20 Episode results for "Biko"

#58: How to Make Better Decisions

Mindset for Life

17:39 min | 3 d ago

#58: How to Make Better Decisions

"This is episode number fifty eight how to make better decisions. Welcome to the mind set for life. Podcast this is bethany. Your coach from dr be coach dot com coaching with power purpose and practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Hello there i'm bethany. Hanson also known as dr. Be the founder of dr. Be coach dot com. I'm an educator was twenty five years experience on an ics certified coach. I've created a website to share expertise and insights through some tools. And i also share this mind set for life. Podcast some of the people that i work with our online professionals coaches and educators who want to reclaim their power and purpose by providing personalized professional. Coaching and practical tools. To help out and my aim is to help you experience a transformation whether small or grand so you can lead. With a powerful sense of confidence fulfillment enjoy like. You've never experienced. Before as i think about helping you today. The area is decision. Making decision making is usually a lengthy process with many steps or a quick one. If you just really know what you want but how many times have you felt that you made a decision. You really regretted. Have you ever chosen something and wished you really had never considered it. I know i have and there are many decisions. I'm also very pleased with in my life. Today we're going to look at two strategies to help you with your future decision. Making they will also help you understand yourself even better the way you think about decisions and things you do. We're going to talk about those two strategies. Give some examples to help you out. And i'm fairly confident that you're going to emerge from this podcast today with a much clearer method to make your next decision. So thank you for joining me. And i look forward to sharing decision making with you today before i jump in. I wanna talk just a little bit about coaching. And what it is. Imagine someone who would like to learn to play a musical instrument one. Might i consider what instrument do they wanna play. What does it look like. what does it sound like. Is it gonna be fun then. We might consider taking one on one lessons and learning basically how that instrument operates how to make it make sound how to produce what we call a musical sound. Eventually we're going to join an ensemble like band orchestra and in the same way. Coaching is just like taking strategic one on one lessons debris out your best and use helpful tools to learn any new strategies you need. You could spend hours years and a lifetime growing as a musician and believe me i have. I play a lot of instruments. I have a piano downstairs. I still play. And i am a trumpet player as well and it's no surprise that we need to keep growing as adults throughout our lives in just the same way. Coaching is like music lessons for your spirit heart and mind and group. Coaching is like joining a band. Where you learn grow with other like minded people and share your own contributions as well as you think about decision making in the context of coaching. I want you to know that. I am a coach and i do talk about coaching topics. And i'm here to coach you today on your big decisions things. You might be thinking about for the future. There are two strategies. I'd like to share. The first is about the way you process information. I'm going to call these your three sensory. Modalities if you think about the five senses three of those are the visual auditory and kinesthetic in other words what we see what we hear or think and what we feel your systems are repetitive and these systems process really fast but for each of us they happen in a special order and we're all different people. Maybe we see what we want first and then we go to those other things or maybe feel something. I and we go to those other things so one is different in the way they make their decisions. And what sensory systems pass through the other strategy. I'm going to tell you about today. Is reflecting and considering before finally deciding. This is where you're going to take the time to decide what matters most to you. Once you've really made up your mind in some ways this is like a double checking system and for this. We're gonna use your values your preferences practical realities like a budget and timing and future casting like considering what will it look like in a month six months a year and ten years before i go into these two strategies much further i wanna give you an example of the first three the visual auditory kinesthetic processes think about moving to a new house. If you've ever done this you know that it's a pretty big decision. Takes a lot of time and then there's a lot of work we're going to do before it is finally completed. If we're buying a house it might even take several months to wait till that. Purchase is finalized. There was a time many many years ago in the very earliest year of our marriage where my husband and i decided we needed to move somewhere. We were not moving locally. We removing two states away from where we were at the time the first issue was i saw the need for a change. We were looking at the budget. We were looking at our home. Our living conditions and the sun we had at that point and we decided that we did need to make some kind of change whether it was to move or get a different house or something like that. Along the way. I went and researched the possibilities in this out of state location. I traveled there took pictures. I gathered data about potential salaries where we could each work. What kind of recreation would be available distance from our family members. The visual beauty of the area potential new things might learn and enjoy and also potential challenges and things. We might dislike after this. I shared all the information with my husband and we discussed the pros and cons. The various aspects of the potential move. This process began with the visual. Seeing a need going and seeing what was available gathering information and then discussing that was the next system the auditory. so far we've covered the visual and the auditory and next my husband. And i both flew to the city. We were considering moving to. We had a realtor take us to several houses and we decided we really liked one of those houses and we wanted to buy it and move there. We were primarily using the visual and kinesthetic senses here based on how things looked and how they felt to us. We put some money down on the house and then we flew back home. We thought about this decision. We reflected on this decision. We had covered the information we discussed weaves the visual we looked around We also went with what felt good. Did it have enough space. Did it feel right to us. was intuitive. Sense of full wholeness to the whole situation and really we started to have these strange feelings doubts we had actually within about twenty-four hours of getting home. We knew that the house we're about to buy was absolutely the wrong one. We couldn't explain it. We weren't sure visually if we had not seen something about it or Auditory if we haven't discussed all of it maybe we didn't have some facts about it but we knew the feeling was that it was the wrong decision so in this decision making process we paused. I went back down there and went to a second house we had seen together and still liked and we made an offer on a different house. It did go through and we ended up moving there and we were very very happy with that decision. One of the things that helped us out in making thorough decision was that time to reflect and consider and stay in touch with all of our senses. Especially the feeling part. We thought about the practical realities And the future of what it might look like to live there. Whatever it was that we had missed. We sensed there was something missing and something wrong and so we did not follow through on that first decision to buy the one house and we moved into a different one across town. We loved that house. It was one of the best decisions we ever made financially and otherwise and our children Started growing up there the first few years that we lived there until we eventually moved to a different house But thinking about the decision making process. I want to go over the first strategy. Listening to your three modalities. Your visual system takes an what you see. Maybe you see that. There's something appealing you'd like to do or something you'd like to have some experience. You wanna try you have this visual sense of what it looks like and it might look really appealing visually. And then there's also the kinesthetic sense which could range anywhere from touching it like sitting in a car and touching the seats of the car and feeling them to your inner feelings. Your emotions your your kind of sense of emotional state like. Do you feel calm about that decision. Do you feel uneasy about that decision. That's all within your kinesthetic realm and then there's that auditory it's what you hear and it's what you say about it. What others say about it and we might discuss it. Talk about the facts and details. There's a lot going on there. So these three modalities. They all gather information for us and they worked together incredibly well in fact. They're very redundant and they repeat some of the same information. It's great to think about all. Three of these modalities as you're making a decision. What do you see what do you hear. What are you saying about it. Have you discussed it out with other people. What do you feel about it. How does it feel and then when you've made your decision the next strategy is also very important and that is reflecting and considering take the time to decide what matters most to you the first area of reflecting and considering is your values now. I'm not sure if you've ever gone through and detailed what your values are. I have in when you go to coaching school. And when you coach people often you'll look at values quite a bit. Values are basically those things you care most about in life. One of those values for me has always been spirituality. So i might want to attend a church and when i was considering that move i also cared. Where was the church located compared to my house. Was there a church nearby. Was that even possible. Where were the school's education is also very important to my husband and made so. Where were the schools located. Could the kids walk to school. Were they close enough to attend school nearby or do they have to be bust their those kinds of things that we value matter a great deal when we make a decision after you've considered your values and reflected on that decision. You're making the next thing is simply your preferences. Perhaps you really just always wanted a two story house and this house is not a two story house. It's possible that you're going to say no to it. Just based on what you prefer and that's totally okay. In some cases you might choose to compromise. Especially if you're making that decision with someone else next. You have practical realities like budget and timing. Sometimes decision is right for you right now because of the timing and in six months it might be wrong. It might no longer work for you and the flip side of that is also true. Maybe a decision is right for you right now but it's not going to be happening for another six months so you know it's going to be right but you have a period of preparation between now and actually carrying out the decision. Those things matter immensely. Because if you don't consider your budget your timing and other practical realities you might try to take steps towards a vision. You have of whatever decision you're making and worry that you're wrong because the timing's just not lining up correctly when really all you need to do is give it a little bit more time. The last part of reflecting and considering is what i call future casting now the word future casting. I've heard has always been in a negative light of predicting negative future events but in this sense i'm actually just using it in a neutral way. Let's forecast in the future. What your decision will look like in a month in six months in a year and in ten years. Are there some negative results. We don't anticipate that might come out over that duration of time. Are there some positive things that are going to be even better as we start to forecast future cast what that's going to look like six months ten years from now. Maybe we're making a job change for example and that job change is going to give us a lot more flexibility autonomy and space during the day. And when we've taken that job change and we've continued it out six months ten years from now it might even improve our health because we'll have all this space to do other things around that job in our life like maybe we can exercise during the day and still do the job. Think about what processes. You've used in decision making in the past did you. I visualize something you wanted. Did you talk about it with someone else gathered data. Did you discuss with a friend or a spouse. Did you hear something that made you want to pursue a particular decision or was it a feeling you had. Perhaps you were shopping for a car. And the first thing you really considered was the feeling of the driver's seat the steering wheel the distance from the chair and the power of the motor. When you test drove it then next maybe you looked at the facts like the price. The stats about the engine. And its performance or the safety ratings and at some point you went to your visual modality and you considered the color of the paint job the interior upholstery color. The number of seats you saw in the vehicle and whether or not you need that many seats or need more and other visual factors if you reflect back on decisions you have made that well and you really slow down to identify your own process. What order you looked at the visual the auditory and kinesthetic aspects and how much you reflected and considered it before you finalize it you will be able to learn what your personal decision making strategy is when you're at your best and when you're making well-developed decisions likewise look back at a decision you have made in the past. That did not go as well for you. Did you skip of these steps in the process. Did you may be gloss over an area that you needed to look at because you were in a hurry or too excited to slow down and look at step or trying to compromise with someone else in your life. Today's takeaway is that you can make better decisions every time when you fully consider your three communication modalities the visual the auditory and kinesthetic. And when you have come up with your decision through these methods your second strategy is to reflect and consider using your values preferences practical realities and future casting. Even in the best of circumstances we can never know exactly what the future will bring and we are really doing the best we can with what information we have right now so trust yourself and trust your decision making process and go forward with confidence then adjust when needed and keep reflecting on your process as you go. Thank you for listening and working through decision making with me this week. If now is the time for you to make some changes in your life tap into your power for more confidence and get clarity on your purpose so that you can live as the best version of you. Contact me through my website at dr. Be coach dot com. I only have a few openings for new clients at this time. But i'd love to help you. Create your transformation whether small or grand. Here's to being the best version of you. This week this has been a podcast called mindset for life by bethany at dr biko dot com to find me on the web you can visit my blog or my website at www dot. Dr be coached dot com. That's d r being ceo. Ach dot com.

