20 Episode results for "Leila"
Metahuman: Notice Enjoyment
"The body mind and would when seen directly directly and without interpretation are actually when activity single activity you can't have one without the other you kind of the expense of the body without the mind you kind of expensive the mind without a body and you you can't have any experience of the world without the mind and body so their one activity in awareness given meaning and construct so even though we busy us as the thousand things day seeing the world as one thing happens automatically naturally to a devout believer that one thing is God God's creation Damore scientists that one thing is the physical universe but these are conditioned responses. What if you look at the world directly without the conditioned response take a moment today to do something that makes you happy it could be done to the friend appreciating the trees and the sky watching children on the playground. If your enjoyment comes from eating ice cream at midnight do that as well. It's perfectly fine. Whatever you're doing relax into your enjoyment and notice it okay relax into your enjoyment and notice the experience of enjoyment one you notice the experience of enjoyment just by noticing your enjoyment. You've put yourself into the eternal play of consciousness in sunscreen. That's what the Universe is. The play of consciousness and the word for that sounds good is Leila Leila's does the play of consciousness and who's by dissipating in that way of consciousness you are aw that includes the play of consciousness that we call the body and the mind as well because the body and the mind are part of the play their part of the Leila. You are not the LEELA. You're the player the dreamer conductor of the whole show
YouTuber News Trailer
"Hi I'm benedict towns and and welcome to you Chiba. News the PODCAST. That brings you all the latest breaking stories from the world of online video. That's right I gotta show gotTa snapchat show now. I've go to podcast. I'm like a badly Train onto many platforms. Did you get it from. I would put 'cause we haven't stole few they'll be guests. They'll be interviews interviews. They'll be jokes. Will be a mild amount of chaos. Be Questions from the from the audience than those guys so I have to. I'm legally obliged a fine questions nations from the audience and if we have time for maybe even some news it's just like former secretary. General of the United Nations Ban Ki Moon once said Youtube is really do be crazy. Leila specify banking and did not say that and we mean him. No disrespect so please. Please don't sue me again. You can subscribe right now on your favorite podcast APP so that you can can be the first to hear the show when it launches on November Fifth Youtuber News bringing you all the latest Youtube News since eighteen eighty six.
Season 1 coming soon.
"Test 1 2 okay, we on here. We ready here to my earphones. Matthew Leila Mooney here. If you were a former listener to our podcast or even if you have no idea what that's about. Hello. It has been a minute. We retired that podcast after a good run because honestly the world needs no more interview style podcast. Just an opinion Jenny and I are hard at work on a completely new life in different podcast. That will be releasing in season form soon podcast in story form Think This American Life only better that was a joke six episodes of Stories on our fragile and shared Humanity the entire season focused on sharing stories of viewpoints from our friends with disability. So in the meantime go to the atypical life.com and please drop us your email address. We will not spam you we will not be weird. We will not try to be your friend or act like we are but we will let you know when the podcast is ready. It's coming out and we may even give you a little early access to it, and we may let you in on some of the fun lot stuff that we have coming out. But really when you give us that email address when you do that little act of kindness you encourage US during this window of creating this thing. I am spending more hours than I care to let you know with no feedback in a tiny bathroom. And when I see that email address come through I'm going to smile and we all want that also you could follow us on Instagram at the atypical life for updates. And we'll have a few teasers there of some of the episodes that we have been working on. We're talking Faith disability the church healing talent shows and so much more cannot wage to share these stories with you. And as always we love you.
Violinist Leila Josefowicz performs Valse Triste
"Support for this podcast and the following message come from the almond board of California, representing California's almond community a collection of family run farms dedicated to making life better through innovation and responsibly producing a healthy food, more at almondsustainability dot org. I'm JoAnne Robinson. And thanks for downloading this week's bonus content podcast recently, the internationally renowned violinist Leauge Assefa wits hosted our program at the middle point of the show. She performed a turbulent and kind of spooky peace with their co host on that program pianist, Michelle can the entire piece wasn't included in the main broadcast. But it was so captivating that we had to make the whole piece of elible here. Please enjoy Voss traced written by Jean Sibelius. And now we Michelle cannon, I will play another unexpected. He's of music you like to do this, don't you? You're getting the idea. But this one is an arrangement of a orchestral gem. That's often, I think, played as an encore with major symphony orchestras. It's often been that incredible thing that comes after all the applause of the main program Sabet is vaults. Tree st- sad, waltz a woman who's life is about to end probably very, very sick and weak joins. A group of waltzing ghosts wants to join in with them. They don't really accept her so openly. And she says, dance dance with me dance with me, and finally, she joins them on only to find at the end of the waltz death is standing at the door ready to escort her. And I was, I had to say that Leila, you mentioned you gave me a reference of the haunted mansion. Yeah. Right. Disneyland's haunted of both of them exit inland and DisneyWorld. Right. And that was a perfect picture. So if you've ever been on that, right? I think that pretty much gives you a nice visual. Yeah. It does it does. But this is one of my absolute favorite pieces and I was really so kind of excited to find a violin piano arrangement of this so vol's traced by Sibelius. Thanks for listening to this bonus content podcast to hear the full episode featuring guest host, Leila Josefa wits along with six fantastic young musicians download show, three sixty nine Boston, Massachusetts, and we'd love to hear from you. You can leave us a message on our Facebook page Facebook dot com slash from the top fans or on Twitter at classical kid, or find us, an tunes and leave us a review.
Bar Zabaleta en San Sebastin De Donosti al cielo 101
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The Great Gildersleeve 48-02-18 (278) Leila's Cousin Adeline Fairchild Arrives
"Food Company present Herald Perry as the great, Gildersleeve. The, the Great Gildersleeve is brought to you by the Kraft Foods company makers of Parque Margarine every day. Millions of women all over America serve parque margarine because it tastes so good. Morning. Thank you. You. Are K Y parque margarine made by CRAFF. Let's see what's going on in Summerfield. It's Saturday noon. The Great Gildersleeve is walking home from the office. Happy in the thought of quiet restful weekend ahead. deedee I'm contented hedy, and at the same moment in paintings, drugstore, jealous leaves, friends, or deepen conversation their heads close together. And she's coming in on the twelve forty trade. You don't say. I got our last night together house already far and she's leaving ranch next. Yeah, she's from the same town. Savannah name is Adeline. devereaux fair check. It. Doesn't. Ring to it. because. She's in, Bell. Now I think ring bell again the literature. Yes, yes, I know. I'm meeting this Fairchild. The training just a little ring there. Was Jan humorous on. He. I'm trying to explain something to you. I prefer that you say nothing investigating. If he knew that I were meeting this attractive young lady, he'd be ride down there. Trying to buddy and you know how excited he gets whenever a new woman comes. Does make me frisky. Neil find out about us. After all cheat moving in right next. Ardo Moon should be very interesting, so let's keep this a secret from. Don't forget PD Mum's away. Again. News the way. After all he's my client. Well Al Daryl Ran Gilded. It's me What's the matter with you? What are you looking so guilty about? All this? Whispering came in when spring. There's something funny going on around here. Noticed anything funny have you. Can Ring Van. Look what you to talk about when I came in Shasta, little private. Thing, you wouldn't be interested in what did he? Say that. What's that? Later Devin. Mister Gatti's may have to sweep out your tobacco just a minute to talk to you TV I. Smell something fishy around here. Could be. Now if you. Don't run away. You're not fooling me. You in the judge. We're talking about me, weren't you? Tool coots. Okay, what you're saying about me doesn't worry me. Don't tell me you can just keep it to yourself you. Know you, won't you tell me? I came in here. The judge was telling you something wasn't. And it was about me. Wasn't it Well. What did he say? You. Really WanNa, know yes, what did the judge say? Mums were only. The use I'm going. That's right miss, Marjorie. On the front porch, chicken at the dust mop and I heard the judge Tom to the mailman. Today where we might have well facing donkeys headed for a new romance here we go again. Watch don't tell, aren't even we're talking about. What's going on here? How long? Is usually high on. What are you all whispering about? What's the matter with everybody today? What's going on in my back? Well, see you later on got to wash out my second. From homework to do well, get out the kitchen just a minute. All of you you're keeping something to. Laugh yes, you find out sooner or later. Find out about what very. Port shaken dust. Heard him talking. You earn them talking about. That Miss Guilty I did happen to him I, wasn't he stopped? I didn't say you were ready. WHO Talking? Shaking the best my I love these jobs. I didn't make you you of eavesdropping what? What did you hear well? Judge tell the mailman. Ms Atlanta Bachata moved in next door misaligned fairchild race yourself on. She's Leila ransoms cousins. What yeah she's moving in today. Next Door I. Don't get excited Dong. Why don't you sit down for a minute? You look a little Pale. Get your water matter with you, too. I'm alright. Of course I am. That's what all the shooting is about A. Peavey and that judge. Everybody acts like all I. Ever think about is women. I've got other things on my mind, too. Whole thing is ridiculous, just because some woman moves in next door and I. Just hope you'll be a little careful Through when Leila Leftovers IR children may not know it, but you rolled onto a changed man. I'll admit that I have sometimes loved not wisely, but too well. That's all over now. New. Neighbor means nothing to me. Nothing what Sir! where? Getting out of the judges car. Lord. I thought you weren't interested. I'll just natural curiosity. Look at the judge. Taking her by the arm, he'll go that silly grin. He Pretty Neat All I. Uh, shoes rather attractive. They can to. Not Bad. For Peace and a pair salts. Looks quite a bit like Leyla Walk to guess all southern women walk like that. He's kind of cute at that. Nice smile twos. Leila used to smile at way. You're weakening. You might as well go over neater now and get it over with. Wouldn't hurt just to drop over for a minute. Knack neighbor no logo. Leila but I've learned my lesson. No woman has ever GonNa. Make a fool of me again. Women. Yes My, they're. Just thinking. Females I. Don't know. On my dear, I'll be down a little while. And Line Fairchild. Nice name. Funny how much she looks likely. Same come hither look. It runs in the family. Meal. Scream to me. Of Love. Leila. You almost broke my high, but I'll never forget you. Still got all your little letters here this cigar box. Rose colored envelopes. Purview. What's the Guy Doing in here? We see. One relentless. My Darling Throckmorton. I think you are the most wonderful man in the entire world. One thing I love about you is your so understanding. Sweet! So, I know you understand if I break our date tomorrow night so I go out with Dr Hargrave. She was pickled. I keep these letters. Cousins probably just like. Women are nothing metropolis. Awfully Nice to have around sometime You're never know what they're gonNA do next. Fun Cut Up to on the SOFA. What's a man to do? We can't live with them. We can't live without him. Trapped The Great Gildersleeve and just a minute. You know her friend. Birdie is considered a pretty hard gal with the dime. Nowadays, you got to squeeze keyboard that you buy parque margarine, Verdy Oh. That's only part of it well. Mostly. I buy pocket tastes so the fact that parque cost less today than it did. A year ago doesn't make you mad though as Still the important thing is that delicious parque flavor why millions of families know that tasty parque margarine is a perfect topic for roles. Muffins pancakes Waffles as well as breads can't be beat for cooking a season. Either Right Parque is craft, product and craft means quality park is made from only carefully selected farm products, and each tempting wholesome pound is defined with fifteen thousand units of essential vitamin A. That have them. As. Yes, Ma'am! Has got everything at tops for flavor. It saves you money. It gives you the kind of nourishment you need. Parque margarine is a better by for both bread and budget, and remember millions of women all over America Sarah. Parque margarine just because it tastes so good that fee a R k. a.. Y., Parque Margarine May by crafts. And now back to the Great Gildersleeve. The great man spent the afternoon wrestling with his conscience. It was a hard fight, but he's finally won. The decision is going to forget all about women. Some men joined the Foreign Legion to Forget. Some men go to see. some. A HAIRCUT Well? Come in love Lloyd up right in the chair. No waiting. Business is Russian. Russian by? Salvageable. This is nice. Very relaxing sure. Nothing like sitting in a barber charity to make a man forget his troubles right? How do you want your head cut today? Southern, style. Nothing nothing. Back, relax! A. Swan. I love them old southern tunes. Southern Dame's ain't that commission. Lloyd I get along without your heavy handed. Humor is because Lena's cousin moved next door to me. Oh she did lose if you didn't know. I'll tell you one thing. Floyd I'm not the least bit interested in Fairchild, not one least bit. Given the matter a lot of thought floyd come to the conclusion that women are everything sure. There's gotTa. Make up your mind not to let women bobby. That's all I gotta hand it to you. Commissioner that takes willpower all right now. Not so much just a minute while i. turn the chair around. Hey. How do you like my new calendar? On the wall up there the Tiger Route Chiampou. Man Left it. Really. The Pippen. Dame br every month. Classy and Well in February and that ski suit. I'd like to go skiing with her. You Ain't seen nothing. Where are you going? I want to tell you the rest of the girl but I. DON'T WANNA see! Here's Miss March on a windy day while he put that thing away. Matt Commission names on body you. You Got Willpower. Here's Miss April. He admits May and a little tennis outfit. Wave on. Here! I'll get my haircut some other time. July on the beach. This is the way to spend an evening alright sitting by the fire, comfortable chair, reading a good book. Wants to be out. Give me a fireplace. And a good book. and See me get comfortable. that. Fairchild playing with. Their. Plays Worse Than Leila did? Can I read my book when she. Can't give you anything but love. Playing that for my benefit. Won't do any good. This read my book. She can play all night for all. She stopped. On the way she did. Maybe, she's going out with somebody. Like just look out the window and see who she with. When dissolved frost and can't see it. Lean little! Muscle letter see. Cool out here. What Just stuck my head out. But was snowing. I couldn't even be. I'm from a girl that and talk to a man that had been formally introduced. You know manager so bold. I'm. Admiral Thad. Walk more. Teeny weeny bit. Be Gillislee. Chilly out here Nice Michio. Back my book. Yes. The minute I laid eyes on you. I knew you were the intellectual. Fara gave away. Knowing something awful rain colic. Not Exactly, I'm the commission here. It's just a job. The commission just a man looking for news. Hit in, Makia cheese. Abdrei and Thing. That isn't exactly my life. And! You can't take. Can Do. I can fix it all right, but. Leave your show. Evanston gratitude. All it needed was a new washer. Man is so clever about these things. I would have thought of that. Yes Mike. My Grandmother Dave Rowe always used to say there's one thing a woman needs around the house. I. Don't want him. Pose that as long as you're here I. Wonder if you'd mind putting in some light bulbs from the will really should be going to do it. Michelle is too hard for me to reach every time I. Stand on a Chad makes me. CRAZY YEAH! I guess you follow me, we'll. Oh. The last bulb business. Oh. Now. You WanNa. Take My. Take your hand. Yes. He. then. My Man, he so small when you hold it in your. Excuse me maybe A. Man Must be completely worn out climbing up and down. Why don't you sit down and? Really ought to be getting back in my book. Yes, home, in L.. Maybe just a minute I am a little tired all law. Why don't you take this? Put this panel back a your wear a hair. Comfortable. I'm fine. Hit on the SOFA. You planning to stay here in San, field very long. Fairchild rail that depends on whether astle manage strong attachment here. You know Mr Gildersleeve. He'll I've known you all my life. Leila's told me so much that. She did ask you will produce. Wait on, her went. Sean I don't like to say this about my own fashion blood but I. don't think causing Leila was very nice to you. Say let bygones be bygones. Ballots, he'll such a big person. Will I'm going on a Diet Oh. I didn't get it. Thank you. For being so fickle, and then trying to make up with all that sweet talk and flattery, she should have known that someone like you is too intelligent. If landed a man with a high followed. Professor Einstein where we you. Gildersleeve born. Over twenty second thought, you're a Scorpio. Scorpio I, am yes. You have all Scorpio's holidays all right? You're strumming nine. You're a leader of man. Never Thought of myself that way, but I see what you mean. Told me something else about you. Said Your, God yes. No I love to hear you saying something well. Keep you know your her ready? Get Back Oh. One course won't take very long. You play speaking me of love. Leave I thought that some were sacred to you and Lena. All right. To me! And say. Long. A? Repeat them again Oh? Speedy you. These were meaty you. All. Um. Life. Your your real Lawrence. Tibbett Thanks, it's just a natural talent. No trading now Michigan loosely up carried me away on the wings of Song. Heroes! down. Mind if I sit there to float down. This is Nice here on the Sofa. And not crowding him I. Gas Not Lovely dress you Larry. Yes an old. Shoulders little chilly! If I just put my I'm around now, Miss. Leila only about you. Don't believe everything you hear. Lean right back and behave yourself you. Come on one little kiss never heard. Anybody believes Mr Gildersleeve. Sometimes, one little kiss can lead to a broken home. Kid No I'm not. That's why Savannah to escape the memory of romance that flowered and died. I didn't know a man could be so many in cruel. Of course, he was edgy terriers you. I'm sorry. The Ash. Seasonal and I were engaged for fifteen years on. Young when I first met in. Here, I am in this big house. Lump sum little me. Don't worry. You won't be too many more. I'm right next door, you know. Thank you. So understanding. Feeling Akkad depend on you bet you can. Just. Put your head on my shoulder and. Throughout Morton all about it. She'll you don't want to get back to your book now? Who wants to read a book? What the heck. Builders, we'll be right back. Check your next shopping list lady, have you remembered Parque Margarine? It's better by for both Brad and Budget Delicious Parque. Margarine the Margarine of craft quality is made from only the finest products of American firms. It smooth, delightfully tasty. Each rich nourishing pound contains fifteen thousand units of essential vitamin A park as the better by for your budget parque. Bread for America's bread actually costs less today than it did a year ago. Actually cost less than a year ago. Treat your family to this perfect express for roles, muffins, pancakes, waffles, millions of families all over America you parque margarine, because it tastes so good that p. a. r., K. A. Y. Parque margarine made by crafts. Beer diary. Tonight I met at line devereaux Fairchild. Women dear diary. But that line is different. She told me all about her unhappy romance with seafood. He was a cad. Course. He was a Sagittarius. She's just a helpless little girl and she needs someone to protect her. She'll be safe with me. Tomorrow night we're going to the movies. Wonder if she let me kiss her. Women are wonderful. Good night, the Diary Unite Folks. Gilders Navy play by Harold Curry at align, Fairchild, I miss. The show was written by installed and Jack Robinson with music by Jack Meakin included in the cast Walter. Louise's Eric Lillian Randolph Earl Lawson Richard Legrand. This is John Wall. Saying good night for the Kraft Foods company makers of the famous line of craft quality, Products Tomorrow Night Charles. Boyer will be Al Jolson Gas on the Kraft Music Hall heard on the most of these NBC Station Dog Missing Remember Tomorrow Night. Exact time your local paper and be sure to listen to next Wednesday, and every Wednesday or the further adventures of the Great Gildersleeve good night. Here's a suggestion for a quick easy Lennon. London. It's macaroni and cheese made the modern way with kraft dinner. Each package of kraft dinner contains enough quick cooking, macaroni and golden craft graded the make four generous servings of macaroni and cheese floppy, like macaroni, brand, Cheddar, cheese, flavored and every tempting food. What's more aches only seven minutes cooking time? Your family. We're like this marvelous macaroni and cheese so that it's a good idea to have several packages of kraft dinner on hand, so you can serve it often. This NBC the National Broadcasting Company.
The Productivity Mindset - Leila Mozaffarian
"You're listening to the sales success. Stories podcast what we deconstruct. World class sales performers to provide insights and strategies to help improve to learn more. Visit US at top one. Dot FM. Here's your host Scott Ingrown. Today on the sale. Success Stories podcast. I've got another presentation from the last sales success summit if you're newer to the show. I released interview episodes with number one and top one percent sales performers every other week in the in between weeks. I'll typically share either one of the stories from one of the sales success stories books or like today a presentation from a previous sales success summit. The next summit is coming up on October Twelfth and Thirteenth here in Austin and you can find all the details at top one summit DOT com. This presentation is from Lima's a affair and and is titled the Productivity Mindset. This is all about the idea. That productivity isn't just about what you do but also why you do it and how that why can drive you to do more and be more. It's probably also worth noting that Leela is no longer with ZIP. And she just recently made the transition to sprout social where she's working as of mid market account executive. Well that's more than enough preamble. Here's Leila Hi. Everyone thank you so much for coming in today. I know you're here for me so I appreciate your support during this time. A little bit of background on what I do ZIP when I started. I came straight out of college and so for me I knew I want to go into a text messaging service like I just knew that was my passion realistically. I honestly just wanted to find a job. That was an assassin company. Because I'm in Seattle. So what better than that and I wanted it to be somewhat of a startup so that I could learn you know how business grows how it fails so that one day can apply the same things to ideally my own business. When I started we had about sixty in about three years. Now we're going around three hundred yesterday. We made a big move actually from one part of Seattle to another so in a new location and expanding so it's been hundred miles an hour and when I say that I'm GonNa Count Executive what that truly means that. Zip with is that you go and find your own leads. You create the marketing content. You do all of your prospecting you set up your demos your dials like you do everything right and then from there once you close the deal you managed the account the email you something goes wrong you handle the billing someone gets swiped too much too little you get that call. So it's the entire process from my experience and as we've grown obviously implemented SDR teams in customer success teams. But when I started we didn't have a ton of resources now before I go into bit too much about my personal journey I wanted to introduce my family like mom you're famous essentially. This is my mom and dad the tool Persian people on my left and right. This is my parents. My mom is one of the most inspirational amazing hardworking. People that I've ever met. I owe everything to obviously. My father was a doctor. He was my first manager so every manager since then has been a breeze even though it's sales managers so for him getting up at five and being at work and having that patients like every time a patient would call in and scream at me. I was like fifteen summer job. Like not understanding why. They're so upset with me when I order prescription to the pharmacy He's like you have to remember their patients right at the end of the day. You're trying to help someone. And that was something that allowed me to be really successful in sales because I have a lot more patience when it comes to folks on the phone when you're doing calls and you're trying to and things of that nature and then on the other side of my father is my sister. She's the one who edits my essays. Helped me get through college? Side detention slips in high school. She's the one who supported me through everything I look at. It was like a second mother And so if it wasn't for my family I really wouldn't be where I am today. Part of the podcast and the reason. I always bring up the stories because it's just been my life for the last three years. My father actually got diagnosed with stage. Four colon cancer in January two thousand seventeen in the same month. My Grandmother was agnes with cancer. I broke up with someone I was with for five and a half years that I thought I was going to marry and then on the side of that my mom was like. Oh I haven't contributed. Let me get in a car accident. Real quick can just add that to the list and my sister had this brilliant idea of getting pregnant so it was just this mess of everyone doing everything and of course during that time. I was like you know what I'm here. I'm the youngest should contribute to so I got foot surgery so I'm not only like cool little crutches but they handed me a scooter to scoot around the office with a basket. And I'm on all guys team so they put their drinks in it and they're like slowdown so it was just literally the turn it into a joke but it was like the biggest by far right. Which kind of led me into one thing. I can only control one thing in my life at that point. I couldn't control my family getting sick. I couldn't control my sister pregnant control anything. By the way it was an accident was intentional. Love my nephew to death just to be clear it was meant to be but I mean one of the things that I could control was making money only way that I can help. Support my family at the time and for my father specifically they told us that for Chemo. If insurance doesn't cover it's ten thousand dollars every two weeks and so. I don't know if you know this but it tech startup. You're generally not making twenty K. After taxes and so for me straight out of college I just knew that I could make as much money as they can as fast as they can so it was just really motivating to have that behind my back so one of the things I wanNa do first is just define what it means to be productive so productive achieving are producing an amount a result a significant amount result. And so this is really a very simple concept first but I want you to think about what? It means to have an outcome. A lot of people think it means acidy positive right now. I want to give you an example. Let's say you call ten people for specific franchise and in the first set of calls that you make you that one demo you know productive you set a demo. You have a meeting great now. Let's say you call that same franchise and you call another ten people. But this time you make zero demos rate does that mean that. It wasn't productive. Does that mean it was a negative outcome? Well maybe on the second set of those ten dials. You Talk to three different decision. Makers the first one tells either now moving to a corporate top down. Approach the second. Tell you that they're in a hiring freeze giving you some insider information and the third tells you that maybe they're already using a vendor that does something similar. This is the type of information that you're picking up on that you might have never gotten from that demo right. So does that mean that. Your time wasn't productive because you didn't set it demo or does it just simply mean that it was set up in a different way the things that. I'M GOING TO COVER TODAY. I mean I'm talking to the best of the best rate. I'm not going to undermine that you all don't understand no these concepts and while they seem very simple. I think they're really important to cover right. The different things that I wanNA cover the seven characteristics to have like a person to have that productivity mindset right again as Scott mentioned. My goal is to connect the two pieces of your mindset and turning into productivity so one what is your why. What's your motivation? Why do you get up in the morning? Who are you doing this for for me? At the time it was a need right. I had to do what I could to make money. It wasn't really as much of want like I want to buy a house. I want to go on a trip. It was. I needed to make money in order to keep my father lives and I think one of the things. That's really interesting here is your wife is going to change. It's going to go up and down rate maybe right. Now you're like I just want to travel go buy a house and have fun right but why do you want even do those things to begin with and understanding your? Why is the first step to having predictive outcomes right? If you don't have a goal in your mind it's really hard to produce results off of nothing so this is really the first thing I would consider the most important step. If you don't have a why I really recommend on your drive home on your flight home. Whatever it might be think about what your purposes. The second thing is persistence. Now when I said persistence. I'm not talking about your manager. Comes up and like smile and keep going. Just keep dialing. I'm bragging about persistence and not giving up. One customer says no right. I've had so many rejections customers. Line me that they don't want to sign up with me customers. Who literally just like. We don't like you for your product or for you. Whatever it might be and one thing that I've learned that I'm not persistent in trying to close the deal. I'm persistent in trying to keep that relationship I've had folks who have like actual corporate structures were. They can't make the decision but as we heard yesterday folks move jobs so when they leave they'll call me at their new office and then sign up with me because they have that power now to make that decision to me. The greatest like idea of building a relationship with the customer is when they tell you know but you call them three months six months nine months a year down the road and you get feedback on what they're using how it's working. They give you the pricing structure. They show you through their screen. Sure what the other platform looks like. And you get that insider knowledge that you'd never get elsewhere right. Those are the types of relationships and persistence. I'm talking about. I'm not just talking about keep dialing them and keep bugging them until they sign up. I'm talking about building actually ship. I had customers literally referred me business even though they haven't signed up because of the relationships we built so keep with them keep persistent and don't forget about what they can offer you. Even if that bright like that moment is specifically when they sign up the next thing is vision so vision to me is something that I actually literally visualize as a kid we were told you know like closer is when you go to bed and visually. You're going to be so like last night my head. I was just like this is where I'm going to stand in this. I'm going to talk. And hopefully they smile sometimes and it'll be okay a delight we'll be writing off so they don't see me or I don't see them but essentially like you have to visualize where you WANNA be. Where do you want to be in your career? Where do you WANNA be on that deal? How do you want to see that happen right? Visualizing what that is really important but having a vision journal right when I came to the company I got you know. I didn't know that I was going to have a career and so when I got promoted the first thing that asked my managers. What's the next step? And there wasn't really a next BRO. Ready Ourselves crear. We can just wasn't so my manager and I was like well right now. The mental roles like really great. And I love helping people. But what about high performers. What's next I want? I want to be here. I don't WanNa just make money like I want to have an opportunity to keep growing and basically what we did. Is We sat down together? We created a proposal for the VP of sales. And we said okay like this is what we're doing. This is where we wanna be this going to retain our sales team and it's not just the people who want to go and help but it's also the people who want to outperform. Have THE NEXT GIG. Like have the next okay. This is now my new account size. This is what I'm managing now are. These are the next steps. I'm taking to grow a career path even at a small tech company my number one recommendation with folks that I've mentor does not go to your manager and say I need you to make me a job so I can get promoted. You really need to come up with a plan right. You need to explain why it's valuable not only to yourself but the sales team as a whole and honestly just like the biggest learning opportunity for me. There's a lot of pushback and we had to go back and forth a little bit like why I thought it was important to have certain structures and why the sales believe there's other structures that were important so I would definitely recommend when you are creating any type of vision for yourself and you're the one introducing it to the company. Have an idea of how you want to see that. Play out and work with them on making that happen. I really like this quote and I know you all can read but just to reiterate the point when asked. My Cup is half full or half empty. My only response is that. I'm thankful I have a cup now. This is all about having a positive attitude. I have to tell you like. There's this law of attraction that I truly believe in right the placebo versus the CBO fact. Let's say I have a really bad headache. And you hand me a pill and it's sugar pill but you're telling me it's GonNa fix my headache. If I really believe is GonNa fix my headache. Boom headaches gone perfect placebo factory now on the flip side of that. Let's say that I wanNA take the perfect you hammy Appel. That's really going to help me. And for whatever reason I just believe that it's a sugar pill so my head remains it's all about the law of attraction now at the time. Trust me when I'm in the Er my father just got a perforated for those of you. Who Don't know what that means. It basically means that you're calling hairs and so it goes into your stomach which essentially means you've twenty four hours slaves when I get that news. I'm scooting around and I have little nurses making fun of me rape and then I have my mom who English. Our third language and. She's just confused. So we're just GONNA leave it at that. And then I have my pregnant sister waddling around like throughout the hospital and bidding news like this and then I get an email coming from customer saying. Hey you've had downtime for ten minutes and this nasty email. I wasn't in the most positive mood but the way responded to that email was high. Frank always great hearing from you. I'm so sorry to hear this happened. I'm on it. I'll get back with US quickly as they can. And you have to understand. In that moment I was Franken. I we've become friends since but in that moment like I remember that day pretty well but the way responded to his email when he responded back to me like. I just wanted to apologize like I know it's on you. You don't run the telecommunications network. It's not your fault I Apologize. And we've had a good relationship since the that type of attitude that you have towards your own mindset the people that you interact with and this is something that. I learned a very young age when I was three learning how to walk. Maybe run by that point. I started doing karate. I did karate for about fifteen years and one of the things that they taught us is the second that you walk into the DOJ everything had rate at the time it was like the bullies and school and Homework and whatever but I