5 Episode results for "Mr Manson"
Encore: National Parks | The Great Disaster | 4
"Join one re plus in apple podcasts. Or the wandering app to listen to american history tellers early and ad free. This is a special encore presentation of our series on america's national parks as many of us return to traveling but remain mindful of social distancing. Our national park system is experiencing record attendance but many visitors may be unaware of the turbulent and sometimes controversial histories behind such natural wonders as yosemite yellowstone. And the grand canyon in this series. We'll meet the naturalists politicians and eccentrics who fought to preserve the most beautiful an unblemished corners our country and we'll also meet the indigenous peoples and early settlers who sometimes fought back magin. It's the early hours of april eighteenth. Nineteen o six son. Hasn't yet risen. But like peeks around the curtains. Your apartment bedroom. Your husband lies asleep beside you but you're wide awake for the past two months. Your newborn violet has been waking you each morning before dawn to nurse. This is the first night since she was born that she still soundly sleeping. You should be relieved. But you're a light sleeper and your body is tense alert waiting for a cry from the other room. Suddenly you hear something but it's not what you expect. It's like the sound just before your hit by a wave down by the beach walls begin to tremble your bed jerk sharply away from the wall wail rises from the other room. He bolt out of bed and shake your husband charles. Wake up. it's an earthquake. Charles flings max the covers before he can stand a great portion of plaster from the ceiling crashes on his head. He's all right with. The room is suddenly filled with dust. You start to cough. Would your both thinking the same thing violet you rushed to the nursery out of in the parlor you can hear the crashes of china plates knickknack shattering the heavy clanging thought of your grandfather clock toppling over the floor begins a slant and you hear an explosion from the apartment across the hall you grab your streaming donor. Shield her face with a blanket or return to living room. Where charleston's cleared a path to the door. He holds your coat in the family cat under one arm. Party the stairs on the landing. You can see that your neighbors doors off its frame. Smoke billows from their apartment into the staircase you pray that you make it down to three stories before the place collapses explodes or burst into flames. By the time you're family makes it to the bottom level. Shaking has mercifully stopped. Your neighbors are out in the street. One of them calls to the fire departments on its way your apartment doesn't appear to be burning yet when her neighbors unit is ablaze. It appears as if the whole building sinking into the earth on one side leaning on the building next door if the firemen can contain the fire and time. Maybe you can rescue a few things before. The fire spreads your grandfather's watch violence christening gown. Here make way firemen rushed. Pass you into the burning building and other start to hook up their hoses to firemen grab the hose expecting a rush of water. When they released the vow. nothing happens. A small drizzle of water shoots out a few feet from the end of the hose. Sputters and dies. Turn the dam water on. It is on the pie broken during the shake by now above you. Your apartment is in flames. Charles takes your hand. You hold violet tight. You're covered in plaster dust. Everything you own his burning. You're all alive even the cat you turn away from your burning home only to realize it's not just you cross the city. Buildings are titled crumbling. They're burning you. Pray that the water pipes of held up better elsewhere than they did on your street. But for most of san francisco they did not american history tellers sponsored by clave vio- attention commerce founders entrepreneurs side hustlers marketers and growth hackers. If you're working round the clock to build your dream ecommerce business. You need an e commerce marketing platform that works just as hard as you do. That means unique. Clave you with klay vio. You'll delight customers and drive revenue at the same time with personalized email. An sms marketing campaigns. That you can design and send in minutes plus building. A marketing campaign is drag and drop easy. You get started with your first campaign. In under an hour in easily. Build from there with cleo's best-performing templates to get started with a free trial of flavio. Visit flavio dot com slash. Listen that's k. L. a. v. i. y. o. dot com slash. Listen we get support from thumb tack. How you ever stop your to do list from growing. You could become a magician or you can do what i did and download thumb tack. It's the app the fines local pros for all your home projects. Hire a plumber to fix your leaky faucet or a handyman. To hang your curtains you can even higher up road organiz your messy closet. Yep there are people in your city who specialize in that. I actually just downloaded the thumb tack. And i could feel my apartment breathe. Sigh of relief. Hellofresh paint in an ac unit that actually works on the thumb tack app. You can compare prices read reviews and chat with directly when you found the right person. You can book them with just a tap. All of those annoying projects will just disappear. Maybe it is a little magic download them tack and start your next project today from wondering islands graham and this is american history. Tellers our history your store. The nineteen o. Six san francisco earthquake was one of the worst natural disasters in history. With an estimated magnitude of seven point eight it was felt from los angeles to oregon and as far inland as nevada. Three thousand people died the disaster destroyed. Twenty eight thousand buildings leaving more than half. The city's residents two hundred twenty five thousand people homeless while the earthquake itself was hugely destructive. The majority of damage was actually caused by fires sparked by leaking gas. They spread quickly with a high winds. Coming off the san francisco bay at the same time. The quake destroyed much of the city's water services leaving firefighters with virtually no water pressure to fight the blazes. It would take them at least three days to contain the flames. Meantime fire crews were forced to draft water from sewers and blow up buildings in order to prevent the conflagration from spreading over the next several years. City officials argue that. If san francisco had had a reservoir on hand when the earthquake hit its water. supply wouldn't have failed. It would have been better prepared to fight the fires and the city might have been saved as it happened. Some officials had been pushing for just such a project for years and they knew the perfect place for it yosemite national park in this episode will learn how preservationists ran up against the political machine of san francisco and how a battle between two friends with different environmental philosophies led to the destruction from a sacred piece of yosemite national park long before the nineteen o six earthquake. San francisco had a problem with water during the goldrush city faced a severe shortage the small streams that had once supplied local tribes such as the aloni couldn't meet the needs of the booming population as a result. Warner costs fluctuated daily. Thirsty forty niners resorted to purchasing water at sky high prices from enterprising vendors who halted by mule from local streams. Twice a day. Tugboat captains made top dollar transporting water across the bay from sausalito and selling it to locals. The shortage was a golden imitation to financiers and land barons eager to make a buck soon. Big water companies were san francisco's leading power players. They set the rules an answer to no one. The most powerful of these companies was the spring valley water company throughout the eighteen fifty and eighteen sixties. The spring valley water company bought up. Its competition finally in eighteen. Sixty two it secured a monopoly of the lake. Mur- said water supply with no one to compete with and no incentive to improve or even maintain. Its equipment the company behaved with impunity in eighteen. Ninety seven san francisco elected mayor. James phelan he argued that the spring valley water company was strangling the city's residents with it's outrageous prices. He declared that the city needed to find a new independent source of water. Three years later in one thousand nine hundred. San francisco's charter was amended to require the city to secure. Its own supply of water. Finally breaking the monopoly of the spring valley. water company. Phelan ordered the public utilities commission to begin considering options for alternate sources. The commission eventually return with his findings. The best local source was the to allah me river. It was fed by sierra. Snow melt and therefore exceptionally pure but the growing city would need a lot of water. The best way to collect on a large scale would be too damn valley called hetch. Hetchy there was just one problem. The hetch hetchy valley was part of yosemite national park. Henchi was one of john. Muir's favorite spots in yosemite bonder cups wallflowers monkey flower and lupin grew all along the valley floor watered by pristine snow melt deer and bighorn. Sheep graze between douglas firs california black oaks and ponderosa pines while black bears fish for rainbow trout. The valley was even home to over seventeen different species of bat for thousands of years. It was also home to the me walk and you. Tribes muir had camped in huyton hatching many times but to him. The place also held a spiritual significance from. You're the hetch. Hetchy valley was a church. He was outraged by feelings proposal to it. He felt the move. Set a dangerous precedent if you could flood hetch hetchy a jewel of biodiversity inside a protected national park what was next others shared his views five years earlier in eighteen ninety two had co founded the sierra club and environmental association whose purpose was to protect the sierra nevada. Its membership included. Scientists lawyers artists and politicians and many shared mir's belief that development in hetch hetchy would equal desecration but phelan was confident. His plan offered the best way to free the city from the clutches of the spring valley water company and in february nineteen o. One congress passed the federal right of way act allowing the government to undertake projects in national parks and force reserves related to power communication and water supply. The hetch hetchy demining project appeared to fall under it. It seemed the way was clear. Then in september president william mckinley was assassinated theodore. Roosevelt came into office and make conservation a cornerstone of his agenda but phelan went ahead with his plans in october. He applied on behalf of the city to the federal government for the right to dam. Hetch hetchy initially. It seemed the application had been approved but then in december nineteen three word came that the application was being rejected by roosevelt's interior secretary. Ethan hitchcock hitchcock was a strong admire of john muir. He felt yosemite status as a national park called for the preservation of its natural curiosities or wonders in their natural condition and he disagreed with failings claim that hetch hetchy was the most viable source of water for the city. He rejected feelings application. The city of san francisco appealed the decision arguing that flooding hetchy would actually enhance the beauty of the park when moore heard this argument near reportedly snorted as well may damning. New york's central park would enhance its beauty. The appeal was rejected. Falen applied again in nineteen o five after his tenure. As mayor had ended he received the same answer. No imagine it's winter of nineteen o five. You're sitting in the office of gifford pinch. Oh the two of you met fundraiser in the red room of the willard hotel two nights prior you used to be a public works commissioner for san francisco under mayor. Phelan not anymore though. Now you're private citizen and you've come to dc under your own steam. You're hoping somehow to convince the administration to approve the hetch hetchy project. you believe. It's important when you bumped into pinto head of the newly created department of forestry. You hoped you might have an ally in show seemed interested in hearing about your mission after a few minutes chatting at the party. He suggested that to you. Meet formally at his office and two days later here. You are in a quiet room. Wintry gloom shining in through the window. The door opens and two minute. Mr manson nice to see you again. Glad you could make good to see you again mr pinch. Oh please call me gifts. This other gentleman is james. R garfield director of the bureau of corporations at the department of commerce and labor and the son of our late president. I may add. He shares our interest in the hetch. Hetchy project nice to meet you. Mr garfield garfield greece you and sit on a couch along. The wall control moves back behind his desk. So mr manson. What can you tell me about this. Damn as i said the other night our intention is to build a reservoir in the valley of hetch hetchy you see the water supply. There is incredibly pure. We could build water reserves for our entire city by simply constructing this one reservoir but we can't move forward without approval. Have you reached out to ethan hitchcock. He's the secretary of the interior. Yes the previous mayor. Mr phelan as applied to mr hitchcock several times. But he's denied us denied on what grounds he feels that because yosemite national park. There shouldn't be a damn leans back in his chair and strokes his chin thoughtfully. Well now. that's an interesting argument. There are plenty of people who would agree with him. John muir for one yes john. Muir has made his feelings on the matter known to mayor phelan. He thinks there are other places that could do just as well. Isn't that it have. You looked into some of these other locations we have sir but none are so pure or so practical has hetch hetchy. We could buy land cheaply there since it's by the government so it's mainly financial consideration. Well no not exclusively in fact. I've got a letter from your right here. That says the scheme for securing these water rights is as full of graft as any of the lumber company's plans to obtain big blocks of the best timberland. Is that true. Mr manson your throne. You had hoped this would be a friendlier meeting but you gather your thoughts and respond not to my knowledge sir. I'm an engineer. I leave the politicking to other people and yet here. You are in my office in washington making your appeal. You're starting to feel a bit warm. You stand mr pinto. I'm sorry if i've inconvenienced to you. I think i'd better go. But can show has a twinkle in his eye. Sit down. Mr manson. John muir and i are old friends. I happen to disagree with him on this matter. You feel your blood pressure. Drop abandoning sit back down. But if you're going to pursue this plan you better be prepared for one hell of a fight. Now you say the plan for the dam are solid quite solid sir. Then i suggest you proceed. But we've tried sir secretary. Hitchcock won't give his approval pinto looks meaningfully at garfield. Hunan's you leave that to me. You see james. And i serve as informal advisers to the president. We have zere and he's always happy to hear our input. Isn't that right. James garfield nods again hitchcock has been bucking the president since we first got into office if he keeps at him he won't be in his job long now. I think president roosevelt would be very interested in your plans for hetchy. Show did just what he said he would. He introduce manson to president roosevelt and permitted the engineer to lay out the plans for the reservoir firsthand. Roosevelt was impressed. Manson left e. c. Believing that if the city were to push again to dam hetch hetchy. This time the federal government would approve but city politics were working against him. Manson was no longer part of the administration. A new party was in power. And after james phelan left office his successor mayor. Handsome jeans schmitz. Let the plans for the water. Reservoir fall to the wayside until the great disaster on april eighteen. Nineteen o six. The earthquake changed everything three hundred water. Mains were damaged during the shaking leaving water gushing out of broken cast iron pipes while firehoses went dry. The public blame the spring valley water company for the failure of infrastructure advocates. For the damn saw the perfect moment to pounce only a steady supply of freshwater could avoid another similar disaster argued. San francisco was built on a bay. But saltwater couldn't be used to fight fires and emergency since it corrodes machinery perhaps. If the dan had been built before the disaster it's backers argued the city would have had the water reserves in needed. In truth it was water distribution pipes hydrants and spigots not the water supply that had caused the devastation but the supporters of the damn were persuasive and they use the crisis to galvanize public support. Still the project could not move forward without an official go ahead from the federal government ethan. Hitchcock who previously denied plans for the dam was still secretary of the interior and appeared to have no change of opinion on the matter then. Six weeks after the earthquake engineer martin manson received a letter. It was from pinch. Oh the note read. I hope sincerely that. In the regeneration of san francisco it's people will be able to make provision for water supply from the yosemite national park which will probably be equal to any in the world. I will stand ready to render any assistance which lies in my power. It was an intriguing letter but it still wasn't an official approval. The hetch hetchy leaders were grateful for the show of support but with hitchcock still position. As gatekeeper the appeared there was little chance of getting the project to move forward. What back in washington. The political machine was working against hitchcock within the white house. It was clear that the interior secretary and the president did not see eye to eye. Chief architect of that realization was gifford pinch show roosevelt's right hand man and someone john muir at once considered a close friend and protege but those days had long since passed instead the dan proposal with pit. Two of america's most important environmental minds can show him. You're against each other in a battle to decide the fate of hetch hetchy american history tellers sponsored by simplisafe. There's big news from my favorite home. Security company simplisafe. Just launched their new wireless outdoor security camera simplisafe system that. Us news and world report names the best home security system of twenty twenty. One just got even better. This brand new outdoor security system is engineered with all the advanced hacking security features. You'd want and need to help keep you and your family safe. It's ultra-wide one hundred. 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New york he then spent the next few years making loose change film documenting his personal nine eleven conspiracy theories then he started passing it around one. Dvd at a time and watched in awe and then horror has his theory spread across the globe. Fueling even more conspiracies impeding dylan against a ground zero tour guide determined to bring him down. This is just one of the stories in nine twelve. The new podcast series from amazon music and pineapple street studios in each episode of nine twelve hosts dan burski tells stories of characters whose lives would never be the same after september eleventh and through them we begin to realize that there are new lessons to be learned that we might just have enough distance from nine eleven now to make sense of some of the things we could not understand before. Follow nine twelve wherever you get your podcast or you can binge all seven episodes right now on amazon music or with wonder he plus like his future boss. President theodore roosevelt pin show came from a well to do family the son of a pennsylvania lumber baron. He was surrounded by wealthy and influential people growing up. His parents took pains to teach him the art of political maneuvering. They saw it as an essential part of his education and can show excelled at this skill would serve him immensely. Once he eventually became the first chief forester of the united states for service as a young man can show demonstrated strong moral and religious convictions. He served as a class ican at yale where he graduated in eighteen eighty nine he even briefly considered a life in the ministry but one day. His father asked him a question that would change his life. How would you like to become a forester. Who was an odd question. Coming from a timber magnate but can show jumped at the suggestion at the time. Forestry as science and profession didn't yet exist in the united states so ponchos family sent him to europe for schooling. The swiss forestry system inspired him he said it brought together. All the qualities of pioneer public forrester must have to succeed in a country like ours practical skills in the woods. Business common sense and a close touch with public opinion. When he returned from europe pinto was troubled that no similar system existed in the united states. He would later write in his autobiography breaking new ground. Not a single acre of government state or private timber was under systematic force management anywhere the most richly timberg of all continents. The american people had no understanding of what forestry was or the bitter need for it and show set out not only to make the american public understand forestry but to ensure efficient productive and scientific use of the nation's forests and he was occasionally willing to bend the rules to serve those environmental ideals in eighteen. Ninety two he got his first job as a consulting forester for george. Vanderbilt's baltimore state eager to prove his mantra that it is not necessary to destroy a forest to make pay pinch. Oh cooked the books. He didn't factor his own salary or the cost of the land taxes into the estates accounting in order to make the venture seem profitable in reality. Pinto was operating at a loss later that year while visiting attractive land in the adirondacks with the vanderbilts pinch. Oh i met john muir. The two bonded immediately and spent several days hiking together mir was older and already a famous environmentalist. He founded the sierra club that same year pinto looked up to him as a mentor. He would later describe their meeting as the most pleasant trip. I have ever had in the woods grateful for their time together. Pinto later male muir hunting knife as a thank you that following summer pin chose parents invited me to a dinner party at their home in gramercy park. They were impressed by mira celebrity as a writer and founder of the sierra club. But they had alterior motives. They understood that connecting their son with moore would help boost. Pin chose budding forced or career. Moore was a hit regaling guests with tales of his days tramping through the west the night help cement moore and pinto's friendship in the coming years muir advised a younger man to set aside book. Learning the best way to learn about forests. He counseled was to spend time in them near. Call this getting rich and heroic reference to the fact. The pinch oh. The son of a timber. Tycoon had sacrificed wealth in order to devote himself to forestry and conservation three years later in eighteen ninety six. The two men took a three month long tour of the west with the national force commission. The commission's goal was survey twenty one million acres of land that had been set aside. His potential national forests by this time and chose political savvy was coming in handy and he had been appointed. The commission's youngest member muir had remained stubbornly independent. He was worried about appearing ethically compromised if he joined the commission together the pair height in montana oregon california arizona new mexico and colorado. The often broke away together to engage in hijinks camping and doing handstands on the edge of the grand canyon but despite their closeness cracks were beginning to emerge in their friendship driven by their differing views about environmental protection. Moore was an ardent preservationists. He believed that the best way to keep nature pristine was to close it off from the public. He often used religious language to make his point. Pin show on the other hand was more pragmatic. He wanted nature to be preserved but also used he felt four should be managed for the greatest good of the greatest number. In the long run his utilitarian philosophy aligned him squarely with teddy. Roosevelt's conservationist views some historians believe. Pinch oh and moore had their first falling out at seattle's rainier grand hotel in september eighteen ninety seven the to supposedly got in a heated argument over pinch supportive sheep grazing and national forests. But the real reason may have been the report that emerged the same year. Following the national forests commission survey muir along with the head of the commission wanted to close off the forests prevent development and have the us army patrol. Their borders pinch show on the other hand. Wanted to see the force regulated and administered through a civil service like the ones he'd seen in europe crucially. He wanted them to stay open to the public. The commission went with the first plan and show was livid. He thought the commission was making mistake but apart from threatening to write a minority report attacking his friends views. There was little. He could do the gulf widen between the two as pinto progress in his career by eighteen. Ninety eight pinch show had been named the head of the division of forestry under the department of agriculture here pinch would build a close relationship with theodore roosevelt. The president affectionately nicknamed pinto gif and later. Historians would refer to him as the crown prince of teddy roosevelt tennis court cabinet. They're upbringings and love of nature led to a close relationship built on shared ideals for both men those ideals included pudding nature and service of human needs or conservation through use can show wanted to use scientific methods to maximize efficiency and productivity. He liked to refer to forestry as tree farming explaining the purpose of forestry is to make the forest produce the largest possible amount of whatever crop or service will be the most useful and keep on producing it for generation after generation of men entries. A well handled farm gets more and more productive as the years pass so does a well handled forest. His friend moore. Meanwhile had come to believe that forestry and wilderness preservation were incompatible in nineteen o five the division of forestry was renamed the united states forestry service and pinch oh became the head of it all but he wanted control of the national parks as well. He had even proposed his idea to congress in nineteen. Oh four there was talk about creating a national park service but can show strongly oppose the suggestion in his view. A national park service was no more needed than to take on a cat as he would write a few years later. The first principle of conservation is development conservation proposes to secure a continuous and abundant supply of the necessaries of life which means a reasonable cost of living and business stability. It was a view that was strain his relationship with john. Muir to the breaking point by nineteen o five. The city of san francisco had made multiple failed attempts to gain approval to damn hetchy. Moore's opposition had turned the project into a political minefield and secretary of the interior ethan hitchcock sued steadfast against