8 Burst results for "Stephanie Means"
Available Worldwide
"stephanie means" Discussed on Available Worldwide
"Welcome to Available Worldwide, the podcast by, for, and about the accompanying partners of the U.S. Foreign Service. Hello and welcome to Available Worldwide. I'm Stephanie Anderson here today with Shumali Ray Ross. Thank you so much for being here, Shumali. Thank you so much for having me, Stephanie. So Shumali, first we're going to get started with some quickfire questions, but before we get into that, could you just tell us in a few words what you do? I am an international health and DEI expert. I'm also an intercultural life and leadership and health coach. I'm a speaker and I combine both of it to be a fusion health and development person. And I'm sure you're much, much more than that as well, but we'll get into that as we go. Okay, great. Where are you currently located and who do you live with? I'm currently located in Atlanta, Georgia, and I live with my awesome daughter. Okay. And I know you've been attached to the Foreign Service for many years, but what countries have you lived in around the world? So I have lived in Indonesia twice, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, while my husband was in Pakistan. So it was an unaccompanied post. I've lived in South Africa and the U.S. twice. We've been evacuated twice out of Indonesia, which is quite an experience. And my husband currently is in Ethiopia and I am in Atlanta, as I mentioned. What three words might your best friend use to describe you? I think my best friend would say I'm courageous, tenacious, and definitely a nurturer. And what would you say is your superpower? My superpower is that I am very inclusive and I like to make everyone feel like they belong. And then the last question, and I love that you chose this question, but how are you doing for real? So I chose this question because I like to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. And I think if you ask me today, I'm doing extremely well. But if you asked me yesterday, I'd say I wasn't doing that well. And I think that's just the virtue of being a human. So some days are good and some days are not so good, but I take the blessings and the gratitude of the good days. And I think I learned from the not so good days. So that's how I'm doing for real. So, Shimali, I know that you, as I mentioned before, have been attached to the Foreign Service for a number of years now. Do you know about how many years? Yeah, I actually calculated it because I knew you were going to ask me that question. So it's actually 19 years. 18 years. Wow. And now you have transitioned to the U.S., to Atlanta. How has that transition been for you? I actually think it's been the toughest transition for me. And I've been asked this question, why the toughest, since I've lived in seven countries. I think it's been the toughest because, one, it wasn't a transition that we planned on. It was an unexpected transition because it was because of a health reason that we had to make this transition. It's a transition because I am here without a school or a job or an embassy affiliation. I didn't know the A of Atlanta or the G of Georgia. So everything about it is new. And so I think the first year was very tough. We left our daughter here as an 18-year-old to go to undergrad and expected her to be an adult. And then when she became an adult, we expected her to become a child with me being her caretaker. So I think the first year was very tough, but I'm now pulling on all my sub-superpowers, which is the grit, the determination, the courage, and the resilience to learn to call Atlanta my home. You mentioned when you moved back to the U.S., when we were talking a little bit earlier, you mentioned that moving back to the U.S., your goal was to work again in public health and that you really met some challenges due to the years you spent overseas getting back into that career. Can you talk a little bit about that and how that's led to where you're at in your career now? Yeah, I think my journey being an EFM is no different from any other person's journey. I think my husband and I made a decision in our career. In fact, I was the primary person in our career. I joined USAID as a personal services contractor in the late 1990s. And it was a rare phenomena for the woman to be going and the husband to be joining and giving up their career with a 15-month-old baby. And I was well regarded by all the security guards who remembered us when my husband went back as the Foreign Service Officer. But, you know, it was after two evacuations, we decided that my husband would join the Foreign Service and take the exam and I would accompany. I don't like the trailing or the following because we all, you know, accompany our spouses or we become members of households. And with that comes, you know, sacrifices of reinventing ourselves or taking gaps in our careers or coming back to our home countries to take care of our parents or our significant, you know, others or our loved ones. And it gets very difficult in the work environment when we come back to our home countries to find work because it's difficult to explain those gaps. Plus, it's very difficult unless we are gung-ho career people to have continuity with the same organization. So if I had worked for the same organization from country to country, which is impossible and for most of us, I didn't have that relationship with that organization. So when I came back, I had, even though I had worked for Global Fund and WHO and the State Department, I just didn't have either the continuity of time frame or the continuity in country. I just, you know, what you saw on my resume is what you got. And even though I have two masters from Columbia and all the credentialing, it just didn't matter. And I was very fortunate to have all the interviews, but I just ended up feeling terrible, like most EFMs do when they come back is like, whatever we did was not good enough. And I could never pull on my lived experience of transitioning my family through seven countries and doing all the things we do. Whatever I did, I couldn't build on that lived experience and I just couldn't make it. And I think this is what the challenge that I went through, even with all my education. I grew up with multiple languages, including English. I just, and from Columbia, with one of the best schools, I just couldn't hack finding a job. And I got up one day at two o'clock in the morning and I just said to my husband, I said, you know, I can't do this anymore. And he said, can't this wait? And I was like, no, it can't. And I said, you know, I just can't do it. And he's like, I said, I'm going back to school because I said, where is a person? I said, actually a woman, but it, you know, I'm a gender person. I it's neutral for anybody. I said, where is a person's lived experiences taken into account? And I went back to school to become a coach because I felt that a person's lived experiences needs to be taken into account in the job market. And as EFMs, this is where we really need to advocate for our voices to be heard into the job. I'm still hoping to be that employer to take that voice into account. I am employed now to be able to have that voice heard. And I have got back into that space. And you were mentioning that you recently landed a consulting job and that you're approaching it with a coaching mindset. Yeah. Yeah. So you're able to blend what you learned from coaching into that consulting background. So I was very fortunate when I came to, you know, and it's a hard thing because I went to coach. So I went back to school and that was one of the things. So when I came back to the US, I think we always hear it's a doom and gloom story repatriating back to the US. And it isn't a doom and gloom story. It is a doom and gloom story. And it is a doom and gloom story. If you are. I didn't even know what this concept, Stephanie, means is foreign born. We are all foreign. I have friends of mine who are not foreign born, who feel they're foreign when they come back home. You know, some don't because they have homes and they come back all the time. But there are many who do not belong to Washington, D.C. or Virginia and landed back