17 Burst results for "Kris K Kepler"

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

04:21 min | Last month

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"It's your life they're just an unwanted guest. Give them lots of compliments. Some people's Egos need a constant IV drip of self esteem. They can't function unless they think they're the best. So you have to make them feel that way otherwise they'll fall apart and if you depend on them for anything, you don't want that happening try to depend on them less in the meantime flatter them. Don't ever disagree with them. Mature people can handle disagreements others can't they see contradictions as an attack on their identity they won't respond to your ideas. They'll just react though probably due at passive aggressively. Let them take credit truly smart people dine out on quiet credit their friends and colleagues might not praise them openly to their face. But everyone says good things about them behind their back if you're awesome word gets around, you know it. Someone would dunning Kruger doesn't have a tolerance for quiet credit. They want their praises Sung loudly even if it's for doing the bare minimum. So just play along with it. Everyone knows the real story. Let them save a little face some people screw up all the time. If they couldn't save face, you'd be looking at their bare skull by now they'll never remember their mistakes they won't learn from them. So why bother smart mature people sometimes feel the need to drive home someone else's failures and remind them of all their shortcomings but they rarely indulge they know how pointless it is. Remember what you like about them. Maybe they're fun to be around most of the time even if you don't quite know why don't think about it just enjoy them maybe they're incredibly hot. It's not the best reason to date someone but hey, it's not the absolute worst reason either we've all done it. We've put up with quite a lot out of someone's simply because we found them so attractive. Some of US have to get that out of our system before we can move onto more mature relationships. Don't try to make. Them Smarter. You remember the Safest Smith Right that rock is going to roll right back down the hill. No matter how high you elevate it don't roll a rock up a hill and then let it roll back over you. Some people don't want to be smart mature sex successful or anything else. They simply want the illusion of it. They spend all their time perfecting. The solution on fortunately you see right through it but they can't because it's there's the rock doesn't know it's part of a myth don't try to understand them one person I know somehow made it through forty years on this planet without learning what cement on an email then he tried to explain it to me I let him it just wasn't worth it. Let them have the last word. The last word is over rated only the pettiest people need to get in the last word it's usually pretty weak. Your silence is far more powerful. People would done in Kruger are everywhere. You're either dating someone like this or you have a friend like this maybe you have a boss like this. The truth here is simple. You can't really change anyone everyone has to change themselves. All you can do is manage them if you can't or decide they're not worth the trouble anymore than it's time to get them out of your life. There's good news. If you dump someone with Dunning Kruger, you can tell them it's not you. It's me and they'll actually believe you. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria quarter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website www dot Chris kepler dot com..

US Dunning Kruger dunning Kruger Kruger Kris K. K. Aria facebook Kris K. Kepler
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

03:29 min | Last month

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Laughed out loud but was it funny? I. Think it's a laugh or you'll cry type of thing I also think everyone should celebrate turning fifty because it's no small feat you have to earn it. It takes decades and I've had a very full life. I've had scabies hooping cough and PTSD from my feet touching the bottom of the lake at sleep away Camp I've dropped diamonds down the drain by accident I've broken numerous glass bonds one full length mirror in college and too many boundaries to count I. Once watched my car get stolen I've been bitten by my own. Dog Twice, I've only had one migraine but lots of little headaches along the way. I learned not to go to the eye doctor stoned or to Polish my nails drunk a policeman once told me he was afraid of me I've had alcoholic boyfriends psychotic pets. My goldfish wants jumped out of its bowl and both simultaneously I've had teachers I didn't listen to therapists I didn't listen to and doctors I. DIDN'T LISTEN TO I've gone down hopeless essential rabbit holes rendering my whole existence meaningless and loop back around again, it's a lot to celebrate. The funny thing is that fifty is neither young nor old it's young to a seventy five year old and old to a twenty, five year old. But at least you're not waiting for it anymore. The best thing about turning fifty is that you're no longer forty nine, which is the next worst thing to being fifty. Once you turn forty nine, the countdown is on and the whole year is wasted with anticipation anxiety and dread forty nine shouldn't even be an age just like there are no thirteenth floors just get rid of it wine me. Dine me forty nine me. No. Thanks. If you're lucky enough to make it to fifty, you should at least give yourself credit for hitting the milestone. You should appreciate your life and the fact that you didn't ot fall off a junkie roller coaster or get swallowed whole by a snake like they do in Indonesia I. Am truly grateful for those things I'm also proud of myself for not giving up because there's so much look forward to the movies. I won't see the meals I won't cook and all the man I still won't go out with. At the very least I can be an example for younger women, a powerful role model to trembling forty nine year olds everywhere, and despite my best efforts to the contrary I have evolved for example, in nineteen seventy eight. Wednesday addams was my role model in Nineteen Ninety Madonna was my role model and today is my role model well, a and Jane Fonda and would Jane Fonda being eighty two and a being eighty five I think I've chosen wisely. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at. Kris K. K. Aria on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website www dot Chris kepler dot com..

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"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

