1 Episode results for "Chris Trunk"


The Complete Guide to Everything

1:11:58 hr | 1 year ago


"This is a head gum podcast hello and welcome to the League. I'd everything a podcast about everything and I'm married in this week. I've been better. Oh God top of everything else. We're trying to do this remotely is they're not allowed to be within six feet of each other. Yeah well Tim. You're not allowed to be within a hundred yards of technically right now. Yeah I mean that's spending in thank Mrs exactly so we'll put a pin in that in that In that little Situation for now you have to stay six feet away from me. we're recording through the Internet. And boy I thought they had this Internet thing all figured out but they still. There's still some kinks in it. You know what Tom thought they had a lot of things. Yeah turns out? We got a lot of kinks that we need to. We need to work on here. Yeah boy between everything going on and this recording. My eyes have really been hoping about how prepared we are to deal with crises Thomas. So yeah so it should be said. We are recording each from our place of residence where we are hunkered down. Have you ever said the word hunkered so many times in your life now? Yeah but nowadays. That's all I'm talking about is Begin hunkered down. We still are still out there. Do you think people are going to? I was thinking about this before as I was poring. My third glass of wine. I'm going to be so mad if when all this is over and we all get Outta here. If like some people are in really good shape. Yeah and I don't think that's going to happen. I think everybody's GonNa come. Outta this being like fifteen pounds heavier and we're all going to be like look it's fine. Nobody say anything. Well here's what I was thinking you know. I always think about like worst scenario framed for a crime and I go to and I go away for several years as you know what I could deal well in jail. You know what how do I would just do push ups and sit ups and pull ups all day and read. I become out the the smartest strongest man alive and four days into this And none of that has happened. Yeah no I keep thinking like I'm GonNa get so much done. I'm going to read so much and it's like now I do is read the news twenty three hours a day and get more anxious an upset but yeah. That's but hey that's why you're old pals timid Tomor here to cheer up those Quarantine Blues. Yeah okay And that's the last. We'll talk about that now. Let's Talk About Nineteen Ninety MTV. One time I was watching. Mtv Spring. Break Tom And Bill Bellamy was a heathen. Vj at the time. Of course I video jockey As opposed to a DJ the disc jockey right now the features have any say into what videos actually got played. No right absolutely not that was producer and yeah pay to play and how ever they did let Carson Daley in what Nineteen Ninety Eight. Do Scatter Day where he was into the Scusi right so they let him for some reason or not for some reason because of a sweeping the nation but like I think he was at the spearhead of the third wave Scott Movement taking over the mainstream Youth Culture Ram and. They didn't have a lot of videos to play at the time. His a lot of Scalia does. Yeah yes so They played like a lot of no doubt rancid. I think that one mighty my boss owns video. Yeah and you know what I think they might have even played living La Vida loca by Ricky Martin. Nuts it pretty much is a third wave Scott Song and in the video there. Dancing on chequerboard dancefloor. Oh okay well checks out. Do you foresee any point in the future Carson Daley Trying to spearhead the fourth wave of sky on the today show or the voice. Tom I think the voices or the boys. Yeah I mean the day. That's like the four horsemen of the apocalypse. The talk you if you're watching the voice and you see a guy come out and he's like I don't sing. I'm just a dancer I just skank. I'm the toaster. Yeah and then. They play music. Play back in crack he's going to chip and Carson Daley. That's my guy. I want to coach him that out. That show works Carson Daley. As a coach I watched I Wash Book Tom. Here's the thing about this situation right. I am so hungry for any kind of communal experience that lake after we recorded this. I'm excited tonight. that Top chef the new season is starting and I'm knocking I could just. Dvr In watch it in in fast forward through the commercials. Yeah but like I said no I want to like experience it in real time. Sit through the commercials and act like there's like a society. Everything's normal exactly So I was watching the voice the other day of in in that spirit to be like. Hey let's let's watch what everybody's watching because they're million other people at least watching this thing right but the chairs the judges who right now I believe are I can't remember even one of them Carson Daly's the host. He's not he's not a judge. I believe Blake. Shelton is one of the hosts. Okay yeah one of the judges the judges. I know he has been in the past. That's how he met his lover. Gwen Stefani Yeah of the Third Wave Scout Movement. Right Scatter Day fame. The Queen of the Third Wave Scott Movement. I mean who else is even out is even in condition now. Nobody I mean maybe there was somebody in channel fifty nine my my scalp and right your your high school Scott Man. Yeah but I don't think Aaron was really You know she was looking to take the crown of away from from gwen right. Yeah Anyway Blake Shelton Gwen. Stefani was not there. Okay Oh you know who was. It wasn't a Dell but it was somebody like her female singer now. Okay then there's a lot. I can't really narrow down. Look I know we usually try to keep things moving on this show. There's not a lot to talk about these days while I was Gonna say that I did. There have been some communal moments outside my building. This doesn't agree. No it's been. It's you know what I will say this on a cynical guy but it was nice. There's a guy Yesterday he went out on his balcony across the street with the big saxophone. Oh No and played New York New York on the on the big saxophone now. What part did he just do? You know he didn't do that over and over ten and ten Dan and just for four minutes. There's a guy outside Yankee stadium after the Games that will. Yeah on like trumpeter. Something right. Yeah but he just plays one part over and over again. It's like no. That's just the intro man. There's Melody No. This guy played the whole melody years. It's like one of those. What what's the Big Saxophone the Alto? Now there's a small one baritone baritone areas big Baritone Sax And it was nice. 