bethany Hanson dr biko
How to Listen to Your Inner Voice

Mindset for Life

18:29 min | 9 months ago

How to Listen to Your Inner Voice

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethany year. Coach from Dr. Be Coach Dot Com coaching with power purpose practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Hello there and thank you for joining me for the podcast today. This episode is about hearing your inner voice. Many of US spend a lot of time looking for answers. We want some guidance. We want help. We want someone to hold her hand and guide us through life. We already have an inner voice that gives us that kind of guidance. For some of us it may be our own thoughts or our conscience. Maybe it's the holy, Spirit, or heavenly father or God, and maybe it is the good spirit or forces out there in the universe. I personally believe that it is God speaking to me and you can, of course choose what you believe it to be whatever it is in this episode. I'm going to call that. Your inner voice so I'm GonNa. Talk about how to learn to listen to your inner voice. What value this guidance can have for you and how you can determine whether this is good for you, and whether you should follow what you find there. The first thing is how you can learn to listen to your inner voice. Many times my inner voice speaks to me through my own thoughts, my own words and my own voice sound in my mind. Sometimes my inner voice comes through a thought I might have that refers back to something. I've read it. Might a book a motivational book of some kind I also do study scripture, and sometimes it'll come to me through verse of Scripture. That comes to my mind. Other Times! Just be a song so I'll have music playing in my mind, and as I become aware of what the music is saying. Usually it's music with words all notice what the message of the music is and a lot of times. It's a message that my mind needs to hear. So, one morning I woke up with a particular song in my head, and was just singing loudly in my head, as if I was listening to it on a CD it was incredibly reassuring, very hopeful and very helpful. I chose to put it on my. IPHONE and play the song throughout my morning to further motivate myself and inspire myself to get through my day. So sometimes hear that voice through music. In my mind, I also studied music college for all three of my college degrees, and I've played music my entire life I used to write songs as well so it's very natural for the voice of music to speak to me. Maybe. That's not the most natural thing for you. It's possible that you might hear your inner voice through an impression of visual thought. If you're visual art type of person, you might even see a picture in your mind, something or think about a certain color or a scene that you've seen before or did you can imagine. For some people, an inner voice speaks to them through someone else. Perhaps they've been contemplating meditating on something praying about it, really reflecting about a problem or a particular issue, and somehow they'll end up in a conversation with another person where the topic comes to light and through the conversation, the answer they were seeking might come through in those comments from the other person so sometimes what we might call our inner voice actually comes through the voice of other people. If we're really listening, we can be aware of those answers when they come and those thoughts that push us in the right direction. So. Let's talk about how to begin to hear your inner voice how to become aware of it and take note of what's coming to your mind. The first tip I have for you today. is to create a place for your inner voice to be heard. This usually happens through some silence. It could be that it's early in the morning and you're just having a quiet time to think. Perhaps this late in the evening before you go to bed, and maybe you've done some reading and you're going to wind down in your bedtime routine. But somewhere during your day you'll need to set aside at least a few minutes to just be quiet and contemplate and create openness and space where this inner voice can be heard. The second thing is that you want to pay attention to what you're feeling. Emotions can often convey a message as well. You'll want to calm your emotions down a bit so that you can just really make sure that they're not driving the situation. When you're trying to hear your inner voice, so you've repealing some particularly intense emotion, it can help I to perhaps write them down or talk through them with somebody you could write them in a journal or just type them up in a document that maybe you're just going to save or even delete once. You've gotten it out, but getting out. All of your emotion about things is incredibly helpful as you're creating space for your voice to come through. Third. You want to notice something. You've heard in your mind more than one time. So, for example I was in a meeting a few weeks ago, where one of the speakers was talking about a specific subject, and what I heard that person say was one particular idea that really came through loud and clear. The. Next person to speak at that conference was actually talking about a different subject altogether, but the message I got from them quoted something. The first person had also said even though they prepared their comments separately I heard the same message in that second person's talk. Later that day, a third person started to quote the exact same thing now for me. All kinds of bells and whistles went off in my mind because I noticed this pattern. And it started to be very apparent to me that that was a message. I needed to hear right then. And, not everyone with me. Who was listening to that conference got that same message out of the experience, but it's definitely what I heard, and so I jotted down and thought about it further and realized that that wasn't message uniquely for me. So pay attention to patterns when you sent something over and over. And perhaps you should that down and think about it further. Another tip about listening to your inner voice is to be intentionally listening purposeful. About tuning into your inner voice when you have a sense or a thought or an idea that comes to your mind. Write it down. Find a notebook or something that you can record these thoughts in. For me I have two different places. I have a paper journal so I. Write in a journal and all. Write down these ideas that come to me. But I also use my notes. APP In my iphone and I will just dictate with my voice and all record those comments into my iphone so that I have them when they're fresh, and then I'll save them in a look over them some later time when I've had a chance to go onto something else. Then come back to these ideas kind of revisit them. Open them up and think more deeply about them. So one morning I had this distinct impression that I have a serious amount of resistance in my life towards something. And I realized it early one morning and I was thinking about how I needed to reduce my resistance to this idea. And I was resisting and by doing that I became the one thing standing in my way of growing and succeeding at this thing that I was working on. So I wrote it down. I thought about it. And I kind of went about my business, and look back at it later, and the next thought occurred to me. was that in the situation where I was putting up some resistance about this idea? I was also expecting a lot from other people, so I was kind of resisting situation because I wanted other people to do something or to. Play a bigger role than they were doing. So then the next thought I, jot down, notes was to let go of expecting from others and from myself, stop expecting compliance and different things from other people. So jotted down those two ideas and I thought about them. And Pretty Soon I thought of a few more that I wrote down so whatever you decide to use as your note taker, you can do it on paper, or you can do it in some kind of APP on your phone. Keep track of the ideas and add to them. And Pretty soon these little impressions that you've had will fill out into more complete thoughts. Your sub-conscious brain will continue to work on them while you're moving onto something else so that when you can come back to them at another quiet time, a place to kind of reflect and dig into thinking you'll be able to see more clearly what the message is for you and what you can do with it. Another tip I have for you about learning to listen to. Your inner voice is about analysis and logical thinking now a lot of times. When we're dealing with a problem, we'll bring it up into the. Purposeful areas