to back in the seventies. From athlete cut up and figure that out for. Bringing about but my brain has remember him with their names are meeting must have high school friends because we got kind of addicted IOS. Troy Troy he went and did like he got. vinyl stickers for him so All the Blue Yoyos that we had he made a little minute stickers and for all the Green Yo but lands on there. For All the white ones I think he put. Do for White Pink Zam on the white for some reason like lightning. Yeah. But later on a makes sense as before he had a cake noise, we have kate but so as long bigger now with a hood and everything, but I think the white heated Zam. And then we had. Did Flash to like the stickers were perfectly weighted. So got him on the right. It made the just. That much more heavier. So it made a better. Nice I had six or seven would wants to videos NFL time. But The prisoner thinking about is thomson others smile. Down here. I knew if he said I'd probably remember. Russia their last touring show fry them stopping to ring I worked MATT EVENT HERE IN COLORADO Color Location Subsidy Yeah Funny Enough I get the dude. Teaching the. In addressing himself is cool. Sure. The three students did stuff follow into the seventies had no no that. I'm saying that it's crazy in their golden years with. The forties. As crazy. Yeah it's weird stuff. Nor you now. Anyway. So as far as upset say number one, hundred, forty, seven. He we're GONNA be on over DOCU number. For Marvel Comics. An unkindness of Ravens number one. and. This guy is from booms studio comics or booms. US. Then the ad dark nights death metal speed metal number one. I should do that at the end. So next, we'll be juggernaut not number one for marvel. They will finish with the dark knight's death metal speed metal number one from DC comics. Speed, mail be ready in one shot. You know the DC one shot bigger issue is so so that'll be the DC for the evening so big and it is true. On a little bit news there. Josh. You're puts new. Sort of new stuff. Watching made history for. The first time that? Adapted show turn one six nominations at the amies. Won Eleven in total including best limited series and Best Actress Limited series offer. Jean King says the HBO Watchman Show. A lot of things circuit. Wise. I probably should watch more episodes of it I've been told that my mobile. Um answering pretty big deal as far as like. Combat Flavored adaption things. MARLINS released pages and a few the covers for that coming Star Wars High Republic series. I it's. Ongoing book. It is GonNa be a few like titles in this whole. New Republic time line But as far as the books are concerned that the one of the first ones now Phil Noto on it and the rivalries. Kevin Scott. this one's really set two hundred years before the feminists. The first book is currently said come January fifth. So yes, we'll see that sticks. One of the other ones. WanNa. Main ones in the series of Charles Soul, book Charles Souls Me Doing A. Series called light of the Djeddai. So with our retired public via the JANAI. and. This is going to feature jet I master name the Stellan Geos. Who's going to have an excalibur style lightsaber so that whole thing. Car like collor orense but more. Good not broken. So. Pure adhering to the EXCALIBUR lightsaber. All stuff's going to be sadly, there's pictures of it online now, like the design pictures, it looks cool. It's a lot more sortie than. Than A normal sabre, but the way it's built the hill comes out of the handle so it can look both ways. which genius? Anyway it looks really. Cool. How that's going to apply to the story now, I mean is two hundred years before. Most of. The the Star Wars. Convention thing they do. Celebration he has a celebration comedies books a little bit. There was like very vaguely the name they the nation kind of said like time period. Round I think Yoda's supposed to be in at periodic. I. Do know a little bit about it because I listened to another random star wars podcast. I stumbled upon rows board on day, and so they it was the day after celebration happened in it's always talk about so. So. That's the only. Way. Listen about ten minutes of his I can't listen to this but then I like went microbes, read about myself and say Oh. Okay. But it's just like it's button novels and stuff so to say these comic adaption. Yeah. So they first factious I guess was souls both so they must be doing like comics like the comic versions of like offshoots or something like that because they talked about it's going to be a lot. This is going to be like the basis and is even talk about the next run films are gonNA be based in this time period is wells saying I mean that's just the talk. 'cause it. Sure. And you it'll be real young and he'll be appearances and things in that and stuff stuff and things but. Anyway I. It was very vague at the time but so like as you start talking about it, all came back to me. So I remember a lot of the so. but at the time, I can again, they just kind of like barely talk about it. This is new information probably a celebration. But as far as like writers Charleston a good writer, he's a handful of Star Wars book are ready for for marble. So. He's good until not why like an artist so I mean, all stars books they've actually done in the modern. Star. Wars Marvel having pretty good. I mean, there's a couple of dozen the middle. Seventy five issue run as star wars and you only have like maybe five there. Might Great. Or not. I guess questionable that. As. Pretty good. So As far as the series that are concerned, they don't they done too bad with any of those later ones have been really good and he'd be like, Docker River series are fine to i. think she's great but she weird as one the group really that her in the guy. As far as series visit going to be another branching path other series is inside of it. So I guess the main one they save ongoing right now but that's Subject just like everything else you know what I mean. see speaking of Star Wars Cinderella. Yeah You and me we talked about this and I know that Redo News by feel like we talked about this, we may not at this but I don't know Dawson is playing a soak it in men during season to right that is actually confirmed We've talked a little bit about some rumors about maybe both fat Navy Mark Hamill Making appearances at but dozens ASAKA. In Medellin season two, which is really cool. Yeah. Awesome, and again when it comes to the excalibur asks style lightsaber thing the dark saver has that kind of feels while which is. Probably, play heavily in the season and I think part of the. EXCALIBUR part is the way the hill opens up zones up look like toward. So, think how resort excel so Let the whole time like really really like old school darkhorse like old republic like. Books and things like very early and cith for shed. I cry and there was no there was actual to source rice. It wasn't lightsaber. So that makes sense of some sort of like. Original source slash. Hill. Thing that turns into a lightsaber as well now. So it would make some make sense that way interesting to see how it plays off the act like it's one. So I don't know. This particular jet is is going to be his main thing. I mean like all the follow up novels even with John Volley stuff. We had guys whose lights did particular things like there's one who's lightsaber could extend extra three or four feet or something. So like. Having different ice it was different things. It's not it's not like unheard of or Macau Guitars could do that. He's only extent I can remember the he was he was from A. Video Game Super Nintendo thank you the main character Oh maybe dark pyre note I mean that was that was a game I don't know that's the game you're talking about brain wise I don't remember that anyway he was like a jet I, that was. Kind of in training for loop. Ano-, some sort expand university obviously went away when Disney but he had a special. Cow Qatar now's purchased him hit. Yeah. I. I don't remember the name they fluish ships similarly looking to the Millennium Falcon, but it was like. Solar the cockpit was a little bit different, but it looked kinda like. Moscow. And the brings them back with all this impasse will. Read reprinting a bachelors. Dark dark dark horse books in what they call Star Wars legends in. They're not technically Canada but brought you know they have brought some mess up back like thron is very. Know he was very much darker salient honor. while. He was actually more than the novels he was tonight Zahn tunes on didn't should have been the complex afterwards wasn't a thing wherever right the new order of. Star. Wars. Within us to Rad not us he's awesome. Yeah like he's he's one of the cools empire characters are. Good bagger. He's not even necessarily a bad guy he's just. Cold and calculated and is found himself on that side, and he's like supposedly the only alien that ever made grant animal underneath Patine. They're very anti-alien actually very exactly, and that's a huge thing. That's how that's how amazing he was. So his easy. Red Character. Always. Liked him. See a little. Another news is archie comics is going to be going to. Date end digital release, the same date with their books which I mean. Okay whatever. Sits Archie. So instead having a waiting period that most other companies have on. Digital. Day and date released. So digital comics out the same day as print comics. And Sabrina the canceled on Netflix's have last season. says. He's connect because archie flavored reason that's. I saw the Elvis Kinda cold. It's not. It's not. netflix related buying games but. Some marvel put out a trailer for Marvel's six, one six, which is going to be a group of short films all done by different directors mostly like aspiring new directors, I guess. says. Edema total. And each of the different movies is supposed to. Connect Marvel in that way that the Marvel Universe's the anniversary outside your window and Lake Villa play and artists and one of the about the The Japanese spider-man. Which? Surprisingly very different from the regular spider-man. So, like all those things are becoming after Disney plus the way they towed it his all the episodes are watchable a single movies. But they're technically part of eight part series. And the trae looks kind of cool. I mean it some of it seems a little soap boxy but. Could be who you are terms why that's so butter not you know what I mean. Right. Kind Kinda cool is definitely interesting. Also that was filmed I. Guess during Kovin and people using pieces of real life and stuff around it for how they're affected by tomorrow situation. The properties and things. On the trailer thing look really cool. So I'm interested as you what it's worth. What is this about sizes to watch partly? Sunny. CW's supergirl is getting dense Ke's rhymes can't pages last season. Cancelled they're just finishing. Yeah I. Mean It's it's a canceled because that's what it is. But yeah, it's it's it is ending the season I. Guess. There's rumors. She's GonNa Cameo like. With the Sutin though for the beginning industry at lows. So yes, war green. Arrow. Rightly ended him. He was in everything else right. Well, he's characterize Noah's in care anymore. But. We could see return from that. I, mean it's the same. They haven't held. Jordan if they took the hell your in being the specter use that instead Raniero. So, right. But I mean he they ended the show then he was still in all the other stuff. Just, this crossover at the end. Yeah they. They're having supposed to come back to with with the daughter, bar. Green narrow which I don't know that still happening anymore or not. But WHO's GONNA. Move forward has been green. Arrow in the. CANARIES are. crear guys green or something, but it was herbal and Green Arrow and the to black and areas of still around life wise on the shows. So. That's happening or not anymore no. Superman Lois Lane show which with that guy who look like Superman he's. been. Shot happening not every hating what you? Will do still happening. something sacred from shows. So spun me announcement about the issue three, hundred eleven he's going. Very cover mytalk McFarland memorializing CABOT Bozeman ause bomb. It's the picture is actually frigging awesome It's Chadwick spine you for doing the. Ghana forever pause. And like. The pictures. Great. It's really awesome He also released a statement along with it that praises praise, Javad Bulletin for distant personally was and that. We shall admire. The traits they shared with all of us. The type of person he wasn't Kinda guy was really Kinda. Cool statement release. And leg the cover itself looks frigging. Awesome. My it looks great. I'm so that's pretty neat I. think that's really cool. ultimate share Bozeman News like. Doing Banners. On the back of a lot of the issues, this one had a memorial image for him on the back of the books. So there are a lot of those within the sun, his current month and the pictures pretty freaking core so Anyway. So that's neat. That's happening. Last thing I really had is at the Elliott COMECON said it's happening. And that illegal aliens back to new news about how they're gonNA handle that thing as far as space and how many people are allowed in the waiter selling tickets. So like the way they're gonNA be doing it is in session. So every day the three commission will have to separate timeframe sections sessions. Sorry sessions with the days that one is in December I wanNA say December. Holgado shut down hold your breath December nine eleven California's already like. Brought back so many times it's. Like, they're the worst one I don't have any doubt about that today the fire situation such as. The made the announcement they were moving. To December and like two weeks later stay closed again, this Badgen over major discount today. Well no today probably last week. and. It did this point they still seem moving forward but I agree with you I don't think at all. I think by Tom Again there. It'll be a different story in less unveils drastically changes in the world for the better part of things. But the way they're saying it's GonNa work is that over three days? Though via a morning session and evening session and guess when you buy your tickets, you hit the pick three sessions to go to. And I'm sure they have a limited number of whatever they allow. Her thing is they're saying Wyoming thirteen thousand people we normally show takes in for forty one thousand. So. By making the sessions I, guess it'll be thirteen Chris session. So you don't get billed for a full day have today and how can police no idea. Because it seems like a crazy head. Trad check our bodies and move everybody out in her to have next batch command. UNDOABLE but. The way they're talking about this morning sections will be. Nine am to two PM and the afternoon sessions will be three PM to eight. So, you have to our middle, be a window to. Clean New People out of there I. Guess. So I guess we'll see if it works. I mean. As a thing, I think it's interesting shelter move forward. I I'm with you. I still think that by then is very possible. California's still closed down and. Either the fire situations underhand if takeover situation isn't then you try to have this without being a major problem. But. I. Guess we'll see. Is. Interesting that they're still trying. For News whereas stuff today I think we might talk with before. It gets as one more little thing. I can't remember actresses name now. So it doesn't really help, but she'll got cast finally. So talked before his chick from orphan black, which if you haven't ever seen hats, you really should because it's fantastic Giving her again. I can remember if we did it or not. I think we brought it up on us and then. We might have. Never done probably when into her filmography. As an actor ladies. Awesome. Again, like you said, you haven't seen BBC show over black. Is Great Really Good So check out on. Looks. Yeah. Have you live in running I just wanted to throw on more action figure worrying to be kind of talked about Braille Academy for they boss Fight Studios. this season we did talk about it a little bit several episodes ago, but they did to show they started they just started day. So when we listen to this, check it out as it's like, they don't I think they're gonNA do one week throughout the first mockups of the I figure which is really really cool also. Doesn't mean multiple waves. I don't know who they're going to do how and Wayne and all that kind of. A picture of the Dow liner, the structure outlined for cha-cha. Like the blueprint is I don't know what you call the mangams. That's obscene. Yeah. That's that's the me they he's okay. as the first one but they're gonNA do like one a week or two weeks or something for a while until they. Threw a one at least I don't know who all they're GONNA do they've it's been really unwraps. SC because I think Gerard Way. Has. I don't. Like it got released under somebody in the Middle East. The second series under a different company retirement, the comics or comic now commonplace come out dark. So dark was put out the comex with they're going to do comic ones as well. Said sounds like what we're getting is probably figures and the comic figures which would be the Flash Gordon which serve in this make any sense boss by studios amazing action for your toil independent action figure toy company that does like started out with our very first thing was the income Trivia Max Naidoo like they did like a Greek mythology action figures, and they're very compatible with a bunch of other one eighteen scale. If you don't want eighteen scale, it's basically your four inch. Star size things so You know originals of those as we say that that is like all the new Jagellon Star, chef like all the big stuff is