took that mindset into work every single time I foot foot into the office. I'm not negative. I don't you know like sales as hard as it is. And if you don't have your team to support you have the people around you to support you going to be very miserable pace right. It's all about having a positive attitude being okay with all of the different things that happened losing a deal and realizing that it's just one more no closer to a yes. The next thing is getting a routine so I know that we all say that we have a really good cleaner chain but I think one of the ideas here is just making sure that your adoptable to the routine. That comes up right what I mean by. This could be as simple as I'm going to schedule a five minute. Coffee break okay. So you're walking to the coffee machine and then you like but just some people and then twenty minutes later. You're like so the coffee machine so schedule those times. It's okay to have breaks. It's okay to schedule a lunch period. It's okay to take a breath. It's okay to call your mom. It's okay to spend that time but get getting routine where you can have that but also be adaptable and two thousand eighteen I spent. I think we're GONNA be one hundred nights in the hospital with my dad and those aren't even counting the days the nights but one of the things that I adopted two literally having a routine of how am I going to get my work done. And how many GonNa hit quota right? This wasn't like I'M GONNA lose my job or I'm not going to make money again. This was like really important to like proper former like make a lot of money and so one of the things I would do is when I was sitting there late at night out. Connect with people on linked in. Right is something that I could do in the afternoon. Maybe I can't call them without one option on my drives in To go from like where I was from the hospital to work was like a more extended traffic route so I would save five phone numbers and my notes and Little Siri. Would you all my calls for me on my way so I would literally be cold calling? I was driving into work to just save on some dial time. I was sending demos on the road. Now I'm not saying I hope no one ever has to go through that type of routine but you have to be when things come up. Bright kid get sick from school. You want to go on vacation. And we're carrying a month to month quota. We're not on like quarterly or annually. Like deal size of that nature. It's all month to month so every single day matters so get into routine to make sure that your dabble to something coming up and working around it. We're trying to take me to like focusing on one thing. At a time. We grew from sixty people to three hundred people. You have to understand. There's a lot of change that happened during that time right we had. Sdr teams joined. I was he's going to dial for me. Like someone's going to take over my conversation and then had to like hand that off to a customer success person who's GonNa Manage my account and not lose it and then up sell it somehow and so. That was a lot of change but the only thing that I could control was blocking out the noise right so the one thing I would focus on is having a list. It's not so long. That it stresses you out so much that you can't take care of it but rather having something that you focus on first thing in the morning right. My number one hit and life is cold calling. I can't do. I'm just like the worst cold caller of all time but the thing is I would get it done first thing in the morning because after that everything else was a breeze doing a demo connecting with the customer having internal conversations talking about workflow everything is easy so focused on that and what are the other things is at the time. I think you'll hear a lot of people who've had a lot of success. Have those like bad voices in their head? One of the things that I was hearing a lot was young. This is your first job college. You're Persian and mind you. I'm selling to automotive so if anyone doesn't know what the dealership space looks like. They are very kind people who are very experienced who've grown up in the industry right so I'm not the persona to be selling to them. I'm a girl I'm young. I'm on experience. I Persian honestly like it makes all the difference right and one of the things that I learned is just blocking out the noise because all I had to do is educate myself to know as much if not more than them on what I was providing as a service that was it. It was as simple as that. All I had to do is focus on what I needed to know. In order to build their trust and once you focus in on yourself it kind of I think makes a lot of difference just because in sales you kinda feel like a number sometimes on a board right and you're worried about what everyone else is doing but if you just focus like I rarely check what other people are doing because I just know that I want to beat my own numbers. That's what matters to me if you're not worried about what everyone else is doing. I promise you you will go so much farther like learn from people I've mentors but don't worry about the scoreboard so much worry about what you're personally doing to contradict this a little bit. Mindfulness right. Mindfulness is very important for yourself. What are you doing and why are you doing it? What is the purpose of what you're doing but also I think more? So being mindful about your surroundings being mindful about the people around you when. I have a customer call me and tell me Leela I just had to fire someone. We just lost someone at the company. My business is literally going down for whatever reason right. Be Mindful of that. These people aren't just credit cards. Like yes you're talking to businesses right like for me. I'm doing business to business sales and every single day I see them as like a piece of cash rate but at the same time they're human beings don't forget that right like I had a customer true story had eight locations signed up and then he called me one day and I missed his voicemail but that voice like stayed with me for so long. Three of his businesses floated so literally his dealerships like floating in water and hit to cancel the stores and he was asking about contracts. And like can I get out of it or do off the number and my email was four lines of hey? I'm so sorry this happened. I can't imagine what you're going through. This is the livelihood of your people your employees. Their families already going to this business. Lost like what's going to happen to all of them have families who are within that right and then and three bullet points. Billing tasseled support is handled. And let me know if you knew anything else for training on the new team to I got a call from the same guy and he says I want to add five accounts. And I'm like okay like did you just opened five stores like literally lie to me and I just get scammed but then I realized he wanted to add to his other five locations so even though we canceled those three he moved everything towards my like hit like our platform essentially because he no longer wanted to work with the other vendors that they had like the completely cancelled everything else because of the response city got the level of trust rate. People buy from people they like they buy from people they trust and sometimes as simple as just. Hey Frank frigging sorry. I'm really sorry that this happened. Or it's really great to hear from you. You might not really see that in the moment verve remember like building those relationships and like having that level of trust with them and caring about who they are being empathetic and being real is really important. Now kind of a secret here that I want to cover with. You is a lot of people. Ask Me Leela like be honest like actually how do you manage your time and like whatever right like one didn't sleep for a very long time? Which was not healthy for anyone. So I don't recommend that but to I think one of the ways that I set up myself for success from the very beginning was putting my eggs a bunch of different baskets right and I'm GonNa read a chapter on this for the sales success volume to you about but essentially the idea here is each of these are different bucket. One's called calls when the emails ones in and social media wants customer for Oes and then once you know like your inbound marketing team right so when I'm out for the month and I am too busy to do cold calls. I have the other buckets that I can rely on to bring money in. I don't care if you're in a territory if you're in an industry if you can do small business and big business for me. I was focused on an industry so I did all levels of sizes right a teeny tiny little mom pop shop so they could close quickly. I didn't midmarket. I did franchises. That could have bring in like easy revenue and then I had like enterprise accounts that I worked on for years to close and this is really what set me up for success and I think you have to really understand like this funnel of just different things coming in. If let's say your customers aren't referring you business then you have. Those costs rely on. You're not losing all of your buckets. So I'd really recommend like if you have not set it up this way now having away so at any point if you lose one bukit you have other ones coming in really quickly. If you head I really appreciate it if you could take a moment to close your eyes and this is a very simple activity. I want you to think of your reason. Why what is the purpose that you have? Why are you in sales or in the role that you're in? Are you doing it for yourself? Are you doing it for someone else is this? What's the point right? Why are you doing what you're doing every single day and I want you to open your eyes and that was like a quick ten fifteen seconds but if you can't immediately think of your reason why it's really hard right because it makes it really hard to go into the other characteristics or have a routine or go until what you need to do next for me personally? My wife changed in February. My father passed away this year and my wife completely changed. I no longer had that need. It wasn't even that kind of where is my what is my way and then I try to figure out what is it I want like is is what I'm doing is really. Ideally where I want to be but I'm I it's how you like not having a wise okay and trying to figure out is okay but definitely trying to find one right again on your road trip home on your flight home trying to think of your wife. You don't have one. It's really important to find it. One of the lessons that I learned throughout this time was not just you know Being productive but realizing that you can't do it alone and if I didn't build these relationships and this is something I learned in college. My mentor when I was trying to start a small side Gig. The number one lesson that I was taught was that it's not what you know. It's who you know. You have to build relationships both externally and internally for people to help you when I was in the hospital I needed help. I was putting in salesforce ticket to go through support to then. There was just not happening like I was not. I didn't have the time for it. I would immediately just slacker. Text I WANNA to take care of us for me and the relationship goes both ways right on the flip side of that. You know being in a company when they're sixty people. I am closer with this feelable. I do hang out with them more often. I do call them like friends more than managers kind of so when they needed something for me. I was there for them. I changed workflow routines. In order to help the company grow and become more successful and make their life easier but the next time. I was like Yo. Can you handle this training for me? I'm out someone had my back and so I think it's really important if you don't have those relationships built today to ensure that you have them And with that kind of being sat again the external relationships matter just as much for me again. My mom the motivation to everything I do. She's the light of my life and right. Now you know with my little nephew and my sister the best moms in the world right their minds. And they're the people I look up every day. I still do what I do for my dad. Still have that y but I just WanNa take a moment to thank them for everything that they've done and also to thank everyone here. Scott You provided me this opportunity everyone in this room and you gave me your time today to share my story which I haven't really done outside of the success community. It's not something that I'm super open about. It is really hard to talk about and keep it together for like this long but I truly appreciate it and I hope that in return at any point you know like a week down the road or three years down the road if we need a favor or I want to learn more on this if I can help in any way I would love to return that time to thank you for the time for buy today appreciate you got questions I expect. I expect this question line to be quite a bit longer. Everyone you know what's always resonated with me Leyland now. We talked about this last night at dinner. His you know driving humanity into your sales success and you gave tremendous examples of that really connecting the humanity of yourself and your y to your customer. So they feel that right. How'd you achieve that? Where does that? Where does that come from that? Become a thing honestly. This is kind of how I think about it. My First Job was for my dad. At a doctor's office I had pregnant. Ladies and old men come in those are the two doctors that I worked for and they were just patients like regardless of what happened and how they treated you and what they needed their patients sick. So everyone that I talked to you. I just think of what's going on in your life. What's on your little blackboard on your chest. Like what are you trying to say like what is going on through? That made you so upset or happier. Anger whatever and realizing that they're just people like everyone has shit like everyone has. Should we just have different kinds of it at different times? And so in my head the way I look at it as if you were patient right now I would be so kind to you because I'm like. Oh they're going through a rough time and so I just that that's kind of how I I'm not. I hope that no one has ever sick people. You're working with like in my head. I'm just like this is the way that they are and I just have to accept them for it. After realized there's something on that chalkboard that I just can't see the bay area inside of them and realizing they're just people and there's no point me hurting them or acting in a certain way not having that patients isn't going to help me or them is just gonNa make things worse. I don't know if your question. I know. It's fantastic as PERF. Thank you thank you for that. That was awesome. So can you explain how you stayed so motivated through? Like real serious challenges. Because I know I've had some of those moments in my life and sometimes I think like okay. Nothing else matters like screw my job like I don't even want to think about my quota right now but how have you been able to just stay so focused through these? Like real tough challenges. I definitely would have to be like transparent and saying that it's not. You're not always motivated. There are times where like my father passed on a Thursday in February. I showed up on a Monday to work. I've just how you when my little. Hr Director Lady of all time should it comes up to me and she was like get outta office. Like what are you doing here like? I realized the company was my support system like those people were with me for years. Scott was with me for years during this time like those are the people that I built relationships with and it wasn't that I was motivated. I don't want to be there. I just want someone else to tell me like. Hey We noticed that you're N we know so you're not okay your back and honestly for me. It wasn't that I always like self motivated and Mike. Push myself through it. Definitely the people around me. My friends my family. My coworkers for those of those like who knew they were like a tremendous support system and my manager actually changed like my my manager of a couple years from my Zipper job was gone in February as well so when I came back I had a new manager and she was like go. Take time like go focus on you like I don't even know you and you didn't make any money but like just go like take that time that you need and that to me was very motivational. Because I wasn't working somewhere. That was just it. Didn't care about they care about their people and I think that's another thing like it's about the surrounding of the company that you're out as well. I know that not every job will provide you those opportunities to like worker. Motor to be out of the office trait unless you're performing. Maybe I don't know it just depends but I think it was definitely like my motivation was inspiring other people and being like yeah like hearing the example of your cat died really doesn't resonate with me but I'm GonNa take it in the interest understanding that people were trying to support and help me and tell me that you know you'll be okay and like we got the same way that you helped us so I would definitely say it was just. It wasn't always myself I'd definitely had my depths but it was more just like the people around you lifting you backup. Halo your phenomenal presenter. Say That thank you. You helped me personally. I hope everybody. How can you keep talk a little bit more about how you look at others because I feel like you have this mindset of? It's it's really not just about treating the people the way you would want them to treat you. It's like how you treat others how they would wanna be treated themselves. So can you talk about? My question is kind of looking sometimes with others. You don't WANNA ask personal questions. You don't really want to get to know people at that level. So how do you get to know people at this kind of level and really kind of understand them? The way you're I guess so. You know good at so actually do ask. People like personal questions That's just me like I like people stories. I like knowing what they're about I like what motivates them and what excites them. So I actually do end up asking a lot of questions I would say if I'm understanding the question. I would say that one of the things that I just use like. If you spread kindness and positively people just gravitate towards you and sometimes it's really annoying like when you're just trying to do your work and then you have like fifteen people come up to you. Can you not today like can I just focus on me but I think a lot of times when you do have like a good vibe about you? People will naturally come to you but also just talked like sometimes like rain. Alvis speaking but a lot of times. They're trying to sit there and I'm like what's that and then they'll rant like this is what happened on and this is what went down and then just like sharing that story like why does that frustrate you and then like when. I was a kid. My Dad's This to me once so when someone tells me this this happens and I'm like looking at the sky and I'm like dude. You have three kids like we've got to figure this out now like you know and so that's just one of the things that like you just sometimes have to be quiet and listen and just see like what is their problem. Is it really that they just got hung up on? Is it really that they lost deal or is there something else? That's bigger that's going on and sometimes when you're just quiet and you just take in that moment and just try to understand their feeling and it's really awkward by the way like. I'm a very awkward human being so like just sitting there being like you know makes you live in Warren comfortable but it was just one of the things that I did. Last year is and I've grown connections from people who have left and they're like where you're at me recommendation to people who are like new companies and they told me about their new opportunities. How it's going and we remain as friends more so than just people who work together at some point. Maybe we'll see each other again one day. Thank you so much. If you'd like to hear more from Leila she was the star of Episode Fifty. Here on this podcast. And if you'd like to see the video version of this presentation where you can see the pictures of Leila's everything else just joined the listener list at top one dot. Fm and asked for the video. If you're already on listener lest you get my weekly emails and you don't already have access to Leila's presentation just reply to one of those notes and ask and I'll set you up then if you haven't yet registered for the next sales success summit. What on Earth Are you waiting for? You can get started and join us on our next networking call by clicking over to top one summit DOT com. That's T. O. P. The number one summit DOT com. Then be sure to come back week for another of my deep dive interviews. Where OWL deconstruct another world? Class sales performer lightly left. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening to the Sales Success Stories. Podcast to be sure you never miss an episode and for an invitation to our sales success community power by influence subscribe to our newsletter at top one dot FM.
The Great Gildersleeve 48-11-10 (303) Leila Ransome Back in Town
"The Kraft Foods Company present Herald Perry as the Great Gildersleeve. The Great Gildersleeve is brought to you by the kraft foods company makers parque margarine. Millions of women all over America Serve Parque because it tastes so good why parque tastes like it should cost twice as much. Them home against. You Pay Her. D. A. R., K. A. Y., parque margarine made by crap. Well there's an industry socialite of the summerfield indicator this morning. At a brilliant party last night. Adeline Deborah Fairchild a former Savannah debutante. And that was turned into Mr. Throckmorton P. Gildersleeve summerfield most eligible bachelor. Or only one jarring note. When a taxi pulled up and Gildersleeve saw his old life of love data steph out. Leila ransom is back in time. But our hero took is only a great man can. He fainted twice and had to be carried home. The next morning now and the Great Gildersleeve trudges downstairs to breakfast. Can't wait to get some black coffee. humoring. The baby up already. Yes, hello, little girl! Had Breakfast and I'm taking a staffer now. Well I hope you sleep better than I did last night. Little Baby. Yeah! You know what you got me into. You know that I am now and engaged man just because I want to adopt you. It's not. Like he had a big party skills. Leroy, yes, we did. The hit. Them came back. I was a little surprised myself well anyway, let's give me your all that the take a fatal step. That's the important thing. I think I'll go have some breakfast. It's on the table. Black? Coffee will taste good this morning. Good Morning Gene Can. I see. Your point me some coffee margie, please. Won't you say who? who I mean Mrs Ransom well I really didn't have a chance to talk to Leila last night. From combat to Taranaki well, that's her house. The data and lives in you know. She asked to check things. Witter's coming on Oh. Sure I bet she came all the way from Savannah just to see. Mich up and put on the storm Windows Marjorie. Let's not try to figure these things out. I think Mrs Robinson did the most dramatic thing appearing just at the moment your engagement without very. What did he do on? Walk Yellen Stop The music. Must be embarrassing girl. You're engaged to a your old sweetheart living in the same house. It's not embarrassing at all. And Corners Yakamora how you going to explain to where Marjorie I'm under no obligation to Mrs Ransom. None whatsoever was all over between us when she left town of course. However! I should atmosphere. Curious about what happened I'll just. Tell her what happened? You're still fond of watch module. You forget that I'm engaged Hispanic. Child I can't be fond of another woman. Leroy approved. Maybe a little hard for Leila understand that. I don't know why I should worry about what she thinks. Walked out on me. Still I feel better about if I had talk with her. I'll give her jingle right now. Now. Ms Well wait 'til. bessie comes to work. In the bad line answers bessie can hang up. secretaries are great comfort. Where is that Bessie? She's twenty minutes late. Leila looked lovely last night. Coming up the walk loaded with firs. Watch gillers you have to remember align. You're late to work again. Who? Genius Badger Engagement Party on the bus. And it was so interesting. I wrote at the end of the line. Secretary. Iota sleep right next to that social item that Mrs Leila Rows Massakin Town. Some data strange coincidence very strange. You don't suppose. She came back to throw a monkey wrench and your engagement or you? Mr Gildersleeve ranch have featured Mitch Gildersleeve. Know. Hang up your coat and get ready to make a phone call for. The years. Kuker! theon around this morning. There is and he's lovely. He's engaged. Goes, what's on your mind? I'm busy. I will take. I really thought you'd be interested to know that I'd have a little talk with delivers morning. You did property matters of Corso? More exciting than ever, but great of Diana. The Term Ellen of Troy the allure of Leo P-. Yeah LE- law right. Always, she judge rally. I can tell you more after lunch. We're dining together this new summerfield grill. Could it be fact friend that you'd like to be sitting in my place? Certainly not, why should I ask you bad Leila has invited you to join us. No. I shouldn't do it. I think I'll just call it. Judge Colleen Leila is never the same as. With the judge. What of some old gossip sees me Leela? She had me reserved that cozy, little private dining room dot, com. Room the Palmer I'll. It'd be bad chaperone. One o'clock yesterday wine do have some things to say to her. I won't go. Well I'm here. Waiting for a woman miss I, mean a man and woman. We reserve that Little Palm Room Guess I'm a little early. I'll wait for him back there. Probably shouldn't be having lunch with Leila. What the heck. Cooker! least. I should see her while she's here. Just real time shake. It is private. Little dark in here. I didn't see behind that potted palm. Edgy Common Shell. Out I'll pay for booth. Could come off Martin. Zone. Didn't know if shoot though but the judge. Oh. By the way, it is a judge. Oh, I'm fade! The judge will be unavoidably detained. You will. Geez, how do you know? How I got my property. Mattis shall mixed up. And the Paul man had to take his lunch out. Get them straightened by function. I. Guess you an hour, we'll just past the lunch. Leela a little devil. Thinks shows rock. same old Leila by George. It's good to see. You doing your hair differently. I'm. GonNa say Shampoo haven't even looked at minute. Well. I didn't think I should being engaged man. Oh. When a woman out Gosh it up. Be appreciated even if it is only to meet an old. Sweet. Yes I'M GONNA. Talk to you about that Leela. Showy Saddam. I didn't get a chance to explain last night. Are you angry Leland. GAELS best bark and becomes engaged to their cash. Who can understand better than that go? Lilly Youtube live. I'm glad to see it taken this because I knew you would. You're such a sincere level-headed, Gal? Track? Host! Congratulations I. Wish you every happiness. Ooh, thank you. And I hope you can find it with avalon. Schnabel on gauged married. I, bet you'll never think of the low Leila. Again do I. Will I'm afraid I think if you sometime. Frosty. Mean I am. I'm still shaking it from the congratulations. Cake, Carryanne To. Not. Remember that beautiful Shamma day we packed a lunch and went photo enough at grass, life but to. Just last. About got stuck on Ambon old strong. You carried me a shower and your own. because. You didn't want me to get my babe and she's. Yeah holding my hand again. Sorry Life Thought I was meeting your back to camp. Lead newish wings. You? Remember the Ocean Wind Eden Engine Ma Pa when we sit on the rug and forever phone pop cone. And the notch we just sat down. I like them best. Twelve Martin have you done that Marcona with my cousin? Add Line No. One before they were. Actually did have our engine. Like time. Matt Hot blooded. Spanish dancer came to town. And then you got sweet honest. Goodwin Ma you with a busy. Well you're engaged that Dr Julian Henry and you nearly married lightfoot. depre-. You weren't exactly I. Listen to you, but every spring my Ma Lot bush bloomed. We fell in love all over again flat. Head over heels. You. Those live action. And then you sing to me. Show viewed as knee. Pain, she avon anything you say well. He's saying. In a restaurant more we in a private dining room had come along now. I play the low Rotary Club. On the bench actress. Came to me. I'll be. A I never could refuse me. Let any home. Marshall! ME. Law Only. Replete! Again! We. ME were me. outdoor show. A matter of fact. I'm all mixed up. You, Downing telly all. What I WANNA do Leila. Wayne hoping to you. You know found the baby in the backseat my car. You just can't help loving you baby Leila. The law says I can't adopter until I get married and had line was the. Bed She was. And the next thing I knew I was engaged. Nasty line should be ashamed of ourselves. Like shooting fish in a bell tower. You'd WANNA. Make a home for the baby. Let, just anybody. Talk you into getting engage. been here, Louis probably wouldn't have happened. L. Shea. Say. been. engaged. Said Yeah. I say. Explain everything. It's the last week you can win a big beautiful Ford Sedan. Yes, if he wanted to share in fifty thousand dollars in prizes enter Park as final contest. For high-powered Nineteen, forty nine four door Ford sedans going to be awarded this week and grand. Prize, winner gets one thousand dollars cash. This is his. Ford so hurry up and enter this final week. Parque will also award board a general. Electric Table Radios Twenty. Four coffee makers, twenty toastmasters automatic prop toasters sixty new ten dollar bills now to go after your share of prizes. Just send us a suggested name for the Gildersleeve baby girl. Right it on a contest entry blank now available at your food dealers, complete rules or use the plane piece of paper. Entry Your name and address one red flat from the end of a package of parque margarine to Parque Margarine Fox seven, three, six Chicago seventy seven. Illinois be sure to employers. Your parque dealers name and address take advantage of this last opportunity to win. The high powered streamline nineteen forty nine four door. Ford Sedan Mail it now to Parque Margarine Bach seven, three, six Chicago seventy seven. Illinois, you still have a wonderful opportunity to win a new Ford, but only if your entry is postmarked by Saturday midnight. Well, let's rejoin the man with the ambidextrous heart last night. The Great Gildersleeve had an engagement dinner with Miss Adeline Fairchild and this noon. As it turned out, he had an. Luncheon with Mrs Leila ransom now he's returning to the office, trying to figure out what happened. I have a faint suspicion Leila tricked me into the. Garage she always been found to me. WHAT THE LANDLINE SAY! God. What will jury say? Hello Bessie. Remove rathenow allows Lance Roche I. Don't remember eating. Oh vesey. Watch it. You were Gone Salon I. A lot of. It's for you missed. Talking to anybody thank you, WanNa talk of his body. If like your lady love, which one I mean. A teeny weeny. She had a southern accent. Bessie, is it Mrs Robinson Fairchild for the van. Do Southern Accents don't say? Yes, Bessie, which one is it? Happy Misled Giles. Why can't find a way down here? A. Hello peavy. Do you. Fix me a double coke man can. Bring it to me in the back room background. Yeah and PD. Don't tell anyone I'm back there. Minds Naperville dated. Thanks. Rob a bank Michigan. Is Much worse than that PD. Keep a sharp look more than women I know come in. I'm on the lookout anyway. Expecting. To drop in the afternoon. You came downtown to have it a fix all. Nice engagement Friday last night. Hope. Nothing's gone now. Everything's gone wrong. I was trying to explain to Leila how I got engaged. That line I got engaged to Leila again. Ransom my mind to women. Isn't that awful TV? When? I don't know what to do. I just rest on my laurels you. Got Engaged to him and you had a busy twenty four hours. How peeved! Let's not be facetious. This whole thing's enough to make me WANNA. Go throw myself right in reservoir owner. Bright Time there are people who would consider you in a very favorable predicament. How can you say that? Make. You have a choice you. More than I can. Engage one woman. Factor on right now streets downtown, having her feet. Yes, I know PD. House your. I didn't have a challenge. To give you had to keep a sharp lookout for a woman. All up the back way PS advantage to go, Hey! Did you get your feet, tricks honey. Lloyd Wright is shaving media? Mind standing between me and the window. The commission cuts off the light. I might Nicu rather than have headlines. See me right now I'll take a chance ACA. Mish I gotTA handed to you. You have more fun than anybody, Floyd this is my view. You ought to be proud without commission you ought to be the happiest man in Summerfield engaged to seven chicks. You Really Eleven, please flawed I never shoulda told involve them curzon down south. Is that what they called Kevin Cousins? Floyd I'm not joking mood. About add lime things. I'm nothing more than a playboy, so I'd rather married a widow ransom when you well know Floyd, what commission I? Don't think you WANNA marry either one of them named Floyd I don't go around proposing to women with the idea of backing out. Okay I just had an idea how you could get out of it. Of course, you're interested. Absolutely, not what is it? Well Dame's is already got the impression. You're a little tickle. Why don't you go all the way all the way? You mean really proved to him to be trusted? Go home with a big confession commission that you're engaged to six other women, Floyd. That's ridiculous. I don't even know success. What may come up? manicurist to waitresses traveling saleswoman, a lady car hop from California. I've never been to California makes a good story commission and believe me the dame's a run from your likey was poisoned. Floyd I couldn't stick to that okay. For a guy overhead as deep as you are at either stupor stoop. I'd husband went over there and Brenneman bridges. Finish me up flied. Hey, got another great idea. Just, Seen William Powell picture, tell them you're also engaged to a moment allergy reservoir. Never believable. Me! Floyd as a tendency to carry things too far. They did help me see myself as I really am. I would make a good husband. I'm too fickle. Maybe floyds right? As much as hurts on, just have to tell him what a helium! And neither of them want me. Oh Hello. May I come in? I you show you walk comment. I'd like to. You'll find heavily on the Paul. You know the way. Oh Yeah. A long haul here. You come along too though. This concerns you had concerns all of us. I have a big confession to make. Mark! Nice to see back in town. I mean having Lena's told me all mad track malls and she has she said. Is All about lunch and what happened? Legends I one thing leads to another. either. How could tell Mash weet? Loker, Ashley wouldn't do anything behind. Add lines back to you know. Do. Admit that I did lose my ahead. When you swept me off my feet and that private dining room, you shouted show since the. Stamps share when he proposes outline. Certainly do. I singing love songs. When, he proposed to you. LEELA! He didn't think that night. In fact, he hardly. Headline Leila. How can you do this to be sorry, but this is a case where blood? Of and Waldo Water Commission, AH. It Into Shaef off markers that the only reason I came up. Here was to protect my dear little unprotected cussin'. May as well admitted them. That's what I came over here to tell you that I'm not gonna be trusted. I'm pickled. You Bet I'm where do you want to get just a heartbreaker? Thank, you can show many has. Just. How do you know that you're the only woman I'm engaged to? Where I can think of at least six other with. manicures to agencies traveling saleswoman walks. He mentioned the Lady Cop in California. gurls save yourselves. Break the engagement both of them. I'm just a GIGOLO. Adam Kehl withstand engaged. We are landline why you'll need me to you from all those women. My goodness. Oh? Thank you pretty. But you uncovered shot I didn't know you. You. You? Love Bowl Dashing Yankees. Stay engaged to you to. You. Now hours engaged to him long before you ever showing I. Don't care you just hot on back to Savannah. Will? Take Your House out soon. Be Moving over more. Unstinting. Women. And Bowel, the names of the end of nineteen forty eight four door Ford sedans in the third week park as big series of fifty thousand dollar contests Mrs Ben Rasmussen of Waukesha Wisconsin. Mrs Clara Bryant appeal box five three four with Trumka Oklahoma Dorothy El-Magharia of Cleveland Ohio Miss, IRA and fair of Cambridge. Massachusetts congratulations to all of you one hundred forty winners. Winners of other prizes we'll be notified by mail. Remember brees the fifth weeks. Contest is the final one. Yes, and it closes for good this Saturday. It's now or never want a nineteen forty nine four door Ford Sedan. Step up your opportunities to win by sending several entries above all. Send them now. This is the last time we can announce this contest. Mr Brother Sleep. On the phone? Thanks. Below Floyd Commissioner. Gildersleeve what kind of. With. I kinda word. Nothing happens how count? That was just a little reminder Mr! Nothing to do with it to keep your advice about women yourself. Goodnight folks talk. Here's an crap hasn't been able to make the right mouse then way back in nineteen forty one now at long last fast has plenty of a natural American cheese for you. The mellow golden wheels dealers cut in wedges since before the war, the need for cheese has been so great that it was difficult to set aside enough for curing justice past year, kraft could send plenty of fine cheddars, securing rooms God at for months and months. Now there's reward treat is back. Ask Your dealer for a wedge of the Mellow. Graham, eating natural cheese age so carefully for you by the master cheesemakers of crap. This is NBC. The National Broadcasting Company.
