35 Burst results for "DAD"
Dr. Shauna Shapiro on using mindfulness to help grow our emotional resources and our childrens self regulation.
"So I'm open. I'm ready. Can a couple of minutes a day? Do Anything. Absolutely, in fact, change happens in a moment right? We also have an A. Or insight, and it also happens over time and so there's this kind of interesting paradox or juxtaposition that you don't want to limit what change can happen 'cause I've seen huge change happened a moment and you also don't want to underestimate the power of subtle changes over time, and that's why my theme is. What you practice grows stronger than really the only thing you have control over is setting your intention setting your compass direction you WanNa head over and over as best you care not perfectly everyday practice mattis taking a deep breath today and again tomorrow practice counting to three before you snap at your child practice putting your hand on your heart and often yourself kindness once today. And love those because it's so. Manageable and rate. Now, if we can take those small moments, it's incredible if you just yeah find those moments of breath. How different your interaction can be with your family. Absolutely, and also the body would I've noticed recently 'cause as I said, we have four kids and a dog in their lives chaos going on. Is really softening body because what I noticed that sometimes in the kitchen and unlike braced for war A. Tie My shoulders here in like my buds pledged district to soften rate in just just leading the body settled and I feel my feet night truly wiggle my toes because that unlike there we go and so I think it's really about remembering and so had we remember is we practice in eventually it becomes a habit I remember growing up whenever my daddy get angry and we all know he really you could feel it he would close his eyes. And he would take a deep breath with his handling this. And I was normal I thought that's what you did. That's appearance do when they get angry and it would always calm him down not that he would be super happy afterwards yet that was his automatic habit when instead of the Elliott you that's what he would do and what I realized from that is it wasn't that my dad didn't get angry wasn't that he was perfect he got angry. But that was his goal to practice, and so if we can start to implement these practices in our life, it's like when I get angry, I put my hands behind Madonna. Hop on one foot I don't really care what it is interrupt your pattern and interrupt superhighways of habit so that we can start to carve out new pathways and what you just described with your father sounds like it was constructive. He wasn't not getting angry because sometimes you do need to get angry to meet whatever your emotional goal is is self-regulation is just it's intentional and so that breath made his anger tension on I imagine sometimes when he took the breath, he was like actually. I'm that that anger not where I wanna go I don't know better know his experience but having that moment to I would love for you to talk a little bit about making those emotions constructive instead of just pretending they're not they're exactly. So what this does is it allows us to have the full spectrum of motion. It's not saying push. Those are bad never have does it saying being human? You're going to have the full spectrum, but you need to know how to wisely. Relate to regulate your emotions and so when anger comes up, what mindfulness does is puts you back choice it doesn't say that you're not gonNA still be angry, but you're backing choice. So you can use the anger wisely instead of reactively and causing more harm and I think that's really the key to to mindful -regulation of motion is we welcome all of our emotions we see them clearly, and then we respond
Suspect Arrested In Fatal South Los Angeles Hit-And-Run That Killed Father
"Southland residents are not only seeing a big spike in murders. They're also dealing with an endless number of severe or fatal hit and run cases, Authorities say. One of them though, just got solved. Police say the suspect was driving a stolen vehicle when he slammed into a dad riding bikes with his two young Children. On July 8th. The dad was fatally injured. The kids were hurt, and the suspect took off on foot through various investigative leads. We were able to identify 26 year old voice of Los Angeles. He was already in jail for something else when they caught up to him, But now he's being held on $2 million bail for hitting and killing. Jorge Guerra, Sarah's daughter says the grieving family is grateful, but they want to see the end of all the carnage from hit and run cases. What happened to my father was just one of the many casualties caused here in South Los Angeles. Traffic violence, the officer notes. The drivers must stop after hitting somebody, or else the consequences are much more severe. It actually compounds the matter into further, more serious charge is, in fact, a suspect in this case is facing a murder account. In addition to a list of other charges in south L, A. John Baird, Kay and X 10 70 NewsRadio,
Harry Styles leaves fan a note after his car breaks down near her house
"Harry styles, I guess had a flat tire and I need a little help and, interestingly A huge fan of his. That's where he stopped her house. But the sad thing is she wasn't home. So he left her a note saying, Theodora, my car broke down on your street and your dad's friend kindly let me wait at your house with a cup of tea. He noted that he fed her fish took photos with the fish. They were posted on his Twitter page. On and she, of course probably heart broken that she wasn't there when her you know, big pop star has showed up that she loved so much. The fish that he fed is also named Harry. So there you
State trooper dates Cuomo’s daughter, gets transferred close to Canada
"State trooper dates. Cuomo's daughter gets transferred close to Canada Of course, his daughter. Is. Is he also the daughter of Carrie Kennedy? Bobby? She's a Kennedy. A state trooper assigned the governor Andrew Cuomo. Security detail got hot and heavy with one of New York's first daughters and was soon transferred to a post near the Canadian border. Ah, trooper they didn't fight for 35 minute. Cara Kennedy Cuomo 25 through his job was one of her dad's bodyguards. They began invading abundance about seven months ago and And now he's almost in
Election 2020: Polls unclear, lots of new voters
"Enough people to get the most accurate polling possible. And even the polling that was done for Franklin and Marshall. The total sample was less than 600 people. 558 likely Pennsylvania voters. Between October 19th and the 25th with a margin of error of 5% points. There's also the issue of You still have a lot of Trump supporters. At least their argument is The Trump supporters are not being honest with the posters. And it's not so much an issue of willful dishonesty. I mean, they're not lying from their perspective. What they are is just answering in a way that is most socially desirable to answer. Maybe not an overwhelming number of people, but enough Trump's supporters that even to a pollster They know it's not popular. To say that there are trump supporter and let's be honest. I mean, ever since Trump declared to run all the way through to this very day, the maybe for a glimpse in time in the past 5.5 6 years. He had approval numbers above 50%. Most of his time. He's been in the low forties, so you could argue that it's just not Socially acceptable to say that you're a trump supporter, even to a pollster. So they think that there are those who are just not being honest enough with pulses for their own reasons. And that the polls even after 2016 still struggling to get it right, where state Poles underestimate Republican strength in the Midwest and in Florida. Where the underrated the GOP's final margin 28 of 33 different times. And that the polls also underestimated the Republican leading Florida in 2018 and North Carolina in 2019. Southwest a bit of a different issue where Democrats aren't Their margins. They undershot those numbers. 17 of 19 times where it really matters, though, is what's happening here in Pennsylvania and Right now, when you look at the It's like a place like really clear politics where they aggregate all of the polls. And you're now within a margin that is within the margin of error is like 3.8% and most poles that are being mixed into that process, have margins of errors that are around four averaging it all out, so clearly they could be making the mistake. The opposite direction. Next thing you know, Baez, not up, 38. Trump is up points to On the flip side, it could be Biden up 78. That's where we are and the importance of Pennsylvania. It's critical. There's no state that has as much influence On what happens with the Electoral College than Pennsylvania does. This is it. You have a giant state like California. They have no influence because everybody knows where they're going. New York the same way. Maybe the biggest Republican state that was a lock four years ago. That is now kind of a toss up. But this point His Texas There's a real possibility that Texas could flip and go Blue and that that's the case The party's over doesn't make a difference with Pennsylvania does at that point No or any challenges that the Trump campaign would make. To what happens here in Pennsylvania. But according to Fivethirtyeight, They say that of all the states, Pennsylvania has a 40% chance of being the decisive state. Which means Everybody's vote counts. Everybody's vote matters. If you're a soft supporter for somebody make it a point to go vote. Because your vote's going to count in this And considering how close like Connor Lamb one in his first You run for Congress. Was what one vote per precinct. Could you get margins, potentially that tight across the Commonwealth between Biden Trump Very likely. What's also interesting to is that the surge of new voters That is coming this time around. Estimated that more than 16 million voters who did not cast a ballot in 2016 have already voted this year. Imagine that 60. Million people that didn't vote four years ago have already voted. This year. Toe, let alone the people who will go to the polls and actually vote in person. Then the question becomes out of these new voters. Are they more likely to be Biden voters or Trump voters? If you didn't vote four years ago Who are you voting for It Love to hear 866391 at 10 20. For whatever reason you didn't vote. Maybe you were too young to vote. Maybe you just sat out that one in thought Dad's Trump in Hillary. I'm not voting on this thing, but you're voting this time around. Love the here. Young people
Debra Messing; AJCs Groundbreaking State of Antisemitism in America Report
"Messing is probably best known for her role as Grace Adler on the long running Sitcom will and grace. She has starred in movies and even been the voice behind cartoons. But for the past several months, she has been one of the voices behind a podcast called the dissenters since May Deborah and her co host Donna Damiani have interviewed men and women who have made their. Mark Challenging the status quo but the penultimate episode that aired this month was particularly powerful Deborah and her co host invited Dr Edith Eba eager a ninety three year old Holocaust survivor to share her memories of the past and thoughts on present day politics and the future Deborah is here now to talk about that episode and her own experiences with anti-semitism Deborah. Welcome. Thank you so much. So tell us about this podcast, the dissenters what you're trying to accomplish with each episode and how your conversation with Dr Eager Fit that theme. The dissenters created as a response to the suffering that we saw around our country over the last few years, and also in response to the activists that have stepped forward and taken it upon themselves to try and make things better. My friend Montana Diani, she is the CO host. She was a religious refugee came to the country at six years old she and I have both been very active in activism reading these pieces about these extraordinary people from around the world doing extraordinary things, and we would send them to each other in order to sort of buoy each other when we. Would start to feel overwhelmed and it always sort of kept us moving forward and one day we just realized that as much as was uplifting us it would most likely uplift other people to hear about the works of these what we call accidental activists we wanted to ultimately inspire and empower people to recognize that you don't have to have a certain education. You don't have to have a certain following and social media in order to be an activist all you have to do is just recognize something feels wrong and take one step towards doing something touted doctor eager fit into this lineup. She is a ninety three year old Holocaust survivor. Who came face to face with Dr Mangala when she was a teenager at the camps, she lost her mom and dad and went through horrible torture and trauma, and came to America and created a family and. Got A PhD and has used her experience and trauma in order to help people coming home from war to heal from their trauma. She has written two books and she decided to become a healer. And we just felt like she did not have any idea what her life would be. Once she got out of the concentration camp. Yeah and she was able to look towards the future to have hope and ultimately choose to do something that would help others. How did you first discover Dr Eager Montana and I are just really really curious people. So we are constantly reading. We are watching Ted talks. It was a Ted talk of her that we saw and ultimately we felt given the fact that there is this surge of anti-semitism and racial strife in our country that it felt particularly timely and important to highlight her and her journey because in our research, we discovered that three quarters of millennials who are people who are in their mid thirties do not know what Auschwitz is such a stunning statistic and kind of unimaginable that we felt like, okay. This it's incumbent on us to have someone who was there and lived it to assert that it really did happen and to celebrate her as well. You mentioned the lack of knowledge about concentration camps AJC. Of course, just released its first report on the state of anti-semitism in. America. And found that more than half of Americans don't know the meaning of the word anti-semitism. Some haven't even heard the word before. With Charlottesville and. Is seemingly explosion of white nationalism and Antisemitism Nazis everywhere in juxtaposition to the second wave of civil rights protesting it's very interesting that people don't protest against anti-semitism people flood the streets, for racism. And when you look at Charlottesville, the Nazis were screaming about two groups about black people and Jews. And we really are the most natural allies in the world and it really was just something that I just sat with for a while about like why is it that people don't protest four us? You're Jewish grew up in a predominantly non Jewish environment. Did you experience anti-semitism growing up I? Did? Can you speak to that a little bit? Sure. I remember I was in second grade and we were lining up. To go to Jim and I got in line and a little boy me and said, get to the back of the line Kaik And I didn't know what the word meant the teacher overheard and immediately grabbed the boy and sent him down to the principal's office I. Remember everyone looking at me like I had done something wrong. And as much as I didn't understand what was happening I understood that it would have been better if I just stayed silent and I just wanted the board to come back and everybody to just be normal and stop looking at me and a couple of years later it was Halloween and my grandfather was visiting and we woke up and a swastika was painted on his car. In our driveway. And I recall my mother just standing at the front door looking at it and I felt her fear I felt endanger and I, remember no one said a word. Just, you know my mom said get in the house. And somehow the car disappeared. And we didn't talk about it. and. So it became very clear to me from a very young age that I was an other. That I was different from everybody the community and that difference wasn't good. And Somehow I had taken on a sense of shame about the fact that I was Jewish and I actually recall in highschool. My father was president of the Temple President of the Jewish Federation. My mother was Vice President of the Jewish Federation very, very, very active in the community. And we would stay home obviously for the High Holidays and I remember coming back in after the High Holidays and someone saying, why were you out and I said, oh, it was yom. Kippur and. He got really mad they were like. How come you get that off and you get Christmas off? Why don't we get off and after that encounter anytime I would stay home because of a Jewish holiday I would lie and say that I had been sick. Wow. I WANNA, go back to your conversation with Dr Eager and I'd like for you to share what your biggest takeaways were. It's so powerful because she speaks about will lasting that her mother said to her in the cattle car. That essentially reality is whatever you have in your mind and in your heart. And bad things pass trauma passes and her first night there. Joseph Mangla went into the barracks and made her dance and she loved opera and she said that she got through it because she imagined that she was on a stage and they were playing Makovsky Romeo and Juliet. And she said and I danced beautifully and I loved it. That's how I survived. For me what was really remarkable was hearing everything that she went through and the fact that she landed. was that she was grateful for all of the terror and trauma and pain that she had experienced. She felt that she literally calls them a gift. That is something that is so amped medical to the way at least. I think about someone who has survived the Holocaust it really was a full paradigm shift for me to hear how she got there and ultimately how she healed herself. Yeah. Well, certainly, the testimonies of the survivors are a gift to all of us in terms of preserving the memory and the lessons that we can take from their experiences. So thank you for giving Dr, eager another platform to share that story with another audience that needs to learn and learn the lessons of her experience. I will tell you one of the most moving parts for me was the separation from her mother when they got to Auschwitz and how the experience of children being separated from their parents at the border was a trigger for her honestly I can't do it justice. Let's listen to a clip. Van. Is Show children being separated that their border? I had terrible night mash. Remember him and my mother was. Towed to go this way, I followed my mother. And this guy told me that I'm GONNA see my mother very soon. She just GonNa take a shower and promptly I was on the other side which meant life. So you see mandating trigger today for the me The time and everything was taken from me. Why was it important to include that in the podcast? I. Think when we witnessed that kind of wrongdoing that is really a crime against humanity, it reminds us how fragile we are. That we don't learn from the past potentially and we have to be vigilant every day in making sure that what we are putting out into the world is modeling compassionate. Inclusion.
How do you feel about Halloween?