the six inch line, but that's beside the point. So anyway. by studios kind of is just the flagship company right now they're an independent company they started with a kickstarter and since that kickstarter they've. Done. No kickstarter anything. They've just funded themselves with everything in a bunch of the people are so impressed with their ability to put out. Top. Quality figures in lies in packaging and everything like they keep getting these new series. So they got the Bucko hair. They got Flash Gordon. Got Zoro they got Tarzan they have You have a six inch line, the ledge of Lucia leisurely. which is like actual literally like actual like Mexican wrestling people like talk about they also have a fantasy lion, which is like nights and wizards and. ORCS in things like that, and they have helps els there's always as well And they're just a really amazing company because they give like independent brick and mortar stores like their own exclusive, just to help support independent brick mortar stores, and that just they're just a really cool company to help of other companies who like done kick starters to do their own toy lions. Boss fights been over in China or wherever else worked in the factories trying to get their product down there. Hey. By the way we had that same problem. Here's how you fix it. So they help other companies get all their stuff figured out as well. So they're all they're about is the product and there's amazing. They seem to I. Don't I don't know even personally but. One of the main designers do this design stuff for like star wars and G. I joe, and all sorts of big stuff like he actually followed US actually figuring instruction. We had that conversation. So you know they have a lot of really cool people working for him and it's just amazing toy line which so that they're doing the umbrella academy line now, which is amazing and they're going to be doing comic book accurate and movie or TV show accurate figures bowl is going to be an ongoing line. So there's no end in sight. So it's really really really fun really cool because it's such a cool series both things are cool series. On so I'm pretty stoked on it because like they're. Kind What's his name? Is the number one or whatever like the Gorilla version I'm kidding I'm curious how they're going to do that because they haven't done a lot of big series yet and so. On top of that, they're going to do. I think my biggest one that I'm really excited for is a crack in the comic book version with the. Prison drives in the purple in the night is. I think that's going to be really really exciting. When they got One of the other lines that they have, which makes sense for like the kid versions is the gotta the Little Prince. Kids could book in the him tell Fairy Tale type here till animation looking with a Fox is. Like a little kid versions in the school school uniforms and stuff like that. The they're making molds because they're they're cross using molds for different things like Nova little kids like the be able to reuse arms and legs this shirt or different things. I mean they just Kinda managed can kill it across the board. So I am pretty excited for that because I you know. Everything I've seen even if it's not something I'm not necessarily into like the Zorro really excited for Zara around the Cat Loves Zorro sure Flash Gordon is amazing movie lash. Gordon. Professional Aunt Joan's which. One's the. Nineteen fifties style like. I don't know man this got a lot of the Phantom as the other one is the phantom there. They also do the mighty steeds which they have horses in Unicorn, huge massive elk and the UNICORNS and things like that. It's pretty crazy. Hair can right. So they're just kinda kiln on every level and A. Definitely check them out. So this is my last bit of news. They released the first mockup at that. So pretty cool. So Dan remember yeah, it's shot from Alex Very like Looks like show cha-cha. So I think that's awesome. because. I'm umbrella is great. If you haven't watched season too I, mean. I will give some retread at the ruined for people miserable retread. It's still pretty good. Definitely, van. retrievers in. Season one I mean there are some. Elements of Phil. replayed. In. Season two. A horrible but. I. Will Watch these two years why okay. I mean, it's still good and you should still watch it. Good we need to get more of it. I mean season two we need so much clouds and he's awesome in it. It's great. So, we want to to books. and. Will be spoilers doom number seven, do number seven, Doctor Doom doctor doom number seven. covers. Pretty Rad. Vintage doctor doom the we're raven getting a line on arm. saying pile dead bodies. It is written by Christopher Cantwell Artists's Salvador Arocca. And it gives a little bit of a back story that at various busy been taken over by some Korea and. Do. Kind of framed, and then he met him came the conqueror together. They fended off some carriers pursuing agents but can eventually betrayed doom. which came do does always like there's this huge event up on the moon where they were opening a black hole to try to fix global warming was called the. Our the. ANC on projects doing and like Dumas's completely against it because there's a lot of side effects and bad things. Openly, the other country well, what we found out by now is but believes the other country blew it up however, they use that look like. Rocket. So the world blamed him would make sense because after he's Bagai. All his loyals loyalists or like hit now. and. This Picks up right there nor that varia which is. Set Siberia kind of. Frozen Tundra horrible. is three vodka bottles sitting there and among the explodes then it shows. Wound the rifle and off-spinner second like you're so much better than just clerical duty Petra, and then like one of the other guys is like Hudson approaches from the south. explained to everybody as this is A. This is doomed. Loyalists Boris Kerala dooms longest-serving advisor. He's in a wheelchair on Patrick Corral doom chief of staff, and that's boras daughter. That she was talking, she's shooting larons last very monk of doom on. There's like a monk monetary worship like those of doom General Vasily Mucky of Doom Secretary of defense I'm Christopher narrowed. It's dooms adopted award He's long life let very enthrone. It was another orphan doom adopted right Zora who Kovic a cave Victoria's victorious dooms Cosmic Herald and champion Latvia And they're out in the woods just hanging out I guess they just on the run high now kind went from and there's like they see seven distance and I'll set in one of the most I've read comic books for all my life. Most. and. Re Entering Commerce House seven years old. and has very few times my life when I when I see. A. One one page one frame that I'm dislike holy. BLEEP. Dislike. That is one of these extent it's. frigging, doom. Gigantic bear. It is. Brilliant he's writing it. It's amazing like he's got a saddle and everything. Yeah. So the question I didn't read the reviews issue I, don't know when did you make the saddle? Where did the bear come from words? The bears name he is the very name and How they know how to fit a bear for a saddle as you cloudy Tame the bear there's so many questions that I have about the bear his it'll be no you being Boris the bear. Like. In Your Oldie. No Ukrainian days. Sure. Used to wrestle bears. Some had A. Yeah how knife his on one at all? They want even wear earrings feared. Yacht arrest them right apparently. So assembled book men his bear bear. Verifier shows bear fight. US. Mayor this is. And Death AMIC question is it's the middle of snow every Winter Weisenthal barrier. Wasn't hibernating could. Do it. Once Doesn't matter. Everybody's dislike what the heck is going on. In he rides up Like this is my comrade Novak see that he's Fed. He's like I'm going to rest and then there'll be a reckoning. Tax tells them to make his special armor. Then it flashes too space spaceship in there's Ducker Adam Brashear Aka the blue marvel he's a living anti reactor. Trying to shut down black hole Marilyn, he's got a special suit. He's GONNA fly in raising uses anti-matter powers to shut spike hold on Frank. So it's GonNa Flash between the two. If for the doom told before a doom, let's come back. After he got the ultimate off Ir. Our Oh yes. So doom does have. That, that was actually improve reserved for that, right? The he tells them the blue marble is the way to fix the problem. Course. Richard's doesn't listen to me. No, he doesn't all think he did it still right. So that's why. They're trying to see dooms theories actually right. So dooms like. I'm going to arrest procurement winter cloaks, tribunal mask, and It is kinda crazy. So the next scene is his tribunal mask and his winter roads, which is firs and longer green cloak and this crazy more demon with horns and teeth mascots way more intense. Oh, he's pretty hard. Korea. And he's like a few words the better trust Polish ruled has been shattered. And you six comprised innermost circle but even you must. Be Tested and loyalties question so then he's basically like I'M GONNA test all of you guys for your loyalties I things I'm GonNa test you. We're GONNA. See where everybody lies he's off he's like. He also has ulta no fire as neck like, oh us. Open all fire as. Intense which if you don't know, they'll no fires a pretty intense very. Powerful weapon in the Mari Evers. Point when they tried to use that and infinity war against Magus and. Quasar went flew out to turn us against imminent mega sample seniors took affirm. So then he had the infinity Gauntlet and they'll to fire and. That's the first time I remember seeing myself personally I think the first time I ever shows up is when we need a way to stop glasses and the fantastic four, basically hold him off with a gun. Manila comes from the Awad to the watcher. So we by proxy but yeah, I think about if you've never heard of it before and you've seen them black think the noisy cricket if a tiny looking gun but is crazy powerful samory a gun. Candidate does is being explosion was Crazy beam. Whatever was because she threw glacos where all of our normal weapons couldn't do anything term. So. Yeah. It's a weird. Eight to weird weapon. Noisy cricket. Not. So, he starts off with Petro, which is the daughter which achieve staff and he makes her. Neil. And, she swears her loyalty and he asked about her sick father and. He kind of is very. She's like she kneels and she's intially talks about he talks about her dad then he's like. Petra more demon than man and. And she doesn't really know what to say you can go but it doesn't make. That's the one. Those is very Then, he goes the monk and. The monk was like big doom wiped out whereas. He is just like I'm still here for you and the spread the word of doom. and. He speaks in like. Tibetan he's like what would say around here speaks Tibetan says, means hero so many the doesn't go farther than that. Dislike moves the next one, and then he goes to his his general. And he's just like I swear fealty rise and. About how he's been wounded in like for that Vario and that his life, sincerest, your name, and then. He doom rise up the ANTILLEAN attack the missiles compromise and their air defense shield also failed counterattack traders in our midst. Bring our security doom was like Mary do something. And it's a letter in its from his. His top general in its deers Katrina of no fence between our homes where we could be together again. Soon with ease along for simple cherry portion, you my love and so on and so on. It goes on like this quite poetic doom talking to the general. have, left the door open all you must do a step incites them remain embrace. And he's a letter minorities a love letter intercepted by my spies and. After the clean attack Illovo to written to Countess Katharina Kharkov, former monarch of some, Karya I'll give you two minute rank start and the Dude district's Holland by his I just books completely breaks eight. He's been cut as the traitor Gabe way the missile Kozo he starts running out Anne takes petras gun and doomed his lines. It's kind of weird really because doom comes out the door after however long the run and how grabs her rifle, but she standing there with a rifle. But he walks out because I mean. Dooms obviously like. A skilled killer. The guys because a couple of hundreds of yards off he could he could totally walk out of that hut and enough time to grab the gun and as I take his time ticket and And then he goes feed into my bare Amazon. MAZING. Yeah. So she didn't any tells them making the food for the bear. The Knicks Barry's got fallen like laid out of his mouth. It's crazy. Amazing. It's awesome. The next is a his oldest advisor in the garrison wheelchairs Petras Dad and he asked him am I love Boris he's like your love by countless because of fear and he goes to the whole like fear or slug on the stuff. Like this guy obviously. So you can talk to doom different laney's like even love yourself. I'm the living salvation human race, but as their love nets adulation. And he Goes you forgotten the victim dying in I cannot neil and so the guy is basic falls out of his wheelchair and then boom hand on his hand anything except fees exception asked. was pretty brutal, which is known like doom is. Very vain very much a jerk so. When. Flashes to Brasher in he's he's talking to Herbie, which is if he has done anything about the fantastic four. Cartoon back in the day s where her abuse kind of because he couldn't do torture line themselves on fires. Herbie's like their Jarvis. There Jarvis now which is cool that they breath it in. And he's in the suit trendy. Do this thing in there like He's trying to do is give me has. Never thought I'd say this can make jokes with this I got. And then it goes. To his adopted son and. He was saying all these things he's at Kristof, stop talking fees rise. But. Don't ever call me father again. Right talking to his adopted son, which is again this cold cold stuff. And and then then it goes Zora, dialing loyalty car master his Lordship in. He's like get up, get up Zora speak freely and she's like I'm very well, I'm not a slave. My parents were members of dooms children who died leaving something blue you I've led resistance forces in your name many times. She's talking all sudden. He's just a handful of fire and she's like Oh what and he's like no if I requires a focus mind to be used correctly. destroys user. My mind has not been very focused on entrusting you entire return, which is a pretty big deal. PREVI- Hours later shows doom flying obviously flyer. Suit Yeah. Awesome understood on and he flies to Liberia Castle Dome is nighttime and. It's Dmitri for tonight it's the. Guys takeover to be on the run of A. Place called Sim Kara. Some Kharian. Gas taken over that Berry and he's stadiums cancel and he's talking any like opens the doors using the ahead can opposite ends do like and he's like what can't sleep? Flies next to him and he's like stand up straight like a king because guys like Oh Liza scare. Yeah. She should be and he's like there's something missing. Yes. A truly delivering must have this like shows his face like dupes phases messed up. Ours Horrible GonNa where the car because I use better after secret empires something there's misinformation where the new scars came from the Yeah He's Pretty Jack up again. Why he's always been active as mass fixed during a secret empire after. Yeah. After nause. Could embarrass our battle planet. Hillary's regencies most recent secret wars afterwards, doom was punished by fixing his face and then for while he was a hero running around Ireland is in the infamous. BIZTV. As underneath. Completely healed somewhere he's gotten injured again or Navy unto to Himself I. Don't remember it doesn't matter ultimately he's messed up but it's It's. I don't know where it came from. So he has do knife he's father's use it and he's like. My father, he was chased by your family and frozen fields where he died clutching his arms that very pain bear pain do it makes us Face like. Up Yeah and the be God and God's through the heavens can fly. He throws him off the Castle Alaska. You're more pity and then all of a sudden like. The kids come out and. Say Sailor. Guys kids do that has got that got killed kids and they've cut their faces. We look we can be we can be your your follow can be the leaders and was like, no, no. No. I almost wonder if maybe supposed to be dooms, kids nerds a vision because it doesn't really go back to it. I'm not sure who they are actually. Faces aren't police other scars almost wonder if it's doom having A. PTSD. Moment is the way I took it. I think kids are really there but I as to who they are. Clearly, whatever they did is they themselves before but I'm not exactly sure who are. I think I think it's a vision. Sure. I think he's having some messed up sauce. These. Things of Broken Zoya that I look. But I don't know I. Think the left to be like an unknown thing like what the Heck Doom falls off and is like no no, no no this fall. so He's just like. Kids you'd be like. I don't think I don't think necessarily the president's can think they're dooms kids that how that makes any sense I don't know revision dooms kids maybe maybe. Like who's the mother? If he has kids I don't I don't know enough about doing I guess question. So. Then it's He stabilized the goes back to Blue what's his name pull? Marvel Marvel he's. Stabilized until expansion ceased his but it's not going away anytime soon like no not without more negative energy he's trapped. Her tapped out complication. Of course there is. When able to pass back across the event horizon so they're stuck here. Hold on who is then somebody came to him and he's like I'm Dr Honor Tedious