20 Burst results for "Dan Savage"

Alexander Pushkin in Opera, Pt. 1

Classical Classroom

06:33 min | 6 months ago

Alexander Pushkin in Opera, Pt. 1

"Hello everyone and welcome to the classical classroom. I'm dish plate and here with me today in the studio is Jonathan Dean. He's the he's the drama for the Seattle Opera and you may remember him from such episode of classical classroom as that one about the Steve Jobs Opera. The Seattle Opera is about to begin performances of Eugene Oregon which is based on a story by Alexander Pushkin and today John is here to talk to me about Pushkin and Russian upper John. Welcome thanks thanks for having me here. Sip before we get started. I have to ask for those listeners. Out there who don't know an me. It was a drama teacher. It's sort of a funny title. Not Every Opera Company has dramaturge but I would describe my job as being charged with making sure that everybody understands what's going on out of the CI- and actually sometimes the people on the other side of the stage to the I was hired at Seattle opera billion years ago to perform the super titles meaning to sit at the booth at every performance. Do make sure the right words over the right characters so when you go to the opera you can like actually read subtitles. But winter actually called Super Title Saban Super Titles. The same things have one is below and the other is up above Right if we did the bottom you wear the conductors head would be people like looking at those shiny bald heads words. Yes we've you know we've been doing super titles in opera in Seattle since the eighty s and pretty much everywhere in the world. That's very normal which gives opera audiences way more access to the drama than they used to have to do some cramming ahead of time and try to memorize what who everybody was going to say to. You know who and then Good Luck. Once the music started and super titles make them much much much. Easier to offer has turned his evolved since that new technology really into something much more theatrical you the listener can play along even if you don't speak Say Russian yeah and and the funny thing is I have that. I started doing that a long time ago as the musician. Getting the right line of if the right person's head by worked on my languages and took over writing the translations. Oh in the nineties. So if it's a talented French German you're usually reading and translation that I wrote. I have never actually learned Russian. We don't do too many Russian opera. So in this case for instance somebody else's has written the translation My job is just to make sure that it all happens. And and goes smoothly. Okay oh but still what a great story Eugenia again. And what a great honor Jerry working with this amazing artistic legacy of this this writer who he is he's one of Russia's greatest writers he belongs to the World Sorry Russia. You CAN'T kill this writers. Work Yeah. I was really excited. That we're going to talk about Pushkin today because back in the olden days when I was doing my Undergrad at Evergreen State College. I studied Russian literature for a while. I just fell in love with it. Because it's like I don't know it's got this really particular flavor this particular character to it that is just like you are curled up in a chair next to a fire with like a goblet of vodka on a winter's nights and having all of the emotions known to humanity all at once. I don't know I don't know how else to describe it. But but like I remember reading Pushkin and it just being this. There's something about his language just made me get what it was like to be Russian and it's very yeah involving it's the rest of the world goes away and it pulls you into so intimate. Yeah yeah so we should say like like who he was and like when he was writing which I think was like the early eighteen hundreds. Yeah remember the beginning part of the nineteenth century the operas you. I've been calling Pushkin. The wellspring of Russian opera every great Russian composer of made operas based on Pushkin Stories with him until much later took them a few more decades to get organized musically. It's funny because he became such a really just pivotal person in the Russian Arts night night even just literature but in the Russian arts but like he started out not so great like his home. Life wasn't great. He had kind of a bad time. He did a lot of Like gambling and drinking and he died young. Yeah that's right. Yeah he like. He was exiled south of Russian. Yeah yeah he kind of lived a lot of the stuff that he was talking about. One thing that I read about him was that he I think he got a lot of the fodder for his stories when So he had been had been exiled by the the Russian government for basically talking smack about them poet writing Commons writing for the stranger Seattle. Yes yes he was a Dan savage or Orlandi Western guy up your exile. So they sent him away like you. Do I guess at that time? And so he's like exile for like six years and then he finally a news. Art comes in like okay. I forgive you. We're still going to censor your work. You can come back. But right after the exile. He was like staying. His family was kind of well to do and they had the state and he went and he stayed on it after his period of exile. And there is. This nurse lived on the estate. Apparently Netanya Netanya. Jagna is the nanny. Oh yeah and so she like. It's just the two of them like everybody else's abandoned the state so he's just like on this estate with this old woman and she must have been a genius storyteller. Everything I don't understand is that he learned from her. How you tell traditional Russian story. Yeah she tells him all these folktales and then he kinda like I don't know yeah so I think she was. Maybe like the secret genius behind his. He he because he does a lot of those Russian folktales verse as these Long Narrative Poems so miserably the language in the poetry's his

Alexander Pushkin Seattle Russian Government Russian Arts Opera Company Pushkin Stories Pushkin Netanya Netanya Writer Russia Jonathan Dean Saban Eugene Oregon Evergreen State College Dan Savage Eugenia Jagna John Jerry
Applying the Camp Site Policy to Relationships

Almost 30 Podcast

02:23 min | 1 year ago

Applying the Camp Site Policy to Relationships

"It's so funny Dan Savage's reading this book last night some thought some thoughts on relationships or something like Oh you want me to read this or not really titles like you could read this whatever in some thoughts and dance average was quoted I was like Oh shit yeah and he it was referencing the camp the campsite policy where you leave someone better and when you left him met them you know so not like blowing up and just damaging people in relationship and then leaving and leaving them so I thought though so interesting I don't I don't do that and I really haven't experienced it that much but I I've I have been witnessed that and that's just such an a cool pulsating stay someone better than when you first met them oh wow yeah or just don't damage them while don't frigging litter everywhere or shit in the tent yeah I mean people don't do that conscious a Lotta Times you know they're playing hours conscious reprogramming I definitely remember one one relationship before I met Justin where I was like oh I really just like he's my didn't you know we do all these like these practices that I restarted classes and sessions gratitude or do all this stuff and like at the end this is gross yeah just felt like it's hard not to want to because we know how good we feel when we do x Y and Z and could not be like hey try this my God let me know how you feel she secretly loved about Justin that he doesn't Wanna do everything I wanted to do he's actually most things he says no I got in a fight about the what comes out of phones of the ems some radiation again. Oh I thought he was all about no he sleeps to this he's a phone he's a phone before bed person okay yeah I knew that but I that he's he sleeps at like right next to him so he he falls asleep to his phone which is you know he's in love to anyone that falls to their phones I don't want the phone next to my head as far as em it's just too shallow for that much longer time yeah you know so but hey that's me life