"Do you guys feel about Halloween? I'm not a big halloween person like in general during. In general used to be my favorite holiday especially in New York City like it. It was like really my favorite holiday and then last year was like really exciting because my daughter was to last year like the first time she could like walk from door to door she doesn't remember it but my neighborhood like goes all out. So like literally like we we we left the house with our drinks and then like every single person in our neighborhood and then people from other neighborhoods like friends we just happened to run in everybody's drinking on the street and your kids are getting candy and it's just like. A love it. This year we were trying to organize a thing are your kids going to Halloween this year? So we're GONNA have my sister and my nephews over, and we're GONNA like we're sort of trying to. We're trying to figure out what we'RE GONNA. Do I think we're going to? Trick or treat in the. House behind each and maybe do a holiday craft or something so. What are you going to jail? Scottie has a great tradition tradition. This year I don't know if we are normally I. My friend memory, heart who. Loves Halloween. We started about seven years ago. She was like, do you just want to hand out candy to kids? I was like that's perfect. We put on whatever costumes we had handy and we saw salt we handed out like we sold We made a lot of money. We ended out like. I mean maybe a thousand pieces of candies. So we were like one person would run the CVS and by five more bags because it's it's actually the same neighborhood as Kurt and it's just known as a safe neighborhood with tons. It's flat, which is also in La kind of a thing like you don't want to walk up and down the hills. And so now we rent a frozen Margarita machine. And for the parents, we hand out to go cups of frozen Margaritas. Get Candy and now there's three or four of us. We decorate her yard and smoke machines and all that. But it got to the point two years ago where people are like you're the Margarita House and then. Like the dodgers are in the world series now and the dodgers are usually in the playoffs. So like the DADS will come halfway into memories householding. Margarita, watching the dodgers game behind this while we hand out candy and. It's still you know they're so nice. I, gotTa say there are so polite like it's it's awesome. So this year we might do she has sort of like the gate to her fence is like one of those old barn doors where the top to the bottom open. So we might just barn door and then we'll probably skip the MARGARITAS sadly this year just hand out bags of pre bagged candy, underrun out. I don't know kids are going to trick or treating or not because I know that. Whoever is not the? CDC whoever like someone? Some official body locally was like. They you're not allowed to trick or treat now accounting and that's what I thought too. Yeah. Yeah they're just like the. newsome Moose and was just like right. Halloween's canceled. We're just like we organized with our neighbors I. think There's GonNa be like three houses and we're going to have a bowl of candy in front of each house. Like socially distance walk the three kids from one place to the other to the other and then let them walk around outside and then it's over thirty minutes in and done
Playing to Win With Shawn Harper
"We are back on the virtual state of the Authority projects. You are the project and we WANNA slept with thirty two your name so you can sell what you're great at in. We have a treat for you today and his name is Sean Hopper. He is a former. Nfl Player. I loved the failed love football all day every day. Like I said we can probably talk about that for an hour. But we're not here for that. We're here to to make sure that you finish off strong in twenty twenty but before we dive in. Please tell US Shawn first of all who you are personally and professionally personally. Shaun Harper personally a warrior. I'm a child of God. I don't hide that. I think that often is huge. And so what? I'll just you know go there you know speaking with. Your Voice of WHO? You are mentally spiritually socially is is is extremely important if you WANNA win in two thousand twenty and end in two thousand twenty one Born raised in the south side of Columbus Ohio Had had had a very interesting childhood. But I've learned how to rebrand my adversity By looking for opportunities in looking at it from a perspective of gratitude professionally like you mentioned plate seven years professional football with the rams with the colts retired. And now I Not only run. I have my own firm for almost twenty years. I teach people how to win. That's me I love it awesome. I am so excited So tell us right now before we go further in. Tell us what project. You're currently working on right now. We know what right yes short. I just finished my first Coaching course it's it's it's actually finished. It's so new that I'm not even gonNA advertise today. A Shaun Harper wins. Probably some time next week. It'll be up but I am so excited about that in house actually challenged because you know I cut my teeth on speaking so I travel in speak all over the world and people have been challenging me like you know what this great. You're able to speak great. You have a platform but you know what when you leave. You're gone you know where the books so I hadn't heard him get books like where's your courses and so I had my first course finishing s what. I'm working on right now. Okay great okay. So let's let's get into it. Let's get into it. Tell us where do you begin? Tell us your journey like what took it to this place where you're in the space of being on stage. You're doing courses now. You're you're writing books to inspire others the that all Derived FROM OKAY. So in order for you to For me to really explain that I have to give a little back story of my personal life of my upbringing. In a kind of forced a shift in my perspective ideology and my thinking born born and raised in the south side of Columbus Ohio. And most people think you know if you play professional football your business owner you must have had great opportunities growing up silver spoon in the mouth and you know nothing. Nothing I promise you. Nothing could be further than the truth. I struggle started early a as a a product of a single home environment. Mom was mom and Dad End in Butler made whatever you have as what she wasn't. She raised six of us all by herself. Amazing six kids. One house bathroom Mom did that. She's she's a remarkable woman Educationally I really suffered a had to repeat the first grade document with four to five learning disabilities by ten miles in the fifth grade. I was kicked out of two schools for disciplinary issues Left Highschool with the one point. Six two accumulative Jeff. Nine Alesi T. A. in fact I didn't even start in a well. I barely started in high school football. I wasn't honorable. Mention all conference all city allstate or intergalactic. None of that in fact I would. I would sit at the banquets now. The other way in the back eating at nasty court on blue and guys are getting into audience. Awards and I was just so upset. I wouldn't I wouldn't tell no one but I was extremely depressed. Angry in in fact. I was voted most likely to fail in. Know right here From graduating last in my class in academics I get a phone call from junior college two year school in Iowa. And you're like Sean. We want you to come to Mason City Iowa. Junior college to play football coach. Believes you have this thing called potential. You know what a that and a I go to the Cornfield. The cornfields of Mason City Iowa in the first year at the junior college. I sat the bench the entire season. Not One play and I remember calling my mom like mom I quit. You know I give up. I'm done know know I'm I'm expecting Montlake. Baby you try come on home the opposite boy state you. You Ain't coming home like what are you coming home to get violent. Just just things in home. No don't get stale way and sometimes that shift is good for kids and so going into the second year. I had a conversation with myself and the conversation was more on the lines of you're right or they're right. You don't have the education. You don't have the accusation. You horwood football you suck right now. Okay There's no way you can be successful right but you can win. You can win and the moment I made that paradigm that shift in my mind you can win. I begin to look at life differently. A beginning look at life as a challenge to begin to look at opportunities that I've never seen like I begin to macgyver. Life right and I went from sitting on a bench with the winning mindset that I was able to adapt if you want to expand on that to being you know junior college hall of Fame All Region Full Scholarship Indiana University draft any. Nfl Pick in fourth run to taking the same concept of winning and bringing bringing it to corporate America.
Struggling Rental Market Could Usher in Next American Housing Crisis
"The Federal Reserve says that renters could be on the hook for more than seven billion dollars in overdue payments. By the end of the year other estimates put the much higher and when eviction protections expire that can have a domino effect on the housing market. Our housing reporter Will Parker is here to explain we'll thanks for being here. Thanks for having me. Now, the eviction protections are one thing, but the actually making it any easier for renters to make monthly payments. So you're seeing a large number of renters who are not able. To make their payments and although there is a eviction moratorium that does nothing to absolve the debt that they are accruing through months of Amiss payment and what the concern really is that this debt is growing with every month that passes in the pandemic as unemployment remains high and as certain benefits such as expanded unemployment have expired. So that is hit to low income renters but it is also a hit to the owners of the properties they live in who have mortgage is and who may be in financial trouble soon as well. But if unemployment remains high, a lot of these people may not be able to resume paying rent once the protections expire that's a huge concern because you seven months end to this pandemic. Some people may find themselves in a position where they have work again where they get. access to income again, and they're making wages similar to what they were before but they still might have several months of that. They still have to pay and their wages may not be enough to both cover their future repayments, their expenses, as well as their rent dad from the months in which they were unemployed. So there is a huge concern that that summer interest simply will never be able to pay off what the Oh how's the rental market faring during the pandemic as compared to other areas of the real estate market. This pandemic is highlighting some of. The key differences and advantages and setbacks between being a renter and being a homeowner. So you know homeowners who are in trouble they have certain financial options, right? They can take out an extra mortgage if they have to perhaps they can modify their current mortgage. There are forbearance programs for homeowners, but but most renters do not have this ability to simply refinance what there are behind on. So the situation for Renter's right now, I think it is a much more difficult on now among renters who being hit the hardest by this problem. So unemployment in this pandemic has A. Lower income wage, hourly wage workers, and service industry workers, the most, and those are the same people who researchers believe account for the lion's share of the unpaid rent in the housing market right now, also census survey data indicates that non white renters tend to be more likely to be behind on their rent payments right now have higher income renters been insulated in any way from the economic hardship. So some. Of the best data that we have on rent and rent payments come from about eleven, million apartments that are so called professionally managed apartment buildings and these these renters tend to be higher in common pay rents that are higher than the median, and even in those buildings recent Alice's showed that missed rent payments are up seven percent over last year. So that strain is even being you know up the income ladder. From the lowest income individuals and how what the landlords how faring during this it's different for different types of landlords. You know some who are very flush with cash right now or have larger serves have large investors they've been among the most willing to kind of ride this out to you know, let tenants continue to stay without paying rent or putting them on some. Sort of payment plan so that something comes in every month even if it's not everything and that that's definitely a part of the housing market there are other landlords who have been less tolerant who are filing addictions where a local laws allow them to and who have loaded up tenants with late fees on top of the rent that they already. Oh, so it. There's a there's a whole range of responses from from landlords on this, and certainly the ones who feel the most at risk to losing their properties through foreclosure. For example, for not being able to make their mortgage payments are are the ones who are you know likely to react the hardest to ten it's not being able to pay now as rent debt continues. To rise in people's economic situations you know don't get any better. WHAT'S THE WORST CASE SCENARIO ECONOMISTS FEAR? The worst case scenario that I think most people looking at this fear is is a large wave of addictions and a lot of advocates have been talking about this for several months. It hasn't happened in large part because of the various protections that that do exist. Perhaps, also, because many landlords sort of look at the economy right now and look at the housing market and think if I start addicting lots of my tenants, who am I going to replace them with but again as as these protections expire if they if they do indeed expire and without significant changes in the economy or some sort of stimulus some people argue that these actions seem inevitable too many people
Willow Smith Calls Out Jada's Parenting Style
"Are you running for some daily pop? Cuz we've got some Smith family drama for you today. Willow is coming after her met her mother questioning her parenting skills at her own red cable. Are you kidding me? This is Jaden was harder on her than on her brother Jaden during a new episode of red table. Talk on Facebook watch Willow shares just how differently they were treated great up. There is a difference between how black moms will treat their daughters and their son. Oh, oh my goodness, right? Let's go back through is true something as simple as just like getting up at the right time. It would be like you might like to maybe like, oh no school school is about to be you better get dressed. We need to get it would be like wage in my room like, okay got it. But then Jane is actually like nothing listed. Are you ready to and he'd be like, maybe one moment off? Thank you. She is asking for a debt said it's right there honey you to me where you have a black bar? But you don't question her parenting in front of everybody. I do think Jade is one of those people that's very open communication. Tell me how you feel kind of mother one hundred percent. But I also think in black families and I will save this growing up in a big family and the hood a lot of times moms and parents are harder on girls because there's this thing ingrained in your head that if something happens with your daughter your daughter gets pregnant or becomes a birth mother. It's a direct reflection on you. So a lot of times like people don't even care about the father they like, oh near that boy knocked her up, but the mother there's a lot of shame that goes on the parents and growing up my mother never talked to me about the birds and the bees at all. My sister got schooled in it from the time. She was thirteen years old and it's weird that that's how it works like, yep. Just saw this whole thing happened with t i, yeah and how crazy everybody was like, oh my God. This is so insane. Meanwhile, I'm like, oh that happens. All those on you know, I think has a lot to do with also on the Note just you know, as a mother myself. I feel like for a woman you have to be very strong. Like I wanted to be so secure in her self-confidence seems to be like the most important thing you can instill in my daughter and being confident means like you get up you show up on time. You work hard you put in your best and you feel good about it. And so like I can see that and it's so funny that example because literally off hook up Chase from a nap the other day, he's to mind you and I said Chase are you awake? You ready to go? Five more minutes mom and I was like, okay honey UT five more minutes. You need a rest. I don't know if it's just a little boy, but it was just a funny example. I'm like, this is already a happening in my life. And there are only two right I feel like mothers and suck. So that Dynamic is very unique. Like I definitely think that women and parents think that they can be harder on girls because I feel like they think girls can handle it. I feel like with boys. I feel like a mom. I see it with my own mom and my own old dog, like he has always been regardless of what drama or what he's had to go through. He's always sort of Taken extra good care of him. I just feel like if it's a boy and you're a mom you just have an extra soft spot regardless of race or anything like that. I just think moms and sons have a different Bond. It's like dads and daughters. I feel like whatever child you have. That's the opposite gender of you. You are a little bit softer towards I can see that I totally can totally stay. I think the dynamic is now shifting I think with the world shifting and now, you know having to have harder conversations with boys at younger ages kind of the same ones you kind of have a girl about consent and about sex and all of those things. I feel like with everybody being mindful of this patriarchy Society. I think that's going to flip and it's going to change a little bit. Yeah. Yep. Think yeah, I hope I mean I still feel like just because of how I'm positioned. I'm like I already feel like I have to be like, you know, you you fight for what you deserve you are equal to your counterparts, you know, I feel like that stuff you have to like push into daughter still because if you don't if they don't think that going growing up then they accept less than and that's where I feel like we've gotten to the point where we got to where women, you know, they were traditionally taught that it's okay. If a man makes more, you know, if and then finally now we're getting to the other side of that and we just have to keep that momentum going like we're equal. We're all very equal talk to your son and your daughter the same way is what I guess. It's still to me and Society like I'm going to still push up for Chase, but I feel like it's almost a given still for a man to get equal. I mean, I'm still like given like he's going to get it cuz he's got that leg up because he's going to be a man. Yeah and the woman I have to be like make sure you get your your peace Honey Pig. To caution her you have to prepare her for that reality because men don't face that as much which is the problem. I mean, even in our own lives and our own circumstances, we know people that are of different genders and might make more than us or do more than us, but they don't work as much as we do, that's happening right now. So it's just one of those things you just constantly have to be aware of I
