20 Episode results for "Jason Mraz"

Music Superstars Kesha & Jason Mraz

Bachelor Happy Hour with Rachel & Ali – The Official Bachelor Podcast

1:16:04 hr | 7 months ago

Music Superstars Kesha & Jason Mraz

"Welcome back all our bachelor happy. Our listeners Jet Commandments. You WanNa do. We need to do our daily check every single time making. Sure you're okay. You're safe healthy saying we're here back again bringing you a little bit of normalcy during these abnormal times. No other way to put it. But we've got pretty exciting news for you just to top off the show because today not only do we have a listen to your heart. Episodes talks to you guys about the. We have not one but two amazing guests to share with you guys but we also want to let you know that we have officially launched our social community. Yes we want to hear from you guys. We say every single time but guess what this time we actually made it. You guys to check us out on at Bachelor Happy Hour. You can find this on Instagram. And you can also on facebook and you can find us on twitter at Batch. Happy hours so now more than ever we want to get in touch with you guys so follow along like comment. Diaz go crazy. Do it all so you can get in touch with so we can hear you give you guys some feedback and give you guys the content that you're really craving also in other exciting news. There was a new episode of listen to your heart last night. And we know you tuned in because you know you guys are washing it. You can't get enough of Basler content so of course we're GONNA break down all the drama from that episode for you guys but most importantly we have two major when I say major Brecca. I mean we've done a big before but I don't know we've done it this big so they were therefore next week's episode and they're going to be joining us today so we hope you have. Your quarantine is all ready to go because we have Jason Mraz Ebola. Becca named the other one because she is such a fan. Yes you guys. When I found out we have this person on the podcast. I May Have Pee. My pants a little bit and called my sister was like you'll never know who we're talking to. But Ladies and Gentlemen Drum Roll please because we have cash joining us today and I can not wait. My hands are shaking as we speak. I don't know what to do and Jason whereas in Russia we are bringing it back to you guys on this episode. So I'm a major fan beck is a major fan of both of them And I know we've said this before but I can't help but be just a little bit jealous of the listen to your heart contestants. Because they get to be in the mix I mean we talk to them on Zoom and everything and that's great but I can't even imagine being in their presence like these are some major music icons that they perform in front of and get some feedback from right. I mean I like. I'm a little nervous knowing that we get a talk with them. I can't imagine being an artist and having to perform in front of other major artists props to the contestants because I would be shaking in my boots but but yes we do have cash. We do have Jason whereas and I can't wait because not only am I just such a fan of their music but I can't wait to see them on the show. This is the first time that we're really bringing in the guest. Judges that have blue lived and breathed embedded in this world and so to have their feedback. I think is just going to be something really great for not only the contestants but for us as viewers to watch okay. You've heard Rachel and I talk about how much we love. Bud Light Seltzer. And if you haven't tried it yet well let me tell you you are missing out but let seltzer is five percent alcohol and only one hundred calories and the best part is it tastes great also by just came out with their new boat. Lemonade which is a premium light. Lager made with real eliminate for a refreshingly crisp taste but also wants to remind everyone to please stay home and keep you and others safe by Seltzer and Bud Light. Lemonade bowl tastes just as good as hanging out on your couch or having a virtual happy hour with your friends to get beer delivered directly to your door had to drizzly dot com. That's D R is E. L. Y. dot com first time drizzly users can use the Promo Code Bud light at checkout for five dollars off. That'S DRIZZLY DOT COM. Promo Code Bud light for five dollars off. Some state restrictions apply you know before we jump into talking with both of them. We have a whole new episode that we have to cover and Rachel I mean. We've we've only seen a couple of weeks now. But from what we've seen attacks one of the producers this after after the last episode I think it is one of my favorite shows now in the franchise just because it's you know we keep saying it's like a combination between Bachelor bachelorette Bachelor in Paradise Winter Games like but the fact that these people are so talented and it just adds a whole new amazing layer to what the show is. I mean I am so invested and and this week we saw a similar performances. They weren't massive. They were like these cute small things here and there like on the boardwalk and whatnot but just to be able to hear these people saying in perform. I mean I'm so invested I'm so invested in suite two so I can't wait to see what the season has to bring but not only am I in love with the show for the music. But you guys. We can't forget the drama which we saw a lot go down between so many different people between so many different couples or starting couples and we have a dive in. Because it's getting good people now to kind of recap what we saw last night. I mean obviously. The men had the roses the power this week to try new girls came into the house. There's four dates total. We've we have even seen a little. Love Triangle already began and then also dubbed done a wouldn't be Abacha Fridge show without some drama and achieving scandal. Rachel where do we start with this one? There's no other place that could end to just start from the beginning so we pick up where we left off and the next morning after the first rose ceremony and the guys. I find this so interesting so the guys are sitting around talking because they were given the roses last week and off. The Bat Brandon is rubbing me the wrong way. I mean he's like yeah. You know I appreciate the rose that I got from Savannah like Kinda like basically. I did what I needed to do to get the rose now that we have the power this week because the man had the power. He's like I want to get to know the other women and I'm like you were all over Savannah the first night and now you're like not that I have the power. Let me just see what else is out there. I don't know I I. They were cute couple and it seems like he just used her four rose to yeah and that's one thing too that like even watching paradise last season. I I started to pick up on it. It's like people are forming certain alliances not based necessarily on a connection with somebody. But just stay safe and trying to make it to the next week and so I mean obviously. We've seen a lot more. Braden this week because he appeared to be a hot commodity with multiple women and we will dive into that Diet but it is interesting to see how at first all the guys last were shaking in their boots and not knowing what to expect it now. It's like the flip. The switch has flipped because just talk. Flip the switch talk. You know all about those challenges God. I'm such approach these days. No I definitely line people Yeah so we see another day card comes in and it's for Jamie So Jamie and trevor go to the Venice Boardwalk which I think is actually really cute Side note when I'm on the show. This is an a spoiler on that one of the episodes this season. I'm on with Andy Grammer. And he said he played the Venice Boardwalk for four years before he made it big. So there's a lot of history there for musicians so. I thought it was cute that they had this moment on the boardwalk. Doing their thing. Now let me put on a different hat. Okay I'm like okay says something positive Bellamy's okay. What did you think of Jamie and trevor on their date on the boardwalk the performance? I will say I. It's still seems like puppy love. I thought it was three when they were talking before they actually performed of She was kind of nervous. Didn't quite know how the performance was going to go and he took the lead and I like how he's like you know. What Song do you WanNa do if you need me to play? The Guitar will step up. Do it watching them. Perform the lake physically perform like we see the kiss in. We see the smiles. I'd like I feel like she's more invested and he's a not not more standoffish. I just don't know if it's fully like the level of commitment or like desire in that relationship on his end is necessarily there. Yeah because I feel like there was a drop off between last week's episode in this week you saw him stand up in a room full of people and say I'm here for Jamie. Jamie doesn't really pick me. I don't know what I'm GONNA do. He was all in because it was more of a competition. It's almost as if he's trying to get her away from Ryan now he's got her and I just villa like the passion wasn't fair to say she had better chemistry with Ryan at one point. She's in her. It and she's talking and she's like. Oh I'm just afraid to sing with him. I'm afraid we don't have that musical connection online certain girl. You should be afraid because you had that with riot and we were rooting for you. We will make for you and you you win with Trevor and watching them saying I mean. She sounds great by herself. He sounds great by himself. I felt like they were two individuals singing rather than singing together as one which She Ryan Sang Gravity and that studio I and she was so scared to me. He carried her and made her feel comfortable and we saw the two of them make beautiful music together with Trevor. I know I mean just the little bit that we've seen of trevor and even talking to him on the podcast said a few weeks ago. He's so sweet. He's very kind and polite. I think he's more like he just seems maybe a bit more. Bashful and reserved. And so. Maybe that's where it's coming from. I don't know him well enough. Haven't seen enough to know That's just like me trying to come up with some sort of reason why it fell off a little But from the Short Montana that I've seen of them. Nfc of her. I just think she seems much more into him much more smitten in the relationship than he does. Yeah well BECCA. I feel fooled after after. He had an interview with Trevor and we. We Adore her. We thought he was great. We thought hey. If this doesn't work out for you you could be great for the Bachelor on starting to sing a different tune. And it's not because of Natasha who we are going to get into the mansion raising straight hell not. That's not it. It was his response to Natasha. It was his response in how he acted. I watched the Way People Act. Not necessarily what they say. Which is why now my antennas up with Trevor. So let's just gets into Tasha. Yes so latasha comes in beautiful right. I'm like the girl is Chilean. She's franch she thinks in Spanish. She sings in France. She's stunning. Say what can this woman not do well. In addition to that she comes in and she brings US drama. She brings great cv so we thank you for that. So she comes in and says she knows. Trevor because she was friends with travers ex girlfriend and then she reveals to the group that there's no other way to say it. Charles dog he's a dirty dog So what did you think about the TASHA coming in? Did you believe her? Did she think she was exaggerating? Like what was your initial. Take mine take okay. You know me you know. I have my doubts girl. So I'm all about honesty and transparency so the fact that she came in and was like I'm going to say like it is. I'm not going to hold anything back again and I appreciate. I don't think it's anyone's place to Start Gossiping. And saying what she was saying to the entire group now if rains if her main concern was really. I don't want this to happen to another girl. She should've been waited for Jamie ticket home and had a conversation in separately with Jamie. Okay again people this is a TV. Show I get that. We need the drama. We need things to be amped up a certain way but I don't think it was her place to pull trevor aside and to basically say you have to tell her this because this is his first date with this girl like Jamie and trump. This is their very first date. And if all of the allegations that Natasha's says are true of trevor like that. He did cheat on her friend a year and a half ago. Okay everybody has passed. Everybody has made mistakes if trevor is into Jamie and into the relationship at some point and hopefully he's GonNa respect turnoff to be honest and tell her when he's ready but I don't think necessarily after a first date Having somebody else basically say you have to tell her I well after she's already told twenty other people it just the wrong way again. I'm not saying she shouldn't have been honest. But I think the approach could have been handled very differently. This is where I agree with you and then I disagreed on one part so I definitely agree. She should not have told the whole room. It was like she was trying to turn the whole House against driver but I think that she was right to confront Trevor. And Not Jamie. You don't know Jamie your your beef with trevor so we have traveled the opportunity to tell Jamie but I agree with you too. That it's not the the best time to say it on the first day but when he said he's made mistakes. Jamie didn't ask the right questions on their date. He's like Mate's mistakes in the past. Jamie Lee should be like. I'm sorry. What MISTAKES. What exactly right at the end of the day. Jamie's also twenty one. So I feel like she doesn't have necessarily the experience or the wherewithal to ask those questions. Maybe half those experiences in a relationship I I think my favorite part though was when Trevor's seasonal Tasha they get back from the day and Natasha's like I know you and he's like carrying a credit look familiar and she's like I'm friends with your ex girlfriend and then she's like I'd love to talk to you and he's like yeah. Let me go get settled for a second. She's like actually no bitch right now. Talk to me right now. And I felt like she had his number he was gonna go try to figure out how he knew her linger out kind of his how he was going to approach the conversation with their and get a game plan together and she was like absolutely not. You'RE GONNA sit down right now with me and have this conversation. I loved it. I will say there was one part in that conversation between Natasha and Trevor. That can bother me a little bit because and it wasn't until the very end when you know she asked him did you lie. Did you cheat whatever the part at the very end where she goes and I don't remember where forward what she said like? Are you going to go tell Jamie and like act on this? And he goes yes I am and her response goes while it doesn't seem like that to me and in my mind. I'm like doesn't response. You should be giving it. This just met him. You just met Jamie for two seconds. You don't know how he's going to after how he handled certain things so that that comment and I wrote that in my notes. That's the part that irked me And then going back to your thing about Jamie and you know she is only twenty one. She probably hasn't been in too many relationships to kind of know how to navigate certain situations. I mean we do kind of see it. The instance where it Natasha. Trevor go off and Jimmy's left talking with other women and she starts sobbing and it's like the end of the world and will look wise anything going right. It's like honey. Give it time give it three hours. Have a conversation with him. Get his side of things before you think. The world is ending So you are starting to kind of see. Jamie's age a little bit. I like Jamie. I think she's like we spunky. I enjoy watching her. I enjoy listening to her saying on but it is just an age thing that you you do. See between her and some of the other contestants. Yeah because she can't be definitive with her decision. She said. Sheetings dill breaker for her. And this world. You only have a few seconds days. Whatever weeks to really get to know someone so you Kinda have to be very definitive and Mike your stance on what what you're gonNA take and whatnot and if you're just meeting somebody and you find out that they have this past people can't change totally change but In this instance. I thought maybe she shouldn't have just been all in with trevor inches taken a step back and say like we'll still navigate this relationship. But I'M NOT GONNA put all my eggs in one basket one thing out and this is for batter nation people to never trust okay. So you see Jamie. And she's balling and she's got these real tears and the cameras all interface and it's up close and personal and you see trevor. He has his hands in his head. He's rubbing his eyes rubbing his hair and it's all from a distance. Never Trust the guy who was so distraught that he hides his face from the camera and his quotes and I'm using air quotes here people tears. Why because he's religious hiding? His lack of emotion from the cameraman are not yours. John was not distraught. Was just like Dang it on my kicked off the show. I was like you have to watch the the person who's tears. You never really say. There's something they're adding there. I will say yes because there are times where I mean coming from the show and being on bachelor and Bachelorette like there are times where there are like you. Have you like you WanNa feel certain emotions in like for me? It's hard at times like feel certain things like when you really are upset and you're not going to let optima because you're constantly filming you like you have to let that out and so you can got an people watch watch future season so you will see this. You will notice. We don't keep going on like the bulk of the drama was between trevor an Tasha and Jamie. There were two other dates. So we'll get to those will cover the dates brioche it. Three remorse dates buds. And we'll get to those less but still it was beautiful things so pre and crest. Nothing dramatic here. Just really sweet and lovely to watch. They go on a date A Guitar Center and I really appreciate it this because they were so excited to be at this hit a Historic Guitar Center on Sunset Boulevard. And they're talking about the instruments and just appreciating the artistry of everything in the history. That's been a date on the bachelor. They would have been like. Oh we're not breaking the Guitars Whitney. Somebody famous coming out. Are you going to gift me with an instrument? What's what's happening here? Yeah it was nice to appreciate the simplicity mandate because there was so much more to it the part that I liked about their date. Is this the first time that we've seen this? I think one of the contestants is they when they when when Chris are complaining that Guitar and Bridges. Start singing like they were performing a cover to any other song that was just them on the fly and I thought that moment was so beautiful and special and in my mind and thinking. Oh my gosh if I was put on the spot like this there's no way I would be able to come up with lyrics. Sound this amazing. Have this connection and so I think watching that moment was something really special for them and it was I love. I like them if I wrote in my notes. If they're not supposed together after this I quit right. Watching them is unlike watching. Trevor in Jamie on that Venice Boardwalk that Chris and bree chemistry German Janey still struggling trying to find it a bit I do have to point out hot. How heartbreaking was brief story about the guy that she was forming leads to and how she had found the wedding dress. She's so excited. And then he basically tells her Actually buy the dress. I felt like it was carry sex and sitting when she got broken up with the posted. Yes on the same level that you know it was like sex in the city when Carey was walk going to her wedding and sees her future husband driving by the opposite way from the church. That's what it was like just and you know when we talked a couple of weeks ago I knew. Obviously that she'd been engaged in that things had ended. I didn't we didn't know why. Did you hear the way that it went down? It was I mean I think for any woman. Anyone who's been in a relationship where it hasn't turned out like you feel about heartbreaking. You feel that empathy for someone else but Kudos for her to Burford going out putting herself show in. Everyone watched a potentially new relationship. Unfold and so I think I think what her in Chris have going right. Now is very sweet and it. I'm GonNa say it could be a real s relationship from what we've seen so far very sweet. I am a little concerned that they are moving a tad bit fast already expressing feelings of love. I know that you're on the fast track. When it comes to his franchise but it was just low too soon for me. Shoutout to whoever had them sing? Can't help falling in love. Especially I like the song. Wise Men say only fools Russian. I'm just saying they are moving fast. Skurdal's whoever put that together Okay so Sheridan and Julia probably our next dramatic relationship so off the bat. It's very obvious that they're on two different pages. He's in the her than she is in the Hem. Yeah more so than I think. Jamie's into two trevor. I think Sheridan is so into Julia and you can tell it's not there for Julia. No it's not it's like she's trying she's trying to do something different and anytime she has to talk about it. I feel like the the true colors come out. You know their I. Heart radio side. Note shouts Kevin Manno who Was alleys husband. I thought could for him for asking all the messy questions. He's clearly buried to a Bachelorette when he said. You kissed anybody else to help. I said yes Kennedy Right. Yeah when she was like actually have poor shared it. It's like I like shared and I'm a fan of him but it's like Bra them on the writing on the wall. Yes yeah she's not that into you. Know no definitely not and he seems like such a sweetheart but like you just a little bit ago. He is one to put all his eggs in one basket. One thing I will say about Julia Julia when they performed I. I don't know for whatever reason I thought when she was gonNA sing like it was gonna sound operatic and like this like oh was gonna come out and her voice was so different from what I expected but it was beautiful and I think on in that moment on that date in that performance she really carried it yes I actually thought. They had a lot of chemistry inward performance. I'm looking at my notes and it's like voices are fire. One of my favorite voices. This is chemistry. Like I'm looking at the little notes. Julius voice was so it was effortless when she was singing. Almost thought is this prerecorded. It didn't sound like she was standing in line. I was so impressed with Julius Voice. I was to Beca. It's funny that you say that about their voices. Because I literally wrote to ask you a question. Are you surprised by the people's voices when they start singing? Because you have this image in your head and then it turns out totally different. Which I think is the Nice beautiful surprise. Yes I agree. I think I don't know what I expected like knowing when the show is coming out I was like. Oh Yeah of course. They'll be talented and they can sing but like these contestants can really really saying I I love it that like I want to. Just listen to them like I want to be just one episode of them straight up performing like nothing else. They just want us to them. I feel like that's GonNa come so speaking of voices that were surprised by Savannah Brand GonNa date honestly could have just passed right through this nothing. I felt nothing from the date. I was completely shocked. At Brandon's voice. It was very theatrical. It was great. I just wasn't expecting him to sound like that. Nor was that maybe it was the song maybe fever nature's grooming Savannah to. I don't know I. Yeah it was it like for a date. It was very mediocre. I There wasn't much many fireworks like they had a conversation they sitting. That was really the just a bit. Yeah the the fireworks were that couple. That was a part of that. Date credits thank you with a half day. Yeah so I I'm trying to think of the other highlights of the episode. I mean I mean there's Malan brand. There's the drama with that Cornell. I it's it's sad to me when a woman or man is so into another person and they don't reciprocate it even wrote down. I'm like poor Mellon shared and found each other in the kitchen to loss lovers. In the night I write a song about this now but the counter like neither one of them are into each other. I mean they're lovers aren't into them and it just it was. It's very sad to watch. The other only highlight from episode. Like we get into the rose ceremony. We get into Julia now questioning which feels her Sheridan going back to Brandon. Brandon's GonNa pick her. We see it all go down. I'm starting to have a slight with Julia. Her words are measure actions. And so I'm very interested to see what's going to happen next week. Quite honestly because she fled outside in her interview. I won't Brennan's rose. I need to get this from Brandon. We see Brandon. Give it to somebody else then. Giuliani accepts the rose from Sheridan. Don't Don it's like you just said one thing. The entire world is seen back. And now you're GonNa make our shared the second he gives you. This rose and then still want brandon. It's getting very messy. No one hundred percent agree. I couldn't I couldn't have said it better. I'm so glad she pointed out Julia. I feel like we need to let watch her. You know we're we're onto you. Only other thing I will say is. Can we get a heartbreak every single episode? Because I needed rudy to lay down the soundtrack for it. Can we pause on her singing? Love is a losing game. Anyway I don't even know the other girl who was on the piano rudy. Who's The music musical director for the show because picking out the racial I went down a rabbit hole last night? Watching Rudy on instagram. And Okay Rudy. If you're listening or if anyone is listening please have rudy. Just can you just audio record me? One Song Incentive to me. Dm Me. I will give you my number whatever I have to do to get you to sing me a song because I literally watched every performance on her instagram and every singing video that she has like fourteen times. And I'm not exaggerating garrison. Why the Hell do you keep listening to business? I'm sorry no I will do that now. I haven't listened to her on instagram. But she's absolutely amazing The other thing get rudy's amazing when she's singing. I can't comment on her the way she is. How or or a hot mess and I but I love it. I love it and she knows it. She knows about yourself. One thing I did not. I don't know if you caught this when brandon gifts van of the Rose and you know how they're always waiting to see who's GonNa come around the corner. I do love that though. I love that dining on another show when he comes around the corner with Savannah. Pure disgust is on his face. You caught that if anybody else were wide. Go back and pause it on. Brandon's face when he gives savannah that rose but then do you notice like five seconds later when they're waiting for the other couples to come up and Brandon and Savannah are making out as all the other people are watching whose votes were making out in the court not cast that. We're GONNA go back and Rewatch like this this little clip of the rose ceremony. Okay Beca you know we keep going on and on and on we have to. We feel like we have to carry this over into our lives. Guys have got to come to our lives where we do. It's like the after hours time we talk more about the show. We answer your questions and let you know even more indepth what we're thinking about each episode of listen to your Heart where we hope you're loving it as much as we are but as much as I love that episode especially the dramatic ending. I cannot wait for next week's episode because next week. The couples start performing in front of celebrity judges. And let me tell you back of these. People are freaking talented. I notice first hand. I can't talk specifically about the episode that I was a part of. But I'm telling you you're going to be so impressed if you think. This has been good just way even Brian. I mean we still talk about it so I am so excited for you guys to watch these next upcoming episodes Gingrich. I'm very jealous that you Brian were guest. Judges I I. If there's a another season of this I want to be part of that because I find this so interesting and I just I'm like gravitating towards these people in their voices and so I'm so jealous that you could see them live and I can't wait to see what familiar faces for other guests. We're going to have to Just imagine if they've been this good for the first season imagine with season two is going to have. I'm talking and I'm not talking about anybody who's been a judge on the show because the judges have been phenomenal. But you just imagine like you know shows get bigger and bigger so we're talking beyond stay Justin Bieber you know what I mean. The Sky's the limit. All right guys I could talk about this show forever but I'm way too excited to talk to her. I guess if you haven't already poured yourself another quarantine now would be the time. Just screw the quarantine. You can just go right ahead. Brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack because we have a major guest joining us right now. Her new album high road is available now. And you can also see this mega popstar as a guest judge next week on. Listen to your heart so without further Ado Ladies and Gentlemen. It is cash okay. Let's be honest these days. You're limited on ways you can stay fab fit and fun for me. I use my Peleton. It helps me escape mentally. It helps me feel like I'm on an adventure. I do it with friends and honestly helps me stay fit also all about having zoom conference calls with my girlfriends. Badu virtual happy hours. I do it with my friends from back home. I even with some former bachelorettes but the best way to get the trendiest latest products without leaving home is through facet fun and it totally fits between these quarantine measures and social distancing measures that we have today every facet fund. Box is different for each person. But you're some of the things that I got from my latest box that I want to share with you number one. The downy rip sweater coat is my faith. 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The box retails for forty nine ninety nine but each box is worth at least two hundred dollars. I know it's still. You're welcome plus. I'm not done yet. You can use the coupon code B. H. H. For Ten dollars off your first box by going to www dot fat fund dot com. That's ten dollars off with coupon code be h h when you go to. Www DOT fat pit fund dot Com. Okay cash we have to ask you. How was your experience being on the show? Because this is the first time you've been affiliated with the Bachelor Franchise. It's quite an experience. You're talking to to former BACHELORETTES. Here how was it for you? I know I'm like a little geeking out because I have to tell you I'm such a fan like I've been like a secret fan for a very long time me and my girlfriends. We always like get drunk and watch the Bachelor Bachelorette always the Bachelorette is way more entertaining. I Le Woman has power. I love that cash. I wish you could see my face right now because I have the biggest grin I have to start off by telling you girl and so hard but you are what I swear. Got Me through my season of the Bachelorette because so my I quote unquote theme song for the season was woman and anything to do with the producers. Told me like what song it was gonna be any time throughout the season that I was down or frustrated or in a funk the producers would come up because I didn't have my phone on me hobbies. They said they'd come up and start playing woman on their phone and that would just like snap to the funk and get going again it would just turn me back on and the fact that I feel like it's come full circle the fact that we're now talking to you. I am so excited so thank you nothing we can do. My God meet you. Find me feel like it's like my heat grit and I was like you know what I'm GonNa come out with it. I the Bachelorette. I don't care what anybody thinks. Judge me world but I also get a battle a lot with my music like people be like. Oh secretly. I really liked your music and it doesn't have to be a secret we can just have the Bachelorette exactly yeah send you a T shirt. A t-shirt account cash when this quarantine is over and the seasons also up again Like Bachelorette once he watched Claire. I'm just GONNA invite you over to drink wine with me and hang out and watch the show together. I love that now. We absolutely one hundred percent. I love watching you. Just be such a bad us and like I swear. I'm not even trying to be a total nerd right now but I'm going to be just soon. Women be able to express themselves so eloquently while there's cameras rolling and I'm sure it feels like the way the world is on your shoulders in that moment and your without your phone and without being able to talk to your family. Yes and just they can air all of that. I love just watching you guys be so direct and Baba's and straightforward create boundaries. It's like very empowering golden has to get you off my when we get loose at the Tong and start spilling please. I want the secrets from now but later all the secrets. Oh yes you'll get girl and I will say to back at. You have just shown shown so much strengthening you're just such a powerhouse of a woman and so thank you for that and using your voice to empower all the girls out there who are fans. Well we're all in this together especially as women like I get it. I love watching you guys. Just hold it down with like thirty days. You start with thirty. Yes ma'am sailboat. If everyone's like Oh wasn't that so fun and the first thing when you meet thirty dudes it's actually really intimidating and I mean difficult to remember names and all the Info that that's coming to but you know let's be honest. We can't complain dating thirty guys dream and the nightmare to put it nicely. Yes we love. Hearing that you're a fan of the show in the franchise that's amazing so coming on and being asked to be one of the judges like what was going through your mind and and to be able to experience being on listening to your heart. I was super geeking out and really excited to me. Chris Harris and and and I brought my friend got into the Bachelor started as a drinking game and I wasn't really paying attention. 'cause I started with one of the seasons but there was a guy in charge. Now like what is this now. Thanks and then switched over to the woman and getting to be in charge of like wait. I'm really into the show into the Bachelorette so then I got sucked in and can't quit. Just being brought her with me and she's now pregnant so we no longer have bachelorette drinking games She came with me and we just keep that over Christmas and we were sitting there. It's for the new singing show. Have you left to sing together? And being a couple and really curious how that's going to turn out because like in a star is born works out but like in my personal life. Has Me and my boyfriend had to make music together. I agree with murder each other. So I'm really curious how they're gonNA go like how shows gonNA work out. Yeah we'll let me ask you this because we've had actually some of the contestants on our podcast the past few weeks and we always ask them like have. They dated a musician before. Or could they see that partnership work and it's always kind of a split vote half are like no we you know we think about heads into be too much and then some of them are like it's really cool emotional experience that they've never been able to experience in a relationship with the partner. That wasn't a musician. So it's interesting to get your take and I I guess I WanNa ask you have you in. The past dated a musician. Oh God yeah I won't ever do it again. Took law goes. We're so lazy. Conditions are crazy people. Especially if you get like someone who's truly just like a Weirdo like I am and then you put it together with someone else. Who's a true Weirdo? It really entertaining but it can get like real crazy. I guess it'll make for great. Tv Music and music music. Yes I can only. Which is why this is going to be a great TV show. Because you know for people who are fans of the bachelor franchise it's like. They say it's Bachelor Pad Times Bachelor Times Bathroom Paradise Times American idol. So I'm curious with the coming on the show and you don't know what you're walking into. Did you expect it to be 'cause I know how back I reacted it? You think that you were going to. Actually they were you impressed by the artistry of the musicians that you saw the show I was. I was really impressed with a lot of people such different kinds of Asia. And we're so talented but that would be the hard part. Some of them just really felt so in love but then stylistically. They didn't match but they were both really talented. And then there was one girl. That's incredibly talented. But I just Kinda didn't feel like she really liked the person she was singing right and that was hard for me because they said they're supposed to be here for love. I like you have to put talent second love and the relationship has to come first and so watching someone being incredibly talented bit not seemingly fell in love with their partners kind of confusing and difficult for me to hate judging people anyways it's like the worst on it but especially in that situation 'cause this girl so talented but she you're not in love with this guy he yeah. So that's actually you raise a good point because one thing I mean. I'm not an I cannot hold a note worth my life. I wish I could but but I watch you and others perform and there's just so much emotion feeling that goes into it for instance. I need to talk about your grammy performance. A couple years ago when your performance crane let me just say I if for anyone out there who hasn't seen this unique to Google Youtube it whenever you have to do. I'm such a fan of will one of my favorite movies in sister. Act Two and so I lost the dwyer like great everyone to my favorite hands on one of my favorite movies and so When you started that performance it felt like I got that vibe that feeling and watching you perform on stage with all of these women like you could save even just talking about it like I get the chills remembering you on that stage with all of those women. You're all in your stunning white. Like just had that beautiful choir esque feel but there was so much emotion that you could just feel like you could've saying like two seconds of that song just felt it and so I'm wondering when people reforming guests kind of going into now. Listen to your heart. These couples do you think like when you're performing and you do have that amazing artistry like is it easy to to fake that emotion at times or does it really just have to come naturally and if it doesn't for some people maybe that that's why you're seeing like the disconnect between couples. I really think and thank you. You're so sweet. I can't wait to sit around and drink wine with you. Guys is going to end We could do like a zoom wine called later anyways but you're so sweet and that was such a scary moment for my life have not watched it back just because I was so scared for like two months before that happened. The emotion us on that moment was so real to the point where I just felt like I was going to pass out. I was so nervous though. Being knowing what it feels like to be in a situation where it's really high stakes. It's really emotional on. Listen to your heart. I was really forgiving if someone hits funny note or makes a face because you know maybe they missed a part or they messed up apart because to me a real artists can mess up or hit a wrong note and that's totally fine. It's not about being perfect. It's really about showing the emotion and I for one. Don't know how somebody could do that with. Someone just met and then putting the relationship. I am Ben trying to sing their heart out. It would really have to be like a magical connection. I think to be able to have that. Come through with the songs. And that's what you see some of that. There were a couple of couple of like wow. They're in love and I can tell just watching them. Perform I know their in laws and then there are some that kind of came off more like they were. Friends are any kind of didn't seem like they liked each other very much at all. I was GONNA ask did some of it with some few more like an act where they were just trying to give that performance that saw that they really cared about. Yeah and that's okay like again. I mean you guys know this. You can't force love and if it's not fair like it's no one's fault and it shouldn't be you know I don't blame. I wouldn't blame myself or anybody else that I didn't fall in love with someone but yeah. I think I saw some people that wanted to be in love that they just weren't and for me. I can just really see that especially when combined on stage because I been on stage so many times in so many high pressure situation so I know how that feels and there was one in particular in pretending her name but she was just so nervous and they just want to give her a big hug and be like okay just breathe and but you could tell. She really likes the purchasing. Yeah Jamie I think you're talking about Jamie. She's so sweet questions. So since you're a big fan of Bachelor Nation Franchise now you've been a part of it and you've been a judge on the show. Would you ever go on a show like this? Are you kidding I dream? I told Chris Harrison as like listen. Boyfriend doesn't work out. I'd be the most be the most fun Bat Shit Crazy Bachelorette. You've ever have you for that season I would love. I would love to just like put through the ringer. That sounds really fun. You just test on your favorite one is not so catchy your current play for now. He so he currently is not a musician. Correct well he makes music but we don't we like sometimes make it together but for the most part he just lets me do my thing and I let him do his Bam. We don't make music together. Because he likes to make like terrifying sound his words he calls. He calls it like a trash noise so he makes contact. I like I like to make a fancy pop songs that make people feel good. So you kind of reminded me of Garrett my fiance and I because I'm more indie music and then Garrett likes the heavy metal is like in scares me and I'm afraid if you were to if you were to perform what would be your go-to Song as a couple. Oh my God. That's really funny I don't think I've been dating him for years now and he never wants. We'll do karaoke with me. Which is really funny. Because he's come on tour with me for six years. He's been on tour with me. He won't do carry out with me. That's how I think we had to do with I don't think he would do it but I accept some flamboyantly windy on fire and he would probably just sit in the corner. I Love Hill Kessel. We could keep talking to you on and on especially now that we have gotten the pleasantries out of the way can out over each other. I love that we have. We know we love you too so we know you just released a new album Jairo. Can you tell us a little bit about it else? You have going on right now. Yeah I just released record in January and it was something I was working on for a year and a half but some of the songs. What people don't I wrote seven or eight years ago and then you can kind of go back and revive them. That's been really interesting. Process is going back and finding little hidden gems. Maybe weren't right for that point in time when I wrote down but then bringing them to their current situation which is on the record. I just released so I have found that I started writing almost a decade ago. That are now on the record and then I am song you know three months ago. That are on the record. And it's just funny to to play with art and brilliant. I wanted to make a record. The boundaries just. I just want it to be whatever I wanted to be and have it be really fun and really positive and they just like I think the world can never get enough positively. Yeah that's right now. It's like a diary you can go back and reread this old entries and at times pull bits and pieces and still feel the same so I feel like that. That's what this album sounds like so I can't wait to check it out in endless into it all but I will definitely well. I'M GONNA I'M GONNA get your number after this. We're going to talk but I I love that that that just sounds like such an amazing piece of an album to have together of all of the the music from a decade ago. That's just crazy But I need to ask you because I was craving hard on Instagram and I saw that you just release your home alone in which I was dying. I love that video so so is that all just done at your home. Yeah shot all that Like four days ago because we've been in warranty now for thirty three days. Not that I'm counting. Sorta like keep my creative whatever you wanNA call them us. Just keep it alive. I've been making videos in my house of just running around. Who who films at or do you just do like the the Selfie. Stand where you do the hands free? I like all thing I have. I bought ring. Y lights up and Amazon got stand. It's like a one woman show over here. Oh and then my boyfriend would like get. Then he'll be like whipped now. Dan Thanks I can picture him. Because he has like the highest socks. Like and you're crawling under. I can just picture him walking in and be like what the hell are we you doing. He's probably low. Asha that's younger. He's he's like. Oh okay look it is not faze him anymore the behind the scenes of this now put it all together because it's probably like a little bit like what you do with the Bachelorette but I just whenever I date someone. I kinda put him through a series of tests and see if they pass like the first time. I take my wig often. Someone see how they react like you. You have to pick my wig off to in the morning and see if they can do it. You get there man enough to take off wig. Andy's Oh say cash you have to do a spoof on the show that has to be put out because you have to do it because you know it. Well you're a part of all of this now. I WANNA be by one of you now. Talking with US NEXT ON DECK. I feel like this is the silver lining of quarantine is seeing how creative people are becoming in releasing content out to all of us like re craving so much of it now more than ever. So thank you thank you you you you also bring me so much happiness especially at night. If I get like weirded out by the state of affairs I just put on any episode of the Bachelorette and just all of a sudden. I knew like happy and okay so you guys are all providing like the same kind of happiness. Hopefully that could provide a little bit of you definitely do. We're all in this together. We'll catch thank you so much for joining us today. Like I said I'M GONNA I'm GonNa give you my number after this and we're going to. We're going to have twins bachelorettes. He starts up again for sure. Yes we can totally watch. Listen to your heart together. Yes yes be so fun next week's episode all three of us together cute so we'll thank you so much harsha jazz guys say yeah. You Chew Cranky. Don't go my God I will on. Thanks for putting your entire love life for the world to see so entertaining slide. Were all right. You Take Care Bye. I was just waving goodbye like she can see me. She can fill us. Becca freaking call that I mean you never know go as a fan of basketball no and I love finding out and I feel like I feel like we just became best friends cash. Oh my high school college self is literally freaking out inside. The test has given us their phone number address. Her zoom log handed. Except it's like it's so funny because people come from this show and you see all all the other girls like hanging Noah Selena Gomez or Demi Lovato and now we got a girl cash now. It's so now how willing she was just like sit down. Talk with us out her time on the show. Apparently she's been waiting for this call forever which they didn't. I feel I feel like we should have had Chris Harrison on the line with us because it seems like she is such a fan which I get. I remember the first time I met Chris. I was like just speechless. Obviously no even me. It's like a universal feeling because I didn't watch the show before but you know Chris. Harrison. He's laziness franchise. Yes any other leads. So when you meet all my it's happening that got real. Yeah well I do hope. Things work out with her boyfriend. I mean they seem like a good balance for each other but things did not work out one thousand percent. I would want her to be bad short in at some point absolutely also curious as to what trash music sounds like. Just WanNa just WANNA know. I'm going to connect with her after this and see if I can get like a little audio sampling of it. So we can play one of our episodes. Replace the Bachelor Happy Hour Music with the trash music. I love that he calls a bet to. That's so perfect. Yeah I do okay so as much as we've had with cashew we still have one more special guests for you guys today. 'cause bachelor happy hours doing a big today. This singer Songwriter is a multi Grammy Award. Winning artists with so many songs is truly unbelievable. His newest single look for the good is out right. Now people and you'll see him as a guest judge on next week's episode of listen to Your Heart Ladies and gentlemen the One and Only Jason Mraz Aka. Mr a tizzy clue and Tim. Gunn are back together to launch the next global fashion brand in making the cut a new original series from Amazon twelve designers from around the world compete to take their brand to the next level. Join Heidi and Tim as they travel from New York to Paris to Tokyo to find the designer who has what it takes new episodes available every Friday. Watch making the cut only on prime video. Okay so Jason. We have to welcome you to the bachelor experience. I don't know if you know that she talking to to former bachelorettes you are now a part of the family having been a judge on the show so just off the top. How was your experience on? Listen to your heart. I loved it. I was pleasantly surprised because performing live is not an easy to do. Engaging with an audience in trying to find a connection with the audience is not an easy thing to do trying to connect with the song as a performer With Your Voice in what you're physically capable of not an easy to add in the fact that you have now also connect and not just musically. Connect with your collaborator with musical partner. But but see if there's an actual potentially intimate connection or long lasting relationship connection so it was it was so I was expecting like just drama and or train wreck and or not great musical performances. I was expecting awkward moments and honestly didn't get that many of either of those things I thought it was tastefully done. Great music great musicianship rate singers and a couple of potential connections. Some of which I felt were really authentic. So I was GONNA say is at least surprise I was GonNa say Jayson Dallas. Just let's be honest. You say pleasantly surprised they thought they were GONNA suck. I was a judge later on. I was like okay. This is GONNA be they're gonNA suck is going to be a lot of drama. No we could say I. I thought the same thing so I was in the same boat as you. Well and Richland. I've talked about this. We didn't know what to expect because this is the first time this show has happened. And so we went in thinking like okay. You know there's going to be hopefully couples that form. Hopefully the people can carry a tune and be decent singers but like when we started watching we were both away and so watching the couples in these performances. Go down there. I'm just GONNA ask you. Was there anyone that really stuck out that you were like that person has what it takes to like? Keep going keep going far whether it was just an individual or a couple. I was in the early. I was in an early group. You had more a lot and most of the couples there there tend to there. There seems to have been like a a standout female standout. Who really was like this is going to be her act and it was really going to be his role to support that. Yes he's part of it and it's meant to be both of them delivering this message. In a lot of cases they're really sent seemed like it was female dominated in the performing side of things. Okay girl taken the lead. I like it runs the world. Becca so you brought up a good point. You know you're trying to connect. These couples are trying to connect not only with each other but with the audience. Did you see anyone? And we don't need names but did you feel like I was there not for the love aspect but more for the fame or the performance and what could come after all of this absolutely. Why think each of them had a little about some of them really ward on their sleeve and you could see like they're really here because they love music? They love performing. They love themselves. And do they love this person at their with? They're not sure yet. I did see a little bit of that. I did see a little bit to see who was here for the right reasons in the wrong reason. Yeah in a in. Throughout the course of the show that will that will be told for sure so prior to coming on this show because it is the bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. Did you watch any bachelor shows? I did I did life sellings or hurt at all. No discredit to the bachelor. I just I haven't really seen any programming. I only just recently got WIFI because of the whole lockdown situation prior to that no TV no Wi fi at home. So I wasn't really caught up on on all the entertainment. You had no idea who Joe Joe Jordan War when you sat to be now knowing people abuse had you cash before I mean another. Choose one of your judges. No but I had just seen her live a couple of nights prior so that was really cool ready to acknowledge her for what I saw her. Do it was cool. Yeah I really enjoyed meeting her. She's Orsi so one thing that we've talked about not only with each other between rich night but with the contestants and some of the other judges that we've had on here is like I personally have never dated a musician. A lot of them also have not They just don't necessarily think it could work. So Jason. Have you ever did musician? And do you think it could work in the long run? Good question I have dated a musician. Maybe two I've definitely dated artists and it can be competitive very competitive because each artist's really wants to be in control of their their personal expression. And you already may have advisers whether it's wardrobe or management or an agent or even just your mom kind of giving you ideas or support. If you have a partner or a spouse who's also giving ideas that support in day to are a musician or artist then they're going to have their own spin on expression and what that expression should look like. So what I found in my relationships with other artists is it's very competitive. Were both were both Sharing what we think is the best way to be seen and heard and it's really in is not healthy. It's not enjoyable either because you want the best and I think this goes for any relationship really you want the best for the person you're with and you really have to give them space to be fully expressed. No matter what it is. They're into they could like different foods. They could like different people like different clothes. And if you truly love them unconditionally. You will allow all of those things to happen. You will allow all of that love and expression to exist for that person so they can have the best life possible and vice versa and in the art industry in the music industry. It's just naturally competitive. And so if someone's trying to impose their thoughts and ideas and opinions in style on you or change the way you're seeing this it's annoying after awhile and it's not unconditional. It seems like you would be cooler if you did it this way. You would sound better if you sang it in this key. You need to practice more. You know all that stuff on a hits the heart that would be the end. It ruins the relationship. Plus you're working together all day. You're on stage by the time you get to the bedroom still interested in this person or do just need to go hide in your closet. Do A podcast piggybacking on that thought. What advice would you give for these couples on the show as they go into this next phase performing their music together if they are serious about the relationship the relationship is going to be more full-time than the music and art because that that happens in windows that happens on the schedule but the relationship is it's really full-time? You know whether you're in your physical presence fulltime and in this case seems like they are Or even if even if you're touring in the studio another person's doing a photo shoot and you're not really together. You're still together in the sense of relationship I think you would be most important to To just consider that this is a job that this is a profession that this only happens in windows and schedule so if we can put on like a work hat if we can be constructive criticism if we can be a bit detached from the artistry so that we don't hurt our our true selves or we don't hurt the other person we have to be responsible about how our criticisms GonNa land without because you want them to be your beloved and feel beloved but you also want the best for them as an artist. So it's GonNa be it's GONNA be wearing too. That's my that's my advice is know that each person means the best when they're offering criticism for the art but also know that there's a time place for that. There's going to be a scheduled for that Bachelor happy. Our listeners thought they were coming on this show and hearing an interview with Jason Mraz About Music. And and what? It's like to be a musician. And how he was judging on the show little. Did they know they've getting relationship? Advised over here. Taking notes Jason. We are working people right into us now for different love advice in dealing with situations and that they're going through suggesting we made just call you up again and take inserted here so Jason. One thing I find it very interesting that you prior to the quarantine you didn't have Wi fi you didn't have TV so during this time. We're really stuck indoors and I think a lot of people are finding new L. Let's be creative and are you finding yourself being more creative able to songwriter a little bit more. Oh Yeah Yeah for sure. Because if I if we weren't in this shelter in place kind of physical distancing. I'd be out on the road right now. Promoting my new album. I be doing interviews at radio stations and TV stations. Be doing some live shows. In fact today I would be in Los Angeles rehearsing with by band. We played show tonight and of course everything's cancelled so that is actually inspired me to organize my space at home. Figure out how I can learn how to do. Concerts from home still connects still create Ihnen ways it's upped the stakes for me because now it's not about the audience at the club tonight is not it's really about The viewers at home. And if they're giving me their time I'm in this. This is the same for audiences no matter. What if someone shows up to your show where they tune into a podcast today tune into your livestream? They're giving you their greatest resource. They're giving you the greatest wealth which is their time and attention and it is up to me as the artist to respect that time in attention and use it for good so to deliver some great messaging tribe delivered beautiful songs. Try to keep it interesting. So I've actually felt more accountable for the quality of my entertainment and the the meaning behind my entertainment more than ever because of the sensitive situation. Well said that's amazing. I I wish more people took took other people's time into interest. I feel like that doesn't always happen enough. So thank you for saying that that's Will and speaking of also you know. I know you have some big news today. Obviously you can't be promoting this new album. But what can we expect from you? I know that you have some big news. What other projects may be working on the future? Sure Well unfortunately my future projects are being moved. There's there's really no date in no program but I did just finished a new album that we're putting out digitally regardless when I say regarding because most albums come with vinyl or CD. You know my parents. They want the CD. My steady the cassette because the kanikar drives. Yeah so we don't have physical Albums this year because manufacturing is slow down but we have a new album. That is out a single is now out. It's called look for the good because I'm just a positive person. I always want to look for the good in in any situation and I didn't think a year ago when I was writing this song that we'd be living in the kind of world we're living in now but regardless of a pandemic. Humans always need hope. Humans always need inspiration to look for the good. A great way to practice looking for the good is to practice gratitude practice. Saying thank you for anything. I mean. There's always something on the surface level you. Can you say. Thank you for breathing. Because without breathing we expire an actual definition of readout is to expire so once we stopped reading we expire so when we practice gratitude. We look for the good. I'm straying from what you asked me. But Avenue single out. It's called look for the good and its title track off of an album called look good which is gonNA come out. June nineteenth filled with all kinds of positive tunes that I breathe life into issues. That are important today. The whole album is a reggae album. So you can dance to every area Like it's hot. Tropic is what this album is and I've always been a big fan of reggae. Santana I teamed up with Michael Goldwasser from easy star all stars which is incredible reggae outfit and we've produced At home actually last summer so finally excited to be getting that out and sharing that with the world. Yeah well I'm so excited to listen. I mean richland. I will probably be having danced. Parties to the new album on on here in our closets are boost if you will But we can't wait and I think the fact that I think not only. Are you an amazing singer and performer but songwriter as well and so the fact that this album is coming at this time? I think it's something that people needing to look forward to so I can't wait so thank you for sharing with us in that regard. It's it's very special. Thank you for everything that she said. Today I mean do we do this. Podcast for Bachelor. Happy our listeners. But I truly been inspired and I know Becca has to see her nodding her head in everything that you were just saying just talking about life and hope and gratitude and even the definition of breathing out. I mean that's like Yoga Talk. I I mean I'll let you know little sacred allergens everything I've ever learned. I learned from Yoga Class. The Yoga teachers they know. What's up? Yes I don't know where they're getting their information from but when you lost check into a yoga class I guarantee an hour later. You'RE GONNA be completely transformed. I I know you don't do five but I have to ask you. Have you seen the Bickham Netflix documentary? Because I do hot yoga which I'm a big fan of hot yoga derivative beak room. Absolutely you've got to watch the documentary and the story behind it you will. It will be disturbing and you'll see why they call it hot yoga now gift to you heard. I've heard through the community and I'm happy to call it hot yoga as well but yes annecy. There's nothing quite like that hot yoga. No no I'm a fan of I could do. We could do a whole our podcast on just talking about how you want to say. Thanks for that recommendation. I'll check it out. Yes yes thank you so much. You have been such a delight. We are so honored to have you on this podcast. Honor to have you be a part of the bachelor franchise guest judge on the show. We hope you come back for something else you know maybe maybe on the Bachelor Bachelorette who knows who knows different things. You could be a part of cool. Thanks for the invite. That's very kind. Thank you get to talk to you BECCA. I I feel like we don't deserve the fund that we get to have on this podcast crazing. Is it that we got to talk to cash today? Jason Mraz and it's just like I don't know I mean it's it's great enough that you and I get to Ki Ki and talk to each other about the show and everything else happening in life but to add to that it's like Oh you know just another day. It's just another day on a Tuesday where we get to talk to think. Bradshaw in our closets Banal is so much fun to talk to them and you guys if you thought that that was big. I mean it was big. But that's just the tip of the iceberg because the guest stars are just GonNa keep coming the season and we're so excited to see. Were so excited for you guys to see this next episode because our judges as you heard or absolutely incredible and also you know we have to sprinkle and some Bashar nation in there. So we've got show Joe Jordan. I mean when's the last time you saw Joe Joe Jordan on your screen so you're GonNa get a little bit of them. You'RE GONNA get Chris and more and lane. The newlyweds the also be on this episode. And are couples finally gets take the stage and they get to perform for us and we get to gain some insight on who they truly are as strong couples in the House and like we've heard snippets of them saying but now we're getting this full outperformance. I know personally. I was blown away by every single performance. You know if I wasn't gala. Hear it on the episode but I literally had chills after each one attorney. Brian and I would say. Are you freaking kidding me back a you know? I feel about music in this episode religious delivered for me and I can't wait to keep saying these performances and it was just round one. I can't even imagine what it's going to be moving forward. I mean I can't a little bit because I was a part of what episode but the other ones I can't even ask. I think I mean it's hard to top week by Week. But it's just gonNA keep getting better and better and I can't wait. I mean I'm personally so excited for our listeners. To Watch too so please everyone make sure you tune in every Monday eight seven central on ABC. And then come back and hang out with US next Tuesday for another episode of Happy Hour with another fabulous cameo from listener heart. And in the meantime everybody we're always trying to give our listeners. Just what they need and now more than ever. I mean we always say this more than ever. We want to hear from you guys. We love the DMZ love the comments. Whatever you have to say like we want to hear the good the bad the pretty the ugly we wanted all So that being said we have finally and I. I don't know why it took us so long because we're constantly on social media especially more so than ever these days but we finally got our own social pages where we can post everything about. What's going on with bachelor? Happy Hour I mean just coming up with some of the fun behind the scenes content and home has been like. Gabby make sure this quarantine so I personally love it. 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A Beautiful Conversation with Jason Mraz on Spreading Kindness, Staying Grounded After Decades of Musical Success & How to Look for the Good

Don't Keep Your Day Job

1:02:29 hr | 5 months ago

A Beautiful Conversation with Jason Mraz on Spreading Kindness, Staying Grounded After Decades of Musical Success & How to Look for the Good

"Look for the good. Despite the fact that there's a lot that. Scary out there. We're still okay. I believe that the opposite of depression it's not happiness purpose I believe that every single person has something unique to contribute to the world, and that's why I won big finish show called. Don't keep your gauge I. Don't if Your Day job is about figuring out what it is you you're with in this world that only you can do to make the world more whole more beautiful and to stop selling yourself short. Stop sitting it out to figure out how to take this thing. We love whether it's art or music or screenwriting dance for baking. How do you decide that you love into a life that you? You get to contribute that. You get to do what you love full-time because it's not just about business, it's about contribution. It's about meaning that is what we see. That is what we truly want. You absolutely are here to serve the world and I want to help you figure out just how much value you have inside of you and every single week. We're going to be talking to people who have something to add to help you. Get Out of runway to help you be more successful to help. Be the truest expression of you. My name is Cathy Heller I'm so glad that you're here. Let's dive in. Hey guys. It's Cathy. Heller, welcome back to another episode of. Don't keep your day job. I am so excited because Moore says is here today. He is not only someone who is so talented, but he is such a genuine, good soul and I can't wait for you to hear this interview. His such a special person I think you'll feel so enlightened just to hear the way he sees the world and the way he shows up so encouraging so inspiring before I dive in I. Just WanNa. Say Thank you so much for all your notes for all the love. It was my birthday this past weekend June nineteenth, and I just had the best day and I. Want to give a huge shout out. Out to my husband, not only because it was father's Day, and he's such a great father, but because he really showed up for me this birthday, he celebrated me and he really nailed it. In terms of my love language, which is words right like you can tell I like words and very verbal person. He wrote me fifty notes to describe how he loves me and what he sees in me and. I was overwhelmed with a feeling of unconditional. Love was crying so hard, and it's good because it sort of forced me to look at my own. Demons when it comes to how much I believe I'm really worthy of receiving, and I could feel. How much he was giving and I could feel myself wanting to say it's okay or no. You didn't have to do that and I just. I let it come in. And then I felt how hard it was to just sit and receive it, and it was so beautiful and so healing, and some so grateful to him. Because marriage for me, has never been just like this linear like nonstop. Thing and I'm constantly working on really showing up in my relationship the same way I, do in my work where I look for the good as Jason Mraz is GonNa talk about today I look for the good and find more good. I can do that in so many aspects of my life, and I want to continue to. Just really see the good and look for the evidence of that as opposed to what I sometimes do. Being a child of divorce being a child who saw my parents fight nonstop, and then break up is I'm constantly looking for the shoe to drop, and so it was just such a beautiful birthday, and in no small part because of all of you I feel so grateful that you're in my life, and I loved what you sat me, so thank you because it did not go unnoticed and I really appreciate it now. Let's get into today's episode. I can't tell you what a treat what a pleasure it is to have. Jason Mraz here. He is a Grammy Award winning multi platinum artists, singer, songwriter and musician I'm sure most of you have heard his incredible songs like I'm yours, or maybe you have one of his many albums like waiting for my rocket to come Mr ADC we sing, we dance. We steal things. Love is a four letter word, and he just released his newest album. Look for the good, and it came out on my birthday just a couple of days ago. It's incredible what he's been up to, and we're going to talk about everything that's going on with him and what inspired his newest album I? Really want you guys. Guys to go check it out. We'll have links to it in the show notes. Jason Honoree of the Songwriters Hall of fame. He's on the board of as CAP, and he has sold millions of records, which is not surprising because his music is exceptional, he's also an entrepreneur and a therapist. In Two thousand eleven, He created the Jason Mraz Foundation to support inclusive arts education, and the advancement of equality, and it has donated over a million dollars to organizations that are for that mission, plus he has morass family farms, which is an agricultural co-op that's committed to peace in the world, organic, regenerative agriculture, fair trade and kind words. It's all so in line with who he is and what he stands for. Everything about him is really part of his mission his life's work. It's all really about being here. Being present and making the world a more beautiful whole lovelier place for all of us, he is a gift, and he is here to share his goodness and generosity with you so without further ado, please welcome, the one and only incredibly kind incredibly good Jason Mraz. I Jason. Hi I'm so happy that you're here. I was telling my sister. This morning I said you know why I'm so intimidated by him. said it's not that no special and his music is so good. I said it's. He's kindness personified I, while I'm flattered, and I'm touched to be recognized that way. But I'm I'm human as well you know so I. I still get grumpy and they still get stressed out. But by the time it gets to the music or what what happens on stage, or in the world I hopefully have worked out all those kinks in those grumpy part, but I tell you music. The thing that keeps me blessed and I think I'm too blessed to be stressed so. Well all of that is just so like you to say see. That was a really humble response, but that that is what makes it so heartbreakingly beautiful because obviously. It takes courage to see the good, which is so much a part of your report now and so much a part of you, but my first question is how early in your life did you have this little? Stealing like I think I wanna be doing music when I grow up or did you not know that 'til later? It was pretty early when I was seven years old in second grade. We were basically introduced our first music class and I had a piano in my home, and my mom played the piano and would sit at the piano at a very young age and. Show me how to play chords and. Play, it progressively make some noise on it. which I always loved. And then by second grade when we had music class at school. I felt I. I'm familiar with this music thing I liked it and then music teacher asked me to sing something by myself in the room in front of all my classmates. And it was silent night it was it was a Christmas song and. And she loved it and went and got another teacher or others from the schoolhouse. Listen to this. And it gave me this feeling of I'm being seen and heard Yeah House special. And I didn't know then that I would make a career out of it, but that was definitely the start i. knew something I loved I wanted to keep doing it. Keep doing it, and by the time I was in high school. You know I continued to take music electives. When there was career day in that opportunity to kind of figure out what you WanNa do in college. I was so confused that nobody else wanted to go in the entertainment industry. I just assume everybody would want to do that. It seems like a circus, but yeah. I knew pretty early on and it. Just everything just kept lining up that I had the opportunity to continue to pursue that dream. You know such as having music and public schools for example. In unity that makes it easy for kids like me to get the tools. I need to keep going forward. And eight grade when I started to finally have feelings for girls. Started to write. Poetry that could be aligned with music, and in fact, the first song I feel like I wrote the first real like Oh. Yeah, this is something was I took an instrumental cassette tape from CNC music. Factory remember expands. T music factory. There was an instrumental on side B. And I wrote my own lyrics, my own song that instrumental and I recorded my voice with it onto another cassette and I took that cat to. America and on Friday night where we would all go roller skating on. My God I love it. Wow, I. I got them to play the cassette, so I got to hear my first recorded. Or Jam at the Skating Rink and because it was already CNC music factory. Nobody really notice. They just kept skating, you know. But it was my voice on the track and. It was eighth grade, and that was a real just moment for me. This is I. can do this I want to do more of this. That's amazing I love that music. Factory of all of all the artists at an internal attracted I can just think gonNA. Make you sweat right. Isn't that their song here? Of course they're the one that instrumental, and Jason Mraz is writing his first song to enforce, that makes sense. It is amazing. Amazing what you just said about when you sit down and you create something, and it's kind of part improvising, and there's a line in in the Broadway musical of Charlie and the chocolate factory, and he says Willy Wonka says Charlie you know what we both do you and I. We make something out of nothing and I think about how much you've made. And it's like how many songs just keep coming out of you. It's magic. Magic, it is absolutely magic, and I've been through waves in my life where I think that's gotta be it. There can't be anymore. That flows through this Taub. And yet and yet the patients through more adventure experience just or even just stopping and reading a book the next time I go back to turn on. That tap more comes out of it. Just this infinite resource. And all it is is the same twelve notes on an active and. And the same twenty six letters in in our alphabet incredible just rearranged in new ways. Absolutely magical, and your your ability to create melody is just off the chart, and it's also you because I heard carole king say a longtime ago. That songwriting is just having something to say really having something to say and. There's this unrelenting goodness inside of you and it's kind of like it feels as though. You constantly feel the need to share that goodness. It's like it doesn't let you sleep. Does it feel like that like you want that out in the world? Yes, and I'm sure there's both good reasons than bad reasons for that A good reason is I wanted to use my superpowers for good. Yeah, I've been given the greatest wealth which is people's time and attention and if they're going to give me that time and attention. What am I gonNA? Do we have them? I going to respect that time attention? How am I going to inspire them in that few minutes of their time and attention? Or How am I going to acknowledge them in? Just try to relate to them in that time so I've learned through the years to truly respect that time and attention and want to be good at what to be better in given that spotlight. And if I go all the way back to early in my career. When my songs get, make as much sense, and they weren't as clear on the goodness. It was even if all the words weren't fully there. It was some version of. I want this to be good I. wanted to sound pretty. I don't have all the words yet, but I'm GONNA. Make some noise right now that. I need to make and this is what I said. If these seconds ago, that for probably good and bad reasons, good being I value the listener and the bad reasons is, and it's not bad. I just needed to have a contrast of light and dark hair, but the bad is being. going all the way back to my divorced parents and five years old. And From five years old, I had a suitcase packed and on the weekends I would go to my dad's and I'd stay with my dad and I'll know weekdays at go back to my mom's and so. From five years old I learned how to touring artist. Pack a suitcase and hit the road. And in that in between when you have two very loving and hardworking parents. There's also the sort of. No Fault of theirs, but there's this ability kind kinda. Get lost between the two households to kind of. Not feel fully seen to not feel fully heard, and you also have siblings at the siblings to the formula, and we're all competing for our parents attention. We're all competing for our family attention and for each other's attention and so. I think that gets woven into the fabric of the instrument of my being. and. When I show up to sing, it's still connects to that version of look at me. Listen to me, I think that's why one Carol King says you have something to say and so for those sort of dark and almost sad reasons. This. Human Child in me. That was I just WanNa be seen and I in I've gotta make noise to say it and. When I'm in my twenties. I'm I'm Kinda doing that same thing. In my early twenties I'm writing all kinds of weird poetry. That maybe doesn't fully make sense, but I'm certainly trying to bring it together. To Mimic. Poetic Heroes. Or to Jeff Start more of a jazz artist with my singer songwriter style. But over time I've felt like I've really tried to find a tune how I how I use all of that And and I know I'm not final I know I've got a long way to go. Yeah, it's so beautiful and. So often, I feel like people's paying turns into their purpose. You know if that hadn't been the beginning of your story. Yeah, maybe you would have been You know a Barista, and you'd be fine, but there's this feeling of like I gotta get this out and thank. God, because how many lives you touched I mean. It's unbelievable to wrap your head around. How many lives you've touched how many people used your song when they propose to their love of their life? How many people listen to your music when they're feeling down? How many people who drove with you? Cross country like you are literally that little kid with that little suitcase like kills me to think of that image and. And how sensitive of a soul you are, so you were picking up on everyone's feeling, so you were holding it, I could probably yes, so that's a lot for a little kid to feel all of that, but look what that's done for millions and millions and millions, and so you went to San Diego, and you started playing in the coffee shop scene and What's the story like? How does that first thing come together, so I'd say senior in high school in my first year in college which I went to a musical theater college in New York City. I started playing guitar. And that was where my magic talent on piano. which I really wasn't that gifted but I, could make things up. Up Song, It really starts to blossom on the guitar. So I put the guitar I when I was about freshman in college and I basically dropped out of college. At that same time mentally dropped out of College Spiritually disconnected from college now I'm going to play the guitar and my roommate in College. My roommate actually said to me. Do you should just be a Rockstar? It's all you need to do. quit school. Go right your song. It'd be a Rockstar deal, no big deal and in a way. I kind of took them up on that I. Dropped out of school I focused on music I was in New York, city at times had moved back to Virginia where I'm from and I spent about three or four years with my head down, just taking odd jobs working on guitar and working on songs like giving myself the time I needed to grow. Without putting myself in front of audiences, and and basically without tried to talk myself out of it, because they anytime, I ran into somebody from high school and Oh. What are you doing back in town? It's like I'm working on my music. They would look at me weird like Oh. Yeah, your music, good luck with that. I never wanted to be discouraged. I believed in myself I said you know it just is GonNa? Take some time so after about four years that I decided to take a trip to California, four adventure for inspiration just to see a completely different world I'd never been to the west coast. So I drove out to the west coast. It was meant to be a short trip and I never laughed. I, thought, this is incredible out here. The weather's incredible. The geography and the topography of the land is so different than the east coast. There's fruit trees. There's just a whole different. Diversity out here that was really stimulating for me as a writer and I didn't know anybody, and so not a single person could tell me I was doing the wrong thing with my life and I love that. Yeah, so finally you know that little kid with the suitcase was free to make his own home. However, he could and. I was staying with friends who had friends who had friends. That turned me onto some interested individuals I was living in. San Francisco with an ex. Girlfriend who was continues to be a friend of mine. And her boyfriend her new boyfriend had. Friends in the music industry and said Hey we're going to go to a party in Vegas I want you to bring your guitar because you never know who we're going to see. So I went to this Vegas Party. Took my guitar plan and Hotel Room and I didn't know it that at the time, but in the room that night would be my future manager of my future booking agent no. No they saw yeah, so they saw me playing just entertaining people. And the next day one of them approached me and Said who are you? What are you doing was like well I! Don't really know I'm Kinda. I've just moved to California looking for opportunities. And they directed me to San Diego. They said well hey. San Diego has a cool music scene. We have some friends that have studios there. Would you be interested in going down there and checking that out? Just ensure why not I'm on an adventure. went to San Diego. I recorded a couple of songs at a guy's house. And we quickly realized I. Don't have any experience. I'd been living quietly in Virginia with no. Real? Communication to the outside world not. Not Not really recording. and. I basically got a big reality. Check like I can Kinda of thing, but my songs aren't really there and. I don't really know what I'm doing I. Got I got hone it in. So I stayed in San Diego. And because I got introduced to the coffee shop music scene there. And in that coffee shop music scene. Were AJ crunchy the son of Jim Crow Chief Gregory page phenomenal songwriter. Steve, Pulse Jeff Berkeley Lisa standards. There was Carlos Omega there was this large cast of amazing songwriters and in audience, for Songwriters and I couldn't believe it because it wasn't your typical nightclubs, there wasn't your rock and roll bars. It was all ages copy shops. It was listening rooms and it was people like me telling stories through song. So. I became a DIV OT of these songwriters, and I started hanging out these coffee shops, and eventually I was working at the coffee shops. Run the divorce running sound until finally the owners really trusted me and believed in me enough to let me have my own time on stage. And it took about a year and a half to really earn their trust by working to open mic nights and songwriter nights and just. Just constantly showing up. But by the time they gave me my own night I started to have a little audience that was into what I was up to and that was really my first big break. I was getting my own little spot at the coffee shop because I grew from that point I grew. Fast. I was selling out my Thursday nights at Java Joe's the coffee shop there and I started recording my shows. And putting my shows, my songs on the radio in San Diego, and this was all thanks to that. Gentleman's in the LAS, Vegas. Hotel Room who had kept an eye on me through all those years, then when I was finally ready and I got my show in my act. Together I went back to them and said okay. I think ready. We started this, you know. Send my songs to the local San Diego Radio, station, and eventually electro recording company got got hold of some of my demos. WOULD YOU WANNA? Make an actual studio record. And, it just Kinda grew from there. And It's been a series of small big breaks and. In those are kind the external breaks of of the other people in your life who to help champion your career. And for me, the personal big breaks still happen on the page. They still happen on the stage. It takes showing up and writing something. That's like ooh. This is going to add so much fire to my show and also being able to have the improvisation or the storytelling. Show is also going to add some fire to the show and. That continually put fuel in my show and gave me. Some energy to keep going and keep growing I had a really nice big break. Right before my first album came out which I was playing in a parking lot at a Dave Matthews show in. The Gorge in Washington didn't really cool venue. We were given this Gig in the parking lot. Three days we spent the first day just setting up the gear. We never got found made I think we played one song. and I said to the crowd who is all waiting to go into the amphitheater I, said well. That's all the time we have and a guy in the crowd yells back. Thank, God. Humiliating Yeah. So the next day. We got set up and we're playing in it then. Okay, mixed crowd, it's they're watching us, but they're really just there to go in and see Dave Matthews. Well then Dave Matthews comes out. He comes out, and he gets up on our stage with us, and he basically just by him being there. gives us this endorsement of Hey. These guys are cool Put your attention over here. Give Him some love. He took my guitar. He played some songs. And of course this is my hero, and a picture of it of that moment ended up in Rolling Stone magazine and they put the headline on. That picture was Dave's fave. And I don't know if that was true or not but. It gave me kind of validation that that was national national validation. Whereas prior to that, it was really just this little San Diego Regional Kid. Yeah, no! So, that was probably my biggest I would say biggest break was having notoriety from Dave Matthews Rolling Stone, and then my album came out about a week later. And it pretty well. People kind of started to pick up on what was up to. Follow that up with just years and years of touring that just stay present. It's been hard work, but it's been my dream job. You know I. I wanted to be in the circus. I wanted to be an entertainer. I wanted to sing songs I wanted to say something. And I I learned how to get into that world where I can create all of those opportunities. Yeah, it's amazing I. I don't know why but I. IT brought tears to my eyes I. Actually cried when you just told that story about that headline, because all those years when you didn't know that was coming, and you were just working at the copy job China prove yourself like that took so much courage, so many people give up right then because they don't know what's promise. They don't know what's coming and you have to be willing to put in that time and play those shows and care enough about. About the six people at the coffee shop who are listening and keep going back and you did all of that and then continue to like I think people think that. As soon as you get a record deal, you know it takes care of itself forever, and it's not true. It's like it's concept. There's no arrival and to be able to be swimming in this world and staying so true to your genuine soul and working this hard. It's so unusual that you John Everything. You've done and and stayed yourself like what helps you stay grounded in that? How did you not get swept into all that noise? When I was in high school I worked from my dad who ran offense companies, which means you know? We dug holes and he built fences that kept dogs in that surrounded tennis courts that were fences privacy. That's around people's yards. Beautiful Craftsmanship Labor and for a while I was his only employees. And it was really hard and I. Look over and see my dad digging holes and when he did it for. Thirty some years before he became a mailman in. To Post Office to get the better benefits and. Cause Defense Business in the wintertime. It's hard to get the work. and. I would seeing on the job and my dad would do the typical parent thing and say son go do that. Go do what you love, and if you do what you love, you'll never work day in your life. And so my dad was always a champion for my career and following my music because he saw that I loved it and I had a talent for it. So in a way that was my goal when I quit college shortly thereafter and I started focusing on just my music I worked as a janitor I worked for the post office 'cause. Dad Got me a gig there. I worked a tobacco shop I worked a lot of different odd jobs. All knowing that one day I'm going to be a musician and I'm not gonNA. Have this traditional day job. When I got to the coffee shops three or four years later. And I'm working in the coffee shop playing music couple of nights a week. I had made it that to me. Was the finish line I said Oh, my God. I don't have a day job. This is my, Gig. All I have to do now. Is Book Enough Gigs to to pay my bills? And, so I would work to three or four coffee shops a week until I was really doing enough business that one or two coffee shops only that I didn't have to bounce around the city so much. and. It wasn't Madison Square. Garden or anything like that. That didn't matter what matter to be with me and music we are. We're intimately arriving. We're intimately connected. We are doing what we were meant to do. And I didn't have any expectation or dream beyond that coffee shop stage I never did. Everything that's happened since then has been this freak bonus. Trying to dream yeah, it really happened, and I think that that is credit to those influencers, I've met in that Vegas Hotel Them Bill Silva and Mardi Diamond Bill became my manager and he managed me for eighteen years. And Marty diamond was booking agent for just as long. and. These guys once I was really established in the coffee shop. They were able to take that and helped me take to the next level. But in my mind, I was already where I to be. I never needed to go any further. Because the music is the reward and being challenged to to write new songs for the stage. That's that's the work. And having something to say that's meaningful. That's the work. The getting around from city to city and touring and the venues getting bigger, and all that that's the music business, basically just going bananas, and that's managers and agents and lawyers doing all of that stuff. That wasn't really who I am, so I was able to go through that and go through this motion. Play all those different venues, because really they were no different than the coffee shops. I didn't have to believe anything different about myself to play. Royal Albert Hall Versus Java Joe's Coffee. Shop, I just had to do the work. The agreed performer right good songs, etcetera, and in the back of my mind. I always thought all of this could go away. One day I've seen careers rise and fall. I'm not going to believe that I'm supposed to be. In these big big venues, my whole life, because at any point it could go away and I'm going to have to go back to that coffee shop. And I actually never stopped going to those coffee shop so when the tour would end, I would go back to this coffee shops and keep playing my coffee shop shows. Or when I had new music that I was working on I go to the coffee shop I and test the songs out there. So that really helped me not change because the real church, the Real Garden of songwriting and entertaining for me. Was the little coffee shop. That was really where. The small audience doesn't have room for your big ego. You know they want to hear the song they WanNa see who you are and I think that really helped me stay who I am and yeah, and respect the other songwriters in this region, and you know I I love that your podcast is about. Quit Your Day job because me. Being married to music is the greatest day job I could ever have. That's the gift so when I was working for the post office in these awful hours at like four in the morning to noon. They wasn't great, but the rest of my time from noon one o'clock onto the evening was being music, and it was everything I thought one of these days. If I can just eliminate those agonizing hours working for somebody else. I'll have more. Time to spend with my muse, but I also had to respect that I needed to pay check, and I needed something to at least get me to that next level. Yeah, it makes so much. I took a class at Ucla they have this mindful awareness research center. A couple years of classes there and there was a whole study they did on how people attach their happiness to outcomes, and so they've done these studies where they find that the day after someone wins an Oscar or a grammy. They were like depressed. Because didn't necessarily make them any happier. But when you're happy, because you just WanNa, make the thing like when making the thing. What makes you happy? You're rich. You're there and like I will leave you so totally when you say working in those coffee shops in getting this just sing and play those sets, and that's how I paid my rent. You're like I was so satisfied. That's it. You're one of the very few people that you. You've been so rich the whole time because just here year. Up My roommate and I used to say that like early on in the early coffee shop days when we really only had enough money just to live like no going to the movies, no going out to eat, we just had enough. We would still say we're the richest poor people we know. Because? We still had a great quality of life. You know we were still showing up at the shows and playing and entertaining and entertaining ourselves, even when there was no audience around, and you can put the guitar the instrument on your or your craft, whatever it is that it is your dream. If you can sit. And be with that dream. Be Doing the action of that train. That's it. You might as well be women like scrooge mcduck and his big. Old Coin. Yeah. This so I i. feel like they've done studies to find out that the greatest regret of the dying is that they feel they didn't live life on their terms. Do those things that they really wanted to do and I think because so many people are so thirsty to to feel like themselves and to recognize themselves when they look in the mirror, and they spend most of their time so distracted from like wait. Is this you I am? I was told get a job. Get a four one K. and I'm like miserable, and I have this thing I've always wanted to. To do, but what happens after I've talked to so many people listening. There's this courage that they feel. It's a courage problem. It's like I. Don't WanNa. Put My workout because I'm worried that like it's not great. I compare myself to Ed Sheeran and Jason Mraz who the hell am I to write a song. I compare myself to all these other authors. Who Am I to write a book Midas? Oh something. What do you say to those people who compare themselves who are not even willing to make anything unless it's perfect, they don't WanNa. Be Mediocre, terrified to take a stage at an open mic. It's like I. think that that's the number one thing I see standing in people's way is this needs to be perfect or they're not going to do it at all. I mean in the beginning. You're writing every song. Wasn't your number one single and you still wrote them and performed them. And how did you give yourself the grace to to work things out? Yeah I would almost. So naive to think that this was gonna work out like in a way. I guess there was an arrogant to like what I do with different like. Yes, I still emulate my heroes I still have style that sounds like this, or there's this that already exists in the world, but it's still my own version of it. But what I have come to learn and appreciate later in life, which I didn't have at the beginning at the beginning. I think I just had sort of naive arrogance. And as well as I didn't WanNa be my dad I didn't WanNa. Work right taking holes my whole life. I didn't WanNa have the day job so that was that to? What I have discovered later in life. Is that my life experience? How I experience, life is going to be the culmination of. Many things they're all going to be this sort of the convergence of my body. My speech. My beliefs. My actions. And my attitude. Right and these are five certified different lanes. And it's important to know that our thoughts and our speech are in alignment with our beliefs right or that our actions are in alignment with our speech. like there's these five different things we're juggling, and so if we can get them all on the same page, our thoughts, speech, beliefs, accents and attitude. You get them on the same page. Then we could just flow in our life experience. We can just sort of really. Right and what I have found is when I'm living my dream when I'm working on a song writing the song or performing a song or recording a song something to do with music, but when I'm really working with music, all of those. Things are lined up. And my life experience is at its fullest at its most potent. And if I'm not doing music, if I'm working for somebody else, or if I'm doing somebody a favor I might have four five of those things in alignment, but maybe my attitude, a little loss because I'm not really living my dream so. What I found that is if I live my dream. It actually better serves. My Soul my purpose and it serves others it says everybody around me because attitudes are going to be better and I'm GonNa be more pleasant person where everybody else? So for someone that doesn't I guess, have the courage or the experience of yet. I just tell them just the way about what other people think you know. It's none of your business. What people think of you? You cannot ever control that like I'll never know who likes my songs, and who doesn't like my songs, but that's really not part of my life experience. My life experience going to be my own thoughts I love the Song I love the process. My own speech like what am I saying on a day to day basis about myself or my musical one of my thing and my music. You know my beliefs and my belief systems are far and wide, and they're always changing like. My beliefs on spirit, my beliefs on politics, my beliefs on myself my relationship, my beliefs are always changing so using music as a way for me to understand using my dream my art form. As a way to always understand how my beliefs are evolving my actions, clearly when I'm creating my music. My actions are definitely being used because I have to play piano to play guitar after learn how to use my technologies, I have to show up at my desk and really demonstrate the act of being with my. The time that it takes to write a song. and then my. Has To be you know grateful and and sharpen positive and all those things so I guess I encourage people who are. And don't have the competence to forget everyone else and just be your biggest fan and go in the. Enjoy the romance of discovering at. Discovering Yourself. Enjoy the romance of the challenges in the struggles in knowing that your adding your. Pain and tears and hours and sweat and word to the Pantheon of poets and writers that have come before you, but I i. do believe that this can be applied to anyone pursuing dream is you've just gotTa Reward Yourself? By forgetting what you think, the world thinks because. Never know that that's an impossible task. Yeah and. Enjoy the ride. Enjoy the journey. Enjoy the pain enjoy. Enjoy seeing your cluttered desk or your cluttered kitchen. Only the result of making something great out of nothing you know. I was just doing a project like I love having a clean desk because it sort of sets me up for my next thing. But. I was just doing a project the other day when I walked into my office and it was just destroyed like because I kept running into. Grab this grab that and got a lot of grab this I. Need This instrument I need this cable and I gotta openness and fix US and. It, the room was just in disarray, and I took a moment to appreciate it. 'cause like Oh. Yeah, this only happens when I'm making something really big. And it was it was really a feeling moment, and then last night I had this feeling moment of cleaning it up. Just like I'm GonNa tie this up and I'm GonNa get ready, and when I came back in today and we're having this conversation, I'm I'm really pleased like now. I'm ready for my next one, so there's always a little beautiful things that come with living your dream that you don't expect. all the preparation cleaning of your tool. Like washing your dishes, and there's all these beautiful steps in it that keep unfolding the deeper you dive into your dream. You'll. You're not going to be bored and you're not going to be broke. Your dream is going to give you so much. I can give you so many tasks and it's GonNa. Give you so much return. That, so we're trying yeah work. Trying Oh my God so many amazing gems in what you just said about. And in this time during Cova said, it's interesting how we keep talking about like essential business. What's essential and I feel like people are getting this great big paws right now, which in some ways is an opportunity to say? What is really essentially me? Like what do I? WanNa go back to? What do I not want to go back to what? Do I do when I have free time. That may be really needs to be born and mean little. Did you probably know that this album you wrote called? Look for the good would come out in this moment. And how do you feel about saying something like that? In the midst of so much? That's going on for people. How can we look for the good when we feel? All, my Gosh, this all so bad. It's so much darkness right now. People are losing their jobs. You know what are your thoughts around it because it seems like it's uncanny that this is coming out right now. And so needed. Well? I was already feeling that we were already spinning out in a weird. Devastating Direction last. This whole administration it's very. Than previous generation Marie administrations. And not everyone is being treated equally and fairly. So I already was approaching. This album from something is way off here and we have a long way to go on equality. We have a long way to go on planetary sustainability and regeneration. So how can we still look for the good in these dark times? I did not expect it to get darker, and it has yeah, but people were already losing their jobs. People were already getting sick. People were already being brutalized by the police like there was already a lot of darkness in the world so. Look for the good. That whole album would was in a way sort of my personal response to. Okay. World is challenging place that the surface of the earth is a volatile dangerous environment. We're lucky to be here at this remarkable stroke of good weather. Because the history of the planet has shown the earth to look like a snowball at least six times. So. Who's to say that couldn't happen again? So the environment is crazy. We also have humanity just getting bigger and bigger and bigger, and and struggling to sort of know itself, and to share the surface of the earth, so regardless of covid earth itself, and being human on earth is, it's tough. and. I go to my dream. I go to my music as my solace as my little space. And I breathed life into the song. To help me try to understand the world. And the way, maybe a bird does I don't know what the bird is thinking, but the bird sits on this little tree outside my studio, and it seems that song then it's like to me. It looks as if the birds got it. Made you know birds like singing? Little Song they sitting in a tree. Little do we know? The bird is running from my cats and little. Do we know the bird trying to hide from the bigger birds 'cause hawks out. Here will eat little birds. You know everybody's got something creeping up on them that. Could take them out at any moment, and that thing is time. Time is creeping up on all of us. So so I? Write songs that try to help us. Think about those things too much, but appreciate those things. Look for the good. You know like we could say. We're all GONNA die. That's not really looking for the good now. Instead we can say hey. Let's take a deep breath together. You feel that. Life? That's life. You just breathe life in. Can I do with these next breath? We're only given a limited number of these breath, so we gotta catch as many as we can. And Music is such a great medium to catch breath, because if we sing along with music than we're breathing consciously with that music, we're breathing. Lyric Anna Thought and a belief in an action, and maybe even it changes our attitude. You know it's we're back to that whole life experience thing music is such a potent thing so. You know I'm writing this. Look for the good album to try to hopefully influence our breathing and influence our actions, and our attitudes, and I should also just backtrack for a second. I still am never going to know. WHO's GonNa? Listen to this and who is going to really breathe consciously and have their life changed by the music I don't know. I have to maybe assume a hundred people MAC I. Don't think that many people. It's not up to me to decide. It's really to decide, but what I'm getting out of the process. And I think this what your podcast is about? Is Because I. write this album then I've taken care of all these months of my life living my dream taking care of myself living my dream. I don't know what the future holds really, but for me the future hold riding another batch of songs writing to be comfortable in a very volatile life, because the surface of the earth is dangerous, humanity can be dangerous. But as long as I'm working on my dream. I don't get overwhelmed by those things. Yeah, and I can breathe life into something that's positive and and loving and kind, and and I turn to Mr Rogers as a resource. Yes, I, look at how he lived his life, but I looked at him because in the last couple of years I've really come to see. He was like a Dalai Lama of our culture. In his goodness of his kindness in his ministry, but he never put on the the ministers close. Did it through entertainment through television. And he had a staying or came out of an interview when a child asked him. What do I do when I see bad stuff on the news? And Mister. Rogers said well look for the heroes. You know, don't look at the bad part of that story. Look at the good part of that story. You know that there's a there a courageous men and women that are gonNA. Go in and fight. The bad guys are. They're going to fight the forest fires, or they're going to help clean up after a flood. So we can look for the good. And so I'm not trying to be naive in my work and say nothing's wrong. I'm trying to say. Something is. Okay we're still okay. You know despite the fact that there's a lot that. Scary, out there, yeah, this is a really challenging topic to talk. About I like it, but because I write about this is what gives me, comfort. In my life. Throughout my career, I feel like occasionally I'll be criticized for just trying to write these sunny songs, and as if nothing in the world is wrong, but I I know a lot about the world is. is suffering in life. There will always be suffering. But if I sit down and work on my dream, I said I work my craft, and I can take care of the suffering in my heart and if I do that. And it works for me I have a transformation and I feel somewhat healed by, and words are powerful. Then I have to think think okay. Maybe somebody else will get. A similar transformation and or encouragement from this work. Yeah, I'M GONNA put this work out there and just see what happens. It's. Listening to you, talk as music. It's like a symphony I. Don't know how you choose your words how you can tell it. You're saying these things. In this moment you are so connected, and it is like Mister Rogers I saw that movie on my birthday a couple years ago and it was like a religious experience like listening to you right before. You said that I was like you're like that. You're like such a teacher. Preacher or Rabbi Agoura like you have such wisdom, and it's it comes from. It's my grandma used to say she's just say it's so easy to find. Find the bad. You have to look for the good, and you do such a good job of it I wanna ask you one more question because I'm dying. No, you've done so many amazing, cool, special sparkly things, but what was it like for you to beyond Broadway in waitress? What was that like I think I was scared for two or three days, not not not at Broadway, but but probably packing my suitcase and getting ready to move to New York. If you mind right because I was thinking oh man. They're counting on me to show up every day and be great. And I had only worked for myself for the past two decades. And I was scared. Yeah, for a couple of days, and then once I got there. They gave me about three weeks of rehearsal a very intense rehearsals. Like let's do it again. Do it again doing. So by the time you take the stage. You know it backwards and forwards you know it inside and out, so I wasn't nervous at the time that started and in fact I quickly buried quickly fell in love with it inside. Oh I could do this for a long time. And this is props to Sarah and Jesse Nelson who wrote the script, but it was a funny show. It was a lovely show. It was a romantic show. It was an authentic show there was so much goodness to this show, and and everything that my character did was clumsy, knee and beautiful, and it got laughs and was really sweet, so I loved my character. I got to really connect with my character. And I didn't have to tore during that period I just had to take a subway back and forth and. And the feeling of being able to walk into one of those stage doors remember I went to Musical Theater College Yeah Yeah. When I was eighteen I lived in New York. City and I would go down to the theatre district and I learned that at intermission everybody comes out and smoke cigarettes, and then they all flood back into theatre, while we would go down and we'd smoke cigarettes at Intermission, and then we'd, we'd walk into the theater. We Watch act to free. And it was a neat little thing and. We'd stay after and see the stage door I did idolize Broadway for a moment when I was about eighteen so to do that. At forty years old was a dream. Come true it. Honestly, it felt like a vacation because my real life living my dream is hard work I show up I work I plan the tours I. write songs I have to figure out what my show purposes. But when I'm doing Broadway I'm doing somebody else's dream I'm living somebody else's story, but I actually loved it. It was a nice break from what I normally do so I would do it again. Character was right towards right. I would definitely do it again. You know I'm I'm waiting for that Mister Rogers. Musical Yeah! Perfect for you. Oh, my God I love to hear like it was like a vacation like being a star in a Broadway show and I love that you went to amd left dropped out then you don't even audition, you get asked. Do you WanNa play this part short. Line! You just get asked to play the part Of course you. Do you know what and I even had that I moved out of New York, when I was nineteen I actually left on my birthday, my nineteenth birthday, and drove back to Virginia and part of me felt like a failure because I was giving up on this dream of being. Musical Theater, actor or musician on that path. And felt like a failure, but in the back of mind also said you know what I'm going to come back to New York. And I'll go back when they want me there. and. It worked you know. One years later. I went back because they wanted me there yeah. Yeah. That's what New York musical theatre. Kids should here. Dr And they'll just be offered apart. That's the better way. Don't stand in line and just become famous on me amazing and you'll be asked you're beyond beyond beyond. There's no word for you except for sweet and generous and awesome, and thank you a million times for sharing the space with me. I can't even put it into words what it was like. Just get to be with you. Tell us where we can find the record. Tell us where we can find you I. mean it's pretty obvious. Yeah, you'll find look for the good on apple music. And I've tried to get the music out everywhere. Music is heard, and I'm still a fan of collecting records, so you can order a vinyl. Jason? Mraz, DOT, com and listen to the new reggae albums side inside. Be On your record player as well so it's everywhere I hope and thanks for mentioning it. Oh Yeah. No problem. Thank you for being so gracious, and we'll bring gonNA, spread the word, and by that album when it comes out, thank you Jason. Appreciate it, thank you. It's really lovely talking to you today. I got a lot out of this well, it's such an honor to have him here such a treat here are the takeaways number one use your superpowers for good. You've been given the greatest wealth of people's time. Time and attention. What will you do to respect that and inspire acknowledged and relate to them number to do what you love, and you'll never work a day in your life number three. If you can sit and do the action of that dream than. You've arrived number four. Don't worry about what other people think be your biggest fan, go in and enjoy the romance of discovering yourself. The challenges and the struggles enjoy the ride. Number five embrace all the beautiful steps that keep unfolding as you dive into your dream. Number six take a deep breath and breathe life in were only going to get a limited number of breaths. Catch as many as you can and make the most of them. Number seven you never know who get encouragement from your work, so you have to put it out there and see what happens and number eight look at the good part of the story. Look at the good heroes look for the good. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for listening to this show I am completely clear that you have a zillion things you could be doing with your time, and it means the world because your time is your greatest resource. It means the world that you spend your time here, so thanks for being here. If you want to hear more incredible conversations like this, make sure you subscribe on Apple podcasts or every listen because we have awesome guests coming up and it's free subscribe. I. Don't want you to miss out also if you love this episode. Episode and I can't imagine how you couldn't love Jason Morales, but if you loved this, take a second right now and think to yourself. Is there somebody who would be inspired by this and go ahead and share the link with someone or posted on Instagram and tag me and tag? Jason and we can re share whatever you post. Thank you guys so much. I love you elite with a saga. Mine and I'll talk to you on Thursday, the podcast production of authentic for more INFO on advertising in this show visit, authentic shows dot com so many times so sir. So many times. Saying I needed to. But now. I. Call Them. Says I can't dance with. I'm alive. Also have. The courage! Don't you worry? One. Exceed. Got The harder? During the. Because so. The.

