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Eliza Skinner - Don't Beat the System

This is Gabriel Sunday. And we'll I'm here. Because at this moment, we need podcast news more than ever. And I'm sure you're thinking. We have Audie Cornish jut up abroad, Michael Barbaro. But are they really enough? Does Terry gross. Jon levin. I needed jaffrey's bring you all the stories, and maybe you say Syra Canuk Lakshman Singh. I regress there enough. But then again, are they join me as we bring you the stories you've already heard, but you want to hear again in a different way from the center for investigative journalism. This is the Sunday show. I'm Gabriel Sunday. See you Sunday previews drop November eighteen and full episodes are available Sunday December ninth on star. Burns audio. Dan, j was here. Unaware they lacked. News breaking down his epic fail. His half on this day. With cobos. Bonnie. Around. Hey down is working another episode of dumb. Population relation scanner Skinner tau. Okay. Hello to our show to the town. Thank you for bringing your wonderful improvisational energy to us EVS. Glad to be here. Usually you give it on leash. Yeah. Today, you're unleashing limits. Because of another improvisational skill barks at it or a car goes by is to run into the streets gun shy. You understand? You haven't gotten your improvisational abilities fixed yet? No it to be, you know, like wild and free in that sense. But in the summertime so Vermont's when there is like it could be heat that does about winning newish perform, that's the way got intended improv. Okay. You'll let it run away for a few days. But you know, it will come back. Exactly, you leave home and then come back. Do you often? See like the trail Mark of just across the top of the couch by your front window of your improvisational skills. Running back and forth. No, not so much. But I do see little footprints from outdoor wild improvisational skills. And can smell and they're like. Ooh. Yeah. You gotta be careful for the outdoor wild improvisations will fuck with what you have knows that. Diamond line, right? I always tell people that like for a long time running that was one of the best nights of comedy that you could get in this country. It would be like Douglas movies, seven comedy, bang bang at eight thirty and then diamond lion. After that usually paired up with like sometimes like, I think Facebook a couple of times different things. And then they moved us to Friday's. That's used a night run for a long time. There was just. When I first moved here. Let's do it. So good. So so all right. Well on this show, the world's getting dumber. The world is getting number notch us on the show. But this show the world the world is actually getting. Moses feeling. And the only way to combat is through comedy. We get wonderful stories sent to us by our beautiful fans. There are dumb boots on the ground. And they find the stories and they send into in. We'd street team stupid straight teams. Okay. This is why we brought you here. All right Cilicia was for right now. We have Elisa skinny here, Dan. I don't know if you know that I do. Okay. She's here under a store. Yes. Jumping by calabano at I don't know if it's Caliban or kale beano C A L E V. I N O aliban Caleb. You caleb. Kayla vino. He's very he's the Brian Eno of surfers. Yeah. I'm going to read you the headline. Great of this series of horrible decisions starts in strip club. Sounds like my life star. No one does not start a strip club, by the way who goes to his job club to make a series of wonderful decisions. No. I mean, well, unless you're like, you're you're taking a shift you've like been making a bad ones. Like what I want to sit in it for awhile. Getting better. I the have this buffet the back of a VHS that from blockbuster and like ninety. Yeah. But nobody is ever like. So I went to the strip club last night the morning, we came up with here. For aids says the headline one more time, and I'm gonna do the final line. Okay. Back of the VHS. Okay. Series of horrible decision. Starts in strip club. See Thomas how stars in taking it off? VHS is come up with knockoff movies that came around the same time like were hung Overton night. Yeah. It's like, it's not. It's like it's not a sore part. Get me. Yeah. I would watch dinosaur bar sounds like they're just having picnics doesn't. Dinosaurs frisbee catching because they'll along. T-rex? He can't can't just come on. Man. I can't get it. Dang it throw it. Again, your coverage say reach for it. Oklahoma man paid a visit to a strip club at three AM. He makes it seem like it's like his grandmother that he needs to stop in on look. She just got to make quick visit their ministry of the girls. Make sure everybody's okay. Once again, this does not sound like where the bad decision started. It's not like you were like set my Allegra where he watched Roma, and he was like that was right. Club. I just wanted to see wherever he was before. This was like looked as watch was like, well, I gotta go drop on the strip. Sorry, guys. You'll hope feeding these people without me. No. He's like doing CPR on someone who's dying. What time is it right now on the first has its two fifty five three more pumps to the chessmen. Gotta gotta release some stress. Police said that bad decision set in motion bizarre series of events that resulted in him running naked down a country road. Okay. True. I mean is that the worst decision, right? Like if you're going to run naked down a country, I'm assuming we're probably at like six AM or so by them. The right time to do it. You know, kids going to school. You're not reading. Goes to me that is if I live in that community. This is the thing you yell at your kids who are doing a little thing wrong that to show. Country but going to touch that going to a strip club, and then running a bunch of miles should be like its own exercise movement called crossed it. Sklar brothers. Thank you, all of your anger specifically. Send a little bit of it to allies Skinner. A love good Twitter interaction. Because it never happened enough. You never get enough negative interactions woman. Online people really give you the benefit of do respect to let your jokes. Stand was enough. Favorite twitter? Joke of all time. Morgan murphy. She goes she tweeted out before Twitter. I didn't realize all my jokes had answers. And half the time. Real fun is when they they respond telling you what's wrong with your joke. And clearly didn't understand some of the words. I don't know. What that word means? We're learning a lot about you. I was in a car accident, and so many high assumes a fan of the show, but still I was just not in the mood, just unpick alone. I was in somebody's preemptive framed it up better. He wrote. Yeah. Maybe next time don't run a car like that get yourself something like an Escalade. So that when you don't when you get side swiped. You don't go flying all over the road. Also what happened, and I wrote I wrote you seem to assume a lot of shit before admitting. You have no clue what you're talking about. All in one tweet. Yeah. Yeah. It was like you list. All these. How do you? I rented a car. All these things. And then goes also what happened he's manic? He's a mix. Just imagine view or a woman. I mean, I don't want to blame. Things you can do magic. Or woman or be kept from doing? That you're like what is this about? I did what I don't understand what women are going through better than the three guys or team. What women want? Making a sequel to write already did they did make this tragedy on what men want? She can suddenly hero all men's thoughts. And I was like oh come on. And then by the end of the trailer. I was like, I'm so. A witch. Agreement movie, which is like I'd like to have sex with you. I mean to me that is the most dude joking. That trailer is do you want some tea? Right. And then she goes, I thought black people stopped doing that. And get out came like. Like it was like oh great joke. Hinson is a witch in the air. Don't. Oh. Senate my way, the man told police that he had been kidnapped by two men during a convoluted robbery that started after he went to the gentleman's club and officers were surprised to find history strange account largely checked out. How often are these stories just pitches that you guys are leading into the world. In writing up. Yes, we need to make that Scott mail. This story Sandberg is already on board. Artists to country, rather, actually, I think they did make this movie. Thomas holiday. Oh, yeah. Down in Mexico calling. They're calling them gentlemen's club. How many gentlemen are in there like real gentleman? Yes. Pardon me. Does Bill that drink? You'll get it on my spac good, man. It's been so long seat. Watching crystal. And two. My lap. These Wycliffe on that after about an hour after going to the strip club the man joined a dancer, he just met at an all night diner. I'm gonna tell you right now. I could get behind this. What a great scene. I know got that late night diner light. Hopper. Actress Strang to show her darker side, Shaleen Woodley or somebody. Police they'd been kidnapped right because about an hour after going through club. He met a dancer. They went to an all night diner. Called mama loose perfect. Now, it's a musical because that's a number, mama. Nightlong? My lose get what you are even juice juice serve Jews will serve Jews. But don't serve Jews on a plate. Right. Yeah. Bring a Jew juice. Juices bring ju juicy. Momma lose is where the pair struck up a conversation with two men later identified as William traits and Philip told us they tried Tillis gentlemen. Yeah. Yeah. Netflix. Innocent man know, what you need to be. Why you started it yet? And this is it about making dessert because I'm probably not going to want. You great British baking show fan. I haven't heard of that one. The best type of show, but someone. Anglophile big bread fan. And I love when they take pictures of you know, English desserts that you've never heard of before. And then craftily draw them into a does drawings. What if you're like, I love that? But I've never heard of the Great Britain. Why should watch cooking in this country, but I've never heard of the show competing, but like exporting everybody while doing yes. So they meet up with William traits and Philip toll us a love and bad people in your story have have bad people. Yeah. But you wanna go transit or you can go Bill, and Phil billing. An appliance, right. Also makes them more friendly. We're. They strike up a conversation with two men later dentist. William traits Philip Tillis in the parking lot. Now, they don't highlight that as one of the mistakes in this night mistake Guan don't get into a parking lot conversation don't ever get into a parking lot commerce. And also like aren't you like on some level? I feel like that is the moment for a guy going to a strip club to connect with one of the strippers and go have like a mid. This is their meet cute. This is their meat. And so now, they're doing this thing don't engage with other people at that point, you know, parking lot. Now, you've Richie the highest level of strip patron and made a friendship you made a friend. Yeah, I'm interested to hear what the in line was like what how how did this? This is in the parking admired the Jeep that the two men were driving and one of them said he had others for sale. Now, look went to the strip club at three. So it's we gotta be pushing four thirty five. My friend to go to do you think he's showing off in front of the store for like that? Jeep. Oh, you got more for sale. Yeah. Yeah. Got got a bunch of Jeep money. Tell me about your GPS. I'm I'm in the market for Jeep or what if it turned the other way where he said to her at the club. You got a really nice ass. Okay. And she really appreciated Jeep then. Gentleman. Dowdy set at that way. Fourteen American Eric you've got you've got a really nice and got a really nice. You got a really nice as and then later, she thought that was the nicest comment she'd ever heard then later they're walking on the parking lot. Any turns those guys you got a really nice Jeep and she realizes wait. You say that everybody. Yeah. So it's not a special anymore. And then she's kind of having a moment. Okay. Yeah. Well, he tells the two dudes Bill love that cheap. And let's say four thirty seven AM they say cool because we got more for sale where that came from all four of them went to a storage facility in Moore. Oklahoma. Okay. Where traits and tola insisted on patting them down for safety purposes before going inside one of the locked units. You have made a parking lot friend a or not saying they have to Pat you down before you go in their storage in. I'm going to say, I think good rule for life. Is you can't beat the system. Don't try to beat the system. You're confronted with a situation where you're like. Ooh. I can go around the system and get a cheap Jeep. Please but dot com. Don't try to beat the system who is parking cars in a storage unit. Like, you can't know also what does not without a human body inside of like that's where corpses. Go think. He's having the greatest night ever. He went to a strip club. He made a friend. He had a great diners keep he's doubling down at the craps table, this let it rely of St. Martin's the jerk too. Yes. Exactly. Once they were inside the victim said that Bill and Phil started laying out lines of cocaine. Okay. Turned the well, we know what we're into here. I mean, he's running things are just going his way it's just nonstop windfalls Calvin evening the him and his companion. Who would be crystal say they refused, but the two men ordered them to snort the drugs that did not happen that did not. Tire. But I didn't want to. They said you put it up knows fad or put my head down in the sniff. It right. I hope this is what it was. I thought it was sticks wishes. I hope it is a cardio ship inside the storage unit when he was like you need to snort cocaine and the guy was like, I'm not knowing that I hope that Phil or Phil or Bill about safety manager. You said you gotta start one line guys. Let me help you. Jeep today. Gotta do one take to get me had to have me get you into this drug. I just wanna get you into this die told you the story, right? One time I was helping a friend by a car, and the and the person kept doing cited sales for very long time the person selling the car kept doing the let me go talk and would come back with the number. So then I said, look, I'm really good friends with her accountant. So let me give him a call and see what she can do on her and budget wise to your every time they would go away. I would go. So then I'm coming up game. Like, he won't let me do it and the other guys. Yeah, he won't let me do it. I'm like, I guess we can't do any. He's. Can you literally just sets up the same game on them? Both of us are just it's a Mercer of someone on the other end gain in. And he said, Chris I have to check with him. And they call the stroke club manager, like human manager at the diner. No you too. The victim said they refuse. They were forced then one of the suspects demanded money from the man before driving him to a remote street forcing him to strip off his clothes, then dropping him off on a remote road. You know, what a neighbor spotted the man and called the police I say it's good like, this is a good moment of gender role reversals because you know, he showed up to watch her stripped naked and by the end of the night he had this ship naked. But what for that's what I'm saying? I don't know if they got any money. On coke and took off his. On all this. She takes guy to a diner has has. I'm not saying she is. So wit part have which parts of been confirmed by the police he said that like so far. I think what we got is confirmed. He definitely drugs, but obviously, they force and the other two dudes do exist. They're not like yes Kaiser Soviet, and they were never there him the whole time. Let's go to joint you. Cook we shouldn't do it. But we have to. You know about yourself. You don't have been punched in the face a lot of that type. I don't know because I was like really kind of hoping I was really worried about the moment when crystal turns, and we find out that she's with these other guys because I do I'm holding onto this idea that like they had some real like connective pure. No at that diner. It wasn't just somebody was like sucking on somebody's privates. Behind a dumpster. They were sitting down for pancakes. Like like a lady in gentle lady Jovan would. But I don't know what happens to crystal because he's the only one who gets found. This is a dark road to start going. Right. Literally Dr country, right? That she called a cab. A neighborhood neighbor spotted the man and