Justin Dan Savage
"dan savage" Discussed on Dumb, Gay Politics

Dumb, Gay Politics

04:35 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on Dumb, Gay Politics

"Love letter the day, which is buried in this Mr. blog. And I'm on Twitter at fake, Dan savage. Oh, good one. I'm still on Twitter. Thank you. Thanks. Now, it's time for so there's that. All right. So this is the part of the show or Julius defined a so there's that moment that's happening because of or in spite of the hideous political climate in America right now per Usui are overworked and underpaid this week more than ever. And I'm just curious to see what this bitch has pulled out of her ass. So tell us about what is your. So there's that moment for the wing. I'll keep it short. Good. So it was hard to find. It was very hard to find. I in this. Would the shutdown? People have been, you know, not being paid. It's been really depressing. There really hasn't been anything policy wise or anything that's jumped up to us. That's been like, what are what good things are people doing what, you know. Like what what could I possibly feel good about? So I'm reading I'm trying to go and story after story after story. So I finally found something that made me feel irritated, but also inspired. Okay. And especially after day we had a conversation today with a friend of yours who when we talked about healthcare and in the healthcare. She expressed her lament for the fact that when she during Obama, she ended up having to pay more for health care, but then with Trump she ended up having her premiums were leveled off so she didn't have to go up and up and up, and she actually felt pretty good about it. Now, the the reality of healthcare. Currently right now is that some people have it. So. Some people don't a lot of people don't most people don't most people don't most people have lost their health insurance and cannot afford their health insurance and. When you as we know when you don't have health insurance give up and I read this story, and I felt like wow. So. There's an Indian an Indiana school district. There's a superintendent the superintendent is this woman who. Her name is Casey smitherman, which I think is a funny last name names yet, they combined last names. They're right Smith her men, so she was arrested and charged with fraud. Okay. What was she charged with basically she was charged with? And it is a true. It is true. What she did. She saw a kid in in in her school who was who was sick. And then the kid didn't show up at school. And she got worried about the kid, and we'll why wasn't the at school. She went to find out that the kid was sick at home. And he didn't he didn't have health insurance. The family didn't have health insurance. So she took the kid to the hospital and she pretended. It was her son. So that he could have health insurance and get treated. Now, this is a crime, and is it kidnapping. It's okay. It's fraud insurance fraud. It's like when gay people or people get married for health insurance. Yeah. It's fraud. So but this is blatant fraud because she pretended. He was her son. He's not her son. Whatever he doesn't have all the insurance. She gave him her health insurance, blah, blah, blah. So she got caught she got arrested and she got charged. And I just was like, I think it's fucking amazing that she did that I think it's fucking awesome. She's a superintendent of the school system. She went in knowing it was a legal knowing she could get caught she took that kid. She took care of him. She put herself she was she didn't think of her own self. It was a selfless thing to do is kind of done the how can you be superintendent of a school? And then be like, here's my son. Tommy, and they're like, ma'am, I'm looking at your your insurance forms here. I don't remember you ever having a son like they're gonna see that. You don't have a child. I mean, and also I. Find it annoying. Just because it's like, of course, she got in trouble. Like exactly the homeless guy will just dick out put it up against my window. And I was at the Chevron, he's fine. He doesn't get in trouble because he has no home for them to mail a ticket to get in trouble. Just because I'm changing the song. I'm a stupid fucking ipod..

superintendent fraud Twitter Smith Casey smitherman Dan savage Indiana school district Chevron Julius America Usui Obama kidnapping Trump Tommy
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

04:33 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"So not pushing pushing out pushing against that process. But the person who almost stopped us from becoming our son's parents was gay guy. Well. My dad was adopted. My dad was adopted through Catholic charities in Chicago. And so like, I exist because of an option. Like, I'm the person. I am with the last name. I have all the experiences that I exist in my life because of adoption and I lived in Boston. When Boston became the first state to legalize same-sex -chusetts decision. I mean, mate Massachusetts. I was there on the on the on the steps of watching the first couple's emerge, and I was also there when Catholic charities in Boston decided to close as opposed to provide adoption because same sex couples could occasionally or could be considered. Could sue the row the scam? There though is Catholic charities that do adoptions get public monies to facilitate those adoptions, and they didn't want as as a condition of taking public money some of that money from gay people. They didn't want to not be able to discriminate against gay people. Right. And so they self righteously went out of the adoption business and basically harmed children. Yes. Yes. And it's also true to their experts on it's also true in Illinois. I believe that they've just stopped adopting. They didn't like I think. I don't think that they the organization still works. But the, but they religious stone. Do it options religions should not be facilitating public secular adoptions. Hey, sure, I agree that being said it is like it was like the whole idea that we should be alert entrusting children to the Catholic fucking church. Like, hey, Dan, this guy agrees with you. Who's the, you know here these children I remember once during the height of the marriage equality debate. Some Catholic bishops saying the adoption by gay couples is child abuse entire reaction was perhaps we should defer to the experts, right? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's I I can have all those feelings and be like shouldn't be in that game to begin with like what? Like shitty organization have around kids like all this stuff. And then there's the part of me. That's like I could never adopt through the agency that I am a product of like that is also gnarly so. Almost Furet option. But. It's about people also are trying to get in my way. And Dan the thing about the two the two of us unite. We will not be stopped. We're going to have great lives. I always think of Tammy Baldwin strip speech ten fifteen years ago that if you want to live in a world where you can put your partners picture on your desk at work, put your partners picture on your desk at work, and you live in that world that we have to move into the world and demand space and live our lives and live our lives in our truths. And that then creates the space for us to live our lives and people can behind us to live their lives and their truths. And that's what changes the Buchan world. Yeah. Okay. Well, then we'll just keep on in the direction that we're moving changing the world. We'll keep kicking us. And you know, I get a lot of anger emails right now. You said it gets better like Trump and everything's awful. Right. There are dividends when things are tough. After if you get in the fight fight the fight. And then there's going to be a a real payoff in the end marriage equality was an outgrowth of the HIV aids epidemic. Reaction to it that the real drive in the real push to legalize same sex marriage that the need for it was made crystal clear by how vulnerable people were when they weren't the legal next of kin of their partners, right people. They've lived with for ten fifteen twenty years and homophobic, family members blowing into hospital rooms and throwing people out and denying people now allowing the husband and everything but eagle sense to come to the funeral. Gene, houses snatching houses apartments. Yeah, valuable it was it was people were just so vulnerable. And so in way, you know, you look at all these couples who can marry now and marriages, whatever to people say that it is it doesn't have to be hetero normative or homo normative. It doesn't have to be. You know, people are always like God. It's you know, it's assimilation. Like, no, it's not we have a simulated marriage marriage is not a similar guys. But I forgot what was saying the cold medicine took over..