06:30 min | Last month

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Hi I'm Chris Kepler and welcome to does this happen to you? I'm an actor voice actor audiobook narrator and writer. I love telling sharing stories about the strange experiences, my friends that I have while doing mundane things like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies, a micro audio book about life in befuddle men just for you. Our story this week is from. Carlin. Betcha who you'll find on medium DOT COM and at her website Carlin Betcha. Dot Com and here is a love letter to short men. Your height is not an issue unless you make it one. It's one of the most common openers I see on dating apps a man's height. It's usually the first thing men list and sometimes height is the only thing listed. Yep just height nothing else as if those two numbers measured in feet and inches contain multitudes. I understand why it happens. We are a society obsessed with looks we treat beauty and both genders as a currency attractive people make more money are viewed as more agreeable and somehow more valuable. This is part of the halo effect, a psychology term where we assign one single trait beauty to other characteristics kindness. Personally I have never seen a woman who cares about height in fact, I find short men hot, not all of them but many. Let. Me Tell you a not hot short man's story. I recently wanted to date with a five foot five inch guy within fifteen minutes of our meeting. He ass is my height a problem. It was not until he mentioned it. I had not even looked at the height he listed on his profile. I then spent the next twenty minutes assuaging his fragile ego and explaining why many women like short men it was exhausting at one point I think he read the weariness in my slumped shoulders and tried to self correct. I'm only asking because you're right about love and sex. Sure if you went on a date with a dermatologist, would you ask her to examine the fungus between your toes? I didn't say that, but I wanted to my sarcasm is a feral beast. Then, there are the many many short guys who lie about their height. You know who you are. I once went on a date with a guy claiming to be five foot eight inches. He was five foot four inches. That's a four inch lie. If we're keeping track I wore three inch heels for that date that put me at five feet eight inches. Greeted him with a hug. This was pre pandemic days his head landed on my chest. Awkward. For most women height is not a deal breaker but lying is So. Here it is short men the painful truth your height is not the Lady Boehner killer. You think it is it your lack of confidence that makes women's ovaries shrivel up and never want to go on another date again, I have dated a lot of sexy short men and they all had one thing in common nothing to prove when Tom Cruise five foot seven inches was sexiest man alive multiple times. Did anyone add a footnote sexy for a short Guy Hell? No. When Bruno Mars five, foot five inches shakes what his momma gave him are women getting out there measuring. Sticks Adriano. then. There's Napoleon. Napoleon. Never had complex about his height nor was he even really that short you can feel his confidence oozing out of the impatient love letters. He wrote to Josephine one read a kiss on your heart and one much lower down much lower. Nowhere in that letter, will you find a postscript saying unless my height makes you not in the mood? Yet Napoleon somehow got his name attached to the height inferiority complex known as the Napoleon. Complex. The Napoleon Complex states that short men tend to be more aggressive lie more and try to compensate for their short stature by being exceptionally cruel. But researchers found the opposite to be true. One study from Nyu phone short men are thirty two percent less likely to divorce than tolman. The study also found women married to short men reported greater happiness and short men did more housework than tolman. Yes. There is a correlation between happiness and a freshly floor. Clearly short men are doing something, right? I pulled over twenty of my most dateable girlfriends for this article I asked the same question. Are you attracted to short men most had similar answer? It depends on the guy that's a nice way of saying that is not the package. It's the meat inside. So please short men everywhere are just as sexy as the Togoi and in many cases more so because you know what you have to. CanNot be measured in inches and feet. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website www dot Chris kepler dot com..

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"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

06:43 min | 2 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Hi. I'm Chris. Kepler, and welcome to does this happen to you. I'm an actor voice actor audiobook narrator and writer I love telling and sharing stories about the strange experiences, my friends and I have while doing mundane like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies, a micro audio book about life in befuddle men just for you. Our story this week is from BB, Nicholson who you'll find on medium DOT COM and here is. Why my mother has two phones and why it's driving me crazy. My mother lives with me. She is one hundred and one, and she is as attached to her telephone as a phone addicted teenager. Where's my phone? She asked every thirty minutes when she first moved in which led to a massive search that involve digging through the crevices of her recliner shaking out the blanket that covers your lap groping under her chair rippling through the overflowing contents of her Walker and delving into the pockets of pants, which is usually where we found it. It isn't a smartphone and she doesn't use the camera figure. She doesn't use any features for that matter. She has a flip phone. All she needs to do is flip it open to answer which is sufficient for the ten to fifteen calls. She gets every day he yes you heard me right she gets ten or fifteen calls a day. Sometimes she talks for several minutes laughing answering questions and ending the conversation with I. Love You too when she hangs up and I asked her who it was. She says I have no idea. She got a call the other day from a stranger who said, do you WANNA prayer today? She hung up on them My brother and sister called several times a day just to check up on her and their favorite topic of conversation is food. What did you have for lunch? That's sounds good. What's for dinner? I don't know what bb is cooking, but I guess I'll have to eat it whatever it is. Mama's phone is her lifeline to the outside world even when she doesn't know who's calling or even if they only talk about food. But two phones are one phone too many. By now you're probably wondering why she has to phones and this is where I need to confess. She used to have one phone and I accidentally washed it. I sent it through the washing machine when I put in an armload of clothes and the phone came out laundered and dead my brother and sister told me to immerse the phone in rice which I did but it didn't work phones don't often survive a trip through the washing machine. My mother is on my brother's family phone plan and when I told him, I washed it, he said he would get her another one in the meantime. She couldn't go phone homeless try taking the phone away from your teenager and you will know what I'm talking about. So I got her a track phone from Walmart called the relatives and friends who are responsible for her ten or fifteen calls a day and gave them the new number. Mama was happy again, five weeks later, my brothers new phone arrived I called family and friends again and told them to switch back to the old number. This sounds like a simple thing to do. But it isn't her relatives and friends are a decade or two younger than she is, which means they are in their eighties and nineties some of them don't here. Well, some of them don't process well and none of them understand why a woman who is one hundred and one has to phone numbers into months. But we finally got it straightened out. Everything was fine for a few weeks until something terrible happened. I washed her phone again. I had been checking her pockets carefully before every wash until I didn't. So after ruining her new phone I reactivated her track phone only this time around I ordered a phone pouch on a lanyard she tied the pouch to her Walker and her phone dangles in front of her all day. There is no chance I will wash a phone in a pouch on a lanyard tied to a walker. I had to call those same friends and relatives and tell them her number had changed again, which confused them but I finally got the message across and they began using her track phone number. Then my brother sent her another phone because she's on his family plan. Now. You've got to call everybody and tell them her number is changed again smirked my sister who was visiting when the new phone arrived. It's not going to happen. I can't deal with it I said, and that's why my mother has two phones. They both fit in phone pouch and she gets to decide which one to answer when somebody calls. It's a bit of a challenge. She already thinks she's getting a phone call whenever the phone rings on television. That was the phone on TV Mama. You didn't get a call I tell her from five to fifty times before she catches on and puts her phones back in the pouch. Sometimes, she answers the wrong phone, and by the time she gets to the other phone stopped ringing. Then I have to call back whoever it was because she can't see well enough to dial. But it's worth it if it keeps Mama happy I think there's even a proverb in the Bible about it. It's easier for a rich man to ride that camel through the eye of a needle directly into the Kingdom of Heaven then for some of us to give up our cell phone Vera Zarian. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website www dot Chris kepler dot com..