called police, quote, there's a man running naked going west on Bethel road. Bethel grandma's best friends. I was Bethel is Bethel said one caller. He was going help help there's been an accident. And this is this is the quote from the caller who's the only person who makes good decisions in the story is already the quote. He was going help help there's been an accident. And I wasn't about to go out there. That I was I came in you, stay back there. I hear you. There's been an accident at call someone for you. I'm not coming with you to find the only way I can help us to be as far away from you as possible. He didn't do the emotional Aniko. A good line. That'll make people happy police were initially sceptical of the man's story. But they question the dancer who story matched the victims. Is it crazy as it sounded a I actually did happen pretty closely to the way they said sergeant Jeremy Lewis of more police, I wish it would as we always said, we need more police. I wish you saying that said the lead investigator, Robert Muller. This guy holdback focus. I still feel like there's there's that gap. Wanted she go once we've done the coke from from the coke to the running on the street. Things are real realistic coke up. Yeah. I think also leaves room for some some whimsical fantastical events, many musical numbers. Take. Fairies L. Gone and been a king someplace for many decades. Style. Just doing donuts. I got him in a liberty. Not police assured neighbors that kidnappers weren't roaming the streets at all hours of the night, saying the victim played at least a partial role in what transpired they won't be able to like he kind of set himself up for his own kidnapping. Thank don't be scared of Jeep. They this is what another sergeant Jeremy Lewis said there were there were a few crimes committed. But a lot of horrible decisions led up to him eventually being found naked in Norman Norman is one of my favorite. It's like the. My favorite songs. Arrest warrants were issued for traits and told us who have been charged with two counts of kidnapping and one count of robbers so many questions. Yes. And they were found to this story is out for them. If two men approach you in a parking lot at five AM or six. Go to go to the Jeep if two men in a parking lot approach you say that they wanna say Jay while you're hanging out with stripper that you just met at three AM outside of outside of a diner. Do not go to the storage unit to do it unless you're ready to. It's that simple unless you're ready to read. So I first time I said, this you still I totally forgot I thought the same exact thing never go to the second location already know that China beat the system. Right sister, not going to be the ones should be a whole ask for auto trader dot com. Only do it online. Yes. Do the line which only show me the Carfax. I just I don't understand trying to take it off of show me the money. And then why why is there your FOX when it's fat and be a fuck like shouldn't even be a fax anymore. So. The car. Maybe facts as the fact like the baby. FAA? That's how old how do you? How do you spell? Fox. It's a lot of. Story one. Skinner is with us, and we are so happy. She's here. Stay with us. More people town wrapped in. Guys. The podcasting world is growing bigger and bigger every day and Himalayas wants to help you navigate it. What is Himalayan? I'll tell you right now is a brand new podcasting apps. We can find every single podcast that you love and some future fame. I've got it. Randy. I've got it on my phone. Yeah. Whether you're a podcast or a fan Himalayas has got your back. Discover personally curated playlists and show your favorite podcasters some love with a cool feature Himalayas tip jar. It's free. It's the easiest to use. And they're adding cool new features. Everyday damning Kirk is going to tell you where to get all you got to go to that app store. Baby. Download Himalayas that's H I M A L A Y. That's H I M A L A Y A and don't forget to follow dump people town, which on you to go there. So show some love and check out everything. All you have to do is download it it's free and you'll get shows like this. Hey, gang. 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That's dumb people town. We have a live show that we are doing at sketch fest in San Francisco Friday night, January eleventh at eleven or ten thirty comes comedy right before they were doing a stand up show with Dan. And right after that Uber right after that birthday. But at Bravo, categorize come see, then come see us do that. You don't scotch Festus. You're going to be there the weekend after high staining people stick around. Yeah. Yeah. What's your show? I'm doing a live coal playlist, and I'm doing great podcast, which people should immediately. Subscribe to what is it? Explain it me and a guest create a playlist for a specific life event moment or occasion. So we've done things like a playlist for Goth wedding or playlist for getting waking up and getting out of bed or the most recent one was a party for animals and ghosts with Aparna Erla. So we talk through the different songs that we use. And that leads to a lot of conversation about life and. With all those weird that send them again, cool playlist? What other show you doing? I'm also doing Skinner box, which is a it's my improvised. It's like a combination of improv and stand up improvise music stand up its second weekend sketch fest guy venues that you're doing an ad or. No, okay. What? People all scientists people were talking to you now about ours than the next weekend. Good reason to go. And also, she's a good follow on the Twitter's. And on the Instagram's Sela her both is it just allies Skinner Skinner for Twitter at east gins for Instagram. Gotta get that change. I know, and you changed your name or know someone else for some reason. Once I got verified, I think like I can't I don't know. I'm gonna get give them a people e skin cool. Cool. It is cool. But people don't find me people being like, I didn't know. Here's a second one do that. I will remind everybody January twenty second the together to or my stand up comedy tour will be coming to Las Vegas, Nevada. Go to Daniel van Kirk Duncombe to come hang out in the in Vegas on January twenty second. All right. This was sending by Jeffrey Elber Ganey, a LB ever my kids seeing those cars. Every car. He owns the doors opened at JJ Gainey as I said A L E R G H I. An Albuquerque is such a great last name. I'm sorry. That guys basketball coach over game picking up so many different ethnicities. I wanna say it's just straight up Albanian and attempt. See? Maybe some the we're not even familiar with a rogue h in there that I don't even know about. G H Anki wasn't an airlines Albert getting airline Guinea allies. We flew Albert, Anita Pennsylvania. Here's the thing. I the Allegheny is the river in Pennsylvania, and it was Allegheny airlines. So what I think though in a movie somewhere, someone should say. Can you please give me the Guinea file? That's all you want. That's all you want all in the elevated. We're gonna to go on the long way around. This just read the file. Yeah. Where's the give you well I had to start a boiler room and rent out a whole bunch of stuff here. It is. Thank you. Thank you. All these papers are still intact. Well. Our car. Fox's. Yeah. In the people vs allegany Elba. Amy. Alber gamy. It's it found for the people. And so so, obviously, we're we're chasing Alber Gainey are the people that I thought he was the most of the people of all of our then everyone stands up on their worked as I'm Alber gaining. Jeffrey, let's cut do. I not Albert Ganey. Are you ready? Yes. Other says bakers ruined his son's birthday cake with their quote pathetic, decorating skills. I gotta say I recently had a birthday cake for my son. And I was mildly disappointed. What do you think the theme? Right. So fortnight's, I send I give them a print it out photo of the stupid, fortnight Lama, and all they do is sort of silkscreen it and place it on top of the cake. It's almost like they put a piece of paper on the cake and eat the photo can't sugar. A lot of people. Actual fucking Lama. What do you wanna I wanted? I know it's Ralph's, but they should have done a little bit. There we go now border on that shit put a border on it put a border on it. Gainey out. Gene, Helford to say in hell for you know, the he ain't Halford when he meets Shane Helford. Where Shane we've met multiple times. Hell for damn glad debate. Again. We. I know what you do. I hired you a year ago. But if you got some of these cell phone Sachs would really help you out known what they want to they want it in their pocket or the person. Gotta try sack by the way. Shame setup is not a good name for your shark tanks. Gonna love it. You guys are fucking laugh at yourself. Not me Shane kid's birthday party. Stop trying to sell the parents Shane how claims he paid for a special frog themed birthday cake from a wool worth store in Tamworth New, South Wales. Nineteen eighty four wars where you get your cakes. Does that still Kate? In New South Wales. So he's a British policeman. He's a policeman ordered the kick for his son Mason's. Third birthday and says the store confirmed his request prior to picking it up. So he ordered it normally do this cake. Yeah. Let's do it. However, Helford and his wife Amy were horrified to discover their son's caked, look nothing like they expect it looks like. I was like in the same shale green, dick. They can't be horrified. I went down to the store three days before my son's third birthday to order the cake. I explained to them. We wanted a frog theme as my son loves frogs Helford wrote on Facebook. They told me it could be three years old loves frogs. Can you really say he loves a three? And we had three year olds. I have a five year old three olds. Don't love anything. They don't have any. They go through. They go through faith. They don't do for short amounts of time. They love this week this damn kid loved frogs. Okay. Told me it could be done. No worries addle he explained to them. He wanted a frog thing. That's over promising on the Keixing, no worries at all, right? You should be worried about a couple of things he wrote all times, he wrote down everything, I guess, I guess that shelter. No. She's saying though, I just I'm like, I'm still stuck on the how how do you fuck up frogs? Yeah. That's a great question. We're going to get out. We're gonna find out Helford said entrepreneur he wrote down everything I said and said it would be ready by Sunday morning. I was very excited to see it. He added like he's the fan of frog. He also I've planned we've plan kids where they parties you like getting at the frog thing by Thursday. Great. Yes. We've got it. We'll get it by Sunday morning. Great. You don't say, yes. You don't say. I'm very excited to see it. You're like great what other shit? Dawn. I don't have to thank all book. The clown thrilled excited about the sugar in there. This is drugs for them. At all. So this is about like, what are these other dads think they think they're frogs which better than my cake? Got a frog up if I'm gonna make this thing look good. When Shane collected the cake, Shane Helford, entrepreneur collected the cake on the morning of the party. He checked the box at home. And was quote mortified mortified by the result more of fraud. Vaginas show, you this frog theme cake, which by the way, it will be on our Facebook page, if you're listening to our podcast, and you don't you're not a member of the Facebook page. What are you doing more? I just open a box. And it wasn't the cake. I ordered can't prepare you guys for how perfectly bad this cake. I cannot wait to see Dan, you're siding with this dude in his mortification. What did he want? What? Cake for a how years how many you're? It is it's it's a frog. Vagina is the super sexy. Frog. Perfect. Right. That is perfect. That's as good as the off season to writing. Like some Star Trek. Hugh puzzle. That's better. Ask someone asks. It's just can we describe? Swear square green cake with a small green smiley face in the upper left hand corner. And then slightly to the side and below it the number three green process intervene frosting, angry, no frog anywhere. I would if they've got the like. Hunting around the corner is the theme of affront being that it is look at just even the placement of it. It's. Dave this up so badly didn't open. Abstract from Cohn. Shane hall entrepreneur said that he told they wrote everything down that he wanted. And what did they tell him? I'm dan. Got it all set. I'm gonna tell you shirt guys. That's just this cake. Please we had it says on the bottom frog cake. What is the journey at the bakery that ended up with that like somebody being like oh shit? We have to do a frog high. Did they get when they made this? And they're like, this is amazing or how long did they wait to the last minute. The front of the store. Okay. Maybe there was just like seventeen those for kids of all different ages. And they were like we'll we'll use the three year old. There's a seven-year-old coming in getting the exact it is it is so beautiful Shane set. I would laugh if I opened up I know I would just laugh I would be like literally. I would this joke is too good to eat joke is too good to eat. I would not be mortified this is a quote from Saint Hawford entrepreneur they had this tiny little number three along with a smiley face all written in green icing. It would've taken five seconds to do. He said I decided to just ring Woolworth's to see if they could fix it. I explained the situation, but was told they didn't decorate cakes. So now. We've never divorced, sir. You've always run this hotel. What we don't take our cases. Like, yeah. You do he now he's probably he's going crazy. That that we're gonna brothers frog. Michigan j Michigan j. All right. Helford said that the family enlisted a cake decorator who saved his son's birthday cake, just twenty minutes before do you have a picture? I have a picture of cake, boss style. It's like battery operated. Frog drives the car. I have a picture of a family. Yeah. I have a picture of the family, and you're going to see that allies is right. The only person who cares about frogs in. This photo is the days the debt just based on expression on this kid doesn't care. You think his birthday was ruined? No way. He doesn't care. Give him a skittle and tell him. It's a frog problem is you might. Choke on that kid. Upset that he's in a button-down shirt. That's all right, right. I don't even think that kid wants to be in that family. This is a classic case of I ordered something I want what I ordered I paid for it. I deserve to get what I ordered. These people are like we're gonna fuck with this guy on the most Royal level ever. I'm gonna guess there's there are there's at least one if not a couple better places well known for making frosting. In that town, this guy tried to what beat the system. So now game the system. He had any friend at that party. Who's in comedy? They tell him leave this fucking cake the way you have been give any doubles confidence not comedy. But you know further on that tip. You know, his wife was like this make re right around St Louis at your wealth. That's right. Came down. And he was like, no, I can do it babe. Well, we're has it. Double checked with them with them. Just into my shed. Joel I was most disappointed with just the lack of effort. It's all sudden, he's their high school football coach. It's not that. I'm not proud. Are. You not mad at the point at least a carbon ion. Sort of it seemed like they didn't even care. He said it was a disgrace. I will never be buying cakes from Woolworths again. In the first place. Thank you. Thank you. Thankfully, the post since gone viral racking up thousands of likes and shares on social media in spite of the fewer how. Still had a great Burr Dannon. Toy doesn't give a shit was on drugs. Did you just say anything about the fortnight cake? My son scrapped all of it in front of his friends to be the cool, crumbled it up into a ball and put it in his mouth eight the fort here at the lab, and I spent so much time reprinting it to make sure that the full thing got on the page, it grabbed it crumbled into his hands away like mash Brenda to kid. Yes. Jason son is Jason is twenty two. How still at a great birthday party and enjoyed eating the repaired version of the cake as he gives us shit. The Tamworth store doesn't usually offer a full cake decoration service. They don't that's. That is always willing to help local customers said Woolworth's spokesperson the team offered to attempt the decorations requested. So they're saying so we did the best. We could look we did our part. That's what we consider to