of our thought patterns, and we'll really analyze it will pros and cons, and we'll look at all those things and pick it apart. There's a time and a place for that, and that is very important, but when we're trying to listen to the inner voice, be careful not to become too analytical to quickly. Instead entertained curiously by thinking with openness and questions. The brain really wants to close loops. It doesn't like unanswered questions so when your mind suggest to you a certain pass to follow or an idea to begin investigating further, it's very easy for your subconscious brain to step in and answer the question. An argument about why you should not follow a certain path. It's very quick at things down again. Because it's automatic, it really wants to close the loop. Solve a problem and give you the answers as quickly as possible. So when you're learning to listen to your inner voice. Be Open about it and be careful not to shoot down your own ideas, then it can become very complicated and difficult to hear your inner voice. As you learn to listen to your inner voice. Think about your body. When you're feeling something thinking about a situation or an idea or a scenario. Notice whether you're having any tension in your body. Sometimes you might actually have a physical response to thought you may be having. For example if you've been under a lot of stress about a particular issue, maybe it's approached project at work or something happening at work when you think about that project. If you were to have say a kind of a cramp in your shoulder or a heaviness on your back. It might actually be your body's way of responding to the sensation that your mind is creating. Perhaps it feels like a burden on your back or a heavy load debater. As you think about what you're feeling in your body when you're getting in tune with your inner voice, sometimes your body will play a part in that and bring your attention to a place where there might be tension or resistance or physical discomfort associated with particular idea. Likewise when you're entertaining an idea, that's really good for you. Sometimes it will help you to slow down your breathing. It will help you to calm down your body, and you will feel a sense of calm or even piece at times when you think about this idea. So pay attention to your body, and be careful not to over analyze when you're learning to pay attention to your inner voice. Lastly I would suggest getting really curious about ideas that come to you when you're getting in tune with your inner voice. You can imagine this like a conversation. Like on the one side, you're an observer patiently noticing your thoughts noticing your feelings and getting really curious about that. You can ask yourself questions. You can entertain possibilities and sort of have a back and forth conversation. Really be as objective as possible and explore fully any ideas that come to your mind. Now, let's talk about how you might apply things that you learn when you spend time reflecting on your inner voice and the thoughts that come to your mind. The first thing is. You may need to put these thoughts in a place where you can look over them regularly. And give you an example about this. I was incredibly stressed about something that occurred at the beginning of the pandemic, so people were buying out the stores. And I was almost compulsively going to the store every single day when the day started I mean it was probably early March and the pandemic was declared, and I just started to go from store to store to store looking for toilet paper, looking for canned foods looking for all kinds of things. I didn't really need these things, but I felt a sense of urgency and panic. I wasn't really sure that anything would ever return back to normal. I don't know if you've had a similar experience. But at the time it was like a crisis to me and I knew it was a little abnormal, but I wasn't sure how to call my feelings and thoughts about it. I thought about it. I read some things I tried to explore. Why am I feeling this sense of dread and panic and what it could do to calm it down? I reflected a lot on it. I prayed. I reflected meditated I did a lot of things. And one morning I awakened and a thought came to my mind, and it was a very clear thought about fear, power and sound thinking. Also thought about. The length of my life and the quality of my life. These thoughts were incredibly clear to me. And they came in the form of quotes from things I had read, so I wrote them down and highlighted them in my journal in Yellow. And several different days after that the moment I started to feel this fear and panic again, I was able to look on that page in my journal, and read it to myself, and instantly I felt calm again. It was very intuitive, very hopeful guidance. And it was clearly my inner voice speaking to me. Or as I feel it was the spirit guiding me. And it was very easy for me to tune into that again when I needed it. So if there are times when you feel a similar type of idea, come to you, that is calming comforting. Or maybe it's even idea pushing you in a particular direction. If you write it down and look over it again and again it can strengthen that thought in your mind, and it can give you real direction when you follow it. So that's my first tip about how to apply what you might learn when you listen to your inner voice. Secondly. I wouldn't expect my inner voice to tell me the same message over and over again. Really when I have a clear message in my mind and I write it down then. I feel that I have an obligation to act on what I am thinking or figure out what it means for me. If I set it aside and ignore it then I really am not encouraging myself to be in tune with that inner voice very well and I'm also likely to miss any guidance. I could find so I would suggest when you take it seriously and really learn things from your inner voice in these moments where you're going to pursue this to act on those things that you. Realize what comes to light for you and definitely expect to continue learning from your inner voice as you do. You'RE GONNA. Get better and better at hearing it. And take some time to reflect on what those thoughts lead for you. Did they help you with a direction? Did they come your fear about something? Did they give you confidence? And as you learn those things, you're going to get better and better. Hearing your inner voice. A third thing I'd like to suggest in applying this to your own life. Is when you have a very clear and distinct thought that feels right, intuitively good, and like a message to you and your mind, and you write it down, and you entertain it and you kind of think about it. Be Very careful not to share this thought with people who are going to poke holes in it quickly asking their permission to believe your own inner voice. When I was a younger person even in my thirties. I used to do this. I would have a clear distinct thought. And I would question it. I would ask my husband when he thought I, would ask my mother what she thought. I would ask my friends what they thought I would look up things from experts on the Internet, about what they thought I should do. And I was sort of set aside the inner voice with all sorts of questions in my mind. It wasn't until later when something might come to light. That made it really obvious that I had the answer. All along I delayed my choice and I made things more difficult for myself by putting it out there for all of these other people took question, poke holes in and push around. When the whole time my inner voice was meant for me. It wasn't meant for the other people. So when I would ask for their approval to take some action or to step forward in some direction, I was really telling my inner voice that I didn't trust it. So there is a time in a place where you might share things, but be careful not to share your inner thoughts as you're getting in touch with your inner voice with people who are likely to tear it down. It makes it incredibly hard to hear your own into it, if thinking and any other positive influences from the universe that you might be seeking. So write them down. Think about them. Take Action on those that makes sense for you and expect to continue learning and growing from the thoughts that you have. Thank you for joining me today I. Wish you all the best in applying what we've talked about hearing your inner voice and becoming the best version of view, this has been a podcast called mindset for life by Bethany Dr Biko. Dot Com to find me on the web. You can visit my blog or my website at www dot doctor be coached dot com. That's D R being. OVER ACH DOT COM!