in Washington, D.C. and Virginia and feel that they are foreign back in the US after being living abroad most of their lives. So it doesn't mean because you're a person of color or you're something else. We all are. Many of us are foreign when we come back. But, you know, for me, for example, who was not born in the US and had lived abroad for nearly 20 years, you know, I came back right pre-COVID. It was freezing. My neighbors wouldn't talk to me. You know, I had two kids who were in my daughter had become a local student from Agnes Scott where she went to college. She didn't have a graduation. You know, my son had five months left of school to finish. I mean, it was a it was a nightmare on a many fronts. So my first job was to get my family situated. Then it was to focus on me. And I think one of the things I would tell people COVID or no COVID is you need to sit reflect. If it's a good experience, enjoy the experience. If for me it was like to just wallow in where I was, you know, just wallow in it, give yourself that space and the grace to say this is where I am. It's not the best situation because unless you give yourself that space and grace, how can you hold that space and grace for your family? You can't. And then just get on with it. And for me, I felt I had been at a positive 10 and now I was at a negative 10. You know, I was freezing. It was, you know, just like we were all together in this constricted space, dealing with everybody's constricted mindset, you know, and I sort of felt I had lost my purpose and I have never lived without purpose. I've been very fortunate to have a very strong role models, women role models and my mother who said to me, you know, you were born, you know, to make a difference and you were born to have a purpose and to feel suddenly I had lost my purpose was like I'd lost my radar. And I think that time to wallow and that time to have space and grace made me realize that actually my purpose had sort of fallen in that sort of space and that the thing that I have lost was actually was just buried. And once I discovered, rediscovered my purpose, I realized that the two things that make me most happy are to be of service and to learn. Well, Covid wasn't the best time to be of service. The only person I could be of service was to myself and to my family. But what I could do was to learn. And so I took a pause. I explored, I took the science of well-being, happiness, which was offered by Yale. I did a gender-based violence. I mean, that's my area along with public health from John Hopkins. I did both my certifications on health and on leadership and health and wellness. I did a transformative coaching course. I did a whole bunch of courses and sort of upgraded my skills. And the more I studied and the more I learned, the happier I felt. And so I focused sort of on my personal happiness and the happier I got, I sort of was able to hold more space for my family. It sounds like all that learning kind of re-inspired you and reinvigorated you as well. Like it's sort of that interesting chicken and egg thing where when you're not doing anything and you feel stuck and you are wallowing in it, it's hard to get out of that. And then when you do start moving forward, things really start sort of compounding in a good way. You know, it inspires you to make more changes and add more things to your plate, essentially. And I also, you know, we instituted little things like we had family dinners, everybody did their own thing. We had family dinners. You know, I tried to find other people in the foreign service community who we had been in Indonesia together, so we couldn't meet, but we could talk on the telephone. So we tried to find like a virtual community. I got onto Nextdoor. You know, I tried to find I got onto Sietar, which is this cultural, you know, I tried to find so my way of dealing with it was to create a virtual community because it was such a socially isolating period for everyone. But also, I knew that for me, community was so important. I couldn't go back to India. There was so much loss as well happening. And all you were hearing was negativity, that it was a way of maintaining positivity in one's life and networking. Sort of reconnecting with people I worked with in the past. And that's how I actually landed up getting my consultancy in Atlanta, because I reached out to a woman who I'd worked with in USAID many years ago, and she put me in touch with somebody at CARE. And there was nothing at that point. But nine months later, I got when I came to Atlanta, I had a message on my phone saying, are you interested in a consultancy with CARE? So it sounds like you really keep coming back to that idea of community and networking and finding other people. This might be an obvious question, but if there's other EFMs out there who are feeling really stuck and sort of stuck in the wallowing phase, do you have any advice for them apart from possibly finding a community? Any other steps that they might take to get themselves out of that stuck phase? So I think, you know, I mean, there are a few it depends a lot on your personality, right? I also recommend some people like to journal. I meditate a lot. Some people like to meditate. Some people like to pray. One of the things that I also recommend to people, you know, you don't have to be in this alone. It helps. I'm an ambivert. I used to be an extrovert. I'm not an extrovert. If you're an introvert, it's harder, you know, to reach out to people. But if you're at post, there are a lot of resources there. You don't have to. Nobody has to know that you're reaching out. But I always I have a clinical psychology background. Please reach out to some men if you need mental health support. There is no shame in asking for help. So please seek out any kind of support that you need. And there is so much support both at post and in the U.S. You don't have to do. Nobody has to do it alone. We were talking a little bit earlier, you and I were, about the practical advice and support that we sometimes don't get when we first become EFMs as it relates to our future careers and how those might evolve. And we were talking about clearances and non-competitive eligibility. Looking back at your career, are there any steps or things you would have done differently had you known about them in the past? I think the Department of State does a fabulous job in and I say this because I worked for USAID and for the Department of State. I worked for in Indonesia. I worked for the HR department on onboarding and I was the EFM point person. And so I know what a fabulous job the State Department does in preparing spouses who are coming out and first term officers, other officers. And these are the job opportunities. Please apply for them. And it's something that I wish USAID and other agencies would do more of and there would be more collaboration between the agencies. I've been now an EFM for 19 years and I wish I had known more or my agency, which is my husband's sponsoring agency USAID, had informed us more about non-competitive eligibility or what are the jobs that we could have applied for. I think if many of us would have known this, then when we came back to Washington, we would have had more opportunities for jobs. And as you advance in the number of years that you've been in the Foreign Service, you have that much more of an advantage when you come back to the U.S. to have access to jobs that you would normally not have. So I definitely recommend and it's my plea to EFM starting off, take advantage, whether you're with the Department of State or with other agencies such as USAID or CDC, please take advantage of the opportunities that are there. It may seem a job that doesn't match your qualifications. It doesn't matter because in the long term, when you come back and you will come back home and you will be looking for work, you will have so many more opportunities if you have put in the requirement number of years that will serve you well once you're back. And also, please go for your clearance because it took me 36 months to get my clearance and partly because I was foreign born as well. But once you have your clearance, it stays with you for the tenure of your time in the Foreign Service.
