18 Burst results for "Christel Alonzo"

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Netflix is A Daily Joke

Netflix is A Daily Joke

02:37 min | Last month

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Netflix is A Daily Joke

"I love being able to take care of myself, but I hate having to learn how to take care of myself. It's hard. And that's what we need to talk about more often. For me, when I got health insurance, I didn't know what to do with it. I never used it. You know what I mean? I was asking a friend of mine like, how do you use insurance? And then he's like, go to the doctor. I'm like, I don't go to doctors. I use vicks. I'm not kidding. He's like, what's vix? No one had ever asked me that. I felt like it was a hate crime. I didn't know how to respond. I'm like, what do you mean? And he's like, what's vix? And I was like, oh, I realized he's white. He has insurance. Right? So I was like, I don't know how to explain it to you. And he's like, well, what do you use vicks for? I'm like, your hopes and dreams. Dude, like everything. You can fix a flat tire with it, everything. It's like hoping a jar like is Obama in a can. Then he's like, I know you use it for everything. But if you read the jar, what does the jar say it's for? I'm like, who the fuck reads is a jar? I've never read the jar. And no kidding. He picks up the jar. He's like, oh, did you know it's expired? I'm like, I didn't expire? What? And that's when I realized I know nothing about vicks. I don't know what it is. I've never read to see what it says on the jar. I don't know what vix is. To the point that if someone has a gun in my head and they're like, bitch, what is vix? I'd be like, fucking shoot me, dude. I don't know. And then I would die. But that's okay 'cause I put vicks on the boulevard. And then I will come back to life. That's what vix is. That's the power. Watch christella Alonso, middle classy. Only on Netflix.

Obama christella Alonso Netflix
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Netflix is A Daily Joke

Netflix is A Daily Joke

03:16 min | 3 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Netflix is A Daily Joke

"I grew up in a border town right next to Mexico in South Texas. And I always think it's interesting. One thing we never talk about a lot is how so many of us grew up in bubbles. You know what I mean? If you're a small town, even in a big city, if your neighborhood doesn't have a lot of diversity, you don't know better, right? Because you're a kid, that's not our fault. I always say that when you become an adult and you go on to the world and you start meeting people, you didn't know about or you weren't familiar with the cultures. It's your job to learn about them and evolve. That's what we have to do, right? But it's hard. It's hard at first. You know, in my border town, we had no diversity, meaning we were all Mexican. Everybody in my neighborhood was Mexican. We used to call each other Mexican. What's up, Mexican? How you doing Mexican magnetic? You know? Then I went to college in St. Louis, Missouri. Someone were in a bitch. I wasn't ready for what I was going to meet. You know, just different kinds of people. Again, we were all Mexican, right? Even when I saw people on TV, it didn't seem real because TV felt so far away from where I grew up, right? So I was in St. Louis, first year college this guy comes up to me, ends up being my best friend, right? He's like, hey, what's up? I'm Byron. And immediately, I'm like, ah, Mexican. You're the darkest Mexican I've ever met. He was like, I'm black. I was like, oh. Oh. I was a familiar. Same thing with white people. I didn't realize that white people came in such different shades. There's like white and white. Like there's white and I'm like, are you haunting me? Do you go here or do you have a message from my dead mother? But I didn't know I was going to meet other people that grew up in bubbles too. That threw me off, right? My freshman year, my roommate, she was from Tennessee. She had metal Latina before. No one in her family had. Her mom was with her to drop her off, right? Her mom wasn't sure if I spoke English. We had been talking all day. So I don't know what she thought like, maybe I was just gonna forget run out of English halfway through the day, you know? Like, hey, how are you? Oh, I'm doing pretty good. Are you sure? And all y'all know. Trial expired of brave nor out of order no. Watch grisella Alonso, middle classy, only on Netflix.

South Texas St. Louis Mexico Missouri Byron Tennessee grisella Alonso Netflix
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

04:39 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"I probably don't think it's funny. Do you have a short story of an interaction with a legendary comedian living or dead that you'd like to share with us? Or you feel comfortable sharing with us? Or if it's gossipy and bad, you can tell the story without saying who it's about. That's the new disclaimer. Oh, I love that disclaimer because then because you know somebody did it. So often the first story people have is bad and I'm like, oh, that's the story we want here, but it tells me a nice story about a person you want to admit. Let me see. I'm trying to think, man, these questions are so good. They're so good. Let's see. You know, here's a short story, and it was actually about Jay Leno, because I hated, I hated that I couldn't do, look, I was a kid when Johnny Carson retired, right? And for years, I wanted to be on The Tonight Show and I couldn't get on The Tonight Show. And I remember I was doing comedy magic, hermosa beach, the owner asks if I want to open for Leno. And it's the first I've never met him. And I'm like, sure, I'll do it. And I go, and we talk, and he sees my set, and he asks me, how come you never did The Tonight Show? And I was like, I don't know. You tell me? And it was like this thing, 'cause I had that. Yeah. As like a chip for so long because I'm like, I want The Tonight Show, 'cause I was like, the iconic show. Look, it's either that or Letterman, right? And I ended up doing panel on Letterman on one of his last shows, so I was like, closest I'm gonna get, love it. Letterman kissed my hand. I have a picture of like a Letterman kissing my hand. I'm like, I'm done. And he was like, we should have had you on. And that? That we should have had you on. If I could put that on my tombstone, we should have had you on The Tonight Show. It was like such a redemption. You know, like when you, when you maybe break up with someone or something like that, and then you end up Googling them like Facebook in them, like decades later, you're like, I'm doing better than them. That's how it felt. Perfect. Do you have advice for aspiring comedy maker of any sort? Be true to yourself and don't let anybody tell you that you can't do it. And also know that a lifelong dream takes a lifetime. You never get to the end of it. All parts of it, the failures, the successes, it's all part of the dream. So don't try to do it. Unless you know that you're not doing it for money or fame. Because if you're doing that, it's so vague that you don't know how much money is enough, how much fame is enough. You got to do it because you really love it. And trust your gut, you want to do it for a reason. So if you think it's funny, it's funny. I wrote down lifelong dream takes a lifetime I've never heard that before, that's really good. This is the last one. Do you have a joke that you wrote, you thought was so funny? You may be performed a couple times or something, and it never works, but you will go to your grave being like, I was right there wrong. This is hilarious. Oh, man. I'm trying to think. Usually I just bury them. I hold funerals for all of them. Oh man. It was a joke. Man, I'm gonna bring it back. I think it's a joke about it. How as a country we're nicer to aliens from outer space instead of other people. We welcome all ET, we're just like, oh my God, he's adorable. Juan, get out of my face. It's good. I think that at the time when I was trying to do it, because this was years ago, I don't think we were, I don't think we were ready. But you know what? Now I'm going to bring it back. That's so good. Of course, I can't believe, yes, anyway. Great. I'm happy that this is a reminder to do that joke. I love it. I love it. Thank you. It's actually because I wouldn't have thought about it otherwise. Perfect. This has been thank you so much. That's so great. I.

The Tonight Show Letterman Johnny Carson hermosa beach Jay Leno Leno Facebook Juan
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

01:51 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"Behind the curtain, about to go up on stage. And I keep thinking, I want this audience to know how happy I am. Like, this is such a big deal for me. And the curtains open, and I come out, and I'm so excited. And they're right there with me because I'm so excited. I really get so excited that I get to do this for a living. You know, like Leno, Jay Leno and I talk about how we both love stand up so much. But anything else that we do is, you know, it's fun, it's cool whatever, but it's always about stand up. The fact that I can do it, I can't help, but smile. But also, I do use it as a trick at times. Because you can't preach to people, and you can't come off condescending if you're trying to teach people awkward truths that they don't want to hear. But when you smile, man, it's easier for them to learn. I can do a joke about what is it for my first special, like the good old days? Well, what were they, right? When were these good old days? If they were so good, why don't you really see a lot of black people doing Civil War reenactments, right? You know what I mean? You talk about historical facts that you do it with a smile. And man, it's certainly easier for people to laugh when you're smiling. And then afterwards, they're like, what the hell did she just say? So it is a little bit of, you know, it's a little bit of.

