20 Episode results for "S. D. A."
015: The Top 6 ways to cope when your teenager drives solo for the first time
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood NB. Twenty-first-century, if what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me, Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. In today's episode, I'll discuss my top six ways to cope when your teenager drives solo low for the first time. Wait. The day that your teenager gets their driver's license in drives a substantial distant so low for the first time is interesting for a parent. Now there are other adjectives I could have chosen other than interesting appropriate choices would also be horrifying. Terrifying. Nauseating. Post traumatic stress inducing. Nothing can adequately prepare you for this moment aside perhaps from performing test runs by handing the teenager a loaded bazooka with the safety off in. them to sprint through a crowd of people with it. That's fairly close. Having recently experienced this joyful occasion myself. I've compiled a shortlist that may help you unfortunate parent in the same predicament deal with the situation better than I did. My method was to essentially curl myself into a fetal position in a corner, sucking my thumb and whimpering until my teenager made it home without killing himself for somebody else. If you have something more effective. Please let me know because I get to do this two more times. So in no particular order. Here are my top six ways to cope when your teenager drive solo for the first time number six simply knock yourself out. Find a way to render yourself. While he is on the road. Make an attempt to stick with illegal substances or methods, but spare no effort. Number five obsessively stare at the fine my friends APP on your phone while you're a teenager is driving. Keep refreshing it over and over and zooming in as far as possible in a vain attempt to actually see your kid on the road instead of just his picture in around dot on your phone. Number four without telling her follow your teenager in another car. where a fake moustache glasses in case she looks in her rear view. Mirror. Put a fake mustache and glasses on your car to. Number three rig the car. Hire a mechanic to alter your kids vehicle in such a way that upon reaching an inappropriate speed or getting too close to another car it turns itself often rolls to a gentle stop field of flowers and butterflies. Number to declare a federal holiday, call it national everybody stay at home day so that traffic will be at a minimum. Tell everyone except for your teenager. And number one rap, the entire vehicle and your teenager in bubble wrap. Then wrap all the other vehicles, trees and various obstacles within a two state area in bubble wrap as well. And here's a bonus idea. If none of these are adequate, consider moving your family to the Himalayas where they have no vehicles. Let the kid righty Yak instead the fresh air will be good for him. Over everybody's. Just, you've been listening to the DOOFUS. Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark E. Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A. D. DOT COM.
022: Find your carnival ride
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood NB twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me. Mark. Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. Today I take a look at the weird and curious phenomenon of the carnival ride. Wait. This is a blog post I wrote more than a decade ago. And that I just ran across today. It was clearly written back when the fear of invisible viruses wasn't even a gleam in anybody's eye. It made me smile and I'm hoping it has the same effect on you. Find Your Carnival ride. As summer prepares to morph into fall. This thought has recently crossed my mind. Carnivals, fairs and amusement parks are some of the more interesting an enigmatic curiosities devised by the human brain. I mean think about this for a minute. What do we do? We go through the grueling process of loading up young kids with all their various accoutrements. For the thirty to forty minute trip to the fair grounds on a steamy August Day. Then we brave excruciating lines, crazy cutbacks stomach churning dips and valleys wade through the pickpockets and Hawkers and navigate a crushing sweating. Humanity with its nauseating arrays of organic. And that's just in the parking lot. We bravely persevere through these obstacles mostly for one thing the carnival ride. That's right. The reward for our sacrifice is that we happily pay some exorbitant price to stand in line for roughly the same amount of time that Otzi, the iceman freeze dried in the Italian Alps so that we can climb aboard a concoction of rusty tubing and faded plastic that is operated by a guy who is the proud owner of a greasy mullet and approximately five teeth. Any concern for the bodily welfare of ourselves or our children somehow is wiped clean as we enter the midway as if by some Jedi. mind. Trick. Then we allow our God. Given earthly temples to be flung to and fro up and down and side to side. Come on. Let's go again. Why do we do this? Now I'm no psychiatrist but I suspect that is because we all at some point in our lives need to feel slightly if not completely out of control. Some people like stunt men and women, dare-devils, astronauts, kindergarten teachers, and the like take this to the extremes. But for most of us a carnival ride every once in a wild does the trick. For just a few minutes perhaps just once a year we get to soar on swings spin upside down and ride a rickety track at breakneck speeds with nothing but our faith in the good Lord and a bunch of Phillips head screws and metal pipe. It's an exhilaration that is largely absent in everyday life. Or is it? Ever change the diaper of a baby boy who recently polished off twelve ounce bottle of formula. Got To be fast. Or watched as your six year old dribbles the soccer ball towards the goal with only the goalie inbetween while a mob of red face parents scream bloody murder from either side of the field. Or stood by as a loved one breathes his last in passes into the next life. Or shared belly laugh with your wife as you send silly and downright dirty emails to each other during the middle of a work day. The carnival rides are there. You just gotTa spot them climb aboard and hold on. And you don't even have to stand in line. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A. D. Dot. com.
016: Its official: Im rich!
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood NB twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. On today's episode I'll tell you about my newfound wealth because it's official. I'm. Church. Great News to report today I. decided to take a closer look at the barrage of emails I've been receiving lately and boy am I glad I did I appear to be filthy stinking rich No more mortgages no more nine to five grind no more million mile vehicles with discolored leather under the baby seat. It's all caviar and champagne from here on out baby. It's a curious thing my richness. Not that I'm complaining but the source of my incredible newfound wealth seems to derive from a variety of foreign nations and or high powered governmental offices despite the fact that I've only ever been to a few Caribbean islands, a couple of Mexican border and resort towns the Canadian side of Niagara Falls and Nepal once. A series of providential coincidences have occurred. First of all, I've somehow either sewed wild oats across large swaths of the globe. I was especially busy in the African nations or one of my swashbuckling ancestors was getting around and getting busy independent of each other my kinfolk all seemed to be financial geniuses who are dropping like flies from a variety of fatal illnesses. They are desperate to pass on their earnings to dear all American cousin mark and finally got in touch with me today after months of leg work and research, which means they Google Me Bravo cousin Agnes Model Wa. Okay. Secondly, I've made fantastic overseas stock market investments apparently in my sleep or in a stupor of some kind because I remember none of it. These astute acquisitions have resulted in flowing rivers of gold. Thirdly at the US Department of Homeland Security, the secretary there who at the time I wrote this was secretary Janet Napoletano no less has been hard at work at my quote unquote case with her quote. Unquote fraud. Monetary. Unit. Some illicit combination of gambling inheritance lottery winnings and perhaps a McDonald's scratch off game has netted me twenty seven point five, million Somalians dig that Oh, I almost forgot. I'm also now absurdly rich because the Benin Republic you know the one next to Togo says a again quote provisions affidavit of claim certificate for legal cover slash protection of us one point two, million dollars in favor of you. I'm not convinced that's an actual Senate with the subject and a verb and all, but I'll take the money anyway. All I have to do is send the Benin Republic Mr Joseph Di Atwood in particular sixty eight bucks but that's okay because I'm. Over? added. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A. D. DOT COM.
024: 11 awesome reasons why you should embark on an adventure travel trip as soon as possible
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of Fatherhood in the twenty first century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus all. In today's episode, I give you my eleven awesome reasons why you should embark on an adventure travel trip as soon as possible. Now I wrote the following blog in twenty nineteen back before travelling anywhere further away than your mailbox wasn't viewed as a high risk activity and the inside of an airplane wasn't viewed as the setting of a horror movie where everybody gets eaten by giant bugs. After the world gets a handle on this virus, the name of which must not be mentioned out loud. I have faith that the adventurous among us will return to the friendly and much more sanitary skies on their way to experiencing the world as God intended us to do in my opinion. But until then enjoy my eleven awesome reasons why you should embark on an adventure travel trip as soon as possible. The concept of adventure travel is a relatively recent trend that is gaining popularity among Americans. It is loosely defined as a trip to an exotic locale where at least part of your agenda involves physical activity like hiking, climbing scuba diving or swimming vigorously immediately prior to being eaten by a crocodile that can swim faster. As a person who generally tends to avoid visiting places where I might be viewed as a menu item, I have chosen the Himalayas as my adventure travel destination of choice, the Yeti after all is known mostly for leaving weird footprints and staying put just long enough for a blurry indistinguishable photograph at a great distance. That seems pretty safe to me in all seriousness. There's a reason why adventure travel is the thing to do. Actually. There are a bunch of reasons, but I'm going to present you with the best eleven. So here we go in no particular order number eleven. Because we can. Humans in our modern forms have supposedly been on earth for about three hundred, thousand years. But. We've only been able to move efficiently around Globe for the past seventy or so that means that for two, hundred, ninety, nine, thousand, nine, hundred, and thirty years. Folks were born lived and died pretty much in their own little spot on the globe having never experienced any other part of it with the exception of a few people like Columbus Lewis and Clark and Marlin Perkins even after comfortable air travel was available in tiny bags of peanuts were invented visiting exotic places was usually an activity reserved for only rich adventures, not ordinary folk like us. It was simply too expensive. But that's no longer the case. In two, thousand, nineteen most adventure travel trips are within the financial reach of a great many people. Sure. It might take a bit of concentrated saving and planning, but traveling to Nepal or Peru or Iceland is something that almost anybody can do if they really want to it's no longer impossible and frankly it's no more expensive than a week at Disneyworld. Number Tin Memories. One of the many reasons I'm obsessed with all things related to space and my wife will confirm this. Is Because of the different perspective. It provides for US earthlings. In the grand scheme of things, we exist on a very tiny planet one of a number akin to grains of sand on a beach for a microscopic blip of time. Life is fast, fleeting and never guaranteed. For those reasons, I believe in two things number one never missing the opportunity to polish off a slice of really good key lime pie and number two making as many memories as possible. Now going to Walmart to buy a pair of socks doesn't count as a memory I'm talking about the memories you will cherish for the rest of your life. These are what enrich our little dash on the time line of human history. Number, nine photographs and videos. At the risk of sounding like a Kodak Commercial. In, kids that was a camera company from the old days are memories no longer need to be recorded only in our brains. Modern photographic technology is to adventure travel. What peanut butter is to? Jelly. In fact, I'm convinced that the Himalayas were invented specifically so that we could take selfies in front of them. At all narcissism. Aside, it is pretty swell to be able to look back at photos of yourself and your buddies standing in front of Macho up to Mount Everest or even the Great Barrier Reef. And I guess that would be swimming in front of or diving in front of now I'm not talking about bragging rights and I'll get to that in a minute I'm talking about being able to remind yourself that you were actually there and enjoy the flood of memories that will always accompany the viewing of an adventure travel selfie. There are very few things in life that are more valuable than a photo of yourself hopefully with friends and family in an exotic setting. Number Eight, the story. Was the great things about living to be an older person not referring to myself of course, is having access to a vast collection of stories. Everybody has stories they can tell and we all love hearing a well-crafted narrative. It's part of the human condition. And although I love a good dollywood vacation story as much as the next guy, it's hard to beat a tale about approaching Mount Everest base camp at seventeen thousand, six, hundred feet in the midst of a snowstorm or how you outnegotiated a Katmandu taxi driver over a two dollar fair or landed the Perfect Rainbow Trout in a high mountain Patagonian stream while being stalked by. Puma. These stories will always win at any family reunion. Number seven physical challenges. As, much as I love a standard vacation at a coochie resort, it doesn't really compare to adventure travel. The real reward comes with training, working sweating and putting our earth suits to the test. Cooking yourself like a giant breakfast sausage under a Myrtle beach son is admittedly a wonderful thing but it's hardly an adventure although sunburn stories can be pretty good. On the other hand adventure travel often provides an opportunity to push ourselves and measure physical and mental toughness. Now, that's a rare thing in a world that is increasingly designed for our comfort, convenience and well laziness. Six spirituality. Whether. You're Christian. Hindu Buddhist Jewish or anything else and apologies if you didn't get a shout out finding yourself in nature that is unencumbered by civilization is an all inspiring thing and we'll often bring you closer to God and whatever form he she or it takes. It's difficult to find yourself in the shadow of mount on Madaba, Lem and not have some sense of a higher power even for the most hard core. Among us. If nothing, else adventure travel tends to make one much more philosophical and inwardly aware than a week ended say Vegas. Number five exposure to new cultures. By definition adventure travel will put you into an exotic locale where life is not what you're used to. In many cases, these locations are Third World countries where the standard of living is vastly different from the lazy lives we lead in Western developed societies. Is this sometimes uncomfortable. You Bet is a good for you. Absolutely. Experiencing in entirely foreign country is a rare valuable gift because with the perspective it provides. Number four friendships. Traveling long distances and then embarking on a demanding trekker something similar has an uncanny way of forging and reinforcing strong friendships. It's all about shared hardships, joys, laughs, and even boredom. I E layovers at the airport. I highly recommend traveling with at least one buddy and within a larger group of people you don't know all that well. I promise. You'll make new friends. Number three. Food. This is another one of those comfort zone areas. Sure when you travel to exotic places, you'll encounter exotic foods. Some of them may appear unappetizing or downright Hickey. But always remember that even though your palate might be unaccustomed to the dish, we humans are all constructed the same way. If it doesn't hurt the humans in Kenya or Nepal or Japan it probably won't hurt you. Give it a try with an open mind. Number two risk. Now this is one of my favorites, but believe me I don't have a death. Wish. I'm not going out of my way to drastically increase my chances at death. But as we all know just driving to the grocery store for a loaf of bread is riskier than most things especially these days. All I'm saying is don't let your fear of risk rule out a world of incredible experiences and stories. There are ways to reduce the risk of whatever you're doing like wearing your seatbelt, for example. On the other hand, a little risk is to me part of what makes a story worth telling and adventure worth having. And Number One. Example, for children. Now. Lastly for you parents out there. Teacher kids by example. Show them that our planet is meant to be experienced and not only in TV documentaries. For my wife Holly and I creating a Nepal tracking company was an outrageous idea about as likely as the concept of walking on the moon was in nineteen sixty one. Yet just as Neil Armstrong illustrated to the world we proved to our children that if you dream big enough and work hard enough, you can achieve seemingly impossible things. We have since walk the same trails as some of the world's greatest adventurers in heroes. We made the decision to go and we made it happen. Now one day our kids will think their parents were really cool and not today though. My point is if we could do this anybody can. including. You. Batteries. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A. D.. Dot Com.
