37 Burst results for "Minnesota."
9 Minutes and 29 Seconds: The Derek Chauvin Trial
"Thirty pm on may twenty fifth two thousand twani at the intersection of east thirty eighth street and chicago avenue in minneapolis. Minnesota was the aftermath of something. Horrific that had just occurred there. Donald williams was calling nine one one of the emergency designing killing In front of chicago He is pretty noisy. Guy wasn't the rest. Yeah neck the whole time. I'll do ninety man win. Went by breathing was arrested. Nothing you've already made green light these stupid. If not responsible when the ambulance you're area cattle. Donald was talking fast. He would later say he called nine one one because he didn't know what else to do about what he had just witnessed. He told the dispatcher that he saw a police officer quote pretty much. Just kill this guy. Who wasn't resisting arrest. He had his knee and this dude's neck the whole time. He said officer nine eighty-seven referring to the officer's badge number he had seen. He said the man hadn't been resisting that he was already in handcuffs when the officer knelt on him pinning him down on the ground then. The man stopped breathing and was non responsive when the ambulance came he said. Would you like to speak with us sergeant. That would go. What a wasn't the rest for. Let me get you over to the best thing for thing. Don't be his own off. Duty firefighter day. Your washing it. As well jacob go the one person he told the dispatcher he had been standing there watching with a woman who was an off duty firefighter. That woman told the officer to check the man for a pulse. He said but the officer refused
Fresh update on "minnesota." discussed on All Things Considered
"Safe storage is something we can do without needing major acts of Congress We should note in the Oxford township school shooting that the parents of the accused shooter have pleaded not guilty in the charges of involuntary manslaughter We've been listening to the voice of Jillian Peterson She's cofounder of the violence project and associate Professor of criminal justice at Hamlin university in St. Paul Minnesota Jillian Peterson is also a co author of the book the violence project how to stop a mass shooting epidemic that came out earlier this fall Professor Peterson thanks so much for joining us Thank you so much for having me Former Republican senator and GOP presidential candidate Bob Dole of Kansas has died He was 98 years old Bob Dole was a giant of the U.S. Senate where he rose to become majority leader and was one of the longest serving Republican Party leaders in the chambers history And don't work closely with Republican presidents from Richard Nixon to Ronald Reagan to George H. W. Bush to move their agendas through Congress Bob Dole was also one of the last living political leaders in America to have seen combat in World War II The wounds from that conflict helped shape the future senator But as Frank Morris of member station KC you are reports so did dolls deep ties to his hometown of Russell Kansas Pablo was born here in Russell Kansas July 22nd 1923.
Nets escape Timberwolves 110-105 behind Durant's 30
"Kevin Kevin Durant Durant delivered delivered thirty thirty points points in in the the nets nets fifty fifty victory victory in in six six games games a a one one ten ten one one oh oh five five down down into into the the timber timber walls walls to to rant rant was was twelve twelve of of thirteen thirteen from from the the line line in in leading leading five five nets nets with with at at least least ten ten points points Patty Patty mills mills finished finished with with twenty twenty three three points points it it was was a a real real orthodox orthodox top top of of flow flow to to the the game game that that that that you you know know we we just just couldn't couldn't get get into into any any rhythm rhythm for for for for anything anything James James harden harden contributed contributed twenty twenty with with nine nine assists assists and and seven seven rebounds rebounds Minnesota Minnesota led led one one oh oh one one ninety ninety nine nine until until Brooklyn Brooklyn scored scored the the next next six six points points the the wolves wolves were were competitive competitive despite despite the the absence absence of of Karl Karl Anthony Anthony towns towns because because of of a a bruised bruised tailbone tailbone deangelo deangelo Russell Russell led led the the Timberwolves Timberwolves with with twenty twenty one one points points while while Naz Naz Reid Reid and and Anthony Anthony Edwards Edwards each each had had nineteen nineteen I'm I'm Dave Dave Ferrie Ferrie
Fresh update on "minnesota." discussed on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me
"Complete a program like this are 40% less likely to get a ticket again The city estimates more than 5000 people qualify for this program Connecticut reported its first confirmed case of the variant of the coronavirus and it may be linked to an anime convention in New York City last month Governor Ned Lamont announced last night that the case involved a man in his 60s from the Hartford area who started showing mild symptoms on November 27th a family member of the man was in New York City between November 17th and the 22nd to attend the anime NYC 2021 convention The family member developed symptoms on the 21st that have since resolved both individuals were vaccinated according to Lamont's office Health officials also reported a Minnesota man tested positive for the variant after he returned home from the convention Showers likely for the overnight with temperatures rising to around 50° and mostly cloudy for Monday showers likely and warmer with a high near 60 Support for NPR comes from Lafayette imports bringing Plymouth gin to the U.S. from England southwest coast Plymouth gin is distilled using a blend of 7 botanicals including Juniper berry coriander seed and citrus peel Plymouth gin since 1793 On the next Brian Mayer show Rebecca tracer from New York magazine on what might come now after the Supreme Court's roe versus weighted Mississippi abortion law hearing And why she thinks the Democrats could have used abortion rights more effectively against Donald Trump's Supreme Court nominees Also what are Biden's real omicron COVID options The Brian lehrer show weekdays at 10 a.m. on WNYC The.
Mostly white jury seated for trial in Daunte Wright's death
"A a jury jury has has been been seated seated for for the the trial trial of of a a former former police police officer officer charged charged in in the the shooting shooting death death of of Dante Dante right right you you are are upholding upholding the the constitution constitution the the very very foundation foundation of of our our democracy democracy it it had had been been county county judge judge Regina Regina choose choose thank thank yours yours who who will will be be considering considering first first and and second second degree degree manslaughter manslaughter charges charges against against Kim Kim potter potter a a white white former former police police officer officer in in Brooklyn Brooklyn center center Minnesota Minnesota potter potter has has said said she she meant meant to to use use her her taser taser instead instead of of her her gun gun in in the the April April eleventh eleventh shooting shooting of of right right a a black black motorist motorist after after he he tried tried to to drive drive away away while while officers officers were were trying trying to to arrest arrest him him nine nine of of the the twelve twelve jurors jurors seated seated are are white white and and to to identify identify as as Asian Asian the the only only black black person person on on the the jury jury lives lives near near a a shopping shopping center center that that was was damaged damaged in in the the unrest unrest following following Wright's Wright's death death she she is is a a permitted permitted gun gun owner owner who who also also carries carries a a small small purple purple stun stun gun gun in in her her purse purse she she said said the the video video of of potter potter shooting shooting right right structure structure is is chaotic chaotic and and wondered wondered how how potter potter could could have have such such a a lapse lapse of of judgment judgment with with three three years years of of experience experience on on the the force force opening opening statements statements are are scheduled scheduled for for Wednesday Wednesday I'm I'm Jennifer Jennifer king king
Omicron coronavirus variant found in multiple US states
"At at least least five five states states are are now now reporting reporting the the presence presence of of the the Omicron Omicron variant variant of of the the corona corona virus virus and and doctors doctors are are warning warning the the delta delta variants variants still still remains remains the the biggest biggest threat threat there there are are a a crime crime cases cases in in at at least least three three boroughs boroughs in in New New York York City City this this is is not not a a cause cause for for major major alarm alarm I I need need to to say say that that because because we we do do not not have have enough enough information information governor governor Kathy Kathy hopeful hopeful says says the the only only way way to to slow slow the the spread spread is is for for people people to to get get vaccinated vaccinated booster booster shots shots and and wear wear their their masks masks indoors indoors and and when when you you can can avoid avoid large large gatherings gatherings a a case case in in Minnesota Minnesota is is now now linked linked to to New New York York a a man man who who was was one one of of fifty fifty thousand thousand attending attending an an anime anime convention convention at at the the Javits Javits center center president president Biden Biden says says the the U. U. S. S. is is tightening tightening testing testing on on foreign foreign travelers travelers expanding expanding vaccine vaccine accessibility accessibility and and pushing pushing for for more more at at home home and and in in school school testing testing which which can can allow allow students students to to stay stay in in a a classroom classroom full full health health official official in in Maine Maine says says Omicron Omicron is is a a spark spark on on the the horizon horizon but but the the delta delta variant variant is is the the fire fire that's that's here here today today with with some some eighty eighty six six thousand thousand new new cases cases every every day day nationwide nationwide hi hi Jackie Jackie Quinn Quinn
Biden Says 'Lockdowns' Not Needed to Curb Coronavirus Variant
"John Kennedy, well, let's start with Justin Trudeau, premiere of Canada. I'm a crime is actually in Canada. Not in the United States yet. Cut number 19. Obviously, we're watching very, very closely at the situation with el Macron. We know that even though Canada has very strong border measures now. We need vaccinations to come to Canada. We need pre departure tests. We do testing on arrival. There may be more we need to do, and we'll be looking at it very carefully. Are we going to ban more flights? Are we going to ban more many walked away? Because he doesn't know any more than you know other than Moderna CEO says we're screwed. Joe Biden, Dakota county, Minnesota went up there, and this is what he said cut number 20 from the president. As I told the American people yesterday, this new variant is a cause of concern, but not a cause to panic. On Thursday, I'll put forward a detailed strategy outline in how we've gone, we're going to fight this COVID this winter, not with shutdowns and lockdowns with more widespread vaccination. Boosters testing a much more. In the meantime. It sounds to me like deputy president Ron klain got the President Biden. And said, here's what we're going to do. It's what I'm doing. Urge everyone to get vaccinated because Delta is out there. And delta could kill you. We have about 850 deaths a day average right now in the United States. They're all Delta. And the vast majority of them are people who aren't vaccinated. You want to play poker with your life. I can't talk you out of it, but we're a long past having the government shut things down and closed schools because the cost of those are now well known and they're terrible.
