18 Burst results for "David Sedaris"

"david sedaris" Discussed on Kickass News

Kickass News

05:59 min | 3 weeks ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Kickass News

"David. Sedaris is an author humorous and regular contributor to the new yorker and bbc radio four. He's a member of the american academy of arts and letters and he's written eleven books including his latest which is a collection of his favourite essays from the past twenty five years. It's called the best of me david. Welcome to the show in car me that well david i. It's so great to talk to you again. And i have to tell folks what a gentleman you are because the day after our last chat which was probably about a year or so ago i received the loveliest thank you know from you and i just wanted to tell you how thoughtful and classy. That was a view. I th. I think you're probably one or one of two guests. That's ever done that. That was very impressive. When i first went on my very first book tour. I thought everybody did that. Surprise when i found out that nobody did it. You know 'cause like when i go to the bookstore right. I'll evan the bookstore. And i write down the people's names and i i don't know i mean i did it from the very start but i just again. I thought it was normal. It was just such a lovely gesture. In of course thank you. Notes in general are really becoming a lost art. Are you old fashioned in that way or good manners you. I did the commencement speech at oberlin. College last year The last year's eve actually have a commencement. I did it. And so i was trying to think. What advice do i have for. Young people mean what wheel advice do. I have to give and that was the first thing i thought of was right. Thank you letters because it just makes sense right. People like you think things to people who are grateful and and it doesn't take any time at all to write the letter but I'm just shocked by that sometimes. I'm just shocked that you know that people so many people don't do it and it works so against their own interests when they don't do something like that and again i mean you know especially if you're an older person right so when you're older person you think well you know they're busy and you know you make excuses for the person but then you think actually the no busier rhino and so and then but when it comes time to you know to send to write a check again or do something like that. You're gonna go toward the person's roque your beautiful. thank you letter. yeah. I totally agree. It always means something to me. And i always try to write a thank you letter. It's just. It's just a nice gesture. But i i literally you are either the only or one of two guests who's ever done. That's it meant a lot to me. I'll tell you that now. I recall from our last talk that you're an avid rambler and don't mean verbally but you take these very long walk every day We're at about six pm where you are on the east coast. I believe how many steps have you logged so far today. Let's see today. I have walked Thirty thousand seventy to thirty thousand two hundred sixty four. Wow so that.

David. Sedaris david i american academy of arts oberlin roque
"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

The Three Questions with Andy Richter

04:38 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

"It's ugly to me And and I know it exists but I don't know I really liked to ignored while there. I will tell you that as someone who's fairly active on twitter just twitter. I I was on facebook originally and then I just died. It was a the the lack of character. Limits like twitter has a character limit. So what's what's fun? And what originally for me with a joke writer as a sewing with lots of disconnected short little ideas it was especially when it was one hundred forty characters and I really found it fun to try and get a joke. That might have three different funny things in like like a funny image word play and then just a punchline all within one hundred forty characters and it is has been great for my other writing in terms of just economy. Really there's no its. There's no there's no room for excess in you have to really an and that's always a helpful thing. I think for writing you know but I also too. It's also been very good for my life. I've made a lot of friends and I do it. It can definitely be like a conversation in an outreach to people an ongoing conversation with funny people of a similar ilk to me someone whom I've never met face to face and then there is also that really really ugly shit of where there are just people just shit posters like to say shitty stuff about people and like to sit like people want you know when I was going through a divorce saying Kinda shitty things about me and a very vulnerable time when I have you know my families in turmoil. And that's like a reason to sort of kick me around a little bit and I you know it's just like wow that's really it's the anonymity it's the safety of it and it's just if you're mean it's a great place to be but it's also can be a great place to be if you're sharing and carrying you know. WanNa spread a little love. It can be great so so get on twitter. Really Stop Picking Up. Trash insert getting on twitter. God Trash I should pick gonna get on later man. I forgot my snare drum and Cymbal Hammett well David this has been a joy for me to Andy. And it's it's great to just catch up and I'm excited about you guys coming back to New York. I mean you know. I'll as a lot more likelihood of US hanging out there than there is an Kale. Yeah and we do. We Win Chelsea you earn like Twenty S. We would sixth avenue. Twenty six hundred eighty six between seventeenth and eighteenth and then we are on twenty-third between six and seven. Because I would go to those Christmas party. Yes that he would have your New Year's Eve party. Yeah yeah those are always so much fun and then yeah it's nice. I mean it's Nice I mean are really. We have a really great apartment. Now it's great. It's still a great place to be New York City and it's great great to see you and Hugh and and thank you for coming. And don't forget to check out David sedaris as masterclass on writing humor at masterclass DOT com. And thank you all for listening to this episode of the three questions and we will check.

twitter David sedaris facebook New York City New York US writer Cymbal Hammett Hugh Andy
"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