be a front. They're trying to make it like you ask for too much. Plus, it's Woolworth's it. What you do you get cake? And then you go get a little bag like plastic frogs sprinkle guys on. Thank you. Nobody's allowed to put them in the mouth. It's a bunch of frogs can look their feet off gotta give him back. No extra cost. Well, we're sorry to oh. That's the thing. They offered to attempt to decorations requested at no extra cost. So he also wasn't on. The system in the parking lot or in the don't cut a corner back to haunt you. Jeep. Yeah. You're not going to beat the exceptions. She cake his great. But don't go beyond what it is. And I bet that take cake taste an awesome. We're sorry to disappointed the customer with our cake decorating, particularly on such a special day for the family. We've been in contact with the customer to apologize and provide them with a gift card. I mean, I ask you guys how much money is onto Fain Helford spend on that Cal K. Here we go out much does that say. Five dollars. Okay. Yes. So you can go first or second or gives between us that's the flooding between because she chose to go between us when she was on this show spending just gas right now, I go twelve dollars dollars chair ranch says. She. How how many kids are it was this defeat? How many people were at their house? Well, but we don't know if you've got a big. Shame right. I'm gonna stick with twelve twelve bucks. Go Jay, the thirty dollar cake, thirty dollars at twenty four dollars cake. And I would say actually, it's a twenty five dollar. It's twenty four ninety nine. Okay. Family. I was called the I almost called our townies families. Family members townies chances in right now because the amount of money family. Yes. The amount of money spent on this cake by Shane Hallford entrepreneur. Was gonna get a phone sack. Phonak not included in the cost of forty nine dollars. Beating the system theory expensive, Kate I can understand what he was. Maybe the that changes it a little bit. Gift card offered to him by wolves to make up for it. When he nine dollars dollars. Can we all guest said eighteen to twenty nine I say thirty five fifty dollars. We're gonna bump you up by a buck. They stood right by him. Kinda embarrassed. But you know, how like when you do something wrong with a friend or lover, or whatever even with your kids, and you screw up you need to give a certain apology like you can't give a forty five dollar policy on a forty nine dollar Bill. You gotta go one of. And then everything is like now, Mike. Okay. Well, we're did your job. You saved your little admitted that you saved your frog app. It makes hit the stink that he raised online a little embarrassing because it's also like if you're like, hey, you know, what we're just going to have a ten dollar limit on on gifts this year. And then you're like, here's a twenty five dollar gift, very thoughtful. And you're like. Very thoughtful. And you're like. That I only feel back. I got a mixed CD for everybody. Stories, but is it a cool place. It is. Check it out. We have one more story to go. Dan. Give us a little teaser before we go to break. Some scary dumbness happens on the ocean. As opposed to in the baby nothing about ghost. I'm way too ready for ghost. We've had. We've had. No. But the scare the ocean. We had a woman on this show who tried to marry on as a guest known this. Shame. Yes. I know everybody who sent it to me they're getting a divorce, but they're getting into we might get into it on a future. Let's get it on a few. But but right now allies Skinner skin around when we come back scariness scary dumbness on the high seas. It's people stay with sitting around. A yellow dude I got the new Kevin scripted season to trailer here. It's fire. Dillard, those several quick man Firday I want here. It all started with an intern were still alive. Faster faster. Those monsters will bring real trouble. I saw the fear bother nature has arrived. They could night cherry. Shit. This is your destiny. I've been dreaming about this day. You wanted men. There is no salvation today. The National Park Service always pays deaths guys say, Iran. I ran to the man. You must be him. You must be Kevin. Yo what the fuck is is out of the Whitman. She's week cabinets. Cryptic season, two all new episodes. Start Tober twenty-second on star. Burns audio subscribed today. What the hell are you talking to you a high off you'll ask? Hey, guys. Welcome back to the show. We have allies Skinner here. All right, Dan. Take us home, brother. Here we go Senate him by Joe Latrell at the gentleman Joe idea if he belongs to a club or owns one sounds like he's a good, dude. Any always sends us in. She likes GPS. I know cheap. I like red. Some other even one that I can't buy storage unit in the middle of the night that I can't. I'm really high. Okay. Pre grading ten Florida. Okay raid. And Tera Myers. TARA says this woman who always has like tan lines hair my on burn. And then the wire Myers has a cigarette on lit from the lips. Definitely it's like a caprine twenty one. It's a it's a Virginia. Slim glassy bitch down flip flops. Down. And she's she's got the lighter in her hand. And she's yelling at someone to stop doing. Something says, it's one of the biggest lessons she's ever learned. I'm glad she learning things. She never thought something like this could happen. This is also when someone tells you you can't make this stuff up. You can make anything that any starts. You can't make. I never thought something like this happens. You did. Now, I thought a lot of things that happened to me. I thought I might choke on a beer Bong thought, I might eight a streamer lights. Yeah. Yeah. I definitely thought that ghosts were trying to fuck me and must leap. To to you. But you never. How'd you stop them? Started conversations with them. They got scared to open up to me. Genius. But this never. A native Floridian grew up around water spending, countless hours, I grew up around water most Floridians, I know that's what I thought grown up around water spending, countless hours on the Gulf of Mexico, but one day senior couldn't ours. I love as you had to beat yesterday. I can't count them. Many to count from twelve to three don't even know what that is mind Canet things keep in mind that she has told you she never thought this could happen ever. And I just told you that she spent s- countless hours by water on the. In mexico. Yeah. But one day seems to stand out far beyond all others. Let me guess she fed a shark October twenty first the day. She'll never forget course not that set that Sunday, she thought she and her son might die. I've never been more scared in my entire life told WFL eight on your side, and I fell down twenty wells. Be scared. Will you had to say come on? I won't. Well, you know, you get you get cocky anything lightning doesn't strike seventeen. Eighteen nineteen twenty. It was supposed to be a day. Like any other a lot of hyperbole in this one? Where shields Brennan Brennan from Bradenton if a long time together, we are a nautical family. We spend time on the water all the time yet what I'm about to tell you. She never thought would happen. I spent a lot of time on the water they decided to enjoy the sunny skies that Sunday on Anna Maria island, you know, that new movie thought that was about my son brand. He spends a lot of time on that. How much time on this trip? I ever in the water Joel long on it. Yes. They added a new item to their list of each supplies guy. Say it again, I don't want. Our giant inflatable swan raft won that game popularity over the summer beach is all over Tampa Bay and beyond. Swan tried to fuck that's. On it. And he was angry about it, which I have seen before. But never from swum swans. Nice there. Mean sex. English Queen is right for eight. Decision that that's left Tara filled with regret at the same time. She's also grateful. She learned powerful us and one that she wants to share with other parents read morning dad's about launching a raft onto a big body of water. Yeah. You mean without an anchor. Her son got taking your son probably got taken twenty miles out. And describes how dangerous it was that day, and how desperate she felt you feel very small and can't be seen or heard totally invisible. She explained she went on the boat. He says she and her seven year old son set sail on the swan that sale there was a sale. I think that she's being figured if she's. The new America's Jess knees down for the battles. And James get your cellphone in it. But I don't care can fall asleep. Just a little bit. Just a little bit just rest as. Stare. Brain. Goma till we bump up against side of the pool. Out of the pool. Okay. Okay. Good cigarettes. Do you only let you know that we were out far enough brand cigarette burns down to the nubby. You let me know. Okay. 'cause we're getting farther away. I know baby. Okay. Father way from these problem. We just got we just got a sale the length of a song. Okay. Way. I was just going to be hair back, which really surprised Tara is how misleading the conditions were that day. It seems safe on the call Gulf water, by the way is no way yet. Always save minutes later, this mom couldn't believe what was happening. The current carried them way. Too far. It was ghosts. It was like we was pulled ghost ghost. Several miles. I was not sure if we were going to keep drifting because land just kept getting farther and farther and farther away. Us my cellphone Meshu on the beam. She knew she had. Began swimming with the swan paddling as hard as she could with her body halfway off the float she kicked her feet quickly. Trying to propel the swan forward it didn't or no back 'cause she's a hero. Do you? I mean, look just dropping titling all screwed up in our lives when you screw up with your kid. Yeah. That. Oh my God. You would take an anchor on a on a on a even even at my family's little check of a cabinet, Wisconsin. If you don't tie your raft on the lake to something you'll end up down at Sharon Burg's. There was little drinking Gingras. So on every level of every raft? I'm like you better down you're going away when you're going away. So I don't know. I swear you're going away going in anything. By the way, tie this shit down a brick or something probably or you'd be going away. I didn't if this ref didn't have those little. What's that for keys? Down. Because even if sometimes if you are too, and it's only two feet of water, and you're gonna float down a river. You have time. Yeah. That's where you wanna stay in one place for a while. So that's what you need that for sushi tries to swim pushing I imagine so she's pushing and also I'm sure I think we can get this. I remember trying to hold it together for those kids that she. No clue right. It didn't work. Bit stated and drained. Go ahead. I was just excited about shark. She felt devas. She felt I'm sorry defeated and drained realizing just how strong the current was is strong. I was just exhausted. And we were not going anywhere. Like, I was doing that for an inch. She recalled Tara says she tried to try so scary. Yeah. They call them in front of her young, son. But inside she was panicked. She wondered if anyone would see them ever. So this is like the Florida equivalent of of hiking mishaps. Hundred percent, or is she going to arm off xactly? Use it as an orange. And knock it this. Honey, I need your arm. Money money that Horan. Branding babies again turns out each did see her going out to sea and began calling nine one one terrifyingly saw a west manatee fire. I just hope to. I. Seila that's happened for people. Yeah. Okla man like all the time. I never thought that could be real would have been killer whales that no back to shore. And then they and someone filmed, and it's now part of the new blackwater documentary. I would go race of captivity helpful way, captivity killer, I've talked to you know, that since there's a whole theory see where I only heard from Joe Rogan that scientists that people have this theory that humans like when we were training for World War Two, fighter pilots train. They're like air to ground shots by shooting killer whales and there used to be attacks on humans by killer whales just in the Pacific northwest because they were guys with us no ever since World War Two. There's never been another recorded attack on a human by killer whale. And they think that they're so smart that they communicate each other. We are the lesser species. So we should not attack them. A whole bunch of them. So there aren't enough to attack him. Yeah. The only have ever been in captivity since the forties early orca to know or Free Willy she said, she felt also then she sees the manatee fire rescue boat with flashing lights. She couldn't then she couldn't stop the tears filled with gratitude that she and her son were saved. I literally just laid down on that swan flow and tried. I mean. Just a Sunday for her. In the draft. With a box of white is very different. Yeah. I literally just laid down on that swan float and cried so hard because this could have been ended so much worse. And I didn't want him to know that. I was scared. She cries hard when they brought her back to shore. And then took her son away child protective services to that. This could be a movie, also Robert Redford. That's already right. Brought back to the shore. There was one more thing left to do hop. That swan bad swan had to go. Her son. I'm about to give you guys a little bit of scene painting. That is going to really tell you everything you need to know about her son happened to be wearing a shark tooth necklace. Of course years old for the shark tooks Tooth's neck leading those firecrackers mama have from the back of the car. You like her wanna see me kick stuff outside? You can watch kicks the right? Fire crackers. Out of your good onto the riverbed. Look what I can do. Brennan lead that Cadillac. Her son happened to be wearing shorts to necklace. He used the tooth to puncture a hole in the swan late a bit chair said she felt relief. When she saw that swan deflated, this really doesn't states. But also those things normally have two different air pockets head and the base. So I did they pop both. Or was it just head being like, by the way? Yes. You could've easily just pulled the thing that you inflate it with. Let brand do it. He's mad terrorists that she felt relief when she saw this lawn deflated flung over the shoulder of a firefighter quote. He threw it in a dumpster. She said with a laugh, not funny, and it's not it's comedy. And you're blaming one person. Brandy. You say yours again. And then we're going to let Joe. Joke. You said something in the dumpster, right? Yeah. Just do it in a dumpster. Just like my prom dress. Sometimes jokes are too. Good. Good. I'm sorry. Also, I hope there's one person who is like what? Do you know what that's one? Because what do you don't you? Don't you just need a break? Drink. I'll take that man. At the end of all of the end of all this territory to us the next time, they take the raft out for a day. The only water they'll use it in. We'll have chlorine broke the raft. And they threw me. No. You're not taking anything out of, you know, take it out into a bathtub. Yeah. I know to stop it from draining. There was I'm gonna I guarantee and I say this because everybody's fine. The moment they both got on. That's one. There was a sex a second or one of them thought. I think we're moving and they didn't do anything about it. Yes. She did. I'm glad she tried it. And I'm glad they're safe. But people that is a hell of a dump story, and I'm happy. They're all right. Also, though, I she is dumb because she never suspected that could ever happen. That is the most. That's what I say hospitable. Things have thought this could have proceeds tell say she spent her whole life on the water and never thought about being adrift at sea. By the way, it's one of the two things that can happen one. Is that you stay put the second. Yeah. That's one of two thinking she hasn't been on ocean water. On the gopher whole life. She said she'd been around water fair round water shake above ground. Since I was five that's fair. That's the story. Skinner? Thank you so much for help in you have an open invite to come out. And everybody checkout cool playlist her awesome pica severe in San Francisco the weekend after I think eighteen seventy nineteen Chuck out. Check her out sketch fascist her podcast live. She's awesome. And then check out Skinner box, which I heard from multiple people who've seen that show before in the past is stand up improvised music all that chasing. You get to see this, brilliant, comedy mind opened up and hence played out for you and OSHA we gotta get back to work. Dumb dumb dumb. Around. Tau? Show.

