23 Burst results for "Dr Judy"

"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

Dr. Judy WTF

02:00 min | Last month

"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

"Because why? Because first of all were better often yield stay second of all we are better parents we are bad better partners we are better. Community people. So the point is is if we continue to. Do the wealth of Freud. Which I'll get into the repetitive pattern, which is why call the show Dr Judy W, what the void 'cause we keep repeating things and we're gonNA keep repeating things until we. Make the unconscious conscious and process. The feelings have been buried inside of us or projected onto other people. So. Panel one childhood wounds neglect smothering, controlling verbal abuse sexual abuse. Forms of for of odds of use in this case, the another form of Abuse Ob- obviously as if your parents are alchoholic drug abusers. So what do we do with parents like this? What kind of ambivalent feelings show up I think many but mainly are we obligated to honor these people? So here's. An interesting point of view. The Asia Rabbi says we all hope to have parents who are loving. Caring understanding patient but unfortunately, reality is that some parents are irrational abusive manipulative, intimidating leaving deep emotional scars that may not heal four a lifetime. In, an abusive situation does that obligate us to still honor our parents? So he goes on a little deeper than I wanNA get into the show, but he goes to the source and talks about..

Dr Judy W
Interview With Former Deputy Director of the CDC Dr. Judy Monroe on COVID-19

Voice of San Diego

04:46 min | 3 months ago

Interview With Former Deputy Director of the CDC Dr. Judy Monroe on COVID-19

"Now by Dr Judy Monroe, former deputy director of the CDC, current president and CEO of the CDC Foundation. And an advisor to the pandemic Action Network, Dr Monroe. Thank you for taking some time to tell us about the work your organization is doing and to update us on the Corona virus outbreak happening across the US Let's begin with some background on the CDC Foundation. The work you d'oh why the organization was created and the difference between the foundation and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Sure So. The CDC Foundation is an independent nonprofit that was actually created by Congress to support the Centers for Disease Control. You know, the CDC is obviously a federal agency with scientists in public health experts that put out guidance to the United States to protect the health and then the foundation. Being an independent nonprofit. What we do is we unleash really the power public private partnerships. We bring philanthropy in private sector and individual support public health issues. We do this across a broad variety of programs now support CDC and their work and the field on we do that, with speed flexibility that government Ah is challenged by sometimes so we're able to get out really quick and do work that is really vital to the health of people. So when and how did the foundation begin getting involved in the response to the cova 19 pandemic? We activated our emergency Response fund in January, just a few days after the CDC activated their emergency operation Center, So we were the first actually in the country to have Ah Covad 19 Emergency Response fund. We started spreading the word going to our donors. Ah and asking people to. Ah begin to contribute because we were not an endowed foundation, so we need to raise the funds and we started. Turning to CDC for their needs, as well as out to the health department's been out in the field to see where that philanthropic support was needed. And we've had a long list of requests over the last several months that we've been able to step in and help with And I'm assuming this is an undertaking. Unlike anything the foundation is that to deal with before This is the largest. Now we have supported things like the Ebola epidemic in West Africa. Zika hurricane recovery, But I will tell you of pandemic. Of course, this is one of the you know the largest public health emergencies that any of us have seen. Ah, and it has has really been the largest emergency response in the history of the CDC Foundation. I'm joined by Dr Judy Monroe, former deputy director of the CDC and current president and CEO of the CDC Foundation. She's also an adviser to the Pandemic Action Network. What are some of the more specific ways the CDC foundations currently helping with the US response to the Corona virus outbreak? Yes. So early on, we ramps to help with personal protective equipment. All of us were really concerned about our front line health care workers and frontline public health workers. So we've done ah, across the country. We had been able to supply personal protective equipment. We're very concerned about the disparities on the vulnerable populations, and we've been able to answer the call. Ah, in the number of our city's rule communities, Onda big cities as well around some of the vulnerable populations that have been impacted greatly by this all the way from helping them with Basic needs a spokes have lost jobs, toe holding medications, those types of things we've done large communication efforts. Ah, Right now. We're really concerned about people wearing masks. That's ah. Kind of a current focus of hours to try to help the public realised that we can't really reopen the economy Folks aren't taking seriously. The precautions against spreading the virus and protecting themselves. And that's of course, the physical distancing in the mouth. Ah, we also are hiring staff. We've been ableto hire hundreds of staff. Help support health departments across the country with their needs, you know, basis all over the country. We're seeing these epicenters emerging, and that means more staff needs to be on the ground. Mental health is an area that we've helped with on then, even like data systems and laboratory as well as the much needed research, So we're really been ableto help in very broad ways.

Cdc Foundation CDC Dr Judy Monroe Pandemic Action Network President And Ceo United States Deputy Director Advisor Hurricane Cova Congress Ebola West Africa
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

05:52 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Significant other take turns doing. There's gotta be some kind of system and I love those ideas because it's really about. Yes, education is going. Going to be different right now, some of the kids are missing out on certain parts of their curriculum that obviously they would have gotten access to if they were in school in person with a regular schedule, but this is an awesome time to teach life skills. It's an awesome time to teach your kids different levels of responsibility. Half the older kits mentoring the younger kids have the older. Older kids, helping out with bigger portions of the household, all of those things and so I definitely don't want people to feel like. Oh, my Gosh! This is just going to be terrible. You're teaching your kids self starter skills. That's going to totally pay off in a few years, so it's not all bad guys. It's really not it's. Are you still? Are you still at Pepperdine Yeah? We're doing virtual for the fall two. So, what does that look like in college? Take me through that a little bit because I know a few girlfriends whose kids were supposed to start college in the fall and I know that gave me chills when I said that. Because you know I remember that and I remember you know what a right of passage that was like. Pack up your stop and go to college, and that was like your next. Level of freedom. What does this mean for these kids? You know I think it's going to be tough. Because people were so excited about going to university having that whole experience, and now they're not going to have it. People are angry. They want their money back on something that no one can control but I also understand all of that. Because a huge right of passage, the good thing is they're going to get it back. At some point I know it sucks to like not be able to be excited the same way that you probably were. When you were thinking about what your college, but look like, but kind of like you said you know, think creatively about how you can still create those experiences for yourself like half pods with a couple of your friends, who if you all agree to be safe and quarantining the same way that you guys can still have those social experiences where you can study together or you know? Walk the campus together even if you can't go into the classrooms. Bill those experiences for yourself that you can still feel like you're not missing out on everything right now. So is that. Do you know what the plan is for the school? You know the plant is changing every day, so we don't even have a specific plan other than we're going. Knock be on campus, so it is definitely going to be so interesting to see how this all out and some teachers are much less patient about online teaching, and they're allow happy about it. You know you feel about it. I feel okay about it I mean like i. like the in person interaction much more, but I'll do it. It's fine because have to, but I miss that interaction. So. person in having that energy, it was going to be just going to say it's different. Energy I know back in my days being scripted actress, you know there were like if they were casting something across the country, if I was in la and they were casting in New York. They want you to go on tape. I, know and I always hated. You probably got on tape for different jobs and. And TV shows and stuff. It's just different when you walk into a room. There's just an energy there that you cannot, you cannot repeat on tape. That doesn't mean you won't get a job by way. Of course you can, and your and your personality, and and all of that shines through, but there's just something about being live and I think for me in general, but for me, personally learning. I don't know if I could learn as effectively without that energy absolutely and I'm the same way, so you know. We gotta get this band Democratic Control Guy so that we can get that very important access to that part of socialization. All human beings need you know it's not. There's no replacement for us, so we got all band together and work towards that and just you know, be good. Good where your mass social distance. Let's get this country back in running. Do you think you'll travel anytime soon? Nope, Nope I'm going to be very careful. My husband's in the hospital every day, so already like recording team together, but always watching for symptoms like if something happens, and we're going to start basically staying apart and doing all those protocols knows all stay. Put What about you guys? So we so we're building this house. In Idaho, and so we have to go back to Idaho and a couple of weeks, and then we had had a weekend planned Kabo I. Don't know if we're definitely going yet or not. but the way we're going is. Easier to sanitize and I think we'll be okay but it's a very. It's strange I. Mean I I don't know the answer is I? Don't really know how I feel about it. Except we kind of have to go to Idaho, because I have to get this house going before the winter comes. Part of the reason I want to build. This house is because of covert. Yes, totally so you have another respite, you can go somewhere else and basically relaxed and be away right so yeah, I've never been interested in in like a vacation home or anything like that. But when I went to this place, it just felt like I. Don't know there was something about like the trees and Malay- and the clean crisp air, and just all of that. That appealed to me so much. Well I think it sounds amazing. It's just so good because it just changes your environment and we all need that sometimes for sure. What's your next book about? What are you writing about right now I'm writing a book about personality types and how to supercharge your life based on your personalities Oh my God. I love that what does me Oh my God I. Know I'm going to send you my personality tests so that you can take it. Okay, then that way we can talk about it more, but on my gosh I yeah I can't wait to tell you about I'm really excited about it, and it's like my creative project for now. But have there I. DO have to run because I have a one PM. Oh my Gosh I didn't even realize what time it is. Thank you so much for being here, Judy. You are phenomenal. Tell everyone how to find you on social media and. Get your book. Thank you so much I'm so glad I got to see today, so you can find me on social media and follow me at Dr Judy Ho and you can find my book wherever books are sold..

Idaho Dr Judy Ho la New York
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