Available Worldwide
A highlight from Sumali Ray-Ross | Global Health & DEIA Expert, Coach & Speaker
"Welcome to Available Worldwide, the podcast by, for, and about the accompanying partners of the U .S. Foreign Service. Hello and welcome to Available Worldwide. I'm Stephanie Anderson here today with Shumali Ray Ross. Thank you so much for being here, Shumali. Thank you so much for having me, Stephanie. So Shumali, first we're going to get started with some quickfire questions, but before we get into that, could you just tell us in a few words what you do? I am an international health and DEI expert. I'm also an intercultural life and leadership and health coach. I'm a speaker and I combine both of it to be a fusion health and development person. And I'm sure you're much, much more than that as well, but we'll get into that as we go. Okay, great. Where are you currently located and who do you live with? I'm currently located in Atlanta, Georgia, and I live with my awesome daughter. Okay. And I know you've been attached to the Foreign Service for many years, but what countries have you lived in around the world? So I have lived in Indonesia twice, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, while my husband was in Pakistan. So it was an unaccompanied post. I've lived in South Africa and the U .S. twice. We've been evacuated twice out of Indonesia, which is quite an experience. And my husband currently is in Ethiopia and I am in Atlanta, as I mentioned. What three words might your best friend use to describe you? I think my best friend would say I'm courageous, tenacious, and definitely a nurturer. And what would you say is your superpower? My superpower is that I am very inclusive and I like to make everyone feel like they belong. And then the last question, and I love that you chose this question, but how are you doing for real? So I chose this question because I like to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. And I think if you ask me today, I'm doing extremely well. But if you asked me yesterday, I'd say I wasn't doing that well. And I think that's just the virtue of being a human. So some days are good and some days are not so good, but I take the blessings and the gratitude of the good days. And I think I learned from the not so good days. So that's how I'm doing for real. So, Shimali, I know that you, as I mentioned before, have been attached to the Foreign Service for a number of years now. Do you know about how many years? Yeah, I actually calculated it because I knew you were going to ask me that question. So it's actually 19 years. 18 years. Wow. And now you have transitioned to the U .S., to Atlanta. How has that transition been for you? I actually think it's been the toughest transition for me. And I've been asked this question, why the toughest, since I've lived in seven countries. I think it's been the toughest because, one, it wasn't a transition that we planned on. It was an unexpected transition because it was because of a health reason that we had to make this transition. It's a transition because I am here without a school or a job or an embassy affiliation. I didn't know the A of Atlanta or the G of Georgia. So everything about it is new. And so I think the first year was very tough. We left our daughter here as an 18 -year -old to go to undergrad and expected her to be an adult. And then when she became an adult, we expected her to become a child with me being her caretaker. So I think the first year was very tough, but I'm now pulling on all my sub -superpowers, which is the grit, the determination, the courage, and the resilience to learn to call Atlanta my home. You mentioned when you moved back to the U .S., when we were talking a little bit earlier, you mentioned that moving back to the U .S., your goal was to work again in public health and that you really met some challenges due to the years you spent overseas getting back into that career. Can you talk a little bit about that and how that's led to where you're at in your career now? Yeah, I think my journey being an EFM is no different from any other person's journey. I think my husband and I made a decision in our career. In fact, I was the primary person in our career. I joined USAID as a personal services contractor in the late 1990s. And it was a rare phenomena for the woman to be going and the husband to be joining and giving up their career with a 15 -month -old baby. And I was well regarded by all the security guards who remembered us when my husband went back as the Foreign Service Officer. But, you know, it was after two evacuations, we decided that my husband would join the Foreign Service and take the exam and I would accompany. I don't like the trailing or the following because we all, you know, accompany our spouses or we become members of households. And with that comes, you know, sacrifices of reinventing ourselves or taking gaps in our careers or coming back to our home countries to take care of our parents or our significant, you know, others or our loved ones. And it gets very difficult in the work environment when we come back to our home countries to find work because it's difficult to explain those gaps. Plus, it's very difficult unless we are gung -ho career people to have continuity with the same organization. So if I had worked for the same organization from country to country, which is impossible and for most of us, I didn't have that relationship with that organization. So when I came back, I had, even though I had worked for Global Fund and WHO and the State Department, I just didn't have either the continuity of time frame or the continuity in country. I just, you know, what you saw on my resume is what you got. And even though I have two masters from Columbia and all the credentialing, it just didn't matter. And I was very fortunate to have all the interviews, but I just ended up feeling terrible, like most EFMs do when they come back is like, whatever we did was not good enough. And I could never pull on my lived experience of transitioning my family through seven countries and doing all the things we do. Whatever I did, I couldn't build on that lived experience and I just couldn't make it. And I think this is what the challenge that I went through, even with all my education. I grew up with multiple languages, including English. I just, and from Columbia, with one of the best schools, I just couldn't hack finding a job. And I got up one day at two o 'clock in the morning and I just said to my husband, I said, you know, I can't do this anymore. And he said, can't this wait? And I was like, no, it can't. And I said, you know, I just can't do it. And he's like, I said, I'm going back to school because I said, where is a person? I said, actually a woman, but it, you know, I'm a gender person. I it's neutral for anybody. I said, where is a person's lived experiences taken into account? And I went back to school to become a coach because I felt that a person's lived experiences needs to be taken into account in the job market. And as EFMs, this is where we really need to advocate for our voices to be heard into the job. I'm still hoping to be that employer to take that voice into account. I am employed now to be able to have that voice heard. And I have got back into that space. And you were mentioning that you recently landed a consulting job and that you're approaching it with a coaching mindset. Yeah. Yeah. So you're able to blend what you learned from coaching into that consulting background. So I was very fortunate when I came to, you know, and it's a hard thing because I went to coach. So I went back to school and that was one of the things. So when I came back to the US, I think we always hear it's a doom and gloom story repatriating back to the US. And it isn't a doom and gloom story. It is a doom and gloom story. And it is a doom and gloom story. If you are. I didn't even know what this concept, Stephanie, means is foreign born. We are all foreign. I have friends of mine who are not foreign born, who feel they're foreign when they come back home. You know, some don't because they have homes and they come back all the time. But there are many who do not belong to Washington, D .C. or Virginia and landed back in