Jason Mraz New York City San Diego Virginia Dave Matthews WanNa Mister Rogers Jason Broadway Vegas writer depression California Cathy Heller Grammy Award Jason Mraz Foundation Jeff Berkeley Jason Honoree
Act Casual with Kelly Henderson & Chip Dorsch (Pet Peeve Words)

Velvet's Edge

19:02 min | 1 year ago

Act Casual with Kelly Henderson & Chip Dorsch (Pet Peeve Words)

"If you're a parent you know what happens when your child gets sick the coughs without covering their mouths the sneezes right into their siblings faces the touches of everything possible. No wonder the flu virus loves loves kids. They're the perfect spreader of germs and studies back this up. When one person gets the flu there is up to sixty percent of chance that someone else in their household may catch the bug but this flu season you can be a flu fodder with a flu shot for Mauger means. It's your shot to prevent your kids from getting sick in the first place to stop into your neighborhood walgreens. No appointment needed and it's free to a you with most insurance. This is Kelly Henderson. This is chip door and you are listening to acts casual on Velvets ed this week we were talking about. Let's call it. I Dunno language pet peeves for example words. People don't like to say or common mispronunciations. I would honestly even call some of these verbal tics. You know what I'm sayin' Dan. Literally we also talk about how you should handle it or cope. When someone in your life is guilty of these offenses. Here's casual okay okay so I got into annoying and annoying conversation. That's hard to say wow knowing conversation with a friend the other day because I said something like Oh my God it was literally worse and he said Okay it wasn't literate. Worse worse obviously happened in one of his pet appease as when people misuse the word literally. Have you heard of this well yeah. I mean I feel like it's definitely the were. It's it's seeped. It's way into like just popular use incorrectly yes with a F- for me I do probably ever use it and I have a friend who says literally which which I actually love but that annoys people even more but it got me thinking about all of the things that either people misuse or people say incorrectly incorrectly and how you handle it when you're in those situations like another one this other friend of mine really hates people say oh a hundred and ten percent or like a thousand percent guilty. Do you really can't be more than one hundred percent like that's the maximum to if you're what isn't that the point is you're like. I'm gonNA give this more. I'm going to go above and beyond. Oh Yeah I WANNA do that. That's how I feel about it but it annoys him so bad so I wanted it to get. This conversation started because this obviously happens a lot in our day to day and talk about how you handle it which I found very funny though because when I reached out to you about this you they were like Oh yeah I have a running list. Let's hear what do you got I have a friend that she and I sort of crack up especially when it's when we have other your friends that are seemingly educated people that say things wrong so I keep running list I've heard instead of ultimatum. I've heard ultimatum. I've seen this one written out instead of a work in progress uh-huh a working progress working like G. I. N. G. Working Progress in you like you're saying these are intellectual people. Well some of my fellow on facebook to that. I'm like that is too good. I'm writing down New Year's Revolution Russian bear. Have you never heard that amazing so amped up like what's your New Year's resolution. I mean it is like let's take over the world. It's the New Year yeah actually speaking of something so new Fang. Ye like so here's one that's actually pretty common ear regardless what irregardless people will be like irregardless. I'M NOT GONNA do it anyway. Disregard carcasses the word trying to make take the negative of it like while anyway but no regardless is the word people like irregardless is not a word irregardless irregardless. I hear all the time here's one. You've probably heard this fustrated instead of frustrated. I stated I straighten out our so. I haven't heard that one ever burdette. Maybe out with very smart people. I've heard viral instead of viral. He was a viral man. I think you mean verbal vural. I there was one night I was hanging out with somebody and they said instead of the word euthanasia they said Ethanol uh-huh and the sentence was he said something like well I can commit ethuanasia by throwing a curling iron our toaster in their bathtub and I was like that's not euthanasia that's murder and by the way it's euthanasia ethuanasia him so he needs to learn the word and the definition of a hundred percent. Oh was that good for you but at least one hundred and ten like this music so loud. I'M GONNA go death like death yeah. You've never heard anybody say death instead of Daf. Oh my gosh this is and I saw this on facebook out running errands and it was like spelled A. R. O. N. asks the May running errands. That was a joke right. I don't think so and then I've seen the use the misspelling of homophobic and homosexuals home of phobic and home of sexual why like when I saw both of them they were used in sentences like all these home of all these homosexuals around here like sexual sexual. 's The funny part is to me when people try to sound really smart by saying big words or things like that but then they yeah ethanol Asia Asia is good like band name like okay so when we really boring. It's slowly put you to sleep it or murdering so whenever what I said to you that you are. You told me you had this list. I was like you know what's so weird. I actually don't have a list and then I really sat down and thought about it and like my pet. PEEVES are not when people misused things. It's when people say eh for instance when I'm watching. This mostly happens when I'm watching like rappers be interviewed and they're like so it's Tuesday. You know what I'm saying and then it's like the sky is blue. You know what I'm saying. Got On saying what I'm saying. Is that the end of every sense I worked with and she's a friend of mine so I won't say any names but she says you know a lot. She doesn't say you know what I'm saying and she'll. I've heard I've counted it sometimes four times in a sentence. How is it even a sentence anymore. I don't know you know you know you better go yeah. I wonder if she hears it. Do you think they become such a part of their vocabulary very or whatever you want to say about that that they end up just saying it just like it's like it's like a part of them all right. You know when people say you have a problem with like you know what I'm saying. Okay my other one actually suppos-ably did you say that one but that's a good one suppos-ably so like with WBZ suppose it's supposedly people my sister says supposedly sorry Jenny for on you. I don't think she listened to podcasts on good so the other one is one one. I think you do to me a lot. Actually it's like I mean okay so there's you know what I'm saying and then it's like if I say oh wow. It's really hot outside today and someone goes. I know right and I'm like yeah right. That's why I said it so right but now now I find myself doing it. I'm I'm actually really sad about it. I think I started trading day. Maybe or maybe it's just when I get uncomfortable with strangers and I don't really know what to say. I'm like Oh this certainly acceptable thing to say. I think what I say. Though is you do you just read. Is that anybody that's my version of I've got friends that get I always say Gotcha back in tax like understood. Gotcha and people were like Oh right Gotcha also right word back a lot like instead of okay all right word. See those bother me. I mean those are actual words but these so when we're really just talking about pet peeves. I was doing some research earlier and then what came up was not actually like phrases that people say but it was words that people do not actually like to say like do you have any of that is why I mean. There's the most popular one in the world but I think there's a worst one than that one. Which one are you slow. Everyone hates moist but I I you think moisten is so much closer than voiced poison. It's like the act of getting moist now. I hate it. I just say real slow moisten. You should see his face when he's on my gosh table. You are correct the number. One word on this list by thought catalog is moist. Do you WanNa know what the second one is drip. No that's not not even on the list. That's weird drip drip drop drip. No the second most hated word for people to say as blog house like rude that is I mean. The irony in that is is pretty great but I get it because it's it's a new word so I think that there's probably a lot of people that think they're going to be misusing like because they don't know what bloggers and it's flog is weirder than blog or do you think of that. It's so overused like everyone's like Oh. I'M GONNA go out on the blogger. I need to do a blog or I'm blogging. I'm a blogger like it's so everywhere. It's oversaturated yet. It's probably that but I mean it's also kind of a weird sounding word blog blog. I wonder who came up with blog. I don't know but if you need to visit a good blog goal okay number three is I don't even say this lugubrious lugubrious that right do you know what that do. You know there's a Jason Mraz Song that uses that word. Why would you put that on a song. It seems that could be with you as what he says. I don't know what it means. Can you elaborate Ogle at Google well. What does lugubrious main. UBS means looking or sounding sat. Lange's mall looking or sounding saddened dismal since sad yeah. I would be really annoyed if I was in conversation so I'm GonNa go lugubrious today. Hey throw curling iron in your bathtub canoe. When I'm working out and eating right I start to feel kind of invincible but then October rolls around and I'm reminded that nobody is immune to flu season. When it comes to the flu the best thing you can do for your health is get a flu shot shot. A flu shot can help reduce illnesses doctor's visits missed work and school and prevent flu related hospitalizations so this flu season. Bia flew fighter with with the flu shot from Walgreens. It's your shot to protect you and the ones you love to stop into your neighborhood walgreens. No appointment needed and it's free to you with most insurance number. Four is yoke. I mean I see I get that one you know I think I'd probably say it wrong because it's not fun to say correctly. I say like Ed Yoke. USA Yoke drop the L. Yoke would say I do say folk music folk music. Oh maybe I'll just say folk music. Oh Wow learns in the nearby yourself linguist class or so number five. I think you're dealing with a little bit of this today but it's Flim so much phlegm him today. Number six is fetus. That is kind of a tough word. That's sad though born babies newborns well. I mean technically. It's a fetus yes wall. You're carrying but no one says like Oh. I can't wait to my fetus like that's true. It's only ever really used like postpartum. That's a a negative connotation fetus. Seven is heard I can see that eight is smear this mirrors I mean I don't mind smeared it. I'm GonNa tell you what I'd do. My Nine squirt scored. That's why I said trip. I think anything that sounds somewhat. Wet is anything that sounds somewhat mois yeah pink tip what I used to say. That was really grow selling pink tip those tools together I well. How did you ever figure those things because I think I was trying to figure out the grossest thing word drippy. Just little look inside. Your child taught in jail very odd. Ten is Chunky Levin is orifice or or I I don't. I can't even say that right orifice. It's a whole right. Yes correct. Thank you for that whole kind of gross word to. I guess it depends on how you're using it. Twelve is maggots thirteen vicious. These are fine to me. Fourteen queasy the I mean what fifteen is bulbous bulbous. Does that mean it means like big and round sixteen pustule. What does does that mean. I think a pustule is leg basically like a zipper as a pustule like it's a something that's holding us. I think it's still words that you you can envision like that word. I just now that you said that all I can think about is a very pus filled zip. Disgusting Seventeen is faster swim thing. Eighteenth Secrete nineteen is mind all of these kind of like Lena little sexual too I mean I guess it depends on where your mind wants to fall much. What's utilize a whole so you just put words together again so that one goes to number one twenty. I've heard this one before but I don't necessarily agree. It's very odd to me anybody panties. I think a lot of people have a problem with panties. I don't know I love seeing underpants. Just needed to put my underpants on. Describe your patties fannies. Don't wear panties right. I duNno I bet you there's some dudes. Column Panties Wow. Maybe may maybe that's maybe it depends too often that hates. QB Mary Hilliard it could be a bad memory but I feel like she hates the word. Pocketbook why I don't know I guess I grow this kind of a dumb name for a purse like pocket book like maybe what your grandmother would say yeah exactly but why a pocket book. It's not a pocket or a book here. I thought it was a wallet but K. We'll look into that and get back to a whole new episode of there. Is there anything you would like to add to. This list like any words you just cannot stand will remember there. was there was controversy. It's not this is going back to like misused things. There was controversy around that Atlanta's more set song ironic because she it was like wasn't actually used it incorrectly yeah had it's such a great song but like could you imagine if you'd written this big huge iconic song actually that is literally hurry song it has bad grammar in it too and did she have a song called you and me or me and I am not really fully familiar with with Katy Perry's. Leave that to my people okay but there was on the show. It's got incorrect grammar. I'll have to think of it. We can mentioned on the blog valve attach dot com and just keep plugging okay. So what do you do when people say things that you hate do you just let them go first like I do. I add it to my list. Okay Fair. Excuse me let me pull my notes. My pocketbook my pocket out of my pocket book. I don't I don't correct them. I'd like people even say my name wrong sometimes and I'm like get to meet you chip Rondo Comic Chris or something like that. It's like I don't know I just don't think I've never really thought a nice way to correct people like in just feel so bitchy to me and that's like I try not to be bitchy right and I probably should be a little bit here but uh-huh yeah just let people slide and then make fun of them on their back so maybe I am not the way to be itchy. I was just thinking if I did or not. I mean with my two. I can't really say anything to people because it's how they speak. You know what I'm saying. Well you're right. Maybe you'll think twice four. I do wonder if we're doing society a disservice by not speaking up. I mean I think in the future. I'm going to consider this. I do think it matters who it is like. If you're close to the person like I said to you you do this to me all the time but if it's Rando Stranger I mean I'm not gonNA waste my energy. I'm going to say let yeah you should do. I recommend it. I cracked my sister when she says suppos-ably yeah. She's close your sister but I don't like make fun of her. So it's like a different way of correcting. Oh yeah supposedly she'll be like what is it. I'm like it's supposedly well. I guess the moral of the story is keepers in take some deep breaths and if you're close enough after the person explained to them to really say the word people to tell me that right. I think I would want people to tell me I I just don't. Oh embarrass me. You know what I'm saying. Oh my God we gotta go. Okay emails your words or phrases that annoy you at casual at velvets edge DOT DOT com. We'll be back next week with more at Kaslo. Thank you for listening to this. Week's episode of at Casual on Velvets Edge. We'll be back every Friday with your act casual topic of the week remember to subscribe rate and review this podcast to ensure that you are the first to hear each episode. Also we want to hear from you. What are some things that make you. WanNa scream act casual or just topics. You think we need to discuss email us at act casual at velvet dot com and always remember to casual as you will. I'm Samantha Bari the Editor in Chief of Glam in our new podcast. She makes money moves. You'll hear women from across the country sharing their personal small stories about their salaries financial struggles and successes and the lessons. They've learned along the way I made about thirty thousand dollars for not going to be able to afford to keep the house. Eventually credit cards just got maxed out. She makes money. Moves is a production of glamour an iheartradio. Listen and subscribe at Apple Podcast iheartradio APP or wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Emily Warren | Songwriter of Choice for the Chainsmokers, Dua Lipa, Jason Mraz, & Shawn Mendes

Thrivetime Show | Business School without the BS

40:05 min | 1 year ago

Emily Warren | Songwriter of Choice for the Chainsmokers, Dua Lipa, Jason Mraz, & Shawn Mendes

"On today's show we interview the hit Song Right for the chain smokers Shawn Mendez duleep Jason Mraz and other pop music artists that dominate the charts during today's show Emily Warren shares with us how should use the money that she earned babysitting to pay musicians chance to start a band with her while just in middle school she explains how hint songwriters get paid and don't she explains how she gets over writer's block. She explains why she has a vocal coach and she shares with us about her fault of over two thousand unreleased Songs Ladies and gentlemen. You'RE GONNA love today's show. You don't need a celebrity narrator to introduce this show this show too may eight Kids Co.. Co created by two different women thirteen multi million dollar businesses ladies and gentlemen welcome to thrive time. Shaw now yes yes. Yes and yes bribe nation on on today's show. We have an incredible guest. She is a super successful songwriter. She's just getting warmed up. She's written hits for Shawn Mendez. The chain smokers I do Aletha Jason Mraz and she made a poor life choice and decided to be on today's show. Emily Warren welcome onto the thrive time show. How are you Ma'am thank you. I'm great. How are you well. I am. I'm just I'm so honored to have you on the show. It's it's so exciting and your career is. It's just beginning but you've had so much traction and I I wanted to start could asking you about this fifteen year old version of yourself whose baby be safer and you decide to pay a reggae band. I believe to become Emily Warren and the better tell us tell us about this story about babysitting money and starting the band yeah. I still basically my I had written a few songs. I just gotten into songwriting because the piano teacher mind was a song writer and I was watching her do it and actually had an awesome moment where I was like. Oh Wow people right sung and that's when I started writing and after I'd gotten see songs together my older brothers had a few friends who had been in a scar reggae band and they were in our house one day and they were walking out leaving and I was like well you guys play shows and now they're all like no long and I was like okay. What if I pay you and they said okay. We'll do it so I obviously I had no money. I was like a middle schooler. I think it was probably like thirteen or fourteen years old fifteen. Maybe Josh and started babysitting the neighbors to save up enough money so that I could pay them after did this show so that was that was kind of the beginning right there now you you pack the House. I understand you had a lot of parents that showed up to watch the kids right in your friends and your friends from school and how many people were there. You're packed house first first big gig with your hire mercenary band well. I mean I'll be honest. It's one of the smallest venues New York City in the village second second tiny tiny hole in the wall but there was the capacities probably like sixty okay with Catan. People were lined up around the door 'cause because like you said everyone had to come with their parents because we were all super young everyone. Everyone was a group of three so I I think that was the moment that the band who thought this is just like their friends little sisters thing where like Oh wow we're actually a full show. What will tell us does so you. You gained some traction. You're Kinda. gigging your plan. You're doing your thing. The band broke up. How did the ban break up. What what happened. Did you got into. Did you get into a creative dispute butte. Did you have different directions. You going was there. What what happened a little bit. I mean I think I was kind of at a point. Wait where I was. I just I mean by the time we broke up. We've been playing together for five or six years. around New York and I was hitting a point where I was realizing how important the writing part itself wants to me and I was writing the songs kind of pretty much by by myself and then I bring him to the pen and we flush them out and I think I don't know they a- they had a lot of kind of gigging mentality and I had a lot of writing mentality tally and it was just kind of we were clashing in that regard and and I was going to college and wasn't really sure how that was going to shake out in terms of being like a band of playing toying so it was it was not like dramatic really I mean I think we're all slightly disappointed in fact that something so fun was coming to an end but it was kind of a more natural thing if that point how did you get discovered via my space. What what happened where you just a the queen one of my space where you just How did you get discovered via via the vehicle my space I. I don't remember being particularly popular on Mike Base. I I just I mean we were really kind of speaking all around New York and I think I barely remember even using my space but but basically this woman named Ria Pasta show who was an Internet Atlantic records at the time she emailed to in my email address saying hey found emily and her band on my face with logs. Come check out a show and I was Kinda. Pending I was with my own manager from that email accounts seemed more professional doing persecution then we got to this show and she came and then she ended up. I didn't meet her. You bet she sent an email. After saying really good needs improve like could use some just like locking in basically but please stay in touch and then we kinda fell out of touch I mean I never really spoke to her again and it wasn't until the band split up and I was I got to college. I went to music school at Nyu. You so kind of all these kids around me who are doing and I remember having feeling like Oh. I just got here with the Cheryl or music with everyone everyone out thinking. I don't even know what to say. I'M GONNA get up and play my band. That's broken up. I basically starting at zero again so I went back to my dorm room that night and scoured my emails to see if I knew anyone that worked at a record label. I literally type then records into my research. Search email came up and I emailed her and said hey no. We haven't spoken in a while. I've just started kind of like breaking off by myself. I'm writing songs long. Starting right along with other people can send you if you are. Can I come in and meet with you and she said I'm actually not in New York anymore and I'm just switching jobs today to there were literally on that day for prescription songs in La but to send me stuff anyways so I sent her music and she immediately called me back like are you published. I manage to me get you out here and not kind of where the ball got rolling but it was all very cadets and kind of crazy that that's that's how we reconnected. No I don't expect utilize our show a lot but we have just kind of orientated to our bodies. We have about a half million folks. Listen to our show and most of them are archer preneurs aspiring entrepreneurs aspiring musicians people that are trying to monetize their craft and a a lot of people aren't familiar with how huge prescription songs was and is could you share what that would be like for people who are into music. That's incredible but can you explain for the listeners out that maybe don't understand how big of a thing. Dr Luke in prescription songs was and is at the time yeah of course I mean I I. That's pretty much the point I was that when she said prescription songs I had to Google it look and then it was like Oh Lucas Don on every single Katy Perry Song Riyan Brittany Miley every song that was on the on the radio at that point he had his hands and so it was like I couldn't even I mean and they they were just kind of starting the company so I couldn't even believe he was willing to sign someone and it was me it was kind. I don't like I remember rea- kept saying I'm GONNA play your songs for Lucan. I I remember laughing like there's no way she's playing my songs for like loose not getting your message and then and then he did and it is just like literally and I've looked him up and kind of knew everything was doing. You couldn't go anywhere without hearing. I mean I'd go out and his dunker playing the bar go to dinner. Sounds are playing in the restaurant like complete world domination. I I don't know if and if I if I miss categorizing I I've spent an unhealthy amount of time listening to your music and you're like you're like an artist song. You're you're a songwriter. I in maybe an artist second or maybe the most thoughtful person on the planet first songwriter second and then and artists third. How would you classify pacify yourself. Are you more of a songwriter now. 'cause you are doing your own music too and it's incredible. It's beautiful but are you. Would you clutter sophomores a songwriter now or an artist or where would you put yourself first of all very con- thank you so much. I'm like I think I I always used to say that. I was only singing so that that I can sing the songs I was writing and then I kinda saw more in love with being like actually singing and now I'm for me. The the active songwriting is so therapeutic from for myself and for I think for the people I'm working with like for me a good songwriting session as one when we actually learned something about ourselves about each other and move forward and so I'm I'm I'm slightly detached from my own artist thing only in the sense that it's like whenever I feel like there's something I need to say that no one else can say kind of poke music out but most of the time it's the actual experience of the conversation member station that leads to the song. That's really my what jobs so right now. I'm mostly just focusing on working with other artists to inspire me and who are who have the same desire to kind of like really dig for for meaning in Okay Okay so let me let me ask you this the song. don't let me down. That's crazy. That's amazing. It's so fun because it's it's it's kind of a it takes you to a place that takes you on a story but then it has this unbelievable unbelievable based drop and you're like what just happened. That's super dynamic. I love that song. What does that song mean. What was that song about and what we're not asking you to share personal conversations but I mean what was what's that song about and what kind of conversations led into crafting a song like that for the chain smoker. I will not personnel at all. I'll tell you because it's such a ridiculous stories basically Scott Harris who is one of the me Scott Harrison drew from the chain smokers with that song together and basically Scott and I had been with a big group of our friends a few weeks before that session. We've been act. and I don't know if you've been there no back hotel but it's it's actually like a very scary place for me. Just because there's no service it's super dusty and it's like the there's this point at night where you kind of it's really hard not to lose everyone. You're with and I got lost so many times when you don't have any cell service and you can't find anyone and actually frightening just because people are like zombies and I don't know I it freaked me out so anyway. Scott lost two and we were talking about this and we're actually walking to drew's house for the session and we were like what if we wrote the song that if you were act hotel freaking out because he couldn't find anyone and you heard the song and it would calm you down and we went into the session with that idea we wrote. Don't let me down in the craziest thing about that is literally the next year hotel. We're standing side states at the chain smoker set listening to download play because full circle yeah. That's awesome. Do you ever have writer's block. Look at sheet of paper and go I look at your console or sit down with a guitar or the piano go. No I got nothing I got. No no got nothing ever run into that yeah. Absolutely I mean I have phases. I'm just like one week back into a great phases writing Bussey. We I mean if we were having this conversation a couple of weeks ago two totally different situation just because I get I'm I get really fatigued when I'm writing songs that are just like songs and not challenging me that makes any sense like I think a lot of the music that I love is music. That kind of like makes me think about something in a new way that I never thought about or just said something in a way that that I would have never come up with myself and and so I think I don't want to contribute at all to a different kind of music like songs just for the sake of songs coming out or songs that are just catchy that don't have much meaning which by the way is like a whole amazing thing that some people are really good at do really well with but for me. I think I if I have too many sessions in a row where I don't feel like push or challenge even by myself then I get really kind of I think about pivoting careers until paintings but I've just had I've actually just come back from a week at a writing camp with this artist one and Sella whose incredible aw and it just totally reinvigorated me. She's like such a deep thinker and we kind of had all these epiphanies through songwriting right now. I'm completely in love with it again but it literally roller coaster in her London Stella Stella Lennon Lennon like John John Lennon on if you get stuck with writer's block again emily I have five kids. I'm thirty eight years old. Okay I live on the picture. I live on fifteen fifteen acres behind a wall with trees and we my wife and I will scarlet when we're eighteen. We started our first company which became America's largest wedding entertainment company funny and I sold on its twenty seven so I've kind of been out of the business game for a long time and I do this because it's energy gay people like us a lot of a lot of fun but if you ever want to write a song he really stuck and you're gonNA. I need some inspiration. I need a song about waking up at three in the morning and stepping on kids toys and questioning the meaning of life. The white hurt so bad. So if do you WanNa put some something like that. That's just that's just throwing it out there. You can have the rights for it. I don't WanNA credits. It's yours. Thank you okay just get to really dark place. You're just stuck with a woodblock and you're going. I wanted to really simple song. Okay now your what was your first song to hit the billboard top forty already or or to hit a maybe your first cut on an artist that people know maybe not. I you know I don't think people realize what a on an album is like and what a hit record looks. It's like can you maybe explain maybe the first big right you did or the first big hit you had and just kind of walk us through that experience yeah for sure. I mean it wasn't even it. It didn't end up being like a huge. Don't let me down. I like big game changing song for me but the first time I was like Oh actually doing this in a real way is I got two songs on Jessie. J's album and one of them masterpiece was the single and it did a thing in the UK and Canada but within the US but it was more just like that that was an artist that I so look up looked up to and firefighters and then to have songs on her album. Let's just like so surreal surreal. Where did you write with her. We were you. Did you travel overseas. Did you write in Wyoming. Did you ride in a van down by the river. Where did you guys have that writing session. I actually you see wasn't in the sessions those pitch. I wrote masterpiece with this amazing writer. Brett Burton the first day she and I met in La La and then I mean yeah I guess to explain to for for people realizing that don't know like a Lotta Times. I mean most times most artists except for you. You take outside songs so writers get together every single day pretty much of the week or the week days and write songs it was and does the best of those songs get sent out to people's managers. There publishers are directly to them and then if they connect with it they will cut cut it. Maybe change a few lyrics to make it more personal but most of most of Pop music is done that way and then there's obviously a handful of artists that are either always involved and what they're giving are completely ready. Get out now. I have to tell you how I discovered you. The the the the writer behind the music here is one of my clients appliances is Colton Dixon who is signed on Atlantic records and his is a David Silverstein and so Micah. I'm hearing all the time about hey you got to listen to the end the right wrist so I listened to every single show all and I got to yours and I went to college with with Ryan. Tetter so Ryan header actually played at my wedding and lived right across the hall from mean. We're good buddies and so I heard Ryan Cheddars and I heard yours and I'm like doc. I gotta get these people on the show my kids and I were addicted to song. Land and I just think what Ross has been doing to shine a light on songwriters. It has been 'cause I know these things because of my relationship with Ryan back in the day. It's fun to see the songs he released. No one really knows who writes the songs. Could you share about what role you feel like. Ross goal and has played in helping artists to maybe get. I don't know it's respect or the the credit I feel like at least from a grammy perspective. You're now getting credit for these things. Could you explain what of an input could impact. Ross has made on your songwriting community. Ross is absolutely taking the game. I mean be beyond what you said. which is the writer is podcast which is such a good resource not for everyone who's interested in this but like first barring songwriters people here so many different stories and see it's done so many different ways is incredible and I think something something else that I've spoken about and that he's confidence thinking about is is this kind of unfair treatment of songwriters how they're kind of at the bottom of the totem pole in terms of like how we get paid and how we get treated when deals are being made and I think airing that on the podcast and his action is really good for young songwriters who are thinking? I'm going to give up because I can't make any money doing this. It's like we've lost an almost lost. It's amazing writers because they can't survive because you can't even pay was working at pottery barn forever. He worked at Pottery Barn and like Nashville Wall Right. I remember he landed cut on Bubba sparks. His album called she tried that was the first big big hit forum and we're going. All the guys in college are going so. Where are you working at Pottery Barn. It's like you couldn't figure out. Could you explain how artists get paid because there's no two or maybe I'm wrong but there's no song without the the the there's there's there's no song songwriter. There's no tour without a songwriter. There's no merge with US songwriter. There's nothing there's no Alba without a songwriter so the song writers these are kind of like the the rebar in the concrete and the foundation of everyone's success but how how do you get paid if stream song right now on spotify if I'm going up the right now and I'm streaming. You're you're new and you're newest album on spotify. How do you get paid pretty not so basically streaming. Is Mass decide okay. let me see the clearest way to explain this. Basically there's publishing side and there's master side got it. Writers have a piece of writers and producers have a piece of the publishing which is money from radio money from sink film TV like any time. The song is played in a public place. and then masters side is song sales and streaming and stuff like that so. I mean I would get for a stream like a fraction of a fraction of sense which so so I I pay a company called custom channels dot net. I've I have a company. I started called elephant in the room. It's a it's a chain of men's ends grooming lounges and I know you travel to Oklahoma a lot for tourism but next time you come here for tourism to the SOD farms I'll give you a tour and we have four thousand members air and we play music overhead and I personally curate the playlist I choose every song so I've got four or five songs that you have written that are that are playing and I pay about a thousand dollars hours a month to play stuff that you have written and other people have written. Do you get paid more for that. I mean like side effects there. He the chain smokers side effects. We added that to the playlist here. I want to say about ten months ago twelve months ago. How do you get paid on that. Is it more if if it's through something like that or is it. Do you know I mean so if you're probably paying a fee to a PR like as capital B. M. Or something like that styles month and so then they yeah so that's that's how they even have like tracking and that's how they kinda split up the money that they make the people depending on which songs are playing host post stuff like that but the problem is a song writer can't really make any significant money unless they have a hit it on radio so like which is beyond messed up and here's here's like how that started which is back in the day when like let's say like Phil Spector's producing some Whitney Houston's album. I'm making this up. I don't even know I don't think he did he would get he would get paid a fee just a fee and knock it any of the back and not get any publishing you just get paid a fee a flat fee to like bring in musicians arrange change the songs. I do that kind of stuff and the songwriters all publishing but then as the role of the producer became more kind of integral and they were writing slash they were the ones coming up with the cores anonymous oceans now like when everyday go into a session as a producer there so then they I started to be like right. We need some of the publishing so we can make money on this depending on how well the song does so. They started cutting in to the publishing publishing that used to be just for the writers. the issue with that which. I don't believe that producers don't deserve publishing. I think they do but the issue shoe at that is the songwriters just gave up a piece of the pie which is often an equal pay to what they're getting now and didn't get any compensation so we don't don't get any fee in return like we didn't. We didn't make a trade. It was just like okay now. You're getting what we normally get and the biggest problem to two problems with that one is when the deal is being done like let's say Riana is taking some written three honest manager uh and labelling all these people are only communicating with the producer because that's the person they're buying the song from so things happen like go in and cut the song with her and they'll change all all these parts and technically even have to know about it because no one's thinking to Luton in 'cause. I'm not the person doing the deal song that I've written so so. That's the first problem. The second problem which is the real issue is if this this producers getting like ten grand for a song on his album. Let's say and let's say the album does okay but like it's track nine and it's never made into who is single and it just gets like how many streams that's doesn't take off at all the the producer will have gotten ten grand and the writer who barely had a say hey and whether or not that became a non album get pretty much nothing and gives away a song. They've written. So how did you get. How did you dollars? When when did you get to a place where you realize that you wouldn't be homeless or have you gotten to that place yet because you've been a major rights but the way you guys get paid as jacked up I mean when did you get to a place where you could finally have a little bit of financial peace and you're like okay because you don't do this for the money. I know it's Cathartic. I know it's poetry. I know it's something you give to the planet's gift of people I know that just by hearing enough interviews reviews with you. But when did you get to a place where you thought I am not going to be homeless this week. Yeah Yeah I mean it. was I mean I didn't make any money until a year a year and a half. Don't let me down was hit. That's another thing it takes forever for the money to come but I was lucky in the sense that I started doing it kind of when I was in college so I didn't have that much time between graduating and when I started making I mean I had signed a publishing deal that kind of helped me over but my friend I mean I tell this story all the time but my friend Caroline who I wrote new rules with we had written new rules and three months later we'd written new new rules and anr had come in and said there was no course that we literally just like forgot about the song and three months later. Caroline nine walked into session in London and told the producers who are friends of hers. I'm I'm quitting songwriting. I've been doing this for eight years. I'm not making any money. I don't WANNA ask. That's my parents borrow any more money. I have to know when to be realistic and call it and she cancelled her next two months of session and taking a job as a waitress and they were like you can't do that. You're too good like the world needs you don't give up and like everything will be different if you just wait give it one more year and they wrote a song called and this is another crazy full circle moment but they wrote a song that day called in a year from now and and literally the day to day the new rules went number one on radio she had her phone topped up memory how does and it popped the lyric sheet from in a year from now they had written it one year to the day to totally absurd. I told her the other day I was like. You need to start writing more songs about the things that you wanna have happened because that seems to work for you. Third Point is caroline whose fiercely seriously like probably one of the best song on the planet certainly one of the Best I've ever worked with one's about to stop writing songs when she had already written in new rules which is just like. It's shouldn't be that way like she. There should have been in eight years of her. Getting on people with album enough money to to survive and so Ross is actually doing a lot for that. I mean just in terms of. Are you going to get paid. When artists perform is that GONNA happen. Do you see that happening where when artist goes out and fills out in arena and merged and they're so do you ever see a deal a time and place where you as a writer could get like a three three sixty piece of the merch everything that's sold at that concert. I mean that would be amazing. I've had like that. I've had lyrics folks that I've written turned into like logos. That again is like track thirteen on the bonus version of an album that I think no money from so that's amazing yeah but the one thing that we are talking about and I'm really happy. We're having this conversation because I was talking about this like three days ago and I need to be inspired to get it done today. Yeah we're talking about starting a song on as union where if we all agree that we won't we will not accept people taking our songs unless there's a fee just like there's producers then there will be no like people have to pay fees because otherwise there's no songs for them to tell me this incorrect wrecked by saying the songwriting community is much smaller than people think but it has a bigger impact than you think. I mean is under basically about five hundred people in that niche. Three hundred people that are that you you guys are consistently writing what is considered top forty but there's not like thousands of you right. Isn't there about three to four hundred of you right yeah yeah. If even I mean it's a pretty small squad for sure I was listening. Everyone knows about everyone. I was listening to one of the and the writer is and it was the second one that Ross had record court of the second episode and he was doing the interview and he mentioned Ahmad Royal and then Bussey and a couple of guys is that Colton Dixon was riding with and I'm like I don't work with a lot of pop artists at all one and I keep hearing the same names and I'm like this is crazy yeah so small ooh. It is like a heist our small high school back like I mean that's when I first when actually wouldn't reaffirmed hit me up about fluke. I ended up going down the rabbit hole coppee and just saying like you'd Click one person's name and then see that they're on all these songs they'd written with and Click that name and then it was like all other times mall squad pressure well I have. I have three final questions for you and then I'll let you get back to being Miss Miss Wyoming here. One is your you decided to become an artist or release you. You've been an artist the whole time you know but you've decided to release. Leash your own work. We're not writing for other for some of your some of your music. How do you decide what Song to release for another artist and song to keep the song ritual that you put out there recently or I don't know I just I get get this one. A side effects is just a beautiful song. I don't see you in the video. I want to see I don't see you. I want to see and then you have something like ritual. That's that's it's your song. How do you decide which ones you keep. and which ones you give away because it got babies. Oh Yeah I mean I'm pretty pretty ah most of the time when I'm going into session. I'm detached in the sense that it's something I care about but just because I don't want things to be complicated when I really WanNa wreck right from myself. I kind of go in this physically for that. there was a couple of songs on my album two songs a song called just click and one called not ready to dance that have been written for pitch like six years prior to that. I just always didn't just always kept being like I. I don't want this person that cut it on person. Cut It that me realize okay. I I obviously want to sing the but in the case of the ritual song and side Effects and actually capsized song like I did a while ago with a band called friendship I had just kind of gone into to the writing session and done a demo vocal and then they ritual won't change smokers and friendship all had decided to keep me on it which I'm not always down for. It has to kind of be the right song and kind of go with my vision of myself but yeah. That's always really fun 'cause then. I don't have to be the one that's like seeing then so those are all great really really fun obviously like gives me a chance to come out and like sing one song with people at their shows or whatever it is. That's always just a good time. Now I saw an interview you did with Valerie morehouse house to be on the show. She'll be on the show here soon and on your your voice is off. I don't know if you're aware you're Kinda. Sneaky key awesome make your voice is i. I'm not rippin. I'm not ripping no. I'm not saying that I'm just saying like your voice is kind of like Mike posner sneaky awesome. I don't think people realize is how great Mike earners voices. How great your voices. It's really sneaky good Do you work with somebody like Valerie or do you do you do it on your. I mean talk talk to me about. Maybe what someone like Valerie does and do you have a vocal coach or yes. Valerie is my uncle coach. She is so ridiculously amazing. I my dad never let me take voice lessons. When I was younger because I would actually I'm glad he didn't because he wanted me to figure out my own voice before had someone teaching me and then I had I had done a few voice lessons with like random t I mean valley and I talk about this all the time but I done lessons with these teachers who voices to the stars and all these things and was always leaving being like that didn't feel helpful or like. I don't even know why like I can sing find out on my wife taking lessons but Valerie is judy reports teacher from the chain smokers and so she came I went on I went on tour with them a couple years ago and she I remember just hearing her talk to him and talking to other people the the actual anatomy of the larynx and your throat and what's happening when you're singing and why you shouldn't do certain things because it makes it harder to saying thing and you can't have certain oats. I remember watching her and thinking okay that I'm interested in because the way the only way I personally can learn anything is when it's when I fully understand the whole picture and it's explained got and voice lessons with Valerie are so meeting she doesn't it's not just like running through scale like a lot of teachers do and then not explaining what you're doing right or wrong. It's very scientific and very comprehensive and I've literally cried and voices heard because I'm hitting notes. I've never had before. She's the most incredible teacher. I've felt very lucky to work with our. I'M GONNA I'm GonNA sneak in just a couple of questions and I'll let you hang up on me. Okay Yeah I heard it. You've written over nine hundred songs nine hundred songs nearing two thousand now. Okay okay so I'm old old school. I'm getting old information here. I just wanted to ask you the songs that you don't release them. I'm just kidding but seriously what do you do with these songs. I'll get here why why are we being stabbing deprived. I mean we've put out almost two thousand of my podcasts and we we we to shove a few of them for various reasons or whatever ever but at the end of the two thousand songs. Why can't we hear him. What do you do with well first of all. They're definitely not all good. That would be bogus. I'd like to say no. I mean especially at the beginning. Scott Scott here talking about before before I read. Don't let me down with WHO's like we fully came up together and he's the best but we used to. We used to write these songs that were so ridiculous and so bad and then be so much data that no one was cutting them and I listen now and I'm like well or are we talking about but there's a lot of them are practice that kind of gets you to the good one of them it a huge disappointment that they don't come out genuinely and I like whenever I'm out of writing camper. I'm GONNA session session. I always ask threatening. I'm working with the play music because I feel the same way as you. I'm always like these songs shouldn't just be sitting on the hard drives and need to hear but I we're all scared of releasing stuff or putting stuff out because there's a chance that it might get cut by someone at some point but yeah. I don't know it's definitely a devastating mass. Definitely why put those two songs when Ireland too because I thought if no one wants to cut these especially I think they're so special that I'd rather them. Just be out in the world then like hope that one day it's going to cut it. We'll the way you're shooting your view of your videos. are beautiful. They're really well done and I think that I would like to encourage listeners to check out. I love the listeners just to say listen here. Just plan your weekend. All you you gotTa do is just take block out three hours. Just listen to all of imagery warrants stuff but maybe we can ask him to listen to one particular song. Is there a particular song that you've recently released that you might say hey. This is something because we all know new rules. If you've had a car you know in the last five years three years you've heard that song do elite but you've heard that we all know about the chain smokers we all know about. Sean does know about these big hits but is there something you've personally written for yourself that you've written and recorded and put out there that you would like for us to check out with my own voice you mean. Oh Yeah great question. I think trying to decide between two but I I to not okay. I gotTa do not ready to dance the one I mentioned before. It's like one of my I learned a lot in writing that song just in terms of like how important talk to me the storytelling is I think we just had so much fun putting that song together and making every single line support support the idea and lead to the chorus basically so that that's I'm proud of that. One point point the other songs on my album that I feel like I wrote that actually with my boyfriend who did it and we just kind of it was one of those epiphany moments where we were just mining from what we were writing. The song was just kind of coming through us so that's another favorite of mine so it'd be the two will miss Wisconsin or Miss Wyoming. Oh Man could be missed Wisconsin Miss New York now ms that you do. You kind of sound like you are from. I grew up in Minnesota and you have kind of that Minnesota Wisconsin. It's invited you to spend some time up there or something no really fit right in there with Finn and Bjorn and Shit Plus Ski. All my buddies is growing. Raw should get over there. Yeah we'll take you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule. I cannot thank you. Thank you really appreciate it thrive nation. If you have yet to Checkout Emily Warren's music check out the two songs she recommended not ready to dance by Emily Warren and the point by Emily Warren on Youtube or spotify. Wherever you can hear great music itunes check her out this lady is is a powerhouse when it comes to writing pop music as a kids and just great songs and we liked each and every show where the boom and so now without further ado here we go free to what Pope Doc?

writer producer Emily Warren Ross Scott Scott New York spotify New York City US Jason Mraz Colton Dixon Kids Co Shawn Mendez Shaw Valerie Nyu Josh
LTYH w/ Tyler C, Dylan, Hannah G + Interview w/ OBX Stars Rudy Pankow & Jonathan Daviss

Chicks in the Office

1:52:28 hr | 7 months ago

LTYH w/ Tyler C, Dylan, Hannah G + Interview w/ OBX Stars Rudy Pankow & Jonathan Daviss

"What's up everyone? It's chicks of the office with Rian. Fran giving you that Friday energy on Thursday. This is a huge episode so we are not going to have that much of an intro. We got half Outer Banks Half Bachelor. It's everything chicks in the office. Listeners could ever dream of an lives a little sprinkle baby baby news yes in a little analogy regal and of course this podcast is brought to you by. Macy's our favorite place to shop right now. We're getting all of our alpha. One quarantine is over. We got all of our lounge wear from macy's and of course they're brute beauty products as well and mother's Day is coming up soon Shopping macy's to get a gift for your mom exactly Rian. I have both bought things for our moms from macy's I know that they are going to love it. And unique products skin care. I mentioned last week that I bought a four zero. The little you know face cleanser machine thing that people's you see nine scream everywhere I've used it for a few days now and so far so good. I'm not going to give my full review but so far I love it. I feel like my skin. Looks Great So they have all these amazing things that you can truly just get all together on macy's you can get your clothes your new for your new makeup stuff everything by severe mom and you can check out. All of our looks at macys dot com slash six in the office. There is France. So let's get into the show we have gee-gee hadeed pregnancy news with Zane. We'll talk about that. We also have Tyler Cameron finally joining the show. As well as energy and Dylan entrant we do. Listen to your heart. Recap kind of. It's it's a mixture of recap with just some fun. You guys will enjoy it. And we have our interview with a Rooney and Jonathan Davis From Outer Banks Aka J J. M. Pope. They are wonderful. So let's get into it. Starting off with G G had beaten scene. I was passed and by far the craziest news that we have received. This year is that GD Adid is pregnant with Zan's child. This is outrageous. I am so happy for them. Congrats THEM WHAT. Who would us all this coming? It is absolutely insane. I think this was the most like you said. Most unexpected thing ever Judy Zane have obviously they have the history. It's been they've been together for a long time on and off recently mostly off and then we saw them again. Like January ash Now it's almost may add Bam. They are having a baby. Tmz confirmed it now. I think some people were skeptical. Like is this true as it's not true. I feel like it's definitely true. And now we have all these clues that seem like Gee gees twenty. Fifth Birthday Party was also a gender reveal party. Yes I mean. They had the balloons. One balloon had pink. String one balloon had a blue string also detectives on the Internet figured out that gee-gee had a bag that said hey little one on it and Bella Hadid had covered it with an Emoji on her story but like I said detectives on the Internet figured out a bag is actually a baby gift bag and TMZ has also reported that they are having a baby girl have learned so this honestly it almost brings a tiered. My I feel so happy for them like you said they weren't really seeing I think it was more like December. They were seen together Again it was roundly. Yulon was burnt. They insane they have a shower bad thing and we saw them around that time us and they she's like five months. Pregnant now are almost five months pregnant. They say she's twenty weeks along so she's been pregnant for awhile and of course she's a supermodel so it's Kinda hard to tell when supermodels are pregnant. I mean they have this amazing physique that yeah they don't get pregnant pregnant light regular people and also they know all the tricks like the right close to where they can probably hide it But like you said I want to be. I want to be really happy for them. It's crazy because Zane is one of the most mysterious celebrities. There is honestly. I truly believe that. Zane is an absolute mystery There are all these rumors about him. You see all these rumors about him. And it's it's just. I feel like because he is an introvert and he lives. It's very hidden lifestyle that people have all. These may be assumptions about him. But then again there are also just terrible things and you see these blind items or crazy days and nights anti lawyer saying you know that he is in bad shape. But I don't know it's so hard because you see baby news. They seem so happy therefore I am happy for them and going to try in knock out the negative energies energy and rumors. And just Kinda like forget those exists. I agree with you. I feel like you can't harvest on these rumors because they're rumors we don't yell anything about saying we don't know him personally at all. It makes sense now looking back when GDP class back at Jake Paul when he was roasting saying on twitter and I was like he went back to his room like respectful king so he was being respectful king because she was pregnant with his child which you love to see and I hope that Zane is in a good place. I hope that. Gd's a good place. And I mean what a time to be pregnant. I mean you gotta stay at home anyway. It's great that she's getting a break from modeling at this time so she can focus being. I saw a tweet. That was one this I mean. The baby is going to be gorgeous. Obviously and to this baby being born into this family. Where like gee-gee is her her mother Zane Father? And then you have like aunt do Alita and like sage. Just it's so crazy that the you know the world that that is their their life but I mean so excited. Ambala the whole thing like uncle the weekend. I don't know the weekend. It's just is really crazy and a high of God. I hope that and like you said I feel like they are just going to stay on the farm in Pennsylvania ride it out and maybe announce something when the actually born. Yeah I feel like that. Might be the case where maybe get a little a little announcement of some sort usually I think. Gdp would like come out be like these rumors aren't true if they weren't true so go ahead and believe that it's real and just say congrats to them. We have our listen to your heart. Recap that's kind of a recap not really a recap with Tyler Dylan Hannah Trent. It is fantastic and of course the whole time guys. You know what we're doing drinking coors light because that is the official beer of chicks in the office We got to hang out with our friends and that is the best way to chill out and drink a coors light. Even though we can't see them in person right now we are speaking them via video chat. And if you are doing that with your friends as well the best way to do it is to sit back. Relax and crack. Open a coors light the mounds on the bottles and cans even turn blue and your beer is called that way. You always know when it's time to chill when you need to hit reset just open chords light. It's mountain called refreshment made to chill like I said I was drinking accords light. While we're doing this recap. It's our our absolute favorite beer and I'll tell you why it's because coors light is brewed with a three step cold process code logger cold filtered and cold package so it's actually made to chill. The mountains encores lights cold activated bottles and cans turn blue when chilled perfection born in the rocky mountains of Colorado. A nine hundred seventy eight cores. Light is refreshing Chris and only one hundred and two calories and like I said coors light the beer when you just WanNa kick back relax. Maybe you're listening to the PODCAST. Maybe you're watching episode of listen to your heart or whatever show your binging right now the best way to do it to get your maximum chill is to do it with the coors light. That's cores light. Is the one we choose when we need a moment of chill so when you want to reset reach for the beer that's made to chill and right now you guys can have course? I delivered by going to get DOT CO DOT COM and finding local delivery options near you once again. That's DOT Kors light dot com to find those local delivery options near you. That's coming from decoys brewing company Golden Colorado and always remember to celebrate responsibly. Cheers refreshing podcasts. All right everyone time could welcome to the show. Hannah trend is yeah. I'M NOT GONNA be able to properly introduce this. I know that no no no. We're GONNA use that one. Because we WANNA see show people have noxious you are and that in a suite of you. Tyler. You are finally here on the show in his April. You set October months early baby. That was coming. I'm just GonNa let you roll with that joke. We'll let you have that one dylan and Hannah very excited to have you here on this show before. Hannah's first time welcome we are going to recap listen to your heart. Trent is with us as well when we asked trying to do this. He was like you guys. Sure that's not going to be too much. I thought he was trying to get out of it but here no. I wasn't trying to get out of it. I just know how these things worth. We have six people on this. It's going to be a lot of people hopefully not talking over each other. But I'm very interested to see how this goes right. Your Voice Matters. Yes everybody needs to be heard at the San especially especially when we're talking about the show. Which does your back get sore back. Ever get sore from what carrying the show. I don't care show come on. Someone saw that one coming. Rian for you. Oh Yeah I'm sure honestly. Let's talk about it whenever we do put out a podcast with Trent. I see all these girls tweeting at Trenton. Owing trend you were still on the podcast and yet I refresh on a Mike. Okay waiting for me and Fran you know waiting for some shoutouts. It's just I see a re tweeting. People were like great episode today and they only tag tram like what the fuck was. The only reason that is and I think we've talked about it before is because they just can't believe that I talk about the shows guy. I do not have the face for a person who talks about these shows. So it's just different. You guys talking about the reality. Tv that's sort of you know kind of what you guys do me. I can't believe that I'm talking about and that's the only reason you're a pleasant surprise. But yeah he was on credit in that. I'm not going to because I really think. That's the reason God all right. Well let's get started on the recap Fran. Why don't you take us from the beginning? Because I don't. I don't really remember much about this episode. That's because number one number one there was like no actual. I feel like live. Tweeting are live. Tweeting was just hit one so much shade at Ryan. It was just boo. I am absolutely destroyed. Tyler you tweeted that you you said when reassess read it's over for that person and I feel like Fran can also attest that lighter if you piss me off. There's something about it but I just I can't I can't let go of it. It's like Ryan told me to settle down. Let's explain what happened to the people who are listening. I didn't see the tweet me ask me room. Yeah we were attacked last week. Were tweeting more Ryan. There wasn't enough Ryan all support of Ryan because we love Ryan all of a sudden this girl Tags Ryan on instagram with our tweets and he writes. We all need love. Y'All settled down settled down Ryan. We're showing you love and support you want me to settle down so then what I did. I proceeded to settle down settle. Yeah She Ryan. Officially cancelled in terms of destroyed started doing a little bit. But like this thing was at the end would Ryan ripped it like performance with a Tasha and as I don't WanNa say say your a great nephew investor that yeah I did I. I knew that was too much but whatever nothing you could have said was meaner than what Jason Mraz did Ryan So. I think the best doesn't show. That was the best part of the whole episode. Why don't we start by gone high like we all texted her so happy like how I am right now. Like I can't stop smiling thinking back on Jason Mraz like I had dreams about it last night. The first suggests Person same test what we were saying hundred great point. I was watching him. I was like do people stop Jason Mraz on the side of the street and take pictures with them and stuff like I didn't what he looks like never seen before. I think I have seen him before but I think I would walk past him. And then turn around and be like Oh. I think that might have been Jason Mraz and then continued by day. Your good name of people. That's so you'd be very good at that. I would be if I walk past on the street. That guy looks like that crude drawing on the Jason Mraz Album. I say looks like Jack Johnson Silicon Valley or the studio. Yes that's right because I love that. Show one no. I don't but I thought that was The show Fran told me I wasn't far enough to watch. That was a that. Was the big short we. That's like when Christian Bale. When I found out he had an accent. That's kind of like what it was finding out. What Jason Mraz looks like? He has an accent. That Christine Battle has an accent is British need. Yeah Yeah what. It's it thinks Australia L. shows anywhere single. Okay we'll back right. Yeah all right British okay. All right we're starting to recap. We're starting from the beginning guys. I've tried to do this. We're starting from the beginning. And he's a legend like three chicks fact to back to back and then this episode gets canceled. Okay well sorry he got destroyed okay. We'll talk about it later on the episode started. Chris Harrison told them all that this was the final group. They had to pair up like nobody else. Nobody knew was gonNA come in and Savannah and Brandon decided that they were GonNa stay together and Julius Kinda got screwed and Julia like I tried to. Joy tried to shit on Savannah. I mean should on Brandon to Savannah. it all kind of went to ship because Brandon stayed with Savannah. What did you guys think about Julia? Kind of losing losing her cool Julian from the top of my charts last week to the bottom still had a driver but at the say. Hannah I don't. I'm worried well. I said Julia Julia. Wears Lilly Pulitzer and he's just I just nothing against live? Took she does and I just feel like. I don't know I was with her after you high school too. That's why I was scared. She handled the whole thing very like she she was meeting. She was very mean to to Savannah. I thought she sort of losing the the last episode and then the way. She handled everything today or last night. Supper sewed it just downhill big time. I mean but then she turned some scary too far. This never mind quite well. It hasn't shared guys. Sheridan's elite respectful. King yes I agree no I I don't like Julie I like last week. I don't like her as much this week. She seems I don't know sh the way she goes about doing things and obviously I don't want to jump ahead but like when they're talking about I don't have feelings for Brandon. She's just a Liar. She's a big time like yeah. What did you guys think about Gabe? Shuna shot with Savannah and getting absolutely destroyed absolute showdown Portland. You show tile. I thought Victoria bar to hear Dave Dave Bush shooting. Sean P whatever happened yes. She blew her. I think they were tweeting. Something she was like sorry. I heard on yes. She's getting your hair done David. Like don't don't make me look fool and then like clapback there but I don't know I really should be okay. I'm definitely no. I said. Gabe poor poor game like said that the only way he would stay was if he was paired up with Savannah and Savannah. Shut him down. I feel like I came out of left field. That was the ultimate hail. Mary like whatever. Toss it up move so I didn't feel that bad 'cause I don't think he really cared that much. Yeah and then Ruby. Wake because there's really ruby got sued Sosa because gave kept right. Yeah yea gave captured within one game left like Ruby. Had to go home to this bridge back. Why didn't marry Marianna? I'm with you on Alan Tyler. She was beautiful. She killed that blue dress on the rose ceremony. Big Ma remember the collar for draft. Your Shot Tyler. But but somebody choosing the Bachelor or Paradise. They need to keep keep around. I don't know I don't think she got had like nearly enough time. Do these words do they go to Paradise. I don't think it's that's either confirmed nor denied but I bet you. If somebody was liked enough they could definitely go to. Paradise would be my guess. If there's a yeah that I think I guess yeah. My thought was a soon as you're on a bachelor show like you're eligible. I don't know if anyone on this show has made an impact to the point. Where like we gotTa have this person on Paradise but I think theoretically they could help out. I hope for Tyler. Is I tyler steak that none of these guys go to paradise still his ass Jusuf. Aren't you going tyler? I can't give has dealing on the podcast just to just hundred campaign banned from Paradise Heart. I'm I'm full tyler Now if Tyler Paradise You'd absolutely just get ruined. They would make you look show mad. Oh my God I'm Gonna I'm GONNA be honest. I feel like it would just be like all downhill because a great rise that they'd be like all right. We need to have them fall. What else are we more harshly? More and more good for everybody. I'm a one woman. Kinda Guy Tyler. Yes show in doesn't look at you. You know it was there in all you wanted and Look Cute. They are and they're matching tie. You'll see they make me sick still got it still got it hasn't been. Has it been a year yet now? Almost it's almost been a year since we met each other. Yeah Dylan Zack. Dylan calls me after senior dude. I just met Hannah and I am all by going to paradise. I'm going to like like Dylan. Have this plan for like months and I had no clue that he liked me at all being Bolivia. No no no no. He was very closed off. Like I I remember like I went home nine or whatever and I was like. Yeah I think it's more of a friend thing I guess like Hughes. Your verify zone do sounds. I've friends owner blad down a little hard to get from the beginning. Glad to play hard t shirt and keep it. I tried to give her searcher house like they've dropping off white. I need a deal we can. We Really Nice. It was off. Why am I still have it if you wanted? By the way we talk about the the rolling loud log for a second. Because now that we're all together we can. We can address the fact that everyone thought I'd Dylan was an absolute psycho ever lane. Come back for this one. Yeah yeah no come back on. I just filmed it. And then uploaded the footage together. The music was actually it is. They're playing out loud the whole time on the more he deserves were Spielberg after that. I appreciate Tyler support. I'm here for you know. Maybe what feels separately differently if it was if it was and I didn't alter anything taller would be tolerant field different if it was the girl he's running with on. Tmz THE OTHER DAY LA. Oh this is going to go that way. Okay and so actually is into your heart is is definitely a great recap people are people are like? Wow they did such a great job talking about that. Well this was like when we did the finale. The Bachelor in Paradise Finale Dylan. And then tyler came and then we did not talk about Bachelor in Paradise Finale. So they're getting a recap mixed in with some actual fun because let's be real this show. It's tough not the best I though last night was the best episode. Though for being honest the first two were strong. I thought yeah I thought last night once you start mixing in the musical component like in a real way. I think that's way more fun than I agree. I really like singing singing. I really enjoyed because some of them are actually really good so it is different but it is definitely it is definitely less drama and also we never really were told like what these people would win if they won the show and then Chris Harrison was like you guys like when you win you get to on tour like there wasn't I think that's the only prize. We not really like a bridge. Is this the prize? That is that you go right now. That's the fries. Nobody shows up out there too like empty coffee shops. I know I'll be any fresh air today. I have actually. It's a beautiful day today guys but is there anything can sure you're right so I don't know not fully there after meeting cash on the same level last night? I'll be real. I ate an edible and it started hitting around the same time catches started hitting. I think Trent sent a picture that was cashew. Like he was like this. Is You right now? One hundred percent. Why were cash and Jason Mraz there with? We're not there yet because he gets. That's what I'm saying. Okay anyways let's let's we'll go and order here. We'll go backtrack okay. We're backtracking so Chris Harris End. The couples are finalized. He says Woo Hoo if you win. You're going on tour. Yeh and Julia she stuck with Sheridan even though even though she's really does not want to be with him. let's talk about Brandon saying to Savannah's face like us like you. You can either do this or you can go home and cry. It was very grown. Yeah and then. She started laughing right which do laughed. I was like that was funny. I was like I'm going to stay here and cry our like you. WanNa do this or you. WanNa go home and cry like okay. I'm starting to realize there was some parts of the show that I missed out just from thinking about what I was. GonNa tweet about Ryan. I don't remember this might try to see a song. France we I was. I was deeply this. It was an interesting move on his part. I think he's playing the bad boy game but he just come. He did not come out of that looking while at all Danny and BECCA got a date. Now Trent do finally know who those people are. Ado No yeah they. They had to give them a date. Jeff so we can kind of get to know them a little better. I will say when Danny and Becca. I came on the screen last night. I did not know Becca was I had no idea who that was But yeah it's I mean it didn't last long obviously. They ended up going home at the end but there was kind of weird part all right. Now we're there. We're at the day to day. Spa Spoiler Danny. They sent me home. Dallas Dylan's when we know that much alike we just have the suicide in Somerset it was Ryan Ryan. Seacrest had a baby. That would be so right. Something love to have a baby with Ryan. Seacrest legal shape head. I think really what it is when the same shape head and then hair like does the same thing his. Here's super high. I feel like it's not high. It's like boy. Look you know but I feel like you could get your hair like that if you try. Daniel Yeah Danny stiles it that way. Better doing all the responses. I got your definitely the Ba- people were calling him dollar store Dylan which I thought was pretty funny. That's good hey listen. We're we do not endorse anyone. Version of dill. I like the dollar store not him. There's nothing wrong with the dollar store that's true. That's true tyler. Degree point dollar freeze. Tyler's poured a shot of smirnoff drinking their tie No one rated vodka and here there. That's right I got the job. Of course the chicks office segment are cores. Light Beer our modeling into that screen chat screech out that and send it to sales right back to the recap where we're yes. Danny. And Babka go on their date. They got to try and fancy clothes before they all got to sing. They all got assigned songs and they all practice and whatever and Julia Julia League was started to go crazy. She lost her shit as Brandon and Savanna were practising. She couldn't stand listening to them. They were so. Pda and they were never PDA. Before and Julia Confronted Savannah and called her disingenuous multiple times with off on this one. It was Area FELLAS Julian. Yeah I didn't really understand where Julia was coming from on this. Because she kept saying that she doesn't like Brandon to like Sheridan but yet what she was saying to Savannah was very clear that she did like Brandon and she did not in fact. Sheridan or else she wouldn't be mad that SAVANNAH AND BRANDON GETTING ALONG. And yes they're showing. Pda because they're trying to win a competition in show. They need out of the reason. It clicked in Savannah's brain because she was like Oh wait. The only way I'm GonNa win is if I start acting like I like this person that man happy right at she's faking it or whatnot. But you're on a show and Julia Joy. It doesn't like Sheridan at all. Like if anybody's faking. It's Julia Right. Listen you guys are all right but if I heard I want you to want me one more time I was GONNA jump out of my apartment will the window? It was horror in and bad like it was a weird news so bad. It was one of my favorite songs. I fucking hate this song now. A No no no Brandon Brandon Savannah Song to want me on you tyler on her Brennan's sky. It's basically you know what I love Dill Dylan. Hanner just whispering to each other about. Who's the people over? We have pulled up right here. Because I can't remember a Peterson this song. Yea This is like an iconic movie writings on kind of hunger played the ten things I hate about you version. Yeah have you seen some things about you? God No other Batasuna Song. Yes they really weird version of it. That's why you don't know this song it's like I did. I see right yes. They ruined it though. I'm tyler go watch ten things I hate about you. Great will be one of actually. I was going to say one of but it is probably my favorite Rom Com by far ledger in that movie. A So throws movie. Yeah Yeah one of his best performances raising Arthur Dillon. Are you about to eat chips into this? Microphone like Oh just let. It's going to be to Lao. No Abaco feeling you can you can you tips with Hamas show. This is my job not going to do. I'm not going to do it so let's continue. Well here is about no no also let me let me. Asmar rea- hates rea- hates listening to people. Chew hates a phobia. We need to get you a different snacks a Nazi. That's not true. Love a lot of things. I love a lot of things passionately. I also hate a lot of things passionately. Actually I love the Senate to do that so it looks like you are different planet. Oh Yeah it is I also love passionately. It's the Amazon Lights. The Sky Light. Everyone that's not a free add but also it is a free add because now everyone's GonNa go. So what does it Amazon skylights skylight? So if you go on Amazon. It's called the skylight and then it's like fifty bucks and you just set it up in your room and it just projects lights and you just. I have not gone into my room without turning not light on now like I don't sit in there without it. It's still dull. I walk in my room and I'm like this is another print. It feels amazing. Like I'm I'm entering another universe. This is your phone to use it. Now it's a it's like a plug in plug it into your wall. Just like dad won't be such a to talk when I get it. Oh God you're take talks shirtless and cowboy hats definitely botches tectonics shirts. I only have assured our interview values right. I'm boycotting permanently shirtless. Yeah the last one. Actually be the last one started like a close up on your abs and I was like who was it. Was it tyler who was like close up on my apps or was it the person filming due to fly. Look like Tyler I would never put off. No we're not saying he showed. We're just saying like the close up on the APP. Zoom out ice absolutely John. Tyler's like ours like hot girl who just learned how instagram worked. Just that's how you learn to work to talk to that too. Let's get back to the show that we've that were really crushing Dylan. Wanted us to acknowledge his tech talks. There I think no no no. I don't speaking of Ted Talk Katcha. Yes that's a professional. Broadcaster is fantastic. Hannah are my favorite. Okay drescher issue like things take. She's turned kosher. Song is a song called. Tick Tock tally. You missed that one. You may stick to a good one. Good one I'll say it again. It was a great laughing because it was awkward. I thought it was funny and then I like No. He was actually attack on the clock. Yes Yup great saw. Is there to talk to tyler only? Yeah something's very go. Hannah knows it too. I don't know what they're going to start doing to talk. Power Hour three. Repeat every day for an hour or so hammer talks. Oh my God. We went of God. Tyler. I'm just GonNa say we would take over Tock. We are over to Dr. I love that idea. Love Dance Studio apartment. We work on their own. My God and then we've become just like a full on dance team but just not with other people in fact as the. All Right Gentlemen we. Just listen to me and tyler make plans. Yeah that sounds great guys. Thanks for inviting all of us idea. She got week. You guys do that. Sounds all all four of us? Like okay got back. I love to supervise Agdam. I'm sweating Viking. Choreograph trend is one of my most watched tick talks. I went up to hit once and I was like. Hey Trang can you just do a little quick tap dance and he just went fifty baby and it's one of my most watch on so that's I think that's the only tick Tock I've ever done so you wanna done area go tran. I get you backtrack. I'll get you back in our guys. We want to talk about the singing. 'cause there are some pretty good saying. I'm not gonna live really really good rudy I really liked now. It's tough because I like how they kind of paired like they did the love portion. I like everybody pick somebody based on that. Instead of like pairing up sanger's because rudy is like so so good and then all these boys and girls are just so much better than boys like Natasha's league the boys. The boys aren't Chris's good. Christmas is good. I sit bridges a haven't because it's such a good song as ours high standards for. Yeah Yeah Yeah that I mean. That's a very hard song to sing. And you're never gonNA sound likely bridges so so I don was tough in general but like Brie was okay do you think debris Taza due to the APP. Yeah anyway that's so true. Do you think the guys and the girls are going to start like switching based on. Who's a better singer? 'cause THEY WANNA go on tour. I don't think there's a shared in Julia Crossover with Brandon. -culing Sheridan Gopher Brandon. That would be something so let me electric they just stuck with these people that have now can swapping has. I think you can swap. 'cause there's rose ceremonies right there but the row ceremonies now are just based on the singing. But what if what these ask each of the gesture that we have this rose where someone I want you to have this rose but shared it or Julia. Do you want to have this? Rose shoot say yes in an instant. There are no rules a gloria from the start. There are no rules. Maybe if like if four people agree to swap then they could but I've or two people switch and then people are sent home because they're not in a cubs more. Does that make him? Swingers kind of. I think it's because it's the first season and they don't really explain the rules. We don't really know what's going on but think about like the first season of paradise or the first season of the bachelor like nobody really knew inaccurate careers ago so I feel like if somebody when we say there are no rules even though there are. I feel like that's the case with this show like I think if someone is like. Hey I want to switch. Maybe they gotta ask somebody. I don't know I'm sure that's going to happen. I mean clear. Some of them don't like the people they're partnered up with a one and done which she likes and Julia. They don't like each other or Julia doesn't like Sheridan but the way they perform together because it made Hannah or Savannah feel like Shit. So it's like I don't know if they would swap even that with Oh wait. Why'd you say Hannah Trent? I did out of hand in my head. Because he's on the show this. There's no denying fight. The it's tough because Julia if Julian Brandon do like decide that they want to be a couple. I don't I just don't think that's going to happen anyway. You just had such a look of disgust on your face when you said done I Julia. Why don't really like either of them now and Brandon? I don't really liken although I do I like Savannah so maybe of Savannah and Sheridan paired up it. Would it would be better but Sheridan really likes Julia. It was sad watching them saying because he was so into it and was like staring at her so lovingly and she was full performer indefinitely. It all night I thought you were with coors light. What is that? I am drinking cores like Tyler. Of course I was like this is crazy are eight one. Thought me okay guys. I'm drinking wine. It tastes delicious peanut greasy. Oh that I ordered from carbon. Actually they're delivering in the city. The restaurant with the fire spicy reggae tone. This is what I'm so jealous You can get all the best food right now. Yup Young four Charlesbourg every single day right now. The delivery is great especially the spicy. Tony Bach that they also you can get wine bottles delivered so yes. I am drinking wine wine. Hand treat yourself. It's only three o'clock here. Yeah I feel guilty. What else are you doing going? I have to save the world. He's looking at these chips. I am within one. Show me. I'll make it through because I'll I'll eat after all orders. Sushi or something. Hannah has had a good point about Danny. And whoever back? Yeah Doin' were there. One totally free zone like that was so obvious. Oh we went to kiss her on stage back home very producer driven they obviously the producers. Were obviously like Oh yeah. Give her a kiss at the end whenever that might have been their first. Kiss right all in the center date. He tried to kiss up on the day. That did not go well and she tried to. He tried to kiss her before they perform to and she gave him the cheek. Oh yeah like ending list where he went for the lips and she turned her face pretty quick. It was uncomfortable but she should have just kiss back on stage like knowing that like. That's part of. Yeah the competition in the talk about it after. I mean. They're trying to sell that. They're in love Roy. That's actually. That's like. When's them points with the judges? The showed isn't totally. They're not like you want it to be all about singing. But there's clearly a love component. I actually agree like if you WanNa fake your romance which shared and Julia might end up doing anyway. If you can get a record deal out of it than fuck it. It took American idol meets big brother. What if you're so in love and you find love your life on this show but you're not the best singing. Do you not win now. Thank you loose. Yeah well in three so you have to fall in love with the best singer. But they have the best voice to Chris. Noonan Rudy. I'd say Rudy in a couple of when it comes to sing I think rudy and Matt and Natasha and Ryan are probably the best congress of good all right talking about best together. Yeah that's fair Brian. Natasha don't make any sense as a couple but they all right together. Let's talk about. Let's talk about Ryan into Tasha because rotten I feel like producers. They edited this so it was like a big league. Natasha's voice was like this huge reveal because she had this dramatic moment walking on stage and she opened her mouth to sings. Riana and everyone was just blown away. Everyone was floored. Nobody was floored. More than Jason Mraz Jason. Jason was like this girl is soaring around. You can't Jason was he and how you can start your just there. Yeah like he was like be careful because she her career is going way up and kept saying Ryan's grade but like Tasha. I'm listening to music. I didn't think he was that meet like all. This music is very positive. Ripping People's throats out. This is why he was company. I feel like he kinda lying. I feel a little bad because you know you know. He seems like a Nice Guy Still. I'll say even though I don't want to but I feel like he just the settled down came from a place of. I don't WanNa get too high on myself. So he was like trying to be Mr Cool Humboldt. Whatever enew new that Jason Mraz was about to roast 'em any tried to like get in front of it and be like. Yeah I know I suck. I don't think I'm I don't think as good as Jason Mraz thinks that I think I am. I think it was because he kinda has a hint of a John Mayer by blow to them Jarnail episode. Kinda got us. Honor feels a little bit. Let's exactly what happened. I was like Oh my God. Ryan is a mixture of Shawn Mendez. John Aaron Harry Styles and now I wish I never said any of those things I wanna take it all back. I tweeted last night for the new research to this one. And you're like this made me actually. Ll and I hate when I'm like. Yeah I'm laughing in my own tweets but when I needed that Ryan looked Jacob Sartorius. I felt that we're looking at a fourteen year old. It was such a ruthless. It was such a ruthless tweet. What wh- who is the first person we talk also ways talking? Brian Kidd right to get a rose gave analysts. Cpr to get a rose when tosh again RYAN CPR. Given last week he stock her entire face into his mouth bass so someone says she sucked his course out of his mouth. Look them over for this. Like she's like Sula Dole his voice. Is this what you're talking about? Yes that's it. I could see that I hate that. Kid Yeah I sure Oh. And he's like also such a little Douche and snow effect. I mean he is a child but he's a minor but he's so we know he's like actually a child but I was just scrolling through through the tweets watching. I ll tweet literally went like Oh man it came from you know not it was a good one. The note about Natasha's Sucking Ryan's face. I said this last week We're used to seeing like weird little pecks on the bachelor and I get weirded out by those like Hannah and Peter they remember. I talked about their like bird like pack pack pack. It's nice to see some old fashioned making out. I will say to some deep throat show. Yeah it's nice to see it. Speaking that fantasy suites great content show together afterwards. Had A we have so many sneakers rules. Should we call them? Boys and girls are no rules people. Yeah we don't know any any of the rules let's send zoom to Rob Mills Right now. Toss them in here do you guys. Why don't you guys think about Jamie and Trevor? I think Jamie's really. Jamie seems very sweet but like she doesn't really know what's going on and I felt bad because she was so nervous to sing and she's like okay but there I just don't I just don't like trevor. They'll be like the famous ones. I think yeah I feel like they if any of them even are not really last. I think trump is gonNA fuck it up for row. There's absolutely no chance. Are there spoilers for the show like? Can we find out like who's still together like do? Do People Not Care Enough. I think there are oilers by haven't looked afraid. I don't WanNa know them. I don't WanNa know them but I'm just wondering if like they exist like if you could find out if Jamie Were still together I think. Yeah maybe real small doesn't keep tabs on this one. I don't know I don't think so. He's too busy following Vittoria after Iowa. That's insane the I know it actually is crazy and can be. Let's be happy. Yeah no I'm talking about insane following her I would. I would put myself in the category of like. Oh like good for you guys. That's sort of weird but cool doesn't hurt anybody like if she just moves. Iowa lives on a farm with Chris. Go ahead. This is what I don't even know who Kris Burley man to apple farmer like you know. He's Trent say try. And there's a bunch of we're all out there. There's a bunch of drives me. It's more surprising than anything. I'd like them being together. It's just like the randomness of it is is the most interesting part trade Iowa made a Barstool sports today. Pissy that frank posted him to do something. I don't know about the whole Kobe stuff as curious if you read it. I talk to Barstools now. I don't know what's going on in your out. I saw a headline coming out today. It's not great Victoria. settled for crystals as her Iowa. Man because she felt like she couldn't have you. I don't think she likes me. The has a degree what is but I did like. Oh what's who suitcase you took right. We did an instagram story. And I said give Victoria Patty or something and she was like whatever Barstool Trim. Oh Oh I'm actually a little scared of her for being. Yeah that's fair. Oh Tyler is that your dog. Try to get her in here. Your adorable she's horrible. That's that's adorable. Well is Danny Becker. Were the ones who sent. Were sent home transcend recapping the show on. I'm just I just wanted to throw that in there so we can say that we've finished talking about the show and now I can ask you guys how your your lives are House Corentin. How's it going a? I'm going to exit out of the cast page. Then that's all right. We're done talking about the show and I don't WanNa to hear about your life really. Do you know yeah. I Really WanNa hear your life. Wallet Hand. To go first please started with the recap. So you're prepared for this answer. You're not appropriate for the answer of how your life is guys what the fuck is going on over. It's like you can't answer a simple question. It's it's been good. We've been in San Diego the whole time. We drink wine every night match. Pretty good at lockdown. I feel like has been talks undoing. Cox Youtube Youtube Auburn. Who Do you work out coming soon? In Kill Hannah you have been. You have been crushing this time. Lots of good A lot of good content coming from me I will still in. Your talks are cool but had his way better. I don't I actually don't need. You can tell them this gets. I'm not going to tell them they sucked. Because you know I'm not GonNa if that's what he wants to do go for it like Zorro Taylor who's is the worst out of me rea- Tyler who's the worst talker talk. You're just you're just you're just really hot so yeah I mean if I have to rank at Dylan's going to be at the bottom. Yeah you're really hot. Minor Ridge original content creation and tyler. You have like an it's you but it's your friends and mats and Som- your brothers or in some like you never know using the mystery around it. What did they know is doing? I don't know I'm promoting on social media. Just naked right. Now he's aggressive. I'm going to turn it off again. We know I love those like like fifth grade back. I know now I came back for the picture I love. It has every sticker every bosses Ford seeing there literally like I look like. I'm in my baby's bedroom like a nursery friend. Where are you? I'm in my boyfriend's MOM's house and this is like the room that her grandchildren stay in. So let me. Mommy when you're in that room like I feel like I'm young again right. It's very youthful. I. There's a crab with. Can we talk about aliens. Existing? Do trending on twitter and totally exist. So let's take it a step. Further brought me coffee this morning and the first thing he said he said had I woke up in the first thing he said was handed. There's actually aliens there's some there's some declassified info that got posted yesterday and okay we're talk last direction action these these. Bao's about for a while. Now Yeah they have slot sleight of hand. Just stay educate yourself. Can you guys explain to the people who don't know what's going on Apparently they're like the CIA or whatever government declassified videos of. Ufo's that the navy got. I don't know videos been around for a while. They've just been confirmed. I find it very convenient. That now's the time. That is the big part though that they they are introducing. It like they're acknowledging these are close and we don't know what to do my thing is too and there's videos and they're all talking about what is this thing and they're like freaking out in their following their like did. I don't know what it is. And it's like you can hear like the highlands or whatever I always just pitcher aliens like part being. They're like they're just like having a good time making talks wherever they are the aliens. We've heard Roddy originally years ago. Agosto ahead of us. Yeah that's what I picture. I feel like they just look at us and they're like stupid aunt so you're not really as stupid things colonizing that little sad. Yeah about US earth. Well actually love animals so I would never call and stupid but I kind of I kind of see Anton Worse. I kind of see where you're coming from Tyler. Yeah kind of this. Conversation has really taken guys goddess stores. I loved dinosaurs. Dinosaurs were trick claw. Dinosaurs happening could you imagine I used to be like my Mba classes in the bag? I was really trying to study and learn. I'm back your youtube ing dinosaurs. Could you imagine dinosaurs walked this Earth Today? Like tearing gators alligators are dinosaurs. Time we try and ride one not like that but like like around you know what I mean. Like we might. He's an exactly what you're looking. You didn't have to qualify that anything. Imagine being a out of football game and then all of a sudden like pterodactyl wet. The lighter mascots just a dinosaur. No no I'm not talking about Ascot's Scott's somebody turned articles coming in were. Yeah no I know. But they haven't like chained up Georgia bulldog. Biking game of thrones when she rides on the dragon but yeah bigfoot from land before time yes like in real life those as the sesame. Three football fields. That's pretty carefully. It would be dangerous. What do you what do you I was watching? The show. Debuted GonNA think that we're all so stoned very sleek believable? That giants were on view. Awesome okay thank you or rehousing search. Yes Riyadh I was watching the Dave earlier. Do you guys walk to show? What Little Dicky on Hulu I've seen the phone. No but it looks. It looks funny though. Yeah it's alright it's entertaining enough But I watched the last episode and in this episode in spoiler alert. Somebody doesn't want be spoiled by Soft but anyways they run over like a rabbit that's on the road and they get out and the girlfriends like. Oh my God we have to see it. And he's like a now. It's sad but it's a rabbit like we're just GONNA leave it. How would you feel if you ran over a rabbit on the road? Got Out and saw you just keep going or the rabbit avert amore dramatic experience Tyler Ruin. The floor is yours. Also please go ahead. I was I was driving after Corbett here where people go and everything and I was in my Frank Cave. He's showing a little car. We're going to be new. People hopping their big trucks. And we ran. She ran over. I got a little baby pig and I. It was the cutest little Paul ever and it was so upsetting we were all so shook it so sad the residential that's worse than a rabbit. One of those moments are not meeting to laugh definitely not funny but it's wildly uncomfortable no choice but to let out of jail. That's also also like petting a dog. What are we saying Germany? Say Yeah I mean just to say him. Sorry what do you do like a is kind of drive? I that's the jobs before you just you. Just your mobile reflect first second on big access and then you got a great aunt. Appreciate things around you. The people in France and then well guys thanks for coming harsh. That goes full circle. We all stay. That's one hundred percent state. I can't go anywhere. That's staying at hand. I feel like you said like we can maybe wrap up the podcast. That way like that was so nice and motivational. Like your life and your friends. Yeah guys. Don't take him hit. Give us given the wild pigs. Live your life in no. I'm just GONNA ADULT AIR. That hit a motivational speech. You love doing toasts. Let's do a toast. Let's do tell us yes. The rattlesnakes finished tyler. Okay cheers an even though we're all at home take this time. Enjoy it and we'll be telling our grandkids about it one day and don't try to get too many hangovers during all this and felt like series. Awkward like four's maid of honor speech was bad. She turned away well. We have been wedding planning. That just reminded me about about it. Let's not wrap up. Let's talk about the wedding. Forgot about that team's going. So who decides like Web plates forks? I decided we're not like into details or anything. We're just like talking about it for fun. And what it was joke about giving live so. I guess it's like kind of getting into the details wedding planner. Yeah before this comes out you. Are we going to be invited ethnic? That's a stupid question but I I would say I would say yes definitely but okay. So yes but think about really. You have to buy Bali to go to this wedding or something and I think he's GonNa be in California. Yeah because we wanted to be accessible but the but the but is so we have one hundred people at the engagement party each by fifty and didn't do plus ones. I didn't realize how big the amount of like group of people could get. I guess like if I only in by fifty people right. That's nothing right when it's like yeah fan or family and friends or whatever they each get a plus one so that's one hundred and he does the same thing only fifty people plus one this to ready to some swipes during your wedding. Yeah exactly you know like more. It's a yes but what we're saying. Nancy exactly one chance. Yeah like Ria can be my date and I would be on it. Yeah Yeah Tyler. Who's your day. Who from Bachelor Nation would be your date? Nobody take trae threesome. Yeah I I'll tell you guys take each other. Yeah perfect if we if we invite seventy five people each which like family and friends. That's three hundred people. If everyone gets. I don't know how people decide who like who comes and goes like I don't see people have a small wedding because it's your sister. Yeah my is getting married. And she's inviting fucking every Sunday at three hundred people. Y- yeah but I think it's getting comments only income. Whatever it is but it was to be June twelfth and. I don't think that's happening anymore. Three hundred people. She's going to have to let know that. This is ABC really excited. It's sad but I broke up a global pandemic. Yeah this is a happy anymore though. Poun- well no no. It's still a half. It just pushed out. Yes so whenever it happens anybody's Trot Tra. I knew you still. Oh Man I turn on the sound. Oh boy we can up. Oh my microphone just went out. Yeah your microphone is up guys. So when do you guys yeah to burn off twenty one years light? No no no no. No no course lied. Wrap IT UP. Because my mic is toast. Okay okay guys That wraps up the listen to your heart. Recap that wasn't a recap. It was just a lot of fun with our friends. Thank you tyler for finally coming on the PODCAST. Thank you Hannah for finally coming on the PODCAST Dylan. Thank you for being a recurring guest. We appreciate you Trent. You know that we appreciate your on every single week and sometimes I think you don't WanNa be here but I know you do on the inside. I say that every time talking about Trent. I'm kidding I'm kidding Thank you guys for joining us. And hopefully we'll do this again some other time when we can get everyone. Together cheers. Cheers cheers cheers. Something breath empty chairs. Thank you mother's Day's coming up. And the best way to celebrate. Your mom is with flowers specifically one eight hundred flowers dot com right now when you order early at one. 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One eight hundred flowers dot com to order thirty tulips for thirty nine. Go to one eight hundred flowers dot com click the radio icon and enter code checks. That's one eight hundred flowers dot com code chicks. Hurry this offer ends Friday. We are here with to a very special guest. Jonathan Davis and Rudy Ponco from Netflix. In New Show Outer Banks. They play J. J. M. Pope. Obviously we have become one big outer banks stand podcast. Yes Oh welcome to the show guys much. Yeah it's been crazy. We've done nothing but talk about the show for the last. Maybe two weeks now where we can half and people are going to be super excited to see that you guys are on as well. This is kind of a sneaky. Addition that I feel like people are going to be really a pumped about We're super excited to talk to you guys about the show. We just had chased N. Madeline on there are episode. That came out today. We had a ton of fun talking to them The first thing we did with them was they just kinda explain like how they got involved with the show in how they were cast in that process which I think is always super interesting so we would love to hear that from the two of us. Well Gee one go sure well rudy and I wherein the first ever chemistry for the show way way way up in like February that dude yeah last February sure. Yeah it was a while ago and We kind of like it was weird because railroad he was like I was reading for John and like Afterwards I remember we kinda hung out and like me and really really like connected. Let me on like beyond like the like yet remember. Yeah we were like we like we like to check in together and like I was like I remember. I remember saying like hang out with this dude despite the show no we also tell them the story. I like some Jump Street. Walk by and we will all of a sudden like look over an ally. That's how that's how we have the exact same taste in women. Like the exact same taste it's uncanny and it's like literally like it every time we go out we look each other like we won't again cause problems for you guys though you guys like fight over girls or you're like oh no you got that one you got the next one. Never come up. It never has never come probably paper scissors or something. You guys seem inseparable though I will say and we talked to chase madeline about this and they were talking about how you guys just really like the Improv. That you guys do is out of this world and the chemistry in what you guys were saying. You hit it off right off the bat we would he say I think our chemistries that comes with good taste in anime and that comes with being there it is. You've got mattress for I completely forgot we have. We have matching xeroxing. Sure order if I'd known I told you commit. Wow that was a missed opportunity for you guys to match on this. Let's insurance you ask your shirt. I'm wearing our outer banks. Shirt rotates so we can sit on the back. That saw that exact Sir I would love. Yes where we're GONNA get them to you guys where there's really no way to be like. Hey you want to ask a stranger for your address. Let me give you my mailing address. So we're GONNA make sure that Netflix skits. It's you guys list the at the same time we want. Netflix is nine where we did to come over and ask for still watching and stuff like that is not knock on the door. You guys are play- playing to washing the Ron Hulu or something like chain read in the back to what we're saying about how you guys got started. Did you think that you guys hadn't easier audition process than some of the other customers or do think like were you nervous that you weren't GonNa get it? You know you were GonNa get it where we're and the character switch. 'cause I mean you said you read for John B I WanNa do you WanNa talk about? We've never told that story in an interview before all right underneath mentioned in several of his interviews but The story goes. I flew out the Charleston without character attached to my name and I had read for Rafe. Jj John B Rafe again to Giambi. So I'd read for. I think like you know total about seven times when I flew out to Charleston. I was thinking under the impression I was going to John. B I but then they're like we don't really know where you're at. We did the chemistry read in Charleston. And they're like yeah got like. I was worried I was terrified. I'm going to get this. There was a time where Where we basically cast like. I was cast rediscuss. John be Jira and they had Knicks Rila. Who PLAYS BARRY CAST? Jj at one point in time and that was Kinda the cast are you can forget it was. It was really strange win. Kim's read and then they were like Roh bringing in three new GIAMBI's But we want you to read as Jj in Jami was out of the question. So I screwed up Giambi then I here's this is this is gonNA be heart You guys are going to be like. Aw I call jd up the night. Before I'm GonNa go into the auditions eleven tonight because we have said this. I'm like Bro. Can you help me with this? I had three new scenes that are like three pages long to like four pages long. I've been working as John D for the past two weeks. Can you help me find? Jj any comes down and we work it until at what was one. Two in the morning to end huge. Dude you have it. Get Rest and bring it brilliant on. I told him I told him like I was like I remember telling him. I went down there and I was like you keep doing it as John D. But you have dislike this like vulnerability that I think you can bring to. Jj that'll really make them like that. That'll push his character. Because I personally would just that kind of grungy dude like he wasn't he wasn't didn't have the vulnerability that Rudy I think is going to give. And then when he did I remember. It was a scene where he was like. It was a scene in the show. He's telling confronted convince John to get the tanks from Cameron vote. That was one of his audition scenes and I was like I was like right there. There was a line of something like we have nothing else to lose them. Like you've gotta hit that line right there because that that is jj character. He has nothing to lose right. He's a junkyard dog for his friends. You know offering tear to my eye. I'm not eating and killed him. I keep frigging does in their chase. Kill it like where do you rudy and chase for the underdogs for the rules for a long time and they like they just both like like Giambi and JJ? They've really took their opportunities. And we're like we'RE GONNA we're GonNa give everything we got right ear you know. I think everybody was like thought that the audition we take our opportunity. We got nothing. I got nothing to lose at this point. We're already we're already he was. He was a frigging dishwasher. Cheesecake Factory Avenue shoe salesman. Like I say salesman but I worked in the department I was basically customer service and like and like we were just like we got nothing to lose man who either we get these parts. We don't Yes kinda like took the script and related to your own life really like we have nothing to lose in the scene and also in real life at the same time What who would you guys say is the most like their character. At least like their character. I feel like people have asked you this before but everybody always says me but I think that's wrong eighty dollars. It'd be like Yo your pumped it but like years Jaydee your way weslend than Pope. You'll learn also like I do think you care more about kind of other people. Can't you have a bigger case? Nigger hearth EMPO-. I because you love me so much and I think I'll and I think this is about to make me cry for podcast. I love you back so much. It's just it's just so real inorganic honest united. I think if you know who I think is most like the character and I'm Gonna. Throw her the bus New Jersey. She's a lot more character. He's not as she's got that like Ed she's she's Great. I Love Caroline and she's out at least like their character I would say rudy just because like he's so sweet so sweet innocent man. He's like he's got that like he's he's like a lot like jj now he's like unpredictable. He's got that like he's got that to him but he's like he's like so much like sweeter and. I don't think he'd ever shoot anybody I I don't know I need to bring it on a Texas. We go to church shooting range or something. I think the funniest thing that I keep seeing right now is the memes about jj taking out the gun. Like the Kris Jenner memes or like the bang. Bang just like Every point did you while you were reading the script. Did you ever think okay? I'm actually going to shoot somebody or were you let down every time you don. I knew judge would never use the gun on somebody I think I think. Jj would threaten him. When I read the scene about with his dad when he was gonNA shoot him in the head. There's a moment of like is actually going to do it. I think I knew what my head. I was so into magician that it's not possible. Jj would actually use on scared records. It I don't know I. I think it's a thing like I thought the thing was. Yeah I thought it was going to be something that was latched onto it. Actually in culture to be honest I didn't think the government's GONNA be such A. Are you kidding me? You gave me jokes about it on say like literally I think I think I think when he brings that gun into the he's about to bring into the hotel. I think it was really a thing of at that point. It wasn't me mindset. Where like hey I think bringing a gun into a hell. Hotel is a really stupid stupid idea. Yeah yeah is it was it was on set for sure like Jj and has done the best. The best love story in the whole show dog being Sarah who? Jj during the gun. Well speaking of love stories we see hope and Kiara get together at the end of the season. But I'm seeing a lot of people really root for JJ Kiara. Where do you guys stand on that for season two Jenny? Well I think honestly. Jj He would be a fun thing that happened in season like three or four. But I don't think season to something that's GonNa be so like apparently because I mean not. Let anybody down. I think I think there's something else that Pope Aqui haven't had the opportunity expressed. I think there's something about a relationship that has been shown And I think they should get that. I think there's a little bit of a cuter affect the pope. Not that they haven't yet so Yeah I was like. I'm kind of on the same page like it's like you know. I trust are writers or writers are really good. I'm sure they have a plan for all these characters. The Popa key thing when we were when when it first came up came out of nowhere for us for a little bit like just like it came out of nowhere for the party into came out of nowhere to us. Because you know I thought I was like 'cause we thought like Oh that she might staging because the like the line but then I was also reminded of the lime in the beginning where I tried the door. It's locked for me and I was like he did say that but I don't know it's it's it's a younger girl drama. You never know things can change relationship strength and those young adult dramas do a phenomenal job of at some point giving us some kind of epic love triangle. And that could be that could be. It is there's always there's always want to know love square dummy. Jj Anki like. I guess it is. It does say all of us have a hot succeed like we kinda thing for. Yeah I think the writer talked to. I talked to the writer about what he would do. Unlike what would you do further this relationship? And it was real. It was pretty interesting. Like they're dynamic was interesting for me like from an acting perspective to Kinda like explore what that would be like you know so like. I'm just like I'm ready to see what I mean. I think the fan reaction to it is amazing. I get many like people telling me like you should break up with yarn. Like I'm not actually dating a real life. That's just a character I play but then I get just as many people like like open key are like my favorite like. I hope they would be together from the beginning. So you get both of it you know. And that's what's great about like a good like love kind of thing you have characters you like. You want to see the character to be happy. I think if I think if key would have ended up agenda at the end of the season you would have just as many people talking about. Oh pinky because you want everybody in the show to be APP you'd like these characters and you want everybody to be happy so I think you know like Judas guarantee he'll get he'll get. I'm pretty sure that all the characters will end up where they need to end up and ready to go ahead guys. Doing myself was the one with key like shoddy wants off three. And it's like a Dombi guessing you akiem focusing and then like putting sunglasses on Jayjay. That's the same thing. It's the same energy. Yeah exactly the same kind of love No I was GonNa say you guys had to learn a lot for the show I feel like between boating and fighting in swimming in all these different things we talked about. Just like the fighting situation. Rudy you there. I mean there's a lot of fights for you. There's a lot of fights. How do you guys manage to to learn that choreography? Get through that without actually hurting somebody Jamie. Don't you want to give the never never ever get off? Camera is right here. It's a gopher punching from Deir. It'd be crossed the camera behind the desk. So toby though for Robin Will- Stung. Would you act? It's fun fact? Most of our stunt guys from hydrocare Bian and then chases guy was captain. America Mike. My Guy was falcon from. He was a he played. Falcon Anthony Mackie's character very experienced team there so you were you the ones actually like doing the fake fighting or your stunt double We did everything like Jonas brothers nineties in their You'll be like throw the scientists in there just for safety and then Jonas stops making like all right we're having having the actors do and the We actually killed it in the theater. Scenes Nader fight dude shut. That twice never can post Emerson supposed to be stunned. He's doing that scene. And then it turned out to just be like no you just did it and I think what is us. You can fill those punches. Like they'd let you feel like when somebody getting hit. It hurts you more than it does when it's like. Oh this looks really cool. You know look way better. They make a much cleaner than we could ever do. Is definitely wailed on by drew drew. I know sorry you're watching Austin. Rust almost killed me. You definitely getting choked out. I was getting choked out. I mean every single time. The new guys fought each other. It seemed like you guys were on the verge of death with listen. I know it's not supposed to be funny. But by like the fourth fight laughing I was like almost dead every single time. Good somehow they survive. I mean the first the for I think it's the first episode when JJ takes out the gun at the beach and topper is drowning. John B and you're like he's going to murder him right now just in the middle of each. I WanNa know how that was shot. Because is he actually getting his head stuck into the water like what what's good? They're like he's down there but he's he's not like they're not like he's not forcing him under what's happening right by the water. Yeah okay. There's something awesome point on. I'm just GonNa shout glass if you look closely in that. Take Austin. The guy that plays topper has his hands around. Jason's net around his shoulders. And it's like you can. It looks like he's just like tries to give him a massage but like it was like here. So then she's lift up this edit. He needed to be news actually drowning. You can lift up at chase stuck his head under though. Yeah AUSE WE ALL. We all made a pact. When we started this that we go one hundred percent every time. Sometimes it went over over the last five. We definitely went over the Knicks. The holidays I definitely need them in the face earth Simon in our I clicked through once. I got clipped. Ones is just like stuff happens. You guys why the show is so good. 'cause you guys went out because you guys are really finding you're GonNa get you could just tell how into it you guys were and obviously this is the biggest right the biggest show you guys have done in your careers but you guys the entire cast absolutely nailed it and it was almost like why haven't we seen these people before you know what I mean so you guys really did a great job in everything. Yeah thank you to shut up. The Lord like our castrates is lower shifts in for like half way blanking. I thought you were playing. I was trying to. I should help you out here and for For casting because like you know it takes it takes like casting studios really like betting on unknown to Kinda get something new and special in data cast people like end can kind of you know work. Welded unluckily noticed names. He didn't want anybody Already established because he thought they were going to have a legal on sandbags out. I WANNA do a mom but Which I remember Jonas was like When Jonas I don't want anybody WHO's not actually sixteen. Twelve and his wife was like if you get actors they can play it. Well yes he didn't he didn't want actors at one at one point he wanted to make it like really really didn't want actors. I will say the thing about everyone not being sixteen a blessing because all these girls are like obsessed with all of your characters and then everyone's going to check and be like. Oh my God thank God. They're not sixteen like the amount of DMZ. I received being like I looked up their age and I was so relieved to find out. They were not sixteen chases. Seventeen take her to her. This is just turned eighteen. Legals is the crew is no it was. It is funny because the reaction has been so crazy. I think like you said it has a lot to do with the fact that people are meeting you guys for the for the first time and kind of falling in love with you as actors and characters. I've seen so many people say like where have all these people been there? All so great. Everybody works so well together. When did you guys kind of realize that this show is GonNa like explode the way it has been dandruff jobs maybe like a day or two after a dropped like we were like? Oh it's like you have people tell you like Oh this is going to do really well on your thanks person. Who's also working on the same project in job next year? Like we're like we. I think we just when we were shooting. We just Kinda focused on having fun like beyond shooting it like with the cast and crew like we just had fun together as a family. I think I can. I do Y- I'm so sorry but in reality good what I was I would. I think he's trying to say is that we are so comfortable cast crew everybody. We failed so fast that we were so comfortable to be around each other. That gave us the freedom of win. That camera was rolling literally BE SOBER LAST. Which is key for an actor. It's really hard to do your job with feeling under pressure in. It's like getting in your head. We felt so at home while that camera were up was rolling. Hardest was only reservoir after professional activity. Bunko bedroom inaccurate. I take my job very seriously. And when that camera wasn't rolling and you were just so comfortable with everybody onset Cast that it was just like a tribute to like. Oh we can do our job and be who we are off Wannabe onset We weren't wearing like networks like the producers came. But they weren't like there every day so it's like we really just had time to kind of like you know be ourselves set ourselves in the scene. Sometimes that matched I. I think I read somewhere that somebody already said like. We didn't know sometimes when the cameras rolling and then we would go back and watch the show like holy crap like that's in there. How long did you guys actually film? For six months of six months plus a month recruits. Yeah what did you guys? You guys shot in Charleston. What was did you love shooting in Charleston? I know a lot of people are like. Oh it's not in the banks but there's good reasons for that but you guys are in Charleston. How how did you like? Did you add this wrong? How did YOU ENJOY CHARLESTON ENJOY CHARLESTON? I enjoyed volunteer thing Banks Dude I feel like if there was a production team in the outer banks just so wrong. That place is so unique in. It's a that putting up production crew and cast on the Outer Banks. That'd be like just be like putting fricken out annella putting the production team on the pier. I it's not enough space and And then it's like it's like if anybody wanted to shoot. There was Jonas pate director. You know like we would love he he would like we would absolutely love to go shoot. They're just like you know. Like like as he said like things always work. You want him to even put out Sorry even when I put out the Merch that we made for Outer Banks and obviously it's for the show but I had so many people that are actually from the Outer Banks. Were so mad at me like at another stand but I did across your mind if it was like outer banks slash shot in Charleston. Lie just put that up there like we just put like Parentheses Charleston until. You can't really see it up and hilarious if we did that but I honestly I was just like all right. I guess just going to ignore this because think about the people actually show that are dealing with people saying this end Fran Kinda related to Jersey. Shore came out and all the people from Jersey and Jersey shore like this is not the Jersey shore although that's reality. Tv show a different outer banks but or with any spirit lengthy show like the Sopranos too. Like the they're like that's not North Jersey. Like and it's it's sometimes you just can't go. You just gotTa you gotTa take it in. Charleston is an amazing amazing city. They really welcomed us with open arms. We Love we love going out in the city the first night by Bailey. Judy been there so like dude. The first the first season of shooting in Charleston was a dream. Because you could go out and nobody recognized. Nobody recognized US already how we went out to like a blind tiger countless times we had a great time there and nobody knew what we would therefore it was great. They knew were supposed to be there. They just didn't know what comes around. We're going to like good luck to them. But now that bad right like oh you guys are gonNA get bombarded. I hate to break it to you but How has been like overnight fame Ben because obviously before this started your followers and whatnot? Were not as much as it is now and now you guys have gained hundreds of thousands of dollars in like a week. Well that's all that's the proof that the ATP really be definitely being like well. This is fun. I guess I guess people like it like we just like we call each other like we don't sometimes you don't even talk about the show. We'll talk it's usually mash. Rosie really play Smash Bros Remember. I think the first you know what the first time I realized it was crazy. It was I just called Rudy and I was like Hey. Do you WanNa live in places like just like this. Because I thought it'd be fun you know not because I was like trying to promote promote the show. Where like be like you know like get I following the supper whatever. Let's just going places masters because I want people to see the ANA chief but a over a thousand people join US laying smashed grows and that's when I was like holy crap. You know this is actually crazy. Have you guys had any face to face reaction or because you? Everyone's been kind of on lockdown. You haven't had that moment yet. That's insane like not really. Have you seen what you do? And everyone's wearing masks when you go to your like you can't even see you can't even tell who it is and you might kind of chuckling because I'm like. I wonder if anybody's yeah. I'm like when I went to go get my sister to pick up. I took my sister to a school to pick up some stuff from her locker. We were all wearing masks. He's also distancing and like I was like I was like I know some of these teenagers show. Oh you're thinking to yourself. You're like I'm pope found out. I did find out later that one of my sisters you remember Gic broody do you remember when we went to my sister's sisters play? You remember that kid who was like who was wearing the makeup and we were like hanging out with those two policemen. Yeah that was like the kid called my sister's like I didn't know they were on like a show like this is like a performing arts school so like they're like they're like that all the time but he was like freaking out odd so cute. That's such a good way to describe it. They're like on a real show that a lot of my family members who I told about it like years years like a year before I was told him I was like okay and then like I'll get a call later like I didn't know you were like serious uttam around. It's Mom Dad. It's a show to show to show so you just called him. Jj By accident. Do you guys do that often or owner. You were you guys talking like onset where you calling each other by your actual names whereby asks names plenty to take over like like chase. Listen Yeah but like I know joke I would call you. Pope onset all the time even probably offset call every once in a while. It'll slip you ever call John. Be Just John. I feel like that's super frowned. Upon are called. I call him John in the show person. We never call there by the names. Like I don't think I ever called chase. John be like on accident. Remember why jumpy like it. Just doesn't Absolu- Yes. A lot of energy goes into like saying Giambi like we laughed and we were watching even like the really emotional scenes when he when he fell fifty feet and just broke his wrist and and and Sarah was like joppy. Ciampi like saying job. I was like I point. You just drop the be like when you're panicking that instead. Here's my theory. I don't even know if this is true. I'm named John. My Name's John And you have to say is distinguishable by saying John B Right Aj. And I can't I mean I don't know why he'll just be John. His Dad is also named John is that is that John. John Makes Sense if you have if his dad is named John. You have to call them something that's not John. Yeah right and growing up you probably would say John J J two separate them but now his dad is gone is already so we as not your friends. We don't understand in the friend group. You would understand it. Even when they get a gone with Jay Bidi Bidi. Yeah my dad my real life. My Real Dad is John and my little brother J. B. They're both John. No there you go since the last episode when they wake up in the water and Sarah's like John P I'm just drowning after your mouth so it is. It is very funny but you guys we. The show absolutely left is on a massive cliff hanger. I think I don't want to jinx anything but I feel like season to hopefully looks good because we are not. Everybody is loving the show. Everybody's talking about it watching it. Where would you guys like to see your characters in in season two Rudy Gobert? Y'All would you please please just? He's going to decide what to say after. You say I'M GONNA I'm GonNa say everything that you didn't say it out copy Hope pummeled the grape of the dog. I really WANNA do. We're a two inches away for being the Scooby Doo. Gang as it is if you're going to the end but like why not. I think like protection. There's that mean going around. I want jagged Protection all right the be real. I think I think since the POS are kind of in the slums ran out because they all think GIAMBI's dead. I think we drift apart. The posts are no longer the pogues in. It's like rick are what what's what's what's the saying is the season one is sitting chemistry and all that stuff and then. Napa find that account lines dealing with like minded again when John Becomes back and Ben all of a sudden ward is served justice and he gets thrown in the the the the pan stuff like that And I just WANNA I really want it to be different actually. I wanted to chemistry to be different at first but then it comes back to. I like that idea I like. I like the idea of like of having to rebuild the friendship. You know because then you can see like because then you can go to like you like you know. It's a friendship now. Let's see how it started. Why they friends in the first place? You know you kind of get their friends. But I think it's a good opportunity to explore like well why you know. Why do these people latch onto light all our separate storylines? Jj's in hard drugs now just just rave for and all of a sudden hard drugs and as a token like I say relationship is like struggling a little bit Yuppie like maybe there have been dating for a while now like who knows maybe they haven't dated at all maybe they haven't even talked about the kiss since the chemistry is like so real Gi's like what you want to drink a beer. In now. I want to. That's the main thing I want to see if poems where pope ended at the end of the season that confidence is his anger. I want to see if that moves into season two. I feel like it's like this big. I feel like it would kind of right. Hope lacking hothead now dollar ship dreams have gone down the tubes. Who WANTS TO C? J. Pope smokes like the bigly. Talk Yara Sarah One just like that same kind of vibe but with Jj Info Avenue. Yeah that would be fantastic. We go for that. Cast me hadn't seen I mean every time I talked to cast on my k. Put me in season two just as like an extra hour back news. Komo probably would probably make. Yeah I've just not. I'm like to Netflix. Because I'm not saying that friend and I really put outer banks over the top. Maybe just a little bit. I don't know if you look if you look at the time. Line it all cutting can start you see it start to yeah the way we ended the last interview with Jason Madeleine. I asked them about the I would die for Giambi Movement So we started that but people are like listen. I would die for JJ. I would die for pope. I would die for key. I would die for everybody. How do you guys feel about that? It's like a lot of pressure on you to have people saying that they would die for you. Lease it situation. I don't do that. Don't know if push comes to shove they would live down for you guys feel like that's that's really the more yes. I personally would actually die for you guys John Bands and being like I say. Thank you to everybody that spans in the league the frigging world goodness gracious but I do. This is my heart thing unless you does you. Guys are folks for sure. That's very harry styles of you a rudy. We have almost how'd you? Jj to the we re. And I have also decided that you your double Ganger. Is Harry Styles? The blonde haired styles don't let for to your head to similar similarly burs time and Harry if you on. I know you're listening Eric. The wires I just WanNa say like there's definitely worse people compared to your hands looking guy. please out. Can you be prepared to believe like just take it from one day? Can you ever be like? Oh you know what you look like Rudy Palko. Just just a good flip around. Well actually. We'll start saying when we talk about Harry styles will be like you know. Harris thousand really really looks like Rudy. He knows like wow I never saw. The Harry looks like Ruby like amazingly. Well thank you guys so much for joining us. If you have in streamed already clearstream outer banks on Netflix. They were the number one show this week. So let's keep it there keep streaming and hopefully we gotta season two which. I think that we will thanking minds talking with us. Pleasure I seek pleasure. I`Ma we're going all right. That wraps up this episode of chicks in the office. We hope you guys enjoyed it. We hope we keep entertaining you guys and thank you to all of our essential workers out there and keep going to work aware at home. We thank you. We love you and we'll talk to you on Monday. Jong had them talk. Okay this stay frozen Turkey job offer. WanNa Talk Okay. Ours have to every day. You Love Someone Donna Repeal Obama. Please tell me why there's a career strong s blaze