Jay Leno Leno
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

05:48 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"It makes me think I want other people to know that they can. And that's when I start thinking, well, how can they take care of themselves, right? So then you start thinking there's so many people that don't even know that there's outlets, there's programs available because some people are so poor they don't have the Internet, so we need to talk about that. So it's like this domino effect of all of this stuff that happens to me personally that I'm like, I have to talk about this because I don't want anybody else to talk about it. If I want to talk about it, why don't I talk about it? Yes. You're dedicated a lot of your work to your mother, the special. I like looking at the dedications of specials because some convenience don't do it. And you're like, this is dedicated to your mother, you talk about how the show was. And when thinking about you, I was thinking about the idea of dreams both aspirations and the American Dream and how your mother, when you first told her that you wanted to pursue these things, she was sort of against it, and she pushed back upon it. And it seemed like we had a very hard time with the idea of you pursuing your dreams. So now, you know, we're stuck about 15 years later. Of. Starting stand up or so, right? It's about 15 years. How do you think about your success as relates to that? Are you able to think about what she would think about your success? You know, that's the thing of what I'm reading your book or just thinking, that's the answer to a question that I as a listener was really trying to figure out. How do you think about it? You know, it's hard. My mom, my mom couldn't understand what I was trying to do, but you know, it's funny, my mom wanted to be a singer, she grew up in a village in Mexico with no electricity, no running water, nothing. So extremely poor. We grew up squatting in an abandoned diner and my mom's like, oh, we're moving up. You know what I mean? That's my mom, right? So her family mocked her and made fun of her and said, what are you doing stupid? You can't sing. We can't even eat. You know, so it's this thing where I think that a lot of times that idea stuck in her head, it's like, hey, you're poor, and if you're poor, you can't do all this stuff. So when I told her that, again, she's like, we're poor. Like, what are you doing? Like, you know, that's why I always say, and maybe you saw this, but I used to use this all the time. My mom used to always tell me, you gotta cut hair. 'cause even in a recession, people's hair grows. My mom didn't like, it didn't want me dating, but if we ever went out and she saw a guy in a suit, she's like, he's successful. Or a defendant. It could be so many options, mom. But my mom accepted that I wanted to do something different. I will say that my family, some of my family, referred to me as a black sheep, you know, there were times where I think my sister told her kids once don't be like cristallo. Like, don't do it. Like I was out doing hardcore drugs and just going on benders, you know? It's like, I want to perform. So. I think in the most sincerest way. I don't think my mom would have understood it. But I think she would have been so happy that I was happy. And that's like such a big thing. I think that she would have been so happy that her daughter was happy doing what she wanted to do because that's a big luxury in my family. The one of the things I always think about you doing stand up is that you smile. A lot of comedians don't smile. I don't know who told comedians not to smile, but somewhere along the way, they're like, you should look like you're not having fun. I mean, I know what it's like. I can see how it started, but it is a thing of beyond even there's one thing where comedians aren't supposed to laugh at their jokes. And I do think comedians are doing that more, but smiling, it's still. So we've talked about a little bit to sort of like, there's the joy of your stand up, there's sort of like a childlike wonder, even when you're talking about thinking about writing this joke, it is like so much, there's like a playfulness to even you and yourself. Where does that come from? How do you maintain that even when you're talking about things that are sort of darker, what why is that important for you and why is it just sort of a guiding principle for you? You know, it's funny. After the Conan said, there were so many people that said that I had had like one of the best sets on Conan, like, ever in a long time, it was like, and I always told them the same thing. I was very happy to be there. It had taken me ten years to get a late night spot. And I know that for some, it takes a long time, you know? Longer, or they don't get it. I was very happy to be there. And I remember thinking,.

Mexico Conan
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

06:12 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"Love being in politics and trying to understand and try to teach people that change takes a long time. And we can't be so cynical all the time, even though we try to be cynical, and I know it's easy to be cynical. We also have to celebrate that one time that that 1% change happens. Because change is like losing weight. You know, it takes a long time to lose the weight that you gained, you know, and for me, I started thinking about what I could do. And I always told myself running for office if it was something that I felt I could help with. If it was something that the community thought that I could do, that I could help with, then why not do it? Yeah. You mentioned social anxiety and you talk about that more the special than in the past. And it's interesting doing research on you in order, right? In the past, you really like, I started doing stand up because I couldn't afford therapy after my mom died. And now you can't afford therapy and you do talk about going to it, so you don't need to stand up to fulfill that role. And I imagine stand up failed in its ability to just be therapy. So can you talk about that evolution of a little bit about what's in it was, but more about once you realized, if stand up isn't going to be my therapy, what am I using it for? And what can I use it for, especially as it relates to talking about the things that are involved in that? Well, to me, actually, stand up didn't actually work out as a form of therapy. You know, well, for me, it was just, you know what it was, is that going through such a big loss with my mother who was the most important woman person in my life ever. I talked about my family and I talked about her, but it was hard. It was really hard. The first special I had lower classy, the last joke. I shot it in what? 2016, that joke happened all of that happened in 2003. It took me 13 years to actually get to that joke. You know, but stand up help therapeutically because it allowed me to talk about my mom and have people laugh at it. And to laugh at her, and it really made her, it made me appreciate the moments I had with her. A little different, you know? Because I felt like it was still connected. And again, the audience would tell me, oh, my mom is just like that. My grandmother's just like that. And it was just kind of like a nice sympathy and connection that I think I didn't think I was going to get. The thing is, though, is that therapy is expensive. Right? And in 2000 8, I went to therapy, I was very depressed, and I didn't know I was depressed. But I was seeing a therapist that was seeing me on a sliding scale. And I was so broke. But the last session I could afford was the session that she told me that I suffered from depression. And I couldn't go back to discover why. So that was 2008. Then I got this show in 2014. And I got health insurance. And I didn't know what to do with the insurance. Like, I didn't know how it worked, nothing. It was just kind of like this whole new ball game. And my show got canceled in 2015. 2016, I don't want to spoil it, but things happened in this country that really affected me. I fell into a deep depression and my friend Steve was the one that helped me decide that I needed to go to therapy. And it was this thing where I thought, I really forgot about therapy. Yeah. At that point. And then I had this moment where I'm like, wait a minute, I can afford therapy. And I went to a therapist, then I went to a psychiatrist. I got diagnosed with social anxiety and severe depression. And it was weird because I never shunned it. I never thought that I never thought anything negative about it. I just didn't have access to it. And once I had access to it, changed my life. Like changed my life so much that the first thing I thought, I was so angry at how I had to get a TV show on the air. To have money to take care of my mental health. You know, and how that is just a sign of what the problems are in this country, you know? It's just like you had to get a TV show. I had to win the lottery to go and like get medication and get help for something that changed my life in such an insanely like wild way that ten years ago, 6 years ago, I could never have imagined feeling the way that I do now. And that's why, and I know going through that, I think about it, and I think how many people out there don't struggle with that. How many people don't have that experience. And for me, being on that side where I am taking care of myself,.