'cause like I looked at the window because I'm like what the Hell's all that God damn racket I was I had I was calling nine one one at the time. Nice to complain what you should be doing well and it was annoying because the lines were all clogged up but the guys doing that and I and finally I'm like oh I see I think that's a real saigo and look outside on my gosh. Sure Shit look at that. Look at that man. He's playing the saxophone up on his Up on his balcony and then I can see. There's all other people like I'm across the street from like probably twelve story building with balconies. And everybody's on Chris Again. Everybody's out on their balcony doesn't he can't come here every out on their balconies and they're all watching him and like two stories below him. There's a couple slow dancing to it. And then when he finished way did Dan Dan. Dan Dan. Everybody clapped and cheered And then today he played lean on me. Oh Nice and same thing. They clapped and cheered the thing. That's great about the thing I'll I'll sing. This guy's praises all day. He plays one song a day. He's not wearing out his welcome. Gazette certain point it becomes your just practicing your saxophone on the balcony. Yes noar you're trying to go viral. Exactly yeah so it's it's been just like that's been the one nice thing this guy playing his saxophone. Everybody listening and cheering. It's crazy because like when he finishes and clapping and cheering. It sounds like you're in like a stadium. That's how that's how many people are like cheering. I'm pretty jealous about that. I guess we got ahead a balcony. Well but that's the thing it's a very nice but then when I'm looking out the window like this is nice. I Oh God I wish I had a balcony these so that's that's nice part to it. Yeah these celebrities have to stop doing these imagine mashups or whatever in the psych reminding us that like Oh yeah. We're we're all staying in or on our property as well but we live in fucking Xanadu have multiple pools but no. I'm just like you guys. I'm confined yeah. I'm confined to buy home. Which is bigger than like the area I traverse in day exactly would normally when when when craziness isn't just walking around the grounds of the more exercise has gotten less fifteen years. God Yeah I'm a I'M GONNA be so mad if people getting really good shape after this. I don't I think if it goes on long enough out of boredom we will get in really good shape. I'll start doing pushups. I Dunno I was eating so much candy. Today I was just like a upset about the whole situation I'm just going to eat a lot of candy. I don't care I allowed myself. It's called self-care Tim. I know it is called self care much called self-care eating three candy bars in a row. I I've been rationing all the candy that I have. I've been trying to do that. But Jesus so God damn tempting. Yeah sorry I'm trying to trying to look something up on the Internet. Tom Yeah Mall. It's hard to do while you're while you're also supposed to be recording via the Internet. It's called Self Care Tom. Where do you look up? How many candy bars getting day while quarantine no? I think that's a lot no I haven't I've had the opposite problem. I just haven't had an appetite at all. I've a little bit of that. We're like I'm eating things on board and then I feel sick afterwards. Yeah I'm just like I don't know and we'll we'll have tips on how to have some fun at home a little a little later in the in the episode. Yeah sure we will. That's also good at it. Yeah to me candy bars. I ate too hot dogs before. I don't even know why wasn't hungry or in the mood for hot dog hot tax now. The one thing that joke that I've been seeing a lot on social media is that like will the Vegan food section is the only thing that Is I picked over? Think Shit give that all to me. Keep me out of fake meat. I'll eat fucking sake hotdogs for the next six years if I need to That's not true in my neighborhood like I went to the supermarket a couple of days ago and they were like almost out of all the vegetarian the frozen vegetarian stuff like a meat substitute things like like veggie dogs. They were running dangerously low on everything although in in fairness they were dangerously low on frozen vegetarian food. They were out of everything else exactly so I guess people did get desperate enough. Well more you know. I bought two packages a hot dogs because there were literally the last hotdogs left of any brand. Now it's like what if this is it and what if one day. I want a hot dog again. Were you thinking? What if I got the last eight hotdogs on earth I got Tim? I got the last sixteen hotdogs on earth there were two packages. Well stormier countdown. Now I'm like one of the celebrities. Gal gadoe with their huge mansion and Tom with his sixteen were. They injected with cheese now. Tin They were the. I assume those were the first ones to go. Yeah even cover to food groups. Even though I'm a man that is in charge of zone life nowadays. I could do whatever I want. I still haven't bought congratulations that we're very proud of you. I'm no longer award of the state I've I've still too. I don't know what it is like embarrassed by the cheese filled hot dogs at the supermarket. Like I'll tell you. What if we get through this and those? She's hot dogs ever come back again. I'm not going to be afraid. Yeah I think there's GonNa be a real lust for life happening after this there's going to be a revolution cheese. Pork rinds. Yes screw it. You know what they were out of at the supermarket and again I was like this is my chances my opportunity to buy this without any kind of judgment about me they were all at a spam. No spam has even because at cheops yet they were even out of the frigging knockoff spam. What's the knockoffs the storebrand spam route seto spam based have or? Yeah Yeah they were out of that even but I I did think about. I was like you know what I've always wanted to try spam now. It'd be the one time where nobody would be like. Why are you buying this? It'd be 'cause there's nothing else in your store And then I thought maybe it will be nice. Maybe you know if things get real bad and it's hard to get meat. I mean it's Kinda hard to get neat right now in a span. Let me just let me just take this back. And we don't want we don't want to be purveyors of misinformation if they've got if they got spam by because I might be it. No No. That's the supply chains or find a numerous articles. Actually there's tons of meat. It was funny every every to come down. I don't WANNA I don't WANNA get cancelled over the super dumb joking that causes panic well but the but the meat doesn't keep the spam keeps exactly. That's why why I mean you. Could you could freeze meat yet. But then after a while it tastes gross. Doesn't I don't I don't eat meat. Yeah I mean. I haven't tediously malnourished among all right. We're look we gotta talk about what? Everybody pretty much. Everybody's having to do right now to self isolate. Yes so Social Distance Tim. Do you want to