20 Episode results for "Rodney Dangerfield"

SYSK Distraction Playlist: How Rodney Dangerfield Worked, Live From LA

Stuff You Should Know

1:01:16 hr | 6 months ago

SYSK Distraction Playlist: How Rodney Dangerfield Worked, Live From LA

"Hey! Have you guys heard about the new show? Little Fires Everywhere, Well Academy Award winner. Reese Witherspoon Golden Globe nominee, Kerry Washington both star in and executive produced this eight episode. Limited series is only available on Hulu. That's right. The series follows the intertwined fates of the picture, perfect Richardson family and an enigmatic mother daughter duo who move into town and up in their lives with devastating consequences. Yup, it's now streaming on Hulu. You can check out new episodes every Wednesday only on Hulu. To. Columbia's week. We, need to repent. The epic fiction podcast Tuman Bay returns. We met before. Oh. Yes, general, you have no choice. It has to be. Caught. Clark. Listen on the iheartradio, APP apple podcasts own ever you get your podcasts. Welcome to stuff, you should know from how stuff works. Dot Com. Hey in well, hey, guess I want to say hey. Welcome to the PODCAST, but this is a little different. Because this is A. This is the intro to the podcast. That's right. We recorded a live episode at the La Podcast. Special Right and This is it. Yes. We did one on Rodney Dangerfield. It was September nineteen, two thousand fifteen. The Sophie Tell, beverly, hills, very chic, very and It was a lot of fun. We hope you have fun listening to it and stick around after the credits roll so to speak because we have a little bonus track at the end of this window. You guys doing. Thank you very much for coming to our show. That we do this normally, but It's usually just two of US and Jerry sitting here on facebook. While we record like eating me so soup. LOVES ME? And then we do live shows Tuba normally. There's like a Gulf of a stage between us and like you guys are right here. So. We're watching you to I. Guess is what I'm saying. She's got a winner shirts. Nice shirt and she's the only one. Oh I like that. I. Of course there. says. I listened to podcasts before cereal. Burn. On the back, but I'm cereal. We should also say hi. Everybody in Life Oh. Yeah, streaming, folks, hello, and of course thanks to audible and squarespace, and the rest of those people don't sponsor so I don't feel right in. The. Middle in. Sure okay cool. Jessica. Waiting out. Monopolies. Signed. Okay, so? You got to start with I. got nothing to start with I usually. Don't drink this early in the day, but the nerves in his felt it would be fitting. Tribute to our topic which we're going to get into so I decided to work up heavy sweat right 'cause. Rodney. Dangerfield is known for drinking and sweating. You're basically you're missing the tie. Again everything else covered. Thanks because familiar with Mister Rodney Dangerfield. Yeah, that's good. I'm glad to hear that he's a an increasingly underappreciated comedian like I've talked to at least a couple of people who have not seen back to school. I know, boo. And I was actually talking to someone who works here at the festival. WHO said? Is. He dead and I said Yeah that happens a lot so that he said why don't I remember that now? It's no respect, no respect. That's the cool thing about the guy like he that was his whole shtick. There was this whole. Hook right what we need to start in the traditional way to okay. Very nice. Hey and welcome to the podcast I'm Josh Clark. There's Charles W. Chuckers, Bryant and we are here at L. A. Best and. All you lovely people give yourself a hand. That a better you feel. A little more, you guys. Okay. Well now we have to start over. This lady. I mean people seem back to school? Great Start! So as we were saying. The weird thing about Rodney Dangerfield is that. He was his whole. His whole shtick about no respect is actually really really close to accurate as facts. Yeah, and not just while he was growing up, he had a really tragic terrible childhood, but also as he got older and older, and even after he blew up. He's still people just kind of took what he was saying and ran with it. He had this one story where he opened a club. which we'll talk about called Dangerfield's so it's very obviously his club. And he was on his way up to the stage, just been called up there and on his way some guy stops him and says Rodney can have your autograph, and can you also give some more butter? And this happened to this guy quite a bit actually. Yeah, yeah, so it does turn out that you will see even after death. The Guy got no respect, but. As Chuck will assert later. I predict. He he is, he's a comedian comedian and very well respected by the ones that count sure and I don't know if you guys know this, but a lot of Comedians have inner pane. which is the reason a lot of them? Get into comedy and a reason that many of them drink till they black out on many nights. Inner Pane is no secret to the comedy world but. You'd be hard pressed to find someone who was. Legitimately depressed and Sad is Rodney Dangerfield here's like a crying clown. For he was often talked about the heaviness. He felt every day when he woke up. He said he would wake up every day. And there was a lingering above him was his heaviness with a capital. Even yeah, and if you've ever, if you ever want to go down a youtube, rat hole, just look up some interviews with the guy on Youtube from like the eighties, and he does a lot of interviews, just like local TV stations, promoting movies and stuff. And when he's out of his stick element. It's one of the saddest things you've ever seen. It's really depressing. He's. He just had this air about him. You can tell the weight of life on his shoulders in it. All pretty much stems from his awful awful awful child right childhood. It is hilarious so far, everybody. So we should start at the beginning with him. He was born in Nineteen, twenty, one on Long Island. Not. In Long Island Chuck tells me. And he was born to Vaudevillian father who took off with one of Rodney's brothers to go hit the circuit. And that was that like he I think he saw him like once or twice a year for a half hour and hour or something like that said he saw his dad literally like twice a year growing up, and he was born Jacob Cohen. And His dad was a juggler, an comic who apparently hit the road because of his wife You know we're talking about what an awful person she was when we were going over this stuff it and that she was, but the more I thought about it. She had a serious problem. It was back in the nineteen twenties. You didn't diagnose things like they do. Today just ran off to the VAUDEVILLE. Pretty much, but she was clearly depressed like profoundly depressed and. Sadly completely abandoned emotionally neglected little right or I guess Little Jacob. He was he was left on his own from the time he could remember his mom literally never hugged him. Once never kissed him once he swore up and down. Yeah, this never complimented him or try to build them up she. She was a bad lady and starting probably around age eight or something like that He. Realized that if he's going to eat dinner on a regular basis, he was going to have to go. Get a job and go grocery. Shopping himself right so he basically raised himself about eight or so. and. The speaking of groceries, one of the one of the great things that stuck out to him about his childhood. He was He had to get a job after after school job. Who are still in school? And he lived in a fairly wealthy neighborhood, but he was not wealthy, so we used to deliver groceries to his classmates. Home! which kind of demoralizing on July ten you know? And he also while he was out there, running around on the streets there's. He wrote an autobiography year. He died in two thousand four and. He called this chapter male prostitute. Because he was like ten, and he was so unsupervised that there were apparently at least one or two local molesters. Hey Rodney. Come on up, got a nickel for you. and. He swears up and down that it was just. It was just kissing everybody. Don't worry. The child was just kissed by the grown man for a nickel. But he and it happened a lot, and he's doing it because he needed the money, yeah. So Anyway Rodney Dangerfield. Let's fast forward out of the horrible horrible funk. By the way we're GONNA pepper in some of his jokes here and there and debated on whether or not to try and do it as him. Because, it's hi. Marty promised. Here, there, it's hard to do that. It's hard to tell. Rodney Dangerfield joke without doing him and I took a little informal poll last night with some folks and they're like You sort of have to yeah. I think so. It's not like it's a good impression, but push. It makes me delivering my. Weirdo affects where I'm not even trying it all the weirder, so prepare for that, too, but one thing that he did and that, of course a lot of comics do they turn pain into funny and he really relied on his. His jokes is a way to. I mean the only time he was happy. It was when he was on stage performing, and as soon as he laughed that heaviness would come back, but he often joked about his mom. He would say mom never breastfed me. She told me she always thought of me as a friend. Which is a funny joke, but when you know the real pain behind it, it's it's just like the saddest thing you've ever heard. Tebbit of the funniness away from it. I've got a good parent one. You're ready. Yeah, so I remember the time. This is my writing. Teams Go. I. Remember the time I was kidnapped. They sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. That probably did not happen, but it gets the point across. And plus it's funny, and so if you were parent Joe Okay So. Tell you. My parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. Funny. That's going over better than I thought it would. So certain about age fifteen starts. He realizes he's actually Kinda Hilarious, and that he has a talent for taking all of this horrible tragic stuff and turn into funny stuff. And he started writing jokes got good pretty quick. He started selling jokes, age, fifteen or sixteen to establish comedians. Yeah and he kept them. He had this Duffel bag. You would write jokes by hand is entire career. Put Him in his Duffel bag, so he literally had a Duffel bag full of like thousands and thousands of jokes and apparently I think. You said that during a typical performance later like once he hit the big time he would tell like over three hundred jokes in a set three fifty. Yeah, yeah, our granted their quick jokes still. But he he remembered them all and he wants it best. The guy was a comic genius. Hopefully, that's coming across here or will by the end of this right, so it gets his big break at age nineteen. He's written jokes for a few years, and he's GonNa. Try this out and he gets a job at a catskills resort for twelve bucks a week. Ten weeks including room and board yet dirty dancing seen very much, so yeah, but he's like the up and coming comic onstage right. Have you guys ever seen? ironman meets dirty dancing that mash up now go check it out. This to- bizarre. It's one of the things you'll ever see. There's nothing to do with Rodney Dangerfield. Add on a sickly, but so he's working. He's working hard. The Stanton catskills like he gets re up he he keeps going back to the catskills. It's one of his regular gigs, but on the on the side while he's working, he's a singing waiter at the Polish Falcons nightclub where winners yeah, we're Lenny. Bruce's mom was the MC, he was an acrobatic diver. Right, but I know what you're thinking. Triple Lindy. No he did not do the triple indy in the movie obviously. Those of you who've not seen back to school. That was an in joke, yeah. He was a diver in the movie. The competitive diver while I was GONNA punish them for not having seen it okay. Sorry. Trying to drive them appoint. So in nineteen fifty one he gets married for the first time to jazz, her name, Joyce in dig, and he had a couple of kids and move to New Jersey, which we all know that the death knell for any comedian, the trying to work in New York kind of means. You've given up. But he didn't give up just yet. He did for a minute for sure. Yeah, not not at that point though he was still trying to work. But when he turned twenty seven, he quit comedy and literally did not perform from the age of twenty eight to forty one at forty one. He was like. Let's try this again. Well his he and his wife divorced, so he's got a little more time. I think I'm going to. Try, comedy again. They actually got back together like the next year in stayed married for another ten years or something like that, but this time around. He was like. Let me see if I can figure out how to how to balance home life with this trying to break into comedy right? Yeah, and let me try and develop an act I. Think the first time he flounder because he didn't. He know what kind of comedian he wanted to be. He tried singing tried impressions even tried comedy for a little while, but he also he had these jokes. About how much is life sucked like? He used some of these same jokes his whole life. But they just didn't hang on. I'm quite right because he had his whole life ahead of him, and he was young and full of promise that second time around he was right there in the sweet spot age forty one. Little desperate kind of sweaty and these jokes about how bad! These jokes about how bad is life or it was going? Like really just kind of hit a lot more. He adopted a persona basically and. That definitely helped. Yeah I mean it was. It was SORTA him, but it was also a character, and when I was researching this, I was like i. was Kinda thinking about the? You don't see a lot of character comedians anymore. No like that was the sort of heyday with like Andrew. Dice Clay and Well Rodney Dangerfield and Imo Philips, and it seemed like there were a lot of characters, but now no one now it's just like. Look at this thing that happened in my life and how funny it is! All these. Shocked Travolta about my life. I'd like to see some good character comedians. I can't think of any out there. I Guess Brent Wind Back. Let's wait wait. What about like Larry, the cable guy, he's total. I assume he's a carry. Character because he started out as a completely different kind of comedian Oh. Yeah, then adopted that percentage but I. Don't count him as a comedian so. He's not watching. Don't worry. No, he's not. He's writing bad jokes. Start a flame more with Larry the cable. I'll totally take him up on. Other squash me with this sacks of money. So he adopted his character He changes his name legally. This point to Jack Roy Which? was that his father's name? His Father Stage Name Phil Roy Yeah, so he changed his name legally to Jack Roy and that was his real name till the day he died. And he was performing under the name for a while until he tried the second go and decided You want anyone to remember Jack Roy so He. He told this guy that was booking them at a club in Manhattan. Could you just make a name for me and put that on the on the? Marquee on the playbill. Yeah, or any AD. They took out so the guy who ran this place. The INWOOD lounge I think came up with Rodney dangerfield right, but the weird thing is. He actually lifted the name from Jack. Benny character like there was an original Rodney Dangerfield and it wasn't Rodney dangerfield right. Giant twist of the PODCAST. It's all downhill from here. So the Jack, Benny came up with his character and I. Think the forties, maybe or something like that. Yeah of this. Grades E, Western hero named Rodney. Dangerfield and I guess the lounge owner remembered it and came up with Rodney Dangerfield had no idea about this, so he's walking around like using this name for years. And apparently he met Johnny Carson wants one of his shows. Johnny Carson was like you know where your name came from right. Now. What are you talking about? The whole Jack Benny thing and later on he. Saw Jack, Benny and Jack. Bennie wasn't like mad or anything actually said I really love what you did with the character and you really you know you did it just right, so no harm, no foul yeah! Hugged it out. Very famously. On the second round he was, he was making a living doing okay but he got his real big break in nineteen sixty seven with Ed Sullivan. He was He couldn't get booked on Ed Sullivan. But at the time they would book other Comedians for the run throughs as like just place holders for dress rehearsal basically, and so he got spot on that and apparently did so well in dress rehearsal at Sullivan. Took note on the side of the stage, which means he went like this. You're funny. That's how you knew. It's all them and thought you're funny. Works for Nixon to do that. Great Nixon. Actually? That was a result of a huge long shot. He told his agent like just give me on Sullivan. And it played out very well ended up, being on Ed Sullivan, like Seventeen Times or something like that, and it led to all these other late night appearances us on Carson like I think a record he holds the record for being on Carson the most seventy times something like that. Yeah, MERV! Griffin. Dino like all the due to are running late night in basically where the taste makers for all the comedians were suddenly promoting the sweaty, weird coked up. Pothead Booze Hound huge potheads. Rodney dangerfield right, and he took it in Moran with it like right when he hit in one, thousand, nine, sixty seven, he got to work. That he was such a big pothead, actually the original name of his biography was going to be my love affair with marijuana. And he was serious. He wanted to call it that because he smoked body said for you know sixty something years. But well up until the day he died for. Twenty one on like he was smoking pot in Icu in the hospital because he had an early medical marijuana exemption long before. Anyone even knew it that way. He just wrote his on. I was, but if he flashed in your face, you didn't ask questions. So he got his big break. Actually Carson had blackball them for a while, because he accuse Carson in a letter of stealing or one of his writers of stealing one of his jokes, so carson famously wouldn't have him on the show for a long time until they have right until they eventually met. And worked it out, and then Johnny became the biggest fan ever, and if you want to enjoy yourself at home on the Youtube, just go look up Johnny Carson on Rodney Rodney Dangerfield on Carson. There's a lot of clips where I mean Carson was like the ultimate set up. Dude just let him do his thing, and he would laugh until he was crying I. Couldn't believe that angels getting away with saying most of the stuff he was saying on TV on Carson Zone show getting. So he's he's married. He's working a lot and he decides that he doesn't want. To happen to his own kids, what happened to him which was to be neglected, so he said. You know what I'm. GonNa do even though no one's ever done this I'm going to borrow a bunch of money. Quarter of a million and I'm going to open my own Comedy Club in New York City so I can stay home with my children, Brian and Melanie I think, and it's not like he had any money right then you know this is a huge huge risks he's. He's doing okay, but he had to borrow all that okay right, so everybody tries to talk him out of it. He goes ahead with it, and it's such a success as the loan paid off in like eighteen months just a huge success and this this club actually became venerable in its own right. Yes, still there today run a Dangerfield New York and it had this HBO special that broadcast out of in a bunch of Comedians. Get their big breaks on that show like Seinfeld. Chris Rock I. think Yeah Jim Carey. What's his face. Jeff Foxworthy. Jeff Foxworthy fans in the room reader redner of course, Sam Kennison and completely made Sam. Kennison's there and that was what He. Comedians love him so much because it meant more to him to play father to these young comics, and to give them their start than almost anything else, he really that was sort of his life's goal was to seek out talent that he thought was original and really kind of boost them up. He was a huge Freudian. Yeah. Yeah, the whole father, son, thing and So Chuck. Where we at? We are at Dangerfield's. It is nineteen eighty. And he decides that. You know what? I should start making movies. Because well. He made a few movies before that but nothing that anyone would know. He's actually cast I by Stanley Kubrick and Nineteen fifty-six for the movie, the killing the killing the killing great movie. Who Said Yeah? Wow. Yeah great movies he plays onlooker. Big Part. And then he was in another movie. What was that? Don't call the projectionist. Yeah, it was a big part in a very small movie. He said that it was the type of movie where they went to go shoot on location by taking the subway. She's probably true. Yeah I think it was, but he played the this movie projectionist boss. The projectionist said quite A. Nation and he was a superhero and. Dangerfield was this arch-villain Nemesis. Didn't go very far well, he he learned almost nothing about how to shoot a movie, because this was seventy-seven, and apparently has huge breakthrough came in caddyshack, right? He was already very much a well respected comedian, but When he when he shot caddyshack Herald Ramos. When he directed it, he said later on the. Clearly dangerfield and nobody was doing. It was a live performer, so when when Herald Raymond, said Action Rodney Dangerfield stand there. It'd be like you do my bit now. That's what action. Do your bit, and so then Rodney would just turn to the camera and like his whole bit into the camera. Hold. We gotTA. We gotta get this right here, so pretend the camera's not there one and he finally got to do it because I was the thing that just broke him out. Yeah and he hated making movies. Like you said he loved performing live in front of people, and that's where he got his his rush, and he wants compared making movies to You said you know when you make a kid. Right something one hundred times on the chalkboard and they've done something wrong. He's making a movie like he hated. Doing all these takes hated standing around waiting. Why he didn't make a ton of, but he he felt like the live audience is like he compared it to a heroin addict like shooting up. You know like he just loved that rush and he definitely get that for movies which I mean the crew standing around looking at you waiting for lunch. It wasn't as bag at all. It was not as back. You found this description from rolling stone editor Ben Fong Torres. Which I think describes him. Like to you want to read that Sir Okay so Ben Fong Torres who is in almost famous. He he had says the Rodney Dangerfield looks like a midlife crisis. There's a surface orderliness. He's groomed and he's dressed like a businessman at a convention. Gray hair slicked back over a haggard shades of Mayor Daley face. Suit White Shirt, bright, red tie, Silk, silk, stockings, China shoes, but the neatness gives way to what he calls the heaviness. Over him. Life gives Rodney Dangerfield the jitters. He's in a constant sweat. He wipes his brow incessantly tugs at his tie herky-jerky, as he recounts the horrors of his daily life shifts, shoulders uncomfortably in his eyes bug out of their bags. He moves the floor Mike around. The comedy store stage looking for sympathy, but all he gets are laughs. I. Just think that's fantastic man. He Nailed Rodney dangerfield absolutely in. His shirt and tie that came about because. Well, he hated clothes in fashion. Yeah, let's just go and say that I. Think it's time he was. He was a Slob. He said an interview how much he hated close so I never cared about clothes and fashion and was comfortable robe. Basically. and. But for one of his first acts, he put on the red in the black suit and dress dapper, and when it came for the second performance, he was like well they. They liked me in that so I'm just going to wear that. And that became his stick was. Very Dapper, looking guy who's always very well. Put together right. In fact, I just saw earlier today when he gave out a best makeup award at the think, eighty-seven Academy Awards really yeah, and he and he walked up and he sedate Nice Tuxedo, everybody right underneath torn undershorts. Feeling like was the dead truth. Probably had like holy underwear. Syria you should look that it to me and that's great I will because he basically does five minutes of stand up at Academy Awards. And it gives out in order to iron, man vs dirty dancing. Yeah, take some notes and then some dangerfield stuff. Should we take a break here, chuck? To can add break yeah. Yeah. We'll be right back after this. A Big Announcement folks. 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APP just go search for the message subscribed today, so thanks, e podcasts, eater, and principally for pushing the boundaries of the medium. Guys are doing a great job. Subscribe to the message and listen today. and. We're back all right. told you that would work. So he makes caddyshack huge huge it. He's allowed to Kinda. Just do his thing in that movie. I'm sure most people have seen that classic comedy which Josh said with stink if it weren't for Rodney Dangerfield and Bill Murray Murray, the rest of it. It's like a tepid coming of age drama dirty. Sucks. Ted Knight. He was fine, but you can watch too close for comfort, and that's as much as you want you know. I just don't think it needs to be in the movie right? I think it was Bill Murray and Rodney Dangerfield that's what made caddyshack a classic Chevy Chase Ted Ted. You feel about Chevy Chase. My father raised me to Chevy Chase. Did he really you really did you're dead in like? Oh, man still does not like Chevy Chase. Why didn't think he's finding or Yeah. Some about Chevy Chase sticks in my dad's across. Any passed it on to me. Weird it is totally that's what you get when you're dad's not avoid. They pass on weird stuff like that. So he makes caddyshack. It was a huge hit now. He was legitimate. He was sought after for movies. In the one, thousand, nine, hundred, eighty, three. He wrote a movie called easy money. we're seeing that anywhere. It's actually pretty cool movie. It's not bad. It's a little weird structurally which kind of makes sense that? He wrote it clearly did not to write a script. You know how to read a good jokes. Though so He Played Monte. Capuleti an Italian American drunk pothead. Baby photographer, because because this is back in the early eighties when any one of any ethnicity could play any one of another ethnicity sure because he was Hungary, inborn but hey plan Italian guy. That's cool. So in the movie his mother-in-law was. The inspiration for twin beds and Hated her son-in-law, and when she died, she said all right. You can have all this money if for one year I think like ten million bucks. If for one year you quit gambling and boozing and smoking in. And doing drugs so easy money was had Joe Patchy it was it was okay. Right like the first half of this movie is just a series of vignettes there where he just completely screws everything up and like your stomach's all upset and everything, and like you're really emotional, and then nothing comes of it whatsoever. And then finally halfway through the pot arrives. And then it gets kind of good actually. Yeah, agreed yeah. Lot Of build up about payoff in that one, but one Roger Ebert. Like the movie even though it was a little weird and said. Basically. The movie was about watching running dangerfield. He said Rodney Dangerfield gloriously playing himself as the nearest thing. We are likely to get the WC fields in this lifetime, right? Ride. Himself said that it was that was pretty much me on screen. That's as close as you can come to my real life in easy money. Yeah, right? Yeah, he's A. Baby photographer. So nineteen eighty six is when he finally makes back to school, which was his biggest hit. Think it cost like thirteen million eleven eleven million gross, well over one, hundred million, which in one, thousand, nine, hundred, eighty six. I mean today. That's still good money. Today dollars hundred fifty billion dollars. Place for you, right? And this one he played he. He had the idea I think he got a story credit of a guy, a father that goes back to school. Who was the big loser in life? So he goes back to school with his son to get his degree, and any told that idea to herald Ramos and he was like that's good, but what if he was rich? What if he was wealthy and had it all and still? Still go back to school like knowing what he knows now with a lot of money and riding. It's like okay, that's the movie. Yeah, it's a good idea and it actually I mean that was a huge movie. When it came out, it was the sixth biggest movie of one, thousand, nine, hundred six, that was behind top gun platoon, karate kid to star Trek for, and there's one other one that's written down somewhere and here. Movies, and it was like the six highest grossing movie of the Year in its Rodney dangerfield right. Yeah, and so he is hit it big at this time, and is a huge huge movie star in in the biggest comic I think. They did a survey in the late seventies right before his movies. With college students that said that they were Rodney Dangerfield was their favourite comic. And he was. Sixty one years old, fifty fifty eight years old, same thing basic was when he hit it big as a comedian, fifty eight years old right and like college kids are like into this guy, and actually if you've seen if all you've seen. A back to school. That's all you've seen. Rodney Dangerfield. Don't quite have the the understanding of what he was actually like. He's pretty edgy comic. Actually in pretty hilarious in college. Kids loved him in the seventies he hosted. In one thousand, nine, hundred, when when he was, I think like sixty or something fifty nine. And he started to blow up like at about age sixty that crazy. We tell a few more of his favorite jokes. I think it's high time not again. Look over a few of these. He has a great joke about. HIS PSYCHIATRIST! I told my psychiatrist. Everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous. Everyone. Has It met me yet? Classic? Let's see I like this one. It's slow, but I like it. Classes when you're alone, you fart, you say excuse me, that's. So if you haven't noticed a lot of his jokes were. They were self deprecating for himself, but also about his family he talked about his wife was dumb and fat, and his son was stupid. And even when he wasn't I mean it was all a character so even when he wasn't married, he was telling jokes about his wife. which must have made it a lot easier when he went home and I probably so. What am I favored. Wife Jokes was tell you. My wife can't Cook it all. How can toast have bones? And and your impression is getting better as we go along and drinking whisky, so I'm not saying that. All of us. Let's see I've got one. So. This is like weird and I like that in comic, just just bizarre stuff. He was talking about the bar that he was doing standup in that. Nice as what a joint as the bartender for a double, and he brought out a guy who looks like me. I miss those days man where Comedians just wrote great jokes, punchline setup punchline over and over yeah. I. Tell You drink too much. The last time I went to the doctor I gave them a urine sample ahead an olive in it. Classic and then. Another thing I learned about Rodney Dangerfield when you go back and listen to stuff. He wasn't like mean it was self deprecating. Targeting like his family, mostly nonexistent family, all of it reflect back on him, and basically what a loser! He was right. And he didn't have very many mean jokes. It didn't tell like many gay jokes. He what he didn't tell racist jokes anything like that. which is like in the seventies when everybody was telling Jerry? But. He did have this joke that stuck out to me. Are you fat. Do you look at a menu and say okay? Love, love getting laughs from Rodney. Dangerfield jokes wishes to see this. Say I think we have a new act should know one day. We'll talk about a rush. I got one more. Dating a woman she called and said come on over nobody's home I went over. Nobody was home. Good stuff. I have a new career. Reading Rodney dangerfield jokes, that's a whole. No one's done that cover comedians. Shark NATO and now this. You're all aware. Chuck predicted shark NATO right. He did you're welcome? Okay. The more you got anymore. You'd like the one about his dog. Until that one. Okay all right. My dog is lazy. He's so lazy doesn't chase cars. They just lays in the driveway, taking down license plates. All right so now we're in. Enough Stop? In the early nineteen hundred S he's making these movies. He won best comedy album. Grammy for the album, no respect beating out Richard Pryor Monty Python Gilda Radner in Father Guido Star Duty. In nineteen eighty to the Smithsonian institution, but his red tie and his shirt. In the Smithsonian. The American History National Museum of American history. Right along with Jimmy he's. Had Archie bunkers a recliner and Charles Lindbergh's plane. But the joke Rodney said was feeling after they left. They were just gonNA use a shirt to wipe down plane. Always self deprecating Andy and when he handed on this journey, so this is a big deal. I only have two shirts. May Have Been True. And also in the nineteen eighty s who remembers the Miller lite commercials from one thousand, nine hundred eighty s tastes great less filling. Man, back there has is Hanif alright. Pump. He really great commercials. They were named. It was like named the eighth best advertising campaign in history for McCann Erickson Adequacy and I went and watched a ton of them earlier today and I remember them all from being a little kid and it was weird they were. For those you haven't seen him. The premise was you would get. A bunch of ex athletes and then Mickey Spelane and Rodney dangerfield into some other random pop cultural icons at the time and to sell Miller. Lighten get into big arguments about taste less filling at the end Rodney would usually come in as the the the ship. Who Does something wrong to spoil everything crew everything up for such a weird like. And Dick Butkus and baseball players. Miscellany spelane I don't know it was so strange, but there were huge in they. They let them on. A. January nineteen eighty-four. If anyone remembers his hit, rap, single and Rodney. Because they're this, really it's something else it is, and it was a big hit. Actually it was topped sixty. Which is pretty big, top top fifty nine chuck give it its due. That means it was number fifty nine. Yeah so. It was right behind uptown girl, and it was Rodney Dangerfield, rapping about being old. Sounds really bizarre now, but like legitimate rappers at the time say the sugarhill gang rapping about like having dinner your friend's Mom's house. So it wasn't that far off the mark for the time you know like, be nice to your family. That's what wraps worry about. The good old days. he was on the simpsons I think a couple of times, wasn't he? No he was on more than once I think he's on twice, but in one thousand, nine hundred sixty played Mr Burns illegitimate son herb. Who got no regard, no regard at all. I wonder why they didn't say respect today not. Was a joke messing around. Okay? Yeah, the man himself is. They are would've been surprised if he was like look, it's one thing I don't want to say respect, maybe not boy that trying new things here. Branch out, which actually he did brancheau. He's actually really creative guy. He had live Broadway show. That ran for a couple of weeks in nineteen, Eighty, eight called appropriately. Rodney Dangerfield live on Broadway exclamation point for a couple of weeks. He, wrote a romance novel. Called La Contessa, and if you Google the image for this it's disturbing. It's basically like. Your typical ribs. It's Fabio basically with a woman except it's got Rodney dangerfield space on it. And it's available on audible I. Was it really? With Rodney Dangerfield. Reading it no way I. Kid you not what I joke about what's on audible? Well his I looked up earlier to if audubon autobiography on. They're not the only Rodney dangerfield thing on there. It's awesome. L. Martine. So you get that for free. audiobook he wrote. and. I guess he didn't direct it, but he produced and wrote the Movie Rover Dangerfield the animated classic about a dog who gets no respect. And then Mr Oliver Stone called him up one day, and said I had this role for you in a movie called natural born. And it's about this. Father, who was molesting his daughter, raping his daughter, and I think it'd be perfect for it. And Ronnie didn't get it. I was like what do you want me for this role? He's like you'll see. and. Did you see that natural born killers? You can get the scene on youtube. It's when Oliver. Stone did the Phony Sitcom. It's how they portrayed that that part of the movie. So they have a laugh track and it's it's really disturbing. It's like re layers of bizarre right, so there's so it's like Rodney dangerfield sadistic incestuous molester. But. It's Rodney Dangerfield. That's the weird part, and then there's a laugh track to just throw you off that little extra bit. You know it is very jarring. It was pretty well done, but the. The notable thing about that is that. Oliver Stone Ra- Rodney dangerfield rewrite all of his lines, and you got a lot of critical acclaim for your Bose like. Dangerfield. We had no idea and he's like seriously. If you go today, and just Google the Rodney Dangerfield of you can find a whole list of things He's such a cultural icon that phrase itself has become a thing now like petite Sarah. Is the Rodney Dangerfield of California wines. OR THE MEMPHIS. Tennessee City Council is the Rodney Dangerfield of local government. Seriously? That's the thing. Even saw guitar preempt was known as the Rodney Dangerfield of guitar pre. My favorite is palladium is the Rodney Dangerfield of precious metals. Stupid! What. Am I GONNA this up? So Chuck my now let's let's step back a second press pause. Have, the beautiful old message break agreed. Tax, season can be a real pain all right, but it's all worth it when you open the mailbox and see that sweet sweet envelope, waiting for unless it turns out that someone else already filed your return. Yeah, during tax season your personal info like your name or your social security number that can get emailed around shared a lot more than usual and criminals know this can steal that Info from your devices and sell it on the dark web or use it themselves to commit identity theft, which is why you need the lifelock, everybody the number one. One most recognized brand and identity theft protection lifelock monitors for uses of your personal info alerts you to possible suspicious activities, and if you become a victim of identity theft, a dedicated identity restoration specialist is going to work to fix it. No one can prevent all identity theft or monitor all transactions at all businesses, but having lifelock means one less thing distress about during tax season. Join now and save up to twenty five percent off your first year. Just go to lifelock dot com slash stuff. That's lifelock dot com slash stuff for twenty five percent off. Guys bobby bones I host the bobby bones show, and I'm pretty much obviously because I wake up at three o'clock in the morning a couple of hours later I get all my friends together, and we get into a room and we do a radio show. Wish you're alive. We tell our stories. We try to find as much good in the world. Possibly can, and we looked through the news of the day that you'll care about also your favorite country artists are always stopping by to hang out and share their lives and music, too, so wake up with a bunch of my friends I ninety eight point seven W. MCI in Washington DC or wherever the rotates you on the iheartradio APP. So here's some more examples of the the lack of respect in here sort of thing. The irony is he got nothing but respect from his peers throughout his career. But outside of that, though is still just doses, peppered throughout his life and examples of times where he didn't get any respect like when he sued Star magazine They published a story about him being Las Vegas, said he would drink like tumbler falls of vodka and smoke pot all day long and do cocaine. which was all completely true? But he knew that they couldn't prove it. So sued them for libel, and the court ruled in his favor right? Yeah, so that's respect right so they awarded him one dollar for his damage to his reputation and one dollar for personal discharge. The judge went. Yes. Sorry streaming. People realize it's kind he did. He did get awarded forty five thousand dollars for presume damages and. I did a little more research today on that He. Apparently salute all and Kokin Week. Apparently Star magazine showed that they didn't turn a profit, so he couldn't go after him. Couldn't appeal for more money right, so he tried to go after their parent company and it went all the way to the Supreme Court, said you. You didn't start the suit that way, so he'd been worse now base right? No respect. And even death as we mentioned earlier Rodney Dangerfield dead. Why didn't I know that I have an example for you? Hold on before he dies. He was on Howard Stern the year he died, and since I watched that interview. Man Depressing he's eighty one and he's clearly like at that store, but he still has his his sense of humor about him. But somebody called in to Howard Stern and said Hey Rodney. It's Bob Hope of see. In fifteen minutes in Howard stern is like well. That's not Bob. Hope is dead. So they were saying like Bob Hope was calling from behind the grave and see Rodney, dangerfield and fifteen. And if you can't get respect from a caller on the Howard stern show where. This is actually in that interview, which is like forty five minutes long, and it's completely depressing, so don't watch it. But not just because he was old, but Howard's trying to talk to about his childhood and stuff, and he'd just written his autobiography, really just laid it all out there like alluded to the rough life that he'd had an interviews and stuff like that, but he published this book right before he died, and it was, it was rough. Were think the saddest thing to me about his mom was despite being. Being completely neglected emotionally and getting no love at all as a child, he still wanted to be like a good kid. He still worked to support her, and like apparently came home and showed his report card. He worked hard to get good grades. She wouldn't even look at it. She just like signed it without looking, and that was the saddest part, is he still sorta defended her in that interview Like right before he was, he was dying any made up with his dad before his dad died apparently. Even though he never saw him. He said he forgave him for all that stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah, really sad stuff though. You want to hear some more jokes. Actually when tell how he died. Well in this interview in this interview, he's telling Howard Stern Howard Stern's like he's about to go in for. For the should I pretend. There's not a siren background. He's going in for surgery and Howard Stern and asks him like. Are you afraid you're going to die? And he goes? You know what dying in surgery would be the best way to go like I would go to the drug me up a go to sleep, and then it just wouldn't wake up. That's like as good as it gets right, so he goes in for this very surgery. He falls into a coma during surgery almost there and then he wakes up then a heart attack Benny. Tell Rodney these. Your feel went after that life that he had when he was so close to going the way that he wanted to go no. No specs. You WanNa hear no respect a year after he died, CNN tried to get in touch with him to get his reaction about the passing of Johnny Carson. And and if you read his obituaries, a lot of a shocking amount mentioned that he was well known for his role in the scout went in the Scout. I got to the bottom of that Oh laid on me. He was going to be in the Scout. Okay role was originally intended for him and Sam Kennison, and he didn't do it for unknown reasons and ended up going to Albert Brooks. And Brennan Frazier Okay but it was one of those things I think were one of those Internet neat things on the Internet where someone print something that everyone else Skopje's and base it, so I think one person wrote. Because everything else. That's always worth. The exact same way like listens movies as the scout which he was never in doubt, he wasn't now. Thanks for looking into that man. Sure that's what you get when you're hanging with chuck. But he did find love again in a situation in one, thousand, nine, hundred eighty, the everyone probably thought was like a typical gold digger. He was sixty one years old. Any married thirty year old woman, who was really hot blond in La but. By all accounts everything I looked into, it was not that like she really really loved them and was great for him, and they were super. Happy, together. or as happy as he could be and. It turns out that it wasn't that kind of a deal. After all made me feel good. Yeah, like for example. When he died, she made sure that his funeral wasn't until five or dusk, because he always asked her not to schedule any appointment for him before five PM, so she made sure his funeral income until after that. Funeral is a really big deal. Everyone basically came out in droves, his pallbearers included Jim Carey, who he? He took Jim Carey on the road for two years when he was a struggling comedian. The Open Forum in Vegas and Jim Carrey's getting booed off stage. Everyone hated him in writing stuck by him for like a full two years in Jim Carrey. Never forgot that Chris Rock Tim Allen Larry David George Carlin Jay Leno Adam Sandler, and then your boy Michael Bolton Michael Bolton. He was supposed to sing, isn't he? was but he was too choked up to sing at Rodney Dangerfield. They were really really really tight friends because Michael Bolton's song, everybody's crazy was in back to school and I guess he parlayed that into a trip to the set, or he got to meet writing Dangerfield, and they became friends for the rest of their life, so Michael was too sad to sing at Dangerfield's funeral and you know everybody was disappointed. But. There are a couple of people there. That were like who. It's Okay Michael We. Know you're upset. You don't have you don't have to do this, you know it's everybody will understand. That's what they said to us before we went on. So. We're going to close this with with a final nice little cherry on top about. Rodney Dangerfield and sort of his outlook on his lack of respect with when it comes to the Academy of Motion Pictures. Motion Picture Sciences. Yes. As you guys call it in L. A. The academy. He applied for membership because he wanted to be an academy in. He added credentials us in movies, and they said No. No, you had to be at least three major roles. He had thirteen under his belt by this time, including natural born killers, for which he received a lot of critical praise right and they turned them down like jerks. Even, got a letter from Malcolm McDowell. Ryan McDowell Roddy McDowell. which was Malcolm Mcdowell? He's the good one. Are they brothers, I don't know. Are they? Relation but Roddy, Roddy net was riding with. It was Malcolm, McDowell, saying it was Roddy McDowell in clockwork orange and Malcolm McDowell. That was Malcolm McDowell. Oh okay good because I felt a lot better about this. McDowell. Apes Yeah so okay good I'm glad that those two are separated. My mind because I was like I really liked them and clockwork orange could. Roddy McDowell, who everybody hates wrote a letter to Rodney Dangerfield. This rejection letter that said that He. Had Not. Had enough of the kind of roles that allow performer to demonstrate mastery of his craft. Basically, you're just playing Rodney Dangerfield and we all know it. Even though he had all the credentials to get in right, so Rodney Dangerfield, he's like. Let's see what year is it? Nineteen ninety-five, what's new, what's on the horizon? The Internet I think will build the world's first ever entertainment website, and he built his own website and. Realized that this would be a great place for his fans to come vent their anger, and it was as a matter of fact, this gate like. This one thousand, nine, hundred five, and his bands came on, and we're like to heck with the academy. That kind of stuff and The academy actually relented and said you're in man, Aaron Rodney come on what's right. And what did he say no. He, said thanks, but no thanks. He still has a website. Rodney DOT COM and if you go to that despite this earlier, there's a section called jokes and had audio clips. I was like Oh. This is great but it's not him. It's some dude reading like as bad as me a really just saying his little one liners over and over, and it's not in front of people. It's like dead quiet. Jude thing as jokes. It's really weird I can't tell you how much I love the cover comedian idea. Just. Stealing from other comics such taboo. We just need to just get out in front of disown yeah. It makes up like Mitch, Hedberg and rich little. Mind Stephen Right there in the middle. Perhaps yeah I like it, so that's Rodney Dangerfield. Star show if you wanted anymore your Sol. Clamp if you want. A fun right that was. Yeah. We had a great time in a big thanks to the LA podcast festival for having a South and police have us back. We'd love to yeah. It was really cool. We got to see other shows and We did our own and had a nice little crowd. There very supportive. Nice kind people around and look for the next La podcast. Best coming I would imagine next September doesn't sixteen. Hopefully, we'll be there. Yeah, keep keep your ears out for mention it. It whether we are not. We're that kind of guys. That's right. no listener mail from me, buddy. No, but if you want to get in touch with us, you can tweet to us. That s why s K. podcast you can join us on facebook dot com slash stuff you should know. You can send us an e mail to stuff pockets. How stuff works dot com, and as always join us at our super awesome home on the web stuff you should know dot com. The more on this and thousands of other topics, visit works DOT com. Mike I mike. Psychiatrist said you're crazy. Oh hold on. Are you mustered up? That's right like I said I'm crazy. I told him I wanted a second opinion. He said okay. You're ugly, too. He wrote that joke. Everybody knows that joke. It's a good joke. When my wife has sex, she screams especially when I walk in on her. For he wrote a lot of jokes about his wife cheating on him hundreds and hundreds of votes because he was. A if it wasn't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all. The football team for my high school is tough after they sect the quarterback. They went after his family. That's a good clean joke. That's good. It's nice. What else we got here. My drinking problem. Join a I. Mean I still drink just use a different name. Getting old at my age, shooting up means using an enema bag. I think there's one more about a dog that Oh. Yeah, what a dog I got! What a dog! His favorite bone is in my arm. This is for me. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I WANNA say that. I have another one hiding in here somewhere, but I can't find it. To the Youtube folks you have makes it. Look Ironman vs dirty dancing. You will. All Right? Thanks, everybody, thank you very much. I'm Richard Blaze, and I'm a chef restaurants, who is judged or competed on nearly every cooking show, and now I've found a way to judge on a podcast on my new podcast food court with Richard Blaze, amazing guests bring their food arguments to my court and I settle them once, and for all you. Ranch is better than blue cheese. Prove it, you hate pineapple on pizza. Convinced me the first season of Newport court with Richard Blazes Up, and you can subscribe on the iheartradio App Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is Ron Berg and you're listening to my voice, which commands trust and respect. Guess what my podcast is back and that's a win for everyone. If you're a long-time listener to the show, you probably already know the deal each week. I bring you hard hitting journalism and also light entertainment. I contain multitudes. Find the Ron Burgundy podcast on the iheartradio APP apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

Mister Rodney Dangerfield Aaron Rodney Chuck Youtube Dangerfield New York Johnny Carson Josh Clark Rodney New York City Howard Stern Reese Witherspoon Jack Benny US Sophie Tell Jerry Joe Patchy Google Mr Oliver Stone Herald Ramos
Rodney Dangerfield still gets no respect & Carnac the Magnificent is all knowing, 1979

The Johnny Carson Show

28:38 min | 9 months ago

Rodney Dangerfield still gets no respect & Carnac the Magnificent is all knowing, 1979

"Hey there and welcome to the Johnny Carson Show podcast. Today's show is from August. I nine thousand nine hundred seventy nine. I'm your host will Schreiner and we listened back. Act Too many of these great podcasts and try to put them into perspective for you. Jimmy Carter was president. All things in the country. Were good in nineteen seventy nine so we kick off our show is that always says you. ooh Johnny that was a reminder to all of us to get out of the bathroom and come in and listen to the monologue well tonight doc. Severinsen the band leader is often Tommy. Newsom mm-hmm is filling in Tommy was always the subject of a Of of a shot or two got a great shot on him about his close. Because Tommy was kind of you know a a dry wit and a good foil. Johnny Johnny got a lot of mileage out of that This show has A classic slow news day as Johnny's to say that was always a the premise for not being to top. But he had some things to talk about to do. He was welcoming the tourists and there was giving him some suggestions on what to do in town about like the southern in California theater scene and of course Janis visit the snail land. Next up he talks a little bit about Faira Faucets. divorce He has a joke. That needs needs a little explaining which China so good at explaining a joke but he saves it with great Killer joke end the bit on Farah Fawcett you'll enjoy that following the monologue Karnak them magnificent Visitor from the east as Ed but sets up so well. If you don't understand the remember the premises Karnak would give give the answer. And then Ed would read the question Johnny had always had fun doing this. Especially when the setup didn't go well or any time there was something that was just a little off off kilter ed got a great Great kick out of it and they really They really have fun together doing it. There was one off color joke. That gets a big laugh from Ed. And and there's one that bombs and Annette even says You'll hear it but as questions if johnny got it right or not. The audience is hot and cold throughout the monologue. But Ed milks when he gets to the. I have in my hand the last envelope. Well that was always a good setup for ed it was always a good reminder for the audience that this better be a good one and this one is and I guess on a show is the great comedian Rodney Dangerfield. Who We've lost a few years ago? I actually even went a to his funeral and it was one of the more funerals I've ever Attended and everybody got up and told Rodney stories and Roddy was a great guy to hang around with. He used to come in the IMPROV. All the time I sit around and the big roundtable improvisation on melrose and a whole court as we say because who as a comedian did not love Rodney Dangerfield I love this monologue and then of course roddy always comes over and sits with Johnny and then of course the model continues is but it's a panel so johnny would set up You Know Rodney on a couple of topics and if you listened closely you'll hear where he talks about How's your health and Rodney's he's not quite there yet so he takes? He takes a break. Because I'm not there yet so Johnny Oh oh okay. We'll get to that but it it for insiders that know the how the panel went. Johnny would have you know three or four topics to to ask Rodney and I guess health came who soon in the equation and of course my favorite and you got to hang in there until the end. My favorite bit is when Rodney has finished all his material there. He's got nothing and Johnny's not given anything so he just turns to the guest to his right and says So how's it going with you because it just floors Johnny that Rodney's out of material and he's already turned to the other guests. I enjoyed that. I hope you do too anyway. Here it is. Here's a another great episode of the Johnny Carson. Show podcast we've got Karnak and we've got Rodney so give give a listen. I know you're going to enjoy it. I'll see any other side and now ladies and gentleman Johnny Yeah thank you. I'll be I I enjoy. I'll be honest. I enjoyed the applause with amazing. How many people think the show is over Outta? Shoot for Billie Joe Bob. Anyway I will. Hey we got strings tonight right lots of strings. One two three four five six seven seven seven strings. Goes our budget for the month. Are you Tom Tom. Dhaka's off. Mr Excitement Mr Charisma Thunderbolt Tommy. NEWSOM only man. I know who wears medic-alert Bracelet says. I'm not dead. Trust me the you're on vacation tomorrow. You can meet and greet Tommy newsom personally. He's autographing leisure suits tomorrow at CR clothiers. Yeah we're GONNA talk. We have what we call occasionally and the entertainment busy slow news day you have to kind of make do with what the region as you can tell us a slow news day today and the La Times. The headline was runaway shopping cart. Career Ends Ladies Watermelon. Now you know it's going to be a slow news day today by the way is another historical day birthday of a famous person. You know. Francis Scott Key Francis Scott tweet see we give history also during the monologue. This is just not jokes. We give history. He was born this day. Seventeen ninety nine and everybody remembers remembers Francis. Scott key as the first man who couldn't remember the words to the Star spangled finished it and tried to sing it and never ever gonNA in many of you're on vacation right and you go to go go to Disneyland and go to the mission picture studios you make a tour of the television studios. been giving some tips to people out here because of the the gas crunch things you can do that. Don't cost too much money for example but we have some pretty good theater out here in southern California. It's not the caliber of of the Broadway theatre. I'll be honest with you. In fact there's a theater called Stratford drag on Pico. And they're having a limited engagement. There's I say you don't get the same kind of cast a run of Henry. The eighth starring Rob Reiner and Penny Marshall. Now you don't have to waste gas to see a lot of interesting things. Why go to Marineland? When right here in Burbank you can see l.? tipplers snail land. It's a very L. templer snail. And what they do every night at eleven o'clock Shamu the killer snail crawls out of a hedge and leaves a slick across Al's patio Al Templer Schnell land. Let's go to the the newseum Rosalynn Carter likes being the first lady President says she. Did you see the news the other night. She is becoming a very strong force in politics in this country entry. There was a poll that showed that Something like sixty eight percent of the people in the country did not have confidence in Jimmy Carter but we have a very strong first lady and apparently she advises the president or anything she when I told him to throw out the garbage and he got rid of his cabinet. All the press coverage of the the president's trip down to Bardstown Kentucky in Bardstown Kentucky seven thousand people turned out but if I were the president I wouldn't get too excited. There's not an awful lot to barged on Kentucky last week. Six thousand people turned out to see the butcher hangup rump roast in the window now a lot of people thought it was going to go small town in Kentucky. It was a waste of time. But actually I think going to barged on Kentucky was a pretty shrewd rude political. Move on the president's part because you all know the slogan as Bardstown goes so goes Harleysville famous slogan as soon as the president staff for they were going to the bluegrass state they stocked up on Zigzag Z.. Beeper the now that when the ban likes Jerry Brown took his first step in trying to run for president. They opened a the jury Brown headquarters Brown for president. Committee surprise. Brown made it official. He threw a sleeping bag in the ring. And the exact run. It might be good idea to have a youngster in the White House. For Change you know be gets angry. You can always holiest wrath and turn blue until Congress. It does what he wants or not. We'll be funny if the election turnout's be between Jerry Brown and Ronald Reagan. The young in the restless avenue. Sad News Farah Fawcett Majors. Probably heard this on the nose fair airforce majors and her husband Lee Majors. I apparently have agreed to split. Understand is suing a waring blender for illumination of affection. He was he was the six million dollar man. Biotic biotic attic man. See if you remember they really are funny folks no. They announced their separation during during their second honeymoon in Hawaii. Actually what happened. Was I understand the bionic man. shorted out and wine during foreplay. She had to find an all night radio shack. We've got a good show tonight later on. Paul Paul Newman will be out here. I'm sorry I'm just GonNa do a joke. He's not here. I was GONNA say the phone would be out during his racing car. And try to break the lap record around Orson Welles but you do anyway tonight. We have Rodney Dangerfield. What a great crowd we have tonight for our next guest famous visitor visit from the east all knowing all seeing hang all of the famous sears? Said's Soothsayer and former relief pitcher for the La Dodgers neck the magnificent welcome. Welcome a thousand welcomes upon your house and household so good to see you again sir. Tim is most enthusiastic suzy. Ask about your appearance here tonight. Never told me exactly what that makes him solemn him that it my three children I might mention their names solid youngest speaking of yes. We wouldn't expect speaking. It can happen speaking of children child. Four trying to have a child before trial the three could play. He's the envelope in bams. Could see this them knows that these are hermetically sealed. They've been kept in as jar on funk in wagons porch art since noon today. No knows the contents of these but you and your divine and borderline mystical way will ascertain the answers inside the question how he never heard the answer before. I love it when intense resigned below number so one would be proper hermetically sealed. I will give the answer having not seen the question. The answer this question. Seven double o seven the seven. What is energy secretary? Schlesinger's IQ DRACULA AND THE OPEC Nations Dracula and the nation's ages named do things. I WanNa suck you dry. In the wake of Karnik will entries on Gary Coleman Gary Cole- What is Wilt Chamberlain look like from the Moon Karnak Crime Karnak act the clean up pregnant camel. Rapper water over your marital bid Nicaragua Karaguanov. Why'd you what? Should you be careful not to do when you shave around your ugly. Five Hundred Laps described the Osmond family sitting down men aroused heard of yaks lasting commitment to your sister. No fooling what do you say one housebreaking a circus clown it really hit into Bedouin. bedpan Dan Roller Skates and Brown pyjama tops. What is Linda Ronstadt where to bid the escape from Alcatraz and rookie named movies and Fred Silverman's future at NBC? This school fever disco fever. What can you get if you use the same toilet? Seat is peaches and herb. Butch Cassidy was the daughter that hop along never talks about hot flash what flesh. What do you get when you expose yourself in front of a fireplace to hold in my hand? The crowd that would watch Bambi through a sniper scope the fire one fire to fire three describe president. Carter's last cabinet meeting the. Here's a very funny man but it doesn't help he's still he's still gets no respect. Would you wanna I want to tell. I'm all right now but last week in rough shape you know I mean the last week my wife. She signed me up for a bridge club. Jump off next Tuesday. It was rough you kid last week I looked at my family tree two dogs. We used it tell. You can't relax your no. We'll place I felt like having a few drinks. The bartender says surprise me showed a naked picture. My Wife my wife is always something. Her father died shutters body frozen. Every time I take a snacky force how to refrigerate in my wife could do nothing right well last week. Correct the crash into a tree. She said it wasn't her fault. You Poodle Sean. What a driver? She is over. The dashboard is a pair of shoes. Hanging belongs guy she hit. They couldn't one out. Some guys stole a car. I said to look like she told me she got the license plate number. I'll tell you what me nothing comes easy. Well last week it went to the track and field and gun to kill my horse. The last week I got stuck to a new book one hundred ways to make love how you ended up in. Traction action was a misprint. I never had any luck with girls. Anyway I know I'm ugly ugly and went to a freak show for nothing my wife. She don't go either in when she gave birth. I asked if I should be in a room. What does she said what phone I got pregnant? You WanNa Room with me. Since I'M A kid. Women always gave me a hard time. Signed my mother never breastfed me. She told me she liked me as a friend. My mother had morning sickness. After I was born. Tell you when I was I was a kid. I got no respect at all kid. No respect from anybody anybody. At the time I was lost in a beach cop and we look for my parents. I sent a copy. Dick will find me subtle kid to so many places that could hide man. He didn't help either. The tunnel was kidnapped. This like a piece of my finger. He said he wanted more proof. Could've went through plenty of my uncles. Dying wish he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chill today. No respect last week I was GONNA jump up my window. They call the priest talk to me. He said on your mark the I always have a good time Respect in your livelihood is over. You know it's really nice. Great crowd here. Serena hasn't been John Nice seeing always good time in Hawaii good. What's new in my life? I Dunno nothing new so just trying to keep busy working around trying to visit. Pardon Pommy Zero Hilton now. I Not Be Back in New York tomorrow night. The lobby there Thursday Friday and Saturday. The club working in Dangerfield's then I'll be a new England way next Tuesday. I'll I'll be in cohasset right outside of Boston told me and I'll be there could have been worse uh-huh I'll be up there August seven through eleven that he's south shore music search. WE'RE NOT GONNA be up that way too aren't you. I'M GONNA play Framingham anyhow. Chatto Deville you like. If they're nice people up there Jimmy. In fact I'm a friend of mine getting touched up a good guy. We've got no. He runs it all night trek game. He's the hello. You gotTA break of it. You can't bring on the big time I'm going. It'd be the place where we've been for my life Minnesota in Bloomington Minnesota one thousand lakes. That's right it'd be a lot of lakes over a thousand two thousand lakes. I'll be there. I'll be at the cotton celebrity liberty in Bloomington Minnesota Lincoln Minnesota certain places so far out in the woods my acting to be reviewed in field and stream manage the bears remember. Joe uh-huh I keep Bischel business rough shoe. That's why that's a hobby would mimic my money. My regular job. I sing a national anthem. It cockfights you know. It's a rough last week. My Fan club broke up. The guy died. Aw meet all kinds of people better guy in Vegas lists because working in wild guy from Texas as a big ranch down. He told me his ranch. Does your sixty hands working asked him why the Gay Ranchero Shit. You're all right. YEA nothing but sometimes people to class like a lot women sometimes they act so classy to go to the bathroom Shabazz's I'm going to bet. She's GonNa pout him. I know if that's what her nose a lot of trouble beat your strategy but last we have problems dream girl three months ago. He's going nuts. He didn't know what to do what what happened. The rabbit didn't die. It just stays in critical condition problem. I was talking to my brother today and actually I send my buddies my half brother. We have the same parents. He's just that way as wild having a brother who's gay I'll tell you it was kid and I tell them on the family tree section. You could kill. Everybody has problems. John Kid my meat you my marriage on rocks again. My wife broke up with her boyfriend. Madge always been shaky always day. I got married. That was a beauty. Everybody everybody was crying during the ceremony. Mother cried hotel. My wife cried. She got undressed. I cried I mean. Health is important. So we'll get. Take time out of my chemo. My kid forget it we it could get worse. I don't talk to my kid. He's a mean kidney he put crazy cool my preparation H my daughter. She's no bargain either. I in public school. She was voted most likely to conceive. It could still gotTA watch out for drugs bad drugs so many kids are using cocaine. Cocaine is very big. You know I mean kids today. They don't want to read about Snow White. They want to shove it up. Their nose always something new generation. Where my dog too? She gives me trouble. I got a female dog. Emma she wants fifty biscuits the female species rather it. Johnny terrible terrible. What happened today by PUSHUPS in the nude mouse trap? The quick pressure Johnny's birth. My hope is your L. Dollars Bug. Yeah that's the one I'm not kidding. Mom Getting Oh oh I know. I'm getting old when my legs both kick blue prairie fire holidays No my age. I want to girls at once and if I fall asleep. They've got each other to talk. Aw I assume you're back in a minute the what was I right. I mean that bit with Rodney at the end made me laugh laugh. Hope it made you laugh. I hope you're enjoying all these podcasts. I hope you get to download them if you don't Listen to them live and we hope you give a favourable review on one of the places where you get your podcast cast anyway. I hope you enjoyed all this. I'm we'll Schreiner. I was a comedian. I was there with Jani many times and the memories that come back listening to these. PODCASTS are fantastic. I know you're gonNA enjoy them week after week as I do and I hope to see you next week another Johnny Carson. Show podcast see you later.

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 Wearing Capes For Personal Reasons

Friendshipping!

41:14 min | 1 year ago

Wearing Capes For Personal Reasons

"Friendship is proud to be part of the Chicago podcast cooperative. This episode is sponsored by cards against humanity. They asked us not to read an ad enjoy the show, I'm Jen. And I'm Tren this friendship ING and the theme. This week is being good at saying those words word to saying things. Good best words, Jim tweedy events has many businesses that sometimes they raise drama, and you wanna calling quiz. Don't right. Visa or dates? The. True. And I did the unthinkable this weekend. What I did karaoke. No, we wait. Hold on. Yes. What kind of carry? Yes. This is a very important. Thank you for that. Perfect. Follow up questions. She's beautiful and she's smart people. Oh, okay. So it was Korean karaoke. So that's the room. Yes. Exactly. Which is why it is so much better because you shut in a room, and you get really hunt Saudi which is what happened to all of us and with your friends, and you don't have to sing in front of strangers or perform you can just sit there and dance or you can get up and sing one song with the help of like three other people I love and to me that song was everywhere by Michelle branch. That's wonderful. You're everywhere to me. So we're they everywhere to you. That is fantastic. I just feel like the one person standing up and putting on a show version of karaoke only really works for people who can really sing in theater kids. Yeah. Exactly theater kids need that shit. Yeah. I did it out of your system. That's an appropriate place to get it out of your system yet like the Korean version where you're sitting and there's like four microphones being passed around. And somebody got. Arena and somebody's got harmonica. Did you have like a Coon from all we did not? But I did a slap my knees. It was like I my own little instrument, your the it's got Jen ban on percussion. Gen vein. Eating fries in the corner. Jen, I m. I am sleepy beast. I took Zad coil which is equal in American. But my partner's Canadian, and they say Zad quill, I still don't fully understand this. Etienne language things these equals, Ed. Yeah. And so okay Zaza top, you know, what I was going to talk about like being tired. But honestly, let's talk about this weird shit. I so zebras zen zebra says, Bruce, they're probably not. But let's say they are said birth like he says AD said, oh my God. I know like an absurd words right now there is there's this plant called z plant, and I was trying to describe it to him. And he's like, oh, I want to Google. It is easy plans. Like, how do you spell it like Z? I like, no, no. It's just as easy. And he goes so Z E so Zad e e no just Z z. Gosh, how do you guys? Get anything done in said that I never okay. So the word buzz. Yes. Besides it was it. That's how it works. That's the king's English. The word Ditz dessert. The it's kinda like I hate this. And I'm looking up scrabble. Oh my God. There are a lot of Z words in here. I use. How does he say the word I soon this comes up a lot? Beastie L E V C allies. I just assume this to wear the or best bastardized bastardize. So vast dudes said this this this this is not working unless let's just go into the question. Okay. Let's do it. Okay. So we got some questions about small talk. Here's. Just put together we have questions about small talk and talking to another and we're very bad at it. We just we just bailed out of it. We were just like, you know, what this isn't working pack. It up move on. You wish you could do that. That was yesterday guys, my friend who babysits often recently told me that she babysat this like sitting this like six year old and they were like sitting at the table having conversation while he was like eating cereal. And then she asked him a question. He goes where we don't have to keep talking. I'm done talking now. And she was like, oh my God. That's so good. Why can't lead you though? Oh my God. So okay. Just to recap Jen, and I had failed banter. But now we're going to answer your questions, and we might fail at that. Too about talking. Okay. Hi friendship. I understand that you should ask lightweight questions and not tell your whole life story to someone when you first meet them. So what are appropriate questions for someone you just met? How's the weather seems boring? And I'm worried that anything else, I think will be too much. I don't want to be too much. I want to be exactly enough, please. So okay. There are many situations in which small talk is perfectly appropriate. Even. If it feels boring small talk is necessary. It's a necessary evil. So people can feel out if they are comfortable or if they need to Cape. Yeah. And small talk isn't appropriate in every situation. Sometimes the appropriate thing to do is to not talk to the person at all. Yeah. Man. That is always like the disclaimer of our entire existence trend, right and meet when trindon I do panels, and like, what is friendship ING. Why did you do this? We usually say like this will help you meet friends, we hope, but here's our here's the thing. You don't have to have friends. You don't have to meet people at this convention, you do not refund. Anyone who's rude to you? And in this case same applies. You do not have to make small talk with everyone. You really don't. And I think that one of the reasons why people hate small talk so much is because it happens when they don't want it. So small talk in happen. Like, if you're trapped in an elevator with somebody small talk can happen when you are doing an interaction with a waiter or waitress sometimes it is best to be perfectly professional such as like, a you. When you're talking to a customer service person. That is not the right time to ask. How's the weather? How you doing and being in an elevator? This is a transient experience. You're not gonna see this person. Again, small talk is for when you are starting off a not even necessarily relationship at starting off an interaction when you're starting maybe leading into a deeper conversation, small talk is not really for people that you are paying or can escape. Yeah. So like, it you can say, hey, how are you to barista? But you can't say, hey, how are you? Where'd you go to school like they there's probably a line behind you like they need like you can't take up someone space and time if they don't have a reasonable polite way to dismiss you. Right. That reminds me of another great best unit of small talk, which is the conversation that you have with your hairdresser. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah. So that's another. That's a situation where small talk is perfectly appropriate. You sit there you have to sit there. It's one on one. You can even say something like, oh, you know, what? I'm really tired today. Is it? Okay. If I just don't out. I mean that that happens too. But that's one of those professionals spaces where small talk is appropriate. Even though it's not what we just described. My hairdresser always asks me if I have any trips planned for the year, which I think is a good question. And I'll tell my answer. And then I'll reciprocate the question. He's always got the most amazing trips plan. He's going to Greece. He's going to Prague he's been to London for eighteen days. So that is a really good example of a good small talk question. Yeah. Like it it worked it worked like a good small. Todd question can be a question that you have a very good answer to because it gives the person you're talking to an opportunity to they have an easy question asked, which is what you just ask them, and you already have your answer lined up. Here's an example of one that did not work with. My hairdresser loves going to be here done like the Friday before Christmas. So like, the the mood was festive people people were leaving work to take like twelve days offer something so people were like getting ready for the holiday parties and stuff like that. So he asked me to go into any parties tonight. There was no, no, no. I'm not actually. And then his answer was I've gone. I've been invited to five tonight. Why we also told me one of them started at midnight. And I was like I don't know hundred respond to this without insulting this person. Right, such as are you kidding me? Or why would you do that? Who the hell does that? Or why did you get invited the five parties are these celebrities? Are you lying? Does the other thing is that? So there are plenty of times with small talk where people make shit up. I remember one time I was on the on a plane to New York with my mother, I was fifteen years old and a gentleman was sitting next to us in the aisle seat. My mom is in the middle. And I was in the window, my mom, and I had so much drama mean, we could barely keep our eyes open and she had to field questions from this guy the entire high in right? Oh, that is one of the escape that you know, what I was gonna gonna like Blake make this into like a tail like what had an ending with like a moral conclusion. But I am so distressed thinking about. And having to deal with small talk when you are drugged. I don't do it. So your question going back to it was what are some appropriate questions for someone you just met? Okay. So I like that used the word appropriate because there are definitely some that are not appropriate. Let's set the scene so the traditional Smalls conversation through traditional appropriate small conversation happens in a place where you've got two people who are equally free to leave and who are equally interested in potentially speaking. So this could be your in a big group of people, and you're at a conference, we've got a tweet to PECS east bunch of games and industry conferences coming up. I'm sure that there are industries that have conferences in this season as well. This is the travel season. Maybe you are in a bar where there are people who want to milk up. I don't know. Like, what do young people do? I don't know. Well, there are there. What I'm saying is that there will be appropriate situations where you will talk to people. Okay. So first off introduce yourself. Yeah. When in doubt, introduce yourself and say her name. Hi, I'm Benji. Hi. I'm toby. Toby diaper men. Toby t diaper, man. Yeah. I mean, there's always the moment. Where like does not always the moment. But often in situations. You're like, I kinda know that person I've seen that person before they probably don't know my name. But I know there's just introduce yourself just assume no one knows it can also say like, oh, you look for millier. I think as we haven't met before I'm trend. Yeah. Oh, man. Plus, you are helping people around you if you say your name because other people will you know, that really relaxes people when they when they are reminded of your name without having to ask if I have met someone once before or zero times before I will always start off with saying my name, and you didn't even give a little bit of detail. So if you're at a conference, and like say, it's a mix or at a conference. Hi, I'm Trent. I'm here with Kickstarter. Yeah. That's good. Give some context. Yeah. So who are you here with for? I'd never say what do you mean? I'm here. I'm not. Part of cards against you know, right? That's like oh 'cause. Who? But I you could say a few things are like, hi, I'm trend. I'm new here. I haven't been to Boston that often in from Chicago. Are you from room? I like that. Yeah. That's good. Give people some information before you ask for there's I think that that's a good way to start off. And they just decline. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So let's let's talk. So introduce yourself. You know, what we should've talked about before introducing yourself. What the setting and body lingo? Yeah. Yes. So I wrote down two things to consider when you are making small talk one is the setting that is literally where you are. What is your place if you are volunteering at a food pantry, and it is extremely crowded, and there's a long line that is probably not appropriate for small talk. And the other thing is body language if you were at this food Bank and someone is carrying a hot fat of gravy. That is probably not when you stick out your hand and ask how are you? That is when you ask can I help how can I help can? I can I can I help carry. That's when you stick your hand out and put it right in the gravy. Can I put my hand in this gravy? Then you lick if you for asking, yes, you may. You like your hand they hit lick the gravy from your hand looking directly, and there is very intensely. That's perfect. I mean that covers setting in body language. I think turn just gave some perfect advice. So other body language to look out for somebody who's just milling about like, you know, eating something or drinking a drink. Someone mingling mingling adults to have parties where people stand around and hold drink. Hey, standing parties I like sitting part? Yeah. But I guess there are you will be in so many standing parties in your life, even a wedding a wedding starts off with standing with Stanton than sitting. And then standing in the sitting and dancing in the sitting exactly church a smile. They may smile your way. Yeah. They might hold I contact. And then just say Hello. Yeah. You need the whole tech to the swiftly look away. You don't other thing to consider is if people are looking at their phone, or if they seem board that is not an invitation to interrupt. I agree. Okay. I have a theory. You know, how men loved to tell women to smile. Yes. And that has not gone away. But there's like this new fun trend were men till women to get off their phones artist me twice twice. And it's it's in the same tone of voice that one might say, why don't you smile more? It is don't you ever get off your phone who is saying this you strangers strangers? What? Yeah. Yeah. By passing by like one time, I was waiting for. A cab and I was waiting for camp. But I was like at a bus stop. And a guy said that to me, you know, bus stop not seeking of setting not a great place to meet on. Anyway, don't assume people what your small talk on my God. Can we talk about this phone thing? What do you? So let's talk about. I think it's because I'm young looking and I'm a short person it will. So here's the thing though. I want to think of a good response to get off of your phone. That's not go. Fuck yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Don't tell me. What to do? Yeah. I mean, the last time a hoping to smile, I said don't tell me to smile, and it didn't do anything. Like he kept making conversations, it sucks. And then I walked away. I think maybe the thing you said was stupid or just no, yeah. Not now. I keep thinking about like really shitty. Small talk interactions. I've had like one time. I was putting on some makeup before a vagina monologues performance in college. And this guy with his daughter. His young daughter was like four something was he says to me is like you don't need all that mango. Oh. And I said something I didn't hear business. I said something like don't have your business. But I wish I was just like. It's my face. Yeah. Look what he's need makeup. Nobody needs makeup choosing to put it on. And that's not up to you. We'll your choices aren't to be respected trim. Oh god. Sometimes a hey random men. Oh, random men. I like the question. How do you know the host if you're at if you're at a party or setting or something like where there is a host? I think that's a good question to ask. Yeah. If you're at like a work conference. I mean, we're do you work seems like a little presumptuous? But like what brings you here? I was just about to say what brings you here is a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I tried not to assume anything about another person's job or livelihood or anything because it can get you can just be so wrong, and you can reveal your your biases, which I hate. Instead of like, what did you major in? You should ask like did you go to school? Plenty of smart people have not gone to school in there in weightless debt than I am. I like what do you like to do? Yes. In how they like to spend your time. Right. Instead of what do you do because in increasingly, you know, younger professionals the line between what you do. And like what you do for a job. And like what your hobbies are can be blurred. But that's a good way to broach that topic. I feel like yeah. Because they can kind of pick and choose they can pick the answer. They like the most somebody very insecure say like, oh now, they're all boring stuff. I don't I just watch TV. Nobody really means that though. Yeah. Yeah. Turn out insult yourself. When you're making small talk like do you have hobbies passions is like, oh, I don't do anything. Like, oh, do you have a dog or cat or a kid? You you have something you do you do have something that you're that you like talking about yet. And if it's watch TV all the time are you a survivor fan. Yeah. Then I have something to say to you, which is too. So let's talk about some things that you don't want to say turn I've covered this topic couple times throughout the. Years which is don't don't do the third date conversation. Yes. Don't go to deep small talk means not big stuff. And I think people will hear that. And be like, yeah. Of course, not. But let's talk about what that really means. Like, a good one is what are your tattoos me? That can be very personal. Yeah. Yeah. I like that the asker did acknowledge that you you don't tell your whole life story. But also don't ask questions that require that person to give away details. I may be very personal. Yeah. So like the tattoos question your tattoos mean? Oh, man. I remember one time I went through a TSA line. And I had my sleeves rolled up. And this guy was like, oh, you know, what I'm gonna ask you. Oh, chris. And I had no idea. Yeah. And it was like why what do you mean? He's like, you know. And I was like I legitimately. Don't know what you want to ask me. Can I get into Canada? And he's like what are your tattoos like what about like an wave else? Oh, their personal they've personal meeting or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Which is a really good way to off that conversation, usually people. Stop ask polite about it. It. Yeah. Yeah. That's a really nice answer. But yeah, like, I get why you want to ask where the mysterious scar came from where did the mysterious? It's shaping lightning bolt on your four hundred. I get you want to say like what got you into wearing capes actually Cape question. Totally. That might be a good one. Ask actually. Yeah. Yeah. That's what this is tricky. And they might say it's personal. They might say I wear capes for personal reasons, and you respect that. And you can also like tie that into a compliment like, I love your style. Yes. Think that's awesome. Not. I dig your ass. That is very different. Yeah. Yeah. When in doubt, if you're going to well when in doubt, don't do the Cullman on someone's appearance, but if you are practice, and you you've done this before and you feel confident you can couple someone's appearance by combining choice. They've made. I really liked your sweater. Where'd you get it that's much different than that's what our hugs your every curve things. Like, you know, what you just seem friendly or something like that? Like you. You seem so friendly. That's so sweet. Yeah. I've mentioned the airport. Many times already in this conversation airport is worth things. Go down though, it is I spend a lot of time in airports, and occasionally somebody will come up to me asking me for help. Because I think it's because I looked kind of looked like a teacher like I'll be wearing like a cartoon again, or whatever. And also like I'm a white lady. So like everybody finds me very nonthreatening. And somebody said you seem like you could help and that is such a lovely way to like full. In a compliment into talking to somebody. I love that. So like, you seem friendly. I heard you laughing across the room, and you seem to be having such a nice time. I thought I'd come over enjoying you guys. Do you? Oh, that's so good. Yes. A really good one groups of people are easier to talk to you than totally agree. Especially at like, we we bring up like, work, conventions, and conferences and stuff. That's usually when I find myself. I don't know anyone in the room or I just know one person. And that is when I take a swig of red wine, and I just go join a group and say, hey, I'm going to crash this for a little bit. Yeah. Can I can I join your crew for a little while? I know nobody. Yeah. Yeah. And say it with a smile on your face because you know, you could be a little self deprecating without diminishing yourself. If it turns out, they're not exactly your vibe, just go to the bathroom, and then go to the other side of the room. Yeah. There's something to be said for I'm going to go. Get some more water. Yes. Yeah. Make the make the casual escape. Yes. Absolutely. And then hopefully, you'll be adopted. Yeah. Adopted will you guys a duffed me into your friend group? Get kind of your temporary stepsister. Let's talk a little bit more about stuff that maybe should steer away from more at least try to little carefully. I would say try not to swear. Oh that is such a good one. And I'm bad at that. Yeah. Very common. Like, it's. Yeah. Yeah. That's very good. You don't know anyone's boundaries or their beliefs or anything. So why make them uncomfortable? Accidentally right? I think people listen to the podcast. Probably no I curse quite a bit. It's just like I pep are my my language with it. But in small talk that can make people feel uncomfortable. But it also can be a wink in. And what I mean is you know that moment where you're talking to somebody from work, and they dropped the f bomb for the first time. And you're like, oh, you're a person to. Yeah. Yeah. Who'll so when that does happen, it feels like another like mini step here, man. I know what you mean. Like, there's a moment where someone says something, and you go I could be your friend that happened to me the other day when I was picking up Matvey from Matvey my dog from doggy daycare. We take our a couple times a week. She has so much energy that she just can't stay home. When the why she will terrorize. Sunny, west picking her up and Matvey was wearing a red bandanna. And this woman that was like giving Matvey over two meals. Like, I just love that Matvey worst different bandannas every day. And I was like, I know she's so fashionable and she was like I just bought a banana for my dog too. And it's a pride bandanna, which is so funny because they don't even know. And I was like, oh, we could totally be friends. Wanna pride bandanna for your dog? Hello like, that's so me. So like, there's a moment when you reveal something about yourself, and it just clicks man that reminds me so I had this old friend that I hadn't seen for fifteen years backstory as habitat for humanity as a teen and he went with and he was like the older kids who kinda like knew what was going on. So I was like fourteen he was like nineteen or whatever. And he was a very like big brother kind of dude. But in seen him since I was like fourteen or whatever was in a store, and he was working there. We had known each other through the context of doing habitat for humanity through our Catholic church, and he had a pride watch strap on. He's like, oh, do you. Remember me like, very, let's talk about how we're so gay. And it was great awesome. You can find your people, you know, what the little moral. This story is is when somebody is like wearing something. I think that that's a choice that you can bring up. Agreed. Yeah. Like, you're megadeath shirt. Bring it up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think could be a conversation piece or like, I like your checks. Do you like Jimmy world? That's not that big of a leap, actually, really you probably do. So I guess like all in all it seems so hard to think of lightweight questions. But really the the boundary is just don't dig too deep. You want to massage the surface. You don't want to shovel into the core. I think that's exactly nice visual to also don't massage anyone. Yeah. Don't touchy at and you know that no touchy. So question to let's do it and Trent I'm so excited. And I'm so scared me to I'm going to my very first fan convention, very soon. And I can't wait. My favorite comics, creator of all time who shall remain unnamed protect the innocent in all caps. We'll be there doing a signing. And he's literally the whole reason I decided to go. So I'm meeting my hero. And I don't know what to say to him. I want to tell him how important has work has been to my life. But like, he doesn't know me. He has no reason to care, right? Should. Should I tell him stuff like personal stuff? I don't wanna be that fan. But I also don't want to miss an opportunity to think and appreciate a person who has been important to me in times of wo-. Do you have any tips? Oh, do we ever. We super do a solar wheelhouse. Okay. So it is not an appropriate to tell this person that their work has been lot to. I think that's totally. Okay. I think that's lovely craters love that. If I know anything about creators, it's that they believe like one in every ten compliment. Yeah. So like, you could be the compliment that they actually believe and take the heart of went. And isn't that worth taking the chance guiding might be fewer than that? Yeah. And plus you said it's a fan convention. So that is an important note. Here the creator is opting in to interface with fans, and you mentioned assigning. So that's even more like something they signed up for something that they put time in their scheduled to talk to people. Yeah. There is stuff to keep in mind, though. Like keep it quick, especially if there is a line. Oh, yeah. And if there isn't a line actually, keeping a quick I think is good for like any interactions. You have with human being like the more. You can kind of condense things really the the better because you are respecting their time in their presence when you do that. Yes. So don't don't do the thing where you linger don't linger near their table oath barnacle booth by don't barnacle there yourself onto them. I think that's Pat bears. Yeah. That's what he calls it. So like, a so you mentioned that they're doing assigning, which genyk completely agree with you like they blocked off a time four interacting with fans that is what that is for any would not be appropriate. It for you to bring something to sign. The difference would be if this was say like because you know, she said comics creator, and oftentimes comics creators will have like a table in an artist alley or the booth and that is where they'll be putting business at the same time. It's talking to fans, and so you kind of have to be very aware of everything that's happening. You can't get in the way of business transaction because this is how they earn a living. And if you want them to keep making comics you need to allow them to sell things so a booth barn. Call is somebody who sticks around that table for just like way too long? And sometimes they will do that after receiving some soft nose or or you know, being kinda shuffled off. And it's just another way that you want to be aware of how much space and time you're taking up because they are there to work. Yes. Yes. There to peddle their wares. And you are not. And also you mentioned the uneven power dynamics of you being fan in them being creator. But also acknowledged the unfair power. Of they are in a business. And if they look bad to you or if they react negatively, you might stop being a patron of them. That's true. And they're they could be there on someone else's dime. Yes. Or not they could be paying their way there too. Which means they probably really want to take advantage of every minute. They have right. Right. Right. So you said that their work has gotten new through times of well. I don't know how much detail you're gonna wanna go into specifically times of well because people are not all equipped to deal with that kind of information about somebody. They don't know. Yes. Most especially in a crowded convention center. Right. But anywhere to out on the sidewalk if you see them, or if you spot them on a coffee shop, you don't I don't think you should go into detail. What your is? You also don't know what their triggers are. So even though they are powerful important, and they are creators, they still are people. And if you're talking about I don't even wanna mention anything, I don't want to trigger any of our of our audience, but mentioning something that is significant. Emotionally, traumatic to you can be significantly emotionally traumatic to somebody else. So I hate to say this. But I think that you should gloss over with the details and put your emotions into your adjectives. Instead, Jen, do you wanna do this? Oh, I would love to can you be the creator. Yes. I would've I created all a mess. I'm great maleness. Oh, I know what you're I want you to be a rockstar like I want you to be like, you know, in Scott pilgrim. He's got the axe. Who was like a singer vaguely? It's been awhile since I've seen that. She basically it's pre Larsen and she essentially plays the lead singer of metro sure. So you're very cool. Oh, cool. Like, you're all pretend really cool, and you wrote a song a deeply emotional song that most people assume is about an abusive relationship that you had in the past and getting through it and being like really strong in. I obviously that spoke to me because of my shared experiences. So we have. I've I have an understanding of your background. And I know a lot about you. But you don't know anything about me right scene. Is this good or bad? It's going to go. Well, so here's the thing. I can't see a situation in which the creator is going to be mean to you. Yeah. Except if they are having a really bad day or a dick. Yeah. They could just be a could just be a dick. But they are people, and they are they're at work. So they might be impolite to you. We can get to that for now. Let's just assume neutral to positive okay because and just for the asker like it will almost definitely be neutral positive. It might be a tiny bit awkward. Yeah. But it, but that's fine. It is inherently awkward you're asking like you're talking to someone you haven't met. But anyway, let's hi, hi, it's Hello. I'm trinh. Oh, hi. Thank to meet you. I I know your name, obviously, your gender Andras. But I brought this record few assign. If you could please, oh, I'd be happy to let me get out. My sharpie. Thank you. So much. I just wanted to say since I've got this little opportunity how much music has truly meant to me. And I know that people probably tell this to all the time. I just wanna put my name on that list of people who've told you how amazing you are. Thank you. We have some shared experiences from what I understand about. You know that banger that you put out lady is so awesome. You know, ladies, so awesome. Yeah. I'm familiar with that song. Oh, yeah. You've wrote it. I did right. Yeah. Top forty hit lady so often. But I just want to encourage you to continue letting your personal experience Cheyne because it really spoke to me and got me through some hard times. Wow. Thank you so much for taking the time to say that thank you so much for coming to Chicago. I can't believe you came to see too easy to. Yeah. I love I love Chicago. Yeah. Okay. Almost you record back. It was really nice meeting. You and thank you for saying. So many nice things. Yeah. Cool. See that went. Well. Right. You got you got your point across. I got my point of the nice things were said, I loud myself to be a little overwhelmed and awkward a little she. And till Lutely. That's what they're there for, you know, and it's okay. Like, they again, they have this is almost certainly not the comic creators for signing. No. No. No. No. And yeah, I think that's a good point like they might be overwhelmed too. But I think that is the perfect time to say something nice just do this again with you. Are Jen dangerous. The. The world renowned fiction writer, and it's really long line. Okay. And I'm near the end of the line. Okay. Okay. And if we don't hurry the people behind you might not get a chance. Yes. Some being ushered away gas got it. But also, this means that I've had a lot of time to think about what I want to say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, hi, Jen dangerous. My name is Trent. I would love it. If you would sign this book for me place. Oh, sure. Yeah. It'd be happy to while you take the time to sign I just wanted to tell you. You're work is incredible. And I know you hear it a lot. And I'm sure that these exact words, we owe mimicry someone behind me. But thank you again in can I shake your hand, shake hands. I'm gonna don't be offended, but I'm going to put some pure L on afterwards. It's not you. It's just the convention. Oh one hundred percent. In fact, let me take a little squeeze that. Oh my gosh. We shared pure L. With Jen dangerous. This is the best. Never wash that hand. Oh, you just did get one. I'm sorry to rush you the I wanna make sure everyone gets a chance. But thank you so much for taking the time to say something, so nice. Absolutely. And your line is long because you are great. Oh my God. See like if that also went well that's supposed to go badly. It was supposed to be mean. No because like tied a little rush. Again. Like, I just the the context of a person knowing they're getting into this like, I think if any ask her if you take anything away from this like, the comics creators, not going to be mean. Yeah. I just don't see how not in this not when the setting is designed for this. Yeah. Another thing about the setting that it just occurred to me pay attention to the rules of the signing because they may not have been set up by the creator, some conventions are like you can't bring anything to sign that wasn't bought here. But they'll those rules will be made very clear, and I'm sure you'll be aware of them. They're not necessarily rule secreta even likes, but you should respect them. So I actually 'cause played as rose red from fables at sea to a really long time ago. See Tutu's, just a comics convention here in Chicago and the one of the decree. Fables was at the con. And I actually got in line. I was the last person in the line because I didn't know it was happening. I just you know, and I didn't have anything for him to sign and he was like I have to sign something for you. You look amazing. That's so cool. And I had a sword because she is a sword. And so he signed my sword. You know, that's also and he actually remembered signing my sword. Like I saw on Twitter. I think that if you want to have a positive like unique interaction something like that. Yeah. Absolutely. The signing will go. Well, I really think it will be fine. If you see your favorite crater after show hours or even during convention hours. They happen to be with like their children or they're having a one on one conversation. That's like the people are are close talking to someone don't do the thing where you haunt nearby like ghosts. And like wait for their time. I know it's tempting, but what could happen is a line could form and that could be really bad. It really really awkward supporters needed dash off. I will never forget seeing we'll Wheaton at my first time at gen con. I remember that in haunts. Me how disturbing it was. There was a literal line of people following him. It was like it's like he was a Caterpillar. There was a line of people snaked around the convention just following him. Where everyone the will Wheaton parade fucked up, man. It was very very shamed. Yeah. I mean, we feel so weird even see it. So I mean, I guess the moral of that story is that you are only entitled to the time that you are given in the line. Yeah. Exactly. I mean, honestly, it may be more that you need to write a really good fan letter rather than you want to get this interaction out in a sign. That's true. That's a good. If you have a lot to say, and again, we we still think maybe don't go to personal, but we still lean on the side of being more cautious in withholdings personal details because you don't know what could be triggering to them angry. But yes, a letter an Email might be more procreate. Yeah. And then, you know, and then I I in a big part of that is getting that out of your system. Even now, I'm not saying that it's bad to want to share how somebody has helped your life. I reiterate that time is at a premium energy as is at a premium. And if they wrote something that helped you in times of whoa, then it's probably something sad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Or uplifting, but dark grey. Yeah. And remember that even though you feel an incredible kinship with this person. You don't know this person that will right? And that does not mean that does not diminish their work or your connection to it. Maybe even makes it stronger knowing that you have something in common with this person. But remember that they are a person who gets hungry, and moody, and smelly and might be a little bit sick. Everyone gets sick at conventions. So all this to keep in mind. Your hero is still a human. Oh my gosh. That reminds me one time I was in line for Jeff Jack's, I think it's how you say his last name who makes questionable content. Nice and he was rubbing his wrists. Being like oh, gosh. You know? I I want any shows to I want to draw something for everyone. My hands just hurt anyone's like it. And I remember somebody like four people behind me shot I have been gay. And and he's like are you hitting still light full and like he gave him some Ben gate? And like, we all cheered. It was like outstanding. It's awesome. What else I've got some good like cute fan stories like that. I met Michael Phelps a couple of times what a couple of times more than one. So I I was a young teen in the two thousand four Olympics. And I just became obsessed with it. I just loved I loved watching Olympics that year, especially swimming. That was like his first year where he was super super good. So I went to swim meet in the couple of sweets in the years after the Olympics. He was so nice. Like, I remember the story of teen gen being really into Michael Phelps? I don't. So you met him two-time. Yeah. So I met him at a swim me like he's doing his thing. And this one meat when you like did amazing. He lives like he like he he went up to like or his fans are sitting and goes Albie back, you points. I'll be right back. So you'd like go down and whatever. And then he came back, and he did he was signing stuff. And then the second thing that happened was at a difference will meet I was like already met him. It's all good other people should meet him. But I went out to lunch and he just walked in the restaurant. And I was like I can't be here. So I was actually with my dad. It was very cute something my dad, and I bonded over was him. Take my dad would drive me to swim. It's because I couldn't even drive at this point. So I was like oh my God, dad. That's Michael Phelps sitting right there. And my dad was like, no, it's not house. Like yet is I can't believe it's him. So of course, as like Michael Phelps and his crew of hot women and men because they're all swimmers were sitting down we were like getting up to leave. And my dad passed by the tables. I just want you to know my daughter's a huge fan. And he and it was like, nah, he shouldn't interrupt someone at lunch. But it's my dad so like that's gets does mom's gonna pass to embarrass her children and in passing being motor loves you. Yeah. It was on the way out. And he was like, oh my gosh. Thank you so much. It was very cute. That is really sweet I have another. So one time I went to go see cursive at like, it was a college show some college. I didn't go nowhere. And I was getting lunch before the show with all my friends and at the table next to us was Tim casher and cursive, and like their girlfriends or whatever and my partner at the time had a cursive tattoo, they had ugly organ tattooed on themselves. And and we were all like freaking out really quietly. Like, what do we do? They do and this is before cell phones. So we couldn't like sneak picture. Yeah. Yeah. So so my access like putting lure arm by the bet like scratching trying to checks at least. So so so funny, but what we ended up doing because we like we all decided it was like eight of us. And we decided we are not inter you're not going to bother them not gonna bother them. We're going to see them play show in like an hour. But when cursive left the restaurant, we all wave, and we're like, we love you, guess you at the show a bit. And then and then they all like laugh my Chrissy later guys. That's really cute. It's really really cute. The cutest India. Reactions with celebrities happen when you remember that they are people and not just the person who created offering. Right the purse. Yeah. And the best ones also happened quickly. Yes. So I know I just want to back up little bit. I know and we can wrap up here. You know, when I said don't interrupt creators through with family having a private conversation on the other hand. How cool could you make that person look to their friends? Okay. This woman work for a free Larson. But if you ever see me in Chicago, and you don't come up and say, I recognize you I and I'm with a group of friends, you gotta fuck and do it. Remember that one time someone in Chicago diner, recognized you like that is oh my fucking God this up the opportunity to make me look cool in from my friends this sweetest person in the whole world this waitress. I was having just like lunch with a friend. And she's like, I recognized your voice from friendship Ingmar huge fan of the show. Here's a cookie just. I mean, we're talking about that. Yeah. Sad is amazing. And it was such a like a sidebar to. Yes. Like, it was because she was our waitress, and she said it in the beginning would have been like a little weird like it would have been fine. But I think it was better because she's like I realized it as we were talking. Here's a guy. Yeah. Yeah. Very good. Okay. So this is going to do I'm going to tell a story that I have heard, and I believe to be true. I don't have enough time to Google it. And we're gonna leave it in either way even stories so good. So Rodney Dangerfield and Frank Sinatra were like kind of buds Lebanon, like tight podcast. They they were having a show together and Rodney, I think it was opening up Frank Sinatra and Rodney Dangerfield really wanted to impress this girl. So he's like Frankford creek if you can help me out here, I'm gonna go talk to the the blonde lady over there. And when I do was like, you know, just come over and like him say, hi, oh, I don't want her to know. I know you I think it will impress her. And he's like, oh, yeah. No anything for you, buddy. Nobody deal. So Rodney Dangerfield talking to this lady and like Chattanooga, Albert ever and fixed and comes by. And he's like, oh, oh, hey, Rodney. And like, unlike oh, who's your friend and Rodney Dangerfield goes not now Frank I'm having a conversation. Oh my God. And Frank Sinatra just like like like kinda like walks away, and like laughs it off or whatever. But like, isn't that the best thing you've ever heard could? I hope that story stories true. Oh, man. I will Google it after the episode really it. So Jen go to a meeting and also this was episodes over now. We're just talking about celebs though. We're having fun celeb- time. Here's the morals, raise, you probably won't mess this up. Yeah. You'll be good through your best talk to them like a person. And everybody who listens to friendship is very emotionally capable anyway. Whatever your perfect, this has been Frenchman with Jen and trend if you want to follow us on Twitter, you can do friendship. If you want to send us a question. Please. Do we are actually I think we need question. Do we could use some more new ones? Yeah. Yeah. It's the old ones. We have if you send a question, and we haven't answered it. And now we're asking for questions don't be too offended because there are many reasons why we haven't gotten to it one. In might not be something we can do and to just be too fucking long, or it might hurt us, or my what the questions are this happens to close to our lives. Oh, yeah. If there too. Close to our lives. We're just like good luck guys because we don't know either. Fuck if we know. I you to parliament for editing to Lorne Gallagher for designing to Alex Cox for making the studio work to Monica Verma, four being our agent and to Molly Lewis for singing and to all y'all out there for listening. You're welcome for talking.

