2 Burst results for "Sandler Brown"
"sandler brown" Discussed on Become Your Own Best Friend Podcast
"Why do we have the best intentions and then not for through on them. Essentially why we procrastinating this has come up for me taking taking over the last weeks at last couple of weeks so i thought it would be a good time to share my journey and the lessons i learnt throughout that this situation in both me procrastinate for a number of weeks on something that i could have done very simply. Let me explain. I save clients face to face at a pilates cheery in south melbourne and they're running a spring challenge because it's just gone on spring a few days who garden and they said to me. Would i like to put some of my brushes in sri bags that they were giving to the clients for all this brain challenge and i thought excellent that's great so they asked me two weeks ago about getting the purchase organized and i hadn't i needed needed to create them from scratch <hes> to make sure it was contextualized full days clients and i remember going onto mm to vistaprint and a few other websites and having a little bit of a look at some brushes and then all of a sudden thought to hunt boskin all set this aside and hopefully it magically against done now of course i left it and left it and then go to message sage two weeks later thing. Have you got the brushes ready. We wanna pack them tomorrow and straightaway of just thought all nor what have i done had two weeks to get this done. A could've easily had it sorted wakes and of left at right up until the last minute. They wanted the next morning <hes> on the wednesday. I take all day on a wednesday and in the evening as well so i had no time i'm on wednesday so i had to wake up thursday morning before work and jump onto a software program i'm cody campbell and create at my own version and then cooled off this works and they said that they would put them on the spot etc so eventually. I sorted allen's <hes> but i'm really wanted to bring this up on the point. Caution have talk about it is because there was so many months issues around that the issue wasn't you know leaving something until the last minute it was the mindset around it and and <hes> hopefully as things can help you out because i'm sure with all done this before left something until the last minute but does all ways a raisin and this is what i say to my clients and whenever i'm trying to help people understand others more effectively we all have a raise raise them behind why we do certain things and i spoke about this previous episode about understanding other people in insane other the people's point of view and the reason why we do things is because we have an underlying belief. Oh mindsets about that end. You may may not understand why doing things that they are and you're probably doing them as well. Sofa sofa made that was three lessons that stand out with this particular situation number one was recognizing when you self sabotage him and this was a classic example. I just let myself procrastinate because i was trying to hold myself back or hold myself small because i knew that if i potentially if i got the versions out to everyone than i would have you know more clients except trump fear i guess was <hes> coming up and that sort of maybe self sabotage so when you you think about if you'll procrastinating on a certain thing and you're not getting it done just have to think about is a fiat and are you trying to hold yourself back on purpose. So is there a little bit of self sabotage at carrying the next lesson island was take time is never the issue. It's the story telling yourself about time for me. I made up a whole story that hundred a time to get these brushes down. It's going to take too long. It's a lot of effort to do <hes> so i'll just leave it until i get time now. Now of course what happened was when i had to do it. I got it done. I woke up a full work. I had out work all sorted on a program within. I would say probably forty five minutes and then by the time i made the coles <hes> to say about getting them printed olaf. It took me about about an hour and then simply going to the store to get it printed. Was maybe another twenty minutes. So all of a sudden something that i conceived in my mind was going to take me a really long time and a lot of effort actually took me an hour and twenty minutes wish i could have easily found wake cigar and i definitely do have an hour and twenty minutes on certainly not that busy where i do not have the time time again it was. I just found it so fascinating. Now looking back on that situation was i. I couldn't believe how much i kept telling myself at the time time. I don't have time to do this. It's going to take too long. It's going to be too much effort and then yeah when to wake up and just get it. Donna just didn't i didn't have a story about that. I just have to get this done and it's amazing. When we over sudden do have that pressure that we can actually get it done so that was another. One of my lessons is learning that time is not the issue. It's the story worry with helen u._s._o. About how much time we have along with that story is all the mental drama that we have the balance that we realize afterwards that there is actually no drama. It's just open created a now hedge so question. I like to oss myself which i i should have asked myself at the time but i didn't now looking back. That would have been great. Question is what this look like. If it were easy so when i got us to do those brochures and realize i didn't have anything for that those specific clients. I should've asked myself self the question okay. I need to get this done. What would it look like if it were easy and then i could have said to myself okay of the program. I've got some artwork. <hes> i know what i want to say. Excellent august block an hour out in my calendar and play around with it too much because we is something like a creative thing like that you can get so busy procrastinating on all the busy stuff that doesn't actually get you anywhere so changing phones and pictures and all that sort of thing where we feel like what being productive but not really it's just a very <hes> tricky way for our brain's <unk> catches out on not <hes> so back to that question. What