Washington, D .C. and Virginia and feel that they are foreign back in the US after being living abroad most of their lives. So it doesn't mean because you're a person of color or you're something else. We all are. Many of us are foreign when we come back. But, you know, for me, for example, who was not born in the US and had lived abroad for nearly 20 years, you know, I came back right pre -COVID. It was freezing. My neighbors wouldn't talk to me. You know, I had two kids who were in my daughter had become a local student from Agnes Scott where she went to college. She didn't have a graduation. You know, my son had five months left of school to finish. I mean, it was a it was a nightmare on a many fronts. So my first job was to get my family situated. Then it was to focus on me. And I think one of the things I would tell people COVID or no COVID is you need to sit reflect. If it's a good experience, enjoy the experience. If for me it was like to just wallow in where I was, you know, just wallow in it, give yourself that space and the grace to say this is where I am. It's not the best situation because unless you give yourself that space and grace, how can you hold that space and grace for your family? You can't. And then just get on with it. And for me, I felt I had been at a positive 10 and now I was at a negative 10. You know, I was freezing. It was, you know, just like we were all together in this constricted space, dealing with everybody's constricted mindset, you know, and I sort of felt I had lost my purpose and I have never lived without purpose. I've been very fortunate to have a very strong role models, women role models and my mother who said to me, you know, you were born, you know, to make a difference and you were born to have a purpose and to feel suddenly I had lost my purpose was like I'd lost my radar. And I think that time to wallow and that time to have space and grace made me realize that actually my purpose had sort of fallen in that sort of space and that the thing that I have lost was actually was just buried. And once I discovered, rediscovered my purpose, I realized that the two things that make me most happy are to be of service and to learn. Well, Covid wasn't the best time to be of service. The only person I could be of service was to myself and to my family. But what I could do was to learn. And so I took a pause. I explored, I took the science of well -being, happiness, which was offered by Yale. I did a gender -based violence. I mean, that's my area along with public health from John Hopkins. I did both my certifications on health and on leadership and health and wellness. I did a transformative coaching course. I did a whole bunch of courses and sort of upgraded my skills. And the more I studied and the more I learned, the happier I felt. And so I focused sort of on my personal happiness and the happier I got, I sort of was able to hold more space for my family. It sounds like all that learning kind of re -inspired you and reinvigorated you as well. Like it's sort of that interesting chicken and egg thing where when you're not doing anything and you feel stuck and you are wallowing in it, it's hard to get out of that. And then when you do start moving forward, things really start sort of compounding in a good way. You know, it inspires you to make more changes and add more things to your plate, essentially. And I also, you know, we instituted little things like we had family dinners, everybody did their own thing. We had family dinners. You know, I tried to find other people in the foreign service community who we had been in Indonesia together, so we couldn't meet, but we could talk on the telephone. So we tried to find like a virtual community. I got onto Nextdoor. You know, I tried to find I got onto Sietar, which is this cultural, you know, I tried to find so my way of dealing with it was to create a virtual community because it was such a socially isolating period for everyone. But also, I knew that for me, community was so important. I couldn't go back to India. There was so much loss as well happening. And all you were hearing was negativity, that it was a way of maintaining positivity in one's life and networking. Sort of reconnecting with people I worked with in the past. And that's how I actually landed up getting my consultancy in Atlanta, because I reached out to a woman who I'd worked with in USAID many years ago, and she put me in touch with somebody at CARE. And there was nothing at that point. But nine months later, I got when I came to Atlanta, I had a message on my phone saying, are you interested in a consultancy with CARE? So it sounds like you really keep coming back to that idea of community and networking and finding other people. This might be an obvious question, but if there's other EFMs out there who are feeling really stuck and sort of stuck in the wallowing phase, do you have any advice for them apart from possibly finding a community? Any other steps that they might take to get themselves out of that stuck phase? So I think, you know, I mean, there are a few it depends a lot on your personality, right? I also recommend some people like to journal. I meditate a lot. Some people like to meditate. Some people like to pray. One of the things that I also recommend to people, you know, you don't have to be in this alone. It helps. I'm an ambivert. I used to be an extrovert. I'm not an extrovert. If you're an introvert, it's harder, you know, to reach out to people. But if you're at post, there are a lot of resources there. You don't have to. Nobody has to know that you're reaching out. But I always I have a clinical psychology background. Please reach out to some men if you need mental health support. There is no shame in asking for help. So please seek out any kind of support that you need. And there is so much support both at post and in the U .S. You don't have to do. Nobody has to do it alone. We were talking a little bit earlier, you and I were, about the practical advice and support that we sometimes don't get when we first become EFMs as it relates to our future careers and how those might evolve. And we were talking about clearances and non -competitive eligibility. Looking back at your career, are there any steps or things you would have done differently had you known about them in the past? I think the Department of State does a fabulous job in and I say this because I worked for USAID and for the Department of State. I worked for in Indonesia. I worked for the HR department on onboarding and I was the EFM point person. And so I know what a fabulous job the State Department does in preparing spouses who are coming out and first term officers, other officers. And these are the job opportunities. Please apply for them. And it's something that I wish USAID and other agencies would do more of and there would be more collaboration between the agencies. I've been now an EFM for 19 years and I wish I had known more or my agency, which is my husband's sponsoring agency USAID, had informed us more about non -competitive eligibility or what are the jobs that we could have applied for. I think if many of us would have known this, then when we came back to Washington, we would have had more opportunities for jobs. And as you advance in the number of years that you've been in the Foreign Service, you have that much more of an advantage when you come back to the U .S. to have access to jobs that you would normally not have. So I definitely recommend and it's my plea to EFM starting off, take advantage, whether you're with the Department of State or with other agencies such as USAID or CDC, please take advantage of the opportunities that are there. It may seem a job that doesn't match your qualifications. It doesn't matter because in the long term, when you come back and you will come back home and you will be looking for work, you will have so many more opportunities if you have put in the requirement number of years that will serve you well once you're back. And also, please go for your clearance because it took me 36 months to get my clearance and partly because I was foreign born as well. But once you have your clearance, it stays with you for the tenure of your time in the Foreign Service.