Mama Kris K. Kepler Walker befuddle writer Nicholson Kris K. K. Aria Kingdom of Heaven Walmart facebook twitter Vera Zarian
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

02:33 min | 4 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Sets in the east twice a day, so using many moons as a reference for an expensive time would be a complicated term on Mars seven. Mars has low gravity. Normally low gravity wouldn't be a bad thing. Given my current weight but I'm kind of a KLUTZ. I have a hard enough time maintaining my balanced in Earth's gravity I could see myself falling down more on Mars and in slow motion probably would make my voice slowdown to when I'm falling like Oh! Up Third. Eight Mars has ugly skies and Sun Sets One scientist on Youtube. Said Mars has blue sunsets and yellow skies. He explained it's the way. Light is scattered and refracted or redacted Blah Blah something something whatever I just don't think I'd want to exist in an Andy warhol painting. I'm sure there are other things I could find wrong with Mars, but these are enough for now I can use these excuses when I get cornered by the time share salesman at the Mars Red Rock Haven condos kiosk at best pro. There are other options I registered the other day. Some German scientists found it earth like planet orbiting in the Goldilocks zone of a sun like our own. Or was it the Mary Mary quite contrary zone anyway. That earth twice the size of our home world with the catchy name Toy Daesh for five six dot. O. Four now see that's why astronomers and asshole physicists need more English and or marketing majors in their ranks. They're never going to sell anyone on going to a planet named Toy Deja four five six dot, four in these to be suppling like Volk Ron or Velcro, ler, cash or civilised, prime with a new name. It would look more promising. However, it is three thousand light years away and I. Don't think I could spare the time to get there even with Elon Musk driving. Thanks so much for listening if you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris. K. K. Aria, twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website. WWW Chris kepler dot com..

Elon Musk Kris K. Kepler Andy warhol Mary Mary Volk Ron salesman scientist facebook twitter K. K. Aria
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

04:43 min | 5 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"The public's duty to entertain themselves. The current supply is provided mostly by old ladies. Probably no one is ever seen. Who leaves the magazines and they are loath to admit any supernatural suspicions. Will there is evidence that ghost may be responsible? It is unlikely that they would be the source as nobody enjoys being in a waiting room when they're alive let alone after death however the magazines are clearly from another place and time. No ghosts were available for comment and are less story the idiots guide to cooking dinner for a date. Congratulations somehow you've pulled a not so lucky lady and invited her round for dinner but times. Got Away from you. You've only got half an hour until she arrives. And you've got as much experience with cooking as Joseph. Frizzell has with responsible parroting. What are you going to do? Fear not my oblivious friend if you follow this advice she'll be eating out of your hand assuming you don't have a plate if you don't have a plate. I'm surprised you have your life together enough to meet girls in the first place step one scope out the kitchen. Okay First Things First. Check the kitchen for what you can use all right here. We go TATA. You've got half an onion one new potato and some Leeann parents. The only thing in the fridge some Chinese food it's so moldy it's started criticising you for walking past that charity worker without acknowledging him in a situation like this. You've got two choices. Either explained to her that you're on a new diet which requires you to give a protein vitamins and self-respect or run to the shops before they close step to realize it. Sunday in the shops closed half an hour ago. Shit step three stall for time. Why would you even plan a dinner party for Sunday? Who Does that now? You've got no choice but to stall for time. Hi Babe. How's it going? What no no. Nothing's wrong was just wondering if you could pick up some wine to go with the food. Yeah Yeah reds good. Make sure to go to the majestic though. Yeah I know the nearest one's about two hours away but I wanna make it special and the wine I've got is mostly for medical purposes. It's not even technically wine. There was a printing error on the label. Okay cool thanks Babe. Yes he soon. Bye Bye step for remember. You've got that bottle of wine begin to formulate a plan. Yeah this work. You're feeling good about it now. A bit of wine a handful of these. This is looking good step five. Kill Yourself. Eat a handful of painkillers. Wash it down with wine. If you're dead. She can't be disappointed when you haven't cooked anything lucky. You've got so many pills lying around. Why do you have so many pills again? Step six the last resort. Oh dear you're only dead inside okay. No worries looks like we'll have to use our last resort. Look there under the piles of Kleenex and that porn parody Schindler's Fist couldn't be yes. It is a takeaway menu for that place down the street step seven acceptance shuffled through the bags of rubbish near the door and take the packet from the delivery guy at least when she arrives. You'll have something for dinner now. Hopefully she likes it. You decide to try solve it before. She arrives stipulate realization. Wake up the next day. In a pool of filth your noses covered in a white powder hardened by dried sweat. You take a few moments to realize what happened. You've been high for the last two days. You hallucinated. The whole thing didn't you? You don't have to respond. I know it's the truth. It's okay I'm not even really here but I'm the only friend you've got left. Hey I know what a cheer you up. Let's watch Schindler's Fist again. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website. Www dot Chris kepler dot com..

Schindler First Things First Frizzell Leeann Kris K. Kepler charity worker TATA painkillers Joseph facebook twitter Kris K. K. Aria
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

06:54 min | 7 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Writer. I love telling and sharing stories about the strange experiences my friends and I have while doing mundane things like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies a micro audio book about life in befuddle men. Just for you our story. This week is from Linda. Latte who you'll find on medium DOT COM and here is confessions of a seventy three year. Old Woman you would think I'd have my shit together by now. Well think again holy crap. I'm seventy three. Does that make me officially old? There are some days when my boone's creek a little bit or I am more tired than I think. I should be occasionally I give into it and I take a nap. Those are the days. My husband starts tiptoeing around me. I May Have Seen Him Flinch at timer. To sometimes he will suggest that I should indeed take a nap. Then he quietly disappears. Those are the days when I deserve the name Bitch. Thankfully he is not the name calling kind. I have now entered the time zone of what the heck of I done with my life. To be honest I am rather disappointed. Reflection is not all it's rated to be. As a matter of fact I do not like it. I thought there would be so much time and that I would be relaxed and content. I must confess as I was stumbling through my life. I knew I was failing miserably at times. I wanted to get off the merry go round but I could not make myself jump. The problem is I have drifted through much of my life. Does that sound familiar? Isn't that what so many people say as they grow? Old Darn it. I don't want to be normal. I don't want to sound like everyone else. I don't want to make so many mistakes. There were times in my life when I was so structured and worked so hard to achieve my goals you know the goals the ones most. Everyone has be successful. Make Money Blah Blah Blah. I did that but I never made a plan for one. I was older. I was too busy trying to survive. I totally sucked at relationships. I avoided it for a while. Not sure why. Exactly the nineteen seventies. That was when you married early and started your family. I was already behind schedule and I'm still not sure I was ready for marriage. I did want children and it was a big fat. No no to be pregnant and not be married so is settled. I remember talking to a girlfriend and telling her I wanted kids and the first nice guy who came along. I was going to marry crap. That was stupid and it was a mistake. I did get exactly the children I wanted and blessed to have the husband not so much he was and is a nice guy. There is no way I should have married him. We were not a good match. We were married for fourteen years. He is now my ex and I am thankful that there was not more damage to all involved in that relationship. We made it out OK. Their relationships I had after that were excruciatingly awful. Have you ever felt you punishing yourself? I have and I think I did. I felt guilty. Can you believe it back then? Divorce was not really acceptable. Either you made your bed and you darn well better stay in it so stupid so I drifted a little bit. Nothing felt right. No one was a good fit. I almost married one of them. I could puke now thinking about it. It seemed that each relationship became worse. The last one before my now husband was a demon. You know the kind the ones who can't stand themselves so they spew out hate toward everyone in their path. Yep I stoop that low the worst part of my three relationships with the amount of time and effort. I put into them ladies. Listen up do not do that. You have to value yourself because no one else will unless you do. I you cannot fix broken. Do not try the only one you will hurt is yourself now. I married to the man that was my high school love. We were supposed to be married right after I graduated but life gun in the way he was in his first year of college and then Vietnam happened. He enlisted went there for two tours and our relationship and I have often looked back and wondered if that is why I waited so long to Mary so I could have a family shit. You can't go back. Does anyone ever understand life? I'm seventy three and I do not have a clue here. I am and I think about what I could have done differently throughout my life thus far the only thing I'm grateful for is my children I would not trade them for anything the rest of it. I would like to change. But where do you start I am looking at the past with is that are in the present? Everything is different now. Is like looking at life through a filter. Am I making better decisions now? I can only say I hope so. Most of the time. I doubt that every decision I make affect someone else. I try to be aware of everyone's feelings but I'm also trying to be fair to myself to. It is a delicate balance one. I wish I understood better. Do I have any advice? No I wish I did. The Best I can say is that life is a dance so pay extra attention to the steps. You take if you make a mistake. Learn from it. Do Not Invest too much time in it. Let it go and move on when you come to a decision apply. Much thought a tablespoon of common sense and a hefty dose of love above all else respect and. Love Yourself. I you are the one in control even when you do not think so. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website. Www dot Chris kepler dot com..