US expected to toughen testing requirement for travelers
"Hi hi Mike Mike Rossi Rossi a a reporting reporting the the U. U. S. S. is is expected expected to to toughen toughen corona corona virus virus testing testing requirements requirements for for international international travelers travelers concerned concerned about about the the new new Omicron Omicron variant variant of of Kobe Kobe in in nineteen nineteen the the by by did did ministration ministration is is considering considering more more rigorous rigorous requirements requirements for for international international travelers travelers to to the the United United States States although although Omicron Omicron has has not not yet yet been been detected detected in in the the U. U. S. S. it it has has been been identified identified more more than than twenty twenty countries countries speaking speaking in in Minnesota Minnesota Tuesday Tuesday president president Joe Joe Biden Biden said said on on Thursday Thursday I'll I'll put put forward forward a a detailed detailed strategy strategy outlined outlined how how we've we've gone gone we're we're going going to to fight fight this this covert covert this this winter winter not not with with shutdowns shutdowns a a lockdown lockdown although although some some details details could could still still change change a a senior senior administration administration official official who who spoke spoke on on condition condition of of anonymity anonymity tells tells the the AP AP under under consideration consideration is is a a requirement requirement that that all all air air travelers travelers to to the the U. U. S. S. B. B. tested tested for for covert covert nineteen nineteen within within a a day day of of boarding boarding their their flight flight Mike Mike Rossi Rossi at at Washington Washington
Hartman scores in 3rd straight; Wild beat Lightning 4-2
"The the wild wild doubled doubled up up the the lightning lightning forty forty two two is is Ryan Ryan Hartman Hartman broke broke a a two two all all tie tie midway midway through through the the third third period period Hartman Hartman scored scored for for the the third third straight straight game game and and has has goals goals in in five five of of his his last last six six giving giving him him twelve twelve on on the the season season Nick Nick bjugstad bjugstad Victor Victor asking asking Marcus Marcus fully fully know know also also scored scored for for Minnesota Minnesota which which has has won won three three in in a a row row cam cam Talbot Talbot made made twenty twenty eight eight saves saves for for the the wild wild Corey Corey Perry Perry and and Alex Alex killorn killorn did did the the scoring scoring for for Tampa Tampa Bay Bay Andrei Andrei vasilevskiy vasilevskiy stopped stopped thirty thirty three three shots shots for for the the lightning lightning which which had had won won three three in in a a row row and and six six of of seven seven on on the the ferry ferry
Ava White: Four boys arrested in Liverpool on suspicion of murdering 12-year-old - Sky News
"A thirteen year old boys been taken into custody in Minnesota for accidentally shooting to death of five year old child it happened in the Minneapolis suburb of Brooklyn park the reason behind the shooting is troubling police say the thirteen year old was with several other children and making a video to post on social media with a gun local media are reporting it was a rifle from inside the home and that investigators believe the thirteen year old accidentally fired it striking a five year old relative in the head efforts to save him were unsuccessful the shooting took place on thanksgiving night the young gunman was taken into custody in the morning and placed in the Hennepin county juvenile detention center police say it's possible the owner of the gun will also face charges I
Omar seeks action over House colleague's remarks on Muslims
"Minnesota congresswoman ill hunt Omar is demanding house leaders take appropriate action against a Republican congresswoman who made derogatory references to Omar's Muslim faith Democrat bill Han Omar is a member of the so called squad a group of progressive newer members of Congress Colorado Republican Lauren bow perch in a video posted on Twitter referred to her as a member of the jihad squad a reference to an Islamic holy war also making a comment about her colleague Omar near an elevator saying they were fine because she didn't have a backpack viewed as a reference to a suicide bomber the remarks at a constituents meeting drew laughter although Bo Burton did apologize congresswoman Omar is calling on leaders of the house to take appropriate action saying normalizing bigotry not only endangers her life but the lives of all Muslims adding anti Muslim bigotry has no place in Congress I'm Jackie Quinn
Florida Has the Lowest COVID Cases Compared to Democrat States
"We talked about what's worked and what hasn't and how not to let absurdity win in your community again And in your state again And I evidenced my points by my state the free state of Florida which for 5 consecutive weeks in these states united has had the fewest population adjusted cases in the country Also these states with the highest population adjusted cases right now happen to be blue states Michigan Minnesota where you are 11 to about 13 times more likely to catch COVID-19 than you are here in my free state of Florida Also illustrating that there are 18 states with higher vaccination rates Than Florida that have more cases in many cases multiples more cases in real time And also take a look at the senior population The largest senior population of any state in the country and Florida And yet according to the World Health Organization when you take a look at life expectancy during the pandemic Florida's has been well above the national average and the point is this as we get ready for Biden's new dark winter Is that lockdowns don't work It's been evidenced The vaccines are not a panacea even if they may be at best a tool in the toolkit And we have other health considerations that need to be accounted for starting with mental health Something else we discussed in the first hour of the
Vaccines making Thanksgiving easier, but hot spots remain
"Vaccines are making this year's thanksgiving a lot easier than last year but there are some hot spots throughout the country the U. S. is certainly in better shape approaching its second thanksgiving of the pandemic thanks to the vaccine but some cold weather regions are reporting surges of covert nineteen cases that could get worse in the days ahead as families traveled to be with loved ones nearly two hundred million Americans are fully vaccinated but that leaves tens of millions that have not gotten the shot hospitals in the upper Midwest especially Michigan and Minnesota are filled with covert nineteen patients who are mostly unvaccinated New Mexico Colorado Utah Montana and Wyoming also ranked high in cases I'm surely employer
Bucs handle Giants...Magic blown out...Comeback honors
"AP sports I'm David Shuster the Phoenix Suns got off to a slow start this NBA season but they are in high gear now riding a thirteen game winning streak following Monday's one fifteen one eleven victory at San Antonio elsewhere Memphis scored the final seven points in their win on the road at Utah one nineteen one eighteen other winners included Brooklyn Charlotte Atlanta Boston Milwaukee Minnesota Indiana and Philadelphia who defeated Sacramento off the court lebron James and I'd say it's stored both suspended following their altercation Sunday James getting one game store getting too on the collegiate level this week's a people has Gonzaga at UCLA at numbers one and two both played in one Monday night inside a one oh seven fifty four over central Michigan UCLA seventy five sixty two over Bellarmine Gonzaga and UCLA face off later this week and then pro football Tom Brady keeps rolling on the seven time Super Bowl champion had a pair of touchdown passes is Tampa Bay blew out the New York Giants thirty to ten I'm David Shuster AP sports
Faulk, Blues jump on Golden Knights in 1st period, win 5-2
"The seamless please scored five unanswered goals after falling behind early to beat the Vegas golden knights five due to rain Riley Tyler Bozak Justin Faulk Brandon Saad nickel Michaelis scored to give St Louis its second win in its last six games fox goal the game winner was the one hundredth of his NHL career Chandler Stephenson Reilly Smith scored in the first seven minutes as Vegas lost for just the second time in its last seven contests St Louis sits one point behind central division leader Minnesota David Solomon St Louis
Virus surge worsens in Midwest as states expand boosters
"A surge in corona virus cases is worsening and parts of the Midwest in Michigan some schools are taking next week off for the thanksgiving holiday instead of just three days in Detroit the school district says it's switching to online learning on Fridays in December only thirty five percent of eligible residents in Detroit are fully vaccinated in Minnesota at the defense department is sending medical teams to two hospitals next week to immediately treat patients and help we're a health care workers cold weather states like New Hampshire North Dakota have seen a spike in cases one warmer weather state Arizona has more than ninety percent of inpatient hospital beds occupied about fifty nine percent of the population is fully vaccinated or about one hundred ninety five million Americans I bet Donahue
Cases surge in new COVID hot spots of Michigan, Minnesota
"Pockets of corona virus outbreaks are being reported in the northeast upper Midwest and the Rockies prompting new pleas for people to get vaccinated and be vigilant during thanksgiving gatherings hospitals in Michigan and Minnesota a reporting a spike in coal bit patience hospital beds are filling fast new York's governor reports an eight percent spike included cases in western rural areas a direct correlation between people being vaccinated and the infection rate governor Kathy hopeful says for upcoming family gatherings are the vaccine that is a fair conclusion amid question asked in a grammar gramme for there I take the time right now to make sure that they got their booster shot nationwide there are about forty thousand covert hospitalizations half the number reported at the height of the delta surge but with colder weather and approaching holidays health experts are urging precautions I'm Jackie Quinn
NHL outbreak...Steelers virus cases...Packers stock
"AP sports I'm guessing cool block Jimmy Garoppolo's when the forty Niners spoiled the rams debuts of von Miller and Odell Beckham junior with a thirty one ten win that San Francisco or upload tossed two touchdowns while Jimmie ward picked off LA quarterback Matthew Stafford twice Miller recorded three tackles well bekommen there's two catches for eighteen yards chase young season is officially over after the Washington football team announced the reigning defensive rookie of the year will undergo surgery after injuring his right leg during Sunday's upset of Tampa Bay in Major League Baseball news the Tigers agreed to a five year seventy seven million dollar deal with former red Sox left hander Eduardo Rodriguez according to an AP source the NHL has postponed three Ottawa senators games this week due to a Colbert nineteen outbreak that place ten players and cope with protocol in the NBA fined the Minnesota Timberwolves two hundred fifty thousand dollars after the team arranged a September work out for players in Miami in violation of league rules get some cool bar AP sports
Cousins throws 2 TDs, Vikings bounce back to beat Chargers
"The Vikings came away with a twenty seven twenty win over the Chargers as Kirk cousins threw a pair of touchdown passes to Tyler Conklin who like the wide open offense conditions if there's an office want to come out and be aggressive that's a big thing for us this week as you know being aggressive and not just being aggressive the staying aggressive I think we did a good job doing that today cousins completed twenty five of thirty seven for two hundred ninety four yards Dalvin cook rushed for ninety four yards in helping the foreign five bikes and a two game skid Justin Jefferson had nine receptions for one hundred forty three yards from Minnesota which had five players on the call the nineteen list Justin Herbert was twenty of thirty four for one hundred ninety five yards with a touchdown and an interception for the five and four Chargers who have dropped three of their last four I'm Dave Ferrie
Anaheim Ducks general manager resigns, enters alcohol abuse program
"Anthony Edwards for their sixth straight win another NHL teams had to replace its long time general manager because of off ice issues Bob Murray resigned as GM of the Anaheim ducks after thirteen years in that role and one day after he was placed on administrative leave amid an investigation into his workplace conduct Marie plans to enter a treatment program for alcohol abuse Jeff Solomon will be the interim GM in the NFL Carolina Panthers quarterback Sam Darnold will miss at least four weeks with a right shoulder injury P. J. Walker will start in this place Minnesota Vikings running back Dalvin cook will practice and play with the team while the NFL investigates a civil lawsuit filed against them by a former girlfriend I'm
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Welcome and thank you for listening. Welcome to another episode resistance and color guest. Today is not hasher who goes by the pronouns. She says he's a graduate of the university of minnesota where she studied political science economics public health and throughout the time in college. She not only participated in student government. But she also entered for county government and was part of congressional campaigns. She's kinda working diversity and inclusion specialist at the intercostal mutual assistance association. I am a which primarily serves immigrant and refugee communities. She'll be moving to boston in august and we'll be pursuing a master's degree in public health at boston. University meshing of concentrate in human rights and social justice as well as health policy and law she would like to organize and do grassroots level work in the future and work specifically with children addressing adverse childhood experiences. Thank you for joining us. I pay day. Thank you for joining us. That's asha welcome. Thanks for having me. I've scraped to be year super on the first question. We like to ask And i think maybe list discussion so many times. But i think it's nice to hit from different people as well. What would you define resistance and color asked is honestly a great question I think one thing that i definitely directly. Tie it with In addition to resilience. Which i know we'll talk about later is privilege so even though Always on this. Call our people color. And i am a woman of color. I feel so because of the experiences. I've had and because of the opportunities i've had it's i have a role in helping other folks who don't have those same opportunities I think a lot of times when we're helping marginalized communities. They'd rather look to other folks of color than their white counterparts..
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Time. I also want to add that if anyone who's interacting with a community that is not that has any type of diversity inclusion your company or your organization should represent that as well not absolutely make sense for a bunch of straight white men to go into like different parts of the world. That don't have those people as a majority of their population and tried to talk to them or communicate with them and understand that because they can't because they don't have their yeah is so beautifully put like a course. You're the company sugarless like the population demographics. That's all i'm saying. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah and i think you say culprit but i think actually even in the in the nonprofit sector to some of these things out as as well. I worked in a nonprofit. And i think you you see that as well and i wonder i wonder now because direct female. I wonder if that changes how with into your research. I would be curious to find out what that looks like too. I wanted to go back to something that you had said earlier. And we live the capitalism for hanging on pause for a little bit. It's much now lives. And so focusing on the different ways that you identify and how those become relevant in different context. We have an n. Listening this podcast is a product of a multicultural. Young adults advisory board With non minnesota and one of the things that this board and i guess hopes to do is have conversations are admitted to health that in many ways in line with what. You're talking about intersection. -ality looking at mental health through different cultural lenses because mental health and expenses about mental health and identities are not the same with different cultural groups so looking at that and thinking about experiences with your identities and with how you feel those different identities impact you or your you end or your communities mental.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Bring him back to Minnesota and get him help and luckily had a good judge that let us do that. But then later he's had two times in court and one time was mental health court. Which is a wonderful court? And that was due to something he did when he was psychotic, and that was all about treatment and we were. You know I thought that was a while of an experience mental health court in Ramsey county. But then just a couple of years ago. He had another episode where he was very very sick and high on drugs and committed another low level crime, but he ended up in Criminal Court. And that? We are very mad about because he should have been in in mental health court. he's doing really well with everything that they're requiring of him. And if you're mental health court, his crime would be a racist. You know but steady ends up with this criminal record, which will dog him for employment housing anything for the rest of his life. That's wrong and It shouldn't happen to anyone right right. Exactly Jim. How do you see street drugs as complicating the lives of of people like yourself and others who have mental illnesses? I think I I wouldn't have come down with my ls. Either at all or severe is early if I had any used. Illicit drugs in high school and college. And Mindy. When did you start thinking about writing this book and start working on it well? I actually didn't think about writing it at all. Until I retired from the legislature, I didn't have time, but I had. And when did you return? I retired six years ago in twenty thirteen. Okay, and I had but I'd always kept a journal I started out just trying to keep track of gyms, doctors and the phone numbers, but then I started writing my thoughts. You know it was kind of a release for me. So when I retired, a friend of mine was in a writing group at the loft literary, center and she said. Why don't you join our writing group? You know you could write about a lot of things. Just come and so I. Started going to that and. I found that it continued to be a release for me to write, and I didn't even start writing about mental illness to begin with I wrote about other topics, but it just kind of happened through taking classes. They're getting input the Catharsis of writing so six years later here. I have a book kind of a surprise to me to agree. That's great. Jim. How did you feel about your mother? Writing this book? I guess about now's not terrible. I A little bit of mixed feelings. I mean it's kind of lake. To share what he'd by my life out there. by Bob. The legislator I've always been kind of. A little bit of. Our family's been in the public spotlight. A little bit nothing nothing really big, but So if you Google me on the Internet and find the most positive stuff about me because of. Articles that have been written in some things that people quit quite right so I am a little bit of these phase, but yes, there helps people that's good. Yeah well. It will help people, so I'm glad you can see the. Positive side of being involved with it I think it's always very important that people are sharing personal stories. Mindy. When do you expect the book to be launched? Well this fall for sure there. The University of Minnesota Press is the publisher and they have told me they're shooting for October tenth. Worldwide Mental Health Awareness Day. So I hope that's the date and it doesn't get pushed back further. Okay, so we're hoping for the fall of twenty twenty. Yes, sir. And Mindy. Are you thinking of writing anymore books? This one was exhausting I. Say Brian, so I'm kind of thinking. This might be at never say no. I've learned her, but I'm not to thinking about it. And then one last question I'll ask each of you, Jim. What gives you hope for yourself? Then for other people living with mental illnesses, all that's tough I I deal with a lot of. Big questions like existential stuff, so armee thinker but. I guess just a little levers of of whole positive as in feeling good. That's really about it. Okay in Mindy. What gives you hope for Jim and other people well. I just have seen a quantum shift in the amount of legislators working on mental illness. The advocacy groups have become powerful when I first started working. They were kind of under the radar, working in the shadows, and now they're. Kick, but powerful organizations that that legislators listen to. So that gives me hope and just the fact that young people are open and talking about their mental illnesses, celebrities are coming forward. And Jim at the present time is doing really well, so that gives me hope excellent. Well..