75. #Hired: Just Go for It
"Welcome back to Hashtag hired this Hashtag hired episode stars Leila who finally found her place in the remote workspace as the head of graphic design for. Apparel. Welcome to the HASHTAG. Hired many sewed. Week. We're sharing you're. Tired. Success Stories. My name is. I heard about vert vert force through some spouse military spouse friends here in Jacksonville Florida I wanted to connect more with people like me someone who? Stays at home I have a husband deploys. But I really wanted to look for remote work. Vert forces helped me find a job where I can now practice my passion on a daily basis. I'm a graphic designer and I've been bouncing around for years trying to find a place where I can plant roots and I finally found it. I am now the head of graphic designs for GSI apparel. They are an apparel company out of California. and. The defy actually stands for go for it and it was really ironic that. I got on the Vert Force facebook page and just typed in graphic designer and the FAI. Post came up and I was like. I'm just going to go for it and I just happened to message the person who posted and I the next day asked me to do some tesla goes and ablaze I had an interview and I was hired. So it was crazy and I had no idea that Jeff I even stood for go for it when I saw the post so it was really ironic. but I am absolutely in love with this job. Designing in art is my passion and I had. To career field choices before finally settling on graphic design, I wouldn't have it any other way. Need help with your resume vert force has your back listen to our resume boot camp series, which covers episodes forty seven through sixty of this show play them in chronological order to build a winning resume tailored to the virtual job market. Resume Boot camp also offers a subscription based online course and private community learn how you can opt in to our live trainings and resume critiques at Bit Dot Lee, forward slash, VF hyphen. BC. This job is helping me live a dream come true right now. It's time for now but there's a lot of opportunity to grow. We're gaining a lot of clients right now things are getting really crazy and exciting. I absolutely loved the team. I work with were all military spouses stay home moms, blended families. You know we just had that crazy life to balance but we are stronger of women just make a big things happen. I. Love that. I have creative freedom with this job. It's not just a job where I am told what to do. This is how they want it done. They kind of just say, Hey, this is a project. So go go in. I get a lot of great feedback permits. So it's it's really nice to be able to do that because I worked for another job before hours just hey, this is what we have to do and you have to do it this way Kind of monotonous. So the company itself is growing so I would love to just keep growing. Growing, and learning with them I WANNA. Stay with Jeff I for a long time to come it feels nice to be able to settle into something and not keep bouncing around at jobs that fit at that time. It's really frustrating. Kinda live in this lifestyle and just feeling like you have to pick a job. To just whatever's going on in your life at dot time. So I've been looking for my place in the world for a while and being a freelancer. I was always looking for work that I can do from home. The last few years have been tough. So I spent a good a lot a good amount of time for something that would suit my needs as a stay at home mom also a step parent when you have that blended family. SUMMERTIMES OFF Your husband works you have you only have them in the summer and so it's really nice to be able to stay home with all the kids are holidays and things like that. So I. Guess. My. And encouragement for people who are still looking is just he booking don't give up believe in yourself. it's really hard for us as spouses military spouses especially. To find light to feeling were. It's hard for us to feel like we're good enough. That we can succeed that we can balance it all and he kind of feel like you're being judged by everyone around you and So I've struggled struggled with that for a long time I. Finally, I just started reading some really good motivational books listening to podcasts and just Kinda keep chugging along. That's helped me start believing in myself again and I just went for it so. Just, go for it. You know the five model. Is just go for it. So what are you going to lose I? Guarantee you Yoyo only gained from it. So just keep going. That's my advice. A note for Leela. Leela I can totally relate to the ever changing lifestyle of the military spouse. The first step to owning that challenge is recognizing it. We're proud of your commitment to your blended family and your career. Keep up the good work. All BURP force that is it for this episode if you liked what you heard, please subscribe radar podcast and leave us a review. We really love hearing from. You know if you need to find the show notes which include all of the resources we discussed in this episode, you can find those at firt force that you. Guys I'm serious when I say we want to hear from you if you have an idea for an episode or question, email us at support at force dot us. As reminder, all content associated with the vert force podcast is the intellectual property of force LLC. I write catchy next week.
Supporting An Anxious Spouse (with Leila Lopes)
"How's it going guys? Welcome back to the DAD. Tired podcast. I'm your host Lopes. Join me every Monday as we dive into what it looks like to be men who fall in love with Jesus and help our families do the same. You can learn more about our books. Resources conferences and even online community going to dad tire dot com. Let's dive into today's episode. All right guys. We'll welcome back to the dead tired podcast in What is arguably the craziest week that we have ever had since the start of this show running on over four years now doing this show and I can say without a doubt that this week is the craziest week that we've ever had Today I've got my beautiful bride. Leyla hanging out with me. Hey good how are you doing well Today we're GONNA be talking about how to support an anxious spouse so lila's GonNa really help me walk through anxiety Okay we'll do that later. That was probably too soon to make that kind of joke But we'll dive into how to support an anxious spouse today. I'm excited to get into that. Obviously we will have a lot to talk about in the midst of this crazy news week but I think the stuff they were. GonNa talk about today will apply to you regardless of the week that you're listening For those of you. Who may be listening to this years later? we're talking specifically about the all the news around the corona virus. That really has come out in major ways this week. There's been some major shifts in the news this last week but so anyway a lot of Thoughts and chaos. A lot of people feel an anxious. Lot of husbands and wives shouldn't have support they're anxious spouse and so that's what we're going to talk about today but before we dive into that. I do WANNA think my friends over at the Christian Standard Bible for sponsoring today's episode They've got all kinds of great bibles but one of the bibles that I want to tell you about Is Their legacy note. Taking Bible this Bible Bible. This thing is obviously Guys can't see this but this Bible is one. It's huge and awesome It's made of actual leather. And it's a note taking Bible and the have at the very beginning of this Bible Places where you can do like Family Trees Births of people deaths in the family. Essentially what it is is it's meant to be passed down to like kids. It isn't it really is cool. And it's meant to be passed down for generations and generations. So what I love about it particularly in seasons like this is you can actually as you're reading through the scriptures. Take a bunch of notes because they have big margins on each side so you can take notes And of the things you could just like process the things that you're feeling in wrestling through in seasons like this that can be kind of high anxiety or just a little bit chaos. Whatever you're feeling you can process that in the Bible and you pass that down to your kids and grandkids and You know one hundred years from now they could be reading about how you were processing your faith with the Lord in the midst of chaos which I think is really really cool so anyway again Christian. Standard Bible has lots of really great bibles but this legacy note taking Bible as awesome. You can get it anywhere or bibles or soul particularly places like Amazon Lifeway Barnes and noble Christian book again anywhere where they sell bibles you can grab this legacy note taking Bible from Christian Standard Bibles. Thank you guys for sponsoring this episode and again You always help out Our show by helping out our sponsors so go check out the legacy note taking Bible from Christian Standard Bible. All Right Mama. Yeah there's so much has me on today. Well in case you know somebody who may struggle with things. One of the funniest things funny is not the right word one of the things that. Leyla Nye the kind of the jokes that I make towards. Leyla on probably a daily basis. Is you start many sentences with. I just read that. I'm just worried that even doing that for like ten years. And you've said it a lot more since we've had kids yeah and then always worried about something. Yeah so as of today. The news changes like hourly literally as we were about to hit record for this podcast on one of the news channels was doing like a town hall You know all right. Let's get doctors together and give the latest information as of today which is what's the day-to-day. I don't have any Sunday. March Fifteenth Twenty Twenty as of today. the news is. I think every state except one state has has the krona virus a case of the Cronin. Yeah West Virginia. That's what they just said and I think they're up to about fifty. Something deaths is what I just heard Right before I hit record and UH. They've canceled all events over to fifty. I think every state in the country has done that which is just insane. Today we would normally be at church and be with our Church family. We will not be as you guys will not be Because nobody know church is over two fifty or getting together which just in crazy yesterday went to a store. We have a store here in Oregon called Fred. Meyer which is just my friend. I think other people call it kroger. Maybe a Gr- I think your kroger is part of the R. Fred Myers part of the Cobra family. people like my friends from California. Make Fun of me because you can get everything I Engagement Ring Tires and medicine anyway with their yesterday close. Yeah kind of a Super Walmart kind of store with their yesterday and try to get some food like every store in America right now. The shelves are empty and people are just in survival mode and I try to just get a few medicines. Like cough drops Allergy Medicine Ibuprofen and it got up to the cash register. The lady at the cash register was not super friendly which understandably. I'm sure she's gone through a lot of stress and last couple of days and Anyway she told me I could only pick three which is just crazy. We live in America. And she's like you can pick three medicines. Well I was like I asked jared when he got home. I'm like what the heck are you trying to buy like fifteen bottles of Ibuprofen? And he's like no. I was trying to buy one package. A cough drops. One IBUPROFEN one allergy medicine for our son and like you know one dayquil or something. And she had him put put back because You can only pick three pretty wild times. Subaru and the crazy thing is like a week ago. If you would said that that was going to happen we were like no. It's not that big of a deal. I think things shifted so quickly so anyway I guess my first question to you would be. How are you feeling in the midst of all this really quick shifting news And where the world's at As of March Fifteenth Two Thousand Twenty Well I think I joined probably most the people or hopefully most people that feel a bit unsettled You know this is a illegitimate pandemic. I work in the healthcare field. I'm an rn in a hospital and Probably one of the biggest Anxiety and do service during this time is not necessarily a a concern for our like immediate family Were not in the demographic that seems to be At highest risk for severe illness or death. I'm but I do worry about. I just have a lot of concerns for for the vulnerable populations Specifically my patients I work With cancer patients or on college patients in that demographic tends to be older And then a lot of them are also on chemotherapy which is An immuno compromised state. So I my worry is And the reason that we're home and we're really limiting our exposure to other people again. Not necessarily I'm worried that One of US will get this in die but That I could bring it with me to work and potentially Be a cause of death to somebody. That's a big deal The other part of this is Again not necessarily the disease itself but there's some really big ramifications of having this global pandemic and we've seen it in the stores and now there's this food scarcity and just like in any other country or in any in the animal kingdom when there's food scarcity people and slash animals get. I mean I want. I don't WanNA use the word dangerous. But they do because it's survival of the fittest and who's going to be the most aggressive to get their their needs met you know and if you're not You lose and so again. I worry about Maybe people with disabilities or the lower. You know people who can't just zip in a car and drive from store to store to try and find what they need. I'm there are people who can't do that. And that's just heartbreaking the elderly But I mean even us. I'm a mom and I want to protect my babies and if my baby needs you know that lasts can't formula or my baby needs diaper or you know people get people get very animal so anyway. Those kinds of things It's unsettling and then I think it's a scarcity issue and especially here in the states. We are not used to that. We want what we want and we get if not that day. The very next day it will be delivered on our porch and We are going to have to come to the realization that that may not be the case in the coming months and lastly one more thing is the lack of leaders if we don't blunt this curve Meaning if too many people get sick critically sick at one time we do not have the capacity to care for that many critically ill patients so That's why it really is imperative for the population. The people if you don't have to go out and about please don't For the state. And maybe not you. You might be fine. Your family may be okay but But if you bring that This virus into a vulnerable population and their enough of those that happen There may be people on a Gurney in a hallway that Anyway it just could not go. Well for quite a few people so yeah so obviously. That's we're hearing a lot of that that kind of thing on the news and stuff alarmists like I feel. I really feel quite calm but I also feel is just kind of a moral obligation at this point to just do what you can The experts the doctors the epidemiologists the infectious disease Researchers are saying please Don't go out so we should heed that warning and not go out. This isn't about Jess you at this point. So there's a you know. We had the data cruise scheduled for next week and we had to cancel that a lot. Some of you. Who are listening to that. We're scheduled to be on that cruise and just can't apologize enough obvious. Oh Sad right where they've been talking about this for a year and a half so he was like he's like me just show up and then we could get on the boat. And but no I was committed to like the last second to try to make this work and then they actually canceled all cruises and Anyway so it's A. It's just a bummer just as an FYI I Were hoping to Redo that crews are postpone it until Into next April. So if you wanted to go on that and things pass and it's safe to get on cruises we'd love to have. We'll talk more about that later but anyway says we're hearing this news on the news Some guys and some of my friends are in the SPO. People are just all over the map as far as what they feel. Kind of all over the spectrum Some guys are going to hear that and their wives are going to have the same kind of concerns that you just laid out there and this is the facts. This is these are the realities and maybe that causes high anxiety. I posted on Instagram Just like this poll. Where you at like. What are you feeling a lot of people stress that they're feeling really high anxiety other people are like just don't care at all People are blowing it out of proportion. I guess if somebody is listening and they're like they're either the husband or wife who's got the high anxiety and the spouses like you're blowing this way out of proportion. You just need a calm down. Maybe they're saying that or they're feeling that I asked you to put together like three. Things are three ways that a spouse can support someone who might be feeling anxious in anxious time again whether that's the krona thing that's happening right now this week or maybe just in general they have high anxiety and we'll just preface this by saying. I'm usually the more optimistic slash careless. Okay rack last. Okay getting You know I don't. I don't typically things I eighty as much as I am. Yeah thank you so directly so I wish podcast capture. All the eye rolls happening in this room right now. Yeah so it for me. I just say this for the corona specifically the disease. I'm with you like the disease I you know. I'm not necessarily afraid that we are personally going to get sick. Just based on the facts. It seems like we're not in that demographic I don't want to contribute to other people getting sick so that's why we're not That's why we originally canceled the cruising before cruise lines did and. That's why we're not GONNA go on vacation when we have vacation time. We'll be in our house with our kids during the next few just to serve and love on the vulnerable population even if it doesn't directly affect us so we want to be Christ followers in that way But like you. I was at the store yesterday and I saw some people. I could just see people's eyes that animalistic survival mode you just feel it in the stores and and so that part does worry me so I think I I do have more like I guessing or stress about the situation that I normally would towards a situation because of like the ramifications that it's having but anyway in a in a situation where I wouldn't normally have Anxiety towards something. What are three ways that I can support you? What a through as a husband or wife can support their spouse who might be feeling high levels of anxiety during this time to get some thoughts for us. Yeah I thought of a couple of things And again this is not just regarding this global pandemic disease outbreak although this is a great time and a good example of maybe a highly anxious time but this. I think these would be good just anytime. I've certainly Struggled a bit with anxiety. My probably my whole life and in various seasons it's worse than other times and Sometimes reasonable and sometimes it's just not But one thing I thought that's helpful or at least mitigates the the tension between spouse. That's anxious and the spouse. Let's not as Having the not anxious spouse Just acknowledge the feelings You know acknowledged the feelings of their spouse so Not necessarily supporting or you know acknowledging the cause of the anxiety like if you know if I have this Fear of I dunno going swimming in a lake and a shark is gonNA come and eat me and I have like high. I mean because some people have some really unreasonable. There are no sharks and lakes. I mean but some people just have really unreasonable causes of anxiety. You use an example purpose. That was unreasonable. Like a shark in a lake. Yes okay yes okay. Did you think that I thought maybe sharks were in lakes? No that's what I'm saying. So I'm saying like I want you if somebody has an unreasonable unreasonable fear like I'm afraid that a shark is gonna come eat me and that's why. I'm not going to swim in the lake with my family. Then like you don't have to necessarily be like yes that's true dear. You know that is the scary thing that could happen. No I mean it's not But that does not mean that the anxiety isn't there or the fear isn't there so what I'm saying is you don't necessarily have to acknowledge the cause of the anxiety as legitimate But the feelings are the anxiety is real In the other side is just that there's really nothing worse than having that Anxiety or that fear of being anxious and scared and then also feeling totally alone in that or Or to be made to feel kinda crazy or judged by especially by your spouse So get just acknowledging instead of you know making fun of a rolling. Your eyes or being annoyed by The anxiety but just like acknowledging yes you have anxiety and like I acknowledge that. And that's a real feeling. That's a legitimate feeling you can't dictate to somebody else. What they should or shouldn't or can or can't feel do or don't feel yes so just for some context here Leyla. I don't know these three things. That late US put on so on her list so Some of it. I will take on like taking personally in a good way. Like I'm just hearing. Is Layla feel? And what do I need to receive the? I'm trying to think of stuff outside the krona virus. I it probably started at the beginning of this from like Babe. Calm down like we're we can do things and So I guess what I'm hearing you say is you. Don't I'm trying to think of examples like maybe we take the kids to the Skate Park? And you're just terrified that they're going to go down this ramp and breaking arm constantly like that. Yeah I'm just I don't want them to do XYZ because XYZ could happen And so oh okay so a good one is around water and swimming. I have high anxiety around water flood water especially the kids and And for me. That is a legitimate reason to have concern children. Drown all the time and What I don't like hearing and what makes me want to like not allow you to bring the children to a pool is if I feel that you don't legitimize that fear like if you if you've just because you're anxious like I am about drowning if I feel that You haven't legitimized that That it really worsens or if you for example one time he wanted to take. Alisha camping our son or eight year old son. I think he was seven at the time and I had a huge list of things to be aware of. And you know and And some of it I was probably over the top and maybe silly but I needed. Jared like acknowledge. Okay Leila's feeling anxious about this trip. I'm going to legitimize those feelings. And you know here are the things I'm GonNa do to like. Make sure Elisha safe or something. 'cause it's fine we're going then. All bets are off. I don't trust you yes. So let's help me walk through that because I think this is GonNa be like a very normal dads are going to. I'm generalizing here. I know that there are data struggle things anxiety and wives. Who Don't so. I'm talking about just our situation here so in our particular situation helped me. I'm trying to think through what I could actually say or do in that moment. Let's use the camping trip for example In that moment that would have made you feel like you know some of the stuff. It felt me. I'm trying to think through. Maybe not it didn't just didn't feel logical to me so I'm trying to stick with that first point that you said like our kids are to die of third degree sunburn if I don't laugh at them up with sixteen layers of sunburn are sunscreen before they go out on the Kayak Sunscreen could cause cancer too because the chemical the safe and clean sunscreen. I know it never ends. It never ends. But it's exhausting for me. Yeah I'm to be that way. I'm not trying to think of all the ways some harm could come to us or our children or whatever but This actually leads to the second thing on my list. Befor before we go there what what could I have said? In that moment that would have made you would have made you feel like all right George loving me. Well here Okay so for just talking about legitimizing my feelings. I think just saying that. Just say you know I know it's nerve racking for you that the kids are out of your sight and they're with me I you know just. I don't know I acknowledge that. That's kind of a scary feeling and out of control feeling but I love them just as much as you do and I'm going to take really good care of them or some sort of -nology instead of eye rolling Yeah don't roll me and like act like it's not possible because those things are you said shark in the lake which is not possible. Okay so okay so if somebody has a fear that okay. So here's one that's personal because I don't have fears of sharks in lakes that are gonna come eat me But one that I struggled with for really long time that you can tell you already. GonNa Laugh at me again just because you're smiling. Well okay I have a fear of being shot turn okay. I know that that's probably not a reasonable fear. Maybe are you part of gang? No I'm not part of a gang Unless you count homeschool MOMS. They're usually not pack in. But it would be to the point where I would be like driving up. I five interstate five to get home or to go to work or whatever and then there's like a car driving next to me and I'm thinking why aren't they passing me or letting me pass. I feel like they're kind of driving at the same speed. I am and I'm GONNA look over and they're going to have a gun pointed at me now. I know that's silly and I know there's no reason why somebody would just pull out a gun and shooting on. I go rhino home from work or going to work. We live in the Pacific. Northwest Rabin's ache in Oregon. Throw some Tofu or something. I'm not in other places of the nation that have very hike where I grew up which is kind of why laughed because where I grew up. That's illegitimate that legitimately people are getting shot. But anyway so like things like that and and I still don't need you to make fun and I'm pretty playful and I can. I don't take myself too seriously but but I would how I would like actually tense up on that side that the car was driving past me and I would get kind of chosen my body and I would you know hunch my shoulder up like somehow to protect myself from a bullet. I don't know So even though I even can acknowledge it's probably not a legitimate Ang's anxiety I still have the feelings and for some people. They're not able to kind of talk themselves out of it like debilitating debilitating. And that's when you get like the AGORAPHOBIA. People legitimately won't leave their house because the fears or somebody. That's not as smart as you. Gore phobia agoraphobia. Is kind of like a leather way? I'm not as smart as you. That's why I was not for somebody else. I mean my have to Google it to find the official definition but it's essentially like the fear of like everything like it's severe and debilitating anxiety of all the things so on the people that suffer from this and so much of it is not legitimate. They're not the things that they're afraid of are likely not really dangerous but it feels that way. Their body is still responding in that fight or flight. And why would you leave your house? If everything out there is causing that reaction. It's absolutely miserable. Yeah so the so the for me. I guess what I'm picking up here in this. First one is the statistical data to show that. You're going to get shot on. The freeway is really low and unlikely. But what you're feeling is real and my heart rate was still pounding and my shoulder was still tensing up and I was not going to look over to my right because I was certain I could see it clear as day in my head that this person it ends up being like some sweet old lead. Just like doesn't pay attention that we're rolling roadblock and she's just driving right next to me you know. Sometimes I try and make myself. Leyla just look just looked your rights. You can see that. There's not a gun intas. It's I know it's silly. The feelings are still in my body like I'm still actually having a physiological response to a fear this reminds me that our daughter the other day the Stream What was the dream? I CAN'T REMEMBER? It was something very silly. Oh it was. She had a dream that she was at the cafeteria at school in her pizza. Sat up on her plate and talk to her and what she's telling the dream. We're both in the kitchen together. And she's telling us the straight kind of smiling and giggling like. I think this is really funny and you caught on because you're much better at me like she's getting work done. This is really causing her of stress distress and so she is well tears and you just walked over and hugged her and she just kind of started crying arms and all that together. She's telling us this thing that really spooked her so I just held her and she melted and cried. That's a good example. I think of like okay. Obviously the pizza talking off your plate is totally silly. And but what you're feeling is real and it's causing real emotions and hopefully as husbands to love our wife's well we can empathize with that and say like That sucks that you're feeling in my heart. Broke for her. Like this sucks. I don't WanNa see my baby girl. You know cry. You know for anything especially something like this so I think that's a good example of just like how do we love our swell? Who's dealing with that even if we feel like what they're struggling with is not legitimate. What they're feeling is legitimate and for me to say Babe we both can. Maybe acknowledge that. That's kind of silly or not. Maybe silly might not be right where US. But this is unlikely. It's unlikely say you know silly fear to me. I'M NOT GONNA get upset but you know your spouse in the way that they may be better able to receive You know be able to speak about this. Yeah it's unlikely that this is GonNa Happen but I'm sorry what you're feeling. I can tell it's really bothering you and I hear you let me know if there's something I can do to whatever it for some it might just be. I'm going to stand next to you like you did with Eden. I'M GONNA RUB your back. I'm GonNa give you a hug. Get let you be a shoulder to just kind of melt into our what's number two So the next thing and like I said it kind of Was tied back into the first but One of the biggest trigger is I would imagine for. Probably most people and certainly me is Change or and or in these go hand-in-hand but just like kind of that sense of being out of control like I'm not in control of something and when you have anxieties or fears you can It helps I think too like like for example. When you went camping with Elijah I wanted to name all of the things I could potentially go wrong and my recommendation for what you would do if those things happened. You know like please. Don't forget water shoes because X Y and Z could be in the water or he could step on this when he's campy and please make sure that you know what if he gets stung by being. He's allergic and we didn't know and I mean just on and on and on so change and being out of control is a big trigger And and maybe guys have picked up on this. And we've talked about this before. But jared is always. He always has big ideas. New Ideas Whole new trajectories for our entire lives all the time he comes up with things that would just change the course of our lives like nothing and for me. That's like that spins my head you know and I So anyway it would help. I think my anxiety. If when you have something you want to present to me that you know maybe a bit of a trigger like this is going to be a big change for us or this is going to maybe You know this is something new idea I thought of this is what I want. Implemented her family or something is showing me that you've thought about it you know more than normally would Because you know that I will be thinking about all the things because I tend to think through All of the things that could go wrong or why? This might not work or and that those are the things that causes me anxiety so if my I guess it would kind of help lessen my anxiety. If I know that you've thought through Maybe a change that you want to implement in our family when I I appreciate that Ben what I When I hear from that and argus what I take away from that as a guy who does I do? I really do what. Leyla Sane is true And so I guess my take away from that is What am I doing to contribute to your anxiety and so there are guys who may be frustrated or may be growing bitter towards their wives anxiety. I'm frustrated that you're anxious about this thing because you felt that he feels frustrated by anxiety. Because it's like he calls me the queen of the wet blankets. I just throw wet blanket on everything he comes up with and it may be out of my fear anxiety and then he gets frustrated or bitter toward me and so I guess one thing that I will take away from that. And hopefully the spouse listening is Are there things that I'm contributing to? To the relationship that are actually causing anxiety in the spouse And then I'm getting better at them for that anxiety so watch. How do I protect my wife? Well is for me to think through Protecting her is really choosing the words and the thoughts and the ideas that I throw out to her And just really thinking that through ahead of time and thinking is this GonNa give some. Is this something that's life-giving for me as it actually GonNa be anxiety inducing for her and so if I really want to protect her and her heart and her emotions really thinking through. Is this the best idea to share right now with her? Maybe that idea can better be shared with another friend. Who also gets joy through just spitballing ideas and we both get life. Giving you know fuel by sharing new stuff. Or maybe it's just Let me hang onto that idea for forty eight hours before I share Because likely it'll go away knowing most of my ideas ninety five percent of come and go so maybe some of them some of you listeners. Like are like jared where you just want to talk about ideas. Maybe not necessarily implement them. But you just want to share this grand idea and this whole like layout life that you have envisioned and because my God I just worry that the resentment My worry is that you will resent me for not being able to share your dreams and we've had talks like this where it's been like a mutual resentment like I've been frustrated with jared. Will this resentment that he just all the time? New IDEAS CHANGE OUR LIVES. Do this instead. Actually I know last week I wanted to this with our lives but now this week I want to do this and I just start getting like frustrated and fearful that like what is he doing and But it goes the same way I worry that he gets. You know like you said kind of resentful and resentment is the worst zoo is. It's such a bitter root. That could like throats is v. spreads quick and it's invasive and it kills things horrible. It just changes your thoughts towards your spouse and so You really really really have to get good at communicating Be The good communicator. But also the person that has to hear. Heart things like for Jared Itami. Leyla when you shut down everything it really is hurtful and I get bitter toward you and you know and I have to then receive that in a way. That's like okay. Do I do that. Well shoot I. Do you know just you have to be okay and it just constructive. Not Critic man. Critics are so hard to criticism is the worst. Also there's constructive criticism in a loving way and then there's just like you know being mean And so there are ways to communicate that are meant to Jab and hurt and then there are ways to communicate that you really are doing it to better your relationship and so in anxiety just can make all of that really difficult but as the receiver of of that constructive criticism and as the giver. You have to be careful but do it. You have to do it. I think the key is what you said. Is the the heartbeat behind the criticism? Is that I want best for you and a want best for us. And if you can structure your sentences and your thoughts that way like Sometimes the thoughts feel like. I just don't want to have what you WANNA have. Yeah I'm just. I'm thrown wet blanket. 