Dumb People Town

Aired 3 months ago 65:36

Dave Dameshek

There's a new podcast app that delivers chilling crime stories straight to your mobile device everyday. They release a new episode that investigate the gruesome true acts of America's war, sue killers. And you can explore into the minds of psychopaths and murderers to get started finding download murder minute from the app store or visit murder minute dot com. That's M E R D R M. I N U T dot com to get your daily dose of true crime creeping delivered straight to your mobile device. I folks this is Tim Heidegger, you might know me from Tim, and Eric and from other movies and TV shows and everything I host a semi weekly call in show called office hours. It's broadcast live on my YouTube channel, and it becomes a podcast almost immediately afterwards. So sign up. Thanks to star burns audio for making it possible. It's a terrific show. We take your calls. We talk about whatever you want. And we respect you. And we we love listening to your thoughts. It's a lot of good. It's a lot of fun. And we have Doug loosen hop. DJ? Doug pound with me. It's a show that you're gonna wanna explore. It's a show you're gonna wanna share your family and your friends and pass along your goal. I think he's going to join it as well. So you. Talking to the misdemeanor bills like early eighties Niccolo ally. It's nice the one I love night. Shop is the name the scar brothers in this view from the seats. Our weekly look at what happened in the week sports are take on what is going on in the world of sports. Hopefully, it's take that you don't hear elsewhere. And we are so happy joined us because we have great guest today as we are midway little over midway point in the NFL season. Dave damasec who is he knows his NFL amazing. Also, a he is a big lady on bell. And we're gonna talk about with him. Just tweeted goodbye. Farewell dealers. Farewell. He said farewell Miami. So we'll see what happens with that. So so he's going to talk a little bit Steelers with him. And obviously talking about the NFL. Can anyone the Rams showed that they were fallible? I like seeing that the saints showed what they could do it looks like a big four. It's like Kansas City. No one's going to be New England. Canned City New England's going to beat New England. LA and and the saints. So we'll talk about that with him. So here later on the show again leaves voicemail there may be a job opening here with the dodgers. Dave Roberts has not been signed to a contract at why not is again, why not he lets us know we'll talk about that. And tonight, we are in Austin, Texas at the cap city comedy club. Come see if they're two shows teachers tomorrow, we'll talk more about her schedule later. But I this is the best time of year, sports wise because all the sports are humming. MBA the NHL when we're tomorrow night is the first night of college basketball, Kansas plays Michigan state on my do place Kentucky. It's it's all starting to fire all comedy. And of course, we are heading down the homestretch November to remember as the sort of we decide who will be in the college football playoff. This is our take this week. It is short. It is sweet it is time and this year better than ever is the time to show that it is time to expand the college football playoff to eight teams. Why are they fighting this? When when have you ever noticed? Known like a larger turned out. You don't want money. You don't like money. You don't want other fan base to get involved. That's bullshit. You will have no matter what with the four teams that get in this year. There will be four other teams that will be really pissed and believe that they should be there easy. So listen. So here's what happens big twelve is going to be West Virginia versus Oklahoma. One of those teams is going to be a one loss team in Oklahoma. Looks amazing West Virginia. Look good to look they Texas down to the wire whatever they're playing at what happens if Oklahoma plays West Virginia they played over the last game of the season. And then they meet each other. If they both have then find that's beat each other each one way, then they're then they're both out. But to me if one of those teams team twice then now, you got a one loss team from the big twelve that looks the part and could be in there. What happens if Georgia beats Alabama in the SEC championship game, which I don't think it's gonna happen on anybody's gonna beat Alabama. What if they do what if they just Moore have the game of there? Life and bama's off. Right. And they win by let's say feel hurt. Yeah. Whatever I'm just saying like then Georgia's team, Alabama's one less team. Those teams are in Notre Dame in clemson's and there's four what's going to happen in Michigan. Michigan runs the table and wins out and they're a one loss team. And they're only lost to another team. That's in the playoffs. So someone's gonna be mad central Florida's saying we belong there weren't undefeated team. I don't know if that's necessarily true. But to eight teams they could be there. They could be there and why when Anwar zoo Washington state, the no-one tax about the Pac ten because twelve pack twelve most people most people. There is no fuck why aren't people talking about the pack. No. Here's the deal. Like, here's how simple it is. Both season starts mid mid December December nineteenth twentieth is the first ballgame right? Then you had out that whole week. And you got bull games that don't matter until the twenty twenty six small fan base is root for their teams all the way up until like the twenty eighth six win teams from the MAC. Here's what you do on Christmas Eve Christmas Eve, you play the the first games of that whole thing on Christmas Eve, that's the way you do it on Christmas Eve you play those games in that first round. If it's that's I guess the quarterfinals so to speak, and then you get things rolling. And then you play on New Year's that maybe January second, and then the next week January seven you give yourself a week a week a week. And I'm telling you college football fans would love Christmas Eve a chance to not have to relate to relatives. And watch what will be phenomenal games if you were. Central Florida versus Oklahoma. A, you know, a Washington state versus Georgia or a Michigan versa. Washington. State to me. Those are great first round games that to me that would be an eight team playoff do it. Now like how ballsy with the incident? See if they changed it midstream right now, they say we can't come up with four. Let's do because if you just keep it before they're going to be four teams that are going to be out of it. And that is a problem. That's a problem for the NC double A, and it's a huge one. Because then you're saying yourself, why did you pick this team? I mean, I guess Valla. Bama loses. Their navy in the championship game. They were they already want. So they're going to be a championship game. But like there was that whole thing last year where they're like Alabama's on the championship game. But they passed the test. Of course, they can pass the test. They have all five stars on the team. They're like a pro they're like a mini pro team with training wheels. They pass the eye test. Of course, they do. So they're going to get in no matter what. And then what? So I'm just saying it sort of ended up we're giving you the out here. Ear Vanna eight teams right now. No one will get mad at you. Everyone will be super exciting sayers. Getting these games on on Christmas Eve. No one will be man. Everyone would be excited. This is Chuck. Oh, baby. Blood orange squad others here. Dave damage shat with us on the other side of the break. Stay tuned. Ran you just went to the dentist last week last week and my dentist trip. My cleaning was the shortest it's ever been. Now, explain why it's because of my quip it has to be. That's the only thing that I've sort of changed over the course of the last few visits is my quip used the quick electric toothbrushes, my favorite thing. It's probably one of my favorite new items that I own in my house. It's a sleekly designed small this is important electric toothbrush. No giant cord connector a base that you gotta carry with Jay we travel all the time to be able to take a small electric battery operated. Sleek electric toothbrush on the road with us. You don't miss a beat your teeth cleaning perfect. My dentists said to me your teeth. Look great took me twenty five minutes for them to normally forty five minute cleaning. I'm cutting time off I feel better about the way it brushes better the little pulses that tell you where to every thirty seconds this switch. Here's the other thing that they they they send you knew brush heads. Every three months, which is easy to change. Which is what you're supposed to do is change out. Your brush heads a lot of time. People are brushing if you look at home, it's probably you've been on the heads way too long. So obviously, we love it. Oprah's Olis' loves at time magazine one of the best adventures of the year. Other back by network of twenty thousand Denison hygienists hundreds of thousands of happy users. We loading us quip starts at just twenty five dollars. That's the other thing. It's not that expensive. If you go to get quip dot com slash cheap seats right now. You get your first refill pack for free with a quip electric toothbrush that your I refill pack for free. You might not think about brushing your teeth that much I got this old tooth. I of my dad actually wanted brush my teeth more. Now that I have I want you guys to try this get quip dot com slash cheap seats that G E T Q, IP dot com slash cheese. Get started they get free refill pack. It's only twenty five bucks and then watch your dentist trips. Become so much easier. And more dare I say palatable guys the right hire can make a huge. Huge impact on your business. We've spoken about this many times our parents own their own business as we were growing up and they liver. Died lived or died on who they hired when it was someone. Good life was better for all of us all the way around when they had someone bad a bad person in the office. It really made their work hard and searching for someone was really hard. And that's why it's so important to find the right person. But where do you find that individual you can post job on a job board and hope that you get the right person for your job? But think about how often do you hang out on job boards? I really don't. So don't leave finding someone great to chance when you can actually post your job to a place where people go every day to make connections grow in their career. And discover job opportunities. Most Lincoln members haven't really visited top job boards, but nine and ten members are open to new opportunities. That is a very interesting concept to have someone who is success one. What they're doing. Going to grab them and put them in your situation, which would help them and help you with seventy percent of the US workforce on linked in posting on looting. Lincoln is the best way to get your job opportunity. Front of more of the right people people were qualified for your role and ready for something new. This is the best way to find the person who will help you grow your business. And isn't that what you wanna do? You don't wanna just keep it at the same level? You wanna grow it? And why new hire has made is made every ten seconds using Lincoln. Hurry to Lincoln dot com slash cheap seats to get fifty dollars off your first job post. That's Lincoln dot com slash cheap seats to get fifty dollars off your first job post, Lincoln dot com slash cheap seats. Terms and conditions apply. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the show. Jason had to step out. We don't need them. We really don't need him. No. He had to step out deal with a little family thing. He'll be all right. But I am here with my mandate damasec, and I'm so happy that you're here right now on the day that lady on bell tweets. Farewell miami. Whatever that means. Yeah. I took to social media and tried to figure it out my salad. Not mean while Disneyland I tried to map out just to give him some help along the way. I I went on like, I say, Google maps. And look how long it takes to go from the southern point of Florida up to get into the Mississippi River to what is that the delta the delta jet ski all the way up the Mississippi, then take a hard right at the Ohio valley Gainey river where we do we. When do we have? I feel like we must have talked about this before. But I'll say it again, I really resent ohi-. I shouldn't I resent. I don't resent Ohio guy went to Michigan. So high oh is not high on my list of. To be fair. The buckeyes have knocked off the wall rings. I don't mean to remind me. So the last fifteen years, I think we've once in the loop. We fickle them and that was in the Luke fickle year, but we lost fourteen out of fifteen so literally true. I think it was I boy, it's it's not good. What was that Graham? I'm sorry terrible. Then I hate to really bring this up. But I have you know, for the last few years of tried to help people out linguistically a little bit because we often fall into calling teams that play each other every year more than once or whatever we call them rivals and way about that. You're not rivals. If one side always beat as the other. It's right unless you can look at the totality of the relationship because for many years Michigan beat Ohio State neck out, currently they aren't rivals. Although this year, I think Michigan may be favored going into Columbus. Believe sense. So when the rivalry is is there, bad blood stirred up does your blood boil when you face them this weekend, Michigan faces Rutgers is they're gonna be excitement or bad or Indiana the next week here you but. I'm sure the punching bag has ill will towards the fish, right. You're saying, but you know, doesn't doing anything to prevent. And that's why I don't resent them. But the people in the Bengals people who I am counter. As I go across football America love to come up to me and say, oh, we're we're not gonna get along wise at 'cause you're a Steelers guy, and I root for one of the teams, and I laugh. Roeber in the elevator talking to the underling writer at the ad firm. Like, I don't think about you at all. Well, Draper is a classic example of who the Browns are because the Browns aren't even the Browns. The Browns are another team. You know what I mean like? You know, what I mean like the Browns drain the name. He took the name. You know, heavy I even about that. Right. Not even who it is. I mean, listen wouldn't have. Oh, hi, Brian Sipe Browns is what I'm saying. I love it. And you know what? And by the way, somehow Samra Tig Liano, retain, fighted know that the tags was still. Blue marble, but he he's weighing in on the Browns coaching, hire, this thrill me as a matter. Not your team retakes. It's not your team love it. And you know, what I love Morag was he coach Gregg took the took the bungles to a Super Bowl force. Greg to me was always a guy in a very long down coat. One of those down not a trench coat, but like a regular coat that you are. I would it would stop at our mid thigh. Forrest. Gregg had it down to the shin. Every time he was a man of style. And also deserves extra points for having a surname as a regular name in a regular name is a surname like