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"She discusses her diagnoses of Anorexia chronic major depression, panic and anxiety, disorder and post traumatic stress disorder PTSD. This. Conversation is focused on her experience using cognitive behavioral therapy CBT. Similar to part three of this series, the last episode with Dani Evans in which he talked about exposure therapy as type of see bt Lisa also talks about exposure therapy for some basic information and facts about CBT. Please take a look at some of the fact. Sheets published by NAMI MINNESOTA, which are available for free at Phnom E. M., N. Dot Org. Go to the education slash awareness. Menu Tab then click on fact sheets. You'll see cognitive behavioral therapy in the treatment section, which is the third section of the fact sheets you may also want to read the fact sheet on obsessive compulsive disorder OCD which includes a brief description of exposure response therapy ert. If you, WANNA listen to some of that instead of reading it online, go back to the previous episode with Dani Evans and listen to the intro before our conversation begins. This conversation was recorded may fourteenth two thousand twenty. Thanks so much for being with us today in recording this conversation. Let's. Get started by telling listeners a little bit about your connection with nominee, Minnesota and and your involvement tells more about that. Well I after experiencing a little Liz for about. Thirty five years I was looking to give back to make a difference to. Fight the stigma and I began looking for the right outlet. NAMI was by far the most inclusive, the most wide ranging it had programs were unprecedented. In Minnesota. United suppose nationwide, but I started at. In, your, own voice speaker, and shortly thereafter the speaker's Bureau and joined the Legislative Committee. I also was just so impressed with our executive director. Sue after holden that I N programs coercion the opportunities to make a difference. I was very excited to be a part of the nominee organization. Awesome and had you happen to I don't know if you've. Lived in other states, and had nominee exposure in other states, or is it all been in Minnesota? I have lived in Minnesota my entire life, okay? How did you end up trying CBT? Well actually a years ago. I was in a residential treatment a facility for Anorexia. And it I learned about T.. They had some worksheets, but it was. It was more of a class. It wasn't really. Practicing or implementing that therapy. Years later when I saw a very confident psychiatrist, who also access my therapist. did not. He knew I was very wary of therapy. So he did not actually. Say, that's try see bt, but in a very What would you cut subtle manner? He employed all of the. You know. He employed that sort of the models. Yeah, it's. Andy. Actually see bt without naming it if you will. That's something that have been curious about different people's People's different experiences like do they even know they're receiving that model of therapy, or is it just sort of happening behind the scenes? So That's interesting to hear. Yes. and was it was it focused on Anorexia was it focused on other specific. struggles that you wanNA share, or is it just general? We started with my. Struggle with the disease of Anorexia because at that time I. that's that's all I could think my mind. Twenty four seven was about food, weight shape and thought I was my disease. But, as we you know, and it actually took years for me to change my way of thinking and. You know identify situations be no wasn't given in touch with emotions or feelings so any again. Thinking as I said, but I also experience chronic major depression. And Panic and anxiety, disorder and PTSD. Again needs the same steps in CVT. Help those situations as well. How would you as a person receiving? The therapy. How would you describe it to someone else? Well, I would describe it as. Almost imperative to. Changing the way you think about certain situations that are traveling especially within a mental illness it is. For those who. I was delusional in my thinking. And, so I couldn't even reshape that inaccurate negative. Way, of thinking. And I would highly recommend as a find it. Evidence based, which is very important to me. evidence based care and it would be a big reason. Why would make that referral? At what point? Did you. Realize. The model therapy that that was being used to say it was sort of like behind the scenes being used. Did. When did you come to understand that it was more specifically see bt? Well it that's very good question because What I was introduced to exposure therapy I said you know you're. In a very late, hearted manner I. Said What what's your? What's your mode here? And he did mention cognitive behavioral therapy. And you know I tease him saying you really pulled on me. So. I was really into Authenticity. Let's figure this out by the those are the that's the steps that he did use CVT. So the exposure therapy was sort of down the road in the in within the therapy, and that's when he spoke Monroe CBT. Correctly. and am I correct that exposure therapy is a type of CVT. Has that right? Part of it. And that was it was it was it was part of? It is definitely a guy said after years of. because of the length of I disease. It took years for me to get to that point. Could you say a little bit more about that. In terms of were the obstacles along the way for you. To obstacles along the way was really identifying. My delusional thinking and my. I thought I couldn't. I was so my thoughts were instinctive. There was no. Here's a here's. Be here. See, what do you do about it? It was you know breaking through. Those The inaccurate thinking, even that even convincing me that I was having inaccurate thinking. And it often, we had to work on that work on that Intel I could identify. Any often used you know. What would you tell your friends? Would you ever talk like this to your friend? which was very helpful in reshaping may think he now. That's interesting. Yeah, yeah, and I think we're. We'd probably be nicer to our friends than we are ourselves sometimes. Oh definitely definitely. Like I said earlier it with because. ANOREXIA is.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Dot Org. Few navigate to the Education Slash Awareness Menu Tab Then you can see the link to fax sheets the CBT fact sheets in the third section the treatment section there's a version for adults and version for youth and read this fact sheet on CBS it's not very long about seven paragraphs and then also after this interview I was looking at the fact sheet on obsessive compulsive disorder OCD, which Danny talks about, and and that fact sheet it talks about how there are two types of psycho. Therapy's that are helpful for cheating. And it lists exposure in response therapy not. As well as cognitive behavioral therapy CVT so on that fact sheets listing those as two separate things. And just a short paragraph on the ERT exposure in response therapy the fact sheet it says Ert exposes a person to the cause of their anxiety. For example, a person with a fear of germs may be asked by a doctor or therapist to their hand on something considered dirty such as a doorknob afterwards they will refrain from washing their hands. The length of time between touching the DOORKNOB and washing hands becomes longer and longer That's just a a paragraph on the. Fact Sheet about. OCD and then I'm going to read the CBT factsheet. And then we'll move onto the conversation. I had with Dani, Evans. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy C. is an empirically supported treatment that focuses on patterns of thinking that are maladaptive and the beliefs that underlie such thinking for example, a person who is depressed may have the belief I'm worthless, and a person with a phobia may have the belief. I am endanger while the person in distress likely holds such beliefs with great conviction with a therapists. Therapists help the individual is encouraged to view such beliefs as hypotheses rather than facts and to test out such beliefs by running experiments, furthermore, those in distress are encouraged to monitor and log thoughts that pop into their minds called automatic thoughts in order to enable them to determine what patterns of biases in thinking exist and to develop more adaptive alternatives to their thoughts. People who seek CBT can expect their therapist to be active problem focused and goal directed studies of CBT have demonstrated its usefulness for a wide variety of problems, including mood disorders, anxiety, disorders, personality, disorders, eating disorders, Substance Abuse Disorders and psychotic disorders. While a full description of treatment and presenting problems, for which it is useful is beyond the scope of this brief overview, a brief summary of several treatments will be presented, CBD has been shown to be as useful as anti depressant medication for individuals with depression, and is superior in preventing relapse patients, receiving CBT for depression are encouraged to schedule activities in order to increase the amount of pleasure. They experience in addition. Depressed patients learn how to restructure negative thought patterns in order to interpret their environment in a less biased way. CPT for bipolar disorder is used as an adjunct to Maj Medication Treatment and focuses on psycho education about the disorder and understanding cues and triggers for relapse. Studies indicate that patients who receive CBT in addition to treatment with medication have better outcomes than patients who do not receive CBT adjunctive treatment. CBT is also useful treatment for anxiety disorders, patients who experience persistent panic attacks are encouraged to test out believes they have related to such attacks such as specific fears related to bodily sensations and to develop realistic responses to such beliefs. This treatment is very effective for those who experience such problems. Patients who experience obsessions and compulsions are guided to expose themselves to what they fear and beliefs surrounding their fears are identified and modified. The same is true for people with phobias, including phobias of animals or phobias of evaluation by others termed social, phobia. Those in treatment are exposed to what they fear and beliefs that have served to maintain such fears are targeted for modification. I'M GONNA. Stop reading the fact sheet there. There's a little more you can read that online if you'd like and I certainly encourage people to take a look at all the other fact, sheets that are available on the nominee Minnesota website Nami dot org. and we'll move into this conversation I had with Danny. It was recorded on April seventeenth. Two, thousand twenty enjoy. Danny thanks for joining us today new start by telling our listeners a little background about yourself. specifically how you got involved with Nami when that was and what? You're doing now with Nami. Sure I perform a rap style of poetry, called Gift Wrap. Poetry and I take mental illness and addiction awareness. And I performed a couple of times the non walk. In two thousand, eighteen, nineteen on the side where people pass and just perform. And I've also performed some some support classes. Family to family group Yes. My wife led a couple of those, and she invited me to to do poems, and tell my story of recovery, and I also do in our own voice, which is a program by Nami where I give my story or testimony to different audiences, and I'm recovery from mental illnesses, including bipolar depression, anxiety and Kind worried now okay. and then so you mentioned family to family in. Was that the the family to family twelve class that they had to in on one part. Yes came in. I in twice more each year. That's cool. Yeah, I just wanted to to point out to listeners. The distinction between Nami has the family to Family Class A twelve week class, and then there are also family support groups ongoing that you don't need to register for so there's two different things there and then in our own voice. That's awesome that you're doing that. Getting out and sharing personal recovery stories. and then so did you call it gift wrap poetry. Yet rat poetry OK P dropped wr up. And they went before. Do you just use your own name or do you have any sort of stage name or My stage name is Dan Tripoli. It goes along with my initials and. Album today on April seventeenth. That talks about. Family God and recovery because my faith and Gardiner important in my mental illness recovery so. I kind of just. It's fast poetry, but there's no music to it. This is my studio recorded album called Dad Tripoli because we just had a kid. My son Isaac back in August and he's been an inspiration for me and it's just awesome so cool she's. So. Can you tell me and listeners how you ended up? See bt. Yeah So the form I did was exposure therapy, and it was a a therapist were I used to live in Texas suburb Dallas. Got Interest introduced to in high school in Early College. I worked at target at the time, and it was always afraid of. Straightening the aisles and stuff like that and. especially like. Aisles with glass liked lightbulb. And because sometimes I find broken glass. No be afraid of. That I would hurt somebody if I didn't clean up all the way or like obsessive compulsive disorder, and I have intrusive.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Actually just went to play yesterday Paranormal brothers. If you haven't gone to go go to. It's really bad. Yeah so what I'm hearing is that you know self care for you is breaking down to why what what makes you happy happy as opposed to like what's can as opposed to the narrative that's been share which is like pampering yourself and you know that right but I think a lot for are different people. It means different things for example for me it means how do I preserve myself right. How do I make sure that I'm able to put maximum output to my community Marie so that I can make an impact and be able to sustain myself as my former self care? I am for you. It's your former self care is being able to just be happy right and during what would you like to do in order to be happy being with people being with people and being with people I love. I've also found that you know not just you know just because you love someone does mean. They're healthy for you. You know Case in point family honestly Yeah so for me. It's like being being with people that I enjoy being with and Doing things that I enjoy doing lake. I there are lots of things I enjoy doing like going to movies. Movies going to plays You know hanging with friends going out to parties and stuff like that In doing that more you know but not doing it responsibly. Though because I do it there's a fine line you know Yeah I feel like you're also touching base thought the fine line between like. How do you socialize with people in in order to be in the community as opposed artery socialize people in order to distract yourself from your own? Yes right that's a very online to like to be. I want to thank you for like surfacing that because I think oftentimes you know we talked self care while like doing things. Thanks for yourself. But there's things that you do for yourself are healthy and there's things that you'd reach for yourself that may not necessarily be healthy and long terms and things you really like brought auto so other lasting that you want to share before we close out this episode for anyone who is thinking about were wondering about antidepressants. It's not as scary as people. Make it out to be if you feel you need it. Do it for yourself for additional no resources related to this episode. Please check the podcast show notes and visit Nami Minnesota Online at Phnom E. M. N. Dot Hort. You've been listening to wellness and color on the mental health in Minnesota podcast produced by NAMI MINNESOTA..