the dam but after the earthquake in nineteen oh six pin show recognized the administration now had precisely the sort of momentum needed to get the project back on track and push hitchcock out in november nineteen o six seven months after the san francisco earthquake martin manson now city engineer received another letter from pinch. Oh this one. Read my dear mr manson. I cannot of course attempt to forecast the action of the new secretary of interior on the san francisco watershed question but my advice to you is to assume that his attitude will be favorable and to make the necessary preparations to set the case before him. If the possibility of supply from the sierras is still open. You should i think by all means go ahead with the idea of getting it. The new secretary of the interior that pinch show was referring to was james garfield the other man sitting quietly in the room while manson and pinch discussed the damn a year prior garfield took office in march nineteen o seven months later that summer the city applied again for a permit moore was incensed by this turn of events in hopes of putting an end to the matter. He turned to the kindred spirit he had bonded with over three nights camping in yosemite back in nineteen zero three on april twenty first nineteen o eight mir seventieth birthday. He wrote a letter to his friend. President theodore roosevelt in the letter. He criticized the miserable dollar ish motives of the capless who wished to dam hetch hetchy in response. Roosevelt wrote my dear. Mr moore can show is rather favorable to the hetch hetchy plan. I have sent him your letter with a request for a report on it. I will do everything in my power to protect not only the yosemite which we have already protected but other similar great natural beauties of this country. But you must remember. That is out of the question permanently to protect them unless we have a certain degree of friendliness toward them on the part of the people of the state in which they are situated. Roosevelt and sided with pimco felt betrayed. He had been certain that if anyone would understand his opposition to hetch hetchy it would the president now the battle lines were on the one side or gifford concerto teddy roosevelt and ex mayor phelan pushing for a dam at hetchy on the other side. Were john muir. Ethan hitchcock and the sierra club who's official position despite internal disagreement was at hetchy needed to be preserved as it was in may nineteen o eight. As the roosevelt administration was entering. Its last year. Pinch show organized a white house conference on the conservation of natural resources. It was a chance for the country's leading voices in progressive conservation to discuss how to protect natural resources from exploitation and develop them for the public. Good muir was not invited two days before the conference opened on may eleventh nineteen thousand. Eight james garfield made his decision. He issued a permit allowing san francisco to begin work on construction of the hetch hetchy dam. It was a serious blow. It looked like defeat for john. Muir and the preservationists but the opposition movement was just getting started. Imagine it's a cool early spring morning in one thousand nine hundred eight you and your son. Gregory are finishing breakfast both leaf through the paper. Suddenly he snorts puts down his cup of coffee. Nearly sloshing it onto the table. Unbelievable ecu pardon that muira fool is still harping on this hetchy business. The people san francisco are yelling to flood the valley but merges seems to flood the magazines articles about how much he loves nature. It's such a shame how they're destroying that valley. Oh mother not you. To one of nature's rarest and most precious mountain mansions a break. You don't think it's important to protect beautiful places for the future. When your father was alive we took you to see some of them niagara falls for one. I seem to recall you liking it. That's different how you've never been to hitachi. I've never been there. We'll never go their mother. Let the people of san francisco decide what to do with their land. Speak for yourself. I hope to one day. See a place like hetch hetchy with my grandchildren. If i ever have grandchildren mother please well. It doesn't matter if you think. John muir is a sentimentalist. I do or anti progress. I do because my women's club. And i are already writing letters Mother don't be short-sighted gregory one day you'll thank me and if you ever find a wife she and your children will following garfield approval of the hetch hetchy project. You're and the water company created a nationwide media blitz to oppose the dam mir instructed edward t parsons director of the sierra club to target mountaineering clubs and particularly women's clubs in the campaign to save hetch. Hetchy he told parsons he wanted to stir up a storm of letters. Filling the senate chamber with the protesting leaves fathoms deep. The public debate was plastered over the pages of publications like harper's weekly and national geographic women's literary civic clubs jewish women's groups singing groups and self-improvement clubs all lobby congress in favor of preserving hetchy while dc in san francisco had embraced the conservationist movement. The rest of the nation took a decidedly preservationists attitude. Moore would not relent on hetchy through the remainder of the roosevelt administration. He and pinch oh dug in on opposite sides of the issue. What power is fickle. Thing and presidencies don't last forever in the battles to save hetchy that would worth four and against the preservations american history tellers sponsored by sleep number. If you've ever bought clothing. I know you have you know about sizing small medium large cetera. Higher up the scale you might get into numerical sizes like six eight or ten or thirty two or forty four going further. Still you get into made-to-measure were there are no sizes but exact inches and then at the very top of the range is bespoke completely custom fit. My bed is bespoke. Sleep number beds. Adjust from feather soft too supportive and firm and you can set each side to the perfect sleep number setting for both you and your partner. I think i found my sleep number at forty but my wife might prefer her side of our sleep number. Three sixty i ten smart bed a tad soft red thirty five sleepnumber smart beds not only unjust to your ideal firmness. But their sleep. Iq app tracks. How well you sleep. It measures your best sleep hours heart rate breathing and movement and you can use this data to improve your sleep because proven quality. Sleep is life changing sleep. Discover the sleep number three sixty smart bed special offers for a limited time only at sleepnumber stores or sleepnumber dot com slash tellers william. Taft took off his emaar. Ninety-nine nine like roosevelt. He was a republican but he represented the conservative wing of the party. in october. the new president decided to take a trip to yosemite like his predecessor to the chagrin san francisco politicians. It was announced that moore would serve as his guide. The san francisco call publishing editorial criticizing the choice in light of the debate over hetch hetchy no more competent conductor of a scenic expedition that region could be had but mr moore is hopelessly wrong on this most important question. He represents a group of noisy sentimentalists who would let the valuable resource of the valley. Lie fallow forever. Rather than an unimportant modification of its natural features should be made for the good of a population of a million people in that view mr moore's close attendants on the president is regarded with suspicion as the damn supporters feared. The trip was enough to turn taft against the project. Progress was halted as the administration suspended approval and ordered the city to investigate. Alternate sources of water incredibly. It seemed muir had once again been able to save his beloved hetch hetchy from destruction by speaking directly to the highest power in the country while tap support on hetchy worked in mir's favor the administration was overall a pro business. One taft secretary of the interior was richard ballinger. A man who became infamous when you decided to take three million acres of public lands set aside by the previous administration and sell it for private use. The move was a slap in the face to roosevelt's conservation legacy the following year in nineteen ten pin show publicly accused ballinger of colluding with private interest to line his pockets. He demanded congress make inquiries into balancers conduct and connections to the coal and water. Power industries in retaliation though. Taft had pinto fired from the forest service. Upon hearing pinto's dismissal moore wrote that he was sorry to see poor poncho running amok after doing so much. Good hopeful work from sound conservation going pell-mell to destruction on the wings of crazy inordinate ambition. Ballinger was officially cleared of wrongdoing by both the president and a sympathetic congress but by then public opinion had turned against him. And the taft administration. It was a win for the conservation movement but the damage was done. Their ally pinch show mir's longtime nemesis was out. The taft lost the next election. To woodrow wilson. The new president appointed franklin k lane as his interior secretary lane had been the city attorney for san francisco during the administration of james phelan. The mayor who had i push for damning hetch hetchy but days before wilson's inauguration tafs outgoing interior secretary ruled that the government would not approve the project without congressional approval. Move took the decision out of lanes hands and placed it before congress. A congressman from california lent his name to a bill. Granting san francisco the right to build a reservoir in the hetch hetchy valley it was called the raker act. Imagine it's fall of nineteen thirteen and you're walking back from an overpriced lounge to your office at the us capitol. it's been a year since your grandfather pulled. Some strings was able to get you a job. Clerking for the progressive republican senator miles poindexter from washington state. As you cross the street is your friend. Frank garner he's a clerk to but he worked for senator john raker of california afternoon. Frank don't give me that afternoon business. What your boss is. Still fighting us on the raker. Bill people are upset. They don't want the damn you guys don't give a damn about the damn cops out. This isn't the first time we've been on opposite sides of an issue. I grew up in san francisco. I was there during the earthquake. My home burned down but even before then the water company even used to barge into my parents house to make sure we weren't stealing water we were treated like criminals would gouge by feves for water. You catch yourself. Frank is usually so put together. You never expected him to get so worked up about a hole in the national park frank. I'm sorry i didn't realize this was such a sensitive subject every day. We're inundated with letters from john. Muir's latkes calling us monsters but we're trying to help our city the only way we know how but the people aren't saying don't build the damn they're saying build it elsewhere. Poindexter says you have other options macleod. Or ill river. Those can't give us the quantity or the purity we need. Why are you in so many other still fighting us. You're not the only ones getting letters from john. Muir's people frank. Well it just seems that the farther away from san francisco you go the more people hate the idea of the dam but none of them are people that will ever see the hatch valley anyway. Does that make it any less of a tragedy. Frank looks annoyed again. He leans in. We're going to win this. You know that right well. I'm sure you are but if we don't fight it our own constituents are gonna turn on poindexter. And i have every intention of staying in dc in the run-up to the congressional vote on the raker bill. Public debate reached a fever. Pitch the independent. A weekly magazine based in new york argued yours not a shadow. Excuse for this vandalism unless our national parks are to be held subject demand by the nearest greedy municipality that wants to profit by the nation's foresight meanwhile the san francisco bulletin printed a story calling the bill's opponents a crowd of nature lovers and fakers who are waging sentimental campaign to preserve the hetch hetchy valley as a public playground a purpose for which it is never been used. Representatives from both sides made speeches on the floors of congress can show testified from the standpoint of enjoyment of beauty and the greatest good to the greatest number they will be conserved by the passage of this bill and there will be a great deal. More use of the beauty of the park than there is now when asked whether he was familiar with moore and his objections. Pinch replied yes sir. I know him very well. He is an old and very good friend of mine. I've never been able to agree with him and his attitude toward the sierras. In this case. I think he has unduly given away to beauty as against use. The debate kept the issue in front of the american public up until the last minute. I still think we can win. John muir wrote in november adding. I'll be relieved when it settled for. It's killing me. Mirror himself was too ill to attend the hearings. On december second nineteen thirteen. Congress passed the raker act. Forty three to twenty five president. Wilson signed the bill two weeks later. The elderly muir was devastated. He wrote to his friends. The kellogg's it's hard to bear. It goes to my very heart. But in spite of satan and company some sort of compensation must surely come out of even this dark damn damn damnation. Having lost his final battle mirror never truly recovered the year. After the hetch hetchy bill passed mir came down with pneumonia with his daughter at his bedside. He died on christmas eve. Nineteen fourteen mirror would leave a legacy as a free thinker and activist and patron saint of the american wilderness and for some as misguided zealot for him the fight to preserve hetchy was about much more than the future of one splendid valley as he told the sierra club in an address years earlier. The battle for conservation will go on endlessly. It is part of the universal battle between right and wrong five years after. Moore's death in one thousand nine hundred nine engineers began working to flood the hetchy valley. The dam would eventually be named after its lead engineer. Michael o'shaughnessy construction would take another four years but once completed the dam would hold a capacity of three hundred sixty thousand acre feet. The valley floor muir loved so much now lay under three hundred feet of one of the purest water supplies in california. It would take another decade before. The dam was fully functional but in nineteen thirty four. The first trickles water from the hetch hetchy valley began flowing from san francisco taps while muir and the sierra club lost the battle over hetchy its destruction. We've become an enduring battlecry for preservationists if a valley in yosemite could be destroyed. They argued was any national park safe. From harmful government intervention. The dam would not be the last time. The government exerted its control of the land and wildlife that roam through national parks. What was becoming clear. The country needed something else. A single organization whose job it would be to defend and protect the parks n- organization that would fight for the parks for generations to come on the next episode of american history tellers. A millionaire marketing genius promotes national parks as a vacation spot for all americans and a lack of understanding for predators place in the circle of life almost drives the federal government into hunting wolves into extinction from wondering this episode four of national parks for american. History tellers if you like our show. Please give a five star rating and review. Be sure to tell your friends. I also have two other podcasting nightline american scandal and business. Movers follow on apple. Podcasts amazon music. Or wherever listening. Right now or you can listen. To new episodes early an ad free by subscribing to one replace apple podcasts or the wondering you also find some links and offers from our sponsors and the episode notes. Supporting them helps us. Keep offering our shows for free another way. You can support the show by filling out a small survey at wondering dot com slash serving. You can also find us and me on twitter and facebook. Follow the show at ah tellers. And i'm at lindsey graham lindsey with a midland schlink and thank you take american history. Tellers hosted edited and produced by me. Lindsey graham for airship audio production by derek. Barron's this episode is written by. Jared palmer edited and produced by january pacman produced by george lavender. Our senior producer is andy. Hermit are executive producers. Jenny lower beckmann and marshal. Louis for wondering on the internet. You can anyone. Some people use that power to become who they wish they were but what happens when they're little lies harm other people what happens when online dishonesty leads to real life trauma. Mtv in wondering present catfish the podcast hosted by award winning. Filmmaker nieve shulman. This podcast takes you inside stories of people who use the internet to become someone else. Catfish the podcast exposes the truth and lies of online dating with catfish the podcast. You'll learn when someone seems too good to be true. The usually are catfish. Is available now on apple podcasts. Amazon music or wherever you listen. You can listen ad free by subscribing to wondering plus in apple podcasts or the wonder e app.
Franken Nerd Episode 27
"And what about just like everybody. Oh hello comparable. We're just sued by disney. Hello everyone welcome to franken nerd. Our weekly podcast where we go over our pop and nerd culture. News shows. movies whatever's trending in today's world. I'm your host april and as always. I'm joined by my best friend. Emiko host chased. What up. hello how's it going. How would you eat. It was good. I'm a little tired today. But that's okay but it was not a bad week. I had a short workweek. How was your week another busy week. Nother man. I'd already a week ago that we did this. That's why you reminding me today. About the podcast and i was like. Oh yeah that's the thing i was like. I wonder if he's going to even be able to do it Earlier in the week. I needed help with something and like then mode a colleague twenty bucks and was like. Hey man can you help me out lau And he he certainly did. I didn't have to do that or like you know. But i really appreciate it. This timed incentivized him. Oh actually i. I just ask you do. He said yes without in now. Those really cool. So that. I paid him but but did you watch anything new this week. We're able to like do anything besides work. I did watch vast nine. I rented you just wanna watch it on. Cnn over and over and over and over What a what a fun movie. But what if just realistic. They're basically basically avengers. I watching just fly lake. Don't they have like magnets her magnets. And it's like a bunch of potheads or dislike fucking magnets man and just like a whole like movie pot about it and john. Zena is vin diesels. Cousin or brother brother rather brother in the movie right when their kids. He's wearing like this cross necklace. And like that's how vin diesels character realizes like the bad guy is brothers because he he notices the necklace z. Has like consuming the same one that when see john cena's character as his brother. He's wearing the necklace sundays. Like really you're just your whole fucking life. You're wearing this necklace. Yes some people keep jewelry like that for all the time very gaudy this i across and he is wearing a suit with it over. It just was that was fun. Now's cool so did you like it. i did. I mean it's wow. It's ridiculous is rooted way. It's something that. I'm not going in while wondering like i wonder if this plots can be real this interstellar with christopher nolan. This isn't like i wonder if this is really. How is this is like a fucking. There's still a car there in the jungle. He's like you know what i need a dodge challenger hell yeah and You wouldn't have a jeep or something like no. I want to have a four door like fast car. And then the brothers in mustang. It's it's awesome. You just love it so bad in the movie. Yes and no like anything. That's out these days. It's like they'd all flips. They rewrote seen the movies. You see like the tokyo drift one. Yeah i've seen the tokyo drift. Han is in that. Yeah and then in the movie. They just rewrite him and it's like well secret. They usually difficult. Mr nobody someone else. Forget dead here. They are hal. It's just like awesome you can. You can just rewrite anything. You want what i've learned is a little way. Hollywood babysitting have to make sense. I mean speaking of. I don't know if this is true or not but i felt like I was sent something that like their disney is going to like cut ties with scarlett johansson. We do we talk about that last week. No we talked about like the issue with him. But i did see that. Yeah i don't know if it's real or not. You've i don't know if it's like confirmed confirmed but it's possible that's what i was thinking about it. I was like man. They could've re brought her back into the series but now with all this like suing stuff. I think they're just going to be like she dead. She's dead and not coming back. The end will now. We're getting into all these like multiple universes and stuff like they're totally could have been a place for totally for her and We may not have that now now and speaking of multi universes multi verses. We're gonna talk about what f today because we actually watched the first episode of it. What if what if which is basically what if you got the dot question mark. What if is basically like a cartoon. It's an animated series. And it's all about what other outcomes and multi versus could have happened with different characters. So we're gonna get into that a little bit. But i i have a smidge of news smidge. Let's hear at britney spears. His dad has stepped down as her conservator. Wow he's like doing. He's taking the substance up down. Didn't enjoy being the most hated. Like man. I also saw video of her. Mom britney spears his mom and her sister and they were selling wrote in fields which is definitely an mlm company. They were on instagram. Live like selling it. A cue fuck in any ads. Were the inaugural trailer. They've i don't know what they were in. They just look like they're in a hotel room honestly. But i was just like man. Y'all are about to lose that. Britney spears money so you got to start selling something that infield. I've heard a bunch of crap about it's obviously a big mlm thing But the good news is that he's stepping down. Don't have that means she's going to have no one else. I think that there's somebody else replacing him. But i think she asked or like they were saying definitely not keva. We're the hell is that guy. Does he take care of his children. I need to know to do what. That's the main story. I also saw something wild wome. Not that wild okay. Do you remember the says. it was thirteen years ago. That travis barker was in an airplane crash. Do you remember that. Deal and four people died. He's really burned. So i guess he's never been on a plane sense. I think i kinda remember that. Yeah he went on a plane this weekend and went to mexico with courtney kardashian my little favourite couple right now and He wrote a plane which is a pretty huge deal from lake. All that happens. Yeah i can. I can see why he wouldn't want to be on one yet. I still so statistically safe though. I don't remember this. I remember the plane crash right. I remember people dying. It's eh the article i read. It said it left him with third-degree burns on sixty five percent of his body. He had multiple skin grafts surgeries while i was like i don't remember that i remember it. Fucking him up. But i remember in what capacity in that capacity. I mean that shit's from what i've heard pretty brutal like if i'm going back in time was probably because i wanted to see them live or something then that obviously derail that i yeah pretty nuts. Pretty he got on an airplane again but then again back on the horse buddy was like. How's he get anywhere. I mean like he had been touring. We drove across the country. We're both didn't fly out of the country. Obviously in the last thirteen years. I mean unless he went to mexico or canada. Yeah like international travel. i cool. I'm just going to be on this. Like container barge guide the six weeks. Yeah like. I don't understand how any of that would work. But i mean that's pretty wild. That's probably pretty accurate. Fear to have totally. i mean. I've admitted enough car accidents. That i would rather not drive honest. My god you've been in so many car accidents it's wild And then the last one. I have kind of a random weird things. Steamer horatio sanz guy. Do you burn identity. No but from. Snl obviously He has sexual assaults. Oh he's denying them immediately. And the girl i guess because he had a lawyer come out and speak to him as soon as it happened. He said this is completely false. The girl demanded seven and a half million dollars in exchange for silence. Trying to be. Hudson does not even have million dollar not so They're they're denying it automatically. I haven't heard anything else. I haven't heard any other women. Come forward doesn't mean obviously we have to take every allegation into consideration but yano they came out and said immediately that it's false so we'll have to see. Wow yeah i was trying to think of. Oh yeah like next. Bobby moynihan no look war. What i would be so depressed i would. I can't. I can't imagine i can't imagine like a lot of people but then it comes out and i'm like but then some people like marilyn manson seemed like kind of creep not really surprised on that. Sadly you just look at them. I mean this is. This is probably an unpopular opinion. But like come on if you're a check and you're looking at him and you know. Are you going to be really surprised shit. Should you be surprised. I figured you'd probably get him some weird shit. Yeah yeah he. He got some really pretty girls though man. Yes what Who am i thinking of. That's the really popular ones something. Vaughn something gandhi swells. now i'm thinking of The chick from jaw breaker I'm thinking rachel mcadams which is not right Lond every trial would her too but no the one. That's really popular. oh jimmy. He dated her and she was at the vm. As and she was wearing a sheer naked dress i remember. Oh my god this is gonna drive me so crazy that i have to look it up didn't didn't I fucking remember her name Johnny depp didn't that schick also date him amber heard or no. I'll meet i dunno. She's a piece of shit so probably ever heard shitty horrible person. This okay marilyn manson d- Past past past relationships. There we go. I'm like what do i. What do i google when i'm looking this up past relationships. Yvonne teas rose mcgowan then. That's the one. Wow oh my god. They did it for so long. The that's the one. I remember the most and she went to the vm. As and she was wearing like literally nothing underneath address and it was just sheer black dress that she is such like Like a humans rights feminine amount after all those allegations came out. And she's like yep they're all right. Wow okay. I that wasn't prepared for that. One yep so that's a look not so great for mr manson We yeah so. I would be pretty. Sad about horatio sanz. I don't think so. I mean i hope none. I'm assuming random after i mean it's not even like as you've been in anything lately but now. Oh that's why that sugar and snow weird. He does not have so ninety landed whose name she might have like hooked up with him and then just decided to use it yeah. That's really judgmental and