we were in a cab in New York. And the guy's name was Mohammed. Larry, we're like that can't be. And yet you must celebrate it when you find these loved absolutely loved him immediately. I'll say this. I, you know, first of all when you start talking retake Liano that and then forced Greg for that matter in the emperor. Chaz know of. In that same era was was the late and truly great bum. Phillips, one of the all-time, quote machines, one of the all-time characters, and I'd like to make you aware and for you and your brother can lend your celebrity voices two to further push this this move along. I contacted Wade Phillips sometime ago because everybody likes those old Rams get ups. You know, the goal not not the ones that they're wearing the I don't like the white. I'm not a fan, but the the the sort of the really yellowish the garage, I blew. Yeah. That's the correct call. This is Wendy not deacon Jones. This is Merlin Olsen, Jack young blood. Fred dryer every time I see that uniform. I wanna give someone enough TD florist. Them K from FT. Amen. Amen. I said when they wear those throwbacks, wouldn't it be neat? If Wade Phillips honored his his old, man and went out and dressed lab cowboy right? He wore the ten I mean, this was an NFL head coach imagine this young people within the sound of our voices. There was an NFL head coach. And you think it was funny that like you think it's funny to see an eighty year old man sitting in a baseball dugout dress like a baseball, Matt we've always said this to make managers wear the uniform themselves is fucking ridiculous. It's very funny. And I assume it's for our team for old people. That's right now, what would be great is if a bump film. So he this was an age. We're now everybody like the only thing you ever hear about as far as how coaches dress themselves as that Bill Belichick dresses like a Hobo. But back when we were growing up like there was Landry foot door. They had look. All these guys was dying Phillips walked the he patrolled the NFL sidelines. Cowboy hat big belt buckle Jit cowboy boots labute's Wrangler yet, whatever they were either dress pants or boot cut and the flannel cowboy cut Bushell shirt with and this was giving out orders. Hey, Curley comb now go do this. Now, I don't know about that. Now and retake Leon. Oh, and all that what if Wade Phillips paid? Oh my gosh. To the league. That look, and he has now I will tell you. He is DM me and told me stop. He told me do they hold it. He said he would like to do it. He cannot do it during a game because of rig licensing thing or whatever with Nike. Listen cowboy hat for. I said I this mom-and-pop shop Nike could use my marketing help, and my is put a Swu Shana cowboy Sean McAvoy had I'm so with you. Let me tell you one more thing. Sure. And then I wanna dig into this NFL weird in Ohio. It's an irrelevant state. I think we can all agree for the most part. Now, what what how it earned its keep way back when in the nineteenth century, you know, they did a lot of trade on the on the river Hieaux river, the mighty Ohio would move your product up and down. But of course, take a closer. Look where does that Ohio form win the Allegheny Managua halo converge on the banks of the three rivers? What is get credit for our river. Our river Burg's wherever they should be the mean Joe river should be the Lemieux river not the Ohio river, it should be the mccutchen river. Okay. I mean, maybe how about the Cobra. Dave parker. Marino river. Okay. If you need me, I'll give you a John Milner a Mike Easley river, if you will any stand I'll get a Manny sand Gannon platoon that river. So so let's talk about the NFL season. Because every thought that knows going to beat the Rams, and then all of a sudden, not everybody. But all the sudden they had to go play in the super. It was the Superdome. I don't even know what that thing's called in there. The whatever the down. Superdome where eighty dome writing get sued by the saints or anybody whatever called for where the saints play in knowledge. And they they kind of couldn't stop them. I mean, it was like this team. And by the way, Aaron Donald broke free on a couple of and knock some people over in a way that you just don't see it was like a pop Warner game where he just not literally stepped over someone in knocked over the Alvin Kamara like knocked Alvin kamera's nose ring out of his goddamn knows. But like you said, they can't stop them. So now, you're like, well, wait a minute. I thought it was a foregone conclusion that the Rams are just going to go and you say to yourself. Wait a minute drew Brees has more. He's a Super Bowl champion. He knows what he's doing. There are couple of moves. He made in there in the pocket where he stepped up and avoided getting set by this vaunted defense in a way that I'm like maybe Goff. Can't do that. I don't know. I changed my opinion a little well, first of all. Perhaps we'll see something different come the second half of the season, which I guess we're into it. This point at this point. Everybody needs to think more globally as the cliche goes and act local and not just be a yet. Don't just look at your little corner of football, America. But look all over. Here's here's what will make Rams fans feel a little bit better or chiefs fans or anyone else. No one plays defense in two thousand eighteen there is no sign that. There is such a thing as dominant defense in the league right now have been good we insert weeks. But they haven't been consistently good throughout like the couldn't stop Miami. And you're saying, wait a minute. They can't that Miami. The jets look like they're stopping Miami. Why can't the bear stop Miami? But you know, it was hot. It was humid. It was in Miami. But you know, and fair let's see keep it going here. That's I mean, obviously, they can only go so far. If Trubisky is in it at Wor at worst may. League median, I don't know that he will. But yeah, I mean that's legitimately true. This in two thousand eighteen really take a look at it. It's all about quarterbacks are still massively important they have been forever. But certainly in the last decade had to have one of the name brand QB's, and you know, maybe Nick foles kinda disrupted that a little bit. Maybe Joe flacco a half dozen years ago person wins deserve Ryan can Nick foles go on the road and win you a playoff game now. But even if you want to wanna play that game for the most part it's Brady it was Peyton breeze Rothlisberger Rogers, Russell Wilson. These are the teams that were making deep playoff runs most years. But now all of a sudden it occurs to me. It's not the QB as much as it is the offensively creative, and the that's it you think about it is Sam darnold. Do you think Sam darnold as not going to be as good as Jared Goff? Maybe. He won't be as good as twenty eighteen Jared Goff. But is there really that big a difference between those two guys, of course, not one is stuck in Byzantine twentieth. Century offense in New York. And the other is with Sean McVeigh who is underpinned and genius and Todd Gurley everything. And by the way, we always talk about guys who are younger than us who are now in charge of these NFL offenses, and they is so much younger than it's embarrassing. The our kids if literally and his Adly trick if we made mistakes and high school, I mean, he could be. I didn't talk to girl. So I make no mistake. But yes, but amidst all that all these innovative young guys. And even Josh mcdaniels still counts as that. Andy Reid is the real deal bunch of frauds who get the the tag of QB whisper, and you know, offense of genius and whatever. But Andy Reid is every QB good anyone who he's ever worked with Alex Smith still good they lost. But like he didn't like just lose all the knowledge that Andy read gave you work with. Andy Reid is a QB. You will be good. And now he has the best of them. And you know, that that team not coincidentally is is you know, maybe going to the Super Bowl, maybe. But I don't think they'd beat the patriots. Like again, there was that moment where the patriots played them and said, no like we're foreign to. But no, I don't care who you are. I don't care how much firepower you have. I don't care. How many people Kareem hunt hurdles standing fully straight and upright? I don't care. I heard Jay talking just before he he may. Made his way out. Let's interesting that you mentioned Jay because he's back now jump at him. Oh, okay. So you you heard me what patriots? Listen. It's a gut punch to me to say this. You're exactly right. We can talk about Patrick Mahomes. Oh, it's so much fun to Shawn Watson who the Steelers putting it together. The right time. Phil rivers can he finally crest up over the curse of the football gods and get the Super Bowl. It's all just it's just all filler. Obviously Brady's going back. They're going to win again. Well, he's going back. But I will say this about the chargers because I watched that I watched here's how I watched the chargers. Seattle game yesterday. I watched the first half. And I watched Seattle marched down on them and score right away. And I said to myself. Okay. Seattle's maybe they're back there on their home field. Maybe this team is going to kinda rise up and show you who they really are. And be kind of like that that gutsy gritty ten and six team that you don't wanna face in the playoffs because they've got a lot of pizza making always just rise up and be good. And you. Never wanna play. Russell Wilson sixty minute thing ever because he can speed in just as amazing now I stopped watching because I had to do something in between I stopped watching for turnabout. And the chargers are up like up by a lot. And I was like oh my God. This is the charges the charges used to be one in five and then stormed back running back. Who is you know, who was the running back for all those years? It was Darren sproles nature own me means I mean, obviously, we're going back that far they had one of the greatest running backs of all time Thomas. After they haven't had that guy. Melvin Gordon is that guy that is a guy care the fumbled problem. He's a he's a workhorse. He's like that rare. Mix of he's durable enough that he's not gonna get. Yeah. I'm trying to think of he delivers a shot to win when you try to tackle him. He's one of those kind of runners who really finishes it off and punishes you for trying to get in his way. I'm with you on the chargers, and I'll Pat myself on the back my preseason pick Rams chargers in the Super Bowl. I now that looks really good. If the football gods can take their iron boot off of the poor chargers and let both tackles come back healthy on the offense of Sidon and get you both back in there. Because if you put Ingram in their a LA put both in there along with Ingram, and and Derwin James is a female ready. Amazing. Unbelievable. I am really impressed with their defense. And I have to say Philip rivers. We've always said this. He can get. More wins than kids that he has. He's got eight kids so jout he has a chance of getting that look at the to do that smudge sued around seven wins right now they do. And also, by the way, you talk about quality wins quality losses. Their two teams that they lie. They couldn't beat the chiefs in LA, really. That's their one loss. And there are other one is who else beat the chargers. I can't remember. But I know was a close one. And I know it was back and forth. The Rams say within it was I had a point those are the two teams that some people are saying could you know, you could see all I know is that look I would love to not have to see the patriots in there again. However, you can't deny them and you talk about defense not being thing. I watched that game last night. And I said to myself God there were so many moments where Aaron Rodgers you just see how brilliant he is in the little pick and pops like I'm gonna throw it to this guy and get seven yards out this way when they needed him at the end when they needed. They Gotcha dollop the defense in the back. The backfield out of nowhere nowhere. They dial up the D they stop it. And you just say to yourself this handing off to a guy with eighty four on his jersey. I'm like, it's craz one of the reasons they are just like get that guy off the street and Brady throw eight passes to them. They don't you see what it's about. They mocked mcdaniels are laughing at it right now. But that like mistake pass that like Brady threw that like almost feel like the wrong guy. Caught it right at the end just walked into the walk. They they are in on the heels of Boston winning the World Series. You just say to yourself what the fuck like we can have almost like God said. Bill simmons. You wanted winning? You wanted some winning? We're going to give you so much winning that you won't know what that means anymore. It won't. So when I send you in the cli- Gartner six I went with my wife to Napa we went to Napa for for our first anniversary, and we scheduled all these dinners at and meals at great places, and they were just really good. It was an anniversary. We're going to go all out, and we were gonna like didn't have kids yet. We're spending money on ourselves in a way that you don't when you have kids. So we go go through it. I first amazing second meal. Unbelievable third meal. I'm like, I am not that hungry fourth meal. I literally sat down the fourth night. And I'm like, I fucking hate this place. So joke on you. Boston is on there. I think of he's like to me the Representative of the Boston fan. We have tons of friends who are Boston fans. Suffer. They got to look in the eighties two thousand ten. That's exactly I don't wanna hear about the suffering. You're not suffering like Cleveland suffered when Cleveland finally won the championship. You said yourself that is that is a long suffering town people of Boston. Here's here's my my beef with the with the Boston sports fan. They're the only one that I'm aware of the only gaggle of of fans they at one point. I don't know if it's still around, but Nessin their local, you know, sports channel they actually had a show on with Red Sox fans telling stories about where they were watching this game or that they actually are so narcissistic, then it was about the about. Here's here's the pain and angst. I have suffered just anecdotes shared with each other. What's wrong with you? Go to someone who's living up in buffalo under eleven feet of snow. I want to hear that. So so I really do think. I just think no one's going to be the like when it when it's they're going to have the winds to have at least one home game. If not both as always because I don't know what it is that makes this so and I referred the football gods having it in for Phil rivers and the chargers in general. I don't know what Tom Brady ballot. Check have on the forementioned gods. But the greatest gift today ever got was being put into AFC east where the greatest challenge and this isn't exaggeration. Remember the greatest challenge that the Brady patriots have ever had within their division. Was Mark Sanchez is jets for about two years. That was the biggest rival. So they've ever had the confront. I mean, look you are finding Ryan Tanna hills wife leaving a gun in a rental car that she brought back. Right. So there's on city in her own city who rents a car in their own city. All right. So but the idea eighty the