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Jason Mraz On 'Look For The Good'; Older People Grapple With Technology

Here & Now

42:41 min | 7 months ago

Jason Mraz On 'Look For The Good'; Older People Grapple With Technology

"From NPR and WBZ. Im Tanya Moseley. I'm Jeremy Hobson. It's here and now the. Us economy continues to hemorrhage jobs at a staggering pace. The Labor Department said today that the number of people filing new jobless claims hit four point. Four million last week bringing the total over the last five weeks to twenty six million Americans from. Let's bring Allie Val she. Msnbc ANCHOR and economics correspondent Ali when you put the numbers another way that means approximately sixteen percent of the American workforce is now unemployed unheard of level since the Great Depression. Right we've fast. We far surpassed Two thousand nine the recession which was ten percent. These are not official rates. The official unemployment rate for America's four point four percent. But that's because we haven't measured anything past the middle of March when the state home stuff started going to affect when you look at the jobless claims where you get that sixteen percent number If you add up all of this year unemployment claims so far through the middle of April are almost twenty nine million people now just to give you some perspective in nineteen eighty two the entire year. That was a bad year as a recession was thirty point. Four million people filed for unemployment claims. Two thousand nine was the second worst recession. Twenty nine point eight We're GONNA overtake both those numbers within a week. So by the end of April we will have beat everything until the recession. This is it just. There's no historical comparison to this. It's it's it's these numbers are at a scale. We're just not used to seeing when you look at who has lost Jobs Pew study found. Fifty two percent of low income families have someone who've lost job compared with just thirty two percent of higher income families. Why are some workers struggling more? And do you think layoffs will start to happen more equally the longer? This drags on no. Unfortunately the difference between now and the last recession Is that this is is disproportionately hitting people Who Look recessions always hurt people who are the worst off? The lowest wage earners the ones who are not on contracts one who easily be laid off the distinction between now and the last recession is more women because of the types of work that is stopped. More women are being laid off. Obviously the hospitality industry is very hard. Hit and those are people who are in particularly low wages because in many cases they were augmented by By tips but believe it or not. Hospitals are slashed icing staff forty-three thousand health positions Were were slashed in March. That's the worst that we've seen more than thirty years. Lots of other things. Keep in mind the things that aren't happening right. Waste Management Garbage collection warehousing education Scientific Industries a lot of technical things that aren't happening so it's across the board But it is disproportionately affecting low wage. Earners and what kind of strain is This putting on state governments as Senate Majority Leader Mitch. Mcconnell said yesterday that states should consider bankruptcy today. Michigan's Governor Gretchen. Whitmer said that's irresponsible. But at all these unemployment claims has got to be putting a lot of pressure on the states yes and and unlike the federal government which can go into debt and print. Money States can't do that. States can't go into debt. They can issue bonds for but take your projects building a bridge or a dam or something like that but they can't go into date debt nor can city so the only option for states and cities is to cut expenses. Now cutting expenses. Means the things that you get your garbage collection police ambulance at a very time when we don't need that but there's an estimate that states could be five hundred dollars In the hall over the next two years because of the extra costs and the lower revenues. They're getting because people aren't working. Msnbc ANCHOR and economics correspondent Ali. Thanks as always. There's also a battle brewing between several governors who pushed to reopen states and city mayors. Who are adhering to guidelines? That experts say will slow the spread of the corona virus and the state of Tennessee. The governor says the vast majority of businesses will be allowed to reopen on May first and joining us to talk about. This is John. Cooper Mayor Tennessee's capital and biggest city Nashville and Mayor Cooper models from the University of Washington. Say Tennessee should wait until mid or late. May to reopen. Your governor is talking about next week. What are your plans to reopen is? Is that really too soon for Tennessee. Well boy. All models are wrong. But they're quite informative. We in Nashville have data's variable but we've had a lot of good news you know. Yesterday we had only twenty six new cases. Today's a lot more than that. What is the average on a weekly basis? We're all working together. We have to have a restart and restart has to be safe and a not not a restart gets undone by improper implementation in Tennessee. Metro cities are allowed to have a little bit of a different path. But we're all basically on the same schedule. We're hoping to be a few weeks. Away from a phased restart and the early phases. We'll still be pretty tough until a data driven trigger happens into gently moving through the different phases to where we can mostly all get back to work. I want to ask you though about the tough times that you're talking about and the reopening. Are you worried at all about Nashville hospitals bearing the brunt of reopening? I mean people from outside of your your county getting sick and coming to Nashville for care. Well I of course am. It's one of the conditions for being to talk about reopening But right now in Nashville hospitals we only have sixty or seventy cases. Now this is a blessing because a few weeks ago we were talking about opening a fourteen hundred bed emergency center which nobody believes is needed in the current environment. Now if there's a trigger and we relapse then of course. We need to go and do that. But you're in a city here. We don't have that many hospitalizations Completely blast we've only had twenty two deaths in Nashville. That's the tough thing to say. Only but if you look around the country that is only figuring out how to restart and a gentle and safe. Manner is a good timely project. The trick is to get the public to understand. You can't get to the first phase unless you have the metrics that allow you to do that. And the daily reports are report card. All of us you know like other cities You're facing and credible economic pressure as tax revenue drops. You've proposed a property tax hike to make up for that which would be as high as twenty percent. You had previously voted against a property tax increase. How did you decide that that was the right solution? You decide things when you have no choice. We have multi hundred million dollar budget hole in Nashville where based on sales taxes from hospitality to a big degree so the loss is particularly severe and ultimately local governments have to have balanced budgets. You can't borrow money. We're not getting federal help for this. I mean I think. Would you like to have more federal government and they? They've put out federal help but they loved on a shelf. We can't get to under conditions that do not help. Cities repair their budget problem in paying for police and teachers and so a lot of cities are having to go to lay offs. We're GONNA take a path. Here of protecting our employees getting ready for a restart. We hope it sooner rather than later. Now we have a very low property tax here in Nashville also so we can raise our property tax and still be competitive. But we're doing it because there's no choice. We had a lot of financial problems before this and then this is just pushed us over the edge. That's Nashville mayor. John Cooper. Thank you so much for this. Update on it without history. Artists have depicted viruses in creative and sometimes cartoonish ways to make sense of something. We can't see with the naked eye. Npr's Ulaby reports on how we picture disease back. When we first started anthropomorphized. Something invisible people did not even really know what disease was so these the images that made sense little figures of demons that were physically attacking the body. That's Jared Gardner. He's a professor who studies medicine and popular culture. He says the grim reaper and similar images were first used to represent disease as well as pictures of the pain disease caused like little dogs biting your feet for Coutts for example gout cholera yellow fever. The way we picture these diseases changed once. We understood germs but when the so-called Spanish flu hit a nineteen. Eighteen Gardner says people thought it was spread through mosquitoes. And when you look at comics of the period you'll see mosquitoes and xenophobia. You'll often have on Schiavo dressed up in a of toreadors. Kate which is odd given that skiavo had little anything to do with the flu. And it's spread these days. You see corona virus depicted as the bad guy from the horror movie hellraiser whose head is covered with pins. Someone dressed up as him to pretend to be corona virus on a satirical news show in Egypt or not on the hand. Emmett haggem thought among many or as a deceptively cute animated Blah bouncing around on Stephen Colbert Online. Show tuning out the news. You know when you all you want as many people as possible in in. Have all these pieces of garbage? I was surprised how enduring the character was an case. Herwig is a nurse and a scholar of Medical Khartoum's she says during the HIV Democ of the nineteen eighties eight Scott pictured as a monster in the shadows. That's partly because at first we did not know what that virus look like. What's been remarkable about covert nineteen? Is that from the beginning? We had a visual of the pathogen. Which is why we picture it now. The way it really looks as globe with the crown of spikes making acute strikes a balance says in helping communicated message about public safety and to suggest that corona virus might be something will eventually be able to tackle and control Netto ulaby. Npr News this message comes from here and now sponsor indeed when it comes to hiring. You don't have time to waste. You need help getting to your shortlist of qualified candidates fast. That's why you need indeed dot Com post. A job in minutes set up screener questions then zero in on qualified candidates using an intuitive online dashboard. And when you need to hire fast accelerate your results with sponsored jobs new users can try for free at indeed dot com slash here now terms conditions and quality standards apply offer valid through March. Thirty first twenty twenty conservative media outlets including Fox News have come under heavy criticism. Not just for downplaying the threat of the corona virus early on but for playing up the anger at stay at home orders. Here's Fox host Janine Pirro. Speaking last week as protestors rallied in Michigan they WANNA keep us locked in our homes. They WANNA keep us away from churches and synagogues they WANNA make sure we don't go back to work they don't get it. The American spirit is too strong and Americans are not going to take it for more. We're joined by. Npr media correspondent. David Folkenflik. Hi David. Hey Jeremy so we just heard Fox News Janine. Pirro there on the stay. At Home Protests Info wars has gone even further. Here's Owen Schroeder host of the show war room this is the time where we have to reclaim our country. This is you're GONNA to have to make a sacrifice. Okay I mean it for some. It may be nothing for some maybe a sacrifice of just not wearing a mask outside others may have to take an arrest or get a fine but this is the battle. I mean if you don't make a sacrifice you have nothing David. How much has right wing media including info wars given these protests boost you know? These protests are not enormous. It's not like the tea party movement that you saw in two thousand ten which in which know conservative media and Fox significantly played a role as well but I think they are given some legitimacy as an expression of some sort of significant public sentiment that far outstrips what you're seeing in public opinion polls and what you're seeing in fact by the very fact that so much of America shut down. People are voting and protesting in some ways by staying at home some willingly some grudgingly but I think that you're seeing legitimacy given here. I think that you're seeing people being exposed to this as part of legitimate legitimate descent and debate in American society. And I think that if conservative media major outlet standby this you will start to see more of it. Bubble probably as an expression of partisan identity and support for the president from those who hold those police most strongly these outlets including Fox News have also been accused of downplaying the risk of the pandemic especially early on. Here's Jesse waters on Fox News on February episode of Fox and friends. I'm not afraid of the corona virus and no one else should be afraid either my hand. I I have people calling me from in the middle of the country. Their property surrounded by acres. They live in the middle of nowhere. And they're asking me about the corona virus. Are you crazy? What are they scare for? So that was in February. This is rush limbaugh radio just last. Friday people instinctively know now that however bad this is it isn't as bad as they all told us. Not One model has been even close to correct and everything. The medical and health experts have implemented or advised to be implemented have been based on these erroneous models. David your thoughts on this. Because a lot of people have blamed a conservative media for downplaying this to the point where their relatives have gotten sick and even died because they were listening. You see news articles where people have attested and made the contention that in digest as you say. That relatives believed in what Fox had to say are believed in what conservative media figures had to say or some more conservative public officials might say in seemingly dismissing the risk that this pandemic poses and then succumbed to the disease themselves. There's a study out that makes a claim. is not been peer reviewed but it's done by respected scholars. Some of whom are based at the University of Chicago that viewers of Sean Hannity were more likely to be exposed to the disease than viewers of Tucker Carlson who actually took it more seriously and earlier and I think that even if that study may have to be closely scrutinized for how it plays out? It has not yet been fully peer reviewed yet. I think there is notion of fact that people's beliefs are shaped by what they consumed swimming in these waters. If these are the conversations people are having saying well. We have to balance freedom and liberty and Descent is important and we shouldn't just blindly accept what public officials are saying to the point. Where you're dismissing then. What the overwhelming evidence seems to show. Which is that rush. Limbaugh slight that right. The models aren't perfect and have not been accurate or even always in quite the right neighborhood but the overall notion that it's being brought down by people not mingling but people not being in public seems absolutely borne out by everything we've seen and you know part of what the media does. The scrutinize fosters debate. But it also has to present the public with information. It needs to live their lives. David Fox News also doesn't appear to be backing down from embracing hydroxy chloroquine. Even as president trump has been talking about it less. This is Laura Ingraham just last night. Speaking with Jeff Collier a doctor and former Republican governor of Kansas physicians themselves are taking hydroxy chloroquine as a prophylactic against themselves coming down with Paris and perhaps getting seriously ill Dr Collier. They're prescribing it to themselves thirty happening. No it's already happening David. Just a few seconds here but that surprised that they're still doing that. What you're seeing is when a Fox's most outspoken figures responding to the networks own efforts to rein in it stars a little bit to be a little bit more responsible to acknowledge the risks as the public criticism is built up as even top official at Fox. This week tried to take steps to pull people back a bit. You're seeing some of their star saying no. You can't control us. You're going to pull us in. We're going to push back and try to repeat some of the Possibly damaging things we've said in the weeks that procedure this is. Npr media correspondent. David Folkenflik. Well one way to limit time in public is through technology using APPS to buy groceries or get things delivered but that can be a challenge for senior citizens joining us now by skype is Joseph Coughlin. Who's the director of the MIT age lab? Joe Welcome to here now. It's ready to Germany. Thank you well. I should start by saying this is not just a problem. For senior citizens. People of all ages can struggle with this but what are some of the reasons that older adults might not adopt new technologies like using smartphone APPs to order groceries or do banking online well my colleagues at the MIT Of studying the technology older adult interface. Four frankly two decades now and there's a number of reasons and some of them a lot of people may not like The mythology if you will. He's at older adults. Do not like technology. They're not willing to adopt or adapt to it well for some of us. That's true. Generally we find those people. Frankly were not high adopters when they were in their twenties and thirties regardless of what the technology was one of the greatest barriers however is that the technology itself is being designed by the very young for the very young. So what does that mean? How do you design something for the very young? If you think about it. One of the reasons why younger people pick up technology or at least we think they do. Faster is because remember to them. Everything is novel and so therefore it's worth a try they have. Shall we say no mental model away that they've ever done anything differently so they're willing to try with an older adult remember? They've got decades of finding ways of doing things. Frankly it worked out just fine. The Bar is higher in terms of my worth my time my hassle and my money to adopt your new technology will the other thing is that it can be difficult for a younger person to explain to the parent or the grandparent. How to use this new technology can be frustrating for everyone involved. What's a better way for seniors to learn how to use new technology? Actually if you think about it it's the way that even younger people are which is few of us. If you will have an intuitive understanding of technology we learned through Pierce. We look over the shoulder of France. What's that APP? How did you do that? Let me show. Older adults have a far smaller circle of you will. So what are the things we may want to think about his help? Older adults realize or frankly people any age generally speaking. You can't break it. Go ahead experiments. If it doesn't work shut it off and try it again. Secondly there are resources out there. I would direct many people to the AARP website. An organization called oats for older adults. Technology Services is well as frankly Germany. You and I know there's always a twelve year old kid on Youtube. His MOTHER'S BASEMENT. That knows how to write code or whatever it is or than you and I and then probably the other part is. Don't forget about friends and mentors whether they're older or younger. That's probably your biggest trusted source of people that will help you and understand you at the same time now. Part of the reason that some seniors may not want to use. Let's say a grocery delivery APP is that they may think it is risky to put credit card information in there. They don't trust it. What's behind that absolutely? In fact trust is a major issue although it is counterintuitive. Do you know that the younger you are the less trusting you are in other people and institutions as well which is Kinda funny given the fact that younger people are more likely to get a car with a stranger on an APP then older people for older adults that may have that fear and it is justified fraud? Theft is out there what I would suggest as they get one credit card that is dedicated just for that purpose it does not have that big a credit line and the brand of the card is known for being very defensive of your privacy and your protection so we're all learning a lot of new things in this crisis that will probably last for the long term. I for example have learned to make avocado toast. It's not very difficult but it's really delicious Do you think that senior citizens may learn new technologies because they have to right now and that will improve their lives in the long run? Exactly this gets over the Hump if you will of Ed. Do I really need it? It's a hassle. This actually has accelerated technology use and service adoption to the home in ways. We've never thought about before at the age level even entire program dedicated to managing the home as a service. Not just a place so whether it's telehealth food delivery entertainment social connection. This is becoming the new normal whether you're twenty or whether you're a hundred and twenty that is just Coughlin who's director of the MIT. Th Lab thank you so much for joining us and you know any other year tonight's NFL draft would be one of the biggest events on the calendar. Thousands of fans would show up in person to cheer or Boo as their team. Select the nation's top college football players. Of course this is not a normal year. Tonight's draft will be done remotely sort of like a huge zoom meeting with millions of dollars at stake for more. We're joined by Mike Pesca here and now sports analyst. He's also the host of the daily. Podcast the gist on slate dot com and Mike. How is this going to work well? They hope it's going to work. So the original idea for the draft before Corona virus hit was Las Vegas spectacular with the draftees riding in boats on the Bellagio Lake. This having kind of extravagant ridiculous there are going to be hundreds of different videos that have been shipped out by ESPN which will be broadcasting. The draft and people draftees the team executives will be filming themselves. That is what we the viewers will get to say. In TERMS OF TECHNOLOGY THEY'LL BE USING. It's not actually zoom zoom a little insecure or a lot insecure according to some media reports. They use a Microsoft application. Where I swear. Every day they send out three different notifications about just how secure this application is so when you get right down to it. The draft is an exercise in human resources and it seems like a TV extravaganza. But it doesn't have to be so I think the bare bones of telling college players who've I'll be playing for that will go smoothly. What we get to see might be a little glitch. E Yeah imagine though that the TV ratings are going to be huge because there is nothing else right so as a base at the WNBA TV ratings and the WNBA draft was an all but on looked on thing it more than doubled this year because there was some actual sports content. That wasn't a documentary That wasn't you know. Just replaying an old game so ESPN's ratings of course have fallen tremendously to say nothing of the NFL networks. They are salivating to have an actual piece of programming with some drama and uncertainty involved. It might not be a sport but it's close. Yeah you know my husband has ESPN Allen. Still like he's watching it as if some sort of game is just going to appear out of nowhere watching all those documentaries and stuff but you know the bigger question is they're even going to be an NFL season this fall for the players. Do get drafted tonight. Well the NFL thinks there is and the White House wants there to be an anthony. Fauci gave some interviews where he laid out plans where it could happen and the NFL also knows that other leagues have to go first so the MLB sees the truncated NBA season. Maybe they'll sequester or quarantine their players test. Them repeatedly play before empty stadiums. Maybe a third filled stadiums but of course a lot of that is predicated on what all of society wants which is enough and sufficient and accurate enough testing to make sure that their interactions don't lead to the spread of the virus. You know I mean a lot of folks are asking. The question will sports survive in general. I assume it will once we get back to normal. I mean it's just a part of the human condition to want to connect in this way. But what are your thoughts? I mean if you compare the signs of the business professional sports it seems big and the players get big salaries but it pales to other businesses yet. It's so often talked about. I think that we will want and find a way of our sports. Yeah Mike PESCA is here now. Sports analyst he also hosts the daily. Podcast the gist at slate. Dot Com. Thank you so much. You're welcome if you need a break. Maybe something to lift your spirits singer. Songwriter Jason Mraz is back with some new music. Follow the good said look for the good is the just-released reggae flavored title. Track on Marasmus album. Which will be coming out in June and Jason. Mraz is with me now on a very good quality microphone in his home studio in California. Jason Great to have you back. Thanks for having me on your program. It's a pleasure. I know that you as as all of us are joining us from home from your home studio. How'd you been holding up during this pandemic? You know I think during this pandemic we're all asked to master what's in front of us and for me. It's learning how to handle my career which is typically an outward expression out there in the world and I'm also learning how to master patience because that's what's in front of me here at home. Yeah I I love to stay creative. I love to stay active and now that I'm being You know we're all being asked to stay home. I'm learning how to master that patients in you know as well as some household chores and boxes and things that I've put off until quote unquote. Someday I think a month of Sundays has finally arrived right. Wouldn't you say master patients? What does that mean? How does that play out? Oh easily distracted myself with just more business more doing more more music more towards more projects and in this case we're really being asked to consume less and really reserve those resources for the essential workers. Busying myself driving around flying around creating things just taking from the economy. I'd be taking from my community and and I don't WanNa do that. What I have to say people listened to look for the good You can hear the sort of quintessential Jason mraz upbeat outlook. And I have to say one thing that I'm noticing and I'm lucky not to have gotten sick yet from Cova nineteen. I still have a job of income but I've noticed it. I'm having trouble sleeping Pretty regularly because probably the amount of time. I'm focused on the news which can be pretty depressing. But what about you? How are you able to stay positive and upbeat right now? Well I use music as my practice to help me look for the good. Music is an art of language and in that language. I get to choose the kinds of words that I'm bringing into action. You know those will eventually influence or affect my thoughts they'll affect my actions my attitudes and therefore my life experience can hover or dwell on the positive side. So that's where I choose to dwell even if I'm looking at the news and there's totally different frequencies happening on the news. I do my best to then transformed transmute translate even what I'm experiencing in the news into something good or to breathe life into it through music now. This song look for the good is being used as part of a campaign called food for heroes by the mayor's office in New York City. Which of course has been the epicenter at least so far in the US of the covered nineteen crisis. Tell us about that. This project the mayor of New York. His office has the fund the Mayor's Fund to advance New York City and within that find they've started the food for Heroes Fund which is going to provide upwards of tens of thousands. Hopefully thirty thousand fifty thousand hot meals a month to essential healthcare workers in personnel. And they're creating a PSA to basically raise awareness about this fund to bring dollars awareness to the healthcare workers so they can get some hot meals and we've lent our song to this campaign to run in the background just to amplify the message and hopefully raise the raise vibration and awareness around their efforts. It's a beautiful thing. Look for the good is not the only song on here. That has a reggae. Feel to it most all of them do. Let's listen to another one. This is called wise woman killed so much she does. She stays in touch with drew brees. She's out there with the planet but she keeps down by Jason Meraz. You have fully embraced reggae. Because last time we talked we talked about how you had a lot of different genres in your music this time. I think you've gone full on reggae. I have yeah. Thanks for noticing The Reagan era has one. That has always been a great medium to sing about issues. You care about and the reggae backbeat which is generously provided by producer. Michael Goldwasser from easy star all stars. He and I became friends a couple years ago and started writing songs and last year decided to make an album together where I've composed although the lyrics and messages to try to breathe life into an issue that I think are relevant and many that I care about on a day to day basis. Is it your that your home and studio have been modeled off of Bob? Marley's exactly I shouldn't say modelled architecturally but I did tour Bob's home back in two thousand four hundred trip to Kingston when I was there working with sly and Robbie on a project and I at that time was a touring musician living in an apartment in Los Angeles and I knew that between tours. I should be settling down. I should find a home and preferably a home like the home. I just saw at Bob Marley's house which was this beautiful home that allowed. He and his band is family to all live together while they were recording or rehearsing that little studio in the backyard that had enough room to grow gardens and fruit trees etc. So I bought a little house on the fringe of San Diego about five Acre place. That had a fruit trees and a and a little space little garage that could be easily converted into a studio and so that was about fifteen years ago. Never did I imagine fifteen years later I would actually be making my own reggae inspired by that event and my love of reggae since then and are you embraced by the reggae community by the longtime fans of Bob Marley. I hope so you know I I. We went about this project with the utmost respect for the rage this album features a lot of different reggae styles. Vintage reggae rock steady. A little bit of Dancehall a little bit of Scar But mostly classic reggae and some pretty modern reggae and hip hop funky influences as well but we really did our best to tribute genre in hopes of being a bridge for people who may have never listened to reggae before that they can then start looking at the genre and diving in a little bit deeper about where we may have been inspired by our sounds. I WANNA listen to one more song here from the new album. This is called gratitude girls and showed me have a day and not the ones you tear down indicate that is so hard to go on may be like five so let me just finally ask you a question that I sort of can ask anyone right now and I would ordinarily say. When do you think this locked down is going to be over but for you I will say? When do you think you're going to be able to perform another concert again? Wow that is a good question you know we. We were actually planning on launching a tour already selling tickets already. It was a fall tore. I've got team members saying well it's fifty fifty but it's it's really hard to believe that by September fifteen people are going to WanNa live together on a bus and travel from town to town day after day in meet hundreds of people in small spaces. I also think the industry in general has made a huge shift and we've learned how to operate from home so seeing that there's real benefits to the environment there's real benefits to the air quality the water quality etc. So I hope it's actually a slow and thoughtful reintegration so that we can be not only mindful of each other in our health but the continued health and restoration of the planet. Because we've we've clearly known we've been in a climate crisis for decades and this may actually be a a surprising unique and necessary way of starting to address that issue as well so I'm hoping it's a kind and gradual reintegration. Not something where we just all opened the doors and go right back at it and then we caused this problem again. That is grammy winning musician. Jason Mraz WHO's new album? Look for the good is out on June. Nineteenth single is available. Now Jason. Thank you so much for joining us in stay safe. Jeremy Thank you so much you too and for more information on food for Heroes. You can go to here now dot. Org and while many of us are eager to get back to a normal life. Scientists still very much urge us to maintain social distancing to slow the spread of the corona virus researchers at the University of Texas at Austin have been looking at Geo location data on cell phones to track social distancing measures throughout the country and their research shows. It's working joining us. Now is Lauren ansel Myers. She's a professor of biology and Statistics who leads. Ut's cove nineteen. Modeling consortium. Welcome thank you. It's great to be here. Yes so based on the data you've collected. What grade would you give the? Us overall when it comes to social distancing efforts right now I think we would give the US as a whole pretty good grade And we can see that in the shapes of the covert nineteen mortality curves that were projecting so many states across the United States and the United States as a whole it seems as if the the rate at which new US or occurring has declined and those curves are starting to dissipate. And that is because of the effectiveness of social distancing. People are really cutting off contacts with each other. In a way that is stopping the disease from spreading. Can you tell us a little bit more about your research? How cellphone data is being collected in used in this way to to find these findings? Sure so the the model that you're talking about is one in which we're trying to project three weeks into the future. How many people will die from Cova? Nineteen in every state in the country and the US and the way we make. These projections is By using a model of how How deaths will increase as a function of how much people are coming in contact with one another. So how do we figure out how people are coming in contact with one? Another what we can't see that directly but what we can see is the GEO location data from a company called safe graph and they collect Geo Location anonymous you location data. They aggregate it from tens of millions of cell phones from around the country. So it's really rich. Data and it's organization is providing this kind of data to researchers across the country To support better more data driven modeling of cove in Nineteen And what that data tell us is how much time people are spending at home. How often they're going to places like grocery stores and pharmacies and other public spaces where they might come in contact with each other and spread disease. And what we see from the data all across the country is that over the last month. The amount of time people spit spend at home the how often they make trips to these points of interest where they could come in contact with each other Time at home is increasing has increased dramatically and the rate at which people are gathering in. These places is decreased dramatically. And so that is that is direct input into our model and leads us to project the continuing decline in cove. Nineteen deaths For the next few weeks however we can only see what people are doing up till today right and so. We don't know how that behavioral change next week or next month. So that means we can only project about three weeks out What will what will happen with cope in nineteen deaths right? It's amazing what we can learn from our cell phone data and usage. It can be uplifting for some to hear that social distancing is working based on your findings but for others. They might hear this and actually think. Oh okay well. It's it's not as high as it could have been. There's a lot of people who may think. Well I can go back to normal life What do you say to that that the second is unfortunately the wrong way to interpret it? What what the results say is that. It has taken extensive social distancing in order for us to mitigate this terrible threat and our populations and so what this really says yes I mean. It's uplifting in the sense that we can make choices. We can make decisions that not only protect our own health but protect the health of everyone in our communities everyone our country but unfortunately we have to keep making that decision. We have to continue to take precautions. That either prevent contacts between people or really reduce the possibility of transmission. If we do have to come in contact with each other and if we relax that now if we if we go back to life as normal unfortunately this virus will start spreading at the rate that originally started spreading when it first arrived in our cities. You're you're reviewing the state as you mentioned state by state. Can you give us some examples of what you're seeing in terms of when a peak may come are you are are some areas closer than others Well we have an online website that shows the projections of our model. And so you can actually look at your own state and see where you are a lot of the big states that have experienced very substantial numbers of of of deaths in cases already many of them now look like they're they're have either. It's very likely they've passed their peak or will do so within the next two weeks so it's looking it's looking positive you know in many states around the country at this point but like. I said that that could change very easily. If People's behavior change is Lauren ansel Myers she leads the covert nineteen. Modeling Consortium at the University of Texas at Austin and we will have a link to her research at here and now dot Org Lauren. Thank you so much. Thank you and in taking a deeper look at Lauren's projections. We zoomed in Texas. Where she lives and the UT model shows that the probability is sixty four percent peak has already passed. The confidence jumps as the days. Go on in two weeks. Time of additional social distancing Texas. The model finds the probability at ninety four percent here now is a production of NPR and W. B. U. R. in association with the BBC World. Service I'm Tanya Moseley. I'm Jeremy Hobson. This is here and now.

United States Nashville Jeremy Hobson Jason Mraz David Fox NFL David Tennessee official David Folkenflik Mike Pesca Michigan Tanya Moseley Lauren ansel Myers Fox Mayor Cooper America Msnbc NPR
Look for the Good With Jason Mraz

Live Happy Now

21:10 min | 5 months ago

Look for the Good With Jason Mraz

"Hello and welcome to episode two hundred, sixty, five of live, happy now. This is follow Phelps and this week. We have a very special guest who has crafted the perfect message for this most unusual year. Since his first hit single the remedy in two thousand two, Jason Meraz has built his musical career by sharing positive uplifting music. This week he's releasing look for the good an album that encourages us to find hope, optimism and gratitude, despite the turmoil were experiencing right now. I sat down with the two time grammy winner to find out how this collection of songs came about what he learned in the process of writing and recording this album and what he hopes, everyone of us takes away from it. Jason Welcome to live happy now and thank you so much for coming on our show. Yeah my pleasure. Thanks for having me. This is a really exciting album to talk about and I'm very excited for our listeners to hear it because it's so timely really does feel like it was written specifically for even the last couple of months. Can you talk about how this whole project came about well on the topic of the songwriting? I, you're saying how it feels so timely. I felt that each. In life there will always be suffering, so we always need to reason to look for the good we always need. Music to hopefully help us cast the darkness away. And at least shift our attention, our perspective back to. Something brighter something more positive something that we can be grateful for so I feel like there's always work to be done in that field, and that's what I try to use my music or the power of good. It's a superpowers. I WANNA. Use It for the power good. I feel like it's we're really. Able to hear that power of good, maybe more than usual because of the current situation, but regardless of the current situation. I'm always trying to write songs that are on the good side of the language. I guess the whole concept of doing the reggae album was many years in the making I always wanted to make a reggae album, but it was obviously GonNa take a right musicianship. The right producer write songs and. About two years ago. I, met Michael Goldwasser. WHO's the producer of this new record? He did a remix for me. He's in the reggae world, and we just became friends, and let's make more music. And, as we started this email collaboration, you know this correspondence relationship. We just started making these songs that we thought were very I'm Lee. For our just call it. Let's call it twenty twenty. We didn't know what was going to happen at twenty twenty. Twenty. Two thousand none of this were expecting miss, but I did know it was going to be an election. Year and election years usually bring out. Brings out the debates and they're very heated. Which is good? It's a good thing because I think it helps us know ourselves, and it helps us here ourselves so. What are we craving? What's working? What's not working so on a debate year I wanted to make sure we released the music. That wouldn't necessarily influence debates, but just would remember us to be kind. Remember us to be. Human and treat the others on the other side of the aisle with dignity and respect regardless of our beliefs, because at the end of the day were all still just these very fragile. Human bodies made up of microorganisms, bacteria, and viruses and things that. Regardless of our political beliefs geographical borders. Let's remember we're human, so that's kind of what the songs were about. Let's just remember that we're human and we're fragile and we should be love for each other yet. What I'm about this is it just reminds you to take a breath, and as you said remember, that is a human and I love the song. My kind and it's such a wonderful job of saying like. Hey, we are all one. That really is a kind of and that we need right now. and. It's just that slate remembering that we're all one you know, and right now with this microorganism virus. That's going around forcing us to be in our homes. Certainly reminds us that we as humans are one, and we are only one species here that if we're not careful, the earth will continue to transform and could potentially do without us, so how precious our material things! How precious our our? Heated debates when it really comes down to the preciousness of human life. Do our material things in our rate of consumption. Does it really matter that much so? It's interesting that we could to slow down right now and feel extra human, but I feel like there's always. Music to give comfort. That's my job is to try to create some, and it's obviously a job. You do very well and that you love, and when I really I love the reggae influence on this and I always feel like reggae is such a great carrier for positivity. Anyway in so, can you talk about why you wanted on that particular set of songs? You mentioned that you had always talked about doing it. How did this become the right fit? I didn't know it was going to be the right fit. It really began his experiment. It was something I wanted to make as a live performer whenever I would. Play a reggae song or I would take convert in an older song of to a reggae style or fashion. I would get a different sensation from it as a performer, and then I would notice, the audience would also connect to it in a different way, so there's something really there's something magical about reggae that causes people to dance and to connect so of explore this more so I made a bunch of songs with Michael Goldwasser as an experiment to see what it would feel like to have A. Of reggae songs and what I found was that in this genre with dance driven. I didn't expect that even songs that I wrote on Guitar Piano. That were quite mellow. They became these dance songs through the power of REGGAE. And dance is is kind of a way to get out of your head and kind of get back to your heart. Get Out of your body a little bit. And as a performer, you pair that with some positive lyric EUCHRE that dance with. And it feels like church in a way and so I'm I'm able to sing a positive message in, but I'm also able to dance on the fringe of ideas that are not as easily sung in traditional poppies. Like the song, my kind for example. which definitely goes into the Scott beat the wreckage on allows me to breathe life, not only into love positivist, but into I think transformation or messaging or The kind of messaging that breathes life into an ever changing world and I've not been able to do that necessarily in the pop category as easily, that makes perfect sense. I really think it has to do with that backbeat in the background music that. When we listen to Reggae we're getting either love, we're getting either spirit or you need some kind of revolution. Of changes occurring. And I feel that's happening right now. You know we need love a revolution as having a biological revolution is happening on this planet, where as humans are shifting our how we're looking at the planet suddenly. And looking at humans as a species more so than just a big political revolution, which is also happening I. Believe Yeah, degree I would say so. Many things got real this year where. Oh, we've got time. We play around with the planet and it's good gotta live for. And I. Think there are a lot of messages that came home to us. This year I like that. Things got real for sure will for you like you have always been. Your music has always been so positive and uplifting, and in that sense, you've always kind of swum upstream from the rest of the industry, because positively isn't necessarily what we get out of. What's playing on the radio? So why has that always been important to you? It starts with the love of performing in love of songwriting like I love singing, and so I became a songwriter because I love to sing, and so if I sit down at an instrument to sing I, just feel joy, so it seems like what should be coming out of my mouth. Is something joyous, not something sad and depressing, and then if I have the luxury of someone's year. And if they're giving me their time in listening I, want to share with them. My Joy, not my sadness. I, always found myself wanting to share joy and I also think writing a happy song is not easy. It requires the finesse, and it requires an understanding of the dark side so. Usually I sit down at a piano to celebrate joy, because life has got dark and out of balance. Aren't they okay? I gotta get to my instruments because that's where joy lives. That's where a bigger spirit in the dwells. So I've just for some reason, joy songs just work better for me. They keep me going. I love that, so your does your positively come to you naturally because on the show a lot, we talk about our negativity bias, and we all have different happiness set point, and some people have to work to think positive, and it seems like maybe you lean that way anyway. Well I do but I have to work at it because I get it your music practice. Get it through some version of creativity. And I do feel like trust me I get! Periods long periods of just melancholy and. Sadness so I will shift music and I will work on music or crafting something creative. Until that melancholy blows over? Rather than. Just sit with the melancholy and start adding extra weight to it. In rather than sitting melancholy and say I am sad. I am no good. All I'm doing is creating. More and more identity around that melancholy, so I work at it I shift I. Go to music. I go to crafting and I just I. write go to journaling. I go to poetry. Until I feel that transformation in that transfers goes. I am a powerful creator. I am worthy I am new. I am renewed. And, all of that comes through the creative process so i. see on the page reflected back to me. Something beautiful are here on the piano. Something coming out beautiful. And it just resets me and I. It's almost like brain doesn't have time to the melancholy more because I don't believe in anymore. That's perfect. Yeah, at what point did you realize? This was the album that needed to be released? Because it sounds like in the beginning, you were just dial. Let's pass some songs back and forth in kind of playing around with it I feel like each song on the record the answer to that question. Is it starts with a handful of songs. Search one song like that's pretty good. Try another one allow. That's pretty good. That's pretty good, and then you get to a point where maybe two? Six seven eight songs, Nick wile away more work and got ten song. That's enough for an album, and then you get to Ted and you realize that only eight of them are good. Okay, a few more songs and so I just kept feeding it in I don't know I've I like making songs in collection so songwriting itself is, but then the next level of trying to categorize those songs, and how they lived together curated into a collection of songs becomes the next part of that scrapbook or that presentation. So. For me, the process is just about loving the music, and at some point I shift from the singular song to a larger body of work. Yeah, because this became almost like a positively concept album you know or A they tied together. They're not necessarily you know consecutive, but everything ties together so well. Yeah, thanks, you know what I feel like. When I make an album, it's the same effort every time, but obviously the year is going to be different. You're my life and who I am in that year and the experiences I've had whatever books I've read. Whatever relationships I'm in our how each ships going. All of those things are going to feed. The creative process and be that out, but. The structure of how I write music, and our right down. My feeling is the same. So what's going to change are those influences. That's outside. Life influences so in trying to write a cohesive album that takes you on a journey that is informative, entertaining, entertaining person, foremost sounds beautiful sounds accessible in relatable, so you'd WanNa, sing to it. All of those things I'm trying to factor in every time, and I feel like because I've made six albums. I'm getting a little better at that process, but what I'm trying to say is I feel like I'm making the same album over and over and over again. But what changes is my perspective on life? Or my age motivations, but always trying to put together hopefully well curated collection of songs that are diverse, but still share some common message in between this album, and my first album is twenty years, and my motivations are way different back in my early years, I'm trying to get the girl I'm trying to be clever. There's a lot more ego involved. It's nice to be at this side of those years. and. Try to think how I can use my superpowers for good, not just serve my ego, not just trying to get the girl. But shines brighter light on many. What I've been up to, and with look for the good at the lead, single swells namely album we're in the writing process. Did that come from? That was actually titled at Michael Goldwasser submitted. Michael was the producer of this album. And he had heard his rabbi. Sermon is look for the good, and you will see the good, so if you go out in the world looking for it, you'll find it same as bad news. Look for the bad and you'll find the bad. It's easy to find so look for the good, and you'll find the good in. So that was a title. He submitted to this project when he sent me an instrumental idea musical idea to work on that was the title and it bit, and all I had to do is sit down and. Expound upon that idea. Which is what I love to do. It's just another version of gratitude when you're asked to look for the good. When you're asked to say, thank you, Hey, what do you think before the first thing we do is? We saw scanning either a memories or our environment for something good because we want to say, thank you for that thing. Or that person that experience in our life. So, look for the good is a song of gratitude and originated from Michael His rabbi. That's excellent, and it's a great leadoff is great way to introduce yourself to this whole collection? Another song that I wanted to talk to you about is you, do you? So that's a great tune I love how it celebrates individuality and. When people listen to that, what do you hope that they here? I joy, always joy freedom enjoy those are my two favorite things, freedom enjoy and. Their favorite, because I've been given those things in life through my parents through the resources through my public school. Just the system was designed for kid like me to have freedom of joy in, so it's been my work in my adult life to make sure others in every other human being also gets to experience freedom. Enjoy, and you do is a song that sort of practices that exercises that that says. Let us all. Be Free to be ourselves, and let's be joyous and let us celebrate each other for each other. Freedoms because we're all going to have a different version of what that feels like. And wrong have different versions of joy. You know there's a lot of different ice cream flavors in pros and food section. And everybody wants something different and. Freedom and joy. That's what I hope people get out of you, do you? That's what I get out of it. Yeah, because I kind of feel like that should be piped into well everywhere right now because we've got so many people trying to say well, you're doing it wrong, or you should be doing this and when I listened to that song. It's like wow, that could be our theme song for this summer. That would be awesome. When I. Sit on a train or subway, and you're just packed with a bunch of people in there. One of my favorite things to do is try to imagine everybody superpower because you just never know who anybody is. You don't know if they're an inventor enough. There are a doctor. You don't know if they're an amazing painter or the most famous poet in the world. But in a train, car or subway, it's just quiet and it's just a bunch of strangers. Your brain could easily go into dark places like Oh that person wants to steal my wallet or that person probably has a cold or you just looking for bad things, right? I enjoy playing the other way and. Trying to imagine the victories in those people's lives. A, beautiful way to approach it. Yeah, and then it also becomes a less scary place. It becomes more of a place where I'm like. Wow, wish that I would kind of come talk to me because I suspect that. They can read my mind or something. I don't know but yeah. It's a fun way to use your imagination. and. I really do look forward to people being able to hear the album when this airs its just a couple of days away from your album release, so we're excited about that, and before we let you go, you know your wish to make the world. A better place certainly doesn't end with your music. So can you tell us a little bit about your foundation? Yes Jason Mraz Foundation something I started back in twenty eleven and. Three years ago I. Really kicked it into year by well twenty seven. We super served many different fields and three years ago. We refocused it to focus specifically on inclusive arts, education and advance equality. And that. Similar to programs that I came up to as a kid. Arts education is just such a great medium for collaboration, and and when you add inclusivity to that arts education, you're not only getting a great arts training, but you're getting compassion, empathy and acceptance. You're learning how to. You basically learning how to sit on that subway or train car and see the good in everybody basically is what inclusive arts education does. And for the purpose of the advancement of equality, because as I said earlier I came up through. Great Public School that made it easy for me to experience freedom, so the Jason's foundation is helping to breathe life into programs that exist as well it create new programs that can hopefully also create experiences of freedom enjoy for young people who are pursuing the arts, so everything from dancers visual artists poets to songwriters singers. You name it. We're out there trying to help them. Get a hand up in the world to experience their freedom joy. That is fantastic well. Thank you for all that you're doing. You're really a lot of people say they WANNA make the world a better place, and you are so actively pursuing that in many ways, and we appreciate you sharing that with us. Thank you my pleasure to share. That was Jason Morass talking about his new album. Look for the good which drops this week. If you'd like to learn more about where to this album or learn more about Jason and his foundation just visit us at live. Happy now, DOT COM and follow the links. And a reminder bring a little bit of happiness to your work day every day with live, happy daily happiness briefing. visit our website for a link to enable this as a skill. Then start your morning by saying Alexa. Give me my live happy daily happiness briefing. That's all we have time today. We'll meet you back here again next week for all new episode, and until then this is Paula Phelps reminding you to make every day a happy one.

Michael Goldwasser producer Jason Paula Phelps Jason Meraz twenty twenty Alexa Jason Mraz Jason Morass Great Public School Scott DOT COM Nick wile Michael His Ted Michael twenty years Three years three years
Songwriter Peter Hollens | Working with Violinist Lindsey Sterling | How One Hit-Writing Songwriter is Navigating the Coronavirus Economy

Thrivetime Show | Business School without the BS

38:32 min | 3 months ago

Songwriter Peter Hollens | Working with Violinist Lindsey Sterling | How One Hit-Writing Songwriter is Navigating the Coronavirus Economy

"On today's show. We interviewed a Song writer Peter Hollins Peter Hollands is a singer songwriter who shares what it's like to write songs with David Archie let Bryant Wilson from the Beach Boys Chasing Morass. And Windy stirling he explains today show why is a song writer? You need to own your masters to get paid he explains how he's navigating the Kuroda virus economy and what gear you need to succeed in this digital marketing and music universe. WanNa know what gear you need to succeed listen in on today's show interview with Peter Home for a quick sample of what Peter Hollands brings to the table was to this track called Sky Rim featuring Lindsay stir. Everything, you here on this track was created by one voice one Violin Lindsey stirling. Peter Halt Get ready to enter the drive time show. Talk. Battle. Now, on the top systems to give what we got. The books Hopperton the books sees tickets wisdom. At the father of. That's why I'm a dive. So if you see my kids, please tell them. See. Your Now to what? Only, put down your Bryant Year. Our guest is your today's guest elaborate on on. The huge name born in Winston Jason. mraz gladys. Knight. Lindsey stirling and he's never done an interview where he's been interviewed by a man using riot gear and a megaphone. Welcome. To The Show, how are you sir? Oh Man. Where are you located? Bro. Where are you at right now? I am hiding out in the cold or sack, and Eugene, Oregon Sir beautiful and when you're not hiding out in a in a cul de sac and Eugene Oregon, what are you doing? How do you pay your bills? What? What's your job? my job is to run a digital media company, but my product is music that I distribute across the The World Wide Web was videos. So how does a man like you get impacted by a shutdown of our American economy because really what we're doing again not this is not a political statement. This is just a fact. For the first time, Paul in American history and I can recall. All Americans have one boss or one person that writes them a check. The government, the federal government, and so every personnel regardless of whether you're Republican or Democrat, we are all this is our one week. Experiment. With communism. At this is their theme song by the way this is. So, whether you believe the coronavirus is really bad. Or Not really bad I mean whether you've realized that the. Doctor. Deborah burks has just came out and said that the projections and the predictions were off. And that two point two million? Americans. Are Not at risk of dying but. Eighty, eight thousand. And five hundred thousand Brits are not at risk, but now twenty thousand are whether you like it or not whether you agree with it or not. It is the economy that we're all navigating and so peter how does this impact you to be? How does this coronavirus economy shutdown impact you? Right, well, I. Am you know and falling all the the regulations that the state of Oregon put forward. So all my staff are working remotely I thankfully and working in a second house that is just now occupied by just myself right now I was looking up to have a another house in town. So I moved all my studio stuff there that I'm not working. By myself but everyone's working remotely Thankfully, I've built a business that's built upon residual revenue. So I've been able to keep paying off my own employees full-time during this, and we're just working on slack and working through platforms like free, which is Great. video editing one and just sending files back and forth. So we're we're able to stay on top of things and. Make videos like The one I came out with earlier about focusing on hygiene and such during this This this fun reality that were currently in right now for a week or or whatever you just mentioned. but yeah, I think thankfully, not too bad not too bad it'll be more obvious in a few months all music is trails quarterly because all of our revenue comes from platforms The predominant amount of my revenue so I don't get to really see what's going on at the exact moment it's happening until later and. Because people are home, they are streaming and listening to music more. So it could theoretically be a be a positive but right now you know it's difficult from a productivity point and a communication standpoint should not be working directly with you know my editors and my executive producer but you know we're learning. So just trying to navigate what does that video editing tool that you mentioned again Yeah frame I o it. It is a phenomenal on tool that we have been actually using since they were in Beta it allows us to I guess you could say it's kind of like a dropbox mixed with like a visual to over you to draw on it and and do things in real time frame by frame. It's really great. It's definitely worth trying out we've been using it for I think. God, maybe three years now. but allows collaboration I've worked with artists even from like Turkey. That I've never even been in the same room with but then we'll release content where it looks like we are because you know thanks to blue screen green meeting create stuff. Now you have worked on. Projects with some of my favorites, I mean Jason Mraz that right there Paul you know how tough I really win this occurred of Economy I. Don't want to print out or give out too many make. To dilute deluded if you give out too many mega points, he's had two so far. So you work with Jason Mraz, that's. Always say you get a make a point if you work with Jason Mraz and I, always tell us if you've ever worked with Gladys Knight in Lindsey Stirling and Brian. Wilson you get an additional three point. So I, know you're excited about this Peter because these are redeemable in. To the bank. We into the bank in the afterlife upstairs, there's new new new. But Lindsey Stirling. What did you do with Lindsey Stirling? Well, what would project? Did you work on with with Lindsay? Oh. Gosh Lindsey stirling I think might be the most The most powerful story in my in my crater history she she is the first critter that I truly collaborated with that turn my entire mind around from looking at my peers as competitors to looking at my peers as collaborators and peers. She she treated me as an equal she wanted to see me succeed She taught me so much We worked on a song originally, that was the theme song for the most popular videogame about a decade ago called sky, Rim and since then that video on both of our houses somewhere north of like eighty or ninety million. What does? Oh, it's it's it's the sky rim main theme. It's like in a made up language. It's like Goba King Dove. Aquino. Look what do I need to type into Google to find or youtube, but I need to find a to define it? Yeah. You could type in Sky Rim S. K.. Y. R. I M. Skyer in seen and. Cool, little coast play show up and I'm the. Can you. Can. You explain what what she does because some people out there and go I think I've heard the name I, mean I don't want to attempt to describe what she does because it's so phenomenal that the words coming out of my mouth or not GonNa, do it justice explain what Lindsey Stirling does? Yeah Yeah Lindsey stirling by herself created her own genre she basically. took classical pedagogy on on on her instrument, the Violin, and then she mix it with you electric music and she basically was able to create her own niche of music and she mixes it live with phenomenal dancing and and very powerful uplifting positive you know life lesson it blows my mind. It did. It's music that almost like makes you. Cry. Because, you're so moved no matter what mood you're in. Yes amen to that. It is crazy. I would agree. And it's only matched by by her as a human she she I mean I i. I could very like very easily say that I wouldn't be making a living do managing now if it wasn't for Lindsey now that's that's for sure you've worked with Brian Wilson and for people who are not from with Brian Wilson t cheer with us to educate our listeners who is Brian Wilson and why star listeners care. Oh my gosh. I think you could say Brian. Wilson. Was The godfather of of. Pop. Music to some extent he he's just a musical genius. Brian Wilson is the beach boys to me personally grew up listening to the beach with my father He was definitely somebody that I looked up to as Know. Gosh. I mean, just one of those guys that are untouchable and then We were able to collaborate on an original song and and and release that both on my album and on on on his last one that he released in. That was really really really cool. Really really cool. I. Don't know how you can adequately describe Brian Wilson he wilson he's he's more unique than any other human. I've ever met personally he the movie about his life. Have you seen the movie about Brian? Wilson's life I have I have I he went a personal hell. I mean that guy. Unbelievable Songwriter went through a personal hell that movie it's. A phenomenal movie encourage everybody to check out that movie because it'll. It'll change the way that you think how how has he impacted you like how was the time with him how that impacted you the way you produce music now? I mean I would say that his his laundry list of music has taught me a lot about harmony in general I I I am in no way shape or form even remotely on. Even the same planet as him as a songwriter, I mean a I mean he's he's more to me as somebody that I just admire as as just like a a a talented musician savant I don't know how you describe him meeting him in person was like surreal and and strange, and like the movie can kind of get you ready for it but he's just very. I don't know he's just Brian Man I was. Yeah, it was interesting we got to. We got to shoot a music video together. Unfortunately, I couldn't get released for whatever whatever reasons but it was a it was an amazing day that I got to spend with him in La when we thought that it to Youtube. Youtube Space But yeah, it was phenomenal when you are riding with an artist somebody like Jason Mraz. Somebody like Lindsey stirling like a Brian Wilson what are you doing like? What does the process look like the new show Song Land is produced by a man that I know very well, Ryan header went to college with Ryan. Ryan's saying at. Our wedding. I've known him very well. So what what's the process like of songwriting? Sure? Yeah. So I'm GonNa Throw Your Curve Ball. I can't song right worth a darn for real cannot. Being in the room with people who are phenomenal and let's do that. One mega point. But you get another makeup point for being honest, which is a rare thing in America today. So you get back. There you go. yes. So when I get to collaborate with people, my workflow is very unique in that I create these extraordinarily lush acapella arrangement. So what I will usually do is take the the song of the IP. Or the the base basic concept idea of my collaborators, and then I will then take that and then put my own acapella spin on it. Where I get to introduce you know hundreds of vocal layers So like when I was working with Lindsey, I would have her record specific lines that I would then mix into the just the just the opposite voice and then rearranged with with my team I mean. Quite. Honestly, I am nowhere near Yeah I'm just not a songwriter have great ideas and I like to create things. But I would say, I'm much more of like an entrepreneur that went to school and got an opera degree that can sing well but I create conflict because I like Dorky cappella music and it's just my niece I. I I think I have some years to go before I can. Open up my my heart myself to the world to to really write original music that I have and they're sitting on my computer but I haven't really seen yet. 'cause I I think I. Need to grow a little bit more before I can get there. What do you? What do you call yourself? If you're not if you're not a song writer, what do you call yourself? you know what I think. I think I'm a I'm musician AN ENTREPRENEUR I. I I I advise Silicon Valley startups I I advise my my peers I have a second education company that I'm trying to help promote. Best Practices for my fellow creators because I feel like I've learned and failed so much during the last ten years of doing this job both in. Being silly enough to sign a record deal and learning what comes with that, and what that really really really means to just basic practices of how to reverse engineer what's out there to be able to find your own voice in create your own career by utilizing the Internet for really what it is, which is just A. You know basically a free. Worldwide Marketing Device So. Yeah. I mean I. I'm a musician I went to school take all those classes but I, I'm not a I'm not a legitimate quote unquote. Like a normal. What assume how do we interviewed Ross goal and on the show we've interviewed Ross Golan we viewed. A Lot. We've actually had a fairly decent amount of of songwriters on the show. In every time we interview you guys. People always think that Emily Warren. Who's the song writer for the chain smokers they always think that she's just making bank because the song let me down by the chain smokers is playing all day every day. So they assume man she's making bank. Now please explain to me when somebody streams on spotify right? So I hit play cure I stream the song I played a song. It was a great song boom. How do you get paid? Okay, I'm going to do this to the best my building. Ability I'm not a lawyer but here it goes if you are the owner of. The, the piece of music itself right the Ip for the composition You get a fraction of the money that you would. If you were the artists one hundred percent owner of the song itself So so when I when I I built my entire career basically creating music off of other people's compositions. So I'm cover artist. Ninety percent of the time you know I've done lots of original domains. My, my revenue that comes through. Let's say you're exact example spotify for instance, actually really quite good because I own my masters I don't I don't I don't have a contract any longer with Sony. I owned my masters now. So the revenue that I get every month on spotify is not only very nice but it also is growing month over month that at a double percentage point clip I think the Lord. But there's there's been multiple multiple years where spotify has been and many other Amazon itunes everybody has been thrown through the ringer because. Artists who don't own their don't own their own masters because they are dealing with a label or they're dealing with a publisher owns their own copyright. They are not seeing what's going on because they have I would say gosh how do I say this without really getting in trouble? So it's like you took money from the mafia, but then the Mafia. Doesn't allow you to. Go. you have no sense of how much money's coming in and you have no sense of how much money you're paying back as they are the the accountants as well. So. So in essence I feel very bad for older artists who've came from time period where there was so much money because CDs purchased for twenty dollars a pop you had to buy everything all together just to get the ones that you loved and you had all these. Songs that didn't do very well decide but there was a lot of money to go around and now there's less so although it is growing and we are going to get back to where we were. The golden era of music is still coming I really truly believe that. But if you don't own your masters, you are in trouble and as a songwriter I still think right now that to. Be, a a a song writer as a profession and have nothing else almost almost impossible. Just due to the fact of how the economy is set up. 'cause most songwriters signed with publishers right and they get these huge huge I personally don't know I'm not GonNa say that day but they they get You know they're like, here's a hundred, thousand dollar or seventy, five, thousand or fifty thousand. was called when you get your advance allowance your advanced right but then they just don't get back. But the problem is the problem is they don't. They don't get to do their own accounting it's not like you're paying right? You're not. You're not paying Sony your or Universal Warner Back Yourself. So you don't know that there's no transparency. It's Kinda like. You. Can build a back end. You can build a back end in like three months with two engineers. That's beautiful to everyone be able to see what's going on. But the Blackbox Syndrome is real and they don't show the transparency be because well, it makes the most sense because that's how they make. I mean I don't I don't. It's Kinda like indentured servant hood back in the day after slavery ended a lot of African Americans were freed and they said you can you can leave. In fact, you could rent the land from us. You can do your own thing and these people who been farmers their whole life. They said, you know what? I? Think we're GONNA hang out and just rent land from you said cool. But since you guys don't know how to do math. We're GONNA help you with that and no matter how hard they worked. They never actually got ahead and that's the a little bit of the craziness out there. So it's it's interesting interesting. Now Paul we have time for three rapid fire questions for Peter here. But can I call you a song writer what I need to call you? What's the official title? I you know what you can just call me. A A. Digital, digital. Musician. I don't tell. Me Whatever you want definitely written songs out the best why I am going to okay. So I have I. Have Two questions Paul beat him up with one here question number one coming in hot your song out there this song about epic hand washing song. What is this song epic hand Washing Song how can people find it? What are they need to search for on Youtube defined it Yeah, you go onto youtube you type in epic hand washing parody type in epic hand washing. Song it will come up and it will teach you how to adequately Wash your hands while you laugh. And honestly all the proceeds go to a charitable organization. So that's a that's a plus. Are you in this video? I am all over this video I am there to make you laugh that is my goal and and teach you proper hand washing techniques. Of course, oh. Beautiful. I I'm going to click it right now. Oh well that right? That's just a folks that's just a little teaser of the snack pack of epic hand washing their Paul. What is your question you'd have here for Peter Hall and Jerry you're an accountant Paul Hood CPA's has done very well you grew up with nothing you built it into something. What question do you have Peter? The question I have Peter is, is you seem like a very unique person you know most people fit into a category of left brain right brain creative versus business, and you've seen to harnessed both sides, the creative side but yet you've you've been very successful. And what do you think you know how did you bridge that gap that so many people struggle with? I I grew up falling in love with computers. I. I also have this weird thing inside me when when when, when, when something is wrong when you get treated wrong that I need to make it right or I need to fix it and so when I followed the trajectory of an artist and I did all the things that I was supposed to in regards to like signing with a company that said they were GonNa pay me and I got. And I ran into barriers the barriers that have always existing music industry I was like this is not right. I'm going to fix this, I'm gonNA. Do it myself and? I started slowly teaching myself. I taught myself engineering video editing I taught myself how to run a business and now I have you know eight full time employees and two different companies that we're trying to. I had to I had to, I, I love computers I love technology. Love Music and I had this thing like the thing I'm like that's wrong. I have to fix this and so that's one of the reasons why I'm so outspoken whether or not pisses people off or whether or not my own peers like me giving them advice I just do it anyway because I made mistakes I want them not to make the mistake and I want to help people and so Yeah I don't know use weird. You sound a lot like Ross Golan you sound a lot like Roscoe. Ross has really been fighting hard to make sure songwriters get paid. You sound like him a little bit. I mean I you know what? I I I'm looking him up because I hadn't ever oh to. The bubble but now I know He's your guy he's your guy. You know, Ross, we were actually exactly the same age or one month apart yeah. In the stuff that Ross is doing I mean Ross. Just for listeners out there that are not aware of this. He works to pass the Music Modernization Act, which is basically the leading voice. It's ideas for songwriters is to make sure that you guys get paid for your music and also making sure that songwriters can now win album of the year at the grammys because before you can write a great out win the awards. So I know that you`re What what you're saying right now sounds you should reach out to Ross. You guys have become fast friends. Now my final question, my final question for you. A lot of listeners right now who are marooned in their parents basement in their own basement in their shed and they're tiny home and they're going I want to know what gear I need to get going. You know some talented people. So I'm GonNa ask you I'm going to start with the computer. Tell me what kind of computer our listeners need right now to get what kind of Mac do we need just to get in the game? Just to get in the game, I think Nice refurbish Mac from the last seven years can. Pretty much run bro the essential. I i. mean honestly I, I think even just macbooks books would be would be fine I like I i. think here the Austin is we have like twelve computers and all of them are refurbished except for one and I only had to buy the new because. The new ridiculous computer you have to buy not refurbished but I I I really trust refurbish Max you get him for for twenty thirty, forty percent off I love the fact that they come with Become with garage band, which is a very, very adequate audio Yup workstation, and if you're able to figure out a garage band, you'll be able to figure out logic, which is the recommendation I have. If you start now I'm stuck in pro tools personally. So you're saying you're starting now logic is the program or garage band start with garage band than use logic. Get a Mac book. What kind condenser microphone what kind of microphone do we need sound good. When you did your son what kind of Mount Mike did you use for your vocals? So originally on on my first album that I recorded of other people. I had I had just road nc one as which is a very inexpensive Australian Mike and road makes very nice. Pro Consumer Products They're very quiet. So the signal chain is very low do really really good job on male and female vocals and I'm a vocalist and that's what I love. The also do really good job on Acoustic Guitar If you are in the if you do have money I recommend tell US Dunkin microphones. They are my favorite I have two that I've used. Last eight years I'm in love with them television fifty one are you making stuff? Hunkin telephone can? What's your? Telephone him. I, think in my opinion are the best to like phone manufacturers on the planet but telephone is a really nice German company. They've made great Mike's for a very long time. One microphone by the way, it's about two hundred and twenty nine dollars. How much is the? Microphone. Oh yes. The the microphones I am using our what I would call my tax write offs. So they are seven, eight, nine, thousand dollars, but hey. I have to buy them for tax purposes at the end of the year time. So I I do splurge on on Mike what kind of headphones but I do have. What are they I'm sorry. Your good. My favorite my favorite under hundred dollar headphones are the what are those Ak Geez I'll come on. Run over hit kind of what kind of headphones are the most hyped up over expensive they're not actually great microphones are you going? Don't don't shell all that money out for that thing that thing just no come on. You know what? Those those are the those monsters, What Are Those Aka we always have like the six Ak we. Catering Forty K. to forty, two, forty got it got the K. K. to forties and those are under a hundred bucks. Yeah, you can get them for seventy nine dollars usually at least once or twice a year. Again I really recommend buying a used gear because you can get into very cheap when you're starting out. You don't need to have the newest anything when you're first starting, you just need to start creating and failing. So you can find your sound and find what you like, what kind of wins windscreen who need to buy. For the microphone. Your Mom's pantyhose just kidding. Just kidding Kinda. Just, call you have. To make just because they're so. They're so So, durable I have to blue I don't even know what these are called. You know what? If I was prepared. Okay. How much are these things I mean we're talking about hundreds of dollars or is there a certain brand windscreen? No nineteen twenty nine dollars you can get him on Amazon okay. Okay. Is there a certain brand you prefer? I really like the blue microphones here. I look. You know or or particular brand of pantyhose either way I mean it's IT'S A. Similar. Our listeners we're going to be. Microphones pop universal windscreen has gotten way more expensive than when I bought mine. So they must be doing well if they can do that. On The branch called blue microphone. Good microphones, pop universal windscreen, pop, universal windows we win but it also it's also it's also basically lasted for seven years of me torturing two of them. So at least something that's beautiful. Any other here we need just basic gear anybody out there to encourage anybody out to these digital artists that maybe just will know what gear they need. Honestly. I think in order to become a crater they need to start creating even if that means that they're they're just borrowing somebody else's phone because I mean Gosh, our our phones now can create such phenomenal. Audio and video screens. I. Even have a tiny little mike the. Apogee sent me that I just plug into my iphone and I've even recorded a song off of it. Like this tiny little apogee when it's just GonNa Hey, what? What's the use at the frame dot IO is a software you're using right now to communicate with your team digitally. Is there any other songs? Because an online platform, it's it's Yeah. If you type in www dot frame dot I o. actually if you just type it in framed, i. Oh, got it. It's phenomenal. It's saved her but so much and it's it's up to our productivity immensely especially for collaboration Everything about it I've been just enthralled with and they've been really really really good to work with on the support side wouldn't have a problem. I know that they've already literally updated their platforms like for a few little things for things sent them and annoyed them about. So just a great company really easy to work with Yeah. It's anything that saves time I mean that is just the best. Peter you are an inspiration and a guy who? Is I've heard now always good for good conversations I'd love to have you on the show again, but our listeners out there very actionable. They want to check out they want to learn more about you. What's the best place to learn more about you? Absolutely I recommend people going to my youtube channel. That's where all my content is stored. You can't see everything from video game stuff to Lord of the Rings to Hymns to Christmas music, and even some silly parodies trying to get you to wash your hands. So Peter, Hollins on Youtube and if you for whatever reason you like it, all my other things go off from there. So and hey, real quick if you get a chance to eat a lot of stuff on your schedule, but you can tell. Lindsey stirling good freaking job. I. Just my mind is blown by her I. don't even understand I. I watch her perform. I don't even understand what's going on I. Get it. I have to like draw Diagram Watch it twice make myself a Haiku listened to it backwards and forward it's just great. I mean you just just an unbelievable artist and I think it's awesome youtube team up that's great. Oh, yeah we've done four songs actually just Texas is price and and instead you wouldn't stop singing her praises so. She's a great America. It's a one of my. One of my life goals is to interview that woman. So if you could make that happen I will give you a holy cow. God and that goes well, and because people are stuck at home right now, we've always had about half million listeners but now that number's way going up. So if we can interfere in the in the future we'd love to. I will let Edina her manager. No for Hey will you take care of my friend? Thank you so much for being on today's show and thrive nation checkout Peter Hollands on Youtube. If you care about your family fight through the carpal tunnel fight through the arthritic thumbs and use your smart device to go to Peter Hollands on you tube. Peter Hollins have a great day. You take care of my friend I. Appreciate You. Thanks and now without further ADO. What. All. Right. Let's just say that you're out there listening today and you have a website for your business. The question I would have for you is, are you getting the most number of leads possible? Are you raking high? Touching the canvas through my face or are you ranking? And the Google search engine results. Again I ask are you ranking high? Ranking low on the Google. Search engine search result take a moment today in do a Google search the keywords that you wanna come up top four and see where you are ranking We have a Josh spurlock a CPA from Canada and we have doctor Timothy Johnson here from Tuscaloosa Alabama Josh spurlock how in the heck are you doing pretty good clay yourself I'm doing well doing well here. We're not broadcasting from the man cave studios as normal. So we got a little bit of background noise there to contend with, but we're here and I wanted to see if you could share with the thrive nation approximately how long I've been working together and how that's impacted the number of inbound leads that you're generating as a result of your Google search engine ranking an internet marketing. Well, we've been working together clay now for almost a year a year ago I came out to my first conference, and then we started with the coaching program shortly after that. And you know our our our Google leads have gone from you know something that we would generate. you know maybe one or two or three leads a year to. Talking about three to nine leads every single week. And now we have doctor Timothy Johnson in the box from Alabama Tuscaloosa. Yes. I'm at southern consultants. It's in Tuscaloosa Alabama. We heard about you on the podcast and I had a lot of trepidation at first about. Getting involved just making sure it was legit but all my expectations have been exceeded what concerns did you have about our legitimacy or lack thereof I was just concerned about. Back end up selling. What I was getting into. And that's what I've found my entire career I had you guys been to? Dr Timothy, you've been to other workshops or had other industry coaching before because I had hired a lot of them frankly and I just found I'd spent. I would be lying if I said hundreds of thousands, it's been more than Oh we we hired somebody to do our website right before we found you. Yeah, and it was. Three or four months of your coaching service and they we still haven't launched website yet. Beautiful. Beautiful. So if somebody out, there's thinking about filling out the form and someone's thinking about emailing us to info at thrive time show dot com info at thrive time show dot com. And they have a little bit of hesitation. I don't know just a little bit. What what advice would you have for? Dr Tim. First of all come to one of the conferences, you'll see that he may dress like bill belichick. He. My Wife. PATS fans. That was a real selling point. Nice. She thought you were a Hobo but I said now he's just bill belichick she goes. Okay you can go. But it's also a month a month. So try it and if you don't like it canceled that deserves a mega point. So. Again, what what is? Has. Your sales gone up. Have you increased your sales I mean where's your financial as? The hard number here but as a percentage, how much are you up since since you started with the program what four months ago versus now ourselves up twenty percent we're looking to scale southern consultants and. Are just the number of patients who come in because they found us on. Google has gone up a lot I text you once a week. You paid for yourself just in somebody walking out so. Good it's so God again, if you're out there today and you feel stuck, just email us info at thrive time show dot com info at thrive time show dot com. Let us begin to do a deep dive analysis on your website. We'll. We'll tell you what's wrong with a thirty seven point audit of your website. Art Member of our team will call you. They'll go over with you. They'll break it down. You'll understand what you need to do to improve I'll give you the final word guy. So start with you a captain's Pearl Josh Pearl CPI. As Captain Canada and as a man who has been to two workshops. Now we got audience picture a half million people listening here. What would what is the advice that you would tell them I think got come out to they got to come up to a workshop that you know it's the best one that that I've ever seen. You know I find that most of the workshops I've been to you're sitting around all day for one idea and you're getting a good idea every single hour, these workshops, Dr, Tim, what is the word of encouragement maybe discouragment maybe the motivation maybe the verbal Taes Ring What Advice, would you give for the listeners out there today? I'd say the worst idea you can do not starting now just call and start now and you'll be better off for it. You heard him right there thrive nation go to info at thrive time show dot com email info at thrive time show dot com allow us to do a free thirty seven point analysis of your website will tell you what's wrong. We'll tell you how to fix it. If you're not ranking high enough those Google search engine results it will literally cost your company millions and millions and millions of dollars, but don't take my word for it. Go to thrive time show dot com and click on the testimonials button and as of the time of this recording, we have over one thousand video reviews from my clients I've had from two thousand eight up until now for conference attendees. You're just you're just an email away from a game changing. Becoming a game changing success story emails today Info at thrive time show dot com, and like to end every show every shameless testimonial session where the boom. So now without further ado, three to one.