Buchan world Boston Dan Catholic fucking church Chicago Tammy Baldwin HIV Massachusetts Illinois Gene Trump ten fifteen twenty years ten fifteen years
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:40 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"She's a wonderful politically savvy fabulous tell it like it has blunt dyke. But very classy in from a wealthy family. And she was just flabbergasted that we would want to do this. Now, we weren't hurt by like it was just this exchange. And it wasn't like we were wounded, you know, why would you want to do this? And we would tell her right which one to go, you're crazy, and we'd go. Well, that's what we're gonna do. It wasn't like we were sad or burst into tears when Barbara Davis grief or give a shit. We loved it when Barbara gave a shit, but it was a different time. And I have terrible memories about you know, some things that went on. There's this right wing radio talk show hosts to did a show about how there's this case where this woman had a child with another woman, and then converted became a fundamental Christian and absconded to South America with the kid and the other mothers never seen the kid ever again. And it was this conspiracy. You know, and other people have gone to jail for the crime. Right. And this guy got on the radio and said that there should be an underground railroad kidnapping, the children who've been adopted by gays and lesbians and rescuing them from our families. And they said our names, and we got emails with pictures of our house, and we had to go to our then seven year old son and be like so there if somebody comes to the door of somebody comes to your school and tells you that we're hurt and they're there to pick you up or this this this this this. And to explain that to him. And then one time when he was this is N P fucking are. I believe we're listening to the radio, and there's somebody being interviewed against gay, adoption and DJ's sitting there and this person says on the radio that gay men. Adopt children because we want to adopt boys because we want to rape them and our eyes lock Meinen deejays. And I was just like we're never like, what do you say? At that moment. Like. We're we haven't raped you yet. And we're never going to rape. You know what I mean? Like at that moment. What do you say to your kid who just heard somebody? This Thawra Tatum voice on the radio like saying that what motivates gay men to adopt. Little boys is a desire to fuck them. And your son is looking at you like with fear in his eyes. Like what what like that person's Aligarh straight, people straight dads. My father was a straight guy. Didn't fuck my sister. Like, it's not what parents do what their children, and that's not what we're about. And to to go through those things with just such a such a nightmare. And to have the debate the entire time be how do kids with gay parents? They wanted the marriage debate to be kids deserve a mother and a father, which you don't hear from the kids deserve a mother and father crowd anymore about this child separation policy at the border silence from these motherfucking Brian Brown pieces of shit. But it was all about how kids with gay parents turn out. And so there was just this pressure on our son not to step on any like typical adolescent landmines for fear of it ending up on Fox News. Right. Yeah. I mean, this is. I think a lot of that is very specific to you. And when this happened, I also I bet there's you know, some listener who is raising a kid right now who is dealing with some different version of what you're talking about. And. First of all, I'm so sorry that you went through that just be a person. That's looking at your is. Well, it's not fair, and it sucks, and I'm sorry. We go through a course. But like circling all the way back to like, some people are shitty, we were adopting, and I did a piece for NPR for for this American life about the adoption process and somebody figured out where our.

rape Barbara Davis South America Thawra Tatum kidnapping Fox News DJ NPR Aligarh Brian Brown Meinen seven year
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:44 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"And but it's but it sometimes. Through. Sure. Yeah. Data points in. There are trends. It is broadly true that most people who object to their partner watching pornography are women. I feel like maybe for that reason because gave people some different information about like. I mean, I know you're actually doing this. This might be your job is almost ticket people different permission. But I think about something like. Like if that wasn't involved in the negotiation. And of course, we can't take sex out of culture. But I just mean if it's two people deciding whether or not she wants to have about sex, and she just gets to make that decision based on sensation. And not on like what it means. I feel like that would be an amazing world. And I really wish we could get studies on that with actual study that would needs to be said to someone who's curious about but sexes. It's a spectrum. Like every other fucking has does you don't have to the first time you enjoy some sort of anal pleasures to mutilation. It can't be about some giant dick slamming in and out of your is it has to be about other forms of play or toys, and you should tip toe. The fuck up to it, and you know, you wanna create a positive association, and so having some anal simulation. Particularly if you are a prostate gland Lewis person having some anal stimulation that you. You know that that's concurrent with pledging yourself in another way by which you climax is actually very helpful for folks. But you know, that's not going to be taught. But we teaching a lot of people that you know, anal should come standard that anal is the new oral. And then you have people attempting it, and they try to go for what they've seen it. It's a real problem. We're not gonna have a sex Ed class that like says, you can't just do the anal. You saw and pouring the first time you try anal time. You do anal maybe get a little bit plug. Maybe get a little vibrator Rabi each other's holes and masturbate together. Like, they're not gonna tell you that. Yeah. Every not. But it is. But then what about like the cool hip people who never go beyond their sex, Ed class. Like, that's what scares me. It's like it's not that. I think like some people will be left behind, but it's more. So just like, oh my God. It's such a large percentage of people being left behind. It. Just makes me it makes me sad. Okay. You were about to ask me a question I interrupted, and we went up on this enormous tangent. So do you even remember what that was? I do remember what I was going to ask you is about your experience parenting at the time in our culture when you adopted your son. I you would know the exact year, and I don't know if you're comfortable sharing it, but it's ninety eight. Okay. So a very unusual thing at that time for gay male couple of time, particularly to do an open, adoption, which is where the mother picks the family, and the child is placed with we were there are others out there who had adopted certainly gay men who were parents before. Tearing I became parents, but to adopt as a couple at that time was really rare. And it was a little high fire. I don't talk. I haven't written a lot about it. My son's almost twenty one. There were moments that were just very very odd. And you know, when we were adopting the most grief, we got was from queer people. You know, we had older game lesbian friends who are like what the fuck are you doing? This is the trap that. We can we were forced to have children or felt compelled to have children and family or want to get married. And now, this is what you wanna do like cause for you know, there's this older, lesbian friend Barbara Bailey who just passed away recently. He owned a bookstore in Seattle who Terry worked at the bookstore..

partner Seattle Barbara Bailey Ed Lewis Terry
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

02:51 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"There's also not the big reveal often boys are masturbating for years before they had Jackie late for the first time and some boys, particularly pre you know, ubiquitous pornography. The first time they evacuated they didn't expect it. And they didn't know what that was. And they were a little thrown by it, sometimes boys. Ben, you know, when I was teenager thought they were dying. Yes. When the first Jackie fast lake there were destroying themselves in pleasure in themselves for years before they climaxed. First time. But if you're a woman, and you don't start masturbating until you're eighteen or nineteen or twenty or twenty one it may take years of pleasure in yourself before you find the groove that makes you come the first time. Absolutely. I mean, well, and then you also add to that. I mean, everything you said is totally right. And I think also. Were taught. And I don't know. I have no idea if this is any different, but I will speak about what was taught to me. And when he's still hear people say like in a stand up comedy sense. I hear people talk about sex, and I'm like, oh my God. Like. We're still talking we st-. I still hear people talk about women. Not watching porn porn is like a thing that that like your boyfriend is sneaking I still think that most porn doesn't ever show anything that actually makes sense with vagina. There's like a lot of like, very long nails. Also with nice what's nice about gay porn link allows me to relax a little bit. And enjoy it is that if the people that are performing like both have erections, I can as a viewer be like other enjoying themselves. And it helps me to feel like it's okay for me to watch this because I hate, you know, like, I'm reason this world, I know that not misogyny Israel. I I know that like women can be in a bad situation. There's nothing physically on their body. That's like telling me that this is fun for them. I'm hearing out of their mouths with they're saying or like, maybe they're squirting. But it's in a way, that's like what what is actually happening to her. Her. Regularly. Yeah. Like in. So I think there's it's like not just that. It's like we're not touching her own bodies. We're taught that eighty percent of people with a chance can't organism. And then there's really nothing to look at. That's the equivalent. I love that. You say gay porn because that that really is also what people with China's have to watch. Like, it kind of is everybody has to watch gay porn help them. And you ask someone went to a dick is a big clip. Yeah. What he's doing with his cloud, his big giant cloud. But I mean, it's it's like wild to me that I will tell you the things that people say on stage are such a good indication of a premise is such a good indication of what we accept as a culture because the premises always like given that we all think this, and you know, like that I still live in a world where people I know think that like, but sex is something that like women just hate endure agreeing to you know, like that it's like a an that's not true..