idea that yes, they're going to win their division. There's no question. There's no one even. It's there they could sleep walk the five. And in all likelihood six wins annually where everybody else I'm a Steeler fan. I don't like having the play. The ravens twice. I don't like having to play in the bum bungles because you know, berthed at minimums gonna try and take out. But so okay Steelers play the ravens yesterday dispense with the ravens beat them by seven should have been more. But you don't ever have because somebody just decided to like sit on his elbow like essentially, just that's tackle like go for his legs and trip him up and went up, but that the tax trying to hurt you wanna hurt this one hundred sixty pounds on the ground. Yeah. And with glee he did it as soon as he got up off of. Elbow. Chest. Got the way as it turned out. He just got the wind knocked out of him. I thought the funnier detail from that game. If you if you caught any of it was that that all season long. Now flacco is raw. And you know, this thing of that you if you're if you're up if you're a high profile QB and you're not atrocious. And you've invested four or five years as a franchise now, you must go in for the big deal the twenty plus million dollar deal. Cuba now, everybody does this weather. The guy deserves it or not the time. They do not say, but go get your money because usually played like Leon belly. I think last year he was playing for like three hundred thousand dollars. I kinda don't I don't begrudge. It's gotten a little weird for him the way the season has gone on. But. Flaco obviously, the ravens charm city would have been burnt down. If I mean. Yeah. Charm city, wait, there's the crescent city the charm city in the Queen city charm city. Would have been burnt down city well in charm city because when flacco went to the crescent city and one that Super Bowl, they couldn't very well, then say as an organization for the second time, they're the only organization ever to boot the starting quarterback of a Super Bowl for the start of this vaccine in all fairness turnover needed to go. I would agree except that his replacement was Elvis gearbox a great Michigan. I take out my. Yes. So of course, they had to keep flacco they, but but have dozen years later, clearly Joe flacco is not one of those guys who can carry an NFL offense weaken, and we out he has his moments. I that playoff run is one of them. But he's not somebody who week in and week is going to do it. But so the ravens draft his replacement and Lamar Jackson and flacco can say whatever he wants his actions speak louder than words. He he literally if you've been watching him he is the statue of liberty when they Jackson into the game under center, and they split flacco out. He stands there and refuses to move runner out. He won't do anything large Jackson, by the way. Let me contend that. He actually is moving that is him living. I watched flacco rollout. And I was like are we watching an old timers game? I could not believe how I saw Rosberg run in that game. And I'm like that dude is like slow and cannot either he gonna light a fire between his legs. But like he can't his legs. Don't do long strides. Any it's our most popular. Yeah. That's exactly. Yeah. 'cause rothlisburger for the first half of his career could move. I make it move little bit. I would love to see. I mean, it's our most popular sport, the the most important most high highest paid position in American sport. It's ironic that they are among the worst, athletes and any of the three of us could take fill rivers com Brady or Ben Rothlisberger out onto the street right now and beat them in a foot race and desperately slum. You are desperately slow and we're slower than you. It's it's amazing. But you know, you look at Tom Brady, and you're like he has figured out a way to completely longevity in all the take in movies is a very specific skills, and they work in they work if about and he. He has figured out an offense and Josh mcdaniels and those guys figured out offense where he won't get hit may identify great. The the the goat for a moment. Okay. Fine. He he beat Aaron Rogers. He they win almost always. But the one thing is that nobody really talks about is the thing that they do the thing that Josh mcdaniels. What's crazy is is that the rest of the NFL doesn't just straight up mimics slut off is. I mean, he's a he's a forty something year old, man. And it's great niece. You know, he's in good health and works out all the time and videos about what is regime, what is work our Jeeva drinks concussion. Juice, all of doesn't like the reverse. Yeah. But let's let's talk about what really goes on. And that offense. It's it's all dump off the James light. That's all they do. Think everybody do that. On Louis or whoever else and just do that constantly. It's I'm going to take it from the shotgun. So I'm taking one step back RTD been thing. Protect me for two seconds, and then two seconds. And then and then and then it's out of my hands. Unbelievable. All right. So if we have to predict right now, let's do this. And then we've got some quick hits that will do on the other side this if we had to predict right now where who who is in the who is in the Super Bowl and who wins this year. I will say this the one thing here's the punchers chance the AFC and anyone who's rooting for anyone. But the patriots and want to see some new blood get to a Super Bowl. The one thing that that is is interesting thing because you would assume it's the other way around is Bella Chac when teams get a second look at him in a season the that team fares better not were you would think. Ballot. Check on. He gets sixty minutes a tape on you. You're you're done for it. In fact, it's the other way you get the study what the page because all they do. It's all about for them. And I've talked with guys, you know, Willie mcginest to to namedrop has said it's all predicated, and this is a probably overly simplistic. But still he said it's all about that. They are gay. Gambling that the other teams offense of coordinator slash QB have too big ego to just take what they give them the whole game. Whereas Brady will do that for sixty minutes. Check down check down check down. And then he'll win the game. And at some point Ben Rothlisberger. Fill rivers whoever else. Go up cap. I got this. I got I gotta make this offense vertical. I got a school guys running the floor. I thought Pat Mahomes has a little something else because he can move a little bit. Kinda get he unsettles their about Mahomes. And this is the only reason why this we're talking about the chiefs at all in week ten week nine where she's if they if the pats went out and the chiefs went out, which by the way could happen might not. I don't think it will. Because I think that she's play the Rams the Rams are going to beat the chiefs. But the pats went on the out chiefs have home field advantage in Mexico City. No less. Well, maybe the Steelers can do a favor and knocked the patriots off. Yes. Still much football the play. But you so you think patriots emerge and ranch sheets have a real shot, especially if you get just in Houston alongside d for it. And then Eric berry on the back end the defenses horse in offering host. Host Bella check will. They got caught on horses at this game. Never had that check rides out. I forgot I'm so. Over here on your sideline. No. I do think. Because of the fact that like hunt and and Kelsey playing so well, there's just so much. There's like a lot of wetter leak hill is to kill. There's a lot there. Multiple guys who can damage you. And if you shut one down, they'll just go another direction blow up the entire thing that everybody has said since ballot check out there. He you know, he's gonna take away the one guy who can kill you. Which is that on the on the chiefs offense. They are all they're all they're all killers. And they're all there are a lot of guys and Mahomes himself is a guy who can extend to play in a Russell Wilson sort of a way. So maybe chiefs chiefs, I like the chargers chargers go with it. It's time I like them too. And I think when Mike Williams is like your third option. Yeah, right option that Keenan Allen is someone said before the year that Keenan Allen is going to have the best year this year, Wayne's Keenan Kenan lanes one of my favorites. And he. Is he's having one of the best is really having an amazing year. Of course, they're just I think they're stacked in the right way in their defense is really good. And like you said if they started to get some of those other pieces back in there still winning before they get those back. I say watch out I would not want. I just throw in the Rams, obviously the saints now more obvious than they were forty eight hours ago after taking down the Rams the one other one that is intriguing is the Vikings because a dalvin cook all the money can go to Kirk cousins. And but Zimmer's getting that defense go and again, Kirk cousins is good enough. They have dynamic pass catchers. But if and cook back there is anything close to what he was before. He got the injury. And he looked good. If you play play off game, they're they're going to open the roof intentionally. Grateful that they don't for fucking roof. I mean diggs is legit legit to deland is Evan like the best year ever feeling is the new Jordy Nelson. Literally. Jordy all the receivers and football's all, right? Let's take a break showy. And then we'll come back and do a little quick with Dave damasec. I you heard it you had predicted. Although you'd never said who was gonna win the whole thing win the whole thing anybody page. Do you think the Rams are gonna win it? You heard it here. Priors Davidge Shak says the Rams of the best shot, and he might not going that everyday swan role talks with more David on cheesy. Evidence. Hey, dump people town listeners. I wanna tell you along with Jason Sklar. What's up guys about a new podcast at that delivers chilling true crime stories straight to your mobile device, if you're into this stuff, and I know so many people are the popularity of my favorite murderer and our show crime baby drew crime, everyday we released a new episode that investigates the gruesome acts of America's worst serial killers explore into the minds of psychopaths murderers, again, it's fascinating me. I believe it gets sent to your phone. It's a daily dose of true crime creep in it's delivered straight to your mobile device the murder minute at learn what kind of trophies Ted Bundy collected an where he kept him. Who was Louise gar Gara vodka? I wanna find wanna know. But I'm scared scared, and I wanna know. That's what it is become a true crime expert with actual facts about well known and lesser known serial killers. Why do they call? David Parker Ray. The toy box question for now. 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We get your apps on your mobile device. Agreed. Hey, townies Daniel van Kirk. I want to tell you about a brand new podcast. I'm very excited about it's called macula. Conception Maqlid conception is a limited podcast series from Starbucks audio. That follows a married couple Abby and Isaac full disclosure. I know both of them there. Craig people. They're very funny. The very entertaining. And they're very smart. They want to talk about their complicated and emotional quest to start a family while struggling within fertility you need to listen to this podcast. Because now they're in their third year of an vitro, fertilization treatment, Abby and Isaac have documented their experience. They share their hopes dreams, doctor's appointments and late night fights and an up close personal. And sometimes funny look at a couple longing to become parents in real time. The first episode of macula conception is out right now. So check it out wherever you get your pod. Casts everybody. Welcome back from the cheap seats. Dave damn shook. A great follow on the Twitter's at just at damasec. That's it at damn shake. And do you do the Instagram as well? I recently begun dipping my toes into those waters. Yes. And what is that same thing damage damage shack? Pretty sure I don't I damage check on Twitter, especially if you are a you're great. You're great tweeter during the NFL season during that like during that time, you're going tweeter anytime because you have great takes on the world on right now, you gotta jump on board. Because if you want to two more months of some great observations, and then yeah, then the trail goes cold podcasts. All right. Yeah. Podcast. Yes. But I will also say Daves of thunder. Now back people who may remember that from seven years or so ago, my friend, David Feeney, deeply funny guy. And I crack wise about this that and the other checkout Daves of thunder. But also the damage Schick football program on the NF. NFL is great. And I have to say this. I don't wanna derail anything I'll make it quick thing. I the the Sklar brothers. Listen. That's right. You know, what I'm a noted hanger on. And so people always ask me. What's blank, really like, I always feel it's important to point this out deeply talented super funny guys. And all that the one thing when if the if Sklar brothers come up everybody, it's a it's really is quite a thing. Everybody says nicest guys there aren't any nicer guys. Trying their loving. They really try hard. Well, I wanna get into this quick. I don't know how much you can save just based on the fact that you are implied by okay. Y'all have talked about the kneeling, and it is what it is where we were. Look, I didn't know if it was about the cell phone no scandal in New Orleans or what? No, we talked about that too. But I'm talking about San Francisco. Leader knelt during the national. Did you see that? She took a knee. And I was like go girl. What are they gonna do? Take your pay away. Don't pay him. Anyway. Sixteen million dollars after party at a hall of fame is all can't give a hundred thousand Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders. The by Connick cheerleading team out there. It is. I tell you that is an interesting play on her part because I hadn't really thought it through the first rally for is she going to get fired, and you really it would be a tough thing hard fire right there because you go. Well, first of all very different to do that on a field in San Francisco than it is to Tennessee or inject fair, your in whatever. But beyond that the rationalization against it is these guys are making millions of dollars which right misses the alternate point. Anyway, but you can't use that excuse when you're talking about the. It was kind of awesome to see her take that knee. And and what if let me? His standing one. Let me ask you this. What if a couple of black cops cops will work in their took a knee. Then one you know what I'm saying? Like they're themselves because they are black cop African American cop organizations that represent black. They're like we support the players who are doing what if they do that. Then what I mean? Then where does this argh except for the fact that guys in the military active or otherwise, you know, heroes from wars past have spoken up. I'm not saying. Haven't there? Across the border. But there are there are plenty of military men and women out there who have already said, yes, this is what we fought for this is your right as an