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Your podcasts and now here's your host Nami Minnesota staff member Caroline ludi welcome to wellness and color. They give much for having me. Thank you our guest. Today is one thousand nine hundred a university student Salyan Bay and again so I thank you so much again for being here Just because before we go into our conversation demand for just introduce you know. I'll go ahead great. Thank you so growing up in South Korea and current aren't Minnesota Sayan Bay says relationship with mental health is both love and hate fear that others would think that she was quote crazy or quote ill. We're always initially present yet. She was never afraid to seek help and sought therapy with the support of her family. Ultimately changes incremental and her views towards mental health have been shaped by her time spent in the US plans to shift opinions of mental health. Not only within herself but also within her culture which drives her to constantly reflect on her Own Journey to knowing but flipping the status quo in order to de stigmatize mental health issues. So a couple of words form who are sponsor is these. He's efforts were supported by the National Center for Advancing Translational Sciences of the National Institutes of Health Award Number You L. Won t r zero zero zero two four nine four. The content is solely the responsibility of the author's isn't necessarily representative official views of the National Institutes of health. So so so in just a couple of questions here. Initially you tell me a little bit more about yourself. Yeah sure I grew up in South Korea. And it's a very competitive especially like stomach wise and I think got a lot of pressure from the society my family and myself and I think the biggest components that like Triggered me in like thinking about mental health in the first place was the dynamic pressure and the experience of me getting bullied by classmen when I was in school and like a bunch of other stuff having related to Self esteem and lacking love for myself. So I think that's like the initial reason awesome why I started to give up mental health and like I'm not healthy as in like my heart is not healthy and and I was like okay. I should get help because I don't think I can do this by myself. And then I was very lucky enough to like Have a family that I can talk to. And they're very supportive. When I brought up the concept of going going to counseling office or seeking their are free and yeah? That's when I started therapy. I was in sixth grade. I think and then I went to therapy for are two and a half years and then it became like a rotten wound that I couldn't not got got anymore so during tenth grade I went to my school counselor and I asked her like. Oh this these are the the things that I'm feeling at that time. It was kind of different. Because I wasn't experiencing bullying it was fine like a cadet wise but I was more of like. Where do I go with my life? Like what do I WANNA do. Is the school right for me because it went to a special high school foreign language high school. It's where are a lot of competitive students come to go to a very prestigious universities which is which makes the atmosphere even more competitive and Edison South Korea. Yes and it was like very I felt like I was out of place I feel like I was one of the students were like can devoting their lives to go into a great college. Because I wasn't and I didn't think like oh I'm like all right place I felt like I was in. I was taking someone else's place so like there's like someone who can do much better in this school and this environment where I'm just taking their resources into his taking their time and then I went to therapy for a couple of months. I think eight months or six six months and then like okay I I feel better now and I think my meaning in life is to like become a therapist vest myself and try to help people who go through the same thing. I went through so sorry the when did you come to arrive at that. Decision was after the show eight months of therapy that you thought AH therapist. I think it was like the first time that I went to therapist which was like in sixth grade. I was like okay like there's a person who you like helps people through their hardest times in life and I was like okay. That's really cool. Maybe I WANNA be comes therapist but then I was like okay. I Want Congress service but then I have to study a lot like what do I do. It was kind of like a vague idea in my head to become a therapist but then after I think in the process of that my second their therapy I was like okay. I'm sure that I WANNA do those like I'm so sure to this. So that's why I was like okay. I need need to become a therapist to become their pets. Need to study hard and I was like okay. Maybe this is the right school for me because will pressure me to study even harder so so I stayed there. And that's how I ended up in Minnesota and now majoring in psychology. So talking about just going back to when you were growing up you talked about the pressures but then as you were progressing in highschool those academic pressures kinda faded but then in terms for your mental health. How what challenges were present at now at that? Time I think there were a lot of a problems that I didn't address like my first therapy which was like underlying problems with like Relationships with family and how I view myself and what my values are and one of the things that I still struggle with is. How much do I value my parents? Perspectives of. How do I want to like? Meet their expectations of me. I think. Not to generalize. But that's that's like a lot of problems that I know like a lot of Asian cultured people go through because like you have to be respectful to your parents have to listen to what they're saying and I think for some reason I have like a very big pressure that I need to become like a good daughter. You're just a child that I would do whatever my parents want me to do like. I'm not a pushover. Well like I'll try my best to do that. And I learned that I didn't really have a very ideal relationship my family growing up so that was like like a very big part why I was trying to police my parents because they just want it to be accepted and love which I didn't feel as a child and I think after that my parents guide like had very long conversations about leave where we're going and that really helped with like getting to figure out what what I WANNA do in life rather than just thinking about what they want. Appreciate you sharing that because you know I guess the family dynamic in any culture you you know as always kind of so sensitive so fragile and now you're you know you're in your own words. What would you say you were at at that point when you did tell your parents you know this is how I feel but it seems the same time they were there to support you I always felt like I wouldn't be supported if I tell my family about like oh I think I am depressed or I like feel sake of my my head so I was really scared and I didn't tell them because I felt like they would take that. I'm like crazy quote ill so for the longest time I held how did but when I actually like had the courage to tell them something thing they were very supportive and I was amazed by and I think if I didn't have support of wouldn't have been the same with like along the process and everything 'cause like even though I know that it should not be like taboo to go see a counselor search. Seek help in my mind. I had that idea that counseling is for people who are like week or who were not normal normal quote which is not at all true but I just had that sick mutation in myself so if I didn't have like support from outside I wouldn't have been able to let myself think that I'm okay. Hey I seeking help and I'm okay for feelings and things that I was feeling so now now then how would you say your own cultural and racial identity infuses with the own understanding of your mental health challenges and now of course the journey they run. I'm one of the biggest things that I've learned here was people. Were very open about mental health issues. And I don't know if I was like in in a very prestigious or very fortunate group of people that I talked to but I was in a program where people were very considerate about helping other people and who liked to be like Go into medical fields in the future and I think generally just care about health and mental health is like a very big component in health general. Because I think mental as important as physical health and I was just amazed by how people are like. Yeah I have depression. And I'm I'm taking medication to help me get through it and there are so many people people who are actually dealing with their mental health not like trying to shut down and trying to have it and the cells AC- actually seeking help or talking talking about it. It was life changing for me because I know lake. It's changing rapidly in South Korea but still there are a a lot of topics that are voided when people are talking about mental health. So what came here and see just everyone talking about it freely. The and like they're happy about it. I was like okay. This is what she do and I just saw hope in like people's respectively they can change in South Korea. People are changing. I like how you said that you know your treatment on this as any other physical in this of course why we always say here at nahmias nominee as well because that is very true An you talk a little bit more Abo- The language of mental illness because you want to go into advertising as part in psychology background but so specifically now than in South Korea. How is the language of mental illness described versus? Now that you live here Minnesota Minnesota. You talked about here. It's much more open there. It's more taboo. Of course even closed off in the sense but it's it is there is a progression of understanding. But how does that differ as in like when someone says they're dealing with depression or anxiety which are like the one one of the most common illnesses that people go through people. Look at you like look at you with such sadness like they would just. I don't know it makes me feel like they're kind of feeling bad for are you but in like a looking down way so like all your. Your mental is so weak that you're actually going through something that's consider as an illness which is a for me is just kind of bizarre because I think everybody experienced a certain amount of mental illness in their life like nobody is happy. One hundred percent. Ah Time and when someone says they're experiencing a mental illness they look at you with someone like they. Just look at you in a different way so in that sense you you have the support of your parents and so then we're able to you start humanistic Castillon your own as well too. But so.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Of i've differences in what people go through in general and for me i would say it was also weird to that coming to minnesota. I remember my first few years. I felt very outcasted and i went to go seek advice. Some people advised me to join the chinese cultural club and stuff and that was weird to me because although is perfectly great advice i i never had to seek out a chinese cultural club to feel accepted back at home but then i have to here so it's just it difficult for me to adjust to this place but i've also found great things about minnesota that i can never find in california and and i'm really grateful that i came here because i feel like i've learned about whole different perspective and a whole new side of our country that i can now use in my future when i'm helping my future clients because i know i'm going to be meeting people from all different walks of life and all different areas and it truly differs the culture shock is definitely real and i only hope that people will do more to try to connect and learn about each other's cultures rather than sticking their bubble because i noticed that kind of thing to hear i noticed kind of a bubble of just being being raised and born and raised in the midwest and you kind of just wanna stay here in the midwest. Don't really want to branch out. I noticed that within a lot of my friends here and the mindset in california's quite different so i really just hope that everyone is more accepting and willing to understand other cultures cultures more and in just you said talked a little bit more about <hes> <hes> to cultural makeup of minnesota and california would say for california really the family is a network but it's not you know the the central yeah. It's that's a good way to describe. <hes> versus minnesota is so how is that factored into your support of uh of your your mental illness. I'd not gonna lie when i first came here and started noticing these differences i had a lot of jealousy and and almost slight resentment that <hes> there's such a different type of lifestyle here and i feel like i almost felt like i grew up with the lack of love compared to a lot of the families here in a lot of the typical kohl way children here were raised <hes> and when i went back home over breaks and stuff and discuss this with my friends back in california. They also definitely noticed that difference in general. It's taught me that. I need to be more proactive myself in getting the help i need. I feel like the differences it plays a huge role but <hes> at the end of the day like we are given what we're born into. You can't change anything about that and <hes> seeing the differences princes at i was pretty hard for me and <hes> i took it pretty negatively but then i realized that there are from when you were in california to where you are now minnesota what has been the most than single influential support in your own mental illness journey <hes> i have always kept in touch with my therapist back home. Even though i have a new his here in minnesota <hes> i think that would be one big source of help because he's known me okay since my hospitalization days and so having someone that's been with me for that long <hes> is really helpful full while adjusting to a new place because he's able to give me help like through perspective that is not like a newcomer like therapist purpose here having to start all over again. It's it's pretty tedious. Link just developing that therapeutic relationship it takes time and i am since i already had one back in california. <hes> we agree to stay in touch through skype and i would say that that was something that's helped me a lot through transitioning xinning between the two states to talk about to now they were your perspective has kind of remained has remained constant because of the connection with therapist or has it changed my perspective on on your own understanding of your your mental illness. <hes> definitely i think changed <hes>. I think it's changing the biggest way <hes> through my idea of i always thought mental illness like i knew it was not curable like permanently but i always thought like you know after going to therapy. It should be almost pretty much gone but i think the biggest thing that i realized within these past few years is that it is not something that will ever leave my life. It's more of something that i just have to learn to cope with <hes> and once you learn how to cope with a it's it's totally possible to live a normal daily life with these disorders so i think that was the big shift going from a mindset of like wise this still prevalent in my life to more of i understand it's going to stay in my life and that's totally okay and there are ways to deal with the so so you said now that your mind ship has shifted <hes>. We don't talk about you know the family dynamic. <hes> in your father was with the accepting however just in terms of your cultural racial identity <hes> how is that you know put into perspective again your understanding of the <hes> your own mental health <hes> and just disappoint poor structures now that you have in place yeah definitely different <hes> <hes> i would say even just <hes> <hes> after time has passed and with years doing therapy. It's kind of just become more normalized within my family. Which is why. I think it's so important horton to start somewhere like to start treatment somewhere start talking about it somewhere because as time passes it will become less awkward and less stigmatized stigmatize and i think that's definitely what happened within my family <hes> for example to in terms of medication my first year after being diagnosed i i was suggested to take medications but my parents refused until a year and a half later. They realized i was not getting any better better and they thought okay. We have to try medication. At this point. I know so many people in the asian community that struggle with mental disorders orders but are not accepted by their families or not comfortable discussing it <hes> and i think the more we talk about it within our culture and the more other families realize like oh if your daughter also has this. My son isn't like he doesn't stand out that much then <hes> <hes> or it's not as unique absurd as i thought it was because it's truly not it's such a common thing we i. I think my parents it took them a lot to learn about mental health and and i would say i think that's one way that i feel happy to have been diagnosed. A sounds pretty weird saying in yet but i'm honestly.