I'm here to seal his whole i. The heck. Dock two and a nowhere, which is crazy cool. I mean I I liked some docker houses like. Yeah. It's pretty crazy talk shows of the Dan. Be It. The whole is crazy too. But yeah, as far as a thing. Doug Action of a Dan, is pretty as pretty interesting. Man I go to. Good four out of five like the story. That is really cool like I. Liked the crazy berating was amazing in like him making those people swear fealty like the. Megan the coldness of making his friend who's in the wheelchair is dying get on his knees and could barely move and then like the craziness of seeing a whether his real kids revisions, kids in their faces are messed up and I don't know it was really cool I'm curious see where it goes haven't been haven't read. This is my first time ever read Doctor Doom. So I don't know show what's going on. So he's Xm be wounded keep reading a drew me and I was okay. I've always kind of liked to do like you know he was never a full on villain. He's he's a, he's a different. He's rulership other people that he's in charter. So like being the King of various. So it's not just about him. It's about like his country's well right which we deal and he's like he's very intelligent like really like. You know you have doctor strange that the doctor doom when it comes to sorcery is not very many people that are. Almost almost equals the doctor strange when it comes to sorcery and also intelligence Richard. So this guy's like almost on par with doctor strange and Richards when it comes to intelligence like. Crazy stuff. He's he's a very, very powerful human being and so. You know and then keep basically has an iron man suit kinda thing. So. Just. There's a lot to he's a very complicated character is I've always really cool. So. Good book especially, just like a random obviously kickoff to another story ARC but This is a good time and you're curious about this become jump on do numbers seven. Yeah. I agree as far as like a story started makes sense there. They days ago right at page beginning at the paragraph taxed it gives you most pieces you need from what happened in the previous book so. It's a good catch up page. Be Score negative three, and a half arts. Great. The stories awesome. As soon as solid Sarah Mike this is the winner. Because it's just awesome. The bears only in like four panels made me but it's the way he's used in there in the way booms like here's when everybody is Awesome I. Have they give him a doom bear suit man Larry. Crazy doom fair like metal mask. Scary looking I mean for being a big obey Grizzly ads doom bear that can fly the Cape of flying doom bear. Mana. Stand. That's bad news radio. Except Doom, allow me and obviously except for dinner. Yeah. That's true. Man So funny it yeah. It's awesome. moved from there to the. Unkindness of Ravens. Her. an-and kindness Ravens, this is on the one from boom comics at number one. Because written by I dampened ocean and is drawn by. Marianna IGNACIA. And covers me there and covers so mean. A couple of choices to choose from there. as far as the book when opens up we first start out. in basically in library and we got a moderator or. Is it moderator now it's a narrator narrator you're monitoring you're supposed to handle the bates and infant. Fail horrible. Joke Protein. Stupid politics we could they like cattle pronged on my shut up. Just give you. For the Mike's. Control it all. Make so much more sense. Yeah. Politics are dumb. Anyway. So he started that we have a narrator and it's sad going over the different things that are stored in this library, and we want to be here that we're in the Abigail House is the Abby L. House. Library and it starts talking about The. Times the witch trials. And the moderator explains to us. Moderators. Narrator, Gosh. Mary explains to us that. Will which tries were pretty popular thing. Most people know about it right A bunch of occultist got caught and. Put It, out because cracks in witchcraft. Mostly women. But you go back farther in the books in the history, which library has a history of this town has a. History of all these events that happen during which trials. He's said the the books can give you the winds and aware but yet the between lines at the wise heavy foreign evacuate the accused that were punished. Didn't start out as accused. These are house the users. and. If you want to survive that kind of thing, you have to be smart as well as connected to others of your same means and knowledge. So basely book the opening here Outweighs Eight is a meteorologist fuel to put the death. But the death way the actual practice irs. And talks about how those survived or escaped move forward. Are the same ones that founded the country, the founder of his town founded everything. And then we move forward into the began the book with the story and opens up and we have this picture of long girl. Wearing red cat ears. And is on a missing flyer and says, I need as weatherly good last seen behind the Danforth high school. And It's because more tells you what she looks like what her? Description of the girl whatever. And she's missing. We switched the next panel and we have a girl looks exactly like her except with a bunch of freckles. Glasses stirring the picture with the boy standing Haidari says. That looks just like you and she's like, yeah, it's crazy I'm seeing it to. We come from there to Hauer. Day. started off normal. We get her inner monologue as she goes along and her day celebrate much normal for own brand new school and brand new city and place. And Got Hurt Her dad to school and she talked about how her Dad grew up in this town and so they moved back here because as I'm having problems at work, he's back and he's on heavy medication because of his injuries. The main injury came from when they were in a car wreck when she was a kid and her mother and her sister both died in a car wreck. So we get some pretty background of two of them. And? As we're getting the monologue from her. Dad tells her guy go back to hometown buffet phased up some other stuff and the town that has moved from. So he's dropping her off at school and he's an eater help taking her bike off the roof because he got up there but. Harry's back robot. So he needs her help getting it off. Has No problem dad? Anchoring, molecules says, she feels bad ads currently taking pills for his pain. We move forward from there and of course, she gets to school. She's walking through all these people on everyone in the schools like looking at. All crazy. And if it gets to the principal's office, the principal tells aware locker is an. Advisor that you know. Be New a new school you WanNa. Try to make friends volleyball ball. You know the whole speech about that. And they ever locker number number twenty three. And as she's walking down the hallway, trying to find him a twenty three years when she comes past the missing poster. And she turns a seat missing poster and that's when the whole scene happens from where he started. And she's like, wow, is freaking crazy and so she makes friends with this The first kitchen makes friends with a guy named Ansel ansel frame is the characters name. He's like, Oh, you're the new girl It's really crazy. Look a lot like the missing girl. Apparently girls missing for a few weeks now. and. But yet, they've already cleaned out a walker or moving forward. We even with her missing, which is Kinda. Weird a little bit. but he goes with her to Locker Sees Thakur twenty three's like Oh. Wow that was that was way released. Locker we released the girl has gone missing So she's the one that everyone thinks she is thinks she looks like. Her main characters, Wilma, surprising w names. Not only does she look like the other girl like their names and they're not the same? Both. W names so weird. Anyway. So she walks along the student walk along she has through Walker and he gets really alarmed initially because he's like Ali gave you the same locker even that's really crazy. Everyone's freaked out that she's gone. Answers. You opens up blocker and insiders glowing message in the back the locker and it says welcome crabs I me as after school near the Birch Trees Scott like a star and looks like go ahead in it and she's like is that normal and the boys like what do you mean? She's the message he's like what message Jesus bomb. Okay. Crabs I the city. So the town moved to crabs I The the next thing we have. The boy. Probably Watch out 'cause that scar scarlet dance force he's really GonNa have her eye on you. Her waverly refrains. WILMA's like who is that? He's like. Well, she's kind of like. The Popular Girl in school. Like, dance I like the high school he's like. Her great grandfather. Yes. Built High School so is a family town, lady and So, this falls that mean girls crowd of popular kids you know. Anyway. We'll about time we shot of scarlet in a couple of her friends and on the hall we shot up three other girls that are like the mean which girls he's didn't calm which you girls but he's like as we hate each other, the other ravens isn't her group. So Scarlett has her group of I. Know Your Charity Cheerleader Types in there's the ravens which are all a lot more punk rocking. Got An IPAD and why is a Mohawk and there's four of them. Whereas scarlet group seems only have three apparently. was part of both groups maybe. Anyway. So the school lunch, the school bell rings rubbing on class, and she's like, cruise dot. Sergio dot the class and inner branches like man what a weird thing is weird. And then we see the principal welcome in the hallway and we have a man a business suit and meets her she's like Donald, what are you doing here here? Donate another library wing he's like, no no, that was a new girl, right? He's pointing at Wilma she's like, yeah, you just you're stocking tease girls he's like, no no no I'm just real concerned about the missing girl and she is visiting for three weeks since the first time you come down here. Has Your daughter talked to the police shut and we see a couple of officers come walking up. She says, they're here all week Nathan asking everyone questions about the missing girl has your daughter talk to them. He's like all. You know the my daughter's at home that night and she talked to him once Sago maybe you'd like to talk the police dolled. He's like I. Know You know I got a place to be and he excuses himself from the situation kind of Uber Shady style. As we password from there to lunch, and now we're launching a wellness sitting with the ansel. And They're just going over like how the school was. Weird. Everyone keeps looking at her and she's feeling kind of freaked out by it and about that time we have scarlet inner fringe show up in lunchroom. He's like, Oh, now keep your head down to let him see Ya. And of course, they're there to walk up to her and I have a couple of. Football player Jock guys with them like stereotypical style. and. They walk up to film sitting at the table and of course. The girls like beaded tansel. He's like, Oh, I. Know What? I know I know when he gets a believes. So she jason chases him away from the table and she tells Wilma. Oh, we went to to meet US tonight outside the outside the Front of Building Your Fountain. You need to come meet US and she basically Tom that she have hang them mecum to. Become better friends. And she's like Yeah I don't you know I have to do is just like you're going to be there and he basically basically lunchroom her in her group or click. And so wilma lying while now you got two different cliques when my attention. And following that and still come back to the table just to be joined by the Ravens. And the Ravens Comfortable Mansell's get together and leave and she's like, no, you're fine. And loose themselves. So we have Yana Vicki is zoe and Zeta there the four different ravens. And they're like, you got a message right heavily talk and way that descends all one-sentence. What's coming from all four girls? So. One girl was like woolmer right? The next one says, did you get invite to meet up the third one says waverly locker and the fourth one says nod your head yes. So all one-sentence related with girls speaking separate. So KINDA CREEPY May leave. An answer like, wow, just wow both both sex after you were their little groups, he's like, what are you going to do and she's like? I don't know. About that time the bell rings from Classic Again, and launched the over. So they both head off their classes. And we fast, forward, to the school. And Hernias walking through the hallways ray leave and he's like heavy decide here yet and about the time one of the guys with the first group. Shows of in the hallways I think you're going the wrong direction. The answer like he's talking to you nerd. He basically tells how. Wilma Neka. She's going the right way to meet with Scarlett and her group. He's make sure she does he gives a little Hansie with A. ANSEL NANCY was getting heard. Well willman drops her hair bucks. makes big loud noise. Pose in his karate fighting hose. He's a all what are you going to do and she goes I see ten years of karate to pay off ever. Young. That's the what the dude says. so He's steadily like. Football jock stereotype jerk. Well, just that happens here comes scarlet and she's like Oh. No, you don't have to do that. If you want to walk around check other places, Archie can do that. You can do she wants. We'll be waiting for and in that whole group leaves and Wilma decides to go out to the woods to meet. The Ravens? Ansa falls are so they meet the girls and the he basically shooed away by the one with eye patch on. And we have another incident where they they talk talking kind of connects to each other. And she winds up one girls like so karate a-. Like nope. And they all stand looking to other from inches a hand. How'd you know that because the girls weren't in the hallway when she said it? And in the one with I patched lives, ripe patch seized glowing white crazy hiring fair and she's like I see everything and has all these sparkley like how no they're supposed to be firefly's or power or what exactly floating around all the girls. and. That's kind of where it wraps that. So. Yeah. I mean there's a lot of high school drama. We know it's about which is so how xactly Wilma's GonNa hit his category things. I've no idea I in the book is Pretty Fun read are at the beginning is pretty on a little gritty and like San many. Yeah. Very Samhani. The main stories were simple I mean. If good art is just it's his way where simple in the first three pages the first three pages are very like gritty in San. Antonio, like the internals the book I guess the main internals more like it's they're very like Andy. Kinda. Not Quite as anime is like trying to coax two major league schoolgirl neighbor along those lines gram. He's got he's got more I'm archie the newer archie stuff a little bit of. Yeah. Little more good though I like it a poppy I guess had that pop layer to I like i. like the art grant. Because it's clean and it works for this book for Sure Right. It's pretty interesting mystery I mean as far as the books concerned me, I can see a couple of avenues that might take as far as the thing, but I also like Nancy drew nonsense so. I mean on predisposed to that I mean score wise. I give it a three and a half. It was a preseason read is got an interesting mystery to it was a TV show. It'd be like sweet. Let's see the next episode and then the watching what they're told me I'm stupid. But. I did like it a lot. They they covers both the covers that we got in the store will remain. So I can, of course, they covered as necessary dictate the goodness of the book but realizes, pretty. Fun Little Read is coming out from film I don't. I don't remember if it's a miniseries or not. So I don't I don't remember that. But. Yeah I give it three and half thousand fund read. I'm interested to see the next piece to figure out how this. New. Girl. That looks exactly like the other girl fits into the world because it's crazy how close they look at each other. Yeah, give well like like a good book like like A. Weird like Fantasy. esque style like it's nate like it's a it's grow serious. Like serious like A. Teen drama but right but not like not when I say serious dramas. It's not. It's not cheesy like it's cool like it's got some like a it's a weight to it. Sure. Writings descends good. So I'm curious to see where it goes. macy's with like some India. Sometimes, they start real like this is really good kind of his out like they put allotted or to kind of like wide in rising to get this into a snow I a really puppies out. So like I hope that they can destroy stick with. Sure. So right it was like you said agreed with it's written pretty well and I three pages Manley set everything up the whole idea that like the flashbacks in that weird style. Is Very, it's very storybook Ryan when the whole thing posing his idea that the people that died at the witch trials. Were maybe necessarily the ones that bad and the ones that were bad became the ones causing the trials, which is kind of like, I. Don't it's brilliant really heating about that persecutor being beauty being persecuted. Pretty cool. Said say that's an interesting spin. Yeah. I doubt both the three and a half, right? Cool What about who? A different flavor and crazy with the JAEGERNA. So we got juggernaut number one limited series right Juggernaut Piper. Yes. fading is that right? I think. So Yeah Fabian Essays is the writer and. Ron Garni is artist and starts out with a little right on. The juggernaut himself. and Mr Jim Force of overwhelming power nothing can stop the juggernaut except himself another building walls and other building falls and other building falls Kim Marco's done reading of his pick up the pieces of