Lindsey stirling Peter Youtube Google Paul Hood writer Jason Mraz Brian Wilson spotify Peter Hollands Oregon Peter Hollins Bryant Wilson Brian Lindsay America Ross Golan Peter Halt
Tricia Huffman on Becoming a Joyologist for Jason Mraz, Finding Fulfillment & Joy, and Letting Go of "I Should"

Don't Keep Your Day Job

54:43 min | 5 months ago

Tricia Huffman on Becoming a Joyologist for Jason Mraz, Finding Fulfillment & Joy, and Letting Go of "I Should"

"Thanks to as low for supporting. Don't keep your day job as low as a free business checking account with invoicing bill, paying money transfers, no minimum balance and no fees sign up with no minimum deposit at as low dot com slash, dream job and get a free copy of Oslo small. Business Starter Guide. Hey, guys, it's Cathy Heller. Welcome back to another episode of. Don't keep your day job so I'm really happy about today's conversation because Tricia Huffman is year. And tricia is actually very good friends with Jason, Mraz. And you're going to hear her story of how she got to be doing what she's doing now, which is so fantastic, but she actually started out as a sound engineer and she was touring Jason. mraz and Dolly Parton in Colby Calais. And the story is so special and in celebration. Have what seems to be Jason Mraz. Week here on. Don't keep your day job. Apple was so sweet and featured the episode. If you guys saw that. That, but we're so grateful to apple for all their support and Jason is so awesome and Tricia is an amazing person, and it's just so cool that she and Jason are so linked, and I can't wait for you to hear her story. Because I think that you will find it super inspiring. She's a coach. He's a mentor. She's a speaker writer. A podcast her. She's also known as your joy allergists. That's her instagram handle. And I just love her journey because she created so many possibilities for herself. I've never heard anyone do anything like what she's done. Her real gift is helping. Bring people in alignment with WHO. They WANNA be in the world. Her podcast is called. Claim it with your. where she is conversations with awesome people like Jason with my friend Robin Eucalyptus and I was also a guest on her show. Her podcast is all about exploring the fears and doubts and worries had a move through it all and get out of our own way and claim our life. Our joy are worth at our dreams. TRICIA is also the creator of the own your awesome APP. She's created her own affirmation cards that you should definitely check out. And I think you'll just be blown away by her generosity, and what she's built so without further ado, please welcome. The wonderful Tricia Huffman TRICIA. Thank you so much for making the time to be on the show. I've wanted to do this for years. I feel happy to be here and to now know that you wanted to be my friend for years because I did not know that. Very hard to not want to be your friend and those of you I literally feel like it's Christmas and I just gave you a gift so if you don't follow her, you're going to go. Follow her at your job and you're going to see immediately why everybody loves her instantly I WANNA. Talk about your journey. So can you kind of take us through like the creation of you stepping into this part of who you are? Yeah. I have to go back to being fifteen. I had a lot of undiagnosed pain and problems in problems in Blah Blah and also I was fifteen and I was like. What am I supposed to do? Say Look like be you know I felt like I I remember feeling so much pressure to like. Get it right or to figure out like to stand out, but still like blend in just wanting people to like me like me. and. Everything just felt so hard, and also my parents get along, and my sister would like you know four years older and doing her own thing, so I just felt really lost alone, and then the pain, and then undiagnosed pain of doctors, telling me like it was all my mind and all of that. Didn't help. So. I thought about an in my life a lot honestly. One day, I really had a moment. Where like a breaking point where I just now looking back. It was like you know this choice of like you think about this all the time. If you really like hate your life so much then. Are you going to do it? Or what if I chose to try to live life a different way? And I don't think I. had those words for myself back then, but it was sort of like okay. Just end it. Stop thinking about it or give yourself a chance, so I went with that. I gave myself a chance and I chose to live. And I can now see that I'm getting. Goosebumps now that like that's something that I've been doing ever since that I choose to live into, not just be. In going through the motions of life that like I'm choosing to live my life for myself and that back then and that was a lot of starting to come out with like I'm GonNa. Make my opinion of myself. Be The one that matters the most. I'm going to stop trying to fit in so much. Your make everybody like me in and just speak up and say what feels right to me and. Talk to Beth, even everybody says she's a Nerd, so before I was concerned about if I, talk to her, then does that mean honored? That kind has like stupid stuff that weighs on us like I basically so much physical pain. I had had it with the emotional pain that I'd had been causing myself. So that was the sort of like me. Self Love Journey back then, and it's taken. It's still like an every day right like work. I had those lake innings back then and then believing in myself more than anybody else sort of just again like that was like me. Seeing like I'm the only thing that matters is for me to believe in myself. It does not matter if anybody else. My parents, my friends. My Mentor is my teachers. If they understand me. If they believe in me, it doesn't matter. What matters Eilly myself. Should I really loved him? Use It. But I was not trying to play music or singing music. Well I think I mean. I was in my bedroom, you know. But I I really love live music and I wanted to be without knowing what it was. A live sound engineer I went to concerts, and I would see the person console, and I would be like all my friends would be like dancing and partying and I would just be like so turned into the music like the is too loud. The singers need to be louder immaculate. I didn't know again what that was called. I knew that that's what I wanted to do. But I didn't know what it was called so I found my way ended up. Graduating high school in moving to Chicago and starting at House Blue Chicago in the company store selling t shirts because I wanted to get close to the live music and became friends with the sound engineers and the production. People and I said I think that's what they're doing is what I want to do. And I worked for free. For months quit a job, an office job because I was missing load in and wanted to see what it was, and I put my full south into it. I saw that that's what I wanted to do. I believe in myself. It's not a field for girls. You know being a technician. Especially a sound engineer I was nineteen so I always a young girl so again a lot. Lot of people were like roll their eyes at me. Girl, come check out what we're doing, but I was there working for free more than the people getting paid because that's what wanted to do. I wasn't afraid of looking stupid. was what I wanted to do? But I had no idea what it was, so they'd be like Tricia, going to a boom stand and like I don't. Understand is Tricia Mike. The snare drum. What's a snare drums? So it was like a really like. Again like I believe so much in myself that I had to be okay with looking like an idiot and asking for help constantly showing up. And being like okay with like just again like this is what I want what I want I'm choosing to live. This is my wife, I'm not going. Let all these people tell me that I'm never gonNA. Make it and girls can't do sound and do. Many girls go out on tour as sound engineer like. Maybe they were like four at the time, and at the time I also came across a quote from Eleanor Rosenello no one can make you feel inferior without your consent, so that became like my lifeline. No one can make me feel inferior without my consent. Because everyday people. They came through and. Even, though I've had family there then, they wanted to judge me. You're not going to be good enough. You'RE NOT GONNA. Be Good enough. No one can make me feel inferior without my consent, so eventually that turned into I, was touring with Grammy Award winning artists around the world I toured with Dolly Parton as sound engineer it was. Big Deal. And very, few women have had done it to the level that I had, and it's a lot of daily self work. Because I was scared out of my mind like every day. But what that also then dot me to see is I was living at my biggest dream. I had become a live sound. Touring the world staying in Ritz, Carlton's. Being paid to fly the world and travel with these people and hang out with these amazing icons I was living the freaking drink my frigging. And then these people. That were singing their songs that thousands of people around the world showed up for them. You know they even had amazing like relationships. They had it all they literally what we think of as having it all they had all, and yet I could see them not feeling fulfilled enough worthy having doubts having years. They were dealing with the same. You know stuff. But I was and so that was like an awakening of like here, I am and I was also taking very good care of myself because I was eventually diagnosed with fiber myalgia. which you know like that can just be a term. They give to people I. Don't know I don't even know, but so I had certain are also really taken care of myself. I tour with a juicer. I started doing yoga off the bus, and so and I also saw like being on tour is not conducive to like. Being healthy being inspired being grounded like you're in a different place. They're working nonstop, so I was seeing that and then when my father was. Found dead in his car one day and That was the moment that like stopped everything where? I didn't know what to do, so I was supposed to be getting on a plane to Australia last day instead I went home for the funeral, and then went straight to Australia tour, and I was a mass for a couple of weeks, and then I finally just like I kept looking around, and seeing people ever I went, that looked unhappy and unfulfilled, and just like they're walking through the motions of life, but not my God alive, and that was like I. Don't know. Know what I'M GONNA. Do with my life, but I know I have to stop doing sound and I have to do something more like i. want to shake grab everybody that I'm passing on the street and shake them and be like what are you doing? You could die tomorrow. Live your life. Like what are you worrying about like? Just live your life like I just wanted to shake people, and so that was the start of the creation of what I am doing today. But I didn't know I didn't know what I was going to do I just knew I had to quit, and I didn't have any money in the bank I was supposed to be on tour that entire year and I had been. That was my life like I had already been like in that. World found even know how long so I just stopped, and I like went and. took the year off, and like I eliminated the words should from my life. That was I didn't know what I was going to do. But that in that got me to then ask myself every day what I want. Instead of what should I do today? What do I want to do today like I knew I wanted to make the. Difference in the world, but I didn't know how, and so that was the big shift for me, and then I ended up just taking it back on the world that I knew so I ended up going back on tour as a joy allergist. And being the person that grounded the artist empower them lifted them up. Also be like if they were in a bad mood, then I opened the dressing room door. Hi, what's going on? What are you feeling? What are you going to do about it? 'CAUSE also I think people in any sort of power whether they're an artist. Boss were afraid to ask them. What's going on and what they're GONNA? Do just like everybody would rather walk around on tip toes and have the uncomfortable conversation, but that doesn't help anybody. So I did that. I had a lot uncomfortable conversations with lifting up ground him down. I also then became renamed Jason. Mraz also gave me the title of his manager of Integrity. Could be the person that was all so then like because that it is, there's a lot of when you in that like there's so many opinions being projected out you so then being like what are you doing? Why are you doing? How does that feel to you? Do you like that actually serves you and your mission, or is that what you're labels telling you to do? Is that what you're management once you. You do your exhausted all the time from touring. Have you ever thought of saying I don't WanNa tour like that could still tour, but maybe you'd be created different schedule for yourself, so that sort of thing being an advocate for these people in like giving them the space to think about things differently and coming back to where you do it. Why how does that feel for you? It's such an incredible story and It's only the first you know part of it. A lot of times people age don't give themselves permission to even say what do I want be? We don't give ourselves permission to think that we have the right to pursue it. And then the bigger thing is, we don't commit. To doing what it's GonNa, take because we want an immediate Roi. If we'RE NOT GONNA. Do anything unless unless we know, we won't look stupid. We're not going to ask what the center drum is, and we're talking. That's spend eighteen months interning or two years on the road until we know for certain, and you did all of those things you weathered all of that, and then it's just under brought you into this place like of course like it rose to the top. She's the one who's here. She's the one who cares and you've got good at it and people like you, and then you notice this really powerful thing, which is like. Oh my gosh. These people who have everything and like they're having a human experience. So what's going on like? They're not fulfilled like they're not feeling and the fact that you noticed that is huge, and then what did happen to your dad? So Ariza's freezing snowstorm that night, so what they think happened was that he slipped and hit his head got ahead because he was found dead in his car with ahead. WHO's you or whatever it so much? And then you somehow were able to breathe in and out during that, and then not only were you breathing in and out, but you started to use that as fuel. To crack open and shed everything that wasn't working and up level once again and then you just you talk a little bit about how how this insight what you wanted to do, and then you went back on the road is. Joy. ALLERGIST is like no, I Know. How the heck did you do that? What does that mean that you didn't question yourself that you could be like? This is the thing and this is. WHAT IS GONNA? Look like and this is what I'm going to do with these people and I have the confidence in myself to just say this is what I'm doing. Yeah so I didn't know like I said I. Just knew I can't keep doing sound. I felt like I had to do more with my life I had no idea what I was going to do, so I like Dad. Quit My. Dream job. It was also with my dream. Tour and then I ended up doing a yoga teacher training because I was like one else will ever be like. I had already done yoga for many years I. Don't know if I want to be a yoga teacher, but like okay. What else will have this experience to have this time? I really into like cooking, healing food and I just was doing all the things that spoke to me. Read all the personal development books, and whatever like really it was like A. Self study year, but I again I kept knowing I wanted to do more and I didn't know what it looked like, and then it did start to visualize as I. You know again because that was the world I knew I knew live production touring world, and I loved it I. Loved that world so much and I still do so to me. That was like where. Where my mind went, and again because I had seen them being unfulfilled, so I started to visualize yeah, touring bike stocks, it's amazing, but it's rough in the dressing rooms are roles in the food is usually terrible, and so I started to like see these ways that I can make that experience better in that I could nurture and empower the artists to then make. Their voices shine louder and it wasn't about me. It was like all right. These people already out there making differences. So how can I support them? Even more than maybe that will support the people in taking. Their music. Like, Jason. But I didn't know house new already visualized that in my mind, and then what had happened was Jason Raza's production manager. who was someone I had worked with for many years was like Hey, tricia? We. Know that you are done with sound. You don't WanNa. Do sound anymore, but we really miss you on the road, and this year's going to be really big year. We are GONNA add a production assistant to the tour. Would you consider coming back out as a production assistant? So he that was like him making a stretch because for me being. That sound engineer. Production Assistance Work Hard, and I value them very much, but that was sort of like taking a step backwards. Pay Level is well. You know and I was like. This is my in and I said to him. Because I had already had visualization on the phone call before that so I was like. Yes, I am going to come back out the production assistant, but this is what I'm going to do. I'm going to do the job of the production assistant, but also going to make the dressing room nicer. I'm going to be putting formations up everywhere. I'M GONNA lead daily Yoga classes I'm going to be offering like. Bring my like juicer, and by the mix out and I'm going to be like trying to make healthier options. I'M GONNA come out as a production assistant, but I'm with the intention that I'm creating a new role for myself. And that's what happened, so I went out on tour God. That's so awesome. Reduction stint job. Put up the signs. Did that stuff and then also started doing these things. Within two weeks Jason said. I don't know what Tricia is doing, but I just want her to do that. Because I, also was putting affirmations up in the bathroom on the stage again I create a disposition, had for myself, and just started doing it without being paid for it, so I was let me open the door. Let me talk to you. Let's everybody let me talk to everybody on. If I saw somebody upset or not feeling about that I created the rule, I wanted and started doing it without it being a thing. And the results showed up so within two weeks. They hired in production assistant. That production manager said okay so Tristesse, the joy Allah gist that was where the title came from. At Stock? Then they built me a road case kitchen. I had my own dressing room in every venue. From then on out I have my own Ryder. I then really did create this role, and then when that tour ended, and after I rested and recovered. For a time, then had this sent out all my contacts. This is the position on tour. This is why you need me. In Kobe hired me next so I went out and made up a thing I just showed up and did it. It worked, and then I was like people. This is what I do for you. You need me. On was that scary and hard and. This is one of the most amazing stories I've ever heard I am completely blown away by your generosity and your confidence. And your intention, and what's interesting for me? Personally is that colby was on our show. And, most of the conversation was about how much anxiety she had on tour and little did I know. She was talking about you, but she. Basically we had this whole conversation about how if it wasn't for the people who she wound up bringing with her on tour, she never would have made it through. Like! That's amazing what you've done. So what happened? So you did how many tours until you decided to build your own platform? Yes, so when I became the role of joy allergist it also what happened is that was back in the times of twitter and Jason's management really wanted him to be on twitter, and not for them to be running it, so he delegated twitter to me, and so his twitter account used to say Jason Res- official. Twitter account run by his geologist TRICIA. WHO's by his side at all times except in bed or something like that? And I was not going to tweet as him or taken over so what I did. Then we start to tweet the quote of the day I was putting out the affirmation of the day, and we'll do lenses of backstage, and also like here's the green smoothie Jason's drinking, all of that stuff so then, but I was like Oh, twitter, and then when the tour was over of like kind of like twitter, so I started amount, twitter account, and then I in in continued, and so that sort of like started, and then I started writing a blog. And then you know went back on tour, so a lot of my life had been. You go out on tour and it could be for like nine months at a time, and then I like because I always wanted make sure I was taking care of myself and enjoying my life, and I would not. Let. Go tribe on my own or decompress for a couple of months in those bursts, and it came to like oh I build a website. Oh, I have all these information whatever only the Webinar like I never knew what I was doing. People do webinars. Okay, let me figure that out so I would like just do things. Could coach people like while I'm not on tour for a couple of months and then like with coach someone and they'll be like. Oh, going back onto. So I would keep going back and forth for years so I'd have. Do Blogs created this whatever I think. Two thousand twelve was the last year that toward so you know it started with me accepting a job that I didn't want with the intention of creating something else and taking away lower pay and everything like that the end the last job I had I had a contract that included benefits. A year salary like I negotiated for myself, which is again with scary because they could have just said never mind we. We, don't WanNa bring this person because I also had seen people be like Oh. Yeah, I need, you never mind I. don't and stuff like that like gone through that of like because of what the budget of the Horlick's later. How they're feeling in themselves, so I was just like. If you want me to go back on tour and then stop this part of my life, then like I'm going to need a year long salary and I'm going to need benefits and I'm GonNa. Need this like it turned into me. Negotiating my worth, which was serious. And so then by the end of that I was like toast, because I had been on tour for like a year and a half or two years straight, but that was I felt like at that time. I didn't wanNA torn because I wasn't a relationship where I saw it I had always wanted to be a mom, and I was like pretty sure this is the the one, so it was choosing to leave tour to create something for myself that I could do without touring. Because most of my income had always been on tour like I said somewhat done coaching in this and that, but it was like barrier erotic, so I was like I, got us. Eventually I'm going to have to stop and build something else for myself. That sustainable while I can be a mom and I ate it because I love touring so that first six months of like seeing everybody starts to go on tour again and stuff and then omega. Did. I make the wrong choice. 'cause I loved it so much amazing. How at the right choice? Yeah so then that led to like starting the the first thing that after that was like creating my affirmation to act of own. You're awesome in. That was like the first thing I'm going to product. Line, Creating Group coaching programs and one on one programs, and yes, now at the digital daily inspiration APP and. Reading a book now. I had to give myself space to look at the bigger picture of like the bigger impact, and like if I want to be a mom, I can't keep torturing and do this and I also wanted to be able to reach more people. It's incredible. I can't believe how many times when there's sort of a a turn in the maze, and you just recreate yourself all over again every single time. You're on this mystical scavenger hunt. And you'll just be like wait. What's that next little clue? Great, let me just do that. That's what I mean that there's a part of you. That feels like it's connected to something. Because most people can't do it unless they can see it. And everything in your story is like and then I had this like there was like a clue, so I was like. Let me just see where that leads. And I opened that door, and that door leads to this story, then that is this you know there's just keeps going. What's the thing that you really want to say? What's the thing that you really want them to know? I think the thing that the most that I most want them to know in. This was one of the podcast now. I. Keep Coming back to is like it's up. To us so often. We're I think we're just programmed to be like Oh once I do this. I'll feel enough once I have this once. I'm this weight enough. Worthy successful fulfilled happy lovable, whatever it is, that were program to look for it outside of ourselves, and that that is that it's you have to claim it for yourself every single day like I have doing it, so it's it's hard so every day I'm like. This is an I'm not enough. Struggle Okay Tricia like comeback back to like. Oh, I'm aware what I'm worried about what people we're going to think if I say this if I do this if I dare to believe in myself if I tell my story if I would ever it is, and then it's like, but what do I have to keep coming back to what do I believe about myself like that thing that I got when I was fifteen like I have to make what I believe about myself to be the most important thing and coming back to that we can get so caught up in what will other people think of us? But those are really just our own judgments of ourselves, so like the constantly seeing. It's up to you to claim your worth to claim that you are enough claim that you're lovable like you. I've seen it. You can have the most love in the world. Instill, not be accepting of that love. Right and you can like. Somebody can give you the big acknowledgement compliment ever and I remember like always wanting like i. want to be seen. Please me and thank you Kathy so much for seeing me in everything you've been saying it's like so much to me. But again like for me to actually fully absorb that I have to be able to see it within myself. So I want being knowledge all the time I. Want People to see me, but the real work is constantly reminding myself to see myself. Myself to see my worth, but my value, my enough because that's where it comes from. That's what's allowed me to see these little glimmers on things and make them be real. It's huge, and it really is everything and we had Byron Katie on the show and it's. She's very threatening to some people because she's basically telling you that you're creating your own suffering. Because it's an illusion that it's coming from anything outside of the narrative that you're believing in telling yourself. People really have a hard time with that because. Void. We Really WanNA. Make it about our husband. Would we really WANNA make it about our boss or do we really WanNa? Make it about what someone isn't giving us. And I forget that too, and it's fascinating that you're saying like. We. Get to decide every day. We get to choose it. And then a so much to do with how we receive. What's coming in? Is that the consistent thing that you saw? And that you see working with people is that they don't give that to them, self. Yeah I. That's again in a union and you mentioned earlier let. That I've able to do this. Because of the work that I have done and continue every day to on myself, and that's what I have. Figured out boils down to. Is that like why I was able to work? With? The biggest people are different things in relate to them that empathy and compassion because I now I'm also aware of what's happening in my own mind, and instead of blaming myself and beating myself up for it. I'm like Oh that's like the human. Experience and we all have that, and so of course we have different life stories in different challenges and different hardships. But like within our minds, it's so similar this like daily fight in so just being able to see that in in people and I think I've always been able to see multiple sides of every story in this to just like. Yeah, it's like. Not Knowing, of course, anybody's like personal experience because I don't think anybody can, but just like having that compassion for the human. That we all have an allowing them to see that within themselves. It's incredible, and as far as you know, it's interesting what you were talking about earlier because I used to say you know that the opposite of depression is not happiness. It's a sense of purpose, but what I found out which is really sneaky. Is that purpose really helps a lot? But it's also not the end of it like I feel a tremendous amount of purpose in my life I feel like my work is not a job. It's a gift. It's a mission I love it I love being a mother. A loving friend is a Lotta purpose in my world, and I still have a lot of run INS with feeling deeply sad and deeply anxious. And so when you talk about seeing these beautiful souls on tour, who've created so much purpose, right? Their work is not just hype. There's something meaningful in the songs. They sing in the work that they've created and yet they're still something's missing. So, that begs the question, so what is that Ben if it's not purpose, what is the thing that makes us feel fulfilled felt. The first thing I was just going to say was ourselves like I. Don't have a word or like it action how we treat ourselves. Would you say how we take care of ourselves? How we look at the world? How we changed the way we think yeah, yeah, I mean, and it's just again because it's going to be though it's like the getting that not like I got it. Did it did the work on? You know like that. It's like it is. It's a daily thing and sometimes a moment to moment thing because it's not even you know I used to always make sure to be like you know you never know what life's GonNa throw at us in sort of like in a struggle format. But what I can also see when we get the things that we really want Oh, I met the man of my dreams or the woman of my dreams I got the kids I got the job I got the book deal I got promotion. Then all of its come back like flashes back so it's just constantly. I mean that that quote I mentioned at the beginning. No one can make you feel inferior with yourself. What that ended up shaped me to believe? No one can make me feel anything without my consent. No one can make me feel joy. No one can make me feel loved. No one can make me feel appreciated. Nobody can make me feel enough fulfilled without my consent. It's me consenting to that every frigging moment. So it's constant work, and so you just get more conscious love that and be like Oh. It's me I'm what's The missing? Key Me me acknowledging it my approval me. Consenting I'm so filled today. He didn't do anything on my list. How necessary is what you say every day? But especially this year when there's so much going on, and you can say Oh my God look at all these circumstances. Circumstances, I now miserable and I have, and that's it period. This is where I stay now. I stay miserable because of all of these things that is defeating place to be and what you're saying is so right on. It's so right on my grandmother used to say life. It's timbers. What happens is ninety percent. How you react to it right? It's your choice. It's what you how you perceive it. But we don't spend that time. Yeah, I WANNA share it. You just made me think of like this thing I like narrowed it down to last year, because one of my like key phrases for years, my product line was the only judge of me. Is Me meaning like we spent so much time? Worry about what other people will think that I. Realize a judgment can only really have power over you if it's something, you believe to be true about yourself, so we're so afraid of what people may or may not be judging us for when most of it like. Yes, of course, people will say things you. They're actually judging you. You, but again you get that choice. Do I believe this to be true? Even though that sucks and can hurt then you allows you to lift it off, but most of the stuff is just in our own minds. That's holding back that. What will people think so? Then you get to see, but what do I, think. Do I believe this to be true? If I say this, people are GonNa think this is that what I believe by wear this or whatever if I declare, I'm of this? If I call myself a just whatever people going to think, what do I think about bad to constantly bring it back to you. It's so juicy and it's so true that things that we can't triggered by. It's because of what we corroborate on. That's really powerful. Okay I have a lot more I. 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At a traditional bank, you can just go to as E. L., O., Dot Com and you can apply in as little as ten minutes, and with as Louis Free instant funding feature, you can deposit two thousand dollars in access it in your account. Instantly as it was owned by Va USA, member FDIC, they make business banking so easy and offer a fee free checking account, and it's no surprise that money magazine called them. The best business option for freelancers and entrepreneurs sign up right now with no minimum deposit at as low dot. COM SLASH DREAM job. Job and get a free copy of as Smart Business Starter Guide spelled as E. L. O. DOT COM slash dream job and sign up with a free small business starter guide, a no minimum deposit, as low dot com slash dream job I want to ask you a couple of the things that my listeners struggle with, because you're so wise and I would love to hear your perspective so two things the first thing. When I started this podcast, I thought Oh. Wouldn't it be cool if I could help? People figure out how to do what they love. Before you even can teach people. The steps. One of the things that people struggle with is like I. don't even know what makes thing is okay now when they say I, don't know. It's usually because they're believing one of two lies, which is I? Do Know But I. Don't think I'm worthy of it. Or I do know, but there's no way it's possible. So, really I'm just GONNA. Tell myself I don't know and I really think I don't know. Or I have three things I could do and just stay stuck because I. Just don't know what's really to me. Is like fear of like choosing the wrong thing or making a fool of yourself or whatever? What is your answer? If someone's like I would love to be fulfilled. I would love to be working somewhere that I feel passionate about her helping a cause or making an impact in the world. They're feeling aligned with myself, but I have no idea what that thing is. How do I figure it out? That's the biggest question I get. Yeah I totally believe. With the with the reasons you name to, and like yeah, I have my own drought discourse, and that's one of the things like some people just don't even allow themselves the permission to dream into what is possible because they are like so stuck on will that will never happened. About I will never be able to make that happen, or that will never be worth, so they don't even allow themselves to like dream about the possibility, which also plays into like the fear of failure. You know it's like there really is no fee. If you go back to my thing like the fear of being judged, really is no fear of failure. Because why would you the only reason you're? Fear of failing is because what would other people think about you? So. Really, it's all. Come back to what you would you think about you like? There's no such thing as failure when you come into realizing like the fear of failure is still what will other people think about me if nobody knew you failed like who cares, it's you. It's your own judgments again. So that seeing. Okay, believe myself. Yeah for me in this is I brought it up earlier which that was what got me into creating the position that became the joy allergist was eliminating. The word should was huge for me. And that's what I'm writing my first book about in so like just paying attention. We're so programmed into should. By that I feel like we're constantly unconsciously. Giving all over life choices away were outsourcing all our life choices, so we are never causing to even imagine what do I want. How does this make me feel so I? Eliminated that word the year my father died, which was two thousand eight, and the only word that I found fit was want so then every time should comes up. Switch it out with one, and just you'll be amazed of what starts to show for you and your life. Trying to think about what you WanNa, do with your life, but just oh, what should I eat today? What do I WANNA eat today? Which I do with you know the night now that the kids are asleep. What do I WANNA do like you're constantly giving yourself this space of possibility and bringing it. Act Yourself instead of looking outside of yourself. That's one of the most mic drop things I've ever heard. We outsource these decisions. What a powerful thing to really get! It's so true. And we're. It's so in our blind spot. It's amazing what you just said. Yeah, it's on one word paying attention to it, and it really makes you face yourself all day long in see, it's one word. It makes you see like why again like if you're like Oh, I should do this. Oh No, but the one. What's making me feel like I can't do what I want like. It's just one word to focus on, and it makes you face yourself and get in touch with yourself. Get in touch with your intuition. What's motivating your choices? It can cut out procrastination even like Oh. I should really answer these emails. Why would I WANNA? Answer these emails because then? I will like won't feel about weight anymore, and then I can get onto the next thing because I really do want to show up as somebody. Who's you know in communication? Whatever all right? If I wanted to those emails, but it's like that's my game. Changers secret for so many things in life brilliant. The next thing that comes up and you already hinted at it. But when you think it's not possible, you shut down the I want you know it doesn't matter what I want because I already decided. It's not possible so the biggest reason I find that people don't think something's possibles because they have imposter syndrome, so it's not possible because I'm not good. Enough I'm not worthy of it, so I see people struggle with starting. With making things that are mediocre, because I can't do it, unless I'm going to be Mozart the first time, and if I'm not, it just reinforces that I'm not good enough. So how do you help people on that road? To. Becoming and living the life they want when they believe they're not worthy, and then they have to sort of. Start where they are right and they have to be imperfect. So this impostor syndrome thing. How do we get through that? So with should switching to one thing does help me so much because again then I. It's making me see of like. Why do I WANNA do this. It also sees the motivation of even like. Why do I WANNA make this thing? Why do I want to create this service? You know even though these people are doing it because i. feel like called to wake people up in my language because I can feel it with me so like again. Tuning into that is allowing you to ask yourself. Why do you WanNa? Do it like what's motivating you. And so that can help me get out of my own way and do things in clients the same thing to be aligned with Wi whether they want to do it, and then with part of the narration is sort of like. How would it make me feel to do that? You know like in I always just even focused on like one person still like I'm GonNa. If I make this post in one person says, thank you so much I needed it then like VAT feels like worthwhile that it's not that I of course I. WanNa have a huge following of course I want people to like. Listen to my words and stuff like that, but I always have to. To come back to like. If there's one person out there right now, that could feel something from me sharing for me putting something out there from my affirmation debt from this product, whatever then that feels good in it because it's the the feeling of doing, it makes me come more alive me connected to myself me connected. My purpose like enough course doesn't mean all the other people that might be doing. Something similar aren't worthy are amazing in the beyond say they're out there and stuff like that, but it's just like allowing yourself to believe in yourself again, and and also like coming back to even like choose to live, and so what makes you come alive and? Most people can struggle with. It's being like me. What about me or I'm doing? This is already enough. People bring it so I am saying it is all about you. But then there's also this thing of like what's motivating me like. I mean I created a career and I'm like hey, everybody listening to me I have so many important things to say. But again, it's all been motivated by like wanting other people to wake up, so it's a different, you know it's a thing of like coming back to like sure this about me. Creating something mead building, something whatever it is that you're out there, struggling with putting out into the world, but what is the impact that can have on one person? Why do you want to do best so good? I love this idea of looking at it like you know, it's not relevant. What other people are doing I? Feel called to do it even if one person you know. I feel called to hope so. I'm GONNA Trust that. It's interesting because. The word. gised remember when I first saw it I was like. That's like a threatening thing. Shot feels unattainable. Right. And we just get so used to days that don't have joy. And months that don't have joy and when Martha back was on my podcast, she talked about her book called the Joy Diet. And she said these are the things you need to do every day you know, spend fifteen minutes doing nothing. Listen to some music by yourself a bouquet of flowers just because they should all these diet you know, of course not about food, but for your own joy. And she said people were amazed at everything she would say and she was like. I'm not saying anything novel other than. How could you go to sleep at night? Put your head on the pillow and not have done something that brought you joy today, and if you did that's a productive day. That was a day well spent. The joy is enough of an excuse for being. And I think that we are not working toward it as much as we're working towards achievement, I think that people are wired to I'll be loved if I perform. Do a good job. And then we miss decades of our life. And there's no joy, and what the Hell is that? And how can you help us understand how we can release the shame? And let so do the thing in the middle of the day. Just because it feels good, not because it's productive, not because it furthers our bottom line or even serves our neighbor just because it literally makes us feel happy and alive. How is that so? Divorced from who we are. Totally get that and not even like I. fumbled into being an entrepreneur online business owner in most of the people that I had followed. It seems such like work work. Work strives drive in Oslo like. What I'm GonNa like stop working now because I gotTa, do this thing and I. Honestly I think that was. A blessing, fiber, Myalgia and chronic pain is that it at has training to me that I have to take care of myself and prioritize myself even when it feels leg, but I have these things these deadlines in these goals or whatever? So. Kate north of read her do less. Unlike thank you someone for talking us because that was the way it is. Always lived. That was programmed into me the like because of my body, and and seeing though firsthand that. I'm not good for anybody if I'm not taking care of myself and making space for joy, the thing to get Austin again. We are so like I can't do this for myself. It's selfish or I'm doing this thing I'm working on this groundbreaking, so I have to keep working on it. Whatever it is is that if you can't think about like I'm worthy of joy, and this is going to help me think about how you're affecting everybody else in your life. So you've pause you go, do something you take the rest of the day off and do something that's good for you. How does that shift your energy year more present? You're more alive. Alive you're more gracious grateful, and so you're showing up to everybody in your world that way your kids, your neighbors, the people in line at the store whatever they get this version of you, that is now like expanding and alive and awake enjoy filled, not the version of you that has been slaving over your computer, giving to everybody else this that is like a shell of a human, and is like whatever, so it's like back for me I think is a good way to look at it because we can feel like I'm not allowed to have joy I'm not allowed to two things. Take care of myself. I'm not allowed to prioritize my own. Needs Joy, whatever will think of that how you're showing up in the world for everyone else then if you can't think about it for you, how are you showing up for other people? What what you just said that to me is the fact should be the political conversation because. It's actually so selfish. To be depleting yourself and think that's not going to ripple. Around right and instead we're so worried about what's happening on the other side of the world. Like what about yourself like? You're on fire like you're literally burning and we're so wired exactly what you just said. That's not true that selfish right and it's not. It's the opposite yourself. Realization is the greatest gift you give others right? It reverberates and so important. The work that you do is so important. You guys I told you. There's a reason I. Love Her. She's a gift are a gifts and special to tell us where we can follow and Buy Your Products Enjoy your coaching. Listen to the claim it with your. Podcast, tell where we can find all your stuff. Yeah, I'm most active on Instagram at your. Just your shop, also there. My website is your drought dot Com Youtube, everything's your joy, allies, Youtube, channel, everything, and also the daily inspiration APP. That's called own your awesome. Deck of cards, but yeah, so in the APP store Google play an apple APP store owner. Awesome. It's hundreds of powerful thoughts and affirmations you can set a daily reminder time to get a card or come into any day, and it's only three ninety nine and I. Add cards to it all the time. No other fees, so it's totally worth it and you can get it to. Other people do which is like the coolest gift I think. They're so awesome. There beautiful ear, really extraordinary a can't be said enough, and it's amazing that you walk around in. You look like a normal person, but that's all these things. Come out of you. It's really inspiring, you guys. If you WANNA. Get a gift for someone. She did not tell me to say this but I just thought to say it in this moment that we're living in. Were there so much pain? I promise if you went to the products that she has an you. Send a friend of yours. Any of those things including that deck. Guarantee you. You will change somebody's life. Today couldn't be a better thing in this moment, Tricia, you're the best. Thank you very very much for being you. Know my Gosh I could seriously talk with tricia hours nonstop. She's amazing here. Are The takeaways number one? Give yourself a chance choose to live. Do It makes you come alive number two? No one can make you feel inferior without your consent number three. Don't outsource your life. Choices eliminate the word should and replace it with one, and before you have to claim your worth. You have to know that you're enough that you're lovable. It's up to you number five year. Approval is the biggest key to making you feel fulfilled number six. A judgment can only have power over you. If it's something you believe to be true about yourself. The only judge of you is you. A number seven. If there's one person who can feel something from you sharing your gifts, then that's enough all right now. Let's celebrate your winds. Rebecca posted in our facebook group in. She said I had a serious today. I did my first stained glass class for the year, and it went amazing. It's sold out if I could just do one sold out class a week. I could quit my day job. I'm so pumped. Also contacted this week to get started on a custom window. Rebecca that so awesome. I'm really proud of you for one. You had the courage to offer your class, and you put it out there into your selling out all these spots. That's amazing. I'm so excited for you and I. WanNa see how this is going to go, so please let us know how it all unfolds. You guys can go give Rebecca some love. Her instagram is at Rebecca's nerd glass. Nine, one eight all right? Here's the next one. Jamie said I was finally able to launch my online dog training. Course on I'm so excited I. I spent so much time making it perfect, and it's finally out there in the world for everyone to see keeping my fingers crossed. It takes off Jamie. I'm so happy for you. I know this will be so helpful for voters especially right now if they're not able to take their pets to dog training in person I love that you're trying to fill this need and that you gave yourself permission to finally hit. Publish and get this out there. If any of you listening has a dog that could use some behavior adjustments than go check out. Out Her awesome course training with Jamie, J., A. M. I. Dot Com and give her your support. Thank you guys so much for listening to this show. I know that there is a zillion things you could be doing right now, and it does mean the world to me. It really does that. You're here and that you're listening so I promise I'm GonNa, keep putting out really awesome episodes for you. If you're not subscribe already, it's free to subscribe. Please go ahead and subscribe on Apple podcasts or wherever you listen, you can get more fun episodes. Episodes in I'm actually doing a really fun giveaway this week of some Jason Mraz goodies. So if you come to my instagram at Kathy Dot Heller, you'll see a couple of posts where I talk about how to enter the giveaway. All you have to do like the post Tagore friend, and subscribe to the PODCAST, and I'll pick three winners and send you some really fun packages. If this episode inspired you, please share it with somebody. Because maybe it would inspire them to a league. Is The song of mine and I'll talk to you Monday. Many Times. So many times. Saying I needed to scare. News. Now. Game! Live. This. Says I can't answer. That I'm alive. I'm assuming. The courage. You. Got The heart of. So Strang. As. Much. Ha Ha.

Tricia Huffman TRICIA Jason Work engineer twitter Jason. mraz production assistant Apple Dolly Parton Tricia Huffman Oslo Rebecca WanNa Cathy Heller writer Beth Grammy Award Tricia Mike Australia
50 Questions With Adults React's Scott | Too Many Questions #13

FBE Podcast

37:39 min | 2 years ago

50 Questions With Adults React's Scott | Too Many Questions #13

"Hello, everybody welcome to another episode of too many questions on your host, Benny fine. Every episode of too many questions we bring in a cast member from the f. b. in react shows because we get the comments. I want to know them better. I went to understand who they are, not just playing video games, not just from their opinion about something in the world, but who they just deep down. So that's where we have this show. So today on the show, my guess is Scott from adults and parents series that we produce be who has been from the very beginning of adults react. So I want to say it's been over two years now. Yeah. The first episode I was wondering about that the other day myself came out in July of two thousand fifteen Parisi. So it's already been over two years of adults react and you've been here from the beginning time is going fast, so you can follow us on Twitter if you want to get involved with this show at f. b. but you need to be following. Otherwise I ignore you. So follow us their use the hashtag TM cue to request guests in questions that you'd like us to ask, but it's time to get to know Scott. It's time to ask him a lot of questions. We'll see how many I get through in about a half hour or so of time. Are you ready? Scott for this. I think so. Yeah. I guess I gotta be ready, right? I guess. So you get asked a lot of questions. It's when you're a reactor your life as it is. It's a lot of questions and as a teacher, you get even more questions. Well, elementary question. Okay. So let's dive into it and some of these questions I ask everybody, some of them were custom to use some come from the fans. So here we go. So what does your full name, including middle name? A full name is Scott, Matthew Larios. So it's that's it to Scott Scott. Matthew Laureus. And yeah, if you've ever heard the Scott Matthew, like mom, Yellen, Scott, Matthew, you were done and what are the various places you've lived across your life or have you always lived in California? I've lived in a lot of places. Okay. So here's the list. Bakersfield Laguna gal vista oceanside Tillamook, Oregon, mission viejo in Fresno. Okay. So lots of mostly in callously, California, three years in Oregon, in the northwest corner of Oreo, Scott commutes extreme. Far for those of you don't live in California. Fresno. It's crazy to me that you still do this all the time. It is like a drive. It's you get used to it. I mean, it's kind of just expands your your boundaries. Well, always very appreciated that you care enough that you want to drive that far all the time. I love this and you guys are so amazing. I don't get paid to say this, but no, like everybody here is just so welcoming, and it becomes part of like the your extended family that you care so much. And that's why I do it because you guys read. You guys read. So going back to your childhood, we're your parents together over the course of your life, or did they split up? They were together. They're still together to this day. Yeah. So this day. And what's your relationship like with your parents now that you're apparent good? I would say actually having my own kids has helped like smooth over some things that might not have been the smoothest in the past without getting too crazy about stuff, but, but it's good. I mean they live only a few miles away. Everybody in in fresno's this weird town where like you run into someone and they know someone who knows your dad or someone else. My dad grew up there. I didn't grow up there. We moved all around and so you'll be talking and they'll be like, oh, yeah, or I talked with somebody that knows you and it's weird. So will you always having a good relationship with your parents or was there rough patches through your through your up? For the most part? It's interesting because I feel like there was a lot of focus spent on my sister. Her my sister and in. So I kind of just did my own thing, especially when I got into high school and college, I don't remember being home that often ever or seeking counsel from my parents. It was in care that you weren't around? Well, I was I was involved. So the fact that I was involved in music and sports and things like that. They were just like, well, he's staying out of trouble and that was that was enough. So yeah, it wasn't the closest I mean we had meals together, but other than that, I don't remember sharing a ton or very getting very deep with them, you know, on on anything and you just mentioned her, but you have any siblings have a younger sister. She's four years younger and what's relationship with her? It's good now. Now that she's an aunt again, kids, they smooth things most of the time don't advocate to smooth things over. No, it it was rough. She was. She's awesome. I mean, she's the best aunt in sister and there were there is separation. I think the four years played into that. Sure, sure. Especially when you're younger, that's a big gap for when you're a teenager, right? But then we just ran in different circles. And so I, I myself as well as her doing other stuff and and took a long time, longtime for us to get back to good. And I think we're, we're great now. She's also. Awesome. And she does a great job with my kids like hanging out with my kids and all that. I think that's relatable to a lot of people that might be listening to this. I feel like they have. They just don't get along or their sibling doesn't understand them, and it's possible that over the years that that can mend. Yeah, it takes time. I mean, it really took time in conversations. I think there were times where we were both frustrated about different things that we had no clue about. And and I think that just over time the course of time in other conversations and and I, you know, she would kind of reach out and I would kinda like, no. And then it took me also making that effort of being like, you know what? She's trying. I need to need to stop being such a jerk and that that helped a lot. And how old were you when you got married? Oh, man, we just celebrated fifteen years. So I was twenty. Six? How did you hoes? I proposed. Oh man. Seriously. Dang, this is heavy stuff. I did kind of like a fake out. There's this big park in in Fresno, and we drove to look at the sunset. It was a Monday night in in. I was had all my buddies over for Monday night football in. So like I'd given one of my buddies the keys to have the house open in like desserts setup and all this kind of stuff, but I am faked her out. We parked halfway through the park watched the sunset. She thought I was gonna like propose at that moment. No, no, no, no wasn't going to do it there. So we drove through and there was this last little like view shelter. I guess you would call it and I had had some other friends set up on these two long, picnic tables, just candles hall up and down. Oh, you went the candle. Anna had the guitar and why? Yeah, I played a song and I mean by the time we're walking up and we're stopping them like, oh, we should stop and take a look at this. What is that? She knew it was going on and then yeah, had the guitar. They're playing song. Four and she said, yes. And what was your wedding like? Is that a good memory. I wonder how much research you've done. This kind of stuff. Okay. Our research, our research, our wedding. It was one hundred eight. Oh no, outside our photographer had a heart attack. I'm away out of the ceremony. Luckily one of my groomsmen Bs, that's those are his actual initially firefighter. He tended to the photographer until the paramedics can tell. They were very respectful and didn't have their sirens on as they got to the venue. And then the party continued. But everybody was just roasting, it was one hundred eight and the weekend before it was like seventy something degrees. And that was the weekend we had originally wanted, and it didn't work out with with all the all the other planning. So yeah, I mean, other than that, it was great. We got to for Hyman we got. We just went up and down the coast of all the places to live. And so I knew the territory, but but yeah, it was brutally hot. But I mean, I couldn't married a better woman. So that's the bonus. How many kids do you have and how old are they? Now we have three. Our oldest just turned twelve, their twelve eight and five. And what's the hardest part of being a parent in today's age compared to when you were raised. Man, I think kids exposure to everything due to social media and the internet, and it's not as self contained where you're, you're raising your kids in your home. I mean, there was always parts of that when you would have your kids go to public school and things like that, but now it's on a grander scale because these kids can introduce other things that you would never think would be introduced either in public school playground or in our home. And so it's really about having those conversations with them about, okay, this is this is how what we feel is appropriate or this is how we should talk or we don't use this kind of language, or you know, we're not going to watch that and they're like, but my friends watch this and and you're like, yeah, but and I know it's right on their phone. You know, we've had to have the conversation with our oldest one Lucy about like a having a phone, right? You know, right. Would never even considered when you were you were twelve ever. Yeah. Yeah. And so you know, once you got home, you were. Other than like a telephone almo- wall. You were cut off from the rest of the world, and you would be with your family now you can come home and you're still plugged in everywhere. And that's probably the biggest shift is your kids aren't always yours. -sarily. Did you always know that you wanted to have kids? Yes, yes, I always did. I don't know why. I just always. It just just new and we rigidly talked in like, I'm good with two because that's what I was raised with. My wife was raised with two other siblings, so three kids in her family, but her dad is one of nine. And so she was teetering on the edge of like, I think I want four or five, and I'm like, oh, really in. So then we got our two. We had our boy. We had her girl and we had our boy and one day she comes to me and she's like, hey, I think I'm good. Like the third one we were talking about, no. And then surprise. Yeah. What's something that you thought about having children and being apparent was going to be like, and then you had them, and then your perspective totally changed about something. Oh, man. That's that's tough. That's a really tough one. I thought dinnertime would be so much easier, and I thought that you could actually get some sleep because as a kid, I was quiet and maybe it's because my dad's scared me into being quiet. Like when I'd get up early, I'd go downstairs and just turn on the TV by self and watch like bozo the clown or like old school, Spiderman, fantastic cartoons. Like that's what I remember. And I would leave my parents alone, but my kids to, oh my gosh, they don't sleep the boys or up at like five twenty in the morning. And and then mealtime, you learn to scarf your food because someone has to take care of someone else always like this kid's done and running off or especially when they're babies like you learn to eat so fast as a parent. I did not realize that you can get an entire meal in under five minutes, like it's crazy. That's that's probably the perspective that's and then the different interests. All three of my kids have interest you'd think with like music and sports. In my background like Dade wannabe musicians and athletes, and it's not necessarily the case with all of them to your marriage. How do you keep them marriage healthy with how many people really struggle with that? And you're at fifteen years and three kids? How do you do it? It doesn't come without its own set of struggles, no matter. I mean without fifteen years in it, it's never been. It's not perfect. Yeah, you know. And that's, that's the biggest thing. I don't want people to think that you know, we made fifteen years and we're flawless. No. I mean, we've had our share of major major talks and conversations and and things. I mean. If it helps someone else. And I, you know, share, whatever, then that's good if another adult is watching this, but like we've, we've gone to marriage counselling before. I think it's important to talk about those things because often when we have the like the younger people on the show, they talk about their struggles with mental health and going into therapy, and that's something to continue to be working on through your adult life and through things like marriage and nothing to be like, oh, no marriage counseling that's healthy, you? Absolutely. I mean, it it either. I think in both cases, we went to a counselor when we were first dating, knowing that we were moving towards marriage, and then we were seeing another counselor when we were when we were married and going through some stuff, and it opens your eyes to to what gives you a good perspective on things, but really what it just does is open doors of communication that maybe you've shot right in. That's the biggest thing with making marriage work is being honest and open, and you know, I mean, it's not that you can't have your own space or your own thing, or what. Ever, but just being really honest with your communication and talking because we were noggin communicators when we first started when we first got married, and you know that that leads to resentment and anger in unspoken problems and all these other things that you're just like, if we just talked about it, it would have been so much easier. We wouldn't have had to go down this really, really rocky road. So moving to profession, were you ever in a band. I have. I have been in several bands, some success. Some success actually. Yeah. In college. I was in a band, we called ourselves flipside, and we had the opportunity to play with bands like blink one eighty two and save ferris who's an old Scott banned from Orange County. Some bands from the east coast. The manager for save ferris came in actually saw us play one night and the power went out in the middle of our set. It's great. She flew in from England to come to sign us. They left Fresno and became a band called mixed mom, mixed mob, not mix, mom, mixed mob, and I stayed in Fresno, and then kicked around a couple of other bands playing acoustic duo. That was kind of like a Jason Mraz rip off the kind of big. And then the most recent one was poor man's poison. And we were doing very well. The band won the Texaco country showdown in Nashville in lots of money, and. We I was on their live recording and would always rehearsed with them and kick around. We we met at America's got talent additions and. And then we finished our last album. And right after we finished our last album. The band kind of imploded with with like record contracts in talks on the table kind of thing. And and I was like the guy like percussion keys, whatever they needed. So three of us ended up having to finish the album on our own together, like the three of us and then put it out to no fanfare, we'd sold out some some venues and would rule and really, really strong and just, yeah, fell apart. So with that and the music side not fully working out entirely what you currently do for work? I am a teacher. I'm a junior high teacher. I teach seventh grade math. Yeah. Do you enjoy it? I do at times I was deep breath. Yes, I do. I enjoy. Math is good. I was doing language arts and history before, and I loved it because you could take conversations in so many different directions in each class was different. Now I teach six straight periods of math, seven, and it's the same thing six times for dire day. Right? So that gets a little monotonous, but you can't argue with math, it's either right or it's wrong. So what's the most difficult situation you've encountered as a teacher? Oh, man. Gosh, or if there's even this a recurring thing that you see that is difficult but you handle it, but you're seeing? Well, I mean, honestly, some of the most difficult things were times when students have come to me some heavy like family issues and then how to how to approach that you become such a line of defense that you hear stories of going so wrong when they went to a teacher and then that led them on the wrong pattern. That's gotta be some pressure of feeling like, are you doing the right thing? Oh, yeah. All the time. And you do you question if you're doing the right thing and did I help enough? And that's that's tough because you don't know. You don't always know the boundaries boundaries are there and in like, okay, am I going too far if I approach the parents or is this one of those situations where I need to call CPS? You know, you run into those kinds of things in and you try and help. But then there are also there only certain things we can do as teachers. You know, we, we can't solve everything all the problems in go right to that. Outsource all the time because sometimes I mean, I'll be honest like you'll hear about some kids messing with another one and you want to rip their faces off, but you have to go through the proper channels. And if you don't have the right stories lined up, there's all these legal implications and that I would say the the personal stuff had a former student pass like commit suicide. That kind of stuff is is really heavy. So what about the flip side? What is something great about being a teacher? Man, it's it's kind of one in the same. Having kids want to come talk to you and add like seek your counsel in your advice. Having a kid get it and ask a question, be like, oh my gosh, or just seen my first group of junior highs ever taught just graduated this year. So just seeing that and the kids like coming up and going, I did it and I'm like, yeah, that's excessive. Do you think that you may teach for the rest of your life? Oh, man. Whoever's watching for my school district. No, I don't want to be honest. I'm scared of where things are headed with students and kids and things like that. I mean is no longer an option because I've kinda aged out of that or I'd say I'd want to be professional musician, but but I don't know what I'd wanna do. I just know that teaching I feel like my time is this is something that's been important to you that you are very passionate about, but you feel like it's running its course would segues into my next question that I love asking people that are around your age. In my age, people feel like goals aspirations. Dreams are young persons endeavor, but do you have aspirations still at this phase of your life? I do. I really do. There are things where I've, like I said with music, if I could be a session musician, that'd be sick, but I don't know if that could ever happen. I, I would love to have my own coffee shop. My wife's a pastry chef. So. So have a coffee shop with pastries, music and play music. I'd love to have that with like a recording studio or space in the back, and then you pick out the best bands to play on Friday and Saturday nights. See, see, this is what I'm saying. You still have dreams. Yeah, stop when you grow up. Yeah. Well, and just you guys, everything that you do here. I've been trying to do my own stuff on my channel and it's it's horrible, but like I really enjoy it. And now I can't watch a movie. Thanks to you guys without thinking of like the light. Mike, how did the camera work and doing this? I analyze everything and I rarely enjoyed the move are ever going to go through some rapid fires. So just I don't ever think it's okay. What's your favorite movie? Gosh, you list I told you don't feel goonies. Perfect. Favorite TV show the office favorite band or artist's. I can't stand this question eagles eagles. John Mayer is sick to ours and. The Beatles favorite color. Blue. Favorite all time. Video game. Oh, I'm going to have to say street fighter two on which console super Nintendo fame. Yeah, I was the Genesis kid, but not with streetfight. It's gotta be this Freenet. How many tattoos do you have? I honestly don't know. It's too many to count. I've had. They're all over like they go. We get them, there's they're, they're everywhere. There's even one neat, their lose his handprint right there. Yeah, they're everywhere. How old were you? Got your first two. I was twenty two. I think I got the stars underneath. And why? This many tattoos, Scott, it's an addiction to be honest. It started off with the stars and it was kind of like that Lion King part where the stars in the sky or the former kings and stuff, and and I got those for my grandparents because I didn't really know my grandparents and then the kids I got Lucy's handprint got butters, which is what we call my middle son. I played drums and on the back. There's animal in the back is the Swedish chef for my wife, and I thought I was done and then many whole came around. So the whole. And then we were like continue with the hero theme comic book themes. So are you and your family religious at all? Yes, yeah, group I hated church girl and yeah, you know, like we bounce. We move so much that I was always the new kid at church and they're. Very cliquey at Christian churches. I hate sorry, Christian churches. But yes, the churches I went to. And so I hated it and then got involved playing music lead worship was on staff at a church for while we're actually and I met was at a church. She was like setting up candles and I was playing in the band and then had multiple different political falling outs, I guess you would say in, so I've kind of been turned off, but if you've come back from my kids in Ashley, have really found a place that they love. I go to support them. Yeah, but I don't. I haven't found a place that really clicks. Honestly, you speak any other languages? Oh man. I understand a little bit of Spanish. My grandmother wouldn't allowed in the house like our family is Spanish and Ashley side of the family is Colombian. And so her mom speaks fluent Spanish, but I never learned it. 'cause my grandmother thought the grand grit. My grandfather was talking about her hundred back. Have you ever had any surgeries in your life? Yes, multiple surgeries, lots. No. Happened being an athlete. I mean, like doesn't look like it now, but I was an athlete. I ran cross country and played basketball in college swam dog kind of stuff, play baseball forever. So I've got wrist elbow, shoulder ankle knee hand couple times. Yeah, knows spike. I've had been cut on a lot. Why did you decide to apply to adults react when that call the first casting call? Came up. The I was watching teens react to just know what the pulse was with kids, and I was like, you know what? I'm gonna take a shot. I had taken shots before like this with. I was emailing other musicians. I loved right, and they were missing band members and I'm like, hey, like, do you need someone like Ryan Cabrera? I don't know if you remember that John Ryan Cabrera. His manager was Jessica Simpson's dad, Joe Simpson, and I approached him at a club and he gave me his car and kale play drums for this kid. So I just took a chance. I even said like I. 'cause you the when you when you guys I posted it said southern California only. Right? And I was like, I'm not really, but I'm willing to drive. And then I didn't think anything was going to come of it. I told Ashley, I'm like, yeah, I didn't get a response. And then like a week later. You've been on ever since and I'll save it like you have been so incredibly kind to f. b. e. like you've you've written the company letters sometimes over the years and all of us when we get them, we feel very like, we should be thanking you for being on the show, not the other way around. So can you share a little bit of like, you know, because you just whatever you're you're, you're kind dude. I feel like there's you have such a big heart that is inspired me knowing you and knowing your family a little bit. So, but why does it mean so much to you having a voice and being part of what we do here to the point that you've multiple times written these letters to us about what it's meant to you? Gosh. When you have kids, you get emotional. I'm almost tearing up right now Tangy, very emotional person. So seriously, honestly, it's. To find a group of people like you guys is very unique and very special. So that's that's one of the reason for the letters. I feel like that's a lost way of expressing yourself. It's much more. I don't know focused on you than just text message and it's more personal. But why do I feel like it's important to to be here and things I feel like. As a parent, it's it's important to stay connected. It's important to understand what's going on in in the world and to show kids. I feel like kids nowadays have more role models that are their age almost in. Maybe if we had the big the kid, I know people love the elders and now the adults and hopefully they'll have the adults and they can look to us as some examples as well. And we're not perfect. I mean, that's that's not it by any stretch of the imagination, but like hopefully they might be able to glean something from what we say on here. But honestly, it's, it's the you guys are the kindest people ever like when I work it's it feels like a family and so like you just, I don't know when you come here. It's like a second home and I don't have time for, you know, like to go out and I'm not going clubbing doing all kinds of not. Yeah, right. I got three kids and all this, but in teaching in grading. But it's like it's like this extended family that I did. No, I needed. But now I'm glad I have, and that's that's the biggest part of it. You know, I still one of the things I love so much as just how much people who watch they wanna be on it, and I love that we've it's not possible to get everyone on it. But so many were at one point feeling that way, and we always believe in the future of content being that you need to feel like you're so connected to it, and we go even farther that, no, you literally can be cry. Yeah, we love that where it is now almost entirely made up of people who were fans because it is just about people and it's about anyone watching and it's about the people that happened to be on, and he kind of all represent everybody. And that's why the cast grows because we're trying to represent all types of people because it's so important. All right. So gotta we're running out of time gonna move over to questions from fans. So this is the one that I ask almost every episode because every time we ask for questions for people onto into questions. This always comes up. I don't know why, but they're very fascinated with first kisses. So what was your kid. Like I legitimate Kevin, kiss. Now's live your own kids. Yeah, because I was gonna say one time I was walking to the office to take the attendance in this upper greater grabbed me and kissed me in the hallway, but first legit kiss was last day of school. My junior year of high school, dude. I know. I know gonna make fun of it's alright. It's ok junior year of high school, watching the movie three musketeers with my buddy confused, Chris O'Donnell Kiefer Sutherland all for one one for all sting and Bryan Adams. Rod Stewart, heck. Yeah. And it was during that movie that was like first legit kiss and dude. Yeah, that was. Yeah, it was awesome. And what concerts have you been to or a selection because you probably the too many. So what's like when you think about great concerts? Give a few that we're like really great concerts Metallica a win what year it was lollapalooza the year they played lollapalooza year was ninety six. Oh, loaded. Come out. Load had just come out. Okay, so it was ninety six ninety seven yeah. Metallica Soundgarden oh my God. Soundgarden I did killing me. I, I got to an. I'm so glad that when temple of the dog was doing that tour, I went no account to see Chris Cornell, and it was so like just a few months before he died. But I'm so glad that I did Soundgarden where my all time favorite, their miserable on my list of people I wish gotten to see. Yeah, they were unbelievable, and then a bunch of acoustic dude. So Mark Broussard he'd be at the top Garth Brooks puts on amazing show. I'm sure he does saw him in ninety seven and then John Mayer and Jason Mraz. A lot of those shows Garth Brooks are Chris Gaines. Darth Brooks all the time. Chris Gaines those good call. Now you mentioned it but smokey at his specific question of wanting to know the the very first tattoos that was the stars, the stars? Yeah, it was this one actually that we've turned into captain America. If you're going to get tattoos map out what you want beforehand if worked out this in this case. But yeah, it was that that right side almost passed out moon child wants to know on a scale of one to ten, how hard is it not to laugh at the laugh challenge. Oh my gosh, it's over at ten. Pick such good videos at any time someone gets hurt or do you like those are the most? The ones that you're like? Oh my gosh, I can't. I wanna laugh so hard. It's why America's funniest home videos less at this long. Crotch shots. Let's questions from fans. It's an, it's a heavy from John. Is there a person or moment that you feel played the biggest role in who you are and where your life has gone? Is there something that stands out is like someone who helped you or a moment? And that's a heavier one. That is tough one. Gosh, a person or a moment. I think. This is this is this might seem minor, but it was one of those things where it makes me I've, I've always lacked self-confidence for a long time and it was seventh grade and I was in this Lang. This English class. In this teacher MRs Hamilton, she pulled me aside one day and she's like, hey, you should be in like the the gate class. And I was like, not failed the test I failed the test ever since kindergarten. Right? And she's like, no, you really need to be in that in. She went to the principal on fought for me to be in this class and he's like, well, he didn't pass the test, but she got me in this class and her faith in me. Even though I was like a fish out of water in that class, the kids were super. I mean, they're pompous too, but they were very bright and I felt just so out of place, but just having someone in your corner like that, that made a difference for me. And that's one of those reasons why I went into education to be a champion for those kids that might not. Feel wanted or have a voice in things like that. Just give these kids like, you know that little that little nudge that pushing up positive direction. I don't ever know what happened. MRs Hamilton that was down in vista, but she has no idea. The impact she made on me was huge. It's a, I'm sidetracking a little bit, but I saw the wants to be my neighbor documentary. Mr.. Rogers one, have you seen it have not. It's very, very good scared. I'm gonna cry, yo, you will. You will. But that was it's interesting that this fan asked that question because they had a moment in the documentary where they kind of just generally ask that because of this, the ethos of mister Rogers just like knowing that you are loved can help so much, and it was like he would say, take sixty seconds, just think about someone who helped you. And I was like part of the documentary, the moment that I feel like I've watched it then does the same thing. So it's very good documentary, highly recommended back to a few final questions. Is there a social issue right now, especially from your perspective as a teacher that you find yourself. Most passionate about. Social issue that I'm most passionate about. I don't know, dude that something there's nothing really stands out right now. I mean, like it really is, I would say it's mental awareness like the mental awareness. I'm saying that wrong. Just mental health? Like honestly, with our students in our kids, I think mental health awareness. That's what I was trying to say is probably the biggest issue that's that I'm coming to grips with and dealing with, and that's, that's a tough one. And what would you say is like a highlight memory with your family? Something that just a good time. Oh, my gosh. I think anytime we're ever at the beach together, like honestly, whenever we're just everything is put away and we're just like. Running out in the ocean, that kind of thing. And then Knott's berry farm last summer. We were at Notts last summer, good ties, dude. It was just so much fun. Like the kids were just had a blast. We haven't experienced Disneyland yet with them and so they that was their, you know, their big amusement park moment. So that was not. I, I don't know about that. I know. I know. I know I'm not sure about that decision that we had a deal. It was expensive. What something you wish you could tell yourself? Like eighteen year old Scott. What do you wish you could tell them. To travel more like go out, enjoy yourself. You know, I think that I was in this rut of go to college, get a career, get married, do this do that? And I wouldn't change the marriage in the kids in any of that for for the world. But I didn't really take a lot of time to the, you know, cliche like find myself. Sure. I just I was just going in. I was following orders and I wish I would've taken more time to just go out and do whatever I wanted instead of just like being stuck in that. Yeah. So that's all we've got. Sweating. But I do and the episodes flipping it. And you can ask me question because I've been asking you so many questions. So ask me anything. It's so tired because like I was, you know, I was watching and Tori. Ask the story, ask the like, why did you pick me kind of thing? I've always wondered that like out of everybody like, I don't even know what, but my question for you is top three favorite toys from your child? It's a good one. I don't know the how much you know how much I collect things like. Is there an address where people can send you up to collect. Oh, man. I was thinking about, I'm like, you know, we're kinda like around the say, yeah, and I was like, dude, I want to know what his top few toys word. Five, if you. Yeah, it's so tough. I'm going to. I'm going to go into like sections of toys because it wouldn't necessarily be an individual one. Gotcha. But I would say that three and three quarter inch GI Joes then it would be I was so into professional wrestling when I was really young. Okay. And I've started getting back into it lately because it's just been kind of fun, but it was really into it like aids like eight to fifteen. So can parents that would just buy your kids. You know this now it's so many wrestling toys. So there's a lot of a big place in my heart for like the original Hasbro line of WWF at the time. No, those were l. j. n. I did have some of those and I did love them to than they get. They get all these marks hit them together, but they became about this is plastic, and there was a run of them. The first few years of them that went through and always and like most wrestlers they all die. So young and it's something not talked about enough. But Mr.. Perfect is my favorite wrestler. So my Mr. perfect Hasbro toy, high high high high up, and then man, I loved these, the battle beasts. You know what those were. That sounds so familiar. They were very small, very small like this big different creatures. Okay. But in the middle, you can run your hand across it news either firewater or whatever it was like a little hologram. Oh my gosh, UK. So I loved these battle beasts, a whole bunch of them. But like there was a snake one that I loved a lot, but the battle beasts. Saw commercials will be battle totally bringing back so many memories. Oh, you you ever food fighters? Oh yeah. Chocolate chip cookie. I had the French fries. Love those peanut with Harvey how well I mask where those remember those ask thunder cats and he man, I still have all those. He man was. There's an incredible picture of me and Rafy where we're so young as he meant would have been my extreme young jokin today though I love team, but my parents bought us across crash, grace, skull, amazingly, and there's this. There's this picture of me and Rafy with castle grits gone all of our toys around and it looks like my hand is like up and it looks like I'm directing him to like make a story with the toys, and there's a picture of us that like encapsulates her whole life as we're best friends were playing with toys. I'm telling them what I'm telling him to create a story and it's like this perfect picture pretty pretty amazing. That was a great question. Okay. Have you watched toys that made us on Netflix? Yes. Okay. Yes. Yes, it's phenomenal. Oh my gosh, phenomenal. Phenomenal too. That was good. Yeah, good stuff. I, we can do a whole hour job. For sure. Well, thank you so much for joining us here on too many questions. What we got to know Scott, a little bit more all the links to follow him, including his YouTube channel will be into the man. You could check out his progress there and Scott, just thank you for just being yourself and being so open and send my best all your family for sure. And we will see you on the shows because you're always here. This is amazing. So thanks for watching. We'll see you next time until any questions by.

Scott Scott Fresno California John Mayer Twitter Ashley America Lucy Jason Mraz Scott Matthew Oregon Matthew Laureus fresno MRs Hamilton Benny fine Parisi Ryan Cabrera Bakersfield Laguna
LadyGang QUICKIE: Tonight We're Gonna Reflect Like It's 2019!

LadyGang

00:00 sec | 2 years ago

LadyGang QUICKIE: Tonight We're Gonna Reflect Like It's 2019!

"Hey, guys. It's your lady gang Jack Vanik Kelsey night. And Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on itunes, and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for for route. So I'm pretty chill person most of the time, but I do have this looming anxiety a lot of times, and it's been very hard for me to curb it when I start to get an anxiety attack. So my new New Year's resolution is to really figure out how to get a hold on that and how I'm gonna do it is with cannabis products. And where am I going to get them from is madman because I truly don't really trust any other places to buy cannabis products that I trust the first time, I went into their store, I was super nervous, and I didn't really know anything about cannabis, and they had the most friendly staff that is so knowledgeable and the also now have in house pharmacists. So you know, that you're getting people that know what they're talking about it. So if you're looking to get fit, they have amazing edibles that'll get you super energized for your Ryan or CBD pain sticks. Your muscles are sore. And like I said they have amazing products for anxiety and stress as well. So if you guys want to check out madman in two thousand nineteen user code leading at checkout for ten percent off your first order again. That's when you check out see the word lady, gang and get ten percent off your first purchase, terms and conditions apply. Keep out of reach of children for use only by adults twenty one years and older. Podcast one presents the lady gang. The Hollywood girl posse with lady gang quickey. Here's Kelty night. Becca Tobin and Jack Vanik let's make this quick. Hello. Hello. And welcome to the late again. Quickey? I am Becca here. Healthy guys. Why are you guys ready for New Year's quote? Yeah. Okay. It's time because we're starting off twenty nineteen with a big nice beginning. Not that. I thought. Okay. Randy you always know that we're going to start recording these you should find. I know she's all up in our asses to start recording. And then she takes a million years to get healthy literally for the past five minutes. She's like, I guess I'll just sit here loan in to nothing, then I guess you could have found your quote that you've bookmarked. Okay. Are you ready? Yes. This is. Oh, sorry. Why are he says, okay? It's so many complaints about the dogs Dale away. Now, we do ready. Brave girl. Promise me, you will not shrink yourself in order to make others feel comfortable that wants for you shackling actually kind of like that one. You do tell me why let's get into it. Let's unpack this. I like when motivational quotes, are inspirational quotes aren't to metaphorical. So something you can just take him. Be like, okay. Have you ever shrunk yourself to fit in with other losers? Yeah. Of course, I am the loser. People shrink down four. That's not true. I'm pretty sure on ninety nine percent. That's the way that works shrunk myself down for like all of my twenty s and then I was like well this, and that's why I only have like five FRANZ now. Yeah. And you're like cut the bullshit cut it out that. Okay. Oh my God. We're already starting out. I'm trying to be more positive, you know, and accepting and nice twenty nine till it's gonna. To be a good year for me, you guys. Okay today when we come back what I'm so excited about this. So I'll tell you a little bit of a story. And then we'll come back. So every year this is well, okay. Can't talk. Okay. So way, we will be back in twenty ten I moved to Los Angeles. And I was living up the street from Christina Perri who has already living here, and it was like close to New Year's, and we were sort of hanging out on my verandah of my shitty apartment that I shared with two people, and we're both like I'd kind of recently retired from dancing, and she her music career is like doing nothing and genuine played any shows or anything, and we're both like what the hell are we doing with our lives? We looked out. So the capital records building. And we're like we should write a letter to the universe in like, really set our intention. So that year the first ever letter to the universe. I wrote like quit DIKO get bangs like stop waiting. Stay stop dating. And Christina was like she went in. She liked what balsa while it was like play three shows meet Jason Miranda's get a record deal like really lofty goals that at the time. We're looking at each other like oh thunder for comes true global. You'll ever meet Jason Morad. I'll never meet Jeeva we ever diet coke. Yeah. Exactly. So then we hung them up on our mirrors. And we looked at them everyday for the year. And it was the year that Christina recorded jar of hearts, and I gave it to my friend Stacy Tuckey who was a Kroger for she used it on. So you think you can dance it went to number one that night that was back when like that many people were watching. So you thinking ads Christina signed a record deal. She played like three hundred shows she met Jason Mraz flew to London wrote songs with him thought. She maybe maybe it was a love with him for like a second. And that was like, I don't even like, I don't even want Jason. Whereas like he was like the most amazing year. So everything on her list happened like it was I remember the for summer eating sushi together, and like I was teaching dance. So I had a little bit more money, and I would always buy lunch. And she was like I've got this because she had gotten this like record advance from Atlantic. And it all gets deposited into your Bank account like one day to go from having like minus twenty dollars to legs zero zero zero. There's like crazy anyway. So then from. Then on we were like, we always have these letters to the universe. So for the last decade every end of the year. I write this list soda, she? And we always no matter where we are in the world, or where we've been in our friendship, like sometimes some years, our friendship has been stronger than other years, we always send each other this thing. So last year I made the goal of that I really wanted to be on entertainment tonight came true. And I really wanted us to have a television show, and it also came true. There's some things on my list that did not come true. But every year I like to write this list. So I know you guys think this is bunk. But I put some categories together of things that we could manifest, and I thought we could talk about our manifestations of what we want for twenty nine hundred and everyone listening to this podcast can also like look at these categories and kind of think about what they want to manifest, and we can do a group late again manifest for the. Okay, great. When we come back. We all know that Walt DisneyWorld is the perfect escape when you're a kid. But now as an adult unit you can experience while DisneyWorld in an entirely new way from. The excitement of after hours events to cool drinking options, which I love. Now's the time to find your happy place at Walt DisneyWorld you can discover a side of Disney that you've never seen including foodie dining, which I also love unique shopping and other magical experiences at Disney springs, you can indulge in seasonal events throughout the year. Like Epcot international festival the arts and Epcot international flower and garden festival. Relive the nostalgia of Disney or create some new memories. There's so many cool tractions and characters that bring your childhood to life and new experiences that you can appreciate even more as an adult. You can enjoy classic attractions you loved as a kid like space mountain, which was my fav-. Magic kingdom and test track at Epcot conquer that mountain trifecta of space mountain splash mountain and big thunder mountain. Magic kingdom again. And you can even take an up up a notch and add on expedition Everest at Disney's animal kingdom, so go check out Walt Disney World and live your best life, all your friends at podcast one. Thank you for a wonder. Twenty eighteen and we hope twenty nineteen is even better hates Adam parole up. This is Heather Dubrow from Heather grows world, HD balls from Steve Joel. Hey, this rob Riggle Sarah Tian from eagles picks. This is Kaitlyn bristowe from off the vine. This is Kelsey from the lady gang. Happy new year from podcast. The lady gag so the categories are. I just want to give them because some of them might overlap love self-care money business home family, something silly like for me, grow banks or get things or grow my hair health, which is not the same as self care and travel. You didn't have career on there. That's business. Okay. But yeah career we could do business career business and career separately. Notice this. It's it is the same businesses like late again business. But I thought that was too one sided so not everyone has a business. So what do you guys want to start with we start at the bottom travel? That's an easy one travel, whereas one place that you'd like to visit this year. I want to go to Thailand because I had a very tumultuous situation happened about a trip about going through. And it never happened. So I'd like to finally make the happen for me because no one ever been. No, I've never been you really thrive over thrive in Thailand. Thailand bali. But yeah, I want to because I had such a bad taste in my mouth from like a situation that happened with it that would like to reset it and go on my own terms. I love that. Nice. This is gonna sound stupid. But that's the thing here lists it. Nothing is too stupid. My travel goal is to only get on an airplane unless I'm if I'm truly passionate about what's coming. Oh, sometimes I feel like I'm guilted into taking trips and feel like, yeah, I should do this. But what I find about myself is that even if it's the most amazing place in the world, if I'm not in a place to enjoy it like, here's the thing. That's probably TMI. But like our honeymoon. I was not in a space mentally in like with my career to be able to be like peace out two weeks. I'm going to go. It was a great time. Time. But I wish that I could actually take that trip. I was so stressed. I had like a panic attack on the plane 'cause I just was like we can't afford to be doing this right now. Like, what are we thinking? I need to be in LA getting a job like not like. So my goal for travel is just to make sure I'm doing it for the right reasons. What about Kelty I love that? I'm like jumping on this Iceland that everyone's doing oh. I to go. I know. But I I I know I really I slammed air I have felt strongly that my next vacation needed to be a beach vacation because I just need to go chill out. So I actually think I need to go see some nature. So I'm putting Iceland on my list for this year. I don't have any vacation days because I've used them up to shoot late again TV, but the block you know, what? Okay. What about health? Health. I would like to start working out for once in my life. Oh, what kind of work? You know? What if he did like plot is once a week? We'll see I used to work out like all the time. I used to be obsessed with going to the gym. I'd go for like two hours a day. But that's also when I was in a really like unhealthy mindset when it came to learn moderation. Yeah. That's the thing. It's like you don't have to go every day. Just go once a month. My best time is like when I was doing hot yoga because for me that was such like, a mental and emotional thing that I would go when I was feeling especially anxious are going through a hard time. So that's kind of like, my happy workout. Okay. And it's also very trying on your body. Yes. While I'm like, a really good workout. You know, they say aging is the loss of flexibility. That's how like the medical profession defined. It's not by like, your organs getting rotten or your wrinkles. It's like as you lose, mobility and flexibility. That's how they decide an age. So interesting for my health this year, I'm gonna quit diet coke. The just putting that on every year. Yeah. I just need to be healthier in general. Okay. That's not really how manifesting work's gotta like really visualize and saying, but I'm going to give you a passion this probably get back into yoga to okay because you were in it for then you went to berries. I did an alternating Mary's yoga. I did. Sure. Oh, if you ever gone to Moto, we talk I have I don't like Moto as much as I like core. Okay. We are not going together. Family. See mine, I know right away. I need to see my niece and nephew more. They're like their skit there. Little kids schedules are so filled that I do everything last minute because I don't know my schedule and by the time like, hey, can I see the kids tomorrow, it's like Saturday, and they're like, oh we have birthday parties all day like it's not impossible. But like they're at the age wiped should be having them over for sleepovers and closer to my niece and nephew fairly guilty. You there in Burbank. Oh my gosh. Oh, yeah. My family. My extended family is all over the country. But I mine is kind of similar in the sense that we have a family group chat that all of my cousins, you know, post pictures of their kids or whatever and a lot of the time. I let it kind of terrible. We'll have it on mute. That's the problem. I have it on mute, and that I miss all these things people are sending and then it's been too late for me to go back and read everything so I'd like to be more present. Because for me. It's like I'm not getting to Denver and Philly New York City, whatever that often does watch my family grow up. So a lot of it is like via digital anti deleted my Facebook. So I have no idea what's going on. So probably to be more present. I like that max. Yeah. I mean, I need to spend more time in Atlanta next year for sure this year, but the fan k what about home? I mean, I need to buy a house. Do you? I mean, I'd like to don't think you do know why there's no reason for you to buy a house Jack why because it's just a waste of money. Spent ten thousand dollars fixing my hole in my roof. It's a jumble goddamn money pit. I can't buy a house in the place at wanna live anyways. Exactly. Well, I don't know. I think you have to buy a home until you like right where you wanna be where you wanna be with who. Well, I wouldn't want to buy a home unless I was like with somebody that I could go on with because again, it's like I'm not gonna be able to buy a house and Brenna del ri-. Yeah. Exactly. That's not like the size of a bathroom. I'm going to complete my backyard renovation with an infrared sauna a hot tub and outdoor T V O because I want to be able to watch late again TV in my hot tub. And I want a lot of outdoor fountains. I can go in my backyard 'cause I live right by the one on one freeway, and it's very loud, and you can hear water, and then I can hear I haven't infrared sauna that. I'm not used since I've lived there because it's missing apart. And I just. Or is it damn it? It's if you walk out the back door to you. Think I knew that you had that brand new puts never been can you fix that? I'll come over hard sauna get the part. It's like four hundred dollars. Okay. Let's do a few more podcasts. Sponsors about love. Oh, jesus. I had. Oh, no. I need to find a good guy. I think I did I always on a psychopath. My problem is like I've been so tainted from my past like, even your taint. No. Did they say taint I've been so tainted is that even the right way of using that were? Yeah. Yeah. Tainted love, but like everybody's been scorned in from their touch my baby Tang. Tang. But it's hard for me like even dating like such a wonderful person. There are so many thoughts in my head that I'm like, am I still being duped? Like, how can I trust this person with somebody that I've known for like ten years still I get terrified about it? So I guess maybe like what that's the thing that me up. The most about men is that usually the most charming ones are the worst, humans are the absolute I I know from experience, you know, this. Yeah. No. But it's I don't know. So I think for me is letting my guard down a bit if I can trust somebody like to find that person. A nice, man. And maybe you just need to tell the person that you're dating like, listen, I'm going to do things like go through your phone, and I'm gonna ask to see your Email because I'm scarred. And I I don't even it's not even like, I've never like intention its intention, and it's almost like my own self doubt my own instincts. If you had gone through voldemort things, you would have seen the truth. That's the thing. I never did. You need to do that. Yeah. You need to do that. I went through Chris's phone for the first year, we dated because I was so scarred. Really see I don't I don't with him. I don't feel like like I need to. But maybe I need to. I don't probably I don't think that you do need to. I don't. I don't think there's not. Yeah. You know, what are you gonna live with literally be like love letters written to me? So I know won't you feel good. When you find those probably we're giving her the worst advice ever. We are. That's why we're on the lady gang becka. What's yours? I just. Love. To not get worse than it is. Wow. It is January third, ladies and gentlemen. I mean, not that. It's not bad. But like I feel like there's a steady decline each year. You're married. I'm happy with where we are. Yeah. I just want to keep it consistent this. Yeah. I probably need to have sex more often with my husband me to who doesn't ever. It's never enough though. I know never enough never enough. I was laying in bed with Chris the other night, and he was listening to old voice messages that I had left him. And then he saves and I was like, so cute. It was like four years ago. And I was like, hey, Chris. It's your birthday. It's your beautiful wife calling to say, I love you why. Because you're so special Ivan left a voicemail like that in like five years. So I was so nice. And like, I just think like, I really not a great wife. So I wanna like not on my thing. I'm not good. I'd like fin kind do a really good thing. If I'm like, hey, when you're on the way home, I'll put some dinner in the oven for you. My question is did you used to be like super sappy and sentimental because like I am the the biggest sappy sentimental person. And then the guy that I'm dating also is and I wonder like does that just fade when you have are with each other just get lazy? It's like, it's you're always like that. They're not a priority anymore. It's half fight for who. I have two hours to write you a card. No, I don't even get you a card in the same anniversary card in my desk drawer for like years. Yeah. Two years. Yeah. That I've just not written him a card any at all yet. Who years, exactly? So think you just kinda now I feel like I'm superstitious about it. Like, I'm not going to. Chris CDs like way for stay dating. You give me like a mix CDs. Okay. But like, I'm more nine more. Okay. What about self care? This one's important health care. Philip. I'm pretty good at this one. Get more green scrubs. Yeah. I'm great at this one. Okay. I think for myself care probably has become more being. Yeah. Which I think that I've done this year like a really have especially for our TV show like somehow the effect of our TV show on my like self image is that threat. We're body image. Whatever is probably reverse of what it usually happens to people that go on TV. You're like, so you think you're pretty I won't. No, I don't. But I like don't cry every time I see myself on camera. Like, I don't know if I've talked about this on the podcast, but I went to go see your media coach. Yeah. Before you have. And we did this is before we started filming the TV show because in my head. I'm like, I there's some weird like part of my body just Warfield that I had this reaction when I see myself on video, the I burst into tears, and like, I think I look my face is melting off. So as doing this thing with your media coach. Suzanne. And that's what happened like when I was in there with her something's wrong with me. But once for some reason wants the show was on air, Mike, there's something about like not having any control over it that Mike it is what it is. Can't do anything about it. And also, it's like, I think with Instagram and everything it's so you try to perfect everything you put out there. So when somebody else's the one that's putting it out there. I'm like, oh, well, so far so good on the show, and you look gorgeous, and you should feel really proud of yourself like two thousand eighteen was the year of like TV debut. Also, we're really lucky that we get to like choose how we do our hair in our makeup. Yup. Like that's a big difference too. Right. Dressing. No one's dressing you. And no one's like you do class. Somebody who's dressing really threw me for. Oh, I bet. I bet to self care for me. I am going to try to go out into nature more often because I am a homebody, and I will really sit at home like if I don't have to leave my house, I won't for like three days. So I wanna try to like take a walk with. Yeah. With like the dog and just like hike on the weekends. If I ever have spare time, I just want to like get out into nature. I think it's going to be this is like twenty nine hundred a year of nature. I think it's gonna be really good on my soul to just like see some trees and some sun. That's what the tarot card reader told you to do. Oh, yeah. You're right. You gotta do some barefoot walk in the energy of the guitar around. You know, what I get pissed about every year that I live in California. And I never go to the beach. Never I've been to the beach twice since I've really you. I still going off. And I'm literally live on the water. We need to go to the beach together. Okay, or discount the beach together. Okay. Money. I'm going to delete all my shopping apps. Oh god. Because I have this thing where when my life is out of control. I think that I can like like what do I do at night? When I I'm calming down online shopping on real real. And then I and then I'm on Nordstrom. And then I'm on revolve. And I'm just like, I don't need any more stuff. I knew nothing really helped me with shopping. I did a whole year where my resolution was to not buy clothing. And how was it amazing? And I swear to God, I still even now that I allow myself to do it. I don't do it that often. 'cause I realized that I could go whole year. I think there was like one occasion that I like had a black tie something. And I didn't actually have something in my closet, and it wasn't something. I could borrow it was one like I would only let myself do it. If I was stuck. I absolutely needed something. And it was I cured 'cause I date so yeah. But this was before oh the debt was based. Just paying for lighthouse. Yeah. And like the house and renovations it was on my manifest list last year to do no personal shopping and I lasted like six weeks. And then I went back. Do you think we should try? I think we should also you can also do a no spend month like they say like, no, spend February and no spend November. So it's like you just do one month as a goal them doing that all the time. Yeah. Okay. Okay. We're almost out of time. Let's do a silly. So. Have did, you know before we run out of time that I did make a manifest list for this year for two thousand eighteen and I made inspired by me. It was really cute and had all these little illustrations on it. Yeah. So if you want an Australian manifest list, that's actually cute. Okay. But what was on yours reposted unscramble that a lot of it like had like money like specific like dollar amounts. That's like tacky. Yeah. But it was like certain goals for my clothing line, which did not hit because they didn't have a website for like three months leading TV show yet number of subscribers for my other podcasts. Oh, I'll make more international trips did not hit it because we've been Bill Maher show. Self care is just like it was a lot of like basic stuff and a lot of money driven like goal stuff. But I did make one I love it. I don't think ever told you about it beca. You have a silly. Really? I can't I really can't get my car fixed. Finally. Oh, okay. That's really silly. I would like to you know, I always have one that has about my hair. Yeah. Wait, I wanna stop texting and driving. Oh, that's such a good one. That's very important too. But this isn't silly mine is being more proactive about like fixing practical shit. So like, for example, the bluetooth has been in my car for like three months, and I keep putting it off putting it off and like with returns out we'll keep putting them off and then the return window closes, and then I'm stuck with a nightstand. That it didn't want so being more practical with duck with the nightstand. I've been I'm on like my fourth nightstand. But I need to be more proactive with practical shit and not let stuff side by I want to grow my bangs out. So that the same length is my hair good for you. That's it. Okay. On that note. I hope all of. Lady gang is so inspired. What are you going to do this year for love self-care money home family, something silly for health for travel? Think about it send us a text or GM or Twitter on our digits or digits, and we're so excited to hear for the lady gang resolutions. I love the so much. Thank you guys for humoring me. And we are so excited that you can follow us athlete a gang at beca Kelty at Jack Vanik, and we Nope. No not here for a long time here for a good time. Bye. Escalated quickly. Thanks for joining us on lady gang quickey. Check out new episodes of lady gang every Tuesday. And more quickies every Thursday on podcast one dot com. The podcast one app and apple podcasts. We hope you enjoyed this episode of the lady gang podcast, make sure to subscribe on itunes Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcast. We post new shows each Tuesday and Thursday in between keep in touch with us at the lady hang on, Twitter and Instagram and come on over to your Facebook page dust that old baby off and join our super secret Facebook group, just search the lady gang in groups and answer three trivia questions about us. So we know you are real member of the lady gang and not a bought and then you'll be in. You can also follow us to on our personal accounts. Mostly me at Kelty at Becca and at Jack Vanik, and if you really miss us been Dr TV show on the app or YouTube until we return to your TV sets on Sunday nights in March. And if you want late again merch wanna know about lady boxes or submit an Esa late again question head on over to our website the lady game dot com, and while you're there sign up for our Superfund newsletter. All right cenex time. AP radio news. I'm Tim Maguire the partial government shutdown over border issues, not likely to end until Friday at the very earliest Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell on the floor speech says the House Democratic plan to vote on funding eight shuttered departments. And continuing funding for the department of homeland security and the next month without an increase for President Trump's border law won't fly one partisan vote in the house. Tomorrow was not going to solve anything. I made it clear to the speaker. We're not interested in having show votes in the Senate. We're interested in bringing up something houses passed sixty senators we'll support and the president will sign. Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer accuses Republicans and the president of holding federal workers and the public hostile hope that they will not use the American people the millions who depend on these eight departments and the. Workers who are either not working or not getting paid as hostages to have a temper tantrum pound the table and say, it's our way. Well, we heard all these people the partial shutdown now in his twelve day has furloughed about four hundred thousand federal workers with a similar number working without pay an announcement made after the closer trade today is likely to have an impact when the markets open tomorrow. Warren Levinson explains apple CEO, Tim cook sent shareholders letter saying revenue for the fourth quarter will be around eighty four billion dollars well below the ninety one billion Wall Street had been expecting the biggest factor is a slowdown in the demand for new iphones, especially in China where the economy has been slowing and domestic brands are starting to capture some market share cook said the president's tariff war with China doesn't help although it hasn't directly affected apple yet company. Shares had already fallen by third since early October. They fell again in post.