befuddle boone Linda Writer. Kris K. Kepler Kris K. K. Aria facebook twitter Vietnam Mary
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

02:53 min | 8 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Does he really think I have nothing better to do on a Thursday night? Then sit in traffic on the four zero five. When am I supposed to sleep? Depression there are two types of depression associated with online dating while over forty. The first one is a reaction to the reality that these losers aren't interested in you either and by extension the reality that yeah you really might die alone. Sadness and regret predominate. This type of depression. You worry about the cost of home healthcare workers. And whether you'll be lonely when you outlive all your friends and pets. Is it ethical to get a pet when I'm eighty you wonder? What if they outlive me? You worry that everything was supposed to be completely fucking different and somehow inexplicably. It isn't this. Phase may be made easier bulloch knowledge that in the end. We all die alone married or not. The second type of depression is more subtle and more private. It is your quiet preparation for being single forever. You Make Your Sofa even more comfortable and subscribed to Amazon Prime Netflix. And Hulu while still keeping your cable see you can watch Bravo because fuck it. There is no one to impress and there never will be you. Buy A box of Ocho chocolate peanut butter bars and allow yourself one every night you eat carbs in public you go to bed at nine. Acceptance reaching this stage of dating online after forty is a gift. This phase is marked by a calm sense of withdrawal. It is peaceful you delete the APP. You buy some herbs for Your Garden and spend all day Sunday planting them talking to the dog and making a huge pot of Spaghetti with plain tomato sauce. You talk to your favorite cousin on the phone and laugh and realize wait a second. I'm happy you regain your dignity and grace you limit your social interaction to people you actually like and come to the realization that brunch food is awful and always has been but to get to this place you had to go through all the stages of online dating there are no shortcuts to coping with this deeply personal and unique experience. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website. Www dot Chris kepler dot com..

Depression Kris K. Kepler Kris K. K. Aria Amazon Hulu facebook twitter Bravo
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

05:52 min | 10 months ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Unfortunately when I responded sure she look directly at me and winked. I pondered what I thought I had just seen and convinced myself that it did not happen. shortly thereafter a foot was caressing my inner left calf I pan the table double Maggie and Anita were too far away Brad. While still having the stupid half grin on his face was decidedly straight and he was just a few playing cards over five feet tall. There was no way his like could reach if he wanted to. I contemplated turning to. Oh my God. Bunny Buddy Lee threw up a little in my mouth which caused me to breathe through my nose. Yeah not good. That left Angelina who who is now looking at me. I glanced at her. She awkwardly licked her lips like a five year old who had terribly chapped lips and and was outwardly and violently ignoring all pleas for him to stop licking them you. It felt as though I was caught between disgust at an achey place with a slobbering Angelina across for me and a splayed out. Oh my God my only avenue to try to get away from her. I contemplated simply standing up and leaving but I had only just arrived and that would have appeared appeared odd at best before it can think of another option the bottle of wine I ordered arrived and being anointed wine guy at the table require that I stay and drink it after I approved the wine. The server poured a full glass and left to attend to her other tables and which point Angelina slowly slid her empty glass toward me for me to fill it as well. The action was accompanied need unfortunately with a bizarre look on her face given the under the table action. I assume it was meant to be alluring but it was closer to being psychotic or desperate attempt to delicately released. Some intestinal gas do so high porter. Some wine which as anticipated was quite nice floral and vegetal with Cherry rose petals and just a a touch of bell pepper initially a bit linear but fold by more fruit and a bit of intrigue speaking of Intrigue. Unfortunately the leg tangle underneath the table had stopped at least momentarily but the conundrum still existed my choices start up a conversation conversation with the foot masseuse or her lobotomize roommate or remain silent. Keep my head down and drink myself into oblivion. VN option three after plowing through half of the bottle. The foot was once again back powered by about three hundred mils of liquid courage. I got up and made my way inside the restaurant to the men's room. High just needed to get away from the table and breathe through my nose again. As I opened the door to leave my newfound little sanctuary brad was waiting outside. Had He seen what was going on under the table. Was this going to be some sort of confrontation. I wasn't worried. The Guy was five foot. Two in cycling shoes weighed about ninety three pounds and purportedly had dried snot on his face. So yeah he was an adult in a fourth graders body. I was pretty sure I could take him. He was still still sporting the stupid little grin. No so I figured it was something else he started right in Angelina said she would have sex with me. Me Trying to feel excited for him but knowing it would likely be the worst thirty seven seconds of his life. Oh that's great. I almost almost ask him. Why the sudden turnaround but I stopped realizing the less I knew the better I would sleep but he went on? She said she she would do it. Under one condition not wanting to hear the rest I started peering through the window at our table. Oh my God was standing on the bench. Both hands raised looking as if he were about to make a toast. He reached down for his beer which caused him to lose his balance as he struggled to remain upright. He bumped the table causing my bottle of wine to teeter and then fall to its side and then roll out onto the floor. Ed Precisely that moment zoe the former current love of my life who apparently was working after all all wish avoiding me. The little minx was passing our table with a tray of food. She tried to pivot to avoid the falling bottle. But this caused turn to lose her balance which sent her trayful of food crashing onto an adjacent table. And it's to patrons before I could even even gasp bread. Had One more thing to say she said she would only have sex with me if you joined in and made it a threesome. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K. K. Aria area on twitter or Kris K. Kepler on facebook or check out my website W._w._w.. Dot Chris Kepler DOT COM..