Britney Spears' dad Jamie challenges singer's lawyer for speaking on her behalf
"Is going after her lawyer, Jamie Spears found new legal documents in Britney's ongoing conservatorship case, which fire back at her attorney, Sam Ingham. Ingham recently compared the pop star to a comatose patient who lacks the capacity. To sign declarations. Jamie claims and um, does not have the unlimited authority to be Britney's exclusive voice. Guitar center
Britney Spears' dad Jamie challenges singer's lawyer for speaking on her behalf
"Is going after her lawyer, Jamie Spears found new legal documents in Britney's ongoing conservatorship case, which fire back at her attorney, Sam Ingham. Ingham recently compared the pop star to a comatose patient who lacks the capacity. To sign declarations. Jamie claims and um, does not have the unlimited authority to be Britney's exclusive voice. Guitar center
Ways To Get Women Highly Involved in Retirement Planning With Marcia Mantell
"Hello and welcome to another top advisor marketing podcast. We don't often bring somebody on like my guest Marsha today. And here's why most wage. I don't think there's enough people like her out there. She has an author blogger a retirement industry expert and the author of a couple of books that we're going to talk about today. Now. My favorite thing about March is be fundamentally understands how important it is for you as a financial services professional to Market communicate and help women make decisions when it comes to retirement because it is different you can think to yourself that it's not but you're wrong and we're going to talk about being wrong today and how to make it right Marshall. Welcome to the boss man. Thank you so much for having me. And that was quite an intro. Well, thank you a static. Well, I did we had such a fun pre-call and I was so excited. I saw your on my calendar today and I'm like, I love this lady so wage. All right. First off it just does give us a little bit of a foundation here. How did you become a retirement industry expert in an author of multiple books? Well, you know like many things Matt wage was I fell into it happenstance and sometimes you just walk through a door because someone opened it for you and Wallah you end up having a thirty year career change in my case. I ended up walking through the door at Fidelity Investments back in nineteen. Ninety two as they were I call it inventing the rollover IRA and I got put on an account team that needed to support the marketing and product efforts for the rollover Ira which of course now has become the be-all end-all of our entire business. I thought it was exciting. It was like the wild west and it lasted for thirteen years, which was all good. But meanwhile, I had these two amazing young girls, I was trying to raise at home. And Corporate America and motherhood does not always quite aligned. So I stepped out at Fidelity and said, you know what I need to figure out something different so that I'm not always screaming at my poor kids and I started mental retirement Consulting and just hit fifteen years of doing business consultancy work with the financial firm and financial advisors around the country. Is it specifically directed at women or just your experience in the industry overall? Great idea question here. The women piece evolved over time is what I would say we started out just trying to Grapple with and get our arms around this thing called retirement, you know, in nineteen. Ninety two, the 401K was only twelve years old. Well ten years old really and we were all just trying to figure this thing out and saving for retirement. What did that mean? And you dabbled in it off? Well after thirty years, it has become abundantly clear that women have very different retirements than men they're ill-prepared and they don't even often know how to get their arms around getting themselves prepared for another 30 year chapter. So it has happened over time. It has built over time and for me, I mean you May notice Matt I am a woman. So I'm particularly concerned, you know self-serving for my own benefits and my own retirement and my own ability to navigate the very complicated Financial world that we all live in and so just over time things evolved from being broad retirement zeroing in on two women and what women really nice and how to get in this money game. So that's my travels through retirement and getting two women. I'm going to ask you a really dumb question because just me formulating the question just seems awfully ignorant on my behalf. But why is there such a difference? I mean, you know, we live in society together. Why is there such a fundamental need for financial services professionals to understand the differences in how women want to prepare for retirement and men want to repair for prepare for retirement? Why is there such a big difference wage? Well behavioral Finance would probably have some really academic wonderful. Research to answer that but I'm going to go a different route and I would tell you it's because men and women are fundamentally culturally Society wise. I live in the same Society. We see it differently in our roles are different add to that. The laws that have been written around retirement have been radically different for men and women. I'm going to give you two examples. The first is social security when Social Security was written it's a law so I mean keep in mind here. We've got some thousand five hundred pages of legal doctrine that supports Social Security and Medicare it is a law in in nineteen thirty-five when the Charming men in Congress were fighting this law called the Social Security Act. Society I'm using that in quotes Society was very much what we would consider today a traditional white family. The man worked outside the home the little woman stayed home. She certainly didn't have a job for pay and she raised the children. So the laws were written literally to protect her that the expectation was the man would be out in the world working wage earning a living and providing for his family up until age sixty-five at which point he would enter retirement so he couldn't retire early by the way, he would enter retirement and provide for her still by having earned a paycheck along the way so that's one example, so just even in our laws it set up where men and women are different and have different access to their money the other one though, that just slays me to this day. When I started in the retirement business again, nineteen, ninety two moms at home moms who did not have wages could only contribute $250 to an IRA 250. That was it the working dad the working husband could put in $2,000. She could only put in a hundred and fifty it wasn't until Nineteen Ninety Six, you know, that's like yesterday for me as a baby boomer like oh 1996, you know, I know that era only then could at home moms make equal contributions into an IRA. I still find that stunning. It's jaw-dropping. So women were not even allowed to stay home to raise their kids and be able to save for retirement. So yeah, we live in the same Society but the laws look at these gender roles these traditional roles. Yep. Very differently in the laws are written in that era it can sometimes take a really long time to change them. Yeah
Where do the Cowboys go from here? To the trade deadline — but as sellers instead of buyers
"The Cowboys easier to write about when they win or when they lose? Uh, they're easy to write about what they lose. When they win. People feel good. You sell more newspapers when they win. That's a proven thing. So there's that. But, man what you know now, sometimes when they're bad, they're just not interested. And they just kind of go away. Like I don't know what it's like to right about when the Detroit Lions are bad. They probably just people are waiting for the Red Wings to drop the puck. But when the Cowboys are bad, there's usually nine different things in Iraq, And this year there, there might be that might be multiplied. So there's you can just pick out of a hat. And and and go from there. What is Jerry? June Jones do now? You know, one of the really disappointments with serious disappointments, obviously of code. But one of the rial lighter disappointments of this year is that he doesn't do press conferences after every game, because I can't imagine. What level he would have reached yesterday. Um, you know, it's Tze one thing to get beat up by Seattle or airy Arizona's offense. They can't stop the run. With anybody, not the Washington football team. They run for over 200 yards. And if you want to pick one area of the Cowboys that does not beat up my injuries. Their front seven They've got Jalen Smith. They got banned arrest. They've got the Marcus Lords they've got. They've got elegance. They got Everson Griffen. They got Tyrone Crawford. They got guys were supposed to be there, and they can't tackle anybody. And then you have the hit on Andy Dalton and that nobody seems to concern about the chief shot by Jon Bostic. That wasn't it took the announcers of minutes to kind of recognize, but they did eventually, So okay, that's that's a brutal Yep. Be Amari Cooper is standing there and there's others around there had to be a number of players see it. I would think the entire offensive line and to see it. On nothing. Nothing at all. I mean, I can't imagine. If that was Dad getting hit like that that they wouldn't have done something but that that just pointed to the the give up factor of this team they looked like in the first quarter. They're out there to see when it's going to go badly, and you know how much it's going to feel like a ground hog day. They got nothing on either side of the ball, but quitting is worse than losing to him. Yeah. And of course, coaches will always and players will fight. You didn't quit. Everybody has a great attitude by when you see something like that, and when you see it That And when you see a team that just gets gassed in the run and announcers every week, whether it's the money, night crew or yesterday was was Moose. Ah lot of destroyed job back and they get very quickly. The out of position on these place. They really get outflanked quickly without defense. I mean, they're they're talking around the fact that team looks very poorly prepared and has no idea what to do in the players. Never respond if Jerry had to do over coaching. Well, I mean, that's what What was it about Mike McCarthy flying in and spending one night at the Jones house and all they were just so wowed by this guy. They couldn't believe it. Now, what have you seen in any game that he brings? You didn't call the plays so anytime the offense was playing well earlier in the year, That's Kellen Moore is offense. So what is he doing over there that he brings Emily brought in all these coaches? Guys he had in Green Bay 10 years ago. Mike Nolan, who hired him 20 years ago. It's just this. This cronyism tied coaching staff. And you wonder, and you wonder how much Jerry thought about like a mat rule. He mentioned Matt Rule one time last December, just after Baylor played in the Big 12 championship game. What a great young coach to thought. Matt Rhule wass. And you're Matt Rhule took over a team that was just God awful and got ready Cam Newton, and they released whatever they are three and four. They compete. Uh, yeah. I mean, I don't know. I don't know that he wouldn't like to rethink this lot. Now it's the first year so I think both the pandemic the DAC injury, the offensive line being completely wiped out. Those going allow the coaches to skate for year. But he has to be thinking this. This may have been a Terrible higher. The Cowboys buyers or sellers at the trade deadline. You know, I don't think they have a lot to sell. I heard somebody saying trade one of their wide receivers. They don't need that many hundreds of it. That's the one thing they have is good wide receivers. You want to trade one of those go You know, Draft Ah, linebacker with a neck injury. That's what that's what excites you about rebuilding the team. I don't think they will do much. There's certainly not Myers, they get by. I mean, I don't know why in the world you would add. Do it to a terrible collection of talent as this many injuries, but I don't expect him to do a lot, actually.
If You Don't Adapt, You Die.
"Hi, everybody. Thanks for joining me today. The accelerate your business growth podcast is sponsored by audible DOT com. and. Because there is so much audible dot com that you may not even realize in addition to all the audiobooks we are offering you a trial. You can go to audible trial, DOT COM slash business growth sign up for that free trial and explore I think you will be amazed at what you find. Over. The years of this podcast has gained recognition as a great resource for a sales professionals, small business owners, business leaders of all kinds. and that is really because of the guests These are folks with expertise in particular areas of business. And they join me for conversation where they share that expertise with all of you that way you can get information that you need. You can get connected to these folks. and. You can implement strategies that help you and your business. Today is no exception. My guest today is Karen. Jenkins Karen is the president and CEO of R. J. Consulting a full service consulting firm providing companies and their employees with the skills and resources to become more committed to their performance empowered to effect change and be prepared for the journey ahead. With, over thirty years of Experience Karen is a recognized speaker author and leadership consultant equipping executives with the necessary tools to create results driven organizational change. Thanks so much for me today. Karen. Thank, you for the vacation I? AM WE HAVE TO BE HERE I am thrilled to have you here We are going to be spending time. really talking about Being open to change and and how you we have to be able to. shift and change and whatnot order to be successful and You know with everything we're going through and and all of the upheaval and. crisis and you know you name it that's been going on over the past. I don't know seven months. I would just I love your insights on how businesses survive. The business cycle during a crisis like the one we're experiencing. So. It's it's it's pendant of the business. So the reality you've had some businesses that have had minimal impact other than the having to transport for move from working in house on Office to tell were you've had some that were only other some that actually have flourished because they worry a needed commodity or service, and then you have others that unfortunately have suffered significantly because of the crisis. So it really depends on the business but. In any case, your business has to be established and set on a foundation that is agile and flexible enough to be able to shift or pitted depending on what the market brain. So of course, we all know about slot analysis. So strength weaknesses, opportunities and threats, and one of the threats that if you're really doing a true swot analysis. Is located at potential external factors that could negatively impact your your company and a lot of them. We don't think about right whoever gets. Years would've thought about Kobe coming in and then having the negative impact of his hand and for the duration of at his dad. worked. Challenges that we're faced with is and I can't say this to your listeners. This too shall pass the question is win. Because we face so many other challenges, but the differences and this particular challenges the other challenges we've had. Twenty two thousand when we had the nine eleven on two thousand and we have the economic meltdown and crisis. The thing was it happened you know we got through the week we got stopped or it happened, and then we were able to work on rebuilding in coming up with a plan to get to the recovery. This is is is that it's happened and here we are a month later it's still happening so. We'll get through. It is just a matter of time. So what we have to do is we have to recognize that for every door and window that closes there's seventeen others that open right. So the needs of our community, the needs of our clients may change based on what's happened. So in some instances, businesses that had a lot of very well thriving company where customers wanted. X., after this, they may not need X. or maybe they don't need X. Right now because the Kobe still going on but then you have to ask you a question, what do they need and if it's not particular customers, maybe it's another set of customers that I never thought about. So what am I have to Kinda scan the environment I have to keep my eyes and ears. To the needs and then figure out from our company's perspective. What can we? What can we feel? What need can we fulfill than is out there now that may not have been there before.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Slash dad tire, check them out and see what they have going on over there. My wife and I we just we deleted a our social media accounts. It's weird because I have to still post. I have to use probably the wrong word. A big part of running a ministry online is being active online. So I will. I will I don't know if our listeners know this, but I'll. I'll literally download instagram post something on there. For the DAD tired audience and delete my instagram I do that a couple times a week and Even when I'm on, do that for a minute I it's it's funny how when you kind of get out of that Matrix, you're able to look at it from a different angle, but anyway, we just so we deleted all the and a lot of our news comes from social media. I don't know what's going on unless I'm you know somebody's talking about on social media? and. One thing that I've noticed here. Sorry for my add rant here I'm thinking through a lot of. A lot of loud but one thing I noticed was. I can become highly cynical of people. Just like culture at large, and then you you jump on facebook or instagram whatever. And you read all these people's opinions especially in a time like right now we've got major crises around the world and a political elections and all this stuff. So you hear everyone's opinion and I just started getting real real cynical. and. What's fascinating is Sorry. I'M GONNA keep processing loud here you're gonNA sorry. So. So the groups that were part of is like a local like on facebook is a local, our neighborhood group are our our town group right? Just what's what's going on in our local town? We live in a small town. So, when I read that I'm like super cynical. I'm like man these people are XYZ right. But when when you delete that and not now I'm just interacting with my actual neighbor and I'm going to the grocery store. It's so amazing how different I view actual people When I'm not processing through the filter of social media, Dino those a long tangent that was processing all that. Really. It's a really good story. You shall know them by their fruit. Yeah. And the research is overwhelming now. That the rising rates of anxiety and depression together with envy. In a one to one core correspondence one to one. With. How much social media you consent? So there it is folks like you know the thing about some of some of the pieces were talking about right now like news intake media, social media, these are actually lifestyle choices. The good news is if you know you're not a concentration count, they're not forcing you. You can choose to go you know.