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The Essential Pieces to Build & Launch a Successful Online Course - Thinkific's Greg Smith

Don't Keep Your Day Job

52:13 min | 6 months ago

The Essential Pieces to Build & Launch a Successful Online Course - Thinkific's Greg Smith

"What's the transformation or the change in someone's life? I WANNA give them as part of this course. That's what people are signing up. Believe that the opposite of depression it's not happiness. Its purpose believe that every single person has something unique to contribute to the world. And that's why I wanted to create a show called. Don't keep your day job. Don't keep your day job this about figuring out what it is you were your to do in this world that only you can do to make the world whole more beautiful to stop selling yourself short. Stop sitting it out to figure out how to take this thing love whether it's art or music for screen writing or dance baking. How you need this the Rav into a life that you get to contribute you get to do what you love full-time because it's not just about business it's about contribution it's about meaning that is what we seek. That is what we truly want. And you absolutely are here to serve a world and I want to help out. Just how much value have inside of you every single week. We're going be talking to people who have something to add to help you get out of your own way to help you be more successful to help the truth expression of you. My name is Cathy. Heller I'm so glad that you're here. Let's dive in thanks to purple for supporting. Don't keep your day job. Purple is an evolutionary mattress with its own patented technology go TO PURPLE DOT COM SLASH DREAM. Job Can use. Promo Code Dream Job for a limited time. Get One hundred fifty dollars off and April mattress or a fifteen hundred dollars or more. Hey Guys Kathy. Welcome back to episode of. Don't keep your day job. I was feeling a little sick this weekend and I gave myself permission to watch a movie and I chose an old movie. I hadn't seen in a while and I love it Jerry Maguire. Oh my God. Cameron grow incredible the writing the acting the music. That's the way it's GonNa be little darling will go ride in the horses. You're probably like what is that. Yeah that's a song by Rickie Lee Jones. That's in that movie. That was great and then I watched rocket man. I hadn't seen it. That was sad. Oh my God Elton John. I didn't know what he had been while but I love that scene or they recreate the video. I still stand in John then evident. The lack of news is really good. Wow what an incredible message so much hope to you. Know he's been sober now. Twenty eight years anyway. So did that and I also had a really conversation with my friend Laura Bell Gray because I was feeling really anxious and all worked up. I was like no. We gotta move thinking about moving. And she's like. Why do you have to move? Why do you have to leave? La Now telling her the reasons why and she's like Kath so much of this is not even real like all these things you're saying. Why would you leave for that reason or that reason and you guys I realize that sometimes our deepest oldest fears can be so sneaky and signposted. Yesterday on Instagram. She realized none of it was real and set yourself free and so I just invite you not to make decisions from a place of lack or fear but to always make decisions from a place of what lights you up. What makes you feel the most expansive your enthusiasm because it doesn't lead you astray. You know I was talking to Jason Mraz last week. I can't wait to air that episode. He's he's such a gem and he was saying the least practical thing you can do is do the things that you don't like right. The most practical thing you can do is do the things that make you feel like you're in a state of joy and it's so simple but it's so true. I'm excited about today's episode. Because a few years ago I gave myself permission even though I was really scared and I started my first online course and it was for songwriters. I was teaching songwriters how to break into the business of licensing their music to film and TV and that was the first endeavor that took me on to make seven figures and as a songwriter had been making a decent living three to four hundred thousand dollars a year but once I started teaching songwriters how to do what I was doing. Everything changed and then it was only after that that. I started a podcast and now I've gone on to teach so many other programs from podcasting courses now. I HAVE MY AMAZING COACHING PROGRAMS. As well which are sort of like high touch programs not so much courses but this version of course for sure and so today we have on someone who is really one of the most genius people in the world at helping people create their own courses. He's awesome his name is Greg Smith. And he's the CO founder of thinking. It's an amazing platform that entrepreneurs create market sell and deliver their own online courses. It's actually the platform that I use and I've used so many others and I'm telling you this is heads and shoulders above everything else. They have over. Forty thousand course creators. Over thirty million courses have been taken over. Three hundred million dollars have been earned through just this platform. It's pretty crazy but it really goes to show you how powerful Online Teaching Online Courses Online coaching programs. How much that can really generate in your business. And like I said we use them for everything and they did not pay me to say any of this. They're not sponsoring this. I just think that they're the best thing ever. I WanNa give them some love because their services incredible they go above and beyond the teaching tools that they have just our second to none and the customer service is amazing. And if any of your considering it right now is not a bad time to start utilizing your knowledge and and possibly that passion for helping people and turning that into an online program. Think about it. You don't have to rely on physical location to help other people to get results and it can become really solid revenue and allows you to be your own boss and create something. That's right in your own hands. He could do it over zoom and maybe it's the thing I mean for me it opened the gateway to so many other things I don't I'd ever have started a podcast. Had I not started the course I you just follow the Whisper. See where it leads. Greg has a ton of tactical tips to share in this conversation. You're definitely GONNA WANNA take some without further ado. Please welcome the Amazing Greg Smith Greg. Thank you so much for joining me today. Thank you copy. It's a pleasure to be here. I'm so happy to have you and we've been using fake and it's so great and for those of you who don't know what if again and you don't know who Greg Is. We're going to get into that right now. So why don't you tell us a little bit about where this all began for? Sure so I was going to law school and I started teaching and tutoring on the side to help cover tuition and pay off some of my student loans and so initially it was just you know five or ten people in a classroom for the weekend teaching them how to take the sat exam and then I was also doing some one on one tutoring and I just kept finding that every like I think so many of us where People WanNa pick our brain or We help them with things. Or we have a skill or a passion or knowledge or expertise. We want to share Everyone would come to me. And their first few hours of conversations or questions were always the same. Because they're all starting from very similar place so I put together a blog just to help them and put it out in the world ears all the stuff I always get asked and eventually that went turned into an online course and I was really lucky. My my roommate and brother. is a software developer or at the time remain Still brother use the software developer. So we we built it together so I built the course content and then he built the software to handle it but even having developer in house it was pretty painful to build it all and so that was sort of the first clue that there was something here where we could do a better job and make this easier for people. I mean we looked everywhere. I wanted something off the shelf software. That could just make it really easy to build my course put it on what I wanted. I wanted on my site with my brand. My course basically build my own business and then go and deliver these courses to people and couldn't find anything so we built our own and then pretty quickly that became quite successful to huge impact in a lot of students lives but the really cool thing is we started seeing other people reaching out to us saying. Hey can you build our course help us? Create solid course. That's how we started That was kind of the impetus behind building. Think if it was to help solve that problem for other people as well. And what year was that The course was up in two thousand five two thousand six. When I was in law school there was a lot of inbound infants from people looking to build their own stuff but we didn't actually get around to starting it until two thousand twelve so I went on to finish law school practiced as a lawyer And then eventually two thousand twelve. We started thinking. Gosh so explain to people who don't know how would you explain. What if it does right so It that problem that I had. Which is it makes it really easy for you to create your own course or courses or membership site where you can take your skill or knowledge or passion whether it's in you know a hobby or fitness or business or or any area where you have some some skill or expertise you WANNA share with people and then build a business around it or add it to your existing business we more and more. We see people even adding courses to their existing businesses but to get it up and running Easily where you don't have to be a software developer. You don't have to know when you can just self-serve jumping set it all up really quickly. We've got a whole team to help you here to get stuck on anything and then get it up and going and get it out there and build a business around teaching people what you love. Yeah it's so cool and it's just amazing. How like you're you don't even know at the time what you're really creating. What you were really creating eventually was this unbelievable rocket ship that helps other people. Teach the things that they have knowledge around. Let's talk about what that magic is because often we think oh. I need to know the fifteen stairs before I could even begin to take the first step and look what happened there. Yeah you're right. It's interesting as I certainly didn't look that far ahead early days. I mean creating the chorus it was. Let's just grab a little camera and start shooting some video in my living room. You know at the time. I didn't have a camera on my cellphone like we all do now but I still I see people now just picking up their cell phone and starting to shoot the course on that. I mean. Obviously you can. You can do more than that but I just got a camera. My living room started shooting videos teaching people what I wanted in fact even before that I was really just doing voice over powerpoint slides and then using mat to actually build out the course so starting with the tools I had on hand and going with it and building something out now we make a lot of that stuff a lot easier for people but but those days it was go buy a camera tripod shoot against my living room wall and what some voice over powerpoint slides and then the website around it and I actually think that that is. We're all the juices because to me any kind of sale any kind of learning any kind of connection. It's intimacy right so it's it's about creating real value and the real value is really. What's coming from you you know? And how you're creating that kind of back and forth you know communication and and your students really. It's not really about how fancy the video is And so I think that that's amazing. Though that you went ahead and created something and what I've also learned in my own journey. Is that for everything you do? There will be a line of people around the block. Who WanNa to know how you do what you do. And that's what's really fascinating and that's what I think makes it so that I think there's so many of us who have courses inside of us because if you're a potter if you're a candle maker if you are good at organizing homes for everything you do. There are people who WanNa know how you do it. So how do you explain what that was like for you that journey? Yeah it was I mean the the lawyer thing was I loved it. It was a ton of fun but then I saw this course starting eventually. The course was that it was always a side project. It was a hobby at work on it sort of a little bit of time on the weekend or after work or if I was on vacation and the chorus actually started to generate more revenue than my practice as a lawyer and I was working for one of the largest law firms. Doing you know. Ipo's and securities and capital markets law raising millions or billions of dollars for companies. But the course was doing more so that was sort of that first sign of wow there really is something here and then when everyone else started calling and saying or a bunch of other people calling and saying we want to do the same thing you're doing how did you do it. We actually started trying to do this for them. In a very Service oriented way. Like I'd go to someone's office and we'd film them and then I would edit the we'd put it into a call. That's a lie. I wouldn't even get on the phone for them and sell the course to company e places that I thought might WanNa buy their course so we were really just bootstrapping and and really Kinda scrappy and do whatever it takes to kind of make this happen and tested out and it was. We were a few years really before we got to the point of we should really go back to the original idea and kind of build a really simple to use thing that anyone can just jump in and do it themselves. Easily amazing well. Let's talk about that a little bit when you're talking to people about courses and you've gotten to see so many the staff that I've seen thank you. Fiqh are that you've had over forty thousand course creators on the platform with thirty million courses taken. I mean even one percent of that is is a lot right. That's a lot of success. So what do you think from where you sit? What do you see that makes course successful? It's interesting that often people think what topics are successful. And I know you know. That's not because you mentioned all these different areas of from everything from pottery through. I mean there's someone who's doing amazingly well teaching Hula hooping hearing that. Oh my God yeah like like a team and traveling the world and teaching Hula hooping. It's it's wild. Yeah so it really can be that any area of passion or interest that you have and like you said if there's something that you do well other people WanNa know how you do it so the topic can be all over the place. I think where people do really well is actually when they care a lot about the students and the learners and the results because you can throw thousands or millions into advertising and marketing but if you're not delivering a really amazing product and results for people. It tends to falter than example. I love to use his Netflix. I mean they spent two point nine billion on marketing last year. And you can do amazing things with that. But they spent fifteen billion on content. Because they know it's the delivery of degrade experience after you get that new customer that actually builds the whole business and makes it sustainable and and creates and way the Internet works now with testimonials and referrals. And is if you don't deliver that amazing value you don't really have a scalable business but do it's amazing how it can really take off. I love that you're saying that. And it's such a great example and Net flicks. So let's talk about. How do we do that? What have you seen that makes for a great user experience? What are the things that the excellent course creators are doing to make sure that their students walk? There is one of the first things I see. I'd say Sir there's four or five things I see people doing. The first one is really doing an amazing job of welcoming people in so once. That customer makes a choice to work with you. Whether it's you know signing up for something year giving away for free especially the transition point when they've put any money to work with you jumping on that opportunity because you really have this really small window of time where you can make an amazing first impression before someone pays. It's kind of considered marketing. And there's a bit of a question mark on trust there and but in those few moments after someone a few hours few days after someone puts their credit card down. There's this real opportunity to create an amazing first impression. So PC people even people teaching thousands of students where they're calling up most if not all of their students in that first day or that first week after they've murdered purchase and it might just be two or three minute phone call Or a quick video they send them But they're really making it an amazing. Welcome experience to say you appreciate. You took a chance on me. And you're GonNa work with me And it can also be a great way of learning because you can ask them. Hey why did you choose me all the people out there? Or what resonated with you and that'll help you refine and improve your program and your marketing. That's excellent and such a good point. It's like right. After people put their credit card down a lot of times like you said I mean you can just see this. So intuitively people spend all this energy on the launch the marketing now people are in and it's like crickets right and that's when people start to have buyer's remorse it's like oh where is everyone now. Oh now there's all these modules had to get through it. What is that second module even mean? Where's the homework now? I feel like I'm Outta here so a lot of times when people don't really welcome their class winds up happening is people want refunds right. But if you're if you're right there you know sorta like welcoming someone into your home reading them at the door making them feel like you care. You know you're happy they've arrived and you're GonNa make sure that they feel comfortable. Take off your glasses of wine. So what else? He said there were four or five things. What are a few of those other things? Yeah and I love. You said buyer's remorse because I think it's about turning it into buyers joy but the next thing I see is that that on boarding or giving them clarity so a lot of people across any demographic when they WANNA learn something. They're going to Google Youtube search engine. They're going to look. But when you do that you're in what's called sort of exploratory unguided learning and that's not as effective as having spirit animal or coach to guide you along and show the journey so. I like to say you know. Be What they signed up for. They didn't pay you to give an exploratory. Learning thing of you know. Here's a bunch of things learn at your leisure wherever you want and you know hunting pack and figure out what you want. Give them some guidance. So tell them where to go. I let them know what the end result is going to be. And how you're going to get them there and then start them on the path one step at a time and a lot of really good ways you can do it but the easiest is just saying. Here's where we're going to be going and here's where you need to start and so I find that's a really important thing and it can be as simple as sending them an email saying. Here's where I'm going to take you. This is what we've promised in our marketing and this is the transformation we're GONNA create. Step one start here step to then you're going to go here and just show them the first couple of steps in that journey and that makes feel a lot safer to pass. They made this purchase or they joined your your program and you're going to guide them there. Yeah I love that makes so much sense like it's simple but it's important but it also means that of course creator. You know what those things are. Take some time. Put some thought into it and say like if you're going from. A to B to see this. This is what we're doing and and that. I think and I WANNA ask you this as I'm GonNa put a pin in it but I wanna I wanNA come back to this because I think a lot of people then get overwhelmed like well. How can I be of course crater? Then I'm not a perfect course maker and I don't know what those steps aren't I think. Sometimes we over complicate the something super simple. Do you agree. Yes definitely yeah in fact when I do this what I start with is I just I take one piece of paper and I limit myself to one and I right at the top. What's the transformation or change in? Someone's life I wanNA give them as part of this course because that's what people are signing up for. They're not sending up to watch a bunch of videos or take your program. They're signing up for the change in their life promotion or weight loss or a new skill or ability or hobby. And then I just right. What steps did they need to go through on the piece of paper and I might break it down to a couple sub steps and that's it becomes sort of the basis of my teaching curriculum. That's really it I think so often. We don't realize that what people are buying is not a process. They're buying a result and so people will be like well. You know the launch didn't work. I said what did you do. Why told people you know. Sign up for this program. I'm gonNA teach you Algebra. I'm GonNa teach you addition of an it's hugh subtraction calculus but. What's the result? Oh well the result was. I walked up to be able to budget. I want them to have more freedom. They can take more trips because they can have a way of making their money work for them. It's like well then. Don't tell me in the process. Remain like just tell me what the result is. I think that people don't get that and what you just said is people are buying transformation and it can be very simple right like I'm GonNa you're gonNA. You'll be able to knit sweater for your daughter or something like that out of even better simpler the better. Yeah so going back to your last and then we have a lot more fun things to discuss but so we talked about. How important is to welcome people? We talked about how important it is. Just give them a sense. That here's where they're add. Here's where they're headed. What else is important? Another big one. I'm finding more and more is community is having some kind of community around your course or membership or brand and so can be symbols a facebook group we have communities now and so people can do it there but some way of welcoming people into your tribe of people who are participating and learning together and it can be a huge group of twenty thousand people or it could be a tiny group of two or three in fact I see people do both if they have a say a twenty thousand facebook group than they'll create many groups within that say. Here's your accountability buddies that you're going to work together but bringing people into some kind of community yet lead you that. I think that that's so much of what this is all about in. You just had accountability. But as we do we do a lot of stuff like that and we sort of take it to the next level we have different coaches that are assigned in our program to different people as well. I think the accountability and that peer pressure could be a positive pressure where people are just there to hold space and support you and keep you accountable and the studies show that if you're kept accountable you're so much more likely or ninety five percent more likely actually to get a result. You have accountability. Yeah it's very powerful. Yeah is there anything else you wanted to say about that before we move on you already given us a lot of what what you think makes a course work while the other two really cool things. I see just really quickly as is. I mean making sure that you're delivering the results that you promise are trying to get people. They're doing everything can To get those results. Because that's like I said really well at drives the whole virtuous circle here and then the last one is that is. I'm seeing a little more now. Not Enough of but I think it's super cool and it goes to that community pieces creating opportunity or space for your successful students or alumni or even people who are partway through to teach others and kind of become your ambassadors within your community to go and help and Sharon coach and train and teach others in that it them because they get to develop mastery what they've just learned from you but of course it benefits you and the whole community because now you've got this team of ambassadors who were out there Helping so it just creates value for everyone. I love what you're saying it it. It's so good and it's so true. I mean everything comes down to word of mouth everything so I love how there was such a through line in what you just said about. Please please invest in getting people the result because that ultimately is what's GonNa sell it for you the next time and you want people to just keep building and sharing upon what you're doing and then you really don't have to sell anything anymore. It's being sold for you. Everyone's like oh I did this and I got this result. Great you should do. It just makes sense. So let's go to the next thing. I feel like a lot of people listening right now. We're going to get into their head and they're gonNA get overwhelmed and say well. This all sounds pretty amazing. It sounds like Kathy. You know has made millions of dollars from courses and Greg's made tens and tens of millions of dollars of courses but I'm not like them and I don't know how to create a course and this feels like way out there and away out of reach and you were really kind before and said it could be really simple like is the result. Just helping. Someone did a sweater. I don't think that we think that whatever we know is enough. I think that we are convinced that in order for me to teach something I have to be the absolute best expert in the world. What are some examples? Maybe you could give of course creators that you've seen that have done really well who they're not the Dalai Lama. They're not the Messiah the very best person in an. How can you help us understand? That imposter syndrome is really holding us back. When there is also argued that we can share your. I love that. That topic to and You know just to clarify to on on talking. Some of those numbers is and how big this opportunity is is. Were I think a platform? We were serving a lot of course creators. But we're tiny piece of the market. I think we'll do. We'll see about three hundred to four hundred million dollars in courses sold through a platform this year but that number is doubling year-over-year so the the opportunity and the size of the market is amazing. And we're just a tiny piece of like I couldn't even say we own a percentage of the you're learning space. It's such a huge industry. So there's so much there for people and there are so many people flooding online that you're right you don't have to be the the preeminent expert in your field to go in and create a course and be successful with it but more importantly you don't have to be that amazing expert to add value right. In fact a lot of people are looking to learn from someone. I look for this and business. I'm not looking for to learn from the CEO who's twenty years ahead of me and hundred billion trillion dollar company. I'm looking to learn from the one who's a year or two ahead exactly is the billion dollar company which is sort of a next step. It's just a little bit ahead of us and so you really can jump in with the kind of things that people want to pick your brain over a coffee about say. Hey you're really good at this. I want to learn from you on this. So icy people in in all sorts of areas and again we talked about sort of those important steps that I see in in. Really great course creators. You don't need to do all those things You definitely not to do any or all of them. When you're getting started I think carrying about your customer and getting results is important. But there's no specific set of steps that you absolutely have to follow in order to be successful like. I said I see a lot of people that hula-hoop that was Deanne love. I think from HOOP LOVERS IN AUSTRALIA. And she literally just had her iphone in a park and was shooting herself hooping but that's how she got started and now she has a team and she's growing it I saw recently a Grad student who came out as a physical therapist just getting started her career launchers course and does one hundred and twenty thousand dollars in her first week of sales. So we're seeing all of these little stories of people who weren't confident that they were going to do as well as they did tried. It definitely didn't do everything perfect. The first time didn't have a super well produced course but got it out there. Got It in front of people and got great results out of it. So not every launch is like that my personal course. We put it up. I built the thing in thirty days because my brother gave me a deadline. He's like I know you're working hard but you've got thirty days before we launch this. We sold it for twenty nine dollars and I think we had ten sales in our first month so it was. You know less than three hundred dollars but it was ten sales. It was ten students saying. Thank you for the help and it was an indication that there was something there now. That course does maybe ten grand a month. But it's full autopilot. I haven't touched it in eight years. Yes so the opportunities are everywhere in the space to to jump on the. There's one I was talking to her. Recently Tiffany Alley Shea and she was working at a daycare. She had a lot of the parents coming in. I think in tough financial situations asking her for money. She said like. I can't give you money but I can give you advice on how to save and Budget and plan. And so she started just teaching the parents at the daycare and then eventually turn that into an online program and she was the one I was referring to earlier. Who has twenty thousand people in her community? Who have bought her programs are part of our community. She has these you know. Peer Mentor Groups Cam. But she's helped over twenty thousand families to better their financial situation and of course she's wildly successful as a business owner now because of that as well and has gone from being daycare. Worker to running your own online empire But she's also helping tens of thousands of these families to better budget plan for their future so pretty amazing story. 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It's like touching a cloud and I've been trying to get better sleep so having a purple mattress is definitely what I need if I wanNA show up and serve you as the most well rested. Energize version of myself experienced the next evolution of sleep go to purple dot com slash dream job and use. Promo Code Dream Job for a limited time. You'll get one hundred and fifty dollars off any purple mattress order a fifteen hundred dollars or more. That'S PURPLE DOT COM Slash Dream Job Promo Code Dream Job for one hundred and fifty dollars off any mattress order of fifteen hundred dollars or more terms apply. You know my very first launch. I didn't know what I was doing. I was pregnant with my third daughter had never seen a webinar never led a Webinar but I did my very first launch and it was you know how to you write music for film and TV. And the very hearse launch. I made one hundred. Forty seven thousand dollars. I couldn't believe it poorly. Wow and I did. I did think to myself who the heck am I to do this? There's got that imposter syndrome or you're thinking yeah the one to go and teach everyone that. I'm doing something with it but why me to teach everyone. Yeah and I I owned it for for a while actually because I thought oh other songwriters who are who are ahead of me are going to think. Why is she doing that okay? You know I'm the one who's you know I'm on tour? I'm like yeah but Taylor. Swift is in teaching this class and Okay so all teach it and you know we've had hundreds of students their songs have been on. Tv Grey's anatomy and commercials like McDonald's and eighty thousand dollars for an ad. I mean thank God thank God I pushed forward. Let's just go to one more piece of this when people tell me. I'm going to start an online course. I'm like awesome. That's so cool. I'm so glad that you're getting with the Times. That's so great. And then they tell me so. I'm just GONNA put it out there and I said Whoa wait a minute. You know if you build it. They don't come like you've gotta get like there's a few things that have to happen before you ever say. Hey here's a button to buy something. So can you help us walk through? What are those things that actually start to make a runway? So that when you go to offer your course there's some trust your some established relationship with some of the things that we should do ahead of time. Well I think there are so many different ways to approach this. You know. I've seen people where they go all out on the big law trade and they and that's often the people who've done it before they know how to do it but I have seen people where they put something together. They share it. They get a few people in they start to deliver results. And it's sort of a slow ongoing kind of virtuous cycle of I get results. You know they don't have one hundred thousand dollar launch in their first week or anything but they're getting out there and they're they're getting it in front and they're getting people they're getting results. So one way is to build the audience. I and start sharing content. That woman I referred to the physical therapist. She spent a year leading up to that week on just posting a couple of times a day on instagram. So it wasn't a a full-time thing by any stretch. But she was building an audience on Instagram. And she started from there. Then directing those people too. I believe a really really early. She didn't even have an email list a few weeks before her launch but she started building that list pretty quickly by directing people to some free resource capturing their email and then she started to build this small email list that she could actually launch to the other. Really cool thing. She did that. I see work well with a lot of people is to enlist the help of partners so finding others in your space figuring out who in your industry or space at your potential customers or students are following and trying to partner with them to see if they'd like to share it with their audience. That can be an amazing way to get. These things built quickly. But the other cool way I see people getting started is is sort of the the lean startup approach or pre-selling effectively or getting people to commit to sign up for your program. Well it's really still in its Beta phase. Where you're you're really testing and you're saying you get to be a part of the creation of this program and I think people are more and more accepting of that idea in fact there's some studies that show the value something more if they're part of the creation of it not even having a finished product than just saying. Would you like to sign up and pay? Here's what I'm GONNA teach you. Here's the transformation of the result. Get for you but you'll be part of the journey getting there so I've got the base curriculum here and I've got that first lesson and then we're going to do live webinars or we're going to hop on a group coaching call. But I'll get you there and help you get there but you're going to help me by giving me feedback along the way and making helping me make it better and that way you get to build it well actually generating some revenue and learn from people. Yeah I love that and I really want to pull apart what you're saying in in two sections because there's one place where you're not ready for a multi six-figure launch. Yeah you need to validate the course right. So there's two chunks. There's are you in the place where you've already validated the course. And now you know that if you're GONNA put this out there you don't want to just put it out there. You WanNa make sure that a lot of people by which means. There's things that you're going to do to create that runway but if you haven't yet validated this course if you haven't gotten results for one two three seven people yet then what you're saying is essential you can't you can't decide that you're going to now start doing all of this whatever. Your marketing strategy is when you. You have no clue if it's going to work for eight people right so what I I did. Just to make it Just give my own example. The very first thing I ever did when I was going to launch my six year. Songwriting class which is what it was called. Still call that is I had one songwriter. Come over to my house as a bring me a starbucks in exchange for starbucks. I'm going to teach you everything I know about writing a grown. Tv She's like. Oh thank God yes right. She comes over. I sit with her and then I I. I started sitting with a few more songwriters than they loved it and then I had ten people come over one afternoon on a Sunday and they came to my living room. I taught like a three hour workshop. I Times I then rented a theater nearby with fifty seats. It costs me about one hundred fifty bucks at the theater and that was a Tuesday morning when the theater was not using their theater. And I fifty songwriters come right And it just kind of grew from there until finally I was like I think I'm ready to put this out online. But that validation process was so great for me because at the end of every classes at what else did I not teach that you would have wanted to know. I never even told me that so I was sort of building the class by showing up in front of my people and saying what else what else. What and it's funny. You don't hear those stories. We hear about the launches but there's always work behind the scenes leading up to it to validate test. I mean even with my l. set course. I've been teaching in a classroom for a year before I went and put the course together and I've been tutoring people so I had that one one of what else. What are you struggling with? What else can I help with? And I think that it doesn't need to take a year but it can be very very simple and and really I think the core component which identifying with the starbucks and then the theater is are you willing to invest in this and it can be financial. I think that's the best way to really vowed if they're willing to put money down for you to teach them something. That's the best kind of positive reinforcement feedback you can get out but are you willing to invest your time effort and money in learning this from me and if you've got a few people saying yes to that that's usually a strong indication that there's something there and keep in mind. I was only getting often three to ten people to be in a classroom despite a ridiculous amount of marketing for my Elsa thing or a few people to do one on one tutoring but I knew when I went online one or two people in my community could mean thousands around the world so I sent I was just GonNa say that and so I love that you also just said it doesn't have to take a year it really doesn't like once. I met with a few people one on one a few weeks later. I was like you know what I'm going to invite people over. I think it could fit ten people in my old living on my old house so we did that it worked. I did that a second time and then I was like. Oh this work you know. I'm just going to rent this theater so in a matter of months Greg like. I had gone from a few people at my dining room table to a little workshop in my living room to a theater and then I said I think I'm GonNa put this out online and what you just said is exactly right. I then went into a completely cold audience of the world right. The world of humans who had identified themselves as songwriters which has many so with that. I was now ready and I wanted to do a big launch. I had validated it. We had had a couple of hundred people come through the theater and my house and they liked it and I had like kind of worked out what I was teaching or so I thought now it's so much more advanced than where it was but I was ready and so I thought okay. How am I going to do a big launch? And even that you know how long it took eight weeks. This is what I did. I had zero people on an email list zero. My baby was due in September. It was June. I said okay. I've got this summer to launch a class. So what I'm GonNa do is three simple things I said. I'm to create one Freebie one piece of content. That songwriters would would go. That's interesting right. That would be like a really good building block towards the course so I created a thing it was like turn remember. It was like the ten things you need to know to license. Your Music Film and TV was was cool. I like typed it on a word doc. Basically I set up my very first lead page which I was like. It was painstaking at first. Now it's so easy and you can learn it in a second but I didn't know what I was doing but I did. That and basically people could download this ten thing that you do for licensing music in exchange for their email address so I ran a facebook ad knowing nothing about baseball guys. I think I've spent fifty bucks and one thousand and forty people downloaded that thing so that worked and then after six weeks I sent those one thousand forty people an email saying that I was GonNa do a Class A webinar. I didn't know what I was doing. I was terrified. I had never used software before and I was. I was now eight months pregnant so I look cool at all. I love the additional time line of the pregnancy and birth. This whole thing that was like Schmidt saying I was like so hot like the summer. I'm I'm pregnant and I didn't have slides because I didn't know how to make them. It was just me talking to a camera and a few hundred people show up and at the end. I said I didn't have any smooth sales technique no slides instead. I'm going to offer my class and I just went out there on a limo. It's nine ninety. Seven thousand bucks. Can you believe that but I said it was going to be a year. That would co teach them for a year and I had created some classes where I was just. It was just audio like me just talking basically with nothing else no videos just me talking but I said that I would show up in a facebook. Group live for them. That was really. I guess the whole thing I was telling and I had the cart open for three weeks. I never do that now. I do everything so differently. Now but by the end of the three weeks one hundred forty seven people signed up. Wow that's amazing but now if I do a launch like the last launch we did in January for that same class we made one point two million dollars and we do it a little differently now souped up version the Tesla version. But you don't want to start there right. I couldn't. You can only be where you are no breakdown for me. What did I say? How can people understand? Because I'm sure you have a much more fancy way of explaining what I said. I mean we. We teach people as they join thinking of it. We've got all sorts of ways of teaching and coaching and guiding them to do different ways of either launching or doing all. My personal stuff has always actually been evergreen where I've never really done the big. Here's the launch closed the cart. I've actually just put it out there. Evergreen where it's all the time and I think it's it's different things for different industries and markets minds evergreen because people are writing the all set four times a year. So I guess I could do for launches but it's kind of thing when if someone wants to study for the sat tonight and Mike Cart is an opening for two weeks. They're just going to buy a competitor course because they're like. I've got this weekend book to study so I'm buying the course so depends different animal. Yeah definitely and I do think that the difference there is launches work really well where there's sort of a motivational component like fitness health weight. Loss that kind of thing is like a really great one where we all need sort of like a kick in the pants to do it so having that cart closer that deadline or that launch really helps get a whole bunch of people on board to to sign up for something whereas I think maybe making a sourdot. You've got a free Saturday afternoon. You Go Online. You find this hour coast. You WanNa buy it now. Because you're like I WANNA makes our to- tonight so sometimes it lends itself better to that evergreen thing but I think the key things that I'm taking away from what you're sharing is you really started with. Wanting to help people. In values he started with. Okay what can I give away for free here? That's really going to help people and You're running an ad but not just an ad to sell something. You're running an outright out of the gate of what can I give people that I can show them value? Start to build trust so you started with building trust. He started with building trust in giving them that checklist that they can get for free. Then your next invitation to continue to build trust is that Webinar and and it's funny because you say oh it wasn't super flashy and there were no slides but I actually think in a of ways that builds more trust and we even see more now with like instagram. Live like people with their instagram stories. And stuff is when. It's shot from a shaky phone. You know without super professional edited stuff. It's far more authentic and people trust that more so now they see you talking to cameron saying. Hey I I've done this I'm real. This isn't super polished. But I know what I'm talking about you've built a ton of trust and so then when you throw it out there. How about nine ninety seven for a year? Everybody wants to work with you so I think starting that way is you can always Polish it up and clean and test an iterative later but just starting of what can I give someone that will help them. And they'll see value right out of the gate. Usually some sort of free thing. It could be a free mini course. A free download make sure they get value. And that's something that's actually going to deliver value. Which usually means to? It shouldn't be something that's going to take them months to action. You want something. They can action really quickly and then from there continue to talk to them and build trust and work towards whether it's the evergreen sale or that big launch that's And I I love the era continuing to say it's not about how slick it is. It's about the realness of it and people can feel that and you could feel that those of you listening you know you know the difference so trust that trust that people they really want something that's honest and that matters more than all the bells and whistles and what I do now is like a five day challenge and it's basically like five webinars and really it's ten because there's like five days of the challenge and then the cart opens and then I come back for another five days and it's again no slides no scripts not for me for this girl. So happening is people go just spent ten days with this person and I really have a sense of who she is and remember. That sales is intimacy meant so if you can create intimacy and people go you know. I I know her now and I like her and I trust her and I'm feeling like whatever I've gotten out of this last few days is more than I expected and imagine where I would be if I stuck it out for a little bit longer. So it's really I mean. We scratched the surface today. But it really is a huge opportunity and when I think about the thing that does the best is my courses hands down so you got to look at courses you guys everyone of the House of course inside of you. It's what got me to quit my job as a lawyer and which I loved but got me into giving me the freedom to do whatever I wanted and so I'm sold okay. I'm sold to okay. Great so is there anything that you WANNA leave us with today. Yeah you know I just thinking about this and maybe going deeper on some of these topics. I'll put a few a few resources together to help people out who are thinking of getting started on courses and we can just look at how about a think if dot com slash day job? Does Day job work. Sure Yup so think of DOT com. That's T H I n KFI DOT COM Slash Day job. Great and we can put the link in the show notes as well. Thank you for taking all of this time so one day. I wanted to say it. If you're listening right now. Maybe do what Greg said he did before. Could everybody when you're done listening. Go take a sheet of paper or open a Google doc and like brain dump. What the heck would I teach? And then could you come up with something really simple and then figure out what would be the three steps to teach that maybe there. But it's a great place to start. Thank you for being here and thanks for creating such an awesome tool that my whole team loves thank you thank you so much. I really appreciate it. I Love Greg. I could talk to him about courses all day long. Okay here are the takeaways number. One start with the tools you have on hand. It doesn't need to be flashy does need to be perfect number two when you can deliver value than you have scalable business number three. Welcome your students in. Make an amazing first impression number four. Give clarity guidance. Tell them where to go. First what's the end result and how you're going to get them there. Start THEM ON THE PATH. One step at a time number five take out a piece of paper write down. What is the transformation? I WANNA give number six create community around your course number seven. You don't have to be an amazing expert. People would rather learn from a person who's just a couple steps ahead of them number eight. Just start with. What can I give someone that delivers value and will help them? Get the results when you can give value. That's when it takes off. Thank you guys so much for listening. It means the world to me. I know you have a million things you could be doing. We have so many awesome episodes lineup including the one. I just told you about as a sneak. Peek with Jason Mraz. So make sure you subscribe on Apple podcasts. Or wherever you listen and we are. Still giving away scholarships through the Star Program. If you haven't already done it go ahead. All you have to do is subscribe to the podcast. Go ahead and leave us a review and take a screen shot of the review and send it to us with the subject line star to hello it. Don't keep your day job dot com and then post about the podcast in your instagram or your facebook and tag a friend and say hey. I think you might really enjoy this. Every single month will be choosing to view. And we'll email you and let you know if you win and you'll be getting swag like don't keep your day job. We have these adorable hoodies and mugs. That say made to do this at heart of hero plus get a scholarship to my program. If you feel like this episode or any episode is inspiring you or bringing value to your life. Share it with the Fred. It really means the World S. It doesn't cost anything and you can then enter the star giveaway which might be super valuable for you. I love you guys. Alevi with a song of mine. I'll talk to you Thursday. The podcast is a production of Benthic for more INFO on advertising in this show visit authentic shows dot com Some cage came back starting Much no no. Nobody lives forever understand. Don't you'll miss. Every September with now is a sales MIRA.

Times Greg Smith facebook Cameron Google depression Rickie Lee Jones Jason Mraz Elton John Heller Cathy Jerry Maguire Laura Bell Gray Kath Netflix instagram AUSTRALIA software developer
Madison Prewett

Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

1:25:37 hr | 7 months ago

Madison Prewett

"Thank you for listening to this. Podcast one option available on spotify apple. Podcasts podcast one dot com in anywhere else you podcasts. This week's off the vine is sponsored by GEICO GO TO GEICO DOT COM. And in fifteen minutes you could be saving fifteen percent or more on car insurance money in your pocket. It just may be the most rewarding to do you do today human. Get Your Super Grape. Soft CHEWS AT SUPER GRAPES DOT com slash fine and get a free thirty day supply with your first purchase. Best fiends with over one hundred million downloads. This five star rated mobile puzzle game is a must play download best free on the apple APP store or Google play. That's friends without the our best means and listen to your heart the bachelor presents. Listen to your heart a six episode of Vent Mondays at eight PM Eastern Time Pacific Time on ABC podcast one presents off the vine with Kaitlyn. Bristowe take on his creating space. Girls Jenner Kim's feel empowered to be themselves get ready for lots of laugh topics unfiltered by and wine. Get ready to shake things up. Here's Caitlyn all right. Welcome to off the vine. I'm your host Kaitlyn Bristowe today on the pot. I'm getting a chance to sit down with someone. We all got to know on the most recent season of the bachelor. She made a huge impression on all of us from her insane basketball skills to her fun loving personality to her unexpected reunion with the bachelor himself after the season finale. I'm very excited to hear about her. Experience she She's trusting me so we're going to make this a good podcast and get to know her beyond what we saw on our TV screens. I'm a big believer in getting to know people beyond beyond edited. Tv show that. I love dearly so please welcome to the podcast. Madison Pruitt High Addison. I'm so happy to be here. I'm so excited. We're GONNA have a great time. We are going to have a great time. We're here over zoom. I wish we could do this in in person but this is life. Where are you quarantining warranty in life? I am quarantined in Auburn Alabama. All your home okay. That's not I'm home with the family. Thankfully so I have. I have been here because I am an extrovert so I would be struggling by myself right now. So are you really an extrovert. Oh one hundred percents. Oh See. That's so interesting because again you know someone from TV. And I bet you think I'm an extrovert. I'm not I mean I can be. I can adapt but like I think over the years I've actually switched. I used to be and now I feel like I'm more of an introvert. Which is so crazy. But in this quarantine arriving absolutely thriving I feel like I'm in my happy place. I can work from home. I could stay home with Jason and the dogs. I'm just like sleeping and just stay. I'm loving it I'm like okay. We're you know a couple of months and I'm ready for it to be done but I'm also I'm okay. I'm okay So obviously we have to get into regarding your season and thank you again for being open to talking to me about it but you really haven't spoken out much since the season. I mean usually. There's so much press to be done. Obviously it's different when two people are together and they go do the press together but usually you're able to speak to someone or some outlets or do something. So can you talk a bit about why you really haven't done any media? Yeah well first of all. Thank you so much for having me. I am really excited to be here in just share my heart and like you said a little bit more about me behind you know not not a TV screen. So yet. So I would say I. I don't know I came off of the finale end. A lot went down. Obviously as you as you got to see in so I don't know I kinda wanted to just time in just honestly take time myself in just focused on me and when I decided I wanted to kind of address some things in in speak out I wanted to be in a really good place inch Industry feeling feeling good feeling like myself again in so I would say that was kind of the main reason I didn't just kinda jumped the gun in star press immediately. I knew that there was just so much that it happened in stuff. I just wasn't ready to quite talk about yet. I think it's really important that you take time to yourself into process all of your emotions because a lot of people watch and think your character on TV when you're a real human being trying to navigate. The feelings of love heartbreak all things that are really really hard just as a human being let alone on national television so I think it's cool and important that you did that for yourself because if you're like me I totally react with emotion and not logic and if I give myself the time to process and work through things I can then speak with logic. Which is what people want to hear although emotion. That's fun and makes for good TV. But it's it's better to hear you know once you've had some time and you can really speak from your heart about all these things that you went through so. I love that you took time to yourself. I'm grateful that you were allowed to take time for yourself because a lot of times you know. Well it's in the contract and this is what you signed up for and that whole thing so I think it's important so I've so many questions like how did you even get on the show. This is a great question in question that I've been excited to address that I definitely gotten a lot and honestly I mean I felt that a lot. Just you know why you come on the show and all those things and I don't know that I have the most perfect answer for all but I actually you know I had a friend who signed me up for the show. I had just recently gotten out of like a four year relationship She signed up for the show in my December. Something like that I meant. I didn't get a call until April and I can. We got him out. I got him as a prank call. I had no what's happening on enact. I honestly I was like no. I'm not doing this autumn bites after really taking time to think about it in talk my family about it It was Kinda something I was like. You know what I'm GonNa keep walking through the doors on. Its open end until I get to the point where the ball's actually Mike Ordinary asked me to come on the show. Like I'm just GonNa keep taking steps word until I get there in the kind of what I'm feeling at that point and so I really took a long time to to think about it and it just was something I felt like I was supposed to do. I didn't know what it was like. I didn't know how we go. I didn't have it all thought through what it would you know. Like if I got this pointer whatever like I kinda just elegance this to go on the show and that I was supposed to meet Peter and for that reason. I am so grateful that I went and I have no regrets. I'm really glad that that I kinda got out of my comfort zone. In that way I think with my life a lot people my whole life have kind of put me in this box in there like Mattie in like this is how she's supposed to web in what she's supposed to do and this is how she supposed to find the love of her life in all these things and I'm someone I met Challenger so I am someone who likes to kind of light transcend the borders limitations in the boxes that people put me in. I'm and I like I really enjoyed getting out of my comfort zone in so for me. Just you know I. I'm down for love down for for growing. I'm down or adventure. So then you went on the right. Shell exactly grace. It's true it's hard when people tell you you know how you should do things and they think they know you but I. I'm a big believer in risk taking and stepping outside your comfort zone because again like you said growth it. It like opens doors. You never knew that would open for you and it's important to do those things and again like just because you're you know you're down for love. It doesn't mean it has to work you still experience those feelings of love. You still had all these opportunities and got to do something that you know that I will put all of my money on. That grew from right. Oh Gosh No I. That's something that I say having like. Yeah this show didn't end the way that I expected it to wanted it to and you know not so little that can be a little sad but also at the same time you know like I said I have no regrets. I can genuinely say like I'm a better person because of it. I'm stronger because of it and I have grown so much I feel like I learned so much about myself and about relationships about love and so for that. I'm I'm very very grateful. Of course yeah and I know you said just a few seconds ago that you didn't know what it was gonna look like going on the show p whenever people say you signed up for this will you don't know what you're signing up for your won't say no and so. I'm guessing like okay. You did some research before going on the show. You knew Peter was you. Did you watch him on B. Season so I never watched the show until Hannah be season when I was going through the process of talking with people about going on the show? I that Renault's like okay. I should probably won't. Nc here you know who who like some of these guys are and who could potentially bachelor. And so I did watch it and I and I and I love speed at night I was. I was hopeful that it was going to be Peter. Either I just like I don't know I saw something really special on him and just like Felt that I don't know I've felt like we were supposed to meet and I felt like yeah so I was excited when I got here. So the my next question then is You knew let's just say that. He was sexually active open about talking about that. Part of his life publicly Was that a concern heading into the season for you. You know I guess to me. I never saw. I never saw Peter as the windmill guy and I know a lot of people I know. A lot of people dead in a lot of people kind of put him in after getting to know him after having so many conversations in heart cohorts pretend. I guess to me it was. It was kind of heartbreaking that that was you know how a lot of people you'd him in in in that way because he is so much more than that end for me coming on the show for sure. That was something that we were different in by an. I didn't know I didn't know if it if it would work. Or if we would even click or be able to you know work through some of the differences by. I knew what I saw in him what I was attracted to on and that was you know someone who was a family guy. Someone who's ready to settle down someone who was venturous someone who was fun and outgoing and not afraid to wear his emotions on his. You know honest leading so for that reason. I was really really excited to to get to know him to get to go on at adventure them. Yeah I think the show likes to Colton was the virgin. Peter was the windmill guy. I was like slut shamed and it was a controversial thing about you know like that's the kind of stuff I guess that. Get ratings up so I mean you were open a on the show about being a virgin. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're not you need a guy that's virgin. It's just that's who you are so it's an important part of your life and you didn't end up sharing this with Peter until pretty far into the season and I think everyone wanted to know. Why did you decide to wait to share that with him? And the decision kind of process behind waiting and still like not fully going there here. Here's what I'll say about that. You know. I'll be the first to admit that I am not perfect and I was not perfect through the process. I didn't handle everything perfectly you know in in you know from being in non environment you know. You're you're in an environment like you've never been emotions emotions running high. There's pressure like you'd never felt you know there's cameras all around and you know it's it's just a high pressure high intensity environment and what. I can say is I. I truly kind tried to let my heart lead me in every situation every moment you know. I'm someone who I don't say things were were do things because I feel like it's what everybody else has done. How post to go or because people are telling me to or whatever you know so for me. I really tried to do the best. They could with the situation on his N. Just let my heart leading in those moments you know and opening up about something like saving myself for marriage and that that gift one day one a WanNa get to my husband. That is a very intimate. Invulnerable thing to to open up about it something. I'm extremely row above Mike so grateful for in my life but I but it's still something that's intimate you know to talk about and not something. I wasn't just discussing with Peter. I was inviting millions of people into that horrible place. And so you know I wanted to really feel it out and make sure I felt comfortable. I felt safe in the environment. It was the right time like it was the right moment to really go there in like I said I wasn't perfect and I probably should have shared it. I probably Shoulda shared it sooner in. Who knows if it would've made a difference you know? Of course. Of course he's going argue that it might have made a difference but I mean who knows because that wasn't a situation we were in? That wasn't what happens by again. You know I just truly tried to just let my heart lead me in all conversations in all moments and you know not not having people in the airtime me like you need to say this. Just doing what outright in doing what. I felt comfortable with in when I felt comfortable with sharing. It and I know a lot of people were like. Why didn't you say it outside of the hanger that night when get to know that you're not comfortable and that's a valid points about point in what I will say is out there for five minutes so it's not like we were? We were having another one on one day. You know it's not like it's a comfortable environment. He had just broken up with someone. That really meant a lot to him. You just walk away. He had just sent Chelsea home. You know someone really cared for deeply in. I could see how much it affected him in where he was an in mind. Mind frame and on top of that you know I was. I only had five minutes in a conversation. You know like I'm saving myself or marriage isn't something I wanted to rush or just throw out there and be like oh by the way just You know it's something like I said I. I wanted to feel the environment was right. That was a good time and he was in a good head space in. I was in a good head space in you know. We both felt comfortable in the moment. So that's kind of why I didn't then by as far as doing it even earlier like I said I probably should know I mean it actually makes sense. This is why love being able to podcasts. Because I'm like everything you said makes so much sense of course and what people don't know also or maybe they do talk so much about it is that you don't have a lot of time with this person so it's not like that's the thing you want to just dive into right off the bat like you want to build up your real connection and more important things and then bring that in one time gets closer to these overnight. Dates that you. You don't even know if you're GONNA make it to exactly it's like well. Why would I you know like I'm not going to tell you that? I'm uncomfortable with it. And then tell you you know all this stuff is like. GonNa make it that far and on top of that you know. I'd the very first one on one day and so that's obviously a conversation that I'm not going to share. They're very state. When we're like three days into this thing we're like don't even know anything about each other you know and then I. I don't know you know our second one on one day in Peru like that was the time where I really opened up about my faith and how important that was my expectations for marriage for relationships. I talked about my family. You know if he were to come to hometowns with me what that would look like. And then that's when he shared with me that he was falling in love with me and so I just. It wasn't really the IT's time to to get into that kind of a conversation. In so again I probably should have handled it differently but looking back at it now. I don't know that if the same situation was presented to me that I would because I feel like again I let my heart leaving in those moments in Go with what felt right for me. That's all you can do. That's literally all you can do. So you see you know. I mean don't guilt yourself feeling like you did something wrong. It's as long as you were leading with your heart literally. Nobody can fight you on that. Nobody no well of course but there idiots question for the vinyls. Do you own or rent your home. I'm sure you do and I know for a fact it can be hard work but you know it's easy is bundling policies with GEICO. Geico makes it easy to bundle your homeowner's or renter's insurance along with your auto policy and it's a good thing too because you already have so much to do around your home go to Geico Dot Com. Get a quote and see how much you could save. It's GEICO easy. Visit GEICO DOT com today. That's GEICO DOT com regardless of Peter himself. I know you know the format of the show and it involves overnight dates and of course with multiple women so what happened in the process that you lost comfort. Was it just simply the fact that you fell more in love them than you thought you were going to man? It is just like what you said. I mean there's no way of knowing what you're getting yourself into one of knowing how it's GonNa Affect you every single day like I was battling something different in I in my feelings growing stronger and stronger and you know outside of the hangar at night honestly I mean at that point. I knew that I was starting to fall for this guy and I know this is selfish and I know what the show is set up to do but I was like you know what. I'M NOT GONNA APOLOGIZE THAT. I don't want the person I want to be with to be with other women like I want it. I want you to myself. I mean I'm like I. I'm sorry I do wind to myself. I know that that salvation. I know the situation. We're in I probably you know are putting you in an uncomfortable position by by sharing that when he did ask us you know at the beginning to just be extremely honest into share our hearts with anything we were feeling just you know how bring communication is in relationships in. So that's all I was trying to do but yeah I mean it definitely I'm someone who actually I'm extremely analytical and logical so for me. The process was so difficult. Because I'm constantly in my head all the time and you know I told him on our very first one on one day. I'm like dude I take things slow in I over think things. I don't rush anything. I don't do anything because I feel like I'm supposed to you know when he told us lying in love with me. I didn't say back just because he said it to me like I wanted to. One hundred percent mean it and feel it and know it in so you know throughout the process. That was definitely difficult because I was constantly like you know. Even for hometown's I was like having to stop myself from thinking about. He's visiting three other families you know and so I was constantly in my head with all of that stuff in in just that week. I mean fantasy suite meek was literally the hardest week of my life and I. I mean there was one time in particular. I locked myself in. The bathroom was balling crying for hours. Because I was like I. I don't know if I can do this. This is the hardest thing ever. I WANNA be with this guy but I'm having like washing be with other people and so yeah I mean like you said it's just you can't expect you know the feelings that come up in how it how it all plays out your. There's just no and no matter if like okay for example when I was on the bachelor one of my very first one on one dates with Jimmy. Kimmel and Jimmy was like Caitlin. How you're gonNA feel when you know. Fantasy suites common. He's sleeping through other women and my answer. Was you got a test drive a car before you buy it but then once it got closer to that time. I was like Nah. I don't like this all those. Just my weird sense of humor like it because your feelings do develop a no matter how much you know the format the show or no matter how much you understand. What's going on or who he is in that he has a past. It still doesn't take away difficult feelings. That are real feelings as a human being once you fall in love right. Yeah absolutely and here's my other thing you had your first one on. One was literally meeting. His family would is the difference. What HAPPENED BETWEEN BARB? Then bar AD. That finale what the Heck Lake. It seemed like it was like okay well. She met Madison one that she's in with the family and all of a sudden. I mean we can get to that later. But the one on one date with with The vowel renewal was all like. Was it comfortable? Was it happy? Was It really what we saw in end so much more? I mean you only saw a very little bit of it but that day portion I mean it was literally like the best date ever like best eight. I've ever been on on this getting too. I mean there were people who were flown in from Cuba. His whole entire family and so getting to see you know like being part of such such a intimate impersonal day for family and then getting to me all of those important people to him like all of his friends all of his family. And then just getting to like. I thrive in this kind of art environmental. I'm an extrovert so I want and I talked with you because I was like I felt more comfortable than you totally swatting certain on like no no. It was so much finding me we dance. We did a lot of like their family traditions in just not to hang out with everybody in it was. I mean it was so much on the knife worsen I mean with? It's no arts concert seriously. Was the best stay ever. I mean I remember getting back journaling and being like I'm screwed helmet. I'm like I feel like known. This guy has been dating this guy like for so long and like because you know I felt like I went from like I'm not just the bachelor and not just like you know we're not just casually dating it's like it's not the entire family. I felt like we've been dating for year. Now's family Christmas. Yeah you I was like. Oh she's in like that's it that's it. You are part of the Webber family now like. That's what I thought from the get go and I think a lot of people did see that too which is so interesting that it was so you know happy and incredible and loving and and you know fast forward to the finale. So we saw you in Peter on the couch after the final rose. The entire like you know thing with. Barb was really directed how she felt about you in the relationship. So did you know about these feelings beforehand. And why did you choose to respond how you did in that moment not a logistically and honestly if I if I could go back That's the that's the one thing that if I could go back in that moment. I wish that I just would have just apologize in. Just been apologetic moment. I think I was so I was so taken back in our so. What are the things that were being said to me? In this time. That was so beautiful for me and Peter had just been through this entire season. We had overcome so much to be here. And we're trying to fight so hard we don't know if it's GonNa work but we're trying so hard to figure out if it can and for that opportunity to kind of be taken from the both of ice and to not really have a chance to explore that into figure that out in that moment in for that to be the ending of season I mean. I walked off that stage and I have never cried harder in my life. I just I felt I mean I was. I was so upset In like you said it's just like it's it's the person that I love mom in Stanley in so I guess for me. It's like in that moment. I just wish I would have been able to like so taken back. I don't think I could process everything but you know. I wish that I would've been able to process it a little bit a little bit faster in just to be able to say you know what I am. I am so sorry if there is anything that I did that upset you or did you or made made you feel the way that you feel like that was obviously never mind tension like I. I loved the Webber family. I mean the like you said that I one day. I mean literally. Every time I saw Peter and I know a lot of it didn't get shown throughout the show but every time we were together I mean he is talking about how much the same love me. And how much and. I was telling him like how much I loved. His family couldn't wait to see them again. I mean we were already talking about when we were a family again and I think what really upset. Her was just that time that they sat and waited in the. House for for while Peter and I were trying to figure our situation out and honestly like all I can say to. That is again. I'm sorry I can't imagine you know flying halfway across the world in you have an expectation of of what that week's supposed to look like I'm GonNa look like for your son and then you're in the house waiting for three hours and so I apologize but what I will say is you know I mean I came into that not knowing if Peter Night. We're GONNA make it past that conversation. I knew there was so much we needed to talk about an address and really. I mean to be frank in Nazi disrespectful to anyone but like I wasn't concerned about my family. His family or anybody else involved at that moment might only focus is on. Peter in I and just figuring out. Can we move forward? Is it worth fighting for You know can we move past everything that's happened in in you know This out in so. That was the three hour conversation. I didn't even realize it's not like I had a clock with me like I had no idea how long it was. You know we were so precision and you know and it was him to like it. It wasn't just me. It was him to him needing clarity with things as well and asking me questions in asking me you know why. Why did you decide to stay in? And can we work this out? And how do you feel about me in all of those things that he also you know needed? Clear clarity his well and so yeah I mean I I truly don't I truly don't know where the big disconnect wise but again I mean. I don't know I just someone who like. I'm always going to dislike apologize. If there's anything on my end that that I ever did so yeah I mean I'd say that now to even it's so crazy because I like the fact that you can't pinpoint a disconnect or where that were something went wrong is wild to me because of how great that I you know you literally meant all his family and loved his family and they loved you too. He could be engaged to you because you made them wait along with Peter. He made them wait as well that that that would be such an issue. You know what confuses me is that it's like okay Hannah and it's it was clear to all of us as viewers that his feelings to you stronger but that you know it was just easy with her with family so because things were a little bit challenging because you were a little bit more real with your feelings and everything moving forward what. Why was that a problem to them? You know like why was it a problem to everybody that you were trying to really take this seriously and get through this with everybody. I don't understand tall and that's the thing it's like. There isn't engagement in like three days. You know it was something that I was very very honest with Peter with his family and I told I told him like outside said look like with everything that's happened. I don't know at this point how I feel if this could work and if I even want this I definitely can't give you an engagement. I told him I know that that's what you came here for. So I don't want to be selfish into you. Know stay in. Take that away from you and he just I mean he was fighting so hard to say like. Don't leave I want you don't we don't we don't believe in in just asked me to go in there and to be honest this family in that they would respect that in honor that if I if I was just honest And and you know I. I don't know it's hard because I'm like I try. I tried to like to the best that I can try and see like the other side you know in like try and put myself in other people's shoes and I get it like they saw. Obviously how different we were in. You know just just that. I wasn't a hundred percent sure on. I'm sure that's not comforting to any mother. Took to hear about their son by. I was never trying to be disrespectful in any way. But just honest in exactly where it was ad in exactly. You know how how was feeling Yeah I don't know that all makes so much sense if you're a fan of my show you know. I like to take care of myself. I have a busy schedule but I stay active by writing my Peleton going on walks with the boys and just generally trying to keep busy and keep the ball moving. And that's why I'm excited to tell you about something I take every day. That helps me. Stay on top of my game and that's super grape soft. Choose from human. I absolutely love adding these into my daily routine because what one they taste good and that's very important but two. They also helped me feel more energetic and I love knowing that I'm doing something good for my health. Super Grape. 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And what was it just like too much for you to handle? It wasn't worth fighting for which is totally okay. Because sometimes it's not but what was that next. You know forty eight hours like for you guys man. Those next forty eight hours were were tough for sure I walked off that stage completely blindsided and hurt and like you said I mean I was bawling my eyes out and we were all blindsided. I was like what the Hell is going on. I can't imagine how you felt. I was I would say that. Challenger side came out. I was definitely frustrated. Definitely leading those around me know how frustrated I was and how that did not go as I expected or thought it would I would say you know I would say the biggest thing honestly with all of that because everyone's been Mike you know. That was the shortest relationship in history bachelor. But you know what I would say to that is is we came into the evening not together and we left that evening not together. I mean we we said in that moment like I love you and I wanNa see if this can work but we never said like we're in a relationship. We're doing this thing. I don't think people realize that. Yeah and people didn't realize that in that and that's the thing is like during that time at live like that was when I kind of wanted to get some clarity with some things I so like had to watch everything through that I hadn't seen and you know so needed Clarity with things. So did he. And so we were going to take that time to really talk some things out and figure things out but we didn't get that and so we walked off the stage. I mean we were in the same exact place that we were in before hand in so really after that. Then we were like okay. We'll I guess. Now we ourselves just to see you know like could this work. Let's be really honest. Let's talk through things and you know just see where we can go from here and we took a couple of days. You know we. It was a it was a long a conversation A lot of tears a lot of smiles a lot of every kind of emotion. A lot of back and forth. But we finally got to a place where you know we realized with everything. That's happened You know this isn't necessarily the best foundation to be starting a relationship on you know you want to start a relationship with trust. You WanNa start a relationship where you folks save any feel comfortable in you know. Just welcomed by that person by the people that they care about around them in. I didn't feel that way you know went settle. That was something. I was just extremely honest with In in you know how. The finale went definitely played a huge role in. Why didn't feel like it could work in his? You know his family means so much to him that I would never wanna be the reason that there's tension you know. And and he's you know the thing about Peter is he is he. Is someone who. He's GonNa fight for what he wants when he's not GonNa let like when he has his eyes on something like he. He's not gonNA like go of it until literally like everything is against him until the point where it's like okay like up when he tends to also like have a rose colored glasses on always see kind of like the the. Pradier side of things where this kind of where we did balance each other actually out very well. Because I'm very logical. I see you know the whole picture and just like I'm very realistic about it in so many conversations. I just you know I had to kind of be the one who was like being really logical about it but But we both came to a place where we understood by this this this isn't you know probably the best in so let's just you know. Choose to to walk away from this with nothing but love and respect for each other and I know that we genuinely gave it everything that we had in. You know that's something that I feel like. Not a lot of people got to see like the fullness of everything And how hard we really did. Fight in how hard and difficult it was on both ends and just all the things that we walked through In like when I when I went out to after Caceres came in the House I went out to L. A. to see him. You know what what a lot of people didn't get to see was I? I didn't go out there to say like I WANNA get together. Let's do this thing. I went out there with a lot of questions unlike. So why did you get engaged? Why why did you break off indies bit? Why didn't you come after me? After he broke up being gauged. Why are you sitting here in California? If you're still in love with me like I had. I had a lot of questions you know and if you knew it was me the whole time like why. Why did you choose to you? Know Treat The week the week while the way that you did and so I had a lot of questions for him and we ended that conversation. Just saying like there's no answer. Let's just take time to think about this and again and we went into finale kind of the same exact place not really knowing what we were going to do but yeah those next forty eight hours were were all over the place. A lot of highs lows. I can't even imagine because like what was the process like of when you did leave because I feel like we didn't see much of it or you know maybe I'm blanking but I don't really remember like seeing the why of you leaving and how what that process was like for you. All of a sudden it was like oh she's gone. I'm going to propose hand and then like it was such a weird transition. So what was that? Like leaving in your decision Man So I would say first of all like I when when? Peter told me the news that he had been intimate with the other women The reason I didn't choose to leave right in there was I had realized all in one day which this is just craziness of bachelor world. All in one day I had my highest in my lowest low in that day. I realized I've loved this guy and I wanted a future with him. And then also at the end of the day I had realized that the guy that I loved had chosen to be intimate with with other women and after I had expressed him how that would make me feel and you know ultimately what what it might lead to and so you know I think for me it was. It was an overwhelming sense of emotions and a lot of things to navigate through. I didn't want to make a rash decision in that moment and You know when we were standing out there in crying I know it showed probably like two minutes that we were out there for probably two hours. Is he holding me in Iowa hysterically crying? He was hysterical crying. He might have been crying harder than me. He had like snark coming out on. You know we. We were definitely very emotional. And just was the. Dow's the hard part is. Arnie was so frustrated with him. Because it was like you knew you're telling me you knew what you wanted in not was me but then you chose to do something else and then you're asking me to stay in. It's putting me in an uncomfortable position. You know it just. It was like a hard moment where I was like a little frustrated but I also didn't want to leave his arms and so it was like I was still torn with the emotions that I was feeling so I wanted to take time to think about it and I left that night. Going into the rose ceremony the next day. I wanted to see him before. The rose ceremony to talk things but time didn't allow and win the rose ceremony hit. I didn't know what I was going to do. I mean I truly didn't know if I if I should accept the rose if I should move forward not knowing you know how I l in in what I wanted to do. Like if the relationship could work in knowing winks there is no way. I could get engaged so I kind of was was a little torn. I don't know I just. I saw him and I saw at that rose ceremony he was he was shaking so hard and he couldn't even look me in the is key. I remember when he asked me. His head was down his heart. I could hear his heart beating standing there and he asked me to accept the rose and I was like man. I don't know like I love this. Guy. I WanNa give it everything I have just to see like I just I owe it to us. How far we've common how we feel for each other. You know just to have another conversation in see like could this go further you know. Can we make this work and so you know? The next time we were able to talk was at the meet the parents in outside of meet the parents in so that was when we had that time talking. I would say because of how that went in just like because of how. The finale went That was one of the biggest reasons that I that I did. Choose to walk away Ann Inaba just how it was handled in what was said but but also and. Here's the thing to like I. I don't I didn't disagree with our. I didn't disagree with some of the things she was saying like I. I saw all of the differences that she was pointing out as well In honestly agreed with them Humana. I don't think Peter and I were ever saying like no we're completely compatible. Pre make perfect sense. This is great like rate totally understood that we had that winglets two totally different lives in that we had different perspectives on things. But we knew what we out for each other. We knew how much loved character each other so for that we were let a call. My Gosh it's fine for this. Let's try and make this work But after yeah after meet the family injustice I don't know just the way that it kind of went and just the things that were said. I think I just I took. I took nine exit that night in in the next day to just really really think about it in a in pray about honestly just. Seila like okay. They are Kinda riot a little bit about some of these things than I know. I can't and I and I told his dad to like I remember. I had actually really good conversation with his dad and I was crying and I told him I said look like I love your son. I want the world for him like he deserves the world in. I want the best for him and you know. He deserves his happy ending. If I can't give that to him than I'm willing to like walk away and break my own heart so that he can. Do you know what he came there to find and In in so truly me walking away honestly to me I thought was more of a selfless act of me saying like I love you so much in an. I don't know that this could work. What you have a sure thing here. You know you have someone here is ready for you. Who can give you an engagement? Who Does love you so much in is an incredible girl and so and I had said throughout the entire process. If Peterson end up with me I want to end up with Hannah yet. And so she was one of my friends in the house. I trusted her. I loved her and so at that weight like I was like this. No they make more. They make more sense. They're great together. I don't know so I kind of that was my thought processes as I walked away and you know as I got home and had time to process it I was like man. Maybe I should like you know handled a little bit differently. And maybe it's because the whole time like we're having this conversation as I'm breaking up with enemy. He's sitting there saying like what I want like about like you don't understand I don't need the like run off in the sunset happily ever after like I love you like I want you and in so for that reason. I wish I would've maybe stayed to see what what could have happened. but again. I don't know I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. It works out exactly how it was supposed to but yeah I mean that that was definitely a difficult time in you could see how affected we both were after. You know that break up and I was bawling in the car for like hours in. He was wondering off in the desert with snakes. And all these other animals risking his life an emotion feels and so it definitely was a an intense moment in a hard day. Speaking of the Bachelor you love the bachelor the Bachelorette and of course we all love Bachelor in paradise and now the next bachelor chapter begins the Bachelor presents. Listen to your Heart Mondays on. Abc This new show has everything. You love about the Bachelor Romance Tubes Chris Harrison and of course drama drama and more drama but with musical strings attached twentieth. Single musicians will step inside the bachelor mansion to embark on an incredible journey to find love through the power of music. The harmony of the couples will be tested by the relationships and judged by some of the biggest names in music like Jason Mraz and Katcha Aunts Bachelor Nation Fan favorites. Which of these new bachelor hopefuls will make beautiful music together? Who Will Strike the right note? And who is there for the song reasons the Bachelor Presents? Listen to your heart a six episode event. Mondays eight seven central only on ABC. After all that and everything said and done do you still wish those things for Peter leg the happiness that he deserves it that he like needs is happily ever after d. Still feel that way on my gosh absolutely no absolutely when we when we decided to to to kind of go our separate way. I mean I I spent like an hour and I remember I just like grabbed his face and just like spend an hour just reminding him of how incredible he is and all like just what like. He's just filled with greatness in he's destined to do great things. I just continue to dislike. Speak Life over him and just remind him of how great he is in that he has such a bright future in he is GonNa make most incredible And Yeah I mean I I wish I wish the world forum end. Yeah that's amazing. I don't know your friendship or what it was with Kelly. But how 'cause I'm sure that's all over your news feed and all the DMZ and so obviously they're quarantining together and we're you to friends during everything yes. It just gets a little interesting. Yeah so we were. Best friends actually We were inseparable throughout the entire process. Everyone jokes that we were like the dynamic duo And really leaned each other through that entire thing. I mean yeah so I mean when I I remember even when I landed a from Australia and got home like she was one of the first people that I called on shoe is in group messages. Me and my family. I mean we were really really close in talks like twenty four seven so I guess I was I was I was definitely Hurt and thrown off by that whole situation Again like I want the best for for the both of them but I definitely was thrown off and I think what was really I mean to be honest? It was really confusing to me. Is that two days before he was spotted in Chicago. He was like calling me taxi. Miss You let's get back together and so I mean I think that's news a little confusing by I mean. I don't know I think like when you break up you know in you're going through a breakup. And you're going through a heartbreaking. You're going through. You know you just came off a show. That was emotionally physically in every which way exhausting. Everybody handles differently. You know. Everybody leans on different things in treats it differently. Like like for me I find it. I venit really important after a breakup to take time to really like invest in myself in make sure my heart's in the best place possible before I'm like you know pursuing any type of relationship because I'm like you know the next release should get in. I mean I don't day to date to marry and so it's like I want. They deserve my hundred percent. You know aren't political. It's so because of that. You Know I. I don't know like I take time to just like you know to pour back into myself. Make sure I'm a really good place in Young focus on myself so I think we definitely handle handle breakup very differently and I'm not saying once once better than the other but I mean that situation definitely caught me off guard. It was a no like phone call or no like hey. I'm going to be hanging out with him or like. What do you feel? No not not not until it got a got leads at got like caught. He got caught with it and again he had days before in so when he texted. He texted me after it had been out for a couple of days in just kind of like Sydney this long long sex Just kind of like kind of explaining himself but not really And just kind of like sharing the current situation or whatever and I mean I was very kind back. I was like look like this doesn't like of anything for me like I. We went our separate ways like I. I'm it's not like I lost something here I guess But I guess I I told him kind of what I'm saying it. I guess what I'm confused about. Peter is that two days ago you were telling how much you loved me in one And now you're with the one I that was like my like my best friend you know and it just feels a little hurtful and and they did that on my birthday on my birthday when all the pictures got leaked everything went out. It was on my birthday and he didn't text me on my birthday. She didn't text me on my birthday in so I also threw that in there. I was like a kind of felt. Like it was kind of like a jab at me to do on my birthday into not even like reach out or anything Very hurtful I again like I mean and I say this genuinely meaning it I mean I. I saw something special in La. That's why she was my best friend. I saw something special in Peter. That's why loved him and wanted to fight so hard to make the relationship work so they're obviously both incredible in special people and I you know I wish nothing but the best for both of them no matter what that looks like You Know I. I know that Peter is not my husband and he's not the first time suspend my forever which I'm grateful for the chance that we had to get to know each other into love each other but I know he's not the one for me and so because of that you know I mean i. I wish him I wish him all the best yet. But so what's your relationship with Kelly now because that to me would be the most hurtful part like Peter Okay. Fine whatever is happening whatever Kelly like so is the friendship. Obviously not there anymore No I haven't spoken to her in a really long time She I don't know I just like I had heard things. I actually asked Peter about some of the things that I had been hearing rumors about him in Kelly. While we were still trying to figure ours being out in just that there had been hang up like hangouts in meet ups in a conversations that had been going on while he was so with. Hannah end in Wa who is also trying to figure things out with ME IN I. I asked him those questions and you know I think it's very interesting. Because his answers and her answers like very much contradict the current situation. Happening right now but But you know it is what it is but you know I think like yet to me. That was the most fruitful thing because I mean she saw like I mean. We walked in so much together and you know like that was a friendship that I thought was going to ask. You GonNa be in my wedding. Thought we were going to be best friends for life in Just just I don't know just like the the love that we had for each other in the level of the depth of our friendship I guess like really confuses me that With just things that we talked about things that she had said to me about Peter in about me and Peter about her and Peter and all that like it was really confusing to me when When when I saw that in just that I don't know that I didn't receive any kind of a heads up. Were any sort of you know a tag stern explanation of why I mean. I'm not saying I necessarily deserve it but I kind of feel like I do because like we aspirin. I think you do because of the if she wasn't one of your close friends I would say no but because she was. It's there's so many things that it's hard to look back on or or expect things from and and everyone will have their reasons as to why and it's hard in those situations you know when you you are feeling like upset about something that one of your friends. Did you have somebody that you were in love with and now this is happening? It's like a heads up or a call or attacks go such a long way when you know you know. Somebody's feelings are going to be hurt. So that's what I was getting in your situation in my situation. It's like you know that takes five minutes to like syntax to make a call you know. And it's like I don't know if the roles were reversed like that would be like the. I thought that I would have like you know I. I WANNA take it to this person. I want them to hear it from me. I in so man. I don't know it's one of those things that I'm like. I'll never fully understand people but that's okay. I mean people probably never influenced me. I mean no. You'll never fully understand. We have to talk about this because it was one of my. I died laughing at all these comments about your eyelashes because girl the I said this is how you know. You're a loved person on TV when all people can find to like. Tear you apart about our. You're gorgeous eyelashes lake. That's it. That's all people could fine. They're like God she's so great and she's sweet and she's loving she's kind and she has good beliefs and morals and values what but eyelashes men. Let's review those apart. It's so funny because I saw my whole life. I've always done ask questions about my lashes like forever and you know obviously gone national. Tv and people just pick you apart for absolutely anything But I don't know it's so funny because I would. I would say like seventy percent of you went through my demons right now. Probably a hundred thousand of them would be asking me. What ask your I use and how I do my eyelashes and so it's like a lot of people appreciate them but then obviously there's the flipside where you have people who are like why you'll ally look like spiders and I'm like I don't know like I don't know I don't know God gave them to me. I signed for it. The world keeps on spinning. I just have gorgeous long eyelashes like it's so funny. 'cause the the usually comes through in you know the DMZ behind the scenes but the hate is very loud. And the yeah. Yeah although those join against everything in Life I've learned like one of your greatest asset to the greatest thing about you or the greatest strength that you have like there's always gonna be people who are GonNa try like you know like you can't appreciate and I decide to tune it all out but I also think it's Kinda funny I'm like hey I mean if you wanna like granddaddy long legs and that's fine. I think it's kind of funny so honestly it is funny any of gorgeous lashes and that's just such ridiculous thing are we're GonNa take a quick break to talk about how we all need a break every now and again but why not keep your brain active while you relax. Well let me tell you you can. And that's exactly why I love the Fun Puzzle Games. Best fiends I actually had a few people tweet me and say they understand my addiction now. It's a superfund game. That also keeps your brain active and you can take it with you everywhere you go because it's on your phone when you need some me time. 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It's hours of fun right at your fingertips and you can even play off line with over one hundred million downloads and tons of five star reviews. Best fiends is a must play. Dalo best fiennes free on the apple APP store or Google play. That's friends without the our best means. We'll be back with more off the vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe. Hey I'm autumn calories and I have a question for you how do you do life? I might be a superstar trainer but also a boy mom sister daughter friend and entrepreneur. You might think my life is all working out and cooking healthy delicious recipes but trust me there is so much more to it and this is it. This is all of those real moments. Talk about with your family and friends ever wonder what else life has to offer. Bring your curious appetite. And let's do life together. Subscribe at Apple podcasts. Spotify and PODCAST ONE DOT COM. Now back to off the vine with Caitlin Bristow. Okay so we're done with the serious stuff. I'm really just thankful that you you were open and spoke from your heart and just decided to have that conversation with me. So let's have a little fun now before we let's let's hasn't done. I've sipping wine this whole time. I'm ready for some fun. Everybody knows I do confessions on this. Podcast something embarrassing and embarrassing story. You WanNa get off your chest that nobody would know about. Give me your best confession right now. I could I could do. We could do a whole podcast with I. Just my embarrassing moments in confessions. I mean I I am someone. It's so funny. My my family can't take me anywhere. I embarrassed myself all the time in. I don't I don't get embarrassed easily. It's embarrassing happens me but I don't necessarily get embarrassed easily. Oh my gosh which wants to go with I have so many I okay should I? Should I share like a really really big one that scarred me when I was like thirteen or should I share one? That happened more recently. Why don't you both so when I was thirteen? I was at one of my best friends pool parties and we had like the whole like thirteen. It's like that really awkward stage. You're like super uncomfortable with yourself. You're like why is my body the way that it is. Why do I look? You're trying to figure yourself out. And everything's changing literally. Everything's changing get like gouves are starting to grow your life. I mean not boobs every every other girls were by Agri in so I remember I was. I was standing about to jump in the pool with one of my friends. Were like taking a cute picture and the whole like football team was behind us. And we're about to jump into the pool and as we go to jump in the pool. A hundred string bikini. She grabs this like she accidentally grabs the strings in my pants completely off. And I'm like mid air in like literally the whole like football team season. I am petrified. Emerson like every song and it's like the most inconvenient in not mention like the people that were the poor people that were in front of me. Who did you taking a photo at the same time so like? Please tell me about that photo right. I'm like I honestly. I need to ask that person. I'm like I would love note. That photo was ever taken come. It'll come back and haunt you now that you've been on national television person's GonNa be like I the picture author but that's so funny honestly but yeah so that was my Horrible story when I was thirteen. Yeah and I was scared to wear string bikinis after that. I still am that. Was that story. A more. Recent story was about two years ago. Okay no like the worst thing ever is when you try and send someone something you send the wrong person. Yes little the worst thing ever. Yeah and I was dating a guy at the time the guy that was talking about earlier that I dated for four years I was dating him and So his his name started with certain letter and this other person's name started with certain letter and I spent this long voice memo just like Lovey dovey like all dislike like sweet things and I looked down ten minutes later. Denied Senate to my pastor suicide. I'm like the one person voted not to prosper. I might I resign cringing for the next week. That was the one time that I was actually very embarrassed. R-texas life and I was like please please please. No that was Mitzi. Since my boyfriend that was not an hitting on your husband like you know. Delete out all our so embarrassing. It is literally the one person you would not want to send an accidental text. You at least it wasn't like at least it wasn't like like you know a little more inappropriate like at least it was sweet and loving. It was yeah it was more like Mushy gushy. But you know I mean definitely stuff. You don't want your pastor or know any any adult but especially pastor hearing about I will never forget one of my best friends in the world. I. I don't remember how old we were. But she went through a phase and she did something pretty inappropriate and funny and she accidentally pocket dialed her parents. While telling me about it. That was one then literally a week later something had happened where she was at a bar and her photo was taken and used on like girls. Gone Wild This is the craziest thing that's ever happened. It was used on. Girls Gone Wild where she didn't even know that she had signed something to be on it and she was on like it was back in the day when you could go to a movie store and like go to like the new releases and girls gone. Wild was actually in new releases and she was on it and her pastor had to sit her down because of it. Yes yeah so that when be? That might be my gosh awful awful. I know I'm trying to think if I have one for you because I'm like I have to confess every week sometimes twice a week. I'm like do I. Did I write anything down or you embarrass yourself easily. I don't get embarrassed over. Yes see I don't have anything. I'm the same way like you can't take me anywhere. I don't easily get embarrassed. I'm trying to think of anything that I've done in the last few days that I could be like. I'm sure Jason could tell you something embarrassing but here. It's here the compassion for that's what you nuts. Those are the true confessions. When you're not tell me about tell me about me. A He'd be like you don't care because you tell everyone everything anyways like I will talk about. Anything on this podcast. Anything goes like it's it's so I can't think of anything if I do. Allah I'll do a voice note. I'll send it to you. Not My pastor and and I'll add it to the podcast Boyce. Minnows are literally my favorite gets how I communicate with like all my friends. I just the right person get dangerous. I love them to like my love language. Okay we're GONNA play plead the fifth where. I'm going to ask you three questions and you can plead the fifth to only one. So here's questions you get to choose from okay. Who would you least likely run like to run into from the Bachelor Mansion and or your first question or you can answer what was going through your mind on that couch when Barbas saying you wouldn't make it with Peter. God I'm sweating. I'm okay I'll go with the second one because truthfully I genuinely did love everyone in the house. Obviously you're very different rabbi. I did love all the girls. What was going through my mind honestly. I think I was so shocked that I just was like what's happening. What's happening what you do? It was like one of those moments that you know like you you kind of this out of body experience that you're looking at the situation and you're like oh you're you're in trouble. What are you going to? You don't know what you're GonNa do so I mean honestly it was. It was so fast like those things are so fast five minutes long so I mean I didn't have a lot of time to like reprocess Peter knows like Peter because he didn't help you this. I was like you can tell them on the phone for the past week how much you love. This is your time to say it right now. No heathen didn't throw you any bones. There he was like look. This shook as I I mean we were both like. That's what I said I try and justify it for everyone. Everyone side because I'm like what do you do in that moment? You know you're on live TV your put on the spot. You WanNA react in a mature way to logically not emotionally like all these things. But you're like what do I do? So you freeze. That's just what you do and Chris Chris Chris Ayers and looked at me and he was like not that happening. Say Cocaine Yeah. I text Chris after I was like. What the hell just happened and he was like. I don't know but it's like I really don't know all of us all about nature. Okay here's your other to choose from if you watch the season back. Which scene was the hardest for you to watch? Or who from the franchise? Would you most likely go on a date with you is? They're both great questions. I agree thank you. I don't know okay. I'll go with number two. I don't know because I really huge on personality. So you know it depends on like our personalities vibe and again there's only so much you see on TV an. I've never met like any other than Peter. But Hand Brown had a pretty Pretty good cast pretty good selection. Yes she did. I Okay I would say it's one person it's one. I I can tell you if I mean pick five. I don't care I would say okay I would say. There's there's three from her season that I think are really cute in really sweet. I don't know that I would ever vibe with them. But okay. Let's see I would say conor tyler in Mike are probably the those are three really good ones? That are just like really attractive in really sweet. Just don't follow connor on Tick Tock Place. Have you seen his tectonics? No THEY'VE AD. Oh dear Lord. I don't know what it is changed my opinion. I think he seems like such a Sweetie Cutie. And so nice. But I'm like I watch. Sometimes his pick talks. Come up on like my. You know if I'm just swiping and I'm like waiting for something I'm a that was your talk you know. That's that's again that's like me hate on an eyelash is if that's the only thing I can really out about him that's bad. Hey but important. It has become my life during this quarantine so it carries a heavyweight there. You Go yeah. Just watching them. We'll see but tyler who good one and and Mike. You haven't talked to either one of them No. I haven't talked to any. I mean that hoping came out with the corner thing. When we hadn't even talked it was just him reaching out after finale by telling me that I did done such a good job and he was just like here if I ever need anything. It just really really sweet but we never like were talking back and forth so. I haven't really talked to. Any of them haven't met any of them But again just from what I've seen on. Tv they all are cute Threat they say. Well I know Tyler. And he's very sweet and the other two seem very nice. So those are good picks. Those are good pets. Okay either. Who is the most famous person who slid into your DM's or did you or did you not right? Genuine unreal on your own instagram posts. Got Okay well okay. I will actually answer that. No one will believe me and no one I will. I'll believe you. It doesn't matter these days if you tell the truth or not because people are going to have their opinions and they're going to believe what they want to believe but be true. True story is that I did not write that. My friends really did right. That's happened to me. That's why I believe you well. It's so hard because when you have different accounts if the notification pops up like I've had to run like a couple of businesses business accounts reports of notation. Pops up like you click on. It goes to the other accounts. What happens was when I was on the show? I had always photography accounts like these different accounts. Or whatever and my phone number address and things like that were on there and people were like leaking it and getting a hold of it in so my mom got one of her friends to Kinda like hack into my instagram to take that down and delete those pages and Into she had access to like all accounts and had kind of helped me taping down in and run things a little bit and in so she just was like accidentally on it in common but again literally I mean I honestly wish that it would have been me because I'm like honestly I think it's hilarious in I WanNa omit unlike I thought about buying one of Nick byles shirts and rubbing any like. Yeah this is this is. This is my life but it really. It really truly was like friends but But again don't no one believes it and that's fine too. That's funny 'cause Cleo my manager and one of my best friends she has access to my account and that's actually happened with us before where she went to write on one of my pictures it was just. I wasn't as relevant as you at the time so it didn't get picked up picks up literally will I I remember. She called me and she was panicked panic. She was getting black. She was getting so much hate because people are people and she like DMZ account that picked it up immediately and they responded they relied. Ll It happens like that's so funny like no worries but they didn't take down literally every account picks it up it literally on every magazine and I was like yes. That's great. I mean honestly I should start something Janina genuine. And I'm like it's it's yeah you need to like brand that. It's so funny because I'm like that's such an innocent thing. Google my name during my time and see what pops up. You'll feel a lot better about everything with all. Its like everybody like leeches onto something and everyone has opinions about everything so totally the world we live in. I get it okay. Last one describe Peter's basketball skills in one word or who do you think was the least compatible with Peter out of all? The girls heaters basketball skill. Oh my gosh I would say first of all after that after that hometown date like when it aired those tweets about his basketball skills. Were probably my favorite's entire season they were iconic. He's skills in one word. All man honestly. The first thing that comes to my mind is tragic. I mean is tragic and and it's like I'm trying to obviously be like the girl girlfriend or whatever I was at the time around like you're doing great to be here and I'm like these little middle schoolers train on a regular basis or better do better but hey I mean it wasn't his thing and he'll be the first to admit and so no no hate. No shame but it was hilarious. You're nuts that's really funny. All right so being home so much especially during a crisis like this can be a breeding ground for anxiety without the stability of our normal daily routine. 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The APP make sure to use the code vine to get one hundred dollars off your first month and show your support for the show that's vine at talks base dot Com. Okay well okay I have. How much time do you have five minutes? Yeah I'm in quarantine live all night. That's the thing people don't have excuses anymore. If I'm like do you have five minutes? You say no Liar Liar. You are going to put on sweats. Lay in bed and watch Netflix. That's what do you watch it on. Netflix okay I I really have A. We are family has been more into movies lately. We really haven't gotten into show their my family's been into a cry for Executives caught. It's like all American or something. Yeah I saw that on Netflix. Yeah so a little bit of that. And then We watch the voice when the voice comes on. Listen to your heart just started. I mean isn't a few different shows but none that I've really got into efficacy to friends off which was like ever the twenty four seven. If you'd like I could reenact every season every episode. I look at the titles and I'm like I could tell you literally full on description on exactly what happens in every single episode that actually that would be a good game to be like okay this episode and you'd have to tell me what season and like we can. We play that we need to date. We'll do when we can actually do podcast in person. We'll do like a whole friends trivia game. Okay okay so this one. I just want to know 'cause it's relationship dealbreakers. Okay so just. Yes or no deal breaker. Not Today I one I. He's been engaged before then engaged before. No that's not a deal breaker for me. I mean I'd want I'd ask questions for sure. I'd want to know why he's I've been engaged before and I'm like what you want to know all your you don't get along with his family. Yeah that's that's that's kind of a deal breaker. It's totally deal breaker for me. He expects you to cook dinner every night. I mean I would. I would try to negotiate. Batum really good negotiator. I like that but I enjoy like I like eating in but I'm not probably going to be the typical housewife. That's just not me so yeah so like I mean. If that's like a a must in life may have to have that typical housewife than like. That's not me like it's not gonNa work out totally. He has a bunch of inappropriate. Instagram accounts that he follows. I guess it depends on like what it is like naked girls. Yeah that's probably there's probably some underlying issues there Dealbreaker would be for me to Let's pick a couple good ones okay. He's a fan of you from bachelor. Well is it like an admirable typing or is it like I'm obsessed with you type thing That's you're finding a loophole hair. I because it matters. It's like okay. I really loved how you handled yourself like. I'm trying to like okay now. I'm so I'm going to go with the route that he's like obsessed and that's the only so Y- yeah this creepy. Okay and then He. He has no manners. Ou know. That's dealbreaker yeah me too. I need I need to manners. What about if? He's a bad tipper tipper look at a restaurant I mean. I feel like that that something. That's not that big as I feel there's conversations that you can have you know what I mean I'd be like. Why are you so Frugal? Like why aren't you like but I feel like that's something you could talk through whereas Kinda that's true. You can train them. Yeah Yeah you can train them. Okay well to end this off. Why don't you tell us what you learned the most about yourself through all of this and where everybody can find you? Okay the Mo what I learned the most about my time on the show I would say honestly. It's just like something that I've kind of lived on my entire life but it's definitely something that came out even more when I was on. The show is like no. You are always stand up for what you believe in and Yeah I don't don't be ashamed of that. You know in in just because there's this pressure were. There's these expectations of you have high standards. Know what you want and don't settle for anything less than that Don't let other people define you? Don't let other people tell you what you should or shouldn't do Nobody you are no what you deserve in. Never settle for anything less than that. Yes I love it snaps for you. And before people know where they can find him they already do but is there anything that we missed that you'd WANNA touch on that? We didn't anything you want to say to everybody that that you just didn't get a chance to no no. I mean I think we. We did a good job of covering everything I really. I really am appreciative. Of all of those who have been so supportive in so encouraging during this time you know this is this is something that was really hard to walk through and Mike. You said it's hard being in a position where a lot of people don't get to see all of you they see what's on the TV screen in a little bit that there is on there and like you said like some of its edited version. So it's you know they don't get to see the fullness of who you are and now is really difficult and so I just I want to thank everyone honestly who have just been Amazing it kind of rallied around me during this hard time. I'm really hard on myself. And so it's really encouraging. I think here affirmations from other people into no alike. Oh I actually encourage someone and I actually was able to help someone in help you know like one of my favorite things was actually remember. After I shared fantasy date with Peter. I remember getting on twitter and I had all these girls tweeting at me saying Thank you were just like being unashamed of who you are your standards like it's completely challenge me. And also one that that tweeted at me and said that she had had a bunch of guys or a few guys snapchat her and say. I'm sorry for the way that I treated. You be treated better. And because like I see you know there's value in treating women respected women who have high standards like you know. I I apologize for not doing that. So that was like really really touching encouraging gin Just to know that you go through something hard to know that you're able to somehow like encourage someone that is is really encouraging so I would saving you to those who who have come alongside me but other than that you know I mean I e like you know I feel like we did a good job on touching on a lot of things. We did a really good job. And I can't believe I didn't bring up the whole time that you're going out with Selena Gomez that's great. She is amazing. I love her. She's great new amazing either. I think she's such a cool room role model and like a good a good person. That's out there in that world. So that's cool that you have someone like Nazi was like she really came along side of me. You hung out. I spent time with her right. After the break-up so she was really awesome person just to lean on just had so much wisdom so much advice and just such a good job of loving on me during that time. So we're yes. She's she's amazing justice literally the most incredible human in just as what you would imagine her to be. She is time to end so I have heard that I have heard that through many people who have met her know her that that she is the real deal and very sweet and she seems that way. So that's and she's been through her fair share of the you know media and relationships so good person lots of advice I'm sure and then where Where can everybody find you what you have coming up next So as soon as this quarantines over my plans are to move out to La and To kind of start this new chapter. I'm young I'm single. Unlike Lysa was just you know I don't know like I. I WANNA be adventurous in. Try New things in just Canada's myself out there I've lived in Alabama whole life. Some like was do something new. Let's try something new and so I'm going to go out there. I don't know if I'll love. It might heated. Might end up moving but my love. It might say forever. So never know you'll find out and take talked. Tell me all the good stuff. Instagram atty Peru talk at Mattie Peru. You can find me catch. Catch me on top that I'm sitting pretty much all of my time during warranty and when I'm bored out of my mind I am swirling through ticks off and trying to remake these dances or seven so it has been my favorite thing honestly during so it's it's addicting it is addicting. I'm like someone who's takes way for me. Yeah I know it's literally it's literally all I do and then Jason will bust me like trying to lick dance. It's so funny. They we need to do an account like someone needs to do the behind the scenes of like failing every talk but is it. Well thank you so so much for coming on the podcast and sharing your side of the story and I know from personal experience. That things can be really difficult and challenging but I mean so much light and so much beauty can come from this as well and I'm sure you learned a lot along the way so And then maybe just you know when this comes out at a link and swipe up for your Mascara I wanNA know. Give the people what they want. Thank you so much. And I'm Kaitlyn Bristowe. I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening. To off the vine with Kaitlyn bristowe get new episodes. Every Tuesday -clusive Lee on podcast one dot com the podcast one APP and prescribe on Apple podcasts TV.