DIVORCING PATRIARCHY
"stephanie means" Discussed on DIVORCING PATRIARCHY
"Okay. Today, you need your Divorcing Patriarchy journal, preferably a pencil over a pen and a glass of water. We will be working from both an intellectual and spiritual space, and when you work from a spiritual space, it's important to drink water. You know, water is equated with healing and energy, and our bodies are composed of 55 to 60% of water. Your senses will be stretched today, so you will need to be well hydrated. All right. Let's do a review. Now, we Divine Patriarchy as a complex structure of 10 pillars of interconnected legal, social, cultural, political, and economic systems. These systems are economy and work, education, family, food or agriculture, government, health, law, marriage, military, and religion. When we refer to the Patriarchy, we're talking about this superstructure or any or all of these systems. The Patriarchy isn't a person. It's not a gender. It's a superstructure of power that organizes and operates to protect and privilege its primary beneficiaries, males. The problem with Patriarchy is a problem of inequality. The critical project of the Patriarchy is to be and to maintain absolute power. Now, both males and females can be agents, beneficiaries, males as primary beneficiaries, and females as secondary or benefactors of the Patriarchy. The existence of the Patriarchy depends on two things. One, agents or individuals willing to be in its service, and two, that there are no competing structures that threaten its dominance. Although the Patriarchy has been a dominant structure around the world, since the existence of settled agriculture, like all structures, what has been constructed can be deconstructed. Now, to divorce Patriarchy, you need to do four things. One, you need to make an informed decision to break from an identity formed from the structure of the Patriarchy. That's why we're here. We give lots and lots of information. We do our work and we work hard together to educate ourselves to be in an intellectual community to understand the logic of the Patriarchy. That will inform any decisions that you make in the future. And then there's the informing part that you have to do on your own to understand your own identity and how it was formed from the structure of the Patriarchy. The second thing you need to do is you've got to decide and actually break from being in service to the Patriarchy. The third thing is commit to a life outside the Patriarchy. Those steps will begin your journey. And lastly, just take the first step. This is the process that we're talking about when we say, divorce the Patriarchy. And we do this process to divorce each of the 10 pillars of Patriarchy. I've been obsessed lately. I'm in search of people with depth of courage and integrity. We live in a world where we're facing difficult situations in our food supplies, government, health systems, environment, our schools, homes, and our families and with our spiritual practices. Where are the people who can lead us through these thick and snarled dark matters? People with integrity and courage, you know, champions. Where are they? It's overwhelming sometimes. I consume information from lots of different sources in print, web, research, lectures, news, court cases, television, podcasts, books. I consume a lot of information on a lot of different topics. We have problems. And lately, these problems seem to be stacking and growing. And you know what I don't see a lot of? That's right, you know where I'm going with this. There's not enough depth of information about people who live with integrity and courage. My dad, one of my greatest teachers told me to look for people with integrity. He said that it's one of the most valuable qualities you can find in a person. And then he said that few people possess this quality. Well, with these problems stacking up and because we're all affected, it follows that as global citizens, we have a duty to work together to solve some of these problems. I'm obsessed. I'm in search of integrity. Who's got it? I want enough people to create a web of interconnected light filled persons with integrity rooted in courage. Shout out to Michael Beckwith for the working metaphor of an interconnected web of light. This leads me to my current thought. Is one born with integrity? Or is it nurtured? You know, nature versus nurture. I think the makings of integrity are within all of us. Integrity developed over time requires constant attention and nurturing to become deep layered and complex like a beautiful roux. We can develop our own integrity, encourage it in one another, and we can teach about integrity. But ultimately, every day, you choose who you are in the world and how you're going to show up. But in our search for integrity, we did find something uncommonly special. We found out that there are some who walk among us, destined to lead us in moments that demand great integrity and courage. Let me tell you a story. It's time to come close. A little closer. Come on in just a little closer. I want to tell you something. I know a woman. She's a metaposition who believes that your birth name is your superpower. She says it carries the encode of your spiritual DNA with information about who you are and the trajectory of your contributions to this world. Your name has an energetic charge that amplifies your character, strengths, and weaknesses. The power of your name, when invoked, conjures universal vibrations as powerful as a music chord that echoes the arc of the songs of your life journey from origin to destiny. Songs that foreshadow and songs that communicate the dynamics of your story. The precise moment you lean into your name, its meaning, its intention, and the texture of its vibrations is the precise moment that triggers magic, where you tap into your superpower to become the fullness of who you are. In that space, the fullness of who you are meets the fullness and the readiness of the universe. Many cultures around the world understand the power of a name. Parents carefully consider weigh and deliberate the choice of their newborn's name. These choices are influenced by sentiment, tradition, and spirituality. In Yoruba communities, babies are given a name describing the circumstances of their birth. In Western culture, newborns are given a first and middle name, sometimes just because it sounds pleasing, other times to carry a family name generationally forward. And when it comes to the patriarchy, names become a matter of capital. Quick cross-reference here on the social, cultural, and economic capital episode from season one. The name's become a matter of capital for its beneficiaries, a property right, a birthright, an asset as capital to buy, sell, or trade. Think of family dynasties and