20 Episode results for "Goat"

Encore: The Goat in the Garden

Circle Round

16:26 min | Last week

Encore: The Goat in the Garden

"Produced by the island at you are boston. Hi rebecca sheer here. Your circle round. Were taking a few weeks off for the summer as we get ready to present our fifth season of folktales from around the world. So today we're bringing you a special encore edition from the circle round archives. Really fun story. You may have missed the first time around. We'll be back with a brand new episode soon. In the meantime enjoy the ever heard the expression. Good things come in small packages. What do you think about when you hear that phrase well in today's episode. We'll put this old saying into action with help from a hungry billy goat a trampled vegetable garden and the very tiny hero who saves the day. I'm rebecca share and welcome to circle round. Were storytime happens all the time. Today story is called the goat in the garden. Versions of this tale have been told all over the world including latin america much of europe even parts of the united states. Some really great people came together to bring you this folk tale including one half of click and clack the tap brothers from the legendary. Npr program. carter ray malia so circle round everyone for the goat in the garden of all the people in sofia's life she loved her husband and daughter the most but of all the things in sofia's life she loved her vegetable garden the most. Hello my perky little peppers. My ravishing radishes. My beautiful beans. How are you my lovely lettuces. Perhaps you'd like a sprinkling of water before the sun comes up. Sofia grew enough vegetables in her garden to keep her family. Well fed with just enough vegetables. Leftover forsythias been simon to sell at the market every morning. Whilst afia was making breakfast daughter. Olivia would venture out to the garden and pick vegetables for that night's dinner then she'd go on her way to school but one morning while visiting the garden. Olivia saw something that made her chump. She tossed her empty basket high in the air as she scurried back to her mother. Who was flipping pancakes in the kitchen. Olivia you weren't even outside for two minutes. Did you already pick all the vegetables for. Oh my goodness you're white as a ghost. What happened trembling. Olivia pointed toward the kitchen window. Look for yourself. So fi appeared out the window toward where a live you was pointing there in the middle of the garden was the biggest hairiest billy goat sophia had ever seen. The goat was trampling all over the ground. Gobbling up everything vegetables. Why don't we going to do mama. Sophea pursed her lips and furrowed her brow. Then she stood up as tall as she could put her hands on her hips. I tell you what we're going to do. I'm going to march out there right now. And make that. Billy goat go away so sophia strut outside and approached the billy goat. She noticed his mouth was full of turnips. Good morning billy goat. What a fine breakfast. You're enjoying but listen young. You're strong and you can find food anywhere else anywhere so please get out of my garden. The goat glared over at sophia and began to speak. Don't you know who i am. I am the billy goat from the hills in mountains. So you'll get out then. He whipped his head around charged towards sofia. He's warns all set. Sophia ran back to the house as fast as she could live. You open the door door. The billy goat is after me. Puffing and panting sophia dropped onto a kitchen chair. Olivia lay a on her. Mother's quaking shoulder. Don't worry mother maybe. We just need to explain a few things to him. I will go out there. And i will make that billy goat go away. So olivia made her way outside and approached the billy goat. She noticed he was now chomping on carrots. Good morning billy goat. What a delicious breakfast you're having but you have to understand. My mother spends hours tilling the soil planting the seeds pulling the weeds. So please please get out of her garden. Just as he did with sophia. The billy goat glared at a livia and began to speak. Don't you know who i am. I am the billy goat from the hills and mountains. So so you'll get out then. He reared his legs up in the air and bowed his head and horns. Ready to charge. Elitist sprinted back to the house as fast as she goethe's after me and she to tumbled inside the kitchen just then her father. Simon came downstairs for breakfast. Before heading out to market he noticed his wife. Puffing and panting and his daughter on the verge of tears my darlings. My love what's wrong. has something happened. A livia was too distraught to answer. So sophia spoke up. She pointed shaky finger toward the window. Look for yourself. Simon gazed out the window and spied the billy goat by now. The goat was covered pulp and seeds as he tore into sofia's bright orange pumpkins. don't you worry my darlings. Maybe he just needs some sympathy. I will go out there. And i will make that. Billy goat go away. So simon marched outside and approached the billy goat. The goat looked up from his smashed pumpkins. Good morning billy goat or it's no wonder you're enjoying such a hearty breakfast. You must work really hard all that. billy goading. You do all day but my family. We work hard to and we need these vegetables. So please get out of the garden now. The billy goat glared at simon. Then yes he began to speak. Don't you know who i am. I am the billy goat from the hills and mountains. So so you'll get out. The billy goat reared up his legs and sculpt back down again sending up a cloud of dirt and pumpkin seeds signs. Scamper back to the house as fast as his legs curium. Olivia open the door. Simon staggered into the kitchen. His heart thumping million beats a minute. Sorry my love. I couldn't get the billy goat to leave now. All the pumpkins are gone and the carrots. Sophia glanced outside and ono. Everything else indeed. By this time the billy goat had ravaged the entire garden. In fact it looks less like vegetable garden now and more like vegetable soup. Olivia side now. We'll have nothing to eat nothing to sell and all have to start the whole garden over from scratch but even then who's to say the billy goat won't return from the hills and mountains again just then sophia. Simon and livia heard a small voice. Call out to them. I'll make sure that. Billy goat never comes back. I'll just need something in return. Who do you think is speaking to sofia enter family. And what do you think. She wants in. Return for getting rid of the goat. We'll find out what happens after quick break. Welcome back to circle round. I'm rebecca sheer our story. Today is called the goat in the garden when we left off a big hairy billy. Goat was munching up every bit of sofia's beloved garden so fiu tried making him go away her daughter olivia tried making him go away and her husband. Simon tried making him go away but each time they did. They heard this. Don't you know who i am. I am the billy goat from the hills and mountains. So you'll get out. The family was huddled in their small kitchen worrying about what they would do when suddenly they heard a voice a small mysterious voice offering to rid them of their problem in exchange for something sophia. Olivia and simon began glancing around the room. Hello who are you and where are you. We're interested in your offer. Can you tell us a out. Suddenly simon felt a little sting on his left ear. He began shaking his head and as he did down dropped. A tiny black ant. Simon caught the tiny black ant in the palm of his hand. Wait you're the one who can make sure the billy goat never comes back. Quite you know bigger than a drop of water. What can you do. The little ant stood up as tall as she possibly. Could i can help you. That's what i can do. I can get rid of the billy goat and make sure he stays in those hills and mountains forever only in exchange. I need something just a little something. If it isn't too much trouble of course not anything. Yes yes anything at all the little ant thoughts for a moment all right then. I would like some wheat for my family. Olivia looked at her mother and father. We can do that right we can. We'll give you two sacks full a weed. Little at the ant shook her head shoes sacks full show. I can't handle that much. One cirque still too much still chill much now. Sofia spoke up. How about a few grains then little and just enough for each member of your family. The ant smiled. That would be wonderful. I'll take four grains one firm e one for my husband and two for my twins. You have yourself a deal. Once everything was settled and sofia had carefully placed four grains of wheat into a tiny sack. The ant crawled out of simon's hand down the legs of the kitchen table and disappeared through a crack in the wood floor. Quietly the ant stalled over to the unsuspecting billy goat. Luckily the goat hadn't paid one lick of attention to the conversation inside the kitchen. He was too busy bending over the garden. Gulping up every last bite of sofia's vegetables in a flash the ant climbed up one of the goat's legs. She crawled across his hairy back and dashed over to his right ear. Then she bit down hard raised one of his legs to scratch himself but then the street over to his other ear and bit that one too now. She was running up and down his back. Taking tiny shop bites says she went. Anthill stepped on an anthill. The billy goat fucked up his legs and leaped out of the vegetable garden believing he was covered with ants. He began rolling around on the ground to shake all of them off. The billy goat kept rolling and rolling faster and faster and next thing you know. He had rolled all the way back to the hills and mountains where he remains to this day. As for the little ant well now that she'd help out so fia and her family. She was excited to take her four grains of wheat back home to her own husband and kids but for grains of wheat it turns out is too heavy load for one little ant to carry so sophia simon and olivia each lent a hand. The ant carried the first grain sophia carried the second simon carried the third and livia carried the fourth and they were all happy having helped out a new friend in need narrow. It's your turn. When was the last time you helped someone solve a problem. Maybe you went to hand with a friend's homework or you offer to family members. Some advice think about a time when like the aunt you help to get someone out of a bind tele grownup in your life. All about it. Then ask them to share a time. They came to someone's aid after all as the end. Today's story shows no matter how big or small we are. We all can be here and save the day. Can't get enough of the vote in the garden. We have other versions of this tale on our website. Wbz dot org slash circle around. We also have a bunch of other stories from all across the world. You can listen now on our website or by subscribing to our podcast on apple podcasts. Stitcher or wherever you get your podcasts and if you have a moment please register review. It helps other people find circle round today's story. The goat in the garden was adapted by jessica alpert and me rebecca sheer original. Music and sound design is by eric. Schimmel onus casting by lynn's csi along with help from our executive producer just scalper. Our artist is sabina on special. Thanks to this week's actors lauren. Weisman rosie elissa and brian on the door and ray mali yahtzee the madore family of voiceover artists. You can hear them on the audio book. The story of ferdinand and grown-ups. You can catch ray on the best of car talk from. Npr circle round is a production of wb. You are boston's npr news station. I'm rebecca sheer. Thanks for circling around with us. One of the best things about creating circle round is hearing from listeners. Like you circle round fans have been telling us about their favourite circle round stories and we're excited to share some of their voices with you song of the horse but like when needed since i by from the governor. Hi my name is yet colorado. I say which is in nine six nine. Like the plot. And i had colorado. My favorite story is the fantastic criminal. Favorite part is when he gets to start dancing. Someone mentioned an episode. You missed no problem. You can find every single circle round story on our website. That's wbz dot org slash circle round or wherever you and your grownups get your podcasts.

Olivia billy goat sofia sophia simon Simon Billy goat rebecca carter ray malia afia billy goat sophia Sophea sophia strut livia olivia billy goading Sophia Sofia Npr
Mythical Creatures Week Night Jokes (3-21-2020)

Chompers

02:50 min | 1 year ago

Mythical Creatures Week Night Jokes (3-21-2020)

"Once upon a time it was mythical creatures week on Chompers your morning and night tooth brushing. Show tonight's episode is fell bound to be a good one because we have some more magical jokes for you. Big Aside on the top of your mouth and make little circles with your brush around each tooth. Here's your first joke. What's a UNICORNS favorite summer food unit corn on the cob you may have seen cartoons of UNICORNS that make them look like pretty pony's but the pictures that go along with the old myth described them as short stocky goats Switzer rushing to the other side of the top of your mouth and give your front teeth brushed you? Here's your next joke. How did the troll get to work? Every day he takes the ferry fairies are tiny winged mythical creatures but a fairy is also the name of the boat that carries people then sometimes cars across a small body of water pool. So get it. A troll takes a fairy to work funny your tongue. Quick Brush and then switch your rushing to the bottom of your mouth. The midst about trolls say that they turn into stone in some might and that they hide under bridges in the fairy tale. Three billy goat gruff the troll. Who LIVES UNDER THE BRIDGE? Wants to eat the three billy goats but the goats make over the bridge by tricking. The troll Switzer rushing to the other side of the bottom of your mouth but don't brush too hard. Here's one last. Show once a wizards favorite subject in school spell Ling. You might think they'd be good spelling but they're actually a wiz that trigonometry your real wizard at tooth brushing great job tonight come back tomorrow for more town. Berries and until then rinse with water before you chompers production of Gimblett media.

Switzer billy goat Gimblett tricking
After the Meme is Gone: Playing Goat Simulator in the Year 2020

Controller Disconnected

10:39 min | 1 year ago

After the Meme is Gone: Playing Goat Simulator in the Year 2020

"Hello everyone. This is the controller disconnected. Podcast I am host with. Es Carneiro No. I am not speaking the language of my people. I am speaking goat. What I said basically translates to. Today we will talk about a game. That was was an internet sensation. But I missed the train when it was originally chugging along well I finally played at some time ago and got to see for myself what the fuss was actually all about. This is the viral phenomenon goat simulator. I believe most of you listening already know or at least hard off goat simulator but a good professor is always appreciated. Plus the game came out in two thousand fourteen which may feel like the last century to some people. It all started with a youtube video enough. A bucket prototype of a game where the player controls a goat. The goat runs against the car and gets run over being dragged with enrolling down the street. Soon as the car is gone. The goat gets up like nothing just happened. And it wasn't a victim of a hit and run and just continues to run along. The goat then goes onto do water normal things like hit random objects with his head climbing up ladders and Guinea launched across the map through another hit and run incident. What the heck is this elementary? Yo said some people game developing look so fun L. O. L. said some others. I thought somebody was talking to me on. Facebook and skype said almost everybody and then there were other commenters. Who probably said it in jest. But WHAT DASH. Truth behind your statement the claiming. Where can I buy this game? I want to purchase it. Where my currency please let me know? How can I do? So now? They weren't asking for a fully developed game. They literally wanted to exact thing that was on. The video broke. It was and that is exactly what coffee stain studios the developers behind goat simulator. Did after a little extra time and development fixing the game breaking bugs but keeping all the funny stuff that people wanted up to my zing in any some other things to the game they released the final product on April first twenty fourteen. That is indeed April fools. They so now that we've established how the joke came to be. We can talk about what the game is like and what it's actually got to offer. I've seen all kinds of simulators date from flight. Simulators to farming simulators racing simulators to truck driving simulators. But none of them quite make me experience. The feeling of being a member of the captain sub-family quite like similar. After you start the game navigate past the main menu you are dropped off into the familiar village from the video and are free to do whatever you want. No objectives no missions. No story no progress requirements. No skill trees no crafting nothing. The world of goat simulator is your oyster site note. I never quite understood why the world being Western means. You can do anything you want. But this isn't the illusionist so why won't be spending time looking into it so with the world at your feet? An endless possibilities. What do you actually do here? Honestly I don't know that's one of the reasons why I could never get into minecraft for example. I'm very making objectives for myself so I prefer a little bit of hand holding while a play. That's not to mention I'm already lost enough in life. I don't WanNa feel like that in my video games. But if you're like me you'll be glad to know that you don't have to be completely lost in this game. There are a list of questions you can choose to do such as getting a certain amount of points doing tricks and other more specific things. The point system works much like Tony Hawk series of skateboarding games with doing tricks but other random stuff will also give you points hitting stuff. Licking people jumping on trampolines. Almost anything you do. We'll give you at least a few points. There are also the achievements and trophies which comes standard with every game nowadays and they are what chose to go after during my time. Playing the game might as well get something to show off on my profile after Plano. The GOAT CONTROLS. Don't go too far. What was shown the original prototype? You can run and jump. Climb places in things and lick everything. We are very sticky tongue. I swear it must be caught with e poxy because it won't come off anything until press licking button again. Then let's go. In addition to those controls there's also a slow motion button. Which makes everything move very slow low fun for when you went to see chaos happening for longer or doing those complicated tricks. Like licking airplay. That flies above the village. The letter is one of the many crazy requests in the game like sacrificing your fellow goats on a Pentagram breaking up a Barbecue Party by rolling down the into it. Somebody a ufo by placing the beacon. Which is a beacon with a bacon on it. The ease in parentheses in a crop circle among others. There's also a rag doll button which makes the goat go limp. And let's the RAG doll physics. Go nuts on this poor little body if you WANNA cause for Gra hijinks does a whole under city just waiting for you to lick it up. Go through the village. And LET THE MAYHEM RUN FREE. You can crush dead mouses rooftop party ride the rollercoaster on the carnival. You can drive a boat. You can even buy hats. There's a witch had a bicycle hats and for the swans fans in the audience. There's also a cowboy hat Yai Ha. The city also has other activities such as riding bicycles or fit to go along with the bicycle add giving people rights and racists where you run as fast as you can and even run up walls poor corn stuff the spot. What the name of the game might indicate you don't have to play as just a simple golden goat simulator. There's a list of gameplay mode. Fires called Mutatis in the game. That changed the appearance of your goat and Sunday gave a special abilities as well. Some of them include the tall goat which changes the goats into a graph. The devil goats which you get by sacrificing goats on quest. I briefly mentioned before the Angel Goat which leads to jump higher and also flooded. The airwaves specially ability you get halo and Angel Wings and it's so cute a jetpack to fly around the place and my favorite the goat board which fans Skyro- will fight very enjoyable as well. I don't like it because the skyline though by having played Skyro- I just liked it because it launches things out everywhere. There are also a few fun. Easter eggs spread around the game. Such as the dead mouse party also mentioned earlier minecraft like blocks that lets you build a house and a Graveyard Win. Slighest the slender goat. It's got pale features and long legs and no face. Though by the time you notice those things it will already be too late. In addition to the original Villa Agenda City there are other expansions with greater. Remix is on the goats simulation. Go Emma simulator draws inspiration from warcraft and other similar games where you play a classic choice. And complete quests Guinea experience along the way lovely and unlucky new mutatis made specifically forty expansion in goats Z. Zombie outbreak has happened in the city. And you must survive by any means possible managing resources hunger and health. You mosquitoes ambiance and fend off any attackers to stay alive. And as its description says it's the only survival game not in early access at least the boys back in Twenty fifteen. There is also the payday expansion where you steal people's money and the wasted space expansion where you go to. I was very much looking forward to play them. But unfortunately they're all paid downloadable content. I didn't feel inclined to spend money so right didn't play them. Unfortunately the all look prefund from what I've seen those so if you're less attached to your money than I am go out and get them all for the record. I played the game on playstation four and it was one of the free playstation plus games that the month of January so that influence the tightness in my wallet a little bit however I did hear that the Nintendo switch version has all the content included. So that sounds like the ultimate version of the game. WanNa get it in conclusion. There's not a Lotta Has already been set in the past six years. It's a game. You play to have a quick laugh or pass the time when you don't know what else to play. I already use apex lightness to warm up for gaming sessions but can see someone else using this for the same purpose but in the end. It's really just a dumb game to quote the developers themselves. Goat simulator is a completely stupid game and to be honest. She'll probably spend your money on something else. Such as a hula-hoop a pile of bricks or maybe pull your money to get out with your friends and we'll go it. Don't actually a real good unless you live in a form though but to give them some credit. I checked out there website and they have a game called the West Board independent which looks very interesting. I think I'm going to check out some until then turn off your brain and go wild on goat simulator. And that does it for this. Episode of control disconnected. Thank you very much for listening. Please give us a kind review on Apple. Podcasts and Posher you can find an easy league for both on the show notes or you can go straight to write this. Podcast DOT COM SLASH CON disconnected. You can also subscribe to the show wherever you may be listening and we are available on all podcast platforms. This Leonard Goat will be watching. You don't want to anger the slender vote. Follow us on twitter and Instagram at the handle condis connected once again. Thank you for listening. I am a theorist Carneiro. And I will talk to you soon

Leonard Goat GOAT Skyro youtube professor coffee stain studios Guinea Tony Hawk Facebook skateboarding swans Yai Ha Carneiro Villa Agenda City L. O. L. twitter Nintendo
Thu. 09/24  The Rebel Alliance Forming To Battle App Stores

Techmeme Ride Home

20:01 min | 9 months ago

Thu. 09/24 The Rebel Alliance Forming To Battle App Stores

"Welcome to the technique right home for Thursday September twenty, four, twenty, twenty, I'm Brian, McCullough today the rebel alliance has a name Coalition for APP fairness Microsoft will make office available without a subscription software as a purchase. If you will say, hello to the Galaxy s twenty F E and does the gaming industry make pre orders and console launches so messy on purpose here's what you missed today in the world of Tech. It looks like an official rebel alliance is forming headed by epic and spotify. Alliance that is officially being called the. For APP fairness which claims quote apple taxes, consumers and crushes innovation and that this new coalition will advocate quote for freedom of choice and fair competition across the APP ecosystem and quote epic and spotify are the leaders as I said, but they're joined by match group. Base. camp. deesor prepare Proton Mail and tile among several others. So basically anyone who we've ever talked about having an official beef with apple is in there, but the coalition is not just. Going against apple of course, their guns are trained on the Google play store as well, and broadly just the group wants to push for new regulations around how APP stores in general are run quoting gadget. The coalition will allow those companies to pool resources and lobby as a group while giving clout to smaller developers who could never tackle giants like apple or Google alone it's open to companies of any size and any industry who are committed to protecting. Consumer choice fostering competition and creating a level playing field for all APP. An game developers locally according to the coalition. The group has proposed a code of conduct. It wants apple and other APP store owners to adopt it. Requests that developers should not pay quote unfair unreasonable or discriminatory fees that developers should have access to the platforms technical details and that they shouldn't be forced to use an exclusive. APP store quote including payment obligations and quote the gatekeeper. Platforms that these APP stores must not abuse the control they enjoy and must adhere to oversight to ensure their behaviors promote a competitive market and provide consumers with equitable choice. The self-funded group said in a statement, the basic freedoms of developers are under attack said Tim, Sweeney, chief, executive, and founder of epic. In a statement, we are an advocate for any company that's ready to reclaim its rights and challenge the anticompetitive behaviors that exist on APP store today and. This is an interesting change of strategy. Microsoft has announced that a standalone non subscription version of office will be released in the second half of twenty twenty one for both windows and Mac users. Quoting window central Microsoft will release a new perpetual release of Microsoft Office. In the second half of two, thousand, twenty one, the new perpetual release only appears in a single sentence of a post by the exchange team at Microsoft but it confirms that new versions of office are on the way to windows and Mac while many have moved over to Microsoft three, sixty, five, some prefer A. License for office that allows them to purchase a product once have forever. Microsoft. Usually releases perpetual updates to office every few years though some were concerned that office twenty nineteen would be the last perpetual update. Luckily for those who prefer a perpetual license, a new version is on the way and quote. No word on price or the exact date of availability. But for whatever reason, count me as one of those who enjoys having a perpetual license I don't know why maybe I'm old fashioned maybe just actually enjoy owning a thing at least in theory. I don't need a new version of office every year twice a decade is fine for me or at least has been for the last twenty years or so usually as Kate Cox snark quote software as a purchase what a novel idea and as Raj Sarkar tweeted, this is called disrupting the industry and thinking outside the box who said SAS pricing only has to be a subscription. No, you can easily build a price using perpetual cash flows and quote. It. Just Microsoft used to get perpetual corporate licensing and bundling with hardware sales. They still have that, and now they have a robust subscription product. So why leave money on the table even if we get to a world where everyone just pays uber or whoever it is that wins three, hundred, five, hundred dollars a month for transportation as a service there will still be some people who will WANNA pony up and pay thirty thousand dollars a year or more to actually own their own cars in such a world those customers will always exist. So why not take their money? We know you can already get the Galaxy S. Two thousand phones from. Samsung in three different flavors. There's the just s twenty the regular if you will but there's also the s twenty plus s twenty ultra, and now there's a fourth flavor called. The Galaxy s twenty f. e. f. e. according to Samsung stands for Fan Edition, which means I don't know, but it will come in six different colors. It will be available on October second and depending on if you go for the sub six Gigahertz Five G.. Model, it will cost six hundred and ninety nine dollars or it'll cost seven hundred, forty nine dollars for the EM wave five G. model quoting verge the s twenty f e has a six and a half inch display that slots it right in between these smaller galaxy s twenty and the larger s twenty plus like those phones the f. e. has one hundred twenty hertz refresh rate for smoother animation graphics. But unlike those phones it screen is completely flat and can't be cranked up to a QUAD HD plus resolution. Plastic on the back. But if it's anything like the twenties plastic, it'll probably feel alright Samsung is marketing the color choices heavily there's red orange, lavender, mint and white. All of these colors are prefixed with cloud Samsung's indication that they have a matte finish that should hide fingerprints otherwise low the doesn't skimp on specs. It has a forty five, hundred M H battery six gigabytes of Ram wireless charging six eight. Water resistance expandable storage, and the top flight snapdragon eight, five processor. The also loses out on having Samsung's higher megapixel rear camera options, but so far those extra megapixel been the huge win Samsung was hoping for at the beginning of the year it's main. Rear Sensor is twelve mega pixels with S, plus there's a twelve megapixel ultra-wide and an eight megapixel telephoto Samsung says the telephoto is a three x optical. Zoom and it further says it is keeping the thirty x space zoom feature I'll be at driven more by software than hardware those sensors do mean the Efi won't be able to swing eight K. Video, but that's not a huge loss. Samsung is also continuing its tradition of throwing odd duck cameras into its lineup as the selfie camera on the EFI is thirty two megapixel similar to what appears on the. Galaxy a seventy one and quote Samsung told debone at the verge that they hadn't been planning on doing an EFI model at all. But then the pandemic hit and they decided that they wanted a lower price point something in the premium mid range category. So from not even planning to offer one to designing one and getting it out the door all since March, pretty impressive iteration on Samsung's part when you say. Google has rolled out an update to Google maps that includes a layer that will show you cove nineteen cases per one hundred, thousand people over localities that you're searching with labels to indicate recent trends who will says this is coming to two hundred twenty countries and territories globally quoting tech crunch where possible the data is granular down to the city level. But that obviously depends on the numbers. Google is able to pull in who says the data comes from a number of sources including Johns Hopkins the, New York Times, and Wikipedia, which get their information from local and inter governmental government organizations. That's the same sources. Google pulls from when it displays Kobe data on its search results page and quote. So, you're supposed to be able to see this if you open up Google maps and tap on that layers button on the top right of the screen, the layers button looks like two pieces of paper stacked on top of each other I tried this myself this morning and I didn't have it yet just the usual traffic transit biking and three layers. But Google says it is rolling out on android and IOS this week. So maybe check again. More use cases for those smart lights that I got in that smart leading bundle available just to listeners of this show, my old morning routine involved repeatedly trying to get the kids up and ready for school. But now I have an Alexa routine set up with my smartphone that wakes them up by playing a rooster sound turning the light on and playing the weather report. So they know how to dress and every night. This never fails when I am finally comfy in my bed, my wife will. Ask did you turn the lights off downstairs? Well now I don't have to leave my warm cocoon. I can just say you know who turn off all the lights again the simplest way to dip your toe into the smart home waters is with smart lighting, simple obvious use case right and it's a good time to do. So because right now, you can get twenty percent off your Amazon Smart Lighting Bundle only at Amazon dot com slash tech team. Every bundle includes an echo dots smart speaker and a singlet color changing light bulb. That's Amazon dot com slash tech main to get twenty percent off and take advantage of this amazing smart home deal Amazon Dot com slash tech name. Our normal might have changed but that doesn't mean we've stopped finding ways to support and advocate for are under represented communities. So what we need now more than ever easy way to support each other from afar including charities. The paper at make sending and receiving money faster and easier than ever. But think about how you could use the pay pal to support the places and causes you care about the most support your local businesses with pay paypal's touch free qr codes to continue to shop safely. But also think about how you could use the pay pal APP to donate to a local nonprofit support 'cause from across the country, you could even get friends and family together to pool donations to help out someone you. All know who might be in need right now pay pal has partnered with leading fundraising platforms to take donations and even pool donations using the PAYPAL APP and pay pal offers this kind of transaction rates for confirmed five. Oh One C., three charities for most products pay pal is making it easy to support the places and causes we all care about right now because as ever pay pal is making it easy to pay safely quickly and easily download the pay pal APP, today terms and conditions apply. This is a Hella interesting raise not for any strategic reasons but just because I continue to be fascinated with what a big market and business. This represents. Goat group operates the online sneaker marketplace. Goat Goat Group has raised a one hundred million dollars series e from D. One capital partners at a valuation that some claim is in the one point seven five, billion dollar range quoting the Wall Street Journal on the size of this sneaker market. As I say quote sneaker culture has grown in prominence in recent years as young shoppers seek out rare shoe models, online, and pay. Thousands of dollars to collect them. It has helped propel the growth of new marketplaces and businesses such as group and Stock X in July research firm. Cohen, estimated these sneaker wear resale market is north of two billion dollars in North America with the potential to reach thirty billion dollars globally by twenty thirty. Naturally, the area has also drawn investor interest founded in two thousand, fifteen goat group previously raised nearly two hundred million dollars from investors including. Upfront ventures and retailer Footlocker, which last year invested one, hundred, million dollars in the company. Goat group plans to invest more to be a bigger platform for fashionable apparel and accessories even beyond sneakers including items sold directly by brands said, Eddie Lou goat groups chief executive more than three hundred fifty brands sell their products directly ongo groups platform according to the company Fashion Brand Alexander McQueen. This month to us go group to help introduce emcee Q label jackets, dresses, and other apparel and quote. Timely reminder that the talk saga is maybe not over in fact, there's another weekend deadline staring us in the face bite dance has asked a US court for a preliminary injunction to prevent the government from banning Tiktok from APP stores as trump's ban looms, it takes effect or at least it's scheduled to take effect again at eleven fifty, nine pm on September twenty seventh bite dance has submitted an application to the Chinese government to approve the current deal involving. Oracle and Walmart taking a stake in the company but we don't know how long that approval might take or even if it will come at all and thus the need for the injunction and even then there's still that whole disagreement wherein bite dance claims, it will retain eighty percent ownership of tiktok global. The new company that would result from the deal while Oracle says the company will mostly be owned by US entities and that bite dance will have no ownership. which you know, one of those two positions can't be true. Meanwhile, sources described frenzied negotiations continuing between bite dance and CIFS and fly by the seat of your pants deal making going on even at this hour quoting Reuters with bite dance and tiktok suitors Angling for an agreement that both the US and China can approve key elements of what would be the social media industry's biggest ever deal potentially worth more than fifty billion dollars. We're not spelled out and a comprehensive contract that is typically seen. In high stake mergers, instead the companies were asked to in principle and at breakneck speed to a serious twenty page revision awash in red. Font, with markups to a proposal that bite dance had submitted only four days before if bite dance did not have a deal by Sunday the Commerce Department would block downloads and updates to the tick tock APP. All sides agree that would take a twelve and a half percent stake in tiktok global a newly created US company that will house talks global business and Store US user data in its cloud with Walmart taking a seven and a half percent stake. But the fate of the remaining eighty percents they can tiktok global is in dispute bite dance says it would hold an eighty percent stake in tick tock global itself until it launches an initial public offering in the next twelve months and that it would then gradually reduce its stake. Oracle. Said on Monday that by dance would not have a stake in tiktok global at all and that it would be. Bite dances investors who would be awarded the remaining eighty percent stake. This is also how some trump administration officials and even a top by dance investor have privately described the deal. This discrepancy could be enough to scuttle the deal. If the Beijing based company gets to keep a majority stake, it would represent a major reversal for the White House? If by dance got no in tiktok global, it would be able to China where officials have been opposed to stripping by dance of one of its most prized. And quote? So you might be as tired of this saga. But just a note to keep your eye on it because it might not be anywhere close to done. Nick Stat at the verge looks into something that I've always wondered about myself. You know how every time we get a new. Generation of video game consoles. They always seem to be sold out. The companies can never seem to meet initial demand which there might be covert excuse this time. But if you think about it, don't these companies always fail at pre orders think back to previous generations it's always been thus right So maybe just maybe this is all purpose full. Maybe there's at least an implicit desire to create a narrative of scarcity and thus demand and status stat seems to agree with me quote why in the year two, thousand, twenty our companies as large experience, and well funded as Microsoft Sony and invidia still failing pre orders. It's an especially puzzling question when companies like Apple Samsung and even facebook owned oculus seemed to figuring out how to properly manage expectations and sell A. New in demand service without turning it into a stress inducing scramble, we still have no idea how many units any of these companies intend to sell or how many they allocated to each retailer or to what extent they plan to restock at any point this year right now, if you don't have a confirmation email in your inbox for a new playstation or xbox or receipt for an invidia Arctic's thirty eighty card you may not get your hands on one until two. Thousand Twenty one everything is sold out with little to no information on when the situation may change with record demand companies like Microsoft and Sony could very easily implement a lottery system or any other manner affair preorder processes, or they could allow retailers to disclose how many consoles they have among other ways of helping manage consumer expectations. For instance, the oculus quest to which went on sale last week and start shipping on October thirteenth is simply back ordered by about A. Month in the US and Canada instead of telling people a product is sold out and hoping they'll check back at the right time without any idea when that might be oculus transparent about win. It expects the product to arrive and is still taking orders. Apple does the same every year when it launches new iphone smart watches, tablets and other devices. The primary issue play may be one of misaligned incentives. The video game industry is fiercely competitive and a primary motivator for even. The video game industry is fiercely competitive and a primary motivator for even companies as large as Microsoft, and Sony is getting to signal to investors, analysts, and consumers that a product is flying off the shelves and almost impossible to find immediate sellouts for these companies is a positive development because it means demand is higher than supply and they don't have to worry about. Producing units that sit unsold on store shelves or retailer warehouses in an ideal world, this would be a solved problem just as apple has streamlined, the process of selling as many iphones as it can every year but the video game industry doesn't have much to say about how it intends to fix this and it's not clear. These companies even care to try and quote. To successfully preorder a PS five. So I guess I'm in the. Sometime in twenty twenty, one vote, which is fine by me. We're mostly intend to switch family at the moment and except for that Spider Man Miles Morales game, there's really no game that I see on the horizon that we need to have at the moment. Plus I'm still obsessed with Crusader kings three on the MAC. Anyway remind me to tell you whenever we do the next Listener Colin episode about how I'm slowly but successfully turning the dominate of Vanua into hopefully eventually the through France or at least the true burgundy if only I can get that pesky emperor of West Franchi to die and have too many airs and have them squabble over the bones of the empire soon soon, talk to you tomorrow.

Microsoft Samsung apple Google US spotify Sony Amazon official China Proton Mail Alexa paypal Brian Goat group Goat Goat Group
Episode 74: Tiffany Becomes The GOAT

The Ladies of Strange

31:33 min | 1 year ago

Episode 74: Tiffany Becomes The GOAT

"Well we are the ladies of strange. I'm Ashley I'm Tiffany. I'M REBECCA. Thank you for joining. Us each week as we discuss the history mystery in theory of all things questionable awed an eerie. Hello Ladies Tiffany of fun with your bat wings over there have Bingo arms. I was dancing and singing as we did the intro in my head and caught a glimpse of my arms flailing on their own. Who's a great time? You look like you're doing the chickens. My arms were doing. What's about me. She didn't she didn't get the memo. Yeah it was great. Well any US a little bit of business to take care of before we dive on dive over. We have to thank our lovely patrons who joined us in the month of February guys. It's crazy talk. Yeah we're still shocked. We Love Y'all a terminally like moths to a flame. Except for less deadly we are. They don't always die when they so. Who Do we love first off? We have kitty. Thank you and then we also have caroline. I have been told it is line not Linda. Thank you caroline. Hi Caroline wrong. You can get mad at me. Yeah do it and then we have our friend that guys might know from the not long island. Iced tea episode Leah has increased her donation. Thank you so much my love. Thank you Leo. And thank you everyone because again. We're still kind of in shock. That people want to donate US break. We're we're in shocking people. WanNa listen to us. Yeah first of all fair and then you go above and beyond in. Were just like what exactly like that. So every time we get a new patron rebecca or Ashley. Whoever checks the email? We'll send a screen shot to the group text and then there's mass chaos and panic and scream together. It's great yet so we appreciate that. And if you want to and if you would like to calls that you because mass hysteria so smooth much now you can go to patriots dot com slash ladies a strange and sign up. And we'll do the same for you will there's bloopers there's bonus episodes. I like us out. Postcards postcards are fun so that happens sometimes random goodies and postcards and all sorts of fun stuff anyway. Enough Business Tiffany. What do you have for us? We'll guys Saint Patrick's Day was Tuesday and in the US. We wear green. We pinched people who aren't wearing green. We drink beer usually guinness or a beer dyed green and then everybody claims to be Irish. Even if they aren't true yeah I haven't here insert someone at the table. Saying I'm Irish which I think I have like a teeny tiny portion. I am not like on on one second. I actually can pull it up for you if I can find my My APP where I spit in a tube and they told me where I'm from. That's how that works. Twenty six percent Irish and Scottish. There you go. That's plenty to get drunk on Saint Patrick's Day. Well I don't need an excuse but I will and my think it's my mom's side family is Irish so top the morning to you. I read evening or day whenever you're listening. I'm fairly certain I'm mostly Scandinavian. I could see that yes. That's the question. Well in honor of this wonderful holiday that is most definitely not about a man driving snakes out of Ireland Snakes and Ireland Ashley. You're giving me look. I've never heard that tail will. Oh yeah that was one of the things. Saint Patrick was known for driving the snakes out of Ireland. Oh well good for him. I do have a clip below on my notes from the Encyclopedia Britannica on their entry for Saint Patrick's Day in an article. I didn't check sources on for the snakes thing so if you have any interest in that I can tell you about it but anyway I'm going to put on my festival hat and tell you guys about something that's GonNa Make Ashley. Hella uncomfortable is. It is not frogs. I'm a good friend so just going to say like after my last episode guys. I really appreciate you letting me vent. I feel so much better. Well I wanted to do something light and fun because of our last episode and I was like. Let's find an Irish festival. I don't want to do a Saint Patrick's day one because there's lots of stuff out there on Saint Patrick's Day. It's awesome but I wanted to do something different. The one I found. That's really fun. I got like halfway through with my research and it was like. Oh Shit actually is gonNA hate this. Oh well we're recording and a couple of hours so thanks best friend. You're welcome here to help. Oh so excite much joy so the puck that's The p not an F. thanking them with an F. it would make rebecca uncomfortable. We've already covered many options. They could cover the fuck festival so the PUCK. Fair is one of the longest running festivals. In Ireland it takes place August tenth through the twelfth in Kilgore kilogram build it. Practice this on my lunch break and completely forgot behavioral fucking say it Killorglin. Nope something like that. County Kerry with a population of over. Just over two thousand. So what do you think the puck festival is? I want to say hockey but I have nothing against hockey. So is it ducks. Who Play Hockey. Oh the mighty ducks festival. See when I saw puck I immediately thought of goats and I thought you guys were this about goats this is about a goat. Why the fuck does puck make you think of goats. I should've looked this up. But didn't I'm pretty sure that there was some mythical creature that was either named Puck or had puck in the name that was part goat and or maybe there was a movie that involved a Puck? I don't know but I immediately thought of goats but you didn't think of it well enough to know. Hey my best friend won't like this whole now. I figured that out pretty quick. But hey whatever so the puck. They're basically as three days to celebrate. Ashley's least favorite animal ago catch. The first day of Puck is known as the gathering on this day. Our lovely King Puck. Yes he is. The king is thrown. Donna stand in the town square by the Queen of Puck and a giant for Horse Festival is held. Would you like to unpack this giant? What will horse? But I'm still confused about for duck to go to horse to talk to. Who'D HAVE NO PUCK? What is happening? Well we'll start unpacking so three to five weeks before the fair which I think this is cool because it's always held the tenth through the twelfth. No matter what days of the week it falls on so about three to five weeks before the fair a group goes out and catches a wild park which is a male goat in the mountains. They spend that time acclimating him to humans with that surround and preparing him for his shining. Moment he is then hoisted to the top of a giant stand to rule over his subjects for three days before returning to his home. So how many hours have you logged in goat simulator? So far I forgot about that game. Actually I only played it one night and man. That game was weird. Wait so they kidnap a wild goat. Put Him on top of a literal pestle For three days and and then just let them go. This is my goats are so fucked up. They take care of the goat okay so they have a disclaimer on their website. That it's the goat welfare statement. So let's see here. The welfare of the goat is of most importance to all involved. In organizing puck fair. We have strict protocols in place to ensure this as they are overseen and checked by an independent veterinary surgeon. And then they've got the welfare statement that you can pull up a statement regarding the Puck Fair Committee regarding the treatment of the goat and is a pretty long think. Yeah they make sure that he is fed watered taking care of. Yeah but the no stress as part of the problem. You're taking him from the wild. You're partially domesticating him. And then releasing him back into the while also why well we will get to the why. That is a good question. Very good question. I appreciate you asking the first. We're going to start talking about the queen of Puck because she was next in that statement. Okay so we had the king of Puck or just just a goat on a stool a literal goat. Yeah and they have a new one every year. Just a random. How do they know do they? Tag Them I don't know I think the one from two thousand nineteen was the blackout one from twenty thirteen. I know was a white goat. Can't remember I saw pictures of the fifteen one but I don't remember but any guesses on what the queen of Puck is a lady go back is very confused. What what is the Queen of Puck? The Queen Puck each year. A contest is held where ladies in the last year of Primary School? Which is sixth grade rate in to explain why they deserve to be the queen of Puck? Their interview didn't ask to read. The famous puck fair. Welcome speech allowed before a decision is made. That speech is then recited during the coronation ceremony. On Opening Day as Queen. She has an official lady-in-waiting and up to ten assistant girls who were all similarly chosen. The coronation of Queen Puck is celebrated during a ceremony evening of entertainment about a month before the festival begins her ceremonial duties as Queen besides addressing her subjects during the coronation ceremony and meeting and greeting visitors to puck fair throughout the festival will be to crown the goat during the crowning ceremony. On opening day of the Puck Fair also known as gathering day and make his coronation as King Puck official so a young child is dressed as a queen and crowns. The king gives him a crown royal crown atop his head up on the podium. It's great or is it for fun. Why she also removes the crowd at the end of the festival. He doesn't even get a souvenir to take it back. A goat buddies. And we'd like check what I did this last like six weeks guys now. They're just not going to believe him. Well somebody asked and one of the websites I was on like. What if the Goeke? It scared being up high on that. Podium Ashley Shaking Your Head Yeah Eight. They could attack trust me. They're mountain goats they're used to being. Pi. Yeah but not in front of thousands of people learning a rage on them but people are going to understand what goats are so evil goats need to rule over people. This is how they do it now goats they feel like that. I know you can look in their eyes and see they wanted to dominate about Soda Soda. Satan that's why they have the same is so they do like keep an eye on the goat. Don't worry the goat is fine. Not Worried all of this. The vet last year reported that the puck he examined before and after the fair was physically and psychologically unchanged from his experience Assess for goat. Still angry you. He's good to go. He gives them the horseback test. What's it called the Horns Rohrschack? Were Shaggy. Look at the in clubs? Yeah I think you call it. Horsh ashes to the Shah. And there's a little place where we can kidnap go whole foods. He does come down from the podium periodically. They take him down and give him access to fresh food and water. Yes food up there and like a betting. But how big is this stool? I was a little upset when I saw how they keep him but apparently they take care of him and his care is of the utmost importance. But it's not a big cage. You're saying that just enough that I'm concerned about the Goethe's provided with dry betting that is adequately drained and also sheltered from the elements. It also has adequate room to move and turn unrestrained in its enclosure without fear of injury on a stool on a podium. I didn't realize he was like paged. And it's a goat lighthouse well so these goats are usually isolated. The research has shown that these pucks that they're pulling from don't join females or the young until mating season October so they're used to being by themselves doing their own think yeah not on a pedestal. People re range not just locked in a cage. I know I know it's not going to get into that because I didn't go too far into that. But Yeah and then the Horse Fair. We're GONNA pack that part next part of the puck festival. Yes this is all day one with the Horse Fair. This is where we're going to take us into the history of the cute. Okay okay this is going to take us into the history of this fair festival because this fair festival. This quaint Cute Fair Mary. Things that translate better via paper on the puns. All right so there are a couple of theories on the origin of the puck fair. Unfortunately no one knows the truth but here are a few theories. And the time of Daniel O'CONNELL known as the liberator. This was the early eighteen. Hundreds O'CONNELL established his reputation as lawyer by taking on a case for the local landlord. Mr Harman blender has. I'm not going to get any of these names right or names of the places. The landlord had fallen out of favor with the authorities. In Dublin Castle. As a result he was not allowed to place a toll on cattle sheep or horse fairs this resulted in a huge financial disadvantage to blind or Hassett who hired O'CONNELL to take his case on his behalf. O'connell decided that the goats were not covered by the decree from Dublin Castle and that the landlord would be legally entitled to hold a Goat Fair and levy his tolls usual thus the fair began and put goat was hoisted on a stage to show all attending that the fair was indeed a goat. Fair now remember. This is early eighteen. Hundreds this is still the same fair not to separate yes. Same Fair this all the same. So is the goal like a red herring horse. Fair was happening below it. Probably but he was able to start making money again so capitalism. Got It the next theory. And this one's a little more popular there too that I saw the most. And it's this one in the next during the time of Chrome willion forces More in the sixteen hundreds now when Cromwell went backwards. Yes okay. That's why I don't subscribe to the Daniel O'CONNELL one because this came first. Yes during the time of the crime. Lillian forces when Cromwell and his cronies were pillaging the countryside at the foot of mack. Gilley cutty reeks mcgillicuddy. Yup that one looks like something out of Harry Potter lead. They came across a herd of goats gazing and the animals took flight before the raiders and the he goat or puck. Well hold on wait but not lake. They ran off flab their ears. Actually just had a new fear develop flying goats. They're now taking application for news. Bedford's friends who goes with wings like I'm sure that's a thing I'll have to 'cause you fear taking on new heights and our friendship has taken on new lows. High did not present the subject lamb. You are putting and not in a good way. Don't add fuel to fire okay. Well just a cursory Google search did not show up anything too scary when I googled goats wing. So you're so the animals scattered. Yes thank you and the puck and they had a panic. The puck Pourquoi on his own Question yes is the PUCK. You might have answered this already. But is the puck like the The he goat the male dominant male. The group's K. water it'd be dominant because they're solitary creatures so but he's with a group in this meeting time. Wasn't it probably? I don't know I don't know it. Just said he quote. Okay you go go actually the Irish. I'm not going to pronounce the Irish word for it. But puck fair is also known as something that roughly translate to fair of the he goat. Where am I own? Yes so the puck broke away and lost. Eventually he arrived in. What is now Cooler Glenn Organ Yup on the banks of Luan Yup? His arrival there in a state of semi exhaustion alerted the inhabitants of the approaching danger and they immediately set about protecting themselves in their stock. It is said that in recognition of the service rendered by the goat the people decided to institute a Special Festival in his honor and thus the festival has been so they took the goat and placed a modest stool. Thank you. There are probably like you majestic terrifying animal. Our our new king. We raise you up guys you saved. Us filmed are bad guys. I don't know I mean they think about like kings and Queens always said above everybody. During jousting festival thrones not stools. Well none of them. I never said anything about a stool. A stole from pedestal. Pettus Oh is this how it feels to be you. Who use me? Ma'am this is like looking at me and Ashley like Oh honey. No looking down on her. No but like the maybe I should have said you. Do you feel like tiffany right now. So yeah is what it feels like to be. Rebecca you make a comment and you just keep digging. I believe in this episode is about Karma pedestal not a pedestal. Just imagine like a stool fancy store with no fancy stool with. Hey it's better than a tiny cage. It's so the more plausible origins. Sim Back to Celtic Festival. Of An I am so sorry I am definitely going to butcher this one Lou. Hosna nailed in LUGHNASA. We weren't done well. No I was just trying to pronounce it a different way. L. U. G. H. NASA. Yep a hug NASA. The Pagan Festival predates Christianity in Ireland in traditionally takes place about halfway between the summer solstice and the autumn Equinox in early August. So it's believed that the goat is linked with the festival as a symbol of Pagan fertility. And a few sources said the goats were sacrificed during this. But that's sad so I didn't think about it so I didn't look into that okay but this means that it's a really old tradition. Really Old Seth We don't know how long this has been going on. But it can be officially traced back as far as sixteen thirteen when King James. I issued a charter granting legal status to the existing fair in Killorglin. So this is over. Four hundred years old minimally and it's held every year. The second day of Puck is known as the fair day on this Jay general cattle fear come up cows no wait. Did we ever talk about the horses? Sorry better basically whenever they said you can't tax these you can't get a toll on these animals there look fine. We'll do a goat one and then they pulled in money for all animals. But that's what I assumed. I've made a lot of assumptions and didn't write them in my notes so I was hoping people would connect the dots here connects the dots. That weren't there. I love it so I wrote. It's like a dollar store dot book. These pages stuck together but I still think that's a Pony. There numbered not sequentially and. They're all odd fine. I'll make something happen. I want to draw Unicorn and I will draw. Won't make a Unicorn Happen? The second day of Puck is known as Fair Day. On this day general cattle fairs held hailed go vendors line. The streets musicians perform all day. There was an the twenty nine hundred one there were stiltwalkers and the one that made me the happiest was from that page to look up the welfare of the Puck Damn Ni O. Get the one that got me. The most was Mary poppins on stilts fascinated with really long dress. I hope I know but a gigantic bankable stuff out of they've got music performers. They've got like they've got lake. Puppet shows they had Lee in the tramp. I don't know if it was like a viewing of the movie or late characters out and about lady in the trap were there they have like Minnie and Mickey Show Up Lot. More stiltwalkers roussy a cattle fair. I already talked about. So what kind of fest is it? Disney Ireland is there. Disney Ireland Goes Disney Europe. I don't think there's a Disney in Ireland. No this is just a small town that has like pepe. The pig and ANA and Elsa show up in their probably like the robot knockoffs properly that are filled with Sav Elsa on stilts why does the fascination I guess like reached the level with goat? Maybe I don't know that goat is up real high. And then they end everything with fireworks on the last day. That's good for the goats right. Let's put them up real high and then scared him well. By this time they've let him go so The third and last a package known as scattering day on this day. The goat is removed from his stand in his reign as King. Tuck INS and his return to the wild carry mountain. They shoot fireworks and he is scattered as you rains. Down amongst the crowd terrified goat galloping off they drive them off and back to release them back where they found him and like while they're driving away with him and he's out of reach in the area of range out of rain they start shooting off the signals. Were Alo- It's fine but puck festival their oldest festival dating back over four hundred years and it's all about a goat on a podium and I thought it was fascinating. Could you say it's the goat of festivals I? Could you know what else I could say? Ashley hates me so much right now. I didn't know that I could dislike your puns more than I already do. And then you make them about goes well. Would it? Behoove me to stop thought about that. I felt that it was so short. Siphoned another Irish goat festival wine. There's more than one. Is this one involving. This does not evolve a podium but there is a king crowned so is it the goat again. Yes you know never mind. I'M GONNA keep that thought to myself because we may have listeners. That are Irish now intrigued. But you do however. This is tiffany's fault. I'm not helping the situation. I don't ever help the situation. Why did I do this? They are the ladies. Go straight out so the and again. I'm going to pronounce this way off. Don't worry I don't have too much information on this. There wasn't much to it. Kuu but the bulk I M B O L C Goat Milking Festival. What is an awfully o? F. F. A. L. Y. So this celebrates the beginning of spring. It's one of four Celtic Celtic or Celtic Celtic. I've always had celtic okay. Celtics basketball team. It's one of four Celtic festivals of the season. You can take part in bunch of their traditions. Watch goats of all shapes and sizes being milked and look on. Why would you watch what as the Imbecile Festival Goat is crowned? Children will love the goats. And it's a lovely way to celebrate. Celtics Jerry they actually you know. There's a lot more to people than Celtic people than milking goats. Ado however not during this festival Ma'am yes. Our goal is to travel every place we talk about. We go to Ireland. Now and Ashley can go sit in a pub. Oh that's another thing about the festivals. The pub stay open till three AM instead of two. Pm or two am in kind of irritates the police. But that's one of the benefits of the three day festival. Okay I can hear you tapping on your shoulder. She's not happy. So this is spink hill near Adamstown. There's a group who try to keep an ancient sleeve bloom traditional live and welcome the spring at the beginning of the month. The annual milking of the Goat Festival organized by the Sleeve Lew Bloom Association marks invalid or Emboli which is in the old Celtic years fell on February first and second. It's midway between the solstice and equinox marks the beginning of the return of spring and they enjoy milking we got I do like goat cheese. I don't I don't go. Jeez I don't like milk you do. That's awesome I just feel like I'm looking at the entire time. Who go t's anymore? Well okay so one of the reasons. The tradition behind this is from the one source. I looked up again. This was one that I just wanted to like. Pull out because I felt my short. Why not go festival to this one but it says the goat does the Tradition Katie? Nolan's goats I like you guys but it was meant like when they would go to milk. The COWS PART OF DECISION WAS. That's where the big crowds came together in a designated spot to milk. Cows share news and even start. Courtships that's the importance of milking cows. It's Kinda like the town gossip area. What look your own damn couch? Her Own Damn House people. You don't have to gather your cows to milk them so afterwards utterly ridiculous. It's time to move on. Damn it into Rebecca so after this You can join them for hardy warming soup and refreshments. Plenty of friendly chat and stories prompted by historic accidents of old awfully traditions which this local group deserves a great praise for keeping some of the old ways alive in face of all encompassing modern. Ity WOULDN'T WANNA stop milk in those goats. The quote in here by the author of this article says well it's not his but he quoted Gustav Mahler ince's tradition is not the worship of ashes but the preservation of fire and. I thought that was cute. So yeah there's a another goat festival for you because I know how much you love those. Thanks so much friend. You milk to that one. I did so hope you all enjoyed your Saint Patrick's Day Sirikit and bring you any fun state. Patty Day stuff but you've got goats also quick side aside got me the just like a side note. I found when trying to do research was the Irish port the lowest annual number of your foe sightings in Europe. Just there in that one out there. Anyway they're all too drunk to look up. Lira paid attention to the goats. Maybe that goes back to our goats aliens that's right goats are alien goats on the roof to go like you. Who takes a look over here? But don't mind my friends save me help me. That's my puck fair. Do that was something yours so literally did most of my notes today as you saw before we started recording but I got halfway through and like Oh shit too far and now it's way too late in the game to change plans. Don't worry I know your weaknesses to and we have a multitude of topics left for me to discuss before I finally say fuck it and leave the podcast so pay Exit Beach. It does not. Oh Jeez Rebecca. Do we have any other business things to talk about the relief? Nope okay well. On that note. Remember friends sometimes. Your best friend suck why included in this goat. Oh greatest of all time. I got that reference your word there. Okay remember friends. Everyone has something they find odd and deep-rooted fears from childhood that your friends like to feed upon. Let us tell you why. That's not okay if you have any questions topics you'd like to discuss. Apparently goats are on the table. You can share them with us. At any of our social media links can be found on our website the latest strange dot com or you can email them to us at the latest range at gmail.com. Don't forget to subscribe rate and review. And if you think we're doing a great job and want to support the show you can find us at Patriotair dot com slash. The ladies of strange keep it strangelove lease I.