Peter Hannah GEICO Geico Dot Com Mike Ordinary Kaitlyn Bristowe Jason Mraz ABC basketball Webber spotify apple Madison Pruitt High Addison Google Jenner Kim Auburn Alabama
Rachel & Becca Answer Your Questions

Bachelor Happy Hour with Rachel & Ali – The Official Bachelor Podcast

1:11:41 hr | 5 months ago

Rachel & Becca Answer Your Questions

"Of all are happy our listeners. We hope you guys are doing well. We hope you guys enjoyed the long weekend. You got an extra day in there. Celebrate the holiday. Some may have some may not have I understand if you go, but we know that. You, know this. Just everything that we've been going through all twenty twenty, but last month, not a couple months ago, just from the beginning of this year. It's just been a lot, and we know that it's been really hard to celebrate things just with everything that's going on in in life personally, even if it's not affecting you, it's affecting just watching it just reading it. So I hope that you've got some time to just relax, read self care, self love just in light of everything that's going on and I feel like our podcast have been a little bit heavy to, but very relevant so I appreciate it and I'm glad that we have the space to do that. Glad that we had clear on where we could just. Get to know her more. Everybody gets her more because I feel like there's so much depth to her and even in two episodes. We still didn't get all of it out of her so. In light of everything that's going on. We figured you know what let's have a little fun today. Let's do something that we haven't done before, but that we always talk about at the end of every single episode. You guys. We always ask for you to write in us, and you know just comment DM US ask US questions, and you guys have been doing that, and you know what we haven't been holding our end of the bargain until today. So, we're going to answer your questions. We're going to dive into some of so excited to do this. We're GONNA. Go through these questions for the first time. We haven't prepped our answers or anything. Just let you guys know it is impossible to get to every single. One of you guys, but just know we see you. We love you. Appreciate you for listening into every episode with us, and so we want to honor you guys today. So that's what we're GONNA do. Yeah, rage I can't wait. I feel like we've talked about doing this. This is something that we've both probably wanted to do for quite some time, and we kind of did it on the lives a few weeks ago. You know in quarantine, didn't we? Did our lives We did get her onto some questions, but there's obviously so many more that are just like flooding in not only our inboxes, but the bachelor happy hour. INSTAGRAM's inbox and so this is our chance. And especially, because we're all watching the RECAPS, the bachelors greatest seasons ever especially after talking to Claire I feel like it's a stirring up some nostalgia for us, because about to embark on her journey, and we you know talking with her. We can kind of pull ourselves back and put ourselves in her shoes and remember what that feels like. And there's so many fun memories in moments that like Intel. You talk about an answer it. You don't even remember that something happened and so it's GonNa be a fun little. Walk Down, memory, lane for us. I don't know about you, but I'm ready to clean up my inbox with some of these dams to get around to these questions, but that doesn't mean. Don't send them in so pleased. Hopefully we'll be able to do this like you know every couple of weeks or so just because it's fun. And Rachel I'm excited to hear from you, too. Because, of course, there's probably some similarities that we both went through on our seasons, but a ton of differences to has we had a thousand different men and experiences and destinations and dates, and so let's just get into it and go through our experiences. Murder, in Hollywood land is sponsored by the infamous America podcast infamous America explore some of the wildest and darkest true crime stories in American history, heightening the listening experience with cinematic storytelling, music and sound design right now they're telling the story of D B Cooper the mystery man who hijacked an airplane in Nineteen, seventy one, and then disappeared without a trace, the case became a legendary unsolved crime here that story and others about the Salem witch trials the black sox scandal bank robber. John Dillinger and the manhunt for John Wilkes booth subscribe to infamous America Today on Apple PODCASTS spotify or wherever you're listening right now. All right so like I said. We have so many questions to get to, and we're going to try to get to as many of them as possible, but we're also not trying to keep you guys here all day. So you know or are, we may what May. Okay, so let's just start with the first one all right so first question says we love you guys so much. How the hell are you guys doing I think this is a perfect way to start off because it's just Let's just check in you know, and so there's so much going on. We're just in the middle of unprecedented times. If I'm honest I have highs and lows. Some days I wake up and I feel hopeful and just ready to tackle the day, and then other days I'm just I. Take Fifteen steps back. You know for example the other day I was podcasting and we were just talking about different issues that are going on in our country, and we had to talk about another story another tragedy, another murder specifically we were talking about allies McLean and we're. We're just not talking about if it's something that happened last year, which is part of the bigger problem which you can understand why people are still marching in the streets in the so angry, so I'm trying not to get on a soapbox, but the point is. Is that having to talk about that? Having to listen to the audio of another person dying begging for their life just really took me back. And my host said something really good about. You don't feel guilty. It's you can't give. A, paraphrasing what he said three. Don't feel guilty if you can't. Give your all to it if you can't watch that video if you can't listen to that audio, that doesn't mean that you've given up on the fight for justice. It just means that you have to check yourself mentally, so if anybody else may be going through out there, which is hard to watch another video. It's hard to listen to the audio. It's hard to read about another murder. You know it's okay for your own sanity and your mental health to take a step back or talk to somebody or to admit that you're just not okay because that was me the other day. So so all that to say you know I try not to stay in that place, and I tried to be hopeful and to try to make a difference in the the best way that I know how. Ya That's how I'm doing good days bad days. And that's life I feel like. We started off with like the most loaded question that we could have like. How are we doing? Yeah! I mean twenty twenty For me, personally I think for a lot of people in not only our country, but our world it's testing us, and there's so many different factors like I think I mentioned this on our podcast two weeks ago, when we were talking with Caitlyn, but like covert is still a thing, and because everything else. That's taking place Is At the forefront sometimes I forget like Oh my God. We were living through quarantine end. This shutdown and people are dying. There's so much going on in this year. I started twenty twenty like on this high because I had the bachelor live on stage tour. I had the podcast girl. It was e mailing, and now I look back like just a couple of months ago and I feel like I was at a totally different place in my life like completely different mindset, and so yeah, it's definitely with everything happening. I feel like I'm being tested I'm. Learning a lot more about myself and my friends and my family, and just having new conversations that I've never had before in my life and so Yeah, good days bad days Thank God for Minot because she keeps me saying. It's like dogs do so much I know. She's like she is like my therapy pat. But. Yeah, I feel like I started. Twenty twenty and I had that was trying to find the other day I I had a list of. Like resolution, so that want to do for the year and my number? One thing was working on my patients which has definitely happened this year because of everything and I just want to add to that. Not only to be patient, but to keep expanding in what I don't know and my knowledge base, and to be okay with having the bad days in the down days. I feel like especially. In the world that we live in rage, you know we're always on social media and doing interviews and we're out there and you WANNA. Try to put on a brave face, but I think I'm learning that. That's not the case that's this is not the year to to do that and to pretend everything's perfect and so. Just going through the motions. I mean you know. Thank, God I have a great support, group and friends and family, but. I'm learning a lot. Twenty twenty is I. It's been a lot, but you know I. Look at it as I. Mean like I would never want to not do twenty twenty for as many crazy things that have happened. Let's kind of where I am. I think that first of all. I'm shocked that you're not a patient person. I would have never thought about you. You seem so. Ask My mom. She will be exact opposite I'm trying I'm working you. You come across the Great Society. You're putting out. Said, you seem so patient I'm. I'd actually probably more patient than people think that I am. But it's something I had to work on myself. But something that you said that I think is a good way to in this question is twenty twenty. First of all, let me say I've always said. On years are my years, and I try to project that on other people as well. This is an even year. Is being taken I. Mean all my milestones in my life has happened in odd years. Go Go back and think about that for yourself many I don't know you're the Bachelorette in two thousand eighteen, so maybe maybe even years of your thing but. Odd I two years for me and I something you set though that I want to emphasize is that there has been a lot of learning this year and that is when I. Get hopeful you know when I have a good day because y'all may be frustrated about some things, but we have have debated people's attention in a way that we never have been able to before and I'm grateful that people are learning and I'm grateful that people are recognizing things about themselves and society the society we live in in a way that they haven't ever, and that makes me hopeful for the next generation. So what I try to channel. When I'm when I'm having a bad day. What do you do I wanNA. Know like for you personally when you're having one of those bad down days. Is there something that you do or that? You someone you gravitate towards? How do you handle those days? Yeah, I mean I'm fortunate that I have outlets than my podcast is a really good, the other one a good outlet in because we talk about these issues and use vet, and so that really helps me channel it. I talked to family friends that I can't Brian's. Poor Brian unlike like. Kelly with rats missing any so patient and thank goodness. He just gets it. So that really helps to, but also journaling, meditating praying, working out I, mean all things to just release even as in the shower, and just crying, screaming singing all those things just to release whatever it is that I'm feeling. And Reading Too I. I've never really been a big fiction reader. In Quarantine I've been reading fiction because it just allows me to escape reality. I like that that's see I'm the opposite where I used to always read fiction because I wanted to get out of my head and and put myself in some other storyline. But lately I've switched and I've been trying to read more nonfiction Just like. My sister and mom have just like a stack of books that I'm back in Minnesota right now. My Mom's place that I'm going to try to get through. But one thing I one thing I. Do I really liked true crime so I still listen to my true crime podcast in just like. Take a walk if I can just seem to like zone out and get away from everything. That's what I do right now maybe has. A true crime podcast at one point I couldn't do it I liken to. My podcast, the news I I love like a good journalism story. Such a nerd in that. all right so next questions I feel like we answered so many questions in just that one But here's a question that we get almost every day. Rachel and I don't know if this is in terms of so they're asking. Who is our dream guests so either I'm assuming on our podcast, but it just a dream guest to chat with in general. I. Do you have one in mind. Well. Go ahead. Please well I would. I would say. Any goes into when I was the lead of the dates that I really wanted was well and I've said this before handed got it with with the drag Queens on one I group dates, but a dream guest of mine would probably be Paul. That's. because. I mean. Like she's done at all, and she for those who haven't seen her Paul's drag race a highly recommend checking it out. But. She's kind of like. The Chris Hairston role where she oversees. All of the contestants, but I don't know I. Just I would love. I never met her at Drake on last year, and I would love to have re Paul as a guest. I'm GonNa just aim high. I feel like I. Don't know if ever happened, but that'd be my number one I would say I almost want to steal yours. I, I, am truly thinking. Who in the world would I want? On the PODCASTS I'm just gonNA say Michelle Obama. Well. In this, okay, beside not to everyone. Rachel shared with me that she's talking to be on his mom after this so i. talked to so many people already. You've already had that amazing opportunity. I HAVE ESPN fortunate stocks replay Michele is not one of them I had the pleasure to meet or talk to so I. Think I'm GonNa go with her. got a good one. So, let's. Just. put it out there this. Put all the good Juju. I would love that Oh my God. Can you I feel like though if we had either Michelle, Obama, or re Paul I would not talk. I would clam up. You would have to I. would just sit back and listen and smile you believe I would i. know I would want to just like pick their brains apart. I would be mall at. Okay. What celebrity would you want to see as the bachelor or the Bachelorette? You cannot say Rupaul. We I can't say shallow Volvo. We cannot name those two out. This is one that I said before and I've said it into his face. I love Michael Strahan you. Ashtray hand. Michael I know he has a girlfriend right now. At least I think he still does if not I mean. I don't know. I would do regardless of. My Life I would take a two month hiatus in life and go back on the season just to be around him. Michael is Great. He's what you see is what you get is Lakshmi way in person. Okay, my. Celebrity that I would love to see on Ryota. Down Riana, she would run through those men. She could perform saying dance whatever it may be. Like reality just like so it doesn't care about stuff and I. Just think I mean like she's gives zero. Trying not to curse is zero ass at so I feel like we would just get a Bachelorette telling it like it is knows what she wants. The man would be so intimidated. Bar. Korea I think if we ever GONNA. If we would even need twenty five to thirty. Guys I would just watch her. I would just hurry. You know who else would be good What is her name in real life? Lena Hiti I think plays Hershey Lancaster only. Playing into that, she would bus those guys balls. She would put them in their place. So entertaining, but then again like I would only watch it for the lead in no one. Right and assuming she's in real life. You really just want Starsky. Will I follow her in Instagram I. Love Her. She's so outspoken she takes like. Bullshit and so I feel like she is I mean not as extreme obviously Percy was like two people, but I feel like she's still. She's bad ass Boston. real-life bound got I wanNA I WANNA. Follow her. I want to see how she's good. Okay Everyone's Cup of tea but I I enjoy her. Yeah, that sounds like my sipho chick. Or even though we're halfway through twenty twenty, it feels like the world is still in flux, and we're still off of our normal schedules I have been trying to hold myself accountable as best as I can to still exercise regularly, which is why I've been using num num has helped me track my exercise, no matter how squeezing it. In these days it's a program that doesn't require you to commit to any sort of rigorous plan and in space in psychology, so new teaches you. Y You do the things that you do and it also empowers you with tools to break that habit a replace them with even better. Better ones and even though is designed by psychologists. There's no scientific jargon or complicated stuff to remember. They are simply behavior change experts plus new knows that you're human, so if you go off track, that is totally okay. There's no shame in it. It just improvise you tips to help you get back on track tomorrow. There's a science to getting healthier, and it's called neum sign up for your trial today at Neum, that's an oem dot com slash p., h. h. because what do you have to lose visit? NEUM DOT COM slash P. H. H to start your trial today. That's new OEM DOT COM SLASH H. Okay so this is a question that. Funny that we get this because I always ask myself this question in a always self check. And the person who wrote the sense said if you had never come on the show. What do you think you would be doing as a career now? I. Don't know if you do this backup at high always I I would have to say every week. At some point during the week as say okay. It's it's Tuesday. It's one o'clock. Right now, if I had never gone on the Bachelor And I think about that and I'd be like I'm I'd be office will be in a courtroom I'd be in a deposition. WHAT IBM a relationship I don't know what I I have no idea, but I always self check like. You know one decision can change the entire trajectory of your life. For me, that was someone coming in my office, saying trials or down the street to. Go. We should all go my always do that i. mean so to answer the question. You know if I hadn't been the Bachelorette or even gone on the bachelor. I would still be an attorney at still be. The same of is no idea what my love life would be you know at that time I was coming out of a relationship ships still trying to hang onto the remnants of aid, even though I knew it was, it was over. but yeah my career I. Still Be an attorney you know even after the faster I went back and practice law yet after the Bachelorette I still practice for year and a half after so I would definitely still be practice. Oh Man! I don't even know I. Feel like I mean 'cause I was working as a publicist in PR before the show. I felt like where I was. Though at my agency, I'd like reached the end so I was ready for some sort of transition which thank God at the time it was the show. I mean easy answer. I would probably still be doing pr maybe for a more. Fun like lifestyle, company or for lifestyle brands? But like? Would I love? It would be like my dream passionate job. Probably not I feel like. Now I mean in a perfect world. That'd be a homicide detective. We're like a wall Catholic editor something. Not that I could ever do it, but just. You know going back. If I could do it all again I think I would pick maybe a different career path, but yeah I. Don't know like I. I don't know because. Without going on the show and meeting Garrett. I would've never probably moved out to California and thank God I did because I. Love it out there. I'd probably still be Minnesota. Dealing with the cold depressing winters I. Don't know I. It's hard to tell. I probably wouldn't have kids yet I. Just Yeah. I feel like I still have things in life that I wanted to do. It's interesting you say that because. Right before I tried out for the Bachelorette I was in La for one of my really good friends She's having a baby. I was there for a baby shower and I remember it'd been the first time I had been to La, ten years, and I remember her being there and thinking how I something just feels different as still like my be here, and my my friends that were at the baby shower like you come out here and I was seriously thinking taking the California bar. and. The type of law that I was practicing. Focused in sports law in law school and I always knew I wanted to go back to sports and entertainment, but I was stuck in a place of being complacent, a little too scared to make that job because I knew I always didn't want to practice law forever in that way, so it's interesting after hearing, you say that it just brought me back to where I was at the time. You know I was I loved. What is said, but I was always looking out the window and kind of wondering and imagining for more It's crazy that you know now. We have the opportunity at a little bit more freedom to explore the things that we've always wanted to do. Yeah, it's funny because it's like. Look back and I. You know you get out of college. You find your job. You think your life is going to turn out different. You're like I. When I Graduated College, I was twenty. Two knows like oh my gosh. I'm going to get married to I'm going to have kids. I'm probably always consignment a soda. A fast forward to when I was when I first went on the show I was twenty seven I think and. Like. At that point. I was like I'm just GonNa, live my life and have fun and see where the world takes me and maybe move to California. And now like you said we have the ability to kind of switch up our lives and our roles or look what we wanted to do, so it's like you know. Maybe I could become a book editor somehow like maybe I won't go back to school to get a new degree. Who knows like the world is you're always stir people so for any twenty two year old girls out there. who think your life's GonNa go one way, and you're dead. Set on like getting married and having kids right away just in time it some time. Fun and don't. Step outside of the box. That's what always held me back. Yeah, did you? I'd asked how many people just because I'm curious when you went to college. Did you ever study abroad? Now. I never wanted to. Really I know it's weird and I feel dumb saying that out loud now, but I didn't i. just kind of was like I knew where I wanted to go and remind major, I was more focused on finding a really good internship in the sports industry and was studying abroad just didn't go along with my career path, and that's what I focus I worked for the NBA in New York that that was my by goal to get with an a league and work with them, Damn. Life. No. That's the one regret I wish I would have. I. I was about to I was GonNa, go to Adelaide, Australia for the smaller and It just was such A. Mess with the admissions back and forth for months and months I just finally pulled out, but I wish looking back. That's like the one thing in college. I wanted to do that. Never did so gotTa make it to Adelaide One day, Adelaide How crazy with that have been. That's where you went on your season. Full Circle. Who talked to my mom? This well. okay next question. To. Present Day. Someone wrote in. That they're interested in the podcast, and so, what are some pointers for being a good host rich? Let you take this because you are the best house. NOT ALL-STOCK BECCA, please pressure. You know you're only as good as the people you surround yourself with so give yourself some credit for sure I would say I think it can be intimidating. Start a new podcast so Kudos for you for wanting to do it because there's so many podcast out there and you think. How can you stand out and be different and I think the only way to do that is there's there's probably everybody has the idea out there? You know whatever subject matter you're GonNa talk on. It's already out there. What makes us different, is you? And Finding Your Voice, and how you're going to relay the information to whatever audience it is so I think finding voice finding. The subject matter and the topics for your podcast having segments I think really differentiate yourself from other podcasts to and then knowing who your audience says in how you want, it. Make sure you have the right target audience for your podcast, but if one thing if I'm going to pick it is your voice, you being you. People are going to come. Listen to your podcast because of who you are and what you bring to the table and I would also say part of that is being well-researched in what you're saying whether it's informing educating you know just entertaining. Make sure that. You research what it is actually talking about as people will call you out on your BS. It's Oh yeah. Take it from someone pointing myself right now from home, so yeah, he get out. I want to add onto that to those are some great pointers thing to that I think I've learned from the past couple months of doing just this podcast in general is like guess really can make a good episode for our listeners and I mean. Thank God like especially when we recap seasons, thank, God, we have the lead at contestants or people who have performed or guests who have been on. That make it more fun, but like an even thinking about who we've talked to for like. Listen to your heart. I think they bring such a new perspective like when we had cash shy Jason Mraz. And read a Wilson. They bring such a different vibe. To what does the Bachelor Happy Hour? PODCAST was and so. It just adds a good variety, so make sure that if you can at times, have some awesome guests and. Also to like yes, this is our podcast hosts, but people don't always want to hear from us. They want to hear from the guests. So make sure you have the right questions. Good questions listen fellow up questions and just keep that conversation open and flowing. Yeah! Absolutely and networking I thing not only for podcasting, but literally any career endeavor networking is key. Just say yes to talking to people. Put yourself out there. It's not probably going to hurt you. The more people you know, the better you never know who knows someone, and so that's key I. Think for anyone starting something new and for any job network. Okay, so this is a question backup. I don't know if I've ever been asked this question in all the years. Of the bachelor franchise, but it's. Do you ever miss having quote normal lives where you could go places without being recognized? So. Here's what I find interesting about this question. Bachelor. Nation is a bubble. And I think a lot of people. It's easy to get caught up in that. Everybody knows you because the audience is big, and so many people talk about it on social media, or even in publications, but I come from a world where I did not watch the show before none of my friends watched the show for my family members so I come from a world where I have seen you BECCA walking down the street and I would have never have known who you are so i. Don't I? I guess function in a world where I don't think people know who I am because I come from rural people do not the show. I think it's very easy to get caught up in thinking that nobody knows us because there is such a large audience, but the reality is most people. Don't know us now. Zoo. We give recognized Oscar for myself. I won't put words in your mouth. Do I recognize absolutely? But I don't get fracking vast to the point where I can't eat at a restaurant I can't grab a drink unless I go to like a college bar or something like that, but for the most part it's somebody might say hi, and so I feel personally like I live a very normal life. I don't think it's hard for me to function in this world I mean. Yes, there are. There Times that I've been surprised and I'm like. Oh, my gosh was I picking my nose with? ME. When I say in the far. But for the most part I feel quite. Like I live a normal life A little bit of both I think it depends on. Where I'm at. Least when I'm in, California. No one thankfully like really cares 'cause. There's actual like cool celeb- right in La. I will say when I come back to my hometown Minnesota. It's a little bit different just because it's a smaller town, not as much happens in Minnesota, so it is different like there are times where I'll be driving down the road and I. Don't I'll have my sunglasses on my hat on. Thank God for facemasks now, but people will like. Come up like if I'm parked like. Knock on the window. Yeah. I spent a couple times in Minnesota where, like sitting down or walking, people have come up, put their arms around me and I like I get very on edge just because it that incense like the personal space in the touch. Scares me from strangers shut. And like end of the day I mean we're still people to I would never go up to a random person like grab them rice me. But Yeah I think for the most part like you said it. Is this bubble and you know there's I think when one person recognizes you and makes you know more of like a thing about it than other people kind of look into what's going on, but usually for the most part. It's so chill that yeah like you can go into your. You're saying. Just fine, unless as you said like you're a college town, or I'm in my hometown. It's those are the only cases where it's a little bit more extreme, but it's only colleges. Airforce group of girls. One girl was like that is to her, and she was like. Are you Rachel and so like Basketball Team of college? colleges the only time where it's like okay, this is a little out of control. You know I a little bit too much for me, but other than that you know most people recognize you don't even say anything with yeah I appreciate. I will say when you first get off the show. That's when it's the craziest, and then you fill the measure to kind of always be on with if you're lucky enough to leave the show with. A significant other. You feel like I. Remember Article Came Out. That was like Ryan. Rachel were both on their phones, and they weren't talking to each other, and it's like okay. You feel like you need to be lovey Dovey, smiling and happy all the time. Right off the show and then you. Things normalized in your life. Yeah, does that all the time in real life? Yeah, exactly Lake Your especially when you live with someone near together all the time like you gotta check your phones, you gotta still do your own thing and have your own space and time and everything so I will say. When you mentioned college when I was on the tour. For like the month that we were traveling, it was so funny because a lot of times whether it was before or after the show itself like. Bannon I am. Dancers would guard and grab drinks dinner at some places and Bedouin for whatever reason always be early and get their first and show up and I always knew where he was because there'd be a full-on. Like one time, we went out to dinner and I was like where Ben and one of the service was like. Oh, he's upstairs way in the back corner and get up there and the like entire corner is just packed with people like. Just GonNa let him do his thing. I'm not going to go over there. You know what four guys I think it's. They get recognized more who? Do as women, and because it's. The audience is mostly women I. Remember I was talking to Astra one time, and she was telling me that they were doing an event in Toronto, and it was Jason. Blake back when Jason was still single, and the buying she said was wrapped around the door, and they all kind of had stations for people to come talk to them, and people were just blocking Sablan Jason, so it's it's definitely more heightened for men and I'd be very curious. To hear a been. Answer this question or I Dunno flaker, somebody else like none so. Yeah the the girls love the guys I mean even. To meet and greets, and having everyone just wanted to talk to Ben and ask him if he was still single, and all these things, and so the yeah, they they love the. have it. Can have it I. Just WanNa. Keep living my life and doing what I'm doing. The recognition is not something. Obviously, it comes with it, but if I had a choice to not be recognized. I'm cool with that. Rather not be recognized. And coming from someone who, especially if it happens at restaurants, I always have food in my teeth that it's like. You, I don't need to be recognized in that case. I have to blow my nose or something. That's when I say. Thank God for the face masks I when people are like. Is it okay if I like? Are you okay because they want to take a picture and I'm like girl I was on reality TV you saw me at my worst ugliest to snap this picture I. don't care if my on lift or lashes or whatever take the picture. Wasn't GonNa do it anyways whether you say yesterday like they're going to go and have their phones, that's. Weirds me on more like I'd rather. Have you just asked? Take one with me and smile with me then just like. Film in the corner, you know like just come look through together. I completely agree. You heard it here. First back set. Come on over. Take a picture. Aerobics. Okay people if you are like me if you are human, you have to admit that you'll love a good. NETFLIX's Chilean every now and again. You probably also like ice cream. So what happens when you mix those two things together? We'll let me tell you. It equals the perfect Friday night. Ben and Jerry's and Netflix have turned up something extra special for you all with their new pint of Netflix and chill ice cream. You can experience the magic of things that go perfectly together just. Just like you're not netflix watchlist. There's something in this pint for just about everybody. It offers the perfect mix of peanut butter intrigue, Yes sprinkle in a little pretzel drama and top it off with some fudge Brownie. Belly laughs Netflix and chill so well with any of your favorite Netflix originals stock up on your next. netflix night anywhere. Ice Cream is sold or find a new favorite flavor at Ben Jerry Dot Com. That's B. E.. N. J. T. E. R. R.. Y. Dot Com. All Right? Let's see some more questions. Oh, okay, well. We're I guess in terms of the podcast once you in terms of podcasts, and as when we were leads on the show. What episode did we have the most fun recording and filming then why? Soy. Answer this for the show are season and for the past of that's. Okay. FOR THE SEASON The best episode. Gosh I try to think of like drama filled one, but then that involves laying who? Despite. The EX girlfriend. Who did she. Did enjoy telling tomorrow off, but I'm going to be honest with you. In the moment I was not happy. That was not like going back. It was like yeah. It was a a girl power moment, but honestly in the moment I was so upset that they put me in that situation and I thought by job I remember thinking I ascended be on Jerry Springer. This isn't what show where it was like the second week, and hopefully seriously, but that was a good episode, because it was Kareem abdul-jabbar I'll have to say no. The most fun episode was was Ellen. A lot of fun just because I love Ellen to be on the show with her, she was so welcoming. Some great I had met her once before because I had done her actual talk show great with the man. She hated Brian I thought that I was sofa. She's like don't pick him. I don't know I later. This point or not, but just to see the guys open up was That was the most fun episode I will say. It was a fun day. And the women went crazy in the audience as for our podcast. Oh, we've had a lot of good episodes Mike Gosh. What would it be? I know what mine would be for the PODCAST. Well Okay Do. I have to for very different reasons. Well I I. Mean I loved Russia because Oh. Yes yes, that's just a given, but my favorite was with Neal Lane. That's it. Nothing will be and they you lake. Only recorded with him in probably the saved like an hour of conversation with him, but we were with him like much longer talking to him before and after, and he's just like this amazing ball of energy, and I forget love Neal, lane, and it was so much fun. You know that was it and I am so thankful that we were able to do that in person and not over zoom a I I don't even think we could have held his attention over. He would have been looking like. Where's the camera? But I don't know that's it. I can't have that one. There will never be another episode like delay. That is the. He is the most interesting man alive that Oh yeah, by far. Yeah so yeah, no came top him. But then. What's your favorite episode from your season? Oh Gosh. You know it was well one of my favorites, and it was one that I had asked for, and I'm so happy that they gave it to me but I really wanted a lumberjack date. And, so it was when we were in Park City in all of these guys come like with their heavy boots in their suspenders flannel, and they had to throw axes move these heavy ass logs and I'm watching them sweat and they're like trying to climb up these. Totem Poles like an get to the top, and like ring the bell and it was just so much fun. It was just like it was a nice day. We finally outdoors outside of the mansion. It was the first place we had traveled to. I think everyone just like. Was this just like these great spirits? It was just a fun like Super Interactive date where I felt like I finally really got to know the guys like away from the show kind of like we're we let loose. Yeah, so that's mine and I also for the record WANNA say that I. Through the axe smackdown on the middle of the board without any of the men did. All that was my date. We all know women do a better. We all know that I think though the best dates or the most fun days are the ones towards the beginning because they're so lighthearted. When you get to demand, things get so heavy as you're letting people go that you care about. At even though you appreciate them, they're fun. They're more meaningful. The ones at the beginning it's doesn't as we still don't know where we're getting into all figuring out this journey, ourselves figure out who each other are so much. It's like the first phase of college. Away from your family and your like. Can Happen. All for everybody, it's so great. It's so great. Okay? What was the best and worst part about your time being the Bachelorette? Oh best and worst. Well I'll leave with the worst just because I want to save the best for last It's just a I don't think people realize how. You're always on. You're constantly filming I mean of course every week you tune in every Monday you see a two hour episode, but you're filming almost four seven. It's very exhausting like you. You just are always on for the guy in the interviews and so. That part like. It's chaotic for two months straight. Basically, you really don't sleep for two months. That was probably. The hardest worst part I would say, and then, of course I mean the. Crying on camera is never fun. Best part though I mean, we'll have to lead with of course weaning Garrett and maybe my partner, that's number one hands down but then I think forming the friendships with the girls during the bachelor season that are Selassie and then friendships with the producers like they some of them I still stay in touch with we talk constantly we so see and that's the thing where i. I think a lot of people think like the producers are evil and manipulative, and it just has this bad connotation. That's not true like are some amazing people, and some really lifelong friendships formed from that, so that's probably another one of the best things that came from it. Yeah, I think for me I'll do like y'all end on the the good one the worst part for me. Me was sending when he got to that halfway point sending people home because I underestimated how difficult it was to send people home I, thought I don't know yet. It won't. It won't be anything to just send you home. At least you'll know you know before I take you all the way to the end and your feelings or to invest it. I was wrong, because even if. If, you don't develop that love for them, you develop a friendship right, and so you have this person who's pouring their heart out to you sharing intimate details about their life and you know you're not going to keep them. That was so difficult to me to encourage you to open up, but at the same time. No, this is only going to go to a certain point. I you cannot prepare yourself for letting someone down in that way. You also just can't prepare yourself for the feelings that you're just gonNA develop. You just don't know have to get into it, but you have to be president. You have to put yourself out there, because otherwise you kind of cheat yourself from the experience. The, best thing, obviously, it's meeting Brian, but honestly because I was so skeptical about it I mean I was open to love, but I was more so like I'm going to represent myself as a black woman. And maybe I'll find love is out. There's no way they're gonNA find somebody for me on the show, and I was beautifully surprised and I'm so happy that you know I took a chance that I was. Was Open, and then I found Brian at the end of the day and it's changed my life completely in every single way, my life has changed you better, and that's the thing there's so much that comes from it of course like all these crazy opportunities, but but the people that you meet along the way in those opportunities like Rachel. You're just like you're all over the world meaning people like I. What's Van us and there were thought I was gonNA. Meet Michael Strahan and. Food not too long ago. which was very jealous? I think. About it but like had I not been on the show I would have never probably met hammer all these other cool amazing people, so it's it's very special in that way. Yeah, so next question and I think this is a good one because I felt like I. Get this a lot, not just from our bachelor. Happy our listeners, but just like an everyday life this is. Is One of the big questions people have when they stop you on the street or want to know something about the show. They're like Oh my God. You're on the bachelor. Okay, let's talk about Chris Harrison people want to know. How involved was Chris Harrison in your seasons? Did he actually act as a sounding board and help you, or is it all just a facade? I actually never asked you this back. I'm very garris to how involve Chris was with you. Chris I would say Chris was. Like my safety net that if I would ever get. Overwhelmed I always knew he was there and had my back like He. He does genuinely care. One thing about Chris, set I obviously never realized until I met him. Being on the show was just how witty and funny he is I mean. He is constantly on like he can just like. So sharp he just kept me laughing especially in the moments when I was very stressed and anxious and overwhelmed he just he was that person I think it was one of my most special times with him was the very last week it was in the Maldives I only had Garrett and Blake left, and I was really really struggling with just knowing the gravity of the decision I had to make, and I was so. Named with I, didn't WANNA hurt anyone? You know of course I was overwhelmed with this feeling of love for these guys is just a lot like I literally felt like I was Gonna burst in half with. All of the emotion and there was one day where. We're in the Maldives and we have all these little huts along the water. And when you're on the show, you don't really have much alone time. You're always with people who you're always either filming or prepping whatever it might be and so there is one moment where they're like. Okay. You have waiting for the cameras you have an hour and so I actually snuck away and I knew Chris's hut was like around the corner for Mine and he was with carry the stylist and Gr amazing makeup artist, and I saw them all floating out in the water and I'm like. Like I'm going to sneak away. And I I knew I was going to get so in trouble for sneaking away from everyone, but I was like I just see moment of just normal in this chaotic thing, and so I swam over I, was actually walking on all these seashells I think I'd bloodied up my feet a little bit just trying to like go to Chris but I just hung out on the raft with him for an hour and just talks about life and everything and he. He in that moment I think I, needed it because I was about to lose my mind, and he just talked me through some things he he's really gonna about in inserting his. You know previous contestants situation soon to be like. Don't feel bad. Don't get down on yourself. Don't feel hard like this is. This is normal and he just feel. It kept me sane and then. I got back and they're like. Where were you? Where'd you here? We have so much to do and I was like. Like. Oh, I was just with Chris and they're like Oh. Okay? I couldn't technically get in trouble because it was, but he is very present at least for me. He was very president and helped me so so much in a lot of that was never shown, but it was really special. Yeah, I think when when I asked. When you get this question, you think Oh. Is He helping you pick the guys Mike. I experienced a similar to yours of course. I wasn't in the Maldives floating on. Your inspired drinking wine I was but. I don't know if you know this. is where if like you had a dream location? That's where. All she just told me I had to wait one more season. They hit the ball dis. No, but I for me with Chris in this okay. I didn't know you were GONNA. Compliment Chris the way you did it, because what I was GONNA, say! I found out that Chris and I really have very similar personalities, but not like I'm bragging because you were like. Oh, he's witty and he's smart I'm like that's not what I necessarily. We'll so Rachel I'm more so just. You know we don't know Chris. When you're a contested on the show he comes in. He comes out so once you become the lead your with a whole new set of people who travel a day early. It's completely different I. Don't know if you guys know that so. What you get to spend more time with Chris, and so what I realized is he is very sarcastic museum in like a diplomatic way, put cover. Yes, and he's a lot more loose, and so I found that very refreshing, but he is a sounding board to answer your question and more so similar. What Becca was saying about life? I didn't sit there and say hey. Chris, who do you think I should choose? It was more. More like how do you navigate all this? When it's over, it's going to be so overwhelming. Your life is about down. I WANNA go back to some sense of normalcy. How do I do that would have other contestants done. Have you given them advice I? Don't WANNA lose myself in this process and forget who I am and I think. Chris is amazing at doing that and he's such a straight shooter, and that's what I. I need someone to just say you know what this is what it is. This is how it is, and so he is great for that, so he really is just like a life coach. All because you're in such a whirlwind living in this bachelor bubble, you really don't even know. When you when it's over, you're like okay now. What how do I put my shoes on? How do I? How do I take math I? Don't know. How do I use my phone one? That's the thing that I think we should touch on to everyone because when we're filming. We don't have our phones. We don't have all these normal things. You always have somebody. Taking care of your schedule where you have to be when you have to be there. All of your flights so. One of the hardest things coming off at the show for me was just to get back to normal like how do I function? I remember the second. I was given my phone and left at the airport. Alone I had such anxiety. I was like I. Don't know what I went to the wrong airport. I was like I lived. As a human happens to me. I had to commit. Worry 'em right now. No, I sat with my phone in my hand when I was on the bachelor, and it was over with and I was in Finland partly because the election. It just happened and I was like I'm not really. I heard that was a depressive. In the Finnish people were like we have great seasonal jobs in a might have to take. I, just sat with my phone in my hand, staring at was afraid. Turn it on and I was afraid of all the messages I have it then. My phone really did this thing where none of my text messages came through to lead after a while. Yeah, like okay. I'm good, but I don't WanNa look on the Internet I was just scared Okay? Yes all that to say yes, you lose yourself in this process it's it's a scary situation and go back to reality. You know I just remember. Even even this is trivial, but by pop culture news I found somebody who passed away that I didn't even know he's like you miss. You're not only in this world. Right like we're. We're in Carolina you care, bears fan? Thanks to seek him a lot of. CARE. No, you are! You're in this fina. SEAWORLD has it's a really much harder transition. I thought personally coming back than I ever could have imagined. And then when you find someone, you are so excited and you want to tell everybody. Oh, my Gosh I found the love of my life and I'm engaged. I've never been engaged. You know it's you're so excited, but you can't really tell. Let me see. Let me sift through some of these when you were on the bachelor. Or the Bachelorette was it no bachelor when you're on, the bachelor was awkward, making friends with other women on the show knowing you were all making out with the same do. Well I. I feel like I'm just really weird. And of course, it's weird like it's not comfortable, but you. You get so close with these girls that you've I felt I especially I had a stronger bond with some of the girls and I did the bachelor, and so I would joke with them like our sister wise, we would just make light of the situation because let's everyone knows what's going on. You don't always want to see it So. Yeah, I mean. I think I was like a little bit. Not as affected, you talk fantasy suites with the other girls. Like when we win in the fetus lightens. Of y'all. Happen at that point. Okay, see. Did you were way to open, so we were so excited for each other. If something would happen, we've girl. Did you make out with him, did you? Did you use tong and I remember Alexis Alexis. She was like I gave him the Lizard. Tongue and we were like what does that and she was like I. Just grabbed my tongue. He blocked with his teeth and Lizard tongue them. Is that. We I mean I. Don't know why it's weird I know it sounds incestuous. Maybe because there's not that much to talk about your whole life. Is this one guy and these girls are your only friends and the producers of your family members. It's kind of the. Research. I mean really. That's the setup in the world, and so we always did, but we talked about so I remember I would. People who were like I'm very reassured throughout the whole thing I would get dates. I'd get group rose dates, and everyone would say like how you keep getting roses, and so when we were off days, we were always like I was teaching the girls to work, so we would like to work on the walls. We spoke on the bus and I was like. How do you keep getting these roses? What do you think I do in my one on one time with Nick I just like I. I would get in people like that and I was like it's over when it comes to the fantasy suite, you guys. You could all just go home after I. don't even have sex with nick and the fantasy suite, but I would say random things like that to people, and we would talk about what we will do. We get there and I feel like. Yes, we'll know that you like I thought you meant like after the fantasy suite moment you talk about it with other girls but. But. Weren't you separated from everyone? So that happen? Even I had it was me Raven, Vanessa and we had this thing. I remember before we were like we're going to be eskimo sisters. We kept saying that to each other, and so when I saw her when we were in that rose ceremony. And, so we were the first to out or no, maybe even us out of that point I don't even know, and we're just standing there and I just turn it I look at her, and they keep going show. came. Yet. Another behind the scenes thing, and so I turn I, look at her, and we both just look, and we'd just start laughing at you and she's like no, she's like you. And I was like no, Dang it we didn't. We didn't get as. We got like laughing looked at each other. No, we'll find at that specific moment because I think I was brought into that rose ceremony last, and then he brought kindle away right away, so it's like we couldn't even talk but no before we were all super open. I mean like you have to keep in mind people. You're living in a mansion or these houses with people that you get really close to like. There's not much privacy everyone. Is Easy I don't know if it was the same for yours like all, the were walking around naked, like it was just like it was like a Sorority, and so you just get really close with the girls, and so of course you make jokes like that I think was the best about I mean. I was new. She was joking and so I would never get upset like I could definitely see some girls be like. Oh, well, he's mine. Don't talk. Yeah, there's always some of them. There is seventy nine thousand of US girls in this house. We all know what's happening. We're all kissing the same dude. We're all going for him, so it's like. You gotTA. Know what you're getting yourself into and I think that that's a huge success for survival on the show, and it's actually it's unfortunate, because part of the journey is making these lasting friendships. I I know you're still friends with girls from the season that you're on and so am I and They're so apart of my life and ingrained in my life I can't even imagine not. Having those those friendships, right? You know because you just go through something together and you really learn a lot about each other really fast. Really bonds you in a special way like of special weird way, okay, this is a good one. And I bride I. Talk About this all the time. Actually some really curious about you get. If, you hadn't become the Bachelorette. Would you have gone on Paradise if they ask you and then also think if you hadn't chosen garret, do think Garrett would have gone on Paradise. Devos one thousand Percent Garrett would've never gone in. Paradise came hell. No, would you? Okay here's the thing. Before the bachelor season. I had never watched paradise until probably a week before I left, and one of my friends showed me one episode and I think it was the one where the twins came in. And I was like I was very scared. I was like what the Bachelor is going to be like I like they just seemed very mean, and I was so scared and so I would have said in that moment. No, but then I went on the Bachelor, met all these great fun girls that I was like Hell Yeah I'd go in paradise like we'll spend the summer together on the beach in like well. Why not but? Yeah if you like. No I don't I. Don't think I would have lasted very long paradise if I'm being honest. I get sunburnt to easily. Okay, so it's so funny that you say off a thousand or one hundred percent Garrett would not have gone a thousand percent. Bryan would have gone on Paradise Really. Absolutely I and I tell them we'll watch it. I'm like I. Saved You. You would have gone on this show. I say that to him all the time. Yeah I would not have gone paradise because. I was still practicing law at the time. And that's why I almost said no to Bachelorette because I didn't want to jeopardize my career in paradise just has a different connotation than the Bachelor Bachelorette, and so I felt like if I go on this I'm going to jeopardize my job. that. I would have I, say I you never say never, but I don't think I would have got on the show unless there was just somebody I was just really into and looking forward to meeting, but Brian will, you could have just alstead and slide into their DM's. I don't do that. I like now I. Just I don. I didn't even know I had DM's. Until six months into the Bachelorette being over I, didn't even know it deems as I'm telling you I'm are dinosaur. When it comes to, you saw what just happened when we did that. Live while back. or No but Brian. I think Brian is such. Your minds. He's like Peter in some ways very hopeful, very romantic, very optimistic and I think he would have and he likes the show. A fan of the show. There's no secret to that. So I. Think he would've wanted to go to see what the experience was I. Yeah to Meet New People to be hopeful. Oh loved it and work out with this this way I wanted to see if I can give my all to someone else I. really he would have gone interesting. You wonder like what who? Like, who would I try to think like I'm the only girl in the world for garrison. My Cudi Heave. Go for like. No one because it's not me, that's how I. I yeah, that's and that's how we have to think. okay next question. What's the most surprising thing you learned about yourself from being the Bachelorette? From being the Bachelorette. Oh Man I I would say two things one. would be and this is kind of like post. Bachelorette just in the world that we live in now that it's okay to say no to things and end to take time for yourself into not say 'cause. There's a lot that comes from it and I found myself like I for my sanity. I I have to say no. That's just a side thing I would. I think though from actually being on the show. It's that Just to be more decisive in my decision to apologize for that, it's very easy when you're the lead especially because you're sending guys home, you're breaking their hearts. You're hurting them in a way. And to and to know that they're gonNA. Be Okay and that you'll be okay and to just stand by what you feel. It's not apologize because it. Everyone goes through things like that. Everyone has to pick and choose at times So, did just stop saying sorry if moments are uncomfortable, yeah! I, think for me, it was. Not, being so controlling I learned to let myself go I. Try to control every situation and this was the situation. I really couldn't and the only way that this was going to work because I knew what I wanted. Deep down inside was to let myself go, and just let things happen and see where the chips fall. Yep, goes and so. I struggle with that in real life right, but that world allows you to do that and if I hadn't I never would have been able to find Brian and so I'm really glad that I was you know it's it's such. As crazy as the bachelor world is, if through therapy if I, ain't gonNA therapy before I had been on the show I do not think I would have survived it, but definitely I I mean truly. I'll I was GONNA say is that world allows you to just let yourself go. Because the only thing that you can be present in is with yourself, and how you're feeling and focusing on the men that are in front of you what you really want for yourself, and if in the real world there's so many other distractions, and so if you let yourself go, and you trust the process, even if it doesn't work for you, it is truly the most beautiful learning experience because I remember coming out. Out of the Bachelor, it didn't work for me, but I remember thinking I know exactly what I want for myself in what's missing out of my life? Right Hands Down Because I've taken the time to focus on me and in real life I? Do not do that right so wanNA learn to be a little selfish and focus on me, and then to just to let go and not control everything. Yeah and things can still work out when you don't do that. I mean when you do that, lady. I've never seen frozen. I have not. For the only other person I swear, and now it's to the point where I'm kind of happy that I haven't because if I ever have to play, the never have over again. That's how you get everyone outrage. Wait the never have I ever gained you get every? That now. Never really quick. Three fingers, I I'll I'll lose really quickly I might though what are the? What's the topic anything you just have to say never have ever and if you've done it, you put a finger down. Okay, do you WanNa serve Me To you START K.! Well the only thing I could have gone you out with was the frozen thing okay, never? Have I ever been in a blimp? Love I know. Oh yeah, okay, so we're doing the bachelor at Latch Slash Bachelor addition addition. Okay Yeah. blimps and that was a really special moment. Can I say guys because? I child. We used to drive. Pass this place and there was a blimp that was sitting in this trailer and as a kid I would always say bill. Bill, I was obsessed with Blimps, so the fact that I got to go on one on the season and production didn't even know that it was like a real thing for me. Yep. anyways okay. Bevere have I ever. Oh Gosh. Never have I ever gotten it on in a hot tub. On on the show. But I never have Danny. I don't know. I don't think my season I don't think I went in a hot tub with anyone. Lucky you. There were no hot tubs. It's weeded. Three hot tubs. They had okay. No, here's one thing. During my second, my second no I had. Oh, yeah, Oh, my second one on one day with Colt in the night. He told me he was a virgin bike. That whole conversation! Instead of a hot TUB. was a bathtub filled up. With hot water and rose pedals, and there's like I'm not I'm not doing that. He just told me he was a virgin I'm not about to get an a bathtub that was. In Myself, explicit at least like Like not a regular bath with the shower head in it was at least like it was like a Nice Jacuzzi. Room, but but it wasn't big. No Okay I've another one. While I'd have to put a finger down, but I don't know I'm just like. Did you will affect fine. I'll play the game member ever and I have them have I ever had a too hot for TV moment on my season. was there like a hot moment that didn't air. There was. There was a time it was with Garrett. The Bahamas will you share yours after yeah? So guaranteed I, it was it was the week before hometowns and we had our day. We had like our dinner together. And the. Okay, we'll let you guys go into the ocean together, so we win in rams though Shen, and it's nighttime, and of course like you have the cameras you know the camera and like the team is still standing on the beach, but yourself are out there. You're not like. It was like it was legiter I I'm not might together where we felt alone and so we stayed out there for quite some time. And it's nice and we heard them yelling coming. We gotta go 'cause. We are out there forever. And Gary and I were just like. Having fun in the in the ocean, hanging out like. Pretending to ignore them, and so then we. I don't know if this should be aired, but. We'll then when we walked back up on the beach, Garrett, of course like had to kind of readjust like walking backwards a little bit, so the cameras didn't get everything, but that was. The only time that we. Were really like alone together besides fantasy sweets I mean we were into like a car together, but that doesn't count. The Ocean would've been really nice. We didn't have that Brian and I. had a a hot tub moment that never aired. And we in Spain, and the the narrative on the date, and it was, it was a weird date. I was like not in the right head space. What you saw really was true, but then we had this moment in the hot tub that it was a brian literally fantasy sweetser tonight. Can you just wait I feel? Like that and it was so awkward because it's not like we were away in the ocean. was good, but it was awkward as cameras were right there, and you can see all in the water and I'm like literally fantasy is tonight. The night. Hour wait a few hours. Yes, they'll never aired I. I really think it was too much for TV. I really. But you know what at least these are the men that we chose, and these are the stories that we have to tell the world side Gary night. Breaker had so I feel. Really off limits at this point well Rachel that was so much fun. Thank you guys for writing in you know. Don't let this be a one and done. Because hopefully we can keep this going like i. said at the beginning, so keep writing to us. Ask Any questions, and hopefully we can do these every couple of weeks because I, feel like it's just a fun. Memory Lane for us right. So yeah, so we cannot thank you guys enough for supporting us and just being the best fans ever. We want to continue to get you guys more involved in our episodes. An answers money questions as we can as well as keep inviting guests and covering topics that you guys are interested in so not only in your questions, but any topics to would love to hear from. From you with that being said, keep writing to us. Don't hold back on your thoughts, questions, suggestions, criticisms anything because we are listening and hearing you guys. Yes, and we know you guys know where to find us because you sent such great questions, but if you're renewed, Sebastian happy hour. Maybe you haven't maybe a little scared to send in a question or or anything. Anything like that. Let me tell you where to find us. You can find us at Bachelor. Happy Hour on Instagram and at Bash, happy hour on twitter and facebook always always always please subscribe to our podcast on Apple podcasts spotify over ever. You're listening to this right now and one last thing before we go I want to say this because we need this, you guys. Guys who put this out on Instagram? We need a name for our listeners will totally shout out the person who gives us the name. We will give you credit because we need something to call you guys, you know. keeps saying listeners. You're more than that to us, so we WANNA. Keep nickname for you guys all right? That's your homework for now until next time. Guys?

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At Home with Comedian, Jared Freid

Velvet's Edge

37:29 min | 7 months ago

At Home with Comedian, Jared Freid

"This is Kelly Henderson and you are listening to at home on the velvets edge. Podcasts my guest. This week is comedian. Jared frayed jared's INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT. And memes have been the silver lining for me to some dark days during this isolation periods so. I thought he would be the perfect guest to give us all something to laugh about. He's the host of the J train podcast which I was a guest on. He's also the CO host of the U up. Podcast with the girls from batches. Obviously stand up. Tour has been put on hold during this pandemic so we talked about how he is handling isolating in New York City moving in with his girlfriend and of course the bachelor. Here's our conversation all right. So you're in New York. What in the world is it like right now. Well it's so funny like New York is fine okay. But I'm also not working in a hospital. You Know I. I'm in a very luxurious position. But it is funny that when I talked going outside and you're like how is it going there and I'm like it's fine. It's just Very quiet I'm not waiting through bodies in the streets route like that and It's actually there's parts of being in New York that are probably that I enjoy better like the fact that I can go out for a walk and you know there are coffee places. That are open. There's a day go to you. Know there's there's a little more going on here than people would assume considering you know the numbers and how New York has become like the you know the top corona virus place in some regard right. I just imagine it to be so kind of eerie feeling even just because New York is so busy all the time. Yeah that's well. That's it's eerie to look like. I live in an apartment building to look out on the street. Yeah morning and just see no cars. Nobody's moving in and out of the city like I moved so I moved in with my girlfriend mid Quarantine. Wow dictate is yes. So I moved in with my girlfriend and You know the stressful part was all the stuff leading into it. We'll people canceled last-second. Well we get our couches will the they'll do it. How do you do but You know but then once you got to move it was actually easier. Because there's no traffic you could park. The truck could be parked outside. Always beeping at you being like the fuck out of the way like it. Actually you know in in this is it's so tough because we live in this world of black and white and the reality is all nuanced and in the in between so like some people's lives are better in quarantine and no one wants to admit that because then someone comes and goes to people are dying and my grandma and it's like and it's like no obviously that's that obviously. I know that I'm an adult. I had parents that brought me up. I'm closer to you than any you know. We're all closer to one another's feelings. I'm just saying that a mover when I looked at the movers and I was like what is like. And they're like there's no traffic it's great you know. Come and go ahead. I'm sorry I was just GonNa say my boyfriend says all the time and he's living his best life right now. I think if you can pay your bills it's like it's not that bad and the thing is no one you know this whole talk of like who's privilege and where do you rank on the privilege map. It's like no one can ever tell you. Life is okay so like everyone has to go online. Go on their instagram and be like in these trying times. We must come together. And it's like fuck you bitch you. You had a job before and now all of a sudden you're team us like that's the other thing like all these people that like had no job now are quarantined. And it's like. Oh No oh. Now they get to the home. If you've got to tell me this is an easy decision for you. It wasn't an easy decision forever. Like my shows do stand up at night. I every night. My shows had to get postponed and cancelled. Like you know you know it wasn't easy. You know to say that I was like okay time to stay home. I wasn't that way. I was always annoyed. I was fucking pissed. I I I am ready to do shows right now you know so it's like All of this is more gray than we. All you have to take time to understand and I understand. The easy thing is like you know to live in the black or white. And you know it's like when you see like when you see these people with seven homes and they're like I'm at. We're all in this together from their pool. You're like no no no not no not in the same boat here. Yeah so like an insight. You know what you know. The social media is a hot Mike at the front of the room. Yeah yeah everyone feels like they gotta give a speech like some. Sometimes you just don't we don't need to hear from you like we don't have to hear from the fifth bridesmaid at the wedding. I can hear from one maid of honor and maybe one close friend as the rehearsal dinner. And that's it. I WANNA know what so. You moved in with your girlfriend during this time like a job in planning that before this happened. We're playing up before department ready. Okay the you know the the thing that sucks about it is like no I you know. We have our arguments and you like any couple dozen. You're like is this quarantine or is this is. This is the new reality. Yeah so it's like I. You know the tough thing is like my job is literally a Joe. I am hey to make jokes. You know it's It's tough because like if I have worked. Traffic comes up which you know you calling me a work thing. Yeah we're talking about you know we're we're having fun talking on the phone. She hears that and she's like that's what you do for work while method fucking important. Shut the fuck up. I knew with math. That's that's Kinda tough and especially because we had a week where we were living in my place and then she added a place downtown and she was in a studio so we had a week. Were in a studio. That was a little tough like. I took a lot of long hoops and that was going on. Yeah and but then now. We're in a one bedroom together and that's you know easier and you know that's nicer. I you know I I. It's the one it's the moment where I'm thankful I'm I'm like an thirty five and didn't have kids yet. I'm like thank God. There isn't some kid in the back of my zoom meeting right. Dad Dad you know I You know everyone's situation's different and like you know. Life is hard for everyone. So you know our our our squabbles. Like like her birthday was while we were in the studio apartment was her birthday so she went and like had social distance drinks with their friends at a feel she went into that and while she was out. I cleaned up the apartment a little bit and I put out a glass Bala Champagne I put out a card and then I lit like a candle and when she comes back Yeah I was like when she goes back. I'll be like have you start the. It was the night before her birthday so I think let's start the birthday. You know what I mean and she comes back and you know she does. At first she was like this is so nice. Oh my God thank you then. A couple of drinks center and then at one point. She's like I can't believe you just lit that candle. I'm like what and she's like. I don't know I mean who has the confidence to just light a candle in someone else's home and I'm like wait what I was like. What are you talking about? She's like one of the Nice candle like that's kind of like a candle that I don't like wait a minute. That's a candle. You don't lie and at that point it's called an art installation okay. It's not that's not a I I've never. I'm not familiar with the no light candles so it was just. I guess so neo. That colleges the candle that you're not like what price of a candle makes it not liable five. Is it a five hundred dollar candle because Violence Our candle yes. I'm mad at myself writing. I'm mad at you for being the person who buys a five hundred dollar candles so I I'm mad for a number of so now we're fighting about a candle I Like we're arguing the scandals. He gets what don't get lead. And then she you know we we go over this in the studio and And I tweet about it. 'cause I'm like that's what I do when I'm like? This is a funny fight so tweet about the scandal and I put it on Instagram and I get a message being like. Hey I run a piano company. I love the things that you do. Can I send you on your girlfriend? Kansas candles so I got free cans and I'm like this is so nice I tell her I'm like how great is this girl. She is a candle company and she's a follower and she wants to send US Canada. I was like Reagan so I go. She goes so I said I was like thank you so much and I send and she goes. What's your address? I give her my address for the new apartment and she goes. You're she goes. Are you kidding me? The person candle person she's like. Are You fucking kidding me? I was like what she's like. That's my exact address last apartment. That's the apartment next to me. Oh my your neighbor exactly. So I'm like no fucking way. She was like yes. This is so crazy I was like same floor in the same. God Can you imagine? And so now like she's like she dropped off at her like it's and then like we're moving in on like winter. Is this candle. Check like looking for and we end up moving our window. You can literally like the building like an L. You can see into the girl's apartment like it's like Kinda crazy. My God corona virus. Really just bringing everybody together exactly handles and corona in KUNA long. It's great you said I. Will you brought up the fact that she post everything on instagram twitter? And like I personally something about being isolated as you obviously are on social media a lot more. I need a laugh like especially if you get sucked into the news. So one of your accounts my favorite just because the mediums. And you always are posting about your podcast. You have these rants. You do about corona virus. So what is this about like? Are you just irritated with people are? What's the deal? Well I think you know I am a Mike Comedy standup up that I do is just all luxury issues. I don't have real problems and I'm fine with it and I'm fine with admitting like I'm happy that I don't have real problems but I what I love to talk about on stage or the problems. That aren't problems. The candles to insult the candle situation to me is my wheel. Yeah and I think My job on earth is to be fun and I think you know. I think what people what happens during times like these is like people forget the job you had before corona virus the job we want you doing during a Job. We want you doing after so people think that. Oh I have a following so now. It's my turn to be a politician. No now now brown cow it is your turn to be about model still. We still need. But we only yeah. Yeah so I'm not GonNa like all of a sudden change what I do just because of what's going on to me. I can help people by doing what I did before. And may trying to be funny so what? I what I try to do. Is On my podcast? Which is now daily. I went from twice a week to five times a week. And Yeah so. We take emails and then every episode. I blow some steam of mild something that is related to what's going on and listen. I'm not going on there being like like these are thought out rants. I'm I'm I'm but I'm I'm trying to speak for the silent majority. That's that's really what I do and everything. I'm trying to speak for the person the the you know. When you see an influencer on instagram post. Something from their third house and tell you how we're all in this together like it's not worth your time to like comment on the thing. It is worth my time to speak up for the people who have real jobs and they have you know. Have other things to do and be funny about so. That's where it came from like I'm going to rant about the things. We're all thinking that really nobody has time to say. I've got the time right. So you got all the time all the time in the world today sect. How annoying it is that people are baking banana bread. They've been vacant banana bread their whole lives. Yeah the what bothers me about the banana. Bread isn't that they're making good for you. But like this like subtle omission. That you've reprobate before in your life like and and this is where a lot of women do this. We'll they'll be like. Oh let me just which up and it's like something like you spend your whole fucking day on this. You googled how to do this. Yes you didn't just reach in your back pocket like you did go to the market. You didn't have a bunch of flower. You didn't have a bunch of Old Bananas. You don't just like Oh. I just picked a banana. So my banana tree ran this. All An instagram is is is the like the king of that stuff everything on instagram subtly. Oh myths reality of life it subtly amid the dirty kind of icke parts of life where you're like. Yeah I just wanted to do. I just want to bake this banana bread so I can show it to my friends and show them that. I'm not a fucking loser like them like so that's so every day. I try to rant about something new or I'll do a thing called the luxury lounge where I complain about. A luxury issue And then today the luxury lounge today was that The pouring my own drinks like talking no just like I know. It's a luxury for me to go to the fridge my drink. But I don't WanNa do that because I don't have the stopper at the top of my you know bottle of vodka. I can count off like you can't even do that. Three count so I do the three count. And it's like Gluck Gluck gluck and then I go and then every time you stop pouring you pour a little more so it's like I don't WanNa pour my own drinks anymore. It's fucking annoying so I and then I do a church cury chat right Chitchat about charcuterie. Because that's my real passion is it. I didn't know this about you. Yes I am a big fan of the charcuterie. Okay will you. Also you're a big fan of the bachelor. Would you describe yourself as a fan of the bachelor? I mean you love to hate on it right. I'm a huge fan of the bachelor. I love the show. I like to comment on the show that I love so much. I and okay. I'm watching. I'm watching listen to your heart. Nashville's representative exactly. Are you getting things? Called live screams you promote it are you. You're talking about the show as it's happening. So what are you thinking about this? Listen to your heart show like give me the the whole. I actually like it. I I wasn't so I I live screen. I put on my instagram stories. I just watched the show and I commented that's going on and I wasn't planning on watching with your heart and then the quarantine happened. I'm like I gotta fill some time so now I'm watching. What's your art and I liked the show because the bachelor The the the the bachelor this whole idea of like you're not there for love is like you know kind of like a background noise on the bachelor. You're on a date. The Bachelor's later. Yeah Yeah what I like about. Listen to your heart. Is it a lot of it? Is about that these guys on the show. WanNa be touring musician right like so like they do. They are there for to think right and they can admit to it so I kinda like it. So what they've done is like the first two episodes they did it like Bachelor in paradise where it was like okay matchup and whoever does it have a partner at the end of the day. I called genital musical chairs. And so like. If you don't have a genital you better leave the show I do episodes. They like they like got rid of people and now they're down to couple and then the last episode Chris Harrison was like you. Better be serious with someone. Because if you win with the YOU'RE GONNA MATCH-UP WITH ONE PERSON. And if you wouldn't them you're gonNA four the country together. Okay answer well. Then it turned into American idol and they did like each duet went up and sang and they were one of the things that they were ranked. Judged on was their compatibility as musicians. Looked like they were in. Love or yeah. And that's I kinda like I kinda liked that it turned into like America like Jason Mraz is one of the judges and cash And commentary about them. Yes and Joe Joe. Who's a former Bachelorette? She was on my favorite. I did enjoy the music aspect I do like how it's like a change up and it's on the same like like the bachelor master at like you know the beach. You know okay. So then they go on a date. This gates. Don't even matter. I just WanNa see them saying and see if they sucker now like you. Ju and the the thing is you do see that. They are not really that compatible. Saw you point out that they keep putting at the end of each episode the thing about Claire Crawley or whatever like find any guys like. Have they always done this or did I just not enough? I didn't notice it or is it like worse with her. So Claire Crawl is going to be the next bachelor at yeah. She's famously thirty eight years old now. Thirty nine people are acting like this aim tent. I mean if that is the big joke well the the the thing is like I make fun of it. Because her season hasn't stopped paint right now when they can. I have always been on the side of I always thought the Bachelorette should be like late thirties. Early forties wants divorce okay. Can I wouldn't know what they want. Well and then I and then I wanted it to be older men like that was like I wanted to be like fifteen above men with thirty eight year old woman inches because I thought that was a that would be a better show. In a more realistic watch the thing about the bachelor the Bachelorette better than the Bachelorette because the bachelors. You know thirty women that are in their twenties looking to get married like. That's kind of a believable clock. My and then but then the Bachelorette is like thirty men in their twenties trying to get married like the. Yeah so you kind of know on the Bashar. He's going to do well right away. 'cause like they'll be an older guy who like a little bit more serious and it's like the I always thought had twenty furling twenties. One is probably the worst representation of the female race car. And and it's an air because it's it's a little embarrassing which is fine but the unfair party. The most embarrassing form of the male species is midlife crisis. So I kinda lie so I kinda liked that the that older bachelorette night offer are like the most embarrassing. It would kind of like even things up. God I'd never thought about this right. If you've got a divorce has a company that is semi retired whereas still there. Yeah we're exactly where sneakers jeans shirts with the Paisley under the cuff. Like you know that guys like I wanna see that embarrassment. Oh my God. I'm cringing thinking about it right. That's that's the male version of the girl who goes through goes I. It's high birthday months like that's the male version of campaign. So I I. But then they can't show and it was all younger. Guys layer on a fucking suck. Yeah it doesn't I think so so then when they stopped paving I think they saw an opportunity to kind of like add. Some people show. So that's why they keep coming on. Listen to your heart. And they're like hey if you want to submit the Bachelorette so I keep making the Joe Find One man boy and it's like I'm joking. It's it's funny because I put up to host and one was like me making fun of how Jason Mraz like baby and I baby like a toddler and a hat and then like there. Was this one girl that was like I liked the Jason Mraz joke. I don't like the thirty eight year old player joke. And it's like. Oh you like jokes when they don't relate to you eight year old single I if anyone think thirty eight years old. They're out of their fucking lines. Y'All so everyone is stupid so but I I do enjoy all the shows. I like you know these shows on a big scale are stupid but the small fun like like like the small moment like this on this. Listen to your heart show like this girl. Julia got dumped by one of the guys and then she stayed on the show because she's got a guy that is obsessed with her so she put one guy in the friend zone and then she keeps talking shit about the guy who dumped her and his new relationship. A fun thing the why. Yeah also. It's like for me every I say this every season. I'm like I'm not GonNa Watch this season. I don't like that person. I'm not going to get sucked in. But it's like you you sit there and you're so for me. I'm so shocked at the absurdity. Most of the time that I hate myself watching it but I can't stop either. There's nothing there. Hey you know like I just mentioned maybe you know we hate you ever watch like full. House growing. Of course you know and the full house episodes When they teach the lessons in the music change I used to get the feeling. I would always like. Try to change the channel. Because I'm like well I don't WanNa feel like I connect with the same goes for a lot of people with the bachelor and Bachelorette you connect with kind of like the worst part. The crazy your humanity. That's true because I watch these twenty seven girls and I'm like I know I did stupid shit like that but I would like that. Yeah and it feels like it's like when you watch the scene like in a Rom Com from high school in your life and it's like someone being evil highs when you're like oh I remember having those thoughts like I was such a stupid fucking idiot. Yeah it's amazing okay. So you have two podcasts. Let's talk about him. I actually was a guest on the J. Turnpike which was so fun and we broke down. And you have so many of these Listeners right in with very serious questions. A lot of romantic questions but we went through a couple those. I remember Answering they're so fun. What else do you talk about on the J train podcast? It's physically any me. Take any email and give advice so young right in with any so. It's like most of them are dating relationships. Just because that's the kind of group that I That follows me yeah And that's what they're worried about but like you get roommate stuff you get stuff with your you know family stuff but it's really just like I'm not an expert You know you're not an expert either but it's just people giving perspective and like there's nowhere easier to be honest and on a podcast right because we don't have you know like we don't have to see their faces. We see an email and we don't even have to relate it to are. You can tell your own stories that relate to it but you can just give advice and that's kind of what we do it and it's I know for me like I think the best you know. You know the best P The I think the reason the podcast exists in. Why so many people right in is people are really good at giving advice And a lot of times friends aren't good at giving advice because and family because friends and family use the history they know about you against you a lot of times so like no situation has just taken for what it is like. You'll be like wow. I dated this guy and they'll be like well you. You have set you. You go home with a lot of guys on a first date and then they just tell you my story so takes the situation. Yeah and like I have people that comment like my instagram isn't just podcast is also like people who like other stuff but I do so. It's interesting because all post stuff and I can see the worst parts of people respond to them. Because like and I'll and I know right away. Why the PICA suggests because so like I posted something where someone can't remember. What was the email was like something where the the person will be like? They're feeling anxiety about their relationships. And it's like someone wrote well. I guess someone's not very confident and I'm like get nobody's confidence. We all have our own. We have yeah we all have insecurities and like all it takes is for you to feel like you're vulnerable to you. Know to not be sure what to do or do the wrong things that there's nothing easier than giving advice. It's really hard to take the advice of being give. I think that said. Oh Yeah so you know when you came on your great and talked about a lot of like remember. I remember when you came on the email about you know traveling spirit airlines and it was so I actually. That's a very good email. I wish You know I wish I had video of it so I can post it because I think relatable they like dealing with a friend who doesn't want to spend the same amount of money on something like money such a personal and like very raw subject to get into friends like like we were saying. You don't want to travel with those friends that I don't want to spend money because when you take a genuine wanna be able to splurge or that's my mentality. That's your mentality to in. That was the dilemma or this email. It was it was really a tough one. It was and you know what I in like. I see eye to eye with that email because like I remember like as my friends who started have kids like kid became really important for some of my friends when we went away together to play golf and I was like why the fuck all the sudden they need to play golf and it was like it was so interesting because like I and I started to realize I was like Oh golf is like at least I played golf like when you're younger taking trips with no kids like It was on a trip the next week. It doesn't matter like whatever we do. You know if this weird thing like I remember turtle races at one of my buddies Territory parties what they did in in Chicago. There's a bar that like you can bet on turtle races. Oh and so. We did that as one of the events when you know he got married young when you're getting married at twenty three and everyone has no wife no kids. Now we'll do the turtle race funded. Who gives a shit when someone's thirty on the Bachelor Party they're like no I'm taking? This is the one week I can. I get away from my kids. I need to do off because at least I know it to seven. Can't have something be a three can't wasted so you guys check out the Day Tearing. Pa You also have another podcast with benches which I am obsessed with them all of them but you. It's called you up. Tell me about this. I haven't listened yet. I need to listen to this one. So you up tax so yeah you know. I was doing my podcast. We're giving advice and I knew the batches and they're they have a fantastic company and I. I love working with them and they were like you want to start a new podcast where it's just date jus- modern data in a dating relationship but talking about so like. Jordana Abraham who's one of batches I every episode we dig into like modern dating issues the cross section of technology and relationships Y- pace. You can't go to your parents to get. You can't ask your parents. What does it mean when he likes and pictures of my instagram in a row? And they're GONNA you know. What does it mean when snapchat streak and what does it mean? And it's like all these questions that you know you and I and we all understand is very much a part of the times like what what we're living in so there's a lot of stress right now like you know You know I want to date but I don't WanNa be a dating APP. I I'm I'M GONNA Small Town. I love and I live in the south. Everyone's religious or they're or they're or they're crazy or they're too immature like I've got so we go through it and we take and so many of these conversations especially dating is is like an uncomfortable conversation there so we like to call it like a a place where we have uncomfortable conversations competently. I got the strength of the. Us podcast is like we talk about things that someone could. You know I think for me especially as a Guy. You could look at me and be like well. You're being a Dick. You're being this and it's like Jordan ever does that to me. She's always like open to hear a perspective. That is maybe a little icky like. Yeah Guy who liked the guy who dmz you is. It's his penis. He likes you and like the idea that and like a lot of women right now. They're like well. Does he like me or does he not light beer? It's like that's not how like exist to a guy to a guy like exists on a very wide spectrum. Me Well like I liked soccer. Do I like her enough to go on a date with you? Know twilight current. Just look at her instagram stories. Every day and never message her. Just that's enough for me me going just enough. Yeah see that actually helps me. I like to hear the guy's perspective because it would be confusing to me otherwise like exactly the behavior you're talking about would be so confusing totally that and that's kind of what the podcast there for it to have the male and female side of thing. Yeah and and also like there's no shutdown. There's never a point where you know. I look at your Dan our analysts and all that stupid. There's talking it up. Yeah I need to listen to this one. I'm assuming you guys have talked a little bit about quarantine dating and all the that's the only thing we're talking about right. I mean it's crazy. Though right I keep having friends say I mean. My some of my friends are dating more than they did in regular life right now. Yeah we'll because there's more is on the screen like yeah even if you look at like your socials are probably like you know. More people are looking at instagram. Every day more people are looking at at their phones. More people have more time like you know. Dating is seasonal. You know we only think of it. During cuffing season but all seasons have differentiation dating. Yeah and we just added a new season now and a lot of people right now are getting reached out to by people. They use today right and they're like well. Why is that guy reaching out? Well that guy can't just find someone who said Yes to their penis before on a dating right you go back to the Rolodex of people who have said Yes to his naked body before and try to hit up those space. What is there Isa go for it? My advice is no I mean. If you WANNA fuck and you WANNA hook up. Yeah but I wouldn't expect anything more right like someone's reaching back out to you. It's not because they're like they're not. I'll say this. Not a Lotta guys are saying quarantined being like I gotta get my Life Right. Visited by the ghost of fuck boy pass. You know. They're not like having a more like I. I've been wrong my whole life. I'm the girl. And and and Kerry was the one that you know saying that they're saying shit no option for their I'm alone. There's no option for random fucking. I'M GONNA GO. I'M GONNA message. Someone said if they say no my egos intact because they're only saying though because they fucked me before not because they're not attract people come back to you because it's an ego protection. I never thought about it that way. Yeah like if you if you talked up with someone and they're like hey where you been. How you how you doing you know Kelly come on. Let's go in and and then you're like you're like Oh. Hey why are you messing? They can go. Oh well we ended before at least I had I been there when yeah yeah crazy dudes man and there's so much sued. Jayme podcast you up. Podcast where else can people find you at share on Instagram? That's that's where it all have ask R. E. I. D. That's right free. Well I appreciate you being here so much. I totally appreciate your instagram. It keeps me laughing and some days right now. You really need that. That means a lot happier. You too. Good luck in New York. Good luck handles man all right. Thank you guys. We're listening. Here's something good is a new show from the Seneca Women podcast network and iheartradio each day. We aspire to bring you the good news the silver lining the glass half full because there is good happening the world everywhere everyday we just need to look for and share it. Here's something good is a short daily show that offers positive stories helpful suggestions and shared experiences to inform and inspire you every day. Listen to hear something. Good on the iheartradio APP apple podcasts. Or wherever you listen to your favorite shows subscribe now. Oh See oh look over there. Is that culture? Yes last coach Don calling. This is not Rogers and this is Bowen Yang and you might know us from shared credits including SNL show shrill nor from Queens and broad city. So yeah what those credits you can tell. These people must know what they're talking about. And here's the thing we do. If you listen to this pop culture podcast and we stayed in opinion on Pop Culture. It is henceforth law every episode. We get into the formative culture that made our guest say culture was for them. Well if that sounds interesting to you and you WANNA keep it in. The iheartradio family listened to Las Culturas. Doesn't mean I heart radio APP apple podcasts. Or wherever you get your podcasts.