'cause I WANNA be a wet blanket and I think your ideas dumb. That's the way it can feel as opposed to something. You've done this before. I wrote a chapter on this in the book where I said I was about to buy a Harley Davidson remember. Remember that and I was just like Layla was like shopping at the mall. And I walked over the Harley Davidson store for those of you who haven't read the book. You should get the book by the way it's on audio book or while you've got some time But anyway I found myself at Harley dealership and I'm about to buy a Harley and literally. I'm like trying on jackets because they're like if you buy hardly today. You get a free jacket even with skype Guy. So my Gosh pray for me. I've never read the motorcycle in my life literally have never ridden a motorcycle my life but I had already done the credit check of. He's like we. I got approved. Like what the heck does that matter? Doesn't mean you should get a motorcycle anyway so I'm trying on the jacket. Leyla walks in. She's like what is going on. I'm like hey babe just just got a motorcycle and Dave over here on me a motorcycle. What But one thing you said there was like you reminded me of our bigger goal like like instead of just being like. You're an absolute idiot. What are you doing you were like? Hey we're trying to like get out of dad and we can do that using the money for this kind of thing. Our goals for family. So I guess just approaching your spouse let us let me remind you of. We're actually trying to do as a family. Even in the midst of this big idea So yeah change. I think that's helpful for a spouse to really hear like all right. We change or out of control how to control. People are okay not being in complete control and for some people. It causes a lot of anxiety so just coming up with ways to like. Help your spouse feel either feel a little bit more in control or just sharing that you thought something through and you you know you have answers for some of the worries. I think some practically like this week for people who are listening tomorrow or you know if you're listening on Monday the sixteenth and the Krona virus stuff is enduring the still were still in the thick of that as you're listening to this Maybe you have a spouse who's really anxious about this whole thing and you've been downplaying it and you still don't feel like it's that big of a deal one way that you maybe could love is stop by the grocery store grab a few extra things Hebei by notices important to you. I grabbed seventeen thousand cases of water and toilet paper and no You know I picked up some extra groceries. And here's some ways that maybe that just helps contribute to that like out of Control Fiat if if if feeling out of control is what's causing some anxiety for your spouse. Maybe some way that you can help us to offer them and again. I really want to emphasize the point for the guys and women who are listening. Are there things that you are currently doing? That are contributing to the spout. To to see that your spouse is feeling and to really say one of the ways that I'm going to die to myself and protect my spouse's heart is to limit the things that I say or do that might cause anxiety for them. That's a point Speaking of The fact that most of us are going to be stuck in the house for the next couple of weeks do want to take the time to thank. My friends were blinking for also. Sponsoring this episode. If you haven't heard of linkage actually was just talking to some guys at one of the conferences recently and you're asking me a little bit more about blankets. Blankets is essentially an APP. That you can get on your computer or your phone. Your tablet that allows you to take Download books and you get the best key takeaways the need to know information from thousands of nonfiction books and it will condense it down to just fifteen minutes that you can either read or listen to. This is a really really good way one. 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All the books you want and all for one low price right now for a limited time blinking has a special offer just for you. Our audience go to blink dot com slash tired. Try It for free for seven days and save twenty five percents off your subscription. That's blink is spelled B. L. I. N. K. I S. T. blankets dot com slash tire. To Start Your free seven-day trial you'll also receive twenty five percent off at only when you sign up at LINKAKC DOT com forward slash. Tired are bay. What was the third thought you had for US spouses that can support an anxious spill Lastly sometimes being anxious And having anxiety can Literally have no trigger. Where at least what feels like? It's come from nowhere so I can find myself feeling anxious For like I said it just feels like no good reason and I become pretty irritable and grumpy and just overall overwhelmed So the littlest thing When my anxieties high the littlest thing I'm just like Oh you know I'm just here to bowl and grumpy and uncomfortable. I don't know I've I think I've tried to explain to you. Weddings feels like this. The word keeps coming is like uncomfortable uncomfortable in my body. I'm uncomfortable in my brain. My I'm like actually having physical feelings as just uncomfortable And so part of that is just go ahead. I'm sorry to interrupt. You are definitely when you finish. That thought just was interesting. I've talked to some friends about this even recently and how Anxiety and stress manifests itself. Physically it so huge go ahead actual feet like physical feelings sometimes so Part of that part of our physiology is our vegas nerve which is part of our autonomic nervous system and that plays a huge role in I'm mental health innings ID and depression In the the nerve regulates critical functions and our body like blood pressure. Our heart rate are digestion Sweating and so when you have anxiety Those things can manifest physically. It's uncomfortable to have your heart rate pounding When you're not physically exerting yourself when you're just sitting there and your heart is pounding and your breaths are like rapid and shallow. It's it really is uncomfortable. nausea is another. One again with the digestion. stomach pains But you can simulate this nerve so what I was thinking is Well let me start over so you can. You can simulate this nerve by taking Really deep breaths like slowing like overriding. Those physical manifestations I'm taking some breasts and other various like relaxation techniques So again the best and easiest way I think is deep breathing So one thing that a spouse could do for their anxious spouses just allowing that time Again if I'm just feeling overwhelmed you can tell. I'm feeling overwhelmed. And I'm having anxiety and I'm just uncomfortable and I'm irritable like allow me to go go into the room and maybe turn on my essential oils diffuser and Just kind of be by myself for a minute to give that time to like physically reset my body you can. You can stimulate that nerve by deep breathing so allowing your spouse time to do that. I've lost practical way. That is practical and I have a lot of thoughts on that Couple of them are. What I would have spouse? Shouldn't do is say. Just calm down. That okay cool. Thanks didn't think of that. Why didn't I think about just calming down? Throw something at your head instead of just saying you know just calm down actually giving them the freedom even even set it up as much as you can't like. Hey Babe I'll take the kids go up to the room for a little bit and just say rely. What do I say? Relax enjoy. Enjoy some me time. Yeah they're sorry but they're I've noticed that in school. They're really teaching children to. That's IT'S A. It's a real way to like self-regulating taking you know we've had our kids. Tell us that they've learned at school. I need to take some deep breaths and so I always tell my patients to in through your nose out through your mouth like you're smelling of flour and blow out a candle and it really it physically changes. What's happening there science behind that? That's not just like you know food. What sort I'm looking. We'll we'll we'll which is by the way what I've always thought of Essential oils snake oil over here in a bottle but if it smells good and it's not poisoning our bodies like candles and incense and let me have my we will. Oil Diffusing has good loan. Leila's Smart Okay. So for any wives that are listening Leyla smarter than I am. I'm not trying to cure cancer with essential oils or anything like that but I do like the smell and there are mental health benefits and even some anti microbial properties to some of these oils. Let me have it not unreasonable. Leyla does lottery. Search the stuff more than I ever would. So Future We probably shouldn't say somebody cut this out. But after every episode we always have so many people try to reach out to social media like try to be your friend and Layla. It's not that she doesn't want to be friends with everyone. But you just like all you do is post pictures of our kids off the Internet. I have two week. It's my anxiety. I don't know who you are so I'm assuming you're somebody tried to fishing. You still my children or some. I really only post pictures of my kids. And that might like friends and family can see and the only reason. I say that is because you. Do you have geeked out on the essential oil thing so. I was just going to say for the wives that are like you know what do I get? What can diffuse. That's helped your anxiety. Can you help me? So I'm just GonNa how I think Maybe we'll have to put some together and you can shoot. If he wanted to know about it you can hello and in some hello tire. Dot Com thank. Let's do this. Leyla Dad Tire Dot COM L. E. I L. A. That's not gonNA work. Nobody's spell your name right. Ellie I. La You think we should do it. Leyland spelled it out okay. Leyla at DAD TIRE DOT COM. I'll setup setter neil dress up today email me. They're not kill safer. Leyla at dead tired. If you have questions or relate to Leyla on any of this and want to talk to her she can show reach. You can reach. Are there all right guys thank you? Do you have any last thoughts? Oh I just want to acknowledge that. Living with an anxious spouse is probably exhausting And so I personally have a hard time dealing I don't WanNa see dealing with that. Sounds kind of harsh but Interacting with people who are unreasonable or irrational. I actually personally have a low threshold for that and so when I feel like. I'm being unreasonable. Or Irrational I can acknowledge that that would be really exhausting. So yeah. How's this for a hypocritical As an anxious person if that's you and it's actually interrupting your daily living or your relationships and you really feel like you're not you don't have a handle on it or you're not leaving the house. I mean outside of this pandemic situation but in general like if leaving the house is hard for you. Anyway because of your overwhelming fears or anxieties No that that can be really hard for your spouse. Even though your feelings are real The spouse I imagined would have a hard time and so I'm as much as you need grace from your spouse regarding your anxiety Also consider just be aware that your spouse may need grace as they learn to handle and being you know being married to an anxious person And if your spouse just naturally a very good listener I want I would encourage the spouse to. Please try get better at that. I'm but also Therapy is a really. They have come up with some really great Therapy modalities and treatments for anxiety. So don't discount that it's doesn't mean you're broken or this is just part of life this side of heaven you guys and so For for till the end of time there are going to be people who have anxiety and we have to learn ways to help each other and be there for your spouse and in love if that means that maybe you need to seek. Help outside of your spouse then do that and there's no shame at all in that that's a good word Mama Thanks for hanging out with again wives if you WANNA get in touch with. Layla ELLIOTT LEYLA AT TIRE DOT COM. She'll potentially unless you get like thousands of emails but even pretty good getting back to people better than I am Anyway we love you guys Again just to kind of sum it up here with the corona virus thing like for most of you listening. This isn't GonNa Affect you or your family. As far as medically goes most likely Yeah there are people that have children. You almost don't don't just getting into the worry stuff here But let's prefer our neighbors and our community. Let's serve. Well get groceries for your neighbor if you know that they can't if you buy two extra things at the grocery store so you can give to somebody who might need it but let's be followers of. Jesus well in the season of chaos Anyway a lovey guys and wash your hands and we'll see you next week.
Holidays Week Morning Kids Choice (3-24-2020)
"It's time for Chompers your morning in nineteenth brushing. Show get your toothbrush ready and start brushing on the top of your mouth on one side and brushing little circles around each to three. It's holidays week and today we're ready to celebrate all the incredible and inventive holiday ideas. You guys sent get your dancing shoes on because PJ wants to celebrate dancing day a day where everyone dances until they get tired. Let's kind of the opposite of what Judah wants to do on his holiday Lazy Day on Lisi Day. You stay in your pajamas all day. Have breakfast in bed and don't leave the house. Gosh I don't know which one I want to do. War Switzer rushing to the other side of the top of your mouth and brush all the way to the molars in the back. Leila Isla and Yanni all want a day to celebrate UNICORNS actually Leila wants to celebrate meow Jaekle UNICORNS which are cat unicorns. We think wants a holiday called hatch day to celebrate the hatching eggs and Gillies. Holiday would be squirrel day when we celebrate things about squirrels. Like ACORNS Switzer rushing to the bottom of your mouth and brush the inside outside and chewing side each teeth. Some champions want these to celebrate their favorite hobbies. Adam would celebrate national video game history day a day to remember video games from the past. Rediscover them and learn how they were played. Henry would celebrate art day. Data make a lot of art and T- In would create book day for people to read and sell books. Teagan suspect you are probably a really good reader. Keep IT UP. Switzer rushing to the other side of the bottom of her mouth and keep on brushing pages idea is cup cake day. Everyone would be off of school or work and there would be cupcake. Parades wants to create a baking day. It would be on January twelfth and everyone would bake their favorite thing. Hey Nina page. Maybe you guys can get together and bake all the cupcakes for the cupcake parade and definitely be sure to invite us because you're sounds delicious shoppers today. A comeback tonight for more outstanding new holidays until then. Three tape chompers production of Gimblett media.
Holidays Week Morning Kids Choice
"Chompers is produced by Gimblett and sponsored by crest and oral B. It's time for chompers beer morning and nineteenth brushing show. Get your toothbrush. Ready and start brushing on the top of your mouth on one side and brushing little circles around each to three. It's holidays. We and today we're ready to celebrate. All the incredible and inventive holiday ideas. You guys sent? Get your dancing shoes on because PJ wants to celebrate dancing day a day where everyone dances until they get tired. Let's kind of the opposite of what Judah wants to do on his holiday. Lazy day on Lisi day. You stay in your pajamas. All day have breakfast in bed and don't leave the house. Gosh, I don't know. Which one I want to do more. Switzer rushing to the other side of the top of your mouth and brush all the way to the molars in the back. Leila Isla and Diani all want a day to celebrate unicorns. Actually Leila wants to celebrate meow Jaekle unicorns which are cat unicorns. We think. Emma wants a holiday called hatch day to celebrate the hatching of eggs and Killys holiday would be squirrel day when we celebrate things about squirrels. Mike acorns? Switzer rushing to the bottom of your mouth and brush the inside outside and chewing side each. Some champions want days to celebrate their favorite hobbies. Adam. Would celebrate national video game history day. Data remember video games from the past rediscover them. And learn how they were played Henry would celebrate art day a to make a lot of art and T in would create book day for people to read and so books Teagan suspect. You are probably a really good reader keep it up. Switzer rushing to the other side of the bottom of your mouth and sheep on brushing. Pages idea is Cup cake day, everyone would be off of school or work. And there would be cupcake parades. Meena wants to create a baking day, it would be on January twelfth and everyone would bake their favorite thing. Hey, Nina page, maybe you guys could get together and bake all the cupcakes for the cupcake parade and definitely be sure to invite us because your holiday sounds delicious. Chompers today, but comeback tonight for more outstanding new holidays until then three. Chompers a production of Gimblett media. Hey champions. Do you know what a world record is? It's when someone does something bigger longer better than anyone else in the world like when someone runs one hundred meters faster than anyone else or when someone builds the tallest toilet paper tower in thirty seconds. So our question for you is if you set the coolest and greatest world record your world record. What would it be tell your grown up and have them send us your answer at chompers dot dental? We might use your answer in an upcoming episode of chompers grownups that address again is chompers dot dental. Chompers is brought to you by crest and oral B grownups. It's April and flowers are starting to bloom it's a fresh start to a new season. It's also the perfect time for a fresh set of toothbrushes and toothpastes from crest and oral B with dentist recommended toothbrushes. It's easier than ever for your kids to sprout new habits and crest toothpastes come in flavors. Your kids will love like strawberry and bubblegum. Blooming smiles are always in season, thanks to crest and oral B.
Episode 496 - How to Scale the Human Impact of Growing Your Business - Leila Hormozi - CFR #496
"Welcome to click bottles radio where we go. Behind the scenes and uncovered the tactics and strategies. Top entrepreneurs are using to make more sales dominate their markets. And how you can get those same results. here's your host day woodward every welcome back. I am so excited to have my guests on his show. I've been trying to get layla her mosey on the show for months and due to her schedule my schedule and my messing things up. It's been a while. But i'm so excited. So they'll welcome to the show. Thanks dave say to be here so for some reason you don't know how you would know later but if for some reason you don't alleles the co founder and president of three different companies. Jim launch again. Her husband out. Alex mosey allen prestige. Labs is one of the most amazing you'll ever meet. I just honestly. I could go on for hours about just how you lilly. Contributing gift is so many people. I've had the to working with you. It dan martell sas academy. Obviously you are your very first award winner for our too hard awards. You guys have the most generous hearts in giving people in the world get so honored to have her show today. It's going to be a ton of fun so thanksgiving showing up. I appreciate that. So with this You're gonna get a kind of appropriate topics trying to find out. What would be the best thing. Layla has such a wealth of knowledge. So many different areas that kind of bounce through a couple of them. But i think right now as we're kind of going into this holiday season there's a lot going on. It's been a crazy crazier a lot of transitions for a lot of people. And i think the part that gets forgotten most right now and that is the human side of business and we're kind of dive in and talk a little bit about the personal growth element as a business owner leila runs three different businesses. So she understands exactly what's like transitioning and growing and scaling three again. These are small businesses. These are eight nine figure businesses so growing rapidly and so so excited to Really kind of it so they went that being said. I know when you you've had the opportunity of being the brains behind all of alex's businesses which is true and he'll give you credit but i think the part i i'm most impressively as we had the opportunity kind of watching from a distance here. I'm impressed just to see the way in which you deal with the people side and i know that if your mind kind of just dive in and kind of tell people just a little bit about how you managed growing and stealing from people. Side of things yeah. I think that it comes from different philosophies. And so i actually came from. The difference between our met was alex had owned businesses. Before and i had no right. I had like side gigs. During like solo stuff. I'd never really managed teams and so i came in very naive and very optimistic and honestly date i was just like i just love people like i want to be the best ever. I just want to treat everyone really well. And science fifteen per very different view out say many from the opposite But i feel like it actually put me at an advantage because i think that as you go through business what i see happen to a lot of people is that one in the beginning stage. The belief is often that they are the best at everything and they don't need a lot of people the second piece of that a growing insecurity of being needed less than less than the business And then the third piece is that people just become dispensable a to a sense because people get burned so many times By there's things that just happen as you have. Teammates there's lawsuits. There's a arguments people especially like in the world we live in. Now they take your product. They rip it off. They make their own company. So there's so many things that happen. I feel like it just wears on people And i think that for me. What i realized through it all is that the only way in is this comes with a concept of thinking. I think a lot of people think that strategy trump's team right like you the best strategy ever that means it doesn't really matter what's going on with your team and i think it's the reverse which is like you want to have people that build a wonderful strategy and without people then you cannot even execute on the strategy right where you can't execute. Well then. I think that so many entrepreneurs come in and they think that strategy is everything. But i can tell you. I mean mostly off the street. I'm sure you know to. They have like a phenomenal idea. Making happen as a whole other thing and if you really want people to make your idea happened than they have to actually like you and be investment use. The entrepreneur has the leader and the only way to get people to like it. Invest in you is if you like it invest matt. How ironic right. So i think you know. My philosophy has always just been trust. I with people with clients with teammates. It's always trust i. I'm going to give more of myself. i'm give more trust. I'm gonna give more transparency more honesty and until you break it. I am going to continue to extend it. And so that's why i've always come from the way i look at. It is my goal. I have a model in my mind which is a sharp mind kind heart. That's the kind of boss. I wanna be. That's the kind of leader. Wanna be for the team. And the reason i picked that is because i think that Many people think that if you are soft or you have you focus on people skills and he focus on people that you lose your heart edge or you're not strategic on you know whatever and i think that if there's one thing i think i've focused on. Its finding balance is i see so much extreme. I think either extreme honestly kills a business either by letting your employees run the business and you don't run it you don't even steer the ship you essentially. Let them do. So there's a reason that one person the ship Or the opposite way which is everyone's so terrified view or There's they have such a haste about you because of anger mood or just distaste for them that than they just all. We are having to go to work for you to doing a love that i know that As i take a look at just kind of the the gym launch life cycle. You guys got the opportunity of of building and bring that thing down a couple of times but the fun part for me in seeing that goes back to what you were just talking about in. That is the human side. And i'm kind of curious as you start. We've conversations with regard to some of the most amazing people that you brought onto your team and how finding the right person literally changes the entire dynamics of your team. I know you've spoken very highly your cfo and others. You start to actually go out and to build a team. what is when. When did you first start. Some of these people are listening. They is just them in. They're going. How do i actually make my first hire. Who should i hire. Be or. I've already got a bunch of employees. What's the right thing. what's the next. How do you find out what the right hire. Right i think in the beginning A lot of people tend to to do one of two things which is one they wanna get out of the pain too quickly. They hire too soon and too soon. Means you don't have consistency right. There's not consistent demand for the business or maybe there's consistent demand but you have not seen out the delivery so you don't know if there's consistent stick on the back right and i think that you have to be able to see a full cycle of a certain amount of clients through maybe six months. Maybe it's twelve months And i think it's yeah the minimal viable that could be in a couple part time people and then you look at as long as the product. There's demand for the product it's a growing market. And you now know that you have something that you don't even need to know scalable right now right but it works right. It gets fine for the keeps class. And i think it's time to look out. What are the worst uses of your time. The the worse that hate doing that someone else would probably be extremely excited to do. That's when i think of the first higher. So i remember us. It was You know were building launching. You're probably about four and a half munson and we had one assistant and i said goodness gracious. Layla technical support like i am. I'm doing it but i'm horrible In so that was. The first thing that i outsource was actually the technical support. We have for our clients over there and the second thing was financed because I would say this is a limiting belief of mine but my brain just doesn't work like his when it comes to numbers and doing math and spreadsheets. And so i was like. I'm going to get someone in here to the counting booking bookkeeping as soon as possible. I think a lot of times. It's the things that are the lowest use of your time or lowest value in terms of your time that you could easily find someone else to do nowadays. I mean you know. There's so many sources. I think that so many people out there. He can get the work for three dollars an hour. I mean and it could be great work and so people also just don't know the possibilities that are out right now with the amount of remote work there is in the world. I mean you can get someone to do those kind of jobs for just really cheap and it makes a huge difference in their life because of where they live. That's a substantial income. I love that. I'm kind of curious. I look at where you first started as salesperson out there selling to now the president of a soon to be hundred million dollar empire here tell me what. How do you grow through. That has been over four years now. Five years yeah five. I think five now so you've gone from startup to crazy crazy numbers and you as a person. Have you gone through that growth because you went from again selling now to managing very large team on three different companies. Yeah i think that a lot of it was really leaning into the pain I think that. I realized very quickly in the beginning that if i didn't lean into the things that were painful didn't solve those faster than i solved the things that were not as painful than i wouldn't grow. And my greatest. Fear was that if i'm being super transparent that i would be the bottleneck to the business because i had worked for a lot of entrepreneurs before and i had seen them like their businesses worked for one prior. Who you so good at what he did and i watched him every day just kept himself and killed me. I was like man. I would never do that if i wanted to. Business and so for me. It was committed to growth and commitment to being to fulfilling my potentials because i also knew that and i know that if i don't continue to grow than those below me don't and higher growth oriented people and so that means quick so you know in the beginning. It's out of you know. In order to grow you have to seek out the pain right. Pain is just a sounding alarm. Show you where you have to fix something. You should pay attention to this over here And then as you continue to grow. It's the real is that if you don't nobody does and that is detrimental to an organization and so there are many times when i also may not feel like i want to take that next step but those below me might want to and so it's time for me to take it so that they can Which happens through. Belichick where i'm like. Okay i get it out of your way. Like i'm for me to step up a little and i think that's really in that it's just an aggressive pursuit of growth and growth means discomfort on a basis. You know it means. Having a conversation hands are sweating doing the stuff that i think. If you don't learn how to manage it keeps you up at night I think just. Learning to mitigate that and i think in england. It's listening to this. It's such a privilege if you get to do that right. Like the even with the world that we're living in right now. It's so cool that we get to create stuff that we can literally use as a vehicle for personal growth and so i think that is just amazing privilege. I've seen how many people have used their businesses as benico for growth. So i think that it's like i had used prior to that abuse. Exercise fitness done not with my vehicle announced just using business. And i think that it's it. There's really no limit. I love that. I have huge believer. That there's no. There's no better human growth opportunity for person development of being a business owner high. You are forced again the bottleneck. I've seen it happen so many times. I've got the added show. What got you here won't get you there and who got you here. Typically won't the people who get you to where you need to go. And i think it's the primary reason for that is a lot of people just aren't willing to go through that pain. It's a couple of where they're at. And i know that You mentioned as far as his idea of being a bottleneck. I see that happening. So many businesses where against an outsider's perspective. You look and go you have so much potential and yet you're stopping how do you how do you help. People prevent themselves from being that bottleneck gyms with everyone else. She has work with. Yeah i think that. That is where i feel that. If you are all hardball and there's no softball. I don't think you can help. People grow because. I think that what happens is you're always hard on people and you're always telling them where they need to grow then they're not really receptive to it. You just trying to make them feel bad and people again and it's like remember how they feel when they're around you and so for me. It's it's really building people up And so i try to most the time thank like today for example for the first half my day i had all my one on ones and i think to myself every time after closeout of conversation did i. Did i add or subtract points from the relationship during that conversation And so. I always looking that. I'm adding points. It's like a game in my head you know. Did i say that point out. The things did well. Did i coach them on the things he didn't and i think that the part that lacks in most is A couple of things. I think i'll tell you the first thing. I just think those bosses don't listen. I think that most of them don't listen to their employees And i think that that is actually the root of most of it. Because if you've listened to someone. I think that's most of what they're seeking out and then they will listen to you and return and if they feel heard by you or by anyone there's so much more receptive if you look at like any book on psychology. What you're going to tell. And so i think it's just it's showing genuine concern and you know i do think it's a little easier for me to say because i genuinely still have a I still feel compassionate towards people. Like i haven't let the things hardin me. I still have genuine concern from humans. And i always look at my relationship with anyone. Aren't team any or any client is always person i and so you know they're gyms right now who i'm like. Listen programming closer. Jim like that's it. That's the best thing for you to do. There's people that have been our team's listen. This isn't the place for you. You can do bigger and better things. We have the spot rewrite. And so i think it's if you put yourself out there and you start the relationship like that which. I always tell people the beginning. It's a personal relationship before it's a business relationship otherwise the business relationship is just kind of built on a house of cards And i think people are just much more receptive to that. And then you know it's not attacking them about. It gets as soon as i recognize something for someone. I just feel like. It's it's your job as the owner right or it's your job as a coach clients to get them to be successful. They're not always wanted to like it. And i think the difference is that people associate hurting. Someone's feelings with being harmful just beginning. Hurts doesn't mean it's good right. Yeah i think explaining that. It's actually a lot of times. The things that are harmful don't hurt in the things that are harmful which is so ironic. That's fascinating i think. I've had the opportunity of coaching and work with a lot of business owners. And i know that's probably the thing letting go of someone or giving constructive criticism is one most difficult things for some business owners because of what you just said and