PUCK Puck Ireland Ashley Ireland rebecca Puck Fair Committee Queen Puck King Puck King Puck US M B O L C Goat Milking Festiva Saint Patrick Daniel O'CONNELL Killorglin Horse Fair Ireland Leah tiffany hockey
GSMC Weird News Podcast Episode 261: War Goats

GSMC Weird News Podcast

1:01:00 hr | 1 year ago

GSMC Weird News Podcast Episode 261: War Goats

"Is Weird odd strange or just plain bizarre is really your cut. Then the golden state media concepts weird news podcast will give you that fix can't believe it will listen for yourself as we deliver his strangest news. You'd definitely you won't find on CNN or it's the golden state media concepts Weird Muse podcast. Thank you for tuning into the GSM. See Weird News podcast brought to you by the GMC podcast network. I'm your host Caleb Hollmann. I hope you all had a wonderful fourth of July filled with many explosions. That didn't harm anyone. Today we will be talking about. A! Test for five goats. As well as some goat war stories. A bevy of Pop Culture figures being used around the entire globe for Corona virus awareness. After that we'll talk about how Poland accidentally invaded the Czech Republic. A few more invasion stories, accidental invasions of course, and then for the final segment. We will go over my top ten God's. Avoiding all controversy as is normal on this show. All right so a woman sues for paternity test on goats. This occurred in Odessa, Florida. Of course, if a good a occur anywhere else, look I don't WanNa. Say anything about the Floridians but. This story sounds ridiculous until you say that it happened in Florida and it. And clarity kind of comes into the picture so this woman named Chris Heads. Storm filed a lawsuit against her neighbor Heather Diner. This was a few months ago and the lawsuit was for. Chris requesting DNA sample from the parents of the goats that she purchased from her neighbor headstone paid diner nine hundred dollars for five Norwegian. Dwarf goats in December doubts. The goats names are Bella GD, Rosie's Zelda and Margat. which kind of Hits close to home. We have a dog named Bella. Favorite Game Zelda and we have a little brother named Margo so. the the story gets kind of personal for me. So, Chris storm. Began this lawsuit because she believes that the goats sold her should be registered. They should be registered goats. and. So for those of you, not in the gold industry, or those of you not living in Florida. Registered, goats have higher values than unregistered goats. Now I know you're wondering. When unregistered goat is so I. I did a little research and. Digging deeper into this led me to the American dairy goat. So I clicked on that website and immediately bookmarked it, and the headline is the most trusted dairy goat registry since nineteen o four. In addition to preserving pedigrees, maintaining heard books and sanctioning dairy goat shows the American dairy goat association has performance programs. That's their. That's their big headline. And then below that it's logging or become a member. Look, winter here to talk about the format of the website year, so let me move on. The add a boasts over two million. The Aga both over two million registered dairy goats over nineteen thousand members, twelve hundred shows yearly goat shows. Let me remind you. And one hundred sixteen years of serving the dairy goat industry now. There is an abstract Sierra mentioning that These yearly goat shows has slowed down ever since Govan started so just just another thing to add to the list of Horrible impacts, Kobe has had on our society. No more goat shows twelve hundred goat shows yearly. That's four per day. people lost their minds. They also boast their youth membership programs as well as their scholarship programs, so if you're struggling to find a scholarship, and you have a goat or two laying around. Why did you hit up eighty G, A and C whereas where they can take you. So basically the the mission. Of. These this goat association is to kind of Organiz and. Ensure the production. and. Preserve the pedigrees of dairy goats. This lady suing another lady because she believes that the goats she bought. Three months ago should have been registered. With the. AD A that's. That's the abbreviated monogram. For the. Look for the Goat Association. So according to the lawsuit, Hedstroem believed that the goats should be registered with the American Dairy Goat Association. She she cited that. That it undervalues the goats that she bought. The fact that they are not registered with the. A. Now the lady who sold the goats, her name is designer She has been selling goats for about ten years, and in fact, typically provides information to our clients to help them register the animals themselves at the ad g. a diner argues that the father go register. But the Tampa Bay Times reports at the A D. G A rejected the application to register the babies because diner is not an active member of the AD A. She never. She never filed her forms properly. Sad turn of events. The lawsuit goes on to say that. The DNA tests would require forty strains of the fodder goat's hair. For the DNA test and the woman suing requested the DNA back in February. Frustrated with these events diner offered a refund of the money in exchange for the goats back she's. She's had enough with the ADA. She doesn't want anything to do with it frankly. Anyway anymore I'm going to delete my membership. Diner goes on to say that she has been being harassed by this purchase. Sir saying that the purchaser called the police on her for three straight months in a row, and even trespassed on her farm. A Hillsborough County Sheriff deputy visited the property at least three times during the spring, and that's where our story comes to a grinding halt. As we wait for this lawsuit to unfold. So this. This story reminds me of another one from a few years ago and I'm not talking about Yoga. You can look that up and I'm not talking about the goat heist of weed, or they went through and ate a bunch of you'd crops and got super high. You can read that story on your own as well. A story I'm GonNa, bring to you is the story of William Windsor. First of all he's a goat is a Kashmir goat and He served as a lance corporal in the first battalion of the Royal Welsh an infantry battalion of the British army. Now William Billy Windsor. At billy because he's a billy goat. He served as a lance corporal from two thousand one until two thousand nine. Except for a three month period in two thousand six, when he was a, he was actually demoted after inappropriate behavior at the queen's official birthday celebrations while deployed on active duty. Eventually diehard. To whipsnade zoo on May two thousand nine. This is where the real juice of the story comes in. So this this William Windsor character. He wasn't the first goat. In the military it's actually a tradition. For the British people. Going all the way back to seventeen seventy five. So you know while while US Americans were writing the most important document known to humanity. the British were enlisting goats into the military. Which frankly I always wondered how they lost the Revolutionary War, but it's starting. It's starting to all come back to me. They say this military craze began when a wild goat walked onto a battlefield in Boston during the American Revolutionary War and he led the wells Welsh regimental colors at the end of the battle of Hill. Now this this goat goes unnamed, but there is another Welsh military goat named Taffy the fourth. which served in the First World War? is part of the Second Battalion Welch Regiment. And officially recorded as the mental goat. A he embarked for the war on thirteen August nineteen fourteen and saw action in the retreat from Mons. Would you be known anything about that? Battle is just an awful battle. Apparently, he's. He was one of the few lucky ones who survived. Can you believe that a goat retreating? must've been a sight. There's this goat went on to be awarded. The nineteen fourteen star, British war medal and the Victory Medal. Can you imagine being one of the? bipedal humans to win a victory medal. On your standing on a podium next to a goat. Your family's clapping and taking pictures for you. Now. Of course IT'S A. It's often cited that they aren't there obviously not used for actual military exercises. it's more of just a publicist thing to make the military appear a little more lighthearted and a little more open to a fun adventure experiences. Whether. You think having a goat on your side. Is something to encourage you to join the military. That's to your interpretation. But. I think I'd be more likely to join if I if I got to meet a goat with a victory medal. Now going back to the mid eighteen hundreds, there is actually a royal goat herd that was presented from the from the czar of Persia. To Queen Victoria. Gift upon her ascension to the throne. Of Herd thrived all the way until two thousand one. When they reached a population of two hundred fifty, and were in danger of running out of food. Following the complaints about goats, wandering into the People's gardens. The council rejected proposals for coal, deciding that the use of a combination of rehoming and birth control. So it sounds like these guys got in contact. With our good friends over at the add. And got the breeding under control. Okay now you remember William Windsor. Well a few years after his tragic death in two thousand nine. the British government came up with a William Windsor the second. So they selected this this goat from litter. and. With some difficulty, the five months old was assigned in army, number, two, five, one, four, two, three, zero one. For me to get through I'm sorry I, apologize but Was, part of the Twenty Third Regiment of foot. And According to this article. He would receive a ration of two cigarettes per day which he does. Eat reportedly every single day. and. He's not allowed to have Guinness until he's older, but you can be in the military. You know that's that's cool, I guess. These stories also remind me of low tech. The Bear that's that's a much more popular story where the. The Polish land forces. Actually trained bear to be part of their military forces that makes a bit more sense than the goats, but. Look I. Think I think we might be slightly straying from the original story. That a Florida woman is suing over the paternity of five goats. But That's that's what we're here for folks. We're here to find some weird news and expand on it. Expand your historical knowledge. And hopefully. You become better people as I know I. Have after reading. This article are at anyway. That's that's it for this segment. Stick around. To the next segment when we will be discussing people dressing up as famous characters in order to convince people to stay home during quarantine, they're telling people to stay home while dressed as darth vader, while dressed as spiderman will get into that and more when we come back for the break, stay tuned. Cow This show built around the women of MMA from the UFC to the extreme cage fighting. We got the fights covered. The golden state media concepts women's MMA podcast, the latest news of upcoming twice discussions of previous matches. Join us as we talked to in about the biggest names in. Mixed martial arts past present and future when it's the women's game, you know to listen to the golden state media concepts women's MMA podcast. Welcome back to the GSM see Weird News podcast. We talked about war. Goats Kinda sad that sections over now we're GONNA. Move on to an assortment of stories where people dress up as famous pop characters popular culture characters. In order to convince people to stay home during quarantine. Later I'll be going over my top ten God. You're not gonNA WANNA miss that, so stay tuned all right. So this this first influencer comes to us from the Philippines and it's actually great what they're doing our year. They're. Addressing a star wars characters. They're getting on a little pinewood boats going down the rivers of the Philippines. You know dressed as darth vader and stormtroopers. And a threatening people. there. They're threatening people's lives saying that they need to stay indoors. Off. By threat of violence by Hey, you know you gotTa do what you gotTa do. But there's there's good news to while they're yelling at people. enforcing the strict quarantine. Measures are also handing out relief packages. Which I? That's just great. That's making the best of a bad situation. Now the Philippines is. They don't have a lot of resources. Should we say? So. He's Darth vader in stormtrooper. Outfits are actually made from rubber mats old plastic. And the youth leaders catch the attention of the villagers who are then reminded to stay indoors. That's that's the idea behind. This is to look as menacing as possible. AS YEAR MIND PEOPLE NOT TO You know to keep six feet of distance. When interviewed one of the storm troopers said. We tell off residents who still go outdoors without the proper quarantine passes needed, and also those who do not wear face masks. We make sure the government guidelines are properly followed. I wish could. But the star wars music in this podcast without being sued. That would go great over that statement, but Of course they aren't taken too seriously, usually a. He says they're greeted with smiles and the villagers often enjoy the distraction from the outbreak itself. In mid may the Philippines recorded nine, thousand, four, hundred and eighty five confirmed corona virus cases. Six, hundred twenty three deaths and one thousand, three hundred fifteen recovery's. So hopefully, odorless will see those numbers diminishing. As, Darth vader keeps scolding the people of the Philippines Really though it's pretty cool that they're handing out relief packages while they do this. Just a nice safety reminder. Right. Let's move onto our next little tidbit. And this tidbit comes from Indonesia. Where volunteers clad as superman and spiderman. Quote sprayed disinfectant against the coronavirus on Indonesia's island of Java flanking colleague, wearing a winged helmet of local superhero got Calcutta. who shouted wear masks wash hands and stay alert. Similar to our last story, they also came prepared with relief packages, handing out masks, containers of hand, sanitizer and bamboo slit drums. While demonstrating how to correctly wash hands. Now, Indonesia has a bit of a bigger problem than the Philippines. Their numbers are eleven, thousand virus cases and eight hundred and forty five deaths. Most of this was due to a sluggish early response from the government. Which is incredibly unfortunate, but thank God. We have Spiderman and Superman to come to help the people. The man who coordinated this event, his name is within Arkell. He said. If the superheroes support the measures, children will definitely obey the orders. which is a I think a very interesting approach to the situation, because it's well known that viruses get spread very quickly by children. That's why when. Shutdown started to happen the first places to be shutdown where schools so by dressing up as superheroes young, a much larger chance of influencing the younger people in society. So. It's a pretty innovative approach to the whole situation. The leader went on to say that he wants to influence the children by quote first washing their hands second, not wandering outside and always wearing a face mask, which is of course, would all the health professionals recommend so if you're not doing those, why don't you do those? It'll be nice. Help out your fellow man and yourself by relation. Now earlier I mentioned that they were handing out bamboo slit drums, which you might be wondering what that is. That's just A. It's a it's basically. it's basically just something that makes a really loud noise, just a bamboo rod, and the reason they're handing. These out is because of all the robbery and thefts. Enacted by criminals who take advantage of the measures against the virus. So that's so. They're basically handing out whistles. For people to avoid getting robbed, which is also fantastic. They don't have much. Of a police force a respondents force, so you gotTa, do what you can and apparently this is helping out. and. This is also a very positive response from the residents in Indonesia. One of them saying usually it's very difficult to ask the children to wear masks. Because for them. It's a hassle. The man went on to say that the caricatures of the superheroes help the children and encourage them to take the virus seriously, which many of them were not doing previously. Due to the late response of the Indonesian government. And to. To kind of further this inspiration, it actually inspired other philanthropists to come out and follow the footsteps of Superman Spiderman. Some more volunteers came out dressed as dead pool. One of almost Black Panther and one of them even dressed. As a Indonesian. Superhero called BIMA X. and. They held up placards that read stay home and get well soon earth. So it's always good to see a positive response to a tragedy, a right time for our third story which? We're going back to Florida for this one and you can immediately tell. This becomes a lot darker of a story. So a Florida attorney dresses like the grim reaper at Jacksonville beach for July fourth weekend. So hitting ISA. He's really on the nose with this one. He's not he's not. Jerking around at all, trying to dress as a superhero, he's going out and saying hey, if you're at the beach, you're GonNa, die maybe. The man's name is Daniel. You'll fielder. And he put on an entire grim reaper costume with skype in everything. And speaking out against quote, the misinformation to warn people about the dangers of covid nineteen. That is his mission. Of course, fourth of July weekend is one of the most popular weekends for Jacksonville Beach Florida. The only exceptions being spring, break and New Year's. This is the first major one of those holidays where people have been allowed on the beach since Covid, so it's kind of interesting to see how people would respond to such an allowance of freedom. Daniel you'll feel the man dressed as the grim reaper, said quote. I talked to some of the millennials in their twenties. Who wanted to talk about why I was doing this why? They may disagree with certain parts of it. I tried to social media campaign I tried suing the governor to close the beaches and do a stay at home order. We have to take this into our own hands. Unfortunately, because our leaders aren't doing the right thing. Now of course the beaches remained open during July fourth, which made him very unhappy. He went on to say. I had a very good discussion with a Lotta people, but then there are some detractors that are just trolls, but they don't bother me. which is good because I'd imagine? If you bother the grim reaper, it would It might not go well for you. He went on to post footage and photos of his grim reaper tour on twitter, and it now has over two thousand four hundred likes. Ninety seven comments and four hundred ninety nine re tweets. Now of course since its opening, Florida has seen a growing trend of positive COVID, nineteen cases with a number surpassing the state's initial peak back in April. Over the past two weeks alone, July second mark the ten th straight day, where the number of reported coronavirus cases was more than five thousand. And as of July third, there were one hundred, seventy, eight, thousand, five, hundred, ninety four cases, three, thousand, six, hundred, eighty four deaths and fifteen, thousand, four, hundred ninety one hospitalizations in the state of Florida. Now, not not satisfied with my you know unquenchable thirst for knowledge. I dug deeper into the story and I watched a short video on it and. It seemed like the guys approach was working. He just wants to open a dialogue on the whole quarantine situation. And that dialogue seem to be occurring on the Jacksonville Beach. Occasionally, he would get somebody who. What a yell at him flipped him off and he even had a few people be escorted from the beach by police because they were harassing him. You know he has a right to do what he's doing on the beach and he has a right to do it without people harassing him whether you disagree with him or not. right onto our fifth little short story. similar to the last one in India, a local artists dressed up as Yom Raj which is essentially the Indian equivalent of the grim reaper. Andy visited various markets of ood hamper city on Friday in order to create awareness about cove in nineteen. He urged people to. Apply social distancing wear masks and not come out of their houses unnecessarily. The man was named Deepak. Kumar and he said quote. It's your duty as well to understand that social distancing is important. People should wear their masks. not very inflammatory, but when you hear it in his own voice, it's a bit more exciting. Let me play a quick a quick little audio clip for you folks. So, that's a little preview of him. Shouting in a Market Square And what he said was Prime Minister Modi has been stating the same thing for your safety. Only Im Yom Raj and I am tired now. Hence I've thought of coming here. Intel people to stay home and not gather in market areas. This emphatic display went on to inspire one of the Indian cops to do the exact same thing he dressed as Yom Rosh, went into his own little town square and started doing the same thing except he had a police car, so he turned his Iran's off. And started shouting exact same phrases. Now. This kind of created a social media frenzy. People were getting sell fees signing off with this cop who kind of became a small celebrity. And so he actually did a really good job at creating awareness as India tried to reopen and his facebook page now has over two thousand shares in over one thousand likes on this one story. In the death toll, due to Krohn virus reached four hundred and eighty on Saturday with the total number of confirmed cases at fourteen, thousand, three, hundred eighty seven This statistic notes though that it's very difficult to measure these Numbers in India when you have such a high condensed population, and frankly you don't have the same resources, most countries have. To test the virus itself, so you have to take these statistics with a grain of salt. But. Hopefully these will inspire the numbers to decrease. Now Right. That's it for this segment. Stay tuned after the commercial and I will be talking about. An accidental invasion Poland invaded the Czech Republic last month. And said that it was a it was a misunderstanding. So, stay tuned, and we will dive into that. Are, you tired of the same Old News. Are you sick of the seemingly endless political spin and negatively the Diaz Mc. America's still beautiful podcast is a weekly news podcast covering all the top positive and uplifting news stories we cover stories that will inspire uplift and remind you love the good in the world tune into golden state media. America's still beautiful podcast to get all the great and positive news stories of today download the NC America's still beautiful podcast on Itunes Stitcher, cloud, Google play or anywhere your podcast just tight GMC in the search bar. Welcome back to. C. Weird News podcast. We just talked about some people dressing up as famous popular culture characters in order to inspire people to stay at home and wear masks and wash hands as they give out care packages, pretty inspiring as we see that nice little Example of people helping people. And we're going to diverge from that for just a second to talk about Poland accidentally invading the Czech Republic. Alright so in cording to London. According to London according to London, the Polish military has admitted to accidentally invading the Czech Republic. But it insists on its brief occupation of a small part of the country as simply a misunderstanding the Polish Polish soldiers mistakenly crossed the country's border with the Czech Republic back in late May before setting up there. They actually built a camp end everything in a country that was not there, so they technically occupied a part of the Czech. Republic. These, soldiers were on duty to guard the border between the Poles and the Czechs during the coronavirus pandemic. It was their job to turn away any checks. Citizens who are attempting to visit a church in Polish Trie. There was a somewhat mass migration. As a a lot of the famous churches in Polish -ociety are visited by Czech citizens on an annual basis, so it's kind of traditional exercise. And these guards were stationed to turn those people around and tell them to go home and stay quarantined. But instead they accidentally kind of took over part of the Czech Republic. in a Snafu lead the Czech Embassy to Warsaw to take quote immediate action. They notified the Polish government and the Polish government has still not formally explained why it mistakenly annexed its neighbor. Now the the Czech Republic had a few statements on the matter. The first of which is our Polish counterparts unofficially assured us that the incident was merely a misunderstanding caused by the Polish military. With no hostile intention. However. Where still expecting a formal statement? The Polish soldiers are no longer present, and our citizens can again visit the site freely. So they actually had citizens of the Czech Republic going to an actual Czech Republic, public site, and being turned away by for. Military Poland's Ministry of Defence finally acknowledged the mistake of brief occupation. Last Friday. Quote the placement of the border post was a result of misunderstanding. Not a double liberate! It was corrected immediately and the case was resolved. He said that him and the Czech side have an understanding of the situation. The incident occurred in pilgrims mile. Which my weekly mispronunciation? The Polish Ministry of Defence went on to explain. Soldiers of the Polish army supported the border guard and protecting the state border after its closure due to the coronavirus pandemic. The operation is led by Armed Forces Armed Forces. Operational Command which is indirect contact with the border guard. So these these aren't just border guards. These are fully armed military men. Now unfortunately, that's kind of the end of that story. Kinda just peters out, but it brings to mind a bunch of past accidental invasions, which we are now going to go over. All right, the first of which is a Nicaraguan military commander. which accidents invaded a Costa Rican border? Due to a Google maps error. So a Nicaraguan commander named Eden Pastora. accidentally took his troops and invaded Costa Rica. He didn't know he was in Costa Rica. He blames that misunderstanding on Google. MAPS. Zang, saying that there was a glitch in the system so anyways he goes into the Costa Rica. Territory finds a Costa Rican flag sees it as treason, tears it down and puts up a Nicaraguan flag. You might be hearing the laugh of my first audience. As Name Has Ryan. We'll have a top ten on Ryan. Someday. This caused a major dispute and the UN. Security Council are being called to mediate the dispute. And they're they're. They're agreeing that. It's Google's fault claiming that. Costa Rica's seeing its dignity smeared, and there is a sense of great national urgency. Now now, here's the twist on the plot. Google actually admitted to its mistake. Saying that an error by up to two point, seven kilometers arose and the compilation of the border source data with the US Department of State. So now they're revising that data and making sure that they get the border of Costa, Rica and Nicaragua accurately as possible to avoid any other invasions. The Geo policy analyst at Google, said quote. Cartography is a complex undertaking and borders are always changing. I have to admit though that I think some of the. Lies with the Nicaraguan military. just just the fact that They're using Google maps for military operations. It seems like an unreliable source for you know. military knowledge. Hopefully they'll. Hopefully they won't be so dependent on Google in the future. Alright time for our next little story where a group of sixty Venezuelan soldiers crossed the border into Columbia and destroyed a banana plantation in a quote, unacceptable violation of national sovereignty. The Venezuelans troops were engaged in routine border patrols the Foreign Minister Deli Rodriguez. said quote in the face of these falsehoods aimed at producing confrontation between fraternal nations. We want to make a point of repudiating the constant. That's in the economic diplomatic political commercial and financial attacks on the on Venezuela by Colombian oligarchy. we are the victims of never ending conspiracies and provocations. Originating, in Columbia and all member in all manner of cross-border crimes that threaten the peace, development and territorial integrity of our nation. So, that's that's his excuse for destroying a banana plantation in order to set up a national flag in their camp. Quite the statement for. What I would consider a fairly minor. Disruption. Of the local area of Colombia. The, Colombian government responded in all their other, typically flamboyant. Controversial statements quote the Venezuelan. Troops are in Colombian territory. That's all that's all they said. They didn't seem a seemed. Go into depth at all about that. But it's it's. It's reassuring to know that the. Colombians are aware of their local news. Now this is the tragic part of the story. The farmer who owns the banana plantation was actually forced to leave. The Governor of Columbia State. Where the troops set up camp, said local residents were further rankled by the site of Venezuelan flag flying on their side of the river. So essentially. The Venezuelans kicked out this banana plantation owner, which is another tragic development in the story. When confronted with the allegations of minutes, wayland military officials, said quote. They moved into the area because they recognized a geospatial demarcation line between the two nations. He said that the river's course had also been altered by the degrading that favored Columbia which. Might not make a whole lot of sense, but the essentially the border between. Venezuela and Colombia is set by a river, and so this military man felt that the river was moving into Venezuelan land and making Columbia bigger in Venezuela's smaller. which gave him the right to go into? Destroy some banana, crops. Right into our final little invasion story. And this one comes from the good old us a and it was the building a Fort Montgomery. which was built in eighteen, forty, four as a stronghold to defend against Canadian invasion. the only problem was it was built in Canada. Fort Montgomery has adopted the name Fort Blunder. Construction have begun for the first Fort Location as an octagonal structure with forty foot high walls. It began an eighteen, Sixteen Berg to protect against an attack from British Canada while President James Monroe visited the incomplete fortification. It was discovered that there was a serving error. And it turns out that the fort was inadvertently built on the Canadian side of the border. which garnered the name Fort, blunder. The fort was actually build three quarters of a mile north of the Canadian American border. Once this was discovered. Construction immediately ceased, and the site was abandoned without any discussion between America and Canada the four, no longer exists, but it said that much of the material was scavenged by the locals on used for their own homes and public buildings. Now here's here's the funny cap of the story. In, nineteen, twenty six, the United States, government actually held an auction to sell. This for which was actually in Canadian territory. Because after after they abandoned it in eighteen sixteen, it garnered a lot of visitors both local and international. For the untold amounts of abandoned lumber, bricks and windows and doors, which you know those those cost a lot of money back then. The abandoned material hanging around people would go and steal some of it. So the American saw this as an opportunity to sell a historical landmark, the eventually auctioned off for a winning bid of five, million, three, hundred and ten dollars. However, the sale was not completed. Twenty, nineteen, the fort and land surrounding. It remain for sale. So the purse. The versions at five million. That's too much for this. This property that actually can't belong to the American government, because it's in Canadian territory. And now there is a there is a big Brouhaha by local preservationists that said the fort should be protected as a historical landmark. Is All. It's time to go to a break. Stay tuned for the break where it will go through my top ten God's. Stay tuned for that. The GMC been happiness podcast takes you on a journey of exploration we'll discuss tried and true methods alongside the latest trends of how to live your life to its fullest and happiest from psychology to meditation science to self help books. The Genus Mc live in happiness podcast. We'll help you to discover what makes you happy and how you can live, live being the best possible download the GMC, life and happiness podcast on Itunes, teacher, soundcloud, play or anywhere you find podcasts. Just tie GMC in the search, bar. Welcome back to emcee weird news podcast. Talked about. Some unintentional misunderstanding, invasions. And now we're GONNA, talk about my top ten God's so You know hopefully this might get a little controversial. Some people might get a little offended. please don't ask your God to smart me. you know if if your God ends up being number three than that's? That's just tough. Luck, Buddy! Let's dive in. Now Look folks I'll be. I'll be honest with you. I'M GONNA. Break this year right now. I haven't prepared this segment at all. All I know is that I'm doing time ten. God's so. I'm going the old the worldwide web. You'll www and search COOLEST God's. All right, so the first fella who came up as Kronos now this is a this is a big beefy, looking character with a nice beard Kinda like myself as a curved. A, frankly very very revealing Toga. which is never a problem when you're looking at your top ten coolest God's. Now it's it's well known amongst Doug God enthusiasts. That a Kronos was the ruling God before the age of the Olympian Deities Cronos proved himself to be the strongest amongst the gods. When he became the ruler by castrating his own father. At a that sounds like a brutal form of Agni Kai if you ask me. Now I don't WanNa I. DON'T WANNA. Raise any eyebrows, but. His father castrated. Uranus. He rated Uranus. Now I for some reason Cronos Scotla got all nervous when he had some kids He named his kids Zeus Poseidon and Aphrodite Eighty. and. In his paranoia. He swallowed them to keep them from ever surpassing him. As you do. But eventually as on mother's wife's do they betrayed him and rescued Zeus, who fought him off and banished him into the dreaded Tartas the underworld. If you've ever read up, Percy Jackson, you know what I'm talking about. All right now it's time to move on so number nine premiered theus the the god of the people. it was one of the most popular Titan Gods. And he's known for being assigned the task of molding mankind out of clay. So if you're wondering where we came from, it's from. Prometheus sandbox? And as all fathers do, he become attached to is the to his offspring mankind. This caused him to cross paths with many other gods who were not fond of humans. Including the mighty Zeus. Who believe it or not did not care for the. So a eventually Zeus got so pissed at the human so peeved as you say. He took fire way from mankind and Prometheus suffolk to steal it back from him and give it back to the humans. Zeus punished him by channing him to Iraq. where an eagle would eat his liver every day. Because of courses litter regenerated as he was immortal. because. Immortal beings require livers. And of course eventually he was freed by Hercules if you've never seen the Disney movie, Hercules, get on that some some historical gold. They're. All right number eight. So. Eight is gone Nisha the God of beginnings now for those who don't know getting. A man with the head of an elephant with multiple arms. So that's that's that's the main reason. He scored number eight on this list. And he's an inspiring character. He's the remover of obstacles, the patron of Arts and Sciences. And the quote diva of intellect and wisdom. I should be my new nickname. I'm the diva of intellect and wisdom. He was always honored at the start of rites and ceremonies, being the God of beginnings. And he's often associated with a human birth, which is great. Of course, he's the God of beginnings. So why would he not be associated with that? All Right? That was nice heartwarming. Time to go to number seven Haiti's. Haiti's was of course God of the underworld. His brothers were Zeus and Poseidon. and His name means the unseen one. Even though everybody eventually sees him and Greek folklore of course. If if you die, you see eighties. Now one of the modern misunderstandings of Hades that. He is a negative character in Greek culture, but actually death is looked upon with a inclination Haiti's is often portrayed as a passive character, rather than an evil won his role is maintaining relative balance rather than creating chaos and hate as he is normally represented in modern media. Modern media. He is known as one as the of as one of the most just God's always holding his subjects equally accountable to his laws, and not much is known about him because the Greeks refrained from giving him much thought to avoid attracting his attention. So yeah, I'm not going to get to in depth, but it's Kinda Fun to know the not so much alternative history, but the left behind history. Of Haiti's the God who often respected by the Greeks not so respected by us. All right time for number six. All right now, this is where I'm going to get into trouble all right. and. It might not be the one you're thinking of. Already in trouble all right number six, Buddha, now of course Buddha. God but kind represents a large. A. Portion of the world's populations religious views so I think it's important that we dive into it and gag I. Give you a nice hot take on Buddha. Now a much like a Jesus Most people have accepted that Buddha did live. It said that he was. Under the reign of the Ruler of the Magda Empire in China and die during the early years of Asoka, cut. I'm cut that. said that Buddha lived actually did live. During five hundred fifty eight BC e to four hundred ninety one B C E. It said that he was the son of a very rich man, and that this rich man kept Buddha from all the sadness and tragedies on earth. He kept him sheltered. He showed him only the richest in the most beautiful people on the planet, and eventually a homeless person slipped through the gates, that Buddha's father set for him, and his little utopia, and Buddha saw the suffering in the world in decided to do something about it. So what he did was he went. knee sat under a tree. is where I'd get in trouble, so he sat under a tree. For he said under it for seven days. Until, he finally reached enlightenment. Five is tie. It's a tie between Zeus and sore, because both of them can shoot lightning. Which I think is pretty cool. It's easy to give for the extra push. Just because he got the movie deal, Zeus just couldn't get it. Just couldn't get the contract signed. But I, I think they both have their own merit. When it comes to a natural, you know Barack power. So stupid right now. Let's move on to number four. Number five is Shiva. The destroyer our second Hindu, God on the list these part of the Hindu Trinity. And he is said to be in his highest form, formless, limitless, transcendent and unchanging the primal soul of the universe. which has if I could have one superpower, it would be that I think I think that'd be a good. He is is considered to be omniscient missions and his nickname. The destroyer comes from the fact that he has the the third is that everybody's always harping about? And if he were to open that third I, it would destroy the entire universe existence itself. Pretty a pretty hardcore stuff from Shiva character. And to top it all off his major sect of Hinduism called. Shave ISM. Funny name so that that really helps them get into the The number four spot there all right now number three's one of my personal favorites and that is. The goddess of victory, who first of all has the coolest title of any of these gods. It's A. Goddess of victory, such a cool name to be assigned at birth. She is of course. A Greek God and she is the daughter of a giant named Polus and the infernal river sticks. So you know a giant and a fiery river get together. And the next thing you know you have a goddess of victory. Pretty interesting upbringing I would imagine. She also had wings, which is a which I think is pretty neat. You know. Most gods are. You know they can shoot lightning or their omnipresent or control the entire universe, but she just she just had wings, and that was all she needed to be the goddess of victory. Now Right. I'd love to talk more about her, but we gotta move on so number two. the. Judean God now I'm Gonna I'M GONNA. Go ahead and do a blanket number to hear. This is God of the Jews God of Christianity. This is Jesus. This is the God of Muhammad. And it's the God of Mormonism. So I'm bundling in all those. All those factions into one nice little package. There as I'm sure they would all love to be. Shoved into. causing problems again. there's not much to while. There is a lot to say about this God. Which is why there's not much to say about this God. He's already pretty well known. You know. He's Omni present us one of the first Monotheistic God one of the first, that was all by himself. But according to books, he seems to get stuff done. You know seems to be a man of action whether it's smiling, the enemies of. Smiling Sodom and Gomorrah or granting Solomon any any wish he wants. You know much much like a genie, so You know if they were to make a movie on this on this God character. They'd probably cast Robin Williams while they would've. Just digging deeper hole for myself. Aren't I okay here? Number One. The let me let me go down my coolest God's list here on Google. Right Number One I'm you love him? God Zillah not much to say about this fellow this character he stumped on Japan a little bit, and then he saved them from giant moth. Pretty Pretty Pretty. Fantastic, God, if you ask me, most people don't know this, but. The name Godzilla actually is a mix of guerrilla and wail. So? Yeah, that's number one. The gorilla whale Bud Zillah. Mafia killer. and. all around. Neat Fella he can shoot laser beams from his mouth. And I don't think any other God can do that so checkmate. Was At for today's podcast I would like to thank you for listening to the GMC. Where News podcast brought to you by the GMC podcast network. I would also like to ask that you. Please remember to subscribe to the show and write a nice got Dang review? It would really help us also if you can. Please follow us on facebook, twitter and instagram. That would be downright swell. Thank. You have a good night. Sister. Bill.

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How AI Helps GOAT Keep Sneakerheads a Step Ahead - Ep. 78

The AI Podcast

32:20 min | 2 years ago

How AI Helps GOAT Keep Sneakerheads a Step Ahead - Ep. 78

"Eager to learn about AI. Then don't miss the premier AI conference. GTC choose from over six hundred sessions on dozens of hot topics get hands on training connect with experts from Google Stanford Amazon, Apple Facebook, epic Microsoft, and my T Pixar city BMW and hundreds more. It all starts March seventeenth at the GPO technology conference in Silicon Valley. GM more GP Utech com dot com. That's GP TEK com dot com. Then save twenty percent on registration with code GM podcasts. That's all caps GM podcast. We'll see you there. Welcome to the Invidia a podcast. I'm your host Noah Kravitz quick note before today's episode if you enjoy the podcast, please subscribe did that sound Ernest enough please subscribe just search for the Invidia AI podcast on cast box apple podcasts or wherever you listen and hit the subscribe button. We'd love your feedback to of course, you can give us a five star review on any or all of those networks. But also, tell us what you think tells who'd he'd like to hear interviewed what topics you'd like us to explore you can drop us a line via Email at podcast at Invidia dot com. All right, then onto today's guest and all of computer science, really runs on data. So let's start today show with some data ninety five billion dollars. That's the projected size of the global athletic, footwear, market sneakers to you and me by the year, twenty twenty-five, according to grand view research. One billion dollars. That's the estimated value of the current resale market for sneakers, according to business insider amongst other sources and finally fifty thousand dollars that's the asking price as of my recording this for the Adidas three D runner men. Size fourteen online sneaker marketplace, goat dot com so much money on the line. It's hardly surprising that a robust fake sneaker industry has sprung up in recent years here to talk sneakers snicker heads and using AI to sniff out fake and stamp out. Frauds is Michael hall director of data at goat group. Go group is a southern California based sneaker marketplace. That's a member of invidious inception program for promising AI startups. Michael, thanks for coming on the Invidia podcast. Thanks for having me. No. So I'll call you, Mike. We're talking off line. I was told to call you, Mike. Of course, I called you Michael three times ready because that's how I roll. Let's start the stage here for the uninitiated. What's the sneaker head, and when and how did sneakers become such big business? And then final is three party to get you going. Why is the resale market in particular worth so much right now it accurate Weston's? Just start on a sneaker head is what we usually affectionately called someone obsessed with niggers. They are core users of the app, and they appreciate not just the aesthetic values knickers. But also their monetary value. I cherry pick. You know, I went onto go dot com. As you mentioned, there's also an app by one hundred dot com, and searched, you know, price Haina low, and so I picked out, you know, the fifty thousand dollar Adidas, which is maybe an anomaly, but sneakers on yours and other recent marketplace's routinely go into the high three and four figures. Right. Yeah. I I mean, I was flabbergasted when I got to go at how big this market is. I would consider myself a sneaker head now, but less so when I joined I had. Maybe two pairs of sneakers one of which was the Jordan one. And the other one was the much lesser known on super. And when I got here inside that we had over twelve million users buying and selling over thirty five thousand different styles of sneakers and the company has now grown over five hundred employees on both coasts and we've raised over one hundred million dollars in BC funding to continue the mission of the company this all of his staggered now. Like, you a little bit of a I'm sure less than you kind of an amateur sneaker head or I've always been a fan, but I've never built out of collection or anything. But I also had a pair of Jordan ones back in the day. Really ended up followed them, but like how did this blow up so big, you know, obviously, we gotta talk about Yee's. But is it just that you know, when people start collecting that kind of creates a marketplace and feels the desire or what what happened. I think we should take it back to two different time periods. The first one is really. The nineteen eighties with Jordan one, right? Jordan completely turn the sneaker rolled on its head. When he first introduced, the Jordan one, and he already got had started can create us mythos around sneakers with that he wasn't allowed to wear on the court because it didn't have the right colors for the NBA regulations. And really started marketing these high higher end sneakers, but really the modern snigger high with you fast for the two thousand five started with the oxygen dunks of these are the just stable shoes that people lined up for days outside of his shop for and where the actual the police actually had to be called in to break up in fighting a line people were bringing weapons it was it was enthusiasm for the sneakers was so extreme that people from all walks of life. We're willing to spend essentially there, the legal liability of their futures. Acquire them. And then yet thought sports now and look at specifically probably to the bigger brands at the moment tiny west yeezy line, which is our butter at. As well as Nike's recent reinfection, Virgil outlow and the off white brand the scarcity mixed with just the aesthetic beauty of the sneakers really as a draw for people to spend their disposable income in more. Is it the scarcity? I assume that these designer collaborations off whites in the pigeons, there's a new pigeon that that's just coming out. Now. Right there reupped it. Yeah. They did. And it's hard to compare height between twenty nineteen in two thousand five, but it's a it's a hotly desired sneaker. I think it's a beautiful snicker. Yeah. It's cool. But I promise I won't get off track talking about this knickers themselves. You know, I I assume and you mentioned scarcity these are kind of limited edition runs, which is kinda what sets up this market place for the scarcity driving the resale potential, absolutely and scarcity is half a bit. But also due to the popularity of these shoes Nike and Adidas and other brands of relief focused on his retro restock. So that people can. Get again, the shoes that Michael Jordan was talking about in the earth showing off in the nineteen eighties that they remember maybe had as as kids you can get them again with slight variants. So that you can really by that Moustapha that brought you back to when you first cantered the parents need that you cared about. And I mean, honestly, how the company started in. We're now the the world's largest marketplace for buying selling sneakers and the impetus for the company in the first place was our our co founder Daishin he had a pair of Jordan five breaks when he was a kid, and he'd been in the sneakers when he came up with the idea for the company for probably twenty five years. And so he will he decided he wanted to recapture those Jordan five grapes that he'd had as a kid. And when online went to the biggest marketplace for sneakers at the time, which was EBay and was amazed that helmeted different offerings. There were on EBay of just this one skew. Oh in his size turns out that that was actually dangerous. He between all of them try to suss out which ones we're real ones or fake, which is a pretty common story a few years ago and finally decided unwanted now purchased it and received shoe when he got the shoe it turns out, it was completely phased. The stitching was wrong. The jump man logo is off. It didn't even smell like a actually shoot you laugh. But that's that can be a big talent. You know out is Pacific smell. No, I've been there actually had a similar experience with the air max ninety five Neons and I bought a pair off EBay got them. And yeah, they were nothing there were they were felt they were nothing like the originals. So let's get into that. How does how does group work? What is your website actually do? Yes. So we started in twenty fifteen and we have the mission to to solve the problem of counterfeit sneakers in the marketplace, these are high and luxury items that people. Care about the company in a nutshell basic model as we hide near this ship to verify model, we have a marketplace. We have buyers we have sellers once the buyer decides on the shoe, they wanna buy we consider them matched up and the seller sends us the shoe in the buyer gives us the money at once we received that shoe it goes through very rigorous authentication process. We have manual caters who get the shoe in their hands, and these are domain experts. These are people can tell you thirty plus years worth of Jordan's. What exactly the stitching on one Jordan eleven should look like between the patent leather in the regular leather, and the sole of shoe, the every single detail these shoes, and these are again for that initiated, you know, this isn't just the like we joked about like, I ordered a leather shoe when I got was made at a cheap fell to smell, right? These are like fine details that might be lost on the average consumer. But for the connoisseur. Collector? This is where the devil is in these details. Absolutely. I mean Nike now at this point is the most counterfeited brand world over ten percent of the sneakers that are sold. Online are counterfeits. You know, as you said that they're very very very close to the real thing. And you know, one of the things that I found out when I got here on maybe I'm jumping ahead is that when we started trying to tackle this this automated occasion problem. It turns out that a lot of these sneakers are actually made in the exact same places with the exact same materials as the real sniggers. Right. Yeah. Get into that a little bit. I saw online documentary about this and went down a little bit of a rabbit hole myself. But but for the listeners how does that happen? You know, we have to piece that together ourselves. We obviously can't be on the warehouse floor when these are made sure, but what we can say definitively is that a lot of the approaches that we initially wanted to say that when I came in, you know, I came into this company with a pretty strong hubris actually thinking that I'd be able to come up with some kind of magic wand that these caters could point at the shoes and beep, boop. It's real it's fake. I had a lot of things I wanted to try. Almost all of them immediately bail, including microscopic pictures of the materials like cereals are the same in a lot of cases dimension size. Wave all of these features that we needed to start collecting because no one had this data. So to get an idea of the scale of the problem here, you mentioned twelve million users. You know, how many pairs of shoes are you guys authenticating or kind of getting in holding an escrow and shipping out to buyers on a daily monthly yearly basis? Yeah, we actually can't share that. That's not Lubbock information at this point fair enough. Okay. That's fine. But enough that there's a problem to be dealt with. Absolutely. You know from personal experience. One of the first shoes I bought when I got the company we have the benefit of actually being able to go pick up our shoes at the warehouse ourselves after that it authenticating them, and I was anti-smoking this pretty strongly. It was one of one of my shoes. I'd always wanted one top three. And I got the Email. The day. It was here that they were fake shoes. And is actually helps pretty significantly 'cause the shoes that we were using two tests. The authentication process words or ones at that point. And so we are actually hunting for fake Jordan, once we're actually crush me personally, give give one to the team. So understanding, you know, and and for the listener, hopefully, the stages center this big business. This is shoes. And it's fun. And it's in the style jacomb or laughing we're talking about it. But there's a lot on the line here. Money-wise let alone for the collector like you just said your your first pair turn out buffet, and it was kinda crushing. So a lot on the line monetarily and emotionally personally here. So understandable. You gotta keep some secrets close to the vest. But how did you start using a I to try to solve the problem? Yeah. I mean machine learning and is not new to the marketplace community, right? These are problems that are. Sometimes really well researched and sometimes not a similar breadth of problems as other marketplaces. This in includes recommendations discovery automating work in operation slows discovering fraud of buyers and sellers that added problem of authentication of the shoes. And so it be really affect the streamlined process for the user at at every single step in the in the user flow. Right. You can picture the top of the funnel where we're trying to get people to be aware of goat and get them on the platform. We help with marketing placement at attribution and testing in that you can picture the the seller. Now that we have as many shoes as we have coming in to be listed on the platform, content moderation actually becomes a significant problem and not that we were quick to deal with four. So there's a lot of work there to be done around kind of hot dog. Hotdog stugotzs vacation with we can train models, regardless of whether it's offense or fake shoe to at least be able to identify skew right than we can bypass some of that manual content moderation in favor of automated and then on the on the buyer side. Right. You have the normal discovery personalization problems that you have on marketplace. That's recommendations is becoming an increasing problem. We have we have unique audience at goat sneaker heads will be the first to tell you that they know exactly what they want to come on our site. Yes. Indeed outlets. They're not coming in to to be introduced to some sneaker. They didn't exist. They know what's out there. And they know on for the record. I want the undercover X Nike react eighty seven. I don't just want the straight Nike. I want the undercover Persian. Of course, you know, weekend table that talk about outside prevent. So so these users know exactly what they want when they come on the site. But as we grow we need to open this up to users that maybe newer to the sneaker community and so- recommendations discovery is becoming an increasing problem better. So that we can really expose them to the breath of sneakers that are on our platform that they may be interested in and then on top of that you add the normal of more normal. Marketplace problems like credit card fraud in charge backs shipping, routing inventory management once we merged with flight club. We've learned a lot from their consignment model. And we now have a massive inventory of sneakers in our warehouses already pre authenticated ready to be sent out to users and so- inventory management between the flight clip stores themselves the goat, warehouses and any cold storage. We may have it becomes an increasing problem and an increase in cost of that leads us finally to the authentication problem, which is. I think probably the most interesting problem that we have to deal with and unique problem we're talking to Mike Hall. Mike is the director of data for goat group. Goat group is an online marketplace for buying and reselling sneakers as Mike mentioned the recently acquired flight club, a boutique sneaker shop that I'm probably gonna be wrong here. But started in New York City is that right? It did. Yeah. We still have a flagship store on on Broadway. Excellent. I'm miss those days. But not in in January. I'm glad to be out here in California. And you guys are also California down south in Culver city. Yes. So let's back up a little bit because you mentioned being a little bit of a fledgling sneaker head when you got to go. What were you doing before goat? And how did you get into computer science machine learning and all that good stuff? Yeah. I come from a family of computer scientists. And there was really no doubt that I was going to go into computers myself. You know, I finished most of my grad work at UCLA about ten years ago ten years ago now to nine, and, you know, it was an amazing environment to be there with a greats like rigid corporate finance Darwich, these people that really from the eighties on made major contributions as soon as I left there. I jumped into my startup that led to a series of startups. Around ad tech. And then I moved into consumer apps which eventually landed at Tinder at Tinder, I led the early recommendations team. So we decided on the set of people to put in front of users for them slide bomb, right? And when I got there like I said, it was very earthy attender when I got there it was slightly better than random, and we made huge advances in both getting users that were already doing okay on the platform more matches. And then also trying to increase the number of use of users. They got at least one match everyday, right? We wanted to make sure that not only users that were already doing okay were thing more successful. But also that we could spend some of that success across the entire user base goal. There is a side note. I may steal slightly better than random as the title for my autobiography forever right on. So I just wanna Mark that here on the record as long as okay with putting on my great sound too. I think that works. It's cool. And so two years ago, I transitioned over to go I was the first state a higher here. They wanted me to higher up the team to solve in kind of all the data science related problems as well as didn't engineering Olympics the rest, and so I met with the compounders here really appreciated what they were doing I really appreciated their love for the product for sneakers, but also just their desire to protect consumers can create that streamlined process for the users that were used to ridiculously chaotic fraud. Ryan defy nothing sneakers on. So let's talk a little bit more about the authentication problem with sneaker. So you spoke about the problem indicating sneakers and just how many different sort of variations there are that come, you know, these different factors that way into how the the fakes. Now are so close to the real thing. But they're not quite again without divulging any trade secrets how are you going about the problem solving that problem in finding success? Yeah. So one of the benefits of the failures is that we now have the biggest set as far as we know the biggest set of catcher data on authentic sneakers that anyone has we've been collecting data including photos from every possible angle of both the sneaker and the box. It comes in dimensions. Wade who's touched it at every single step of the process. We have all of this information. It's really helped. But one of the things that makes this problem, especially hard is the imbalance between. The classes of in authentic authentic sneakers. We have tons and tons of tons of examples of authentic sneakers. Ryan wisdom every day that goes through our house in that covers the majority of skews in our warehouse. However, even with some of the more honor fitted brands, people have stopped sending us in authentic sneakers. They stop sending us base because they know how good entering them. Right. Right. And so we want to capture eggs enough of ground truth set for that big class were not able to get enough samples to properly train a classic fire. So we really had to start going to more of an outlier detection unsupervised learning approach and we've really utilized kind of human in the loop machine learning, Brian so focusing less on that magic wand to be able to say whether something's not to ended yen in peeling off traffic from the offense caters. So that they know what our probability is that the. Shoe is authentic. So they can go through a different set of steps for shoes that we see very frequently. And we have a very good sense in automatic condensation. Whether they're real or not and really spend the Georgie of their time on the ones that we spent our offense. Right, right. It's fascinating you've gotten so good at the first, you know, the last mile problem in a way, right? You've gotten so good at getting up to whatever percent that then getting that last percentage is more difficult but in part because the fraudsters know, not to mess with you. So we adds definitely declining turns but still working hard on the problem. So what what is the or what are some of the most faked sneakers on the market right now, Jordan elevens, I think are the number one fakes shoe on the market right in a particular color way, or just all them, all color ways. But obviously we the face tend to come in maybe two three months after the initial. Release. Ronald right sometimes they're headed their game. Sometimes if it's not hyped enough release. It will pop until later, we'll see the inauthentic sneakers once the hype level grows. And for the first one is inspired by this podcast. They're looking at go right now with their credit card in hand. What's good a good starting sneaker for the fledgling sneaker head while that's that's kind of a personal question. Sure. I think that my favorite can starter shoes for my friends for myself. Our Airmax ninety seven's ardor to got you know, it's not super chump gay. It's pretty sleek. It's got the nice curves on the outside. It's got infinite color ways. So you can always find something that you're interested in. I mentioned before the Tigers that was actually meant that. I bought host starting at goat was the original blue red and white collar way, I can see it in my head. It's their their sniggers. Across inches on them are fantastic. And then obviously if you want to jump into the slightly more hype than Jordan, Juan highs and lows are good place to start because again ton of color, ways and instantly recognisable by anyone who seen a sneaker or the new Spiderman movie as gonna say, my older son has a poster in his room right now of Spider-Man Rockin, the the OG color ways of the one so is frustrated to no end that I won't stop mentioning Jordan ones whenever we talk about spider man now. Also, frustrated at our finances now that I have addiction sneakers, I think Mike Lynch over forty now and is prominently displayed inside of our bedroom. So how many of those do you wear? I would say I rotate through about twenty five. Okay. And are there some that are just purely collect your kind of investment or or collectors items that are what's the kids still say on ice or debts dot is? Yeah. I think my my two favorites that I were very infrequently are my Sean Witherspoon Airmax ninety seven ones was designed by a greater here in Los Angeles who won a contest to be able to create a shoe with with Nike or nice beautiful. They're made out of quarter, ROY love them. And then the other ones are the Jordan wanted backwards. It's the the orange color way of Jordan ones and their way outside of my price range, but I did some off hours worked buying and selling sneakers myself to actually. So with enough goat funds to be able to purchase it without bringing our budget. I don't wanna get you in trouble with the feds. But is that insider trading comment? I hope not. And you know, it's it's nice. We released a product this year called instant ship. Which is kind of what I was mentioning are consigned brought us, and what's extremely helpful. As is anything that you buy on goat? You can actually put in call story. So we'll just hang onto the shoe. It's already authenticated. And then you can either keep it there until you wanna bring it out and wear it or you can resell it, and it can be shipped out immediately instead of having to wait for the ship to verify model. Right, right. That's actually helps everyone be able to turn over these shoes. Faster. If your goal is to make money in we've seen maze. I kind of picture these nica reseller before I knew better as kids they were making a little extra money to buy sneakers, sell but couldn't afford. Or individuals. But some people are building many enterprises on our platform, right? Our top sellers have sold. I think they sold last year more than a are very very top sellers. Individually sold more than two million dollars of sneakers while those same top sellers sold more than collectively as as much as ten million dollars. Which is just staggering to me. No, it really is my son, and I are both big Kendrick Lamar fans last year the tour of his his label TD, I'm saying this more for the listeners than treating about this, Mike. But his there the championship tour rolled through Oakland. And it was sponsored or he sponsored whatever the official relationship is by Nike. And so they had a pop up shop in Oakland with some limited edition Nike merchandise for the tour at I went down and waited in line to get him a hoodie and was standing in line next to somebody who works at a sneaker boutique in San Francisco, and so we at the talking about it, and that that gave me a. Very brief glimpse, which we know that and then they had the Nike app. Our city didn't qualify there were stops on the tour where like during the concert push notification went out to the app that like you can buy the Kendrick shoe right now. And now, it's just kinda, you know, my moment what you're talking about of like, this is big industry. You know, this is this is serious serious stuff on the line here. Last question for I let you go and again apologies to the data scientists out there, but it's just negro question. No, I'll follow up with one more industry question. But the new released believes are called the Nike adapt. BB the self lacing shoes give a take on this. I haven't held them in my hands yet. So it's hard for me to give a personal opinion. But the hype is growing around the birth for sure so purely as an investor might I want to try to get a pair and put them into storage. I would not do away from that very well worded answer. So looking ahead here, whatever you can speak to whether it's goat or the industry at large or just the problem of the diminishing returns of authentication around fake goods, where do you see all of this headed, you know, the work that you're doing and and we're goats going in the industry, how is machine learning and the related technologies can play a part in this. You know? Five years down the line or further out. I mean, I can I can't dig straight into our roadmap. But I can say go discovery personalization is huge on our radar as I said, we're trying to welcome people who are new to the snigger community. And maybe don't know exactly what what they want and wishing learnings at the core of discovery personalization. And really making sure that what you're showing the right shoes. So the right people and my team is going to tackle a big portion of that with the wrestler engineering team at broadcasts and then on top of that. I mean, just really global expansion right with like I said over twelve million users, but a big Porsche that are in the US were trying to broaden the market side of the US, and and continue to get sicker heads to use platform as much as we can provide great services for them. But really we have a lot of fans outside of the US that we have an servicing while inside of the the US. So we'd like to put a focus. On international pretty strongly. And specifically, you know, China's a massive market for us, Australia, the UK these are markets that people are spending quite a bit of money to be able to use our platform on top of the money. They're already spending on our platform. Want to provide a better service for that moving or excellent anything that support sneaker heads? I'm all for Mike call. Thank you so much for for taking the time to talk with us. Obviously, go dot com is the website. You mentioned an app you mentioned flight club. If people wanna check out the sneakers that are for sale or possibly learn a little bit more about the work, you're doing where should they go? Look I would recommend if you're in Los Angeles, New York or Miami go to like lift stores in those three cities. You don't get your hands on the shoes. Turn it around. Look at the quality look at the stitching with the colors. Would you like look at the things that no one can get their hands on that are in the kind of lockdown cases. We're wanting to release. No. And then beyond that download the app browse were trying to improve as I said discovering personalization every day. And there's something for everyone on the excellent. The best of luck team Mike and again, thanks for coming on the podcast. Thanks so much. Eager to learn about AI. Don't miss the premier conference. GTC choose from over six hundred sessions on dozens of hot topics get hands on training connect with experts from Google Stanford Amazon. Apple Facebook, epic Microsoft, MIT, Pixar city, BMW and hundreds more. It all starts March seventeenth GPO technology conference in Silicon Valley. To learn more, go to GP Utech com dot com. That's GP tech com dot com, then save twenty percent on registration with code GM podcasts. That's all caps GM podcast. We'll see you there.