the things he has destroyed. Starts. Out with? mencken. She's some sort of Navy Shield Asian or sore. I'm not quite sure what she's Asian of something not sure damage control who their PARV and they're like ready looks like as. Getting Ready to do this thing and no traces of nine realms and go ahead and our looks like he doesn't like being buried alive and then the building falls like. Climbs think you'd think wrong dislike he's a huge crazy that yours is probably looks awesome. Yeah. The two of them are there like monitoring the destruction, the building right and he says like, well, that went pretty easy Mrs Moglen He's a heated well, Cain and calmer ISO's Maria Maitland my sure. I don't feel like we've never actually seen her before, but the the group that part of his damage control damage control like they they I showed up in the marvel age annual number four. So I could nineteen, Eighty, eight ish. Aviator Eighty, nine, their own as serious for a little while. But these are the people that get hired to clean up the destruction. So then glide crime scene cleanup team same idea except for destroying buildings. And as far as the world concerned will marvel in DC old have a fair amount of damage property. Saddam's Dame's control the the people come afterwards the clean things up or to finish breaking them so they can be rebuilt. Their colleague Ashley Their own agencies. In the base there Hiram go breakdown these old abandoned buildings and like this season tons of money because he goes neck crush moves on as he comes out like some people start throwing Roxetta milic leave us alone like zone relieving. The, hang then all of a sudden somebody like wisdom for power. Like. Basic search slowing down kind of thing. He's like one the heck this is really strong accent Ovalles's like. Stopper things get worse and then I take off and. He's like one of those teen years have kinetic force powers and I need to figure it out. Either immunity and help him. Stacey muses like all of them live on the island of Crete talent. It's a peaceful place where the model are safe. and. He's like I know what it feels like to be powerless because he he's suppose a teenager and a him on. Magic which classes you little sister banishes him to Limbo Limbo and he's just a regular skin. Is a regular dude human ends, but he's got all the arms of sealanes is like. He's got any before now to figure it out and he knows how to get out of there and it's just him walking and walking and walking in the sacrifices and the sacrifices. Dragon his arm with him because it. Doesn't. Fit because he's huge these normal size guy and he goes back to Manhattan and he's like out looking for this kid and He, just he's talking to Kennedy doctor himself and like looking around has tutoring flashbacks lead the flashbacks is when he's in limbo his time about the time he was lawful alone he added. Yeah Jewish Current. Time we have saying he's he this Hanno I know how? It feels like to be powerlessness talk about when he's way magic banish him to lend bright. So Graham saying. He's in the s what he's. He's just normal ham, which is not like him because he's normally humanity. It's kind of weird to see like skinny version of this. Weird like. I know a homeless man look to him what was leading limbo for probably 'cause it's a i. think he walks for. He the song tells us how many steps. With like one bottle of beer next thing you know it just like forty, million, two, hundred, thousand, forty, two bottles of beer. or a billion bottles of beer you know. down. Because that's how he's passing the time to keep saying. But. As the flashes back to Manhattan when he's looking for this kid who's maybe mutant. And also like that, the person yells at him and search throwing rocks a thrown rock seriously for the record. This was my first choice like. Star to be in like aggressive. was just looking for my first as a not for showed. It's a a deceleration field. He slowdown kinetic motion. That's a new one for immune in because he trying to move in Camp you very. Out Chick pops out Anna, section of Newton but I am tired of your. Your S Walk in her front lawn and hit some with more not sit down. In A. And he just keeps commonly Why don't you stop? I? Don't know how and she's like trying to stop. She'd never dealt with anything like this before because he's pretty intense I won't quit until you leave us alone. And she stopped pleasing she over exerts power and falls and passes out, and then he falls as well and it takes a minute, but you can tell he. GETS UP I can't shake off. Like some budget stuff fell on the girl and he's like get your guys butts up. Get the stuff off her take. So then they take care to the hospital. and. He's talking to the dog and like what her real name is GonNa be alright and. The dockside free strips, it'll be. Okay. But if you're not, if you're not a relative you can go but he doesn't he just sits there Ryan she's asleep in asleep and he sits there until the next day and she's a assing hospital and he's like Bellevue and Damage joke wouldn't even spring for Mount Sinai and. Like you one heck of a hard, ass. I can help you get a crew co or immunes Levy. Now, she's like not immune he's like a Diesel, makes you sound like a battery because that's the name she's given herself as diesel yet DNA Dash Yell on Juggernaut makes you sound like a Again it's a cool name. I WANNA help you. You know I know what it's like. And then flashes back to limbo and he's made it to Crossroads crossroads. Saraya. Basically, he says thirty days trying to find you and he's been looking for this tree. Crossroads of how to get out of limbo and you gotta come there and Sacrifice. Something sacrifice something you love. And so he takes his helmet. He's like the rest of the job along the way but I kept the sacrifice. As Thad exist sounds is all I've ever had. That's mattered a night leave this year right and. He touches the tree and hangs it there and poof his out Yup. And so goes back to the hotel, the hospital room and they're chatting and she's basically he's telling the story of being limbo. She's like, I, don't get it. If you give up your arm, how do you still have his AAC? Different Armor Long Story speaking of which she's a short story science accident origins happened my pay. My friends posted the video of your fight on rocks tube. Channel. And he's like I wasn't a fight you gotta and gotTa rocks. Channel for Real. I got a million views videos of pranks we pull music pranks. Just, stuff like making elevator, take our to the first floor during the world women's or the women's World Cup parade I made the Confetti take five hours to fall. And he's really dumb say, Oh, you should talk but have you ever Damn says knocked down billions and get trapped block concrete for year. How many views get if you did something cool for my channel and he's like why I don't know big big was little guys sort of thing. That stuff is like Click Baker for people. That sounds like a lot like superheroes? I'm not one of those things like I'm not working demolition for damage control or. Like what I'm just working demolition for damage control besides why should I care? I. Don't even know your name. In. Sure. You do. It's diesel shaky Romaine, or an. Oem ever known since the day I got his powers because she doesn't remember anything. Is Go okay. I won't push. Say Good. We saw how that worked out already heard that workout out raise to check this out though and it's like A. Look at what one of the channel subscribers post last week show of like some prime damage needs insurance Picture of the hulk and his massive rage and it's a stop the whole donate to help victims of menace. He's a you're kidding ram and then as I she's not kidding. So just like the you know the next pages like. Joggers the whole which. Should be issue too well, which to say, no I went into. Jagger numbers the hulk. And The juggernaut is actually take the series lead versus the Hulk and battles past there's been times when the whole stop the juggernaut that the juggernaut wanted. The only thing that's ever almost killed all comes broke his neck. So as far as that goes. I went through like. Thirty or forty old issues cycle through stuff in the Gammon juggernaut light. He holds his own like he he more more more than holds his own he's like It's like. You know all levers frazier it's like heavyweight heavyweight but like the Hawk does not of people who put the down and can raise chill him out and one of those people for it's pretty intense. So and it's been a while actually since two thought Oh. Yeah. There's been a whole lot of things have happened the mean. Bag every from the whole the whole game they merged the therefore while he was savage. Yeah there's been a long time since though two characters actually cross paths. So I mean that's pretty cool. The said Bruiser Bruiser so Awesome. Yes go for that Book Josh. I liked it a lot. To four out of five as really impressed with it like I'm never been huge Juggernaut Fan. But this book like him more and I, you know I know that he's like. Are they take these villains and the kind of term, these anti heroes kind of thing I get it. And most of the time like hero Gan like. Making billons cool because they're not quite. Whatever Jergen. It's always been like. The bastard I, step stepbrother. Xavier interesting. Horrible stuff. So He's Roused the day while on a good guy because sometimes he's a really really big bad guy, right I just who I am and so. I I. Liked it was like four or five get like the art was decent. stories really really flows like a flashback or back and forth between him being in limbo like magic banshee and stuff. It's an Easter I liked it a lot so Yeah. I mean is really good. Mean Score. Wise. I like the way the heart works I like the way journalists with his current suit's really cool. story. Wise. It's a good story I. Mean We've had like redemption stories for him in the past I mean, there's whole timeline is run around that will the mutant the have a fish head before he died and my different path for them. Suzanne interesting way big way this fits in the current world with. The Cretan island in Lake how? Some people are let on an other people aren't, but for the most part, most mutants are loud. So like I like how that's going on as yeah. Give it three, seven, five. It's pretty good I. It was he was a good start for series and. Mini series. So that's cool. The juggernaut he doesn't get a lot of play and he really really see a little more because he's kind of awesome. Diet. An old magic Jim thing I mean. That definitely part of his craxton life but yet, it's pretty cool. Three three, seven, five so I said. All right So you at the speed metal speed metal hero alright this and connects to the. Far, the dark nights metal series is one the one shots says issue number one course 'cause it's one shot and if you involve Michelle, at all we we talked a little bit about what was happening death metal. How the Crazy Evil Batman, world and. This particular story of course, speed metal is about flashes because you know speed. this guy written by Joshua Williamson and the argument is by Eddy Barrows. and. I mean on both of them are awesome. Williamson's great writer guys. Also, he's been right in the flash of. Last like two to three years he's great and Barrows. Did it get artists thrown? Anyhow. So the story I opens up and we're looking at a watch. And we see kid flash while he. West. Kid. Flash. Falling through the speed force the back of the watch we see that there's a inscription scratched into it. This is every second is a gift. and. This whole time we have his monologue going on and it's it's wally west. Inner Monologue thing at the time when he first got to watch from burying remembers getting. What it meant to him and The we start seeing him emerge out of the speed force and we're getting flashback. When Wally West got pulled back into reality by Barry Allen and it shows the second where he remembers fading away and. Then, shows were very remember imposing realities like how ever forget you. So it's a flashback going over. Recent history. and. How? While he's had different different problems with the speed force and different things that have. resulted in him. Escaping debrief of reality, which is what Fleischmann caused. We jump to the next page and we see a giant document happened in his hand holding out over a different chunks of reality and Manhattan merging into these universe has had a major effect on y West, life I mean this particular batch of what's happening is all the reemergence into the world him I rejoined the Teen Titans and them getting memories back of him and then fighting. Oh presto. The. Magician. Bagai. It's Abracadabra the Golden and silver age villain these fight idol on all the time we have a magician guy, right? Yeah. I can't remember his name. He's different with most of the rogues gallery guys because he doesn't fight with anybody. Else's a massive ego. Heights. Anyway. So they were fighting him and then When Barry and wally came to blows over wally wanting to use the speed force to try to bring his family back. From reality. I if you didn't know at one point. While, he was married and had kids. Eventually, Bury Allen came back from the dead through the speed force and we moved forward with both flashes being the flash, and then when speed are when the whole flashpoint thing happened. Law West end exist anymore and subsequently his family didn't exist anymore. So. That led to bad stories where Wally A-. Mazel questionable choices during story called heroes and crisis which. resulted him being in? Superhero Gel. And eventually recruited to try a reset their world and fix part of the problems. my a force outside rally in a judge. and Atlanta series called flash forward. Which we get some shots of him with his kids during flash forward and He was trying to redeem himself and reset the world or whatever costs it took and eventually that leads to him. Being partially merged with document Manhattan powers. And flying around in the MOEBIUS chair. So. All that breaking crazy advisers had a real interesting path of life for last year and a half. her marriage the next page, and we have a giant chateaux bag las head and he talks about how to that WHO Interacted with him. And the baby laughs giving me so much power to make reality bend may be impossible possible. And he talked about human having the chair stolen from him the movies chair stolen from him and left him abandon again. So boys had a lot of. Guys that earlier he said. A lot of crazy stuff happened to him over the last two years. But then eventually lead the beginning of the. Death Metal Series where Wonder woman puts down that he laughs. Four minute. And from there while he was freed. And able to rejoining friends wonder woman basically save them and like re released him from way was traps. as in course, eventually, the labs turns into the. Crazy demon speed bat so much worse darker. Something even worse. Moldy wars ending and That's kind of where we're from there and we jumped from the overview catching everyone up. To the giant ad he laughs demon thing in the background and Berry. William J. All running from and berries in the front says the F. O. J. keep going and as a running, we wind up seeing they're being chased by the dark entity himself. And there's a whole lot of cool dialogue between trying to figure out what they're GONNA do. What decisions the try to make while he tries to spread the speed force and that doesn't work. Varies like we just gotTa. Keep running perpetual as medium to strong. He's too dangerous. I mean that's basically true. I mean it's really crazy. Anyway as a running, eventually all of a sudden kid Flash Wallis West. Appears, on the side he's like, Oh my God found you guys I've been running around everywhere looking for the titans and now here you guys are this is awesome. I thought I was the only one left. So. He joins them running. Now there's four of them, Ryan. And I. As as before is needed to keep time out the speed for filming around them because they're all using it so much pushing the speed force to its breaking point. And I know where we hear a bunch of booms and we basically wanted to having a bunch of dark flashes that in recruited from all the different realities by the bad boom tube and into the situation chasing them. So now the speed force is being pushed even harder because we have all these crazy funded black lantern are not lanterns black suited flash of death washes. And of course, at one girl garage and one's a Batman and. It's crazy. How even faces her in their their other reality flashes there is evil and so now they're really gaining on them and rabid Jay and Jay's arms starts burning. Berry. Goes back and pulls them forward a little bit and then wally slowdowns is drive away from from the to Jane Berry. And we wind up seeing A. Flash that was a joker as Dr Clash, which is also crazy. And it is causally Tatyana way laughing high in the line for you Ali Maher. And so as a running wally tells him. He's got an idea. He hasn't the clear and We really coke otherwise face with lightning is. Any says the speed equation. Basically stops time around them. For a few minutes. And makes. It makes everything around them stop and so all four of them get to have a break for a second. See The bat and the nights, the nights, the other death lashes still coming, but the spin quesions made them so fast that rally around slowdown. So it hasn't actually stopped reality it slowed everything down because they are moving so quick. With the speed force and speed quesion added together. Jesse in yeah from. From Jesse Quick Ima- and Max. Way traveled, who's a securities lesion? Is it different way to tune into the speed