29 Burst results for "Grindr"
TikTok reaches deal that would give Oracle oversight of U.S. operations
"And Tick Tock recently made headlines Everywhere when Resin Donald Trump signed an executive order. That would essentially ban the Chinese owned APP in the US for national security reasons. Unless it sells its operations here to an American company. And of course, if that were to happen. We would have nowhere to go to see a million potatoes singing. To Adele. And that would be a national tragedy. This week deal actually emerged between TIKTOK and American company Oracle but some people like Zachary say trump's tiktok policy effectively changes. Nothing. The argument goes like this. It will do little to protect Americans data from the Chinese government because there are still plenty of other ways China could get that data that this move is just a new kind of security theater basically. The hard work of data security according to this actually lies elsewhere. So, Zachary TIKTOK has been banned in Indiana a few other countries, but it's still pretty popular for now it's the most popular video sharing app i. can see why it seems like fun and there are mental creative. They're short I mean the whole nature of the medium has their time limited. What happened with Tiktok this week what happened this week? Should be clear but isn't. Basically, in August, the trump administration ordered via executive order whose legality remains highly questionable that the Chinese owner of Tiktok, a company called Bite Dance. Divest itself of Owning Tiktok within ninety days or face the prospect that tiktok would be shut down in the United States. I broke the deal I said you can't do business in the United States, which is at least potentially within the power of the US federal government based on national security concerns based on national security and the logistics are complicated that you probably could order apple and other people and servers that are hosting tiktok. that. They couldn't do it and it would defacto make it impossible for Tiktok to function. So that is what began a process where the owner of Tiktok, again, a Chinese company sought an alternative way to their cell, the US portion of Tiktok or what ended up happening major deals Rocking Wall Street this morning pushing futures higher. We find an American technology partner Oracle beat Microsoft and become the technology partner for TIC TACS US operations although will not. receive its coveted algorithm so that all took talks data would be kept in the United States on servers owned by an American company and not by Chinese company because the whole point of this was that all these people using Tiktok, these tens of millions, hundreds of millions that data was potentially vulnerable to being used and therefore misused by the Chinese government. How so So the fear was because technology companies in China by Chinese law are required if. By the Chinese government to turn over data relevant data that the Chinese government could tell the parent company of Tiktok, hand us all of your user data which user data of again tens of millions of Americans. and. Then China would have that data. So that was the concern right and and that's a legitimate fact the Chinese government could order that. The problem is, of course, one via our court system, an American court can order or prosecutor can subpoena data. From our companies. So it's not like what you and I do on Google or what we do on any technology provider is somehow. Unavailable. To government if government decides that it's in its interest to get it not to mention the the various many non-government actors, the vacuum, the stuff up and use it for their own purposes that is even more important I think probably more relevant to the China issue which is. Does it matter whether the data is in this case, potentially house by Oracle massive US hardware and software company versus being housed by servers in China. In terms of the ability of the Chinese government to obtain that data, it wanted to obtain it because not just third parties that hoover up data and use it in the whole buying selling and the data market, but just spying tools. Whether it's the NSA in the National Security Agency in the United States or various Israeli cybersecurity and or cyber spying companies or the Chinese government. Most of this data isn't that secure. Not. Like. Triple encrypted quantum encrypted defense department level communications. So likely true that if the Chinese government really wanted my teens Tiktok data, it doesn't really matter whether that data's House on servers in China owned by Chinese company or whether it was housed on American servers on buying American company. So I guess, then how do we get to this point? How did you know given what you just said why has this become such a big issue? How did it start? Yeah it's a good question I I'm not sure. There's a precise answer. It's part of a whole continuum of the trump administration in particular identifying China as a proximate threat to the United States and a whole series of ways competitively in terms of trade practices hence the hundreds of billions of dollars of Chinese imported goods that have been subject to American tariffs. It's part of a multi year campaign against this massive Chinese telecom equipment company called Wa wa, which has been a leader in next generation five G. Telecom equipment in a way that again, some of the same concerns have existed which is. That the Chinese government would would use the production of that equipment as a way to spy on who met from purchase adequate. And Look a few years ago. There was a a forced sale of gay dating APP Grindr, which was also owned by a Chinese company, and so there was an earlier precedent of forcing a Chinese company to sell an American APP Social App. Because, of data concerns and finally, there's the fact that for years long predating the trump administration. China has not allowed American social media companies like facebook. To function in China. So there's the tit for tat. You know you don't let our social media functioning companies function there. Why should we let yours function here? There's Several year campaign against China which the trump administration's pursued but I think has a good deal of democratic support I. Mean if it's close to a bipartisan sentiment that China, China's a threat as anything we have right now. Why Tiktok? Suddenly became a thing I may partly have to do with the fact that it suddenly became a very big deal in the United States. I mean, this was not a company that had any footprint several years ago and suddenly as. The APP does your so it may have had to do with something that got really big and is very noticeable. Salsa not that economically important. So a lot of people would be royally pissed off Tiktok were banned. It's not like tiktok is. An integral component. To the US economy either during covid or without covid. So it's an easier target. We'll be right back. Everyone wants to become a better leader this groundbreaking new book how to lead shows you how David M Rubenstein is one of the visionary founders of the Carlisle Group and host of the David Rubenstein Show where he speaks to leaders from every walk of life about who they are, how they define success and what it means to lead. Jeff bezos Richard Branson Warren Buffett Bill Gates Ruth Bader Ginsburg Phil Knight Oprah all of them and more are featured in how to lead this essential leadership playbook illustrates the principles and guiding philosophies of the world's greatest game changers discover the expert secrets to being. Effective innovative leaders. Walter Isaacson proclaims reading this invaluable trove of advice from the greatest leaders of our time is like sitting in an armchair and listening to the masters reveal their secrets, pick up a copy of how to lead wisdom from the world's greatest CEOS founders and Game Changers Bhai David Rubenstein available in Hardcover e book or audio, and we're back I get the kind of general personal security aspect of it. Where does the national security aspect of it come in? Is it because there's concern about people who worked at the Defense Department or the military whoever having to talk in in use in their households or people in the Defense Department are not allowed to use tiktok certainly not on their phones. For before this although they may have teenagers who That's vulnerability as well. So it wasn't primarily about like US government employees who might have sensitive data that tiktok would be the back door way that the Chinese government would spy on them but it was generalized sense of any foreign government that is using private American citizen data potentially for nefarious purposes represents a national security threat. Now, it clearly has not represented the kind of national security threat in the estimation of the White House right now when it's Russian. Manipulation of social media accounts the same principle should or would apply right. If you'RE GONNA ban, Tiktok you'd probably want to take action against the a variety of Russian media enterprises that are attempting to manipulate and hoover up American user data. Some of that data's you mentioned earlier in terms of third party is available to anybody for a price just because there's a marketplace for data. Which I think either most of us aren't aware of or frankly most probably don't care if politicos data on this podcast gets sold to fourteen vendors so that it can sell you and me products based on our other computer activity most people. Either like that, or don't care about that. But the national security concern is simply because it's a foreign government that could potentially. Use, our search history or browsing history nefarious. And again a, that might be true but be it's likely that all this kind of data is obtainable irrespective of whether or not a company called TIKTOK. Happens to have access to a lot of it. It's really interesting. So into this whole story comes oracle, you know huge hardware software firm but how did they get involved here? Yes. Oracle is is a multibillion dollar firm that has had the same public profile as Microsoft or Amazon or facebook or apple because most of its business is to other large companies, you know you and I don't tend to go out and buy Oracle piece of hardware because we don't need a hundred and fifty thousand dollars server or. Network system