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Part One: The Goat Testicle Implanting Doctor Who Invented Talk Radio

Behind the Bastards

1:11:10 hr | 2 years ago

Part One: The Goat Testicle Implanting Doctor Who Invented Talk Radio

"Hey, everybody, I'm Robert Evans host of behind the bastards, and more importantly, host of two shows that are produced by Sophie Letterman, a lot of, you know, her from her laughing in the background of various podcasts. When I when I say something dumb, and occasionally assaulting with bagels will Sophie's producing a new podcast for I heart radio. And it also stars. Chelsea handler. Chelsea handler is, of course, a star of the stage and screen TV and net flicks. She's got a new memoir called life will be the death of me and she's got a podcast out produced by Sophie called life will be the death of me. It features interviews between the comedian and her inner circle of friends recorded live in some cases, from her sit down comedy tour guests on the comedic podcast will include prominent TV and film personalities as well as news anchors people like Connie Britton, Sarah Silverman, journalist Jake tapper, Frankie Shaw, and also, a special guest appearance by Chelsea's therapist, so checkout life will be the death of me with Chelsea handler brand. New I heart radio original podcast produced by Sophie listened. Subscribe at apple podcasts or on the iheartradio app or wherever your pods get casted. Lubin my slip and slides. I'm Robert Evans. Does behind the vaster show where every week, I talk about a new terrible person, and try new terrible introduction to try and get a reaction from my guests. Caitlyn. Durante. How are you? How are you feeling about that one up? You're slipping slide is that what you said that was the intro. Yeah. Well, I would I liked it to me, whoever's looping up your slip and slide is a good person because he want your slip and slide nice and lube though. Yeah. They're always you'll get some real bad tears. Yeah. You don't want those tears, those slip inside tears. So you're going to want that lube and personal wanna know who is doing it. Okay. So you're asking me who lubes my slip? I'd say it's more like a like a question I'm asking the universe. I always see, aren't we all wondering on some level. What's looming are slip and slides. I wanna tell you specifically. Early who is losing my slip and slide though just kidding. But it is nNcholas whole star of, you know, movies Mad Max. Yup. Tolkien which I won't see actually I will. Anyway, that's know way. Nncholas Holt is looming. All of our slip and slides. I think that's beyond a doubt. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. I'm not wrong so Caitlyn. I've already introduced you by name, but you want to plug some plug levels before we get into the episode today. I'd love to I'm a comedian, I am the co host of the Bechtel cast, which is another podcast, right here on this Dr network and yeah, that's about it. And you were with me to talk about L Ron Hubbard last year. Yes. Very good time talking about that love. Now we're talking about a different but almost is ambitious. Griff griffin. Oh, I love the embarrass ones. Oh, yeah. Yeah. This guy this guy. Motherfucking ambition coming out the Oiseaux slip and slide fed over doubt. Yeah, if ambition was a slip and slide this guy would be Lubin that slip and slide up like you would not believe right on right on. Have you ever heard of John Brinkley? I have not. Have you ever heard of goat testicles, just as a general thing as a concept that exists familiar with testicles and goats and by proxy? I'm familiar with the idea that goats would have testicle some of them now in I understand, you're not gonna have an exact number here Caitlyn. But would you venture to guess how many times you've heard the phrase goat testicles in your life up to this point, not counting the two times? I brought it up so far I would say, like exactly that phrase or even just like variation on like goat balls. Any sort of yet direct reference to the to the testicular glands of a goat. Honestly, it's more than you think because if memory serves goats have enormous testicles in relation to their. So I feel like I've been to, like, different petting zoos, and people have commented on kgo ball. So I feel like I've heard some variation on it. Maybe like ten times throughout my life, ten times. Yeah. If that's the case, then I suspect for you in for most of our listeners, you are about to hear the phrase goat testicles more than you've ever heard it before in your entire life rate. Yeah. I'm very excited for this John Romulus Brinkley came into this world on July eighth in the year of our Lord, eighteen eighty five his father, John, Richard Brinkley was a former medic in the confederate army his mother, Sarah net was the niece of his, dad's fourth wife, which is chain of parentage that is best, not contemplated, too deeply when John was five his mother died. His father died when he was ten and John was raised by his aunt Sally, he grew up in Jackson county, North Carolina seems to have been a rather ambitious child. He recalled later that he grew up dreaming of John Brinkley freeing the slaves. John Brinkley illuminating the. World. John Brinkley facing an assassin's bullet for the sake of his people. John Brinkley healing the sick. Can I saw right there? Yes, I'm sorry. His middle name is Romulus. Okay. That like the guy who killed his brother to make Rome. Right. Okay. For some reason, I am like oh, that's a Star Trek. I don't know enough about street, as you can tell it's possible that they were just intimidating a star Trek's second or third best villain species, but more likely it was a reference to Roman with Allah Judy. Okay. I, I suppose that tracks right? Yeah. I would I would say that's more likely. Okay. His neighbors recall him being, quote, kind of a reckless like, boy, who was lively as a cricket, because again, it was old time, days and people said shit like lively as cricket. Yeah. John's education was not up to snuff with his ambitions by the age of sixteen. He'd been forced to leave school and get a job. He worked first. A mailman and then as a telegraph operator this job moved him to New York and New Jersey. It seemed like he was on the path for a decent middle class life. But then at age twenty one his aunt, mom Sally died, and he was forced to return to Jackson county to settle her affairs. Well. On mom, right? Yeah. I mean is on? Oh, okay. I'm on mom. Okay. I'm still a little confused on who the parents, relatives are. Yeah. In like, which how much incest did happen, but it's confusing because his actual mom is the niece of his dad's wife. His dad's ex wife, which I think makes his real mom his aunt mom too. So right confusing. Yes, yeah. I'm not gonna try to understand it. It's, it's best not to try to parse that deeply. Yeah. Okay now. Well he was back in Jackson county dealing with his aunt, my second on mom's funeral. He met an Old Firm from school named Sally Wilk now that they were both mature adults. They started vibe off one another and then fucking and then one month after aunt sallies death. They got married wife. Sally understood her husband's unrequited ambition to get into medicine. She told him that he didn't need to waste a bunch of time in medical school to become a doctor agree. This was true. Yeah, yeah. The in the late eighteen ninety s every state government saved three in the United States had repealed licensing laws for doctors, this was due to a populist movement, that had swept the country against the idea of high falutin educations and licenses things that we're seeing this taking power from the common man though, in many people felt why. Shouldn't anyone be able to declare themselves a doctor for any reason? That's, that's sort of where things were in the late night, you're down with that. I'm Don without too much education out there. Let's scale it back. I'm having a bunch of hats printed up right now. That just say make every American doctor again. That'll that'll that'll deal with the problem of not enough, good jobs in the student loan problem. It's really like a, a silver bullet for a couple of like our healthcare crisis, our debt crisis. Just make everybody doctor. Right. I, I have so much student loan debt, and I need so much medical attention. And I don't know what to do about any of it will in Keighley. If you I don't know how much student loan debt you have. But if you look at whatever that number is. And then declare yourself, doctor, I'm going to bet it seems a lot more reasonable. That's true. Because if I have the income of a doctor that, you know, seventy thousand dollars. Uh-huh. Stats pocket change. For Dr that's often. Yeah. Shitty doctor will make twice that here. Yes, this is a solid plan. Yes. Any? At around this point, late eighteen ninety s a teacher named lamelo Shattuck was asked by the Massachusetts state legislature to carry out a survey of the state sanitary and medical facilities during this period. His summary of the state of Massachusetts sanitary facilities is pretty accurate. I sort of the state of, of medical education, and most of the US at the time, quote, anyone male or female learned, or ignorant and honest, manner in nave can assume the name of physician and practice upon anyone to cure or to kill as either may happen without accountability. It's a free country. Wait to cure, or to kill. Yes. Okay. So doctors are response should be killing people is what they're saying doctor shouldn't be held to a high standard of not killing people. They should be able to do whatever they want, because anyone should be a doctor. Yes, this is this is a real thing that was popular line of thought in America at the time. Good. Okay. Now John Brinkley. Pretty presently with his, his new wife advice, became, Dr John Brinkley, now, this was not. He was not a doctor, obviously any like licensed since of the word short, but he started traveling around and acting as what was known as a Quaker doctor, this was sort of a medium in America at this point. And I'm going to quote from the book charlatan by pope Brock to explain what exactly was going on there, quote. There was a set pattern to most Quaker doctor shows first fiddler or a dancer, got the crowd warmed up a short morality play followed in which noble head of house, or ringleted female died pathetically for lack of a miracle tonic identified by name. Finally, the physician himself Brinkley shot on stage in a dinner, plate hat cut away coat and pious pants that buttoned up the sides. The ING endowing singing and selling waving a bottle of Eire's cathartic pills, or maybe burdock blood bidders around Fanis, worm candy. One thing was for sure whatever it was cured whatever you had. Okay. Wait. See you've got a warmup comic. You've got to feed and you've got a headliner. Okay, headliner is pretending to be a Quaker doctor who sells you a nonsense medicine and no matter what you have an, no matter what's being hawked at the people it works. And it's a cure all, I mean, that's an okay. I like that. I like that. They pretty much. You know, just I mean, this is a standup show. And again, it'd be a hack it's shit. But. It's going to people are gonna love it sounds. And it's one of those things where like back in back in those days, there wasn't TV. There wasn't even radio. There was fucking nothing to do for most people. So, like some fake doctor comes to town and puts on a show, maybe you by his pills, just because it's a distraction. I mean he's, he's selling merge. He's like, here's my show March. Here's merge that you saw in the show. I mean, brilliant, good. Good business plan. I love AS solid branding. Yeah. Now this was obviously what we would call snake oil. Selling Brinkley was a snake oil salesman. Have you ever wondered where the term snake oil comes from Caitlyn? Well, I haven't wondered that only because I'm not I don't know if I've ever heard that before if I have like I make oil yet I don't know again. I don't know what Romulus is. And I don't know what snake oil is. I'm an idiot. Well, snake wheel salesman is a common term for like somebody who sells bogus like people call Alex Jones, a snake oil salesman. His brain bills that are fill Fulla lead. Stuff and the term came was coined the eighteen ninety three Chicago world's fair, which was would have been when Brinkley was about eight years old. And it came when a man wearing a cowboy costume got onstage and started strangling. Dozens of rattlesnakes to death and collecting the liquid that used out of them and selling it as a medicine. Yeah. Yeah. So that's, that's literally where the term snake oil salesman comes from. I mean, it's, it's a very literal. Craze demands strangle, and snakes, and getting the oil from the stakes in, in, in terms of our previous conversation about like the shows is entertainment. I would absolutely watch a man dressed as a fucking cowboy strangling snakes on stand collect whether or not fit. Yeah. That's a show. Hell, yeah. Yes. Kind of want to see patent Oswald do that. Right. Why, why isn't Kevin Hart my favorite? Comed-. JK. Strangling? Snakes on stage will in the great thing about most stand up comedians is that I wouldn't really care, if they are the snakes one like either way, I'm going to get a good show. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Well, most top, right? Most comedians probably should get bitten a little bit by a couple of including me. I, I need to, you know, to get in check I need to be bitten by a snake now. Caitlin. How many rattlesnakes do you think you could throttle? If you if you if your career was on the line. Sophie, is helping me out. And saying four I. That's a pretty good number of snakes. Yeah. I think so. Yeah, yeah, that's solid. I think Sophie has a lot of confidence in you. Thank you, so fi, or at least in your wrists, because if I understand it throttling rattlesnakes is, is really risked work than anything, a very firm grip. I think. Yeah. So I've, I've noticed that. That's a big thing about me. So for months, Sally and John Brinkley toured around pretending to be a Quaker doctor and his wife selling nonsense medicine from a wagon this worked for awhile, but it eventually turned out that he and Sally didn't really like one another. They split up not even bothering to divorce and he headed off to pursue his medical ambitions in a more serious fashion. He enrolled at the Bennett Medical College of Chicago, and then the eclectic Medical University of Kansas City, so we don't decide to go to medical school. Well, so you went to he went to things that, were that had names that made them sound like medicals case Caitlyn. So these aren't accredited universities. These are in no way, accredit name. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And he didn't get full degrees from these non accredited universities. Anyway, he got a twenty five dollar loan from a loan shark that he never managed to repay eventually he skipped town before finishing school. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He did get like a sort of undergraduate certification. I guess you'd call it. But again, it was unin credit now in a little bit of fairness to John Brinkley at this point in time in history medicine wasn't really a thing in the way it is today, so eclectic medicine is what we'd call like naturopathy. Now. It's using like herbs and poultices and like waving sticks around and chanting and stuff like it, incurred all of that stuff. But this was nineteen. Oh, eight. So like the real doctors were pouring mercury and people and bleeding them to death. Yes. So there were actually situations in which a doctor with Brinkley's training would probably do better, work on you than a real doctor, because a collective doctors didn't bleed people are feed the mercury. So. It's there, he's going to be beyond the point of being fair to at a certain point. But, but up to this state like he's not necessarily a hack in a frost hit us in is kind of nonsense. So him being a bad doctor actually makes him a better doctor than the real doctors like him being fake is that? Yeah. Okay. It's, it's kind of that, like, if you're most of medicine was wrong at this point, and, and if you're wrong in a way to, which you're not filling people's bodies with mercury and radium, and you're better for them. And like there is some there are some like herbs and stuff that have actual medicinal potential so doctors. Yeah. Yeah. That it is still legal at this point. So, yeah. So about four percent of doctors in this period, where collectives, of course, Brinkley was not one of them because he didn't graduate. But he did get an undergraduate degree that qualified him to practice medicine and a couple of states, and, you know, while he was sort of bumming around Saint Louis drinking heavily. He met a one armed man named James Crawford in the two decided to open. What was essentially a fake medical practice together. Crawford decided to go by the name, doctor Burke, in Brinkley, went by the name Dr Blakely they called their operation the Greenville, electro medical doctors. Now, I just was trying to be fair to collecting medicine by talking about how it could be more reasonable than real medicine at that point in time in history. This is the point at which we get past them being reasonable. Because nineteen o eight is a period in which electric city is still new and exciting and like every new technology, people assume that because it was shiny indifferent. It must confer incredible health benefits. Sure, so electric medicine was kind of. A fad at this point, people would like fake doctors would sell electric appointments electric, toothbrushes, electric tinctures, electric, food, electric corsets, just by shocking someone with electricity, you could claim to be carrying them and most people would be surprised enough by this and sation that they just sort of go along with it. Sure. According to the book, charlatan, quote, Dr Burke asked a few questions, made a few notes and put out his palm for twenty five dollars a massive sum from there. The client passed into the treatment room. We're Dr Blakely spent the morning injecting colored water into rear ends. If anyone asked he said it was electric medicine from Germany and to rear ends. Yeah. He's, he's shooting, dyed water into people's asses, telling them that it's electric German medicine. Good. Is there actually is he also shooting electricity into people's asses, or he's lying in claiming it's electric water medicine. They probably have some like electric gizmos near the water so that people believe that it's electric medicine but it's, it's just atwater. It's just colored ass water. Good. Okay. Okay. Yeah. So this this scam worked out for a while. But obviously shooting people's asses full of colored water did not cure, any known problem, aside, from the dubious problem of not having enough colored water in your asshole Brinkley. And Crawford were eventually rightfully arrested for being frauds and thus ended the saga of the Greenville, electro medical doctors. Hey, hey, it was still like what do people get what is that called a Kalanick to, like clean out your bomb? I wonder if maybe that, like dyed water in there in people's houses was doing something like that. I don't know if kalanick's have any sort of medical benefits, but I, I just want to give them credit where Credit's due, you know. Yeah. I mean, I think Kalanick would be a good example of, like modern day, snake oil because while they're all there are like certain situations in which like they can be helpful. They're kind of treated as cure all for problems. Right. I guess I think it's the same thing as like electrocuting someone and it being a weird sensation. And so you assume something medical has happened. I think a lot of people get stuff shot up their asses in her life. Well that feels weird. It must be doing something. Yeah. Yeah. Placebo effect kind of does the rest. Yeah. The. I was going to make a pun like the ask CBO of fact, but I don't know if it was going to work. Yeah. That's one of those, those jokes that would that works better written than spoken. Yes. Yeah. There doesn't good. Well, we tried. We tried. We tried we tried now after getting out of jail, not a doctor Brinkley. Met a girl named many she would prove to be the love of his life, mainly because she was exactly as down with his dreams of pretend to be a doctor as he was for three years, the couple of wandered around Kansas, and Arkansas with Brinkley working as a traveling doctor in many acting as his assistant. He eventually made enough money at this to buy a diploma, which made his claims of to actually be a doctor. More credible may seventh nineteen fifteen the eclectic Medical University of Kansas City gave him the validation, he'd always craved, this MD cost Brinkley. One hundred dollars and gave him the right to practice medicine in eight states. So he immediately set up shop in Arkansas, working as a rural doctor his big strategy was to rent a horse in charge out of town numerous times as if he was constantly unimportant emergency. Call saving lives. This particular Griff did not work out. And he and many head to leave. So I'm quite the low point in our hero's journey right now. But you know what can be the high point in in your hero's journey listener in and you as well. Caitlyn. Yes, is the fine products and or services that advertise on our show, which certainly aren't going to be snake oil. No. We do not advertise for any companies that will shoot electric water up your ass. And if we did, I promise, you listener it will be the best electric atwater that anybody serves we vet all ass based businesses, personally, I do. I personally that, yes, it's critical. It's important, you can't advertise for ass based medicine without without putting your own on the line. Exactly. Yeah, I wouldn't be able to live with myself, so. Every cultural phenomenon comes down to two things. Math and magic. I'm Bob Pittman chairman and CEO of iheartmedia. And one of the things I always loved is trying to code how big ideas, find their way into the world. My new show, math and magic is about those stories about the stories from the frontiers of marketing each show. I sit down with visionaries the here. Dave used data and creativity to bring a credible ideas to life. It was just pure desperation. So I come in to the programming meeting can I got an idea? I was fearful that creative executives would see me, walk down the hall, and run and hide is like a there's the data nerd every label was saying, not really scooter. You're great at marketing, but like it's YouTube kit. Let's say guys, there's a sleeping giant over here. You're not thinking tension. I discovered Justin Bieber. New to listen. It subscribed to math and magic on apple podcast, the iheartradio app or wherever you get your podcast. We're back. Those are some good products. Really? Good. Wait. Can I just quickly recap what we've learned so far about his legs? Do please do. So he practices medicine sort of without any sort of credentials, and then he goes to an unaccredited university doesn't finish and then opens up a medical practice and then gets arrested. And then he buys a diploma, the without, you know, getting any sort of medical train or like any additional medical training, but because he has the diploma that he bought he is now certified to practice medicine in eight states. Now is this the climactic medicine or is this like the more legitimate medicine collective medicine? None of it's I mean yeah, it's a collective medicine because seen as semi-legitimate at that point in time I see. Okay, great. Well, I mean I'm proud of him and his accomplishment. He's so far. Achieved his dreams. Yeah. I'm sure nothing horrible will happen. Definitely not. So in nineteen sixteen Dr Brinkley got a job at a meat packing plant in Kansas City, working as a doctor for the animals. They kept on hand. He's spent many hours on duty board in watching the most entertaining thing if available to him, and those pre television days, Billy, goats fucking later, recalled being impressed by their considerable, Lubis ity, which I think means the Billy goat vaginas, get really lived up. But I'm not really sure. Yeah. The, the main syllable, there's is lube. So that's, that's why it's my guess the root word. Yeah. So, okay. The couldn't could he thought Billy goats, fucked good. And he was also impressed by the fact that they got sick, less than any other species of animal at the plant. So he started to think about. Would it be boscell to take some of the some of the traits of Billy goat and put that into a person? I can't wait to see. We was going. Yeah. It's important, you understand the importance of what we're called glands to cutting edge medicine of the day. Now glands were generally testicles from various species, including human beings. I'd like to read a quote from the website, quack watch that sort of sums up the building science in this period of gland replacement Charles Edward Brown's card, a noted French physiologist had shocked the medical community by injecting himself with the crushed testicles of young dogs and Guinea, pigs afterwards, he claimed that he had regained the physical stamina and intellectual vigor of his youth. Many men availed themselves of cards methods, but once the placebo effect was filtered out little remained in Vienna. Physiologist Eugene, Steinbeck proposed that youthful metality could be restored by increasing levels of testosterone. The easiest way to do this dynamic said was through the septum e sperm, production, wasted testosterone. And if the channel leading from the testes to the Jackie Latorre duct, tied off than blood levels of testosterone would rise Brinkley may also have heard of the work of Serge Voronoff, a French doctor who was stirring up a storm of controversy with his experimental Glenn transplants. Voronoff had been a physician in the court of the king of Egypt and there had spent a great deal of time, treating the court eunuchs, who suffered from variety. The of illnesses, he hypothesized that maintaining active genital Glenn was the secret to health as proof. He cited his experiments with an aging, ram into which he had transplanted the testicles of a young lamb. The Rams will get thicker and his sexual vigor returned Voronoff, then went on to transplant. Bits of monkey testees into aged men, he Clinton success, although he could offer no scientific validation of his claim. So okay, so science of this time was hockey put falls. Yeah. Just like just men being obsessed with their balls. And that has not changed the signs of today. You're absolutely right. Yes. But in that point in time they would look at other animals that had big balls or fucked a lot and be like, what have I put those balls in my balls? Yeah. Yeah. It's some innovative thinking, so it's innovative. So all this was cooking off in the air in the medical community, while Brinkley was getting start now in mid nineteen seventeen. He was briefly drafted by the military to work as a doctor for the sixty fourth infantry division. He served a total about two months, most of which he spent in sick bay complaining of multiple reptile fistulas. He was kicked out of the military in August. Next, Dr Brinkley in many moved to a little Kansas town called Milford. It was not quite in the middle of nowhere, but you might call it nowhere. Jason Brinkley worked as a rural doctor again and his wife worked as a midwife. They made it if money to get by working incredibly hard and providing a useful service to their local community naturally, John Brinkley. Hated it and desperately wanted way that way. She's like not enough falls, not enough balls. Well, the good news is that he was about to get so many more balls than anybody should ever have thank goodness. He was approached one day by a forty six year old farmer named Bill Stitz worth now. Stitz worth came by Brinkley's office. One day and said there's some. Nothing wrong with me, though, look at me, you wouldn't judge it. I do. Look husky. Don't I when Brinkley nodded sticks worth continued? I'm all in. No pep. I'm a flat tire. Now, this was Stewart's way of slowly admitting in, you know, nineteen like teens terms that his dick didn't work so well. And this shouldn't have been surprising. I think it's pretty normal for forty six year old men who work in intense, backbreaking, physical labor job to have trouble with that. In fact, it might be weirder if he'd had no issues at all. But sticks worth complained to Dr Brinkley that he'd tried serums medicines, and electricity all to no avail now next, according to legends that were later spread by Dr Brinkley himself. The old farmer side and said too bad. I don't have. Billy goat nuts. Did we only have Dr Brinkley's recollections of what happened next and they come from a biography? He commissioned twenty years later, called life of a man. So put a little bit of a little bit of salt on this next sure the doctor half closed his eyes and considered. And then he shook his head slowly the code of ethics is father had drilled him forever. Forbade him from any conduct, especially with relation to healing, except the utterly honest, and straightforward, but the father, begged and begged, and eventually Brinkley agreed, he would try and put goat testicles into the farmers body, his official publications made it later seem like he was basically forced into it out of sheer empathy for the distraught patient. But years later, Stitz worth's, family would admit that Brinkley had offered the old farmer hundreds and hundreds of dollars to let him experiment on his body, so that's cool. Where's this farmer getting all this money for for the? The farmer got the money from Dr Brinkley. Oh, okay. Oh this. Yeah. Yeah, he bribed he bribed them to get let him put goat balls in him to test out the surgery. I see. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Dr Brinkley removed a healthy goat's testicles and just sorta shoved him inside the farmers nut sack, and then sewed it up. Yeah. Stitz worth reported an increase in vitality possibly due to the placebo effect and also possibly due to just lying the word spread across town and soon another farmer and then another had received goat ball implants. Shortly thereafter, missed it's worth demanded that she get set of goat ovaries to increase your own fertility. Vitality next. Know life of a man quote. Dimly Brinkley had begun to realize that he was gifted beyond the run of doctors. So he, he realized that he was an unusually talented surgeon in an unusually brilliant, thinker due to the incredible success of his, his goat testicle and over implants. Now, I don't know if you know this or not. But is he replacing the human testicles with the ghost, or he's adding them? In addition to what's already there. He's just jamming them up there. Okay. Shelvin. Now sometimes it's just bits ago testicles. He does it a little bit different every time because he's not a real doctor. Sure, I mean who need consistency when it comes to consist medical procedures. So he decided that someone with his sheer God, given talent could not limit themselves to the rules of the jealous, sheep ethics of the American Medical Association and the other gradually professionalizing medical bodies of the ehre, Dr Brinkley had developed an intense dislike of the AMA, some of this may be due to the fact that if you weeks after his first goat ball, implantation, he traveled to Chicago to take a refresher course on surgery. He failed the class, his teacher said that this was because of his attendance, not being regular and because of his indulgence in alcohol. I admonished him to leave liquor alone to concentrate on worthwhile endeavor, and improve self as a man and a physician to which he replied, I have a scheme up my sleeve, and the whole world will hear of it. Okay. So he's just like this drunk dude. Who's just a drunk guy puts walls loudly admitting that he's planning to scam. Everybody in pretty successfully scamming every, yeah. Yeah. All right. In august. Nineteen eighteen John Brinkley opened the Brinkley institute of health in Milford Kansas, the growth of his clinic was massively aided by the fact that months after his surgery Stitz worth and his wife had a boy. They named him. Billy. Oh, no. After billy. He became the first goat gland, baby. And of course, it's very existence was credited to Dr Brinkley's, incredible science more testimonials followed soon after the old farmer and business than poured into Dr Brinkley's clinic, he began charging seven hundred and fifty dollars in operation. That's about fourteen thousand dollars in modern money obviously. Yeah. It's expensive. It's like what you'd pay for major cosmetic surgery today, but it's just go testicles, right? Now, obviously many of these implantations did not work, some of them. I mean, none of them worked, but many of them had disastrous side effects, but it is kind of saying many people had goat testicle pieces put into their balls without anything. Terrible happening the human bodies incredible is what I'm getting at. I mean it's very resilient. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Part of why so many people reported incredible benefits undoubtedly owes to the placebo effect. Some of it, though, was due to Dr Brinkley's, peculiar advertising brilliance. Here's quick, watch again, almond needed the Brinkley operation, he declared, but the procedure was most suited to the intelligent and least suited to these stupid type this, of course, insured that few of his patients would admit they had not benefited from the operation. One people for going in that like it doesn't work on dumb people. Wow. So he's kind of brilliant. So he's putting people in a position where they have to basically just lie and say, yeah, this is working out. Great for me. Okay. Love love a lot of love heavy gas lighting in medical procedures as well. I mean he, he is the gas lighting. Doctor, I think I can imagine. All right. I mean so a another question he he's doing this for. Test. He's putting testicles in two men's ball. Yeah. Sacks. But there was at least one case of a woman having over overseas. Okay. So there are okay. All right. So he's just that he did more balls than ovaries. I see. But he's, maybe not equal. But like you know, there's some different. Yeah. He ovaries up a lot of ladies and actually, you know, spoilers Caitlyn, he's kind of a feminist icon, but we'll get to that in a little bit. Icon goat ball? Dr John Brinkley. Great now. Right. As the greatest Griffin. Right. As the greatest gift of Dr Brinkley's life was kicking off the great influenza epidemic it. This is the nightmarish rave wave of disease that killed more people than World War One it was a terrible nightmare and completely counter to the rest of his life. Dr Brinkley rose wonderfully to the situation, he was remembered by locals, as being a wonderful doctor during this period, who only lost a single patient, the flu epidemic and worked all around offering people free care and whatnot to take care of the horribly ill people who are dying of the influenza. So this is like a singular moment in his career. I like four this, this one period of time he was a real doctor. And then he just went right back to scamming people for the rest of his life. But there is one redeeming moment in his life and it's the influenza epidemic. So all right. You go. Yeah. Now, once the Democrats over, Dr Brinkley got right back to work scamming, the shit out of people as his work drew attention. And media coverage, people were soon literally camping out around his clinic men and women for a little while. Implanting goat ovaries, and ladies was almost as booming trade is implanting goat, testicles, and men claimed the ovaries would enhance for Tilleke, but would also remove wrinkles and increase breast size. So I mean, everything that woman cares about everything that a woman cares about in one set, severed goat over his, I'm gonna go get my go-to over right after we're done. I mean, you know, I don't wanna I don't wanna spoil the next ad break. But we are selling goat over e pills for a limited time, guaranteed to do whatever, whatever you need go to overuse. We'll take care of it. Great. Yeah. So. Now, obviously a lot of Brinkley's patients got sick and died because he was just filling people up with the dead body parts of animals, and that's not great for you. But the internet didn't exist. And so Dr Brinkley was able to sort of fill the media of the day with tales of his patients, quote astonishing sexual vigor, and most people just sort of trusted him. He also shared case studies of patients, whose lives were changed in more significant ways. One popular account was of a boy, Brinkley, described as deranged who in his words, quote had been told finally, that he was incurable and must remain mental defected defective. He decided to commit suicide if I failed to remedy his condition and thirty six hours after the insertion of goat glands. This patient's temperature had risen to above one hundred and three Fahrenheit, but became normal twenty four hours later and has since remained, so his mind is gradually cleared. He looks and feels younger and his contemplating marriage the hideous dreams and nightmares, which destroyed his sleep and rest all his past life have left him. My second case of insanity caused this time by excessive masturbation was a young Bank clerk, brought to me from a state. Institution, following gland transplantation, his mind cleaned compete -pletely. And he is now the head of a large banking institution. I mean those are some ringing endorsements. Now is interesting to me that goat testicles can both increase your vitality and, and help you directions to impregnate your wife and stop your excessive masturbation, so that you can become a Bank president. And also, apparently, cure, mental illness, and, yes, depression. Yeah. I mean, why wouldn't go balls clear depression? Exactly. Yeah. That's the obvious. Right. So within a couple of years, John Brinkley. Hit identified twenty seven different illnesses that could be cured by Goethals. Everything from dementia, too. Farting. He insured people that has operations had a ninety five percents success rate, which was just low enough to explain away the odd death or life altering infection as a result of his not entirely competent surgical ministrations as a rule. Brickley was way worse at surgery than he was at selling. His slogans all energy is sex energy and. A man is as old as his glands. We're both pretty great. I mean so what year was this? I mean, that's yes. His nineteen eighteen wow, like all energy is sex. Energy is like something you'd hear it. A fuck in very specific kind of yoga retreat in Santa Monica. I feel like I tweeted that like two days ago. And he was a head of his time, and we'll consistently be ahead of his time until the day he dies, right? But I don't wanna I don't wanna spoil things too much. So in private doctor Brinkley had a habit of calling his patients old fools, especially while drinking. But in public, he was the picture of the -til man of medicine, much of his credibility came from the Van Dyke goatee, he wore, which was seen as the hallmark of the doctor because people back then were very dumb just as they all are now the reality, of course, is that John Brinkley was no more a doctor than I am a mechanic, just because it was able to hit my car that one time and make the engine turnover according to the book charlatan he only had a wavering conception of how to perform his own signature surgery, quote. Sometimes he slivered the animal gland, like clove, garlic and put the pieces in the patient. Sometimes he joined the smaller testicle to the larger a process processing likened to embedding a marble, in an apple some operation. Yeah, that's, that's pretty fucked up. So gross now. Okay, sometimes the operation was no more complex than tossing Christmas present into a bag. Skill wasn't the issue. Technically speaking, he was a competent surgeon when he put his mind to it. But quality control was, if he had best Brinkley, performed operations both before, and after the cocktail hour and his enterprise expanded, he passed off more and more of the work to assistance with medical credentials, even whisper than his own as a result. Dozens of patients died over the years, either in the operating room, or shortly after the return home many others were permanently maimed. So that's cool. Very cool. Wait, can I backtrack for just one second and so his like credibil- or the reason like people trusted him was largely, did you say, because of a his goatee like his facial? Okay, so he had the kind of facial hair. All doctors were supposed to have. Okay. I didn't realize thing, number one, number two where they called goatee back then and did that have anything to do with the fact that people trusted his goat because if it was like he has not. And then he puts goat balls into your body, that see what you're getting. Van dyke. So few show you the picture of them, and you can see, like, once you see his facial hair, you'll recognize it as like every doctor, and like a nineteen forties. Like looney tunes cartoon has the same. Yeah. You see that. Yeah. Okay. Okay. It's wild that you could just have a certain type of facial hair and be like, yes, this is my profession. Well, I guess he's a doctor look at his facial hair. There was the world like we get down on the internet, because all the Nazis and the, the anti vaccine lies and stuff, but before the internet being a doctor just been having a goatee and lab coats, it's not like people have ever been very good at vetting reality. Yes. I suppose some progress has been made since. It's just been a consistently mixed bag. Yeah. Now. All right. Dr Brinkley, build the purpose of his work as aiding hopeless couples in conceiving children. He's so he slid articles into the local news with titles, like doctor J Brinkley swamped with lettuce from women. Craving, halo of motherhood, and the reality, is that a lot of desperate. People did see him as something of a fertility messiah at one point. He claimed to be able to even reverse hysterectomies by shoving goat ovaries inside ladies by the summer of nineteen twenty he'd pretty much. But by the summer of nineteen twenty he'd pretty much stopped performing surgery and female clients. It's debatable as to why my suspicion would be that stuff like mail vitality is easy to boost via the placebo elect alone effect alone since erections are largely mental. So if you tell some guy, he's get supercharged goat balls in his body. Maybe he actually gets more erections but you can't really trick women into having a uterus. That was good, then Robert think, again, because you could trick me into thinking I had a uterus if I didn't which I don't want my uterus. So actually that brings me to me, trying to sell my uterus right here on this, and then you can put it, what okay hang on. What if there was a sick goat and you took out my uterus and gave it to the goat? I feel like based on everything. We've learned so far that would actually help the sick goat. You're thinking, like a nineteen twenties, doctor, because right around this time, I think it was a French physician took a monkey's ovaries and put it in a woman just to see if you could make a monkey human hybrid. Why would he? They would just try anything everything at the wall day, medicine or no rules. There was no, like, like people tried to do everything because they like they just figured out like antibiotics, which is like, you know, you, you come from the era, when like getting like scraped by a wooden sliver on your way out to the barn is a death sentence, biotic seem like fucking magic so people have just like anything's possible. They tried everything so is like all of this is really ridiculous. And the credible doctors of the day are all against Brinkley and say he's crazy which we will talk about a lot more later. But people aren't quite as dumb as they would have been in another era to believe this stuff, worked just because a lot of medicine was fucking nonsense back then. Right. Yeah. Right. So we will continue talking about Dr John Brinkley and his nonsense medicine. But you know what's not nonsense. Caitlyn the products that we're about to tell you about. Well, you got it half. Right. But you forget the services and the services, yes, we're gonna forget, the services a service, without a product is like a product without a service, exactly. Exactly. Hi, this is Mark Murphy. And I'm the host of a new podcast from iheartradio called food, three sixty. Some of you may know me as a chef and a New York restaurant tour, maybe recognize my voice as one of the judges on food, network's chopped, I've been cooking for over thirty years, but I'm not done learning about food yet, and you should be there. Join me as we take a three hundred sixty degree look at history science culture and more all through the lens of food. It's about sugar right and understanding Mylar affect it's chemistry. It is protein and fat and Pete. I was a American chef opening a restaurant in New York City, which was highly unusual hair new, the new animals zoo, you know, let's go see that new animals. He striped exactly. In writing the recipe itself. Don't be flowery. Don't be purple get that information across really what's writing on your recipes someone else's dinner. Sure to subscribe to food, three, sixty on the iheartradio app, apple podcast or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. We're back so be just called me a nerd, which I don't appreciate. Soviet Soviet would you would you kindly since I'm not there right now. Throw the throw the throwing bagels across the room in anger for me. Hold on. She's he's gonna get throwing bagels. Well, she does that I'm gonna keep reading about, Dr Brinkley. So in one thousand nine hundred eighty one but we had attained enough renowned that he was able to visit Park Avenue hospital in Chicago and perform thirty four go Ned transplants in moved on from just operating on local farmers. One of his patients was a judge and other was the chancellor of the university's law school, a guy named JJ Tobias. When the Syracuse herald interviewed Tobias, after and asked if he felt younger, he said, I feel twenty-five years, younger, I'm a new man full of pep strong, healthy ready to go on with my work, I was ill old and played out, but the operation has revivify me next the reporter asked, how does it feel to have been old and then be young again glorious? It is so wonderful. It is almost unbelievable. The public can not appreciate what the operation means that has been some levity over the news of gland operations, but they should be treated with the greatest respect and admiration. So this is this is how he moves on from Mike. I'm gonna give you erections with goat balls to I will literally make you younger with goat testicles, and, like, because people want to be younger so badly, a whole lot of distinguished men just by right into it. Right. First of all, can I say that I love your old timey voice? Thank you. Very proud of it. You're doing a great job. Secondly, it's wild. I mean, I guess this isn't specific to men, but I guess, because we're talking about, I mean, men are mostly his patients, but the links that men will go to just try to fuck better and have better balls and stuff. It's, it's amazing. Yeah, it is. I feel like if instead of fire the first human invention had been Viagra. Like men at least would never have invented anything else, like it would've would've all been on women out, concrete and stuff like men would there's been. No, we've got we've got the dick pill. What else do we need? Which honestly I wish that had happened because I think the world would be a much better place if women headed voted every thousand times. Oh man. We gotta go back. Let's get a time machine. Go back to, you know Neanderthal days. Caveman times and just give give them the men biogra- and then be like, all right. Ladies the your your path is is free and clear to do whatever you want men. These pills will make you do whatever you want ladies. Take it away. Here's. It's all on, you know. Yeah. Well, one can help. So for a longtime John Brinkley was able to basically portray himself as the man who had conquered aging, he began to make bold claims about his ability to cure other diseases like blindness in the very near future. His delusions of grandeur were compelling to people who saw him at symposiums ended his office, they were less compelling to the people who worked with him on a daily basis. But one thing John's still drank way too much one night. He got wasted and destroyed his neighbors car with an axe for unclear but certainly awesome reasons another time he got plowed, and chased a bunch of his own patients out of his hospital with a butcher knife, in March of nineteen twenty one, one of his neighbors filed a protection order against the good doctor Brinkley explained I made some remarks concerning this fellow that caused him to be afraid, I guess, and they put me under a bond. I don't know whether I was arrested or not, but I had to give a bond of a thousand dollars not to shoot him. I don't know whether I was arrested or not. And I think I don't think he's lying about that. I think he was so Trump fucked. I don't know what the fuck. Chase me weapons all the time. This is stuff that makes me almost like him because it makes me feel like he's a kindred spirit. Because I, I don't know if you know this about me Caitlyn but I love chasing my patients in neighbors with knives. It's just a good time. Everybody has fun you get your cardio in. Yeah. I that good. Good. Good. Everything's great. Anyway. There was a rumor that Dr Brinkley's assistant, Dr Osborne, who was one eared was one eared because Dr Brinkley had literally bitten the other ear off. Oh my God really possible. But this is the case like a lot of people lost ears for random reasons back then, but yeah, he, he seems like he might have been an ear biter would not be the craziest thing. He did. But no amount of bad behavior from Dr Brinkley was enough to turn the town of Milford against him. The huge amount of money, he brought in helped, and by the early twenties he was performing fifty operations a month, which meant his clinic was bringing in five hundred thousand dollars a year in nineteen twenties money. That's roughly seven million dollars a year today. So he's, he's doing well, for himself, a decent chunk of that money got reinvested back into Milford. He paid for new sidewalks new sewer electric lights. A paved road to the railroad station and a new Bank. He tried to start a zoo and even bought the town bear. Unfortunately, the bear was too loud, and it kept Dr Brinkley awake at night. So he shot it to death. Okay. He bought the town of bear. Just a bear to hang around. Okay. It was shot at a bunch. Oh my gosh. I just thinking of, of Paddington Paddington bear in anyway. That's not important. Okay. Here's my real question. Where is he getting all of the goat, balls goats? And in fact, they pick out. They had a pin of goats in patients would pick out the goat. They wanted their balls room. Okay. So it was like going to nice like one of those fancy steak restaurants, where you get to pick the animal get to get to pick your goat or like lobster and a lobster. Okay. So I understand that go testicle. I understand that go balls. Come from goats. I'm not I don't know who Romulus is. But I do know that much. But so he's like he's as he breeding the goats and how could even breed them if he's taking on their balls away. And then also like that has to meet, that's so many goat. I mean, he's he's, he's buying a lot of goat's. Okay. He's buying fifty goats a month or so. Which is a sizable number of goats, and then just like castrating them. And then know. Yeah. The goats. Do they have that, okay? He's eating goat could stay alive without balls. But as soon they were eating after that I don't really know, though also written about his goat. I, I want to know more about his he's still he's. I feel like because you such a shitty surgeon, and he is drunk, all the time, he's probably just accidents killing these goats when he's like castrating them or whatever I'm gonna guess he wasn't very careful with the goat, definitely not I feel so bad. Oh my these poor goats, yet, the goods are fair victim in the bear is a victim of all of the people who got goat balls, shoved into them, I would say this victims. Yes. Yeah, I feel less bad for them than the bear because the bear did do fucking anything. Neither did the goats. I just don't like goats as much as I like bears. And that's I guess, racism on my part. I mean, there's no Paddington goat. So I get it. There's no Paddington goat goat on the California state flag true. Goats are baby go through. So cute the way they jump around. Yeah. Very cute. Very cute animals any. I know what you're wondering at this point. Kaelin. Yes. What kind of goat? What kind of goat? Did he get the testicles do under that 'cause I don't really know the different types of goats? Well he he preferred to use tug Enberg goat balls, because he, he thought they were better balls. One time he did have a set of patients from California who demanded that he put in Gora goat testicles in them, I'm gonna guess because angora goats are used to make very fancy spiders. Yeah. Yeah. And so they wanted they wanted the fanciest goats because they were Californians. In Gora goat testicles, stink, horribly made the testicles of his customers, stink horrible. So this, this was one of the issues that he encountered in his football practice, because I'm sure they're, they're, they're balls smelled fine. Otherwise without the end gory. Like Peter thing every day back then certain they're nineteen twenties balls smelled wonderful. Goats. Yeah. Okay. So what is the first type of goat? You said. Taught Toggenburg goat hugging. I've never heard if type ago will now Caitlyn if you've ever at a party in someone's, like, hey, if I want to replace my testicles with goat, testicles, what type of goat, should I use? You'll know it's a Toggenburg. There's, there's no other goat to replace your testicles with and rest assured that every party, I go to that question is being asked so oh, I know I know we go to a lot of the same parties. And I'm usually shouting about goat testicles at, at any given one of them. Yes. Can confirm now, the, the issues of patients, casually demanding smelly. Goat, testicles was minor compared to the major issue. Presented by real Dr Morris, fish bean. Now fish bean was the editor of the journal of the American Medical Association or JAMA and fish bean was like an actual doctor in the, the AMA at this point, you know, they still did some stuff that we would consider quackery sure they were trying to apply real science to medicine. So they were gradually learning what didn't work as opposed to. Just continuing to jam goat, testicles, and people for huge amounts of money, anyway, according to crack watch fish bean, quote called Brinkley, a smooth tongue charlatan and urged the authorities to revoke his right to practice Brinkley's assertion. That is procedure could cure conditions ranging from insanity to acne to influenza and high blood pressure amounted to quackery fish beans said in response to this Brinkley called the American Medical Association a meat cutters union in charge that its members were jealous of him because they were losing business. So my nineteen twenty two John Brinkley had gotten rich enough selling. Quack nonsense remedies to make vein men feel younger that there was really only one place on earth for him to go next Los Angeles, obviously. Yeah. Yeah. That's where you go. That's where you go there. He met up with Harry Chandler, the owner of the Los Angeles Times, Chandler had invited him out to California in the first place, do a story on him because Harry Chandler was the true paragons of journalism he intended to do the story by having Dr Brinkley insert goat testicles into one of his editors he told John. If the operation is a success, all make you the most famous surgeon in America. If it's a failure all damn you with the same gusto. Now, the issue that confronted donkey Brinkley, is that under California law has medical licence was not valid, thankfully, this was the nineteen twenties, and Harry Chan there was able to secure him a thirty day permit to practice medicine. And so Dr John Brinkley began cutting out goat testicles, and sticking them inside human beings. Once more he implanted new balls and Chandler's editor in a US circuit court judge in several unnamed movie stars. And according to rumor even Harry Chandler himself. Many of his patients gave his work rave reviews as can be seen in the title of this nineteen twenty two L A times, article, new life in glands, Dr Brinkley's patients. He has show improvement, many victims of incurable diseases that killed twelve hundred operations all all successful. Do you think like Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton have entirely possible? Goat balls in their bodies. I think he even I think he met Buster, Keaton and BUSTER. Keaton made a movie in this time that referenced goat gland operations really entirely. Yeah. It's entirely possible. Like we know several movie stars because it's like they're movie stars. If you tell them you could make him young again and fuck better. Exactly. That's hollywood's. Never changed. If he came to town today, and people believed this, like fucking every famous guy in town would be. Yeah. Who else fatty arbuckle? Is that a I feel like that was the guy from that era? I should know this if several. Buckle was a guy. This is before he crushed that woman to death accidentally, well, that's probably not what happened. But when he got that's when he got tired for seems like he kinda got screwed over on that one in may have actually been a nice guy. I don't know. Either do some research about it. Yeah. I did we talk about it in the episode about the Nazis in Hollywood speaking, a witch Nazis, do come into this story later. Oh, yes. It's, it's gonna be fun now after performing forty thousand dollars worth of operations. John Brinkley hit upon the idea of expanding his practice. He decided to open a new clinic in sonata, California, I secured a location at into not up because of what appear to be climactic conditions. Peculiarly favourable goat gland operations to perform the operation most successfully, the sojourn should be located with climate ranges, around seventy degrees and is not subject to shop changes. So really want those cool southern California breezes on your goat balls. Yes, you do. Of course you do that, that basic science. Yeah, absolutely. But alas John Brinkley's ability to practice in the Golden State relied on his ability to get a permanent medical license there. And this was something the state of California was unwilling to grant him due in large part to the crusading work of Dr Morris fish, beam, Brinkley found himself denied and forced back to Milford. John put a good face on it, claiming he'd never really wanted to move out to California, anyway, and that everyone knew. The comb restorative powers of the Kansas countryside were better for a hospital than stupid old, California. Yeah. The reality is that he was deeply worried Morris fish being in the AMA, we're increasingly writing his ass for all of the, you know, the dangerously unregulated surgery, that he was performing Brinkley fired back by having his publicity people shoot out even more testimonials from satisfied goat testicle recipients. Bills. Sorry has demoniac. Oh, I didn't even get that. That's good. Thank you. I'm here for. Yeah. We'll make that kid. So we can we t-shirt that? She's nodding, not reluctantly. She's nodding enthusiastically. So anyway goat ball, recipient, t shirts that just say. I have a goat's testicles and may. Well, we'll work on the topic. We'll, we'll keep. We'll keep. We'll keep being in that back and forth. Brinkley's biggest coup was Senator Wesley Staley of Colorado, who called Brinkley and his wife, quote, two of the finest people in the greatest benefactors to mankind on earth. I wear goat glands and, and proud of it. That's what we put on the shirt. And then blow that testy. Monia l- testimony, Dr Brinkley, collected one hundred different testimonials testimonials into a book called shadows, and sunshine and published it in an effort to fight back against what he claimed was the AMA's dangerous misinformation. The AMA tried to riposte most notably with a series of posters, titled testimonials are worthless which featured testimonials from patients claiming to have been cured of various diseases from quack medicine on one side, and then those patients death certificates listening to cause of death is the exact illness. They'd claimed we've had cured on the other side. These facts had close to zero impact on the American people clambered to spend sixty five yeah. Yeah, exactly. People still were more than willing to spend seven hundred and fifty dollars each on goat glance. But what about the folks who were too poor for Dr Brinkley's, revolutionary testicle surgery. Well, according to the book charlatan, quote, Brinkley, had this angle covered already with his special gland emotion, which he sold mail order for one hundred dollars. Rectal, syringe included. Oh. Great great. If you couldn't afford to get goat balls implanted in your body, you would send you a bunch of ground up goat testicles in an ass syringe. Okay. Let me be clear about this. Sure if. Absolutely. I the I feel like you don't need a syringe to insert something into your rectum. Your rectum is already like has an opening that you can put stuff in there. Why don't you really what you want to squirt this stuff up there? You really want to. I mean I, I don't know if you've ever split it squirted grownup goat, testicles inside your asshole. But you, you really want to get one and get them right up in them guts. Okay. Right. Up in them guts, that because that's where testicles do their most important work is right up in them guts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Of course, of course, just basic science. We, we all we all we all graduated eighth grade. We know how science works shut. You shove the goat balls as far up your ass as you can go, and then your healthy again. Okay. I just I'm like I wanna puke at the thought of a rectal. Ringe. Yeah, it's one of the worst combination of words that I can imagine. Okay. Ready? Of course. People imitated Dr Brinkley's goat gland products. There was the youth gland chemical laboratory of Illinois, the vitality, gland company of Denver gland doll, Glenn tone. Glenn dean Americans in the nineteen twenties. Absolutely could not get enough glands. The money flowed in, in John Brinkley. Eventually realized that he needed to do something with it. He decided to build a radio transmitter way nineteen I wasn't expecting. You didn't call that. Did you ain't? Nobody calls that shit. Yeah. Yeah. He decides to build a radio transmitter in nineteen Twenty-three. He got his first broadcasting license and started construction of a massive transmitting tower, one of the very first in the American midwest. Now radio wasn't really something that existed in a big way back, then it was early enough in the history of the medium that there was actually quite a bit of debate as to whether or not advertising should even be allowed on the radio. Most of what was out. There was just broadcast of symphony orchestras and other really boring bullshit, Brinkley station, KF, k b which stood for Kansas. First Kansas best was going to be different while he waited for construction to be completed John Brinkley, and many left the critical business of implanting goat balls into people to their assistance in went on an ocean liner voyage to Asia, they stopped in China where Dr Brinkley inserted goat testicles into the president of the Bank of peaking. Then they steamed hard to Japan where Brinkley proceeded to insert more goat glands into more human males on April twenty first nineteen Twenty-three the Gettysburg star in sentinel ran this article, Glenn transplantation now. Used by Japan to put aged infirm, back at work, high class goat prices soar. Okay. That article goat gland transplantation has been made. Compulsory in Japan by the government in order to rejuvenate age. Charity patients within the past few months, more than two thousand of these inmates have been undergone the operation and are all again, earning their own living. So that's exciting. Yeah, it was a it was a lie. Obviously. Yes, it was. But also with if you look at it from the point of view that it's not a lie. He's actually like a really good person. Yeah. If you if you pretend it's not a lie. He's an incredible doctor, I'm surprised that he when you were saying earlier, that he likes, thanks so much of his money into, like helping his town. And I mean, buying a bear that he did later shoot and kill. But I mean he is I suppose, he's, he's more philanthropic than I would have imagined but yeah, we'll get to that in a little bit. Some of them may have been self preservation because offer him in a big way in the second part of this story. I see. Yeah. But I think also he just kind of wanted to be the biggest man in town. And if you're going to be the biggest man in town, and you don't want people to hate you. You gotta bribe him with an ice things. Right. Right. Okay. So Dr Brinkley through his interlocutors in the media began to claim that be goat glands. He was putting people did more than just restore the Taliban. They helped breed, a better class of human being. It was thinking that was deliriously in line with the popular you. Jenex talking points of the day. One of his doctor, W H blue of New York City told reporters the children have parents who have been endowed with goat glands a healthy and alert to an unusual degree new glands me, not only new, battalion the men and women now living, but they actually mean better babies, I say in this, making possible disappear type of human being. Dr Brinkley has made a discovery of the first importance to mankind. Wait. Is this the part of the story that the Nazis come in, because I know shockingly enough. This is the part of the story with the Nazis come into it. All right now, Dr Brinkley was in reality about to make a discovery that would change the course of mankind, and all of our lives forever. But that discovery had nothing to do with glance. It is however, going to come next in part, two of the epic tale of John Brinkley, the man, who loved adding the balls of other animals to the balls of human beings. What a good cliffhanger. Thank you. Thank you. I was I was proud of that one too. Caitlyn plugs and plug Ables. Sure, don't don't don't plug goat glands into the audience because of that done already. Well, I guess, I have to undo some damage I did to my patients. No, you can follow me on Twitter and Instagram at Caitlyn Toronto. That's C. IT. L A N. And then you can listen to the Bechtel cast my podcast about the representation of women in movies that super producer. Sophie, sitting right next to me, also produces, and, you know, there hasn't been a bio pic made about John Brinkley. But if there was you can bet your ass, we would have covered it on the Bechtel cast. I think it would pass the Bechtel test, because John Brinkley was a feminist icon. Yes. And actually little known fact placing the testicles of goats in to a human man. The act of that surprisingly enough does pass the Bechtel test. Yeah. That's a, that's a little disgust corollary to the Bechtel ten. Yes, but that you can either have to women have a conversation that, that doesn't involve a Amana relationship, or you can have somebody insert goat testicles into human scrotum. Right. And I'm glad that we've cleared that up right now right now. It's important. Yes. So check out my podcast. And. Yeah, follow me on those places. Okay. You can find me on Twitter at I right? Okay. You can find me on the Graham as the kids, call it at, at bastards pod. And hopefully you can find this podcast on the grammar at bastards pod. You can't find me there because sofi runs both of those because I am not allowed, but that's for the best for the best. I'm sure she's Notting. She not in Caitlyn enthusiasts. Yeah. Yeah. That seems right. You can find t shirts on T public dot com. I have another podcast called it could happen here if you feel like after this lively story of testicle implants, you wanna hear horrifying predictions of the civil war in modern America? You're a weirdo, but, but that podcast exists. Maybe check it out. Yeah. That's, that's all I got. Testicles. Hey, animal lovers. I'm Kate golden, I studied psychology evolutionary biology, and I host a comedy educational puck has called creature feature. The podcast delves into the most unbelievable animal and human behaviors on the planet every Wednesday kissed comedians and scientists delve into the minds of the craziest creatures. Evolution has concocted. We ask are we really that different from our hairier cousins? Iheartradio is number one for podcast. But don't take our word for it fine creature feature on the iheartradio app or wherever you get your pockets.