harsh. This is just a we know for a fact of lying bitch. Nellie is perfect. We i this for a fact. No i'm just saying it's very possible that people can get taken advantage of in any situation whether they're celebrity whether they're normal person vice versa. Ducks welcome to welcome to world. Welcome to the living. It's i mean that's one angle with like that's the the opposite of the thing about being a politician is like yes. You probably do want to be like having another person in a room at all times kind of a thing. Weird fucking weird to think about. But it's like you have no idea unless you always like on video camera. It's like can you imagine like doctors and stuff like okay like like if you go to the obgyn as a woman. Doctor is a guy like not. I'm a little side tangent. I watched a note. Soaping bosses bad bosses or a horrible bosses. Horrible bosses so watch that jennifer aniston is sexual predator. Land charlie will. What's his real name of the movie. I it's always sunny in philadelphia and she's always. Have you not seen that movie before now. I don't remember all my god. I remember when i first saw that movie. I was working at a job that i did not like. My boss was horrible. And i was like. This movie is so accurate like this movie is. We do sometimes wish our bought just disappear forever. Yes she's sexually harassing him and he's like no my wife would never he's like she's threatening to tell his wife in any yeah if they don't hook up there's like oh by the way pulls out her phone with these pictures of doing under when he was on her and she just like like i forget she didn't like bra lingerie and she's like i'm gonna show these to your i what i was passed out for these remember when they're explaining their situations like why their bosses are so horrible and they're like yours just sounds not so bad what and then. What is it jason's today. Because i want to go hook up with her or does hook up with her. Oh my god. She's just eating all like hot dog shaped items. What i've been outta jason bateman care to watch. That movie is so funny. Like when they are trying to get intel. Oh and then like what colin farrell's his shitty boss. yeah Just the worst. Nancy kevin spacey's like Not too from like a boss. I have worked with have been working for. I don't know out should really phrase at yeah but like just. Yeah kevin spacey in. That movie is wild. That whole movie is wild. It's so funny. And jamie fox is really funny and it would go to the bar. And the other fucker. That's your name it's motherfucker. Who's that jason bateman. Oh yeah. I'm thinking is jason bateman andrew. Bogusch oh god. They're both jason silk. But i love jason bateman right. That's the one that's from russia development. Dark yeah yeah ozark. I love him. He's so funny. I i listen to that. Podcast like every every monday morning. I'm excited for like a new smart lewis. Check it out. Yeah i know those movies are really good. There's two of them. i am pretty sure. There's two of them. I think you're right. And i can guarantee i've not seen the second one so i have. I don't remember all we on the agenda number. One is just fantastic. Everyone should see number. One agree on so funny That's all my news talk. That's all that was like. My main things bunt liking get into the story. Of what. If i so. I didn't do a breakdown of the year of the episode. We're not gonna do that for this series. It's kind of like a. It's it would be so much it's because it's such a multi verse like it's just going to spiral out of control but this episode the first one. Starting off with peggy carter. Yes but i felt something wrong. I'm so he. Bg now are. I still sleep with the lights on. Slits us admit that's all our listeners. God i mean we've just been having problems. Were neighbors now so we can just tell people buying. Yeah yeah we did. I tell you that the neighbor was moving furniture and they just had like trash pasig over. Your husband told me that. Yeah probably they know they have fucking roaches. Nick they come out at night fuckers. Yeah keep it daylight in my house all the time now on just the worst So this series starts off with piggy carter and she's with Captain broaders aka. Not captain steve rogers and you can tell. It's like similar to the first captain america right. They're doing same kind of a little bit of like same talk. Yeah it's it's this is all animated right now. So let's like where they're at the point where they're about to ski. Rogers becomes captain. America like that machine. That the fucking does it. With with howard stark. And everything just like it starts there d- recognize the narrator of the show. I did so. I was really happy. I have followed by jeffrey right for longtime twitter. Shoes fan of him and the moment he started talking i was like. That's fucking jeffrey right. And then i looked it up. That's his name. His name from westworld. Totally hungry aims song on. Yeah so he. He just hasn't end. He's going to be in the new batman right. Yeah yeah So i was like when i was listening to the opening. I was like that guy. I know it. There's another voice to immediately recognized. Also say general. Flynn o or whatever. The fuck is the plan and i was like dude. That's the bad guy from billy madison. I still know his name mike. That's him looked at michael bradley whitford. Yeah he's one of my favorite movies that cabinet in the woods movie. That's right. i love that movie. So the main thing that the narrator says it's like this is why this versus different. It's like right when she's like stay and watch because she had went up to the box in captain america the movie. And she's like. I'll just stay right here and something goes array and steve. Rogers can't do it and so she ends up like hopping in. It's like following with the same plot of the first captain america movie but obviously that was a change that occurred and she's now a super soldier so out she had the serum and saved steve rogers and so he's still this frail little boy or whatever you know yeah and as soon as i saw it happen i was like i said to my husband i was like all like oh all the men are going to be pissed off now because a woman is the super soldier then it cuts to the next thing he was like oh woman now this is not what we wanted to know exactly sixty million dollars wasted and she's like well i'm still a super soldier he's like waste he's like your trash he's bazeley basically treated her like she's trashed mike but i mean that's also like that time that era like women were meant to kind of cook and clean and look good the end to i wanna perfect our happy life so She becomes the super soldier. Steve rogers does not. But there's a little bit more plot twist in here like So obviously pay. Carter is her actual voice the same one that did it before you. Sa- bash. stan is in it. He's doing his actual voice. But chris evans is not in it. I was disappointed when i saw the credits in it was some other guy. Ah figurative much but like okay. seven says he's done now. I don't know like i'm talking to him personally. You'd like chris and he was just like i'm just done right now. He's like i'm fucking over. I don't you know my contracts up. I'm done But he's not his voice be. Hopefully everyone else went whole team. Yeah yeah like kept america's team when they were fighting like all guy that's it the one that voiced not the original original one right because the original original from the movie is a different guy. She morton's are known about him You're right you're on the right track. Who's in the matrix. Yes so He didn't wanna do it again. So then it was the guy that was in like endgame game and all that it's him But i mean this whole series. Seems a little intriguing lake. She has some actions. There's like so many similarities that they do. That's like Parallel to like steve rogers right like when she's punching the punching bag and it flies off. That's exactly what he did when he came out of ice When she hits the weight up with her foot and she like grabs it and throws it like a shield and then go on a couple of things of like the couple of references of like the. Save the dance that whole thing but like perverse reversed and she's like a giant and she grew like several inches. That's the first thing that He said member he is. I feel taller. And she's like and the guy was like you don't need to worry about wearing heels anymore And then like she does go on like a whole fight scene you know. She's wearing a totally different outfit. Has the british flag. Yeah so that was one thing like in the shield itself has center had like the union jack as well as her outfit so interesting. That was wild. That was really different for me. And then They're basically stopping like something with hydra right It's like some monster thing like with like little tentacles or whatever yeah so with red skull acid right so let's goal is trying to bring the his champion like hydra champion army or whatever from another dimension to earth. Yeah and with a the test rack with the test wreck so in. I know and then captain rogers is like i ran a man and then there's that so steve. Rogers is now basically iron man in the iron man suit. Looks like the very first one that made but this is howard making it not tony. Yeah target with the that's Interesting like what a wild wild thing. April's yawning everybody so sleepy. We're so excited to talk about this. I'm it's not that i'm not excited. I'm just a him. i haven't. I haven't slept this little like broken up and so long i've gone to are like i've only slept five hours but at least it was together like i just didn't sleep consecutive at all. So they're napping catnap. Can't it'd be like a twenty five minute nap today. On nice nice. I went to the gym with a timer. I went to the gym. I didn't do that I went to the gym to the driving range. Dasa jim no Oh i liked The parallel between when they go till the train which is obviously like similar scene and she pulls up bucky from falling off the train. And he's like. Oh my god you almost from my arm off Didn't catch that really another part. I caught the the the train like instead of bucky falling. It was steve rogers following. Yeah he said you almost ripped my arm off and i was like collector and then yeah obviously steve rogers falls. And that's like the difference. I was like i. My note was like did steed die but quote died like mine was like is he going to be winter soldier. I was like going down that route. But then he can't be iron ironman and winter soldier like this is wild And then i feel like i'm the it was kind of it was it was a fast episode. You know they're trying to get that squid thing. Whatever the hell that is octopus out of the realm and peggy has to like sacrifice yourself. Yeah what that's this liquid. Captain did yep and you and it's and it ends like the same like she comes out the other way ancient through the portal or whatever And then what happens samuel. So yeah it. Basically opens up to where like in the first avengers movie with samuel jackson and our fury and hawkeye like working on something with tesseract and she walks right through like we're lucky did and kind of going like well. What happens in that was several years ago. Yeah the war ended so interesting. Yeah what do we call her. She's not female. Captain america she kathleen. She goes after her captain. Rogers captain carter okay. She's just captain carter. Okay so i didn't know if like this had any tie-ins with like no captain england or captain britain or something like in the comics. I mean probably. I don't know where steve he would know. My husband not steve. Rogers steve rogers. Many stupid steve's in comic yes in comic series. So buggies character. When i look at him. This animation of him He looks like chris heinz to me. I saw chris pines looking at that character. Yeah respond as attractive. The pine pine yeah not plural. But you're like saying ads like chris pines. Look i yeah like. Yeah well yeah. It looks like smashing bashing stan steve. Rogers looked bit. A little bit you know. And he's like skinny and even says like something like the cute thing is that even though he was still skinny she still liked him so she obviously wasn't into him for just being like a buffet dare She liked him for who he was. And then Everyone else looked pretty much. The same right like to their characters even had a the little german smart guy. yeah Can remember his character but like the that was voiced by the same guy. You can totally tell and then it ends in that so like this is the thing about the series like are they all going to tie into each other. Are they all going to be separate episode. Are they going to be all separate stories. Like i don't know so i have. I have no idea where this is going. I kind of did you know that it existed right prior to yet to today parts today. You didn't know that this was a thing or do not. Oh okay So i don't think they're gonna have like i mean to me. I don't think they're going to have effect on the universities. I don't think so. But i think they're all like what if i guess is a comic series so like is this going to be following like pegging like this is her no. I think every episode is going to be different so okay like black mirror so so yes so like when you saw the trailer of it i mean there's a part where like you know the scene. Where like all the vendors are fighting in new york city. It's the guardians of the galaxy. Instead oh and then there's a part where They're all exemplified like they're all zombie avengers. And then there's a i saw one wear. Black panther is working with someone else. Star lord joaqu panther and star. Laura team was rocket. uh-huh. I don't know but i guess i also i'm i'm pretty sure. Chadwick bozeman recorded this before he passed. Yeah i saw that. He was Listen to the cast. yes so. That's pretty neat. That will hear his voice. But so yeah. It's going to be like a whole different. But i just don't know if like maybe in this series the storyline will tie in. I don't know it. It did have like the same marvel opening I saw march on my impersonation of it. I mean i just think that there's a lot of potential but there's also a lot of potential for confusion. That's my only like the timeline craft is really just throws me for a loop. I can see why someone would be like. I'm not into it anymore. 'cause it's like confusing or it's just a hop in and go. No sorry you need to watch iron one and then the been ketchup and we were waiting for you. I i watched like an easter egg video of this and it just kind of like. It brought a bunch of stuff that i was like. I don't even. I can't even retain this. But because it's a lot of like comic book parallels they're saying that that bad octopus squid thing is like a main bad villain and i'm like oh. Are they really swinging towards us. Like suicide squad. Oh i better not be fucking. They're saying that's like a really bad guy in the comics. That little squid interesting so we'll have to see what did When i was watching this i was like i wonder if there's any parallels to agents of shield. Yeah well okay. No 'cause they went down like the whole like hydro rabbit hole in. They went to like another planet relics. Remember that plot okay. So the in that easter egg video. I watched there was like a parallel of like the i think. Name of the octopus squid thing but and then no the only other parallel. I've seen from ages of shoulders. The dark hold which is walker Scarlet which was reading. What's right but the whole theory. In that easter egg video i watched is that scarlet witch you know is destined to destroy the world. That's what that book said right. When agatha was reading it she was like you're destined to destroy world as we know in. Here's a strongest person and And i guess in the comics she releases like that bad thing that is supposed to destroy the universe. And that's what a bad villain in doctor strange's one of the main bad villains doctor strange okay. So it's possible. Who knows though. These are all theories. It's not so like each movie has like like this insurmountable. Bad guy like doctor. Strange had Fucking whatever the guy. Things name is where it's just like this cloud thing an international cloud or whatever they could like eat thing. I don't know you say doctor. Strange events to say that if i didn't yeah the bad guy in dr strateg- the doctor strange is mannequin that. Like the the thing that like what's your name will draw from the his his energy. It was a dimensional dimensional lights. Yes dohrmann dharma jerome door mom and mom you look it up but we're getting there. I was like wait. Hold on that this door. You could have liked his fuck in taken over the entire planet like it's and then now we have you know how is King gonna like so many things like who's more powerful than who and who. The fuck is the watcher. What is that. So jeffrey rights. Like the narrator. But he's supposed like the watcher and like that's how it starts off and it's like i don't interfere with anything is sit here and watch so like what the fuck are you. Who even cares if you this if you don't do anything. There is like a whole glimpse of the watchers in guardians of the galaxy. Remember when there was like a cameo of stanley and he's like standing and he's like sitting talking people in space and it just shows them like hopping from now limps of them. Okay that's the only time we've ever seen them seen them. Yeah have no idea. That's a whole nother. No no more stanley cameos. Unfortunately i remember when we did our marvel breakdown when we did the list of order of marvel movies in like Of like what. We liked the worst and what we like the best. We did like an old. I don't even know. I could probably trying to find that podcast. We can try to re post it but me my husband and my brother and sister-in-law did a whole like reading. We rated r. Marvel movies from worst to best and three one. I haven't had three one. I think iron three was last on all of our lists. Except hawk. Sept- i swear they'll tell me steve. I think steve put captain marvel as the worst actually. Don't mind that one. Oh i don't mind it either on. My brother was a bend. My love's brie larson a lot. So he was matt but like most of but then he had ironman three right after iron. Man three was on mine. My brother and my sister ause berry end but it when we did that We also raided our best our favorite stanley cameo okay. I remember which one i had chose. I remember because we like we were trying to re watch all the movies in order to do it and I think my brother had then. He had infinity war as his best. I had gardens galaxy one as my favourite. Okay yeah i think i did and then i can't remember what they were. I'd have to like. Listen i know. We talked about that. And i think i said doctor strange was my favorite. I don't really know where i say. I mean i still like that. But it's really hard to go against like your man or even captain america like fucking love those characters like the civil war. I really like civil war was really good. I think civil war was really high online and Thor ragnarok was really good movie. Yeah a religious thompson. I really tried to have like the nostalgic field. I think iran one is like obviously the reason why the whole franchise is what it is so that was really high up on my list. Come on over. Pots would have been killed like recast it or killed. I don't carry the one. I don't really care if you had to pick a least favorite part of marvel. Would it be gwyneth paltrow. Yeah sarah last. Name paul tro. Paltrow chanel how troll with again of again. After when paul true i think but yeah easily the i can think of the two worst moments. Definitively mind her. You'd like when she hopped into an iron man suit. I was absolute worse. And then when she got these weird powers for a second and then and then the whole female thing at the end of end game. That was probably almost almost ruined. That movie like by two least favorite things in the entire universe of marvel involves her both times. Oh my god. When i've seen sometimes tick talk like movie reactions of infinity or endgame and it shows her land in like open up her sue and like people were cheering. And i'm like are they cheering for this. What no calm down. That was not cool. Where people cheering. When we in the theater like i think they were. I think they when like it started. It was like very exciting when it started. I think they cheered. When i like when captain america had the hammer like cheering news worthy. Finally he's like i do. I won't dance straight about a murder him. Yeah and so. I think my brother had a really good point. He said infinity war he said one of the best entrances was for coming down with grew. It's like saving their asses like when they were getting fucked and he's just like that has the like that We can acts like an axe. There you go out and say hammer look which louder sharper hammer. Just as original could take his hammered with it no like when he lands with brew. And he's like this is my friend tree he's like i am groot he's like. I am steve rogers and so that whole that whole purpose. I have such a problem with infinity war because it ends so sad that i was like. That's that whole part is so and you love it right. You are if you're like. I agree with everything. Oh man on. How much chase loves banos. So many people do though. I've discovered that people love him. It's an interesting thought experiment. Yes the thought experiment. Being if we got rid of half of the population would it be better It's a it's a little dark but there are genuinely people who've probably believe that in a sense half of the population could go. So that's why it's a really dark idea. But it's an idea that works. That's really really evil because obviously if you are good in your heart you're going to think that that's obviously not right so chase. Unlike you other people will have been called sympathy and empathy. And they won't want to happen. I just yeah. But but i see so many stupid. Like lake Twitter boats and people being like your best wish that snap could just happened right about now. And i'm like oh my god like that's pretty bad so i did not like in infinity ward. When we first saw like 'cause we had to wait a year or whatever for the next one. Oh my god i remember when endgame when we saw okay when endgame started i was just straight depressed. 'cause remember it starts with black black black black-eyed what's his name blackhawk hawkeye but ronin or whatever i could not get that riled jeremy renner it starts with his family and remember. He's just like you and his family disappears. And i was like all they really did that. Oh yeah the they. They fought with him. Like this wasn't even fifty percent of people you'd think you'd have one kid left or something but nothing said your family dead. Nope you're one fifth is all you're gonna get. He's going to go on a rampage after that so like when endgame started i was like. Oh my god. This is going to be so depressing. Oh you're looking at like new york city you're seeing like the statue liberty and fucking like boats around it and just fucking nuts and that's how like it's been for five years. An ant man was like loss in quantum realm rain and the as so that whole movie is wild and the question is now with like all the multi maw multi versus like is all of that going to just get erased or is it still going to be a thing and everything else is going to stem after that. The thing that's weird like we don't know Did you watch the x. Men movies with like the new class and those ones. So i watched the first class. I so i watched. How like their whole thing. Got a race great. Yes yes so wonderful if they're gonna do something like that like first class was absolute. Garbage donnas trash. Jennifer lawrence is mystique is absolute garbage. Sorry nobody can do it. Like rebecca remain. No i agree with that mainstay. Amos ask but yeah I like i don't know the actor who plays Professor x. I don't remember his name. Oh then the new one yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah the british guy. Yup and same with meg malcolm Mcelroy mcnew michael mcevoy. I'm getting mexa because exploited by rory. Macaroni more macklemore. That's what it is. We'll go at that. It's a certain thing thrift shop or whatever but yeah because that extra. That's done now right. Make bev wrap that up. Yeah it'd be interesting what they do with that by bringing into the fantastic four now I mean there's just so much so this this series just handed off wave too far but this series has a lot of potential. We're gonna see a lot of different like what if stories of like what if You know guards the galaxy where like the real superheroes instead of avengers like. That's the kind of thing. I feel like it's gonna happen. Yeah what chris voice. Sure i'm sure it will. Yeah so now. I'm kind of understand that. Yeah what if what if this happened. Instead so like the different universes of different decisions had been made in one hundred percent say without hesitation that i would not have liked peggy carter as captain carter. I don't know. I was never liked her though drawn to her character. Ever i didn't watch and carter didn't care was not drawn to her status. Do they even do. The second season series did not make it. That actress on our name. do we don't pretty and she's not bad. I guess like this say no no. That's not that'd be worse. Blonde chick that was just in falcon and winter soldier. That turned out to be bad. What's her name she's her niece. She's peggy carter's niece right. I show her character to me has zero personality none zero none now. She's fucking druglord. Peggy carter is above her not far from her. That's how i feel Okay pig carter. This show had like jarvis was like a real person real character. Like real human Friends with like howard stark and stuff once so you might like it for that. Vision vision will visions awesome. Wanna vision is so good when they were showing me those little clip of easter eggs. I was like. I just wanna go back. Watch one of vision right now. It well so damn good. The whole the whole thing is so again. I could just watch it. Maybe i'll do that. Maybe i'll watch fast nine again. Maybe like three hours two hours and twenty minutes who stay too long too long. I have not been watching much. Just watched that weird. Hbo documentary for parameters. That's right no what you like a book to the book like an audio book a couple of days. Wow this one needed to do for work. Nice one of the stir. Well we even we so this episodes are really short for like what if which is great because we can just keep talking about these for now. we i know that crew wella is now on disney plus for free. So ever get a chance. We're gonna try to watch. I think we should jungle cruise like to watch too fun. Yeah they'll expire. I can watch that with oliver jumanji type thing totaling so If like we could watch that too but for right now we're gonna focus on. What if because it superlight super easy. You and i are both having busy schedules. I'm about to start school again. You're doing stuff for work so we're gonna try to keep it light for now until we have to fit in other things. 'cause there's gonna be lots of movies coming out I mean it's almost it's almost going to be september third weekend and we got to see Shung chee cianci. Shanxi is definitely one. I wanna go see in the theater. So that's going to be a we're talking about for sure and that's only a couple of weeks away. It's the weekend of my birthday. They must be thirty three while. You're old. I'm old so listen to our podcast before i die of age. That's how i that's what Well you guys it's short but sweet but we're gonna end this podcast on that note so please like and subscribe to our podcast was comments and you know helps the pod and follow us on instagram. Which is al franken underscore nerd and if you want to follow us on twitter at franken nerd. And if you wanna follow me on scrimmage atler crap l. aarp care epa. If you want to follow chase chase mcknight. You'll see lots of nudes on chases so not say for work We will talk to you guys. Next week bye bye.