depression Steve
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

06:04 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"It was this thing where I was like, I had no qualms about talking about it. That's one thing. As a comic, I don't care who likes me and who doesn't like me. If I get comments on the Internet where they're like, you know, blah, blah, blah, your opinion on blah, blah, blah, and you're wrong, and I'm like, then unfollow me, somebody else will follow me right back. Like it doesn't matter, you know? My mom used to always say, I've been hated by better people than you. Why was your mom saying that? It's a great quote, but like, why was just that person? Because my mom was actually she for a long time was undocumented and people would just, they would treat her, but they would treat her so bad. And every time that was like her retort, I've been hated by better people than you. And I live by that mantra because for me, it's about, hey, do you regret saying what you said? And you know, again, in a time right now where people feel like they're getting called out by stuff. You know, it's like, I always say, do you regret what you said? There could be a chance a day where you do. And hopefully you, you know, you learn better and you'll apologize because that's who I am. You know what I mean? But for the most part, I don't say things that I'm, you know, that I'm going to regret, or that I feel like I wonder like, oh, how are people going to take this? Because I'm at the point now where I'm like, I just don't care. Because I'm being honest. And it is what it is. So for me, it is this thing where the class, the class talk. Is actually, I think, so important to have, because class surpasses any kind of ethnicity, minority, anything, it's a universal struggle. You know? And that's something I think that a lot of people, I think that a lot of people that aren't familiar with certain minorities can easily vilify them for certain shortcomings or a short problems and stuff, but we can't deny that the ultimate problem is the struggle. It's easy to blame people if you don't know them. But the struggle is the problem. And I like talking about the struggle. Because again, one thing I learned in my, you know, in my career so far, I'm pretty much the anti the anti every stereotype or assumption that people have from someone that grew up like me. You know, the daughter of undocumented parents, you know, we grew up on food stamps. Oh, how dare you use government assistance? You know, but then as an adult, I give back all the time. I love to give back to the country that gave me so much. They gave me the chance to survive. You know? And it's that thing where that's one of the reasons I like to be so vocal too, 'cause I'm like, we're not all like the way that you assume we're all like. You know? And it always goes back to money and to struggle into class. In passing on one interview, someone asked if you'd ever run for office. And you said yes, and I was not expecting you that you were like, well, I achieved certain goals. Maybe I'd run for Congress around where I grew up. And one, I want you to talk about that, but also I can't even think of how to question, like most comedians, they're just like, oh yeah, I'm talking about this stuff, and I like talking about stuff on Mabel talk about this stuff. But I would never do whatever that means. And whenever I do the politics, how's it all intertwined for you? You know, to me, one thing that I think is very important to me is really trying I know this might sound grandiose and I don't mean it to be, but I don't know how else to say it. I really believe in serving the people. And I think that it actually came from it comes from doing stand up and really seeing people that are affected. And it's this thing where if you can do something, why not do it? You know? And because of the circumstances that my family grew up on, because they were so extreme, I have sympathy for everybody that has had the similar struggle or is going through it right now, you know? So for me, you know, like DACA. DACA, for those of you that don't know, DACA is a program, like that people undocumented. Undocumented Americans, as I call them, that were born within a certain number of years, they can apply to basically have a permit to be able to work and go to school here in the United States. I became a very big supporter of it because after my shows, people would tell me that they were undocumented. And they would tell me that they were on DACA. Now to apply for DACA, whether you get approved or not, it's a $495 application. That's a lot of money for people that don't have the money. So sometimes I started meeting them, I just decided to do free shows where I raised money and gave all the money to DACA recipients because the money for these shows didn't mean anything to me. Meaning that I could survive without them, but it could change people, it could change people's trajectory for a while. So why not do that? That kind of thinking, and that again comes from my family. It's this idea that if you don't have a lot, but you can give something, please give it. And I love working in the advocacy world, and I love being like, I.

Mabel Congress DACA United States
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

05:50 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"It's always been someone random from the industry that's like, I love that joke. Can you do that joke? And I'm like, I guess I can do that, joke. It's one of those things where it's like a party favor. But I did the set on Conan. And that immediately got the attention from people. And, you know, people were saying that late night didn't do anything for comics anymore. There was like, I was getting interviewed for these articles, like two articles. I can't remember the outlets, but they were like, you know, as late night dead for like, you know, and they would compare it to like the Carson tonight show days and stuff. And I said, not for me. Doing pretty good. So that late night spot, because it was so personal because of that resume joke. Because of what I was doing, that got the attention of, I ended up moving agencies, I got a development deal developed the show everything based off that Conan set. Yeah. It's just like it's a scene in a show and you're like, you could see exactly what it would be like, oh, that could be a scene, right? There's tones on television. Like, exactly. Yes, I think, especially that time now. Who knows what late night sets mean? But when it worked, it worked. There are just sort of jokes that were a mix of perspectives that felt unique and also. And not just stories of like, oh, we don't have a TV show about this Mexican family, but like literally like comedic perspectives are like, oh, we haven't, you know, I think of Pete Holmes said we talked about magic and that white people are like, that's new. If you just did the set, it just did the set, but it's so I remember you picked the joke, I was listening to the audio, I was like, I bet she did this on Conan. It just seems like such a good fit. Also, understand, you know, it's like, at that point, I had been doing the joke, but I had been doing it on stuff that people weren't watching. Yeah. So it was this thing where everybody, when people would ask me to do the joke, it's because they knew no one had watched a previously. On whatever I had shot. So it was this thing where I'm like, I had a moment where I thought, well, damn. I keep doing this joke, maybe they're not watching it because of this joke. Maybe there's a theme going on, you know? This joke, it's interesting because it's like, it's as shortest joke, but you're like, it's fun to see the joke now, 'cause you're like, oh, this is the seed of how she does talk about this, right? Especially in your Netflix special, you talk a lot more about class in a way that I think a lot of comedians just don't do it. I think for one because I think it might bum audiences out to hear about class or there's audience and be like, what does she know about being poor? She's rich now just 'cause you're even if you're not, even if you're just like, I'm struggling comedian because you're on stage. Everybody thinks that if you're on stage, you get $10 million a night. Now you are more successful. I think what is your impetus to talking about class? Why do you think it's important and how has your approach to it evolved as you have found more success? You know, it's actually that was actually an evolution coming from jokes like the resume joke and just because you realized what I started noticing and it was like the resume joke. It was the joke that I was talking about like expired milk. It's this thing where I never knew what was special about my life because it's my life. You know, it wasn't until after the show is because also leading up to the, you know, to like the pandemic, I used to do a meet and greet after every show for everyone. Yeah. And these meet and greets would last longer than the show. Like I would meet people for like two hours after the show. I'd take a picture with everybody because I was so grateful that people came to see me. But during that meet and greet, they would tell you what they liked. About your set, you know? And what I realized was that what was special about my life as seen by Hollywood. Wasn't special at all to me, because so many people grew up like I did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, but it was this thing where the ability, the decision to talk about how I grew up. That made so many people react to it at the shows that they're like, oh my God, you grew up just like I did. And that, because the reactions I would get were so big out of something that I never thought was very special. Because it's just how I grow up. That I realized, we need to talk about this more. I need to talk more about my life and how my life is so special, as seen by some, but not special at all as seen by most. You know? It was this thing where I started talking more about the way I lived the specifics and also it really was I'm really into current events. I do a lot of advocacy work and then I started thinking the advocacy work actually came from my stand up. It wasn't until I started getting asked by people to talk to do speeches and stuff at different organizations that I thought, well, I'm just saying my life. This is just my life. And it just evolved into this thing where I'm like, I didn't think that a lot of comics were talking about it. And it wasn't like a decision I made to stand out or try to stand out..