American, and it's part of what we defended when we fought now billeted. Ability to Asia right on that side. I'm saying if blackouts. As made no impact. You're right. You're okay. It's. What's ratings up this year ratings in the NFL? She in a lot of games. And a lot of ways we all. There was this sort of fake thing thrown out there by the White House at the rating was fake. They're not they're not down there. In fact, they're up and she would say there is more excitement around the league than in years half. And this is like even with all the quote unquote controversies, but I love seeing this because we always said like what is the cheerleader doing an NFL? I get in in college cheerleaders. Start the go blue. They get you totally understand it in who is showing up in an NFL game going. I don't know what to do here. What are we rooting? Let's look to the chillers to tell us what's going on. I'm fascinated by and I guess I've kinda turned around because I have heard anecdotal evidence that I mean, it's the same thing with the halftime shows. I'm not going to watch. I think I'm raw about it still because I think my first experience ever with a halftime performer was is. Right. When it started. They had Cheryl crow at Heinz field when the mighty Steelers at I believe thirteen and three were playing host to the upstart doing limpets a week removed from the snow game. The tuck rule game the infamous one and they came in. And the Steelers were supposed to win by by ten points or there about it was going to be quick work then onto New Orleans for for the Super Bowl against the Saint Louis Rams. And instead it was fourteen three at halftime. The the the locals were none too pleased. And then over the PA it was announced, ladies and gentlemen issues. Recording our share crow and Sheryl Crowe. First words into the microphone like how you doing? Pittsburgh. This is like a comedian doing casino. Lost money shirt. Gonna give it up for your straight out your daughter, come on. But yes, I never watched. Yes. I don't care about. Oh, wait, wait, who's playing halftime? The song they played between third and fourth quarter at Heinz field renegade. So they play renegade. And that is supposedly there's juju that comes out of that they not Schuster like actual like teams juju Smith Schuster that comes out of that. But like to me, the only person that you'd ever come and play and Tommy Tommy. And have them come play. Renegade. And everyone gets moved up. No Pittsburgh fan when Queen anymore. Yeah. That he gonna make the scene at this point. You're right that that people doubted that he was gained the name of the band was all right? So. W W followed. It will. You're probably a WWF fan when you were. Junkyard dog. I'm your Threadneedle. They're j y. Koko wear Gobi where little. His shoulder special delivery to me, the the one of the greatest things ever is that I've that my eyes have ever taken in. And we and maybe it was too much. We saw too many times. So we don't really realize how great it was. But Jake, the snake would would defeat someone and then that wasn't because he would DDT them. So then they were out there. They they weren't chemical. We put on crops. He would go. Put a snake on? But a snake which snakes just sitting in that bag? Bad for the guy laying on the run confusing for this. This. What I do. You know in a sack now, they're fifteen act where people were scre I heard muffled screams ever. Now, I'm coming out at a predatory situation where it's already did too. Sweaty mass of humanity. Oh, it's King Kong. Be what? King king gong Bundy. Here's the deal so constantly as long as Vince McMahon is in charge. Yes. Great entertainer knows. But constantly shooting the whole Saudi Arabia crown jewel of you've heard about this ridiculous. Who's it for? It's literally just a money. Grab for the WWE no-one is clamoring to see this happen. Especially after Saudi Arabia, kill the fucking journalist. All right. So people Southie. Pitino dropped out out. Smartly CNN dropped I like that someone out Daniel Bryan, we met at the NFL network. He was wearing a Seahawks jersey about our height. Really cool. You're kidding our. He's like, I'm not going to do it. Then they call pogo. Yeah. Like like anything sense? I'll bring a bone saw right? But there is that moment where you say to yourself. What are you doing WB? I was watching on John Oliver show like they showed a clip of like a wrestler, the undertaker the current undertaker like a huge fan favorite crowd going wild. And he's like eats onset crowd going nuts from grabs the microphone. He's like at crown jewel in Saudi Arabia. They start Billingham. People who are like they don't want people don't want to see who is that wrestling for. Why are you're over there? That's right. That appeals to really then diagramme of American in of America in the sensibilities and as conflicted in different is they may be. No, yeah. Who is supporting the World Cup going to yet? Where are they going to Yemen Qatar Qatar Qatar they're going there, and they have to change the season that they're playing the World Cup a thing that has always been in the summertime forever is now going to be in the wintertime during like forty one hundred and they can't cluelessly and people were dying. Like, why don't do it? Why don't you just took a? About rain you have to they haven't killed the journalists that we know of. But a Bali say all I know is it's like it tells you exactly where hulk HOGAN is that he'll say yesterday. And it tells you exactly where McMahon is that. He has no problem doing Johnson is like I'll be in movies now bringing back the XFL. This will not go over. I Vince McMahon's one of those people who nothing really sticks man is like Donald Trump. It's like tell me I can't do challenge me. Tell me. I can't do it. Do it and failed spectacularly I'll blame someone else. That's right. I it's really as as I always say, it's the equivalent of only one person being allowed to take steroids in a sport. You know, how does he do like because he's tethered from the same standards as anybody else? He not worried about the what's. He's not he's not conflicted at all speaking dildos for sex not throwing the field during he saw that bills game. We all. Yeah. Repeatedly kick Florida man was arrested. In in in cockapoo. I guess that we're calling it now. Okay. On the field during a bills hats game. And just I mean, did you have multiple dildo? What was hap- went out? And then this guy Florida man, obviously, probably not good at shielding. I mean, you know, who's the real culprits, the the people doing the frisking, obviously. But the damage that is the moment where you say to yourself like their million reasons why you would never want to take your kid who's like eight nine or ten to NFL game. You just gave me like four more that fluent those. Like, I mean does he throwing them low kind of over his head around? They got deep into the end zone. Because you know, it it is somebody brings the beach ball in the Dodger Stadium and bounce. The, you know, our our quaint little practice of bounce at a beach ball around the stands at Dodger Stadium eight is it a joint effort like somebody from the top row throw. And then you feel something in the back. What? Out of it. Is it? I mean, it is. Deal kicking drunken behavior at its finest. We were in we were in buffalo. You're doing shows there. People are so drunk in the wintertime in buffalo and in the summertime they told us for a while. Uber wouldn't work in buffalo. You know, why? Because people were cool with driving home drunk, so. Driver killed over. All right. So like for a while in buffalo that is the prevailing. Shit fry up Abedi. This guy's a Florida man came up, and it's like don't like don't make us Bill fan bills fans. Look we have enough that we're dealing with. Right. We got shady McCoy whatever's going Smith is gonna answer a question about deal does on the field. That guy's a classy guy. It's all a big distraction. What are you the the Buffalo Bills? I know what else? But that they also have the sabers. I mean, it really bellyaching anywhere else in America. I mean, how soon Dominic Hosh it just comes back to do one game just to get butts in the one hand, they you know, they do temp again Schick years there. They were good for unbelievable. But you know, why they didn't win the Stanley Cup because you don't change your team colored willy nilly that to sell more jerseys. They they're they're this electric blue and gold striking get up then one day they gave out under the ice. Now. They're black red and silver. Now the hurricanes. Are you? You're not you're the Carolina Hurricanes. They changed their name. I've I've said this to you because I've said this to a million people million times over now say for the million, and I maybe the bills and has something to do with the fact that they are in buffalo a city name for the majestic beast that once roamed our planes, and they named the football team after buffalo Bill, Cody the man primarily responsible for trying to render said based extinct from the. What is the thinking? You are in buffalo. You don't name it after the guy tried to kill all the right and wouldn't be a guy shooting of buffalo. Not the buffalo that he was trying to stay him. Enjoy they should be what the Colorado college football. This should be the buffalo, Buffalo's five bison what other? Rested. May I don't know if he's dead, but bison day. Yeah, he disappeared. See he here, which is really. I mean, it's if you're going to go do it at least on your parents. John when he left doing what he loved the most being. Here we go. Yeah. It's a sports podcasts at I'm gonna drop little camera, obscure obscure, Lloyd. I'm ready to be heartbroken. That's Bill saying I'm ready to be heartbroken. I'm a fucking bills. Give it to me. Dave damasec. Thank you so much. Joining us. Shleifer doing this. Again, follow him on Twitter at damasec at D davick on Instagram listen to his podcast Daves of thunder. And of course, the Dave damage Shak football program lets it what is it. That's it. I still video component to that. As well. Dot com slash DSP. It's a phenomenon and if you are fan of of his takes on the NFL so that goes so much deeper in a weird away. The most people go check that stuff out when we come back on the other side is a voicemail from Ozzy began. The dodgers job may be opened. He is really looking for more cheesy. Take a moment and talk about a really cool online betting review side called bet. DS I dot com. They've been paying winners for you ready for this twenty years twenty years, use your sports knowledge to make some extra cash and a lot of people are listening to this podcast. If you are listening by a lot of you are sports fans, you have a tremendous amount of knowledge now, go get paid for it. Go online to are easy to use mobile site, fastest payouts in the industry play win get paid. That's how they do. It. Bet DS offers betting options for everything, but on football and all other major sports politics. Reality TV e sports, virtually everything bet to see if I wish they could bet to see who's funnier. Randy Jason we got to put that on there. Somehow try a live betting at bet DS where you can bet on every play every drive every score until the final whistle blows. Which is really cool. Use the promo code seats eighteen seats. Eighteen first time deposit with a hundred percent bonus match of your money up to your ever this five hundred dollars. That's pretty amazing. They're going to match that right there. I play there myself. I've tried it. It is really cool. Just to be able to bet in game is is super cool. It kind of like and when he wants to stop. But if want to keep going, you can bet on everything like they said to the last whistle. I think it's really fun. I think you can do it. And enjoy it for all the games that you're watching especially now the football season is going college football pro football. Once again, go to bet decide dot com. Use the promo code seats. Eighteen and get limited time hundred percent bonus up to five hundred dollars. It's only a game until you bet it at bet DS I. I welcome back to view from the cheap seats. Dave damasec. Love him love that we had him this week with all the lady on bell stuff is a big Pittsburgh, dude. And Ben Rothlisberger. What's going to happen to him? And really the fate of the NFL the guys so deepen at I just love his takes on all that stuff. He's one of our favorite people in one of the people we take away from working there at the NFL network and are just so happy that he's in our lives. Hey, guys, as we promised very special voicemail from Ozzy Ghia. And you know, there may be a job open. If Dave Roberts doesn't get his contract together in Los Angeles in the doors for our friend as again, and I know nothing with lifted spirits higher than to get a major league baseball job and one that Plum in a town where I feel like there's enough bars around the stadium for him to enjoy. So he left his voicemail. Let's hear his thoughts on potentially taking day Robert spot as the dodge. Gers manager check it out. These go to you about these. I don't how about you. That I can be this guy. Don't they rubber Heo ruin Clayton Kershaw? Hey, ruin the cartel. Cortott? Have nothing on a tank. He think too much. Yes, grenell. Hey playing mocks monkey. Playing naughty. Hip plan Nadi with the guy. Got y'all Tara from the guy. Ring. Much more pick two. Dave on a contract. The money for the law. I don't know you all. Oh meal. There you go again. I miss him. Maybe we'll get him in here. It will get him here for the end of the year big character show a love him. I don't think he's going to get the job because say that outright. But hey can't fault. The guy for trying whatever he does get them on some Lexa pro got around those edges a little bit. This is ruthless. He's not ruthless. He's a good, dude. By the marinas. We have the Sklar brothers. We will see you. If you were an Austin tonight in Austin to show tonight to show tomorrow at calf city comedy club. What a great club that is if you're in Austin come see US Cup more dates just on the horizon. We'll be in Saint Louis doing a great benefit for project. Wakeup the buddy, Tim Conway and some other great local comics shaman nod in the auditorium. We'll do that on the twenty four that's a Saturday after thanksgiving. What he what are you gonna do on the Senate to what are you gonna do that in the Saturday after thanksgiving, but come out and see us? I want to come check that out. We got shows in LA. We're going to be doing a live people town Largo December ten do alive. Don't be able to. San Francisco sketch best on January eleventh inches the day for birthday at ten thirty at cobb's comedy club. Flappers we're gonna headline on December. Twentieth. Give your in LA, come see us headline. We'll probably some good friends on that show to go to superstars dot com. Check all that stuff out by the way in Austin. We've got punch waterfall shirts and hats, come check that awesome stuff out. Check it all out fluffy, crate dot com. These Marie we love them. And we'll be out. But have a great great week. Enjoy this sports time of year. The best time of year punch waterfalls cenex week. Shoe?

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Aired Last month 23:44

107 - What if tigers lost their stripes?