they would rather just. I'm not gonna say all. I'm just going to do it myself. And was just work through it and then it seems to build up this cancer inside of the relationship side of the business to where eventually always explode. And then it's like you're fire mccaw. There could have been some things in longtime ago totally in. It's like they fire them because they didn't do their job right. But nobody's going to fire you because you're the vault so you can stand and it's so funny because early on i think it was like the second year business i remember on. I said listen my fall fired you the first place but you know i only company so here i am. I've got to live with that. And i did. I mess up. I ruined clear for the next six months. We've all had those experiences with that being said when it is time to let someone go how you doing doing a the biggest thing that i think in my mind when i think of like a a motto for that as they should always know it's coming like nobody should be surprised by getting fired unless i've had it. Were someone blatantly. Does something absolutely horrible right And then they still don't understand why there i mean there's exceptions to the rules and people are delusional but in most cases. It's that they should see it coming in. So i just look at it. Like how wrong would it be of me to not give them the chance to save their job right like i don't tell them ahead of time. I'm not doing my dog with my job is to make sure that they that i'm looking out for the person right if i'm looking at with the person and even if i don't really think it's gonna work. I still need to look the person which means i need to give them a heads up and to make that they have this time to either naked it work or get out in so it's making some big know ahead of time and then it's manage upper manage out. Here's the new expectations. And so typically what i'll do is set new york speculations with two or three time to tell them if they are meeting them or not and then by the time they're fired. It's like wealth for the last six sessions. Sally haven't done what i've asked you to do. So like i said three weeks ago. You're now fired because it's not working not meeting what we need to appreciate. That seems to be the hardest part for a lot of people. And i know a lot of business owners who will carry a lot of weight on the books primarily just because they're just afraid to have hard conversations and i think it goes back to what you said we're it's important part here is if you have those hard conversations earlier it's actually a lot easier for the employee and the typical realize it is coming and you know it's time free to move on totally. I think it's necessary endings. If you don't let good of the if you don't let go the bad you don't make room for the good and that is probably the most Business with people. I totally agree with that. I want to transition to this idea of endings in going through tough decisions. Because i know that there's a lot going on right now obviously in the world with craziness pandemic and businesses have been impacted. A ton how do you go about dealing with the tough decisions the best because there are so many contingencies rights even within our gym owners. It's like there's thirty five different scenarios based on where they live their lease situation. You know all these things That i think giving people the framework to make good decisions. The best thing that can be done Because a lot of people right now are doing a couple of things that are not taking the time to think and so they're just reacting to what's happening right now and they're probably in a very high highly stressed emotional state so i think for most business owners right now. It's sitting down and if you're not able to buy business getting other people's opinions who are people who look up to Mentors outside unbiased perspective which canal Up you know we have seven people we call when you need to make a decision right. Where like all right. Put a day aside. We're gonna call everyone like our unofficial board than laying out. The i think in alex i use this one in. Its you know the assigned recommended okay. The road less stupid. Yeah so his decision making framework. And i've read a few books on decision making like this is the simplist. I'll stick with this. Which is you know. what's the upside. What's the downside and can i live with the downside. Can last question ken. I live with the downside. Alex and i have now said. Let's assume with every decision we make. It is always going to result in the downside. Never the outside will then. What decisions are we going to make. Cool yeah and since he's and then you start picturing the outcome of each situation. It's like well this is what's going to happen this big pile of poop and so the bigger one. I like with twentieth west shit from shackle what we look at in terms of making decisions. I think that the decisions that have to do right now. I think when you're starting a business. It's a little bit different. Because you know it's where's the biggest opportunity right But i think this day and age it's more of looking at the downside and upside and really mitigating risk So i think that's what most people need to do right now and i think a lot of people especially in the entrepreneurial community right now. I don't know if you see this. I see so many people just banging their head against the wall and they happen since same heart and it's in some where it's industries that have just been wiped out given the circumstances for this last year and it's like they think something's gotten on with a few different people in different industries in the. Something's wrong that they're gonna be permits of the world. That was me in two thousand eight nine and ten. I thought i was going to be. Yeah that doesn't work for brutal experience. It doesn't work. It doesn't and that's why i said. Do you think an investor would invest your business. Now that's an interesting question. It when we make decisions in our business we say with somebody that is investing with us if we had investors. Would they support this decision. Would they want their money with us. Would they want to make that decision. And so i think it's being a look from those angles right. It's almost like you can look at your business and your problems. You can look at them like an investor. You can look at them like a ceo. You can look at them like an employee you can look at them like a client and if you can look through all those lenses. I think that you can usually come to a really good decision or at least the least bad decision. I love that idea. I see again. You mentioned this ideas for mitigating risk. I see a lot of people crossed life. Mitigating risk completely fearful. And i think that Especially these days you happy. Meal to mitigate risk without being afraid. And i love your example of those four. Repeat those because i think it's important people. Listen to this again as you look through. The four different is. Because i have people ask me all the time. Well what do you think. I'm like if you actually thought through those four different lenses you'll be able to answer that question. I'm gonna have to repeat that if you don't mind if you look at it. What would an investor. Thank this decision. What would a ceo this decision over the teammate of decision right me memorial frontline and then what would a client think of this decision. I love that. I think that's so important for people especially these days because it's it i know so many business owners. These are just making decisions in a vacuum. Without having any idea of what's really going. I sit back. I think when a second we'll have a pretty broad idea of what's happening right now if you to make those kind of decisions that just either it comes across. You're making this completely based on fear or you have absolutely no concept of what's really going on around you and i i feel i've just lived and breathed with business owners for twenty five years now that i i see these decisions these days. I'm just like oh. Please don't don't do that better than i think i think what it is. I had a coach in In the very beginning when we start damange And he said one thing which had carried to the day. And i think i have to remind myself at a lot which is remember when i first started working with them. I have a big decision to make. Here's what it is. And he was like. Oh no. we're not making that right now. And i was like why he was like you do i seen. What do you mean. And he was like. You're incredibly emotional. There's your frown lines on your face. You're like permanent browning. You've seem extremely stressed like this is the worst time to make. A decision has an interesting. He said rule number one. Never make decisions when you're emotional fair having. That's that's the caveat right because if you're emotional you're going to manipulate the data and information to be whatever you want to be because you're so sweet by your emotions and so i think getting yourself into a logical state which i mean you know you could talk for hours on that one is probably the best route to go. If you're going to then use that framework. No i love that. You mentioned coaches quite a few times. I'm kind of curious as you scale and grow You have attempted to outgrow some of your other coaches. How do you find coaches as you. Continue to focus so much on personal growth as you continue to grow. How do you find the next coach. Think that what. I've come to my now. Is that the bigger that you get in the more differentiated you become the more. You need more coaches so you need more specialization. Rather than broad and so for me rather than having one coach. That is broadly advising. I have like mentors. I look up to because most of the people. I would love to coach with wouldn't do it for as much money as i would offer. Just never make some And so. I think that what i've done is i have a coach. Somebody who guides me in nutrition fitness. And then i have on the business side someone who guides me in terms of the specific businesses. We have right. So i have a coach on the software business than i have someone that i looked to the service business. They're different coaches It's different strategies. And then in terms of myself i think like the uninformed bella one You know i. I seek out just started meeting with a new coach A couple of weeks ago. Actually and i found her through someone else that i knew and i met through doing august And she said she had a great coach. Since i met her coach and i was like perfect If i find someone that i really liked admire i think is in a similar spot business. I ask them like you to coach. You know who do you. Who look up to. who do you work with. Who stuff do you consume asking those questions. A lot of against the for those. Who are listening. Please if you don't have a coach. I would say going into this next year. It's probably the most important hire you could have. There's so many things out there depending where you're at in your personal life There are so many different types of coaches. And i think you'd have to low inventory of where what's most important right now. What's the number one area that you need the most help with and find that coach It's been fun. I know dan martell. United have obtained work with dan. Martell he's a dear friend for quite some time but he's also a great coach from a standpoint Get involved with russell. Inner circle and i've seen you involved in so many other things and i think the one thing leila's i take a look at your success. Both units are so focused on on personal growth in our coaches in. I think that the as seen just you guys have grown at such a rapid rate at. It's always easy to sit back and say. Oh i've done this all myself and i think at least i know for myself here. Click funnels the thing. I'm most grateful for the coaches that i've had that have helped me through a lot of the stuff that sometimes you just don't think that's why i love your coach giving advice or you're not making that decision right now. That is just a great a great coach it is. I think i think you're really right. I I think that a lot of people time i hear someone when they when they take a i actually so when someone tells me like you've done a great job even when you say ragged like a twinge mike wasn't me. It's almost like you found me out wasn't it I think it's because you look at it. You're like it wasn't just me. Like i was the year old but i got a coach in. I got these teammates. I got this partner and then there was the timing and then there was the market and then there was. There's so many factors. Of course a it you start to realize that you see that the patterns and people who aren't successful are that they take all the successful men cells right. Nobody helps them that he did open mail so totally by myself. I could talk you for days on end. I know. I want to be respectful of your time. One of these. I've loved is following your instagram. it's It's neat to see your posts your recommendations your thoughts. What's the easiest way for people to follow you. Find out where your on my instagram at. Leyla in horror movie and so they can follow me there and then i have links to all the different companies. People wanna brow. There are go check on anything. Awesome lou in other words for our audience here. No i think just Keep listening to you day. Because i don't think that i think that if people could see behind the scenes For me at least game two through. Football's all the events and everything. You've just you've grown a ton with click bottles and you're really impressive. Ceo so it's just it's really cool to know. Thanks that goes both ways have thanks again. We'll look for to talk to you soon found good.
Scale #1 - How to be customer centric in a high growth environment
"A low. Hello and welcome to inside intercom today. We're bringing you the first episode of scam a new miniseries all abide, you guessed it, scaling company. Over the next few weeks. You're going to hear a series of conversations with people who've taken their companies through hyper growth to tell the tale. The high growth stage of any beacon feel like a messy scary on quite frankly up pretty stressful place. So we're gonna share the do's and Jones for Ropley scaling startups. You're going to hear from people are companies like stripe atlassian on pipe drive where they're gonna share the hard learned lesson. Dave learns a scale their companies first we sat down with Leila's renovation. The CMO at survey. Monkey Leila's seen hyper growth, first time companies linked in lever. No survey monkey Leila. Joined the podcast to tell us. Why hyper growth shouldn't blind you to what's really important to your business the customer? Let's dive into the conversation. Leila. Thank you so much for joining us. Could you share you broke into leadership and your path to becoming a CMO? Absolutely. And thanks for having me on the podcast as well. So my Pathan leadership is an interesting one t- backup before the marketing experience I've been in in marketing proper for by nine ten years. Now, I actually spent my first five or so years in sales. So I was an account executive, and then I became a sales manager. And I think that's probably why I have tended towards B to B marketing and enrolls since I walked to the other side of the fence at work from there actually spent a couple of years at business school. So I had had some management experience in sales to set it. I wanted to double dine on that and potentially switch careers. So went to business school at tuck Dartmouth came out of that in management consulting, which also teaches you different set of leadership skills and pretty soon. You're you're managing small teams of of analysts and associate consultants as we call them. And so by the time, I got linked tune in early twenty ten I had some leadership slash people management experience, but it was really my first proper marketing job. So I came into Lynton is a the first product marketer for Lincoln talent solutions, which was their largest fastest growing business and kind of jumped on that rocket ship. And when I joined the company was about five hundred employees. He's when I left four and a half years later, it was six and a half thousand and when you're when you have that sort of career opportunity that's rose up all sorts of leadership opportunities for you as well as opportunities to grow within your discipline. And so I stayed in marketing for the four and a half years, but I had a different succession of different roles. Basically that helped me to see more do more around the marketing stack as it were. So by the time, I left linked to move to open table for year and a half in restaurant marketing, I had amassed enough breadth of experience take on senior role, and it's sort of gone from there. It's funny. It's like. We chatted to a lot of Simos or diff- marking Gators strikes me kind of like this sort of diagram of sales experience consulting experience and marketing experience and see him on the middle. It's pretty incredible just to see sorta patterns of the people we talked to definitely, and I think product marketing particular a great entry point for consultants because an MBA as well as that strategic skill set. It's the a lot of what you do in product marketing around messaging and positioning pricing lot of strategy and thinking about competitive competition and so forth. And so I find that the the skillset that was actually tr- directly. Transferable course yet. So today, we specifically want to talk to you kind of customer feedback. And I know you have been talking to everyone saucer bettas on just wondering like a very high level for listeners like why should customer feedback be such priority for for marketers into the nineteen. Well, how they sad statistic share with each so sorry monkey we we're quite fond of research as you can imagine. And we ran some research last year and find that sixty three percent of people think that. Marketers are selling them things that they do not need to. That tells me that we as marketing profession or not doing a good enough job of listening of really understanding the pain points the challenges the opportunities for us to add value to our customers. And so that sort of the starting point of believing that we need to listen Leinen to customer feedback more than we ever have. And then you you sort of can you can joke suppose that with well, if not listening to marketers and companies who are they listening to and the answer. Of course there Pierce, right? So eighty two percent of people said that they would find a pure recommendation more, trustworthy than whatever's coming out from the company, and so that gives you the very clear indication that first of all you gotta listen to customers. And Secondly, if you're not listening to your customers your competitors. Are your future customers are the industry is? And so you've got to have that year to the ground and really understand that feedback and not only measure it, but also benchmarking act on it. So that you can drive change. It's funny. You mentioned that sort of peer feedback as well. Like we've seen. Explosive growth companies like credit still send these sort of like, you know, companies that aggregate sort of like user feedback whack-a-mole, by the way, they keep springing up these these review science. But yeah, I mean, they're definitely a data point on a resource for for potential bios on a three you mentioned a sort of benchmarking because Murphy back because I often think from people I talked to like getting something that every marketer would agree with, you know, it's something they want to do but often sort of pushed People's Party list because it's may be harder to measure than sort of other marketing channels watt sort of ways of you fans to sort of prove the aura why of course, Murphy back in your career today's well throw up on that you might not actually have have thought about as much, but we've recently done some research to look at the relationship between customer engagement and feedback on also employee engagement, and what we find is that if you ask employees who work at organizations that believes their company takes customer satisfaction and listening to customer seriously. Eighty three percent of them say that they're likely to be at that company to your still I if you ask the same question to population of employee's organizations, where they don't believe their their companies really prioritize and listen to customers and think about satisfaction only. Fifty six percent of them would say that they're likely to be at that organization in in two years. Now, if we step back and think about how dumb Harda is to hire and retain talent, right? Every time. Someone walks out the door the costs conservatively is about a third of their salary to replace them right in terms of lost opportunity in and so forth. And so if nothing else the shear cost of retaining your workforce is a consideration. And it's surprising. How the act of bringing your employee base closer to your customer. So they can hear that feedback can really be a game changer in terms of having gauged feel with your mission your purpose and the value that you're adding in the world. So I mean, even maybe thinking beyond this sort of company culture sort of benefits that actually Murphy buck bring is. An argument to say that contra Costa Murphy can actually sort of grow revenue as well, as that's something that you sort of have thought about near career definitely I mean, I think I've seen it in several different guises. So, you know, one one clear-cut example is the customer advisory councils had the opportunity to run across really all of the organizations that I've I've worked in recent years, and we're actually in the process of launching a real cancels at survey monkey this year. And what I would say is the the exact composition on purpose of the council. Varied from company to company depending on what our biggest needs were. But something that was common across all of those was hand picking the right ten to fifteen people to work really closely with and the purpose of working with them closely was partly to to really listen to that feedback to make sure that we had an active ear to folks that we thought were likely to give us constructive feedback. And where the types of organization that we were looking to double dine in terms of building relationships with. So that. That feedback has seen that be instrumental organizations in terms of shaping roadmap and also shaping the way to market. So I think the sort of the act of that qualitative feedback has been has been super important at all the arcs support ties said, and then the other thing is, you know, if you think about the the quantitative aspect, right? The thing I see companies get wrong time, and again is not incorporating customer feedback into key messaging positioning campaign, ideas, even product names, if you got the product name wrong, you know, you're you might be screwed. If you don't position it in a way that really appeals to your audience. You're also not going to be driving results. The thing is it's so easy today to run a survey, and you can either you can run it with your existing customers. You can which have a service called survey monkey audience where you can choose the panel that you want to go out to very quickly Serbian and get feedback. And that will give you quantitative feedback very quickly on whether or not you're hitting the Mark or you know, missing it with with. Your campaign or your idea. Okay. Yeah. It's inching as well. Just even getting feedback on on things like names and logos. Obviously we saw slack sort of logo redesign and people said it looks like swastika or something I thought so even getting exactly yeah. Some of these things that can be sort of like missed along the way, and it's going to it's funny. You mentioned as well. They're choosing the sort of right customers to talk to one of the things that may be overlooked by maybe certain markers. You know, not all feedback is kind of created equally. And there's a big difference between getting feedback from someone who's sort of pair user to someone who's just like, you know, sort of single user on a free McCann's. So how'd you sort of differentiates between different types of feedback from users? Well, and again, it sort of depends on whether you're talking about quantitative feedback. So I do think you have to be careful not to oversteer into a handful of customers. Because if you're especially if the customers that are closest to you, you're basically preaching to the choir shirt getting very biased sample setback. But what I've what I've always tried to do in recruiting advisor cancels, for example, is to think very carefully the company's objectives. Right. Who what is the ideal customer profile that we're that we're pursuing and make sure that we have enough of those folks on the council to help drive the discussion. I also remember Lincoln. It was almost like picking a well rounded business class or something. Right. You wanted. You wanted some customers who were new to the solutions you wanted some who'd been who were eligible timers you want different company sizes, you want a different industries. So it was like taking the bingo card and making sure that we had representation across the different samples. So that if we were for example, asking them to review a potential feature and asking them, whether it was a single or double or a homerun sure that we would we wouldn't ignore the voice of the small of of SMB for examples customer base. So so I think some of it is in making sure that your very conscious of who you pull into those conversations. And then on the flip side with research. This is the power of the survey is that. It really is a conversation at scale, and so you can Cervi, and you should be serving your entire base to get that representation and make sure that you can segment on the back end to really understand different groups on what they think I know that, you know, Entercom, for example, having used it in prior lives, you can segment quite well within that to reach different types of organizations. Exactly, an I think one of the things I'm always particularly interested about is again. Once we've collected that feeback, you know, how do we make that actual head of these constructively because I think maybe a sort of a pitfall amount of people find into his actually, you know, putting so much FRANZ work into actually collecting that research, and then it just sits on someone's desktop. So I mean, what have you found particularly successful about sort of prioritizing sort of like making feeback actionable. Yeah, it's a great question. Because I do think the tendency is to measure, and then if you don't benchmark an act, which are really critical parts of the process, then it's really all for not. So I think the most critical thing is making sure that whoever is running the research has the senior audience that they need. To to actually socialize the findings and in socializing the findings. You have to make sure that you include that slide on implications and next steps and get the organization aligned on what needs to be different based on what you've learned. So I found that to be really important at any research, the Ivan, and then the other thing I'll say this, partly from my consulting days is the power of combining the quantitative numbers with qualitative quotes or something that will just bring that story to life for an executive is undeniable, and so the storytelling aspect of being able to pull an anonymous quote, or or even a, quote, that's attributed to a specific customer into that dialogue will just help that story. Stick more executives at the importance of acting on whatever is that you've learned some point to realize this humans blind these numbers as well. And if you know if you just put together a deck full of Joe, Slyke tables of all numbers tells you one story can be much more engaging actually have verbatim sort of quotes from people as oh, absolutely. It's why we're we're doing to away. I'm beat to be an end to be to age. It's really about the the folks on the other end whose whose lives are impacting for sure. So one thing I wanted to to you a little bit specifically because I know that every monkeys started as a largely seltzer business and mostly kind of Freeman was while raise that right? That's right. Yeah. So we have been around for nineteen years. This is our twenty thousand nine hundred twenty th year in business, which is just extraordinary copy on versus. We're coming up on that day in the relatively near future. And to your point for I'd say, it's a solid seventeen of those nineteen plus years, we were really solely a self serve business. So known as a freedom powerful, easy to use uncertainly AC to sign out for online software that you know, to to this day, we have sixty million of users and one hundred ninety countries and territories with two million people a day, completing a survey twenty million questions a lot of data and insight flings are through our system. But it's only really within the last two years that we have really started to expand in the direction of enterprise, and it's really been in response to demand in some ways from from a customer base. So when you look at our portfolio solutions, and in fact, people listening may be surprised to even know that we have a volume solution. So that's part of what this year is about getting that message out, but we looked we looked feedback in the form of her o'clock from was being used by by our customers to understand what where should we? Focus as we built at these purpose-built solutions. And it turns out the number one use case on survey monkey is for gathering customer feedback. So the first one of the first products developed is called survey monkey see X, and it's a platform that you can use to operate analyze a rigorous NPS program and make sure that you can automates it really delve into the causes and benchmark against other light companies to to really drive your program and hopefully drive your company in the right direction. Similarly, the second the second most important or most common usage of survey monkeys for employee feedback, you know, very important of constituency need to be listening and an acting on what here and so that led to the development of survey monkey engage, which is this easy to use platform for to consistently taking the pulse on your employer goes Asian. So so in a way customer feedback shaped where we took our product portfolio. Pretty incredible virtuous cycle that you've got going on there. I'm just wondering is there. Anything particularly challenging the fan, but gathering if you buck from ROY Moore's as oppose. To self-serve ones. And that's the other the evolution of our portfolio is in addition to the self serve product, which is still eighty percent. Plus of our business, we've seen a growing number of companies might want actually come to us looking for an enterprise version of that which builds in the right security access controls and so on and so forth. And that again was based on us listening to the feedback from customers to make sure we built the right features and functionality to support she back at scale, but in terms of gathering feedback from customers, I think the temptation there really is a decision. Your organization needs to make is are you going to over index toward your biggest customers so back to the the notion of who's challenges and pain points you trying to trying to solve for. So only organization can decide whether you're going to go up market and focus on large enterprise, which means very different cycle of feedback and input that that you want to to follow versus focusing on small business and more transactional scale approach, which just lends. Itself to different people gathering. Sure, I think it's back to the same idea of. No, no who your feedback is coming from where they fall in relation to your ideal customer profile. Make sure that you think through the idiosyncrasies and specifics of certain verticals, if you're selling into education or government or heavily regulated industries, for example. There needs are going to be drastically different from if you're selling into large tech, for example. So so you just have to be. The consultants, but it totally hands and there's so much more nuance in the enterprise sale, especially she get into six figures that you just need to be aware of your. Okay, this great. So just have one question on you mentioned that BB's becoming which is this humans. Are there any particular companies right now that you know, are being particularly customer Centric that you that you think are reading nailing into nineteen. It's funny because that's a question that sometimes I research team asks, and in fact, even in our S one when we filed to go public last year Zander, our CEO, we included a survey in the the the Letsie ios letter in the one QR code and their dog dog fitting to the extreme we like to call it eating in our own. Nobody wants to eat dog food, but we all want to sample delicious wear. So so there were eating our own restaurant. And we had this very short survey. And there to ask people reading the as one of few questions one of which was which company. Do you think does a superb job of delivering a great customer experience and listening to their custom? Hours and perhaps predictably the answer that comes up whenever we do this. Whether it's in the context of shareholder letter or just in all the serving that we do is Amazon just these a liver on their promises. I think that's alternately. What your customers want is? When you say, you're gonna do something whether shipping goods or having the right return policy or listening to feedback and incorporating it in the way, they operate Amazon's really good on it. Credibly, trustworthy, even their customer support. I think is actually pretty incredible. If you ever run into nephew, you can be pretty well assured that election resolved pretty quickly which things incredible for complete scale. That's right. And then might be to be examples is a little biased because I know the team over there. But I think in fluid is another. Okay. Does a strong job of that. You know, perhaps that's natural after all the develop software for customer, advocacy. But I think having been a customer of theirs in prior lives. I think they do a really good job of incorporating feedback and thinking about the role of feedback in product development. And in fact, if I can give a quick plug where we're partnering with influences with sendo so with a couple of other firms in spinning you're calling the customer part alliance because we all believe so strongly in this notion of customer feedback, and and really going to market with your customers that we'd like to make a little bit more noise about it gross on obviously survey monkey are the most customer Centric company of all. So we're bask definitely internalize this need to to listen benchmark an act on feedback in a way that drives growth in addition on. It's been certainly a secret of our success over the years. Okay. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you for having me. Thanks for listening to the inside Entercom podcast or more interviews, go to intercom dot com slash blog or subscribe to our podcast on itunes, Spotify, soundcloud, or Stitcher. This is inside intercom.