The Great Gildersleeve 50-12-06 (385) Leroy's Laundry Business
"The graph foods got neighbors wanted Waterman, as the Great Gildersleeve. Great. Gildersleeve is brought to you each week by the kraft. Foods Company. Craft a name that for years has meant find Geez is the maker of the new craft deluxe slices of wonderful pasteurized process cheese. These slices are perfect. No dried edges no broken pieces because they are raft ride on the SPIC and span craft plant. You'll find craft is delicious, processed cheese and slices in need half pound packages in your grocer's Derek case eight big slices in every baggage tomorrow take home, some of these convenient packages and get acquainted with craft deluxe slices, the most delicious process Geez you ever tasted. Last night as the quiet hours smooth by the Great Gildersleeve and his family slept peacefully there. Well all except little nephew, Leroy, he lay wideawake. His mind were turning around and around. A little while they began to during faster. And faster. And then he got an idea. Now Morning Birdie, the housekeeper is in the kitchen, cooking breakfast and your comes Leroy. That learning. Yet I was the first down. What happened you better? Busy Day Humphry. Better took you shut in the not only fine you laughing? There Leroy. Yeah neat idea. Money for Christmas. Don't you? Go Bust in Oak net pete now that I. Shall guesses. Sure. Stores have people get so many beans on your? Guessed how much there isn't my piggyback. Ten Cents Get Are you going to do that. Everybody gets which is in north. The closest gets. Hundred guys get ten cents a guy. That's ten bucks. I gotTA thousand guys to get you. Never heard of a few like that. Yeah, and there's only two thousand. Me Me Wa. You are flicker that which you are your flicker. QUIT! Yes. What's in the Bank for ten? What makes? Morning my finding Leroy Bronco. After early. He's working on a big deal. Yeah, so. We'll have to work after a while he. Maybe gets here on my all stock. You will. I find out how to make money. It's easy I guess my. Ten cents a guest. On one period, and if I ten. Roy. Who just a minute you WANNA? Guess you know. All the Dizzy Idea I. Can't do that. It's not legal. Put you in jail. Certainly Poor Little Leroy. You thought you had everything figured out, didn't you? Yeah I was gotta get some money for Christmas. other ways plenty of them. I admire your ambition. Leroy, but let's try to think of something a little more practical. Deliver packages at. Drugstore I want to run around with aspirin? Business. Skiing link in the backyard. All I have to do a script. The hold on free. Leroy wants to go skating rink in the winter. All you have to do is go down to the river. I didn't think of that here smarter. I've had experience. And Get village where you're selling something, people need like bread and cheese. Something is necessarily look at me. been wanted everybody to have that. You Vet. Business and do all yourself get something. Everybody needs races right now I need a haircut. That takes training I was only illustrating appointee right, but you've got the right idea, and you keep added my. You'll think of something. Kina. Thank you. This lead you ever. All, head on your shoulders. You should have been a future. A Quick Clip right into the check image. Put up the quickest haircuts in town. My Electric Clippers got overdrive. E. Why? Come in this morning's fine, but I was pretty busy at the office had to wait until noon. A lot of water these days you bet. Relieve Roy. Drop see me this. What a salesman kit! Talk! The shirt right off back. He's in business picking up laundry. Yes. Some new APP and found call the million dollar laundry I gave more my shirt. At kids go get a commission. You laundry business all right either my advice. Yes, I'm get everybody needs to. Get the job, certainly not. He got it by himself. I simply advised him. A million dollar laundry is a big concern. Yards Floyd that shows you what a boy can do. His uncle gets behind it way that kids go and you're GONNA be way behind him. Roy The laundry king. But you got nothing to worry about commission when the kids are big laundry tycoon. Hill Vyas water from you. All right to be flying at all. I started I use a clever little ad his old until they taught him the principles of business. Yes, Sir I bought a Shampoo Commission Zhambu. Yeah, why not? If your nephew is going to be the head of a laundry onto the head behind the laundry head? Were expire. Imagine that. Leroy must have gone right out. This morning landed that job. Josie as ability. Is used to the as good advice behind him. The boy follows in the footsteps of the man. MAKES THEM PRETTY GOOD footsteps. Big I'll drop in and tell PD. L.! Can I do for the. Day. I haven't had lunch at PD. Sandwiches today. Baloney. Let's! Take a Baloney Sandwich. You ate it. Certainly I shouldn't i. I. Guess if you like this done. Can't figure out why people come in here to eat. Star. People get hungry. Restaurant. I don't know why I have sandwiches. Restaurants don't sell aspirin. P. This is delicious sandwich? I ever tasted. Why did you say all those terrible things about your who? Tank our Jimmy together. If I would good customer says it's bad, but if I had bad. Years Route. By the way if you heard about Leroy? Denial again this morning at eight in business. My idea. The boy wanted to make some money for Christmas. I coached him how to get started. Now beginning right now to give the boy the benefit of my experience. I hope around get work I. Did. A nice thing to do and you don't have to worry. Leroy doing just as I told. You're going to be exactly like he's. Thinking after you. You Bet working with the laundry has the water. Aweso. You know I never saw anybody. Four! Kick? Either wonderful. Says those things because he likes. Leroy. Rag in loaded with bundles. told me I got a business. I'm in lonely. Laundry Keno. Customers already mentioned Mr TV judge hookers. Good yeah any. Willingness The man who? You're doing fine here I'm getting really important people in town. How about you on? Business News Ed Lee Kenai after all. We're practically Biden. Bundle. Upstairs in the clothes. Can't come on you on. On that Cup, you're lucky. I have to go back to the. Tonight. You, let's say. Was Right you bought the shirt right off your back. Glad this days over. He was hot in the office. You'd be my on. Cover that spot in my shirt. No Little Leroy getting long with a new job. How could he? Allegedly right Oh, he's here good. Have you heard about the laundry? Marjorie I practically suggested remember this morning when Leroy asked me for advice new suggested. Do the same thing Leroy. Needs, an older head to help him a lot allergy do. Brady. Just go out in the kitchen and ask Birdie. was going on around here. No bready where you? Leave out. It ain't what's up. Miss need is what down in debate. In the Basement Leroy. GUILTY ROLE! Yes, pretty what he's doing in that basement. Guilty nobody but. Tiny step on the basement Dole. million-dollar Laundry Leroy the president over. Doing debate in my washing machine washing machine. and. He threw an antibody watching in my washing machine. You already now. Let's look and see looking. Then Fuming I. was only. down. Soon the GOBI coming out win. Back. Let's look at this. Leroy's just a by. You'll have to admit it's a pretty clever idea. Winded wake more than one big started just this way. Maybe didn't go just right, but at least he's killing. Let's try to understand. That would often to be seen. Going on. I didn't know you're going to do this in the basement. Washing machine upstairs. Royal Lily turned out the stuck. saw. ME. Certainly not. You might be a little upset. They'll be. You have the right. Idea You took the bull by the horns and started your own business. That's what counts. Choice you'll to find some other way to do it. I'm not angry with you for this. No, Sir mckean! This might. Just like? And this proves. Got Your everybody's good for you. Is. He I don't know. Don't know. How you going to tell who they belonged? How you get the right Church back to the right people I can like. Mike. Gildersleeve, we'll be back in just a moment. Friends when you get crafty like slices, marvelous pasteurized process cheese slices. You're in for many delightful surprises first of all. When you open up one of these neat packages, you'll be amazed to find eight big slices each one as large as a slice of bread, and you'll notice to that there are no broken pieces or dried out edges, but now comes the most wonderful surprise of all your first taste of this fine cheese, notice that flavor at wonderful cheese, flavor that so unusually good, and the reason why craft deluxe slices tastes so good and are so perfectly formed is that there may differently for instead. Instead of being cut from a loaf like other sliced cheese, craft slices are formed by a new craft invention that captures all the fine process. Jeez, flavor into each perfectly form slacks, then wrapped and sealed in and span craft plan protected all the way to you, and of course one of the nicest things about this extra good tasting. Cheese is the convenience of the package. You can easily keep three or four varieties on hand all the time because these packages take up so little room in refrigerator, so be sure to look for them tomorrow and your groceries. Derek case convenient delicious craft. Deluxe license. Well, it seems Leroy's million dollar laundry has made a slight mistake. Plenty of shirts came into the laundry, but now there's a little problem of getting them back to the right people. In fact, it isn't a little problem at all. It's a mighty big win. The million dollar laundry has had the shirts over a week now and the president is in trouble. I didn't mean to get a mixed up I. Know You didn't mean to, but they are. You'll have to figure out some way to sort them out. You asked me. This is your laundry. It's your idea. I know light shirt looks like every other white chick in minor in there. Do you better think something Leroy you'd better think fast? No Sir Your Business Niro. You've got yourself into this mess now. Get yourself out I'm going for a walk. Boy Learn to watch. Zone. Not My. Would a mess. Pool A little kid. He's scared. Deserves to be scared doing good. kind of a mean trick though. Leaving him in trouble like that. You lose leave. Don't eat. I'm not being. As you are. Well, maybe I am. Lira. You lineup. We'll, figure out. Nation. That's all part of being a good businessman. My boy, there's no problem is too big. And we'll solve this one. Thank you. Straighten this out and dig. Yellow how? Leroy certainly John. Lewis is for you. Say He's wondering about shirt. I'll. Tell them on. Tell Him. I wouldn't even get that pile of shirts off the back porch, brother. Off. Out there on. Saturday ever get back into this. Telling me can have his shirts this afternoon lodge. Your. Phone. Hang up your whole goat. You haven't this afternoon. You can eat them for dinner goodbye. On. On. He'll get him back, won't you? had to tell the judge something. I don't know how we're ever going to sorta those Dan shirts well. Why don't you let the fellas come to the House and pick them out, then recognize. That's not a bad idea. Make a little party out of serve punch in cookie. Every man digs out his own shirts ride. Judge I knew I'd find a way out of this thing. Yeah No! Hello is. I've I know what you're calling about. You lost your shape. been wearing the same shirt for. USO like if you're? Going to be all right. I lost a little mix up Mr Mann. The markings got lost. We're having a little. Get together at my house this afternoon with refreshments. Come on over and pick out your shirt. Either one of those things can happen in the vested laundries. Taking jobs or don't you worry? Just come over this afternoon about five o'clock right? By. Doing. Get this things right now. On the world you all of using your head Michael. All settlement we'll all pitch in and iron them up neatly. To. Pick them up clever idea. Don't you think you mean GonNa come in and find on? Your. I'll pick out mind to be minor in there, you know. Nice Little Party It was funny. To be? Audit. You like that what happens when two men both decide on the same share. That couldn't happen it good. Have you ever been to a bargain sale you're it won't be like Patrick. Tan into them. Should Mitt guilty? You have a half of now. Them Poon Yang and you go have a half. Yoga. CACTUS at them on the table, thereby the punch and quitting them. Share sounds good is read them out there in the couch. Mighty the other joined the dining room table, holly cow. You did. Is Guilty. I'm already. Doing I'm taking the breakable Zada. The living room is going to be a happy here. I will save could. Well here they come on, I'll open the door. Roy Too much and come on. Good afternoon Mr, Manson I'm odd. I commissioner greetings wide. You're the first one here that's me. Come early, stay late. I figured I'd get a little ahead of time. Get the pick of the shirt. Lately Others Giddy you got the best one spotted already commission. Afternoon, Leroy I. and. Glad to see. You Bet. I'm glad you see my cherry. I judge baby. Hey at the chief was here. We get jolly boys. You judge we could've that. Certainly happy to see you villa taking this thing in a friendly spirit. You never can tell. I go out of here with better shirts and ahead before I didn't wear my glasses. Yard Hey we ought to draw straws to see who gets first crack at no eight if every man for himself. Brother maybe Birdie was right. them now I see who gets the best shake. Welcome thank you. You know all fellow has how do boys? Here, we all are all shared owners. In the same boat. You know so fellows. Look them over and find your. Let's get started. Out Now. Let's not get excited plenty for everyone. I know we all trust each other. Guys we, get. That looks like mine with the Pearl Button or one's mind, Hey! I found one like a game I. Found another shared. Overdo this. And you got one. They're afraid car. Hit another one, too. I got. I got three. This is the best party we ever had. Lloyd. Davison. That situation you hear did. Got Shirts back, and they had a fine dining decide. What a nice bunch of. US Eli. There was no squabbling. All work perfectly, not a single shirt lend. I noticed that on. Your shirt. Forgot all about that. They're all gone. Niki thing to do. Great Gildersleeve we'll be right back. Now you can please every member of your family with craft deluxe slices, because these slices of fine pasteurized process cheese that craft wraps eight to the package. Come in five delicious variety. There's wonderfully mellow craft, American craft American with the mentos added not sweet craft Swiss craft brick with that grand rich taste and sharp old English France get several half pound packages, so everyone can enjoy his favorite for quick snacks and sandwiches that are so easy to fix tomorrow. Look for them in your grocer's Derek as the five varieties of crafty luck slices of delicious process cheese. You give me four white chicks in size sixteen, thirty six. Wrap them just put them in a bag. That'd be seventy five. ELO judge. You. You have in the Bank I. Guess came from Vagary. It's full of dried red for my pigeons. Outside of here on the COM-. Together. Nice. Eight. Oh, my cookies drank. Oh, my punch! Somebody ran off with all my church. Probably you. Take my baggage beyond my way. You'd buy. I'll take my shirt. Shirts through. You got the wrong bag. Dry Bread. Roll, keep it. Received today you are the pigeon. The. Great deal. There's leave is way by. Goes is written by Paul West John. Elliott Anti White with by Robert. In the cast I Walter Tetley Mary off Lillian Randolph. Cube, Ryan Bentley Berar Earl Ross and Dick Legrand. This is John Huston fame. Or the fast food. Makers of the famous line of quality food products. Journalist next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the Great Gildersleeve. Do. WanNa, taste, something good well next time you make a cold meat sandwich. Don't forget to add a little craft prepared mustard, but when you add a little mustard, you add a lot of Tang. Every bite tastes better. Now you can get two kinds of kraft. Salad mustard delicately spiced for those who prefer milder flavor and craft mustard, snappy, ready added. Both kind them with every meet day, hot or cold. Just add a little mustard. You land on lot of Tang. CRAFF prepared mustard. or a half hour of spine, tingling excitement here the Falcon, every Sunday over the station. Check Your newspaper time of broadcast and listen next Sunday as the Falcons solves the case of the raw deal. Combat Madman Groucho Marx on NBC.