Vert if. What if you? If you buy travel back inside, welcome. Hey there folks in welcome back to what if world the show where your questions and ideas. Inspire off the cuff stories, I missed arugula host. And today we've got a question from Stacey. Hi, my name. And I love tiger. And I wanted to stay and I. And my mother is what tiger's laughter, right? What if Tigers lost their stripes? Stacey I wanna thank you for being so patient waiting to get your question answered. We have a patron who asked a question that started off the very same way. Let's hear cici's question. My question is what? Hi last. Right. And the puck tricks to terror renters Dakyns eighteen. Like that. Unicorn amaury. The claims triple. Thank you. I love what I four. I are. So. Oh, my. Date. Yeah. We love what it. Well. You to have both. We did a long time to get your question answered. But Oliver and William and also Sam Dave way, did a very long time to get their shoutout to own your, right? Thank you all ever, William and Sam. Yeah. Thanks bash for to'sink metoo give you a shout. I think give the Moshe doubts are like, maybe I should just be the host of this show from no one, Fred I appreciate your enthusiasm. But being the host is a lot of work after accord the show, and edit and posted. Yeah. I don't want to do that. How I just do stuff that fun for me. And you are the work. Gestion everybody got to depart. Okay. Thanks for coming on the show, your work. Mr. attic on a here to give a big tank. You the James who? Oh, yeah. Caleb. Just got a question answered. And we're really glad to have he and his brother James as a patron or you by the eve of goes believe it does here an another big shout out to Titus and JJ two of our listeners from South Korea. I hear that the berry. Nice kind we. Yeah. One of my best friends lives out there jumping apart better go visit or South Korea one day, I hope so pipe, yo please take me with you. If you do now, let's find out what if Tigers lost their stripes and also a FOX with two tails games as Agassi's house and cats at unicorn horns and unicorns had triple hordes. She's good it. No good. Cecilia Taylor was a two tailed vox. She was running through the woods. Just a few feet in front of the galloping. Gait of a ferocious tiger tiger growled and roared and Cecilia Taylor. Could barely stay ahead. Gonna make it to see the burst into a clearing and saw house at the edge of the woods with its door. Open. Just a crack Tiga pounce into that same clearing landing right on top of the two tailed vox but looking down in its paws. The tiger saw that the two tailed vox was nothing but smoke in air. The loser FOX with Spt through the Tigers fingers while the real FOX darted into the house closing the door behind it with a soft click. That's tricky fucks grumbled the tiger. And stocked back into the woods. Zaken Z were playing in the living room of their rocket ship house Windsor Celia Taylor slid into their house in a panic. Why is it to tailed FOX in our house facets Zach? Oh, perfect exclaimed Z we parked outside. The magic would. So I could do some mythic creature watching Z approached the two tailed FOX. Now, tell me are you a key to a Huli Jing? Maybe a Kumio those are all different types of mythical. Fox's the ones I know of well show home, the most magical folks, no forest to see Taylor's the name, but you can call me to tell you. I today who were you running from always running from toy a magic tiger. Oh, it's a right magical, talking Tiga, don't is magical is me mind, but definitely one you'd want to check off your list. I don't know Tigers dangerous and know that toy is just grumpy. Why is he grumpy she's at grumpy Tiga because she's oh covered in bake black stripes. But isn't that what Tigers look like? Well, of course, it is only trouble is her favorite color is orange in at least favorite color is black. Well, I know some basic transmutation magic out there will be just pefect come on a loan. Would you have gone into these tiger full woods with a two tailed FOX you'd never met? Why? No, I wouldn't let z had learned quite a few spells. And to tail was such a clever and charming FOX that before the children knew it. They were following her into that forest. As they were walking through the magical woods Zach stumbled over a fallen unicorn horn. Oh, wow. How have never seen a unicorn horn disclose said Zach forgetting he'd once had a unicorn as a pet. Cool shouted easy taking out her mythic creature book and ticking off a box unicorns can shed their horns when they want to grow a new one or a different one, but the old hone still hold a fair bit a magic from what I said to tail you all to hold onto that case yovany lick stra Bechik Enzi tucks the horn away in her wand case as they traveled deeper into the wood after nearly an hour of wandering through the dimly lit woods. The children came upon. The Tigers layer. Fox. Wow. That's title really wants to eat you. Oh, she annoyed just had a little misunderstanding. But won't you take away those nasty stripes, a his on no all will be forgiven? To jail to either way, I get to check off talking tiger from my louche. Just keep a little quiet. I wanted to be a surprise of. Okay. Sh z took out her wand and with a whisper of spell Tigers stripes disappeared, and even it's white patches turned orange as did its nails. It's knows it's tongue in its is. Hoops. I'm still learning. She's good. I just love it. Are you sure sheer is ship it let's get out and to tail started leading the children away from the Tigers layer night had fallen by the time they got back to their rocket ship house and Wednesay went to pet to tail. Good night. She saw the FOX had grown a third tale to tell you have three tales. So I do seems like every time I perform a very good deed grow another tale. Well, good night three tale children. Thanks again for your help and later talked into their beds, the kids fell asleep to the sound of a distant low rumbling aura. The next morning. The kids vote up to see a giant orange cat rolling around in the dirt in front of their house. Wow. Is easy. Look at the size of that cat that must be some kind of magical creature. I'm not so sure it was really dark glass night. But I think that the tiger. Oh, what she must be really happy to be all Aren JR. And Zak ran out to introduce himself sack Z scooped up one and ran after him. Away for me cry. The great big orange cat by got tricked again by fucks. I don't understand. I thought you wanted to be a big orange cat. Looks like he tricked both of us. I'm trying to roll all of this orange off of me. It's by least favorite color was your most favorite color. No. I always wanted to be a solid black tiger and get rid of these orange stripes. At Dow arrive got all you poor kitty is there anything I can do for you. Give me magic of my own that I can finally trick that fucks I have been saving this old unicorn horn, I special spell, but I could turn you your favorite color, and then we could just play together all day. Yeah. We've never had a pet before said Zach forgetting he'd already had a pet dog pet bat person a pet unicorn and a pet Rocketship house depending on the story. Let me think change colors play with a bunch of kids or get a unicorn horn. And that gives me more magical powers. Yeah. I can be orange for one more day. Well, yeah. But you're the ones who turned to be orange. Remember you own me. Okay. Okay. Fine. Z went to the secret trunk that she hid under her bed and pulled out her prize possession twisty unicorn horn half as tall as her Z climbed up on top of the big orange cat and held the unicorn horn firmly to its forehead with one hand while wielding her wand with great precision, labral Cuttack. She cried given the wand twist and the unicorn horn fused right to the cat's head is fears. The cat started to grow even taller its claws turning into hooves the fluff on its face migrating back to its head to make a long silky, orange main. Now, the great orange cat was great are Angie car. What I'm only in my second year at the observatory him, I guess, my transmutation still these work on the bless. I'd we've got a unicorn pet we've never had a unicorn pet before they had they had had to. It doesn't matter. I've got this big orange horn and with it's magic finally catch that FOX. Okay. Can you just let me down? I please. Off of me. Let me down in the big orange unicorn bucked up. Hi, how get you said Zach diving to catch his big sister. And they fell in a pile of knees and elbows as the orange unicorn galloped back into the forest. Are you a case easy? Yeah. Are you? Okay. Ben better the kids dusted themselves off and walked back into their house to see to tail napping on their arm chair. He may yell. You do know you played a trick on us. So I got my Keller's a little mixed up. You know, FOX's are colorblind. Oh, that makes sense. No. It does hit. You should still know that difference between the words black and orange. Well, your fleet clever said to tail although now she seemed to have four. To give the unicorn hone. We shared did. Now, she's a big Aren Judah corn. So you better watch out. June. Why did made a put that horn on her head? Well, of course for you. Go did in the woods year. Not very nice. Well, noise was that Toyota. Is there a Sola Terry lot of territorial in a few months back? She strode into Moi forest and hold up in more favorite tree. Boy us very nicely leave. But oh, she offered to do was go boldly up. Oh, I think eating someone is worse than tricking someone's easy. That's really was just protecting me home. No, you're having fun at someone else's expense. And you trick us into doing it to how what wouldn't you do this same thing if it was your home on the line? Probably evidently, not where we'll just see then what we have. We have you show friends to the dole. Suddenly the house pitched forward in the back of it started lifting up. Sending Zack in ZZ. Sliding right back out the front door didn't even need to use me. Magic to heck this house much nicer than MIO tree. Thank you. And how the rocket ship house took off into the air. Aren't our parents still in there? Honey, will you turn down the engine trying to read the newspaper? Honey, would you turn down the engine? I'm trying to take a bath. And hearing them to tail turn down the engines setting the rocket ship house to hover one hundred feet in the air flags on tiny. I think we're on our own Zach while then we've gotta find that unicorn maybe she could fly as backup to the house on. No hope it with those long legs in that magic horn. She could be anywhere in that. Magic forest by now she got her horn stock about two trees in. Oh, okay. Okay. Good foolish on his dodgers. Magical as I thought unicorn magic does not work out of malice. I didn't you tell me that malices like my whole thing. Wow. Z how do you know so much about unicorns? It's because they each owned a unicorn their names were her nosy, and sir Jonathan Reinhard fancy who's third. It was episode thirty eight to get me out of growled the orange unicorn, you know, I think we've got enough to a bad start the worst start and continuation. Yes, it's basically all been bad. I'm easy. This is my little brother Zack. I'm stacey. Please. Let me out then Z climbed up upon. It's back again out watch the main and used her last spark of magic to unseat the horn from the tree I'm free now. Where's that FOX? He stole our house. He's in the sky. He tricked you two Diddy climb on my back, and we'll go get our revenge. We don't really want revenge. We just want our house back, but you get your house back in. I'll eat the FOX works for me said Zach scrambling up the orange unicorns back. No one's eating anyone. The unicorn was already galloping straight up into the sky as they got closer to how either Rocketship hosts a giant force field appeared around it for veal sh-. Moore's field said Stacy firing in orange jet of flame at the house, but the unicorns beam couldn't penetrate that deflector shield kids, I'm not used to being a unicorn, and I don't know if I can stop galloping in the air. No, we're headed right towards the force field. I'll hell Zack said taking out his training one. But it's magic wasn't nearly strong enough home when I used up the best of my magic fusing the horn, wait deck hand, me your wand and hold on tight. Zach was writing behind his big sister. He handed over his training one and held onto her waist. I really hope this works Z stuck the base of her one. And the base of Zach swan right next to Stacy's unit. Corran horn. Sorry. We just need to give you a little more magic trick left by and suddenly Botha their wants turned into unicorns. Stacey was barreling straight toward the force field. But then she used her three horns to make one focused beam of bright orange light the force field. Just moments before they were going to gallop into it. And she the shimmery shield shattered into a million pieces raining down harmlessly over the field below kids. We did it. We did all but stacey's still hadn't really learned how to stop galloping. And now all three of her horns were caught in the side of the house okays Zack and Z just go get the FOX and throw them in my mouth, you know, now that I'm a horse. I don't really want to eat the FOX, but I ju- him up real good Stacy had gotten. Stuck right next to a window and Zied pulled it open before carefully. Sliding her brother and herself through are. We really going to feed the FOX to the unicorn I think that's a little too grim for this very tale foxy tale, whatever they snuck out of their bedroom. But there was two tail waiting for them only. Now, she had nine tails, you just couldn't leave well enough alone. Could you lose well enough where you to share ain't now that I've played enough tricks to get all nine of my tales back. There's no way to little kids without magic wands. Can I oh let us FOX in the house? It's a cute little forks Levy squeeze it. I was I was just doing villainous monologue. It just give me one minute pup. Lou had already rolled up his newspaper and was swinging it at the FOX show get outta here, y'all FOX. You Papa loopy nice said, ma'am, Gemma's Qiuping. The nine tailed FOX in a big hug all these extra tales make it so badly. You all a cuddly cute. Fox tricky meet folks. Mom, can we keep her? Yeah. Mom, then you can cuddle her in squeezer and give her smooch is on her face all the time to tail was trying to wiggle free to use her magic, but manage image just kept squeezing her nose linger. Morono of you do kids ever taken care of that before. No, they had so many times. Are you just gonna pass go ahead? Trust me out the window. All be fine. A ho what a score be little girl. Z got the save way is sued as she turned to nine. If you're going to throw her the window mind, aiming towards my mouth wall. If it is enough three horned orange, FOX eating Unicord. You gotta check that. What off your list Z? I think I'm going to have to start a new list, so pup Lou gently steered the house back down to the ground while mammoth JAMA chase to tail all over the house for more cuddles the bucks kept missing her with magic spell and each time. She did another tale disappeared until she was back down to two lovely a two-day faxes no match for a three horned Yuna. Wait, what am I now the kids ones had already turned back to normal? And now the unicorn was a cat again. I'll be with a big orange horn. Okay. Whatever I can work with this. But the real unicorn horn was starting to unstick to. No, no, no, no, no, no. As it fell off Stacy's stripes started coming back and her white firt to inner normal. Non orange cat is quick pretty believe matched. Again. We'll see about fact dole to tail. Said Stacy giving the FOX, wink, hang on do you to actually enjoy this mayor sometimes is just can't change this stripes and some FOX's can't help being tricky to tail spraying off towards the woods. And Stacey the tiger locked along. After her four things are just great years a habit. Can't help themselves said Papa Lou unfolding his newspaper and taking a seat that FOX got me. All dirty. I've gotta go. Take a bath. Good thing. We're not creatures a habit. He got that. Right. Zach. Hey, wanna go try and find some more mythic creatures? Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. Maybe one will be our pets and Zack Ceesay dashed off toward the woods. The end. All right, Stacy and secrecy. I hope you enjoyed your story folks at home, I still need your help. With a quick anonymous survey amid a great bonus episode that I'll send along to you as a reward just go to tiny. You are L dot com slash one world. You can click through it in a minute. An Email me at what if world podcast at g mail dot com. We need a total of two hundred fifty responses to our survey. So the sooner you help us out with it, the sooner I'll stop year Marin about it every week. I'd like to thank Carreno kief. My co creator Craig Martensson for our theme song, my mom, Donna for being as fierce as tiger and his kind as a mammoth Jemma, and all you kids at home who can play tricks and have a laugh, but never lose sight of safety. Unlike a certain to tailed FOX until we meet again, keep wondering.

What If World