The Great Gildersleeve 47-04-16 (247) The Whole Town Is Talking (AFRS)
"Great Gildersleeve It's the Great Gildersleeve starring. How Perry? Now let's join the Great Gildersleeve it Saturday morning. Breakfast is over to Gillislee, his house and Where do you think you're doing? Not So fast young man. You clean up your room. I would like to know which part you believe you cleaned up. I glanced into it on my way down to breakfast and I cannot understand how any human being could inhabit such a room I'll faking it up. How can you get into such a mess? We'll i. know because you just drop everything on the floor off your drop them on the floor. Finish the paper. Drop it on the floor. Books on the floor of papers on the floor towels on the floor. Lose. Oh Hello Ben. Didn't see you sitting there. So, we have to go through these little domestic matters. That's okay. We understand each other. I guess. What's been doing? Well and get started on your own. Have you practice the piano. After this morning Leroy refresh. Reacted only black and. We go through this every week, my boy. I should think you learn I'll get at it. The worst. Boys. Well. Ben Haven't seen you in quite a while. Been Keeping Yourself. I don't know that Gone Java. Guess takes up a lot of times I. When if you fight me? While I make a phone call? Just make yourself at home here, man sure. I wonder. Just sitting around. Your grave applauded the. I'll be through in just a minute. Buddy. Yes, Alley! Call you in a little. I'll very alternate. Hello is Ms Piper there, please. Here. Hello Doc Anita how I houria. Didn't recognize your. Voice. Well I wanted to talk to MS hyper about them. We rise piano lessons and I can call her. Some other time signed Badio. You've had acted goodbye. It. been. Let's see you waiting. Marge me. Jump in the car and drive down to bees Myers with me got to pick up tire. At a flat, putting the BOOP boop. Well, Marjorie. She has some stuff she has to finish got I'm just waiting I see. That skewed. Out that morning guilty Oh. Hello What's on your mind? Come in, hang up your chair and take a half. And I've been working for. You like a job the last half hour working for me hired you. What are you talking about? Why in the name of Heaven didn't you meet? Leila ransom train this morning? Three Georgia I forgot all about it. Did you meet her? She's a Kranenburg. You're going to have to do some explaining. You want to back in her great sets. Of, course judge. In. See you there, Bam, I. Wa. I run right over there now and start apologizing. Tied I forgot judge i. told you that God you've got that young woman on your mind. Ben. I wonder if you'd mind the judge and I have something confidential do it. Would you mind sitting in the dining room a few minutes? Oh, that's okay that anyway. What were you starting to say? A friend of yours I hesitate to speak about personal matter. You didn't hesitate just now. Come on, say it. I dare you say it yielded. That's not the spirit. I say I'm bringing this up the supreme. You in this hyper girl up. I will not have heard. This girl! In fact, I take it as a personal review refrained from mentioning the Lady's name at all. The fact remains that you're making a forty or south link. The whole town's talking about you Leroy's music teacher. That's ridiculous. I've hardly seen the girl besides I well. Our whole relationship is something. You couldn't possibly understand curator and unique relationship. No Beautiful that's. Just so happens. He's a very fine pianist. into all the other decent people in town, it's just an old fool chasing after a. My House Mr Hooker immediately. Look at it. Not necessarily from the way I look at it a man as young he. And Olga. I. Go now. Really be I. Heard the Doorbell Ring I'll call you later. You talking about me not that. I didn't think you were. I use a telephone. Please burden. Yes, go ahead, help. You the bill. The fault yours. You. Wonder who was talking about? You couldn't possibly heard. Hello Ms Piper there. Never mind. This, together. It's like eating. Food could meet him. Terribly sorry to keep bothering me all the time I. Know Dr don't bother. I'll call her again, you bet. I. Recognize my voice every time. Don It makes follow for you. I don't know it's like you could see over the phone. Bit. You still here. L. Hair. I George. I had no idea might be I'll call now. Don't rush Mr Tillis leave I've got all day nonsense. Mars, we come down here once. Reliable source you. Know young lady excuse to keep a young man waiting the hour he got. Yes. Indeed, we're bands been sitting here for hours waiting to go somewhere. What's the idea? Five. Thirty. I'm afraid I can't go after all Ben. I'm sorry I didn't realize it was too late. That's okay. It is not okay. Please Mr Gildersleeve. It's okay with me. I'll see ron mark. Drop in soon again. Ben Larry Anytime. Anytime at all Ben. Ben So, Long. Goodbye. Along Mart. Well. That's a fine way to plead anybody. I must say. I say that's a fine way to tweet anybody. Are you referring to me? You think I'm referring to WHO WANTS TO DRIVE DOWN TO BE SMYERS for heaven's sake. What a dumb idea! If you didn't want to go, you might have told him so in the first place, instead of making him hanging around here for three hours cooling museums. Putting made him if he hasn't got anything better to do I had no intention of going for. Why can't take a hint for heaven's sake? That's the travel within. That's all he ever wanted to do was just hang around. These two old. ooh, that's. That's the silliest statement I ever heard been old, twenty, three or twenty four. Maybe well, he. Would look. He never wants to do any of the things the other kids do. He's always trying to get serious. Light serious, Ben's been in the navy. He knows that. Yet for heaven's sake, I want to enjoy myself a little while I've got my youth I. Don't WanNa. Start getting serious, not yet thought with somebody years older than I am. I the most well six maybe. Why are you throwing at me? All of a sudden? I'm not doing anybody just depending. That's all I'm saying just because a few years older than the others well. Uncle, Mark. You're not fooling me, but. You're not defending then you're defending yourself. What do you mean you just don't want people to think? You're too old to be running around with Miss? Piper. That's all. You, want them to think it's all right for somebody older to go around me. I'm running around with pipe. Really more everybody in town is talking about who is what did they say? What they say justice. Just as I thought, no one said anything. Anybody says anything. Well. They're just a lot of nosy partners. What do I care? All you do is think about yourself. What about this piper? You don't seem to care if the whole town laughing at her. I think you'd be embarrassed. Embarrassed Uncle Morton. How do you think she must be who you are forty four? She's twenty. How would you like people? Call you and fooled bobble. said that. You come back here. Right though. Thought. Bubble. That about her, he's fine. He's good. Well I. Well her happiness is everything. George I've got a good mind to call right up until herself them. Know. That's not the way. That can only lead the heartache. Face it Oh man? Unselfishly, GotTa. Give it up and she must never know. Never know how you. It's five. Better thing I do. I have ever done before. said. I don't know who said but I know how he. The Great Gildersleeve and Leila Ransom. We'll be back very shortly. Okay. I'll back to Gildersleeve. Or Gildersleeve victims of a tragic low I love. He cannot declared a love that can never be. For the first time he has had to face this simple truth. Joanne is twenty. He is forty four. His own niece is thrown in his face. He was missing from this evening without a word to anybody through on his overcoat and stalked out of the house. He walked, and he walked aimlessly pans rammed down in his pockets and staring straight ahead down lakeside avenue across on Cherry up hayvenhurst overrun would. On down. And on until he came to the outskirts of town. Meanwhile the Senate said now all that is left is the after. Their stance Gildersleeve, staring into the dark waters of his own reservoirs, while thoughts even dockers Goggle in his head. No No That would be the collards way out. Besides. Gildersleeve, you'll just have to face. Life must go on. Be Brave Oh boy. She must never no, no one must ever know. Well what the heck. What the heck here today and gone! Well. We Love I. Get your hat. We're going to the movies how one hours to have the? Any back. Talk! What, if I don't care to go to the moon, stay right here. Sorry I couldn't get the train Leila Tuna Ran I don't know why the Leche in the hands. I'm here system. Call you back the Josh. It may unpredictable. You don't how unpredictable I can be. I just don't give a hey. You chocolates. That one. I'm Marsha you'll Yankees make yourself at home? That's us. And is that a love seat? Sadly, to love sings. Why aren't we sitting on? What the heck. I don't know watch that in. I guess I don't care what I do. Now hard. When you laugh then. Kiss Lewis. Matic? I've never had anyone speak to me that. We're you for? A It shit gracious hundreds of them, but never will never like that I mean after awful. Beat around the Bush an idea. Bingo I don't care what the heck. Wrong. Now wait a minute. What are you sore about? Gentleman. Rush Up to a lady in the fog, kids like ordering a loaf of bread. Come on back and Saddam. It'd be nice. Thing about me. Out Than doing all these months I'll how my added who anything? She's fine. She seems to have recovered completely. After I waited on all those months hand-and-foot. Remarkable old lady for goodness sakes. The doctor gave off completely free months ago. I helped them make out a will ever everyone. Padded. A willisch confidential documents out Marlon. What you have. I got a lot of old furniture. Let's not talk about. Will things off that? Let's talk about. Have you missed? Meet Dr, mom. Yes I have. I'll bet you. I'll bet you. have girls since. I've been too busy. One Night I drop you dozens and just one. Father. Was He could? Haven't seen he good in a month. That's a fact. She's so nice. Of course she may be a little intellectual you. Know. Always had not people with ground. Odd My them terribly, but for a standard died. Better. Have our shed me all my Lima Lima. Charge you having a brain and y'all. But I don't mind. The boys don't seem to mind the. Brains are so important sophomore in the long run on me. You. Know I'm glad. I had a perfectly wonderful time. Dan and Shabana, because with holidays, balls and folks entertained Fahmy ever. All the time I was down there kept thinking of the good. I used to have A. Most levels. Well a long conversation we used to have in the evening. And then the evening without any conversation. Evening when I play the piano you when you GE-. Let's to that. No I know I'm. Lucky I haven't played all. Legal not the piano, please. As a favour to me, not the piano how? Are you ever think about. Govern shakes. ME. Just spiders forget. The good vine. Well. Give me strength? GNASHING pretty from the. Lose. To me. I. The. I am. DIDDY! Forgotten the words Leila. What's, wrong? Fish? Shumpert in on your mind. Tell me. I've got to leave. I've got to tell. Holly Yukan tally will. Let's go over here and sit down your. Show, you can talk to I. Like sitting on the rug, anyway, he. I. Love Sharon Confidence You, don't you? Go ahead sophomore. You think it's possible for people to be happily married. Leila. Wait till you hear. I, haven't told you yet. What I mean. Do you think it's a mistake? If you think there's any hope for marriage of May in September Nayan and chef Campbell well October. In other words. Do you think a few years? Difference in age is important. I'm asking you that woman I'm glad you asked me thrive Martin's for coach. I'll tell you how I feel about that. No I don't think. It it doesn't matter if Amanda Jones. The important thing is whether he really likes. There's no question about that. I'm Tom. Advantage if the man is. Do you really think. It means to be. March. He's able to protect the. That's right I never thought of that. Match not. Why I don't know any woman who doesn't find older men mall fashioned eight and then young ones who don't know anything with. Exactly. Eighty funded Dinesh with and all that gracious I had a flock of the Merimee all the time. I was in Japan and they would just as sweet as they could be. Just donate every one of them. But I. Don't know the as something of Adam nine. Ten Ray at the temple, but you're always hearing. People say that when a man Mary. Someone was younger than Himself Rock Martin. The world is for the people who are always mind and other people's business. Out of what they say. Yeah, what are they? No. Matter. What people get you love that kind you set it. Love can conquer and. What have you. Leela? You Schiller ever the were van. The slightest idea giving me new hope that's yes. I still get some big years left plenty of. What's more I haven't got much use for any man who let public opinion stand in the way of a bill happens. Because she happened to be a little young. Is that her fault? Is that any reason to condemn? There's a little confession I could made. It would be any conflict in. That I told a little thin I'm not really thirty three. I'm thirty seven. So. We're not really so far pot way. Leila. Strong! See you later. But I said to her just an understand me, that's. Joann. Doesn't understand either. But she could. Free to, speak. What's in Hyde? What am I afraid of for Goodness Sake Dr Needham? Much right over there, and I'll say to them I say Dr Need Him I'm in love with your houseguests. She's twenty and I'm forty four. What do you want to make of it? What to say to that? The! Somebody on. Dark. Didn't tell different. Though does. The love your houseguests. Evening folks. That you Joanne Music Gildersleeve. Glad to see me. Look here Dr House, gas. I mean Dr. That's not Dr Needham. High, muscular slave. Absalon made. funky! No, no, no, thank you. Just happened to be passing by just thought, I'd drop by and say hello. I said it. This is the united. States I'm forced radio service the Voice of Information Education. Talk.
How Wonder Woman Got Her Groove Back
"This side door a podcast from the smithsonian with support for npr. I'm lizzy peabody suzanne. Braun levine will never forget her first day of work at ms magazine. I was totally inappropriately dressed. What were you wearing with kashmir pencil skirt and pink silk blouse and a girl and i walked into this tiny room full of broken down desks and typewriters on boxes and i remember. Gloria was sitting on the floor. Suzanne was joining gloria steinem and a small team feminist activists and writers to launch a brand new magazine. It was nineteen seventy two and suzanne in her early thirties was already a veteran of the magazine industry. She'd worked at well established ladies publications like mccalls. And mademoiselle but she realized pretty quickly that ms magazine would be different tune. Ristic energy camaraderie that i had never experienced. She was coming from a different part of the magazine. World and we were sort of scruffy startups joanne. Edgar was a founding editor of ms. And she says when suzanne joined the team they just released a preview of the publication a sample insert in new york magazine and the response was overwhelming. The male person would come in dragging bag after bag of letters to the editor letters to gloria talking about what the preview issue had meant to them and we open them all and read every single one of them. It was truly amazing. So what did you learn from reading those letters. What what did you learn about what people responding to. It was a freedom to say the sleeper things that you thought you were the only one or you were crazy. And that's very empowering it was the early seventies a married woman still needed her husband's signature to open her own credit card. Many newspapers still separated their classified ads by gender and while there were women's magazines they were pretty much exclusively edited by men. Shampoo ads ran next articles. Like how to wash your hair and keep it shiny. The content had more to do what advertisers wanted to sell than what women wanted to read but miz. What set it apart from other publications at that time was edited by women. All the content was about the truth of women's lives. What it really felt like to be sent out for coffee when you haven't important job or stay at home doing dishes and cooking and the expected to be happy with that ms was built around a radical idea a magazine for women by women because one of the other things that women were told at that time was that you couldn't trust other women and here was a situation where women were not only supporting each other but trusting each other with subscriptions piling up by the day the makers of ms scrambled to get issue one ready for publication then in july nineteen seventy-two twenty. Six thousand women across the country opened their mailboxes to find a sleek glossy magazine volume one issue one of ms on the cover a portrait of power. That joanne knows. Well not only. Is that cover emblazoned in my mind. I have a poster of it framed in my bedroom. So i see it every day here is wonder woman this iconic comic figure striding with power into the future pushing away war with one hand and holding peace and justice and the other hand wonder woman larger than life striding through an american town taking whole blocks in a single step. She looks straight ahead. Wearing an expression of concern and determination. The cover reads peace and justice in seventy two wonder woman for president we in a war in vietnam we had a presidential election. We needed something symbolic to hold onto and terms of ms magazine. We needed something that would resonate with women so we needed her. But if ms magazine needed wonder woman then wonder woman. She needed ms magazine. That image plucked a superhero wallowing in midlife crisis and transformed her forever. From comic book. Hero into icon this time. Cy door the epic story of wonder woman how she lost her groove and how she got it back in a big way after the break can't get enough of side dorf well. There's more sign up for the side door newsletter to get behind the scenes content for each episode. There's so much more to our stories than we can fit into each episode. The newsletter is worse cider producer. Justin o neil and i can share photos videos facts and favorite moments. That for whatever reason didn't make it into the podcast. You can also find links to articles and more specifics about the research being done here at the smithsonian across the country and beyond sign up at sl dot edu slash side door. That's sl dot edu slash side door. Side door is brought to you by progressive one of the country's leading providers of auto insurance with progressive. Name your price tool you say the kind of coverage you're looking for and how much you want to pay and progressive. We'll help you find options that fit within your budget used the name your price tool and start an online quote today at progressive dot com pricing coverage match limited by state law. All right. let's go back to the beginning. So where do we start the story of wonder woman. That's a good question. Let's start with superman. This is curator at the smithsonian's national museum of american history and our resident comic books. He says when superman hit the scene in one thousand nine hundred eighty eight. He was an instant success. That man followed thirty nine and at that time. Comic books were a new medium like most new mediums of interest to children. It expanded quickly a lot of people. Were trying to make money off of it. So i think there was some parental concern in the first place kids into the publisher which would become dc comics. Knew they were onto something. Big with these superheroes said get out of the critics. They got a consultant psychologist by the name of william moulton marston. Marston was a renaissance man. And an all around peculiar guy. So buckle up. He was a harvard educated psychologist. He'd also been a lawyer a fiction writer and is widely credited with the invention of the polygraph test which we know today as the lie detector test and he had some strong beliefs about women. How would you characterize him. Would you call him a feminist. Well you know. I just would be careful. He definitely saw himself as a feminist marston. Told the publisher is the problem with their superheroes was quote blood-curdling masculinity the solution a female superhero and the publishers. Thought about it and they said fine. We'll give it a try but you have to write it. And so he did. He's pretty unique as creator and that he was a well respected psychologist with an agenda. Not just a political agenda. It was really more philosophical and psychological than their this is leila equity head of special collections at the smithsonian libraries and archives. She says marston saw comic books as an opportunity to educate people with americans. Reading one hundred million comic books each month here was a way for marston to spread his radical belief that women should rule the world. He truly believed that women were not only equal but in fact superior to man and the world would be better off with women in charge. And i'm saying this so emphatically because he writes down black and white in these letters that we have in the library. Leila redmi part of one letter in which martin explains how wonder woman touches a universal truth. So it says. I ask you to note the universal truth in my script about war and women taming men so they like peace and love better than fighting. This is the entire aim and purpose of wonder woman from nineteen forty one date which will live in infamy wonder woman burst onto the comic pages in nineteen forty one. Just as the united states entered the second world war her first adventure starts this way. I'd last in a world torn by the hatreds and wars of men appears a woman to whom the problems and feats of men are mere child's play with a hundred times the agility and strength of best male athletes and strongest wrestlers. She appears as though from nowhere to avenge an injustice or right or wrong as lovely as aphrodite. As wise as fina with the speed of mercury in the strength of hercules. She is known only as wonder woman. If you're not yet a wonder woman fan. Here's a quick intro. She comes from paradise island. A utopian land of amazon's she has bullet-stopping bracelets and a golden lasso. That makes you tell the truth. A nod to marsden's lie detector test. She leaves paradise island when an army guy named steve. Trevor crashes there and she has to take him back to man's world in her invisible plane. What motivates her love. Love is the thing that motivates her love Sisterhood this is jennifer k. Stellar pop culture historian specializing in female super and action heroes. She begins his very nationalistic character. Very patriotic character. It's her duty. To come and protect our country always stories are about elevating. Other women is romantic. Love apart of the story at all you know yes steve. Trevor is supposed to be her love interest but she's really not focused on having a romantic relationship with him in those early days. It's very much about. I can't give my work. Steve to marry you if i married you. I'd have to be submissive. And i don't wanna do that and so. She says that she actually says that. Yeah wow wonder woman seems. Open to romantic love. But she's just too busy lobbying for fair wages running for president and defeating villains somehow without even hurting them. She doesn't kill people and she doesn't punish them. She tries to help them become better. You know it's about. It's about compassion and guidance the comic featured a history section called real wonder women of history which recounted the adventures of women like florence nightingale and. Julia merson created by his own psychological propaganda for the new type of woman. It was about showing them that they could save themselves and that with the right training with the right education with the right support. Do anything that you wanted. She's like the original self. rescuing princess. It looked like to be powerful. Ms magazine editor. Suzanne levine remembers. Reading wonder woman as a young girl. All demand had little boy side kick and she we throne room. She didn't need any backup wonder. Woman was strong and sexy. She wore a strapless red boost. Yay with an eagle across the breast and star spangled short shorts short shorts and the high boots all seem very attractive. Good acted good and didn't need any help. She left an impression on young people. Some thought the wrong kind of impression in nineteen forty to the national organization for decent literature pronounced the comic inappropriate for us. Due to the fact that quote wonder woman is not sufficiently dressed and they had a point. I mean marcin had modeled wonder woman after pinup girls at the time. Here's smithsonian curator. Eric jentzsch anything. Interesting is fairly complicated. So you have this intentionally founded as a hero trying to spread this message but then you also have this concept of her being somewhat sexually sort of titillating and then there were the chains on september ninth nineteen forty-three marston. Got a fan letter from a reader that set off some alarm bells. Here's leila equity of smithsonian libraries and archives reading from that letter. My dear mr moulton. Let me start like this. The comic magazine wonder woman interests me as no other reading material which i have ever been able to find in such volumes. I am one of those odd. Perhaps unfortunate men who derive an extreme erotic pleasure from the mere thought of a beautiful girl chained or this letter goes on for a while. But i think kind of get the idea. The fact is wonder woman did get tied up a lot. Marston made it a central plot device. Just as superman lost his superhuman strength to kryptonite. Wonder woman lost her strength when bound in chains by a man. It was a metaphor or something. Her loss of power marston said is quote. What happens to all women when they submit to a man's domination but this letter writer had no idea about the deep psychological roots of this because marston really had a psychologically based theory about bondage in general. I'll say there's a lot more to be learned about marston. On this topic but this is a family show and we are talking about wonder woman so suffice it to say whatever psychological theories marston had the effect was pretty clear. Wonder woman was appealing to some adult readers for the wrong reasons and marsden's editor had seen enough so the editor really have to do something and clearly wrote. Please reduce the mention and showing of chain sixty to seventy five percent for seventy five percent reduction in chains in the wonder woman comic at that was the prescription by the editor. We later clarified that. The order to reduce chains came from the president of the publishing company. At any rate. In spite of the reduction in chains. Wonder woman was every bit. The hero marcin had envisioned and a commercial success to boot. She took her place. In the superhero. Trinity alongside superman and batman and ethically and lovingly kicked butt into the late forties but as the warriors drew to a close cultural shifts threatened to shackle the powerful pheno role model marston had created. That's coming up after the break. Love learning new things on side door. Here's something you might not know. The smithsonian relies on support from people like you to make all of the research discoveries and exhibitions. You hear about possible. Smithsonian experts are addressing critical issues in the field of science history art and culture issues that affect us all and you can be a part of it. A lot of people listen to side door. Imagine what we could learn next if everyone chipped in just a little find out. How at sl that edu slash contribute. We're back and we're talking about wonder woman. The bold brainchild of psychologist william moulton marston motivated by love peace and justice wonder woman stood for the kind of woman marston believed could and should one day rule the world and she might have gone on ruling the comic pages but three things happened in nineteen forty seven six years. After wonder woman swooped into man's world william moulton marston. Left the earthly one So after the death of marston other writers took over and didn't really understand wonder woman's radical purpose pop culture historian gen stellar in addition to that in post war america. There was this massive cultural and political push towards getting women who'd been out in the workforce back into the home when world war two ended rosie. The riveter was sent home to do laundry and a tidal wave of women. Who'd flooded the workforce during the war years receded then in nineteen fifty four. A book came out called seduction of the innocent. And it spurred a media panic. It was written by psychologist fredric. Wear them if my opinion without any reasonable doubt comic books he flings comic books for a rise in juvenile delinquency linked curator. Eric jentzsch again. Sexual deviancy oh my gosh. Our children are reading. These horror comics and their batman and robin are gay and then what kinda thrown into that too saying that because of her being strong heroic and independent and spending all the time saving women and girls that she is a lesbian and Not suitable for children were the appeared before the senate subcommittee on juvenile delinquency and in a televised hearing argued that the comic book industry was more dangerous to children than hitler had been within months of the hearing. Fifteen comic book. Publishers went out of business and the remaining publishers adopted. Some self imposed rules called the comics code. Authority which put restrictions on a bunch of things including how relationships could be presented in the comics as a result wonder woman soon found herself to have more love interests presented in a fashion. That is was more. I guess vanilla now instead of wonder woman carrying an unconscious woman to safety football style see wonder woman being carried across a stream by steve trevor. Mike this this princess. This warrior woman is dainty to walk across the river and get her feet wet and remember the women's history segment real wonder woman of history was replaced with marriage allah mode which was wedding customs from around globe in the fifties and sixties wonder woman had a lot more time for the romantic kind of love take for example this nineteen sixty five feature called revolt of the super chicks the brave and the bold special issue devils of the super chicks to chicks on a on a on a kick something in this story supergirl superman's cousin decides she doesn't want to be a superhero anymore and takes off for paris. So superman asks wonder woman. Hey you go get super girl and bring her back to do which she's supposed to be doing like and so wonder woman says cool. Go-getter gets to paris see supergirl modeling high fashion and being romanced by french men. And she's like oh yeah me some of that. I don't want to be a superhero. I want those clothes. let's get to. It wonder woman stays in paris wearing chic clothes. And smooching lots of frenchmen. They're making out all the time with these guys and really reveling in their femininity and their ability. To not have to be strong all the time and being girls and being women and being wooed and eventually yada yada yada they encounter a villain and they go back to their super lives. So it's just really weird juxtaposition of female desire duty like jenn then it hits close to home when you put it that way. Yeah yeah we'll end. The original martians wonder woman probably wouldn't have engaged with that internal struggle. She would. it wouldn't even be on her radar eventually. All these smaller changes in wonder woman built up to the ultimate change in one thousand nine hundred sixty eight wonder woman ceases to be wonder woman all together. She becomes diana prince. How does she actually lose her powers. Well so she doesn't lose. Her powers gives some up. Oh she gives up her powers. In a way that would have william moulton marston rolling in his grave. She does it for steve. So diana decides she's going to give her birthright say goodbye to her mother and the amazons stay in man's world clear in america and help out steve who is promptly murdered. What own my gosh. Right poor steve. Perceive newly powerless and recently single wonder woman now diana prince becomes more spy fi secret agent than superhero. She gets a blind martial arts instructor. Learns karate and opens a clothing boutique. Which eric says was actually a pretty good store. You know some of the calls were actually kind of cute. She does a really cute clothes. I agree i agree there but flashy wardrobe will only get you so far. Jen says diana prince doesn't really exude strength. There's a lot of crying. She cries law really yes. She has says tantrums. She cries shields machine gun. Oh my gosh. And if you're wondering why i had the same question. Comic sales across the board were down in. Dc bosses got ansi. They wanted to stay relevant to their readers so they thought what if we make her more relatable by making her a real woman but what makes wonder woman so extraordinary is that we have so few female superheroes or we had at the time that she was such a symbol of extraordinary female power that to take away. What made her special made her boring. Eric says it's not the super hip secret. Agent was a bad idea. It's said it was a bad idea for wonder woman. Imagine if you did that with some popular meal characters right in took away. What made them interesting. What would that look like. If if the same thing happened to superman became clark kent all the time and he stopped caring about justice and instead he became like a huge sports fan so nineteen seventy-two found wonder woman transformed into a fickle tearful moral and the united states in a period of great turkish faces after last week but only two deaths tabulated time fishing. The country was fighting the vietnam war with its vivid realities broadcast on color. Tv into millions of american living trouble. Civil rights movement was in full swing. Nixon was up for reelection. And the first black female candidate for president shirley chisolm had just announced her candidacy of the united states of america. And on the floor of a tiny office in manhattan the editors of a nascent feminist magazine were in search of an icon. As soon as anybody said wonderful and then everybody held up their risk to shows their magic bracelets. Editor suzanne levine again. She headed betted herself and the psyche of a whole generation of. Wouldn't it the idea of putting her on the cover Just right. But when the makers of ms went looking for wonder woman they found her changed and not for the better. Here's editor joann edgar. She was no longer a super heroine in the same way that she had been. When goi was a child. When i was a child and so gloria complained. Gloria steinem lobbied dc comics to restore wonder woman's magic powers and made wonder woman the face of ms magazine issue one in nineteen seventy three a year. After this image of a reim- powered wonder woman entered thousands of household around the country. Dc comics relaunched. Wonder woman she was officially back. Bracelets boost gay lasso and all back from the brink wonder woman took off in the decades that followed. She would take on many new forms on paper and onscreen. Linda carter made her legendary in television. In two thousand seventeen patty jenkins and gal gadoe brought wonder woman to the silver screen for her first live action feature film today wonder woman remains the most popular female superhero of all time and it was the feminist generation she helped create the transformed her from character into icon. Having wonder woman on the cover of the first ms magazine what this larger than life goriest athletic woman stopping wars delivering aid really solidified her as a symbol of female strength and power and feminism. It's an image safely in the collection of the national museum of american history. Eric jentzsch says that's where the cover of ms magazine belongs. Putting a wonder woman. Comic on display is one thing but then you put one comic you show them as magazine you show this comic book. Head an impact. It's made america different. wonder woman. we'll turn eighty years old. This year william moulton marston. Sexy powerhouse of a role model was meant to teach girls what was possible but she also teaches us about ourselves. Wonder woman reminds us that while our heroes maybe fictional their power is not we needed wonder woman in nineteen forty one. We needed her in one thousand. Nine hundred seventy two and we need her today. She doesn't tolerate evil. She shows us that. Kindness is a superpower She's still dazzles children in ways that can be used to encourage their potential marston. Wanted way back when. And so i think about why we need her now. And it's because she's a perfect example of the values we lead the champion rate now You've been listening to side door. A podcast from the smithsonian with support from pr. If you wanna see the national museum of american history is copy as the iconic. Ms magazine cover. We'll include it in our newsletter. We'll also link a bunch of cool articles. Zany facts about wonder woman that we couldn't fit in this episode subscribe at sl. Du slash side door special. Thanks to kristy guevara flanagan and creators of the documentary. Films wonder women. The untold story of american super heroines. Which really helped with our research. Thanks also to jill lepore and her book the secret history of wonder woman and gloria steinem. Thanks also to the wonderful people who helped us. Make this episode including tim nolan. Tom peabody john boudreaux. Sarah open falesa helbig and alex fairchild for more stories of important women in history. Be sure to look into the smithsonian american women's history initiative to learn more go to women's history dot sl dot. Edu poor join the conversation using hashtag because of her story on social media. Our podcast team is just an o'neill natalie void and kanana and caitlyn for tammy. O.'neil jess saddik lyric. Koch and sharon bryant. Episode artwork is by dave leonard. Extra support comes from jason genevieve at pr. Our show is mixed by talk. Fuda our theme song episode music are by brake. Master cylinder. Support our show please. Email sponsorships at pri dot org. I'm your host lizzy peabody. Thanks for listening Who is our man. He's only powerful for an hour. Oh it's the worst superhero the worst. Here's even in this one. His name our man in this one if you see like.