Episode 105: Sounds like something a murderer would say
"To Max. I'm an engineer and inventor and this thing here is the Bagel Tron two thousand bigotry. Two thousand is my invention. It opens up portal's dimensions of traveling through these dimensions or the last two years visiting all kinds of parallel earths where its earth but not earth may not are anyway. The point is it's been two whole years. I can hardly believe it two years that I've been traveling through these other dimensions recording US podcast for the benefit of humanity to advance the sciences. And you know what I'm trying to do good. I've kind of been questioning recently. Whether really complicating that goal met a Wilson recently who traveled from the future to tell me about how I ruined his life. So badly with my visit that I caused him to an island all of humanity. So that wasn't great. We avoided that I think. Exit Time Traveling Wilson. But it's got me thinking that there's definitely some things that I could have done better so I've gone back through some of the places that I've been over the last couple of years trying to find places where I can maybe fix things that might have messed up and right at the top of my list as this mansion. I visited his mansion a little over a year ago there was I think some sort of serial killer on the loose the version me in that dimension Max had been murdered by this guy and or or Gal I or I. I don't know I don't know what it was but it was apparently just killing people and all these people in this mansion have been dying and there's a whole group people there and okay. It's been over a year but is to be something that I can do. Maybe can at least go and check in with the police there. See if they've solved it. Give them any information that I have you know last time I just kinda ducked out of there and kind of shirked all the responsibility of what I had learned so I get the dial set. I'm going back there back to the mansion. I believe I never really got a name of like what it was called other than it was owned by a guy named Mr Mansion so Mr Mansions Mansion. I'm GonNa see if maybe I can straighten some things out. See if they caught the murderer and if not if I can maybe help them with this what would be pretty cold case at this point that about covers it. Let's go. Oh yeah okay. I can't forget about this. Hits the Freezer so should gosh. It's so cold in here now. Not The glow from the Porto. It is now pitch black in here. What happened to the light that was on in here? Last time was burn out. Where did I keep my flashlight? Which pocket it in Here it is what what? Oh no frozen Max is still in here man okay. He's not the only one we that. Oh No it's professor prunes fizzes banana and this Dodo. Miss Black Mr Tate. It looks like he was writing. Note it says sounds like something in murder would say. Well yeah I guess so okay. They're all dead boy. That does not feel great at all. All right. Well I I really feel like I need to go to the police now so we can out of this freezer. What are you doing here? You're you're you're you're live. Yeah okay why are you in the freezer? You may recall the last time you saw me. I opened up a portal and left to another dimension. Is that what he did? Remember that ring a Bell. Big Blue thing that would that was. Yeah that was a Porto back to my dimension portal and I just felt the need to come back here and try to apprehend killer will help the police with the information that I had because it kind of just left without sharing anything. I've really feel bad about that so I'm here to help. The police catch the murderer. Which at this point. I'm pretty much assuming as you. I'M GONNA have to Scrub the setup. Man Left breeze right there. It's one of the energy weapons that I picked up and one of the other dimensions. These she with that thing. I don't want to have to shoot you but I will. If you try to murder me like you did all the rest of those people in the freezer. I didn't murder them. I thought you murdered them. No why would I have murdered anyone? No I don't know why you're cable back judging. No I don't murder people. Listen okay last time around. Here's what happened. I popped into the freezer. There was dead Max. He was wearing the big foam hat. Said Butler on it. Big Cowboy hat is your hat. Why took a hat too? I could pretend to be him. Okay so no one would suspect that I wasn't from this dimension but obviously the murderer knew that I wasn't. You knew you yourself knew that you were not okay. Yes but I wasn't murderer again. Why would I come here and kill myself? No that wouldn't make any sense if you don't like yourself. I like myself just fine. Thank you do you like yourself enough to murder yourself. That makes no sense okay. We're not talking about me. We're talking about you and why they're back. They seem to be the only one not dead and in that freezer. Also you live here now. What's the deal? Yeah you're the chef. There's nobody even here to cook for anymore. So what are you even doing here to cook for myself right? Yeah but don't you have a home? Why don't you go home? I do have a home? This is my home now. What yeah see all over. Oh now that you mentioned that I do see you've written your name on what appears to be most of the walls. The counter the refrigerator stove the ceiling. Even yes part of my whole name. It and claim it. Yes I see well mission accomplished there I guess. Are you literally the only one left? Everyone that was here. Last time I was here seems to be in that freezer now dead. Okay all dead. So you're the only one left you've written your name all of this mansion rate and they're all dead yes so it seems pretty clear here who the murderer is right for saying? You're the murderer now. I'm not why would you hang out with dead bodies in the freezer? That's something I wasn't hanging out. I just got here I just I. I opened up my Puerto. Listen in my dimension where your freezer is. That's my garage. Lab is okay. It's just. That's where the portal opens up. I can't really control that. At least not yet wiser garage lab in Kitchen. It's not any look. Mit mentioned there is no mansion. Here all right. I live in a relatively modest house. It's got a garage. It's gotTA basement. It's got a second story and that's it. It's not a mansion like this with a conservatory and a bubble room. Jake Great Hall Yup and an enormous kitchen the pool. Now I don't have a Pool Jacuzzi. You're kind of roughing. Yeah Right which is probably why that gives you a motive to have killed all those people. You could get this house but you can't because name on it. Yeah I can see that very clearly the dozens and dozens of places that you've scrawled your name in to be Black Sharpie all over right everything. The best pen. Uh-huh but Again why would I come here and murder people? I have everything I need at my house back in my dimension. No I came here to right a wrong and that wrong is bringing you to justice as you are. Obviously the murderer killed all these people so you could claim this house. I didn't kill them. I have just been minding mile business cooking for them when they were still alive and getting them stuff like blueberries rights. Yeah the blueberries actually now that you mention it. It looked like their mouth was full of blueberries. Did you choke Mrs Banana? On a mouthful of blueberries. I didn't joke is banana either. Was murdered or was suicide. I'm leaning towards suicide. I think she just couldn't take it anymore. And she's wanted to end it all the best way that she knew possible. And that's just to drown our sorrows and blueberries that makes no sense also. How long ago did this happen? How long have you been living here alone? Last one was two weeks ago. Why were they still here? Surely everyone had homes to go to. Why would any of them been hanging out here? Especially if someone was murdering everyone in the building wanted time. I've kind of exciting. You know keeps your heart pumping you never know what's going to pop out a or looking around the corner. That is not the kind of excitement that I think I would be sticking around for anyway. You sure you didn't lock them all in and keep them from leaving. Somehow I don't think so. I mean I didn't intentionally do that. Uh-huh ah your stories not really holding up. You know what I'm getting my phone and see if I've signal here and no I doubt it doesn't you know there's do not have T. mobile here. T MOBILE ARE. They never mind okay. Where's the phone I'm calling the COPS The one phones over there. Okay the on the wall. Yep I see it you get a wind it up. Wait what minded I get a charge Just through seaver might children here really wanted to do it. Okay keep going. I should probably also tell you that it doesn't work okay. Of course it doesn't. I called the guy to come out here. And he got here and then he was murdered. How many burgers have there been in the years since I was here? That's a good question. He kind of lose track after like twelve. Why would you still be here if you weren't one murdering everyone? Aren't you afraid for your life at this point? Oh Yeah every morning every day. Then why are you still here? Let's life right. You could be out there just walking along and giant bird. Comes FLYING DOWN HITCHING HEAD? Bam debt or Coconut Rattles K. Right some of those things don't seem like they're quite as likely as being murdered in this mansion. Lino really I mean anything positive. If you want me to believe that you didn't murder these people the truth. What's your alibi murderer? It seems like you do not have one. I've been here the whole time right. I couldn't have done it if I did it. Would I run away? Wouldn't I hide the bodies in a better place than the kitchen freezer? How did the bodies get in the freezer? I put them there. Why why wouldn't you just go to? The police called the police. Why would you continue stacking bodies up in the freezer? Well one they get kind of smelly and some faster than you would actually anticipate thought there was like a little bit of a waiting period on that but man who Mr Prunes ripe quickly boy okay. Fine again though. Where are the authorities? Why haven't they come estimated? I called them. How did you do that if the only phone is broken no it was working it stuck working after the cop? What do you mean after the cop? The COP of making a call to supervisors bringing it back up and he was murdered. Of course sure an and the phone stop were Who but still. You just decided hanging out here. I think that is a good judge of character right there. That shows that you can't push me away from my job. If I say that I'm GonNa do this job. I'm going to do this job until I die. That is determination Right Chutzpah is what that is sure. Yeah so who do you work for Mr Manson? Who's right currently deceased? Yes I do you recall. He passed away sometime before my last visit right. Yeah he's getting a lot of freezer burn. He's been in our longtime so far back. I don't even see him through the very deep stack of body right toward the bottom of ood anyway. Getting chills again. You left the door open. That's why You keep frost tate at the bad idea. Okay I guess if I have to just march this mansion and to the police station myself I guess that's what I'm GonNa do. Why would you do? Are you gonNA turn yourself in because me a witness? I don't have anything to turn myself in four. I came back here to right a wrong. The fact that I knew that they were murders going on here and I did nothing about it and I've come back now to do something about it and that is turn yourself in to bring the murderer to justice which is obviously you as you are the only one left here so now you are also here right. I am now. I wasn't twenty minutes ago right but then to ago. You were here briefly. What what are you talking about murder? No I have not been back to. This mentioned in over a year might theory you're popping in and out and pop and people nope why would I do that? That makes no sense giggles. No bad childhood. I've been visiting so many other dimensions doing good things which is definitely not murder. Listen I saved a guy actually another version of you. I might point out from a where this weird. Ai had killed every single person on the planet through some sort of oral frequency thing that just caused their heads to blow up or something. I don't know the point is. He was the only one left and this creepy artificial intelligence was his haunting him everywhere and I saved him. I brought back. I brought him away from that dimension and I found a new place actually. I should probably check on him anyway. The point is I've been doing good stuff. I haven't been back. I don't really have a way to prove that you're just going to have to take my word for okay. You know that story. You know that that sounds like what it sounds like a murder. Say Okay a the most ridiculous story. I've heard all right. So you murdered Mr. Tate and stole his catchphrase. No he said I can have it. You know what you solved long enough taking you in wait wait let me just grab my things. What things did the closet all right? I'm going with you okay. Matter wait now. Are there any murder weapons in your so-called stuff? I mean that's a really great kind of question. I mean you could use anything to murder people You're not instilling me with a real strong sense of confidence that you're not the murderer. I'm not gonNA Murder Gay Man. I don't murder people. That sounds like something a murderer would say. Yeah that's true but still I'm not gonNA MARRY YOU. You're the one holding a gun at me or whatever vaporizing do thingy that is that. I'll use it to if you try like if crack a joke. Because she may not that no just get yourself a fact sheet such a pussy murder. I'm not a murderer book. What was that name? Is there somebody else here? Did you hear that that you know sound like it came from the kitchen that hassle? We need to go back in the kitchen. Fine though you I know you obviously I know you. You're me Wait this is really weird man. Also I'm just GONNA say this. I was bright. You are okay that guy that you. Maybe he has me. What are you doing here? You trying to muscle it on my capstone. What Tassone Right? That's where I remember you from with you guys in this together you at no. No no I know who this guy is. I haven't met him before but no I know where he's from your from that evil dimension with the university what was it Heidegger Heidegger University Haniger. That's where you're from. So what of course that's where I'm from again you? It must limit on my capstone. Here wait are you the Guy Guy with Bagel Toronto? That's how you're here. You get the You. Get bail trump. You caused me to fail my capstone project. I was supposed to go murder you and that I was going to graduate with honors go into solid career of evil accounting. But then you weren't there I to mention to kill you. There was just some stupid Bagel. Trump could figure out where you went. Yeah I was actually in your dementia. Yeah figured that out when I came back while like so are all Max's evil murderers who point gun thing. He's at people how this works. I'm not pointing the gun at M. I. Pointing at him right. He just got to murder somebody though. I didn't come here to murder. Anybody I did I definitely did was gonNA murder. That guy. Wilson is the last one of the list man. See not the murderer though. Okay I got it. You're not the murderer. Also Bagel Tron. Two thousand yes. Is that the thing that makes the perfect bagels. Because I've been wanting to get one of those four heather. Okay I've seen the INFOMERCIAL. They look amazing. Wait you have an actual Bagel two thousand here. That makes big okay. Listen My ron is the thing that opens up the the dimensions. I'm here but listen. This guy here came here to murder. You probably actually. He tried to murder me like ages ago. Oh so he's not good at it. Well I mean it seems like there's a freezer full of evidence to the contrary their rate. Yeah yeah why is it takes a long? Listen I've been working on this borough year and a half way to stretch that out. Do you like on the meter or something. The Union it was just going to be the one murder. Okay what's GonNa Murder Myself? This guy right here but he got out of it and then he came and he confused. Teddy and confused Wilson. You tip goatee. Not Able Sash pretended to be me and since I didn't murder him that failed me and I had to restart the capstone it. I had to make it ten times bigger so I'd find a new dimension to come murder Max myself and so. I chose this mansion because it was full of people that I could just keep coming back. And they made me stretch it out. It's part of the PENANCE. Repealing the first time I had to come back. Stretch out the murders over his long period of time as possible. And so it's been a year and a half and I make killing one person every month since then and you're the last one and I'm GonNa kill you and I'm going to finish my capstone project and live evily ever after so long story just to say that you not very good at killing people. Slow at it all of you once. If I wanted to okay that would have been great. No I'm just okay. That's it that I saw ninth come on and I'm GonNa stab you both right now. I always thought I was going to get the Piper and that it's GonNa be done. Oh no you're not. Do you not see that I have energy again. Pointing things fake. Obviously there's no such thing as an energy weapon. Oh there definitely is no no. They're definitely spray. If that hairdryer thing he's got. It's not a hairdryer. It's Disintegrated and if he actually kill us. I am going to have to disintegrate him. I don't want to. I'm not here to murder anybody Keep done yourself that buddy. I don't have to tell anybody. Listen he's got the knife I think he's going to actually try and do it. I'm going to do it. Why are you still talking? Did you sterilize? I mean like I'm not like the twenty fifth person to get stabbed by that. Have a thing about germs. It's just e to die by dirty just if you could write to clean it you did hear what dimension I from right. It's called the evil dimension right so no one in sterilize man. They keep getting worse and worse. I don't think we have a choice. I think we have to vaporize them we. I'm not vaporizing anybody. I'm here with you and your hairdryer and that dude with his crappy knife full of germs. This is not a crappy knife and you're about to feel it right now. Oh man wow. It's actually fired. That thing before vaporizing. Actually actually it. A cloud like dacas vapor item out at the moment and the whole room. We should leave the kitchen. I turn the other invent. Turn it on there goes. Oh okay. It's my sinuses. Who Oh boy well. That was terrifying so gross his knife. Drop to the ground great. You want to sterilize that and keep it as a memento of the fact that you didn't get murdered today right planning getting merge day also just a reminder. I'm not the murderer. Still not murder but you murderer. That's not murder when it's in self defense. He was coming at us with the night. He stated very clearly is intend to kill us. Great that was self defense shirt. But I still haven't killed anybody. You kill the process fine. I was wrong. You weren't the murderer which I am relieved about. Oh well that's nice. You really should call the authorities. Okay actually I'm not sure we. We did vaporize guy guys name through Porto okay. The authorities would probably think that you're the murderer too so I don't honestly know what you should do with all those bodies. I don't think you should leave them in the freezer. Should I put them in the giant furnished down in the basement Maybe I that doesn't sound great either. Use your discretion. Can I borrow your everything? I guess you know what. Maybe we should just do that. But great because I mean they're taking up a huge amount of space. I have no room for my frozen corn or blueberries or my Burrito specifically Britos. Just open the freezer. All right all right fire way their think tank. Okay thank you so much dust okay. I think you're going to need to severely disinfect. That freezer all settles deep clean. Yeah Rachel Deplane. Don't put any Buddhism there before you do that. Oh No my breathes boy. I'm that didn't feel great vaporizing event frozen corpses but we did. Stop the murderer that's true. We stopped evil. Max With his stupid Handlebar Moustache and a stupid evil sash and his smug Little Grin. We stopped great. Just think you know if you would come sooner. Maybe more people. Yes that's true that's true. I'm trying to think about the positives here. Okay Yeah I do feel bad about not coming sooner or I guess not doing more. The first time I came the thing is I couldn't come back right away. See because my portal didn't have the ability to go back to a specific dimension until somewhat recently so I chose not to come back. It's that I couldn't rate at least not for a while. Anyway the point is we stopped him. Yep Go team. This and other dimensions are safe. I don't know what evil accounting was or if it involved dimensional travel and further murderers but probably I dunno isn't all accounting evil. Yeah I guess it is kind of redundant all right anyway. Just a deep clean that freezer got it and I guess I have a nice life. Ya you to not dying in all right now. The mentioned is totally mind guests. It kind of is so enjoy. The mansion night will can go hang out of the bubble room. All right I will. I'm open quarterback up here. It is nothing like a Bagel. Well see right. Yeah come back anytime you want. Just don't shoot anymore people. I walked unless someone else from the evil dimension tries to follow up. Do they do that? I don't think they probably would i? It sounds like this was just sort of his thing. Great totally going to come. Tell me now I think you dump the murder would. I'm not I'm not a murder. Grey area right later. All right survived. I found the murderer stopped him. Oh I should shut the pool down student at a great starting off. I guess that was sort of mission accomplished did not actually make it to authorities not really sure how we would have extended that holding them anyway but I stopped evil dimension Max which was actually the fourth item on my list. Right here of places to go back to and do something about so awesome. Get to scratch off to a one. We go perfect. Excellent definitely. Don't feel great about vaporizing Max. But he obviously didn't give us my choice so I'm going to go. Burn all my clothes and dry this whole thing again in another week from the multi verse is produced by a starring. Scott trump as apparently not the murderer Wilson and Ellis as Max v Music by Evil D. Twenty global by Abe Schnitt. Follow us on twitter at dispatches. Fm support as patriotic and visit US online at dispatches dot net and you see this in like marvel movies and they never you just don't seem so much cleaner.
Season 10 Episode 20: All by myself
"The Dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating that the Huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex. On each episode, we'll talk to real daters about. From sex parties to sex droughts, date fails a diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves. I'm your host Yue Xu, former dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer Julie Krafchick as we explored this crazy dateable world. Hey, everyone, welcome to another episode of dateable a show all about modern dating. What a fascinating week! It's been with a lot of states opening up like fully opening up. Apparently L. A. went from zero to sixty overnight like I have friends who work at gyms there and last week they were being told to stay home probably won't open for a while and overnight. They got the notice that they were going back to work. Wow, I, just I feel like San. Francisco's Kinda still slow moving compared to other place. Yes, I've also seen like people post on like instagram and stuff and like people are. Are Hanging out in people's homes. A lot like I've seen from a few people in New York and I just feel like still not there yet. At least you aren't there, but everyone. I don't want to speak for everyone, but it was really nice to see you this week. That was really fun Yes for anybody who follow us on Instagram Julian I finally had a reunion after like three months of not seeing each other, we stayed six bar. We wore a mask. We were outside at a park. Super careful I. There were a lot of people out, but it's still felt somewhat say oh yes. We weren't really near anyone outside of the people we were with. No I guess it just depends on your tolerance level, but. I. That would that was fine with me. I'll. It was super. Nice. Seeing you I feel like. It feels like it was like ago. It was like a couple of days ago I. Don't know why time is going. So. Fast and slow at the same time. Yeah, it's like a time work. This also has been really fascinating week because we have so many interesting discussions in our facebook group, one of them was this idea of race preference in your dating profile, and is that considered racism and the drastic difference between the gay APPs dating apps and the Hetero dating APPs. And how the profiles of these gay dating APPs are really in the negative. Negative of like I don't date this race right, but then when you look at the profiles of Hetero APPS, it's in the positive I. guess quote, Unquote Positive. It's only things race. Basically, they're saying the same thing in a way that it's presented in a different way, and it just still blows my mind that there's just such a huge difference between a between the two different kinds of APPS. Totally, it was so fun though. Though doing facebook happy hour this Thursday I, so it was a really good way to kind of get these conversations out in one of our members said it makes the group more fun, because now you know these people in your starting to build a virtual friendship with everyone I was thinking about it, too. It's like pre Kobe. Teen. I know there were so many opportunities just to meet new people right and there's something really. Really beautiful about meeting New People and that doesn't need to be in a dating contacts that could just be friends or whoever? There's something about it that when you're always with your friends, family and significant others, it's great, but you tend to talk about the same things a lot yet, and there's something about being with new people that really just like one flexes your social muscles that you like sometimes can get really complacent with. Meeting people enough, and then also it opens you up to just new ideas and I think that's been really fantastic with the facebook group because that's been avoid and I personally just really get a lot of energy out of meeting New People and I do think like I don't think everything these translate to dating, but if you are someone that is looking to date meeting New People, even in a platonic sense, really like helps one making more interesting and well rounded, and then to also just makes you a lot more comfortable to just approach and have conversations on dates to helps you try a little bit harder to with New People. You can't just be super calm. You gotta get to know them. Ask them questions. I just can't believe are happy. Hour started at five thirty and ended at like two am for some people. Yeah, some people that were on Easter time. We're like doing the after after party. So yeah, if you're looking for something fun to do on a Thursday, we're going to keep having him every Thursday. We'd great hosts will be rotating the host, so get on that facebook group I think it was also fun. Fun, just like hearing from other people in their DA experiences like I shared in the room I was in, and I've also shared this with you you a, but it's one of those things that I'm kind of just back now. Navigating dating in a covert nineteen era and I've been having like mixed feelings about it like I actually I. Don't think I told you this yet. I actually ended up canceling the date that I was supposed to do on Friday night. You mean again i. told you a wing bed up. Literally my myself and the date. Just keep rescheduling on each other, and I think it's one of those things that we did a phone call. It went like relatively well. We talked a lot about like black lives. Matter was like in the midst of like everything happening, so I was like I can't really read it like as a date, but it was nice to see other people's perceptions of life, and what's. What's been going on, and that's really important for dating. And then he had asked to like move it to meet up in person, and I was a little hesitant, not because a him just because of everything happening I was like okay. What we do video date next, so we decided on that, and then I, just I don't know what it was like I. Don't know if it's video fatigue because unlike. All so much for work and stuff or that I'm not like fully ready to date right now. Still because like I ended something like in May, so it hasn't been that long. Were that not excited about this person? I just can't pinpoint