Jackie fast lake Jackie Ben China Israel eighty percent
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

04:13 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"That expires February fifteenth. So order now. Okay. Can I change the subject to ask you a question that I just wanna make sure I get in today? The clitoris 'cause I answered that one. If there's one thing, I know. It is where the clitorises if there's two things were reading like home when you're that's right. That's right. That's right. That's how didn't read the calmer. I put it in the wrong place. Otherwise, confused. No. I mean, I say this on stage. But this is one hundred percent true. Like, I didn't know people could have orgasms that we had vaginas did not know people with China's could have orgasms until I gave someone else with a vagina in orgasm. Like, we were working towards something. I guess like the body knows what the body's doing, but it was scratch thing. Oh, no way. Feels good. I guess. Also at the time. I mean, like, maybe it's different. Now, I'm not totally sure. But another thing that was happening is like when I when I was a teen. And I was reading like seventeen magazine Cosmo things like that. They're always these percentages in there that were the percentage of women that can have orgasms. It was a thing. We used to talk about that. We don't talk about very much anymore, and it's very good. Because what are they talking about? First of all like those women like what situation were they in do that. Can they identify an orgasm? Like, I mean, it was it was nobody had good information. And so what we did was we talked about it as if it was built into those people's bodies. And so I grew up reading those, and it was like it would be like eighty percent of women can't have orgasms. And so I was was from Baginda intercourse alone with some Otis dolt. Exactly. Yes. At a woman who had been socialized to Bush's entitled to sexual pleasure and had been denied any information about us. So there I go I'm having sex with somebody with China. I'm like, wow, you're part of the twenty percents. But yeah, I didn't I didn't know I didn't think it would be possible for me. Like what we've already we've already beat the odds. It's there's two of us. Here can't be both of us. And then it was and that was a that was a great twenty realization twenty when this happened when I was with someone else. Yes. I might have been even twenty one or twenty two could cod. Yeah. Because it was a couple years years. Dan. Do you hear the word? I said it was a couple years of being with my first girlfriend. Can I like to quick download about guys? Can we actually please talk about guys again? Good for at least two minutes. And I just wanna guys. This comes up in my job a lot where I'm like adjudicating disputes between straight people and talking to women straight women guys when they arrive at partnered sucks, whether they're gay or straight are experts on their Dicks. They know exactly what it takes to come. They know whatever they need to have in the room is going to be in the room whenever they knew that they know their orgasmic plateaus, they know the point of guys make inevitabilities they've been edging themselves for six years. They know women all too often arrive at partnered sex never having masturbated never having had an orgasm not experts on their own junk. And they look out usually a teenage boy, and they go, okay. Make me come. I don't know how to make me come us. Some teenage boy, probably maybe also a virgin, you should know how to make. Of course, he doesn't know how to make me come. He knows how to make himself. Come. And he's going to masturbate inside you. That's how he's gonna make himself. Come. You have to know how to masturbate on top of him. If you're having. That kind of sex or message under him during penetrative intercourse. That's how women come off and telling young straight couples who are having issues around this to watch some gay porn, just like five minutes. Get on porn hub, watch gay guys fucking each other look at the guy getting fucked. What's he doing? He's playing with his own dick you wanna come during penetrative sex play with your clique. That's how you'll come during penetrative sex. You're get him to play with your Clint or use a vibrator. Yes. But you know, so often women just arrive. At partnered sacks the cultures and encourage them to masturbate slight shaming..

China Cosmo Baginda Bush Otis Dan one hundred percent eighty percent five minutes two minutes six years
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:24 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"But he also made me read books. I can't remember the name of the author the psychologist called society and the healthy homosexual, and it was the antidote to everything ever wanted to know about sex, but we're afraid to ask which was this kind of pop sex book science pop sex awful book about sacks that had these terrible chapters about what gay people are in our like and damaged. They are. And he made me read citing the healthy homosexual to understand who I was as a condition of continuing to get to bounce up outta as dick. And that was how the we have a responsibility. When people come out. To educate them because they arrive ignorant, and and you know, I think less so now though because there's access that, you know, clear could going up today if they're so motivated us to get online and not just look for porn or not just look, you know, to create their own YouTube channel and do makeup tips, but to actually read and learn this, it's all instantly available in a way that it wasn't when we were younger typically when I was younger, but we don't raise our kids, right? We're also. Like just missing a generation of people. Yeah. Which is fucking sad and bizarre that that that Israel. But, but I in some ways, you know, after the new drugs after the cocktail came along Lazarus syndrome, which was a happy syndrome not required immunodeficiency syndrome that was people rising from the dead. Which was what happened when the drugs came in ninety six the cocktail. There was this desire not just among younger generations. We're an old enough. What the hell is going on who wouldn't know. Then then couldn't forget they just never knew there's a desire on the part. I think a lot of us who lived at to like have to think about it for five minutes to to to return to some semblance of of normality and rebuild our psyches. I find myself increasingly so vulnerable to anything that sort of touches on what nine hundred ninety eight or nine hundred ninety one was like and people think the worst of it was like eighty four. Eighty five the worst. The death toll is rising every year until ninety six like I lost a whole bunch of people early. But I was still losing people and at a greater clip into the nineties in tonight, you know, ninety six and just sometimes something will come along like, and I will just be shattered by thrown back into the moment in a way that. In two thousand I just wasn't thinking about it anymore or or just not allowing myself to think about it and moving pass it not wanting to talk about it or think about it. Now, there's this remembering now, there's this. Accounting that has to be done. Sure. I never heard anybody say that that makes sense. That makes sense. I'm like, we we are not asking the question. And I think that it fair also to say we didn't we needed a break from providing the information. That's that's also that makes sense to me ACTA, Philip part. Not because everybody backed up died, but because everybody act up was done. Yeah. Everybody hadn't died posited. Nag like was done and needed to think about do something else..

immunodeficiency YouTube Philip Israel five minutes
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

02:50 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"Services for people living events at the time. I hate it straight people. I was furiously angry. And I you know, I was one of those you know, I had it in my head. When I first came to accept myself from being gay that that meant I had to get away with my family. I had to get away from straight people. I had to like find a place, whereas just with other queers, I understand share that impulse. But then my experience. Maybe it's because I love and I was twenty six years old, and suddenly I had all these straight people pouring their fears and securities issues. Yeah. I ended up feeling sorry for straight guys, which actually didn't think was possible. If the Grinch, my heart grew three sizes one day and busted out of the x Ray, I feel for straight guys. I think straight guys are. Well, first of all I want to say here's one option for why we have a different opinion on this. It's almost as if to queer people even to white queer, people can have difference can have a different or Pinon. That's one thing. Second thing. I just want to say is I don't even remote. I was just going to say about that. So to white queer Kappler. Yeah. People. It's almost like we still have who knows? But. I'm thirty seven and. Dan. I'm sure you like, I'm sure you believe this. And this is not something that's shocking to you. But like when I think about younger generations of gay folks that are gonna. Like completely miss any evidence of the HIV and aids crisis. I will say like I actually kind of almost did like at thirty seven. I mean, I got Ryan white. I'm my TV screen. I was too young DRO mold or even that. I like didn't. I mean, I he was on the real world and. He's almost like like like I would have been too young. Like, I didn't I didn't watch MTV. So he was really important to a lot of people. I totally missed him at the time. I missed what was happening nationally like it was not something I was at all aware of. And then it is weird to me to be the age. I am now I'm like fully an adult and still feel like. I just like really that. It doesn't have this lasting presence for younger generations like that. Good people in. Oh, you want. You wanna play to end. I don't mean that. I mean words remember that in happens. Yeah. People do need to remember to happen. But we don't raise our children, and our history isn't taught in schools and eternally grateful to my very first boyfriend who I think I was seventeen he was twenty eight and that was also really common then because guys my worn out. And so I only could date somebody who was in appropriately age doughty. But the you know, he wanted to fuck me..