Jen ban Chicago Google Michael Phelps Rodney Dangerfield Cape partner Twitter Michelle branch AD Trent Frank Sinatra Matvey Jim tweedy Etienne Bruce Frankford creek Olympics Toby
Caddyshack With Bill Simmons and Sean Fennessey

The Rewatchables

1:41:33 hr | Last month

Caddyshack With Bill Simmons and Sean Fennessey

"Today's episode of the rewatch ables on the ringer podcast network is brought to you by spotify where they have the best podcast listening experience. Imagine they just added a daily sports podcast go on spotify. And you search for daily sports or you'll just see it on your APP gives you a little snippets of different sports podcasts at the ringer dead that other people did mixed with US music. So interesting strategy there and it's going to be cool. I think daily sports go look for it now. Coming up. I'm. GonNa put right on the line. There's been a lot of complaints already fooling around in the course bad language smoky grass poor caddying caddyshack is next. Some people belonged the Bush would country club with the was eating steaks too much junkie was. Son Belong the stimulating conversation. And some just don't belong. Join His crummy snobby Taurean caddyshack starring Chevy Chase Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight and Bill. It's the snobs against the slot in Eddie Shack rated. R.. All Right Sean Fantasy is here. My Name is, Bill Simmons. We've been circling this meeting for a long time. I once wrote maybe eighteen years ago that if I could only take a dvd of one movie on a Desert Allen, it'd be caddyshack. It is now forty years old summer nineteen, hundred, eight blues, brother's airplane in caddyshack all released six weeks apart three seminal comedies that were watched and Rewatch, and we watched and released and re watched. So we wanted to one of these. We decided to caddyshack what his caddyshack me to use Sean fantasy who man it's my favorite of those three you just named for sure I think it's the pinnacle of the Post Animal House American National Lampoon Comedy. I think it's the number one. Voltron of comedy geniuses coming together for something that is not a great film and isn't amazing movie and there's a big distinction there, which I'm sure we'll talk about. I'm shocked after forty years have goddamn entertaining. It's still It's so good. There's so many scenes. It does it drag I like all of it I laugh. I. Love. Ted Knight. In this movie as much as I've liked any movie character may be ever Right. So I read that a couple of things 'cause it's hard to just dive in the CADDYSHACK I. Have So many things I talk about it's a kind of easy experience. Big Picture. Wise. See Got Bill. Murray you've Chevy Chase if Ted Knight. You've Rodney. Dangerfield? Four guys from the last fifty years who for whatever reasons to doubt in some way from comedy standpoint, you could argue all four of them peaked as comedic performers in this movie. I who that's okay. So definitely Chevy for this to me is Chevy at his best. This is my favorite. Chevy thing we talked about fletch earlier this year I think he's incredible. This is basically Rodney Dangerfield first movie yet, and probably his most iconic maybe back to school is neck and neck with it but back to school, he's basically doing that guy with a son. Yeah. So I I feel like this little groundbreaking for him, Ted Knight his best movie. Mary Tyler Moore is. Probably the Pinnacle of of Ted Knight but. This is his best movie Bill Murray where I trip on it a little bit they. This is the funniest Bill Murray stuff, but is it the best bill? Murray movies at the Best Bill. Murray experience is a better than ghostbusters groundhog day what about Bob I dunno mate stripes you know stripes comes a year later probably not the the peak of bill for me no I think you could even say stripes a year later he's better. I. Think if you're just going pound for pound PR, laugh moments for movie previous. So we'll go three and a half just taking them one at a time Chevy who we talked about on the pod and this movie is basically the audition tape for fletch. He just takes three Thai web scenes and he's like, Hey, what see the lacy under all comes over to his house. This is just by differ fletch to see see of that but he's at this point of his career where he's you know four years out from SNL. At this point, the movie career hasn't gone exactly the way I think people had thought and then he's in this and he's perfect. Bill, Murray is still on SNL when they're filming it, he is in the shadow of Belushi inaccurate but we're about to head into the season where those guys are gone. He's about to take control mess. Now he's going back and forth between the two places, but is not bill Murray yet, and that's why you know. I think he he's not considered the lead when this comes out Ted Knight is. On an iconic common in the seventies, right? Probably. Probably, the biggest other than mash of the seventies I would say the second biggest Sitcom of the seventies or maybe all namely. Yeah family taxi there's a handful but yeah, it's it's right up there but we had seen removing dangerfield is just a stand up comic and it just catches these four people at kind of the perfect point for all them. Wait you. I grew up with this movie like I I went to this movie I saw it with my dad in Brooklyn when I was ten, it was one of the first nude scenes I'd ever been in the feeder for all that. But you showed up later this movie was already established. What was your first memory caddyshack? I'm my dad is a big golfer and he was a big kind of we weren't a country club family. We were a public golf course family, and so the world of the country club was not accessible to us. But this the the genius of this movie is that it somehow a blue collar comedy in the confines of this upper upper class experience that everyone's having. So I I think my dad was probably just watching it one day and I started watching it with him and you know it was on constant rotation on cable. It was always accessible and always findable, and you could just tell right away like built the comedy of Bill Murray especially as Carl. You can understand that if you're six or if you're sixty, you know the thing the voice, he's doing the way that he's talking the rhythm he has his magnetism, which is almost indescribable. You get drawn into it, and then as you get older, you start to realize like, oh, I'm seeing the unedited version. Oh, there's a topless girl. Oh, there's a lot of cursing. There's you know the pool sequence which is usually edit out of the TNT version of this movie and you start to see that it's like really high level Raunchy comedy. So I I kinda had stages of experiencing it from the safest most neutered version all the way up to the most explicit version. And it's in that wheelhouse of a really weird comedy era from starting with Animal House. Going all the way through to about eighty, four, eighty, five where Are Suppose. Really funny but we're also supposed to be low Raunchy you had to have the obligatory nude scene. That stuff. I think this movie executed that from that whole era I think this is the best of all. Talk porkies I think it's better than Animal House all the way through I. Think it does the best job in it's funny because it's such a disjointed movie. It is. The love child of cocaine. Basically it's Cocaine had a baby, it would be caddyshack. And in the scenes are just completely incoherent description coherent. It doesn't really matter especially when you seen a million times. The second big picture thing. I think this movie. Influence. The way. Everyone after it would play golf just in their day to day life. More than any movie influence a sport like there's certainly no basketball baseball football version of this there's so many one liners in this move in there. So many different moments. and. If you're on a golf course, it's almost weird. If somebody doesn't say caddyshack line at some point like happy Gilmour has a tiny piece of this corner for the next generation but I. By far. Yeah. It definitely is I think that the the jokes are so esoteric, but they're also so baked into the dialogue like I. I'm not sure if I was on a golf course for the first time before I'd seen this or not. Probably I probably saw the movie I but even just no, no, no, no no no, no, no no. No. Just hearing that you would just hear that on a golf course and try to understand what people were talking about. It just felt like it was part of the Lingo of the sport or like if it's raining and I think that the heavy stuff stock going to come down for a while they're just like. There's a different golf situation for from every piece of this movie. So I think that's one of the reason it endured I. Remember when I saw Tiger Woods did something with him in two thousand six for a video game any room for fifty minutes and he was talking about how it was his favorite movie and he's been pretty open about that over the years but it's it influenced everyone from the generation that came out and then the tiger generous should no question. And it just kind of kept going I think now it's starting to die a little bit because the movie feels sold in a lot of ways I mean it really it really does feel like it came out in nineteen eighty certain parts even the way the caddies wearing their t shirts and Ajay, you know there's no cell phones. It. It feels distinctly rooted in a certain air but at the same time, like my son would watch it then still have fun watching it. You know think about it like this when you saw this movie for the first time. It's pretty similar to if Ben Watches today like use seeing Casablanca in the you saw caddyshack I mean think of the the amount of time that has transpired in movie history and how far we've come and how much movies have changed. And this movie is like it's like you said in the in the first big picture note like it's just really kind of glued together. You know it's not really It's just a series of genius sketch comedy and stand up and Sitcom actors just throwing a hundred for an hour and forty minutes, and that's really all like it hardly a movie and but that wasn't supposed to be the case it was supposed to be a movie. There was a big coherent story and script and the movie just changed a lot when. They were making it because they had those four guys who were such geniuses and they've got really lean into this and it basically has all the comedy DNA from all these different pieces of the seventies because you have. Doug Kenney who's involved in this was his last movie he died shortly after but he's the national. Lampoon like that whole Speier cofounder of of the of the magazine and Everything Yeah You have Herald Ramos who eventually becomes a huge comedy director this was a launching pad for it you have the SNL guys. Murray and Chevy. If Ted Knight. WHO's the throwback to this old school way of comedy Kinda present live in the near Dangerfield as the stand up comic it was him and rickles. Were kind of the two that had never had massive success but all the other comics thought they were hilarious and then you even have Brian Doyle Murray builders brother who who wrote the movie and he's tied to that whole second city seen. So it's basically dipping into every scene right as all them are trying to figure out how can we make more money from this comedy thing? And there are all kinds of in this together and try to do it Ted Knight want to go back to him for a second. Your Guy Well. It's he's kind of on to borrow a golf phrase. He's kind of on the last couple of holes of his career as a performer, right? Yeah. Yeah. He's eight months earlier he filmed the to our love boat movie. Ten nine not red hot. Yup. and. He's under I mean this is going to be a great who won the movie, but it kind of rejuvenate some and ends up getting too close for comfort out of it and has this renaissance from it. He's he's the only one that even if like in nineteen eighty like caddyshack bub-bubba. Oh Ted Knight, he's with this, but he's so essential to the thing but this movie ends up rejuvenating him. It basically creates Dangerfield as major star It reinvents Chevy to some degree because I think he's tapping into all this stuff that eventually becomes his mid eighties renaissance and then for Bill Murray like he had this meatballs. And now it's like Oh Bill Murray's movie start to so it does all this great stuff for them for out Ramos Tragically Doug Kenney ends up dying in Hawaii a couple of months later he was bitterly disappointed this wasn't a massive hit they thought this is going to be animal. House that that three, hundred, million, dollar movie it. So it is a really a sad story and there's a good book, Doug Kenney and his life called a stupid and futile gesture which then they adapted into a movie a few years later on Netflix. And he such a fascinating figure. He obviously co founded the National Lampoon. He participated in on my house he participated in in this movie. He basically it sounds like he wrote most of this movie and most of that script and the making of the movie got thrown out and he tried to write a movie that was the story of a bunch of it was more of John Hughes movie than ultimately was a Raunchy comedy and he was trying to portray the lives of these young teens. And these guys who are trying to figure out what to do after they get out of high school, and then you realize you have six days with Bill Murray and Carl sackler all the sudden becomes the second or third most important figuring your movie, and then that means Danny Noonan gets brushed. Aside, I, mean, the the Ark of Danny Noonan's character in this movie is freaking weird as every other teenager and I I think in part not just because the movie wasn't that successful but because. They didn't make the movie that Doug Kenney wrote. You know that is ultimately what they put out and it seems like he was really heartbroken with that. He had struggles with cocaine just like everybody else in this movie and he you know he has this incredibly tragic and strange death where he goes to Hawaii to Grachev. Chase. With Chevy for a few weeks and so he goes with Chevy Chevy Leave Hawaii, to go back for some work and he leaves Doug by himself. And Doug apparently goes to a cliff in Hawaii in. Hawaii. And Slips and falls and tragically dies nobody knows it was intentional or not. We'll never loan. It's unclear if it's suicide, it's unclear. If just slipped nobody knows we knew that he was going through this very difficult period in his life after all this creativity and success, and so he his even though the movie is so goofy and fun and lighthearted there are a couple of tragic and unusual circumstances in the aftermath of a to. Well. It was a well reviewed. It would cut okay reviews. They're kind of mixed the movie did well, it did do animal swell was like seventeen in nineteen eighty wasn't a disaster but I think he was thinking this is GonNa be it for me I'm GonNa. You know I'm going to be a major major guy and it just didn't happen and you know everybody's doing drugs back then and I think he was one of the early casualties. But it's part of the legacy of this movie that. He dies, and then as the eighties go along this became dist-. Became the movie. This was you know when I was in college in the late eighties we had this movie we had animal house Stripes there's you know there's like five or six everyone just had on VCR. Some of those faded away animal house became dated pretty quickly. This one hung on probably the longest of I would say all the comedies before like the John Hughes Era I think this one's had the most legs in it's still on like it still you know it still does. The tour, it's still super watchable. It's one of those movies you can dive in different parts like Oh. This is this part. I'm sticking with it. So I don't know when it finally fades away but I, I think it's still kicking I think it's the thinking to producer Craig knew it and likes it and he's still into it I think he's SNOB. A SNOB but he cares about golf if you care about. Is. It's part of the you know the sort of initiation process into getting interested in golf as a teenager. This movie is a right of passage. You have to watch this movie and to get the jokes to get the culture to be a part of it in a way that like. Beverly, hills cop might not work for people anymore you know people are not interested in stories about cops Eddie. Murphy doesn't hold the same stature for us the Blues Brothers same thing. The Blues Brothers is like kind of incomprehensible as a movie. Now you know it's like so these geyser, the brothers and they're in a band, but they've got to like save something and they gotta. Their crazy friends around Chicago like that's just that movie doesn't really make sense with caddyshack. It's like they're on a golf course. At the end of the movie, Somebody's gotTa win in somebody's gotTa lose. It's easy to explain even the movie is mostly incomprehensible to that b-batty point. You know you're getting to a final showdown and it's a sports movie that's eight. It's only sports movie you have heroes and villains to yeah. Blues Brother's I watch recently it's actually a little underrated now because I think it had become so aged in. Kind of incoherent that But. Then you watch and like there's great scenes, them movie like the aretha Franklin scene is is lights out fantastic and there's like five scenes like that where it's like Oh. This is why that movie was a big deal. quickly. There's great research on this movie that would set guys named Chris. The shadowy Nasha Wadia? Shoddy. Sorry. Sorry Chris I don't know if that's right. So apologies to Chris either way he wrote a great book about this movie. Yeah. He wrote a book a couple of years ago and he did a sports illustrated piece to about ten years ago but there's been some other ones too Raymond. Said about the Kenny. He said. I remember the New York Times called it an amiable shambles of accommodate. Doug was very depressed to substance abuse was peaking. Someone said to me you can never get enough of what you don't really need Doug kept going to substance abuse for comfort. There's no comfort there he went to why with Chevy. Chevy came back Doug didn't. So the movie made forty million bucks cocaine was a big character in this movie and there's a lot of stuff in the oral histories and features about this Danny Noonan played by Mike O'Keefe. Said cocaine was driving everyone it would be lunch and someone would say do aligned yes. Sure. It was no big deal. This is the seventies. Peter Burke Rot the guy that I think Bill Murray held the pitchfork to his neck. He said cocaine was the fuel that kept the film running. And then held Ramos said Cook Aim Business in south. Florida. was mammoth everyone is doing everything. There was some concern from the studio someone in the accounting. Department leaked to the studio that everyone's taking their word, the ends in cash, which is unusual. So, if you like these stories, I recommend the the book, but the jokes in the scenes I think ultimately. Are What gave this a forty year put shelf-life. But that the thing that I love in the reason I think it's the most reliable comedy. It's definitely one of the five most re watchable comedies for me is all the nuances. There's so much subtle shit going on like. A had a list of some of them. Like Lou. The caddy master just they throw in he's got. He's got an obvious gambling problem because they start that they is like, yeah give me say plus six the sixers who stepped on a duck I feel like became a running joke for forty years but Roddy Kinda Thurs that in I love Mrs smales limping back to a room after the boat Chris thinks she's got her shoulder ribs. I love with loose starts climactic badge and he goes your honor your honor. A Carl back or spitting in his own living room. Kara the how they said Karl Lip Balm had to abandon the scholarship because he died in summer school for Miss Vera anxiety attack. To. Have her camps the old couple. As somebody who caddied for three years those are real couples that you can't afford that they. It's actually a good GIG 'cause they're hitting it forty five yards per shot and you don't really have to move and you can kind of hang some of the names which will get to later but I mean Mitch. Come. Stein is the high comedy. Funniest thing. It's a funniest thing the homeless. I fell down laughing again watching yesterday. Taiwa explaining why didn't fight in Vietnam that that whole thing house we'd be done no Wang the photographer like there's literally fifty things I could just keep going and going and I think that's ultimately why this movie as lasted for. So long because every time you watch it, there's three things that you're like Oh. Yeah. That was really funny. I forgot did that yeah it's just on overload and You can tell that the guys in real time or improvising, improvising, improvising, improvising, they're just coming up with bits coming up with jokes. We'll talk about I'm sure I, mean know the Dalai. Lama speech almost every Chevy says in the movie all that stuff is is is riff material you know like we've talked about the appetite comedies on this show a few times and how appetite creates this environment where You can try stuff that really starts here with these movies and the inexperienced that all these filmmakers had I think really just played to their advantage Ramos had never directed a movie before you know most of these guys had barely made movies. Chevy is probably the most seasoned film actor on the said although Michael O'Keefe is coming off of an Oscar nomination for Antena coming into this movie so even Though he's a young guy, he does have some experience but you know Rodney's ever been in a movie before and Rodney's just doing. It's like he's on the tonight show on a golf course. You know he's just doing his material in the movie and it's Great. So it's all kind like happy accidents or environments that they've created whether by dint of inexperience or cocaine that just makes. It's so fun. You know that's a good point about the Improv thing in the connection to the appetizer. I have no idea if this is true but this is certainly the first movie I can remember. Where they openly talked about how the the actors improvised entire scenes. You know we'll talk about later but the same Chevy Chase and bill. Murray. It's in the movie because they realize right the talent of the filming that they don't have a scene with those two guys in it together, and they kind of on the fly Ad Lib. This crazy scene where we're tie web for some reason is practicing at night and hits of. It's a golf ball into their Bill Murray's caddy apartment, and then decides to play out and they're just hang out for five minutes. It makes no sense it's coherent. The the the setup for that scene where he has to go knocked the ball out of like a fallen tree, and then he hits it into bill. It's so confusing and giants like how did we end up here? Why is tie here? Why is he playing right now? Wears is the why did the movie just stopped dead in its tracks? It's actually a terrible setup for credible seen though, but and to your point about the nuances that I think you could do a Zapruder film style breakdown of everything that happens between Murray and Chevy in that scene, it's their energy is fascinating. It's it's When he spits it fucking kills me. It's his own place. It's not like he's outside but you know tie earlier in the movie it's established. She doesn't even keep score when he plays Golf. So now he's like, Hey, play through can I play off your Bong like incoherent? He's like Chris. Ryan and that way you know he doesn't like to write down the number you know it's it's too low doesn't want to me he doesn't WanNa hurt anybody's feelings. Roger Ebert gave this movie two and a half stars out of four. He wrote caddyshack feels like a movie that was written rather loosely so that when shooting began there is freedom too much freedom for it to wander off an auto actions in search of comic inspiration. Yeah. That's exactly right Raj you should up that by by star. It made forty million dollars and there's so much to cover that we are gonNA. Go right to the categories right after this break. Let's talk about blue apron home cooking matters. 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Very important right now with blue apron enjoy delicious home cooked meals. Check out this week's menu. Get thirty dollars off across your first deliveries. When you visit blue apron dot com slash rewatch one it's again blue apron dot com slash re-watch blue apron feed your soul. All right most re watchable seen. This is tough because there's so many many scenes that it's like, what's a scene? What's so I try to do the best I could hear starting with Thai playing golf with Danny. You. Take. Drugs, Danny. Everyday. Good. You take drugs Danny every good. What's problem I don't know. Did you have to take that cooter preference test. Would you be the ball? I'm not talking not talking not saying anything all day lights out and on. Sad love Chevy Chase. So just seeing him in a movie like this and nineteen eighty coming off like this legendary. When year s no running out, it was just like nice to see him on a golf course I could have watched I could watch danny adding for Taiwan for an hour. next one the country club dinner. Now I. Guess Technically, we could say the Dalai Lama seen in here but I had that in what stage the best 'cause it short it's like a minute way we're going right to the dinner. Yeah. Why had some more than what stage the best I tried to split it up? Okay. This is so confusing. I don't know what to spoil not despoil them. Okay. The Country Club dinner includes judge snails outfit. which I don't even know how to describe he looks like. Like a locomotive model unlike some train set that your kids would have or they say, he looks like a Lego. He looks like a a yacht captain in a comic book. It's just completely absurd. Yeah. It's great. It's just great. This is where Al Servic throws all all kinds of heat. He he rips off in about a minute. This steak still has marks from where the Jackie was hitting it that somebody stepped on a duck you must have been something for electricity and now I know what tiger young it's all within a minute. He's just firing like machine then A. Disaster when tied needs. which is really funny and I thought they had really good chemistry in their seats together. This includes spalding drinking the half done cocktails with. So fucking funny and am sure you knew too. But we were always those couple of kids in your life who did that at age fifteen to eighteen who would just kind of per hour on the wedding or the you know at some point in night just kinda searching for that the half and coke let me ask you an important question. Have you ever accidentally drank? Cigarette but put out in it. Probably because I have in it is fucking disgusting. That's the worst. It's the worst and spalding vomiting in the in the corvette is is. Very well, that's out and so and then randy dancing has that to you wanna make more dollars hardest way. Cal, that stuff next one baby ruth bar scene seen? On There's some there's some nitpicks that will get into later with that scene but it was kind of the money shot scene in the movie originally when Carl seen that in the theater when Carl, it's the baby ruth bar. Like absolutely brought the house down like brought the house down people lost their fucking minds. Judge smells his wife Fainting all that stuff tying Lacey's date. He's just doing flach for five minutes and it's great and he's completely adverse mind and my only nitpick is where was the cocaine because there obviously was a big pile of it and one of the rooms entice house but. It. I tried to look you up, but there wasn't listed for Mr Wonderful with spell ended ease. Price Price Price. On Turn. Calling. Listing for Mr Wonderful, what the spelling us? Sorry about this mess your the whole Vietnam thing. Say Your, uncle bless collies a song when he's singing it's he's just so coked out Alice. To love you as boats, Rick your face. That's bonkers, but it leads to Fletch I feel like I want both. Onto. I was. Too. When you were more to roping neighbors. Yeah. You're crazy. That's what they said about. Sam. There's very visit says all heaters it's just he's just throwing heaters the whole time there's no. None of the characters are really interacting with each other in a human way. Like a the main, he's four. Honor for no reason. That's like what is this is this? So. It's great. It's really funny and he yeah. He crafted like a comic persona that we basically never seen before he's like the highest level asshole who you like and yet that was very unique. Yeah. The I made this its own scene I guess Al Lama shot near to 'cause. I. Kinda cheated with I put the Lama. Let's put Di Lama in there to the whole Dow Lama Star even though it's only a minute and then Cinderella story I have into the greatest round ever because it's like those next to each other. I'm a bunch of them together see the Bill Murray. The famous Cinderella story had nowhere where former greenkeeper about to be but then right after that is the bishop going, Hey, will you we carry my bag for nine holes? I keep playing I don't think the heavy ships. Required a while. John Reid anywhere the good Lord. Would never disrupt rob. Barry keep playing the have come down for a while that whole thing. So that Combo I'm combining those so very underrated part of that sequence obviously the Cinderella story speeches iconic in you know also I think he completely just invented on the spot Harold Ramos gave him some pitch that was just like just thinking about the final minutes of a basketball game the way the announcers talk and he told him like a child. Yes like pretend you're like six years old British young should rela who's come out of nowhere he's got about. Three hundred, fifty yards he's GonNa hit about a fiber expect teaching. He's got a beautiful vegetable. Oh he got that one. Got To be pleased with the crowd is so that's incredible. But then when the bishop comes in grabs him to caddy for him in that round, you know the Bishop is that's Henry Wilcoxson. Really. Kind of an iconic actor of the nineteen thirties and forties was one will be Goto guys. He's a great actor. He's in Mrs miniver and the greatest show on earth. He's in a ton of like Oscar films throughout the years. He's kind of like a I'm trying to think of WHO's a good calm for him. He's not Philip Seymour Hoffman, but he's in that kind of like high level character actor zone. Anywhere Huffman. He's a very well, well, well respected actor and his last line, and I think this is his last performance. As he struck by lightning is rat farts. He screams to the sky rat farts and the know 'cause you you forget he's in one more scene where he's gone to the dark side. Why when they when they decide to make the bet. Oh He's drunk at the bar his I think his last light is there is no God judge is like. What's wrong with you, Suzanne? They just through that Eddie. Complete Survived the lightning strike amazing God Kara walking away and leaving him on the course to is low key. So under eight, but he's on back. The we mentioned tie running into Carl. Which? It's just cannonball Canon ball at all the stuff that's going on there. There's a million things I. think my favorite part is when he's like you should come over sometimes. So what's your address? Your Embraer rates if he's like Yeah Yeah Brian. Fryer that's that's where I have. Everything my favorite line from that exchanges. He's like you're playing pool is like yeah we have a pond in the back pool or pond. Good for you. Here, yeah. And then my last one. I really tried narrowed then the. And this is my pick 'cause this. This makes me laugh. The hardest single time is the sales kid picking his nose in the guys betting on it. fucking destroys. Me Made Me Laugh I. was ten. It made me laugh at my twenty s and in my thirties in my forties now I'm fifty and it still makes me laugh. My favorite part is when they do the double or nothing that eats at an eat say, Oh man and one of those guys. What are the guys? Dead peds Hey sangre. De. Eight hundred. Thursday he was hungry. You wanted it thing. The thing about this movie is it has all of the different types of humor has sarcasm. It has satire. It has gross out humor has broad comedy. It has subtlety like it Ha- it does all the stuff you want. I. Love The the Black Guy I don't know what his job as he takes. His Guy Gets Mad at Ted Knight the attendant. Yeah. Yeah Yeah. He's the one kind of running the action on those picking seen. His come on. Oh They hit. It just fucking high comedy any other watchable scene for you. I I guess we can put it out cervix entrance I had that and what stage the best. But the first time Tam everything he does in that when you jumped to the restaurant I was gonna say what about Al arrives at the country club with Wang and they're taking the photos and he's in the he's in the shop and he looks at the hat pack and then he sees smells wearing the hat that's just an incredible looks good on you. This is the worst looking out. I saw. This particular pole, the super. Oh it looks good on you though. I like what he else weighing. He wakes taking pictures. He's wearing it's a parking lot. Dangerfield is great I'm turning what else? What other good seen I mean it's notable that we don't have any scenes. That with with really with Danny or with Di Nunzio or with Maggie or with any of those characters were not really even though that's theoretically the movie we're not pointing to any of those and that stuff is not bad. It just doesn't feel like what is most memorable about movie I'm going with either this meals kid picking his nose or just tie running carl because that's such like an unbelievable scene in it. So weird and their ad-libbing everything. So I love my choices I I'm going to go with them Carlin tied together in Carl's outhouse because it's it's like it's like when you get to see. Lebron staff. Teamed up in the All Star game and you're like, we're we've only Cisco this one time. We may never see this again, these two guys playing together in this way and we don't they probably don't even like each other you know and Murray and chase didn't even really like each other. They had some animosity. Do Stephan Lebron leg each other I don't know but seeing them play together means it could be something special forgot to mention that they had the famous fight backstage. Right before chase was about to host SNL like two minutes right for and ain't got really really ugly famously ugly. And they just were considered like keep these guys out of the same room together. So when they ended up on the movie and then that was probably part of the reason they ended up not even having them in scenes initially. So. Before we get into what saves the best Special category. K. So. Let's say it's what's age the best Ted night edition. Well were waiting that's on there. I'm just GONNA go through chronologically. He's in the country club and the two guys are playing poker. He looks at everything goes don't you have homes? Just utter stayed fuck. It kills me. I love when Lacey has that joke about falling around he's like. WHO Would ever. The I know you nothing. Well, the world needs ditch diggers to. Konak would things I wanNA hamburger cheese you'll get nothing like it. The his speech when he's Christie and the boat when he does it when a short ser- to sue tighten the seat and he's like. He's like killing himself laughing I've sentence boys younger than you. The Gas Chamber didn't WanNA. Do it felt like I owed to them I don't even know what that means. Why did feel like you? Had to go to the gas. Jaber is it was revealed that he's a complete asshole, his his sociopath. ARE YOU MY POW MR scholarship winner how about a FRESCA? So when I was in college, how better fresco was a running joke not just the my college I've felt like how better fresco was like an iconic thing that people just said to each other and I'm not even sure people to the movie lansing more. I think they do I think it's different but I think that this is one editors movies that you can remember where you don't even understand. You don't even understand the joke after awhile like I don't even what is the joke in? Can I offer you a FRESCA? Joke now I'm here, PAL? PRESKA. A. It sounds like a thing. You should say to somebody to be kind of a Dick and I, think it's a joke because everything he does is funny in this movie. Yeah. Now, every every line deliver is the highest level comedy when he gets Billy Baru. And he pulls it out. He's like cradle. He's hopefully. It's Saturday, and then you said the best one though L. we're waiting and just like the look on his face, you're on your own. Bigger? Mean that's it's one of the biggest twitter means there is I think I think anytime good. He's something anytime. You're like we got a big you know big scoop coming tomorrow everybody just drops in the well we're waiting. GIF that's that's the go-to. It should be the Go-to of all time. So Ramos Ramos said that everyone had an impact on ever it was living but Ted Knight was a very traditional follow the lines in the script actor. and. Ramos said the whole atmosphere was alien to him. Young people running around and set Florida being crazy crazy. Then Cindy Morgan and played lacy under all said Ted was trying to do his job he sold in the script in sand. Meanwhile. Rodney is running around saying whatever the heck pop and his head was really angry. So. They had this real life Ted Knight Rodney thing. that. Kinda works for the movie because they're not supposed to like each other and you really feel like Ted. Knight hates. Acerbic. Yet, and you get the sense that based on some of the stuff. I've read that Rodney didn't even really know how to be on a movie set Rayo. He just wasn't a professional actor and I don't know I don't know if this story is true or not or if it's apocryphal but that whole bit where Rodney enters the scene and Ramos yells action and he doesn't do anything because he doesn't. Action is supposed to indicate that you're supposed to start acting and you can imagine somebody like Ted Knight, who's been a professional TV actor for forty years at that point is like. What the fuck is happening here like why does anybody know how to be a professional in addition to just doing mounds of cocaine and between every take? I was trying to think who is the two thousand twenty version of Ted Knight. It would have to be somebody who is on. In iconic. TV Sitcom for a long period of time. And represented a different generation I, don't even know who it is because I'm TV matter just more in the seventies three networks. Every show is huge show by as he like it. David Hi, pierce or something like that. You know somebody who is on. Show who is a supporting character but who was always you know winning emmys and beloved. I always thought he was the he was my favorite character on that show. I really I really liked. I liked that he was just really funny. I thought he had good time yet a connection with bearing anyway what's the best of a bunch of stuff here including? Al Cervix, golf bag. It had a phone. Stereo. A quarter keg. A putter with an electronic tracking device and it contraption that enabled other clubs to shoot up in the air at once that's that's just what we know it had more. Can We talk about the Bill Simmons Golf Bag Experience? Are you like a big bag? I do like a little by little bags little. Anyone who ever caddied? knows. You'll never see moo, the giant bag ever and less I'm using a cart. If I'm doing a car, I'll do the bag, but if if it's an actual caddy. It's It's a respect thing. 'cause believe me. There's nothing worse than caddick nothing. Let me Let. Let's talk about that very quickly because I can't I caddied one summer to and. It sucked it's probably had a lot of bad jobs in my life a lot adding worst job you're going to have except for maybe construction I have done construction I have built I have built bathroom partitions in public schools as a summer job and caddying was worse like it was painful hot. The people were dicks to me. That rented every time. It's such an awful job, and if you've got a heavy bag, if you got a bag where the guy was like, it's important that I keep three hundred balls in my bag. You were like God. Damn. This guy he's yes. Selfish. Not Thinking about the caddy. So just wondering if you were a small bagger big. CADDYING Ropes people in when they're young and they don't know any better because it's like. Well, I'll make tips and I get to be outside. It'll be great and it's I guess what? It's not going to be great xactly berated all it's going to be most of the worst I said once I'd like out of the twenty five worst moments in my life I think twenty of them happened when I caddied. The only thing was Tuesdays at the course that I kinda for with Tuesdays when they let the woman play like though in the mornings, it was the only morning where the women were allowed to play Mrs Talking mid eighties. But as they always used to use carts and you were just carry their putters and it was great, that was my favorite day. Catty, I would help them lineup there putts and stuff. But for the most part, it's the fucking worst and succeed is to your cat he's Benicio Year waiters in your caddies absolutely another what's the best the fake names which include Mitch Come. Stein. Lucky under all Dr Bieber out Servic Carl Lip Balm and an underrated chuck. Schick. I don't know what? It is. But it is. What's a? Can we talk about Dr Beeper Real Quick? Sure. Underrated he's got a lot of screen time. In this movie. He actually has a lot of lines in this movie and I. I can't quite put my finger on what the thinking was but this character, it's really weird if he feels like an snl character that they just didn't fully flesh out. So I. I. Up later Mikhail okay. Another would say the best lacy under all. and. Now, I don't know if it was. This is one of the first naked people I've ever seen. So I'm always going to be attached to their for life, but she's she's just great in this movie and. I would say normally I would say it's unclear why this didn't lead to a lot of other stuff for her because i. think she's really good but they in the in the research, we're GONNA find out why didn't lead more because there? There's a really bad old Hollywood story about that. Oh. Another age. She. But she does she is following a very traditional playbook that is similar to what civil shepherded or she was a model and a Canon in commercials in AD campaigns and she gets an opportunity to act in this movie and she wasn't she trained as an actor but she was not like a you know aspiring to be a major actress. So it's she's like a lot of people here like bill newcomer, you never listener before. She's really good. She's good. She's funny. Another what sage the best lacy under house yellow four, fifty s l just great. I would have gone convertible. If I had been on the production, I would have I. think that would have been the final piece for but still great. Great car. Great. Arabs. Recourse this movie in general yeah. The the Llama story I had in what's age the best, but we should also I guess would put her most Rajpal seen I really liked the bush would see t shirts and I remember rating eighteen years ago like how are these not available and now like you can get all stuff from all these movies but I love that I love the Billy Baru I I don't know how Billy Baru got that name. I love the idea of somebody having a special putter that the break out in big situations. Do you now your clubs? Do you have anything like that now? Does does Ben name his guitarist. Now I did name my pool sticks I poke US did have house. Yeah. That's that's that's very Boy Is Ice Royal. History that all the edge I get it. I just loved everything about billy. Brew. NEWNAN MININ A. Nudity, netted. I to me this is the ultimate. What's age the best? That's age to the point that. It became so integrated into our culture. That when you see it in the actual movie now it's surprising. Because this is had a forty year run of people like trying to fuck each other begau nude it. As this a is that a move you pull on the golf course. Are you familiar with Joe House on a golf course but you know if you're playing horse with somebody showing how many times does anyone in any situation works Co. because if someone did that to me on a golf course, I would I would go after them. If someone tried to talk through my Putt, I would I probably hit on the golf course Car Washing his golf balls continues to be hilarious forty years later. This is great. I'm looking at you. You're green tea you could hide. I don't blame you. You're a trip. Oh, that was a good one. ooh, that was right by you wanted, we'll Mrs Crane your monkey woman you know that Monkey willing you lean. Mean you're not too far. So good. Oh Mrs Craig Session he the way he describes what the women are. Obviously Carl is a ridiculous character and it's whatever it's offensive but hit his interest in them is so weird. Is probably a criminal. He's definitely in jail then. Probably. Ted Hours after that movie after blowing. Up The whole golf course. So yeah, probably isn't jail. I have don't worry. It's good luck. Yeah in Haiti. For what age the best because I feel like that led to a nice run of Haiti humor. Kazan snl they did the bad idea jeans and that I don't know there's a legacy for that. L. Hugh, will you come here and Loofah my stretch Bach? fucking kills me plus why was the judges they've L. Hugh, who's L., hugh? Hugh is not name I've ever heard of I duNno. Eliahu smells is some incredible comedy writer name creation should judge L. Hugh snails. Also serve accenture it's in here Kenny loggins. Yeah and we need to talk about Kenny loggins. So I mean that one of the great movie screenwriters ever we talked about him in top gun what Is he the greatest you think? Is. He. Is he over you know Peterson Tara is he over the is he is he over Harold Falter? Meyer. In terms of providing music for eighties movies is he the number one eighties music guy? Well, he doubled duties Topgun. Yeah he he does footloose, which is a sensation. Any has the theme song for this movie that's been going for forty years and counting. So I think that's gotta be bigger than half. Alzheimer let me say that alright the theme from this movie still with us, it's just great to good one love it has. For me if you're on somebody's porch and DYSFUNC- comes on at nobody's I, go what the fuck is this never disappointed when it comes on. My arm it's broken became may run into that. That is a classic with age the best that became a running joke in all kinds of scenarios for all kinds of thanks. What is vote? Is Beeper say when he's like Oh yeah it could be a fractured ONA. peepers tough. Suspicious beeper and then I will more would saves the worst. Just, judge smells this week. His golf course blew up. His ship boat sank. He nearly killed an old lady with this club. He found out his beloved niece was was just up to stuff. Found out ties dad never liked him. He lost and legal eighty thousand dollar match and The last we saw he is being chased by boosted Rocco rough week. Tough Times for the judge not ideal. The lesson there is don't be a massive asshole everybody I think. He's just a complete pray for for an hour and forty minutes and the world responds to it. I had one other tiny would sage the best I still like judge smells golf outfits in this movie, it's shades of of Jack Nicholas late seventies, early eighties like there's a pink shirt plaid pants Combo that I think actually would like Joe Household wear right now. The one thing that's weird I mean there's a lot of style choices in the movie that crazy but it's back when the golf shirt polo shirt would have four buttons and go all the way down to your breastplate. So it Everybody, just looks it's just instantly aged because of that you haven't seen a person wear a shirt like that in twenty five years and if they are wearing, it's because they haven't bought a shirt since nineteen eighty but you know I mean he looks better than Al Servic. Well. One thing that's age the worst is. Really, nobody has hats on. Nafta be everyone's wearing a hat back then everybody. Skin cancer they're smoking. Of cancers going on cocaine. There's more. You know there are more. Like detective hats you know like deer storrow vile hats in there are like baseball caps guys are our caps on the course any other words edge the best are going to spend time talking about the Llama seen like I. I just feel like that's doing. Let's do it. I. I just think that that's the funny I. Think it might be the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life I. I think it's the maybe the funniest scene in movie history is what he's trying to do by colliding goofball shit with high levels, Zen thinking and exploring like history and the wider scope of the world with this moronic criminal character is surprisingly and weirdly sophisticated while also being totally legible to a six year old and it's just it's the it's the genius of Bill Murray in two minutes. So I. Tell Them I'm Appro Jack. Who Do you think they can be. The Dalai Lama himself the son. Lamb. The. Flowing robes grace all. Striking. On a I e, what am I give him the driver heels often wax big. Long. Into a ten thousand foot crevice ready to base. It as glacier. All. Guga. Go. CONGRATS. Finish eighteen. Going to stiff me and I said Hey. Hey I'm a little something you know. The effort you know. And he says, Oh, uh won't. Be any money. When you die? On your deathbed. You will receive total consciousness. So. And I think all of the words and the phrases and I got that going for me, which is nice like all that stuff is just part of what you were describing. It's in the lexicon now that and it won't ever go away I. Mean that scene is never gonNA leave me as long as I live I'll think of it even when I just when I watch golf on television and that's the power of a truly great movie seen. Big hitter the Lima. He's really holding a real pitchfork. And apparently that got the kid in that scene is terrified that he's GonNa get impaled by the pitchfork and you can see him kind of looking down a couple of times like he's getting hit by it. what's age the worst? So. When you watching the golf tournaments and the golf financers try to force the CADDYSHACK. Line. into the tournament that's that's just aged terribly I don't care. Just. Stop. That hasn't aged as badly as denuncia golf swing, and golf outfit. Yet, another golf swing looks like Chris Ryan on a good day. He's got a he's got like. It's kind of more of a rob deer thing. You know he's just got like that. corkscrew body like swinging real hard. But not the way you're supposed to swing off nobody in the movie really swings well, besides Danny in my mind and wearing a black he's wearing a blouse. It looks like everything about it is just completely off and ridiculous and it's hard to believe you see. Danny swing and you see denuncia swinging. You're like really this came down to the eighteenth hole. He looks like he's headed to his shift at Chippendales right after the permits and ridiculous outfit. Terrible another what's age? The worst gopher? Do. I do twenty minutes on this twenty seconds I think we'll probably twenty seconds but I for a long time in my life. If somebody like the Gopher in caddyshack to me, that was all I needed to know. I. It's. It's not funny it. It doesn't really work and they double down on it in the sequel you know they make it like a huge part of the sequel. That's Nick Gopher talk in the sequel. No but. Says words the the gopher gets really horny and starts look looking out for female gophers. It's just kind of a mess I it it doesn't if feels like. You know they had these four styles of comedy that we talked about in the and they tried to add a fifth one. They tried to add like the muppets like gremlins something that was like an animatronic toy into the movie and it it just it's not funny. You. Know I didn't know about the caddyshack to thing. 'cause caddyshack to never happened. Sorry Another Woods Age Maggie. One of the worst sports movie characters in a longtime not sure why she's here. She's Got An Irish accent for reasons that remain? Unclear? The Act Of Cutting. The actors not Irish no several. Animal House. Yeah. So she has this amazing I d be where she's an animal house and then she's in caddyshack and then basically as ad acting after that. But it's a sad story she I think she suffers from. Mental health problems and and she walked away from acting completely after being in these movies mile. This has the. Pregnancy subplot, the quickly resolved pregnancy subplot that we definitely didn't need, and I'm not sure what's in there and just in general tough character. Another would say the worst. The Baby Ruth Bar. As jaws parody. In one thousand, nine, hundred eighty is a lights out idea I think forty years later maybe not as a effective. CADDYSHACK to you mentioned. This is a what's age the worse for me just from somebody's this movie too many times Lou the caddy master, the courses blowing up. There's bombs everywhere. Things are just exploding around everybody as Danny. Noonan's last PUTT is hanging on the lip Lou the caddy master undaunted by bombs going off all over the holes around them. Just staring at Danny Noonan's last PUTT intently kit unfazed unfazed by explosions all over the place. It wouldn't your reaction be like cover your head fall to the ground I. I don't know never really understood that one. Maybe he was a Vietnam veteran, he had been acclimated to the. Main hospital I think also probably is a testament to how much lou hated smells. Really, wanted to see that puck ball I just wanted to crush his spirit. This last one is a bummer. John Peters was the producer. A. Pretty checkered past famous figures commute should we explain who he is a little bit? So former Hairdresser Warren Beatty model shampoo after him. Straight in. Produced a star is born with him feud with Kris Kristofferson became a pretty big producer, and then eventually had books written about him because him and Peter. Guber was an it took over seventy. Yup and It was a disaster but he's the producer of this. So Cindy Morgan agrees to be topless in this movie in the Lacey Danny Seen? John Peters arranges a playboy photographer to come shoot her for a spread for playboy. She declines. Peter says you're doing their Sarma end your career. They have like the classic old Hollywood terrible conversation. Now, she's upset Herald Ramos steps in cancels the shoot. John Peters Zo you'll never work in this town again, all that stuff and she actually doesn't work after that and you know it's it's one of those stories that you hear a lot of these stories last couple years in the METOO era, and this is like an early version of a and it's a fucking bummer. It's it's just a bad story. It's a it's just the classic Hollywood being pressured into doing an actress being pressured into doing something that she doesn't want to do, and then by putting up a fight then being branded somehow as somebody who is not easy. To work with, you know Cindy Morgan did do a couple of things I mean she was she was the one of the stars of Tron which came out a couple of years. Later I did have a career she worked in television quite a bit in the eighties and nineties, but you could make the case that she should have or could have had a much bigger career but I'm GonNa make the case I think she should add a bigger career and yeah, John Peters is really powerful back then so he was dead a that was a bummer story casting what? Did, you know who the other final candidate for Daniela's before make O'Keefe. Got It. I. Sure Do. Can we talk about this? Yeah make me work. Incredible. So that's a different movie. Well, correctly, they decided that he wasn't funny enough. Yeah now yet Mike O'Keefe was hilarious but he could at least be in the vicinity of comedy without it being weird and I think Call, what do you think of Michael Key from the movie? What do you think of Danny I love his golf swing. and. I actually think he's really good in this movie. He's good I I don't think he needs I. Don't think you need anything more from that part than what he does he's onscreen with Chevy chase with Chevy Chase when he's holding like the ORB of power this is as funny as Chevy's ever going to be and Danny can hang with him. You know he's not getting blown off the screen you're interested in Danny his character whereas characters going that opening scene you take drugs. Danny every day good like that is those are some of the most memorable moments in the movie. So I think they did right Mickey rourke though I just WanNa see what it would have been like for Mickey, Rourke to be on a film set with the cocaine machines at that time like that would have been that would have been intense would have been ugly. Danny Noonan also is really good in the scene when judge smells tries to kill him at the golf. Club Yeah and great. It really seems like he's trying to hit a it's really well choreographed. When he knocks post out, you know it's pretty intense and then he ends up in the bathroom. The whole thing it's really Michelle pfeiffer. By beloved Michelle Ever Yeah One of my favorites I'll watch every Michelle pfeiffer movie turned down the role lacy under alka she didn't WanNa get. Naked. Not. Shocking. If she's in this movie and maybe just. You don't have to have the top of sin with her whatever that would imagine that Michelle Pfeiffer was in caddyshack and I think she could have pulled it off. I can't imagine her being as Frisky as. As. lacy was in this movie she's never really played a character like that. But she lets a picture Michelle pfeiffer and Mickey Rourke in bed as Danny and lacey instead of standing. And Michael O'Keefe said differ movie. It's like an Adrian Line erotic thriller. I see that I think part of the reason. Michael kief verses Mickey Rourke. It felt like a stretch for him to get lacy under all which I think is important Mickey Rourke. It would almost seem my keys more competition for Thai Web, strew, woodleigh definitely true. Stephanie True Mickey Work was overqualified in that respect. John. Peters Claims that he had Bo Derek for. Sandra Ramos rejected it before she did ten I guess she was filming ten at the time about to film tenors. Both Erica's lacy under all is just bizarre how old is lease he's supposed to be. Clean she twenty-six. She forty? I, always assumed she was like twenty five. Okay. And Dan. I've. Danny's like eighteen. Let me just say something else about Danny now that I'm thinking about. One of the things that this movie and that generation of National Lampoon guys get credit for, and this is going to sound weird and I don't want this to sound to identity politics but it is a point that's been made over and over again is that these movies Kinda shifted some of the key, the center of American comedy away from that traditional Jewish point of view the Sitcom writers of your show of shows, your sid. Caesar's your woody. Allen's you're all that generation of fifties and sixties comedy writers were largely Jewish and they were obviously hugely successful. And this is like A. Basically, an a catholic. Bunch of people making comedies and Danny's family. Is An Irish Catholic family. It's a house with eight kids in it. Based on the Murray family and it's weird to say like we'd never really seen this before because we definitely seen plenty of Irish Catholic families. But in this version of comedy, it's kind of a new version of blue collar jokes and the idea of seventeen year old danny trying to figure out what to do with his life to others should go to college whether he should get a job. Then, bagging twenty five year old woman from New York City who is beautiful and funny as lacy is the all time like master batori fantasy of every seventeen year old Irish Catholic it I have I ever knew growing up like it's It's a very specific and unique thing that does that seems obvious. Now, we've seen it so often since then because this movie was so it's set the template and a Lotta was kind of era though right for comedies where was always the Guy Kinda out kicking his coverage with whoever the? A hot female was the movie. Yeah. Don rickles was originally considered for Al Servic. Yen You said that he rodney had so much in common back then to that they were both like tonight's show icons but that they weren't really beyond that like didn't really have a mainstream repeat and they were just they were they were club comics. I. I think he's wrong for this movie. is to mean. There's Yes to it that your you would not be rooting for him. You know he's almost better off in the judge smells role That's interesting. And then they really wanted pink floyd to do the music for this movie and Pink Floyd said, no, thank God Ramos is so weird Ramos is trying to work in like Zen Buddhism into the movies trying to Work Pink Floyd into the movie his we talked about this with groundhog day interests as a filmmaker are like just left of center enough that you get stuff that is inexplicable in his movies but ultimately good it's a good thing though that Kenny loggins came through instead of pink floyd. Everybody loves, game shows everybody has a podcast I've got. Everybody I'm Kyle grants in my new show. Ten questions is a game show talk show athletes movie stars everybody will come on not just talk. They come on this show to compete ten questions that whether they know it or not are somehow inspired by a moment in their life or their career ten questions ten points so much fun head over to spotify and please subscribe to ten questions Kyle Brands. Best that Guy k the pants award I still don't know a doctor beepers name is so he probably wins because he's just if I see him his doctor beeper I have no idea what his real name is or what else he's been in his anything else. He's been in a couple of things. So he's the only guy when you look on IMDB who doesn't have a photo next to his name in the whole cast, his name is Dan Resin. He was in the man with one red shoe. You remember that Tom Hanks movie not good. Not Great that should be one of our rules for the that Guy Award. If you don't have picture IMDB baby that should be you you to qualify. Yeah I had as the winner though Denuncia. AK Scott, Colombo because he was also that guy from porkies, he'd have part and pork is in poor gays movie that nobody has talked about fifteen years but was a huge eighties. Nineties re watchable movie eventually fade away but he was basically. The guy from pork as the guy from caddyshack and then that was it. He was never seen again. Yes. So he's he's. His name's. Tony de Nunzio. In caddyshack and his name's Brian Schwartz in Porky's well, he's the one they do. Everyone there's another character and poor. This is an anti Semite and he ends up fighting with that guy the whole movie. Yes. He plays like the Italian American archetype in caddyshack plays the Jewish American archetype in Porky's. Arrange. I'm giving him the word, the Vincent Hanna GimMe Hell. You GotTa Word for overacting obviously has to be Maggie making it up. All right. We'll I'm willing to marry you. Well. Are we sure it's not Rodney. Now It's gotTA. Be Maggie smells now. Spells perfect. We can't it smells. Isn't an insult though I mean I feel like he's going for it. Maggie Dow's it up. Okay what movie magazine End, but it's it's not this one. What about the? Bishop. The case for it. He's literally calling out to God and then he loses his faith in his distraught in the bars you pointed out it's sad it's good rhetoric. Brandy Booth Award for best performance by a pet the gopher zero out of ten. No Choice. Now choose it off for the Gopher. An incredible dion waiters word. So that, we have nominee is none of these people one doctor beeper the Bishop Wang Lu the caddy master. the attendant whose name I don't know we mentioned him earlier one one fucking Ted. Knight's scoff shoes and running the beds on spalding smells the winner for me. In a runaway spalding smells. I every moment he's in this movie fucking kills me he only has a couple of lines. He is just the classic Awful Rich Kid, who is the kid who drinks the half drinks who has the bad pot on a says you don't even know how you are who just sucks in every way and I was so happy to see that person in a movie I happen to have gone to high school with a couple spalding spells said my day and. I just so delighted by him every moment, his of the movie I love. He has the hoi line to write SPA US has when Ted Knight's plant. When we see him playing golf initially, you see spaulding behind him, hacking it up like forest. Parts. Funniest things in the movie, he plays eight minutes and he has twenty points. So so bill sprawling sales is real name is John F.. Barmen Junior I'm. His entire IMDB ready Kayla nineteen in nineteen eighty he appears as spalding smells and caddyshack, and then he has appeared in two films as himself handicapped documentary about bad golf from two, thousand, nine and caddyshack the inside story from two, thousand nine and that is it. I I'M GONNA go a step further became a realtor and lived in Boston. Oh now he's a real estate guy herb became second for spalding yeah. Recasting Couch Dr Beeper? So I'm GonNa Throw Rob Robert Wagner. Wow I feel like Robert Wagner was supposed to be Dr Beeper in like ten ten minutes before they started filming he canceled and they had to grab the do they grabbed. that's that's definitely he check I was just trying to look at what that is in the timeline of his marriage to natalie would just to get data the would. Still alive she hasn't mysteriously died yet. Got It. Got It. Yeah. She has done hard either. I. Say okay. Yeah that's good. I like because now if you're making caddyshack even fifteen years later Dr Beepers Roblo. Present yeah. From like Nineteen ninety-three on he's Raba although I mean God it feels like Rob Lowe could be smells at this point isn't a rob lowe in a way is like he kinda hits on some of that quality that you're talking about who's the actor from Sitcom I. Felt like a new generation of people no rob lowe from parks and rec more than they know him from about last night or something. Like that have fast, Internet research film was inspired by rhetoric Costa Brian Doyle Murray memories working as a caddy in Neka. At the Indian Health Club. His brothers also worked and had Ramos also worked as a caddy So a lot of the caddyshack characters based on people they experience when they caddied film shot for eleven weeks. In Nineteen Seventy Nine filmed in Florida Gov. Carl backer not in early drafts of the script. As you mentioned it was a love triangle with Danny Maggie and denuncia which sounds terrible. Awful. Did you know that Lacey under ause dive they'd stunt doubled it at the last second. It's the stunt double who actually does the dive Somehow. Never caught that over the last forty years Cindy. Morgan. had contacts, and if sticker context that you couldn't see so she can do the dive. So they had a stunt double it. Over under two hundred times you've paused caddyshack during a certainly under all scenes bill. Certainly. Sandra All Saints under. A MAKO KIEF wouldn't play golf. For Twenty five years after the film came out. Oh Yes said like people talking to them on the golf course, right? Yes. said it was too every time he was out. It was just he just couldn't enjoy it. Everybody would be peering watching him judging them on that stuff ca. Can I ask you Michael O'Keefe Question Yeah? Where does he rank in the history of great sports movie actors because? Of the coming later. Great. You know what have coming right now Scott Columbia and Cindy. Morgan. Dated for two years after this movie. So. In real life yeah he went in real life. And then there's a deleted scene on youtube. Where Carl teaches tie webb had a hit a ball with Danny in. That's just fucking weird and is. A classic deleted scenes are deleted for a reason, but if you want to watch another scene. With with Carlton there you go apex. Mountain. Bike O'Keefe. I would say, I, mean it has to be right because he's coming in for the Great Santini and he starring in the funniest movie of the year. By the way, the Great Santini is a really good movie excellent rallies good in in the basketball scene with Robert duvall is the legendary see in the movie, but he's really good in that movie. So you know as I came and Tim Hutton in nineteen eighty were like the two young actors to watch and then all the sudden. Sean Penn and this whole class comes after them that equips them Rodney Dangerfield Apex Mountain. I. Would probably say more like mid eighties and back to school when he became a a draw himself, you know he he was the draw to those movies. So that was my answer as well back to school, which is a hilarious movie gray movie and he has the Rodney dangerfield comedy specials on HBO and he's Breaking Dudes like Sam Kennison. And Bill Maher and people that I'd never seen before until they're in those special. So the Combo that would say, yes. Ted Knight. It's funny. Career? Wise. No. Because Mary Tyler Moore is is apex bound, but I think retroactively, I think this became his legacy because who the hell watches Mary Tyler Morton, obiter forties to watch that this is the kind of the thing that. That outlived him a lot ways. I JUST WANNA say. I love too close for comfort. He's basically judge snails with too hot daughters that movie a and just tried to foil. These guys coming over trying to date Assad daughters and him just being judged bales basically it's great. It was a good show I i. don't God I probably haven't seen it. In. Zan for like two years years I mean I remember that was a Jim J. Bullock show right yeah Monroe. Chevy Chase Apex Mountain I'm going to say now. Did we give it to him for Fletch. I think we'd have yeah Bill Murray. No. No but it's it's pure. It's so pure everything. He does in the movie he shot the movie six days and everything he did as six days Golden. Cindy Morgan. Sad the Yes. I think she I think something better could happen. Cocaine. here's the case. Here's the case for cocaine. Nobody nobody's super famous had died yet nobody people knew is bad but nobody really knew how bad. It led to big spurts of creativity for at least a little while before quickly burned the person's brain and they were never the same but that hasn't happened yet on the caddyshack set it led to the disjointed crazy shit. This movie that would never happen now because you would have to be on drugs to come up with half of the things that happened in this movie. And it's probably all downhill. Right after this for cocaine where people probably within a year leg hey, this stuff's bad. Would we do it? Got To say, I'm not sure upped super comfortable identifying this as the apex of. Of. Something that has killed millions of people. Well That every watchable until I make you uncomfortable. I'm saying, yes, picks bound. Got Better for okay. I think it's downhill from this. I was feeling good about rolling with you through caddyshack for the last hour. I felt like I wasn't getting uncomfortable. We talked about Lacey. There was nothing weird and then you you try to give me to put cocaine on a mountain I. Don't know. Baby Ruth Bars. I would say goonies. Fair. Golf. Golf. So bored of Golf. Let me let me give you other things that happened in nineteen eighty. K.. Jack Nicholson. Jack Nicklaus wins two majors, the US Open end the PGA Okay Tom Watson D-. Beats Him in the British. And the masters is savvy. By. Estero sue everybody considers to be the next Jack Nicklaus. It's like an awesome year of just famous people winning majors and tournaments and at the same time caddyshack is happening. That's the case. Well. It's hard to argue. Greatest. What's jacket? The open? Is that eighty six? Yeah. That's eighty six. The case here is that Golf Centigrade spot. Tiger Woods born at this point I think this might have been. Tiger Woods is born. Was He year? Was He born I? Think this is like Tiger Woods on the Mike. Douglas Show. When did he go on the Sea Woods was on the Mike Douglas show this year then that this is definitely. So was was born in December thirtieth nineteen, seventy five. Okay. So he's on the tiger, but he's A little earlier that. Oh. Yeah. okay I I mean I guess I guess she made better golf here caddyshack Nicholas would in two majors should call. House in Nathan again. A they'll just agree with me Picking. Nets. Why did spalding throw up and Dr Beepers car like what a Dick move who does that just throw in a Bush who leans over a car hood and throws up in a car like what fucking Asshole I got the impression it was uncontrollable the the the urge overwhelmed him and he just needed somewhere to put his head. That was terrible job SOKAIA. Why was lacy under all walk in the entire course for judge smells his first round that we saw she's just stuck in the entourage like the UNIV- anything better to do I have wondered about this for years. It's inexplicable. It's also could there be. A worse hang been walking with smales through a golf course for five hours with him Dr Beeper that sounds like the worst time ever just go to the country club bar and have some Martinez what are you doing? Maybe she was feeling Danny maybe she was immediately into Danny and just wanted to get some time with him to see if he he was as interesting in Saudi was this is the hottest girl that's ever come to their small town. This is like Uma Thurman and beautiful girl showing up like she needs to follow around a seventeen year old caddy I'm saying no weird Platt very weird. caddy day at the pool this as somebody who's a former caddie like this would never happen. They have caddied days where the cat is complained the chorus for four hours but. Using the pool and having the Kaddish show up like that is just never ever happening. couple other pool things. Wise Diving Board. So high at this pool. It's it's basically like an Olympic diving board it at this weird at Bushwick country club why it's ten feet high why? Cancer that's struck me before you have. Are you scared of tall diving boards? I have never slept. If you went to country club. Which I would assume kids would be used in the pool would be a good idea to have a diving board. That's ten feet high and said, no. Right, now I have never been to a country club. So I don't know out there you go lacy under all shows up she's wearing a bathing suit in and black high heels. Why the that's a huge flex. I Dunno she's just trying to she showing off she's drawn attention. Another picking it. Was Judge smells his boat so small. Such a shitty boat hit a boat Kirsten party for this boat was like eight by three. Well. I mean he was a judge he wasn't a real estate tycoon maybe it's all he could afford you both shaming smells. The boat was eight feet. Who has? A It's a hey I could fit to people have this boat. Let's go for ride hold on. We got to have a boat ceremony at the over here. So you're saying when I unveil my eight foot boat, you're you don't want to be invited to the the boats I definitely don't want to be invited the judge he couldn't afford a twenty foot boat. I don't know what he's got bill his swing and data is swinging Dick at Bush would. Visit Nice neighborhood. You know you reminded me of something though, and this is from watching the movie. So many times Bush would the course looks like a piece of Shit. What's up at the grass on that course agree had for ticket needs they. Are Awful. They're so bumpy. Every ten is like bouncing like there was an earthquake. Lacy. Went from Thai web to Danny Noonan in about twelve hours. It was it was the you know late Seventies. Would he do this? She was living freely. I respected my wife watched it with me this weekend and when when lace made the leap by Wife Dominion said Hooker. I I respect her decisions and I'm proud of lacy. Terrible. Why would the judge in a million years allow Danny to replace out? SERVIC. During the big forty thousand our match. Who would ever do this tie kinda grabs the conscious there and says, we get to choose the substitute according to whatever made up rules they had gone, and also loo is basically the referee of that round. So it was not in smells his favor. I think judge. Would have. He should've known like this is bad for us. Now are playing the guy who just won the cat. Tournament. Anti who's better than me? Who Shot a sixty eight a couple of days ago like an eye at forty thousand dollars in the line. This is not ideal. You're right. It's it's a boneheaded move by the judge you think you might jurist promise. nother picket ty Webb, who we've established is this unbelievable offer. He can hit stuff blindfolded shot a sixty eight. It's just amazing completely gags in the in the big match. FUCKING GAG job. It looked like he was James Harden in the Western finals. What happened to that guy? I was GONNA one of my questions for you is going to be a reassure tie web is good. he he really he he spit the bit there. It's impregnated line a seventeen year old. James Harden. All right. This is the big one more nitpick a baby ruth bars don't float in real life. If you drop a baby with bar in a pool, just drops the bottom at what point does the chocolate start melting off of the candy bar. That's the we get hard right Oh. Maybe maybe it's a water I. think it would like solidify. All right. Here's the big nitpick. I covered this in common years ago. So. And this is people are confused by this right the matches all even in the eighteenth hole the big match for two thousand dollars. So the question is, why did the judge agree to dubber nothing? Here's a setup. Dr Beeper he misses his par. Tie Web Chokes Disease James Harden. The judge pulls out. Billy. Baru. Makes Birdie. Sanad Danny needs to make the. PUTT. To have the whole and salvage a tie. For the match misses it they lose the match. So Al Servic says Judge Males dubber nothing he makes it judge accepts. At that point, the judge can't lose money. Until he takes that bet because if Danny has the whole, it's just a it's just a wash nobody wins anything. But now potentially loses eighty thousand dollars if Dante makes thirty thousand dollars view. So basically he sacrifices. In one scenario either when forty thousand dollars or nothing. In the other scenario either win eighty thousand right lose eighty thousand terrible job by the judge. What are you doing? I. Think if we've learned anything from this podcast, it's the despite your admiration for Ted Knight Judge Smells is trash. He's just He is a moron. He doesn't know what size boat to buy. He doesn't know how to gamble on a golf course. You know he doesn't know how to keep the bishop interested in his goings on he says, he's a failure. Is His. Name is just running around the the On the flip side incredibly savvy moved Servic. EITHER GONNA lose forty grand or break even. He risks an extra forty grand to win eighty grand. He basically gets two to one odds on the Danny Noonan Putt. Which judge has realized because he's a schmuck and Al Servic flips around and that's why you know he's owns the property in China on the good side like he knows his shit. You know I in twenty twenty though. L. Service would not be the hero of a movie. You know real estate tycoon who's not a giant high-rise next to a golf courses not. Here that should better what's age wears. Best quote we named basically of them. I do enjoy Moose Rocco, the judge, his checkbook, but we covered all the rest of. Could this be remade as ten episode Netflix? Show fuck off. unanswerable questions. Who Do you think carried more bags or I'm sorry who do you think carried more clubs in their bag judge smells or out Servic? And we know. We know for a fact, both of them had to putters in their bags you're only allowed fifteen max. I think both of them were over the limit basically. To great question I would say a smells because smells strikes me as the kind of guy who thinks it's really important to have. Of A four Iron Anna Five. Iron Ns. Anna four would. Would and a seven limited nine would yes and that's those guys are the worst you gotta know what to take out of your bag that's a big part golf. Make sure you don't hit too many clubs. You don't how to hit and smell. We know you know he's mediocre so I'm I'm going smells despite the size of service bag. Great. Sports movie be put ever. Well. Happy Gil- Happy Gilmore. To finally win the title. Or Danny. Newnan, winning the caddy tournament as everyone around him is screaming Newton Newnan and yelling at him and tried to distract him and he still drains like a twenty footer. Una Green. That is so bumpy because Carl Idiot Gardner Guy. Can't like doesn't know how to fix one green. I think that was incredible. I'm very partial to the the whole final whole sequence on Tin Cup though including the pot at the end. Okay. That's that's a personal favorite of mine. Do you think this movie created the word Poontang. I have no, idea. You tell me. Can make a case that did I thought about Apex Poontang but I get uncomfortable. Appreciate you sparing me that one. Rodney dangerfield what the fuck happened how do we? How do I explain this to my kids? He does caddyshack and back to school which are two icons. And then he made ladybugs. Not a lady has not aged well, but let me tell you something I have seen ladybugs a lot for my generation ladybugs was in the HBO Rotation Hall. Of Fame it was on every Goddamn Day and every kid my age was completely head over heels in love with Vanessa. Shaw from interesting. Yeah. She was the Cindy Morgan of my generation in a Lotta ways. Love. Dreaded digital. He was in. A couple of other him he was really really famous. He had. There's an animated movie called Rover. Dangerfield. That was you know him like he was a big deal in the eighties he was ever present. They're answerable question. Is this a better movie? If in the first scene, the gophers in Maggie's car, and then Carl, Gardner, just blows both of them up better movie or worst movie. Can't support blowing Maggie up. That's just not. The movie. He says uncalled-for she's a casualty she he's trying to kill the Gopher and magazine an unexpected. Maybe she goes to the hospital every. Couple months. I guess I accidentally thought that the bishop had been murdered by the lightning. So I guess maybe if it was a similar situation comes back later she's got her yes, laying she's fine. You mentioned earlier. where. Does make Oh kief rank among the great actor? Athletes Lesha. Great swing like really looks like he could have just gone to the tour I. I'm personally offended he wasn't intent. Cup. Yeah, you could have been good. Well, I mean Tin Cup is perfectly cast Costner and. Or Him and he should have been in all golf movies from that point but but you owe keeps run is iconic. So Great Santini mentioned the basketball scene very memorable sports scene caddyshack. Then he's in Split Image Eighty two where he plays in I think he's a gymnast in that movie and then a few years later he's in the slugger's wife as a baseball player that's six years he's that some of the best work ever. And in classic Atlanta's sports fashion that movie bombed. Wow tough pages I threw that in there just safer. Remember Brown was listening So, do they still sell baby ruth bars? I have this as an Ishmael question even though I could probably look at this on Amazon did the company go under after the duty seen? Did the duty seen ruined the baby Ruth Bar? Who Factors Babe Ruth is a nestle I don't even know. I thought it was Nestle. Yeah. But it says this pre was nestle for a time. Yeah. Baby Ruth was in what Mukalla thousand. Bars back then that just kind of faded away and I don't know what happened a lot of them. Can I share something personal with you bill yeah not. Not. A Fan of chocolate especially candy bars. It's just not my thing. More of a Sour Candy Kinda Guy. Maybe, you'll have an answer for this one. How do we never have a caddyshack video game? What happened? Where did we go? Wrong? Why wasn't? Golden. T caddyshack. Why wasn't region toward ninety three caddyshack why wasn't there an arcade game? Why was there a pinball game? Wait? How did we miss the boat on all caddyshack video game stuff? Bill maybe it's time maybe it's time for us to develop at forty years. Later, you can play as Newnan you can play as nuncio you can play a snail's you can play his Servic Slot options here today web with their player scores. Can you get an oil card to play as Lou? You know? There's a lot of options here. It's terrible. I don't know what they're thinking All right. Who on the movie. So I have thought about this a lot. And I'm saying Bill Murray. because. A personal choice I don't even know if it's objectively defensible. But what he gives me in the movie, the performance and what we take away from it and how it influenced culture is my pick. But I think that there's a strong case for several other people. Who Do you think? I think Ted Knight when the movie. Wow I think Bill Nour. Bill. Bill. Murray wins the most out of the movie. Okay. So. In a weird way, I don't really know what the answer is but I think unequivocally Ted Knight winsome movie because he has the hardest part. Everyone else dangerfield's just being dangerfield Chevy Chase being Chevy. Chase Bill Murray playing the same guy or the verb like he played that guy insider live like they're just playing. They brought their one character, the table that they knew how to do. Ted Knight if that CARE if Ted Knight's character doesn't work and if he's not really funny, the whole movie falls apart. Esp Villain. He has to make me laugh. He has to kind of not one hundred percent being on the joke which I don't feel like he is like Kinda you've had these movies sometimes where there's comedies in the actors don't really totally understand why they're funny in the movie and I feel like that might be the case with him and the seats deaf who else would have played him. And that character just has to work, and as I watched the movie as we get older and older, he's still the one that it makes me laugh the most All that stuff like, but I think for who the movie did the most for I think the answers Bill Murray because I mean, they led to the pebble beach stuff and I think he's gotten forty years of mileage out of this movie. I don't think you could say that about anybody else. Yeah. You know I thought about with re-casting couch I never would I never would recast headaches I know how you feel about him but I do feel like somebody like Harvey? Korman have done this you know somebody who is able to do that kind of haughty over the top thing but. And it just becomes Sillier if it's the wrong actor, it feels lesser like if it's Mr Roper from three's company, the Great Norman Fell Norman fell. Yeah. One of that one of the greats even ham it's like it doesn't feel quite big enough. It's really hard to thread that needle I think at this movie comes along. Fifteen years later Ted. Danson's probably judge smells. But even then it's like Ted Danson was famous. You know and I I. Just I. think it's so hard to cast that one part. It's incredible that we don't have crissier to do his Pacino as as smells performance. You know it's really sad r.i.p? Well, we're waiting you know well. I think the case for Ramos to I mean this is Ramos is first directing directed movie and he goes on to direct five six total classics and Chevy also like Thai web is iconic. Danny. Nunez Chevy Chevy forfeits when he comes back for caddyshack to which was indefensible decision by him. It's not great. There are things I like about two. Sorry I know you I know you hate it I. There are some things I like about it. It's just it's. Trying to hurt me now. Jackie Mason who replaces Rodney? That's really weird. I like that you you down may for the cocaine being on Apex Mountain. And yet, you said you like caddyshack to like the meanest thing I think anyone's ever said there are things about it. I like Jackie Mason is just. Over, he's so terrible he so so awful. Story recently somebody wrote a story about caddyshack too I. Read It on a rack can't remember I read it maybe a month ago at talked about why that movie was such a giant failure and apparently dangerfield. was they really wanted to be in it and he just they couldn't agree to a contract with them. They had already agreed to give Chevy a crazy amount of money to be in like five minutes of it, and it just kind of fell apart from there but it's really bad. There's great Robert Stack. In caddyshack to stack going forward post airplane but you're you're right it's not good. I'M NOT GONNA. DEFEND IT I can't I can't defend it. This was a fun time with comedies were they took people who? Nobody had seen in a comedy like Ted David, Benham Mary. Tyler Moore so was it surprising but there were like the Robert Stack Leslie Nielsen was another one Leslie Nielsen? You know the detective or the bad guy in the seventies things to see him in the naked gun the TV series was unusual All right. So I say Ted Knight. We you know we don't really do this but I would almost WANNA see a poll on this. We have to have the re watchable twitter feed as much as I hate twitter watchable twitter feed out who who won the movie between Ted Knight Bill Murray Rodney? Dangerfield. Chevy. Chase. Harold, Ramos. Yeah. Gosh it's a tough one. Can you even do five people in twitter? Chase because I don't think anyone thinks chevy chase worn caddyshack. Nobody has like. So many of the best lines from the movie you know it's Gosh. I. Don't know don't sell yourself short judge your tremendous slouch. I mean come on my dad never liked you. Tie Web is like conic Do that. Maybe we'll put the four will put. We'll put night, dangerfield chase and Murray. Who won the movie I I just date bill a flute without holes is not a flu. A donut without a whole is a Danish. Don't forget that that's Basho the Japanese poet. Where's where's Craig Craig Stop Get out her for Second We're glad you like caddyshack. Yeah. Why I'm not now Craig Craig who who, when the movie you don't have to go to college. This isn't Russia is this Russia? This isn't Russia Craig. Everyday. So I wanted to think about it before you guys answer that wanted to come up with my own opinion and I just head what wow brown. Yeah. Craig Brown nosing swear to God I would've said whoever I thought it was I just think when I think back on the movie I think about well, we're waiting and I just think about him whether anybody else. Well, that's an fluence. I we're going to put that re-watch ables. poll up on the Rewatch ables twitter feed, which he shall find three go. This was fun caddyshack Craig. We finally did when you liked well, yes did not like it but I did. Well coming up Wednesday movie craig defiantly didn't like pump up the volume I've never seen it. I can assure you lizl. But. There's a specific reason we're doing pump up the volume. It is a definitely a one for us. It's thirty anniversary, but there's specific reason. So tune in Wednesday to find out why we chose that one shot fantasy a pleasure as always craig, we can hear you on the fantasy football podcast. Going people mad at you about your fantasy picks like every day now. No the season for that when things don't out see. Okay. Don't trust Craig. Any time you try to rep for a Pittsburgh steeler. That's something. I've learned not to be trusted on his steeler takes inch connor. Good pick issue. All right. Thanks for this. Let's see. I. It's A.

Bill Murray Chevy Ted Knight golf cocaine Rodney Dangerfield Danny Noonan Herald Ramos Carl Doug Kenney Eddie Shack Animal House Bill Simmons L. Hugh Chris US Chevy Chase Hawaii
Your 3 Phone Sales Secrets

The Sales Energizer

19:21 min | 2 months ago

Your 3 Phone Sales Secrets

"You don't need a five hour energy all you need is the sales energizer the team. Damn Jordan your daily dose of Reality Your daily dose of the deed. But I. Think the news I don't watch the news on believe the sales energizer Dan. Chew this. Don't worry how to sell baby. Worry about why people buy, and it's fun. You got one life for crying out. Loud your fight as well. Just give it all you. Just when I think it's not going to be as fun as the one before each one gets successful. Successfully successfully, better success. What's the word I'm looking for? What's IT GONNA take to get you into this today. and. These wealth. The sales energizer Dan Short. Well Welcome Ladies and gentlemen. We are here in studio. A of the newly renovated deeds cast a headquarters here in beautiful Atlanta Georgia and I have a special guest and a special gift for each everyone. This is a special deed cast. It's is really A. There's two for two reasons one. Mr Christone is with us today live, aren't they all? They're all special, but secondly I actually have a plan for this one. Because this usually here at the the deeds cast. What we do is not only help sales people throughout the globe with inspirational motivational ideas for their daily lives in sales to become better. Usually, that's just free wheeling out of my brain. But today I think my listeners. You Christiane for taking the chance of coming out live with me to do this. I think you deserve something special, and what that is is an actual plan incidents and help that I can give you today so if you're driving your car right now, pullover, I'm you might as well absorb it all or save this for later? Take notes you know. This is like a real live seminar that were doing non-life. We're doing that for them right because I would feel guilty and. You Talk to the people. They were absorbing all this great sales wisdom from you Dan and they were. They get in a car wreck because they're just so excited about it. I mean just a mere accident. Is is worth it to get to absorb the amount of wisdom. That's about to come to you right now. That's my listen live and about taking chances. You know you can't sit home in your house and expect things to just come to. You know you gotta go out there and take chances and if that means if that means that you have to. Go Out and get into. Get into a car wreck. You know for me, it's worth. That's how politically correct I I think. Some listeners of the sales energizer podcasts are that dedicated. They would get in a car wreck for you. I think I. Think it's true. You know it's by the way it really is inspiring I wanNA. Thank you all I. Do get emails and I do get letters back from people who have listened to the the casting. They'll actually tell me about things that have helped probably the best actually just today do all heard. Regular listeners have heard about seven magic words. I wonder if you could help me and just today I. had somebody come to the office at a global headquarters there at lager in midtown Atlanta or I guess it's I. Don't know what that is anymore. But on the sixteenth floor, and came to talk to me about some things and the first thing he said was man I. Wonder if you can help me I, changed my life just using those seven words. You know so seven words before a call before you introduce yourself before you ask for you know where the cucumbers hey i. wonder if you can help me. And that works in a supermarket where the cucumbers and a hardware store you go nowhere, but it just brings people towards you. And so if that's all you got that, that's good, but he's Real I. DO appreciate all the unnecessary act I say. They're unnecessary accolades, but I really need them. They really are pretty nice. You've heard of the. We've talked about this about the five love languages. Yes, by the way sales, people. That is your book. You need to get that book. The five love languages I don't know who made it I. Don't know, but it's like the seminal book. It tells personalities it'll work in your in your marriage, but it'll work in your career to and your life in general to it's just it's just find out what makes you tick, and then you could find out what makes your prospects or customers or spouse ticks, but for my wife What I need to do is take out the garbage. Before she asks yes. That's like saying I love you right? That's a big thing for my wife as well do something and don't make me ask you to do. It is a huge thing, yes, because. The way she explained it to me. I know ALMANAC but I don't want you to think I'm a nag you know it's I. Don't want and so if you would just do it without me, telling. Do something with kids, so that's that's sort of mine I need verbal accolades and praise all the I just. You just tell me how great I am I'll give you anything you want. That's now I know it sound conceited, but it's because I because it might be conceited. I don't know what it is, but the point is I'm honest enough to express that right? And, so you know you tell me that something's good. You're already get a discount. You know when people call me. You only get this coty. You think I got to be Mr Producer Guy I showered you with all kinds of compliments and told you how big of a star you were going to be yet. I had to deliver. They couldn't after however many Ma that's how you get in the door. I'm a sucker for that. So if if that's all you got so far from this deeds cast, that would have been worth it but I have something special, because it's very important right now. A lot of people are doing a lot of business over the phone. And so I figured I'm GonNa, give you my top three. Things of what you need to do on the phone to be successful. This is my my Gig were starting a new coal calling podcast. It's not up available yet, but it will be, and you'll get over there, but I've been given a lot of thought. To how to do business over the phone and I came up with top three, so write them down and get ready to rock and roll, but use them what you want bursting. Is this when you're on the phone talking to somebody else? Giving a presentation, you'll know when the time is right when you get into. Sales Mode or presentation motor demonstration bowed, stand up. And the reason why you stand up is that it's an easy advantage. I want you to think of this. Let's say you were on a actual. Interview. Let's say you're on an interview and you're sitting there in a chair and then the person who's interviewing you. Stands up. Just, think of how you feel right now. It's a little intimidating. Yeah, yeah, that other person has an advantage over you right now. That person feels powerful, but you can see them right now. Yes, but you could see them. But but they automatic just by standing up. They feel powerful. What about you? So here, you are on the phone. and. You're about to give a demonstration you gotTA. Be Presentation. And your equal with them right now because you know, they're sitting down. Hell. Just stand up. Just stand up just that act your physiology that just changed by us. Standing up gives you that extra bit of confidence. Knowing that you have an advantage right now. Your voice sounds different. Your expressions will be different. Your presentation will be better. Sit Down Krista. Otherwise I'm going to have to stand up. But I wanted I wanted to feel better. Yeah! That was great. That's what you need to do. All right, so that's number one. These are easy advantages that you can have just because of this new thing about people working on the phone by the way, if it's on a zoom call, or it's on a call that a video conference or something like that, thank. You could set up your computer. Just put it up on blocks whatever you got there. Put It on your laundry i. don't care but just get into a position that you're standing up. Secondly and actually this may should have been I I should have put an order, but if I had a real producer that would put these things in order for me. I wouldn't have to do. Producer slash. Co host today. That's right. Forever Co host. By the way, Christone is really the world's best podcast producer. If you're thinking about getting a podcast, book may up. Give me some praise and I might be able to get you discount. All right, so make sure when you're on the phone. A lot of people have good equipment. A lot of people love lousy equipment, and a lot of people have good equipment, but maybe a bad network for whatever reason. Are Nothing more frustrating. Than a bad connection. And the worst part is if you don't know it. Until the end. So. It's very important at the beginning when you start talking with them when you start getting into presentation mode. Go ahead and ask them. Can you hear me okay? You can soften it up a little bit by say. Hey, listen with all the thing that's going right now. There's a lot of people on the network and a lot of times it breaks up I just WANNA. Make sure. Can you hear me clearly right now because I know how frustrating that could make. And you go ahead and give them the ability to say yes, things are good. You just got your first. Yes. And you're painfully honest with an I, you know I feel as the luckiest man in the world for two reasons one. I was brought up by mother and father love. And I. Just think it's just a great blessing, but secondly I found. The, perfect woman. I mean I could not I. I really believe there's no other woman that is good for me as this one that I found charge. We have a bad connection over the phone. I'm like to most. I get angry. At the perfect woman I mean. Someone that I would give my life for I'm like I can't talk to you right now. Go to a better place or just. Let's just not too, and we get into fights because with the perfect woman. If you're giving a presentation and there's like a little hiccup. Believe me they hate you. That's all they hear. That's that's all I hear. That's all there talk about your now. You're unprofessional. You've think of the advantage if they keep breaking up and they keep having to apologize to you, so I've got a question. You talked about asking the question, and if they say yes, you have your first. Yes. What if there's two scenarios for? No, they were to say no. You're breaking up because they don't WanNa talk to you. It actually is a good thing because they don't WanNa. Talk to you right and so so you can move on to the next person exactly what if there really is a bad connection where to someone go from there? You would have to fix it. You would have to fix an I. would fix it. You know what Mr Jones I really appreciate. The opportunity given this presentation, but there nothing more frustrating than having to deal with bad connection. Let me see if I can fix something around here if we can great if we can't will reschedule for another time. How's that sound? That sound at the end. That's my trial close. You're always doing as that sound fair enough that makes sense we on the same page. Will that work whatever it is you WANNA get there. It's just real sales-trading. Got This told you to pull over. All Right I. Mean you deserve at these time? Okay, and then lastly, and this is a big daddy right here and this is a challenge that I've seen mainly with young sales. People yeah, mainly with young sales people, but you know here's the thing. Most salespeople are yeah. Most people out there in the trash in the trenches are young. People like to graduate management personally. I would never graduate management because I need. Don't that's my? That's my Shtick, but most people aren't like that I got the most people are young, and so I see this in in lots of training thing. They learn a lot of the the tactics and plans and verbiage and everything, and they come off as being very professional. Professional. Don't sell any more. Be Personal. Not Professional. Personal and professional by professional. I mean beyond time by professional. I mean stand up by professional I. Mean Know who you're talking to know your craft. But don't be robotic. Much better to be person, give you an example. Just today it, Hey! I got a a lead of through some email. Campaigns and elite came in to someone who is. Tell me about your services. It's probably not a good fit type of email response. You know they're all protecting himself. And so. I called the guy on the phone. And we talked, and the first thing I said to him was in regards to this, can you? Can you hear me right here because I'm having trouble with my thing. And then he went on for ten minutes telling me. About his experiences. Working from home now and not getting to see people. And I said I told him a mildly embarrassing story about myself about something that happened when you're not quite dressed. Right and then you thought that the camera wasn't on, and it was on and all that stuff, and just that talk we so we commiserated about little pains that we had. When we got into the sales presentation, it was like he was my body, or just a guy and I I very casually said. Hey Listen! Why don't we do this? I'll tell you a little bit about what we do, and then if it's a good fit, maybe we can move on. We're GONNA. have an appointment or something like that. Is that sound good? And he said yes. I said I just need to ask you a few questions. That could that. Yes, and now we're off to the races and just wasn't a sales call. I was literally finding out whether or not. You know we could work together by the way the budget question did come up, but I didn't ask it very robotically like you, so tell me. Do you have a budget for something like this? In Oh well, it's all part of the like entrust heart of A. New told a story very similar to that in house like four or five podcasts to go where you went out, and the guy had gotten up at like two o'clock in the morning to me to talk about his business, and talking to you about his life, and how he regretted his time, and wished he had spent more time with his with his kids, 'cause he was such a hard worker and Hustler all that personal stuff. He he would only have share that with you. In this person, today would have only share that with with you not until your trusted. Are they going to be able to share that? You're absolutely right, and then you get all the Jews. Then you get all the good stuff the towards the end when I said. You know for for this service. It would be about three grand a month. Probably about six months. Is that something you guys can afford right now. And he said to be honest with you. We have so much in our budget now because we're supposed to be doing conventions, we can't go out to do conventions, and that's what we're budget for, so we you know we have this money in almost like we gotta spend it somewhere boom. And you wouldn't get that. He wouldn't be that comfortable. Enough with the professional. You can't out professional somebody you can't wear. A nicer suit in somebody else anymore, you can't. You can't do all that. Everything's there people see everything. The TV's on everybody is so perfect. But you can't be personal. It's like it's like I say in this world with the world of commodities. And your product is a commodity. The most important part of the sale is the salesperson. Be Personal Not Professional. What did you think of that Christianity? Awesome that how can you give away the stuff for free? That's how it goes all it. Because eventually you're GONNA. Pay In the end believing. They'RE GONNA get. You know that's how it is. I think you can say stuff like that now. Because your listeners trust. Yeah, I heard I heard Rodney Dangerfield by the way brilliant Rodney Dangerfield and you know he was always talks about a was so ugly when he was born who he goes he goes to the doctor came in and you. They slap you. He goes away and then the nurse came in and gave me a few digs also. So eventually. Let's dear listeners I'm going to get you. What you need to do is an email. Tell me what you do. What I need you do is leave a comment. Or a review about the podcast. Give me five stars and then leave a review. Send me an email about your company. I'll talk about you. Talk about the rich heart global over here air. We go out. Rich Richard Goal was unbelievable place. You know you're looking for a place for seminars and things like that and everybody's so worried about social this. They've created the perfect multi environment for you to do that incredible. It's a hybrid deal where you can have people where they're comfortable. Social distancing in an event space, but also virtual and live in addition to that rich global. It really is kind of one stop shop for a lot of business. I mean. It's cool if you want. Want to zoom call. Twenty people want to be in zoom call. Great in twenty people want to come to the event. Great and everybody gets to mix it up. 'cause you gotta get back into the real world and so and you might see the DJ might see walking in the halls. Always an added benefit ballistic I. Really Appreciate Your listening to this entire podcast. You're a special group of people out there. All over the world. Listening to Dj cast just think there's probably seven and a half billion people who didn't listen to the And that makes us special or doing listen. You're the best on the go. Today? Hey, guys, Standard and the deeds people call me the sales energizer. The reason is almost speaker McCullough. Honor. The most of all I do and what I'd love to do is come to your business to do a kickoff sales training meeting your sales. People will love the love your company even more. You'll love it because they'll be more production and the top all you get to meet the deed to go ahead. Dan, an DOT com, and contact us for speaking ideas. We'll rock and roll. And remember to subscribe to my Youtube Channel. Follow me on Facebook, twitter Instagram, and whatever else you can think about. We'll see next time. Go get him to. Suck pseudo don't what to do, call. Nine, one, zero, nine nine. Call. Eight nine one nine.