US Bethany Dr Biko cramp Yellow
Ep. 45 - The Central Park 5

The Breakdown with Shaun King

12:58 min | 1 year ago

Ep. 45 - The Central Park 5

"In one thousand nine hundred eighty nine we didn't have net flicks abor diverse was just seventeen years old, and we didn't have Twitter, we didn't have Instagram. We didn't have Facebook. We didn't have items get have podcast. We didn't have iphones or androids. We didn't have the north or the breakdown and as New York City wrongfully, arrested charged, and convicted five young boys later known as the central park five as they arrested them for brutal rape, and assault that they had absolutely nothing to do with so many of the tools that we have today tools that we can fight back with it just didn't exist. But we have them now and today, I wanna tell you, how I think we should use them. Hope you watch when they see us on Netflix, then join our efforts to continue calling. For Justice for the central park, five. Listen. It's never too late to fight for what's right. People need to know that we're may do us wrong. We won't go quietly. Let's dig this is Shaun king. And you were listening to the, the breakdown. The brickner. Breakdown. In nineteen eighty nine I was just ten years old. And I was growing up in the deep south in a thousand miles north of me, young boys who are barely older than me, just babies were about to face the racist nexus of America's white power structure, and it would chew them up and spit them out now few documentaries have been filmed about these young boys and the injustices that they faced. But for the first time a well-funded well-crafted dramatic mini series of their stories of their pain of the oppression. They experienced end of their survival. All of that was just released and it's called when they see us and it's on net flicks right now, and I strongly recommend that you watch it and that you learn from it. Yes, it's pay. Painful, but it's also so beautiful because Eva diverse has told the story with the color the lighting the character, the nuance, the culture, the depth the pain the grief and the seriousness that it deserves. She gets the little things. Right. And it's almost as if she found a way to take us back in time, the acting the cinematography the script the story there all perfect, and for every second of this four, part series, you're going to get the feeling that every moment was done with great care and precision, normally, when our stories are told and I'm thinking of the movie cry freedom, which I still loved as a movie starring Denzel Washington as Steve Biko, the South African, intellectual and freedom fighter or. I think of almost or even the movie glory, which was about the fifty fourth regimen of the civil war. Most movies told about us are often told through the lens of a sympathetic white character so cry freedom, the movie about Steve Biko, instead of really being all about Steve Biko was really about a white journalist who covered him or almost odd instead of really telling the story of those enslaved Africans who revolted tells the story through the lens of the white people who eventually defended them, but that's not the case with when they see us Evo has told this story through the lens of the children to the lens of their parents and of their families in it's wild to say this, but that's new. It's part of the power really of Netflix, where they are not lording over every detail of how a script is written. They're not worried about white for Jila, or hoping that white people will pay to come see this. That's really changed. And she gets the space here to tell the story the way it deserves to be told. And in doing so something powerful as happened into illustrate what I'm about to break down. I wanna I play a twenty fourteen stand up clip of the comedian Hannibal boroughs. The Hannibal was in a random club in Philadelphia. And the clip is grainy and hard to see, but he starts telling a joke about Bill Cosby, and I when you hear it, you'll hear Hannibal mention how small Cosby is to the younger generation of black folk then burst takes his bit in a different direction that, shocks the audience. And it was this clip that went super viral because Hannibal Burruss while cash. -sually telling a joke about Cosby, really became the first person in pop culture to confront Cosby over the dozens and dozens of sexual assault allegations that had been hanging over his head for generation. Let me play the clip. And then I'll circle back this is. Hannibal. Burs. All night. People. Eighties. Bill. But yeah, you're right. Thank you say last. Himself. You wanna rape? What about Sal? I guess one of these making weird. Mold parts are puzzling of Ludd, outdone bills days empty worldly. They'll make it up. I bill. Bill out the laundry. No do. Of said, you didn't call. Trust you leave. Ashby. See timing is everything. See this was five years ago, and it's hard to believe because when bursts told that joke in and started going on Cosby, Bill, Cosby never been a trial. He had never been to jail and the stories of the fifty plus women who came out to accuse him of sexual assault in the seventies, eighties nineties and two thousands. Those stories had not been covered yet. But here's the thing, and this is how timing is powerful Cosby had actually admitted in several of his standup routines, from the seventies that he was using the date rape drug on women. But again, that was pre Twitter that was provided video that was pre trending topics and women across the years had accused him of sexual assault and he had settled many of those cases. But again, it was a different era where a few major newspapers and TV. Stations. They controlled everything that made the news and everything that didn't in suddenly one random stand up routine a grainy video from Hannibal Burruss, blew the lid off of the issue would Bill Cosby, and that's what a diversionary has done with this Netflix series on the central park, five people knew in the eighties that police em- prosecutors in Manhattan, railroad at these young boys, we knew that in the nineties, and we knew that their confessions were coerced and beaten out of them the city of New York settled, over forty million dollars for for the pain. They caused these young men that that knowledge was really gained in a different generation without the benefit of it being told the way able was able to tell it and today, I have just one action. Step for you, and then tomorrow, I'm gonna come back with part two of this mini series that we're going to do. All right. Let me share with you. Our action step for today. Stiff. This is simple. But also difficult. I need you to go ahead and watch when they see us on that flakes. And it is painful, and it is traumatic in difficult. But it is the story of survival. It is a story of our Justice system really are in Justice system and are primarily, I mean, there are many reasons why won't you to watch it. It's masterfully done, and it's a difficult story to do so. Well, the, the young boys and the entire cast are magnificent. But I particularly want you to experience the injustice. I want you to see and know the names and stories of the men and women who forced this injustice on the central park, five want you to see the role they played because we're going to push back, just as people did not fully understand who Bill Cosby was it didn't fully register resonate with us to Hannibal Burress told Joe, I feel the same thing about the central park five, we had an understanding, but this documentary has taken that understanding to a whole 'nother level. So today, I'm about to head to a protest that's related to the corrupt prosecutors in this case, and tomorrow, I'm going to tell you all about it until you how you can join me, but I need you to go ahead and start watching when they see us on net flicks, a right? Thank you. All of course, for making it all the way through this episode of the breakdown having already subscribe to our podcast. I asked every day because I do need you to subscribe. We'll be right back here every single day. And we'd love to subscribe on your favorite podcast app, like apple podcasts, or Spotify cast box or whatever it is, please, please share this podcast with your friends and family, because our next big goal is to get a hundred thousand subscribers. We're not going to get there without you have you left a review yet because an apple podcast. We have nearly eight thousand five star reviews, but we're aiming for ten thousand so we still want to hear from you, so please, please, please leave your best view when you get some time, of course. Thank you so much to the nearly thirty thousand founding members of the northstar whose generosity of mixed this podcast possible. We love and appreciate each of you. So very much, if you love this podcast, and you want to support our work, you want to see the show notes trance. Grips reach episode. We'd love it. If you'd consider becoming a founding member of our immunity, you can do that right now at the north star dot com. They were not only have our podcast. The we have hundreds of original articles and stories and commentaries from some of the leading scholars and thinkers and journalists in the world. Lastly, I wanna give a shout out to our associate producer signs are editor, Richard and our podcasting, director, and senior producer, Willis for their hard work on this, and every episode take care of.