08:40 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"This way. Or hard for them and I just wonder psychologically. What is all this doing to them? Yes? Children and teens this. For adult, it's like the one of the worst things that we've all been through as society and for Children Oh. My Gosh I mean. Can you imagine their young minds and just dealing with this level of stress, and also as such an important time for their self, concept, development and dealing with social skills and learning how to interact with people, they're not getting those usual touch points where they can like easily interact and learn and and forge relationships so although. It it's likely very difficult for them. I think the great thing about parents and teachers, and just other adults who obviously have positive influences on these children is being there to show them. What safety feels like because children are going to be feeling super stressed out like not knowing what to do next, but if they look at their parents and the people that they're with, and their parents are saying. Hey, we don't. Don't have it all figured out either, but don't worry. We got you like we're here for you. Let's talk it out whatever you need. It's okay I think just having that stable support of knowing that those adults are there for them is really in essence. The only ingredient that our kids and teens need right now is just knowing that they have that structure. I totally agree and you know I feel like. It's been very I. Mean it's been. It's been weird and cool and scary, an interesting to watch my kids through this because art, so my two oldest ones had just started driving. So they had been driving for what four months five months kind of on their own. And, so you remember that moment where you get your license y'all gone your like I'm need to pick up a pack of GUM, so I'm gonNA drive across town. For me was probably wanted to smoke a cigarette back then, too. But. It was all about that freedom, and so here I watch these kids have all this freedom, and then have it all ripped away from them, and and be back in the house, and so I saw the negatives of it, and I did also see the positives of it I. There were a few nights where you don't all for the kids and you know they're at odds with each other. Sometimes in the age spread his. You know funky although I did have to explain to them. That wants the youngest hits twenty one. They're all the same age so relaxed. But they had a lot of Nice bonding moments everything, but what I what I think about with them is like. Like their person to person interaction, and what they need as a developing young adult, yet is this doing? It was like I said for me. It's been great because I got to spend time with teenagers again were they were gone so for me? It's been awesome and actually is what I meant to say. When we went to Idaho, we came back, so that was so my husband and I. I tend to travel for work, not a ton, but we definitely are gone a couple of times a month for a couple of days, and we haven't been anywhere, so we went to Idaho for three days and they were texting me constantly calling constantly and when I got home, there was like even my sixteen year old daughter was on top of me holding hugging me like missed me aw! That story warms my heart so much because in some ways right now we're all basically experiencing more gratitude. Not, a given like your parents are just not a given like. You're lucky that they're there. You're lucky that they're healthy. You're lucky that they're able to take care of you. And you really get deeper sense of appreciation, which is amazing during like a teenage time where they're just like buck authority, screw this I. Don't WanNa hang out with. My parents were be seeing with them I've got my own life like it really makes them kind of reorganize their thinking about. About who is really your most important people in your life and I do that? That is one of the silver linings coming out of this like reevaluating, who is your interests are all totally it's very yes. You get rid of the edge, fringe people and all that kind of stuff, but back to like the especially the sixteen year old, so their boy girl twins in there for my son. The pro for him is that he's been able to focus on school. Better because it was like a little easier online and elite needing that social interaction them for my daughter. What I worry about her, is that she kind of needs to be forced into that, and so she's getting a pass to become Gore phobic. Basically, stay at home all the time and that I don't know just that whole that growing league teenager that that period of time where it feels like they're supposed to be learning. Learning all of these social skills and people skills. What is this going to do to them? You Know I. think that so much of it is. That are teenagers and our kids are going to be seeing themselves in a different light like they don't even know that they had this part of them or like Whoa like I'm actually much more introverted than I thought, and that's okay, you know. Obviously they all have very different. But I do think that at the end of covid pandemic. We're going to see that people are GonNa have to relearn some of these social skills like it's literally like going back out and be like this feel super weird, and I kind of forgot what it's like to be with people in person, and like what social etiquette they're gonNA bounce back. They'RE GONNA learn, but I definitely know that there's GonNa be a super awkward adjustment period for everybody including our children. I. Know I see that? Do. You think that because a lot of I think La County is saying they're not going to go back to school in the fall. My kids go to private school and they're saying they are going back. will in the fall. You know, but it's worrisome to me about the the lack of education for some of these kids because. I was reading. was as across the country that they can't keep track of WHO's actually logging into these virtual classrooms, and of course so many schools don't have the funding to give the kids, tablets or ipads or computers. It's just it's so worrisome. It's definitely worrisome and I think that's why right now even though it is exhausting for parents, you gotTA. Have to keep on top of it more than ever find some way to basically say hey. You know what you're supposed to be in school right now, but that's virtual or not, and obviously if the school is opening like calling them proactively. Cope Protocol. Like how are you to keep? Everybody say because there's so many people that are feeling lost and disorganized, and like things are just going to go amiss if you're not paying attention, and so it is important, even though parents are exhausted that they're kind of like front line right now for their kids like they've got to make sure that they got the stuff together yet and I think like going back to the commodores, doors and stuff like that. We have to have a plan because I think what happened. Was this turned on a dime? Quickly and I have to say the schools the to schools my kids go to. They did a very good job. And not just because it's a private school because you know I, have friends whose kids go to other private schools. They didn't do as good a job I? Just I got very lucky, and they both did a really great job getting the online thing. And really servicing the needs of the kids and the whole thing was very very impressive. some of the schools weren't as lucky especially like I was saying the underfunded schools, but we're July. So we have time right now to figure it out and I think that would be. The best thing is because we're talking about making lists and planning you know. What do you need to support your kid? Or how can you do it better? Because I know for me, I can't tutor. My kids know that stopped a long time ago and I got to. A point was like you know what I have to wage so many battles during the day with them on so many things. I just don't want to that to be one of them, yes. And I've been lucky enough to have someone to help me, and you know help tutor, and all that kind of back, but what I'm thinking is, there must be ways to use your resources like you know, have you heard of people that are quarantining in pods Yup so they might have so. Maybe you have two girlfriends or two couples that you're friends with whose kids are all? All around the same age, and if you're all quarantine in the same way, maybe you can group them together and take turns, or even within your household, you know, pay the older kids an allowance to to help the younger kids or you or your.

Idaho La County Gore Cope Protocol TA
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

04:54 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"And that's all taken away exactly and so now it has to be much more of a conscious effort. Whereas before I'm like okay well. I got this one hour commute I can call I three of my best friends, and I'll talk to the ball, and I was such a great friend because like Judy. In touch with everyone on my gap, I'm getting something out of it. So now it feels much more like it has to be conscious, and I have been doing kind of guilty like Oh man, like. Why haven't I called the more reach out more, but I think you have to give yourself the space to know what you need and I think because right now. Even though most of us are staying at home working at home. It might feel like you have all this extra time, but. But you don't. You have to manage everything else around the House people are with you twenty four seven. You GotTa Clean Your groceries when they get in i. mean there's just so many more things that were handling so i. think it's Ok to say well. I'll make ten minute call to my friend, and that might be if for the day, and that doesn't have to make me feel bad about not being connected. Connected because you know what you need, ask yourself what you need every day some days. You're going to want to talk to your friend for an hour other days. You're not and that's fine. I. Don't think everybody has to have it on the daily. Yeah, it's hard I. Agree with everything you're saying and I, but I also think to take it a step further. I think for me I. Don't feel like talking to. To people. Is that crazy? Oh, the same way, and that's why I've had to give myself the grace of hey, it's all right that you don't want to talk to people. Maybe you just WANNA. Do something on your own to recharge. You know and I think we all need that right now. Because more and more, so it feels like our spaces being crunched like if you're living with anybody else in the quarantine. It's like you don't have any time alone. You're. Only in the presence of other people in having talks does like sometimes it's okay just to go inward and I. Don't think there's anything wrong with an I'm feeling the way you feel like I want to talk to people a lot less than usual, which is so funny, but I think it's a it's again. kind of an expected reaction because every day is kind of very much. Just here's another day and we talked to. To somebody you're GONNA get the same updates, so it might kind of feel like it's a little bit of a groundhog day situation I think it's why people don't really like Kovic television programming, because it's like we don't WanNa. See all of you on zoom call because we're already doing at all I know. It's so concerning when you see that right. It's almost like that's why so many people are more revisiting their old. SITCOMS that they like watching. You know everything that was recorded comfort. It's comfort so so terry and I went to Idaho couple of weeks ago. And it was very last minute as it turns out, we're actually we just bought a lot. We're building a house which really excited about call, but what WH- The reason I'm bringing it up was because traveling was super weird. You know we'd masks, ones and sanitizing ever. Really diligent about the whole thing, but we went with our best friends, this other couple and so I, literally I haven't talked to her on the phone, maybe a random text here and there she's like one of my best best friends, but we three days together, and it was so fun to be with her and her husband for the. We laughed, so which we always do, but I don't know. I think having so little human contact other than the people in our house. It was just I mean. Mean I found that very joyful and I'm kind of hoping in a way just like you're talking about revisiting the old sitcoms and the comfort of Simpler Times easier times I'm wondering if if that's going to be a new thing like. Are we going to want to spend more intimate time with people? Are we GONNA have more dinner parties as opposed to going out places I. Just wonder what that means for us. I definitely feel like in some ways. It's almost like a reboot of how we social. Ships with people and I, totally know what you're saying. We did like a social distancing visit with a couple of my friends a little while back I mean we basically just sat outside. You know six feet apart whatever, but it was so lovely to like see people outside of your own home have a meaningful conversation and in some ways. Because of Kobe didn't like all the cleanliness issues like none of our phones right because it's just like their. Next to us, because we didn't want to touch things and touch, something else and why you know, so, it was like undivided attention and quality time and I, so enjoyed that visit and I want us to hopefully. Lesson for the future. Like what do we really want and what's going to nourish us right right totally, and I'll tell you my my one. One of my big concerns are the kids, but it's I. Mean I all I was gonna say especially by teenagers, so you know. My kids are sixteen, sixteen, Thirteen, nine and. It's been different for my nine year old versus the other three, because they're so savvy on social media, they they're kind of used to Indra..

Judy WanNa Kobe Kovic Idaho terry
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

07:03 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Hug your friends and hang out without fear, and you know that is going to be kind of a life that we're going to have to say goodbye to for a pretty good amount of time, so I think the the best thing to do is to acknowledge that it's normal to have these discouraging feelings. beat themselves up like why am I feeling this way? Why am I so down? Why do I get depressed? Will everybody's getting depressed right now? There's a new census study that says thirty five percent of people right now are feeling depressed anxious in a clinical. So you know, so you're not alone. It's very very common, so just give yourself that space. And then I think the good thing to know, though is that positive mindset and joy are things that you can build and Oh, I like that. How do we do that? Yes, so one thing I love. Doing is starting my day with a very quick gratitude. It doesn't even have to be so formal, but it's literally just like when you wake up just like. Doing the three good things exercise like what are three good things about today or like? What are three things? I'm thankful for and some days are going to be really small might be things. Like well I'm reading like. A jet today. That's fine. That's still significant and other days. You might have like bigger. You know items of gratitude, but I would suggest that you either say to yourself. Stay them to your loved one. That's in the bed with you or write them down in your journal. It's a great way to start the day on a positive mindset. I also encourage people to really cultivate joy by making a list, and then doing something not joyless every day I, think okay. What's a list? It's basically just like. Like what brings you that deep sense of gratitude gratification, where you're just like all like all is right with the world. When I'm doing desk, and they can be very little things for me I drink coffee every morning, and seriously. That's like on the top of my list I really look forward to having my coffee, but it could also just be like listening to a good soundtrack. It could be like re- watching a certain Sitcom you love. It could be gardening. Things like what really brings you joy, where basically when you're doing it, you kind of forget about time and space, and all your worries, so just make a list of like five or ten of these things and just committed doing one of them every day because research shows us that. It's not necessarily the negative events that are in our life. It's how many positive experiences that were also having that helps us to build resilience so create those positive moments for yourself every day and every minute counts. That's so funny, so sometimes art, so we took the kids to. You're up for Christmas new years right right after Christmas and. Ask My husband how the trip went versus. If you ask me how the trip went, you'd get very to like kind of different answers and he would tell you. It was because I I have like. Revisionist history I don't I don't ever. Vision is history. I'm very well aware, but you know when you take four kids on a trip like that I kind of what I assumed was there was going to be like some really great moments in some not so great moments, and that most of everything would live in between which is pretty much how it went. which is Great. But what I got out of it, and what I took away from, it was that there were like. S- three amazing moments during that trip and I'm not saying it was like epic like we're at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Dumb things, we took this tour at the Louvre and we had to break up in groups because it was a scavenger hunt, and my twins or sixteen really wanted nothing to do with it, and they hid from the laid, but it was so funny, and we had so much fun because it was so ridiculous, that will always remember when Max Nikki hit from the lady like moments like that that create those memories, and that's the joy that I took out of that trip, and it's not because I. don't remember that this one was Dushi on the train or that. That one was a pain in the ass when we went to wherever I remember those things too, but. In general. Those really joyful moments are what make me happy and the reason why you take trips like that absolutely I love that example because sometimes when you go on this remarkable trip were there was all these sites to be seen and things are very grand. What actually colors your memories the most? And what makes you reflect on it fondly are those like little fun moments that are totally spontaneous and seemingly tiny, but whenever you go back and think about them, it just brings you like sense of happiness, and I think we should all be encouraged that we all have those moments in our lives. No matter what's going on no matter how bad things are it's like just start laughing. Laughing like I. Watch this hilarious Youtube video earlier like I was just like. Oh, my Gosh! Like this is the highlight of my day so far it's just like laughing at this guy who's like making a fool of himself on youtube you know and those are the types of common things I'm saying. Add to your joyless and just make sure you stay in touch with them I agree and then I. Think also when it comes to all those happy moments. You don't have to photograph every moment. You don't have to document every moment you just have to live. It and I've become much much better at that as I've gotten older because again when I think about the last several months. I will not forget the. Stress. And I won't forget the worry and I won't forget you know that mcmurray. Feelings of depression one day, and then being okay the next day because I think that's been all part of the experience, but I will also take away those joy moments of singing with the kids in the kitchen till two am dance party, whatever it was those couple of like really fun team dinners. We had or those things, so you're saying is on. The daily doesn't have to be back, but we need to find. Things that make us joyous. Yes, make us joyous and bring that joy is internally cultivated things that we have control over so again right now with all the stress. What do I have control over? It will actually do have control over how I experience. Joy, so create those moments for yourself, and even what you just did right now. Heather like reflecting back on a nice memory. That's actually a great way to put something on. Your joyless is like. Let me just think about some positive things that. That happened in the last couple of weeks. That is something that you can go on your joyous to let me ask you this. Tell me if you experience this at all. Because you are in contact with people, because it's your job right, so you even during all this as opposed to just your immediate family that you're quarantining with you've been in contact other people I have found strangely, but I think a lot of people are going through because I'm curious to hear what you say about it. I've found that. Forget about social distancing like I don't even want to talk to people on the phone. Yeah I have been struggling with the same thing, and so it's interesting because I actually spent a lot of time talking to my friends before because I had so many commutes throughout Los Angeles exit right me too, and even like my mom and my aunt, who I would talk to all the time because like you, I'm in the car all the time,.