The Three Questions with Andy Richter

15:28 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

"So we do trust you but if you ride a joke about that and I am not aware that I'm not supposed to laugh at it. You will fuck me over because then I will be doing something bigoted and I just really just here to enjoy your comedy and I do understand it. I do understand it because there's tons of nuance and it is situational and there is like like this woman saying to you that about that. You know. There's there because there is difference. I was I was eavesdropping on a conversation. Between somebody somebody was at it was at Warner brothers and I was with an African American actor. A an Asian actor in me talking to somebody that worked there. Who was talking about? We're talking about credit cards being fraudulently used and this guy was talking to my goes. Oh it happened us a couple of times one time. It was this black lady down in south central. She apparently was getting all these credit cards and she was shooting people and then another time. It's his Chinese lady out somewhere like and I'm standing there with an African American and Asian person and I said to the when he was done telling this story I was like man. It was so important to know what what color everybody was. And what? Nash what what race. Everybody was and he just laughed and kind of shrugged it off but it was in that situation yet. Buddy Command look lick have. This was definitely insensitive. This was not like this. He was not the guy telling. The story was not trying to you. Know Battle social norms and break down barriers. He was just a kind of racist and and it is situational in like. Yeah in the story. You're telling about the exposure on the side road yeah. The the person's race is definitely a big aspect of what happened. And you know well it was a white woman who said why did you have to say that she was so anyway. I thought my explanation was because it's true. It's the writers world And that's always been the case and it's not It's hard it is hard though because we're trying to make a better world we're trying to deal with race in there and it's so complicated and there's so many pitfalls you know well. I wrote once an essay. My parents were landlords and then these tenants and my father. These tenants sued my parents right and and there. Was this really kind of aggressive guy that my dad rented to right and and it was a story about seeing my father A guy threatening to hit my father and so I thought it was going to be a fistfight between my dad and this guy and some people walked out and they said to the person in the lobby. The people in the theater a laughing and all the wrong parts. And it's like how who but it's what you're talking about thinking if I laugh like because then they're thrown into conflict because it's not a white character so if they don't like this person does that make them a racist. Yeah but if you don't like a bad person that make you a racist as as a bad person but again what you said you can feel the audience you can feel that turmoil And also what you said which is really true is what that really translates to as we came here to have a good time. And don't make us don't make us don't make us feel that. Don't make guys don't test me. Don't test my Whoa kness. Yeah well I I mean I I I I. I'm loath to be one of those comedians. It's like why can't I say whatever I want all the time? Because most of the time most of the time white guys that are just really Kinda pissed off because they look at their white comedy heroes of a of a of golden age of white maleness and they think those guys get away with whatever they wanted which included like really unsavory horrible things you know throughout their life and their current like how come. I don't get to do that and and it's just to me. It's the most boring brand of comedy that's out there right now is just white guy being like. I missed the boat on white guys getting to do whatever the fuck they wanted like you look. I feel like I don't know anything about comedy like. I don't know anything about COMEDIANS. Like if you named ten stand up. Comedians who are popular right now. I don't think I would know any of them. Just don't I don't know that much about that world every now and then I go on Youtube and I'll see you know someone in front of a brick wall L. Listen for a few minutes and I think that must be a really really hard life. It's not my thing you know have never was it was. I mean like with with amy your sister. I think she's in the same boat and she's been on this show and the key for everything for her collaboration. And that's the same with me. I say basically because I tried to do standard because it's available to me as an and in many people in my similar situation guys of my age character actors. Comedy People Improv people. One of the ways they can make money is like this. Do a stand up act. I've been in some movies. And they can put my name on the Marquee and I can go do forty five minutes in Omaha and make some money and bring it back home so I always kind of had that in mind and then I just realized I don't like this. I don't like being up here alone. I don't like saying the same thing over and over like that sort of the goal is to really just keep saying the same thing over and over with like minor adjustments until like now. I've really got it to where I can really truly say the same thing over and over and that just there's no interest in that I like how you said I can make some money and bring it home. Yeah Yeah I don't have to spend it all I can bring it home. The significance is like yeah. I'm not going to Omaha for the sites. I'm going there to stand in the dark room and got to make a living. I couldn't do it I couldn't but it's interesting because why do you think there's a difference between what you do and stand up. A piece of paper makes all the difference really. Okay all the difference in the world often I invite people to open for me right and usually it's a writer Have been in situations where I'm signing books and I meet somebody and we get to talking and it turns out that they right and maybe I decided to get an idea and I think gosh I bet this person's good writer and I'll say why don't you open for me. You know I'm going to be you know Kabul hundred miles from here three weeks from now or I'm coming back and six months and when he writes something that's like seven minutes long and and it's it's nice to give people a chance and the audience if I explained to the audience. It's a young person you know you've got you have to be generous towards sure. Young person destroying down a couple of times. I've made a big mistake in. Its someone's going on too long or someone's you know usually works out fine but I invite you to stand up comedian. Talk to open for me I was at. Ucla and I met him in Canada and he was with his mom and I really liked him. And I said I wanna you and it was just interesting because he was like. Has Anybody doing tonight? You know and he had the microphone prowling the stage and I'm just not used to that energy stage. I don't have that I would never come out in. Ask The audience a question. I can't hear you like what is this. Are you ready to listen? Yeah and every now and then I'll be introduced by somebody who does that and I just want to hose down the stage before I go out. I just don't like that energy in the room. I have always when given a choice when I have to go out on stage. I always ask for no introduction. I like to just Because a I don't want to hear what somebody that I don't know has to say about me not that I'll be offended but if if it's because if it's too laudatory it makes my skin crawl so I'd rather just stay a on the CONAN show every day when I come out to do the start. The announcement where you know. It's like it's the last thirty seconds before the show starts and we had a warm guy that used to he started the when we had a new warm up guy he the first day like hairy cons eh do and I just said and do not do not say my name. Just let me just let me step out on the stage. I don't need that sometimes if I'm I only signed book before a show and after Because I like to see who's in the audience. It's a good way to to do it in the lobby usually. Yeah Yeah but if I meet a teenager I'll say if I pay twenty dollars we use me. Oh Wow and then I say. Don't tell your parents because then their parents are sitting down near like where's chastity. And then chastity walks out the states and sometimes backstage in there talking like you know. They're so confident. And they're in the Drama Club at school and then it's time to go on and and they're just Aaron Payne and then we say all you can talk about anything you want to promote. Go ahead and do it. All you have to do is say. Here's David Sedaris. That's all you have to say anything else you WANNA do. You are free to do. It's just it's nice to have that energy backstage somebody who hasn't been in front two thousand people and they're going to go out there and I guess what you're always hoping for is the moment that they that they. They put the electricity into Frankenstein. And then he's going to be an awakening young person. They're like most this attention every day. But it's fun to but usually. Npr people they get out there. And they say I'm not David sedaris minimally And I wanna hear what comes after after that. It's good though that you're paying teens to do a task that they should keep secret from their parents. Yeah that's seems like good patent. I'm so honored that a teenager come to here and I'm sixty three now would come to hear a man their grandfather's age. Yeah read out loud. I'm just so honored that they came. Yeah that I I don't know I just and that's the way it was bring gifts for teenagers to and it's not much but it's something you never let a teenager leave the table without against. That's really nice now is that why do you think that like? Why do you think that is do you feel? Are you giving your teen self a gift? Are you or is it? Just it just because something that started when you started to get older no it started pretty much when I started going on tour. Yeah I think because you could give them a bottle of shampoo from your hotel and they don't stay in hotels so to them it something where to you doesn't really you know it's no big deal and then. I have a lot of things in my life and then sometimes somebody will give me something. You know it a reading you know. Maybe it's I don't know maybe Snow Globe or something. I don't you're GONNA cut sound like I'd but I I have a Kosovo painting like I don't. I don't really know globe but I'll write them. Thank you letter and say thank you so much. Yeah but then. I'll give this glove to a teenager not that night. I'll take it to another city trying to give it to that. Someone would appreciate the fact that the joy is being passed on as opposed to you just having a house full of junk that people have given you. Do people give you a lot of drawings that they've done if you not not for a long time. I mean they do do that and they sort of. Give them more to the show and there is. There is sort of fan art that I have a the EVA complicated relationship. I think anybody in the public eye does with with people's idea of them and it usually it's it was. I worked on a movie once where I was still doing the Conan show and I had to leave and so they there was they. Were shooting me out as a wedding scene. And they wanted to get a body double for me because they were just gonNA shoot me from behind so the first day. They brought basically like football players and they had polaroid's of football they took polaroid's of them with me next to me and I was like. Oh this is nice. And then they came back and then those guys were so great and then they just brought back guys. The next day it was like football players aren't exactly right. Let's just get some guys that could have been football players if they put down the fork and that to me. That's the difference in the Fanar. It's either kind of like. Wow I look good. They're like Oh my God. Do I really have eighteen. Only so depressing always say depression where people put a lot of work into it. And then you're like Oh my God thank you so much I know is that when I know I know it's also do you. Are you weird by the fact that somebody thinks that much about you to sit down and paint a painting of you? Yeah Yeah I mean I. Don't you know I'm I'm flattered? I'm flattered flattered by by picture but I'm flattered now. Is there anybody that you would paint a picture up like that? You're a fan of that. Would yeah better plenty of people in China. But I wouldn't paint a picture of. Yeah yeah and I don't know that since I know that.

football David Sedaris Omaha Warner brothers writer Nash Fanar polaroid Npr depression Kabul Aaron Payne CONAN China Ucla Conan Drama Club Kosovo EVA Canada
"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

The Three Questions with Andy Richter

01:57 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on The Three Questions with Andy Richter

"Is if here's something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals. Better help online. Counseling can help better. Help offers licensed professional counselors? They're specialized in issues such as depression relationships anger. Lgbt matter self esteem and so much more connect with your professional counselor in a safe and private online environment and get help at your own time and pace anything you share is confidential and it's so convenient schedule secure video or phone sessions as well as chat and text with your therapist. If for some reason you're not happy with your counselor though. You can request a new one at any time for no additional charge. Best of all. It's a truly affordable option. Our listeners even get ten percent off your first month with Discount Code three questions. That's the words three questions so why not get started today? Go to better help dot com slash three questions. Fill out a questionnaire help them assess your needs and you will get matched with a counselor that you will love better help dot com slash three questions. You.

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

02:52 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"Yes and because it used to be. You'd have to put a stamp on it and you would think. Is this really worth free to come? Thirty five cents and then it became free. Yeah and then so people's like I went and saw your show and I went to get a coke and I said I want much ice and they put a lot of ice in it here. I can't believe you're wasting your finger writing. Everyone just wants to be heard. It has really wild and not only. Is it free? I think it actually gets you some cloud or something people get a couple likes and look. Yeah look at you standing up for yourself. You you know And it's almost rewarded at this point for complaining. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just don't get offended me. No you on internalize it. No I get angry sometimes but I can't think of but I think you also I was thinking about it as you know. I was watching Your class and you were talking about how you observe people and I feel like when you're as observant as you are as good of a writer as you are. You always have to lead with empathy like you're not necessarily internalizing what people do because you're kind of seeing them as a character in a story you know that's usually how I'm able to get out of it That makes sense. It's almost like a non-judgmental. Meditation is how it felt like. It's Kinda thing to win you don't WanNa be formulaic about it. But I mean it seems like if you're going to give other people a hard time you kind of need to be hard on yourself well and so sometimes people are like. Oh then you did this on this thing and I didn't like you anymore and it's like well that's just a chance. I had to take because usually it's a worse things you can admit that most people can relate to That's wild and I do find. I started every now and then I've started responding to people who come at the only and I would say ninety five percent of the time. I'm so sorry. I didn't think you were going to see this. I love you so much. I didn't mean that sorry I was a Dick you. I think there's a little bit of like I just need to throw a rock at somebody to make myself feel better and then if you go to their profile you see that they do it to a lot of people and it's just some kind of addiction and adrenaline addiction or some kind of needing to be seen or pulling on people's pigtails her. I only meant that one comment about those cool. Lots and that detachable collar and that's the only time I've ever commented on anything on the Internet only time I love you so much. What an honor. Thank you for being here. Thank you so much for having me in your beautiful beautiful home. How Gosh what a dream your dream. Such a fan not going to try to not a good place down dream in a dream house. Oh My goodness I have to pee so bad..