S05 Episode 6: A Place to Seep
"Shop kohl's black friday super deal. Get fifteen dollars. Kohl's cash for every fifty dollars. Plus an extra fifteen percent off save on google smart home products it amazon tablets thirty nine thousand nine sharper image earbuds nineteen ninety nine and fifty percents off games and toys plus free store pickup shop. Black friday deals thursday and friday only at kohls dot com select styles select us fallin number twenty six and twenty seven only limited supplies. My last game checks. Ten percents offer valid november twenty. Second thirty seven thousand five hundred fifteen bicester not apply some exclusions apply. See store for details September nineteen ninety eight when the cop family. I brought the bed into their home. Parents alan leila heard slowly made their way about the auction house. Running there is over the various lots while they're to fourteen year old twins. Jason lee flitted about the place looking for a potential bargain of their own. Though li enjoyed the world of antiques. It was really more jason who take on his dad's love for it as a gallery owner himself. These trips our were usually more about finding a bog into salon than for something to take home themselves. It was jason who spotted at first. The single honey oak bed propped up in the corner of the room. He guessed it was late. Eighteen hundreds perhaps with its finely carved headrest and fancy molding on the feet. Seeing how inadequate their son was with it allen leila agreed to leave a bid for the bed as a possible early christmas present hours. It worked next morning when he received a call informing him. The bid had been successful. The family lived in a modest two story home in the picturesque suburbs of the isle of in savannah. Georgia it is often said that the us city of savannah a majestic port town. Located north of georgia's atlantic coastline. Is one of. Its most beautiful. It is also said to be one of its most haunted with its live oak lined streets dripping with southern moss and grant architecture a colorful mix of almost every style since it was founded in the eighteenth century. It's impossible to escape. The air of the southern gothic for perhaps nowhere else in the united states is the gulf between aesthetic beauty. And the horror and brutality with which much of it was forged so thoughts you're listening to unexplained and i'm richard mclean smith. The story of savannah is in many ways. The story of the united states in all its complex thrilling and terrifying glory. I established in seventeen thirty three by british politician. James oglethorpe it was intended as a second chance opportunity for anyone stuck in the misery of the british. Debtor's prison system. Oglethorpe was effectively offering an opportunity to those less fortunate than others to escape the drudgery of life in britain in return for a chance prosperity in the new world. Unlike many others in his position oglethorpe was keen to avoid any hostilities with the local native american tribes maintaining friendly relations with the crow tribe most notably through his friendship with the tribes chief tomiichi. They're not above utilizing them himself. Oglethorpe also outlawed slavery. It's thought however that this was done less of concern for slaves and more out of concern for how it might corrupt the colonists since the settlement was only ever intended as a buffer to provide a first line of defense for other more prosperous colonies like the south carolina's any arguable need. The slave. labor was nonexistent. Everything changed however when oglethorpe eventually returned home ten years later as the colony grew in size began to take on its own identity the desire amongst residence to compete with other settlements the prosperity of which was greatly enhanced by slave labor only grew more intense by the time of the american revolution in seventeen. Sixty five there was sixteen thousand slaves in georgia most abducted from west africa and arriving through the port savannah over the course of the next hundred years. Cotton plantation owners from savannah were the third highest exporters of cotton in the south. The number of slaves registered in the state numbering almost half a million in eighteen o. Three ship carrying seventy five enslaved people from what is now nigeria docked in savannah the people members of the ibo community within packed into another vessel and sent a hundred kilometers on towards saint simon's island at some point the captives managed to overthrow the ship's crew forcing the ship to run aground at a place called dunbar creek stranded and with no hope of returning home rather than face life in captivity. The group decided to make a final stand under the guidance of one of the group thought to be a high ibo chief they marched together solemnly into the water from where they did not return in eighteen fifty nine at a racecourse two miles west of savannah in what is locally referred to as the weeping time over the course of two days four hundred thirty six children women and men were sold into slavery it is thought to be the largest single sale of people in us history throughout the history of savannah. Being as it is surrounded by extensive marsh and swampland. there have also been multiple outbreaks of yellow fever claiming the lives of many local residents most famously. Perhaps in eighteen twenty when seven hundred people lost their lives. Many of which were collected and buried in mass graves. In the city's colonial park cemetery savannah also played host to one of the bloodiest battles of the american revolutionary war with hundreds thought to have died in the skirmish then in nineteen o nine. The word is savannah axe murders and in one thousand nine hundred eighty one the merger of danny hansard a young tradesmen who was shot dead by his employer. Jim williams at his mansion home on bull street hands fits murder and the subsequent trial of jim. Williams would form the basis of the city's most famous book midnight in the garden of good and evil and in one thousand nine hundred four. The discovery of francis campbell's body in the tremont park area of the city campbell was thought to be one of nearly one hundred people killed by samuel little one of the country's most prolific serial killers all of which is to say savannah is not a town short on ghosts after hearing that their bid for the bed had been successful aisle jumped into his volvo. A made the short trip from his shop on whitaker street to pick it up with lila spending the afternoon lovingly putting it together when jason arrived back from school overjoyed to find it waiting for him in his bedroom just as beautiful as he remembered it later. Jason thanked his parents again for the wonderful gift before saying night and retiring his bedroom looking forward to his first night alone in the new bed he just turned the light off when he felt something strange at the back of his neck as if someone were breathing on it hurriedly switching on his bedside light he looked around to find himself completely alone only was one place. He couldn't see stealing himself. He edged toward the side of the bed and slowly here underneath relieved to find the space was completely empty looking up. He caught sight of the event just above him in the ceiling realizing most likely just letting at the better of him turning back over he switched off the light a knotted off back to sleep a few nights later. Jason was drifting off to sleep again. When this time he was certain he felt a weight shift in his pillow. As if someone who just laid their elbows are the side of his head and then came those breadth again. Jason shot up and switched on the light once more only to find again the to was completely alone it was then that he noticed with surprise the photo of his grandparents that usually stood upright on the table next to him was now lying. Face-down confused jason righted. The picture before turning off the lights once more and heading back to sleep the next morning jason's woke to find. The photo was again lying face down over the next few weeks. Jason continue to experience. A number of peculiar events sometimes even waking in the middle of the night to find all his pillows said somehow ended up on the floor having avoided telling his parents for fear of being ridiculed. Jason eventually plucked up the courage to tell his mom about it knowing. His son wasn't one to make something up like that lila wondered. If perhaps jason's brother lee was playing some kind of cruel trick on him with the activity seeming to center on the photo of jason's grandparents. She suggested that the next time it was placed down. They should put it back and wait to see what happened one morning after waking to find it lying down again jason judy placed upright and together with lila than waited outside the bedroom door to see what might happen with al upstairs and lee playing outside. The pair listened with alarm at the sound scraping across the floor opening the door moments later. They were shocked to discover the picture lying face down once more lila cautiously step toward it and picking it backup. Let how to paint gospel. The front of it had been smashed after racing to tell his dad exactly what had happened. Jason returned to his bedroom shocked to find someone had now placed pile of toys in the middle of his bed. After yelling for al and lila to take a look to couple joined him. Moments later without feeling compelled to ask if they had a casper in the house remembering something he'd seen before l. suggested that if it was a ghost they should try and communicate with it that night. The family place to pencil and paper at the foot of the bed and waited to see what might happen. It was one thirty in the morning with jason having elected to spend the night in lease room when the family appeared into jason's bedroom to find a short message that now appeared on the paper written in a childish girl it said simply danny eight seven soon after a second note was found. That red mom sick in bed died eight nine. Ninety-nine nine love toys. A little unnerved with jason and lee returning to bed allen lila closed the door to jason's room and also headed off to bed a short time later they were woken by the terrified screams of their sons yelling for them to come back down and the pounding sound coming from inside jason's room. The place had been completely trashed over the next few weeks. The family claimed they continue to communicate with what they took to be the ghost of seven year. Old danny over in one message left for the family. He demanded that nobody sleep in his bed again angered at being put out of his room. One night jason called out to ask danny was. they're getting no reply out of defiance. He took a moment to lie down on the bed. Having got up again to pick up some clothes from the floor a colossal smash rang out around the room. All about the floor is littered with shards of a tariff qatar wall piece. That somehow being dislodged and sent flying to the fl- that night allen lila made the decision to take the better part and sell it on. After another bout to violent activity. The following day with a lamp knocked over. Curtains pulled off rods and clothes ripped from their hangars l. Julie took the bed to the nearby kramer sadler gallery and put it up for auction with word. Beginning to spread of their parent haunting. the cup. Family were contacted by local journalist. Jane fishman fishermen who worked for the savannah. Morning news was at first skeptical of the story after speaking to the family however and being shown the apparent communications with danny he was no longer so sure. Fishman's article was released on october sixteenth. And later that day the bed was put up for auction and eventually bought by deborah brockton. Who ran second hand. Furniture shop in nearby pembroke. Thanks to fishman's article. Deborah was soon inundated with calls from prospective owners hoping to catch a glimpse of the seemingly possessed artifact growing tired of the interest. She sold it a few days later for five hundred dollars to faith to me. Financial manager for local car. Company had become intrigued after reading. Fisherman's article and was keen to meet. Danny a self plant was to keep the bed in its own bedroom in the hope that she might coax danny into becoming a regular resident in a home however after living with the bed for a few days danny failed to materialize and less than a week later to had a change of heart the following friday. The bed was back at the kramer's auction house that we can't emotion detector. The auction house was repeatedly set off despite no one being in the shop at the time the following monday. The bed was sold to detective. Joey warren's ac of the chatham county vice squad warren zach was the last known owner of the bed as for danny however and perhaps the reason why he never showed up at faith to me is home it appeared. He never left the cubs. It was october the eighteenth just two days after the bed had been removed. The jason feeling relieved to finally be rid of danny who just stepped out to the shower when he heard his bedroom door slam shot. He stood for a moment aghast at what sounded like someone or something moving about inside hurriedly. He opened the door only to find the end of his bed. A small note written again in that strange childish grohl that said simply danny. Sorry a week later. Chason was woken in the middle of the night by a soft clunking. Sound lying still in the dark. He peered over toward the closet which he could just make out in the dim light to see its door was inexplicably gently opening and closing of its own accord when he looked up from the base of it. The seemed for a moment to be the shadow of a small figure standing next to it. Danny is that you. He asked but there was no reply. The family claimed the next few days they were able to communicate with. Danny wants more when they asked where he was staying. Now he replied. The tea was sleeping above jason a few weeks later i'll bumped into detective warren's act the auction house although he planned to sell it. Warren zach set the bed up outta curiosity installing it in his garage ever since his dog could not stop growling at it while he'd been unable to shake the feeling that something in his house was watching him. It was shortly after the new year when al received a call at work from jason. Who'd been sent home from school. After feeling ill. As jason explained the fear palpable in his voice a man had just appeared in the living room standing by the fireplace dressed like a mountaineer from the nineteenth century. Jason had only time to look up and see him before he vanished just then the sound of cabinets being flung open and slammed shut rang out from jason's end of the phone. It was followed by jason yelling out in terror before everything went completely silent. Having heard nothing more from jason alvarez home to find the place a complete mess and jason lying barely conscious on the floor underneath a chair that appeared to have fallen on top of him a week. Later it was leila's turn to receive a call from jason. It was happening again. He said from underneath the kitchen table as he tried to shelter from the maelstrom breaking out around him as the same crashing sounds rang out from jason's end of the line leila demanded to know what was going. On as unexplained the mysterious mountaineering figure had returned again but this time he was looking for something for some reason jason had sensed he was looking for his baby that had been buried under the house. Just then another crash rang out. The line went completely dead but when leela tried to call jason back it appeared all the lines at her work had gone dead by the time. She made it home to jason. Who was unharmed but shaken by the ordeal the disturbances at stopped after this latest terrifying event however it was clear to the family. They were severely out of their depth in early. Nine thousand nine hundred nine. I'll contacted famed parapsychologist william role at georgia college. Who in turn passed. The case onto dr andrea nichols director of the florida society for para psychological research based out of city college gainesville in florida nichols was working with another family at the time that seemed to be suffering from a similar haunting the family in albany new york. Who'd also been communicating with their apparent spirit using a chalkboard to talk to it. I like danny however whatever had been plaguing them with far mormon lion supposedly writing curse words and throwing knives into the wolves at one point it had even allegedly levitated. Their baby out of its caught after driving five hours to meet the family nichols was given a rundown of everything that had happened. So far nodding along as the family. Detailed everything from the written communication with danny to the loud disturbances and recent appearance of the second apparent entity dr nichols was left in no doubt that they were dealing with. Some kind of poltergeist nichols took some equipment from his bag and the family led him into jason's room. If indeed this were poltergeist he explained. It was likely that danny had died in the bed and in so doing something of the young boy. At somehow seeped into the material nichols held out on of his instruments and moving closer towards the back wall asking if that was where the bed had been positioned. The family nodded in agreement. As nichols made a series of further measurements. He suggested that perhaps the concentration of electromagnetism but somehow energized. danny's ghost into existence although he would need to make further tests to be sure. After two days of inspecting the property nichols concluded that the activity was most likely a combination of the unusual concentration electromagnetism in the bedroom. And the psycho kinetic energy created by jason lee exacerbated by their relationship as twins shortly after nichols left. Al was inspired to make a tape recording of the empty bedroom hoping to try and capture some of the activity one night with the family out of the house for the evening. The recorder was left running the property later l. Sat quietly on his own as he listened back to what he recorded with allowed. Click the tape word into action and to quiet. His began emanate from the speakers hearing little more than a gentle thrown. The air conditioner humming away in the background. L. state in rat this. The hypnotic sound continued uninterrupted. Minute after minute until suddenly something else jumped out at the tate and let it play out again and there again. He heard what sounded like the squeaking of a drool or footsteps perhaps followed by the clear. Sound of someone. Something moving across the floor over the next few months as i'll wrote in his book danny's bed detailing the family's experiences things became increasingly fraught after the supposed to rival of danny. The family apparently found themselves contending with a number of other ghosts from a little girl thought to have lived around the same time as danny to a woman dressed in victorian era clothes as well as the peculiar fifty of the mountaineer at times the family would come home from a night out to find all the lights in the house had been turned off despite leaving them on when they left they would frequently have the sensation being observed by something invisible. Once jason lee returned home to the sound of something running up the stairs into their attic following the noise they found themselves. Standing up there staring at a mannequin. That al had bought jason one time as a practical joke when the mannequins head then moved in their direction. The pair were sent. Scurrying back down in horror in one incident. Jason was set to come home one day to find two knives impaled in the ceiling of his parents bedroom with a note telling them all to leave pinned under one of them after this incident however it seems whatever was occurring came to an abrupt end with little else happening after rare is the household without at least one ornament or piece of furniture. The once belonged to someone else. Many of us will have something once belonged to those. That are no longer withers to reminders of their existence. Just simply because they meant something special to us. You certainly don't have to believe in literal ghosts to fill the weight and warmth of someone you miss return instantly the moment you take hold of something that once belonged to them or conversely should an object hold less palatable memories you feel the weight that person slipped from your shoulders once the object has been dispensed with though such is life with or without such objects there is no guarantee that something of them won't continue to remain if you enjoy unexplained and would like to help supporters. He you can now do so fi a patriot to receive access to add free episodes. Just go to patriot. Dot com forward slash unexplained pot to sign up. Or if you'd like to make a one time donation you can go unexplained podcast dot com ford slash support all donations no matter how large or small a greatly appreciated unexplained the book and audio book featuring ten stories that have never before been covered on. The show is now available to buy worldwide. You can purchase through amazon barnes and noble and waterstones among other bookstores all elements of unexplained including the show's music produced by me. Richard mclean smith. Please subscribe and rate the show wherever you listen to podcasts. And feel free to get in touch with any thoughts or ideas regarding the stories you heard on the show. Perhaps you have an explanation of your own. You'd like to share. You can reach online at unexplained podcast dot com or twitter at unexplained pot and facebook at facebook dot com forward slash unexplained. Podcast one of the original stories behind thor hercules moulana and the little mermaid. Did you know stories. Like the grimm. Fairy tales weren't originally for kids and as such are gruesome terrifying and amazing each week. Myths legends dies in the stories from all over the world from local hijinks to zeus bean zeus. You'll hear stories sourced from world folklore but retold for modern ears the stories. 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"Once and for all right here now let's arrest ourselves of this notion that working and living at home somehow and make us more productive that our lives improve because of it I mean in some cases and in some ways I'm sure that's true but even on the show we've seen how challenging how stressful living and working. All the time at home can be. It's a known entity now especially for parents there. Is this Maddening Juggling. Act GOING ON. That's even worse than it probably was before covert. I relate to this fact no doubt because well I live it day. Some jobs require so much of a person that there just aren't enough hours in the day to get it all done at responsibilities at home a global pandemic and it can be nearly impossible to manage an average Tuesday a few weeks ago. I made the mistake of announcing to the boys. I'm going to the bathroom of you back in a minute. Please behave yourselves and of course when that happened. I closed the door. The kids ran outside. Took the dogs with them rant on the street. It's just so hard to manage it all by myself from the on her media this telescope. I'm your host Jonathan Hirsch and Monday Wednesday and Friday for the foreseeable future. We're going to bring you stories of people who are far away a close how each of us are learning to live through this pandemic our producer. Carla Green has the story. It's about one thirty in the morning and I think I am done working for the night. This is good since I've been up since about six thirty this morning. Leyla send has become nocturnal I'm GonNa hit the Hay and hopefully sleep until seven or so when the kids wake up. I don't think I can put two thoughts together any more at this point in the night. So I'm giving up. I'll review my work tomorrow sometime and hopefully it doesn't look too crazy during the day. Leila's house in the suburbs of Ohio is ruled by children three of them. They're four seven and fourteen years old. They're all home right now. They all need her. Oh my goodness so many snack requests every day and then the fourteen year old. Then if I get up to go do laundry he'll follow me and say mom. I just need you in the room. Just do here or I will get off task. Wait he'll follow you into the laundry room. Yes he'll follow me around the house wherever I go. I say you know what I need to go. Take a shower. He'll say can I sit in the other room otherwise? I just won't be able to stay focused on. I want to get this done. Lila's husband is a doctor he's not directly working with Cova patients. But he's still going in pretty much every day. Which means that. Leyla is home alone with the kids. So it isn't until after the kids go to sleep that Leyla can sit down at her computer to start a workday. It's usually about nine thirty pm right around the time that she used to go to bed and it was a pretty lonely existence. Not just because I wasn't around other teachers but also because my husband would go to bed without me and I wouldn't see him sometimes until he came home from work. The next day Leila is a special education teacher and she's organized sticks pride net. She Color Coats makes lists of lists. She says she's always been able to make the building blocks of her life together. Find time to do all the invisible solid Harry. Prep and Adleman work. The comes alongside teaching in a classroom. And here I was thinking. Oh this is going to be fine. I can teach my own kids and still respond to my students online and Organiz my lessons and respond to parent emails. And do all of that during the day. It'll be fine. I'm a teacher. I have prepared for this my whole life. This should be easy. She thought but it wasn't. It seems like you still have this idea that this is like your fault. Some how is that am I? Is that right? Yeah I think I felt like a failure. I'm exhausted and I'd love nothing more than to go upstairs and crawl into bed. This is from an audio diary. I asked Leyla record a night while she was working today. My boys were Especially touchy getting frustrated. Easily and my youngest was particularly emotional toward the end of the day. I think the quarantine is wearing them and I'm just exhausted. Teaching in a building was so much easier than this for awhile. Leyla thought she was the only one struggling. The only ones staying up long past her bedtime to get our work done then late one night. She was putting together a report about one of her students and I started sending emails to a couple of teachers that I needed information from for the report and I was thinking. I'm not going to hear back from these teachers until tomorrow. And that's fine. No big rush and then pretty quickly. I discovered that two of the teachers were responding back at eleven twelve. I think The latest I got emails back from another teacher was around two thirty or three in the morning and that first night when that happened. I was so surprised in the very beginning when I was doing this every night. I just felt so frustrated and angry even But then when I discovered that other teachers the ones with children who didn't have time during the day to get all of their work done when I discovered that they were also online. I felt like these are my people. I have found these other teacher MOMS Who are just trying to keep their head above water. But I I really felt like these are my people. Leila's been a special education teacher for over Twenty Years Scott a PhD in it and she loves her job. She loves the kids. She teaches second and third grade. It's such a warm sensitive kind class. And the students are hard workers and We've just had a beautiful year with this class. Then all of a sudden the your came to an end. I noticed at lunch that several the teachers in the lounge were huddled around an IPAD. We cannot be in close proximity to each other watching four announcements. Let me read from the water then so I went over and asked and said Oh. We're we're waiting to hear Mike your wines announcement about schools. Her rage mass gatherings defined is any event or convening that brings together. What what what's going on I knew about Kobe knew all of this was happening but I had no idea that he would. So we are now seeing today close. The schools to children of the state will have an extended spring for and so I heard what he had announced and it was just such a shock. We had no no realization that this was going to happen and we weren't really prepared to take this action and so we hurriedly got materials together and made packets for our students things. They could work on when Layla and the other teachers left that day. They didn't know how long the lockdown was going to go on for then know that it would be the last time. They saw their kids that year. We were so focused on getting worked together for them just for a couple of weeks because we didn't know how long's last that we didn't take the time to celebrate our kids to hug our kids to tell them we would miss them And I think there's just no closure and you know there's a little bit of grief I feel ineffective that I didn't get in as much as I could There's a natural cycle to a school year and this year it was interrupted for everybody when it all happened though. Layla didn't have much time to think about any of that. She had to get started on her new second job teaching her own children. I pretty quickly discovered my own. Three boys who all have special needs of their own. They needed me much more than I had anticipated. It turned out to be so much harder than I had thought You know it's tough when that boundary is blurred between teacher and mom because so many things that they would never complain about to a teacher negotiate. Well what if I do it for this long? If I only read for ten minutes then could I have video game? No It's twenty minutes You know they would never challenge a teacher but Layla did what she does. Tomato schedule now usually sleep until seven. Thirty or eight I get up and take care of the dogs and make breakfast for the liberals the four year old and the seven year old. Layla gets her fourteen year. Old Upper on nine thirty spends the morning working with the younger kids on their schoolwork. And while I'm working with them I do have my laptop open and I'm trying to answer emails address problems when they come up. Can you clean up toys to clean up? Okay but that can be challenging. Because if I put my attention on the computer then my boys have lost. My attention looks chicks. They have lunch. Leila's four and seven year olds offer a nap in the animal crossing respectively and she works one on one with the teenager and then we break for lunch around four four thirty four year old usually wakes up. We all come back together. And all right buddy. Do you WanNa help me with dinner. Okay that in. It's not it's mushrooms you like to help with dinner. House is going taste good and then after dinner. That's really when what I would call the Golden Hour after dinner. It's when the kids are all fed. So they're happy and they play together well and they don't argue and during that time I can really get a lot of. The Kitchen. Tasks the dishes again and cleaning up in the kitchen area. Layla gets the kids bathed but some to bed and that is one her work. Day begins around nine thirty and I think in the beginning. That was really hard you know. I wanted that to be my own time. Yeah this is when I used to be able to relax and put my feet up and watch a show or you know talk with my husband. Just have a nice relaxing time. But you know now. It's sitting down at the computer and starting working. It's been just over two months now. Since Ohio's governor ordered the state schools to close and in that time Leila's realized that her lonely hours up late at night the much less lonely than she thought they were at first and I realized that other moms who work whether their teachers are not other moms are doing the same thing where they're working till the wee hours of the morning as a parent and a teacher. Leyla straddles these two worlds apparent suddenly in charge of teaching her own kids and a teacher trying to coach parents through becoming teachers to their children. The parents really work their tails off. These parents care so much about their children and you can tell by the questions that they ask. These emails that were answering in the middle of the night are so specific to individual assignments And they they just really want to do the best can as sudden teachers for their kids and for MOMS who have a job where they have to be on the phone or available during regular business hours. I think it must be so much harder when they talk about how. She organized her days before. Krahn virus almost every moment is accounted for even our leisure time. You her lunch break at lunchtime. Each day I would Sometimes going the teacher lounge but mostly I would stay in my room in grade papers or prepare for my afternoons now. Leila's lost the straight hours that she used to stitch together to make time for grading papers or preparing classwork or assembling the individualized lesson plans. She needs to make for every student and her special education classes throughout the day. Layla got small gasps of time where she can get some work done. Answer some emails but not much. I know that our district wants us to do Zoom calls if we can hold occasional sessions with a class or with a small group of students or even one on one. But I know that if I take my attention off of my boys and say for the next half hour forty five minutes. I'm going to be online and you can't disturb me. Well they're going to burn the house down so I can't I just can't if you about it. It's not that surprising that teachers like Leyla who also have kids at home are having a hard time getting everything done public. School teachers are notorious for balancing on the edge of a knife. Underfunded understaffed sometimes forced to crowd fund. Basic SUPPLIES FOR THEIR CLASSROOMS. Leila says that her school district is pretty well funded but even their teachers don't always have all the support that they need. Our district has done a pretty good job of supporting our financial needs Of course we always long for more staff because our students need us in so many different locations in the building and we can't be in all those locations at the same time. The lockdown hit. Leila's carefully calibrated schedule. Like a ton of bricks. She wasn't on the edge of the knife anymore. She'd fallen off into the night. The House is so messy. Now that we're here all the time You know constantly cleaning constantly picking up after everybody or nagging. The boys to pick up after themselves So there really is no time to myself now. Leila's been back to school. Once since it closed. She was there to pick up some things. Gather her students belongings into trash bags so their parents could pick them up in a drive through the following week. And it's heartbreaking to see the notes that the teachers have attached to these trash bags you know. I've loved working with you this year. I'm so sad that we didn't get to have an end of the year party. I know you're GONNA do great next year. You know having to wrap all those hugs and well wishes into a note is so hard But it it was really sad in my class at the very beginning of the year. We made time capsules and students trace their hands and they measured their heights and they wrote their names and wrote sentences and Did a lot of things to sort of capture who they were at the beginning of the school year and my goal each year when I do a time. Capsule is at the end of the year in the very last week we break. Open the time capsules and do a comparison you we trace our hands much bigger now onto our old hands and we measure our heights. And Oh my gosh. We're so much bigger and we look at our handwriting. Oh My Gosh. We've improved so much and It's just such a phenomenal difference and as I was cleaning out my classroom. I came across my big stack of time capsules and I almost cried. I won't be able to celebrate these with my students and when Layla went back to pick up the time capsules and some other stuff she noticed that the school itself was actually kind of like a time capsule. All of the student work in the hallways was still hanging up. All the desks were still lined up in In their group Soren Rose. You know student materials. Were still sitting on top of the desks pencils and scissors and glue as if the students are just gonNA walk right back in through the doors tomorrow and like a ghost town on those exactly They could just pick up right where they left off. It was a very eerie feeling. If you down the right street at the right time the entire world kind of feels like that right now. Kind of like one of those scenes from a disaster movie the outdated newspaper headlines Grocery specials fluttering in the wind a slapdash sign taped to a restaurant door announcing that. They're closed for who knows how long a concert lineup. From two months ago. Slowly aging behind a sheet of protective glass. It feels like time has frozen and Layla knows that in some ways time has frozen for her students. Despite all her best efforts the best efforts of students parents. There's just no way. They're learning the way they were before in person together. I feel like it's sort of the closing of a really sad chapter in a book like this isn't the end yeah. We don't know what's going to happen in the fall It doesn't feel like this is the end thanks to Leyla for sharing. Her story Juggling life and work is hard enough as it is but so many of you have reached out to tell us about all the other ways in which your life is being impacted right now. Ream Zubay is a civil rights. Attorney in Perry's Burg Ohio ream decided to run for Ohio State Senate and had been out canvassing and organizing until covid forced her to move her campaign online. It's not the same as sitting next to someone and breaking bread with them just last week after a recount. I'm lost in the democratic. Primary ream who's Muslim has also been observing Ramadan for the past month in isolation Ramadan during covid nineteen and is tough because of the best parts over Milan having friends and family and large of people over for dinner and sharing those joyous moments with them. I've been very blessed in that. I have some family and friends around me and I have been blessed in that. A lot of my friends are very zoom and facetime savvy. So I've been able to communicate with them and perhaps join them over if dr time through zoom or face I. It's not the same but I'm very grateful for the ability to be at home and it's amazing. How much time is available when one is in constantly? Visiting Rich. Thinks ream for sharing your story. You can share your story with us by sending a voice memo to pitches and NEON DOT COM telescope is made possible by the world class team of producers editors and engineers that make up neon home media. Jonah Santi is the managing producer of telescope. Today's episode was produced by Carla Green. It was edited by Victim Patel and Catherine St. Louis Engineer is Marc Busch. Thanks to Matt McGinley. For our theme music and Blue Dot sessions for additional tracks here on this episode follow us on twitter and Instagram at Neon home media. We've got a facebook page now join us. They're just search for telescope. We WanNa stay connected with you during this unprecedented time in our history. So really please. Don't be shy share. Your stories with us are always open. We love to hear from you. If you have a story of life and isolation because of the corona virus that used to share with us you can email us at pitches at neon. Home Dot Com. Jonathan Hirsch just two more days till Friday we'll see.