would it look away easy. If i have got myself into that and then i could've gone and created that on the program credit into a p._d._f. Gone and got it printed that would have removed all the mental drama in my ahead and also lead time issue so if you guys if you're having any situations like this which i know some of you will be is just simply getting rid of the drama in your head and getting rid of the time issue because you not. It's yes that that's not the issue at all and just asking yourself. Will what would this be locked away easy. You know we always try and make things a lot harder than what we actually are and then of course if they had what do we do put them in the two hot <unk> set it aside for later but in the meantime we stress about got it that whole time just like i was the two full weeks. I was thinking about every day. I just go get braces on owner. It's too hot <unk> tomorrow and so it's it's like i've been living not stress for two weeks. When if i had the way i wouldn't have had that problem so when you're in situations like that it's just recognizing. What story are you talking about yourself. Particularly about time f fits <hes> when it comes to getting things done and also a new belief that i have started to adopt which is so far in working really well is is on the kind of person he gets things done at the first opportunity imagine saying that to yourself on the kana pass in get things done at the first opportunity and this could be anything. Does anyone procrastinate on during the dishes the laundry three. I don't know what other chores are there. Where you procrastinate on matinee feature said to yourself well. I am the contests and get things things done at the first opportunity and then you just do it and remove the mental drama and then all of a sudden what stopped is you stressing about it afterwards that you haven't go down a new still need to get it done so i lent this <hes> from my previous coach sandler brown and it was certainly very helpful and i know you can feel myself procrastinating on things i more tiny things like just generally household stuff <hes> it works really well and old son to snap out of it and <hes> just get it done straightaway but of course something like these brushes it just brought up so many other underlying issues underlying beliefs beliefs which is why i wanted to chachi guys about it so that you could learn something from it through because out brain likes to convince us of some pretty pretty interesting things my brain in this situation definitely want to stay six and wanted to stay in my comfort soaring so do it kind of kept me from. I guess branching out because if i if i have created them when i set out was is going to wake subaru when i told myself i was going to so at that first opportunity and if i have all the evidence and what if it didn't pay off off what if it was a foul what if my effort was wasted and the some times tends to happen with offices that will worried about putting in the effort because we're worried that it might be wasted and so therefore if we leave things until the last last minute then we can kind of an excuse and a bit of an out that way it doesn't work out. We can say oh well. I mean it would've gone better if i had done it a few weeks ago and if i have more time but i just run out of time so i kind of had to do what i could does this sound familiar at all when you're back in high school studying for exams or doing an assignment. Did anyone leave. You've studying for exams until the last minute cramming as we like to collate now again if you don't do while on the that exam you've you've got it out and you've got a really good excuse because you said he self all will. I would have done better if i didn't have to cram but i had to cram because iran at a time because of course so many other things to do again. We know that that's just downwind being really sneaky out brain <hes> china anna lawless into a false sense of reality when really the reality is you do have the time you just making a drama out of it and therefore you're perceiving that you don't have enough time so again out. Brian likes to keep us nice and safe and and also out identified as safe as well so that was something that came up for me when i was really thinking about what happened is i've got this identity wendy that i've got potential and i've been told that ever since i was in high school without i've got potential so it's almost like for myself in situations holding back effort because if i put in the full effort and i don't succeed then all of a sudden. I don't have potential well well in my mind. I don't so i hold myself back a little bit than my identity of having potential can be true <hes> so so if this resonates with you if you feel you're a person that's gonna potential but never put dinner full effort you sorta. Hold yourself back back just very sneakily. Not you know not consciously and again it's to protect your identity and and so this is more about being <hes> just self aware that this is happening in this is what our brain is doing. Because of course you can overcome it and i know you're by <hes> talking about these lessons from why went in a situation that it can help other people because until you have to put itself out there. It's sometimes these issues. Don't really come up until you'll put in that situation so does have i think about <hes> what you'll identity is and how you're trying to protect it. The loss lesson that i learned and so the first one was about recognizing self sabotage second one was the fact that time is not really the issue. It's the story we're telling us what was about time and the third one was self. Trust now. This is a really interesting one <hes> because this is what i was talking about at the start of the episode when i said following through without plans so we create these plans and then all of a sudden something comes up with tied we don't have time whatever else ities and we dark forward through without penn plans now each time that happens we lose a little bit of trust without selves so you could imagine if you've got a friend and you organized to catch up with them and they keep canceling on you at the loss minute and this is maybe happened five times. Would you trust that.