Episode 25: My Dad
"How many people do we encounter on a daily basis? Have you ever taken the time to consider what those people are going through the dreams, aspirations, fears and challenges that are faced each day. Make every individual unique can our understanding or interactions with these individuals help them overcome the mountains that are faced each and every day. We think so because it's the little things that can make a big difference. And here's Mitch and Jake. Welcome to the little things with met Chant Jake Jake episode twenty five a quarter of a century here how we doing. Doing. Fantastic my man as of this recording right now it's Chilai I. How bananas is that? It is in the midst of a pandemic. It is unbelievable But we haven't slowed down. You know there's no We're not wearing masks right now or anything like that. We're just. We're just out here doing a podcast. Out here doing podcast. You know I saw something today. That was actually Kinda funny. One of the sportscenter anchors reached out and he's like you know. Since it was July first, he said let's be a a second half team here in two thousand twenty, and I think those pretty applicable. Because the first six months of twenty twenty have been a bit chaotic to say the least once you say, yes, but you know. How was in two thousand and nineteen in the spring there, too, with all the snow and stuff we got so I think we're. Yeah we'RE GONNA. Have to have a good second half overtime. Throughout this season. We're going to be talking about things. We have given up on one organization. That will always be there for us. In time of need is a national guard. Today's South Dakota Army. National Guard remains strong with more than thirty one hundred soldiers available to execute its missions the mission of the S. D. A. R. N. G. is to provide combat capability to the war fight security for the homeland and provide combat ready units in three roles, federal state and community special. Thank you to those serving our country from us at the little things. Our main goal is to show you that by appreciating the little things in life and understanding what the people around us are enduring. We can increase everyone's quality of life. So the question of the day. What is something you've given up on? The answer to that question Jake. My Dad holy smokes. We are lucky enough to have to stand up gentlemen in our lives. But I'll tell you what jake is giving up on the dad thing. It's becoming more and more common elaborate. While, it certainly is and just right when you say that you know I've I've heard obviously read the book Mitch but. You know this season is based on the question. What is something you have given up on just the answer and hearing it again? My Dad is just such a Gut Punch, isn't it? It's it's just. It makes my gut churn a bit because you know if you're new to the little things, this was a question that was posed to to middle and high school students. You know by you mentioned in the answers were anonymous, and to have you know you know much a child? Basically say that they've given up on their parent. It's it's just gut wrenching A. A little bit so I! I'm curious excited to dive in here and and kind of uncover and see maybe where this was coming from in see if we can can relate to some stories out there, and hopefully you know if some of the stuff is going on. Hopefully, we can further some of those questions and help some people out so looking forward to this. I think it's important for us to realize that we have no idea what the people around us are enduring, and we've brought it up a handful of times, but I think it's an important reminder for those around us. We just have no idea what people are going through the baggage that they have to carry day in and day out their students, trying to achieve and be able to pursue their goals and dreams. It's people that are constantly waking up punching the clock to to make ends meet. These are the people that are. Dealing with this kind of stuff, and the first step to helping them is appreciating their strength and understanding what they're going through we can. We can help these people we can help people that are dealing with things like this. and it's just don't grab the shovel and digging deeper. It's its lending, a helping hand, and just asking how they're doing or hey. You need a cough here. Little things like that can make the difference I think. You know the that's the point of our podcast. And why we call it the little things, it's those those small little minute occurrences and questions and conversations where where people make the difference where your friends family relationships people. Maybe that you've met in a restaurant or at school like it's, it just feels good to be looking after and to be talked to, and and asked questions like that and in order to do. Do that we need to do that for others, and it's about those little moments so I. I've enjoyed the conversations that we've had so far mentioned and this is. This is a big one giving up on on a father figure You know I'll ask him. It's here. You know what when you think of you know the Word Dad. You know you think of the word father what what comes to mind for you? Why I would say First Word that comes the Dad and the DAD's that I know and are very familiar with would be a calming presence. I think a security blanket, a safety net those kinds of things. They're the ones that when when the sea is rocky, they're the ones that are calming. The storm anytime that I call mild men and ask them a question I mean he just knows the answer to it and if he doesn't. he's GonNa, find it, but the one thing I really enjoy now at this stage in my life, you can tell the pure joy. that he has when he helps me like when he answers the question. When when I call, it's just by, and it's something simple and. I get that from him. He never tells me that, but I get it from. And it's. It's cool I. I can't wait to. Offer that to my daughter's when when I get that age. You know you said some there. That made me smile the they have the answers to everything. Isn't that something? Like when I asked my dad a question, and and perhaps several your listeners do the same. They just know everything you know whether it be a a car part you know something that they could listen to your car drive by in. Know what it is exactly you know. It's like they're all time. Mechanics or something, but you could ask him a question about in in any realm of life, and it just seems like they know the answer so that that kind of made me chuckle. I will say this and it really kind of diving into this, too which is good I guess that's kind of the goal of this whole thing anyway but. I remember. When I was in college, and I might have even been out of college and married. My mom saying like she's a little frustrated with my Dadan. The lack of guidance. He gave me and didn't help you. Just of did it on his own, and I like kind of looked at it and I'm like Mom Mike. He did he never wanted to burden anyone? He just wanted to get it done. He never wanted any help unless he needed it. And now he's the age where. He asks all the time, but when I was younger like just never did ask you know and he taught me a time, and I'm still learning, but as you continue moving forward. I just I was Kinda. Kinda taken back by that a little bit because I think that that. That is and we're going to talk about it a little later on. I mean that is one of our roles as a father's to teach our our sons and daughters kind of the way, and how life works and the little ins and outs to make things easier. And whether my mom thought so or not, I mean my dad did a great job. Yeah, and and I know robs done a good job. Mitch because you you turned out. You know okay so I. Think Your parents did a good job? Hey. Don't push it okay. kind of add on and piggyback a little bit there when when I think of. When I, think of Father in the Word Dad I think of just just a role model like my dad is my role model I think of the work ethic, and and responsibility, and you know Morales and core values that he lay down, and that have really just kind of paved the way for for my life in the way that I choose to live, you know it's based on the Guidance and principles that he lived by you know and before him. We've talked about my grandpa harvey on the little things before, too, but you know my dad followed the principles and core values that GRANDPA Harvey established so I just when I, when I hear the Term Father and dad I just think of. You know I think of someone who's responsible who has a set of core values? Who who loves in in cares, and just is the staple of of a family, an provides that that guidance and and my dad was everything and and more you know which which I was extremely fortunate to to have, and still do half but growing up with him. You know I wanted to be like him I, wanted to. To just have that that sense of purpose and work ethic in in passion towards my work, and and he kind of paved the way for me, so that's what I think of anyway. So I'M GONNA pose this year. When we give up. On something or someone in our lives as significant as a parent or relationship. What else does it impact? I mean like. Where else do we go with that? While to me matches right right in the question there, the word significant it's. It's a big deal when. When you don't have a father figure or you know in in general terms if you don't have a parent, figure one or the other or neither. It's tough and it really impacts other other stages of life. You Know I. Think of you know I'm trying to put it into perspective of when I was younger and I'm sure you do the same Mitch like you know we. We were fortunate enough, but we followed in our parents footsteps in our dad's footsteps and and. I don't I. Don't know if generally impact a whole lot outside of that because we always had someone to look after and and model ourselves after when you don't have that figure in your life when you don't have that role model, and and that person to to kind of follow in the footsteps if you will. We'll that sprinkles into other aspects of your life. You know you can talk about relationships. You can talk about friendships. School Sports work You know passion desire like whatever you want to you know, sprinkle in there. If you don't have. You know a role model that you're trying to follow after it, it's it's tough, and it's you know I think of mostly mentally and physically or excuse me mentally emotionally you know not having that is is kind of a mental burden, and Kinda brings you down, and with the anxiety and depression. That's going on. You know in the world right now. A lot of that is due to absence of parenting, and and and having that relationship in that responsible figure to look after so that's that's what I think of. What are your thoughts? Well! I'm probably going to piggyback on a lot of things, and maybe even repeat a thing or two but I think when something in our life that is constant that that we rely on I mean we've all got it whether it is apparent figure or or both parents or relationships in our life or our work, we have things that are constant in our life, and when we have something significant happen where something changes okay. You give up on someone someone leaves. Someone dies. A relationship ends. You get fired from your job. I think you lose a lot of confidence like you were kind of saying there. I think everything that we've instilled in that. We believe in, and that's right for us, and it's comfortable when that's pulled out from under us. I think we we start second guessing everything in our life things that we're used to things that are comfortable. I think we we second. Guess we don't really truly enjoy. The little things that that we appreciate so. I think that really does happen a lot. We lose trust. In people around us as well. When you when you put all your comfort, nor your security in all your trust in something, and it's gone. It's tough to to do that again. It makes us vulnerable. Therefore, we don't take risks. We don't step out of our comfort zone and really try to achieve things that are gonNA pushes forward because we've been hurt and I know we've talked about vulnerability a ton on this podcast, but I think this really hits home that it happens to us. And how are you going to respond to that and? You're in a deep hole. When something like this happens, and what makes you your character? What builds your character is? How are you going to pick yourself up? And that's a huge thing you know. How how are you going to pick yourself up? It's such a mental and emotional toll when you don't have that like when you were talking there Mitch, you brought up You know a sense of confidence or lack there of. Think about think about this kid in kids. You know all around the world where that don't have a parent or role model father figure to look up to when they look around them and they see their friends. Have that relationship and have that father figure. It's almost just like like the soul in is just being squeezed. You can feel your heart. Drop to your to your gut when you see that you know And in you're not fully developed as you know young children you know have so much development to be had you know mentally and and stuff in and when you see that around you, it's tough. It's really tough and strenuous, and can lead to a lot of things at such a young age, so it's it's got a huge huge impact, and it just makes it that much more important to to to try and form those bonds and form those relationships as early and often as you can. You know I wanNA Kinda. Touch on something you said there. When when you look at other people around you, the have those trusting relationships, and they can fall back on. We're taught at an early age. Jake's to be satisfied with what you have you know. Don't look at other people's things in their houses and be jealous of that. Be Happy with what you have. So we're. Where does that come into place? I mean like you've got one parent that solid that provides for you. But yet, you you want that I mean. Do you go back to what we were taught as kids to say like? Be Happy with what you got or do. You have a right to be upset and mad that you've only got that one that one parent. I think that's there's a little bit gray area there in a kind of flip the coin and and see what you think about this when. When hear that Mitch I think of? Playing the victim card and and kind of having that victim mentality. We touched on that in season one. which was a great season? If you get a chance to go back and listen, but. The victim mentality is a really hard place to be. And when you get stuck there, all you're doing is blaming others so to reference. Your Question Mitch when you're a kid you have you have a lot of growing up to doing a lot of developing to do? And you kind of you need some. You need some push. You need some assistance with that You know you're taught to. You Know I. Don't know if settles the right word, but appreciate what you have, you know your thoughts appreciate what you have and I think you should and I think that's important. But there's also a step in. There's also A phase or a period in life where you hit where you need to take on some responsibility and you need to form. Your own kind of sense of values, your own significance, your own foundation, and start making decisions that are better for you, you know you need to look out for number one so. Yes! I, think the you know having that that childhood, and that upbringing kind of having that role model like yes, you. You should want to feel some sort of satisfaction from that, but at some point you need to take charge. You need to to look out for number one. which is yourself, you know I actually wrote a post on this on his just Jake dot com. It's called if not you then who and Go take a look at that, but it's basically. Refers back to. You need to look out for number one. You need to make sure that you have everything aligned in. You make decisions that are best for you. And that's a completely different aspect than when you're growing up kind of missing that that father figure does that. Does that make a little bit of sensor mich or am I completely off? You. Do you have to focus on you what you have what you don't have in what you need to do to push yourself forward, you know find the resources to to find success in. Don't dwell on what you don't have, and you I mean I I really liked that I thought it added a lot to to that conversation that question, so, what does the lack of a dad or a parent figure due to us in our upbringing I guess what? I. Think you and I kind of live. You know the mayberry life like Sean, Cabal said in season one finale, but. You and I had parents that were that were supportive, pushed us to be to be great. People and I don't think you and I would be where we're out today without our parents. But what does the lack of a dad or apparent figure do us in our upbringing? While you're right Mitch, we were extremely fortunate and lucky to have that upbringing and when you when you don't have that. I, I just try and put it into the perspective of. Just not having someone to look up to and to to follow in their footsteps. and to me you see this all the time in in you probably more than me, being in the education and school setting a lot of times when when kids don't have that. That that figure that role model that they're modelling themselves anti under you know at such a young age I think they tend to gravitate towards what their friends are doing or like. We just touched on what others are doing. And the thing is if you're following. Kids of of similar ages and and Development and Having that that mental. I guess edge if you will you know at that age if you're following someone that that's similar to that, and maybe they're not going down the right path well. If you don't have a role model, someone that you're following going under while you're gonNA. Follow what your friends are doing. Right and if that tends to happen it could lead to a Lotta. Lotta bad places, and and I'm sure you see it in school settings you see it in in TV shows and movies all the time, but it's a real thing. It's a real thing. If you don't have that role model, you tended just kinda go the crowd and the crowd you know typically that you fall into isn't always heading in the right direction. In you see a lot of? Kids that don't know what they don't know. I mean you see it very clearly. that. They're missing this in their life or their missing that structure you know up a dad, mom? Grandparents siblings you just see that. Come out very much so. You see tendencies of these these students that are struggling. You see him gravitate towards the different people I mean I've had students that would misbehave because they wanted. Interaction with with a male, the only interaction they end, I remember one student very clearly They. They were in their spot if they were sitting in my office. You end up figuring that out and it's like well. That's why they're misbehaving is because they want to go see Mr. Eden I mean that negative attention in their mind is the only positive attention. They get from a male all day. And it's because I care about this kid and we had to kind of switch that gear, but It. It becomes very clear and that kid might not even have any idea that that's why they're doing what they're doing. But you see it so clearly from an outsider looking in and. I'm right with you, do but. I. Do want to say a quote. That I heard from a tedtalk authorities. Alva- is her name. She said strive to be the person you when you were younger. I. That is crucial. When it comes to this question, I think so many times. We fall back on what we know right so statistics are very high that when you're abused as a kid, you're going to grow. To Abuse Your Kids said that the likelihood is there I'm not saying it's going to happen, but it's much much more likely same with drug use I mean. If you see drug use alcoholism in the house. You're much more likely to do that. Right so these people can't. Can't dwell on what they had or what they didn't have either. They need to dwell on what they need it. That's how they get out of this Rut. It's not doing what they've seen or what they were not able to see. It's what they needed to be successful and that's with Ortis. Alvis said I love that quote Mitch. Where'd you find that Sucker at you know? I was just I got into this big thing with tax watched a ton of them in. It was actually. It was the wildest thing. It was some Gal from Iceland in Australia I. Don't even know the name of it, but her name. ELVA and it was it was a really shocking one. And at the end it's yet said strive to be the person you needed when you were younger and. kind of lived like that as in education now I kind of wear that quote on my sleeve and I. Of Act that way. I guess, yeah, no. I really enjoy that quote in in I think of it in terms Kinda just what we references a minute ago was. It. It's kind of like taking on a sense of responsibility. Right like be the person you needed. When you were younger like okay I didn't have in my life I didn't have that role model I didn't have that dad. Well, I can. I can be that you know again. We all have a choice. The choices ours we're always in control one thing, and that's us and I like it because it's kind of taking the sense of responsibility to to to be the best version of yourself, you know i. say that often mentioned. I truly mean it is. One of one of the meanings, reasons that were here is to be the best version of ourselves, and then to use that version to serve others. And when you talk about, you know being the person being the role model that you needed when you were younger I. Just I just think that's I. think that's big time and that's A. That's a good quote there I'm not GonNa lie and it's something to abide by I, really enjoy it. I look back on this because I, when I did this project with these students, cardboard confessionals a book, I wrote out and sociology class way released or ask students seven questions, and this just happened to be one of the questions. What is something you've given up on, but? With that I always put myself in their situation. And, giving up on my dad. 'cause many times in this conversation I. Think we assume that. When we give up on our dad, they're gone. They left. They're not even there. But that's not always the case either I mean we could give up on her dad, and they could be probably one of the most abrasive in our face figures. We have in our life. So what in the world could have happened to this relationship where you've given up on your dad? I it's not a light subject. Mitch but I kind of laughed. Because two things come to mind. one is responsibility again. The word responsibility I know that's came up a lot here, but when when I think of that, you know what in the world maybe could have happened. Being Apparent being a dad as you know, Mitch is is a lot of responsibility. You're literally taking care of another human being. which has a lot of responsibility tied to it and a lot of lot of men and a lot of people that are in that position. Don't want that amount of responsibility. They don't want that and a lot of times. They'll just kind of you know in a sense. Let their kids go or let them do their thing. And that that that sense of responsibility isn't there so when you know that could have happened potentially And the reason why I I kind of laughed early on is another thing I think of which you might get a kick out of it. Is the football movie Friday Night Lights? I'm sure you've seen it once or twice once or. So on Friday Night Lights, you've got the running back Don Billingsley, and his dad is. You know also graduated from that same. High School WanNa State. Championship there. and. To say the least, he puts a lot of pressure on his kid he's flaunting his State Championship Ring He's always wearing his lettermans jacket around, and he's putting so much pressure on his son to to to win the State Championship and to do the same thing he did, and when you ask that question Mitch. I thought about that because I think that's that's the case, a lot of times a lot of times. DADS and fathers trion. Trying in a way like live or relive their lives through their kids, you know they try and relive and reform what they went through into their kids, and it's tough to to see that in. Even say that because you know we were. We're the only one of us. You know. You need to let your kids live out their lives. They're. They're going to live a completely different life than you, but unfortunately. I think that's summoned something. That's pretty common, and maybe you can elaborate that you know you spend so much time in school in education, but that's just something that I thought of from the movie Friday Night Lights. I think it's a lot more common. Than, you, think which is a sad kennedy, l.. You just wish that you're there to support. The kids I to be honest with you. I don't think parents realize either. They don't they I. Know They don't because I've seen it and I I, don't I don't think it's. I WANNA I WANNA refer back to Friday night lights like Billingsley. His Dad cared about him. He did plain and simple loved him. But he just that's how we showed it. He didn't and he didn't think there was anything wrong with it. Because I think if good parents and a lot of these people are good parents. If they were able to see that they would change, they wouldn't do it. But they're just abrasive and they in it happens a lot in I. Think you get a lot of parents that'll live vicariously through their kids. You know with their successes and I think I took for granted what my parents did after games, and basically they're just like yeah Good. Game I guess you want. What are you? Are you hungry or? Good game and I played like crap you know. Do What did you? That'd be my response. Did you even watch the Game Oh? You don't? It's just a game Mitch okay. You know you got that a lot, but I was pretty competitive in highschool, but It happens a lot. Jake a lot. It makes me Chuckle Mitch, and perhaps you can remember the soul my post-game meal. Every single game of high school was a large chocolate milkshake. The size of my face like no matter. No matter the game. When I got home from that basketball game, there was a large chocolate milkshake. On on the living room table and Every single post game. Didn't change when he got to college. Perkins and you know they didn't make it you. They just bought it for you that time. That's right. Yeah, we used to go to games after Games and Mitchell and be the same thing, but. I? Mean you know similar to you, mich? We had that experience where. Our parents didn't try to to live. You know relive, I guess vicariously through us, they they let us do our thing and let us grow to to be into the people. We are today and we're super fortunate for that, but not everyone. Has that and you know again we don't. We don't know what happens to this relationship. You know we're just trying to extend the conversation a bit, but. It's something where I hope. Maybe that that's repairable. You know we've talked about the power of positivity Mitch and Season Two and I've always been optimistic person. There's. You know we only have one go around. Here and in relationships are. Are, something that that I take pride in and a Lotta people should in in their