Ray Ryan white Kappler HIV MTV Dan twenty six years one day
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:50 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"You're a good one. And if you're only like wary about straight people, you're going to deprive yourself as some great relationships with great straight people. And if you let your guard down whenever you're just in a room full of queer people you are going to be taken advantage of or harmed by shitty queer people and they're out there. Some people think I'm one of them like I say, this sometimes the people get angry is to me about it. And the people who've been telling me, I'm should he quit person. Forever. Well, I mean. I I'm wondering if part of why we might have a different experience of this. Because I think like everything you said, it makes total logical sense to me and is also not my experience. And that's because if I think about the people who've harmed me the most and if I'm really real, it's it's a straight, man. Like, I also have a lot of straight men in my life who've been very positive people stood us out that every single straight man has harmed me, it is that almost every person who's harmed me is a straight, man. So when I think about and then also just about clearness in this culture that's about being a woman in this race. So that's what it was say. I think maybe the difference in what I'm talking about my be misogyny. And then I would also add to that that like, you know, you I don't know how you are. But you're like a I mean, you're like you've like some muscles in your also pre told dues. Okay. So like you're out in the world. I will say I'm scared in the world. I feel scared and one thing that me. Yes. Sure. I feel scared in the world. Because you know, at some point you're still that person with the secrets to walking around trying to pass is still afraid of how you're being perceived and still afraid of violence. Okay. Is still you know mind Mojo's bins from kind of shitty rural area or should he small town? And we go there, and I'm just a nervous wreck the whole time because I feel committed gay bash to death. I mean, I feel that way a lot. And I think one thing that I have done in order to cope because like also I'm never going to be rhyming. I'll say I don't know if I should say never I haven't I have yet to be in a relationship with a dude or anybody who can like ever project physical protection. And that's another thing. Like, so I walked through the world, not just as a woman. But when I'm with somebody. It's usually somebody else who's small, and you know, it's usually like like who's even like the boyfriend the beats the beats somebody up on my behalf. I I haven't had that person since I was. You know? And I have that person inherited because he's fearless. And. And big and muscular now, he's a skinny little twinkling. I met him. But he's scary now. Yeah. So yeah, I totally can appreciate that difference. So I wonder if it's like a need actually like a need to view like queer folks as family because otherwise literally like, otherwise who has my back. I mean, truly, and I mean that I really I really I really don't forget that. I'm fifty four years old. Don't forget that in nineteen eighty two or three all my friends started to die. I came out when I was a teen. Like, I'm a bit of a rarity or auditing for gay men my age, and that I came out of high school. It was typical then for gay people to come out in college. If they came out in college at all. To help people understand what it was like, then I frequently mentioned that I was the only out gay guy in my theater department at the university of Illinois Cranford sign the acting program for a couple years. Everybody else was gay at turned out. But they didn't come out till after the graduated. So I was a bit of an anomaly, and I didn't feel safe and what went down what was done to game in on the way we retreated during the HIV aids epidemic and the way we had to come together and with came together, not just with each other. But also with lesbians buzzed means, we're heroes of the movement enact up in providing.

HIV fifty four years university of Illinois
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

04:24 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"Like, the bullies. You know, the straight that I hated and I got away from the couldn't break, my heart. Okay. Right. They could punch me. They could scare me. The insult me and hurt me that way, call me. And once I was over that. And lead calling me if I didn't hurt because it's what I want my boyfriend to call me while he fucks me. Who can hurt me now? And so I see this a lot like the bitter ex gays. Remember, the ex gays there's still like rolling around out there when you sit down and talk with the next game. He's usually really bitter about the gap between their expectations of how they would be received. When they came out how they would be welcomed how they would be cared for by other queer people, and what they met when they came out which was people who weren't very nice, which was queer people who are assholes. Sure. And I think where people are assholes at a slightly greater rate than straight. People are assholes. Dave tell me more about that. Well, I mean, I'll I'll tell you like my experiences that. I love straight, folks. I have a lot of friends that are straight. I've two straight siblings. I also work in comedy. It turns out, I know straight people, especially straight men. There are only a few of them that do stand up comedy. I've heard like they're a minority. But there around affirmative action. Let's so someone needs to get one of them is show. Samia light wouldn't that be cool, and it's named after them. But yeah, I definitely have those folks around me in there in my life. And and like after a while, it's it's obviously a choice. It's like I'm choosing to maintain friendships and men care about these people. But like, I also think that I feel a different connection as people my closest firm, we're or queer pupil and that affinity reassured experience. Yeah. Is that to me is familial? But this could just be like Emory super talion like it's my whole thing. Whatever like, what is that feeling to you? We that. There's there's something that we share that. Could if we are in other ways in pot Akot or compatible compatible or combat -able. Be the Genesis or the touchstone for like, a great connection, a great friendship. Like, we understand each other's sort of resented stone pain in a way that others don't in the straight people can't quite appreciate and that can create a real bond league in the coming out. Experience is unique to us, and it is our hero's journey, and you get four queer people together who've never met in eventually people start talking about when they came out and what that was like telling their parents. And and it's just something we all share, whether we're, you know, conservative Republican gay guy, and I have no respect for any of them. I'm I have a limitation there. But yes, or you know, some other kind of queer person who's not an idiot. That still is a shared sort of touched on experience. When I say like I get in trouble for this. You're gonna make me say things I got in trouble for it. But if they're in print out there, I've said this insurance, we're this is good. I I welcome this. We point out that we commit suicide at higher rates us drought. Abused drugs. I think if there's a difference when you send abuse, but we abused drugs at higher as if you sack sometimes at high rates, we've all known have gay friends that we've watched punish themselves with sex harm themselves with sex. And we smoke at higher rates were more self destructive because of the homophobe because of the transfer because of the BI phobia NB, the ace phobe, the pan, phobia, whatever we're more that that damages us. But that also isn't just doesn't just go inward that there are people who externalize their internalized, homophobia, externalize their self hatred and harm other queer people, and it's not just the serial killers. There are people who are just toxic shitty. Queers who are the worst to other queer people because what they hate about themselves. They hit about you. They hate their themselves for being queered, the you for being clear, and they're going to lash out even some of them are all wrapped in pride flags and pride jewelry and saying all the right things, but they're fucking toxic. And if you don't want on your guard for those folks, if you have this starry eyed pollyanna attitude about like, oh, you're queer..