youtube Eiffel Tower Louvre Los Angeles mcmurray Heather Dushi Max Nikki
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

06:16 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Yeah, and I'm so glad you brought up that whole idea of like meeting schedule because you know both you and I, we work much better when they're structure right and now we're in this world where we kind of structure ourselves and it is different. You know before I knew I had to leave the house at eight am and I wouldn't be back til APN. It's like well. I gotta work out before then because I'm not going to work out after right. Now your home all day, so you could do later before you know. It's IPM and I'm really not the kind of person who works out at five. I just can't do it at that hour so. For me I just have to set the schedule for myself and basically every single day. Even if I don't have zoom meetings where I have to be face to face with somebody, I have the same schedule I. Have My morning routine where I get up. Do a little bit of journaling a little bit of reflect the reading, and by the way each of these things take less than five minutes from me, so it's not like I'm. I'm spending hours and hours doing this, but you know mindfully make my coffee all right my to do list and then I'll work out and after workout I take a shower and get dressed I know that everybody has been relishing in the fact that they can just wear their yoga pants all day, but that actually does impact our energy and our ability to save productive, so I was just percent eyesight. Get up and dressed like. Not Uncomfortable close certainly close where I would feel comfortable going out I. Put on a little bit of make-up's I. Feel like okay I'm here for something. I'm here for purpose, and that's the only way I've been able to make it through the pandemic, and so on the days, in which I have the biggest open space like if I've just set aside for writing my second book for example, that's the days where I have to force myself to do that routine. Routine most because, then it's so easy to be like well all day. Just rioting like I can just work out at twelve or one or five like so I. Force myself to get on that routine. No matter what and I do it seven days a week, and although that sounds like Whoa, that's a lot. You just feel so much better about yourself. Once you've gotten your body movie and like gotten into not routine. You know you're I agree with you hundred. One of the reasons. I got the Apple Watch I'm very motivated person. I don't need someone to tell me. The stand up every hour bought what I found was I was really great at the beginning I? was doing my exactly what you're saying like really doing my own routine, and even though I. Could I woke up early not as early as I usually did for school, but you know woke up early. Did the work at same as you get dressed? I don't usually wear when I'm not working. So that was kind of normal for me, but yeah, put on a pair of jeans and a t shirt and your hair back and look nice, and whatever, but I really like fell off the wagon with all that stuff, and so one of the reasons I got the watch and I'm not telling everyone to go buy an an Apple Watch. I'm just saying like. The And one of the resigned wanted you. Because we all have to go like this, okay. here we are. We been in this lockdown weird state of being for months. We don't know what's going to happen, but it could end tomorrow in two weeks and four months. We don't know and we all need like a reset. So what have we done well? What are we not doing well? And how do we get back on track and for me because I already do the lists. You and I are very much alike in that way. but for me getting the watch because the one thing that I start really like with self, sabotaging on is my health and my eating, and my working out, which is so not like me, but I really had to go. Okay, I'm self sabotaging here because I feel like I'm never going to have to wear like that dress again or do that again or you know. Do you know what I mean as I completely know what you mean? I think it's because the pandemic has caused us to feel like such a loss of control as well like you and I were a little bit like perfectionist. Egg, we're. Like you know we need to have things done a certain way. Get organized. It can be so stressful when you have no idea what direction anything's going to go in, and it makes you feel like you can't ahead so I think obviously what happens though. Is that the more you kind of start to fall into that pattern? Though the worst you feel it, 'cause like the more out of control. You feel so like you said it's about a reset. You don't have to wait 'til Monday. You don't wait till the. The. We just start today and be like. What can I do to get myself back on track and just know that whatever you can control personally. It's GonNa make you feel better and yeah. You can't control the world. You can't control the pandemic, but you can't control how you eat. You can't control that. You get some movement every day and it doesn't have to be a perfect day every day. You know it's like the eighty twenty rule like eighty percent of the time you're doing what you know is healthy. Healthy, then it's okay that twenty percent of the time you might be indulging, or you missed one workout big deal, but just get up and do something I mean right now I think it's so important that we just physically move at some point in the day, and some people will say well. I'm so busy I've got so much stuff going on, but all of it adds up. You know five minutes here. Five minutes there, standing up walking the perimeter of your house sitting back down. It all adds up, so don't. Don't get discouraged. If you don't have an hour for a workout today, yeah, and you were talking about being discouraged also before wanted you to talk a little bit more about that. Yeah, well right now. We're getting so much negative information every day. I mean I think our country sadly is more divided than ever one thing that I noticed about how Vince is. A pandemic has worn on. Is that when you compare it? To the last time? Our countries had sort of this collective trauma which would be nine eleven. We were really kind of like bonded together as a country I. Just remember like it doesn't matter what side of the aisle you're on. We're just like together in this, yeah! But now it's like everybody's. Everybody's upset. It, everybody's got a complaint about something and every time you turn on the news. It's just more and more bad news like Oh. Sorry, we're closing all of the business down again. Because you guys didn't do a good job of controlling virus so I think in general. We're just getting so much. Negative messaging and the human brain can only take so much, so it's really easy to get discouraged to feel like like you said nothing's going to end. It's all going to be bad from now on, and then also I think we're dealing with grief all. Right it's like the way life used to be where you could just freely.

Apple Vince
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

05:08 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Minutes? You commit yourself to working on one task and one only know multitasking for that twenty five minutes, and then when the timer is up, you take a little break. You take a five minute break, and then you can repeat the process for as many times as you want. And it's been like a huge productivity hat that a lot of people use, and they'll say a saves. Saves time like over the course of the day to actually get so much more done if they just do like a few pomodoro 's versus like just sitting at their desk, but being distracted all the time like what should I do next? That is such a good idea. You know it's funny because we were just I was telling you right for restarted tearing doing Joey fatone. Show. It's so fun. It's all about music and stuff in the middle of it. We were chatting and we were talking about getting things done and multitasking tears, really really good. At. Being in the moment and I and I feel like one of the reasons. He's so good at it is because he's got an assistant and he's got me. I'm not bragging I'm telling you why it works him. We like could not control his life, but we organize his life for him, so he has to worry about where he is at a given moment, because someone else worrying about where he's going next. And I think for me, that is such a big thing because I want to be able to do that in my life, even though I'm the one that has to figure out not only where I'm going next where my kids. Kids are going next and where he's going next, and all that and he doesn't really believe in multitasking because of that because he's able to, but I've never heard of Pomodoro. Yeah, it's so amazing when I discovered are like. Yes, because even if it's a task, you really don't want to do and we all have those things right like I hate invoicing. Actually do all of my own invoicing for my patients and like every month. This is the worst time of my life, but. But also I need to invoice meatballs so like. I just basically set a Pomodoro I'm like okay. You don't want to do this, but you can do it for twenty five minutes, and then before you know it, you like have half of it done in that one so I think it's just about like that's how you remove that mental block. You're like you can do anything for twenty five minutes even if it's like really not that fun, and if you can kind of just convince yourself of that, and then I think it's a great tool for kids to to teach kids how to be responsible for themselves like if A. A kid is having to do a chore or like study, and they're like having a lot of problems with patients. You can just say okay. Why don't we just do it for twenty five minutes? And then you can stop right, and so they get to learn to manage their time and themselves in that way, too. So I think it's such a good system for so many different things particularly things that you want to put off. Why is it called that Pomodoro? I don't even know why it's called the Pomodoro but it was I'm just thinking tomato sauce now I know well. The person who actually came up with it. His name is like Franks Sarah. He. He actually sells a tomato timer where it's like it's basically a timer that always used for padres just goes to twenty five minutes, and that's it, but you don't really need that. We all have timers on our phone now, but he must have had some reason, and I don't actually. Actually, know the back story, but yeah, it's like basically a tomato time. That is so funny. No, I like that I think twenty five minutes is a very doable block of time right right? Most of us can kind of imagined that right and then for people who wanNA use pomodoro throughout the day. Basically, the idea is that you'll do like three of these. These pomodoro and you get like a longer break, so you can do three of these twenty five minutes, and you'll have your five to ten minute break in between, but then you can reward yourself with like a longer break, and you can relax and and I. think it really is helpful especially for people who like you said when there's so much to organize. Organize like you do in your life. It's like Oh. My God what do I start so just go to one of those items that you know you have to get to today, and just like. Let's do a Pomodoro and then I'll see how I feel and I always feel so much better once I've done one. It's like Oh okay. I made progress well. Because, I find myself. Especially, if I have too much like my schedule is just changed, obviously, everyone's schedules of change but I used to be very regimented like I. Get up in the morning early I throw on workout clothes. Get my kids up I. Take Them to school I workout, and then I go to work so whatever that means podcast, Youtube, filming or meetings, or whatever it is I do that, but now obviously for the last many months it hasn't been an I find myself like putting off the working out to the afternoon, and and doing all that kind of thing, or and is why like the Pomodoro idea is the? If like in the middle of it like checking my instagram or just let for like for like a mental break in the middle of whatever I'm doing or like. A dog sees a squirrel. Squirrel like there's a news break on this I. The watch which keeps telling me when there's a news break. I got to figure out how to turn that off. Turn that off, but it's like it's very hard so I liked the commodore thing. How do we stop procrastinating? Though from things like even within the day? Yeah, and I'm so glad you brought up that whole idea of like meeting schedule because you know both you and I, we work much better when they're structure right and now we're in this world.