for our employees. They're largely corporate provider throw a huge provider to the Defense Department in terms of cheer equipment and material, and they're huge software company. They're one of the early Silicon Valley success stories and the billionaire founder Larry Ellison has been probably more conservative than not I don't know that I buy into the whole. This is a reward versus. A snub to the other potential main acquirer or partner for Tiktok, which was rumored to be Microsoft but this is an unusual. This doesn't usually fit oracle's business model. Well, that's that's interesting. So what is their interest in getting involved here perceived to be I'm not one hundred percent clear about that I mean look at could allow them to. Have a little bit more of a consumer facing brand. Again, I mean Oracle's. Primarily a software company primarily a database company. Maybe this could help them increase their databases. There's no way that this is a natural fit for goal. But at the same time north this a huge cost for Oracle, maybe it'll produce some American jobs. I mean. They're looking for growth just like everybody's looking for growth, and once you get to be the size of Oracle. Growth gets harder some of they're also looking for a DIFFERENT INDUSTRY TO BE President Chore? So. What exactly did they given? What did they get here that as of this conversation is not one hundred percent clear off so it was presented as or go by tiktok. That is not the case or at least it's not the case now and as possible. The deal will be scuttled or change given that all of this has to be approved by the government has to be approved by committee. Called Syfy S, which is the committee in charge of looking at global deals in terms of US national security, but it would seem that right now. The parent company of Tiktok saw own TIKTOK and get some of the economic benefits of TIKTOK. This Chinese company called by dance and that Oracle in turn will get a massive licensing deal to house Tiktok data and information on its own. Servers and using its own software. So the concern that the Chinese government would have access to that data would be allayed meeting under this agreement arrangement because the data would be managed by and it's housing would be arranged by a US company. The Chinese government could order by dance to turn over but by dance itself wouldn't actually have access to that data. It's interesting I mean based on what you said before it's they're they're they're moving this data from place a, it's not going to be in a different place and I guess the Chinese government will no longer have a key to the door. But as you said before there's many different ways that either the Chinese government or a lot of other. State or private actors can get hold on more or less any data they want to these days right? which kind of raises the question for point of all, this is ENA. It's certainly true. It would make it a little more challenging to get that data under that kind of arrangement. It seems like this a big fight over a big company. That's not actually really about. The literal subject of the conflict here. Yeah. It is totally fair to say that whatever the imbroglio about tiktok has very little to do with tiktok. And everything to do with US policy toward China. And the trump administration looking for some High profile optic to be able to say we're we're being tough on China and protecting American citizens. Again, the oddity of Tiktok is given that so many of its users or young adults. Who Don't vote although who would be? Extremely, Acetate it. If they woke up tomorrow and there's no TIKTOK meeting, it's probably not. The most popular move if what you're trying to do is gain support during a presidential election. So it's not entirely clear what constituency the served there wasn't like a huge congressional clamor for Oh my God. We're all big imperilled by these fifteen second videos. So where do you think things go from here in terms of into in terms of the real story behind all this in terms of the U., S., China relationship and the increasing in. them of that. So I think to some degree regardless of who wins the presidential election. there. Is a train that's left the proverbial station of increasing. Distrust and animosity between the United States and China. But within the context of an incredible amount of economic interdependence that you cannot just snap your fingers and several or at least not without massive massive harm to each part of that equation both the United States and China, and that's that's pretty unprecedented. Right? Right. That's like the Cold War analogy doesn't work because there was no economic relationship between the United States and the Soviet Union nineteen. Fifty S
Trump not ready to OK TikTok deal, admits US won't get cut
"Basically, in August, the trump administration ordered via executive order whose legality remains highly questionable that the Chinese owner of Tiktok, a company called Bite Dance. Divest itself of Owning Tiktok within ninety days or face the prospect that tiktok would be shut down in the United States. I broke the deal I said you can't do business in the United States, which is at least potentially within the power of the US federal government based on national security concerns based on national security and the logistics are complicated that you probably could order apple and other people and servers that are hosting tiktok. that. They couldn't do it and it would defacto make it impossible for Tiktok to function. So that is what began a process where the owner of Tiktok, again, a Chinese company sought an alternative way to their cell, the US portion of Tiktok or what ended up happening major deals Rocking Wall Street this morning pushing futures higher. We find an American technology partner Oracle beat Microsoft and become the technology partner for TIC TACS US operations although will not. receive its coveted algorithm so that all took talks data would be kept in the United States on servers owned by an American company and not by Chinese company because the whole point of this was that all these people using Tiktok, these tens of millions, hundreds of millions that data was potentially vulnerable to being used and therefore misused by the Chinese government. How so So the fear was because technology companies in China by Chinese law are required if. By the Chinese government to turn over data relevant data that the Chinese government could tell the parent company of Tiktok, hand us all of your user data which user data of again tens of millions of Americans. and. Then China would have that data. So that was the concern right and and that's a legitimate fact the Chinese government could order that. The problem is, of course, one via our court system, an American court can order or prosecutor can subpoena data. From our companies. So it's not like what you and I do on Google or what we do on any technology provider is somehow. Unavailable. To government if government decides that it's in its interest to get it not to mention the the various many non-government actors, the vacuum, the stuff up and use it for their own purposes that is even more important I think probably more relevant to the China issue which is. Does it matter whether the data is in this case, potentially house by Oracle massive US hardware and software company versus being housed by servers in China. In terms of the ability of the Chinese government to obtain that data, it wanted to obtain it because not just third parties that hoover up data and use it in the whole buying selling and the data market, but just spying tools. Whether it's the NSA in the National Security Agency in the United States or various Israeli cybersecurity and or cyber spying companies or the Chinese government. Most of this data isn't that secure. Not. Like. Triple encrypted quantum encrypted defense department level communications. So likely true that if the Chinese government really wanted my teens Tiktok data, it doesn't really matter whether that data's House on servers in China owned by Chinese company or whether it was housed on American servers on buying American company. So I guess, then how do we get to this point? How did you know given what you just said why has this become such a big issue? How did it start? Yeah it's a good question I I'm not sure. There's a precise answer. It's part of a whole continuum of the trump administration in particular identifying China as a proximate threat to the United States and a whole series of ways competitively in terms of trade practices hence the hundreds of billions of dollars of Chinese imported goods that have been subject to American tariffs. It's part of a multi year campaign against this massive Chinese telecom equipment company called Wa wa, which has been a leader in next generation five G. Telecom equipment in a way that again, some of the same concerns have existed which is. That the Chinese government would would use the production of that equipment as a way to spy on who met from purchase adequate. And Look a few years ago. There was a a forced sale of gay dating APP Grindr, which was also owned by a Chinese company, and so there was an earlier precedent of forcing a Chinese company to sell an American APP Social App. Because, of data concerns and finally, there's the fact that for years long predating the trump administration. China has not allowed American social media companies like facebook. To function in China. So there's the tit for tat. You know you don't let our social media functioning companies function there. Why should we let yours function here? There's Several year campaign against China which the trump administration's pursued but I think has a good deal of democratic support I. Mean if it's close to a bipartisan sentiment that China, China's a threat as anything we have right now. Why Tiktok? Suddenly became a thing I may partly have to do with the fact that it suddenly became a very big deal in the United States. I mean, this was not a company that had any footprint several years ago and suddenly as. The APP does your so it may have had to do with something that got really big and is very noticeable. Salsa not that economically important. So a lot of people would be royally pissed off Tiktok were banned. It's not like tiktok is. An integral component. To the US economy either during covid or without covid. So it's an easier target.