writer
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

13:01 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"I like hardcore history to. That's that really. He puts a lot of work into it. I mean that's like a four hour sort of thing. He writes a lot but you got you would just it would be the biggest thing. Gosh I don't I mean maybe if I guess but it would be guests like this firemen that I know well that would be the most interesting. I want this guy in England. And he's like six seven and he is so handsome it doesn't he's a freak almost so handsome and women you know just just fall for him and he loves women and he he would be like the first guest on my podcast. And you're just. GonNa like we went to a restaurant together and he said this would be a good place to take birds. 'cause I don't necessarily hear British people say the word birds bird means hot hot girl or is that like our chicks bring chicks. Yeah Yeah but as a pejorative no no. It just won't be a great place to bring some cuts just old fashioned. Yeah bring some birds and I had. I don't know that I had heard and so. It's a cashier at the supermarket that I go to. This is already the best podcast. How have you not started this yet? I wouldn't mind her as a guest. Yeah I suppose but I think they would just be you normal people that I would have on it just so wild to think about. I mean morning edition. We're talking about earlier it had like about. It was like averaging ten million listeners. I mean that's three times as big as any scripted comedy. Show right now on television. Yeah but I went from. I think the biggest audience had had with five hundred. But that wasn't just me on a bill with other people oh allies are went from five hundred to ten million show. That was quite a leap. Did you know what the time when you were doing that? How many people never listened to morning edition? I wasn't was asleep then. I listened to all things considered. Yeah but to me. Part of having good life meant being asleep and morning edition was on because it comes on like I don't know what six or something starts so Yeah just a lot of a lot of people And it you know but I'm not even on it that much anymore. I mean I have a show my own show on the BBC. And I do that but I haven't been on. Npr In years But still people remember things from it which is nice. What do you watch? Do you watch shows or I told myself I can only watch any kind of a TV. Show if I'm on the elliptical machine. Okay so I put things on my ipad and then I go to the fitness center. Okay and I was alive or since I was last person to get yeah to get net. Flicks did last person. I've had it like for six weeks. And they're great shows. Talk here to tell you this. Or what have you discovered master of none? Yeah Yeah Yeah I think that's really good. Show What else did I got to watch the show friends. Is this new show. That just came out. Take place in the nineties peace and sometimes I'll start watching this show and then abandon it uh-huh then there's always another one to pick up. Yeah that's great. Yeah so master of none. You like your traumas. Y'All like drama. I like succession. Do you want my favorite challenge. Everybody on that show killer but which saves it is. The writing is so brilliant that you end up. Performance just unreal. Yeah really liked that I liked. There are a lot of shows that I have ideas. I mean I'm not a TV person but okay the walking dead. Yeah right like. I'd like to see Tom Eating somebody. Yeah okay so I stuck with the walking dead all this time but all right. This is a really good idea. There'd be nothing scarier if you had a choice between opening your door in finding a lion there or Zombie or finding a chimpanzee what kind of Lyon male or female fled the most savage lawyer and that was like wounded and hungry and a chimpanzee. Yeah I feel like I would choose Lyon because it would kill me faster whereas it would just kill you different. But the chimpanzee the thing the thing about chimpanzees killing people is that they would bite your face off. Like why would you start? There seems like a weird place. I like biting someone's head and if you're a guy they re your balls your balls all not go straight for the day. So here's what I think okay in the NBA apocalypse chimps escaped from zoos and they all formed big tribe. The out now on the walking dead. They don't have guns anymore. That's your enemy right there. Simps- chimps like could completely destroy every they can get over that fence with no problem. Here's the biggest question. Are There Zombie chimps? You wouldn't even Well Zombie chimp would just move like us. Ambi- so you got it. But it's the move fast moving and like that's such a good idea for this show over chimps versus humans like game of thrones chimps and humans. Please go pitcher. Show a roller sure. Just rip people's balls off to my master clock but sometimes I don't have ideas for that many shows but every now and then I think gosh they really need to hear from me. Yeah no I agree where that is almost as good as I remember when I heard the idea for snakes on a plane and I was like we should all just pack up and go home. A bunch of snakes get loose on a plane. I can't imagine anything more terrifying Hollywood's over pat up your suitcases. They did it. You can't follow that okay. But but chimps on ships on a ship chimps on a cruise a perfect ships on a train chimps on a cruise ship. That's the best idea we go over board immediately Did you hear that? This is funny. I thought Where did I hear this always on a on Youtube? Paul Lynn who used to be on Hollywood squares they and he was such a queen and when I was young no one would ever say they were homosexual. You looked at Paul Lennon. You just knew as a gay man you thought. Oh He's game in and they said to him if a man falls overboard and people yell man overboard what do yellow if a woman falls all overboard and he said False Bay Dad. Oh God I hope to see you guys in the comments that one. I've so much more to ask you but I can't keep you this long now. I'm just being selfish at this point. I have no idea what time it is. It's two am I miss dinner. We're both in a low blood sugar so good thing I got you. Actual sugar is one of your. Thank you gifts. I put a very weird gift bag together for you. I hope you like. It was so kind of you. I really appreciate now at. This is an honor. I we've had a lot of very fancy people in here and you are definitely the person that everyone has geeked out over. Yeah Gosh I never expect that. Everyone of completely geeking out And not only that but before you came. We're usually goofing off and horsing around and just being Dick cads on before you came over and was like really silent nervous panicky. Gosh that's so odd to me. I don't expect your legend new. I don't think is fair. If somebody accused me recently he said you know you abuse your power you know you're signing books and you abuse your power that somebody who ear comedian. So let's say if somebody told you something right and and it wasn't something about somebody else. It was like something that maybe something they did. Or whatever okay what you use on stage. Yeah Yeah Yeah. Yeah Oh so okay. So his point was you're taking the stuff people share with you and using it onstage as an artist. Yeah well you know my whole thing is is the second you come up and speak to me. All bets are off everything you say. And we'll be used in materials. Well I feel too that if you don't want me to repeat it then say don't repeat it and I got and it's not like I used a person's name or any rights so I don't I don't and I think it's different if you're Because like you said I one thing I feel the same as you is that I mean. I'm not a comedian but I mean you're always looking for things and you're always looking to connect things in your own ways looking for story and you're only looking for and it's I mean I think as a writer I mean it's sad but I mean you really kind of exploiting everyone and everything you come into contact with anyone but I do think people don't always like having Muir held up it's uncomfortable you know. Sometimes acute observations are feel like attacks. Simple but I've I but I but it just interesting. I feel like power so often is in somebody else's is like it's not in your own. Yeah sitting there thinking like on the most powerful person in this room. You're not you're just sitting there and you're so grateful the people came and they have. I don't know it's almost like they have the power because if they stopped coming true. You're nobody so you're not sitting there thinking I feel like a famous that way to like famous other people's idea. I'm not fame famous but I'm talking about if I meet somebody WHO's famous. That's something I'm putting on them. They're not it's my idea of them being famous. Become like a worship test or you project projects projection machine. No it's interesting. I mean I think you know and we've actually talked about this before on the show. I think it's Maybe Jim Jefferies was here about especially the stuff we talk about in the stuff that you know You know we write about. We TEND TO GO INTO RISKY AREAS. That trigger people you know. There was Jim Jefferies was on stage in Australia. Once he did a joke about suicide and someone ran up on stage and punched him in the face. It's this why will you pull it up? I think we've even live with. They punched in the face because he probably just walked into a Hornet's nest of someone going through something crazy. And you know I think a lot of times when we talk about things that are is this yes. He made a joke about suicide in someone just ran up on stage. This is before he got really famous and attacked him. Wow that person really is attacking a why. Don't you just never know what pain you're walking into you know you? Don't you never know what personality disorder? You're walking into or what mental illness or what. That's the thing too about it trigger warning because you don't have any idea what's going to set people off any that's right you know that's any idea and so I don't. I sometimes feel like saying if you have a problem with anything. You should leave but only while I'm here wait till I'm done. Wait till my performance is over. But I don't know that people are more sensitive now. I think it's just. It's free became free to complain..

Hollywood Jim Jefferies England NBA Npr Paul Lennon Lyon BBC Ambi Tom Dick cads Paul Lynn writer Australia Muir
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