Joey fatone Youtube padres Franks Sarah
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

06:20 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Is that it will come back, but I actually think that maybe this whole pandemic is going to be good for the cruise industry in the long run because I, think always they needed to. You know there's always been talk of like your stomach, flu, bugs or problems with the food or the septic systems, or whatever because all of these people living on this floating? World yes. So I mean I think. Maybe it'll end up being good that they'll be new protocols and whatnot Oh. Totally I mean you always hear about that? You know when somebody gets sick on a cruise and everybody gets sick and actually the last time we were on, it's amazing. We still have a good vacation. The very first day like we literally just pulled away from the harbor, and they said Hi guys so like there's an illness aboard. We're like what. And we had to be on this cruise for like another ten day. The might all that God. Luckily? We didn't get sick, but it was hilarious. They played like so many videos everywhere. You went of like how to wash your hands, and obviously Dr is very helpful now during Kobe like okay. It's GonNa be out twenty seconds water all, but they played that everywhere got drilled into my mind. I'm excited. I was like okay. I'M GONNA. Do The cruise hand washing? Is it like. What was the song? Do you remember it? Oh i. got it was hilarious. There was like a little kitty song was so cute. They made kind of like a cartoon song, and they basically said if you can't remember the song been seeing happy birthday when you're washing your hands, so that's what? I just I just hung happy birthday to myself and make sure that my hands are under the Faucet for that. My God that's so funny. Now one of the reasons I. I just wanted to see you. That's why I wanted you on the show, and you're so smart, and you've so much to talk about I really I been going back to your book a lot. Because I think I've definitely new, and I've talked about this, but I've definitely had self sabotage issues in my life, and we all do, and it's such an important book, but I think especially right now. The IDEA OF SELF SABOTAGE I! Think could be very high, because I for me personally when the whole first lockdown happen. You know I was on fire I'm going to do this. I'm going to do that. I'm going to get in the best shape of my life I'm GonNA learn a language I'm doing and then I did nothing and then everything kind of rebound. I mean it's been like just such a roller coaster and I. Myself worried that I'm slipping back into those habits. Kind of just wanted to talk to you about. About all that. Yeah, thank you so much. You know. I appreciate you going back to my book again and just like you said self sabotage is universal and I think when this all happened, everybody was thinking okay. No worries silver linings will stay home. I'll be super productive. We'll get house projects. Don We're going to be awesome? Parent champions help our kids with their education. Make them feel great about themselves. Blah and then. As it wears on and we feel like we're losing more and more control every day because you know all the directives keep changing. We have no idea what's going to happen the next day. And because human beings really aren't meant to stay, still, I mean. You're a very active person, so am I and we need to be out. We need to be doing things you need to be running around. And that's actually how all human bodies are really designed, and so I think all of that can really clutter up your mind, make it feel sluggish, and then it's just easy to not only feel discouraged, but also. Also, just to say I'll do tomorrow so i. feel like a big part of the self sabotage, and this was certainly my issue back in the day, and it's something that I have to watch every day. It's like procrastination issues like how not to put things off, and then also how not to get discouraged. All of us feel that way right now. I mean I have certain days where I wake up and I'm. Like Yuk. Yeah, Let's start with the procrastination because I think that is such a good point especially when it feels like this is endless. Beginning when we were like Oh this is going to be a few weeks and Blah Blah Blah then we'll get back to normal. The endless, Whether that's true or not, it's obviously not going to be endless. There will be you know an end to all of this, but. It is so easy to put things up because. I have so much time. This is never ending and I think for me like right. When things started opening up again, I was like. Wait. Am I ready to go outside? Yeah I. Don't know if I am and so now what like we're going in the wrong direction? Unfortunately with this whole thing? And now we're it seems to me like I know with my family were becoming more unlocked down again. And then, but it makes me now do the same thing. Am I putting it off? How long can you put it off? And how can you prioritize it? And how do you know what you're procrastinating and what? You're actually like delegating to differ days? Absolutely, that's a really good question. Yeah, so definitely I think you have to get good with your priorities of what really needs to be done today tomorrow sometime. Sometime next week and what I like to use to try to motivate myself. Is I I I when I do my to do i. just like write everything down. It's a brain dump because if you're trying to organize yourself as you're writing than it just takes forever, then you get stressed so everything down I, but then I go back and categorize that, so they wait like a master list. You make master. I just make a running list of like okay. What is in my head right now? Because the sooner you can get all that stuff on your in your head onto paper is actually less overwhelming. Even if you feel like there's a lot because down. It's out of your head. You don't have to think about anymore, but once it's all written down. I like to go back and prioritize so I. Go back and if it's something that I have to the next twenty four hours. I put a next to it. If it's something that needs to be done in the next couple of days, put be, and then if it's something that's more like a week or whatever it's like a little. Little bit farther out I put a C. and just make sure that I. Get to the as right away I. Know a lot of times people will say okay and let me just really little things done in the morning because they'll make me feel good, but actually for every human being no matter. If you're a night owl, or you're an early Lark, our brains are sharper in the morning. We're better at concentrate in the morning, so you gotta start with those hard projects, and then my favorite hack right now to get started without delay is using a system called the Pomodoro and the PADRO system is so easy, basically what you do. Is You set a timer for twenty five minutes? You commit yourself to working on one task and one only know multitasking for that twenty five minutes, and then when the timer is up, you take a little break..

Don
"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

Heather Dubrow's World

07:42 min | 3 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Heather Dubrow's World

"Heather dubrow zero. Two Times a week right here in podcast one welcome back everybody I'm so excited I have a fabulous guests with me today. On the show. She is an author. She's a doctor. She's incredible I adore her. Her name is Dr Judy. Ho Short wrote this incredible book. About. How did not self sabotage? Import Right now. We've time to talk about. Please welcome Dr Judy. How high had their? I'm so to see you again? I know you to look gorgeous what? Like I have no makeup on. Over here you're like made up, you look fabulous. That's not fair. I took an hour getting ready for you and you look beautiful even without. Is An accomplishment for sure you're very soon. Are you wearing an apple? Watch? I am wearing Apple Watch. It's like I've been living my life with my Apple Watch lately. Okay, let's talk about this because I just got the Apple Watch and I don't know it was kind of mean to be. Yesterday told me that I like I didn't do enough. vibe to me. I'm just I'm not one hundred percent. Sure about it. You know what I watch is extremely judgmental like sometimes if I don't get to my workout till later in the day by like eleven am, it'll be like hello. You should have been moving more by now. I'm like WHOA. Like calm down like that's just so you're right is a very judgmental watch. It's a very cute. No it's I tried to make a cute. I bought a couple of bands and they just don't look right. You know so, it's not A. It's not a flattering watch. It's very functional. Though I have it has grown on me, and I'd like closing the ring every day. You feel good about yourself and you close the rain yet. You feel like you've accomplished something I. Think it's good, I wish it had a feature. Get an APP that tells you how much water you've had to drink. Yes, I wish it had that kind of feature because I'm definitely missing, but I mean I like the fact that you have to stand up. I mean you're. You're very active. I'm very active so I think even still it's telling me to get up and move around. Whatever Saddam sit at the desk and try to get a lot of stuff done, and you don't realize you're not moving but i. just kind of wish. It was cuter then I saw air. MEZ MAKES ONE and it's still not cute. It's very expensive. I know it's like. Is it really worth it to get two thousand dollars band and it's not even attractive. I mean that's the problem. I think they really need to fix that problem. Yeah, I agree. I even tried to put like a cute bracelet next to it to like you. Pump it up a little bit. It just didn't work as a work, doesn't I'm sorry to hide it from view. If I'm doing anything where I have to be seen exactly all right, so tell everyone a little bit. Who for people that don't know you what your background is sort of like the judy story? Okay, so on the clinical and forensic neuropsychologist and you might have seen me on the TV. Show the doctors. Doctors were Co host I I became acquainted with you and your husband when you guys interviewed me for my bookstop self sabotage, I'm married. It's been oh my gosh. We got married in two thousand fifteen, so we've been married for more than five years. My husband is a physician to just like your husband and so right now in the middle of the Kobe pandemic. He's definitely so so busy and the hospital swamped. But you know we both live in Los Angeles and his family is literally ten minutes away. My sister just moved a mile away from me. She is a professional poker player. And now she lives a mile away from me. So now we're trying to get my parents who live in Arcadia which is obviously aren't there from where we are. We're in the South Bay. We're hoping to get them to get closer. Closer us by the way that is so funny to me, because people always comment about Terry about how he's a plastic surgeon, and how his brother was the lead singer of quiet riot, so as there was a rock star, and he's a surgeon. I love the dichotomy of the fact that you're a neuropsychologist, said neuro psychiatrist, saying that right narrow psychologists. Yeah, you're neuro-psychologist and your sisters are professional poker player. I know she is totally. The black sheep of the family liked, but doing so well for. An, exciting career, and actually both of us are using psychology our careers. She's just using street psychology. You know what I mean because dot is such a big part of playing poker. That's so injuries. So what is she to I'm assuming she usually travels around and does. Tournaments and whatnot. How what is she doing now? She's in Vegas right now because we're in the middle of the world series of poker, which is like a huge event every year that is held in Vegas obviously right now because Kobe. They've had to make all kinds of. Changes and so actually they're all playing online salt. Be there in person to play online for to be legal, so she's still having over Vegas over there right now. Playing Poker, but yeah generally travels the world. She plays poker. She actually does a lot of commentary to so she hosts her grams about poker on channels like ESPN and it's Super Fun to get to see her living in her element. Wow, that is very cool. Yeah, it's a crazy. Crazy life like literally whenever I go to Vegas. People are following around 'cause. She's really famous poker player and people are just following US around asking for photographs, people are like staring at us when we're at the buffet, trying to just have a nice dinner so it's funny, because my sister is literally legendary in the poker industry. She's actually ranked number three of all female poker players in the world right now. Okay? What's her name Maria Ho? I have to go look up now. That's crazy. I don't know anything about poker. Driver Pete He goes to Vegas a lot and he was telling me he was there actually a couple of weeks ago and how crazy it is right now. I guess the casinos are still open. Wow. But a lot of the Strip is not open and you have to wear mask. In there, but You're still have a smoking section. So how does that work I? Don't know how that works because then, aren't you taking off your mass? Just smoke? I mean it's such a weird. I mean I don't think they really know what to do. Because obviously, this is unprecedented, and no one knows what's working. What's not and people want the economy to still be functioning to some level, but you know in Los Angeles. Obviously all the card rooms are closed, but I Have Never Seen Vegas closed in my life like when Vegas close down. Even partially you know something's wrong right like nothing now. Dad It's crazy. We love a I. Love Vacationing Vegas I love seeing the show and getting awesome dinners. ANSI VEGAS AND I don't even know when we're all going to feel comfortable doing things like that now. Have you traveled at all? I? Haven't no I have been very good to basically stay in one place. Do all my work in my patient work on zoom. and rarely rarely. Do I really go out and interact with the world? Only for chores and necessities and stuff like that, but we miss. We miss traveling so much and you know. We actually had a really good experience a couple years ago on a cruise. We're like Oh, we didn't think rely cruises, but we love cruises now and lay out. We went on a really good Royal Caribbean cruise, and now I'm just like. When are we ever going to get to do that again like? I! Don't know the only one thing I could say about the cruise industry, because my parents were always really into cruising, and we went a few times when we were in high school. I think Terry's not a boat guy. You know he gets seasick. So that's how his things probably not mark cards, but it's such a huge industry, but my only thing is is. Is that it will come back, but I actually think that maybe this whole pandemic is going to be good for the cruise industry in the long run because I, think always they.