explain what happened in the world? Not necessarily do you think there's an like so you know one of the big like funny stories This is Jared leto coming out of twelve day. Silent retreat we need more of that kind of stuff. Well hopefully there's more people out there. They're coming out but I I. It was making me laugh. Jaryl came out of his silent. Retreat turned his phone back on in had like an email from you know chipotle layer whatever it was like what yes some like Like our response to the simpler simply said he got an oil change at one eight years ago. She's like just. So you know our cove in nineteen response. Jared LETO has never had his oil change in his life. I mean is cars have had their oil changed jared leto. I bet when his when his car needs an oil change he throws it out and get a new one. No He's a man of the People Jarad. Leto is anything. But a man of the People. He was just an a twelve day silent retreat. That's not something man of the people do. I mean I wish I wish I could go right now to like. You wouldn't hurt anybody. Just leave for twelve days silent. I don't think I'd be able to do that because I would. Just be so worried about everything. See jared. Leto doesn't care about anybody else. Right that's why I worked for him. This probably like Oh all right. Well back to the retreat Tim. We're talking about place elation and how to keep yourself sane in these yeah I am saying time I mean you keep saying this you wanna you WanNa make it like this this kind of thing. That's hoist foisted upon us. Yeah it is. I want it to be kind of a fun from home. Here's how to stay positive. Here's how to stay to keep your ear. Your mind occupied. Keep your body what it's just GonNa be like do pseudo coups. I've been doing so many mindless Ed. This is my number one. Okay okay this is the any kind of mindless puzzle. Game that is kind of like number based or word based they're fun because they occupy your mind Enough Yeah and if you're like me like he become like a little bit obsessed but like this point like who gives a shit. You have a lot of hours to kill you. Might as well get obsessed with like making words out of the word of the letters they give you And in one good thing is the New York. Times has a number of word games That are free with a subscription. The bad thing is I try to do that when I'm trying to not look at the news In to get to the Games you literally have to open the New York Times APP and scroll past every single news story because the Games are at the bottom so you have to like see every headline before you can go to the thing that you want to be an escape from reality. Can't ill that. I'm checking something. I'm they're checking this live and verifying it Tim. You can just get a New York Times dot com slash games. No I do. I do it on my ipad. Practically a boomer. These days tom well then I guess you can do it that way. I've been trying to get back into video games. Who could call? Because I've so many games that I just never finished and like games that I enjoy. But they were all games. I was like well. This is taking up entirely too much of my life. And guess what now I need something about going back and finishing Zelda breath of the wild who I hear. That's a good one. Can I am let me ask you this time? Nintendo switch that. I'm actually kind of almost keeping behind glass at this point where it's like look Oh I know I might become super obsessed if I if I start now. Yeah but I also want to preserve it for when things get if if things You know whatever go on longer. Yeah that's that's that's what I'm thinking I heard these log emmy wrapped up by the weekend. And that's why I signed. This episode comes out. People are going to be like. Oh where where re staying inside weird I almost I remember the Can I can. I download any commercially available game. I don't need to go to game. Stop at all right. No okay is apparently refusing to close. Have you seen those? Yeah and honestly there's stuff within walking distance of my apartment. Yeah and like you should. You should go in there and prove corporate right and show those employees. They're wrong. Well I mean there are people still looking at game. Stop Right now. The only thing is though like if you live near a game stop and you're employed there. Yeah and they're like Makita them open e and if nobody's coming in if you just go to game stop every day and sit in an empty place in and still get your hours in as long as you don't want to take public transportation. Man That seems like pretty sweet right. Yeah I imagine Reborn as the time the hell. I would assume though that prion the customers frequenting Game Stop Right. Now are people that like. Don't believe in what's happening. Yeah that's true improbably like WanNa talk about that with you. A game stop employees. I've also heard that they're being game stops. Were like an employee has tested positive for the virus and they Close that store and bringing employees from another store to clean the store and reopened game. Stop is not in good shape financially. I think that they are at the point where they're like if we close our stores. They're not real bright okay. Well let's let's let's move on. You're you're getting back into video. I can download these video games. Can you can buy any game nowadays online and download it Haley. I play Mario Galaxies out. What's up Odyssey Odyssey again? That was that was some of the finest twenty hours of my life. The finish it finished it but then you go through this at all the moons. Yeah it's a it's a whole new world. It is much like Aladdin and princess. Jasmine foretold each eerie allow all. This was foretold I got back into a red dead redemption to the game the game that I got out of playing because it was it was taken too long to ride a horse around everywhere Now I killed a ride a Horse. I would love it now. I play the game and I just watch a horse. Watch my guy riding around on a horse. I'm like boy is the best is so much fun. So yeah got back into that And that's just like a gigantic game so it's like all right cool. I bought this frigging game for like sixty dollars when it came out and only stop playing his it was it was too much like if you bought a like a book like Inexpensive Book. And then you're like oh it's a thousand pages long for. I really love it but like that's too long but that's where I am right now with with red dead. Yeah that's good. I like that. You're calling it red dead that's cool are D- are to How US kids call it? Is that the one a friend of mine. Did the music for that right now. It's a different What was the other one Far Cry Five. What no Yeah Really. Unless he also did the music for this. Don't think I don't think he did. I think Rockstar has all in internal people do all their thing. Rockstar named the studio