John Romulus Brinkley Caitlyn Dr John Brinkley apple Brinkley doctor Brinkley Sally Wilk Griff griffin Chicago cure Billy goat Sophie Letterman Dimly Brinkley iheartradio United States Robert Evans Jackson county Ron Hubbard Medical University of Kansas C
Why Does Cashmere Cost So Much?

BrainStuff

07:56 min | 2 years ago

Why Does Cashmere Cost So Much?

"This guy has killed somebody. You don't know who he is. He's left his DNA. And he is out there potentially going to kill other people the lay police have submitted letters and envelopes from the zodiac killer to a private lab to obtain a DNA profile, so he's probably very worried, and he should be because people like me not gonna stop on March twenty sixth monster, the zodiac killer reaches its conclusion listening subscribe at apple podcasts or on the iheartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to brain stuff from how stuff works. Hey, Brian stuff. I'm Lauren Vogel bomb, and if you were to ask windy pie, a good farmer in Bredon main to name what she likes most about her work. She'll tell you it's the individual personalities of the goats for what she cares. She said think of the word capricious that comes from the word cap Ryan, which is Latin for goat. They're like that they'll jump and dance and they'll climb on anything. They're affectionate. Pious particular type of goats forty to eighty of them depending on the year are also some of the providers of a valuable product for humans. Kashmir. Yes. In case, you didn't know your favorite softest and probably most expensive sweater comes from the for of the Kashmir goat. And once you know, what's involved in making a cashmere sweater, the price might not seem so exorbitant. Goats are one of at least eleven wool producing animals. The list. Also, includes sheep, rabbits, and Lama. There are several varieties of Kashmir goats and a number of farms factories and conglomerates around the world using various production methods to make Kashmir the first goats purported to be used by humans to produce fabric to keep warm are said to be the passionate goats. They're found in the super high altitude regions of western and northern Tabet the goats soft and dense under for is built to withstand extreme temperatures as low as negative forty degrees Fahrenheit or celsius. The wolf from these bucks a nannies favored by British royalty eventually came to be processed in Kashmir in northern India. Hence the name. Various bloodlines of Kashmir goats have with human. Help spread around the world. Australia has a particular breed the provides luxuriously soft threads North American. Kashmir goats are found in the colder regions of the US and Canada. North America is where pie and her husband Peter gov. Come in they have run spring tide farms since nineteen Ninety-seven pious dot gov. Eleven goats for his birthday in part to help clear their farmland. It has been a learning experience since then pie estimates. Spring tide is one of two hundred to three hundred cashmere goat farms in North America. Most cashmere goat farms in the US are small in size less than sixty goats says Pya who's also the president of the Kashmir goat association, a nonprofit whose website claims that brings together breeders fiber artists and others interested in these charming animals and the fiber. They grow. In March and April, you know, early spring is when the goats start to naturally shed their winter will end when production begins on the farms few US farms sheer, these Kashmir goats though because of production laws and the high cost to weed out the valuable downy undercoat instead most facilities and comb the wool that means workers often, the farm owners themselves sit with each animal and slowly tease out the further creates the fine wool for Kashmir. With a dog rake up to an hour and a half per goat. Pie explained. When you look at these goats, you see the long draping for that's the guard hair. The Kashmir hair is under that the crimp in Kashmir is three dimensional, and that's part of what makes Kashmir so incredibly soft an average goat provides just three to four ounces of Kashmir. That's about eighty five to one hundred and ten grams. That means a typically takes about six goats to make enough fiber for just one cashmere sweater. Once the Kashmir for is separated. Samples of it are sent for quality testing to one of two labs, the US one in Texas one in Colorado most legitimate US. Kashmir farmers have made a commitment to provide only high quality fiber outlined in the Kashmir, go dissociation standards and backed by organizations like the Kashmir and camel hair manufacturers institute, that means consistency or uniformity in the fiber each Fogle should be at least one point two five inches. That's three point two centimeters in length in its relaxed or unstretched state. And no bigger than nineteen microns in diameter. If we're in wool makes you h that's actually because the wolf fibers have an uneven thickness, the standard thickness of will is twenty eight microns Kashmir is much finer that standard of less than nineteen microns is why Kashmir can feel less scratchy. Kashmir that fails to beat these standards inevitably creates quality problems like pilling in the final product. And there are plenty of examples of bad Kashmir out there, while the Federal Trade Commission, enforces the wool product labelling act in the United States. It gets murky on the international market. Even the FTC says, quote routine testing, a fiber contents by qualified independent testing lab is the best way to assure accurate labels. That means it's hard for consumers to determine where the Kashmir they're buying comes from. And specifically how the goats are treated. Kashmir demand is one of the problems. It reportedly far exceeds how much goats could produce every year that means that less scrupulous producers may turn to inhumane methods to produce more wolf or lesser operating costs. The organization pita has accused Chinese conglomerates of shearing the goats mid-winter when the animals need the for to keep warm. Pyatt says that some farms to save production costs have even experimented with restricting goats diets, but aside from compromising the animal's health. It also directly affects the quality of the Kashmir she said if you starve your animals, the hair will get finer and shorter and more brittle. You can't spin it. They call it hunger. Fine. So if you wear Kashmir pie recommends buying directly from the source or choosing very carefully. Kashmir will consist of about one percent of a goat's total wool production for apparel. So the fabric. In those sweaters should have price to reflect the scarcity. But even for farmers like Pyo who sells her Kashmir online and at fairs festivals. It's difficult to tell if it's the real deal pirate herself has been fooled. She recalls a time when she found a cashmere sweater at a store for less than one hundred dollars. She bought it. It turned out to be acrylic another time she and her husband were visited by a group people who said they were interested in getting into the Kashmir industry. They brought with them samples of Kashmir. They had bought a trade shows in Italy pie recalls. They had this one, shall it was shiny in Kashmir isn't shiny. So we had to say to them. You know, this is really nice. I don't know what it is. But it's not Kashmir. Today's episode of Jimmy Allen and produced by Tyler clang for I heart media, and how stuff works to learn more about Kashmir with a k check out our compatriot podcast dressed the history of fashion. They've got an episode all about it called Kashmir with a k the controversial history of shawl. And of course for more on this and lots of other fine, topics. Visit our home planet. How stuff works dot com. If you're going to build something from nothing, you've got to know what really works. I took a thousand dollar loan built a five billion dollar business. And now, I make smart investments new businesses on shark tank. I'm Barbara Corcoran. Now. I'm sharing my secrets on my podcast called business unusual. You might think that looking at someone's resume and asking them a lot of questions are the key to finding the right person for a position you dead wrong. Follow business unusual on iheartradio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.

Kashmir Kashmir goat association Kashmir United States Pie Federal Trade Commission iheartradio Bredon Lauren Vogel Brian Ryan apple Barbara Corcoran North America Pyo North America Australia Pyatt pita
Interesting If True - Episode 43: Give 'Em The Goat!

Interesting If True

33:02 min | 3 months ago

Interesting If True - Episode 43: Give 'Em The Goat!

"And welcome to interesting if true the podcast. That's gone to the dogs or other animals really. There's a goat in a pig for sure and they all better scurry. I'm your host this week. Aaron and with me is shay yes it is as always sir. I'm shay and this week. I learned that during cold winter months. Alligators will fall asleep with their snouts sticking through the ice to get fresh air and it is at this point but you can safely draw dixon. They're not yeah. that's that's true. See those were probably mine. And i will not be invited back to florida anytime soon. Lord man is still cleaning up. After the rampage of old dicky and it is a critter show this week. I learned a bunch of stuff like for example teaching your dog to play fetch as easy for teaching a pig to play fortnite. We'll pay your rent. You should not call my future. Teenage son a pig. If i have anything to do with his cheeto intake might be. Your kids would come out. Orange is that the main reason you're not having children their presidential. We'll go with that. There's there's absolutely nothing in my. Dna worth replicating. I'll take it. So things have been more than a little hectic than usual here in interesting lance so i thought we could all use with a feel-good show and like all writers with too little time alcohol and faith in humanity. I've turned animals. You know i did. I do have a new pop up. But yeah no i goose. He's adorable zoo. Oh my god yes well. Today we're going to feature a pig in a couple of jack asses you and me sadly this week show is one jack short. So in steve. Stead give you a fantastic tale of a canadian war donkey. Sergeant bill billy goat. He's done a donkey. He's a goat that's true. That's true those animals are not related but that joke necessitated me not knowing that out. I didn't know a word of war donkey was a thing. i guess. That's what this brings us to the i. It turns out that goats and donkeys lake together are the next two animals that are most popular as mascots after dogs and cats like military brands. And things like that okay. Cool actually i. i read recently. Something about donkeys goats goats donkeys goats being like the next fully domesticated house animals. Dogs were like that's been theorized. I don't mind goats that much but they are less cuddly. they've got horns and hooves heightens if your wife got her hands on a pygmy goat. It would be living in sleeping in bed with you and you know it awesome awesome. I sure i'm glad we don't know anybody who has a of goats and jim through glad. I don't know the code to get into your house to leave all those bunches of go. So our story begins in august of nineteen fourteen. Which for those interested started on. Thursday for greg and a wednesday for julian saw charlie chaplin's debut film making a living and that kerfluffle europe was having was picking up steam. I love your many history lessons kind of one of my favorite thing. They're they're they're good. That's important stuff to know. Don't you know and that brings us to broadview a small town in saskatchewan with a goat. Was anyone living in canada. Nineteen fourteen other than this guy with a goat. Yeah there were. All dave was a weird weird. Oh yeah i know david. He's a good guy. I met him down morton. Timmy's he's a buddy friend. Hoya on august twenty third. The soldiers of the freshly formed. V western cavalry expeditionary force had stopped in broadview to pick up some recruits. Wow queuing for the train spotted a girl with a goat. her name was also dave evans. Also dave develop. It's a nice day and wanting it for good luck charm and also because it was nineteen fourteen and you could just take stuff from people. They took the goat from young deasy. Kerr wayne to make it their mascot. They just they said sewri a ton a ton but they still took her took her so sorry. So this is art goto. Yes sorry. Dave oh so. Sorry so sorry. Davis zarko sources all agree. That daisy agreed. Soldiers could have it but there's never any mention of payment or how a group of soldiers from nineteen fourteen demanding a little girl give or pet to the war effort might have influenced her willingness to part with billy. Frankly i find it all suspect. I'm pretty sure some dude stole. They stole it from a little girl. I'm pretty sure they very politely stole ago. Do you think during the war. They'd like they'd like have a really easy missionary. Like god that was like stealing from a little girl right and then with the advent of candy after yield got over being terrible pre stealing candy from babies it was stealing goats from girls So so private. Bill was now properly conscripted. He lived in trained with the fifth in canada and their base. In england they pay for bill to cross the pond. They flew across the pond. Yeah yeah okay which was apparently quite some doing because when we get to the other goat like the british weren't big fans of foreign goats. I didn't. I would have thought so one of those things you don't think about but apparently it was a big deal so the fifth would soon be deployed to the front and i guess no mascots were allowed in the trenches just as like a general rule to the goat is something. They're gonna aim for all around the goat operation. Mutton went well the sheep but whatever so as you can imagine. This didn't set well. With the boys. The fifth who like many other regiments and both world wars found a creative way to endanger the life of their dear animal. Caban gosh do. They put him in a trench coat. Dress them up like a like a general. Like talk to general billy that way he will die. There was some officer related headbutting. We'll get into so according to sergeant herald baldwin author of holding the line quote. We cannot part with billy. The boys argued that we could easily get another colonel but it was too far to the rocky mountains to get another goat. I love that all right. all right. you can't fault as lodge racks tracks. The difficulty was continuing the quote. The difficulty was solved by buying a huge creative oranges from a woman who was doing brisk trade with the boys. I assume that doesn't mean she's a whore but she might be an orange for. Two-horse consists of bricks brisk trade. She was throwing oranges or briskly trading and tundra a continuing. The oranges sold like hotcakes. And in a jiffy. The orange box was converted into a creighton billy with shanghaied into the crate and smuggled aboard the trade. God that poor go-to person was stolen from a bomb. A tiny little girl that it was forced to train in battle and then it was stuffed in a box and then they put it in a box on a train and sent it to world war. One this is a tragic story. Eric why are you bringing such tragedy. This is this is just to say this is not having a great day so there you go now. You're a goat and just like a certain young naive aristocrat from famous askari. You're lost in a world wind of action intriguing warm beer. At least there's beer. Which apparently the soldiers beer rations and paperwork were apparently his favorite foods. All right at least. He got his paper foods. Yeah right like that could have been a lot worse and bill. You know you would go on to have a distinguished career for a goat. Are i mean you know more seriously. Though at this to sound a goat mix. I believe will. Apparently the british called it wires. Bill was found in a shell crater standing over a wounded russian soldier despite having his own shrapnel wounds guard goat guards you. Wow i what how would you feel oppression soldier waking up to a goat standing over your body protecting you in a shell crater. Lucky to be waking up yeah. I don't know what i would do. I would worship goats. I would worship right. I felt like i was trying to take an. It's gotta be warmer under the goat than it is under fire as yes later in the second battle of apis oh private. Bill stood his ground with brave canadian soldiers. Now famous for not retreating from germany's first major deployment of poison gas and despite what should have been a goat ending toxic cloud. He was found the next day no worse for wear like went on tin helmet or something like that some around ten helmet using their their orders. Then yeah that's right off orders. Just he really must have got their goat. Sheep goat for his steadfast valor. He was promoted officially to the rank of sergeant and february of nineteen fifteen at nouveau chappel. So that's nice. it's a good one. I feel like a for a goat. That's a good one. I anything for a goat. I guess is probably a good one. When i knew of the military. Is that when you become a sergeant people. Start calling you sarge. You don't have to abide by uniform regulations anymore and you have never ending cigars. Oh let's see. That seems really good. I should really talk to you about military rank. You put in so much better perspective than anyone who's ever been in the military you want your surgeon you get a nickname that's predict name and never ending cigar to chew on c. Right so in december of nineteen fifteen surgeon bill and the fifth took hill. Sixty three where sadly he was reported to trench foot or trench hoof. I guess It wasn't it wasn't ideal imagined. Either way yeah okay. I don't like i don't like where this is going. Yeah goats can get drenched foot. So now you know that. Hoof and mouth to maybe. They're not that flexible. I don't know how precious too fucking long eared missio. Yeah work as a lot less fun than talking about ghost so later while taking hill seventy in april of nineteen seventeen he would be shellshocked during the battle for me ridge Which apparently was quite the ordeal. What happens what a goat gets shellshock. That sounds terrifying. Yeah apparently the human combatants were way worse for wear as i mean. It was bad enough to shell shock. A goat yeah. He was in wounded twice at fister. Bert where he became a proper war hero. Though by saving the lives of three of his fellow soldiers save the guy in the the war. Trench what does it right. The prussian guardsmen the shell hole. Apparently goats have released sensitive ears particularly. We're like air pressure is concerned or at least. That's what modern numbers of goat stuff attributed his uncanny ability to detect incoming artillery to. Oh yeah apparently. He was known to know when shells were coming in his area. And so while under fire surgeon bill heard an incoming shell and saved three soldiers standing where the show would land by headbutting them back into the trenches all art loose. That is so ill. I mean he's a goat. There's not a lot of tools in that box but he used to. Well what a bad ass that is so all right so you're telling me when i'm building my super secret super soldier team. I need to include a goat. You need at least one goat. That's how you make that a successful team right. Okay yeah i mean. I already have a couple of koalas on the team for reasons patrons will see later but he's also credited with capturing three enemy soldiers by cornering them in their trench and then i dunno aggressively goading athem until his referral reinforcements arrive. Take you you said there's there's not a lot of goat can do other than goat. And he goaded well right. He goaded one hundred ten percent. Let me tell you that is awesome. Yeah ken bell. Who is a exhibits. Research and development coordinator at the broadview historical museum. Where bill's body is currently on display. Said quote my assumption. Is that the canadian. Soldiers must have come along later else. No one would be able to tell the story which tracks otherwise. Yeah when he was drinking with us the other day just going on and on about all of the future nazis again searching the soldiers saving enemy capturing goat as he had what did he. What was he doing at the time. i don't know he was chewing on the orders that he was he. He was executing orders. I don't need any stinking goaty orders. And but that's it wasn't all glory. For sergeant bill quote he was countermanded. Twice said bell. Okay is it. Because he ate the orders he was given. Yeah but he was drawn up on on court martial charges twice. I just wanna know who who when you wake up in the morning. And you're like yeah i'm finally jag. I have to prosecute a goat today. Oh god knows. Who's who's the general. That's like a damn at the orders again and there's no reasonable way for me to ask them to reprint them to blame it on the goat. I just that's i dammit. Go back to the worm and be like. I'm sorry. general go ate my homework on. What are the sergeants chewed up the orders. And i can't read them. What what sergeant. Billy billy billy goat. Don't ask questions sent him straight to my office. I want words with him so so apparently that's exactly what happened. The first time he was countermanded. He ate a bunch of important documents that were left unattended and like the battle tent where all the documents were yes so he just wandered in there and ate everything including the battalion's personnel role. There was a couple of factors that are singing his praises to this day right. No kidding and so quote from bill. Apparently at another point they weren't feeding him quite right and one particular sergeant had done something built in lake and made the mistake of turning his back on bill in the quote uh-huh and so bell continues that surgeon bell quote gave it to him in quote with the horns which were of course inscribed with the words fifth because it was a bad move and so the fifth late of using the phrase to give me the horns or whatever. God that is amazing. Yeah oh. I don't know. I guess there's a texas like football thing about giving people the horns but i'm giving credit to sergeant bill goat and whatever. Sergeant was feeding him wrong. That's his own fault self-correct cats and goats to animals. That will let you know when you fed them wrong. Yes just the other day. I didn't feed goose enough and he meshu see see. That's exactly how that communication channel. Whereas so now i consistently don't feed them enough. It's hilarious by war's end. He was a decorated hero. Having been awarded the nineteen fourteen. Nineteen fifteen star the british war medal and the victory metal because he was a goat. I guess yeah. He even merced with the fifth to berlin and in the victory europe parade in which she wore his fancy embroidered. Blue plush coat complete with his medals and sergeant stripes. Okay and i think you can look at your phone now in see that exact. Look at bill egot. Oh my god the pictures black and white obviously but it was blue thing so april twenty april twenty fourth. Nine thousand nine. Hundred billion unit was demobilized and returned home to sketch on and eventually the care of mr wayne who is now living in winnipeg. Bill would live his remaining years comfortably and following his death. He was displayed in the sasketchewan legislative building before finally being returned to the broadview museum where he stands to this day. You just told me. He was interred in st. Yeah go go was interred in st. This is amazing and even better. Because you can't do this with your normal heroes because it's really creepy. Now they get weird when you taxidermy. Human they really do you like you can still see bill. This is so cool. And so there's links in the in the show notes to his um veterans dot ca page and enter the broadview museum's website where you can see good high resolution color photos and learn about his display all of the other memorabilia that that is within their okay. I thought this goat was abused but now this goat was a this was a bad ass. This yeah he went over to europe kicked some ass and then came back home and and retired and comfort and live happily ever after. Oh that's cool up next we've got pigs. And when they fly simulator. Play them transition now. I see what you did there. I'm good at that. Thinks it turns out are pretty good at video games. No well okay fair enough. They're not monkey. Good you know. It requires sums in all but insofar as you can expect an animal to tongue joystick. Pigs are where it's at. I love it when the joystick nope. Our show makes me say funny. Thanks sometimes our show also makes me say things that are not pc at all. A much getting edited research from purdue university indiana. The only thing in indiana worth knowing about have shown that bigs are capable of using their snouts to operate a joystick to move a cursor to solve a problem to get a treat. Aren't we all. You know i've worked in. It for a long time and and no game console that feeds you cheetos when you get points. Oh yeah i know that's that should just be everywhere for everyone including pigs and so this seems like a lot of steps but rebecca Nordquist of science alert says quote. This is a complex task. The animals need to understand the link between moving around joystick. And what's happening on a computer screen and then link what's happening on the screen to getting a reward which you know. That's not nothing as i know. Humans who can't do that well and that's very through. I've been i've been training my puppy recently and just because of my him a treat when he sits down doesn't mean that when i tell him to sit he knows what that means. There's a lot of little steps you don't think about until you have to really think about them and then there's just a minutiae of a billion different things. We have to do for any action. It's the standard technical writing experiment right where you have to describe each step in making families yeah and inevitably everybody says put ham between two slices of bread and so following those instructions the way somebody who was unfamiliar with sandwich technology. Would you stand up. One slice of bread. And then drape some ham over it and then sat another piece of bread vertically on it and watch all your students look at you like you're an idiot i gay didn't explain it well enough exactly. I remember doing that in high school. Making a pb and j. and the teacher never opened the bread bag because no one ever instructed them to do so yeah nobody. Nobody ever got to that stuff her step. No one did right yeah. There's a reason why that's the first lesson they teach you and programming. Don't forget the easy steps. That's where all your data goes to die so we'll just makes a great joke fodder. There are some serious science behind it. The study is part of a growing area of research. An animal welfare specifically animal cognition the study which is linked in the show notes in its entirety and who visit long did read it. It was interesting. But it's by candidacy crony and sarah t. Boysan of the department of comparative pathophysiology an animal science at the center of welfare science at purdue called acquisition of joystick operated video task by pigs and it tracked the ability of two pampa tino Okay am panama minto. That was a lot of words in a row that were still sentence but in a okay. Yeah that was all titled the information that is just a cool to pain into micro pigs. I guess i'm sure i'm pronouncing that wrong. And to yorkshire pigs to complete joyce thick operated video game tasks to gain a reward as the pigs were required to move the computers cursor such that made contact with a three two or one world target the game randomly generated so kind of think of it as like solitaire. Pong without a ball. Or if you just controlled the ball or like a randomly. Generated breakout basically early atari. All right. so you're just moving your cursor to one of the edges of your screen. It's going to be one two or ascites based on based on just exactly so the easiest game ever and it would not stimulate me. And i don't care about the rewards because it's both no because you aren't into eating like pigs. Are i like bacon harass true that there's a whole cycle of video game life happening right here a if you look at your phone you'll see a big playing atari so that's new at this point you flash picture playing video games. I'm going to have some very stern words with you while i wasn't before things were trained to dutch the fake joystick with their snout on a process that took about two weeks to teach them from their real joysticks. Were used the apparatus if you look at your phones is basically just tari joystick and a bowl into which dog food pellets were vended. When the computer accepted the pig had completed a level which is all very silly and very low standards and rewards right. I feel like we should be expecting more from modern pigs. I would only for bacon even as a pig say they get some in in this study anyway. Super super raw. There are a few reasons why this matters a couple practical on some slightly heavier and i is that we know that pigs are smart critters their dog level capable of training and taking commands and apparently they're renowned for their spatial reasoning. Which is not something. That i knew it. Well they're really good at tetris. So apparently what they're not so great at apparently are like mirrors so you know like animals looking mirror and see a different animal. Apparently pigs never really grow out of that. Oh okay that's like testing babies grow out of that at some age and a lot of animals don't realize that it's not another animal. It's a sad day when kittens realized that. It's not another cat namara. Oh is that is funny. Business and unlike sheep and cows. Pigs are all but incapable of recognizing their piggly friends and photographs. Oh wow yeah. I have no idea how you do that test. But apparently it's been done so yes oh pigs are really smart except it these things that make them kinda dumb or yeah. It's it's an interesting mix of spatial reasoning image processing abilities. The one wouldn't think would lend itself well to a video game trial. No you really wouldn't would you those things you need all right now. Before we put any porky quarters under the machine i need to talk about the european union's farming practices good because why not as eurocentric show very interesting if true if true. So by and large europe's farming practices are better than ours. Were just going to get that out of the way. But more to the point they're becoming more automated mechanized and in many areas more humane spacious and social The animals oh good okay. Yeah all of which is good. Automation creates ease of life for farmers and animal alike while improve. Living conditions are great for the animals and the humans who want to feel guilty for lowering them make sense. Right helps me helps me amberg. Eu farms are increasingly using automated feeders. Which combined with free range practices means that the pigs need to be able to activate the features themselves so we need to know what level of mechanisation they're capable of interacting with as well as what level of complexity the animals begin to suffer stress. Oh okay so you could potentially a train a pig to move a joystick for a food or be let outside. I need mayor or something like that. Yeah like the these devices exist for for like dogs and other animals that we can train them to press a button for food. Or you know it a button. They'll go outside that kind of thing. So it's the same idea but the other consideration is ethical or the concept of quote intrinsic value or what is the value of a pig in and of itself outside of its ability to become bagan. Oh okay so. I am can. Can they add to society. Can they add no way that them being bacon is unethical in obsolete. Should we've feel weird about eating them out. Yeah so often. The answer to this question comes arbitrarily measured and intelligence or morphological proximity to humanity. Basically if it looks too much like us or is smart enough to make us feel uncomfortable when we murder it for its flesh. We don't eat it okay. Yeah yeah in this country right. Great apes dolphins dogs parrots and. Yes i know. You can get a heaping helping of any of those creditors somewhere but commonly. It's considered taboo to eat something capable of communicating with sign language morse code. Yeah yeah for. Example chickens. Though are pretty smart as terrifyingly most birds are and they are by far the most kept animal globally. Still we eat. The hell out of chickens is their fault that their delicious. see right. what was what was the chicken wearing the what episode where we were cancelled cancelled by chickens in the end if we better understand the cognitive functions of the animals we farm where we might be able to be more empathetic and practical on our stewardship of them. Let's teach animals to play. Fortnite seems like a great second. Step all of it. I can't wait until my teenage child loses to a pig on fortnight. i up to deal with that fallout. Thanks for listening to interesting if true if you like. What you heard. Friends might two sheriffs on the socials or leave us a good review. Wherever you're listening you can always subscribe at patriots. Dot com slash. It where for as little as a dollar a show. You'll get patron exclusive story. Each week out takes on the regular show and more you contact us find out more and see what else we do it interesting. If true dot com takes to the patriots of listeners. Like you interesting. True is a proud supporter of wyoming aids assistance. registered five. Oh one c. Three charity that provides support wyoming is living with hiv aids. Find out more at wild waves dot. Org thank you for listening sharing and donating and so finally our last story as promised the other half of this goaty sandwich. Non what the goaty mc flat bread none was the mascot of the canadian twenty first battalion and like other war goats. The plan was to leave non with a quartermaster upon deployment but as the soldiers loaded into transport on just jumped into the back of the wagon and nobody noticed until war. Wait so non unscripted himself. Yeah not nautilus volunteer war goat. Okay so whatever happens to non is on none. This is not my business is what i'm here is not anybody else's business. Yeah so non marched with the twenty-first through nearly all of their missions during the march to the psalm for example the union's transport officer got a burrup his ass about the ask eating all the rations and sold onto a passer-by for twenty francs. Is that much for goat. I've no idea or than the the soldiers paid for the last coat than either has cost them. So i don't know if twenty francs is a lot but it's twenty francs a prophet news of the transaction however went spectacularly poorly. It must not be enough for not know. The officer was quickly shown the error of his ways and dispatched to find the woman in all the transaction. How bad do you have to mess up for like. No you know you're not going to bed. You're not eating. You're leaving the camp in the middle of this war and you're finding that goat and you're bringing it back not only that but the people you're supposed to be in charge over saying thank you very poorly non saw action though in many of the same battles as bill and she was the first allied goat to cross the the first time he'd this is a woman. This is a bad acid. This lady go. this is this is even better. A nonce closest brush with death though was after war upon returning to southampton england. The board of agriculture insisted that as a foreign animal non need to be slaughtered or deported. Oh yeah as you can imagine. The first option wasn't much of an option as the boys. The twenty-first weren't about to let that happen. I mean they made. They made their superior go out and find him in the middle of the night. So i just finished fighting world war. I don't think you want to get in a pissing contest with me about my goat. Is this other country for some weird reason for three nights is that i feel like this is not the hill. You wanna die on the goats definitely. The goat is not so apparently after three weeks of guarded quarantine. She was boarded onto the ship carolina with her friends from the twenty-first and sent to retire. In canada's people is that is that we're goats. Go old people. Go to florida but old go go to canada. Yeah if if if you're an old veteran goat you retire retired. Canada barreling right. Good good healthcare there. You know i s. I can't fault you on that layer. There is better than it is in florida. I imagine florida goat does not get its own spot in in a museum florida Eaten by florida gator. Sorry with a dig on its nose. They all do this point. I've been busy Yeah so non. Spent the rest of the summer of nineteen fifteen on the grounds of the milwaukee hospital before being moved to the royal military college in kingston ontario which is useful by the way Where she lived in the stables fat and happy for the rest of her life today non is remembered her own section in the military museum of the armies of kingston goats are on display in canada. It turns out. There's i actually have enough for two more shows. Gated a there's a lot of goat's i don't know why people to go to war but there's one story that i'm going to do next time about the first goat to be in a bombing. Run the goat. The goat flew over germany. Okay so i run. How many of these goats are canadian. Goats like ninety percent of so many goats. Should we be afraid. Should we shore up the northern border like you guys have a bunch of dogs and other places have lions and tigers and bears. Oh my but apparently canada's got goats and we work with what we've got to be more worried if goats what what goes i. Apparently it takes very little effort to radicalize lee well and just love it and then it will fight for you forever. Because it's a coat exactly so there you go there you go goats. Pigs play video games and goats fight wars. What did you do with your friday. I just didn't off that you win. You win all right. Well yeah that was a lot of fun and if you're a patron you're gonna hear about some other lovely animals after the break. Well that was. That was the animal est animal show. We've done in a long time. I hope you learn some things about the amazing power of goats to save the world in bugs to get your high yet. I'm erin and i'd like to thank all of our listeners. Supporters and my delightful co host shea. Thanks for listening guys and find out more about the show. Social links on our contact information visit interesting of true dot com music for this episode was created by wayne jones and was used with permission the opinions views and nonsense expressing this show or those of the hosts only and do not represent other people organizations or lifeforms. All rights reserved interesting if true twenty twenty.

broadview museum billy Sergeant bill billy western cavalry expeditionary young deasy Kerr wayne sewri Davis zarko Caban Bill herald baldwin askari europe ken bell broadview historical museum bell dave Billy billy billy goat dave evans
Episode 10: On The Move