13:50 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"For a month and `Romania instead remain anyways just for a month but in Romania are driver. Dropped US off at our hotel and said it's a pedestrian street is just up the next block. Well it was actually a mile away but my pins Lou. Let me said you knew where the hotel and when they said go straight and turn left I knew what they were saying because I write so I used it for Ivy's for Japanese and for Polish and for a while a German and his German the hardest to learn Your American I don't think so. I mean if you speak other languages area then you kind of get an idea like if you don't speak another language and you're like wait a minute. That noun has agenda. If you speak other languages you're you you know you've already got that part down. But what does that have anything to do with you? Asked if your goal Argentina's Ler yes right but I've noticed like with because I've used it for so many languages in usually follows the same pattern but the Spanish is like I'm sick. My mother and I are sick. The my entire family is always the doctor. Do you knew a good doctor. And they took your masterclass. That's a good question. But they're just but the other languages no one says I never learned. I'm sick and Swedish. Because they've healthcare. Well I guess you'll never have to ask this but you're just expected to get to drink contaminated water in a country where you speak Spanish. Yeah third base. It like MONTEZUMA's revenge. How do I deal with the fact that I can't stop shitting like the first question they teach? You know it was just really kind of racing. It really is interesting because I beat the German one was meaner than others really. And it's like I learned to say on and understand you. Why understand you and then you say why. Because you don't be German like they know. None of the other languages are confrontational. Yeah but the German was like you're arguing with a waiter tennis like that's not right. You still own me like fifteen euros but they didn't you know in Japanese. You never argue now or no. That's so funny but also the Spanish I think was done recently because it's only one that has taught me the word email. The other ones are like you have a telephone dodger. Fax Machine. Yeah Yeah Oh that's why holds. That is so telling but in the country like a few go to Romania like I was in Serbia recently and I said who your immigrants and they're like nobody like nobody comes here. No Syrians Syrian. Refugees like a Syrian refugee wound up in Bucharest and then he thought he was had made it to Austria and they said no your new mania and he cried put shoes back on and he had walked like eight hundred miles from Aleppo. And so you go to a lot of these countries in eastern Europe and and everybody's white because nobody wants to immigrate there what Serbia like. I saw a banner with pictures of of young men on it and it was and I said I said well they killed in the war and driver are hired said no they is all kidnapped by Bainian. 's who steal parts like maybe some alcoholic need liver? Maybe somebody somewhere need a kidney. And so I said Oh I said their organs were harvested. So I'm like giving someone in English lasts and you know but but that's the phrase you're teaching them. Their organs were are America. We know we have a word for this billboard. 'cause they were missing no because they were killed. Kidnapped and their organs were harvested and they died and so they would just put on billboard. Just thank you for your service or no is just like. Oh this is sad. Oh God yeah. Oh bummer and then I went to Bosnia Serbia Bosnia nevertheless children to a hotel that was out in the countryside and it was like a village of yesteryear right so they had farm animals wandering round but they had like artificial streams and then they had you know those bridges that are like half a circle that go high over the water that were covered with. Moss and wet leaves and they had no handrails. No My friend. Patsy FELL DOWN. But you can tell when you're in a country that doesn't have a word for lawsuits. Oh Gosh and also it's interesting to go to a restaurant twenty twenty and the all of the people next to you at breakfast or smoking. Oh because brooches so not used to that anymore or when someone doesn't even ask if you want a nonsmoking room right like they don't have any non smoking rooms. I think I was in. I WANNA say Kentucky. Last year performing in someone was smoking inside and it was such a trip to see. I think that might be the last state where you can still smoke inside or at least in comedy clubs or something. There was something kind of sexy about I kind of this on you. How quickly that all changed when we were going to have a friend who I travel with a lot and so I just writing essay about this so I've been going back. Justin diaries but We're going to go to northern Macedonia and she found us a hotel and it was like the best hotel in town. And under a manatees. It listed toilet paper. You know you expect like a twenty four hour fitness center and SPA Business Center while the paper Water Macedonia and will not put on the top of my list. If that is a luxury I'm GONNA ask you a couple more things before I let you go. You need to leave. I know I'm going to fight tooth and nail to keep you as long as I can. You made this observation wants that. I just love so much about how when you learn animal's name you make a judgment about them so you don't ask people pet's names or else you would make judgment. That is so fascinating to me. That happens with children. It's so true I mean they have someone come to get a book. Signed and I'll I'll sign joy even like children just one son. Keven K. E. V. but my favorite was driven which sounds like the past past tense. Have drive like we were driven to the restaurant. Make a judgment about a parent. I know too because I'm like yeah. Asshole will name their kid this. Yeah it really. It's loaded. Yeah it's so wild. And where do we get that? Frahm just are sort of in our hippocampus. We have judgments about names from people. We knew already had those names. No weird stereotype again. No I think part of it is you know like the whole Atticus Thing I grew up in North Carolina and so in North Carolina liquids. Your mother's maiden name. This is wild and a lot of people might not believe me. But my dad's name was Eric Comings. And my mom's was patty coming And they got married so it's coming Cummings Okay because your name inbreeding there. I don't know but that was that. So it's coming and cummings my mom's maiden name was coming with no us because often in the south your mother's maiden name would be your first name So there was a formula to it but then people started thinking. Gosh what would happen if I took Stephen just changed it to a k. Keven sounds good. And so these these bullshit name. Soo Much moonshine cropped up. And that's what's you know. This has been always interesting to me. And it's really hard thing to you and I spent Thanksgiving with this Trans Woman last year. And she seventy and her name is Madison. Now there's no seventy year old name Madison. No but it's like with Caitlin Jenner. That's a young a young woman's name as well. Caitlyn so you never meet like. She didn't think ruth no Bonnie Bonnie Dot net. Audie really interesting that you can't be an eighty year old kaely no you can't and that's why when you're working on something The name really matter the name of a person really matters because name is gonNa tell the reader how old that person is and sometimes what area there from So many things but I also find that there is also even with the normal names now. People are doing these creative spellings. Sometimes I'll go. Yeah signing books and it'll be Ashley and they'll be like no. As H H. I'm like no but a lot of times you ask. It's like the mother allowed them to change the spelling of their name. The parents did when the kid was like fourteen. That happens a lot and you should never never allow child to change their name or the spelling other name because when they're fourteen because that's when you make the worst decisions of your life. I used to look batteries when I was fourteen. I shouldn't be making any decision. You go back to North Carolina. We have a house on the beach there so I go there one. Go To my dad's still in Raleigh. So you know I'll go and see him. There's a wonderful comedy club outside. Raleigh Kerry Kerry. Yeah Yeah right outside. Yeah I think it's an Improv. It's brand new. It's gorgeous Because I grew up in Raleigh so I met somebody awhile ago I was on book tour am at somebody else in North Carolina and I said where do you live? And he said I live in carry and he thought it wasn't familiar with North Carolina. And he said that's like the Beverly Hills of Raleigh. There is not a beverly hills. There just isn't like there isn't a grant village of the Soho of raw not one. It's amazing I guess the last thing that I want to bring up I I was so you know we talk about addiction a lot on this podcast and something. You said In the master class that was so touching to me that I had never heard it. Put this way. I've spent so much time and I talk about being Alanon and dealing with family members that are alcoholics and addicts and stuff. myself Identifying essentially as an addict you said something just so simple and I think it's so important for all artists and just people in general to think you set on a Lotta. Alcoholics are good people. Yeah do you remember saying well? I wrote a story about my mother's drinking and my mother was a really good person who was an alcoholic who couldn't stop drinking and it didn't make her a bad person it didn't make her a bad mother It just made for a sad story. You know when you think that somebody because maybe I'm wrong but I don't think you can be that happy and being alcoholic speaking as someone who's an alcoholic I just felt trapped and I just felt like I was sinking and I just felt like there was no Every day was the same you know and and a lot of days are going to be the same sober right but there's still a possibility that it can be different when you're so if no other reason if you drink you drink that much beer. You can't go anywhere no because you gotta P that's right like every three minutes so you can't really go anywhere and then I would get high on top of it and then I would be paranoid and I couldn't go anywhere and I don't know it just it and I think about that all the time like how great it would have been you know. My mother could have quit drinking. Yeah just how how much better her life was because it was just an unlikely she wasn't like that all of our childhood you know it just got for aggressive. And but we loved her. Yeah and I never dow that she loved me and it was just but I don't I don't feel the need I don't know I don't I don't i. Don't judge her for it. I just did you spend time learning about the disease of addiction or you knew in your heart. What about my mom? Yeah.

North Carolina Raleigh Romania Serbia Keven K. E. V. Lou Ivy Bosnia Argentina Bucharest Europe Madison beverly hills Stephen SPA Business Center Austria twenty twenty Patsy Moss
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