Dan Short TA Atlanta Mr Christone Mr Producer Guy I producer Rodney Dangerfield Christiane WanNa Georgia sales training Facebook Youtube Ma Co Mr Jones Richard Goal ten minutes six months five hour
Rodney

See What Happens

47:18 min | 8 months ago

Rodney

"And and we are back with Jamie Black. That's what I wish my name was. Did you really see what happens. I'm Rob Schneider of course and the podcast and see what happens. I'm here with my Buddy Jamie. We're about to go do a GIG. He was just saying what do you what do you wish to change your name. Yeah because I listen to Jamie. Fox's autobiography biography. Yeah his name is not. I wish I would have changed my name to to be on his. Name's actually Jamie Leopard. As he changed it to not notice but he changed Jamie Foxx sound like a woman and when he would sign up on the comedy club sheets. There weren't many women going up so they would get oh priority. Oh and that helped him with so I had always thought about changing my name. Yeah and also did Yo-. Yeah you do both and your future. It's a Shitty last. It's hard to everyone. I Know Schneider. Ryder isn't exactly like show-bizzy. But you know like Lenny Bruce's real names Leonard. Alfred Schneider the legendary Comedian Lenny. Bruce but there was. I was just this comedian. There's a magician. I went to school with who graduated few years before me. You know like when he graduated like four years before he's like three years before I was like a long time. Yeah Oh yeah a murder. He's a magician changes name to mark harden and I thought like Isn't this James This is name like Jim Videos or something you know and and I think he made the and I thought that was so phony but now I realize that's a good idea. Tom Cruise is going to get more attention for like You know who's that guy named Tom. Cruise as opposed to like Tom. Schwartz do you think there's another name Bernie Schwartz. It was a guy. Tony Curtis I mean if he would get Bernie Schwartz. Who knows what happened he would have never been Tony? Curtis now why did Mark Hardin. And if he was he had the pool to choose from any words any names what made him pictures of regulating. It was hard I mean Dini. He went for it. Yeah I think so hers Angel. Yeah I mean that's that's not real name right I don't think so. What is Chris? Angel's real name to great great question. Yeah Google it maybe Montes best joke a lot of people. Just call him con artist. Yeah 'cause making good good Monday though I liked it hovers whatever that trick is oh yeah it's on the Internet you can look it up. I'm looking up Chris. Angel's real name. Okay Eh buzzing her thing what is it. Christopher Nicholas Seren tacos really seren earn tacos. Yeah that's a horrible name. It says here. He began using the stage name Chris Angel when he heard about his real name. Okay celona sense. How much are you willing to change your life for show business? That's what really comes out to like you know I don't know I mean I really do you think like if I were to change by name but that would have been better. Would you have gone with it. Did it ever occur to you to do that. Bernie Schwartz you'll Bernie shorts this okay. I don't know what I'd do. Rodney Dangerfield he's he that guy. Jack Roy I mean tell you made huge difference changes name. He was already like you know. Comedian back then and then like I don't know I forget the story but it's a good one and it's really good. That especially telling stories on podcasts. That I don't know the story. It is something that he changed it before it was like a carson or something right because he wanted it to be well somebody said mission. Change Your name and Blah Blah Blah and that was back in the fifties or so I think it was like in he open. We're putting on Carson with something like. Hey you're going to get a fake name get a fake name. If you'RE GONNA make up a name make up a name and it was great because Rodney You can really He's one of those guys that like. I mean I was one of the honors of my life to be the Paul Bear. One of the pallbearers. At his yeah. He's took a shine kind to me when I was a young comedian. He's one of my Fa- I never knew this. He said he came up to me in the eighties at Hurricane. Really funny very original. Hey you WANNA hang out. I got some girls I got some wall. Let's hang out. I don't know one hundred percents Irvy's at blow but I'm pretty sure he did and Anyway Guy's a legend. Where did you first meet him? I met him a comedy club and it was he jacker Rodney. No no no. He was riding in the fifties. I'm not that old. You fugger anyway. No but yeah and it was just like the legends hanging out with like well seeing Rodney. He's performing La back back in the eighties. sweatpants he literally just go up. In sweats. You know look like you know like you literally just got out of bed and then I did. I did some animated thing and and I did it because he was doing it. And then I did it He did it because I was doing it. That's what he told me what side anyway. But he was like an hour late and then the limo arrives because they sent a limo those house he gets out little wearing a robe every time. You saw Rodney you saw is Dick I matter we once saw robotic really. I've met him one time as backstage vegas every time anyone ever saw that you saw dick and anyway so he comes out of the US. I go does Rodney out there. And he's like he's he's an hour late Minnesota. I didn't care I was just happy to see him right anyway so I go out. Ah He's not getting out of the LIMO. He's just in there. It's like it pulled up and then it's like okay here okay. He's here he's he's yeah he's out he's out there and so I go out there and I go. I opened up the door he goes. Hey Rob how you doing. Hey Pal it's always a hurry pile and good man. He said And he didn't make any effort to get out of the LIMO. I said Hey man. I'm glad you're doing this. Hey as are you going to get out. You're GONNA come in. And he said yeah why not. So he comes comes in and it wasn't like it was some I forget what animated it wasn't like a top flight one you know and And we weren't doing pixar everything you know some forgettable thing and so he comes into the booth and start doing this you no and we're opposite we're doing it you know at least in the same room doing this thing and if some he's playing a rat or something you know you know like an playing a rat you know as one waist fucking stupid things and the director starts taking this way too seriously the director this woman comes in and says Rodney we like you to sing it oh by what we know saying the part saying it and he just looks at me so it's down to this a singing rat fifty years of show business now this is the low and I just think Oh my God Rodney Anyway so he said I'm not doing that I came in here you know twenty five thousand bucks get in get out that's what I'm here you want me to get out knows it good for him no yeah anyway he was funny you know I went and saw him out in Vegas and the Ed Hey I got a lot of jokes great there I got a lot of jokes I remember two hundred jokes how many guys that come on now hey I I miss him. I love that movie. I don't know why the guys he calls me once in a while your buddy. Oh Yeah Harry Basil. That's right but then I email I text them. Go like what's going on with with that movie. And then India never hear from them but I I really WanNa make that move because I think Rodney's his stories ridiculously great story and if anybody anybody hasn't heard of you know if you don't know Rodney Dangerfield where the hell Ya been but just go on that Biography and see the life that he led that biography from beginning to end novels unbelievable. It's you hope your life you know can come out like his was and he had a really tough time he literally like stopped. Here's like Joe Deangelis at the guy I can't but like literally like his wife died of cancer and he stopped show business. Okay here's the deal. He told his when you're GONNA move on the House. You're going to be like the mom and I'm going to be the DAD. And then he went to work as a Aluminum siding he did alone him citing until the kids got into college then went back into this show was but truthfully when he got on. TV back in the In a late sixties on the the big the big. Show the Ed Ed Sullivan show. which was the biggest show Sunday night? That was the show. America stopped and watched that you would have like you know. Eighty million people. If there was like the Beatles would watch or you'd have like a you know an off night thirty five forty million people want to show fifty million and so that was it once you get on that show you are in you know and so he did get get on that show but you can just see you. When he was he was still like in his late thirties or early forties? He just looked it just looked like a longshoreman. Like a guy who was On enforcer red tie well this before he found out Marino became rodney okay and then And then but by the time like you know a caddyshack came around That was like you know. He's softened up. Became this old guy old stiff guy he basically as you know. The shoulders was on the shoulders of the knees. And the head and the eyes popping out you know but Anyway I got on how got on. That was my I love. I'm a huge huge. Ronnie Fan. Met Him one time. Backstage with Harry. Basil Yeah and he's in. The ROBIE is watching out for some movie. He was working on on robe. Dick Yeah and I remember at that point. I realized the difference between the Headliners Green Room and the openers green room because he had like this beautiful full giant rumors spread with food food. Sometimes puny shrimp into Harry's dressing room and it was just the the tales from Guilani. Trump was different. I may have told the story on this podcast ready but like we flew out to go see Rodney was Adam Sandler and it was Gwen Tarantino and Jutta Patel and me and I forget but Tarintino came game in his pajamas and he didn't bring any close with them. We're going to be staying overnight right. He doesn't he's leaves in his pajamas and he just just like in the whole time. He's GonNa come back and it's pajamas. And so not exactly like a very small plane. Not Not the guy you want the coming back the same clothes and that's all I'm gonNA say anyway so we go see. Rodney Rodney smokes pot. You know he's been and I. I had dinner with one time. And he's like he's depressed and I went. This is an odd question and I said did the I don't know I mean like why are you depressed my whole life. I've been down. Yeah my whole life. I've been down. I've been smoking audits. Why is smoking pot for the back smoking pot for thirty years? The only reason I'm still alive. Wow Yeah and so so anyway As I remember I WANNA like. Sometimes I get a little bit start mumbling like I do sometimes and he looked at me and said whatever and so anyway so we're we're we took the flight out we go see him and Rodney go see him. Perform onstage. We'll get great seats since packing. You know and it's like a Saturday night or whatever and he murders in the middle of a SEC. I've got a couple of friends out though some terrific young comedians. Adam Adam Sandler Rob Schneider. Hey great the heavy air boys and hey I got a lot of jokes. So what And then after the show we go up to his You know he's got a suite at the top of the hotel like the headliners right. And he's up and of course you know his Dick's hanging out throw he's got the rope and the Dick always and then He stole that from him so anyway. So we go up to the top of the room and then Rodney. He's very wanted to make sure that he was still current. You you know that he was still that his stuff and so the way he would ask questions. So how does he act what you guys think. What did you think it was square? That was Was it the nineteen forties vernacular. You know forty food was at square. Was it not hip and then you know Tarantino and also. He was smoking smoking at that time. Smoking pretty strong marijuana and Tarantino was already baked at that point looks over to Rodney and he says he's already think boys was he did. Did you think it was square and Tarantino didn't understand the question or didn't understand the context of the question and he looks at riding. Hey man he could not have been any square. Wear on your the square EST man. I'm telling you it could not you the epitome of square. If you look square you'll be like that was it man. The Square is unbelievable and Rodney was shaken like even at the wrong way with. He did Rodney. We're like what a Fox this guy as Roma's and I had to jump in and go. No no no no no no. He didn't mean that square. You mean like you didn't mean that in the square like not a hip way right and thank thank. The squiggly sobered up realizing that the guys failings the Great Rodney. And it's no no no man you on square this. You couldn't have been less square nat Nat Square at all me and I mean like Whoa I. And that's that's what they brought him. What the Hell is going on with this guy anyway and then jut appetite appetite wanted to go and gamble? Because we're in Vegas you know this is like twenty years ago. He was a young guy. The young ish guy at the time youngest of all of us in though we WanNa go gamble in Vegas stories that come on Rodney come on. Let's go gamble gamble. And he said Hey I'm GONNA lose and he's come running. How do you know you're GONNA lose said look at me? Do I look like like a guy who's GonNa win. I'm a loser. Look at me and says come on. Let's just go down. Let's go down so anyway. He he agreed he puts on some shorts. which is like a it just a gift to hide the decorating? And then he What's on like Like a little half robe or something like what do they call those things. It's like a little Japanese. He's Wro but whatever they call those come on Japanese robe. I duNNo. Okay good you but anyway so then we go downstairs and he wants to play craps so we play craps and I swear to God the dice when he rolled the dice then even hit the other end of the table. They didn't enroll Canadian. Throw them soft they just they just can't you know he's got his energy in the dice and like he he lost he said I'M GONNA lose five hundred bucks on. I'm going to go to bed and that's what I said. Are you going to. How do you know you're going to lose you know? And then so we're GONNA says the crab he rolls and like and then just craps out and then he rolls and then craps out and I will come on. Give him the dice again. He's GonNa crap crap that he lost five hundred bunch like literally like I don't know it was less than ten minutes and he looked at me what I tell you. I'm a loser. I'm going to bed what I tell you. Kimono Komo money yeah. He wore a little white kimono with shorts yet white shorts. And you know this old guys who were there pull their socks up. Yes you know because when you get an older you know you think about when you're younger you don't pull your socks all the way up. You know scheme slid down right and someone go no socks these days. I know I'm never going to be one of those guys. Who are those little hidden hidden socks? Yes do you know. I don't. I can't be friends with anymore if I do not do that. That says to me anymore. You treasure your friendship. Okay no I do not wear those. I don't like I have a problem. That says a lot about a person. If you're hot. If you wearing those all saw it says you are. You're hiding something something you're cheating and lying life about something and that's not that's not good. You can't wear those if you're a guy if you're a girl I get it you know I have a question. Yeah so in the store you had said he was curious because you guys were sort of the young guys comedians and supported us and he wanted to know my hip. Whatever if you ever have that because I definitely do when when there's like a young dude on the show? Yeah and they're super hip just a couple ages type of thing sometimes. I want plot that approval from them. Do you ever feel that at all. I you know I do watch some of the young guys I think support. I'm at Chris. Rock called me a few years back and we're talking and he said he was telling the He's watching a young comedian. It was really really popular now and he said I get it. He didn't say thought he was hilarious. I I get it but you gotTa Watch what the young kids doing get an idea of that and I agree. You know to see what's happening. I mean like when you and I saw a Chapelle like four or five five years ago God. That was seminal for us because you know I think he was at the top of his game and then like just to see him incredible destroy and also just the challenge in audience and do it on a Wednesday night. I do too ours in San Francisco is incredible. I mean I didn't realize you could do that. I remember watching him and thinking. I don't think I do the same job Ah what you realize when guys like like that and then Chris Rock I would put in the same category and Bill Burr and Louis. CK I would say like people go to see him. It's it's almost like In this very secular world that we live in. It's almost like they people are going to see them for some sort of soothsaying. You know they're looking you for wisdom almost like a and I'm not saying almost it is like a religious experience in the sense of they really do want to You know Ah have some connection to something so I don't say that like it's like I think it is. I think people seem to you know like especially back in two thousand fifteen sixteen whenever ever. They go to see him because there was so much. There's so much noise in the media and there's so much stuff out there and the and the you know how do you say when they see guys like Dave Chapelle and Chris Rock's please make sense of the world for us. He started talking about marriage and how to make a relationship work and I was so I couldn't wait to hear what the solution or or what you hope for that nugget of what and then he will give it. Yeah he was talking about was beautiful he was talking at that time. This is like four or five years ago so it was still new at the time talking about comparing the African American experience. So what black people go through to trans people go through and who has it worse and it was just such two wonderful You know look at such an interesting thing that you and I would never spend our time probably doing right right and a great perspective. Take my God so anyway I mean I I don't know he's he's still just incredible but Yeah so but no. I don't know when I see the young young guys I mean truthfully like I would say. Stand up comedies. Different than I would say staying or or we should say is different than a lot of other art forms or different than athletics. Athletics in your twenties. You're at your best will say that like it's in my opinion and you can correct me if I'm wrong or if you if you think differently because I'm not wrong wrong a lot is that if you it's like it's similar to like an opera singer like a male tenor if they don't they don't get to their best until learner mid-forties what I'm saying like PA Barada. It just takes a while that chest barrel out and whatever it takes you know not in your twenties in your thirties forties by that time you're like forty four for bom your at your peak and I do feel like it takes twenty years. You know as a stand up the early hit into that fifteen twenty years it really is no shortcut hundred percent though. I think absolutely I will say I totally agree. I will say when I worked with this dude in Vegas. He he was just so clever and original and funny and it. It made me question my set like really take a look at my side and I found myself getting almost jealous and so I did. Was We totally get along and actually actually asked him. I go do this where I was watching you and I find myself getting a little jealous. 'cause you're like this young and I go. I would like to pay you to watch my set and tell me what you think. My my best late night set would be so kind of turn it around right where it was like A. Yeah and then he was like dude. Don't pay me I WANNA ask you about this shit with acting with whatever it's just having this great that's nice fourth. That's coming from a place of being secure guy. Don't you think you were not that secure like fifteen years ago. Definitely no I. Wasn't that secure. Yeah Yeah three years. I feel like it's really changed. I mean I do feel like like the other night I was performing into place. We did two shows on a Monday. 'cause I'm working on new comedy special and and thank you for every little tag you've given me on this special know how your names on there. It's going to be in the you know for sure. But like the There's the opening comedian and and I said who is in in Denver Nice Guy. I'm sorry I forget his name and he did really well but like I just don't think like and Addison should I not say something because he did like five minutes on his Dick and I said like you know may be and I said I do Dick Jokes and I do jokes that are but I said maybe we have you ever sold out show you know with the headliner. Maybe you try some new material or do some stuff. That's a little more challenging where you can grow and use this packed audience and is it. Should I say that and waste my time or does he. Is He gonNA appreciate it or is this guy always going to be insulted or hurt his feelings. I remember this guy. You showed me a set list. It was just a picture of his Dick so anyway I said So did you say I said No. I'm not GonNa say and then at the end of the night I did. I was leaving so you know what you know. And then he said there's maybe not. Do you know the last five minutes on your Dick. You put a packed crowd tissues the crowd. I used to like it because you never know what's going to happen to you. View opened up for somebody. So you know I opened up for like you know Jerry Seinfeld Dana Carvey and then like you know Dennis Miller in the a day and then you know then because I opened over Dennis Miller and I did really good it was clean and good material. He recommended for Letterman show. Wow so like and then I got a Saturday and I live so holy Shit. Dennis Miller gift to comedy besides still being a great comedian. Unfortunately like you know anyone who slightly conservative you don't go along with the Liberal Intelligentsia L.. Jhansi the murder. You even Bill Marr. It was extremely too liberal for me in the sense of just not really Being Open minded to like the other side of the coin You know you just get excoriated right And but Dennis this is still brilliant and is really always been really funny and just I mean his stuff was well I mean just I mean he would. He would really leap manufacturer his bits and his and the way that he would his wording and and to create his own voice which is a very unique voice in stand up and you know harder hardest have a unique voice in stand up and he had it and still has it. I saw I worked with You know last year and he was ridiculously great very current and awesome and So you know. I was very lucky and so so anyways I said that the guy you never know. That's very true. You never know what what want you never know but I would I would try out material and And I also do my you know if you have an audience. That's when you get to really tell if it works because you know most the time when you start now you're working in some shady played people you don't know what's really working. Oh absolutely he kinda helps you wait till it's packed Friday and Saturday okay. Well this really does work You know for sure so anyway anyway did say something and then you know what he said to me. While I was doing that material I was thinking I shouldn't be doing this. Material is a great answer. Yeah so at least he was honest about also also like you know. I think it's important because the great comedians and I mean this. The Great Comedians were always great to the other comedians. Who They thought? We're going to have the chance to go. Oh somewhere like literally like Dana carvey maybe the most generous nicest comedian that you can ever work with. And and definitely the most talented guys next Robin Williams the most a successful comedian Debra Commodity San Francisco. Those two guys were so good they found other guys like me. They wouldn't let me. There's gotTa be another guy like Dana Carvey and that's how I got discovered But this guy you know the seminal advice he would offer to as other comedians like I remember I moved to. LA DROVE DOWN TO LA together. And we're staying is apartment. He was he's doing some tells Dana Dana Carvey and we're as a why isn't this guy the biggest star as the most most talented comedian. San Francisco's hilarious. You know before he was famous he was selling out every Sean San Francisco. This guy was incredible characters and everything and they just you know Hollywood. Hollywood doesn't necessarily know how to use people Saturday. Night live was perfect for him but I remember like thinking to myself before that he got on some. TV show. NBC was playing a helicopter pilot. And they said we're we're GONNA be funny but they only let it be the last two minutes of the show. He's in a helicopter avenue. Bits you know this other guy I forget it was called and it's called Blue Thunder something Mike that and I just remember it was like such an amazing thing I said is that if this guy struggling the most talented guy to come out of San Francisco go but what the hell am I worried about right then. I should be struggling absolutely right. And it's good to know that you know to like there's this it's tough it's tough and and It of course he's went on to become one of the greatest the performance ever in the history Saturday night live but like senator way going back to that like you know those clubs in those opportunities you have. You never know you know what I do for you. I don't know if this is the writer. The wrong is the right thing. I guess now that I'm thinking back. I opened for you you at Nazareth College at a better. I'd never met you. We met for a few seconds. I went up on stage and before I went up I was like what jokes would rob schneider like. uh-huh that's legitimately what I did. I water my Mo- anybody can kill. Anybody can get lost but I remember going just in case he watches. Like what are the weirdest weirdness. Most clever jokes I have. You heard that did so much better than me that night. Man You murder. No you did great and But I just remember memorized like this is a guy who writes juncture forms jokes and you reminded me of like one of my favorite comedians. That I that I started with. WHO originally from Seattle my buddy drake say there? was you know God rest. The souls passed away now but Got Actually Yeah February fifth. Yeah it was I think-i you need March third. Two thousand three passed away but anyway he just he was a joke Smith he would just form jokes and just like making a compact have a good beginning middle end very logical progression. Do you remember a favourite Drake's Oh God is so many of them. It's like my My wife thinks surname nosy. At least that's what. She keeps scribbling in her diary. Isn't it pretty good job of it and Isa Lisa and stuff like that. I like jokes that only he could do. It's like that only like like is in other words it's like his voice like clubs my girl. I said my girlfriend's I. What do you WANNA do? I WanNa do you WanNa do really you WANNA go. Fuck that girl in the skirt over there and We're gonNA take quick break. We're GonNa talk about work done. Thank you for joining us on this I don't even know what this is about comedy. COMSUMER names that sounds good comedy suitors. And we'll be right back if you're listening to the PODCAST. Once you know this is also available on Youtube oop See what happens podcast. So you can check that out too or just listened. While you're driving your Fedex truck all right. Here's some dates to see Rob Schneider. I'm doing a bunch of gigs. Getting Ready for my comedy. My comedy special. That I'm shooting reading that's GonNa be a February twenty ninth in Salt Lake City Salt Lake City the Gene Wagner Theater. All right right so the first first couple of shows are sold out but I think we can. We might be adding your show there because we're going to be shooting and I'd love to have you come out. I love shooed dude. I love being in Salt Lake City such great crowds and like you know happy. Come out and then I'm going to be in the funny anybones Toledo. I haven't been there in ten years and that's the thirteenth of February And then The Funny Bone Liberty Township Ohio Ohio which is a great little room basically basically Cincinnati there and that's The fourteenth of February and the fifteenth of February. Okay Nick and then Mark Ridley's Comedy Castle Royal Oak. I've only been there one time about five. Six years of your Royal Oak. That's GONNA be February sixteen and That's GonNa be one night right. No wait a minute one night. Yeah one nine Grin Improv. Rally rally. I'll be in February twenty first twenty. Second Hi Madeleine and And that'll and that and then that's it. Also the twenty thirty every Sunday show the degree. And then I'll be with you in Washington. DC DC Improv. Twenty four and twenty twenty a Tuesday awesome greats okay. You're listening to see what happens. podcast you can do it and we're back we're back CASO Rodney. gave me this after he passed away. My gave out all the pallbearers is so this gift is really nice. Rodney signature on this glass enclosed shoehorn. And he said this is what I use for my Dick do you have is still yeah. It's gotta be someone somewhere. Yeah Yeah I get this thing. I found this this those up here. What do you got by the way ROB's office? I don't know if you can see much of it on video but it's an museum basically of cool Shit O'Brien's for what Conan Conan O'Brien script oh the SNL. Yeah wow he's a writer there. The first year him and Greg Daniels who are writers they were partners. Holy Shit Al Franken. Great Story about there is this thing. One of the biggest disasters ever in television was a show called the north the North report or the north something and And it was it was going to be like a late night. Show whatever. And he was one of the writers and producers of it Blah Blah Blah and. It didn't go very well. But I remember like the one St butchering the story. I'm sure he'll tell a lot better but he's like you know the show I was going. The ratings are horrible. The North report the northern report. Whatever and the ratings are really bad shows about to get cancelled and then CONAN comes in and the producers? Billy you believe hey guys come on and man how I anyway have. Hey man have whatever you want right over there. And he goes whatever he wanted. He looks over his the bits of bagels and crumbs. Anyone like Oh man. That's all I have whatever you want. What the Hell's this half a Bagel have whatever you want to finish whatever you want over there but anyway this is fascinating so this is a meeting to get it back to them for thirty years so cool but anyway I don't I gotta throw some stuff film wife's going to organize that means a dumpster? I'm getting organized on. Earth does stuff going to dumpster every out there literally. Every six months I come to rob us. Impact is throwing things away giant dumpster every six months or so. The only thing is protected. ACAS this room. This is like my one place. I can come in and be protected. This chair sucks though gotta get more comfortable. I want to get the most comfortable chair ever made and just put it right back here. Do you know you can never leave this room you can spend my friend at. CBS see next me. He had this chair in one. Daegu I send your chair. I WANNA nature so I sat in this. This is it. This is the chair. This is the bus error. Twelve hundred dollars really. That's all offer a chair. I would spend always been like this is a piece of shit. He just looks at Saint Colors. The desk it sent me the link is I was pretending Afford twelve hundred dollar chair but I have you can. I guess I'll get free birthday. I'd love that. Hey what's Look at this nice picture of us by by the way. Come on me and you. What is this? Oh picture from Overseas we were either in Career sure Guatemala. I think we're up North Pole in Greenland Greenland that the US Army Air Force Base House. Fun Remember they told us we might not be able to land but we could land her going to trial. Yeah number that. There's a window where you can get in to tell the story where you are overtook overtook podcast. Where you and I are at the airport in working for the military and everything's organized? Everything's on schedule. Everyone has your paperwork and we're supposed to get on this flight. That goes like eight hours. There's to Miami and then it was going to like Honduras or something like our hours it two hours but it turned out where we were. If we had like our own plane it would only take an hour to get to the next day. We're taking a commercial flight back to Miami is going to take all day and so rob spots these. You know the air force guys. Yeah and he goes you guys anybody on a plane. You could give us a lift over to and I go. This is the military. You can't just say he wanNA ride and the guys date. We almost made it happen. I make it up. Do you remember the scariest thing was our flight was boarding. Yeah and we still did not have an answer yet yet as to whether or not we'd be getting the short flight over to play was boarding but we're not GonNa know go rob the flights boarding so I guess we should and and you're like just wait and I'm like yeah just wait. You like. Let the plane leave. We didn't have an answer and they didn't take they didn't take we'd made it and that's when you know you're famous Vamos diminished. That's how you measure you know if you can get into the diamond lounge the airport and you're not a member you must have a new movie out or not get into the Diamond Lounge. I haven't done anything in a while. You know yeah but The military is very strict about things and we almost got out. It was so close but but I mean all those guys couldn't be better as great nicer. We're going to do another one coming out. I'll let you know about that. It's good it's always good to every couple of years over whenever to go loudon and then because it's the greatest audience man. I'm Marie telling me a technique for a handshake and I go. I'm not gonNA need this in your hand from from shaking like three hundred hands it literally gets swollen hands. Broken you would. It does Abraham Lincoln and the and the historical society in Chicago. There's the Because he's from there in Illinois Right There is a a cast basically of his hand and where he had to hold onto that after his inauguration 'cause he shook ten thousand hands and he broke his hand so anyway so that when I was overseas to do he said you're gonNA shake fifteen hundred hands today. This is the sergeant major like the number one guy in the army. Sergeant Major said. Listen you're going to beginning to protect yourself because these guys are really really strong. He's GonNa crush hang are happy to see him that I can do in a purpose so you just gotTa get in there. And so his his technique was to get in and put the Buke fingers on the wrist. So they can't kill you. Yes your pointer finger in your middle finger and you shake goes onto the wrist game. Change get in there and then they can't kill you because it was one of the good ones. I've never forgotten the sometimes when you do forget to do that. Then you crushed right. Oh Yeah Oh hell yeah. It was ridiculous and I'm like midget anyway. They can kill my hands but it Yeah those are good trips. They're very memorable amazing. Unbelievable whether you take with you for low strips I love you again i. It's just you just feel like Mike. It's just extreme gratefulness. The entire time and just feeling so lucky to do what we do to the point where people thank us for going over there. It's almost embarrassing. That were being thanked. I know what they're sacrificing being away from family and Fran risking their lives. You know I mean like It's whatever you can do for these guys you know I remember like sticking around and like other take some pictures of the VIP's the VIP's the VIP's which is everybody. This was so great I remember one there. VIP's but we we're like who else isn't there risking in their lives or away from their fame right these guys in the Army Air Force they're all VIP's no non view but the one night there were easily eleven hundred people in the car uh-huh and the promoter was like we're GonNa have you will have just enough time day pictures with the seventy five people that like one the VIP thing whatever and from stage Roger Goes. We're taking pictures with everybody. Eleven hundred year there for hours. It was great but it is really funny. Nobody it's the right thing to do if you're already there. Yeah tell us we're GONNA and it was great. It was fun. I have a question for you. This is really unrelated. Good but I just got a haircut. Yeah too short today today. Okay too short. I I was one of those to share because I was GONNA say your wife she goes. Oh Jamie got a haircut and then that was at the end of it usually somebody goes got hair and they follow it with it. Looks Good it looks good you like she just goes. Hey you got a haircut. Yeah she'll be she was just saying that wasn't a good move. That's what I felt. You know what I'm saying because hair is really important for for people before you. It's crazy import. It is because if you do much go from like a a seven to two to Irish just expose too much of your head to I. It's a bad thing I should hang my hat on. You should put your hat on or go with the at least the headphones hiding some of that bad here. I don't know if it's GonNa make sense if I wear these out of this. You know you have to spend more than ten dollars to get Erica. I don't know if I was trying to get my money's worth I go. How much can you give me for? Forty five how much getting used to it but like now you think let you know he got good hair he should use their the problem. I have is when I start. I'm obsessed with working Arizona Zest and when I hate having the long but I mean given the new new information about what my head and face looks like the five point reduction out of ten. I'll take the hour ahead of the gym. I'm the same way but I like if I don't have my hair figured out. I'm unlike I swear to God. Patricia thinks about divorcing. Every time she looks like I don't know if I could live with that head and as I have to really be careful in the morning I get qu off. You know what the what's left to cough. I wouldn't even worse. I came in really expecting a compliment from some. I came in hot. Really really cocky. No you shouldn't lingo too short. You look good short but not too short too long either okay. You're not a guy who could do pull off a mullet. You know what I mean. It'll grow getting older. And let's be honest your forties you. You gotta like have certain amount you know you can't if you're in the military it's a good cut if you're not okay. Not all right and I'm not in the military so that's officially an insult so dude. How about the phone hearing everything you say and then like the foot? It's crazy how about that. And that's what we're talking about Rob's wife just got a pellet on bicycle yeah for me I think because you put it right next to my side of the bed. I used to twenty minutes early. I did twenty. Let's get for me. It was my best workout. It's hard right right. Yeah it is but it's really good. No I mean I'm sold. I mean the Peleton. I'd we're not sponsored by anybody but I will say that that's it's a good thing. There really is good because you know what's good about it. The machine works and the but the guys the people that are helping. You seem to be very very you know you do the program and they have the leader of the class guys looking right at you going. Come on man you got to love. The it's very positive reminds me of like the antithesis of my childhood talk radio. When do you turn off Robert Hall? You know but I. I think you're supposed to get good grades as where I grew up. This is so nice. It's very it's very very you know the parent you always wanted and yeah so it's good but I say to you. I love that bike. I think I would really love Peleton. Treadmill Yeah Yeah I go because I'm like a walker sprint. I walk into the kitchen. I pull up instagram and the first thing on my instagram feed is an ad not just repentant and for the treadmill wow it to their listening no no they are and right below that kind. Why are we okay with that? Right below that condoms. Because they're listening before talking doc. Monday right over. Yeah which is disgusting. Jamie you gonNA stop doing. Hey No that's that's true. Why are we okay with that? Why don't why don't they go? Burn Google down and Apple Headquarters went on people. Why don't people wiesner legislation? Because I don't think people care I think they're so distracted there so unhappy with their luxury items and I like the government and I think like big tack and all that stuff they depend on our addiction to this stuff and I I think it is an addiction. Absolutely I mean. It's a but like modern convenience. I remember like Henry. Miller has that book you know the talks talks about the whereas it here the misery of of air conditioning. And how it's ruined the world. What was it called the I forget? It's is is a Greek title. Oh it's called Fuck air conditioning. Colossal of I can forget it's I'll look it up but I'll have David look it up and put it on the the thing but it just talks about how my air conditioning is like ruined the ruined the world. You should get used to be hot. It's hot deal with it as part of the world. We never air-conditioned growing up. You didn't right now sometimes. It was hot. You can sleep So hot both your hot every night. You had to do something about it from the window. You put a fan on. Yeah like I. I think I've told August before. Like my buddy Martin. Landau was up there pitcher somewhere. Yeah they said what did you do before air-conditioning and he's my mom would just in Brooklyn late open up the windows at night and she takes the sheets and then she would wet them she would soak in the bath tub and cold water wring out and put him on the bed as the water's coming out called. Could you download brilliant people. People find a way but I think I did on behalf of instagram. I Google like are they listening to us and using it for ads are they in the CEO says absolutely one hundred percent not your microphone is only enabled for videos. Whatever and he says that's a lie and he says it's either lock orcas that was on the top of your mind or whatever but it was the the treadmill I wasn't even the so that's got to be such a small part of their business? Yes how we doing we should probably you get the hell out of here and drive to We've got a GIG tonight San Diego which it promoted because they're gonNA come on after the GIG already finished. Okay if you guys want to go back in in time you could see Jamie. Listen I and it sold out so go away go back before the go back in time before. This was still tickets because it's small club. I don't think we're awesome. Gigantic theater in San Diego. We're just brushing up and having fun for a couple of hours at low head comedy store tonight but we are going to be Together yes in In Washington DC. which is one of the premier comedy clubs? I think it's one of the last original comedy clubs where they haven't made it into like a comedy mall you know it's too big. Big Comedy clubs should be this underground basement hellhole. Where are you going to hide in the dark? And laugh horrible ideas. And you know and and where you don't get judged by and that's one of the last ones left is that that Improv in Washington. DC loving when are we going to be their twenty fifth and Twenty Six of February twenty two twenty six and there's still some tickets available apple for the comedy special shooting. You come out for that all coming out twenty ninth. Yeah so you're going to do a warm up. It's a little different than your standard all right there. The director wants you to different stuff. Okay so but it's the twenty nine th there's two shows and there's a few tickets left we just opened up a few. We just added a row. Took a camera out. But there's going to be. It's a beautiful show sweet. It's going to be very special in a my comedy special. Can't wait. Fly Me to the Moon with Rob Schneider. And that's GONNA be February twenty-ninth Salt Lake City and end waiting for anybody that Wishes they could have made it to the San Diego. You're actually back there for a weekend later on this year. Why don't you come with me so I'd love to go the McAfee? We'll just Jackie Robinson. Thank you Jamie for doing this. And the yeah. It's always fun to reminisces stuff when the good news. I mean you were more stories ahead. We're going to be working on making an announcement announcement about our new TV show. We'll be doing that soon. And thank you for listening to see what happens. We'll have dates go to ROB SCHNEIDER DOT COM. And how do people find you you've I in my website is ROB SCHNEIDER DOT COM. And I'm I'm on instagram. But I M Jamie listen. Do people really go on that. Russia is not a ton of people. Do that on updated. It's like it's a good job. A few hundred okay. It'll be good job for tonight. Okay thanks for listening and thanks for watching on Youtube see what happens it will catch again until then see what happens

Rob Schneider Rodney Rodney Dick Jamie Rodney Dangerfield Dick Yeah murder Vegas Dana Carvey carson Dennis Miller Google Harry Basil Jamie Foxx Youtube Chris Angel Fox Bernie Schwartz San Francisco
The Bill Bert Podcast | Episode 18 w/ Bob Saget

The Bill Bert Podcast

1:33:38 hr | 4 months ago

The Bill Bert Podcast | Episode 18 w/ Bob Saget

"Hey everybody! How are you welcome to another edition of the bill or pod cast? Today, we have with us. Oh, Jesus, judging already that fucking face. What is the biggest? This guy is bigger than the Hollywood. Sign these. Same Monster. Both good and bad in this business, please. Welcome Mr Bob Sang. Thank. Please hold your applause to the end. Those warrants in the background acknowledge. A bunch of Shit is a Rodney Dangerfield statue right there got word for that, and that I got inducted into the TV Hall of fame right there, because further video show for people get hit the nuts. My gone on. My God can tell you that that show that show I'm being dead serious when I want my. My first time hanging out with my wife on a Sunday at her house when we first started dating, she put on America's funniest home videos now as a comic I was like I'm going to watch this I. Don't I don't need to see this. I got a high level of says humor. She's like no. This is the greatest show you ever watch. America's funniest home videos and Bob I saw one with this black dude was a white guy dressed as a as a scarecrow with the Halloween candy in his lap, and like a cheerleader comes up, and then the guy goes, Lou and Agila goes. And this blackbird comes up. I never say I used to watch this every day. It made me laugh. Black Dude comes up. He's got. On he's talking about some some construction work. He's got lined up reaches in and the white. Guy Scarecrows. The Black Guy goes. Knocks him unconscious. fucking dying laughing didn't win. And Graham good ones never won. It was always the city one of the maybe in the fucking stroller gay. You know why because they didn't let the ones win. That were international, so they would buy those and they do like a trade like cards. They would trade videos, so they wouldn't fly somebody from Sweden 'cause. That's expensive, so they only domestic or sometimes Canada clips. That show is really groundbreaking as far as that was sort of like youtube before youtube. Show all those videos. You know fail army and epic fail whatever the hell they call it like. That was sort of took from your show. And everything online. I mean everything I look at. Things put on. INSTAGRAM is not hits and just people. Pants fall down there. They have to scramble the signal of their deck. That's how I see Pena's anyway when I would go into locker room, everybody's a scramble. That's Australia or WANNA be so bad. I WANNA be straight. Now Right. Now you can get a show. You can get your own bathroom or something. There's a lot of movement in that direction. Finally came out and now you're, you're crawling back in well, you know I I did Fuller House if that's not doubling down on that. How crazy is it though that that one of the cool things about you? When when when I first came out to La was like you were the full House Dad, and then you would get on stage and talk about contests and contact. I didn't say Kinda lot only only about exes. No, I didn't do that I. Really didn't say it, but you know, but you would. You would curse the lot and everyone. Kerr's did good. Today if that was today, meaning, if you on full House now, and that was the hit kind of family show and you went on stage and talk. Course you get cancelled the fucking second. Like Jeff Carlin, he's on like the number. One family show the Goldbergs so then you got to double-whammy Jewish family and and it's a hit show and he gets on stage in says says whatever he wants. You know and goes out, but it's not like Blake I was blatantly doing dig joke after Dick Joe. Bill knows bill knows. And just imagery for me. It was like hitting a by news blocks habits at as a template. For my entire career, as far as writing closing, bits and stuff like that. You GotTa go Dick. Joke, you know. You Guy. I've ever seen to be able to stain it. Though lot of people once they get into the deck, joke thing, it's gotta be towards the end of. Or else there's nowhere to go, but now with Bob. Endlessly exploring every fold. It's a through line. Watch area, every vein every avenue every vessel. Well rotten. That's not true. He's also incredible. Musician Plays Guitar Grady things a little bit. He's got all kinds of awards. You takes compliments well. I'll be benefits for people as much as he tries to be edgy. As a big old softy in there. Well. Fuck Outta me one time. We did a college together Bob. Do you remember this? And, I know we did. Where was it? It was in New York and You paid me five thousand dollars to open for you and I. Remember getting the check in the like you got onstage. I go back. There's an envelope I get to check and I'm like holy. Shit this. How? How Young I was I thought I got your check, so it's like I went up to you and I was like I think. They gave me you're checking. Mine's a lot bigger bunny. No, but you were really funny, and they only see on tape and stuff, and then they said. How's how's this and I know he's great, and but it is a mistake was supposed to be five hundred I was I took a loss, but Social Awkwardness right and I knew it would come out eventually. In a situation like this podcast King? But you know something you all the painting him by forty five hundred bucks and I'm sure. He told twenty thousand people, so that money came right back to. You I've I've told everyone how you overpaid me. I remember as I remember. It was like the biggest that was like five thousand dollars when I just had Georgia that was a game changer that was like okay. Rents taken care for three months. I mean that's. Two things if you give me a good intro bringing me on stage, I. Never Forget it. If you paid me well I'm never people have paid well, you doubt Shit spreads like wildfire with other comics. Like Me Very happy that I did that because I would never do that today. because. There's no way I mean you're you I have to ask you Bert does drive in thing. Is it on hold or are you doing it? Go? I think everything's sold out, so it's June July. That's your summer. You're going to be doing drive INS, June July I'm doing drive in movie theaters and stand up at drive in movie theaters. I think I got to travel with the stage, so we bring the stage with us. Show start at eight and It's GonNa. Be Fun! I like I think it's going to be one of the things Mar- you look at it and you go, we'll never. I'm never going to do this again. And now's when it's safe, and it's a way to do. Stand up so. I'm kind of excited I like trying to front tyrannous of it is what I like, you know. Yeah, but you look like you're grizzly. Adams, right now I mean you're there and I have A. Question. I'm sure you've probably talked about it. Your stand up, but you do you shower in full clothing? Do you, do you sleep? Fully clothed, and the only when you're working, everything comes off. Of My shirt on I. put it on just because I. Like the corner razzle-dazzle it. Right keep them guessing. A. Drive ins out there. That's been on my bucket list to go. See I, like I wanted to take. My wife is like one or two left in the La area, and I always wanted to take my wife. No! There's only one now after last night. There's only one. No. They're popping up. They're all over the place in a students I announced. It started hitting me up everywhere and so we may add some shows because. It's I. Remember seeing. Doing two shows shows late, show starts late. You got to do it when the sun sets. You got it you can't. Son's got to be down to start the show and and it should be interesting. You know I I I. Hope I hope they're fun shows. Up on the screen. On the big screen and on in front of the screen, so re cameras yourself then you got people shooting at three cameras, so it's like you're watching a special. And then all the All the audio goes right through their FM players on their into their cars. I love this this to me I. Love Shit like that it's. Like I used to do a show called the collins sick to work. Contract work, so I go and do radio from eight to ten drink on air, and then I go right to the comedy club and tell everyone radio work. Don't go to work and I come to the club. They'd open up a club like eleven and we do a show at noon, and that was the funnest fucking shows I, would ever do because everyone's day drinking. That's like saying. HOW HAMMERED DID PEOPLE GET BILL? People got so fucked up. I the last one I did was in Tampa. I gave Sa- girls number out on stage, and then and they were chanting the machine and I just I. I go I'm not doing it and I walked off. Don't remember getting paid I. Don't remember getting home all I. Know is I wake up in a house. Right been our life I wake up in this house and I'm looking around and Mike who's fucking house Mayan I go out a no one's in the house. It's a really Nice House. No one's in the house and I'm sitting here going I. Don't have my cell phone I. Don't know where my cell phone is. I don't know where it is, and I'm looking at this house and all of a sudden I. See a picture, my sister in this house. It's a picture of my sister. When she was a kid, a look around also door opens. My Dad walks in. My parents bought a new house. That's fantastic. WHAT THE FUCK! Where are we? He goes. Oh, we got a new house I. showed it to a bigger drunk. I was like Holy Shit. And the and the question to that answer is. How do you make a comedian? Exactly wakes up in his new house and doesn't know it with his real parents. Hey, opened, invite to either of you guys. If you WANNA come out and do one of these drive in movie, theater shows Shits and giggles. Where is it that we're doing June twenty-fourth in Charlotte than Tulsa Than Indy and then Fort, Collins and then I think we're going to keep adding them, I'm just gonNA. Stay out on the bus. OUT HERE IN LA. I. Got An offer from then is there's something like that I would do that. I'd come in and do guest set, and then give you the intro and I get the same check I paid you right? By the way I'm GonNa be getting mantle thing. I would do Tulsa. Yeah. I Love Oklahoma and I also love that city man. What is it the? With theaters is at. The Brady Theater. Shit. There's also promoted. There had this old Cadillac. Let me driving around before the show. Thing was just like you know. Floating on a cloud that suspension. Everything was messed up, but it was. It was amazing. The Oklahoma Bill to be like the opening scene to the outsiders when they hit pony, boy and Johnny drive-in. When Dean del Rey Open for me out there he went to the I was tired. He goes dude. He's the outsider houses down the street it's. to Go see, and of course I didn't go. That came before the show. How was he is always killer? Say. They should just feel like you. Just Dean can. Nobody can sell your shit like Dean del Right so by for our listeners out there. is in Malibu I. Believe Rolling his own cigars are he started a wine vineyard or some shit? I don't know what you're doing, but it definitely looks like I was just like you know. The rioting and stuff I thought you just. You just left there something that looks like Gilligan's island. It's beautiful here. We're right. Were like five minutes from the beach up in the hills. It's your with your wife. I left her at home. I just thought I'd get away. Leave your at home. Right near. We're all the trouble is I actually got a rental right on Fairfax. Hopefully that something now with the girls in the my wife. Pick some stuff up at canter's and bring it to you in Malibu. The wait, where are you guys at? I know were bill. Is Bob where are you close to where the riots are going now? I'm up on that. Not yet am up on the west side of a hill. Yeah, it's been crazy man like. So upsetting as been so upsetting and yet. To get into it is. My favorite thing at all is white. People explained to black people how they should be failing and how they should be handling this as a very like. They know what they've gone through for thousand years. You know what you're not the problem I mean. At as a person I had the same problem is human. Beings would rather win. Then get to what's right and everything's broken up into teams. Everybody I always say that he's trying to win. People just want to be. They want to be proven that they're right. They don't want the truth. Yes, and everybody does add the hardest thing in the fucking. World is to get out of your own head in realized that some of his experiencing a life different than yours and actually listen. And and the person telling you it's really hard for them to explain their life without the other person feeling like they're getting up. Finger pointed at him. It's it's It's a major defected in a humanity humanity. Yeah, so until they because I feel like. Both sides should be able to sit down. And talk this is so much signed to thrust it into this thing that we all in our own ways of created. Over, sure we're either where either of you persecuted as a kid I was. No I was not the nice actually from my skin tone. Why I wasn't out orange. My hair was, but it was just sort of standard bullying. Over by the COPS for having red hair, but I definitely got a couple of towel whippings during gym class. It's about how. About how rough it got for me! Now I was I got bullied, but not I mean just like regular kid like whatever the. Say like are pretty easy in life like I am example of white privilege. I think. I was in Norfolk. Virginia, and people threw rocks at my head and called me a Jew and it happened a lot and I'm Presbyterian so i. don't understand but. Obviously I am no Jew but I Bags. I brought my ex wife. That's the advantage of doing this in your office. Look? At s seriously look that. Married it. was between those two years. Actually that haircut is what I look like when I was in the fifth grade. Being head, being red headed is probably it's like it's like no one stands up for redheads, but redheads are taunted their entire out. It wasn't as bad south park tipped it over. That episode in for I I was already into adulthood, but they were the ones. They brought it to the forefront. That they've made it like mainstream, and then all of a sudden you know. Like that Ginger Shit. no-one said Ginger. Like no one said that Shit. Like when I went over to. Torn in Europe is the first hour you're ginger agenda. That me. Thank you got ready? Hey, ginger, I'll all right all right. I did sound derogatory. Over there. As much as over here then it seemed like. Some kind of just called me a fucking pussy something over here just as everything just seems to take on a little more of A. Nasty or tone I don't know when it travels so off. Easy, just red-headed. Bullshit like that, but I didn't have an overly complex once that South Park episode came on like that sort of kicked it into. You know it's weird like you have really fun with the Internet. Like how fucking childish people are in how much? That bullying thing really didn't go away as much as you just became an adult. You know not to do that but you get on the Internet and it's just like if there's any way to attack or humiliate or go after somebody that's in a less larger group. It'd just done from the obvious all the racial shit. To anything you know so where you're. You're kind of the example. You've influenced me a lot of because. I'm doing a Lotta material, but. Explain those pathetic awards behind you. One of them is your mother I actually had a replica of of where you came out back there. But always healthy APP that get you through some lonely nights. Yeah, you got. To take them up your MOM's ginger, but I was just. Is that ginger from Gilligan's island? Is that what that is between ginger and Marianne, or is it like one hundred five hundred years old? I. Don't know because. She's a betty was from Archie. Comics, but this I don't know anyway what I was GonNa say bill is your show. Sag It was from full House. He had to say that. I get full House Paraphernalia. If you WANNA lunchbox or a t shirt what I was GONNA say was you're so amazing, if an unlike this onstage especially, but if someone throws one rocket me I throw thousand back. I get like a catapult. I mean if you verbally. That started off as a compliment from me and then quickly just went to all about Bob. Right I haven't had time for therapy bill, but you're. You're to me the master of just not putting up with Shit you just so it's coming through such a real place I. Just I really just look up to you a lot. Cause you. Make me when you're eating for the overhand right here, this is. Go Ahead When you pee on me I'm always looking up to you, but what I'm saying is. So good. In Burt would agree. Don't you think maybe the? Mailing. Esther oppose so he's trying to drag you into this shit, and he's just I think Brentwood agrees trying to throw it to you. It's hard for me to throw a compliment to bill and. Because you won't accept it. But. My Wife's naked you WANNA see hell yeah. No I mean. A Got, one, for you, so what my wife's about a week away from having a our second kid. Congrats, you're the dad, you sure I don't know well. We always get tested. We have sort of an open relationship threat though. I made her these these cheesecake. Peanut Butter cheesecake brownies. Ignore peanut butter cheese brownies. They're actually fucking delicious. So making them as taste, I'm like this is going to be fucking. Great out maker, some sweets or whatever help her up. Like I'm not gonNA eat half the track I'm trying to make myself out to be a hero. Here I'm going Bob Sagging here. I make this fucking thing. And they tell you to line line the fucking tray with aluminum foil, and then spray them. I guess we're these parchment paper, but I just find parchman taper just catches on fire, so I go fine. So I do that all right and they finally finished. It's like eleven thirty at night. Go to eat one, and it's the worst tasting thing I've ever had in my life. I know. I reminded me of this time. I ate a burger when I was shit faced at a patriots game, the head layer fluid all over because we thought we had it lit, and then we put the Burgas on the fire went out. We were hammered, just spraying it all over. That was that I'm a case. I was like Nia. Don't eat them. They're the worst thing I. Ever made. I don't know what the fuck happened I. Put a thousand pounds of sugar. Taste bad and the next morning came downstairs. I saw that slice that I had taken out and I saw the aluminum foil is one tiny piece triangle aluminum foil. Cheap aluminum foil to during the pandemic I can't get the good shit. You know it's just like this X. scale. It rips in half. It was that light I ate a piece ten for. If you have fillings. You're dead if you got metal fillings now. Do. Not Tell you it was like stuck somewhere between my throat, my stomach for like a day and a half. I finally got it out of there, so you should have called me. I. I'd be happy to get anything out of your throat. Sure you would. You're so handsome. Jesus Christ. You just always has to make it fucking uncomfortable about the way. I love your wife a lot. You Know A. Little bit too much. Yeah Yeah your wedding. Hey Bob I'm a question. Where have you lived in? La can started in palms, a single apartment across from a furniture warehouse, and I was GonNa go to USC Foam School, and then I moved to Hollywood couches across the street, and that's how he moved up to the next level. and. I moved to Hollywood. I lived on Camino Palmero down the street from the Magic Castle for all I knew the street, and then I lived in the valley, unsupported with all these shiny shirts when he goes on stage and headlines where the same sure you wear for twelve years. We got fifty black shirt's hanging in the fucking closet. You know and then and then I moved I moved to new. York to do a show that I got fired from. And then I moved back. I moved a lot. I'm living of houses in online. I started renting and then I could afford one. And I got one in the valley on a Valley Vista in Sherman Oaks at that was my first house that I could afford that bought. And then I moved to the Palisades and then got divorced and then rented for awhile now I'm in another area. You know some undisclosed spot. Then how about how about you know? I started thinking like 'cause you know. Everyone's talking about moving out of La and I was just thinking if I could live anywhere in the world, where would i? Mean meaning I didn't have to live in La. Why Bluer talking about leaving La. Because the in Krona virus and. I hope they always leave. Out, and is too many people great. They WANNA act ones acting once. Shows. Come back. Everybody's GONNA come out for pilot season. That exist anymore. No, but I used to have a friend, and he used to come out every year from New Jersey for pilots season like he was migrating geese. I do floral and I went. What but you have to be here? You got to be here all the time there. Wasn't a more policies. There's any time now it's like. I developed something and they're. Come the pilot season, and I would be so excited for the first two weeks the weather, the change of scenery, and then the the fucking the suddenness. Of how difficult the city this is delivering! We're kicking about ten days like everybody when they talk about a tough city. They always talk about New Yorker. I can make Derek and make it then I always found new. York because I grew up on the east coast I found it way easier. Because you could sort of escape the business when I came out here I kinda did know how to do that and there was just something about. The weather, not changing out here. If you were in a bad place in your career, you've got into that groundhog day like Holy Shit every day seventy two degrees smoggy every day every fucking day and I used to play that. What was it? The La Comedy Club went out and been Tara. No it was, it was as astor, my west of moral five off the one on one. WHO's the only place after while I could get stage time and they were going through a bad time, and there wasn't a lot of people coming out to the club. You know. They still had fucking all these old headshots up on the wall. Super fucking depressing. Sorry. I'm sure minds up there. But I I used to go to Newport they had a Newport beach. They had the laugh stop and there was one in Houston and That's where I met Kennison because it forbid him to go to the comedy workshop because of his kind of material. And as a result, when I met him, and started hanging out with him, before he came out here, he chained himself to a telephone pole, and put himself in a diaper like Jesus, and put a crown of thorns on his head with fake blood, dripping down his eyes, roll back, and they put him on the front page of the Houston, Chronicle Arts and leisure, and then everybody started talking about him because he'd been a you know the faith healing business, and then he moved out to La and I introduced to Mitzi. It's like I. was. As Fun I do. That's like a huge moment in. Stand up comedy you entry. Kennison glazed over and and I just didn't vote on anyway anyway long story. Three twins later. But. As Ba- triplets, but he. He I also introduced me Rodney Dangerfield and so we were on the same young comedians. Show that Rodney hosted and I did. Fifteen minutes did pretty well as we say. Accept people that go at crushed I don't know who they are I guess they're doing really well and then. And then Sam on did fifteen minutes, and then the the room. It was dangerfield's in New York. Final thing on HBO I had three and a half minutes Sam had fifteen. said the Rodney. WILL WHAT THE HELL IT GOES! I can't help it man. I Love Sam too much. There was no more time for anybody else. And he was he was right. Qassam was doing the whole bit. About can't feed the kid you know. Cameraman's got a sandwich. You know the starting to handle that on that. You must have been pissed though I was hurt that I was the guy that would get hurt, not pissed because I couldn't get posted right. Well scribe me do a D. I tell you. So much easier if you fox somebody over if they get mad if they get hurt, that's brilliant because you'll cherry them on man I hurt bugs. And Rodney FO- bad about it because he was a you know a neurotic Jewish and he told me I. was your fuck man. You're you're Ju. You're neurotic, never going to be happy. That's tell me when I was like twenty four I right to ron next. Have, a good set, man, Rodney like I wish I had gotten to meet him. He He was interesting guy. He loved pot smoked every day. said he didn't he didn't care. Who knew what he wanted on his tombstone You know that he loved it. He loved to help young Comedians such a hard time and he had. He went through hell, I mean he. And then he was Jack Roy. And, then a club owner gave the name Rodney Dangerfield. and. Cohen is such a fucking great name. Jacob Cohen Although Rodney Dangerfield now is Rodney. Dangerfield is immediate. Danger. How did he come up with that? The club owner did it came up with I. got it your this. That's his version and when I met him I was in the comedy store in La Hoya. and. He walked in and that weekend. Bruce found. A Funny Guy Friend of Mine and Robin was there all weekend. And I was like the Middle Guy around all of this insanity, and then Robin would a gone after me, and then a Rodney would go on after him. And roughly when I met him was in Lacoste cleanup from drugs. which was a spot near San Diego a drugs and booze, and every you did everything you know. And he comes in, and they're like Humana. Have MERV. Griffin show. You're fucked up I like it and he goes. You're funny. You're fucking funny man. That's all that matters. I I was supposed to clean up and go to the cost of, but I can't do it. No Booze. No COPEPOD, no pills I can't do it man. How Fuck, you must've said twelve people before he said it's no, no, no pot. No pills is one sentence. You would be a Hashtag. and. We became. Friends came to the comedy store condo where we stay. Did you guys stay in that? Young I stayed there. Letterman one time brought his dogs and there were fleas in there ever since. So they and they never, they never defleaed place. Mitzi didn't bring a service so there I the Itchen in the bed there. But Rodney would hang out and we became friends and we stayed friends A. Officiated! Strewn I was friends with him for. My? God, it's thirty, five, thirty, forty, some crazy. How many years how old? Past eighty four. Then he should he shouldn't have. To live in that lifelock that. Eighty. Four I can do eighty four if you can booze and partying until eighty four. Hundred you guys know you guys know comedian? Al Vinnie Mark. Now Mark I east coast guy he's got. He's open for Ronnie. He's got the beacon first of all. Do a dead on Rodney, and he's got some of the greatest stories about him. One of the ones I remember as far as like. Him Smoking Pot. Every day was when he would be working in Vegas Rodney had a one hitter. And Be Walking through the Casino, and he'd had like two or three open an axe, and when he wanted to take a hit, he'd be like all right. Boys get around yet around like a semi circle, and then he'd take a hit when he was done. It'd be like all right. Bring it up. Bring it up. Would just. Bring up. You know what you WANNA. See something cool. I have to go get. It would take me one second to get you WanNa see something cool. Just set up alone. Yes, to be my Dick this something. About Bob Sangha, walking away from camera in his house like. A reality show, let's see. The last thing, so people can look at Your House okay stare at my desk, okay? Wait there. Talked about me. I mean club back then. Okay, here we go, this His widow gave me. This box. This is his pot box. RV ON IT! said this inside of it. Is His cool shit, this is. Inside of it. Is Rodney's pot pie. No fucking way. These fucking pot. I also have here 'cause I've done these SCLERODERMA benefits and bill. You've been kind enough to do it. Bertram and ask you to because we try to help people. This is a fucking awesome picture. Wow, my God, join the problem with that picture is love. It's but otherwise. Who's WHO's on the far far right? Is that Tim Allen Tim Allen? Robin Jon Lovitz Rodney Dangerfield. WHO's to the left? That's you. Guy Over here is me. Turn your head to the site. Side that is just look at the. Left side. It's not GonNa work in a lineup, but I don't think that that's you. It is not you at me, I was like senator from rape teeth. That's what I got something better. You're ready. You're gonNA fucking love this. His wife gave us. We have never shown to anybody, but you guys asked about him, and I'm on the inner sanctum. I got a bottle and I talked about it in a in a special. It's a bottle of Rodney. Dangerfield Viagra. Wow Oh my God. It's Dangerfield and it says. It says Viagra. Talk about not giving a fuck. He didn't even go. Go I can alias. I know right. It's weird. GotTa have these pills? My not going up anymore. Okay and. Have you ever smoked weed out of that thought out of that bull? We does not agree with me, but I. if I'm going to do it. It's going to be out of that, but I'm gonNA proudly cleese's. Lease. Invite me to that. Okay. Maybe? That's what we'll do. The drive in screen. What Bill I'm sorry. I was GONNA say that. If you smoke out of that, some comedian meets native American like Peyote for. Something, wow and bill I was influenced by him for Dick Jokes. If you listened to him, he would just go. Do a tight fifty man just fifty. That's all you gotta do and his. It was all Dick Jokes it. Was You know it was a joke? Sometimes you'd hear. Did someone else say that? But it was a rodney joking shooting. Having sex at my age is like shooting pool. The rope in a that's. All all ditches, and then he'd committee of his said if he was having a good set, which is most of the time because he was just. Gun He'd go. I'm fucking funny all right? I would love that uncomfortable. That thing where? The thing, he would do with his mouth. He just looked like he always think he was getting interrogated. That's how we looked at life. He would tell me that to stay alive as a comedian and if you're Ju- like that's how we looked at life, he would be like getting out of Germany during World War. Two is you too tight six minutes for the guard at the border. And if you're funny, you get out of Germany. If, you do a good six minutes takes men sick, but he gave me three on the special. WHAT THE FUCK! But I was close with him, and he was a big influence as as was Richard. Fuck it at the store. I was like twenty two and. Hanging out with Richard in the ended up doing a movie with him and he was. Crazy. The Toy critical condition. Where he's in the, he's in a gown. He's going like this. He's he's a fake doctor. A convict escape and he pretends he's a doctor, and it had great actors in. It had Rachel ticket and Joe Montana and Ruben Ruben Babe's blades. Who is almost a president of Panama and Randall Tex Cobb, and all these weird eclectic wonderful people and that's has a great imdb. Does. Good movies raising Arizona, wasn't he and that oh? He was a way. Does I knew that is? Yeah? He was also in. Those Chuck Norris Movies about getting the POW's back. They. He's a good actor I literally called Michigan Action, mission and action one two three of something like that. Yeah, and obviously the nicest guy like fucking nights so nice. You know I I saw last night late night. That was on. That is a perfect movie for what it is. What about Bob? A, what about Bob is great fucking movies? The way. Bill Murray and Richard Dreyfuss play off each other in that movie is just it's. It's genius, and there's not an ounce of fat on it. I was totally engaged. And old man I started dozing off to the NFL. I fell asleep at three minutes, and like it's over any says because it's so fucking tight. We every time we eat. Apparently do what Bob does when he eats, he's like M-. and my daughter will start doing it with me is. Anytime a joke you can hear a joke in a movie or in stand up, and then it plug into your life, and you can just share it with your family, and it'd be like now. You're running joke. That's one fucking I love that Shit. That movie is interesting because it draws you in in a way that kind of analyzed this does in its its own way years later, but then the third act or one about Bob goes way over the top 'cause, the mania and then arose of Bill Murray is like. Ten Eleven, but it really works is some. Really unusual that it works at it's that crazy it it's. One of my favorite comedies. Yeah, besides besides the the Pete Davidson movie that I have yet to see. I tried they'd sent me as of an email bill and there were like. Hey, if you'd like to watch this screen watch like to watch a movie, Judd appetite. Pete would like you to watch it and I was like great i. want to send a hundred fucking emails trying to get to get screener. That is the one movie my wife is dying the fucking see. Mine to whatever they did with that trailer, it's been crushing and everybody seems to be wanting to watch it so. It's you know there's also the family trailer is a lot of bill. Burr on June twelfth, and then the wealthiest dries up. Not I. Don't have anything after that Oh things. Don't hit billy boys going back to his parents house. Sure. That ain't happening you. You're super craze. Elite built talking about the movie for a little bit. I'd love to hear you talking about. I, it's. I've seen it. It's great I think it's might be judged. Best Work and I had a massive panic attack before I didn't. Why? I. I have a tendency to find look too far down the fucking road. I get overwhelmed. You know I had this big part. You know there was. A bunch of stuff in the in the role that ad never done before, so it was outside my comfort zone. I was leaving La and where I live and all of my shit. And, now I'm not going to see my Ba- fortunately. They came along, but you know the deal. You still working twelve fourteen hour days so. I had that comedian like I. She just do stand up. fucking do my Dick. Jokes. I get my money and then go home and I just thought could sit down. that. Why am I trying to do this? Every time I made one of these and then fucking Aquaman port seven comes out berries whatever movie I was in. And I was just away from this massive panic attack. and. You know. My friends and my wife talked me up the fucking legend all right and then went down to the first day. I had a good time. I didn't get fired and then it just became like this great hang. I, just had fun and all the firefighters and actors. We all bonded just breaking balls. Before we went on during the scenes after. And then Pete Davidson just sort of set the tone where you know he was there. I left last and if he could shoot you out and get you out of there. He would do it. which is really unprecedented behavior by some number one on the call sheet? Because usually you know, they do all their coverage. And the the lead jumps in their sub and fucking leaves, and then everybody else is hanging out and he was just. He was awesome. Because of his life he has so much wisdom at such a young age because of the hardship, and you're playing is I. Mean What your plan is. Dad, man, that's. fucking jerk off. I'm playing. The distinct Steve Buscemi is dead. Now it's Shannon. Oh he told me was skimming. Your House. Right now I'd take one of your awards away from Utah. I Love I love that that moment is the my favorite moment. Burgas bills a serious that he's playing Daddy. His Dad in the movie now. That's the whole point, not as daddy's fucking his mom. See who told me were. I'M NOT GONNA. Tell you somebody that we both know. I was misinformed. Yeah, well, I mean it's a answer. Quick trailer. How how would you know I? I knew I well. You know the story is that his dad dies on Lebanon, and then you see him with him. It would be really that's also now. What happens real? I thought it was based on his life. It is, but they took nine eleven aspect out of it because that will spoiler alert. I mean no, it's. Actually talked about it in interview, so I'm not, it's. They took that element out of it, so we could sort of avoid hatfields and mccoys. Of. George Bush will have to Bill Clinton do this red tie blue. Taya's screaming and fucking Yellen and all of that Shit, so they just sort of like. You know I think they just WanNa made it something that you know you can go in and watch in in. experienced the story where I think like nine eleven when something that were everybody experienced number. He has some sort of. Sad emotion connected to I think it would have been a little too heavy was kind of brilliant moves to take it outside of that I think it's so funny. The way I heard it is that his dad did on nine eleven in the movie, and that you and him bonded and then find Bin Laden. But I guess that's not what happens. That is what happens, and you just ruined the second act. A truth is I. Heard Bill that you play in Latin in the movie. That's not true, but when we meet Bin Laden, we actually hit it off. So becomes this weird thing. We started playing cards and afterwards. We know that we have to kill him. And you know. It's one of those gainful like am I gonNa get past. The ominous country in your in that country. Are we going to get down to the human thing and? I hate to say. We chose Patriots as. A would. What's what's what's John Appetite like as as a director as he like super great job bill, or is he? One of those guys like looking for moving on that means we got it. I I never had said look. If we're moving on, we got it. How fucking Needier you onset? Somebody said that to you. Right there. That's lever moving on the cameras. We've given up on you. Know. He was he was great and he never GonNa get you moving on moving on. It's costing US money. act. Well loop him I did I did have a show runner. One time on a pilot come to be at like two in the morning. Elliott Gould told me I should ad Lib Right, and so I add lived at two in the morning. It goes playing blind guy's got. He's blind with a dog, and he's standing behind me and and we can't get this line and Elliott Gould just goes. I'd ad-lib fiery you and so I do an ad Lib out, and everyone laughs all the executives still there too in the fucking morning. COMES GREAT, great great! We're going to do it one more time and then leans migos, your fucking me in the asshole right now and walks away and Elliott Gould. Still playing the blind guy goes sorry. I have a civilised story. We. What is it there Melissa Story I fucking? I was doing a movie and the scene wasn't working. In the lead was going. This doesn't make any sense. My character wouldn't be fucking standing. And if he touched me, I would fuck it. Take my gun up about doing that issue. So this tension. Because they know they, Kiki can't just fucking rewrite the scene. It was pretty intense fucking thing. So. Anyway the leads he starts Improv. And he's talking to me, saying Shit that isn't on the scripts on like I. Guess we're in Providence. So we go back to one and action and I come in and start in. The whole fucking thing falls apart. And all of a sudden hatchet man, the fucking big time produce. Iowa let's try one more. And then. He slowly just got right in my grill. And barely above a whisper, he just got my face with fucking. Don't you don't fucking in Providence Bucket? You say what the fuck is on the fucking Patriot the fuck. You think you are just. Like fifty bucks in my face. And I was just sitting there going like I was kind of smiling at first thinking, he was joking. And he was A. Then you think you'd like? Why didn't she yell at the other guy? He was also improved. He's a big star right long story short. My head I'm like what the fuck I hear. I'm a comedian. I don't need this shit. Nobody's yells. I haven't let anybody yell at me like that. Since my dad way back in the day. Dude I was up to like three in the morning. Thinking about this shit, all the shit that I wanted to say and I knew I couldn't say anything. Because, he was the powerful guy, and he was going to tell the story, and that was going to be true, so I didn't say anything. And it ended up being a great thing because that guy ended up hooking me up just straight up hooking me up with the partner movie like a couple of years later, and I got to know him, and we hit it off, and he was one of the coolest funniest fucking guys ever. It was just a bad day on set. And I was in his sights, and I did that little thing, and he fucking took his day out on me. But you know what I kept. My mouth shut. They took it like a man. Adam. Now, I love the guy that's fucking. Hilarious is now I? Love the well when you go to that shit together. It's an emotional thing. It's like you. You're actually You don't hate me. You're really good actor. Really good and I mike bide our mutual friend. Directed you in black or white with 'em, you played kosters, brother and if people haven't seen that, you see that movie bill I mean. I did I fucking love that movie I. Love That Movie I. Forgot Bill was in it. Bill Bill Creeps up in every fucking movie I'm was talking about a movie I go. Do you ever see that movie about Gary Hart? And he goes I was fucking it? That's the movie you lived in. Disappeared the character that you don't even know it's me once you once you put a little mustache. Ooh, where where did bill up? Did you love? Boston accents still all up in the mix. 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Real well, it's it's Monday it aired. Aired decode aired. Really call it. It's up. What are you saying? Least have loaded? It's a loaded. It's ejaculated into people's faces and ears and. Bill the of it. Is He rips me a new one? Because you? Basically I know you gotta do a spot Bor but bill basically told me what my act was. He says your act is nothing more. You WanNa. Say it or can I save bill? You want me to say it. You know I was just joking I love you. I didn't take a minute Bob Bob did I hurt you. Know I, love you fucking. Say That when people when you make fun of me, it makes me feel like you love me. That's how fucking sick I am mentally. But you said I love you so much I hate you same here. I love you so I. Hate you so much right now. He said my act is nothing more than all the lines on full house. They wouldn't let me say and I take those lines in I say fuck around him. He said that's all my act is. And I've thought about it. 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A car to policy gene will compare your. Your home and auto policies across different insurance and even mix and match to find you savings. They saved a customers on average of one, thousand, one, hundred and twenty seven dollars per year. Just doing that I'll tell you. That's a Lotta manscaping products. You could buy with eleven hundred twenty seven dollars, so if you'd like to put a little cash back in your pocket right now. See how much you can say by re shopping your home insurance rate at policy genius Dot Com. Yeah, you shouldn't give that accent I did love that. fucking movie I really love that same building. You love making it. which will black or white or black or white? We Know Pete. Davidson thing was a love fest Yeah, no, that was a That was another one where it was there was. Kevin Costner Octavia Spencer was a lot of by. There was a lot of season. Slash winning people that I was doing scenes with some incredible character actors and stuff like that, so yeah I had. I was pretty. I was pretty green at that point so I learned a lot of things. Sense then where I used to be really just like this is. And we're doing this and I would know all the lines, and then and now I'm doing this. I wasn't looking at how they all connected. Park of this person that I was playing I. Tried to learn how to do that a little bit more, but it doesn't show in your new role work, but the thing about black or white. Is You were so maybe that inexperience made you so vulnerable to be able to play his brother and his lawyer I mean it was just something really special and Kevin known a long time haven't seen him in a long time, but he's really is a really good guy. I wasn't his brother. W were no, and you weren't Davidson's father. Do enjoy my acting performances, but they never quite understand. Who? You are related to whoever I'm talking to, so they just see you know you're good, but they don't know. You're so out of character that they don't know who you're playing. Wait somebody recently. One of the guys over Barstool, sports. He fucking Toby Watch. The movie in loved it and then asked Hey, did you do this in the movie? I go yeah. I thought you watch is I can't remember. So it's either something I'm doing our everybody with the cell phones up to their heads for ten years before he got the hands, free devices made no I went to a screening. Mike invited me of a rough rougher cut of it and neo was there I was with with your wife. And me. Fit into. I was with your wife. Kevin Costner like I wanted I feel like I know him. I feel like A. Bull Durham in fucking tin, Cup or to my favorite movies that define who I am dude and field of dreams. Come on. Yeah, at dances with wolves for fuck sake I made. I. I hate to do this, but I did the groundlings with him before right after before American Flyer came out, which is one of his first big ones that was got him noticed, and he'd been cut out of the big chill. He was the corpse in the big deal. The other one FANDANGO. Yeah, sorry. I always interrupted story finish story. I always do, but we did the groundlings together. And, we did Improv workshop with Barbi. Benton hefner's. Lady for a while. And? And every situation they would was such a good actor and he had to deal with the moment so much that did you the exercise? We hand someone a ball imaginary ball, and you'll receive it and you whatever energy you're getting from the other actor. You're taking the ball, and then you give it to the other person. Someone comes at him and gives him this ball, imaginary ball and the energy from this other Acuras keystone cops and Kevin does holds the ball. And he doesn't know what to do with it, he can't. He doesn't know what he was getting. This guy, Gaza lunatic, and then he finally disliked disfie- was literally four minutes. Grease is holding the all everybody's other guy I mean and I'm like you're amazing. You're so good, and then we made out and got a hotel. Did! You have drinks with him bill? Went bow fishing. What We went both fishing. After we rat went out and I got a fishing license. and. I went out with him and like three or four other people. We had a blast I dismember those guys, those Cajun dudes. We've fishing at night in flashing light on the wanted to like a Darah Darah. and. Let the thing go. Then, we got some fish ate. It was delicious. In yeah, he was like a yet. A Guy's guy, definitely a guy's guy in Really you know I think he has seven kids, so we definitely had that fatherly vibe or Cooking kids. Yeah, I have many. Kids, so he has like yeah. He's a guy's guy outdoorsman hunter father. From the very beginning when I knew him when I was close to them, the Kinda guy he was from the very beginning, always knew what he wanted to do very convicted what he wanted to do. Period it was, it was going to do it his way, and that is how he does what he does with passion and I had just gotten a show in new. York on CBS, and we stayed friends for awhile after the groundlings, so he did the untouchables. And so he calls and says I WANNA take you to the premier. And he took his wife at the time, the mom of some of his kids and my wife at the time the mom. My kids and he picked us up at our partner New York in a limo. And he comes in to the premiere. Any puts his arm around me and introduces me to diploma and Deniro, and here I am you know in nineteen, Eighty, seven on CBS morning program, and he's The star like definable movie. Not just for his career but period. And such a loyal guy, such a such a good never forget that kind of. Guys Guy Friendship Loyal Guy. He's an interesting type of movie star because he isn't technically an action star like you think when you think male movie stars, you think like Schwarzenegger. And and stallone, and like those guys, Bruce Willis he's like an emotional, but not a ROM com. He's like an emotional movie like almost like a a sports. Without being an like you know a sports movie star. It's like the love of baseball I mean they kept telling. Don't make another baseball movie and he's like Fuck It's the script that matters, and it's the story, and then he's also a romance star because he's a good looking guy, so. It, probably bill's going to go through I. Think after this Davidson. He's GonNa. Get A lot. You'd be bill. You would be amazing, action, Star. White Whale! What's your? What's your movie? You WanNa, do is it action is it Straits Stan comedy like meaning like like slapstick comedy. Tommy boy. If the if the studio said You could make any movie you want your bill. We're we'RE GONNA put one hundred million behind it. What's the movie you make? What. Well. Ready or next when I just roll with Ben Tesla. Now I kind of like I like to comedies at I like doing dramas so anytime. There's a movie that has both which is why our our TV shows breaking bad breaking Goodfellas, two of the great dark comedies, I. Happen so recently. The movie that I saw the last couple of years. That I absolutely fucking loved. that had comedy and drama in it was. The Nice guys! That had. Gosling and My God I was on the treadmill the other day and my God Oh, my God, who Schemer Ryan Gosling by the way I'm on the treadmill and I see nice guys like what the fuck is. This I don't know anything about it. Turn on Ryan Gosling. It, the very beginning and he was like. Crying laughing I ended up recording the movie and I'm like this movie is. Russell Crowe the next one I. Thought Your father. Two minutes I haven't seen the whole thing though both of their performances in that movie and then the guy who plays the bad guy. who gets the blue paint. Ruin it for people. You have to see that movie and then the stuff that Ryan Gosling does. He's such a student of comedy. Bentley. A hundred percent. To like Avenue Castillo routine where he can't talk and he's doing that this thing. Physical comedy that he does, he knows everything about comedy. And then the way he can throw away a line or like I was blown away and then Russell Crowe is just so like. He talk about Guys Guy I. That's one of my favorite performances Russell Crowe's ever done. And I loved his leather jacket. Was this shit so? If I could be in fucking movies like that that have like that are funniest hell, but there's also like you know there was. The stakes are really high. There was a lot of drama like those are the perfect. Perfect movies. You'll do it do it. Here's your question if they said they could go. To remake one movie. They're like we WANNA. Do a remake any remake two star in it. What movie do you want to remake? Is this my question yeah you star in. The Passion. Because I want to be beaten and I I have a complex that I want to help everybody. Was a great answer I'm. Not GonNa. Say That al.. I'll yeah, yeah, but fist scare me in all all forms, no matter how they are. We're whatever position they're in crying game. Oh! That'd be so cool I WANNA be revealed. Yet kiss of the spider woman. That's what I WANNA do. Maybe maybe deliverance, but you run it backwards deliverance. Just This the one scene. Teeth come out and you hear that sound. I don't know about remakes. I mean I have Jimmy Stewart Complex. You know, but all the great stuff he did that'd be. Jimmy Stewart after talking about suck at some rednecks deck in the fucking woods. I didn't say that. Right in the sound, Effects Alvin, sorry. Fact that can be applied to anything. Maybe the guy stepped in something. To be a future fucking Supreme Court justice I'd stepped all your past in you. I think you should do like a more evolved forty-eight hours type of thing and just blow the screen up like Eddie did with with some actor that you just think is the shit. You know some great. Actor. Nick Nolte. Bills Nick Nolte, I'll be but what if he's wrong together bill. You guys should do it together, and you should try it at the drive in. The Workshop. I would like any movie that you do. Wait wait. Your character gets cool old car. Fletch I'm I'm in on that I would? I would love to remake fletch like flinches, one of my favorite movies ever, but it stinks that Chevy Chase isn't. A nice person ruin hates him. Well I, directed him in dirty work. So, he was really easy to work with, and we only had him for a week. We also had Chris Farley for week. That that's that was the sweetest of all people but Chevy was nice until I showed him a a clip until shown screening in New York of the film in it left out one bit that he did. He was not happy about that, but I didn't have any trouble with them, but I've heard that also. We I WANNA. Talk about norm. Bob I know. I know that you love Norman I fucking love norm. I think norms. Maybe one of the an American treasure. He is one of these people alive I think advertising. and. We are talking about possibly trying to do a sequel, and we got some permission of the big Jesus, but we're not there yet, but with at you both have to be ended if we do it, so that's all there is to it 'cause. 'cause funniest people. We need norm. Norm is regarded by most funny people to be one of the funnier people alive. And we've had some real interesting shit happened together. It's A. Dirty work, so it's a year with McDonald. And, it's like entertainment. Tonight was there while I was directing it and it for the cameras. He goes a whispering in his ear stuff giving him some notes goes. Why listen to the DAD from full house? I might take direction from the video guy. He just states the obvious as loud as he can. and. He also knows the secret of quiet when you get real quiet how you draw people in, and then he just. Instruction of things as amazing Oh. He's the best opening joke I thought when he hosted SNL. After he got fired, and then they ended up bringing them back. Because, yes. I got five for this show for not being funny enough so now hosting it so evidently either. I gotTa Lot. Funnier this. You have sex. Open. At my roast. He says sagging I can't I can't rose to. You're my friend. That's a real good impression. It's just it's me with a slight less base. And I go. Just do it in curse a little bit I. Don't want to curse. I'm GonNa read jokes from forties. Joke Book. normal I don't know so he sits there, and while everyone else is roasting meat. He's reading the sports section. That's what he did. His little Andy Kaufman weird off the rails kind of thing, and then he gets up there, and he does a fifteen minutes set. It gets cut down to about I. Don't know seven or eight or nine minutes words really amazing, but there was silence in the room because he just like Johnny Carson was just reading cards these old jokes and then one point he went. You got a face like a flower, a cauliflower. No laugh because I'm saying fucking dog face. Okay and I'm gone. Yeah that any gets a huge laugh. And then he started to curse a little bit, and then he got emotional, because we're friends and he started saying I love you I. Don't like to make fun of by friends and distinct the world. Then we man hugged and made love. I saw that I saw that that roast me derosa loved it. Thanks so is. It called me because you've got to see McDonald. He's just doing jokes from like sixty years ago in stays committed to it. That's the brilliance of him. His last his special on Netflix was amazing, and he wrote a book. That's amazing. I mean he's. He's very prolific. Funny. He's always about the joke like everything is about like I love comics. Were you? It almost seems like he's never turning it off like it's always. There's always a joke. He we were going to do. My special came out. Hey, big boy, you know. NETFLIX's all. My special came out. Belches? When I was GONNA do. Work Show at the store and Norman spayed we're GONNA. Do it. Everyone's going to do it. Norman spayed. We're GONNA come by, and then obviously now the pandemic it and and we and so the day my special dropped its stay at home orders. no-one's leaving. So. The morning of the of St Patty's Day was which is everyone. Stay at home and that's the day we're going to do the concept work door show. I get a text from norm or DM from norm. Show Salon today. He ended up doing. The brawling to himself. You know like the. Last night. I watched that documentary. It's on who that's about. The Dana Carvey show. You guys watch that. No, I have to because I kinda walking unbelievable level of guys. Were writing and acting on that show, yeah, and the sketches that they did and then the first sketch that they did to kick the show off. It was just like Chapelle show where it was like. This is our mission statement and we're not backing down. It was one of the it was such. An inspirational thing to watch. Resent that the one with nipples. The nipples Clinton had. Nipples was breastfeeding than added Duck's ass, and it just kept going and going and going, and was breastfeeding head real milk, coming out of office will licking it. This was on prime time right after Tim Allen Show on ABC never they just. A moment where they were going to do it on HBO and like now now now now you WANNA be 'cause. He was so big. They put in that place and just watching the balls that Dana Carvey had just. Just. That old school fucking fabulous is funny in this is what we WANNA do in smile and Louis C. K., and all of these guys that were on a Steve Carell Stephen Co bear. It's just It was like they had the Mount Rushmore of fucking. Comedy Writers and performers in ninety percent of America myself included I. DON'T WANNA fuck. I was missed. It was only like eight episodes. It's sixt at, and he's of the most talented. A! At this moment he should just be celebrated I'm looking forward to him doing somethin'. Shows he, so he's in anomaly. fucking like it all worked out because 'cause con snatched Joe didn't like. Like do what they thought it was going to do. He got to see kids growing up because that is the trade off that. To say. Matt Stroke. I know I. Know But I get bummed when you hear stories like. This sounds silly, but I'm sure sure sure someone can understand that, but like when you hear stuff like Rick Moranis boss his wife, and then he raised his kids you, that's great, and then you go but I also loved him in movies. You know like I wanted I still want to see him work. I WANNA see at work. I don't WanNa see. I don't want to lose the artist I still you know what I mean. I was directing summit a couple of years ago and I made an offer to rick. and. I heard back from his attorney. And really polite. And it was verbatim. wrote to me. That he just doesn't WanNA. Do it anymore, but he is. He was so honored and he said he he loved my work, and he wanted to the nice get outta in. Not Do this thing, but it just. It meant a lot to me. 'cause he's another one person. That's just so fucking funny. fucking residents, which is at first movie he did that the Canadian wanted, and they will play in hot rate strange brew with David Thomas. Increase he was in the crease. Those guy slammed into and those were SETV characters. That was a sketch on SETV again Dave Thomas. He's in little shop of horrors. He's like I. You can't picture anyone and it's a musical rights. As some people just get turned off to right away, but he just pulls you in Sioux. Besides it's a great musical. If you like them, some people don't but. He still lovable and ghostbusters. He's just so so lovable so funny as I feel when you say Bert. It selfish to to love someone's work so much and go I know. You've had a hard time, but please don't stop you know. Because you, we funny people are so many didn't stop. He kept he kept doing Dana. Carvey kept doing up. By Rick, Moranis let's talk about Danny Dana out there and is doing it, but He's he's a real one. Lover. What was the movie he did with Danny Glover where he? It's the silliest movie. That's Martin Short. It's pure luck on remind. Martin Sheriff Martin Short a kid talk money Andrew Lloyd fucking gave. You for a guy sitting, in Malibu, with the fucking little son had on your pretty quickly and give him a break. I thought. He should've kept doing. Stand up by need more contents. And Know You lost your wife. Please make me happy. Because the name of that movie, and he just Talia like Oh there you go. Look Good Martin shorts been through, and he's one of the funniest people alive and he hasn't stopped. He's not going to stop. So I didn't know he had been through something. I don't WanNa. Hear it though I. Don't WanNa. Hear the tragedy. It's the same as Rick Moranis. Rather. You. Say about those guys. I've had two beers. I shouldn't say a fucking thing. Say You, see. Interesting thought there. Seems real interested you like you know what good guys they are. When they lose their wives, and then they go stop work I'M GONNA raise my family I'M GONNA settle down around lost my wife. It'd be like okay. We're moving to Austin. Getting a new white, he's going to be younger hotter faster quicker. She's not going to think much like I just like I'll be on the road nonstop. The girls are going to boarding school. I'M GONNA fucking. Party my Dick off like those those guys do that, and then you're like well great guys they are. Our recommend your wife. Not Watch this episode. I can't wait till lose my wife and I get to partied. Go to Austin. I'm going to be so hammered and so many violent I've. Never, heard from Bard. We we one time. were out on a date, and we were talking about what we would do if the person died today like where what would you do? He was like I'd want to. I'd want you start over. I'd want you to keep moving your life I go. I will I will. He was like wait. What made you want me to keep living my life? Not at all like I want I. Want like it's different. I'm bigger. I want you to really like. Hold down the vigil for a few years. You know like ten years and then you know. Me Ally. Keep the memory of me a lot. I don't have happiness yourself make a documentary about me. Documentary about me. A back to the Dana carvey documentary that you saw on Hulu of wes. What what's interesting about it, too? They show the making of as you're behind the scenes footage got all of that stuff, and then they have stuff that didn't air. And then they have all the cast members talking about it and they they had like one of the great to. They had one of the network executives. was like what the fuck you guys doing. He was explaining his position, which was really great. And just the overall. Like just the amount of talent that was in that room that it didn't connect in that they didn't stop doing what they were doing. And they went out on their own terms, and whenever you student minds me of like when Steve? Raven doubled trouble in the Monterey Jazz festival and they got booed. And Steve he could see was affecting them, but every song. When he went to play he, he was just tearing into everything and they just they just still did their shit. Is something about that that it's it's. It's almost. It's more inspiring than watching. Great people do something. The general public likes to watch somebody doing when you're doing that is actually good, and nobody's getting it right you still. Stay on that track and you'RE GONNA. fucking the momentum Dana Carvey had then where there was talks to him taking over letterman spot after he went over to CBS. They. Groom this guy like he was just company man, and he was just like all right, I'll do fucking sketch. Show up, and just because it's on ABC units on at nine thirty. I'm going to do exactly what I want to do. and. It was just an smuggle. Was You blew me away? The whole thing was just an incredible I. Don't WanNa. Ruin it. Just just check it out if the chance muggles Bryant. Yeah. That definitely comes across and he could see it really. It's still hurt them. It seen that he felt that he led Dana. Down is how we took a date. It's like no, it's fine. You know we did what we wanted to do. It's impossible not to love Dana. Carvey it's it's actually impossible, and and if you hang out with them. Is just. We won't talk for a while, but we've known each other since before. We got a job I auditioned for us in L. E. addition. He got it. I didn't I thought I'd never work again I didn't. But we would, we would go to dinner. We were like twenty, four, twenty five, and we would go with our wives and we would say. Why aren't we making? We both did music in our acts, and and he did impressions that I did my my weird, but ever the fuck I did and we was your both so talented house gone and we commiserate. But he was beautiful about ms all the shit that he's gone through his life. He's just a very positive person, so we'll talk every once in a while for a couple of hours like a year or two ago by them, it'll be okay. Call me back and it's like this is what it's turned into for. You know the cats have with your friends. It's a podcast. You don't go. Hey, let's have a drink will face time. That's not that often, but with carvey it's a three hour phone call, and I, it's always special. He's just. Adam Levin. I love it. Doesn't get the respect that he should get from like like our kids know. Like. My kids will know certain certain guys from SNL like you know the Will Ferrell's and whatnot, but man. That guy was funny as fucking Shit like is one of the greats whether he will he will. It's not done. You know he's. He's about my age. A little younger I think I'm sixty four fuck? Would you guys or sixty four in your careers taken off, and you left your wives and all kinds of fun shit happens can be great, but Bill will have his action movie would serious drama and not care about his kids anymore. You're sixty four union looking great. Yeah, that's because I aware vice I. Wear Clamp on my Dick like you would. It holds in all my youth. You know what you would like jumpstart. I'M GONNA. Continue Jumper cables that think that's I always have that on my Dick so when you see me on stage, look, you'll see the ended tation and then wire coming out of the bottom of my pants leg hooked up to a battery. GUYS STILL ON. But. Rodney was fifty eight. When he got in Caddyshack, he I loved Asteroids Gene. Hackman was fifty four before he got his first movie. That's the real deal and Brian Dennehy. Who just lost he? He wasn't where he was the acting, but he wasn't like the third lead in everything then fifteen years, he was in everything I talked to somebody years ago the when? When he was at his peak and Tony Damnit he's an everything You didn't have a part till he was in his. Fifties until things started to open forum so. I, can forest guys like. Like Dana Carvey because. I just feel like guys have his level of talent. Don't need to campaign nor give a shit. About that pecking order stuff I mean everybody wants to be respected whatever but I. I also feel that like. People that are are good, but sort of. Good just campaign for the shed there on the red carpet, tweeting that just really, and then they sort of become when they talk about the whole the whole. Whatever the pecking order they move up all of these lots in like the draft, and then he's like this Tom. Brady guy that goes goes goes drops down I just I've always found that. This is weird thing that people who are really at his level of talent. Don't give a shit. About. That playing that old game to be what they're doing, the top whatever list of Blah Blah Blah. Do you WanNa, do the interview for that. Say I feel like they just don't give a shit about that, and then the fuck can. Say Hats But The okay comics or whatever sort of people that learn how to work the stage, and they walk around at market like a lion. 'cause they've watched you do it because they watch you know prior Carlin Everybody Chapelle Rock. You know start moving. Don't just stand there. I mean Chris Rock mid used to stand at the Mike when when I used to bring them up on stage at the comedy store he was, the throttle was not opened yet. You know he's talked on quieter and Eddie would bring them in and thank. What are you writing the book? You'll like the forest gump. Every fucking major comic of the last four years you like. A distant to admit. But I was suffering I'd have a job. I was eight years at the comedy store or hosting. You're doing that again. You're incorrect bill it is about. But you were great the lawyer in black or white you really were. And I don't think you're getting the credit and you're good. Beat Davidson's Dad Actually same sex couple if you take the time to watch. The movie. Are you twins? That'd be hot. Yeah they do each other and incestuous kind of way because. We. Off Happen to us when you've got to be connected. That's weird because we both were there when it happened, but we've still never talked about. Your connected so that you're facing in different directions, so yes, reveal is they see each other for the first time when they are separated. and. They're not attracted to each other. That! You've presented that burt like yes, I've seen this story line thousand times. What was? Is you're giving bill what he wants because there's the drama and the comedy. My daughter just brought me a beer. Right raised right, thank you. Allah, or that's the game of the family. Let's you know. Let's let dad get drunk. Having pass out so then we can all fucking chill out and enjoy. A. Man, all, right, that's those are the three sales in the old man's. That means this podcast. It's reached attending I don't. Where it's going on his third beer all right well, that concludes the podcast but I want to tell you. It's been so much fun to finally see the inside of your house, which used to be the nickname ass which you showed me when I first started comedy when I hope that it used to be a full. How over me? Always. Will over pay a bill bill. You can't be overpaid now. Because you're such high rent, you get you get a big check bill. You're you sell out places in foreign lands. In goes right to the wife. Whatever doesn't go to. The government goes to the wife well for whites gonNA. Get Nia deserves it. She's the best I can. You had a fun time hanging out with your wedding now, but Kelly and I just love her, and we'd like to get together with you guys. Once all this insanity stops. It'd be really nice one day. You don't want conveniently. Throw my back out. Right. Then you could just have dinner with her 'cause I. Know that's what you want. If your back is out I'm coming to your house. Just wanted to be you and me because you're incapacitated. That's how I want you and then cruising comes back. That's the movie I remake with you. Play a test dummy. Sagging everybody brother. Love burdens I'm GonNa, be on an episode of it. It's it's called. The BOB SAG it. in your face man ain't taking no shit because he's talented. Lang it is, that's the name of it. It's got Bob Saggy. moving on up to the site nuts. Bob Seconds here for you. and. What Yawn at Bert I'd love to. I'd love to Bob Bank I'd love to I. Want You drunk I want your kid get y'all liquor up. We're working on that today. And Bill you stop smoking cigars. You're not smoking them, no more. I smoke one every couple of months. Okay, we'll ridiculous. When it's like a special occasion. I can do it. How about when you throw your back out over your place? Can we smoke afterward? Spoke Out Rodney's pipe. Smoke Ronnie's, pipe was. Think. Let's say yes. That's one hundred percent. I love you, guys. You guys are so. Really honored and happy I was on with you guys today. It was a really nice way to spend my afternoon for Real I. Don't think it was an ounce of sincerity and that this is what the? Suck you. Making you're listening to the bill? pod! Outright Robert I love you, brother. Break guys thanks. I love you too and burdock. Grants in the mail.