Vegas apple Los Angeles Dr Judy Terry Heather dubrow Ho Short VEGAS Maria Ho Arcadia Saddam Pete He Co South Bay ESPN Kobe
"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

Dr. Judy WTF

03:38 min | 5 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

"Let's all oral stuff. Let's call each other about by the humid. Like much more connected to our humanity, because just because anybody's. Particular is A. GotTa go deeper than Ma. was come on just because I have white skin. Doi- exclude. I'm a little bit kind of Yellowish Pinkish I. Don't Know Okay and. So so so we really you know not fair. It's not fair to play the projection gate. Okay, got Stop it! I know we only have a few minutes so I invite everyone to definitely contact me. Let's get a piece conversation going in. Can All pediatric of the Peaceful Healing Dialogue I WANNA read? Lyrics of assault call conversation piece John. All inviting you to take and I. Also said it up. If you show up, okay, so thank you so much for calling in and I'll end with reading this this beautiful home the lyrics to this beautiful song. Thank you? Thank you Dr Judy. Okay so this is called conversation piece. By stevie wonder and how abasing. Stevie wonder of black man who is flying is so. Is Open so awaken aware and. It's just a testament to the fact. That subtypes are is sort deceiving, so he has no sight, but he has a soul and he. Fix that maybe we need to wake up and start seeing. We need to start. Stop seeing with our highs so much stock. Start seeing with our soul. Okay lyric starting rider. Two thousand eight G. as mass atrocities to man, has no history, but just a glance at light in two thousand be see you fi- traces of man's inhumanity demands, so he's spanning a whole, you know. Thousand few thousand years here we find traces of Man's inhumanity demand. This is a multi generational history. There's no mystery all for one one for all. There's no way will reach are our greatest highs unless we heed the call me you you for me, underline that, and that's the synergy need for you you for me. That creates synergy on adding that. There's no chance of world salvation less conversations piece. We can't pause watch and saying no. This can't be when there's. A plan by any means on to nave planning of once Mississippi Magic. A world where were cleaning each other's ethnicity? pretty. We should act as if we don't see nor hear like the holocaust of six million Jews and one hundred fifty million last year slavery, all for one one for all. There's no way will reach our greatest heights. Unless we hear the call. He's right. There's no way we will reach our greatest hikes. A less we come together as united unanimity in my message.

stevie wonder Mississippi Magic assault Dr Judy A. Ma. John
A disgraced scientist and a viral video: how a Covid conspiracy theory started

Cyber Talk Radio

03:48 min | 5 months ago

A disgraced scientist and a viral video: how a Covid conspiracy theory started

"The last week we saw the first true hit conspiracy video the coronavirus era it was called the plan Dimmick and got over eight million views on Facebook and YouTube the video has since been removed but not before making the start of discredited scientist Dr Judy make of it this video also purported to say that if you wear a facemask it could reactivate the corona virus in your body for more on what to know about the plan to make a conspiracy video will speak to Casey Newton Silicon Valley editor at the verge so the video is conspiracy theory as you notes and the basic idea seems to be is that some shadow we elites are conspiring to use the pandemic to seize power maybe make money by creating vaccines and the star of this twenty six minute clip that went viral is this woman named Judy make of that it's who has become a kind of hero to the anti vaccine crowd she's a discredited scientist who published a book in April called plague of corruption that sort of depicts her as a truth teller fighting scientists who are willing to accept inconvenience facts and so far right publications began to promote her book in this documentary that is forthcoming will apparently be taking an even closer look at these sort of baseless conspiracies this video has since since it kind of blew up has been taken down but tell us about some of the crazy accusations and I mean one of the things that keeps popping up I think it was the main thing that really got to pull down was they were saying that wearing a mask will literally activate your own virus that's right and that is the thing that got it taken down platforms like YouTube and Facebook generally do not want to remove content from the network and they tried to enable a maximum out of free speech but they do make an exception for stuff that is actively harmful and while a lot of this video plan that make is just kind of conspiracies saying don't forget a lot of people are making money and other people are going to become more powerful that's not why it got taken down I got taken down because as you say it warned people against wearing masks you know saying that it would re inspect on which of course there is no basis for that whatsoever but you can imagine it's a lot of people watch that and believe that you could have a really negative a stacked on public health so initially Facebook didn't want to remove it but when it sort of stumbled across that particular claim it said okay we've actually got to take this thing down and Dr Judy make if it's for herself she does have a degree in biology from the university of Virginia a PhD in molecular biology she worked on the national Cancer Institute she has a lot of things under her belt but then she started getting into work about chronic fatigue syndrome and vaccines and this is kind of where she was derailed a little bit a lot of people discredited a lot of the later things that she was researching so like in two thousand nine she had published research saying that a mouse retrovirus because chronic fatigue syndrome which got a lot of attention but it was discredited a couple years later and the journal ultimately retracted it and then in this sort of like a weird aside story she was actually put in jail on charges of the staffed which apparently involves computers disappearing those charges were dropped but the whole thing was a scandal and she was kind of sideline and lost her scientific career but after that she sort of drifted into this anti VAX crowd and because of the credentials that you mentioned the anti vaxxers have sort of lifted her up as this brave truth teller even though what she saying is largely

Coronavirus may never go away, World Health Organization warns

WTOP 24 Hour News

00:36 sec | 5 months ago

Coronavirus may never go away, World Health Organization warns

"What is covered nineteen was here in the U. S. long before we thought well a noted forensic pathologist says that is likely the case Dr Judy Melnick thanks it was here in November or maybe even earlier some of my clinical colleagues are saying oh yeah in late fall early winter we were having lots of cases of people with pneumonia and A. R. D. S. and they were testing negative for influenza a and B. but here's what's got them thinking about deaths that took place last year we have called a nineteen testing at the time Santa Clara California is the place for the first known code nineteen deaths from communities spread happened as a result some of those people a significant number of them in Santa Clara county may have died and not have been certified correctly details on the target USA podcast JJ green WTOP

Pneumonia Santa Clara California Santa Clara County Dr Judy Melnick A. R. D. S. USA
"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

Dr. Judy WTF

03:44 min | 8 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Dr. Judy WTF

"That's loud. Okay Hi everyone. This is Dr Judy here from the psychological healing center. Doctor Judy what the Freud and tonight's topic is I'm sure one that you have heard me talk about. I'm kind of combining concept's here so that we can See the magnitude of what some people have to live through. And what how? Some people have been injured in. Tonight's topic is the passive aggressive narcissist. So this is a Colin. Show everyone so. Please feel free to call in because we're going to look at two sides of the coin. We're going to look at the side of the coin of the injuries that are associated with the passive aggressive narcissist. They are behaving like that. What the Freud is going on and how they impact people around them who stay in the system corn wrong and first thing that I wanNA talk about. Of course is what's happening. Globally and that is the corona virus. And I just am probably as confused as most of you out there about this and terms of how do you know you have it? I personally have a a little cold right now. I'm sniffling A little bit of a cough but I don't know what does that mean I'm thinking about it. Also because no matter whether we like it or not. The Corona virus is an example of we are inter connected. There's no way to deny that fact and if we're interconnected meaning that Through our association with each other through our affiliation with each other we have impact on each other than that also means that we are psychologically inter connected so. Let's look at A term that I constantly using my therapy in my book on the videos the youtube videos a term called the psycho virus so we've got the corona virus which is very aggressive. It's also kind of passive because it's passed over to people and it's passive in the sense that it's not glaringly telling you to keep away. You don't know you might touch. Somebody might shake somebody's hands. You don't know how this Corona Virus Can impact or transmit to you So the very similar to To to the psycho virus because in the case of the psycho virus which I make to mean or I have defined to mean The psychological virus that is passed from generation to generation. And if we don't bust the system gone wrong. Unfortunately we are doomed to repeat the system. And that's why I call this. Show Dr Judy. What the Freud thanks to Sigmund Freud who came up with the concept of the repetition principal. And how we CanNot move forward until we complete things from the past so with that said. I think there is a call in and I have a lot of information so When you do call in please keep your story relevant to the topic and hello. You are on the couch with Dr Judy. And what is your name? Please my name.

Dr Judy Sigmund Freud cough youtube principal
"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

The Art of Charm

12:03 min | 10 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

"Get exclusive access to invites and great conversation and at the art of charm. which is your biggest her? You know I think for me. It's probably the should I think it's it's another one of those Taipei. You pay high-achieving people. I should've gotten more done today. I feel guilty. Sometimes if I've been less productive on a day than I was hoping to in in my head it's hard I mean I still struggle with it and I have to back up and say you know what it's okay you know. Mine is personalization. Johnny knows this is to and it's it's one of those we break it down in class so you think I should be able to overcome it but I still do it. This idea of I'm the focus focus on my own movies so everything happening around me is because of me and all of a sudden you're in that cognitive distortion. It's hard to find out what's yours johnny. When I was younger it was certainly black black and white thinking I tell this story all the time always were black bin Laden livestream? It was one of the reasons where I had my ex-girlfriend in my twenties she. She was trying to argue with me about whatever it was and she mentions like life isn't black white. You do this all the time and I I do not and she just this opens the closet and there was white shirts and black shirts and I got so mad because well she was checkmate. So I I was like I'm I'm out of here and I went to the mall and I bought a red shirt and I put it in the middle. There was there But I get at the time. They certainly change as well. I think I deal with a little bit of should now but in my twenty s it was certainly black. I'm white thinking and there was always. Yeah those were definitely the the two main company one we see in our classes to is discounting the positive yes. It's so easy easy to just nope that wasn't for me or no. That's not really positive and we really have to date and ask them okay. But let's talk about the last time you were out. How many people well did you talk to? How many people did you socialize? Did you approach a stranger. No then this is a positive there are tons of positives you are discounting them the US the other thing about I and perhaps you can shed some light on this this. We've seen that the smarter you are the the more intricate this rationalizations and the web of thinking geds ads. And I certainly have argued with people who are trying to rationalize cogs in the storage with another cognitive distortion. And I'm like I I like. Let's take this one away. That's cardinal distortion. Let's take this one left and they're like yeah. They're just freaked out. It's so funny that it's causing tain reaction sometimes somebody tries to get you to look at that distortion. They just give you another one. Just keep going from there. But you're right and I think that people sometimes the discounting the positive is really huge. It's almost like you know. I don't want to be a part of a club that would have me as a member of any time. They actually get something it's like. Yeah but everybody can do But can they also. Were you able to do this a week ago. You weren't so this is a big deal and they almost take that away from themselves when they do something well and that again just contributes to possibly lower self concept overall right. It's selective memory of this wasn't a big deal anyway. There are a number of cognitive distortions episode bestowed seven or four. If you are interested in this discussion we go deep into then. The Batt House guests look and when you start to recognize them we can now start. Step two which ages de-activating these triggers. Yes so deactivating. Your triggers is huge. Because now that you know that these triggers are there. It's kind of scary. Like oh great so my head is just filled with all these thoughts odds on average fifty thousand thought fragments in a day. Of course we're not processing all of it but it is still wreaking havoc on our emotional life and also then leading to certain behaviors. And so you have to deactivate them. You have to deactivate the triggers and I talk about three different methods of deactivating them one is to change them so that is the classic cognitive behavioral Therapy approaches to question them and then to try to change them so really the questioning of it is just not thinking of your thoughts are reality. It's so easy for us to do that. It's the way that language is constructed. The minute that we have thought we think it's either GonNa occur has already occurred and so it's really about routinely questioning it like what's the validity behind this thought. Let's play not so much pros and cons list but evidence for an evidence against a particular thought and really taking a look and trying to balance it out. oftentimes people have distortions. Because it's maybe one sided and so one quick technique I ask people to do is to try to construct a new sentence with yes dot dot dot but dot dot dot race. Oh yes I still haven't gotten to the promotion motion that I wanted but I have gotten three amazing performance evaluations in a row. And I feel like I'm really ready to ask for for that next step soon right. It's like people don't sometimes recognize where they are in the journey and they only think about one step of the way the but is what they're discounting completely flatly. There enabled to look at that and I think another big part of this and we talk a lot about on this on. The show is just journaling. When you actually start to write down your thoughts you process them? And then the best part is he gets a flip back through your journal and see those thoughts three or four months ago like what planet was. Aj on that is not reality reality at all but we we fuse our thoughts to are being in our emotions and all of a sudden they can start to wreak havoc on our emotional life. And it's it's really frustrating. When you see these patterns and others and then you start to think? I'm probably doing the pattern myself. Just don't realize it takes. Some honesty takes talking and communicating with people. Trust as well I think it makes all his difficult is surly when your heroes or people that you look up to. Yeah they're flaws nor the work that they've done on themselves to get in the positions that they're in is as is shown it's not romanticize it just shows us amazing person who's done all this stuff and maybe their book or the the the biopic or it's all the highlights. If there is some down they made show. The person had a phase where they were baby party in a bit too much or whatever but it doesn't go through that work and so for instance and going through your book and I was reading all the exercise I was like. Oh how wonderful. Oh how great. It's like if these show the work that a lot of these people do of being reflective of mindfulness meditation writing just getting their thoughts. It's out so you could see what had taken from the get there. I think more people would do these things but like even for me read through it and it's like well John Wayne would never do that. Lake doc bed. John Wayne was scribbling and writing his memoirs and seeing looking at what his thoughts arming. It's a very natural part of growth furniture's not shown enough right and I think people might think writing thoughts journaling. I'm sure you guys kit. That like resistance to it but but it is so helpful because you actually put your thoughts on a page. They become external just in that process. Right even when it's inside your head if you'll so amorphous Morphou. It feels like you can't tackle it when people doesn't it always feel better when you put something down on a to do list. It's scary because you're like too many Jews but once you put it on a page it it actually does feel better if feels like you can manage it and then you can really look at it and decide what to do next and not be overwhelmed. Not The over. That's the problem. We're overwhelmed were were ready and willing to self sabotage and we asked this question all the time in class. Is there evidence that the thought is incorrect because we we are so primed to find the truth behind our thoughts and rationalize that our thoughts are real. We very rarely go. Could there be an alternate explanation for this and Johnny. You have a classic example that I I love from class about walking down the street and people laughing because I feel like we all can relate to this. We'll yeah I mean when I told told the guys is I use the scenario. You're walking on the street and let's just say that leading up to that hasn't been a very good week. Maybe you blew something that work and when you're beating yourself up maybe a little bit under the weather and when you woke up that morning you realize you didn't wash clothes and you're trying to put something together that's not offensive. They're not feeling very good about yourself. And now you're walking on the street and let's say you pass three people and as you pass them they just start laughing now. We know the whirlwind of thoughts that are going to pop up in that scenario. Yes and we are geared to take the bad one for many different reasons Certainly evolutionary reasons as we talked about. But there's also people that the done in Kruger effect where people with high intelligence are going to rate themselves on things they don't know about rather low. It's just an easier thing to do. Take the the bad one and work from there and so many different reasons to be geared towards that and allowing people to think through that right and realize well why can't you have chosen the good one or why did you make this about yourself whether or not it was good or bad right. Yes personalization again right where they must be laughing about me as opposed to mid conversation before I walked up. Maybe it's just a continuation attenuation of that conversation. And they're having a little joke and it's about them and it's not about me but it is so easy to go there and it's so easy for us to look for that confirming evidence because we don't Leichhardt of distance right as human beings distances just the worst thing ever and so even when a belief is negative we'd almost rather find the confirming the evidence so that it's a consistent picture as opposed to. Oh wait a minute. Maybe they're saying something wonderful about me for once. Maybe not even the first time but at least you're GONNA try to start recognizing that as a possibility so the first strategy is question thoughts and then the second strategy you talk about. The book is modify thoughts break down so the modifying edifying thoughts is to really try to get in there and again once you've examined the thoughts and as you mentioned you know what the evidence against right. What's the evidence for? What's the evidence against now that you have it in in front of you? Let's look at how we can actually change the thoughts but you know in a way that feels meaningful so most people do these exercises and there are very intellectual exercise. You know. They'll say well. I feel like a loser today today but I guess I'm not a loser. I'm like well. That's a very lazy modifying the thoughts. I know you don't believe that you did not me. Yeah you're not selling it to me and you're not selling it to yourself so you have to be honest. Find a thought that you can get on board with that. Maybe isn't so grand sweeping right going from I'm loser now not two okay. Let's just talk about what's going on today. Let's talk about this particular situation. Break it down and find a balanced way to look at the situation and there's a really really quick pneumonic that I utilized to them which is like the three C.'s. So it was like catch it. Check it and then changes so catch it. Catch the thought check the thought for both sides rights and then change it but in a way that you can at least get on board with it to some level of believability right. So I tell them to do a believability rating like what's the believability of this new. You thought I mean I'm not expecting it to be a ten out of ten but it's got to be at least like a five or six out of ten or else or else we just did that exercise in vain and it's not going to actually change your actions accents. Yeah then. It's those silly affirmations that we've seen on Saturday night live where I'm good enough. I'm strong enough. People like me that you're not gonNA buy into can reinforce in certainly not changing the thought and I think when again as Johnny was saying with the Dunning Kruger effect working. It's very easy for us to be like but I don't know this so I don't have evidence evidence for this so I can't make that grand sweeping change of this thought but we have to just dig a little deeper and start observing things a little bit more..