important. You know it's the people that get us through life and. If this is repairable. If there's something that they can go back to. If there's something that can be done I. I sure hope that that maybe this this individuals is looking towards something like that I'm going to go down a rabbit hole here and it's so tough to talk about that stuff when you get older. We all make mistakes you know. My parents made mistakes I certainly made mistakes growing up. It's so hard to bring that stuff back up and own up to that though, but I think I think it really heals things. Through people struggled to talk about their. Their past and the mistakes they've made especially when it comes to raising their kids. They just do and I. You know at the end of the day. Regardless of they made mistakes I I appreciate what my parents did for me and I mean they mean the world to me and I've learned from some of the mistakes they've made you know and I'm GonNa make mistakes raising my daughters and. Just to sit down and be able to talk about them and who knows it's easier said than done, but it it. It's tough to talk about those things. It is and and I understand that and you know again. We don't know the situation here. It could be long gone or literally something could have happened that morning at breakfast you know, and then that kid brought that emotion into school and just happened to write it that day I. Mean you never know But. Yeah, it is tough to talk about those things, but but at the same time that that's part of our job. I think Mitch with little things is one of our goals is to literally further conversations, and have some the deep conversations, and not saying that that's GonNa, fix everything, but it certainly puts it out there and like you said could potentially He'll something that's that's happened. You know I don't know Jake if I brought this story up or not. I'm pretty sure I have, but it's. It's one that needs to be shared. Because I think it shows that we don't know. What the people around us are going through I got an email on my book. cardboard confessionals at gmail.com. and. It was I got I get quite a few of those emails that when they get done reading the book they they reflect on something. Something hit a nerve with them. They can relate to it. And I got one about giving up on my dad if I told this one or no. I. Don't believe so well good well. It's not a great story but I think it sheds a lot of context on what we're going over so anyway they read this and said you know I can relate to giving up on my dad and goes on to tell the story you know. My Dad was the strongest person in my life. could do anything. They never missed anything. He was super supportive he he was the best, and you know what. He was even better GRANDPA. An hour and a half out of his way to go to ballet show for ten minutes, and he just was unbelievable. He was my rock. He was everything. Until you know at that time about three years prior whatever when I got that email until three years ago. My world came crashing down. I found out that my dad raped my oldest daughter. was so now this person that email. He's like so now what? He was the one I turned to. He was the one that any thing that would be going in my life. He'd be the first one to respond. And now this. It turns your life upside down and I say this. I bring this up when I go out and speak because. This goes to show you like. These are the people that you walk next to Walmart? These are the people that you sit next to a ball game. These are the people that you go to work with every single day. They're going through this stuff. And what are you GonNa? Do to help them? What are you? What are you going to do and? You know so. That I think that really shed some light on this. I mean that is I mean hey, you're giving up on your dad. After that right, it can be something super, small or something super big, and the context really plays a role on I mean. It's pretty heavy story man I still try to wrap my head around it and you just you take the time to appreciate everyone's strength because. That person that wrote that their ability to get out of bed every day, and still raise their kids to the best of their abilities. That is a strong human being. That's an extremely heavy story and I'm I'm struggling to find words to even. To even. I guess put into perspective or comment on, but. The strength that is around us is something to to be applauded. Even though we don't see it all the time, it is going on around us and there's a lot of people who are in a lot of tough situations. And I think it's just it just makes it that much more important in meaningful to to look out for people and reach out and ask questions and show them that you care. Show them that you love them. Like be there for people and that might be kind of A. I guess maybe a generalized term. Be there for others, but But when you do it, it's it's just it's like it's got this spot in your heart where you know you're doing the right thing for someone else and I. Just I just hope that. at least I try and live my life that way I know you do and and I know several of our listeners do, but I hope we continue to do that to to look out for others. Because there's some there's some stories, and there are some battles going on out there Mitch, and if there's if there's any way that we can help and. And we can lend a helping hand I certainly hope that we're doing so don't assume that the people around your okay. Just don't I mean that's a bad assumption. know that they're okay. I think that's what we strive to do. Don't assume know that the people around you are taking care of and their needs are being met and if they're not. Be that person and I think we talk about a lot. The five most influential people in your life and what you can do to be that person for someone else and I think that's one of them. Constantly knowing that the people around you are taking care of and I think that will go a long way and I I hate to share that that heavy one, but I think it's an eye opener. We're GONNA have a lot of conversations in season three like that Jake season three's a doozy to say the least there's a lot of conversation. A lot of rabbit holes, and a lot of I think deep meaningful. Purpose driven conversations are going to be had in an extended from ours. Mitch and I'm looking forward to it. Before the end we revisit past episodes and include reviews and questions from our audience. We also read a few shots as well. Comments from our listeners are brought to you by Alan and Connie, Fan and foundation, which was created to enhance the quality of. Of Life for children, thank you for the support of the little things. Jake, get any shoutouts anything you want to share I do I. Have a quick one here, my good friend, Stephanie and I were talking just a little bit about kind of my journey, a little bit with with the little things podcast and and my website blog is just jake dot com. And it's. It's kind of funny because you know. Sometimes we talk, and we get into conversations Mitch where. It's just like we don't even know where it came from, but we get on a story or we get on a topic and then. Precisely, what we talked about is what someone who's listening needed to hear that day. You know we've we've had that happen before we get a get an email and it's like this message just stuck with me so so deeply. It's like exactly what I needed to hear that day, and and she said something I'll quarter. That kind of made sense Mitch for us is. You know when we get in these conversations. They just they just happen. Right and things happen at the right time, and we just express feelings in that moment and she goes. That's when you're being spoken to, so you can then speak to others. And I thought that was pretty powerful like. You know we we get on rambles and stuff. Mitch, but we touch on things that just come to mind. It's as if we were supposed to talk about in a sense if you know what I'm saying and then to have her say. When you're being spoken to. So you can then speak it to others'. I thought those pretty powerful fantastic. I. Mean It really is Thank you for sharing that and to our listeners and we love. We love hearing that stuff. I think it it. Really. Fuels are fire I. Mean we got plenty of fire. You Ain't. GonNa put it out. Thanks Stephanie. Appreciate your time and sharing that that's that's awesome I got one from my sister-in-law jody. Commented on day callous and just I mean. We've heard great things about that that episode, and how down to Earth is, and just he's done a lot. He's accomplished a lot, but talking to the guy. You'd never know it and. What's what's really cool is those when we have guests on our show? Those people. Bring up a lot of conversations that we've had in prior episodes, and we comment on them, and she kind of just like I. Catch up on some of this stuff, so it's it's Kinda that way. We've got listeners that are religious about it and the listen to every episode order. We've got some that'll only listen to the guest speakers. We got some that'll jump all over the place when they got time and. No matter what it's fantastic, we appreciate the support. Jake! How can people get a hold of us? Yes again. We really really appreciate the support. Mitch and I. Love What we're doing here with the little things and you guys make it go so continued to reach out. Our email is the little things, dot, mich and jake edge email dot, com We're making a big push for our facebook page right now. The little things podcast go ahead and like our page. We've got some big news coming up that we're really really excited to share with you. Guys so stay tuned there and then just be sure to leave a rating and review we're up to. quite a few five star ratings on Apple. Again you can listen on on Apple android. spotify whichever device you're, you're listening to Be Sure to subscribe in and give us a rating and review our last comments are brought to you by Lake region golf course near Lake Poncet in South Dakota. If you're looking for a great experience of course, awesome food or fantastic company, look no further call the clubhouse at six, zero, five, nine, eight three. Three five four, three, seven for more details, Lake region golf course play. Relax enjoy jake. I want you to kind of give a shout out to your blog. And we talked about it a little bit there. Though but you know we talk about your blog and kind of what's on it. How CAN PEOPLE GET Get in touch with that sure. I appreciate that Mitch. the blog is just it's just jake dot com again jake. Jake Dot, com, it's just a kind of a personal development and self improvement blog in most of my writings are based on life experiences that I've gone through, and some of those I've shared on the little things. Some I I have not yet, but I I take every day events in everyday experiences that I go through, and that I've gone through in the past and just try and learn from them and try and take something from them. Them and the way I express. That is through writing. I've always enjoyed writing and and having a place to kind of put my thoughts and ideas and such, and that's kind of what my website is again. It's just it's just Jake Dot com you can subscribe I send out emails and post you know ideally quite a few times during the month, so would love to have you part of the community that we have over there. Are Thanks Jake tune in for the next episode. The question what is something you've given up on? The answer to that question. Making everyone happy. This is Mitch and jade signing out. This was a special presentation of the little things by Mitch and Jay For more details on the PODCAST or the project CHECKOUT MITCH DASH RE DOT COM. It's just JAKE DOT COM or purchase cardboard confessionals on Amazon. And remember the first step to helping someone in need is understanding and appreciating what they are going through. Thank you for listening.
Dear Thrift Stores: We Love You, But Please Stop
"Thrift stores? How do I love thee? Let me count the ways we love drifting so much. We've dedicated an entire podcast talking about thrift and sustainability, but every now and then thrift stores do things that make us scratch our heads and wonder why they do them. So today's episode we talk about some of the things that we wish thrift stores would do differently keep listening episode twenty nine of allow us to re thrift produce. Ourselves. The fall season is upon US pumpkin spice Latte taste cozy sweatshirts and voting you betcha right now I'm rocking my voting period sweatshirt custom made by Azis fat don't crack shop does that name sound familiar to you because it's our coast here on the podcast Shannon Shannon Design Apparel for the whole family to help spread the word about the importance of voting this fall right now you can get free shipping with the Code Dina's days. That's D. I. N. A. S. D. A. Y. S. head to oetzi dot com slash shop slash fat don't crack and get your voting gear today. Welcome back. She an alright today we're talking about something. Pet peeves. Oh, that's everybody's favorite. So. Here's the thing we love you thrift stores so much you rock our world so much your liquor mom and dad, but just like when you have family sometimes they do things that really annoy you like our mom and dad like you're a little sister dances in front of the TV. Or when you're parents teach you how to do something you've been doing the same way for the last forty years. So just like family thrift stores do things sometimes I wish they would do differently. Yeah. Just a little bit differently. So this idea came about actually from somebody on instagram one day posted a pair of book ends that are shaped like acorns that I- thrift it and they weren't that cheap shannon. They were six dollars. That's a lot and I don't really need book ends. I. Bought them to Resell I thought wow. Somebody would really like a pair of acorn book and they're really cute. They are fun but it's definitely not a six dollar purchase I would've made for myself and then. I took him home and as I was getting ready to photograph them to list them, I took the masking tape off that they had so that they keep them connected and together and it appealed all of the material off like the color and everything everything it was just it was damaged. It's damaged. There's no there's no fixing it unless I painted six dollars for damage acorn. So I posted something on instagram and I was like PSA thrift stores please stop using masking tape and shipping tape to tape things together. It's it me crazy. The same thing happened to me when I spent twenty five dollars. That's a lot Oh my gosh that hurts that's a lot hurts me and my. It was beautiful. It is beautiful and it's like a divider, a room divider and it's just gorgeous in that. We even looked it up in the retail price was like over one hundred dollars worth it. Right. Then again at home and I take the sticker off. Any literally peeled off the pains like it was black it had black paint on wood and he took a packing tape packing tape to put the amount on it. And it just peel right off. Oh my gosh it hurt my heart and then and then to repair it in your repairing something, he didn't WanNa spend twenty five dollars on it in the first place and I realized I sound really cheap but I don't care like when you're at the third story, you don't expect to spend tons of money twenty, five dollars. A lot of the time is how much budget is for like the purchase. Yeah. So so I, get that I get that and a lot of people felt that way I. got flooded with messages saying, yes, I wish they would stop doing that and and then people started. Listening all these different things and one reader was like this would be a really fun podcast episode. You know things we wish thrift stores would stop doing things we wish they would do differently and so I thought both of us thought that was a really fun idea and so we have a list of five things that we wish they would do differently but we still love you one hundred percents. So love so much love just team good. Well, then I'm always like well is the price you pay for going to second hand store you know forgetting a good deal sometimes, you have to have the paint peeled off of a pair of. acorn book ends now I don't agree. So we really talked about number one number one is taping housewares with masking tape shipping tape that clear tape us. To, send a box like a package. Yes. Is really harsh on a lot of different textures and materials right and there's stickers out there. You can put on anything appeals off of anything in doesn't take the material with it like why weren't we using those guys probably because it's expensive okay. Then can we use like a something like a writing utensil that you can easily clean off the issue was that taping them so that the pair can stay together right so it'll be like bookends. Okay your case was different. Yeah? I don't know why they use tape in that case in on the room divider that was not necessary. I don't know but like in my case, the book ends I get that you don't want them to get lost in the mix I. Actually prefer when they keep things together that way but maybe like use a rubber band or maybe us. Like the painter's tape, the blue tape that so not harsh on any surface, right? Exactly. And then, and then if it is an issue where it's like, we can't afford to buy a bunch of painter's tape for every single thing that comes in here of an easy paired up can we use string or it's GonNa be extra work and I know that that might be the issue that like everybody doesn't have five more minutes because two girls on podcast decided to complain. Look. When we're talking about things like reusing items like Thir- getting a lot of garbage t shirts in their can they cut up a bottom of a t shirt in the news? It s string you're saying, let that's extra work. Yes. Realize. Yeah. Very sustainable sustainable that they're going to let where's there's a lot of things end up in the trash. Because it can't be changed into something else and we use some of those objects that Tyson stuff up I. Don't know what's kind of innovative. We have to look at different ways to do things, and then after you've gotten used to, it will take less time in less time in until you're back to write that piece of tape was and I think. The masking tape work sometimes like sometimes I've I have not had issues shoes I've ever had shoes taped together before. in some cases, it doesn't matter. But like I think, maybe it's a case by case basis where you're like, this might really peel the paint on. Yeah. So I get that it's probably a cost saving thing but I like the idea of being open to other ways of taping it or maybe not taping everything. Okay another one that came up so much on instagram and it was one that I had even suggested other people is stop using staples. On the tags. All this makes me. So nuts when you buy something really nice and then there's like now you have two holes in your shirt because they decided to use staples than we using ball what in the world is happening and then you're like hoping like the water in when you wash it like you get hot enough that it'll like Meld the fabric together and you won't have holes anymore. So that and a lot of times they'll do it on. The Tag, and then when you buy like a really nice designer item s you want a hole in the tag and I know a lot of drives resellers crazy too because you could find some really expensive brand and the tag is kinda ruined. I mentioned this before I worked at a dry cleaner, all throughout high school and college. We used to staple the tag like the dry cleaning tag on the garment tag and customers complain all the time. And then we switched to safety pins. Okay. Oh, that's a great idea. because. Well, my first instinct is, why are we stapling when they have access is really cool guns, but it's cheaper. It's cheaper to stable safe depends probably cheap to. That's a work safety hazard. Okay but I feel like there needs to be. Planning to happen here I totally prefer the barbs but the that yes, those are. No I have no issue with those. Whatsoever Ya I but I do think it's probably cheaper to do staples barbs but I have no factor back that up whatsoever. We're just giving giving little and. Advice you take take. All right. What's next? There's nothing worse than getting like fiesta ware or something that you're really pumped about the brand and then you go to. The two dollar mark in. It's there forever because they use a sharpie what there shouldn't be sharpies behind the scenes Anna through smart let there should be no access for anyone to pick up a sharpie. Any point what? Makes me crazy. Then you start getting like all weird stuff under your sink out trying to get. Off every cleaning supply I felt like the straight up chemist more. What can I mix together? Let me get my safety goggles. And nothing has worked and I don't care what people say yes. A lot of times they use the marker you can rub off. Yeah totally. Agree. But there are lots of instances where it was literally a Sharpie Yeah I. Don't understand it I. Don't know where they coming from and you know what? Just? Makes me bonkers not just the permanent marker? Let's say you use the marker that's supposed to rub off. If you do that on Leather Soles, which leather soled usually equates to expensive designer shoes. There is nothing I have tried everything nothing will take that. That's so annoying and I'm sure they're thinking who cares it's on the ground. But when you like you know ground to you and you're walking and walking off at some point but if you're reselling it, it matters because it looks so junkie look if you're crossing your legs. Z. The thrift store price tag on the bottom of your shoe especially when it's like a pair of two hundred dollar shoes that you found at the thrift store, I'm dead serious. Like today I found a pair of Jeffrey Campbell boots and they have leather soles and God knows if I'm able to take the marker off yet, let's just knowing it drives me crazy leather soles especially, and it'll say on the bottom leather sole what's your suggestion? Use a sticker use a stick you the sticker it's leather soles US price sticker input on Seoul put out care where he put it. Yeah. Just don't use a marker on leather soles here, and then it just sucks like that's great call something you know and then now it's the. I don't know I mean I realize you can still sell it just doesn't look Nice. And even wear it just doesn't look as Nice Yeah Yeah it is it's not the end of the world it is on your foot on the bottom of your foot, but that's not the point. And I yeah and there are a lot of resellers out there and I think that's just kind of the reality now like. Is Very Popular and it's not going anywhere and select. Let's kind of work together. You know we want to buy this stuff, but I'm not buying it if I can't take the price tag off of it. Yeah. Okay. What's next for you? Okay. So this is a new thing for me that I've just found to drive me completely insane because you know for four seconds I decided to open up an se shopping I think of rb like had a clearance sale. But I'm with their store and I'm looking at all these like vintage dishes. So I want to know what's the brand like what's going on with this? Is there a year on what's up like is this TJ maxx or is it a fine like because you know sometimes I pick stuff up. And then it's like Yvonne like Oh man so Lately, the new thing is putting the sticker on the name, the name brand. So like I flipped over say like it's like a piece and I'm like Oh this Spca store Oh, just tell me how much it is when I look at it. Are you kidding me look I wanNA know is where is in a knockoff right? Then I try to peel it back Dry to steal right really just WanNa know what is this I never thought of that one before. But it has happened to me now that you say that yeah in like you could just stick him on the side or run on the inside or just like down little bit. Could they snap like right there. So they're just like you worked for that. So this is mostly on housewares. Yes. Where it's like when you do start to peel that price tag off, it breaks in how he had. A nice. Peel nothing. No, it is. Not a nice feeling. Yeah. Yeah, it'll. The solution is don't put it on the brand know. Especially, like then the person has to bring it up and then it's all walking. You're trying to figure out how much it actually was because it's all messed up because you ripped it off. Yeah, and then they're probably getting annoyed with you because they knew who's trying to rip it off. You know just you know the whole thing is just annoying. I, wonder if that happens because there are it's like it's like an efficiency thing like every the price tag on the bottom of everything. and think about luckily, this is a good brand or whatever looking. I'm really trying to be sensitive to the fact that it is probably what we know. It's a lot of work in the back room and I I'm definitely trying this is all. Fun and Games and we're just joking around but it is a lot of work back there and I've never worked in the backroom of a thrift store. So I can't really relate. So I'm guessing things like this happen because of efficiency. Yeah but it is. It does end up causing maybe a little more of a hassle because like you said, you're trying to peel it off. You're trying to see what the brand is. You take it up front then the thing doesn't have a price tag on it. Then they have to do a price check and then sometimes they won't sell it to you and I mean none of that sufficient Ian I would have bought this one their stores at recently I would about a lot more. I would have went and got a cart all the cool stuff I saw. But once I figured out how hard it was appeal off one sneaking sticker I was like yeah the one day on by and I'm not doing that anymore. Yeah. So the look yeah, it's efficient to slap him on the bottom but it can also be efficient to slap him on the side yeah. You know like just or we're just use one of those like I. I think they used to use these with the US anymore but the rub off Penn but it's like chuckle penn is like just use those again like a silver pattern. Just. Do it that so easy I can. Why can wipe that off when I'm Washington Washington anyway because in the sticker is still pain 'cause then you gotta get Goo gone out to get off sticky off off before you put it in the dishwasher like it's just. It is a lot of steps I. Still See that Silver Marker a lot but they don't always use it like I I don't I don't know what the processes I really don't and I wish they would use the silver one on the leather soles because that one actually rubs off sometimes hey, but the black marker does not no one's worse I had never even thought about the sticker thing before because you you you shop a lot more housewares than I do but I now that you say that I've totally been in that situation that's annoying an the last thing that we wished. Source would do differently is to stop pricing things so high yeah it it kills me sometimes like I get it. You guys are making money and then a lot of times too. I get a little bit sad because I think about and I realize like our roads different everything's changed and whatever and not even in this moment. But just like money's genes are dollars last like Blah Blah Blah. Blah. Blah. But like just thinking of the cool score, you could find back in the ninety s like that literally is possible anymore