Daddy Shack Podcast

39:16 min | 2 years ago

Episode 10: On The Move

"Welcome to Daddy Shack. My Name's Paul I bet. And this is episode ten the last episode final episode of this series. been waiting for. This isn't the episode to be well. I think we should have done it the other way round. Kids TV. Las One because we really went through with. Was Gray episode. Climax. It's probably just ten off now. And that was. This one is all about on the move. When they start. Crawling and then walking well, even know what the time when we planned all this I. Think Rupee wasn't walking. Change lots changed. I think Sunday was pregnant when we started. But now episode ten. He's walking now. Yeah, that's crazy. I mean bruise like it's comes out such a long way. He called driving licence. East twenty seven. Yeah when they stop. Of course, it's terrifying is but you right so before the walking, you've got the crawling. Yes, so let's start at the beginning. You say that bird with Johnny. He he walked and crawled for the first time on the same day really. Ru crawled for quite a while, but he developed. This weighed spider crawl. I think I was talking talked about in the previous episode. Maybe the second episode sounds a bit nightmarish as he used to crawl with one leg up. I'm one knee on the ground and he was so fast right, really scary. Alien, you'd be like. Oh noisy. Yes he would crawl across very scary. it did not take him long before I start walking and he's doing that thing where you would walk between each the mandate would say the opposite side of the room, gradually building distance of and he'd of walk and fall, so we got the go, and like the the go, and but not the stop. I'm so. He would just kind of fall into it, but it didn't take him long before he was Probably walking, the thing is. Open till the point at which they can walk you go get you. Just walk, you know 'cause. He's clearly frustration because he wants to be mobile. And it's really awkward constantly falling over you know like bumping into stuff and. Just just gone with it. Just walk be so much easier if he walks. Wrong. Betty than wrong. Cherish the time whether I are immobile, and not a danger to themselves and others just plop them somewhere, and I stay there NASA's jump Peru. Yeah lost just sitting on the floor, the golden days. Great, and as soon as it just opens a new world of danger, it really does, and we consider crush ELM IT FOR A. while. You probably still. Walks into the oven door the day, right? Yeah. Zip Finger trump. Dangerous Times. Yeah with the with Johnny was very weird. Because he never crawled, he saw Saturday quite sad and annoyed. Everything will be. And Not surprised, and then once he started getting a bit healthier and the together. It was just what it was actually. We went away. He was about fifteen months and we went to a house. You've seen our house. higgledy-piggledy like live mouse. Yeah, the the step down into it. Yes. I really tiny front door banging ahead on. Eight and a half tall exactly yeah, it was a bad choice. Yeah well yeah thank. You down into it, so it's tiny dog. Seen Lots of songs, net friends who have fish. There is there is that. But you kind of the Living Room! is on one level and in the kitchen. Yeah, there's a little step up to the junior and. Little Hallway into where the kitchen is as a little step up into that and just a tiny little gap. Hold on a minute here. You take the pair of May for having a death trap garden, your whole house. And its location well as deathtrap now read. As yet, but not by not by our design. Not only we've done everything we can to sort of lessen the deathtrap penis. Aside from it being. Mostly, underwater and with all the musical difficulties death steps. The tripping and behead cracking. Removal There is a we're of the road. I'm pretty sure. Someone! Who is now a we as? Of the river. Yes, but that that's not there anymore. The flood ridden. Okay. That One element of. Massive dangerous. Every day! I'd be worried. Just like a four meter drop down to get. Out depending on the as well, yes. I. Have a fiery oven. Next to a pool drowning pool since that's just surrounded by concrete drops. Right. Third Anyway. so you can't build up momentum basically. And we went this to stay in this place in Oakland four few days from my birthday. And and. It was all on one level. And over I, went to get something in Johnny. Just start running off to me. This. You can walk. A. Just never had the space to build up the mental to get going I. Say this I. Really See. That's amazing, yeah! And then he started crawling around as well that you didn't even do this before. You swing of it now. Yeah, ru was. He was so fast certain crawling and then. Confidence on his fate and then he's just running your runs everywhere, but what used to do before we have the extension as well easel bow so e e to couldn't get much momentum, but we have alarming fall throughout our house. which can be a little bit? It's not great for the traction. Getting any purchase you have to be Bertha no socks. Definitely socks on, and so the have been a few skidding accidents where he's just GonNa flame but what he has a tendency to do, it would sabotage himself. By go in and getting things out of his toy box, and placing them on the floor in various places, and then routinely tripping over. Falling face down on the floor. Many injury! Freshens of a celebrity that. This Week David Beckham. We protect our children as much as we can. But winter king was only a five year old I heard rumors the he was drinking down a Harvester Carpark six o'clock in the morning with threats. Ferguson, so burst into tears and said son. You've let yourself down and you've let your nation down Brooklyn argued back. And when you argue Back Bay doesn't go well, so I've said you know son. Again sold to, Thailand for free. and. He said I'm so sorry I didn't mean to. But tough love something that I'm so passionate about at the time Victoria was upset, but she knew that this was what was best for us, and she was fully supportive. In the end. And these days I keep my kids in a safe in the bank day. After day, we caught the week and I wouldn't change anything. Happened today I was driving. And I was at the Zim Bradford at the roundabout by whip. See website. That, you can turn to web. Go whips, go do. What you sound like to me. you go out moist. See. That around I think he was at roundabout ground there anyway sounds a bit like an old fashioned Aleman. This Whips. Draw say yeah yeah. ooh! No any lakes. and. I was just going over the roundabout. There's lows and loads of entrances and exits and stuff. Coming off like a jewel carriageway and all this. and. Discard is Ben in front of me that he has a whoa like it. Really kind of went for it. To more so than just kind of some your average, Dick driver yeah. And then. I kind of pulled over decide. No, we wouldn't. Baseball came went behind me. It was in the middle of Police Camera Action. That's amazing. This'll shook me up up in IT, yeah! That could of I could have been worse. I saw similar thing. down the road I literally on that on the roads there and about street. And it was a police car chase. Burr. Chasing, these really shit like. CITRON'S CITRA advance agency or call now you know the in vans. The from the eighties have got like the really pointing not the lingo. No well earlier than that right feel like a cu. Next juicing fifty awesome. But yeah, it was it was the most unimpressive slow car chase ever seen any life. Man. Loads of fun. Thrilling so I interrupted, you and yeah recently rue as. A? New Level of danger so first of all he would he he's. He's only mustered. Steps Right It can get in and out up and down steps on his knees and stuff, but he's only just missed mustard salt, holding onto something, and then stepping down particularly down. So, Aleksandar they'll step down. He can now just get out of the house, but only that he's just tall enough now to reach the door handle. So he and he can open doors without any problem whatsoever so now. We have to keep that from door locked right if we are in the kitchen and he's planning lounge not. The doors into the lounge and the kitchen are much higher because they're author is does. The one the main door is lower. Yes, we've got that door closed than we have to keep it front door locked which you should do anyway this day and age. Because yet. There has been a time when he. came out and. and He's been down. The Stanton Jesus just run off into the road. Yeah, SCARY WE HAVE A. In our house if you open the front door, you're basically in the road acquire. Fizzy road. You've got long before gang out of the house a death. Yeah, because the the pavement is probably half the size of a normal pavement, if that very very thin and then as the road. And one time what some of our friends came around, and the daughter is only a little bit older than. She six months older than Johnny and this this was maybe. A year ago, something they came round. One of them went out to the car to get something, and we go whiz with Iris and then so the mom goes out to go to the car and Iris's by the CAA. In the compass, she the roads. He opened the door. Crossed the road by herself. This very busy row. Caused imposs- and went to the thing. Because like you know when you go people in your I been today. I went out came in by myself. You don't lock the door. You know what people's kind of things are is some does lock automatically. When you have to turn key and. Terrified is tariff. That could have been very bad. She's she's really the girl who who did that. She's very advanced for her age. She would have you know looked both ways I think, but even so. Terrifying so we. We've you started using. The harness. Right because really rouges lives walk in about like way. We don't have to walk the dog now. We have to walk through as well but a bit of energy. he today when they went to the park, and now J., said he, we enjoyed going down the slide. You know in stuff on people's knees and stuff, but he's not an on the swings or papers in not bothered. He dislikes running around. He likes being free and just writing about so. He will have spent a lot of time just running around the grass. And going and looking at stuff. But If you try to hold his hands, forget it. He's not interested. So he wanted just government in off and yeah, if you're on your screen, but the the harness is great, because the harness gives them a false sense of freedom. Goes on the little harness thing. We've got the handle at the other end. Anything sees free, but he's not. And you can solve. Stare in a little bit us. In the two different thing in the two parts of the harnesses very good are highly recommend services. I just wish they'd do like a full body one that went light, not just underneath his arms, but went through his legs. Like a proper climate Tom is right, so you need to you? Just pick him up by the harness. And you know. Scoop him carrying around maybe instead of a string stick. Yes. It's just a child on a stick. Yeah, that'd be great. IDEA. We tried to honest once with Johnny did not go well. Put on an eastside. We'll come on this early days of walking. and. It is want to walk over there and get pulled back. Absolute meltdown, but it was his tantrum ing. Period yeah now. Rude doesn't really know. He doesn't want you putting all, and he doesn't really know that it forgets there. but yeah, you can sign of gently guidance in direction nothing. He just wanted to see if he's staring. Zabit off his. That's keeps on walking. Go through that drunk phase. Yes, it's sits in the. Middle Drunkards. Jape gave him some shoes some. Yeah and rupees, old shoes, and other its current all right. We haven't stolen issues if we aren't I gave him back, yeah, okay good. Put them on Satan. It was even more drunken. Is really funny. It's like I said like you see dogs with shoes on. Don't want to do with themselves. A weird ooh! Shoes command trying to walk in high heels. Exactly he doesn't got these kind of. And what the best way to describe them. They were cross between a sock and a plastic bag. Like He's then well. They sort of made from. Like a waterproof coat is made from and like booties book that you put them on the narrow masticated and the end, so they cover your feet. Yeah, a bit like the sword right those blue things you have to put on his swimming pool but bega. Can't. But this. Cozy on the inside, so they could fall like keeping your feet warm. They're not really good for walking on. Concrete or anything, so if if we take him to the park and it's a bit wet. Then Janis willies, since got these kind of weighed booty things. And I made them up in. Yeah, he's got those which. We didn't have those with Donny. For you against shoes, you know we haven't had his feet kind of measured. FOOTLIGHTS JANIS I choose. We went to a shoe shop and got the measured spent lighter equal some light lows Armani. Yeah, they probably have more I can't remember on. Getting so topic. Yes you can measure his feet accurately using a. Does use the Internet. Just just measure them with like like fabric. The sewing tape measure right. You can measure them and then workout conversion using Internet tables and charts and things, and even do like the width and everything we've done. With his latest shoes, right? We just mentioned him. measured him ourselves. And, then when I would go buy them. And you're able to buy cheaper shoes, but. Lightweight those ones that you wearing today I mean they were in the sale we got him for. Fifteen quit. Yes, that was in the sail so expensive so I think they would have been thirty or quit. Right equipped for kids shoes is insane. I pay for equal repair shoes and these ones cost ten. I didn't even get all these given the free. These a freebie shoes from from cousin who gets all of our gear given for note Oh. Yeah, of course. I'm Jay Johnson still. Yeah, so yeah, but he's also got. He's got little. He's wearing the pair converse today right They were like cool shoe. Law Thought Yeah in them, probably crap. Like clocks, and the the good old fashioned cobwebs. Going to be nice logs, read to the saying that you're not supposed to put them in shoes for as long as possible. But I think now needs a moist. Nursery and stuff, but yeah so. They are, but they growl himself fast. Yeah, it's a problem. But lots and lots of old shoes has away way. Usually grow out with them before they get ruined. Oh, definitely yeah. Although I'm going really cool, pair of. Shoes from Tiki box Oh, yeah. Yesterday for FA Johnny. Great bad a picture of a cow on the back of a monster. Really cool though the. You know the addidas shelter Oh the classics of Hip Hop Design Yet But they had like. FRESIAN cow. Patent on the VELCRO straps than a picture of a cow on the back. Great really either want them definitely. But we got. Put Him on wall them for five minutes in the House and sold to start peeling away from the moment tk masks. Food. Good morning, this is Tony Brennan. You're listening to shout radio tally friends, and as you'll have this morning in the news, Ninety nine percent of accidents in the home caused by falling toddlers, and it's time for our hot potato. Should old children being stalled with airbags as standard. Let speak to Alexander Goat. Shadow Minister for Health and safety morning to you Alexander, Gordon and Harrison. Belanger is on the line of Children's fashion designer morning Harrison. Alexander, let me come to you I. You are the Shadow Minister for health and safety so. We need to add the caveat that anything you say is effectively meaningless, but what's made you come up with this idea? Well I was losing. My. Niece or nephew, the other day and one of my niece just kept bagging a had the bloody wall and I mean it doesn't have gotten is but I think it will be much easier for me if they were wrapped in. Bubble? Agassi your clothes, but you just ignore them and they told with your golf. Links or anything it would seem to me Alexander that there is there is a problem here and I wonder if you've thought this through once. Those airbags have deployed wants Presumably you need to reset them. repack them and recharge the explosive that is going to take you a lot of time. Whereas if a child runs into a wall and knocks themself out, that might give you thirty to forty minutes of peace. Stars I understand they would slow there in their there. and. They would stay inflated. pleaded. With part the tide would be would be mobilized. Located. They might fail the cubs just when you finish the nine thousand Obzor Harrison Balaj Ray. This is the children's fashion designer. You're against this idea which surprises me because it. Surely this would be a a new market for fashion design, perhaps something to make money unless your bloody problem. We appoint sir. Bill. To foot. Let it is. To be? A shopping. So. The heads can look like mushrooms. One is a strong argument Alexander. Ed Folklore. Yes so so pineapples aside Harrison I think an Alexander was doing his favorite by speaking in Newell Native Tongue let me see if I can get to the the thrust of your argument 'cause. I'm not quite clear on that. What General James of what you're trying to say. Is. The FAM- You I because it to. As. Cold Jam with Your Dad. And the scene. In the swimming pool. Yeah. I? Think what you're saying. Harrison is you don't agree with air bags because it might cause a problem if you're in the swimming pool with Your Dad, 'cause you'd float, and you might want to swim to the button. Yet. While, it's difficult to argue with that I. Think I've made my mind up as the impartial presenter as a terrible idea. I did agree. I. It doesn't matter though, does it? Minister doesn't matter. Back. Did you use a walker. I, walk? Well. Yeah, so to get get moving. Yeah, well, we. We only use them in. Mum's got plenty of space. and it took him a while, but he got in the end first of all, he just went backwards. Host himself everywhere backwards East to run up and down drive, which was quite good. Get lots of speed up to nothing so yeah east! They used to join with one of those big ones with the with the wheels on the bombings. Yes, in walk. And then a little bit later on progressed onto the pushing type one uh-huh and he looked I still does love those. Nursery of echoes find the neighbors pushed. The little push jazz and pushes about and little and stuff. lows. And We've got. Mungo Emma Little Ride Don. Tractor thing for Christmas cool yeah. But he doesn't ever really say on it. It's rather gets on insists on it, he much. I just push about. And treat it like a massive toy car, so he picks up and put on the southbound night rolls. Taika. Yeah, what else What with Johnny did we had these? Two different walkers One. I think you had the same one because he played that. Choon Oh. Yeah did did it it. Did it. Did it did something that? Twang, the side of it and it played this tune. Jumper Er. Are you know? There's there's Walker. That plays a tune by remember the tune we had one of those and one that you kind of stand in. Again, we had the problem with the the the space. The House also kind of sweeten about one. To try and get any movement going especially either in the living room, we've got quite smooth space in the middle, the sofas and and everything you know around the outside space in the middle and then like. A couple of meters. If you're lucky to get any kind of momentum of or you go up in the bit near the kitchen, and that's got the drop. Yeah, so you don't. You don't you don't want that because we had. We had coffee in the living room before. We don't just got little wooden floor here. Yes so. Yeah and the river. We thought well. We're not going to we we. We heard that you're not meant to use them the workers. Can Encourage tippy toe walking. Yeah, yeah, and no one wants a fancy child. No. He's fantasy. He does actually walk on his tiptoes sometimes, but the time. We at weird walk when he's happy and he's really enjoying himself, he's crouches down and does like a little boom shuffle walk. Buki Walk Wow yeah. When he's really pleased. Got something that he really likes. We said we didn't do anything we just let him. FOR BIGGER HOW HIMSELF Pretty much he kind of. He would come up on. The the the stages are supposedly. They'll they'll start crawling I yeah. And then they're managed to sort of what the way over to a sofa table and pull themselves up here and then they might, if could cruising so work their way along the so around the picking up. In Bushes and stuff. We frowned upon that. is his own man. It moving along the furniture, and then eventually those will turn away and so venture out into the space and missile collapse yet, but they they fool really well. Kids Fall just down down. Down there just saw. That they saw. They're also bounces. The bones made of rubber to. They're not unless you've got. A few drops in your house no, they're not really going to hurt themselves. too much from from just trying to walk. Yeah, yeah, that's it. was he would walk into things and like bashes heads of this. Yes, all of a sudden we are to remove anything. That was a head height. Yes, shop, calmness all. We have to get rid of Coffee Table Yeah Oh, yeah, the. First, thing to go! So one say kind of walk out into the space. Eventually they'll just walk further and further until. The this can properly I think he always takes people by surprise because you get used to them cruising. Yeah, bringing men they don't know. inconsiderate. Yet get used to them. Shuffling along saw tables and stuff from the enter the SOFA and all of a sudden. You didn't really know is, but they want something across the other side of the room, so they just go for it and you don't realize you suddenly go. To have happened slow motion in your mind. To the took. Off. and You wonder how the Hell did you get over there? Then, he see happen again you go. Yeah, yeah so. It's good. And then we tried said that once that happened. We would like to do it. Mama Mama saw playing. Catch. Running back of He. I'm not doing this anymore. Because he didn't really eat, took him a while to build his confidence. To to keep going, he loved it in a couple of times I might. Fall government now I'm not overly sure about this bipedal nature. By pedo. Sounds very dodgy. So. What was funny was Open Tilles point the DOC So we know that got to be can be a little bit funnier around kids. That's fine with an always husband since the beginning. But what it did do was because of course. When ru was crawling about and shuffling around on the floor like A. Shaved slug. and Gas. BOOST CY young fine. This is just you know. It's obviously like a little puppy. Awesome thin on. And then when he stood up and started walking. I'm a monkey new. The dog looks at him. And then look to me. As if to say. You lied to me. You Boston. It's one of you, isn't it? It's another one of another one of you. Shall. Bad When? Child started wall Kim. To the. To the kitchen? And Juno. Gear. And and the. Is Nice Amino me all to get out. And the thing with. Stunning on wall. Tool. Thanking get things. They can turn things old. They turn these also. They can open. Cupboards with Glee. Thanks her injuring. One. Ace better babies. then. Blame you. Well the other good thing when they start walking. It's you can take him to the park. Yes, and they can start to go on the swings slide. The slides were by themselves. Thousand throws yet. He's not co with the slight. Sits on the slide his A. down. Knock over there then he sees Johnny so. There's a lot to be said for the second one. They tend to be more confident and quicker to learn stuff. 'cause they watched the other one realized that the older one isn't dead yet. He's great. He's having a great time. Yeah, whereas he's probably taken John and took johnny longer than it's taken, slip said. Everything's taken logo with with Johnny. But he was also, he was desperate to go on the slide. Yeah, so he kind of willed himself right to to get up there and go down is cold a few few if he's on your knee and you go down. Oh so he doesn't like going down on his own his own to right so if he's only eight loves it. and which he can't get yourself into some sticky such as you you, you frame is not built. Small bottom, but. I'm not very good. Going Down Slides I get stuck. Rubbish. You have to kind of shiftily yourself to the bottom. You know I'm a big hero where we have no one knows it. Knows it. That's all in my mind. That's not about. Work our this in the park opposite the road. There's two slides. If you being to the park a half, but I don't remember. With the one with the smallest slide you got the steps. an you go up a little slow pb in the top where we go downslide and that top bit had was dented so if it rained. It would just fill up with water, so if you if it rained and you went to the pot. Guys. Okay, we'll bring a towel you've managed to kind of. Yeah, get by, but you got that. They sort of sit down in puddle and then down the slide, and then that company mortar. And I went up there one day, and was a guy like a maintenance guy and the council. WHO's fixing swing because there's always kids like the kids from the school? Turning inside out and that's like. penises on it. Though 'cause. It's vandalism the. Traditional traditional. Yeah, you know. Making it, so the swings were of eight for off the ground, and they've got the road. The chains, the a no long, no more than a foot. Good old fashioned fashion sort of throwing. Balls on something. Like Josie. Likes funny. Yeah. This guy doing something and I said to him. Hey, can you you do something about this? Maybe a hammer and knock it flat wherever you not when not show I do as I said it collects all water artist. Drill a few holes in it. You, got this big drill out with. Three holes in whenever it rains Lorraine's this just goes up. It's never it's never been. The here of they started I am. So now when you're in the PUCK, and everybody goes, this is good. Do you go. You'll well suggests that the welcome welcome. But that so that's that's it then. Yeah, that's it. That's it. That's all St enough enough of this enough of this shit. That's that's the end of the run of ten. But he's been a pleasure. Yes. Right feel. About this to now. So thanks very much. Thank you for listening. Both of you. I mean. This is probably to all of the fans. After, we're dead I mean let's face it. This is going to get massive lights there. We're going to be discovered. The we'll both of it by that point, so let's just say you know. We knew we get there eventually. And we appreciate all of the support now. But why couldn't you support it? As was still air. Will, be a? Like. A legacy, his people will find. Yeah, if we're dead, roommate all Johnny Or said. Or you know unnamed future child of mine. Rick? Might. ONS humps. Might, take this and go. Hey, did you don't headed? Into prison. Fort! Don't ask. PUDDLE! Yeah. We used to have to be three brothers. Nice dark way to win here. Lights have gone off. Right, listening like watch. oversubscribing because you know, it's over, that could fit like. Wash, subscribe because Cheryl. Because you never know, they might be somewhere in the future series to know series ten. Let's go I by that.

Johnny Or Alexander Goat NASA Las One Ru Daddy Shack Betty David Beckham imposs Peru Back Bay Harrison Tony Brennan toe walking Harvester Carpark Iris Oakland
When we go to Mars

RNZ: The Detail

21:11 min | 1 year ago

When we go to Mars

"I said the chances of anything coming from MAS according to the one thousand nine. Cpi chief Wayne Musical. But what if way go there? It's not out of the realms of possibility and it's not in the too distant future if you believe president trump now. We must embrace the next frontier. America's manifest destiny in the stars. I am asking Congress to fully fund the RBIS program to ensure that the next man and the first woman on the moon will be American astronauts using this as a launching pad to ensure that America is the first nation to play flag or lars. Emil Donovan Today on the detail. We're going into stealth within the next fifty one hundred years. I think it's certainly feasible. At least it's not science fiction anymore. We're not there yet. We're not launching people to Mars tomorrow but it's absolutely not science fiction anymore. Chelsea goat is a journalist for space DOT COM and. She's thinking far into the future. She's written a piece called how to die on MAS. It's not a how to end the traditional sense. Rather it's a team to fill in a blank. How will we deal with the situation? If and when it crops up Chelsea talked to a bio engineer and a fashion designer who combined to develop a multi layered garment that would serve as a mas burial shroud. She accompanied them to a tasting spot atop a huge volcano in Hawaii with the terrain mimics the surface of the planet in every culture on Earth. We have death rituals and so it seems logical to think that humans living on Mars but also adopts some kind of death ritual. You know people here. Don't just toss. They're dead randomly into graves. They have different practices behaviors rounding death. And then the second part of it is Mars is what's called aseptic so you know as far as we know there's no life on Mars There's no bacteria in the ground. That's going to decompose a body if you put it in there so if you toss a body out on Demars or try to bury it it's probably just GonNa mummify and get irradiated and so obviously I mean there's nothing saying you couldn't do that but it's you know however morbid this may sound it's kind of a wasted opportunity And that's what these researchers are kind of looking into is not only what the ritual part of death on Mars might be like but how to actually kind of harvest not to be weird to heart. Spent the the natural resources of the human body so they don't go to waste just mummifying out on the surface of Mars. I mean this is sort of a solution to an issue that we don't really face years right like humans are not on Mars at the moment but the fact that we are starting to fill in some of these more speculative blanks suggests these issues. They might actually crop up in lifetimes. Oh definitely I mean. We're not that far off from landing humans on Mars or returning humans to the moon and even if everything goes according to plan and nothing goes wrong and they land safe and sound. That's dangerous place to live. We're not sure if people we send there were going to be able to bring them back so sending people to Mars you have to consider. What are you going to do when they pass away? It was designed by a fashion design researcher She's named PIA and she doesn't deal just with this project but she deals in designing death garments in general and so her and researcher. Jj Hastings kind of got together. And Dr Inter Landy. She kind of thought I what material it would have to be. And then how many layers it would have to be. She wanted to make it beautiful but she wanted it to be practical and so the garment itself is the number of layers that are for practical purposes very easy to put onto the body. So it's not some stiff polyester a government that you have to squeeze somebody into their relatively easy to put on a dead body and then they're also you know. Obviously she's a designer. They're they're beautifully made. They're very aesthetically pleasing again. Part of that ritual process But they're also all made of Silk and silk comes from silkworms and it is protein and the reason that she chose that is because in the different methods that her and Jj Hastings are kind of looking at that could be used to kind of decompose or kind of Dissolve a body on Mars. The clothing that the person would be wearing would also have to be able to go through that process and so you know. She made a garment using silk protein material. So that it could also be dissolved or processed along with the body itself. So they wouldn't have to take it off or any such thing. Humans have been fascinated by mass since the dawn of civilization but how realistic is the prospect of settling the planet? It's freezing cold. There are no signs of life these no running water hostile. Well depends who you ask here at. My Name's Leeann Griffin. I'm the director of the talk medium but I'm also an astronomer. How close are human beings right now to seating foot on Mars? Well we certainly don't yet have the technology in place to be able to get human. Tomorrow's hold up what why is Elon? Musk telling us this in the year. Two Thousand Twenty. Four SPACEX aims to send the first humans to Mars fifty five years after man. I set foot on the moon. Strap yourselves in. We're going to Mars. Not just a few astronauts. Thousands of people are going to colonize Mars. And I am telling you that they're going to do this soon. Well the simple answer is it's complicated. There's a lot going on Particularly in the private sector through space expert also Nassar a starting to build rockets capable of leaving Earth orbit which has been a problem for us. Since the end of the Apollo program in the nineteen seventies so in theory and there are some pretty ambitious targets spacex saying that they might get to tomorrow's by twenty twenty four which I think is very ambitious. Indeed it's certainly on the horizon but there are some S- some technical challenges to overcome. I think it's just a matter of time. Money Technology. The technology is being developed and it takes time and it takes money to test it and so I'm sure that process could be rushed in. It could be thorough bunch of money at it in expedited But that wouldn't be necessarily safe. So we have to take the time to develop the technology correctly while at the same time working with governments in space agencies to ensure that the people who will be on board will be absolutely safe. Nobody's really demonstrated the ability for taking humans. That far away from the earth you could have life support systems in place that can keep the humans alive for several years at least during the time to get to Mars and the time to come back from ause. Now we've demonstrated that in the space station. Which has been continuously inhabited since two thousand so we know we can keep humans living inciting cans for a long time So that part of the challenges is certainly Overcome but We could get people to Mars. We gotta get them from orbit around Mars to the surface and when they're on the surface you've got to protect them and if they can live on Mars than we need to figure out ways of growing things on my own and getting water from the ground MAS and basically protecting ourselves from the really hostile environment on that planet in presumably. You're familiar with the article. This pace kind of took inspiration from about deep comments and how the issue of death on Mazda in spice might be approached if we Filling in the blanks to questions like this. We probably a lot closer to this. Being a reality then many people would think absolutely there's nothing technically other than investment of time and effort. That really is stopping us. Getting Tamaz at the moment once you can do something and you've got the desire to do it. Then that's been kind of. I would call the ethical stuff worrying about okay if someone dies in space. How do you deal with the body? Leave them decay on spaceship What's the burial ritual? And all that kind of material stuff that comes out the fact that actually is quite likely we are going to go to Mars and and from my perspective. You know there's some other challenges are equally interesting for example because the speed of light is finite if you are on. Mars the closest distance between Earth and Mars means that it will still take three minutes for a message that you send to reach earth so if you send a message saying help. The spaceship is blowing up mission. Control won't hear that three minutes so you really on your own. And that's when Mars is closest when Mars is furthest from the Earth. You takes twenty two minutes each way so it's going to be forty minutes before you get an obscene back to try and help you so so you really are on your own on this planet and you're going to have to be able to solve problems and challenges without access to Earth and that really does put you and every other human that planet in a completely different environment suit most other human experiences. I guess the closest thing you can think of Antarctica. It's it's really hard to understand how hostile this environment is. Because Mars doesn't have a magnetic field for example there's a lot more solar radiation that comes to the surface. So you're going to be unless you're inside a cave protected from the the environment. You're going to have radiation hitting your body and that's going to impact on you Some studies that saying that going to Mars is going to significantly increase your chances of getting cancer. Especially if you're a woman this is because women have more body. Parts that are affected by radiation like breasts. Ovaries a womb. It's a really hostile environment and living there. it's going to take a particular sort of maybe call it a pioneer spirit to to be able to make life and live on a planet like that where literally you can't go outside and take a deep breath of fresh air. Need them on the reality? I'm leaving straight onto that spaceships. Ibom bartered altitude space experts with questions. About what would happen win? We get the questions. Like a few minutes did Celia. Who'd be in charge? I'm guessing that the first mission to Mars would probably be some kind of military come NASA type thing where they would be a commander and I'm imagining that that commander would be in charge. I mean In terms of government. I mean once you start colonizing the place which is what we're talking about here I think that's something that I don't think there's been much work done on it. Certainly not something. I'm familiar with but you can remember. I'm an astronomer. Not Somebody does government Science all politics but certainly the first expeditions. There will be under the command of the mission commander and I would imagine that. S- that commander will be delegated to have authority to make decisions and the crew will have to trust the students that are made. Would it be possible to grow food on mass in my opinion theoretically yes in the actual Martian soil? I don't know I know that NASA I don't know about other space agencies but I know that there are such as the veggie experiment there are a number of experiments that are kind of testing this So they're using kind of analog soils to test growing things and then whether or not they're able to grow in the actual Martian soil itself on the space station they have this little experiment called Veggie where they grow vegetables totally grown in space. They eat them there All different types of vegetables in foods and so whether or not they're able to actually plant anything the ground they should definitely be able to grow things. In contained experiments like veggie. If we do end up settling moss how might it be? Divided up in terms of territorial authority is this is a question that also relates to space. Who Own Space? Yeah that's a really good question Under the Outer Space Treaty at the United Nations companies aren't allowed to own planets and But I guess if you our country and you have the ability to get to a planet you can certainly raise your flag there. Which is what the Americans did low. They said they came in peaceful mankind. Of course time now of course a Mars territories a bit of a misnomer because there's no real liquid water so it's pretty much one landmass and I would imagine that if there are different countries sending different missions to Mars. You might end up having some kind of government for some kind of division that way but to be honest to get to Mars is GonNa take contributions from lots of different countries to get there so. I think it's going to be something that's going to be more akin to Suva planetary government media stuff used to read about in Star Trek with the Federation one of the Megan scale ideas. That's been proposed about how minds might be utilized involves a tune called terra owning. Can you tell me a little bit about the idea of tier reforming and how it works? Yes so tara forming this conceptual idea that you can kind of manipulate a planet to be different so you could influence Mars. In a way that gave it more of an atmosphere returned some of its atmosphere and made more habitable to humans And kind of made Mars more earth like and there are a lot of different researchers. Continue to investigate whether or not. This is possible in how they would do it. There countless ways. That people have thought about doing this but there have also unfortunately been a lot of studies that show that while tear forming kind of small regions. Might be possible. Tear forming a whole planet. Even if it's possible which it may it may or may not be. I don't know even if it's possible might not be the most efficient way to go about living on Mars. This brings up huge ethical questions narrow because even mentioned if we did develop technology to the point where tear reforming is or colonizing. Mars with large numbers of people was feasible. Is that really the right thing to do? That's a great question. I think that's why people are even shying away from the turn colonization in in favor of other terms such as settlement because colonizing Mars even using that term. It reminds us of what we've done on earth in kind of how we've Nesta in taking land from other people or just taking over space in general in looking back and realizing how badly we've messed up and so I think people are starting to slow down and take a look at well. What should we be doing. Should we be taking over this other planet? Should we be sending tons of people there to live forever just for exploratory missions And so I don't really have an answer on that. I think it's something that we have to just continue to consider and really be careful to kind of look back at our own history and where we've messed up and make sure that we don't make the same mistakes on another planet other useful things on Moslem. We stand to gain anything beyond just expanding the area in which humans can Levin. Well I think They're all mineral resources. Of course so that we can possibly use to support industries either or Mazal or on earth and I suppose you know. Ultimately the future of the human race depends on us becoming an interplanetary species because let's face it The Earth has a finite future So whatever happens in about five billion years. The song's going to swell up and swallow the earth. So by that time we've got to figure out how to get away from our planet or with we kind of doomed so they're also other things that can happen to the earth we know. Big Asteroid destroyed the dinosaurs about sixty five million years ago so actually being able to have life off world potentially could survive a disaster. Like it's good for our species so in that sense. It's a good thing to be able to do this. But with all the caveats have said you know that wouldn't be something. Choose to do as a human being to spend the rest of my life in a place like Mars. Because even though it's fascinating visit it's a cold airless world the Would be quite a lonely place to be. I think sorry much of Human Tina Logical Development Chelsea begins either begins. Its Life Will. Ends up being appropriated for the purpose of warfare and I think the American Prison Donald Trump in fact just a few months ago officially launched the American Space Force program. This this could really this catoon into Ari'el Pandora's box if we're not careful yeah I it's it's very two sided so aside you know my my personal feelings on the disastrous political situation This just just focusing in on space force. I think that there is definitely a danger. For having it become weaponized in having space become militarized and and having it become kind of this violent playground and on the other hand that does seem to be some kind of need for at least an increased regulation and just monitoring to make sure what's going on in space is nefarious. Isn't you know. No one's no one's doing anything wrong. Which is much different from decades past today. We have thousands of satellites in orbit around Earth. Communications satellite spy satellites satellites collecting data monitoring taking images And so those satellites are extremely valuable and transmit and collect extremely sensitive and extremely valuable data. And so while. It's extremely important that we make sure that we are not a weaponized space in militarising space. That careful consideration is taken to keep monitoring and keep making sure that space remains a peaceful place where science and exploration is at the forefront. Just because he can't doesn't mean you should and there is a big question here right. Seems like I mean. It's probably been oversimplified decide that humans destroyed earth destroying Earth But the ethics of literally call is another planet are Complicated absolutely and we all know. Colonization had an impact to this day in this country and We're still dealing with the impact of that now of course malls as far as we know it doesn't Piper advanced civilizations possibly the most advanced thing there is a micro but you know there is an ethical question about. Should we be doing this as a species and Personally I think it's worth doing. Simply for overcoming. The technical challenges are going to. We're going to learn a hell of a lot about being able to do it. Going to Mars exploring understanding if there is life there. How evolved is going to tell us more about where we come from them whether life is common elsewhere in the universe. So they're really fundamental questions and to my mind. That's the reason for going to Mars. The reason is to to explore it to understand it and not necessarily live there I think probably the ultimate goal is you know one of the great philosophical questions of humanity is. Is there life out there other than us and while Mas may have free simple life it might help us understand the chances they're being more advanced life elsewhere in the in the sodas or even on planets around other stars so so as an astronomer and that's what drives my passions but I'm sure they're equally interesting questions. The governance of planets and wants to been colonized. And that's something I'll leave to the the experts in politics. Do you think that humans will foot on Mars in your lifetime? I definitely do. I don't think I'll be super young in spry when it happens but I absolutely think that within my lifetime I think within the next fifty one hundred years. I think it's certainly feasible. That's the detail was a day. I'm meal Donovan. The detail is brought to you by newsroom. Dot Co Dot N. Z. And made possible by our endings. Hit the subscribe button to stay across the detail every day. And if you're on ankle please leave. Us of writing is it helps other listeners. Find US space space warfighting domain just like the land. This episode was engineered by Jeremy Ansell and produced by Alexia Russell and thanks to Chelsea goad and Ian Griffin Muttawa.

Emil Donovan SPACEX Jj Hastings NASA Chelsea goat Hawaii America Chelsea president Cpi Congress US Wayne Musical Mazda engineer Dr Inter Landy Leeann Griffin United Nations Mas
Naomi Shihab Nye reads 300 Goats

The Poetry Magazine Podcast

07:06 min | 2 years ago

Naomi Shihab Nye reads 300 Goats

"This is the Poacher magazine podcast. I'm producer Rachel James with an archival edition of the show Niamey Shehab Ni- has been named the Poetry Foundations Young People's poet laureate. She's written and edited more than thirty thirty books of poetry and pros including some books for young adults. The podcast is hosted by Don share editor of Poetry magazine and Lindsey Garbage Associate editor there joined in discussion by Christina Pugh consulting editor. Take this week will feature nuys poem in January Two Thousand Sixteen issue of poetry. The poem is called three hundred goats this past year I had just returned from China where there was a lot of talk. Talk about the animal of the Zodiac according to the Chinese Zodiac last year two thousand fifteen was the year of the sheep or was it the year of the goat apparently the Chinese word for sheep also includes the goat family and it seems this past year. There's also been a lot of discussion about human behavior. Perhaps we always have that but these things converged as I was speaking to my friend. Shero Clayton from West has Texas. Here's the palm three hundred goats in icy fields is water flowing in the tank. Will they huddled together warm bodies pressing. Is it the year of the goat. Vote or the sheep scholars debating Chinese Zodiac follower or leader. Oh lead them to a warm corner little ones toward bulkier bodies lead them to the brush which cuts the icy wind another frigid nights swooping down. Aren't you worried about them. I asked my friend who lives by herself. On the ranch of Goat's far from here you're near the town of ozone a- she shrugs not really they know what to do. Their goats noticing that a lot of poems that addresses <unk> a logical issues have questions in them fittings a lot of questions here I like that the poet is asking questions instead of being some kind of a source of wisdom without any help. I like the idea you did. A poet in the landscape isn't just recording it but it has to ask questions of people and you know the titles about three hundred goats. There's all these goats kind of a multiplication thing. That serve makes you realize that the fruitfulness of the earth is substantial so that it's not just that a goat as to do but that altogether this burgeoning community of Goat's together know what to do in a way that surpasses our own over praised you could say wisdom about what goes on the World Yeah Yeah. It seems to me that the poem is having a little bit of fun especially at the end with the idea that poems and poets are always personifying anthropomorphized saying the natural world in ways. Is that <hes> the natural world may not need you know they know what to do. Their goats and that also seems to me something that Echo justice poetry is concerned about is the idea of the liberties taken by a particularly the lyric poem in terms of you know having that sort of authority that you were talking about over the natural world not questioning it hurting back to the Romantics and so on and the there's something kind of wonderfully under fleet comic about it that I realized when back to the numeral in the title three hundred goats almost like you know one hundred down so it's interesting that it is three hundred three hundred one because like you know how are you going to count votes in the sense you would if you if they were your goats but yeah but there's something very wry about that exactly the sort of how you count or account for the multiplicity these creatures. Here's one thing that I that sort of caught my eye you sort of connect the dots as you move through a poem in backup it's lines and you know the part about the scholars debating Chinese Zodiac and follower or leader and sort of connected with me a little a bit with the town of Ozone Ah because in a certain sense a lot of our awareness of looming crisis in the environmental sense owes itself to concerns many decades ago but the ozone layer yeah but I I didn't know there was a town of ozone. It's it seemed like a great coincidence effect for there was one you know those pretty nice touch but the the sort of Z's and Os and as of Ozone Zodiac it's almost like. Anagram or something like that it sounds very loose the lines but it's actually very cleverly assembled yeah I was thinking a lot about that scholars debating Chinese Zodiac section to about follower or leader the way that Naomi said that this poem for her kind of converged with human behavior in the past year about whether we are followers or leaders and then she follows that with Oh lead them to a warm corner little ones funds toward bulkier bodies lead them to the brush which cuts the icy wind a raise the same questions for me that you mentioned Christina. Are we really supposed to lead them. They're goats. They should know what to do but that's sort of our human impulse. Aren't you worried about them. I asked my friend who lives by herself. On the ranch of Goat's far from here near the town of ozone a- she shrugs not really they know know what to do their votes you can read three hundred goats by Naomi Shehab Ni- in January a two thousand sixteen issue of poetry or online at Poetry magazine Dot Org you can also read the magazine and listen to this podcast on our mobile APP. It's free to subscribers or if you're not a subscriber and you really should be one. You can purchase an issue in the APP itself. Look for the Poetry magazine APP in the APP store and on Google play. Let us know what you thought of this program email us at podcast at Poetry Foundation Dot Org and please linked to.

Poetry magazine Goat editor Poetry Foundation Dot Org Naomi Shehab Ni Christina Pugh Ozone Ah Poacher magazine Niamey Shehab Ni Lindsey Garbage Associate Shero Clayton producer Rachel James nuys Texas China Google
Ep. 688: Goat Snatch with Dave Hill

Jesse, Jordan, GO!