Dave Samia
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:02 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"Or if this is one of my fellow queer people still coming at me. And that is so telling that that it's about rage and people want to rage at you. And how I keep my spirits up. Is you don't have to show up to get punched like when Breitbart or Fox News when I put my foot in or say something that pisses them off bullshit in the bible in front of high schools kids. I turn off my phone. I don't look at my Email that week. And then maybe I look back a week later, but I don't show up to get killed. And I have so many people I have a friend right now who's going through it is getting dragged and she's just sitting there with her phone around. And just like you take the phone when you put it down and say, let's go to the movies. You don't have to sit there and take this in you don't have to show up for your execution. Yeah. Twitter, Facebook or tumbler or anywhere else. That's voluntary. When you show up for your execution. Walk the fuck away. Go to a movie say sorry, if you think you need to say sorry read a little bit of it. Then once you said sorry and people keep pummelling you and coming at you. They're not coming out you for an apology. They're coming at you for blood, and they want to hurt somebody don't show up. Don't be the meat. I think it's I think that's a good answer. Because like I said, I mean, I'm not I am advocating that we always try to do better. I think that's what you advocate of clears. Yeah. The golden rule. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. But there is that middle ground, and I just see you as somebody who's had to deal with that. And when I I mean, it's a difficult line to walk because you can't just dismiss anybody who's angry at you. Because sometimes people are angry for legitimate reasons. And so you have to like be nimble enough to dip into the pile of anger, and like pluck out what you needed to know. And then when you figure out what you need is. No, you don't have to keep dipping into that pile of anger about that particular thing anymore. Yeah. I think this is I think this really is important too. The core family because as we grow, and we're type things like I hate when people say the clear family, do you because we're not family, gay and lesbian. I think that's I think that's damaging. Okay. Tell me it me two young clears. I think that's damaging because it causes a lot of young people to enter the gay community or the queer community with their guards down like oh now, I'm finally surrounded by people. I'm safe family. It's like, yeah. No, you're not. And maybe this is a lesson. I learned in a scalding way. Because when I like realizing I was gay the papers in Chicago were covered with John Wayne, Casey and all these dead gay boys, my age or a little bit older than me. And then when I was like in my twenties early twenties still living in Wisconsin. Jeffrey Dahmer eight my friend, Tony. And so I just never had the like, I'm safe here. Like, I'm in a gay bars actual serial killers. Look first of all, Dan. I just want to say, I think those are I think that it's an atypical..

Breitbart Casey Fox News Jeffrey Dahmer Wisconsin Twitter Facebook Dan John Wayne Chicago Tony
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

02:27 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"And I'm like, yeah. It's a real fucking thing. One percent of the population. There's a spectrum of sexuality is gray sexuality, like I know it now, but I still have people who are just livid because I didn't know it right away. You know? And that's actually exactly what I was leading into. Because I know I I know that this is something that you've sort of publicly talked about, and I think a lot of our listeners could a lot of my listeners could really benefit from hearing. Because I first of all I know there are people who are raced all the time in our community and who need to speak up and who need to correct me or anyone. And I know there are times I need to do that to other people. That's that's chill. I think one thing that exists is people who are paralyzed by making a mistake. Like, we do patrol ourselves as a community to an extent where I get a lot of folks that ask me like what do I do if I use the wrong pronoun for somebody? And I'm like, I think intention does matter. I think adjust. I think like catch up I think do better next time. But you're somebody who has had to do this pretty publicly. So I'm wondering like what if anything you want to talk about about like, I don't wanna I don't wanna get too much into it because I don't like well more. So just like, how do you keep your spirit intact as you have to publicly adjust because I feel like that's something queer people are having to do right now. It's like we're having to look at our community and do better. And so like how have you? I've got your shit together from both sides. Like Breitbart has come from. Me Fox News is come for me. I've had days where it's just like, you know, nothing but death threats and nothing but furious angry people right from the right? Breitbart did a week on me. Right. We're like every day on their front page like three or four articles. But what an ASA lamb, and what that does to your social media, and your voice, mail, inbox and your Email. Inbox is insane scary, Gary, and I've also gotten it from the left and often the clear left. Sometimes there's this anger that attached to me because there's this fear that my listeners and readers are straight people. And that makes me more dangerous. 'cause if I get it wrong, I'm screwing up straight people who have the power to really harm us. And so I'm held accountable in ways that are different sometimes because my audience is a straight audience, and I've always been writing to straight people mostly about straight sex. And so I get that I have to like beheld slightly higher standard because of that awesome responsibility. But like I'll get it from the right again it from the left, and then it'll come down, and then I'll get like angry stuff, and I literally have to click through to somebody's main page to figure out if. This is a right winger. This is one of the Breitbart Astles still coming up me..

Breitbart Gary One percent
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:29 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"And I want to join the swinger I wanna find the swingers, and I can't find them and you couldn't just Google it. There are these like psalms dot publications, which are probably gonna come back as they drive Saxon. Sex workers off the internet because of disaster. Oh, these publications were were these lists of PO boxes for the swingers clubs in all over the country. And I would like print the PO box that I would refer people. But now, there's Google, you know, butt plugs. Have a Wikipedia don't mean me to tell you what about plug is anymore. So all the questions now are I to this? They did that who's the asshole news in the wrong, but a Solomon-like carving babies in half after week after week and much tougher gig now than it was thirty years ago. Well, that's pretty interesting. I wonder though, I mean, yes, you can you can Google all of this things. And then you're gonna get a lot of porn, and then you can hopefully like if you're savvy at being on the internet, eventually get to information like how do you always remember to put, you know, if you're look up but plug fist fucking water sports, just what fist fucking Wiki. And the first thing that comes up is actually, very helpful and informative suggestion is extremely helpful solve. I just wanna say so glad I asked that question. I guess there. It is listeners. Okay. Look that thing with a fortune cookies when you add in that at the just whatever you're going to search online just had Wicky not everything on Wiki is one hundred percent accuracy. But but for the most part, there's some good information there, I have Wikipedia had nothing to do with it. There's some shit on there. I'm like where did that come true? And what am I supposed to do about? That can't go in there and ended up myself because I don't know how to now. I mean, you could ask your listeners, and it would get fixed up real quick. That's the thing. That's a good thing to ask other people to do for you go on Wicky, please. And make me thirty four. Yeah. Okay. For a long time. One of my top goals was to be. I don't know why I thought this would be really great. But like as a famous alum from high school and college that I went to but just the only qualification be lesbian like is. It would because there was like every school has that little box is like person in like what they did. And I just wanted to say as general. Yes, exactly. And I just wanted to see lesbian now. I think it says like stand up comic that sorta like what a pain, but I for a while. It was. Because I it because I ever figuring it out. So you're twenty six you got this big job and jumping back to the clitoris thing link. I've always said that the calms is much an education for me as it is for my readers, you appear to be on mission. When you're right on advice column looks like you have all the answers because you don't print questions. You don't have answers for or you got a question. You don't know the answer you find the answer, then you print it as if you knew it all along, but you get things wrong, and then people yell at you. And then you read some more and reassess, and yeah, I know so much about pussy now. I'm like that autistic savant who's never been to Tokyo, but can draw you a map of the subway system. Like, I know all the stops. I know right where you get off. But I've never been well. Actually that is okay, if many many places to branch off of their one is one thing, I like that happens on your podcast is that you have a little section at the end where people can it like is actually a great way of covering number one of like getting some listener voices in there, which you know, it's always great to including them or to like covering your ass because you don't have to be the only person responsible for making.