Bill Bill La Bob Rodney Dangerfield Rodney full House Pete Davidson Bob I Oklahoma bill Burr Hollywood Mr Bob Sang Robin Jon Lovitz New York Gilligan Canada Manscaping Georgia Dick
Wednesday, March 13: Jay Leno, Colton Underwood and Cassie Randolph

The View

38:06 min | 1 year ago

Wednesday, March 13: Jay Leno, Colton Underwood and Cassie Randolph

"Are you hiring with indeed you can post job in minutes set up screener questions than zero in on your shortlist of qualified candidates using an online dashboard get started today at indeed dot com slash ABC. That's indeed dot com slash ABC. Brought to you by the new Capital One saver card earned four percent cashback on dining and entertainment two percent at grocery stores and one percent on all other purchases. Now when you go out you cash in what's in your wallet? Subscribe now to our podcast to get hot topics delivered every afternoon and while you're at it rate us in labor review. Deign hot topics coming up because the view is live big scam on campus celebrities and the rich and powerful charged in a twenty five million dollar college bribery scandal to lie and buy their kids way into the best schools in America and legendary funny man and former tonight show host Jay Leno on how Trump change late night comedy. I know words, I had the best words and if he never like another spin in the host seeds, mud after the wild bachelor finale that broke all the rules. Colton and Cassie are here live and the co-hosts are putting them in the hot seat. When this version comes here to give him a dose of a little psycho therapy. Hot topics are in the house whip Whoopie. Oh, huntsmen joy Behar sunny, hostage, Meghan, McCain and Ana Navarro. Now, let's get things started. Everybody. Welcome to view. I came out like way earlier than ever you're Alex giant cap but coming. The bad for their anti Leno and Jay Leno. Yeah. So so what are these getting better every day? And we'll be back soon. I want you all to be a member. I hope he gets better because I have a lasagna and my freezer just waiting for you. That was Joe she loves you. So did you wonder why your kid can can't get into an Ivy league school, even though they have straight A's greats SAT scores Deva think about that? Well, this could have something to do with it college counseling service lead a Williams singer was just arrested as the ringleader of the biggest college admission scam. Ever he allegedly helped the rich and powerful including actresses like, Felicity Huffman and Laurie Lachlan get their kids into Ivy league schools through bribes cheating on entrance exams. Faking disabilities and doctoring photos of kids playing sports now everyone is shocked by this shocked, but I made us apprised. I'm not that surprised that they caught them. That's all isn't the sad part though. Like when this broke yesterday. I was like shocking like this is what I think we all knew what's going on. I'm just thrilled with his spotlight is being put on it. Because if this one operation, but it does. You wonder how many others there are? And how many other parents are paying off for their kids to get it through sports or or someone taking their their exams for them or whatever it is. I do want to mention that William H Macy. Felicity, husbands husband is not charged in this. But what was also interesting is. It wasn't just the parents. They were nine coaches at elite schools to SAT and ACT exam administrators one exam. Proctor a college administrator. So it expands beyond just the parents. They have to work with the schools to get paid in return in some way. Which also makes it even worse. I was shocked. I was shocked to learn that I could have gone to my parents. I had enough money. I could have gone through school pretending. I was a gymnast. But Corbett, listen, you know, I was a fellow at Harvard at the institute of politics few years ago. Not that I was a student even in my parents had had half a million bucks. They still wouldn't have man. But there are so many black and Brown kids and poor white kids in these schools who are told and made to feel like they don't belong. There are people who go against affirmative action. They have filed lawsuits have said that rich white people are getting, you know, poor them are getting discriminated, and dammit to know that they are gaming the system this way, and that the ones that don't belong there and don't deserve to be there and are paying to be there are these kids not those kids just angered me. I know it. You know, that's how I feel too. We were texting each other. And for me, I thought you know, how mediocre must you be? If you have to game a system that disproportionately advantages you anyway, I mean, that's how I was. You know, that's a good one. You must really mediocre here. You have to game that system all the advantages of that system anyway. But then a wind them to go to just any school. Yeah. They want them to go to that school. And I think what was also shocking to me what you're talking about by advantages are private schools counselors tutors. You say yours, hey for the best anyway. And I also thought we know that people like Jared Kushner's family pays allegedly two point five million dollars to get them in. We know the families that donate a wing to a building or donate a library. Well that sometime. A nurse to the benefit of everyone. So I'm thinking, well you donated the library a kid got into Harvard. Okay. My kids sitting in the library. Now, I may not be buyer. But this is fraud. This is someone taking the exam for your kid. This is very very different. And that's sickened me and the athletic part really sick. And because you all know, you know, my kid is the three sport athlete. I've been the mom that has seen him sitting in the Epsom salt bath all night. I've been the mom that wakes him up at four o'clock in the morning because he's going to swim practice at five thirty when his friends are still in bed. I've been the mom where you know. He's got a leave our summer vacation because he's got preseason football. And these kids these parents are superimposing their kids faces, but what my kids face. Let me letting kids going to go to Harvard or Princeton, and he's gonna finish these kids are going to go six months, and then they're gonna get kicked out. I don't know a lot of those kids have graduated that. Go to somebody writing them papers for years. We don't have that much time left. And I just want to get one thing and really quick. First of all what you're saying about Harvard is actually huge scandal right now that they were accused of letting in too many Asian students Google this. It's even though they qualified obviously for for whatever. But they didn't want a disproportionate amount of Asian students at Harvard University. Okay. For me, specifically, not everything is about my family. I know I remind tweets I know what you guys are saying. But aunt becky's husband talk crap about ASU. Okay. And at state university is where the McCain institute for international leadership is partnership with ASU. They find students identify develop and train a global network of character driven leaders that I have the luxury to be a part of that institute, and it was chosen because ASU is a premier educational system as well. And maybe it isn't as good from some people Hollywood elites perspective as Harvard and Yale. But let me tell you something ASU has a president Michael crow who. Who has an incredible president doing doing incredible things for a long time? And they clap back and said ASU has no comment on glib uninformed remarks. But underlying this is something important that deserves attention. Some universities have decided the most important thing. They can do is turn away deserving qualified applicant just so they can seem more excluding. So I'm just thank finally, I'm very proud to have my family's name attached to ASU is an incredible incredible incredible, college and aunt becky's, husband, whatever the hell. You are annoyed were telling yesterday. Sorry. Your kid probably would have been good enough to even got into a good hair to go to jail. That's big not just mentioned say missions per second. Not wanna just students got an I'm getting a correct nod enough Asia students where let in by Harvard because they were thing as legacy admissions. Which means of your parents went to Brown or Harvard or you pay you can go, but it's interesting because the idea of legacy admissions is racist in nature, and I'll tell you why it started in. Twenties to keep upwardly mobile immigrants who had started pushing for admission to elite schools. Yeah. And I think that that is a very very bad system legacy. Why should you get in because you got him? Yeah. The only thing I will say it is not what title have any. I was the first of my whole colonies military academies. My family goes back generations at the naval academy and that service to your country. So I would push back in that in that part of it. Because my grandfather grandfather, my brothers. They all serve there. You don't have to. Why should you have a great my brother did? But I don't think there's anything to be ashamed of the fact that my family's legacy is at the naval academy. My father's buried. I'm not talking about your family. I'm told us that I'd like to see he's all about the policy of weight legacy admissions came from. I'm very very proud. It was. Me and Jews probably out of the colleges. Well, let me back. Yeah. One big question is will these parents go to jail. I mean, the US attorney said that there shouldn't be disparate treatment. I wondered is the American public ready for these parents who are parents who are in jail for food stamp fraud, and their parents who are in jail for welfare fraud. And there are parents who are in jail because they pretend okay that they lived in another. Pay carrying these parents. I wanna talk also so much news. Why haven't those going cleans been grounded in the United States? That's another question. We'll talk about that. When we come back, and why is Mitt Romney blowing out candles one. At a time. Okay. So, you know, these ladies aren't afraid to voice their views route it, but now it's time for you to voice yours so wrap your phone and join the conversation, put arsenal wild. Meanwhile, your take on hot topics. Have you been reading off and Joan forget on Facebook, follow us on Instagram and subscribe to our podcast on thought cast. Thought cast worse plunges weekdays on ABC. Head warmer bachelor croton and Cassie on their wild and bumpy ride into each other's arms. And funny man, Jay Leno on the politics of late night comedy. Okay. This is not. Okay. We'll we'll keep this short because they talked about this yesterday. But it's still a problem in the country because they FAA still have not grounded the model of airplane involved in two deadly crashes in the past six months, the Boeing seven thirty seven max eight. So if you're going on that plane, take no don't get on it. Even even American pilots. This is the news a wanting them that these are there are technical problems. The company is to investigate they even I was reading that some pilot wrote a letter to death. I saying several before. Yes. Well, I only read six of them. I think are complaining. I mean, come on very quickly. What I read was that these chain. They were these safety upgrades to the jet software to fix this automated safety feature, but they were delayed until April in large part because of the thirty five day government shutdown. How do you like that? Well. That is nine when it's happening. You know peo-? Yeah. People are at work. It's not it's not feeling the country. And then you find out that is a connection just got on the show, I call them because a lot of these planes are flying to Miami southwest United American, and I asked if they had a policy if people f-r-o-t-h uncomfortable and wanted to change in the airlines are not offering any special policy. They are not allowing people to change without change. You know, they the because of the flight attendants because of the passengers because of the pilots because people having signed in our nervous, I think there needs to be a special policy for I always say the most important job. If you're a politician is to protect the people that you serve, and this is one of those instances, I know some of spoken out, but even for the president to to play a larger role because if we want these planes grounded, you need to get involved with the people that run Boeing and say, this is more important than your reputation. This is more important than anything else about protecting the people that we serve another pilot. It'd be paranoid too right now. I mean, you know, I think my friend Josh sums it up in his tweet bench. I'm no aviation expert. But I don't think we should be flying on those planes that keep crashing. We have a tweet. Okay. To be paranoid about planes. That are crash, right. Totally. We'll do not get on them, especially what everybody needs to walk off the plane, the pilots and the white tennis walk off the plane. Why don't you airlines come on two hundred dollars change fee? Can you wave that can you waive the change fees? Don't want to get on that airplane. They do for snowstorm. They do for a hurricane. They thought. Why would we not be concerned when you have pilots one of them anonymous- anonymously said that he was flying without being adequately trained. Yeah. For the new system. I think we are rational to say, I don't think I want to get on that plane. That's pretty normal the Boeing CEO Dennis Muilenburg. Smoked Trump today. Well, yesterday spoke with them, and they they said, it's fine. And so he's he's okay. It's okay. It's says he didn't do it. That's what didn't do it. No one did anything. Okay, fine. It's okay. To be fearful and. I'd like to go on what is it one of them? Let them go on their on planes. All right. I don't have time to make this transition to something fun. So we'll be right back. Why? I'm Jay Leno everywhere. I go people want to know about late night comedy in politics. Finally, a chance a daytime show where the subject of politics, never come up. I am so happy. Leno Jay Leno bid. Farewell to the tonight show back in two thousand fourteen if only known at the time that Donald Trump would soon take the White House and become the greatest gift a late night comedian could ever wish for so here to catch us up on what he's been doing as well as his thoughts on the current state of state of late night, comedy and other things that are going on in the world is my old friend, the legendary Jay Leno. Up to the only man that ring joined Megan together. That's. True. I actually have friends on both sides of the. Rather you you don't like the idea that the late night comics, so one-sided is that true that like the idea just the fact that all the jokes? It's kind of the same joke. I mean, I love them all I mean Samantha and Jimmy and the other Jimmy, and they're I mean, they're all really, but you all kind of doing different versions of same joke. That was my whole point that to me, I always liked to humiliate and degrade both sides equal. Yeah. That was the one doing such a good job up humiliating the grading themselves. But that was school Bob Hope used to do. But you see it was I did it. When Clinton was horny. Bush was dumb, and it was. Call a simpler time. You know, I stand up until Obama came in. And then I was losing interest because he was too good. And there was nothing to make fun of their. Bonanza want? Yeah. So what do you think about that young to Mitt Romney who blew out? Did you see this video video of of Mitt Romney, his blowing out his birthday twinkie birthday cake? Yeah. Twinkie birthday cake. And and because he's so good because he doesn't want to spread his germs all over the birthday cake close he'd one out at a time. Yeah. That was what I love Mitt Romney. When you opened the dictionary. And you look white guy. Gary. I mean, it's. Vote white guy. Public servant. I mean, I'm technically a white guy. But I'm talion when I see him. I know last. Got tie. And he's right. And you know, a more decent guy. You couldn't find me as a decent. You know, when his wife got muscular just took time off into care of her. I mean, he's really guy, but he's one of those guys like when white guys tell a joke. Well, here's a funny anecdote I was reminded. Though, you're doing it wrong. I would and his wedding. He was there. But remember when he tied his dog to the roof of the car once that about I don't I don't remember onto the region. Yes. Joking talking about fasting and dieting and put a ten days ago. That was the one thing he did. I did not like I chase. I don't know. You can't yell at me for that. Public service announ- public service. I mean, how many times have you gone to kids party and? You don't want the cake jazzy ninety just has that. Yeah. Gee. Golly. Wilkerson going. The Gino when he swears he go tally on getting you know, you see it. You know, I never heard English swear windows. Yelling Italian Mitt Romney gully. I'm gonna punch that full. He's mormon. I grew up Mormon. So I understand it's the whoopsie daisies. You find ways around it. Yeah. I totally get it. That's a perfect explanation. Ways to get around it because I mean, if you don't drink you don't I don't have a lot ways she has sex. She's got to guess what can America we have a lot of we have a lot of hot shop. We still we still have our prices Dan's. Yeah. I'm I've since I. Rails. This is not how I want to impress. Jay Leno on this show right now. Okay. So we were talking about this college admissions scandal on okay, tell me why. I love it. Because it's got movie stars. It's sports got money got rich people screw in poor people. It's. It's the classic news story. The best news store before this was Robert Kraft with the patriot. You had the Super Bowl you had a rich guy. Go into like, different classes finally meeting. Oh, a hilarious. Yeah. That was hilarious. And that woman showing up every every Republican politician you like the western hemisphere. But listen, in fact, I'll tell you the job I had during the break. But I can't do it here. That's a team that was wrong. As you know, that's wrong. Next month is the White House. Correspondent for the first time in my memory. We have no comedian. A lot about that. I think about that. You know, the first time I did it with Reagan who had a sense of humor. He had a very humor. What is the first time? I ever got nervous at a gig because I get there. And I'm back stakes. You know? This is the eighties. Okay. Mid eighties in this general comes in. You know, he's got the hat on. He's got all the goes. Comedian. I said, yes, sir. Let me tell you something just as my president understand. This is my commander in chief poking me. He goes you don't make fun of him. You don't denigrate. How God I go sign. Go home. And then George Shultz comes in member having Greg Leno. Nail Ronnie's as. Thing of his head. You thinking their color. Has general. Through. Founding. That was I want to do. It was pretty. Reagan tell you to Reagan was actually, you know, he was like colonizer story because we have to take a break. Get on a tight budget here. Okay. We'll have. Oh. When it comes to hiring. You don't have time to waste you need help getting to your shortlist of qualified candidates fast. That's why you need indeed dot com. Get started today at indeed dot com slash ABC. That's indeed dot com slash ABC with the Capital One venture card. You earn unlimited double miles on every purchase every day, and you can use those miles toward travel expenses. Like flights hotels, rental cars and more capital. One. What's in your wallet credit approval required capital? One Bank USA an a. Comedian Jay Leno, and you in the middle of telling his story about Ronald Reagan before we get to cholesterol. What the Ronald Reagan story. He was really a good comic. And I was sitting with the ones you Jay good student AS Roma's, president, wasn't aggression. He was you know, gee, I wasn't Christine either kick myself thinking how much further I could've gone. Find applied. The greatest show. Now, the other thing is before we go before we come on with this. What's the cholesterol, nine one one campaign, you work with what does Rodney Dangerfield after I'll tell you? I had Rodney on my show. Yeah. And inveighing reggae. JJ watching round. And he was we all know, we study other comics Rodney, hey, Larry, his his movements off, and I said to my producer, you know, Colo Colo paramedics, I think Rodney's having a problem with someone. She goes really just just call them. So writings finishes, his standup. Very funny sits down sweating a little more than normal. But okay, timing is all my infraction. Only another comic would notice. Okay. And I go to the dressing. How you doing? I'm okay, I'm okay. And he's doing that. So the paramedics show I'm gonna go where they here. They wanna talk. Well, he had a mini stroke while he was out there. And the paramedic said to me, you know, you probably save him from a heart attack. And I thought I didn't do anything. I just noticed my friend seemed a little office game. And and I felt such it like, you know, when you make people laugh feel great. But when you maybe you save somebody makes feel a little bit better. Right. But the part of the star you alight a couple years. Like that. A couple years later. Rodney had another one bad and he's in a coma. And is right before he died, and I went to the hospital his wife Jones Fabisch she's sitting there with them. And she has Rodney's coma. I think he can hear us. But he can't react to them Kay. I'm talking to Rodney, and she says Jay put your finger in these hand. She has Rodney if you know jas here squeezes fingers. Why feel this squeeze my finger? And I went Rodney that's not my finger. Rodney anyone like this move and. And and you know, I mean. I mean he passed away right after. I really felt like I made one of my heroes laugh, and and I thought I mean, the fact that it got it got it got a reaction from him. If I'm ever gonna come would you come and visit. Well, that that's kind of why got involved with his cholesterol nine one one you go there, and you check it on it just has questioned. We're not I'm not selling. Anything is no medicine. I'm not I'm not a reverse mortgage guy. I'm trying to screw your grandmother out of our house. That would just trying to make people aware. Just ask your doctor these questions that are on the website. That's all asking do not buying cholesterol levels because that's. Take a look at the questionnaire you go onto the internet. Yeah. Tells nine one one right? It tells you doctors tell you what to what to ask it. Sometimes it's hereditary high cholesterol. There's all kinds of I got a friend of mine runs three miles every day. Those the kale salad thing had a stroke. He's pissed at me. I'm watching you guys eating bon-bons, you know. And he goes, hey, how come I had luck? This is what it is. You you don't you look at look at Luke Perry. Young. Fifty two heart attack. I don't know what the cause was implying. It was. But this all I'm saying is you go, and you ask your doctor these questions people go with my friend. Larry the shell stations. Listen, the Larry don't listen to me laughter is not the best medicine. It's a terrible medicine. Having a stroke, you tell them a joke. It's not gonna help. Now. You know, so ask your doctor does release endorphins. I'm just saying, no, just j you. And I go way way way back back. You have me on your show at ton of times not to humble brag. But I've always been two thousand ten when I was super young wonderful to my father. I just wanted to say that we're in an era where men in media are just being taken out left and right for being pigs. You were the most we spectacle to women kindest nicest man, I ever worked when I just want the world to know. There are good men in many hot even where I wanna go. To death. You don't make jokes about your wife. Your wife was nominated for Nobel peace prize at work. She did with Afghan women. Do you think part of it is because it's incredible. She's incredible eighty you just have you have an incredible wife. They. Going. I like, you know, my mom was woman. You know, it just seems like I mean, a lot of this stuff used to be just called being polite now, it's called politically, correct. I guess, but it is just a matter of being polite and being sensitive to people's needs is a comic you read faces. And and enjoy you know, there's time I mean, I used to do a Hillary Clinton. Joe camera with the joke was but ever get this kind of. And I go, okay, they're laughing at it. Not because it's a joke. But because it's a woman and just took joke out of my act because I didn't like the the tenor of the laugh was getting glad you're not on today. Given Trump president I saw 'em because to me it's easier. When you kinda like, you know, the first time I had Bronco bomb on the show. He was a Senator and he came by himself, and he had his coat over his shoulder. James Rockwood Obama running for president. I said, okay. Let's look at this a black guy named Hussein that nobody's ever heard of you. To run to the fell off the chair, laughing your names Hussein from wear greats. Has really funny. Yeah. Yeah. He he's he's good. Nobody would ever wanna follow him at the car. Nobody wants to either. So thanks to. For being here today. We love you. We'll be right back. Kathy change your mind after bailing on Colton. What's their relationship status right now? And did that visit to the fantasy suite main? He's not Colton the virgin anymore. Nobody interrupts. There live on the view next. Vince, we view we're rolling out the hot topics. So Hello for SNL cast member eighty Bryant hits the table for the first time where hit a have a good laugh. Okay. It's all this week on the view. I'm very excited. We are finally at a point where we are on the same page. I can't wait to wake up next to her over and over again. This is one season of the bachelor where the rules of engagement went out the window, but colon would not give up on Cassie. And it looks like it paid off. So please, welcome. Former bachelor Colton Underwood and Cassie Rando. We are. We are so excited to have you here and congratulations. It looks. Like, you guys are really happy. And I do wanna ask that seemed like Cassie up until the very end you had doubts even after he sent everybody home for people that still are wondering when was that moment that he was your forever love when did that happen? You know, I think that really happened. Fortunately, all. I think up until the end there's just so much pressure and so much going on. It was just got really overwhelming. And so once the cameras went away, and I was able to really look at my feelings, and I saw that they were truly real. That's when I kind of realized that okay? This is legit. And he'd say you took a risk because there was no one left. You could be sitting by yourself today. Right. And it was one of those things I was in the relationship when I was trying to read where her struggles were call it whatever you want. But I firmly believe that, you know, the show in general it was just a little overwhelming for and we would be more compatible outside of the cameras. Eight off those tears real all the time. I'm just wondering. Yeah. Because you're on camera at the same time, you feel like crying very film so much that there was actually a lot more than. Yeah. Pretty much film. Big Cassie your father surprised you in Portugal to talk you out of accepting proposal from Colton and that talk lead your break up. So how is everyone getting along now with your father and your family and Colin get along? Great. I don't think my dad was ever really talking me out of a break-up. I think you saw my feelings and how I was feeling and he supports me, and I respect his opinion. But I mean, in that moment, my mind was kind of all ready made up. So what I had to do. But yeah. Kolding? How's your relationship with her father? It's it's good. And you know, that's one thing too is just because I didn't get his blessing when I asked I honestly respected. You know, his decision. I saw where he was coming from. I respect them as a man and his father, and I know how much she values her family's opinions. And what their relationship is. So it was never like I never took. A personally I never was offended that he didn't give it to me. I understood where he was coming from yesterday. You guys were hot topic. And we talked to we talked about how intent Colton was to get you back and how he deep down was so convinced that you were in love with him. And a lot of people felt that that was a little stalker ish. Yeah. And did that cross your mind for a moment when he showed up and was knocking on the door. Or were you like, wow. This is like really awesome. I honestly it was like, wow. This is really awesome. Yeah. I I have never had. A feeling of regret. Like, I did when I left Colton that night. I was just sad. I was really sad. And I miss them. And. There's a lot that goes into this into the show that we don't see. Yeah. You guys see a small small portion us as human beings to. So while I appreciate everybody who feels like they know me, you know, there's a lot more to us as human beings and a lot more to our relationship that you don't get to see very long process. I mean for me it was she knows third. This is my third show. The bachelor. Actually, that's what I mean. On camera is small idea the backstage, I said when we saw the clips of U2. after the show when the cameras were off in the mikes were off. That's when it seemed like you guys were really Manley love. Yeah. We have really got to know each other, and Colton we saw you in Cassie head to the fantasy suite. Yeah. Very open about the fact that you were a virgin, which I was very suspicious of that. Yeah. But can we now say, you know, without without any hesitation that? You're not a virgin anymore. No, that's actually something that we've talked about. And when I headed when I went into the fantasy sweet I was worried about fighting relationship and having intimate conversations. But we've since then I've been very open Canada virginity. And now that there's two people in out of respect for everybody involved. Really? I think you'd being respectful and saying it is between the two of them. But I think it's Icee that he's a new man and his aides experienced probably new physical changes, and we're all whatever happened. By the way. Let me tell you this one almost died yesterday when she found out you weren't following her on Twitter for whatever I love the love of what with one of our executive producers, and I like. On the bachelor. Really talking about something, and I really like respected when like whatever you were saying to him. So I was like, okay. Okay. It's been trying to get her into. I've watched every season. So what's the takeaway value here? Are you going to consummate this relationship? Dating and we're happy. Oh, I'm I'm hanging threat here. I mean, I mean your virginity. I mean, we introduced you every topic as the virgin Colton big deal. Damn she thought John. This is the issue. Well, the issue isn't that that I made it that was never my dentist. I never identify myself. As virgin, I'm so much more than that. Do I think it's overplayed, absolutely. They overplayed the hell out of. I am. I am much more than just that label. I hate being labeled as that. And I'll I'll open it was overplayed, thank you twenty eight hundred nineteen once you say reversion this time in this period. Is that to be honest. I didn't think it was going to play. It did like that. Oh. I hate talking about sex on television is everyone knows. And I wish you guys the best. You may say wait until I was married before. I lost my virginity. I don't think there should be any stigma on the choices that people thought you were very strong and both of you in talking about your life and your sexuality, and where you are today that were you surprised at at how big and do you think it got that big because you're a man. Right. That's right. I actually think it got that big because I'm a man and what my past career was football football. I think that stigma of being what we're supposed to be as athletes, and we're supposed to build up, these exteriors or this the exteriors and be tough and be manly. And like that was a stigma and a stereotype associated with athletes is you're not you're anything, you're anything. Virgin. So and for me, I know that was that was something I struggled with her. That happened Cohen cast. Congratulations. Thanks. So I have to watch the show to find out if he loses his virginity is that what has debate you still don't know. Well, I don't know. But I know this all have a great day and take a little time. Are you hiring with indeed you can post a job in minutes set up screener questions than zero in on your shortlist of qualified candidates using an online dashboard get started today at indeed dot com slash ABC. That's indeed dot com slash ABC. 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Bob Saget

"I they j.j Gilbert. God ridden would you like game per? Video shoutout from me, Gilbert Godfried of course, you would net y you'll go to cameo DOT COM Slash Gilbert? Godfrey. For birthdays weddings, anniversaries, graduations slowed stop go do cameo dot com slash Gilbert Godfrey. It's the perfect gift. Would you be surprised if scientists learning how to fight covid nineteen from Welshpool Crop? Told you that I could spoil almost any movie based on who uses an iphone or that the cute animal crossing virtual world has turned into a capitalist nightmare that people are spending tons of real money on. Did you know that Disney apparently has a preoccupation with butts well, that's wild wild tech, the Post that brings you the. Most bizarre the most interesting stories about tech and how it's shaping our culture while tech is hosted by Jordan Erika Weber that's me on me Joshua Rivera and every week will uncover infamous stories. Input Culture and tech will learn from the experts and talk to the people who lived through these stories like when the to computer programmers decided to create an ai that made billions of melodies justice rep, the world of copyright law when they made Steph curry so good in NBA Two K. it broke the game or the time when you know what you should just listen subscribe to wildwood. Tech for free on apple PODCASTS spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi. This is Gilbert Godfrey Niches Gilbert Gottfried. Amazing Palazzo Show my goal votes ranked Santo Padre gets sweet. Were turning to the show for more abuse after having appeared with us way back in two thousand sixteen he's an actor writer, the director, Cajun? Own Mutes, H. and a podcast host and one of the funniest and most provocative comedians of each generation. You've seen him in feature films like half, baked. Critical, condition. Dumb. Laura I meet wally sparks I was in that. Read My. I. Who It is we're for forty. My name I, swear to God my credits kill myself. You've seen in films that no one that saw the over at least the last paragraph all director dirty work. But to. Say here whatever wherever frank though what I say you were also in the aristocrats that bats Were you. You're responsible for it. Your. Paragraph K.. Snoop, I'd cast it's called Bob. Sagi- year for you and he doesn't know it yet but he's going to tell us the story Rodney Dangerfield and Orange Star Ron. Jeremy. Boys welcome back our old friend. Man Elijah and the only other person but sides yours jearl lean. On the show who's the put trade Abraham Lincoln are POW. Jagged. That's true. Thank you. Daniel Day Lewis did a job not as good as my roast of Abraham. Lincoln you're sensational. It happens. was. All Jeff I just sat there and took abuse like usual and other people got the credit of the actually the the forgot the name of the amazing comedian. The did Harriet Tubman. She crushed it the one that I was on Gilbert you're on one of them I Wish Hitler. Nice roasting, Frank. That's really good. It adds to the resume stays in context with the rest of your work. I liked it was tasteful. I agree. I would say something really foul right now but I can't. I tweeted something I'm going to get in trouble with us. It isn't a bad doctor because I just had to get Cova test because I'm doing a television show on Friday so they wanted to come to my house three days before i. do the television show which means I could definitely get Kobe by French kissing a ups driver tomorrow but they don't care. They just wanted it today and I wrote in Twitter I. is it a bad doctor because the swab is supposed to go in your peanuts whole right? So I'll probably be banished twitter. On A and I don't think most people call it a penis whole I think they say you're Retha. throb. Medical people were you were you were almost doctor. You should know this stuff I was I was a proctology just on corners. Job. I set it up as a punch and judy puppet show and people would just put their but up into the curtains and just go in. How're you doing what's going on with you guys? Well I remember for a while we were sending each other. We were sending each other emails back in yes. And each one got dirty and perverse and last one. Yeah we can't any of it. Yeah and we both had the idea. Let's put this out as a book. Yeah, and it was going to be my my. Conversation by conversations with Godfried by conversations with God yeah. I sent it to my manager. Go ahead I think you're going to call it to stay with Godfrey. Good. Yeah. I think that would we could we into a whole series of books that will put us in prison. It would definitely ruin whatever else we've tried to row with our careers. And my manager read the emails and said. You need to destroy us. They're not on my server, but I have them saved on a hard drive somewhere. So one day in thirty years when everything is. Doesn't matter anymore. We can release this to entire society of just derelict's just terrible. Horrible. Perverted people that fans that's the rule of law we have to wait thirty years Bob Yeah, it's really that bad. Bob Unlike me as worried about preserving his career. Well. No you Gilbert. You did something lovely and your documentary people should see what's it called Dilbert. How'd you come up the name? A hell of a business for miniature toiletry products and it really was a good. And I just think that people should see that because that. You just a sweetheart and You do what I do, which is we say the unthinkable because life. So painful that. The option is we sit there and actually have the feelings and cry all day. So instead, we talk about doing horrible things to people that. Are. The kindest people. You know that's where we say things. You shouldn't say you know the we were the kids. The first people that would hear God forbid a Helen Keller joke back in the day in elementary school and we've told those jokes and we were wrong but it's only because it's so horrible. It was like I'm the first person that would go how you wouldn't do this but I would how a person with Helen Keller's problems because I would. You know she was a genius she was she she went through a lot more than you or I I mean I wish you were blind and deaf and dumb. I. Saying I'm saying I wish you were the the new Helen Keller. Where did your dark? Where did the darkness in your sense of humor come from in part from your dad who would tell you dirty jokes at at It was Har. It's what about when you're five year I was just talking about this with my podcast. with I call people sometimes I talked with one Gilbert I need to have you on my podcast so we'll talk about that. You're now. Okay. then. Fine, you can't do it, but it's it's videos well, so you'll need to be looking at me. I know it's hard for you, but you're going to need unscreened. That I know that just your eyes are very very. You know you've got an issue with the sun. A great career would spotlight Senate to stand there. Obviously sensitive is I, think Mitch Hedberg tinted glasses should've come your way ten years. You should go on stage like George Shearing Gil I. I mean earlier hold onto that Mike, two hands because you can't see anything in your afraid the ships going to sink. So I truly suggest that you get some kind of tinted contacts or realize that your chosen field. Once you're allowed to go out and perform again I know you will get those scholastic, both Dean Martin and Ed Mcmahon Wall late call the swifty Lazar know. What's The court of a glass is. Permission. Yes. You should have them and they would be made of lead. So it pulls to the bottom of the ocean when they grow you in. Budd Friedman dill. Buds. Okay, right. Yeah. I hope so. Yeah you. We we know him a long time. Always. Yeah. He's in a wheelchair now. So if you in here by the DOC, if you sitting on his lap, I'd push both in. Do you remember meeting Gilbert for the first time and wasn't at the Improv? I think it might have been ed catch I. Think it was at a sperm bank and he was. He was a receptacle. No I think because of the height he and I got along. Great. I think it was it was a catcher as much. Yeah. Catch and he had. Had the JU- fro and A. And I had a font. I had a big old boo font that looked like I work. In the clinical area of of an administrative. Doctor's office I. Don't know what I'm saying I had a big big old hair I remember. Hanging out with you at some hotel. In La, I was doing something for Latin and you're doing something full house. And a waiter walked by with the desert wagon. And in the middle of the conversation, you said, Oh hold on a second Gilbert and you turned around and farted hunt this survey. No I didn't you who I'm not capable of doing that. Sure. Covered I. DIDN'T I? In public. How this a long time ago. So this is like twenty five years ago. Yeah. So this was you had that talent back then Oh, what I remember it was a carrot cake but I turned into black forest cake. Cap. Trickled the cake. I. Did you sure it was not love it somebody that we know of it. Maybe. Maybe zeal into. No don't start that again you trouble your. The way. Gilbert Gardner I you have caused me some trouble because I will post something sweet about you know about. Kids you're being a father or something nice on my instagram or twitter and the response is on Youtube I'll talk about stuff and my podcast and you say young people actually believe what you're bit was at my Rosta comedy central. And? Ninety. Stupid people are is they don't know irony sarcasm or the wickedest thing is the thing you say to the nicest person now you're finding humor in this time. The rose I was like Oh God. This is funny because we're all the bad boys club and it's normal. Donald Sitting There Jeff Arlen Lot of our friends Jim Norton people that we cared about and Lawrence Lieberman, clorox, Leach men, and Suzy S men, and a lot of wonderful friends of ours and everybody's laughing because it's the worst thing. What's the worst thing you can say well, the times have changed. So anybody. It's listing that has been to such a a heinous experience. You know this was not meant to make light of that. It was meant to make fun of me in the most horrific way. Possible. The sad part is is that we have to explain that now. Near the guy that looks like he wouldn't have done it. I'm guy who's the father on TV and they're nineteen year olds sixteen year olds that actually believe it's. Because I used to have a joke that men can breastfeed I actually read that and then I went. Okay. I wrote it down and then I read it and that's where we're at. We're at a place that was a joke but that's what I said. But we're at a place where anybody read something anywhere. They believe it's fact and that's the news. That's the news. Somebody's write something down someone reads it. tweets it and it's fact and it's just a world full of shit bazaars in. The world it's it's the it's not just the media human beings. It's it's. His Gilbert always done things of reverence cancer question Frank. I had people die every year or two. So I had a cousin die of cancer when I was like nine I had uncles die every year different uncle died. So that was kind of like I didn't know how to deal with death. So we started joking about it and people that have had death don't joke about it unless there is skew I was because that's how I dealt with it. My Dad dealt with it the same way he was the oldest of four brothers and a sister and he outlived all but his sister who passed away a couple of years ago. But I got her remains in there in the yard. See if you're listening just one the see. You're listening. Yeah I love that you listened so. I I. It's funny to me like when you have to apologize for any joke, make nowadays because. When they say like that. So tasteless well, yes I. When you tell a joke like that you know a stay sleighs. Ten, no, and especially at a roast I mean that's that's the that's the stock in trade of roasts. But also Gobert stand up in my standup I mean right. Before we went into quarantine I had new hour and twenty minutes ready to do a special one. Then here I am not until I'm able to go back. And a lot of it was already happening the PC of it all. So if I want to say something bad, you know, I, take a long time to tether into it and then tether and then and then come out of it. So I'll set it up and say it can't say this anymore here's something I can't say then I'll say it and then I'll say this is horrible because it affects These people and then I'll try to do some little funny asides afterward. But I I gotTA buffer it in bubble wrap it because it's not meant to hurt anyone and you have to clarify that it's not and it's still hurts people I don't WanNa hurt people you and I wanNa make people laugh Gobert. That's just a fact you WanNa hurt Gilbert a little. Don't you bob very much. So tweeting nuts. How I got a real question, an honest question to you. And it's going to be very honest I. Hope it's not invasive. How Tall Are you? I think last time they measured me, I'm like fi four. Okay This is a serious question. have. You really found that your nut sack has grown has. Doubled the land? Is it like botchy? Balls is like? What are those things called that go back and forth those. Things on somebody's desk? Yeah. Yeah. Glengarry Glen Ross, the movie starts with. The wonderful movie version of David mammoths play people listening to play is something that people go see in a thing called the're and and then it's a great story by a guy named David. Mamat. WHO's a great play right between t writes down the play. So it's not a youtube video and it's not a sitcom or show on net flicks. It's actually in a theater. I don't know I lost your listeners. I. Think they call that thing a Newton's cradle. Does that ring a bell? Bob That sounds. So. Are they hang in longer? kind of like. When you're young you WANNA big bulge in your pants and when you get older, you get that at your bolt. Or goiter. How? You have. How I'm hoping for one. I didn't know when you started. You did you had a guitar it's part of your act for ten years. To when I was seventeen, I want a radio contest. For W. In Philadelphia and sang a song about. A seventeen year old singing a song about bondage already he's GonNa be fine. Gilbert what was your joke? Like you started at seventeen or something right Yeah. When I started I was basically like you know Frank Goshen or rich little. You know a was like. Off Impressions or Pro Yeah about that. Wow, I forgot that you did Sullivan. Never, on. stage. You did it off stage. Stage constantly by. Who who did you do? Who Did you who your impression Oh God? Humphrey, Bogart Laurie, Boris Karloff even better. Stop everybody could appreciate. That is dead. Dead. Dead when you started bill. Maher. is so disturbing and Do a bit that had both Richard Burton and James Mason and they both died within two days of each other. But you should write more bits about people that you want dead. Bob You're a fan of the old school comics. Obviously you knew Rodney, you knew rickles biden them. Well, I mean Rodney. was very close with and he started when I was twenty four. And put me in the young comedians specials. One of the many starts in my career I've had a lot and so I was on the one Sam Kennison and use them to Sam Kennison. And Sam is the thing that exploded out of that special and then and rickles I became I put him in the movie dirty work that I directed nor McDonald's movie and minorities and Bunch of great people in that and. Don and I became friendly through John Stamos really made that happen because John was close. He had had older man thing and introduced me to so many people I got to close with because of John Gary. Marshall One of my dearest friends in my whole life right now is Norman Lear who just turned ninety, eight, ninety eight and he's he's a a fucking genius. He is on the PODCAST. Yeah, and I see him all the time we do zooms with all of our guys. We have a cigar night with a music company that owned for years called concord after he stopped making television but now he's back making television. Yeah he's doing so much. He's got a new show that I can't talk about, but it's he's ninety eight and. He told me last year A. His show one day at a time came back to the Latino version and it's doing really well, it was canceled by a Netflix and then picked up by another I think pop. I'm not sure but it's really good. It's got a great cast read. Moreno and Hector Sandro is just a special special show. Any said he had to sign a three year contract at ninety seven? Can you believe. Her contract at ninety. Seven. He's in. And if you look at the Norman Lear and Instagram, he gives Monday his morning messages sometimes. Yeah and the human face when he turned ninety eight, he said I. Wish I could dig a hole and I got scared at the setup and then he said I wish I could dig a hole for all the gratitude I feel how deep that whole would be or wish I could fly on a Plane and go as high as I can to show how much gratitude I feel for every day that I have a live and for how much I appreciate all the people, all the love that I'm getting on my birthday and that's how we should look at Life I. Mean we've all been to shit I mean Gilbert you've been to a bunch of stuff I've been through a bunch of stuff. Franken or know your story of you've been too much of stuff. A little bit here and there what's the worst thing that you don't WanNa talk about that you've been through. Oh God co hosting this show with. You ever have almost lethal prostate exam. It's early yet Bob I'm hopeful I remember. There was a picture. That Allan. King had where he's with Martin and Lewis when they were back when they were team and they're all young in it and smile link and he titled The picture. Back before anything bad or sad happened. About the Web. That's nice. But I mean, he probably wrote that when we were pulling our troops out of Nazi Germany. Yeah I don't think there's been a time. In mankind where they haven't been just a bunch of fuck watts in the world, you know I was talking today about it on my podcast because I don't mention my podcast enough. It's called Bob Sag here for you I don't know how they came up with the name. But What's the name of your podcast? Number two you know Gilbert. Gottfried. Gymnasium call. So podcast. Name Aries. Gilbert. Guy You're renting. You're in Documenta right. Berkeley who did a wonderful job with that documentary there's also you and I are on bumping Mike's with Jeff. Rossen Dave attell on net flicks and you and I sat next to each other Andrew directly just rolled film or whatever the hell it was hard drive. And said that that footage. Is a special by itself. That you and I talked for like a half an hour. So I want to get a hold of it because. We just did this and sat next to each other and. I. Think I talked about what made you like how you are because we've had this conversation before I'm like. Did you have grandparents in the Holocaust your parents who was affected and it's like you said nobody in my answer was then why? An excellent question. Because it's almost like you have to go through that or have family that you go. Okay. I'm gone off the rails in what acknowledged Rodney by the way you brought Rodney up who who you were close to four year. Gobert teased I mean he teased it in the intro. So yeah, forty well, fortieth anniversary of caddyshack this past weekend. Yeah, and and Gilbert celebrating anniversary do you want to congratulate him on thirty years of Problem Child Bub? That's so fantastic. You Know People Love Problem Child Yeah. Kill through eight. So weird because when it came out, it was on ever critics were film lists. But the public loved it. I M people like every day. Practically they're in love with problem. You also have John Ritter. and. You got along well with him. Great. Yeah. He was store if. He is one of the biggest losses I am so sorry, he's gone because he was. He was such a beautiful person. One of the kindest sweetest and my heart goes out to amy as Beck in his kids and you know and I did a quantum leap once with her. So I kissed her on a quantum leap Cheswick. Here with us a couple of weeks ago, I love her and. And show. You know you don't get over losing the love, your life. and she and he was just also so talented such a good actor and. You know there's a lot of footage of him onstage with Robin Williams and that's That's amazing. Gilbert. You spent time on stage with Robin, right? I. Yeah. I mean one of the great honors is he would always come into the comedy clubs and a number of times would say or Gilbert come up here. And then we start ripping and it was like I like I said he was. Both exhilarating and exhausting at the same time. He was a missile it was unbelievable, and then when you think everything's okay, he would march down stage of foot and a half or March upstage a foot and a half and like this. Don't exist. Yes but the whole point was it's a play date and I can't control myself and that was the point of all of it and we're not talking about drugs. We're talking about a guy talking about all of us were guys WANNA play. So when we're together, there's a delight with Comedians with Robin when I was on stage with them, it would always because I was hosting something whether it'd be my Scleroderma benefit that you've been gracious enough to do. One night. At Caroline's in New York we did it and you performed and the performers were Jimmy Fallon and Robin and I was hosting and a you N. up and. We all just stood there and watched you and cried because you because we you know we get you so much and it's so hilarious. Who you are and how you do what you do, which there's only one you and and I would be unstaged with Robin. I would resort to this. He go ladies, gentlemen, Robin Williams he come on stage, and we'd maybe do a couple of lines back and forth I'm talking. Clever lines stayed dialogue and then and then I would literally dry hump and that's what I would do. I would just. Try. And he would go stop it. I'm to Harry Getaway I'm sweaty and and then it was the only thing but it was hilarious to him because it diffused And he is. A when you say his name to people, people are immediately sad because he was and will always be for. This hundred years that people are living One of the most beloved people whoever got on stage whoever did a movie? Whoever did comedy? With. All of his devils and with all of his he was also this amazing human. Replaceable People Ritter and Robin. Yeah, we got a bunch of. Those. But yeah, those two I gotta ask you one thing I heard about Rodney can't talk about. Listening listening to your podcasts and you were talking about Rodney and wondered if Gilbert would relate to this that Rodney compared doing standup comedian doing stand up comedy to being a border guard. Yeah. That's what I talk about. Rodney would say. Doing. Stand up man it's like doing trying to get a Nazi Germany. So you do six minutes for the guard at the border and you're if you're funny, let you go not shoot you in the fucking head. He looked at stand up comedy and that's why he was always sweaty always wanting to kill always feeling that desperation and not treated with respect for so long. Three names. Jacob Cohen, Jack Royer and Rodney Dangerfield and talk about them a lot because he's a legend and he didn't get caddyshack till. He was fifty eight I know Lake career very late movie career I remember him on Stage one time and you new material limit was bombing and then he stopped and looked at the audiences. It. And went. For anyone tells you your a hot crowd Ju- spitting netface? I. Do. You want to tell the Ron Jeremy Story since we teased it in the opening both yes, sure. I was I tell a lot because. I had heard it before. Yeah. It's a nice when it's good for the kids. Kids kids got laugh to. What happened was supposed to go to dinner with? Rodney. And I was GONNA take him to the palm which he had mid to for ten years because he was mad at them because one time he went there and they gave me one big claw little claw man. There was an insult. The lobster King Came and he went no man was not love to came. They purposely gave me a smaller. I. Think so And then he goes. Hysterically. He goes I went to pick them up seven o'clock goes right on time he was. In a robe and his balls or hanging out because he was always have. Hit a big cut down his chest because he had surgery took out all my guts man they made them next to me and they put them back. Look up fucked up it. He's got this jagged scar in the middle of his chest and he says to me. You didn't call to confirm. I, didn't think you were coming I mean we had a date. Yeah. and as I walked in his wife Joan was leaving with a friend and so they were going out on the town I. Think 'cause Rodney was going to be with me and. then. Rodney goes an I don't the. I got Ron Jeremy Coming up here with two hookers than I gotTa have him sign this release and it was first book and then I look at the release on the table and it's two sentences. It just says Eireann Jeremy. Allow Rodney to use me in his book, and then it's a you know an open blue dotted line firm to sign and that's I. Don't know if you've got holds up in court but. We want to stay and hang out and he's smoking a joint am I don't think. So Rodney everytime you shakes my hand I worry were his been I don't Wanna I, don't WanNa. Do it he goes all right. Man I'm sorry man I'm sorry any. He walks over to the elevator of people that don't know Ron Jeremy was. Still is I guess porn star who is very well known for being able to. Pleasure himself with his own mouth because he's like a Roly Poly Potato Bug. So It's not a pretty picture not something you want to see but that was one of his talents of besides being a big fan of comedy. So Rodney. Walked into the elevator which led just to his apartment. And Rodney is standing there and I see the scar in his chest than he says to me. Sorry. I'm really sorry. I didn't know I. Went. You know I just WanNa know how you're doing and he goes you are no harm doing I'll tell you home and you're leaving and I'm waiting for guy can suck his own cop that's how doing. And then the elevator doors close. And I literally. Laughed out loud. I could not stop laughing on. Truth. and. The truth. Funny Rodney was Rodney. And I loved presided over his over his funeral service. Yeah. Guy. and. I was insulted by some comedians. Jim. Carrey. was very kind to me after Jay Leno got up I. J said to me I gotTa Five o'clock flight to Vegas. Think I can go on early. Yeah I'll put you on early J. Edge atrocities funeral. And, but he must be sincere. Wasn't being mean about it except he did say eighty four that's that's a long life right and when I don't think so not from that perspective no, I don't think so all right. So but that was he wasn't there wasn't malice j you know. Yeah. Joe's always nice to me. I know people have had issues, but he's always been kind to me did my benefit and I was on the show when he hosted all that crazy that goes on in his stupid competitive business but and then he did do a comment about me which pissed me off he said. It's good to see Bob at working again that's pretty said. The Funeral. Out there were no other Roasti. kind of jokes it was kind of the only. Cruel joke. Nobody laughed because. It just was out of place because it was very rodney. Rodney wouldn't have liked it because Rodney really didn't like roast humor very much cheats interesting just like good jokes and he liked helping young comedians. Then Jim Carey when upright after and remember this to remember that Bob because he realized that I just been put down. At. Feud. Off. And I'm like and Louisiana's and put his hand me and he goes he doesn't mean anything by Bob don't worry. Very loving Louis is very loving but there was a heavy duty funeral. It was very painful. And it was sad. We couldn't do the prayers we want to do I felt bad for his kids who Brian. Beautiful Melanie and they gotta keep in contact with her I got a contact, her I feel kind of during Cova Union quarantine you kind of think. But the people you want to reach out to and you weren't one of them Gilbert. You reflect on your life. You know we had Garrett here a couple of weeks ago Bob and we were talking about how we all grew up on the on the Carson show. How was event television when one of these comics come on? Growing up in Philly we're you the kind of kid that would stay up late to watch carson to see infamous Rodney to see when when when rickles liaison absolutely watch the dean. Martin roasts, which we all upset I watch all of it but before that it was he johnny Carson was ninety minutes long. That sure told I am so I was in Washington DC staying at my cousin footsie's house and cousin tootsie. God bless her. She had always say that before you say seven terrible she had a holy. Savior laps and. And so she was on crutches and she was really mad at me Shit a beautiful apartment with. Her husband Jules and A The tyskie and I went to go visit them in Washington DC and I had dogs all over my shoes and didn't know and she had light blue carpeting much like the White House has although now i. think it's all orange. I'm not sure. I track dog shit all over and cheers she came out with her crutches and G by. Carpet she had a very strong southern accent sounded like Felix the cat and Mickey Mouse and she was actually loved her a lot and I stayed there alone. At nine years old, they left me with juozas sister, my aunt Becky who was senile. But she was taking care of me and I watched Johnny Carson New Year's and I lit a sparkler all by myself. And Johnny Carson was my companion at nine years old about that because he talked so like a person. And that's what a great great broadcaster he was said, he brought solace to a nine year old kid. and made me feel like I wasn't alone and I think the whole country felt that way about him. Dead. Airs. I I heard you talking to Jon. Hamm on your podcast about Carson and you still you still revere him. EH? Everyone should there will never be another? He was amazing. He was incredibly kind to me. And he was probably in an Letterman was also one of the best that will ever lived and also took his cue from Janis. Greatness. and then everybody we have. Now I'm enjoying I don't enjoy zoom television but. I get solid sometimes in Stephen Colbert my friend Jimmy Kimmel and you know. Sometimes you you get something that feels good when you're watching. The guys in doing late night, we could use a lady in there. Almost Arsenio bit read I think there's a a lot of open holes just in Gobert body alone. We will return to Gilbert Godfrey JR amazing colossal podcast after this support for this podcast comes from state farm with surprisingly great rates. State farm is the real deal when it comes to home and car insurance state farm agents are always ready to help you personalize your insurance plan. You can create a policy that fits your needs. You can manage your coverage, pay your bill or even file a claim right from your phone with the State Farm Mobile. APP, and you can always call one of the state farm agents in neighborhoods across the country. 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T it up a lot more careful but I. think he went out before this happened and I saw his show near the end. I loved him so much. It's. You know he was full of love I'm sure he was always kind to you right Gobert. Do, you know I've never met Don rickles. Oh. That's right. He told me by choice. I'm really sorry I'm sorry I brought it up. What was what was dinner like with him when he was when he wasn't on Bob Well, who's being? Honest with me I know he was always trying to get you John to settle down that was important to him. He'd always tell us this. You know stop. Stop dating kids. You know. You would always make jokes telling thirteen year olds can't say. You can't say that. And it was all his his act was. You know making fun of everybody and it was it came from. A place of bad time and a place of love. I think a good example for people that haven't seen it and talked about it before is if you WanNa see Don rickles and get what he meant. And get where he was coming from watch. Denzel Washington on Letterman guerrilla. Yeah. Watch the whole lot. It was a whole thing has denzel on for three segments and then don can you believe you wanted to stay during my segments and Donna's like a little kid? He says I can't believe it. Oh my God does he get me? Does he think I'm funny and Denzel's there and done. Comes out and he says stuff to Denzel like get my car and things that are. Just horrific and and no one else could should or would say like that and Denzel is crying. Because what he's doing is he's would ends impossible to explain. Yeah but he's making but it does it does for some people that does further racism and for other people, it's shining a light on it right? Because that's what he meant to do. But eastern a different generation where the rat pack would do impressions of Amos and Andy and when I hear that now. It doesn't sit well with me. When they do that all of the frank and dean these guys I love the rat pack, but don would do it some but not it was different with Don. Don? Spent. A lot of time also. Eat every, ethnicity yeah. Jews were not spared. Waspy people were not spared, but you can't do that at my friend, Jimmy car- WHO's on my podcast This week. And Jimmy. Come Funny Comic Jimmy He's very actually love. Is In our vein, I mean the one ARPITA says. He's he's wonderful. He's in Britain knees he's fantastic and he. Had A great joke I'm not GonNa do it justice and said you know everything's changed you WanNa do things at a prolific PC and? If you're. Jewish make fun of Jews if you're black, you can make fun of blacks of your Asian. You're the only one that can make fun of Asians and he went through an another couple of. People, and then he said, take me for example. When you're a pedophile, you can own and then stops talking. To basically he's just calling himself a pedophile that's basically, and and that word you know I'll say something that's irreverend or some dirty or the reference a you gave me on your roast a my rose that you said that horrible thing and then I'll read somebody say Peto, and that offends me a lot. It upsets me a lot and when I was single I got divorced twenty five years ago I dated people that were. Like younger than me, they were all legal there over twenty one but I was forty, one, forty two and I went to a little bit of a face, but I didn't do. I, never was a Predator people had that you know this covert you're like this. Also women had to throw themselves at me I'm sure you went to that a lot of Darah where women would literally throw themselves. Physically literally. And throw to the ground and their their their reason was to crush you to crushing. Then destroy you. I was like Kat city. You were. was you're like Butch Cassidy? Jumped, off the cliff. You talking about that clip of rickles and Denzel Washington. And they was funny when you watch it rickles is making these rate Denzel one point. What are you hear the after sweep up afterwards And then Joe Washington is honored by it. Yes and he's trying, yeah, he's crying and he's slouching in the chair more relaxed than I've ever seen him on anything. And you can tell the don revered him. because. Don also was an actor and he wanted to be an actor and wanted to be bigger and movies. And he knows the Denzel is and will always be one of the greatest actors. Of all time. And you know I mean I was within with. I wished ends up but unfortunately don, not. Doing his humor and it's not good as Donna dinner and Sidney Poitier walked over. And he did the same joke, he said they, Sydney. Versed he came over and they hugged each other and then Sydney, at that time I think it was like eighty seven or something and I don't know how old he is now, but he's he's he's one of my heroes for God's sakes and and done said, get my car and. Then he's talking to you know one of the most beautiful human beings that ever lived in changed. Movies and changed acting for. Black actors. And he was one of the very few. It's it's. Had Whoopi, on my podcast and we talked about it had been thirty five years forty years someone. African American was nominated for an academy award. Howdy mcdaniel I think. Yeah, been a long time. So I mean that's that speaks volumes and I think. The change has happened and it's GonNa Change More and There's something very special about. The difficulty of this time I think I think some wonderful things will come out of these incredibly painful moments were all living through and. And there will be more unity and there be more justice for people. That's what I'm I'm hoping for us. Hope. Let us hope I know that dawn wants wanted to be honored by the Kennedy Center. And it never came for. Jimmy Kimmel really tried. Yeah. As. Blood, with the Kennedy. Sold history. Now. I think it might've been. It could've been part of the content of his material could have had to do with that I'm not sure I. Don't know. But he was honored at the Apollo Theater and I couldn't go to it because I was working and wished I could have gone and it was a beautiful night and the was treated. was. The beginning of the Apollo. I thought it was the Apollo I'm not sure but it was a beautiful honoring and. A lot of people spoke and paid tribute to this incredibly funny guy. He did things to me that were just hilarious. He I I've told this story many too many times told on your podcast back in the fifties. He he? I hadn't seen him after dirty work for a while and he grabbed me by the head in a restaurant. And he comes up to me and he goes I. Don't Miss You all. I. That's comedy. You know that's just that's what it is. That's what I love. Can I ask you a couple of questions from listen. I'm really sorry I'm under a agreement with. A operative. Homeland, all of it, all eight years. So I'm really looking wow, eight years in three weeks. This terrence stackhouse wants to know how much better would full house have been Gilbert had played the role of Uncle Jesse. Well. The point of of Go Jesse was Hong. So obviously with a Lotta prosthetics and a WIG and. And maybe be standing on a movable cart of. Play Joey but it would have scared the children could have been. As part on C., Gilbert, with a mullet. Able to work with Scott Y. Her again who was right He was. There you go and you're the voice of the parrot. Kaka. Parrot. COCKATOO. What's The. On Me Ongo IAGO. For like a fellow. O. IAGO yes sir. What's up fellow? It's from fellow. Because our fellows, a different word entirely here's one from Andrew Luck Osha what is no him and you want to buy the law do what is ops favorite memory of course, leach men at his comedy central. Roast. Just how nice she was how excited she was to be there because I you know I would I snuck into watch Mary. Tyler. Moore. Show and Bob Newhart show when I was young Oh and and I got to watch her work on Mary Tyler Moore show and I couldn't believe what I was watching sixteen or something fifteen maybe and then I Frankenstein. Has a block or Chooses. Unbelievably genius comedic genius said what she did and such a great actress and so I was excited she was there and she was excited because she had great material I didn't come here to roast, Bob Saga I came here to Fuck John, stamos. I mean know. You can't use an. I remember US lower sleet men. When she got up to the Mike said. You'll excuse me if I don't know if you are I'm older now and all I do is watch TV go to the movies and read magazines. And then she put down on, you youtube stars and all this stuff. As though all those people have no talent which we know they have amazing talent. Of course, some do some do some Youtube Star Watch what they're doing I'm going holy. Shit. Director. Movie. Ones I go. Everybody wants to be famous. That's like the weird part. That's. Mark, Arnold wants to know what it was like working with somebody Gilbert work with a great. Jack. Warden when you directed dirty work oh God having it was amazing. All I could think about was heaven can wait and and being there and all the movies that he was. Yes I mean I worship his work what what a consummate actor He was hilarious. He was so hilarious and so strong. Remember the producer was annoyed because he had to keep going can you give me a horror and a producer kept saying? Can you get him say or? And I went nobody's saying it old school. It's his way of saying it here there. And I went over to Jack said the producer wants you to say whore and he said, no, you also speaking of your directing Bob. What's this I'm hearing about a Martin Mull documentary. Yeah it is in process. It's been a bit on hold because of covid. So it's hard to shoot more, but we've had a lot of great people we've interviewed for. A Martin Mall is a guy that I always looked up to of people don't know his work they're missing something he was one of my comedian Mutasa musical comedian so he would write the best comedy songs we Fan Gobert of Martin's Oh. Yeah and I those albums you were on were you on firm with tonight I wasn't on Fernwood tonight I worked with him on till death. Okay. So two episodes that. He. Is An amazing artist and that's the theme of the documentary and Kevin Bright's to producer and I've been directing and. Or we both do both and. The point is to give Martin is do his art is unbelievable and it's so socially relevant because he's always been ashamed to be the whitest man in the world. And And grew up in Ohio and a very vanilla life and yet his show fernwood tonight. With Fred Willard, he and Fred Willard teamed up and it was beyond brilliant and it really was about. Like rickles thing it would. It would have they Fred Willard's character was racist how and we just say this stuff delightfully and about Jews and blacks and this and that and but it was meant because there wasn't. There wasn't a racist bone anywhere in that show and Norman Lear produced it who of course it all in the family and? Good Times in the Jeffersons Maude so is coming from a man who is. A for the the human rights in American way of good people show ahead of its time. I Martin Mall One said when men get older, they look like Sean Connery when women get older they look like Sean connery remember that. He was unbelievable and. So far, we've interviewed Steve Martin, and Eric Idle and David Alan Grier oh Many many people that Love Martin. Any also physicians plays guitar and Touch Mattis Life did a a great thing years ago. Believe it was on showtime, go the history of white people in America right television and it's you know can't be done now it's one of those shows that can't be done now but it's making fun of white people. and this documentary if you look at his art. In really deals with racial issues and how people black people in America have been held down. And that's his paintings. He is one of the most beautiful souls that I know and very prolific. Just he's writing wrote a book and he's finishing it and it's What I've read is just perfect I actually did the warm up for show that he starting called domestic life and Steve Martin and he were executive producers and Martin was the father and it was really good really good at had that wry sense of humor. Would have been like a home improvement type of show, but it was very smart and very didn't have a lot of hooks and it had Martin's kind of low key rise sarcasm and I did the warm up I remember doing the warm up with Steve Martin. He grabs a Mike and starts talking to the audience and. I had a mike also that was like an honor and I was trying to make Steve Martin Laugh and I was twenty. I. And I said, is he this jacket and Steve Goes yes I go ten thousand dollars and Steve Laughed I was twenty four, twenty, five makers, Steve Martin Laugh, and. He's one of my favorites also in life. have. You had him on the podcast Gilbert. Now have not had good Morton you gotta get bigger. You gotta get really. We had an Arkan couple of weeks ago and Arkansas goddamn genius. Yes, he is. Yes, he is. A movie with him? I remember one time. That comedy festival I was invited to be on stage with Martin Mullen Fred Willard. Where they were interviewing me like a what's my line where they both put on blindfolds and they were asking the usual question? Are you a singer? Are you a dancer is trump and then they said, all right we don't know. So it taking our blindfold saw and they both took their blindfolds off and looked at me and said. Are you in business. Ask. Oh my God how did it end up? Oh dressed like that like they never guessed who was own know how? is going to be dirty work sequel there. And will you will you include the donut seen I? Know people would not have old footage it'd be a new movie psycho. I talk of it by can't say more than that interest but there is talk of it and Norman I have been. Wanting to do it for a long time and so. We're we're at we're we're doing what you do. During this time it's hard to get things set up. You know Hey, you know no, one can work. Let's. Let's go to. Let's go make movie. I didn't know they were out of the theater and watch zoom of. People doing. What was happening is people are doing reboots. They're doing zoom reboots, your favorite things even Hamilton's coming up. It's going to be a zoom of the whole cast you know so. A lot of TV shows are doing it. They couldn't do the friends one. I don't know what happened but I'm sure they will at some point here. Here's one for both of you from someone who obviously listened to your first appearance here Bob 2015, fifteen. Brian, Hunter wants to know who gave the best head Ernest Borgnine Dan Blocker or Claude. I don't know who he's talking to I have to throw that to Gilbert. I think. That's an easy one. It was lying all add. A SILENT FILM STAR was what you'd want is you want WanNa silent film circus they won't talk about it afterwards. Time you were on, we were doing a questionnaire. Back Online who had the hairiest wall the. Best that, who gave the best task? We would want one of those gentlemen. blockers good name because it would be a cocker so you'd rule him out. You actually ask Gilbert who who had the most disappointing penis that he ever put in his mouth and Gilbert you said Richard Karenna. I could. Go there but I would say gig young. GIG y'all that. Sad actually yes. He actually took his own life. Horrible. Great. Actor Great. For twilight tones. I. Think what happens in it walking distance that's right. Whereas car breaks down from his town grew up in and he goes back there and he's back in time. And meets himself as a little kid. That they do that in every show on television now. But Pretty special. Yeah. Yeah. He is a great actor. There's so many great ones. Do you remember speaking of the Arkansas you remember making a Werewolf movie with that I was the first thing I did Larry Cohen Gilbert Larry Cohen I now. Was Great. He was great. He was made a lot of those movies. He also made that believe made blacula. Yes. I. Think he did he made a lot of blaxploitation movies with. Fred the Hammer Williamson. I don't think he made blacula. But he didn't are you sure I don't think that was one of his. He was already too good to be one. William Crane directed BLACULA. There you go. Yeah but but Larry Definitely He he that was genre was. That he moved around well in. Very comfortably, he was a total character 'cause every. Really was. Go ahead now I you're saying just about everything he said on the podcast you go. Okay see telling the truth to right now or is this total bullshit? Oh, so you have Larry on. Years. Scoring. He was wonderful larger than life. That's so funny. There's another one for you. Bob You had him on. Is Hilarious oh. Yeah. We love those guys I mean we you know we had We had Richard. Donner, here too. We love those director star. Jeffrey Dahmer Jeffrey? Dahmer. I remember that one guilders David Berkowitz cancel that. To who's who's your favorite guest you've had on besides me. Wow. So many we've I mean I I loved. Nielsen DACA. Jacket I. Love. Bob? Einstein. He's huge loss by. Another irreplaceable. Derek Long So we're. Talking about people that we can never replace but Bob. You're also talking for an audience that is hundred. So that's this show. This show is your audiences a hundred years old. Well, we're trying to teach seniors download the podcast. Sponsors we do. A is it mostly adult diapers and stuff all exclusively. Earlier louder and catheters. God. We. Blew. Commercials that start out are you aware of how expensive funeral convey? Bought this, you ever work with Pat McCormick. Would say shit to me because I was on the tonight show. So when I see him, he would come over to tell me real dirty stuff. Did you have them on? No, he went. Longtime he was a guy now the story about him as an old couple in the valley came over is, can you tell me how to get to Sepulveda's and Burbank Boulevard supposedly took out his penis and goes okay being encouraged. Any use that as a Thomas Guide. There's a reference Thomas Guide yeah. Right. Here's one that I haven't thought of in twenty years. Amanda Steph Stefaniuk says I've got to listen to the Bob's original episode to Jog my memory but I would love to ask him what was going through his head as nor McDonald performed his legendary roast. Seemingly cribbed from an old joke book. Well. I talked to norm on the phone about it and we had decided that he said I can't make funny in you're my friend went norm you have to do we do it rose, which is you got to criticize me or I'm just kidding me jokes from nineteen forties joke book and I went. DACA. Offers, you can't do that anyway I don't care. Don't make fun of my friends and. I went okay. I should say fuck at least is like Nah I don't WanNa. Do that. and. So it's hilarious. He ended up doing the craziest twenty minutes. If you remember Gobert it was just I hear. I remember he said. And I took my friend Gilbert and. I said this door backstage that says gentlemen well pay no he you can go. Right. Paying no heed. Doing. He was literally talking like Robert e Lee. Robert, but it was doing jokes from nineteen forties joke book, and at one point he's visited. Bob's got a face like a flower a collie flower. And then no no response because I'm saying you gotTA fucking dog face. Okay and then got a big laugh and then I'm like notting like, yeah. Yeah. Curse narms going to work and then he was doing his carson thing and then while everyone else was roasting me, he was reading the sports section, which is pure norm. I disagree with what Gender Gobert that was so much fun. We went to dinner with norm and Jeff Ross and you and me yeah repayment. Yeah I remember it was in La. Was in Jones Jones at Formosa. And it was just non stop laughing and joking now whole time and then. You and I were doing our our joke. Two Day. I saw the dummy window. So we were in that over and over again and Norman others is great. You're doing inside joke from last night's dinner. He was he was. Understandably annoyed you know. So. Funny. I love him very much he is. Obviously one of the funniest people alive route. But I went to the Friars Jeff Ross took me to the friars. Were you spent a Lotta time there right Oh yes. Yeah. A member. You it's well, I never. wrote out a check to them obviously and. League. Obvious. Show. Showing this Jewish person alive is that your thing show because? y'All I felt that any event where I could get a free dinner at. They eventually make me an honorary member right what. What will they needed? Needed up. there. So what happened? What happened you go there all the time I? Yeah, I've been I've been. Rose. Still there is gone is a they'd done I don't. Cove it before quarantine and they go away I think they shut the place they were having financial problems and they temporarily shuttered even before covid did someone steal money there was some embezzlement. allegedly. Night that's so nice. Allegedly I heard like the. Guy Actually showed up and we're taking records at their files records like famous Lenny Bruce. Martin Muller Records. Oh that's funny. I wish Frank Fontaine songs I sing on their Jackie gleason. Joe. Hi You. CARE and. Then Foster Brooks. On. A destroyed. Now. Try To do a Jong Act nowadays another one. You, know there's a lot of people that are when you get on stage. We will return to Gilbert Godfrey. Amazing Colossal podcasts but first a word from our sponsor Bob, how you enjoying being podcast. It I. Love It. I, guess I'm thirty six episodes in something that. I love doing it and it's doing well and I'm lucky to have my friends on. which I understand why you don't want to be on a Gilbert and You're also dispensing advice to the public. which whatever they want to talk about. You know sometimes it's advice sometimes it's just. A just trying to make them feel good because life's not easy. You know so I'm trying to help. And whenever can and I have conversations a lot it's not funny. It's just conversations because a lot of people that are lonely and. I've just been reaching out. Of course. stamos. Was My first guest was audio only now at Zoom and then I put up on I don't put it up, they put it up on a youtube page I never had. A Youtube Page Gilbert. Oh I've got all those things and. Look at it. He's on trade talk. Yeah. I might talk to. My thirteen year old daughter is in. The Youtube people give nice comments like. I, hate both of you. I WANNA delete them, but it's like I don't have time for that. You this let them be morons or. JUST WEIRD STUFF CASANOVA GETS POLITICAL BECAUSE I won't be Goldberg as a guest. So they're like they don't they all we talked about what's wrong with the world why can't people this love each other and people don't want to hear that you can't say why can't people love each other go fuck you. Outraged the. Conversation so I'm just trying to do whatever I can last question for me. Bob Bill Cosby actually advise you to not work. So blue. Go Yeah he always. He always did. But I got it out on stage and he got it out and people's faces. Do Do you know anything about? I'll yes this one of the writers of the Cosby show when I was when I did a guest. told me that cosby had it in his schedule that an hour was set aside did teach comedy to Asian models. But that makes sense that that sounds. Here, that's why you hear. So many Asian girls gone. Wrong. I. My friend. Over You know when you see pictures of him now he doesn't look happy I don't understand. Any idolized him. That's the weirdest part. I really did look up to him when he was on I spy was his with his albums. Influence you know I started cleaner, and then I don't know what happened I kind of blew up by TV imager did more what I did before I got. Family shows and I still my I guess my ex less blue than it used to be a the air my act whatever I'm rolling right now and stand up is not as blue Trying to do what? I find funny and I tell stories and I love a good deal I mean who doesn't? WanNa. We also want to thank you for being part of our sixth anniversary show with your nice video congratulations that you sent. Then Oh that was really heartfelt but I faked it I know. I. Love you Gilbert and I like you frank is an acquaintance thing. And I love Darah and I don't know Matt but I love his screensaver. Up. I wish right now Gobert is for your health and your safety and. And don't let people come over and do their nose into your mouth. Where you get it. Don't go the hospitals into the Cova testing room and get all of the swabs in south on them. I would say that'd be really stupid in dangerous or. You. Don't don't go into the intensive care and just take deep breaths and go out. You know. Do stuff like that and be safe and. All these people that don't want our mask takes their freedoms of they really should wear them because they're really ugly there. Most of I haven't seen a really good-looking person screaming about. Michelle pfeiffer complaining. Mask. And they just look really they look like one of the statues that are made tinfoil they're taken down. Why are people have said we're taking down statues that are hollow like a Easter bunny chocolate you know those hollow Easter things. Are you don't know from eastern you don't. Talk The bunny. Gilbert, do you ever eat a chocolate for the big chocolate? Easter bunnies I had the chocolate bunnies. Had the chocolate Santa clauses, and of course, the Hanukkah Gelt. Yes. Role in aluminum foil and the. Was, the outside was nice. All of them and the chocolate was the cheapest shit and the words Shit. Chocolate was made a wax. Yeah and yeah, it was I think there's Watson it not unlike those things that were filled with sugar water that were wax and kids would eat it. I remember that Your Lips That ship was in those fake. Easter Bunny. Santa. Claus when you got Santa Claus Chocolate is the first thing you would eat would be Dick. You write for Santa's ass I look out his ass all. You need is sack and swallowed toys well, first night world. My face against sent. Because so So Christmas sure that I loved him. Right Did you believe that he's not your I rubbed my face. The Heat Easter bunnies balls. because. They felt like cotton balls. Collymore worse they were. A teenager I would call a supermarket and say you, it's an old joke cotton balls. And then they would. The punchline would be that the guy was saying, who do you think I am Peter. Rabbit. For. Nobody ever finished it. Did you ever write letters to Santa as a little kid? I, hope that you could one day eat is chocolate of all. Well I was never witty I would. Say Death and say. Look Lick. This shit at Iran's all. The Santa. Santa. At the north. Pole I wouldn't worry I. Fear Bunny I'm not an idiot bunnies regan every bunny. Santa how were you? Will you wrote? Fanta I. Think I wish to. And what exactly tell me the wording out got you wrote the Santa when you were to dear Santa. Can I lick the Shit at? All. You ever answer did you get your Christmas wish we I we were at Penn Tiles. Really. So if you say perverted stuff in the letter to Santa, he writes back and then then I wrote him and said I Lick your big sack. I. Think you'll I think we're going to save this for the Christmas episode. Going to hang on. Hang on. Copy and paste. Yes only July but we'll we'll. Don't cut this from the episode. Gosh. No. These are gills we're going to plug. It's Let's let's also plug your book from two from two, thousand, fourteen which. Don't do these old credits. You're causing a lot of pain dirty daddy. Book available now on Microfiche. So. You can get where you can get Gilbert's book. And Guess Dirty Daddy's in paperbacks though and they will. We will look for the Martin Mull Doc when all this shit is over and the podcast called Bob Sagi- here for you. And that's available wherever you get your podcast. Apple or spotify, your grandmother's house, and finally, what do you know about Cesar? Romero. Mino- that my mother saw him in a parking lot and said that he hit on her on nine Jeez in the valley years ago and my mother's gone for years. But twenty five years ago she says, she saw Cesar Romero not dressed as the joker from the. Batman and he? came up to her and he was wearing a black leather jacket bobby I'm not. On, get a drink with me. So my mother apparently was attractive back then of my dad was sexually abused by Frank Gorton. Tragic Yes. Riddle me this and then what he did, but his penis and his penis shape question mark. Ask. What's your grandmother abused by David Wayne? I think you've hit a nerve. You knew that. Yeah. My Grandmother was actually David Blaine encased her in ice. SLABS OF ICE. Did Your Grandmother Ever, go down on either Julie Newmar yes. Yes. Yes. Yes she went down on my grandmother my bubby. went down on everybody. Everybody and that's how she got to America from Russia. Fuck, I forget earth that a wife who is the? Earth? Yeah I don't talk about my my. Way But? Yes. The answer. I don't I. Don't talk about it that way. What about the victims? Bueno. Buoyed Harrow. On on Batman. Question about him in my and. He called her. King King Tit. She's no more and I loved her very much. Now that we've talked about her so respectfully. Gilbert. All. I love you very much Gobert. Very, very much. Frank. I. Would say I, tolerate you. rickles would say Matt rigorous would say Matt not so much. And dare dare. I truly love you're very lucky man Gobert. You've really outdone yourself. Please don't touch her and. And you know you'll. You'll make everybody. Happy. Having more kids. All. Do Hope Sandoval will come. I. Hope Santa comes in my ass all. Ask. was. Just. Math. Fill no reasoning. All started. Humanitas prize skill. Definitely going to be the your this is going to submit one. This is a good one. But this one for the peabody. For the Peon me is. Four. Spur you're in consideration to listen to the shit give our best to Michael O. to Bob I will and Gobert. I hope you get what you want for Christmas. What would that be be? Santa's what. I would like I. I don't WanNA, keep saying it over and over and over. Shows, includes that normally not me? You ruined my reputation that others. I would like Santa shop his cock. Mike Astle and common my ass for Christmas not the other holiday, the other holidays rates. Would you want the else? It'd be like. Holing you're holding something you think. I would like to show up all of the else ach centers has. Their big the hurt. And While Chevy Nam. Appeal. I want said to. Haul all. Does. It sounds like Ed McMahon. Jolly Jolly. While you're shoving elves of as asphalt. Ship. Reindeer. How route got that read knows. He was the last one out. It made a sound there was like. It was like a suction. Out there was when that reindeer came out of Santa's Asshole it was like the day the clown cried. That Analogy Bob. Thank you. Well Happy Christmas. Thank you so. These snobby. Yeah, and we'll save your list. There's I. Hope they're alive by the time this is released. This was like a Perry Como Christmas special. Really it was like match very much. Being gross be by the fireplace. Grow his children into. I hear he was a Good Dad Oh God. I don't know if that's true every. I don't think that's true. I think there's just like now so much tabloid stuff I think shadow know someone has. was talking to Buddy Hackett. About, being cross we and Bing crosby say. You WanNa know you are now like being. Pink. Cake because being quietly clicking Gerhard. Without. I think people that do abuse people are because they have a sexual problems. I would think. So they're angry about something maybe they heard this podcast maybe. Hate to. Listen to this and then go beat someone I. Hope Not. All right you've. Heard. I've got. That'd be a good song right now he's done. He's saying his. Just before we leave I, just want to ask one more time to their any other wishes that you would have win. Santa. Comes down your chimney. I like like making Gilbert. Laugh. I'd like best what would be the most dramatic exciting thing Santa could do for you for Christmas. Well, I love dish out. And this mouth 'cause he's got that big beer. Show they would feel like I which fucking midst. But you wouldn't want to touch Mrs Claus you. Just. WanNa. Do it to Santa. Yes. Yes, I am. Self respect. Right okay and. I was GONNA save more of the the ten days of twelve days honecker. I don't know. All the children are snuggled like sugar plums. You don't want that I'm standing in the house. I. I'd like him to lick my sugar plums. You'd like you would like Santa Teabag us. I. Hope. Gill. You might want a disclaimer on the end. This. This podcast is not for everyone and then dot dot dot wait for. One last thing what would be your favorite. Christmas. Most Per You would make the happiest on on. Christmas. I wake up Chris you wake up. Christmas morning and. Santa. It's squatting up my face. Taking our tremendous shit up eight. After eating the thousand Candy Canes. Thousand. What candy. Case. That's that's the one. WHO When he's done is gone on his sleigh yelling merry. Tastes. Lance log of shit comes out. He goes merry Christmas to all. To all the good. So They. tied. Logs. HAPP. Well before we go, we want to thank our sponsor hallmark. Thank. God. What if Santa was constipated, not be able to get your Christmas. You were on vacation with baths and it was Christmas time because some people in show business gone up to the say Kobe over two years from now you're on vacation you're just a to you and a beautiful romantic spot and Santa Shows What would be your Christmas wish at that moment on your beautiful Christmas vacation. Well, I I'd say Sate Nick, would you like to take some laxatives dot? then. Them hold it in actual. Possible. Showing. Asset. Gilbert. Does. Something explosive that happens. It would come blasting out. That's not the reindeer all it's his propulsion. Diarrhea and Shit. What's So all the houses are covered as he flies off into the night. Somebody's gotTa edit all this together. I don't think editing required people. A couple of pounds shit. I, Love You Gilbert and thank you Franken. Thank you Darren. Thank you. It was a pleasure being part of your spectacular soup. About guys you? Got To. Say that good nights and then if you could do an idea for us. Ok. Well, I'm Gilbert Godfrey Been Gilbert Godfrey JR amazing colossal. With my co hosts Frank Santo. Padre we been talking. Man whose jerks off incentive. Beard. Scott. Different doing different. The evolve Senate. Nineteen. Ninety. Go ahead and come on. It's Christmas in in in July and August. One more. Oak. And then Bob. Do. Nice. Promo for us. Oh, it's going to be is. We've been. Fucking we've, been talking about jagged. Thank you Bob Thank you my God we're all going to prison. That's all. Around on this show. Show. Sean. Red. Cap On his head. Of Cast. Pretty Sad. Speed. This big. Sounds like. Claw. Grow. Careful site. Rain. Fast. Survey. Run. surprised. Donald. Shown by. Da.

Gilbert Rodney Dangerfield Don rickles Bob Frank Goshen Bob You Norman Lear Bob Yeah Gilbert Godfrey Niches Gilbert Gilbert Godfried director Bob That Dean Martin Mike twitter Jeff Arlen Denzel Washington Jimmy He John Johnny Carson
The Rodney Dangerfield Problem