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Episode 13: Ugly Club

This Is Love

29:38 min | 1 year ago

Episode 13: Ugly Club

"Support for this is love comes from progressive. One of the country's leading providers of auto insurance with progressive. Name your price tool. You say what kind of coverage you're looking for and how much you wanna pay and progressive will show you options that fit within your budget use the name your price tool and start an online quote today at progressive dot com. Price and coverage match limited by state law. It's not Biko. Well, how do you pronounce this town's name not PB go? It's Bill Biko peo- Bacau yet. We're less one. I've said again, I hope tell me about peo-. What is this town like PR Beka is magic down everyone in VR because is is feeling like he's in the play. He has to be. PO Paco is medieval Italian town tucked between two mountains and surrounded by waterfalls. And caves, it's a very small town two thousand people this has been a data Alloway. She was born and raised here. We really care about our town does everyone know each other. Yeah, we are two thousand people, and we know each other very well. We we really care about teach others life, and we tried to stay together. It's something that in because we really have this feeling about others. Even if you don't live in peo- beco- there's so much to like about it right away. This is sort of homemade looking peo-, but go sign perched up in the mountains their version of the Hollywood sign, and there is the food the two specialties one is polenta alla carbonara the polenta is cooked in a copper pot over woodfire and stirred by hand with a big wooden stick and the other is homemade pasta with fresh truffles. Do your the truffle, man. Yes. Hi. How are you lack can white truffles two of the hardest to find and most expensive things to eat anywhere in the world are naturally abundant here. What's your name? My name is Edison. And you how long have you been looking for truffles twenty five years ago? You started looking around this town robust, though. Yes. Start truffles grow completely underground and Alessandro uses dogs to help. Them figure out where they are. He digs them up and ships them all over the world. He says when he started out every household in town could have as many truffles as they wanted me says there were communist potatoes. But now the rest of the world is interested. He says truffles are expensive because they grow slowly. And they don't grow everywhere. The conditions have to be really specific and perfect. And even then you need a dog and a lot of patience to find them. Peo- Paco is very proud of their truffles not just because they're wonderful. But also because they're ugly in peo- beco- is a place where everyone wants to be ugly. I'm Phoebe judge. And this is love. I read somewhere that this town is the capital of ugly. Yeah. It is in this town in Bacau. We have the ugly club club. When you're driving into town. Even before you see a sign for the town. You see a sign that says club to Bruti the ugly club founded in eighteen seventy nine and at the beginning. It was. There were a lot of spinsters in Bacau. And so this club started in order to give husbands to this spinsters. It was like agency matrimony Allah like like, Tinder. In nineteen sixty the club shifted its focus to quote, make citizens aware of the problems of the ugly. And it was led by one man who kept getting reelected as the club's president year after year for thirty years. His name was the less photo Jakko bendy, but the nickname was Lilla and and everybody know him. Everybody knows him. He got something. He needs is in the way, he spoke in the way, he could create a very good atmosphere called himself, an ugly. Man, he wasn't happy with his knows what she said was too small. He often said he didn't have a problem with attractive people. He had a problem with the commodification of beauty, and it was lay who instituted the ugly. Club's motto ugliness is a virtue. Beauty is slavery. He loved Pio PICO and he loved PEO because truffles which he saw as kind of a metaphor truffles are the ugliest growth in the ground. He said, and yet they're so precious even an aphrodisiac nature is very honorable it gives other qualities to those of us who are ugly. That's why infield. People love each other because they learned to see a nut to judge people from the outside. But to understand the soul of everyone. The cops headquarters are in the center of town, a tiny room with stone walls, and a very old building their pictures of Layla and other club members everywhere. They also have a clubhouse which is really like a private bar few steps away where they meet whenever they can't to drink homemade wine. So what where are we now? This is that compete. They meet actually this is another import and hit water and is very beautiful. The owner of this places Luca and his brother, which is also a very important member of the club. But now he's not here because he's working is also the pharmacist of because and this is where we come every time, we have a meeting Amine meeting where we have to decide for organize and things like that. Or when we want to drink have body and relax. The club's patron is the mythological Volkan win Volkan was born he was so ugly. That is mother threw him over cliff. He fell down for a day and a night before eventually crashing into the ocean. He survived and grew up to be a talented blacksmith. He got so good. He was admitted to Mount Olympus where he married Venus goddess of love. The Italian writer Umberto eco as a book called on ugliness. He writes, beauty is in some ways. Boring. A beautiful object must always follow certain rules. Ugliness is unpredictable. Beauty is fine. Ugliness is infinite like God. president until his death in two thousand six the new president is Johnny Luigi. His nickname is LA Belva or the beast. He's won the last seven consecutive elections. Shaw. Louisi- Joanna Giannino. It failure short presented the clubbed able to the PR. Baker Bennett Atta is his daughter, and she helped us translate. When did you first become a member of the ugly club when they? That sort of Tatham member the club the brute elite Kaitadi Alicia, more or less. He became member. When he was fourteen years old was your father a member middle, Chico. Choopwa manned tissue. Are you proud are you happy to be working so closely with your daughter in the club, mushy, man, equivocal mckelway, the may appraisal. Lumpia Philip Assia force and also because it is a confirmation that I got the best from him. And he said, he's happy craziness. Is your mother a member of the club? Of course. My mother is a member of the club as member she's a proud member. And the proud wife we tell me what the criteria for being in the ugly club is what is the test. We have a card where there are different marks. It started with undefined and sufficient, medium, good, great and extraordinary. And of course, we talk about Agnes, not beauty nece. So if you are extrordinary admits that you are exerting every ugly. Would you give me the test? Of course, of course. Of course, if you want we can do it right now. Yes. In don't hold back. I mean, I would like to like a real critique here. Okay. With the president to do the ugliness evaluation men at least one counselor. This is pretty good because I have the president and. Counselor here who happens to be the president's daughter. So funny morla tests that are properly. Okay. When you just got could cause I concede step. So we need almost. Yes. We need your name and surname. So my first name is Phoebe. Okay. Judge John debt, really? Okay. And now we have to judge Gopal level to conceal your. Volume of poetry PB Phoebe Phoebe judge she resides. Laura dot to PB to even Belot on your beautiful woman. None proceeded acting to ask not possible to give you a higher so high my Mark she komo's divinity town. But you came from. Far far away are born. So the Mark for the president is good Bonna, berry Vostok opinion, very clearly. So I'm kind of in the middle. Yeah. I'm not in the meal. A more on the extra a little more than in the middle of. Thank you very much. I knew they were going to be easy on me to be polite. It's a strange experience to sit still and let strangers use report card to great how ugly you are. I shouldn't complain. My evaluation was basically private senior producer Nadya Wilson to stand and be evaluated by packed room of ugly club counselors. This is kind of a big deal. The president with the help of the cans lers. We'll judge your agonise simple. They took the job seriously and took their time looking at her and casting their votes out loud. One at a time. I got the demo shown shake own the president. Medio can die. Shoe is a is resort. Not always on there. So say, they clip the Bruti Evita that all unit Borna tacona. No request attest Aviv. Okay. And he just said the Niger wisdom from now on and Flor ever, you're part of this club. Bring this card with the pride and honor for forever for your life. Applause. I did. Do you have to be inducted in person? You know, no one can do this online. They have to be here in front of the president. Yes. It cannot happen online. They have to be present. Sometimes it happened that some people sent sent as letters and pa- greeted written by hand and with pictures inside because they really wanted to be part of the club in that case the wear so strongly. Willing to do this that we made an exception. And we did it but not online not online. We were eager to talk with as many members of the club as we could. And we learned that it's easy to find people to ask because everyone in the town is a member of the club, and they all have nicknames. Here's the club's vice president Matteo, his nickname is Gideon. Do you consider yourself a gli? Tonight that see. Misanthrope route sincere. Yes, I feel actually, but ultimately agonises subjective. Everyone can appreciate something about someone else. But those of us in the club, we feel really ugly way, MS frontier frontiers