Angelina Brad Buddy Lee Chris Kepler Maggie Kris K. Kepler Kris K. K. Aria Anita facebook twitter zoe
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

09:32 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Might i'm chris keppler and welcome to disease happen to you. Oh i'm an actor voice actor audiobook narrator and writer. I love tilling and sharing stories about the strange experiences. My friends and i have well well doing mundane things like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies a micro audio book about life in befuddle men just for you our story. This week is from nikki kaye. Who you'll find on medium dot com tom and here is i accidentally got drunk at the doctor's office. It only hit me as i was driving home. I was sixteen eighteen years old. I had my own car a little boxy nineteen eighty five four door. I'd bought from cousin for two hundred and fifty bucks. It had a c._d. C._d. player installed in the daesh. A pack of cigarettes tucked into the sun visor and a checkbook and the glove box. I had a pocketful of waitressing money not a pager with half a dozen interchangeable cases and a boyfriend who is teaching me spanish. I was headed to college soon. Life was mostly going my way. It didn't feel so great. Though when i was doubled over from the stabbing pain in my abdomen it had been going on intermittently unpredictably for months and i tried everything i take in psych meds and aunt acids. I'd had an upper endoscopy and a gastric emptying study. Nothing seemed to be the problem. The doctor suspected maybe had some mild reflux but in order to confirm. I needed to undergo something. He called a ph probe study. It sounded innocent enough. A probe was sent up the nose and swallow down the esophagus. It sat there for a day monitoring the area just above the stomach opening to see if acid was backing up through the spink muscle and then the next day it was removed and the results were analyzed sign me up. I said i was desperate for some answers. When i arrived at the doctor's office on on the morning of the appointment my mother was already sitting in the waiting room. It was seven o'clock and the place was deserted. There were no other patients. No receptionist not even any doctors. My mom needed to sign the consent for me but she needed to be at work early. So we'd both driven our own cars and mom would go to work work while i drove back home no big deal. The nurse introduced herself with a smile nothing to eat or drink after midnight. She asked me. I nodded it. Okay very good. She said and handed my mother and me. Each clipboard clipped onto mine was a four page intake form while moms uh-huh had a simple one line consent form essentially a permission slip for the simple procedure that was to follow she signed and then hugged me goodbye. I leaving me to fill out the rest of the redundant and exhausting forms. There should really be a computer system for this. I thought trying to keep my eyes from glazing glazing over when the nurse took me into the room. She first asked me to drink the contents of small plastic cup. This is the same stuff that the dentist gives you to number mouth before giving you a feeling she explained novacaine. I ask light o'kane. Actually she corrected directed in your throat. So it's more comfortable. I nodded and then shrugged knocking back the foul tasting liquid after a few minutes the nurses i was ready to begin. She answered the probe up through my nose and i could feel it sliding backwards and then curving around down the back of my throat. She gave me a glass of water water and asked me to drink it as she maneuvered the probe into position. The swallowing helps it go down. She said i thought i was doing doing well until appropriate. Just the right spot and hurt the lighter. Cain water came right back up all over that sweet nurses lap. Maybe some more or light cane i offered and maybe we'll just keep the trash can close by. She responded with a tight smile. We tried twice more each time after a gulp of light arcane and a five minute wait each time the probe got to my epa gladys and my gag reflex like said new thanks eventually we threw in the towel the figurative one and also the little one the nurse had given me to cover my lap. I left disappointed but not much worse for the wear. She'd had it worse than i had for sure. I buckled into my twelve year old car and pulled out of the a parking lot. The office was in the city and it was rush hour. I wasn't used to driving on the highway especially this far south but i was a good and conscientious consciencious young driver and i wasn't worried i turn my head over my left shoulder merge onto the highway and caught a glimpse of a seventy mile per hour tractor trailer coming coming towards me. Just before everything went black. I swung my head back ford and blinked nothing. I took my foot off the gas hoping to actually i don't know what i hope to accomplish not to get hit by a tractor trailer going seventy miles per hour guess i- angled the car to what i judged to be a safe line as my vision gradually came back and somehow i safely merged behind the big truck my fingernails dug into my poems homes around the steering wheel. I took a few depress trying to figure out what to do next. My eyesight cleared mercifully but all it revealed was a sea of cars all traveling nearly bumper to bumper at highway speeds. There was no shoulder pull onto. I had no way to call for help. Nope even if i did pull over fat lot of good my pager did me with all its translucent colors with the infinite wisdom of a sixteen year old. I decided i needed to just stay the course and refrain from making any sudden moves it was still a long drive home and i stayed in the right lane cruising cruising along just at the speed limit using all my strength to hold my eyes opened. Keep my eyes straight ahead. I took note of the exit signs as they came up up each and indicator that i was getting closer to home without catastrophe. It was these curious white on green signs which gave me yet another another indication that though i was still conscious i was most definitely not okay. Each time i read an exits name i would burst out uncontrollable giggles at the curiosity of the word parvin. I said to myself par van the clerk almo. I said in a deep movie announcer voice like homo clay co lo oh. When did the xs around here. It's so weird is ahead. I reminded myself but then i saw a new sign pleasant valley i saying oh that's the soothing name pleasant hey nikki. I think you're drunk said a voice from somewhere inside my head. I never been drunk before. Never even had an alcoholic beverage before has a matter of fact and of course as an unaccompanied driver with no oh so phone. I was unable to confirm my suspicion my best guest though was that drinking so much lighter kane on an empty stomach had gotten to my head head once again i judged that the best thing to do would be to just keep deriving north and get home as quickly and safely as possible especially now that i was in familiar territory i gave myself a figurative slap in the face and kept my opinions to myself for the rest of the ride which which became easier as the exit turned from unusual words to rural highway numbers with exception of quick chuckle when i got to sixty nine highway. I managed to make it to the house in one piece. I called my mother from our landline to let her know i'd gotten home and that i hadn't gotten the probe and that the nurse i had inadvertently got me wasted before driving me home. We laughed about it dismissing it as a curious incident for reasons. I can't fathom adam. We didn't notify anyone about what had happened. We had nearly forgotten about the incident and my ill advised choices. Along the way when an envelope derived from the doctor's office inside was the check. My mother had left for the ten dollar co-pay since i never ended up getting the probe. They never cashed to check to this day. I contend that they should have given the ten dollars and then some sweet patient nurse for her trouble. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at kris k. k. aria on twitter order or kris k. kepler on facebook or check out my website w._w._w. Dot chris kepler dot com..