Android Central Podcast

1:08:59 hr | 5 months ago

The Rodney Dangerfield Problem

"It is Friday. May Eight th twenty twenty my name. Is Daniel Baiter? This is the android central podcasts. This week joining us again. Back with some art are you. Are you in the Polar Vortex Jerry? I don't even not even know it reached that far south. Wasn't that a movie with Tom. Hanks yes. I'm pretty sure Tom. Hanks's run the gamut of every weather related movie in history. But Are you? Are you leaving freezing right now? Because its freezing here in. Toronto is like seventy yesterday. And it's like seventy below today. I think that's unacceptable world. Come on already dealing with enough as it is. And I'm so pleased to welcome. Back Martin. Bart's tech alter is as you may know him on the Internet Back to the show. Martin how are you man? I'm doing great. No polar vortex over here. We have very good western Berlin. I don't actually think you've ever had a polar vortex in Europe. That's I don't think that's the thing that you have. I remember one so it could be possibly it means it's basically when the jet stream brings a bunch of Arctic air and has it sit on top of your face for a couple of weeks and then we get unseasonably cold weather in May where it snows in New England. And I think it's the coldest it's ever been in parts of Alabama right now in. May It's it's very strange if you WANNA learn more about it. The Washington Post had a really good explainer on what it is but I wanted to ask you. How's how's life in Berlin? I feel like you guys must be out of the worst of it. Since you had a quick A relatively quick flattening of the curve over there. Yeah I think compared to the rest of the world We're doing okay People certainly don't seem to be too stressed. About Dependent mckinney more. People are out in about a stores have started opening. So you can actually unless the story is very big you can actually just go in and and Shop you have to wear masks In Public Transport and in stores but life is slowly returning to normal. So not too bad. And what does that look like? From a just from a bureaucracy perspective are people still being tested. Is there still community spread or is that largely finished now? People are definitely still being tested. I think Germany has one of the highest testing rates per capita of I think almost all the countries in the world at least the big developed ones and there. They continued to do quite a lot of testing but they weren't any huge Problems with the healthcare system. The there were no big spikes and the emergency rooms so generally speaking the healthcare system didn't collapse really anywhere so I think in general life is just slowly returning to normal. There's testing and that's really good news. It's quite stark seeing the The number of cases in verses its per capita death rate compared to other countries like Italy Spain the US Canada basically every other country in the world's Germany seems to have done a really good job. Keeping everybody your most people who was infected with the virus alive which is a testament to the healthcare system for sure. Yeah and I think it's there's two factors the one that you've said there's the healthcare system was working quite well. Nothing the other one is that they did a lot of testing and they did a lot of contact. Tracing quite early so probably. The reported number of cases is actually is way closer to the reality than in most countries. So you just see like you see lower rate because you just have a more more accurate number That you comparing to the number of cases is more accurate. That's actually a really good point because the numbers that we see when we go to our local newspaper websites and check the daily case rates. It's it's basically reflective of just how many how many tests been able to perform rather than the reality of how many people are infected except in some countries like Germany and South Korea. So Amazing Amazing News. I'm really glad to hear that everybody's most people are doing well and that you're safe and healthy. I wanted to bring you on the show. Because you're celebrating. Something Pretty Momentous this week you launched your first. App called crowd and it is a i. Guess a crowd source smartphone review evaluation quite QNA Faq B. R. B. W. T. F. You know APP and I. I would love to hear a bit more about it because it's something you discuss the last time you were on the show in January and I guess back then it was still in sort of earlier Alpha stage. But you've now launched an open Beta. Anybody can downloaded with an and request a an invite code so tell us about what crowd is and why you think it's important for the market right now. The crowd is It's an android APP for an hour going to bring it to us on the web at some point as well but it's an android happened. I guess the the concept is to give Tech enthusiasts black ourselves a place where they can review a the gadgets that they own. That's not only for smartphones. You can also review. I don't know what your Vr headset. Your drone your Google home Stuff so you can review all the gadgets that you own. We've developed a whole Mechanics how reviews work on platform as as opposed to other crowdsourced review platforms. Because we think that they're quite clunky and we don't realize how they work and of course you can Find a lot of reviews from from other tech enthusiasts. We've been out for about a a week and that the response has I think has been overwhelmingly a positive. I mean if I if I expected X. amount of excitement we got tax so people have been really really Excited about it and I guess the the concept of of crowd is that there really isn't Currently I think a good place for for for tech enthusiasts to foot for the community that we have to kind of Voice their opinion and to to let them have an avenue where they can review the products that that the that the own end and to vote about which products they like in which ones they don't like and we would like to build that community for them. So I just wanted to publicly hold you accountable for my inevitable job loss. Because this is completely unacceptable. Martin I don't. I don't like where this is going. No I think I think it's amazing. I think the democratization of product evaluation needed to happen. It's happened through the comments and through forums. Those as you said are credibly. Clunky what was the I mean you? You mentioned that previous examples of this were really bad. But what was the impetus for building this particular product in this way as a mobile APP rather than a mobile website or sort of as a some other form that could've taken On on maybe a different platform so the reason we chose to go with a android is simply because most of my viewers are using android phones. I think it's about eighty percent and obviously our audiences are first user. Basil just made sense to develop something for the majority of my audience But yeah so what we wanted to achieve of. This was the the original idea for crowd. L. Standing in a store trying to buy a product specifically an ST card for my camera. And trying to figure out if like which one of these St Cards. I have to buy. That would be fast enough for my camera and it took me. I don't know twenty thirty minutes of research store on my phone. I was just so annoyed why I couldn't ask people who own this camera would have been such an easy easy answer and this is kind of where we realized that. There's there's a lot missing from the review experience online. For the one part I think Professional reviewers like yourselves or like youtubers. I don't do many reviews but youtubers like me. We can only cover so many products are we can cover the latest iphones delayed. Samsung phones. Delayed US job. Bre Headsets and whatever but there's a lot that we can't properly cover And we also thought that the the people can cover it so the actual owners and the community. Their current is so clunky. Like if you go if you go to an Amazon store listing for example. You have five thousand reviews. You're never going to get what those five thousand people are saying. Because it's just five thousand little pieces of taxi it's never to. Never GonNa read. It doesn't add up to anything. You can't easily scan it. You can't interact with it instantly. It's I feel like it's a very old school and solution. Basically just give people an open field and then let them do whatever so what we want to do is to break review down to its core components and to make those really easy to both supply and and to to define what you're looking for so we have currently two main things you can do on the APP one. You can give a star ratings on different features of a product so for example depending on what product is that say you have a VR headset? You can read it Based on very specific criteria that has relative. Vr headsets. Like how accurate does the Han tracking? How accurate is the head tracking if it has a battery? How good is the battery? How good is the field of you? And you can rate these It becomes quantifiable. So so you can see from the five thousand users how many people thought that The field of view was great. How many of them had durability issues? How many of them thought that. The cable broke easily and so on and so forth. And so you get a very quick nice overview at where having more people actually makes the review experience better and the to go back to my original question you can ask people you can ask owners real questions and a the what we working up to to get you. A answers Hopefully are are to get at least ten answers From owners an under a minute so basically you can ask. Is this the card fast enough for my camera? You send it off than the owners get notification and right from the notification they can just tap yes or no on the notification. They don't even have to open the APP. And this gives you such quick feedback. We've actually test this. We now have We were very selective on of who we've let into the APP so far so we have a fairly small user base We have we already have forty thousand answers and people are like incredibly engaged an incredibly quick to answer and and it really works that if you pick a product that This relatively small user base actually owns Then then you you can. You can really just ask a question and the answer comes back you can just see the answers pouring in said really makes it easier for you to make a purchase decision to decide what's good and what's not and this way. We hope that we'll be able to cover all the products that are on the market. And not just you know whatever is worth reviewing for a professional reviewer. So I'm curious what you've seen. I mean you've done reviews but you're you also watch. I assume a lot of youtube videos of product you read. I assume a lot of quote professional reviews although a lot of our listeners may dispute that we are professionals they take issue with what we say time which is fine. Because they're they're reviews are subjective and and that's the way it'd be but how are you seeing the priorities of your user base right now as difference to what you typically see from somebody who maybe does this for a living and may be a little bit if not jaded than than somewhat ambivalent about what they're reviewing because they do it so often? I mean one of the clear things that we see is that that there's there's one more thing that I think. Professional reviewers are typically not very well not very good at doing and that is giving you a long-term perspective about a product so there are these like after the buzz and and everybody calls it something else you know like re review one year later or whatever but it's it's hard to get a consistently clear idea about how a product has aged and and we are coming to to build up more features in the future that that make it really obvious whether a product is not just interesting as it launches but whether it gets good software support whether it breaks whether it is durable whether it is still a good investment later down the line so I think that's that's one thing and then the second thing is I feel like I feel like we tech reviewers. We live in a little bit of a bubble and we we kind of parrot each other. I think a lot of it even with the best intentions. You basically think that the community things a certain thing. Something is important. Another thing is not important and then I think we all just assumed that this is relevant and now we go along in these These are generally assumed directions. And one of the things. I hope that the community will show is what the community really cares about. So like you'll actually be able to see okay. Which aspect of a product is important to the People? In which aspect is not. I have a very different approach to reviews than say Jerry. I have a very different approach to reviews than say Andrew or Alex or anybody else on my team. I love that it does come down to individual preference but you know what I've always found really interesting especially about these umbrella. Brands like android central. Is that when I personally review a Galaxy S. twenty on a c? I'm personally reviewing it. But it comes to represent the entire brands opinion of this product. What I what I love about crowd. Is that eventually with enough data points. It doesn't matter because it just kind of equals out over time right if you are able to break down. These certain categories. Somebody who really really cares about. The camera will be able to filter for devices that prioritize camera features are particular camera features over battery life for display size or something like that. What's the evolution of the community or or the APP the community within the APP? Say a year from now once you hit a critical mass of users. What would your ideal relationship be with that community? And how do you see that may be impacting? The the way that a typical android central reader or youtube watcher will will make buying decisions if crowd gets large enough that it's also just a defacto choice in how people decide what to buy what what what. I'd like crowd to be in a year. I have many ideas and many wishes and many dreams. We'll see which of them actually come true but The first thing I would love to first of all build up a really good product database. That would be kind of the the number one step and we are actually working. This very hard I think one of the core like kind of infrastructure layer things that is missing from the product review and the product buying and discussion. Experience is to just have a really nice free easily understandable well categorized reporter. Terry all the products where you can see you know when it was released What the SPECS are what other devices? It is connected to. I always have this pet peeve that no maybe some of the devices like phones they have like you know. You have sites like You know. Gsm Marina or whatever that have an okay database. Actually pretty decent database. But I'd just like to have an even better database and for all the gadgets As a as a foundation and I see this as a as a wikipedia like project Especially based on on the feedback from our users. So far we have since we've launched the APP We create our product database manually. So my co founder and I we just input things into databases find images but we've received I think while over eight hundred product requests from people so far and we have people who are like very actively now monitoring whenever a new phone comes out whenever new earphones from a particular brand Kamat. And whatever so we plan to to you know together with the community at build out a system that where where this stays up to date and relevant and and well connected 'em and then We would actually not really like to replace professional reviews. I think you are hinting at this. A little bit but really we think that it would be a really nice compliment to it So We want to create two things that I think would be really useful for For publishes like yourself one is kind of to to give the the ability to expose our day die into let's say embedded in an article of yours or in your forum where you can for example say. Hey we're doing a review Here's our opinion of it. And by the way you can see you can see what the community thinks of it. And then this could be embedded into either articles of publishers or on posts or on social media basically to become like a source of truth. For what the community thinks of any particular aspect of any particular product? Then we Would like to Go past reviews so we would also like to let people like we'd like to turn this APP into a sort of news feed almost so you you you Pick which devices you own. What product categories? You're interested in and then you could bring in articles from let's say android central or or whatever publication into newsfeed. We already have a sort of newsfeed And then you could. You could follow stuff there And we would like to people also express their opinion on products that they don't own yet Not In a form of a review but in a form of let's say You can vote on. How exciting you think newly released product is or if there's a leak would you like this or would you like that you like curve screens and general or not That sort of stuff so a lot of news and community engagement stuff and then hopefully making that data really well-structured and really Easy to digest and also to to Exposed to external places. You can you can see it. Not just on crowd but you can see it on in an article somewhere and so on. I'm not sure if I've answered the question but those are th that's amazing. I mean that's really ambitious. I'd love to learn. I mean this will obviously play out and we'll have you on the show again once the Wants a bit more mature and perhaps once it's public but I you know before we move on I just want to ask do you have monetization plans if If if you can talk about them like what would your ideal way be of earning money from this as it ad based as it partnering with? Oem's is it sponsored. Placements is it. You know all number of is charging for access to the API so that you can embed widgets on webpages. Do you need me to be your business manager because I could help joking but all of these like there are so many potential ways to make money on an APP like this and and yet it's so intrinsically difficult to make money from any APP That I I wonder what your what your current plans are for that. We've had all the all the same ideas that you've just listed here And honestly I wouldn't really pick one. That will be the one that we go with because honestly we'd have to Simply try what works what doesn't work and and and we really want to make sure that of course. This is a community approach so we really want to make sure that the community feels like they're not being taken advantage of or or not Selling their private purchasing data to whoever or we really want to make sure that they feel like our monetization model doesn't hurt them. And and hopefully factually makes makes life better for them. But we we're we're playing around with all of those options and one one of the easiest initial thoughts that we have and again It'S UP FOR DEBATE. An for testing But but the initial idea that we have is that people have already asked us why there isn't a purchase button in the APP. So let's say you find the perfect pair of headphones You've gone through all the reviews now. He's decided that this is what what you want. Why not you know. Give you a a a a place to link to. I don't know Amazon or your local retailer and then you have an affiliate Business Model So that could be a base because that that is actually something people have already requested. So we're we're looking at it and we'll see we'll see how that goes and then we're also looking at a lot of other monetization methods we're thinking off some kind of premium subscription Possibly if if people feel that the That that the would want to support the community and they would want to avoid having other monetization. What else that as an option at honestly it's all on the our. Our current goal is just to make sure that we have we nailed the engagement and the the the product review experience and will will Think about desertion afterwards. Yeah so where can people find the APP and get an invite and all that good stuff you can go to crowd dot com so cr are. Wd Dot Com. That's just crowd with two ours and they'll be downloading for android there if you're an IOS user. There's the sign up link for waiting there and to get an invite. It's also on the crowd website but crowd dot com slash. Invite is is an easy way to to find it and basically concept with the invite system is that we wanted to make sure that the people who join the community at least in the early stages are a little bit vetted. We don't want just anybody to come. In and spam stuff end and write reviews of products that That don't know much about so. There's kind of knowledge quiz. You actually have to just push it out today than is Friday. When we record this podcast. It's actually people really to like it just as a quiz in general. That's so funny it's like an it's basically like a A little test people like it because it proves to you that they're worthy of being on your platform. Yeah it's hopefully good for everybody but there's a it's we just tried it out today and we plan to refresh it every couple of days. So the questions are always current and stuff and The concept is that there are twenty questions you have to get at least fifteen of them right in five minutes and if you do will email you a code with an invite. We'll email union by. Why appreciate that? I didn't have to do the test. I feel like I cheated. Influence our man no. I've never been caught one of those before but I know Jerry's an influencer word. You may be a bad influence. You're still an influencer. WanNa shift the topic a little bit. Just this got my mind thinking to something. I wanted to talk about later in the show but I wanNA push it up because you were mentioning that. There's this there's this inherent to the way that professional and I keep I don't WanNa you can't see me quoting. But I will continue to say professional reviewers and how we decide what to review and the industry in many ways. The reviews industry in many ways is broken. And it's a it's broken in ways that I know it. It rewards access that rewards reinforcements rewards bigger brands with bigger marketing budgets. It it does all the things that are gross and you know we play part where where part of that structure where we reinforce the system because we obviously want to be given access to the embargoes that other sites do because you lose out if you don't but what you mentioned is that it really does lower or suppress the number of devices products from smaller companies from companies. That are that don't have the same marketing budgets that or just products. That aren't as North American focused at least for for sites like ours that have a very large. Us readership and I talk about this. In context of catalysts report that was issued this morning about the top ten global smartphones in Q. One so this is between January first and March thirty first sold all over the world and while this is just one report from one company it sheds light on just how different the market is from. How perhaps we internally think of it and how. We discuss it publicly on the site the best-selling Iphone as the best selling phone in the world in Q. Was The iphone eleven with about eighteen million units. That's not a surprise. What was the surprise? Was that the number two. The second best mark selling smartphone was the read me note. Eight and eight t from Xiaomi and combined with the red meat not a pro which also sold around six million units. That's fourteen million units of a smartphone. That really most people outside of India and perhaps parts of Europe have never heard of and we'll never get a chance to buy at it just speaks to how different the market is in various in various countries. And how much influence a company like me in in certain parts of the world and how little influence they have in others other other interesting notes. The galaxy fifty-one one from Samsung was the third selling smartphone in the world and Q. On with around six million units Just over six million six and a half million the galaxy eight ten s which is a budget phone around one hundred and fifty dollars The Galaxy Eight twenty s galaxy as zero one These are all phones that are sort of trickling into North America. Europe because there's just so much price sensitivity right now around flagships and we we've spoken about how five G. has necessitated this massive year-over-year jump in in smartphone prices. But I'd love to hear your take on this Martin because You know Germany just as market is a very different one from where I am and where Jeremy Jerry is so what. What do you see as the dominant narrative around smartphones today in Western Europe? Who HAS A big question? I I mean definitely. Europe is like one of the big trends Europe seeing the rise of show me I think they just became the leading brand in Spain and they're think already number number four and western Europe I read on a great side cold android central Dot Com. And so that that is that is definitely a big trend. I I think the the new iphones have been doing really well here But but yeah the the. The mid range phones are are. Are seeing a resurgence for sure. The a-series galaxy phones. I've seen a lot of people with Pixel threes which This is the first time I see normal. People with Pixel phones in Germany. Didn't see any any flexing pixels before unless they were gadget nerds. So yeah I think I think the mid ranges and they I guess with the IPHONE. Se It's going to be the same same thing. We're going to see a lot of entering funds coming Jerry. I mean you've talked a lot about this. This trend and the necessary change that We're going to see Samsung's obviously trying harder than any other company to bring its mid range of budget phones into new markets to offset some of the price increases that the galaxy s twenty series has. We've just this week. We saw the galaxy fifty-one launched in the US. Widely the galaxy seventy one five G. is launching in June. The very cheap budget phones like the galaxy a zero one the Galaxy a eleven eight twenty one. Those are all coming to the US at some point this year What's your take on on? Unlike the the upper limit on what most people are going to be willing to spend on a phone now that there's so much pressure on their budgets you know thanks to the pandemic I think the biggest thing there is people are not going to buy right now. I think that's GonNa be the standout saying you know I. I love the see companies. Big and small offer good products for less money. That's that's really my in. You know that's my thing but right now when money is tight I think the first thing you have to consider that people just aren't going to buy at all. How much is this is GonNa roll over? When we don't have twenty million unemployed people in North America and they're you know we do have more. Disposable income are people still going to be value conscious because of what they've recently been through. I think that's a bigger story and I think the answer is yes and Samsung is going to realize that it needs to offer four hundred dollar smartphones seven hundred dollars smartphones in tandem with eleven hundred dollars smartphones. Or IT'S GONNA lose a lot of market share to the first Asian company that can get in huge with carriers to make sure their phone is on every shelf in every store so this brings us to you know back to the story about Pixel for a we We're going to jump into the delay in the android eleven Beta next. But you know I can't. We can't talk about it without talking about the phone. That's supposed to be announced. Her was supposed to be announced at Google. Io which was supposed to happen next week We're seeing so many leaks suggesting that the pixel four is imminent right. We've heard this over and over again that it may happen as soon as next week or by the end of. May It'll be in stores by the beginning of June It's possible that it'll be announced. The day that the Beta drops them on June third. But that's three ninety nine price point anecdotally we heard that was the real benefit of the. Pixel three right is that gave you ninety percent of the Pixel three and in some ways it was a better experience on the Pixel three for half the price and that seems to be what people are willing to spend right. Now I agree I I think the for a I mean. We've basically seen some of those photos of the boxes. Are you know. They're not sitting in a warehouse there in the back of best buy so the phone is the launch is imminent And I really think it's GonNa come in at the same price as the three just from some rumors. I've heard if so that's that's a huge win and we're going to see you know some financial success as far as you know it sales so you've also made it clear on the website that you'd like Google to experiment with Building its own chips that it might be a better idea down the road to kind of own the whole stack the way that apple does the meantime. Why DOESN'T GOOGLE PARTNER WITH MEDIA TECH TO PRODUCE? Pixel that is considerably cheaper than the ones that they produce today even potentially cheaper than the than the three or four a series expand on that. Thought because you know Mediatek just announced a newer updated version of the density. One thousand flagship. Sec that they announced I think it was in January at cs but there are no phones at currently support it and the the older Mediatek chips are not great there. Pretty far behind qualcomm In terms of performance to to price ratio right now all we can do is look at it on paper because as you said there there are no phones with a democracy. You know I don't know. Did the update the numbers? It's still the density one thousand density one thousand plus it supports a hundred and forty four hertz displays and faster ram configurations but otherwise. It's the same chip. Yeah see on paper. That chip is going to perform. You know in in the same ballpark as the latest snapdragon in some places it. It does things a little better in other places. It's not going to be good but it's going to be you know relatively equal on paper. I you know we need to see it in a phone to know how true that is. And if Google is building their own chip that they they need to find ways to move away from qualcomm for the our F- Stack and all the other things or ways to integrate qualcomm 's our f into a custom chip right. Now is a great time to try the MEDIATEK. A six your phone will be three hundred dollars cheaper. It can still have five G. And if everything mediatek says is true which is a big if it's going to perform just as well a pixel five we. We are under the assumption that it's going to have a snapdragon seven sixty five in which I think is a smart move but maybe a smarter move would have been have a dementia thousand plus Martin. I'd love to know I keep waiting for Media Tech the habits. Amd moment where it kind of jumps into know dump jumps from a budget spoke exclusively sort of a budget solution for Oem's that don't want to. That are more price sensitive and more region locked into a a true qualcomm. Competitor doesn't seem to have happened yet and I'd love to know your take on whether you think it's possible mediatek could or Wiltz it make that jump at some point. Yeah I was looking at this density one thousand chip as well an and I think I had my thought. Was that like on paper. It looked so good. There must be something wrong with the either like they have. Problems manufacturing at a large quantities. They couldn't couldn't get the quality assurance right to the they had. They had defective products or like something in the process. Had to be go wrong because obviously people would like to like would like to have alternatives to a single supplier. And I'd be surprised if companies like Google wouldn't pick them up on their chip just to kick start their ecosystem and to kick some competition if it was a viable option so it means that probably it is not a viable option otherwise companies like Google have already started using them. So I think Maybe they're just not quite there in their technology stack or in their manufacturing where caucus. Yeah I mean. Nobody's where qualcomm isn't that that's by design. There's there's a lot we've set in in the past about call comes close to monopolistic hold on the smartphone market in North America and all of their patents that require carriers to use their five G. And LCD starting with CD May and now five G. Patents and You know we don't want to retread that that that that really You know well worn discussion but I do think it's worth pointing out that I would love to see a real competitor especially with Samsung leaving the custom chip space with walkway or high silicon. Being sort of stymied by the entity list and not really being allowed to to work with with. Us companies anymore Although I do believe that their relationship with arm has not it stalled for a little bit but that it it started up again when are basically decided that they did not have any US dependencies. That would prevent it from from working with with high silicon. So I want to shift the discussion a little bit to the delay and android eleven. So Jerry we've been waiting for this day and it was supposed to happen next week at Google. I O obviously Google has now been canceled and Google said that due to the complexity of trying to work from home and all the engineers trying to work independently from home. They're going to be delaying ANDROID LEVINS Beta launch until June. Third two weeks later but in an extra developer preview released yesterday or two days ago days anymore and those you know the people who are on the developer preview including our our own. You know high out Houston and Alex Toby. They're telling us that it's pretty stable at this point that it's not it doesn't feel like it's disastrous to use it as a daily driver as it was during the first and second developer previous. What's your take on the the Beta it's going to be launched in a live stream? Dave BURKES GONNA go on stage from Google. Campus socially distanced from the assume the film crew and the very limited number of people that'll be in his vicinity. It's going to be called the Beta launch. Show and there's going to be Acuna. There's going to be a mini. Iot No but just focused on android. What what do you think's going to come of this? And and what are you most looking forward to about the android eleven Beta this year. Well I I hope they fill the seats with robots. I mean this is Google so cool but I I really think once we all heard about the difficulties in working from home and all this. I think that's like codes. Speak for. Yeah we're all working decentralized and there was this big bug we had to fix and we didn't find it in time because we're all decentralized so here's the new developer preview hopefully with that bug fixed and we're going to push back up public facing Beta for another month while we test it which makes perfect sense and you cannot. I mean you can't be angry about that you know. They're all working from home and sharing code with each other in sitting in playing on. Hang out and meet and not getting their work done in the same way they were before so things are going to slip through. And you know the good news is if I'm correct and I did software development for living for a while and I I. I'm pretty sure I'm correct here They they caught it. So that's good. You know delayed until June third It's it's really. How many days is that delayed? We don't know what was supposed to be coming in. May is now coming in June the very beginning of June. I think people are making a big deal about nothing here. This is just how for development works. We would all love to see a public Beta with consumer facing changes that we think are really cool or that we really eight on. You know our old pixels right now. We all would love to have that but we don't. We have to wait another twenty some odd as for it. We can wait what I'm most excited to see. I'm I'm really loving though the push towards one time permissions Those are essential completely agree. Security is first off it should not be up to the users you have to stop thinking is stupid users doing stupid things Because that means somebody is enabling a user to do a stupid thing and that means the user isn't stupid. It's Google responsibility to let us manage our privacy and security easily and one time permissions is it. That's so basic. You have to wonder why were on the eleventh of Android and we're now seeing you know them start to get a little bit more. I don't know what word to use popular a little bit more in use throughout the operating system. I don't care about whatever changes they're going to bring to the notifications and you know they will. I really don't care about their messaging strategy. I use signal. I don't care about of that. I care that users now have an easier way to manage their own privacy insecurity. And that's what's important so I'll give you a bit of a different question Martin You mentioned you are also looking forward to one time permissions with android eleven. What do you think that android ten lacks that you really want Google to bring to Andrew Levin that hasn't announced yet like what would what would your ideal android eleven look like If you had your way with its design or or are you pretty happy with the direction it's going. I actually think that a pretty good place I think more more work on permissions As is required. But I see that they're doing it with each new update that is definitely my biggest pet peeve and I think doing decently good job at it so I'm I'm generally speaking happy with the direction. What further using right now a curiosity I am using the galaxy note ten The smaller version. Because I can't get used to like super huge and do use the stylus for anything. Yes you do. I have a surface as well. So I have a stylus and both my and my phone and I draw storyboards for example for my editor for Takata and I also sketch out a lot of ideas for For crowd I with a digital pen. Either on my surface or on my note no ten and it's You know just to get like if I have an idea all my God. We have to put this button here or we have to re size that or like. What if what if you collected feedback in this way or that way I can just I realize that you can just take out the The pen and then start drawing on the screen and I don't have to find an APP to put it in whatever just safe and I get back to it whenever any two. So are you one of those people that prefers written notes to oneself over typing on a virtual keyboard? No no no I don't I never right. I content right. I have like ten years. I'm just sketching things out. So basically I'm sketching out fake screen specifically lines and yeah exactly. I'm sure it's great to be able to like say that your your crowd APP. Take a screen shot and then whip the pen out and actually redraw top of that screen. Shot charges that you see in your mind. That's gotta be really useful. That is yes very much and I I I mean I really liked that. The no ten has screen recording built in. I find it very weird. That's one thing I would like to add. Just like a built built in screen recording feature like I think that's on the docket if mistaken it's in the current developer previews on it works pretty good. You'll like it okay. Yeah so I I liked it very much because whenever we work without developers. I mean. It's whatever you give feedback. It's either in the form of screen shots videos and it's super useful to be able to draw on top two inches do it natively and abide away. F- If I'm allowed to plug one more we're looking for one more developer. So if you're if you're working with a reactive native or No Jess then Write us at jobs at crowd that come we want we want your CV with two RS. Cress correct jobs as always want to make sure that's in there and I love the. I love the note ten. I have to say the smaller one. I still use it from time to time. It's just a beautifully made phone. It's perfect size. I just think a other than the fact that the the power buttons on the left side I think Samson nailed it. I want to ask about the. Lg Velvet because that phone has been teased in teased and then LG released unveiled at first South Korea. earlier this week and this is a brand new design for. Lg really kind of goes back to a more one. Hand friendly teardrop kind of Influence is quote inspired by nature. Which is actually I think. Not a great corollary because it it brings my mind back to the the galaxy S. three it's like raindrops sounds which nobody should ever have to hear again. I want to know what your what your thoughts are on the strategy. I mean this is not an expensive phone by modern standards. Around seven hundred thirty. Us dollars if you convert from Korean won- it's one of the first phones to run a snap driven seven sixty five rather than the eight sixty five eight gigs of Ram one hundred. Twenty two point. One storage Triple camera setup on the back including a forty eight megapixel trimbe primary camera an ultra wide and a depth No telephoto Forty three hundred million of our battery and I sixty eight water resistance. It's got active. Stylus support just like V. Sixty which is very cool. And there's a three point five millimeter headphone Jack. Jerry's very happy about that. So what what do you think is this? Is this enough for L. Is this just another kind of bump in the road is it? Is it going to turn their fortunes around? What do you think is is going to happen here? You guys are also thinking that this is going to replace the g series correct. We think so. This is probably they're going to have visas. Which is their high end flagship. All whatever and then they have like an almost flak ship more design focus g series which has developed now correct. That's your you're taking. Yeah I definitely I agree with that. Yeah well I agree. I think that DAB on its own is a good idea like I think given how many given the volumes of algae. I don't think that they need to you. Know flagships with the same processor for for one year so it would make sense to to separate the two and then to to really give both like a reason for existence so You know the the enthusiasts can have the TV series and then the that The I guess the regular people care more about design and and and hopefully Polish. Because I think that kind of seems to be what they're going forward to make the phone like pretty and nice versus just like throwing all the specs in there I think I think it makes sense in general separate those two. I think I think the phone visually looks much better than any recent. Lg phone at least from the series. I thought that the G eight and G S excellent whatever. The old looked rather clunky. And I think I think we geeks like to at not realize how much a product looking pretty matters to people so I I. I think I think it's not a not a bad idea to revamp their design and I think it looks. Looks like a no ten a Sony or whatever but I I think it looks definitely more definitely nicer than previous. Lg phones. I just I wonder whether that price tag is is still going to be a problem for them. It's not a flagship anymore Not a full flagship anymore. and I feel like I feel like for four seven hundred dollars having a a phone. There's plenty of phones with snapdragon. Eight hundred series in that price winter reading. So I think it's going to be a little tough but I like it more than their latest G. series phone so I'm hoping that it will bring them some improvement. I think you nailed it. Yeah I agree Jerry I want. I want you to finish that thought but I thought the g eight was a great phone. I actually liked it a lot. I thought the the depth sensing time of flight sensors on the front that allowed you to kind of claw and it you know whatever it was called like the feature was underwhelming but the idea was there and I think. Lg Does that a lot where it has really good tech demos. That don't translate. It's really flushed out Features and the V. series. I just think goes with brute force and it does a really good job and I. I had one on the show a couple of weeks ago. some gadget guy and we were talking about why people are so passionate about. Lg and it just comes down to the fact that like as you said at the beginning They get a bad rap in the media. And I think I posted something online yesterday on twitter about how people are upset that. Lg doesn't get the same respect. It's kind of a Rodney dangerfield problem right that. L. D. doesn't get the same respect as as Samsung. They deserve that respect. And I. It's funny because I disagree. I think that. Lg has done this to itself to some extent. But I also agree that Samsung just steals all of the air in the room by virtue of its of its a massive marketing budgets and that does not always translate into. It's fair comparisons. But I do think that. Lg deserve some of the blame here as well absolutely. I do think that they're like like things that Reviewers I wish cared more about but I mean it's it's really on the company to make people care about the product if people don't care about the features that they think are important and maybe those features aren't all that important in the end and and Yeah I mean L G has done plenty to confuse US reviewers and to to make us feel like man you know not. All of their products are as exciting as they could be. So I mean I design is definitely one of those things so if they if they could Polish that up I think it would be helpful to say the least Jerry. Finish your thought on that because I I want to hear what you think before we move on I think in North America. This phone is doomed just like any other. Lg Phone People are gonNA see snapdragon seven sixty five and then a seven hundred dollar plus price tag and nobody's going to buy it because for two dollars more a month can get a phone with a snapdragon eight sixty five and five G. even though they'll never be able to use it and all these other things that they have been told over and over by phone manufacturers dead they really need to have Part of that. I hate to blame US but sometimes I have to. We have to care about the phones that consumers care about if we want to stay in business. We can care about other things but we can't devote let's say. Daniel is the biggest. Lg Fan in the world. He can't devote time to say all the good things that LG does because he has to devote his time to running a business and when lg can't convince consumers that you know these phones are worth caring about. We can't get the message across therefore nobody's going to care. Well I mean the the irony there is at. Lg is still the third biggest selling the third highest selling Oem in North America. Just because of its Carrier relationships so that was a big reason why the sixty was only released carriers not unlocked like other LG phones. I'm excited to see what happens. I mean L G not leaving I think David Ruddick on the show a year ago and he had predicted that by this time algae would be completely out of the game the way that HCC seems to have kind of abandoned smartphone aspirations. So I'm glad that there's they're still in it and they're trying new things because the more competition the better I just hope that LG can can fix. Its endemic marketing. It's IT's software update its its pricing. It's just like the there are things that plague the company For every release and I hope that finally it can get get he can just leapfrog all of them and then really compete because mainstream is important whether you care about high photo high quality audio or whether you care about content creation on your device both of which. Lg is the best at the be. The best in the business at it doesn't matter if you're fundamentals are are bad and and you know the V. series is a great series but some of the fundamentals are just not up to snuff. You know maybe. Lg Fallen into the same trap is Sony. L. IS GONNA make phones forever and lose money doing it because the company itself can afford to do. So that's what we see with Sony. Today Sony loses money on every single phone they sell and they don't care they they WANNA sell a complete electronics services packaged to their loyal customers. Who have a Sony? Tv A Sony a the receiver so speakers. Sony this Sony that while you're a Sony Phone A L G position they can do the same thing and I wonder if that hurts their ability to you. Know they're not sweating trying to make the next best thing because if they don't make the next best thing they're going to go out. I I actually feel like I do think I do feel like. Lg is trying. I feel like Sony has been like really slow and innovation department except for I I kind of like. They're very latest attempt with the Exterior Perot. But other than that I feel like they have become really stale. I feel like LG is at least throwing things on the market. I think that it's clear that have try. They're trying with the velvet as well. I think the dual screen stuff at might or might not be the right thing for most people on the market. I think it's an okay solution but but you know it's it's an attempt so I'm I'm happy that they're in the market and that they're trying and that for some people There there still a pretty good choice. Yeah we're we're giving you like a thumbs up with the you're trying badge. Lg We're we're we're we're on your side. We we want you to do. Well I have to. I have to add by the way that I have convinced. Some of my Friends to buy. Lg phones because simply they become ridiculously cheap after a while and I have yet to hear any one of them complain about the lack of software updates or or all the things that we as peaks really seem to think that you know. They're the end all be all over the phone or or you know The fact that the vessels are a little thicker than the other stuff. And I've I've really not heard any of the complaints that I was expecting to hear from them and so I think maybe maybe this is one of the things where where are bubble cares about different things and The rest of the world so while. That's why you have crowd because you can cash right. We're GONNA bring it back around to the beginning here for remark. Well no say just finish. Finish that you're saying we're GONNA wait Yeah we'RE GONNA. We're going to wait and see how people actually what people actually think about products. It's GonNa be one of the interesting things that you actually be able to feel the pulse of the community. Hopefully you're going to be able to see if people actually care about Algeria or if it's just three people who are shouting loudly it's GonNa be hopefully showing the numbers. What trends do I mean? That's basically twitter in a nutshell. But yeah hopefully you can organize it a little bit better. So it's not just they don't get all of the all of the attention that that's the one thing right. You have to have a little bit more oversight than Jack Jack Martin. I'm not planning to okay so we got a little over so I'm not going to bring up the last. I was gonNA talk about Google's new Coat more coherent messaging strategy. So I'll just end it on this note What do you use primarily to talk to your friends and family now that everybody's at home are you. Do you use a particular Video Chatting Service Martin. So I've tried to convince everyone to join signal for just chatting with the medium success. A lot of people are are A. I've gotten some people through to switch. My Dad is on it. My my girlfriend is on it. And so on then we do. Video Co. Levin as well sometimes with my grandma and with my family I use skype mostly for video calling. Because that's just how we've always done things and We use Google meet For crowd because we have a G. suite subscription and. I mean I'm on. We are discord. Now we have a crowd discord with the people. So we're doing voice stuff over there as well so it's all over the place just like everybody else. Yeah I joined a lot of zoom meetings with friends. Lately I'VE BEEN IN SLACK. Kohl's it's it's really everywhere. It's a fricken mess man like nothing. There's no coherence. Google may be trying to fix. It's internal messaging strategy but just the world can't agree on what makes sense. That's why zoom has become so popular because I think people are just like. Yeah whatever works the end. Low hanging fruit right all right. Well thank you so much for being here. Martin it's been a pleasure as always and we'll have you back soon when crowd goes out of Beta. Hopefully when when you think that'll be just judging from the early impression are have absolutely no idea all right. Well you let us know because we'll we'll have you back when that happens two years from now because then we'll have you back before then all right well if people want to find out more about you and about your your youtube. Channel which distilling incredible and people should go watch working. They do that I am Tech Altair on all the platforms tech an A. L. T. A. Are Basically Youtube twitter. Those two most active classrooms. And you're still doing your Friday checkouts on stories right. Yeah literally have to go and do them now because I haven't done them yet and it's Friday six PM. So I have to have to go through them now. I will be releasing a new out video today on Nebula and tomorrow and Youtube so that content is also still still happening beautiful. Well I'm glad to hear that you're trying to balance content creation with building an entirely new platform for reviewers not even close to his ambitious as most people. 'cause doing amazing work. I'm surprised I really like it. I'm sleeping lot but the rest of doing it so I'm happy where I am. Congrats on the launch. It's it's an amazing achievement and I can't wait for more people to check it out. Thank you bad. I think you're onto a really great idea here outside Daniel that before the show. I think this is this could be the thing that really goes big. I'm very very happy to hear that when you when you get your Unicorn Billion Dollar Valuation. We'll be able to say we knew you want. Just don't don't forget about us when don't sell them. That's all we ask. Yes that's one of my cornerstones that I won't I will not I love. I love that you can say that I will. I will be popular but I will never sell the facebook. I really hope so. But but it's one of my goals in life to not sell to facebook so that makes it mean. That's just an admirable goal in general. Don't Sell Your Business. Don't sell your soul. Don't sell your data. Don't sell anything to this company period. Okay that's it Jerry. You're a hill. I won't give you a plug. 'cause you you're the best and people should just go read your stuff android central as I'm going. I recorded this so sometime down the road when I've done something that makes me not the best. I'M GONNA replay. It could play it. Doesn't it doesn't mean that I'll forgive you at the time you can try your best you can. You can leverage it as some sort of blackmail later on if you need to and I'm always just so grateful that people listen to this If you have any feedback for us if you want to get in touch about about anything we talked about during the show email us at podcast android central Dot Com. I'm at journey Dan. This is the central podcast. And we'll be back next week. Talking about chromebooks with our favourite chromebook. Nerd are a wagner. Stay tuned for that and I have a great week by Ohio.

US Jeremy Jerry Google Samsung LG Martin Germany North America Lg Sony Mediatek Europe qualcomm youtube Daniel Baiter developer Washington Post Amazon
Episode 1141 - Marc and Tom's Normal Things

WTF with Marc Maron Podcast

1:18:22 hr | 2 months ago

Episode 1141 - Marc and Tom's Normal Things

"Turn your great idea into a reality with squarespace squarespace makes it easier than ever to launch your passion project, whether you're showcasing your work or selling products of any kind with beautiful templates and the ability to customize just about anything you can easily make a beautiful website yourself and if you do get stuck square spaces, twenty four seven award, winning customer support is there to help head to squarespace dot com slash WTI F for a free trial, and when you're ready to launch us the offer code W T.F to save ten percent of your first purchase of a website or domain we. We all love sleep except when we wake up too hot or too cold. Thankfully, my sheets rock created the regulator sheets. These sheets regulate temperature while you sweep keeping hot sweepers, cool and cold sweepers comfortable. They're also extremely breathable and soft, so you'll get the best night's rest. That's because they're made of bamboo. Rayon, which transfers body heat two times better than cotton sheets. Check out my sheets rocket. My sheets rock dot com slash W. t.f and enter code WTI F for ten percent off and free shipping. That's my sheets rock dot com slash W. t.f. enter code W T F. All right, let's do this. How are you? What the fuckers? What the Fuck Buddies? What the Fuck Tyrians! How's it going? I'm Marc Maron. PODCAST WTI IF YOU'RE LISTENING TO W T F with Marc Maron that say old school reset. Hi Welcome back. I'm Marc. Maron you're listening to W. T F today. What the fuck is happening, man! Newly formed treadmill Gestapo. That's exciting I'M NOT GONNA. Go through the news. I. I'm just trying to temper. Temper the fear. Temper the temper. Temper the darkness. The, bleak hopeless landscape. Of current global culture. Fuck Man. As going I'm sorry I'm being rude you okay. Are you moving any of those things from home. You would think that people would need them now. You would think people are at home, just wondering those people that have. Either a problem or Credit Card issues. I would imagine are amassing things. People with money. You're probably buying things. People no money. You're probably selling stuff. How how's Your Business Doing? How the kids are you finding time for yourself? Are you taking walks. Are you going outside and you talking to friends? Are you saying hello? Do Your neighbors in that awkward way with a mask. Are you cleaning up? Are you organizing? Have you got everything together? Or are you in bed? Get up, get out. Make your bed shower up. Feed the fucking animals, and by animals and talking about your family. Then feed your pleasant pats. Maybe family can feed itself. I don't know your situation. I just know this togetherness is starting to crack some people. So look apparently we're not going to be shooting. The Fourth Season of glow till sometime in twenty twenty one. I do not know in stand up. Comedy is going to resurface. I'm not of the Type of comic that needs to go do shows drive ins or at half filled houses spread out as much as I enjoy taking the stage. I don't I don't need to do that. I save some money. I'm okay for now. You can catch me on instagram. Live occasionally. You can catch me here. where I'm not being particularly funny, but look today I'm GonNa Talk. To my friend Tom Ling. Many of you know Mr Sharply. One of the great broadcasters. One of the great broadcasters. If you do know him. You probably know him from his show the best show. And that's been on a little bit of a hiatus. He's finishing up a memoir. But you can always. Go, listen to the best show. Stuff at best show dot net. Here's some of the comedy. Here's some of the. Amazing. Pauses. Of Tom Scharping one of the great. broadcasting stylists of the of the late. Twentieth Century. And DEAR FRIEND OF MINE which happened later in life, a couple of the people that. Are My closest friends are actually people that I have not known all my life, but it's turning out. The I as wife goes on, they know them. Longer than you might think. I got a call from my first serious girlfriend. out of nowhere. It's not that we've been totally out of touch what we certainly don't talk much. But she. You know heard the news about linen checked in. And It was through interesting I. Mean that's going back to nineteen, eighty, two eighty three. You know that that's the one that. Set my on of course. An ARC. Of. Heart hardened anger. Over my own selfish, fucking emotional liabilities. That persisted. For Decades That first heartbreak, even though I did not know how to love or be loved or even behave properly other than. Angry and jealous. Possessive insane, insecure and emotionally needy and aggravated. That's two. That's a horrendous triangle, needy insecure and aggravated. Do. Not Step into that. Tornado but nonetheless. through a lot of things we've stayed in touch and she's had tragedy in her life. I have this tragedy in my life now. And, we had a nice conversation, but what's interesting is when you talk to somebody that was. In your life, no matter how long ago it was if it was real, and it was serious in it was emotionally connected. They are woven into the fabric of your being, and when I heard her voice on the phone it all. It's not that it all came back. It wasn't it didn't all come back, but the familiarity was there. It was just like the the semio's the connection. The the sort of emotional frequencies just kind sync up the laugh. You hear the laugh the person that you loved decades ago and it's not that it brings you back, but it it it reconnects you in the moment to something deeply ingrained in familiar in new, and it's a beautiful thing. Happy to talk to her. For some reason, the last few days of not. been too great. As. Many of you said about grief. You don't know when it's going to happen. You don't know when you're going to be overwhelmed with it. But I think what is happening for me now is that. The shock and trauma, and and sort of PTSD and the haze and fog of. Reality Shattering tragedy. is starting to recede a bit. And what's left? Is this sort of like? Just the the pure loss. We don't lose. A history with somebody. But the IT stops. You lose a potential future. It's just you know it's just sitting with it. That, this is my life and this is not. What I signed up for. But what do we sign up for? I mean that's the weird thing. I I did not sign up to be the guy crying alone in his bed with his sixteen year old cat I didn't sign up for that and I have to let it happen, and there's something about it that I find to be pathetic. And embarrassing where it's not. What it is, it's tragic and it's painfully human. But somehow in my mind, pathetic and embarrassing to WHO. You wouldn't have known it until I told you. That I was weighing my bed, looking at Oh monkey, listening to him as medically we's. And just crying and saying look man, it's okay. We did it. You did good. Thank you, but then like I. Just kept crying. Because I was alone. You know and I was processing the loss. This is it? This is the life I'm not saying. It's not going to go away or that. It's not gonNA. Ease up, or it's going to be the ride, not. GonNa Wallo. Not Feeling sorry for myself, I'm just having the feelings, and in that moment I believe the monkey was like I. Get it man. All right and he started licking my hand and grooming me and Mike. And Mike Dude thank you, but you gotta be tired of Shit and he's like I'm I'm all right all right for now. But yeah, you know. I've been fucking eating dude. Dude I've been eating. Pad Oswald sent me a box out of nowhere. I get this box of Jenny's ice cream again. Now I've gotten it twice now. From different people I think even Jenny sent it to me. But it was from Patton. Now you know thanked him. I said thanks for the ice cream. Pal Now I can be sad and fat. Really though thanks makes me feel better, and then like an hour later a huge basket. Of Food. Cookies Brownies Olives. You know the basket. Then I made a joke. I said Oh shit a basket to. Thanks man. This is almost as good as my girlfriend being alive again. then. I wrote to dark. But you know we're comics. It was dark. It was obvious sweet, horrendous joke, and he went ha, Ha, oh, man, and then he said if memory serves you're at the ice cream and baked goods phase of morning so i. wanted you to have the Primo stuff. I said beautiful. Thanks hope you're well, and he said hope. You're doing well and that you're getting better. I said overall better. Some days are sad. He said the sad days will never truly go away, but the days where you get to experience joy and every other emotion in the spectrum coming back, I promise. I, said thanks man. It's good to hear that. Patton Oswalt, stepping up nice man. That's the thing about friends. Showing gratitude. To them. Do that talk to your friends? and that's what this episodes really about. Tom I have done shows before we did. A series called the mark and Tom Show. We've done few those. I was on his show years ago new. Jersey but Tom's a guy that you know. We became friends who you know later not that long ago really. And just love the guy. and. He's been really present for me during this time. Vike between you and me. He'll come over and we'll eat dinner like once a week. We'll be back outside. Just talking mass quiz. With some distance between us. Just having a nice dinner. And you, talking for a few hours about stuff. Talking about people having some laughs talking about movies. He's over last night actually night before last. Had? Some dinner talked about the SAFDIE brothers Sandler Movies Paul Thomas Anderson. At the expense of not present. Which is nice talked about language. Talked about his new book Scott read his. Manuscript. But it's important to do that. However you're gonNA. Do it obviously some you like you. Guys just talked without masks on and we did. Outside. Not Too close. But. Yeah, man, I mean you gotTa. You gotTa Nourish. That part of you, you gotta stay engaged. You got to get some laughs and. I think also it's important to be. Grateful to the people that. Are there for you. And that somehow some for some reason, it's very hard for me to do I don't know why it's not that I don't feel gratitude, but to connect with the words not to be like. Hey, buddy, thanks man! Thanks for hanging, but just sort of like. You. Know Really. 'cause, that's the tone like that's nice in its polite, but that's you know the up. That's like pushing it out. They're like hey great to see you. You know it's different than like. Hey, you know has been very difficult time. And I. Really appreciate showing up for me. And I said that to my friend. Sam My set. My Friends Sam websites the other dude he he That guy calls me every night and we talked for like a half hour to an hour about stuff. I'll tell him how doing you know. It started off like a Y-. Okay, and he's walked me through sort of suicidal ideation crying heartache. All of it. But now you know we talk and he calls me every night and we just you know have few AFS. Talk about stuff books, thoughts news ideas the future. And just I dunno just got overwhelmed. The other night and I thanked him. With deep deeply. Grateful way you know got choked up and. Because he can't take your friends for granted, and we have these people in our lives that some people we've had in our lives forever, and yeah, you just sort of like yeah man bus best house you there for me, but. As you get older and when things start to break down when? Things people start to get sick when you know, it's just when people lose people I mean. That's where the fucking. Tire hits the road, so they say the tire hits the pavement. The wheel hits the. where the tire blows out, and the rims get all fucked up. That's when you need a friend. When you're fucking. Iran over a fucking bunch and nails put there. In the road. By Wiley Coyote the trickster. And all your tires boy out, and you're driving on those fucking rims. Because what he's just GonNa. Give up in the desert. Venture you have to? Start, walking. That's where your friends come in so. That's what's going on, and this is what this is now. This was recorded. before Lynn passed away not long before. And you know as I said you know I of. Done episodes. Where we just talked about the things going on. Things in the culture. We liked in this. This recording is actually an attempt to do something like that. And it was just as the pandemic was starting right. And it was a really an attempt to to feel somewhat normal to talk about normal things and I guess my point here is that it's important to still do that. Very important. Or else. We just going to be consumed. By. I don't know what your faith is or. How you're holding up, but you know it's bleak man. And you got you got a treasure and. and. Really rely on. That kind of human connection I think that's why a lot of people listen to this show. It's important do that. Also on dimension, there's a new batch of Ceramic W.. T. F. Cap mugs available from Brian Jones. These are the hand mugs I gave to my guests in the normal times back in the day so right now, getting these mugs from Brian Jones is the only way you can them i. it's almost like I'm talking to my guest now I I mean I can send you one if you're. On the show. By guess, also saying like you can't just break into Josh Brolin's house in. Get that Mug. Okay, you gotta buy from Brian and he's donating a portion of the sales of these mugs to the Connecticut, Food Bank. You can go to Brian. Are Jones Dot com slash shop? Starting at noon, Eastern, today. As I said earlier. Tom's taken a bit of a break from the best show as he finishes up his book, and you can always check out the best show material at the best show, dot net, and right now A. Tom is doing a new podcast with Julie. Klausner called double threat. You can get that wherever you listen to podcasts. This is me and Tom Celebrating things from the normal times. Coming right up. and. Folks. Everyone is figuring out new ways to do things in new paths for their futures during these times that makes it as good a time as any to make that dream project a reality and you can do it with squarespace. squarespace makes it easier than ever to launch your passion project, and right now we need all the help. We can get open an online store. 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It's relief ingredient, and now it's available without a prescription with pat today. Just one drop once a day works fast and lasts all day relief. Season is here to stay. Get Pat Today online in stores everywhere. Your. I. Guess, I'm finding a little crazy. Occasionally thinking thinking I have something. But there'll be times when I'm just suddenly like yes, it and I just realized it's like I have these things happened my whole life? Right? Have A. Congested for half a day and then it passes, but now suddenly it's like Oh. There's gotTa be it and I'm not I'm not gonNA. Make it through it. I used to smoke. I'M GONNA end up in the hospital. So, we'll tell you that that coffee I went out of the way and I got some Dunkin donuts beans. Okay, just because sure I gotta think for Dunkin donuts occasionally. Yeah, and I was in Ralph's I. Get a bunch of good coffee. I GET HIGH END SHIT! Yeah, and I just saw the bag of Dunkin beans and might fuck it now. Let's go I'm living. I'm going back to New England. Right you're back to your Boston. Yeah jacked up. Did they have in Jersey Oh? Yeah, Dunkin donuts is everywhere chock-full and nuts, too. Yeah less less. That, but that was more of a Manhattan thing. I would see those when I way I into the city from New Jersey I'd see like shock on outs I bought the can chalk on for a while full nuts. You'd see the oversized cans in like like my grandmother like they would regret. Hardly deflate. Jonathan Chock full nuts and they would have like a jar Sanca. Guess they didn't WanNa sank a yeah. Go through the production of making coughing yet and. But then but Dunkin donuts. That's what got me drinking coffee like doing when I was. Like my nobody, my family drank coffee so I didn't grow up with coffee drinkers, but then just at some point when you're like. Like eighteen nineteen year just like I got a check in what the big deal with us! It's time and then it was like Oh my God. This stuff is. This I was like. I would like I'm on a lifelong journey. My head would spin that. Would make you vibrate yet. That's what I go for. It still does it. Yeah, I'm coming up now. I'm going out where you're just like. Wow I don't do anything else on clean and Iran today so I sweat. Everything else is going right in Oh. No, you're just going. This is like if you just poured coffee in your car and. That's what you're doing right now. Drove up to the. Empty empty ten gallons of coffee. Yeah, well, that's what I used to do. And I did radio and Air America I used to have the driver stop at fucking three thirty in the morning and I'd buy one of the. You know the kind that you people bring to. The office handled cartons. Oh, no, those. Yeah, the get one of those. Doughnuts. Dunkin Bag eminem soon and that's what I. by the time I got on the air. I remember one time was doing a live thing with with John Worst and were backstage somebody. and. I was just like so. I need just like. Just like dying for just energy and. I took like a giant coffee and then I had a thing of peanut eminem. I'm eating. PM Sandra. Somebody like saw me and they're just like. Like the long is wrong with you. And I'm just like. You're. Almost ready to like. Put The in the Coffee Club. You don't realize what you look like. You Look Squirrel you're. You're drinking the coffee now. Still so focused. Yeah, Oh, yeah, just like if I put the Eminem to my mouth and. A mouthful coffee, immelt. The one two punch the chocolate, and the the shell melts away, and I got the coffee and he'd just like. It's just the greatest thing, oh? My God and he's like a flying high. Comes in interrupts you. You're right. Yes, looking like boy, yeah. You're right. It's just like me. I'm doing great. You kidding me. With my tire, life I gotTA mouth alade. And Coffee. Like. That'd be doing any better the highlight of my existence. Exactly. How do you think I'm doing? What you worry about. Worry about yourself. Give. Oh my God so so you're burning through a lot of lot of entertainment during this. What do you what he seems to me like? I'm like I liked what you said. About Little Richard and four in. What's his name four inch? Yeah, I think that makes sense that without a little little Richard and four inch, and Ryder that we would have. Infinitely, less good music well I mean. It's crazy when you think about is like. Like you think my like influence, the and it's just like I mean like Little Richard, change everything of it like over and over and just like really. Set the pace for just like that kind of perfor- there'd been there'd be no James Brown and ramones. Prince and there'd be no remote as all of that stuff came I mean let alone Elvis, but it's like you see the that drive your. There was the fashion of it. There was the showmanship of it, but he his particular. Groove yet was even more than in a way was more than Chuck Berry there was the drive of his rock and roll If you listen to the MC five to fruity, realize like that's it. And then that goes right to the ramones. It's a straight line and it's just and. It's also funny when you listen to like these other things, and they're so thin sounding and. Lou compared to the original thing like sometimes like growing up. I was not like a blues. Yeah, person, then then you hear these blues records, and then you hear the rolling stones version just like I prefer the rolling stones version. Because it's just it's within my frame of Reference Walk Route, player. Yeah, but then you hear like these. Like you compare like little Richard's Tutti fruity with M. C. Fives version MC five's version census thin, an accord assembled like it sounds like you hear them like. Holding it in the studio right rather than them just playing it live in one room and just with just. Mike's Hanging over them. Just like We got in that piano man into the whole box yesterday that the mono box set of all the for the first five. Sure sure, it's just there. It was just a drive in his voice. You know to me that I. was that I listen to that music when I was a kid I. Don't know why that's all. I wanted to know how to do. Guitar was inconven-. In any. I wanted to do those three core things and I guess I got a little Richard through the Beatles. Right and my dad played all that Shit when I was a kid i. that was what wired my brain I talked about on the podcast. Just about how like my father's excitement about Buddy Holly Ritchie valance You know in that American graffiti soundtrack. My father's right I grew up with the thing that was just like. The template. ZETI STONE! Oh, please and. You listen to that and. It's just amazing. The basis that that the just the range of everything that those records covered and they were just. It's coming out of like a disposable industry as a it's weird. How the timelessness came out of something that was just people thinking. This isn't going to last two years from now just. Turn out the hits Yay and they'll turn into garbage. Don't worry about what tomorrow is because. We're just trying to make money today. On seven inch records and I had the Dick Clark. Twenty years of rock and roll occur election and American graffiti. My Dad had in the car. We had a buddy holly collection. He loved it. Yeah and I think. I got through like I knew buddy. Holly's slipping inside and before I knew little Richard's okay, yeah but those records all of them like I always wanted to do. If I was going to ever do a music show I kept thinking about playing the songs at my Daddy, so like in the car Shershukov. Oh my God that that's something I. Oh yeah, that was like the most formative like that's the stuff. It's amazing. How simple humans are when it's just like. You'RE GONNA. Hear this when you're eight and you're never gonNA. Forget ever ever it's this is this is. This will stay with you for the rest of your and will always be your favorite thing, even if you don't revisit it often right or you don't think it's your favorite thing. It's kind of your favorite thing I got some a couple of songs I. listen to download them recently. Like for like Oh, the, but the I had was at. This is stuff that that my father and I bond around that my father shared with me, but then I realized that it was really one of the rare times where he wasn't upset or yelling or freaked out, or or you know like he was occupied and seemingly excited. Yeah, so it wasn't that he was like. Don't you love visit was like? Hey, this is making dad feel better exactly. Happy? Can't let's keep playing the. Let's keep the. Yeah? I listened to know, but that was the one that he he loved the stroll for some reason. which I think was the diamonds. Weird kind of greasy sacks, drifting nuts on gum. Lynch, Joe. Yeah, yeah, he liked he loved. That'll be the day and other things, but I listened to peppermint twist, the stroll and little darling, which was also the diamond. Little Darlings one of my all time favorite song. The most Rockin. It's song because it's just like it's is overwhelming. How much is going on? Where it's like yeah! It's happening. You're just like this is the most overstuffed thing I've ever heard my life. My Darling I. Need You just like? One Minute Long. Everything is happening in this. It's really just like. That's that thing. That makes a mark on you, and then it's amazing that it's just like I'm not a obviously not a kid. WAS COMING OUT NO. Our dads, but there's something so. Pure about it that it just isn't time stamp at all. It's just like I. Mean you obviously know when it was recorded? But just like the but it, but the spirit of it is just had the proximity to the source point. Of Rock and roll, is close. Yeah, so I you gotta figure the newness of pushing out that way. had to fuel that, so the the purity of it is real right, so if if rockstarts fifty or fifty six really by couple of songs that they didn't even know what they were doing. Right, Delta Eighty eight or rock around the clock Oh yeah, like Turner and the don't even know what their. Because riddick decided right, but something happened now somebody somebody. decided. It's funny that somebody told the story. that it went through someone's Lens what this was right and there's there's clearly there were people watching. This story told him being like that's not the story right I was there. WHO's this guy? But he wasn't there and he's the one. Fiction! He's the one telling everybody how this went and it doesn't mean it's like. Even like as a kid for like the referencing, I can relate to like rolling stone like I would read like the rolling stone album guide, and I would just like stare at the the ratings and the reviews of the stuff I wake. And then you don't think like it just seemed like there was this like like. This is just the truth. And just like this sucks. Yeah, because it got to stars. Then you meet people and you just realize there's not some giant all knowing. Force called rolling, stone. It's just like magazine writers. twenty-four-year-old! WHO's like? The. I was into Tucson's. They had the review eight records at day. You work on your record for your whole life, and somebody's just like. Yeah. I got write three record reviews today in their blast. Through your thing, they're in a bad mood. Here's this the last on the pile exile apparently. Grabbed me, but I just always remember abuse like. Yeah like seeing that story. The people telling the story would be like. Like a coup had their biases where they were just like rolling stone was so anti Zeppelin during the seventies I. Don't like I'd never had black Sabbath right all that, so they hated it. I don't know where the hell came to me. Like I never trusted, or it never knew read, or if you're going to pick critics, who the hell are the I'd work at rolling stone, but like I never like I don't know I. Don't know how I. came about the like I'm relatively new to amassing records. right but I. I. Know What you're saying that rolling stone, everyone everyone they're. They're all curator's of some kind like the the magazine's not a curator, but they have a context, is it? This is what rolling stone believes in and is what we like what we don't like right? You can see that feel that. Yeah, and it's the same with guys that I. Buy Records from or when I was a kid who turned me under records outside of my father who set the groundwork, which was good groundwork i. mean I think that having? been built on the Oldies for rock and roll in general, it's good. In there But then as I got older, you know I had records. Everyone had than I inherited records, and then like I had a few hundred records in high school, and things were happening high school, and there was a guy in high school the Termi onto the shit, but now i. I mean I. don't even know what you're sitting on your like. There's some I the. There's this mysterious thing about you in that way comedy records you have, and then it's like Oh my God. You can't even say. And then I pictured. There's there's probably houses filled with records and back in Jersey Yeah. There's there's a lot of records. The fairmount, but like what are we talking? Thousands I guess. I mean it's just it's. It's all I ever. Did you know only win from when I was ten? Of buying records. Secretive about it or your shame. It's sometimes. It's always picture the idea that you spend your life collecting thing and you're just like. Don't touch on that one. and. Then you die and then. He's just. Throwing all it in a dumpster with no just like I. Don't know what this stuff is. They didn't buy it at the estate sale. Just. Cheaper to throw it. Just rent one of these dumpsters. They drop in your driveway. Brother, just going to. Keep this. Yeah, and that's like I. Picture that being. I also don't want to get caught up in the. The I don't know there's like a collecting side of things that's always been such a bummer to me where it's like. It works, and it's either sounds like a like a trite thing, but where people are just like. They lose sight of the music by what. Am I can't do that and I don't have the room for it, so that was sort of the. Fear of I've had a fear of. The records owning me for a while and It's a scary thing because the records can own, you know I. Know in like I bought I've bought things sealed like I had I sealed something yesterday I'm trying to remember what the hell it is. I opened because I got a sealed copy of and Mike Who's who my waiting for? To listen. To this I bought this at some point, and it was still sealed like when I go through like I I've been listening to. All the records I've been primarily to out of the records. The older records I get hung up like I. Want I. Want a time. Travel I want old records I get sent a lot of new records and I'll listen to him a couple. Times rarely feel compelled to to keep new records I. Don't know why. Unless they speak to you sure amazing sure. I'm compelled to hold onto all of it. This is why I'm oh trying to. It's a barrier that guy, so so you've just got. Hip five years from now I. Know Maybe. If I got rid of it then I'm the I'm a real sucker. Thank loading this thing now. If I'M GONNA, want it five years. It's like just say good and go get it again, but we right, but so. Have you found that that happens? You got all these records that you thought five years from now. You'd like him now. It's ten years later and he's. Sitting there. There's a there's a certain philosophy that I. Have where it's just like. Isn't it enough that I knew the right things? If it doesn't mean I, read the book or I? Listened to the record. It's like I knew what the good ones were. Isn't that half of? That, most of this like I, think so I can curate the per, but it's like, but that's, but that's, but it shouldn't be though it should be. Like should be able to be happy with just like this liberal stash of the best stuff and let that be what that is, but see but see I. My thing is been like I'm amazed at how much I don't know so like when I deal with you. Know I imagine if we spend time together with your records I would be like I. Don't know anything about this and I like that feeling so then like. How am I going to learn about this It's funny I started this. In the pandemic? This has been a chance for me to start five new podcasts. Great I. Ju Julie. Clouds I started one. We're doing and then what you do over the. I do it on zoom on my and she's Oh. She records good to just sink. Good at yeah, our producer puts it together and that's. We're doing that and that's called double threat, but they also started this other one for like a bonus thing for best show. Yeah, people and it's me and the. The producers on the best show we're going. Year by year through crosby stills, Nash and young through all of the through every solo album, really yeah, and it's like we just recorded this morning for two and a half hours I'm just like. We're doing to two I J each. It's so Yoshi you're going backwards to. We're now we're going in. We're going chronologically. Four. We started with the first episode was every in the first episode was like episode. Zero would be like everything before. CSM So Buffalo, Springfield. Colleagues and then. We're taking two year chunks that time going forward. We just did seventy, five, seventy six, and it was just like. It's like one of the worst experiences of my life. Stephen Stills made four albums a year at one point where he was like cl- I recorded every one of his albums in Miami, so you just don, Pablo's. Exactly running around with guns. Dressed in like either a football Jersey or like dresses like some paramilitary guy and you're just like. And it's just like. But it's like music. Oh, I mean. Some of the stuff is like. There's these crosby Nash albums right. They did one like every eight months. Yeah, and you're just like. You guys are just like it. You guys like you look like you're dying like you look at the cover and they look so unhealthy. And these records are just and then, but just concurrently neil young as like transcending. Like. Reinventing the whole thing, yeah, every album! Yeah, like crosby. CROSBY's too much. Listening thing I did with him. The Greatest. Kind of an asshole. Dude. He would've stayed at my house all day, but but the thing that was amazing about him is I I never I didn't know him. You Look I've got a I've got plenty of love for crosby stills Nash and young and crosby stills and Nash highly. You know I don't. That's the thing I. I like sweet, Judy Blue Eyes in in the live record and You know deja-vu some of it, but. I was into it. When I was a kid, it was formative. Sure mm-hmm, but. But, he didn't know him. I think I tracked him down on twitter I. Don't know if I told you this and I get this phone call from him about no. Time. And I'm I. DON'T WANNA. Get into it now. Because I don't want to betray anybody, but yes something. There was something going on between. Between him and Graham that involved a woman in. These guys are like eight. I mean they've made some of this more public now. Some of the like the. Yeah, he's telling me. You didn't get signs like look man I. Don't want to get into that so if you're planning on getting on my number one I don't know what he's talking, but deeper than that who could possibly give a fuck I mean they're ninety and. Not Get into the chick then. What do you? Does there somebody who is actively like waiting for this information? Just they're fighting over check girlfriends, and just like still it's insane that these guys first of all it's saying all four of them are alive. It's an unbelievable. God bless all of them. They're still. Yeah, four of the ramones are dead. Yeah, all four of crosby stills, Nash Young a lot I don't think stills can hear nothing stills a not doing particularly Great Kirby's just meeting kids. He had yeah. He's forms of bandwith. Yup! They self publishes itself releases his record. We got him to call the best show one night. We're just doing show and one of the producers, Jason just starts. Poking him on twitter being like Hey, call up and he calls up. The weird thing is ever happened so like. Hey Man. And just like. I had no preparation for the no. Nukes David Crosby online for I'm just like. Okay! Because I'm talking to David, crosby now and I was just like I just want to say. Thank you for calling in. Yeah, you know this one birdsong everybody's been burned is one of my all time. Favorite songs were like. and. He's like Oh year. You like the old stuff. Okay, okay, and then I like quick type like David Crosby DOT COM. It's like I like your new outlets. Love the name of new album. The name of the I knew it was going to call in. I would have listened to it if I hadn't pro. Star Newsday's like okay. Okay you like the new stuff and. Start talking about nukes right day. Start talking about nukes and. But. He was so like you just picture I'm just sitting there. But. He was one of the fucking I, he was top notch, ego, Monster, just fucking and drugs, and just two weeks almost satanic yet, Diane, nasty and fucking cluster. Fuck up there in the hills you know. He was like the Lord owner and off. Yeah, he was like. Those guys were the first people that like. The hippies were just like. These guys are just out for the money. Like money and the sex they got singled out just like they're charging twice as much for concert tickets and they're just like they think they're. They're rockstars and we're supposed to like. They were the first ones to kind of get to kind of get dragged by the by the by the counterculture like cs ny really like represented this This thing of just like you guys are fakes, and you're just. You're not a part of the call like. 'cause back then. It was always interesting because. That kind of makes sense because I think the. Either the A in our guy I mean they were a geffen project and I mean deja-vu was David Geffen so I one of his first. And I think in that in his push. Yeah, like in, and he's clearly a a guy who's going to sell out the fucking Hippie doesn't care. But I think I think he was. They were with him. deja-vu is now and I'm just look what do I know I mean they were all kind of hanging out, but obviously guys why Geffen saw a tremendous amount of money in the most fuck the 'cause they mean you. You can maintain the illusion. Fellas, absolutely. No, they were like. Because I think Geffen did that big. They did like this big seventy four mega mega tour where they're applying like football stadium. Right and I think that was a geffen thing, but you don't like any of it I mean really ought. I like Dan's big crosby so a fan like that. I can't remember album. Remember. If I, could only remember my name. Record. Yeah! I think. Series Hippie Shit, there yeah, but that's a sad record. Two because his girlfriend had just die. Like you! It's A. Feel it. Yeah, you can kind of feel. This is a guy trying to get healed through music and I. think that's in it, but then. He goes off the rails Kinda. On the rails and off the same time I'M Just like over the next ten years. You can. If you just look at the pictures of everybody year, you're just like in aging a doll. Year seven years. In Jail I mean you know ends with a Mugshot when he's got short hair? Delivers going on. Yeah, but here's my thing like. Like I'm going through. The records have gone through them. All I got I got new record dividers that are very nice, okay. I moved the jazz upstairs I had more room downstairs. Your jazz and comedy upstairs comedy is just sort of a guilty pleasure, I. Don't listen to like jazz kind of like. You know what people are like. Kind of Jazz. Jazz you can listen to again I can with. Throwing on Shelley Berman album again. To time. There's no. There's no nuance. It's like I didn't hear that. What like did you hear the beat on that? They took it took an extra second before he says like a there's a woman hanging outside of the window and see what is the upper limit of how many times you could listen to. Record exact three. Well some of them were kind of like. There's one record that I will play for people and it's a Rodney dangerfield record before he got the hook. It was called the loser or something. It's actually signed. I don't know where I got it, but it's kind of long form bits, so it's. It's Rodney doing this thing that you just don't know him for before he got the respecting way. Nice thing. I it's Kinda Nice to listen to people before they. You know fully formed Oh. Yeah, yeah, but I think the the most interesting thing about comedy records is just the bad decisions. People make about the cover art which I've done myself. When you look at comedy records like? How did they think that was a good idea? Even peers of mine people we know have record covers were like really you're holding your. Always like what are you doing? Those the covers of comedy records and The the way a stages dressed on comedy special community so telling where you come out into the giant pencil. Mistakes people are just like bad mistakes, props. It's like A. Just like it's like I'm in the playground, but these options. That's the fucked up thing. That's the worst thing you can do because it's like with comedy, central half hours or like. Yeah, let us know what you want to do with the states, so my first one I did two of those. And the first one I'm Mike for some reason. I'm like I WANNA sideshow banner. Okay, because I thought. I? Don't know what thought it'd be interesting. Yeah, but it just. It looks weird, just a fat lady in. You know and I'm like what was I doing and mean? People are like what's that? Why does he have that up? And then the next one was worse. Where where it was worse I come a shame to fool, was it? And so two, thousand, two, thousand, six I think and like I'm like I want I want. It was not one of your big big. You're not one of your banner years to. Wasn't bad I was in Air America was pretty political. Yeah! I was you. The set was type. It is pretty political. Yeah, so I had this idea in terms of like you were because people you know the whole. Thing. It's like you are not. Right after I, think I'd just wasn't. I separated yet. I might it might have been right before we got divorced because you had the two because I always look at seven Air America thing I always look at us like after two thousand four. It was like because I went to. That I went to that election party that. Two thousand four election. which was one of the most I? Mean that to me is the launch you mean the launch party for Air America, no, like literally the night of the two thousand four presidential election. It was just like Oh. Yeah, like when like when Bush one? Yeah, when? There was flake. Sam I will talk to Sam Cedar in the morning and he would just be like he's like. Carries got this in the bag. I just to somebody. fucking Lawrence are Donald. Did that to me with Hillary to the fucking bowery I'm going to do. She can win. He's like Oh, yeah. And I remember being at that party and watching like. People like there. I can't remember, but it was such. I just remember seeing like. Rachel Maddow and Was winstead. Yeah, let's win set and they were people just like. Well, there's counties in Ohio. Have come in yet and those are more Democrat and there's just like watch. Over. Lost, but people are just trying to like. Pull hope from nowhere. And felt like the Air America. Thing was just like. This place existed to beat this guy and it's like what's going to be now, is that? What did you just keep pushing against it? Yeah for me. It was fine, but the but the set was the problem where I thought like I'm going to have a big picture of a herd of sheep. Okay going the other way. And I'm going to be your the sheep going the other one going the one sheep sure, if not them not going to heard. Yeah, so there's a picture of a literally a photograph of the asses of a herd of shoes. and. Then somehow I signed off on the idea to have one stuffed sheep. Sure on the state okay. And I did that that off. In the world. That there was a point where somebody said. Do you like the sheep and yeah? Yeah put the one out there. 'cause that solidifies. Yeah Oh you just see me sitting. Standing up there with passes Y- behind me. Stupid stuff but stage, yeah, and then my mind and my. I'm I'm. I'm nailing so funny that you get to the point where you're just like. Of course I. Don't need any of that thing you needed. Literally. None of it gave you the option. That's what I'm telling you. That was their way of personalizing it because they turn those things out the half hours. We're all shot one week sometimes two day. Yeah, so. They're like what you want. We're GONNA. Make it your own. And whatever stage look like at that thing. That is a giant crib and then. Every comedian has. Their good. That's what they put their money into. His guy gets getting these set changes, but that Moore did it take for mind nothing a put a slide up and they brought a stuff shipping. We've got the slide in the. Reads. This is easy to go and the other time. It was just a sideshow banner That was a bad. That was bad. Because like I was. I was sober yet, and and I came out to la a sad experience, still married to I. Don't remember what year that was. Where'd you tape that? At the like over here in Hollywood I'm vine I remember what theater was was one of those theaters over there, okay? The Ivar may be or something where they I don't remember but but it was like that was the year that Hedberg taped his changed his wife that thing he did, and I was Aaron like he didn't do that well, but the kids loved it. Yeah, and I remember they bust in a Lotta Samoans. I don't know why they were busing in audience members and all I know. Is that like I'd come out here? I would I knew my material and I watched some of it the other day, and it's bad and I were a black suit with a red shirt I was well groomed, and I really was like I'm going to stay clean. GonNa come out here and just be. Like, the night before the special, I just went over to. The Guy I did drugs with that time. WHO is out here? You know and Bob. I was like I just do a couple. Nine die ended up wake up all night not with him, but just in my fucking hotel room going why fuck I do that. And I do the I do the set and it's bad, so OK? Nothing lands like someone done a thing on youtube written an article, a deep dive into the rabbit hole of me, just all the way up through the current special, and had a large along clip of that one I'm telling you about and I'm like Oh my God and there are things i. remember loving loving about that set uh-huh, and so here's how this was the worst moment about it. Though so I do this. It's my first half hour for comedy central and I walk into the dressing room and I got no friends there. Nobody's there except my Koci except for Bob and And he's in the green. Room going yeah roast beef. That's that's what I walk. Is Bob standing there with a plate or roast beef. Yeah didn't even say good set and I was sort of like yeah, with the fuck of I. Know. This is bad. Yeah, I played. I was at Maxwell's for a yellow. On the first, that's one of the first times we had an extended conversation with. One of their Hanukkah shows. That's right, and I never felt like I did well at those things that was the night. You and I had a long conversation right in the hallway. We should Fran exactly. It's just like this thing. Where like you're like? It is such a weird thing where you're just not sure especially when you carry so much just like shitty. for which I know I do just like I, said I mix it up with this guy. What's it there? I mean show like this Guy Shaves. Go after like for no reason. Yeah, it's. It's so fetig the I. Know! He's a great guy. Sweaty to wasn't sweating. It's always hot. The Maxwell Maxwell those Yala Tango. Shows. Were So. Crowded and I just remember early on like I tweeted something. That was like weird. Blind items sub tweet thing that lake. About, what can a shot at some at another podcast? Not You right and is remember Brendan like writing before. I even knew Brendan just like say hey, you talking about us, I'm like no. He's like Oh cool because I like. Shall and it was like like your show too, and it's like that's all dislike. Exactly friends with everybody was just like no. I was ripping on somebody else out good. Yeah. That's exactly it. Yeah, they're terrible. We're friends. Sad State of affairs. The Rodney thing saying. I've been watching so much. This youtube channel of now. A lot of over tonight jokes. About him, I say about him as like you know it's. It's odd that. In the big picture in the history of comedy, he doesn't get the respect he deserved. He's still doesn't. and. He's great. It's unbelievable the level of Him and rickles covered. Every thing I'm interested in like to represent all of the comedy I could ever want your thing and it's like. His thing is just so like. If you watch a bunch of the tonight. Show things you realize the game with in the game that when he would sit down on the couch with Johnny and then just be just kind of like. They're just going through just like health. Dumb Kid yeah yeah. This ramp to like he just he just he gets to the, and it's just like you could see the amount of fund that they're having knowing that. This is a game that like always do as land one with Johnny and it's like like he doesn't always win one. 'cause Rodney like right out of the gate. He like everything's twitching. Everything everything is moving on. That guy had his arms his legs. He's wedding me touching himself. It's like it's everything's going, and it's all funny. It's it's the funny. The funniest conceit is that he sits down, and then johnny goes hiring. It's like I'm doing good last week. I was in rough shape though last week Russia. Last week last week I was in rough shape is the funniest thing I've ever heard. And then when like one doesn't land, he'll just go like well, not funny that some of just not to be cute. It's just like and that just kills Johnny the idea that just like. He knows when he bombs on my God. He's only trying to lend jokes man and it's like he's so like he's such a package that guy. And then to find retrospect, he's been paralyzed with depression. Oh, he's profoundly sad. unfixable Richard Lewis. say he referred to it as a heaviness got the head. Or breaking. You can just feel a dislike. I just think you. You feel this guy. And there's seems like there's a part of that just like. Where were you bombs when I was trying to make him? Hook ME THIRTY YEARS TO GET HERE? I hate all. You had to sell Pot Adami. And been fucking. Go get into the women inciting business with Joe Answers at fucking kids. You ask xactly. Where were you guys? You made me you made me grind it out. I'm in my fifties before you get started. Paying attention and everything like all all he's doing is trying not to get sucked into the vacuum of self just darkness fighting I'm trying not to drown here Johnny don't get me and he just won't women. He just knows to not. Show, the person like he just noisy just like I'm never show you I'm not once. You get these little glimpses. Of like the like the ACT A and we're, he'll just be like. Like, he'll just say like like I. Got Dates on playing over at this. You know I got this movie coming out easy money and it's a good movie, but I really like doing the live stuff just like you just know. He hates like he hates these movies. He just he just knows he's grabbing whatever they'll give him. He'll take. Yeah, but it's not why he's there. At the live show like stand up is what? Kept the lights on for the guy, and then whenever we get to that moment where he's just like I played a lot of rough places. Vetoes boom boom room easily. Mundi Oh. I'm so glad these A. Looking at us to always end up on him to I like rickles to the thing I liked about rickles. Is that rickles like almost always on TV appearances would say like twenty percent of what he said makes no sense at all. It's it's make. It's just word salad. Just. This guy's got the thing on his head with the two four things. And the five Spaghetti O's who bill this guy is busy. Knocking on the door is trying to tell me trying to sell me a pair of pants and you're just like what's that mean? Lake timing was always. Does knows he can like Ram it through, and he knows like some of these are nothing I've ever watched him do A. And like the the thing that killed me. I'll never forget agency system some guy. Front and I think it was a play. Where where'd you get that to come with the two pairs of pants and a Yoyo? He would go his. There's this thought. It might be like five hours long of him every. Every Lake it was like I think it was like every letterman appearance for rickles from from like an eighty three way to win like. His final one and it just like when he came out with a cane when he would be out. There already would come back from a commercial break. He'd be sitting there because he couldn't walk, so, but he would be like. One of the funny, it's like one of the meanest in funniest things he did this. He would like all like do variations on jokes or you just be like? He'd be like. Dave I went to I was on Jerry Lewis is telephone and he comes out he sings. You'll never walk alone. The kids get up and leave. The. Meanest? Everybody like. Era Moments where watch rickles, and he's filled with real fury among you can see it like I. It's all cute, but like something behind their. That's sort of like Oh my God. Yeah, well, he also he. It must be a thing to to know your the court jester for them for for these for these legitimacy that one of the where they set up. A MAKESHIFT VEGAS. Lounge for him to entertain people in show business. Have you seen that I don't know I? Don't know it was like I. Don't know who did. It was a Dean Martin Luther something I think. I might have it, but they're like you know this guy. We're GONNA. Yeah, he's the guy who does there so we? If you've never seen him in Vegas, and so they created on the set like a stage for him to do his Dick. But in the in the audience is Pat Boone like all these weird celebrities volume. Kinda and he just goes Adam. It's crazy. Yeah, it's crazy because he's sweating and it's like it's probably how is not the worst nightmare you know, but he must be. It must be the worst and the Ba- like his bulletproof he knows. I can say I have the Mike. I can say whatever I want and you. People are GonNa Laugh. When he says like his timing was so good when James James Stewart teams. and. It goes like Jimmy. I talked to the family. You're doing fine. Those are always. On my God he would like he That album he did this album. Hello, dummy, which is like just the standup like. At the end I know at the end of it. There's the speech he always did where it's like. We I was in the Navy, and we stood on that ship looked out, and we were all others. I don't make fun of little people. You're all big like it's kind of a cop out. But he like. There's a point where he's like He's a showing. He made fun of anybody's. Like. Where where are you from and the guys like? Uh? I'm well. She's like. Let me make you feel at home. Earn cave-in like so. He could just do it like a mining. And everybody is like I was like this guy is. Just, like he can say anything, he could spend anything. It's all rhythm pace and force of the words. Yeah, like you have to kind of realize how little you need, it's. It's not the specials you. Didn't you realize you didn't need a cheap onstage? No need anything, and then you're better off without even shooting the audience. That was the best thing I started doing. Don't ever cut to the audience. It's just a trick, so you can cut may cuts. Why look at that Weirdo white like evening the Improv like why am I looking at those people I, never, WanNa. See the audience and these things and it just feels like. You know what I can't stand the special whenever there's like this thing. When like is somebody make a? Reference to just like the like you know. Basically mentioned some either like a either gender or ethnicity, and they cut to the audience member of who lines up with the job it's like. The, it's like the worst thing. I ever saw my life to black people just like there was nothing worse than The audience cuts during Paul Rodriguez. I did a special in a prison just horrendous. That might be the only one I would wanNA see audience reactions to it just it, but they would cut it like people clearly didn't want to be seen. What is the what is for you? The ceiling on what is for for? Comedy. Crowd, wise size wise like what? Where do you think it gets lost? I would say you. you start to kind of buckle. At twelve hundred, okay I think you can still kind of make something intimate with twelve hundred and make comedy real. You can still reach the battle. Get up into two thousand or fifteen hundred e what was Carnegie Hall Twenty, two hundred yeah, but that's a different kind of that rooms got perfect sound situation so that when you did Carnegie, Hall You. You felt like you were reaching the I felt like I did not do well. But. Statement was such a fun show never got off stage. She'd be like two hours in Graz. Because I was sitting there I was sitting one row, and for my mind your mother, and then you just went off, and you did the stuff about your mother and I'm watching your mother watch. This is the highlight of my life. Right now watching this guy, reckon with this thing. And Twenty, however many thousand. We're we're all spectators to this guy finally squaring off with his mother. Did I. Do yeah. You're doing the whole thing about this like. Why don't I get to pull the plug? On my brother. His number one. He gets the ball the plug on it. Yeah, yeah, why does he get to? Seeing you do that in front of her to to her. Really. Was this like you just a race? All it would just be. You and hurt heading in Carnegie Hall. Had The lady. Bring out my phone to read the email from my father. Yeah! Yeah, riffing is, it's a big night for me to riff for an hour but that's the cap that to you is like a different structure. Yeah, it was that was tricky. I felt the weight of it. You could see like I can open my I can feel when I'm open, and when it starts to buckle, like I can feel like like in my heart, I can feel like. It's fight now. I'm losing them back to okay. Did you feel like you lose? I would. This is so interesting to me. Do you feel like? When you look at a theater, yeah, are you focusing on sections? Are you focusing on the entirety of the room or you were the when you're when you're onstage. Theaters like have a good role to them, and you know you. You feel you know buoy. We'd like it really depends also on the acoustics of the theater, but like when I did a symphony hall both times I did the symphony hall. Three times I, did one in San Francisco to one in England. And I did a Bam like they're like that type of structure that's built for an Orchestra Mike I started to feel like like at any second I could get zero laughter. Okay and I. Don't know why like it was like that was. There was the potential for the connection to break. Right right feels like yeah, like I'm going to be up here alone. and I'm going to hear myself talking and it could happen. And I don't know why. I think it's my own fear. Maybe it's something because ultimately that's on me. right like I. Don't know what what makes me continue to be confident in those moments, but even when you're bombing, you've got to keep doing the act so you you do not, and it's a liability. It can happen, and it's a horrible feeling I don't know why, but like I can't open back up and here. I am you know not even on autopilot, but I'm just doing it, but I'm not connecting and now I gotta live with this. Yeah for an hour. So, worst and into and I don't know I always think a at a symphony hall. It's sort of like this isn't built for one troubled Ju. This is built. This is built a House symphony. You know of people that spend to put together a big thing. Yeah, not me going God. What is going to happen? And do you do feel yourself watching yourself do it. I've only had that happen once or twice like servant. Body the worst. UNINDO BACKSTAGE! You can't. I'll meet you back there. Sorry, Buddy. I just can't hang out for this. Like God. But. That's funny that that this one form caps out at such a relatively low number before you start to feel like you lose. Nets me, you know I. Mean Guys like do arenas you know and they but I still think a lot of. That's a cash. Grab I. Mean who the fuck would go. See Comedy at a football states. What I don't understand is just the idea of like. When you would have when there was that stretch where all these people were playing Madison, Square Garden and the like. I think the Louis and Amy Schumer and everybody was like like got to do the garden right like they were doing the golf and it's just like. That's what is that fifteen thousand people for stand up thing if you're not even doing the back was if it's over ten so. It just feels like. There's there's just such A. There's such a ceiling on any kind of connection. You could have just based on the. Right, but you're doing different kind of thing. Your jokes I can't like I like room so I can fuck off you know and and and find something new you know, but if you're tight and your jokes land like you in order to do that size room, your jokes have got to land strong. Yeah, you can't just. You can't be thoughtful you you can't be. Be Lyrical really yeah, yeah, yeah, because then you're gonNA. Come to the end of it and people are going to be like. Is it done you know so? You know like you'll notice that. Most of those guys did do the big rooms they're they're going to. You know everything boom boom ball yet says it's gotta be. It's like the equivalent of just like. Just, you have to. It's like like if you're gonNA be a band playing there you have to keep your thing has to translate. Yes to the whole room and they play the hits. Man You know what I mean like. Yeah, he's just got to land and I I could do it and I've gotten better at doing those oddball things for twenty thousand people and when I do it I'm like jokes do I. Know Close strong in a lot of guys. That's all they think about like everything like, but some of my jokes. Are you know they're? They're not, it's not. They don't close strong. Would they go a different direction? They're more personal, but you don't. You don't really have that option there now. I know when you're in a place like that. You're not seeing that anything. That's subtle can read as not working right right, which is just such a crazy thing, but that's the way that is the nature thing, but with music. It's amazing that there's like. There's no ceiling on. How big if you're big enough for the people. You can play to two hundred thousand people that people can be playing. Thousand People Works. Yeah because it's music magic. Yeah, because everybody has the relationship with different, but the song and they can listen to it over and over again. Yeah, and yeah, they're just all amazed. It's just it's a whole different thing, but it's so funny. When they first started having bands at Madison Square Garden, Remember. I was talking to Terry Reid who is opening in band opening for cream or somebody I think. Okay and when him and Clapton got into Madison Square Garden and they were walking around like looking at it marveling at it, because they'd seen Sonny Liston, fight their on television. Yeah, it wasn't because bands at Blair. Traditional, boxers. So funny, it's because it's an all purpose. Entertainment Centre, right? We're just like yeah, we'll have a we'll have. Elvis is GonNa be here and then there's going to be. The Knicks are going to play a game. He Morrow. And we're going to a hockey game in here. It's just like everything. Yeah, if that was worth about Carnegie Hall that had to realize to like as mythic is that place is most of the time. It's not filled, you know. It's it's. Saturday, Afternoon Concert Series Yeah Yeah! Yeah it's you know it's a Persian fiddle player. you know. But. I'm not saying that's bad, but I'm just saying. which way to it like Carnegie Hall, but no one ever goes there. It's the way they run things every day. Have four times a week and they're like only got twelve people in there. For the Persian dances functional e concert hall where it just like. We to do something here. The worst part about that night was like outside of me, not feeling great about it. Was You know we? Have I. had my management scrambled to get. Cats is for everybody and put it in a room there. I wasn't told that you know if we're there. After a certain hour, they gotta pay the Union overtime also like there was all this meat upstairs, and we all go into this room. And all these people came up and they're like. You gotta get out uh-huh. What's going to happen? Yeah? It was rushed. I didn't realize that the rest of what was just. We don't want to pay them anymore. Yeah, you gotta get out and then mean you walked ninety blocks. Yeah, and in Nape arquette's. He gave me some dip I. Remember I was had a skull packing and you and were decompressing Yeah, that was exciting. I was just like took the walk seeing that whole thing and just you kinda you Kinda like doing a post game thing after it was very flattering that you asked me to be there, it was such it was a special night I didn't feel. You said you recorded it, so it's not like I can't release it. I have it somewhere. I haven't heard time I listen to it. That'll be in your box that it'll be in. The box said I thought standard. I've talked to swizzle about putting him out. He's got most of my records. You put them all out, but like do is comedy really like that? There was some records I've done like. Final engagement seems to resonate with some people because it's like it's such a dark, angry record, and I recently talked to Louis Cats. WHO's a comic? He's going through a break up and he's like I listened to. That I think it was helpful, and it was like one of these records were Mike. I'm going through that separation. I'm heartbroken angry. I can barely keep my fucking. Santa together and I call up Schuessel, who does recording I say I, think I got something you should just meet me in Seattle with the Shit. and. He did and I got the worst comedy club in the world. Who Work there? Okay? We taped like four shows of me, just sort of like in the darkest place in my life and it exists in the world yeah. Well, let's and now it's. It's how people that are going through Harper. Yeah, you made! That's the comedy equivalent of some of these records. xactly well, this is fun. This is great. To have a crash from the coffee. Yeah, no, that's that's how would work I think we got a lot done? John Take Care of yourself you to stay safe, right? Tom Sharp Wing. You can hear Tom if you go to the best show archive as I said. Earlier at the best show dot net, or you can listen to his new podcasts. With Julie Klausner, it's called double threat. You can get that wherever you get podcasts. Dimension mentioned that I'm getting fat and Tom and I. As I told you earlier about the gift basket from Patent Tom and I just pulled out of the brownies, cookies, and the brittle and the other thing. and. Tom and I became human garbage cans. No one says garbage is good as Tom Sharpen. Now I will attempt some some finger picking. On a loud distorted. Telecast. Okay! Man. Do. Hey, don't forget. Nothing lasts forever, but for some itchy allergy sufferers. It seems like allergies never ends. If you've had it with rubbing, your allergy is all the time you need today. Once daily relief padded contains the number one prescribed allergy relief ingredient, and now it's available without a prescription with today. Just one drop once a day works fast and lasts all day relief. Season is here to stay. Get Pat Today online in stores everywhere.

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60. Give me my drink even though I am sleep

Hannibal Buress: Handsome Rambler

58:08 min | 1 year ago

60. Give me my drink even though I am sleep

"Yeah. We rolling. Yeah. No, no. That's not less Ness. This. This is talk to the folks talk to the people. No, no, drums. No, no. You know, we own gotta do note. Now was happening. Sabal bars. Hey, I'm I'm Tony trim. What was I'm just I was concerned. What you might stay legs about the fall off the table, man. I see listened out. I'm good man is not see that's was wrong with people fill. I I got this. So yeah, man, I'm living life differently now. Yeah. Going into the twenty nineteen can you explain to the to the fans what's going on here. Well, I started. I started sleeping with a asleep mask, and it was helping it helped my quality asleep. Now, I felt great in the mornings this three three nights in a row sleep. Mass sleep woke up feeling fresh. Usually, what does leave masterful? Yeah. Couple of times I used it for. For psychedelic reasons is too low. Yeah, fun. But no sleep though. Yeah. I mean, purpose sometimes not sometimes like I've done it. A couple of times, I use an ear plugs. Is great man. I felt I felt I felt powerful when I woke up in the morning. With this off of sleep alone. Usually when I wake up. I don't feel powerful until I play some some oh red man songs did not feel powerful. Awesome. Oh jazz. But this leapt is quality sleep. And then I got into the sleep mask world started Google in the benefits leave masks, and I'll say what if I've been doing. Got upset. Dammit. If I was getting quality sleep mass sleep. For all of my twenties. I have a hundred million dollars by now. Blame it on a quality must leave. But isn't that too late? Bounce back. So. Try to extend it further just to see his okay sleep mass help you. I you sleep. Well, I wanna keep this going. How sleep mass help you when you awake too. So I started going around house asleep mask on doing. My chores, walling doll grabbing a male. Dr. Just to check just to test the limits of my Billy's shepherd up. My other Billy's, you know, doing doing text, text, by voice voice techs. Not you have to be. So hey Siri. Was Greg in message kill Stovall. Never mind. So yeah, I just. Been rolling. With the mask on for the past hours change in in his in this the change my life for the better. Did she try with like earplugs to then you get the whole experience? That's but then what what am I trying to do the the Helen Keller experience? I'm just sitting in a room that not still wanna live life. I don't wanna net here is all touch you have to just touch everything as smell smell touch. And then I'm not even am I even dealing with other human beings. What am I doing is the Helen Keller experience now, man? No, all right. No. I'm not. Gestion? Yeah. That's crazy. Around with asleep fast hour, having crazy. No. No, why not just go all the way, man. That's Dan all the way because then I can't hear then what I'm supposed to listen to jazz. You make the jazz. No, jazz jazz is in your in your in your rhythm wall. Listen, don't see this is what happens when when you try to I've seen this happen time time again, and I seen in the movies when you try to progress in your life. People don't accept your progress. They try to diminish it say will you way been blind. And deaf. Let me just be blind. Hum. Full. Who? Who? Who who had? So I I had a theory says I've been hearing impaired not hearing impaired impatiently, I think I'm actually a slight that here impaired. But my hearing is diminishing because of years of nightlife and being close to speakers in like, but on the bright side. I think about a time I need hearing aids. They're going to be really dope. They already pretty dope and in kind of low key. But do you ever watch shows and shit with the close captioning on? When they accents. What? Oh, yeah. Yeah. When you watch peaky blinders them, some non yes some show. We would have a. The big accent? Sometimes it could be a regular show with American access if you over files at a house, and in their being be at Kohl's captured on sometimes I just leave it on and realize not taking much way from the experience, you know. Well, okay. It's that I do it all because I like to watch I like to watch stuff on cooking. So when that when that when that skill is start sizzling, I can't hear no more. But they'll see. So I I have the closed caption offer that. Yeah. That's how it used to be. When I cooking dope. Cooking adult cooking dope. And I could hit jeopardy while cooking dope. The dotes visited the pot of a boy. Than all, the crack spill into my potted soil, then my plant. Oh, here's what I was thinking about. I want to experiment. Yeah. Potted plants to potted plants. Over time one that I water and treat out the book say you're supposed to water and treat a plant and other one I just p. And see how they grow. Well. The one UPN is going to die all the ammonia from your piss buddy. But I did we tie in July. What? Anybody? Do it. You've Piz is still your this ause. Listen. Okay. Forget about that one. All right. Yeah. You know, I actually. I mean, I don't know. I can't because my dog pisses on the same plant outside the front of the crib every day. And that plant is dead is fucked. But I mean was the rest of that plants treatment plan what else is going on with that plan. You're not monitoring that plant all the plans around. It is doing fine. It's just that plant. But that's the plan to my dog always pisses on. I mean, his thing I've been to your place, Tony and your neighborhood. Is in the midst of an opioid crisis. So. Who knows was been dropped by plant, man. I like I like the way you worded that you just said, and there's people shooting up on the corner. Opioid. So anyways. Yeah. You know, I have a great idea. I think you should get a green sleep mask. And that we should do an episode where like we can do like. Yeah. Googly is like fuck with your is. So like when you get when you say something while you get excited, the is get real wide. And then like that would be dope as fuck actually put just a different, you know, classic films films going on like just Pulp Fiction plan on your face face off face very on the nose. Oh, that's very on those two. Oh, that was a double that was back to back back to back. Man to man. Man. About that that that that that when it? That's more thing. When people who who started that knock. But that that. I don't know. I find out how do you even how do you even Google that? That's voice, Google, right? Google who made up that that that that that are they causes is that? Yeah. That's that's royalties for that. No. As public domain like the birthday zone. But don't don't don't that. Dodo? Yeah. I think that's the birthday song. Right. Yeah. All right is December thirty of today. December thirtieth almost twenty nineteen. Yeah. God damnit, man. It's actually ten minutes. Still New Year's Eve ten minutes to new us in Hawaii. Hawaii starting New Year's Eve. Yeah. At the crab. I'm almost one year. Now, drink it, man. Congratulations. Second on January second I'll be of one year. As crazy. No sauce. I'm hived about it. I don't know what I wanna do for the second. Standing water. Yeah. Go may I wonder do I even wanna get drunk anymore? I they should keep go. I don't I don't really want to get drunk anymore. Oh, you wait. You don't wanna get drunk? No more. No. But then part of me was what should I celebrate a year by getting drunk and seeing that I wanna do it. No more just keep it going. You should just go like balls out on some Wasco now. Oh, no, no. I waspa-. No, I waspa- you think you think. You think Martin Luther King evidence psychedelics? Nah. I don't think. So. They would've really jammed him up. They found out maybe Malcolm, X mitre. I thought he might have fucked with some acid. He got that. You know, he kinda got that, you know, acid vibe that rebelliousness, you know, you do acid, and then you're like damn the man type shit. So I could see him, but not Martin Luther can't use to religious for that stuff super religious. Yeah. And so I'm trying to what's your what's your twenty nineteen. Intentions and goals intentions and goals. Why definitely want to get back into shape? Yeah. Lose a little weight, and I want I'm how much. About seventy five pounds. All right. Was the action plan for that? Just watch a lot of Bruce Lee movies and do tons of pushups. Is only pushups man if I did like think about it man dig about this. If I did pushups every day. Yeah. I'd be fucking ripped up in like three months. Absolutely. That's what I'm saying. Fuck all this workout gym membership shit a thousand pushups day regular push ups or what you push up in class. And then whatever my body lets me do the one handed fucking flip over any know much do any tricep dips. I was something else. Now, just push them to balance the push push ups, squats know crunches. No, just pushed us push. All right. I'll just have a crazy body. Also and chest. But that means I can do handstand push ups too. Oh, and as next level. Okay. Pushups now, I've just play. No. I mean, I do like jail workouts shit like push up some pull ups right visit ups, if you could do if you could do a hundred each every day, I feel like you get into shape pretty good, right? If he did one hundred pushups hundred sit ups will not one hundred pull ups if you do one hundred pull ups, you got an fucking beast. Maybe like if I can get to at least twenty pull ups shit man on it crunches and squats. Not one hundred seconds running in place. I don't need to do squats because I do like kung-fu forms and stuff and it uses a lot of leg muscles. So when I do that like that's more than of legwork. So I don't need to do squats. My apologies to this squad family for his disrespect is that the opinion said on here do that reflect the opinions of everybody's. So yeah, that's what I'm thinking for. Yeah. Same thing. I want to try to just even if I don't make it to class or the gym do a hundred hundred hundred hundred hundred hundred club on it day. And then see how that works and call it the while hundred plan while hunting playing hunted. Hunted crunches on the I have workout a hundred squat hunt jumps jumping jacks hundred Zack's and a hundred sips of water high sips of water and a hundred seconds jogging and place hundred grams of creating and some amino acid protein protein Downer labs around your crib? Wherever you live. No matter how small the building do a hundred labs around because you need cardiovascular work to within. It depends on type of hundred jumping jacks jumping Jack hundred Zaks is easy. Yeah. You know, a song? I've been listening to that. There's a good workout song is off of the creed to soundtrack. Kill them with success. Okay. Is a super it's a hype workout song. I listen to you. I listen to like podcast when I work out Siri play kill them with play killer whisk sess off the Cree to soundtrack. We could probably just cut it in now want to I want to people to see my struggles. Seri-? Play killing was success of the Cray two soundtrack. Well that in work. So that's a good goal. Tony little seventy five pounds. Nominee. I obviously I was exaggerating I five pounds. But man, you know, get get get Bruce Lee rip. I I don't think I could ever lose his gut though like I was born with it. And I've always had it worked out before to try to get rid of it and Don all kinds of stuff. And the good the good just won't go. I don't think that's a good attitude, rather, you know, you know, you know, how you can get that gut to go. Stop drinking poison stop drinking that boys. Boys. That's how you do it. I can't give up potion God give up the post in in that cut the gut out. Can't give potion man. Like, I gotta figure out a plan where I could count the calories and make up for it. Because I just can't I can't give up like tonight. I cooked up a nice steak. Yeah. Nice cab Sav next to it. Got the potion got emotions call wine. I like to find line. Yeah. But you know. Yeah. That's a classic Lear. Good. Hot dog town catch up just crusted faster. Bust. How we eat it. You can make bed. I'll beat your price. That's how I got emotions got the boatswain. Call wine. I like the fine dining hotel lows. What the hot and sweet peppers. Oh, that's right. Claxton classically yours, but you don't have to you. Don't have to live the stuff. I live as your life. My lyrics, man. I'm bro. Chain people say talk about do shit. Not do it. I read my shit, son. I remember, you know, bun beat bun b he made pregnant pussy. That's true either. The looks back on what was I don't could be like you with the wind rep that life, man. I used 'bout that life. You know, songs talk about just my old life with the with the drinking and the partying and and hopping out of taxicabs without paying I don't do that anymore though. I'm sorry. I hopped out without paying. I thought it was an Uber. Got confused. So my my thing for twenty nineteen your thing, I'm filling my special. February second. So I think that's a good day to 'cause 'cause you stay on your shit for the month of January. So as good to do something early February. So yeah, I'm a really get into it getting shape, I've been all right on it. But I didn't have been thoroughly consistent all the time to do some bootcamp shed bother just really get after it. And just, you know, do the HANA on it. Try to do a few yoga classes a week. Do some do a couple cycling classes a week maybe couple box and. Do some I wanna get I want to be in great physical shape. I want my pacing. Side of the stage to side of the stage. I wanted to be very fluid. I might take to adult gymnastics classes, I'm up into NASA classes, which best and I asked that that you don't look at me differently. Because of me not being able to see in gymnastics class man, just helped me to the trampoline. As it. Okay. All right. You're about to go in did. I just didn't wanna you know, I want to you know, to lead them one in more. And I felt like I hit the peak, and I could've kept going. But I didn't wanna stretch out the premise to that firm. Too much. You got the mask on the automatic -ly on blackout mode. You should just be ready. Like blackout every time. Every time you gotta pace is out. You can't go full speed every time, you know, what? I mean, a fighter prize fighter. Don't just go. Crazy every round he might go crazy route to round one round three. But then around four five six he Chiloe bit concerned some energy around seven round eight he my diarrhea little bit. 'cause he's nervous. And it's a huge crowd then nights around ten eleven. And then they bring it back. You know, not if a dog fight, they just go at it. And that talking about dogs. And they don't dogs on a twelve round fight. No. They just go on these off jump. Wait fight. Is you on record supporting dogfight? Nah. I was saying is that what you're doing right now. Are you? I've I've never okay ASPCA jello. Never. To say, don't worry. I'm going to edit this out because I can't be next to you. Mike, y you sit. No, I can't even I'm not even going to risk it. I can't even be a part of this trying to take me down. Hannibal supports a dog fighting legend now and find out Tony doing underground dogfights. Yeah. On big island in qui-. That's why really took the gig. Now, then I'll be I'll be already did can check in on my stub checking over there. Dogfights and thing be good. How about that for your twenty nineteen resolution? No more dogfight yet out of the dog fighting games. Talking about push ups and sit. Being a felon. How about you stop being a felon? Swain nineteen be better person. My other one is I want to start practicing instrument. Oh, yeah. You wanna get into like musical theory. I to play drums, okay? Do you want like are you trying to hit drums or are you trying to learn I on drums? I don't want to get their e into it. I thought about like numbers like, you know, like three freidan music shit. No, like, just no one like the timing. And all that like this is a five four beat three or four. Nassar counts rhythm innate, because I'm a musical genius. Okay. Yeah. All right. I just wanted. I just need to learn just give my wrists loose. Really? I'm a natural. But I just need to get the muscle memory going. You know, because most beach, you know, are like four four eight ages. But then when you start fucking with like one two three one two three one two three. That's when things get weird. That would like can you get down with that? That was as far as class goals. I forget there. Most pop music one. You know, sing along. So I know it because then. What give familiar song? So I know it. Beat that bitch with a bat beat that bad. That's like a four four eight. Do it Duke song, but that's classically house as classic. But that's like a pop song that. Juke song. How about? Two. Duda. Duda. Dodo? Oh to go around here is Michael Jackson. Yeah. Wow. Was I wasn't you know? But you know, I thought you would get it off of the melody. So yes, take a drumming class. And then like learn a language, but I I got this Abdul lingo on my phone. I'm gonna try to learn Spanish is fast as I can't. Wanna kinda speed through Spanish couple of months, hopefully, and then get into the Chinese. Title. Why Chinese cause they've out the run everything I want to be able to communicate with them. And I think by you think because I have tiny is if I talked to the right person that might have seen tag. I convince them to let me in on their deals, and I can invest right behind him just a little bit, you know, a little fraction of what they invest. I throw in a few stacks and just build with them. So I feel like learning language with really helped me get past area. Let's get your logic straight here. So because you have slanty is as that you Lanny. Say slanty. You for being as tiny. Yes. Okay. So you should learn the language, right? Because you're slanty is. No, that's not what I said. And you you being a bad listener on purpose. Okay. Okay. Okay. Tiny is. So I might be able to pass phrase Chinese or part Tiny's. So because of that, I should learn Cinese. And then maybe somebody does a Chinese fan with some influence in the country's investments will help me get involved with those investments, but which Chinese you try to learn can't can't unease or Mandarin Mandarin because I like, orange juice. Don't you wanna learn the type that's more like business-minded or is it just oranges? You're going off oranges like one like Mandarin wages. So that's the one. I didn't know that way. So one is more business in one is more. Yes. Because like, yo there's there's northern China in southern China. Okay. So whatever part you on was most business going down. That's probably the one that you wanna learn this, man. It's a billion of come on man, if I learn Mandarin Ave to find a plug. I won't be out of the entire loop. Tell me no business people that speak Mandarin. They're very out of billions, you'll be surprised a very different man, Mandarin Cantonese, very different. But I'm saying they'll be some business people that speak Mander. They're business people that speak both. They business people. They need to speak to a lot of people, and they speak English to the top business people, but I'll speak Chinese the soda. Make an effort, so drums, Chinese Spanish, workout, more and a pet. I think you should get a pet. Man. It's time for you to be responsible for another life. Child. I get like a Tyler Guana. I in no pet. I get no pets. So I I know. I know pet cobby travel that have no pet. I I rather late. No rappers wit up pet is that the bucks. I it. No, a Ghana's. No fish, no doll. No cats. No hamsters. No llamas. No res-. I get no pet. I get no pet. Not not not not and get no monkeys nor in our snus Napoleon goes, no cyclops. I'm getting no pets. Don't call the cops. I get no pets. Yes. No fat thousand dollars to the vet. I get no pet. No, Tweety Burs noth times dares. Nope. No, no, no enemy acts. No, no. No. I get no pets. No buffalo. No don't know cheetahs. No, no, no Burs. No, no, no, high years. I getting no pets and get no pets. No pets. I get no pets, no pets. No pets. I get. No pets. Yeah. It wasn't until you spasms out at the end just. I was going off your energy, man. I was still go. I was I doubt very jarring to as a visually impaired person. In the pocket in the pocket, vibrant. You know, never really seeing anything. That was my Edney and you just decided songs over while. I feel like there was on the Pakalitha. Wow. Great great collaborative energy there. She's christ. I take it back. Stevie Wonder isn't overrated. Imagine as blind person trying to get people on your wavelength musically. We came make eye contact keep that going. Kiss. Gotta keep doing. He's. That's why. That's why does the why does that? Yeah. 'cause he like mother conduct. Stay on the harmonica other. That's how you do. Yeah. Well, you got to do that. And I find that. When you not man, give me give me something like swing your hand around or something. No, just on the drums. Never moved never move fade out lightly. Why not like dress started faded out? And then if I stopped, and I stopped or if I keep ramp you could bring it back in but going that's like I just wanted you to scream maybe scream. Like, get primal, you know. You hit stop. Does you him? His that already was a hit man you make as many. Then I vote Dan when you blind and angry. You get really angry because anger you just you'll you'll get to like look off distract yourself. Or even you'll look at you. Phones, it which are just kinda sit. I guess you hop on a phone at yo this folk you believe even. You gotta just stay with you. Yeah. You can't look at off. You gotta kinda just. Phil this mov. Oh. Madam side. I'm side. I guess it would have been different. If. See didn't that feel good? Feel better now. I feel a little bit better. I know you feel a little better. So yeah, I want to get a safe special languages music, and then yeah. Just more read and more to do more audio books. Maybe an audio book a week. Fuck audio book books what I'm not gonna say that might get like audiobook sponsors or some shit. Be what I don't know. People are the podcast audio books. Feel like they're in the same world. You know what I'm saying? I'm not gonna talk shit. I just don't like audio books like reading. I don't even like that. Fuck it in PDF fucking e books shit. I like paper books I like paper books too. But I audio book just because. You kind of put it on before you go to sleep. And then. Follow if you fall asleep. Not as my senior, Brian Brian is advanced computer, it can absorb you can absorb knowledge why you sleep, and then, you know, situation pop-up, you'd think you don't know that the pop up, and then you spouting out facts. Nineteen seventy seven when that happened. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Fell asleep fell asleep with Bernie MAC book. Yeah. I've been I'm so I'm gonna do like maybe one audio book a week with an one regular book every two weeks. And and then as in star bag drinking in March. Now, you don't mean that. You don't mean that right now, you don't mean start that. Yeah. In March though. I like the sober Hannibal. Well. Things about the change brother about the spiral. Ow. Yeah. South by south west. That's the plan. Oh, I'll just have one. How does have one? He's gonna be fine. Everybody. How does have one? Fast forward hour and a half later. While while while while I like doll. A lot at all while on the dance floor. Jokin? Which I served off. Shirt off. Just. See hand signals they out they work. The. So on a dance floor yelling drunk sweaty. Surrounded by millennials, taken Snapchat videos of me, doing a dark moment. I see the cover of ultra MAG. The next day. How bars naked south by south west? We thought he was so. I mean, if you're going to get back on that alcohol, you'd better be careful because. That your tolerance is not like you're gonna be drinking. I mean, that's like how heroin addicts OD tell like, oh, yeah. I used to do this shit. All. Yeah. Did I gotta be careful. Well. Y. Yeah. Man. You gotta start with like like half like quarter pours at work. You can't just go right into the fucking got. Jamison would a splash ginger. You can't do that. You gotta go on slow. I'm going to Dominican Republic. A wobble wobble. Wop? What what what what? I still support sober have what? What what? And so yet as the as the three month plan. Shorter was long term for twenty nineteen twenty nineteen. What has to be done before? Twenty twenty comes around. Will. I wanna go to one of those laboratories, it's our your poop into drinkable water. Okay. And I wanna do that with my poop. Why why is that a long-term? Can't you just do that tomorrow? No, why not is that is the technology. Not there yet. No tomorrow holiday. Okay. So why can't you do that like next week? I got goods. But that's like all you gotta do shit and put it in the bag and send us somewhere. Right. Not. Are you saying that you want to do it yourself or you saying that you want your shit to be turned into consumable water? I wanted to be turned into water by somebody else. Right. Yes. So why can't you just shit in a fucking ziplock bag and send it out as not you can't we send your shit. That's a threat. If is not. I'm. I'm not saying that's like hazardous waste. What can't you ended? Can't you hit up like a spot after I want to you have to do it in purpose? And you have to do it in person. And it's appointment only and backed up for months. So that's why it's end of the year thing, and they don't care about my movie career. So I can't skip the line, and I respect their process. Mazo maybe that's happening in November. Maybe the lines not backed up in the people in line are backed up. All right. Sorry. Bad. I just had to put that was there was there. You know? Sometimes I wish I was I could've saw the light in your eye right before you say you'll see there was a glow. Like, I like like I like that that I. That's kinda is is funny. Dragged just talk about to the half zanex Bacchus leave it on a flight. But I guess the production is so dope. About that too. You know, what I'm glad that you brought that up because I thought about that. I'm like, that's literally probably the most born shit that you could talk about an RAB song. Like, I ate something that puts me to sleep and I fell asleep on an airplane. Watching our to our land out like a light like a life any repeats it like a life. Like, I get you eight asleep. Bill went to sleep on a plane. Like, isn't that exciting? It's that's the like literally the most Boris shit is more exciting. On a plane out on a long flight. And then I went to coach and what up to everybody like gave them high five. I'm dry. I went up to everybody said, I'm Drake and gave them five and we got real. That's what was I woke up sleeping people. That's it. Yeah. I like that saw. But that I always questioned that part. Like, I don't I'm like, why are you talking as this relatable, though? That's maybe that's the thing is then oh because most rappers talk about like a party drug, which I still don't understand. And then he's talking about van like how it actually works. It just puts you to sleep. So he's talking about like, the the real real effective. Maybe he's trying to just change the narrative about Xanax, and what in a more reasonable. You know, what if that's got a lot of respect for Drake all of a sudden because that's what I'd do if I ever take when I take zanex. It's like, oh, I gotta go to bed, and I feel a little atvs lot of shit going on in my head. Right. I'm gonna pop the Zan so slows down go to sleep outside a light. Right. Yeah. So maybe yeah. He's trying to just show a sponsor will use because he said he took a half of one half a bar. That's milligram. Have of Zan one because he knows how strong it is. And just have good for you, man. Tell the kids tell the kids all you need is a half or a fourteen hour flight. As what took to career took half a one where you out like a light. I was out out out like a man that yells in his sleep. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah yet. Yeah. As me, and I'm yelling in my sleep. Give me a drink. But I'm sleep. Doozy. Give me the drink. When I yell at 'em. I sleep does. He get a drink. If I yell order in my sleep will see Brits me of what she think, I'm sleep. We'll see look at my eyes and see that they are close, oh, wishy rigor my drink. And 'cause I said it so bring me my drink, even though I am sleep my eyes clo-. But I still can't think I'm not doubt. But I still am talking seatbelt on. So I'm Nestle Walcott down is Wrigley. My drink. Yeah. Am sleep. But I might. Beat up. So Jess bring me that gender rail and is in a Cup. What? Yes. So thanks, right. Thanks for being reasonable, Drake. Shot out shit. A sit up shot outs to twenty twenty eighteen stuff that you liked what you like in two thousand eighteen twenty eighteen like anything. What did you like what I like allied, gone Africa? Okay. That was fun west Africa East Africa not to. Legos we should get into your Africa experience like deeply own another episode. We will we have some you got some good stories to stories to stories. They true stories they gentile and a few stories. What else did I like, what did you like in twenty eight teen? I the film's any good films. I didn't see as many movies as TV show. I never see as many movies as I feel like. I guess in my head. I have this idea that I should be watching. For movies. In the theater, but then I remember that I don't like acting. So I don't need to. Watch that many for research. Did you see that bohemian rhapsody? I didn't you didn't. I did not wasn't that good, bro. No wasn't that good rolling. Stones critic. Chris Travers said it was a riot and emotional roller coasters. So he's tripping and also. Ain't it. Cool. News said to it was. Wow. That was just a review. Wow. What Tony trim says shit was kinda wack. I know you. I mean, I could get into it. But you know, how I get about ranting about films. So he Rafter the that's the that's the doesn't Rickles story. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was about Michael's. And that song that he wrote. But he me and rhapsody the Galileo. Yeah. Yeah. It was a bit in the song. Nice. Recipe's, Don Rickles. He stay working pretty pretty light. He must have loved it. He was still working is ninety still tour and a little bit. What is what they know? What how what way way way down wriggles was torn in Don Rickles was nineties. You said I'm Rickles probably had tour dates on the books when he died ninety I wear. How was he when he died? Motherfucker ninety. Nineties. So what I think he was actually ninety okay? That's siri. Okay. This is gonna take fifteen minutes. You want me to just? No, no, no, no. I got it. Don't. Don't treat me like a charity case two nights. Don't treat me like a journey tries. Theory. No, drums. See we can't hear the drones kit. Kick can't you got have phones on. Maybe hear through the headphones. Stop real quick. I'm still distract. Hey sued. How was down record when he died. Is it baby? Saying all my screen your trip and says, I'm listening just keep saying, I'm listening. I don't know Siri. How was Don Rickles when he died. Don, Rickles died April sixth two thousand seventeen at eight ninety Beverly him. You're right on. Yeah. Yeah. So he was working now. He was. Yeah. That's crazy. What about wasn't Rodney Dangerfield working late to as an old, man? 'cause I remember him being he didn't get how I think. Roddy didn't seventies his seventies. Thank you feel. The old. Do it again who who did you like better as a comic, Don Rickles or Rodney Dangerfield? I'll tell you Sega Siri how Rodney Dangerfield when he died. Tuber two thousand four age eighty two in west eighty two. So he was up there too. Yeah. As a comic. I mean, I got to see more of. Rickles, you know. Yeah, he was still doing rose than popping up on a talk shows shit. He was still doing hell appearances. But wasn't Rodney like in more and more movies. When more like a movie movie guy than a comic. He did a couple movies what he was on lady. No, I didn't see lady he plays a soccer coach, but it's a female soccer team. So he's gotta be a lady coach. It's pretty it's pretty funny. It's like, MRs Doubtfire soccer. It's good. It's a classic. Yeah. It's not good. But it's it's funny 'cause Rodney Dangerfield is a classic. I heard of it's it's a classic for me. But I like movies dumb movies like that. Okay. You know, I. So so what you're saying? Is that I shouldn't trust your opinion about him your recipe. No, no, you should trust my opinion about the well, actually, actually, actually, okay. I'm a big Queen fan. I'm really into that ban as so like, I know the history of the bad really, well, and then I felt like the movie just didn't do the band Justice at I think I think they were like. There are two they didn't know whether they're making a movie about Freddie, Mercury or the ban or that God damn song. Right. So it's like, okay. Make a movie about one one of those things. But you can't condense all three of those things in the one fucking movie. Just can't like that should have been like fuck in damn three season fucking TV show. I watch you talk. I watched it. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And so you kinda you kinda are. Putting your opinion kind of trying to poison my perspective here, and you know, I can't have it because you just pitched me a cross dressing soccer coach movie. Valid. Point valid point valid point what I didn't go into ladybugs thinking like your man, I'm really in the soccer women's soccer team teenage women soccer teams with a good coach. I don't know nothing about soccer. I just like Dangerfield in the flick. And it was good, right? It was goofy. Like that. I didn't go in with any expectations. But you're writing a BI you're doing a biopic about a very influential rap band. You gotta you gotta you. Gotta you gotta you gotta go. It's got to be really good. And it's got to be probably super like, I feel I feel bad. Like, I'm not gonna even like knock on it. Because it's just. I feel like they just Hollywood probably just didn't give give them enough time to like to really justify, you know, the ban. So Queen welcome to the jungle right? No guns and roses. Now quaint we will rock you. We are the champion clean. Did. They did. Pour. Some sugar on me. Right. No. Okay, queen. You're just think you just name all the hair hair metal bands now way, so clean. We are the champions my friends. Queen did how soon is now. Okay. That's a that's a cut. If that's if I don't know that's a cut then I don't know Queen. Oh, okay. I mean, but that's like the big, you know, everybody knows the the all Queen. They did play that funky music. Why not you just fucking around house around whole time. But you know, what my favorite my favorite Queen song was probably the one the joint David Bowie that vanilla ice sampled for ice is baby. Yeah. Dum dum. Dum. That's a ill baseline though, you gotta admit. That's a that's a pretty heavy baseline. Oh. Oh. Sells ov- cells ov- in the show. The is mess yourself in the show in the so you cut the cameras cut the cameras. Are we done?