Grindr to remove ethnicity filter in support of Black Lives Matter
"The dating app Grindr says it's pulling their so called ethnicity filter they side support for the black lives matter movement and say they will continue to fight racism both through dialogue with the community and a zero tolerance policy grinder has come under fire for allowing users to filter for matches based on ethnicity as part of their paid extra
How Hola Papi's Advice Column Stared
"Or let me get either. It's good to talk to you in quarantine in quarantine here. We are so dude. I need to know a little bit about this. Okay how is it that you end up writing an advice column? Was this something that you dreamed of. It's completely by accident. The way it happened is I was a freelancer living in Brooklyn at the time working as a journalist for NBC News. And I was really struggling to make it as a writer you know. It doesn't pay a whole lot especially when you're just starting out and grinder of all places had just launched a new outlet and they were looking for columnists to rights new things. Get readers excited so I'm broke at the time and I'm like okay. I want to write something every single week so that I can make more checks basically nine. Oh wait a second. That is an equal. They may get on this kind of thing to do that. You're just like okay. I got I gotta get paid. Oh my God I love this okay and then what happened and then I was like okay but the problem is I can't think of a new thing to write about every single week. I don't trust myself to find a new subject. I don't WanNa think that hard. What do I do and then I was like wait. There's a kind of column out there where people bring the problem to you and they bring the subject to you. It's called an advice column and I was like cool. People write me letters. The gays never run out of drama. Always have something to write about. It will be fine and it originally started out as a spoof invest. I really thought I was going to be making a dear. Abby parody and I was like it's going to be really funny. It's going to be crazy blah blah blah blah blah named Ola puppy. Because that was something that guys on Grindr said to me a lot? Oh no seriously yes seriously. So like the second men would find out and realize that you're Latino they would suddenly start saying all poppy. Oh my gosh. That's what they would open with us. They would just be like all up happy. It's very common on Grindr. It's this very like fetish. Losing Weird thing to say but it all the time and I was like this is kind of funny this is the way to reclaim that title. Little Bit. I'm going to have people call me PAPI but it's to ask me for advice not nude pictures. This'll be fun. I can't wait and then a couple of weeks go by and I get
Davion Johnson, 20, Charged In String Of Dating App Robberies
"Season charges have been filed against a man accused of robbing people you met through the dating app Grindr here's WGN's gender sellable to coddle police say twenty year old Davy on Johnson had been charged with armed robbery and theft in connection with three attacks since November on victims he met through the dating app Grindr Johnson is just one suspect the arrest is apparently unrelated to another string of robberies tight to grinder or other dating apps police warned last week of at least five robberies in the downtown area that occurred in hotel rooms where the suspect robbed victims with a
Dating Danger: Man Using Dating App To Rob Victims With Stun Gun
"Chicago police are looking for a suspect who's using a dating app to lure victims to downtown hotel rooms and then rob them there but at least five robberies where the suspect goes to the room displays a stun gun and then forces the victim to hand over their belongings police say the gay dating app Grindr has been used in some of the
Study: Tinder, Grindr And Other Apps Share Sensitive Personal Data With Advertisers
"A flash some dating apps are accused of giving away very personal information to advertising tech companies in Europe they have tough privacy laws when it comes to apps sharing personal information so the Norwegian consumer council warns that apps like Grindr okay Cupid and tender may be breaking those laws by sending user data to one hundred thirty five different third party services the council says grinders send out information like users GPS location their age and gender I a C. which owns tender and okay Cupid says they only share data when it's deemed necessary to operate its platform the council's warning is gotten American civil rights groups like public citizen calling on Congress to investigate the apps named in that
Study reveals Tinder, Grindr, other dating apps share user data with brokers
"grindr" Discussed on Why'd You Push That Button?
"We are back and we spoke to a wide you push button listener named Nick who loves using SNAPCHAT TO SEND flirty. Some people are dating sites kind of require you to have a snapchat. I guess to verify yourself maybe because they don't let us the dating APP chat feature and I also use it because it's a good way to send thought he picks to a lot of people quickly the dating site he is specifically referencing here is a gay dating APP called Grinder and it is a very unique place. There's a lot of cat fishing that goes on there or maybe fishing with your own picks just just from like five years ago a lot of profiles. You'll actually see twenty five or under around the age in their profile will say like you know my snapchat. Whatever or sometimes it'll even say like I don't rematch on here snapshots? Whatever and it's like okay as everyone knows caitlyn? I use the dating apps where it's super comment and for people to put their instagram handle in their BIOS or link directly to it but instagram does not work for grinder so grinders definitely more but sketchy place. It's more of a less personal yeah no space than tinder so tinder. It's your name you know lists your job. Sometimes it lets you into college. Many people on Grindr don't even have pictures of their face and so I think it's a little bit lower stakes to reach out to me on snapchat of reaching out to me <music> on instagram where you can see all my friends unlike maybe my mom hearing about snapchat like in its infancy. It was like Oh yeah. That's just enough to send new snapchat is great for nudes mostly because people have set it aside as the news APP. There are people the text like slutty pictures too but like if I wanted to on snapchat like you are going to bed. I'm not going to open this in my work meeting. You know whereas if I texted to you you might be like <hes> I was in the elevator. You know my boxer that over my shoulder you know what I mean. Nick is actually bill a pretty the impressive community around sending his flirty picks because he used grinder for dates tumbler for friends and snapchat to keep in touch with both the great unifier their people that I've never met you know maybe we met on Tumbler or our twitter and we communicate if not every day for sure every week on snapchat by sending each other like a couple like you know in the morning here's my underwear or like I'm getting ready just getting out of the shower you know like sending some thought he picks back and forth. I'm like that's you know we've gone on for years that way. Also like it's efficient to sending twenty picks like enjoy different messages. I can just be like Boop boop boop here you go. I mean I can think of there's a guy that for four years probably probably two or three times a week. I'll get like a woke up like this. Mir southie like nude in the morning. You know like some conversations that go with it but then there are other people like it's like we just exchange photos. Nick lives in the Midwest Shutout Midwest. He's not part of the urban millennial coastal bubble and he says snapchat is a gay Internet essential no matter where you live I think it is a utility in my section of the Internet like Gay Internet still uses.
"grindr" Discussed on Conan Oâ€™Brien Needs A Friend
"And it wasn't even my team it was. It was insistent I had to get on Grindr at some dick, and then don't we? Then I had to go. It's a comedy bid. Konare. Yeah. And that got me into the grinder community, and it was you've always done terrific bits for us. And of course, everyone, I came to know you doing that fantastic segment that I love everybody loves Billy on the street. What I loved is that there's a lot of people that do pure energy in comedy, but don't have necessarily the comedic chops or the content. There are other people that have the content but don't have the manic energy. You're one of the few people that combined both, and it was fantastic. Yeah. And so I thought, oh, this guy is really funny on his feet and also fearless. And so, my first question was, I can do. Fearless things I think, but I'm always nervous just before. I do the specially when it involves people, I don't know. There's a little bit of shyness to overcome. And then once I overcome it. I can act like total fool were you ever. Afraid is there anything that you're overcoming to run up to people on the street and confront them like that ES, and I, I should say, just going back, you're the first major talk show to ever have me on. So thank you very much. Oh, it was against it was against my wishes. There was a quota Phil. Have a lot of power at Coney. Exactly. Someone to fill that void. Yes. So thank you for that. You've been so supportive, and those bits I did with you. I went to the Super Bowl. Yes. You when Madonna was the halftime show, that's still to this day. I think one of the best things I ever did. It was so great because you're such a Madonna fan. I really was from a very real and you don't like comedy, that's based on real, not fake. But real passion, enthusiasm, always works better. If a comedian goes to make fun of something. It often, I think falls flat. When someone goes when you went and you were you built, a religion around Madonna and you're going to see her at the Super Bowl. It was it made all the comedy that much better. Yeah. It did. And back to your question ES, especially when I first started doing the Billy on the street bits which, by the way, people don't realize I started doing them for my live show in New York, and I'm forty. So this was like back in. Two thousand four. Actually this summer is the fifteenth year. I've been shooting some version of a Billy on the street video, and I was making them for my live show, this before a couple years before YouTube, even came along. And so I- vividly, recall the first time I went to shoot them walking in Washington square park, and I had to circle the park multiple times in order to work up the nerve up to someone because I know this is like sounds like an annoying actor thing. But it really is. So out of my comfort zone. Yes to do this. Now I'm used to it. It's been fifteen years. I mean, you know, I got used to it somehow and still the mornings I wake up and half the shoot a Billy on the street segment. I'm I just wanted to be over. Well gonna just say something, I don't know if you can relate to this. But I've shot thousands and thousands and thousands of hours since nineteen Ninety-three out in the street around the world going up to. People, I don't know. And there's always a something in my mind that saying they hate you. They, they're going to say something to hurt you feelings. You're going to end it doesn't happen. But that's the fear and I don't know if people can relate to that, when they see these segments they just think oh, Billy Eichner. He's not worried about anything. But there's the is a little bit of fear..