nikki kaye befuddle chris keppler writer reflux Dot kris k. kepler Cain facebook twitter kris k. sixteen eighteen years sixteen year five minute ten dollars twelve year ten dollar
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

02:00 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Stores is the dress code you could walk into a Lowe's painted with dried, mud and grass and nobody would care the dirtier you look the more yard work, you're doing, which means the more shit, you're going to buy now. Try doing that at Applebee's they almost certainly ask you to leave unless it's one of those that struggling because millennials ruined everything now mos- it could work. They just shout. Welcome to mos- and you could respond been doing yard work with my baby. Daddy, mother fuckers gimme or two best burritos. And the manager was say get as crazy bitch. A burrito recently. I also made my first trip to bed, bath and beyond. We finally have enough plates and glasses and things that we need a way to organize them most of my life. I've gotten by with a couple of plates, a couple of forks Abol, no dishwasher, no laundry machine. We have so many spatulas and knives. Now. We had to buy us Spinney thing for them all a special thing to hold your other things. It's a slogan for the middle class. I didn't exactly plan on making it here. But I did. And after all, someone's got to wrangle the weeds on this property until the day civilization ends, and we'd take over managing along. Sounds like a futile gesture to part of me. Then again, you can make almost anything sound that way. Why brush your hair if you're eventually going to die, but you do it anyway? You do it. So that maybe one day you can put a little firepit out there in roast marshmallows, because what else are you going to do with your life? But live it. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris. K K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook or check out my website, WWW dot Chris, Kepler dot com..

Kris K Kepler Applebee forks Abol Spinney Twitter Facebook one day
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

01:58 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"You could walk into a Lowe's painted with dried, mud and grass, and nobody would care the dirtier you look, the more yard work, you're doing, which means the more shit, you're going to buy now. Try doing that at Applebee's they almost certainly ask you to leave unless it's one of those that struggling because millennials ruined everything now mos- it could work. They just shout. Welcome to mos- and you could respond been doing yard work with my baby daddy motherfuckers, gimme or two best burritos. And the manager was say get as crazy bitch a burrito recently. I also made my first trip to bed, bath and beyond. We finally have enough plates and glasses and things that we need a way to organize them most of my life. I've gotten by with a couple of plates, a couple of forks Abol, no dishwasher, no laundry machine. We have so many spatulas and knives. Now. We had to buy a Spinney thing for them all a special thing to hold your other things. It's a slogan for the middle class. I didn't exactly plan on making it here. But I did. And after all, someone's got to wrangle the weeds on this property until the day civilization ends, and we'd take over managing lawn. Sounds like a futile. Gesture to part of me. Then again, you can make almost anything sound that way. Why brush your hair if you're eventually going to die, but you do it anyway? You do it. So that maybe one day you can put a little firepit out there in roast marshmallows, because what else are you going to do with your life? But live it. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris. K K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook or check out my website, WWW dot Chris, Kepler dot com..

Kris K Kepler Applebee forks Abol Spinney Twitter Facebook one day
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

09:24 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Hi, I'm Chris Kepler and welcome to does this happen to you. I'm an actor voice. Actor audiobook, narrator and writer. I love telling and sharing stories about the strange experiences my friends, and I have while doing mundane things like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies a micro audio book about life in befuddle, befuddling just for you. Our story today is by Jillian Sisli who you'll find on medium dot com. And here is I didn't want this rescue dog. Now he eats, my food and hides my socks. He was unwanted by the world. We took him in to give him the life, he deserved dogs are wonderful creatures. I've had a dog in my life ever since I was born other than the few months of mourning between the passing of one pet to the welcoming of another. And what's not to love for one dogs make for great vacuums. Oops, did I just drop a carrot sliver? No bother here comes the living Hoover to zoom in and out like a well-paid unseen made. I've been talking to myself quite a lot today. Is there something wrong with me? That's not a problem. I'll just direct my dialogue to this. Fluffy. Lump napping by my desk, and feel better about myself. It's been awhile since I've been to the gym. Oh, wait. But I have walked. Doug everyday for the last week. So that's okay. I don't feel as bad for being a suburban hermit writer. See dogs come in handy, there, plenty of upsides, and while the white fluffy furball lying next to my desk is now like a child to me. I didn't ask for him. I didn't even want him my partner, and I weren't ready for a dog we had plans to travel for a year down the road, and the logistic side of having a dog was simply too difficult. We quite responsibly so contained our dog fever, like having baby fever, but for dogs and continued forward with life, one day soon, we would say soon would come much sooner than we anticipated. We saw the beginning of the end from the very beginning, when my fiance's family member, originally told us, she was getting a dog. We both told her it was a bad idea. We told her that she. I had no clue. How much work it would take. We told her she wasn't prepared for the commitment because we knew her. And we knew the dog was just going to be a living thing to curb her loneliness until another man came along to shower her with affection. We begged her to give it twelve months to consider, whether she was ready for fifteen plus year commitment of taking care of another living thing that said, we weren't it also prized win, only a few weeks later and eight week old sheet sue was snuggled into her side, like a childhood stuffed animal. He was named Berkeley. It was even less of a surprise, when this family member started a new relationship less than a year later and began to resent, her furry little friend, what a nuisance that he had to be fed and bathed and needed new P pads put out for him every single day because she refused to take him out. Outside multiple times a day to go to the bathroom. Particularly not in the wintertime when it was just too cold and walking him. Well to be honest that didn't happen all that much, if she wanted to sleep over at her boyfriend's place. Well, my fiance got a call to drop by and feed the dog if she was headed out of the province to spend a weekend with her boyfriend guests who got the call. Yeah. I'm sure you see where this is going. The family member decided she's going to move a few provinces away to be with her boyfriend fulltime. She makes a joke of gifting us the dog as an engagement gift were not laughing. We can't afford a dog right now. We can barely afford our mortgage. My fiance tells her firmly you're taking him with you, when you move right? Oh, yes. Of course I can't imagine leaving him behind. I prophesized to my fiance, an hour later in. By saying you just wait. She's going to dump that damn dog on us. No, he began brushing the off. She wouldn't do that a week later won a call with her, she's on speakerphone when she says that they found a new apartment to live in together for her and her boyfriend. I look at my fiance with panicked is he doesn't understand why I start, frankly pointing at the cell phone and flailing, my arms, like a lunatic, so that I could prepare him for the atomic bomb. I knew she was about to drop on us. He still doesn't understand what I'm trying to communicate in time to prepare himself his fault. I kill it at trades, every party, we go to. She takes breath and tries to deliver the news rather. Flippantly only problem is the apartment isn't pet friendly. My fiance looks at me. I nod knowingly like a wise, Jedi, I tried to tell him after all. I could hear this coming from a mile away, he clears his throat. But then what are you going to do with the dog? She seems distracted as she's talking to us as, if she's not discussing the uncertain future of a precious creature, but rather what she's playing to have for dinner that night. I don't know probably just post an ad for him on could G G Craig's list, or something. A dog is a massive responsibility. One should not take on lightly. We knew we couldn't afford to take in a dog. Not with my fiance's uncertain employment relatives at the time, not with a mortgage and wedding to save up for a car payment to worry about. We couldn't afford to take him, but we did anyway, because at the end of the day, that's the kind of people we are we knew we would regret not taking him in. We would be ridden with guilt, if we never knew what came of him, we couldn't stomach the thought of him being sold to some strangers on the internet. He hadn't done anything wrong. He didn't deserve to be abandoned the trauma of being tossed aside. Mayan owner would already take such a toll on him. At least the damage could be petted, if he landed on the doorstep of someone familiar, he deserves the chance to have a high quality life, every dog cat. At pet or otherwise does. And so for these last eight months, I've been mom to a high maintenance, sheet soon named Berkeley with his massive under bite and his dopey face. And so life goes on taking in this dog wasn't sunshine and rainbows quite the opposite here. Rive to us with massive behavioral issues and an absolute lack of socialization. I saw plenty of psychological trauma, in him a combination of being abandoned, and as well being cooped up in that two bedroom condo for the entire first year and a half of his life. It's been a lot of work and money to get him to a place where he can function in the world without being a danger to it for a few months after he arrived. I resented my fiance's family member for dropping her on one creature on our doorstep. Then one day, it just became the way it was we accepted it. He. Came family to us when that family member comes to visit, she still refers to herself, as Berkeley's mom my fake smile twitches, when she says this as I resist the urge to tell her that she lost the right to call herself his mama, when she completely abandoned him the other day that same family member was telling us how incredibly happy, she is with her boyfriend. They're still together and that's a big deal. It's true. We can see it. We've never seen her this happy were sincerely, please. She's found this joiner life. We're ready to start our life together and settled down. We nod showing our support of this endeavor. We've even talked about getting a dog someday. My partner and I glanced briefly at each other, we looked back at her utter. Silence hangs in the air, I remain quiet saying silent per and hoping that day never comes because we definitely can't afford to. Support two dogs on our current income. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris. K K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook or check out my website, WWW dot Chris, Kepler dot com..