like you might be able to find something. Cool but it's really Isn't as prevalent as it one like it is picked through in pick through to go to different locations it's picked through to be set at higher retail marks and the day it was like all these purses I don't care five dollars. Yeah. It's just not like that anymore now all the name brands were pulled out I. Don't think they did that back in the day and you could have like that really cool score and now you can. Find that really cool score but it's not going to be five dollars. It's going to be twenty five dollars and it just I don't know it's just part of me. It really hurts if you look at it logically and you're like, okay, this person was four hundred dollars and you're gonna get for twenty-five just be happier I sure twenty, five bucks you know. But I'm looking at it very base like whiny Brat level and I'm just like. For. Five dollars yeah yeah, and I think I think it's a two way street I hear you on both ends I think on one hand times have changed and not all thrift stores get stuff for free. Some thrift stores have to buy their their their merchandise from organizations and things like that. So yet the landscape has is different. It's not the same secondhand seen that it was twenty. Years ago and companies and nonprofits have to keep up with time but I also totally agree with you that that thrill of finding the score, the way that we used to is not the same anymore. It's there. You have to work harder to find it and be. It's also going to be a lot more expensive than it ever was and see like you said it's filtered so like. Things are pulled. Things are behind the counter. Now things are going online. Now, it wasn't just like you into the thrift store and it was just you know open season you just found whatever we're whenever on the rack right right. In insect we understand 'cause like online didn't exist in so that we get it that would be like a missed opportunity for Arthur stores, but it just it just would say it it's a little bit it is and I guess my issue is that I don't care that they increase prices I really don't because if I owned a business. I would increase my prices over time as well. That's just things go but I think two things bother me about that is that we don't WanNa lose sight of the fact that a lot of families really need to shop at thrift stores to support their families not everybody's doing it because it's trendy not everybody's doing it because it's fun and mainstream and instagram makes it looks cool. People really need to get stuff for their families and they can't win a t shirt for a year. Old boy is costing fifteen dollars. It's completely unreasonable now and again, not author stores are doing this I think in our area some are more expensive than others and some you can still go and buy stuff for your entire family. So that's one thing that bothers me is that. We don't want to lose sight of the fact of of the purpose that that these thrift stores can serve for families in need and second of all the thing that bothers me about the increasing prices is that sometimes it's not even worth that price tag in some cases, these Jeffrey Campbell boots today they were marked up and I was like Gotcha no problem I see why you? Did. That like that was fair that was a fair asking price. Okay. Considering everything else that's happening in the thrift landscape now but in cases all see things like this is a target purse. Yeah. This is a target purse that was probably on clearance at target not talking about new goods I'm talking about used like mixed in with their stop that's marked up to twenty dollars won't. And I think what happens in those cases is that the person pricing again, these are just human beings back. They're trying to do their job so I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but I think sometimes it's just the person pricing at that point in time and I'm like. No. Or. Like an under armour t shirt that you can get brand new at Kohl's for your kid twenty five dollars. That's that's. Ridiculous. So it's just like, all right. Let's let's come up with a system that actually makes sense like the designer stuff go for it. Market up Tory burch bag market up I'm game for that. But some of this other department store mall brand stuff families need that stuff exactly like if European store exactly the same price thin. Clearance at target or wherever then why am I at their store? Yeah and the argument is, Hey, I would rather you buy this at the thrift store than buy new right within like you're saying it's the same price that will navy brand new. It's the same price at a brand new. Why would I buy US right because? Yes, you can go buy it at old Navy brand new, but the idea is to stop buying new but then you have people who were like it discourages them from from doing it. Yes. Yes. So I, think like. Online on this is we understand where you're coming from. We understand that it's not the nineties, but we need some consistency. Yeah. So I have a bonus pet peeve. I'm sure be sure that they're listening. We Love You I've dedicated my entire creative career to supporting you. So please remember that. Helps. Okay. So something that really gets a minor is if I go into a thrift store and I can't go to one section, but it's all the store. So for example, if I go in. Shoes are just on top of the racks in the whole place. So I have to walk around and look for shoes in the Nice. All those are cute shoes. Are they my size? No idea because there's no, they're not. They're not in sections of sizes they're not in sections of types they're not in section of men, women, children like it's just Willy Nilly, all over the place and I just decided that moment that I'm not going to be looking for shoes today I need to walk in in if. I'm looking for shoes go to this shoe section look at all the shoes a lot of times they're nice enough to even put him in size sciences. Then I can just look at the sizes a lot of times they'll put him in colors and I can look at which colors I'm looking for like I think the mind of thriftier needs to see things in categories like I just think that's the way we work and when they're just all over store I'm just like, okay that's not happening yes. Oh, I. AM nodding so much because I think the idea of doing that of having shoes on top of Iraq, for those who can't picture at picture like. A. Rack of clothing that kind of hits to like about your chin or your face, and then on top of that rack is where all the shoes are. So you've got like shirts shoes on top, and the idea is that it's on every single rack right throughout the store. But the idea is that it forces you go through every single aisle. That's that's the idea of keeping you in the store not to do that has the complete opposite effect on me because for so many reasons that I could have a whole episode on like sometimes I only WanNa thrift choose that day I only have ten minutes to. Go in and not go up and down every single aisle. Then my other question is, how can people in wheelchairs reach those shoes good woman yet, and how was that? How is that accessible? Not at all that's so unfair. That's a really good one. Didn't even think of that. 'cause you I'm short I'm four eleven. Okay. I. Can I literally cannot it's not at my eye level I cannot see those shoes I have to stay on my tippy toes to see them. So I was thinking if I was sitting in a wheelchair, how do you reach them? Yeah that's not fair at all. Yeah. So we gotTA stop that. Done it doesn't make any sense to me. It doesn't. Okay. To Okay and I think that there's a reason why thrift stores do this and we kinda talked through it if something isn't priced, they won't sell it to you. Yeah. That drives me nuts I think it's because it has to go through the process in the back like I get that I get that. But as a thriftier thinking about it stresses me out someone fair I've had to beg before. I know I'm please please just sell it to me sounds to me like no no, we have to go to the back. and has to go back out on the floor and then have to come back the next day. All all stores have different policies. I've been stores where you've had to come back the next day and I've gone back and it was gone of course, and in some cases, the saw desperation in my face and they were like fine and then they go to the back and they pull some number out of thin air they're like hundred and fifty dollars. Final take it I'll take it stop playing games with me you. See in that moment, that's my feel like manager should be able to handle that situation come on they have before they have I mean I'm trying to be funny but like there were instances where they're like, okay let me send this back to the manager and the manager comes back. To me but I've been rejected before. I I've been with you when you yeah before just seems ridiculous. I think a manager should be able to do that and it stresses like why can't you just have a process for when it happens because it's going to happen because things get missed and whatever. But if it goes on the floor and there's no price on it can't because. We know it's going to happen. Can we just have a plan in that moment in it not be I can't sell it to you but like let's just yeah up with something and as you're talking right now I'm thinking maybe a reason why and I've never worked in retail. So some of the stuff there's probably reasons that I, don't understand but I'm thinking it's to avoid theft. Like somebody could have ripped the tag off and said, this doesn't have a tag on it. How much is it, and then it would it would have been marked twenty dollars. Then hoping that you'll come across a manager that says Oh that's ten dollars. Yeah. That's true. So and I'm sure that happens all the time for those tags are easy to rip off and so. Think or you know you rub a tag on a price tag off of a house where or something I think that's probably the major reason why but I agree with you some type of policy that doesn't require me to come back. Yeah. Like for you to turn me away as a customer when because those those that range of emotions that you feel your holy cow, I cannot believe I just found this. God. The. Price Tag you're freaking out. You're sweating, and then they tell you know like in that moment, you can have a full carton be like I'm fine anything one, hundred percent high. Percent I will walk out because it's kind of a buzzkill is it really is and I just feel like in business you never wanna turn a customer away. Resolves right no no, they're not. They should be. So. Do you have any more I've one that's one that I thought of and I feel like I've talked about this before but and I'd like to add that I think a lot of stores are doing a lot better plus size with plus size clothing if I go in and you have a plus size section in, it's literally to be like I'm over it. Yeah. So over it. Yeah. So I've noticed that if you. Do not have a plus size section in Utah include me in everything. So I'm included in shirts and it just keeps going in this size. There's actually a lot of times when you go into stores they have plus I section it starts extra-large don't extra large just put the extra that new. The next is up next to extract fork whatever you know does pull them up there so I can go through and I can determine Extra is going fit in. Yes. He likes. Is GonNa fit me in the situation. Like don't put me in a little too fi spy like let me be a part of the whole pass. Yes I love that because I think a lot of thrift stores are thinking the opposite. I think they're doing it to feel like we're being inclusive. Section, but actually, it has the opposite effect right because you feel so constricted. Yes and then you book through those you know fifteen twenty things in an exit but a Lotta Times people are putting things back in weird SPA Italy a lot. We all know that no sizes the same in every brand like I have found. So many more options when a store includes me in the whole store. In instead of just putting me in a corner when you put me in a corner and I'm just looking at these two feet of things like I just am done with clothes and I just move onto houseware very discourage it is and but like if I can go to all of these different areas and like look at all, you know through the whole store and feel like everybody else. Always. Find more nobody puts baby to coroner. Couldn't wait for you. Nude. But. It's so true because a one X. Two X that they're not all the same. To you can easily fit into an extra larne and the size means nothing but at the same time, it means everything right you're more likely again from a business standpoint more likely to shop and buy things more likely to pick more things up when stores started doing that more I sorta by workload. Yes, and I think they're just tells you the are there. It's just the way that they show them to me. Yes. Pick them out. You Know Yeah Yeah. That's that's really cool and. You know my whole stance on this has been. If thrift stores can't as relates to plus size clothing if thrift stores have ability to source more plus is. Do. So you know whether if you buy clothes or if you're buying liquidations from different department stores always keep plus is at the top of your list it needs to be filled. The gap needs to be filled. There's not a lot of plus sized donations coming in. So if you can bring new goods in or something, that's one way thrift stores can help solve the problem. I. Totally agree well, now here I am stepping off of my soapbox. We love you. Yeah. So with that said, if you do have questions with pricing or other things, you can always go to them. You can always talk to a manager nicely and they're always really willing to work things out I. Think it's a two way street and stores are always open to that feedback. I things you art everyone happy Thrift Dang don't let these pet peeve. Stop you from going to support your local thrift stores stay safe and where your masks piece. Thanks for listening to allow us to re thrift produce ourselves. For episode, show notes go to Dina's days dot com slash podcast, and let us know what your biggest takeaway was from this episode by going Instagram and finding at Dina's days and at thrift reduce podcast we'll see you next time.
027: My Top 12 Reasons Why I Hate CrossFit, Version 2.0
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of Fatherhood in the twenty first century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus all. Today's episode features a classic doofus. Dad posed from twenty thirteen the top twelve reasons why this forty seven year old hates cross fit? Today, we're taking the way back machine back to September twenty thirteen at that time Holly Ni- were three years into our cross fit journey. Have you heard across fit? It's a fitness program or platform that launched in the mid to thousands, and by the early twenty tens became wildly popular across the globe a real phenomenon in the fitness industry. Across fit is a very high intensity workout program using free weights in bodyweight exercises that is done by groups of people in a cross fit gym or box all at the same time. When we lived in Murphysboro. Tennessee. One of our neighbors opened a cross fit box one of the first in the area. In cokes my wife Holly into trying it out. At this time I was not on board at all. No interest the idea of. Doing something called a burpee held no appeal to me. But after holly became enamored with the whole thing became super fit and essentially shamed me into doing it. I became hooked on cross fit. But I never really loved it like Holly. I really loved it being over. then. It was great. I guess I just loved the destination, but holly loved the destination and the journey. So being the smart Aleck that I am I wrote this blog post as a silly tongue in cheek testimonial for cross fit expecting no more than a few family members to read it however about five months after its publication something happened. Somehow this thing got shared I guess on a national cross fit page. And then I had my first and only experience with something of mine truly going viral. During the second week of January twenty fourteen this blog showed up on practically every cross fit website on earth and I'm not exaggerating. I received hundreds of emails and comments usually from older people that I had inspired, which was both touching an hilarious because I was mostly just trying to be funny. It was nuts anyway about a year. After writing this post, our life circumstances changed and we were forced to give up our crossfire membership thus changing me from a goodwill ambassador of cross fit to an impostor. Even, after we had stopped doing cross fit holly used our newfound fitness to run obstacle courses start talking and ultimately achieved a bucket list dream of trekking to Mount Everest base camp in Nepal. We even launch the only Himalayan trekking company headquartered in the southeast United States hobnail tracking company, and have provided that adventure for nearly two dozen Americans since twenty eighteen. Now, it is highly unlikely that any of that would have happened were it not for our introduction to cross fit ten years ago? So I will always be grateful for that. So without any further ado, let's get into the way back machine. Head. Back to twenty thirteen in revisit the top twelve reasons why this forty seven year old hates cross fit? Here we go. After nearly three years in I. Have a love hate relationship with cross fit. It's mostly hate. The majority of my forty seven years were blissfully cross fit free and I lived out my days happy and free of the DRID associated with upcoming workouts and the soreness associated with pass workouts. It was all good. Except for the whole fat week, undisciplined shape, crappy quality of life part of it, and then my do-gooder wife showed me into it because she wanted to lose weight and look and feel better. Kicking and screaming I went lost fifty pounds and had to listen to an incessant stream of I told you so's She's now one of those annoying people who gushes on and on about how much he loves cross fit and couldn't live without it. I'm not one of those. People. What I love about cross fit can be summed up quickly. I love it the second, the wide or working out of the day. Is Over? Everything up till then sucks. So with all that said, here are the top twelve reasons in no particular order why this forty seven year old hates cross fit? Number twelve, the trainers tick me off. I've had several of them and they're all the same first of all. They're all built like Greek gods and goddesses. Be They always act like they care about me in are all concerned with my welfare though I suspect it's an elaborate put on like the moonwalk. Thirdly, they never seem to buy any of my perfectly good excu reasons why I can't do something or complete a wide. The fact that I could be my current trainers, dad has an earn me one modem of respect or sympathy what's with these people? Number eleven the posting of the Wad. Every morning, my trainer post the WAD on facebook and for some stupid reason I read. This is around six thirty, a m I work out at five thirty PM. So using my fingers to do the math that gives me eleven hours to dread the WAD. I can do it driving while playing candy crush on my phone working sitting on the pod giving a work presentation just anywhere. I'm become quite proficient at dreading the WAD and trying to figure out ways not to go to the box number ten my conscience. There are wads where I really truly believe that if I tried to do one more, pull up, my arms will actually fall off. Or that my bleach skeleton will be discovered under the bridge at the four hundred meter mark because I decided that the run back to the box what we call across Jim was too much trouble and it was easier and more comfortable to go ahead and die there. It would be simple just to cheat and not complete my reps or rounds, but for some reason I rarely do. Don't get me wrong I might accidentally cheat rep or two here or there, but I seem incapable of really letting myself off the hook. It may be that I'm afraid the crawfish God's will catch me sin me the hill and program any turney of hero wads, which are the worst kind of wads. Number nine young people. Okay. I know that many people will say that at forty seven, I'm still young man. But those people are like ninety two. My box is full of people who are actually young twenties and thirties and such. I marvel them. I was watching one young Guy Phil Doing Burke's the other day with the strength of an Olympian and the Finesse of a dancer ten twenty at a time without slowing bouncing off the floor and into the air with an arrogant defiance of gravity. By comparison, I'm six foot, five inch sack of dog food repeatedly crashing to the ground and struggling to reanimate itself into an awkward standing position. Topped off with a pitiful hop that would unclear an earthworm young people suck I hate them. Number eight thrusters. Who the hell came up with this exercise anyway Hitler. Thrusters involve doing a front squat often with heavyweight and then elevating into a push press at the completion of the squad. Renton repeat. Frankly. It's rude and uncalled-for. Aren't we already in here working our asses off when we could be at home on the couch like normal people must you squash are very spirit to? If. The punishment for felony was five years of one hundred and thirty five pound thrusters. I guarantee you prisons would be unnecessary. There would be no crime. Number seven, the music. So we've established that there are young people in the box, right? Much to my displeasure it seems that young people don't WanNa work out to James. Taylor. The Eagles or yellow. Quite the contrary hip hop music seems to be the sonic driver of fitness these days and it's actually educational yesterday I learned some new words while doing hand released pushups. Unfortunately, I can't use these words unless I'm attending perhaps a drive by shooting or a drunken FRAT party. They might be a little harsh for the FRAT party now that I think about it. Number six rounds for time wads. As much as I try to convince myself that I don't have much of an ego I have to admit that I really do hate always being last. Are F. T. or rounds for time watts, and I'll remind you that a wad is a workout of the day are a collection of movements in reps that are repeated over a set number of rounds usually five until completed. All participants start at the same time and finish well whenever they finish. By contrast am wraps, which stands for as many rounds as possible are completed within a specific time range usually fifteen or twenty minutes everybody starts and finishes at the same time recording their total rounds at the end on the whiteboard. See I love Amraams. I. Love Them because I'm not left out there trying to complete my workout in desperation while others have long since finish stretched out showered dressed gone home gotten married had kids grown up and died. Number five partner carries. It is what it sounds like. As part of the odd, you have to literally carry your partner, some specified distance, perhaps two hundred meters. I've done this. Once my partner was Mike Trainer Nick, who is twenty eight years old two, hundred and forty pounds and built like Tarzan. I'm two hundred and thirty five pounds not twenty eight and not built like Tarzan. We had to do a bunch of other crap before carrying each other two hundred meters apiece is if that wasn't insanity enough. I'm not sure which was worse being the carrier or the carry. Slung over Knicks back like a bag of garden malt his shoulder jammed into my already upset stomach. I was being rattled two pieces upside down out of breath trying desperately to hang on and not puke all over him and me both. At one pitiful point Nick Scoop me up in his arms like Eh Gasping gangling bald headed white-bearded Benjamin Button baby and ran down the busy street cars passing with aghast faces peering out in shock and people deciding whether or not to call nine one one. It was one of my crowning moments. Let me assure you. Number four, the smells of the run. Most cross fit boxes are in retail strip malls or in industrial areas. This makes running very interesting. My favorite parts are the smells that I, encounter along the way. On a four, hundred meter run those of us that used to work out a place called cross fit barefoot which no longer exists. Run a gauntlet of fragrances that waft from a Chinese restaurant, a pep boys, auto shop and Exhaust Laden street a piece smelling highway overpass and numerous dumpsters, cigarette depositories, and trash cans. I. Feel like Catnip in the hunger games dashing to reach her bow in the Cornucopia and not get slaughtered in the process except my opponents are disgusting odors. Combined, these odors usually win. Number three handstand pushups. When executing a handstand push up you literally stand on your hands with your feet overhead resting against the wall. Then you lower your head to the mat and back up again like a push up that is if you can do them. You I must be able to quote unquote get on the wall. At. This is my problem getting on the wall. I mean call me an elitist, but I prefer to walk on my feet I've been doing it all my life and I'm good at it I'm not a gymnast in one look at me. We'll confirm this to everyone except perhaps stevie wonder. Me Trying to get on the wall resembles a gawky fourth grade girl attempting cartwheel's in a city park the difference being that Gawky fourth grade girls can actually do cartwheels. I have yet to complete a single handstand push up but I've certainly mastered the art of the failed attempt. Nailed it. Number two encouragement. I know sounds non intuitive but I really hate receiving encouragement. You see when I'm the one offering the encouragement. It's usually because I'm impressed with the person and their performance. Hey, way to go alex great job or good job Andrea, you're killing it. But when others encourage me I suspect it's because they are sad for me or they are truly afraid that I might die and they want to go out on a positive note good job mark. We'll be sure to send your belongings home to your family members. Great work. Encouragement sucks. And the number one reason why this forty seven year old hates cross fit Positive Change. Okay I. said these weren't in order but I actually say this one for last because it's the worst. I'm here to tell you if you're considering taking up cross fit for God's sakes don't. It's an insidious trap because much to your eternal, Har-. Positive changes will enter your life to fight your best efforts. You'll lose weight get stronger start looking like Tarzan. If you're a guy in literally feel better, which is super annoying. If you're like many people my wife for example, you'll even enjoy the process itself and cherish the Camaraderie and new friendships. And what will this main? Yep, you guessed it. You'll have to keep doing it more trainers, posted wads, guilty consciences Disgusting Young People Thrusters Hop Rounds for time humiliating partner carries odor runs thinly veiled encouragement and positive change. It's a vicious circle run. While you still can. Oh in your do-gooder wife will keep telling you. She told you so. I hate. Cross fit. Which you've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark B Johnson. Subscribe, wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A. D. Dot. com.