"grindr" Discussed on The Read
"We may just read them aloud on the show, shutouts everybody who sent in the stories you have of white people in your lives who when confronted admitted that they also do not wash their entire bodies. Like to take this time to send a prayer to all of the bathtubs Jesus. Are owned by folks who have just begun to wash their legs? Yes. I know that those jobs are in black facing. Haven't they? We just ask that you cover them. Okay. In your blood. They more. They need it. We need it. Find a goes my word the sediment, okay? The Phil coming up these people's bodies by in your precious. Mighty name. Oh my. Happening. I know that scum. The bubbles that will have to scrub they way through the layers of mess. Y'all even them to vote was the bathroom clear. Call with little mascot that was like a little scroll Brandon battles. Unless I still use their shit. My whole damn bathroom down. Colest- tubs with struggling bubbles. Creatures bother. Right. Yes. So. Questions to ask the read at gmaiLcom our first question this week comes from cagey who says, I'm a twenty five year old woman with four children. I have one child with my boyfriend, five years, and we're also raising his daughter from a previous relationship we live together and split the bills, thirty five sixty five meaning he pays sixty five is she pays thirty five. He paid my way through nursing school insecure of all the bills, and holidays by himself. Those two years, he has been the help in push that I needed I have one half active baby daddy, who was an ATM until two thousand sixteen when he lost his mama, his mind and his money since then it's pretty much just been my boyfriend handling majority of the financial aspects of our five year old son recently, my baby. Daddy got into some shit and his face facing a lot of time in prison. It has taken a toll on me an expedited search for therapy. I have no, my baby daddy for over ten years, although our relationship did not work out. Still have love for him and remained close to his family, and we have many mutual friends. The problem comes in because my boyfriend sees mill reason for me to be upset about him going to prison. He tells me that shit, Don affect us and good thing you'll sung gotta stepdaddy. My boyfriend is emotionally incompetent and selfish. I am directly affected because my son is losing his father, who he loves dearly, despite his flaws and I'm further affected because I've known this person for half my life, and I know he does not deserve to be imprisoned. My sympathies. Tear me apart the seams and he constantly overlooks it and only about the trial or phone calls so that he can discuss it with his friends who are slightly familiar with my baby daddy to make matters worse. My boyfriend does not know about the money that I spent on phone calls and commissary to help make my baby daddy, as comfortable as possible in this fucked up situation. I truly believe my boyfriend would lose his mind if he knew though, I work daily as a nurse in only spend my own money. I know he would look at it as throwing money to a nigga Husan, son. He's raising I hate a lot of him or omit information. Should I tell him or should I treat it as? If it's none of his business, it's my money I'm spending is that deceitful since we're supposed to be on the team on just interrupt? And it seems like the one person that has always been on my side. Can't give me a hand or a listening ear. Thanks cagey. Well. Going on there line. This almost reminds me of the letter I feel like we read last week if not the week before with the. The girlfriend or fiancee? Whoever was that didn't appreciate. Homeboys like ExCo for God or. Yeah. And it being sort of like an insecurity thing to me. Yeah. Now here's the thing. I wouldn't be putting money on this Knicks books. Personally, I would not. But. You. You simply being emotional about it being concerned about it being sympathetic..
"grindr" Discussed on The Brain Candy Podcast
"Kenny, don't wait. Start properly hydrating today. And they're yummy. So there you go. Well, let me ask you about this, and it's totally crass, but I, I guess, I knew this. But not really, you know, like, I can't wait for what you're gonna say have like super excited terrified of this is one of those where I feel like I'm in trouble for something. And I shouldn't be you. That's like what we're talking about before of parenting, what that did today. No. This is about how, you know, how gay guys are on Grindr, and they, they match up in whatever it was definitely is not me. Yes. Got it. Well, you know, like, in the straight world, we will send pictures nudes and all that. And they send pictures of their behold. Okay. But I didn't really know about it. And I wanted to talk about it, and how I don't think I would ever wanna see somebody's be whole. Well, if that's not the area that you're, you know, okay, but Sarah's stop it. Yeah. What I'm trying to get is. Why would you want that even if you liked banging beholds yet, but have you ever talked to a gay guy who says is like repulsed by Jonah's Oh, yeah. There you go. Okay. What would used by the place that a penis goes in, in a straight relationship tore, and you're kind of not repulsed, but, like shocked that he has an admiration for the place? Goes end in a gay relationship. Yeah. But I'm just saying that are into the that represents, like it's like a visual men are very capable of where they get to put their you know what? You know, one, okay. But like, do you think that they're beholds that are better than others is kind of what I'm saying their qualifications for some, you know, who knows what color size? Maybe it's hair or no hair is not like there's probably different. Like, you know, look think about all of their time. No, I am totally like on the gay guy said with. Correct. Correct were just, yes, I'm not saying you aren't for somebody who has spent thousands of dollars and hours of time caring for the maintenance of her vagina young. Yeah. And like many women out there. It's not surprising that. Men would care for that area in their relationship. See what I mean, kind of. Yeah, but not really, because we can't pretend like poop doesn't come out of correct. But, you know, even if you also bang that way, which a lot of straight people do as well. Yes, they do. But, but I bet straight people who are into that would be this is what I wanna know yet. It has any straight guy ever said can I see a picture of your behold? No, not a picture of it, but I have definitely had them. Person in the moment. Yes, when you're there, correct, good point. I see okay? I'm making progress. 'cause maybe I'm sure some straight guys do as for pictures, your b- whole, but I don't think it's very common. But maybe that's like there's a few other steps before they get to, you know, it's like an ac- your boobs can see your, you know, yes. Okay. Yeah. Well, I saw on Twitter, someone was joking about how like a gay guy was joking about how like. Whenever they catfish. Like I think sometimes they even catfish with their holes believe that. And that made me think like is one inferior. Yeah. And if you think about how it like there's definitely vagina shame. We talk about that all the time. Sure. So I would imagine there's probably some be wholesome. Have you ever heard of a guy? Shaming woman's vagina. Yeah. Oh, yes. On the challenger just in, in both. I think I how confidence because of comments guys made what did they they're not about me? They're just like I remember China competent. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I'm trying to work on that. So I have memories of being in high school, I was on the swim team when I was in high school. And this team is co Ed, yeah, I remember a story about the guy's making fun of some girl, because they saw basically like discharge in her bathing suit..
"grindr" Discussed on Why Won't You Date Me?
"Net. Honestly, maybe I shouldn't talk about it. Because Kim someone get to MacLeod people excess the house how Jennifer Lawrence's shit. Golly. Oh, okay. Well, if you're listening to this, and you're like, I really wanna see it just come to one of my shows and asked to sing. Show it to you. And then it'll be like our private thing. You don't have to hack. My cloud. Do you wanna see my cloud just to see my cloud, hashtag don't hack, my cloud? I don't have any of my face in any of my pitchers mart. But, but you know, have any markings that could you know, I have no tattoos and no nothing. I just have my myself. The is. So that's why I feel safe there ever these guys on Grindr like fully showing their face in their whole body. I'm like, you can't just be doing this. You can't trust anyone. But people do it. They would just be running amok showing their dick with their face in it their whole body. It's wild what people will just send to people that. They don't really know. But I mean, I guess if you're just like if you're not in the public eye, then why not who cares? Yeah. I mean, I think it's a lot of accountants. A lot of accounts bending over spreading they're assholes mirror. The whole picks are crazy. I love a good whole pick. Do you get whole pick? Nobody has sent me a whole pick. Because straight men just send their Dixie of corn don't realize that there's a whole bunch of the body that I wanna see. Hole on the first with anybody. I always play with her. But just see what the temperature is. Right. Where the mic feel good and they go. No. Thank you. I go. All right. How much are you fucking? How much my fucking right now. Nothing nothing. All right because you're doing a couple months a couple months last year. I did pretty good last year at the end of the year. This bitch was cleaning it up. Do you make a list? Oh, I have a whole word document where I go in detail about the date in the encounter and the dick size rate them. I have a like a in my notes, I have a whole list, and then I looked at it for twenty eight and I was like, oh this long. It was more than the months of the year. We were young. I kind of consider it like a dry year. So okay, never mind. We were being a ho this year is I also like it up here. I love being then sometimes I'm also at a point where I'm like the first time you have sex with someone is so annoying because people come quickly, it's my favorite, actually, really. Yeah. Because discovering someone's body is like very hot to be an oftentimes they'll have an amazing time. The Merced MRs second time because I've already been there. I don't know. There's there's something to me about like, no matter who it is. The first time is always like love it. I I'm just right now. It's just like a lot of dudes come into quick, I have a friend who's having that problem. Sometimes they'll like be able to get it back up and fuck me again. But for the most part, it's like older men who are like, oh, I went on a date with a guy that I went home with him. And he was like we actually can't do anything because I came this morning. I was like you can't you can't come more than once in a day. Understand your twenty s is now the evening, maybe he gave up coming more than once for lent. I don't think that was it. He was like he was like this. This is lent. It is Matt what are you giving up for lent girl? What what have I not done that? I can say I'm giving up I'm giving up. Apparently, I'm giving up going to the gym for lent. I also have him into the gym in soon. Go I was doing so good earlier in the year. What are you giving? I'm gonna give up eating cold cheese. I also hate cold cheese. So like, it doesn't matter doesn't count, Nicole. Let's see. What can I give up? Okay. I give up a negative thoughts. Yes. And how do you do that? Well, -ly it's like mindful thinking may therapists.