Google Wicky Tokyo one hundred percent thirty years
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:21 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"I had a boyfriend we'd been living in west Berlin. That's how long ago it was. And we came back to Wisconsin. So he could get his master's degree. And then we're going back to Berlin. And then he took a job for a on the road for a year in the states. And I was like, well, I'm gonna go help them start a newspaper, and then we'll. Like meet up vacations, and then we'll go back to Berlin. And then moved to Seattle where I'd never been and never wanted to be. And we broke up my ex-boyfriend. And I I was maroon there and in like four months my joke column suddenly became an actual advice column because real questions started to pour in because it turned out that first-rate person being treated with contempt was an exciting new adventure as opposed to like the same old shit, and they really responded to it. And suddenly at age twenty six I had to figure out where the clitoris was and write about it with some thority one of the early mistake, the Khazar in the calm before Google if I wanted to know a fact I had to go to a thing called a library and opened up in called a book and the first time I read about the clitoris, I put it in the wrong place. So where where did you put him on the soft? Palate turns out, that's where mine is projected an assume that other everyone's was I put it inside outside and above. I just thought it was in there somewhere like a joy buzzer that being said like that makes perfect sense. That really makes perfect sense that that that's what you would think. I I don't think that you like, let's say you're straight guy, and it's nineteen Ninety-one. Like still kind of think, that's what your opinion is going to be really think a lot of guys now. Yeah. And then also now. No sex such said, and then you're just like, by the way. Also, like, your pleasure, really matters. That's that's we're telling you that. Because like these condoms are like, you know, like we were trying to make them so thin because it's just like really important that you can't even feel them at all. And and also like good luck. I hope it goes like, I just think it's going to great. You can't make a baby if he didn't enjoy himself if he didn't climax there's no baby and all about as a baby. And if you have sex reproductive biology, you can't avoid talking about the male or goes them, but you can sidestep female pleasure entire again. And all of the clitoris, which just exists to provide pleasure doesn't even have to come up. I'm sure it doesn't come up in Boston. You very often. I mean, we'll ultra boy's head clitorises. They would be talking about them at Boston you. I mean, I don't know. I feel like. Yeah. Do I don't know. Well, you would know better than I would. But I mean, how often do we how often when people are even writing in about sex is their question about pleasure. Like, even percentage wise. They're like I feel like I listened to your eyes. Listen to the savage love cast. It's like much more off. Yes. Like, it's like roommates that's enough and won't be floor writing in about like a lot of it's really changed in nearly thirty years. I've been doing this. I used to get a lot of call them definitions and referrals. People would hear the word fisting and not know anything about it. And then they write me like what is this fisting thing or what is water sports 'cause there was no Google to consult. And if you didn't have a gay friend who had answered any question, you they would write me, and I would say it's this, and here's how you do it. And here's the here the risks in here. The here's why you shouldn't panic about it and referrals where people would say, you know, here in Dallas..

Berlin Google Boston Wisconsin Seattle Dallas thirty years four months
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

03:56 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"Yeah. I feel like actually unite white here. I feel like we told me it was sloop. Yeah. Chicago Milwaukee feel like we may have. Had slightly different experiences on that only. Because of the ages that we were when we realized that we require because I think you were like you said you're like a younger like a thirteen fourteen year old person realizing this, and I was like nineteen. So by the time, you're nineteen you're fully like you have. I was like who is around like who tonight fought? Like, literally just like is anyone is there anyone, and and it was just I couldn't find it. Like, I really couldn't. I mean, I was going to school up Austin college. And at the time it was prohibited. In the you couldn't be gay on this for for people who may not know this. It's a Catholic university Catholic university. I spoke there once they invited me to speak their whites fifteen years ago. The height of the marriage equality to business. Speaking. And they give me a talking to before. I went on the things they did not want me to say. And you know, what that that's like waving red flag in front of a bowl. So I immediately went up there and said here all the things I'm not supposed to talk about is talking about those. I get that out of the way. Right. It was fun place to talk. I got a t shirt still have it. Yeah. I mean, I think that that it's also a school that like, I don't just think. Well, I meet a lot of great friends there. There were a lot of ways it, positively impacted my life. It is also a school that like to this day. I I believe this is still true. It was the last time I checked you could not you can't birth control on campus, meaning even condoms, and I mean, it's also school where I think it's it's some very high percentage seventy five eighty percent of students live on campus. It's one of those schools where everybody lives on campus. So everybody lives on campus. I'm everybody has anal. Everybody has. Yeah. Well, I mean, sometimes you still God's hood. Sometimes you still could benefit from a condom. But wouldn't trying to avoid conception. Right. Yeah. I mean, it wasn't just that the pill. Was it kind of blew my mind that it's like you couldn't even you couldn't even get condoms. Like you couldn't. Get condoms without getting a train, which then once you got the condoms, and you were getting on a train. So it was a good joke. I meant. Let's talk for you about. I'm so curious because I don't know if I actually have ever read this how did savage love. I get started Tim calc who is one of the two guys who've created and founded the onion to invented writing bullshit in the AP style sold the onion investments kansin million years ago and was moving to Seattle to start an art weekly paper in Seattle because that's where his girlfriend wanted to live with literally why they pick Seattle. They went there. They thought the weekly they're sucked, and they were gonna go start a weekly and put it about weekly out of business, which in the end he did. And I met him at a party introduced by friend. And I said, oh, he's telling me about his paper. And I said you should have an advice column because everybody reads, those you see that CUNY format you can't not read it. And he said excellent adviser at the advice column for my newspaper, and I wasn't angling for the gig. I'd never really written anything for publication at the point. And we begin to sort of like joke about you know, he's starting to straight newspaper straight all weekly newspapers in nineteen Ninety-one. This was way back when there weren't gay people writing in the New York Times, and we're openly gay just wasn't kind of thing. And so we joked about what that column if I was getting gives sex advice to straight people and straight readers as a gay guy. What that would look like I wanted to call the column he faggot because it kind of the same rhythm as dear Abby and the same big flat Chicago. Hey fag. Dear Abby, and the idea was I was going to treat straight people in straight sex with the same contempt and revulsion that straight advice columnists and always treated gay people engage sex with and it was just a joke. And I was going to do it for six months or a year..