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060420 Part 1

Ace and TJ

52:15 min | 6 months ago

060420 Part 1

"DIRTY TIMBERS DOT COM is wood products cut fresh daily. Their products include custom boards cut for announcements holidays, kids sports in anything you can design with wood products cut fresh daily there at dirty timbers dot com. DIRTY TIMBERS DOT com. You'll love clothing from our friends. At two tulips dot com collections include dresses, accessories, Mommy, and me and more get ten percent off right now at two tulips dot com again. That's two tulips dot com. Family I would never have even imagined when I was a kid. What do you mean it's a boat with a slide on it? Get outta here. The only thing I've ever seen like that was we went to visit my aunt who lived in Rainbow City? There was some kind of this game. No. There was a there was like a big. We would go to I. Think it was in Gadston. I'm not sure because I was little, but they had a big slide out in the middle of the of the lake, you'd swim to it instead on this platform and slide in the lake, and that was just awesome, except for the fact, that slide was aluminum. It burn the crap out of you. Out of this. Aluminum or somebody's tin roof turned into a slot. But I think these boats are the cool. As, an I'm a grown man, you I would be going off that slide all I would do all day long. It would be the coolest thing ever, but if you were a kid at nine ten. My Dad had a boat that could climb up on the top of it and take a slide down into the lake. That would have been amazing. We We're renting one of those for our. Annual trip to crab island when we go to Destin on vacation this year. We're going to get do one with the slide because. It's mainly for my wife, because nothing turns her on like seeing her fat husband, go down a slide. Into Beautiful Emerald Water. But. We were. In talking about these. So excited about it, but there they are there. Are you see these boats and they have their kids? This is like that's the coolest thing good for you. That's awesome. They look like little wusses with those life jackets on Oh. Come on kids. Out of the bubble. I know it's a law now? I don't think it would matter if out of an auto boated told me that I want to take the life jacket on the side. Yeah, here, you take it off, man. Look ridiculous. When you take it off the side, you'll be fine. Put it back on. The water in front of you. And then when you hit the water, just grab it back. With, my dad would. Try to try to slide your legs to come off the slide. But. It. was funny like. If my dad had a boat with the slot I would have freaked it. Please if your. Dad had a sofa you would have. Fast. Connected, funding. Is the TJ show? What we're. About to say, we're my class. If I'm old man, reading glasses into. They were hooked onto my shirt. That's how you know you need Oh. Man Reading glasses when you can't even remember it. You got on your person. You'll start the show with one pair of glasses, and then halfway through the show you look over, and he's wearing a different pair of glasses. Why is that? I? Don't know well. I have a nice pair of reading glasses. They real nice and. As my sister-in-law Louisiana's. Forum. Well, he's on a nice watch. Anybody's going to be a four. NASCAR one time. If you could get my brother watch for his birthday. Well, he He's GonNa. Watch and he made a good bit for. There's no way you're GONNA be able to top that because he made a good bit for any way I paid a good bit for those glasses, and then i. Forget that I haven't because I only wear them. You know when we're GONNA BE ON TV or when we have that studio audience come in for those things that we probably will never be able to again because. Of people dropping like flies over that that China cove it. But Anyway These are just so I got either wild grace. While they were open. While walgreens was open. And then. Go in there after they closed. That's him. Break a window. Go in and get them. Yeah, but they tearing up see it's a little rubber piece right? Here's keeps coming up. Probably six bucks. These pick a bit for. Now the. They were thirty. But I mean there is. Very critical of myself you know in the way I look now. I used to be really good looking and. Lost all of that and it hurts more on someone who knows what it's like to be good looking more so than someone who's always been ugly. Look at yourself when you're an adult go. Oh God. I don't look good anymore. But. Glasses. you. Know One thing I. Do I can recognize still that is a positive thing about my looks is at all sunglasses. Look Great on me. It doesn't matter what kind they are. Women's means low baby sunglasses. Just something all sunglasses. Look good on me. They'll say here. Try these on, and said give me tests. They somebody walk in with some single. Hey, let me see. My friend Jimmy did it to me the other day. He'd try these on. And they were women sunglasses at one of her friends had just bought I put them on, she attained. They. Do look good on you. They trying to find a pair that doesn't look good him, and you know what? I don't know why they don't just give it up. Give it up, always gonNA look good. Yeah, they always say. Do you have an oval shape face or a heart shaped face? I have no idea if I see somebody with a heart shape fade like it looks like a heart like what isn't that Reese Witherspoon doesn't she have heart shaped faces and in an elongated chin. Shape face. I am not one of those people who who could ever say. All Sunglasses look good be. Really Oh. No, no I could not say also because all sunglasses don't going to be some of them look horrid. I don't know what kind sunglasses you were. The, ones our kind of aviator ish giant ones. You have a pair of big giant. Sunglasses. Those are Maui. Jims the have a pair of everybody hates them. I like them so I keep wearing them every now and then while we're aware wearing on the lake, because my good ones. I don't want work with him. Afraid there and when you drive the boat, the the areas of their flimsier. More stable on the Lake Amanda pointed out I. Hate Those sunglasses there look like goggles. Okay, but the cut out all the all the light and they're all you said good ones. How do you know they're good ones? Whatever you're? Talking about the good ones they're. They're expensive and they're good so in other words. What. I paid for. TJ Show. Second. We've got an usual musical collaboration coming up yesterday. It was young thug and Thomas Rhett. One of the people that you've musical collaboration isn't even a singer or musical performer at all. So that's coming up and go back Thursday were thought back to two thousand twelve. Malaysian Oregon witness, some type of accident and a reporter showed up to. Interview her about the incident. And she revealed some pretty scandalous information. It's a classic. Definitely brighten your day next malicious audio. This is the. Live on the security collection handpicked by Jordan fish believes that you should only own and where pieces that you absolutely love quality pieces. You will want to wear every single day. Go to live on the nine's dot com. That's live on the nine dot. COM unleashed dog training. Dot Net is a service to help train puppies, obedience programs. Canine good citizen protection. Dog More they offer transportation for those interested unleashed dog training dot net. Into J. Show presents. Delicious audio. Kind! There's a clip going viral of someone. Someone crashed into a light pole. It's in their neighbors yard. Side of the house kind of thing. In the neighbor is really really nice. Oh. IDEA. Arabic Fella A. Okay. I like to the. Idea Jeez always look at that. Knock that thing. Clean off to did a good job on that one. Are you hungry? Come on in, have some Baloney Salad. Just made it. Of so today's throwback Thursday audio. We go back to twenty twelve. An Oregon woman witnessed some type of an accident when the reporter from news channel eight in Portland tried to interview her about the incident. She revealed some rather scandalous information. Well, the police wouldn't let me go to through hundred hundred twenty seconds, so I had to go around one hundred and one thousand, nine hundred. And And I was they let me look at the the lawyers building. No, the vacuum cleaner man he seen. The. Yes. Yes, yes, he must have been greatly or. He must have been badly were injured. I haven't been allowed to drive for three years so I am not a good judge of that. Not. Make sense and the reporter just rolls right like Even say that I'm just GONNA. Keep going. Which is the best thing to do in that case? Just pretend like it didn't happen. was that live though. That alive deal? I don't think been on Because I would have if not live, we could've kept rolling. That would have gotten a lot lot more from her. For the for the Christmas party. The Christmas party everybody sure. Dino why and how and what is the vacuum cleaner man like a vacuum cleaner salesman are the gene vacuum later? Man is in. He is guy. That cleans inside the building Oh. Maybe Oh. Yeah, probably. He's which did know if he's never been to her house or anything. How has he? Does she go by that building and flash him? I thought the vacuum cleaner may admit that he sales vacuums and that's why he had been with her. In her presence for her to be able to show him on. Top. Either way a couple of different options. For the second row, though an unusual collaboration yesterday, it was young thug and Thomas Rhett. which I think we all seem to like shockingly today. Tiffany haddish. And one of Reagans all time favorites Jason Morass Jason Mraz. You told us mom that you made him a star or something. Yeah, yeah, very uncomfortable. What fourteen twelve and eleven. so this is called you, do you? Think. Thing with. Harbor. Together we make the world will. Be Used. How did he come upon Tiffany haddish being the choice. For that I wonder I. Don't know she's not a musician. I'm not. I like her funny, but. I wonder how that you think friends somehow and he said you know we should do. Should make a song may be. Was She rapid? Yeah. I like the the one yesterday better. I liked it a lot better. That's terrible. That's Jason Whereas Tiffany Haddish. It's called you to you. Is the TJ Shell Shell. If you've always dreamed of having a swimming pool in your backyard. For us. We have. A story for you about how you can do just that. And it will cost you hipster money. which is no money hardly at all. The hipsters figured out a way for everybody to live the dream of having a pool in their backyard. The details. There's more of the TJ show. It Hustle bbq dot com is hustling the competition with an online store you'll love featuring rubs and sauces. T shirts hats, barbecue tools had a barbecue videos all that and more love it all at Pitt. Hustle BBQ DOT COM, all as and TJ show graphics and web designer done by Alpha lab designs, looking for spectacular email design at ace. TJ Dot Com web design menus, marketing materials, brochures, flyers, social media, ads and more design at a TJ DOT com. Want to hear the best thirty minutes of today's TJ show listen to ace and TJ and thirty podcasts available on the Act TJ show podcast on our APP available afternoon eastern stay connected funny on the ace and TJ APP available in itunes and Google play. You know they are still carrying on with this this Corona Virus Chirad. You know they're trying to keep it going. Even though you know they're. All the other stuff is going on with the. With the protests in Oh. You know the. The people who have put so much time into. Bringing people down locking people up because of the because of the virus are still fighting. Well a lot of public pools. Are are still closed and they're not going to be opening anytime soon, so the The fix for that with a lot of people has become. the cattle trough pool, so they don't they don't. They're not buying more above ground pools to go in their backyard. These are those giant round metal cattle troughs. You would put just out in the pasture, whatnot and They're building little decks around them and all of this stuff, so it's It's got that that hipster design that looks Rusty rustic farmhouse, thank. The the hipster design of some people are building decks around them and all, but I don't know how the filtration and all that would work. I guess you just. I don't know I. Don't know if you couldn't chlorine in it or are Wyoming. Pump, so it's not what I really what I what I pictured originally. It's the big round silver. One thing that's okay. That's not kind of how I had envisioned the trough. I didn't understand Okay, and one's got one of those. We're looking at here in Little Rock. Has One of those giant inflatable swans in it. Oh, we had, we were one of the first people to get those get that big thing and and we named Jack What's his name? Zach F Swan. I gotta be honest. I thought this was dumb until I looked. It's Kinda cool. They've got one that I'm looking at here that they've built a an entire. Privacy thing around and run not just water to the trough, but water, and made it an outdoor shower as well, and it's got its own privacy fence around it with. The the the big shade like you by the lows that critics up and down that's over the top, and so at night it's got lighting built into the wall. That's around the privacy fence that surrounded to offer some subdued lighting. It's got some PLA-. Some of these are really also yeah, above ground. Pool be better. Too because it's made to be a swimming pool, these are made to just water. You can't really swim in these. These are just for lounging and hanging out in. Yeah, but still I mean how do you? How do you treat the water? They have chlorine systems in them and pumps and things like that. I don't know, but you don't treat water in a creek you'll be. True so country boy. Kirk yeah, there must be a way to do, but neither these are cool, but some of these look pretty awesome. The way they've got them set up I. mean some of them don't. Let's be honest, but some of these are pretty cool the way they fix them all. They say they're from You get the the trough of firm around three hundred to six hundred dollars, and then by the time you put all the other stuff whether you're looking at I think. Several grand and the project, but with the YOU'RE GONNA put decking and all that stuff. But. It wouldn't matter to me how small the thing is because if it'll hold a raft. That's all I need. Yeah and. It looks like it would, but it wouldn't hold tight holding two rafts. But. It does show that they're putting. POPs in them instead okay. But. I don't know how that were. They gotta have a skimmer and they'll sure yeah, so it's not. It's not a swimming pool so to speak. It's more like just something you can lounge in because there's really no swimming is not big enough for that. It's like a kids pool. In some of these look you know like they've done too much. Yeah, you know less is more I think. Too much stuff strewn about. Just need to be decorated better. But at that point, you spend that much money. Why don't you just get the above ground pool yeah? I. Don't know if that cost well. These are hipsters. Remember and they think an above ground pool is unsightly. These go with more of a farm of Rustic House Elise no the same type of people that would have urban chickens. Right exactly. You've got pencil thin mustache in your drinking, Kombucha in engineer's Cap. It's like your unsightly. Britney that Ted deemed as and said they have pods at Walmart. Clean the water that used. I guess you regularly dropped the pods in. Whatever waters in there, but what do they have to clean the Walmart? GOTCHA! If, you are an almond milk lover, drink almond milk, use milk, but I'm not a lover of. Enough I wasn't trying to be on fat. I will be drinking at all. but there is a nightmare story. About the almond meal. To break to nick. If, you're a pet owner. We want you to know about a product called the door buddy, and what the door buddy does. The beauty of it is. It's big enough for your cat to fit through, but not big enough for your dog. See all the ways you can use the door buddy at the door. Buddy dot com somewhere out there. There's a man on a park bench eating his five. Five hundredth PB and J. He has no idea papa. John's has new padeas that are way better than a boring sandwich with Papa John's meats, cheeses and veggies hand folded into crispy flat bread crust. Someone tell that man get a new Papa Dee and one four flavors for just six bucks better ingredients better pizza better than a Sandwich Papa John's now with this country's in Texas. Extra prices may vary. TJ Show. All right. I got busted yesterday. On. The Bust and It's a funny story at my expense. So we'll be glad to throw that out there for you. Youtube Point and laugh TJ so stupid high. He's in child So. Get Ready. A thirty four year old guy who's called Billy Smith. From. Doubt and Massachusetts. Sorry Stauton Massachusetts. Not Massachusetts. Think is kind of sounded like I said that he went to a grocery store last week in someone saw him taking containers of almond milk off the shelves opening opening them. And relieving himself in them Oh then he put them back in the on the shelves and he took off. A security guard got his license plate and the cops arrested him the next day on charges of attempted poisoning, disorderly conduct and vandalizing property Obviously the person who wrote this story is one of the worst reporters ever because this is, there's no word on why he decided to relieve himself in the almond milk. Well, that's the story the whole story. That's the first thing I wanted to know when you started talking about this. Y and why? Almond Milk Yeah Yeah! He has almond milk That's interesting. It doesn't say whether it was unsweetened or vanilla or Chocolate they make chocolates discussing, but they make. Any drank it for. He drank almond milk. I know it just says He. He opened them up and then. and. It doesn't say how many 'CAUSE I. Mean that's that's difficult in and of itself. If you're going to do it to more than one, you would have to open them at the same time, so you could switch off right you couldn't you couldn't. Open one and then do it, and then say okay now. Let me get another one and open it then then finish yeah. Because, I mean once it starts you gotTA. Pop. You can't stop. You got to be open and ready to go burns. And? There's not a lot of room when you open up a thing of milk or something, so you'd have to drink a little out of to get some. Some room allow. Do, they have they have seals on those things. They do the one that I by it's. In A. Cardboard Carton has the little plastic thing on the top of the you open then you gotta. PULL TAB out of that. So he had to do what I'm saying, he couldn't have done that. Unless he opened more than one at a time. You know right from the beginning he an. Who doesn't see him? Open the first one and go over there and say what's what's going on here. But how many of these stories do you hear about things like this that happening grocery stores, and that's the first question everybody has. What, how did this keep going on? Right, so he standing there, clearly, he's there in the in the the milk area in plain sight just. UNSCREWING them all taking the time bomb. It putting it back. Yeah, because. Everybody is always you know they're always watching me in the grocery store. Everybody because I'm usually the only one in. They're not wearing a mask and I forget that you can only go one way and I gotta go all the way into this aisle and then come back up this one when what I needs right there. I get a lot of looks in the grocery store I'm like. Here's you and your scare mask. OUTTA here. Oh take one of these over to the bakery and what they want to do with it. Like. He was ordered to stay away from supermarkets until his next court date. August. Coming up. Trending with Brigands NBA, fans are celebrating NFL. Fans are trying to cancel one of the most popular stars in the sport details, the now training in less than ten minutes. Part of the show now by calling one eight, four, one to twenty, three, eighty, five, four as at Tj. Crustacean designs is a new designer who specializes in announcements, home, clothing, mask, and more with a specialization in all things floral. You'll love the designs you can find at Crustacean designs DOT COM. That's that CRUSTACEAN DESIGNS DOT COM is your small to mid sized business ready for the inevitable rebound voice hunter dot com specializes in providing top level voice talent for all your video. Video Marketing e-learning and advertising needs. There's no better time than right now to focus on increasing your customer base and corporate internal audio needs boy center dot com is a voiceover service with the world's best voice, actors and Actresses Call Center Dot Com at seven, zero, four, six, four, eight, nine, thousand, eight, hundred, or visit us on the web at Boy Center DOT COM. The top of the hour we give you the hottest trending topics in the world. This is doubt training with Reagan's on the TJ show. So today around twelve thirty eastern the NBA's board of governors are set to vote on the return of the NBA season with twenty two teams now. Is that the full? No league known not every team you've got gotTA. Be Within their inviting twenty two teams because. Sixteen teams make the playoffs right. They're inviting these other six teams because they are within I, think within six games of making the playoffs. Okay, so they're gonNA play. The proposal has them playing eight games. As as the end of the regular season, which would give those teams a chance to fall in or fall out of the playoffs. That'd kind of deals. If you're close, you're GONNA have a shot for example. The Charlotte Hornets not invited to A. Team gets invited my favorite team. Who's your favorite team teacher? Harlem globetrotters Oh well. I feel they're going to do well. They always win great track record. And they're. They're playing in Orlando. So, is it going to be at Disneyworld? It will be a variety of places, in Orlando, but Disneyworld is. Going to be centered. Yes, yes, so they're coming back, re. Starting the season as the way they're raising, the vote goes through an appears that it will. Why Orlando I because they can somewhat sequester them away at Disneyworld Yeah, because ABC is owned by Disney ABC has the is the big ABC ESPN. The big NBA broadcasting rights belong to them in America yeah. Or could be that Florida has a fantastic wonderful governor. WHO believes in freedom to more open state true, that's. A very big part of it yeah, his name is Rhonda Santa's. And he's He he's fantastic awesome. So they're GONNA they're. GonNa Radical Roy, are are they going to? How's everybody in that that you're right? That is I forgotten. What play a part into it and they're gonNA. How's everybody at Disney world? There's worst places to stay. You know the happy. Little. Wall Sticky Oh decade, Disney stuff but in I don't normally do this, but in other sports news breeze drew brees from the New Orleans. Saints is the top trending topic this morning. It's drew. BREES is canceled and it's because he did an interview with Yahoo Sports, and he said they were. He was asked about how the NFL's GonNa react with kneeling. Kneeling and things like that given the protests around the country, and he said I'll never agree with anybody disrespecting the flag of the United States of America or our country, and then he talked about whenever he hears. The Anthony thinks about his grandfather's fighting in the war and stuff like that, and then other celebrities reacted and the whole. Internet reacted to drew brees his comments. What he said was so controversial and and so hateful, and well he had posted one of the black boxes on instagram or on social media the day before so people were pointing out like he doesn't really support. The movement. Because because he supports his the the spirit of America and the freedom and the flag, and that sort of thing, he's patriotic, so that's why. Is that what they're saying ace that he's patriotic, so he can't. He can't be a nice purse. They're saying he's racist. Okay Yeah. Him Racist because he does it because, and that's the only thing I and he put up posted another video last night on Youtube. Trying to further explain that I have no problem with any I fully support it. This is the thing essentially what he's saying is. I was asked a question and my answer is i. see it as being disrespectful to the flag. He doesn't say no one should be allowed to do it. He said he was asked a question about his response to it and he gave it. He sees it as disrespectful to the flag. End of story. It's that one thing and now they're calling. People are calling him A. Racist. At teammates said that they were hurt and that his comments were extremely self-centered. Among other things, they said a lot. More things that are that are teammates, his some of his teammates, and then a lot of other NFL and NBA. Players have spoken out against him, and he made the point in his youtube video last night. You know I just don't agree with anybody kneeling when the when the American flag is flown in the national anthem is playing I. Don't agree with it. I'm it. You Know He. He's not arrested. I think he should be arrested. Thrown in football jail. Survey. They have a football jail with the eagles. Football one of his teammates Malcolm Jenkins. said in a veto instagram people who share your sentiments who express those and this quote, people who share your sentiments expressed those and push them throughout the world. The airwaves are the problem in quote. And I think after that was rubies went back on the on his youtube later and said. Hey, you asked me about this thing I disagree with kneeling for the flag. I think it's disrespectful, but but everything else fully support. Does he have kids? Yeah, they probably had to help them. Yeah, upload that video to Youtube. He doesn't know how to do that. No Way, so many things are now during. An opportunity for you to laugh at at my shortcomings or at least one of my major shortcomings. and this is something that I've never admitted before, but it will beat a no surprise to anyone. that. This is a shortcoming for me and I was busted yesterday. For my short. Enough. This is the EYSENCK. When you look at your current bathroom, do you know that it needs an immediate update? We want you to know about one day bath and shower remodeling with prices as low as one hundred ninety nine dollars per month, call, eight, hundred, nine, four, eight, five, seven, four, nine, eight, hundred, four, eight, five, seven, four, nine. Okay, now that we're all both stuck at home and looking at any new hobby or career ideas remember we've got our podcast company and can help you with a career. Career in podcast. All you need is the idea, and we can help you with everything else from posted on I tunes how you do a podcast and most importantly how you do it podcast and have it sound professional now this part may be good for some and well not so much for others, but as and I will listen and help you with your podcast, and this is an optional service. All you need to do is radio network DOT com. That's radio network, DOT, com. My name is Tj. And most people don't know this unless you know really really well, but I have a couple of shortcomings. One of them is Back in the days when I used a a a mouse for my computer. I was not good at double clicking. Just couldn't get it the double click. I. Know Who's was like after the first one, my index finger will just go paralyze for a second to. Couldn't get the other one down. They'd get it down again fast enough. I don't have a problem with it. On the little mouse track things a little PAT But on an external mouse the. Double Click. Maybe half the time. It worked the first time. You should keep that to yourself. I mean I've already thrown it out. There I like letting people. I'm human just like everybody else. I have things that I can't do properly. I'm not good with power tools. That's another one. But Yesterday I just came to the conclusion. that. There's something that I just cannot do. And that is. Pay attention during a conference call. I can't do it. It's very difficult and You know I don't have a good attention span to begin with I'm kind of all over the place always have been. Musical add is something a- term. We invented on this show. No matter how often you hear it around the country whatever it started on this show, because I admitted one day that I have this condition, if somebody uses in a conversation, a word that I pick out from a song I start singing the song in my head and don't pay attention to what they're saying after that. The example of that when I came to that conclusion was I was watching the news, and they said something about waiting for the floodwaters to subside. And I see you. Don't hear that word very often. Are They and oh well. That's in that old Dan Hill Song sometimes when we touch till the fee, Romy subsizes, and by the time I get through all of that then the stories over and I missed all of it. Yesterday. We had a green kids board meeting. And Grin kids is our charity for kids who are terminally ill and chronically disabled. Going along who wasn't even a long conference call board meeting. It was pretty short the in person they're. They're in our. Yes, thirty minutes. This was was barely even thirty minutes. But as toward the end when we first started, somebody's phone was going Oh. And you couldn't hear it so one of the board members. I don't know all their names. They're a bunch of. It was one of the guys. Named Jamie or something starts with J. Jas. Jason does correct. Yeah. he wears a tie every day one of those. And he goes deserve. I have their foam muted. So I, thought okay well. We're supposed to be muting our phones during this. You're not talking so I, did. And I'm listening and. I'm trying to pay attention. Everybody's volume is different on the phone and finally just kinda started staring off into space. And we get to the part where. I, mean ace even said something about some that I had an idea that I had about this or that and I didn't even say anything during that. Because he'd cover them, lay on. There's no name for me to say anything. Slow things down, you know. Ten or eleven people were was too many to having come. All the way to do it now, we had to have the board meeting Blah Blah Blah while I better that way than being in person. But It got to the part where okay well there? Any other questions news going to be short and sweet today. Anybody got any more questions and I'm dismayed moving noon and I hear One of the other guys start talking, but I can't hear him that will, and then he's. He's talking for a second, and then all of a sudden. There's this big big lock a long pause. And our director Lee, Anna. TJ. What he asked A. Question to me. About something that I'm supposed to be following up on from a long time ago. I didn't hear any question. It was at least fifteen twenty seconds. Longtime long enough to where I assumed TJ had forgotton to. His Mike and he was answering didn't realize it was answer I should have gone with that. Because my first moment, my first thought was. He just hung up and got off this line, but then I remembered. It would've clicked him out. you hear, somebody hangs up then I thought. I bet he's dog. I started like I. Bet he's talking and his phone's on Mute I realized that he goes. Well I I have hard time here. was that. Was that question to me Oh? I couldn't hear what he was I didn't know. So well. Good. Okay we. Can. Keep you repeat the question. When he asked the question I was like I. Immediately! I'm having a hard time twenty five minutes. If you have hard time, here's that to me I'm having a hard time hearing I couldn't hear that to me. Me I ever asked me anything. The only thing I say in in those meetings is if I'm trying to crack a joke on somebody or something. Yeah I'm. I'm rarely asked to participate. Which I think is good for everybody. Yeah, probably. But it's so now. It's funny, though because I write what I thought I. Bet he's talking to his Mike. Commute Nudie said was having a hard time here. You weren't you weren't. Now? I can't stand that guy. That ask the question that made me look bad yeah! Because he no, he's been on the board for many years. He knows not to ask me. What question could he be asking like? Really know what what does he want? What do you want? I think he just wanted to address me. Probably because I'm famous, it's exciting So Are you like I? AM where you've had to recently just realized look I just cannot do blank. and. I'm given a- simple things. I, can't I can't build a house, but right. I just cannot. Use a flat iron and get all of my hair straight so. I'm finished. Not flat ironing anymore yeah. I just got to the point where I cannot. Bake. A try and it's always wrong. It. Everything comes out dry. I can't maybe you've just realized I cannot parallel park so after park. You know four blocks from work every day because my spot is a parallel spun out in front of the bill to you I just can't do it by. So. Who's got something? Are, you can just leave. Leave me out here with my sister flapping in the breeze. One triple, eight, forty, one as TJ or Social Media More Act's. I'm Bobby Barbara Independent since he director. Do you love Spa Software and Susan Beautiful? Home Decor then hurry over to my website. SMELLS JUST DOT COM, and look at our New Himalayan salt warmers they're available in your color, choice or white, or hey, go ahead and get both right. Our new fragrance bars inhale exhale are perfect with these warmers, featuring hints of salted citrus, calming Frisia and Solar Woods. These items are on sale, but only while supplies last so hurry and go to smells just dot com and get yours today. Hey, it's going and I WANNA make sure you know about the Hampton Inn and suites, South Park and the completely renovated. Fitness and breakfast areas just call seven, four, three, one, nine, fifty, seven, hundred to book your reservation or newly designed conference room. That's seven, zero, four, three, one, nine, fifty, seven hundred. The TJ show would like to thank everyone who has helped with ace. TJ's grandkids charity our once a year trip to Disneyworld with chronically disabled and terminally ill children and their families please visit grandkids dot org for sponsorship opportunities and again thank you. Okay, I have come to Tj. I have become I. have come to the realization that. I cannot no matter how much I try. I cannot focus on a conference call. I I'll I'll make this caveat if there are more than two other people. If they're three including me, I'm good. But any more than that I just can't stay focused on. So what can you not do? This lady says My Name's Laura and I can't use my new hair wand. My hair looks awful. Exactly what I'm talking. What is that? You know what that is. You're close to being a girl. Yes so it's like a curling iron without the clamp on it, so it's just literally a hot Rod. Who He huck Rod for you here. This lady said I've just realized I can't deal with stupid people, okay. Now. Ladies Listen To what this guy is saying and see how you would take this if he were your husband or boyfriend. He wanted to rank remain anonymous, he says I've realized that just can't listen to my wife's stories when I'm watching something on TV. I. Pause the show for her to talk to me, but I. Still can't focus on what she say in because I'm so anxious to get back to watch your my show. A needed to start telling her to wait until my show is over in, I'll give her my own divided attention. That wouldn't that bad. Make her mad tune. That wouldn't. That wouldn't go over well and keep making your way through it, brother. But they know they can tell when you're not paying attention. Are you even listening to me. And the truth is not a good answer. There I'm trying, but you're a terrible storyteller. Sounds like he's just so focused on wrapped up in his show. She could be a wonderful storyteller, but it's just not his show, and that's all he's able to concentrate on. But if a wife told her husband that same thing I look, let me finish watching housewives. Or whatever the Andy Cohen thing is the new at what happens after the show or whatnot. Then I'll give you my undivided attention. He'd be like all right. We'll be do. There's a guy here that says. I realized I can't play a musical instrument. Every guy I grew up with plays guitar about two guitars and a Ukulele I've given them all away. I gave Hewlett both guitars, I up, giving away, the ukulele hangs on the wall. Can't I mean that's a chick magnet? UKULELE. One lady came out how to use the instant pot. The Pot is not really. By started talking about it in the beginning like it was such a great shortcut, and just pitted it. Put It in there and dinner's done and. You still got to cook with that thing. It takes them cooking to get it right. Okay, look. ever since I saw the update on this story. I've been really excited to bring it. A dirty. Rotten filthy criminal has been brought to justice. And all my crime. DACA LADIES ARE GONNA love the way he was brought down. Something right off of investigation discovery. The, not it didn't come from investigators, but it probably will be on there some point. Give you the details next case T. Want to save up to seventy five percent on domestic or international airline tickets then call low cost airlines for prices so low. We can't publish them. Call Eight, hundred, two, eight, seven, forty, seven, sixteen, eight, hundred, two, eight, seven, forty, seven, sixteen. Coming on the TJ show. Your Mama in full words. About four letter words about your Momma but your Mama in four words. and not at their things like we kind caring loving not. Be Real about your Mama. In four words in about thirty minutes of the as TJ show, this could become a viral well, probably not because they're more important things in the world today, but still. Okay we're. GonNa call this cove. It cracks the case. In February twenty eighteen king city. California. A juvenile girl reported being sexually assaulted. Please police didn't have any identity of suspect or anything. So they turned it over to the major crimes unit. They call that MC you. In the police department major crimes. Unit and they've been investigating at this whole time. And then they got information as to a suspect led them to a suspect being called Leonardo Ramirez. And they called Leonardo Ramirez in to quote unquote discuss an unrelated matter. So. They had a plan what they were gonNA. Do Go. Now remember this started in twenty eighteen. Leonardo Ramirez came in and the police told him. Would you mind putting on this mask? Because that's the health department's order that we're GONNA be speaking close closely and we need to be wearing masks. and. This is the type of mask that's required. So he got the mask from the from the police and he. Threw away a mask he had been wearing. They interview him. Thank you for stopping by hold on. We'll We'll get someone to show you out and you know. Blah Blah Blah. They took the mass that he threw away. DNA tested. It matched boom. The guy's arrest. By questioned the whole time. Could they have taken mask? They gave to him well I guess it doesn't once. He throws it away. Trash discarded it. They can grab the one for DNA right. Okay, yeah, I didn't know both of them would count not so they had his DNA from the assault. Yeah, but they had no match to. And then they did the whole mask trick thing. Like he came in. That was two years ago came in not thinking he's a suspect. Who is you know you have some questions? Ask You about an whatever the issue was. DNA Dina. He's in jail made the magic goes to jail for sexual assault. Awesome. So Kovic cracks the case, something good attock. Ovid. Hysteria yeah. Getting criminals off the street. Getting they're dying off the masks. Yeah. I didn't mean something good. I mean somebody was sexually assaulted, but yeah. Yeah. Yeah, just didn't want any. Right. Out there point you can't be too careful. These people freaking out learn. And he's probably thinking. Yeah, how throw this mask? I've been wearing away because this has to be a much better one 'cause you know. The police have to have good ones. Is better than the one at or this one away. Keep this woman Leigh. Could they not bring him in and just do a DNA sample? Why would they not have to have a warrant who you really are either? They have to agree They have to agree to the DNA swab. Thing or you have to have a warrant. I'm pretty sure yeah. That's crazy. Yeah great please. Coming up on now trending with Briggs. I don't think the ladies are going to like today's holiday, not at all, not at not even one little bit, but I have to share it with you less than ten minutes and now Terendak. TJ Show by texting at Jay and your message. Six, eight, nine, three more hastened TJ.

ace TA NBA Jason Mraz Tiffany haddish NFL Tj reporter Disneyworld Massachusetts Oregon J. He Leonardo Ramirez Orlando Rainbow City America NASCAR
Grape Therapy: Hannah Ann

Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

54:30 min | 8 months ago

Grape Therapy: Hannah Ann

"Thank you for listening to this. Podcast one option available on spotify apple. Podcasts podcast one dot com in anywhere else. You podcasts. This week scrape therapy is sponsored by GEICO GO TO GEICO DOT COM and fifteen minutes. You could be saving fifteen percent or more on car insurance extra money in your pocket. It just may be the most rewarding to do you do today persona feel the difference with persona razors today right now. My listeners can get twenty five percent off their first order at. Www DOT AMAZON DOT com slash persona today and use my code vine. Show Fab that fun. That fun is happiness delivered straight to your door. Each season choose from a variety of beauty fashion fitness and wellness products to customize your very own springboks. It retails for forty nine ninety nine but always has value over two hundred dollars use coupon code vine for ten dollars off your first box at fund dot com ritual vitamins. Better health doesn't happen overnight and right now. Ritual is offering my listeners. Ten percent off during your first three months. Fill in the gaps in your diet with essential for women a small step that helps support a healthy foundation for your body. Listen to your heart. The bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. A six episode event premieres Monday April Thirteenth at eight. Pm Eastern Time Slash Pacific Time on ABC and Look Royal Enjoy Lacroix's sparkly modern a healthier alternative for you and your lifestyle. The Christ Barkley Mater is available nationwide so for a full list of retailers visit Lacroix Water Dot Com and for more information joined the Likud community on social at Lacroix water. A right you love the bachelor I know you do the Bachelorette and of course bachelor in Paradise and on Monday April thirteenth. The next bachelor chapter begins the premiere of the Bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. This new show has everything. You love about the bachelor romance hot tubs Chris Harrison and of course the drama drama and more drama but with musical strings attached twenty single musicians. We'll step inside the bachelor mansion to embark on an incredible to find love through the power of music. The harmony of the couples will be tested by their relationships and judged by some of the biggest names in music like Jason Mraz Kesse and Bachelor Nation Fan favorites. You will see Jason Myself on their. Which are these new bachelor. Hopefuls will make beautiful music together who will strike the right note. And who is there for the song reasons the bachelor presents? Listen to your heart. Six episode event starting Monday April Thirteenth. Eight seven central on. Abc podcast. One percents off the vine grave. Therapy Kaitlyn Bristowe. Answer your questions drink to your concessions and you have to say about anything bachelor. Let's shake it up some more years. Caitlyn I'm your host Kaitlyn Bristowe. My guest today. Is someone who you I got to know. On the most recent season of the bachelor she started off the season with a little drama. But it wasn't your fault champagne gate. That was so dumb but definitely one over America. After standing up for herself post break-up knowing her worth though she may not be the next Bachelorette I have a feeling. We will definitely see her again. Either on Paradise if that's going to happen or you can just follow her on instagram and talk and all those fun things that we're doing these days while we're bored so please. Welcome to the PODCAST. Hannah and how are you? I thank you so much for having me. I'm doing well at noon. Well I mean this time. Is You know scary. And full of uncertainty you. But I'm doing really well. Good where are you right now? Are you in? La Yes so. I moved right after a Har- so I was slow now. I said I'm packing two suitcases right after the show tonight apartment minutes. Oh Wow good for you. I like a little risk taker. Is that usually how you are in life? Are you a risk taker? Or is this like a big move for you know? I'm a taker. Oh you are yeah so like I mean thinking about it. The poss like ten days has been like such like. I should show in a sense because like I moved out to you know I finished airfare. Finish the season move into my apartment. I had never seen before in person I found out I was getting a roommate earlier than expected and I had never met my roommate before. And then find out now that. I'm being quarantined with my new roommate being clergy allnight like Monty Jones Kitchen. So I'm quarantined into my power. Goes out for three days. All my meals get spoiled. So it's just you know it's been a little rough but I'm surviving Jiang. That's that right. There just gave me anxiety. I can't handle the thought of living with somebody that I don't know like. That's very brave of you and then to be quarantined. Do you get along. Yes it's actually has been seamless. It's been perfect but like I'm taking a step back. What the crap like the past two weeks three weeks of my life and it's just been crazy wait. I'm so thrown off by this that you'd never met her. So this is a girl is a girl. Yeah yeah we talked into bone but like we never met a person like you know a lot about her but she honestly awesome. That's that is a high risk high reward. Move right there because what if she suck and then look? How did you find her? What if she was like a fan girl and like was super creepy about it so she was my friend's sister but I had never met her sister before my friend she? She seemed like really nice. My shoes really like my best friend's friend on so I'm I'm a people person. I like to be friends with people you know. I'm very social and so I I thought you know she was really nice and then she was like Kamal. My sister's looking for a roommate. I'm like well maybe maybe may. I'll have a move in so that was like the plants get here and then I get a phone call from my friend. She's like my sister likes to move in now. If off on a Mike while shore I said it in the moment I say shore and everything was started happening like oh. Wow literally my friend. Drop me off apartment. I had never seen before like say God. It's like nice good landlord. But I'm like what like what a freak wrist acre. That's great that's great because I think that's what gets people you know. I think that's what brings success. And that's what's going to get you to where the places that you're supposed to go by taking risks and like not looking back. It'd just be like I'm going to do this. And I don't care I was when I was nineteen. I moved with hockey bag of clothes so Canadian of me. I had hockey bag of clothes and just like moved to a one bedroom apartment with four people shared a room with a guy a bedroom with a guy who I ended up dating and like just went for like all these random things but now I'm like looking back every crazy. Step like that you take is going to lead to like five five or ten years from now or you're going to look back and be like thank God. I did that because that opened so many doors for me. Yeah I mean I love that you know. I try to be as independent as possible and like I've lived in La for like certain instances of time but never had my own place voice unlike a sub lease but like walking into like an NBA apartment. And I'm like wow like this isn't really exactly where I thought life would be. But it's where it's at and like as just keep it moving forward. You know so really. Moving out here was a was a great first to like a new beginning absolutely. That's kind of NEAT. That after the show. How did you end up going on the show? Because I know you're friends with Hannett so many hands Hannah G so was she like. Oh you should go. Or how did you decide to go? You've probably told the story so many times. I'm sorry. Oh Gosh no not really so last April so this time last year Me and Hannah we. She was in Alabama. And I was in Alabama as well. 'cause I was dating a guy from Alabama and we were going for my birthday. And we like took a picture and someone from shows or she's Q. And he knows like wow she has a boyfriend and I was like yeah. You know her right now. I don't really know always taken and then about a couple of weeks. Later me in the boy broke up and I was. I can't I'm single now. And she's like okay. Let's get it going so not necessarily like a whole like casting process. How do you know everything anyone else would? Yeah there you go all right. Do you own or rent your own home. I'm sure you do and I bet it can be a lot of hard work. You know. It's really easy. Though is bundling policies with GEICO. Geico makes it easy to bundle your homeowner's or renter's insurance along with your auto policy and it's a good thing too because you already have a lot to do around your home go to Geico Dot Com. Get a quote and see how much you could save. It's gyco easy visit. Geico DOT com today. That's GEICO DOT COM. A lot of people can't relate to it. We go through on the show. Did you have an overall overall? I mean we'll get into the nitty gritty. But did you have an overall positive experience during the show or did you find it really hard? It was incredibly difficult and had some really shitty moments but overall I had a great experience a lot of really great people and I'm happy. Were licensed that right now and I can look back in a raw really appreciative of the experience. I mean I I'm happy with it. You Know You. You seemed like you were being authentic and yourself and that's hard to do at a young age on national television and you know be dating in front of the whole world when people usually make really big mistakes in those times but Yeah I mean some people go through that show and the people that are portrayed as the villain or sometimes they aren't that person and they go through such a hard time and you know the Internet is can be a really toxic place and I'm sure you dealt with some online bullies. And how do you? How did you handle any kind of negativity or criticism coming your way that really hard for you or were you like thick skin? Well coming off the show it you know. My situation was very different from my past seasons. Where the show is still ongoing. Now you know I was engaged Peter but it was still ongoing. There are still issues So when I was getting you. Some online hey. I really wasn't even focused on that because I was trying to save us. You know the where my attention was. People can say whatever they wanted about me on the Internet but like that couldn't absorb any of my attention because the life has been sucked out of me trying to make this work for him and that was like all where right tension going towards And like I made certain decisions in the beginning when we were together I was GonNa Watch the show as Guan social media like making all these hard choices to where like I could be like. You know mentally and emotionally strong so that we could work this out And so that really helped me in the beginning but also I was going through. Hell trying to save US IN RICE. Engagement so relayed all nine hate. Didn't affect me that much. Yeah you had other things to worry about that. Were heavier than the trolls online. Oh yes much much heavier. Yeah I found it so hard. 'cause I mean we didn't really get to see too much of like how you guys do the happy couple weekends and hang out like that and we didn't see much of that. Did they. Film a lot of your happy couple weekends. Or how many did you guys have before that like? We just Kinda saw that one moment and it was kind of confusing. Yeah yeah and we had different videos filmed unlike pictures. You know from our happy couples. But you know that wasn't able to be show which it probably would have made a little bit more sense that you know like a nicer transition. But that was unfortunate. Maybe not really for me because I don't really want to see any of it for the audience for them to see like art connection more Any Navy Kinda like get an inside of more breakup probably helpful for viewers. I agree because I was so the whole season to me was a little bit confusing. If I'm being honest like it's choppy. It was so choppy and. I'm like wait. What is happening? And then for you guys to get engaged for us to not really see you know probably more than there was like you probably want more moments in connections and things going on that we didn't see and then all of a sudden they were. Kinda like and here's one really shitty moment from the happy couple of weekends and like now he's going back to this person like it was so choppy and so weird and I just it. It was confusing as a viewer. So I I was wondering from you like how many times you've always got to hang out and if it was kind of like I know you said it was. You went through hell. And there's a lot of hard times which of course the and that's a lot of couples that come out of the show you go through hell together while it's all being aired but did you have moments in those happy couple weekends where you thought it was going to work or did you kinda known your gut that this was doomed. I you know it was really kind of after we got engaged and then I found out about you know maybe girl that's when I was like. Oh this is going to be hard To to work through but I was very committed to making it work and so We had a couple two or three happy couples and we had. It was a happy couple. You know we had some really great times I think viewers miss out and seeing like our connection and seeing you know how in love we were at that time. So seen just the break-up piece of the break up it was for like people at I wonder what we're going to think about this because they will probably be confused. A record definitely didn't come out of nowhere you know we had some like you know difficult conversations leading up to it that we hosted by. We're going to try to make it work You know give us a chance because it was only Danda January or do we were together for two months and for me personally like when I was on the Bachelor I thought I was in love and I would have said yes. If got engaged to that bachelor and then it didn't take me long moving forward to look back and see that it was just like you know you're and I hate to use the word manipulated but you are a little bit manipulated. Because it's a show they're making it didn't take me long to realize that no that was not my person and I was not in love with him and it was a show and I wish him well but whatever do you look back now and be like. Oh that you know I was just in the moment in this show or were you. Do you truly feel like you were in love with this man and wanted to marry him. Yeah I look back. I feel like you know me moving forward Peter would have let you know. Let me go. Cryer turn engagement. I would have been months able to recover and really see the light so like when we were able to break up in January. The shock of it had to work through. And then Kinda like the anticipation of I'm going to see an F. R. is going to be single. What am I going to say to him? It was kind of like still ongoing and so now the past three weeks I feel like has truly been like a break up to where like unreleased from you. Know Him I don't have to act like I'm engaged or not engaged. I truly has been times. Like really think about over the last week like however really felt towards him and if we really could have even made it work and I'm not ever going to discredit felt toward San like I stand by. I was in love with him but see him and Judah scene where my life is at and like more of the women. I have become I you know. I do think that there's someone out there. That's when you more compatible for me the different traits that I'm looking for yeah. I don't think you know worth it right. No I'm happy. With where life is that you know. That's that's good. I think we're all happy and the most humble way I'm trying to say I'm very happy. Of course no I understand. Are you guys? I've been sticking close to home these days and I hope you are all doing the same. And that means ordering my essentials online when I can which I actually prefer to do whether I'm social distancing or not. I know a lot of you can agree with me on that one. Which is why. I want to tell you about persona razors persona. Razors are high quality super affordable. And right now you can. Order them for home. Delivery through Amazon Amazon dot com slash persona. My listeners will also get twenty five percents off their first purchase by entering my code vine show persona has been innovating and perfecting the razor since eighteen. Seventy five so. They definitely know what they're doing all of their men's and women's razors are made in the US with stainless steel and chrome blades. You will get a safe and smooth shave every time. I'm a big fan of the women's five blade razor. It gives me a very close shave without all the little nicks and cuts that. I used to get wall shaving. I really love how my skin feels when I get out of the shower after I use this razor which is why I found myself shaving constantly during quarantine. Even though I've no place to go get these fantastic affordable razors delivered straight to your door like I did again just visit Amazon dot com slash persona today and be sure to enter Code Vine show to get twenty five percents off your first order. That's Amazon dot com slash P. E. R. S. O. N. A discount code vine show. We'll be right back with more off the vine therapy now back to off the grave there so when it was the break-up and then you were going to see him on after the final rose you guys hadn't talked before that now. We HAVE NOT TALKED. We had not. How are you guys? Didn't like set up a little like okay. How are we going to handle this moment? I would have appreciated that. Why I would've I would've really appreciated that. So this is in between a break-up to AF are right downpours. No Nothing. I would have greatly appreciated that but no Y. Like what I don't really understand. He wouldn't he have wanted that to you. Know just to like go in like kind of you think you would think would want you know a heads up or I know some sort of pre conversation but I mean that's what I always were leaving prior to the breakup cave for bringing a break up. Just let me know like you know. Give me a heads So the affirmation who had no idea he had seen Madison after you? Oh no I had no idea. I had no idea so. I was sitting backstage hearing that for the first time I had spoken to my dad before after the final rose and My Dad was like hey like he proposed national television. You broke up with our national television. Just least Lau her like this moment in private to hear your with someone else and he said he couldn't answer that so I kind of knew I had a hunch like Navy. Something's going on but still had a did not know anything. That's so wild you were so composed and such a boss out there for that. 'cause I mean I think I think a lot of people would have just wanted to lose their minds and you know turn turn the finger pointed at them and the love what you were like you made it like really about who you are and how you've grown and what you deserve and I just I thought that was incredible. I mean the Firkin Kardashians thought it was incredible. So you know what that was a win for us really cool and I was thinking about you in that time because this was the first time in a long time the season hasn't been spoiled which was again confusing to me. Because you guys were together and people didn't know how and and that must have been really really lonely for you to not be able to have. I mean you have a support system as in your family or but you probably couldn't tell a lot of people because that's how it doesn't get spoiled and how incredibly lonely was that in that time to be going through such a hard time trying to make a relationship work everything being exposed on national television people thinking they know who you are but don't know it all and you're just having to stay quiet. It's been and it was so so hard because in the beginning I came back and I was processing everything but it was all excitement. You know like I couldn't tell my best friend I was engaged in. That was an exciting secret to keep and then really what was the most difficult was when we had the break up really in between our engagement to our breaking up towards the end when it was like hell with us it was so hard because people everyone in my life even my parents even know what was going on they could set something was off about me and then it was just so lonely. You know 'cause I just felt like I couldn't tell any like because I wanted to like not ruined a season. You know that was my worst fear. Is that people will come. She ruined the season for us. And I never WANNA do that. 'cause like the show it could be so much more fun and exciting at the Indian wasn't spoiled and I wanted to like always like you know. Honor thy honor my contract inside and it was so hard especially after when we broke up you know going. I'm like grieving. The loss of this future. I thought I had without and no one can know about it. No one can know that like every day. I'm hurting everyday. Like I take times or I just might. I'll be out to lunch friends. I'll just like go to the bathroom. Just cry and then come back and like I click. Everything's fine 'cause you still hard like you just can't be select trusting. I can't I I mean that's so impressive to me that you could do that because I thought I was strong when I came off my season with everything that I went through and I could not keep things a secret. I couldn't I needed to like rely on friends and people and I told things and I screwed up so badly and ruined my whole season but like i. That's so impressive that you were strong enough to do that. And just have you. Were kind of your own rock. And they're for yourself more than you probably even realized I mean because I felt so betrayed by him. I just kind of like wanted to shelter my own cell in just like I think honestly it probably did make it harder that I wasn't able to tell anyone it really made it a lot harder now. It's like now it's been nice because it's like the whole yet like every like me like openly talk about it and it has helped me like forward. Yeah they will at least acknowledged like the hurt. I felt at the time you know it. It gives you a little bit closer to that. You know you. You weren't just like out to lunch thinking that your you the the whole world doesn't know the story but from what they see. Everyone's so supportive of you know everything that you're doing and everything that's happened. So that's that's nice to know you can now you've gone through the thing of it? You came out the other side and there's so many beautiful things to happen in your life now in in the next few years from this. So it's I mean I'm really impressed by you for for being so strong because that's it's it is hell it can be hell and people don't really understand that but Especially going through what you did and and I was so nervous for like everything to come out like just the it was the weirdest feeling just knowing like I remember a week before after thunder rose. It still hadn't gotten spoiled or anything and I just remember me thinking like I was with my friends and just thinking like wow the whole world's going to know I had my heart broken the whole world's Gonna. I got engaged like this is something that will follow me for the rest of my life. And everyone's going to know about it and that was just such a scary moment for me because it's so cry that wants to feel Harper gain or rejected or no betrayed. And just knowing everyone's GonNa see that and like maybe have their. You know. Have their own opinion on how I handled. It was terrifying. It was a scary time. It's it's so terrifying. But it's also very relatable because who hasn't gone through a break-up or been hurt and It's probably probably really inspiring for a lot of women to see how you handled it instead of you know breaking down and thinking of like poor. What did I do wrong? It's like Okay No. I don't deserve that. And this is what I do deserve and I learned a lot about myself in the process and you know that kind of strength that I think a lot of women need to see for for coming out of a tough time. So that was amazing. All right got a real hitting question coming at Ya. What makes you feel Fab fit and fun for me? I feel FAB after I do. My skin care routine. Obviously I've feel fit when I'm dancing or biking on my new Peleton. No better feeling than breaking a sweat and getting those endorphins. And then I feel fun when I play card and Board Games Jason. My two dogs glass wine never hurts either. Well if you're like me and you like to feel Fab bit and fun. Who doesn't you have to look into the premium subscription box that delivers happiness and well-being to everyone everywhere. Fat that funds boxes are such a great way to get the coolest trendiest latest products without even leaving your house or doing any research on your own. Because they're making sure you get the very best. It does feel amazing kind of like Christmas morning. Every time you get your boxful of seasonal must have all to your door you can have fun. Choose all the products for you. Or you can customize some items I personally like to do a little bit of each so FAB. That fund has actually helped me discover so many brands and products that. I've incorporated into my life. I wouldn't have known about them. Otherwise if it wasn't for the box and my last box. I CHOSE CERTAIN PRODUCTS MYSELF. Like the chic and tonic silicone straws that. Let me get my Straw on without harming the environment but I also had fabulous fun. Choose products for me like the love script body. Wash that makes me feel like. I just left a SPA small. So Dang good fab that is happiness delivered straight to your door. Each season choose from a variety of beauty fashion fitness and wellness products to customize your very own box all without leaving your home it retails for forty nine ninety nine but always has a value of over two hundred dollars so use coupon code vine for ten dollars off your first box at Fab that fun dot com that's coupon code vine for ten dollars off your first box at Fab dot com. My other question was obviously have to talk about barb. The fact of course everyone was just like cheering. You on in the crowd and like giving you the like yes girl shaking her at our own Sun and like it was so it was so funny to see her expecting that much. Yeah so you didn't talk to her. Either I'm assuming or maybe you did but Because you see you didn't talk to Peter. Yeah I yeah. I talked to barb after a break up she. She reached out a couple times. So we had spoken I ended up telling her like we. Could you know talk on the phone because I need to like move forward and just you know isolate ourself anyone close to him because I was really at that point and just like I love his family? What grade do like I just? I really what what he's done to me so horrible. I just can't do it. You know I can't get involved anymore either. Like let it go like I have to accept it and there's no changing this you know especially when I knew what he had done was going to be like. This is all over the world like there is no like second chance there. You know right or no hope. I was Wondering like with the wave. Barb obviously loved you and that was the whole thing and then the Madison. Is there something? And you probably can't answer this or maybe you can. But is there something that we were missing as viewers with Madison as to why there was so much anger their disappointment and like was there something that we didn't see about her? Though that we're missing because everyone D- I don't WanNa say she got a great edit because maybe she is. I don't know her. I've never talked to her but I'm just like is the. What are we missing that his family was just so against this and obviously they were somewhat right because it didn't work out and his family did not have very nice things to say but I just found it interesting as viewers? We were so again confused. Yeah Yeah No. That was very like that was all kind of choppy. You know this coming out of nowhere and you know I think If I had to it would be. I had a really great connection with his family. My family has had a really great connection. They really believed in love. Pete me and Peter Together and I think they were just really rooting for us and I you know he comes from a really great family. I don't think Peter I don't think his actions are have like ill intent to them and I think they were just probably disappointed by the whole wishy washiness going for me to net someone else like he becomes a really good stable. Nice family and I think maybe that's where has more of that was coming from yeah And just knowing that they weren't gonNA work out. I mean obviously happened In again so that was another weird thing like. They had zero chemistry on the couch at the end. And I'm just sitting there being like. Hey wait I'm so confused because you guys were engaged. It seemed happy okay. Well maybe he wasn't so as happy as we thought that he went back to Madison. And they're sitting on the couch. You would think for him to leave the engaged relationship. He must be just head over heels for this person that he you know. This must be the love of his life to do this. Four Zero Chemistry and then it was done two days later. It was again confusing. Yeah I think there is so much happening with the family with them and such a mess and I like you know it was painful for me you know having to break up but like I got out of it and like I can start like to work on myself and not be involved in all of the the mass erased such a tornado seriously. Now does that jade you a little bit foregoing on to Paradise? Not Saying you would go on Paradise. Are that you are. We don't know anything but does that. Jd If you were to go on. And I mean yeah once again. That's like an putting myself out there to not only dating dating on such a public while I'm I'm just really happy with like my life right now and like where am I really just want to focus on me and like my friends and like my job right now. I don't know I would've never say never to paradise but at the same time I really liked the my rhythm like I'm doing right now. Good that's great. And what are you doing now? I mean let's pretend the quarantine isn't happening you move to La. What is your plan? Now what would you love to be doing? What are you going to be doing? What what what do you got going on? Yeah so I'm going back to prior to the show which is being a model and model out here in La prior to the show. So I'm just going back and doing you know what it had prior and it's nice because it creates like stability it creates me like like my career hasn't changed that much regards like what. I did before the show so I not really excited and You know happy future is. I've gone through like literally like but the show ending I I look back and I was like. I literally hit rock bottom like where I felt like. A bunch of broken pieces like after. Leaving the break-up I just felt like a ton of Burke's where am I going to go from year? Like how am I going to rebuild myself and so it's taken time and like I am working on it? Yeah of course you'll be working on that your whole life sister like keeping up with you know the pieces you'll always be trying to figure it out and getting better in your year off to a great start. What do you feel like because I I will say when I came out? The show's really really bitter. For a long time at producers at the show now I have a way different outlook on everything and so grateful but one thing I will always have said as I've I've learned through that show so much about myself and grew so much as a person and What what would you say that you learned the most about yourself most while I'm really good Cedar Keeper. That's you are way better than I was. No terrible that thing I learned most about myself is I can be content on my own right. I just completely content with myself in you. I am and not needing a whole lot. Not Needing a person to add to it Yeah that's that is. I can be like my own rock. I could be my own stray my Iraq. And you've proven that to yourself. So it's that's you know I I find that That's when you'll attract the right person as well as you know when you don't need them and they just add value to your life they don't you don't need them. Yeah yeah that's great. I'm proud of you. I don't even know you that well but I'm just so proud of you and then for for anybody listening. That could be going through their rock. Bottom what advice would you have for them? Don't feel like you have to depend on other people's to be your own strengths. Because I think that's the most important thing that I learned is because I could have had to be very picky about who I would open up to even like my mom and my sister just because it weighed so heavy on me just like keeping this in the ending or just any kind of like eight hundred opinion on anyone on the show just to keep that very private because I knew how explosive things can get on the Internet and just how mean patrols were and that was always a fear of mine and so my biggest ice would be just never doubt like how strong you are and not just like make just being like like disciplined about it and for me as I myself on a schedule and setting goals and like making hard choices like not watching this show or not going Sean Media. This Day you know making those hard choices really helps like create structure and so at least for me it creates structure to where like it's a it can be a constant when like everything else in your life interesting out of control like you. Have you know your constant of like try? Hard choices? You've made. That will help guide you absolutely. I love that all right so we all want to do the right thing to keep our bodies healthy in the long run but even if we try our absolute best to eat that Kale Salad drink that green smoothie were still just most likely not getting all of the essential nutrients we need on a daily basis. Which in my opinion is super frustrating. And that's why I love taking ritual. The obsessively research vitamin for women rituals essentials have the nutrients most of us. Don't get enough of from food alone. All in their clean absorbable forms no shady additives or ingredients. That can do more harm to your body than good. Ritual comes in too easy to take capsules a full of nine nutrients. You need to support a strong foundation for your health. I love taking ritual first and foremost because I know when I take it. I'm doing the best thing for me and my health and it's such an easy way to make sure you're getting everything you need. It's also traceable and transparent which is very important to me. Ritual is Vegan friendly sugar-free non. Gmo Gluten free and Allergen free and their sources are out there for the whole world to see so you know that what you see is what you get and last definitely not least ritual comes with a no nausea capsule design because we all know that feeling of taking a pill and immediately feeling gross when you get that like aftertaste. Every bottle comes with a mint tab to keep things fresh so not feeling better. Health doesn't happen overnight and right now ritual is offering my listeners. Ten percent off during your first three months. Fill in the gaps in your diet with essentials for women a small step that helps support a healthy foundation for your body visit ritual dot com slash. Find Start Your ritual today. That's ten percent off during your first three months at ritual dot com slash fine. We'll be right back with more off the vine therapy from the network. That brought you the cold case files. Podcast comes. I survived the classic stories. You know with new interviews. Updating each woman story with everything that happens after survival. I survived because I convinced him that I was a person. I survived because I was a smarter person than my assailant. I survived because I believe God sees me. Surviving is just the beginning of their story. Subscribe Wherever you listen to podcasts Austin vine grape therapy. Now we'll get to more fun stuff not so serious. I WANNA play games with you and we're going to. You obviously have to confess because that is part of off the vine as you gotta give me a good confession so let me have it. Okay this is. This is really funny when we did the photo shoot in Costa Rica with. The waterfall earned that for her. Cosmo me and say the name of the other girls probably can make me the girl we didn't Shea Osho. We had to wear Bikini. Kill you know. Oh My Gosh. That is like fear my own. No so what did you do? Just keep your arms down. We were like a like begging. Everyone like razors and they found his but literally it was like right before and we like it was terrible and they got so mad at as they're like they're like well girls like your increase or Rica. Like should've known like we did not understand that we were having to wear. Swim Zoo. Model it on national. Tv and it's going to be in a magazine like this adds up all my gosh. So they got you razors and then you probably had like. It's like what what is worse. What would you rather hair or razor? Burn showing yeah but we're in the middle of the rainforest so it is so hard to get. Luckily it was raining so it was like they push back the shoots. They're able to run out and get US raider razors but I was literally freaking out like. Oh My Gosh. Like on the edge of that stuff out. I mean they did some weird shit though with you guys with the bathing suit. Bottoms like the way they showed. Your guys butts was so weird. They made it seem like the bathing suits. Were like way bigger than they were. Yes yes they yeah. I did not like their shots. No those are I mean. At least everybody knew like everyone's like what what is happening here. And then it became like a thing on twitter okay. I have a couple of games here that I WANNA play with you one. You're not gonNA like this but one's called plead the fifth. So you have to tell me. I'm going to ask you three things you have to tell you. Have to tell the truth about one K. Okay so and then if I don't want to answer I say plead the fifth. No you just have to answer one way for okay. I'll I'm gonNA tell you saw I'm GonNa give you three options k. Okay what other. Okay listen hear me out for all three first one. What girl other than Madison from Your Season? Would you turn and start walking the other direction if you saw her on the street to what vegetable most accurately represents? Peter's manhood or three. What's the last text you sent to? Barb? You can only pick one and okay. The vegetable. That represents Peter's manhood would be cauliflower because it has no taste. That's good do forget that power needs like a lot of flavor needs like it's just like there's no taste so very accurate. Okay I I accept that answer. I was thinking more of a limp asparagus. But cauliflower wins yes but it's very good though I mean cauliflower Flan yes I am so into that answer okay. The next one. There's only two to choose from who someone from the House whose character you thought you knew but changed after the show or would you rather be corn to in with Peter Madison or Hannah. Abi Matson because we would probably have a lot to talk about. That's fair you guys would have a lot to talk about Then you'd have to do like a podcast or instagram live so that the world could hear what you had to say. I'm sure you guys don't talk right. Yeah I mean no me and Madison are cool. That's great because I find that through situations like this. You could probably bond over something like that and when it's all said and done like you were on the same show you know stuff like that you can get through that kind of thing. I find more so with women like you can come together through that and be friends at the end and I and I respect the hell out of that. Yeah we don't have to marry each other now. You know like it's not like we're friends you know it's not like it's not like one of us is different than dating you know. Friendships are very different. Inundating so yes. Yeah we're cool okay. Next game is just the last. So I'll ask you. The last things of these things kept so the last person from the franchise. You spoke to Victoria. Oh Spicy Victoria. Okay right is that is that the one victory yes? Yes yeah yeah okay. The last text message you sent last to my roommate to tell him to the dog out out. Well it's your sister's dog but I love to watch it just like recording Thi. This is nice to have someone like excited to see me when I get home. Absolute that's my favorite part. Now that I have to. I'm like how did I come home to nobody before? Like before Jason or the dogs like I was just coming onto like a big empty house. It was like okay the last the last thing you searched in your Google Search. Oh how to take off debt. Nail Polish. And did you find an answer because the people need to know no I did not I got acetone and it like it has not worked my nails so Roger? I won't even I refuse to show anybody else right now. They're discussing the last date. You went on disappointment last day. I I had kinda like facetime gate because real quarantine worked for in Queens. Had someone dropped me off the Coffee Zanjan Coffee but since times are different you know like I guess that could be considered the day not literally be like the show. Yeah no wait we. We know this person. Are we allowed to know who I call on? Mystery man a mystery man okay. Would we know who he is or know? Some people might. It's not from Bachelor. Okay okay. That's fair when when will you reveal mystery man? Oh well I'm not going to be exclusive with anyone for a while. I'm just like you need to know different people. You know as much as I can like virtually during the Corinthian because it's weird because you know I got off the show. I was engaged then. I was single but couldn't go out. You know couldn't go on a date or really texture new on because you know people no I. Wasn't you know age? And then after the show we go straight to being coordinated by all my gosh. My dating life is like so goal. Seriously you're gonNA fall in love with yourself after all this. That's crazy cave. We'll does mystery man know that you're not committed and that you want to date other people. Yes Oh yes yes. It's just like a nightside little cord team playing quarantine fling. You know. Everybody needs one of those. You just keep it fun and flirty. I'm into that the last thing you ordered in for food. Oh California Pizza. Kitchen a lot there or pizza. But with lots of different spices and flavours taught two different spices and flavors. And then the last time you were star struck in you know. I was anxious for this interview. I'm like oh my gosh like seeing her and I've been bad well. That is so sweet. That just made me love you even more. Thank you for saying that. I'm lake in a greasy ponytail sitting. I tried to give you some good lighting for this interview but Very good lighting. Nice eyebrows. Scan you I was GonNa say the same thing about you. I'm like I love. Your eyebrows is such a thing for girls to say isn't it? I got them to. My friend just turned to them for me. Ranked Orlin tinting eyebrows like trying to learn how to like do nail. Have you heard of this laminating eyebrow thing now what is that okay afterward on this interview just go Google? That will be your next. Google search it will eyebrow laminating. It's like a new thing that keeps them lifted bushy and upwards. And I want to do it so badly and you can do at Home Kit. So look into it really. Yeah we need all the at home beatty kits. We can right now. I I am not a do it yourself kind of Gal with when it comes to like beauty but I did cut my own hair the other day and I I think some people that listen to the podcast know this but I did. I took care schooler cosmetology for like three years so I'm not terrible but I'm trying to convince Jason to let me cut his hair because it's getting so long he refuse really. Yes he refuses. Let's talk about Lacroix. Growing Lacroix sparkling water delivers refreshment flavor and sparkle with an innocent twist zero calories zero sweeteners and zero sodium. There are twenty seven lacroix flavors and the newest additions to the family are Leeman Cello. Pass Tech. Which is French or watermelon. Lemon cellos literally tastes like sunshine and account it's citrusy Sparkley and delicious and honestly it might be my new favorite one. The Corey sparkling waters are Gluten Free Vegan. Kosher and non. Gmo whole thirty approved. An environmentally friendly lacroix cans are sustainable and recyclable. And they are the first on the market to be produced without BPA liner so enjoy. Lacroix sparkling water a healthier alternative for you and your lifestyle. The sparkling water is available. Nationwide so for a full list of retailers visit. Www DOT lacroix water dot com and for more information joined Lacroix community on social at Lacroix water. Okay just to wrap this up. I wanted to ask you one more. Actually no wait. I have a couple couple will will do a couple questions from listeners. And then we'll wrap up because Oh yeah people really want to know what you think about Peter and Kelly hanging out that's like everyone's main question l. l. Yeah no everyone. I am just Kauai. Oh Cool I guess I. That's super happy before right as a bachelor going back to like this person. I don't know I feel like well. If you look at like an no shame Hannah beach. She went from Jed to Tyler. Peter to Tyler. I don't know what's going on there. But they all I feel like a lot of people go back and like talk to different people. I don't know I don't know I'm going to say that this happened before another shot. Yeah that would be really hard to do but yeah. I don't know who knows how much they're hanging out. Probably know more than I do but everyone to know how you feel about it where it's so hard because it's for for me. I'm like I've been visit horns like you want to move on and you want to not you know or care about it so you're like I don't know what to say well and the thing is is that like I met Kelly through the show and so it's not like and like I'm cool with Kelly like we're not going to be best friends or anything but I'm definitely cooler but so it's not like Oh this is like my best friend like from now. She's dating like my ex fiance. You know right. He met through the show such a weird thing though because in real life. If that happened you'd be like bitch. What are you doing but in bachelor world? You're like well. What can I do that you know? That's just like part of the show and it's just such weird thing to say out loud like she was my friend and we're cool but she's dating my ex fiance's so whatever like just you know like we aren't going to be best friends or anything but she's she's always been nice to me so yeah yeah okay well. I mean. I'm not going to be angry about it. You know like I'm not going to be angry about it because like I'm just GonNa be elevate you know like I'm not missing anything. Yeah exactly you're like have fun. Have Fun with that one. I bought that one. Yeah if over that and then Katie said at the proposal part of the final rose. Typically contestants will give one final spiel to the bachelor pouring their heart out before seeing if they are the one or not she said. I noticed you didn't do that. How come I did did? They just didn't show it. Yes Yeah I did. I was so proud of my speech to like. I literally poured out my heart and when I saw like all learn it. There's so many of those moments. Yeah I'm like I didn't really know because I guess it would have been like more may more sense for like the audience or for the audience to see like more mine and then his but I guess I didn't have. I guess that was one thing I had to like see. Was there one thing from your whole season. That you wish. They showed that they didn't was at that moment. Maybe probably that moment Moments of being excited after proposal really just my inner are his interaction with my family and then my interaction with is family. 'cause like we have like a lot of time there and like some really great moments that would have been cool for audience and be like okay. Yeah we definitely see connection because I feel like For years it probably just seemed like a proposal came out of nowhere you know. There's a lot of built up a lot of serious conversations about our futures and like real life conversations that people getting unfortunate because I I feel like that would have been better for us to see that not not I mean. It's tough now looking back because it didn't work out so it's like well we didn't need those conversations but just during the show or during the airing of it it would have been nicer to see those moments especially because. I think we wanted to see more of those moments from you like. I don't think they showed enough of your real conversations and not you know I just think people would have liked to get to know you a little more. And they could've by hearing those conversations so anyways they can now because now you can you know do interviews go on podcasts. And like tell your side of the story and then and then the real. The good stuff happens when you're out of contract that's all I'm saying. They're real juicy stuff. I'm always like wonder people's contracts and I want to talk to them. Okay so at the end of my podcast. I like to give away an instagram. You were I tell somebody like a really good account to follow that kind of just you know in the in the mindless scrolling. I think a lot of people get frustrated or you know. Do the comparison thing and so I wanted to give a shout out an instagram away to the COM APP. Do you ever use this for meditation? Oh Yes yes yes. I've heard of this out amazing day. Get the APP but you can also follow them on instagram. They have a really great instagram account. It forces you to pause take a breath have a moment to yourself. Their instagram account is just at Com. There helping people to less stress less than live better. And sometimes they'll do a live looking instagram. Live where you can just meditate. And I'm obsessive meditation. So I love that and I'm going to give them an instagram for the podcast today. We're GONNA download that. Yeah you got to download it. Well thank you so much for being on the podcast and once this is all over. We'll do another one in person and I'm out that way all the time so We'll get to paradise absolutely we'll have a glass of wine will hang out and is there anything else you wanted to say before we go to. Everything's good now yet. Everything's GonNa be just thank you so much for having me. I can't wait till like see. You have glass of wine and like really that soon and let's hope in the next couple of months so stay safe and you're doing all the right things and you're you don't need me to tell you you're a strong bad ass woman because you know that. Oh absolutely thanks for listening to offer Vine Raith therapy tune into here new mini-stove every Thursday. Check out new full episodes. Every touquet exclusively on podcast. One Dot com the podcast one APP and subscribe on Apple Podcasts TV.

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Hannah and Dylan

Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

58:53 min | 8 months ago

Hannah and Dylan

"Thank you for listening to this. Podcast one option available on spotify apple. Podcasts podcast one dot com in anywhere else you podcasts. This week off the vine is sponsored by GEICO GO TO GEICO DOT COM and fifteen minutes. You could be saving fifteen percent or more on car insurance extra money in your pocket. It just may be the most rewarding to do you do today. Best means engage your brain with some puzzles and collect tons of characters. Trust me with over one hundred million downloads. This five star rated mobile puzzle game is a must play down best fiends on the apple APP store or Google play. That's friends without the our best fiennes cores. These days everything is go. Go go nonstop. Hustle has taken over. And it's kind of a lot if the pace of things is wearing down. Take a moment pause. Refresh yourself and when you choose to turn off reach for the one beer. That's made to chill and listen to your heart. The bachelor presents. Listen to your heart a six episode event Mondays at eight seven central on ABC. Tv podcast. One presents off the vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe. Caitlyn is creating space girls. Kim feel empowered to be themselves. Get ready for lots of last job on and wine get ready to shake things up. Here's caitlyn welcome to off the vine. I'm your host Kaitlyn Bristowe today on the PODCASTS. We've got power from Bachelor Franchise Dylan and Hannah are here. Being all cute and quarantined. Where are you right now by the way you go? You're in San Diego. Oh lucky you get to go outside or you guys on full. Lock down on people like walking around. We have a sorry people are walking around. We laid out yesterday in the backyard. Got Some Sun so it's really residential area so it's like people walk their dogs and stuff like that but you can't go to a beach. Yeah I mean yeah beaches I would. I WOULD WANNA fight you if you went to the beach. But that's good that you can go out go outside and get some Sun and what what is what is a quarantine day. Look like for you to well. For some reason I keep waking up later later. I don't know if it's like the time change or us just going to bed at two am which that's fine with it but Yeah we've been waking up. Lay on deal brings me coffee. I've been making breakfast and then we just do like little work. Things don't takes the nightshift which does not just Jason do the night shift. Do you have any clue what I'm talking about? I'm like sitting here so confused. What are you? What nate shift are we talking about the night? Shift a lot of friends since everybody's quarantined. They're getting back on xbox and like I guess whenever they're like why or fiances or girlfriends. Whatever GO TO SLEEP DYLAN? All his friends are hop on xbox. And you know playing the night shift I know during S- basically they just play all night so wherever us. We're just working the night shifts. Oh that's your secret little codename. It's the game isn't called night shift now. I'm a bit of Gamer myself. So I'd I'd like get mad at that I'd be like well I wanNA play to head. It does not want to buy you know I gave her over. There is not. We have like little headphones so that she can edit video and I live with my friends but I mean we need some sort of social interaction. It's whole again crazy. I've been doing a lot of talk. Check talk that's been taking up a lot of my corn Time I've just been like scrolling through it making beds. I hear that that's what I've been doing the same thing like kind of kind of borderline obsessing over tick tock if you will like that can be my night shift because it's embarrassing. How long will scroll that? And then like favorite all my videos and go back and try and recreate them. I think they call it why this might be wrong but I heard this they call it tick talk because like when you're on the time passes so quickly. I mean that would make sense. It really does like but my mic quarantine days are basically talk and grey's anatomy right now with a couple of calls mixed in there but that does make sense because all you do is scroll and get lost in like this like phone. Call of tick tock videos. We're both targeting. Oh don't get me. Started on tiger king basically all. I do is wake up in the morning and the second I roll over. I wake up Jason by saying hey hail you cool cats and kittens. And he's like Oh my God every time. Yeah so I'm definitely I I watched it. Did you guys finish it? Yeah we watched it in like two days. Yeah I watched it in one so I mean this is the time to binge watch shows. But what do you guys think overrated underrated? What do you think it's it's amazing? I think it's perfectly rated. I love documentaries. I I love like taboo kind of things so I was all about it for sure. Yeah no I'm trying to. I'm trying to find my next show to Binge Watch. That's an that's left me. I don't know how we're going to the bar set so high right now. I don't know how we're going to find another show. That's better than that one. I can't believe you can literally Buy Tigers for like five grand. No wasn't it like two. It was something ridiculous. It's insane. It is insane. That's a you know what's crazy too. Is that one of my guy that I know. And how my podcast he? His name is tyler rich and he lives in Nashville. He's a country singer. He was in the documentary like all of a sudden they like showed him holding one of the Tigers in Vegas and I was like. Oh my God. What is he doing in saying? Yeah anyways so okay. You guys obviously have some big plans. You had your engagement party need to know all the awkward run INS there and have you talked about this a million times that you're rolling your eyes right now it'd be like Oh my God. Do we have to talk about this again? I haven't really talked about it a whole lot honestly that night. We were so just busy like talking all these different people and stuff so I wasn't even paying attention to what was actually going on I do know that a lot of people said they had a good time. I was like that's A. That's a good. That's that's all that matters. It was about you guys and you know you're obviously you had family and friends and it was so nice that you guys could have that before all this craziness has happened because so many peoples weddings and everything's getting put on hold Do you guys have a date set? We don't we are just like saying how it's so sad. All these peoples weddings have been totally pushed back and with that we were like. Oh my gosh like it's not one of those things where you can be like. Oh yeah like maybe like a few months. We'll talk about planning it and all this stuff. It's like everybody else's weddings being pushed back now. So it's like the nice that you guys had the engagement party. What was the highlight? What's the highlight of your engagement party for you guys? My friends made cookies with like really really unflattering pictures may on them like when I was really fat nice all and then I just started like stuffing my face to them. I thought that was hilarious. That's good I like that about you. Hannah my dad. There's only told the story. Then which of the hi-fi or leaving or either one of the refunding you tell a high five one with my dad. He's your friend so my dad had such a good time at this Barbie What was the with your friends? Were like a bunch of my friends. I grew up with came and enhance. His Dad just grabbed it gravitated Pretty easily and they were doing these things were there. Laughing Boys Tommy G A bunch of twenty five year old twenty five kids and pouring beer in their hands and high fiving each other in my guys. Yeah he was like. Oh we have all these new handshakes there called beer high fives into their hands. And like hi Fi. Oh my gosh. He was the real. Mvp OF YOUR GUYS. Engagement Party rushed crushing the dance or Waas. That's so much fun. I love the idea. Engagement Party sometimes can be just as fun as the wedding. Because you have all your favorite people there and everyone's just like so happy to be around each other. Yeah I mean we got really really lucky with the timing of before all this craziness. Oh yeah absolutely and Are you guys in full blown like and using all this time when you're not you know gaming and doing everything else. Are you using the time to plan your wedding you know? We actually looked at some places in looked at some people that are doing it but I mean honestly right. Now it's like. How can you plan when all of these weddings right now or being so pushed back anyway is like all these venues are going to be taken? I think there's a lot of unknowns in the entire entertainment wedding everything type of Industry. Because it's like how long this is. GonNa last and planning right now just like near impossible. If you don't know which places or be open that's very but it is fun to look at places like I made like a little pincher spoiled with a few kind of fun things. But you know we're taking it slow right now and But it's been fun like while we're at home really why not. Let's look at some like spot. I mean you don't have to explain to me. I was engaged for three and a half years and didn't do any wedding planning I I. I did the same thing I was like well. I've got a pinterest board and that's about it. You know you go your own pace you go at your own pace especially coming off his show like the show that we all came off of. It's it's everything so rushed and you guys just take your time and do whatever makes you happy. And I'm I'm sure that's what you're doing and that's what it sounds like you're doing so do you own or rent your home. I'm sure you do and I bet it can be hard work. You know it's easy is bundling policies with GEICO GEICO makes it easy to bundle your homeowners and renters insurance along with your auto policy and it's a good thing too because you already have so much to do around your home so go to GEICO DOT COM. Get a quote and see how much you could save. It's gyco easy visit. Geico DOT COM. Today that's GEICO DOT com. I was wondering this question. Do you think you're compatible and you would have met outside of this would have been together. You like like do you talk about that. Ever I know I know that Jason is say that all the time like if Jason and I met without being the show like definitely somebody I would. I would have dated by nine percent. Yeah I asked if we'd be friends in high school the other day. Oh that's a good question. And and yeah yeah throws yes. We're both like awkward. We have the same exact sense of humour jennings impossible to find it. Someone how do you? How do you describe your sense of humor? It's kind of dark sometimes dark but like really just goofy like that's how we communicate ally in? It's not like we don't take anything seriously. It's just like we always have a safe space just to say like whatever joke we feel like or like sarcasm or whatever and. I feel like I term really awkward. I don't know about other people but like if somebody doesn't totally get like Kinda my humor in everything. I just kind of shut off in. Like a like what? It's it's not a fun conversation for me so I feel like we. A lot of conversations are just like I mean we do have serious side but you know that's that's important. I mean I feel the same way it's It's it's important to have the same kind of humor and if you both can have a dark sense of humor that's even better because that's me. I'm I can get down with a dark sense of humor can't we? Were talking about April fools jokes coming up. Give me your best one. We had a few but I think the one that we went that we're going to go with is I'm posting like a retirement announcement for Khorasan and then I'm also announcing that he's actually selected me to replace him as the host out of owning by out of anybody start listing people misspell. Like I was like well and then blake misspelled. Michelle Blake's last name and then like Chad Johnson. I misspelled his name. Is Out of La La la in money in shows me to replace them. I can't believe it. I think it's GONNA BE HILARIOUS. So hopefully people ask if not direct. Burgos Dolan Dana did again. That's the good part about like having be known as like being just dumb and goofy. Not Seeing that. You're sorry I'm thinking about myself here because when you do stupid shit like that then. Everyone's like oh they're just for you know Dylan bean doing nuts. It's it's the best you can get away with it. There's a lot of dough and being thrown out there nowadays. What Hannah do you have one that you're GONNA do on now? I you know for me something like that. I think it's hilarious. I really helped him like kind of come up with the Master Plan. But you know it. It's not totally on brand for me to do something like big like that but there might be some like little things on April first. That's give you a couple ones that my mom was always a big jokester growing up and she she used to do. There's one that she did where she had a spoon but should the spoon the like long end of the spoon was broken. And so I didn't know that but she put it up her nose and acted like the whole spoon was upper knows in that she got stock and like was freaking out and really really committed to it. So you could do that one. Maybe if you aunt for for for the Graham maybe that sounds pretty. Good actually yeah. That's where I get my weirdness from also I saw on my Alexa. I was like this is going to make everybody's Alexis off if I say but I. I asked her to tell me a good prank to do. For April first. Hers was okay she said. Do you draw a spider on like the roll of toilet paper but like far into the role so that when somebody does roll it that they're in the right spot to be scared when the shit their pants. That's awful. That is a good one. Yeah Alexa came up with that one so I can't my my good one that I'm going to do on. Instagram is all you have to do during your stories is say. Hey Alexa play fart noises or like do something stupid so that everybody watching who has an Alexa. Then there's goes off and the jokes on them. I'm best that's beautiful. We have a google so you might WanNa do. Hey Alexa I hate hoopoe. Oh and then. Isn't it okay? Google I know we're living in a time where we get our robots confused right Okay speaking of it could be worse. We're in this quarantine time it's like people are finding the beauty in you. Know reconnecting with friends and being in a moment and staying home and Blah Blah. Do you guys feel like what is the silver lining for quarantine for you guys. Feel like we're living together. Which is kind of Nice? I think it's a good test for you guys So we don't know we talk about getting a house. I like silver lining. We've never had this much time together since paradise essentially which again still relying here. That's true the paradise thing is since you guys up so well like beam as you guys know on Bachelor Bachelorette you get not a lot of time with the person whereas on paradise you'll literally spend all of your time with that person and and now living together like you kind of know what it's like being around each other that often which is. I think I think reason for a lot more successful relationships on yet you know just like being like Corentin or whatever together like I like staying in anyways. I saw this the other day. It was like Maija of like a fun weekend. Or whatever is being like technically quarantined anyways. So it's been actually really nice and surprisingly like I don't think we're tired of each other yet or I'm not sure if you are you tired there there you go and you know. There's I know I'm dillon. You're really close with Peter and Hannah. You knew Hannah and from before this right yeah okay. So why is Peter Getting Shit on left and right like just because he made bad decisions or whatever? He's still a good person so to me. I'm like Tyler and Hannah are doing their corentin crew. They're working out with big groups of people there hanging out there. Doing tick tock videos. Everybody is obsessing over it and that's fine. I'm not hating on that at all. Whatever as long as they're being healthy and then Peter picks up Kelly wants and he's the biggest asshole in the world and is like spreading the Corona virus for for picking her. Like what is going on there. Yeah I think once you have any sort of Flemish people will just continue to Kinda like go after it or any capacity like Beers. Peter's kind of taking that right now until there is like a new like into kind of like hate on Piers Israeli guy so I I know he's he's he's he's been staying at home in it only working really a majority of it So it's just it's just the nature of the beast. I mean I feel like I feel like you. You understand that I understand that handed gets it got at least a little bit got summer but like it's so near being in this world psych like whatever they see on TV then they associate like you can do no wrong or you know one thing when you know slip up happens or something that you can do it right. Yeah so it's just constantly living in that fear of like okay like you know I should you this writer you know. Somebody's yell at me for this and you have aware of the stuff that's definitely. I think what Peter's getting right now as Hanane being one of my friends it's obviously like I am biased zip but stepping back and looking at the situation as a whole. It's like like you know. Sometimes people just can't do anything. Ride and being indecisive is in the bachelor world a big no-no which which if you live in that world which we all have. It's like a natural thing like of course. You're going to be indecisive when you've got all these things going on. It's just I said sent me a message. And they're like can't believe you're sticking up for Peter like he's such a jerk and I'm like you're literally going off what you see on TV or the Internet win. Like I've talked to him in person like you Dylan. You're a friend of his like know him better than a lot of people it's like. No He's not an asshole just anyone who tries to go on TV and date this many people or or go through what we've all gone through is going to make mistakes and they're going to be a you know a human flawed human being. Who's living this in front of so many people judging us like anyone would make a mistake. And so it's it's just so interesting that you know it's great that people get so invested because you know it's fun and it's entertainment and we all get to have like this great platform afterwards and make friends and everything but it's also so hard and like you said. Dylan it's the nature of the beast. Where and I think Peter not to and correct me if I'm wrong but I think he's handling it so well like in the real world just being like you knows. It sucks in that people are going to be awful but at the same time this too shall pass and there will be another person in who knows how long now that will be in his position and it was definitely a new for him. This was my assumption of it. Was that like 'cause the second finished the Bachelorette. He was essentially in talks to the bachelor and then went to the bachelor. So he's never I feel like had time away from it all. Yeah so I I mean he's he's doing a great job it looks like him and his family are all you know all as well which is always good to see so now. I'm having for him. Yeah absolutely let's take a quick break and talk about needing a break every now and then. Why not keep your brain activated while you relax you can have fun while engaging your brain when you play the awesome puzzle game best fiends. It's literally so much fun and you can take it everywhere since it's on your phone so when you need some meantime best fiends is a great escape from the everyday there are thousands of fun challenges and tons of cute characters to collect along the way. I've been playing best for a while now and it never gets old or boring. Honestly it just gets more fun the more you play and it gets more challenging when you move up levels you really have to think about strategy to solve the puzzles. I'm also really attached to all the cute little characters in the game. 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It's called visor right. Yeah Oh yeah. What the Raina. Yeah so every day you work out. You can donate a meal at right now. It's the Sandiego foodbank. But I think we're working on a partnership with Revolution Foods and Jose Andrey's World Central Kitchen. And so each time you work out in meal get donated to them and that's free. It's paid for by companies that we partner with and on the flip side depending on whatever city or in some like we have restaurant partners. There you can get free drinks. Outsiders what a great idea yet. Second San Diego. You can work out three times. Donate three meals. Go to like to Cairo. Ganic Art Mendocino farms and get a free drinks. So it's it's been a blast in its tried to make it as accessible Oslo So yeah no. It's it's been really really fun. That's a really great idea. I love when people do things and have the element of giving back in So what is your the CO founder? Right yeah my cousin and I started here because it that's awesome. And then so. How did you guys come up with this idea through? My cousin was have you ever heard of semester at sea? Now it's like the singer college kids get to go on a cruise essentially for a few months and just see the world at it. Sounds amazing I wish I went But shoes in a social venture incubator and like was challenged coming up that idea and she came up the original idea of working out donating and getting a skinny Margarita at the end of the week. And which thousands beautiful if you think about it And then so she came back and we talked about it for six to eight months just like every day where outdrawing screens on papers like trying to pass time and then at the same time. My Dad was diagnosed with cancer. And I personally just reevaluating lacking by life and one day we were just like. Let's just go for it so I quit. My job moved down from San Francisco. She moved out for Maryland. We moved into this like three bedroom. Duplex superstar like seven hundred square feet. It was myself salmon. Another girl all we didn't have any furniture. We're doing good dollar a day food budget. It was pretty crazy. But we've since come out of that which is great But that's that's Kinda how it started so the plans to open up the APP so you can work out anywhere in the country and donate a revolution foods who puts healthy meals entitlement schools. So that's kind of where we're at. It's it's been a blast we've got like a eighteen and twenty thousand people who were waiting to use it outside of San Diego. So it's it's been pretty fun. Wow what a great idea. That's for you for doing that. I always I just love hearing people's stories about you know Jason is someone who is very familiar with the situation as as people. Who Have you know these blueprints of what they think their life should be and and what you know go get this education and you go get this job and breaking that blueprint insane but this is what I actually love to do and going after it? Even it means. You're if you're doing like you know the dollar meal a day and like just going struggling a little bit to just do what you love to do something that you're passionate about and I think it's just that's when people in my opinion become so successful is when they do things that make them happy and when they when they break that blueprint so good for you for doing that thank you. I'm trying to get handed a to start her own thing. I think she would absolutely kill it. So maybe you can maybe you can crusher a little bit. I'll pressure the shit out of her. What what are you thinking Hannah GonNa do? Yeah like what? What are your passions? What like if you could have a dream. I mean you kind of have a dream job but what is like what. What would you wanNA start if you were to start anything? I think you'd be a really good person for me to talk to about my idea. Like we've kind of talked to a few people about it. Sorta and it is some type of accessory thing and serves. You don't have to tell me too much because obviously you'll law no like you know announce it on your own but yeah. I'm I'm definitely here to help. Yeah no I think we should definitely have a conversation about it some time. I'm like oh my gosh used to totally do it. So maybe we'll see that's well that's great. I mean I heard it in your voice. You lit up a little bit when you thought about this idea and started talking about it so I think that's a sign. It's definitely a sign. I WanNa talk to you about it for sure. I will Off off the record as they say we will talk about it. And I'll I'll help you in any way you need so and it sounds like you've got a little entrepreneur over to your side there so between the two of you and I want to know because I ask all couples this question. Have you taken any Graham test? No why do you notice? I actually don't really know what it is but I don't for like three or southerners. Is it that one? Yeah Yeah you're a number yeah Having taken it. That's I'm going to challenge you as a couple to do any of them. I think there's an APP I had any Graham specialist or like like she knew everything about any Graham numbers and she came on my podcast and she told me about an. I think it's called the any APP I'll send it to you guys and it's just like obviously as you know being in a relationship that seems if you ask me from falling you guys on Instagram. It seems healthy. But you know that communication is like obviously key in a relationship. And you're any Graham number basically gives you information about how the other person responds to certain situations how they deal with stress how they deal and happy times and there you have different ways of thinking like when you're in your healthy sell fewer you're a certain way or if you're in an impaired way of thinking you might respond differently to your partner and it works for all like relationships business partners friends like just just to know each other's patterns. I guess and understand them better and it just does wonders for relationships self and not sponsored by anything to say this. 'cause I just very passionate about it. Which which numbers are usually like the prettiest best shave like like the most compatible? You mean oh you're saying like prettiest Abe like physically probably the year. I sure three. I'm not going to tell you I don't know what it is. You could be tricking me in something. Y'All I thought I was three for the longest time in threes and I was so proud of it because I'm like oh I'm such a go getter and like bragging about this being a three and it turns out. I'm not I'm a four with a three wing. Which doesn't make any sense to you because you don't know what I'm talking about but do do the research and do the test. It's kind of you know how people talk about 'em relationships like love languages. Yeah yes talked about that. Yeah it's a more Dialed in version of that. But okay then tell me. Your love languages. This make him the shock to people but I'm definitely physical touch and then second probably words about formation. Okay and Hannah what are you? I'm the words and they do things for you for active service Exit Service on my. Gosh huge service. Now do you think you guys can change as like you grow? Because I think I used to be. Actually I still am a bit but like I've always been like I need words words of affirmation but now Jason is like he shows love with the words of affirmation so now I'm getting that and my tank it's foolish they say and so. I'm like okay. Now I need acts of service because like now just like when when the house is clean or the dishwasher is unloaded. I'm like ooh that's hot. Like keep that so. Do you think you can like change or have you always been that way definitely always been this way. I'm sure like we're only twenty five and we've been together for what like nine months now? Something that I'm sure I'm goes on. It'll change. I'm so excited for you guys. You're are you both twenty five? Yeah okay. So here's my prediction twenty. I always say on my podcast. Twenty seven is such a pivotal time for people. And it's just like a proven thing and so many people who listened to the PODCASTS. Say that they felt the same way. Like twenty-seven is just this time in your life where you really come into your own and from what I see on the outside. I see that already within you to as you kind of already been through unique life experiences and you know you you've gone through things other people probably have in life and especially in a relationship given the show you've been on that. I feel like you already kind of have come into your own a bit learned so much about yourself that you guys are going to be your best at twenty seven in the relationship and individually. That would rock. I mean not that you'll go down after that but like just you guys get get to twenty seven and see where you're at together and I bet you in that year. You will thrive as a couple. I love that now brochure. So Twenty so twenty. Seven will be good in the night shift. We're GONNA replace tonight with doing the Anagram Ram. Yeah I'll send you guys the APP but we how do you even like? When do you sleep dylan? If you're doing the the night shift I mean nationals. Not so like it doesn't go to. Am Okay like sometimes like. I don't sneak eleven to twelve twelve thirty in that I wake up at like eight and start my dad. Okay oh well are you guys early. Are you early risers? Because I am not know Hannah you were just saying at the beginning. You Get up early herb you later. I moved wake up like I would go to work out. I live right next to like a bunch of studio so I would workout like seven. Am but now. My whole routine is messed up. I mean we. We were sleeping until like nine ten o'clock curfew days like it was. I don't know what's going on. Yeah I mean that's Rawal all we're all in it together. I think I got outta bed at eleven thirty today so mine. Impressive is it. Is it or is it like a little bit embarrassing? I think it's fabulous. I mean what? What are we all get up for right now? Anyways I'm tired might as well just keep it's true for some some sort of like you know ambition or having seen a little bit responsible. I don't know you're right. I can get up whenever I want so life. Today is kind of a lot. And that's putting it lightly we always have to be on whether that's in our relationships work zoom meetings or just day to day life but every now and then it's important to stop crack open a mountain cold coors light and chill so when he choose to turn off. Choose the beer. That's made to chill. I so often. After a long day of interacting with other people whether that's in person or virtually right now I really need a moment to myself. Just relax some of the ways. I love to get my mind off. Things is taking the dogs for a walk watching an episode two or three or four or five on net flicks Taking a bath but my favorite way to chill is simple I crack. Open a coors light. There's only one beer out there that's literally made to chill and that's coors light. My favorite part is the mountains on the bottles and cans. Turn blue when your beer is cold. Cool coors light is brewed with a three step. Cold process called logger cold filtered and cold package so it's actually made chill the mountains on coors light cold activated bottles and cans turned blue wind. Chill to perfection born in the rocky mountains of Colorado Nineteen seventy-eight coors light is refreshing crisp. And only one hundred and two calories which is pretty amazing. That's why coors light is the one I choose what I need a moment of chill. So when you want to reset reach for the beer that's made to chill. You can have coors light delivered by going to get dot coors light dot com and finding local delivery options near you celebrate responsibly coors brewing company Golden Colorado. We have to confess because as you know that's part of the podcast and you had a good one last time. My Gosh when I peed on my friend shoulders Yes star. That's that's okay. You don't have to like one up your last confession but the the bars high for Dylan or you guys can do on as a couple what do you think or do you do one do. I. Yeah I mean I try to. It's as much as I say like. I embarrassed myself all the time. It's just hard to come. It's hard for me to come up with a confession every week. But I've got one for you. Oh sweet okay. What are you guy? You know it's it's it's quarantine time and toilet. Paper is Is a hot ticket. These days it's used for currency I think and the most embarrassing part of this is that we actually did have toilet paper and I didn't think we did and Jason was at the store to go look for some. I had to use okay. So the dog's always rip up their tennis balls and there was like a piece of the ripped up tennis ball by my feet at the toilet and I use that to wipe. Wow Yeah yeah. After it out it was a it was a low point for me but not not my most embarrassing confession. But I mean it's up there you're you and Ben Higgins one insane. What did he do doesn't have a rag that he showers? We does he ben definitely. We're going on his on on Wednesday so I'm GonNa ask ask him about that. Oh my gosh and I mean it's so funny 'cause the whole world we live in. Ben was on my season and then became the bachelor and now he's engaged so big congrats to him because he's one of the loveliest loveliest human beings I've ever met in my life. Oh great oh my gosh. I forgot he was on your season. I know I kind of forget to. I swear to God I blacked out that whole that whole time. Not because he's not memorable because I just blacked out my whole season and my brain doesn't go there so yeah. Could you point to a picture of every guy on your season and say their first and last name not night one people but everyone else yes I could. I feel like I'm still friends with quite a few of them. Just like jared was on my season and I'm friends with him and Ashley a Ben Nick. I'm friends with Nick now. Which is a funny story. Benzon like there's A. There's a lot I had a lot of really good humans on my season and I feel like I'm still friends with quite a few of them. We'll be back with more off the vine this Kaitlyn Bristowe. This is house of Kim with Kim Zodiac billions until excited. So thank you guys so much for tuning in this episode of House of Cam. We are number one right now. Just keep going and going and going and going poured glass of wine at this point. You guys don't know if that gave me a really bad headache. All good took him to subscribe to house of Kim Apple podcasts. And podcast one so you don't don't be Tony for any HA whatever now back to off the vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe back to you guys confessing. You're getting away from like the best but hey happens So this is how maybe like twice or so But like you know I'll be like out to lunch or dinner or wherever and But I'll say a specific time one time I was out for dinner and we are the pizza place you're going on and the family comes up because this girl like loves the show. Apparently she really loves show and she was like all my gosh like. Can we take a picture? Whatever and again I I I I love it when people this joke will like whatever but she was like oh my gosh and then she starts telling her family about their like she was like this is Hannah she was the Bachelorette only and the the worst part is that they literally walked away. I never told them. I wasn't the Bachelorette. I just went with it because it would be awkward at that point. The shoe so excited her family's like no way. Oh my gosh I just kind of like acted like I didn't hear it but you jeff introduced me as the Bachelorette so you know Sorry Hand Brown eyed wrong. Hannah story metlife what. That's more embarrassing on her part because she didn't know so it's it is what it is. Oh Jeez there we go. There's my story. Would he got Dell? You've got knocked this one out of the Park Mario. Yeah Mine's pretty good. Thank you for five in his mouth. And the football okay. Runs is pretty amazing. Not just like hype it up but it's pretty good okay. I'm ready. I was moving down to San Diego but I'm spending like a few weeks living with my dad like Taking care of everything and we went out to. He didn't come with me. But we went out to Like this popular bar in Santa Monica and the night before I've a fake front tooth. I was really nervous. For some reason. I camera wiles biting my fingernails and cracking it and so like it just fell out essentially so I was just walking around with like a missing tooth pretty much like I had like a little nub shaved down and they put the cover on so the cover broke given that kind of makes you look tough like you look like you. Were maybe a hockey player. I looked like a pirate but like Tiger King looks like jobs all essentially and then I went to CVS and I got like There's literally something specific like gluing your teeth in but I think it's Burger dentures glue- glued my thing in altogether might be girls earn. Mar. I gotTa look good and we get to is bungalow. So we get the bungalow and start and I started talking to this girl like all going. Well like wow like killing right now. This is big and then. I like ss really hard because it would like move the the frontiers and I said like some word with ask my tooth or spell out like right right there on over thirteen So being like the freak athlete that I am I caught it in midair and I just couldn't put it back in and she was just like looking at me and I was like so yeah and I just kept the conversation going. Never know you just acted like it never happened. Yes I mean. What do you want me to do like we looked at each other? We acknowledged did happen. Like she just looked at it and it was just like Oh my bad and I just put it back in long story and then just kept going so I'd say it was like top five. Smooths things I've ever done yet. Catch the catch really like That that that's a big win on your part because if it hits the ground you can't put it in your mouth but if you catch it like you're still good to go. I would apply second. Yeah I get back in the game. We'll have you guys ever seen the movie. This is forty. No it's like Leslie. Mann and Paul is unify in that. Sounds like a funny to you too. Now that's a good guess. But it's Leslie Mann and Paul Rudd. Yes I think. I've only seen parts of it actually. Well it's really funny. And she liked tries to get out there and go to the bar and have fun with her younger employees and it's Megan Fox and and all these hockey players show up and they're at the bar and he like actually pulls out his tooth and girls kind of dig that because then they're like he's an athlete so I mean your tooth fell out and you Kadett so you're like a true athlete. Espn were saying later on running it. But I'm Alex I was pretty surprised myself. Asthma's every other person at bungalow who probably thought so. Why is this bungalow? Plays such a big D- like I always hear about the spot. I'm it's pretty fun if you go with your friends but it's just like I don't know yeah before the show before the show it's a blast but now it's just kind of like a shit show what what is what makes it so fun though was just like an outdoor bar on the beach like it's just like a hot spot. Yeah it's a hot spot. Okay I got you. Okay we handle. What was your confessional yet? I had something to say. Oh the Oh yeah okay. So I was in Italy. This is kind of a funny confession but again it's along along the lines of your story but I was in Italy with my girlfriend and we're in the pool and we meet this couple and it's this this older gentleman and his wife and I was like you know just listening and my girlfriend close. She's she's such a like she'll befriend everybody and so she's talking to them and they're talking about guilty pleasures in. This couple was like. Oh we just love the bachelor and the Bachelorette like that's guilty pleasure. And I'm like my ears perk up and I'm like I'm not gonNA say anything like from much show like obviously not and and so they're talking. Cleo goes oh who is your favorite Bachelorette and the guy. No lie says well. Whoever is not that drunk girl from Canada with tattoos on her arms and I just laughed. I locked so hard and I looked to them. I said that's me and he was like Ha- like looked at me. Like I like what a Weirdo telling me and I was like no literally. That's those actually me. And his wife was more defy and they like came up and bought US abolish champagne after and he was like honestly. I was just trying to say something like because you would like. I don't know he was so panicked but it was hilarious. Like I was like totally doesn't matter do you. Are you know it's your opinion and I wasn't the most loved Bachelorette? It's all good. It was so funny but yeah that's on that same note. All right we know you love the bachelor the Bachelorette and of course bachelor in paradise. Now the next bachelor chapter begins Monday on. Abc The bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. This new show has everything. You love about the Bachelor Romance. Hot TUBS MR Chris Harrison. And of course the drama drama drama but with musical strings attached twenty single musicians will step inside the bachelor mansion to embark on an incredible journey to find love through the power of music. The harmony of the couples will be tested by their relationships and judged by some of the biggest names in music like Jason Mraz and Kenya and Bachelor Nation Fan favorites. Which of these new bachelor hopefuls will make beautiful music together? Who Will Strike the right note? And who is there for the song reasons the bachelor presents? Listen to your heart a six episode on Mondays. Eight seven central on ABC okay. I won't go. I won't keep you too much longer but I just have one quick game to play with you. I'm really into the Games on this podcast. Okay so we're just GONNA do a couples who's more likely and then we'll we'll We'll finish up. So are you guys playing so many games during cornering because Jason? I cannot get enough of any game like monopoly card games. Everything won't take me back. Who Won't takes you back through. Oh what do you mean no? I'm just kidding I'm not talking about what what what are you. Guys do is complete. I can't tell if you're like serious or if he's really not texting you back because he he was like. Oh tell them I say hi back. We're GONNA grew text with with Laura the other day and it was A. It was getting funny that weight. I feel left out I should but it was fair very fair. Okay okay. Who is most likely to clot back at a troll Dylan? Poet has more trolls than I think. What do people have? I don't get it. I don't even get what people bad things people I'd have to say about either one of you. I think it's my sense of humor doesn't always come off the bus. Yeah I get that totally get that I mean I don't have the the best boulter and like sometimes it's like what I'm saying just may not need to be in real life. I've I never am like really worried about like he's just like the sweetest highness amazing human ever with like little things always and then so. I see it online. I just want to be like a like no. You don't understand but I mean whatever it is what it is but they'll never understand though But I am. I am one to clapback while most likely to walk around the house naked. I would too girlfriend Tampa let it. I don't know that's great. I would be most likely in the relationship as well most likely to get arrested. Honestly probably him. No you get arrested for tax fraud for putting something off. Probably I mean like just because. I like this overwhelmed but I do. We do make sure that always thing. But he's always on top of the out he's like. Hey we need to do this this this Mike. Okay I got. You think you'd get arrested for what you're really push the limit. Sometimes and I feel like I don't know mine would be like peanut. Public are can be pretty infuriating. Sometimes if I choose to be like the little brother and so that could maybe like 'cause a fight but I wouldn't fight back but I can still get arrested really bad things like tax fraud. Yeah it's not ex- fraud now it's GonNa be like your tax issues. I definitely like the new pauly. D. D. J. Paul Dini like go to jail for tax fraud or no. It was not my situation. Oh you're right you're right. I've got my people mixed up. Yes you're right now. We are keeping the situation under control one hundred percent but I think get arrested. We'll put it on Dylan. Oh most likely to be on another reality show. Probably I've been trying we've been binge-watching Vander pumped roles so I'm trying to get Hannah job at Sarah. So she can get on perfect. Have you ever done a bartending job Hannah on now? That was a hostess before pro-life two years and we did a little bit of bartending kind of work so been pushing temptation island on us. I don't WanNa go. I haven't I haven't been pushing that show on US temptation island. Oh my gosh I always set my one thing that I say like I would rather and then you say something bad than do something. I would rather shit in my hands and clap than go on temptation island. Oh my God one hundred percent. That would be a terrible. It'll get worse now. Couldn't do it okay. Most likely this is good for you guys because you both have the same sense of humor. Most likely to wrap up. Wow to laugh in the wrong moment. Me Hanna Hanna Hanna definitely because she just I'll just like look at her and she'll just be going on. What you want is so fun poker face pretty well sometimes like I like if I have a single motion my head like I will think the exact off percents that I'm supposed to in like a moment like it always happens on the show like always constantly. I would just start laughing at something and I was like. Oh my gosh. I know I shouldn't be laughing right now. And it's just uncomfortable. I feel like we've told the story in paradise. Taj Ron was crying essentially to Hannah and Hannah just started laughing. She was no. I was just like I was kind of like semis. Filing in my head why am I smiling right now and then it made me smile more while idiot and then I was telling her I was like sorry. I'm just like so dumb right now. And she was like kind of laughing. But I don't know as I love with people like react like awkwardly in situations like that. It's because it could help the situation as well so you. You probably helped her. Yeah I'd like totally okay. That's the end of the game and then the to wrap this up. I just want you guys to tell me your biggest pet peeve about each other and what you love the most about each other there you go first you go first. You don't know now you know and will. I love Hanna because she's very selfless and makes me laugh. You know and biggest pet peeves We we have so many things that we want to do that. We don't do any of them like plan like plan. The wedding live together. What else get a dog. Get a puppy. Have a hard time. I have to do like action items to actually do it because sometimes I just have so. Many things jumbled up and I'm just like trying to knock it all out and then I just don't end up getting to anything sometimes so I really don't get that busy. Those are both really cute. They're busy. I read near ends all all in this house. I run eighty different errands. There's so many things that I do in the sporting team. You'd think I'd be bored. I have I not myself the new this old so busy busy. I bought a frigate a pressure. Washer the other day and wash my back patio like I am so domesticated during this on the desk and some chairs to what we're doing we're just redoing. Hey that's a great thing to do. I'm doing the same thing. I went shopping on wayfair today and went ham. That's awesome it's good stuff. It's good stuff okay. Hurry you're GonNa Vegas appease My biggest pet peeve is probably Sometimes he like will. I think he's still adjusting to this whole new. Like you know social media world so sometimes she'll react without thinking like Oh. This could seem like this. I have to tell him. I'm like you know it could be seen like dance. And I just feel like I. Constantly semi constantly have to remind him that. That's probably a pet peeve and I I don't know I. I was like sitting down yesterday and I think I was like. I like told him five reasons. I like Webcam so lay in the Nikon. Like we do exercises like that all the time like I just think they're so five but important too. I love that yeah I don't know it's like insanely easy for me. To just like hang out with Joe I guess okay. I like that. You are like a very safe space for me. I can say or feel however what he's very like accepting power however I feel or what I WanNa do and how supportive you're and he doesn't care that he's just supportive Makes seem like he's like the least like Alpha person in the relationship but he I don't think he cares because he's support him so that is really sweet and also very important. It's like one of my biggest pet peeves when people in relationships can't like support the other person or get like emasculated or insecure like you should be each other's biggest you know like fans so I love that. Yeah definitely her her parents and our our biggest fans. I I have most amazing support system ever so even if I'm like totally sucking something I stole like in the back of my head. I'm like well at least I'm pressing them. Somehow I love that I mean and for people out there who I know. There's so many people who don't have the most supportive family or if they come from tough times like you can make your own family. You just need to support yourself a you need to find people that support you and surround yourself with them. Yeah I definitely feel like super grateful about it. So that's amazing. Yeah I love ending it on that note. That was really nice. And you guys are just so sweet and Dylan. That's I love what you're doing with the APP and everybody go download. It and Hannah talked to me about whatever project you want to work on. I will support you in any way I can and thank you guys so much for for podcasting with me today. Thank you so much for having is anytime. It would be a lot more fun in person because I pour you my wine and we would be able to to see each other but this is how we have. Corn Team podcast. And I'm just so grateful. I still have a job to a happy hour three in France. Oh yes great idea. Let's we can also do a happy hour instagram live. Let's do it. Let's do like a date night because apparently we still have a few more weeks of this stuff in indefinitely after roll Jon like hibernating and hiding out than let's hang out or yet because you live in one of my favorite cities right now so yes. It's one of my favorite places. I love it. There was the jury still out but we might get in. The House. Here knows well. That's you know what that's my. Click Bait for this episode. Dylan Hannah Getting House together. In San Diego Godwin Tax Rob away. You're right that's that's a way better. Click Bait Headline Armor thanking reminded me of that so this instagram is GonNa come to you today from an account that Super Uplifting. Cool Fun to look at visually. It's called at positively present. They share really really cool artwork quotes and messages that especially now are really great to take in and remember so it relaxes me so much. Just looking through their feet so I hope it relaxes you too and that is my instagram. Any of the day. Thank you so much. I'm Kaitlyn Bristowe and I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to divine with Kaitlyn. Bristowe get new episodes every Tuesday. It's police on podcast. One Dot com the podcast one APP and could strive on Apple podcasts TV.