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Totally fine in and free and then after that they required apparent signature and i remember i brought the form home and my parents refused to sign it so i couldn't receive anymore accouncing after just one session and so that's where things started to kind of go downhill. <hes> i face is a lot of family difficulties. <hes> my family was pretty broken around a two thousand thirteen two thousand fourteen <hes> my mother mother left us for about a year and a half so i lived my father and my brother for a while just us three <hes> it it was just a lot going on and <hes> a lot of abuse both physical and emotional and at the same time i was not allowed to get any sort of help <hes> and also in chinese culture there is a huge stigma on like saving face and like like making sure that there is no shame within the family. I'm sure we've all seen that within like milan or something but it's actually very real <hes> so my parents were very adamant about never ever speaking about these problems outside of our household <hes> which i know is it's pretty common in many cultural <hes> families <hes> and i did because i was in a very very bad place to the point where i wasn't allowed to cry at home because my mom saw that as a sign of weakness and just of not being a normal person which is obviously not true at all so i would often cry at school because i had nowhere else to release that pain pain and teachers started noticing and that's kind of how the whole process started of me realizing i do you need to get help and it took years to convince my parents but after years of battling through that <hes> it got ought to a really bad point where i was hospitalized and it was actually after the first time i came out of the hospital that is one my parents finally agreed to start some sort of treatment and so that's when i started <hes> psychotherapy for the first time so he said the counseling session the one in <hes> to place when you're in seventh grade and then after you know you hospitalization then you were able to receive treatment after your parents guests <hes> okay so how new year's thought what was there was about four years between <hes> because i was hospitalized the summer of my junior year of high school aw oh actually no. I'm sorry it was sophomore. Year of high school was about three years in between but since then i've been receiving therapy so since that <hes> i kind of support structure was in place after <hes> you. You said you were hospitalized. How did your parents react in the now. How were your how was your own mental health diagnoses now anyway i guess in terms of how was it being recognised. Yes and how did you feel yeah so my parents found out that i ended up in hospital from the hospital calling them. They didn't bring me. I know that's pretty common. Some parents bring their children to the hospital to keep them safe. I was found by the police after my first suicide attempt so they actually found out i was in the hospital little by coming to the hospital and seemingly there which i sure it was very difficult <hes>. They tried their best supportive. My dad tried very hard to be supportive. My mom kind of freaked out but <hes> which i know is pretty common for parents in-stat are noticing this in their children for the first time it's kind of like out of nowhere and they don't know how to deal with it. They don't know how to help their children but my dad starting from that day on he definitely changed a lot just his mentality and mindset towards towards mental health to he realized like this is something i need to take seriously now for my daughter's own wellbeing and life if anything <hes> so he was onboard pretty much after that my mom it took a a bit more time to convince but <hes> the hospitalization is truly the turning point and so actually when i first entered the hospital i was about fifteen i think sixteen and i was actually diagnosed with major depressive disorder and panic disorder so those reminder original diagnoses back then and those were definitely the disorders that i suffered with at that time i used to have panic attacks daily <hes> i had to stop school and become homeschool because i'd have panic attacks everyday in class so after i was diagnosed with that <hes> the hospital when you get released from there they also set you up with like a plan for the next steps. What are you gonna do now to keep yourself safe and so they kind of forced forced my parents to follow that plan pretty much and that's how i started getting professional help so the next few years were really tough if i i thought things would get better but if anything it definitely went the opposite route <hes> as i said mentioned before i had to leave school become home schooled i ended. I attended a outpatient program at a hospital nearby my home and every day from eight to three i went to the hospital and then at night i would come home and do school <hes> so it was very much not a typical high school school life but i think it was absolutely necessary for me to go through that treatment and go through all of that <hes> and and as the years have progressed <hes> i've gotten so much better with dealing with my panic disorder and they've lessened each year and now i only get one. Maybe once it's every three to three months compared to back then every day so definitely a lot of improvement and once i got to minnesota soda i had to find new treatment so i went into m._c._p. Minnesota center for psychology and i had intake assessment mitt and that's where they re diagnosed me because it has been a few years since i had been diagnosed and here in minnesota is where i received the diagnosis houses of borderline personality disorder p._t._s._d. Which is much more fitting to me now so i also learned that like mental disorders can shift in someone's life and your symptoms can change and honestly my depression has been a lot better i i. It's almost not even there anymore which i'm really thankful <hes> but it's definitely shifted towards different sort of issues that i've been dealing with so the treatment that you received in california now you're of course a student here in minnesota each currently going to <hes> m._c._p. Uh-huh ep can you describe had those two. How is the treatment differed at all yeah <hes>. It's definitely been different. <hes> i've struggle the law trying to transition and adopted minnesota <hes> i i think the biggest reason is because i grew up in such a diverse area coming here was very different. I also notice i mean and it's not there's no blame for anyone. It's not anyone's fault but just because i feel like there is less diversity here in minnesota. It's harder for most people to understand other cultural perspectives. I noticed that things that i wouldn't have to explain explaining california. I'd have to explain here and that became and it became hard to when people do not understand me in the way i was used to being understood and but i do notice that people are very willing to learn and i think that's why it's important and for minorities to speak up and talk about how they feel because it's not that people of caucasian people are not willing to learn. They are it's. It's it's just because for me. I never had to think about these things growing up because i was just naturally exposed. It was just a part of my everyday life. I didn't have to go out of my way to learn about other cultures. It was just around me all the time so coming here. It was extremely difficult. I definitely felt outcasted pasta often even within treatment. I'd say i tend to therapy group and i noticed that things that people talked about in group. I no longer could relate to <hes>. I feel like over here. Family is a lot more. There's a lot of importance in family here and i think i really admire that and that's something that i've always wanted in my life. So i just notice there are different types of issues that people go through between these two states in minnesota family. Structures are quite prevalent and well set. I feel like people here have pretty strong family structures. That's actually not something that i saw common in california so it was almost weird for me to come here and see my friends like being so close to their parents because in california that's actually not common a lot of times. <hes> and i think it has to do with in white families. They really value like being a tight knit family <hes> and in other cultures. It's a little bit more separate. <hes> it's more about focusing on successor yourself in a way <hes> but i just noticed.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"If i were to leave people with one last thought it would just be really just to listen to one another other and empathize with one another. It's not a competition. We're all struggling together so what's important is to just listen and and to accept and i think if you do that then the person next to you will respond that way to welcome to wellness color on the mental health and minnesota podcast produced by nami minnesota the national alliance on mental illness wellness in color is a podcast series that explores perspectives on mental health to reshape the cultural language. Each of mental illness visit now minnesota online at nami m. n. dot org subscribe to the podcast and listen on the nominee minnesota website or wherever you get your podcasts and now here's your host nami minnesota staff member caroline ludi welcome to wellness and color on today's episode. We're speaking to university of minnesota student jasmin quinn jasmine welcome. Hello nice to be here. Thank you thank you for being here. Some talk a little bit more about <hes> jasmine's background here just before we begin our conversation living with borderline personality disorder and post traumatic stress disorder twenty one year old jasmine quin battles the two worlds the rigors of student life attending college in minnesota while also navigate her cultural background. We're talk of mental. Illness remains heavily stigmatized today. She talks a wilson awesome color about the barriers she has faced both personally and culturally going up first generation chinese american working hard to knock down personal and cultural barriers she shares oh years of mental health treatment and support has given her a brighter outlook on the future of a wellness journey tug a little more about our sponsor here. These efforts was supported by the national center for advancing translational sciences of the national institutes of health award number you l. won t r zero zero two four nine four the content is solely. The responsibility of the authors is not necessarily represent the official views of the national institutes of health so jasmine just telling moore more i just about your own story here <hes> kind of starting to start with now that the mental wellness part i so now you're you're terminal twenty one years old and you're currently a college student new so you can live with b._p._d. Barn precise our in addition to push my stress disorder but what how how were you able to support your own illnesses in terms of your own own healthy wallis well starting from junior year of high school. Actually i've been receiving treatment for my mental health and i've continued that up until this day <hes> and i think that is one of my main ways of staying on track and in coping with these because i've learned to live with it except instead of like trying to push out of my life but <hes> i go to d._b._t. Which is dialectical behavioral therapy. That definitely helps with my borderline a ton <hes>. It's a pretty intensive therapy program but i highly recommend it to anyone who's going through b._p. Sorry <hes> and and <hes> it's twice a week. <hes> there's a group aspect and individual therapy aspect and i think it's a perfect mix of enough therapy for for you to learn and at the same time practice your skills and so now that you're kind of on this pathway to own support <hes> you just talk a little bit more about know your background as first generation chinese american as well to living with a mental illness yeah definitely so my parents are both immigrants from china. They both became american citizens fears after they arrived here <hes> and then they had my brother and i in california so i grew up there a pretty diverse city. I grew up in san jose. <hes> it's a huge city as well. I think the the populations over a million now which is insane but my parents up until about three or four years ago we're definitely clean not accepting or understanding of anything that deals with mental health in chinese culture just does not exist in china. It just does not exist in general there is no treatment centers. Mental health is honestly thought of as like a taboo or joke just <hes> they just don't find it a series thing and not legit to them either so growing up. My parents had that mindset concert and i actually started having difficulty starting in seventh grade. I believe middle school. <hes> and i remember going to counseling thing for the first time just in school just the school counseling services and <hes>.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"More radio to buy special radio is not like now, now there's a million internet radio. So they can do that now. And then we also launch a case consultation to train, the provider, if we're gonna go and do these outreach through the radio of the moment, people come. We want the provider to be ready. So I along another Kelly had a case consultation for professional, and then we went around to different providers to talk to them to do more training to get them ready to do outreach, and it was very successful because we believe that if people have enough information to solve reflect, then they can have gauge about where they are. So what we did we invite a lot of guests to come talk about what is depression. When do you go get help, what is family therapy? What is couple therapy? What is suicide? What about parenting? What about civil commitment? What does that mean before we talk in Mong, and I think it was very successful. I did that for a little bit. I will. I did not host that I helped to manage and supervise two people who did that. And then maybe in turn two thousand ten I won't work. What another agency we got a grant, and I ask for part portion of the grant to continue radio Shola there. So we continue to the Deccan education. And you know in twenty sixteen thousand seventeen I heard from people as far as North Carolina, sending because right now, if they go to internet and the radio station archive, their programs online, so people can release into this. We should have this program long time ago because those small community us who live in North Carolina who live in very small. Camila on Alaska, Wisconsin. We don't have access to these things. And so one of the. Thing that, I believe that's important is to continue to provide education to the community so they can sell reflect. So they had the knowledge to understand about what they're going through because people go who are not Trink have lower symptoms. They cannot piece it together. And when we talk about this allowed them to kinda piece them together, and they can listen to that, and not feel shameful alone. -able in the home and the sector that we don't have access to are the people who are in the factory, the each have a radio and listen to all day on my African get information to them. So they can listen without feeling they're being identifiable single out than they did. They feel safe to to get help. That's one part. So I think we need to continue to make sure they we have affordable service for people. Those who we see people there to type of people come the people who come the ally, help those have publicises insurance. How have you seen your clients practice mental wellbeing after sinking seeking mental health like what has been so most successful? Well, I think there are some that you can see those who are very, very depressed actively exhibiting trauma symptom. You tell them they tell you, they say before when the storm come and hit, I see branch and I hear brench knock on my window. I see the flood in the Cam, and I go in high in the blanket over me. Now, I'm not so scared because you told me America we have code this building head cold in Seoul. We're not gonna fall. So I'm able to. Wisden that. And when my heart says to power, I remember your face I do breathing. So is is still scared, but it doesn't stay the whole day now. So there tell you the increased their function. So you look at this is one of the hardest question for me as their abyss of, how do you measure your calm? Do we do what the medical model where we reduce symptom is a symptom reduction, or about those that successfully are able to understand how the mind the body were able to south manage from those symptom, but they're not functioning, well as you look at ace score? They're not really functioning, well, they still do nothing Audie law in very impulsive. Dude, things will we know people who are very highly traumatize is very hard for them to be. Focused be able to do things very impulsive. And so there live may not be the mind Nabi a scare before they mainly know how to manage the body a little bit more, but they're still