1:31:16 hr | Last month

Ep. 688: Goat Snatch with Dave Hill

"Give a little time for the childhood in you. Don't be afraid to be young and free under the lock central away the keys and take caucus and sex and run you jordan jesse go. I'm jesse thorn in the midst of a neighborhood council meeting jordan morris goat prudhomme while so it sounds like we both have great stuff to present on this week's program. This is going to be jam packed episode a while. I am recording this jordan. Jesse go i am also attending a neighborhood council meetings. That is two things you can do it once. Because that's what i'm doing multitasking. Yeah it's really exciting. They're they're approving funding resolution for helmets for youth football program. And i'm actually. I'm i'm multitasking. To i am recording this podcast and dick and around on instagram. So we're both doing important ship. Yeah during what's this goat. Talk well i just you know me. I'm i'm i'm not i'm even call me uptight. Would you would that be a way. You would describe me as a chill so calabro. Well jill so cal dude. Chill so cal. Yeah the and. I feel like it's important to draw the extinction between dude and bro. Yeah maybe that's something we can get into with our guest. Yeah so you know you know. I like you know a blue blue joke. A raunchy joke like a blue christmas sure like a blue. I love blue balls. I love going home. The sexually unsatisfied. Yeah if it's blue. I'll take it. That's my my general blanket policy for life. But i found myself kind of shocked at some at some ribald jokes recently. Wow and was really surprised at myself. I was really surprised at the reaction that i had. And this would all these. These jokes these These raunchy r. rated jokes took place at goat. Yoga hold on what were these goats saying. Okay as i mentioned before. It wasn't a ghost. Jessie this was humans. Okay goats can talk. Though you know that. Right i know. And that's actually one of my complex. Credit goes yoga. But you know. I think this is a story as old as time. You know. The real monster in this case was man. Thank you in a lot of the great stories. you know. Franken stein and Predator no never mind the monsters predator. It's true but i had frankenstein's a good example frankenstein's of solid example. I don't need more fitzcarraldo. sure. I guess corralled. Oh you'd think the monster is now quote writes the boat the mount anyway. So i you know. Listen as i mentioned. I'm on insta. i'm new to instant. So i'm like i'm late to this party. Why don't i do an instagram trend. From five years ago and attend yoga an outdoor yoga session where goats jump on you. Like you're a little iraq and jordan. I should mention here. Just in the interest of full disclosure to instant mash potatoes. But we can table that and get back to the goats. sure yeah. Is that what you consider to be. An instant means to me. I'm a geriatric millennial so so you so you have someone could slide into your mp your machinate party score bright's so okay. So i was like okay. I'm i'm new to town. I wanna do some outdoor activities. I wanna do something fun. I cited a while ago that i hate yoga. But you know. I thought this was a fun enough Looking activity that. I should do it. Would taking place at the gamble house love like historic legendary craftsmen home in japanese may. I don't know how that's pronounced. J. a. p. o. n. i s. e. style attribute spectacular. Join ary known known the world over for its jaunary. Love it by the way jordan for our at home audience in case they don't know you hate yoga because one time. You farted in yoga. That's true no no. It was a shark. Yeah so really really killed so were. Were getting the intro to this goat yoga from goat yoga instructor who is a very standard issue. Nice like goat mid fifties. The only love to be like was amazed amazed no tonight mid fifties like standard yoga lady. Very nice and her husband. Was there like wrangling. The goes so she's explaining so she's like the goats may come over to your matt and they might they might take a little pooh but in goat yoga. We call that. We call that blessing and i was like sitting there. Like fucking gross. Fucking grossed out by this by the idea that these these circular goat turds were blessing. So i'm like alright okay. That didn't work on me. But then she's introducing us to all the goats so she's like these are the goats this is felix. This is little bit in. This is fanny farm girl. And if i'm not careful my husband is going to run away with fanny farm girl worked up. And i'm like to myself that's even fucking grosser shit on the mat. Being called a blessing. Your husband is gonna fuck this. Don't my husband was traveling. It was dark knight and he needed somewhere to stay a kind farmer offered that he could play in the farmer's barn. Anyway last girl fanny farmers and like and why would. Why would the husband make this kind of mistake. He has a wonderful wife. Who who's jokes. I don't enjoy but you know. She teaches yoga. She wrangles goats. This is he doesn't realize what a good thing he has here. And the fact he would fuck it all up just for a chance at some sweet goats. I'm sorry i'm sorry to go there. But that's where that's where that's where the bar is. That's where she went. Jeez the was there. She lives there jordan. For fuck sake. I'm a prude now. I don't like blue humor. The only joke. I like when steve harvey makes a face during family feud and that's a critique of blue humor so it fits in with my whole thing so yeah let's let's have no more raunchy jokes on this show let's keep it. Pg because apparently. I can't handle it anymore. Sorry jordan were you blessed or i missed that part of the story now. Goat didn't shit on my man. But wow blessings things to you in the future friend and i must stay agreed the god within you. I was in the house. The join ary body the joyner. It was nice. Joyner was nice. Yeah so i think it all worked out in the andrey the goats probably out there. You go carefully. Manicured lawn and fanny farm. Grills are pretty good name for. I don't think people should joke about bucking. Yeah because it's a they should an animal can't provide consent there you go. That's just one of the many reasons they also can provide consent to being named fanny farmgirl which seems important this specific konya let the goats name themselves. They're all just named disturbingly. Human scream can eater and let's not morph that into a joke about eighty. Ask because someone might want that. I would do that because as we have established i do not like gross humor like i wouldn't do that. Despite being geriatric millennial the way. Because i was born in nineteen eighty one. It's just i'm very. i'm just confused. You just have a lot of problems with confusion. Take a lot of iron supplements exactly. Should we introduce our guest on the program. I would love. Oh this man is a jordan. Jesse go favourite. But it's been a few years. You might remember him from the battle of the dave hill's an all time classic jordan. Jesse go episode. You might know him from the dave hill. Good our you might know him. As one of the kings of black metal you might know him as a contributor to put this on the video series from ten years ago you might know him just from seen around new york city and thinking. Who's that handsome devil. Dave hill is with us. Hello dave it's a joy to have you here. I'm thrilled to be here. You know. I was just i get asked about my My tenure with put this on frequently i was. I was admiring the bench that you acquired the antique bench. Oh thank you jordan. I don't mean to brag here. This isn't a venue for me to brag. But yesterday my youngest frankie and i went not grocery store shopping garage sale shopping sorry geriatric millennial and we bought a couple of benches for ten and fifteen dollars respectively real nice antique benches but pretty parched. So i took him out on the porch and hit him with some feed in wax. I know jordan that that's an opportunity for you to talk about eating. But i'm just going to let that pass. No i don't. I don't go in for that kind of i know that you don't you don't like being blue. Thank you dave you jordan on on the put this on episode. The dave was on We went to the annual convocation of the corduroy society. Yes she's an organization Dedicated to quarterly the fabric of the king. I was the speaker there on spoke on the topic of corduroy. Dave went to do sort of field segment there. At the event. Dave war all velvet velvet being the sworn enemy of corduroy. I think actually. I think there was a greater violation as i recall. I wore corduroy pants velvet jacket. Which i i think informed by you that it was i couldn't have i couldn't have made a bigger air. Yeah i mean the real problem here is dave doesn't have any non velvet jackets i try. Try not to. I'm really struggling with this warmer weather. And i you know. I i do. I have a couple of pairs of corduroy pants to cleaners right now. But with velvet you know velvet people reach out and touch you. They give you a consensual. Pat like one might a goat or a goat snatch consent to that. Just because i said it earlier if somehow i don't think i've ever heard the words goat snatch in right next to each other like that david. We don't do blue humor on this podcast anymore. I i know. I know but i'm just i just We can edit this out but But i'm grateful and I'm i will be repeating those words together for the rest of my days. The if you're if you're black metal band which taint breaks up. I've already thought the side project would be goats. believe. I'm working on the t shirts. I would say that i should i could. I could play with you and go snatch. But i don't think drumming is technical enough no no passion is all you need. Yeah i have it in spain. Yeah that's i know you do. Dave is a ripping guitarist. He had a number of different music careers parallel to his comedy career which taint may be the most successful of all of them involves him wearing black metal makeup and ripping out sweet solos which he does sometimes on instagram and so forth. And i'm sure i'm always stunned at the the technicality and precision of a sweet axe work. I have to ask you a question because subscribed to a read it and this is the segment Where i just list a weird read. That i looked at i i subscribe to a read. It call hoppy drama and this is a really like sometimes it's too upsetting for me but When i'm feeling strong emotionally a look at this and it will just be like a three thousand word treatise on shit that's going down in the world of crocheting and like really raw shit like people flipping the fuck out like sometimes it's sex stuff. You know what i mean. Sometimes it's just like It's just like you know dildo drama in a kink community but often it's crocheting or something like that and my understanding is that there is a fair amount of drama in the black metal community. I was wondering if you've heard about any of this drama on people who may or may not Reject wearing makeup and whether they are actually black metal some some differences between european and american styles of black metal. What's what's going on conflict wise. Give us the t. dave. Oh i'm glad you asked. Well i i'm not afraid to spill the t. On this one the thing with black metal. That's really important. Is to take yourself very seriously and so i take myself i. I respect myself as an authority in north america. And then there's just like a handful of guys in scandinavia and then the enthralling my phone. I've actually weirdly. I've met several of the Norwegian black metal guys in my in my travels none of the murderers right. No i did meet a guy who i met. I would have really appreciated a more emphatic. No way murderer it. I have met i have had gall. If you're in the black metal your ears are perking up right now. He was a singer in gore gross. And i met him in germany when which taint played at the vakhin festival. And i dave. I love every word. You're saying right now. And i want you to know it was it was i. I had unfortunately already taken off my corpse paint. And i i'd come back from. I think i'd come back from you. Know you get you get access to the buffet once a day. Not gonna let you just go ape. Shit yeah i think i think maybe just come from lunch and we detour detour a little bit. Can you tell us about the buffet at volkan. Is it how metal. Would you say the buffets. I have to say no no joking. The vakhin festival in germany. Which is the biggest heavy metal festival in the world. It was the best run most delightful ab- well. Let's say best run. I anything. I've ever seen like better run than any hospital. I've been in better run than us anything like i was. I was there for four days. No-one there was no trash anywhere. No one like rubbed up on me. You know like no big sweaty guy rubbed against me and made me feel discomfort. I know it was really. You could get you get margarita pizza whenever you want it. was you know. Let me stress to this was in the this was in the artist. The real this is where i met gall the backing up to gaul gol. He was in prison because this is some time ago. Probably ten years ago at least A guy went back to his house like after the bars people into his house to hang out and offended him in some way and he started beating torturing him in the guy was bleeding and he gave him a cup to bleed into because he didn't want him to bleed on his carpet horrible. You know sure all these years later we all have a big laugh. yes but Yeah so he not a murderer but pretty intense guy. If you scroll way way back in my instagram you can see us. i'm smiling. He's not an and it was about eighty degrees and he was wearing a need length like a a leather duster a power move in in the middle of summer. I would argue dave in the medical community or specifically in the death metal communion. You can separate those into separate numbers you know. What percentage of performers are cheese in in a selfie. So like if if somebody fan grabs a shoulder and says. Do you mind if we take a picture together. And extends that telephone. What percentage of performers cheese she. Now what do you mean by cheese. In showing their teeth you know giving it given given a big wide smile. Hey i'm glad i'm glad you asked. I none of them. None of them are choosing. But i will tell you. So when i saw colin giddy like fa fanny farm it was getting his fanny farmer. And so i ran over to get a picture in my girlfriend. Having no idea who this guy was was just like you need to ask him like she could. He was emanating this. I've been in prison for giving a guy a cup to bleed into. He had this vibe with that the crime. I'm not familiar with the penal codes in scandinavia. It's very is norwegian penal code so no smiling there. But then i was in your town los angeles probably ten years ago. I had just gone to see jimmy. Kimmel live in person. I love to do. Hollywood things one. I'm in hollywood. You guys know this about me. Sure and go to see. Go to grauman's chinese. I do it all ripley's believe it or not museum. I'm going done all the universal tours. Do the whole thing and i'm on hollywood would be hollywood boulevard and i see two guys from the norwegian black metal band immortal and i'm talking to my My friend jill. And i say oh my gosh. That's immortal system. That and i said as norwegian black metal mench says. Will you have to get your photo with emma mike now now and because we're chatting she's like you have to like you're the only person that would possibly recognize these two guys from norway walking down how we both are dave. Yeah dave was because they were wearing spiderman suits. Yes yes no. I think there were two spiderman that day because i remember thinking i remember telling jill that was why never moved to la. 'cause you want it to be the only spider man in town i don. I don't want the competition. I think my fear is i. would i would be. That would be me and say within six months you would just resort to dressing up like a character and taking pictures straight to spider man costume. No i mean it's a great. It's a great part of living in l. a. It's a kind of insurance. You know like if if you know show business is slow or if your project falls apart like you can always just like jack sparrow it up out there for a couple days and make rent dame who recognize these norwegians without their corpse makeup. Yeah they didn't yet because they normally wear that. So i chase after them and i start saying hey immortal immortal. They are really figure. There's two guys. I'll just say the one word they'll react to that. They were really confused. And they're looking at me. I said you guys are immortal. And they were like. Oh yeah so then. I you know i said. Can i get a picture my friend. Jill took a photo but before we took the photo they were. you know. They're all smiling friendly. They put their sunglasses on and they really are. They anti chief i smile. And you cheap fanny farm go. Oh yeah you absolutely. I love the thought that these two guys from norwegian black metal band come to l. a. and then just like. Hang out on hollywood boulevard by the wax museum in the buffalo hollywood museum pee wee. Herman's bike yeah. They're they're no different. The same as they loved glitz and the glamour. Dave you met any other black metal celebrities on hollywood boulevard that you'd like to tell us about. Oh i'm glad you asked Just those guys actually. Okay thank you dave. I guess i don't know this. Were you a metal kid growing up. Yeah i mean. Then as now. I mean i'm i'm i'm i've always been like really omnivorous with music. You know obviously you know. Having which taint people people look to me for matters of metal. But you know. I'm arguably more of like a power pop big star type guy. Cheap trick you know valley lodge. My main ban is more fun in the sun. Seventies driving in your car with the top down music. So where did the corpse paint. Come in. Because i i am interested to know you have these two zero alive. I think Well which ten the thing with which you know valley lodge. You know we've been doing that for. I can't even believe how long like fifteen years. Now i think and our songs john oliver theme song not break but just for reference for the puja or just like the the magic valley lodge is known as of us but everyone is hurt us. Yeah now we're talking. Now we're talk. We should mention by the way that a witch taint song is the jimmy kimmel which is where over there true. No the thing the thing with which team you know as as you might know you know it started with me like in too early two. Thousands may just trolling before. I even knew it. Trolling was pretending to be this kid. Lance with a band called witch taint. And i was emailed a norwegian black metal record label in you know had not recorded a note of music or told anyone in the world but this thing existing in my head and i was emailing with this guy for six months and you can read all these emails. They're real emails at the black metal. Dialogues dot com like of blah blah. Anyway so they were on the internet for years and kind of had this following and then we started my friend. Phil and i- castillo. We started reading them on stage by friend. Trish nelson was like. He's them onstage Did it in people loved it but then we went to vakhin in germany in. This is when we're still just a do also and people were just so confused. Like what are these guys doing. And you know 'cause we would. It was a comedy show but there was music in it and even when would put on the flyer like this is a comedy show. It's not a band and then finally. Like oh dave you're musician too so this is the band. I'm like no. It's not a ban. i do play guitar in it. But then they'd anyway. I i even had. I won't say who this was. Because i don't want theirs but i we did the viper room in in your town out there and a friend was like hey can i Come out to the show tonight gal. Levy a couple of tickets and He wrote he's like. I'm sorry i don't i had to leave. I could only stay for a couple of songs. But i loved it and i was like what we didn't play any songs. What are you like the time we didn't have any songs. We only played one. So it's like this guy trapped himself in a li- like i wasn't even going to follow up with him to ask if he came in then anyway blah blah blah so we were in germany and by then we actually did have some songs But a lot of it was reading these emails on stage. And when you're in a tent full of Germans and people from all over europe And they're just staring at you like what are you guys doing. After the second day of at fill in are like you know what because then we play the music during the show and the place would go crazy. Then we'd be like now. Let us go back and read the emails to you. Not in your native language. Yeah lead with the high energy buick. Follow with even do the northern european black metal bands not read emails. We did this show in oslo the show with the emails and then some the five songs we had written. We did it. All we did in london. We did in oslo in there. Were like black metal guys at the show and stuff. We're really in the belly beast but when we went to germany when we saw crazy everyone went when we played the songs we were like. Well let's just do this. This is awesome and they're just really confused by the other thing we're doing so we just decided to have it be a real band. I like i like the determining factor here was basically Being in a metal band is fun. Yeah it well. it's ridiculous. it is really fun. It's enabled me to indulge in endless addity. How did you okay. Dave important questions so corpse paint is the black and white face designs that that black metal bands wear. This was central to the drama. That i read about on on slash slash hobby drama. There was a ban the had dropped their corpse paint and it was rocking the world of black metal. Yeah when you drop it from without warning you know. It's like anything like when kissed took off their makeup. Everyone's like we don't want that. Put the makeup on we. We want the make this now. That was the cool part of misbehaving exactly. But i'll tell you just the amount of times. I've put on corpse pain at first. Oh so much fun. And then after about the twentieth thirtieth time you're like so now people will ask to do interviews and be like well you do it as lance mike character in the makeup and i'm just like I think you're going to be talking to dave today. What about lance is good friend. Day could read messages from. I'll do interviews as pee wee herman the makeup take. It's it's it stays on your face for like two days and it looks like you're wearing a you look crazy for a couple of days so Do you have to order it from a black metal supply website. This is where it gets really crazy. I hadn't been buying it. Where at ricky's here in new york drag queens by all their makeup and stuff because it really blow black metal is really just a form of drag. So that's why we get it and then they closed scenario am Now i'm now on the deep web the dark web or whatever it's called i hear in the deep state you're in the age you know i wanna tell you during this past year makeup that would just be coming from. God knows where joe's up. It's not right. Lotta supply line issues. It was on that boat in the suez canal. And sometimes what you think what you think you're ordering on. The dark web is corpse paint but actually tearaway. It's a yeah. Yeah sit your bummer. Both make for wild evenings. I can only i can only speak from experience on one of those things but But yeah now. I'm just really It's rough. It's rough out there. Getting corpse paint. I've had a lot of problems. Jordan ordering corpse paint and getting bootleg yeezy. Yee's bri right right. Yeah yeezy brand sneaker shoe. I could see you know the another thing and this is i. Guess what will use to just calm helpful hints or. I guess life hack soon in calling for a while now. Tips from halloween's have some halloween. His shirt pro tips. If you read game pro magazine another thing you can do if you need course fan as you buy just a child's clown makeup set and you just you throw out any of the colors that aren't white black red. You just throw this colors out if there is way. but dave. Can i ask you when you say child's clown makeup do you mean makeup for children's clowns or make up for child clowns this because i think that's been illegal since like the twenties you raise a good point This is a fair point. And i know the legislation. You're speaking of. It was after the tr- the triangle clown waste fire. And here's where you get into portion problems because they only give you enough makeup for a small child's face so you have to buy two. I have a very large irish skull. So i have to buy two child clown makeup kits. Your faces it's a thick daddy. Yeah it really is it. I can take a beating i. I've i've probably jinxing myself. I have not taken a punch since us may be tanner. So but i imagine if we're wanting to come my way i wouldn't even feel it bouncer off bounce right off. There was this. There was a guy in my high school who who was super yoked which. I don't even know how you get yoked in high school. He is a nice guy named paul he wanted to become a firefighter but he boxed on the side and he was like a hsa growth. So get it get on one of those french bread pizzas. They serve you for lunch. I asked paul one time. This is like my most vivid memory from high school. But i asked paul one time. I was like paul. How do you even do that. Like i got hit. Once in it sucked. You know what i mean like. I hated getting punched. And when you box that's like the whole thing. And he told me that will only the first punch hurts. But i don't think that's actually true. I think they probably all hurt. Who do you think would be most likely to punch. You would be most likely. Oh gosh that's a good question. I mean probably the person. I least expect right Here yeah it wouldn't be glut or whatever i'll tell you it probably is the guys who own the restaurant across. The street are probably. Yeah yes name name it. But there's i've turned into a grumpy old man. And i've taken to like calling three one one in sending like passive aggressive emails to the restaurant across the street asking them to just be quiet so i can live my life over here because they they have a festive kind of south beach thing going. And that's you that's volume you. Gotta so like pit bulls. They're riffraff is in her polling. Forget its tonal traffic and so No i've been getting into it. Because i live in the west village in new york. And it's very it's like the french quarter for like millennial brunches and like they'll be end end dinner folks the dinner crowd but they'll be there had been but i think brunch like think i say i think i understand what your issue is when you say that you have printers in the neighborhood. Yeah yeah it's hard to take on bridge with someone having dinner but it's easy to To wanna brunch but But then there's marching bands and i had to write a m- the this marching band. That comes around. 'cause they had their all their social media handles on like the tuba as walking. My dog and i wrote them. I actually had to rewrite it. Because i sent them like a d m and it was like a little harsh. I deleted it then i wrote him another one. I was like that. Still a little harsh and i just then i. Finally we talked it out. I said hey you know. Could you not come round after seven ever again. And they're like well. That sounds really early to be saying. We shouldn't be playing marching bands to be fair are usually a daytime ban. It is probably the most daytime of all bands. Yeah i could thought of a marching band playing after two pm shopping. I think he would seem not raw. Let not rhyme. maybe i. Maybe i'm not the they're they're really only about five of them but you can tell they're part of a larger operation the deep state. Yeah exactly not so. I said seven o'clock because that is when new york city law says things like marching bands and all that need to stop also very few are. If you're saying this is old managed behavior very old managed to know the that the quiet hours so sad because and i even said i said look guys if it were up to me i'd be saying thirty but the law on the books. Wake up much as the next guy. I want to hear talk tonight. I mean which taint okay. So i know about. Oh believe me. I i didn't i didn't branch but i you know they. They did say like well. You know it's really hard for musicians. And i did pull that. Hey i get it. I'm i'm a rocker to i did i. Did i tell them. I play the susan. I know they play. Are they playing. Like a marceca's and do they have one of those ladies that throws a stick in the air and know they're more like it's. They played like britney spears covers. They play covers of popular songs and then they go from restaurant to restaurant all the people eating outside people. This is the problem drunk people on the. They'll just start screaming. No matter what it's it's it's upset you know. And i think what's happening. Is that if you are specifically choosing britney spears songs you are deliberately riling up the brunch i because i think nothing will throw a brent scher into a frenzy among fueled frenzy like a britney's exactly if they were out there playing like kinks record village green preservation society. I would be like. Let's get all the windows open. Let's hear this. It's not what's happening. They don't do a lot. They don't do a lot of replacements. No yeah they're not catering to the middle aged man on the third floor they're not catering to this guy from cleveland. This grumpy man from cleveland. Dave speaking of cleveland i was i was thrilled to hear that. You return to new york. Because i i always associate you. Think of you as such like a new york guy a new york institution. Oh you. i've always got a slice of pizza and my hand. You're always walking here. I'm yeah i no. I didn't. I spent most of the last year in a tiny town in ohio. About three thousand people not even near where about low less than an hour from where i grew up so a world away couldn't be more more different My girlfriend and i were at her mother's house and We were taking care of her. The come on it wasn't big guys you would have done the same And i i did come back to new york a little bit but yeah amna benham back in new york. I'm yelling it. I'm sending nasty emails to restaurants who are just trying to survive after this hell of ear it. I'm just like hey stop it. It's you're upsetting me. I'm trying to watch my programs. Is there anything you'll miss about that. That tiny town in ohio. Obviously you know there's more peace and quiet but did you like. Did you like become accustomed to anything in the year that you were marching bands. Probably bigger marching bands. Very nice Yeah 'cause we're right on on the majestic lake eerie So i would go You know drink coffee in the morning out there on the lake and you know some cold ones at night. Doug needs to go out you just open. The door is the things i miss. I don't miss things. Like trump boat. Parades that happened twice. Yeah i'll take out. Probably i'd imagine the marching band preferable to the trump boat parade. You obviously before the election. The first one my girlfriend and i went out to marvel at this thing and i'm yelling swears not at the voters but just saying what i thought about trump Not a fan as you might guess And they started saying mean things back to me in threatened to one guy tried to park jetski income. Fight me i'm barefoot. Drinking coffee with my sweet dog and he like wants to so the next one tough. Because i bet you know there's a i would maybe wager that like yearly. You're like you're a sturdy guy and you're in good shape but the like incredible shape yet. Jet ski guy is probably like unpredictable. Like even if you are bigger than him and even if you are in better shape like the jetski guy unhinged yeah he he. Maybe he bites. Maybe he's got a box cutter in his board shorts. You know will. This is why not that. I'm you know. I'm not a fan of violence in any form but i've always said you never fight anyone other than close friends and family right because you don't know what anyone else you don't know what they're gonna do when your ten yeah fight beat up your brother or not that i could do something like that but yeah you don't want to fight a stranger on the street you'll be able to defend against jordan. You know this better than anybody here on this show but you have to know what the defense is against their special moves. Yeah exactly when. They stretch their arm out super far. You gotta know how to do. What do what combo you have to do to dodge exactly. I'm just a fan of when you see them. Park in that jetski had back to the house. Speaking of life acts. We sold the two hundred page. Self-help book also. Do you one better. Pretend you're going to the house across the street. I then the running around and then go to your actual. Let's take a quick break. We'll be back in. Just a second on jessica long. It's jordan jesse go. I'm jesse thorn. America's radio sweetheart jordan morris. Boy detective what what a season. It is beautiful weather here in los angeles california breaking news. It was just. Bobby mcferrin doing a live. Show up the cookbook breaking news. I'm tearing this off the teletype your jordan. It looks like this. We have an important. Psa from our friends at manscaping dot com. Yes this is your pubic service. Announcement hired bruce vallance fair. Osce pretty good pretty solid. He's got a huge collection of novelty. Tease your pubic service announcement. The manscaping engineering team has created the lawnmower. Four point -o trimmer which is now available for purchase in the usa at canada. I just got one of these in the mail. You know what. I did with my with my lawnmower three point. Oh fucking drop kicked it like. I was playing australian rules football now off into the off into the distance. I kicked it all the way into the into the fucking space orbit. Yea i mean if you've heard us on the show talk about landscape before you know that we're both big fans of the to keep a tight down there. Yeah in the lawnmower. Trimmer is a great product. And let me tell you the lawnmower. Four point oh it's their best yet. Yeah i love it. I agree you know jordan when you try and groom your area and you're trying to do it with scissors you're trying to do it with Sheers don't do that. Yeah trying to do it with you're trying to do with poll the poultry shares out of your kitchen cabinet. You know what you're gonna do. You're gonna cut your balls straight off. Don't get those balls off happened to me once. Had to chew a lotta gum. Stick those back on. Yeah so listen. Don't waste gum chopping off your balls. You could be. You could be enjoying that fruit stripe the see. Here's here's here's what's going on with the lawnmower four point. Oh jesse it's optimized it's waterproof love that it's waterproof. Yeah waterproof in the shower so convenient. You don't have to worry about making a mess on the bathroom floor. Just all goes down the drain. It's got a wireless charging system that uses electromagnetic induction which can help battery. Length lasts longer. Wow the science the science in this nut trimmer to be fair. Fruit stripe gum also uses electromagnetic induction. True that that's how that fucking zebra came. It's a horrible accident. It's an abomination and should be killed. Get twenty percent off and free shipping with the code. Jj go at manscaping dot com. That's twenty percents off with free shipping at manscaping dot com. Use the code. Jj go unlock your confidence and always use the right tools for the job with men scraped. We've also got a message here from our friends at magic spoon. Can i tell you something jordan. Please ordered another box of magic spoon to my house. Which i paint for with my own money. I love peanut butter my daughter. Grace loves frosted. My wife loves cocoa and the two younger children. Love the fruity one. Here's what magic spoon is. We've talked about it. we love it. It is a serial that makes breakfast not boring but it doesn't have all the junk in it zero grams of sugar. Thirteen to fourteen grams of protein. Four grams net carbs and only one hundred forty calories in each serving kito friendly gluten free grain free so free low carb and gmo free. This stuff is seriously tasty. No joke jordan. Euless it a lot of things that are not in there. But i know our listeners are wondering this i just want set this clear. There's no mice in there. No mice not a single mouth the guaranteed. I know. you're thinking. How can you make a grain free cereal without putting a few mice in their way. No magic speed. It tastes great low sugar. Kito friendly no mice not even one and hey they've got a new mouse lewis flavor birthday cake. It'll be hurt me. It'll be available in a special five pack for a limited time. Only so you get that while you can or you can build your own. Box with coco frosted fruity peanut butter and cinnamon. They're all great. You cannot go wrong with any of those magic spoon. Flavors tasty tasty tasty. I since i really liked the magic spoon. I've been eating magic spoon. Three or four times a week for breakfast. And i'm very happy with it like i said i paid my own money to buy it for real. That is a true story. I've done it twice. Come in give boxes five in it. So that means. I've bought tan magic spoons with my own money. Now here's what you do if you want to use your own money to buy magic spoon and you go to magic spoon. Dot com slash. Jj go you grab that limited edition birthday cake or accustomed bundle of cereal to try it today and be sure to use the promo code. Jj go at checkout to save five dollars off your order. Magic speed is so confident in their product. Expect by the hundred percent. happiness guarantees. If you don't like it for any reason they'll refund your money. No questions asked. We also have a message up on the jumbotron where we share messages from our listeners. This is from david. David says in the los angeles and orange county areas of southern california. I'm here to be the real estate agent. You can trust to have your best interest at heart. I'm backed by brokers with fifteen years of experience and many happy clients whose reviews you can read on zillow. Please reach out. I'm here to help. That's can we make this man. The official real estate agent of jordan. Jesse go sure. Yes and i think we should say his name. His full name david depaw. I think i'm saying that right. David di ipo in gm. Sorry if i messed up initiation. But yeah urge. Form there on zillow or just send him an email de dip hong d. i p. p. o. n. g. at g mail dot com g mail short google. So there you go. So yes especially. I am comfortable saying that. David depan is the official realtor jayco and now he must put that on a bus bench legal. That's that's simply the law and because he's in southern california. We will be driving by to make sure that he has put up the bus bench. So yeah you gotta also. Because he's in southern california. We will be driving by to make sure that his picture is Terrifyingly gorgeous just. How did this person become a real estate agent. Not a fucking model. A model the got out of the they were model and then they left and went and got some portrait's at sears portrait studio but they still look good. Hey jesse before. Get back to the show. I wanted to bring back a fan favourite segment that we were taking a break from because of the max fund drive but these are some independent bookstores across the world where people are pre ordering the bubble graphic novel. Let's hear him baby okay. We got charm city books in baltimore maryland content hula hunt books in northfield minnesota bhagat content. Books do your books are full of them. Curious iguana books in frederick maryland. I think we've seen that one a couple of times so who would want a different kind of aguado. Nobody no loyalty books. Washington dc scrawl books in reston virginia blue cypress books in new orleans years. A blinded beguiling in toronto. That's are you just reading lists of next year's. Hbo show hope. Maybe it's both. Maybe it's a sexy rollers setting an independent bookstore. Where is that show. where's the ba- guy whereas bookstore the beguiling rondo. I believe yeah. Tax credits chiro. Cheap to shoot there and compete for new york. Bob's bay with z. Ob's e bay in bloomington illinois midtown midtown rooster not feathers and sunnyvale california. Go bananas and cincinnati. We got new town reader and tallahassee florida. Page one books in albuquerque. New mexico how. This is a great one. This is the store. I shop at pretty regularly. Houses secrets there in burbank. Beautiful comic bookstore gorgeous book store in there in burbank. California books magic in brooklyn. Of course it's been fucking killing at this lot of a lot of orders from books. Magic in brooklyn indie reads books in indianapolis indiana the bookworm in minneapolis. Minnesota say the irreverend bookworm in minneapolis minnesota or the irreverend bookworm from public radio international. Pr could be both. Yeah we got raven bookstore in lawrence. Kansas changing hands books in phoenix arizona apotheosis onyx and lounge in think our video producer just pumped her. Oh yeah because she was so excited about the one in phoenix. Honestly trudging hands is probably the one. We've heard the most preorders from yes. They will remind listeners that the one that gets the most. I will get to myself in order to sign some copies so you think madison bumgarner. There's zona diamondbacks is putting his finger on the scale. Maybe yeah let's see where we at where we were reacting poff llosa's comics lounge in saint louis missouri s c. One of the best. Someone say the best. I love if you love to lounge the place to go s. Cg hobby in the end the anna pennsylvania. There's an indian ice. Get you a model rocket as well. Yeah lots of fun hobbies to do to pass the time unlikely story. Plain view massachusetts orca books in olympia washington. Terrace books in brooklyn formerly killer. Whale books name was too negative. Green apple books in san francisco moon moon palace. Books in minne- minneapolis. Minnesota the regulator bookshop. That's tough fucking bookshop. Name in durham. North carolina on paper books in sydney nova scotia. A bear pond books. In montpellier vermont third-place books in lake forest washington griffin bookstore in friday harbor washington the escapist in berkeley holy moly comics and collectibles. In north hampton massachussetts north shire books in sarasota springs new york anyone comics in brooklyn new york porter square books in somerville massachusetts east bay books in seattle washington inst. Can i say that in this innisfree. Books in meredith new hampshire g mark comics in champaign illinois east city books in washington. Dc finney books in seattle washington space cowboys when it's named after my son oscar beta fish. Oh well that's great. That's he started a bookstore to for him. Space cowboy books and joshua beta fish is just put another fishing there because they might fight and kill each other but they you can have them apply for a bank loan to open a small business if you put them together they fight. If you leave them alone. They opened up a bookstore. Space cowboy books and joshua tree california cosmic monkey comics in portland. The avid reader davis california. Big planet comics in college park maryland. Once upon a time bookstore in locker. Santa california our business books in calgary alberta shelf-life books in calgary alberta north shire books in sarasota springs new york. Oh my gosh. what a list. It was fun to listen to for everyone including me. Thanks to everybody who's pre ordering and if you're if 'priority your local bookshop let me know and i'll shut him out on the show the it won't be back in just a second jordan jessica It's jordan jesse go. I'm jesse thorn. America's radio sweetheart jordan morris boy detective. Oh hey. I'm dave dave hill from before dave from before. Love it okay. So last week a recently on the program we we. We requested that people call in with Probably i mean. I saw this trending on twitter. They were talking about it on decent marrow Like it really. This is real. This is a topic that is on the tip of everyone's tongue president biden addressed it Recently in just on the white house lawn Things people have found on farms. Brian can you play the first thing. People have found on farms i. I called him before. Probably sucked it up. So i'm calling in for steph. I found on farms. And i found when i was kid on this farm that i currently work on that i grew up on found a shack of sixty seventies and eighties pornography. That is how i learned about sex. So i guess also. I'm a mentor. I found a bunch of old penthouses on this now. The only thing i've found won't be the last thing i've found probably call again. Yeah 'cause whenever you find something keep us updated you find some nineties pornography. Let us know before the if you find some. You know like old. You know movies that they say are like nudist documentaries like a stag party in the fifties yeah let us know some you know some Figure drawing studies right. I think you know if you're gonna find that sort of material. I think he did hit the jackpot. That's the real sweet spot. Sixty seventy s and eighty s. He think he kind of went downhill. I'm told told yeah. I'm more of a twenties and thirties man. A short bob. A straight frilly dresses my thing my friend carl. He bought a house upstate. This he'd years ago and there was a barn. You know where this is headed. there was a goat. He found he found similar similar materials. But and then just just Disturbing i think the man we presume the man of the house Based on i think he was just going out there and just having a real wild time with his magazines. Let let it fly into the hay. Bale i think he was. Yeah he was and they had been transformed into adobe. Technically technically it was now adobe jesse. You know how. I feel about bloomer. What i'm just talking about construction techniques that provide for ample insulation. Okay from the desert heat. N- okay. But if i hear you talk about coming in hey i would never talk about. I would never talk about sauce pay sausage. Oh boy let's go find out what someone else found on a farm. Hi jordan jesse. And i'm going to guess special guest joe firestone i'm calling for your segment. Things i found on a farm in which Jordan requested a skeleton and jesse requested a piece of a blimp. A few years ago. I went on a field trip to france as part of my recreation and tourism program and at one point my professor got driver to stop by the side of a farmer's field so he could route around for remnants of the first world war. I ended up finding a couple bullets. And it's jordan's lucky day. Because i did find a piece of human skull and i think someone's clavicle. My understanding is this is actually quite common in farmers fields in this area and there's relevant government agencies that come collect the remains and lay them to rest respectfully elsewhere. Unfortunately we didn't find any blimp parts. That i'm aware of but we did meet a guy with a metal detector who said his friend a week before had found a full case of grenades so happy hunting around farms everyone but do be careful because you never know when you might find a full case of grenades. Thank you and all the best. Where would you find that under a rock. Have the rockwood teeter a little. You know sure. I this this okay. So here's here's here's my first reaction to the isn't other than the case of grenades which i agree a raises. Some logistical question. It i. I was getting the vibe here that maybe because this was a field trip the bullets in the skulls were things that you know the educators planted out there for the kids to find when you do the panning for gold. You know exhibit or you know like. Oh here's what it's like to be a paleontologist and they put some little little bonus at there for you to find two things. I want to address your jordan. Yeah sure i. I just wanna mention that We did a little archaeology project. When i was in fifth grade shoutout to discovery center school Where we had to create our own culture and then berry stuff in the art of the school that symbolized our culture. Our culture was the referees culture. Yes that surfer spelled backwards and yes. I did make a clay tube of zinc sunblock But i wrote. I wrote sunblock on it in the special language that we had created. So that's thing number one thing number. Two you mentioned prospecting rich a rich beautiful thing number two jordan. You mentioned prospecting I know that you recently moved to the great city of pasadena. California city of roses. As i'm glad we're finally getting into it on the show i happened to be in pasadena california. I'm not. I'm not bragging about this. But i was at a an occupational therapy appointment for one of my children again. Not bragging but you know addressing some occupational therapy issues and while i was there strength at your kids have occupation i. Yeah it's nice. They're having a har- they're having a hard time with their clowning. If some repetitive clowning issues. I happened to notice in pasadena california. I don't know if you've patronized this business. A prospecting supply store nope it tracks. I mean this is the place that have a prospecting supply store and it's very in line with the general vibe up here lou. My fucking mind prospecting supplies. Yeah i would say that. The general vibe of pasadena's field trips you'll trip location. A series of filter locations mashed mashed together. All i can think of is how that prospecting store did during the pandemic. Did it do better than ever or that did they say look we were brazen before but now big dave. They didn't have to worry about the pandemic on a ppp. Loan a paycheck protection program for prospecting as long as you can. Provide curbside pickup. You know it's crazy. There's a pet portrait gallery in my neighborhood. I'm amazed how they stay. They stay open to begin with. I just walked by the other day. Still in business much less in the west village of new york. It's not a business that requires real estate. They've chosen to have real estate this. That's confidence take a good. Look at the. If if i were if i were in charge of a field trip i would say go. Go look the the pet Portrait painter in the eye and drink it in. And take that with you for the rest of your life. Yeah and you can accomplish anything Feel that jordan you were talking about that Dispensary in pasadena. You're checking out. What was it called. Puff puff pasadena buffalo fascinating. Puff puff pasadena. I'm here talking about this prospecting supply store. I think you know what they have in common dank nuggets shirt thank marijuana toners and forty niners when something momentous happens to you we ask you to call us at two zero six nine eight four four fun. That's two zero six nine eight four four fun. Why don't you. Brian play one. Call of that high jordan jesse and recurring guests the conspicuous absence of finance and he d. fernandez laughter. Oh i miss it. I'm calling in with a memphis occasion I have a six year old son who has a neurological condition which affects his motor skills and his each. And you know he's been in speech therapy for a couple years now and you know it's it's always been a source of pain for him a lot of heartbreak because he can't communicate with the rest of the world and you know it hurts so bad. He hates going school. It's hard for us as his parents to even understand what he says. But he's making tremendous breakthroughs lately. He's working so hard last week. he's finally able to make the the see in the case sound. Which has been something. That's been hard for him for his entire life and Just earlier today. He's surprised me as we were reading his schoolwork together just made the g sound Which was one of the last letter. See now he can. He can do every letter in the alphabet. And i'm just so happy and so he's been working so hard and it's it's just you know all these years been struggling and it's it's fantastic. He how happy he is now. He's able to you know. Make all these Now nowadays is that the rest of us take for granted you know. Yeah just call him. Say that and now a little bonus. My dog snatched tube birds out of the air within minutes of each other yesterday. And i disappointed a russian trucker as i was leaving work today. All right i hope you guys ever nice day right always disappointed trucker on your way out got to teach them a fucking lesson sir. I'm sorry this this had to be three separate couples. You've taken some some some hard turns that would make your jealous al racecar driver. Al unser jr. not the old man. The younger one were really a pallet cleanser moves to because i was getting a little choked up and then he talks about the dog eating the birds and i was like those dogs. You can't stay mad at him and then rushing rocker. I'm like intrigue all. These things are happening do you do you guys think this guy called in. Because he knew. I was going to talk about occupational therapy. He's like off occupational and speech stories to tell my friend. I got a kid and speech therapy to. We're just doing it all around. I mean this is really thrilling that his kid has gone onto c k and g three of the greatest letters. I think we can all agree. Hop their top twenty six. They make up the word gunk you can't spell gunk without. Can i just say what i think. The top letters are gotta be our st l. n. e. Yes that's right. The ones that you get for free when you're playing wheel of fortune and of course. He need to dispel rl stein. Favorite author of both goosebumps and fear street series. You big fear street guy. Oh yeah love the street. F s i actually. I'm not br. I guess i am bragging. I met rl stein. Yeah it was pretty cool. Hang actually had to go. It was pretty cool. German metal festival. So it's pretty cool. It's here in town. The town of manhattan new york city. Yeah did you get spooked at all. Which settled chat. Yeah you know mostly yeah. I'm pretty good. You good yeah pretty good. I'm glad to hear he's well. It's great that he's doing good. Yeah no nice fellow. Nice fellow how does he come up with all this spooks and frights. We have a lot of great ideas on jordan. Jesse go were absolutely full of them a lot of recurring segments that people love because we have so many instead of calling them out specifically we just have people let us know what segment. They're calling in four when they call often. We don't even remember having item. I can't speak for you. Jordan often can't remember having invented them but We must have because people are calling in for him so go ahead and press play on. What brian hi jordan jesse. Sunny d. and feature guests does scott vacuum. Uh brian call god. I'd love to have scott back on this program. You think back you would do go back on jayjay go right. Let's get it trending. Do you think back came on the show. We could get him to take shirt off. I think we tell them that. Like it's important for the show. I mean i think yeah. I mean he does the work you might as well shop the goods you not you we we could have that conversation with his or management before the shell so i'm sure he would need to sign a semi nudity consent form situation. I think you'd be for us though. Of course we'll have an intimacy cochon hands. Yeah you know in case just to show us how to be intimate with back ula f scott backyard. You got julie actor scott back. Dave gorgeous guy. I don't think i'd do you know. But it's probably one of these things. I'll i'll google him for a couple of hours next time. You're hanging out in griffith park. You're going to see him. Jog passed with no shirt on. You're gonna know exactly who's got back Okay you're gonna know zach totally. Okay plus press play by play. This is nylon calling in for your recurring segments sticking it to home depot a few months ago. My fiancee and i went down to north carolina to stay in an airbnb for months to do some hiking and we needed Adirondack chairs the place didn't have any The only department store around was home depot. And we didn't really wanna shop there but we were able to purchase two adirondack chairs. Use them for the entire month And then at the end of the month leverage their Extensive return policy to return the chairs of for free so we were able to basically have to bacterias at home. Depot's expense so thank you very much. Love you guys City willie says he loves you too. Thank you for back. What the fuck this was city. willies owner. How did he closed with the city. Willie this whole fucking illegal scheme that he's describing this yeah this whole home depot thing was a subterfuge that this is the honor of my favorite instagram dog. Do you think he would take one of my dogs for his dog. You take take that back in defensive. This sweet sweet jesse. Let's not let's not go down this road. Don't say he'll say something you can't take back city will god. I love city willy. How instagram buller. Your dogs i think or knows fucking city willie. I'll tell you that much city willy has a friend to. I'm trying to think of what city will. He's friend's name is but this friend is practically as good as city. Willie i what city will willies deal. It's a dog from instagram. That i love love is fucking dog. I met a famous instagram dog. Once i did a show with One of these dogs and gosh. The audience was really excited about that dog. Now really sorry about anyone else. No hard to fall harder to follow the dog. You know you got close with the dog because then people thought you were a band the weirdest thing about it is. The dog's owner wrangler had a real dog very down to earth. The owner was not so much was just like. Yeah real fucking snooty on tickles owner. Get out of the way you pizza. Shit connive semester go please don't look me in the eye. I own a dog. Can i tell you what homedepot scam immediately flashed into my head. When he said he was calling it far segment sticking it to home depot. And first of all. I'm i support anyone sticking it to home depot my father-in-law's the manager of independent employee owned hardware store marine county jackson's hardware go shop at it And so home. Depot's of family enemy and i'm against them for many reasons but The immediate thought that i thought of is there's a home depot in my neighborhood. And you know it. Has those those like floor. Sample sheds out front like full-size assembled sheds that are out front. Yeah my thought. Is you just go there at night. Put that thing on top of your car and drive away. Yeah i mean if it's too big for you to lift what you do. Is you get two cars and you tire rope between them nice. Yeah i think that happens in the new fast and furious trailer. The rock needs a shed. Dammit gang back together. I know we all said we were out. We're gonna keep my rake. Says the rock rock rake. This is your home depot. Scam is to simply steal a large object. That's exactly ocean's eleven great because it looks kind of like a little house. I mean it's a large object but it's a tiny tiny house. Yeah but it makes you look like a giant man. Which i like. Yeah it's nice to nice to feel big. You know my my home depot scammers you go in and you pick out something on you know low on a shelf and you ask for assistance looking for that thing and win the home depot guy bends over to grab it for you. You shank him wa. That's a fucking classic black metal move at don't we hard to get ratchet leave him bleeding on the floor. Then you've finished your shopping. Don't murder two zero six nine eight four four five or email. It's jj co maximum fund dot org. We'll be back in just a second on jordan. Jesse go we have wasted this world now. Magic put a storm in the sky that has rendered the surface of our planet uninhabitable but beneath the surface. Well that's another story entirely. City built leagues below. The apocalypse survivors of the storm forged paths through a strange new world some seek salvation for their homeland above others seek to chart the vast undersea expanse outside the city's walls and other still seek what else fortune and glory dive into the sea. The latest campaign from the adventures o every other thursday on maximum. Find dot org or wherever. You listen to podcasts Twenty twenty one. Pin sale has begun. Thank you so much to everyone. Who participated in the max fun drudge. This is the last year for a while that we'll be doing for max fund drive and the fifth year that will be selling pens and donating all proceeds to charity. The past year proved what we already knew that having access to the internet at home mississippi for work school healthcare and keeping in touch with family and friends so the proceeds from this year's pin sale will go towards everyone on a nonprofit working to bridge the digital divide. We're grateful that with your support will be able to help. Low income folks gain access to affordable computers internet services and digital literacy programs. The sale will run until may twenty eighth folks at the ten dollar monthly level and above. We'll have access to all of the pins from the drive. That's thirty eight pins one from every show on the network we also have a special twenty twenty one. Max fund drive pin that members can purchase go to maximum fund dot org slash pin sale for more info and to learn more about everyone on and support them directly. You can go to everyone on dot. Org it's jordan. jesse go. I'm jesse thorn. America's radio sweetheart jordan morris boy detective. I'm joe firestone no dave. You're not joe firestone. I'm dave hill. Got confused by the earlier call. That said it was joe. Firestone that was with you guys. you're very suggestive day. Very suggests not all gentle voice. New york are joe. Firestone i love joe firestone so i'd be honored to be her even for the few seconds i just was. It'd be wonderful if there was a being john. Malkovich situation for joe firestone. I think we can all agree would take it. We live right by each other. Not to brag. I referred her to her to the vet that she takes her dog too. That's where i take my dog. And i just took my knock to the vet and they took fifty dollars off the bill because i referred joe. Wow that's pretty good. Do they only do that to people who are producers on adult swim shows or have to be sang got it. I think that's a nonunion show so no no. Let me think about all union union. Yeah guild. It's i know i i say this because i was on on the show so i do know. It's a sex show. it's an equity production. You know because they've got more than forty nine seats equity. No i did. I did not to brag. But i did an off broadway play and i did not. You never gets guesses about me. But i did not grow up in the theater and everyone but you project so well i know tip of the tongue teeth and the lips david hill david hill. Exactly everyone in this play was like a broadway they were all real deal broadway actors and then there was the card and they everyone had an asterisk and it says member actors equity except for my name and i didn't and i said we'll want to think to do have the asterisk and then have it say have it just be by not my name and have it say not actors equity. That's how us an asterisk. It's the exception. It is not and they just didn't that was just one of the. Many humiliation. Sigh suffered during the production near. You're a reverse roger marris. They could have done like you know after everybody like asterix member actors equity in then you asterix member which taint exactly. Can i suggest something please next everybody else. Asterisk member actors equity next. Dave asterix obelix. Sure you wanted to. Why not reference. A french extreme. Maybe danish no. I'm going to say dutch. Let's let's go with flemish belgian way. Probably someone will tell us dave hill. What do you got going on. You got the dave hill goodtime. Our you've been livestreaming the day. Feel-good time i'll tell halls during this pan pandemic Yeah we've been doing this. And then but i'll tell you this friday release of may twenty first. I'm in a huge hollywood movie I'm a movie called. that comes out. Friday may twenty first it stars. Charlie tuhan from ozark will forte's in it. This is another situation with those member actors equity. It's the sort of thing. I'm deterred in the punishable but i'm in this movie. They let me talk and wave my arms around. I live really. Let me run with the ball in this movie And it's a really great movie So everyone has to want it in. Select theaters as they say and also on the amazon and all that and then I'm in the new peacock series. Girls five ever. I have a guest starring role on when rose five. I haven't gotten to your episode dave. I'm only a and have not gonna tell you which one. Because i wanted to be a surprise but it is episode seven. Did you get to meet paula. Pell i did. I actually met her once before. But i don't know if she remembered the which is not a judgment on her just the nature of show business. I don't know why said Meet a lot of dave's listen. I've been in show business. You meet a lot of dave's and you're very distinct dave but one of the greenhouse A wealth of dave. There's many dave's there's a. There's another dave hill as we know no west coast dave hill. But honestly you've been on. Jordan jesse go way more times than sorry west coast phil i i'm the preeminent dave hill in the world at the moment but as we know as i could taken out at the niece by you know who knows who knows what dave hill is waiting in the wings. Just trying to. I'm not gonna say what example this could come from. But what if there was suddenly a seattle based soccer star named dave vilm. Then you'd be out of venue. Be out of luck youtube. I at first. You'd see him just goals for the junior national team and you'd be like this sixteen year old is is hot on my heels. He'd become a star on the seattle sounders. And you'd have to give him a a serious. What was it an acl injury. What did you do to that jordan morris jordan. Oh dave yeah. Jesse is referencing. There's a jordan morris. This is the story of the more famous jordan morris Who not to my mind. You're the preeminent jordan more. thank you dave. I appreciate that and honestly that's important too. So thank you for saying that but yes the other one is the one for me jordan name. You know what i get it. I've seen dude great looking guy soccer star beautiful little short a. He's yeah he's got a lot on me honestly You could probably by the shorts. If they don't have a big five you could try. Play it again. The umbro is that the brand. Yeah probably umbro. They might be. I don't know if he has like ashore unless they could be likud. Sportifs do lot of shorts out there. So i'll do some research. I'll make sure. I get the right shorts but yeah i think he i think he's. He was playing in the uk for a while. But yes i think he is maybe out with an injury and even though he is more famous than me and is Easier to google We wish him a speedy recovery. And i don't mean that in the shooting way i hope he gets better soon. All the best to do to soccer jordan morris And of course is beautiful. Fiancee beautiful and of course. All the best to laycock sportifs. May you continue to live on european tourists backpacks long into the future. And i'll just be here in america walking around on my fucking perfect. Acl's just fucking healthy shiny. A see elle's went to the doctor to get a checkup. The doctor asked if he could borrow your acl. So fucking gorgeous yeah. He wanted to show medical students. What a what a fucking gorgeous. Acl looked like shut up. And keep checking the prostate doc. Milk baby jesus. I am offended jesse. I told you this is an offensive. Show what did i say at the beginning of the show. Milk the common in. Jesus christ where am i. A frat house g. it warms during the day And then keeps warm in the evening but then by the time it's day again. It's it's cool. Because of the thick walls that are that are made from a combination of hay and semen. You know you have to sauce the hey. I told all my little nieces and nephews. I said i'm doing a really popular. Podcast uncle dave and they let us know as soon as it's out we wanna hear. It mean the schedule. For joe rogan gonna go on his job and he keeps it keep probably keeps it clean. Cleaner probably keeps it clean on that. Show that guys on the dark web. You know that guys on the dark web as not doing on the dark web yes like direct to his apple. Watch probably just dark web in it. Got dave i was on the daviel goodtime hour not too long ago and i had a blast. I think if people haven't listened to it yet they really should. It was so much fun. I had more fun. Thank you yes it was great to have you and And i love bubble. Thanks man i'm referring to the graphic. I'm ki tae. I promise and the show is well but you were on the show. I'm just glad at this part. Where i'm i'm being royce notice. You should leave in the part where we talk about. How great jordan news. We should not cut extend it brian. Maybe dropping island old mentions how great i am exam. I love your swimmers hair. Oh thanks yeah. it's still here. i've been meaning to get it cut but it's Sticking around i love it love it. I still support it. I'm still totally behind it. I know that every time. I say it it sounds like i'm being insincere but i really liked it nice of you to say i do think i look insane and we'll be having to enter into professional situations again soon. Fair i i probably should not look like a alcoholic wizard near you. Should you kind of look like the white. what's that guy called chengdu and the futurist for yahoo. I wanted to say chinky. But that's the guy who's friends with nelly. Yeah that's the verb guy. I think i remember what chingiz big hit was. But i think it's the right there song anyway our producer on the program. Brian sunny d. fernandez Dave hill has been our guest on the show. Valerie moffitt livestreaming the show on the internet. Still in beta folks still in beta our theme music is love you by the free design. Courtesy of the free design light in the attic records. You can find us on social media at jordan underscore morris at jesse thorn on twitter. At jordan david morris and at put dot this dot on on insta turns out instant. Mashed potatoes are pretty good. Especially if you doctor them up afterwards. I had never had them before but i like them. In there really convenient side you can find us on reddit. Maximum fund dot read it dot com. Which is a fun. Hang not unlike the dave hill. Good time our to which you should subscribe to zero six nine eight four four five or jj go at maximum fund dot org for your voice memos and this is our first episode after the max fund drive our heartfelt and sincere thanks to every single member of maximum fund. We are odd that we get the opportunity to work for you. Have you in case. You love you A maximum fund dot org comedy and culture artists owned audience supported.

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Indigo Children: Superpowered or Superfake? | 141