Conan Pete Holmes Netflix Hollywood
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

07:19 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"Talk. Like, if Edward James almost met him, he would want to teach him calculus. You know, like, right? So he's always weird because we grew up together, but it always sounded like we weren't related, right? Because my brother was like, hey, he's just nah, but you wanna go get something to eat or what? I'm like, well, we could do that. Or would you like to see what's behind door number three? Come on down. You know? It was him. It was that note that just like immediately taught me so much, you know? And again, that's one thing that I think in stand up is so important, you don't have to listen to everybody's notes, but if you respect them and they're telling you something that they don't have to tell you, maybe listen and see if it works with what you're doing. It's an incredible note because what he's doing is he's just noticing where there's information he doesn't know. It's a comedian, 'cause he's like, I'm observing an inconsistency in this. And you know, he could be calling you out on it, but mostly just sort of like, this doesn't make sense. And I'm curious about this. And what he is essentially doing is, and this is the difference between being funny and making sure you and the audience are laughing at the same thing. You're telling the audience what you want them to know about your sister about what you find funny about her saying these things, not what they might think. For whatever reason, because strangers with their lives and their experiences with words, right? So if you just say the joke, right? Let's say you take out the beginning parts. And again, like I'm sure you would have evolved if you did this now. The audience would be like, oh, she says that funny. Some money, but by the more you're able to convey who you are and who they are, then you hopefully are able to we're all laughing at the same things. It brings people in instead of just sort of like laugh at a stranger because it's not a strange. This is your sister. That's fascinating. You know, and you're right because honestly, you get so into your jokes and you get so into the material that you forget, you forget what you're giving off. The information that you're giving. So when Geraldo told me that, it really was this thing where I was like, moving forward, I really made it a point to think about like, am I really trying to say everything? Am I saying everything that needs to be said? You know? And you know, again, it's like that line, the chattels line, always gotta laugh because at that point, I was playing predominantly Latino audiences that all had a relative that they knew would say that, you know? And it was that thing where it was like a shorthand, you know? So when Geraldo told me that, I was like, oh man, it really changed, it really changed a lot of my perspective. Yeah, I want to harp on this board because it really is like the note that I feel like I would give most, especially early comedians more than anything else, which is like, I don't totally know how you feel about this thing you're talking about. Other than you feel like the audience will laugh at it or whatever, right? And when it's personal and especially when you're transitioning from, I'm just Chris Stella, the person who's performing in my hometown, whatever, to like, I'm on TV. How does it then when you're like your audience goes from 5 people you know to 50 strangers to a hundred strangers to 10 million strangers, the onus is on you is to demand more, right? It's like they are more strange than the 5 people that know you. And part of how you make it better is really thinking about am I fully conveying what I want to convey about these people. Especially these people I care about. That's great. I mean, so you do this joke. I mean, it seems like you've had the joke for a while. It ends up being on an album, it's 2014. It seems like it kept on popping up as this thing as the sort of how would I put it, as you evolved, it was there along the way and it helped you sort of guide you to where you're going. Were there other things that what did it mean to you, especially when you're in those periods, where you're fully forming what would be you as a stand up comedian? So here's the thing, right? So my stand up journey has been very difficult. Look, it's difficult for everybody. Right? So I started doing stand up in Dallas and in Dallas, I was one of maybe three women that were doing stand up and I was really like one of the only Latino Latina comics, so in Dallas, I was a comic. I hung out with everybody. We would do all the open mics, you know, everything. We were a community, right? Then I moved to LA and I remember going to a comedy club at a Booker told me, oh no, you're a Latino comic. You can't play these rooms. So you have to go and play the restaurants and bars and everything and blah blah. And I thought, well, this is weird. Why is it different now? What's going on? And you know, it was this thing where I was getting stuff, but it seemed like I was getting it a lot slower than a lot of the other contemporaries that I was coming up with. So I ended up I ended up getting busy on the college circuit, right? And I booked all these colleges and everything. One of the most booked college comics of all time. And my agents, at the time, love money. So they just want to put me on the college circuit forever, right? And then after a while, my agent at the time said, hey, Conan wants you to submit for a late night spot. And at this point I had been doing stand up for ten years, and I couldn't get anybody to pay attention to me for a late night spot. So, you know, they're like, can you go shoot a 5 minute set? And I'm like, yeah, I guess. And I shoot the set at comedy magic, my home club here in hermosa beach. And I submit it. And JP buck, who books, who book Conan, he comes back, has no notes for me. Yeah. Except one. And that's like, can you do the resume joke? Can you do the astronaut joke? And I was like, I don't do that joke anymore. Oh, I was wondering that because it seemed like you had done it. I was like, okay, it seems like and I was like, I was like, I don't do that joke anymore. He's like, I love that joke. Can you do that joke? And I did it. But it's this thing. Jesse. That joke, I only do it when people ask me to do it..

Geraldo Edward James Chris Stella Dallas Booker Conan LA JP buck hermosa beach Jesse
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

02:27 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"You can't tell me. That, you know, like my oldest brother doesn't have an accent or what have you. And what's funny is that that joke with my brother and the new special, I did last comic standing and I did like I did that last comic standing the year that Greg Geraldo was judging. And I did the resume joke. And he gave me a note, and he said, you don't speak with an accent. Why does your sister speak with an accent? And I was like, oh, because my siblings all grew up in Mexico. Like, they all lived in Mexico for like a decade. Yeah. Before they moved to the United States, I was born here and I learned English off of TV. And this is back in like 2000 something, you know. And he said, well then write about that. Write a joke about that, you know? And it took me so long to really write about it in a way that I felt like really conveyed what he was saying because it took so long, I loved Greg giraldo, right? I used so gifted, you know? And when he said that to me, about the resume joke, I started thinking, oh, but that's my truth. And then I thought, wait, but they don't know that's my truth. You know, it's like they don't understand my family. They don't understand the family dynamic, maybe it does seem like I'm being exploitive, you know? Yeah. It took like ten years for me to really understand. That's another thing in stand up that you have that I learned with my writing is that sometimes I like to over explain at the beginning to make sure that they understand where I'm coming from. Because I never want people to think that I'm ever disrespecting or not being true to whoever I'm talking about. So it's interesting that Greg giraldo in last comic standing was actually the middle of the resume joke to this new joke I have about my brother in my latest stand up. So that's how I learned to speak English. I would sit in front of the TV and I would just watch the shows and just repeat everything I heard. You know, like the voices, the accents. So in my family, I'm the only one that doesn't have a super thick Mexican accent. My brother, my oldest brother, he was born and raised in Mexico. And he's got like that stereotypical accent. Like if a taco could.

Greg Geraldo Mexico United States
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