what it actually is began needless to say. We both kind of kept playing like rescheduling. Roulette essentially and Yeah I. Just Friday came and I was like the last thing I want to do is get on the state well as I told you when I saw you is, it doesn't really matter what the reason is. You're still not excited to need up with him. Whether virtually or in person and my general rule of thumb is you always want to be in a situation where you set up the other? Other person for success, not for failure. If you're in a bad mood, you had a bad day. You're not excited, then. Don't go on the date because they're they're. They've already failed before. They even got on the date, so I think it's good that you've rescheduled and canceled. It's better because you didn't put him in a situation where he would definitely fail. Yet I didn't make him. Come all the way out here. But it did for an. Episode that we have this week, which is such a good one? It's a little longer than our normal like interview style, so definitely recommend though you make it through the end like we didn't want to edit it too much because it was just such good material, and you can always pause and come back so to walks instead of one think about it that way two for the price of one too, but I think there is a lot of interesting things we talked. Talked to mingy this week about just how like being alone after a break up? And how do you navigate like really loving yourself and dating yourself first before, just getting back out there and I think a lot of that. I started to think about with this situation to it's like I. talked about this in the episode, but the same excellent had the second time I had like this Earth Shattering break-up so I don't want it to be that way again like. I've bounced back completely different this time, but at the same time I also don't want to. Push it if I'm not super excited to be dating people again and you a. you had a really good point there. It's like if you're not excited. What's the point? Yeah, and we set up our guests a little bit more. This mingy she. She's a friend of Julie's from a while ago right? You've no her for a while, but her situation was something that I I've heard a lot of people be in a similar situation, which is, she had been in serious serial monogamous in relationships, and was in a long term relationship and broke up several months before quarantine hip obviously shoe, no corn Cova was about to happen and all of a sudden she had all this all this alone time, or like really really alone, and in this episode we talk about what it feels like to be truly single. Because sometimes you know like. If we're not in quarantine, you could say your technically single, but you're still going on dates. You're getting in and out of things, but in a dedicated time where you're just completely by yourself and being very single vulnerable. What does that feel like? What are the conversations? You've been having with yourself so this conversation. That's why it's a little bit longer. Because there's a lot of conversations, you should be happy with having Russell. But I wanNA rewind a little bit back because I have a surprise for you Julie I wonder if going to our facebook happy hour. Because it's all goes hand in hand in one of the rooms. We played, would you? What would you rather wait? Would you rather? Let's, let's say the really long route. What would you rather do? Would you rather, and there were a couple of scenarios that were presented. That I thought okay. I'M GONNA ask Julie Because. You were in that room. I want to ask you thought of three different. Than what we post in the room, this is the shit that we we talked about. Like during our happy hour, which was so interesting so three scenarios. First one is, would you rather date someone who only had friends of the opposite sex or had no friends at all? I'd rather a date someone with friends of the opposite sex. No friends at all is red flag to me like there's just like a relationship. The can't hold down any sort of relationship. Okay okay I think I would say the same thing you need someone who has human connection, and if they have no friends, it probably means they probably can't even hold on a relationship. Let me actually clarify. Do they not have friends because they like recently moved to a city and they don't. They don't have friends at all, because I think that's different, right? For purposes of this question, they just have no friends at all by love it. You're like diving deep. About your time line wing. You lost your you know. What with would you rather you always have to justify your answer and I would justify my answer if that person just. Hadn't fully acclimated somewhere new Okay, all right art giving people, but doubt here's your second scenario. Would you rather date someone who slept with your best friend, or who hates your best? Friend hates your best friend. Why. I don't think I unseat it like I guess. Why were you seeing you know what I? Meet a couple. You always think of like them having sex, don't you? Like I always like. People need to watch me on video. Right out. On where we can, you just rewind repeat that think of it vividly not like imagining them like naked, but I just think Oh, these two people upset right like it's just something that I think. Is there a couple I? Don't know it's just something. I always just make that association. So if it was my best friend in this person, I would just be like Oh. My God they had sex I would just always think about it. Yeah. I can I can kind of see that see. The thing is if they hate my best friend, how can we all hang out the appoint? Point, how can this relationship be sustainable? Okay, that's a good point and I guess the question is. Did they hook up a long long time ago? Here we go at the time like we tell me more. I'm trying to find. Her were ten years ago. Long before me. You know that's why if it wasn't I'm going back to my original question. Because yeah, you're right. If they hated them, I still wouldn't be able to like. Hang out with them, but. I would hate both of them if they like hooked up while we were dating, so it's almost irrelevant. I'd rather like. Try to bring them together. Just not even have that option. See I'm also thinking like this has never happened to me, but in an ideal world I'm thinking if they slept together and are still amicable than that must be really good like they don't hate each car. I love how us on that right now. I love it. I love it. Okay, third and final scenario. We've talked about this before, but I just want to have it on record. Would you rather have a series of short passionate relationships lasting a year or two or one term stable, but rather boring and complacent really? Oh, you know. Tough so I think a past south of mine would definitely upset the former of just like a bunch of passionate relationships. The future of wanting that is like a more stable lifelong partner is kind of leaning to that. I would like to do this in this game. Boring is it you know? Is it like? I guess okay if we're GONNA play the extreme of this game in. It's super boring and I literally rather be by myself than with this person. I would go for the string of short term relationships. It's just somewhat boring, not like super boring. You don't WanNa like Gouge your eyes out. Somewhat boring is still not a good situation. I, you know I'm someone to that. I've always enjoyed being in relationships when I am, but I'm also perfectly content being single so therefore I'm not like the type of person that will find a boyfriend or significant other just to have a boyfriend so I think I'm GonNa go with the original. I'm going like full circle hair to go back, but the short string short passion do relationships see my brain just goes to a long boring stable relationship, and then get them to listen to dateable. Are You can't change people. But dateable. Can I love it? Go in that room. Listen to me on headphones, and then we won't talk and I'll just do my thing anyway. I would just have a playlist for him. He's into episode. Hilarious, yeah I mean the other thing too I got. This binge this weekend of love life. What did you do this weekend? I watched love life dodd stuff. Oh, my Gosh! I'm so sleep deprived at this point. This is why I asked for this call to be earlier today. 'cause I'm hoping to put a bed by like. Have you had a wild weekend of love life onto so wild? This all start. This is Friday right. You message really like to thirty am. But I think reason why. Brigham is one I think everyone should watch because it was a really well done show on Hbo Man Kendra Yup. Yes Anna Kendrick. It's called. Love Life Hbo Max of Seven Days, free. That's. All in one night if you're really trying to optimize your spending here. But I think the reason why bring it up. Is it actually very much? Reminded me of our episode that we have today because it's like she basically just high levels want to give too much away. It chronicles heard through different life stages, and it really starts off like every episode is around like a guy in her life, and then or a person well at the beginning the guy. Trying to go, is that eventually? It becomes more about herself and her friends and mom and other relationships, and that's when you see like a noticeable shift in just like how she carries on her romantic relationships when she's comfortable with herself and happy with herself, and has built a life for herself, and isn't necessarily relying on someone else in at the beginning like it shows again, not gonNA. Give way too much, but like some bad relationships just because she's not at at one with her. So yeah. It reminded me of this episode and I've personally loves like thinking about my own like who'd be casted in different episodes like I. Don't know I think everyone kind of like thinks about their own life through that leads so I got to say. Thank you for turning me onto that because I've been watching three or four very similar shows, they're kind of the same demographic. Seem storylines seem structure, but what really drew me to the show and actually watch it from episode. One to ten in one night is because it didn't have the. I don't even know how to describe this in sex in the city. You always wanted her to end up with a guy. You get excited when a guy comes into her life, everybody gets excited and it's about the guy, but throughout this show she even narrates that the narrator, not her, but the narrator even says it's not about the guy and she they were throughout the name of the guy and say it's actually about him. It's about how she is. Is evolving grew these people in her life, so even though she comes in and out of relationships. You're not like excited when the guy comes in or when excited. When he kicked out, it's your more excited to see her growth and how she changes throughout the years. It's extremely relatable and profound. Totally and I think I had a little different opinion on this, but I actually think that it was really nice that it was a really diverse cast, yes. The leading lady was White, and that's where you and I differ a little. We think about most TV shows. It's like all white people. All black people like what there's like one show of Asian people like you know. It's like not really very diverse at all and I've noticed this on like a couple, other shows like four weddings and a funeral that show on young also been doing this that they've just had much more diverse like front groups like more love interest like I. Don't know I think it's a it's a stockport I think. Think. That TV shows really to do this type of stuff. Hey, I'm all for diversity I. Just don't love affirmative action when it comes to casting as they seem like they're typecast, and they are like the token right, and so the other show I've been watching in conjunction with love. Life is called the bowl type blue. It also features a lesbian black female character, and it's like okay. Is that the only diversity they can bring onto? Maybe that's like the formula now it. It doesn't matter you're right. There is progress being made what I like though is that the characters didn't follow like stereotypes like yes, they found like a black lesbian. They're trying to like capture a bunch of diversity in one character by only out. It wasn't like they played into like the tropes that we've heard about from our pass gas so I think that piece is a huge step for that. They're giving people individualistic ways of just being a character, not just fitting A. A stereotype, but if you do get a chance, definitely, check out the show. Let us know what you think Oh love to discuss a show with more people, and it's really related to our episode today it's about the evolution of dating yourself, and what are the learnings that you can come out of this quarantine and get back out into the world? What can you really apply so here? My predictions for how single people will come out of quarantine. Yeah, let's do it, okay. I think a lot of single people will be extremely. Maybe no, I want to make this statement. A lot of single people will be much more experimental in their dating. That could be sexually. That could also be well within reason that could also be how they meet people how they interact with people and how they carry conversations. They have thrown. The old data view questions out the window and said I've decided that I can find a deeper and better connection through this set of questions, so the prediction is the world will be not as predictable when it comes sedating. sedating your dates won't be that predictable. More I love it and I hate the data view I think that has been one of the best revelations on this podcast, so the episode, if anyone vistas what went on a date with injure way back way back, I think it was like season, two or three and the data view is just one of those terms that stuck, and I agree with you I. Think People will also be more open with race, because the such in the moment right now and i. think people are really going to second guess their interactions in. the the way they view it I know personally look through the APP set still had it as a preference, and I know a lot of observing getting rid of it as a preference in made sure that it was changed open to all so I think that people in general will start to be much more Open that way too I. Think my other prediction is that there are a lot of people that have done the self work I think there is a group that has and there's probably a group that hasn't, but I think the people that have done. Done the self work kind of similar to what you said, but like they're going to really break through the clutter like they're going to be able to identify those people that are looking for that quarantine buster, someone just have sex with really quick or the person that like is not really there for like a deep and meaningful relationship pending. That's what they wanted. Or maybe they'll come out in power to be like actually a relationship isn't what I'm looking for. Right now I think people are just going to be a lot more clarity and really sift through the. More love! It can't wait to see that happen. Let's do a couple of announcements. Just really quick. Thank you all for leaving. The ratings and reviews has seriously helped so much so if you could drop us a five star reading that would be exceptionally appreciative, and if you're so inclined to leave us a one or two liner review, it really really helps us continue to grow. Grow and bring this podcast to you and get you great guests so definitely want to call that out, and then just the other quick announcement on my side podcast we did with mindy on her. PODCAST is also alive. So you're hearing the one that we did with her on our podcast. You can hear us on her podcast, so there's so much love and podcast to. To go rounds of check that out at first of all podcast we talk about totally different topics by the way, so it's not a repeat conversation at all on her podcast and this past week we were onto other podcasts. Kind dating, and the other one was fifty one first dates still polar opposite conversations on all of those. It's so great to talk to other dating podcasters. podcasters because we have similar yet very different experiences as always find to hear different perspectives to so check out those podcasts, and if you love us if you love many of you, love fifty fifty one first AIDS. If you love kind of dating Tele Friend, you know this is a gift. You can give to them right now. That friend in need that friends can really. Use these conversations to help them get through something. Gift them with the gift of podcasts called dateable. And speaking of PODCAST, you know we're a part of the FROLIC network, and they're a ton of other wonderful podcasts on there as well. They're not just dating or relationship related, so here's one for you all to check out I'm Sarah Wendell from smart podcast. trashy books part of the FROLIC podcast network smart podcast is a weekly show that focuses on romance fiction than Nifty folks who read it and write it and always on what we're reading and recommending and WANNA. Tell you about. We could be an expensive podcast to listen to, but we promise great book recommendations and conversations every week you can find new episodes every Friday, and you can find smart podcast trashy books on your favorite podcast APP. All right now, let's get to our conversation with mingy. When we first started this podcast I have a confession I really thought that any topics or discussions around dating had to involve you dating and I never really thought about talking about dating when you're single or alone or lonely, it just felt like dating needed to involve other people in the story, but our guest today will prove us wrong, and actually I think. Think previous episodes have professed wrong. That dating is really about dating yourself as well. That's that's really most of that journey, so we got dingy here. She is currently living in Los. Angeles. She's been there for six years, but she is originally from the area. She's thirty four pretty single, and has been taking a dating sabbatical and also actively going on dates. On and off. Actually. Virtually. So. What's interesting? Juice story is that she recently broke up with a long term boyfriend that she lived with for two years about six months ago. She's been learning how to be alone at independent again and navigating the single life in her thirties during a time of Cova nineteen. So many different layers, and then on top of it all. It's Cova nineteen quarantine. So she's been thinking about her identity future marriage, self, love, family, etcetera, and starting to explore dating again, but through a new Lens, and wanting to support the granting with all of the above, she is also the host of the podcast first of all, so hi Mindy! How are you I? Am doing as wonderful as a human being. In the United States. During quarantine can be doing so hanging there. We were just joking around. What was we were talking about the meam that you saw Julie? It was like twenty thirteen. All you had to do that flakes Shell and then twenty twenty. It's like you gotta survive. Pandemic be in like the demise of capitalism. This entire revolution that we're in now, so yeah, Chicago real in twenty twenty. That's for sure she got real. It puts everything in perspective all that Shit that we dealt with last year. O. Eilly was nothing that literally is nothing means nothing anymore and everything. We're dealing with this year. This is the real stuff. This is the stuff that will affect our future. An impact our lives forever, but this is also a time. Time that everyone's trying to deal with self-identity dealing with. What do I really want in life? What do I want in love? What is his journey Amman? If I'm truly in control of my life, what does that really mean in? Am I making the right decisions, so let's start with you claiming that you're like a serial monogamous even before your last boyfriend. What has been your relationship experience up until this last one? To be written and created into many shows Roku. Certainly been evaluating all of that in the last six months for sure but I in the nuts I think the best way to summarize it is the whole zero monogamist terminology that has been thrown around for quite some time, actually like in the grand things, not that long I feel like it's a pretty new like in our lifetimes at least. Are How many people my parents in our parents generation sermon arguments because everyone was a serial monogamous. And now no one is today's. Agreed so my friends and I have talked about my dating life Ad. Nauseam I'm very fortunate to have some lifelong girlfriends who've been there. You know since the beginning, but the joke is that you know that came out of the room. is boy crazy probably like shine from the doctor? Because I just I've in crushing on boys as far back as I can remember and like kind of the hopeless romantic like always wanting to find the prince charming Disney princess, the whole Shebang, but if I'm doing if I'm doing calculations correctly. If you broke up with a long term relationship this boyfriend six months ago, this is the longest you've been single for right. Technically so what I would say is I'm thirty four now? The the break-up before this boy friend, the last serious boyfriend, there was a couple years of being okay. I mean okay, actually I'll label. A single is like I didn't have a boyfriend. I didn't have a serious boyfriend. Twenty fourteen to the two thousand seventeen, so three years of like I dated casually, but did not have a monogamous like serious. You were my boyfriend introducing you to my friends and family situation for three years. Now is the longest, but they were a man in your rotation. Though there there were. A man fun. I'm exhausted, you buy. I've thought about that before and I'm like Oh, I was single in this period. Wait. There were people in that period. You know it's like. And, there's only been one time at least in my life that I was like dead single hectically, 'cause I was getting over heartbreak. So that's where it was, but I was not actively talking to anyone I think everyone when they're dating. They're either going into something or getting out of yeah. I really think it's everyone's on a path in or out. It's really rare to be completely single I think I've only been single completely single for like two or three months of. Of, my life to where I'm not talking to anybody exactly, if that is the case, then then it must mean that after years of being quote unquote single, and then you finally meet this man and you guys enter enter into a relationship in must be significant, because it is bouncing back from a couple years of not having a boyfriend and then having this breakup, so let's let's revisit the break-up if we can walk us through what happened and why it happened we're. It's just yeah I. Mean it's been six months. I've had a lotta time to process it. Technically mutual I suppose there's just a lot of. This is no disrespect to my ex. I think he's a wonderful human being. It was just a a signifier of where we were at as two individuals. I think there was a lot of love and a lot of passion and friendship. There was a lot of codependency and they get the end of the day. It's easy to muddle all of those. and when you're still figuring out who you are as an individual, it's easy to kind of like. Put Your project your stuff on somebody else or like. Avoid dealing with your own stuff so as much as like. There are so many really wonderful things about that relationship in there is why stayed in it for two years you know me a lot of it has to do with my age. Where I was at in life in the number of serious relationships, I had gone through, and my my maturity slash on the other side of like my maybe lack of tolerance for certain things of like wanting to really figure some. Some things out and having some sort of concrete lands or That's for the future, and if it wasn't than sounds Shitty were we doing then, but like realistically as a woman I'm really just accepting in owning this like I'm on a different clock, man and I don't i. don't resent that anymore. I accepted. It is what it is, but I'm on a different clock. I made decisions about what I want in my life. That I was like I can't just be like WHOA. Let's figure out. Why feel like you think that like the reason why most people break up is eat there like someone cheats or something terrible. Terrible, but I think the majority of the time it actually is incompatible life stage, or they're at different places at different times so i. feel like your story is razzing. Need A and. I'm sure a lot of listeners out. There have been in similar situations that it's like I. Don't necessarily want it to end, but it's very clear that we're not on the same timeline at all now. Yeah, I agree you in our recent episode called relationships even want one our guest talk about that. Sometimes relationship just runs its course. You have to break up before it gets really ugly, and you just have to appreciate and be grateful. Grateful for your time together, and if two people are not on the same page for moving forward with that relationship, then it's no matter how much you love each other as Mark Manson said, love is just simply not enough. You go through this break up and you go through the healing process and all of a sudden cove it hits, and you find yourself being in quarantine alone. Walk us through how that's really impacted your whole healing process to start that off I say quarantine has been the biggest blessing in my life to be completely honest. We broke up in December right before Christmas. which is a great time to? Have your heart. Put in a blender and again it's there's no great way to break up whether it's because you know. Someone cheated which I've dealt with or because you realize that somebody love really really deeply is just not working out either way it sucks. It's like having a part of you. Especially at that point, you know two years living with someone having full integration of like two lives merged together as one on to untangle that emotionally physically moved out like it was really terrible. It was like a shitty time, so in that way I felt like going into quarantine was a waiter. Cocoon me a little bit and I. I was very grateful that I didn't have to see anybody because it really knocked me on my ass. You guys like I. There's something about the nature of this relationship, the timing of it in terms of where I am at life. The expectations that I had in the home that I had I had captured a with him. You know and we had been acting in accordance to that in playing house, you know and dealing with money and our careers. Our families had partially met and had Thanksgiving like there are. There's a lot to unpack and to let go of I. Don't say in acute way like I just felt like. Liberated by that break-up, and I had a lot of reconciling to do with self because the way that I reacted in that. Break Up, and I've been through multiple breakups. It kicked my ass. I think getting that space to just like completely disconnect from the world on purpose because I quote unquote had to I. Really Am grateful for it as Sucky as circumstances mentioned for sure so walk. Walk US through. Okay, so, what was your immediate? You mentioned the kind of had to like. Unravel your life together you does this I just love good time line. I love to hear the you know verbatim of what's happening. So did you immediately move out urge? He moved out like what was kind of the logistics there. And at what point were you kind of on your own? Breakup don't happen to abruptly. Even though like the final conversation might be a thing, you know the nail. Burgum all breakups take hell along to like actually think in and be truly complete right that in that objective way like it's months for us to actually break up, but technically we broke up before Christmas and within two days of us, having the conversation because living situation with out of state he'd been living with me in L. A. Within Forty eight hours of this conversation, he was gone. Oh! Oh, wow, which was brutal, and it was ripe for Christmas, so the magnitude of that stark, he's here one minute in all of his stuff and everything that we shared is like sucked out completely absent out of my life. I was thinking about moving I was like I can't be here. Those devastated and I mean in terms of the issues that have been coming up. You know they had had some time to be brought up for several months prior to the the breakup, so there's always. A ramp I guess I. Don't know if it's on her. Own and offering. It's terrible and they're at each point. You know when you're reflecting back on it. You're like at what point could we have turned it around, or you know if we had made a different decision or if we had had that conversation? If you know the should've could've would've. there were multiple moments that we're reconciling the fact that we are on two different pages the way that we're dealing with