that made it rockstars. Also a cool thing to tearing. Oh No it's a cool. It's a cool occupation to aspire to yeah or Rockstar or Ninja. That's a lot of the jobs I apply for. If they're looking for somebody who's a Rockstar on Ninja? It really cool right. Yeah well I'd like to be both of those things I show up in my my black my all black Ninja uniform. And they're like what the hell you can't bring a sword in here sir. All right so I had. What was my first thing that I did think your first thing was jerking off now Tom. I live in a small apartment with my wife. All right he said Sometimes it gets to be too much though and you have to take a break Tom. Come on there's going to be. My parents are looking for things to do right now. I know you said something about if you live in a small apartment with your significant other. Why not do it on the fire escape? Nobody's outside right now. I'm not a. My Management Company has scared a so much off of going on our fire escape. Yeah fake what's going to detach from the building if anybody know? Geez. I hadn't thought about that. I'd like they were just like no thought they want people to have fun. No it's basically like they're like you could not have a potted plant out there because if we get a summons from it all right it's like an eight thousand dollars ticket for. Yeah 'cause they ticket the property owner right right. Yeah that makes sense if I was if my building was on fire and I was escaping down the fire escape it. I was like I made it. And then I tripped over potted plant and fell to my death. Yeah I'll be pretty mad. Yeah definitely however right now if I go on my fire escape. 'cause I want some Hell's going to do anything about it. You think there's going to be like a beat cop walking around me like hey you get down from there. Yeah and I'll be right down like I'll forget it you say. Oh He's three blocks away time. You finish that sentence. Yeah I was thinking about something that something illegal that I think you could totally get away with right now but I forget what it was. The one thing that I'm bummed about. I'll save it for supplementary. Podcast crime cast. This is my this is my tip for people who can do it. Here's it'd be jerk off on the on the fire escape again because we've already heard you stop saying that please. My parents are listening. No I just wish we were in a state that had legalized marijuana. Yeah we're in New York state where it's not legalized and ACAS. Then he could just Toke up as it were more and more than like we weren't under quarantine or or under self or social isolation or social distancing social distance thing but put isolation is really self-isolation. Yeah but The after nine eleven You know they weren't like don't go out there. Actually go out. And it's like the air that's toxic. That'll be fine but the one thing that I really did that I found out was smoke pot. Yeah what do you mean that you found out? I found out that that was. I've been going through my records and it's it's like You know we're going through through tough times. Yeah and those were tough times and I felt like a good way to disengage. A little bit Here's the thing wherein engage have constant engagement here and we're looking at twitter. We're looking at the news. Were you know like in like look? Look if this happened in one thousand nine hundred eighty six. None of us would have been able to work from home and it would have been a disaster on that front but also we wouldn't have had people have been like. How did you hear? They're they're delaying. Dick Tracy the movie and be like ninety two flat. I got the Cup from from the McDonald's and I needed to ask you this. If I had known that all those feelings were killed in the first team. That was insane to this day. I'm bad about it anyway. Smoking Pot was was something that got me through it. can't do it now but. I think the difference between like post nine eleven. Oh I guess not. I mean this feels the most post nine eleven. The world has felt since after nine eleven which I guess is still now but the bummer is host nine eleven. You could get together physically with your life ones and be like. Hey we're GONNA fuck in like get through it. I think the problem right now is at least in New York City New York state and the United States. As a whole is that we're we're being told like look for the long haul and like things are gonna get worse before they get better so for that reason we'd isn't great because then you get paranoid but aren't there strains yes. I don't know how things work nowadays. No that's what I A FRIEND OF MINE. A friend of the show. Aj GP mad for. He's GONNA be so mad. No he was like somebody was asking about like marijuana term. There were like what I've never heard of this and AJ was like. Oh No that's the thing now. That wasn't a thing back when We spoke tweet but now it's like a term for like Like a part of the plant or whatever. Yeah they've done a lot more the KIEF dino about the Cannon. Oh about the KIEF. Yeah that's the thing now. They then I mean look. I know they're doing other. You'd be you'd be thrown out of illegal marijuana shop. They'd be like Oh. I get hit the hit the bricks old-timer I went to illegal marijuana shop in Los Angeles when I was there a couple of years ago and we went and we bought to pre rolled joints Because like anything else seemed weird to me but oh wait. Why is that? Why would just buying regular marijuana? The Win Gumy's allies edibles ads. Like that will come and go gay but the one thing that I knew that I couldn't do from pack in the Post. Nine eleven days without a drink alcohol immense smoke weed. That would always make me physically ill. I'd always throw I'll try that In so we did that And we bought two pre-rolled and it was. It was weird that we're kind of talking down to us a little bit out so I don't know it felt like they were like. Oh you're not like into the we'd Lingo. And by the way this this we dispensary was net flicks branded so net flicks. One of the biggest corporations in in the Sabin bought up a bunch of I think. A bunch of weed dispensaries. It was. It was like actually licencee wasn't like they were like. Oh this is no flicks man. No he was actually you. It's officially licensed and all the strains corresponded to net flix original TV series Yeah it's really sounds confusing then too. It's like well I'd like I don't WanNa buy like stranger things. What does that do? Just tell me what this actually is and this was twenty eighteen so is still like arrested development in house of cards like is all that kind of stuff. It wasn't you know I would about one day at a time. Oh Man so one day at a time stream we'd would help put all of us right now. What is one day at a time? I don't think I know that I mean I was just going off the title