Overstuffing: What If My Baby Takes Big Bites? with Dawn Winkelmann, MS, CCC-SLP
"The NBA is starting to show that they're hungry. We want to be proactive in get immune ready if we can do that rather quickly than babies tend to not over stuff because or not. So hungry, it can still have that great sensory in learning experience. Hey there I'm waiting for registered Dietitian college professor and Mama Seven specializing in baby living here on the baby led weaning made easy podcast. I help you strip out the noise and nonsense about feeding, renew the competence and knowledge you need to give your baby a safe start to solid foods using baby led weaning. A. Hello and welcome back to another episode of the baby led weaning made easy podcast. I'm your host, Katie Ferraro, and today I have a very special guest with me. Don Winkelmann is joining us to talk about over stuffing. What do you do if your baby takes too big of bites will don is the perfect person to answer this very pressing question that a lot of you guys ask me about Don specializes in pediatric swallowing and baby led weaning. She's a speech language pathologist. She's also feeding expert for easy peasy the company that makes the silicone suction mats and bowls which many of you use she. Also designed their open cup and their baby utensils. So she's got a lot of expertise about what's going on inside of your baby's mouth because are interested in learning more about Don's work. She's on Instagram at Don S. L. P. Her website is also missed on S. L. P., dot com, and with no further ado I wanNA bring don on to talk to you guys about over stuffing and what do you do if your baby takes a big bite will dawn. Thank you so much for being here today to talk about over stuffing and what do we do if our baby takes a big bite the Katie it's when my favorite topics and I have to be honest I literally thought you made the term over stuffing up like when we started working together I was like, Oh that's like a cute thing and you're like, no, it's actually a thing. So could you tell us what does the term over stuffing mean? Yes. So over stuffing is win, a BB places too much food in their mouth and it fills up their oral cavity and why that can be dangerous is, of course, we as the feeders are panicked that baby's going to gag or choke on this food that is filling a baby's. Mouth and they're not aware of how Dylan Okay and you mentioned choking and fears because that's definitely one of the biggest barriers to doing baby led Weenie as parents are scared of choking, and so they worry that when their baby bites off a piece of like a soft strip of food that they're gonNA choke because they don't know how to chew. So could you tell how do babies learn how to chew at first especially when they don't have teeth? Yes. So babies don't need teeth in order to learn how to eat and they certainly don't need them to learn how to eat safely so. What we need to do to be able to help babies learn how to chew is that we need a model safe eating and what modeling is is when we actually demonstrate what we want to do with a particular food. So my three strip food approach decreases over stuffing and actually encourages in chewing. So what that is, I basically give three strips of food into the bowl or plate. The first strip is for the adult to model. So in my case, I'm having a strip of food from that bowl in I'm going to model chewing their food. The second strip is for bb to chew. On while they're watching me as me modeling that, and then the third strip is for baby to chew without a model and so what we're trying to do here is were implementing this chewing approach that bb is learning how to be able to do this action because we're there in front of baby actually demonstrating safe eating in doing this to the first ways that babies are learning, how to choose what's called the much too, and so it's just their mouth enjoy going up and down to be able to mash the foods. So we want to over exaggerate this much. Chew we want to go. In and teach baby how to safely these foods, and if you are not eating the same food than you're not actually modeling how to do that. So sometimes, parents will show me look I'm I'm I'm actually showing baby had a two and I'm like, yes, you are. But you're actually chewing on air you actually have the eat food a little bit to be able to give bb's the extra information that they need from a visual standpoint to actually. To demonstrate that and watch you do it. So make your chewing animated, make it fun and then there's that third piece that's still in the bowl right? So you're you're using at first trip to model babies got the second one, and then you're just going to wait and see if maybe will actually grab that third piece and then do this month's chill without a model and if they don't do. It at the beginning guys it's totally okay right. Your baby is learning how to eat. They have been watching you for a while, but they do need a little bit of practice. So don you mentioned the munch to and I heard you doing your cookie monster noise it's a totally different experience for me to do a podcast interview with you because we normally would that I worked together we're doing video. Trainings and she gets really dramatic on what a month to looks like could you move us into then after the months to explain I, guess for the audio listeners what's the next phase of learning how to chew after the much to write the next phase is called a rotary chew and so that's the way that you and I actually choose. So it's more of a think of a cow kind. Of Chewing, it's going in this like rotary most and we don't really think about it because we are such expert eaters that we don't really recognize what's going on with our jaw in our tongue in her cheeks in our lips and our palate what are mouth is doing during his time, but we're really going through a rotary pattern where our jaws can moving in this direction and if you're right handed. Her, John might go more to the right. If you're left handed my go more to the left and it's actually making this rotation that is helping to use the teeth. But at first babies are using a much because they don't have any teeth they're using their gum line to be able to force the foods that are already soft that were offering that are nice and safe and be able to. Match those foods and when they start to get teeth, then they start to move into that rotary chew powder. All right. So you guys I mentioned that Don and I do a lot of video trainings together and I know when we do our workshops together to teach baby led weaning where Don's a speech language pathologist she's focusing on how baby learn how to eat. I'm the Dietitian I focus on what? They need to eat for growth and development. So when we teach together, we do big QNA sessions after someone will always ask I get. So freaked out when my baby stuff's a huge piece of food in my mouth. So John I was hoping next, you could talk a little bit about the answer that you always give, which is about what size and shape to cut the foods but for those. Of You who may not have ever taken one of my trainings with dawn if you guys want to get signed up for the next time, we do we teach them just a few times a year, and when the next one comes up, we can email you and let you know. But we teach a whole hundred first foods approach to starting solid foods and if you WANNA get on the email list. In order to be notified the next time, we aren't co teaching go to one hundred first foods dot com you can sign up and leave your email address their. We have so much fun doing all of these live workshops and answering all of your questions. So Don can you answer that question? We always get like if my babies over stuffing, you always tell them. All right. Well, here's the shape. And size of the food you should be offering for baby led weaning. Is that look like yes, I like to offer strips of foods and as compared to cutting up into very small bites in the rationale behind that is if your baby over oversteps and baby is feeling that in their mouth that there's too much food if they're tiny pieces of food, baby can't get that out of their mouth they. Don't have the oral motor skills to spit out really forcefully or find that tiny piece of food that's been cut up with their tongue. They don't have those or motor skills yet. But if you have them cut up in either spear or a strip form, then they can pull out that strip that they have held into their little chunky little fist and pull that out and so it decreases that. Risk of choking because they can actually save themselves if you will and be able to pull that out. Also, if we do have to go in which, of course, we shouldn't go into a baby's mouth. But if we do, it's really hard to find a tiny little piece of food as compared to a bigger strip that we can just grab out with our fingers without really destroying feeding relationship with us. Training go in because we're panicked and tried to save baby it's really important to offer those strips and spears that are a great size for babies to be able to learn how to do this themselves and when you mentioned the strips I know people are going to ask. So I generally say good rule of thumb you guys for the size of the strips and analogy if you think about just. Like the size of your adult pinkie finger or about the size of a French fry that generally about the right amount but you wanted to be long enough a few inches so that the baby can scoop it up even before they have their pincer grasp. So at six and seven months of age, we want them to be able to pick it up by themselves from the Matt or the Bowl and. Have a little bit sticking out of their fat little babyface so that they can then control the intake because that's one of the overarching tenants of baby led weaning. Right that the baby is in control of feeding themselves in this strip shape allows the baby to do that. So don you mentioned sometimes parents do freak out and I think many of us have been guilty of that. What should we? Do if our baby bites off a big piece of food and I, start to freak out. So the first thing that I will families is don't lunge a baby in a see this often because you know I do in home feeding therapy and I'm constantly seem parents want to jump across the table and in save rescue baby but we don't want to lunge a baby or take a deep breath like. Because what happens is that baby is watching us we are giving babies such great. I contact when we're feeding them and there's this one relationship of of this attention it's called joint attention and we are both focused on one thing and that's the food and how babies eating and if we look nervous or scared or we take that inhalation relaunch Ford we can actually frighten baby and even if it's just a moment where maybe is just a little alerted or startled what happens is that baby will actually take breath in and if they have food in their mouth and. They open up their airway to take that deep breath into like Ono. Would his mommy doing then that food will actually go down into airways what we were actually afraid of we can actually is happening and I always tell parents just sit on your hands alike, do a Lotta work on instagram and they'll say I sat on my hand during his would have been so proud of me and the point is to sit on your hand. So you don't get the baby or touch your baby, which could startle the baby and 'cause what's essentially a harmless gag to turn into. A harmful choke. So that's a very good reminder on we need to stay calm. Now, what could we do to prevent over stuffing or is that something was she didn't even really worry about no we we should. There's so many things that we can do to be able to decrease the risk of over stuffing. The first thing that I tell families to do is be proactive get some meals ready before your baby really start showing those extreme signs of hunger. So if your baby started showing you a few cues that they're hungry, let's start the ball rolling because basically over. Stuffing can start to occur and it could be habitual for babies who have been waiting to eat in are really tuned into their hunger cues, and so they'll grab all that food and stuff it into their mouths and so the first thing is we can be proactive in star don't wait till the baby gets really really hungry they're screaming or crying or just you know you can tell the baby's getting fussier. So we want to be proactive, and then the second thing is that we want to offer a high chair with a foot rest clinically I find that BB's have. Decrease overstepping episodes when they're seated comfortably and safely in a high chair with a stable and adjustable foot rest. If they feel comfortable and they feel stable and they feel safe, they don't rush. So a lot of babies who have their feet that are Ding Ling will try to rush through the meal because they're uncomfortable and so it can lead to over stuffing babies are trainers shove food into their mouths to be able to fulfil that hunger desire and do it rather quickly because they're you know uncomfortable in the high chair so we want to offer higher that is. Easy for baby to have their feet in have that stability and some parents will say to me like, will I have a high chair with a foot rest but my baby's feet don't meet that foot rest yet, and I always say that you know you can either get a different highchair that has an adjustable th arrest or you can kind of add some boxes or you some duct tape or manipulate the high chair that you have now to be able to give baby that really great foot support at their meeting in order to feel a little bit more comfortable in. COM- in the High Chair and helps with decreasing over stuffing and when they liked him engine when we're talking about overstaffing is because of this topic, make some other parents sad because we're like, oh, my baby's not even interested in food. We just started I wish my baby was so excited an anxious or not anxious that as a negative connotation but was so eager about eating that they would overstock. So I do want to just point out that over stuffing is not something that affects all baby some babies at the very beginning they're not gonNA be interested in putting very. Much if any food in their mouth for the first few days or even weeks of baby led weaning and you guys if that's you, that's very typical as well. But there are some babies who take to it pretty quickly and get really excited about eating and then experience over stuffing. So that's who dawn is speaking to and it doesn't apply to everyone. But I think there's a lot of helpful tips in all of the things that you said today Don that can help us to make sure that we're offering foods in a safe environment and prepared safely to help prevent. And to help our babies learn to be independent eater. So where can the listeners go to learn more about your work and some of the other topics that you were mentioning today? Yes. You can go to my website at Miss Dawn. S. L. P. dot com that's M. S. D. A. W. N. S.. O. P. DOT COM, and on also on Instagram at Miss Dawn. LP with tons of great feeding tips, we do t to live. Workshops together a few times a year again, if you WANNA get signed up to learn more about our hundred first foods approach to starting solid safely with baby led weaning go to one hundred first foods dot com. You can leave your email address and then we'll notify you the next time that we're teaching a series of live workshops don thank you so much for being here today I really appreciate it. Thank you so much for having me. Well hope you guys enjoyed that episode on over stuffing I, know it's a very specific kind of random podcast episode topic but I seriously get so many questions about over stuffing and I love having dawn on as an expert to explain exactly what we do to prevent over stuffing, and then what we can do if the baby is over stuffing and then I think most importantly she gave us a good reminder on the number of different things that you don't want to do. So don't forget if you want to learn more about dawn's work, she's on instagram at Miss Dawn Sap. Her website is Miss Don L. P. DOT COM and as I mentioned in the episode Don and I co teach a Series of live workshops a few times a year, we actually cotija program called the hundred first foods field guide, and if you want to get signed up to get alerts for the next time, that program is open and were teaching live Webinars we would love to have you join that email interest list to get informed and get your name on that list. Go One, hundred first foods, dot com you can sign up and then you'll know the next time don and I are working together. If you have more questions about baby led weaning and giving your baby safe start to solid foods again that you are l., is one hundred first foods dot com. Thanks for listening to this episode about over stuffing.
Libsyn podcast revenue up 16% in Q1 2019
"The latest from pod news dot net. Lipson has released its KOTA one earnings reports lips ins podcast revenue increased by sixteen percent to three point three million US dollars, and including pan networks. The company got six point two eight million dollars in revenue. That's up twenty four percent. Year-on-year Lipson now hosts sixty two thousand shows and four point nine million media files. It claims it's responsible for round thirty five percent of the apple podcasts top two hundred and delivered over five point one billion downloads in two thousand eighteen Dominic Milano has joined audio advertising platform targets spot has vice president of business development in North America dominant was formerly a senior leader at TRITON, digital the iheart radio app. Now offers over two hundred and fifty thousand podcasts. The company has said, one of them is us by comparison apple podcasts has over seven. Hundred thousand podcasts. This is the BBC. The BBC has switched its domestic news. Bulletin on smart. Speakers which was mainly a version of the pacy news bulletin on BBC radio five live to one being produced, especially for smart speakers, if you don't like it. You'll find an update from LBC on your smart speaker, as well podcast hosts simple casts spent a week off site recently in posted their insights from it. You'll find a link to that from our episode notes, and our newsletter today Pandora has a new native MAC app, but it comes without podcasts. Eric dean, the CEO of Stitcher was interviewed on Yahoo finance recently talking about podcasting after game of thrones this week on luminary the co creator of slow burn releases a new podcast, fiasco, which dives deep into the untold stories of the two thousand gore versus Bush recount in a ten episode narrative series podcast day from Ray. Jio days European London. This June is coming. We asked if we could extend our discount code and apparently we can until Friday, his the code for you. You'll save around one hundred year o- on the ticket price. The code is peed news day one as pay. N. E. W S, D, A Y, number one, big letters, please, when getting your ticket, and you'll save about one hundred zero on the ticket price, and you can support us with the money you saved. And finally, the number of babies called Alexa has halved in four years, wonder why sorry, I don't know that. And that's the latest from our newsletter at pod news dot net.
Music From Around The World: Episode 9
"Mason vera paine pain here and thank you for joining me for episode nine of music from around the world today will feature music from dawn. Ed is dead. The duo sean. Franken ryland james and wolf saga first up his dumb mike. Missoula and vocalist. Mccall formed the group dawn out of boston massachusetts. There's sewn incorporates both organic and like china s from a variety of genres like pop electro pop an old pub. Here's a listen to their latest track. Featuring tiktok star chile called mixed signals takes theater check. I got tired this too. S you leave. Your chose another. Mr dahl mr. I saw scared off. Dog mixed signals is a collaboration between don an upcoming. Tick tock start. The song is about to people who keep misreading each other and overthinking the start of a relationship. The pandemic hasn't slowed down this year. They have a few more collaborations coming out and live shows. If it's safe to do for more information visit. Da vivey n. dot com for latest projects. Next artist up at his dad is from spain. He has a variety of talents from being a producer deejay musician and co owner of a record label at dead's new album is called global sickness. And it's an idiot k records. Here's their latest track in her love. You're Inter is on his dad's latest album global sickness which was released on march eighteenth. I listened to the album global sickness. And it's a mixture of latronic music and distorted beats global. Sickness is available now on spotify visit at his dead that yes for latest information about his upcoming projects that is e e d i s d a d. Yes if you're a fan of calvin harris platinum canadian producer sean. Freak is someone you should check out. Sean recently teamed up with fellow canadian and platinum artists. Brian james with this latest track. Save me job class. Close the scene so so when you take jet solange it save me was released on march nineteenth on physical presents. Sean has worked with artists like stevie. Oh key and oliver hilton's ryland. James is also a platinum artists with his previous hits in my head which has garnered twenty seven million streams. Checkout sean frank. Dot com for his latest music videos tore information and merch. That's s. h. a. u. n. f. r. a. n. k. dot com also check out ryland james's music dot com for his latest tours music. That's r. y. L. a. n. d. j. a. m. e. s. m. u. s. i c. dot com ontario's very own wolf. Saga is back with his latest single nowhere. Land streams lose nor can be so allison down jazzed body is cannon speakers on about knowing never be ask down the wrong mashes special. aw Wolf sagas known for his energy based stage presence with the pandemic fans are unable to see this but go to youtube and check out his performances from his home studio. You will not be disappointed. Wolf sagas self entitled album is available on spotify for stream follow wolf sog on facebook at facebook dot com slash e. n. t. e. r. w. o. l. f. s. a. g. that's facebook dot com slash. Enter wolf saga. That's it for this edition of music from around the world. Follow me on twitter. Facebook and instagram. At mason vera paine. If you're an artist and you would be interested in appearing on the show. Reach out to us at contacted mason. Vera paine dot com. This has been the mason vera paine. Show thanks for listening. Tell him oh heads. Wgn radio dot com for exclusive content by mason also mason on facebook and twitter at mason vera paine. That's all one one and don't forget to show the show with your friends.