these hardships, also revealing of like compatibility I was having massive anxiety and I don't blame them like after all is said and done like I went to so much hurt, and I definitely played like the resentful bidder ex culprit at different moments I've gone through that hole. But you know when you have the time to step back I'm like I get why he wasn't. He was trying to honestly do right by me and say not over commit to something that he wasn't ready for by Ninety So. He leaves within forty eight hours than he said the on this like roller coaster. Like at what point was it quarantine? was that like kind of when things started to come together, or were not come together, but acceptance of it or were you? Acceptance isn't the right word, but I guess just. Hear motions Rod I wouldn't go away. You guys think about this because what I've noticed in my own seen patterns right and there's even memes about this because the the meme is that right in the direct aftermath of a break-up, women experience the break-up like right that right away right away. The station is immediate like Arnold. It's inescapable is just right there. Right frontloaded. That's the way I front. Load all the despair but A kind of trickles down, you know who who knows how long that takes, but it Kinda tapers off their lot of guys again. This is so generalizes so sexist like a lot of heterosexual men enter a kind of a denial phase or gene, like I can't even deal with this so I'm not gonNA and whether that's conscious or not I don't know, but like go kick it with people or do whatever to distract themselves a. A when I when I was a dating coach, I only coached men, and most of them would come to me and say. Can you just tell me how to get more dates Can you tell me how to be more attractive to women? And when you go deeper, it's always an ex that triggered something in them to come to me. Where on the surface level? They think they need some sort of like really shallow. But when you dig deeper, it's always something. They did not address within X. so the pattern I was seeing was for women. As soon as they go through the break-up. Talk talk it out. Talk it out. Think it out. Talk it out. Think it out. Cried out. Talk it out. I will talk to my local Barista. Call up my mom at three. Am You talked to it? But men and again I agree with you I don't want to generalize, but this is what I saw in the patter with one hundred percent of the men that I coach that they would go through immediately, not even denial. It's distraction because you know what their friends would do they go. Let's go to bars. Let's hit the club. Let's get you out of your house. Let's get you meeting girls. They meet girls, and that first month is bliss their like I. Don't Miss. Miss my accent all I. This is awesome. A meeting new chicks I'm like hanging out all the time and hang out with my boys. It's after that first or second month something it's either like a smell that reminds them of their acts yet or a social media posts, a trigger something happens, and they fricken blow up like when Shit goes down when they're like Holy Shit. I haven't processed any of my despair I. Don't know what I'm feeling right now. And why do I feel so loss and that's when they like literally. And they don't know who to turn to, but by then the women have already kind of gone through. Their healing process and it just like the guy a lot of times. We'll come back passively. It's either like on the OPPO. Social media posts for a quick tax is just thinking about you by then. The woman is basically kind of over it I. Call it the one month rule because no NIHIL. They always come back in a month. A month is somewhat and so on the dawn like it's no fail every single time in agree with you. It's so hard because I mean I've had like an earth shattering break that I literally could not get out of bed when it happened like I, remember just feeling so down on it, and then you start to feel better. You've talked to a Zillion of your girlfriends and like. Please stop talking about this. Even listed therapy. You know it's like you've gone through all this. You're starting to mend, and then like soon as you're starting to bend, it's like they know, and they just come right back like it's no fail every time psychologically what I learned was through a relationship. A woman is driven by her own internal voice, and that voice is really strong voice, and guides them through all the pressures, and all the time questions, and all of that like it's our internal voice. What drives us through relationships for men? It's multiple voices. They're like dealing with multiple voices whether it's their friends society whatever it may be, they don't actually have one strong voice and drives them so after a break-up a woman. Woman. Strong voice is a one that's guiding them through the break up, and they feel like they can rely on this person because this internal voice has been there for this whole time for the guy, all the voices kind of disappear, and they don't find their voice, and that's why there's all the confusion on. What should I be feeling? Why am I feeling this way? Then this is why like eventually when they do find their voice. It's like months and months down. The wires were just not on the same timeline I'm not generalizing. This is pure psychology and I'm personally fascinated by that I. find a Lotta like the right now. Poetically theoretically I think that's very beautiful, because that's what. That's why we have mute movies music. Is because of this eternal Porsche. All right bad dance I don't even know it's a call it. Whatever it is so Vinci. A month in does your ex come back and where you at? Let's take a quick break because we have a really fun announcement Julian. I compiled a list of east central dating essentials during this time with products that we've personally picked out. We think would be perfect for anybody who's dating. We're about to get up. Get back out there. Who's just staying at home in dating as well? It ranges from everything from. From books books from our past guests to gadgets and too sexy time stuff twice and stuff you know what I mean. If you WANNA get the full list. Just go to Amazon dot com slash shop slash dateable podcast now back to the show so Benji okay, so a month in directs come comeback where you at all I mean it was less than a month. We I mean it was okay the next day. It's the holidays it was. In your years. There's a lot of reflecting its again the tough thing. We never had a shortage of love. There was no like absence of like desire. There is no absence of devotion. It was trying to accept this shitty truth that maybe I'm not the best person for you right now. It both assets like my add to deal with that. He had to deal with that, so we're both trying to do the right thing for ourselves. Slash each other, which is very noble, but we're both human beings, and it's just gonNa suck to like again. You're detoxing from summit. That sounds terrible, but like you are you totally? Totally arm. You're detoxing from them and so yeah, we. We had a rollercoaster rollercoaster up until quarantine. Actually you know I, I feel terrible because I'm the one that's like volunteering ours story in public, but you know up until quarantine. We're back and forth about letting. Can't we work this out? Because we did care about each other so much and had made stupid mistakes in hurt each other in the interim, but right up until quarantine like literally into March two three months after we're talking about. Should we meet up? Shall we try to work it out? And I was really painful. It was super super painful. Again you gone through all for me as I've gone through three solid months of like literally if I'm not sleeping, I am toiling over this spray gumming process every emotion I'm looking at every pro and con I'm talking to my counselors, and it's not just women like my brothers, one of my best friends and he's always been such a great male. You know mind in. He's always looking out for me. Me But he does it. He doesn't call me. He doesn't tell me Oh shit like he keeps a very real. So you know just like kind of going through every aspect, even talking with my ex like just weird. Ping Pong pinball all over the place it was it was a lot, and did you see each other as well? We ran so again. The the K. drama continues in the snow. We met at Sundance, and Sundance happens in January, and so in a very dramatic fashion. We we saw each other at Sundance, and that was also like a moment of like. I really raking this. You really hard now is tough, so we did each other in January and then went back our respective states. Doing our thing I'm trying to get over. He's trying to get over it. It was it was rough. Man Okay, so was it quarantine like was that like the nail on the coffin that you're like moving forward, or was there a moment before that? That was like multiple. Like swear to God. It's like a rocket. That's trying to launch into space. I'm realizing more. That's one analogy because you have to break through the atmosphere, Um. There's a lot of resistance you. Break through that and then once you're in space kind of coasting. That's one analogy. The other part that I was calling. It was like you're like stuck in Tar, and you're just like knitting tar. You're trying to remove it from union, and it's just like it's residue. Right like suck. You or I don't. I like it because both of them have that heaviness to them, but same time there is that light at the end of the tunnel. You know that once tar off your body, or once you break through the atmosphere that there's no turning back. You just going right. Funny thing is even while we're together and talking about breaking up. We had even talked about. Should we break up and then see again in a year, we we. We talked about a lot of different scenarios I've done the. Region. We don't have time to do this on I. Guess another whole episode for another time, but you know what that is just so telling people who truly care about each other and want to work things out authentically, and you're not trying to give up because at some point I'm sure you go back to your respective homes, and you think if we just try hard enough. Yeah, we can make this work. Let's play out all the scenarios and you want to believe it like especially just like from what were showed in like movies at all this shed. It's like you want to believe that love is enough and right. Yeah, it's not so I will counter Mr. Manson I do think love. It does conquer all end it is enough, but the the recipient, or who that love is placed upon is the most important thing so as cliche as it sounds the main thing that I was learning through the break-up through like literally from the moment that we were coming to this conclusion and hit me. Hit me like we were saying immediately hit me instantaneously like Oche Shit. This is really happening. I have to figure out. My entire life is broke down united so that recognition of how much I was not loving to myself was really obvious, really quick, and that was very unsettling, very upsetting very scary to recognize that without him. The hell do I do now, and I don't like even saying that out loud because I'm very independent, very fragile in some ways very confident woman, but that I completely fell apart. I actually think that's when the breakup are the hardest in a way. It's there's so many different factors I'm not going to say. It's like only that like obviously just the depth of it and all that, but I remember like for my own instance. I felt like I lost myself a little in the relationship because I was so focused on this person, so that's when he was gone. It just felt like this major void was gone. Gone and I think I mean if you're in a relationship, there's GonNa be avoid right like someone's gone that you're used to being with all the time, so it's inevitable, but yeah I think if you've like feel like you've lost a bit of yourself along with it goes even deeper. Yeah, climbing out of that hole if you will are that meant for victims, but It's frigging hard, and and for somebody again it's also frame of mind right like if I you myself and I have my own identity as I`ma, strong, capable independent woman, but in this instance like you're getting a very very sobering reckoning while you're getting your ass handed to you of like. Oh, are you now like no, because I'm recognizing how much I had kind of thrown myself in some ways of you so beautiful. Beautiful right but I really like kind of all of me into this relationship, and that was something that I really needed to sit within that like to sit in the pain and recognize. There's something really not okay about. It was just the pain. Oh, he's gone. It was like I was like who the Hell Am I. That's a scary place to be versus just dismiss somebody in its though sad that this person's now. It was straight up panic in like fear. I! Don't also put it, but if anything, the silver linings which I'm very silver linings ten a person at the end of the day much optimist. It was the thing that I think I needed to reconcile some traumas like unresolved issues with family. I had an abusive boyfriend as a teenager that I hadn't fully healed from like things like that, they all came to the surface in. Rapid succession it was just like one after another like all right. And now we have a pandemic, but you know so I had a conversation with my co worker about this who recently gave birth and when she was pregnant, she said the hardest thing she had to deal with was the change in her identity and I think one of the things that as women, especially as we go through all these different kinds of identities that are really hand in hand with the other people in our lives like I am a daughter. I am a girlfriend. I am a friend. I am a dog, mom. These are all identities right and when you lose that person who gives you the identity you lose. Lose part of yourself. That is absolutely true, so I think independent women. It's really hard to reconcile that because we think well I'm independent, which means I have this independent identity, but we forget that it is really like relative to the other people in our lives absolute, and it's also the loss, not just of the person, but of the life that you thought you were going to have yeah I think that is really hard to grapple I. Remember having this hard time to just being like I think it was because I had been single before for a long time like dating all the time and then I finally met that person right, and then when ends. You're like up back here again. You're older. And I was not I I really had put a lot of work into like being a modern woman where I'm like. Why am very spiritual to you know I'm like divine timing when things happen, they happen and murals have happened in my life before I'm no exception I. Don't dictate this I'm recognizing how much of a control freak I was and the London like all these elements of my life. That I had really been doing my absolute best working so hard. You kind of keep in this safe little bubble so that it could be all that I dreamed of and more. Drift away like you said. It's like it's a little death that any relationship like when you you care about somebody you gotTa. Grieve it, also reading and then learning to be alone, and really the identity of do I. Love Myself. I think I have made a lot of headway especially in that previous stint of being single mike dating around learning how to have boundaries saying no just funny as soon as I met my ex like all the boundaries. I don't know about you, too, but I know that as soon as I go when I go through. Break Up. The first thing that comes to my mind is panic. Oh my God I have to do this. Shit I'll. Have to get myself back out there. What's out there? Is there anybody out there? And how do I develop feelings again with someone and start from square one? How do you deal with that panic? I don't even know like I'm trying to think back on how that it was? This is like Odyssey me, putting my heart to anybody going through heartbreakers, we have all gone through in some form in. Maybe you know I don't want it to. Maybe will again in the future. I felt a again identify I'm really deep psychology biles dealing with abandonment issues like he abandoned me even though the way he looked at it and again the way I even looked at it when I was in a sober mind was. was that was to be the best we could be to ourselves into each other men. The rational way were approach personal and your you know again a human being that has a lifetime of trauma in a lifetime of like unresolved emotional issues. Yeah I. When I was angry when I was sad, I felt like you just threw me aside, and you let I've totally been there i. feel like I'm so resited story right now Veggie. It's definitely one of those things I remember. It was so logical, but I like for me. It was the same emotional trap that was like. Did you not love me enough for like? Break, but I think he way to answer your question. I've dealt with it. Multiple ways because I've had a couple instances I think the first time I dealt with getting panic of getting back out there by just avoiding and I. Don't for way too long like I think in reg well. I shouldn't say in retrospect I would fix it I think I had to deal with what I was dealing in. That's what my truth was. At that point in my life and I think actually for me. Me Like I did take like a solid year. That I really wasn't dating like I. Had Blake I mean? My ax was still there to some degree like it wasn't like I. Guess I wasn't like totally, but we were seeing each other, but we. He was like mentally taking up space. If that makes sense, but we weren't seeing each other. I think I might have had like no. I think pretty single I like definitely went through a very long dry period to at that time, I. Stuck that Julie 'cause that's. My thing was like I done. I've gone off the dating apps and off as a single because you know. I'm sure you guys have talked about this so much on this. Like, it's exhausting. Though exhausting, but they're stunned parts to it. That's what we do it, but there's only it's exhausting and so I generally gone and waves, but I'd always kind of I knew that, at least after this. Break up like I know that a distraction I, know that this Niki laying right not pretty and wanting somebody to just want me and being real with myself about that, so I did my very best in actually went a whole month without even downloading on my phone and for me, that was significant. In that month I was literally dealing with the hardest emotions like again, frontloading all the despair, and just dealing with it, and doing my best not to go back onto that crutch because I knew it was a crutch, and it wasn't going to actually make me feel better at the end of the day that it was a very fleeting distraction, but it was after that month. You know I did get back on, but it only proved my. My point lying is such a momentary alleviating hearing, but did you get back on during quarantine? We're was this in relation to quarantine like. When did you decide that? Okay I'm moving on from this relationship. Yeah, so I had to okay a month absence January. I had the APPS on my phone like it was a distraction, and then I got all because it was just like. This isn't good and I focused on me which I knew. Eating your vegetables. You know that's what needs to be done. So I was like I'm a frigging thirty year old woman I. Want like I was in so much pain that like. Let's just do the damn work. Let's just do the therapy. Let's let's. Like, let's do the meditating like we gotta do this and so actually travelled a bit. I went to see my brother in Seattle this was right when covert ramping up, so I lay in Seattle, too. Yeah, in Seattle I went to. Seattle Austin and New York. And then it came back to La and then went into lockdown. So you know like I was on it and I was swiping but I wasn't ever like pursuing anything again. It was a distraction and I wasn't really active on it. I don't know what the timeline is designed. Time right now. I had a lot of work to do so yeah I don't know I guess more recently I've just like I was just chatting with people wasn't taking anything. Seriously still am like. It's been really great. Because quarantine may be have so much more time for myself that I actually was filling up the hours really well with work. I work out a lot. Like the number one thing when I went through my bad break up I was working out like twice a day for. That's pretty damn good it is. I have been working on twice a day even if it's just like a walk. A. Better than ice cream. Runs to the grocery store help to. I'm like I can't just get it. That's true. Okay, so, is this your first time doing therapy of done their people for I done therapy really for the first time a couple years ago of actually by I love our, he passed away in twenty eighteen, so actually that was announced tough, because I was dating my exit the time there's a lot of layers that we went through a lot together, and I was going through a lot in life, so actually that an impetus for me to actually get therapy realistically I. It would have been really good for me. I think if I gone therapy after my abusive excellent, I was a teenager. Vow would have been a very important I. think again therapy, but being korean-american right like what's therapies. Money. Does my parents, but I if I had asked for I had pushed for it, they would've but I was nineteen. You don't know. I. Didn't I object on that? Because I was like this little kid at Berkeley studying public health like I knew there would be good for a lot of different reasons like just let it apply to me of until it really really mattered. I can't change the past, but better late than never right, so I did start therapy a little bit in two thousand eighteen. It was expensive. etc. I I'm a freelance. Creative producer and actor. TONS OF MONIES? I didn't make it a priority to pay for therapy, but after this break up, I've been doing therapy every week. Got It so this time around. It's more of a priority. One hundred percent Dr, big difference it is a big of and did you make that a goal from the very beginning, or was it something that as you healed? Healed along the way you decide to implement it I think it was more along the way, but it was definitely something in my gut, instinctually, and even prior to the break-up, because we were fighting so much, and it was really taking a toll in terms of like my anger, my anxiety feelings of just like uncertainty about the future. It was mounting. Healing? I had already had months of knowing deep down that I would in permit it that it would be helpful again. Take that leap again. I'm still unpacking like what were the actual barriers between taking the step to actually do it and implement something that I knew for quite a while would be something helpful and importance, and making it a priority making it something that notes uses. I'm going to make it happen because I'm really good about that. A lot of other aspects of my life of course right right well when I went through my brutal therapy by brutal breakup. They really. That's actually the first time. No I started therapy like I started better help that was like the first one the online version and I found that a really great gateway into therapy, and I always say that I think it's like a really great accessible way to get started and then. Not to plug, but they are dateable sponsor, so yes, they are! We love PGA. At me because I pay them. I'm like that's what I've been using. Yeah, okay, yeah I most amazing. Right now in virtual land where we can't see people, anyways, it's like the perfect solution and I did end up deciding to go to in per because i. just felt like I wanted to try that experience made it honestly like as difficult as the break-up was for me. It totally changed me as a person like I think like the layers of depth, thyge ought after that break-up, and just from I mean obviously the experiences I went through in that relationship, but also just the work that I did on myself with therapy. It was like monumental like I I'm forever grateful for that experience because I don't think I'd be the person. Person I am today without it. One hundred percent agree as as excruciating as it is Ray, and that's what I think even again. The opt annoying optimist in me as like even with all of this is happening right now. It is not uncomfortable in. It's so like just kind of throwing us all into this crazy turmoil of evaluation and discomfort of not being able to do everything that we wanna do in having to prioritize than and think of all the different consequences of every single little action. It's so exhausting, but at the same time I feel like sometimes. That's what it takes to like. Really yet. It together right and. That's a good thing. Come out of it. That's the key word. There is discomfort when you're uncomfortable. That's the only way to change and push yourself forward, so what I love about this conversation. Is that Mindy you? You could act as a future person for somebody. Listen to this episode right now. Who's going through what you went through? Let's say three months ago and you're like coming to them from the future, and in hindsight, what do you think are some the things that you did to make yourself uncomfortable? But that really you really reaped the benefits from your so Craig. I think really sitting in the hurt like that's one thing I just had to sit in it instead of distracting that first month. So like way, but I'm like I. Want to congratulate. My s stupid of that sounds I. WanNa. Give myself props for not repeating. Would I knew would be bad for me. For me, you know what I mean for somebody else's measuring. Stick me not because something completely different, but it's like an addict. Right like you went a whole month. You didn't go back to what you knew. Logically at in your gut would not help you, and for that I do WanNa give myself grace at status because I. let my solve, Greece. There's nothing like that pain sitting in your bones to remind. Remind you. I will not go through this again. If I can help it right and burning hot, a transmute that pain into love for yourself, for lack of better words is is really powerful, and so sitting in the pain was one thing taking responsibility. There was the second thing in sitting in the pain, and then taking time really to reflect and thank you again to quarantine. I needed to I, had. To do it. But also I, couldn't I could chosen to just Netflix's all day and Nah. You sounded. Yeah yeah, I was just like again. It came to like the priorities of like Oh my God. I'm thirty four newly single records you now. I don't know when the hell I can ever meet somebody if I do want the family that I want that literally is one of the reasons why we broke up was because I had decided like Yeah I. Do want to have a family within the next ideally in the next few years that means I cannot just spend the next year or two digging around and dry, and now we're in quarantine. I gotta get it together. I need to like. Get right with myself. One of our roads that we had this season is called quarantine from boys, but actually Hotel in Leicester and she made a really great analogy like know in the winter beers hibernate, and they lake get their shit together, and there's nothing wrong with that in the need that in order to the rival, when it becomes time that they're out of hibernation, so share saying that the quarantine is the perfect time because I think the question that led up to. It was like what happens when you're freaking out that you're losing valuable time in. You're like dating life. especially as the clock is ticking, you're getting older etc? And she was saying like the value of working on. Yourself is a step towards that one hundred. One hundred percent and I think the payoff is. Invaluable. You can't even measure that because for me is recognizing the ways that I had contributed to the demise of the break. You know what I mean like the immature version of me. I think in past life I would be really just like sitting in pain but I don't know like coming from like a super egotistical way. act like you're better off without him didn't like forget him. Him I didn't want to. Though like I cared about him, and I was trying to look at it from one of my supposed to learn out of this. Because why am I here again? Why did I thought this was gonNA work out I thought this, was it? We have so much love for each other. We had XYZ not all these components. Why did it not work in? In. It really hit me hard, and I had to accept responsibility for the ways that I could shoot it to not having a workout and those are very real. It's not like blaming him or blaming me is just really becoming more objective about it and saying that stuff. I need to work on that. Is something completely separate from him? Because take that person out of the equation. Equation a things get goes down and you get into a conflict I saw patterns I was like I freak out I. Shut Down I recognize I'm not as good of a communicator as I thought the