and. And. Partly liberty. I guess I have always felt ugly bitch. I never liked myself. I always said something that I didn't like about me. I don't look at myself in the mirror. Instead, I tried to focus on the way I relate to others when you do a lot of thinking opening your life. Francesco fiance is also a member of the ugly club vnc is my female for the copy. I started sentence, and she ends it. It's another thing to me. She's the most beautiful person into word, but other people might look at us and say they were both ugly really do care. We spoke to a younger club member named Frederico. He's twenty and he told us he remembers his grandfather taking him to the club's annual festival for ugly people when he was seven years old each year. Hundreds of people come together in peo- to cast their votes for the ugly club president there's a parade and music and everyone dresses up Frederico remembers his grandfather explaining to him what the ugly club means and ever since. Then he says his wanted to be a part of it. Everyone was excited for us to meet one man in particular. His name is Danielle and his nickname is the undertaker. On the taker that's the under the undertaker he's wearing a top hat. Here is pillow. Do you think your ugly? But mayor says he for me inorder not to be part of the ugly club. You have to be like, I don't know as and some as Brett beat or George Clooney. I do is you must be a part of the club. The undertaker told us many thinks he's actually gotten better looking since he joined the club. This is sort of a theme. We heard it more than once people in the ugly club feel better about themselves after joining the obviously like being together. It's sort of surprise ING to see a large group of adults all different ages and personalities completely at ease with each other. No one was being standoffish. No one was looking at their phones. Or maybe ugly club members feel better about themselves because the club is an explicit daily reminder to be kind to other people and to yourself. It's funny that this club exists in Italy. Why why do you say it's funny because I think that there's this idea that Italy is all about beauty. You know, the every it the food is beautiful. The scenery is beautiful. The people are beautiful the fashion is beauty. It's there isn't anything about Italy. That isn't beautiful. Yeah. Actually, it's true. But it doesn't mean that this is the only beauty, and we want to make everybody know that even if something is not beautiful, and it's not. Judged as beautiful. It doesn't mean. It isn't. We'll be right back. Support for this. As love comes from Robin, Robin Hood is an investing app lets you buy and sell stocks ATF's options in cryptocurrency while other brokerages charge up to ten dollars for every trade. Robinhood, doesn't charge commission fees c-can trade stocks and keep all of your prophets. Learn how to invest in the market. Discover new stocks track your favorite companies and get custom notifications for price movements. See never miss the right moment to invest Robin Hood is giving listeners. This is love a free stock like apple Ford or sprint to help you build your portfolio. Sign up at this is love dot robinhood dot com. Thanks to ever lane for their support ever lane makes premium a- central's the cost thirty to fifty percent less than what you pay traditional retailers almost all of my shirts from ever lane. Is specially like they're cotton crew t shirts, and they're relaxed linen shirts. They're comfortable they hold their shape. Well, and they look great no matter how many times you wash them ever lane has a new sneaker line called tread built from the most sustainable raw materials. Available to check out a curated collection. Go to ever lane dot com slash this is love plus get free shipping on your first order that's ever lane dot com slash this is love ever lane dot com slash this is love. Do you think that your ugly? I think oh. No, I don't think I'm Ali being part of the ugly club doesn't mean you have to be ugly. You have not to be beautiful outside in the outside. But you are part of the club. When you understand why you don't have to be beautiful. If you understand that you don't have to be beautiful. You have to accept yourself for what you are how you appear and you have to work on yourself in order to be a good person inside with both her mother and father in the ugly club Benedito grew up thinking about these things we heard this from other people too that when you grew up in peo- Bacau. This is just how things are Benedito says that meant a lot to her when she was a teenager. And I think that for a woman is also hotter than for a man. And I think that the aim of the ugly club and being part of it. Eat helps me a lot. It's something that helps. Children too. Because when you are young when your baby when you are a tiled, you it's difficult to understand that it's more than what people says about you. It doesn't. It's not what they say that make you the person you are. And so he helps a lot. And now, I really like myself, my personality, my appearance, and no, I don't think I'm Ali. She's twenty seven now and works with refugees, mostly women and children from Nigeria Iraq and Pakistan. There's a history of ugly clubs around the world. Dating back even earlier than this one. PO beco- in Liverpool. The most honorable and facetious society of ugly faces operated from seventeen forty three to seventeen fifty four. It was also known as he ugly face club. There Motta was before all things an ugly face only men were allowed to join. If they got married, they were kicked out records were kept of the members names and brief descriptions of their face, for example. John woods of Liverpool elected seventeen fifty one had quote a face altogether. Resembling a badger someone else was described as having a tongue like an anchovies. Here in the United States there records of ugly clubs on college campuses. There was one at the university of North Carolina dating back to eighteen thirty eight. But when you start looking into the history of ugly clubs, you pretty quickly come across so called ugly laws was that were on the books in various American cities all the way until the nineteen seventies Chicago's ugly law enacted in eighteen eighty one said that any person who was quote, diseased maimed mutilated or in any way deformed would be fined a dollar each time. They were seen in public. There are lots of articles and books written about beauty. But a lot less has been written about ugliness. And what there is points out. How often historically the word ugly has been code for disability. We care about this situation a lot we don't want this to happen. We want that every person who is different from another one. It means that has something to say, we can we can be all equal only if we are all different pupa coast, ugly club campaigns against workplace discrimination when they take care to respond to correspondence from people around the world who hear about the club and right in with their stories. You one of the work that we have to do right now is take these and catalog all the things because a grout. What does that letter? So okay. I thank you for the good thoughts and the teaching and maybe one day, we will see we will meet. And these from Ostuni. From nineteen eighty six. And sometimes been debt to says they still receive letters from people asking for help beating someone not long ago we received a letter. A we do. Wrote to my father the president that he was retiring now, and he was feeling a little lonely because he's wife passed away. But he was a good Bersin. And he wanted someone to spend the rest of his life with and so he asked the president to make him meet someone. We were so impressed by these. This latter because it's not so common. And so we we published it without the name. Of course, we there was also a picture we published it, and we we talk about this this case this person. And I think that he met actually woman I don't know if together now, but in some way, he got to know someone she says, you're welcome to write to them too. They're also on Facebook now. And if you wanna go visit peo- Pagot go in September. That's when the ugly festival takes place. The fall is also the best time of the year for truffles. There's a festival for that. To as Benedetta said, every occasion is an occasion to have parties. Eventually Benedetto's mother called an astern turn her father to come home who was her sister's birthday, and they needed help to make the polenta. Before we said goodbye, the club saying there anthem for is something that we have to do. The didn't do just do to stick together. You know? Protein corporate a lot. Trai? Lovie. All the fees. To be. Not good. With club uproot permission. He's created a special ugly club pin. Just for our listeners Weaver Lincoln the show nuts or you can just pick one up when you go to the club do Brucie's headquarters and peo-. This is love is created by Lawrence spor and me the Wilson is our senior producer audio mix by Michael Rayfield, and rob by special thanks to Nico Dasani Lindy Russell and Susanna Roberson. Julian Alexander makes original illustrations free episode of this is love you can see them at this is love podcast dot com. Where on Facebook and Twitter at this is love show. This is love is recorded in the studios of North Carolina public radio W UNC were proud member of radio Topi from PR a collection of the best podcasts around and we've a whole season of stories from Italy. Coming your way, stay tuned. We'll be back in a couple of weeks. I'm Phoebe judge. And this is love. Radio. Ex. Do you like it? Support for this. As love comes from progressive. One of the country's leading providers of auto insurance with progressive. Name your price tool. You say what kind of coverage you're looking for and how much you wanna pay and progressive will show you options that fit within your budget use the name your price tool and start an online quote today at progressive dot com. Price and coverage match limited by state law.