Reporting On Mass Shootings: A Familiar Heartbreaking Script
"Support for this NPR podcast and the following message. Come from the UPS store, offering services from shredding to notarize ING to mail boxing, and instead of closing this holiday. The UPS store is doing another inking altogether. Opening the UPS store every Inc for small business. And of course, shipping in Thousand Oaks, California Wednesday twelve people were killed in a western themed bar before the shooter is believed to have turned the gun on himself. It has become an all too common scene. According to gun violence archive an independent research group. There's been a mass shooting nearly every day for the last two weeks NPR's Leila Fadel tells us what it's like to cover them. It starts with a phone call usually in the middle of the night. And you know, you knew that someone somewhere has chosen to kill a lot of people. Now, your job is to go bear witness to try to tell the world Y speak to grieving families on the worst days of their lives that millions of people can mourn with them. And no. The beautiful details of what makes a person special and what families in loved ones remember about their relatives who were killed these days. It feels like if follows a familiar in heartbreaking script, I the press conference where law enforcement officers tell their community was happened and reassure residents like than Torah county. Sheriff Jeff dean did this week eleven twenty pm. Sinema one receive multiple halls shots being fired quarterlane bar and grill thousand family scrambling to find out if their loved ones lived or died like Margaret funnels Husan Telemakos a survivor of the Las Vegas. Mass shooting was at the bar. Police everywhere. And one of friends, I think he got out much ten hours later, they found out that this time he did not survive. Neither do Cody Kaufman. Jason Kaufman's twenty two year old son firstborn, son older. I know. Who? Then there are the vigils. Z? The community ninety and comforting each other around a tragedy. And then it feels like it's inevitable that there will be the next mass shooting since returning to the United States from foreign assignment, I've covered three mass shootings in just over a year. My colleagues, and I share the responsibilities of documenting these horrific incidents like NPR's neat. Rod who's covered eight mass shootings for NPR the best would I can think to describe how I feel when I have to go cover one of these things is just deflated. I think the hardest thing recently has been this sense of inevitability that you hear from people when you're covering one of these is this feeling now he says that it's only a matter of time before it happens in your own community. It makes me think of working in Iraq. There were years where bombings were so common that we stopped reporting on incidents that took less than ten lives. They weren't shocking anymore. They were a steady part of life. And sometimes that's how it feels. These shootings, and is journalists we always think about what information is important to tell the public. I know is a human. I always want to know why someone does something like this. The why usually falls to NPR's Martin Kosti to look into he covers law enforcement. And typically is the reporter looking for all the information we can find about the shooter of getting really worried about that. There's research showing that talking too much about the shooter talking about his motives can inspire other shooters. So as reporters we've started limiting the number of times, we say the shooter's name focusing on families on victims on policy debates. Of course, there is journalistic value to look at motive a person might be driven by some ideology racism hatred of a specific group of people because he says often there is no why a lot of times these are empty gestures of violence that we should not dignify with the assumption that there is a reason behind it that needs to be discussed and shared with millions of people. There's also a helplessness to this. Work says NPR's Hans lo-long has reporter I wonder does bearing witness and telling people around the country, the hurt the death the destruction that people are feeling is that enough. We all ask ourselves is this our new normal this inexcusable business of carnage. And will we be or are we already numb to it? Lay? Lafontant NPR news support for NPR and the following message. Come from Cirque du Soleil, crystal a frozen playground of world-class, ice skating and stunning acrobatics. See it live at Capital One arena from December fifth and ninth. Tickets available now at Cirque du so lay dot com.
S3: Best of 2019: The Juniper Tree
"Welcome to park last presents. The Best of two thousand nineteen we have for you. The most requested arrested episodes of tales from this year. For more great episodes. You may have missed subscribe details. Listen free on spotify and anywhere. You listen to podcasts. It's in a small town. Many years ago there lived a wealthy Z.. Man and his devoted wife Leila they loved each other deeply and pray to be blessed with a child and expression of their abiding hiding love but alas a child never came each day Leila went into the yard and stood under their juniper tree praying for a miracle one wintry day she went out to the tree peeling and apple and praying for a baby in her reverie the knife slipped and nicked her finger. Her Leila watched as drops of blood dripped into the snow. The stark red stood out dramatically against the pure white. If only only I had a child as red as blood and white as snow and as the words came out of her mouth a breeze passed through the juniper tree rustling it's barren branches as the cool air washed over her. She felt deeply at peace. She knew it would be so the months passed. And the juniper trees berries grew moist and plump and she couldn't help but want to eat them all Leila eight with a greedy Ridi hunger until she felt sick she complained to deter that she was unwell. She felt something inside of her moving growing. The discomfort lasted for weeks. One night. She woke in a sweat dripping in agony she grunted and moaned and suddenly a boy emerged from her body pure as snow red as an apple. Her Miracle Baby was here Leila I took one look at him and her body convulsed with joy the pain head left her body Dida ran to hug his wife but as he did did he noticed she was suddenly lifeless. He shook her he screamed her name. He felt for her pulse. I'm Vanessa Richardson. You're listening to tales today. I'm sharing airing a lesser known fairy tale from the brothers Grimm. The juniper tree though oft forgotten the juniper tree features a wicked stepmother who makes the villains ends of Cinderella and Hansel and Gretel. Look like saints details on this. PODCAST are dark sometimes scary and full of adult themes as warning. The story of the Juniper tree includes child abuse murder and other atrocities. Please exercise caution for children under thirteen at Ed Park cast. We're grateful for you our listeners. You allow us to do what we love. Let us know how we're doing reach out on facebook and Instagram at podcast and and twitter at podcast network. And if you enjoy today's episode the best way to help us is to leave a five star review. Wherever you're listening? It really does help we. We also now have merchandise head to par cast dot com slash merch for more information if you want to hear more tales. You can find all of podcasts. Shows wherever wherever you listen to podcasts The GRIMM's are known for their shorter fairytales. Else as opposed to some of their French contemporaries who penned more elaborate and long winded yarns. But the juniper tree is an outlier it is much longer. Undoubtedly one of the more horrific stories found in their eighteen twelve anthology children's and household tales. The brothers Grimm credit a painter of their day. Philipp Otto Ruge with the story of the juniper tree but its origin is still unknown. Did wrong a right at himself or did one of his poetic paintings inspire an original story from the GRIMM's or was wrong a simply passing along a story he'd heard a horror passed down through generations. Rations deterred buried his beautiful wife Leila beneath the juniper tree the soil mixed with his tears creating a snowy slushy grave for his beloved wife. At first he didn't think he could bear this grief reef. Every time he saw his son smile he thought of how his wife would have wanted to see this bright luminous child but after another snowfall all as the ice thawed so did his heart he saw how much they needed a mother in this home he met a woman named Elsa and while he did not love her like he loved Leela. She was a sensible woman who laughed at his jokes and had a twinkle in her eye dealer and Elsa had a second child wild right away. Marlene Chin or Marlene for short. She was darling with round apple cheeks and charming innocence about her above all she. She adored her older half brother Jacob. She followed him everywhere and tried to climb the high trees that he did. Jacob adored his sister as well oh he looked after her and protected her the two were the best of friends they brought dealer much joy but elsa who loved her. Her daughter ferociously despised the site of the children playing in Holding Hands Elsa burned with jealousy. How easily Jacob won her darling darling daughters affection and admiration and what did he do to earn it? That love should be reserved for Marlene Chin's mother. Soon Elsa the hated the Pale white shakeup beyond that she knew how the world worked Jacob. The eldest son would inherit everything when the aging dealer past past Elsa and Marlene. Chen would be destitute just like ill so was before this marriage there was nothing. Nothing else could do to change Inge Jacob's position in the family. So she took out her anger on the boy. While dealer was at work she beat him slapped him in the corner cuffed his ears even though it made her feel somewhat better to see the berry red welts on his back after she took a switch to him it was not enough he was still still going to inherit all of their money their home and throw the mother and daughter onto the street every time AILSA saw Jacobs cheeks flushed with pain and the big watery tears stream from his is. She wondered why the strange Pale boy wouldn't just die how how much simpler it would be. She finally be secure in her home and in her daughter's heart one afternoon Elsa retired up to her room exhausted she reclined on her bed with her hand on her forehead. The mere thought of Jacob was giving giving her a headache mother. Marlene poked her head in me. I have an apple. You've also uncovered her eyes and regarded carded. Her daughter warmly anything for her treasure ill so hopped out of bed and crossed the room. Swiftly to a beautifully carved old wooden chest. The trunk had a large heavy lid and an even Heavier Iron Lock Elsa lifted carefully and with effort as if unearthing thing ancient treasure. This is where she kept her. Apple's so Jacobs grubby little hands. Wouldn't pill for them all. She reached in and pulled out the most succulent scarlet red apple as blood red as jacobs cheeks. Suddenly a dark thought came over her she. She felt chills on her arms. As if the devil were passing through her. She pulled the apple away from Marlene. She said no my child. We shall wait until your brother returns home from school. He shall have an apple. I Marlene nodded in agreement. But is very kind of you. Mother Jacob shall surely appreciate it and he should be here at any moment you also sent her daughter outside saying she should wait there. While Jacob enjoyed his apple. Marlene nodded and skipped out. What an adorable obedient child? Ill so walked swiftly back to the trunk and placed the apple back doc inside with all of the other gleaming red apples and closed the lid gently as if nothing were out of the ordinary. It was only a few you minutes before. Jacob came bounding up the stairs ill so greeted him warmly. Jacob regarded her suspiciously. She smiled at him and offered an and apple. Jacob raised an eyebrow no answer. What are useless child? Do you want an apple. She repeated mother. You are looking at me. So terribly. Jacob's voice trembled and he took a step backward. Ill says face softened trying to coax awesome closer. Would you like an Apple Jacob. Yes the boy responded slowly but stayed still come here then you take out an apple for yourself. Jacob obediently stepped forward and knelt over the open trunk looking at the apples. They were shiny and perfect. Anyone would take a moment to marvel before choosing one elsa stared at the sweet white curve of his neck his light hair swirling innocently up into a cow lick. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. She thought to herself as she dropped the heavy iron lid right onto his neck back up next elsa discovers the horrifying consequences of dropping the lead. Ed Now back to the story. The LID had severed Jacob's head cleanly and completely elsa stared in horror horror at Jacob's innocent young face staring up at her from inside the open. Apple Trunk Is Glassy and shocked. The head lulled old and dipped between the round pristine fruit as if it were a succulent delight itself. Pride faded to panic. It had seemed so oh clever in the moment but how could she explained to her family dealer and Marlene loved the boy so much. Fear swallowed her up as she thought about what might happen if they found out what she had done. She wrung her hands fretting. She looked around the room. Marlene could come back in at any moment and deeter Ter- would-be home for dinner within an hour ill so spotted her dresser in the corner of the room there yes she ran over and pulled out a beautiful who white scarf one of her most prized possessions. It would be ashamed to soil it on the beheaded boy but this would be her only chance to save her skin. Dan Jacobs collapsed. Body slumped over the trunk. She yanked it off stumbling and grunting under its sudden heaviness. She cursed his name. Elsa Hall the child's corpse to the small wooden chair that she used to sit in and put on her shoes in the morning she propped Jacob's body up and then rushed back to the chest to fish the pale head out of the apples. She placed the head of the boy on the body wrapping the scarf firmly around on the neck. At first it was too tight and the head was squeezed. Right off tying ahead to a dead body was harder than it looked. Ill soft opt the extra blood with a towel and quickly shoved it into the back of her dresser. Finally she got Jacob's head balanced just right. The white scarf had become a dark ruby red as it soaked up the blood elsa grabbed an apple and set it in Jacob's palm then then satisfied with her work. She serenely made her way into the kitchen and set of pot of water to boil for the evening. Stu Marlene. Marlene waited on the chair on their front stoop impatiently swinging her feet and whistling to pass the time. Her stomach growled. She was ready for that Apple. People had Jacob eaten his yet. She didn't want to wait any longer. She hopped off the chair and skipped into the house calling for her mother in here Darling Rolling. Her mother's voice wafted from the back of the House. Marlene found her mother smiling and humming as she stirred a large boiling pot of broth over the stove. Bove Marlene asked about Jacob in the apples. Her mother grinned down at her. He's in the room dear. He'll get you an apple. Marlene ran into the room and found her brother sitting stiffly in the chair he stared off in the distance as if he didn't hear her coming at all odd awed Jacob. She whispered she wasn't quite sure why she was whispering. There was just something rather eerie about his posture and his is glossy stare. That made her feel like she couldn't disturb him. She whispered again jakup. Can you help me get an apple from the trunk. Still he didn't respond. He didn't even blink. Marlene didn't know why but her heart was racing. Something was wrong. She fled head back down the stairs into the kitchen. Mother brother is sitting in the chair. deathly Pale. I asked him to give me an apple but he won't answer me. Her mother seemed seemed unconcerned. Well your brother is always difficult. Go ask him again. And if he doesn't answer well then give him a good cuff to the ears. Marlene winced she knew that her mother beat Jacob when he didn't please her but she wasn't sure that she felt comfortable doing it herself. Marlene tiptoed tiptoed back upstairs. Praying that her brother would respond to her however he ignored her again. Marlene didn't want to hurt her brother but but her mother had given her permission to hit him maybe hitting him would help him snap out of it. That's what she told herself. At least she smacked him soundly the in the ear. Marlene look down. In horror. Jacob's head had fallen with a thud onto the floor. His lifeless eyes gazed up at her blankly. Marlene screamed at the top of her lungs. Her mother appeared in the doorway. A dark and looming presence. She stared solemnly at Jacob's head lolling on the floor. Marlene was sobbing so hard she was choking barely able to breathe with killed Jacob she sputtered. Her mother shook her head sadly and leaned in conspiratorially. She promised Marlene she'd she protect her and keep her secret. Marlene didn't know what this meant. But she nodded. She needed all the help she could get. Mother stood back up up very well. Then we shall cook him into tonight. Stu Marlene's eyes widen widened in horror. She looked back and forth between the body and her mother eat Tim. The thought made her stomach churn surely she. He was in a nightmare. Her mother nodded. Are you going to show your father this mess. Marlene shook her head sorrowfully backed into a corner. Elsa tapped her foot impatiently. Come along then. Before your father gets home he'll be very upset with you if he finds out what. You've done Marlene's Orleans is filled with tears. Her brother her best friend gone forever. How is it possible? They were going to eat him. Marlene what are you waiting for. Grab his legs. Marlene helped her. Mother dragged the boy into the kitchen. Elsa all the while own cradled Jacobs decapitated head in the nook of her elbow with much effort. They loved him. Onto the COUNTERTOP clumpy bloody tissue spilling out of his neck Marlene doubled over wretched. Her mother ignored her. She grabbed the largest knife she could find the one reserved for large shanks of lamb and other sinewy meets. She began hacking into Jacob's limbs chopping him up haphazardly. A finger flew off and hit Marlene's cheek. She howled in horror ill so began dropping the pieces into the large soup. Pot what she did it mechanically efficiently as if she weren't cooking. Marlene sweet brother for dinner. Marlene ran to the corner and covered. Her appears rocking back and forth pretending. Jacob was outside playing in that he'd be back soon while her mother when along humming softly to herself self Marlene jolted up from the coroner where she had passed out in a tearful stupor. The door slamming could only mean one thing thing. Her father was home. Marlene wanted to rush to him. Tell him what had happened but she knew her mother would be upset with her deeter strode into the kitchen. What smells extra delicious tonight my wife? He patted his rotund belly. Ravenous Marlene watched watched as her mother smiled sweetly as if nothing were wrong in the world I made your favorites do with a new ingredient. You'll have to tell me if you like kit. deeter slid into his chair and ill so poured him a steaming. Healthy portion of Stu dealer closed his eyes deeply inhaling the Savory Aroma Elsa looked at Marlene Crossley and snapped her fingers motioning for her to get in her chair air. Marlene meekly obliged her mother. Ladle the stew into herbal. Marlene stared at the chunky soup. As if Jacob's CBS face might come floating to the surface at any moment. Where is my son? Marlene's father suddenly asked loudly looking around the room. Ill Elsa barely glanced over at him nonchalantly settling into her seat. Marlene's mother says simply explained that Jacob had gone to visit his mother's family molly and would be gone for some time Marlene's father's mouth dropped. Open my young son set out across the country without saying saying Goodbye Elsa shrugged as if this development were completely normal. He wanted to go and asked if he could stay for six weeks by said it was fine and he will be quite well taken care of their dealer shook his head he muttered over and over that he couldn't believe his son left without saying goodbye. EAT HUSBAND ELSA chided. Marlene watched wide-eyed as her father took a bite of the stew. His eyes rolled rolled back in his head in culinary ecstasy wife. You have outdone yourself. This is the most delicious thing I've ever eaten dealer you're said as he ravenously scooped up more. Marlene burst into tears. deeter glanced over at her. Why why is she crying? Elsa answered between Greedy slurps Oh. She just misses her brother. Dealer nodded consumed with the meal. He inhaled his bowl faster than Marlene had ever seen him. Eat More Biwott. More Elsa quickly doled out another serving and Marlene in continued weeping at the horror of her father. Eating brother finished with his second serving almost as soon as it hit his bowl dealers. Insatiable insatiable is turned to Marlene's bowl. Are you going to eat that. Marlene shook her head. Tears streaming down her flush cheeks her her father grabbed Marlene's bowl and inhaled that as well he then began to suck the bones once his bowl was dry pulling every last asked gristle and Sununu off with his teeth. Then picking the stuck bids out with his fingers. Marlene thought she might vomit. Even though she hadn't touched any of her meal she noticed her. Mother was stirring it around in her bowl. Barely picking at it until dealer consumed that to at last dealer was full drowsy. The Soup Gone Jacob gone when her parents went to bed. Marlene gathered all of Jacob's bones. She didn't want her mother to take all she had left of him. She grabbed the skull hidden in the kitchen. Corner corner behind the broom. She had seen her mother. Shove it there. Before her father could notice marlene ran to her room and found her nicest silk handkerchief. Jeff she carefully wrapped the bones up in them fingers shaking still in shock. These were the remains of her brother. Marlene ran to the juniper tree and fell to her knees beneath it's thick bushy branches. Weeping openly and loudly now she set the bones carefully and reverently a thick patch of grass and then collapsed on her back next to them. She closed her eyes and felt her chest rising and falling. It calmed her with each breath. She felt the sadness. Leave her body letting the earth take it for her. Suddenly the ground was shaking now. What was happening panicked? Marlene opened her eyes to see what new torment had befallen her. The entire juniper tree was moving and trembling so intensely the Earth beneath her shook it undulated in a beautiful hypnotic Nautica rhythm as if it were dancing just for her. Marlene was enchanted. was possible the tree was doing this. For Jacob Marlene stood on her feet backing away. From the juniper tree afraid that it might uproot and topple over but instead of crashing down a white mist emerged from its roots. Shrouding the tree entirely the missed reached out to her pulling her closer. Marlene screamed unable to run. She couldn't even see it was so thick she spun around. It was hopeless the mist was going to suffocate. Her up next Marlene discovers. What's hiding hiding in the midst now? Back to the story. Marlene was choking. She was dizzy from spinning around. In the thick fog trying to claw her way out she finally managed to crawl on the ground a few feet out of the the thick of it. She turned back to see if it was gaining on her. The mist swirled around the tree. Faster and faster until it appeared to create a fire fire and out of that fire careened a magnificent silver plumed bird it shot into the sky as if reaching for the heavens. Marlene blinked rapidly and tried to follow the bird but it was gone too soon. She turned back to the tree. which had stopped twisting and shaking being the midst quickly evaporated and everything returned to how it had been as she looked down to the grass? She could see the handkerchief. The bones were gone far above marlene. The bird was on a mission. It had the blood of Leila the bones of Jacob and the magic of the juniper tree now it simply needed three items to enact revenge. The bird ducked weaved through the sky until it found what it sought a goldsmith. The bird flu right up to his window and began to sing a gorgeous lilting tune with words that told his his tail. My mother she killed me my father. He ate me my sister. Marlene gathered all my bones. Tide them in a silk scarf. Lay them beneath the juniper tree. Tweet tweet what a Beautiful Bird I. The Goldsmith set down on his tools intrigued by the most beautiful notes. He'd ever heard strung together mesmerized just as the bird intended he stumbled tumbled from his workplace into the street after the bird in his haste. He lost a shoe bird bird he called after it. You sing like an angel. Please please come to me and sing it just once more. The bird flatly refused informing the goldsmith that he did not sing twice without something in exchange if he wanted to hear it again. The bird demanded the gold chain that he had spied the Goldsmith working on the goldsmith obliged placing the exquisite wisit gold chain at the birds feet. He picked it up with his right claw and once again enthralled the Goldsmith with his other worldly song when he was finished the bird alighted once more into the sky this time swooping down to the low sloping roof of a shoemaker once again and the bird launched into his beautiful tale of woe my mother she killed me my father he ate me my sister. Marlene gathered heard all my bones tied them in a silk scarf laid them beneath the juniper tree tweet tweet what a beautiful bird am i. The shoemaker shoemakers set down his boot and ran outside and transferred by the beautiful bird on the roof. Pleased burge singer Song again. I've never heard anything so lovely as the bird laughed at the man's request the shoemaker called for his family to come out they all stared up at the bird unsure what they were waiting for. Go on now ordered. The shoemaker. Sing for US wife. You will not believe how beautifully okay. This bird sings. No the bird replied flatly. I will only sing it again if you give me something. In exchange there is a pair pair of red shoes on your top shelf. Bring them to me. The shoemaker and his wife exchanged helpless glances the wife disappeared back inside and returned with gleaming pair of red shoes perfect. The bird picked up the pair of shoes with his left claw and returned into his perch on the roof. He launched into his glorious song and the crowds faces glowed under the spell of his melody. Once the bird bird had dazzled the shoemaker and his family he flew far away into the forest gold chain in one claw red shoes in the other his eyes his darted left and right searching once again he dipped down there. It was a mill. He watched the millers apprentices cutting and chiseling a stone. The bird landed on a Linden tree nearby and began to sing his song. One of the men set down his tools trying to find find where the sounds. Were coming from another man followed suit then another as if hypnotized. They wandered over to the tree where the bird perched. When he was finished singing there was a hush over the men? One of the men finally stepped forward. Please sing it again bird. I only caught that last. I bit the other. Men nodded explaining. They couldn't hear it in its full glory. Because they had been working the bird clucked. He needed something in exchange range for a second singing and he wanted that millstone. The men were aghast at the bold request the lead apprentice stepped forward. We would give it to you friend but we work for our boss. It's his stone to give. The bird stared at them. He was not here to negotiate. The men huddled together and came to a consensus that it was worth giving him the stone to hear the song just once more they called the Byrd down and it took doc all of them to lift the stone over the bird's neck. They feared the stone would crush him. He was so fine and delicate but as they lowered toward the stone over his head. The heavy millstone slipped down around his neck as if it were merely a light caller the men stood open-mouthed at the miracle but before they had a chance to speak the bird flu up to the tree and sang even more beautifully than before the bird finished and headed back into town quite a sight to behold an alluring silver plumed bird with a fancy chain in one claw a pair of red shoes in another and a millstone around his neck back at the house later that evening. Marlene sat around the fire with her mother and father other debtor smoked a pipe. Thoughtfully Ilson knitted furiously in her rocking chair. Marlene curled up. In the corner whimpering still inconsolable. Suddenly her father sat up straight his mood shifting. I feel so happy and content. I don't know what has come over over me. I don't know what you're talking about. Marlene's mother responded. I feel terrible in my bones. It feels like a storm is coming. Marlene's mother was sweating. She unleashed her bodice. She was panicking now rubbing her jaw. Marlene worried for her. Suddenly sonorous sounds filled. The room coming from outside there was a bird in the juniper tree and it was singing it's sad tale will my mother. She killed me. Marlene's mother covered her ears. That noise make it stop but Marlene's father could not see her pain. I mean it was as if he were in a trance. My father he ate me deeter walked towards the bird and the bird flu closer to meet him my my sister. Marlene gathered all my bones tied them in a silken scarf. The bird dropped the gold chain from his claw and it fell perfectly over over dealers head. He looked down in wonder at the gift inside. elsom moaned in horror on the floor covering her ears. Marlene Marlena ignored her mother. Enchanted by the bird gathered all my bones tied them in a silken scarf. Marlene walked into the yard. awestruck truck it was the bird she had seen emerged from the mists earlier. He was back the bird flu over to greet her and tossed the pair of red shoes. WHO's dangling from his left claw down to her? Marlene squealed in delight. She had never had such lovely shoes before laid them beneath. The juniper Retrea tweet tweet what a Beautiful Bird Am I. She looked back inside hoping her mother would join. She beckoned her to come out and see the beautiful bird bearing gifts finally ill stumbled outside as soon as she did. The bird. Flu over to her Marlene's Orleans mother looked above her and screened. The bird. Dropped the millstone right on. Ill says head cracking being her skull and killing her instantly as soon as the stone landed on her skull she was engulfed in flames. Smoke and fire rose rose from the place that the millstone landed Marlene. And her father watched open-mouthed they coughed waving the thick curls of smoke out of their faces finally dissipated until there was nothing left. Marlene's mother was gone but in her place standing ending right in front of them. Was Jacob Alive and gleaming white and red as ever marlene rushed to her brother and practically league toppled him. She was so overjoyed to see him. She hadn't killed him after all. Her mother had fixed everything. They hugged savouring during their tearful reunion on the lawn. At last Jacobs said. They mustn't fuss over him so he just wanted to go to bed. He'd sleep well now that ill so was dead. Any sadness dealer and Marlene felt at the loss of their wife and mother was replaced by their joy at being reunited with Jacob Job. Perhaps it was because of magic or perhaps they'd always known in their hearts that she was a spiteful woman driven by hate and fear. Marlene didn't let go of Jacob's hand as they walked back inside the house and lived happily ever after even though this tale has a happy ending extreme malice and horror dominate the story undermining its cheery resolution and with lingering images of abuse and gruesome death and while the stepmother's actions are indeed extreme the brothers Grimm would have understood how challenging rolling in real. The concern for parents were of this age knowing that there would be another sibling. Standing in the way of their own children's financial security in the world. And how tempting it would be to take matters into their own hands. Hopefully third wife doesn't feel so threatened threatened. Thanks for listening to tales. We'll be back in two weeks with a new episode. You can find more episodes of tales as well as all of our casts shows on Apple. PODCASTS spotify stitcher Google Google play or your favorite podcast directory. Several of you who've asked how to help us well if you enjoy the show. The best way to help is to leave a five star review and don't forget get to follow us on facebook and Instagram at podcast and twitter at park cast network. We'll see you next time. Join me in two weeks for another third darkened. Surprising fairy tale tales was created by Max Cutler is a production of cutler media. And is part of the podcast network it is produced by Max and Ron Cutler with sound design by Karie Murphy Production Assistance by Ron Shapiro and Paul Libeskind additional production assistance by Maggie admire and Freddie Beckley Tales is written by Gina. Matuzek I'm Vanessa Richardson.