017: I wanna be Dick Proenneke when I grow up
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast. Fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood. NB. Twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. On today's episode. I WanNa be Dick Panicky when I grow up. Wait. Alone in the Wilderness, the documentary about. Naturalist. Richard Dick Pregnancy is one of the most remarkable films ever made in my estimation. Yeah I know that's an ambitious statement but I stand by it. I can't think of another movie or TV production that can exhilarate me fascinate me. And make me feel like a sorry sack of poo all at the same time. Have you seen this documentary pbs often plays at during their fundraising drives I I thought about six years ago. Let me back up and give you a little context. When he retired at age fifty, one in nineteen, Sixty, eight printing key was a World War Two vet an expert outdoorsman and a sought after diesel mechanic in the more tame areas of Alaska. That year, he decided to put his skills to the test by moving to a remote area of the state called. Twin. Lakes building himself a log cabin in living alone for a solid twelve months. Among his many talents prentice was also a skilled photographer and he recorded many of his activities that year using a film camera mounted on a tripod. These films along with his extensive and eloquent journal writings would later become the aforementioned documentary. The movie is hypnotic. Most of the film has that soft oversaturated slightly sped up super eight look. It was shot without sound but sound effects were very skillfully added so much that I believe they're real when I know that they're not. One of Frankie's friends narrates it in the first person again I know it's not printing voice, but I do believe it is anyway. But the thing that has me glued to my seat every time I watch alone in the wilderness is the absurd over the top competence of the man. He decides to build himself a cabin in the Wilderness and by God that's what he does but he does this not with a pickup truck full of power tools from the home depot. He uses hand tools many of which he fashions himself. Let me repeat that he uses handmade tools to build other handmade tools. He is limited only by his imagination. The door hinges furniture, chimney and fireplace moss roof bowls, spoons, pots, and pans. All of this makes himself. I'm not talking about the completely off kilter ugly unusable out of balance leaking ineffective kind of thing that I would make in that just describes the store-bought curtain Rod. I tried to hang this weekend. I'm talking about a cabin that honest abe himself would have admired. I'm talking about wooden spoons that looked like they just came from a Williamson Oma store print aqui never even appears the least bit winded in the film. As we watch, he notches out twelve foot spruce logs and rolls them perfectly into place before squatting on a high slope to pick a bucket full of wild blueberries for his buttermilk pancakes. There's no sweat. Pouring down his face, no wild cursing and throwing the hatchet into the weeds as he realizes, he cut a log too short. No kneeling on bruised knees among an explosion of parts and pieces of some pressboard piece of junk from target as he stares desperately at tiny unintelligible instructions written by some Korean Guy, sleeping peacefully on the other side of the planet. No further cursing when he gets to the end of the entertainment center only to realize he mounted the door upside down and now that little magnet thing won't connect with the other little magnet thing to make the door close as opposed to me pretty did none of that. What he did was simply live out the fantasy of every modern man who wishes he could be that guy the one who could live off the land and build things without messing them up. More rare than his physical skills were his emotional ones because his solitary year get this turned into thirty. He lived alone happily by all accounts for three decades. Due to health problems he left his by then famous cabin at age eighty one having lived all those years with only occasional visits from close friends and he moved to California until his death a few years later. Humans are as we know, social creatures and most of US require the company of others Prenton though was perfectly content with the company of nature, his journals and himself. The question is, did he miss out on life? Did he die a lesser man because he didn't choose to have electricity indoor plumbing? A nintendo switch or an Iphone X. did he miss out because his trash wasn't picked up every Thursday at his curb or because he couldn't run around the corner and grab a bag of cool ranch doritos at Kroger. I don't think so. I think he lived his time on earth entirely on his own terms and in respect of Mother Nature and in the fear of Almighty God. And while the lack of human companionship would be unthinkable to most of us. I, don't think he missed it at all in when I get to heaven someday, I intend to sit down with Richard Panicky on the front steps of that cabin and have a good long talk about it. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark E. Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and shared this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D.. A.. D. Dot.
019: Bigfooters Dont Stop Believin!
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood. Envy. Twenty-first-century if what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. On today's episode I tell my fellow big footers don't stop believing. Wait. Okay, I'M GONNA. Come right out with it. I. Believe in Bigfoot Sasquatch Yeti. There you go. I said hello my name is mark and I believe in bigfoot. Altogether hello mark from the infamous evening back in nineteen seventy two when my ill advised parents took my six year old self along with my brother and sister to see the legend of Boggy Creek I've been fascinated by all things bigfoot. For the record I wanted to see fantasia but was out voted in the back seat of the station wagon on the way to the theater for weeks after I wouldn't enter a dark room without someone else turning on the light I. Thanks for that Mom and Dad. I've got my own proof about bigfoot. Mind you. I'm pretty Dang. Sure that me and my buddy. Randy Pennington. Yeah I know the grammars incorrect spotted a granny Smith out of focus bigfoot up in the woods above our farmhouse one time when I was twelve. We sprinted the nine miles all the way back to the house screaming bloody murder. Okay maybe it was more like a quarter mile but we ran all the way and we were really upset. I was. So into bigfoot as a teenager I wrote my senior term paper on him or her. The. Patterson footage. I got an A. minus in my defense. I, think the minus was because I was typing on that coded Irascible Typing paper and the word beast got smeared on page three it look like beach. Anyway I can argue for hours and support of the bigfoot theory, but you can find other more credible sources for that. Oh, I admit I'm one of those people who likes to believe in things like Neil. Diamond. I'm a believer for you to affect my disbelief in something. You must prove it to be faults though I don't require the same thing be proven true. If I think it's cool enough sue me but I think the world is a lot more interesting and fun when populated by things that defy explanation. Yes, there are very intelligent. PhD's out there who assure us that the big three bigfoot, the Loch ness monster in ufo's couldn't possibly exist and lay out academic scientific and. Arguments to support their theories, but I'm unmoved by this. Now Lean forward because I'm going to whisper something in my conspiratorial voice. Maybe just maybe we don't actually know everything. Maybe mankind isn't quite as brilliant as it thinks it is. Yes I know that's crazy talk but I'm feeling frisky. But there's one more thing I do know there is an enormous contingent of Internet users whose apparent purpose in life is to follow bigfoot facebook pages and make negative comments. Ridiculing Online bigfoot believers is practically a cottage industry I've learned, and I'm talking about some serious ridiculing virulent personal attacks and hateful obscenities just because someone believe in bigfoot. But it's not only that hateful. It's ugly. Hit the Internet anytime. A person makes a statement of belief in anything. Optimism, is not to be tolerated in today's world allow commenting on a blog page and let the negativity began. In, my opinion, the single biggest downside of Internet interaction is the total absence of accountability protected by a nondescript username untold distance. These jerks will happily spout things that they would never have the guts to say in person the lack of basic human civility in manners is shocking for these reasons alone I. Think bigfoot believers should be held in high esteem. We bring positive energy to a negative world says I. We are the renaissance men and women who shamelessly wear shirts the proclaim. Gone Squadron or bigfoot saw me but nobody believes him or sasquatch stole my underwear we wept at the end of Harry and the Hendersons. And what's wrong with this? The worst case scenario is no conclusive evidence is ever found and we happy with our bigfoot t shirts on. No harm done. The best case is that we were all vindicated and scientific proof is revealed that there really is an eight foot tall hairy guy minding his own secretive business in the woods behind that old Phillips Sixty six session in when that happens I won't even say I told you so. Over. We're just you've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D.. A., D. DOT COM.
MFAW- Episode 3
"Mason vera paine this mason vera paine and thank you for tuning into this latest episode of music from around the world. This week will feature music from thomas. Monday and stephen rubin fanta. Ed is dead and resident. Thomas blonde is a deejay and producer based in washington dc in the nineteen ninety s. He built on his electronic groups. And stephen rubin is who has a lifelong passion for exploring new music. Sounds both thomas stephen. Join me today to talk about their latest project seascapes. Thomas how did this collaboration between steven yourself come about Stephen and i met Maybe in two thousand fifteen two thousand fourteen by a fellow musician that he worked with and his band and they hired me to like mix master their album and some of the stuff they were doing thinking what stephen was doing and thought that you know we could Maybe collaborate something. And that's how this club. We should come about stephen both you. Thomas have two different styles of music. Was it hard to come to a medium. That felt right. It was very easy for thomas. And i to fall in line in this collaboration. Even though we come from different musical backgrounds and that's mostly in performance not necessarily taste You know me coming from a mainly live rock band and him mainly dj work. It was very easy for us to sort of combine those elements in this collaboration. He had seen my band. We have been friendly before this started and we sort of knew. We sort of pete. Each other's interests i think he saw elements and what. I was doing that that he enjoyed and i saw the work that he was doing that. I enjoyed because i've always had a big love of electronic music especially the kind that he was doing so it was more an excitement to work together. Less of a worry. Is this going to work. I knew in my heart. The second we started out it was going to be something unique and interesting and to me. That's what it became steven. What is the concept behind your latest track. Seascapes being that it's an instrumental track. There's no real concept to the song obviously but Musically to me. I feel like the root of the track has probably in some dub sounds and trying to explore that sort of territory Thomas your collaborations labeled as a trip hop creation. Could you tell me what trip hop is so to me. Should pop is a fusion of hip hop and dub and electronica mechanic music psychedelic soul. World music experimental. I mean a lot of stuff. So that's a trip hop is to meet steven one other projects. You thomas have planned together right now. Thomas and i plan to continue to release songs as we create them as of this recording in early february of twenty twenty one. We are currently working on four or five new tracks in preparation for release throughout the rest of this year. So i think we've really kind of fallen into our sound that i'm very excited with the new stuff working on because it's sort of taking us in a new direction From where we started even for joining me today visit rhythm and culture dot com. That's our h. y. T. h. m. a. n. d. c. u. l. t. u. r. e. dot com for the latest project and releases. These shared a pickup. See sons out on march fifth in such a short time. Dj fanta has made his mark on the scene with multiple songs and collaborations under his belt. There's no slowing for this canadian native. During a recent interview. I had with bamba. He explained how covert has changed. His music acting totally changed my music completely on its head i. I had a lot of time to think about what i wanted. You know my career what. I wanted to make musically you know. I really missed making house music. The music that i was making i started so i kind of reverted and started making that stop. That initially fired me. Here's his latest tracks. Still call you mine into crazy jobs Along did have you heard. Brian fail the check out. Fan but music dot com. That's f. a. m. b. a. m. u. s. i c. dot com for information about obama's leaves projects. Ed is dead is the stage. Name of the band's frontman emil Hostess do performs on various instruments such as guitar drums piano. He produces well as co writes many of their songs. In addition to be a musician is also producer and dj. Check out his latest single endlessly took status Might be endlessly will be on his dad's upcoming album global sickness which will be released on march eighteenth for more information about his dead and other releases visit e d. I s d a d dot. Es that's is dead dot. Us resident is a twenty two year old deejay producer out of germany with achievements under his belt. Such as single hitting twelve million streams on spotify and mixes on sirius. Xm chill. He has positioning himself to be the artists resident for joining me. When it comes to your music what inspires you. I think there is this People expect everything's have a deep inspiration or meaning and maybe that's because with lyrics. There's always this very exact thing. That lyrics are about But personally you know. of course. ben wrote lyrics. And i don't know what inspired him to do that. I've been working on the instrumental and usually when i work on. Instrumentals is wait for inspiration. But i just work and stuff until i like it and until it inspires me and it's been the same thing with reason. How long did it take for you to work on your latest song. One good reason ben. I have been working on this record for quite a bit. And it's been over a year and we went through like twenty versions that we did a couple of re recordings and a lot of what's calls and i'm really happy how everything turned out. the in you blue Trump resident. How do you wish others perceive your music. I don't think it's the right approach to worry. How other people were perceived your music. Most importantly i try to do something that i love and hopefully someone will enjoy it. It's always nice to get positive feedback but in the end. Yeah some people do sports well listening to music. Some study hit one guy told me this by music brought him through his bachelor's thesis. Everyone conceals music differently. I guess what are some of your upcoming plans. Upcoming plans are working on new music and records. Since it's basically the only thing i can do during covid. I'm at home making music. Stay tuned for everything. That's ahead for this year. Thank you resident for joining me and make sure you check out. Resident music dot com. That's our ez. I d e n t m u. s. I c. dot com. Thank you all for joining me for another edition of music from around the world. Make sure you follow me on twitter like me on facebook and instagram. At mason vera paine. If you're an artist and wished to be interviewed or your song featured on the show reach out to us at contacted mason. Vera paine dot com. This says being the mason vera paine. Show thanks for listening. Wait him oh heads. The wgn radio dot com for exclusive content by mason also fully mason on facebook and twitter at mason vera paine. That's all one one and don't forget to share the show with your friends.
021: The Whip-poor-will Story
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood NB twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. On today's episode I'll tell you the whipper wheel story. Wait scratched. The year was nineteen eighty-one and I was fifteen years old. My Dad and I hit spent the day working on our Christmas tree farm at the base of Booger Mountain in Taylorsville North Carolina with two other hired hands, Randy, and Jeff who were both around twenty years old. It was late summer and we were using long razor sharp machete like blades to shape or sheer the White Pines for harvest. The day had been long and hot. But as the hours crept by we were motivated by the fact that prior to working that morning dad had submerged a large watermelon in the cold water of the creek that threaded its way through the remote valleys. By the end of the day, it would be ice cold and crisp. When quitting time finally came dad dispatched randy to retrieve the watermelon from the creek. Randy walk the fifty yards through the Bush hogged grass from the old farmhouse down to the branch as the local sometime called it and pulled the watermelon out of its temporary housing. The Crescendo of CICADAS was starting to calm down and give way to the gentler calls of crickets and tree frogs and caveats as the afternoon became dusk. It was this time of day that always gave me the creeps at Burger mound reputed by the locals to be the most haunted place anybody had ever heard of. Though. We lived elsewhere. I had nearly grown up in the weather. Grey Barn would farmhouse and had called Salamanders and crawdads in the creek since before I could remember. I should have been completely at ease on the farm, but there was still an ear equality to the place that. At me. Booker. Mountain had an impressive pedigree of. Spooky. Legend had it that a nineteenth century family? The walkers had lived in a cabin in one of the backfield's on the farm and had gone missing on Christmas Eve one year. Paul Walker was a bad man they had said and the devil finally came to collect him. Mall Walker and the three kids all good as gold were nonetheless part of pause belongings and had been taken to. A vine covered chimney still stood in the field and I always gave it a wide berth. On the upper slope of bigger mountain which folks in the upper appalachians would probably refer to as just a foothill. There was a Cherokee Indian graveyard where twenty eight bodies in to find mules were supposedly buried. Folks claim that war cries could be heard drifting down through the trees and a green missed when sometimes rise from the soil of the grave. These spooks. Or boogers had through the years apparently made their way into the valley and laid claim to the old farmhouse, the origins of which were unknown. Pipes routinely rattled doors open and shut through heavy stumps propping them open. In. Heavy body lists footsteps clump through the House late at night. For Years Dad's old Ford tractor would without fail stopped dead on the tiny bridge that lead onto the property like a horse that was nervously refusing to enter a dark forest. That evening and nineteen eighty one as Randy handed the watermelon to dad lightning bugs were launching their displays in the field that front of the house in the woods beyond the creek were becoming alive with sound. Dad carried the melon into the kitchen to section it for eating as Randy Jeff and myself settled into our day routines of cleaning our shearing knives. I sat about halfway up the rickety wooden steps that led to the screen porch of the House Randy and Jeff on the Tailgate of Dad's truck. The whipper wheels Lydian. Now any country person will tell you dusk is the time for with a wills although they will often sing well into the night. There was an enormous weeping willow tree next to the bigger mountain house and whipper wills would often use the tree as a home base of sorts. There is very little in the whole wide world that can spook a kid quicker and more thoroughly than the call of a whipper will. Hank. Williams called them lonesome. I consider them to be downright terrifying. As the birds began calling I made an off handed remark to Randy and Jeff you know I've been coming to this farm since I was a baby and I've heard whipper wills a thousand times. But I've never actually seen. One I said is I cleaned my knife. I wonder what they look like. Immediately something fluttered out of the woods beyond the creek. In the dimming light I could make out a shape flying in our direction. The shape grew larger and larger and flew without hesitation in a straight line toward me. The projectile passed over the heads of my startled companions by only a foot or two and continue toward me. Frozen in shock I watched as the bird approach within a foot of my face fluttered for a second or two in landed on a step aside, my foot. Nobody moved. The world stopped in all sound became muted. Like, in a heavy snow. It can't be. The phrase flitted across my brain as if detecting my thought the bird about the size of a pigeon cockpits head and looked at me. Cried and shot off into the darkness with allowed beating of wings. The three of stared at one another for what seemed like a longtime. Holy beep exclaimed Jeff only he didn't say beep at the time. This seemed like an appropriate response. We all broke into excited laughter and chatter as dad walked out with the watermelon slices. He smiled broadly as we recounted our story all shouting at once. I heard the whipper will to he said is if our story was so implausible, it needed adult reinforcement. That stuff only happens on booger mound. It's now been some thirty nine years since that September afternoon and I still tell the story it was a perennial favorite of DADS to and he recounted gleefully at every opportunity until old age came to steal the memory. After all these years I still wonder. Was it Paul Walker who sent the whipper will. Or one of the Indians up on the mountain. Or one of the unnamed spooks that undoubtably sculpt along that old cold creek. More likely I figure it was simply a gift from God. You WanNa. See A whipper will he said okay here you go. I've always appreciated that gift and though the old house has long since been torn down and the once remote valley is now dotted with subdivisions. I still like to believe that the Hanes of Burger Mountain are alive and well rattling pipes in sending whipper wills. Which you've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark B Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D.. A.. D. Dot Com.