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56: How to Use Your Emotions and Make Decisions

Mindset for Life

17:08 min | 3 weeks ago

56: How to Use Your Emotions and Make Decisions

"This is episode number fifty six user emotions to make decisions Welcome to the mind set for life. Podcast this is bethany year coach from dr coach dot com coaching with power purpose and practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Welcome and thank you for joining me for today's podcast. I'm super thrilled. That you're here to talk about emotions and how to get clear and make decisions. Did you know many of us believe that emotions make things less clear. It's this idea that facts speak for themselves but emotions or more subjective in fact when we feel difficult emotions like about relationship of situation or a decision to be made. Its those feelings that keep us from knowing what we should do. It might surprise you to learn that we can actually use our emotions to get clear to make decisions instead of being stuck in them or feeling as if we're surrounded by fog today i'm going to share some ideas with you. That will help you out. You're going to get some insight about how to use your emotions to work for you instead of against you and you are going to get a great tip for bringing out your best emotions in situations where you want to feel your best how to emotions create mindset or how do they connect your mindset. Emotions actually are driven by the limbic system. In the brain we think with this higher level. Part of our brain more consciously intentionally emotions are just below that and often. They can filter what we're thinking. They can actually prompt us to think. In certain ways we might otherwise not think about and understanding and getting a hold of our emotions is critical to having good performance at work positive relationships in good thoughts about ourselves. Emotions are very connected to what we think and how we perceive everything around us. Each one of us has a system where we assume filter information process our experiences. It's so closely tied to emotion that many times. We're not really clear. That emotion is part of that experience for all of these reasons understanding your emotions connecting to them. Feeling them recognizing them clearly in interpreting what you're feeling. These are all critical to making great decisions in other words mindset is not about only thinking about the way you perceive everything in your experience including the emotional content as an educator for the past twenty five years and a certified professional coach. I'm passionate about helping people live and lead as the best versions of themselves. I'm all about helping you get clarity so that you can put good to the world so that you can have an impact in those things you do and be satisfied being who you are. So here's what we're gonna cover today. I what emotions do you feel most often second. How can you identify recognize and feel your emotions more clearly and why is it important to feel them rather than suppress them or stuff them. Third emotions give us helpful information and feedback about what's important to us. Think about your values and what matters to you in any given situation. And how can you use this to your advantage. And lastly you can slow down notice. What messages your emotions are sending you and what this means. For the decisions you're facing. How can you see this decision more clearly. So let's jump in i. What emotions do you feel. Most off emotion has been the subject of much research and some of this research indicates that people have a wide range of emotions and yet we don't really know how to identify them or exactly what we're experiencing when it's happening. There are a lot of reasons for this. I'll start with this one in the nineteen seventies. A psychologist named paul ekman identified basically six emotions that were universally experienced in all cultures and those word happiness. Sadness disgust fear surprise and anger. We all feel happiness to some degree. Surprise and of course. Fear makes a lot of sense and sadness disgust. Might be surprising to you. This is a universal emotion in most cultures and anger. Of course as well whether you believe these are primary emotions emotions you can easily generate or emotions is not really relevant. Important part is to realize that no matter where you live or what culture you're in these emotions are pretty common and universal at the same time. There are literally thousands of words in the english language alone for emotions all kinds of emotions that distinguish fine tuned differences in what someone is experiencing and feeling at any given moment even though that's the case there really are some pretty common emotions most of us feel and on the positive side that might be love forgiveness. Aw joy interest hope pride serenity contentment piece all of these positive emotions are things that people tend to say. They're seeking when they're looking for some positive part of their life when thinking about different kinds of emotions you can actually feel. There's a little bit of research about how many emotions you can really feel especially all at one time. There's an idea that there are really five categories to emotions and these are emotions like enjoyment and within that category. We feel happy com good etcetera. The second category would be types of sadness. Sadness despair discouragement. Disappointment those are all in that same category of sadness fear. Fear happens when you're being threatened or when your brain is sensing something important to you is being threatened than anger of course any type of injustice offense Blame accusation anger usually comes from those kinds of things and then discussed as mentioned before now among all these emotional studies. One particularly intrigues me. And that's a twenty fifteen study where there were over. Eleven thousand people monitored throughout the day in real time. They put a device on them that measured their emotional response. In in this study it was discovered that people had profoundly emotional experiences almost all the time during the day people experienced at least one motion ninety percent of the time and surprisingly the most frequent emotion joy right after that the next two emotions were love and eighty people actually had positive emotions two and a half times more often than they had negative emotions and they also experienced positive and negative emotions simultaneously. Pretty often. did you ever know that you could feel both positive and negative emotions at the time. This idea is a new one for me and also makes a lot of sense if we think about any experience where we had some intense emotion most of those experiences come with intensity positive hand intensely negative emotions much of those conflicting emotions that are happening at the same time. Come because of the thoughts were having maybe something great for us but it's actually not great for other people. During the pandemic in twenty twenty. Many people have had intensely positive experiences while others are suffering greatly in any positive experience. There's that thought well is it okay for me to be happy. Is it okay for me to be feeling this positive thing when so many people are suffering and so there's this huge amount of sadness despair guilt fear at the same time someone who's experiencing something profoundly negative could also be kind of happy that there's this ability to move on or see something around them that's bringing joy at the same time. It makes a lot of sense that we feel conflicting emotions at the same time. Emotions happen often. And if we're not aware of what our primary emotions are that we are feeling. It's a great opportunity to slow down and start to notice. How do you feel what are you feeling. Are you feeling more than one thing at a time. What is that and break it down and figure out what are your primary emotion. Some of the happiness research out there actually states that people have a default mode where we primarily feel the positive emotions over the negative emotions. So a great deal of the time. Our fallback emotion is a positive one. Basically are resting. State is happiness. This is a bit of a challenge for you in the coming week. Challenge you to observe to notice and to pay attention to which emotions you feel most often more regularly and just identify. What are your default mode emotions. And what comes most commonly to you now. We're going to move to the second part of our topic today which is how to identify. Recognize and feel your emotions. Why is it important to feel them instead of stuffing or suppressing them now as a professional coach. I've had a lot of people. Ask me how to control their emotions. But i've been surprised to find that. Some people want to learn how to stuff their emotions. They don't want to feel them. They want to disregard them. They'd like to get rid of them. Altogether in certain situations. This may sound a little strange to you. But i'll explain some of these situations one could be if you have to face someone who's really difficult and it brings with it some intense negative emotions pain suffering hurt heartache despair. If you have to experience someone that you know is difficult with you. It makes sense that at times you would not want to feel those painful emotions in the moment. Although i understand that and it makes a lot of sense is also a better experience for you to learn how to see that person differently. You can also focus on transforming the way you present yourself around a difficult person or how often you decide to experience that negative person in your life. there are so many ways that you can handle the negative experience. You have with a person who is difficult. I would suggest that it's more healthy to explore those options rather than stuffing or suppressing. Your emotions your emotions. Give you valuable information. They're helpful feedback when you learn to recognize them. Understand how you're feeling and while you're feeling it you can make much better decisions. That work for you instead of feeling like life is out of control in everyone else seems to be in control but you one way to learn to identify. Your emotions is to think about the way your body feels. Interestingly emotions are created by chemicals that rush through our body we have all kinds of hormones all kinds of chemicals. The brain generates signals those things move throughout her body. For example intense positive emotion is often associated with the chemical dopamine many people who become addicted to substances are looking for that positive rush or that positive energy. There are a lot of other things that caused negative. Emotions are things we might consider to be negative emotions again associated with some kind of chemical. That's functioning in the brain and then moves throughout the body. We can learn to identify our emotions better when we slow down and notice how our body is physically feeling. Do we have tension in the body. Are there places in the body that are tents. Do you feel emotion in a particular part of your body. I used to think that idea was kind of strange but now in several studies. They've figured out that you might feel emotions in your chest in your heart area or more in your shoulders and arms or in your brain section. You know part of your head. You might feel emotion in your torso. You might feel it in your hands or all over your body starting to notice what part of your body has a sensation. And what might that emotion be that is triggering that feeling the more you do this the more you can realize that you do experience a wide range of emotions and you can start to narrow down. What would you call. That emotion is an anger. Is it sadness. Grief disappointment joy happiness. All kinds of emotions are available to you and accessible to you. So identifying them determining weicker feeling them or what they're relating to is very helpful. Once you've started to identify there are many other researchers out there that will tell you that the emotion experience itself does not last very long. In fact dr rosenberg will tell you that it takes about ninety seconds for those emotions to pass through your body when you relive the experience by thinking about it again and experiencing it again in the brain then you are again feeling that emotion so it's about a ninety second experience to feel your emotions physically and if you will relax and feel that emotion it will pass and you can recover and move to the next thing especially if it is a negative emotion. And you don't really want to feel it. The key reason here about why it is so important to feel your emotions and acknowledge them rather than suppressing or stuffing them is that it can heighten your sensitivity to emotion. It can keep you open alert and aware of what you're feeling and it can help you generate useful information from your emotions about what you're thinking and help you understand what's important to you. Now that moves me to the third point today. Emotions gives helpful information and feedback about what's important to us. Think about your values. What do you care most about in life. You might have a different set of values in your personal life than you do at work. What you care most about it work. What do you value most in other people and in yourself your emotions give you information and feedback about what's going on in any given situation. Think about what matters most to you how you feel about things and why once you start to reflect on this and realize if you have an intense emotional about something it's giving you a message that it matters a lot to you you care about it and you really want to follow through or deal with a situation acknowledging that is very healthy and helps you stay in tune with who you are and what you think and feel. Lastly i recommend slowing down noticing. What messages your motions are sending you and deciding. What does it mean for the decisions. You're facing when you think about what your emotions are telling you. Interestingly enough. I've been in some workshops or read some things that talk about how your emotions can actually lie to you. This could be true because some emotions are triggered by the thoughts. Were thinking if we think something that we assume and it's not really true and the emotion follows it. The emotion might be based on a story that is not accurate so in some cases we're going to feel intense emotion that is based on presumption assumption. Stories that are just not fully developed when we notice our emotions and we realized what we're feeling sometimes it can actually give us the thought that we should step back and reexamined thinking for example if someone has offended us and we noticed that were angry. Hurt and upset. Those emotions can be a signal to us. We need more information. We need more understanding getting back to that. Twenty fifteen study. I shared with you earlier in those eleven thousand plus participants. They noticed positive. Emotions happened two point five times more often than negative emotions but they also noticed people experienced positive and negative emotions simultaneously relatively frequently. You know what that means. We have a choice in any given situation. If we're feeling both positive and negative emotions it's gonna be very difficult to figure out what we're really predominantly feeling so in some instances. We probably develop this filter where we choose the positive emotion or the negative emotion more often and we kind of walk away thinking yup. This is what. I'm feeling when really we've got a couple of things going on at one time. If the most common emotion people feel again based on research is joy and yet we're feeling negative. A great deal of the time that can be a red flag to us that it's time to go back to our thinking and examine how we're making our decisions and what emotions are likely feeling our direction if we notice it's primarily the negative emotions than we can go back and realize that's a filter and it might not be giving us the whole story to sum it all up. I've shared with you the important role emotions play in your life and why they matter so much in making decisions. I've noticed that many of the people. I've coached have spent a lifetime trying to push their emotions aside and wanting to escape them. This could be because emotions seemed to hijack us in the moment we struggle to control them but when we slow down notice what our emotions are really telling us and let them in. They can actually help us. See things more clearly revisit. Our thinking and make decisions that keep us aligned with who we really are and who we want to be. If now is the right time for you to learn how to use your strengths your values and your emotions to gain confidence and experience a transformation no matter how small visit me on my website. Dr be coach dot com. Although i have very limited openings right now for new clients i would love to help you. Take things forward in your life to the next level in your life your work and your relationships. Thanks for joining me today. You can find me on the web. At dr coach dot com and on my facebook business page listed as dr b h coach. This has been a podcast called mindset set for life by bethany at dr biko dot com to me on the web you can visit my blog or my website at www dot. Dr coach dot com. That's the are. Ach dot com.