06:57 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"Which is in wide oak, and that makes the vanilla flavor and smell that you pick up, come out of the wood. It's in the wood. Very distinctive and upgrade. I think it's the marrying of all of these flavors, the sweetness, and the oak Ness, that makes knob creek one of my favorites to sip and savor. It must be 21 years or older, drink responsibly, knob creek, Kentucky, straight bourbon whisky, 50% alcohol by volume. Copyright 2022, James B beam distilling company, clermont, Kentucky. And we're back with Chris Stella Alonso. So, you mentioned writing and you were like, well, what would be something my sister would say. When you're writing and or performing as your sister or any of your family members, what does it feel like? Do you feel like you know your background is acting like do you feel like I'm her right now? What does it feel like for you to like her, yeah? I learned this from my mom and my grandmother. They're both like they were both devoutly Catholic, but they used to love to gossip all the time. They were like such Catholic women that hated so many people. And I would learn. I think that's why I got into theater. I think honestly, my mom and my grandmother would talk to each other and talk about people in the neighborhood. And they would give each one a voice. You know? And as a kid, you knew, they always use the same voice for the same person. So if you heard that voice, they're like, oh, we're talking about Roy. What did Roy do? You know, so it really was accidental in that, to me, the act outs were kind of like just the way that my mom and my grandmother used to talk to each other. So it's like, every time that I talk to someone, and that happened in my family too, where each one of us had a voice that was assigned to us, you know? And if my mom was talking about one of my brothers, she'd be like, oh, and we knew that he was talking about my brother. So it always made us laugh, but it was always, you always knew who you were talking about. And when I was doing when I started doing bits, I started talking like my family talks. And it was really just assigning it, I had no idea. Even when I started doing theater, I had no idea that that was a skill. Yeah, it's so interesting 'cause it's like, there's some comedians I talk to, who when they do characters, especially their family members, they're not themselves anymore. They're doing their mom's voice and now they're their mom for ten seconds and they're themselves. The example I always think of is when I ask a little religious head with joke about his mother, but then after his mother passed away, he couldn't do it. It felt like he was visiting his mother when he did the joke. But what's interesting is that, essentially, what you're able to do is to take the character of your sister, you already had on stage off stage on stage. It's like, it's why I feel so organic. It's almost like the private character you have that you get to bring to an audience opposed to. Oh, I'm being my sister. What is a character that would make sense that I can translate? It's like, oh, I've already done that. It allows you to both an insight on your sister, but also on how you characterize your family members. Absolutely. You know, it was like, again, I think that also because of my mom, she was so good at giving us each attributes. That you know what I mean? We each had our own specific traits, you know, that apparently, but to us didn't exist with each other. Yeah, yeah. But my mom always saw it with us that, you know, it's so weird that I've like, how did you, how did you come to this conclusion that this is what I do? You know? And she's like, you do it. My mom was a short woman. She was like 5 one and my brother, my oldest brother, Ruben. I want to say he's like 5 ten. And she used to make fun of him and call him like a giant. Every time she was like fed up with him, she would always say, oh, and there you are in the sky, just being dumb. Like, all there in the sky and the heavens and, you know, and my brother Rubin would play a log and he used to call her a little fire ant. You would look down on her and he's like, and you're down there in the little hill. That's my family. Okay, these are two people that are like 9 inches different. Completely, but it's like so like, oh my God. It was everything. Yeah. You mentioned how you came up with like, oh, it would be funny to hear her talk about space stuff and say, you know, and I wanted to ask you about the joke hinges or there's a laugh you get from her saying shuttles instead of shuttles. And as a person who by having created TV show, I'm sure has had every possible perspective on how you're supposed to represent different people for us at you. When you're doing a joke that hinges on quirks of accents like this joke or there's a joke in your new special about your brother's accent. How do you think about it? Is there a debate? Has it evolved? I'll say this. What I learned from my TV show is that you'll never make everybody happy. And what I learned from doing my show is that the Latino community can be highly critical. You'll never be good enough for everybody. You know, my family grew up in South Texas. We grew up in a border town, where like Mexican American I'm first generation, you know? I talk about it in my special where a mixed status family, some of us were undocumented, you know? So it's this thing where I can only tell you what my family would do. I can't tell you what a Cuban family could do. I'm not Cuban. I'm not Puerto Rican, you know? So it's like, I would get these complaints during my show where people would say, we're not like that. And I'm like, yeah, that's why the show's not called every Latino in the world. Is it? It's called christella. So for me, I always say, what's the truth? Because I always say that you can always defend the truth. You can always be protective of the truth. It's not about exploiting. It's about being honest. And, you know, for me, like with the chattels thing, it's like you want to make sure that you're establishing that she doesn't belong there and that it's all a lie. In that point, you're trying to picture this woman who doesn't know what's going on. She doesn't know what's being asked of her, you know? And that's my sister. You know? But it's that thing where.

beam distilling company Chris Stella Alonso Kentucky knob creek James B Roy clermont Ruben Rubin South Texas Puerto Rican
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

08:18 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"And one, what does that mean to the people that are observed who are not used to it or don't even thinking of it? And what it means to be able to do that. And I wonder what it is, I think thinking about it as you are so much younger than your family, being in a position where you were put in a position where you were observing how people behaving, like there is like almost like when you tell stories of your family, it's like the view of a child seeing people doing things. Is that resonate? Yeah, but also, you know, it's funny, you know what I learned that really worked for me and by working for me means that it just felt natural was that the more specific I was, that's the secret that I think to stand up that a lot of people don't understand. And it's not for everybody. But for me, it's like the more specific you are, the more universal it can be. You know, 'cause what I started learning and it came from the joke, the resume joke, is that the more I thought about the specific parts of my life, the more they kind of resonated. And I remember, and I just sit down sometimes. First of all, I record every set I do. Doesn't matter where I'm at, open mic, theater club, all of them. I have been doing that since day one. Wow. And I have been doing that because I love the evolution of a joke. You know, there's something I'm a big Beatles fan. And I remember the first time I heard it was like 22 tracks of The Beatles and the evolution of strawberry fields. And you hear like the first, you know, like the first run to the finished product, and you see that evolution. And that's what I love about writing jokes. You see that evolution. So I record every set because I want to make sure that if you accidentally say something different and it gets a laugh, you have to go back and listen to why, you know, it's the why. And you know, I remember, I go around, I carry my notebook, and I love writing jokes down first, you know? You're fully writing it down. You're like, I fully write it out. And I'm like verbatim. I write them all. I sit down and I just, I'm very specific. And that's how I started doing it. Soon after the resume joke, I started thinking like, what is it? About my family. Let's talk about what I did growing up, or let's talk about something, and then one day I started thinking it hit me, that I was the person as the youngest, but had to taste the milk to see if it was expired. Right? And I started thinking, I know I'm not the only one that had to go through this, you know? And it's that thing where I hated it. It was that thing where everybody, like, my mom would stand next to me. Is it good? You know what I mean? You hate it having that job, but once I wrote it down as a joke, and I did it, I realized so many people were in that bubble. They resonated with it. They clicked, and that's when I realized you can talk about anything in your life because you're always going to find people that connect with it. But that's the thing, though. I think it takes years. I think it takes a while to understand and learn that. That in stand up, people try to be funny and they try to create and make things that are contrived that they think people will laugh at. But if you write something that's true to you, you'll find your audience. Yeah. There's a clip. I found a few versions of the joke and there's one where you do it on legally Brown, which it seemed like it was, I don't know where it aired, but it was a special that you did. Showtime, yeah. Showtime. So, and you're telling this joke and it's wonderful that the camera people got it because they're shooting from the audience perspective. And there's just seemingly this is what the visual narrative is that someone is holding the hand of a person next to them and pointing as if being like, this is my sister. And they did it. And it was amazing, 'cause usually it's just shot that almost never bears fruit in that way. And it truly like the entire joke is told from the as if they want to be like, do you see that? It's amazing because you think this is like, well, no one's doing this. And also like, you heighten it to a point, but it's like something about when you're doing it. It's a wonderful version of it because they are so, and I think it gets exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, no, and that's the thing, right? I think especially, you know, one thing I've learned in doing stand up, especially from my perspective, because here's the thing, I never, I never wanted a TV show. I never thought I was gonna get one. I mean, look, at that time, I had a crooked tooth. I was considered chubby for Hollywood. You know, I wasn't like the hot sex pot. Like I always say that with latinas, you know, for a long time in Hollywood in your 20s, you're like the sex pot and then somehow 30s through 50s, you have to go away, and then you come back as the wise grandmother. You know what I mean? I never thought that I would ever have a TV show. I never tried. It was actually, they approached me because of my set. Because I was talking about my family because I had so many stories, but that was accidental. That wasn't something that I ever tried to do, and it was that thing where, you know, for me, for me, it's kind of what I would say at the beginning, when we started, there were so many comics, I would say, you stole my idea. You did this. And I quickly thought, well, you can't steal my life. You know? So let's write about my life. You can never accuse me of stealing something if it's my life. Something that happened to you. You can be like, this is the time it happened to me. Exactly. We're also me. I didn't take it from you. Exactly, you know? Years ago, someone sent me a video of a comic, I think, in Atlanta. That was doing the resume joke. And they were like, they sent it to they sent it to me. And immediately, I was so upset, and then I thought, at that point, my joke had been everywhere. And I'm like, keep doing it, dude. You keep doing it. You're not a cover band. Someone will call you out soon. And I never heard of the comic again. That's funny. You're like, what's gonna happen? It's not like this person's gonna get more famous than me from my joke. Eventually, it's like the Internet exists. Someone will be like. Also, a known joke. So I want to go through each part of it because especially since you talk about being interested how it evolves, I'd be curious to see what you remember. So the joke starts with the basic premise, which you ever rely so much on a resume, you're actually shocked, they give you the job. So are you sure about this? Yeah. Are you sure about this? So talk about setting it up, what do you want to get across? That is a joke, but it's also set up, which is nice, like you're getting a little laugh on the way to the baker stuff. What worked about that and also just when you're starting jokes, how do you approach the sort of first couple lines? So really, sometimes when I look, a lot of the jokes come from just normal everyday conversation, right? Like you talk with friends, that's why I have my notebook or something. And I'm like, oh, that's funny, and I write it down. Sometimes with that joke, for example, I literally did sit down and try to write a joke. And to me, I treat it like a writing exercise. Yeah. You know, it really sometimes, you know, in order for me, I believe that in order to, you know, to kind of find your voice, you just have to use it. You have to write. And it's weird because I remember when I moved to LA, there were some comics that would make fun of me 'cause I always had a notebook with me. And they were like, you write down everything and I'm like, yeah, who does it?.