Don Rickles Tony trim Google Rodney Dangerfield red man soccer Helen Keller Bruce Lee Dan Drake Michael Jackson Billy Kohl Queen Africa Martin Luther Queen gymnastics
World Famous Comedian Mike Marino

Ten Items or Less

46:11 min | 2 months ago

World Famous Comedian Mike Marino

"Going. Hey, everybody, welcome the hundreds last. I'm your host Tim. Thanks for Click in my link taken. Listen taken a shot on me. Thank you so much while the comments and feedback, you guys have been sending me. Please keep it coming to ten items or less podcasts. The G mail DOT COM today I have a very special episode so special. I want you to pause this. Go get a drink. Get yourself a nice comfy chair and listen to the next forty five minutes. I'm going to be having a conversation with the New Jersey. Bad boy if you don't believe me Google. That the New Jersey Badboy. You'll see that we're going to have a conversation with Mike Marino the world famous. Comedian the guy's been around twenty seven years inducted to the comedy hall of Fame Back in two thousand eight. He has an amazing show long right now on Youtube. Please check him out. We're to talk about how he got started what he's doing right now and then all the in between. I. Hope You guys really enjoy it. It's going to be a Lotta Fun. Awesome Man Mike? Thank you so much for joining the show. This I've been waiting for this all week. I'm super excited. like you and I talked a little bit off the air before I hit record. You and I share a a lot in common after I read your bio and got to know a little bit about you We're both I. believe correct me if I'm wrong. Born in New Jersey correct. Rate Jersey City on Gotch plane down Belmar Alvin. Well, yeah. I'm in Austin Texas. So if you can real quick just give me a quick synopsis or The listeners, a quick synopsis of who you are your age. Your Life Kids, no kids, whatever? Okay I'll put it out there I'M GONNA TALION COMEDIAN I've been in show business from about thirteen years old. Fifty five years old now, never married I have no. Very. Happy with my life on the cloud. They're looking case. Anybody in Texas was like. Nice journey bed with. I. I'd like to the people in Texas, Halley US doing. How you doing so I? I work with a bunch of people, Mike. That are from Texas I've been. I've been in Texas a few different times. I've lived here, but now I work with four hundred and fifty people a day and I say things like you guys, and those things and people look at me. Like what the Hell Are you talking about? So I can only imagine you living in La. Do you get the same thing? Being the shot of waters, what really works in the exchange business because I actually have blonde hair and blue eyes? My parents who really are in so I. Don't look Italian at all. What I did was I developed the knack out need just being myself being coming Hind family misplaced in Los Angeles and makes people, Laugh and anybody that right especially talking about just family in general I get a lot of taxes I hope I get to go back out there. When the Doors Open Hampton, colder I love to go back to Texas again. A loved it. There's a lot to do. Here is like I said I live in Austin. my wife and I. We lived in Dallas a few times in Houston now we live in Austin. We live a few of the major cities in Texas, and they're all uniquely different, but nothing is different than New Jersey and I and I mean that in a good way. I left there and went to college and never returned, but my brother and his wife still lived there. My Mom and dad moved out of their day. Now live in Florida which we call the New Jersey of the south right. And that's where we all end up. And that's typically where we all go on vacation all the time, but as far as your life. And how long did you were you in New Jersey the whole time? Technically, I still live half. My life injured right bought the house I grew up in around high forty from my mom dad about fifteen years ago when they start to get old. Movement on here so I took over the family couch and My mom got. Till the. Older and older and my hat and my father lives in the area, but I still own. The House will have placed him on changeless that place in New Jersey and up until three months ago, pretty much mother. Back, and forth back and forth. I'm sure and we'll get into the three months of the COVID nineteen mess here. I'm sure I would imagine anyway. You'll you'll educate us all, but I imagine it's changer your career or your your your path every day from what's going on people like you being locked up or quarantined Texas is starting to open up slowly, but surely but I can be honest with you, even today a prior to me and you going through this recording. Everybody's a little bit nervous. Because the cases are going back up so as much as we've opened all of a sudden, it seems like we may be slowing back up awhile. A nightmare nightmare for so many people in somebody different businesses. And being an entertainment business will be the last people to open up I guess along now Salons Sayi people who? Really know. Why never saw this common I was one of the biggest, comp. Of White kind. Light show words on March. In Leavenworth Kansas. Oh my God I know. Leavenworth Kansas very good, so that's that's crazy so I'm a huge Kansas Basketball Fan. We have season tickets, my wife and I we live in Texas and we go to Kansas about once every month starting November once or twice a week. I'm sorry once a week starting in November, all the way to March, so we go back and Forth Kansas and I've passed that Leavenworth exit all the time. Did you do it at the prison? There's not there's not much out there. It's a cool place though Kansas for sure. Tree there I did get taken around for a little wild look at all the different national landmark and The president was pretty interesting. It go. Get to go. Some pictures on it I went did this show? Show, do then. Right back, Wall. Banjo Back Walsh Angeles. Everybody was like your big Surpri like. Oh my God. It's incredible. Now I've lived a little bit in Los Angeles. I lived rating culver city for about seven months. Obviously, you know where that is yet. I opened I used I used to be in the restaurant bar business, so I worked for a company that opened I. Guess You'd say a franchise out there and I was out there literally just short of a year I've loved it, we have. have some really good friends. My wife and I live out there. One of them works for NFL network right there in culver, so we connect with them every once in a while, California's one of my favorite places but New Jersey obviously to you me, anybody that's really grown up live. There has a special place in my heart, but I could be honest with you. I'm Kinda. Miss Living there is that crazy? No not at all. What of different places in New Jersey that most people got fed up with the move at this stage with like you said they went down to Florida something Jerry people down in Florida. North Carolina and That's all fine and good, but there are some places in New Jersey just just. Just missed so like Jersey shore I? Miss the seasons and the people and more than anything I. Yeah I'm a chef by Trade Mike, and there's no better you know doesn't get much. Credit New Jersey people. Call it New York. New Jersey New York Philadelphia. I'm I'm more of a South Jersey Guy I grew up on the shore. I was born in Tom. I was born in Edison, but I grew up in Toms River brick town. Do you know where to south? Yeah! That's where I grew up my whole life, so it's closer to the shore. My first job was selling umbrellas at the beach. An Jenkinson's and seaside and point pleasant, so I'm sure you associate with all those places and. I miss that a lot I, don't I don't Miss I don't miss the I miss the seasons but I don't miss the the length of the season's. If that makes sense here in Texas today ninety seven. It's. It's way too early to be ninety seven degrees. It's hot I don't think it's rained in literally ten to twelve days. Everything's dying, so it's a little bit of a shock, but but it is nice here. Eleven months of the year so I, mean my wife and I. We can go out on the boat in November. You're not doing that New Jersey. You know what I mean. So so we enjoy that, but being from new, Jersey the food. I'm a very fast paced individual I. Love the pace. I love. That everybody's on the go. I don't have time for this and that we all have an opinion. I grew up at a kitchen table where it was passed the fucking butter. You know that's just how I am you know. When I listened to yes, when I listened to some of your comedy stuff, you're the last couple of days. I'm like Oh my God. This guy sounds like my life now. You're about five years older than me so I know you said how old you were, so this is my big. This is my big year to turn fifty, but very similar backgrounds and very similar. Things in my head that you cover on your. I guess you'd say comedian Skit, but let's get into that real quick. How long have you been? Do you said thirteen years old? You started? How long? Did. When I was thirteen years old, I grew up doing TV commercials. I was on active world turns for a while back in the day when I was in my twenty I did a lot of movies grown up a lot of the shows. I didn't start to. Like turn third. So. Were you a really good looking kid? I'm just asking. I think those are pretty good. Looking Kid. I want had really thick, gorgeous blonde hair Luanne. Above average might. Always in pretty good shape. And Make decision I was even going to keep doing TV commercials in New York City, going down to the Jersey shore more was going to take my life in the business seriously and will Hollywood. Hollywood started some. TV, commercials here doing some TV shows. I. Was pulled twenty. Everybody likes the way I sound. From New Jersey you act the way you talk. That's when I I mean. I, hope I curse on your show on. Absolutely let it go. Let it go my friend. You know I came to California and I started performing at the comedy book and I got on stage night. Actually think no I'm so church you. I didn't know puff was a dirty Barkley. Like. Up. Say it all the time. That is so true and I'm telling you there's so many people in my life that I've met over. Let's say the last eight years and they say oh, my God. Do you say that word a lot? You'll fuck and I'm like. Yeah, like it's just part of life there and and I've learned to control it I don't use it when I'm not supposed to use it, but as I probably already said it's three times and just general conversation. Sometimes, it comes out. My joke that people say to me. Kercheval time you people from the Jersey. You curse upon what the Funky poke about she leave just cursed right there. That's not a current employee of love. You and I don't hurt you sure i. don't like you. Know you're spot on my friend, and like I, said I grew up in a wonderful family. My Mom and dad are still married. I mean fifty something years the greatest of all time we ate dinner. Every night got older brother, a younger sister and we were the ultimate family. We weren't poor. We weren't richest your normal New Jersey family, but it was like what the fuck you doing every day. This is how life was. Car. Mike Bunny thing to people New Jersey courtesy. Head coach. We have wind chill. The clock in the morning. It snows out his ten degrees below zero. You open up your. Own the first word out of your mouth. You're not saying good morning. Warm you. That's amazing. Is this something you think thirteen you've always wanted to do? Is this been your thing? To be in show business of the baby. I wrote my third grade play on always one. Being in the movies always wanted to be on television. Always a hand fraud I. Try and make people laugh for jokes on the. I was a prankster. Junior high. High School all the played. I played drums. The band, so you you're! You're the guy so I was always the social guy like I didn't do great in school like I love school. A lot of people don't love school, even elementary or high school I love it I saw it as a social event I met girls made friends, and I was always having fun, and I was friends with what we would call the nerds. I was friends with the burnout who did drugs? I was friends with the oddballs like I was friends with everybody and I've always wanted in my entire life like you just said to be famous I didn't really think of it as being like. Like in show business, but it makes perfect sense what you're saying and I still have that almost fifty years old. I have not done anything clear or close to what you've done, but I've been on a few reality shows by luck. I've been a few here and there, but my point is. It's just a feeling that you get our at least I. Get when I've done it. Like Oh, my God. I can do this like people are interested in me, so is this something that that you felt like? Was this from your parents and somebody pushed us on you, or how did you get in the mouth and that? No, the pension have nothing to do with his brother didn't. I was the only guy I was always watching television trying to imitate somebody to be like somebody. Wants it'd be Rodney Dangerfield. What beat a bowery boys? But I do, and it's so funny that you said that 'cause. Somewhere down my list here I. Have you know who who who inspired you? And I have like it's got and this is what I wrote for myself. This is no lyle. Even shoot your pitcher. It says Richard Pryor Rodney Dangerfield and you just mentioned Rodney Dangerfield and we're not even ten minutes into conversation. So that was our time right and there's people today that don't even know who that is. Try. Yeah In insane, so no respect, no respect at all. You remember that. I used imitate Rodney dangerfield wherever I went when I was studying. All. I did everything I could have voice. And his and his movies, what was the movie? I can't remember the college that was. CADDYSHACK was probably famous. Did say movie going back to school back to school? Age Field yet back school when he had said in an e I couldn't remember the guy's name. Yeah, there's people today Mike that have no idea who that is and to me that baffles me. From the classroom when she says. What do you think about the great death? He was great. I remember him on the diving board. DO IT I! Don't know why I remember this, but it was called the triple Lindy and he did this dive, and it was obviously TV generated, and it was like three different trips, and and you know he was on the college, or whatever it was college or high school swim team. And he was, he was the the legend, and it was just an amazing you. You know if you watch it now, you'd probably like Holy Shit. How did I even laugh at this? But it was just old school comedy, which is so famous or so? I guess you'd say inspiring. So people like him I was never big Sam Kinnison Guy I loved for some reason growing up Richard. Pryor and I think I love him because he did curse, every word and I thought it was great. Things was that teams when he did that died, and the actually mentions where we did it, and he said Hey, aren't you that guy that didn't? It was steel pier in Atlantic City exactly what the horse remember those days I'm a little younger. Absolutely? I don't remember either, but plenty of trips Atlantic city in my life for sure. So so somebody like me, Mike Honestly I've always been in the bar and restaurant business I went to school I. Always wanted to be the greatest chef of all time. I'm short statue I'm not a big guy. By any means. I never quite knew what I wanna do with my life. At some point in time I wanted to be a police officer. I remember my mom. Tell me Tim one hundred pounds. That's never going to work you. You live in New Jersey. You'RE GONNA get killed, and then I to culinary school, my mom and dad own talion dally a New Jersey, so I of I'll try that, but my whole life I've always said if I could do it over. I would go back and try to be a comedian or even some kind of radio host, because I love talking to people. and not so much face to face I like talking like we are here, but for somebody like me almost fifty years old. You're a little bit over to me. Is it too late for me? And then I you know, and and how do I get started? How do I get enough guts to get on that stage because I'm sure and we'll get to in a second. How did you do it? Well I. Never, had here, okay. And going on stage, and being upon a people was a drug. So I didn't have I wait. And then when you get older and you become a professional entertainer. What would be a necessary? I can't wait to I've been on page three months. Mike Person Parents. Next Thursday night. At a club in Naples Florida and I just can't wait to get on the state his job and have voted gun of new material. But that'll that would have. Like go on. Careful what? Yeah Oh my God right we're. We're in that movement right now. We all know that regardless of your opinion or not i. get what you're saying, but let's go back to your first time and you whatever you don't have to be too detailed, but when you said Shit, let's go I'm going to do it tonight at seven. o'clock I mean. Do you remember that we're was it? When was it? What did you do? The triumph! All had a big Beach House on the Jersey shore down. and. They had no pike night. And everybody was going there because they're open mic. We're going to have like Karaoke thing up like that. We went in there I. Don't think we knew it was a comedy competition with Amateur League. And since I already backing backed by the night saw what they were doing on, my did the hell out of my way I can do that, so so I went on stage and I. Just made fun of her Shell Exactly, ended. Kim Your genes. So, that's that's so funny. You said that, and you're creating so many memories for me, so I have in my head and tell me if this is crazy. Mike, Crazy Mike. I have a skit in my head. That's probably about nine minutes long I've gone over at fifteen times in the last five years of exactly what I would do, if I got on stage, but my biggest thing is I. Tell my wife or people that are real close to me. I'm not a joke teller. I'm a storyteller. Could Make Fun of the guy with the green shirt in the front row I could make fun of my parents I could make fun of myself, so is that is that unique or or should i? I. Guess you just answer my question, but you did the way I'm talking about so. Is that normal? It's normal. The truth is always funny when comedian gets on stage of life. He will make everybody laugh. When you make something up, people might not get Utah Trout. You're on your point of view how you see what's going on in the world. You'll always be funny. 'cause everybody's vigil. Go Oh my God I know. Yeah my mother. Father Act like that. Might might date ended like that. All the touches all my agent pains. Oh when I see Dr Anything. That's real will take people on A. They'll they'll take the ride with. So when I don. I didn't really make under. The out that. Really make a pot of twelve thousand. And people will wear because. They're enjoying listening to what they see within their family exact vegas. They can relate right. Most people can relate at some side. Bubble showed. For fifty people waiting on the table every day. Was Jerk tasted came over twenty. Six. That's my life every day. Exactly. I got a chuckle out of that from. Your saying this is what she. Had venue d-actually control. And that's what I would say this. I'm and cook. had. Somebody that take a picture. You're never gonNA, get. So then I stretch it and say I. Think my mother was responsible. Buckle and she said I've had enough about doing it. Somebody paint a picture of all these. This is the last of. You're exactly right. My Mom true story would do this. She cooked every night for my dad and asked me and my brother and my sister, and still does to this day every single day for my dad now in my. Fast forward to me my wife now my second wife than married you. She has never cooked a thing in her life and I cook every meal and I do this i. do things such as like my mom did? My mom gets so mad if you are not ready to eat when she tells you, it's ready and her theory is. I have busted my ass and kick whatever I had to do to make this meal. Perfect and hot for you and is sure to hell ain't going to be on your plate, and you're GONNA eat it. It cold, so like I'll be like honey. Two minute warning dinners about coming out and if that if she ain't down there shits I'm thrown in the trash so I've had plenty of those talks. This is the last time on cooking for you, so it's. It's so funny that you bring that up, but do you feel that? Do you carry these stories? Mike and I'm just asking for my own good, because I'm GonNa do this sooner or later. Do you carry these stories to each night that you do performance because they are different people, right? is usually different people visible so repetitive cover. Okay show. Things for certain amount of time. Then you change a little bit the new age track and go back to beginning. You could bring something back maybe that you did a while ago. Something like that. Obstacle humor whatever's going on the world today. What's going on in the area maybe if I went to. Talk about seeing things that I don't normally get to shake her. I did write a joke one time and I was injected, and I said I went to the dairy foam and I never seen that many towns. Show, but they thought this one pounds walk around with blue strange and I'm thinking to some within that, you don't even have got half. And half and people would just scream like really stupid. I. Get what you're saying. Yeah! Shortage won't carry. It was the thinking well. That's where they get the soy milk. Chocolate milk right never. Show Leavenworth I saw the black gang counts and I've I've never seen. And, you only really know that work by gang is because of the restaurant. and. I saw the account I. Think were both that had their horns rumble. Today J- I you people of. The horns off those bowls and they've screaming. Idiot. But I make them land exactly, and that's the. How long is a typical set for a guy like you? I mean is a twenty minutes is ten minutes. Oh, it is so you go that long, okay? Calling who you performing. People Out Hollywood you twenty minutes showcasing such just go onto. Want minutes Gotcha your headliner. Gene hundred people in the theater. You don't h for our dollars fifteen minutes. No, that's true. My wife and eye anytime and I guess that we've been the LA of bunch. We've been the laugh factory and a few other places right there on whatever the main drag is, but we. You're right I mean the main person gets the the time, but have you ever. Let's back up record. Have you ever had enough or I guess? Nerves were like man. I'm going to really screw this up today had. Seven years to become the headliner. Comedian. And fear. Shoe because it should become your job. You WanNa go to work. I really don't know that many comedians that are trained to get on stage order, but. She's doing a theater of about navy downtown people than he did, but he a hunger I can't wait to get steak, yeah! Up Shut up daddy. Let's go I. GotTa go go. No I. Get that and that's I just I just need just need to rip the band aid off and try it even if there's seven people in the in the in the room I I agree with you, but is there anything that sticks out in your head? That like? Wow, I really fucked up or that was a failure that. And I'm sure you have. We all have even in a normal job. Anything, you could share like man. You really screwed that up. But it would have been so long ago. That I really don't even remember. Yeah, not that I'm doing. Stand up comedy twenty seven years. Yeah, that's so long! Datus screwing up or saying something wrong. Not only that much fun need the oil. 'cause everybody a comment. Yeah, who knows what it's GonNa be like now God knows people even going to be really really hungry to see what you can do or and enjoy, or you'd have somebody the back in. The paper right can't. Actually I want you? To. It's it's insane. I can only imagine listen. I've only been doing this podcast thing for short period of time and I've gotten. I would have to say ninety five percent great feedback, but there's always that two or three percent, and you're like Jesus. Christ I can't make you happy. No matter what I do and I've even gone back and made shot setup person trying to make things better, and you still don't so I get it, but how long do you think in your twenty-seven? Stand up career. How many years did you finally think? Man I got this I got it. Seven year. Okay, so that seven year thing so. Then I became a headliner. I do this. I wanted to do I didn't really think of going to become a comedian I just want to be an occurred, but very difficult can act role. Future whole and medium. Control your. Yeah eventually after I was performing I ended up crucial. Depending on cruces like home, other animals that be really really clean. You can't do anything that with anybody Yup. Why it's funny, you say that because I was looking at your tour dates and we'll we'll go. We'll go through all you and your promotions at the end, but I was like Oh. My God he's got, he's got cruise ship coming up. I wonder if that's going to happen, right? Oh they did. Well let's just let's say that you were on a cruise ship. Do you just fly in on the cruise ship? Do your show for day and fly home or do you stay on the cruise ship? Worse different lengths. Depending on who you are. What should go on okay seven days on? Okay that's going to be fine. I saw the whole. Him Go back, yeah! That's gotta be interesting. That's gotta be interested in re really interesting so real. Quick on your material, and you know the biggest thing that again. I'm by no means where you're at in my life, but you know the biggest thing is, you can't steal another comedians material. So how do you stay current and I only say that? Because you said you're fifty five and I'm almost fifty I have a daughter. Twenty five and the ship that she's into is nothing that I can relate to. So. How do you stay current and you know I mean what is your? What is your I guess? You're studying or tools that you use to come up with material. Everybody could never talk. To it! Every day that we go out and walk around giving South America Fun. All you have to do is just talk about. Not Everybody's GonNa. Think what you saw was funny. But? Most people will yeah. He's twenty five you. Say I went to one. And everything is self checkout yeah. I wonder when this happens. Because how do they walk in shock? All of the sudden they flee. But. What. At My job who I call! So this ways to make the money for those kids. Now Mike say you're so busy. You don't know what the heck you doing 'cause commonplace. Then, you just take it to the extreme. And, went into Walmart. To. Did self checkout and I got an argument with my show. I've done that. Are doing it. That's fantastic. That makes money. Just laughed and of all the people go working trying. To change yourself into the airport. Any way your bed. For White Bread way my thanks. My baggage would have the bugging charge myself. I get it. You're exactly right. Thirty five dollars. You're you're. GonNa turn around and go home, right. Now short about these jokes one on one. Might, not be that funny I'm trying to speak to you, but when you perform it for people, then they take the live. Oh for sure, and it only takes one chuckle right. One chuckle creates more. You know you could see a doctor at Walmart. No. You could see a doctor and soft warm one, so it makes you wonder. Wanted to the Walmart says you know what I don't feel good. I must see here at the wool Mata early tonight free by the fruits and vegetables. Don't know, didn't. The I'm cracking up. I love it. Dr. Sexual. How long have you been a doctorate Wolman, said six months I said well. What did you do before you were adopted? said he was a cashier. You're giving me. I do totally. Knocked out twenty five year old, and then everybody else takes on the. Walking because. It's fantastic. How how is and you don't the, don't get too personal. But how is the pay? I mean I. would assume now like you said you're a headliner. Obviously, you can a career, but I would imagine in the beginning. It was tough. Right I mean there's a couple hundred or whatever it is a night, and then you still got to have a real job, and that's got interfere with your material and then timing. You're tired all that stuff. Right when I was younger when I graduated high school. I went to the American Academy dramatic. Arts in new. York City. They told you leap. Pro Cared you get your at. Your Ego Brew. Get ready to go out and get a suit of armor and pretended your skin. People penetrated constantly. And the most important thing you have to have is a survival shop without it. You will never become an actor a viable job. That could be waiting tables. That could be bartending four. Something else in the industry like working at an agency. Working as the distance casting director working as he as always work. Somehow in the industry. Because you do not earn a living in the beginning. Not Close. Yeah and I think I. think that's appealing to me. Because I have such a wonderful job, everything is wonderful. I would never quit my job. And now I'm at the point in my life were like wow, I think I have enough time money and and I. Guess I would say life experiences to try it. Does that make sense? So. Were you always? Were you always like you said in the industry never went the restaurant bar. industry-type suffer no. Waiter to try it on. You worked in supermarket. Worked at a comedy club. I always had a survival job. Yeah, you have to. Do So. I'm, GONNA I'm GonNa make funny here real quick. You seem like an amazing individual. No wife, no kids. What's The story Mike? I guess when I was younger girls that I've wanted to marry didn't want to marry me okay? Twenty. Been In my thirties girls that I want to marry didn't want to marry me. And then I moved to walk. And it. Never happened okay. So, what did you tell anybody that will walkie that way? Your. What's the? What's The answer, right? Now. This unhappiness is not about finding a mate I'm just asking because you sound like a superstar to me. I met a girl that we were together for quite some time she would considerably younger than. And I love her to death. What's all on real quick? What's considerably younger? Tell me what that means you. My Wife's ten years. That's the reason I asked so tens not consider early. Okay, no I I agree with you I. Think Anything I think anything over ten. Maybe over twelve is is a lot different so anyway. She was twenty years younger, so that is a big difference. And I loved her. But she wanted to get married and have children. And I traveled so much. That we weren't. Enough, so that happened and. Then what? Then I have to quit what I've been how I support the young I'm with you. So these are being major pretty normal thing. Most people show. Up in back divorce gotcha. Well. That's funny. 'CAUSE I. Know, I'm with you, I come from the restaurant Bar, industry, and most of those people I. Bet you dated say end up in divorce. I was married the first time at twenty one. Regardless, good or bad. That didn't last, but thirteen years, but now I'm remarried eight years I, believe don't get me in trouble and it's wonderful. It's my second term around so I think when I when when you say show business, and I think restaurant bar business to different totally things, but same nightlife, so so there's a big. There's a big stigma out there and you don't have to get into this if you don't want to do that A. A lot of Comedians people in the industry doing comedy suffer for mental health, ill shoes and I. Don't get that because a lot of comedians such as yourself extremely funny, always the life of the party energetic. That's how I am and I have never in my life, and I'm not making fun of anybody suffered from Zion were depression or any of that because I'm just so positive. Is that a common thing in your industry? Both Canadian detainers. Some sort of depression. And their relief. Of Depression. It's a platform. Because when you perform it. Here's some Kinda. Warriors you four yet. You feel so good, yeah? But it stops. And went to King. He feel good like that, emily you do. That when you're especially one who don't do drugs, yeah, I, don't I don't do drugs have any of a scapegoat like that? Yeah know. now that I'm older not like I. Have the Energy Glove every have a cocktail 'cause. I never really did that anyway. And I have I do have the night so now that we're actually. Stopped the showbiz thing right now before Kobe nineteen. been suffering from a different type of depression. Myself so massive loveliness! Mac Route my agent. My manager bill all. Same Him so long. Loving I can't say in any longer. Who Ain't way to shape. Up. What's the next thing to do? WHO's crying there out because? Not only do we go through pandemic, but now we have this other problem which is. Pretty scary. You know I. I don't know about it too much everybody in this world. It's like that. Kind caring loving people that don't deserve to have. happened. Know I totally get it. And I totally get it. You said it in the beginning of this conversation. Whatever was march nineteenth, or whatever you said I mean. That's your living entertaining and all of a sudden someone told you it's over, and like you said I mean it's you don't even have the option to work from home like most people have done so I can get where you get lethargic sitting home gaining weight I have been lucky and I know. We don't know each other but I. I work for a grocery store Mike so I have never fucking stopped then. It's been madness for fifteen weeks now here in Texas, so I'm lucky so I. Don't have a lot of the pinions that the majority of the world do about this 'cause. Nothing's changed for me now. My wife, she was told to work from home. You weren't even told that you know so I can understand it. Nothing it's done. Yeah, all your interaction, all your highs and lows all that whatever you said, orgasmic energy of of performing is over, and it's been three months. That's gotta be tough. That's amazing. Why a lot feel for your my friend I don't want to be lonely. By any means I know you and I have just connected, but we can. Always you can always text meal to shoot the Shit with you, and you teach me along the way and I can definitely Try To make you laugh. I know you'll make me laugh, but quick before we finish up a few things I have a few questions for you. Yesterday. We were talking via text and you said you were filming something. So are you into? Are you into a new journey right now? What's going on? I have a youtube channel and in videos. By Youtube Channel. Is Mike Moreno by on you too? And we have a very large amount of follow word. Watch what I did so yesterday. The Okay A. One. Six characters and you'll get. An had talked to each other. When you say characters like impressions. I have my uncle Tommy by causes, mony, my cousin, Michelle I impersonate. It's. It's you I got you so your cousin shall I can only imagine. Give me two seconds of your cousin Michelle. A wonderful. How Father Dan point come from really great for my daddy got it inventory Tory secrets secret out of one show. destig- and spent ethic. So you're working on youtube so I have and you're gonNA think I'm a Pansy and I don't know why I just said that, but I have this. Big Fear of going on Youtube so I love doing what I'm doing right now. I have very short period in very short period of time Mike. At least I feel it's been very successful. I've had a ton of information ton of followers all that stuff, but I have this fear of going on. Youtube I feel like Youtube has been around for so long and. And here comes this little white guy on there and I'm going to get eaten alive so as Youtube I subscribe to you by the way you and I text earlier I'm a huge fan I didn't know much about you before we connected, but I subscribe to your channel, but is youtube rewarding? You feel like you're getting the same I guess high from that. Yes, because get common. And you can make money. So the more people that watch. They don't Pack Subscriber K Okay Advertising. Okay. So like? Yeah. Well that and I love that. There's no better name I think. That's fantastic, so just just educate me real quick, so would I be on you if I did it. Would I be on Youtube right now. Live talking to you, or is it like? Right publish it. You. Okay. Well Okay Yeah. I've learned the INSTAGRAM TV. Thing. I'm just figuring that out I I've I've learned a lot about social media. You want to get on much social media. Can any tell everybody who you are what you're doing? And maybe they'll join in I. have sponsored got a couple of. Club sponsor, so you could tell listeners if they want to. You can go to Mike. Marino dot net I've felt each. Nicobar apparently again and. At, Mike Marino. I love it, my friend so real quick before we finish and thank you for giving me the youtube, ins and outs, and I hope you don't mind I'm gonNA either text or email you some youtube questions, my wife, my wife keeps asking me when I'm going to get on there and I'm like I. Don't know how to do it through I'm going to figure it out, but I'll ask you but real. Quick before we finish I. Want you to Promote Yourself I. Know you've been out of work for a little bit. This is your chance. I want you to give it everything you got and that everybody know who you are. Go ahead. You're listening to New Jersey's base with comedian Mike Marino. Just finished up my world tour. Make America tiny again my slogan. You. Don't know not seen on, you know. One of the president of the United States I will take care of everything. You won't know what I'm doing. Would you be happy that I think? Mike Marino dot net subscribe, go youtube fold slash Mike Marino. Alive instagram Mike Marina, alive twitter, Michael Ally and of course. Fantastic I am a fan for life. My friend I can't thank you enough for this last forty four minutes that we spent together I've learned a ton. I, am going to be like I said asking you a ton of questions. Thank you for joining me. Thank you for being on ten items or less podcast. I can't even remember who hooked us up together but I'm going to go back and thank them I really really really and I. Mean this the bottom of my heart, not just podcast bullshit. Appreciate you coming out here and my fan I'm GONNA. Shoot you some questions. And and hopefully one day you'll be in Texas or somewhere, maybe in Florida where my parents live and I'll come see you okay. You got it awesome Mike so much. By. Were there. You go guys. That was Mike. Marino the world famous comedian. The guy has been around forever. He is literally an institution in New Jersey he is. Over the place in the country right now. Performing comedy I really enjoyed that. You guys, I, think you all know at least that that was my hopes and dreams, or still is my hopes, and dreams to be comedian, and he gave me some good insights, and I'm going to try I'M GONNA. Try. We're going to do. We're GonNa do a Mike Night here soon and I'm GonNa. Fill you guys in how it goes, but again thank you so much for listening at ten items or less. Please send all your emails to ten items or less podcast at gmail.com, also visited me on facebook and Instagram, attendance or less podcast. Thank you so much for all the support. You guys are wonderful, and I'll talk to you next episode, thanks.

Mike New Jersey Texas Youtube La Mike Marino Florida Leavenworth Hollywood High School Michelle I Jersey City Austin Texas California Google president Rodney Dangerfield Mike Person Kansas Tim
#696 - Andrew 'Dice' Clay

The Church of What's Happening Now

1:43:05 hr | 1 year ago

#696 - Andrew 'Dice' Clay

"Greetings from podcast Ville. The church of what's happened. Now is brought to you by four hymns dot com. A one stop shop for hair loss skin care, and sexual wellness listened with age comes wisdom. But getting older goes Opie a Downer in one specific area if you know what I'm talking about forty percent of men by the age of forty struggle from not being able to get and maintain direction. Why do guys turn to wit solutions? What do nothing at all is still going to doctors and getting medicine it. Relate to science expensive pills on injections. Nobody wants an injection. But I'll tell you what, while known generic equivalents to name brand prescriptions to help you combat he'd the, that's what forums dot com does at a few questions about your medical history. Chat with a doctor confidential review. If you're approved by the doctor products shipped directly to your door. Nobody knows. Nothing. 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She is a portable the day that clips right on to your toilet bowl. No plumber. No, nothing eclipse, the existing toilet, and sprays your, but completely fucking clean with fresh water that toilet waters member used and somebody else wash their ass. No fresh fuck them war, it's called touchy. And it's the best thing you can do for you. Little stinky, fucking muffler, right? Toshi sprays directly into your s and removes the shit. So yon sitting on 'Bacterial that leads to nasty things like amyloid yeast, infections, UTI itchy assholes skid marks and God knows what the fuck house. You understand me when he think a chick sucks your pipe. She doesn't smell that fucking Loor gap for an asshole, you gotta watch that ass. It's the summertime and you living in humidity. Uncle Joe is here to help you go to hell does. She dot com slash church. Listen to me Hello to she dot com slash. Church that easy. Get ten percents off your order, right? Go to Hello does. She dot com slash church. Lease I at check this mother fucking meal. The Churchill what's happening now. Epi comedies. Decides play. Joey, he's got the price. Show. What's this? I love that. That's the jamming I love pick him with that. It really is. That's a jam in a decade. Go when you asked me, century, eagle on to come out with said it was like instant. I didn't have the there was no thought done a lot of fun and breaks. That's it. Yeah. I do love it. I love it. Great to have you on the show, you spend and beautiful. Thank you. Congratulations. On a star is born now, here's the fucking crazy thing. A lot of people, I know this because we had Nick Malonga sitting at oh, okay. You also want do the guest book. So anyway, the green book green guys book, the green book anyway, you, call it, you will either being one Academy Award nominated film or fucking tooth. Well, you know what? Honestly, I was really happy for neck because you know, just like us guys struggled and struggled, and I know all about the movie and with the movie was about about his dad, and like he couldn't even believe like when it was going to get made. You know what I mean? When there was a deal flowing into place. And then all of a sudden Spielberg signed on the what's it called Amblin company, you know, and Knicks come to me going, you know, Spielberg's now producing this. Like I was just thrilled for him because this a guy just like us, you know, did whatever you had to do to pay his rent, you know, you know, now, he's, he's the winner, not just the best picture best screenplay and he's just cooking. Now. He was talking about you, because you both the sopranos per, yes. Yes. How was that great? He was great. He's like the greatest guy, right? Sweetheart of you know, just a sweetheart. I'm I shot a film with him in two thousand twelve. Oh, okay. So, you know, we met, and he was explaining the story about his father Bubba block until this day. I've always said, any mob move over the same his father's got the best lime any moment. Opening the pope village Mickey rook walks into the restaurant and the maitre d' says the way to goes the guy wants to talk to in the back lets the movie opens still rolling. He goes into the bathroom, and this guy shaking his Dick Rippe superior off the thing. And he goes, oh, how come nobody keeps me? Wait, when they're looking to Blau. Luck and just just threw me off. That's like our movie. Yeah. Somebody wants to borrow money that ten minutes before like pulp is like a bible to us by. I lost my fucking mind. But it's now talking to you about the film saver cook mckie's first line to favor them cook jolly, I'm coming. I'm coming job when he says to him, after they come off and he's in the room with the punch him away. Wait a minute. And I haven't done this in a long time. And he's stoned out from taking all the pills cause Mickey's gone. How many knows I don't know. I took all fucking and then he's like, hitting the, the there's a heavy bag. And Mickey's Thome how his girlfriend dumped him, you know. And Eric Roberts characters what's his name again in the movie. Every it's Charlie drought Hawley all Asia. Sometimes. Yeah. Got us MAC. You gotta say you put your coat on, and you don't say goodnight tug, no body. And that's just a humble. And then he passes out, you know, I mean, you don't smack the knock a mind. He's what did you say? He goes, sometimes you got us back now. It's Magar and say, you it's not about knocking them out, just your clothing. Good night. You code on a new don't second night Todd nobody. And that's just a humble. You don't hit him during the oak tree, but didn't give them a little wacky says something like I don't have the exact squatting front of me. I'm sorry. Thirty five years ago came. Wow. So nobody's got the right frontal. Five snuck in years show me, the clip of that. I have seen pretty close have been waiting for the sequel to that there's a sequel they had, and it's so funny because the guy that was like a PA on that movie was to produce on by the men to what you know, and I want up to shook his hand. He's got did you even see that, you know, the original cast was supposed to be pope? No, we're supposed to be Pacino James Caan. That's it was going to do that move and what happened. They fell out and mckeon and Eric Robinson it. And that's the only way can ever see that movie. Like, even when I think, of how great Pacino James Caan should it would have done. But you just see the scene like we're doing the scenes from the movie there's so many great minds in that movie when they're at the fucking or stable. The milk in the whole whatever the fuck that doing the foot. He goes, it's like your mother's Matz around. Nothing nothing. But I went to your mother stall. Motorola, and the guy gets it's not the trolls have never made a piece of two that time, nothing but Matz kinda tough was kind of tough. I used to do all that on stage impressions. He cut his thumb off with a knife. Frankie vincent. I love to work with Frank Vincent. Four sit during a what a fun happened. All these years, I was a good fucking if movies, but he franked a ton of movies. Frank was amazing amazing, you know, his he was supposed to be Scorsese was looking at him for when they were doing the raging bull. Okay. And so they were looking at a film, like a B movie with Frank Vincent. And in the background was peci. You know, like doing something onstage, 'cause in Frank will partners like a comedy team. And, and as he was like, who's that guy, and they both obviously wound up in the movie, but it made test career because he wasn't even being thought of at the time from what I know from the stories, I've been told so they both wound up come these big time actors he put him in everything, Frankie, Vincent. Except I think mean streets is Frankie Vincent. No, no. This is all. This is all post potent means streets. You know, this was once it became like raging bolt on. Now. What was it was a good fill? Whichever one came first raging came a okay. Eighty one eight. Okay. And then good fell. He was like a restaurant waiter or something, Joe. She manager at a restaurant and him. And Frankie was the drummer. Yeah. Thank you. Vincent was a drummer or something. And they wouldn't like some we had like a little drum battle, you crack a joke in the symbol sh that they were team working. Yeah. But we did we did this movie that never came out, man. Frank. Vincent did Lynn stop. A Mexico was called the good life. Was this crazy thing that we went through in Mexico, two months? But there was a set of drums, so we were going back and forth. He was a good drama. He was like a real, j it's drama, great guy, just a great guy like he's the way you would have wanted to be, when you meet them, you know, even play the, you know, when I'm not on screen disquiet. This whole like some of these actors, you know, he had personality patchy the greatest. You know all these guys when I first met, you, you would just getting off the set of a movie with Stallone, his brother. That's the movie, the good life, and you playing golf or something like that, yet you toward the movie never came out, tortured, brother had because it wasn't being teen. Play to torture, Frank. If, if I get into that story, we will not get to talk about anything else, and I love, you know, Frank. Give me one torture chamber. You put okay my world. Frank aided rallies. Okay. No. But frying happens to be like a great great sing like he's got that Sinatra style a singing like he can do that with the big band. Okay. And but I didn't know too much of it back then. Right. So anyway, Frank would go off and piss all of Harry Connick, who was the biggest at the time with the big band stuff. Okay. And so me and Frank would argue over this, and I'm saying how great conic is, and Frank would piss all over it. And one day in the makeup trail at this, this act appeared Dopson was also doing the movie with us. So unloved entertaining Dopson by fighting with Frank day night, you know. You know, and the reason the fighting what happened would be because he wasn't being a team play with us. Like Frank would be like, do you understand this movie's, my fucking shot, you know, and I'm the lead in this, and then he'd leave my room and I'd look at Peter Dobson ago, turn this movie into fuck and Jerry Lewis? And the movie, the movie was supposed to be funneled. The kind of movie is supposed to be goodfellas on a golf course. Okay. Okay. It's a very tough moving, you know. And I'm behind Frank impersonation of him smoking. He doesn't even see me doing this ship. A mocking on screen because of the way he treated us. Okay. So now he's with the conic bullshit. So one day I come into to make up, this is an it's one hundred and ten degrees and stop a Mexico ever been to stop. No nobody understands nothing. I didn't eat food for five weeks. Everybody was winding up in the fuck and hospital. Don barris broke his like I in a hole in the floor or something. So every day I would eat at five o'clock, I would have pasta and garlic, bread and coke with purified ice, and I wouldn't eat till the next day at the same time. That's all I would eat. Because everybody was falling at the waist and going to the hospital, but it was a beautiful island in Mexico. Okay. So I come into to, to make up and Franks. And he's blasting that it's distorted his his cassette. Okay. Of his music that allowed he was playing. And I don't say a fucking word. Because, you know, when I have a thing about me, and I really made it like a big thing when I did entourage about nobody fucks with dice dice, does the fucking in the long run for always and forever dice does the fucking. That's just the way it is. I don't if it's an executive show run over an act Weber wants to fuck with me learns that in the end I will do the fucking. That's it. It's how I've lived my life. So I'm letting the music just blast and pitas there and he's not saying nothing and I'm doing my makeup and. So now I'm done with the makeup, you know, Frank still sitting there and pita, still sitting there and as passing the, the, the distorted cassette play on lower the volume. Okay. And go, you know, something Frank, you know, I'm going to say, and I'll say in front of this trailer full of people. You do sing better than Harry Connick junior, I go the differences, Harry Connick junior, sings the songs people wanna hear. And that's why he did nine nights at Madison Square Garden, and I crank the music and welcome. He's trying to yell at me. I just walked the fuck out, you know, it's like, come on, but Frank really does all honesty. He's like an unbelievable crooner all kidding aside with sixteen saw Castro, this guy swings like Sinatra, you know, and I even have him on, like all, my platelets, like you know how you make playlists on your ipod all that. And I would call this fucking moron and I go once we became friends, again, it only took like three years after the movie, and I go Frank, why not in Las Vegas. With the orchestra just swing. Five nights a week. Well dice, if you got me an agent white, a fuck do I need to get you. An agent. Stallone your Sligh's brother. He can't get you a personal appearance agent. You wanna best I go, and I love, like, Michael, boo. Blair, I love all these guys, but he sings betta Frank is better. He's just a better singer. The feel something when you perform you don't you know, and he's one of those guys when it gets onstage, he just feels it, you know. And then he'll pick up the acoustic guitar go. No, not the acoustic. A fuck about you with an acoustic guitar. Swang mother fucker just fucking swing. He's amazing. He really is amazing. He put maybe twelve years ago, I used to work at this gym, and they through the cassette out the fucking DVD. Everybody walked put rap music now. He's, he's actually a great guy. He reads like a book day, like, you know, but, you know, and that, you know, that movie never came out that was a lot of problems. And Dennis hopper was in the movie. You know, sly was in the movie, they did it. He did a cameo, you know, and. You know. It just became a mess. And you know. You know, I had like so nothing now would happen get a call. There's a long time ago. So I guess I like thirty. So I you know. I get a call. I'm sitting at the pool with my wife at the time I got whisper this and. So now I get a call from slides attorney that does a problem that might be a big lawsuit with the movie. So I'm trying to tell the attorney like, well, you know, if there's a problem, you know, call me whatever like blowing it off. Because, you know, that was like a little indiscretion with me and like one, the produces like a little like little onset affair wasn't accident. And, you know, so I couldn't be sitting on the phone next to the woman. I love going again. Talk about it now because, you know, there was thing with the. But if you need me, I'm with, you know, was crazy. What would go on? I you know, I'm fucking good. I just can't help myself. I love. The marriage didn't work. I don't believe on cheating on your wife. But if you bump into a blow job, so I told you walk on this. I don't look at flying blow look at it like cheating. It just comes down and such dick and flies. How does this sound Joey? It's not cheating, if you're in another state and you can't get there in time. You know, like I've called different wives and girlfriends, and go. I will wait till midnight to blow my cork. But you gotta be there and be ready to catch it or else. I got no choice. You leave me. No choice. You know, a nice like that. I don't wanna cheat on them. You know what I mean? They, they do it to them selves. You know how will you gonna get from across the country? I got a load that's boiling, and my bulls, you know what I mean? I, I got a complete face. Full of paste feel. You know what I mean? So where are you there? Are you with ikat call them, you know, and your mouth, wait a fuck? You know what I mean? You know, I'm a guy I really do enjoy sex. I you know, it's the reason I date. You know, I, I don't mind blowing my own load, but I'd rather have somebody that if I'm bored with myself. All right. Come over here. Don't be shy. You know what I mean? Moved to pillows out from between us. I do hate sharing a bedroom with a girl. Oh, yeah. You know. And trust me, I'm not doing any stage material here showcasing foot, whoever's listening. This is just who I am. But like, you know, like, let's say you have an argument, like with the chick, okay? What do you do you turn your back to a right? Always, you know, like like that's going to stop, you know, all of a sudden, she opens up the laptop with the glow like a like a UFO just landed in the fucking bedroom. So you're not going to be able to sleep. But if you have your own bedroom, and not everybody could afford it. You know, but if you have enough bedroom have your own fucking bedroom. So when you do have an argument, it just go over there, you know instead of being in the same room in hearing, the, the heavy. Are you gonna be like walk out of the room? Just work out of the room. I don't get away. You sleep, you know what I mean? So it's very hard to share a bedroom. That's what I believe in. I don't even know what talking about this stuff goes to fuck because I was no fucking good. I told my sons all the time I go, you know, I'm you know smoker, you know, which I quit now you know, a gambler, you know, I you know, I would I cheat on all my girls, you know, because, you know, because they just don't allow you to bang the checks without any repercussion. I just never understood that. You know, the home moment thing always threw me off going. So why could some jerk off guy living in fucking Utah? Be able to fuck ten chicks. Take a pick this one for tonight this, you know. And I'm the nicest guy in the world, and I get one and then all of a sudden 'cause a matter guy that bang. From that time at a month, I could live without at that time in a month, but give me like a little room. Right. You know, let me go have a few laughs. I didn't create this cycle that you go through. And now today, you know how they will want you to really understand what they would a fuck as what you go through. I'm not a girl a never gonna understand this shit. Just tell me when I could hop the fuck back on that. I wanna know. Yeah. You know, like if I start dating girl like asko like I know, when that kind time in Amman, like, like, do you really get like in a bad mood like one to ten like, you know, like, give me the answers to the test that I need to know? If I can make this, a serious relationship like between one and ten how bad is it? Do you go seven days? Is it a three day like quickey because I'm not waiting seven fuck in days and watching you angry for said. Days does no way living with you. If that's the fucking thing, you know, just live on your own and come see me when you when, when. When you're reveal lable do whatever I need done done with marriage now. Are you writing it off? I mean I you shouldn't ever say done, you know what I mean. Like, I'm not looking for it because, you know, I would like to now you know, it's like two years since me and my ex broke up. So it's time like, you know, I like having somebody, but number one, she's got to be hot as balls. You know what I mean? That's you know, I'm not going to settle for anything less. You know. I mean why go with something that looks like fucking livestock? You know what I mean? I'm in fucking show business dice. So, you know, I want to be picky about who the next one is. And but marriage I don't know. Maybe you know, I would marry like maybe I don't know like a. The something different somebody number one wealthy to make you know what I mean by a twenty two year old Chinese. It's not even about the aid just have a lot more money than me. Like, if I met like an armless billionaire beautiful, there's something I haven't been with you know what I mean. Like she won't have to turn her call like with teeth. You know what I mean? Like you know what I mean, to make illegal u-turns that would be different, but relies if I meant like. Like all the girls I've ever married, you know, and they've been ton of them and engagements and all kinds of shit. And but I would actually I gotta thing like I actually need to really be crazy about the girl I married because, you know, like when you meet these women that are looking for a guy like with a lot of money, and they spend their life like looking to collect diamonds and 'cause it's like you wasting your time on earth being with somebody, you're not even really into. Yeah. You know what I mean? We're most of the women from LA or if it's women from anywhere, like, you know, a lot of mothers, do teach ticker. Oh, it just disease, a marry riches it. How about marrying just what you love? You know what I mean because any girl ever married I was in love with. That's it till I hated them. Till it fell apart. You know, 'cause I it's Joe even knows my relationships have been like I was with my son's mom for sixteen years. That's a, that's a long run, even my last relationship was nine years that, that's a long run. You know. So, yeah, I never went, you know with a girl for money, you know, like, yeah, when I came out, he was Dayton Sandie Shaw for a little while Mitzi was like, oh, you'll marry my daughter twenty one fucking years old. You know, and, you know forget about Jewish girls, you know. Yeah. 'cause my first girl girl was Jewish girl, and she just wrecked it for all the other Jewish girls. Just awful to be with we get an argument, if I was looking girl in another caller. Okay. Sixty nine the Mons and with drive down king's highway in Brooklyn. She opened the door to throw a self out in the fucking car. I'd have to grit, what the fuck is. This was. Not a one time event. Okay. This went on at least once a week where she strolling herself editor, call a moving call in. So one night, I ask ton Amari may, you know, I wanted to guarantee getting blown, it was New Year's Eve. Right. And so she goes, let's go tell my parents, whatever. So I go to in the morning we don't have. Let's do this instead. 'cause now you're going to be married. And now let's go so we go wait. The parents up and was sitting there, and I actually re sorta did this, my first special dice, man cometh, right? Where this girl calls me, she goes, what's he ever going to be? He's like nothing. That's other girl would act because her father. I don't want to name names or anything. But how fall the at that time was a top NBA ref in the country and back then referees was famous as the place you know. And I don't even follow sports, but he was like if you heard his name, it was like what, you know, you know, and the guy made like fifty grand a year, and, you know all the perks whatever. So we wait the parents, we're gonna get married and she starts with me. It's three in the morning. About the ring. Now I'm working in clothing stone, bringing home like two hundred week and you know, I wasn't thinking this far I, I wanted to blow job, you know what I mean? I'm not thinking about spending thirty grand on ring in and she goes what do you mean? You're not going to get. I can't afford an expensive ring. Right. And she starts a fight in front of parents and all of a sudden, you know, I'm an explosive personality. Some just like fuck you fuck haw yelling at the parents, I go you keep this no good. Fucking bitch Mattis relationship, and I go to leave the apartment, which had a bunch of steps leading to the front door that she's now wrapped to roms around my neck and letting defeat drag on the steps, and I'm swimming at a father, get this fucking animal off of me before she gets fucking hurt in the father's fuck, and pulling her off me. And I'm like three in the morning. This is three in the fuck and morning. Happy new year. Andrew happy fucking new year. You know, and, you know, so I went with that girl, I swore off, like Jewish girls. And on my way to LA I it was saying the ago when my sister lives, that's where I'm at sandy, who was she was a great chick. You know and. I guess she liked my attitude because, you know, I knew I was in comedy for six months. I don't know about spots. I don't know about headlining pips at the my addition on Wednesday night, I was headlining Friday, sadly, you know, because I had an aquit turned from Jerry Lewis into John Travolta from Greece. So it would just kill. So when I come into comedy store, because my sister goes, oh, there's a comedy store in, in, in the Hoya, you know. And go get what the one in L as well. She goes. No, I think that connected, like, you know, so I go over there in a member. John the bartender. Okay. So it's daytime so come over to the sky, and I go yet, like to widow, sign up, I wanna go on tonight, you know, it just came from a Tahoe in Vegas performing, their you know, it was a sandy Hackett thing in, you know, I made like it was a gig, but it was just a showcase. And he goes, oh, you can't just sign up. You know, you got a you got to talk to the manager and. Where is it? He goes. No, it's it's a shame. She's in her office. Knock on the door. You know, be be nice with, you know. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Like, I'm not even thinking Mitzi comedy style. You know, means nothing to me, you know. So sandy, and yet, can I? Yeah. Widow sign up tonight. You know she goes what do you mean with you, sign up? You know, it doesn't it doesn't work. I go, Honey. You know, just Advair goose just the Tahoe. You know, I wanna go on, like, what am I gonna do, and she liked me immediately? You know 'cause like I was might as well been from another planet because I was from Brooklyn, and I never went I never left Brooklyn till I came out here, and she goes, well, why don't you come back tonight, about nine o'clock, and I'll get you on. And I went on and dazzled and next thing you know, we're in her, that she had disgraced Riviera next thing you know, walk in the beach, and, you know with the, the condos and. You know, and they're not come to LA and showcase from its, yet, the twenty eight minutes, which EMC, you know, rob Aguire de remember known. He was an MC back then. But I don't know. Who's the boss who's the own just went on? And they did my whole act. I give a fuck with the three minutes and the sky starts screaming at me as leaving the stage and I go you the owner. And he goes, no, but I'll make sure you get out of my way. You let's the own tells I, I didn't come three thousand miles to do three minutes. Okay. So move out of my way, I'm wanting, you, you know, and then I'm in the bathroom like taking putting all my Jerry Lewis stuff, back in the bag as a guy next to me, my first experience here and do in, you know in the regular bathroom in, in the original room. Yeah, good. You know, you know, me and you we sort of wear head the same way you know, because I had a lot more habit. I go. Yeah. You know, great. You know can help you something because I don't do that. You know, he was like coming onto me, and who was at fucking with me, Gary Shanley. So I'm Gary Shanley, and he started laughing. I am Gary. Yeah. Okay. Good. Bye. And. And then the next day, I get a cool. I'm staying with my friend. L hambro. Where just bang this other chick on the couch that he set up for me to his wife and I get a call. You gonna come to the comedy store and sign papers, europaid regular, you know. And I didn't even know what data will meant. I just was Mitchell Walt as that kept calling my father in Brooklyn. He, he saw me pips and Brooklyn. He was one emits main guys, you know, Mitchell. Yes. So when he saw the actor was doing. He kept calling my father at his office going. You don't understand. I have prepped Mitzi. Your son needs to come out here, and that's the reason I even came to LA was Mitchell, you know, and you know because he did a whole number but he kept goal of my father until I finally said, you know what I'm gonna go out for two weeks. And I didn't go back to Brooklyn for nine months for the first visit because Mitzi was like you, you can't go back there. You know, your star what use it was seventy. Nine February seventy nine when I came out here, jeez. Yeah. Started September thirteen seventy eight at pips and Brooklyn. So, like, you know, hefty later, I'm in LA. So I don't know. There's a comedy boom starting to happen. I just figured, you know, go to LA and just become like one of the biggest stars in the world. What do I have shit? I got I have no academic skills. So this is what I am. It's just just project myself to the shit. So from seventy nine to eighty seven what was going on? I just well, the Travolta act till I did Don Kirshner rock concert, which I did the Jerry lowest Travolta, and I ended with Stallone, it was amazing how we got away with using all that music, you know, paying nickel for you know, the rocky theme in Greece and all the music used 'cause the producer. Was Tom Lynch who was twenty three years old. And I go don't we have to pay like to use don't just three rack. And he wound up producing my first special dice, men comment and. Yeah. Because I took off in it was September thirteenth, exactly. Ten years later. February thirteenth, eight is when I add on the Rodney special on a Saturday and Monday was the biggest comic in the world. You know that what came first Rodney special or the vice may know Rodney special and even really even needed my own special because before my special hit, I was an arena surrounding. It was ridiculous. No shit. And, and what I did I predicted, and I've put this up on my Instagram where I put the Ed on my Instagram of a took a full page ad in variety. You know, on Thursday, the special was going to add the Saturday the thirteenth Rodney thing. So on the eleventh, but, you know, Friday how everybody closes down show business. So I took a full pay just met about thirty five hundred bucks on full-page half. The page is my picture. Real attitude. Picture, not even in a lead them just sitting on a chair backwards. And the other side, I wrote this whole long poem about I like in bold letters, I never studied much in school. But when I turned on the tube, and then I listed everybody like they was Elvis, the king, buddy rich with hands like lightning. Travolta sang in Dan's sly. Knock me out Brando, made me pal. I mentioned all these heroes a mine. And at the end I write Murphy and prior both. Great, no doubt. But in eighty eight it's dice. They'll shout. I never studied much in school dot dot dot, but I did study with big ball, writing Rodney Dangerfield nothing goes, right Saturday, and I predicted, what it was going to be to the entire industry, and it's exactly how it came down, 'cause number one Rodney, lemme at it, my shot 'cause he showed me an edit of my, you know what I did. And I looked at him. And I'm like. He goes, okay, man. What don't you work on? All right. We're going with the director and I worked on it for a couple hours and show to Rodney. He goes, you happy not man. Okay. All right. And that's what he led air because I knew what was going to affect the public. It just, you know, an kit with any of the comics, we're going to do on that show. I couldn't get what's his name, Barry sellable shows up. And what's Barry sellable known for wear leather jacket know something that they spoil Jack baseball? Okay, so he shows up in a motorcycle jacket that trying to fuck in throw me off, you know, all these fucking guys, so I go over to Rodney and I go what's was Sobel and goes what do you mean man? 'cause Rodney looked at me. Like I'm going to be the guy, you know, that's it. Like he knew that I was going to blow up if I did the right set. And I got wasn't a motorcycle, Jack. That's not what he was berry come in, and then, you know, embarrass era, he goes to the jacket. You know, goes, where's the baseball jacket goes away. This goes you wear it, but it's not going to be on TV. Okay, man. So go get your baseball jacket dice with leather Jack and that was it. You know, and I came up there. We did two shows on two different nights. The first show when I left the stage I came over to my father and my mother and training, you know, and I said, done biggest comic in the world. I didn't give a shit about the cameras I played to America. That's how you gotta do it. You know all the other comics word about what everybody else is doing all I can't about. I was so fucking prepared. I would see guys fucking around at the comedy store, you know too late night crabs. Three people fucking around, you know, Schimmel IRA just fucking around on, like you dumb fucks, man, when you get the shot of a lifetime in front of you. I don't get this. Nobody in the room. I'm running the set. You know. And that's it because the one thing I know is, when you do show like that you're going to be a little nervous. So at least be prepared at least know what's coming out of your mouth. No. You're not gonna fuck it up. You know, and Rodney to this day, you know him would never happen. Know the greatest, and let me do exactly what I want to do an edit it exactly the way, I wanted to edit it and the rest became. History. I'll far. So you didn't shoot. Nice man coming for about a year and a half hour that it had nine months later, you know, on New Year's Eve eighty sorta Rodney thing. It's February thirteenth eighty eight. So we'll go into eighty nine so the dice man cometh Ed new jozy eve, eighty nine going into ninety at midnight. You should wasn't before that. Yeah. 'cause it's nine months after the Rodney special because I got walked up eighty eight yet. But that's when I, hey, I got locked up. I think that the roommate showed me the fucking, the special or sorta, Rodney thing because that had a New Year's Eve, and I got out of February eighty nine okay after the Rodney after my special dice, man comet, okay, which had New Year's Eve going into into the next year. New Year's Eve eighty nine ninety I rented out the conference room at the halfway house, and I put your special no you adul- me this got food, and people couldn't believe it. They were blown away them telling you guys get ready for this shit was, how on IMDB as January first nineteen eighty nine. So which means bid. Right, right. Eighty eight going to eighty nine eighty nine going tonight here. Right. I saw eighty nine going into ninety. Okay. Yeah that's, that's when it was. That's crazy because February we're gonna sit here like three dummies trying to figure out a date. So the Rodney thing at February thirteen eighty eight right? Yeah. So it makes sense eight going into eighty nine right? Yeah. Nine months later. So you knew like were you having bad set to that point, like if you had not done. Well, do you think you would have known or, or, or, or do you was that set something so special let you like, okay? I know that's gonna kick ass. The, the set on on run. You know I was prepared. You know, I remember you know, I was so prepared from everything from the material to what I was wearing. The built book was this fucking big. You know it was ridiculous. And I walked from the regency hotel to Rodney Dangerfield club like I told trainee ago, I gotta feel the street, you know, and as a mock, and you can imagine people looking at the sky that look like a superhero walking the streets with the belt buckle. The leather the glasses. It was a whole thing. And I come into the club and Rodney standing there and he goes, how do you feel man, you ready? And I'm winning these stock glasses and I go tonight that pay. Tonight. They get disciplined and he just starts laughing. His ass. Okay. Tonight they're going to pay. All right, man. You got some issues. You know, the way he would you know, he just loved had dead serious. I was like I couldn't give a fuck who was doing that show. You know, one of the first things Joey showed me eight years ago, working together, it's, it's the world of comedy. See this, you know back then, like nobody behind me at all. You know, when I went through the controversy with the news and all that, and journalists, and they would just come down on every comic, and his mother was on fucking television shows that weren't even real shows like they were creating morning shows just to talk about this comic that shouldn't even be allowed to perform. Okay. So I had fucking nobody behind me which leads me to the Roseanne thing, you know, and I was like, so I was never wanted the pack. You know what I mean? When George Slota. Did the the comedy awards for instance, you know? The first year. They're doing the comedy awards. I think that was nineteen ninety and you know who Tim Jones was he passed away Reese, the Blackett. Yeah. No, he did a little while ago. Yeah. Great guy, you know. And we always liked each other, but we never had much to say to each other, we drive to LA Hoya together and Tim would always look at me and goes, which is to talkable motherfuckers, you know, we wouldn't say where, but we just like each other. What did he die from? If you don't know, I don't know what is we'd. Right guy. We haven't seen him since the ten years. We both have a pretty bad drug problem. Now, just a nice guy, man. Nice guy. And this guy comes over to me, so it's the night of the year two thousand. Okay. And that doing the comedy awards, which I wasn't invited to. I was never invited to anything and. I didn't know that having the party for the comedy awards at the comedy store like half the party. Some seeing all these limits up because I said, the training I just wanna get out, you know, go to comedy stuck because bothered me. You know. And it comes Tim Jones over to me at the comedy store and goes why weren't you with the comedy woods? And go wasn't invited and it goes. It's unreal. He goes, how don't they give an award to a guy that has sold more tickets than any comic ever from the day? The first joke was told and they didn't give you an award for that because I was doing eighty thousand people week it was ridiculous. And I had to leave the store when I said at George slaughter because that's what I wanted to do. I want to fucking Slota him, you know, and I came home that night, this is this is kind of fun. Honey? What's not funny. It's actually meeting with these people are night. They wanna do the dice bio pic, you know, and there's a lot of drama in of the Asli these guys that did straight out of Compton, you know, so. So I'm looking around on sitting around this room that in in the house, I had a house in Beverly Hills. So we call the daddies, Dan, where could smoke my cigarettes, make my phone calls to all our tonight. And it's just bugging, the fuck Adamy, you know, all of it, no matter how big I was as a comic. It's just bother me and I go inside and I sit on the bed, and I guess, treaty felt me sit on the bed, and she goes a UA. Right. I was I was you said and just sitting in I go on going back to God. Ago these boys aren't going to grow up without seeing that, and that's it. And she goes, right? When you just, you know, lay down whatever happened, you'll tell me tomorrow, and what ended up happening to go back to God. And this is in two thousand I needed something because I had no heat I was living off my past fame, but as far as like I was done. I was blackballed from the movie industry, the only kind of movies I could do a B movies, you know, and. You know which may be one of them. We'll talk about brain smash with Terry Hatcher that was a special movie and. So I get I get a record deal just to have something to promote, you know, and, and I got the deal, like in two weeks through this producer. And so we put the, the it out, and at that time, I was doing Opie and Anthony, when they were on FM like on the same station stern, but in the afternoon and since I wasn't talking to start at the time I would just do this show. Okay. So my agent calls me up and he goes, right the, the record and he is off the shelves. You know what's the move like, we would always strategize. I go book the garden and it goes, you wanna put the garden, he goes last time you went Westbury did have a house, meaning fifteen hundred people now telling him to book, you know, eighteen thousand but what's going on eat thought, I'm losing it. He goes, don't we do the beacon, and if the beacon sells out, which he didn't think it was, you know, that it would take months to sell it out. He goes, we can move the show to garden. So Dennis, I go the beacons can sell out in twenty minutes. I go you don't understand doing this radio show, because you don't he goes, what why the garden like what's on put ago because my, my sons who had six ten at the time need to see that because it will do something for them. You know, in the long run is how I thought about it. Like something will go in that, you know, like we all looked at our own fathers in whatever way. And it goes, so you want me to call Ron Dell's then book Madison Square, God. And because you need a photo op with your sons. Echo, call whatever you want go, but it will sell out. There's no prop because you're on after noon. Drive. I don't get it. You know. So we booked the beacon like he says, and everybody's taking bets on Opie and Anthony how long it'll take saying twenty minute, it sold them thirty five minutes, beacon theater, which at that time was thirty three hundred seats. So now I call my agent, and he don't know what to say. Because she can't move the show. The beacon owns the. So he calls, Ron delta. And so now, the, the beacons going to be a Tober twentieth two thousand. So he calls up run Rundle's. No. And Dell's, who's legendary promote of which we all know says, look, obviously dice know something we don't he feel something. We, let's put ten thousand seats on sale at the gone, because I sold the beacon, but the only available date was the following Saturday, which is the twenty six now of October. I on sale, we do over seven thousand tickets, which is ridiculous. You know, but then it gets announced that the Mets are going to play the Yankees, and I'm not even into sports, but I know how big a subway series is going to be. The bottom line is I get a cold day of the garden, which trainees them my sons. They're you know they're gonna see this now. You know, it's a Dell's it's run. Dell's. No. And it goes, would you mind if we open up the back, he goes, clean the sellout, you know, so we did the last night of the World Series, the Mets play in the Yankees, we did over fourteen thousand people at the garden and my boys got to sit and now they're Aachen enrollment. Okay. So where I was going with this whole thing was about how even back then just nobody ever stood dealing on that have stood up from a was Eddie Murphy. He did come one time. It came out on senio and talked about how he doesn't give a shit, what anybody thinks he's coming to see me at the amphitheater. And but other than that. All the Jay leno's these fucking jerk off sled them in. Nobody back me up. You know their bad mouth me. I remember coming over to Leno when he said something nasty about me, and I just came out in an interview in penthouse, which I was the first guy ever put on the cover of penthouse, you know, other than Bob Guccione himself, I was the first male on the cover penthouse and it did great. And, you know, came over to, to Leno at that time, and he goes, whoever thought we both get to, you know, we got to go let me tell you something. I knew exactly where I was going. Maybe you didn't go, but I'm telling you, I ever hear you say anything, nasty about me again, I go, you're a guy stood in front of that comedy store with ten years and bullshitted about vintage cars and my old Cadillac. Men, the minute, I made it you wanted open befuddling mouth, I go if I come looking for you again, it's not gonna be any talk involved. Believe me, just keep your. Fucking mouth shut. And I never respected Leno because and it wasn't even me it was his whole reign on the tonight show. He never helped the comedians. You know, he didn't do Johnny Carson did he didn't look to make comics look great and sit down and get them deals. And, you know, when Johnny brought you out if he'd liked you the next day, you gotta deal with the network. You know, he would say, how great you are these guys wanted to sit above look down on you now now let him in on fucking net flicks looking like one hundred and forty five in what the fuck is that looks like he's got, hey, all over his fucking face. Just go to your house and stay in your fucking house. Nobody wants to look at you like that fucking jerk off asshole guy. That's what I think it was kinda guys seriously like picked, you, if you're Johnny Carson, if he walked over to me, I would shake in my boots, and I go so nice. To have met you like whether I was on his show and not it's, it's Johnny Carson who love comedy when Don Rickles was on when Rodney was on when any comic came on costs and he looked at it. This is a moment. I'm on every fucking night for what an hour and a f-, you know, let them shine. Not these this holes. You know, you know, get them on get them off. You know, not how great they are. Honestly, Jay Leno walked out and get the fuck outta him having coffee or, you know, respect. That's what I'd give them because they don't earn it. You know you gotta earn that kinda shit. So now here we will use later. Okay. In Roseanne has little problem, you know, when she was on the fucking Ambien, whatever the fuck it was, which I personally have been on Ambien and been on it, and sixteen seventeen years does make you say shit. It does turn you into characters. It does make you eat every fucking thing in the refrigerator, maybe including shelf until you know what Ambi done. I had a neighbor move out. When I lived in Franklin tower was in it, I, I started going with, with tic TAC tits. You know, Eleanor whatever. And I would love because nobody loves Eleanor more than me. I love so much. I ag- note the tits. Treated those tits like you know how girls get giant tits put on today? That's how I treated those fucking tic TAC tits. Like like, you know she wore a bra like everybody else. But you could take showed off. Maybe one is hanging out like it's almost like if the Bronx could talk it would be saying something like what job? Exactly. You know what I mean? But when I would put those in my mouth, I would open my mouth like I'm putting a fucking watermelon, and I'm young, exactly. You know, make feel great about those fucking to you know, she's going to combing for this anyway, anyway. So I had an apartment of Franklin towers, and you know, five in the morning. Two of the characters that I would become their worlds cross somehow. This Colonel from the marines, and Marvin who was a very streetwise. African American man. I'll say politically. Correct. And like the Colonel is five in the morning would be like you are, in my army son, and you will do ED's told and mom would be like mother fucker. Bullshit, mother fucker go a wall in shit, and he would come because when you're on Ambien and you did this without knowing. No, you gotta understand when you're on Ambien. You ever take Joey, okay? Surprise really gave me one. About six months ago, and I took it and I thought I was gonna start saying racial slurs. The people that's gonna call them names. This is what happens if you lay down and take an Ambien you're going to be out called in five minutes. But let's say by chance, you took the Ambien was fuck. I forgot to make this coal. Now, the ambient takes effect, so you have a sleep, and you have a wake, you know, you just hallucinating on this fucking thing. So that's what would happen to me some in the living room five in the MoMA, the fuck you don't talk to me like bitch, maybe you will be putting the brink you understand. I am a Colonel in the United States on it. You know. So now the lady next door would be leaving notes on the door like I don't know all people, but it has to stop. I haven't slept in two months and as yelling, karnal yelling at Marvin. All of a sudden hit comes on going. She would call them a Marvin. You need to lay down and go to sleep. You have to go to sleep. This is what's going on. You know, I put max to sleep that way. We've been talking about it. Yeah. I go little man you're going to go to school. You ain't gonna wind like me, you know. Shit. I never had the opportunity you had and shit. Amax twelve years old in his bed looking at Marvin laughing, like my father's nuts. So what happened is this woman moved out? Marvin because a mall in the current. And an opponent autograph, actress moved in. The whole apartment Nikki six started dating at the time. It great better better for me. You know, gives a fuck about that lady spin sorta lady that moved out speaking of Eleanor you and her on your Instagram has to be like one of the funniest things will entire world. We on meaning people wanna make show out of it. Now they can't even believe what what goes on with us. It's really let me just finish this, go ahead. Then we go back to Eleanor take no Joey on. People a I'm in so much anyway. So what hap- but she knows that, you know how I feel about them. I don't know whatever I say now is going to be the point is. That's not what sold Illinois to me. You know what I mean? Like when I liked, like I didn't even look at it. It's you know what I mean? Like in a sweatshirt, you see what I mean? It was more of the as no. Because the race was rounded in good way, like like any girl, I go with tits extra. Like I don't I don't hunt if I saw girl with the biggest tits in the world going holy shit. Now she worked by me, and she's got no s ago that girls being punished by God, because, you know to have tits like that face like that in no fucking ask decades. Never get married. That goes going to have to pay their own rent for the rest of the fucking light. Just got. No fucking understand. I don't wanna fuck an EMMY board him saying, I don't want to buy four it. I'll take a big fats, like like anybody. You know, in the tits, extra whatever it evens it out better. Right. You know what I mean? It's a pity on girls without a fat ass. Thank god. They throw an Anson today. You know what I mean? Yeah. But it's probably easier, though, Tim. Right. I'm just saying the girl, Tate's, right. No, I understand. And she's got no way. Look at me when I'm trying to explain it. It's a fucking pity. Right. No. Yeah. Like you get all this chick walking towards me. And then he goes no fucking like look at joing goes. No. Actually write it just goes gotta probably work fucking John's. Just the pay for com. She's probably driving fucking Prius, which sucks. Right. What I mean or mini coupe? Want to talk about cars. The point. I'm getting at when Roseanne I'm gonna lose my trank it of dot. Trank it track that word people know what I mean. My thought pattern. Okay. Roseanne was on like an Ambien whatever and she lost a job whatever. And when I saw that, that really bothered me because I know Roseanne for thirty three years, fringe all these years. And unlike fuck this, you know, and I waited for the right time. And we spoke, I just come to Vegas. I'm gonna bring you on bagels and the miniature came on standing ovation. Okay. Just to standing, I'll coming on and going off. What's great about Harry is he films, everything at the factory. So we got it all, you know, and that's when I was, and I said, I don't give a fuck, I go nobody ever got behind me. Okay. All these fucking comics these fuck and cots up is in 'oughts. And I'm not talking about, you know, I'm talking about the generation before, you know, I know you know, one not bells a you know what I mean. People like that bells would be on TV go, and he shouldn't be allowed to perform them going. He's filthy than may. Yeah, but I took care of him a long time ago on the stern show. Yeah, yeah, that was that was, and I love bells. Did his day. I love them. You know what I mean? I mean, he's you know, he did a great job with SUV would have, you know, the law and order thing, you know, but I'm saying, why would a guy like that going against a guy like me when you're filthy on stage? You know, it's one thing if it was signed, feld who didn't come up against me, you know, because he's smart. And he knows what I would do dice the fucking. Okay. You know, honestly, I've always, I've always loved that crew of Jerry Seinfeld, and Larry Miller, Paul rise, like that's a different kind of clean comedy, and seinfeld's, the best of that, you know, who's going to be better than that. I mean he actually thinks about what he's going to say on stage. That's unbelievable to me. I watch these fucking guys. Go on with the it used to be notepads. Now. It's the iphone let me go over just a fucking thrill. They're so excited. You're up there due to tuna bits and just fucking detain them. I wanna fuck and choke these guys to debt anyway. So when I saw with Rosanna said, I'm not going to be the guy that didn't help, you know, and I called her we're going to do it tour and everybody, you know, manager ragent everybody. So I call my agent pep auto you know who I'm with him and. Dennis foot thirty years. I mean, Pete was a twenty year old when I when, when I was with Dennis it first, and he was mentored by Dennis author. And now he's like one of the greatest come with girsch for, like movies and stuff. But for personal appearance, I've always been other than for like a year or two on and off with, with Dennis off RA. Am people auto peep, being my major agent right now? So I call Pete, and I go, listen, I got an idea. You know, I go I wanna go out with Roseanne. You got a problem handling. Like, would that be good feel you know and my agents, they don't handle comics handle Rockstars. They have like, you know, motley Crue Metallica. Billy Joel just did. What, what does he on sixtieth show at the garden once month? I mean, that's you know that's my other agent. That's Dennis off. That's what used to strategize with me for all the arenas. We did that together. You know. So he's handled, you know, everybody, you know. What's his name pissed away? Would you do what Joe cocker each handled everybody? It's all Rockstars. It's amazing. They probably have, you know, a quarter of the Rockstars in the world. Okay. So I called Pete, and I go would you handle Roseanne? You know and he goes done. I don't know problem with that's the difference. You know. So now going on sale putting a few shows on sale. One is. The paramount to paramount, which is which I got a call today. Go we pick two small fuck and place because it's it's like three-quarters sold out. It's on pre sale. It doesn't even go on sale tomorrow, Friday. So they are holding some tickets for the general public. We met up there to show that, you know, and the Atlantic City, it's, it's hard rock, hard rock live, which is a small Rena, which is also just tickets of flying ready as pre-sales. So I'm like, this is going to be the biggest comedy to, you know, to hit America in longtime, and it's Eleanor, of course. All right. So listen, when you hit it thing about the pin thing, just pay you more money for the shows 'cause Eleanor will open the shows, and then it's Roseanne myself. And maybe we'll do a little something that I just love like what we would dancing when we did the Las Vegas thing I put on this, like crazy song. We've started doing the. Dance whatever question. Yeah. You so line in. Fucking movie stars born. You said a wine that I watched the movie up to that part, and I've seen the movie so many times, HBO. I just watch the beginning. And when you said it, it was coming from dice, you said, so match and it was the story of dice. You said. When lady Gaga goes in the back, Utah, your friends, you know, you know, I knew a thousand guys were better than fucking Sonam out Sigme onto the fucking table. Tanatshai only stated on blue eyes, and that fucking sharks getting suit, and those shoes he became so mattress and all those other guys just went to the waste. Yeah. Just went nowhere. And that's what you knew my. Yeah. You hit the stage. There's no fucking pad as no no pairs. There's no room. Yeah. I just love to perform, like guys actually written in the script that, right? No, not at all that, but that was it written that I did. But not that when you said it, it was just, like, that's, that's a line that he would say no, he can understand because for regular act out of say that line, he would not understand what he'd be saying, because it's you know, it's organic, I you know, it's just organic. You know, have gone through forty how long you doing comedy now when he eight. Yeah, I'm doing it. Forty one forty, you know, like you know, it's like, when I think of like even the arena, days, let's say that's like a different lifetime ago. You know, like when, when I get on Instagram what the black and you hit, I don't wanna be that, you know, I hardly where the lead is anymore like going on in a t shirt and my jeans, you know, 'cause I've seen, you know, you know, I got a little angry with Sebastian for a while, because forget about dice influenced he was doing dice onstage in specials, and, and I love the gun, he opened from years ago, and we're only people open for me. I saw a potential, you know, and even back, then, I'd say it's too dicey, and then through the years, he got dicey, but then he came back to himself and originally, what got me mad at him was when he was on Mark marriage. Been talking and McMahon was asking them about opening for me. And, you know, asking to tell some stories which we have a lot of about hanging with me, and he wouldn't on stories, they went tell anything and I'm like, you know, the fuck is this, you know, it took you wonder my wing, so it got me it started getting angry and then comics would get angrier go, and he's like dice light when he's up there, you know with the leather jacket and but before he did the garden, which he did four nights, which is unbelievable. You know, I do love the guy. So when he went on the Howard Stern show and, and stirring, question them about me, he entered starring the right way. So I wrote a whole thing on Instagram about how great the guy is and, and to him like with you, you know, like I wouldn't want him to think like I wasn't behind them because there have been other comics now like Bill Burr has talked to me about the influence, I was in his life, and how he saw me at. Boston, the Boston Garden. And I think the Boston centrum and bills, one of the funniest you know that and he you know he plays drums. And when I was doing the arenas, I would end with a giant drum solo. I would play it to like an eight piece band. So I would do the Elvis thing I would do Travolta thing to grease lightning. I would even do some songs on. I would love won't. Let me wait by Luther Vandross, just with a keyboard player, and then I would do soul sacrifice with the band from Santana and go into a big drum solo. So Bill, I saw him. He was filming Bill Burr presents which Eleanor did a spot on for comedy central so went to taping and I'm going, I want you to play the drums onstage. She does I won't do it because that's what you did. But I also did arenas in doing that, you know, supply drums. If you wanna play the drums, come up with you one night, we'll do a double drum solo, you know, but I loved the influence, I brought, and I you know, when I was doing the arenas, I didn't think that others will ever going to do it. Like, you know, you gotta be a certain kind of Performa to be able to tend to taint twenty thousand people get myself that my whole life. I didn't study comics, I studied Elvis. That's the way studied, Elvis, buddy rich like the greatest of the greats. So when I made it I knew how to perform, you know, and but, but other comics have come along Joe Rogan. He's still in arenas. You know, you're doing big theaters, you know, Chapelle zone it, but I love, you know Kevin Hart is spoken about me in detail about what I did for him. You know, like when I'm thirty years old, I'm thinking about a guy that, you know, you know, two years old. Ten years old going, I wanna be that. But that's who I was watching Elvis, do the sixty comeback special. When I was twelve you know, going oh, could be that, but and I didn't mean as a singer, just the whole image of that person. And that's what I became an stand up and now 'cause so many comics all wearing leather jackets on stage. I'm going fuck that off on something else. You know because I've always said a trend. I don't I don't follow. I can't have every other comic way in a motorcycle jacket on stage and be going up with the motorcycle jacket. So I went to t shirts cut him out. You know, cut him a certain way, and, and trust me, it's it's a lot easier because some of my leathers weighed like twenty pounds Jesus. How's it all together? You got a couple hundred I have. Although still yeah, I have a mall now. And then I'll give a leather. Away like one if I like somebody, I'll give them like that were in concert, but not like dice rules, the dice, man cometh or the MTV. I have all of that stuff. Yeah. You don't get that for my son's you know, you don't get that stuff away. You know it's funny how. Richard Pryor introduce me comedy. Dangerfield made me thought about doing comedy and you Bush me over the edge, you push me. That's coal thing. You push me. It's like I knew once I saw you let me know I could do it. You will let me know why you were shooting you could do this. That's you know, which liked by flou- for the late. Yes, I plan in your ass. All that stuff was what I was thinking. So at first I was pissed if like the first week this motherfucker stole, my shit don't even know. Many stole my shit round my fucking head. Let straight, it's straight Yuma. So it was so relatable to me. And then I, I showed everybody would listen. It was that type of campaign like anybody who would listen, my, my in-laws from buffalo Catholic. I'm having my father in law in the room with the door locked for canal fucking Howlin. It's okay. Crazy. Do you have dates for this special anywhere for the store yet? Well, they go on sale tomorrow. I'm only putting this is what's nuts just should've released like twenty dates, but you know, they'll be more next week. You know, 'cause these just these are going to be sold out tomorrow, you know, and like I said, one of them, you know, is a cut down arena, and, you know, when my agent called me today goes, the pre sales ridiculous. You know, that's exciting news, because I want this to be giant because like I said, I just didn't like them, squashing this girl who's entertained millions of people, a whole adult life. And because, you know, we're living in a world where you just say something, and you lose a career, not even do something you say something, and you being held accountable. You know, when pe-. People are getting off of murder, you know, they're walking. But yet you said something and everybody oh, they shouldn't. They shouldn't be on TV. You know, so I was like fuck that we're going to, you know, you know, like, you know, and that's why the name is so great Mr. and MRs America, you know. And I look at it like making America laugh, again, because people, you know, mediocre has become the new, great, my son, max told me, he goes like when I watch these comedy specials like I'll give it up. If somebody's great, I wanna laugh, my bowl to I'll be honest when I watched a bring back Sebastian again, and I hope his this, because I watched him it was at Radio City musical was his last special. And I sat there with my son Dylan laughing like an idiot because, now, you know, it's hard to watch someone if you pissed off at them and you haven't talked to him about it. You know. So like once once my mine. Mind was cleared. And I heard how we spoke to how it and it was a little great. And even said something about me in Hollywood reporter, like a week ago like on, you know, I was childhood heroes. So that's shitty should have been saying, Maron, just say it, what's the big deal, you know. So, so we watched him at Radio City, and I'm going sterile and he was being himself. You know what I mean? That's what I loved. He liked came back to his voice like you know, what I'm talking about money on stage. You know, and I go, so I paid the guy in k. But now you turn on a comedian and he's doing it. Exactly like going. What are you when impersonator that would make me angry? And I got every right to get angry at that. But when I see the guy come back to himself because fame as a funny place when you start getting famous and, you know, about it now, when all of a sudden you walk through a mall people fucking no. You would a movie theater and people. Okay. Get a picture with you. It's a funny place to be, you know, so everybody goes through different things when they become famous and how how much fame, so I I'm a guy that I think handled it pretty good because I never became reclusive I go by myself everywhere, I carry a pipe. You know what I mean? I don't need a team of security when I have a pipe in our people see the pipe wrapped around my wrist. They. Maybe he doesn't wanna take a picture. Got a fight with his chick right now. You know, just doesn't look like he's a picture, taking guy at this moment, it's got to foot pipe with a leather strap around his wrist, so, but I'm saying, I always people used to ask me, you actually bring your own cleaning and go to the gross. Like I never understood that when you become reclusive, it's the worst thing because you can't go back from that you, you know, what are you going to reteach yourself, how to be amongst people owing to sit at a coffee shop new sit around all of frayed like an asshole. I remember corn Howard Stern. This is great. The we went house on thing. Which he regretted people always regret. Hanging with me. Always thrilled to meet me, and then it gets to the point where they say things like I'm sorry. I ever said a loaded sky understand. You know, but the first time they meet you, it's an honor and then it gets out. Then it's four in the morning calls. You know what you doing? What do you mean what am I doing? I'm sleeping you know what would I be doing it for thirty AM? I gotta get up in an hour for shoot. You know, echo put your up already. You never finished army to story about like one time I called Daniel Baldwin right? And I don't know he's in New York fuck do I know where he is? And. And it was five in the morning. You know, and I go, what are you doing? Any goes dice. I gotta get up in an hour go. Yeah. But you now you're up, you know. So you would tell me the story, you met the red headed girl. And it goes can't we do this another ton Cup. What you're all right. You're not going to be able to go to sleep. If we talked, you know, so we might as well bullshit, a half hour, and then you go some hanging, the phone of dice, you'll have to hear about the redhead another. All right. That's up to you. But don't call me back. Once you can't sleep. Don't call me back and hang up. But you to never call them again. I mean, I've seen him since they won't. Talk late at night. You gotta call make. It. So I go house hunting, how it stern. This is like around I wanted to live on the east coast because they couldn't get my parents to, to move out here. So I wanted to be around family that was, you know, it was overwhelming do what I was doing. So. He takes me house, hunting, and Long Island. He gets a real estate agent. And if you know, I'm always filming the video camera while you filming a why not, why can't what are you what, don't fill me. Well, why not your who I'm with, you know, and then if we pull up to a house that I didn't like the outside the woman would get out, and I, I'm not going. He goes, can't you just go in? She made the appointment you know, I don't like the outside. So there's no reason to. It's a waste of time. I'm lying. I go in. Let me go Tele. So he goes, and we do the whole house on thing thing. Then at the end of the day, he goes, let's get something need. I go. Yeah. Let's go to Dina you know, go on. He goes, I get this great little talion place, we go downstairs. I go how it's one the after noon. I don't wanna go to talion place. I want to go diner and have a Berga and nobody's going to bother us. You got understand this wasn't the Howard Stern, you know that became big throughout the whole country. You know, he was only big really, you know, probably New York Philly he was building. So I get him to Dina which is empty, by the way. Nobody there other than the waitress and at the end she has for both their autographs. It wasn't the cell phones. We gotta stand there now. And then they go came out blurry go fuck yourself, taking him other one. That's it. I'm leaving. So it was just autographs. And then I called him about an hour later, I went to kings plaza shopping centre in Brooklyn where I had an apartment in Brooklyn. Not even a house in a brick building. Okay. And I call them up I go, how do you know where am right now? Reclose go. I mean kings plaza buying black jeans financial Coliseum. Nobody's bothering me. Don't just stay in don't become reclusive. It's, it's just not a good thing. If you don't know how to walk out of your house by yourself. You know, I don't like guys like axel a reclusive. It's like what good is any of it. If you can't just go United just gotta get out. I don't need a team with me. I don't need a bunch of people looking around pulling up and fucking SUV's. I want an nice coughing. I wanna slurpee. You know, I don't need a team I need my car. I need me and I need the pipe that's it without a team that you're unnoticed, without a team, you know, this, you walk in, you people don't even know you're gonna seem you some all over the place. People don't even throw on a baseball hat, people have no idea. Yeah. I standard table losing hundreds of thousands, nobody even notices of than the casino beautiful. You lost hundreds of thousands of us. Don't you know exactly look at the life, I get to lead. That's why could lose one hundred grand get on stage. You'd never you'd think one hundred grand. Yeah, I've the gambling and the my life was I quit now. So I don't gamble now. But yeah, I've gone. I've lost a half a million to clip one half a million at a clip in minutes. This isn't like how much you've been a hand. Well when when those kind of plays would happen. I'd be playing all six bucks at, like ten grand a hand cheese. So let's say you just lost one in their sixty thousand. Yeah, but let's say you get a winning hand a couple black jacks, a couple double downs. You win one hundred thousand a minute hope. Yeah but you don't play with what you don't have. You can't have fear when it comes to gambling, because that's all it is, is you take an chance, so you gotta have brass balls. And you've got to be willing to lose not win lose everything in front of you to win. That's the only way you do. One anybody playing scared is gonna lose always in life at anything. You know, if you go on a stage and you don't open up you never gonna make it, you know, if you have frayed the crowd you never gonna make, you know, they were rules of engagement with everything, you know. Same thing with bang, bang into a fucking Haro gives a shit. You know she can't take this kind of banged. She shouldn't be my cheque. Right. You know what I mean? With everything you just do the best you could with everything. That's all I look at life Andrew, you fucking beauty. What, what a philosophy of? These people wanna go is going to be a website for Mr. and MRs America. It's on sale. It's onset, you could call them. Who are they live nation? No, not loving nation. Might be the paramount theatre man to these the, the, you know, the hard rock and not exactly it's going to be more on sale now because this is just this is estimating quickly quicker than I thought it was absolutely. You know, Roseanne ready around. Yeah. She, we were on the phone the other night, all excited, she's complete because she did a couple of shows already this, this month and just on her own just to get a feet wet, and she got standing those and you know she loves it, like we love it. You know. And she's always been a great, great comic. I was talking about how, you know, years ago when people would heckle her. She's the first girly of sore look at somebody in the crowd, and go suck my. Tuck and dick, you know, and this is a woman. We've had some fun to, you know, she's that was one time I went gambling with Roseanne when I was doing the dunes, like I could do the dunes comedy star Michi winning believe me till I would show like the money or the chips inbet- fifteen hundred week when I did the comedy store at the Doon so tell this before my career took off. You get one hundred set. It did fifteen sets the week. So in between sets go out when twenty thirty thousand I would take like two hundred bucks, just Paul lay and just win. And go back to do my next show. The comics would come to Mitzi. It's even wanna see that she didn't want she want to gender thumb. That's how she was. That's just, you know, she loved being the mother of the comics, whatever. So she'd tell like who. Whatever comic would run back to the dice just one thirty thousand dollars in between no Eden, no wait in a comeback Mitzi. What's this fake? I go of why would I lie about it took two hundred dollars? Just beat them. That's all a big deal. Commonsense makes you win. Stupid sense makes you lose. That's it. You either on your game rough game that you'd go headed. You do that. I go, I don't even know. I just know how to do it. It's one time with kennison you're gonna love this because. He always had a thing with me because, you know, he wasn't a shop looking guy. And I was that's the bottom line, you know, and it was always the two of us on late at night at the store, and I loved the guy, you know, like I was thrilled when he made it but he couldn't handle my success, because I made his success look like he was a club comic. You know, I'm doing two nights at the garden and he's, you know it didn't matter anymore with him. That's what happened. So we're doing so tell and he's already making I'm I'm doing well making it as an act of because I was doing the Michael Mantua crime story. So it was almost like a showdown in the middle of the casino. And the one thing that's very real about me onstage off, is my confidence. It's just there. So we meet in the middle of the casino. He's coming from the front door. And he was dating Tamayo at sukey at the time and I'm a training, we've been dating, like, I don't know what year so we meet in the middle of the casino. It's just this face off. You know, he's like how you doing this? You know, going, great just killer show. Yeah. When some money because, you know, you're going to win. I always win Sam that anything do go, I'll show you. This is true Trini, if she was sitting here, she get out. Kinda watch this trick. And there's a slot machine. Right. He'll say, okay. So take ten bucks. I go watch this, and I put the ten in, you know, and it just play for the whole amount a big wishing right? Ten thousand dollars right there. Then that's what I'm talking about. I always fuck him when and he I thought he might pass out because the look in his face was like decision movie like a setup in a movie, where guy walks over puts him one dollar and wins all the ten thousand dollars, just right there with the bill's going off the money fallen out. It's who I am. You know. Vice your fucking savage. Like that took the fog in time. I'll always do your show. I always love it. I've been sitting here and all. Happy that I followed you leave is here. I am. Because the Yuba well, I'm you know, I talk about a lot 'cause I'm really proud of what you're accomplishing and keep building on, you know, it started feel like about five years ago, as far as your Bill, you know, you know, and I hear it all because Kate opens for me sometimes. So we'll talk about you, our Lord Eleanor. Hey, I'll yell at one. We're on the road like it gets to the point that I'll go do you know anything about the history of comedy? You know, like I'll get mad at high go as Joey about, like, I'll tell like upon my history that sounds like unreal. I go just as Joey, right? Because he knows it all he, he's e- cmih, do what I go. What do you think his his an example, I'm playing some club in Arizona. And when Eleanor can't do the gig. I have Kate do. And I don't wanna I don't wanna bring money but she told me like what you charge at the door. I go really I go, I think he should do more. You know, it's travelling across the country. Whatever she goes, what are you charge? I don't know. At least fifty you know, go to club, so they need to make money to afford me, you know, it's three hundred seats, whatever the fuck it, and she got no charge. So I go, and I don't even know what that charge so little while later with the manager at a club, I go, and with Kate and I go can you tell me ago because I care like this is what I'm getting for the weekend. I'm all good with it. Okay. How much charging the door because, well, you know, the, the golden circle seventy five around the stage. And then, you know, general admission's fifty five you know, she goes, no goes dead dice. So I'll always say to her, because I know you closely go. Yes, Joey knows my whole history. You don't know anything, you know, you're too, busy, just taking pictures. You know what I mean? You should. Learn opening for it might be good, you know, so yell at her about that stuff. But you've funniest I've stood when we're going to see Ford fucking family in the movie then in pain. So I know the foot. That's what I'm saying. See, she doesn't know this stuff. She'll bring up deny you were on CNN with. Yeah. What ninety million hits something like that. You know, when I again, CNN Fokin in his mouth so newscast. I don't I it's not ninety million, but it's millions of hits that, that God, you never heard from that guy again. Oh, the one that you stop the interview. Yeah. When he goes you running a gym. This is CNN. Running a gym with flux. You get your information and that was it. Once I curse now I'm gonna destroy the gun. I mean. I mean, but that's why. But I'll be honest with all the movies and all that. You know that's all great. And I actually get bored on a movie set I hate the waiting around. I can't take it even come over to Bradley when we were doing the stars on that scene. You were talking about with the sing people under the table, you know, Sinatra with, and I went you wanna get out of here, ready. You know. You know. He's looking at me go, what do you mean get at we'll filming a scene. How much you're gonna film looks to me like you got it. You know what are you going to film, the toaster? Now, you gotta get the fuck out of here, coffee assume. It's done. Like you know how much I know you knew what this shit. But, like howling wanna hang around here. You know it gets really boring. To me, you know. So the live thing is, you know, nothing like it just nothing like clubs ity absolute greatest to perform in, but, you know, I'm going to go into these big places again because this is a bigger than life show. So you have to, you know, still doing, and I applaud you that, that if you want to get tickets for dice and Mr. MRs America tour go on pre Salem. No, there aren't around tomorrow, that tomato cry. They go on fucking sale. Open up at the Pam on the-the at the Hard Rock Cafe. Atlantic City, and they'll be more hard rock live hot rod rock live. If you need dates if he tweets them, our tweet them for your right? Thank you. That's it. And that's that the show is brought to you by him. Four hymns dot com. A one stop shop for hair loss skincare, and sexual wellness cement need all the help. 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AWTY 62 - Yeehaw Kanto (Pokemon: Indigo League with Khoi Dao)