political and religious first families. To the patriarchy, a name, particularly the surname, is a marker that represents power and status. And that power and status is only conferred upon its primary and secondary beneficiaries. I read this really great article from The Wire called The Strange History of the Bastard in Medieval Europe. The article historically tracks the origin of the term bastard and suggests that the stigma of the term's original meaning comes not from a child being born out of wedlock, but from a child being born from a lineage lacking economic and social significance. In other words, the patriarchy assigns a person to their brand of social and legal implication through the lineage of their name. That patriarchy surname, well, it belongs to them to assign blessing or burden. But your birth name, that's a contract between you, God, and the parent or special person who God bestowed the honor upon to name you. When the heavens whisper your name, it will be in divine time. Some of you will rise to meet the moment with courage. You will accomplish great things. You are destined to bless the world right when they need it most. Magic in the making. What if you were able to observe the unfolding of magic in real time? Would you watch with wonder? What do you believe when you saw it? Can you conceive of the moment where your destiny whispers to you by name? The divine ripple effect you will create in the universe will alter the course of humanity. And we call that universal flow. To others choosing or who have chosen a life and an identity outside of the patriarchy. We owe the others a debt of gratitude for taking that magic carpet ride. Others named Fanny. The name Fanny means free one. Its French origins include the diminutive name Francis. That was grandmother's name. In Spanish, the name becomes Estefania or Stephanie, meaning crown. In Yiddish, the name is anglicized as Fego or fea meaning bird. Throughout the course of human throughout the course throughout throughout the course of human history, there is a clear evidence trail of women named Fanny who are inextricably bound to a moment in time where they fully committed themselves to showing up as an embodied force of freedom. Where freedom had been denied to all but the patriarchy. Okay, I just want to list off a few amazing women named Fanny. Fanny Brownbill was an Australian state politician and the first woman to win a seat for the Labor Party in Victoria at a time where others in power did not believe that women were suited for politics. Fanny used her political power to champion for women, children, and seniors. Fanny Hertz, a German-born British educator, was a dialogue leader and advocate on issues that advanced opportunities for women to receive an education in reading, writing, math, and needle work, rejecting the policies that single-tracked women to prepare for a life of domesticity as wives, mothers, mistresses, and servants. Fanny Allen was the first woman from New England to become a Catholic nun in the state of Vermont, demonstrating an unflinching courage to worship her God in the way she felt convicted to do so at a time in history and from a family where she had to stand on her rock alone. Then there was Fanny J. Crosby. She was an American Methodist rescue mission worker, a poet, lyricist, and composer. She was a prolific hymnist writing more than 8,000 hymns and gospel songs and became a household name by the end of the 19th century. They call her the queen of gospel songwriters. She was a strict abolitionist and was the first woman to speak in the United States Senate as she read an original poem, an advocacy for the education of the legally blind. Fanny Raoul was a French writer who challenged the patriarchy through a career of prolific, unapologetic writing. Fanny Kimball. She was an English actress, writer, and abolitionist. While staying on her husband's plantation, a slaveholder and heir to cotton, tobacco, and rice plantations in Georgia on Butler Island and St. Simon's Islands, she kept a private journal of her observations documenting the conditions of the slaves. When she spoke to her husband about her witness to the mistreatment of slaves, he threatened to deny her access to their two daughters if she published any of her observations. Well, their marriage failed and she lost custody of her children and not reunited with them until after they turned 21 years of age. During the American Civil War, she did publish those journals. Fanny Baubach was a prominent Noongar Whajuk woman who lived in Perth, Western Australia, and demonstrated an unwavering commitment to protect aboriginal land rights and resisted the British colonization of traditional Noongar lands. And then there was Fanny Carrillo. She was a leader of the women's suffrage movement in Uruguay, believing in the right of women's vote and against narratives that positioned feminism as anti-male or anti-family. The threads among, between, and through these eight global figures that span time and space form an anvil forged with the herculean strength and courage of women named Fanny and there were others. I want to talk to you about three more women with the superpower name Fanny. Fanny Eisenberg, Fanny Lou Hamer, and Fanny Willis. Miss Fanny Eisenberg or Vega Orenbuch was a Holocaust survivor born on December 3rd, 1916 in Lutz, Poland. Ten months after Miss Fanny married, she gave birth to her only daughter Josiane and in May of 1940 during the Second World War, Germany invaded and ultimately occupied Belgium. Nearly 25,000 Jews were deported from Belgium to Auschwitz, most of them murdered. Research from the United States Holocaust Museum cites that fewer than 2,000 deportees survived the Holocaust. Fanny Eisenberg was one of them. Through the Belgian resistance movement, she hid refugees in her attic and made the impossible decision to separate from her one-year-old daughter to place her into hiding so that she could have a chance to live and to be free. She wasn't permitted to know where her daughter would be or who she would be with. Following that decision, Miss Fanny and her mother were beaten by the Gestapo and taken to the Auschwitz deportation camp where she and her mother were placed in separate lines and she never saw her mother again. At Auschwitz, Miss Fanny became a part of a small group of women who encouraged each other and helped them to endure their loss, the beatings, forced labor, and other Holocaust atrocities. It was five painful years later that she was reunited with her daughter and Miss Fanny spent the remainder of her life until she was 101 years old testifying about what she witnessed during the Holocaust and teaching others to stand against hate and anti-semitism. There's another Fanny that I want to introduce you to.