Chicago Seattle Abby Austin college Catholic university Catholic u New York Times Milwaukee AP Tim seventy five eighty percent thirteen fourteen year fifteen years million years six months
"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

04:17 min | 1 year ago

"dan savage" Discussed on QUEERY with Cameron Esposito

"Also, today's guest is writer podcast, her advice columnist, Dan savage. We agree about a few things. We disagree about a bunch of things. It is a good conversation. Please enjoy. Be Lynn still. No, no, no careless. So I want to start by asking you to introduce yourself. Everybody all my guests introduce themselves. You don't have to wear it on your full ears. Whatever feels comfy. Yeah. Ooh. Are we recording? Now, I'm Dan savage. I'm primarily known to writing savage love, syndicated sex and relationship advice column, which I've been writing since nineteen ninety one and I've been doing the savage love cast my podcast for I think ten or eleven years now, and yeah, that's about I executive editor of the stranger in Seattle. And I've written some books and carefully. Get to run my mouth on television, occasionally, run myself into a ditch running my mouth, which is something that everybody runs their mouth for a living. Eventually does show or repeatedly does. And it's a nice gig. Yeah. Well, I think I've I mean, I've had the chance to say this to you. I think you said this to you like years ago, you came to see me do stand up, but really for context for our listeners. A you're actually like a very important person to me because when I was first coming out, I knew zero where people zero zero people we were both raised really Catholic. We're both raised in Chicago. And I was living in. Austin? And the Phoenix Boston Phoenix weekly. Ran your column ranch average love and dearly. Departed Boston beams. Yes. So sad. Actually, like, I really loved old weeklies. So. The word. I know. Feels like maybe would like them even more. But. Be I really loved reading that. And that column. Your column. Really? I mean, truly was like the first thing that gave me context at all for a real for real life clearness and for gate relationships and for because other than that, it was all scripted stuff. It was unclear as the internet. Yes. Many many many more diverse and sometimes smarter queer voices than mine for which I'm grateful, but I've heard that from a lot of queer people also from a lot of straight people, which is often very that. I was the queer person that you got to know when you did know any other queer people, but also for a lot of straight readers. I was the gay guy that they got to know before they knew any queer people, and nothing does homophobia like knowing someone who's gay, and I was a lot of young straight people that gay guy that they knew, and it's a it's a real honor and into thrill when when people say that I hear that less and less from younger people because they have access the internet. There's more quit representations people on television. There's Rachel Maddow. There's Anderson Cooper's there's ten thousand queer podcasters and people with their own blogs. And thank you. Matt previously has been delivered to as we talk. Because this is what it's like to be clear now, wait till meadows on TV and people just deliver sparkling water. It's better. It got better. Did get better as someone once said. Yeah. Yes. Well, you know, what you know? What's interesting is like that is true. And I and I know also that you're going to agree with me on this. But that is true. That like now, there's all these people I still hear this all the time at my shows that I'm somebody's first gay person. I hear this all the time and from like, you know, sometimes like from teens and so go to be the first. Yes. Yeah. And you remember what it was like to be a young person? It was more recently for you than for me, you tended to avoid queer voices because they were speaking to a part of you that you wanted to silence or a part of you that you wanted to suppress, and it was destabilize ING sometimes to hear queer shit, and you kind of pulled away from it. So the first queer voice or novel or character in a film that spoke to you really broke through sometimes a lot of resistance because it wasn't like when I was thirteen fourteen years old and a little gay kid in Chicago. I was like, yes. Yes. Where am I game? Enter. I was like, no, no this can't be possible..

Dan savage Lynn Chicago Phoenix Boston Phoenix Rachel Maddow Anderson Cooper advice columnist writer Seattle executive editor Austin Matt thirteen fourteen years eleven years
Some pro-family groups silent, while others speak up on family separations

News, Traffic and Weather

02:55 min | 2 years ago

Some pro-family groups silent, while others speak up on family separations

"Pelosi blasted this policy and cited warnings from the american academy of pediatrics that family detentions pose a danger to children's health and can result in lifelong consequences for educational achievement economic productivity health status and longevity pelosi said the president's policies are quote outside the circle of civilized human behavior serious matter to protect our border it's also a matter to protect our values what he's doing with zero tolerance and and that applies to those seeking amnesty so undermines who we are as a country one version of the gop backed immigration bill failed to pass a house vote thursday voting on another was postponed democrats have introduced their own bills to address the separation issue keith makoni kcbs a group of twelve san mateo county moms adleman gathering donations and are flying to texas today to try to help families who have been separated the border kcbs and meghan golsby has more it was at a luncheon last saturday that congresswoman jackie speier was telling a group of women about her upcoming trip to mcallen texas to see the detention centers holding children for herself lily rae was there she talked about the contingent of congress congressional engine that was going to mcallen and brownsville and we said what can we do and we came up with this plan she a group of eleven other moms fly out today armed with closed toys activities even kitchen supplies for the families in mcallen leah turk says it all came together very quickly lots and lots of people from our extended communities of brought things by and donated so it's not just the twelve she says as moms they just decided they couldn't sit on the sidelines children have been separated from their parents and their families and they need to be reunited and it is just unfathomable that this is happening in twentieth century united states of america and so we'd like to do do whatever we can to support the kids and their family megan gold speak kcbs napa county sheriff's department is asking for the public's help in locating a missing sixty nine year old woman near like barry esa susan dan savage was last seen yesterday afternoon in the oak shore foxtail flat area of lake barry esa dan savage has blonde hair and blue eyes she's five feet three is thin and weighs one hundred and forty pounds dan average was asking wearing a blue t shirt black yoga pants white flipflops anyone that caesar is urged to contact the napa county sheriff's department or dial nine one one just ahead on kcbs we'll have more on a discrimination emanating in san francisco cbs news time now is one away we are first for traffic let's get the first report for the one o'clock hour and here's all then it's so troublesome on the bay bridge right now eighty westbound after the island the three right lanes are blocked while emergency vehicles deal with a car fire excuse me this adds onto the three right lanes.

Pelosi American Academy Of Pediatrics Sixty Nine Year Forty Pounds Five Feet
"dan savage" Discussed on Katie Couric

Katie Couric

01:54 min | 3 years ago

"dan savage" Discussed on Katie Couric

"Dance writing and well dan himself actually is by turns wither rain empathetic hilarious brutally honest a little dirty and always always fearless and for dam the personal is definitely political he often writes about abortion laws contraception gay rights hiv and aids and he is no stranger to taking on politicians as well most notably rick santorum and you're going to have to google that one because i really am not going to describe it we covered a lot of ground in this conversation from dance childhood to how he became a columnists his love affair with ann landers which is fascinating his it gets better campaign how he feels about donald trump and that by the way not very kindly not evolve shared all sorts of things and between so here's our conversation with dan savage with all due respect to the dose that case man i think you're of the most interesting man in the world you have done so many things just reading about you i think what hasn't dan savage done you've written books euhosted hosted podcasts you've led advocacy campaigns we're going to get into all that in a moment but first we want to talk about your longrunning advice column called savage love you've been doing it for 25 years when you're colin first came out 1991 it was a very new phenomenon wasn't at a gay man giving francs sexual and relationship advice to mostly straight people first the or do you move the concept resort was just gonna be a joke residue for six months you're and i was going to treat the street people and street sex with the same contempt and revulsion the utter sexual straight lady advice calm retreated gay people basics with.

rick santorum ann landers donald trump dan savage colin aids google six months 25 years