force which like? It, it works the same way. But then when you combine the too much comes coming up like it actually it's double kind of impact on the right and it makes Berries Suber has Kept running. Now, what you've done, we're GONNA believe you have leaving less time because. This is gonNA. COME UP A lot. In this timeframe because right now what we have going on which like if you don't know like. After the silver age heroes and I say silvery, Cheerios is in your Jordan Ziggy lanner, you know. He took over for Scott. Got Barry Allen who is? The flash like you're more modern flash but HE'S A silver age because he took over for. You know. Anna. You have all these all these kinds of examples because I could Delaware deepen have, but I won't but these specifically. That you had. People who took over for them. Who became fan favorites in their own right? and. Then got thrown back in the mix with everything, and so then you you get wally west while I was kid flash. and. We use the apprentice to bury that he was. He was kid flash using titans us. You Know Berry died. While was the flash for a long long long time. Yeah bef- like Barry was gone for ever I think. Continuity. Wise. Like actual like real life. Wise like Oh years. Years Maybe. Here's longtime Berry Amazon around. and. Dared. He when he was a he was. A way different. Flash, this book goes way into. Wally was. Varies. Like was a cop right use his straight edge. Hardcore. Guy He just didn't have US straight four fisted. Will he was? This? Is How it is. We run do this in the salad is and while he was like Hit a sense of humor. You know like he was just more is he was different but he was. He was ultimately wally it goes into this. In this book we'll get to. But he saves. He saves things more barrier dead and this kind of with with. Kyle. Rayner verse, Hal Jordan and I feel like walling Kyle became really really good friends. Kyle went on to do miraculous amazing things for the unanimous core there on such a higher level than anything. How did But Yet You know. then. There's such a better version of what right it's. It's definitely personal choice but like Kyle wally were like really closely intertwined because. You know they were. They were both picking up these mantles of these great master amazing heroes and they took it on when. There's nobody else to pick this up and they did it and like wally you know like you know Berry says it multiple times issues while he was always faster than him like while it was the fastest of the flashes speed is yeah. Yeah, and so it's just like I. Know It's interesting the way that go into that and stuff and like what wally truly is in. Given, do after the like the like fifty to happen. Characters talked about that multiple times like this captures went away right and being spoke is eye catching up how things had happened, which is really neat because they do say they do some things later on. Go ahead, I'll bring him up later on because is a couple of. Visual scenes they're doing some throwback stuff of a thousand rats. Sure. We always whenever Varies initially remanded for using the speed equation because it's only. Speed force that much weaker he's like we needed to break. We needed time to figure out what we're doing. And at that point, we see the where they've stopped happens of east central city right next to the. Flash. Museum. Anyway, we invite them being there to help fix the problem and tells them. Now I've been through there. Multiple Times has with Dow Wallace says I've gone through their multiple times or maybe I can find something giving them. I could find and Jay's like all right kid and we'll we'll go inside they. We'll take care of it. Every says the other will do just fine. and. At that point we wanted to having Telling them. They're saying he really feel it. Now they're breaking through the speed barrier. I am feel my power draining already. And J. A J grabs the two of them. He's like you always aren't gonNA fight anymore like when I having the flashes fight were stopped that he's a takes volley in burien basically stops Boethun from getting angry each other, which is where they're at and they dragged him inside the speed. The Flash Museum, and he tells Berry, he's still fill the mobis chair and he knows if he can get to figure out a way to fix this. Get the MOEBIUS chair. He figured out a way to stop what's happening and he believes trying to keep him from that he's the back who has tried to use it and he could the Cherry Jacob but now the negative. the negative speed force. Like the native whatever for for horse inside of. So wally whenever he was existing outside reality, he has a different version on. The power inside of him because he's from the other reality. And with that now, the bad has had himself changed into his demon entity. He believes it the battle. They'll use a chair in the next time around and even though the Cherif initially cast him out if he's able to get access to share will that'll be then the game there's no way they stopped after that. So. He believes in here. Again, I'll give him the answer he needs to fix the problem. and. As they're all talking like berries like how we can't do that. We are moving forward. We I came forward ashes only move forward right? The keep running. Any. Like they. They SORTA arguing again. He's like we're going to go with me I'll go by myself. And while he leaves Will only her second? Because Jay Garrick GEHRIG's like. How do things we we had to go with him. If we're going to go, we have the with him. We can't. It's one for all all for one. Basically laid tells him and as their spin his defile him, win the memory things come up. No before the memory things like wally says. Utah me like. We run towards danger right away. Right and that's that's when he turns around leave. That's what that's what the things. Yeah. We always flashes always keep running. You taught me to run towards danger not away from it. Right drilling nats when he leaves and that's and so. was inside the museum like there's all these pictures wreckage like Devon statues and the pictures of them when they're young and a picture bar and a picture of. Max And As in there like Barry comes up behind was like, yeah you maybe I wasn't. You know I I should be I should listen chill more like he's basically trying to apologize for his attitude while he's like you do know the While you're gone I I see the world a lot. Like I've always been your shadow I've saved the multi-diverse more. You'll ever know more than anybody has right. and. So they have a cool coming to light Mike. For the two of it's really it's really your flash. Family. Story. Awesome. Anyway at that point, a flash, the bag laughs is again the demon that and the. The two of them decide to work together they're going to try to get the MOBIS chair whatever it takes to get there to try to stop the problem. Is they decide to work together in about that time we get these crazy buzz and speed force. And all their costumes change around them saver. And get all kind of hardcore metal like chains in leather jackets and he laid the battleaxe trying for his lay trenching reality around is again he's trying chain all of us. and Jay's like. Well, I guess we better go on them they hit the road and so they all get ready set in as a speed equation wears off they take off. Like Lightning and they're like, you know this time when I can run away run towards them so they've changed their direction they're running towards the lowest share towards the Legion of. Evil flashes which completely catches them by surprise. Because what the Baddie labs with the demon that is expecting Is Not that mark and as a running through their girl told me I don't ever Stop Ryan never stop and they're just shredding through these flashes like. They. Totally turn the idea on top of them. Granted there is a legion of them. There's so many of is it's crazy and that's like, what are you guys doing? What is what is this and he realizes they're going after to chair. So other that point. Just chasing him. He didn't he didn't think about them back for it. And as the course they run through the different bats. Now that's against the different flashes. Eventually, he's like pharmacy a fight to to to that, and we see them Colpon a gaggle of Robin's Little Crow Robbins. And they burst through them and just leave them all flying all over the place. Pretty crazy. And we have a clay face that man jay punt that vary punch out. As they're fighting him while he's like harmful behind guys, I can't that's cheaper actual. James J J. J's. I can't Hiba Boys. I'M GONNA have to keep these guys off your tail. It keep going don't come back from this time I'm GONNA fight I'm GonNA fight him off and haul them. and. He stops turns around now he's surrounded by Zebo flashes he's like. Well the time we guys see good fight. I always taught my Ted Grant. He's like raised our box, which if you don't grants like A. Wildcat. Isn't it? Wow. Okay. From the Justice Society and he's like apprised like a prize box. It's like one actually one person that Batman actually trained without a fight. Yep He's the trade by box. So training grants a pretty big deal if you don't know is now you know. Nine Tampa Bell. Anyway after that leads to a wallace. I gotta go back is I can't leave day by himself he's run out to. Can't keep up guys. So I'M GONNA GO BACK GONNA go back for Jay sadly leaves the two we have volume berry running and. As a tear through more Mortga Russo. Crows and are causing gained on the two of us are talking varies like you know you always fashion the me I should have I? Shouldn't boys made you my shadow I should let you in front. Now let that happen Allah, mice bdu and he basically gets behind him and like pushes all his speed horsepower into Ali. Made him just that much faster. Berry falls behind because of it, but he sends him for with all his power. It was like the ultimate highlander endgame moment when Connor is always stuff to. To knock into Dunkin he has they. I'm going to give it a huge take me, and then he will get war powers combined organizers like thor. From actually. It is we have seen as it happens. We want of seeing while he's costume change from the crazy blue back to the red back to the normal red regular flash suit and he says he will get cool monologue for him like internal monologue where he's like I've been thinking about what scares me And I'm not GonNa do that anymore I think about what makes me happy and so we see shots of his wife we saw his son when she saw his kid flash next to bury. We saw of Iris we she saw of the his two kids being born in. We get a shot again of the back of the watch and the back of watching it has an ingrained on says every seconds a gift he's like her. From Berry. So we're right back to where we were at the very beginning the store wing opened up the watch. Is Make It, and next thing you know he's in a room with movies chair he says down on he's like a bat he tried to hard and he gives them a good bath that tries to her tries to hard and he's talking trash trim. He wants to get round up and he sits down cherries like to slow and he gives them like the the. Rock and roll horns. The here, it'd be caboo and the batches like sitting there kind of laughing, which makes me wonder what you know. What that's about but the the boom. We have wally falling through the speed force basically, and he's like half feels like an amount lost before when I was here I was lost. And as he shoots other side were in this completely white area with the Moebius chair and all the rest speedsters are there and his wife and kids Max Mercury. All. Of them were there quick. Yeah. This is cool. Life whole reunion even. There as well. Impulse. And that. So he his wife for second he talked to the kids for second impulses Guided him there because he's like he's figured it out yet found impulse figured out how to get them all. Out of reality into this little pocket to keep them safe from the bat. So the whole reason the kids are there and the whole reason irises there. Is Because of impulse like figuring out how to get them from the future. So we kind of have this kiss backwards loophole thing right? which is knee. So Moi's look into charity easily decide. I have running and he's like you're gonNA. Go again dad he's like, yeah. Well they will I they talk about their like. So you know like, can we just stay here and you know he'll come here eventually but like now the world together were not afraid anymore because we know we have a place that we can come on the word that we're always going to be here in the world going to be safe, and now that we're all together or really is going be really hard to beat us right. They telephone on. Sunday hassle. You've again and he tells them all the only be ready. Any also, we also get his wife being like I. Heard that you had a new blue suit and I was really excited to see the senator neat and then the kids. Because they're all being all romantic in. She and like yeah, again, I was excited to see it and he's like. Somebody likes the blow. Right. We wanted to have J. Thome. We'll be we'll be ready whenever you need us. We'll be ready. I feel feeling felt and we see the change from the classic. Flash. Back to the busey touches the chairs during transform back. So, he's back to being a blue flash and. Ebay tells them to be ready in calls them. And then I the three of an three them Jay. Anna while and while they all run off. To the next stage of the venture with the Modi's share flying behind them because they have to go because. You know a kid can't we stay here like no. Because a battle battling find us. In. America but also. Just. Because raw failing, we gotta go help the Justice League Jesse's families will right he lines out that it's not just us it's a family. If the desolate to and they need our help. And so they tells us the next part continues issue for of metal speed are a death metal. All these. Sidewalks have been happening. Between, add except for the ones that are origin stories, of course, the yeah. Like the ending of the stories freaking great Mike it's it's it's awesome As far as the score man I, remember Max Mercury I think he's awesome. All seen those characters like it's crazy maximum show and hardly anything. I don't know man. It's it's. It's really good. My Guy. Score wise I two to five thrilling go there. Mike the story it's so like. I don't know that whole family dynamic for them and lay the whole. Conversation between Barry and wally is really awesome and like never came back from the dead. Wrong bear on just fine. Right. But I remember being the storing guys you're very funny bag is going to be awesome and I'm like, how old are you? Right never read Barry Allen store I feel the same way he says as owner and I've talked about this on this show like a thousand times that I am a wally west Flash Guy. That's my jam. Sure he is my favorite flashy always will be dislike. Cairo's always be my favorite retainer dislike just like Tim. Drake. Will always be my robin gets just me that's who I am. My choices that I made sure know I'm I'm Tim Drake. Van Like I feel like but you know that's my thing is like when the new fifty two came around all three characters. All kind of took back seats. You know some less than others and some more than others but like. You know. Wally West to me is my flash. Like. He did the entire Geoff Johns entire flash run is all wally west and people forget. Like the flash wasn't that popular before Jeff, John's took over right. In that book he Geoff Johns created properly created and established the roads no through. All that stuff like. One of those stories that people attribute to 'cause. They're suits for the same and without seeing her hair, you could easily not know which was you forget that while you'd all that? It was crisis on infinite earths, which is like eighty. Eight Gosh I remember I'll look right now. but like man, it's one of those things like. I think it's I always. Liked. This better old thing is like I like their first album, the best they're all the first down. There I wasn't there heads because they recorded in a basement in his sounds terrible. This is you know like it's good because his nostalgic, but it doesn't mean it's better rhyme. Like. I. Love One thousand, thirty, nine smooth L. sloppy hours or third and smooth but it's not a better album than dookie. I'm sorry it's not because like Green Bay music you know what I mean it's just like duke is a better album through through start to finish because the songwriting because the producing because of like you know all your. Holiday Coleen. Thing is, is like, yeah, very alums a good flash don't, me wrong. But. While West like I feel like really modernizing may the flash great and I, and I think that like. The writers in this making it. They're trying to show that that conversation between the fans. The show at this book finally is being covered talked about because they haven't really. The kind kinda have in the flash books a little bit talked about it but like they're going up, you can kind of Opie here. This kind of thing but like they've never does really been hashed it out because always an adult now. He's gone through. It does age again with this whole batch of stories when he first comes back out of the speed force. Teen. Titans Age. He's not the adult anymore and all that passes, but he still has a little members of. Just like, but he's at that point been in adult. He's been. He has kids his wife life. He has things and it's just like embarked buried is still looks it was like this kid that like what this whole the whole conversation down about that's what I think is right about it. They're finally hash that stuff out that hasn't been hashed out right for a long long time since Barry back right on very valuable them how their place in the world as far as characters. But thing always drove me nuts is the people don't get that. TV show the the actor for the TV show grant. He plays a great very how he really does. But the show was mixture of wally west and Barry Allen together and we have walsum the show which is fine but wallace is the funny one. He's on the jokes he's he's the McCain he's the. He's a humorous heavy lucky barry on like you said earlier, he is the hard nosed cop and it's not the do can be funny. But the one that rather, Batman tells a joke to wonder woman's like how you doing lady is not Barry Allen. West and that's like you know because Oh crisis in Earth was eighty five right and so when did he return? Oh Our that up to. Like, but the thing is even even the comparison of you know Chiron how Jordan, like a Lotta people didn't really like Cow Rainer I. But then people really really really liked him and then how? Joran evil and crazy and every whatever but you don't like. Chiron just same thing how Jordan was the the straight laced the the. Test pilots like top gun guide like this. This guy's hero. This is man in Cairo an to use as like a lover. He's a kid he cared about you know lost girlfriend draft, the bat he. Hit are right now he just loves he wanted to create and just wanted to be he loved. He loved the beauty of the world the universe in A. Totally, different people decide exists like wally and barrier totally different people lay and so. As thrown style things I I feel like the. The weird shift between the two of maybe the costumes were the same. Maybe it would have been easier for people in in Chatham him by the feeling a lot of people when they connect the two things, they don't see the difference. And that's fine. I mean is what is whatever I mean. As. Far as either one of them are bad the out where wally falls is a different kind of thing, and so I I do like that piece in here, I really liked the. The humanity the rest of it is really pretty cool and like I feel like we're not like job as flashed off. In like his file regular flashes you. Having last month I think. So we'll see the new team does with it but as far like a writer like the new the he was really good I can. He's he's not a kid that grew comic you both actually no due to went to college with this guy. O.