Hollywood Showtime Brown Atlanta LA
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

07:55 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"It's so possible to cover it. Yeah. So one day I decided, I'm going to try to write a joke that's very specific to me. I had no idea what I was doing. You know, I literally was sitting down in my little notebook, like my little black and white composition book and I'm like, what specific? What do I do that's specific? And I looked over at the printing software that I bought it off as depot and I'm like, I lie on resumes. I'm sure I'm not the only one. And I just started doing it. And I started building it out from that. And that ended up being one of the first big joke that people knew me for. So that's fascinating. So I wanted to ask about specific parts of that story because it's like, this is so clearly this builds through, you know, your first Conan sentence in there. So this truly is like the joke that is there from your beginning. And it's interesting when certain jokes were comedians, can be like their sidekicks in their journey. It's like, okay, have this joke and nothing else is good but I have this one and they're telling me the direction to go in. But so you're a fan of comedy beforehand. Had you been to a comedy club beforehand? I had. Now, I had gone to college in St. Louis for like a year, and Dave Chappelle was playing, I want to say it was the funny bonus. It was right after like half baked. You know? But I always already a fan of Chappelle. And I went to see him and again, that was the first time I had been in a club. I didn't know that comedy clubs existed. You know, 'cause all the comedy that I saw was on TV. You know, so it was just kind of like, oh, this is what you do on TV. But I remember, again, thanks to the trusty old school newspaper, I saw a picture of him and I'm like, oh my God, that's the guy. That's Dave Chappelle. I went to see him. And I thought it was kind of like, it was like going to a concert, right? Where you go, but you know, it's like, you go to a concert. I go see Billy Joel, but I don't think like, hey, man, let's learn the piano. Let's just screw it. Let's just learn the piano. Let's become Billy Joel, you know? So that was the only time I had gone prior to getting the job. So it must be like you're working there. You're like, oh, comedians are kind of people. I'm able to have conversations with them. I guess there's no big difference. So you take the class and if this joke wasn't in your first set, what were you doing the first time you did stand up as a contrast, right? It's like what even is that then when you're like, okay, time to do this thing I've never done before. So I actually have my first set. I have it online and it's private and the first time I ever went up was Labor Day 2003, I think. And every Labor Day or whatever, on my anniversary, I make it public, so people can watch my first set. And I remember, I do a joke about the game of life, the board game, and now it's so not life at all. You just succeed so much in that board game that even the failures you're like, I would love to fail at this, you know? So I did my own version of the game of life where it's like you got a new car, move two spaces. Oh, you got a DUI, move back three spaces, you know? It's like that was one of my first jokes that I wrote. I also did a joke about Walmart greeters. Because the commercials always showed the greeter so happy to see you. And you go to Walmart in real life and they could care less or like, why are you here? I did that. I mean, it was just my first stuff. I would do that game of life joke now. And I probably will actually know that I remember it. I had that, but I also, I used to do silly stuff. I used to do a joke about how vampires are always very artistic. They're always into art. They have played piano and stuff, and you never see a plumber vampire, like a blue collar vampire that's just like, I want to suck your blood and fix your pipes. That's a lot of my stuff at the beginning. Was this your first joke you wrote about your family? Wow, yes. That was the very first joke I wrote about my family. I just realized that. Wow. Did you have any, you know, like I assume at the beginning, you don't think like, well, one day I'll be interviewed by this, or one day I'm gonna be famous. So you don't think who cares about writing a joke about my family, it doesn't matter, but were there concerns? Do you have family that'd be like, how dare you talk about me? Like, are you just like, who cares? You're just like, I'm just gonna do it. You know, I think that my family, for the longest time, couldn't understand what stand up was. That they were fine with it, because I think that for the longest time, I think my family couldn't understand that anybody would go see me. You know, 'cause I'm just like, because I'm the youngest of four, you know. You could be successful. You can do whatever, but you're always gonna be that same kid to your family. And I remember it wasn't. Till maybe 5 years into it, that they saw a show. They were backstage at a show in Dallas. And they saw the crowd and it was one of my brothers was like, why are they here? It was so weird. And I'm like, well, because I'm doing a show and they're like, they're here for you. It was just so like they couldn't understand it. And at that point, I had already talked about them. And the thing is, everything I say is true. So they can't get upset at it because everything that I say is true. It's so funny, because it does make sense, 'cause you're like, comedy by nature, you know, there's that sort of conversational element. So they're just like, cristal is being Stella. She's just doing her thing. And then you don't realize, like, it's somewhere along the way. You're working on this on purpose and that an audience is interested in it. And now their characters in a world, regardless of even before the TV show, I like to like, oh, now people are come to hurt you as the repository of their entire history. It's really insane, especially, you know, on a very honest note, my family grew up in extreme poverty, and we were always kind of overlooked, or if we weren't overlooked, we were made fun of for being the poor people, you know? So we were very used to mentally, I think, to be, we were conditioned to think that what we did wasn't very special. You know, so it was like this thing, my family was all about survival, so anything that we did, I don't think that there was really a chance that we ever thought that what we could do could actually be noticed and be kind of considered different or special. So it was one of those things where my family, it really took them a long time, and I think at times right now, they still don't, they still don't react the way that I think you would want the family. When I told them that I got a second Netflix special, they're like, oh, cool. Like, okay. Like, okay, you know what I mean? Like, okay, that's what we're doing. Okay, okay. I told him I got a new tire for my car. Yeah, it's interesting because it's like, you know, when we think of observational comedy, you're like observation in comedy we think of like, oh, have you ever noticed airplanes or blah blah blah? But there is something about observing lives that are unobserved..

Dave Chappelle Billy Joel Walmart Chappelle Conan St. Louis cristal Dallas Stella Netflix
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

07:08 min | 5 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on Good One: A Podcast About Jokes