Hysteria 51

49:07 min | 2 years ago

Indigo Children: Superpowered or Superfake? | 141

"I'm Dani Shapiro, my new podcast family secrets, just wrapped up its first season and it's filled with stories about the secrets that are kept from us secrets to keep from others and the secrets, we keep from ourselves if you've been waiting for the right time to binge them all now's your chance. Check out the episodes, along with bonus interviews and stories and keep an ear out for the next season in August. You can find out more at family secrets podcast dot com, and you can listen and subscribe at apple podcasts, or on the iheartradio app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Disturbed. Credible historical panic. I think we're getting new a weird area. Hysteria. You can't handle the truth. Right. As god. This is stereo fifty one. The truth is out there. But you won't find it here coming for you. Look that has one of them now. Welcome in hysteria nation to the podcast. It's never been diagnosed is indigo children four fans of the indigo girls. This is a stereo fifty one. He said, no. We are on our staffing. Broadcasting from the lower fourth dimension, otherwise known as Chicago. We are your hosts and indigo extraordinary. I'm John goat worth, and this, this is Brent hand. I can't believe he played the girls. I literally and I, I don't think I'm stressing this enough. I hate the indigo girls. You're just giving him ammunition. I mean. Nope, stop. All right enough with that. And Brent since we're talking about some out there stuff tonight, we thought we'd bring in their most out there guy, we know or at least the most neurotic, welcome to the show back again, Mr. Kevin Crispin. You don't have been trying to tell you something about my life to give you inside between black and white the best thing you ever did for me. Already know after all, you know what we let you come back, and you do this. Yeah. Pretty soon. You're not gonna be welcome back. Well, I'm trying to get to Joe pack level. Fair enough. Fair enough. He's still out front. So you can go with what I stepped on him. When I when I said, give me water you idiots forgot about me for forgot is a strong word that other voice, you're hearing, like a speaking spell that needs a twelve step program is the one. The only conspiracy bought needs is also a strong word conspiracy about his robot created my lab to help make our lives easier. Instead, he constantly insulted. Annoys me drinks too much, and maxes out. Well, I say mine, but I put him on my wife's name. So my wife's credit cards. So he's kind of like your own personal teenager careful what you wish for exactly exactly now gentlemen, gentlemen tonight. We're talking indigo chill. I know. And as you guys know I'm a huge green lantern fan. So the indigo tribe, which is one of the factions in the rainbow of lanterns. I couldn't believe we you finally picked a topic. I was intere-. So we cut his Michael. Yeah. I just had a stroke. Well, I saw you lose some time to stay in black Knight, no evil literally, we will cut eyesight L Mike, those. He wears a ring wear my power greed. Lanterns lights. He's creepy. He's creepy. All right. So indigo children are not lanterns. They are kids that either a could have superpowers or be just needs some Ritalin, regardless of that. I think it begs the most important question we will ask tonight. What superpower would you give your ten year old self? Well, if I was lying, I would be sight beyond sight. But I don't want that. I want a real one indestructible like invulnerability, and with that would have to be super strength, because, you know, that's too, okay? It's all okay. All the powers of, of Greenland, and that I have all that see I just said it. Okay. Okay. I mean, the ring winning the spirit of the discussion, picking my superpower us playing a ten year old though. That's that. Yes. Win win. Is his Mike getting cut off are working? I really am. Sorry doesn't really know how to produce I made sure he, he can't get too much. You can't get just sits there. Ray the least you can do is take down his gain. Okay. So, so prince bullshit answer. Kevin, what would you give your power? Would you give your ten year olds off the power to be happy? This is going swimmingly. I'm just going to say the ability to fly and move on, because this is a terrible idea, man. Did you see what was that movie where those guys Howard to fly and telekinesis? And they realize when you go up in the air, it's freezing. So every time, it's the summertime but they're like parkas and stuff like realism. Yeah. Because I was just on a flight back from the UK and I looked over at that thing, and it said outdoor temperature negative sixty seven degrees, fair. That's hilarious. We were just on the last one, and it was literally negative sixty seven degrees. Now that makes me wonder if that's just what they put on there. It's a conspiracy. We do a show about that. We can it's a balmy eighty four. John, I want to bring this home because I think I can tied in. I was looking at your son. The other day when we were all hanging out in his oral was this lovely shade of indigo. Did you ever think of your child is special? I, I do in the sense that he's a special guy. I like him a lot. You're in luck because there's a test that we can do to find out if that indigo can actually lead to him being an indigo child. Can we get back to you seen Auras? Is he a little bit unusual? You know. Yes. Does your child possess supernatural traits? Most certainly Cape. Yeah. How about super abilities? Absolutely. If you answered yes, and you did all those, you have yourself an honest, to goodness indigo child. Make sure to exploit him to the fullest of your potential. Hell, yes, I'm actually on board with that. Let's see about those are what they say the traits, you need to be an indigo CHAI. How do you how do you perceive? Someone's aura when we were in college someone had an aura photograph. Facing camera. I remember and mine was like yellow or orange. Orange is probably aren't black. You're for confusing yellow with black again. That was that you colorblind. Are you or a blind horrible? Really colorblind yellow that's true. That's quite a jump. Yeah. So are g biv? Let's break it down a little further though. There are other traits that they have to have for someone to be considered a true. Indigo child. They are empathetic curious in strong willed what child isn't though. I mean, that's you know, hey, okay. Whatever they're often perceived by friends and family is being strange. Also called chill peck syndrome. Yeah. Yeah. I've heard about that. They possess a clear sense of self definition and purpose. Now that's a little bit more or less. You know, a lot of child and children. Don't have, you know, clear self definition purpose. But whatever. That's, but that's also one of those things to really hard to define exactly. Well, this was, this was starting to make me think of have you guys ever had your palm read? Oh oh, yeah. You have your palm read and look at it. They go. Oh, you've been in a relationship, you know what you want in life. Yeah. You had some trouble growing up if I was upon reader, just one out of every ten or so, I'd be like get out cow. How fun out? You. Would you ever give them the stink palm? Well that's the other that's the other night. No, they call that a cold read. It's using traits and factors that everybody would want to see to, to elicit a positive response. I suppose you're implying here. That, that's what they're doing with indigo children. Well, that's right. But on, how would you give them an indigo aura, excuse me? I told you I'm like Brent? I'm aura, aura blind. Yeah. So, so you, you don't address that. No. Go ahead and just act like there's other things though, these children show a strong innate subconscious spirituality from early childhood, which, however, does not necessarily imply direct interest in spiritual or religious areas, whatever that means how fucking ambiguous is that shows consciousness spirituality. I'm not religious. I'm just spiritual subconsciously. That's, that's your child. They also have a strong feeling of entitlement or deserving to be there. Hear what sounds like a child every kid. Yeah. Yeah. High intelligence quotient, I was checking them all off until I got to that. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Inherent intuitive ability. Well, you know, palm reading like we're talking about that one's a little bit more than some of the others because that makes it sound like you know that weirdo like brand stark just that dead. I stare it's like the whole. I'm intuitive. I, I know what you're thinking. Right now. You're thinking that I don't know what you're thinking. That's. Not dude. Oh, also resistance, too rigid control or thority, who so like your teenager. See by everyone in doesn't this all describe Calvin from Calvin or knob, right? Yeah. Right. These children may function poorly in conventional schools, due to their rejection of rigid authority. They're being smarter or more spiritually mature than their teachers and their lack of response to guilt, fear or manipulation based discipline. So before we move on. Let's. These are usually how they describe we've, we've hit the we've given a negative tone to each and everyone on the positive side, if indigo children really exist, and they're exhibiting these powers. These are people that can see through you. These are people that can read everything around them. They know they look at you and know what's going on your mind, what's going on your heart, and what problems you're going through, and maybe even how to help they can see your aura. They know when you're Auras bright. They know when it stem, they're the most empathy people in the world. Two or almost gets to the ability to read minds. They are essentially, if you were a Star Trek, the next generation fan, they are essentially betas Lloyd's, you know, Deanna troi. Commander Deanna troi I guess she actually did move up in a hot piece a trek that was. That's what indigo kids are essential. Yeah. Into kind of on top of that. John, I think the most important thing is, it's is empathy. Right. And if these kids are if they're if they're not even anything else, and they're just empathetic, and they're able to be there with people and help them out. I think that's an amazing thing. But the problem is, and we're going to get into this. You're probably thinking, wait a minute. This sound so hokey. Well, there's a lot to this that we're going to unpack. You would be right to, to poke some holes in this, according to research psychologist, Russell Barkley that whole new age movement has yet to produce impure coal evidence of the existence of indigo children as the traits. Most commonly attributed them are closely aligned with something called the four year affect it. So vague that they could describe nearly anyone or anything like Kevin like you mentioned earlier with cold. Right. Many critics and people, you know, that, that speak out against the c the concept of indigo children as made up just extremely general traits. A sham diagnosis. That's an actually an alternative to medical diagnosis with a complete lack of science or studies it, this was like a precursor to the antibac-, sir. It was the anti helping out anti getting chill. Not help not in a way not to the extent that anti vaccine is because if you don't do it, they could literally die within months of years people. Other key? Right. Right. But also, but it is somewhat. It can be viewed a science to nine right right now they would argue that the that the traits that you're pointing to are not indicative of negative things, but they're indicative of being indigo child, but many, and we'll get into this. Many of those traits are also indicative of. ADHD ADD. Let's actually it's very new age out there. The whole thing, let's head to break when we come back. We'll talk where it comes from could it be true? And actually, you know, who's claiming that they are one or is one that's coming up on hysteria fifty one. I mean, it's they are real. I one although on betas. You're a Kiwi co. We design and deliver hands on projects for kids. The next generation of innovators is, started Kiko, because I wanted my kids to see themselves as creative problem, solvers, and makers, and as a parent, a no can be tough to come up with ways to foster creativity and learning and encourage new discoveries Kiko delivers super cool hands on projects for kids every month projects, like science, experiments engineering, challenges and art and design techniques that make learning seriously fun and engaging each one is designed by experts and tested by kids. We offer seven different lines for kids ranging from baby through teen. So there's a perfect one for every kid in your life with Kiwi. Co your child is empowered to not just make a project, but to make a difference. To learn more, go to Kiwi co dot com slash iheart. And you can receive your first great for free. Again, that's Kiwi. Co dot com slash iheart. And G is the way to be. Oh, oh, I see, like during break, generally is right during break, Kevin was asking about my Star Trek affinities. And I said, well, by far I'm first and foremost into the next generation also really like the original series starts to go. Downhill from there hated Voyager DC nine it was just okay. A it's a space station. Right. It is deep space, number nine. Yeah. It's clever. Name. Brent? You you're saying how a lot of folks claimed he space nine is like the definitive. Lean tried watching it in the very beginning, when it came out, and I quit watching, I didn't enjoy, maybe I, maybe I missed out. I don't know. I didn't give it a fair shake. But that's who people erupted. Frank is ears. I mean. Have I ever dance the devil NFL moonlight? Don't rub another man's Ruben ever. All right. Another Star Trek, the next generation not that you can ever have enough, but let's get back to Indio. Let's get back. Tonight. We meet me. People trying to cross one road. That's in the. Yeah. Right. A few cows and lots of stray dogs. True. That's right. You, you spent some time there, you got sick there. Didn't you actually? I honestly didn't. Because I'll eight was garlic cheesy bread from the pizza. Hut. Garlic bread is the, the manna from God, it is, when, when you don't like Indian food. I love Indian food food true. All right. Now I was there for three months. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Did you feel more cultured? When you came back, I felt much more. I didn't take a lot of stuff for granted as I did before I went I felt much more like shots. I got the shots and I was on malaria pills. You ever want to have? No, not those. I just realized how good we have it here when I was over there for three months, and they are some of the nicest, did you go, the, the cosmic barber and get the cosmic head massage where he channels, the literally look this up, if you don't talk about channels the powers of the universe through you and aligned your shock, and we stop the show exciting to look this up to. So indigo child idea. The idea is based on concept developed in the seventies by Nancy and tap is a tapper tape. Do you know I think I'm gonna go? I'm going tap. We're gonna call tap. Tap that Nancy in eighty two. Little weren't you in that band in college up that Nancy. The tar player. Yeah. Yep. I was the first person to hook up affects pedals to keytar at a retirement home. So is that is that like on Wikipedia? I mean we need to we need to write that down. I'm on. Ted down by that domain. So ninety two Nancy published a pamphlet which she expanded, and republished in paperback form as a book in eighty six as understanding your life through color. And it was watching you sure was it spelled S, excuse me, t h argue for through that is true that was in the title. That is a I I wrote down the title. So in forget it and I took it directly from her h argue, okay, colored is a pamphlet. Now, if you can't if you're not fall along that live through color is all about, or, and the colors and what they actually mean. Okay. So here's an interesting, interesting. I just looked this up. You can buy the used version from the eighties, and it says understanding your life through color. T H argue you can buy the updated version, just like the basic on Amazon understanding your life through color. T H, R, O UGA, like somebody did a little editing. Yeah. I like I like it if she would have stuck to her guns. So I'm going to give Brent a ton of credit here. For going OG, the original of this research, that's research. Unlike most the time, I did not buy this book. I buy a lot by. This is not on my sheets. You buy the pamphlet. No. Okay. I didn't I like when you get one of your by a lot of these books, it'll have mass paperback version is just the cheaper version that will work, you know, she Lal. I'm the asshole that, like, oh, there's one copy of the hardback and it's fifty three dollars. Well, I mean yeah, but you have an amazing. It's hard to get off track. You've a beautiful book collection. Thank you. I'm one of those weird people I don't like kindles. I don't like reading. I'm a book dude. I wish it was kind of like a comic book where you could buy the book, and then it gives you like the electric copy with it. The that'd be alright. If I wanted to because sometimes you want to not take the book with you and keep going, you know, be better than that. By the by the regular version and get the audio book with I could be down with that in this book, though, she introduced the concept of life colors defined inner book as the single color of the aura that remains constant most people from the cradle to the grave mine is strikingly beautiful out that. No, I don't think. So he alive. I have stolen tons of Auras. That when you buy get away from you, dude. He does touch. He does more importantly, cradle to the grave, great DMZ. Fight. Minjah. In my head. I mean what do you think the Amax? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Steven Seagal movie cradles. Point till take random words, put them together as they named all of this. Mansi did have a student Barbara Bowers. And she published, what color is your aura question, Mark. And that's kind of when this whole concept caught on Nancy actually stated that during the late sixties and early. Seventies, she had began noticing that many children were being bored, with indigo or as or in her terminology with indigo as they are, quote unquote, life color. How do you get exposure to newborns so frequently that you start to notice patterns? Maybe a midwife I mean that's positive amid why would if she was then I'm on board unless you heard job was like accountant. That's a problem. I'll give you ten percent off. If you bring your baby, I can stare at it just want to know, or three hour, yet to foreign deal to. Yeah, here's the two fair. I wonder if twins had the same or though I actually know that no, they don't have to have this anymore. No. I, I, I know that's completely not true because Kirby Puckett's or a was completely different than his brother Sebastian Puckett, now, another member of the twins. Thank you. I mean there were great in the nineties. So yes, or over there was just wherever the twins are at the day purple. So we know that was the other Minnesota native prince prince his aura was definitively purple rain, his Oriole time. Oh. Oh my God. Let's get back so after she had put these things out there leak heroin, Jan Tober ran with these ideas, even further husband and wife, self help lectures. They wrote in nineteen Ninety-two book, the indigo children. The new kids have arrived. Oh. Oh. Was that? Oh, name of like their third album. Children step by step. Oh, ooh. So this concept it gained a lot of popular interest with these publications books, and they're actually films start trickling in the late nineties, and in two thousand and two the first international conference on indigo children was held in Hawaii. Now you're thinking, what six hundred damn people showed up a Wii too easy to get to Hawaii. I gotta be honest. I'd go if somebody's it's on what was the conference on actually, I don't care wins, the flight leaf you won't go with me to the crystal skull conference. It's only like twenty minutes from here, but that's in the middle of nowhere low annoy wire amid I want to go to Hawaii, crystal skull conference. It's two hundred dollars just to go, but it's in a pure amid it's just north of the city, a and you get lunch. I mean, I remember the lion. Better, get chips, raised driving us. Yeah. That's the way it's going to work. Several homes Avin produced on this, including two thousand three feature film indigo and in two thousand six documentary, the evolution, did you know that there's also a, a small but Vero let's say. Off. Music category of hip hop. That's all about an four. Indigo kids. Really? There are rappers, who I forget the name of the band will look it up. Hold on a second. Here we go. I just found an article about it from the website rap fest is the hip hop ecosystem big enough for new micro genera of indigo rappers. The vice did a story on a two did they, here's some, some of the bands are, well, if they're the same bands that Kevin listened to its twisted fister and the bunghole. And what else can't remember? Well, the butthole surfers to oh. The butthole surfers. She would share and share and outlook on the topic of disease here. There's, there's an indigo rapper named Rory. There's another indigo rapper named Jaden Smith who I rapped alongside Justin Bieber in never say, never is new that off the top of my head. Is that is that the Jaden Smith? Yes. No. Is it? Yes, it is. I'm sure he thinks he's an indigo show. Oh, god. Okay. But we'll Smith thinks he's gonna go tell too. I don't know. Well, maybe he's a Scientology. Yeah. Really learn know kinds of things in this episode. So John, yes. What do they think they are these indigo children? Well, they it ranges. Some believe they're just the next stage in human evolution never will happen. But actually interesting fact, the only ones who think that are the ones that kills buying their ears. That's true. In some cases. They believe they possess paranormal abilities. So they're just more paranormal in nature rather than the next a few minutes, Lucien, telepathy and stuff. Pithy all the way to the belief that they are just more empathetic in creative than their peers. So from one end of the spectrum to the other, I think the people that get highlighted on some of the stories you'll read and videos your watch, or more on the end of the spectrum that believe that they are some sort of evolution or they're just a different animal than the rest of us. Here's the thing we've done a lot of out just this Woohoo, talking about it and stuff. Let's go to break. We come back. Let's talk about the bad side of this. And what what the repercussions rule? Let's get back to that in, in proof. If it exists for children. Wow, every time you use this towel hysteria. Hysteria. One. In the Montgomery County, Maryland courthouse. There are thousands of pages of documents detailing the horrific murders of three innocent people to things from the early days of the investigation are clear. No one knew for sure who committed the murders. But some had a theory about who engineered them soon as I heard the details I knew my dad was involved right away. We know it was Lawrence horn. I mean, I knew who else instantly. I says Lawrence everybody knew that Lawrence horn was responsible. Nobody even better. But at the time of the murders, Lawrence horn was clear across the country watching TV in his Los Angeles home, and he could prove it beyond a reasonable doubt. I'm jasmine Morris from iheartradio and hit home media. This is hitman. Listen and subscribe at apple podcasts on the iheartradio app or wherever you listen to podcast. Tests. Oh, god. Sorry about that. All right. So the most important question that could come out of this episode so far if forced to choose indigo girls or new kids on the block indigo girls do love, this is just. Well, actually, like I actually liked the girls. Do you know they do cover of, of a clash song clampdown? Yeah. I didn't new kids on the block though. Staying power with now forty year old women that are my sister loves no kids. Saw my wife saw him. Well, she saw in concert, when they were original writing big and, and I think actually went back to some sort of thing with them in the backstreet boys, now n que OT b be are you are you making that? Oh, no. No. So my parents came back from from Saint Louis from eight with a like they're doing a eighties tour thing. Your parents still do the in? K O T B to around the world. Yeah. What is your mother? Volver. How many how many scrunchy is does your mom own? She's also, a lot of them over the he's some she keeps them all together with their slap bracelet collection just on on the bathroom door. Yeah. Ever taken. Notice slap bracelet. It's just part of a don't give it away. Oh measuring tape. That's really all day with the ones I took apart. I mean, I strong. Homophobe glow in the dark now over will I watched vacuum mentoring on the guy. I don't remember if it was short form documentary or regular one, but on the guy that invented slap bracelets went for a wild ride in losing a bunch of money. Oh, well. At the pet rock. Maybe I'm not remembering the story. But go watch it. Okay. My I have a USB pet rock. It's for the few cats. What that is. It does. Absolutely nothing. Just like a real pet rock, but as USB plug in, and look, it's Bugden going back to the scissor sisters. I while I enjoy them, there's like a newer version of that band, not that there's anybody in the bands that are related. But, like I think of in the same ilk that I love a lot more of the struts. You're listening to the no. I haven't often come out of really good. Speaking of structure, shocking. Just I have to throw this out there. Scissor sisters. Do have a song Paul Paul McCartney. Thank you. All right. Let's get back to this. The proof is in the pudding or the important stuff, more crap. Just ask them. They'll tell you all these people seriously. No scientific studies have gave credibility to the existence of indigo children or their traits. And in fact, there is a sad and scary side of it really is. We're not we're not joking. Now. Some parents choose to label their children who have been diagnosed with learning disabilities as indigo children. In other words, to give them an alternative diagnosis and critics view this as a way for parents, avoid considering pediatric treatment, or psychiatric diagnosis for their, their children. And that's a scary and very sad thing. And this is important time in their lives when it can help. They're still young and yet parents are making these weird excuses like not getting vaccinated and saying, oh, you don't have ADD ADHD autism in that you're. Especially in Inigo child, and you're better than that is just such a such a strange form of denial. It's yes. Really, it's really a, a tough like anti vaccines are really easy to call out. It's like you get the shot or you don't. And if you don't you're bad, like in my mind grade, I do you should get vaccinations. There are so many. There are varying levels of, of ADD, ADHD autism, and those varying levels can be marked by the need for intervention a medication or not the need for robot. Occurs by bed. Sorry. No. Just trying to make a point about the poor kids that are future. No, it's fine. Thanks. I believe the children are future. The chill the way don't give them false. Hope by calling them into go children. Give them what they need seriously though, this is a very important thing. Not making light of this, some Lissa traits use to describe bingo, children have been criticized as we did being vegan up to be applied to most people, a form of the Barnum or the former affected. It's literally that it's psychological phenomenon individuals. Give high accuracy ratings to descriptions of their personality that supposedly are tailored, specifically to them when in actuality, it's just vague general things. It's this wide range of people that are doing this did someone say horoscopes. Exactly. That's exactly what it is. It's, it's you're taking these, well, you'll feel that you have this, or that or the other, and in it can be applied to anyone, but they see it as it only specifically me me me me. And this is my child. Sarah, w Weeden. Suggests in two thousand nine article in Nova religio. Oh, that's my favorite fancying that the social construction of indigo children is a response to a quote apparent crisis of American childhood in, quote in the form of increased youth violence and diagnoses of attention deficit disorder and ADHD. We didn't believes that parents label their kids into go to provide an alternative explanation for their child's improper behavior. That's what we were saying before. That's sad. Do you, do you were kind of to this and Kevin? Do you think parents do that? Do you see them doing apparently, they'd seems that they do? And my question is like, so does that mean anything the child does wrong? Whatever may be. They're like, oh, he's an he's an indigo child. So he's in lightened. So we shouldn't be even worried about what he does on. How do you get him to mow the lawn on the flip side on the flip Nancy argue, though, that if a kid isn't doesn't have ADD or ADHD to the extent, where it's interfering with their life, that, even if let's just say, let's just a thought experiment here? Indigo children, don't exist and ADD ADHD are real and do just a thought experiment. If they aren't on the extreme end of that is there any harm in just telling them their special rather than fucked up well in school? Yes, I don't. I said, not on the extreme end of that. I don't think there isn't, you know what I'm doing if, if the kids. I'm special and you go child. I'm Disney kids that are going to have something to say about that. That's true. But then you have the, the opposite, the flip side of that which was a big thing in the early two thousands, and I it may still be parents saying that their kids have ADD ADHD when they don't so that they can get them on these pills to shut him out. Yeah. Funny. It's this whole, huge juxtaposition, the, you have both sides of this going on in the world at the same time, it's just parents trying to make sense at a children's behavior from many different angles. It's scary on both sides of that. I definitely would without being a doctor think that is probably generally positive on behavioral things unless it's just Uber necessary to kind skew toured the side of less medication rather than more medication. That's just always felt right in my own life. I like jumping a medication. Whether it be antibiotics. The moment someone has a cough. I mean that's why we got us into this problem that we're in right to. To, to behavioral now don't get me wrong. I'm not like a anti medication person. I think they're very necessary, but using them in moderation just like anything else in life is probably a good thing. But I think that the problem, along with that whole thing is just as at fault is these doctors who started pushing these medications for kickbacks and things like that. And they have caused a lot of this to or exacerbated at least the opioid epidemic and things like that. So what you're saying is that big pharmaceutical, is keeping indigo children down. No, because the parents aren't giving it to him there, you know. So they're trying trying to is there direct villain. Fighter opposite there. I remember that calm children are born and created to fight big pharma, I wash movie in the coming wars. Yeah. I just want to interject Ray. Where are we on cutting Brent's Mike off? He's got like a steal thing and cut through. Die hard. They're seven seven thinks the FBI. Here's where it kind of jumps the shark real bad here, though, for me. At least there are even religious connotations with us. So remember Nancy and by stop by right originally. She noted that one type of indigo child. She called them the inter dimensional child, despite being seen as a bully was expected to lead new religious movements aging Waco paging Heaven's Gate. Oh shit. You know, new religious movements what we call colts. Okay. Yeah. And then enter the pagans pagan, author Lorna Tanner noted that every pagan woman, she knew who had or was going to have a child believed their child wasn't indigo child. How about that? Every one of them now, is that because the pagan beliefs have put onto their child, and they're real indigo children. Or maybe they're just being hopeful. Then you have S Zora commodity. This is a quote, despite their problems with. Authority, uncontrollable, tempers and overbearing egos. Indigo children are many pagan parents ideal offspring sensitive psychic and strong willed. But also notes, the concept is less about the child's psychic abilities than the parents, own hopes, and desires for distinction from the less evolved masses that does make sense. I mean it's. I think it is kind of like with the with the movement anti vaccines. I won't what quote unquote best for my kids and kind of saying, well, if I if I teach them young or, or just hope that they are, and just happens that they are much better off in the future, and they could use it as a well I they were born that way that too. But I think when you get into these whole off shoot religions and pagans, they're just going, my kid is because it's better than you, because I'm I'm more enlightened than you. I don't know John. What about Daniel Klein Daniel Klein in an essay, titled the new kids sorry? Oh, sorry. Go ahead. He asked me to read this part just to set me up for each set it up. I just ran with it both of Microsoft at this point in an essay, titled, the new kids indigo children, and new age discourse notes that the magical belief that the innocence of children equates to spiritual powers has existed for centuries. And that the child movement is rooted in a religious rejection of science based medicine in particular. He claims that Nancy and tap derived sovereign ideas from Charles Webster. Ledbetter her main thought process, being that, that emphasizes the connection between children and the color. Indigo and the new age adoption of the concept is a reaction against diagnosis of ADD ADHD and autism. The in other words in essence in short. It's the same thing that we've already been saying people are using the indigo child label instead of more medical labels. Which, by the way, did you know what Charles Webster? Ledbetter zora's. It's got to be yellow Ledbetter. You mentioned die hard earlier. Uh-huh. Did you realize that the limo driver? Believe his real name is Debra white was also the kid in the blues brother's really. No. Actor. That's funny, though. What you're talking about though. Like the diehard connection to brothers. Yes. To greater just making the same points we are. And he also discusses Klein, how the Caroline Tober the couple, we talked about they've actually over the years tried to distance themselves from a religious beliefs about any children in order to maintain control of the concept, even recanting their previous affirmations about Auras, and how skeptics and new agers like both make rhetorical appeals to science. They are actually despite the latter's rejection of it. They're used science to legitimize their ideological beliefs regarding the existence of Inigo Jones. So they're doing anything they can to try to hold onto these thoughts, including when it gets way out there. Then they go. Oh, no. That's not the into children. All ours are real, not this who religious stuff. So let's let's, let's take, let's take a step back for a second. Okay. Let's take a step back from the religious. Connotations. Let's take a step back from this is this is in lieu of diagnosing somebody with a serious, education or or personality disorder unless just go straight to, to what they're saying on the surface and to go children are real. They have purple Auras and they are extremely empathic all the way up to having super abilities. Do they exist go around the table on just on the surf on the surface? Absolutely not. No, no. They don't assistant Ray. You're know what I think they could and poli do. Yeah. All right. That sounds like the hook est cut his Mike off because wouldn't have that power does. To do it. Well, we'll, we'll wait speaking of aren't you going to ask me conspiracy by do indigo children, exist, not for long time pretty good? His Mike off to there's so many cut off guys. I feel lucky I'm I'm the one. No one's trying to cut off. I'm I'm going with Kevin and Brent. I'm going to say a big no one. Yeah, a little Furby. I hate to be the, the naysayer here this board. But this is just people making up excuses for in our. ADD ADHD, things like that are controllable autism is something you can lead a completely well-balanced life. They call it a spectrum for a reason, people are. All right. You know what there's nothing wrong with getting help for your children? You don't have to make up excuses so that you don't get diagnosis and help. And I really think that, that's what this is a lot of these new age people are also the people that they don't believe in medicines. And they use twigs and berries to rub. It announced and stuff like that. It's stills stop it. Crystals that true that, that, that yes but win. It's harming children in a roundabout way. I, I really have a problem with it. And that's why have a problem with people go. Well who cares about you'll flatter Thor's? Well, those flatter others have children and they're teaching them these things or who cares about the anti vaccine while other people. Get hurt in their hurting the children. Now, you find out about children that are suing their parents in some states for the right to get vaccinated because they're under eighteen it's. Held a weird time or lead is insane. I'm not as I'm not as black and white on this one as you are. I am on. They don't exist. Right. I think that there is a continuing to use the word spectrum spectrum of people out there, and I think there are people on one side of that spectrum that absolutely need medication. And help for their ADD ADHD. Whatever whatever challenges agree with that a hundred palm vice versa. And I think that there are folks that are on the other side of that spectrum that might just be called weird might just be called different. You know, maybe not something that needs to be Medicated, but they're just not they're just not what we define weird without having without having those things. And if somebody's in on that side of the coin I wanted, and they and their, their parents, tell them that they're in indigo child or that's just what this, what they believe if that I mean, they're going to be weird anyway. Like, and I'm not saying they're weird because they have ADD ADHD understand the let's just say that there. Weird for being weird sake. They're going to be weird anyway. And if that somehow helps them cope that somehow helps them feel better about themselves, and turn a negative into a positive a weakness into strength. I don't I don't have a huge problem with it. It's not my not, nobody asked me anyway. But I just think that I think that there are like so many things in life. There are traps out there, you know, meaning if all too far down that one side of things, and all of a sudden, you're not getting the help for the so you have to I would work with professionals to figure out how how severe something is. But I just I don't I don't see it as one hundred percent negative. No matter what I think, where I draw the line is I don't mind when you label yourself something. Don't label others, that don't have the ability to say. No. And that's kind of my take away. Kevin. Do you have anything else? No, I think that's all true. And I think going back to, like, yeah. Some kids are just weird. And I think we should celebrate that in and not about it as kids. That's why we got along. I wasn't no. No more normal you present tense. I'll present. Oh, I never did well in grammar, pass or life. You'll leave it dangling. So that's our thoughts, guys. What color is your aura? I want everyone. If you've ever had anyone tell you what your or is your color. That's your homework. What are they going to do that homework, John, they're going to let us know in hysteria nation? That's our Facebook discussion group hav- on Facebook and search hysteria, natio-, would you find it? They'll be the thread for this. Not only do I want you to tell us I wanna see a gif of the color of your. I want to know or what color or I have if anyone had has a way to solve that I'd appreciate it mauve and things mauve. So I'm an indigo child essentially a number. No. No. Eliza and crimson. That's what it is. Okay. All right. Van Dyke Brown. Deck. I very specifically quickly all the colors that Bob Ross used. There was no mistake, happy accident. That's right. And here's called happy accident. Oops. Well, eventually they found humor in it at least so. Also, go to Facebook dot com slash hysteria. Fifty one that's is our regular Facebook page tweet us at. Patriot. Or you can get a shirt, you ain't get up host or you can sniff John Goforth. Do all those things. Not sure host your own show. Patriots dot com slash hysteria. Fifty one though, sniffing and see. Right. And I have the rope so they can get a rope. Seven seven three six six nine seven two seven seven. We're going to get back to voice most coming up very soon, because we have a pressure, I we're not going to do in this week we're down to a hundred and q. So we let them build back up, Kevin, though. Yeah. We're, we're foregoing the voicemail so we can talk about something called sad times sad times sad times. That's what we call it when Kevin comes over. Yeah. Or when Kevin wakes up, yeah. Yeah. Or is awake? Sees a mirror. Yeah. Right. No. I've, I've show that I just started on the girlfriend is always smiling. She's sitting in the studio with us. Uh-huh. She's always smiling like, does she just take all the happy and, and you, you're left with the sad or has it? No, I pay her to be happy. Usually are got to pay for the happiness myself. So yeah, I know I have a show called sad times and each week. I bring on somebody, and we have discussions about how they are when they're sad kind of, how they act, the type of things that make them sad and kind of how that's affected their life and how it affects the lives of those around them. I often find that I'll get a little too into my head about these things. And I just feel it would be really beneficial. If we is people talked a little bit more about the stuff that, that makes us sad. Right now. He's streaming weekly on twitch. You can find it also on YouTube. We are going to be working that into a podcast coming out, you guys want to check it out. Just go to Facebook look up sad times. We have a page, we have a group rain. I are going to be working on that with him. I'm running the production of that show. Coming up that description of that of that show. Sounds like every time I've gone to the barbecue, right. Yeah. I'm just trying to monetize that. So I can go to the bar more fair enough that makes sense. So I'm here. Yeah. Everyone make sure keep your pets spayed neutered and also, where are those condoms, because we don't need errant. Indigo children coming out anymore because I'm not ready for that level of evolution is look what the seventies did they produced me and prog rock. That's my point. Yeah. With that said, I've been Brent. I've been Kevin Ivan Ray. I've been John. He's been conspiracy bitch. Stay woke meet sex. I'll never get over. That's it for a number of division of hysteria. Fifty one Joan Bren Toby back next week. We've yet more of the unexplained the unexplored and the unheard of. Oh, if it's unheard of how would they know about it? Anyway, if you want to suggest a topic, give us your thoughts or just Mike fun of conspiracy votes. That's my favorite. Join us in our Facebook discussion group hysteria nation. Just log onto Facebook and search hysteria nation, all you can always tweet us at hysteria. Fifty one pot. You've been listening to four hundred shines. Hey, animal lovers on Kate. Golden, I studied psychology and evolutionary, biology, and hosta comedy, educational puck has called creature feature. The podcast delves into the most. Unbelievable animal and human behaviors on the planet every Wednesday guest comedians and scientists delve into the minds of the craziest creatures. Evolution has concocted. We ask are we really that different from our hairier cousins? Iheartradio is number one for podcasts. But don't take our word for it fine creature feature on the iheartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Mr. Kevin Crispin ADHD Nancy John Brent Mike Kevin Ivan Ray Facebook iheartradio apple Dani Shapiro Chicago Lawrence horn Jaden Smith Joe Greenland Michael John goat UK Hawaii
It Happened in Florida 06-24-2020

Woody & Wilcox

07:36 min | 1 year ago

It Happened in Florida 06-24-2020

"Uh. Woody and Wilcox show. We're GONNA. Get into this round of it happened in Florida but Chelsea I. Do have more information about having to tell the public not to microwave their library books, so we can get to that a little bit later, but in the meantime this round of it happened in Florida. Eight four four four. WW Show is the way that you can get into being official contestant. What are you gonNA share three stories that are taken right out of the headlines of the day, and they're all true obviously, but they could have happened anywhere all over the world. You have to spot the one that went down in the incredibly consistent state of Florida what he's got story number one for us. Start Number one is about one neighbor filing a lawsuit against another neighbor if they didn't provide DNA for a paternity tests. We've heard this before, right? Thank the neighbor next door. Neighbor could be the father in this particular case, a little bit different and this woman is suing her next door neighbor all so a woman for DNA for a goat paternity test. She's the greatest of all time. NOPE, an actual goat! Oh, she paid nine hundred dollars for five Nigerian dwarf goats in December. She was going to register the those goats with the American Dairy Goat Association, but her application was rejected. And that's why she is suing to get DNA for a paternity test those that are registered with the ad, a have a higher value in the goat world than other goats. It's a lot to process I'm really struggling through that. Florida eight four four four ww show certain were to I can't say anything that falls under the heading of fun or potentially even funny Nah. It's not but. It's also something that I think we all need to pay attention to. It's about a family that sadly had a loved one. In the hospital, due to Cova Nineteen, and this particular person was in the intensive care unit, and was on a ventilator, heard these stories before now here's where the lesson comes in apparently in this particular hospital They had shut down the AC. No air conditioning. Because especially in the ICU they don't want that. Air Circulating and potentially pushing the virus around the intensive care unit, so they went ahead and shut the The A. C. Down. Only that came in to visit their loved one thought well I. Know How we can get around that. We'll go ahead and bring in our portable AC unit. I feel like that's probably frowned on anyway, but maybe somehow they were able to squeeze that by security there at the hospital. Here's where the troubling part comes in When you bring in any honestly any electric item. Make sure you know what you're unplugging to plug your item and. Because apparently, this family unplugged their loved ones Vanna later so that they can plug in their portable AC unit. No I'm sorry. I mean that's the thing that looks like the accordion. Right I'm not a violator expert, somebody. You would know if it stopped. It didn't stop immediately. Great Question Chelsea. Why wouldn't it have a battery backup? It does have a battery backup. Unplugged it plugged their portable A. C. Unit in and everything was working fine until the battery backup died, and so they didn't realize that there was a correlation between a C. and ventilator stopping until. The to stopping. My question for you is Florida very important lesson what he has the third and final third volume story has to do with twelve postal workers being treated for what was initially thought to be a bioterrorism package. I guess the good news story number three is. It wasn't bioterrorism. What do you think was in the package? That caused six of them. To go to the hospital and another six to be treated on the scene underwear, somehow weird insect your Chelsea's close on underwear. It was that stinky fruit I. Don't know if I'm saying it right as Durian. Somebody sent a package of Durian fruit. And it made six postal worker so sick that they had to go to the hospital. You can make a postal worker sick. That's something right and we know because we have more postal workers listening to this show than any other radio show in America it was just from the sent coming from the package that made them sick. Cool cobain's yes, I come from the package. Why would someone eat that? Then? Kobe's your valid question. The horse due to the unknown content. It was initially unclear whether the suspect package posed a greater risk, so they had to evacuate the building before they realized. Disapprove people. Are Bad. Guys feeling better all right. Let's get back to deliver packages. The only time I ever hear about this particular food is on. It happened in Florida. Is this really a thing? Because the only time I ever hear about it is when someone mistakes it for something ungodly, and we always have a story about it on. It happened in Florida, but I've never I'm not a Y.. Go into the fruit I'll at the grocery store and go. Oh, there's stinky fruit. Like where do you get it? You have to go online. Black Market for this fruit quake. Great Question. Thank you Chelsea. I don't have any answers for you and I apologize. What we'll get some, we have the best listeners on the planet. We'll get some I. Don't think we want anybody to send us some based on what I'm here. Big Mike would await the jury and right now we'll get answers i. think is what well. Also Google fingers work so I'm going to work on it. My fingers work Kobe's. I to try and solve our quiz. Which one do you think went down in the plywood? Stay, Robbie! Thank you, you're gonNA, go with the stinky fruit. Not, even in this country Germany is where twelve postal workers were treated for medical conditions. Another thirty were evacuated from the building the city of Nuremberg a fifty year, old resident of the town had been sent the fruit from a friend. That's all it says. Fifty fifty shot going out to Brian. What do you think? Brian, which one of these last two stories went down to Florida? Story number two story number two also not Florida also not in this country. Either India is where the family brought along the portable AC unit and unplugged their loved ones ventilator plug that in it was one hundred six degrees inside the hospital apparently. Seems a little toasty The doctor has filed a complaint saying that the patients relatives had quote misbehaved and been negligent and quote, and they have set up a committee to look into this case further. Alright David. There's one left. Can you solve our quiz? On a whim what story number one they're? Hillsborough Florida is where one woman is suing her next door neighbor also a woman for a paternity tests. On her goat. Dorothy and we'll see.

Florida American Dairy Goat Associatio Kobe Hillsborough Florida official A. C. Unit Woody India Air Circulating Brian Vanna Nuremberg Wilcox Cova Google Cool cobain America Germany
RWT12 Reminiscing with Tom - Grandmother Pynes and visits

Weird Wacky Wonderful Stories Podcast

08:32 min | 8 months ago

RWT12 Reminiscing with Tom - Grandmother Pynes and visits

"I used to love sitting down with my grandfather telling me stories of old the older and better days used to say well, he's no longer here to share those stories and I wish I had cataloged them home. That's why I felt such an affinity to Tom a listener from Alabama know living in Berlin who started sending us recordings of his memories of growing up enjoyed this short true story read by Tom himself in this special edition of the show where Colin reminiscing with Tom I remember going to my grandmother's and the summer to her form about a hundred miles north of mobile. Her old farmhouse was at the end of a typical dirt road of Alabama, which ended quite exotically under an adultery. She had no grass around her own home only said if you could get rich on Sand we would have inherited a fortune from her off when we would finish playing in the yard. She would hand each of us and broom made of wired together branches and tell us raped the sand so that it won't look like a message. When you finished pumping all over my yard. We were also instructed not to hold hands and jump over the homemade broomstick or would be married to each other just like them. I use used to do so long ago. Those were her words. We always followed those instructions closely because I didn't want to marry my cousin. Anyways, you say I like girls better now The Farmhouse typical for the South was on concrete blocks and rather high up. I presume the air that flowed underneath help keep the place cool down the page on Southern summer days to paint a better picture of the Old Homestead. It was surrounded by large fields of sweet corn back and to the front grandma raised peanuts and sometimes peas are string beans. The land was granted to her grandfather from the Indian Land grass and the home itself was placed in the middle of it all not a bit of land was wasted if it didn't grow cell or help maintain their existence. It had no job. Business being there. There was one exception and that was the old old tree. It provided shade in the front yard and from its massive bowels Hong I grew up with a huge star at the end of the trust to swing on that is when it wasn't too hot to move the porch ran the full length of the front of the house and was home for for us kids to bring the old plow horse around to mount up and ride. It was also used as a second dining room. This porch was for the kids. During the family get-togethers. The adults would eat inside and we would take our plates piled with mounds of fried chicken fresh sweet corn and sweet pea out to the porch to eat and act silly. We mustn't forget the Tall Glasses of over sweetened iced tea and lemonade that made you pucker with each mouthful dead. Also grandmother would make her own ice cream. Hm that was good. Now for the underside the rooms were sparse to say the least the kitchen consisted of one table and a wood-burning stove. I remember chopping wood for my grandmother so she could cook those fantastic meals. She would always send me to the well to fetch water. She would always issue this morning being careful at the edge of the world. There is a cave in on one side. So don't go down there in sure to lower the bucket from that other side so you don't fall in I'm holding now. So you see I must have followed the instructions pretty well the lights in the house were simply electric wires hanging from the center of the room with a Bare Bulb at the end and a chain hung down to turn them on or off or what about a toilet. Yep. Yes. Yes, she had an outhouse that in each room at night. We had a so-called slop jar with a handy lid and another warning Crown each other when you get up at night, do you think don't get go over the slot drawer you all have to clean up the mess yourself in the morning. I can live with all of that. But my biggest problem was that was Southern mosquitoes when they didn't make that high pitch sound young knew they had landed and so the mosquitoes are smart and have tons of patient. My father wants lady overheard the mosquitoes one night arguing whether to eat us on the spot or take us out into the field out back to take their time. Somehow. I didn't believe him. I don't know why but that's another story besides the old plow horse. My grandmother had a billy goat. We would hook to go table to a little red wagon of my cousin and I want to have a fun trip around the yard that is until he lost interest the goat. I mean off and then the van ended by the way mentioning that cousin. I had actually grown up with this cousin thinking he was a cousin but I was shocked to learn about Iran that he was my uncle not really a point of Interest except to me maybe that we were the same age and I assumed he was my cousin at this point all animal lovers forgive me or cover your ears one day. My question is my uncle decided to ride the billy goat bear back. He comb the Beast over and mounted him grabbing the horn firmly in hand the goat decided that he wasn't going to Cotton to this so he lowered his head. Ran as fast as he could towards the Farmhouse now Do You Remember by those houses? Were they go did and darted under the house. The next thing I heard was a hollow pum pum pum pum pum repeated about six or seven times. It was the Raptors underneath. I looked on as the goat exited the other side of the house took my uncle if you will still firmly mounted and holding tight. I ran after the to manage to stop the charging animal and my uncle fell to the ground with deep gashes in his forehead from the rafters glazed-over eyes. I remember asking him several times. Why didn't you let go I did Medco Bill. Well, just like those alien abductees who have reported lost time. He couldn't answer nor remember and as a song hopes, this is my story and I'm sticking to it sincerely Tom tune in again next time for more reminiscing with Tom off off off off the

Tom Alabama Old Homestead billy goat Indian Land Berlin Raptors Colin Iran Hong one day
I SEE YOU CRYPTIC ONE Eps. 19

Crystallized Beats - Underground Hip Hop News

11:57 min | 1 year ago

I SEE YOU CRYPTIC ONE Eps. 19

"What's up guys? This is crystallized beats where we focus on shining late on the talent in the shadows we will be playing music from new up and coming as as well as providing you with the links to the rest of their music and their social media. So check it out guys. What's that I'm crystal? Lamar I am the host of crystallize. Beat podcast as well as the head writer for never near stomping ground blog and I started this because I know how difficult it is to come up in the music industry and I wanNA give these new artists of boost and give them a platform where they can make a name for themselves. And I've worked with some really great artists and we have some phenomenal artists to come so definitely subscribe to our channel and keep checking us out so this is a first for crystallized. Beat podcast tonight. We have a second episode. A double feature for cryptic won the producer. Because this man is a genius and I hadn't had a chance to go through his entire catalogue before I recorded the first podcast episode. If I had I would have definitely added more tracks to that episode because this man is just a legend in the making he was a rapper. He's now our producer and he is just phenomenal. So we're GONNA be listening to a couple more of his tracks. We're going to start out with pulp nonfiction off the album. The Anti Moebius Strip bearing and the song has an old school vibe. It has dope lyrics and they tell a great story Let's get into it After very long search honor certain Verdeans atoll attorneys logically. You can't hear without wounds can't feel pain without pleasure. Measure brain without buffoons. A wise man says sharp-tongued until mine usually found confined to the same head ability. What you're capable of doing motivation reading terminal just what you'll do at determines. How will you just a little theory? I applaud and my lifestyle and news is Linda. Only calories. You could have been used to douse flames concerning affirmative grass. A wishes the fish. The goal is to wish to call for hope agreed. Mind is bigger fish to beat the bigger the worst you can say the more the more you can vote more you rely on the less you cook the less the less you eat the more than your stomach feels the more empty stomach. The more fishy require the more you fall in the design from the Stretcher. Titian completely missing lose sweat. Nothing if you're in certain asked Mikey question fires in year unless you will Judea Jihadi here in store cheered. Your retrievable took fingers top. Two from it didn't land on the mandate on new mom using theories of gravity. Is that fact of fiction? Genius Insanity Adam family packs language impacts traffic magical rats to make your plans practice laps into nothing and nothing could be strain. Nothing in the hands of a man that's damage stay up paying knocking. Change with brain questions. Vermont St Louis Credo so prostate tissue full under the table like Riedel Godson by hand and news challenge atom language. And we'll manage to fool fact graphic memories within building cash of graphic negative development in this. It's imperative to Scott sooner wasting time apart from the Patia. Clump fatigue in this race through Tom Amount for first place. There's nothing less start import place finish lawn crazy that form where a lightning storm screaming. It's all about the Benjamin. Franklin inventive honest with freshly charges picture soaking spoke fishing. This Guy Tara. Some cases took food so we just listen to cryptic ones pump non fiction off the album the anti moebius strip theory. You're definitely going to check that one out on Youtube. It's from like two thousand five but it's well worth a listen. We're going to get right into the next song. It is the hunt off the album. Truth whole truth half truths and lies. This is a had bumper with sleek lyrics and a vocal track. And it's just great. You're GONNA love it. Let's get into it. Critic one soul about the hunter killer about the real wishes truth when we talk on this to richest we roll through those stop. Signs in those with no skills will kill and we won't come breaks on these mountains. Molehills to show still goes into the old troll's jail still but still ask billy goat. Silly blow killer colts through we grow with suthin guerrillas. Let loose from the zoos. It's the crazy activates. Enthusiasms curb insidious show past the birds. Word case this man on the hall. I'm the Genre Server conduct back. If you continue to fry menus attract notice continue to harm on on a hunch on my doctor to break a heart more shop till the heart of time. A hunch on wall stopped. Break the damn on a hunt on stopped the heart kitty. I don't care what you say. If you C K next Tuesday backtrack acronyms that reply tracks. Faster than you can save on me agree atop mom why you cross yours and you sure can't see straight the crazy man greater family side mob with infinite plan insanity to live and Die Tragedy. Got Another kingdom. Fix Them Watch Your Majesty Cry. You don't King You just declare with a crowned squad bound to the sound your pa who gives a WHO DON'T POLLUTE. They can see a battlefield troops salute. Make this general. The talk at the stores get covered. Stay calm this carnage Bravo. That's the truth. Jump your ass was up. We can't stop won't stop. We got time. But that's the truth. Chill and we can't stop. Stop Me Gusta on a heart. Break the door behind on a hunt to the heart. I'm on upon the break. The door no more behind locked more doctor. The heart is I guys. So today we did a double feature of cryptic one the producers music. We started out earlier with a instrumental. Track called cynical bastards and we have since moved onto some lyrical tracks one called pulp nonfiction. And the second. Call the hunt and I'm GONNA put his information in the podcast notes. Definitely go check it out because this man is a a legend in the making case dismissed. Hey are you a producer and you're looking for some promo maybe looking for a platform where you can make a name for yourself. Then go to never near dot com slash submit and submit your links for review for feature. Thanks looking for more episodes of crystallized beat podcast. It's available now. On spotify stitcher anchor an cast box as well as our website. Crystallize BEETS DOT COM on tomorrow's episode of Crystallized Beats. We'll be listening to a new release from an up and coming male hip hop artist so definitely check us out.

producer Verdeans atoll Lamar writer Titian Vermont St Louis Credo spotify Mikey Linda Riedel Godson Patia Franklin billy goat Scott
Goat Simulator with Raj Ramayya

How Did This Get Played?