writer partner Chris Kepler Berkeley Jillian Sisli befuddle fever Kris K Kepler Twitter Doug Facebook one day twelve months eight months eight week
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

06:04 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Hi, I'm Chris Kepler and welcome to does this happen to you. I'm an actor voice. Actor audiobook, narrator and writer. I love telling and sharing stories about the strange experiences my friends, and I have while doing mundane things like grocery shopping. That's why this podcast features funny stories from fantastic writers about our daily anomalies a micro audio book about life in befuddle befuddling just for you this week. We have a story by Andrew not who you'll find on medium dot com and here is LEGO club with one year old, a hot new fitness trend. If you're looking to shake up your fitness regimen this summer, I can't recommend LEGO club highly enough. That's right. Skip the gym step off the treadmill get out of the pool and head over to you. Your local public library this summer. Once you get there. It's easy. Oh, you have to do is consult, the activity schedule locate, the correct room when you arrive at the appointed time and bring along a one year old this last part is key. If you don't have a one year old handy. Just let me know I be happy to lend you mine on our first trip to LEGO club. We arrived at the library, and promptly loitered around in the kids section hoping to overhear something about LEGO club after only ten minutes of waiting, boom, a boy, s the children's librarian, if LEGO club was meeting today. She said, yes, it's downstairs. We headed downstairs, and then back up the stairs. So we could use the elevator and then back up the stairs again because the one year old got loose and made a break for it. This is what you call for shadowing. Lego club meets in a large room with three rows of tables in the middle and chairs lining. The walls, the middle table has been brimming with tiny LEGO pieces organized by color, the surrounding tables had thin flat LEGO squares to serve as basis for the LEGO creations. The challenge was to build something spooky. There were no further instructions or guidance the person in charge, just told us to have at it, as we approached the LEGO table, the one year old caught sight of the rows of nearly overflowing bins and nearly levitated out of sheer delight this was her moment. I could tell she was picturing herself grabbing the bins, one by one and slowly pouring them on her head until she was buried beneath a rainbow LEGO pile and Hance my our long workout began LEGO club with a one year old is pretty much. Same as cross fit full disclosure. I don't know what cross fit is there is even music, not loud, pulsing music though. Because, you know, library, the soundtrack is a bit more understated and Lenzi certain ambiance to the chasing lifting and panicked hand grabbing the first rule of LEGO club is that you never take your eyes off the one year old, even if you have to help out with LEGO collection or spooky project design one. I must stay trained on the wrecking ball. The sudden sprints you'll will have to do to interceptor from destroying a stranger child's terrible LEGO creation or stop her from creating a LEGO mountain on the floor will build your exceleron and work, your quads, the second rule of LEGO club is that you never take your eyes off the one year old when she wonders out the door into the lobby one thousand times you have to. Follow her. Every time, of course if you let her make it to the stairs, a couple times in addition to getting your cardio in, you can do some calf raises as you follow behind her. The third rule of LEGO club is that you never take your eyes off the one year old most of your workout will be less exciting. You will spend, it zigzagging around the room dodging, children and adults who don't acknowledge your existence. Thankfully, this isn't a complaint at all. Subtly deflecting. Inquisitive hands and redirecting them towards less destructive tests, this will build up your endurance agility, and ability to tolerate extreme boredom the last rule of LEGO club is that you never take your eyes off the one year old lest your upper body, get jealous of all the exercise your legs and cardiovascular system have been getting. There is also a lot of lifting think of it as walk. Walking Dead lifts where the item being lifted is very Wrigley and easily angered your biceps and back will be screaming for mercy by the time you're done. I am have to report that it did not break any of the LEGO club. Rules, also I signed up for an iron man triathlon on the way home, LEGO club meets once a month. So I should be ready to do. Whatever it is that our man triathletes do by the fall. Are you ready to build a better body? It's LEGO club time. Let's do this. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris. K K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook or check out my website, WWW dot Chris, Kepler dot com.