030: The human design flaw of married-with-children sex
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of Fatherhood in the twenty first century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus all. On today's episode, I'm going to broach the sensitive subject, the human design flaw of married with children. What with the incredible challenges and upheaval facing humanity these days, wildfires, presidential elections, pandemics. Supreme. Court nominations, and rioting in our cities just to name a few. I felt that it was time for me to address what I consider to be the most confusing, frightening, frustrating, and divisive issue of all married with children sex. For most people sex in any form is an enormous enigma. We all wanted at some point in our lives but excluding the paid kind, the process of getting it is fuzzy at best and impossible at worst. Training is entirely on the job and it's difficult to know how well your form is and whether or not it needs work. Much. Like fly fishing, we know from magazines and movies what sex is supposed to look like but the actual execution is usually embarrassing awkward and often ends up with something getting tangled or stuck. I've got the handed to. God was clever about sex. He knew that it was necessary to keep his human species in existence. So he made sex pleasurable and addictive like strawberry now and later candies. Everyone would want to get involved either now or later. Now far be it for me to second guess, the One Almighty God of the universe. But when my time comes and I hopefully end up in the good place, I will have some questions like, for example, what's the point of mosquitoes and poison ivy? How that wisdom teeth which we seem to be better off without. was male pattern baldness absolutely necessary. I'd also have this question regarding sex. I get the reasoning behind making it so fun and addictive but couldn't you've just kind of even things out after the procreation part was taken care of In other words. Couldn't you have installed an off switch in? US Man more specifically US married fathers. I'm thinking this is a fundamental design flaw. You see before babies, men and women seem to have fairly equitable sex drive's. It's all fun and games and the fact that marriage makes it perfectly acceptable. Should you would think ramp up the good times even more. But after that first kid arrives on the scene things change. In their minds many women I won't say all no longer view themselves as one half of a fun naked wrestling duo and they switch over into mommy mode. Any natural hormonal urges that once manifested into naughty cinemax worthy late night behavior suddenly becomes redirected into making sure that this one's the isn't too snug for the baby's bottom or that the diaper bag has been fully restocked prior to a five minute drive to the grocery store. Now. There's no question that mommy mode is the correct mode. Being a mother is clearly demanding GIG and requires fulltime attention and concentration unless the parents decide to turn their children out into the backyard to be raised by squirrels I get this. After careful consideration I have come out against children being raised by squirrels. But Mommy mode can have disastrous side effects. For some the sheer concept of remaining sexy and desirous becomes distasteful and perhaps a little inappropriate regardless of the encouragement in pleadings of their aghast husbands. As their innate Mamo meter skyrockets. There once dominant sexy wife o meter plunges. They are clearly mutually exclusive. But not in the minds and or the loins of us, doofus DADS and husbands. Sure are paternal instincts of family protection barbecuing, and the execution of proper nerf football spiral are ignited particularly with boy children. But our sex drive's tend to remain dangerous pre. Kid Levels. Nothing in our bodies has really changed between the before and the after of that I kids arrival. The equipment after all doesn't know that it's already done its job and is being placed into early retirement. What the hell the equipment demands flabbergasted. I'm at the top of my game I signed a long term contract. This is the point at which God should have installed an on off switch in men. I mean imagine how nice things would be. A Rock Hill well to movie would come on and we'd be entirely unmoved. An unexpected exposure to the Farah Fawcett poster which stirred nothing in us but nostalgia and the urge to watch Charlie's angels reruns Saturday mornings in bed with our wives could be comfortably devoted to sleeping late rather than to well. Not Sleeping late. It's not that are long-suffering. Wives don't gamely try to play along they do their level. Best. God. Love Them. If the meteorological conditions are exactly correct in the stars are in proper alignment alive may actually initiate sex although this is exceedingly rare in nature. Recent studies have shown that this phenomenon happens at roughly the same frequency as the appearance of Haley's comet or the complete freezing over of Niagara Falls, and when it does happen, a husband is often so confused and thrown off he may simply become paralyzed and unable to function at all. Again, all of this anx could have been avoided if God would have simply put men and women on the same page instead of in entirely different books. The other problem is that not only do men have equipment that functions well past its expiration date. But they also have very healthy egos. Sure they understand the whole mommy mode thing but they also WANNA be desirable to their wives and the idea of sympathy sex is nearly more distasteful than no sex at all mind USA. Nearly the almost last thing that we want for our wives is to play along while secretly hating the process and hoping that it will be over as quickly as possible I mean nobody is all the way. Okay with that. So. How is this universal and time honored conundrum to be solved? Is there nothing that can be done no flashy men in black pin thing we can use to hypnotize our wives into forgetting that they have given birth to children and make them believe that they're twenty two again and that their husbands are still super hunky and wear size thirty, two genes. While I. Now realize that I gave way too much thought to that scenario. seriously. Though if I had an answer, I would undoubtedly be a very wealthy man by now. I think that the realistic approach is to continue to work hard and providing for our families do our best to raise and council Google caring children be as romantic as possible as many days of the year as we can to our loving long suffering wives. Superimpose a Hologram of Brad. Pitt's head onto our bodies at bedtime and hope for the best. We just you've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark E. Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A.. D. Dot, com.
BDG Episode 004: Assigning Roles For Different Perspectives
"From the gospel of jill. Chapter to jack's house was no different when they arrived on his front lawn. The door was open. His dad's car was parked in the front yard with its door open and the engine still running. The front door to his house was not closed and there was a tremendous amount of yelling coming from inside of the house. It was hard to make out but he could hear his dad yelling through it. Do it the sound of his father was almost overwhelmed by his mother. Cries jill stay here. Jack said is he rushed into the house. The next few moments jill or like a repeat of the fear. She experienced a few days ago. The shouts those cure anger hatred. The violent thrashing of furniture blasted out in the house. Jack began to heal for his father to stop then. There were no more cohesive more intelligent words just the sounds of screams and the rustling sounds of a fight then came the silence. The fighting and screaming had stopped for the briefest of moments. No sound came from the interior of jags home. It was a pity the silence could have stayed. No no real scream of loss spilled out the front door. It was the scream of jack's mom. She made the same sound that jill made. When she saw her father died. It was the same scream. She led out when police killed her mother. It was the sound of disbelief and reality colliding. This was the sound of a loved. One gone forever at the hands of another someone in that house. Adjust just been murdered. She prayed it wasn't jack today. Gills prayers were answered in a frantic s. Jack and his mother hurried out the door as she rushed over to help. Jill saw that. His hand was tightly grasped around a piece of wood upon closer inspection. The blood soaked stake in his hand showed itself to be the leg of a chair. That was apparently broken in the skirmish dazed and in disbelief. Jack began to panic. He was going to stab her with this. And i tackled him. We thought he so strong. I've never seen him that mad. You just you wouldn't stop i had to. I had to. Jack was going into meltdown mode in this current situation. Everything was colossally fucked. Jack was losing his shit because he had stabbed his father to death. His mom was losing her shit because she was just attacked by her husband then watched her son stab to death. Everybody was standing outside of the house. Clueless jack was covered in blood. It was only going to be a matter of moments for everything went down the drain and nothing was recoverable. She quickly grabbed onto jack shirt and steered him towards the front of the house where a water hose was conveniently coming out. She turned it on full blast and began to hose down. Jack's hands to wash off blood. He just stared blankly at her for a moment. You have to get the blood off of you as soon as you can. If you're dead was sick he might give it to you. And then you'll try to kill your mom too. She barked at him while he continued to blink out in a state of shock with firm smack to the face shielded him jack. Snap the fuck out of it. Washed that fucking blood off your hands. Sometimes good old fashioned slap is exactly what somebody needs because that was all it took to bring jack back into reality when we write action or drama or suspense or any kind of deep situation. Were naturally inclined to go into movie theater mode. You know the kind of thing that you see in movie theater with this particular sample of chapter that i brought into this. I wanted to show you that. You don't always have to go into movie mode you know you don't have to go inside the house with jack. You don't have to see jack stab his father to death and you don't have to see his mom lose her shit inside the house upon seeing that. I was fortunate enough to be able to tell this portion of this tale from jill's perspective. Where she's outside the house if you've ever been anywhere where there's a fight going on like a real genuine fight in it's inside of a house in your on the outside. This is what it sounds like now. I had the fortunate pleasure being able to do audio engineering on all of this stuff. So i'm able to craft the story in this way and make my listener. Enjoy it but this is actually from a book. What you're hearing is just an excerpt from an audio book. So the two things that are really really wanted to point our this number one. We don't always have to go into drama mode. We don't always have to go into the house with someone we don't always have to be on the front line to experience something sometimes the best way that we can experience something is is from the outside because it leaves a lot to the imagination in doing that. I saved myself the hassle of having to write this fighting now. It's not because i was afraid to write the scene. It's just that. I felt it had a lot more impact from jill's point of view. Seeing jack go in hearing the the craziness that goes on inside and then seeing jack and his mom come out and there's just that look on his face he's just in complete shock because generally when something crazy like that happens. You come out in shock. You don't immediately just walk out cool calm and casual like they do in the movies of gamma just killed my dad but you know what. It's all good. I'm going to be fine There's a lot of shock that happens in a serious situation like that and you have to take into account that people are going to be messed up when they do messed up stuff. If you get your leg hacked opened by chainsaw you're going to have a pretty crazy reaction to it. It's not just going to be like some sort of super awesome super hero where you get your leg cut opening. You're just cool with it and you go and you take down. The army's just not the way it happens. The second thing that i wanted to draw your attention to was when they came out there was this moment of those two are in shock but jill is kind of in control. Because she wasn't in there for that experience it allowed her to keep a relatively cool calm head even though she kind of knows what happened in there And at the end of the clip she starts to find out what happens in there. She was able to keep a cool calm head be detached somewhat from the situation and be able to take control and take charge. Her number one priority. Once came out was to that blood off him in this In this story we're dealing with sickness and the sickness spreads a number of different ways. So jack had just had a tussle with his dad. He killed his dad. He got his dad's blood on him. And jill. the cool calm collective. One is ready to to take care of business. But jack isn't coming around. Jack's not cooperating jackets lost and it's very important that i put that in there because we really needed that. Oh shit moment. We've got a bounce shortly after the end of this clip. That i showed you they they. They wash jack off. They get in the car and they get back. And that's almost the end of the chapter. But i wanted to show those two extremes and the only real way i could do that was to leave jill outside and let her just kind of hear what happened on the inside because if she was present for what happened on the inside then she would come out fucked up so to kind of summarize. You need to make sure that you have a good grasp on what position your characters need to be in at any given point in a scene. Are they going to be the one that goes in and loses their shit they going to be the one that stays outside in his able to maintain sanity and keep the whole situation together. Even if you were writing like some sort of like military fight scene you're going to have the new guys the grunts that are going to go in. And they're gonna lose their shed and you're going to need those soldiers in those captains to stay calm and keep things under control so in those tense moments. Make sure you're delegating responsibilities to your characters. Jack is the character that goes in and does the fucked up thing in has to deal with the fucked up consequences of it. Jill is the one who stays outside does not have to experience the screwed up situation and is able to keep her head together and bring jack back around to reality when he comes out of that stressful situation. So before you start writing situation make sure you know everybody's role. What is everybody going to do. Are you going to have people that are just going to be gabbing. Their their their brains out or you're going to have people that are responsible for the action. Are you going to have the bad guys. Some people watch the bank baltin. Some people are the getaway drivers you you just need to assign that responsibility to each character in each kind of crazy situation anyway. I hope you guys really enjoying these. Podcasts you can always come over to. Brian's daily grind dot com that's b. r. i. s. d. a. i l. y. Are i in indeed dot com for more of these podcasts. Or you can check them out on your favorite podcast Host or aggregate or such as spotify tunes. Google play podcasts. Stitcher and the list goes on and on and on and on Do me a favor. Leave a comment leave a like. Gimme a five star review four. Start whatever you think. Just give me a review. Kind helps at the show You guys are rockstars. We'll catch in the next episode.
018: The Top 10 things Im offended, shocked, and/or outraged by 2.0
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of fatherhood NB twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. In today's episode, I'll give you the top ten things. ended shocked and or outraged by two point now. I'm updating this blog slash podcast Abid in light of the latest explosion of social media outrage and the funny thing is that I actually wrote that line about two years ago. So there was something going on two years ago, and of course, we all know what's going on now. So I'll ride something entirely new for the next round of outrage which I'm sure we'll becoming in like five minutes from now. In the United States being offended by something has become somewhat of a cottage industry. Perhaps it's a result of the I'm okay you're okay and free love philosophy of the nineteen sixties. It has manifested itself into full on intolerance of anything perceived as harsh or PC, or maybe the fact that anyone can say anything within the relative safety of the Internet much like I'm doing now as given rise to an expression of righteous indignation in a way that would never happen if we were having real conversations around the kitchen table. For whatever reason we all seem perpetually ticked off by something or somebody people are regularly outraged shocked and affronted by things wouldn't have made it a shrug from our grandparents who were too busy taking care of silly stuff like, Oh, I don't know saving the world from the Nazis and Japanese imperialism perhaps. But nowadays, we seem to have directed are mad in only slightly less significant areas. For example, fat people are offended by skinny people who use the word fat in any context Hollywood is offended by the religious right. Pita is offended by hunters and farmers and carnivores and environmentalists are offended by off road vehicles, disposable diapers any fool absurd enough to not fully support the concept of global warming. All sides seem offended by drones for one reason or another, but everybody secretly thinks it there. Cool. But that's just for starters. Beggars at intersections are offended by drivers who don't fork over their money or by those who offer food or a job rather than cash. gangbangers are offended by perceived disrespect yet shoot each other down without giving it. A second thought co workers are offended when you write. Thanks instead of thanks with an exclamation point in your email no exclamation point equals a sarcastic. Thanks apparently. To avoid fence quote unquote little people must not be referred to as quote unquote? midgets. African. Americans must not be referred to as Black and native Americans must not be referred to as redskins within the context of pro football. Some are also offended by the word Indian playing cowboys and native Americans doesn't quite have the same ring. Does it though if I were a native of India, I'd be offended by that offense. I think the working rule these days is that when you describe somebody to somebody else any mention of ethnicity without specifying the country or continent of origin is generally frowned upon for fear of outraging at least several people and risking the social stigma of being unfree ended on facebook it's exhausting. It occurred to me after giving this some thought not much being offended requires an apology by the offender to the Effendi to defuse the uncomfortable situation. However, in this age of shocked indignation, apologies are rarely accepted often only serve to inflame the situation. In other words, you can't turn around without offending someone in when you do. You're screwed for life you're permanently on the offend dis blacklist is never thought. I'd miss the days of facebook when people were posting their next trip to CVs or to the dentist, but I actually do. So of course being a full-blooded English American or something I've decided it's time for me to climb aboard the ultra sensitive express and get my indignation on I have therefore written down my top ten things. I'm offended shocked and or outraged by number ten old men with thick heads of hair. As a man of fifty four years young I, have a cue ball head I find it exceedingly offensive to encounter an elderly man with thick locks. How dare they flaunt this in my face? Scandal is really an incredibly offensive to young bald guy's geezers with thick heads of hair should be sheared bald immediately or at least fitted with a proper calm over. Number nine people who say with a straight face that they like doing burpee. This offensive because if you've ever done a burpee, you know these people are lying to your face. It's total crap number eight. Cryptic facebook posts like when people post so sad or unfreezing believable or that's it. I'm done. These posts are about trolling for sympathy and concern and ours narcissistic more famous big brother the Selfie who now has his own stick number seven being referred to as tall. Used alone the adjective tall never means handsome or muscular or awesome. It usually means skinny lanky and you're never gonNA get the best looking girl offense taken I countered quote unquote tall by to play the guitar and I got the best looking girl anyway. So they're. Number six when people don't thank me for holding the door for them. If I'm wearing a dorms uniform and holding the door at the entrance of a fancy hotel, then I may give you a pass for not saying thank you otherwise it's just flat out rude to do so in front of your children thus perpetuating the inconsideration is unforgivable and that one I'm serious about number five. Young people who've never heard Bohemian rhapsody. Knowledge of this masterpiece should somehow be wired into the DNA of all humans who were born in the more recent years in believed that current pop music is great. If you haven't heard of Bohemian rhapsody. Don't admit it to anyone. Go, educate yourself and don't be caught with your pants down again whippersnapper while you're at it, get yourself up to speed on Barracuda renegade and life in the fast lane. Number. Four co-workers walk into your office in lead with I. Know You're really busy but. This really only allows for two possibilities number one. They don't really know if you're busy or not. So they say that as some attempt to make you feel important. So you'll happily do their bidding or number two. They don't care that you're really busy in consider their urgent project to be priority number one at the expense of all others either way I'm offended either for myself or on behalf of you number three erectile dysfunction ads that run on the Classic Rock Channel of my cable system. Okay cable people. Now you're getting a little personal in presumptuous not to mention the fact that my kids are in the room. Number two people who go to Disneyworld or on Disney cruises and post a ton of pictures on facebook. This shows a total lack of compassion to those of us who haven't yet fulfilled. Our promise made ten years ago to are now teenagers that we'll go to Disney and the next year so I mean can you not go the hell down there and have a ball with your kids without splattering it all over my wall for a solid week unbelievable. Now, an update to this since I originally wrote this blog post. I have taken my kids to Disneyworld in. Yes. I in fact, splattered pictures all over facebook. So I kind of take this one bag anyway. And the number one thing I'm offended shocked and or outraged by. Guys in my age group who only saw jaws one time years ago at a sleepover and don't remember much from it. Really and you're out in public walking around and talking to people how dare you. My affronted nece is off the charts. I mean, it's common knowledge that any guy in his mid forties to mid fifties worth. His salt should be able to quote at least most of Captain Quinn on the USS Indianapolis Monologue. If not the entire thing word for word, most respectful men can also easily real off mayor vons. My kids were on that beach to line as well. Don't come at me with this. Lame. You'RE GONNA need a bigger boat crab any tall fat four wheeler driving irish-american midget with half a brain can produce that exclamation point. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty, twenty by mark B Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and write me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A.. D.. Dot Com.