pattern that we had in our relationship why he would come to these different conclusions that I get so angry about, but I'm like did I ever clearly state what I wanted? And if when I changed my mind, which happens in a human life I've changed my mind her being super casual to becoming a lot more serious. How did I communicate that to him and was that reasonable was at fair, if the water them, we're like sucky answers to like really be like. Oh, I have a bad pretty bad I mean that's so important. Because I think we were talking about earlier like the people that just. Just jump right back into dating or distract themselves. They don't have that time to process it and I think you need that time because if you don't, you're going to get into another relationship in the same. Shit's going to happen again, right? It's really important, and like I said you know I've had breakups before and I definitely didn't take that time. Just recognizing like you'll get caught the same lessons over and over until less. And I'm a pretty stubborn person. So were there any like tactical things that you did like? was there anything that you can pass on is like advice for people, or was it really just therapy? Like what therapy was one part of it? And that will, as it was a process, because I went to multiple therapists before I kind of found. One the one Even then I'm recognizing I. Think I'm treating this like. Don't put too many expectations on even that one, because maybe she's a great therapist for this particular moment. Ring, really really aware and an okay with it just serve that purpose in I don't. I don't need to stay with that. There was forever. You don't need to be married to that therapists. We had a therapist on the show wants. She said that she'd like five therapists over that therapists for different things in different stages of life, so it really a thing and i. think the what you just said to about finding the one. That's also a thing because it's like if you don't jive with that person, how can you just like unload your life to them exactly exactly and I? I'm honestly really. The focus of the takeaways from this period of my life is to genuinely learn to love myself and loving. Loving yourself doesn't mean just doing whatever you feel like I'm really learning what that means like. It means protecting yourself and disciplining ourselves and protecting you know what you want. In the long term versus short term that's a lot of maturity in some awareness to purdue that not only theoretically know in your head, but to act it. That's also different right? All the little things that I was doing was burning. Trust myself by said I'M GONNA work out today and working out that day building? Trust between me. You know what I mean and like I just gone whole spiritual woo. It honestly has saved my life to the honest it saved. Mice is preserved my sanity. It's given me clarity really living and walking the talk of like. If you're not good to you, you're not that anybody. You know what I mean. There's there's a limit that's what dating yourself is about your showing yourself. Love your morning yourself. You're so showing yourself with romance should feel like, and that's what helps you to recognize love with someone else if we don't show the love to ourselves, how will we ever know what kind of love that we want right exactly? So, what revelations did you have out of this time? Like? What do you want in the future now and has a change from before I think it has. One of the criteria you know I I still I recognize I've accepted I. Do want somebody like my grandma. We're talk about this last week. My grandma was arguing that like I. Don't need somebody looking. Right looks are overrated and that good looking people cheat, and you just somebody that'll be a good provider and believes in God like that's some practical. But I'm I'm kind of like I'm urging the practical winning the romantic and I'm just like. I do WANNA. Be attracted to person on good ously. What like my criteria? Of that I enjoy spending time with, but also really someone who will be a good dad. I mean become a big thing in my life. Somebody who wants a family and if I would want my child to be like them period you know before it was just like how ambitious are you like? How passionate a person like all these things that I don't think are bad, but. But they definitely evolved. You know got it, so it helped you like kind of fine tune what you're looking for. Yeah, yeah, and I. It's just where I'm at in life to I. Don't. I don't think I was wrong for wanting the things I wanted before. That's like new again. Loving myself and just forgiving. You know that's what you wanted now. What do you want now? freaking out about everything that happened before learn from it and then apply it literally is all you can do your same goals of like marriage kids. All of that hasn't changed. It's more now. You have a better path to find someone that equally shares that Zion gatting I think so, and and to have more realistic, more gracious expectations of what that will actually look like I very thankful to my last relationship, because living with somebody really merging my life, and he wasn't the first one because the previous x was like that as well, but just not in the same intensity. Merging your life with someone is incredibly sacred, and it's important, and is not to be taken lightly, so you gotta do your part, and it's also recognizing like I can't have somebody be responsible for my happiness period at the end of the day, my feelings in my sanity, I got a handle that that is my responsibility, and not I think is the biggest shift in Kwai. Entering any relationship now onward versus a previous version. That's so important, and that's so much expectation for someone right, so yeah, who knows what marriage even? Right yeah exactly. So, we'll be all of us. Open you back to dating now that we're like starting to exit quarantine. What's your plan? Are you still need more time? Me What? Whole podcast because I genuinely I mean I is matched with people again. None of it was taken seriously because we're in quarantine and I've noticed patterns about like Dom. Ask guys who are like asking to meet up and I'm like right saying well. We started alluding to this earlier and I. Think it's tough because you love to hear you've gone through, too, but I mentioned the time that I definitely took a lot longer to start dating again and then I remember like after my. My last relationship like Oh hell, no of not doing that again. That was such loss time so I remember booked date like a week after and I met up with this guy and I remember like on the date like there was something wrong with the date at all. It was totally fine. There was no chemistry, but there is nothing wrong and I. Just remember like losing it like I. Literally like went to the bathroom and started here up in an I like kind of. That I was ready to go, it's like winding down anyways I got and the Uber and I just burst out in tears and I was like okay. This is like I can't just jump right back in either. I was like Oh. I did the work last time like I can just go so I don't know what the answer is. I don't think there is like a set answer, but I think you kind of know when you're ready again like you're like excited. I think it's like when you're forcing it. That's when it's a bad situation. It doesn't usually end well because you're like growing. Is You feel like you have to to? were, but you're not excited about it and you are really ready. Right so I think when I'm. Finally get that. It's that you're like I. WanNa meet someone again like I think that's when it's like a great time to start I think so too, and it's a it's a. it's an evolution having self-awareness at each step right? You're kind of like you're dipping your toe back in. Yeah, because it was just like such a nightmare going part of it was fun. I'm like Oh. Wow, there's so many great people I genuinely think there's so many wonderful people out in the world, and to whatever degree you're going to connect with a person that is a complete question mark. You never know high greatest I. It doesn't mean you have. Doesn't mean you connect the same values your auto? You know that's all the mystery. Why again why? We have movies music and everything, but I also was like it was my first time participating Rodeo. To fame annoying triggers back to you, and I was like God. This is why hate the so much UA? 'CAUSE IT roadkill. I loved actor. Because I. Wants to be road though you have to like you, it's unfortunate that you have to, but like I know even now I like recently and did something and I like immediately got back on the APPS and I don't know. I started like talking to people. Think I really WANNA. Be doing this right now, so I'm still like this passive sitting duck on the APPS that I'm like sniping on people, and not really replying but I. am doing a phone call tonight so I'm starting to renting. You know I think. You're starting to hit it, but I had to be that person and I'm sure all those people that were messaging me getting no required like fuck this person, right? Guy What other date with that I was like literally ended up in tears had nothing to do with him. That's unfortunate, but you kinda need to do it to see where you're at and get that BA writer. Yes, duet with precaution, because don't forget. There is another human being that you're you're you're corresponding with and spoke as someone who has been road kill many times I. Don't want to be part of that situation like I've I've definitely met guys on APPs. We're like OH I. I went through a break up a few months ago. I'm I'm getting myself back out. There I'm feeling good and I don't know. Is that a red flag? I don't know if you're really ready, and they don't really know and I can't fault them for it, so I would just say yes. You should get it when you feel ready. Ish Getting yourself back out there. Just tread lightly and my. I like when when people tell me they may be ready to get back into. into dating I always say. How excited are you about meeting? Someone New Right now, not just for dating a new person in January and they say I feel I feel like it's daunting to meet a new person that I'm like you're not ready to date. You're not ready to go out there again, but if someone's like I'm genuinely excited, meet someone new to learn something from them platonic -ly than I'm like okay, maybe you are. You somewhat ready. We just can't forget that there. There were dealing with human beings here well. I think also when I took that like year off right like I was in I was just going through my own personal journey. Right so I was in therapy I was like getting over this devastating break-up like I was not someone that anyone would want to at that point, right and I also felt like for me. Because dating does bring up a lot of emotional stuff to on a good day like when you're like perfectly sound. ghosted or someone just like you know like there's so many things that can happen so I at least the way I was looking at it as I was like I am already on the brink of emotional anything. Extra that happens with dating. We'll just like. Send me over the edge, so I feel like for me I needed to get back into a place. That I had that South love. In could handle those ups and downs of dating emotional. That's very very wise. Jewelry and I think I. I'm of the same mind, maybe not as consciously, but increasingly like. Yeah, this is a lot of gone on a few virtual dates, and they're. They're pleasant. You know there. It was just a reminder like wow, get there really cool people out there again. It doesn't mean this is your future husband or Raymond. Somebody that you even maybe want meet up with real in real life. Person and again the criteria for that. It's really been tested for Kobe. But did you do an antibody test? But like where have you been since then? There's a lot more at stake right now. Think of all these hoops that we now have to run through. I think it's again. You measure you calibrate like the worthiness of this interaction bright in a different way. Then I'm like this is a waste of my life. said that the quarantine is the best thing to have to happen to you to put you in this space that you had to confront this. Spielberg virtual dating is perfect for where you're at right now. It's like low commitment, and also like okay like if you're not the person that is like I'm so ready to be there that you're really wasting people's time as much like getting on a call, versus like going on a date is different, very realistic, low investment. Yes, but also has been proven that video calls are extremely exhausting, probably more exhausting than in person. Can you elaborate on this? There's studies on this while like the zoom. Everyone's exhausted from zoom because you're young screen and there's something just you can't turn your attention away because it's very obvious when you do. Full attention. There's nothing distracting you can't like. It's not like you're at a bar and you can look at the people around you. You're just staring at this person. It gets very exhausting so again. Like your truth is whatever you're feeling in the moment, and if you feel like you want to meet some people you talk to them it by all means do it, but you also have to know yourself very well to to the point where you're like okay. Okay I think I should take a break or I can keep going with this so I think we should get into some takeaways because what I'm hearing from this and I hear this over, and over again is like when people when they're going through appeared loneliness or try and get over a break-up. They ramp up really fast, and then they over exhaust themselves on so many levels physically and mentally and I work in the fitness industry and this is. Is. A really interesting fact is that most people skip the cool down for workouts because they think they're like I. Already got the benefits from the workout by do I need to cool down? People who skip cool downs regularly gain more weight. Because when you overexert your body, your body is is creating cortisol, which then is turns into sugar, which then makes you gain weight, and what that really means is when you don't give your body the the rest. Rest that it needs your body actually goes against what you're trying to accomplish. And that's exactly how people to think about relationships, too, and dating and being alone. You have to give yourself. A break gotta take that downtime and cool down. Recover take a few days of rest, and then you can ramp up again. You can't keep spiking spiking spiking because it's actually counterproductive and what you're doing NGOs great because this is almost like this forced cool down for. Before, you get into that next workout again, but you've taken the time what I really appreciate about what your story is. You've taken the time to separate the relationship that you went through and what you're going through like what I'm hearing is you're going through this like identity. Evolution and that's very separate from your you getting over your break-up, they're. Two separate paths, which means you're on your own a path to really evolve your life, and you're gonNA. Come out of quarantine a new person and it doesn't mean that this is like. Oh, my Gosh, she's! She knows she's figured out dating, but you've having used his time just to think about like. What do I need to do to make this relationship work? It's more like what do I need to do to make my life. Life Work for what I'm trying to accomplish. That's very admirable. The love that I love that I think I was gonNA. Say a similar takeaway. It's like the this time can be the best thing for you. If you let it be and I think oftentimes we think about breakups, and just thinking about the negative and the devastation I think I think I'm an optimist, also that I feel like I always try to see like. Like, what can be good that comes out of it and I mean we've obviously pointed to so many reasons like within your story in other stories that we shared on this podcast today of just like how this can really transform you as a person and set you up for the relationship. You want so I. Think like even if you're not going through a break-up if you're in a situation where you're burnt out on dating. Dating or things have not been progressing the way that you want I. Think taking that time and not being afraid to feel like you're missing opportunities, and all the foam is coming in like quarantine. Is that best time because we had to, but it doesn't mean that now that things are restrictions. are starting to get lifted. It doesn't mean that you can't do it still like I did it when there was no quarantine. Over nineteen you'd like. It's not fun. It's fun to sit with your thoughts, but you have to do it to push through and I think like a lot of people at the beginning of quarantine were kind of freaking out because it was the first time that they weren't distracted like you didn't have an event to go. Do you didn't have a? Date to line up and you had to sit with your thoughts and I think it can be very very scary but I. think the rewards are so worth it. I completely agree are so great at these takeaways eloquent. Analyzed in like the best way possible I feel reborn and. I also want to be very encouraging because it is like both of you said it is, it's a process. It's not gonNA be comfortable, but I personally right now I can say I'm I feel like we're the happiest places I've been in for me personally, even though I'm definitely still struggling on a day-to-day basis, because the rest of the world is like a fricking dumpster fire right now, but I'm working on using whatever I have learned from my own personal experience whether even. Dating and self identity Rome but to apply it to all the turmoil that's arising in all all hannity right now whether that's health, related or economically related or cultural racism, and like all this shit is just like being purse right now, and it's a very macro version of like what I felt. I was going through on a micro level. Personally so in that way I feel like I can commiserate with dislike. This upheaval mall is being put out there, and so just to remain as much as I humanly can are of a roller like encouragement A. A lot of the healing that happens externally even systematically even up to the levels of lake, government happens internally I and there's so much that I wanna do an achieve both in a romantic relationship and outside of it, but all of those still are rooted within me the way that I in manage myself manage my feelings, my psyche. My sleep schedule my fitness the way I talked to myself, and so that's GonNa. Be on a very micro day to day basis. That is a lifestyle commitment. That's way beyond quarantine, and I think quarantine for helping facility. But, it's definitely not the end and I appreciate this Christmas moments, but. It an over, and and what else is like? Because because we're in this world, we're like literally. Anything goes now right like what is life. What is time what her? Rules like nothing applies more so in that way. If you're kind of like this crazy, we are blank canvas like let's do it the way we want to do. And I have gone again. What I, said blue. I'm doing self love stuff that I really genuinely looked at previously like Oh my God. This is like some Gwyneth paltrow she. says. This lady my pussy again. CRYSTALS DO I. Leaning in I think you said something. No that I do WanNa like. 'cause i. mean everything you just said was so important to hear, but you said something that you. You're happy right now and I. Think so often. We feel like we need to be in relationships to be happy. And I think what of one of the books that got me through my period. We actually had her as a guest on our show was from season six episode, fifteen meeting half orange, and it was an author. Amy Spencer, so I definitely recommend the book. Has she liked. Takes you through journaling exercises in. It's like imagining like the life that you want to have an. It's so amazing, but her whole point was like she was kind of like. Don't just get out there. Go date and do all this stuff. If the whole point to be in a relationship is to be happy, just like beeline for the happy and figure out what makes you happy in that? Usually when you end up attracting people anyways and asks relationships as when you're happy in your own skin, just doing life in being yourself. One thing the might take hopefully. If anyone's down to try I highly recommend doing it. The last few days is kind of changing. My life has doing all the affirmations enduring doing a lot of self care. My Skin's glowing more than. I'm doing mirror work and I been on affirmations, which is basically you know saying things like I am whole I am healthy I'm abundant i. am worthy saying these things to like to transform the voice in your head, which is usually the worst voice overs usually for sure hitting so hard and very judgmental, which is definitely has been knee, but doing your work is like looking at yourself deep in your own is telling yourself like Gee. I love you and your. And I got your back and I'm not gonNA. Let you down. You know no matter what happens you. I'm always here. Saying that to my face. I broke down crying because I never said that like the way I speak to somebody I love. Even you guys like you had a bad day. I could speak the best words of encouragement, and I would mean it one hundred ten percent, because I would look at you and see the best of both of you and senior praises and reassure you in comfort. You do that for myself I if anybody is willing to go, hi, it's really hard, but once you do it and get past the uncomfortable like what the hell am I doing right now. It really like I am feeling lighter. I'm feeling like I don't feel as lonely. That's a great tactic I. Love that takeaway because it's like the way the way you talk to yourself like. Would you ever talk to a friend that way like nicknamed? You're not the only person that struggles with that I. Think a lot of people struggle with that. Myself included end. Yeah, I think it's the mindset is everything we keep. We always say that on this podcast in the best way to change your. Your mindset is to change an inner dialogue. That's happening for you, right? That's really great. Walmart sidebar is like went I'm actually good with being alone. I actually genuinely enjoy my alone time a lot. Even though I little mom said loneliness, it just naturally raises standards because if lying, I would rather chill by myself. Reading or you're taking a walk listening to Arianna around and Lady Gaga. That's like more appealing than having a conversation with Xyz. Person Guy Friend whoever I'm fine, I'll just like I. Like. Take care have a good life I don't. I'm always do the I. always do the sit in bed with my dog test on rather rather be with this person or sit in bed with my dog, yeah! I've left a guy's house. Because I'm like I rather sit home with my dog. I remember like what I was going through my situation like I never really spent time alone before that and I think that's like pardon woman so difficult for me that I was like before when I wasn't dating him I was just like always going out I was always with friends. I was just always with someone. And I think I just because I was so down just depressed to be completely honest like I spent a lot more alone time and I started to like. It wasn't just alone depressed on the couch like I went and took trips by south like I went and doing. It was a big Love A. Good up to Calistoga by myself to like the hot springs treat myself, and honestly like I would go to the hot springs with friends after and I'm like I, prefer to go there myself. I would say once Roberta. Pool enough. I did enjoy your company, but I did like going myself to. And I think like finding that solstice in yourself in that honestly for me has made this quarantine a hell lot easier as someone that lives alone. was I guess primarily single entertaining some stuff, but I was primarily single in the time, but I think it made it a lot easier to be on my own. During this tough time because I had done it before where I I love it good for you and that's that's they like I'd rather be lonely than be lonely in a relationship right I. said that last week because we talk same thing and I genuinely appreciate all these learning lessons, it would be really really nice to have somebody that I'm excited to meet with. And I feel like you'll be that much more easy to identify once it happens you know being. An quite frankly on, it's not even just being along, but there so many important things happening right now I am very like involved in my community. I'm very involved in social justice stuff that I think you know we only if anything that quarantine in Kobe taught us is that life is not guaranteed, and we don't know when we're GONNA come and go and. Time in health in all of our energy is very precious, so I would like to allocate that well where I go to bed every night. Being like I think I sent that day well and I do as much as I love romance in. It has been the drug of choice. I also choosing those other things that I really am passionate about contributing my time to, and if I'm sorry, just like to a guy, it's like either you augment my life in make it like your arrested or an wastes or something that's enjoyable and fulfilling or feeds my passions or something like it doesn't add to that. There's other things that can really contribute myself to that justice fulfilling you know and I would love to have a wonderful hot. Great. All got it. Up they're like I. Don't want to settle. I don't WanNa I. Don't WanNa like go backwards. I in that way. I'm Mike. Really looking forward to the future right now is a really important time. I think for us to choir ties. There's a lot calling birds. Yes, absolutely em-. Prioritize how you treat yourself during this time to very very important, lovely very well said, and she's got many more words of wisdom on her podcasts first of all. Where can people find you? Get fired first of all the podcasts platforms on apple podcast, spotify Google, and all that fun stuff. I put a lot of feelings out there on my instagram. At Menzies Emi N. J. E. Easy Y I don't do as my social on my podcasts social, but working on it. Yeah, I'm out there. I love live talking with people, but also having boundaries know. Where I WANNA engage in where I just need a moment. You Day you catch. Gee If. If someone's new to your podcast, what's a good episode for them to start on? Let's say they're very curious about personal development. During this time one of my first episodes, people refer out about you. Guys like my first chunk of episodes I feel embarrassed because it was so clunky and I was like figuring out my voice in all the stuff, but there was one early on that. People bring up to me that I was like. Oh, it's called. Sorry, not sorry. It was me learning not to move politics for everything for literally existing. Existing and having a a declared thought that one's an interesting one that I guess other people have resonated with so maybe that's a good win. A lot of the recent ones have been about mental health about therapy of being really tough on yourself. Something that I'm processing in real time on my bike, a fantastic lovely. Okay, we're going to wrap this up. Thank you so much. Mindy for continuing the discussion you. You all need to listen to our conversation Mendis podcast. Because then a lot of this also makes sense, and literally is like the sequel. Episode. We're just really really nice for all of our listeners. Thank you for helping. US, provide US Open Forum to talk about our journeys and hearing different perspectives. If you like our podcast, please leave us a review in apple podcast. It's very helpful for us to source great guests such as Mindy because if she read the reviews and she's like oh I'm not anti podcast. She would have never come on, or you're gonNA, reading that literally takes two seconds. That would go. Away. French, yes, Tele Front or submit a story can go on digital podcast, dot, com, or you can email. US Hello at. Dot Com. Hey, we're going to wrap this up stay. Oh but dateable podcast is part of the FROLIC podcast network five more podcasts. You'll love at frolic. Dot Media Slash podcasts want to continue the conversation I follow us on Instagram facebook and twitter with the handle at dateable podcast tag us in any post with the Hashtag stay dateable and trust us. We look at all those post. Then head over to our website. dateable PODCASTS DOT COM there. You'll find all the episodes. Episodes as well as articles, videos and our coaching service with vetted industry experts, you can also find our premium why series where we dissect analyze an offer solutions to some of the most common dating conundrums also downloadable for free on spotify apple podcast Google play overcast stitcher, radio and other podcasts platforms. Your feedback is valuable to us, so don't forget to leave us a review and most importantly remember to stay dateable.