Are Weeb There Yet?

1:19:00 hr | 11 months ago

AWTY 62 - Yeehaw Kanto (Pokemon: Indigo League with Khoi Dao)

"Sir Hello and welcome to our there yet. An exploration and education and Anna May. I'm your enemy idiot Patrick Dugan. I'm an anime expert. Dana Hollander and I'm Brendan McCarthy. Your anime research trapped in a Caputo Buddha costume. Don't king chain I will. Hey Yeah. Research is Is a funny way of saying you're going to the ferry convention convention. It is a fun way of saying it. That's why I say is impose shelly. Yeah a prehistoric not possibly. I don't know well let. Let's get some pokemon assistance to sort out. What type of furry? Yeah we have a guest this week you know him from the detective P Q game poke Amman masters and the new game. The after party we're joined by Dow is off. Is it safe from you to come out yet here. Now come on out is is the seasons no dougans been keeping me in his filing cabinet colored led lights hooked up to it to indicate indicates to me. Whether or not I can or cannot move or speak Just turn green so. I'm assuming typically as I'm recording. I need you to sit a silently as possible but I'm going to let you speak this time this time. Okay Oh my goodness this atmosphere. We've created uh-huh Schilling we're visual storytellers. Baby would be weird to have me on as a guest. If I wasn't you know allowed to articulate anything business like we were promised. We promise he's here he just he's totally he's giving the thumbs up throughout. So is our other guests. Rodney dangerfield running. Yeah Rodney Rodney. uh-huh why isn't he dead. Oh no this is a terrible way to find out. Move Past. We've facet gosh it back to POK Mon.. No it's a dangerous field field of coke on battle Hey Ah Shit oh my goodness well it. It's time both for Brendon to finally die. And talk about the long-awaited series we're we're we're going ultimate classic for the close out of our four kids marathon. We're going to go and watch Indigo League of the original original POK Mon.. Yeah Yea Yea Oh gee the good star to chip. Yeah this This is Ben Recommended by several people But it was sort of inevitable that we would get here so I don't have your names So thank you for suggesting it of course we are going to get to it a little But yeah where this is such a classic. Of course. We've all seen it but I want to touch into everyone's specific pokemon history. I as a child didn't understand it. They bought a Pokemon Moon when it came out and I tried to play it and still didn't quite understand it but boy do I. I love these little friends. I love him on. Purely aesthetical POKEMON. Oh Yeah I have a Pope Leo plenty I love. I love those boys. Can we all say what our favorite POK MON is. Two Minds Baldassare. I Love Boat Massari. Oh we did a poll recently on twitter. What about this? We did. So shouts out shouts out to Everybody that voted for bulbs or because Boldizsar one. If your favorite wasn't it's an another one lucar which was the other one that one or Lula would what I already forgot. Miodrag Dragon Shit didn't win. So Yeah Brendan. What what? What's your POK Mon.? History was their day one. I remember friend of mine visited. Ah Pokemon read because he wanted to play and I was like let me see. He's like no he wasn't my friend anymore. Spark the interest being denied access to it and assumes I could I got into it and just like way into it I think I skipped like Gen four and then maybe like six but otherwise I got a pretty good understanding of games shows unnecessary amount of furry firs ation of the. There's a specific term dench E or. Did you cheer Jink Jingo. Maybe where it's like turning the pointed to humanize versions of them and I know exactly we're talking about a So I'm teeth indicating about porn. We're always always like one or two steps away from Porno especially me. I'm not proud of it but Ginga to close. This took a drastic turn Matt. I was not liking fat to them. All uh-huh I work for Nintendo. I want to put this out there. It does something before working your your experience. Oh my goodness pokemon came on the scene when I was but a wee child and interestingly a week child who did not speak singlish so my yeah. My first experiences with POK MON was when I was still in When I only spoke French so I played pokemon and French French and I watched the French dub of the POKEMON anime? Oh Wow yeah yeah I mean you know I had a and I had a pretty as expected reaction from kid coolies. Should I get the edibles defied bobby. It was the game boy color and she's like no. You're masten them like okay but I wore her down. And she got me again boycotted for Christmas and I would proceed to get halfway through the game before. Losing my Gameboy on the train. That was like the worst of my life. If you'd still have maybe toy story and trying to find its way back. Maybe it's yes. Yeah Moss Gameboy yeah and the plaque is like some dumb ass kid lost this time. Gain delays what freaking loser. What about you Dugan Yeah as I've mentioned previously I didn't really grow up as a Nintendo kid as a Indoctrinated Sony Boy So I only I played. I watched the show. Of course growing up I have specific specific memories of watching the premiere of the DUB that is weirdly one of my first memories as being like. Oh Hey this new new show. It's called poke Amman. Okay so I remember watching it as it came out for the first time but for the Games when I was a freshman in college I played a read on an emulator and I still have yet to beat it. uh-huh leded full pokemon game. Hey so many things but yeah the switches. She's the first like console. I've had from Nintendo. I've had a Gameboy S. P. But I I at that point I was like. I don't know what this POK Mon thing is. It was a cartoon. I don't need to play the game to watch it. I don't have to put effort into it I already we know the story does. I don't need a unique experience with it personally bond with individual pokemon on my team. I look for whom but yeah I'm so certain shield which is about to come out as this episode airs is going to be the first first one I get and hopefully finish fingers crossed knock on Wood Jr.. Yeah like I did my chosen. I've just since I played on an emulator. Don't sue me Nintendo. But like I had it on a laptop so it was like bulky and I didn't have the convenience of like a DS or one of the hand held consoles where it was out on so so. This is going to be the first time I have that convenience NAN exciting. I remember being thrown in my house because my dad said I need to go outside and play more in the sunshine instead of being locked up room. so He'd locked me out of the House for six hours and I just sat on the car played poker game on. I'll show you you dad muscles L. Real drunk in Rhode Island and wonder Oh my cousins point Pokemon Mongo those love though. Yeah I can't wait until Pok Mon just exists because I feel like the POKEMON company will not rest until physical pok oakmont till the debris work in secret somewhere underneath Tokyo. Google alert for like when the POKEMON COMPANY BUYS UP STOCK DOC IN. I don't know biochemical engineering or something. A sign intendo. Twenty-three in me so they air. You're you're welcome on Mojo and also your DNA that's though but also what. If resident evil is just failed. Poke Amman experiments. It's real and they're just turn into monsters it all time off every video. Please don't give them more ideas. Yeah it's all well so we we picked a couple of select episodes because we know how this show starts we. We've we've we know what's up so we went through and pick some favorites both of the world in general and our personal picks worlds. So Yeah Coy Requested watching the episode where Brock gets his volt picks Any significance for that episode. For you yeah volt picks. That's cute as we didn't. We didn't get your favorite POK Mon.. Is that Volpe six. Okay let's before everybody rolls. It is my favorite. My favorite POK. Mon is mud Kip which I liked before before the mud me was okay. I'm sorry if I get very defensive about this but everybody was like. Oh you just like it because of the Mimi and no no no. You don't understand history here. Appoint playing pokemon Emerald was a very strategic thinker. Her and considered that mud kip evolved into poke him on that. It was a mutual electricity when against the ground type therefore reducing its weaknesses to just one type which the least damaging type so essentially market is the strongest starter in pokemon universe. Thus far I picked them to you get much shot up in their battle done. Yeah over. Yeah Oh my God so did like if you encounter a coup crest type poke your swampers dead looking. Yeah Yeah for you in a mud. Keeps a great. I liked him before it was cool. G GET AH audio might have peaked a little there when I know how understand so yeah I also didn't and say mine of course it's my boy farfetched because he's just a duck study. I am so excited for the new farfetched in in Shield or sword which trial. I think it's one of them yield. Yeah right right one do. It's an shield. It's shield because I remember noting really wanting surf etched but also really not wanting the weird shield dog legendary because that just looks like a dog got its head stuck in a thing the other one is like a bad ass wall all for the sort in its mouth which I don't know if it's a part of its body or if it found us our it's tone confused fetch is fighting type. It doesn't make sense anyway to go deep into the Games we need to talk about the show so yeah. We're going to touch on some classics. We're GONNA watch episodes twelve seventeen and twenty seven that is skurdal squad island of the giant. Poke Amman and the introduction of Bolton They got my team. I'm ready to go. I'm ready to fight. I'm ready to kill tyler murder with some. Poke Amman on Oh shit is it. Just all squirrels just all sorts. All skurdal Joshes but you can discern that there's a hierarchy based on the shape of very glasses yes we got general skurdal And the grunts. Yeah there's there's there's Communist skurdal heavens that Newbie Squirrel who just joined the team. But he's the the transition sunglasses inside regular glasses outside at sunglasses. He'll get there you'll get there. He'll learn his as he ages is The the shade will darken permanently But yeah let let's. Let's jump right in. We're we're starting out with our with our team team the square deal squad so it's Of course right off the bat we got. We got that I asked you it. It's a classic we it so good. It's like it's part of my workout mix for the gym. All right it takes. I like Pok Mon Joe Toe better than than the than the original opening. I know I'm probably GonNa get crucified for saying that. I am unfamiliar with that one really. Yeah I don't think I've seen much of any pokemon besides besides this Indigo League the sun and moon openings. Old Genuine Bob very good song. Yeah that sounds good anyway. Scoreless go but yeah so yeah we start out where We a series of episodes where all the Starters arturs joined the team so they asked just picked up Charm Mander and Boba sore. And now we get the introduction of Squirrel title so so our gang of ash misty and brock are walking into a town when they fall into a pit. It's Doug by the SKURDAL squad. A team of prankster squirrels. That are are running amok causing havoc raising. How long do you think it took? Does anybody turtles to dig that. Big asshole thirty seven minutes. Those shovels they had to shovels. They're not big enough to get out or like if they can produce like sufficient friction by spinning on their shelves. They you could probably just drill down. Get the dirt wet. So it's nice and easy to move pokemon logistics. That's why I'm here. So here's all about the world building. Interestingly the polkadot identifies turtle I mean skurdal as the turtle poke Amman which implies the existence of actual just normal regular turtles hurdles. Yeah world like they have turtles as a point of reference for SKURDAL's regular animals which is really Lille ceaseless. When they eat fish there'll be a crash? That's what if it's magic hard. No hello. This is an episode before Sandwich. James skipped sold. Imagine well at least we needed and he buys it in the scales are rock-hard even good as food poor magic but the polkadot says that piggy. Eat Magic hard don't they or like there's some very Hard beaks then. Maybe can't you just eat them. Whole bound probably put them on each and every other pok? Oh come on. Let's leave it at that chain. It's a wild west for the answer is don't think about got it what what does Oregon tastes like. Anyway it's just digital anyway we Nope we get their introduction introduction of skurdal as the Turtle Pokemon and they try to capture or ashes like fuck. Yeah gotTA steal one of these boys and Tries to have peaked. You fight it to Steal it but they all run away because they hear sirens from officer. Jenny Going up so we get officer Jenny. And we get the establishment that it's There's an officer Jennifer every town because they're all cousins Jenny. We have terrible parents. That's another great dogs. Think about it. I just don't think about it which officer Jenny which nurse joy by their hats different symbols the character designer. Didn't WanNa work that hard. Listen I got a Lotta polka monitor. All Yeah we're GONNA look similar. Please lease these book an idiot. Kids won't care but Jenny picks them up takes them into town down and warns them that the skurdal squad is made up of all deserted pokemon who were abandoned by their masters and they banded together and resorted to being pranksters because they all hate humans now which is relatable fair there yes and we are As they as the team leaves the police headquarters we see team. Rockets spying on them We we get we get our gay icons Jesse James US. It's using watching the show. Everyone to be ash gang. In hindsight everyone wants to be Jesse James what I wouldn't give their storyline watching it as an adult it just this works so well because they are the outcast. They're the losers they're like trying to make Papa team rocket proud also Zaba Arousa. James Comes from money doesn't he. He's filthy rich like he like. He's a rich kid so he's just doing this refund because he can and I think justice porous hell. Oh is she yeah. She grew up eating snow like she made like little rice cakes. That broke my heart. It's a real sad episode. Could Oh my God yeah pokemon get sad. She feels out of out of med school or something in school. She has some other going. Yeah she failed amount. We already have nurse joy. You can't be a medical professional like the one nurse Sir Sir but yeah. They're they're spying because they're plotting to steal Pika chew when they are surrounded by the swirl squad who wants. It's a steal their picnic steal picnic basket so they're They surround them. They a are they. Also fall in the conveniently. Placed pit got So they are captured and they say hey rather offend robbing us have out we rub these fucking children Let's let's band together. Also so isn't it's like another classic instance of my Jelly donuts. Jelly filled donuts. When they're obviously donning all of the J. Players I mean I like ah like the the line could have easily been adapted to just be ambiguous about whether foods were like? Oh they're eating our frigging food to call call attention to to what items classic four kids needing to relate it to American foods. They're like I'm tired of pizza and in tacos anything else. Oh No. These skurdal's are eating jelly doughnuts. And she says he's like we get Chinese food. Oh you're establishing China exist in the world they could have picked other. You don't even see it. You can just sit anything and but yet the SKURDAL squad doesn't trust their proposition because they were all abandoned by human so they don't trust them. Yeah so so Miao comes up with the plan that meow owns Jesse James and they are subservient South South So the Squirrel squad can trust the leader newsouth because math is a polka mom can talk. Yeah so We get we get them the the teaming up and the gang is out fishing but a squirrel. Yeah I don't no. The passage of time is weird because one of the skurdal squad is just hanging out in the rivard waiting to squirt them as their fishing Pika chewed tries to fight and the shocks everyone. Because they're all wet and in the fight. Pika Chu is knocked into the water where where he's Stabbed in the but by Goldfine nice and is knocked out. He's he's down for the count. I love the people get to the leader. Has the leader. Scott has the girl glasses but then all the other ones have done little round glasses and look like Paul Shaffer for David. LETTERMAN's Taisho sideshow. Just all Honorary Beatles but yeah the Skurdal squad captures choose them while peak. itchy was drowning. I guess so. They're all captured. They get lassoed and brought to a cave where meow meow confronts and says they're going to steal the peak achile who is now caged and passed out So ashes like. Hey you dude you gang of thugs this meow fucking sucks. Don't believe them but they're like no we'RE GOING TO TRUST THIS POK mon over human men so go to hell Ash. But as they're all captured PECA CHU is dying just chronic wounds dying. And they're like okay we gotta get him a super potion or he will be dead Let's if you want to steal a living picot you We got a we got to revive him so they don't trust ash but they say go. Get your medicine but if you're not back by noon the next day we're GONNA die misty's hair purple. Oh Man Yeah what a threat. You're GONNA save me. One Hundred Bucks said at their on he was on board with it. Like Oh fuck yeah punk ship docks. I don't need to go to scissors and get a makeover. So they ashrams away to the next town trips and falls because he's a dumb kid that's the best obstacle that could come up with over nothing upper. Yeah he gets the classic Rickety drawbridge which of course collapses and he falls in the water and also get stabbed by golden on and eventually Lee. He gets to the town of but is knocked out by his rival Gary leaving the shop slams the door in his face and he's out cold he's he's like knocked down for like twelve hours. It's the next day yeah. No what if this kid alleyway it was a baroness. Yeah let's leave this ten year old. Just dead on the store. Fine I mean it is the old West for some reason in this town and well Speaking of the old West when ash wakes up he wakes up to Jesse James. Just straight straight up armed robbery. Just they have guns. Why don't they ever use the gods instead of their poke him on because clearly a snake in the poison ball? Don't do anything. It's there was a canonical war lieutenant. Surge was only true at the very least the existence of guns implied applied. But they fight Kokomo on. It's like they give the Pokemon guns sure you you haven't seen anything until you've seen Gigli `push just down a group of Kabuga done tape to executory toward the there's no arms story So yeah they robbed the store and in typical anime fashion may just shout out their plan. Saying Yeah. We're GONNA use this to betray the skurdal squads. They'll give us all your flash lashed bombs And ashes like no. They're going to get double crossed. I got to immediately get back there. so he goes inside and and all the shopkeepers and people inside who just got robbed now outgun apparently they also have cuts that are packing they saw this is is this must be like rural just yeehaw fund. Is there going come on on with a gun I mean. Let's get surf etched evolved and see what that swords and there's Pokemon that are literal swords towards the airport. Where them on with guns? Where's the gun pokemon is there those are what is his tie? God bless toys cannons. Someone else has to have a gun. Who here hasn't gone? Raise your hand. Honestly I'm surprised. No one has just loaded cannon ball into a blast toys just like yeah just a propellant with water but the main thing is that the Canon ball that were firing got people or voltage into a blast. Though it's interesting comment what we're here with the quake pokemon. Oh come on hacks. This was also leaked about the canonical. But Oh yes. Oh Officer Jenny Saves this boy from being held up by a store. Full of people with gun would shoot this child. He gets the potion and officer surge. Any takes them back to the cave where he goes in through the secret side entrance conveniently in writing bridge. And they're like oh we'll just go around. It wasn't really a big factor. Oh the perfectly fine bridge. That doesn't collapse was ten feet down the road So they climb into the cave Everyone is outside because they're about to try to steal the Pika. Chew Jesse James Flyover with their MEA th it hot air balloon and they just start fucking bombing Bombing run on this skurdal squad. Yeah it is general bombed. Isn't it. Yeah they're like. Hey yeah flash bombs but they're just straight up explosives like Flash Bang like a blind blind them and run away but whatever Oh in the league pokemon sprites from way back of designs. They didn't use there's remedy gramma can't who evolves into the The octopus one. I forget but that was supposed to be like a handgun fish and octopus supposed to be like a tank so There would have been a canonical gun but they changed it. Because of the epidemic of gun violence in EBB. Interesting Americans can deal with Food being named but they can't it deal with the acknowledgement of a on that cheery now back to the bombing coming. That's involving children and Turtles Steals Pichu and they And hops back up in Ed balloon and everyone runs to the cave for cover but a poor skurdal get sucked on. Its back so aw became they can take pits. You can encourage water from thinking is internal Goddamn turtle couldn't grow your shell like thirty feet in the air to like it's been attack but just still laying flat on your back death but ash of course being a noble savior savior jumps over and covers the skurdal from bombing because Boy Flesh is a lot stronger than a turtle Shell So he absorbs the explosion and seeing the love of a human again. This is like okay. Now I'm going to choose to jump up and save you exactly now. He can jump and hold a full grown child over. Can't flip over but can throw a child and himself off from the back but yeah now now that they're bonded Ash Has Skurdal. Use his water gun to knock the balloon wound down and team rocket blasts off again and the squawk while gets government jobs as. Yeah Yeah. Yeah the bombs start a forest fire and The skurdal squad teams up and they put it out so officer Jenny a Them as town fire department squad. They get little jackets Komodo rooms but yeah so of the the leader now bonded with ashes going to join the team and that's that's the episode takes off. His sunglasses is our beautiful socialized actualized. Take off your glasses. Let down your hair. Your I really want. The leader of the squirrels squad ought to have a full back Tattoo on Shell. Yakuza leader off. It's so rad. I wonder if he passed on his glasses to another member of the escorial squad so they could be the leader. No because they go back in a later episode and they're just part of the fire department and when she gets real the don their glasses quast again so he's still got him That Oh shit. Yeah what if what if the SKURDAL squad had guns to focused on Pok Mon with guns guns taped to their shells. Could you imagine that was like the ultimate defense offense combination. Oh yeah that's true. See that's just them practicing for when they yes. Yeah I want to be able to. They're back playing with a fake sword. Work Sense man so so the moral of the episode is you can reduce Skurdal Street street. Gang violence with the universal jobs guarantee fire department. which apparently that town didn't have before? Yeah in this world. It's the pokemon Emerald new deal anyways. You Ah jump ahead to team. which is I'll of the giant pokemon? Excuse me and we got started on with another previous on. And it's the gang on a raft out in the middle of the ocean for some Goddamn reason and a swarm of Garretta's just start doing dragon dragon rage and signed him up. Hurry and launch them off. The Guy knows where which is very concerning if your tan or any other age. It's a very very big problem through a lot. I mean this is what happens when he cursed my house for Eternal Youth. He's got to enter this on his child body they get launched off and then they all wake up on a beach but ash finds out all of the spoken. Want on to which at this point. I don't remember what they are or we never see him in the subset which yeah he never pulls them out to be like. Hey who who is here. Who's roll-call I think one of them's menopause and I don't remember what the other one is? And then we cut to. We see Jesse James Stuck like waist-deep head down in the sands and face down ass up and think now. Jesus Christ we see a little crabby run over. And he's like hey these things he pokes moving by chance and just chops them in the legs and then runs off. Because CRABBIE's a little shit and I I love him and he's run regularly and they're missing their pokemon as well along with me Al and then they find ran a phone booth because it's ninety s and we had these back in the day and Throwing oh well we'll use this call the boss and then it cuts away. We see peaked. Chew Luckily being the only one out of its ball because the picture as able to release all the other out of their balls so we got to charm Andrew under bulbs or squared all the main ones. They're wandering around trying to figure out what happened where everyone is and they find a slow poke. Maybe we'll slow. Hey Hey where are we look at what's going on what's happening so we'll just gets up. Scoot bag a bit and it drops onto the water fishing and that's it I love this. I was smiling the whole time. 'cause they're just all talking to each other and they have subtitles all these pokemon apple all conversations. I love it must be common. They all understand each other slowcoaches running on his own time. He don't care he's got today's squirrel or just sit back vibe in on the beach dealing. Hey let's say bad. Just service city like a caveat et arbs. Open this boy. He's actually pretty mischievous. And Sassy ASEAN this one. This one's still gotta earn ashes. Still has his trust so I spoke of entering off. Now it's time and Charmaine Diseases. Jesus tail to guide them all with the light and suggesting like Oh maybe we got abandon maybe left and this is what I realize all the Pokemon Sir. All of ashes pokemon damaged goods. They all got baggage that quick. They'll be like no. You can go like like Super Ema. Oh Yeah I guess. I can't trust anybody. Well he's the one with the whips dark shoot them. Yeah and run then shoot us up with ECHINACEA. Coughing is now I can get myself get guys like Nah. I'll listen to you the fuck you know my dad Just because you speak English you speak good. Her doesn't mean you betterer Atkins in the coughing. Have like a a dumber more like like a simpleton vocabulary and the other like I like so articulate. Pika Chu is diverted averted folk. I dare say two words at most sentenced master. No no listen and yeah I can. I can coughing only obey one bad bitch and that's just the James whips out the there's just as bad POK mon just I bad masters Shit Damn. I love that I love it. Didn't really. They're acknowledging their own downfalls. They must have listened to and so they all group together and disagree. Like all right. We're not fighting we. Yeah why waste our energy so they settled. Ah Down. It startled campfire and a time out. Because he's being an asshole so they're all in different little fruits leaves and just having a little she'll time if adorable herbal loving picnic out screaming. Let me out I gotta get food or you stop being a Dick. He's ignoring. It's like all all right cool and then just eats like really close in front of them. I lost. He's such a savage and while there around the campfire here this rumbling and the ground shaking and they look over and you try and rival walking around. It's just like well fuck this. And they just all take off running and finally the introduction of Dina maxing. Oh my God I was just about to bring that up like is what would this be. The the the inspiration for this concept is just basically poke them on but bigger bigger so what everyone in the arena could see back got imagine being in the nose bleed sections of a stadium and they're fighting with an honest and just fuck me. Who is the thing? Come on there's so many buff pokemon on I could see give you much. Yeah I feel like one of the designers sitting at desks. And They had a Toilet Pee pee on their desk a toy Johnson on their desk and they're just like I can imagine this. This idea being pitched like all right. How about big POKEMON? Oh you mean like a new bigger book on no you don't unquote does is hurting existing Bergeman but we make them huge plan design work. We just make them it. Just large boys just circling big on the whiteboard over and over again. I think I think so. Yeah they start running from the right on to national gang that are running from giants. APP does escape from that and we Cutler Jesse James that are running from John Alturas. Everyone's having a good time getting that cardio and Jesse James Run into keep outside and knock themselves out of it because of the next day. So they've just been passed on this grass for hours again but we come back to the pokey gang who are eating at this. Little Food stands and slow there in like a little chef out the old talk Yawkey and Shit and just like what's happening happening Atkinson coughing or just crying. 'cause Bobo source suggested that they might have been abandoned like they were able to wrong. It's just real. It was a very and then it cuts to them all like rats around everyone in liberal sleeping together. Something that was just a dream. Boat like wasn't so everyone wakes up. And we see Jesse James Pass out from running signs still they wake up and then they run to the phone booth. They saw earlier and they call their boss who we don't know yet but it's a leader uh-huh team rockets. Giovanni if you play the Giovanni voice is distorted. Yeah this really crazy voice disorder which isn't necessary because we've never met Giovanni Amani up to this point so it's not like we recognize it anyway. It's not doctor claw from or Mr K.. Doctor Claw from Inspector Gadget. And it's just like this crazy voice changer and in our like hey boss. We're in trouble. But I are routine. And they do the whole T- rocket intro through the phone and they even make up a letter letter or out of the phone cord just like no no. I'm not dealing with this book. Hewitt hangs you call me collect you make me me pay for this call waste my time. No don't love your point fucking which I love. How little time bullshit Listen to the whole thing though. Yeah he said that he secretly loves it. That's what he that's why he waited for them to finish. He loves listening to it so they say like all right. Boss is going to help us new idea. We're just stay inside the phone booth and then we're going to pull ourselves in the phone booth with the phone cable to the phone company. 'cause so it's going to be running this phone line and as you know what that's clever like. That's not a bad idea. Especially if they think there's Gye pokemon out there so then we cut to everyone's looking for each other like different shots of a different dates looking for everyone and as Jesse James are pulling themselves with the phone booth they. CPU Chew and actually how. Now's our chance to jump. We got this topic to and they realized it was just far away and as it got closer gigantic JIM skills. That's not the biggest shoe. A God. An an icon good and we see ashes gang running from a giant chart and see the pokemon gang run into a giant the giant blast off in the distance. Okay Squirrel. You're you're related till we wanted to go along okay. How racist not all think words are related? He did my only brothers are the Squirrel Squirrel Squirrel squad brothers. My opinions my Bruce City Council to like the job last Lewis. He's just like hey. Bro Words up employees. They turned around. And just start shooting with water cannons item on Notre. No chill is absolutely nothing so as a running away hide and they see a giant Venus or walk by and they try it again where it's like table or you WanNa you wanNA give a shot. Both or just goes four Batman family. I'm an orphan. Sweet you draw alright right. But he's just Batman. I mean I love him. Though we get Jesse James by Jack Caputo tops at this point like this is a twenty seven or no absolutes seventeen. So they're whipping out a lot of big maple commodity and game. Paul come on really early. So this is a great teaser for the game and as a running away they run into a railroad cart because like oh great now we can get away from it and they take off the brakes and you're launching in the back towards the KUBOTA. They're just like a block but then there's a cable there's a keeble wrapped around the card for some reason and it gets is caught between the Cupola tops lights and trim and as they're flying back down the track traveler John Kapoor tops and does when we see gets. I'd like to ask the gang walking out some mountainside cliff for some reason now and they're just like Oh. Hey what's that big dust cloud and they see the caboose tops in the railcar. Say Oh there's GonNa be trouble right as they say that the cliff there on crumbles and they fall right into the cart with Jesse James and write as they do. They've run into the big issue again and I'm GonNa say peak cheaper now because it sounds like a big issue and I don't like that big peak I mean we. We don't know it's political. cleanings shouldn't be that big in that extremely me so now all the people are in the car. Yeah can't they lift up the break. That likes broke off when they released it and So the real court slide on the rails get to John pokemon being dragged behind it and as the going we see the Pokemon Gang Ping Choon them running from the giant evolutions Shinzo bomb blast leaves chart Venus or and they run along side the car energy. Oh everyone's caught up how convenient and if the but we can't the pokemon catches are just too far behind. Like how do we slow down. And then we see a just a big ASS loopy loop for a mine cart which makes zero sense in in any universe. It's silly so they go through the big loop-the-loop flip around and I guess that kills enough time for the game to run up to the car and catch up and they jump on and once everyone's in their Jesse James just sorta like narrating everything. I'm like. Well now what happens. Well the cables probably going to break and it does We're probably be launched into the air. And they do and then we're going to hit something. The ZAP does now when they fled their disasters realize like. ooh It's a machine. We didn't just kill legendary bird. This endangered specie. There's only one of its kind and ad then we're probably gonNA hit the water and they do and it's at this point after they hit the water that we see just going by just as Polka pokey islands on it and we hear a woman like on a loudspeaker giving torrance like all right. Everyone if you look down the right side of the book you'll see some giant. Don't worry though that are all machines. It's all uh-huh ruins is all distributed millions of dollars drain everything's ruins and that's what I get. Giovanni getting another call hearing about POLKA lands being destroyed. And he's he says I put millions into why you're era crime. Lord what is going to have one legitimate business that you can launder all the money through. I guess so I mean it makes sense but yeah so and then we just get to the next scene and it's gang running to a beach city so I said all worked out business. There were no consequences for leveling entire part of life to the beach. I'm Outta here. I'm go to Brazil Yeah Patrick how is your vacation. It was great I went to Disneyland. I fought all the president's residence uh-huh and then I went to the beach and went home. Also just such a wild idea for theme park of just like if you're not supposed to be around the Gye Pokemon if you're supposed to say in the BOOB. Why do they all have to be like they seem? They seem to be aware of their surroundings. When stuff changed it didn't they were on tracks and also completely hostile goers or is it supposed to be like zillow where they're supposed to find each other and that's like a show for the parliament because rats Jurassic Park created the things then it all went wrong we should have learned? I mean it seems to be an economy based on what is essentially dogfighting so one. That's a good point and then the episode ends with slow. Poke you know finishing his day. Efficient on on that little rock in the ocean lifts up his tail. and seeing. There's a big old clam monster on it. It's now he's pro. Yeah my favorite is we've seen any OB is glowing blinding light and the form changes and all this and this is is literally says slow poke when the tail stone the water listen up. It's like oh I guess. I'm a slow Bro. Now a single tier running down his cheek as he's like finally finally I'm a man to be by now. I can use to lake's four. This has a negative dilution. Yes it's Dover's walking walking. I Love Blade. It's a babe laid golden silver. We get the Kingston comes slow king and that's the only game that ever uses it and then he had a mega evolution is slow goes inside the shell goes around him upside down and again he becomes a big babe late. It's while Saddam. I I loved incredible. You know there's someone at the POKEMON company who was like all right. We can phase Lobo Consulting. No I refuse at any. He cost on keeping this dumb idiot in his game which would probably be. I'd be that person he's taking. I love him. There are other ping poke months no PINKUS. He's dumb as the last one all right. We the POLKA rap up. Oh I completely forgot to talk about the poker APP. I am so sorry because the show was on five days a week for four kids kids that are like hey. Let's do one hundred fifty in the Polka wrap in a segment of five so we ended up getting the exact same poker up. We got for the last episode episode as we did this because it was a ten of those later or no five later so convenient but he'll those appointing little louise's side but that's seventeen. Yeah so now jump on over to episode twenty seven. Let's talk about fashion So our gang is on scissors street. And it's a place Where all the latest pokemon fashion ashes and there are some POK Mon beauty parlours and they're there because brock wanted to go there because there are also POK mon breeders readers on Scissors Street and that's what brock wants to do? Yeah and they pass by a store that that hasn't are on it well. It's a salon and the advertisement is a coughing and check ins all dressed up and then inside the salon. It's called Salon Row K.. And surprise it's just seeing James Doing Pok Mon Fashion Holy Shit I just realize roquetas just rocket that said fancy realize target. Jai those are two different stores. We're going to exclusive club. I'm wondering about that. How many pretty successful businesses have Jesse James started as a disguise and then abandoned the media? Just retire I mean James's rich so he has all that investment capital from Daddy Thirst Daddy. I want to open another store. Names well this one stick. We'll see daddy at least for twenty two minutes. Are you ever GonNa come back and Mary. Just Jesse see bill no absolutely not Daddy So they're doing the POLKA fashion and the POKEMON that they're working on on. They see themselves in the mirror and they do not like it. The Russia was actually kind of cute. Though trio's ugly Shit Poor Doug Tria Korea so then meow is counting money and he's like they're spending. You're spending too much money on ads. We need so make revenue and it's just just like a weird part where they talk about money for like it goes on just a little too long. It was really strange talking about how to get their start up off the ground so they can immediately abandon it. Yeah and the misty. Like maybe I'll get in line And then Brooke Doc sees the store that he was looking for He's like nervous to go in and he doesn't want to open the door but then misty Nash. Just walk in there. Like what are you waiting for. I'm on Percy and there's there's a girl in there her name is suzy and she's massaging chancy Hansi and then the guy who it belongs to comes in and he's like where's my chancy. Oh you look beautiful. Chance he's is all shiny and sparkly and new Ireland. These throw away characters like we never sued. He was a good fellow. I love this guy And then they see a Vo pick sleeping on a chair he's very pretty boy And then misty and Nash go up to it and suzy's it's like oh Don't touch him though. Miss what in then picks them up Animals what I'm too busy touching animal animal. You just told me not to touch. And then he blasts her with fire because this particular picks does not like to be touched by strangers. Much much like a cat feel like most people don't like being touched by strangers. phileas common rule a speaker. You're actually when they're sleeping. He's never been to museum or Strip club. Look but don't touch your whole wow and then brock introduces introduces himself to Susie. And he's like all flustered because she's cute and also like the best breeder and He's like Dublin is words and ultimately he's like please be my teacher and he also says he introduces her to Asha musty of as the sensational susie of scissor shree. which is you know? Is the only reason. The localization team picked her name. Is Suzy just for that. Line career we gotta get one end for tomorrow on Alta Muscle. We gotta do some for Pokemon. So yeah he talks about her accolades and how well she does with her breathing. And Her vol- picks is like the perfect model of of of what she does And then they sit down and they have some tea together and she says that Peachy was really pretty. He has a shiny coat and She says Oh brocker you the one that prepares as food. And then they're like. Yeah he is. He's he's the Best Pokemon Cook. I Cook for Pokemon Shit. Yes and then there are some snacks for the POK. Mon Pichu is eating one. And then the Volpe's comes up and sniffs and then P Q feeds it one which is very cute. Good And Suzy surprise she's like Oh. Wow volpe's only eats the food I make for him. What did you make it brock? And he's like Yes yes I did. Oh yes mommy and then misty ask susie about this latest flashy poke him on fashion and she's like. Yeah but I don't really like it. Because it focuses on outside rather than the power of what's on the inside of your Pokemon And then Ashen misty. Get into an argument about that about what matters more misty decides to take side UK to the Salon. The end badly side deck is not he does not handle any situation. Well anything no. He just needs a confidence boost of a makeover. He's put some lipstick on that boy or punched in the head to unlock his psychic power to to the level of city open his third and then Susie says that ever since the Salon Open Open. She's been questioning techniques and then ash and Brocker know what you're doing is great. What's on the inside? Really is the most important important and that is a huge theme in this episode. Really don't stop talking. which is an important lesson? They're really just going at it But so they decide to give a lecture on Pokemon care to attract more customers and to do this she susie gives Piquiachu massage and while misty is at the salon. The team the team rocket salon. everybody leaves too suzy's store and she has ash demonstrate massaging Pika choose electric sax on his cheeks his sweet little cheeks. I like to call the backs. I mean trick sex the electric sex. She also emphasizes that communication between poke him on a master's very important especially when you're massaging electric sacks from saks. The little balls in it's stored in the stored in the cheeks back with team rocket. I started the baseball commit. But you got their weird Christie was usually blue back team rocket. They're working on a poor squirrel. That has a wig gone. I'm sorry interview. These great and all this squirrel is gorgeous. I have the portal with the human wig. I love it. It's such luscious hair. Roses painted on the Shell. I is cute if it was just the roses. It'd be like a door bubble So they only have one customer waiting and it's misty inside Iraq and she somehow misty doesn't recognize them But they recognize her and they give her a makeover instead of sitek chicks pre cute. She's in some fashion And then Seattle blows their cover because again missed. He does not recognize them as he's like. What are you guys doing? It's the classic Clark. Kent if yeah glasses and meow meow is like what are you doing you should be should be grilling her about peak at you. Whereas the Pika Chew and that's when their cover is blown because there's only one in the whole world? PT Eh. Oh note the music. That's playing in Jesse James's shop the exact same music that plays during the look at tongue mini any game in pokemon stadium for sixty four. That's lodge into my brain but yeah what a reach. Yeah but so misty needs help so sidewalk runs back too. Suzy's place to warn them about what's going on And then they all run to to the Salon and the susie yells at team rocket about pokemon beauty. And it's the beauty that inside that's inside that counts again Once more in the meows just tells them what the plan was for the Salon. Make money and steal rare pokomo which is not great business practice clientele no people notice. It's about the return customers. They can't return if you steal them exactly. And then they're like if you give us your P.. Shoe will give you misty. And then Asha brocker like no. Let's fight but what if what if no thanks And then team rocket a presses a button and there was a battle stage built in their salon DU their intro and Jesse dress in a very princely sleep outfit and she looks amazing. Big Revolutionary Girl Tuna Vibes tenor a Tunisia. ATTUNING attune UNIA. It's been a long day and then James's dressed as a princess subverting gender roles as they always have been pretty good for the nineties. Yeah yeah it. It's never like ha ha these are these are idiots who are addressing lake girls and guys but wrong. They're like yeah we just rock these looks we just happen to be evil. This is just fashion. Baby there is a one up super banned from the US. Yeah Yeah those weird one that that is there's too much. Td's not in my Christian dogfighting in uh of saying surrender now or prepare to fight. They say surrender your taster. Prepare to fight twist on the song and then Dan they're pokemon come out and they're all dressed up still peekapoos ready to fight. Because he's all refreshed from the size and then peak. Get you hit them with thunder thunder thunder shock. It was thunder. I told you I didn't really play the game doesn't have any damage just paralyzed stupid. Well God njit away. Wow show I mean I can go. You know. I didn't take on your episode. Thunder shock is actually it's like ineffective and it seems like it's because of their clothes. It's a little unclear. They don't really talk about it And then coughing hits Pichu Angie. Oh Dude Gio dude is also there. The dude he He hits him in the face a slow and then susie steps in with Vol- picks to finish the fight fight and they argue more about inside versus outside and Volpe's hits them with a fire spin and it super effective and they're blasting gough again and then I wrote I wrote down. The quote acute exterior hides the Polka months true strength and then get shown like all the people in the crowd are taking the makeup off of their poke him on taking. They're cute stuff. There's a Paris with a foreign king crowned and I loved regally Shit and Paris deserves a little attention before that the how sad we to roof ride. And then they're back at suzy as you shop. And she says that They're grateful to them for helping her gain confidence in her techniques and praises brock on his composure. Hosur in battle even though he didn't do anything he did a seismic tossed that didn't work and and then she makes the decision to just abandon her business and also go on her own pokemon journey but without her. Poke Amman Volpe fix this is when she decides to give her picks to brock because she noticed that he is the only person that Volpe has been comfortable with other within her and he's on his way to be in a great poke him on breeder and then we see everyone chasing team rocket out of town owned l.. Episode Twenty Seven. I'm looking up at suzy. Ever appears again in the show. Because it's just like you you can take care of my pokemon. I'll get back to one day. And then she just never comes back. She died two days later many abandoned. Poke Him I'm on in the show. The Squirrel squad. She fell once pit traps and just died in their exposure. Oh my God yeah the Skurdal squad Doug Doug and then forgot about it but now they're fighting fires they don't check them anymore but yeah we we. We got some selects but by this this is it hits as good as it used to. Yeah yeah there's some from the Jelly donuts. Just the nonsense of Jesse James Anxious Boring. I is fun. I was really smiling the whole time. I Love Jesse and James I love I love it all. I love the cute cute babies. I love the the villains knowing now. It's all good talk Koi. How're you feeling revisiting? This this classic pretty good. I can't I can't stop thinking about. Did you know that VOLPE initially had a pre evolutionary for no. Yes that's our lead. Yeah you're just a smaller recuiter volpe. Six they get cuter okay so like in Japanese of all picks and Nine tails is there. Names literally translated six tales and nine tails and there was another one called three tails off at three and it was just smaller Mahler and looked like a little baby and then the developers like Nah. Let's make an ice-cream pokemon instead how about literal keys literally. Let's throw some straight up garbage. Yeah how about a bag bag of trash instead. Pig Shop Jimmy more trash. There's there's one of those leaked spice. There's an evolutionary line. That was just abandon completely but it's like a little electric tiger and I will never forgive them for not giving me now. Tiger boy cute. It did make a tiger legendary though that was a elliott yeah walks. There's not the same. This one's like a perfect sphere. Leo Higher what else. Oh there's a pre evolutionary form for zoo matt in the League sprites. It's just a ball with a single tooth and ways. I love that it can't hurt. Anybody has no other. TV can't effectively bite anything. It used to super ineffective splash high. Well do we just going to be sure. Yeah we have to say. But of course I'm on-board baby spoke him on his book yet classic. Of course I did watch it as a kid. If I was a kid did I. If I could go back in time the first thing I would do would be watch more pokemon. So of course I'm on-board the good ship and son Muna Peres really good in a number wait. Animation storyline actually Windsor Pokemon. A league so sounds sounds like the movie. It's also on that flicks wink sponsor easy to Walk Daddy Net flicks give us that money. Giving the body lease he's will sell out good. Rod was a good way to top off the four kids Thaad. Yes I'm happy. We ended on a good note. We needed a ringer. Because Oh boy we've watched some garbage whole man this this marathon was a real gamble but thank you so much for joining US coy This good run fun time so yet get where. Where can people find you online Koi? Oh I'm I'm mostly just Dick around on twitter. I'm at Koi. Dow with three Os. That's at K H D a o o o those until you find it and after party is fresh fresh out at at this point right. Yeah it's out on on the EPA game store and it's on. ps four and xbox. Yes and it's coming to the switch in a couple months so if you're someone like switch should hold out for it or just by multiple copies. I Dunno whatever you want to do. I'm I'm not sure that that's fine. Your Dad when you when you're done with the new pokemon you can you can hop onto after party. It'll be the poke Amman's after party. Do Their it works. It's just it's just Mr Mom at the bar with a glass of Scotch is like He didn't do it anymore. We can't talk so he's just like Mr. My Mister Mind. If if you have a show now that we're out of four kids marathon where we're actually going to watch stuff you send us now. You did so yeah. You can send anime recommendations to are we there yet at gmail.com or reach out to us on social media at our Riveria on twitter and instagram. You can find me twitter and Instagram at Mr Patrick Dugan. You can find me on instagram. At Queen Period we Abhu and on twitter at Queen underscore we blue and queen underscore. We Abhu art can find me on twitter. ABT S Brendan. It stands for almost better than silence and thank you Camille Meal Rulli for artwork. And thank you to Louis Zong for the use of our theme song stories off the album beats. You can find all of Louise Music at Louise Dot Band Camp Dot Com. Thank you and next week. We're launching. Oh Yeah I get to pick. It's the first one read the first one of the four kids thing to pick. I picked something that sounds chill literally from the toy title. We're we're going to watch the first three episodes of laid back camp. ooh Nice Straight win streak vibe and all all all through camp yeah all right well. We'll join US next week as we learn to live with anime. The loss

Jesse James Pok Mon Brock SKURDAL squirrels Amman Volpe Patrick Dugan Nintendo officer Jenny James Indigo League Pika Chew Jesse Squirrel squad Susie Rodney dangerfield Giovanni Amani Rockets
ACS (Part 1): Brad Williams and Christie Bishop

The Adam Carolla Show

00:00 sec | 1 year ago

ACS (Part 1): Brad Williams and Christie Bishop

"Thanks for listening to the Adam Corolla show on podcast. One blinds galore, the first place, she go for custom window treatments online. We have them. Here. We have in the other warehouse in the edit bay the whole place blinds galore have it at my house, haven't my bedroom. Awesome. Blinds galore does one thing and they do it better than anyone. One hundred percent custom window treatments. Built your Zach measurements designer quality without the designer prices at beat the big box stores prices, and they have experienced, and they have experts, and they'll send you samples you get free expertise and free samples you get up to fifteen different color. So you pick out the color. That's perfect for you. Insulate your windows with their stylish cellular shades keeps the cold out the warm in and then vice versa. When. We get to the summer months. It's blinds galore. Right. Dawson galore makes it easy to get the custom blinds and change. You've always wanted in your home. Go check out blinds dot com, and let them know Adam sense. It's blinds dot com. From guerrilla one studios in Glendale, California. This is the Adam Corolla show that guest today Brad Williams with Gina grad on news, bald Bryan on sound effects and Christie Bishop gives out another commercial grade. And now. Professional podcasts on a closed course to not attempt. Adam corolla? Yeah. Get it. All. To get it on a choice to get on mandate. Get on thanks for listening. Thanks for sharing. I love hearing where you guys hear us. I love that gets me through my commute or tough day the office. Good day Gina grant. Ball. Brian short, man. Have the show brought to you by blinds? Galore dot com. Tara, Adam and from you flowers com slash Adam Castrol edge titanium strong for maximum performance. First super-quick, heavy birthday, Tina graph many others. Agree with me, and that moving on hope, you got the Carrero force. On top. Kidding, man and flowers. Sanely huge. That's a sorry. I cheat. Okay. God. Yeah. This is a day. Deep cut. But that is a rod ni dangerfield's wife. Ask bouquet on Rodney Dangerfield and remarried late in life and Rodney Dangerfield. You gotta get a new wife. He'd have now NSA success before fifty fifth birthday, you know. And now, then he became Rodney Dangerfield and he married. A hope you're sitting down much young. He sync up there. Yeah. Brian should've known. I know it usually goes that you should have heard the election. I should have dissipated. We're going with that one. So he this this once this old convenient Mary sis- younger blonde never have accepted rule, and she somehow n- the Vegas of my memories. I remember her being a business of a florist did over size roses. That's all. It's my I have to I've three Rodney Dangerfield recollections. There was his wife you can figure that one out max, Pat, Ronnie, dangerfield's wife, and like the flower oversight flower business, the other one was they had like a condo on will share. And I think they wanted a hot tub, and they craned it in and put out and how fast power move of biggest power move. Is. It was he didn't he? Was in it. That's a big move. But he was a diver you saw. Yeah. Cool. That the the crane company, obviously, it's a liability unless you have someone is certified Olympic ask the triple Lindy, right? Right. And so and the other part was his blonde wife who must still be around and have all the money was she in turn into giant flowers. Right gay picked the flowers giant defeat gyn. Yeah. Could not get those by the side of the freeway gorgeous. I I have a couple of pictures. I was surprised it's morning by my boyfriend and his son with. Yes. Because I'm nervous. Not Rodney bingen Heimer. Dangerfield. And it's it's wife. Cannell show point twenty minutes ago, we find anything about this lowers goes running on Iraq. He's never been married. Righty? Dangerfield wife, blonde, big stem roses. Sorry, go. So. My boyfriend son is all boy mostly and he picked up presents for me. And I opened them one by one this morning, and I sent Chris a couple of pictures, and if you have I he picked out traffic cone birthday candles for me like my NS omelette because he loves cars, and traffic and all things of construction. Then all of my presence. I have a picture of. Yeah. There you go. He picked out a sparkly red white and blue bow tie for me to wear because it's fancy. Yep. Two pairs of sunglasses a birthday button and car that says granddaughter your joy because at bird on it. So that was real nice. All this. He he's three and a half. So he's just coming online. Yeah. Thank you. These are unbelievable are unbelievable. And I gotta tell you ever paid. I'm going to deputise going to pull those out put water davick. I'm like one of those. I'm just a weirdo that way, which is the longer. They sit not submerged in water, and you shave an hour off of their shelf life, right? So beautiful. Congrats. And we'll you know, you're around in a year. I mean, that'd be dead. But obviously be here. Then then we'll do it again. They can't wait. I had this. I had a couple of thoughts. I was talking to more Garriga's about this earlier today. I don't know why this old school. There's this thing where you just wanna talk about old school stuff. But I feel like there's a bigger chasm between the kids today. I everyone will always say that throughout history and don't get me wrong. But I just mean certain universal truths that are now just essentially gone, which is the notion when your kid three cores of my life with search surrounded around the the notion in theory and activity of put it back put it back. Oh facing actually lines out. It's gone. And there was the what it went from. If somebody borrowed their dad's car or something if someone went out of town car after be put back in the garage. The way the dad had and you'd have to pull the seat to where your dad had the seat. There's liquor liquor bottle version of this too tire subplot affairs peeler. Yeah. Yeah. Because that car back exactly backwards. What it back? Yes. There was like, oh, he's got a penthouse in his chest of drawers, and at the friend, the lower drawers underneath the t shirts. And you you may go look at that Penn house, but you'd never just set it on top of the chess jersey put it back, and you'd make sure that it was facing the right direction in the corner. There is a food. There was anything. You would pinch any anything that was in a medicine cabinet anything that was in a pantry was all about putting it back back pain sticking. I could remember like taking my stepsisters car out for joyride and stuff and like trying to make sure the seat was exactly. Right. Even the windshield wipers, it started tourism or something I turn. On. But I had to make sure when I turn them off. They weren't like in the middle of the windshield. And they're back down. Just all that stuff. Just wiping the handle down with my shirt's sleeve pistol. Yes. You never just everything was just walked backwards. Wipe it down face the labels out. And yet to take the right amount of everything if you opened up a tree, and there was some Nacho cheese. Doritos you couldn't just polish. They'd be missing. You could take, you know, take tween nine thirteen to read us, but don't take half the bag. They're gonna know somebody got into that. And don't leave it Divet where you scoop smooth it a little bit. You know? So I can't tell take you think it's it's there's a possibility that Lynette would look in a pantry and go who ate all the Doritos. And then the answer be no one fucking knows. Nobody cares. Someone's assess the call grub and sell them to bring some Doritos over whoever would it's it's insane. But just that weird notion of gotta get the car back. Gotta get the porn back. Like, you're never gonna get the nuts. Back labels out a long. Process of putting everything back exactly how it was your footprint had two zero. Again, I come home. Now in my daughter's frame thing is roller skating through my house again. No. Laying on top of the back of the sofa. Glare cross back. Remember, the no fly. Remember three cores of things had to do with the way. You're sitting get gets it. Right. When you do get your put your feet on the ground up there for. Persia for this is new, but some of us had our grandparents had furniture. You could not sit on don't go in there. But that's a couch. What are you doing on it people people had like, I remember some people I knew who had money I had a girlfriend who lived in. Arcadia, and they had like what what appeared to be a mansion, but this one of those corny seventies eighties saying that had a bad bar fake fake stained glass over it really really crappy look in. But it was still like forty four hundred square feet and you want in that front door to front doors. Now, we had two front doors, but they were separate they're facing on these are two front doors next to each other overspent for me for me. So two front doors. Oh my God. You'd have no difficulty getting a sleeper sofa in and out of this place, and example, for example. But if you turn left when you walked in the entry hall you walked into the formal dining room and that carpet was right. Wabe would leave what brands and if you left what prince someone get yell that? You'd have to go back rake it like it was an infield of a dodger name. Yep. Russia as you back out hand. Hand. Coupling covering my tracks literally covering my tracks. Again, I come home. My my my kids friends are laying across the top of the sofa. The back like a hat was said laying across that with at Saka Doritos on the sofa eating it out of out of thing stomach when you more torito's insane fine. You to punch them Joan Dangerfield founded jungle roses known for their grapefruit-size flowers roses sounds like a dozen roses. Hundred and eighteen dollars dozen and the phone number was one eight hundred respect, but that's good. I think this is one of those jobs. You do when your husband super-rich can because she died, and I mean, he died, and she's I don't know how old now or what she's up to the exotic flower business remarried. That's kind of a weird one, Don Rickles. You got the you got. You got Rodney sloppy seconds. Which? Kind of a weird thing. 'cause like, it's it's Rodney Dangerfield that's kind of cool. So I was kind of a weird guy to had sex with your new new partner. Let's history mystery probably at the end he was on Viagra. I don't get no erect. That's a show everyone hollow. Get the big bucks. You don't have to say man, we get it. We heard the jail. Stupid. But I just thought it. All right, anyway, you have to tell us how old is workshop. Yeah. I would start off on what's in the news coming on the Muller port par facing congress. Oh, how about Rodney Dangerfield that guy? Just was passed a couple of few, you know, he left a gal behind much younger probably wanna have sex at the end, you know, marinate younger blind. You know, but it's probably difficult because sage and his health and everything like that. So you know, he was on some Cialis or blue or something that's what's in the news would be my first twenty years ago. How old was she sixty six he's a little property, but he's been gone for God. What's Ronnie been going one hundred now when he was he died in two thousand two I it's weird. Before he was eighty two in two thousand four right? Say two, and she was forty or for something fourteen years, whatever it is one hundred anyway, so he'll be missed. But not by me because I met him once it was a super dish love line. Yeah. It was on love line and famously he was supposed to after love line. They just come running up with a camera, and they had like three cards and you'd go. Hi, I'm Rodney Dangerfield watch me on love line tomorrow. And then they'd go one more, and they go watch me tonight on on love line. They get three those everyone in TV knows you have to if you watch thirty second. If you do Kimmel or you do did Leno back the day at the end of the show like where you're standing around with Leno and the band. The band just got done playing the musical act. I should say just got done playing. They deal quake quick thing. Like, hold the and then the guide run up and he'd go. That's listen the margarine Steve oh back to you. You know, the local news, whatever coming up next and give the names out of local whatever, and it's like that's part of the gig and Phillies gratin. He's like, no. I gotta go. Yeah. Just we're right here. Just doing. He's like, no I can't I'm running late. I never like, but we're just sitting here, and we just gotta just knocked it out. And he's like, no, I gotta get a haircut. I gotta get their precision timing. You think it works that way? Burbank. -fensive fantastic Sanford Brandi. Hey bucco. Three PM mean Streep three seven. Okay course in Provo. Lovely all before. Yes. Now that's ship me work over super cuts. Yeah. Not here. Sorry. Now. Look, you can either reschedule or wait for Sheki green to finish getting his haircut because he knows what three PM means. All right. So anyway, it's good was. It was. Illness where where we I had a thought. My thought was my thought of the day that I think is going to help and in all facets a life. And it's something I was drilling down on with Dr drew about. I'll tell you. What max patta? Why don't you get a clip of an crawls unprepared that deal in wack together? From where we we're in San Francisco. Yeah. This is. I'll use it to set up this thought, it's a little ninety second clip. Also tell you guys we're going to be doing this in brea may seventeenth eighteenth and Denver and Portland in West Palm Beach and all that although due West Palm Beach or is that a life? That's a life before that is. You're welcome to stand up. I'll pull your balls and then. Tonight. Right. Is that we Kimmel's tonight. Yes. All right. We should have that up there because can probably still get tickets for that link. Right. All right. So we'll play that little spot, and it will then launch me into my my poignant thought of the day. Speed speed. I listen, we make fun of speed owes like we make fun of fanny packs because they're gay but the fucking work, right? The Speedo still sort of weird and gay. But if you're European like if you've got that kind of accent like you've got to walk in here tonight in a Speedo, and we would've went like what the fuck. And if you're from Idaho, we would've just beat you by the dumpster, but you go. I have to be back in don't, you know, and we go cool fine. Speedo smart smart that he showed the sock in there. That's awesome. Also, I kind of missed all these belts. And all these guys are all getting in these weird like, we're skintight onesies. Now you ever see Mark Spitz? Mark Spitz is like this. He's wearing a fuck and red white and blue Speedo. He's got a six gold medals across his chest. Mark Spitz with such a bad ass swimmer. You know, all these other swimmers like shaving their bodies down and waxing themselves and putting fast-lane all over there. Onesie and everything Mark Spitz at a huge, seventy porn star mustache fucking chess full of fucking Jew. Pro. But you Russians. The weird English. Tokyo reference was there's a guy in the front row who is English guy who lived in Tokyo, and I was talking to them earlier. But just to catch you up. It's also it's such a winner thing like when you have this English accent. And you explain you work in Tokyo. Everybody just goes, oh, super super dropping of the earth genius, rich genius rich genius Ritchie. And he he's vague. He's vague about what he does. He does. Also, these guys too. I had a company I sold it. I just kind of hung out and traveled for a few years, I got bored. So I started a new company God love them. That's awesome. All right. My thought which is based on that is. Let's see it's got to versus get to and everybody should get that stuck in their craw. And I'm going to explain more about that in one second. I I wanna tell you about. Let's see mother's day. That's right. Oh, speaking of flowers are theme mother's day's coming up. Sunday may twelve and you can't go wrong with flowers from you. Flowers dot com has a fantastic deal right now for our listeners go to from you why? Oh, you from you flowers dot com slash get a dozen mix roses for just nineteen ninety nine. Rodney's wife would win over one hundred bucks for these things or running being. Really wanna make an impression you upgrade to to mix dozen roses, plus a free vase or vase heading on where you're from for just ten bucks. More. That's twenty nine ninety nine for twenty four roses and a free vase guaranteed freshness. On time mother's day delivery, JD power awarded their highest customer satisfaction online flower retailer in two thousand nineteen that's all that's saying a lot order today supplies. They're going to be limited. They're going to sell out fast. That is from you flowers dot com slash Ataman. Check it off your list, man. All right got through versus get too. So I was talking to Dr drew and tell them about traveling around New Year's resolution trying to do more stand up. And he said, well, how is it you go out and you do stand up on a Thursday night. And then you go out to cobb's on. A Friday night and do stand up or you go out the Sacramento, and you stand up on Friday night, whatever it is. And I said, well, obviously, there's benefits like you're working out. You're on your feet. You're you're not you're not getting covered with dust or ring rust, or whatever we're calling it. And you are you're you're working out ideas. But you're also just kinda up with the juices circulating and so on and so forth, which everyone understands everyone gets that facet of everything. It's no different than exercise. What's it like playing beach volleyball after not playing after leaving your bad for two years? Well, it's in better shape tan, but if you get around he started hitting it, and you move around a little then it's easier, and that's that's fine. Everyone understands that concept, but this concept is that plus which is got to versus kit too. Because. If you're going out in doing it for free. Now, the lines are getting blurred between get to and got to. I used to go out and go like, oh you want to do dinner this weekend. I go. No. I gotta go gotta go gotta go. We're going to Chicago. I gotta go. I gotta go. I got go there port. I got to got to got to and. And it was true. I I I had to do it. But in my mind, I gotta go. I can't do this. I got to do that. Do this thing. And I was turning what standing up on stage and drinking a beer and making people laugh and hanging out a green room and watching Mike August and never putting the cover back onto the ranch dipping sauce or the vegetables ever. Even though I would always dutifully cover them up. But he would always that. Simple pleasure. And I turn that into got. And and so what I what I started doing when I started going out in doing stand up for free. Now, it started into well is it get two or got to because I don't have to go out the day before Thursday night before I hit the road. But I am doing it. But I'm not getting paid. So those it blurs the line a little bit. And when you're driving to the airport to do two shows on a Friday night after a day of work. It sounds pretty taxing. And. It is. But it shifted like I was like driving to the airport thinking. Ooh, I get to have as much time. As I want doing doing my stand up at the beginning in a club that like keep it to twenty minutes. And we'll give you the light at eighteen or whatever that is. And they're not gonna throw chair at you go to twenty two minutes, but there's a little bit of you're on the clock. And there's there's other comedians waiting. You. Don't wanna just fill us up there and baba, blah. And now this packed house full of fans, and I get to do as much time as I one on my stand up that I've been working on. And I've switched it from got to to get to now it's never fully going to be get to go to magic mountain. But it it it does take it from the got to the get. And if you guys look if you have a job at a manure factory that involves a snow shovel. It's going to be hard to get you from get to God or got to get you. Gotta get the shoveling. Many jobs that you probably. And then now the problem is is everyone can convert a get to got to that one's easy. That one's easy. We're all very good at it. But let's see if you have a job that is somewhere in the vicinity of something. You would have thought about when you're in high school. You know, when I was thinking about jobs in high school. They ended the ended with the word, man. You know, they're going to be a fireman or do you want to be policeman illustrated book, you look at a picture, and there's a garbage man that could be a garbage, man. Yeah. So the fact that we're all doing this puts us in the get to round, but it's still easy to turn get into into a God. And I'm just saying anyone who's listening. Keep it your job, maybe working at a law firm as a clerk or something like that be glamorous involve being on stage or an audience or accolades or anything. But I still bet there's ways to get from got to get. Yeah. The job. Sure the entirety of the job and not be get too. But there's certainly aspects of it. It's like you always say about look, you're not in a cubicle you're out digging ditches, so you get to be in an air conditioned environment and comfortably working on your job. That's something. Oh for me. Just sitting as big deal get to and not having a foreman announced that he was going to get some one of us to quit by the end of the week. That was my greatest moment. I love good old Mike stra, Matt like I'm going to show hard on you guys. I'm gonna ride you so hard. I'm going to punish you so badly that one of you will quit. I it's such a marine. It's such a horrible impulse to have a bunch of broken down nineteen year olds or getting seven bucks an hour to dig ditches for fifty hours a week who clearly we're neglected by their parents and fell through the cracks of the system, the notion that you got to go down Israel were MS. We're here are we it's the middle of the summer. We all shovel their hands. Why what is that impulse? I look I'm do. She is the next guy. But my impulse was always if I was on the set or doing love line on MTV, or whatever I would be Dushi to the publicists and the producers, but I've never be Dushi to anyone who was running around on the set of craft service down punching the working people. These people are working now everyone on a construction site is working, but some guys are putting up crown molding and other guys are digging ditches. He's such a douche, so basic training for no reason. Oh, no. You should have done dead fingers. Look, I ran into his wife on the road, his ex wife, and she's she's cared a bunch of flowers force lawn. She's like boy can imagine working for that guys. Like, I couldn't imagine living with that guy. Mike stra Matt while he's looking that up. You know, you should have done Tilly now, obviously. But like over five ten fifteen years, he was he was basically threatening. Some some group doesn't whatever it was you go should've pulled a couple of bucks together. Each got one of your gut just one of your flunky, unemployed buddies and be like, hey, here's twenty bucks. We'll put into bucks, each whatever is you show up as soon as he gives one of he's going to quit get up and walk lights. I quit. You got twenty bucks. You gotta gotta quit. He now. Pas. Yeah. It sounds good. But there was only like four Jeff gained twenty bucks. Baltasar one of the guys and. Three Mexican guys into white guys. You know, which one is both is our Baltasar is under lease. What a confused like I'm gonna get one you to quit. That's it out here so long. I don't know. I don't know. Baltasar must be I don't know Hispanic. I guess it's not common. But one of the guys aims Baltasar. I don't know where where it comes from. Anyway, when you're talking about the got versus get to it always makes me think of program people in twelve step people say things like so if you're looking for a way to be of service, you know, come volunteer this week, and blah, blah, blah. And I've heard people say that I got the first my heard that I thought why would anyone want to look for a way to volunteer? I didn't understand what the concept was. And then when someone explained it to me, and like, of course, that is a privilege to get to be of service to other people. And I was like well, oh, of course. Yes. Of course, it makes sense. So that's such a great way to put it. If you're looking for a way to be of service. Here's a way to volunteer. Here's the thing to do. Here's the thing to do. And of course, it makes you feel better. Well in a world where everything is relative all the time where if you lost your cell phone or damage, your cell phone or left your house with. Out your cell phone. You would be devastated, and formerly that device didn't exist. Nobody had it. No one thought about it was just fine considering that's how we're wired. Then the pursuit of success and in riches and fame or or whatever that is air conditioning and wall to wall carpeting, and one hundred inch TV screen that's only going to beget more. They you know what? I may I may do a preemptive sniffer. Bold through another gauntlet. But think about think about just the short period of time we've been on the planet. You know, when I grew up we had a fourteen inch black and white zenith that was deeper than it was wide. And it was like, that's our TV shut. And then at some point. It was like big old Sony twenty seven inch, you know, weighed four hundred pounds like okay, the TV set. And then someone's like flat plasma forty two inch plasma T O ate it. They made it, but she quickly. It's like it's like you just got into the jacuzzi of life. And you're like, oh, boy, this really is tickling my feet, or this is this is hot or whatever. And then for you just sat in and then sit around and we're making any hotter. Like, it doesn't feels normal now whatever and then the forty two and then the fifty five and now I have a eighty inch TV, and I don't give a crap about it. It's it's just the TV that's in my house, and I don't give two shits about it. And everyone else lives in the house doesn't give three and a half shifts about their slightly lesser more than I am. It's a big nothing burger to everyone because you mmediately acclimate. And then you go to someone's house, and they have a hundred and twenty inch flat plasma, and you want to know what the problem is with our house. So that's our wiring. So unless. You do a thing where you go. I'm going to go to the shelter where they have thirteen inch TV and watch a little watch a little basketball NBA finals on that. You'll never reboot you don't get calibrate. And you're not calibrate calibrated to just keep going. That's our wiring. So go view it. I mean, this is also a little what Dr drew calls ordinary misery like just go. Go. Punish yourself? A little bitch. Go hit it. Go hit a little bit little too hot for hiked on the hike. Just just just push it a little bit cell stretcher comfort. Yeah. But think about the got to versus get to and giving the to to the get to now Kristie Bishop probably someone who does thinking they get to indeed way. See also strikes me someone who's like work is one of those things that you can kind of run from your whole life or you can dive into it like you're going through wave and burst out the other side of it. I. Coming. Now, she embraces those the waves of life the challenges the all the stuff that most of us at splashed only a wet like machine not to be too much of a Downer. But you guys got married at an incredibly challenging point in your life. Right. It was okay for her. I was telling me. You're saying it was like look this is all too much for me. I wish you the best. You know, she had that attitude, then there were definitely people who people in our lives, we knew and like who brought that up to where did it ever cross your mind? Why are you gonna stay with them? Obviously, so far so good. We'll see you tomorrow. We'll bring Christie, and we'll do commercial grade. She has thoughts about big fat guy on the beach interested about that. I'll tell you commercial sweetie about Castrol edge stronger. Under pressure engines can lose up to ten percent of performance due to friction Castrol edge with fluid. Titanium transforms under pressure to keep the metal parts from Robin, power and rubbing and all of that. Now, they say if you ain't rubbing you ain't race in. But this is internal inside the engine block. You don't want that three times three times stronger than leading full synthetic. It is Castrol edge everybody. Oh righty. Then again, we got Vegas tonight and come I'm dying to check out Kimmel's place. I'm also dined at checkout, the food it Kimmel's place, come out Harland Williams. It's gonna be with us. Not tackle bell materials out as we speak. Thank you very much at chassis, or I tunes Amazon or every get love it. If you watch it totally what you thought, and we'll take a quick break. We'll come back with the Christie, Bishop and commercial great. This Thursday night. The Adam Corolla show returns to the stage that the grand opening of Jimmy Kimmel's comedy club. Join the ace man ball, Brian Gina grad and the rest of the show at Jimmy Kimmel's comedy club this Thursday night. Get your tickets now at Adam dot com. Chrissy Bishop in studio. Great to see you announce your noon, exciting, title and job places. So I'm going back to work everybody. Right. Joining a an amazing company called Ataman, and I'm going to be there. You better be happy going back to work. It's an amazing company called Edelman their marketing agency on going to be an executive vice president of their brands. You are gay clock eight yes, I've been talking to them for. Once you get a cool office. I think so the the have more than that more importantly have a cool team is. Yeah. Right. But back. Furniture. What's going on with advertising because I'm one hand? It's it's you know, it's kind of the old school stuff has gone away or lessened in a certain degree. But the internet must just opened this whole thing up to these vast new horizons. I mean, there was a story weeks ago about Accenture typically like, you know, not an advertising company they bought a company called drug five, which is like one of the most aboard winning advertising agencies out there and the company that I'm working for Ataman started out as a PR company. Now, they're getting into fully integrated advertising and winning awards that other traditional agencies would win. So it's very incestuous and interesting the internet's one thing. But it's just everything. So fragmented like if you just doing one thing you're not gonna succeed you have to do all of it and do it. Well, I was everyone was sort of outraged over the I don't know what it was the DNA find your ancestry where the white guy was fleeing freeing a black woman. Dot com. And I thought I didn't I didn't hate it. But I realize you can't go. It's a third rail. Like, there's no good way of doing that. So it's kind of a why even why bother going down that road in this day and age don't you know, it came from Canada like and has to be well into tensions like. No, polite to like, let's look at the positive side of flavor. We're so so I wasn't all by it. I thought they were trying to make a positive statement. I just thought don't, you know, in this day that there's no version of this no matter how thoughtful you think you're paying com on the right side on the good side. I get all of it. And I don't care because I get it. But no one you're going to get you're going to get you know, that an arms about everything these days particularly race relations. So I mean when I saw miserable really by watched it. And I was just like what world did this even make it out of like a concept around into like an internal presentation. It's good without these two getting married and running away together in like her fling. Listen, it wasn't clear that she was a slave. But it was very very it was inference the elephant in the room that the the thing they obviously missed that for every mixed race birth that came out like this. They came out of the eighteen sixties or whatever. There were ten thousand that were product of rape simple rape in the back by by slave owner and slave is not consenting. Vast majority cases came up amongst the Canadian creative. Also had a nominally the good people of anomaly probably didn't go a mixed race. Couple sneaking have a life together rare. Except when I get it. It's like without this story like you wouldn't exist. Like the story would have fine. Okay. By the way, simple rape worst ingredient. Cocktail. Take a one ounce of vermouth reduce it down. Take some zest of lemon. I not crushed ice lewd it Jaeger simple ripe. Shia curved simple. Right. Who's the anyone listening at my new job? I had nothing to do with this. Simple, right. I don't know what you guys are making. Now, you can make your own simple rape at home jigger. Please. Reduce Brown sugar. All right. I thought we did what is how much. Writes rape. You've got. Leaving. Blasted negative one. Is one and a half ounces one and a half. One and a half. Stupid. The real one has the two sides to one we know. I used to be a bartender. All right backing groceries. Welcome to my home, dishwasher place. Now, let's get to she'll let because I saw you tweet about I can't even with an ad. I guess it was it was a woman who was very heavy set. And she was on the beach, and she was celebrating herself. I guess this is real when I woke up to it. That was the first thing I saw, and I was like this can't be real like this is this has to be fake. It is Gillette Venus. Yes. It's a a woman who now look there's a couple ways you can dress a big woman and their ways to do it like you'll see on, you know, let Ross dress you they have the plus size models in everything. But they're not showing a ton of skin. This is a lot of cotta cheese. Well, so the good and the bad of this is like what? So anyway, the headline reads are that the the caption thank you since its social media these guys so go out there and slay the day, and it's the photo. And it's like, yeah. Yeah. Strong woman whatever in glitter. Plus lasers. That's this. Woman's handle on Instagram. So she's an Instagram influence her. She's got like one point two million followers. This is her picture. So like this is not Gillette who styled at her style her at all. But she's like she's all about female apartment. Like, I get it. Her videos are wonderful. She works out a ton like she has a whole workout thing on her on her page. So she's getting an insane amount of flack for this. I understand. But like what the hell are you doing Gillette like you struck out with the first TV ad metoo? You completely shark out was so far like the exception to the rule like me to me to now this one like, okay, we're celebrating a city celebrating women like what are you trying to do like it's well intentioned, but it's terribly terribly strategized and executed. I mean, people are fat shaming the hell out of this woman. It's awful. Like do do. I agree with Wang that much. No, I don't. But some people just do. And she, you know, she might be healthy. She works out a ton. So have to go to the beach, you happy she wants to do. So I feel really bad about the way that she's getting attacked a g. Just don't know what the hell it says about Gillette and like PS they sell their Venus razors for more than they sell their their male razors. Tax. I'm kind of doing the math like I used to do with Dr drew where like all the people strung out on Vicadin that must be taken a hundred pills a day that must be good for the drug company. Right. He's like not because you're moving X amount of yet. And he used to take moving product. I'd take three and seven years when I have a root canal. They're taking one hundred and I felt the same way about Sharman and t- peeing the principal south. They gotta love it. And if you're Gillette, and you got women with this much volume a lot of razors. How many raise you going through well through to and I haven't gotten through my right leg. Yeah. A lot of that's a lot of ground cover there. There's a lot of square footage square insurance. Yes. And I feel really bad because I don't think we need another reason to bash women for their bodies like we do a good enough job of that at all just by ourselves. But like to figure out what you're trying to do. Like don't jump onto the bandwagon. Goes Silva extreme with it. And like what's next? What are they going to do next? Just stop for a second, and like pull it back and figure the hell out the thing that I was also interested in was the twins and the electric car and the whole sort of VW thing, right? Yeah. I got the answer. Wins on the electric Carvey. Those were twins are same person playing that whatever. And I wanna hear both. I have a question for you. I always think about actually I rarely ever think about it. But on the way, so VW has to make amends for their rigging. Yes. The diesel diesel gate, these okay? And so they have to give money to electric car. You know, the the board of electric cars to run commercials, blah, blah, blah, sort of it's it's it's a lot like the cigarette companies. Paying for commercials that are non anti-smoking hang up there since financial hail Marys fine. And so they're no VW's in there's a Chevy volt or Volta. Can't remember DWI in there? It's an eagle. So there is you just can't tell at all like at also the it's a Nash, I part of a national campaign by a company called or an association called electrify America them wholly owned subsidiary of Volkswagen group of America. Volkswagen say. Created in two thousand sixteen but like you said about this investment, it's a ten year two billion dollar investment on zero emission vehicle technology and awareness. This was the first one. There was a veto Gulf a Honda clarity. By the way. Never heard of that carton. Nissan leaf beat up BMW, I three and Hundai on in addition to the in the commercial. I'm talking about. I think it was just the Chevy that was in the one we drilled down this show. It's only when you can see really okay like the logo. I don't even know there's I'm trying to think of the other cars that are it's towards the end when they all kind of go away. So the question then is if it's VW in VW's Pang, and they have to have an electric car in a world where you do TV shows, and they put kaffirs tape over everything all the time you wear Nikes on a TV show. There's put tape over. And I was. Look so stupid. That's what they do. Yeah. You go out and shoot a car. That's the Ford logo just bummed gaffer's tape over. That's how they do it. So if I'm VW, and I'm shooting a commercial, and I need electric car, and I can see the Chevy bowtie the front grille. Why not some silver gaffer's tape just over that being forced to know? I have no idea to be honest with you. I don't know the way that that's the way that that strategy is come to life here. All the other cars. Yeah. I don't know why it might be because that's the car that has the most awareness. They might have done the research. Like, okay. This has the highest sales has the highest awareness amongst the general population. So since this is a message about electric cars, and the whole message is basically like if you're not driving electric car you're living in the past like the Flintstones. So I could see them using that as a flagship because people have bought it in there ware of it. My in my world where every time you bust out a camera. Somebody bus out the gaffer's tape. I don't Chevy's Mike competition. Yeah. Why just put one three inch piece of photon? Now, they can't because they're. Promoting legit cars and how today's commercial for Volkswagen commercial for electric car. Yes. It is cars, but not the Chevy volt. I mean, that's the highest selling electric car. So using that as like, basically, the primary vehicle than to have a halo effect on the rest of it and have a positive effect on. This is somebody enforcing that. Probably they probably who knows the Chevy volt versus best interest to do vocal. Frankly, the list, I just read like we all like, what are those cars? Yeah. They're not gonna let them do Volkswagen or they're not gonna let them highlight. It all right. Yeah. I'm just saying if the if I were there, and I was for Volkswagen. I go I'm not advertising, we'll have an electric car. But I don't want people to know what it is. So the gambler state over the. Then somebody probably told them know from the research perspective, guaranteed. It's because it's the best selling one with the highest awareness. If you're trying to have a halo effect on positive imagery and sentiment being on earth for like electric cars, then then you showed that the volt. I still don't understand because Christie. No, no, I get the halo fach. But only one people know of like if you put a different logo, and the people don't it's like Flintstones and Jetsons people are not going to understand that it's electric because you've never seen like an Ionic before. I think the only difference in our way of thinking is is if it's in forced by some sanctioning body than. Yeah. Can't if it's left up to me Volkswagen. I will. This is not a commercial for or by Volkswagen commercial for this third party now, which is electric cars for America, a wholly owned subsidiary of Volkswagen group of what if this some home cooking. They're not allowed to you know, what I mean. I'm sure just like the cigarette companies or whatever it is. When you you you have your own company, but it's regulated cannot do not putting ads on cancer. Let's do one more. What do you got? So let's talk about the discover twins. Oh, yes. Decree. I have an answer. So I interviewed a gentleman named Ross lacy yesterday who owns Ross lacy casting. And he's very prominent casting director in LA for my podcast and like three minutes into the conversation. We're like oh this ad this ad. And I was like you've done discoveries. Like, oh, yeah. I did the twins. I was like, well what's up pull over pull, the Catholic? And I'm like, so wait, we gotta we gotta get to the bottom of this. And I'm like, what is the strategy. Like, tell me everything. And he's like, oh, yeah. Well, we're in our eleventh round of casting and their eleventh round of the campaign. Meaning there's multiple ads in each round. So probably like thirty ads in and from the get-go. He swears the brief was to get to people who look identical but are not twins. They're not related so they cast in New York, Chicago and very laborious, and we were sitting in the room that they cast in and we will find them. Fly them together put them in this little room with the two desks, and they're they're separated. Then we have them talk to each other and make sure like the voices sound similar that they can reactive charisma, but why why not just the same person? He's like because we. Be having this conversation. And I was like my vindicated wanted cultural awareness cultural currency because you're like, what are you doing? Why are you actually putting two different people instead of the same person? And he's like they wanna conversation people. They're working smarter monitor for Ryan like Christie was very excited permission yesterday after the interview, and I said, I guarantee out of gene, we're going to have the same reaction as me and having same reactions, which is that may have been may have been their strategy. This whole like oh have conversation, reverse engineering, a disaster, reverse engineering, a poor concept, which is oh people are confused the intentional along. No. It was not you're not trying to confuse people. Well, you guys have talked about nine eleven flying. Ninety. We're talking about avocado. Christie. That's like saying if I cheated on you, and you got set me or yelling like, hey, look at the spark it's causing relationship. No problem with I thirty seconds into a conversation about how excited I got the answer. And all of a sudden crowd point with. I was like this is why people say that you do this because you're prepping from my point I'm excited, and I got the answer. But I guarantee that that guy didn't mean that's like you weren't in the room shot up. I well, you're both experts in certain fields. Everything in the universe to hand. Time. So this guy, Christine your opinion, or at least what this guy was saying. But he just that was their plan and the plan was to get people talking about it. And maybe debating and doing exactly what we were doing. Yes. And because it's been I guess I mean using air quotes well received and still constantly debated eleven runs later. I mean, it's working for them. It's they've increased their brand awareness like people are talking about it people know it's from discovers from an advertising perspective, it's working, but why go to the trouble of finding two random d'appel gang. I mean, they're either the same person or they're not just get twins. We don't care about that. I was more blown away with the fact that you actually can find like in the, gene pool. There's there's another Gina out there and other Chris, I'm curious. Yeah. And that's the whole point because he's like, well, I mean, if it was the same person, we would not be talking about like, that's the end of the story. I'm like, no, you're right. That's that's not very compelling or exciting. Wow. Yeah. I feel defeated. Somehow. We all know the names for. Title. Normally Chrissy gives a grade. But I'm going to nice for because we're just kind of breaking down the game film on this particular commercial grade, but satisfying to know interesting to get a peek behind that curtain that she talked to the guy cast commercial guy the guy. That's also it's it's always a little disappointing. Whatever the answer is. Because you think there's an answer. And they're they're oftentimes isn't an answer. I found this in many facets of life where you just go way. Do we find out this? I mean, look no further than the mullahs report. We're going to get this and never gonna feel this way about it. And it's always like you venture really get it. Feel. Every time with you. Adam is just to disappoint you. I'm. Default setting. No. But how many times have you said to somebody? But why why did you do this or how come you? Did it that way? What was the thinking behind? And it's like, I don't know. That's why we did. Why did you your daughter Christie and your son Chris? That's right. True story, it my brother, and I have the same name. All I never really put that together. There's not a good answer. The name did the IRS. The time. Yes, it's fun. All right. Well, mom and dad do a little commercial great for gyco. And then roll bring Brad Williams and everyone's got the to do list. How about you add save hundreds of dollars any car insurance? You don't have to go anywhere. Just go to Geico dot com. Fifteen minutes, you could be saving fifteen percent or more on your auto insurance. But that extra money in your pocket and get yourself eighty inch plasma TV at geiko guy could come Christie. Well, of course, commercial grade the podcast available on apple podcasts and the Twitter and the tweets that I was rated pardon my crumbs, which I enjoy quite a bit as well. So check out the Instagram at pardon my crumbs as well commercial grade as well Brad Williams out there. We'll bring him in right after this. Hi fashion outline. Hi, we're hosting a spring picnic and the weather looks great. But don't we need stylish new genes now? Get old navy old navy. Yep. Right now Jean shorts and tees up to fifty percent off up to fifty percent off our fashion forecast is looking up. Sure is professor tendon with distress styles in lighter washes, there's one hundred six washes to choose from dean started just fifteen bucks for adults ten bucks for kids. But the picnic this weekend, we need them. Now. Just by line pick up in store for free today. Free pickup and type for our picnic get up to fifty percent off teeth. Now, it'll navy dot com. Four twenty seven five five. Oh showdown over the Muller investigation. I'm Jacky Quin within AP news minute. Attorney general William bar will not testify before a house committee Thursday a scheduled with the dispute over the format triggering a showdown with committee chairman congressman Gerald dad ler on whether bar should step aside. I think he's going to have to answer for testifying untruthfully in both the Senate and the house, and that's certainly when the attorney general had a contentious hearing today with senators over the Muller finding to congress the special counsel will likely be summoned to testify an emotional vigil tonight on the campus of the university of North Carolina, Charlotte, thousands of students attended honoring the two students killed yesterday. One being called a hero for tackling the gunman more severe weather's on tap for parts of Oklahoma and Texas yesterday two people died in separate incidents in storms and flooding. I'm Jacky Quin.