Conversation With Alexandra Daddario
"Wwl Mario Lopez joining me now on. Zoom. Alexandra daddario welcome to the show. I. Thank you. Thanks for taking the time. Best last name ever real last name, right I can't imagine. Say the Dario what did they call you growing up over the nicknames? The Dario guys call me that. Data Rio data. I love data real permission please. So, today is national. Make A dog's Day. We discussed the other day dogs about ten holidays throughout the year, which is awesome and you know what they deserve to have their day made I. Know you've teamed up with some awesome people to celebrate. So what are you doing? So Subaru is they worked with dogs for over twenty years. They there he were the sec a came up with this great idea. Last year to do super loves pets month in October which encourages people to go out and. Adopt a dog and adopted underdog, which is a special needs dog or dog older that kind of thing. And they have a special day within October October. Twenty seconds today where you can Hashtag make a dog's day and show yourself doing something good for a dog either. Or volunteering or adopting a dog or encouraging others to. And Anchorage everyone to do that? And you know Subaru has really sort of wants to push this this out to make sure that people know that adopting a great thing to do and they're also donating one hundred dollars for being adopted dog. To shelters and that kind of thing and I just encourage everyone to do it because I love my shelter dog leave and you know he's so near and dear to my heart I can't imagine you know I get so sad thinking about him in the shelter and I know everyone who adopts the dog feels the same way we are big dog lovers over here I've got two dogs. Myself One who's got a little physical special need come to find out. But so we love him even more. It's funny because I feel like dogs really know they're getting adopted and you can you they show appreciate it. Could totally tell you can totally tell and they're so grateful. So it is a great feeling. On way run. Shelter dogs are. They definitely, and they're just. I can't tell you how much my dad's brought Malay. So I urge everyone to good for you on a dog go for it. Good for you. Now I see your dogs all over what's the secret to get them to pose for the camera. Tree. We have the same award system. Take care of me that's how we get married but actually. Street right next Hamra. And then you know you get consid-. WON'T LISTEN TO BE ON THE RETREAT MY hands same. I'm on. That program. You got a new movie out on demand a loss girls and love hotels. Cool. Title it. It looks like a thriller. What's it about? Yeah. It's about a girl who goes to Japan and she alost girl she's a little lost in your life and she gets into all kinds of trouble and falls in love and drinks too much. Not kind of thing. It's a really beautiful movie. We shot it in Tokyo and Gorgeous. So Warm. Very cool for sure. Also the voice of Lois Lane for the animated film Man. Of Tomorrow, you're you're super you've been superman. Fan I used to watch lows in park, the Dean Cain, very hatch shell growing up. I Love Superman. I was always wanted to date mems the that now your lowest lane and you're literally doing. Fun. Also in the works, the movie songbird this was one of the only films being made at the height of the pandemic. How'd that go for him? Great is the first job Bach. Is My first time working this year so definitely weird to shoot during this period of time, but they were real everyone's been works a couple projects and. You, know it's very, very strict. Everyone wears maths lot of testing and I'm really really out of. Industry for getting back to the can safely at and And I think it's really cool movie. Shoot. Los Angeles actually shot here in L. A.. Okay. Very. Cool. Very good. Fishing, too. So. What did you catch anything that day? I. Grew back. Through back where we fishing? Sorry where we fishing listening in Long Island sound I was over with them in Connecticut bad. Our knew how to fish and I've never been fishing reports. So I went and fishing for fun. Right I just went to visit I love fish. I mean, it's relaxing for Chilean maybe having a draining. I thought it was boring but it's it's not at all because you're on a boat and it's beautiful. Exactly Fun Yeah it's golf you're hanging out. It's nice. It's pretty. Off But I imagine it's the same legal. Before. Let you go I. WanNa put you on the spot. Quick questions. Quick answers. Okay. Favourite TV or movie dog. The. Golden retriever from home rebounds. K.. Favored. Show you binge during quarantine. Too Hot to handle. Which one is that one? That's the one where they all have to go to an I not allowed cheats. Reality yes. Yes to hot. Okay. What's your? What's your go to Karaoke jam? Bohemian rhapsody. Is a commitment or they're also all time favorite. Halloween costume. How God I'd never I never does not rally. I now I'm always dressed just a wish I mean I, I should. Actually be more than just putting just like. You see I have more fun at Halloween as an adult I. think that I did as a kid getting out the and everything. Yeah I'm all fired up Obama Alpha this year. My. Motto Halloween and I'm just I. Don't know what that's about. Not Halloween Person. I mean I like I like handing out candy. But I've never been someone to like get super just. Daddy Rio. All. Right. Very cool. Congratulations on everything and thank you so much for taking the time to visit with US ON MARCH DOT COM for all the Info about make a day Alex checking-in. Thank
Top 10 Haunted Crime Scenes
"Starting off our list of haunted crime scenes is the Eden Brown estate on the Caribbean island of Nevis. There're couple versions of this story and they all take place before a wedding. Of course, they do essentially the groom and the best man they get into a fight they pull out their vessels and they kill each other. Oh but they're not the ghosts of the Brown. Estate that would be the bride who still roams the estate and a long white gown waiting for her wedding day. Of course, she is the. Are. They're always brides dressed in their wedding clothes just waiting for their wedding day at these places and it's always really sad because i. they're also always like crying or like they look very like shock they've always been jilted. Yeah. It's not fair. No I. Don't like while in eighteen, twenty, two, this bride Julia. Huggins was set to marry Walter Maynard, his best dude John Huggins was going to be the best man but all was not well of course, there wasn't everyone died. Wheeler Alina a fight was a bruin. So there's like multiple stories about what actually happened and since the story was largely spread by tourism, they all vary a little bit. I feel like the best things in the worst things are always spread by doors. One hundred percent we can account for a lot with tourism well, like I said, there's a few theories. The first is that the grew was having an affair and the best man found out that was his sister. So he was like I'm upset and then the groom was like you are Eliah I think that was it that was it, but there's also some mortgage bonds. Okay. The next one is that the best man like I said was the bride's brother and the groom discovered that they were hooking up with each other on the low, and obviously he went a little bananas about that Allah incest a lot incest. So S- big ill. Another theory we've got another one says that the bride's father now, that's the dad this time was tried for mistreating his sleeves and this was in the eighteen hundred. So you know that was real bad. That was a sharp left turn sharp left. The groom having an affair. Yeah. That's like the classic in the best man is being a good dude and killed them died hero. It's a pretty good wrong com movie actually I picked up I like that one while historians think the real story dates back to a historical rivalry between the maynard and the huggins families the plantation itself dates back to the Century and it was at that time a beautiful property decorated with international furnishings from Africa and China. But today it's in ruins. Really. Sad. But sad torres claim to hear whales of a crying bride enslaves. ooh, and Julia is sometimes spotted in her wedding gown only during the full moon I don't hate that this is in ruin. Now what's meant to be will be yeah don't go there. It's terrible place. Nine. At number nine this week is leap castle and love this one according to ancient legends. Leap Castle is built on an ancient Druid holy site. ooh while we don't know if the druids used the land for human sacrifice, we do know that once the castle was built it did witness hundreds of murders I feel like that's just like what castles do. Yeah. Any good castle worth. Its name seen offend learning the hundreds of murders. You can't be a castle. You know it's a qualification. The best part of this place is that it's named after a little earl leap off a nearby cliff by an ancient Irish abandoned chieftain. ooh. Yeah. He jumped as a sign of bravery to win clan leadership from his brother later, it was taken over by the bloody carols. I want to be friends with them because you definitely don't want to be their enemy. Yeah. You don't want to be an enemy of the bloody. Oh Carols No. Well, they were known for throwing Red Wedding s dinner parties and just straight up killing their guests like the saddest episode of Game Fern. So to picture that was all is affecting me R.I.P Robb stark. Talk. About number be over it. Well, this was way back in the fifteen hundreds. So the it is pretty game of thrones Ian. Yeah. So the carols, this is one of my favorite things they built an uber yet a what an yet. and. What would happen was victims would fall through a trap door into this. googly. It in the remains of one hundred fifty people were found during a nineteen twenties renovation. So I think we have three major ghosts that we want to chat about really quick. Hit me up. One of the ghosts is called the Red Lady. It's an carol hostage, the murdered her baby. Oh, I don't WanNa be a part of them anymore. This is when I got off the OH. Carol, Bandwagon. You're. Not. In. She's looking for her baby though was murdered. Oh, I know and then we have thaddeus. So Carol who is a priest killed buys brother in a power grab anybody named Thaddeus as okay in my book thought he is a great name does the last one that I found was called the murdered lady was she murdered? No. We. Think she was I wouldn't Wanna be called the murdered lady later in life she shows up and she's naked has all yeah. Has a red cloth over her face and she just screams twice at you and then leaves that would change you as a person I think like to which say I leave I leave the Milky Way Galaxy. If that happened to me I would walk like five hundred miles and then I'd walk five hundred more which I would be so far. That's terrifying to me. No. Thanks. So we don't love that will in the sixteen hundreds after all that crazy. Oh, Carol business it changed hands and it went to Jonathan Darby who fell in love with an old carol daughter. So now it was just all about love right romance. Well, he still haunts the castle right now people as looking for his loss golds, but I think that's pretty priority of him. The other reports of things happening are doorbells ring with no one their tools move around without being touched There's like sounds of furniture moving people screaming, and then a carpenter that was working on the property once just left and he was like I'm never coming back to work because he walked five hundred miles and then five hundred more leap castle everybody.
Why is it so Hard to Lose Weight?
"It is hard to believe, but this begins our seventeenth year of broadcasting, dishing up nutrition. For seventeen years every Saturday or most Saturdays I guess I should say. We have shared up to date nutritional information. Designed specifically to make a difference in the lives of our listeners and their health. So, each week our message has been about eating real food like that's the term. Now I think that we can kind of put our stamp on his eating real. So, that our listeners our clients can have more energy. Less, than for inflammation, better health and everything in between. So it isn't a message about the latest fad diet. It's about eating a healing plan of real food. This is just kind of an interesting observation and Clint Brittany. Maybe you've noticed this in clinic here in there but I've noticed with some of my clients at it seems that many people seem to like blame or really attribute many of their health problems to their genetics. Yes. I, agree with that Yup. And they haven't quite made that connection yet that food the food that they're eating is the cause of their health problems. So as Dietitians we work one on one with clients, and so we'll hear things like my father had diabetes. So I know sooner or later I will probably have that to or maybe it's my mom had arthritis so I will have it eventually also. one. They heard I think recently in the last week or two My grandmother had Alzheimer's disease. So I really worry that I also get Alzheimer's disease. And it is important to know our family history. What is in our family history? I mean, we even have this in our health questionnaire, an area where people can kind of talk through or list out what's in their family. But, it's also an important an important concept I think to say, the family history does not have to become our destiny. And we can be like, maybe we have some predispositions in the background or tendencies one way or another, but it does not have to be our destiny. So true and I think that what oftentimes people don't think about is you know maybe your dad had something your mom had something. And now you do what? About your lifestyle? No, you probably have a similar lifestyle. You know a lot of our habits come from childhood, and so I think often times it is more lifestyle and your food choices driving. Those conditions than than genetics yup absolutely I'll say that to my clients do it's like you know we probably especially as younger children ate a lot of the same things growing up as our parents did. So how much of an impact did the foods that we were all eating together then have on the development of some of these conditions it's kind of food for thought. That A lot. and so for you listeners out there maybe you've also said to yourself, you know I must come from a family there must be an obesity gene there because my dad was overweight his mom was overweight all of my brothers and sisters are overweight and now I'm starting to gain weight so it just must be baked into our destiny must be in our jeans. Though the question, we are going to address this morning on the show is, why is it so hard for many people to lose weight they're going to go through a couple of things per pretty much two main points that will address throughout this show. And maybe maybe you is a listener of this is something that you've wondered yourself and maybe you've said yourself, well, why can all my friends lose weight just by drinking less wine or less soda or less XYZ while I can't lose weight and I never even drink wine to begin with it's just not fair. Yeah we hear that time Yup. So. So this is these are the kinds of things we want to explore in today's show, and before we dive deeper into our topic, I want to introduce myself and my co host WHO's here in studio with me. My name is Leah Klein showed I'm registered and licensed Dietitian, and here with me this morning is Brittany Vincent who is also a registered and licensed Dietitian. And today, our goal is to share some new information but also some old information about weight loss and our hope is that you will really think about the information we're going to share with you about weight loss and perhaps then be able to take some that information and start. feeling out in applying in your own life where it makes sense for you and applying this to your own body. As we all know, it's one thing to know the information, which is what our show is about a lot of times you want to give that information out and make it as widespread as possible. But then it is a whole other thing to actually apply it and to do it and. Teaching choices are hard especially like you said of these are things that have come from our childhood. These are habits that have been deeply in green, and oftentimes this is the hardest part for people.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"So they go and they come up with beautiful things. What's your wife's truth? She also came from the the Soviet Union world, but but her story is a little different in a way because she sounds and she's as American as apple pie. I mean she grew up in a small town in Ohio and but she was her mom her parents did back then in the eighty-nine. They were moving through Italy. They were one of the first people to leave this this was during the time when it was still wage in this country when they were moving and so she was born in Italy as they were on the way to America so they had to make a pit stop in Italy and because she was a baby that wouldn't let her back on the airplane. And so she had to wait six months. I think before they would be able to move to United States. So she was six months when she came here to the States, but she still speaks Russian Ukrainian, so it worked out her story. I mean she comes the same thing persecuted. Parents just there's I in fact I got a camera. I'm going to this week or next week. I'm going to going to have record her dad cuz every time I come over for dinner he shares stuff like how how Christians were perfect. How the Bolsheviks took over the same what kind of strategies do you use fear tactics and thinking it's just like the stories. He tells me just wow, they're powerfulest. I was like, want to make sure I capture them on on video so that way my kids when they grow up your oldest or the huge. It could be a movie just from all the stories told me. I'm sure man what when you were a kid, like, what was your thoughts about the future? I did you think about the future did you I mean were you like stuck in the did you have like dreams of things you wanted to do or like what I mean.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"If you've been part of the data. Audience for any amount of time, you've probably heard me talk about how this whole thing started out of a really crappy season of my own marriage personally, and I've talked about this in the DAD tired book I've shared about it on many podcasts and but. There was a season where Leyland I were just this really really crappy season. I don't know how else to describe it It really wasn't her it was me if I'm totally honest like I just I sucked as a husband and dad I was really dealing with a bunch of identity stuff and my own just like personal stuff and I was blown away from my family. I was pulling away from my kids and I. Just I was a I sucked as a husband dad man I don't know how else to say it. It was really terrible and we were in just a really bad spot A. Marriage and there was a particular day in I know of shared the story in the book and the podcast. But on bear with me here I, there was a particular day where we were in another fight and I had said something on purpose to hurt her in just my complete immaturity as a husband and so I remember it. So vividly man we were standing in our bedroom and I said something to hurt her on purpose and she started to get tears in her eyes and in my stupidity I thought to myself literally, like I'm winning the argument like I'm I'm up is just so dumb. And Anyway. She's got tears in her eyes she and she's just staring at me and I'll never forget the way she looked at me. She's never looked at me like that before or sense and. It was very just heavy heavy moment and she looked she paused and she said jared I just want you to know I've been waking up at two in the morning every morning I set my alarm to go off and I wake up and go into living room and I pray that God would capture your heart again and always said man like I would have rather she custom me..