of it and we all got to take a unless. There's an old norman. Lear thing that they re rebooted for Say Anyway Says like okay? We got this and it was like the last night that we were going to be in. La We're on our honeymoon. We're going to go to Hawaii the next day and then we went and met a friend for drinks and that we went to this bar. Where like all these celebrities came in and not like celebrities but let Kumail Nanjiani and his wife. It was after the Writers Guild Awards Sir. Tom Cruise wouldn't have been no but like Scott Walker men and like all the birthday boys were there and stuff like people that I would never say. Boys is a sketch group for people hoping to leave that in Picky pissed but what was just excited that a bunch of people whose birthday it was the wife and I were meeting our friend. Charlie Charlie Brown from the miniature tigers there for a drink and now that's a ban. That's not actually tigers but there were so many tim not everybody lives in. L. A. And no south lingo. There were so many celebrities there. That's like I'm going to stay here in La for the first time. I've been a room entirely with celebrities. I cornered Kumail. Nangiani told them how much I like the big sick He did he. He's all nine. It's all him you know it'd be awesome. If he's got like real ripped man like just like really like work out for like a year eat. Anything don't realize I was the guy who who convinced him to do that. And you gave him the plan. You're like Jesse cod like Iraq And do these. Three exercises situps pushups jumping jacks. And you'll be there in no time pal and it worked I think. Do you think when these guys get into marvel shape that it takes years off their life. Why because it's like an unnatural like good shape like unnaturally fit. You know what I mean like. It's like your body fats like way too low. You're like oh no. It's like happening really fast. Yeah that's probably just feels like unnatural and all of them are doing steroids to. There's no way you're doing all that stuff in not being like. Give me a little. Give me a little juicy. Think Kumail Steroids go on record. I don't WanNa go on record. I'm just saying alive a subpoena record it and everything that you tim. I thought this is a private conversation amongst men between two boroughs of New York City Yeah I I think most of these not yeah most. I'M NOT GONNA say everybody but I think most of these guys they're take a might not be illegal steroids. I might not be illegal supplements but it's like human growth hormone or something. Well that's illegal right or no that's just banned in the major leagues. Yeah I think it's like you're not allowed to use it but I mean steroids if you're prescribed them and if anybody can get a prescription for steroids. I assume it's Disney. I mean celebrities. I mean they're they're the only ones getting the debt. That's right now Dr Goofy coming. Well we'RE GONNA WE'RE GONNA test this blood but in the meantime here's some steroids. The Rock is getting tested. Every fifteen minutes. Tim I What's your plan with laundry? Nowadays we are fortunate to have laundry in our building at our last apartment. We had inhale unit laundry. Which is wonderful. Can I go to your old place? Ever you know we. We disputed this because he was in Williamsburg It was a one bedroom apartment. Yeah we had laundry in the bathroom in cash. Here's the one thing that you might remember your old place now. This is the only thing that I think he would remember. That my toilet in the bathroom was like caddie cornered like it wasn't it wasn't a flush. Yeah it was the craziest. I've never seen that in my life. Tim USA toilet. That was in the corner not not up against the wall. What kind of. I've never seen that. Yeah sorry I thought my wife overheard than she didn't and then I just opened the door to larger. How could she over here? Tim You have headphones. And unless you're also pumping my audio redeeming screaming. I don't I mean the listener will decide ultimately troubled times third whiskey glass of wine. I so I. I think it's hilarious because like anyone that doesn't live in a gigantic city. Like New York or London. Right now is like Tim feels lucky. Because there's a laundry somewhere in his building. Most people have a laundry machine in where they yes if they don't live in New Yorker or London or L. A. or big cities I have laundry. I also feel lucky because I have laundry in my building. I have to go outside to get there because it's like in the basement. It's washing machines and stuff the washing machines they got dryers even but you have to like go outside and then go down a ramp. It's like a separate entrance but right now I'm I'm thinking. Am A little nervous. Having other people do my laundry be. I don't really WanNa like stay somewhere while my laundry's working See everybody's looking to save money right now because nobody has any work and D- I've got all the God damn time in the world. I'm thinking about doing my laundering. The Bathtub Goo artisanal laundry. I even Tim. I gave a little lookie loo. Look at the different options as pertained to wash boards no talent washboard. That'd be the depressing big. I've ever heard that maybe now leave my my hobby display like a washboard guy from now on your watch. Boards are so cheap. Yeah well washburn aplastic washboard real cheap like seven dollars about. How much is the one that familiar with? Two musical instruments. Come up ever the ones that you're familiar with Tim. Amazon's choice right now is eighteen dollars and it's a wood and metal washboard that could also use a mutual Kalin instrument. If I put some on my pimples on Nice Yeah I'll come over with my fiddle when this is all over and we'll clever self. It's a Goddamn hoedown them and afterward. We'LL PAN for gold. He might might be the best way we'd be wearing nothing but cover all reared their gold here up my washboard if we would we would west look for gold. You'd get shit kicked out of immediately. I brought my Amazon basics washboard to look for gold. It's crazy right now again not to get on sore subjects but that right now as far as like the economy and money goes like. I don't know I guess we'll see. Yeah Yeah backed is what you can do to have fun. I feel like even like a lot of people. Don't even have like anywhere near the anxiety they would have normally because it's just kind of a like well look. This isn't going to work if nobody has a job or money anymore. That's it look. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it which will be in a week two weeks. And and here's what here's here's my next tip off because I often. This is A true statement. Find myself spiraling down if I'm looking at twitter too much if I'm looking much fucking stopped doing that This has been great Tom Fucking facetime with your friends. Google hangout with your friends. I'm purpose purposely Putting corporations names This this zoom with your friends but like honestly talk to people talk to your family and friends over video chat You get silly real quick and it's a lot of fun I thought you're about to just like Get really sentimental about me. No no TA. I was ready to accuse you being very drunk. No now Iraq this podcast via the Facetime this is what it's all about. No I mean feel like it's easy to spiral down when you're like in a vacuum and reading very how absolute very kind of like okay. This is like fact based like you know. Here's what the experts are saying Blah Blah. And sometimes you just need to fuck around with your friends right and just do that or like you know. Sometimes you just need take nor experts or sometimes you just need to know. I'm getting listen eggs. Sometimes you don't need to hear everything they say every waking moment of your life. Yeah it's Kinda crazy speaking of People getting canceled like a so far the two celebrities that have been canceled. Our Vanessa Hudgens and evangeline Lilly. Kate from loss For basically claiming like this isn't that big of a deal which I a my if if there was a pool. Those would not have been my guesses for like the two celebrities have like I would think somebody like Mark Wahlberg may be would be like ads. Fine but Those two I'm surprised. Yeah and also like man. If I was on that plane coming from China originally well Mark Roberts also had experienced fighting ants. The wind go. That's true you know. See what we've seen every M night shyamalan movie. I haven't seen glass. That's surprising. Yeah and I haven't seen his apple TV series which actually here's pretty good. I forget what it's called the Servant Servant but yeah I'm surprised that these and INFO evangeline Lilly for people that don't know is being a jerk. Evangeline Lilly is basically being like look You can't suppress freedom on taking my kids to gymnastics right and that shitty. That's being shitty and everything Vanessa Hudgens said basically like look people are GonNa die but people die. I feel like that sucks but also like people speak like I'd I'd give her a do over on that especially when it's kind of like hey when everybody's going crazy crazy coming to terms with the fact that like yeah you know what people are going to die like to to to kind of talk yourself into that my name of like. I have to. I have to shift from my normal frame of of mine to acceptance of of the evitable here. But you have to. You know what who minutes in. So I don't really care Vanessa. Vanessa hudgens Hudson said something shady but like evangeline Lilly's saying and doing dangerous. Yeah exactly and also when I feel like especially when you're a celebrity like everybody assumes you already think the rules don't apply to you and you're basically saying the rules don't apply vitamin even if you're not saying because I'm a celebrity. That's the assumption therapies. Working under so kate from loss get lost. Who Tom. You should become a pitchy gossip columnist? Maybe that small do with my time. Oh God I B I b. That'd be a dream job. The greatest thing that happened was a in the midst of all of this Guy Brit Stevens. The OP ED columnist the Conservative op. Ed Columnist for the New York Times Posted an OP ed about like. Oh so I guess we're going to cancel. Woody Alad now and everybody started Duncan out of it as okay please. More of this stuff. Please like the culture war of six weeks ago or three weeks ago but one week ago is so wonderful. Yeah Yeah like that would have made me so outraged but now I'm like oh imagine this is what we were all concerned about. Remember when this was what. Got Me all riled. Up also woody. Allen is now cancelled. No what do y'all been canceled for years print Stevens. What the Hell. I mean woody. Allen son is leading the charge against him. That's enough for me to be like. Oh Yeah Yeah. The fact that freaking Still not accepted that Old Blue Eyes Frank Sinatra is his his father Rowan Atkinson distribution though Ronan Farrow. Yeah because he looks exactly like old to ask anyway. Knicks Jonas Blake. Shelton Kelly Clarkson John Legend all canceled. They're they're the they're the people on the voice. They've all said that this is a hoax. Tom Stop trying to get people canceled. Smell we're not tim in these self-isolating times. What are you doing about Food Tom? I'm making a lot of my own food. You can follow me your pal Tim on Instagram. And I've been trying. It's time for the plug in trying to Take my time with preparing food. Why not yeah exactly. It's it's something to do and I I realize like I've been trying to cook more in general lately And I always had this thing like I gotta get this done quickly like I have to like I always felt like there was some of the ESA and now it's just like now. I'm just GonNa GonNa do all the things at my pace. I'M GONNA put on excellent records from the nineties and just listen to them in my kitchen food. I didn't think about it. I should set up my record player. Yeah Tom's a great time to do and just listen to all the things that you like In my kitchen I have a so no setup So in my kitchen I have a soda. I I wish to say right now. I. I checked that it was too too much of a pain. The ASS I've been I've been buying. Luckily they haven't been running out of my favorite Seltzer light yet. Do you WanNa know what my favorite Seltzer. Unless you're of course I do in these trying times. Would you like to know what my favorite Seltzer? Nothing I would want to hear more. It is schweppes. Black Black Cherry Flavor has from what I understand. I think that I think the Schwer prevette since only applies to their ginger ale okay. My mistake teams Tim's Recalling an ad campaign from the nineties. Nineteen eighty-seven is probably. It had what's his name for Monty. Python. John Lewis. Yeah John cleese at least in the. Us is the most famous monty python. Yeah would you agree? I think that's Eric. Idle second ally people know who? Eric I know people know him but they might not be able to name him. Yeah Yeah I'm trying to 'em trying to. I'm trying to look up when those Schwer. Progressives ads were alive people know Eric idle from a European vacation. Oh yeah national. Lampoon's I mean I feel like not a lot of people care about that movie. Probably what he's most well known from Tom. What are you watching during this I've been I've been Gravitating towards kind of comforting things. I know a lot of people that I work with and watching contagion tonight and watching no break and I'm just like fuck you shut up here. You're all assholes. Yeah put on pornography like the rest of us. Know what what are your. What are your rex I have? I did watch contagion recently. I've never seen