"grindr" Discussed on Throwing Shade
"No. I think so. But I think probably it's an easy thing to do if you're a young single gay, man. I think that's probably for someone who wants to get you in trouble. Somehow. It's probably an easy thing to do is like, I don't know someone. I'm sure someone said like, well, he's probably on Grindr. He's probably on a hookup app or da da. This is awful thing to of like kind of my Grandpa's age way of thinking, which is like one time. He said like, oh, you Houston bus the gay bars downtown in LA like he'd be like, you know, what they were doing in. There is a role trying to like, you know, hook up, and I would go so different than straight bars in what way. Right. It would you know, if you if you leaked a nude of a woman, it might not I don't know, maybe it would be just as big of a deal, but. If it does feel like that mentality of like, well, how dare you express your sexuality? I think I exactly exactly. And I think just older people having a problem with it and not wanting him on city council and not wanting to be around. Yeah. Obviously, this isn't for sure that these people did it. But I he has one hundred hundred so I'm going with his hunch who who where was it leaked to the the paper. I think so. Yeah, I think just like exactly. And then he went he went on to say, I'm sorry. If anyone took the photos the wrong way, but it really is nothing more complex than it's my personal life. I don't see anything wrong with what I did. I don't think I should be judged for what happened. So one of these other council people Kyle Hollier who he who cross believes behind. It did tell the New York Times one thing you just said the voters of groves have spoken, and the mayor wouldn't even respond to the New York Times per their request. So I have a feeling they're just trying to back away from this. But I don't know how I hope you are put back on city council. It's where you wanna be. And by the way, groves sounds like a place you wanna live, and you should be able to do that. The solution should not be to move to somewhere else. I agreed to be like I like this town of fifteen thousand people I'm a human being. I miss citizen. I did not send photos to the paper or to anyone who didn't want them. The end the. The and..
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"Or when someone says, you know, you're gay, and that's your business. It's your straight. And it's my business all the time fucking times. Janka Chopra Nick Jonas their sexuality there. Relationship is my business. Fucking Brad Pitt whoever he's ever dated over the past twenty years has been my business down. So don't tell me that like you're supportive of me. But also, my businesses my business and it cetera. It's just like you have to understand the way these things are harmful. And so when we're on something like grinder, and this is why I'm also both ways on it verse. His that is because it's like, yeah, we're going to get ours. The way we can get ours. Because it's not. See a really important part. And I think there's a lot of aspects of grinder that are negative and even thinking about tender versus grinder in the way that it's designed like Tinder there is that mutual thing that has to happen. I like swipe right? Yeah. And that's gonna actually I'm sort of like sent. Yeah. Why would you like eliminating not is what creates more hate speech because that's they found. They literally studied tenders grind. There's so much more hate speech on Grindr. And they were trying to figure out the software, and they're like, it's because tender allows this thing at the beginning to be like, okay, there's a mutual attraction. Now, we can start whereas grinder there's this like literally anyone kindle pitcher. They're asshole people people can have their opinion on you, and they can be racist. And they like there are certain design flaws to it that I think could literally be fixed. I could make it a more positive thing for everyone. But you're right. I think gay sex is something that is always going to be one of the hardest things we have to deal with the way that it's thought of by the public by media people literally just think it's gross. And don't wanna talk about it. Yeah. Because it's Kohl's end up in these like, maybe what I think of literally grind rap as dark like these dark places to find sex. But I wish I didn't have to think of it that way. And so I think yeah. As much as like, maybe it can create so much negativity for us, and there's aspects of it that are problematic. They're still maybe as a necessity for it for us in order to have like safe free sex. Right. The and the well the idea that the idea that gay sex is something easy to just do and get is so false. I know it's so fall. So if people think that's the way that is just wrong or they just don't know enough about it, which is literally what like as ignorance is. What makes people not tolerance? So if you just people need to be educated, like even if someone was friends with a lot of gay guys over Hong period of time. That's right girl will likely know a lot more about anal sex and probably be less dope by and maybe even try exactly like everyone was about an option for everyone. And it feels good. I would say you have a perfectly good like clitoris. I would enjoy that. Yeah. But like also, you know, put on your, but yeah. No. There's lots of options. I've just like kind of jealous that you guys don't have to use your bottles because. Well, that's only twenty eight. When you were younger just can't sit on Dixie. I used to. Along. So no longer verse. But we're verse on this subject. Thank you so much for weighing in on this and being open and personnel and open. Find among grinder my God. No. If you honestly if you ever find me and you see my face gift. That's me again last call trees as make sure you're listening. We love the podcast. It's amazing. I feel like I'm like in the home of it right now, and you are honored and giddy and just thank you so much. Thank you for having me. This is fun post.
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"Like you seem to have a good week. And I also make if I if I message you you would send a face pick. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. I would lead as you gotta leave it the face. So the thing is like some people are just like just a torso. And then you talk to them like, right? You have in the past. And they're like, okay. Cool. So come over. And I'm like, I haven't seen as I wouldn't know what you looked. Yeah. And that's the part of what like are you insane. Like, I would much rather talk to a fish. And then they show the body because I do love to trade picks love trading. He's free. He's free. I guess I just yeah. I think grinder like I think there are positive aspects of it. I think without outed the gay community. Could like I don't know. Who knows it's such a huge. It's been such a huge impact on our ability to have sex. And I think that sex has been also really important like free in part of like being queer for a long time that it has created a weird like, I don't even know if it's good or bad thing. But I really feel like moving forward and like with grinder for the most part. I think it's it is dark like, I think it's an dark Pige. Don't think it's doing not much positive. But here's what I'd say. The the gay reality is also dark. Here's what it's and it's like, we're two gay men having this discussion. And here's what I'd say. The straight people who think that they can weigh in about their opinions on Grindr. You can't because I would say let our community have this discussion and figure it out like sometimes we'll talk straight women who were like a gay guys are so promiscuous grinder. I can't believe you guys just say what you want to do. And then you go fuck, you're so lucky, right? And it's like antiquated on both fronts because it's like women don't want to be slut shamed. But that's exactly what you were doing to us. And then also like there's this kind of IQ factor around gay sex that heterosexuals like often, I think have a blind spot to the fact that they think it's gross. But when they're saying like, oh, I can't believe you guys just do that. They wouldn't say that I think to their heterosexual. Peers people to you. Oh, no. I mean, like in general like like, I talked to one friend. She was being really kind of like nasty about grinder about just like gay promiscuity, and I'm like, you.
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"I wanna talk more about this body image thing because I've heard you talk about it a lot recently. And I'm like, I don't know. I don't know if it's like, I don't I just well, what is your picture on Grindr? Is it your face? Or is it your body? Oh, it's my body. Yeah. But because I also don't want to show my face. I get that. Also, my body isn't like sick or anything like. But then I guess that's interesting. Maybe that's why I haven't been around to rob doesn't get less messages. But it I mean, I can't say that. But it's just like it's interesting to use. Would you say the chief reason that you used your body? I would I would on as you would say it's because you don't want to get your foot people know who you are. But like, yeah. Sure. Like, maybe. But like dot is the reason why I do it. And I would. But my wish I could put my face because I actually do things. Hi to use my face now. I know I know and I wish I wish I could. And I think what I'm trying to say is like when you do meet people who are like super docked on Instagram, or whatever are they not like also like a suffering from the same types of thing. I think that everyone is in their own body and makes up every day. And like, it's I would say it's the rare person that looks in the mirror and says, I'm absolutely one hundred percent happy here. But. I just think it's not really necessarily about what they feel about themselves. Like when you go on there as someone who's decided to love onto the app. It's like you or then seeing that. And I think it can just be a little bit disheartening when you think about your own self someone who does look average or normal or like isn't like in tip top physical shape. I just think like to be able to see a sea of people who are projecting perfection can be tough, John. I just yeah. I guess that's like what grinder really? You're right grinder is a great example of a negative aspect of this private community. But I just say I just think when I see those people online like whether on grammar even had a gay bar. I'm like it is a bit of a red flag. I don't want him put too much like of my like energy into I guess comparing myself to people like that. But maybe that's just like my own journey. And I sometimes worry about like, you know, what I mean, so many hot different types of gay people. And I think people are embracing that more and more that I am like I worry about like, I don't know. Putting all this like. Like focus on people who are dislike jacked, I will say this. I never even talked to the torsos online. I talked to the faces because I'm like, I don't know if I'd want to hook up with someone that was just like only presenting their torso. Without a good reason..