Teen Mom Trash Talk
"stephanie means" Discussed on Teen Mom Trash Talk
"Can I tell you something? Yeah. I 100% like Stephanie. So I like her all the way. I think you're in our mean to her. I think that she definitely had a very, very like she was abusive to her children. She had a very bad drug problem. I know, but she's gotten her life together. I like her. She wants to help drew. She does. That's what I thought I would have. Because she understands the situation. Yes. So now, just kidding, drew, got his sentence extended. But why? Well, because he was waiting for the extension. He wanted to fight like an extension of your taxes. He filed for it. And then Mallory and Rachel are talking about how their mom was a terrible mom. They let she let them do whatever they wanted, and they both got pregnant in the house. That's where they took the loads. And they also said that Stephanie's mean to them because she's jealous of them because they're better teen moms than she was. Yes, that's what it is. They're jealous. Mallory seems to be good now, but who really knows, we don't see a lot of her. No, no, I love the whole family. I know. I really love them. I love them all. I love drew. I love Jacob. I love Cody. I love Noah. I love every single one of hazel's dads. I love them all. I don't love our next teen mom. I'm sorry. Okay, wait, time out. Didn't Stephanie have a boyfriend? Okay, I thought she did, but she never talks about it. Yeah, I guess they broke up. So, all right, kaya. Every single every episode. Yeah. We start off one or two ways. Okay, what are they? Things are really good between me and Tia isa. Or things have been really rough between me and Tia's only two. So now things are really good with her and she is. When a Moore has a little stuff dog, how is he so cute? And he's like, it's biting me. I love him. He's so cute. The Tiffany gets takeout with T is, what food did they get? Okay, I don't know, but apparently it smells good. I know. And I meant to write down the name of the restaurant. If you guys know the name of the restaurant because I was going to Google it, why don't you go into our Facebook group, teen mom trash talk podcast and let us know what kind of food that was. Yeah, I want to know everything. All right, so tease is going to go to therapy. She wants to heal her childhood trauma. Good for her. And you know what? No all, what? Kai is bad that she's gonna go to therapy. That's what it is. It doesn't believe in therapy. Well, too bad. It seems like kind of needs some therapy. Kaia's mad that teaser won't open up and I'm gonna translate this. Yeah. Kai is the kind of girl who's like, why would you go tell a stranger about me? Why don't you just talk to me? Okay, I didn't even think about that. Okay. 100% that's the problem. Kaya is not well. She can not handle emotion. But I can't even pinpoint where this goes wrong every single time..
WIBC 93.1FM
"stephanie means" Discussed on WIBC 93.1FM
"Terror. Hastings, I'm forgetting. It's definitely need. Hey, what's going on? Tara was with us earlier. Stephanie is with us right now. Which TV meteorologist. What's happening? Yeah, kind of a foggy start This morning. We touched upon it a little bit. Here we have done fog advisory for areas south of India. So just be aware of changing visibility's temperature's starting off low sixties. I think today we'll see a lot of dry daytime hours of the partly cloudy sky highs in low eighties and then later on this evening, we have a good chance of showers and thunderstorms. There might be a gusty thunderstorms embedded in there to make closer to mid Late evening, so beware of that before you go to sleep otherwise overnight lows False. The low sixties tomorrow looks cool. Mostly cloudy with a chance of scattered shower or thunderstorm. High temps only the upper sixties overnight lows Friday false the upper forties and it's looking like a cool of a memorial Day and also race day weekend by Saturday highs only in the lower sixties, we'll see a partly cloudy sky. Luckily by Sunday, we should see temps rebound to the low seventies, Plenty of sunshine and then mid seventies for Memorial Day with a mostly sunny skies. Really not ideal for the lake or the pool. But at least it's saying Dr It's ideal for race day, and I think that's what matters most. That is Stephanie Means of which TV Stephanie Thank you 60 degrees in the American Standard Cooling Weather Center. The time it's seven or seven this hour on 93 WNBC is powered by fast track, plumbing, heating and air conditioning. Way are days away from the 105th running of the Indianapolis 500 mile race. I am ready. I will be out there that pre race starts at five a.m. on 93. W I, b C and, of course You're going to hear the race only here. 93 wi be see. You gotta be tuned in. You gotta have your radio ready. Get your batteries. Plug it in. Be good to go. Tony Katz 93. W i B C Out there with me at the track will be jam V from one of 75 the fan. We will talk about the race in a second. He joins us right now, but first Adam military, calling it a career. And Hey,.