cognitive distortion Johnny John Wayne Taipei US Batt House C. Kruger effect Aj Dunning Kruger Lake doc
"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

The Art of Charm

10:00 min | 10 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

"More about these advanced social skills programs grams. Go to the Arctic charm dot com slash boot camp for more details and sign up for our newsletter. Now thank you everyone for tuning in. Let's kick off the show today. We have Dr Judy go with us now. Johnny and I loved her reason book. Stop Self sabotage six tabs to unlock your true motivation and harness your willpower. And of course get out of your own one way and we're super excited about it. I know all of us are working on our New Year's resolutions. So how can we stop that self sabotage. We'll Dr Ho's a clinical neuropsychologist zero psychologists and a tenured professor and researcher at Pepperdine University. She also works is a forensic expert and consultant and she's here to help us with just that. Hello Hello and welcome to the show. Dr Ho. It's so great to have you in studio with us today. Hi thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here. Thank you for joining us and of course yes. We enjoyed reading the book. It's a topic. That's near and dear to our hearts as we talk about personal development and changing yourself but we know first and foremost what made you decide to write a book on self sabotage you know I saw self sabotage in everyone around me so I'm not just talking about my patients. I'm talking about my family members. There's my friends my colleagues and even to a degree myself especially in my twenties and I saw that for me my main sabotage. Todd was procrastination. And there's always a way to make that sound really good in your head like Oh. I'm the kind of person who if I wait till the last minute. It's going to be amazing mazing right until it's not until the day when you fail a paper in your Grad program. which is what happened to me which really made me take a look and say? Was this really the best thing for me me but I mean I did that for so long and told myself at. That was the right thing to do to get myself motivated enough to put out my best work so now knowing that are are you the character procrastinates in the book or does that you write yourself so all of the character in the book are based on Real People that I've worked with or they were my family members or my clients obviously personal details change that they're not looking at this and thinking. Oh my Gosh Judy's writing about me but no I did not based on myself. Although when I wrote that chapter chapter was one of the easiest chapter felt like Yup. I know this person I how I know how I feel when I was in this mode. And you bring. Yeah good point because it's easy to spot and others but we are telling a story in our head to rationalize our own self sabotage and exactly that for procrastinators Rasa who've been rewarded for procrastination. It's easy to be like. Oh I'm under pressure I'm definitely GONNA perform. I perform well under pressure. That's the narrative that's the reason to procrastinate estimate and of course we're going to dig into how can we self diagnose to stop this. It's so easy as we were talking about before. The show started to see it in celebrities to see it in others. But it's difficult to see it in ourselves and it seems to me like this is one of those things that almost everyone struggles with. Yes why do you think it's so common. Well I do think that sap sabotage is universal that we all have the inclination to sell sabotage. But it's really about what it becomes an issue you right if it becomes a pattern and I think people do it because even though they say that they want something getting there is actually really difficult. It's scary because change is scary. And so we say we want these things. But we had this approach avoidance conflict the closer we get to the goal. We all start thinking about all. The things are so bad once we reach their for example with health and Diet. I oftentimes find that people will get so close to their galway or whatever it is and then all of a sudden start thinking about how hard urges to maintain that and then they'll start to take a huge step back. They'll go on like a one weekend bench fast and then they'll beat themselves up and then it kind of sets them back for two or three weeks and even simpler simpler stuff where you started a diet. You're all excited than you slip once. And then you just throw the Diet out the window and it's very difficult to restart towards that goal when we feel like we've gone a little off course and I know myself I've sabotage on my health goals on my New Year's resolutions even and I feel like when you start to. Let's see the patterns in yourself which we're gonNA talk about a little bit. It becomes a lot easier to stop that before it starts exactly. It's all about being able to identify the patterns that you I'm no than what to do about it and somebody that we run away from that you know we don't want to deal with it. We sort of have this escapist or avoid mindset towards doing the self examination. So you do have to do that. And then you can have a lot of good action steps in the right direction and I think obviously with a new year everyone even chuckles about resolutions. Now do you think over the past few decades. We've come even further into our own way of self sabotaging. Yes I feel like your resolutions can be a real hotbed for people's self sabotage. Because you commit to this thing that has really tied to an arbitrary day and you know everybody else is doing the same thing and then the minute that you make a misstep up you start to look around you evaluate yourself against someone else and that can set you farther away from where you WanNa go. I've actually advised some of my clients and my friends if that's you just don't do a new resolution per se. Just do a goal. Did you go whatever. Why does it have to be January? I December thirtieth. You know. Just don't be so black and white about it. Because I think people get really really really fixated on this idea of. It's a new year. I don't WanNA blow that New Year but it's arbitrary a lot of these things that we think are common incense. We've never really dug deep enough to understand why they are. I always have this saying that. I've been eating my whole life but I've never really learned how to eat and toes in in my late twenties. No exercise didn't really learn how to do that until I was in my early thirties. So a lot of these these things we've been told we hear about them but there's an understanding behind them as a takes about getting interested and to get the knowledge so we then we can actually the implement these things so that actually mean something to us right and I think that that's a really good point. It's really about learning and sort of stepping back and taking that educational process process on and it is sort of a new thing. Because if you've never done that self examination you wouldn't really know where to start so you do have to start from the beginning but the good news is once you start Dan. You really have a prescription plan for how to address all of the pitfalls I come up and I think that's the scary part right the self reflection admission of guilt right. I'm the procrastinator I'm a sabotage that's really the hardest part for a lot of us as we hold ourselves in high regard you see it and others but to say okay let me dig a little L. D. Bre here and see what's going on the other thing I want to make. No this will go on with your point is people tend to look at self sabotage as if I'm dying to go back and do some reflecting to find out why I'm doing this then. There must have been something horrible in my past. That has led me to continue doing this. Now it doesn't have to be that at all. You could have been wrapped in bubble. Wrap your whole entire childhood. That will be the problem. There is no perfect way to raise. A child is just giving the child enough for it to understand that it's limited still need to grow after it leaves the house and to recognize deficiencies so that it can get to work on itself right. I mean growth is forever growth. Is All your life right and I think that sometimes it's difficult to take a look as you mentioned this admission of guilt. But it really doesn't have to be like that because as I mentioned earlier self sabotage is universal. So we're all GonNa do it at some point but if it becomes a pattern let's take a look at it so there's no shame about it. We're all wired to do it. In many ways biologically physiologically evolutionary. It's almost like something that was adaptive gets turned on its head because we all have to watch out for fears. You know we. We have to protect ourselves. But if that particular drive becomes more prominent than thinking about all the rewards that can come with you going forward and taking the risk that's when the self sabotage switch happens it's like all the fears of today though is not a physical fear per se. We're not running away from the Sabertooth Tiger. We're running away from possible possible rejection possibly getting somewhere slower than maybe your friend or your sister you know. All of these comparison that we do they can feel just a scary to us and trigger trigger that fight or flight the same way that a physical threat can think it's difficult for people to understand how easily that fight or flight mechanism gets turned on. We certainly have some fun with our clients in our classrooms With it so they can fill that but it doesn't take much for your body to flip that switch and in that moment which your rational thought process goes right out the window right when the fighter flight switch turns on the frontal lobe which allows allows us to be the human beings that thriving human beings top of the food chain species that we are. It's not really active. It's all the more primordial it just drive to get away from whatever scaring you and I think that that's what people don't realize like wow I couldn't logic my way out of that one yet because now center wasn't really working in in that moment and that fight or flight switch turns on so quickly and then people blame themselves for it but I always try to educate people who do you think survived from your ancestors the people who already learned mindfulness and we're mindful eating berries and didn't see that a bear came and was at the nervous. Nellie that we're always looking around and darting putting behind bushes but they were the ones who survived so in many ways it's in our genes right. It's in our genome that our ancestors were more of the nervous nowadays are probably the ones populated the earth and so now we have some of that and it's not a bad thing as long as we know what it is and know how to work with them. I get ten seconds. If you've been enjoying the show Oh and learning something of value each and every week. We'll your next step. Might be coming out for a week. Long residential program imagine diving deeper.