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Burn off this little gut that I've got going to take care of this dad and I know this is something that you guys talk about all the time and something that you guys are concerned about as well because they see it in. There are closed data at facebook group. If you're not part of that group got about twelve thousand guys from all over the world or part of that group and oftentimes guys who post in there and say man, it's time for me to step up. I'm ready to get rid of his dad bod`ed, what do you guys suggest, and those are some of the most commented on Post that happened in the DAD tired group. You'll see hundreds of comments on their of really cool stories of like before, and after of guys who kind of lost track of their fitness and they just got things got out of hand and they got totally out of shape and then they decided they were gonNA, figure it out, and so they'll post before and after picture, and then all the guys will comment on their like dude, what you do or is it key? Does Paleo did you fast for three years? What do you got going on there, teach me your ways and it really is One of our most responded to post that happened in the data group is guys who are trying to get back in shape and looking for advice and ways to do that. So I know this is something that you guys talk about. So this has been the this has been what I've been focused on this week, and this is what have been This is my new thing. If you know me, I get into different things pretty much every week. And this week I'm focused on just men. How do I get back in shape at all start eating healthier being more disciplined, and as I do that one of the first questions I always try to ask myself as someone who's trained. My best to follow Jesus in the ways of Jesus is I was just asked like does God care about this does God's word have anything to say about this? Does he care?.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Trying to think what is the thing that I hope that guys who are listening get out of this and the first couple of things I would love to hear what you think, but first couple of things that come to mind number one is I hope guys can hear to Christians who are coming through this at a different angle? Just lovingly have these kind of conversations because I think they're so healthy and I think they're really unhealthy. doing them on the Internet where people are just kind of yelling at each other all the time. So that's the first thing I would say just having Christians being able to have these conversations in a loving way I think that the we it's important for Christians to be to to wrestle through this stuff and to do with love in like to say and I want we both want. Follow Jesus here I love that analogy gave at the beginning. We're. We're not on opposite sides. We're on the same hill, looking at Jesus trying to figure out our Jesus. What wisdom would you give it to us? And then the second thing is these are the kind of I think this should be the posture of the way that we have conversations with our kids on what I'm afraid of is, if we give our kids really definitive, black and white answers, this is what you should do then when they go out into the real world, and they have people who kind of test that or who have different perspective I frankly, that's where a lot of young people end up leaving the church like Oh, I, didn't even you know. My Mom and dad must be really old school and I'm GonNa. Listen to what they say anymore and so I think just being able to like process these. Obviously our kids are for some of US have young kids. Your kids are getting too into their teenage years old young adults, and so, but just to be able to like. Sit Down and have these like really. Let's wrestle through the scriptures. What does the Bible? Say What do other people's that we love? Say like what would our gay friends say? What would our? What would our Jesus loving friends say and like just? Just wrestle through all of that together I. Think it's just really really good model to set up for them, but anyway I guess that's kind of the things that I hope that. People who are listening to get out of it. Is there anything from your perspective like this is what I hope. A listener gets out of this. Yeah. I, think I need a really good I love the idea of as Christians we, we can work together work on the same team like we we we have to learn to like love each other enough like this liberal, rightly loving people, so let's do that to our brothers and sisters in Christ and like we don't have to die on all these hills. Linked to to get our.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"On that data dot com number one is the community tab in that will link over to a close group that we have on facebook. We got about twelve thousand guys from all over the world. Who are taking this stuff seriously, so come hang out with us over there, and then we also have a free book so if you go to death her dot com slash. Slash Free Book. It's ten practical ways that you can start leading your family. Jesus today it's a short read and very practical way for you to get started and spiritual leadership as of like today, so that's a great way to start today. We're going to pick up on some of the topics that we're talking about last week if he didn't listen to last week's. which was titled Something to the effect of you can't lead where you haven't been around that If you haven't listened to that already, I highly recommend that you go back and listen to that one first and then today's episode might be helpful as kind of a follow up to that It's actually a message that I gave a couple years ago. Ago at a church as a guest speaker on, but I just think ties in really well, too with with what we were talking about last week. So I think that's GonNa. Be Helpful for you today. again as a follow up to to what we're talking about last week before we dive into that though I. Do want to thank my friends over at. At blinking for sponsoring today's episode, I love Lincoln's. It's one of the most used APPs on my phone. You can hear my baby going in the background, which is a good tie for me and talking about blink. We have very little time for us to actually sit down and quite into. Read a book I know. Very few of us can find the time. Time to do that without all the screaming and chaos, and so two like to finish a book as a young Dad, who's trying to be husband, a dad and work, and all the savages? It feels impossible. I used to read a lot before I had kids now i. hardly ever read, and that's why I love links. What they do is they condense? Thousands of nonfiction books, fifteen minutes, or less that you can either read or listen to you. I like to listen to a few books before I go to bed at night. They even now have a full audio books..
"dad" Discussed on Bad To The Dad
"Able to see. Performing actually room. They get their all with thinking so selflessly. So we can rest assured that we can have all. Every When we're in the dark, they shiny line on you. When we're in the dark nation, light on you. Were Bad to the dad with coach, Randy and Adam De. We really hope you're enjoying our musical spectacular in honor of Dad Data Palooza a musical celebration of Dad's first time. We've ever done kind of a concert. He type of program here concert type of special of we're glad you. The listener are a part of it. You'RE GONNA WANNA stay to the very end. Of this bad to the DAD special as pledge said, the very was, it was sun was so sudden. She's been. She's been sick for weeks. The very which he actually died was very sudden, so were applying that same fletch methodology to the podcast. You WanNa. Wait to the very end of our our program here because coach. We've got a another special bonus song from Harry. Cars are bad to the dead with coach. Randy and Adam de this is our musical celebration.
"dad" Discussed on Dad So Hard
"Always challenged to come up with names. What do you think we do for the title of a book? Just all the titles of the episodes mashed onto the cover. That would be amazing. It's also a book with those that would be a me that that could be Listen you people out there. Listening. Tell us. Twenty twenty five page long title. To help us at type it. Accepting. Who Listen Father's Day is a week away. Everybody who, if we did not mention why your dad or why? You were great on this podcast episode Danny can people aren't day if they disagree with US 'cause I'm sure also maybe people think we about MOM's. Different podcast. This is DAD's. With. Wait till next May, or if we miss something, tell us how Danny. How would these people tell us if we miss them instagram facebook at that so hard podcast twitter at or pod. Email. DOTS on podcast at gmail.com website. We Are Dad's hard dot com I. Mean if you Google Dad so hard. One of our names come find us, but please guys let us Lee or girls or men, women or anyone ever you identify, we do not care how identify yourself is on you identify and tell us work great. Owns your fan. We take just. Just listen and tell us that we're great and. We'll give it right back and we'll be. We may a t shirt. Dan Did you notice what I'm wearing today I'm thrown about the old school the throwback. Again Watch on Youtube. These shirts are no longer available. These are sold out except for extra charges but we still have our red ones high stock red red last. Right onto the best if you need more. Do you need more. Do you have any you should? I gave you a bag. Downtown I have a ton. But, if you need sure, let us know and listen celebrate your father's weekend. Everybody tell them call them if they were to grave. Pray to them and say prayer Like, look to the heavens. Don't have a dad. Celebrate your mother on Father's Day long yet one. Or, walk to your neighbor, and say Abbey Father's Day, but if you just have a mom celebrating. Listen I know a bunch of I. WanNa Single Mom friends in the neighborhood in the town I, I'm fully supporting their kids. Your mom happy father's Day because she's doing a both. And we are absolutely unity community. Enjoy it, everybody Danny. What else would you want to tell people? Your words of wisdom going to father's Day weekend. Let Your Dad Relax. It's been a rough quarantine. Step it up malone and don't yell. So share that little bit with your kids. And then we will be back. We'll be. We'll be back next week and we'll you know. How are we've survive father's Day battle recap. What we cap it all to you. Okay? We love you guys..
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Jesus turns around after Peter had just an item, and they looked in the eye in that word, there is play Poe again. Just like when they first met, it was deep soul, the soul connection, almost as Jesus was looking into Peter Soul when he was denying him really really powerful stuff, but I just imagined. Do that Jesus like he looked at people? Now is a lot like that. That's the kind of person. I imagined Jesus was like when you were with him. He's constantly. Entering into that EM- Belay Poe where he's like. In deep into your eyes and he's beyond just seeing the outside of you. He's like looking inside of you like he senior soul, and who you are, and he's he's giving you as full attention at the deepest level like this is the kind of God that we serve what we don't see Jesus, doing is like overlooking people as he's trying to save people. Could you imagine that like Jesus? His whole point of coming to Earth was that he would save humans from sin that he would rescue them that he would invite them into a new kingdom. Kingdom into the way things were meant to be and supposed to be and so Jesus when he was interacting with people. He like gave them his full attention. You don't see him looking over people to try to accomplish his mission. What you don't see Jesus, saying like Hey, can you just like? Can you hurry up with the story, or can you hurry? Hurry hurry like. Can you just get to the point here? Because I got I'm going to try to save people. Jesus knew that the person right in front of him was part of the mission. Like. This is the mission. He came to save people, and now he's looking the people that he came to save right in the is. He didn't hurry past them. He didn't tell them. Get on with your story or get to the point, or I don't have time for that right now. Because I'm trying to do something bigger. No, he knew that like the person right in front of me. That is the mission. This is what I came here for that person in for. For All people whoever is right in front of me has my attention. They have my love. They have everything that I have to give them. He was fully present when he was present. And our mission as men is right in front of us. It's not work. Our mission is in our hobbies or the way that we can scale up on the social ladder or the way that we can accomplish more work or get more things done. It's not filling up the bank account. Like, our mission are the little humans under our care that we have the honor and the privilege of disciple. This is our mission. We don't get to say. Hurry up, get to the point. You're in the way. They are what we're here for. Our goal now listen hear me clearly our worlds are not supposed to revolve around our kids. That's an unhealthy relationship, but I think you know what I'm saying like I'm not saying that. But what I m saying is there's really what more thing. What could be more important in your life the to give your full attention to your children into your wife to your family, what could be more important than being fully present with the people that got us put right in front of you? What other relationship! What other thing is worth chasing after the to give your kids and your wife? Your full attention to be fully present while being present. We're GONNA. Talk about what it looks like to be president while being present, but before we do I want to thank my friends over at blinking for sponsoring today's episode. I love blinking there. One of my favorite I use on my phone constantly We're always trying to learn as guys in. It's really hard as busy dads to continue to find the time to. To. Sit Down and learn something which is why I love them. Because what they do is, they take three thousand over three thousand nonfiction bestsellers. They've got over twenty seven different categories, and they convinced them down into what they call blinks, which are just fifteen minutes or less that you can either read a book or listen to a book and really get the main. Main need to know information from thousands of books so again. If you don't have time to sit down and read a whole book or listen to a whole book, it will take fifteen minutes of best the need to know information. Really condense it down to give you the information that you need for it what they also have now. They've also just launched A. A brand new feature, or you can listen to full length audio books and exclusive podcast. That's brand new feature that they've just launched on. They're really excited to try that out. I think you guys are GonNa. Love that as well as podcast listeners. I like to listen to a couple of books every night before I go to bed, just continue to learn and. Gain more knowledge and short amount of time to books that I recommend that they have on there. They've got one on there for tire. Dad's called why we sleep by Matthew Walker It's a great book to check out just about sleep. And then they also got the ruthless elimination of hurry by John Mark Homer, which is one of my favorite books of two thousand twenty right now. Blankets has a special offer just for. For you are dead, tired audience, go to blink DOT, com slash tired to start your free seven-day trial and get twenty five percents off blinking premium membership and up to sixty five percent of audiobooks that you get to keep forever. That's bleakest spelled. B. L. I. N.. K. I S. T. BLINKING DOT COM slash tired to get twenty five percent off a premium membership and a seven day free trial. That's blink dot com forward slash tired. Here's one of my biggest fears for says Dad's. One of my biggest fears is that we're going to run past. Our kids in an effort to chase down a better life for them. I, mean just say that one more time because I wanted to soak in one of my biggest fears for us as dad's as that, we will run past our kids in an effort to chase down a better life for them. A Leyland. We'd just bought a new home and we've been trying for almost our entire marriage to save up and to get ourselves in a position where we could buy a house and we were renting for pretty much the entire time our kids have been alive, and and then we moved into a little town home kind of in the interim, and then we just we saved up and we worked hard, and we finally got in this home. Home that we love and it's it's great for our little family, and it's got a yard which we wanted and which it's Kinda hard to find him Portland like something. That has an a yard where the kids can play. It was just amazing, and our kids loved it like we we. We had been talking about this for years, and we finally got into a home and our kids that they really loved it for about three days. and there was this moment like three days into this house when and just kind of like the newness wore off, and my son Said Daddy. Will you play in the backyard with me and And when he said that I just thought man like this house means absolutely nothing. If Daddy isn't present and the house like sure that you know the, they're happy to have a room to sleep in the happy have A. A yard to play in and whatever, but like they're not gonNa grow old and think man I really love that house. Even though my daddy was never physically or mentally around like my dad, you know. He got us a house and that's really all we wanted in life. Do we all know that right and I? Guess? I can just subconsciously Kinda. Thought like if I get my kids a house that they love you know. Know we'll be set and the truth is. They don't care like they don't. They're not any more happy in this house than they were in this tiny little town home that we just came from our home, the small house we were renting before they just don't care. It means nothing to them. If Daddy's not present what they'll look back on is not the house they lived in, but with a look back on was daddy. Daddy, present and I guess what was.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Of the Gospel says that Jesus turns around after Peter had just an item, and they looked in the eye in that word, there is play Poe again. Just like when they first met, it was deep soul, the soul connection, almost as Jesus was looking into Peter Soul when he was denying him really really powerful stuff, but I just imagined. Do that Jesus like he looked at people? Now is a lot like that. That's the kind of person. I imagined Jesus was like when you were with him. He's constantly. Entering into that EM- Belay Poe where he's like. In deep into your eyes and he's beyond just seeing the outside of you. He's like looking inside of you like he senior soul, and who you are, and he's he's giving you as full attention at the deepest level like this is the kind of God that we serve what we don't see Jesus, doing is like overlooking people as he's trying to save people. Could you imagine that like Jesus? His whole point of coming to Earth was that he would save humans from sin that he would rescue them that he would invite them into a new kingdom. Kingdom into the way things were meant to be and supposed to be and so Jesus when he was interacting with people. He like gave them his full attention. You don't see him looking over people to try to accomplish his mission. What you don't see Jesus, saying like Hey, can you just like? Can you hurry up with the story, or can you hurry? Hurry hurry like. Can you just get to the point here? Because I got I'm going to try to save people. Jesus knew that the person right in front of him was part of the mission. Like. This is the mission. He came to save people, and now he's looking the people that he came to save right in the is. He didn't hurry past them. He didn't tell them. Get on with your story or get to the point, or I don't have time for that right now. Because I'm trying to do something bigger. No, he knew that like the person right in front of me. That is the mission. This is what I came here for that person in for. For All people whoever is right in front of me has my attention. They have my love. They have everything that I have to give them. He was fully present when he was present. And our mission as men is right in front of us. It's not work. Our mission is in our hobbies or the way that we can scale up on the social ladder or the way that we can accomplish more work or get more things done. It's not filling up the bank account. Like, our mission are the little humans under our care that we have the honor and the privilege of disciple. This is our mission. We don't get to say. Hurry up, get to the point. You're in the way. They are what we're here for. Our goal now listen hear me clearly our worlds are not supposed to revolve around our kids. That's an unhealthy relationship, but I think you know what I'm saying like I'm not saying that. But what I m saying is there's really what more thing. What could be more important in your life the to give your full attention to your children into your wife to your family, what could be more important than being fully present with the people that got us put right in front of you? What other relationship! What other thing is worth chasing after the to give your kids and your wife? Your full attention to be fully present while being present. We're GONNA. Talk about what it looks like to be president while being present, but before we do I want to thank my friends over at blinking for sponsoring today's episode. I love blinking there. One of my favorite I use on my phone constantly We're always trying to learn as guys in. It's really hard as busy dads to continue to find the time to. To. Sit Down and learn something which is why I love them. Because what they do is, they take three thousand over three