`Neil. and. Williamson went to school younger up the other. So like he was a complicated they his life too. So that's freaking awesome. By as far as like a shepherd writing. Yeah. I. Feel like he's always been great in this particular issue a really has a lot of hearts. Awesome. Josh, do you have a score of that book while you're still looking nonsense? I get it four and a half I feel like the part his big of a book is this was. Was In wasn't as big as it could have been. I get. It was good. It was just don't like. Looming. Way I like the story a lot I like the crazy. Just All of it, there's there's a lot to throw in bargain air that was read Mike. There's Latino thrown all all the speedsters everything. Yeah I. WanNa take off from it but if five from his big, but this one, this is a really really good book The one thing that was doc about earlier was like there was sense wally is come back on two thousand eight actually is very own maters return. In, corporal for him, he made it like a spear return earlier than that and I guess zero hours zero something share them anyway the. Since Walis come back his the difference of his suit as he has his red hair flowing out of the top of the of the mask. Depending version. Yeah there's there's been the way he wears it right now have the top but even when his red suit his resume was he was more red and silver and then had the red haired come out the top at I mean when he is in the flash books? SO FLASH FORWARD Silver Tone. You've got the silver tone but his hair is out of the top. It's not yeah it's not like the full skullcap. Yeah. The mo-modern suffering cures crisis and from flash forward. Yeah. Has Mixed since he's been since he's been back he's got. A An adult version of his kid flash suit almost as. A So. But in this one, he's got the regular flash costume on one points harder mask rips off. So half of it's the regular flash mass in half is also says Kinda show him like transition of things yet I thought that was Kevin eat like throw in there. They did that was cool. We all every is running in it starts tearing off them average Dr Valya Oh yeah. Visually the book stunning Ma'am I it's great. A lot of weird like little nuances like our. Cool. So you know I if it was up to me after all said and done, I, mean. If the good guys win, we'll see how it goes. The same for. Maybe deal just decides like this is how we're GONNA, end it but a has hospitals a lot of the doors and chain the chain of shut and who us wins, but anyway could be renew. Yeah nobody knows but you know like if they go back to his costume. I would hope that they I would define with you know you Barry Allen is like the the red and gold red and the yellow and then berries is just Herbert Wall is the same costumes, but it's red and silver sure enters is a lot more silver accent like you'd be able to tell the difference between the two of them. Did it that way but I think the skullcap is necessary. I think the haircut at the top really bothers me a dozen yet again like that it makes it doesn't make some kid flash can knowing to me because I think I think Weiser's respected how national full like flat To because he almost like lengthwise. Almost from you figure eighty six to. Twenty two years I think twenty four years like. I don't own silver debuted, but he almost carried just as long. Now for like almost thirty years, you carry that thing they both are. Barons first appears I. WE could look it up right now, but they're probably pretty equal I. think while he west carried the cow the flash almost just as long probably and I feel like he deserved to carry that like. The throw the silver accents in one in the Golden, the other, and they can tell the difference in Mike. You know we'll see what I'm yet multiple different robbins like why can't you have mobile different flashes like I I think the hairs can stupid. I know they're doing it because while he's like blatantly a red headed, it's always been kind of his thing and. He's a little more quick to anger is also like has more personalities is more like he's just a funny. He's funny. He's Funnier but yeah, me has at fiery UNICEF to him that sure. Guess we'll see if we wanted to have some point lanny of Flash series that is. The both of them or is to separate fly series is I mean I? Don't. Know that's going to happen or not. But it'd be kind of cool to see. You. Two. Different flashes in the same book as alternating who's in charge of the what's happening in the book you know. Me For while we to Batmans the night wing was Batman. Banking back from the dead and who we told the difference being the suits as the one had a headlight style Batman logo and the other one had the moral and logo. So you know that whole that interruption series move forward for while Bruce running around doing stuff has Batman also, so we could see it I mean he thought impossible or you leaving blue but making the whole skullcap out don't care. With blue cover. I don't know if they do that and I'll be kind of see. Here's the weird whatever. I do I really like wally. Jam. Flash so school to see him like making a mate a big lake. That's it's. It's all about him right now. In crisis man here is in crisis. Great. He gets pretty dark towards in. But. Yeah. He's had a lot of stuff going on but all in real rough life from you. Here's a crisis. He's the main fixture of a flash forties a main fix. So, we've had these books happening separate from regular flash series that have been while he was flavored. So if it's not like, you have been lack redoing things. This is a lot of it. That's. Been I mean kind of bad because he kind of Basil, for second? But any back to being good again that's fine I wasn't like wasn't my Super Villain Bat and he's turned his back from from not existing. It's not any it's Any worse how data's paradox? Ask. Appoint in every weekend is hot school man the deal it's fine now because we figure out why he did it. snowmobile. I know. They're all back from the dead. That's the point. If they weren't back from the dead, we'd still be mad at him and says of Kyle I don't disagree I like college colleges fine too. So verio. Anyway and and given the ultimate power which HAL and. Kyle. Both had kyle chose to relinquish it to save things and how didn't so shows again, how didn't have the ultimate power? He can't. Under in an added extra to it, the I on power is very different. Chose to relinquish it in save everything instead and he could older than. Things the God that's true and that's part of why he now has come out how had like the pair lex as saint goes to a god and that same thing it's pretty close not simmering. Now. The same thing and kyle unlikely to becoming after having conversations superman. Yeah again. Okay. Perfect. Perfect sample goes back to superman man. He's like he's the moral compass of the DC. Universe As it makes so great. I don't dislike him either so. That's why students favorite. Okay. Man He's a as I really soups. Cup of coffee out take you to smallville. That went kind of. He's GonNa Smallville. Coffee pancakes. I don't doubt that she cried. US. Market I'm sure she probably makes delicious pancakes. Bacon had no doubt. Again. Would you learn day Josh? Always it always experience who's question. I have an idea early on the show and then I, forget about it. Sober. Billion Bottle Beers. Bottles of beer on the wall to get to. Crossroads of. Anything, it is yeah. Since pretty good. as what I learned the judge. Great next great paying. Hey, that's true that just happened like two seconds ago. I don't doubt it at all. So delicious. Greet I know that you don't like serfs for food make you like the best butter process was fantastic. PSU like the butter. Check out this freshly churned butter from these. That I made myself was washy being long enough that crying tearing the. Reason out donald percent. You cry. Good pancakes you cry over your pancakes Nancy. True. My employees it's fantastic. Plenty of butter. Awesome. Getting books the Las Josh. Well am interested in Metal stuff is going on because. He goes. Crazy. It's been good at doom book was fantastic. I don't usually say the books that we covered but. There are some good on tonight. US. Picks. Couple of weeks in Roman few weeks show now and it's been like Dang good job is all head perform sure and now he's got a shadow soggy man like he just fantastic step This judge bunch I said Lhasa JJ has appointed couple new books come out. special missions, and then Like the. Encyclopedia. Kinda. Like A. Guidebook. But. They also surpassed returning in the actual regular series like full-on or something as we'll see where that goes now is legit also sure. as far as the book suggestion why that say we'll families killjoys getting another on. Yeah, it's going to be if I part mini. nope. Sorry. Six miniseries. The. Full title is fabulous killjoys National Anthem. So I, Kinda like this from the cover images we've seen these are little more like with a character join video. So I have a feeling that this is below more like. kind of I thought the first has been so I think that's really cool. A Gerard Damien. Surprising dude's pretty writer. D Way does. over watch the video games getting a five part miniseries and the CAL pictures for it during the previews. Catalog look. Awesome. said he that'll be cool. It's tracer Last last artists are tracer London calling as the title so. If you a overwatch fan should be cool bachelor books royal. And then there's one coming out from image. This is another any I called homesick. and. There's some previews in last month's catalog for lake preview pages. And the Best I get from the preview pages is that had. Our main character is trapped in house it turns into a MEK. and. Then wanders around the world doing things I guess. The right. They tell us they did. They say it's like power rangers meets the shining and part of it does look like crazy dark magic and just crazy. So i. think that's really cool. Arm I'm interested to see what winds up being because initially when we have the dialogue going on, it's all these prisoners. It sounds like a trapped in wherever they're trapped and we see this crazy team should have a window of a house in Ulsan the house transforms up into like macaroni Bod. It's awesome. The way looks so interested in that thing I think that'll be cool. another book that I wanted to shout. Is the. which we talked about last few episodes. Craig rate and we did one review on the we we only find them when they're dead if actually drop in next week. Time. Wise. It hasn't help you with a show cause who when you're listening but as a thing if in third praying for number one, third prints came out while this week again, time doesn't help. But if you have not seen I think I'll ewing. It is free in great Awesome. So. That's awesome. The I, think the other ones will be good other books around now they're really good thors crazy good in deceiver frequent popular. Is, getting print after print after print so That's wild. So you dig of all cases right in and his next book for Image Crossover. Still Superstars on so that it comes out next month and thank. And don't forget. The. Laurie. Is Less than thirty days away as true as of today. So, Laurie to be great to on this comes out I mean this less than thirty days. Science and as a good thing for everyone which it is. I mean if you don't like the Mandate Laurean. Either haven't washed it. Or? You might be a tricky to Suharto. Commie. Commun- I'd say communist trek humanity to like Star Wars. Set True I don't think that's true for sure like real ones. Makes it all in like a real one uses the? Wasn't my idea man I mean I. Guess That's probably true. Proper ones. Like Chairman Mao is no it wasn't my idea terrible. Sure. A proper commie not dislike. Oh, can ask. please. Now I got I mean I'm sure those people like it. If they get the, they don't tedious, Fran True. sesame is Josh window twenty, four on Instagram wfan delete to four We are also add action figure deconstruction on social media platforms. We're behind on that my life's been insane and it's on me. CBS Even though he is part is the harder part. Though I'm working like sixty hours a week. So I've been having a hard time getting time to for us to film and not look like I am raccoon. also, we have the never been done podcast, which is. S in Mayes podcast, which is a little bit more laid back and we put less. I won't say effort into it just like. It's just a little bit. More ridiculous and more trainer Account Ozzy trainer. It's this more because you. Know out of Santa last week is pretty fun like we need to good ones. The MELLBERG's episode I think is fantastic. You know it's just going to pick and choose like directors and actors in his at that but also it's just it's if you're listening to with if you listen to this one knee your kids. Stop that one more rated. R.. Saddam to it with. Your kids unless you don't care what my sister does not care so she will listen to. very different kind of show and also art is at Taco. Comics. CVS. On instagram it was true and Tom COM PODCAST DOT COM has links to everything that we do true Including our friends is a hot saucer ratio is called SCOVILLE. Right. So you like hot sauce check that out of other youtube show usually like five minutes longer pretty easy does like dislike actually the instructions only usually ten twelve minutes on average pretty easy in their Action figure once. Basically boxing figure. So check it out. We got today from joy toy, which I showed you which is really really cool. Jet Amazon exclusive that we have to do I haven't opened it special because it's like. It's just been been crazy so we're trying to. These are little little bit easier because we can figure out on Wednesday night kind of thing but. Like it's And you've been raised or by yourself kind. Which is a lot on your shoulders. Well. So do this because we love it and we just hang out books and these are good ones I would say if there's a book you guys are interested in and you want to hear about it, you're not able to get it or something shoot as a message on the. SOCIALS CVS will get back to you. We'll see if we can get to it male tried to you can leave comments on the Potter Matic site though every episode has a. Leave a common if you will have a comment or. Is it a pot, AMAC DOT COM backslash comments podcast to believe. So if you just googling. Go Top. KOMO'S PODCAST DOT COM is the link. There's A. There but he's an instagram comment and CBS get back to you. He also dominance on facebook page for. Thought Comic. Comic Talk. Coming up top five comics. Comic Talk I think is what it is. I should remember that you can find us on facebook as well on topic podcast maybe, and I don't remember. You. Can find a store says easier. It's fine top comics which store from store even find the podcast as well. So you get new stickers for the packers. For the extra figure construction yes but for. Now. We some soon. Sure. Don't have all of us. So. Yeah. So so and you got a new colour comics are. True, the a couple needs to if you're shopping area announcing new stickers. Yeah. Because I guess they're coal, the Hologram owns like am I gonNa say what it is with the parade. Yourself. So good go by the shop. CBS. Even if you can't pick up a book, pay a buck or two for sticker. and to say, yeah, give them a air. Hi Fi because code. US With such. An air if five with you. Too. Key. John.