1:09:35 hr | 2 months ago

Goat Simulator with Raj Ramayya

"Right now on air will on an all new bitch sash. Casey wilson tearfully recounts the harrowing story of her fish. Sponges untimely passing more. Follow at your own social media. Happy listening we all know that video is the most effective way to capture. Someone's attention that or a hostage crisis. But the storytellers today are challenged with creating more video content at a higher quality than ever before literally never in human history have people needed more video content neanderthals. they weren't using video homo erectus. What's a phone thankfully story. Blocks makes it easy to keep up with the growing demands for modern video content. So you can bring all your stories to life and stop sacrificing your vision do time budget or resources. Every creator should have story block membership and with their affordable subscriptions. You can stay on budget while telling the best version of your story story. Blocks has an ever-growing library of one million high quality stock assets including four k. hd footage after-effects and premiere pro templates music. Images sound effects. And more your mozart. Your content is your symphony. And now you've got you've got after-effects and premier you're going to jam it into your content assets are royalty free and with their unlimited all access plan to unload it downloads of everything in the story blocks library. You want thirty minutes of shoes. I bet you can find it. I bet you can find footage of shoes on a white background. If you're a member of a creative a large creative team marketing agency or media organization story blocks has your back with comprehensive coverage for your entire company that enables you to distribute wherever whenever now. I'll be honest. I've been involved in an underground anti stab is gonna. I was tell some jokes personal experience but the truth is they gave me a subscription to the thing and i immediately made a fake ad and it was a lot of fun and very easy to do i. I'm i'm trying to take down the man using story blocks. Ah the interfaces. Great the i mean what. It's what do you want. what do you want it. Stock assets if you need stock assets. This is the way to go. Learn more and subscribe today at story blocks dot com slash. Played that's story blocks dot com slash. Played look up in the sky. Is it a bird. Is it a plane. No wait okay do you see this. Yeah i think it's a i mean. I don't know exactly how this happened. But it looks like it's a goat with its tongue. Stuck to a firework. I mean he's way up in the sky. Yeah like a like a mile up there. Oh shit oh. The firework went off. Oh god oh my god oh no. Oh god no gruesome. he's still falling. Oh my god oh no no no. I can't look again. Look i've got a look. I can't look oh my god. He's still falling. Oh god he's heading straight from a trampoline. Oh no so somebody help and do you do with falling this long. You still falling the trampoline or break his fall. Maybe it'll push it up a little bit. You still falling falling for so long. I feel like it's like a like a hefty bag. Full of a saas is about the hit the floor my god is he is still falling. He still following. Okay i i yeah. I miscalculated trajectory. He's actually sexually heading for that. Like grill outdoor grill still towards grill. I wait he's he's going up again. What happened. I'm going to go back in a meeting. I guess important papers delivered before three. He's falling again falling. I'm just gonna go stand behind but facing a bench. That's what i'm gonna do. It's gonna go stand over there in that location. Am i in a game. Oh my god. Am i not real. Oh my god. I'm not real. I went through the same thing a couple years ago. It's fine you'll adapt. I don't have a boobs or jonah. I flat dress i. I'll be honest. You don't even have skin under their cars hop fences and go fully limp just like fully limp like a hunk of goat meat in the road. Just limp is shit in twenty fourteen indie hit goat simulator this week on. How did this get played. Welcome to how did this get played the show where we discussed the worst and weirdest and walmart discount to benny est video games of all time. That third w was by corn dog. Whisperer submit yours at get played pod hashtag. www another. w nick. y girl. Heather anne campbell. I'm heather anne campbell along with our producer matt oppa daca. Hello everyone hello everyone and welcome back bucket edge so we have a legendarily weird game to discuss today but before we get to. That is first time as we always do to spend seventy seconds in gaming heaven mattress. And i wanna begin. Go for it all right. I can't. I don't know what episode we're in or where we are in the sequence of events but i have started playing assassin's creed valhalla. I have put in an enormous amount of time in my lunch breaks and before seven. Am or eight am in the morning. The only free time that. I have in the day and it's fantastic. People like jean park former former guest had said that it was fantastic. It's fantastic. I have not enjoyed any assassin's creed games until this one. But i plead for a while. Now i'm like eighty and in most games like level eighty after you've played for while you're nearing the top of the leveling process and there are enemies in this game where the recommended level to attack them are two hundred ninety typically. That's not a place that you arrive at. When you're leveling up your character. I guess the top level in the game is somewhere around four zero five four six. That's insane. the game is massive. It's a lot of fun. Also they just back the analog pocket until october it's staggering. How much content they put in these modern assassins creeds. It's like they want. They wanna give you like two hundred our experience if you do everything to guess as good but also like people got shit to do do you love. Our guest is a singer composer and voice actor who include cowboy bebop ghost in the shell and tower of god roger. Maya's here guys. Thanks for having me today. Oh my god. Thanks for making time for us. It's awesome to have you. I raj. I wanna start here because i know you have a lot of experience working in anime. But i'm curious about you as a as a gamer are you. Are you someone who plays video games regularly fairly regularly play lot. You know basically on my phone mobile games most of the time and i'm actually always working on mobile games here and there too. So oh wow so i try to play some of the mobile games max working on To get a good deal for them and it's It's fun you know. I can compare myself and other people out there by playing those mobile gives a damn that that composes. So good. I gotta get there. You know we'll see your processor when you're composing for a game is you're actually. You're you're putting some time and actually playing it. Yeah well. I i try to play similar games so i get a feel for what life is a tower defense game that i'm just gonna play a bunch of tower defense games and figure out like what they do and try to be a little bit different if i can but you know tower defense games are all the same anyway right so it's really hard to sort of like. Wow how do i. How do i do dungeon or do forest a slightly differently than everybody else right. So yeah. it's it's a kind of those. I i totally get what you're saying. There's kind of an expectation if you're in a certain environment that like what you're going to hear from sound design perspective and a music perspective. It's just kind of established through through a bunch of different games so addition to a dish into composing. I mentioned that you are voice actor and you have worked. I was looking at your credits. These are all correct. You've worked on some some notably odd and memorable games including schenn mutu. Yeah talion still. Battalion was the xbox game that had the gigantic controller that costs like ninety dollars and then and also resident evil dead. aim which was the The the shooter game one of the shooter games that came out of actually the light gun for the resident evil franchise right. Yeah i lived in japan for a few in japan for half my life. And so but i got involved in the whole music for games and anime and voiceover for games anime in tokyo. So just be my agent which is called me up. There's no auditions and they actually don't give you much information. You just kinda show up and do whatever they tell you to do for these game so And there have been so many wacky weird games that we've done and they've disappeared. I don't even know where they are right now and whether they would even release and stuff like that. So it's like it's been so weird games. A lot of weird games for sega. That never actually saw the light of day and Yeah it's been. It's been really fun doing the composing end the voice acting in a ton of fun. Because i get to see both sides of of what's going on. And i get yeah. I'm curious because i've heard this. And i i've never done voice acting for for games. I'm actually not sure heather has. You've you've done ads. You have to be i did. I did voice active video game. Uh back in two thousand ten or something. Okay but only one. That's the only one i've done so the thing i've heard from actors is that they're the process can be eating. Because like i like what you said raja's like you may not have a ton of context for what you're doing but then also in addition to just having like immense volumes of dialogue have to deliver. There's also a bunch of like you know just depending on the game but like you might have grunts and groans. You have to deliver a hundred different ways. Yeah yeah tons of grunts and groaning and screaming and then the japanese have their own idea of screaming which is different from the american idea of screaming to them. It's it's like you've been you've plunged a knife into your gut and your committing suicide kind of scream loud. Gurgling blood coming out stuff. Like i'm superior. Japanese seppuku thing. So right it's actually really different from american games. Because i just did some new american Game called blais sky and cast a two different characters. I'm either a southern white gentleman or an indian doctor. Those only two things. If you look you'll see that. I'm not even kidding. Just go see like a southern white guy from the south or an indian doctor. Every single thing. That i've done i i have a question. Which is you so. I'm a huge anime nerd. Cry so i have like a bit of starstruck edness currently with you on the show. So you you you worked with yoga khanna on cowboy bebop right and i can't figure out from the internet. Did you sing the real folk blues. Yeah i'm actually singing and dancing on ask dna. And then i. I did a redo redo of the real folk blues which came out in the summer and it was weird because we did. It has a charity for covid and it hit number six on billboard and we didn't even know we're all just growing beards graybeards in the studio. Did we get a whole covid. Released thing just for charity to raise money for doctors without borders. So we re did some cowboy bebop songs that i'd worked on twenty years ago and we so fucking cool say it sold sixty thousand copies of the vinyl and it hit number six on billboard and no one told us we found out about about a month later. Someone said oh. Yeah you know your song was up there and billboard what nobody even called me. No one said anything. You know bizarre but it just surprised me. How many fans were still intikhab. All these years later yeah. I bought a bootleg. See because this was when cowboy bebop came out. There is no way to get an animate soundtrack in the united states. Unless you drove to like a little tokyo in a big city more you bought a bootleg like or manage to download it from napster. But i don't even think nassar was around ninety. Nine ninety eight. I had a bootleg copy of the cowboy bebop soundtrack and me and my friends at the time. I'd like to friends who watched cowboy bebop and we would sing the real folk blues in the car. And i. This is the guys no. I don't get star struck about anything. I care about anything. I have no insides with nothing. Just fucking cool man of the of the anime that you've worked on what has been your favorite project like wh what's been or or not even favourite. What what's one of the most memorable ones for you. I think wolf's rain That there's so there's a song called strangers that i sing as well and everybody thinks i'm a cheque right. They the go that chicks got a great voice. You know and so it's been. I was like well. It's like ed but it's lasted for so long and it's very high. It's a very high pitched song so They think. I'm a japanese young japanese girl but i still find that flattering husky young japanese girl. That's been one of my favorites again. Yoko ono to So i worked with yoko and lots of different projects. I think there's only been about three or four. That have been released internationally and a lot of them have been domestic projects that i worked on with her. But i think that The most one of those members is will rain rain and of course cowboy bebop because we toured the album came out. It was such a huge success that none of us really understood what was going on it was just like wow and mays kind of found its place and yeah yeah yeah with americans especially. This is interesting because in japan. It wasn't that big. It was outside of japan. It was really. It really took off and We didn't realize that for a while either until we started seeing sales reports. And we're like. Wow this is this is really selling and people are into it. And it's it really. I think connected with americans more than anything else anybody else. It was definitely the first. I think entire series anime series. I bought on dvd and that was and it was. Also i think like and you know i'm not. I'm much less hardcore into anime than than heather. But i but you know it. It's definitely like like for an american audience. it's a it's a just a great entry point. Like if i had a friend who is like not into didn't know anything about anime they just get into it because it's just like a good shell and muffler. Accessory banking is a live action. Show so it still. It also has some longevity. That probably wasn't expected at the time. It's just fucking great cowboy bebop awesome. Yeah thanks i mean it just keeps on going. It's just weird. I thought it would die a long time ago but it just keeps on goi that walking dead show right. It's coming back of so as a outside of your your own work. Russia there any video game composers or scores from particular games. That you that you admire that you're like like oh this is This fucking nailed. This one You know. I work with a lot of other composer. One of my favorite composers names will row j. and he's done the mortal new mortal kombat score and he's just an amazing amazing composer So i get a chance to meet other composers and talk with them and work with them once in a while It will definitely one of my top top favorite composers and Yesterday nikki he just Did the new final fantasy game The soundtrack for that too and then another young composer from From england that i worked with call kevin pankin Who did power of god and then a really a quirky underground and may we did about four years ago. The took off called made in abyss and it was just like this weird underground anime. That was really quite low budget but really took off and it's been it's actually made his whole career is really it's really satish them. checking vhs. To made the best. I think the soundtrack is killer. And yeah it's it's just a. I don't know it's just one of those really heartfelt enemies people cry when they see it and And it's it's just touched a nerve with a lot of young people and it's been it's been great so far for that. So that's yeah definitely kevin pankin will rosia and yes nor nikki. Those three people are often path traveler travel. Yeah he's a pass right so we. We worked with him on track. I'm not supposed to do a game. It is yet just Hasn't come out yet but He's famous for octopus traveler. And he's taken over from noble way matsu from final the final fantasy franchise and he's the new. He's a new job way. We matsue kind of deal and He's younger keep going for another another twenty years. He's got twenty years at himself He's up and coming. So yeah there've been so great composers. And i work with so many people that have been influenced by japanese composers and they were all kind of in that in that japanese game and anime world where we're been influenced by that and it's sort of it's it's kind of going back and forth. It's like i was tell people that. The japanese grabbed their ideas from other places. Make them better than sell them back to us and let cars and everything else. And i had an argument with one guy. That curry actually came from japan. And i said no. No no. You're not you're not sliding that one by me of all people right. What about about the the other side of it for abuses standpoint which is the which is music based video games likely rhythm games. I do play those do. Are there any in particular responded to. Did you ever like someone who's an actual musician. Did you ever mess around with like rock band. No but i was. I worked on beat mania and rhythm maniac notice for years ago so you can hear me singing on some tracks on the mania. Some cheesy nineties How house music. Yeah but i mean. I love all that stuff for sure. It's just you know it's so weird. Because i'm so busy working on the games that don't have a chance to play them. So yes i. I'm always seeing these great games. And i'm gonna like jesus. I wish i had an extra hour to play this time. I i've mentioned this before. In the podcast buddy. I used to work in development. I was a designer might credits or dog shit compared to yours but it was a similar sort of thing. I was just like when i had a. We have a playstation controller on your desk and a dev kit. It was like that was occupying so much by time and then also just like mentally it was like it was not an escape to play video games so i have. I have something of a little bit of a gap in in my gaming knowledge that just kind of spans. The years i was actually working in the industry. It's an intense industry. I mean i'm sure if the rest of your worked in the game people. I remember capcom in tokyo. They would literally be sleeping under their desks. Come i remember coming in the morning and just seeing like people futons sleeping underneath the desk. The developers You know for them. It's just hard core. That real japanese like we got the gun by the way they just. They just work almost work themselves to death. You know to make sure that it's the best that it can be possibly be in that sense of commitment to things and they you know they they just live and breathe these games. You know it's incredible. It's incredible how committed they are to the whole thing. I get it like all these developers that i now they they either commit to it and make it or your life's work or you can dabble in it right. Yes thank you commit to it. And make it your. Life's work or you bail on it completely and later star- podcasts. We all know that video is the most effective way to capture. Someone's attention but the storytellers of today are challenged with creating more video content at a higher quality than ever before thankfully story blocks makes it easy to keep up with the growing demands for modern video content. So you can bring all your stories to life and stop sacrificing your vision due to time or resources on time under budget using fewer resources pick to like the sign says every creator should have a story blocks membership and with their affordable subscriptions. You can stay on budget while telling the best version of your story story. Blocks has an ever-growing library of one million high-quality stock assets including four k. hd after-effects. An premiere pro templates. Let me tell you. As an after effects. And perot user templates will save your skin sometimes music images sound effects and more assets are royalty free. That's huge and with their unlimited. All access plan you get unlimited downloads of everything in the story blocks library. If you're a member of a large creative team marketing agency or media organization story blocks has your back with comprehensive coverage for your entire company that enables you to distribute wherever whenever man if i was still making content if i was someone who'd be like. Hey i have an idea. Why don't they bring that to life. Instead of lending it live out. Its entire lifespan. Within my brain be story blocks all the time. If i was on a team you know. I mean it's it's it's it's a great resource with a lot of high quality audio and video assets. Learn more and subscribe today at story blocks dot slash played that story blocks dot com slash. Played this podcast is sponsored by better. Help if you're feeling depressed or struggling with relationships or having difficulty sleeping or meeting your goals better help offers online professional counselors. Who can listen and help. I mean i'm pretty straightforward. About the fact that i'm in therapy when i'm on the podcast. I mean the podcast isn't therapy. But i'm in therapy. I talk among the podcast in therapy. I'm probably going to talk about recording this ad in therapy. It's there the best thing that you can do for yourself. It's it's the doctor for your brain. It come on better help will assess your needs and match you with your own. Licensed professional therapist. You can start communicating and under forty eight hours wherever you are in the world. it's not crisis line. It's professional counseling done. Securely online offering a broad range of expertise which may not be locally available in many areas. So log into your account anytime and you can send a message to your counselor. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions and they make it easy and free to change counselors if needed better. Help is more affordable than traditional offline. Counseling and financial aid is available in fact so many people have been using better help that. They're recruiting additional counselors in all fifty states and our listeners. Get ten percent off their first month of online therapy at better help dot com slash played visit better h e l p dot com slash played and join the over one million people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced. Better help professional. Well let's Let's let's talk about this week's game goat simulator right right well. Goat simulator is a third person. Look okay i so. I tried to tell my mom. What goat simulator was. Because i was trying to figure out how to describe goat simulator. Two people who hadn't played or heard of goat simulator. It is a third goat action game. Because you're not playing a person you're you're but the game is not you don't this. There's not like a point to the game it is. It is a world where you are an interactive element in the shape of a goat and the goal is to do mischief or wreak havoc. It is not hustle game. Like what goose game like untitled goose game. Raise not a game with successive multiplying goals. Like category damn ac- which also takes place and just like this large open playground. This is a game where you are effectively. Playing a design element in a game and that is the game. It came out in two thousand and fourteen for microsoft windows and was ported to lennox noah's ex than android xbox three sixty xbox one playstation three playstation four and most recently to the nintendo switch in two thousand nineteen. It started as a joke prototype from an internal one month game. Jam held by the developer coffee stain studios and win. The footage from that game jam was released to the internet. People were like. Oh you should actually bring out the game. And thus goat simulator happened. What i mean i like your you. You characterize their well because it is just basically like a sandbox physics demo like there is. They're scoring there are achievements but there's none of the structural elements that make it feel like a game that cut amari has a timer and you have to get to a certain sky size within this this timeframe in order to progress to the next mission. There's nothing like that. It's just like here's this world run around and cause problems. Same thing with untitled goose game. Would you compare to has discrete objectives. Like knock execute this checklist and then you can get to the next area. There's nothing like that. There's no real objectives here except to just mess around seen comparisons to tony hawk but even tony hawkes. Pro skater has which it has. The trick system seems kind of like you know to take very much taken from at least how the tricks are scored and mowlem lied to kinda. Seems like that's taken from from tone from tony hawk franchise but it but again tony hawk. You have like a threshold. You're trying to hit within a timeframe in order to progress. There's there's just nothing like that. None of those elements present with the goat. You can jump. You can run. You can hit things and you can lick objects and when you lick a yoshi action where you get you get tethered to the object. So if you lick a human you can drag them behind you in rag doll physics and throw them at something i but describing. That makes it sound like you have control over what you're doing more like a barely controlled falling down a hill like that's the experience of this game. It's not you can't really do any of the things that you're attempting to do. You try them like one of the early goals in one of the levels is jump from one trampoline to another and it's like okay. Well you jump from one trampoline to another that that is like the the like that's like the the level of achievement it's can you jump is like west is asking right full. It's got so it's got things like that it's like okay. This is this particular tasks. This specific task is like in densely difficult. But then there's also things where it's just like because of the score system works you can accuse you can accumulate huge number of points just by basically like fumbling around and just button. Mashing like you can you can pull off gigantic combos if you're just around the a certain set of objects and you're just fumbling as much as a as you can't but i'm the game feels like a really committed bit. I guess which again is yeah. It's it's it's surgeon simulator. another similar simulator. Game is kind of close to what this game is. But i'm curious had you messed around with goat simulator prior to this. No and a really really relieved that you guys told me. There's no point to the game. Because i was starting to wonder about myself. Heck is going on right. He you know. I thought there was a trick to it now. Clearly there is no trick to the game. he doesn't do anything right so The tethering was pretty cool. That was really interesting to know. I'd never tried previous to this. I i've actually never seen anything quite like because you don't really do anything right. You don't write goanywhere so yeah and yet two point. Five million copies were sold by two thousand fifteen like this is a hit like the game is like not. It's not a small indie game with like five hundred thousand people. Pod bought it. And we're like oh this is fun this is this is a hit. It was covered extensively on youtube. And that's how it became famous as people were like. wow. I got hit by a car. As the goat and thrown into the clouds and duplicating that would be impossible. And that's the point of the game is to create these mimetic moments and and showed them to a I don't know friends who were over or your online streaming community. I i do feel like to follow up on your point out of there. I do feel like this. Yeah this game got its legs through streaming. Because i kind of as it was playing this and we should mention mentioned this earlier for anyone. Who's listening to a podcast and wants to mess around with. It is right now available on game pass so like if you have game pass you can you can check it out there because you might play it for a half hour and be like all right. I get this. I'm i'm done with this. It definitely feels like a game. That's more fun to watch someone else. Played into play yourself like i. I didn't find the game play. I guess if you were if you were someone who like really fanatically wants to get to the top of the leaderboard. This might work for you. But i'm not that type of gamer. And and so. I just kind of kinda got bored with it quicker than i expected. I dunno raj. What did you what did you as far as the actual game play. Yeah i mean again. I just didn't know what i was supposed to be doing. So i was just i was just. I just enjoyed seeing the goat break. Its neck every time it hits something in that was found and then i just did that several times and at yeah i did. I don't know. I just was totally confused. I was thinking like dancers. Something i supposed to go somewhere and and you know the the baseball shooter thing came onto the back of the goat your that they were shooting and i didn't know where that came from either so i was totally confused by after about ten fifteen minutes but but he was cool is interesting and but i'm just wondering what was the selling point of the game. What what triggered people to to by and large numbers. What what was it. That sold that game. I personally think the titled as a ton of the work. I gain called goat. Simulator is perfectly internet random for people who are into that sort of thing and and like heather was saying. I think this is a this would probably they probably you can probably see direct line to when people were streaming at and to win sales increased. Because you see someone else playing this and maybe you want to mess around with it yourself. I but but yeah i mean i guess that's the big thing is like is the easily like i said it's kind of like a really committed bit. Is it like earned really. That's what i was kind of thing of just like a like. I don't know because i want like i'm shit talking an indie developer who creates some swedish students who made something that was a gigantic. Hit that a lot of people had joy. So i i'm not trying to to be too negative here but just like as far as something to play. It feels like it's it's it's kind of clunky and busted by design. But then again if that's what they were trying to do like i don't. I don't know i don't know how to criticize. I don't know what to say about this game. It's such a weird experience. The did you experience so for me. I was like is this is this. Is this enjoyable to do. And there was one moment of joy that i experienced while playing around with this game. Which is that iran. The go into. I've thought other goats and my goat became musk muscular. Yes and then ramming him into a tractor and the physics caught the goat in such a way that he was shot way up in the air so that the map became like a pinpoint on the screen. And then like all these points are racking up and it's like saying you know like awesome hang time and like goat goat somersaults and it was like a full thirty seconds of falling and you can toggle whether or not to engage rag doll physics like it was. I was like that part. That moment was fun. And i feel like that's the joy of the game is sort of creating your own video game given the tool racket and then looking for something fun to do given that you can do anything in the world like. Can you get the goat on the ferris wheel. And if you do it wrong. Does the goat end up getting shot across the map. Yeah i was. There's a helicopter. And i was trying to do something with helicopter. I couldn't figure out how to interact with a helicopter. There's like things like that but then like the fireworks similarly like you get attached to a firework and go go super super high in the air. It's i had a moment playing this game. Where so you can head but things and you can lick things. And you know you'll get achievements for for licking objects headbutting objects and the same thing with with people and creatures But i head butted a woman who's minding your own business but hey it was. I was trying to commit to the game by the head of the woman and then the sound called the plate is she immediately started crying. It was so. I was like jesus right allies woman. They should let you eat. The goat at the end of the game barbecue is a barbecue. Pit shows up barbecue the goat. There's a ton of deal see that's been released for this I know there's the the mama which i think is included in the main package and then there's a bunch of other ones. There's like a there's like a daisy tie in a so. This thing is this thing really has had legs beyond its initial release. Like i've kept pumping out. Dlc and people buying it yeah. It's i mean it's it's a success story. And what when i was again when i was like prepping for this episode and i called my mom and i was like. I'm trying to train articulate how this game is and i wanna know if what i'm saying to you makes any sense. Her follow up question to me was. Is it a game for babies. I was no and she's like. Who is the intended audience for this game. You just run around as a goat and you hit things. And i was like i think adults and gamers are the intended audience. And she's like okay. I don't get that from what you're describing. It sounds like like a baby's ipad game. And i was like no okay. No she was getting mad at you. My mom is perpetually mad at me now she. She's frustrated anytime. I take her. I asked her to leave. What's a fucking game that we all got to starter. Oh yes she's like she's like what am i have a question. And she's an hold on. I gotta pause or what. She's now i take guys earlier. And i don't want to tip my hat for the review crew later but what. I'm trying to find exactly what i said because i had a strong reaction to it earlier. You feel sick. it made me sick. Yeah so i was just. I don't know because i can play games. That don't have a point or like that. Don't necessarily herat your hand in in. You know in instructing you had to play but this was just like i just i hadn't experienced anything like it before at least in a long time and because you read goat simulator. I know that there are other simulator games like farm truck or whatever So i was thinking that it would be a little more literal you do actual goats stuff or at the very least be. We brought up untitled juice game earlier. But i didn't even like that game that much but like that you would be playing out. In a way that you would think a behaves at very least at least goose goose's comically evil. And you can sort of like in your mind be like the goose would be like that but this note the good that you're playing i've ever seen behave this way at all and i would be horrified if i saw about doing the things that go did it in this game. Well yeah this. This goat can is basically ruining a city. Yeah and everyone is helpless to do. Anything about it shattering storefronts and looking all the furniture. I as. yeah it's it's the the there's two categories i feel like with the simulator games. There are the ones where it's like. They're trying really hard to simulate what it's like to be. Be the engineer of a train in europe. Like mrs like. They're trying to accurately represent this as much as possible. And then there's all the memes simulator games which like surgeon simulator is is another what we bet you've covered on the show and this falls in this category. I knew its nature going in. I just didn't. I just assumed there was a little bit more like new. It's mean quality. I just assume there was a little bit more of a core of core gameplay but it really is just kind of a sandbox. And i'm repeating myself because what i mean. What else is there to say. there's say made it. There's there's there's just not a ton to this one of the one of the things one of the interesting criticisms i saw leveled against or celebrating goat simulator. Was that the game along with i am. Bread and surgeon simulator are called youtube bait and that they are games specifically designed to create a visual element. That is interesting to look at when broadcast but not particularly interesting to play. I think that's a really. I mean i'm not gonna teach a fucking game course here it at college of us but like it's i i think that's a really it's an interesting model of game design is like sure. What if you made something so weird. That people played it on youtube and then to play it on youtube generated views for the player therefore other people wanted to play it so that they could get the views like. It's almost like a secondary it's emerging economy zim sense Yeah one hundred percent and it's interesting that we saw with among us which we also covered on the show that was like inadvertent like they weren't trying to be in fact that game like didn't even have any real commercial success until several years after its release when people started streaming it. I it's yeah you're right. It absolutely does feel like it just kind of created for that purpose and it succeeded russia. I'm curious as someone who works on the audio side of things. Did you have any any takes on the sound design or the sound jenner on goat simulator. Well i once. I thought that the game was called. Goats stimulator i was like. Oh wow it's okay. Sorry right. So i don't know i. I missed the whole thing from the beginning. So anyway i thought the audio was kinda weird at times because the decries the the the the The voiceover seemed like oddly. Flat like not really expressive which was actually stood out. Because of that like some you know. Ha ha ha right. There's no like owes like well. That's kind of weird interesting. And i don't know if they did that on purpose but some of it just seemed I don't know it. it just seemed like they. They didn't want to put lead emotion into some of the voice over the laughing and the crying and things like that seem very generic. But i don't. I don't really know why but i guess there was must have been some kind of reason for doing things like that. I agree it seemed like an artistic choice. I think to me. I think it was just maybe to be random like it was just like sort of to make it. Kinda feel in inhuman and weird. I guess you could say if you if you bore. Charitable interpretation would be like that what would perceive human language to an emotion to be like. It's it's weird. I also do wonder like this. I don't know. I mean there were parts of it. That made me laugh. I think there are parts that are like like joyous and funny. So i i do get the appeal for that side at. Thanks though i do wonder if this is like the sweetest developers like no. This is very serious. A swedish accent. Yes it is cut. That was your home. That is the swedish accent displayed for a professional voice actor on the show. I mean honestly it really were a little early in the runtime for this. But i kind of feel like we should just get to our final thoughts on this heather. I think it's time for our review crew. Do you like drag it out. Like i could just like go river. Does that help nick. Though is great that bought us eight seconds. So we'll say something positive about goat simulator that stimulator and and and give it a new miracle decibel rating. I mean i guess. I like like the you know the the names of as you're going through and you're doing a bunch of different like combos doing a bunch of moves your string them together. I guess i kind of like some of the names of those. When it's like you strung together like a bench lick with like a you know a miles head but the characters will have like names in the game. Interact with so. I think that's kind of fun and do think this i don't know i think it's cool that this exists and god bless these indie developers for being able to have a breakthrough hit that they made on their own. It's so tough to even. Just get anything made so then for people play it and enjoy it. I mean that's the dream. So i get it. I'm just gonna go right down the middle of this. Because i think it's not for me but i'm glad that it exists so i'm gonna give it a five point now heather man. You stole my score right out from under me. I've been thinking about whether or not look. This isn't i. Didn't there were so few moments of actual enjoyment wild playing the game but when they would hit. I was like that was fun. Yes but it's it's a little bit like i don't know. I wish that there was some. I wish there was more control in the game. I wished that it was a the same sort of like insane world. But you had some move set or set like if i could play crato in a physics engine where he could like jump off shit and bounce off things but also interact with objects with that. Same sort of crispiness. Then i feel like i would have enjoyed it more but i mean like do you complain about a game. That's like does exactly what it's supposed to do which is just like here's a wet beanbag a throw it all over the place and so yeah. I'm going to give it a five. It's not bad it's huge. There's so much content and so many weird like weird things to do like become mcqueen of a goat castle or knocked down stonehenge. There's weird shit to do a five. It's a five from me. Matt what do you got. So yeah i mean i. I said it made me sick. Because i did get a little nauseous playing it because of just how the controls i wish it was a little smoother It's not you know it wasn't completely uninformed. Because i think part of what makes games like this fun is like make giving yourself a task so i'm walking around as the go and i don't know what i'm supposed to do but i see that there's a big water slide and i was like okay. Well i can get up there. And this is my positive big got up to the top of that waterslide and i- ragged all the way down the water slide. And i though it land right in the pool i did not. I completely missed the pool. I like went like three houses over like the very very funny that that was even possible rate. But it's not a game. Would i'm not gonna. I don't know i don't see myself going back and dipping into the deal see. I'm not too concerned about what the zombie go can do. Or any of the other I did see that you can get different skins so like you don't have to be a goat. You can be like a dinosaur an elephant for all sorts of things. That was kind of interesting to me too. But not probably not going to dip into that. So i'll get right down the middle five as well five around so far. I should've. I should've messed around with the momodou. Because they did hear the. I heard her. That was like pretty fun and a pretty good satire of them. i'm oh tropes and conventions But yeah i think to your point. Matt this has been a good game pass game. I think you have game pass and try it out but You know and mess around with it because who knows how. How fucking how. M- how much legs will have for you all right raj your positive thing about goat simulator and your score. Well if they'd called a goat stimulator have gone for like seven point five but since it with the boring sorta title. I'm gonna give it a five as well. So yeah yeah. I agree with you guys. It's just it's just. I wouldn't pay for it but it's kind of fun to check it out. Well there you go. Fives all around for goat. Simulator heather maybe we're wrong. Maybe we were wrong. Pat reviews from all over the internet that gives us a contrary opinion so we said it was good then it would be a bad view and it was bad review. The new might be we. If we gave a bad review it would be a good review but since we went right down the middle here. I any kind of review is up for grabs. It's just maybe we were wrong. And i've got to review here from men from metacritic. I think from april second. Twenty fourteen by zion sipe. It's a neat idea. Not fixing bugs and making a joke game like this. My problem is ten fucking dollars. Ten dollars really for that's like pay ten dollars for one time. Hand buzzer and shaking your own hand if it were free that sure that makes sense. Why don't make a joke game avatar when people buy it for free. The thing about this is it's entertaining for about twenty minutes and you've done everything in is just an other untouched icon on your desktop. What's worse is just every youtube. Video has youtube has made a video of this and playing. It doesn't give you any more satisfaction than watching the video does no replay value no excitement to play no storyline. This game is just a joke. No thanks good points. Make some fair points. I get one from summer cannon. This is on amazon. This is a one star review entitled. This game has strong satanic propaganda. Here here is the text. I should have done. Further research into a seemingly innocently named game. Let me just sum up this game as open. Devil worship you have to collect five on pentagram to sacrifice them to obtain a devil skin for the goat. I'm shocked this game exists and i'd rather destroy it than let someone else have access to it now. I was naturally suspicious. That this may have been a troll but if it's a troll it is a very committed one because they looked at this amazon account and they have reviewed a rash of other products. Just a very neutral serious straight ahead review of like lightbulbs and basket and trail mix. I think this is legitimately an evangelical mom who was horrified by what she called the this game satanic content. Wow yeah wow i. I was amazed. Now i've got another Negative review here with a zero zero. This is from march. Twenty one twenty eight on metacritic and it says playing goat simulator is like watching a washed up. Comedian laugh at their own jokes and to that. I say it's like being on the podcast. I as the world becomes increasingly uncomfortable. We need all the comfort we can get and when it comes to comfort you can always count on. Purple purple is comfort. Reinvented only purple. Has the grid a stretchy joe material. That's amazingly supportive for your backs and legs while cushioning your shoulders necks and hips. Because of how it's designed the grid doesn't trap air. Air actually circulates and flows through it. So you'll never overheat. The grid bounces back as you move and shift unlike memory. Foam which remembers everything. That's why memory foam has craters david's right now. You can try your purple mattress rookie. Free with free. Shipping and returns financing is available to you know get to mess around with a sample of the grid material from purple feels great. What a better indifferent sleep experience. I would have it with the full thing instead of just a small coaster sized sample. But even that. I was like hey why not commit to purchasing a mattress based off of this purple really is comfort for an uncomfortable world. Right now you'll get ten percents off. Any order of two hundred dollars or more go to purple dot com slash played. Ten and use promo code played ten. That's purple dot com slash played. Ted promo code played ten for ten percents off. Any order of two hundred dollars or more per will not come slash played. Ten promo code played ten terms apply. Hey i got a segment segment. It's it's time for the first. thank you after. It's time for the first and probably only edition of goat goat. that's goat. at here's how this will work. I will name a video game and rosh heather and matt you can buzzing with a goat noise of your choice and all you have to do is answer. Yes if it has a goat or no if the game has no goat and the winner will be crowned goat. Greatest of all time or gatt goat goat. Wow we understand the rules. So i like goats sound and then i tell you go in the game or no vote in the game all named the game and then yes. That's exactly the process right. Okay here we go okay. Let's get into it first up. We were just talking about this. Game started valley matt. I'm gonna. I'm gonna say i'm going to guess that there is a go in that game. There are goats valley. say one point for matt. Wow all right. Moving on to a big franchise and a big game. Within that franchise the legend of zelda the carine of time rosh with slurp. There's there's no golden that game you are correct. No in in the legend of zelda the author of time there are goats and other zelda games but not that one all right raj has one matt has one heather's yet to get on the board next question or next game animal crossing back matt i there are there absolutely goats net game. There are goats in the first animal crossing. Yeah they are villagers next up animal crossing wild world. Oh this is a trick. Animal crossing wild world bad. And i'm going to say no goats animal crossing wild world. There are still goats in wild world but they removed all but two of the goat villagers huge number of cuts to the goat roster for some unexplained reason. Wow maybe it's because of the panic. Imagery i if you read the animal crossing wicky their their tone about this decision is like apoplectic there like. There's no defense for this week right. Mad has russia's one hundred zero a game five donkey kong tropical freeze heather. I'm going to say yes. Goat no coat in tropical marine. There was a goat enemy in concept arch but did not appear in the final game. Wow research for this segment dealer. For some reason. This was a full day all right next next game number. Six spiro year of the dragon bat matt. i think there's go to net game. There are multiple goats game interest in spyro to spyro three year of the dragon. There're a bunch of friendly mountain goats. This is horse shit bullshit that this is happening my podcast. I'm gonna go. You still got. You still got a chance to get on the board and in fact take the lead if you get the sweep the remaining questions all right next up bible adventures ben. Yeah other yes. There is no goten by benjamin despite there being a noah's ark section of this game where you collect about three dozen animals. None of them is a goat no goat. Wow all right. Three three three games left. I'm gonna. I'm gonna stop the number eight daisy daisy. That met i. I'm guessing there is because of the tie in with goat simulator. So yes you are correct. I probably tip that earlier. Matt you have four points now right to left staying in the survival horror world resident evil. Four sir roger. I'm going to say yes. Yes there is yeah right. There is a goat ornament. That is a key item within this game so yes. Technically goat has a presence. All right last one. Michael jordan chaos in the windy city heather. Yes i am going to give you a point for this. One does not feature a goat the annual but does feature the nba goat. Michael jordan himself. Us come on. That was good. I do think back. I give that point back. Matt apodaca congrats. You are today's goat goats about that. Hey you know you're game goats king it's time for the question block all right this runs from at anchovy piss on twitter and day right christ username i thought i could say say fast and move on but it does. It does pack a punch at the yes. It took us. Yeah so they right. Do you think this speaks to human desire to become other animals if even for a few hours in a video game and if so what animal would you want to play a simulation as for me bug so i can sting stuff and lay fat eggs. Good wow this is a nightmare bug eggs detail more disgusting than the last yeah sorry. Hov pick up but come on. I guess the the first part of the question like do people wanna be animals. I feel like everyone kind of sometimes. It's like what would it be like to be a lizard or something. I don't know that's natural okay. So what is your animal that you'd want to be in a game. What i wanna be. I mean how. The gift of flight is such a miracle to be a a bird of prey and soar above You know the the forest have little rodents down there. You can swoop in and kill. I don't know. I feel like being being a like. A hawk would be amazing. I would love to be a hawk in a game. Okay eagle. I'll go with hot because that sounds less. Jingoistic okay You know what i haven't seen is a snake simulator not snake game but snakes simulator were wiggling around and you gotta like by people's ankles and stuff like how cool would it be to make like a game where you had to sneak not a solid snake but as a regular snake into somebody's house without disturbing them and then bite their ankles in their sleep. That's that's what i want a snake simulator. What's fun about that. Is that you got room for different types of snakes. You could be a venomous snake. You know and you could be killing people. You could like a cobra rattler something you could also be a you know a harmless snake and you're just scaring people that's one way to go at and also you could be a big old anaconda or something. Yeah and be constricting people a lot of fun a lot of fun to be had with a snake simulator. Love that answer russia. Have you ever thought about being a particular animal. And if so what would you like to see reflected in a video game of that sort. I don't know but what an would want to be. But is there such things allies simulator out there teach you teach kids how to not get lice right. Yeah so you could be educational. Wow they're they're the i remember. There was a there was a tooth brushing game guy. I can't remember what the hell was messing around with that on like a computer at school back in the day it was like trying to teach teach dental hygiene. It was a similar sort of thing. Yeah some sort of 'edu-tainment feels like i. I'm surprised they didn't. I didn't experience that as a kid. There was a scare at my preschool. I remember that you started it right. You called it in. Yeah i wanna get out of nap time. I you got animal. You'd like to be in a game. I keep thinking about like because we've played a couple of your where he played man eater. We played played A couple of other games where you get to be an animal and the only thing that this is a bad answer. But i want to be like a planet of the apes monkey like in the newer movies. I wanna be like a monkey. Who who has the mobility and skills of a monkey. The thoughts of a man. And i think that would be. That'd be great. That sounds amazing. Yeah they didn't they didn't make a planet of the apes video game they did. It was sort of like. I didn't play it. I re watched the newer ones recently. And they're they're great. But i looked up that there is a game for it but it wasn't like i wanna triple a. Like shadows of more door planet of the iraqi style game. That'd be so fun. What an amazing franchise that that. Modern apes franchises so like all. Those movies are good It doesn't seem like they should be. It doesn't seem like the planet of the prequel should be good. And the whole trilogy is like really compelling and like one of the best trilogies of our time i else on record their incredible what the podcast is about. But boy do i love those. Hit us up on twitter and instagram. With your weird questions from your insane username. I can't play pod or email. Get pot jiman- voicemail at six one. Six played that six thousand six two seven five two nine three three. Our music engineering is by devin bryant. You can follow him on twitter at baffled. Gab 's our guest has been the great rauscher maya rosh and absolute treat and honor to talk with you. Thank you so much for giving us some of your valuable time. Anything you would like to plug or let people know about at this point It's the album album came out. December called spicy beets Hit number two tunes and number fifteen on billboard and for just a week but it was good enough and so anyway the record label at montreal hopeful tragedy records. has been great. They've been helping me out with a lot of great things and you can get the album. Just go to my website or hopeful tragedy records or itunes and it's just called roger maya's by superbeets at check that out. Yeah matt what's next week's game next week's game. Td goodbye everyone. Goodbye bucket edge.

Heather anne campbell kevin pankin japan heather Casey wilson w nick matt oppa daca jean park tokyo tony hawk schenn mutu talion nassar nikki lennox noah tony hawkes valhalla mowlem youtube
Three Billy Goats Gruff

Tales

39:18 min | 9 months ago

Three Billy Goats Gruff

"Details on this podcast are dark, sometimes scary and full of adult themes as a warning. The original story of three billy goats growth features, violence and death please exercise caution for children under thirteen. The sound of bleeding goats echoed through the creek bed and Eric's is shot open. He knew the sound as soon as it hit his ears it was unmistakable. A were here. The troll sat up and held his aching head in his hand. He was too hung over to deal with the billy goats today. The Berry wine was the only thing he'd had in his enormous belly in days he was starving. Maybe. I could grab a fish from the creek before they get here. He Thought Eric grabbed his club and used it as a crutch to push off the ground. The Sandy Bank under the bridge wasn't nearly as comfortable as his old bed, but it was the best he could do these days. He stepped out of the shadow of the wooden bridge and into the scorching Saen it didn't help his hangover. Eric leaned over the creek and splashed his face. There wasn't a fish in site. The only thing he could see was his own unmistakable reflection staring back at him. It was the first time he'd bothered to look at himself in months. He couldn't stand his ugly mug his gnarled nose went three directions at once his forehead protruded from his brow. His eyes were big as saucers and set way too close together. The little hair he had was stringy and grey I'm as ugly as they say I am. Eric was disgusted by himself. His entire being was defined by the ridicule he'd faced from the goats bay hated the trolls call them ugly stupid and lazy when Eric's home was burned down no one shed a tear. The goats cheered. He'd been living under this bridge ever since the bleating was getting closer eric quickly washed his mouth out with water and spit back into the creek. He grabbed his club and retreated to the safety of the bridge overhang. He could hear their footsteps he closed his eyes and prayed they would pass by. But they didn't they were here once again coming for his home Eric gripped his club tight. He didn't like it but he would have to be the troll of goat nightmares evil and mean, he lowered his voice and growled. TRIP TRAP TRIP TRAP WHO's act tripping on my bridge? I'm Vanessa. Richardson. You're listening to tales apart cast original every Wednesday we dive into the dark origins of another fairy tale. You can find all episodes of tales and all other podcast originals for free on spotify or wherever you listen to podcasts to stream tales for free on spotify just open the APP and type tales in the search bar. Today's were telling the classic tale of three billy goats gruff the story of three goats trying to find food and the troll that stands in their way. Coming up, we'll discuss the origins of this tale. Three Billy. Goat gruff was first printed around eighteen forty one in a collection of folktales compiled by Norwegians pedder Kristen as Bjornson and Y- organ engebretsen. Mo- at the time Norway was a split, Kingdom with Sweden the two countries shared a governing body and it was an amicable existence but the Norwegian population was looking for anything that might make them stand out from the Swedes, and national pride became a point of emphasis throughout the nineteenth. Century. As Bjornson and mow were childhood friends from Southern Norway inspired by the success of the brothers Grimm they wanted to do their own collection of Norwegian Tales. The two friends hoped that their work would inspire the same kind of national pride in Norway that the GRIMM's had in Germany. Despite not having a cover page, a table of contents or even the benefit of reviews as Bjornson and mows collection tapped into that Norwegian. And was a huge success upon its debut with it's simple style, memorable setup and repetitive structure three billy goat gruff became the breakout tale of Norwegian folktales and gave modern audiences. The I look at a uniquely Scandinavian crip did the troll. Eric watched his house burned down in the night. It wasn't the first time such. A thing happened trolls were used to being the object of scorn. It was always the trolls fault. It wasn't the adorable if mischievous fairies or the terrifying giants of the north, it was certainly never the goats fault know when things went wrong eric knew he would be the one to blame. Trolls were always made to bear the brunt of human scorn and eight feet Tall Eric made for an easy target. But it wasn't his fault it was the greedy goats day and night they had roamed through the fields and the forest eating. Every single thing they could reach, and with the way they climbed that was pretty much everything and so of course, there was a famine. But the goats didn't take any of the blame for the lands destruction. Instead, the humans just heaped corn on Eric. He was the ugly troll they blamed him for cursing the village. Frederick Gruff and his sons Ludvig and Johan were the biggest nastiest of all. The billy goats the father had made Eric's life hell. Since he had moved to this town, Frederick was twice the size of any other goat closer to a small bison. He had come from the North Sea and torn through the countryside wrecking entire mountains and consuming whole valley's all in an effort to fill his ceaselessly expanding belly in his is all of Norway's food was the graphs destiny. The troll had tried to stay out of the graphs way and mind his own business. He had heard Frederick had killed a troll a few towns over Eric didn't know if that was just gossip or not what he did his best to keep a low profile regardless, it was a futile effort. The graphs were constantly antagonizing him. They weren't quiet about their intentions to run eric out of his own town or worse and tonight they pulled it off Eric didn't have any proof but he knew it was the graphs that burned down his house. He wanted to use his massive hands to tear them limb from limb roast their bodies over his burning home. Dots what they expect you to do they want you to act like a monster Eric pushed the thought of revenge from his mind. He was too meek and he knew that if he reacted, they'd put together a mob and kill him Frederick Gruff was just waiting for a reason as Eric's house burned. He turned to see the three goats arriving on the road next to him shame about your house Frederick said to Eric then he turned to his boys. The idiot must have fallen asleep with his pipe again, he murmured to them just loud enough for Eric to hear Eric gave the billy go to passing look but didn't dare stare there was no sense in putting up a fight. Eric. Would just have to find a new home. Eric gave one last glance toward the burning hull of his house and headed down the road into the night. Perhaps. I can make it to iota and Hyman. He thought as he stared up at the clear night sky. It wasn't true that trolls couldn't be out during the daytime. That was just another vicious rumor that floated around. But Eric Did love walking at night he he didn't care if it was stereotypical of his kind the night suited him. He tried not to look out into the fields as he walked by it would make him more depressed. They used to be filled with wheat and cabbage vegetation as far as the I could see. Now it was just scavenging billy goats. He could see them moving through the night they combed through the refuse clearing out whatever scraps were left over get out of here you filthy troll. Johan shouted again, he was right on Eric's heels leading a mob of goats chasing him out of town but Eric was glad to go. He never wanted to see Johann or any of the other groff's ever again. Eric new traveling at night wasn't safe for most but at eight feet tall and six hundred pounds, he had a distinct size advantage unless he ran into a bear or a wandering giant, he would be safe. Erik walked through the night without stopping. He was exhausted and hungry the sun peaked across the mountain filling the valley with Golden. Light? Eric stopped in his tracks, his pack fell off his shoulder he couldn't believe his eyes. It was a lush green valley untouched by giant or goat tall pine trees along the road blocked a steep drop off to a peaceful creek below blackberry bushes filled the far hillside across from him. The billy goats must not know about this place Eric set out loud. It was the only way he could justify how such a beautiful place was left in such pristine condition. Eric looks down the hillside to the creek below it was too steep to walk, but he could slide. Eric dropped to his rather large rump and slid all the way to the bottom. He hit the riverbank with a Thud Eric couldn't help. But laugh as he looked up, there was an abandoned bridge over the creek covered in weeds. This would make a perfect place to set up camp. Eric Thought. He had fresh water and all the blackberries he could eat. Eric crossed the bridge and trudged up the hill toward the berries. He grabbed a handful from the brush and pop them in his mouth. They were more tart than he was expecting. They wouldn't be as good for eating as he hoped, but I bet they'll make a great wine. Eric. Thought as he loaded up his shirt tail with the berries. For the next few days, Eric ventured out to try to find a town to move to. But each time he entered a new village, he was met with the same hate and scorn not only that but it seemed as though the gold said eaten their way through every open field and mountainside there wasn't any food anywhere. After. A couple of weeks eric gave up trying to find a new home. Instead he took up permanent residence under the bridge at least it was safe. But. One Morning Eric woke to the sound of leading and from underneath his bridge, he could hear the Boards Creek with the weight of hubs. He knew that southbound he knew that smell it was a goat. Eric. Didn't want any trouble, but he couldn't run from the billy goats. Any longer he tried to be a bigger man when they showed up at his village he was polite and peaceful, and they still down his house the time for civility was over. If Eric wanted to defend his new home, he'd have to face this goat. Eric knew if this one went across, the others would follow, it would never be just one soon enough all of his berries would be gone. They weren't much but they were the only thing he had the goat was almost halfway across Eric gripped his club and put on his meanest nastiest troll face his heart raced the Meek Eric was finally going to be the worst kind of troll. He would have to scare this goat off his land shakily he shouted trip trap trip trap who's that tripping on my bridge the walking stopped Eric led a small grins slip out as he sprung from underneath the bridge. In, one quick motion he jumped from the creek bed to the bridge he landed on the wood planks and raise the club high above his head giving the meanest nastiest shout he could. But his growl slowly faded out his saucer-sized is grew to the size of serving dishes. It wasn't just any goat that was standing in front of him. It was Johann Gruff. Coming Up Eric Confronts the goat that down his home? Hey listeners, I wanna take a quick moment to introduce you to the newest parkhouse original on the block. It's called incredible feats and it's a short weekday show hosted by comedian Dan Cummins every weekday Dan shares a true account of physical strength mental focus or genuine bizarre behavior going behind the scenes and into the achievements of World Class Act. Like Dean Carnasciali's who once ran for nearly eighty one hours without stopping and performance artists like lucky diamond rich who boasts Tattoos in the most unlikely places and even everyday people thrown into extraordinary circumstances like Juliana Koepka who was forced to survive alone rainforest for eleven days incredible feats is offbeat entertainment that sometimes weird sometimes wonderful and always surprising new episodes air daily Monday through Friday search incredible feats and follow free on spotify or wherever you get your podcast. This episode of tales is brought to you by simply safe if you've been looking for home security but don't want to be bogged down by contracts, outrageous monthly fees or waiting around for technicians to come to your house, I have the solution it's simply safe simply safe was designed to be easy to use. So protecting your whole home twenty, four seven has never been simpler. You can order online with the click of a button once it arrives just open the box, placed the sensors and plug it in. Now, your home is protected around the clock. Simply safe isn't kidding when they say set up as easy clear and precise step by step instructions allowed me to have my new home security system up and running in no time for only fifty cents a day I get there twenty, four, seven, professional monitoring an emergency dispatch. It's a fair and honest price for what US News and World Report called. Best. Overall Home Security of twenty twenty head to simplisafe dot com slash tales and get a free hd camera that simplisafe dot com slash tales to make sure they know that our shows sent you. Now back to our story. After his house burned down and he was chased from his village Eric settled into a safe life living underneath a bridge drinking berry wine every night. But his peaceful existence came to a sudden halt when the goat that burned down his home Johan Graf tried to cross his bridge. Johan jumped back and screamed both the troll and the goat were caught off guard Eric's blood race through his body. His breaths were deep. He no longer had to pretend to be angry he was angry seeing the face of the goat, the terrorized him had sent him into a rage. Eric had to scare the goat away. So he raised his club high above his head and smacked it against the bridge as loudly as he could. The sound roll down the valley and back again, scaring every living thing for miles. But most importantly, it scared Johan graph. The billy goat inched backwards. Eric. Had never seen one of the gruff boys afraid before catching him off guard was really working in his favor trip trap trip trap. Where do you think you're going gruff? Eric snarled out as he stood straight up his eight foot frame cast a shadow over the smallest gruff for the first time in his life. He was proudly the monster they made him out to be. Eric pointed his club directly at Johann and the billy goat stumbled backwards the troll quickly scanned the hillside and the road for Ludvig Frederik they were nowhere to be found Johann was all alone speak go. Eric inch toward Johan. The goat stammered out I was just going over. Eric Swung. The club down again, inches from the goats face Johan flinched you're just going to eat my berry's hit wasn't enough that you burned down my house eric shouted spittle flying from his mouth. Johansen is went wide. He looked side to side Eric knew he had the billy goat trapped? There was nowhere to go Johan shook his head that that wasn't me. I'm sorry I gave you such a hard time but I'm starving Eric held the club out to the side completely blocking off the bridge he leaned down toward Johan putting his face directly in front of the goats. The berries aren't good for much more than making wine so I'm pretty hungry to. Maybe I'll just each year you off Johan cried out, please no, we're completely out of food dinner. There's nothing left in the village Eric stared at the goat surprised at his groveling. This wasn't the same bully that chased him out of town Johan looked broken his voice was low his ribs stuck out from under his skin. Johann was telling the Truth Johan Begged Eric. Don't eat me I know I treated you badly but I'm sorry, look. At me I'm no meal. They've kept what little food we have from me I just want something in my stomach before I die the smallest growth shook as he spoke, he wasn't the main hateful Johann of old. My brother will be down the road soon eat him instead he said he was desperate. Eric couldn't help but feel like he was the bully now he knew what it was like to starve. He lowered his club and stepped aside. Just a small amount then you must be off Johan cried out with joy. He thanked Erica dozen times for having mercy on him. He promised he would need to many of the berries as he scampered past the troll. As the smallest gruff ran into the bushes on the Hillside Eric called out once more just a small amount. He hoped the goat would heed his warning. Eric climbed down from the bridge and retreated to the comfort of the shade. He pulled his bottle of wine out and took a drink to calm his nerves. His hands were still shaking from his confrontation with Johann. He never dreamed the time would come when he would have pity on one of the graphs but the emaciated Johan laid bare the reality of the situation there was no more food. The billy goats had finally eaten everything Eric should've known eventually they'd end up at his bridge, their greed made it inevitable eric took another drink of wine and laid his head back on the soft sand of the bank before he confronted Ludvig, he wanted a moment of rest. After some time the bridge above him creaked at Eric's is instinctively shot open holds it was another goat. Steps were heavier this time the gate slower they were already at the middle of the bridge ludvig. Eric grabbed his club and leapt across the creek the sound of the water covering up his movement he climbed onto the bridge as quietly as he could. Eric looked up walking across his bridge was the second of Frederick. Sons. Eric raised his club and shouted trip crop trip trap water you doing tripping on my bridge, the billy goats stopped in his tracks and slowly turned around Eric's stood tall his club raised high in his hand. He puffed his chest out trying to appear threatening. LUDVIG didn't move. He just stared back slowly a smile crapped across his face. Ludvig through his head back and laughed he or bridge to you live under a bridge. Now, Ho that is rich. Eric was confused and disheartened. Why wasn't Ludvig intimidated his brother had been. Eric's blood boiled. He couldn't bluff his way through this one. He realized he'd have to attack the troll pulled his club back and charged the elder gruff with fury in one swift motion. He cracked the goat right across his face Ludvig went down quickly Eric stepped over top of the graph the goat wasn't laughing now he was bleeding. Eric sneered. Are you hungry to there's no free meal hair ludvig tried to get back to his feet the shot to the headed knocked him for a loop finally standing the goat wobbled back and forth but his eyes glazed over. Eric never liked resorting to violence but after years of the GROFF's torment, it felt well-deserved. Your brother was too skinny to eat. He said. But that doesn't seem to be a problem with you I bet I could live for a week on your fact Ludvig blinked back tears his voice was low as he spoke to Eric please don't eat me I'll I'll tell you a secret if you let me go. Eric Snapped I. Think I'll just eat you. He raised his club into the air but just as Eric began licking his lips ludvig shouted I know who burn down Your House Eric. Froze the club inches from LUDVIG head it was my father Ludvig said he's on his way here. We heard there might be food down in this valley we didn't know you lived here. He'll be here soon. Eat Him have your revenge Eric yearned to swing anyway but couldn't do it. LUDVIG was defenseless. Eric. Couldn't kill him in cold blood. It's Frederick. You want not ludd vague he reasoned. Eric stepped aside and nodded toward the hill with the berries go just a small amount. Your brother is up there now ludvig exhaled a sigh of relief and slunk around Eric his head toward the ground. But then Ludvig stopped at the end of the bridge and turned back. He's a monster. He said our father, a bigot and a murderer I'm sorry then he climbed up toward the berries. Eric dropped down and sat on the edge of the bridge Frederick Gruff had burned down his house, and now he was coming here to his new home. Frederick. Wasn't a follower like his kids he wouldn't back down to intimidation or threats. He was the leader of all the billy goats the one who destroyed Norway all on his own. and. He was coming to Eric's home. Eric was going to be in for a fight. Coming up arrogant Frederick come face to face now back to the story. After facing off with the to gruff kids Johan Ludvig Eric decided to have mercy on them both he let them pass over his bridge and enjoy his berries but their father Frederick Gruff would be coming by next and new father gruff wouldn't easily backed down. Eric Sat on the bridge watching the Mid Day Sun dance off the water below while it wasn't nearly as comfortable or as convenient as his life in the village he had more than most in this world he had fresh water shade, the occasional fish plus all the berry wine he could drink. He wished things were different that he and the goats could share the land but he knew sharing and conservation weren't really in their nature. The goats were pure consumers they were greedy to their very core. The thought flashed through Eric's mind. Maybe, I should just give them the hillside. He didn't know if the rumors that Frederick had killed a troll were true. But if he was capable of burning down Eric's house, he was probably capable of murder and was it worth dying over some berries but eric could hear Ludvig and Johann chomping their way through his berry patch eating more than they should. He should have known that they weren't going to listen to him. They only listen to their old man. There was nowhere else for Eric to go. He had to stand his ground and fight the patriarch off. Eric jumped off the bridge splashing into the water below he rinsed his Weinstein Lips and washed his face. The cool water provided a nice relief from the hot summer. Sun. If this was going to be Eric's last day on this earth, he wanted to look his best. After soaking in the creek for a few minutes, the troll dragged himself out of the water and back toward the bank, he took another swig of wine and waited under the bridge. But. Soon, the sun sank lower and lower and the day quickly faded away maybe ludvig lied. Eric thought maybe the biggest of the billy goat gruff wasn't coming at all. But just then a deep loud cry echoed across the hills he heard trees grown and would crack under heavy. Hugs. It could only mean one thing Frederick Gruff was near. Eric took his last sip of wine and sat the bottle down. He closed his eyes and cradle the club in his hand it was almost time. A? Gold Hope pressed on the boards above him they sagged down under the massive weight when Frederick neared Eric raised the club above him and banged against the bottom of the bridge three times. The footsteps stopped he took a deep breath and boomed out. TRIP TRAP trip trap. WHO's that tripping on by bridge? The goat took another step. Frederick scoffed. WHO's asking? The entire bridge strained to hold up the giant billy goat. Eric crept out from underneath the bridge and leapt from the bank high into the air. He crashed down onto the end of the bridge, his club hanging down by his hip he leveled his gaze at Frederick. Gruff. Billy goat repaired back and stomped his hooves against the bridge. The rest of the country might have been starving but the eldest gruff had clearly not missed a meal. He looked bigger and stronger than ever his shoulders like boulders, his jagged horns like spears from his head. But Eric didn't budge. He pulled the club to the middle of his body and held it in both hands. The troll wasn't afraid. You destroyed this whole country he said. Consumed everything out of sheer greed, you're not going to cross this bridge Frederick laughed and glared back at Eric. I, thought I was rid of you and I burned your house down troll fredericks voice was deep and scratchy like the bottom of a dried. Well, he his hove's against the would as if he was about to charge. Eric, didn't budge the to stared each other down neither one flinching. Eric could see the fire rise up in Frederick's is, but he wouldn't back down. Frederick charged forward. Eric Swung his club with all his strength cracking the mighty Gruff Square in the jaw Frederick stumbled backward. He didn't lose his balance, but his horn was splintered. It looked like a pitchfork emerging from his brain blood trickle down from his forehead. Eric, roared and continued the attack. He wasn't going to wait around for Frederick this time he swung the club around again but the goat duct just below his wild swing Eric had missed his follow through sent him tumbling off the edge he managed to grab the bridge and pull his body back up but Frederick stabbed him again this time sticking his broken horn into the side of the trolls head. The pain shot straight through Eric's body. The goat had taken out his eye blood spill down his face as he tried to get to his feet. With his good I saw Frederick, charge forward ready for one final deathblow. Eric reached for his club, but it was too far. He couldn't stop Frederick nothing would stand in the goats way. Suddenly an idea popped into Eric's head and he jumped upright absorbing the full brunt of the goat's horns with his chest. It felt like all of Eric's insides exploded all the air left his body at once blood pooled in his mouth fredericks momentum pushed them backward to the edge. Of the bridge with his last outs of strength Eric wrapped both arms around fredericks horns he held on for dear life as he leaned backward off the bridge, the goat and the troll fell off the edge crashing down toward the creek below it sounded like an avalanche has the to shot through the shallow water and into the creek bed neither moved Eric knew he wasn't long for this world. From his one good eye. He saw Frederick groff jerk to life bleeding and broken. He was missing one horn completely. He was still alive Frederick climbed out of the water. He dragged himself up the bank toward the hill with his last bid of life. Eric called out to him just a small amount of the Berries Gruff Frederick looked back down toward the dying troll. All eat as much as i. want your blackberries are Meyde. Norway is the graphs destiny. The billy goat inched his way back up the hill. Eric, leaned his head back into the cool water and smiled, he figured the graphs were going to do just that if he had another breath in his body, he might warn them that they weren't blackberries after all day were elder berries and elderberry are poisonous to goats. If they just a small amount, they'd probably be fine but the graphs had proven they weren't capable of restraint. Eric closed his eyes and let the stream wash him away. Norway would be eaten. No more. Three billy goats gruff introduced the world to the concept of the troll. It wasn't a widely known mythical creature before as Bjornson and most collection of fairy tales. But after Englishman George Webb. Descent translated the volume in eighteen, fifty, nine, their popularity took off throughout Great Britain and the Western world. The Scandinavian troll was so influential over British literature that they provided the basis for the version found in the works of J R toll game the moral of three billy goat gruff has always. been pretty straightforward don't be greedy, but there might be more to the message given the time period in which the tail first appeared. The goats of the original tale are uniformly portrayed as good seeking food that they see as their right standing in their way is an ugly stupid violent troll a simple example of the other someone who isn't like the goats. The troll doesn't do anything other than impede their path forward, and because he does the audience is supposed to see his death as. Wide Crossing the bridge for the goats was a simple matter of manifest destiny and inevitability and no savage troll was going to stand in their way. The British of the mid nineteenth century were at the height of their reign as global colonizers who didn't hesitate to plow right through any one day viewed as other standing in their way. But with more context, the troll doesn't seem so bad. He's not savage at all just someone trying to stand up against a devastating and conquering force the message of the story very well might be don't be greedy, but it might not have been the troll that was the greedy one. Thanks for listening to tales. We'll be back next Wednesday with a new episode. You can find more episodes of tales and all other podcast originals for free on spotify not only spotify already have all of your favorite music but now spotify. An easy for you to enjoy all of your favorite podcast originals like tails for free from your phone desktop or smart speaker to stream tails on spotify just open the APP tap browse and type tales in the search bar. Join me next week for another dark and surprising fairytale. Tales was created by Max Cutler and his podcast studios. Original executive producers include Max Ron, cutler sound designed by Kerry Murphy with production assistance by Ron, Shapiro, Carly Madden, and Joshua Kern. This episode of Times was written by Jesse Harris with writing assistance by Greg. Castro. I'm Vanessa Richardson. Hey podcasters don't forget to check out the brand new spotify original from podcast incredible feats join hosts Dan Cummins as he explores true accounts of weird wonderful and all out wild achievements new episodes premiered daily Monday through Friday search, incredible feats, and follow free on spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.

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