Rodney Dangerfield Christie Bishop Volkswagen Jimmy Kimmel Castrol Adam Brad Williams Dr drew Mark Spitz Chevy Rodney Adam corolla Mary Gina grant Chris Chrissy Bishop rape
Monday Morning Podcast 3-11-19

Monday Morning Podcast

1:01:25 hr | 1 year ago

Monday Morning Podcast 3-11-19

"Hey, what's going on its Bill Byrne? It's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday. She'll eleventh two thousand and nineteen what's going on. How I. Oh, how you doing? I'm gonna great move. Despite the fact that I missed that fucking the first Moto GP race of the of the year, I found out directtv isn't doesn't have it on fucking television anymore out here, which was very disappointing to me, you know, I couldn't find it. I was scampering. I woke up in a sweat go. Wait a minute. Wait does f one start today? I thought today. Gonna miss it. Right. Freaking out OCD fucking twenty God damn racists. God forbid, you miss one. So I look up f one that doesn't start till next week down in Australia. Okay. I already have that recorded that's easy because that got picked up by ESPN. So I'm like all right where the Foxton motor GP. I have direct TV. All right. I'm not trying to talk down to all you people. That's right. I can still afford to pay for cable. That's how fucking hard. I am crushing. Out here in these streets. How you fucking cord cutters? Just back and yourself into a fucking entertainment corner. Just sitting there with your apps, and you little Netflix fuck and subscription. That's your world. What are you gonna do watch every episode narcos and then some stupid documentary to try impress your friends? You what you you need you need those seven hundred fucking channels that they have three hundred of which are radio stations. What do you walk away from Molyneux's? What are you afraid of? They're all proud of it too. Because when I couldn't find it on direct TV I went onto the Twitter and very nicely. Dare. I say eloquently, I just put out to the Twitter sphere. I said, hey, does anybody know what channel the Moto GPA is on on on directtv? And. Oh, did that come out of the woodwork? Jesus christ. You would've thought I put a fucking piece of cheese down in a bun all the fucking Rach came running out. Right. The rats even eat cheese. Don't they kind of eat anything? You don't me? Like if you just put like a severed finger in a mouse trap wouldn't fuck and Radha virtually come up and try and eat the fucking thing. I mean, they don't give a shit, right? Like that relative that always shows up to the event never brings anything and just hovers, right? Hovers around the fucking table doesn't use that fucking spoon. To scoop as is reach it in with his fuck and Mets. That's what rats. That's a rat and social circle anyways. Plowing ahead. So I put it out there nicely. Okay. I like to feel like, you know, being a man in my fifties. Now that I am I am refined. I am a man of the world, right? I drive a four door sedan. I still pay for cable. Okay. So I'm like this close to buy a pair of loafers. Do you understand stay like that? That is like how a stab wished. I am as an adult. So I put it out there nicely. Does anybody know what channel the Moto GP races on? On direct TV all these fucking cuts come out of the woodwork. First of all, you know journal sixty nine it got it. Are you going to try that? Right. Then they start doing this what burst and they start speaking Twitter speak. I didn't know that direct TV was still a thing. Oh, wow. Man. You like so cool the way you the way you get your entertainment. Jesus christ. You wouldn't do it? If thought I showed up with a fucking. I don't know the wrong pair sneakers on what was in fifth grade. The fact that actually suggests that I had no idea there was so much. Shame and still haven't directtv. I pay like two hundred bucks a month for cable. Swear to God. What do you think? I went from one fuck in podcast link the two I gotta pay for my direct TV. I do you know somebody told me one time he goes to pay way too much money. Just can't become over there. Now yell at him. I'll cut it in half. Because all these fucking people accord, cutting and shit. You can you know, I have all sports packages. Oh, yeah. I'm talking shit here people. Okay. I pay for direct TV I have all four sports packages. All right. And I missed most the games. Okay. You wanna talk about taking hundreds of just throwing them into a fire a lightness Garth. That's how Roland. Anyway. So it turns out that direct TV no longer. Carries motor GP, which in my world is the best fucking racing out there as far as if you wanna see excitement if you want passing. Okay, you fucking NASCAR guys down there with your fuck and stale that also doubles as a smoker during the tailgate you wanna get drunk. You stay on this side. If you want some buffalo, but you get on Exide, right? You guys wanna see fucking excitement you wanna see passing and that type of shit. You wanna see you want to see a wreck watch a fucking guy high side on a motorcycle going like fucking two hundred miles an hour. Like once every three racist. This just something that would make evil knievel be like Jesus fucking crowds that guy still alive. Which point you said, it's called an airbag evil. You know, they watched you a little jump there at at fuck could savers who am I e evil can even would laugh at that bullshit. The little light bikes in their fucking airbags. You know? You know? He went out there wearing a fucking payroll leather under ruse and gun on a fucking chopper. You could fuck it by down at the local store. Can bike wait more than my goddamn head. Anyway. You want to watch this motor GP so fucking ended up going online. Everybody's like why don't you watch it on read it for free, whatever. So I didn't I go to Mojo GP their website. I sign up for the season hundred and thirty nine bucks. Right. More money more money. Just fucking is flying the window. Right. So. I signed up for it. And then I'm such an old guy. I couldn't figure out where to watch it. And I finally figured it out after the race was over. You've gotta click on this like four lines on the side. And one of them says live when you click on that that's the fucking race. By the time. I figured that out. You know, it's countdown like fucking, you know, nine thousand hours until the next goddamn race. So I missed it. And like all MotoGP races. That sound like it was exciting as hell and it came right down to the end and to video. So Ma has like he did last year by like the length of his bike. And I don't know. I'm hoping if anybody watches it on motor GP site, if they replay it I can't even find a fucking highlight of it. But anyways, so all you read next down there like you stock car racing. Just it's twenty-something laps. It'll go by in two seconds. And I know it's a bunch of owners out there on their little motive scooters. I ain't nobody named kale or hairy. Or dale. You know, there's a Mark that's kind of you know, Andres Davinci. Oh, so hor, hey, Lorenzo, close the fuck and border. I'd like to build a wall around that fucking racetracks with God like to do jump over that mother fucker. Anyways. I might seem a little like my energy is a little higher little more giddy. It's because. I doing shit. I got a special in the can man and. I'm just I haven't done stand up since I said good night on the second show. And tonight, I'm actually going down to the to the comedy store there. It's close to the public. It's just for comics only, and it's the memorial for Brody Stevens, which I think is going to be. I think it's going to be great. It's going to be sad. But I really think it's like he's such an uplifting guy. And there was so much to learn from him that I really looking forward to going down there and celebrating that guy's life and the work that he that he did down at the comedy store one of the legends one of the legends. There's a place out front where they put all the all the names of the people that really built that place and kept it going. I hope they move his name up there. That's what I'm going to suggest. So anyway. All I did. I. Took my daughter down to the park. You know, we went on the fucking all the rides and all that stuff just said like the best time hanging out with her and. We've said we'd watched the Bruins. We watch the Celtics while I watch the Bruins. I watched three Bruins games as fucking weekend. The Panthers Ottawa which both ended great. And then Pittsburgh. I had a feeling they were going to get us. I mean, we literally one like eighteen or nineteen in a row undefeated. We were like we like fifteen and four I think so at some point someone who's going to have to stop us. The penguins always play as tough as much as it sucked that the streak ended. It was our longest point streak since I guess the early forties. But. I got a tight some Sidney Crosby pass in the second period. That anybody see that cheese is Christ. I mean, that's one of those things you watch. It's just like what what do we need robots for like, that's like the kind of thing like a robot skating that fast trying to get around defense. And then he has another guy streaking down on the outside of another. Defenseman. And then you got the goalie who could poke check the pass away. He put it the only place where it could fuck and be like Todd Ray fuck it pass to the clerk of the Enzo. Right on the tape Bank bag in the back of the fucking. It was just one of those. It's one of those things even though the other team did it you can't even get mad. You just like Jay's Christ that was fucking. It was a thing of beauty. So I don't have another fucking gig other than one quick benefit New York that I'm doing on April. Second garden of dreams. MSG in the theater where Eddie Murphy did raw. I always think about that. When I when I go down and do the show that that that this is where he did that special and I saw him on that tour. What used to be called great woods Mansfield, Massachusetts with the weather girls opening up. I for the life of me cannot find any record of that date when it happened. I think I finally found it when you when are you fucking millennial nerds find that? All right. It was like eighty five or nineteen eighty six great would suggest opened Mansfield Massachusetts. And that summer I saw I saw Rodney Dangerfield and this was post back to school. He was that movie hit and he was on this huge tour. And then I saw him in that a couple of weeks later. I saw Eddie Murphy. And I remember that that really was something that stuck with me. I was like eighteen years old. And. I remember when I went to see dangerfield's watching him and just looking around the crowd. And it didn't dawn on me. That was an all white crowd. Because I, you know, I'm white just like this is what the world looks like to me at that point my life. You know, living in the suburbs of Boston Massachusetts was just a bunch of white people. So it didn't really dawned on me that was an all white crowd. I remember looking around thinking, man. This guy's make everybody laugh. He's killing this mazing. Right. And then a couple of weeks later. I saw Eddie Murphy and the crowd was mixed member that stuck with me. I was like this. But this guy this guy's making everybody laugh. I had launched seats for that. I had seats for Dangerfield. So I actually saw him in. It kills me that I didn't try and pony up some more money back then, but I didn't have any money to not sit in in fucking field. I mean, I didn't really technically see him. I was just watching him on the monitors. But he was wearing that purple. Mariachi suit that he wore. So anyways, fuck of my talking about here. How the hell did I get onto that? I don't know. I watched the Celtics I the Lakers and at the risk of sounding like an old, man. Just I fucking hate NBA hoop now. You know? It's just it's fuck up and down the fuck and cord everybody launching a three there's nobody underneath you know, the other teams on a ten. Oh run. Yeah. Just keep launching threes. There's no feeding the big man down low anymore. Not nobody can stand in the fuck and paint. You know? I don't know. I I don't know what the fuck is going on with the Celtics. I haven't watched too much, but I watched a bunch the last couple years, and I can tell you this. We had fucking Jae Crowder and Kelly Olympic and everybody was fucking listening to Brad Stevens. We were a tougher team to beat. We didn't have the level of talent. But we were tougher team to beat in this whole fucking new era. And you hear the announcers just like, you know, they condone the behavior that people get so good that they don't have to listen to the coach anymore, and I'm not just picking on the Celtics like that's like a round the fuck and league. And I don't know. You know, he's going to have to get his touches fucking touches. They're going out here to win the fucking game. Drives me we have this. Unbelievable chance right now. With the talent talent that we have we should be able to the very least scare the Golden State Warriors. I know we'd beat him the other day in regular, but that doesn't mean shit. It's one game regular season. Like those guys are the fucking champs there in the middle of fucking dynasty. And they're going to have an entirely different energy. When you meet them in the finals. All right as opposed to fuck in one game out of eighty or whatever that you happen to catch him on a fuck and Wednesday night, and you beat them. We have this great opportunity to win another one while the Lakers are fucking rebuilding. And I love everybody's I can panic mode. Like Magic Johnson those guys doing exactly what the fuck. They said they were going to do we brought in LeBron? Okay. This is a two year plan like the fan base is this so fucking impatient. Now, like a two year plan is taken too long. So it's literally you bring in fucking LeBron the first year, and then he's going to attract all of this free agent ALP. And then they're all going to go out there and pylon because everyone wants to be part of the Lakers fucking. Great history, and they wanna fuck models and famous women. You know, that's the fucking thing that they have over the Celtics. They got the weather and they got the pussy. We just can't fuck and compete. You know, you wanna go racist city to racist city where right there, we got you eyeballed eyeball. You want? Go championships. We got two more than they do unless you count that one. That they count. But they have the weather, and they have the pussy and that that right fucking there. You know what? I mean, the fuck you going to do with how do you? How do you beat that? Location location location. How many titles do you think that the fucking? Lakers would have had if they stayed in Minneapolis. Okay. And they had the exact same ownership. I'm asking can they still attract the level of talent that they attracted? Being out there in Hollywood. Now of a sudden you're in the frozen tundra. Of minneapolis. Minnesota right. You got fuck in farm fed chicks wherein their overalls coming in from Duluth, right? You got some hayseeds making the trek in from fucking the Dakotas. I mean, I just don't see it. I just don't I just don't think there's enough pussy, and you don't have the fucking weather. Whether in pussy have have have caused more goddamn athletes to make stupid fucking moves to jump out of the NFL and join the fucking world football league. Well money to money whether in pussy, the trifecta. So I don't know. I'm just hoping people listen to Brad Stevens. Just listen to what the fuck. This guy says play like a God damn team. Fuck your own stats and just go out there and get it done. And let's fuck and win another one before the lake is a comic because the Lakers, a comet they're always coming. Okay. It's almost like a rule. They can only suck for like five fucking years before they're going to re and you know, they're going their whole fucking their whole fucking history is free agents free agents free right down to Kobe Bryant who was a fucking Charlotte one. But what kills me look at that Antonio Brown? Like, yeah. You go into the bills. I'm not playing for them. They get the out of the league. I don't understand the bills just made a move to get one of the top receivers in the league. But he doesn't like where the fuck they are. So he's not gonna fucking go. I mean, I don't know what happened to parody in the fucking league. I'd listen I'm all for like players not getting fucked over by ownership. But they're at the point now where they have too much power. You know, kind of like where the unions were when I was a kid which caused all these fucking corporations would be like, all right? Well, we'll just going to move the corporation out of this fucking country. Go back to sweatshop labor. You know? And I I don't mind you unions. I'm not saying don't ever fucking union. But whose kid in most people don't handle power? Well, right. And they became too Grady to county too much leaning on the mop, and then the fucking rich guys will have a fucking out here. I gotta tell you something. All of what I've just said here. I've I don't think I've ever really read on it just this is all me just pasting together conversations, I've heard throughout my life. Okay. Like, I've said before if you want. Clear and accurate information. You listen to the Joe Rogan podcast, by the way. I have to give that guy of a shoutout, right? As far as like what that guy has done with his have you been looking at the fucking guests. That guy's getting. He's like. Elon Musk and the Dr Phil and the David Lee Roth, and then like some scientists that ever even heard of who then blows my mind about like some sort of like, I don't know, I know some scientific shit. I don't fucking too stupid understand it. But like that guy is. Like, I don't know. I don't know what school where this podcasting world goes. But like at this point. If you do if you're a guest on his show, you get more heat than if you do like a fucking legendary talk show. It's it's unbelievable. What that guy is has done. I was just thinking the other day. I put the fuck guest that I see I think a David Lee Roth. I think it was just the the variety of guests. They again, Dr Phil that's fucking huge. I mean that is like a big mainstream old school guests. I'm going to go do the talk show circuit. I'm gonna fucking go do terrestrial radio, and all that you get that fucking guy mean that I thought that that was a big, you know, I don't know. That's a big moment. That's that's right up there. You know when Maron had Obama on. I think when they look back at like literally podcasts come from. What was some of the watershed mo-? It's like I would say. I don't know. Stamps dot com starting to advertise, and then it goes over on Mark Marins. And then it's Joe Rogan's numbers and his wide variety of I mean, he had like Elon Musk on his show. The guy took a hit of a joint and it affected his stock prices. That's fucking amazing. Anyways. But meanwhile, here I sit in my fucking sweatpants talking to myself stubborn stubborn German Irish guy just going to do it this way. I don't want to talk to people, man. Now fucking with you. I if you've noticed when I do interviews. I'm a lot of times of too busy thinking about what the fuck I want to say or somebody said something and I drift off. And then it becomes like that Chris Farley thing where I'm just fucking grabbing the side of my pants going men when you did this. That was awesome. All right. So oh, Billy nobles bag. Okay. One hundred and seven fucking days. And I went to the gym yesterday for the first time in three years. I did a dip testing out my shoulders. Fortunately, where I go to the gym. They have like this the dip machine you can actually remove the dip bar and adjusted to your height. So I have it just way down near the floor. Where my arms are actually straight win. I'm holding onto it. And then I just sort of went up on my toes support, my weight with my arms and went up on my toes. Like, Michael Jackson. You know? And you know, minus that documentary whatever the fuck is going on with that. And which is low and myself down in every every time I felt a little bit stronger. And then yesterday, I was like I think I can do one. I did one felt all right? And then I kinda did three in a row, and I was just like why did I just do that? Because I'm finding what the rotator cuff. It's is it rotator a rotor cuff rotator cuff rotor cuff. Jesus christ. I've had this injury for three fucking years. And I don't it's one. You know, I just had these words that I don't really know how to say. So I just say them fast. People don't notice rotator cuff. Yeah. Oh, and I I just think is it rotator Cup a rotator cuff. I don't know what the fuck is. If you still listening. God bless you. That's all I can say so anyways, I was able to do that. And then they have one of those. Those those pull up machines that you can be on your knees with like, the weight and all that stuff. So I did like two or three of those. And now it's fucking AllAire says, I'm kind of feeling weird feeling in my other shoulder because I think this one got worn out because of the other one and. I think I've finally I'm just going to go get an MRI on both of my shoulders figure out what the fuck is going on. And then I might do a Rogan, but Rogan's, but telling me to do is go fuck fucking check out this guy that does the stem cell thing. And they just shoot it in there. And all of a sudden you like a fucking X men. I think I might do that. You know? I think I deserve that. I I didn't get the hair plugs. Right. I'm not doing both talks. I'm aging naturally. You know? I don't think say the wrong with rebuilding the engine in my fuck and shoulders. Jeez. My kids screaming. But anyways, I haven't been drinking haven't really been smoking. And. I don't know. I'm actually calling a fucking therapist today to fund because I've been saying on my on stage, I've been working on my anger, but I've been kind of doing it on my own. I've finally going to get some help here and. I've been doing this joke in my accent. Like if I just didn't have a temper like is far as wife's always trying to say. In a nice way tries this always trying to help you become a better person. Like, I think if I got rid of my temper, she would be out of suggestions. You know? Because other than my temper. I mean, I'm fucking crushing. Do you understand that guys? Do you understand that? I am a man. That can still afford to pay for direct directtv. Nine hundred channels three hundred fifty of which are radio stations. I listen to those. You know? I'll fucking I'll pay for that direct TV subscription. And then I'll order you have see fight and a sports package. I don't give a fuck. I'll fuck off. I'm fucking stare at at three hundred dollar Bill pay it just like that. I'm sorry. I'm doing this. I just was so shamed for still paying for fucking cable. And I I didn't I didn't know that. I'm gonna fuck it doing this shit where everything's like. I like it. All right there fucking TV. I watched this on my laptop. I watched this on my phone. I got this thing on my fucking pad Bill. They're all the same technology. You can watch your many where I I don't want to figure. I don't want to figure it out used to just fucking three fucking channels, boo. Boo. Doodoo? Ooh. You knew all the fucking socks making. The Wayne you world today who can turn the world with her smile. Who can take her hair enough and warm some cock-up there been Minneapolis. 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I'm not gonna be able to get to where the fuck I'm supposed to be. Anyways, we plow forward here. Okay. Creepy Lennon mannequin. All right. Couple of weeks ago. I was in Liverpool. And I went down to this this. Oh, it says ready a magical Beatles museum. Okay. This. I actually I was making fun of that fucking John Lennon statue, we'll if you missed the episode. You literally the one of the first things you see, and it's like the white suit. Like, oh, fuck is that the white suit? Why would that be out here in the open where anybody could just take it you walk up? You realize it isn't the white suit. You realize it doesn't look like fuck, and John Lennon and all it's got this awful beard like tape to the thing's face. I mean, it just it just looks like a rip off. I mean, they might as well ahead of fuck to head goats standing out there or something. So I made fun of. So anyways, it says hi Bill, I work at the magical Beatles museum and parentheses. I like most of the staff agree with you, the mannequin should be thrown in the river. Merce mercy. Okay. The guys from cheap trick founded weird as well. All right. So that's a major fuck and band with. I believe that bands in the rock and Roll Hall of fame, and they are looking at it. Like, dude what the fuck. It's unfortunate you and your pal decided not to come in as the mannequin certainly does not represent. What is inside? The museum is on three floors. In his filled with three hundred and counting, genuine Beatles. Artifacts from one thousand nine hundred fifty nine to one thousand nine hundred seventy see now, this is making me wish I went in there, you gotta get rid of that fucking mannequin. These include the metals John Lennon war on the sergeant pepper cover while George Harrison's future Rama guitar. I know what that is the spotlight's from Abbey Road studios. Ringo's star snare drum Jesus seeds from Shea Stadium and the cello from the blue Jay way, video etc. Etc. Etc. The owner of the museum also the guy responsible for the creepy. Manikin is. Rogue Aspen Nali best. I couldn't tell if that was an affliction or a name a name. Okay. He's the son of Neil Aspinall e. Beatles Roti and head of apple records. He's also brother of Pete best, original, Beatles drummer, and is a great guy. Next time. You're a Liverpool come in. And we'll give you and your pals slash family of free tour. All the best Bill. Fuck that dude. I'm gonna pay I'm gonna pay. Although I would ask them it does peak it upset that he started a fucking museum to the band that fired him fart is brother. It's got to be kind of weird, right? I don't know. I'm sure shift Pete best is over it at this point. Right. I have is there any other? You know, that's another thing. Too on Twitter. I'm an old, man. I'm still on Twitter. Right. I'm still on the Twitter. Some they had this this hashtag going around that said. Not popular opinions and people would say like, I don't know pick. Somebody like, I don't think it. Dell has a good voice, you know, stupid shit. Like, nobody said that by the way. I'm just happy. I noticed their name. I was calling her Atalay for a long fuck at time. But somebody wrote the Beatles are overrated. That's another one. That's a big one when Molyneux's appear edgy. They go there overrated. Oh, are they? Okay. Okay. Well, maybe if you read up on the history at some fucking point on she's like a phone call hand a second. All right. Is it thing about that? I understand if the Beatles, you're young, and the Beatles music doesn't move you. Because I mean, it's music from literally fifty fucking years ago at this point that's the end of their career to and then the other stuff is coming up on sixty years. Okay. So in defense, you guys I understand that. If you don't like it or does but they're not overrated. I mean, they just they influenced an entire generation. Of of bands to get started. They made the whole fucking thing possible. And because of them you're listening to the music that you're listening to today, they are in undeniable part of music history. But I would never be this old guy going like, you know, if you told me that music sucks. I'm not going to argue that that's just like I mean, if I fucking grew up now, I would like some of their songs, even I remember in the eighties like liking them in my teacher being like going, dude. You don't get it. You don't get how fucking huge it was when a Beatles album came out. It's like the thal the fucking world stopped for younger people than you bought it and people do it. I got the new Beatles album. Everybody came over and fucking listen to it. I mean, I wasn't even part of that. So, but as far as like like verbally hates the Beatles. And he's just like yellow submarine Bill yet. Hello subject. Everybody's got a bad fucking joke in their act come on. Anyways. I whatever I I get it. I get it. It's too much time has passed. I've heard I've heard younger comics talk about some big comics that way and not get like what the big deal is. But what happens is is the further. Like looking Beethoven. Can you? Fuck it imagine when that ship I came out. Like it just fucking sitting there. You gotta goddamn boil the size of my foot on the side of fucking head. You're fighting off typhoid yellow fee. Whatever the fuck goddamn plague. And also this guy just shows up with one hundred dollars friends. He added. Like do what the fuck? You know? And now, you're just sitting there eating a subway sandwich in an elevator and in the backgrounds going, but at the, but at the just it just doesn't have the same fucking impact. But it doesn't mean the dudes overrated. Does it fucking? Anyway, moving ahead here or if you look at if you look at what is the the salt? If watched sultry do you watch some of the people dancing from way, fucking back. Then there's a lot of them that I've compared today standards. I'm not talking about the legendary dances just people on the dance floor when I watched because he loves that show, and I'll be just watching. I just laughed going. Like, you know, there's a lot of people on this show that are dancing at a level that awful white people dance at today like the bar just keeps getting raised off of the work. So if you go back the hardest thing to do when you go back in history is to block out what has happened since. Then and try to put it into historical perspective, which is practically impossible. It's like going back and looking at John United's how he threw for over forty thousand yards in his career and like the next closest guy had half as much as that. But now I like the way the rules have changed like a fucking God damn backup quarterback will throw for thirty thousand in his career. So it doesn't seem like a big deal. So I don't know. I'm just defending the Beatles. That's all now. I feel bad that I trust this fucking museum. And I judged by that goddamn mannequin. I think the whole purpose. All that was me just realizing that I'm a bit of a haze a bit of a count. There is as a bit of a. Cheesy cheesy babies. Dear Billy badge have you seen? These pussies throwing cheese onto their kids faces. I saw one of them. It's just. The fucking desperation for people to get views. On the internet to the plummet. Look, I'm a performer. I have a desperation for it. I get it on some level. But when you start like the Montevideo's, I just see parents with like their kids. Right. And they're starting to fall, and they don't do anything. They just film it. So they can laugh, and they just like let their kid get hurt is, you know, the real ones like you can tell it wasn't set up is because raise the kid starts to fall. Like that you see the fucking phone flies out of frame, and you actually miss the kid fallen down. You can tell the parent lunch and tried to save the person. But yeah, I don't get it. Anyways. Sicom the person said how much do you hate yourself that you'd throw cheese on a baby's face? Just imagine what type of memory is sublimely stored where a baby sees a camera and then something hit their face. I'd arrest all these asshole parents and throw firehose water in at their faces. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if it does like psychological damage to the baby if you can even fuck and remember it like some day. It's going to be in Philly, and they'll hey, you wanna get a cheese steak because like fucking starts slamming the sandwich and do its face. I don't know that it does that there is just the thing where when you are you become a parent, you sound like defenseless and helpless. You kid is. I'm not advocating being a helicopter parent. I'm not saying that but. This just something about filming it. Like, it's the kid obviously doesn't enjoy it. Obviously startles the kid, and the fact that you're putting your own fucking adult needs ahead of that. I mean, I all of that that whole category is giving you kid a stupid fucking name like coathanger or some dumb Hollywood celebrity fucking name or. Putting your fucking political agenda like your kid is gonna live your political agenda. I'm raising my kid gender-neutral. And then all of a sudden, you kiss your son as to where a fucking dress. Just so you can show off how fucking progressive you are rather than asking the kid if he just wants a football. Instead, you know what I mean like your going to make that decision. I think all of that stuff is. I don't know what I'm not a psychologist. I it's not how I would do it. You know, I think you should if you kid starts to fall you should try to catch your kid. I think if this cheese you should hand it to your child if your kid wants to eat it. They eat it. If they don't that you finish it get a few more pounds like a dead, right? I don't know. And I I also just like if you kid fucks up, and then you put it on the internet. It's just like it exists forever. And kids are already made you're literally giving like. Ammunition. Somebody showed me this video this woman or kid was being a class clown dancing at school, and she gave him the option. She says I'm either going to give you the belt or you can dance. So the kid is crying because he's scared and he's sitting there doing this half as like dancing while he's crying and everybody thinks it's funny. It's like this fucking kid has to go to school not to mention. You shoulda hit a kid with a belt? There's like so many fucking things that are wrong with it. I don't know. So yeah, I don't. I don't like. And I think, you know, your instincts that you're that mad that you could feel the anger that you have towards it. Yeah. Like, you shouldn't do that. And I imagine with your level of anger like some shit was done to you. As was done to me. And I think you go one or two ways either repeated slash try to take it to the next level or. You just go back to like, I remember what that felt like I'm not doing that. Why would I do that? But you know, there's a lot of morons that. You don't have to be smart to know how to fuck. That's the thing if they just made it like something like like if it was as difficult is is getting a degree in something. I think the world would be a better place, but anybody can be like my dick standard up. I want to dig it in their next thing. You know, you have a fucking kid you throw in cheese at it. And you're filming it. I don't I it's I wouldn't do it. We'll see we'll see what the fallout is. But my kids not going to be part of that fucking experiment. All right Premier League. Soccer soccer is in quotes. So I'm magin. This is fucking somebody who doesn't live in the US. Hey, Billy ball breaker. I've been listening for a long time and really enjoy your podcast especially during football season. As I find your analysis is put more in layman's terms for us Brits being a fellow patriot fan. Nice here. Also gets me shit as most people follow the Seahawks. Wasn't that interesting? If you don't mind right back in let me know, why did they follow the Seahawks? Is it because it's always cloudy over there. And they have the same kind of weather in Britain as they do in Seattle. That's really interesting. I've enjoyed your recent ramblings about the Premier League and Liverpool's battle with Manchester this year. So I thought I'd share a few facts you may enjoy and help you understand more Liverpool were actually the more successful team in history with eighteen league titles. Oh, yeah. I heard about this. This is like before the Premier League existed. It's almost like pre Super Bowl era. They had five Europe aka so eighteen league titles five European titles in a bunch of other cups until recently when their biggest rivals, Manchester United overtook them and have twenty titles, but only three European titles. So that's basically the Celtics and Lakers of Premier League football. Given your gripe about the Steelers I thought you'd be interested to know that all eighteen of Liverpool's titles were before the Premier League era, but are still very much counted here as it should be. Yes, it should there. Ricky pedia page is very interesting as they have also faced tragedies along with other clubs and still cake out on top never heard that expression. Unless you that's a typo. Secondly, Mant, man city are only recently a good team as ten years ago they were about. They were. I think he missed a word here as ten years ago, they were about over by Arab. I think they were bought out is what he wanted Arab billionaires. And if basically play paid extraordinary amounts of money for the best players and are still not quite good enough to win all the cups. See this is this is what you need to get into it. It's already a beautiful game. And now I need is to the back story in the drama. So I think that's really interesting that man city always sudden they have all this money. Which who gives a fuck 'cause you know, before then everyone was probably going to Man United or Liverpool. If they wanted to win a title now here they come out of nowhere. I like it. It's good. You guys all got money. The Boston Red Sox Liverpool. God knows they got fucking more money than God. What about Man United? Did. They got a bunch of money. But that legacy I feel like they need to do something soon or all of a sudden it starts to fade a little bit. Like the Michigan wolverines like thank God. They got what's his face there? Captain comeback to save any even though he hasn't been know-how state yet Harbaugh save that fucking program because you can only be bad for so long. We're all this. If you suck for kids in recruits entire life. They don't give a shit that becomes beetle ever stuff. Like. Yeah. Whatever that's yellow submarine football. I don't give a fuck about it. And they're going to end up the Oregon came out of nowhere. Because all of a sudden, they started having these cool uniforms started winning games. Abbott on a total tangent here. So let's Thirdly going on what you said about the offsides rule and the defending player slowing down they can do this. But if the attacking player is behind them when the ball is played. There's still onside and can score way. How does that work? The attacking player is behind them. When the ball is played. What does that mean? He ran past him with the ball. He can't go pass the last Fender without the ball. Right. So the attacker must time their run with the other players making the pass and the defending players must do the same. But also be aware that if they get a lie see what you're saying. So like if he's like parallel. Two. Or is it perpendicular parallel to the defenseman? And somebody kicks the ball past defenseman. He can take off as the balls kit. And then he won't he'll still be on side. I get that. All right. That's a little more. Okay. So it's sort of like a moving blue line. I guess I really appreciate you taking the time to explain this to me though. So let me read that against slowly when the ball is played that means kicked, I guess, then they are still on the outside and could score. So the way where the fuck with Thirdly going on what you said about the offsides rule the defending player slowing down they can do this. But if the attacking player is behind them when the ball is played meaning kicked than they are still on and could scores. So the attacker must time their run. With their other player. I liked that. There's a finesse to that. I have to respect making the pass. Do you have to respect it? You fucking arrogant, whatever I'm trying to be nicer and the defending players must do the same. But also be aware that if they get. If they get wrong they have to chase back and stop the goal. There are also other factors such as the other player isn't involved in the play. He is an offside and can stand anywhere. All right apologies for the length. Naaman? You actually cleared it up a little bit more still don't think one hundred percent understand it because I don't know how far away you have to be from the play, and you can still be on side. Hope you find this interesting, and please do a show in either Belfast or Dublin so I can go. Thanks and go fuck yourself. I was on Dublin last June. I have met a Belfast in a little bit. But I have to tell you how excited the tours. I've done this year through Europe been incredible. And I got one more that starts in Iceland. The end of April and. It's I don't know. It's just incredible. The people showing up the venues I get to play too. Yeah. I don't know. I'm still kind of blown away by that. So I'm looking forward to it. And I still have not been down to Australia. I keep saying something always ends up coming up. I got some acting work at push some dates, but after I do my next year on the next one. I do I have to go back to Australia because I haven't been there in a couple of years. All right now. I just take the specialists, and I got to build the fucking our backup again. And I can't go over there when it's week. I gotta make sure you know, because those ozzy's fucking people don't screw around, right? So I to make sure it's where needs to be. But I will figure all this out. All right. All right. Bye neural all beats B. I N U A R A L beats dear Bill have you heard of binary? I'll beats they're a great alternative to silent meditation and have the same benefits. All you need is a nice pair of headphones and YouTube on your phone just wanted to let you know because I'm also an angry sometimes. I found these and they really help with every negative emotion there even a few. There are even a few that apparently help with migraines. Check them out. Thanks for the left. Is this a real thing? It's this thing. Let me see me go. Let me let me let me let me let me look this up here. Be I n U A R A L for the people looking up to beats. Right. All right. This is for meditation his three hours and fifteen minutes. Let's we'll little listen to a little bit of this. Vegetarians LV. We'll eat French fries. Delta. Here we go. Here is some by neural beats. Sounds like a horror movie. All right. Can get into that startup. Little scary started off, I'm not gonna do a little. Speaking scary moves if if you see Jordan Peele, the trailer, I know movie. That movie. Looked so scary almost angry at because I'm gonna go see. I saw that all my God. And I was like to fuck that movie. Fuck that I'm gonna go see, but she's Christ. Oh my God. I fucking hate scary movies. But I love George, so I'm gonna go see that. I also love. The last one did so, but like this one looks like it's just full on fucking horror and. I don't eat that. But I'm gonna go. See it. All right. Boyfriend's family is silent during dinner, we should go. See it me. And then we'll come on the podcast and talk about like, oh my God. I love that. I love the scared, and I'll be fucking. Pissed that I went through that shit. You know, I told you what I saw when I saw the Blair witch. I had set at the laugh factory. And I went to the movie the midnight showing by myself, and then I walked down to the parking garage. By myself to the car just totally freaked off like Josh. I. I I'm not one of those people that can just sit there be like this is the movie I fucking by in. And it scares the shit out of me. All right. Boyfriend's family is silent during dinner. Okay. Let's see. What do we do with this one? Dear bill. I need some advice about a guy. I've been seeing who is great. But his family are kind of strange. They are lovely and quite nice. But they are incredibly awkward went together as a family. It's not that they say or do where things that we basically sit in silence when we're together when I first met him when I first met them. Jesus christ. I feel like I should be playing that meditation music fucking years. I read this. There's nobody there stirring coffee. Slowly, are they or t whatever it was when I first met them. I thought that they must have just came from a funeral because we went out for lunch. And it was eerily silent I was trying to be nice, and that's few question. But I was just getting one word answers. I asked my boyfriend about this. And he had no idea what I was talking about even started to get a bit defensive. All right. Well, there you go. That's just how they are. We've been dating about six months, and I dread seeing that because it feels like I'm being tortured in and under threat of speaking. My boyfriend is completely oblivious to it and love seeing his family, which is crazy weird because I would say he is reasonably outgoing and fun. When we go out with a group of friends that is what's really fucking weird. So I stopped seeing him or do you think? You missed a word you'd think would be some good techniques for dealing with them. Please. Give me some advice. You're single. You're not married. So this is all about you. All right. You you just have to have to figure out do. I love this guy. You haven't even said you loved him. My end of this person enough to put up with this like these people you have a kid with this guy. These fucking non talk and mother fuckers coming over the house. All right. It seems like you're early on. We like should I stop seeing this guy should maybe. It all depends on how much she liked the guy. That's so it's so weird that there. It's not weird that they're like that. And it's not weird that he's oblivious because your family just seems like family, you grew up, but the fact. That. He loves seeing them. That's what's weird to me. Like if they just like a not close cold family that barely talks. That's usually would mean that I say once every year year and a half I come around during the holidays, and then that's it. But the fact that he goes there all the time to sit there and not say anything to them. I don't know it starts making me wonder if they're like fucking aliens or something their communicating through the center of their foreheads or some shit. Yeah. That's definitely strange. And the fact that you're so uncomfortable that now you're thinking, maybe there's some good techniques that you're going to go in there. And Dr Phil and fixed the whole fucking family in one segment, it's not going to happen. So I think you need to. You gotta make tough choice. They're all right me. The let this great guy go and try to find another great guy you sound like you're still young still drafted in the first couple rounds. So there's plenty of good talent left out there. Maybe you could have more of a normal family. But that is or. You just learn to deal with their creepy horror show fucking vibe. But. I don't know what good techniques you're gonna use the fix that. Especially when you brought it up to he had no idea that you were talking about and was like defensive about it. So. So there is that anyways. I'm gonna try that that fucking horror music chanting shit. Sorry. You your I think I would actually like this better than. I have meditation happen. It's just this. This guy just keeps talking throughout being like Hello again. Welcome to another beautiful day with an opportunity to clear your mind at Tate. I'd like you to find a comfortable chair. And just sit in. The chair. Up against your body. Are there places that it's touching you too much? Desert. He'll just right. Fuck that shit. It's like, oh my God. To shut the fuck up. All right. Just tell me to breathe just shut up please for the love of God shut up. So I think I would rather rather listen that guy add rather listen to this. I don't mean in this. So fucking such a creepy. Goddamn way. Maybe I need to listen to this shit. So I can go see Jordan peels fucking movie and not be overly freaked out traumatized by. How great is it that guy's making movies? Every once in a while somebody fucking like that comes along. It's just awesome. It's awesome. If you love movies. It's fucking awesome. All right. That is the that is the podcast, ladies, gentlemen. I'll check in on you on Thursday. Go Bruins, go Celtics. Anybody knows how if I can watch a replay of the Moto GP race. I would love to watch it Senate to my Twitter account. Please. Let me know. I would love to see it. All right. That's it. Go fuck yourselves and I'll see on Thursday.

Lakers Liverpool Bill Byrne Celtics Twitter Minneapolis directtv Joe Rogan Australia US rotator cuff Beatles Brad Stevens Molyneux Europe Pete best football Rodney Dangerfield
EPISODE #028: Hackers! Yes, that's right, Tom & Manda delve into the deep dark web of hacker movies! There's no CTRL+ESC from this one!

The Deep Dive Podcast

41:50 min | 1 year ago

EPISODE #028: Hackers! Yes, that's right, Tom & Manda delve into the deep dark web of hacker movies! There's no CTRL+ESC from this one!

"Shall we say a vein to love to about their new nuclear. It's a good game chefs <music>. I'm it to you from an undisclosed location. Thousands of fathoms see this is the deep jive podcast. All i had one thirty station <music>. Hello divers welcome yet again to the deep dive podcast the only podcast they can save you up to fifteen percent on your car insurance no that let's car insurance yeah exactly. I'm tom feeney writer for wing shot movie magazine available liberal and amazon dot com and with me is manda highland hi. I'm the co host here. She is the co host dinosaur expert here the only only dinosaur expert here in the county yeah you know the <hes> the county they emailed me and said hey we need to know the specific dinosaur your gal and i replied with roar that was it. It was super mega. That's actually pretty good. I would have just replied with the work. You're dying a shower honest or oh. I get it they were. They were planted in the ground by the devil to confuse us. Whoa oh yeah well how people do believe that you know. There's no limit to what people believe. Even if we think that there is a limit like you know like a limit of logical <music> it goes beyond that no yeah. It's it's ridiculous. That's ridiculous sometimes oh well but in any event <hes> let's get to today's topic showing now computers have been part of our lives for at least oh last seven years so i'm not good at math <hes> now. I remember my first computer. Do you remember yours no. Yes i do what was it <hes> it was it was definitely a mac and it was one of the imax if you remember in the education occasion max and they had <hes> different colors so what my school district was that you could put a deposit on a mac and then it was kinda like yours. You rented in <hes> in at the end of the year. The people could buy it from you so my parents bought me a blue one. No turquoise turquoise. I did actually had one of the original max. What's the <hes> the blue ones. I think i still have in the garage. Summer doesn't work probably but yeah yeah. Probably i've also seen people turn them into aquariums which i have seen that too. I remember when i opened up apple loops. Though that was pretty cool yes in highschool nice. That's pretty cool so my first computer and this was back in nineteen eighty one so it took up the entirety of room. Yes it was it was one of the unix <hes> <hes> from ibm. Yeah i did a lot of punch cards. <hes> actually mine was a commodore vic twenty with a whopping four k. <hes> around so and i had an expansion module two and it had a cassette tape drive nice and actual audio cassette tape drive yeah. You know it's funny. I was at work and i had the pleasure of seeing an much older mac. It was a performance series hundred. Oh my goodness. I had the hard drive out to make sure that we could safely. Remove the data and let me tell you. It wasn't easy nor did it. Look we expected it to yeah <hes> <hes> my first mac was performed performa five fifty. Oh wow yeah back in the mid nineties. <hes> mysteriously back in the mid ninety might perform. I i loved that was my first. My i loved it. It was such an awesome kid. Be robust machine. It really was and it served me for good longtime so i had that for like five or six years. There's wow and it was a great machine. I loved it. <hes> i stuck with. I stuck with it too because everybody else that i knew was switch into windows ninety five and i was like nope. I am not doing that. I'm loyalist to be fair x. P. is probably the best o._s. Out there for windows <hes> and then when they got into ninety five. I was like it's okay but where's my rollercoaster tycoon yeah they. I think they released. The guy's name is chris. Columbus guy who makes rollercoaster tycoon i think he released the second version on ninety five in that's the expansion where you could have like different types of food stalls <hes> so not just like hamburgers and dogs but you could get like french fries and like ice cream one time and you can still draw people in the late that you made. Oh boy that that's my memory of childhood so nice man movies anyway okay so the reason that we're having this discussion you probably already there is a point podcast off by. Is that our topic today hackers offers. That's right those those fun. Loving rascals like to spend their free time disrupting our digital infrastructure and frightening the elderly as you know they do because everything that they own has been hacked been hacked. Get some stories for you boy. Don't we <hes> yeah. It seems like once you once you hit a certain you know certain age bracket. That's it for you. I think the irony there is that most people who do that or the people who do hit that bracket and start to you think oh. I'm being watched. Don't realize that you know what your age bracket where they don't really care anymore. <hes> might be true. Take your social security and we don't care at all about so. We're not looking. Let you through your phone or your t._v. Or but hackers are real thing and honestly so much has happened. I mean at least in my generation. That's been huge huge. I mean what about the whole wikileaks thing. Oh yeah i mean i think most kids in my journey. She would know at least heard of wikileaks but <hes> <hes> i mean this kind of stuff like espionage goes back. Oh yeah lots. I mean we're talking like i couldn't even think of examples. I've read about in like where one history and stuff and one of the major problems identity for example yeah and as big a problem as that is for individuals imagine if you have multiple personality disorder. How many identities can you get stolen from you. That's such a worry. It's not right. It's not really at all. I mean that's a problem thought you were going to go with like imagine if you're a country but you know it makes makes sense that you went with like the the split movie just because i figure if you wanted more than one identity that's a real issue right so yeah but anyway hacker's hacker movies. I want to hear your first pigmented what he got for us. Well my first. One is a slasher film right. Had what no. I'm just kidding out my domain. I think it'd be surprised with some of my choices okay but no my first one <hes> oh i can't just i think i can describe it with the word tragic so that's where we're going right. It's called twenty-three came out in one thousand nine. Hundred eighty is a german <hes> film <hes> but i i find english dubbed version. <hes> director by hans christian schmid schmid <hes> starring august deal. He is <hes> pretty famously known for a couple of german women historical period drama type things but he's he's pretty famous. Who's always end well so okay basic premise here it's nine hundred eighty s cold war era a germany right <hes> by the way i should mention this is based on a true story. Okay <hes> there's a guy he's young. He's like nineteen twenty that something like that and he's part of like this like cool hacker group and he's not necessarily into like let's steal the government's secrets or whatever but you know he him and his friends <unk> are i would say they're more legitimate than someone who occasionally practices hacking into your email account so he called carl <hes> he also so has fascination with the number twenty three hence the title twenty-three <hes>. I don't know if you've ever heard of it but there's a thing called the twenty-three a 'nigma or the twenty-three phenomenon was there. Jim carey movie. The movie's called the number twenty three. Honestly whatever i'm researching this they get confused kind of frustrating because movie was silly <hes> but no it's basically the people find significance in the number twenty. Three <hes> like the world is made up of five to streak was five like some weird phenomenon at that but ah in real real talk here. I think you're always gonna find some valid truth. If you look hard enough for it yeah so like if i wanted to find significance in that number i probably would what almost you know. Conspiracy theories are based on two closely at something. You're gonna find patterns that you wanna find exactly so it's it's kind of manipulation reputation of the mind i guess a a self manipulation really but ultimately he he was fascinated by this number so it comes up several times in the movie which i think honestly might have been creative license from the director despite it being <hes> basically basically he <hes> his previous hacker group had gotten away with just basic minor things nothing too serious until eventually he found that guess what we can hack into these large servers these large <hes> protected servers and it turns out they were from the u._s. Military so now we have a young twenty something in germany during the cold war finding pieces of u._s. military information and then transmitting transmitting it to honestly not anybody importance yet but what would become like a pretty big deal so him and his friend group keep doing this and they they start to find like really important certain things like <hes> you know rations of soldiers but also like you don't timings and trainings at the military is doing and some some things it would have been really really helpful for the german army. I would imagine <hes> so. Eventually one of his cohorts gets caught and what happens then. You know you make a deal. Make a plea bargain well. I'll tell you this if you don't prosecute whatever <hes> there is actually such a thing called <hes> espionage amnesty. I think it is where you can be protected from being prosecuted if you come forward with the truth and say this is what i've done identify that i've done this and this and this is the formation of gotten from it <hes> so that's like a like can nationally or internationally recognized thing <hes> so he comes forward and says yes. This is what i've done. <hes> he verifies a lot of stuff but one of the funniest it's not funniest but kind of sad really truthful scenes in these put it in the movie to some degree passwords are easy to figure out yeah quite a few of his <hes> the files he found the password password. Oh kids do that or names pet's names that kind of thing nope and what it really comes down to is that he was one of the first people to at least <hes> internationally recognized as formulas idea that hacking and and identity theft is really based on a social engineering aspect yeah now so most folks. They live on one two three main street. So if i wanna make a password house word <hes> quickly i'm gonna with my with my titled my street in it and it's a it's a case of just wouldn't dwindling things down <hes> so basically he tells them what he's found and and <hes> the tragic part really comes in towards the end where he ends up going missing ryan. They couldn't find him but they did find his car. In a forest. I burt to a chris yeah so <hes> because of the nature of his <hes> unfortunately timely end. It's weird right so the german government calls it a <hes> self inflicted death and everyone's like <hes> interesting. It's fishy because and you can go into some of the things but basically the evidence. They found suggests that he really couldn't have themself in. I mean he was young but if you have <hes> an enemy as it were her it and once you steal someone's stuff you're basically enemy as powerful as let's say the the united states they wanna get fast because they don't want any more that you've i told so instead of hiring which is actually attacked at the most countries due to higher on these people and have them look at <hes> the some people suggest that they just they often so it's really tragic in the in the the sense he was very young and he's one of the first internationally recognized hackers of our age <hes> very very smart yeah <hes> so to the scores i._m._d._b. Gives us seven point three <hes> and of the other three that we normally use. They didn't have any ratings on it. I'm not surprised it's a german women film right so it's kind of hard stateside to get these <hes> reviews because of course if it's not an english people again i wanna watch it <hes> but i give it an eight point. Five wow even with the subtitles it was gripping. I enjoyed the cinematography. It was very dark but it was also kind of like just it it pulls you in <hes> and as of this recording you can find out for free the entire length of the movie ice and it is english dubbed. You can also find it in german but really good film again twenty three nineteen ninety eight good film school yeah yeah. Yes good so i'm gonna. I'm gonna do little public service announcement by the way everybody listening when it comes to passwords no seriously if you wanna make a good password that you are not going to forget stay away from proper names james stay away from street name. Stay refner. Here's what you do you take a quote from a movie song poem. Whatever use the first letter of each word of that quote ooh. It's easier to remember a long string words than it is a bunch of random numbers and letters uh-huh so it was the best of times it was the worst of times take the first letter from each word and then just put a number on the end of it because you can get the password in your head by just reciting the quote and just remembering what the first letter of each word is if you do that it's much easier to remember and it's almost unbreakable because it just looks like to anyone else it just looks like aim random series of letters right and then remember don't go on social media in post about that particular move your poem it just as a drill yeah exactly. She's just be just be aware. I mean passwords are one of those things where they're so important but what i find most people do. We'll just do variations of the same password. Yes exactly. It's not good yeah and this is how celebrities get hacked. I know because it's not that people know their password but people can an answer security questions by doing research about the celebrity like oh. What was the name your first pet. I can find that out on the internet right right so stuff like that. You have to really really be careful about what is alec ball all right. That's enough of that alwyn really well stephen baldwin who never mind one of the ones yeah they're all interchangeable crazy right-wing one atom pick my first pick so way way way back in the mid one thousand nine hundred the whole internet thing was sort of in its consumer infancy yeah had been around for a couple of decades decades before that but then it was just used by the government and some universities to send illumine communicates back and forth to be wrong a._o._l. Who else cds. Oh those i i wanted to build a suit of armor out of them. Had the chance so once the concept of the world wide web and the the internet browser came along it was the beginning of a digital revolution. That pretty much changed the world. Anybody can doubt that and also changed the world of entertainment taint more and more movie studios started putting up websites. I think the oldest one that is still operational is space jam. That website still works. It's still active and it's still so very nineties. Oh it's so fun. It is the best thing thank space jam dot com. As far as i know <hes> you may have to google it how you may have to google being see see it yeah that's amazing and it just looked up and it is so cool geo cities <hes> <hes> i don't know but for some reason warner brothers has kept that that website alive. It's kept on life support for twenty years. Can you imagine how many hits they must actually get to this. It's ridiculous. It is ridiculous but it's so much fun. It's kind of a a nice look back. Of course you can always go onto the internet archive <hes> <hes> the way back machine. If you google the internet archive and go to the way back machine shane they have saved websites going back twenty years. It's pretty cool. It is pretty cool so that's a rabbit hole that is you know that you will fall down for hours but it's a lot of fun. Nevertheless hollywood is we're back to will never pass up an opportunity to exploit a trend or something popular that is true that brings me to my first pick. I call it the nineteen ninety-five stinker from director irwin winkler the net. Oh no oh yes now. If you don't remember the net oh man it's probably for one of two reasons either you never saw or the trauma caused your brain to erase it from your or memory so forgive me if this review triggers you somehow i love the apologize. It's like i'm gonna play biebel. Not ma'am go the jack in what let me just dial in to our yeah. This is the the net pretty much covers almost every early internet cliche and trope from that time period from the mid nineties so what we've got is a young computer programmer played by sandra bullock back when she was still adorable and spunky so she's kind of this borderline agoraphobia she doesn't she hardly ever leaves her home and she works from her computer at an apartment and she does everything she oh she can order pizza. What a concept concepts. You can order pizza from her computer. Oh my god what a world we live my goodness being pizza. Oh hey wait a mino- eating okay <hes> <hes> so she gets in the position of this mysterious floppy disk and i'm doing air quotes for floppy-disk. Can we explain though for minute why it's called all foxy disc <hes> please. It was on asking you. I don't okay because they weren't exactly floppy. They were hard plastic. Well know that the original ones the original big ones ones. We're gonna uaba wobble wobble. I know i had a side business in high school selling them to kids. That's way instead of drugs which is what i sold year and continue cut that so she gets his floppy disk that basically places her in the middle of this vast conspiracy conspiracy as opposed to a minuscule conspiracy there ever small ones. I don't know i i'm sure there are like conspiracies like three people but it never really goes anywhere anywhere conspiracy three people so once she looks at this desk and basically all hell breaks loose for poor sandra bullock because her identity gets erased ooh and replaced with a different identity that has an arrest warrant attached to it so now now. She is a fugitive from justice. They knew everything about me. They must wash on the internet and staring during the personal files of the under secretary of defense thinking the power that they have commit reality won't be treated my information and then my fingerprints trying to go see why meet this summer. Sandra bullock carts in the done it to me. They're going to do it to you b._g. There dean gene at july twenty eight and you've got your typical shadowy cyber terrorists nefarious corporations and a <hes> dennis i miller before he was brainwashed by nine eleven. Oh yeah okay. You know what i'm talking about georgia to be funny. That's fair. That's just sad <hes> <hes> now this is kind of this is a paint-by-numbers kind of a movie but it's so nostalgically bad right so you you look at this and you're thinking oh my god. This is sort of a representation of the nineties. After someone read a computer manual just looked for look at the glossary and just all these terms that they had no idea what they meant and just was like putting oh. What can we do it. That what can we do with us. We can put in here and you know i. I can't really default sandra bullock for this. It's you know <hes> she was in the beginning of her career released around the time which wind speed and stuff like that yeah not doing movies. No no no no she had stopped doing actual speed long before then so you know that was a good rehab movie twenty eight days. Yeah lasted twenty eight days where it was remember that movie a yeah so it's i would watch it. If you're gonna watch should the net watch it as a double feature with one of those old internet safety videos on youtube the internet and you can your family benefit from the internet. What is the troll. No that hasn't happened yet. Is that now but yeah it will. What's that guy from dateline chrysanthemum he his job wasn't in place yet yeah. No he was <hes>. He was still just hanging out. You know say what am i going to do with my life. Internet writers all right but <hes> luckily for sandra bullock the herself. It did not hurt her career. Thankfully she went on to. I do some amazing work in films like speed two cruise control a all about steve and of course bird box. <hes> <music> burt fox. I really wanted that wanted to be good. Oh my god i wish i had a blindfold on when i was watching that movie and earplugs yes exactly so if you're gonna watch it watch it for the bad nostalgia and cannons dodger but the badge laughable kind of nostalgia if you if you you look at it through that kind of context it can be a fun kind of a trip down memory lane or a cautionary tale one or the other of the nineties basically screwed does all up as well <hes> now. Let's get to some numbers. Shall we all right so the net gets a oddly respectable the five point nine out of ten on the internet movie database thirty eight percent on rotten tomatoes. Here's the funny part. There was a t._v. Series is based on the net really ran for one season on the usa network back in one thousand nine hundred ninety eight and what's funny is is that the t._v. t._v. Series gets a better internet movie database score then the movie. The series gets a six point three wow out of ten as opposed to the five point nine probably and and this is just because i'd never seen the series probably because tim curry was in it. He makes everything better. Oh tim curry's awesome. He was like he was like one of the hackers really yeah he was like some like overlord that you love the he's in a guy can't can't think no of course it to guitar picture crap rocky horror picture. Show love the music movie. I'm sorry unless you're seeing it with an audience. It sucks prove me wrong. Ooh don't do so both the net and the net tv series are available right now for free. No one would pay. Hey for them on the crackle streaming service. I don't understand why there is a streaming service. That sounds like a candy bar right. There is so so it's crackle. I think that's owned by sony which is good job marketing that sony <hes> so off free on crackle and rental for three dollars and ninety nine cents on most other services but get it for free download crackle. Watch it on there if you would like might as well yes so. I'm going to log offer now and banded. What's your second pig. Oh man let me just reset my password real quick. Oh no i'm just getting so my second pick was a bit of an interesting one. It's actually more more for documentary. Okay it is from two thousand and one and it's called the secret history of hacking drafted by ralph lee starring john draper and the was himself. Steve was back <hes> so okay. This is a quick little synopsis here or or brief overview m. It's mixed with like pictures of of modern technology at the time talking about you know almost what was twenty years ago so <hes> and then we've got layovers and voiceovers from from was in <hes> john draper on john draper. If you don't know is really famous actually if hackers can be famous. He's a famous hacker but he's more famous as it were for the term freaking. Oh yeah that's p. H. r. e. a. k. i n. Glad you mentioned mentioned that she that's coming up. Is it really oh interesting. This is our go. I have good info for you. See i do this all for you. That's why i'm in kenya. <hes> basically freaking is a slaying kind of term coined to describe activity or the type of people people the underground culture of people who study experiment with telecommunication devices so when i was young we had one of those see-through eighty eighty style like bones the other wires and stuff in yeah and one of my brothers try to take it apart didn't work out so well yeah yeah yeah. He's in the military now so god be with him. <hes> so the the term freaking is really abundant in this movie and they kind of go over it so here's the premise right how does hacking and programming lead to today's <hes> tech inventions now if you don't know steve wozniak is a co founder under of apple he's a project founder of apple one and two <hes> and he is kind of a comfortable guy seems like a nice guy. Entrepreneur learns the loves crossword puzzles then. Do you ever see that that article. He was like top of the <hes> <hes> crossword puzzles scoreless on some application than he developed and he was like hey tweeting out play me whatever and he always wanted dinner also created breakout for atari. Oh wow recipes atari indicates <hes> so basically they're give examples of at that time again modern technology and of course we're looking at the flip phone in <hes> sort of a singular what do they call jose baloch phones before they had flip phones but they were smaller and they could fit in your pocket like a nokia but without a flip i mean at that point they're talking about how <hes> hacking telephone bases and cell towers led to the invention of having telephones. That kind of thing steve wozniak of course is talking about all. This stuff is a notable program. We can only assume that some of that maybe prowess and technology has gone into the current line of iphone or any iphone really because the iphone came out one seven seven seven nine roughly roughly the somewhere around there so i mean he had a long established history and then all of a sudden. We have this like revolutionary revolutionary device. I mean the iphone has changed the world yeah i think he left apple long before that he did he. Did i mean i think what was it like chosen the one thousand nine nine he left. I'm pretty sure there's a lot earlier than that because he's in a plane crash pretty much. He had a lot of time to recover from right seriously injured. He was like an advisory type. Gotcha you're right. You're right <hes> so i don't wanna spoil it too much but it's about fifty minutes. <hes> and i think you'll find it very surprising. Some of the commentary they also was really kinda cool to as you remember in matrix where they said fall the white rabbit or whatever i can't remember what it is split something like that right but they all have like names they all have like aliases and some guys some famous hackers is called like jubilee and it's like couldn't you think something cooler like dark night of the weber something like that but i mean ultimately it's a documentary and there are some really cool things in it <hes> in regards to that at that time modern technology so give it a go you can currently find it on youtube for free fifteen minutes believe it or not it's actually put on by the discovery channel so it's on their channel so it's legal and cool to watch <hes> scores i am to be gives us seven point six very very high up there. <hes> rotten tomatoes and metacritic didn't actually have a rating which i do for bone to pick about that but we'll get to that point. I'm giving it an eight point. You know we thought it was hilarious. When i was talking but i thought it was really interesting and then it was trying to remember myself who i was until eleven i mean one. I was a freshman in high school and i. I actually didn't even have a phone that i one tells the eighteen but anyway it's it's crazy to go back that far and i know that <hes> it's not necessarily that far away but time moves faster astor when you get older boys at true. It's so true anyways. I was thinking we should have an alias like can i have alias. What do you want your alias alias to be. Oh how about like breakfast source okay syllables. It's a lot yeah. Just just give me some time. Oh get there but in any case that's my second and final pick. I really really enjoyed it has steve wozniak and it was the walls. <hes> komo name be fried chicken sandwich. Yes one hundred percent. Yes ooh. I want to be pickles pickles. Yeah eh pickles like tommy pickles from the rats or they may like actual pickles now beaming food boy all right you go with your pick all right then well. Actually you're kind of dovetails into my pick which is kind of interesting. Oh so my second pick is what i consider to be. The ocean's eleven hacker movies this is without a doubt one of my all time favorite films and i'm talking about nineteen ninety two's sneakers sneakers yeah. This is so much never seen fine. It is a fun fun movie. It's one of the best casts ever assembled got robert redford sidney portier. Dan ackroyd mary mcdonnell river phoenix recipes and sir ben kingsley. Oh dan le let him now where this comes in where your pick comes in it starts basically in the late late sixties with these two friends martin in cosmo and they are kind of a sort of prototypical steve jobs steve wozniak type. They're buddies but they're they're freezers. Okay which means they take it they can phone lines and they do all this kind of stuff too and they they hack into student records and they trying to hack into government mid stuff because their social activists and things like that so unfortunately during one of these expeditions so they're doing this <hes> this sort of hacking working session and martin goes out for pizza but while he's out for pizza his friend gets busted by the feds all right they raid they raided their dorm and they and he gets busted right and he goes to jail so we fast forward twenty five years martin who is still officially officially a fugitive. He has a new identity. He is now leading. This sort of ragtag team of a computer experts who are hired to hack into security systems was to discover their flaws so his team breaks into high tech systems to find out how to break into them and then they let the company know. Here's here's where you're vulnerable which is pretty. That's an actual thing right so oneday agents from the n._s._a. Which is spies and everybody wants to you. Hire the team to retrieve this mysterious black box. There outlaws the government we don't we want to hire you on the right. Side of the long job is to find the little black box. You have the idol robert redford. Can you guarantee my safety. Dan ackroyd stations ben kingsley. Mary mary mcdonald an excellent marksman river phoenix sidney poitier direct almost coalescing versus niggers rated p._g. Thirteen number nine hundred select areas in september eleventh everywhere now this box. It's very nondescript looking the was built into an answer and old answering machine <hes> <hes> this box can apparently break into any computer system on the planet and control it. It's got some crazy <hes> fuzzy logic algorithm kind of thing being <hes> that can break into anything so of course anybody that possesses. This box is in danger from pretty much everybody. Everybody wants to get their hands on this thing because if you have the power to basically break into any computer system no matter how sophisticated you have a lot of power even in nineteen ninety five. You've got lots of power so the team has to first of all. They have to find this box. They have to acquire or this box from the person that has it and then once they acquired the box. What are they gonna do with it. They really wanna give it to the n._s._a. Do they i wanna keep it. Do they want to destroy it. What do they want to do. You don't want it to fall into the wrong hands. It could be useful in the future it could be used but but is it too dangerous to be kept intact right because something like this. You know you'd spend the rest of your life running from everyone everyone that wants this thing unless you destroy it so they've got a bit of a conundrum on their hands <hes> so now this plot is really cool. Cool and there are some very suspenseful scenes in it too. It's like <hes>. There's some nice cat and mouse game stuff going on sir. You know there's it's really really cool cool but what i really love about. This movie is the quirky personalities of the cast of characters here you got dan ackroyd paranoid conspiracy theorist. I <hes> david strengthens like sweet blind hacker guys. You're really nice guys blind but a hacker <hes> but he does everything by sound <hes> <hes> so all these people <hes> they give this film a frill family kind of feeling you actually feel like this group is a is a true family family of misfits and reliant each other and it really it really is nice <hes> <hes> and that more than anything else really gives this film. I think it's it's it's life and energy. Get some funny moments in it as well some really funny stuff. I recommend if you have never seen sneakers. Go find this film and watch it. It's so fun. It's it's nostalgic and a good way unlike the net but i think i think if you like those kinds of films you were really really enjoy it so i'm going to get to the scores scores internet movie database seven out of ten a seventy six percent on rotten tomatoes which is fresh fresh tomatoes at is available to rent for two dollars and ninety nine cents on most streaming services including voodoo amazon prime google play and i tunes right so any honorable mentions any shout you wanna give. I don't have any honorable mentions. Charlotte's are always a thing <hes> so couple of things <hes> i would lake to let everybody know that we're coming up on season two. Yes we are. It's it's going to be amazing guys. It's going to be so much fun. <hes> at the end of this month and we're in september <hes> our our host pumping will actually have us on their page for an entire week sustained to them. Give them a follow their platform <hes> they take care of us but they're going to be featuring some of our cool <hes> episode clips and it's going to be really great for us so check that out <hes> i'd like to give a shoutout to travis and jay jay and belligerent podcast <hes> that's about it. It was good you. I enjoyed the show. I enjoyed the show too. I thought it was a a great deal fund and i certainly hope to god that we are not <hes> that we're not hacked by anyone. Though you know what i say though is that you can hack me. Just pay my bills. That's all i mean you can take my denny. Just pay the bills. That's all i care about. I mean i mean i will also have a go fund me set up to then pay for all those things the so to recap our picks for this episode <hes> manda. What were your picks again. My first pick was twenty three three two german film <hes> and my second pick was the secret history of hacking from children one with steve wozniak both of which by the way are free on youtube as of this recording that very nice so once again my two picks were the <hes> sandra bullock crap fest the net but like i said if you're into nostalgia that's bad had you should watch it and one of my favorite films of all time sneakers with robert redford and sidney poitier around around that that was a good episode nice. Welcome back episode after a couple of weeks furlough. Yeah i think so i think so so it's going to be agreed soon soon coming up and we're gonna have a lot more content and we'll also. I think we're aiming to do <hes>. What is it one episode per week for the month over. Yes we're going to try to one episode of we. We're gonna blanket. Blanket october with the fun of horror films heck yeah so it's gonna be exciting yeah different genres for each yes. We're going to do different genres for each. We're gonna did you harder but different types as sort of subject to spectrum people. Oh my goodness yes. We could just get their podcast at just to horror films anyway. I listen into one that thought you could talk much park. You're not as hard as a horror film horror elements to it for sure but the context. It's like this is cool. It's apartment dinosaurs yeah yeah so we have one more episode. One more episode of season one left to go so we're gonna make like rodney dangerfield and go back to school. Oh yeah anything in that respect too. You know you're all right and no not because i never got my g._e._d. I never learned to read aide. University of phoenix would help out with that really probably for good reason anyway so we've got our fortnight themed backpacks from target and we are ready to fill them with our favorite school related movies. Oh man so for relief. Stay tuned for foul. How play the only podcast devoted entirely to poultry themed sports <hes> this week host stubby and mitch tackle the controversy over allowing cornish game ends to play in the same field as roosters feathers will fly right smaller. It's not nice. I know that's why there's a controversy fair enough. See i mean they tackle the issues that other people will not tear afraid to tackling the issue. That's right oh so don't be chicken house. Listen today and that is it for us for this episode for the man delorean he and all of us here in studio d. I'm tom feeney. Are you ready ready to end this. I'm ready. Let's do it three to one. We'll see you next time by special. Thanks to spirits of symphonic and echo craft for our amazing theme music links to both artists artists can be found on our website. The deep dive podcast dot pod bean dot com. If you like us you can subscribe an itunes pod being <music> overcast or wherever fine podcasts are the deep dive. Podcast is a production of automaton media strange game winning not to how about a nice game of chess.

steve wozniak sandra bullock youtube apple google Dan ackroyd director tom feeney united states robert redford sidney poitier ben kingsley ibm john draper germany writer rodney dangerfield
Tired of "Upsets" and Tom Crean Edition

Courtside with Seth Greenberg

53:02 min | 9 months ago

Tired of "Upsets" and Tom Crean Edition

"Slam Jam Ben. Dick what are you doing warming up to the game. I will all the Games I watch even when I can't get tickets. It helps bring stadium atmosphere to where everyone watching all the diaper. Daddy doesn't again come on Dick. Save it for the air. We've got a game and checkout vivid seats. It's the easiest way to get all the tickets to the Games. You want to go to seats for the window. Welcome to the world's greatest podcast courts with Greenberg dockage. I'm Seth Greenberg Conference. Play is in full swing today and I would be looking at this weekend's results what's and looking ahead to a loaded week of games. Plus Georgia head coach. Tom Crean joins US ahead of his huge game against the Kentucky wildcats before we get started. I WANNA remind you to subscribe rate in review the podcast wherever you listen. It really helps us and helps other people find and the world's greatest podcast better known as courtside also tell a friend about the world's greatest podcast we bring it every single week. We take no playoff. We take no days off. This is real talk. This is coach to coach. This is the way it really is. This is it. I think it's like this. This is real straight talk. Talk courtside the world's greatest podcast and finally check out the WOGE pod you know. Last week we talked to the Great Jeff Van Gundy about David Stearns is legacy. If you like that conversation woge and Jalen rose go even deeper into the life of the late NBA Commissioner. You can get the world's pod wherever wherever you're listening to this podcast at the Buzzer Again sometime onstage. courtside with Greenberg and dockage definitive college basketball podcast Welcome to courtside with Greenberg and baggage face. Lead is not the definitive podcast on basketball. It is the world's greatest podcast on anything life basketball and anything else you would like to know about but then I got a couple of kind of taking me off a little bit I vent. They're a little bit first and foremost most all this talk about upsets upset. Upsets half of these Games aren't upsets. When Florida State Goes Into Louisville team? I I question how tough right now now in this moment in time. Florida state the Rodney. Dangerfield college basketball. Their length athleticism number guys that can drop twenty-five onion given bait. That's not an upset Villanova. Losing Marquette Marquette was favored making. That's not an upset Memphis and Georgia Georgia going into Memphis. And we're going to talk to Tom. Onscreen later let's face it no. Dj Jeffries Memphis Young Basketball team. Georgia has got. It's GonNa be one-two-three draft. That's not an upset about the the only game that was a real upset to me. This weekend was maybe Wisconsin. Ohio State Wisconsin has struggled this season so to me the whole thing about look you're in league play a more level playing field. There's no defining team there's no defining player so like we're losing our minds Evansville being Kentucky's upsets. Jeff Austin that those are the outliers. These other games aren't upsets now. I'm going to tell you why we have even more level playing field. I'm GonNa give you three numbers. Sixty four seventy nine eighty six. That's the number of underclassmen that put their names in the draft and stayed in the last three years sixty in for three years ago. Seventy nine two years ago in eighty six now. The last time I checked only sixty guys are drafted. The last time I checked back there about fifteen to twenty overseas last time I checked. They're upperclassmen seniors so someone is telling these guys back in the day of guy was promise the first round or a lottery he was coming back to college. How different would circus be without shaved and toughest battle? How different would even a West Virginia? A new team rebounded every missed shot would be without sags cannot day so like you have these guys that are getting advice to go out. That aren't not even getting drafted all right that if basically have nowhere to go and they're going to say well they're making money. Well some of them are making money so make money. Some are taking pay cuts. Let's be honest with it so okay like why do we have a more level playing field because we have a bunch of dudes that went out. That probably aren't were drafted. That are probably not ignored. Ignored much money and instead of having that college experience and also being on teams that could be a little bit better competing for tournament. Bids Sweet Sixteen bids Forbids so there's a reason behind it but this is upsetting. I'm tired of the when you get league play. Man I don't WanNa hear about the upsets beset is in the NBA draft to present the NBA. Battles not What is making money like I remember telling? Dj Y in two thousand and eight. He was player of the year in the big ten at Indiana and I remember telling him you know so even when you go to the NBA. This what people don't understand even when you go to the NBA unless you're on one of the two or three teams you with Lebron or something you're not on national TV nearly as much as you are When you're at Indiana you know and and you're not seeing nearly as much and I didn't say that to not make him go to the NBA? I just simply we were talking and it's interesting to me because what is making money you know is making money a thousand dollars playing somewhere overseas a thousand a month is is you You Know Robbie Hummel has some great everybody that plays overseas has some great stories of how man when I was at purdue and I got hurt or after a game man. I'd trainers wrapping my knees. I had all this kind of stuff because when I'm playing in Russia they're like yeah. The ice machines brings down the hall. Man You're good. I mean it's just not yet figured out two things in college basketball set and I'm wrong and everybody can criticize size me. I've not I've not figured yet out why it's such a bad experience number one to play in college basketball. I I've not understood that and the second thing I understood don't understand is completely separate is why it's so bad to sit out a year when you transfer like every guy I've ever coached. said it was the greatest year their life. I wanted to redshirt when I was in Indiana just because I didn't want to be yelled at for a minute and I wanted to kind of hang out and be be get stronger stronger. Bigger all that kind of stuff. Those things amazed me like people act like playing people. Always say like you and me Bilas Fran Lonzo finds. Oh wow you guys earn your money on the backs of these college basketball players man. I don't know about you but I had a blast playing college college basketball. I don't care who made the money. It was fun. I I don't understand that anyway. That's different than what you're saying I know but everybody's in such a hurry to do what. What are you in a hurry ready to leave college for like I get it Anthony Edwards? We're GONNA have Tom Crane on as you mentioned is going to be a top five. Pick all right leave college because it's you know it's generational money yeah and it's the NBA and you know you're going to be in the NBA. And that's every kid's dream. Hell I wanted to be the next Bob Love Jerry. Sloan Chicago Bulls Man. That's what I wanted to be so I get it but when somebody sits there from the NBA and tells you know this is not going to happen for you and yet you still decide to do it. That's dumb seeking out someone to tell you what you WanNa hear. Because that's all you're one. These guys are seeking out someone where you're going to be the guy that makes it. You're going to be the UNDRAFTED guy. You're going to be this. You're going to be that and you might be and that's great and look that's terrific but there's also value to having some market you for year. There's also a value today. I don't WanNA get into because we're going to get off mark but of college players athletes. It's never had a better cost. vers the male situation. The way they travel sat right there. People say well maybe they don't WanNa go to class. Guess Sweat you really don't have to go to class. You can take classes online. What they want get up in the morning and trudge across clad? You don't have to hell you literally. Don't I have to go to pass. You literally can do all of your class in the morning whenever you want online and be all all around the clock basketball player partier. Whatever you are in college it you said it's never been better now understanding my friend? So now we're linked play and league play. There's Ziva more level playing field that there is a finer line because of and I'm not gonNA use the word parody because there are more teams that have a chance to win on any given night. Let's put it that that way within your league which are should be when you get league play. This should be some commonality within the league and it should be a finer line within league so this past weekend what was your take on. You Got Ohio State Maryland. What is your take on Ohio state in this moment allman in time hat not having young is that as big a deal as maybe people didn't realize they've lost two games? Edwin Washington have young. Wants a frontcourt player. Wants a big time jump shooter. What's your take on like Ohio State? In this moment of time a team. We thought two weeks ago was best even the country. A give you my take on a higher state. But it involves Wisconsin. I thought Wisconsin was the worst Wisconsin team. I've seen since since nineteen ninety seven or ninety five going backwards to in one thousand nine hundred ninety one. When I came into the big ten? I thought it was. I thought it was historically bad. And you mentioned league play Seth. I'm GonNa tell you what I think about Wisconsin -Sconsin but or excuse me Ohio state. But before I do I gotTa tell you. League place. Tough and Wisconsin has all of a sudden figure some things out within their own team. They went to Tennessee. He'd be the mediocre but still Tennessee Tennessee by twenty then beat Ohio State. I think Ohio State is reeling in a lot of areas. I obviously my sons there. He asked me what I think. I'll tell you exactly what I told him. I think it's a bad passing team. I think it's a team. That's very careless with the basketball. The turnovers come in bunches. The turnovers come At a time when you either can take the game from five point lead to a twelve point lead. And when you don't do that that causes problems they're not a good passing team. Losing Washington and young might be the two most important people on the team other than Caleb lesson that has been good the freshman kid carton. They lost confidence. I saw IT I. It looks like I saw right in the middle of the West Virginia game where he turned down. Show this cocky kid. This is a kid that thinks of himself as the next Isaiah Thomas the good Isaiah Thomas going backwards The Detroit Pistons Seth. I think you know at Washington not being being in the in. The West Virginia game was huge. Losing young that's huge but the truth matter. Is this a team. That doesn't value the ball and when you don't value the ball against against the teams in the big ten. They do value the ball Wisconsin under this regime. With Gregg Guard Michigan. When you had John Beeline Line and Tom. Izzo has always had high regard for the ball. You give up possessions. They don't you'RE GONNA lose. And that's exactly what Hap- I'm anxious to see tonight because I think Maryland is is really good Maryland had trouble at tiny lizard views. Giving up the ball. I'm anxious to see what happens tonight. My Maryland is I agree. But they're taking much better care. The badge numbers like decide about sixteen percent of their possessions that Ohio State twenty percent of their possessions. They turned into which is a crazy number to me. I mean just you know especially Ashley. 'cause they're playing basically three Peru Peru what I call perimeter players at all time. Maryland's my biggest concern. Is They beat Indiana and they shut third number seven field that you win a game shot thirty nine percent from the field that they get expert extra possessions under glass. I do like when they play. Stick Smith at the five. This'll be an interesting matchup. Caleb Stick Smith that'll be a game kind of within the game. 'cause Smith can go on the floor and at and defend I'm GONNA give you another team too big time. We'll just the jump around little bit. The joy in the game is back at Michigan State. And what I mean by that is when I talked to Tom About two weeks ago about this by two three weeks ago right after finals. He said that cashes came into the gym with a genuine smile on his his face and when he smiled it enabled everyone else to smile enable time to pack the coaching his team gave enable those those other guys maybe to take a deep breath and just have cash back as as their as their teammate. And you know all teams are quote unquote families is Michigan. State is a very tight group. I I think they they all share in like any team would share his pain. But you could see the joy in playing the game and you could see the enjoyment in that Michigan game. Yeah shots went in but the energy energy in the body language in the enthusiasm and the passion and the fun to me. It started probably about two weeks ago ago starting to Crescendo without the city Illinois Michigan game is it is evident to us. It is to me that you can see the joy and the fun back in the game for those guys. Oh Yeah Yeah I mean look I don't think caches. Winston has game two weeks ago and Michigan instate seemed. What's the right word stale? I guess is what it is now. You know what Seth maybe. It was big rivalry. But when you told me I think on last week's podcast that You know that was how Tom described caches. I I'm not surprised what happened because Michigan State's really good and we caches. Winston plays like that. There's good as anybody if they can shoot it. No I I saw it. Seth and I saw it clearly. I think that you know we all let me. We're GONNA jump around on so let me jump around at you. We always say no great teams no great teams this year. I've been the leader of the movement but I'm starting to think to myself. Wait a second here. What's the definition of a good team and one of the things that defines a good team? Winning a ton of games or great team is winning on a game. I'm sitting here thinking to myself. I know Wendell Wendell. Moore's out but Duke went down to Miami won by thirty some I we. Are we going to start start to see a week from now. We're going to say wait a second duke. My just be a great team. I agree with do schedule sets up where they can get a little bit of momentum. Yeah I mean if you look at look at their schedule right now. The schedule is very favorable. Look what do you need to have a good team. You need to have very record all right. Who can spend the ball and keep the ball out of the language? They had that check. Do you need a frontcourt guy that can protect the rim rebound the basketball and scored. I got that burn carries. You needed a blend between gene youthful exuberance experience that got guys like Jack Light. Come off the bench Come off the bench Alex O'CONNELL your gold wire who really can defend and then you need guys to step up and start to emerge matthew hurt the last four games fourteen points a game shooting like sixty three percent shooting a three three and coach K.'s. Teams have always better what he's had a stretch for the is back in Duke. These guys are defending. They were UC in and out. Food for a while. That's nuke without the D- But now they're back to kind of get in passing lanes. 'cause you when you have a guy who can guard keypad Elaine. You can get the passing lane so I agree I think Duke is a bad performance against Stephen F. Austin Seabra Was the reason they had a bad performance because they basically physically went after them didn't back down kept it on the side than I was. Phyo tough attack you off. The bathroom beat to drive them in. Running offense against Duke is difficult. Driving is not as difficult if you move them and then drive them So yeah I think Duke has been to me big picture. Sure the most impressive team and maybe a team that has even the most room for growth moving forward he. Kansas beat Georgetown. When into Michigan State and one went into Virginia Tech and one last five games no one scored over sixty three points points against do now they got Georgia Tech? Wake forest at Clemson Sotoudeh next three on the road against teams as should beat setting up pretty nice. Pretty Nice Nice homestand dining with Louisville than Miami then Pittsburgh so you know I agree I look. We're we're going to sit here and everybody. You know the narrative in college basketball because there's so much going on changes in one of the one of the narratives about not a great team. That may be changing here in a little bit when it gets to be about twenty two and one. I don't know about you but that that screams a little greatness To me it really does. WHO's best league right now? Said big ten big Big Big East guys. Tell me it's big east. The Big East top to bottom top to bottom is the best league. Because there's no bottom. I mean Providence. Now that was kind of starting to play again and this is a province team that is apathetic does have size does have good guards. Cer- top the bottom. I'm not sure there's a bottom of the Bay of Big East now in terms of the number of teams that potentially our second weekend final four potential. I think it's the big ten. I think it's the big ten and after that I tell you I I don't know where would fit the ACC all right. Because I look at the ACC. Duke is a is an elite T- they're they're they are really really good. I think. Florida state the Rodney Dangerfield of college basketball. squall is a second weekend elite team. The number guys who can score the length the depth. They turned over that that Patrick Williams I could kill you one night. I'm Jay Walker. Could be the next guy. Trade cars could be the next night then. The Celtics Every Shot Louisville to me. There's something missing in in such as they need to get consistent point play I. It's like Chris Max teams have edge. He played with an edge as a player. You'll fit Xavier teams. They had message. I don't see the edging this Louisville team. They need someone else. Jordan had a big game day. But then you know they didn't have someone step aside after that. Let me ask you. Are you sold on a Virginia and state has a chance they they they need to get. CJ price back. I mean who else jumps out. He goes the roof. I wouldn't WANNA play seth. Ah I'll tell you this in the ACC. I'll tell you a team that can that can beat at somebody and I told Mike Brady this this weekend guy could see your team getting hot over a couple of weeks. I agree on Wednesday eight now thinking. Now I watch you know I think most people Syracuse Notre Dame. Saturday was the most fun game I may have done in my nine years. You man that was back and forth. Dude you're making jump shots and big time ones and and and and Mike and I had a conversation in the locker room beforehand. He asked me what I thought and I said look the way college basketball is and the way you guys can shoot the ball. I wouldn't be surprised if he went on a two week. Win Five out of six something like something like that. We're now of a sudden you jump into the national consciousness. I don't know Oh that Syracuse can do it. They had a great night that night and Joe Gerard. isn't guys and that when challenged jumps up and plays the Graham. Now what's that. They have no one at the rim. No that's that's what I was going to say. They just don't seem like they have another look set. If you're going to put together an all American contain mony from motor name has got to be on this thing because when you watch when you like. If you'RE GONNA say all right list the most valuable player to his team in each league. I'm I'm not so sure like I know Vernon Carey is really valuable to Duke. I get it but I'm not sure there's any you take you take John Mooney off of Notre Dame. I'm not sure they can beat the three of us. I mean he's that he's that good. You know I agree with you. I I have not to Beim at NC state and I So we're GONNA do a little special thing on moon hopefully good chance to have even show us his rebounding technique but I started watching tate just on his rebounds I literally just clipped off about a hundred of his rebounds. I'll tell you what he does. This is something that we hear it. All the time he pursues reebok like every rebound for these are the foul line going after he's been a wing he's he's going after if he's in traffic he's coming up with it if it's Below the rim hit. The dude goes after every every single rebound and then on top of that. They're shooting like the last five games. Shoot over forty from the three day. Goodwin's getting better. I've really been impressed with did the two guys. TJ GIBBS is starting to play like a senior which is really important your seniors have to play like seniors and Prentice Hob even though sometimes I imagine Russian. Why is he shooting that but in all the he played with no confidence a year ago he starting to play with a confidence that that is really really important to this team? So I agree with I. Think Archer Dame is is really has a chance to take a step forward disobeyed difference. Did you stay coming off the loss at Clemson though. CJ BRYCE didn't turn you only at three steals. They can't win out with only three steals at Marquel Johnson. Like the like Marco Johnson supposed to be that guy. He's got to start talking about seniors. He's got to start playing like that guy 'cause you know what he didn't play like that guy in the Clemson game us loose with the ball all his decision. Makings not good. This'll be a really good game. I'm really I'm excited to gut the six o'clock flight to rally tomorrow morning. I'm I'm excited. That the call that game to be at that game I think is chess me really good one. Let me let me ask you about another team. A team on the other end of things again at Michigan Estate Michigan Meghan struggled a little bit. Here Seth you mentioned Ohio State no question. Well you know what Michigan they were terrific. We know this to start to season. It went back and tough game. Tough game at Louisville. I don't know how you'RE GONNA win that game and they get they get pounded. They're a little bit. How do you think Michigan is ultimately as we move through the season? I think they're going to be fine. I think livers. They need him back. They need his shotmaking Pesky like he's really good. He's really good. I mean he scores around the basket. He's patient which is great thing for for post players. I think they'll be fine. I'm not as yeah. I know. Everyone Loves Xavier Simpson. And he's very good I I'm not sure he's a final four point guard I think he he has already been one mm-hmm Yeah I'm championship game. I just something about his game that I'm not totally totally totally sold on with this team. He had he had around two. Yeah right right so I mean I. It's going to be interesting to see if they like. How good how good is Kansas Kansas? The last game West