US Ravens Marvel John Volley Boris Kerala principal Rad Tom Again Yoyo WanNa Vassar Josh Petra broncos Richard Disney Mary advisor
Billie and Gay

10 Things That Scare Me

10:19 min | 1 year ago

Billie and Gay

"Aw Man Okay. That's good. Sorry this is my low time baby. Four o'clock is coffee time but I don't I don't I'm not going to drink coffee number one. I'm afraid of falling out of the sky. The number to the unkindness of others and the unkindness in myself. I do tend to be harsh verbally. And it's alienating to people around me mostly the people I'm very close to along siblings my wife Cetera as I get older my rough edges and my sharp points are more pronounced. I would've imagined it to go the other way. But that isn't he's not three. I fear that I won't create anything substantial four going back to sleep. I guess the first big sleep leap in my life. Is this a little background. I was addicted to drugs for the first minute since my adolescence until I was thirty. Two and I had a friend who got sober. I took her to Howard University Hospital. I lived in Washington. DC and. I watched her from across town for a few months. And she sobered up so I asked to be taken off the Methadone I stopped taking. IV Heroin and so it was monkey see monkey do really aw five. I'm afraid of tyrannical rule. It scares me and angers me all all at once six feeling powerless and having no voice. Aw I literally did not speak for about a year when I was eighteen I just felt I had nothing to say nothing to contribute. I have had dreams as a younger person that I was in a horrible situation. Something scary scary frightening terrible and I would open my mouth to scream. Nothing comes out of the. Voiceless also was being assaulted by men when I was young so I while I don't have a fear of men I have a fear of not standing up and speaking up number seven. I'm afraid of goat cheese and raw garlic number eight and I've thought about dying since I was a little child late at night. Yes yes I've always been involved in death in in one way or another. Our mother died when we were very young. So there was that I started reading. We know bitchy worries at an early age. Always looking for people my age. Who has passed away? How old were they and what did they die from? But I think gets like little silent prayer inside that just always somehow. It's their like I count calories all day long so I got that from from my mother. And it's like a silent little prayer one hundred three hundred seven hundred calories number nine. I'm afraid of missing the people I love and if there is perception after death if there is longing if there is emotion hideout that there is but that makes me sadder then an actually lightsout number ten. I'm afraid I can't protect my dog. Adequately my name is Billy Parker and these are ten things that scare me Risque this gay. Hi honey roll. I've written six things down. Do you think that's enough number. One skiing that is sliding downhill number two tripping which I do number three children when I'm around the youngest grandchild that have who is almost five and I don't think I'm so great with little children whereas billy my wife and he just thinks that she hung on and she is a lot of fun and she knows how to do certain things that it would never occur to me to do number four people much more accomplished than I number five men more than women number six. I'm a photographer and I photographed people. One of the things that I have always thought that I should do as a photographer was getting the car. and go out on my own and photograph the graph and I have always been afraid to do it and I don't know exactly why I know that if I were to go out and do this I would. Why get not all of it though? Some of the aloneness would be difficult for me and I know that's what keeps me from doing. It must be what might be called the biggest fear I have scene number seven teenagers especially teenage boys had an older brother. He was pretty powerful very popular. Feeler everything and I felt like nothing was overweight. You know never obese. But I always felt. That wasn't pretty what billy and I have together. Well I the first thing I can think of to tell you is that I was sixty nine years old before we got together. And she's the first person person who effort Beautiful number eight being dependent number nine getting Alexander and number ten losing my memory and my mind. My name is gay block and these are ten things that scare me Billy Parker a wife. Sister friend activist writer retired corporate video producer and presently an addiction recovery teacher at Santa. Fa County jail. She lives with her wife. Gay Block and Santa Fe. New Mexico gave his portrait photographer. whose work is collected by many museums museums including the Museum of Modern Art? The ten things team includes a barrel Daniel. He met Odell Reuben. Sarah Sandbox Emily Bo teen and Polish human music and sound designed by Isaac Jones. You know what scares me. We slow drains. What are you scared off? Tell us at ten things. PODCASTS DOT Org.

Billy Parker Isaac Jones Washington Daniel Santa Fe Methadone Howard University Hospital Heroin Museum of Modern Art Emily Bo Alexander New Mexico Fa County Odell Reuben Santa writer producer one hundred three hundred seve sixty nine years
BFD: Lent Day 18: Saturday after the Second Sunday in Lent In the House of Annas.

The Bellarmine Forum Podcast

04:23 min | 1 year ago

BFD: Lent Day 18: Saturday after the Second Sunday in Lent In the House of Annas.

"Young Benjie profile. Luna's Christmas evacuee Fontham. You're listening to Father Richard Clarke. Sj's daily Catholic daily meditations for lent presented by the Bellman Forum. Let's pray name of the Father Son and the Holy Spirit on the sorrowful mother. Mary pray for us to obtain the spirit of humility confidence and persistency to make a good meditation on the passion of Our Lord. Today has lent day eighteen Saturday after the second Sunday in lent in the house of Annas listen to the words of the Gospel. According to Saint John The high priest therefore asked Jesus of his disciples and of his doctrine. Jesus answered him. I have spoken openly to the world. I have always taught in the synagogue and in the temple with all the Jews resort and in secret I have spoken nothing. Why ask if that me ask them who have heard what I said. Spoken under them. Behold they know what things I have said and when he had said these things one of the servants standing by gave Jesus a blow saying out of the high priest so Jesus answered him if I have spoken evil give testimony of the evil but if I well why strikes me Thou Aniston Inbound Kaya Face. The high priest number one. Try to picture the scene. Watch the person's listen to their words. Observe THEIR ACTIONS. Anna's bidder cynical. Old Man delighted to find his enemy. In his power the Pharisees crowding round and eager excitement the false witnesses trying to concoct a plausible story and in the midst. Jesus sorrowful bleeding exhausted yet. Calm and full of dignity here the insulting questions of Anna's. The derisive jeers of the Pharisees and the Shell to the mob the firm quiet gentle words of Jesus see the angry eager gestures of the enemies of Christ. The assumed indignation of the judge. The cruel blow struck by the mall mailed hand of the soldier on the face of Jesus causing the blow blood to flow from his sacred mouth number two Christ received this blow upon his face to atone for our sins of the tongue. For the wicked words the CENSORIOUS WORDS. The uncharitable words the impure words that are too often precede from our mouth grant. Oh Lord that remember be suffering this cruel blow and so may learn to hate my sins of the tongue that inflicted upon the number three our Lord desired. Teach US another lesson. That is to bear with patience and gentleness all outrage and unkindness all re pros all reproaches. Ill usage and especially such when we as we endure for his sake. Blessed are Ye. He says when men shall revile you and persecute you in speak all evil that against you on truly for my sake but we must take care to bear it for Christ's sake and for the love of him if we would earn the blessing Hail Mary full of Grace Delores with the blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of the womb. Jesus Holy Mary. Mother of God pray for us centers now and at the hour of our death on Mary. Mother of our Lord pray for us to have a desire to please your son our Lord. Jesus by our lent that we may rejoice with you in his resurrection at Easter and in the life to come on the Bellman form is a nonprofit public charity and this program is distributed for the Greater Glory of God Development Forum is supported by donations that are tax deductible details available in the website bellarmine forum dot Org.

Jesus Mary Bellman Forum Anna Richard Clarke Sj Luna US Grace Delores Saint John The
BUDDY- TAGALOG FICTION STORIES | MGA KWENTONG MULTO

Stories Philippines Podcast

06:57 min | 6 months ago

BUDDY- TAGALOG FICTION STORIES | MGA KWENTONG MULTO

"Task. Nevada. Last one. Bag Eight. Nine. Last one day. My last simple bugs Lombardo Basil again tomorrow. Lasted Union. Vince our financials were called part of being Yin. Yang suggests machine NASA fifty thought that we have been. At the among the minority by Magana It was a very good workout Netanyahu's Latin target with now in Palestinization I donate you. Money Langella Nolan Salama Guber cuts are no pain. No Gain Jim Hottest Skeleton Orders Smelling Garcia Mc Sarah Jim LSD Sung except from Saturday Neto but sung by San empower. Some sort can t shirt shorts Lumumba Chesa they're dispenser Sung the hugging Jim. And Plastic et Cetera for whining to deny NASA dispenser. Too Big a winner successor for and plastic eighteen up on your sebastian around the Scandinavian. Seraing Jim in twosies all body weight name now. Whole on DEEPA Caserne. The. Meaty belong to windy. Is Sign aretha young gas gases went back by Watsa Jim some per God's own now one eight, hundred young bitten by Ottaway mcghie Magee downtown on the one major Zito got banana guava. But I'm want to see you go down at random. The PUNTA GSA Bloomberg in and Jim Gone Not. Allow her. Elite national. Dummy boggled to Moba Stand Jim who made up Sherzer magazine I mean now boasts door noma by building. At wash s a man ricky suspended mean Potok. NAPA. Mama. Will last a fine young budging bicycle at. My Lab netjets. Who Young expect my saying say. Navigate ten on Jim, work? After eight months of continuous cut finally achieved magnon resort town niceness at one word, it can young PAGO. Among to Stop Duncan along Jim. No pain. No gain. So basement Deng Jim Goldensohn narrow among barking don't share the marriage you don't see her MOTORCITY blue. It'd been a bilingual CHESA happy being. Tomorrow twomentwox anion pile, and May Joma dilemna. Blogging Union. Down be good. Luck. Ma, I participate Sonya. Not, highly sedillo on the. Larry. Melvin. McClellan young allowing tomorrow. Or someone. South by South Mommy so Holloway Don Cannon Matanitu Subba Milana, arena doom. Honest. Era Blood ending here up, I had the Marina Donna sober study now more or less and. Would not will be. Richard. NEPAD. Now, illegal being. At. The. Alana Goblins. blest. So. They can marry. Him. But they. Own Allowing. Multibillion. bowo knowing we saw Jim. Melvin the one. One Nasdaq with. In. In the when? He got the toll but the. At. The Martha how? Can you to. Buy Gobind. Matab was sounds I. Sat being A. Picnic sinuses HR number one Sahadi to sell. Bones inductions in little. But I now who died sale? Cyborg more how you? Bitten. Dealer, alanine Delina. Illuminate on. Meaning A. Bungalow. Guessing a nine painel among now may market assigning melanie the Buckeye. Baresi Win Sinai National Pinky. Buttoned Underpin. Alien. Cabrera Nagging Mattaya NUNCA. Again. City not only be some among the LAGA. Big Not Bowel now. told. Momma Ghulam. May Go anish. So Body Nagging Workshop parasailing boy sat up nearby in basically. BE UNKINDNESS IB Richard. Shannon and anemic lamb dioxide ballots way superman muggy DONNA CELEBRITY NAPA by Tomatino. Begin. Naples not on cost. So he turned on are better hold the hunger. I O Sean but I Meka Guinan Jim Body so Bali but relations in Lebanon parasailing way. Some Ya sooner day SANA is manner in Wayne ongoing young began. A. Go Khalil Amy, my story and Nice. Monari Lemon Samoa. Salmon facebook page. STOLI'S PHILLY been spy. Guests. Because I E made. Stories. Be Age by guest. Jamile DOT COM. Mounted Marlin neon adding description. And done similarly. Miami Cinema Manar Story.

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What does kindness mean to you?

No Really, I’m Fine

13:19 min | 11 months ago

What does kindness mean to you?