Dr Judy Dr Ho Pepperdine University Johnny consultant galway Todd Rasa Nellie professor L. D. Bre researcher Dan
"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

The Art of Charm

10:00 min | 10 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

"More about these advanced social skills programs grams. Go to the Arctic charm dot com slash boot camp for more details and sign up for our newsletter. Now thank you everyone for tuning in. Let's kick off the show today. We have Dr Judy go with us now. Johnny and I loved her reason book. Stop Self sabotage six tabs to unlock your true motivation and harness your willpower. And of course get out of your own one way and we're super excited about it. I know all of us are working on our New Year's resolutions. So how can we stop that self sabotage. We'll Dr Ho's a clinical neuropsychologist zero psychologists and a tenured professor and researcher at Pepperdine University. She also works is a forensic expert and consultant and she's here to help us with just that. Hello Hello and welcome to the show. Dr Ho. It's so great to have you in studio with us today. Hi thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here. Thank you for joining us and of course yes. We enjoyed reading the book. It's a topic. That's near and dear to our hearts as we talk about personal development and changing yourself but we know first and foremost what made you decide to write a book on self sabotage you know I saw self sabotage in everyone around me so I'm not just talking about my patients. I'm talking about my family members. There's my friends my colleagues and even to a degree myself especially in my twenties and I saw that for me my main sabotage. Todd was procrastination. And there's always a way to make that sound really good in your head like Oh. I'm the kind of person who if I wait till the last minute. It's going to be amazing mazing right until it's not until the day when you fail a paper in your Grad program. which is what happened to me which really made me take a look and say? Was this really the best thing for me me but I mean I did that for so long and told myself at. That was the right thing to do to get myself motivated enough to put out my best work so now knowing that are are you the character procrastinates in the book or does that you write yourself so all of the character in the book are based on Real People that I've worked with or they were my family members or my clients obviously personal details change that they're not looking at this and thinking. Oh my Gosh Judy's writing about me but no I did not based on myself. Although when I wrote that chapter chapter was one of the easiest chapter felt like Yup. I know this person I how I know how I feel when I was in this mode. And you bring. Yeah good point because it's easy to spot and others but we are telling a story in our head to rationalize our own self sabotage and exactly that for procrastinators Rasa who've been rewarded for procrastination. It's easy to be like. Oh I'm under pressure I'm definitely GONNA perform. I perform well under pressure. That's the narrative that's the reason to procrastinate estimate and of course we're going to dig into how can we self diagnose to stop this. It's so easy as we were talking about before. The show started to see it in celebrities to see it in others. But it's difficult to see it in ourselves and it seems to me like this is one of those things that almost everyone struggles with. Yes why do you think it's so common. Well I do think that sap sabotage is universal that we all have the inclination to sell sabotage. But it's really about what it becomes an issue you right if it becomes a pattern and I think people do it because even though they say that they want something getting there is actually really difficult. It's scary because change is scary. And so we say we want these things. But we had this approach avoidance conflict the closer we get to the goal. We all start thinking about all. The things are so bad once we reach their for example with health and Diet. I oftentimes find that people will get so close to their galway or whatever it is and then all of a sudden start thinking about how hard urges to maintain that and then they'll start to take a huge step back. They'll go on like a one weekend bench fast and then they'll beat themselves up and then it kind of sets them back for two or three weeks and even simpler simpler stuff where you started a diet. You're all excited than you slip once. And then you just throw the Diet out the window and it's very difficult to restart towards that goal when we feel like we've gone a little off course and I know myself I've sabotage on my health goals on my New Year's resolutions even and I feel like when you start to. Let's see the patterns in yourself which we're gonNA talk about a little bit. It becomes a lot easier to stop that before it starts exactly. It's all about being able to identify the patterns that you I'm no than what to do about it and somebody that we run away from that you know we don't want to deal with it. We sort of have this escapist or avoid mindset towards doing the self examination. So you do have to do that. And then you can have a lot of good action steps in the right direction and I think obviously with a new year everyone even chuckles about resolutions. Now do you think over the past few decades. We've come even further into our own way of self sabotaging. Yes I feel like your resolutions can be a real hotbed for people's self sabotage. Because you commit to this thing that has really tied to an arbitrary day and you know everybody else is doing the same thing and then the minute that you make a misstep up you start to look around you evaluate yourself against someone else and that can set you farther away from where you WanNa go. I've actually advised some of my clients and my friends if that's you just don't do a new resolution per se. Just do a goal. Did you go whatever. Why does it have to be January? I December thirtieth. You know. Just don't be so black and white about it. Because I think people get really really really fixated on this idea of. It's a new year. I don't WanNA blow that New Year but it's arbitrary a lot of these things that we think are common incense. We've never really dug deep enough to understand why they are. I always have this saying that. I've been eating my whole life but I've never really learned how to eat and toes in in my late twenties. No exercise didn't really learn how to do that until I was in my early thirties. So a lot of these these things we've been told we hear about them but there's an understanding behind them as a takes about getting interested and to get the knowledge so we then we can actually the implement these things so that actually mean something to us right and I think that that's a really good point. It's really about learning and sort of stepping back and taking that educational process process on and it is sort of a new thing. Because if you've never done that self examination you wouldn't really know where to start so you do have to start from the beginning but the good news is once you start Dan. You really have a prescription plan for how to address all of the pitfalls I come up and I think that's the scary part right the self reflection admission of guilt right. I'm the procrastinator I'm a sabotage that's really the hardest part for a lot of us as we hold ourselves in high regard you see it and others but to say okay let me dig a little L. D. Bre here and see what's going on the other thing I want to make. No this will go on with your point is people tend to look at self sabotage as if I'm dying to go back and do some reflecting to find out why I'm doing this then. There must have been something horrible in my past. That has led me to continue doing this. Now it doesn't have to be that at all. You could have been wrapped in bubble. Wrap your whole entire childhood. That will be the problem. There is no perfect way to raise. A child is just giving the child enough for it to understand that it's limited still need to grow after it leaves the house and to recognize deficiencies so that it can get to work on itself right. I mean growth is forever growth. Is All your life right and I think that sometimes it's difficult to take a look as you mentioned this admission of guilt. But it really doesn't have to be like that because as I mentioned earlier self sabotage is universal. So we're all GonNa do it at some point but if it becomes a pattern let's take a look at it so there's no shame about it. We're all wired to do it. In many ways biologically physiologically evolutionary. It's almost like something that was adaptive gets turned on its head because we all have to watch out for fears. You know we. We have to protect ourselves. But if that particular drive becomes more prominent than thinking about all the rewards that can come with you going forward and taking the risk that's when the self sabotage switch happens it's like all the fears of today though is not a physical fear per se. We're not running away from the Sabertooth Tiger. We're running away from possible possible rejection possibly getting somewhere slower than maybe your friend or your sister you know. All of these comparison that we do they can feel just a scary to us and trigger trigger that fight or flight the same way that a physical threat can think it's difficult for people to understand how easily that fight or flight mechanism gets turned on. We certainly have some fun with our clients in our classrooms With it so they can fill that but it doesn't take much for your body to flip that switch and in that moment which your rational thought process goes right out the window right when the fighter flight switch turns on the frontal lobe which allows allows us to be the human beings that thriving human beings top of the food chain species that we are. It's not really active. It's all the more primordial it just drive to get away from whatever scaring you and I think that that's what people don't realize like wow I couldn't logic my way out of that one yet because now center wasn't really working in in that moment and that fight or flight switch turns on so quickly and then people blame themselves for it but I always try to educate people who do you think survived from your ancestors the people who already learned mindfulness and we're mindful eating berries and didn't see that a bear came and was at the nervous. Nellie that we're always looking around and darting putting behind bushes but they were the ones who survived so in many ways it's in our genes right. It's in our genome that our ancestors were more of the nervous nowadays are probably the ones populated the earth and so now we have some of that and it's not a bad thing as long as we know what it is and know how to work with them. I get ten seconds. If you've been enjoying the show Oh and learning something of value each and every week. We'll your next step. Might be coming out for a week. Long residential program imagine diving deeper.

Dr Judy Dr Ho Pepperdine University Johnny consultant galway Todd Rasa Nellie professor L. D. Bre researcher Dan
"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