"Oh, some of you guys scared. That's the last thing I need to get a friend request from Visa. Comment on everything I do. Hey, today's payday, these are likes this. I am here with christella Alonso. Thank you so much for joining me. Oh, thank you so much for having me. So I was realizing when I was listening to this joke that I picture your sister from your TV show. Like I'm like, oh, the same person, but I realized on my place to start is who is your actual sister? What was your relationship with her like growing up? And as you get older, so just so the audience could sort of picture where you're talking about here. So my sister is she hates when I say this, but she's 11 years older than I am. And growing up in like a first generation household. My mom was working all the time. So my sister really helped raise me for the first part of my life. So we have a very close, very sisterly relationship that's almost a little bit motherly, which I think is actually a very typical in a lot of the Latino households that I grew up in, where, you know, the relationships, the roles aren't defined. You're a little bit of everything, right? But I think that's true in a lot of close families anyway. So my sister and I, she has three children. And when I was in 6th grade, I started taking care of them on my summers off of school. And eventually I ended up helping raise my raise them, raise my nephews and my niece because my sister and her husband were working and child care was expensive and so I moved in with them and that was actually the premise of my show. It was a real time of my life where I kind of just stayed there and helped raise my niece, my nephews and my mom moved in because she was getting on an age and she ended up passing away. Like I was the caregiver of everybody. So the 11 year gap when you're a child is so it's just so big 'cause you know kids at school are singing like the itzy bitsy spider and I'm like singing hard habit to break Chicago because she's going through a breakup. You know what I mean? Like the experience is different. But she was always my fake boss for every fake job I've ever had. She's always had my back, you know what I mean? So it's like that thing where look, you don't need to have experience if you can make it up. That's kind of where we go. So yeah, so as you get into it, explain the real history before we get to even what the joke or even before maybe a comedian, like what was actually happening, are there specific examples of what you did? Like, what did this actually look like? So my mom passed away in 2002, I was living in Dallas with my sister, and I realized I was kind of stuck. At this point, I didn't even I wasn't even thinking of stand up. I didn't even think of stand up as a job, but I needed, I needed some work. I needed money coming in. So I remember I applied, I was a server. You know, I was an actor. I was doing theater at the before I moved to Dallas, so serving was really one of my go to jobs. So I applied for this Italian restaurant that was opening up nearby, and then I had another job that I saw and it was a help wanted ad. And it just said office help. And I had never worked in an office. So I just randomly, I mean, I help wanted that in a newspaper. This is how I found it. And I showed up and it was a comedy club. Now, I loved comedy, but I didn't know that it was a job job. So I went in, I asked for an application, and I lied and said I could do all of this stuff. I lied and said, I was so good at all of these programs and everything. Just insane. And I instantly put my sister's name because she was married. She had a different last name. So I lied and said that I was her assistant at her job at that point. And I just, I told her, hey, Julie. If this company calls, tell them that I'm like the best assistant and that you hate to see me leave, but blah, blah, blah. And she's like, I got you all day every day. So I got the job. Yeah. And I remember thinking, I remember, so I had to answer phones. I had to create the marketing stuff for all these comics that were coming in the calendars and everything, and I didn't know what to do. I had to answer phones for the ticket sales in the first comic that I had to work the weekend for was Mitch hedberg. Wow. And Mitch hedberg sold out so quick, but I was just slammed with all these phone calls and I'm like, oh my God, I've never worked a phone with so many lines. You know, it was just one of those things where I'm like, oh my God. I went to like an Office Depot and I bought like this printing software that the kind that moms buy to make calendars and everything. I bought that software I learned how to make calendars out of that software over a weekend and I kind of got through everything. And the longer I stayed at the comedy club, comics would come by and they would tell me that I was funny. But the thing is, is that everyone in my family was funny. That's the thing. It's like the people I grew up with and I don't know if it's specifically like a Latino thing, but in my neighborhood, people were hilarious. We would die just laughing at dumb stuff. And I started doing stand up. Wanda Sykes came in, she was headlining, and she had Keith robeson with him, who he won't remember this. But he told me, you're going to end up doing stand up. And you're going to, I think you're going to do well. And I was like, get out of here. And then months later, I thought, you know what? Let's do it. Let's try it, right? And I remember, at that point, I had moved in with my brother, and I sat down one day, and I started writing a joke. And I was like, let's be specific. Wait, so what do I want to make sure I know a word that we are in this timeline? Because I feel like you know. So you started doing you said, let's try doing stand up. Is the Joker talking about when you're like, let's try doing stand up, what is a joke? Are we now this is the first we're talking about your first time ever doing stand up? Yeah, this is actually, yeah, so I didn't know what to talk about. I took a stand up class at this at the Dallas club because that was the only way that I could get on stage at that club because I was the office person. I wasn't a real comic, and this local comic de Lewis taught the class and I had a graduation show. I did the show and then I thought, I love this. Now I got a right stuff. You know? And I noticed that comics would do a lot of the same topics. And then they would get mad at each other because they're like, you stole my joke. You took my joke. And I'm like, we're talking about the most mundane thing..

christella Alonso Mitch hedberg Dallas Visa Chicago Keith robeson Julie Office Depot Wanda Sykes Dallas club de Lewis
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on WABE 90.1 FM

WABE 90.1 FM

01:58 min | 8 months ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on WABE 90.1 FM

"Need a little color in your life I'm Roy G Bill Bill Curtis And here's your hosts 2020 twos Most searched name on Google When Peter sagal is doing the searching it's Peter sagal Thank you Bill Thanks once again to our fake audience Later on we're going to be talking to the legendary rock guitarist slash We'll ask him about the burden of being confused constantly for a punctuation mark You know as in I love everybody in Guns N' Roses Axl Rose slash Izzy stradlin Please share your burdens with us when you call the numbers one triple 8 wait wait That's one 8 8 8 9 two four 8 9 two four Let's welcome our first listener contestant Hi you're on wait wait don't tell me Hi this is church Liechtenstein from Manhattan Kansas Manhattan Kansas I understand it's a toddling town What do you do there I'm a army space operations officer Oh Wait a minute You're not in the Space Force are you No I am not in the Space Force I am in the army Oh you're in the army doing space What does a soldier do in space What's your job We help the guys on the ground Make their lives a little bit easier Right So you're like looking down from you're looking down from the sky I mean you could pretty much do the job right there You got it There you are I mean I know we've got like Google Earth and we've got these satellite pictures and they're pretty good But I've always assumed that the satellite images you guys get in the military are really good So can you like look down from the sky and like pick out individual people like you could look at me and see my hairline and go oh yeah there's cycle Peter I don't think you're interesting enough for me to come down and look at you So Sorry about that Kansas humor Well introduce you to our panel this week First up it's the comedian You can see in LA on May 6th at the regent theater it's cristela Alonzo Hello Next.

Peter sagal Space Force Roy G Bill Bill Curtis Bill Thanks Izzy stradlin Manhattan Kansas Google Liechtenstein army Peter regent theater LA
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on KQED Radio

KQED Radio

06:55 min | 1 year ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on KQED Radio