15:30 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"Absolutely not absolutely not N Even I am not spiritual. You're not spiritual. I'm not spirit. Her and when people yeah no I'm not any of that even when see even when Shit hits the fan? Are you a person if something goes wrong you start going? Hey God just check in and I went to Dr a year ago and he said You have cancer and I did not say anything to God interest. I don't have cancer and that. Maybe that made it easier if it had been an accurate diagnosis. Yeah I mean I you know I did feel sorry for myself. God was never mind. He's not going to check in. We'll all I ever asked. Is it my cancer? Be above the waist. That's all I ever asked right because I don't want people imagining like wouldn't it be awful to have rectal cancer and then you're embarrassed to tell people what kind of cancer you have to add insult and yeah you have to think about my cancerous. Yeah because then people go magin. What kind of plumbing thing going on? And and then it's so unfair the of cancer and then you don't get any of the benefit no none. No one feel sorry girls out by you so this was bladder cancer right then. So I thought I'd make myself a new one out of one of those goatskins sacks that people drink out of when they go to Greece you know when they're a teenager. I don't know why you can't make a bladder out of a goatskins sack. I'm sure I mean but it turns out I'm okay and he was. The doctor was wrong. He was just wrong. But what's crazy is he led with that while I said I will urinary tract infection and there's blood in my urine he said said we probably have cancer bladder cancer. What yeah the bladder cancer or you have prostate cancer and then and then come back in like three days and we'll run some tests and then I'm back on the street and everyone's waiting for that day and I thought wow I didn't know today was can be that day but it wasn't worth read here. I never going to go see a red headed doctor again. I actually I've so much compassion for redheads. Because when I went and froze my eggs I started looking at sperm donors and I got really nitty sperm donor sites. And I found out that maybe it's just certain companies but these sperm banks don't accept sperm from redheads. It just broke my heart. And that's not fair. I mean I would label it you know. I'd label it Viking scotch-irish website sperm from red hat heartbreaking. They'd like don't even bother awful. Really upset me. That really is imagine going to try to donate sperm to you know. Try and help a woman who plus you know. I think maybe people are if you put Prince Harry on the label prints at the different. Does the redhead. Yeah but he's a good looking God yes. He's a really good looking redhead. Strapping Yeah yes. So maybe people are thinking other red heads you know. Maybe there just aren't enough positive re Representation True it's like a royal. Redheads is a different kind of DNA. I would say. Isn't that sad? That really upset me. That made me want to just go. Buy Some redhead sperms to feel better. Someone really wants to quit smoking. I told myself that I was allotted a certain number of cigarettes at birth and that I went through them all and if I smoke more slowly I would still be smoking but I insisted on smoking two packs today so I went through them all. And that's it. I can't and I do the same with alcohol. Like there are rooms will of alcohol you know like beakers that would be like the size of this room. And they were like five allotted to me and I am Gadol five and it's like sorry efficient and it really helped. That's incredible most people who quit smoking. Quit like many times before. It's a history of failure but never tried to quit so I had no history of failure so I think that made it easier is well. That's really intense Someone really wants to know when you were a judge. On Repulse dragway. Was it scary? No everybody who worked on that show with lovely. Every single every single person on that show is lovely and they made you feel so welcome and I didn't want to say anything bad about anybody because this is their dream right and they don't know who I am and so who am I get up there and shit on their dream but they didn't make me say anything bad you know. I just said good things about the people I liked and they were all fine with that and it was. You know as a big fan of the show. So I'd seen every episode not just once. I'd seen every episode many times. And Yeah everybody and then. I ran into rupaul months ago in London and it was frieze art fair and I had tickets to go to one part of it and there are two parts of it and I WANNA bother him. Didn't expect he would remember me so just with a friend Disquiet Laney said David Sedaris. Where do you think you're going? There was so nice and I said well. I'm going to this one. I don't have tickets for this. And he said well come with us. You know we have. We'll get you in. And he had like some super. Vip that is. You're thinking okay when we get in there what's GonNa Happen to why we in and he said okay kids you're on your own and I thought that is the perfect way to handle that. Yeah he really has really. Just you know a really lovely person and I just think it's so great when someone is completely themselves and and the world says great we we really especially when you wouldn't have expected it like in your youth. He wouldn't have expected that someone like him. Who's being completely himself? The world would fall for and I can see how that really gives hope to so many people not necessarily drag Queens. But just you know anybody who who you know how you can always spot a phony like now and it's like responded in writing to when somebody's taking a political position that you think that's not really you're trying to please me or you're just trying to get always always tell when somebody's not being honest that way In never spotted a moment of that in Rupaul. And there's also something about seeing re Paul in the world. It's like seeing giraffe. I mean there's Times that I've seen him walking into something and it's it's like he's in his own. He floats down the street. I remember one time my son walking into a dinner party with He was an all white and a bright ruby red bag. And it just like you're just such on such a different level but it's like this divine floating deity into a party you know it's very intimidating to just run into Rupaul. Well like I said. I didn't expect him to remember me and so I didn't want to. I don't know I didn't want to hold them up or anything. That was so calling him. You know another person who's kind and I just always I think about this all the time. I'm not comfortable on TV. And really I feel like you're always so good on talk shows. No it's not doesn't come natural to me but I did Jimmy Fallon and Reese. Witherspoon was on. She was the main guest and I always take my friend and these daughters on TV. When I go. I've known him since they were born. And we spring with me and at the time the girls were like twelve and thirteen years. Old and Reese Witherspoon came to my dressing room with a bowl of nuts. We all had a bowl of nuts in a room but she acted like these were present from me and then she. She saw the girls and she says girls. Do you think we get a picture together. And the girls never would've asked and there was such a classy things so do it. Yeah I was thinking that she didn't have to do that she didn't have to. She didn't wait for the they again. They would not have asked and it was just such a classy thing to do. That is such a cool thing to just get ahead of it because they would never. Oh that is just so cool. I even tried to now. Take someone's phone because I think sometimes you see someone all of a sudden when they come to take a picture. They don't know how to use their phone. All of a sudden I just grab it and just take it so that I know it's going to be good lightings going to be good and you know how do you Reacting People WanNa take photos of you like having my picture taken in at bothers me when people take your picture like you're a statue you know like they don't ask you think oh that kind of bothers me. It just seems really rude to me right so if somebody comes up and says we get a picture. I say I'll draw a picture and I'll pull up my notebook and I'll say draw a picture of us together and I'm happy to talk to people but I just don't understand what the picture means. Yeah roof that they say they want proof but I just so interesting someone was like. Do you think someone's going to think you're lying right if if you say you saw me. Do you need the proof? Are you a just a liar? Normally well like I ain't heard Kevin Hart. When he was on his book tour he took pictures with people but he he just stock selling books right and then took pictures with people and I guess that's what people wanted. Then they could get a picture of themselves or put it on their instagram account. But I don't know I'd rather talk to people and I'd rather I'd rather do it that way. You know very famous comedian. I know Used to say you know. I won't take a picture with you but I will talk to you for five minutes and not one person ever took them off on it. We just want the photo. Wow that's interesting. Sometimes people get really mad. When you don't want your picture taken and I and then I don't you know it's like when somebody comes up to get a bookstore and they say I want you to write keep laughing and I say you know what else in the book because it makes it sound like. I think I'm funny. Yeah and I I wouldn't I wouldn't. I just wouldn't do that that so a lot of people ask me like can you flick off the camera. I'm like no. Why are you making me look like an asshole? Now I look. Why are you making me a jerk in this photo? Well I'm sorry but also you're the professional. Yeah I mean you're the funny person and the relationship. They came and paid to see you right. So you know and so okay. Let's say you say to me. We right keep laughing. Okay and I'll say no I want but I'm like I'm happy picture. And let's say you know what actually. GonNa draw you don't you and they say I have a sister and I say I'm just GonNa draw your sister but I mean a really good way. My sister does shave. All that is the most horrifying very perky tits great nipples and calls. The chemicals are a little rough or she albouy boots. Can you believe? I'm with to art school yes I can. This is like like genius. Oh no she had a knee injury. She had a bad injuries as a sports in two thousand torn. Acl He'll he'll but she had some badge. Rejuvenation I think. And then what are these? Are they just floating nipples? So no that was just I was. Just. That's nothing we were talking earlier and I just can. I keep this and of course last couple questions I know. Do you have to leave tonight? No no I'm I'm here to do I'm going on television tomorrow. Ooh Chow Jimmy Fallon Jimmy Kimmel. Who's a lovely person is the best Sloven And then I show got cancelled because of weather in northern California's optical make that up and then it just going to do a show in Vancouver and then go back then. I'm going to Argentina. Oh Nice for vacation. Oh are you vacationing like good at taking the time? I'm at work every day on vacation but I'm going with an old friend of mine. So how many days We're going to go for a week but we're GONNA go to Argentina now. This is a hard thing. Okay C. H. I L. Chile right. She sound like an asshole. When you say Chee Chee Lay chilly. Chilly right you're an asshole. If you say your trash if you say that Chile you're right you're saying right so I'm going to our candy. Ci Late Tom. Being eight little y displays. Wow that's sexy always go sexy went Dow- just be sexual and then I took Spanish in high school and I'm boning up my excuse me. Excuse me Sir in this climate. You're GonNa talk to me like that. I'm I'm and I remember a lot of words but some trying to refresh myself on my verb agreement and things like that. But you know it's been that's a really great conversation starter to like this morning There was a fellow in my restaurant. And I said I said Do you speak Spanish? And he said yes and I said how do I say I'm looking because I remembered I'm looking for my friend. And this is how I say it and he said no he say it like this and but it's great because it's really everyone's happy to do that everyone's happy to impart their knowledge. I think yeah no I think so too. Are you listening to tapes or some kind of refresher tapping which one pim slur? But it's interesting because I've used Pym slur. Whenever I go anywhere I saw I went to Sweden and I studied Swedish..

cancer Jimmy Fallon Reese Witherspoon Chile Rupaul Argentina urinary tract infection Greece Prince Harry Repulse dragway Chee Chee Sweden instagram California London Dow Queens Tom Paul Disquiet Laney
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

03:11 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"The lights are crazy but fast forward to the show. I WANNA see the robot redtop show all these robots start fighting each other. It's so cool. This goes on for like two and a half hour. It's the wildest thing I truly ever seen in person. It's the only thing that's ever made me want to put my phone down and be present. We always so interesting to me that You know when you live in the United States and you hear this is the greatest city on earth. It's like union to get out more often. You know a lot of competition for greatest city on earth out there right. You know always in Sweden recently and Swedes. Not everyone is like this in the world but Swedes raised to believe that they live in the best country on a and that they're the best healthcare and they have the best this and that and it's interesting to go to another country and realize that they're told the same. That's true thing that you're told but I think so many people and it's just you know and I understand it you know. It's expensive to travel. But they really need to get animal more. Yeah what is your favorite city to visit Tokyo? Second Ferret I like Well I like all of Germany I take pretty much you can go to Mannheim Germany And still spend four hundred dollars on postcards. Oh Wow Germany is is the the world capital of really good postcard really when I say good postcards? I mean joke postcards like cartoons on a postcard and it's all in German so I don't understand it but it doesn't matter you know like does this one that I got and it's all these. Nudists eating hot dogs outdoor cookout and. I don't know I don't know what it's about but the drawing is fantastic and I and sometimes you go like if you go to. The Art Institute of Chicago took by Postcard. It's like the printing the paper now. There's so they're not good to send Iran but they're a good thickness and I'm always happy to buy postcard because I sent so many and I go through them a lot. I mean you know. It was the first like joke in a square. I feel like that we had an instagram. You have like a little meam. That's like a little joke. That's really what a postcard was even New Yorker like if New Yorker Postcard New Yorker cartoons were postcards. If I were especially if I were not American I'd buy those by the thousands. Yeah because I because it pretty and you understand what they mean. Perfect look for in a man. Actually another question I got for you. Are you religious? And do you pray?.