The Art of Charm

10:00 min | 10 months ago

"dr judy" Discussed on The Art of Charm

"More about these advanced social skills programs grams. Go to the Arctic charm dot com slash boot camp for more details and sign up for our newsletter. Now thank you everyone for tuning in. Let's kick off the show today. We have Dr Judy go with us now. Johnny and I loved her reason book. Stop Self sabotage six tabs to unlock your true motivation and harness your willpower. And of course get out of your own one way and we're super excited about it. I know all of us are working on our New Year's resolutions. So how can we stop that self sabotage. We'll Dr Ho's a clinical neuropsychologist zero psychologists and a tenured professor and researcher at Pepperdine University. She also works is a forensic expert and consultant and she's here to help us with just that. Hello Hello and welcome to the show. Dr Ho. It's so great to have you in studio with us today. Hi thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here. Thank you for joining us and of course yes. We enjoyed reading the book. It's a topic. That's near and dear to our hearts as we talk about personal development and changing yourself but we know first and foremost what made you decide to write a book on self sabotage you know I saw self sabotage in everyone around me so I'm not just talking about my patients. I'm talking about my family members. There's my friends my colleagues and even to a degree myself especially in my twenties and I saw that for me my main sabotage. Todd was procrastination. And there's always a way to make that sound really good in your head like Oh. I'm the kind of person who if I wait till the last minute. It's going to be amazing mazing right until it's not until the day when you fail a paper in your Grad program. which is what happened to me which really made me take a look and say? Was this really the best thing for me me but I mean I did that for so long and told myself at. That was the right thing to do to get myself motivated enough to put out my best work so now knowing that are are you the character procrastinates in the book or does that you write yourself so all of the character in the book are based on Real People that I've worked with or they were my family members or my clients obviously personal details change that they're not looking at this and thinking. Oh my Gosh Judy's writing about me but no I did not based on myself. Although when I wrote that chapter chapter was one of the easiest chapter felt like Yup. I know this person I how I know how I feel when I was in this mode. And you bring. Yeah good point because it's easy to spot and others but we are telling a story in our head to rationalize our own self sabotage and exactly that for procrastinators Rasa who've been rewarded for procrastination. It's easy to be like. Oh I'm under pressure I'm definitely GONNA perform. I perform well under pressure. That's the narrative that's the reason to procrastinate estimate and of course we're going to dig into how can we self diagnose to stop this. It's so easy as we were talking about before. The show started to see it in celebrities to see it in others. But it's difficult to see it in ourselves and it seems to me like this is one of those things that almost everyone struggles with. Yes why do you think it's so common. Well I do think that sap sabotage is universal that we all have the inclination to sell sabotage. But it's really about what it becomes an issue you right if it becomes a pattern and I think people do it because even though they say that they want something getting there is actually really difficult. It's scary because change is scary. And so we say we want these things. But we had this approach avoidance conflict the closer we get to the goal. We all start thinking about all. The things are so bad once we reach their for example with health and Diet. I oftentimes find that people will get so close to their galway or whatever it is and then all of a sudden start thinking about how hard urges to maintain that and then they'll start to take a huge step back. They'll go on like a one weekend bench fast and then they'll beat themselves up and then it kind of sets them back for two or three weeks and even simpler simpler stuff where you started a diet. You're all excited than you slip once. And then you just throw the Diet out the window and it's very difficult to restart towards that goal when we feel like we've gone a little off course and I know myself I've sabotage on my health goals on my New Year's resolutions even and I feel like when you start to. Let's see the patterns in yourself which we're gonNA talk about a little bit. It becomes a lot easier to stop that before it starts exactly. It's all about being able to identify the patterns that you I'm no than what to do about it and somebody that we run away from that you know we don't want to deal with it. We sort of have this escapist or avoid mindset towards doing the self examination. So you do have to do that. And then you can have a lot of good action steps in the right direction and I think obviously with a new year everyone even chuckles about resolutions. Now do you think over the past few decades. We've come even further into our own way of self sabotaging. Yes I feel like your resolutions can be a real hotbed for people's self sabotage. Because you commit to this thing that has really tied to an arbitrary day and you know everybody else is doing the same thing and then the minute that you make a misstep up you start to look around you evaluate yourself against someone else and that can set you farther away from where you WanNa go. I've actually advised some of my clients and my friends if that's you just don't do a new resolution per se. Just do a goal. Did you go whatever. Why does it have to be January? I December thirtieth. You know. Just don't be so black and white about it. Because I think people get really really really fixated on this idea of. It's a new year. I don't WanNA blow that New Year but it's arbitrary a lot of these things that we think are common incense. We've never really dug deep enough to understand why they are. I always have this saying that. I've been eating my whole life but I've never really learned how to eat and toes in in my late twenties. No exercise didn't really learn how to do that until I was in my early thirties. So a lot of these these things we've been told we hear about them but there's an understanding behind them as a takes about getting interested and to get the knowledge so we then we can actually the implement these things so that actually mean something to us right and I think that that's a really good point. It's really about learning and sort of stepping back and taking that educational process process on and it is sort of a new thing. Because if you've never done that self examination you wouldn't really know where to start so you do have to start from the beginning but the good news is once you start Dan. You really have a prescription plan for how to address all of the pitfalls I come up and I think that's the scary part right the self reflection admission of guilt right. I'm the procrastinator I'm a sabotage that's really the hardest part for a lot of us as we hold ourselves in high regard you see it and others but to say okay let me dig a little L. D. Bre here and see what's going on the other thing I want to make. No this will go on with your point is people tend to look at self sabotage as if I'm dying to go back and do some reflecting to find out why I'm doing this then. There must have been something horrible in my past. That has led me to continue doing this. Now it doesn't have to be that at all. You could have been wrapped in bubble. Wrap your whole entire childhood. That will be the problem. There is no perfect way to raise. A child is just giving the child enough for it to understand that it's limited still need to grow after it leaves the house and to recognize deficiencies so that it can get to work on itself right. I mean growth is forever growth. Is All your life right and I think that sometimes it's difficult to take a look as you mentioned this admission of guilt. But it really doesn't have to be like that because as I mentioned earlier self sabotage is universal. So we're all GonNa do it at some point but if it becomes a pattern let's take a look at it so there's no shame about it. We're all wired to do it. In many ways biologically physiologically evolutionary. It's almost like something that was adaptive gets turned on its head because we all have to watch out for fears. You know we. We have to protect ourselves. But if that particular drive becomes more prominent than thinking about all the rewards that can come with you going forward and taking the risk that's when the self sabotage switch happens it's like all the fears of today though is not a physical fear per se. We're not running away from the Sabertooth Tiger. We're running away from possible possible rejection possibly getting somewhere slower than maybe your friend or your sister you know. All of these comparison that we do they can feel just a scary to us and trigger trigger that fight or flight the same way that a physical threat can think it's difficult for people to understand how easily that fight or flight mechanism gets turned on. We certainly have some fun with our clients in our classrooms With it so they can fill that but it doesn't take much for your body to flip that switch and in that moment which your rational thought process goes right out the window right when the fighter flight switch turns on the frontal lobe which allows allows us to be the human beings that thriving human beings top of the food chain species that we are. It's not really active. It's all the more primordial it just drive to get away from whatever scaring you and I think that that's what people don't realize like wow I couldn't logic my way out of that one yet because now center wasn't really working in in that moment and that fight or flight switch turns on so quickly and then people blame themselves for it but I always try to educate people who do you think survived from your ancestors the people who already learned mindfulness and we're mindful eating berries and didn't see that a bear came and was at the nervous. Nellie that we're always looking around and darting putting behind bushes but they were the ones who survived so in many ways it's in our genes right. It's in our genome that our ancestors were more of the nervous nowadays are probably the ones populated the earth and so now we have some of that and it's not a bad thing as long as we know what it is and know how to work with them. I get ten seconds. If you've been enjoying the show Oh and learning something of value each and every week. We'll your next step. Might be coming out for a week. Long residential program imagine diving deeper.

Dr Judy Dr Ho Pepperdine University Johnny consultant galway Todd Rasa Nellie professor L. D. Bre researcher Dan
"dr judy" Discussed on No Ego

No Ego

04:30 min | 1 year ago

"dr judy" Discussed on No Ego

"Attaining and okay you want it to and and i agree that it happiness it's just not the absence of of those pieces and i think it's you only work with people who are leading change in organizations and they often try and show i change is important to the business but i think a shared accountability is if your employees that's facing some change at work that you have to do your own work of figuring out how it does or does not fit in with your own value system but even if it's that you've value being helpful to others it make you less resistance to change just because you want your teams do while i was once asked her to an activity that was powerful it was the beginning of a a workshop they asked us to choose some of our most cherished values things that we really felt alliance with and then later in the day much later in the day they had us go through and take a look at our online calendar and just try and look at where we spend our time and if they connected with those values and then later they put us through some other things that was always a senator and back to the values is what you're doing were where you're choosing to place the attention have clarity of my own values i ended up spending time on things as really frustrated with and it was obvious why i was frustrated because they weren't that meaningful to me even my values through either things other people want me to do or i felt it had to and that value driven way of pushing things can can really help with your orig- and saying no to the right things and saying yes to the right things so people you've got to one that your high love how you put everything into just very applicable lay people terminology that's why we love you on TV when there's some criminal case going on that you give us the the the common tator i'm view of what might be going on from a psychological standpoint are there other adjust things you wanna make sure you leave listeners with before we make sure they know everything amending it really just gives you a lot more clarity and can really organize your thinking and your life in how you approach things but you know i i feel like a lot of this also blueprint for change so it's a visualization tool but stop self sabotage activities and continuing to add to the resource every couple of days and so they'll be more and more resources questions perfect and that's at dr judy ho does the initials d. r. j. u. d. y. h. o. on instagram i'm a follower.

senator dr judy ho
"dr judy" Discussed on Directionally Challenged

Directionally Challenged

22:02 min | 1 year ago

"dr judy" Discussed on Directionally Challenged

"Stop announcement directions from Dr Judy Ho yes she is written a book called Stop Self Sabotage six steps to unlock your true motivation harness your will w eight whatever and then they feel better take okay and then so they don't go well the first thing that happens when you hang up that phone it was it was like a sense of relief like oh good hey yeah at the end but that's what okay so then that's why like your step four which is replacement not repetition because we do get stuck in the things that keep your hands or chew gum like word simple sophisticated adventurous however you dress the stylus at stitch fix can help you find your new favorite piece stitch fix is an online personal styling service that delivers your favorite clothing shoes and accessories directly to you I you complete a style profile than an expert personal stylist will send you a.

Dr Judy Ho
NRA in twitter fight with doctors over gun violence

On Air with Doug, Jen and Victoria

00:49 sec | 2 years ago

NRA in twitter fight with doctors over gun violence

"On the National Rifle Association and a Twitter fight over gun violence. It began with an NRA tweet chastising the American college of physicians for advocating tighter gun laws, including bands of assault rifles, large capacity magazines in three D, printed guns. The gun rights groups saying doctors should stay in their own lane that set off San Francisco Bay area forensic pathologist Dr Judy Melanie who read it as she was readying for yet. Another autopsy was incensed because this was the second. Autopsy I had done that week on a gun. Shot victim, thousands of surgeons pathologists and emergency room physicians have been tweeting photos of blood covered operating rooms, scrubs and shoes and the damage to the human body caused by bullets under the hashtags. This is my lane. And this is our

National Rifle Association American College Of Physicians Dr Judy Melanie San Francisco Bay Twitter
"Stay in your lane": Doctors fire back at the NRA over guns

All Things Considered

03:07 min | 2 years ago

"Stay in your lane": Doctors fire back at the NRA over guns

"A nerve for doctors, especially those who see the victims of gun violence every week. One of those was Dr Judy melanin, a forensic pathologist in San Francisco. I was incensed I was on my way into work. I was about to do another gunshot wound. Autopsy that warning. I had done one earlier that week. She responded quickly with her own tweet, which said minus curse word for emphasis. This isn't just my lane. This is my highway she's angry at the NRA for blocking attempts to research, the causes of gun violence research that she says could be used to prevent the deaths that she must investigate sometimes at a crime scene as family members of the dead watch her work, and she says doctors didn't pick this fight the NRA. Did they're the ones who backed the Dickey amendment that limits funding for gun research. And they're the ones who tried to pass legislation in Florida that thank God was overturned, restricting doctors ability to speak to their patients about gun safety, and that's wrong. They're overstepping their bounds into medicine. NPR reached out to the NRA for comment for this story. But did not hear back. Cedric dark as an emergency physician who works with the Baylor College of medicine in Houston, and he's a gun owner himself. I own a forty caliber handgun. I also own a twelve gauge shotgun and a little bit of outcomes. He says there are physicians who are NRA members who believe the NRA has gone too far. We're not antigun. We're anti bullet hole. We don't want. Our patients to have holes in them from guns. And there's ways that we can do that. Among those things dark says our background checks on every gun purchase and requiring a permit to purchase it done similar to getting a driver's license. And then making sure that people that commit interpersonal violence or domestic violence don't have access to weapons because guns in that situation increase the risk of domestic violence as cleaning to murder by five times another policy. Some doctors want to see is a ban on assault weapons. Ronnie Dixit sugared a trauma surgeon in Pittsburgh is one of them. She and her colleagues have been treating some of the people who are shot at the tree of life synagogue a couple of weeks ago. She says while mass. Shootings. Get a lot of attention. Dr see the every day gun violence in America, by group of trauma surgeon are made up of both Democrats and Republicans. It's beyond politics is as a public health crisis. And we wanna do whatever it takes to save live. What she doesn't understand? She says is why anyone would

NRA Cedric Dark Ronnie Dixit Dr Judy Melanin Baylor College Of Medicine San Francisco Dickey NPR Florida America Houston Assault Murder Pittsburgh
This Is What No One Tells You About Surviving Breast Cancer

00:41 sec | 2 years ago

This Is What No One Tells You About Surviving Breast Cancer

"Breast, increasingly these days women who are diagnosed with breast cancer in one breast do decide that they wished to have the other breast removed, and it's been a huge area of controversy in the media and among breast societies and women nationwide. That's despite evidence that the risk to the other breast is pretty low. So it can be a tricky landscape for providers who are counselling women. That's why Dr Judy Bowie and a team of researchers went back and surveyed more than thirty years worth of patients about their decisions to have the second breast removed, and whether or not to undergo breast reconstruction what we found was that people were relatively happy with whatever they decided to do. So her advice is simple. Listen to

Dr Judy Bowie Thirty Years