thousand nonfiction bestsellers. They've got over twenty seven different categories, and they convinced them down into what they call blinks, which are just fifteen minutes or less that you can either read a book or listen to a book and really get the main. Main need to know information from thousands of books so again. If you don't have time to sit down and read a whole book or listen to a whole book, it will take fifteen minutes of best the need to know information. Really condense it down to give you the information that you need for it what they also have now. They've also just launched A. A brand new feature, or you can listen to full length audio books and exclusive podcast. That's brand new feature that they've just launched on. They're really excited to try that out. I think you guys are GonNa. Love that as well as podcast listeners. I like to listen to a couple of books every night before I go to bed, just continue to learn and. Gain more knowledge and short amount of time to books that I recommend that they have on there. They've got one on there for tire. Dad's called why we sleep by Matthew Walker It's a great book to check out just about sleep. And then they also got the ruthless elimination of hurry by John Mark Homer, which is one of my favorite books of two thousand twenty right now. Blankets has a special offer just for. For you are dead, tired audience, go to blink DOT, com slash tired to start your free seven-day trial and get twenty five percents off blinking premium membership and up to sixty five percent of audiobooks that you get to keep forever. That's bleakest spelled. B. L. I. N.. K. I S. T. BLINKING DOT COM slash tired to get twenty five percent off a premium membership and a seven day free trial. That's blink dot com forward slash tired. Here's one of my biggest fears for says Dad's. One of my biggest fears is that we're going to run past. Our kids in an effort to chase down a better life for them. I, mean just say that one more time because I wanted to soak in one of my biggest fears for us as dad's as that, we will run past our kids in an effort to chase down a better life for them. A Leyland. We'd just bought a new home and we've been trying for almost our entire marriage to save up and to get ourselves in a position where we could buy a house and we were renting for pretty much the entire time our kids have been alive, and and then we moved into a little town home kind of in the interim, and then we just we saved up and we worked hard, and we finally got in this home. Home that we love and it's it's great for our little family, and it's got a yard which we wanted and which it's Kinda hard to find him Portland like something. That has an a yard where the kids can play. It was just amazing, and our kids loved it like we we. We had been talking about this for years, and we finally got into a home and our kids that they really loved it for about three days. and there was this moment like three days into this house when and just kind of like the newness wore off, and my son Said Daddy. Will you play in the backyard with me and And when he said that I just thought man like this house means absolutely nothing. If Daddy isn't present and the house like sure that you know the, they're happy to have a room to sleep in the happy have A. A yard to play in and whatever, but like they're not gonNa grow old and think man I really love that house. Even though my daddy was never physically or mentally around like my dad, you know. He got us a house and that's really all we wanted in life. Do we all know that right and I? Guess? I can just subconsciously Kinda. Thought like if I get my kids a house that they love you know. Know we'll be set and the truth is. They don't care like they don't. They're not any more happy in this house than they were in this tiny little town home that we just came from our home, the small house we were renting before they just don't care. It means nothing to them. If Daddy's not present what they'll look back on is not the house they lived in, but with a look back on was daddy. Daddy, present and I guess what was.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"All right guys. We'll welcome back. We have a bonus episode today. This is not a normal day that we would release an episode. And it's not a normal episode We are in the midst of a quarantine as you know. You're probably home with your kids listening to this. So I have a special guest. Somebody that's never been on our data show before may introduce to you for the very first time weighing in at sixty pounds soaking wet four foot. Three I have no idea what you are. My son allies yellows hate. But how are you how are you? I'm good let me just this microphone. Voice Don get areas. That's good heritage's me and Elijah Elijah and I I in Elijah the two of us. We should probably work on some grammar this week. we had this idea to since we've been stuck in the house. It's only been like three days and we're already at the top of our Getting a little antsy so we had this idea where we thought we would have. Families data hired families memorize scripture together. one verse a week for however many weeks were in this whole thing and And so Elijah tell them a little bit about how this whole thing is going to work. What's the first thing that people need to do? So the first thing you WanNa do is memorize What the verse. We're GONNA give you so. Let's tell them what verse. It is. What I do they memorized this week. Joshua one nine Joshua one nine They won't be able to see this because this is a podcast so they can't see us. Should we read it for him? So the verse Joshua One nine says have a now commanded. You be strong encourage courageous courageous. Do not be afraid. Do not discouraged for the Lord. Your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua one not. That's right okay. So that's the verse. We're GONNA work on this week again. It says I have not commanded. You be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged for the Lord. Your God will be with you wherever you go. Just real quick dude. What do you think that means? What do you think God was saying there? What does he wants to hear? Well I think it means that you shouldn't be afraid. Whatever you like run through and like I think God is always going to be with you so you don't have to worry and don't be afraid that's perfect. That's exactly what he's saying Is it kind of scary times? Some people kind of afraid right now with everything going on. Yes so it's it's it's easy to like watch the news and sometimes we watch the news and it's like Oh man that's kind of scary but we see God's say hey have I not commanded you be strong. Be Courageous courageous meets means have courage. Courage do not be afraid And do not be discouraged for the Lord. Your God will be with you wherever you go so we know even if we don't know what's ahead of us we know that God is always with okay. So that's the first thing we want everyone to memorize this verse. Verse will be memorizing together as a family this week. And then what's the second thing that they need to do? They need a Posted posted take video. And then what did take a video of your kid reading it. I mean memorizing it and You posted to dead tired kids so we created this group. We have a. We have a facebook group for normally for dad tire. Dad's but we created a dad. Tired Kids Group. So if you go to dad or if you go on facebook and you search dad tired kids and we'll put a link in the show notes here so you can click on that but you we've already got a bunch of people in this group already in their kids already started to work on this so if you're not in there yet jump in there. Today is Wednesday March Eighteenth So we'll have all week for the kids to take videos. And do you have a facebook now? I'll probably get grounded. Yeah if you ever get any kind of social media at all you will be grounded for life and if I did. I don't really know who I would have on facebook. I wouldn't really have anyone 'cause kids don't go to facebook and parents do but like I would just be going into facebook so it'd be kind of weird if you had to count and you're like adding people's parents 'cause you never know who's out there that's right that is exactly right so kids won't be able to probably don't have a facebook but we're going to ask the DADS to If you're listening to this take video of your kids only posted on the DAD tired kids group. It's a closed group for just the data listeners. And their kids but that way we can see all the other kids who are practicing this first together So upload the video of your child or children Sane this verse by memory and then And then what's the third thing that they need to do? What happens at the end of the week next week from now? What are we gonNA do when we look through? All these videos. I WanNa see the videos and we're GONNA see all the people who memorize the all the kids who memorized it and we're GONNA put all their names in This hat that and we're GONNA whoever gets picked out will be the winner and whoever's the winner will get a prize is it like while they win a new will we ship them Pencil No because they would not be happy with all the work they've done in basically something not could be that fun like putting all that work and you just want to Pencil So should we make huge like a house where they were in the house? No because they WANNA get to keep it for their selves. It's true and probably would be hard to ship a whole entire house just something smaller but like in between that kind of maybe a Lego set or something really fun. An art set or a Lego set. Boys girls anyone can enter into this and do this but we'll find a bunch of cool prizes and then we'll pick one winner every single week that we're all in this quarantine so again number one memorized. Joshua one nine we are using the NFC. Virgin you can use whatever version you'd like version Memorized Joshua one nine. Secondly go on the data kids facebook page and uplift upload The video of your child or children saying by memory can. Are they allowed to cheat? Like if you can have a bible behind the camera because if we saw the Bible behind the camera than knew for sure wouldn't get the price you got to memorize ak like do put in the work bro. So put in the work. Memorize it. You've got a week to do it. We recommend maybe doing a sentence a day and you should have it memorized. No problem and then Wednesday we will all these names and pick a name out and somebody will get to win a prize. We will go to the store before that. Pick out some really cool prizes ship. It out to you if shipping. If the post office is still open we will definitely get it out to you which we hope and believe that post offices will still be open all right. So that's your challenge for this week. Memorize averse as a family. Say By memory upload it and hopefully you get chose mic over. The Dad Tired Kids facebook group. Thanks for hanging out today..
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Proverbs twenty nine eighteen says this where there is no vision. The People Perish. That's the King James version. That says that where there is no vision. Jn The people perish. Let's proverbs twenty nine eighteen. which super interesting about that and really the question that we as DADS have to ask ourselves is what what is perishing in our families in in our life as a result of our lack of vision and our lack of leadership like the very first question that we have to ask ourselves? Is there something dying in me in my family in my kids in my marriage edge as a direct result of my lack of vision and leadership. Meaning I don't really know where I'm trying to take my family And so as a result result things are failing and is it a connection. Like with your wife. Do you feel like you're marriage is like falling apart. Listen here's the truth everything. Everything is either moving toward death or it's moving toward life. Those are two options. Nothing just stays the way it is. Everything is moving toward death or toward life and so you have to ask yourself like marriage. Moving toward life is becoming more good as the as the scripture say at remember after God created things he said. This is good. This is good. This is good and then as a result of evil and send things start to move away from life and toward evil and broken nece and so you ask yourself like his mind marriages moving toward good like the way God designed things to be the beauty of marriage it God designed it to be or is it moving towards death as it moving toward broken. This is your relationship with your kids moving towards lie for it's like this is good. Can you look at your relationship with your kids the way the God looked at creation and say this is good. This is the way it was designed to be or is it moving towards Baroque inness and death. You relationship with God himself is it good Do you look at it and say Manda God's kingdom come as will be done in my relationship with God like this is the way God designed it to be. It's really good and beautiful and healthy or is it moving. Torch's death your your rhythm. Are you able to sustain a rhythm. week-to-week day to day is is your rhythm of life good or is it moving lean toward death and broken this your health your emotions your your ability to have self control like his. Do you feel yourself growing immaturity maturity and growing and self control or you feel like that is moving toward death and two broken this because the truth is where there is lack of vision and things will start to perish. Things will die and some thenia dying around you as a result of our leadership and our lack of vision and so we have to ask ourselves. I just point blank as a man. What is dying in me and in my family as a result of my lack of vision and leadership? And here's is what I mean like. Do you know where you're trying to go personally. And do you know where you're trying to help your family to go like you have a very clear vision of where you want to leave your family because the truth is when we don't when there is no vision everyone panics. I always felt this most when I was coaching soccer at practice. When we're doing outdoor and we show show it show up and I was always trying to like kind of wing it and I didn't really have a plan and the kids are being crazy and they're running all around and my first reaction against to blame because it's just chaotic and really? I'm just like I realized there's no plan here. There's no vision. And so everything feels chaotic. And it feels out of control and then I start getting mad at everyone because things are chaotic. When really I showed up without a plan and I think the same is true for us with the fan with our families when we're trying to lead them towards something and things feel chaotic or I should say when we're not leading the swords every anything and things start to feel chaotic and the houses crazy and our rhythms are crazy and our our schedules are crazy? And you you feel like you're not connecting with your wife with your kids and everything just feels like chaos around you and our first reaction is to blame. Blame your boss blame your work. Blame your hours. Blame your wife. Blame your kids disobedience or whatever but really you didn't show up with a plan or within a vision and so what else would there be except chaos and again there's grace man like I know that there's there's some very real circumstances that contribute to all of our chaos. I got a letter out of nowhere that said. Hey we you're gonNA there's no cause of action you need to be out of your house. By December thirty I that was a result of my bad leadership is just life circumstances hit and I get that. There's there's grace for that but even in the midst we know Again not to beat the the sports analogy here. But there's going to be things that happen in a game they're outside of your control and you can't blame what you do is you say okay. This is this week. Expected acted things to happen and yet we still come in with the plan. And that's what we do. As part of leading our families is really start to ask ourselves. We know life is going to hit. We know there's going to be chaos. That's outside of our control but what came we control. And what do I need to own and when you do have vision when you actually know this is where we want to go as a family so you can actually rest a little bit easier. And it's not just because you know where you want to go but you know how to celebrate little wins. Let me say that again. Because that's like super important when you have vision it actually will give you more rest. You will find yourself not being so short fused in yelling at your kids and being short tempered with them And being frustrated with your wife and again it's not just because you know where you want to go but you know how to celebrate little wins. Another way of saying this is you can't recognize can is a win if you don't know what the goal is if you don't know where you're trying to go if you don't know what you're trying to accomplish then how will you know to celebrate little things that are helping you get it there and so for like for again. I'm I'm sorry. I know not everyone's into sports. I'm not even like a super big sports guy like sports a lot but not like some crazy fanatics I like spores a group around him so I apologize for you. Know kind of beating the sports analogies here but obviously as a as a coach. I'm trying to help my my kids when games and develop and all that but really I want them just to alert like learn individual Skills I want them to learn team like how to be part of a team and work together rather You know there's a bunch of little stuff teaching him and and I know like these are all things I'm trying to move them towards As a coach and so when they do something little at practices is even something simple as make good pass you celebrate something really small are what feels insignificant. Because you know that little thing is helping you go towards the bigger goal that you're trying to accomplish if we are out there literally with no idea what we're trying to do then. It doesn't matter when you make a good pass or when a teammate encourages another not made or whatever because you don't know that that's a win because you don't know where you're trying to go and so for us as Dad's what we want to do is create vision like cast vision for our our family. This is what we are trying to accomplish as a family and then when little things happen you know this is worth celebrating And so let me try trying to make this like real practical here because I know some of you are probably getting stuck when you're even thinking I don't wear much friendly. My family like I just want my kids to be obedient and I want my marriage to thrive in like we. We have more sex and we have money in our bank account like what. That's my vision league. We're we're we're trying to go here okay. So let's step back from all of that right again. I I say this all the time. We're not just trying to change behavior. We're not try and change your own behavior. Our wives behavior kids. We always want to get to the heart of the issue right. Where was WANNA get? We want our hearts to be aligned with the good news of the Gospel and then that changes everything at the end of the day when we're old men and were sitting by God's grace and a big Ole lazy boy like a recliner chair share and were were looking out at our kids and we've been married for a long time and our kids love the Lord and we've got grandkids who are learning about. Jesus like these. Hopefully this. This is kind of our vision. Our goal as a dad right. So that's what we're moving towards. That's the that's the goal. That's the that's the long term plan is that we have been used by God to see a family. Generation continued to love him and follow him on the obedient to his word and to tell the world about his good news. I that's the goal. That's big picture stuff okay. So whatever. Whatever is Contributing to things outside of that we can just say no to that so for some of us need to hear that big picture like Bro. It doesn't matter like your kids if they're flunking Kindergarten math right now. Yeah whatever that Sox at the end of the day what. We're really trying to do. Who is help? Our Kids Fall in love with Jesus to be obedient to his word and to really love God and love people. Well we're trying to be men who are faithful to our wives the way that God has been faithful to us. We're trying to pass on a generational generation after generation legacy of people men and women who fall in love but she's US and who love people well as a result right like. That's really what we're trying to do so anything. That doesn't contribute to that big picture. We just say no like we. We don't have to focus focus on it. We don't have to get our emotions really higher low if it doesn't kind of push us towards that goal but for me. What I wanted to do is like okay? So that's the end goal but let's work all the way backwards awkward. Just I wanted to make this as practical again last night as those lay my head on my pillow I wanted to make this as practical as possible for like okay. I'm taking ownership. I'm staring in myself in the mirror and ask him. Where do I need to own and then I thought what do I need to do today or for me? I was going to bed that night so so I thought what do I need to do tomorrow morning. So that I get my team or my family in a position to move closer to that goal. I don't want my house to be chaotic. I think I don't want my family to feel like everything's kind of disorganized not functioning. Well I don't want my kids to be disobedient. But what does that look like for me tomorrow. Tomorrow will really what it means for me personally like tomorrow is that I'm actually more present with my kids because my personal schedule has been too busy and so my kids will feel chaotic when daddy schedule Inman Wami schedules chaotic. And when there's no rhythm in the House and the first thing that needs to like start to get tightened up is is my own personal schedule and rhythm and so for me tomorrow literally..