WIBC 93.1FM
"stephanie means" Discussed on WIBC 93.1FM
"Services for your estimate or repair visit. Gerber collision dot com For details Get into Gerber. Mad bear with traffic on the fives. Followers on Twitter Wi VC traffic. Stephanie Mean, which TV meteorologist What's going on? Yeah, we're still dry this morning. Just lots of cloud cover very mild temperatures in the middle sixties. Eventually, late morning, early afternoon, we are tracking a complex of showers. And if you rumbles of thunder that's going to give us some potentially heavy rains. So hopefully if you are heading out in about you, do you have some type of rain gear to keep yourself dry. We'll continue to see scattered showers and storms. Those through the afternoon and early evening hours. Daytime highs will hold. In the middle sixties on an overnight lows tonight, she fall to the forties, with showers beginning to end as we approach midnight tonight, once they will be completely dry will be partly cloudy sky daytime highs still cooler in the lower sixties. Scattered showers returned just in time for Thursday with high still holding in the low sixties and then by Friday. Hi is at 63 degrees to see a partly cloudy sky and Mother's Day weekend for right now, just like a touch, soggy with scattered afternoon showers and storms Saturday with highs in the middle sixties so kind of a cooler stretch out ahead of us. That right? There is Stephanie meet of Wish TV. Stephanie. Thank you. 65 degrees in the American Standard Cooling Weather Center. The time right now is 807 this'll Hour on 93. W. B. C is powered by the home loan expert dot com. I'm not quite sure how it's possible. That nobody has looked at the prosecutor, Marion County, Ryan Miers and said, You have to go now. Because your failure Isn't.
WIBC 93.1FM
"stephanie means" Discussed on WIBC 93.1FM
"These storms is between 10 P.m. this evening and four a.m. tomorrow, which TV meteorologist Stephanie Mean We'll have more on your forecast coming up in just Moment, a devastating feeling. That's how Hudson Miller, a cathedral high school student, described what it was like to find out that his friend from Cathedral Linden Bayram, was killed in a car crash when he was on his way to the Hamilton Heights Prom's Saturday night is like telling us about it how sad he was to get to go to a prom and everything just like thinking about it now it's like so crazy. Outside. He was to get the like. Get to go do that, with his girlfriend, Miller, telling our news gathering partners. It was TV that this isn't the first time a cathedral student has died recently. Bayram and his girlfriend were both killed when the car they collided with when the car they were in collided with an SUV. Police were trying to figure out the cause of the crash. The state's coronavirus numbers appear to be holding steady. Donnie Burgess reports the Indiana Department of Health reported just over 1000 new cases of coronavirus Sunday. That brings us to nearly set 123,000 Hoosiers that have tested positive for covert 19. The department also reported 11 new deaths, making that nearly 13,000 people that have died from the virus. The state's positivity rates have dropped. The overall rate is at a 0.8%. While the seven day rate is at 4.4%, Donnie Burgess 93. W. Y B C mobile new making sure Hoosiers are confident in the process, Kurt Darling reports and how the new Indiana Secretary of State Holly Sullivan is shoring up the state's elections. Sullivan is confident that Indiana's elections are secure, mostly because while she was in the state Legislature, it was she that offered the bill that did so did carry the bill for the secretary of state. Office before the 2020 election that enabled the cyber security that was put in place before the 2020 election in Indiana. She tells into politics, Hoosier should not concern themselves with what happened in states like Pennsylvania or Georgia. In 2020, where election results were challenged over speculation of voter fraud. Sullivan is touring the state this year to gauge voter confidence among Hoosiers. Kirk Darling 93 w Y. B C Mobile news shooting on the west Side of Indianapolis, and police are investigating and happened near Lawndale Avenue and Beach Way. Drive around eight Sunday night, which is near 10th Street in Rockville Road. One person was found with a gunshot wound, and they were taken to a hospital in critical condition. Scott Dixon one race one of an IndyCar doubleheader weekend in Texas, making it his 51st win, tying Mario Andretti for second most wins all time. The next day Pato award got his first career win. It was There was definitely a few moments where Where.
WIBC 93.1FM
"stephanie means" Discussed on WIBC 93.1FM
"Having a stolen car into a gun store and taking off with weapons, grab the rain and snow gear when we're expecting rain, and when that is going to switch over to wintry mix, finding out her faith, the vote set for today and how it will impact the controversial Georgia congresswoman future. He's a daybreak starts now. Welcome to Thursday morning, five o'clock on the dot Thanks for joining us on this February 4th. Yeah. Good morning to you. We're gonna get straight to Stephanie mean because this forecast is really important. If you have some plans to time it out around all of this stuff, especially later on today, where we do have that potential for showers entering back into the forecast clouds. A bit chilly this morning improvements, though in the temperature department this morning compared to yesterday morning by almost five degrees or so, for a lot of spots, upper twenties to near 30 degrees for a lot of locations. More cloud cover around with us. I think today will see a little less sunshine compared to the past few days. Upper twenties here in Indianapolis. A 28 23 Coca Mel, Low thirties in the Chicago Land area. 31 26. In South Bend 32 degrees in Evansville to start off our Thursday morning feel like temperatures improvements even in this department as well. We're seeing a lot more twenties than teens and in some cases yesterday, single digits, although there are a few spots still cold feels like it's eight in Port Wayne 12 and Coco Mon 18 and Indianapolis and 18 also up in South Bend right now, though, we are waking up dry, so we're really not looking at anything impacting the morning drive. We do a two systems here We noticed showers out near ST Louis that will eventually impact us as we head through the later half of the day today, timing on this here in our future cast model shows mainly quite conditions to the rest of daybreak and threw a good portion of early afternoon notice. Hereby around 12 30 are far Western communities picking up on some rain pockets of some moderate rain embedded in there. We'll see that potential of on enough showers through mid to late afternoon by around 5 30. There is that possibility, especially in northern Indiana for seeing the light wintry mix. And then once we have this cold front swing in here, it's going to transition for a very brief period of time. Any rain into some lighter snow showers temperatures today, though, should top out in the upper thirties to near 40. We are tracking shower opportunities this weekend, though we are tracking snow, so stick around for timing on that and also where temperatures airheaded as well coming up Michael forecasts Roadways this morning, out looking okay, who are tracking and traveling out in about this picture in your eyes? 17 years, Sam Jones Expressway on the city's east or South West side. Rather looks okay for commuters.