I'd never seen it before and it was interesting. I mean it's a much different virus like it kills very quickly. That's the thing about the contagion But then I also did start watching. I didn't know this existed. Or maybe I did at one time You know about this Limited series dead set. No it's Charlie Booker Charlie Bucket from Willy Wonka and the childhood truck factory. We're both I can't say. Chocolate factor with my words. Charlie Brooker the guy who black mirror fame so the show dead set is basically not basically it is. What if Zombie outbreak happened during a season of big brother? Oh I've heard about this. Yeah Yeah but the cool thing about it is that it's literally big brother. It's not like a big brother. Esque show they worked out the rights or whatever. It is big brother so it's pretty cool. I've only watched the first episode. I think there's maybe five and that's literally playing out for real. Yeah the German big brother. Apparently I don't know if it's still the case now. But as of a couple of days ago they had told the cast about one in the rest of the land was like Oh. There's so much backlash we're going to tell them. Live on television but also IRA. Hey guess what. You've been living in blissful ignorance in this fucking hot tub. Guess what your friends and family are at risk but you still gotta stay on the show. I A I found it fascinating. I'm not I I don't really watch big brother but actually like learned from watching dead set about it that they said on this German big brother that the cast was suspicious. Something was up because the last person who got evicted when they walked out there was no noise outside and normally there's like a live studio audience essentially so studio but they're like on a lot And there's people with signs and everything like screaming and yelling at the last person got victim. They walked at her just crickets and there were like what the hell why was there. Nobody outside But I don't I don't speak German. So you know I I'm not GonNa and also you know that's probably like the worst country casts at the skippy happening in is they're going to tell all these. German people this and they're going to be like okay. They're not going to have an emotional reaction to it exactly like I think they did the same thing with the Canadians like they told them. The Canadian cast of Big Brother And I don't WanNA fucking watch. I don't want to like. Oh here's somebody hearing something potentially very upsetting to him. Yeah and also they can't be one hundred percent sure they're not being fucked me exactly that this isn't part of the show. That'd be me if I were on that show. I mean I guess. I don't know how long they've been in there. They couldn't have been in there long enough to not have heard about it. In other countries like in China right because that was you know by December January. That was happening so I would think they have been in there that brother I know the the seasons are four years. Rayseka presidential term. Man I would never gonNA show like big brother. I'd never gone a these things. Even the real world I wouldn't re the real world is like two months Tim. If you are the real world narrow baby dunk it on you for being. Oh Yeah Tom. I remember the first time I felt old ever in my life was like twenty four years old and I realized up I can never be on the real world. Now ineligible exactly. They won't accept my application younger than twenty three or something like that. Yeah I'll give another tip. Here's another one of my. I'll get another to my homies seats and that's the kind of thing that would out you with the with the real world cast right away. Mold Tom. No everybody says he'll be sweet. You know to be true years and other Tom's top self-isolation tip just because yourself isolated doesn't mean he can't go outside go outside. Stay away from people like the fucking God this guy when I was. I mean. I have to go outside because I have a dog in this Guy Today. Like was walking down the street. I'm like this guy's GonNa move out of the way right. He like almost brushes up against me come so close and I was like I almost said like. Hey Man get away. Don't don't be so close. Don't stand so close to me. It really sucks. Because I can't explain to my dog what's going on. I mean your dog is like get. Outta here man you we. We had a pact had the The run of the fucking place for eight full hours a day. I mean to say part of it sucks because I think my dogs genuinely worried about like no. He's like very depress. You just home all the time right now. I feel bad but I was gonNA say the other thing I feel bad about is that I can't explain to her that she can't talk to other dogs right now or not talk sniff other dogs because if she's sniffing another dog that me and that other person or too close and we can't be that close. I mean get if he each have. Three foot leashes. Yeah but with the dogs get tangled. Well then they both have dogs breath. Have you been holding your breath a lot? I have not been leaving my apartment at all. I'm going out tomorrow to get some more groceries but Other than that. I haven't even really been going outside. Which is a Bummer I think I need to Moreso than well. Let me first off. Wrap up Holding my breath. I hold my breath when I walk past everybody in the supermarket Which is probably like worse is it's probably like I'm breathing. Something in and then holding get more of a chance but to last weekend I went to a state park and went on a high. I saw that I thought I instagram message. You Hey where is this and you didn't respond and I got mad at you for full twelve hours for responding to realize Oh. I didn't actually send that I thought about said that all right tough to fucking good to to to respond to a query. Well that's the that's the thing right now. If you're texting somebody guess what they're seeing that text message. There's no lying about just just seeing this. I was real busy. You know not doing anything staring at the wall but yeah I went to his State Park over the weekend. Went on like just like a two mile hike and it was great. Far Away from everybody. very hungry once we got there me and my girlfriend because We weren't really thinking and we're like when we got there is like we eat lunch. We should eat. Oh they have like a a snack stand But you had to like wait because only like one person at a time was allowed in its packet dam neck Santa. Oh next time I would I would. Yeah I would not even risk that little inconvenience people But it was very nice and it was like. Yeah we're not quarantine from going outside. You just have to stay away from people in the very careful about washing your hands so I would suggest that for people especially Unfortunately in New York for like the next week the weather is about to get shitty. Did you know this? Yeah skinny cold again in rainy a little bit. So that's GonNa be great for Bet's mental health. You know what I find that even going outside with an umbrella In a in a good attitude or not even a good attitude Felix just going outside does a lot. 