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"And when it comes to what turns us on the nose really knows each one of us has unique body sent independent of the Cologne and perfume, we wear this involve our H, LA jeans or human Leukocyte antigen genes that control the makeup of bacteria on her skin giving us our unique odor. They also are an important component of our immune SIS. System and help identify foreign objects like bacteria in our body. Here's what's interesting. You can tell who you will love or rather left after by smelling. They're sweaty t shirt in a strange, but fascinating study, researchers told forty four male students to wear a context for two days in a row and to avoid Cologne and strong smelling, soap and then to seal it in a bag clothed up. Then those t shirts were given to forty nine women who then opened up the bag took a big ole smell, and then rank the t shirts one two five there wasn't one best smelling male. But rather different favorites for different women within prefer t-shirts of men who had the most genetically different immune systems from their own by sniffing. Our lovers. We can subconsciously determine who have different teams in ours me. Meaning if we have a baby together we will be passing on diverse genes to our offspring making a healthier baby research among queer couples. It's still new but early studies are finding similar results. So you know, what they always say when it comes to genes that control bacteria on our skin opposites really do attract. Devoid on Grindr. That's that's I mean, it's literally the unfilmable thing. The void that grinder will never be able to fill is like actual genuine ICU UC me. We both feel this way. Let's do it. Attraction is not existing on Grindr. I feel like anytime I've ever been on Grindr. And started to become myself is when people just like stopped talking. It's interesting. It's like, wait. What are you? Actually. It's like are. We all just like making the stop and brings him back to your point about. I don't know..
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"And also, even like, they've done studies on actual active grinder, and the whole experience is really interesting because it's the whole lead up to whatever sort of sex that you have it involves like, yeah. Like this weird. So one thing I would say the pro about it is that this weird conversation does lead to you explaining to the person type of sex. You wanna have right before you got there, which I think is a or like you actually got to be like this is what I'm sexually interested in. This is what I hope to have happened when I got there. Yeah. And and I think it could be beneficial when it comes to like going home with someone from a bar and not knowing what's about to. Yeah. I will say that I've had some of the best sex. I've ever had after being on Grindr. Because I've been radically honest about what I wanted to radically honest about what they want. And because you realize that you're going to be both on the same page you get there. And then you're able to do that exactly. And I do think that that's really important like a lot of sex. Is like it can be weird. Maybe you're into something like specific. And you can actually find people on that committee, which is really good. But another thing to your point. I'm gonna go back and forth right now. Because I think we're both back and forth. That's good. That's what we have to. Well. But actually, but for you look at it like. Verse in my early twenty s and now, I just can't hop on. Like I used to. Not at twenty eight. Yeah. That's right again that goes into it. That's a different episode called AIn whole said true. Yeah. But there's there's a lot of like even with orgasms like they're addictive like literally the way the brain reacts like a dopamine release. It's like it's really addicted to this stuff. Really think that doesn't important thing that we all need to talk about in the age of being able to access sex differently. Like, you just always have to be aware. Like, you said you had sex six days a week. That is an amazing thing if that's something that you want. But it sounds like it was something that maybe you've lost control of a little bit and people need to be aware that it's like similar peppers in your brain to cocaine and these other things I'm saying the same thing, but it's a dictum exit to anything. Yeah. True. It gives you a positive response back. You can get addicted to sink grinder is like, I don't know. I feel for me like any of the times I've been traveling like sometimes it's like, wow, it's like a dark waste of time where the conversations that you have with other men on the platform are a lot of them, very weirdly negative. Yeah. Like like, it's just like a weird microcosm that. I think a lot of people can relate to. But then sometimes like is it just having these weird conversations with lows. That's also it's also like deciding you're going to have sexual someone before you've been in physical proximity with. Them and like smelt them and like touch. Is I feel like that's no you're right part of sex like whether you're going to connect to someone like actually because I could look at someone's picture online and be like, oh, I wanna have sex with them and then see them in real life. And like, no, meanwhile, there are people that I've been so attracted to in the moment, and I was like I'm so surprised on my really attracted to this person. But I am because sex is sexual attraction is not about aesthetics necessarily. It's about chemical connection. Matt is totally right. So much of attraction is chemical..
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"See Doug podcast network studio. It's beautiful. It's warm. It's cozy. I don't I'm not overheating in our weird place. Okay. So maybe two minutes, no pressure and explain my riders bad. How could you? So basically what you said about no fats. No, no, Asians. And that being a thing that's existed in the community. And now that it's on Grindr. And now, it's become a narrative. Now, they can discuss it that doesn't mean that people aren't now experiencing that I think on a magnitude that they never have before. I mean, I think that it's almost a situation of like, yes, we have Trump, and that's bad. But didn't you get so many people to vote it's like it's like a chicken or the egg situation. Like, I don't know. I'd rather not people experience this kind of hatred online because that's exactly what it is. It's racism. It's all these things. I do understand what you're saying. Now, we can tackle this subject and people are now being forced to talk about it. So I think you have a good point there. However, I am concerned about the language on there. And. I think it actually contributes to a sort of sexual humiliation before it even happens. I don't think it can have people feeling good about themselves sexually. I think if grinder is going to continue I think they need to make big changes. I think there needs to be some sort of like ban on hate speech in the in in chatting, I think that there should be not that they should watch it necessarily. But like, I don't know maybe something where you can't say, no, fats Novem, no Asians in your profile or something like that. Or else the profile gets flagged or something? I think it's extremely harmful. I have a lot of concerns about, you know, setting people up in strange environments when they can represent themselves as anything they can catfish other people. This is something with dating apps across the board and then social media profiling, but especially in when it comes to you're going to essentially like lie to someone about who you are sexually what kind of atmosphere they're going to be entering an vulnerable way. I have a lot of concerns about that. Also to be honest with you just as someone who exists in the world and susceptible to social media going online and seeing perfect torsos all around me can make me think to myself. Wow. If my body isn't perfect. What the fuck am. I do think it contributes to sort of mental emotional and sexual deterioration in a bullying of oneself. Wow. Okay. Good the alarms going off. That's my kind of like, I guess just to cap it off. I would say, and I know my two minutes are up. But no where people were fucking for millions before this thing. And I definitely agree with you that there is community on there. But it also makes me sad that our community exists in that space. So when you say you're susceptible to social media what you mean by that like that is very simply that when someone is able to project a perfected image of themselves or an image of themselves that is very distorted and may not exist that reminder uses anything the gay community mean talk me like buff. Like nothing about like, if you don't look this way here worthless. And you're not going to be worthy of my attention. And sometimes I'll go on grinder, and it'll just be like fifty torsos that are like perfectly ripped and beautiful PECS and everything and I'm looking at myself in the mirror, and I'm like, I don't look like that. And then I think wow, does everyone else look look like that. And then you that's they'll Franken laundry list of things that are to worry about be yourself up for already as a gay millennial and like someone in this world is trying to. You know, have a good self esteem and have a good level of confidence. Like, I think it contributes to a lot of depression to be honest with you can make you feel very far away from everybody..