not very functional. They're not able to go to work. They're not able to live a meaningful life. So you have to do allow different. They're certain thing when you talk about growth is little bit harder than we talked about a three month for a month where you intensity focused on teaching them. The skill to managing is so they don't feel it. They're gonna die. So I often say to then the goal is not, you'll never be scared. The goes at went scare come, you know what to do. It doesn't stay home day. You know, so people do tell you and you do see the changes those that you see for years, and you don't see that changes. Then you, you I really question. What's the motive for coming to their apy? So, so we do see some very dramatic chain. We do see that people able to go back to work. Live a more meaningful life, and they're able to some people are so scared of, of even using the oven because they've been explosion, but they were to help their children cook and do things. So that's a functional improvement. Yeah. So some are very tangible some they can tell you what's happening. And so they can they're able to demonstrate back to you. So what is your personal definition of mental wellbeing? Why did for me it is that they have a meaningful life. The understand themself, we all have limitation is for them to feel it. They have gained some way of changing and feel that they can function. You know, I can never be like you, you can be like me. So the standard is not for me to be you but standards for me to be able to do things that I feel I'm doing to the best. My ability, so mentioned a mental wellbeing is. A very complex, very personal definition. You as a professional working and hearing all these challenges from people like how do you maintain your mental wellbeing? Very hard. People say that they lead at office, but I'm not sure how they do it. So. You know, I work very hard. I on Friday, every tried to, I don't home till ten thirty because this, my most crazy day, so I tried to play sport. I try to do things to help me, I try to Mr. music, I tried to do a lot of time. But, you know, it's also hard to not be compassionate because they days are. You don't know them just the story you begin to understand their children, who they are. And so it is very hard to forget this story. So I think people might do differently for me. Sometime, you know is p we have all kinds of go to train and people tell us all kinds of way to help ourselves. But for me, I try to Mel go home and play music, solo that may be my other part of the family may not be head, good mental Welby I go and golf. I go do something for me. But, you know, we each carry something inside, even though we don't share because these are very sacred story people trust you. They don't they tell people tell you. They don't tell why the husband and they tell you that no one indefinitely has ever know. And so you came, you're just like you tell the client your brains recording. All of these things, you have all these memory too. So it's very hard. How often do therapists psychologists or social workers also seek help. I know that a lot of people do, do seek help because remember, we are not just there were human before, we're there, abyss, or we are not perfect, we have our own issue. So I do think that people, you wouldn't be surprised to see a good number of the helping professional also getting hope so. Yeah, thank you very much last question, the either any final words that you'd like to add to the conversation that mental health and the future of. Why will say cross culture mental health? Whether you tumble Mon, tub any ethnicity, cross culture, man house is hard is hard is tedious because we had to make sure that the process meaningful to Klein, we are very well trained a we think we are. But if the training are not translating to something that's meaningful for them. Then we have many factors to, to face. We have yet to sessions, you had to get a diagnosis so that you can get paid yet at three sessions of the, you can get treatment plan developed. So they if they come audit the they think you have focus on. Then you have a person sitting in front of you a lots of pain, and they tell you lot of story, a lot of facts, but yet the peace to say what does this mean was what happened to you was to impact was the functional impairment right now? And what do I do in a way that is not a talking cure, but is a meaningful process? Real is nice. It's also real sometime. We do therapy are so nice, but it's not real. It's not helping at all. It's just so nice, but it's not factor. So you had to wear many hats and to make it harder you challenge people, but sometimes do challenge with us really nice. When you take people to exposure trauma, and the before you have five minutes before they gotta go and you feel they're really active you on them to go home. That way that you extend the time, and that means you extended transportation waiting for that client, they're interpreter. You push. So we have so many things to do, but cross, cultural mental health houses, very hard. They are very tedious. I think you had to be clinically well-trained you had to be culturally well worth, and you had to be humble yet to be humility to say that I don't know what they say. Most mike. Career, I were allowed with the mown patient. But in the last five six years, I've been working with the new refugees curreny the Koran and I saw one recently saw a women from Iran. And so is I'm trying to be humble. Because my has moment is ahead of me all the time, and I have to often remember to say, what is this me in your culture? What, what does this mean? And so the eye to say, you know, don't forget, your thinking among person and so is is hard in. So I think we have to be humble and had humility to say that we don't know much and join that process were client allow them to also educate us, too. So, but I wanna thank you for inviting me for this afternoon. Thank you so much for sharing. True. Amy am I thank you so much for additional resources related to this episode. Please check the podcast show notes and visit NAMI. Minnesota online at NAMI dot org. You've been listening to wellness and color on the mental health in Minnesota podcast. Produced by NAMI Minnesota..
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"And so I think the clinical say allow me to understand the science and the skill and the ratio of risky of cultural allow me to see some perspective that sometime people over pathology low people minimize it. Yeah. So in many communities. I think especially Asian, there is that disconnect where the older generations may not know the correct terms or understand a mental health, and the way that we do in today and modern days, and I think that a lot of a lot of that has to do with historical trauma. So how do you think that historical trauma impacts your client's mental health? You know, I don't I don't think I see historical trauma, in that perspective, though. I think for me universally in the last three year as I b become more more involved. I think universally symptoms symptoms of very universal. I have worked with Haitian. I were were Dominican Rican moans Molly Cambodia Karan Karenni. I think universally symptoms are the same no matter where you are from. If you're depressed, you have all the symptoms that everybody have if you had post traumatic stress people have the same thing, what is different culturally. Is that the manifestation of the disorder is defined very culturally. Instead in, in now, we call schizophrenia schizophrenia in the old day. We don't have schizophrenia. We call it. Oh, you're possess, for Mali, more Dunga car. Right. So something came so you possess. And so the defining of the disorder is has very cultural base, but symptom wise, I think is universal. So I think we have to be careful how we use these term about historical trauma, or trauma, is that I think people. Three instance, saying intimacy and how they define and how. Then they receive support from the families of very different. If you look at mental health compared to physical health mental health is severely severely impair person's function. But people if you have a broken late of your cancer, people do things for you. And when you're depressed that you are severely impair, people may not have the same sense of empathy because we're not visible outside. And so, I don't think is because of historic of trauma, but is because of language precision. For example, when mom moved to America, there are a lot of will Campbell there that we don't have where we're not a scientific coach will we have signs will live in the mountain. So when we look at computer, we don't have the soft part of computer, the brain, the heart where we don't have those because language precision, is you develop language based on what you need on. And so there are certain words certain term that we do not have, and so that, I think it takes time for those of us who, who educate them, we need to be able to. Takes very complex concept and be able to make it in a way that people can understand. So when I do training and supervision with my students in my staff, one of the challenge, I always have is you learn very complex, very sophisticated world, too. So that when you around your collie, look, so sophisticated, but the question is, can you explain that in such a way that your client can engage in understand, for example, the word trauma? We talked so much about trauma, and trauma is often overused, but a lot of clinician can I explain trauma in a very simple term their client. And so you have to find ways to explain so how do you explain trauma to the Koran of the monk, who discount from the mountain? When we Bill hells, we Bill alarm system. And when the alarm goes off, it tells us to be careful because something's not normal when God Bill human or the creative Bill human, we have fear and fear is arm system. And when you're fearful your by goes off, and your heart stop pounding. Get bloods, to get ready to go, and then you've are frayed because you don't have the medical training. And you think something is completely wrong with your body, you're gonna die defeats into that. So if we can take very complicated and very complex concept and make it where the client can take parts and find meaning in that process, then they will stay I find that a lot of these young clinician who are brilliant in school. Can I explain this concept in ways that make sense to their client? And so they say the client or not. A very resistant and don't take part, but really is the issue is really is clinician. And so it is important for us to make sure that what we do what we say we do know what we're talking about. Otherwise, is oppressive get paid. But they don't get anything out of that process. And so it's important to, to be clinically trained and to know what we say. What language words or phrases to your clients, use to describe their mental health condition and wellness for the Mon? I live in the east coast for a very long time before I moved to Minnesota in nineteen ninety five so I have to learn how to do diagnostic assessment because mental status assessment as, as you know, have many, Merrick many complicated word and from language precision standpoint. We don't have those if you look at Maung Maung, use the livered Lucian, which is delivered. Right. As a Senator to descri-. Sion's and personality traits are action. Right. So for more when you say share law, if the worst share is used before an adjective, then it described a personality or action. If you say someone is share Couve, right? I mean that prisons, very temperamental very quick. Right. But if you say newer share if you use an adjective preceding the were share that describe emotions. And, and so the is important to understand 'cause mongers very limited because if you that's why psychological testing or psychometric testing is very difficult because when we do questionnaire to design the psychometric testing, we use multiple angles to measure validity validity and reliability. So they may as you about depression anxiety from different angle using different word. In a very subtle way to the if both can come back to the same. But for moment, because we don't have those subtle changes language, the subtlety of how rely remeasure reliability and validity are can get easily be miss because for Monja sheer means a lot of things. Right. And saw sheer means a lot in right Lucian means a lot in Lucian means rotten liver. Right means you're chaotic on your kind of feeling out of control new sheer means you're depressed. Your worry on socio me. You can't all over. So this is important for Mon. All people who were more if you use the Mon language is to understand. The complexity of these were in what, what kind of connotation did do carry on. So when Montcalm to see me, they don't know me talk so much about psychological term that tend to tell more physiological. They come because they wait until the fiscal functioning are so impair they cannot work of they go to school. The teachers say this person, I'm referring to you, because he or she seems like they're not here and only then when mum calm and then when mold come and say, I went to see my doctor my blood voice of cave, physiologically, I'm okay. But I still don't feel well, I don't feel sick, you know, and so you do your assessment, you find out lots of family problem. Lots of financial problem, lots of parenting difficulty. Lots of different issue in the. A UC. Do you think this caused at the no I don't I don't think about that is because they're not connecting the spiritually thinking, but wellness and physiologically, but they're not psychological mindedness, is something that we didn't continue to psycho education. And so when I were with the mown MONCAYO newly-arrived refugee, whether I talk about depression anxiety. Oh trauma. I have a lot of picture in loud illustration and takes time for me for a long time to do that. And I will say to them when you go see the doctor the doubt to give you pill when you have stomach ache. You take the pill. Right. Yes. So we talk about what's happening when you triggered by something remind you of a very bad experience. Do you take my pill the pill? I get you is to understand that. Yes. The brains recording all this memory. And when something we might trigger that you're there, and then you bring all your by to activate. And so that's when you should remember my pill. My pills. Remember my face the members, they know America, and I should breathe, because I'm not gonna die. It's not real just thinking, even is a memory three painful on safe. And yet the distinct being safe from painful for them. And they say so if you're scared this past week since you saw me, how many times do you remember my face, and there was, I remember your face almost every day, that I know that it's transitioning from therapy to home, something happening. I asked this, I have no clue what we talked about last week that I know that there was a whole process for me. I go back and look at my no. And this, we did she, she oh, he doesn't remember anything, then I had to say, okay, what do I do differently? And so even very basic step light does it takes a lot of time. And so because I know that if they cannot get something concrete to help them in a matter of time, the not gonna come back to see me. And so I, I had to really make sure there it is meaningful for them. It is not something that I get paid every time but they come back in for weeks. They don't have anything then they don't wanna come back. So when your clients. They come seeking help from you. Are they like aware that they're struggling mentally, and that's why they're seeking for your help or because you talked a lot about they talk aloud about their physiology? What when do when they do arrive at my place, normally, they have seen their medical doctor, they have seen their bliss. They have seen their Sharman. They're seeing the Reverend if they go to church, the have exhaust allow the traditional remedies before they normally get to me, and so they, you can look at, you know, one thing that we do for longtime when someone's extremely depressed it come to you off the it doesn't take the DSM five to see that they're depress. You can see right away. They're very depress. When someone's very scared and you talk to Lao, do something I had a high, I started seeing as I was telling her about trauma, and I keep say this, and I bang table. And she say can you stop that? And she starts to cry, then, you know, they have PTSD the simple fact, they, we s a lot of question that they may not think of the question we asked three confirming what they're experiencing. Inside. That is one. The reason they combined with. They know the we know something more a give validation that we're professionally trained we know something that people haven't asked him. They, we ask them to say when you have nightmare what happened. Depress what happened was happening. You're thinking, whatever you emotion was happening to your body. And I think validates to them that all this person know something 'cause they have me and they will tell you, you asked me something that people never asked me. No, and so they, they know no. When they get your say. So when I do were when my American clients you start out with the question. What bring you to see me, right? For my mom Klein. It takes many session for them to answer the question why come see you UCLA? Why are you coming to see me? They'll say, oh, I'm not well what does that mean? So it takes a long time, maybe three or four searching for them to say that's why come see you because then you we do. A Cessna when we present an in this is what I know about. You is this true. And they're saying does come to see you. They need you to help frame that for them where American climate comes they, what bring you to see me. There's a War, I come to see because they're familiar with the process. So this is the process when I work with it takes time for me to redefine home them shape that question, and I think you briefly touched on this, but how do you think that mental health services can be improved for people in color in particular, the monk community? I think it needs a lot of work. I think we need a lot of education. And this is why NAMI is wonderful. I've been partner with non me to do the mental first aid. I am a big user of nominees pan flip because I think that we need constant education as I was talking earlier. In the late nineties, and to early two thousand there were series of murder suicide in the community by couples and we were. Shock. We're not sure what to do. So they were group of us got together. We believe that we need more education because when you do workshop, and townhall meeting, the people who come are the people who are ready, have some inflammation. It is the one who never comes. So, you know back then is only maybe about sixteen seventeen years ago. But the technology back then now is completely different. So at the time, there's only one more radio station. So we proposed to do three things we went to the state and guts, a grant from the health and spirit, the in grant, and we launch a magazine and has some. Materials about depression, and suicidal because young people don't necessarily listen to the radio and at that time you had to listen.