020: The Top 10 Movie Moments That Make This Tough Guy Weep
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of. Fatherhood. Envy twenty-first-century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me, Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus of all. In today's episode, I'll give you the top ten movie moments that make this tough guy week. Wait. I ran across one of my favorite movies, the natural, the other night and as usual got sucked in and watch the whole thing. I've probably seen it like thirty five times as I found myself wiping away tears at the end I landed on the idea to write this post, which was actually published a few years ago. Aging. Is Weird in multiple ways not just the obvious ones like losing hair where you wanted and growing it where you don't as if troublesome physical changes aren't enough I find that I'm becoming. Well. A woman. Not In the Bruce Caitlin Jenner sense mind you but. Really. It seems that my standard big tough guy no cry rule is going by the wayside. In fact, I can get misty and practically anything these days. So much that my kids enjoy watching me instead of the movie if they think I might get weepy, which then makes me mad and weepy at the same time. So in the spirit of full disclosure, I thought I'd just embraced this phenomenon by listing the top movie moments or scenes that make me hide my face a couch pillow. Number ten about the last ten minutes of Sergeant York the movie from Nineteen Forty. One. I've always been touched by Gary Coopers humble portrayal of World War One hero. Sure. It's Hollywood and the accent is a little corny. But Cooper plays it with the quiet straightforward dignity that is authentic and wonderful. It also helps that tiny hometown of Pell mell Tennessee is also one of my favorite places and I have good friends there number nine, the last shot of scrooge. Nineteen, seventy-one with Albert Finney as he tells the Marley door knocker that he's going to spend Christmas Day with my family. This is my favorite version of the Dickens classic in Finney is heartbreakingly sweet and awkward as the Changed Scrooge. I never miss watching it every year I'm reaching for the pillow. Number Eight. The Natural Nineteen eighty-four as Roy, Hobbs or Robert Redford circles the bases through the falling sparks in Wilford grimly looks on in disbelief from the dugout. This is the type of seeing that gets is where they live. It. Is the ultimate sports victory moment in Bramley expression is one of I'm witnessing something that will never happen again. The fact that Roy Hobbs was inspired to crush that home run because he just found out that he had a son and the son was watching from the stands amps it up several notches. Randy Newman's thundering epic score raises every hair in my ears because that's where they are now and makes the whole scene breathtaking. I can choke up just listening to the soundtrack alone. Damn you Randy Newman. Number seven wonderful life nineteen forty-six. When the housekeeper Annie donates her husband money, which makes Donna Reed laugh slash cry. Also when Harry Bailey enters the room some of these choices are pretty obvious. I'll admit and this scene is one of them. I. Love How good the townspeople conquers evil, Mr Potter, in such a small poignant way. I also love how Harry forfeits would should have been a hero's welcome for himself by focusing all his attention on his big brother George. Number. Six field of dreams. Nineteen eighty nine when Kevin Costner asked for a catch with his dad. Yeah, it's plainly obvious in. Yeah. The movie is known for this but I had to list at anyway it's a guy thing. You see ladies until that moment neither Costner nor his dad had acknowledged the fact that this was his father and then of course, all those years of regret dissolve away in a simple game of catch. Sure his dad is a ghost, but we can overlook this minor detail. Number five Apollo Thirteen, nine, hundred, ninety, five when the capsule makes it through re entry in mission control erupts in. Cheers. Again. This is pure guy stuff. We love victory. We love when guys cheer and give each other Bro hugs. We love when the toughest guy it Harris's character dissolves into tears. If just for a moment, we love the Brash American spirit of the nineteen sixty space race and most of all, we love it when Tom Hanks survives. An. Honorable Mention is the final shot of the right stuff when Gordo Cooper rockets into space as the greatest pilot anyone had ever seen. Number Four Saving Private Ryan Nineteen Ninety eight when the old man version of Ryan asks his wife if he's been a good man. First of all Tom Hanks did not survive. That's sucky fact number one. Any scene were Tom Hanks dies is just uncalled for. Sake fact number two is that Ryan had apparently gone through life tortured by the question of whether he had lived up to the sacrifices made by Sergeant Miller Hanks and the other members of the outfit who hadn't lived through the mission. As an old man who should be happy Ryan still questions his own survival many years later. I've personally known veterans who were exactly like this old man and it is heartbreaking. This may be a movie, but it is certainly not fictional. Number three Mr Holland's opus nineteen ninety-five when the governor introduces Mr Holland's masterpiece in pulls back the curtain to reveal the. Orchestra. This is where I go full on. Ugly. Wheat mode. As, a musician who spin around fifteen years trying to make it in the music business, I can very much relate to Richard Dreyfuss his character in this for all his former students to give him this gift upon his forced retirement and to see his reaction Richard Dreyfuss is awesome. is like someone pounding me in the heart with an emotional sledgehammer? Number to lonesome Dove Nineteen, eighty nine when gus dies with woodrow at his bedside. You don't have to be a guy or a lover of Westerns to Saab at this scene, you just have to be human. Gus mccrae might be the single most endearing character ever created either in a book or film. Larry mcmurtry Pulitzer Prize winning novel is my favorite book ever gusts is the greatest character in Robert. Duvall is the greatest actor. But what makes this scene? So incredibly difficult is Tommy Lee Jones. His character woodrow call is for most of the movie tough, ornery and emotionless. But to lose his oldest and closest friend is just about more than woodrow can handle. My wife Holly wasn't right for about a week after seeing this for the first time, we tried to discuss it afterwards, but we only sounded like a couple of toads croaking at each other it was bad. By the way I know this was a TV miniseries and not a movie but this is my list so I can do whatever I want. And the number one moment that makes this tough guy weep from Monsters Inc in two thousand one. When Sully Sees Boo at the end I save this for number one because everyone in my family loves the fact that it makes me cry. hilarious animated movies aren't supposed to make us cry right I suppose. So but this one ruthlessly breaks the rules. Sully is essentially me. Big. Gruff often grumpy but really just a big softy and sometimes I wear purple POLKA DOTS to. I have a daughter now, a teenager who used to be a little girl like boo and sully being forced to say goodbye to her forever near the end of the movie. Had Me in a fetal position when I first saw it. But then when Mike surprises sully with booze door at the expense of his poor splintering hands and then sully gets to peek in her room and hear her exclaim, Katie. Well. That's just messed up. Again. Noon score rips away at any defenses you may have had left and stops them. Okay. Now that we've all composed ourselves, let me know what I missed, what you agreed with etc. don't leave me hanging look forward to talking to you next week. Take. These. Hey. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and right me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S.. D. A. D. DOT, com
BDG EPISODE 003: Guide Your Readers Attention
"From the gospel of sam chapter twenty one slowly. His eyes adjusted to the light. Only to see that there was no definition to this memory. Only an infinite white space and a younger version of himself sitting in a fetal position bloody and beaten. He was whimpering from the soul crushing experience that took place in the kitchen. Sam had no memory of this though. It felt oddly familiar quarantine asked voice from the expanse. I hate them hate them. I want them to die. I'm not strong enough. sam whimpered. Orange are sam raised his head to see who was talking to him before him was a young boy that looked oddly like him. The boy was not coward on the floor instead. He stood proud and tall. His skin was much paler than sands with milk texture that was somewhat translucent through it sam could not see bone and muscle. Instead he saw what appeared to be some sort of black flame that was undulating beneath the surface. This pseudo copies is were filled with the same black substance that pulsed below it skin the same in the box new instantly this was malice the evil of evils the most unclean and he said crouching down in front of sam or to do chauffeur soifer. I don't know the worst. They hurt each other the worst. They hurt me moan sam. I just wanted to stop. I just want to die darn much more pretty face. Might you one cheek. We mean smashed wanted to bring short glorious misery to them and wife and such pain to them and death growled malice. His grin stretched from ear to ear and showed his hideous black mouth with jagged. Sharp teeth protruding. From its gums. We can do that asked sam. Maoist giggled just justin for quick. The boys eyes welled up with tears. Malices words with a. I compliment that anyone had ever given him. No one in his entire life had paid this much attention to him. Here was someone that wanted to help him. Someone saw his pain. The only person that ever recognized is real anguish. The overflow of emotion was strong enough to choke him up. All he had ever wanted in his whole life was for someone to listen just to be wanted and to be hurt but the same inside of the box knew that this was a trick though. This was a memory that he had never known he knew the thing that tempted him as a boy was a beast like no other. I want them to suffer. I want them to hurt the way that they hurt me. The younger sam sobbed angry. Spit filled scream. He shouted i let them to die. Hurt them you just yes. Malice said rising back to his feet wouldn't arden. Is it going to hurt. Shortstop for shortage washburn or sh a brief second of hesitation passed to the younger sam. He knew what he wanted. Truthfully he didn't care how he got it. He had been broken and beaten and saw no way out the beasts. Temptation was the only option that had ever been given to him. He may not get another chance. Yes in my last episode. I talked about letting the reader breathe letting them experience the environment letting them experience everything. That's going on before you jump into action with this one. We're gonna talk about the exact opposite. We're not letting the reader experienced anything outside of the dialogue. that has happened in this piece. We've actually spent all of our time focusing on the emotion and the dialogue for this particular piece because it is set in an empty white space. Now you don't have to set your situation in an empty white space to capitalize on this trick but this one we did so taking everything out of the scene which means not telling the reader about which way the wind's blowing what color the walls are as their dirt on the ground. Is it hot as a humid by not telling the reader anything about the environment surrounding these characters. You allow your reader to focus strictly on those very important conversations. It's about tempering about knowing when to use what trick and if you have a very very important conversation especially one that is nuanced or that has a lot of emotion or detail into it. You may want to exclude the environment from that portion of your writing writing only the characters the emotions they experience the way that they look in particular in how they react is kind of important to keeping your readers. focus centered if in the middle of this conversation. I took you off to you about some graffiti that was written on the wall or a cat that jumped out of a trash can down the alley. It would really detract from the power that this scene has knowing when to add that and when not to add that is a little tricky so let me see by can help you out anytime. You're going to do action. You wanna make sure that you build up to that action like we talked about in the last episode but anytime you are dealing with nuance importance. Depth conversation or something that is critical to the story. You want to make sure that you are leaving that environment out. There is not really a real build up for that because the impact is here. This is where you want your reader's attention focused remember your reader is reading your book. They are lost in a world. But you are still there guide. Your job is to direct their attention from one thing to another. If this were going to be an action scene i would be directing your attention to all the craziness that is building up to this action scene. I would direct your attention to the environment. I would direct your attention to the way that other people are reacting to what is going on but this one. This is a very important conversation. My story so i have directed your attention to this and only this. I don't bring up anything else. Sometimes being able to focus your reader's attention is a masterful tool that you should use with this particular conversation. I tried to step in and show you. Fear and anger kind of mixed together with same as experiencing now. You don't have a lot of the surrounding story unless you've listened to the book but in this particular chapter he's gone to this crazy whirlwind and now he is this broken little child that is faced with a set of impossible options and consequences and he is being given the option to remove those problems from his life. A child is obviously going to say yes because they are not aware of the consequences that follow now when you do write a chapter or a portion of a chapter or a conversation like this you have to be aware that there are going to be consequences on the back end. If you don't follow through with those consequences your reader is going to get lost now. I don't show you those consequences in this chapter. Those consequences are echoed throughout the rest of the book. But because this conversation is so important it was beyond important for me to remind the reader that there are consequences that come from this one conversation right here now in the case of this book there's a lot of evil and a lot of heartache and our struggle that comes from the consequences of this one conversation so i don't really need to echo it in this chapter but if you are going to have a conversation that is this intense a conversation that is so intense that we are removing the environment. We're removing anything else except for our two actors or three or four actors. That are having that conversation. You need to remember to put those consequences later in the chapter later in the book or later in the story in general. Just don't forget about those consequences so to recap it is your job to direct your reader's attention. It is your job to focus on what is important and if you are riding a conversation that is important you must focus their attention solely on that conversation. There should not be outside influences. That will distract your reader unless they have a direct effect on what is being talked about. So don't worry about the environment. Don't worry about how the wind blows. The sun shines the can rattles down the street or the mouse that scurries along the alley wall focus on the conversation. You can describe things like what the characters wearing how they feel how. They posture themselves as they speak. Because body language is important. But don't worry about the external things also if you're writing a conversation that is of this caliber of importance. Then you need to make sure that you infuse the consequences of this conversation in the rest of the story. It's very very important because if you're not infusing it in the rest of the story or if this conversation that is super important doesn't have ramifications that spawned from it then. What really is the point of having that conversation in there now. There are always exceptions to these rules. There's always going to be someone out there that says but brian. What about this and brian. What about that. Or i have this very specific situation. That does this remember. This is a blanket teaching. This is a An example it is not a case by case rule book. You should take this and use this in your writings but this is not law. Just take it as kind of advice anyway. You guys are rockstars. I really hope you're enjoying these podcasts. You can always come over to. Brian's daily grind that's b. r. i. a. n. s. d. a. I l. y. g. r. i n. d. dot com brian daily grind dot com. Where we have tons of information tons of courses things that you can learn for free things that you can learn if you want to accelerate for a little bit of a fee and just check out some awesome stuff anyway because rockstars. I will catch you in the next episode.
029: How in THE HELL can you vote for Trump??
"This is the Doofus Dad podcast where we explore the fairly dangerous and much-maligned state of Fatherhood in the twenty first century. If what modern media tells us is true. Then to know a dad is to know a doofus hosted by me Mark Johnson the most accomplished doofus all. Today. I'll take a shot at answering the question how the hell can you vote for trump? Yes good. All election time. It's truly a wonderful season in something. I look forward to kind of like how a dog looks forward to going to the vet to be neutered. As. Much as I hate to admit it, there are strings attached to the freedoms associated with American citizenship. In return for living in a relatively stable country where John Thomas and Benjamin in. And all those other founding fathers gave us the opportunity to pursue happiness. We lucky. Americans are asked to vote every. So often for presidents sin representation in Congress and such. Frankly I don't think it's too much to ask. So as the husband of someone who worked with international refugees for twenty one years, I've had the chance to see America from a different perspective. Now, mind you I'm talking about refugees here not illegal immigrants huge difference. Trust me. If you are an American, you are lucky and blessed whether you believe that or not even in twenty twenty. Our problems these days seem pretty bad. I'll grant you. But they aren't as bad is watching your loved ones hacked to pieces with machetes. Or forced to swim across crocodile infested rivers due entirely to their religious beliefs or ethnicity. This is the kind of stuff folks deal with in other countries and I'm not exaggerating I personally know and Iraqi man whose brother was literally eaten alive by Saddam Hussein's guard dogs because the man was suspected of not supporting Hussein's government. I don't mean he was trying to overthrow the government I mean he was suspected of just not supporting it. that. My friends is actual tyranny. I try to keep this in mind when presidential election time rolls around. This is usually the worst of times for many of us and twenty twenty his ramp that up even more what with the wildfires, hurricanes pandemic, violent rioting, virulent partisan politics, incessant my pillow, dot com advertisements, and your other basic end of time scenarios. Not The least of these worries has to do with our American media. For example, I'm old enough to recall a time when we could kind of believe what the Stream Journalism told us. Remember that. You can pretty much take Walter cronkite on his word. He just told us what happened and we appreciated. He even assured us that that's the way it is at the end of every news program. Then, we made our own decisions on things and this all worked out quite well. In twenty. Twenty though the word journalism has essentially been replaced by the word propaganda. Now I'm a big believer in freedom of speech, but this is different. When I took journalism classes at East. Carolina University back in the nineteen eighties the first thing I learned was that objectivity was the key to good journalism. To be more specific. If it wasn't objective than it wasn't journalism at all. Use correct grammar constructor sentences properly, and tell the truth not your truth. But this isn't the case twenty twenty. The word truth has become as ambiguous as the word journalist and I can't understand how the truth can change depending upon the person saying it. Okay. But what does this have to do with voting for trump? You're saying slightly annoyed. Fair, question. The problem is we can no longer have faith in our truth tellers, the mainstream media. Because they are clearly no longer objective. Instead, we are forced to base our decisions on essentially the flip of a coin. Who Do we believe the left or the right? Which candidate is the lesser evil. Unless we have a personal relationship with that person and almost one hundred percent of the American population does not none of us can really know the candidate we're voting for. We only know what we're told. That brings me back to the original question how the hell can you vote for trump? Look. I'm under no illusions about the guy. Trump has the stupidest hair in the history of hair and that's coming from a bald guy. Trump's skin tone is one rarely found in nature unless you're a tangerine or a basketball. He has an odd voice and makes funny faces when he talks, he says and tweets things that are blunt improper silly and just unlike any president we've ever had he brags about himself constantly and his wife is way hotter than any first lady should ever be. I get all that I really do. So, how the hell can you vote for him? You're now screaming at me. Here's how and I'll ask you to lower your voice. please. Because I'm not voting four friend or pastor or role model I'm voting for President Yeah but hang on let me finish. See. As much as it pains me to say this, we have moved past the days when quote unquote presidential meant something. And we have the Internet to thank for that in my opinion. Prior to the mid nineteen ninety s our view of president was presented to US via fairly believable and unified mainstream media working in tandem with the house public relations team per se. Back. Then our government pretty much did its work and went on and the public was none the wiser now sure there were scandals in leaks in Gotcha stories and all that stuff. But that was all small potatoes compared to the modern world of social media where everybody has an opinion and facts are largely ignored. The problem is this. President's unfortunately are people. People are fallible. People have dark sides. They. Do stupid things and make mistakes. People even the ones we love most sometimes fail us. Disappoint US embarrass US and make us not want to vote for them for dog catcher. Let alone president. So I've said this before and I'm going to repeat it now. The only way for us Americans to vote responsibly is devote not for a person. But for platform. Even though journalism has become subjective, voting shouldn't be. It should however be an objective process of listing your deal breaker values and comparing those to the platforms you are being asked to choose from much like deciding on the floor plan of your dream home. What does the ticket want. What does the platform stand for when it comes to the economy? The Military International Relations Abortion Civil Rights. Taxation Individual Liberty Covid nineteen constitutional law and all the other elements at play. It's unlikely that your preferences will match. Perfectly. But which one gets the closest in which issues most critical to you. Whether or not the name at the top of the ticket refers to a weird blowhard orange man with an epic comb over. or a tottering confused lifelong politician hiding in his basement is inconsequential. Both are fallible humans who were destined to lie to. US embarrassed us in. Disappoint? US. So that's how I can vote for trump. Of the to unfortunate choices that I've been given, his platform more closely aligns with the values I've developed over my fifty four years on this earth. If I was voting for who I'd most like to hang out with. I'd probably choose, Biden. Look I'm not trying to get you to vote my way. I just encourage you to examine your values and vote accordingly. Be a doofus around your wife or your husband or your kids. But not in the voting booth. It's just not fair to the folks who risked their lives to set up this country or to that Sudanese or Kurdish or Somalian refugee who would give anything to be in your shoes. Bodies. You've been listening to the Doofus Dad podcast poppy right twenty twenty by mark e Johnson. Subscribe wherever you get your podcast and do me a huge favor and right me review and share this podcast with your friends. See show notes and other good stuff at www dot doofus dad dot com. That's www dot D. O. F. U. S. D. A.. D. Dot. com.