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"However, you're listening to your podcast that really helps with the algorithm. So that other people see it. But again restarted this not that long ago. It was a project that really wanted to do we're having so much fun with it. We love interacting with you. We love making these podcasts over grilled excited to know the Oculus Nate and enjoy them. So essentially, thank you. So we in the debate today are going to be talking about grinder. I'm going to be taking the position I think grinder is a good thing. And I will be taking him a position that I think are probably is something we can do without. Anecdotes galore, we've already so I'm gonna go first two minutes on the clock. And I'm going to explain to time. Okay. So one thing that's really interesting about grinded. I've recently is that studies actually found that it is the most effective way at reaching the queer day community about preventions of STI so they've found that when they actually want to explain something like HIV prevention, which is like obviously still so important in our community or like any sort of whether or not it's something mental health wise when they they've tried like they've literally done free HIV like vending machines on the streets or like taking ads in the New York Times. And like nothing works when trying to click through website. But when he put Hudson Kreindler got the highest influx of people actually using it for an educational purpose, which I thought was really interesting. Also, there's this thing called home affiliate, which is something. That's I don't know if it's finally affiliate which is talked about a law in our community, which is that. And they've studied that white men on Grindr. Well, more likely. Hook up with other white men on Grindr, Homa files, homo files. Yeah. Okay. Whereas like other diverse races won't will hook up with diverse people. And that has been created like a narrative, I think in our community because of the no fats, no fans, like no, Asians conversation has come out of grinder visually. We've had like almost see that and deal with it like, whereas I think without grinder it might have been something that like slowly brewed in the conscious that people weren't actually attacking. So I think that it's true. And there's so much racism in the gay community has been brought to the forefront because we've actually had to like experience it through grinder. Also, I think about us as like privileged people in big cities because after World War Two like gay people went to San Francisco that created the community there. Then there's L A New York Toronto. That's where gay people gathered, but not all gay people can do that. And I think grinder can be a really amazing resource for people who are in smaller towns or not actually able to just like off brand New York. I'm like is everybody gay? And Lastly, I would say that it's like legitimately a gay space and not gain neighborhoods are sort of like going away. It actually is a place where you can log on and literally speak to other game in which I think at a time with more necessary, but doesn't exist as much anymore. Okay. Yeah. Well, did that change? Honestly, you you made it you made some great points. I feel is actually made a lot of my points already. So we're going to see and this is so interesting because you put us on a timer, and I'm used to being on a timer for my frenetic. I don't think. So Honey, I ru podcast. So I am good on a timer. Okay. Okay. But also no pressure because I know that you're like hearing it was like doing our bodies. But also. I'd say if there's a weird energy in this audience because we're in New York. Visit New York energy. There's an amazing New York. Energi.
"grindr" Discussed on Sidenote
"Have you ever hooked up with someone who's known who you were from last cultures? I well, not from grinder. I find that like in community like Instagram deeming is now replaced who use. You guys talk about that a lot on your bucket that you think that that's like the new apps or whatever kind of is. Because it's like when someone is speaking to you on Instagram. I feel like there's a reason you You know, what know I what mean. I mean? Especially like the hero. We talk about on the pot, and they hear that we say like we go to our DM's like so. Specifically being like like with this podcast. It's like where you're seeing almost like, Jen. I think on Instagram. Well, Instagram's also like drug of choice not on Facebook anymore Twitter. I I like I don't recall respond on there. But Instagram is like I think where people can easily like that's the phrase slip into your DM's. And I'm not like I'm not actively using grinder right now. The we'll I'm on it. Like, I checked it like recently like I'm not like going out and like hooking up on right now. Whereas like there was a time during my open relationship where I had I discovered because I didn't have grinder before. I started dating my axe. I got it when we decided to be open because I had never been on Grindr. So I downloaded it. And we were crazy on it. That's true. Nope, amine. It's like, whoa. And I was like I can get this all the time. And then you run into problems which are talking about it in my story. But yeah, it was like I'm going to say we were dating for like a year. And then I got grinder, but one was this in relation to now. I'm gonna I'm gonna say, oh two and a half years ago. Okay. Hey, I was on it like, and I was using it actively for like an eight month period during which time I hooked up with a lot of people, and we can go into your story. My story is like my story is like there was a week where I used it. And I think I hooked up with like six people in a week long. Lots almo- that could have been one day. And it was I also think I hooked up with a with two people in one day. Once I was like, the horny assed little takes time. And honestly, like, I don't know. I was just bouncing around. And I was like, wow, the fact that I'm being so promiscuous on this like and everyone else, I assumed it was always just so wrote it was so by the numbers like everyone was so used to doing this. I was like I wonder if this is going to like potentially have a bad consequence for me about this year of sexy. Kim sheera it wasn't even sex. It was like full-blown. Hey, guys. It's like, you're a sexist Joe sex in somebody else a lot of work. It's not always going to happen. And that's another thing for people to understand when gay guys say we had sex. It's like the that can just mean you like backed off together truly. But so I was having all these experience. And I was like I wonder if this will hit me by me, mass, no pun intended. Gotten STI oh my gosh. What never? Yeah. Okay. So it was warts. Wow. And so and actually I went to a city MD, and they was that a city MD is like this thing in New York. It's it's sort of like a fast casual doctor's office. Is it crazy? How does that work place from three health got what like visa like what do you mean? We basically pay a co pay. So it's like a twenty dollars situation every time if you have insurance you can go use this. Okay. So I happen to have insurance than God. And so I was able to go in there once things were acting up..
"grindr" Discussed on LGBTQ&A
"Help paying your bills or anything like I got you. I got you just be my girl though, and they wanna keep you on a shelf, but. I'll never you don't in. Consider you don't get introduce their friends, their family, nothing. You're literally just a shiny toy for them and they love it. Love the shiny toy. And a lot of them date, trans women exclusively, which is the funny part, but they would never just be with one because it's so shameful or at least it was, you know, we're breaking that barrier now very slowly slowly, but, but it's beginning having while I'm still attractive. I've got like six good years. Left on me. Send a call out now. Right? Help help. Also still pay my bills. To me, but also in public sponsor me in hub leg. Okay. So how how do you? How do you meet people normally are using apps in the dating dating apps, dating apps? Just like everybody else. I mean, people get from time to time, but people are so flaky these days, you almost need a dating app to give it like a lockdown because you meet someone like in a bar. You never end up meeting that person again, or you get lots of communication. They start dating someone else and it's a small community. So you know that girl anyway, but it happens. Absolutely happens, but I don't think dating is hard. It's finding a connection that's hard, and that's not a Translink people. Anybody, it's literally everybody like people that understand you are hard to find, especially going to keep them instantly with them. Yeah. Sometimes I see trans woman on Grindr grinder. Absolutely grinder. Yes. Grinder is like the new frontier for transplant because it just got trans inclusive and friendly. So now like, oh my God, some of the hottest guys are on there, but they're saying the stupidest shit. So I haven't really done much, but I'm sort of seeing someone from their interests. They polish football player. Yeah. And so how does he identify like sexualize? Heterosexual, but he. But he was on Grindr? Yeah. Now there's a bunch of hetero guys on Grindr looking for trans women now the criminal argot that, yes, like the got in there so rude about it because my gaze are telling me that like went hit on this guy and he's okay, bro. It says only Schranz on my thing. No dudes. And I'm like on at several spec fall. They didn't call me a dude. And taking the complement. It's just it's very overt. It's still grinder, like it's still kind of. Gotcha. Dicey like you have to sift through in his that kind of becoming a norm. I guess there's more and more trans women on their straight mess. So many transcendent straight many. You list under your tribes trans, and then you're gonna find trans attracted men, Schranz trans men, a lot of cysts. Hetero dudes who are looking for trans women. That's amazing. It's amazing. It's literally like grinder was not for me just a year ago and so to sign on now kind. I'm so glad I'm single great. I can see all of my options that takes care of a lot of safety issues. Yeah, I know it really does because they're getting themselves into the like, you know that these women are trans. So just because tender like you have to put it in like the first part of my bio because you can't click trans like they say that they got more inclusive. They did not. I'm sorry because people. Would hit me up and be like, oh, man, if you weren't trans, it'd be so hot. I'm like, no, I'm still so hot. I'm just trying stupid. You just can't have any. Not that that's a huge insult. It's a huge and seldom like it's just like you're pretty for a black girl or she's just pretty. Yeah. Like, did you ever think of that?.
"grindr" Discussed on The Bone 102.5
"To an orgy we'd, like to know a what invite look. Like and and be Did, you, go, I'm looking at the definition from the dictionary of orgy it seems like it, focuses. More on the party aspect of the sex, a wild party especially one involving excessive drinking and unrestrained sexual activity So I mean it's more about the, just as much, about the party as it is about the sex Yeah but the the. Sex is the headliner it is but but it opening acts a. Really good too that's where. You party you drink a little bit in just whatever substances you're. Gonna jazz this is one of those one. Of those concerts were I'm only showing up for. The headliner I don't hate the party ahead. Of time I've just just there to. See my favorite act how man, promoting, promoting a barbecue, on Grindr, that's, a pretty ballsy move right there a no. Pun intended that is well. If. You're friendly community stores Carolina we don't know anything about that, down, here just inviting random store barbecue yeah the some dude gave. A glowing review. Of the party's saying quote I can't stress enough how inclusive everyone, was from the second we walked up everyone was, so welcoming because of the, small nature of? The group it felt personal and everyone felt like family barbecue not orgy Judah out alive who are you I'm the person didn't end up going, to the orgy oh but I heard that a, better name for now is. Like genital jamboree That's a great phrase ma'am where did you hear that Oh there's on invite I invite. But it was. Touch message was easy, with. The.