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Now. <Speech_Male> Meaning, <Speech_Male> <Advertisement> if <Speech_Male> you wanna tell <Advertisement> me <Speech_Male> I was Born <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> October <Advertisement> fifth, <Speech_Male> nineteen <Advertisement> sixty-nine <Speech_Male> <Advertisement> <Silence> in <Advertisement> Devonshire, Bermuda <Speech_Male> <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> on a hurricane <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> night, <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> that I <Speech_Male> would <Speech_Male> have bipolar <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> that I would <Speech_Male> survive suicide <Speech_Male> twice <Speech_Male> that I <Speech_Male> would be divorced <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> that I would <Speech_Male> go through <Speech_Male> bankruptcy <Speech_Male> IRS <Advertisement> day. <Speech_Male> <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> If <Advertisement> you told me <Speech_Male> I will go through all <Speech_Male> of those things, including <Speech_Male> a <Speech_Male> second <Speech_Male> suicide suicide <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> survival, <Speech_Male> I <Speech_Male> would tell you, <Speech_Male> I wanna live. <Speech_Male> I want <Advertisement> all of it. <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> No regrets. <Speech_Male> I see <Speech_Male> myself as <Speech_Male> an advocate <Speech_Male> speaking <Speech_Male> things <Advertisement> that I <Speech_Male> know, <Speech_Male> I also know <Speech_Male> that a lot of people <Speech_Male> like me <Speech_Male> don't have <Speech_Male> the platform <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> to speak about <Speech_Male> these issues. <Speech_Male> And I <Speech_Male> also know that <Speech_Male> an also want <Speech_Male> people to understand <Speech_Male> that even <Speech_Male> though you know, him in a <Speech_Male> stir a Baptist <Speech_Male> minister and <Speech_Male> get out there and preach <Speech_Male> it up and have <Speech_Male> people <Speech_Male> falling <Speech_Male> out. <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> That, that <Speech_Male> does not <Speech_Male> <Speech_Male> protect you <Speech_Male> from <Speech_Male> life <Speech_Male> life still coming <Speech_Male> life. 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People have been on this <Speech_Male> earth <Speech_Male> having babies. <Speech_Male> So now <Speech_Male> we get getting this little period <Speech_Male> between say seventeen <Speech_Male> hundred now. <Speech_Male> We <Speech_Male> think that modern science <Speech_Male> has the answer <Speech_Male> all of that me <Speech_Male> think not. <Speech_Male> But it's dominating <Speech_Male> though, and <Speech_Male> I think it's on <Speech_Male> us as people <Speech_Male> of color <Advertisement> to say, <Speech_Male> hold on the second <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> I come from <Advertisement> a culture <Speech_Male> where <Advertisement> so <Speech_Music_Male> that <Advertisement> there can be <Speech_Music_Male> other voices <Advertisement> <Speech_Music_Male> <Advertisement> <Speech_Music_Male> instead of just <Advertisement> lettuce <Speech_Music_Male> we can have some <Advertisement> other things <Speech_Music_Male> in the salad. <Speech_Music_Male> <Speech_Music_Male> And <Speech_Music_Male> that's <Speech_Music_Male> our reason for being <Speech_Music_Male> <Speech_Music_Male> pastor, <SpeakerChange> Sean, <Speech_Music_Female> you favor <Advertisement> show. <Speech_Music_Female> Thank you <Advertisement> for talking <Speech_Music_Female> about your celebration, <Advertisement> <Speech_Music_Female> <Advertisement> but also <Speech_Music_Female> your own voice, <SpeakerChange> <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> and thank you for being <Speech_Music_Male> here to <Speech_Male> listen <Speech_Male> <Advertisement> to my voice <Speech_Music_Male> <Advertisement> into what I have <Speech_Music_Male> to say, I <Advertisement> appreciate <Speech_Male> it. <Advertisement> <Speech_Male> For <Advertisement> additional <Speech_Male> resources <Advertisement> related <Speech_Male> to this <Advertisement> episode. 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"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"Frank. You caroline. And while to our guest host Scindia Fasha. Hello, a native Bermuda. But formed in shape, number betas, a former newspaper reporter, writer, EMT, Curtly deigned, Baptist, minister and hospice chaplain, forty nine year old pastor John Anthony Burchill, toxin, Molson, color about his understanding of hope and their connection to his own mental health after surviving two suicide attempts. These efforts were supported by the National Center for advancing translational sciences of the national institutes of health award number, you L one t r zero zero two four nine four. The content is solely the responsibility of the authors. This not necessarily represent the official views of the national institutes of health. So welcome pastor Anthony Burchill. Thank you. Yeah. So just kind of get this started. Can you just tell us a little bit more about yourself? I was born in Bermuda to, to lovely parents, Anita and Bill, I have two older sister and a younger brother, I was educated in Bermuda, and Barbados, and Canada and England as well as here in the United States, I would say that my shaping took place in bar betas at my grandmother's in the it is the reason why I am the minister that I am it is the reason why I pray as I do it is the reason why I see myself as I see myself as a pastor in the world. And so you said that your grandmother was a huge influence on your life. What do you mean little more about that? My grandmother was a steadfast and solid Christian. My grandmother awoke. Every day at four AM and I was then about seven and at first, I couldn't understand what she was doing. But then I would hear her sing sweet, our sweet our prayer, and then she would go into praying, and my grandmother, had eight children and each of those eight children, had at least six children. So my grandmother would start at my uncle Sonny. Her eldest pray for him pray for his wife pray for each of his children by name. And she wouldn't just be saying blessed though in so blessed. So and so she was saying specific things about each. One of them. My mother was number seven, so she down all the boys and then my mother Anita, she pray for my mother, then she pray for my father, Bill. She pray for my sister Paula. And then I would park up to hear what my grandma. Mother was telling God about me and as a seven year old. I didn't really understand that. But all I do know is that I felt really special that my grandmother could talk so easily to the creator of the universe who was listening to her. And in the center of that conversation was me. Never let that go. I have understood myself that way. And I think that I tried to embody that in everything that I do. So then in, you know, your relationship now with your grandmother, now, your current role as a dean Baptist minister, also hospice chaplain, how has this, you know, correlation manage your own mental health. Well, if you can imagine. Feeling so centered. And so ground, and so wrapped in pillows, and so loved. And then find yourself. On love. On able to manage your life. The things that grounded you, my sense of being intelligent. Being smart. Being very good in school. And they arrived that journalism school to discover that there were people who were much smarter than I was. To then, discover that there was such a thing as a writer's block. And I'm in journalism school. My values. My grounding my sense of security did not marry up with this new reality. How did your life and how did your own philosophies of your mental health come into place while to? Well, I. I took a turn. I do get through journalism school. I did find my voice to ride and do everything. And I did really well in the end and that was fine. I went back to where Muda job was working journalists. Everything was fine. EMT everything was fine working as a speech writer for the premiere everything was fine. But I basically turned my back on my religious life after that incident on the bridge. I felt that if I was that important to God, God would have done something to. To prevent me from harming myself. If I was the apple of God's I as my grandmother said, and if I was that important to be spoken about to God by her, then why is it that this precious child was not helped in the moment of greatest need? Why was this precious child abandoned? So I had a very difficult time between what my mother sorry, my grandmother taught me about faith, and what my actual lived experience a faith was in depression. So I basically walked away from my faith. I became rigorously humanistic and atheist stick, and my life in a long along that front. And then my life crashed. I worked hard put in the hours, I took care of the children. I did everything everything, and then the divorce came and the reason for the divorce was I wasn't in the house enough. I wasn't present enough. And for me, it was strange because I said, well, this house, the swimming pool didn't just happen. You know, I took care of my children, did everything Reddin this stories, everything. But I worked basically night and day EMT at night, speech writer or journalist and speechwriter by day in order to pay the move and the end of the day. When I stood before the judge who took three minutes to take away house and everything from me. Because my wife, then wife cleaning me out became homeless. I was just a. Person pay child support that was, but I not live. I discovered. That all of that work and living, what we would say they were dream that conventional understanding life failed me as well. So here I was. What I felt or understood God to be through my grandmother's eyes had failed. I came to this part work. Tar house who to kids great job, all of that community minded community spirit through my fraternity. Still end up in court. And the judge only took three minutes to take away what it taken me years to build up. How do you think I felt at that point? So I was in a situation where just. For there was nowhere else to turn. I don't think anything else was possible. I didn't think I had any options. I thought that everything was done for me. And that, that time I was okay as long as I was. I got to see my children. I got to read them, there at times stories and every day would say gonna work. Me fine because I'm gonna go see my daughters and Redon bedtime stars as long as that that happened than I was I was fine. So for me, I then started to rethink my understanding of God, but now as a thirty year old divorced, man. With kids who've been through the ringer that fathers go through trying to see their kids in a divorce situation. And then I got to a stage where I started to reexamine my relationship with God through the prism of all of that for my university, challenges, right through my divorce through situations. My children. And I came to the realization that my grandmother wasn't wrong. I came to the realization that as a child, and it couldn't have been any other way, I dependent I depended on her as the carrier of my faith. I didn't I didn't have the I'd have to do that. My grandmother, did it for me. And so what I then learned is that. The God, I was coming to understand wasn't the God of the Moses story intervened. But was the God that says, no matter what happens, you our beloved. And if you understand yourself to be beloved John, Anthony. How are you going to relate to your ex wife? If you understand yourself to be beloved. How are you going to relate to your children? What can make you? For out of love with your children. Nothing. There's nothing that could happen. Can make you fall out of love with me. And that was my journey. Back to I gave it my jobs. I quit. States Howard to figure out for myself. On an intellectual level that science method in my head. What my understanding my self could be now. The mental illness, hit a second time when I. Separated from my hospice hub, I was victim homeless. Bankruptcy. Hos housing insecurity. Unemployment, all at once all came crashing down together, and it was just too much. It was just too much for me. Interact at this point in time now, you said, now you're at Howard after Howard, what point how old are you now in this went to Howard, I was thirty three. So now you've just in early thirties, thirties, early thirties now, graduated from Howard, I went into Chaplaincy at Washington hospital center, and George to I then went into hospice, Chaplaincy after that, loved it separated from that job after four years. And then because I wasn't working vixen Vic Shen came bills bills came, I r s with IRS it on, on those built up and built up and built up. And so I in that for tax rent to the medical profession, the mental health professionals who then mis-diagnosed me as a consequence of their misdiagnosis. I went into full-fledged mania. I mean full-fledged I was I got caught speeding at seventy two miles per hour. By a cop. Didn't even know that was, you know. I was just beyond myself. I thought I was Jesus. I thought I was invincible nothing could harm me. And how long in between your wrongful dominant? Diagnosis in the now, you're correct diagnosis of living with bipolar. The wrong diagnosis was at the towards the end of twenty fourteen. And then I had the. Manic episode was treated for that. I came back home. My head might selections of drugs. But I didn't like how I felt. Mania I felt everything every poor. And my body was feeling. These drugs made me numb. I was hollow. I couldn't feel my feelings. I was in situations where I should have been upset, but I had to intellectualize it because I wasn't feeling in my body. And then I came to may of twenty fifteen and may fourteen one twenty fifteen would have been. Venti years. My father suicide. And so now after that point where you are right now, as you say, of course within your own family lost both your father in your usage. Grandfather suicide and you sister, brother. And now, of course, yourself made suicide temps in, in your own were just say that for my tribe, suicide is the family business. But then. How has this now come back into where you are right now because you are a hospice chaplain of urine? You have the throws of life. So how you weeks, the stage of your your? Your mental health. What you do is you live day by day, and you celebrate that today I don't feel like killing myself, so I one is your language than celebration, some recovery, not recovery. Why? Because I know that tomorrow could be different and I respect that. And the more that I respect that the more, I would be able to take care out of for myself, then if I thought a moving in an exotic inexorable line towards some destination, cold wellness. I don't think so. So then in your will as a Baptist minister, also has speech hatlin, how does your racial and cultural identity fuse with this, meaning of the word celebration, because you said before that we don't use the word privilege or recovery, because it's not of the character..