"Wait. Don t tell me the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Chris Stella Alonso, Paula Poundstone and Peter Grosz. And here again is your guest host Who's doing such a great job? We can't actually remember who our regular host is daily Bill. I never get tired of hearing you say my name. Right now. It's time for the wait, Wait. Don't tell me Bluff the listener game call 1888. Wait, wait to play our game on air. Hi. You're on. Wait, Wait. Don t tell me. Hi. This is Tyler. I'm calling from Cleveland, Ohio. Hello, Tyler. What do you do in Cleveland? I am an artist and an art teacher at an all girls high school. Oh, uh, All my daughter goes to an all girls school. But she is not in high school because I was going to ask you. Do you see a lot of artwork that is basically unicorns. No, they're all um, crying all the time and stressed out all the time. So a dart work around. Uh oh. Maybe teenagers. Yeah. Maybe their therapy should be like crying unicorns. Their therapy should be. They should be forced to just dry unicorns. Just chill out and dry Unicorn. Fair enough. Um, Well, thank you for bringing your artistic prowess to join us. Tyler. You're going to play our game in which you must try to tell the truth from fiction. What's the topic Bill? City employee. We salute you City employee. It's not just another job. Andrew Yang failed to get this week We read about something new in the world of city workers. Our Panelists are going to tell you about it. Tyler, you pick the one who is telling you the truth and you'll win the weight Waiter of your choice on your voicemail. You ready to play? Absolutely great. Let's go first up. It's Peter Grosz, the residents of Sarasota, Florida. We're tired of hearing all the jokes and negative stereotypes about Florida. Man. You know, Florida man. He's always getting into minor scrapes of the law, either because he was drunk or on math or both. Or he got caught breeding iguanas and the employee bathroom at a Waffle House, and he told the police he thought they were just long turtles. So this week, Image conscious Sarasota Mayor Eric Anna said no more. He officially unveiled the newest city employee Florida Dan, Florida. Dan is an exemplary citizen. He's gallant to the typical Florida man's Goofus. He says. Things like Florida man makes sure his alligator is properly tied up in his yard, so he doesn't get loose and run through his neighbors, Christening or better yet, he doesn't own an alligator at all. Mayor Annise held a rally with Florida Dan this week and made the crowd take the Florida damn pledge where he repeated phrases like I will not mix alcohol with pontoon boating. Will not use gasoline to start my barbecue indoors. If my parent gets out of its cage, I will call animal control instead of getting on my grandmother's jazzy and chasing it across a golf course during the Kid Rock Invitationals program, All right, that was upstanding. Florida Man, Florida Dan from Peter Grosz. Your next story of a change for city employees comes from Cristela Alonzo Suit up and lace up those skates. No, I'm not talking about how girls summer I'm talking about Hot counterterrorism summer and Karachi, Pakistan, a new elite counterterrorism unit is patrolling the streets in roller blades. Some say it's just a PR stunt, especially because the city is full of potholes, which in this case would serve as the perfect counter counter terrorism. Also, it's not that great if all the terrorists needs to do to get away is just go uphill, But they do have advantages, said one roller soldier. Quote. We can even hold onto a car at 75 MPH. Another officer on Wheels, said. It's a new concept for the public. When we started skating, we were excited, but also nervous about falling. I think this is a perfect time to remind everyone they do carry loaded guns at all times. All right. That was counterterrorism on teeny tiny wheels from Cristela. Alonzo. Your last story of city employees employing something new comes from Paula Poundstone. The Covid 19 pandemic has brought about some innovations that may stay with us long after the threat of the virus has been quelled. French government agencies that deal closely with the public have not only switched the method of interaction to zoom, but agency employees have been issued hand puppets who's used the escalates the stress. Of the interactions. When they first gave me a silly little hand puppet. I vowed I would not use it. But the French public was so much more difficult to deal with during the pandemic, and most citizens already hated the French tax authority, explains Marguerite Blanche. A tax agent in the city of Grenoble. One time I told a man of his 84,443 €10.50 debt to the French government, and he began to spit at me. We were on zoom Still, He was so angry, so I took out my little hand puppet. And I said, Well, sure, Francois, there's not like when you spit on your phone. And the man became totally engaged with the puppet Since that time, I use a little more Sure. Friends. Why every day the French people they love him. Isn't that right? Little Mostert? Francois see him nodding his head. He says we and they are see Paula and Monsieur Francois. Alright, Tyler, you had upstanding Florida man from Peter Grosz. You had roller soldiers from Cristela Alonzo and hand puppets delivering bad news to French citizens from Paula Poundstone. Which one is real Tyler? As much as I wish it can be. All three Florida Dan Hand puppet on skates. I do believe that it's the Pakistan story from Crystal Okay to find out the correct answer. We spoke to a reporter following the real story. Pakistani police are being issued roller blades to help fight theft and harassment. It's kind of like a crossover between law enforcement and X games. There you go. That was JD Simpkins. Journalist for the military times who wrote about the roller blading Police force in Karachi. Congratulations, Tyler. You got it. Right. Thanks so much. You earned a point for Cristela and you've won our prize the voice of your choice on your voicemail. And you ruined my life. Yeah, Tyler. Thank you so much for playing with us today and have a wonderful student free summer. Thanks. Everybody. Take it easy. Bye. Tyler.

Chris Stella Alonso Paula Poundstone Peter Grosz Bill Kurtis Andrew Yang Paula Marguerite Blanche JD Simpkins Karachi Cleveland 75 MPH Tyler Cristela Alonzo Francois Grenoble 84,443 €10.50 Florida Monsieur Francois Bill Cleveland, Ohio
"cristela alonzo" Discussed on WBUR

WBUR

01:53 min | 1 year ago

"cristela alonzo" Discussed on WBUR

"Chicago This is Wait, Wait. Don t tell me the NPR news quiz. Watch out. I'm about to go. Bill s stick. I'm Bill Kurtis. And here is your host filling in for Peter Sagal. Faith Saintly. Thank you. Bill Peter Sagal is out this week. Free waxing for his fourth of July outfit. Gosh, that man is a smooth patriot. We have got a great show for you later on. We're going to be talking to America's most popular soccer broadcaster Roger Bennett. And in the spirit of what he loves, I will be doing the interview without using my hands. We don't care what body part you used to give us a call. The number is 1888. Wait, Wait! That's 18889248924. Now Let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, You're on. Wait, Wait. Don t tell me Hi. Thank this is Stephanie through found from Memphis, Tennessee. Hey, Stephanie. It's nice to hear a little Southern accent. Yes, there's a little in there. Tell me what you do in Memphis, Tennessee, So I'm the manager of education and marketing for the American contract. Bridge league like the game, the card game. And what is what does your job entail? Are you trying to rage raised bridge awareness. Yeah, that's the part of it. It's working Good. Alright, Stephanie. Now we are going to introduce you to our panel officially first up a comedian and actor whose podcast is called to be continued. Cristela, Alonzo. Hi. What's up? Stephanie? Hi. This sounds next. An actor and comedian who will be co hosting the new standup variety show. We fixed it at Littlefield in Brooklyn on July 14th. Tickets at littlefield nyc dot com. Peter Grosz Hello..

Roger Bennett Peter Grosz Stephanie Cristela Peter Sagal Bill Kurtis July 14th Bill Peter Sagal Memphis, Tennessee Alonzo this week Chicago 1888 Brooklyn America fourth of July 18889248924 Bill Littlefield first listener
Jon Batiste on Working With Stephen Colbert on 'The Late Show'

The Frame

03:18 min | 3 years ago

Jon Batiste on Working With Stephen Colbert on 'The Late Show'

"Start with a pianist and composer Jon Batiste. He's the bandleader for the late. Show Oh with Stephen Colbert John. He and Colbert. I met in two thousand fourteen when Batiste was actually a guest on Stevens old comedy. Thirty central show the Colbert report. Thank you Mr Battiste for being here Yeah all right you are here right. I'm right are you alive on the planet right now. They can in there all right now New Orleans jazz musician your work cross musical boundaries you worked with the Prince Lenny. Kravitz Wynton Marsalis your featured in spike. Lee's Red Hook summer and the HBO Series Tra may was based in part on your family. Are you the one with the dragons is that your family is Honestly I wasn't familiar with Steven or the Colbert report. And he wasn't familiar with me on my music and we met and there was just a spark that was something deeper and We aligned on a lot of different things in terms of what he really loved about comedy and how it can really bring people together together we can speak to something that is is tied to our humanity. If people watched the show they might hear ten in twelve seconds of song. But if you're in the house you're hearing a whole performance of peace and you're doing what four or five songs every day for the show yes about five or six songs As the opening theme and closing thing which I composed and we played every night and then there the bumpers that happened between acts and we have to act comedy one being the monologue want being a desk comedy piece and then we have two guests typically night and then and maybe a music guest so between all those acts and also walking on each guest. We play Stevens really open to give me the opportunity to just do whatever it is that I WANNA do. So we'll play all types of music on the show from video game music to Beethoven to Classic Jazz to top forty thirty two drake. I mean it. It ranges gentleman. We have a special guest joining us tonight. He has the Blues Jazz Club. Jaw the vocal stylings of former ambassador. Marie you'll find a bit with. Our Ukraine policy has been thrown into disarray. I do not understand Mr Giuliani's motives for attacking. How could our system fail like this? It's very intimidating. Wait a minute. President trump just tweeted at you every jazz club. Marie Ivanovich goes to turns bad. The what a jerk. Whatever we really bring to the show come from our life experiences Johnny Carson said this and he said to Letterman? Who then told it to Stephen? which is you gonNA bring everything we know to a show like this and you do everything you know and jazz is something that I do? So this a way for us to speak to what's happening in the world in comedies with Steven does it comes together on the

Stephen Colbert John Jon Batiste Steven Blues Jazz Club Marie Ivanovich Wynton Marsalis Mr Battiste Stevens New Orleans Johnny Carson HBO Mr Giuliani Prince Lenny Ukraine LEE President Trump Donald Trump Letterman