Sweden Germany Art Institute of Chicago United States Tokyo Mannheim Iran
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

04:00 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"To go on and I was GONNA say. I don't think she meant it and I was gonNA say as a flaming homicide. I haven't get burnt out on these tours. Stop adding fuel to the fire and it was one of those things with your followed by traffic report and then the weather report and then by the time you get back to it. It's all forgotten that she said burning question. Shit God that makes me so happy. I hate myself that I love it. So much It really Tickled that in your master class. You said one of your big comedy. Inspirations Swampy Goldberg I saw Whoopi Goldberg's Broadway show on a video tape of it and I bet I watched that thing. Oh I don't know I must have watched it fifty times and and what was so great about it which she did these characters but you would be laughing. And then the next second he would be like like punched in the stomach and she would just turn on hair and and whenever people. I don't know I won't put up with any criticism of Whoopi Goldberg. None none went on the view cried. Lost it I mean just loved her so much start crying on air filed she I said something about her in the New York Times and then this box of cookies showed up. I was in Sussex. It was hard. I don't know how she got my address and shipped I immediately and then she said if you're New York let's go out. Let's go out and have dinner and so. I was going to be in New York for a few a few weeks. We went out to dinner and I'm not good about meeting people but she was so gracious that she took all my nervousness away from me and was just lovely but the waitress was from Romania And I said to the waitress at one point I said. Oh I just speak a little Romanian. I said but it's filthy when I'd say filthy. She said say it and I said No. That's okay and she said say it and I said no it's really bad and she said say it and so I said it and what it is I shit in your mother's mouth and then the waitress is like why would you say that. Why would you say that to somebody and I said we asked me? And then we'll be like. Wow what's going on with her. 'cause we're talking you know somebody had come up to you know. Say hello to her and she'd and all of a sudden I've alienated the the server at this restaurant. But she was that Broadway show that she did and it really. I've been writing for about. I don't know I'd been writing for like probably seven years by the time that I saw it but I was just writing in a diary and I hadn't written really written stories yet or essays or anything and it really had a profound impact on me because I I watched it and I thought that's what I want I don't want to perform. I don't want to memorize anything. I'm not an actor. I just WanNa read out loud but I wanNA make people feel like she made me feel She also is so incredibly kind Last time I did her show. She dragged me into her dressing room and forced me to pick one of her shoes to take. She collects these fantastic shoes. She has the made I'll show him. I'll show you. I still have them. They're like in a shrine in my closet. And was you're taking these? You know she just is like the kindest biggest hearted person and also just the most relentlessly authentic have you seen on the view that she just farts whenever she wants. We hope she will review. And they'll air it. I mean they don't even she doesn't even care. Which one is this? When Claire Danes on watch those.

Whoopi Goldberg New York New York Times Claire Danes Sussex Romania
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

05:55 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"From Moulin Rouge smoke but look who would you be in? Mount? Maya okay. No Pink Pink. Pink wasn't paying you you you. You'RE GONNA do. Yeah Pink. Would you be Christina Aguilera? Yeah I know you're obsessed with Christine Aguilera. Just fine ran. He's so funny because no one can sing like that and yet she's still trying to coach people on anything. She was match the master class teaching. You how to say she the best singer do you think I think that. She's a voice of our generation. Like it for sure but she is. You would say she's going to go down in history as like. Oh Whitney Houston boy. I think she's definitely the best singers around. Wow I mean don't you? I don't know anything about seeing me neither but that doesn't mean there is science behind. Who's a good singer but like I'm not listening to her for the Science I listen to. I can hear when Houston and go like Oh shit she can go a little longer than anyone else that must mean she's great. You look like you know when they do that thing with the Grind Day. What's don't sleep on Hudson Jennifer Jennifer Hudson a weight watchers book? Because I know some good singer if they can singer Whitney Houston's on So if someone covers Whitney Houston Song. Oh they must be in. It can take us that and make me like more the economy. You're GONNA be a good performer. Not a good singer. Yeah but I'm a lyricist so into lyrics okay. We can't end on that anything else. You have to say for yourself or myself anymore announcements merchants emerges coming. You guys seem excited. We're GONNA work on warmer. Let's get through this ideas. We're just trying to by the way we are selling march on the road in Benton doing it. Yes that's all I know when we're GONNA sell merge on the road we're going to our twenty two cities and Benton in the lobby afterward. The show with a bag full of t-shirt. He's with a suitcase out front. Please don't ask him a question pending you. I love it. You think that this is going to go smoothly. It's going to be. It'll be signed aries. I enjoyed Houston. You've worked in March before I worked in retail for sure and I could Hawk Hawk anything. You're just plus. I really like these things. We worked very hard and then I believe in them. I just WanNa make sure that it's time effective. I'm wondering when you get into like. Chit chatty mode and be like oh. Did you also want to shirt? Sorry Yeah no you. GotTa get real. I'M GONNA get real guys. I WANNA get there. You're you're GONNA behave and I'm like I'm real. I'm real right now. When he told me. Just get real our interview. Today is a real treat. You miss this interview. We had a dog emergency a real emergency. This is the Great David Sedaris. This really strenuous genius this. I mean you know David's I don't have to tell you Famous for his pieces on this American Life. I mean they're legendary His Master Class. I watched his masterclass. And it frigging changed my life and I mentioned it. It sounds like I'm doing an ad for masterclass in the interview. Only between your mastercards and your master class it sounds like there's someone off camera like electrocuting me to make sure I save master class but I really. I watched it and I got. I've really been into benching. These masterclass things not fun and paying me. I just love it. And he said so many incisive smart and he's so fucking funny. It was also just so nice for him on the podcast because there is no walkman x shells he just went for it. He's the kind of funny. You can't mimic either like original on here where you're like. What where did you get? That I don't his mind is done. It is a marvel. Never anything about him. Go by any book. One of my favorites are me talk. Pretty one day dress. Your family and Quarry Denim was very that was a big one Let's explore diabetes with owls. I like that one. I have a whole bookshelf. Full of debris Jenner's Calypso's Calypso. Think of little dark and funny and I really liked that. That's your brand when you're engulfed in flames the one with the skull on the cover Squirrel seeks chipmunk and I say townships Dongtai squad took not Santa Linda. I mean there's too many to name I mean it's endless. During the interview I was on antibiotics and also while I was talking to him. You know what? I'm always worried that I have dried lipstick on the corners of my lips. We did a job and so it was David Sedaris here and I was so nervous. And by the way also pacing around the house like a like a girl waiting for prominent so but I didn't. Yeah I stress and so I was so nervous about having crusty nasty like smashed lip that I scratched my lips with both of my fingers. Cut My lip could taste blood during the beginning of the interview and then sort of covering my mouth so that he didn't think I just had like a stigmata that I was leading from the fucking love phase. So I think this is. My my audio might be fleet because I was covering my mouth the entire time because he didn't know I was also sick and not about and I was like if I get David Sedaris sick I will never forget myself so my audio might be a little bit weird because I had a full on psychological front of David Sedaris. I was so nervous. But you're gonNA enjoy it guys. We've seen all that to say that you're gonNA love the episode. Yeah so I just want to get to know the like Info behind. I'd never met him before so I didn't start the episode with our refunds because I'd never met him and I was just a big Fan because she knew the answer. I I knew the NPR. I know I know who I am. Okay enough is enough we go me selling merge I'm real up when he comes back scribe. Wow yeah that's right. Late subscribe comment. Don't right elephant. You're trying to.