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"To help you get better. Thank you for that Kim, you just speak briefly about the design of the device shore. Yeah, we saw the bracelet. If you look on our website, it looks very much just like a an activity tracker. And we we did design this purposefully because you know, I hit it for twenty years. We want to make sure that it's on your terms when you share about your behavior. So we designed it to be discreet and to blend in, but the beauty is that we're seeing more and more people, you know, just as we're talking about mental health today. More and more people talking about mental health more and more people talking about specifically hair pulling disorder skin picking nail biting, and you know, sometimes just leveraging the bracelet as a way to to say to a friend. Oh, you know, it's it's because I have this disorder, and it's helping me take control of it. And just it's been really exciting. When people come back to us and say, oh, I told a friend. They thought it was cool. You know, like the reaction like we're so afraid of what other people think sometimes? And and that's why we hold it back. And that's why we hide it. But sometimes I think we have to recognize it. Everyone's afraid of what of everyone else is thinking about them, like even when I'm sitting in a meeting, and I'm pulling my hair, and I'm thinking, oh are they looking at me. Are they seeing me? The reality is they're also sitting there thinking is my hair. Okay. Is my you know, my notes, right like whatever like everyone's so in their own minds. So hopefully, this helps you build awareness of where your hands are. So you can take control you can hopefully then have enough confidence in yourself to start sharing your own story and releasing the baggage because like I said that baggage just feeds itself and that's our goal. Our goal is really to help people learn to love themselves. Caroline noticed that I end all of my emails with love strength awareness. Love yourself. Be shrug enough to go after what you want and to be aware enough of what's happening around you. So that you can make the right choices. Thank you so much fearing an I agree with that too. Is so important that you know, we he said before big h other up by as while we recognize that everybody is dealing with. No, their own internal strife, so it's appreciated. Yeah. Shared your story. Thank you for additional resources related to this episode. Please check the podcast show notes and visit NAMI Minnesota online at NAMI dot org. You've been listening to wellness in color on the mental health in Minnesota podcast produced by NAMI, Minnesota.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"There's a lot of work to be done in this country. I think each one of us individually if we focus a little bit more on our own minds and how we can be good to one another. So that the person next to us their mind is not getting aggravated just because of what we're saying. And doing I feel like that's a good start. Welcome to wellness in color on the mental health in Minnesota podcast produced by NAMI, Minnesota the National Alliance on mental illness while listen color is a podcast series that explores perspectives on mental health to reshape the cultural language of mental illness. Visit now Minnesota online at NAMI, m dot org. Subscribe to the podcast and listen on the nominee, Minnesota website or wherever you get your podcasts. Your host for this episode is NAMI Minnesota staff member Caroline Ludi. Your co host is Morita steal a member of the nominee. Minnesota multicultural young adult advisory board. And now, here's Caroline. Boyden reads, a New York to parents from India and Neela Kumar thirty seven shares her story going up with anxiety obsessive compulsive disorder and trickle Tila mania impulse control disorder in which individuals have the compulsive urge to Paul their own hair. Currently a mental health advocate and Neela talks to wellness and color about her struggles with identity race and religion and Howard path recovery began with the words shy weird and wrong, but continue with love in awareness. Welcome neela. Thank you for having me. These efforts were supported by the National Center for advancing translational sciences of the national institutes of health award number. You L one t r zero zero two four nine four the content is solely the responsibility of the authors did not necessarily represent the official views of the national institutes of health for more, mental illness and color. Follow us on mental health and Minnesota podcast on the NAMI, Minnesota website at NAMI, M, N dot ORG. Gee analogous introduce our guest host Maurizio steel. Hi, thank you for having me today. Caroline, welcome Neela. I wanted to just start out by asking you pretty broadly. What does healthy mean to you? I'm delighted to be here today to share my mental health story. I believe for myself healthy has been a definition in the making. I'm thirty seven years old as Caroline mentioned. But it's only within the last few years that I've really recognized how much the mind in body are connected. And how when one is sick. The other is sick and vice versa. And so I'm really trying to understand what is healthy for me. And what are the right steps for me to be healthy? But for me healthy is about being in balance with that mind that body and also the spirit and making sure that my soul is fueled. As well. Thank you for sharing that you said that you just recently started to learn about how the mind and the body are in the spirit from your definition are connected in what it means to be healthy. Can you elaborate a little bit further? How did you kind of get to this current working definition? Yeah. I mean, I think it really just goes back to I guess, I've always been very spiritual person. And so just recognizing in growing up with some of these mental health conditions, which I didn't have the language for what they wore. When I was a child, it was Oshii shy. Not she's anxious. Right. Oh, she's quiet. Not you know, I it just it wasn't the right people didn't see me for the mental health condition that I had they saw me a shy. They saw me as weak. They saw me as a frayed not. As someone living with an issue in my mind, where I'm yeah, I'm afraid I'm afraid of what's going to happen because of that anxiety. That's there not because I can't speak, but I feel like in as of up I've found a how. Basically, how the mind kind of feeds the health of your body. So that disconnect that I had of I feel anxious or I have these OCD intrusive thoughts that are wreaking havoc on my mind. Also played a role in the health of my body. Like, I remember in college during finals, I would always get sick because it was really really stressed and anxious about the grades and and the work that I was doing this was in Miami. Where it's it's warm. It's sunny like there's no reason to get a cold or one time, I got a really bad neck pain, like it, manifests, the the stress and the enzyme would manifest within my body. And so trying to reconcile that trying to exercise more. So that my my muscles are strong enough. But also try to exercise my mind so that I can handle the anxiety. When I when I see it trying to become more aware of oh, I'm having an anxious moment or oh, I'm having an intrusive thought right now. And rather than feeding it trying to subdue it. So that it doesn't take that hold and it doesn't feed that negative energy in my body, which then translates to me getting physically sick. Hopefully that makes sense. Yeah. It really does. And so alongside your process of redefining and reshaping. What healthy means for yourself has your use of resources or people we turn to changed or developed a over the course of your mental wellness journey. Oh, absolutely. I think for for. So I also have hair pulling disorder, which is as Caroline mentioned a sub-conscious coping mechanism for stress and anxiety. Whereby I would just pull it my hair because it it provided fleeting moments of relief. But for twenty years, I didn't know what it was. So for twenty years I started pulling in my early teens. And I thought I was really weird and really wrong for doing this behavior. And I didn't know that it was a mental health condition. So for those twenty years, I was in the dark, and sort of feeding this cycle of negative self speak around who I was and because of this thing I was doing to myself. And then in my twenties, I went to Dr Google, and I googled, y am I pulling out my hair? And that's when I found out that I wasn't alone and that it was a mental health condition. And it's really only in understanding what the behavior is that you can actually start taking action to take control of it. And from Dr Google where did you turn to next? Yes. So Dr Google guided me, too, it's now called the TLC foundation for body focused repetitive behaviors. So that's the umbrella mental health term for hair, pulling it also includes skin picking and nail. And so Google me to their website, which is B F R B dot org. And that's where I read stories about other people at read about the condition. A couple of years later even used their website to find a mental health treatment professional who is well-versed in these disorders to to meet with so the internet's great resource, and then in moving here to Minnesota started getting involved on the in learning more about what Namiki does, but there's tons of resources out there. It's just about having the right Google search. There's also lots of. Facebook communities where people share a lot of ideas of how to take control of certain things. I joined also for a really long time. I've had intrusive thoughts about.
"minnesota." Discussed on Mental Health In Minnesota
"I would say that talking about mental health reinforces in my mind. At least that I have to take care of myself and that it's important to take care of ourselves. And we can't take care of ourselves. Welcome to wellness and color on the mental health and Minnesota podcast produced by NAMI, Minnesota, the National Alliance on mental illness wellness, listen color is a podcast series that explores perspectives on mental health to reshape the cultural language of mental illness. Visit NAMI Minnesota online at NAMI N dot org. Subscribe to the podcast and listen on the nominee, Minnesota website or wherever you get your podcasts. Your host for this episode is now me Minnesota staff member Caroline Ludi your co host for this episode is Maritza steal a member of the nominee. Minnesota multicultural young adult advisory board. And now, here's Caroline. Welcome to wellness and color before introduce our very first guest Catanzaro. Mattel and guest host Murtagh steel hike to share a wellness in color began our multicultural young adult advisory board helps me Minnesota and providing education and outreach to build positive relationships with Minnesota's multicultural communities over the past year board members have engaged in discussions of their personal experiences and those of their community when seeking understanding or help for their mental illness. Many of the discussions we build the discrimination that community members faced in their search for information or help a little bit of butter guest. Guitar Ellie, an educator artist in international published researcher Catania's shares her wellness and color story about living with postpartum, depression and her road to mental wellness after immigration to the United States originally from India geek, grew up in a variety of cities and has a deep. Appreciation for different cultures before coming to the US. She taught postgraduate English literature at Panja university. A strong advocate for social Justice gay is currently studying community health at Normandy college. These efforts were supported by the National Center for advancing translational sciences of the national institutes of health award number. You L one t r zero zero two four nine four the content is solely the responsibility of the authors in does not necessarily represent the official views of the national institutes of health Murtagh, take it away. Thank you. Caroline. Good morning. Thank you so much for being here with us today. Yeah. Good morning. I just wanted to ask you just to get the ball rolling. What does healthy mean to you for me healthy is a balance in your life, which is I know pretty hard to achieve these days. But definitely something when you feel mentally Haley physically healthy and spiritually healthy too. And it's a state where you are happy. And you think that you have control over some of the things that you want to do you can organize your life. And lead a life that you want to sometimes it won't happen. But at least, you know, that you have tried and you don't feel bad about it. And you keep on going. Okay. Thank you for that. And you talked about maintaining this kind of balance in terms of being healthy. How do you go about that? Yeah. Like you said it's not an easy task because every day. There are circumstances that you may not have foreseen. There are things that may happen. Sometimes it's your own physical health that might come in between. Sometimes it's your state of mind, your mental health that might interfere to maintain that balance physically you're should be in a good health. So that is the first thing to do. I would say, but at the same time, you should also pay mentally healthy. You should have. Good state of mind about yourself. You should value yourself, which is pretty important. And when you will you yourself, you know, what you want from your life, and you can make an effort to achieve that. So to maintain that balance. It's really important to know your own self to know, what you want and how you can achieve and once you make an effort towards that side, you know, you can achieve it and you'll make an effort and you'll definitely go towards that. Even if you feel sometimes you would keep on moving because that's your dream. So once you have a dream, you'll definitely move towards that and to maintain that balance. It's more like to take control of your health physically and also to work on your mental health at the same time. And I will also add that spritual health is equally important as far as I'm concerned because once you have. Faith. It helps you and it also helps in your mental state of mind because then you are not afraid of the coming circumstances that you feel that you can do what you want to do. They white beat events. There might be things that might be coming into your way. But definitely you'll keep on