Hannah Dylan bean Jason Mraz Kaitlyn Bristowe Bachelorette google GEICO San Diego Alexa apple Graham Instagram US Peter ABC fraud Engagement Party Kim tyler rich
Grape Therapy: Erin Treloar

Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

1:08:56 hr | 8 months ago

Grape Therapy: Erin Treloar

"Thank you for listening to this. Podcast one option available on spotify apple. Podcasts podcast one dot com in anywhere else. You podcasts. This week scrape therapy is sponsored by GEICO GO TO GEICO DOT COM. And in fifteen minutes. You could be saving fifteen percent or more on car insurance extra money in your pocket. It just may be the most rewarding to do. You do today caliber cal. Cbc believes everyone deserves a little piece in their pocket. So get twenty percents off your first order when you use Promo Code vine at try CALLAPOLLO DOT com slash vine human. Get your super grapes. Soft CHEWS AT SUPER GRAPES DOT com slash. Fine and get a free thirty day supply with your first purchase lacroix enjoy sparkling water a healthy alternative for you and your lifestyle. Lacroix sparkling water is available. Nationwide for fullest of retailers visit Lacroix Water Dot Com and for more information joined the Lacroix community on social at Lacroix Water and SPA. Finder give the gift of relaxation with SPA Finder. The world's best-selling SPA gift card go to SPA. Finder DOT com slash fine to save fifteen percent off gift cards of seventy five dollars or more or enter the Promo code vine at checkout. So do you own or rent your home? I'm sure you do and I bet it can be hard work. You know it's easy is bundling policies with GEICO GEICO makes it easy to bundle your homeowners and renters insurance along with your auto policy and it's a good thing too because you already have so much to do around your home so go to GEICO DOT com. Get a quote and see how much you could save. It's GEICO easy. Visit GEICO DOT com today. That'S GEICO DOT COM. Podcast one percents off the vine grave. There take them brisk jokes to answer your question drink to your concessions and you have to say about anything bachelor. Let's shake it up. Some more years Caitlyn. Welcome to a great therapy. I'm your host Kaitlyn Bristowe. Your session is now. Starting I could not think of a better time to have this. Next guest on my podcast. She is the founder of raw beauty. A wife a Mama. A host of Ron Inspiring podcasts. Raw beauty talks. She is first and foremost health wellness coach but she takes us beyond the highlight reel of influencers and wellness gurus and shows us what health and wellness really means. And today we're going to experience the And today we're going to experience that behind the scenes realness up-close Ladies and gentlemen. Please welcome the beautiful. And empowering Aaron Tra- Laura Thank you. Kaitlyn no such a nice introduction. I'm so excited to be here today. Yes very excited to have you. You've been on you've been on the podcast a few times now and will continue to be on a few times. More people who have missed previous episodes. You just give us a brief background of kind of who you are and how you become one of the most inspirational gals out there in my opinion. Oh my gosh for you So my name's Aaron to Laura. I am a Mama first and foremost of a four year old and a two year old. We are all currently in self-isolation and we are hiding out. Pardon me are you in Vancouver? Were in whistler right now so Yeah we decided to come here because there's a little bit more space for the kids run around Obviously we don't have childcare or anything like that right now And so were yeah. We're navigating that I'm a health. Coach is my profession and the founder of Rob Beauty Co And with raw I started it about seven eight years ago. Now just crazy and my whole goal with it is to really inspire and empower women with the tools to feel amazing audie from health perspective from a mental perspective. Helping them find confidence in who they are and so through that. I've had an opportunity to work with some incredible brands and so many amazing women yourself included yet. I think a lot of times when people think of following someone on social media and they think health and wellness. They think they have a picture in their head of what they're going to see on that instagram page. Whether it's models in swimsuits or whatever like these healthy bodies look a certain way to some people in their mind and I think that intimidates people so tell us about what they're going to see when they go to your page you're gonna see all different kinds of women what health looks like in all different ways. I think that women that you're describing the like woman with the six pack. Who was you know six feet tall and the model in the nineties? That was for a long time. What I believed health was and because of that. I really ended up struggling with my own body image with my relationship with food and in high school I developed pretty severe. Eating disorder ended up hospitalized for about three months which was incredibly hard at the time obviously But at the same time now. I'm so grateful that I went through it because it really was a springboard into learning so much about myself and I'm into this conversation. We're now having about what does health and wellness really look like. Because we've been sold an idea of what it looks like from being sold the constantly receiving thousands of messages about what health and wellness looks like. And when you peel back the layers health and wellness is really something that is so much more broad than just the weight on the scale and your physical appearance so you know when I started Robbie Detox. It began as an interview series where we asked women to take off their makeup to stand before a camera and have their photo taken without photoshop or filters and and we had a conversation about what it means to be a woman and what their health routine looks like and what their mental health struggles were and one of the things they found. Is that often the people who had the most quote unquote perfect bodies weren't necessarily the most healthy all around and so on the page? We we showcase all different types of body. We celebrate things like cellulite. And Tommy Roles and and then we also celebrate those women who are running triathlons and superfit and the Mamas and all of the different stages of what a woman's body looks like And we're really you know at this stage in the game. Mike goal is for women to really redefine what healthy looks like for themselves and for their body. Yeah absolutely and I know you've been really open as you said earlier about your relationship with food through the years how you've grown in how food can actually affect your mental health. So obviously a lot of people are you know having their memes joking at home about being stuck inside and snacking all day and all the weight gain and talking about that but Relationship with food is is going to look different when our life has drastically changed. So how do you had? We maintain a healthy relationship with food during all of this all these crazy times. We're going through right now. I I mean I find myself as everyone does the board eating or the like not listening to your body just doing something because you're like I'm feeling depressed today in New Jersey food. How how do we maintain a healthy relationship during? It's such a good question. And so many people are trying to navigate this right now because we are innocent area where we're being triggered to eat from so many different things whether it's boarded them Insecurity a changing landscape increased feelings of anxiety. Were at home which can be a triggering place for people at times and so a lot of people are finding themselves in the kitchen often or reaching for food more than they would and also craving things like those simple carbohydrates and sugar. And what can happen? Is We start off joking about this and and making fun of it which is totally fine. Like it's it's good in some ways to to laugh about some serious situations but what I find with. Women is because our relationship with food is so complicated that while this may last for a couple of days of more eating that often on the other side of it are a lot of feelings of shame. Discomfort feeling like you're GONNA become out of control and then because of that recycle into a mindset of restricting so then we're like okay starting on Monday. I am not having any of the suit on my house. I'm only eating. You know veggies and steamed chicken or whatever it is and then we restrict and then we know whenever were in a place of restricting. It's having a slingshot and pulling back the band of the slingshot restricting restricting restricting. And almost always we're GONNA go flying off in the other direction and end up eating all the things so we end up in this really uncomfortable cycle. That's not only impacting our physical health but it's really impacting our mental health. Our confidence in ourselves. We start questioning our ability and our habit. The comparison game strikes up so what starts as something really simple. I find for a lot of women can become a really toxic relationship with food. And we're in this scenario right now where we're all at home. Were all a little bit stressed. And it's very natural normal in that situation to reach for foods that are going to give us that adrenaline rush. That are gonNA feel good. That are GONNA like taste. Yami when you think about what's happening from a chemical reaction in your body. When you're stressed you're sympathetic. Nervous system is turning on. Cortisol is coming through your body And oftentimes in that space. Our mind is no longer also really logically thinking. We're not consciously making choices about what we're putting in our body or how removing our body or what we're doing To FIGHT STRESS INSTEAD. We're in this fight or flight mode and we're in fighter flight mode. We're thinking we're not really thinking we're reacting and we're trying to do something in that moment that's going to help us balance out our body that can help balance out those stress. Hormones are flowing through our body and one of the fastest sort of most eloquent ways that we can do. This is by grabbing some sugary yummy foods. Because that's going to release some of the more common hormones going to get a little boost a little bit of on those feel good hormones in our body balancing out the stress so it's actually really functional strategy. It's just a short term strategy run in the long term. Were actually not going to feel as good. And we're also not actually addressing the underlying problem which is distress or the anxiety or discomfort or the boredom that were feeling I totally agree ads. Like and and how do we change? That is the question like I don't I don't I find myself doing. I'm an do it with wine. I do it with food. I go the opposite way where I'm not eating because I'm stressed like it's there's so many different ways to look at it and it's everything you said is so right and it's like okay. Well now what totally like? The most annoying thing is when you can logically understand what you're doing you're like no. I'm not hungry right now but I'm still eating the whole bag of chips. Ym I doing this. It's so frustrating. It is frustrating so one of the first things that we can do is simply ask ourselves. Am I hungry? Am I hungry so for your writing this down right that one sentence one question down right now at my hungry and what you can do is start to identify whether or not you're actually physically hungry or whether you're emotionally hungry? True hunger is always going to feel physical. It's always going to be a physical symptom like Tummy growling or your head. Might be getting eighty. You might find that you are getting hang ary You start to feel dizzy lightheaded. Or fatigues but it's a physical sign from your body. Emotional hunger is kind of what shows up when it's not any of those physical signs so say you're walking into the kitchen and you ask yourself am I. Ha- Hungary and notice. Yeah I haven't eaten for a few hours and my stomach is like getting a little rally or I'm starting to feel a little bit irritable. Then go nurse yourself give yourself some sued. That is going to fuel your body. If you find that you are not hungry and you're like I just finished in our. Why am I back you right now? Why am I going to grab the wine? Ym I did whatever it is. Ask yourself what am I hungry for? That can't be solved in the fridge. What am I hungry for? That can't be solved in the fridge. This is going to help you. Identify that route emotion. That's driving you to eat so that you can find alternative ways to address what it is. That is driving you to eat so if you come to terms with the fact that you are stressed you can create a list of things that will help combat that stress other than eating. So maybe you could phone of Friends. Go take a shower. Get outside for some fresh air. Talk to somebody that you trust that you know. has the ability to help. You feel more calm if you find that. You're bored and you're going to grab food or wine. Is there something that you can do other than eating? That will help fight that boredom again calling a friend's learning something new turning on and watching funny show. Oftentimes we get into these patterns or habits right like every night after dinner we have. That seem dessert or every day around. Three or four o'clock we find ourselves in the kitchen. So consider yourself almost like a record playing and when we have a habit it becomes really easy to just stay on that same track for the pattern to repeat. Repeat Repeat Repeat and so if we want to start breaking our habits we have to scratch in the record so that the needle can no longer continuously play and one of the easiest ways for us to make scratching. The record is to do something other than that action. Even if it's just for thirty seconds even if it's just for one minute and then you find yourself back in the kitchen the more you take a different opposing action the more scratches you're gonNA make in the record until one day you find that you're actually no longer trying to address that underlying symptom of stress or boredom or frustration or anger resentment or whatever is bubbling up for you sometimes even excitement. And you're actually you know really addressing that emotion with a tool that will help solve it rather than just cover it up. That's a good idea. Even you talked about that record that could be even the routine you get in as it could be a good one like. I gotTa Peleton bike and I've been getting on that every day and now. I crave doing that because I did it a few times and that can help to you not doing good things you can get in patterns of that too and I know you believe in treating yourself and we're not saying that like don't eat. That's a bad thing. We're saying listening to your body and nourishing. Obviously we're saying that. Let's take a quick break if you ever find yourself scrolling through social media or watching TV commercials. I'm sure like me. You have seen the countless health and wellness products. That promise to help you in so many different ways. There's so much out there. But why is it this hard just to take care of yourself? I absolutely love incorporating CBD into my everyday life because it helps me feel so much better without making those drastic changes in my lifestyle. But if we're being honest sometimes those CD droppers. Don't taste or feel like what you're looking for. So that's where caliber comes in. Caliber is a better way to consume. Cbd caliber believes. Everyone deserves a simple way to feel better unlike CBD oils calipers CBD powder is completely tasteless and mixes easily in my food or drink. Nowhere taste oily residue or mouth feel precisely twenty milligrams in each packet of calipers. 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So get twenty percents off your first order when you use Promo Code Vine at Tricolor per dot com slash fine. You could try caliber. Cbd Risk Free for thirty days. If you don't love it they'll give you a full refund. So that's try cala per dot com slash fine and don't forget Promo Code Vine with twenty percent off your first order. So what do you think the balance between treating yourself and being conscious of what you're eating like do you find it different now than the normal like what. What is that balance? Because I do think that we all need to treat ourselves a little bit during this time as well. And how do you do that balance? All this is such an important conversation. Not only in regards to food in regards to. Oh aspects of our life right now right. It's coming at things from a place of giving ourselves grace and having compassion for ourselves in a time when a lot of things are changing when things are feeling really uncomfortable. And I feel like there's so much social media right now about being more productive and writing your bug and getting bashed shape of your life and really using this time and maximizing this time but I've also read a lot of Of really compelling articles speaking about the fact that we are going through a trauma now and in time of trauma especially in the first couple of weeks all you need to be focused on is trying to get some sleep which is a struggle for a lot of people right now. Eating maybe moving your body a little bit and that's it. It is going back to the basics. Yeah my thought around the whole conversation about you know treating yourself with food versus nourishing and feeling yourself. I'm somebody who has what would be considered junk food of some sort every day right. I love having my handful of chips while Dinner or a little bit of ice cream after dinner I make chocolate chip cookies with my kids. And we all have one So I'm absolutely not about Having yourself but what a help my clients do is really learn to listen to their body and to tune into what your body really needs in a moment. Why you find as you learn to listen to your body is that it's actually not craving junk food all the time and that when we start to notice what happens when we're eating junk food or what I call low energy foods is that we feel tired or skin breaks out or for some of us we start to have more anxious thoughts and so as you start to notice when I eat this. The result is this and the resolve autism great. You're less inclined to go overboard in eating those things another thing. That's really helpful is to practice mindful eating which is something we have moved so far away from as we like eat in front of the TV and our on our phones scrolling as we eat a meal so one of the things that everyone can practice a little bit during this time is really as you're eating food rather than inhaling it we've all done right when you like eat cookies and you're like crap. I don't even know what those tasted like to notice. What are the flavors of the food? In eating was the texture of it. Actually put it down in between Bites We practice something not every day by any means but called a twenty minute meal so you set your timer and you actually try and make your meal last for twenty minutes which sounds like. Oh Yeah you sit down for dinner twenty minutes but we inhale like I was just having lunch with Jason and I always remember this because of our conversations but same thing he was eating the sandwich and he just inhales it and he's like Gosh. I don't want it to be done. I'm like I enjoyed it so much. I don't like you don't enjoy it you literally. You took it down as fast as he possibly. Could you were scrolling while you were doing it like this. I'm having this conversation with Aaron in like an hour because I always remember our conversations about mindful eating because it's made such a difference in my life just like saying what you say but twenty minutes is a long time. It's a really long time the first time I did this. I didn't tell my husband. I was just curious to know. It's something to judge yourself about. It's more just like becoming aware of how fast you eat and I made dinner. He had to helpings completely cleared his plate in three minutes. And some of you are thinking no way. There's no way I kid you not an. I bet a lot of you if you sat down. I know that there's some slow eaters listening to this right now. Who are like I absolutely not. I can guarantee that you could finish him yell in three minutes while you're scrolling your phone and have no idea what it is that you just ate. And here's the the challenge with the way that we're eating right now in order. There's a difference between feeling full and feeling satisfied. So there's a difference between feeling full and feel unsatisfied. Have you ever eaten a meal and being like still not satisfied? I STILL. I'm still craving something more or I feel like I need something else. And so the way in which we feel satisfied about a meal that we're having is a by addressing any cravings that were having so if you are craving something salty or sweet or crunchy or veggies or whatever it is we incorporate some of that into what it is that were eating And then to eat mindfully to use all of our senses and when we do that sends a signal to our body and our brain that we've eaten them. We've had a chance to enjoy our food and that we are satisfied by our meal. If we're sitting there eating dinner scrolling our phone Your Body. There's no way you're gonNA feel as satisfied which is going to lead to you eating even more than your body needs. Because you're you're you're not satisfied right. Let's it's wild concept that you know that just by your mind being other places. You're not being mindful while you eat and you cannot be satisfied just from doing other things like it's just wild. What the brain is capable of? When it comes to these sort of little things that you would never think about unless we have these conversations you know people would never think about that. We'll be right back with more off the vine wraiths therapy listening to off the vine race therapy and not. Everyone has a troubling relationship with food. But you never know if the people around you might be struggling roommates during this time or you just you just never know and so what advice do you have for those who maybe? Maybe they're not struggling themselves but they could potentially no others who do yeah. I think that I mean anything right. Now whether it's your relationship with food or anxiety or maybe you have a family member or who struggled with depression in the past. It's always just opening up an asking. Somebody how are you doing? How are you feeling in this time? Depending on your relationship with them and how much you know about their history or not but I think that at the end of the day communication and connecting with one another is one of the most important of things that we can do. This is obviously such a challenging conversation For people to have with people that they love because they're requires vulnerability and it can be uncomfortable. But it's also one of the most important conversations that we can have yet because you don't you also don't want to bring up feelings for them of insecurities or make them feel like they're shame around what they're doing so it's it's hard to have that that language or no the right language to use with somebody that needs. That might need a little help. Yeah you know one thing that is hopeful in any type of conversation we're having with somebody is taking a bottom up approach versus a top down approach. So think about it. Think about if you were to go to Jason and ask him to do something for you and you're like I don't feel like you've been folding the laundry enough and carrying your weight around the House and I need you to start doing X. Y. Z. And data the Jason has shut off. His defense. Mechanisms have gone up. He was no longer listening to you. Receptive to the idea. That's a top down approach to communication. A bottom up approach would be you going to him and saying. Hey I've noticed. My anxiety has been like really heightened during this time and I went back to the drawing board. What do I need in order to support myself during this time? So I'm going to commit to doing more meditation and booked in a therapy session. I'm also finding when there's a ton of clutter that that's like super distracting for me so. I'm working hard doing that. Would it be possible for us to set up a schedule where you do the laundry twice a week? And maybe pat manage the bathrooms. Your central going to them asking for help while that's huge when you go to somebody and ask them for help. They're going to be so much more receptive to what you are saying. So if you're approaching somebody that you think might be struggling with food or your roommate A family member. And you're saying it's making me soup. Brian comfortable you know that seems like you aren't eating anymore. You're not coming out with us or you're never like open to having birthday cake at a party Immediately shut down feel ashamed to feel closed off whereas if you go to them and say I've been worried about you. You're one of my best friends and I care about you so deeply I wanna check in and just you know. See how you're doing and if there's anything that I can do to support you I've noticed that your not having cake as much at a birthday and it just makes me. It makes me worried that you're doing okay. Something like that is going to be a lot more reciprocated. Yeah I mean that's a good way to look at it. Where how you approach every kind of relationship you know. 'cause I think we all do that especially under stress right now. Where if we're feeling stressed or anxious and who isn't during this time. Your approach is so different with every kind of relationship. And that's something I think. Jason I both have been working on and conscious of because I when I'm when I'm anxious. I'm irritable and I've been you know the certain if I drink too much wine my hangovers anxiety and I have to really watch that because in this time you're like well. I might as well open up ball wine and you're like oh it's five and then by the time dinner rolls on your own number two and then so then the next day you know. You're you're you're anxious and you don't even realize sometimes how you're talking to your partner or yourself even or friends and and you do have to watch your approach to certain people when anxiety times are high. Alright everyone if you know me you know. I'm super into self care whether that's trying to stay active by writing my Peleton taking my dogs on the walk or just going about my day. That's why I'm really excited about this next sponsor because they helped me stay on top of my game super grapes. Soft choose from human super grape. 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Dot Com slash Bein. I wanted to talk about in this time the strings I how people can try and prevent their minds from going nonstop during this weird time. We're all living and what tools that you personally are using that you see success with in this time yeah. I'm so glad we're talking about this. I had not tell you how many people I mean. Obviously this is within the nature of the conversation that I have every day but how many people have reached out to me to say my anxieties at an all time high or I never understood what anxiety was until now I feel like you know it's hard to catch my breath or my thoughts. I CYCLING. We can all experience anxiety in a number of different ways so it feels different for everybody but this current unprecedented as we keep hearing scenario that we are in right now is causing so much anxiety and it makes sense when you look. I'm going to take you back. Biology Eleven or twelve right now per second so that you can understand a little bit more about how your autonomic nervous system works so that when I shared these tools that I've got for you today. You understand how they're working. I think when it comes to our body the more knowledge that we have the more empowered that we are to feel our best. So your autonomic nervous system is broken down into your sympathetic system and para sympathetic system. The sympathetic nervous system is incredibly important for normal normal functioning of her body. And it's what's known as our fight or flight response. It is vital that we have this system so I don't want you to get stressed about feeling stressed threat on when the sympathetic nervous system turns on we're going to see an increase in cortisol. Running through the body glucose is going to move to the muscles of our body. Our heart rate increases And we turn into that sort of fight or flight response where we're going to have survival based thinking might be breathing a little bit faster and really. This is a survival mechanism. It is created to be turned on in short bursts of time. You can go back to that analogy. That's always used about you. Know Lion being right in front of us in that situation. You're sympathetic nervous. System would turn on all of those functions that I just mentioned what happened and you would book it out of the yet to try and survive from this lion. The problem is that the nervous system isn't meant to be turned on for long periods of time and sometimes it can turn on not because there's immediate danger in front of us but because there's a perception of danger in front of us and so what we're seeing right now with all the media that we're getting all the stories about death from around the world we have way more news and way more fear based stories and information coming at us than any other time in history is that are sympathetic. Nervous system has turned on. And we're in fight or flight response which means were not necessarily thinking logically at the moment so all those people who are writing their book and putting their course out and doing all the things like. We're actually not in that com- space where we are rationally thinking about things when we would ideally be producing that kind of work are Paris empathetic nervous system which is our rest and digest response. When our heart rate has decreased? Our organs are functioning. Optimally are digestion is working well That's the space that we want operate. In most of the time so both systems are absolutely necessary for optimal health. We need both of them for us to function but right now for so. Many people are sympathetic. Nervous system is on full drive. And when it's on for an extended period of time we can start to notice things like an increasing Zayed's a decrease in sleep Cravings for food that we normally crave irritability weakening of our immune system and so many other things. So I wanted to share with you sort of. At tools to help you turn off that sympathetic nervous system and turn on your para sympathetic rest and digest response of an all of these are evidence based practices that we know work and there are things that you can do from home that you can start doing right now. They don't cost a million dollars So yeah I think like in this. In this time I feel like people are also making excuses And I have found myself doing the same thing like well. I can't go to this. I can't do that so I'm not GonNa do it where there's so many online tools and resources and like we're going to talk about in this podcast that you can do from home for free like so many things that were that. I'm excited that you're gonNA share some insight for that for us. Yeah it's really kind of cool time to obviously not for those who are on the front line working so hard right now and shout out to all those individuals thank you thank you thank you but if you are at home and you're working from home and you've cut down the commute time that you normally have had social time that you normally have than it is an opportunity for us to practice using these tools which ultimately will support you throughout your entire life. So I'm GonNa make sure that Caitlin has a pdf download of all these tools. But if you want to write them down as we're going along you're welcome to do that as well so you you have a pdf that I can share. I do okay amazing. Okay so the first tool that we can use. That is one hundred percent free and it is always with. You is connecting to your breath so as I mentioned when our fight or flight responses on that stress response on we start breathing more shallow. And sometimes we're holding our breaths and breathing quickly what we can do to turn our para sympathetic nervous system on is to mimic the breath of an individual. Who is calm so I do that? The dog thing. Pardon I do it with my dogs. You deal with your dogs. Do you remember this type of breath. I taught this you. I'm sure I'm sure remember. What is what is there a specific. It's called the five five seven breath. Yes yes because remember. I talked about how when growing up I had anxiety. Ocd about certain things. And I got so upset that my breath in was shorter than my breath out and I was like if you if someone could have just told me. That was normal. I would have saved me a lot of pain growing up because that was something. Ocd In me. That like really bothered me so yes. I remember this technique. Oh it's so easy to do and it's something you don't need to be sitting down and close your eyes for thirty minutes to do it you can be doing at while you're eating while you're watching a show while you're having an argument with your partner just a few moments and all you're GonNa do is breathe in for five hold for five and exhale for seven breath in for five hold for five and exhale for seven so the trick here is to along eight that sale and do it. Do we have time for me to show. Yeah please I love that. Yeah as you're listening right now just close your eyes and take an exhale and then breathe in for five four three two one hold for five four three two one exile for seven six five four three two one breathing in for five four three two one hold for five four three two one and xl for seven six five four. Three two one. An ideally you would repeat this up to ten times but sometimes even just doing a couple of breath that did wonders for me right now. I've been like short a little short of breath all day and I think that's from a bit of anxiety and that just helped me so much right there. Good good and if you find that you're a little bit anxious breath feels a bit tight. You can change this two four six so you can have a break then for four hold for four and breathe out for six just as long as exiles along gated and this is something you can do it any time. It's crazy how. It's something that we do everyday all day without even realizing it and how much it can actually help our bodies. I remember going to this girl. Her name's Dr Melissa in Nashville Nashville Brain and body and I had like a rib that was sore in my back with sword and she has adjustments and she just made me breathe into that one area of pain and just breathing helped me. And I'll look what the hell it's crazy are. Breath is magic so just tuning into your breath in that little way. Don't completely believe what you just said. Because I've seen really amazing things remit so if there's anything that you take from this podcast I would say carry the five five seven breath with you because you can do it anytime anywhere. That's a good tattoo. Five seven Oh my God I have been trying to figure out what my first tattoo should be forever is. Maybe that's what it needs to be. That is perfect for you. You have to do that. Oh my gosh. Let's PERV. Egged you just nailed it okay. Great we can pause this show actually no tattoo. Artists are available right now. I don't think so. 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Nationwide so for a full list of retailers visit Lacroix Water Dot Com and for more information joined the Lacroix community on social at Lacroix water. Okay so the second tool is practicing. Mindfulness so again. This is something that you can do any time. One of the most anxiety provoking things that we do is obsess about what is going to happen in the future. We spent so much time future engaging trying to problem solve about what's happening in the future and obviously we need to do sometimes but the majority of our thinking is In the future we're never living in the present moment and really the present moment is all that we have because we cannot determine with certainty. What is going to happen even five minutes from now so to practice. Mindfulness all you need to do in any given moment is to connect to your five senses. What do you see right now? Look around as we're doing this right now wherever you are. What do you see right now? What do you smell? What can you taste in your mouth? What can you hear around you? And what can you feel? Can you feel your bum in the chair? Can you feel your feet? Walking on the pavement. Are Your shoes tight right now? Are Your pants tight right now? Are you feeling a little bit tired? Do you see the light in the room. I love doing mindfulness exercises during my bedtime routine. Especially when I'm washing my face and brushing my teeth two of the most mundane tasks you could ever do. I can guarantee most people do that and they are thinking about what happened during the day or they're thinking about after your third doing tomorrow or how quickly they can get into bed. But I would encourage you when you're getting ready for bed tonight to really be in the present moment. I want you to feel the temperature of the water. Get a face cloth and let the water run over the face cloth and feel the steam coming up over your face. Notice what your face wash feels like against your skin. The SAMALABHA is it. Smooth is Foamy bobbly. Feel the warm face cloth on your face and let it soothe. You do some five five seven breathing. Maybe put on a diffuser or like some calming music tune in to forget everything that happened during the day and everything you've read and everything that could possibly happen and just come back to the present moment and be really mindful. I think people forget. Just how simple that can. I know it's hard but you know like how the simple steps because everyone wants to know. How do I do that? And it's as simple as the pay attention to your senses and things that are happening in that moment and people always want okay. Well how do I do it like? That's literally how it's so easy but so hard because we are so used to living in our minds and living somewhere completely different than where we are. You can use this when you're eating when you're driving in the car when you are having sex when you are making your bed in the morning. There's so many everyday tasks that we do that we aren't even doing. We're not even there mentally and so one of the ways that we can com- our nervous system is by truly being in the present moment wherever we are. We'll be right back with more off the vine grapes therapy. This is house of Kim with Kim Zodiac excited. So thank you guys so much for tuning in this episode of House of Cam. We are number one right now. Just keep going and going and going and going my glass of wine at this point you guys. I don't know if that gave me a really bad headache all good. These shirts is subscribed to house. Kim Apple podcasts and podcasts one so you don't listen that don't be totally that's so funny. Whatever now back to the grave there you're gonNA like tip number three but I thought about it. I'm not gonNA like it. What is it? Don't drink wine while we already. We already talked about it a little bit so being conscious when you're feeling more anxiety out alcohol and coffee. Oh yeah two of my favorite things. But you're so right. Alcohol's a known depressant. It is unknown depressant and I find when I drink I get what I call the fear and I always just thought this was normal like drink and then everybody the next day. It's fear where you're like. The world is falling apart. How am I gonNA get through this next week? There's so many things that need to be doing. I shouldn't be hung over right now. Why do I feel this way? It's like my mind just starts thinning and really that is a sign that in a way it's poisoning your body terrible word but I hear you. I like my brain goes well. What about Tequila? That's an upper heidrick. Then go for the Tequila. What has with anything right whether it's food or anything that we do in life. It's all about moderation. I am not telling you that you need to put away your wine. I still enjoy wine. But I'm just mindful when I'm like feeling on the verge of a panic attack or when I noticed anxieties high or when we're going through a really stressful state. I no longer turn to alcohol to support me through that because I know that it's actually not going to help right so I'll call no longer becomes the solution. It is a short term solution. I was GONNA say that's another one of those short term solutions. Yeah it is. Yeah Yeah it is. It is short-term pleasure that can for some people not everyone result in a longer term pain and so sometimes we have to get used to choosing short term pain saying noted that thing in order to have a longer term pleasure. The two piece might need a whole another podcast episode on the two. Ps The to drive all of our habit loop so pain and pleasure so then the thing with coffee and again. This is very it. Depends on your individual body. There's no one-size-fits-all solution here. Some people drink coffee and they feel jittery. They feel more anxiety. And so if in this time and space you're already feeling anxious and coffee is elevating that really try and just reduce your caffeine. So I have earl grey tea in the morning on those days so that I'm still getting a little bit of caffeine but not nearly as much and I still get that like warm you drink. That's I think that's the the what I like the most about coffee anyways like I if somebody gave me DECAF. I'm not sure if I even know the difference. I dislike having that Warm Cup of something in the morning. Yes and there's so many options out there to replace both of these drinks even if it's just for short period of time that that's like ginger beer or pink lemonade or sparkling water with tons of lime or a virgin cocktail of any kind. Or if you're looking at caffeine A low caffeine T- peppermint tea a four sigmatic drink. I mean like the possibilities are endless. Once you start looking for the lines are open to that. Number four is being mindful of media consumption. So I don't know about you but I turned into a media fiend. When this all started happening I was like couldn't keep my eyes off my phone. I was checking every five seconds to see if more people were sick. Like was it across the border. Yeah what was going on? I was obsessed like my fight or flight system was on. I was not rationally thinking I was like. Tell me where dangerous. Yeah it just obviously stirs up so much more anxiety so really in this stage of the game. Maybe checking and reading the news once or twice a day some for some people less. I'm no some people it's required in your job in their most likely a lot of healthcare workers who are listening to this right now who are like. I have to know what's going on. And so of course. This is speaking more individuals who have the ability to choose what they're consuming And that's that goes across the board. That's news that's social media. It is a time when you need to become a more careful than ever before about what is coming into your phone and what you're choosing to. Yes absolutely that's GonNa say even for the healthcare workers who do need to or people who need to stay informed on everything going on in the media right now. It's watching what you're consuming on. Social Media. Yeah exactly and recognizing that our devices are designed to be addictive and so in some cases that really requires us to set up systems in place so that we can't be checking it all the time whether that's like putting it outside and your car for an hour or plugging it in night in the bathroom so that you're not scrolling until one am and then immediately checking your phone first thing than when you wake up. Instagram also. Has this cool new feature where you can set a reminder so it will let you know when you spent thirty minutes on the APP or four hours on the APP you just have to put your limited and it will just let you know sort of where you're at in regards to your social consumption. Yeah I do that mind on thirty minutes which I need to change because it just makes me feel like like like I met like a true addict like it's not even noon and it's like telling me and I'm like okay. Well they'll like there'd been a long time fall and like I forget that I just said that myself so I need to change that but yeah it is a good reminder though absolutely all right so you love the bachelor the Bachelorette and of course bachelor in Paradise Monday. The next bachelor chapter continues the Bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. Twenty single musicians will step inside the bachelor mansion to embark on an incredible journey to find love through the power of music. The harmony of the couples will be tested by their relationships and judged by some of the biggest names in music like Jason Mraz and catch up Toni. Braxton and jewel plus Bachelor Nation Fan Favorites Entertainment. Weekly says this new show has everything you know and love about the bachelor date. Cards rose ceremonies and Chris Harrison. Bustle calls it classic bachelor drama with Musical Twist and Glamour Declares. Listen to your heart is quite addictive. Which of these new bachelor hopefuls will make beautiful music together? Who will strike the right note? And who is there for the song reasons the bachelor presents? Listen to your heart all new Monday. Eight seven central on. Abc number five is to balance your blood sugar levels so when we think about blood sugar levels again. It's a chemical reaction that's happening in our body and a when our blood sugar levels increase and then decrease suddenly an increase decrease suddenly were riding on this roller coaster of chemical reactions happening in our body. So it can really help not only our physical wellbeing. Our mental wellbeing. Too Bat Allen's those out a little bit and some simple ways to do that to drink water easy consistently every couple of hours to add protein two meals and then the one. That's hard in this moment and that I want to stay again acknowledging that I know women already feel so guilty about this. Is Reducing High Sugar? Simple carb foods so like all the five candies and while the like cake and crackers and stuff like that. It's not about not having them but it's about balancing out with foods that are going to take our body longer to digest and it's recognizing that when we eat those foods it's not. It's not about our weight. It's not about gaining weight. It's about how you feel in your body and your your mental capacity to handle stress and so for me at again I said I eat those types of things a little bit every day otherwise I feel deprived and it feels restrictive So it's not about not having them but it's about recognizing that if we have tons of them. It's really doing yourself a disservice in so many more ways than just the weight of your body. Yes okay. So that's bouncing your blood sugar levels connecting with those that you love. So we're seeing quite a lot right now. Social distancing being changed physical distancing so still connecting with people over zoom. Making time for phone calls Going for a walk with somebody Maintaining that distance from them. But this is a big one in regards to having support for those of you who are struggling things diety or depression. Any of that stuff number seven is moving your body when we exercise our move our body. We're going to release more of those good hormones that helped balanced stress. But what I want you to to consider in this moment is whether you need high intensity workouts or whether you need something that is going to be calming and soothing for your body make yoga or the class or Melissa would. I'm loving her stuff right now. It's more pilates based is this. What is your name Melissa? Would Melissa would okay. And she has online programs. A lot of it is just using your body so you don't need to have a ton of equipment and it's really all those things Just mentioned yoga. The class by Taryn to me and Melissa Woods workouts don't require a lot of equipment as I said and and connect you back to your breath as well so when we're already feeling a lot of stress for some people a really hard workout will feel good. It will help you feel stronger. It will help you feel more balanced whereas for other people you might feel more depleted so again going back to your own body and recognizing what works for you. Yes because it can change every like for me. It changes daily. Sometimes I'll get on my bike and all be in the middle of such a hard class and I'm like this might mean not being able to catch my breath on top of already feeling. Short breath is not what I need right now. And that's I swear Peleton's should be paying me so much money. 'cause I can't stop talking about them but like they have different. They have different classes and different things where you can do yoga from the. Peleton like they have the screen. They've Yoga have meditations on there. And it's just like it that it can change every day. You don't need those high crazy workouts every day to feel good or stronger like sometimes you need a mental workout like meditation. Yes exactly and we've got it in our minds that a workout has to be sixty minutes and you'd better be sweating and like you better be sore the next day. I'd really like tank urged people to change their thoughts about that movement and exercise is about elevating your heart rate. And you can do that. Going for a walk. You can start moving your body ten minutes a day. Twenty minutes a day it's better than nothing And it will release support you in boosting your mood and reducing anxiety. The last one that I want to talk about is in probably traditionally included on this type of list. But I it's really important right now more so than ever before. If you start to notice that you are having problems sleeping that your anxiety is high. You cannot get it to turn off your thoughts are maybe a rational you have achieved in appetites And it's extended more than a couple of days going to really encourage you to talk to a doctor at this time and to have that medical support because were in a of time that is different than any other and I think that one area in health and wellness where we sometimes do ourselves a bit of a disservice is that we assume that by doing the tools that some professional tells us like the ones. I just suggested to you that we should be able to get ourselves out of a place of anxiety or we should be able to move ourselves beyond depression and I have personally found that in moments of my life. I was doing all of these things and I could not on my own. Get Myself Out of my space of panic attacks or depression or anxiety or when I had an eating disorder. It was the same thing. I needed medical intervention. I needed Western medicine in addition to all of these eastern based tools. And when I say I needed Western medicine I mean I needed medication so I am absolutely not by any means. Prescribing this to anybody right now saying that. It's the answer medication for anxiety or depression. You know is something that needs to be taught about thoughtfully. It's something to consider with your doctor. Only but I wanNA talk about it. Because there's still such a stigma around taking medication. And I think that in moments like this were much more vulnerable to mental health issues disorders suicide all of those types of things and it is not worth being tough girl like avoiding the medication. Not going that route like forcing yourself to meditate and do the gratitude all of this stuff when it gets past a certain point. Yeah that I mean I can relate to that and I think I think everyone knows because I've talked about it openly about being on medication for that is sometimes and that was me it was I could not control. My anxiety was stronger than me and I think you know. I tried the meditation and the Yoga and it was just at the end of the day. Sometimes it's science and it's that you're there's an imbalance there and it has changed my life being on medication and again like you said like we're not saying all you're struggling right. Now go get on some pills like it's obviously. It's not like that word just like you said trying to have the conversation around that like it's it's okay. If that's the route you need to take. Yeah you know two years ago. I had my daughter Brooklyn. I went right back to work because I love my work so much and was busy doing that. We had James was two and a half at the time. Life was really wild. I was loving it. I felt like unstoppable but I started to have some symptoms of anxiety. I started to notice a weakened immune system I got shingles kept getting the flu and he started to notice. My memory was not working in the same way but I had released this course and I was like I just WanNa get these amazing group of girls through this program but I crashed. I burned out in a major way. I ended up being diagnosed with postpartum anxiety and panic disorder. I started having the most severe panic attacks I would be dry. Heaving my whole body would be shaking. I was having a thought that I needed to leave my family and it happened over. The course of you know like I was getting the flu and colds and the shingles and all that stuff over the course of maybe six weeks but it went from feeling somewhat manageable to like overnight being something that was so extreme and even when I started having panic attacks. I refused the medication for at least three weeks. Because I wanted to try using my tools I wanted to move my body and and prove to myself that I could do it without medication because like so many people I had this idea in my head that if I took it I be weak and what I learned in that process is that really medication is just one more tool on this list of tools that I've given you. There isn't an eastern versus Western approach. When it comes to your healthcare. It's about using whatever tools you need in order to show up as your best self and really when we can really thrive is when both eastern and Western practices are used in conjunction with one another. Because I waited to take the medication it. It really truly took me over a year and a half to get even back to the foundation of where. I was before it was months of being stuck in bed with a toddler and a two year old and a newborn at home. I I just don't want that scenario for anybody and so I'm sharing this story now to to say I went on the medication. I'm still on it now. And the medication really allowed me to access all of these tools again that I'm talking about it has made me such a strong coach. It has allowed me to see both ends of the spectrum and I really want people to understand that. It doesn't make you weak. It is not a doesn't define your character who you are. It doesn't mean you have to be on it forever and it's really about everyone just feeling that they can access whatever tools and whatever is right for them in this moment. That's what I want. People to leave with today is perfect. The perfect thing for people to take away. I feel like you gave us so much in this podcast that I'm just so grateful for and I know so. Many people will because all those tools like I can't wait to go look at the PDF and practice them. Because sometimes you just need a little reminders of things you already know you know like and that's what it's really not and just hearing you say those things. I'm like you're so right. I'm I'm practicing some of them and I forgot some of them and I'm GonNa. I'm GONNA really put those to use during this time because like I said I need to remind myself of certain things especially with the wine is such a big part of my podcast or certain things that I do and I need to watch like okay. How many podcasts do you have going on tonight Caitlyn again? Just use that as an excuse. 'cause I really do. My anxiety does does come on strong after after a night of drinking wine and it's not about never having again or not enjoying it but it is just about knowing in this moment. What works best best for your body and then being being bold enough and courageous enough to actually do what you need? Yes exactly I mean. Yeah you're doing for your self and that's you know that should be your number one priority. Okay we all could use a little time to relax right now. Given everything that's going on even in our normal day to day life. It's important to take time to relax. And what is a better gift than the gift of relaxation so give the gift with Spa Finder? The world's best-selling spot gift card and the perfect gift for mother's Day Mums everywhere. Needs something to look forward to. Don't we all with SPA? Finder e Gift Card. You can almost instantly send a relaxing spot treatment straight to her inbox without ever leaving the house. Perfect for right now. The SPA finder network includes thousands of spas salons and fitness studios. All over the. Us was services like massages facials. Blowouts Manny Pettis. Even Yoga. Mom can choose the SPA and treatment. She likes best and this is amazing spider. Gift cards never expire and new spas are always being added all the time. So you can save your card for a special day. Even if you can't be there in person you can see gift thoughtfully with Spa Finder for your mom. Sister mother-in-law it's a no stress gift that everyone will love. I love giving gifts that are experiences versus just things and this is the perfect way to do that. Also you just know your mom or whoever you're getting to is going to love it because they can choose the spa and treatment. They prefer so. There's no worries that you're not giving them something they want. Go TO SPIDER DOT COM SLASH. Fine to say fifteen percent off gift cards of seventy five dollars or more or enter the Promo code vine at checkout that SPA finder dot com slash vine or Promo Code l-e-v-i-n to save fifteen percent off a gift. Your mom will love. Well thank you so so much for taking the time I mean. You're you've got all these things going on and you're a mom and in this time so thank you. It's such an important message and I love having you on all the time. Always welcome and next time. We'll talk about the two. Ps thank you so much for having me on. I just WANNA say for anybody who feels like they need additional support especially in regards to the emotional eating if you feel like you're stuck in that cycle of restricting or binge eating or constantly thinking about food please come on over follow us at rob beauty talks on. Instagram. Also have a podcast called Robbie. Choksi confined it anywhere. The PODCASTS ARE GONNA give Caitlyn another free guy with five steps to help you overcome emotional eating into end that battle with food in your body so we'll make sure that you have lots of tools leaving this episode to support you moving forward. That's incredible you are just. You're just a true gem. I absolutely adore you and everything that you deal. And you're just all everything you say is always so important without being over like it's not. I don't get overwhelmed listening to you. Talk about like everything people need to do to during you know some hard times. It's like all simple things that we can do. And you give us all the right tools and it's just comforting listening to talk about it so thank you so much and everybody. I always preach about raw beauty. So if you're not I hope everyone that's listening is already following. But if you're not go now and and thank you so much Erin I. Mr Facing was so nice of you to buy. Even if it's over skype okay gave I love you by Bristow? Your session is now ending. Thanks for listening to offer. Vine Grapes therapy tune into here. New mini-stove every Thursday and check out new full length episodes every touquet exclusively on podcast one dot com the podcast one. App and subscribe on Apple podcasts without TV.

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Grape Therapy: Vienna Pharaon

Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe

45:24 min | 8 months ago

Grape Therapy: Vienna Pharaon

"Thank you for listening to this. Podcast one production available on spotify apple. Podcasts podcast one dot com in anywhere else. You podcasts. This week scrape therapy is sponsored by. Listen to your heart the bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. A six episode events starts Monday April Thirteenth eight seven central on ABC GEICO GO TO GEICO DOT COM. And in fifteen minutes. You could be saving fifteen percent or more on car insurance extra money in your pocket. It just may be the most rewarding to do you do today and third love go third love dot com slash fine now to find your perfect fitting Bra and get fifteen percent off your first purchase. Podcast one presents off the vine grave. There Kaitlyn Bristowe. Answer your question skin. Drink to your confession and here you have to say about anything bachelor. Let's shake it up some more years. Caitlyn or welcome to group therapy. I'm your host Kaitlyn Bristowe and today I am podcasting with a licensed marriage and family therapist who I've had the pleasure speaking to on the pod before but of course we have so much more to dive into. She has her own. Practice called mindful marriage and family therapy where she treats individuals couples and families. She also runs retreats around the world. Leads relationship workshops in countless cities and is a go to source for advice for millennial mothers and so so much more. Please welcome back to the podcast Vienna Farren. Hi Hi how are you an crates? How're you you know what I am? Also you know. It always depends on the day to day. I'm feeling okay today. I'm feeling okay day-by-day. Today's an okay day. Okay so last time you're on the PODCAST. We spoke about a lot about boundaries which is a topic. I find super important to discuss an instance. It was around the holidays. We kinda talked a lot about setting boundaries with family but I wanted to talk about kind of setting boundaries of relationships. Because will this time. I'm in one. It was so funny because I literally said at the end of our last podcast. I hope I'm in a relationship next time we speak so I could dig more into relationships so here. We are areas selfish. We definitely need to do one with Jason Too. Because I would love to do like a couple of one. He was going to ask him to jump on today but he's got a few phone calls so he couldn't make it but just a couple of questions for you. What are some of the mistakes people make when getting into new relationship and setting boundaries? I mean I think probably in the beginning parts of relationships were were generally more week in our boundaries than we are rigid right. So you know when we talk about boundaries and maybe we talked about this on the Last podcast but you know therapists news. The terminology rigid porous and healthy. When we're talking about boundaries and and so I'd say generally in the beginning parts of relationships we are pretty porous Or or were we already have established healthy boundaries in motion. And so what that means is that the the openings are there we sort of do everything in our power to make sure that this relationship is going to last. We make sure that everything happens to be okay in the beginning of a relationship the things that we would ask for if we were further along we might ask for. We become very much in our heads about making sure that we're presenting ourselves in a way that the other person wants to be around and so a lot of times when we think about boundaries. If there's something that's being asked there's an agreement. There's an expectation. There's something that's being put out into the world that we often believe. The other person is in going to want to deal with and isn't going to want to be around us if we ask for something that we think is a little bit outside of There's like intro bubble of acceptable in the beginning of a relationship. So I do think that it. At the start point we are generally porous when it comes to honoring what it is that we need to make sure that we're not abandoning ourselves relationship. Yeah absolutely look what are some good questions to ask and boundaries to set up for yourself when you do head into a new relationship. I think it's what our work is to become observers of ourselves and to see when we are exiting ourselves in order to maintain a relationship and so I love this thought of like what am I trading right now in order to keep attachment in order to keep connection and when we can start to observe ourselves in that space like am. I saying. Something's okay when it's not really okay. Am I not saying something? A not okay when it is like how am I shutting down in my communication. We tend as human beings we tend to trade in our authenticity for connection right. It means that we stepped outside of what is honorable to us in order to a relationship in order to be quote unquote loved or chosen or wanted and so I think that that prompt is a really powerful line. It's like am I trading something right now in order to keep us but is there something that I'm muting within myself that I that I would actually want to say and when we when we can start to ask questions in dive in a little bit deeper? I think we'll get transparent with ourselves and hopefully we can be honest with ourselves and night Manipulative but if we are honest and transparent with ourselves. We're probably going to gain a little bit of clarity here and in knowing where it is headed. This part is really important. Obviously as a marriage and family therapist talk a lot about family systems and our origin stories. Right like how we learn how to interact with other people that is generated from growing up in a family system and so as children we are often trading authenticity for attachment. We just WANNA be loved. We just want to be chosen. We just WANNA be safe. We just WANNA be secure. But do I need to do in order to get that from you mom or you that or whomever and so a lot of times? That comes along in our romantic relationships. We are programmed and condition to abandon ourselves sometimes in order to have love or quote unquote love. What we think what we deem love to be Maybe that's attention. That's some form of affection. Maybe that's someone who just wants to see us. Yeah that's so true I I sometimes can can see like my childlike behavior coming through in relationships like totally totally based on how I used to deal with it like for in my family like growing up. And it's so interesting because I mean your your past in your family. It really influences the person who you are obviously and how you act and so if you're getting into a new relationship what are some of the things you should ask Or look out for us so that you can understand where the other person came from. Yeah you know. Obviously we're all like. When is it too soon to dive into some of these? I was GONNA ask that too. Yeah it's like maybe it's you're not doing a full deep dive on a first or second date but I do think we can generally feel into a person in see how open they are. You know people will talk to you a little bit about growing up. And you know their families systems or they'll be able to relate something or Show to you that they have in some form of awareness just in the way that they speak about other human beings you know how they speak about how they handle themselves you know their reactivity and and so I think we're paying attention. We can sense whether or not a person is willing to to go there and I think I think really. For quality relationships it requires self and relational awareness and as those questions at some point right. That doesn't have to be too far in by. I think if you have two people who are you know fairly self aware or at least willing to explore than. It's not out of the question to start asking some of those questions you know in the first few dates around like what was it like growing up or what. What is the dynamic like with your family now or in those types of things are not super intrusive by you will sense if a person you know closes down my family's perfect or like up. Yeah no like no big deal you just sort of moves on frenette quite quickly So it does take practice of going into that space. The more than we do it with ourselves. The more we will be able to recognize it in another person like the more that we pract if this process of going inwards with ourselves and becoming introspective and curious and challenging ourselves than the more. We're going to be able to sit out in someone else. I remember my process like when I was dating and like how obvious things became. When I start to have started to have more and more clarity on myself. I could see so quickly of person was blocked and shut off to it. I mean I'm a therapist too so I think I have a little bit of a advantage there but you know it's still like there's there is something that you will send them feel in pick up on in in that energy and so you know even just asking or sharing your own staff as opposed to necessarily asking right how somebody responds to us. Talking a little bit more personally about our lives will also also share a lot. I mean I. I am very open about my anxiety. I talk about a lot on my podcast or or just in general and I feel like it's inevitable that anxiety is going to affect a romantic relationship at some point all right we all know you love the bachelor the Bachelorette Ten of course bachelor in Paradise. Well Monday April thirteenth. The next bachelor chapter begins the premiere of the Bachelor presents. Listen to your heart. This new show has everything. You love about the Bachelor Romance Hot Tubs Chris. Harrison and of course drama drama drama but with musical strings attached twenty single musicians will step inside the bachelor mansion to embark on an incredible journey to find love through the power of music. The harmony of the couples will be tested by their relationships and judged by some of the biggest names in music like Jason Mraz and cash and Bachelor Nation Fan favorites. That could be me. Jason Leonard One of those episodes so look for us which of these new bachelor hopefuls will make beautiful music together who will strike the right note. And who is there for the song reasons the bachelor presents? Listen to your heart a six episode event starting on Monday April Thirteenth. Eight seven central on. Abc As wondering. What are some of the best ways to prevent anxiety from destroying a relationship? Now that I do that but like I think some people might and I have in the past to be honest with you or good ways. Just communicate with a partner who might not be familiar with what you're experiencing with anxiety wise. Because I know it's so hard to explain to people who don't suffer from. Yeah that's that's the whether it's anxiety whether it's depression whether it's any of our trauma or wounding like so anybody who's listening to this or you might. Maybe you don't identify with the anxiety but you might identify with something else. That is a part of your life as a part of your story. That feels really scary to bring forward in a relationship because we're not sure of how another person is going to be able to hear it receive it what they're gonNa do with it You know you're right. Caitlyn like when people haven't lived through something sometimes it really is hard to relate and so the first thing is making sure that the person you know. Brennan Brown always talks about within the context of vulnerability like that. Another person needs to have earned the right to hear your story right so it's not about just going to anybody to say like here's my anxiety or here's my promo or here. Here's the stuff. Take it hold it be with it and do something really good with with me please. Related people have to be invested in. We have to trust them. And so sometimes we share it a little bit in. We put it out there. A little bit to see how a person does with it and receives it and then we can take a little bit further it is really scary especially when people respond with insensitivity and judgment or a mock it and but when generally when we're in loving relationships a partner is going to be able to set and so we have to be in the driver's seat of that you know you you've lived with your anxiety and you have an intimate relationship with it and you know probably when it pops up and what it does to your physical body and what happens in some of the things that you need in order to restore balance and grounded. Nece for yourself. If you've lived with it for a long time you do probably have tools and techniques and things that you do to to be with it and to observe it and so things sometimes. It's about this. You know we call it. Psycho education were educating a partner. About what it's like to be inside our body what it's like to be with the experience that has been held by us right so again whether it's anxiety or a trauma that we're trying to integrate into our lives. Our job is to try to communicate it so that the other person can get an idea of what it's like to be in our world from my perspective right. Both emotionally physically spiritually. Whatever it is that works for you at this is this is my experience of it and so here are some of the things that that helped me when. I'm in this space. Here's here's what help me. Here's what helps me from the perspective of partner. If I'm feeling anxious some of the things that I might need from U R X Y and Z are like so. I don't know if you know you've had that conversation with Jason. Wear like hey when I'm having you know a when I'm feeling anxious or I don't know if you have panic attacks but if I'm having a panic attack right like here's what's happening in. Here's what really a soothing from your. Here's something that you can do. I like a lot of times. We stay silent in base or we have these we call them. Covert expectations this expectation. That somebody's GONNA show up in a certain way but we haven't communicated to them we haven't we haven't taught them we haven't designed this. Co created this with them in a way for us to like truly show up in that space well together and so if I say hey this is the thing that really works for me. Can we try this or let me guide you in that moment to tell you this feels good? This doesn't feel good. I like this. I really hate that. We're going to find a way to be able to manage process some of these things that spike for us at any given time yet because otherwise. How would they know? I remember having a conversation with Jason where I it was the middle of the night and I was about to. I was on the verge of having a full blown panic attack and I I was like up and down and laying on the floor and then train you putting my legs up trying to lay on a cold floor. And he's like are you okay and I'm like no I'm not right now and like what I need is. You did not acknowledge me at all. Like I don't want to be acknowledged because then it like makes me more aware of of how bad this is like. I like it scared him. Probably because I was clearly not doing well but like for me personally I need to just have you not even acknowledged. Pretend like you're not even in the room or like creates more panic for me poorly such great directive and sometimes. We don't know that until we have that moment for the first time right and listened that might change in three months from now. You know like I think. Part of this is recognizing that there is fluidity. Sometimes it works sometimes something and we can adjust accordingly. But for now what you do know is. I don't want anybody around. I don't want anybody to touch me. I want you to see me that contributes to the panic and what's going on internally for me and so you know talking about it outside of the moment is important because sometimes when we're in it a person's like okay. I hear that you want me to leave. But you really don't let your okay and I'm ray afraid of leaving you right and all of those things and you know so i. I often tell people that. We're observing these moments whether it's a conflict or there's something that's emerging for me internally or we're talking about trauma or whatever. It might eat that we try to do it outside of the moment a and and that we have some type of very loosely rate some type of plan though that says like this is what it could look like and this is what I know about it and this is what I probably will need from you and just trust me in that space even if I look like I'm not doing okay. Right exactly we'll be right back with more divine great therapy from the network that brought you the cold case files. Podcast comes. I survived the classic stories. You know with new interviews. Updating each woman story with everything that happens after survival I divide because I convinced him that I was a person I survived because I was a smarter person than my assailant. I survived because I believe God saved me. Surviving is just the beginning of their story. Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts. You're listening the off the vine race therapy. Obviously we all know that communication is everything in a relationship. Is there such a thing as over communicating? Sir Yeah Yeah I mean listen I you know there's a nuance to it right. So a lot of times I'd actually tell couples to over communicate certain things and become the narrators of their internal world right so if we're in conflict and navy we know the conflict. It's a conflict that we have over and over again even if the the content changes You know so. We're in conflict and we're trying to move ourselves out of this pattern that we're in right. I'll I'll encourage couples to truly narrate individual experience of like this internal world of so what I'm feeling inside of me right now is defensiveness and I really WanNa shut down what. I'm feeling inside of me. Right now is that. I want to prove my point and I wanNA take you down. You know like you start to over communicate the things are going on because they become these openings and they become these openings in this process. That's going on. That gives so much more information. Oh so that's what's happening in your inner world. Oh so that's what's happening in your world and from there we can often bill again. Takes a ton of practice I am not suggesting that if you narrate your inner world you're GonNa move through all your conflicts successfully now but when you begin to over communicate some of those things it can be I opening and there can be an awakening to what's actually happening for your partner. Now when can it be too much like if keep explaining the same thing over and over and over again if you need to keep proving your point over and over and over again and these things that are not landing at some point we have to recognize that the way in which were communicating is not work? You know it's it's not actually landing and so if we over communicate something and we're doing it from a space for the communication isn't working then then yes that is going to be problematic. It's oftentimes GONNA lead to disconnection You know if you have a partner who may be present says avoidance or doesn't know how it doesn't have an origin story or a framework of communication like. Maybe they grew up in a family system. Where communication wasn't maybe. They grew up in a family system. Where being in sitting with emotion wasn't a priority wasn't modeled and then we're asking them to do that. And then we keep over asking it over and over and over again you know we're gonNA start pushing further and further away Without some type of framework that concede the system or the system. Being you and the other person in this example The system sort of like operating in the way that it is you know. Sometimes we need a third person to to step in and no point out what we're doing yes. I am a big believer in that. I love going to therapy. I I Made Jason. Come with me the other day to my therapist and in Nashville and we loved it and we like we went in in a good place. We weren't going because we're like. Oh Gosh we need to be good for anyone to obviously go and we absolutely loved it. Came out of there just feeling so much more connected because even if you're if even if you don't realize you're doing something wrong and just having that third person who's obviously a professional being able to talk you through things and like dig into the Y. Alright do you own or rent your own home? Sure you do and I bet it can be a lot of work. You know what's really easy? Bundling policies with GEICO GEICO makes it easy to bundle your homeowner's or renter's insurance along with your auto policy and it's a good thing too because you already have so much to do around your home go to Geico Dot Com. Get a quote and see how much you could save. It's gyco easy visit. Geico DOT COM. Today that's GEICO DOT Com Order. Some steps you think people can just take in general to have a healthier relationship with themselves and their partners obviously has a nervous. I true I do believe in it. Especially when you find someone who clicks with you have somebody who's also observing you fall but you're right there are plenty of constraints around it and the and the truth is like we are our own self yours. I truly believe in that and we are able to do so much of this with out. you know without that third party present in so in when we start to journal when we wake up you know a lot of therapists and coaches talk a lot about this practice of becoming conscious waking up becoming self aware going into the depths of our own world. We know ourselves the best. And when we take that seriously whether it's through journaling or reflection or journaling on prompts that people provide we can get really clearer on ourselves and we can start to wake up in a very different way so like some of the things that I generally offer. People is becoming aware of our belief systems are conditioning in our programming. I am deeply rooted in understanding the family in which we came from like. That's me is I. Don't I can't do therapy without standing? Where a person has come from. Its blinders are on nothing you know like you know dot to connect are in so when we I to me. Understanding our family system is one of the most important things that we can do understanding the role that we had with family system understanding the downloads. That we is we observed and experienced things in in our families. That is where we were taught how to be about everything that is what we observed in of chorus media and all coaches and teachers like there are plenty of people or collectives right community religions or rowdy all these things that inform us and we take it but as kids we take it in we absorb it were not filtration systems has children or we're not like four years old sort of observant. Our Parents Mike. I don't think I like the way that you just you know. We might have an intuitive hit on something that we don't know how to challenge it as kids and so as adults young adults I think that's the majority of your listener base that it's our job becomes our responsibility to begin to question the things that we originally absorbed the things that we said This is mine because Dad told me is you know like. Oh this is who I am. Because that's what somebody said. This is how I am supposed to act. Because that's how somebody told me to act that this is what it means to be successful because that's what somebody set like. All of these things are just thrown on us in so if you don't have access to therapy obviously we're a little bit locked down right now whether it's financial constraints whether it's geographical constraints whatever it might be you can absolutely begin to ask yourself like what are the explicit and implicit messages that. I received and go down the list of whether it's about gender whether it's about communication conflict sex intimacy education appearance religion on and on and on that list can really go and start to sell it. What did I observe? What did I see how did that? How did that become a belief system for me? What do I believe today? And is that actually my belief or is that a belief that I just took it from somebody else? Yeah I've had to do that a lot in my I mean I'm sure we all do but like so many times. I have even just told you about this. Last time was my first boyfriend of like three years in high school and just how he treated me and I still to this day. Believe that that's how somebody's GonNa treat me again. Even though I was however like fifteen years old at the time and and same thing with like having a divorced having divorced parents that you know somebody's just either GonNa fall out of love with me or they're gonNA treat me like crap and it's I've had to like really go through each will a relationship and learn so many things from that and but still I still to this day have dreams that Jason is treating me the same way and like doing the same things. And it's Jason but it's actually my ex from high school in my dream because that's how much that affected me at such a fragile age where that's what. I was believing relationships were right right. Yeah I mean we see how deeply impacted we can dean. And sometimes it's a moment. It doesn't even have to be like you know this. This thing that went on for decades. Sometimes it's the moment. Sometimes it's a month sometimes it's a year etc etc. I think when when trauma happens right like it is it's stored in a certain way and we keep coming back to it over and over again and so our work obviously is to process and grieve and heal so that we have a space to restore you know for me I. I don't know if I share this on the podcast last time but when my parents got separated when I was in first grade they went through a nine year divorce I'm an only child. I was a true sort of observer of all things and not having a sibling to download it with. Was that that to me. That's a big part of my story. I was just an observer and I was constantly witnessing my parents. Who were you know at that time? Were were incredibly hostile. And it was you know they. Each presented very differently from one another But it was chaotic and it was scary and it was. It did not feel safe and secure as a can and so one of the things that I did was I like. I just put my energy into becoming like really good at all my extracurriculars right so like I spent a lot of time. Energy there My core needs were all met but I never felt like there was room for me like any type of chaos or Manassra me so I became really good at everything and I didn't need anything from either one of side and that that trail came all the way through for for decades right was like I presented as an adult as needless woman talk about boundaries in the beginning of this this conversation like I didn't need anything from anyone. I was totally cool with anything because I felt like if there was any disruption that I would add that that would be too much for the system and it would would fall apart right my way of getting love and attention and affection and all the things that I needed was to not need. Anything was to be this like rate girl who was well rounded and you know did did the things well and that was it and so you know for me. Part of my healing and restoration work has been to be able to access my needs. I don't need it to be a needless woman anymore. And she fronted as like this awesome independent woman right like it's so funny. How like on so like this is so great. I'm so independent. But that was a that was a mask for me of like not knowing that it was okay and saved for me to actually have a need or say. I don't like something that doesn't work for me Entrusted another person wasn't going to either crash and burn themselves. I was GONNA cost to much chaos or that person wouldn't leave. Yeah that's that's so interesting we'll be right back with more off the vine rate therapy now back off the vice great that. They're looking at questions from the prime listeners. Because they do everybody seems to love this topic of boundaries. And and you know what you need and so many people just have the one recurring question that I'm looking at and everyone just wants to know how to say no like what you just said something about. How like It's okay to you know. Ask for certain things or say no or how I don't know why. But that is an ongoing question in this facebook group of how to say no because it's what am. I afraid of having happened if I do yes. Yes and that's the thing that I can't if we sat here and we practice like just say no like our systems are GonNa shut that down cool. I hear that intellectually right just say no boundaries are great. It's okay do the thing we hear all these things and we read all these quotes that we see all these memes and it all makes sense to us and head space but when it's embodied right in our emotional body our systems are like no-no. Don't you dare do that because if you do that. Then xs what's going to happen right? Ex- might be you're gonNA stop loving me. You're GONNA leave me. Maybe I'll be abandoned by you. You think that I'm amazing. Whatever whatever whatever. There's so many things that could be in that bucket that would be for the listener to ask themselves. What am I afraid of having happened if I say no. What am I afraid of having happened if I set this boundary because if you answer that question honestly it's going to be an Arrow that points you indirect due to exactly where you're healing work needs to be. Yes because you cannot override that right now right. I'M GONNA try. No you're not you're not gonNA try it if the risk is too much right if the threat is too big. You're not going to override. What your emotional body is saying. You won't be able to do it. The risk is not too big right so so an example of that would be that. You don't really like the person that much you ever notice how you're like I really good at setting boundaries with the people. I'm not interested in. Yes absolutely very good at it but when it comes to family and friends no way or like the person you're dating in you really want them to choose you. We're like we're boundary bad asses when it we don't care about the people and so so that's not your That's not what we're we're going. We're going off of the the ones where it feels like a threat to you right like where it feels like oof. What am I gonNA lose here and whatever it is. That's there in the answer is where you need to spend time and understand that part. Where did that come from? What's my origin story about this? Where was the first time that I felt fat experienced that we? What's my story? What's my narrative around this? Why am I so afraid of it? How is it attached to my worth my ability to believe that? I am lovable and deserving Riley we need a jet into that story because otherwise we're not gonNA be able to override it just by intellectualize ing something right and on that same thing like I one of the questions in here from Jackie is how to stand up for yourself when when you do set those boundaries and then they give you a guilt trip manipulation don't but you know it's sometimes it's Sometimes it's intentional manipulation and other times people don't even realize what it is that they're doing right so a lot of times we're dealing with asleep people who are just responding from their conditioning and programming right and maybe it's what they saw somebody else do. Or maybe it's how they know to protect themselves by guilting another when we set boundaries there must be consequences consequences are the way that we uphold it. It's so when we set a boundary but then somebody gilts and then we're like offshoots. Okay okay okay. Then there isn't a consequence that happens there and so you know I know it's hard and it is confronting but this is the work of somebody guilt you. Our job is to name. That is literally like when I talked about narrating things before right. It's narrating that rate. So okay what just happened is ice. Tried to boundary with you and what you came back with. Was Trying to guilt me. I do not want to interact now again. That takes a tremendous amount of courage and bravery like that's hard because it's GonNa point the Arrow right back to but if I say that this person might leave me. This person might get angry. This person might not love me anymore. This person whatever and so this is like this loop we can get very stuck in if we do not begin to restore our sense of self our sense of worthiness our sense of trust in knowing that we are good enough and love like lovable enough in order to live in a way that is respectful and healthy an expansive because other times we will constantly abandon ourselves we will constantly trade authenticity right. What it is that I need to set right now. What it is that I need to keep right now. What it is. I need to say right now. We'll trade that in because we are too afraid of losing something. Let's take a quick second and you guys have heard me talking about my amazing bras. I was definitely talking about third love. I love this brand. You guys every bras made with the memory foam cups. No Slip STRAPS SMOOTH. Scratch Free Band with a printed label. There is nothing that annoys me more than a scratchy Bra with third love. I never have to worry about that. They're made of memory. 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It's it's this platform where like we were talking about before. Where people have the constraints to therapy like. This is a space where people can come and they can start to challenge explorer their programming conditioning and thought processes. And it's an. It's free yet. What is that quote? I always ask you this and I always forget about the about boundaries and the other person the only people who get upset when you set boundaries or those. Who benefited from you having done that sell? It's still good you know. It's the these conversations there you might be listening right now and things might be resonating and you may. WanNa put certain things into practice in what I'd offer right now is just gentleness and compassion. Because you've been doing something a certain way for a really long time and it doesn't just snap into place. We don't just shift just like that. It's not an overnight thing. This is a practice that we do daily. This is a an awakening. An awareness has to happen day in and day out and Sundays. We might be a little bit better and other days we might not be so great like I have plenty of terrible days where I am not able to practice a lot of the things that I that I know and as I just say that because I asked everybody to just bring some gentleness and compassion to the cells when you start to see how much of yourself you trade in four that connection or to just be chosen Sometimes I can feel really overwhelming and upsetting like Gosh like. I can't believe that I keep giving myself away like this and so gentle compassionate loving but also accountable responsible take ownership right because it's never too late to begin to reprogram and rewire are neuro. Plasticity is a beautiful thing and the ability for us to rewire this stuff and do it differently. But you're not going to be able to just think your way through a you might have to grief some stuff. You might have to understand something a little bit better before you can start to put some of these pieces supply. So that's my offering on the you know this this idea of what we're asking people to do right now because it is very hard work but it is for all of us and we all have the capacity to do it right. That's I mean somebody here was. Rachel asked this question. She said if you're working really hard to set boundaries with family. What do you do when your partner isn't ready to do that? For example it's Christmas Time. You're ready to set healthy boundaries about time with family but your partner still wants to make everybody happy how do you set boundaries with family yours in his if if he isn't there yet yeah then you set your own? You know it's like why you will not be able to control things outside of you and so even though you may come off as cold or people may have some things to say like be implementing boundaries for yourself is where it's at so if it means that your partner is wanting to be boundary less with his family than you might exit at a certain point by maybe you say like. Nive only got three hours me. And then if you're staying there maybe go for a walk or if you're visiting maybe leave a little bit early earlier. I know it can come across as rude sometimes. But there's again there's that risk of in order to take good care of myself and really honor. What is healthy for me I? There are certain things that I'm going to have to do that. People might misunderstand. And that's that's some of our eagle workers you know allowing other people to understand us and have the perception of us without us needing to protect that perception. Yes absolutely and I know you. You have a session soon so we won't keep you for too much longer. But I just wanted to. You do sessions over skype and suffering well so normally in Kirsan You know were right now. We're recording during corona virus. I've I've moved everything to virtual. So yes I'm in New York City so I I with people who are based in the state of New York And then you know. I know you mentioned earlier that I do lots of retreats your like a lot of in-person stuff that is obviously on pause right now by connor and I