"sandler brown" Discussed on The Lavendaire Lifestyle
"Before oughta current versus future me? Yes. Yeah. It's really like that really is the self image stuff, totaling rightly believe, you're this kind of passan and in the future on this kind of passing. So. Again, it's really important to just pick one because it takes so much conscious energy to direct your mind that, but if someone's done that exercise to them to pick one of those things ENTEL themselves on Pappas that new posit men in those moments of decision to act as if that new passan tell themselves that new person tell other people the new positon and not be surprised when the new person, that's when you become the new person for sure. All right. So now, I'm gonna move onto the rapid fire questions, which I ask all of our guests at the end of the show. Are you ready? Yes. Okay. What does your dream life? Look like, I was recently doing the ideal day generally exercise, and whenever I do it. It really involves a lot of rating hand involves going out in nature for walks and hopefully being by the ocean on some kind of buddy of what? But to just be doing meaningful. Walk into have meaningful relationships, and it's. Really the simple stuff like the connection with other people. The love having these really amazing experiences while I can help people love coaching. I love talking about all of this stuff so much and just doing that as often as I can while also enjoying all of the other things connecting with people going out in Asia. Olivet numb to end reading. I love reading awesome. So what is one book or resource that you recommend to everybody? I love Darren greatly by burning Brown or any work that she's ever put out. She also has some really great conversations with oil pro on YouTube, and I also love the life coach school pug cost with Brooke cosc- Ori is my favorite Pok costs. And she really teaches you how to be your own coach. And a lot of what I shown a huge pot of my past development Jenny has been what I've learned from teaching. So they would be might to go cheap. People Bernie Brown cassia. Awesome. What is one habit that has changed your life? Definitely my morning routine. But within not I'd say John Lyng has been the go-to potted my morning routine consistently. But that's really what got me through the walking full-time and then getting out of that situation by creating a morning routine. And even though it didn't feel great to be in that morning routine. I think it's so powerful to do something for yourself before you do something feel boss, regardless of whether your employees issue, you'll Orrin boss, a Jahn, I really try to honor that still to be doing things for myself before I do think for me as my own boss infamy that looks like reading John Elaine going for wo going to the gym before. I actually sit down to do so morning. Retaining has been my absolute favorite. And I do have a morning retain guide if you listen is would like help with how to customize in setup a morning, retain specifically to perfectionist. I talk about the. Nothing mindset in Hello, defection, est. Wants to really create this elaborate three hour morning routine. And how to actually oca- straight a routine will base that you can stick to consistently while also being released his find. So if anyone wants to download that they can go to Sam Brown dot com slash Levin debt, and that'll be the them, but moaning retain fischel has being my favorite to foundational habit. Awesome. I'll share that link in the show notes next one is the best life or career advice you've ever gotten. I think it would be this from a particular passan, but when I was listening to these pug costs and still I listened to a love put gust. It's really this underlying message of if you assist you will succeed. That's really what got me through those couple of years. I just had this idea in my head that is going to be at least two years until I see any kind of results in so many people want that instant results one in some follow. Hours instant feedback. But I just had this idea my head it's gonna take time. So I don't mean to make it mean anything if I'm not getting that instant feedback that instant result. So he had made if he possessed you will succeed. And of course, sometimes you need to pivot and change what you're doing just that underlying assistance, so many people don't persists. So if you can assist through that period by not might have. But you're not getting results says that dip in between that if you can get three that you are not above in the sense that you're about a passing, but your head of a lot of other people because moist people never make it through that dip. So that has been a belief that I keep reminding myself in has really become such coal belief that I hold to that has to be the best advice of gun for sure that's like one of my core beliefs to like, you don't have to be great or going fast like as long as you just don't stop and never give up like you'll eventually get somewhere yet. The. The last one is finish the sentence. The most amazing part about life is to love and beloved. I think it all comes back to Deutsche feelings. And of course, everything we do is to make us feel way to avoid certain feeling. And I think love is the ultimate feeling is great to feel loved. But also love other things. Love people to love experiences that feeling of love both coming in and going out. I think is the most amazing thing about life. I also love the internet ambit-. We're able to have conversations. And connect with people around the world. I'm so grateful for the internet, and I say three good things with my boyfriend every night at one thing right before. And so often, it's I'm so grateful for the internet and everything that it allows us today. Sorry, I think I don't love, but love and emotional level and practically I'd say the internet in the time that we're in right now. Yeah. Just like I feel very lucky to live during the era show. Okay. Lastly where can our listeners by new online? They can find me on my pasta defection projects. It's a solar showing righteous go deep into all the things I'm walking on. And it's really about affectionate him and all of the different things that come up as well, and how to manage everything. And all of that affection project is probably the best place. My love is semler Brown dot com and on Instagram at Sandler Brown. Awesome. Thank you so much Sam. I thank you so much for your insights on perfectionism. Thank you so much. All right. I hope that conversation with Sam Laura Brown to be honest. I had more questions that I wanted to ask her. But I felt like we really spent a long time digging deep with procrastination and the self image technique. So hopefully, you got something out of that. I personally really liked the self image technique because it is a mix of lava traction kind of believing something before it's real. But it is also psychological and very real to be able to change your beliefs about who you are. And. See that change in the reality of things another important tip that she shared that. I wanna point out is when you are acting as if you are that person that you wanna be don't act surprise. Don't act surprise like, oh, I actually woke up earlier than usual today act as if it's a normal thing that happens all the time, and you'll be more inclined to believe that's true with that point. I'm gonna leave it at that. Hope you have a beautiful day. Love y'all fi. All right. That's it. For today's episode. Thank you so much for listening to the lavender lifestyle. If you like this podcast, please show your support by leaving a review on itunes next. Make sure you check out the twenty nineteen artist of life workbook and the daily planner by lavender on my website, lavender dot com slash shop. Lastly, you can catch on YouTube and Instagram at lavender where I have even more content for the artist of life, sending you so much love. Bye.