David Sedaris Whitney Houston Christina Aguilera Houston Pink Jennifer Jennifer Hudson Moulin Rouge Benton Hudson diabetes Santa Linda NPR Quarry Denim
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

11:14 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"Never coming back from going. I because the thing is about New York drives me nuts. Everything is so expensive but also if you need a toothbrush. That's like an hour ordeal. Go out you gotTA fight crowds of people to get the dwayne Reed and stand in line for two hours like just to go to get. A toothbrush is an ordeal at the hotel. What have them if you lose paying eight dollars up to you? I don't I don't i. Every time I go to New York. I feel like I'm being robbed. Everything is it's Gordy dollars in New York. I bring my water. I bring food. I Ramon cereal. It is. Yeah I am like a apocalypse prevalent ever since impact as many underwear my Lai Pak underwear doing each day and highs. It's get swampy out there. It's so humid. Walk all that walking. I looked at change my underwear a couple times a day in New York makes me feel like I'm in control something that's the thing is New York. I have no control over it and you don't you have no control nor nor nor nork nor Newark New York controls you and that's why it's stressful. I don't like anything you try to control control. You know the big apple I like. I do like a herding dog. I like to. I like everything organized. Like when I'm in New York I'm like everyone was all go the same direction like I want to start directing traffic. Like I'm like guys okay. What side of the street or we got like 'cause everyone's just slamming into each other like shut up persons are hitting you in the face backpacks or cussing you like. It's just so intense and I just WanNa be like guys. Listen up if people wanting north on the left side of the street and the people in this low budget faster like I just WanNa organize everything and get everybody in line but that is really never know headphones on so no one can hear anyone but you know you you just blend and you're just shouting on the street yelling at everybody and I look like just like a crazy person but the honking doesn't fix the problem guys. Oh my God. The honking in New York really adrenalizing me and also it. Just as a very. It's I don't need to make this about gender but it is hard to be a woman in New York and function. I'm that sound sexist. But I just mean like lip gloss like hairs on your lip gloss like you gotta wear search. I always have blisters in New York always blisters. And one of the most heartbreaking things I'll see in New York as when you see a woman walking like five thirty and then she stops on a corner puts a gym bag down because you always have to five bags walking around New York. Everyone is like 'cause you have to have all your shit you know your baggage or literal baggage and you're emotional baggage because you know it's like if you go to the gym after and then you go out. It's rare that you can go home between things so everyone's got like just strapped with backpacks and like hockey bags and shit. So when you see a woman in he'll stop on the corner take her heels off. Take out a pair of sneakers and change shoes. And you're like a little prayer for her. Honey honey honey honey. I just want to pick her up and carry. Squeeze her tight because you're let me now. Is You just starting at what came? I stare your women changing their shoe and the feds. You're fully can't calling women get there when I'm staring at these women taking their shoes off. Nothing turns me on more. Well no I mean. The plot thickens on my sexuality Yeah I just New York is just hot for me. It's it's and you know I don't do what was sounds and you do need intense quiet to sleep so. I bring my noise cancelling headphones. But you'll be in New York and you'll hear like four. Am You'll hear a woman screaming and you're like do I. Do I go help this person? Do I just allow this to happen like should I take some video in case the courts? Like what do you do when you are on the tenth floor? You hear woman just screaming at the top of having a good time like I just. It's a lot of decisions you have to make every second according to the movies or stick your window shut up. Shut up. I Jimmy Fallon tomorrow. Also you sleepwalk don't do it naked. God thank God. You're not sleepwalking. Don't sleep well I if I slip slept walked sleepwalked in New York. I mean that would be horrible. I'd probably make a quick buck but thank God. You wear that three piece suit. You guys don't know this but Whitney sleeps in the full suit. Choose a three piece suit with a combine hat a small cain limits. Nick get knowing all the video she post you. Just see her. She's under that. There's a wet suit spanks circulation in your GRANDPA. Shit like it's a fool is sleep in fully closed. I L YOU I. I dressed like Annie Hall to go to bed. I wear a little blazer flannel blazer. I wear flannel pants and flannel shirt and socks. Diane Keaton is like your sleep. I do by the way also sometimes sleeping a Bra. Because you gotta you know you can't really let those things just flop around for eight hours when you're sleeping you can come and I and I sleep with A. It's like a jelly strip. You put on your chest so that you don't get wrinkles between your boobs and away to blanket and Amanda Way to blame you know. I do wear masks about headphones. Loves the sunshine. John bed too. It's a lot of problems. It's getting ready for bed. Is a good fifteen minute ordeal and I put so much oil on my face before I go to bed that I have the Luba up. I do sleep a full suit I ca. I do not understand people sleep naked. That is that's nuts to me too much. I don't want to wake up in my day. First thing in the mirror like Oh shit I'm gonNA wake up and be like Oh look at me with this big slander on it and I could you imagine what I mean if I like you would sleep. Thank you but if I woke up I saying. Welcome to my bathroom like here. We go preparing myself. I have never served in my life. I've pretended to sleep naked for guys I've been dating. I'm not even joking. Because guys are very ended. Our Reverend I would lie there and falsely and I'd be naked and like get up in tip toe into the bathroom and change in my full suit and then go to bed and then wake up at like seven. Am and then take off and go back to pretending that. I slept naked the whole time. I fun you didn't know you slept on your blue man. Con My chimney sweep costume Yeah no I if I slept walked in New York. That'd be real so if you're in the past Kim parked sleepwalked slip. What slept pockets now? It I mean we're supposed to be passed. The teaches people better vocabulary. Let's leave naked today. Not Worry about like trauma happening in the now. Well Yeah. That's the other thing you can be ready so you don't have to get ready for. I am any point. Ready to you know. Go to the emergency vet or officiate. Your wedding I could do literally anything a two in the morning. We're filling in for the monopoly man. I can play Willy Loman in death of a salesman at any moment. I like to be prepared. Who knows I mean? I did have a lot of times when I was a kid. Ride to like. Get out of bed quickly. You know in bode well if you're sleeping naked in some some night bug crawls up on your balls either. I think that happens. We eat a bunch of spiders. Every cockroach or some a cocco chronic krone upon. I don't do cockroaches fuck with people's face. I don't know 'cause I'm asleep when there is to sleep with car used to have cockroaches. Oh No the first apartment. I had an L. A. As soon as you turn the lights out you would hear. You'd hear them and then I tell my landlord and he goes. Those aren't cockroaches are water bugs. I'm like dude. I don't fuck what they are but they have wings and they're like five pounds each they're disgusting and they're huge enough flights. You know they don't give up. Fuck do they're like locusts. They hit the wall. And it's like Oh they're hard. You'd like tiny early prehistoric. They have survived some all share. They owned this apartment. I'm so sorry. All right we have to get to the wisdom of the podcast wisdom guys ready for some hot wisdom now that we've just been drilling on hot wisdom of the pot so. I actually put a lot of work into choosing the wisdom of the pot of the week and this week is one of my personal favorites. You Ready. We still have a side effect if it's hysterical. It's historical if it's hysterical. It's historical if if it's hysterical. It's historical love it. It's I know hysterical like not funny therapy. If it's as I thought I I mean. Look it's probably should be like emotional by the alliteration makes it kind of a sexier adage you remember. Yes if it's hysterical as historic which basically just means if you have a large reaction to something that's rather small or if the punishment doesn't fit the crime this could be old. This could be historical. You know I've done this a lot. We talked about when Brennan job is on the podcast the time that I had a full meltdown at the comedy store over. Something so benign. It was very clear that what was going on was historical. One of the COMEDIANS. Talked about like you know getting a new girlfriend or whatever it was and I was just like you need a class it up like it brought up like old stuff from my childhood and it was old and I realized that right after having I was sorry guys that that was that was. I'd just traveled back in time that brought up that unearthed. Some old pain and it came out on you and I'm sorry and or you know when someone's yelling at you or freaking out about something or and you're like this can't be about this. This is clearly something old so it's a good thing to carry into work. When someone's freaking out over something when you're like okay this person's being hysterical. This is probably historical. It's probably as the Salem witch. Trials is the old dam. Like I remember one time I was at dinner with this kind of famous person. It was a couple of famous people and we were in Hollywood and I believe look everyone has. I can't tell you how to pave how to tip but I tip usually twenty-five percent right. What's more or more or more but I think that is usually what I will personally do. And we're all sitting at the table and the check comes and we have all split it and that's always a weird moment when you're trying to figure out like what someone else tip Larry. David did a whole episode on this. Where you're like. I don't want to tip less than them..

New York dwayne Reed Lai Pak Gordy apple Jimmy Fallon Diane Keaton Salem hockey Amanda Way cain Whitney Annie Hall Nick Newark Hollywood Larry David John
"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

Good For You

01:38 min | 9 months ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Good For You

"To say you don't need to worry about the corona virus. Don't do the only person that's taken this stance. Here's why look I know. It's obviously terrifying. The media loves that Click Bay. They love it. They keep saying like you know corona virus deaths go up fifty percent that could mean it went from two to four fifty five zero. Yeah fifty sounds like fifty people died. It's their manipulating numbers to scare US free. Because out not that. We shouldn't be careful obviously as his terrifying. It could get worse but as of March fourth when this podcast comes out in America ten people have died right and I am just seeing people so stress. I know we should always be prepared. Be ready so you don't have to get ready by everyone's like oh you gotta wash hands. It's like yeah but don't you think we should be washing our hands even if there's not a we're not washing their hands. Now you're washing your hands. I gotTa do it just so many people that are like now. I'M GONNA wash my hands after I go to the bathroom. You should have been doing that. You're cooking dinner here tire life. But I'm just gonNA share something that helped me calm down a little bit. Because I was I was on Amazon. I was buying masks. I was mind the LYSOL wipes because we're about to do tour and I was getting very paranoid but then I read something on average one hundred fifty one six hundred fifty one thousand six hundred people every day influenza in the US six hundred and fifty people die drowning. Eight hundred seventy seven people like.