Wrigley Chris Kepler befuddle befuddling writer Kris K Kepler Twitter Andrew Lenzi Facebook one year ten minutes
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

06:24 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Everything from labor and delivery. To childcare food clothing shoes illness haircuts diapers. Sports video games and probably even a Jurassic Park Jeep Wrangler or Barbies ultra dream house. But there's one major cost. That's never ever factored in you. Never hear the experts mentioned costs incurred from the destruction of your home. Kids are a force that once unleashed have the capacity to annihilate anything in their path. I don't remember when I first noticed the insanely expensive increase in home repair costs. But it must have occurred around the time my children move from infancy to mobility shortly. After my daughter could walk. She became an artist. She was supposed to be tucked in and sound sleep following thirty bedtime stories. But instead she got hold of my sharpies and produced a mural that spanned the entirety of. Bedroom. The next morning smiley faces unicorns and dinosaurs pranced across the canvas walls as she smudged with the residue of her efforts grin. Proudly it took many many coats of paint to a race all remnants of her artistic endeavors, but at least sharpies weren't as bad as my granddaughter's material of choice, we revisiting my son and his family when his wife charged downstairs shouting, Emma has smeared poop all over her walls. Are you sure it isn't chocolate? I ask. Hopefully, no, definitely pope. I went upstairs to see for myself, but stopped short at the door without going in. It was poop. This took a lot of washing and bleaching in addition to a new coat of paint. But the worst art is the kind neither Clorox nor paint can conceal my grandson. Son's decision to use a ballpoint pen to etch his creative work into our flat screen. TV is forever. Etched in my memory following the damage, we move the TV to the workout room where it is an ongoing reminder of the downside of turning your back on a toddler artistic pursuits, aren't the only culprits adding to unmentioned home repair costs. There was the chin up bar. My boys decided to nail into their bathroom wall. When they tested it down came at bar sheet rock and all before that they blew up the microwave warming McDonald's French fries, ten minutes on high. And there was the time. One of them rubbed a rock across the dining room table to see if it was hard as diamond when they were too old to play with rocks. One son. I forget which one back to car into the garage door. Lest you think my kid's in grandkid. Kids are hooligans. I'll share a couple of stories from outside the family unit. I was having dinner with a friend and the table was set with her best China until she pulled up plastic forks. I must have looked surprised because she said, oh, I didn't mean to use plastic replacing the forks with nice cutlery. She added I forgot it's just us. Grownups tonight. I make the grandkids use plastic because they throw my silverware away. Your grandkids throw your silverware away. I repeated baffled. Yes. I was missing forks. Then I noticed the four year old dropping forks in the trash better than putting civil war down the garbage disposal. I guess which reminded me of the time. My grandson asked what would happen if he tossed a penny in the garbage disposal. Don't do it. My husband warned, but I'm sure you can guess what happened next in response to my friends cutlery. Explanation, another friend. Chime didn't and said throwing forks in the trashes nothing. You know that big glass MIR that covers one wall of our exercise room. What are the kids hurled a shoe and cracked it? You can see from this brief recital of child. Rearing highlights that kids are expensive in more ways than experts give them credit for. So if you're a parent or a grandparent Batten down the hatches and prepare for the unexpected, which you really can't prepare for anyway. One interesting aside to all this is help particular. My daughter has become an adult hood this girl who used to traipse across our carpet in money horseback. Riding boots makes me take my shoes off as soon as I get inside her house. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K, K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook. Or check out

grandkid Chris Keppler BB Nicholson writer befuddling Clorox Wrangler USA Kris K Kepler China Batten Kris K Emma Facebook Twitter McDonald Chime two hundred thirty three thous ten minutes
"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

02:09 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Book disease a couple of weeks ago. I found a hardcover copy of some science fiction novel from the nineteen nineties. It was in mint condition. I very rarely ever read SCI fi or fantasy. But for some unknown reason I bought it. When I got home, I checked Amazon and found that the lowest price for a used hardcover copy of that book was eight dollars. I pay. Paid fifty cents for it at the thrift store. One of the reasons I shop with the thrift store at least once a month. Sadly, the book went onto my crowded bookshelves together dust anyway to get back to the subject there. I was in the kitchen section of the thrift store looking for plates for my potted plants when suddenly I spotted something outta shelve that I immediately picked up. It was one of those plastic cafeteria trays with divided sections for different entrees, all my life. I had wanted one of those that is what I have always liked about cafeterias with these section trays they serve their food pre separated. There was no need to build walls to separate the different foods because the walls were pre into the Trey no Jews from one food gets mixed up with the other foods. These cafeteria trays are marvel of modern innovation. I stood there in the aisle. All of the kitchen section of the thrift store for several minutes holding onto that cafeteria tray. It was only a quarter. I really wanted it. But my noggin went into hyper debate mode. It reason back and forth for way too long. Finally, put the tray back on the shelf after all I'm not a kid anymore. Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K, K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook. Or check out my website, WWW dot Chris Kepler dot com.

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"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

Does This Happen to You

02:29 min | 1 year ago

"kris k kepler" Discussed on Does This Happen to You

"Myself a dark night I've blocked out per. Personal time to help co workers with onerous or overwhelming tests once at a summer camp, I help sharpen three hundred pencils. I ran errands for people with my free time. What I didn't do was stand around and criticize offer solutions, and then call that helping these problems erupt in marriage as well as the workplace in marriage. You're stuck with your white Knight for a while, even if you opt for divorce so you have to talk through effective ways to divide responsibilities at work, not so much. You have options you can pick and choose who work with most of the time so pick the dark Knight's leave the white nights alone. Ask for fairness not help you might wind up in a situation where you're doing an unfair amount of work in that case don't ask for help. When you do that. It's a bat signal for. White nights. You might be sending the wrong message that you're incompetent or that. You can't handle your normal job responsibilities. You're also creating a situation where people might think you owe them. Gratitude it's fine to express gratitude, but not simply to please someone else, especially if they didn't earn it. Instead talk to your boss and coworkers about workload distribution make a list of all the stuff you're doing show it to them. Let them see that. You don't simply need help you need others to take over. So these responsibilities on a permanent basis that way, you're shifting more than responsibility. You're also making people accountable white nights may not like that. But screw them if they're not actually taking on more work there. Help doesn't mean much defined boundaries. Don't let people feel like heroes for simply pulling their weight. Trust me. Some people spend all night waiting by the bat phone hoping for it to ring. Let them thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed the story, let me know and share it with your friends. Follow me at Kris K, K aria on Twitter or Kris K Kepler on Facebook. Or check out my website, WWW dot Chris Kepler dot com.

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