"grindr" Discussed on KIIS 102.7
"Just make you feel you start incredible it's getting the shelf so michelle is on the line she's reacting to this call from a second ago jenny's boyfriend has grinder on his phone or is on grindr and she she stumbled upon this but he doesn't know that she found out that he's on grindr and it's you know it's in her head she's wondering if she should address it because you should address it michelle go ahead you're all this all right good thank you for ask him you're welcome so when i heard this i mean this probably is not going to make her feel much better i think you should create a fake grinder account for asking questions on there really find out she's trying to figure out if she should say anything or not say anything and i mean you're a look i i think it's very compelling your suggestion but they're just living in this state of dishonesty and trickery and everything else right yeah i mean it's not the most honest way but she's gonna find out the real truth she can really catch him yeah i'd like to say i wouldn't do it but i might might just be the easiest way to find out without having to say hey i stumbled upon your the way she can go in with the knowledge saying okay yeah you were flirting with this person caught you red handed it more or michelle she can go in covertly did you get the data i get the information have the intel and not tell him that but just sort of deuces deuces what was means like peace out oh yeah just sort of like let the relations allow right now or you can find out if you like really maybe she'll learn something about well michelle happy to have you on this friday morning thank you for calling you're very welcome by yes patty or she can do the right thing and just ask him don't be ridiculous do the right thing and just confront him just ask them not confront him just ask him disaster him but i don't like your suggestion either really patties no ryan yours just like knowing the information than just letting it fizzle because i was michelle suggestions she was saying i was saying she should go on no she was saying she could go and grinder and pretend to be somebody interested get the information that i said and the needle to say you ever did that right but i think the right thing to do would be to tell the guy wire piecing out because you found out that you're interested in not in me some thing to do aren't we all just mature so.
Grindr, Criticized for Not Protecting Users HIV Status, Draws Criticism from WeHo City Council Members
"To stop and addicts path to self destruction under ricky's law drug users may be committed to treatment if the court decides they pose a threat to themselves or to others the deadline for closing the russian consulate here in seattle has passed komo's eric heintz reports aside from security officers today there is little trace of russians inside the consulate and residents in madison park were ordered closed by the trump administration in retaliation for russia's alleged use of a nerve agent to poison a former russian intelligence agent and his daughter in britain monday was the deadline the us expelled sixty russian diplomats and closed russia's seattle operation which the white house as an outpost for intelligence agents a former local fbi agent told the seattle times consulates can be used to run covert activities and naval base kitsap boeing and microsoft are potential local targets eric heintz komo news sali's and auburn releasing a video they hope will solve the mystery of a hit and run that happened nearly two months ago komo's steve mccarron with more with little evidence no witnesses and no suspects auburn police hope this surveillance video will help lead to something bigger aclu's some tidbit of information that can help them identify the person behind the wheel of this older white or light colored sedan that was driving south on a street southeast the night of february seventh but you can actually see the car hits connie braswell driver never slowed down never stopped just left her out on the road police say the car that hit braswell likely has significant front end damage should may have been a toyota someone a relative a friend a coworker has to know something about who was driving it and where the car might be now the victim remains in critical condition at harborview medical center popular gay dating app grinder says it will stop sharing its users hiv status that move comes after criticism from the aids healthcare foundation grinder says the data was not used to target advertisers were sold to third parties it was given to two companies to test the apps performance now they're working to remove that information from those companies the man shot and killed near seattle center early sunday mornings been identified as twenty one year old trayvon mccoy mccoy who was a local rapper last performed saturday night was shot in the head at first avenue north and republican street police have not released.
Grindr says it will stop sharing users' HIV status with third-party companies
"Lucien messenger is also adding the ability to send three hundred sixty degree photos back in january messengers david marcus who leads the team said that the app had become too cluttered and at the company would invest in massively simplifying and streamlining the app mozilla announced it's working on a new browser cold fire fox reality designed to work with vr ar and mixed reality heard wear no release date yet but mozilla says it'll be open source and cross platform fire fox already supports web vr and experimental java script api for high end vr headsets including the hd five and oculus rift but missoula chief r and d officer shaun white says fire fox reality will flip between web pages that contain two d and three d content and support voice recognition and connected devices grinder security chief bryce case that the company has stopped sharing users hiv status with thirdparty vendors local lyrics and abdomen is but that there has been a misunderstanding of what was actually being shared and that sensitive information in wasn't crippled and not shared case said that the company decided to change its policies around particularly sensitive information including hiv status although that status is an optional field within grinder for its users that if entered is publicly available information john gender ria stepping down from his post as google head of artificial intelligence after two years google engineering executives ben gomez and jeff dean will take over the department jointly the information reports that gender will stay google and be more hands on with technology and finally last friday instagram reduced how much data developers can pull from the instagram api quite a bit from five thousand to two hundred calls per user per hour and some third party apps for example and out that lets people see if someone follows them back are hitting api limits and broken functionality the company isn't commenting on the reduction but did say it stopped accepting submissions of new apps last week facebook announced the same after backlash.
Grindr Is Revealing Users' HIV Status To Outside Companies: Report
"How do you get started you can right now open the web on any device and goto https colon forward slash forward slash one dot one dot one dot one numbers of course and it will guide you through the installation process speaking of concerns about privacy online buzzfeed news is reporting that dating and hookup app grindr which caters to the gay community and has three point six million daily active users around the world has been providing its users hiv status to to outside companies apt demise and local lyrics both of these companies are described as app optimize irs which help improve app performance and reliability but according to buzzfeed by way of operation both companies receive information that grinder users choose to include in their profiles including their hiv status and last tested date buzzfeed says that because the hiv information is sent together with users gps data phone id an email it could be used to identify specific users and their hiv status as you can imagine activists and some users are not pleased to learn about this james kremlin stein a member of aids advocacy group act up new york told buzzfeed news quote grinder is a relatively unique place for openness about hiv status to then have that data shared with third parties that you weren't explicitly notified about and having that possibly threaten your health or safety that's an extremely extremely egregious breach of basic standards that we wouldn't expect from a company that likes to brandit self as a supporter of the queer community and quote cooper quentin senior staff technologist and security researcher at the electric frontier foundation told buzzfeed news that because grinder was sharing location information along with phone id sexuality and relationship status it could easily be hacked and used to triangulate user identity quote it allows anybody who is running the network or who can monitor the network such as a hacker or a criminal with a little bit of technolog or your isp or your government to see what your location is when you combine this with an app like grinder that is primarily aimed at people who may be at risk especially depending on.
Dead Austin bombing suspect identified; motive still not determined
"And tune in green tea service is bringing judy pielach snooze it is partly cloudy thirty nine degrees at o'hare i'll staff member and congressman randy hulk district office has been fired after police reports surfaced saying the aid was found shirtless inside a car with a teenage boy last october nick provenzano has long been active in the republican party in mchenry county he served on the board the police report indicates a seventeen year old boy told authorities he had a sexual encounter with provenzano in a car after the two met on grindr debates county voters said yes to a referendum calling for the merger of the election commission and kirk clerk's office just over fifty five percent of voters supporting that nonbinding measure the results coming in this morning because the commission experienced technical difficulties in closing its precincts county board chairman dan cronin his said that demonstrates the commission's incompetency lack of preparation one of losing candidates for cook county assessor wants to redo after some people were told voting for andrea raila would not count she had been the subject of a court challenge but in the end was deemed eligible i thought i would get thirty four thirty five percent of the vote and i thought i'd win by about a percentage point even though i was underfunded never did i dream that there would be such a fiasco on the day of election she gels wgn's john williams she believes it was done intentionally and is calling for a federal investigation fritz kagan one that democratic nomination over embattled incumbent joe berrios the federal reserve hiking interest rates by a quarter of a percent today and suggesting at least two more hikes will happen this year mocking a fixed rate below four and a half percent while the rate you're holding onto it's gonna jump to four point seven five or even five percent later this year bank rates greg mcbride no motive yet known as investigators near austin continue searching the home of a serial bombing suspect who was killed by one of his own bombs this morning still analysing internet searches and other there's probably books in there we don't know the.