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Well I want to dive straight into today's episode and dive into what we're talking about today Eh on today's Sunday and it's actually my daughter's birthday. You may hear her screaming in the background because she just had her very first cupcake For the first time she's it just turned one year old and down so she got her first cupcake. We just did a little family celebration and she may lose her mind. I don't know how she's GonNa react to that I know there's like a trend that this may be a Portland thing you guys can reach out to me. Let me know as maybe a Portland thing but There's a trend where people are giving their kids now. like healthier alternatives jobs to cupcakes. Maybe your family does this. Maybe you're wiser than I am. And you give them like. I don't know like a cupcake Broccoli. Broccoli cupcake thing and dead spinach cupcake instead of like. I just went to Safeway man like I just went to the grocery store and picked up a chocolate cupcake and I gave it to my daughter. She's one so I don't know if I'm the worst parent the world world. She's never had that much sugar in her life and she's probably going to be screaming in the background. That's a tangent all that to say Today's her birthday and we're really excited about it. She she may be chaotic in the background. So bear with me. I'm dead tired. I'm still recording. This podcast My bedroom after all these years in our little home and it's chaos so thank you for your Dad Grace Today's Sunday yesterday was Saturday coach. My son's soccer game indoor soccer games on Saturday and we played a game yesterday yesterday and we got just destroyed. The other team beat us. I think it was like seven to one or seventy two. We got okay. Let's not lie actually know exactly what the scores it was. Seven not be real bad and so this is I've I've coached soccer games for years. Coach soccer teams for years. We played a lot of outdoor. We're you know not to like this. Sounds really dumb. Because they're eight years old but we've done very well in their little leagues and played soccer. We've always put good teams Coach good teams and the the the kids have done really well and had fun together. And I'm trying not to like just brag on kids right now because they're eight and it's really stupid but anyway we're we've normally really done very well and now we're playing. Indoor and the exact opposite is happening. We have not won a game. I think they've the opponents in the last three games of scored twenty six goals against us and we've scored a total of four. We're just getting destroyed like a big time taking a piece of humble pie here Thanksgiving giving week and In the last three weeks and we're just getting destroyed and yesterday we're playing a game and we're getting destroyed by the other team which has been kind of the normal for us the last couple of weeks and I'm like getting frustrated. The kids coaches kids for awhile. And I'm kind of getting frustrated McMahon. We know better like the. I've taught these kids for Awhile Tom for several years. They know how to play. AWW same position and I'm feeling myself get a little bit frustrating and at the end of the game as I'm kind of sitting there just watching the other team pound goals on us. I was thinking This isn't really the kid's fault like for one. They're eight and two. They're not trying to lose like no kids showed up today thing and now I'm just going to let the other kids beat us like all. The kids are trying gene whether they're doing the right thing or wrong. Or whatever like they're trying their best none of them showed up to lose and so then I had this thought of the person that's really blame. Here is me as a coach i. I can't blame these eight year olds need to look myself in the face and Look at my I look at my face in the mirror and really just say like men like what am I doing wrong. Am I doing something. Am I not coaching them. Well and is there something. That's falling short on me than I need to take ownership of so you fast forward. The reason we even tell you about the soccer stories because fast forward I leave the soccer game. I come home. Layla goes out with some ladies from our church to celebrate a birthday party. And I'm here with the kids kids and so it's just me and the three kids and the chaos pure chaos trying to feed them dinner. I've got a baby crying. I can literally hear my daughter screaming in the background right now I can hear her screaming. Remain in one room wondering she like getting into stuff and my other two kids wrestling around and the the couch is literally flipped over. Like I walk in from the kitchen and and I go into the living room and the couches flipped over. We have moving boxes everywhere because we have to move people to listen to podcasts. It's just everything is chaos and my first reaction is again frustration. Like the kids know better. Why are you being disobedient? Why are you guys acting so crazy before bed which I don't know what kind of universal universal truth this is but like every kid just loses their mind thirty minutes before bedtime And it's just the most frustrating thing the world has been dealing with this for the whole have been a dad so anyway they're just losing their mind. Couches literally flipped over. My daughter's like digging in the trash my one year olds digging in the trash just chaos and I'm frustrated. I yell upset. I tell them. Go the room. Go Brush your teeth get ready for bed. And I'm putting them the bed and I put them to bed kind of like frustrated frustrated and I have this long speech with him and everyone kind of goes to bed grumpy and then I'm laying in bed. My wife still our Enjoying the night with her friends and so I'm just laying in bed in quiet quiet and I just think to myself the same thought that just had with the soccer team and it really is like how much of this is on them. And how much of this is on me as the dad that like. What do I need to own as the dad here because ultimately their kids and they will follow leadership and of course every kid is naturally naturally by because of San the fall there naturally rebellious and they're going to make bad decisions all the time but really like my first reaction is to blame all the time and I think it's easy for us as husbands and DADS to find herself frustrated at our kids when they're not being obedient or maybe at our wives and our marriage when things aren't thriving having when things feel chaotic on but I think it's super important for us as DADS to really ask ourselves? How is my leadership Our first first tendency is always to blame like this is. This isn't just a youth thing or meeting. Our kids thing like our first tendency is humans has always been to blame. Listen to this. Listen Genesis. Three verse nine. This is actually right. The very first time we see sin enter the picture Adam and eve decide to turn their back away from God to make their own decisions. It's decide I wonder. If God's design isn't the best and of I wonder if I should kind of make my own rules and do the life the way that I want to do life and then they sin and this is what happens in verse nine Genesis Chapter Three but the Lord God called to the man and said to him where are you and he said I heard the sound of you in the garden and I was afraid great because I was naked and hid myself. He said who told you that you were naked. Have you eaten from the tree which I commanded you not to eat. The man said listen to this first of all the man said the woman whom you gave to me. She gave me the fruit of the tree and I ate verse thirteen. Then the Lord got to the woman what is it that you've done. The woman said the serpent deceived me and I ate super super fast and fascinating. God says to Adam what have you done he says. Well that's this woman. You gave me giving me a better woman. I probably wouldn't have eaten the fruit turn fault. And then he asked the woman eve. Hey what did you do. Did you give some fruits. Your husband will you gave me the serpent. The serpent's here had he not been here. I probably wouldn't have the fruit. Everyone's passing blame to another person. It's literally been in the very first pages of the story of humanity from the very start When when we do something that's frustrating? We get in trouble or something that we don't like our first reaction is to blame. Just I mean you know this girl like you've got kids and you ask your kids. What did you do the first thing my kids do this all the time well? He made me while she made me while they started it. And we get mad at our kids for that right like Croatia until our kids. Hey own up take responsibility. What did you do? Is there something you need to be responsible for. Apologize for but just watch yourself and how much you wants to blame other people. This happens to me all the time you know when it happens most like when you're most aware that you are blaming as usually usually when you get hurt this is the funniest thing that we all do this like you. You could stub your toe in the middle of an empty living room. When you're by yourself and you just the first thing like who put the WHO? Who put the couch there? Who What Kid? Why did you like? We're just immediately starting to blame somebody like somebody else's responsible for this It's our first reaction isn't usually comes out when we're hurt but we always find ourselves when we're frustrated like who can I pass the blame off to and so when our kids are being disobedient when in our marriage isn't thriving when our household feels chaotic. Are I thought like naturally this is just you and your human sinful. DNA your first thought is who who can I be mad at who is responsible for this because certainly the subconscious thought is. It's certainly not me like there's no way I would be responsible for this and I guess what I'm kind of revealing myself or with the Holy Spirit really revealed in me just last night as I'm coaching these kids and soccer and then kind of had a more personal snow bigger experience as I get home and I see chaos in my home. My first thought was like who am I. Who can I blame? And then the holy spirit is kindness really revealed to me like what what is. Is it in your leadership that you need to own. Is there something here and you. Is there some lack of leadership in you that that may be contributing.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"Hey guys hope you're having a great. Start to your Thanksgiving week before we dive in today. I just want to remind.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"I'm clearly not out chasing facing tolerance for this trying to get rich off this thing So that was but that wasn't the reason the reason was because I felt like. Oh maybe I'm not good at this. Yeah and and then same with like a book review somebody will leave like a three out of five stars and I'm like Oh you know what I'm going to hang up the whole thing Because I'm this is I'm not could at this. Had I had a dad to as a kid being like who cares like who cares if you get somebody gives you a three out of five stars or say you're the Jolo hosting podcast who cares. Because here's who God says you are That would probably roll off my back a lot easier and again. It's not like Macho confidence. It's not this fake. We just WANNA be tough dudes who don't care what people say. It's we want to be grounded in our identity in Christ. That's what we want for our kids. I'm not just trying to teach my son and my my daughters. I that you just need to be tough and sticks and stones can break your bones but words don't hurt words hurt for sure what we're trying to do is give them a deeper foundation a more more solid foundation which is who cares what people say not because you're tough but because look what God says about you. This is your identity you were holy. You are chosen. You're delighted lied in because he loved you. Not because of anything you can accomplish. And then when they get out into the real world and thing people say hard things you can just be like. Yeah that's maybe. My Book was three out of five stars or maybe my podcast does kind of soccer. Whatever but this is what God thinks of me and it's not going to rattle me to my core going to be depressed for the next ten days or be chasing fifty different jobs and careers? Because I'm looking for my identity because this is who I know I am so anyway come go ahead. I'm sorry I'm rambling a bunch. No it's okay I was just I was thinking we're talking about how when Like a child is raised in such a way way that their identity is shaped by their father for good or bad Like what do you do then when you find yourself a thirty year old dad yourself self and you are just Kinda just confused about your identity and Don't always feel like do you are who got called you to be do feel like that kind of that child. Wouldn't you think of Your Dad. You just I don't know maybe heart starts pounding and you're angry or you're you feel sad or like all those so interesting how you know. I'm I'm thirty five now and I'm like I can think about my dad and just start weeping you know and Like what do we how do we. How do we move forward? How do we like find our identity now? I think not that this isn't isn't the answer like to just solve that but I hear for somebody. That's still struggling with it. Here's what I'm telling myself One thing is he's just knowing that the motivation behind majority of what I do is chasing identity because of the lack of presence that my dad had that alone is helpful just to like be able to put words and tie connections there. Start identifying some of your behaviors as like why am I. What's my real motivation here? Oh it's because I'm just trying to figure out. Am I worth something. So that's helpful by itself. The other thing is my my heart longs for the day as we talk about Rosa revelation. Where there will be no more tears and nor pain more sickness like this? These are all sickness pain hurting and Jesus will one day make that all new. I think we get glimpses of Heaven here. On Earth Praise God the Kingdom of Heaven is invading fading Earth at this very moment and so there are moments of healing for me. I will sit and be like man. I don't have to chase that because this is what God has done in. This is who he says I am but I will always care. There will be holes or ruts that I will die with And and in that time my heart longs for Jesus to make things right again one day. I can't win for spouses. I think it's important to just like I don't know if he's still call like Gospel each other but like when you start like for me for example not having heard a lot of words for my dad I always was wondering like does he love me you know he never ever ever said I love you like I don't I can't I try and remember and I don't know if I fabricate a memory or two here and there but I don't remember we're hearing it and certainly I'm quite positive I've never heard him say I'm proud of you and so now Sometimes you can project those things onto God as your father and an and sometimes I do wonder like am i. Am I making God proud. I don't even know if that's like a right question but like wondering. Would God say he's proud of me like you know. This is layla with whom I'm well pleased like doubtful. All ever hear those words you know and like just having somebody to kind of remind you like what is actually true about God and like what are some things that are maybe it just hurts from your own childhood or just you just projecting like who your earthly father was and you're projecting that onto your heavenly father and it kind of teasing those apart and Yeah I also wanted to say as we're talking the wives That I said this on a podcast. I was a guest on this week but for the wives listening. Just want you to know that your it more than like probably your your your husband's friends more than his bosses more than really maybe anyone else you carry such power in the things that you say to your husband and your husband Most likely is walking around with a lot of those holes or ruts in his life because he didn't have a dad say everything regardless of how awesome is dad is. He's got dad wounds somewhere. He's somewhere on the scale and the things that you say to your husband Carey deep deep weight. And there's many men who just need to hear from maybe their wives that babe art if for a wife to say a bear on proud of you you have what it takes and even if you don't accomplish anything your loved like the was just saying to Gospel each other to to sit like this is who God says you are and you don't need to chase after things like you don't have to prove yourself in this family you don't have to prove yourself in this marriage or to our kids you just deeply loved by God and we love you and most importantly like God loves you based on who. You are not anything you can accomplish. Those words wives like we'll we'll carry deep deep. Wait for your husband's and again I think there are a lot of husbands who are kind of walking around there. The problem solvers in the family. They're tough they're strong. They're whatever but man there's Oh boy under their who's wounded and they may just need to hear from you wife to say like to tell them the words the truth of the Scriptures the truth of the Gospel that they never heard from down so that's my encouragement to the wife's. I'll just end here by saying this again like Dad. You'RE GONNA BE MESSED UP UP. Your kids are going to have wounds. All of our kids are going to have wounds one way or another regardless of how we do at this because we're human and were sinful and were broken and we're going to hurt them in some way And they're gonNA carry that for their whole life but would we be parents who hold hold up a mirror to our kids and as they look in it we just point and say this is who God has made you to be so that as they go Out into the world again. We're not just creating like tough kids. Were creating kids who really were not creating kids or encouraging kids. Who really can go back to the truths of the Gospel that their loved? Not because you have the biggest numbers God said are your anything special on earth but you are loved because God loved you. That's it God loves you and your loved and delighted in by the God of the universe and I think when we do that we helped set our kids up for success. So they they don't they don't turn into confused adults who like many of us run around the whole their whole lives searching for identity and searching undefined worth. I hope that's helpful. Leyla thank you for hanging now. I know you're exhausted. It's been a crazy week or so grateful that because listen again if you give to. The Dad Tired Ministry. That's going to go to these conferences into our ministry for next year helpless. Lower the costs you get a free signed book out of it. We'll send that to you and you'll also be entered into win a two hundred fifty dollars Amazon Gift Card to pay for Christmas gifts for Christmas this year. We love gas. Thanks for listening to you later.