Click Bay Amazon influenza US America
"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

04:11 min | 1 year ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

"Well, it had David's tumor written on it. I think they knew what it was at the level of a college refrigerator. This is this is Coney yogurt mind David's tumor. But I think like if I lived in Florida, okay? Which is very likely. I think it would always be worth it to have a baby c could throw the placenta to gator. So now in cater with love percentage. So worth it to have the meaning then fathering being a mentor to this child and taking adoption. I just do it. So I could throw the placenta too. Well. I was excited to come in this morning and get the opportunity to talk to you. And I have a lot of gratitude for that. Because I'm an enormous fan of your mind. And this is a huge treat from me. Gosh, it's street for me to and you know, that's another thing. And I knew you came from a big family. But I think that's another reason that we could be friends. I always feel like people who come from big families. There's something in common, you know, Sarah, thyr and wife. Yeah, he comes from a big family. And I love the thyr fan. I love how you meet one. And you can tell that you're talking to a thyr my God. Yes. Yeah. It's not that they they do resemble each other. But their voices are like, but they just have a sensibility. That's similar. I love meeting people in big families who who who have that. And I think too I feel so bad for people who only children I think it's really important to be able to hide in a family, and I don't think. That glare. I don't think that attention is healthy in any way to get that much attention from from apparent. I just don't think it's good for anybody. I just got back, you know, from the holidays a while ago. And I so much about my life is we do the podcast the show. There's the the big Conan logo on urinal cakes at the office. I mean, it's just ridiculous. And I'm Anne. And that can get toxic. And then you go home, and nobody cares. They don't care. We all gathered around and they make fun of me. And I'm the butt of jokes. And you're right back in there. You're having some of the same arguments you had back, you know, twenty years before with the same people, and there's the same alliances, and as, you know, shifting alliances all the time, you know, it's fascinating. But incredibly comforting to go back and just be part of a larger unit again, I feel bad for with back pain. I feel really bad for people with Crohn's disease. But I think I feel worse for people who hate their families. And who say have got Christmas outta my goodness survive. I just think that something so fundamental to to to have gotten the short straw there. I feel so grateful to to just the to be related to people who I'm just crazy about. Yeah. Well, this is a nice we ended on a sweet note. We did. Is there anything I can mention it will help you in any way you so don't need my help. But anything like, you know, tuna David sedaris is you know, has a new sweater collection that he's putting out there. You know, David has a line of jewelry anything at all. I can mention that would help you in any way. Golly, that's awfully nice of you to offer. But I can't think of anything they're doing more of the same doing again say that well by far whether it was mentioned it to my wife, or anyone I ran into today who knew I was going to be talking to you. If you could just know how much their faces lit up and how excited they were four. Me. That's a nice thing. That's a nice thing for you to know. You've made a lot of people very very happy David sedaris, what a thrill seriously. Thank you very much. Thank you counted. Good, man. We just ended with a firm hint shake..

David sedaris Florida Coney Crohn's disease Conan Sarah Golly twenty years
"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

02:44 min | 1 year ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

"That's fantastic. I absolutely love that. When I go through your work. And I've enjoyed you work in the past voice thought, I I really do feel kinship with David sedaris. And I do think that there is a lot of similarities here, and then occasionally I'll hit something where I think God. No, he's completely unlike me, I would never do that, for example in calypso have this obsession with having a benign tumor removed, and then you wanna feed it to a snapping turtle. Isn't that correct? Yeah. No, don't you say. Yeah. Like, and I always don't don't don't you just gave me this face of you just gave me this face of. And your point is as if I said, yes, sometimes they get hungry, and I go through a drive through window, which your problem. I always thought that if you had your tonsils removed your cat would want to eat or if you put your time for in cats bull your candidate. And so I had this tumor, and there was a snapping turtle. I was going to feed regularly. Our beach house, and I thought I'm gonna feed my tumor to this napping. Turtle bet he'd like it. And the doctor said, I'll cut it out of you. But you can't have it. It's against the law for me to give you anything that I've got out of you. So I was complaining about that on stage when nine this woman came up and said, I'll cut it out of U N delay keep it just a doctor this, by the way, I read the story. And this is unbelievable to me. Please proceed. She's doctor. I'm not a surgeon. And I said, well, that's good enough. And she cut it out of me and she shipped on ice North Carolina NFL into a snapping turtle who loved it. Yup. Okay. This isn't something anybody does first of all you let someone perform surgery on you who may not be qualified certainly has no access to the drug profile. You let this person a Cup this tumor out of you, then so you up as ever called in in the story, then it's shipped to North Carolina. You couldn't find the turtle for a while. So you kept the tumor in the freezer. That that I I was with you with if someone removes something from my body, and I did have my appendix removed ahead an emergency appendectomy when I was in these sixth grade on I remembered asking him if I could have the appendix, so I'm with you up to that point. But I didn't wanna feed it to a turtle that crosses the line. With me. I was willing to eat it myself to readjust my own proteins, which I think is vastly more normal than your weird compulsion to feed it to a turtle. But you kept it in the freezer is that mean, the people were opening the freezer and saying a what's that put that can I can I put that on my ice cream? And you're like, no, no, no, that's my benign tumor..

David sedaris North Carolina NFL North Carolina
"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

01:42 min | 1 year ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

"Hi, my name is David sedaris. And I feel apprehensive about being Conan O'Brien's front. Back to school. Walking. Hey, welcome do Conan O'Brien needs, a friend. This is the show where I pretty much get to talk to people have always wanted to talk to maybe fish to see if they would possibly become my friend. It's kind of a dream come true job. I love talking to people. But this is a chance for me to do it in a form that I just really love. And of course, it's not just me. I'm aided in my quest by my trustee assistant sonum of session high. You're not you're not you're not a hostage. I you're you're here your own free. Will they use you didn't say, hi? So I was I was interface should jump in and say, hi, I I'm sorry, so bad isn't this kind of a dream gig? For me, I will say that it is I love to talk to people in depth. And all joking aside. This is lovely. It's really fun to talk to them for a long time. And everyone I'm talking to these are people that have interviewed them before. But for five six minutes and the throne to a commercial for Viagra here. I get to talk for forty five minutes and then throw to a commercial for me undies also helped out by my trustee.

Conan O'Brien trustee David sedaris forty five minutes five six minutes Viagra
2 journalists killed in North Carolina when tree falls onto SUV

Morning Edition

02:39 min | 2 years ago

2 journalists killed in North Carolina when tree falls onto SUV

"This is npr news from npr news in washington i'm dave mattingly the national weather service is issuing flash flood watches and warnings from the florida panhandle to virginia because of alburto it's now a sub tropical depression four to eight inches of rain are likely over a wide area near tryon north carolina a local tv news anchor and a photo journalists from station and south carolina were killed while covering alberto when a tree fell under their suv the ground of course he's saturated has been for a significant period of time it was a large tree it sat back off the road a good ways that's jeffrey tenant the interim fire chief in tryon he says he spoke to the two journalists minutes before they were killed the officials in hawaii say the kilowatt volcano continues to shoot ash into the air and lava into the pacific bill dorman with hawaii public radio reports kill the way it continues to erupt with plumes of acid at summit shifting winds are pushing ashen hazardous sulfur dioxide gas inland toward more populated areas about twenty miles away lava streams are pushing into the ocean but at a slower pace wafa also crossed into geothermal power plant but civil defense officials say the affected wells are stable and secured dozens of buildings including many homes have been lost lava flow since a may third eruption on the big island trading resumes today on wall street after yesterday's holiday i'm dave mattingly in washington on the next fresh air david sedaris returns.

Washington North Carolina South Carolina Alberto Tryon Hawaii Wafa NPR Dave Mattingly Florida Virginia David Sedaris Eight Inches
"david sedaris" Discussed on Q: The Podcast from CBC Radio

Q: The Podcast from CBC Radio

01:59 min | 2 years ago

"david sedaris" Discussed on Q: The Podcast from CBC Radio

"This is a cbc podcast discover what millions around the world already have audible has canada's largest library of audiobooks including exclusive content curated by and four canadians experienced books in a whole new way were stories are brought to life by powerful performances from renowned actors and narrators with the free audible app you can listen anytime anywhere whether you're at home in the car or out on a jog the first thirty days of the audible membership or free including a free book go to www dot audible dot ca slash cbc to learn more last week on the show you might have caught david sedaris reading one of his new essays from his upcoming book calypso do you know david sedaris is david ayers is sort of a public radio famous storyteller he's the kind of storyteller who's got this endless well to pull from he's he's always on this show that's on america public radio on the cbc every now and then called this american life he became very famous on that show he writes a lot about all sorts of strange and funny things that he's lived through his books really hilarious you're gonna to hear the chance to well you're going to have the chance to hear a lot more david sedaris and just a couple of weeks he's going to be here live in studio talking about his new book and no doubt we're going to get him to tell you a few stories but we thought we'd give you another quick one right now this is david sedaris giving you his very own non band q road story i was on tour probably about ten years ago and woman volunteered to take me to the airport and i had done a show in davis california and the airport is in sacramento so i get in her car and she starts telling me about her daughter who is in wheelchair and the woman thinks her daughters lazy and so she's got a lot to say about her daughter and she talks entire time which is fine by me i think it's interesting so we get to the airport and i said she drops me off.

david sedaris david ayers davis california canada america sacramento thirty days ten years