'cause the MEG okay. There is a fucking world out here in allowed to access it right in you get wet. Who GIVES A shit pay year? What who gives a shit unless you get wet with a cough if somebody coughs that'd be last week. It's soaked to the fucking bowed. Tim should you? Should think. Very serious about southbound. I think your wife should probably find somewhere else to stay for a while. She has all right. Should we wrap so it can I? Can I say oh here? Let's do the plugs and then Then I'll do the thing and I'm a stay tuned after the plugs for very special special message I'm going to get like I'm going to talk about the thing a little bit to trigger warning. Okay so if you want to avoid the plugs into triggering you turn up now. Hey like our shogo. Tc GT DOT COM. Follow us on facebook. Facebook DOT COM slash complete guide? Follow us on twitter at complete guide. You can follow me on twitter and Instagram at Tommy at your pal. Tim and I'll be posting more photos of me more videos of me cooking. Listen to call ninety s music. Yeah have you want to support the show when you're buying supplies? Tcjc DOT com such Amazon and he can also join our patron patron patriot. Dot Com slash. Complete Guide. Are you hearing these set? Those are sirens on sharing. Mahan or I thought they were somehow sirens on both of our house like it's TCJC or no patriots dot com complete guide for our patron where We do books of PODCASTS. You get all the old episodes five bucks a month So if you're if you're looking to support the show during these troubled times and if you're a look into Like get a whole bunch of content. Once you sign up you get all the back stuff to keep books of the PODCAST. Going strong This week we've ended The Papa John Situation Saga so there will be a Shit. Efica poll pretty soon. Yeah Like we'll figure it will figure out the next book. I'll get that on my reader. Yea Oh yeah nowadays that and Yeah thank you to everybody. Thank you already support us on Patriot? But thank you to everybody listening There have been some very nice. Newt that that came in through Through red eye and seen those. But I'll look into through Patriot through read it through through wired. Find the time In in some emails to That like we're we're helpful and I know that I am very anxious person I am somebody who definitely can my mind can get away with me by buying. Qisas Chris Trunk but my might could have its way with me. Thank you get away with itself and then Kinda just like Run Wild and And I find that there are things that you need to hold onto When when you're anxious and I've I've heard some good things from people That that that we have been a good Distraction from what's going on and I hope that we can remain to be and we're going to keep doing this shit This is very very very dumb. Thing every single week throughout All of these quote unquote troubled times Hopefully we can get a little bit more on track with keeping things A little bit more on topic in but I consider this the an experiment into us. Keeping this thing going and we're all going to get through this together and it's GonNa be it's GonNa be fine and it's GonNa be. It's going to be wonderful moving forward. I was gonna say it's crazy. That like Both of US got like drunker than we normally get and like some people think we get like hammer during the show. That's not really the game. We like we a little silly share. But like I'm pretty drunk right now and I think it's just because this is like a rare human interaction were so even though we're not in the same physical place. Hey lead stirring up. Yeah I would also say by the way to go with your sincere thing and and also like a good self-isolation tip ever. Everybody takes for granted that like. I remember Tim. You remember when we were teens but we young lassus lags. Fuck the idea of video calling with still a futuristic God. This happened now when we can actually fucking see each other. Yeah but like take advantage of that video call people. It's nice. Yeah it's it's not the same as being in the room of somebody but hey it's not half bad. I think we I started saying this in the nose drunk and we went off on a million tangents but like whenever I do start. Spiraling down Video chatting with somebody really does does make a difference. It makes it makes me realize like hey. We're all doing the same thing in that. Were except while Evangeline Lilly. Isn't he eventually and free you on? Musk but old muskie himself doggy. Start a Musky right now. But that guy's got to put his money where his mouth is about making Santa later ventilators or else like go. The fuck away for But Lake honestly if you can Video chat with with someone. Someone you care about someone you love. It's it's it's yes especially if it's somebody that you know is You somewhat isolated. Yeah it makes a world of difference older family members and stuff. Yeah yeah teach him how to use the Zoom Zoom. You can do funny backgrounds. I had I had a thing with my office today. Who Do the best background at? I downloaded the picture of the cheers set and and I did. A cheers cheers. Set behind me and none of the fucking young people that I work with understood it. There were like Oh. Is that a bar that you go to restrain killer kind of shy? We're on facetime right now. Shaina make myself a draft. But it didn't work no it didn't Just it just keeps flipping the look. Here's the thing. Maybe maybe we should start doing kids. This is very very nice Tom. It's nice to see you says to talk to you. I feel like maybe if this thing continues. Maybe we'll I've heard it's going to be over any hour by the time this comes out you'll be like. I don't even remember what was happening right that weird game but like maybe we can start to do more kind of Interactive stuff like that. But Tim and now you're talking. I shall reality augmented reality most of the above put. Here's the thing I really appreciate. Everybody saying Nice things to read it and I hope we can be of some comfort to in these troubled times in I very drug so every still have to record books. The podcast after this. So if tim don't give away our production so if you're not this look we're going to be honest now all the things all the things are all all the facades are ripped down Yeah so I don't know we'll see next week. We love you very much yes That was a hit gum podcast.

Tim USA Times Tom New York City twitter Jared leto US Carson Daley Blake Shelton Gwen Gwen Stefani New York Times marijuana MTV League Mtv Ricky Martin Iraq Amazon China