"Today's episode is a special Alyssa. I suppose I'm friends have all took part in this episode to answer questions on kindness and hope specifically what kindness means to them and this because this week is mental health awareness week on the famous kindness so on the newer any. I'm fine podcast today. Against look a kindness. How he can be more kind switcher? Kindness MEANS TO US. Kindness tested in and out of my life. Sometimes it's welcomed the often caution clouds emotion because of childhood trauma trust a Hughes and accounted review of acceptance about a hard time with kindness. But the truth is kindness and never laughed. My ability kind overs has always been. Kindness from office has been president equal measure. I just have to learn how to accept it now to find in. We are all capable of kindness. Sometimes being kind to ourselves is the hardest Pars for me. Kindness a smile. It's how it's hoke learnt might be of actual at the moment asked what it is for me. Receiving mental illness diagnosis isn't the hardest part. It's why we welcome commit for all its quacks which is most difficult task. Saranda be kind of his most important me. Be Kind self lockdown on my own. All I hate for his the I see the light and I carry on my own. I find mechanisms to fill content with myself with my own company. I'm just to just to be okay just tonight. It's GonNa be high who do live on my own. I'm not alone. I just hiked the more I'm doing not by China's myself if some days all I wanted to is Selma Safer. Mock Djaama's do nothing. Then that's okay. Hold I WANNA do is watch reruns my favorite. Tv PROGRAMS THE NOT SO K. To just need needed to come to terms with painter k with doing nothing kindness means to. May just being that for one another showing somebody that you read car and that you really love them enough to be for them just checking down again saying hello. Even if it's a strange that you were an impact on your daily exercise just smart enough to me. Kindness there were full. Things like everyone to join this week canal is encourage and become reach out because even at this moody difficult time. It's really important for us. All to keep connecting with each other sending messages texting is you can do to keep reaching out and speaking to family friends. Whoever it might be it might be a someone in your life that you haven't seen for a while and this is actually the perfect opportunity to reach out to them and then feel special and it won't make a special nine that you've done that the second one is listen if we're reaching out let's listen back. Let's listen to each other a bit more. Find out what's going on in each other's lives and such a powerful thing when we can listen to others and have them this to us. The third one is coverage wherever possible. That's joining coach each other. Whether you're starting a new project or you've got a new job or at the moment just because life is a bit of for struggle we just need to get through each day. Empowerment encouragement can be so so vital for us. The LAS WANNA be kind. Be kind to each other such an integral part of what we do even current time. It's so important to just continue to be kind to each other and deal the things about beach out. Listen encourage these all party kind. It's amazing thing to be kind. This scientific is proven that fuel kind to someone. Then it makes your oxidation was going up in your day and it makes you feel good today so pleased today if you can you feel like it when you fill up to reach out this encourage and always always be kind? There are so many beautiful things that I am hoping to come out of this global pandemic the first being that. I'm hoping you appreciate the smallest things things like a whole cup of coffee on the morning and the womb sunrise on my face. Hope to watch more sunsets and reflect upon my D- whether that be goes oh I hope that this teaches us a valuable lesson in that even on your worst is there was always somebody worse off the new. I hope that it teaches us. Not only to be kind ourselves but to be kind each other. I'm give myself more recognition for daily tasks that on some days I couldn't even thing about. I also wish to stop. Compare my life to those around me. Not all flowers bloom at the same time and just because my story is different. It doesn't really matter. I can't wait to celebrate my smallest victories and treat myself when I want to. Life can change in an instant and I truly believe we should be proud of who we all I'm Jamie Yates. This is my message. Pope unkindness fulltime single parents. Six year old child and a six month. Old catcher in lockdown feeling the strain grateful to have this unexpected extended period to really be farther to monitor rather than part-time holiday. Daddy a role which had never have chosen for myself parents. Please try to cherish this time. When the Notre Indian Sane? Maybe tease him. Some common sense practical skills turns threat to China. Please schoolteacher and give yourselves a break. This is tough of any response is definitely getting to me. It's an hour. Look back what they best. Famo- it'll go in terms of any heights. I have during this strange difficult time. I hold out hope that society as a whole can learn some lessons may be about being good citizens being kind to one another reviving old values like decency common courtesy shaking off the demand culture which seems to become the gnome people. These days kind of inherently anti doing is they're told sometimes in detriment and certainly to the detriment of those around them. As very me me time I think in recent years a time like this. So surreal and some impressive. Dented is surely an ideal opportunity to take a step back. Breathe a move forward with a little more empathy and respect each other intensive myself and condemn to me horrible to myself about. He told majority she's only say. Tell me off on a do it and she is doing. That is Embarrassing Talk to them when they get down on themselves so you you try and come out with all the cliches but for her to be pointing out to forty wrote me. I shouldn't be so mean to myself and so hard on myself in Mesa makes you think it's a bit was smack in the face which are really. It's kind of a default thing. I said very very high standards impossible wants to keep to as a parent and as a person in general you know if not worrying about whether have been fun enough for craven off for encouraging enough during the day to my door thinking down. Then I'm thinking oh well. I should've spent more time playing with the cat in because you know she. She deserves attention as well and I should have got some exercise. My should have should have that stuff. Pointless on that was great. Additional advice to others will just kindness means to me. I'm from a mental health perspective in my experience the kindness of any means. Something has been people who I've learned to trust. Listen not necessarily offer an answers a told you so's if things don't go right. People don't want to solve everything people who you know just being there without judging you and people who when you're not in touch them maybe for a while and out of the blue we get in touch with them. You know you don't have to spend too much apologize. Evan spoken for a while. I'm lucky some of those people in my life and to accept help to to even seek a strong core of three or four people. At least two who are no of? I call them kind of my guardian angels. There's demands from them them tain amazing stories incredible kindness and sacrifice and bravery am not just from the heroes of the. Nhs's everyday people montage. And I've been working our neighbor's dog and little things like that times like this. They bring out the best in the good people. And if you someone who's spent any time thinking about maybe you could do more. You probably already do more than enough. And that is kindness fence for listening the best kindness to myself looking forward and not back allowing my so for lack of judgment but I would allow this to me kindness to is listening knowing you other if necessary unkindness from overseas to me is loyalty small gestures on space. When I need we all Nikon around us to feel calm we all need to be kind to oversee contours are only six letters. Just two words powerful motion that worldwide should be heard bringing people together looking after each other's minds. If you do one thing today then please just be kind is just so important to help your friends out. Listen their feelings and support a mental health. We shout to your family safe strangers to you just never know what they were neat if you make someone smile and virtual hugs all the way. The Tania's of ax could buy a day. Shoe acts of China all without judgments agreed with an open heart to all those who nate even on yourself sometimes it takes. His toll should try to look after your mind body and soul. We all come together. These difficult times despite mental health awareness and just be kind

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Londoners Tap For Charity, Repeat

The Good News Podcast

05:04 min | 1 year ago

Londoners Tap For Charity, Repeat

"Hi I'm calling your host of the good news podcast and I'm neil the other host the good news podcast is your source for Good News News Fun Stories Auditory Delight and Sonic Joy. We're bringing all of this goodness to you from the cards against humanity studios in Chicago Colleen can and I share with you something that I never feel good about. Yes when I'm asked by anyone on the street for money. I always apologize and say that I don't carry cash rush. It's not a lie just never ever need cash anymore and I never carry it but I still feel bad about pretty much every single time I I have that same experience. I never carry cash with all that in mind. I love this next piece of good news. The city of London is installing thirty thirty five terminals for a not for profit company called Kaplan and with plans colleen to roll out up to ninety of these these terminals will allow people people to use contactless payment methods to donate to charities helping the homeless in London. The money from these payments will be split between twenty to charities that are all trying to help people who are sleeping rough the plan is to cut homelessness in half by twenty twenty two and ended entirely by twenty twenty seven England Oakland and London are putting some serious money behind this initiative committing to a one point two billion pound investment in tackling all forms of homelessness listeners. It sure feels like they're trying to do their best for all the people of London with a project like this truly and it's my kind of project to because it's using technology in a new way and it's it's making it easier for us to be kind to each other. It's a win win. Have your cake and eat it to keep your cake. I'm GonNa have myself a little cobbler. sure yeah because it's England all have some pudding. Please spitball for me away that you imagine technology could help you be eh nicer. I'm trying to think about when I'm at my most meanest. You're you're going to one side of the spectrum trying to push it a little little bit the other way China. I'm trying to think of points during my day where I'm I'm the least friendliest to be around and seeing how technology can help help me be less terrible. It's interesting. It's just facilitating your own inner kindness yeah well. I feel like if my inner kindness is facilitated and that's going to ripple out to other people will be the change you want to see love it so one of the Times that I am at my most unkindness is towards the end of the day when and I haven't had enough to eat and I'm hungry so some people call that a handy and I can be a little short with people namely my poor husband so I think with that mind. It would be great to have some sort of reminder to have a snack or take a brass or maybe you take a walk. Maybe that's what I need. I think I need a gentle push and that gentle push cannot come from a person because then I'll just be mad at them so I think if it comes from some sort of piece of technology then I would be more apt to take it yeah I'm trying to think of. I think that's a great example I when when you said when am I my meanest. I immediately thought early morning anytime I have to wake up early. You're not a morning person. I think it it could be a morning person but I I guess it's like when you're half awake. I think I have said some really mean things to people well when I've liked just woken up and I'm like either walking to the kitchen or walking to the bathroom or like just walking out of the room. I'm sure have been like get out of my way. Just yelling mean things randomly just like it's like that. It's like that that two minutes. We're for your eyes are essentially still closed. Yeah and you're just trying to walk to the thing you need to do where you are officially saying yes. I'm awake whatever it is Israel like. Maybe it's brushing your teeth are getting a cup of water something in there that could be like even just a some kind of muzzle right talk to anyone until like peed or splash some water whatever it is to fully thanks for listening. Do you have good news awesome or maybe you WANNA. Tell us a joke or idea. That's amazing email efat good news at cards against humanity dot com or leave us a voicemail at seven seven three two one seven zero one five six you can also tweet us at the good news pod and and if you love the good news podcast reviews on items. We'd appreciate it most of our music. It's Paddington bear same place same time tomorrow.

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#136: Be Kind (to You) [MINI-PRACTICE]

On The Verge

12:19 min | 1 year ago

#136: Be Kind (to You) [MINI-PRACTICE]

"Welcome to another on the verge mini win practice. I am care. Bradley bringing view this short form practiced to hope you pause to help you slow down to help you. Connect in with your own bright light and intelligence so this many win practice. I'm going to ask you to have a seat. Enclosure enclosure is and relaxed in your chair or on your bed for a few moments in this practice. We're going to generate some loving kindness toward ourselves and others. This practices much needed. I know it. It has changed my life so encourage you to do this short practice today and to remember it throughout your day you to try it again tomorrow and then at some point it becomes more natural for you to just feel all day long so take your seat with your feet on the ground in your hands on your knees lengthen. Your spine finds you're not slouching forward. Enclosure is in this loving kindness practice. We're going to generate the feeling of gratitude and love toward ourselves and others. We're going to wish others and ourselves. Happiness enjoy safety in ease and by doing this in practice it helps to elevate our mood. It helps to generate and stimulate our body to produce the nerd transmitters in the hormones that make us feel happy and peaceful so bring your attention for a moment to your feet just bringing your attention to your feet helps you to shift attention from thoughts or your busy mind down into your body. Notice your feet notice your hands on your legs your seat on the chair spine now. Notice your breath tune in with the experience of breathing. Thank notice what it feels like in how to exile. Now we'll turn our attention to our loving kindness practice to generating feel good way of being offering wellbeing to others and ourselves. We'll do this by repeating some phrases. I'll give you the phrase and then you just repeated in your mind we start by turning our attention to someone. We love someone very close to us us who may be in need of some support. Bring that person's face to your your mind's eye bring the feeling of that person right into your heart. Repeat these phrases in your mind's eye after me. May you feel safe. May you be happy. May You have peace. May Be at ease. May you feel safe. May you be happy. May You have peace. May you be at ease. They just noticing the feeling of that love swell in your body as you offer this loved one is offering of happiness. Now turn your attention attention onto all living beings all sentient beings. Everyone in your Inner Circle Outer Circle Circle People. You don't even know animals plants wishing and all sentient beings sense of wellness and ease. May you feel safe. May you be happy. May You have peace. May you be at ease. Feel safe may be happy may you you have peace may be ease. We send this loving kindness out to all beings notice this feeling of fullness night in love fill your body fill your mind now. Finally we turn our attention towards ourselves offering bring ourselves this same sense of loving highness. We offered to our loved one into all sentient beings. Yeah so turning your attention towards yourself you can put a hand on your heart repeat and your minds I may I feel safe. May Be happy peace. May I be at ease. I feel safe me be happy me I have peace piece the IBM es me. I feel safe me. I be happy. May I have peace me. I be at ease notice the feeling fullness your heart in your body and in your mind offering ourselves does this loving kindness self compassion and be game changing. I reminding yourself your own depoist for yourself to have happiness ease of being feel peaceful and serene to feel safe in your life such an important reminder that we are love to offer ourselves the kind of love that we earned for that we offer others can start to soften a rigidity around our heart to help us relax a mind that is fixed. Carey this practice into the rest of your day offer others all day long. Your wish for their Happiness benefits just in your mind go. Spread is loving kindness. It will not only fill you up more but others will sense it as well. This is how we step by step moment by moment start to turn the wheel of suffering in our world towards happiness and love peace joy joy is in connection can open your eyes noticing. Listen if there's any shift in your sense of awareness in your mood thank yourself herself for taking this time short time to fill yourself into fuel yourself with loving unkindness. Thank you for joining me. I look forward to our next practice together. A Wonderful Day

Inner Circle Outer Circle Circ Carey Bradley IBM