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"How's it going guys. Jerry Lopes back here with you on the dead tired podcast. This has been an absolutely incredible week for dead tired <hes>. I can't even begin to explain how amazing this week has been. It's the launch for those of you who don't know it's been the launched of the DAD tired book which I have been working on really for the last two years and it's actually been arriving in people's hands and people seem to be really enjoying it which is always converging <hes> but man. It's just been huge. You guys support for those of you who've been longtime dad tired listeners at and bought the book and just sending me messages. It's just been honestly it's surreal. I don't know how else to describe it. Just absolutely absolutely surreal <hes> blown away man. I'm just I'm totally blown away. God has been good. He's already using it to draw hearts back to him. which is really that's all? I want me and I just want God to use this book as a way for men to find rest for their weary souls. We're tired DADS AND <HES> I'm tired. You're tired the reason you're listening to this episode because you're trying to figure out what it looks like to be a man who's chasing after God and some of Your Dad's somebody who oh aren't dads some of your just men who are listening just trying to be more faithful to Lord and regardless of where you're at like most of us were just tired retired men and so my goal is that this book would bring rest your soul and it seems like so far that it's doing that in many ways so thank you guys. If you haven't picked up a copy I would love for you to pick up a copy and I just hope that it encourages you <hes>. If you did not get an email about the cruise you didn't win. Unfortunately somebody won the cruise which is super excited. I'm excited for that guy to bring his wife to come on the data cruise but if you still want to come on the cruise you have a few weeks left. September the end of September our is when crews registration ends for that so definitely would love to have you guys come on the cruise but you've only got a couple of weeks left to sign up. You don't have to pay for the whole thing by the into September but you do need to sign up. Make your initial deposit by September. So if you want to go on the cruise you didn't win. We'd love to have you come on. <hes> definitely go to data DOT COM. Click the cruise tap so you can come join us on the cruise before registration ends on that and speaking of registration ending. We've got to conferences one in Ohio and a couple weeks and then one in Austin Texas in November and the one in Ohio is filling up like we already have more people signed up for that than we originally expected so if you're holding now now I definitely recommend that you get your tickets now before that one fills up <hes> so anyway. I'm super excited. Come you guys out in Ohio and spent some time with view over there before we dive in today's episode which by the way I've got a guest on today's named David he owns a company called Rhodesia peril <hes> but more than that like he's just a normal dude. He's a normal guy normal husband and WHO's trying to figure out what it looks like to fall in love with Jesus into live radically in his normal everyday life life and I really love that I'm like I wanNA start having more guys on the show that aren't necessarily authors or celebrities or professional athletes are whatever like they're just normal dudes who who are trying to figure out what does it look like for me to be a worker or try to own a little small business and to fall in love with Jesus more help my family fall in love Jesus more and <hes> so I think David May he's done a lot of things but more than like all the cool things he's done. I just love this heart as like a normal do- trying to follow after Lorne figure out ways to help kids kids do that. He's he's a young daddy's fairly newly married. <hes> you know he's not like super doesn't have tons of years under his belt when it comes to marriage but <hes> <hes> he's just trying to figure out what it looks like to be a dad and have young kids into fall Jesus. I love it. I think you guys are going to be encouraged by him. <hes> he's got some really cool perspective that is going to be helpful for you <hes> before we dive in today's episode though I do WanNa take my friends over at blankets for sponsoring this episode if you've never heard of bleakest. I really do like them. I think they're really cool APP. Most of us is young. DADS don't have time to sit down and to read a book and to learn <hes> although PS. I hope hope that you do find some time to sit down and read the entire book but to like sit down and read stacks of books is really hard. You always hear all these successful like CEOS. They read like thousands of books and and you like how do you. Where do you find time to do that. I'm a dad like working husband. I never have time to sit down and read so if you feel like that I wanNA learn. I WANNA learn more but I don't have the time to just sit down and read a book. <hes> blinking is going to help you. It's one of the most useful APPS that I have on my phone what they do is they've got a massive library thousands of nonfiction books which they condense down into the need to know information all the key takeaways <hes> that way you can either read it really quickly or you can listen to it really quickly. which is what I personally like to do? I like to listen on my commute or while doing the dishes or while. I'm cooking dinner. <hes> just try to bust out a book or two <hes> even daily. I'll I'll try to get through those <hes> just to keep my mind sharpy. Keep learning. They've got all kinds of book business books health books <hes> the kind of the be the bestsellers new titles. They've got a massive library. There's over eight million people who use news blankets so it's really it's a it's a it's a really really cool APP. I sincerely thank you guys are going to enjoy it. <hes> to the books that I just recently read I want to tell hey guys about one of them. <hes> actually reread it again. I read this book constantly. It's called start with why by Simon Sinek Simonson is one of my favorite authors his book in particular start with why I'll go back and listen to that blink is just kind of the key takeaway versions of that book often because I just find it to be so helpful. <hes> I use is that kind of language a lot on this podcast but also with some friends when I'm just talking to them about what it looks like to figure out how God has wired them for their purpose Simon Sinek. It's not necessarily Christian book but it's a very very good book on just how you are personally wired and <hes> y you do what you do. There's another one called emotional intelligence <hes> by Daniel Goldman which is another great book. If you haven't read those and you feel like you don't have time to read those <hes> jump on blankets and just <hes> you know listen to the condensed version. It's going to be helpful for you..
"dad" Discussed on Dad Tired
"This interview with mike fisher mike super grateful that you're hanging out with us today for some of the audience who may not be familiar with you. Maybe just catch us up. What are you up to these days. Tell us about your family well well. I'm <hes> married for nine years and <hes> it just i've been retired for about a year some trying to transition retirement enough to two young kids six six months and four and a half two boys jacobs a._m. Wife's name's kerry and <hes> <hes> relive a little bit of different light but we're definitely grateful and blessed and <hes> discount enjoying a little bit of time to summer at home <hes> off tour orrin <hes> i school for my <hes> for my son isaiah so it's a big day. That's exciting man <hes> nine years. Do that's a long time yeah yeah. Where did you get married later ten years coming up on ten years okay. We got married july ten two thousand ten so yeah yeah yeah. How did you carry me. We met we met at a concert one of my good friends. Actually my mentors was good friends with her band leader. Who is now my best friend then. I pay for all his dinners obviously so they they kinda set it up where we'd meet at a concert in toronto which wasn't i'm too far from where i was playing and <hes> what is actually see so as a bit of filter. She made me go through meet and greet because she was like like well. What if he's a little strange. I don't wanna have to hang out with them backstage and be awkward and so i go through this meet and greet and little kids little girls thousand one allied goodness. Anyway ended up going fine. We all went. We're win after with her band by now. We actually we. We didn't really have a first day for about three months. We just talked on the phone regularly and got to know o._h. Other which was awesome 'cause come first date or is felt like i already newer yeah but but with somebody trying to set you up and they still put in the meet and greet line yeah but she she was like yeah exactly. I'm like yeah. You didn't have very good job of selling you go to bed wing man. That's how long did you guys date before. We got married. We are we dated about a year and a half <hes> yeah we got engaged after a a year and then a year and a half married so that's awesome house the six-month-old doing he's doing good. He's <hes> he's just a happy baby. Always he's smiling. He's decent sleeper but he's a he's awesome. I love a certain be fun. Fun age or personality is is coming out and he's awesome a lot. I've heard a lot of guys talk about <hes> like bonding with their kids as a dad normally takes a little bit longer just because we guys typically bond shoulder to shoulder like doing stuff as opposed to women are obviously growing the baby and face to face and if the recipe and all that stuff so <hes> did you experience experience or was there just like an instant connection for you. I found like the first one was isaiah was a little different and i was. I was playing so i wouldn't see him <unk> as much <hes> <unk> early on but when i did i mean i love always love babies have been around a lot of babies and your first one like everything's so new <hes> <hes> and i think i bonded pretty well with them. <hes> and then the second jacob found because isaiah was like four years old i i found i was spending more time with isaiah while carey was with you know jacob so i think even though i you know i've been retired. I have been able to spend a lot of time with them but that's like. Isaiah wants to do stuff. I gotta keep him entertaining. Let's go fishing and nuts do stuff to help carey while she's you know with the baby so i think it's been a little bit different that way but i love the baby i don't know i i just like the baby stage. You don't always hear it too often. I like changing diapers and everything. I don't know you just goes so quick and it's gone and you're like when isaiah was three jacob yet. You know you miss some of those. I am falling asleep under chest. You know on the couch and some of those moments but did you guys talk about before he started having kids. How many league wanted to have yeah. I've always i came from. I have three other siblings and my mom's you know come from families. She there's ten ten of them and my dad's got five siblings or six of them so a big family. I was like wow. I kind of walk forward. She was like let's. Let's see how one goes then. We'll take it from there but we'll see we have a bit of a challenge with our second <hes> as a bit of a gap and we we had some challenges but we'll we'll see what what god has for us. We've we've talked about adoption as well and but right now it's just managing to the best we can and we'll we'll see so yeah. I know you have referred to jacob as a miracle baby. <hes> why is that. Do you mind me asking sure <hes> well. We we had my wife and i had three miscarriages in between zia and jacob and it was just a struggle it it was <hes> you know i think it did bring carry night closer together for sure <hes> even though the struggles but <hes> so so i think it was after our second <hes> after second miscarriage actually coming back out of retirement in <hes> certain play again. I was doing a workout cout in god for whatever reason i was just struggling. I was kinda. Describe out to him that happens during my work sometimes than <hes>. I don't know what it is. It's working by myself and i just heard god say inaudible but just had the seas like you're going to have a son and his name's jacob yeah and i was like okay. I don't know why jacob i didn't i told carrie right away. She's like okay and she was pregnant at that time and that was with our yet. Yeah that was after two miscarriages shoes pregnant at the time and she's like okay sounds good and then not too long. We have another miscarriage this carriage and also that is like well. We don't know god's timing. Don't know you know and then we stopped kind of you. You know you try your planning and you do all the you know the the drugs to try to get pregnant and everything and and none of that was working and so we just stopped and then and then just trying to take the pressure off and we got pregnant again and <hes> then. We thought we had another miscarriage this one weekend. She called her doctor. I like <hes>. I'm sorry and and i was like well never know going monday. She's like okay. Well <hes> on that weekend she. She went up to sleep tale one night. She's having shoes have just kind of having god like wrestling with god. I was when he told me about jacob and she's like i can't do this anymore. I can't you know if i'm not supposed to have more kids and that's fine but i just i can't take this pain anymore and says she goes the dachshund the next day and everything was perfectly weekly fine and that was jacob so when she was pregnant along them. I don't really know why jacob i'm looking his name in austin qualities gwa is the planter. He's you know he's and it was just didn't make sense well. Then i put it together one day probably about halfway through pregnancy. I was like jacob struggled with god and he wouldn't let god go all night until he had till he received his bossing and i was like both carry barium and i had wrestled with god and and that's just a reminder and that's what jacob did and now he's we kinda calm. He's still do yellow miracle baby and <hes> that's why his name's jacob and we're grateful so powerful. That's harker man appreciation that yeah how many times in your life i mean. Do you feel like god speaks to you that clearly often or was that pretty rare experience rare hersher. There's rare <hes>. It's happened a few other times. <hes> you only happens if i'm being like really intentional <hes> but never her obviously audible and indian. There's still doubts really mean but i needed to tell right away. We're gonna have signed his name's jacob. Then it's like and god is always is like why do we ever doubt him when you go through something like manna and carries like never again while i doubt him after her jacob why did we ever doubt him because he always comes through crazy how we forget even huge stuff like that and and through it all to like it was kind of cave if we don't have another son god is still instill <hes>. He's still our savior. He's still good. He's still it's not just because he provided the son jacob that he's good and and i did never wanted to have that kind of always only good because he's doing these good things for us. No that's not true and trying to live through that in the moment god. You're good all the time. We need to phrase you through all of it and i don't want to ever come. I'm across like he's only because we have a miracle baby then and and that's not that's not true. He's always good. That's right so that's good stuff man <hes> so it's like it's pretty rare for a guy to like be intentional as you. It sounds like you're being just following the lord and like trying to lead your family mainly to jesus. Obviously you know i'm looking in from the outside but like how do you see yourself as the spiritual leader of your family and just trying to be like the the first one to point them to jesus uh-huh well i can tell you i guess my goals in what that looks like first of all i've had the great dad to model myself after <hes> very present one of the most selfless guys i know people know both my mom and dad are always doing stuff for people poland selfless and <hes> strong strong christians like solid character <hes> side had you know a great role model <hes> <hes> rare yeah no doubt so i feel definitely grateful for that and <hes> first of all i think most importantly is my marriage urge and the i'm loving my wife properly and the kids are seeing that and i'm lifting her up and encourage her and <hes> you know the best away i can and we were we definitely on a perfect marriage but i'm grateful that we're all on the same page and we love each other <hes> bear very much and <hes> we've. We've learned and we've grown over the nine years. There's always bumps in the road but <hes> you know i think when kids came along when is a._o. Was born it was <hes> something just changes india where it's like hey i. I don't know i it is remember. The first prayer had was like i just wanted him to grow up to be a man of god and i didn't care if you played hockey or saying or did whatever adverts like all of a sudden like my main focus and it's like that instant calling of this is what i want to be and you now i fail at it at times of being you know being that great dad but <hes> but everyone does and i find myself prank constantly for patients and then wisdom he'll being a dad is like man. There's things even marriage. I think marriage becomes a great eight mirror of of kay what my selfishness comes out in her marriage and i have to i need checks all the time my pride right and those things and and having kids you know things come out to or you know i find myself you know asking my little four year old for forgiveness and it's like.