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Attack on the National Palace in Guatemala - Oct. 19, 1944

This Day in History Class

07:49 min | 2 years ago

Attack on the National Palace in Guatemala - Oct. 19, 1944

"Hi, I'm Daniel and I'm more and we're here to tell you all about our brand new podcast. Daniel and Jorges explained the universe in this podcast. Gonna talk about a lot of things, mostly my physics and the universe in all those big mysteries scientists. A lot of things left to figure out even pretty basic stuff like what is space? What is time? What is stuff made out of which movie gets time travel. Right. That's an important question scientist. Are we alone in the universe? What is a black hole anyway, with inside a black hole, that's bad. It's mostly me and hor horrific on stuff. We find fun and fascinating and hilarious. Look for Daniela more, hey, explained the universe. We'll try to cover just about everything in the universe, everything every dollar shebang. The whole shebang from cats do planets to black holes and tiny parties. Welcome to the stay in history class from how stuff works dot com. And from the desk of stuff you missed in history class. It's the show where we explore the past one day at a time with a quick look at what happened today in history. Hello and welcome to the podcast. I'm Tracy v Wilson and effect Tober nineteenth members of the military attack the national palace in Guatemala on this stay in nineteen forty four during the Guatemalan, it revolution. This revolution had started earlier in nineteen forty, four as students and young military officers rose up against president hor hate Biko. He had been elected president in nineteen thirty one and his early presidency had included a campaign against government corruption improvements to public health, an overhaul of Guatemala's infrastructure and helping to stabilize the country's economy, but by nineteen forty four. He had gotten rid of all political opposition and he was governing as a military dictator, his policies that also increasingly favored elite landowners and corporations, especially the US based United fruit company, which owned a lot of the land in Guatemala. It wasn't actually using most of that land beginning. It wasn't available for anyone else to use either. He had also implemented things like decree eighteen sixteen, which exempted landowners from prosecution, if they used violence to defend their land up to including murdering someone, he could also abolished a series of forced labor laws, but then replaced them with vagrancy laws that were very similar in these really amounted to indentured servitude in a lot of cases, the so-called vagrants who were being forced to work. We're from Guatemala. Maya peoples. UB coup also developed close ties with the United States in the United States was providing Guatemala with armaments and with favorable tariff terms. This whole situation though was not unique at all to Guatemala other nations and Central America had various similarly, unyielding dictators and control with similar social and economic effects. Similar reliance on one food crop for. Most of the economy similar connections to the United States and United States based business interests and one dictator. Maximiliano as Martinez was overthrown in neighboring El Salvador in nineteen forty four. This overthrow became an inspiration for a similar campaign against you. Biko Ingui Tamala not just inspiring the students and other young people to rise up, but also inspiring in Ugo a fear that the same thing might happen to him. So he cracked down on civil liberties. He put people who were loyal to him in charge of the university. He basically tried to do what he could to ensure his own power. This had the opposite effect of what he wanted a series of protests followed with students at Saint Carlos university petitioning for changes to the university teaching staff and other reforms. Lawyers were petitioning for biased judges to be removed from the bench. Teachers were demonstrating for pay increases and. All these initial demonstrations were non violent. They included things like boycotts and strikes. The Guatemalan government responded to all this by deploying tanks and troops and using tear gas on the demonstrators placing the capital under martial law. But the demonstrations spread even as the government was placing participants under surveillance and deporting foreign supporters of the movement. Finally, at the end of June, tens of thousands of demonstrators were gathered at the capitol and Biko's support was really eroding. He resigned on July first nineteen forty, four place to the government under the control of military triumvirate. Although he allegedly remained in charge. The national assembly elected one of the triumvirate general Frederico Ponte Vitus president. He promised to their free election was going to follow, but by October, it was obvious that it just was not going to happen and Wata Malla was sliding farther and farther away from democracy. The protests continued students and teachers called for a general strike. On October sixteenth students and members of the military began taking control of the capital on October eighteenth, and there was an attack on the national palace by members of the military. As I said, at the top of the show on October nineteenth, violence spread through the capital the presidential guard rebelled and the general finally surrendered on the twentieth this didn't put a total into the violence or the rest. But new elections did follow in December and they were one of the freest elections that Guatemala had seen in decades. A new constitution was drafted in nineteen forty five. This constitutional rule lasted for just less than a decade before president Cobo Arbenz was elected in nineteen fifty one, and he had been part of the revolution. He instituted a lot of land reforms including redistributed. A lot of that unused land that United fruit company had been buying up the United States in the like that the United States was. Also threatened by the fact that he legalized the communist party in Guatemala. So so the CIA helped overthrow the democratically elected government of quantum Allah and nineteen fifty four. Thanks to Jeffcoat for her research work on today's podcast and tar Harrison for audio work on this show. You can subscribe to this day in history class at apple podcast, Google podcast, and wherever you get your podcast contune in tomorrow for a political purge. Over three hundred twenty five years ago, the community of Salem, Massachusetts was rocked by something few ever thought possible. It's been called an outbreak a wave of hysteria or the perfect storm at the confluence of seemingly unrelated ideas, events, and beliefs, whatever we try to call it though we always seem to miss the Mark. What bothers me so much so many people say how ignorant people were back. Then that's historian Emerson, Baker professor of American history at Salem state university. How could they possibly believe in witches and that they were? Well, I remember in sixteen ninety two which were real. Everybody believed in university ministers, doctors of theology, governors pope's, which are real. The Salem, witch trials are equal parts universally known and barely understood by most people. That's why this series exists new episode. Of this twelve part series air every Wednesday, learn more and find links to subscribe over at history on obscured dot com.

Guatemala United States president Biko Ingui Tamala Guatemala United fruit company Salem Daniel scientist Jorges Salem state university Frederico Ponte Vitus Guatemalan government Daniela Central America UB Wata Malla CIA Saint Carlos university
Managing Unmet Expectations

Mindset for Life

18:53 min | 9 months ago

Managing Unmet Expectations

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethany your coach from Dr. Be Coach Dot Com coaching with power purpose practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Hello there and thank you for joining me for the podcast today. I'm excited to speak with you about this idea of expectations or going to talk about expectations how expectations affect us and what to do with unmet expectations, expectations are always focused on the future. You might say that expectations are a type of anticipation. They may or may not be realistic when something is uncertain, it is what we think is most likely to happen I'll give you an example here. Perhaps somebody expects to achieve a certain goal. Maybe they run every day, and at some point they expect to achieve a certain speed or be able to run a certain length without getting. Getting tired, or maybe someone expects another person to do something or behave in a certain way. These are totally normal expectations that we have all the time, and some people would say and I might be one of them that when we have expectations of other people beyond our control, that's when we get ourselves into disappointment and trouble, but we can also have disappointment and trouble when we have expectations of the world around us things that we cannot control, but that we maybe take for granted another word for expectation is belief. Here's an example because things have been a certain way in the past. I believe they'll continue to be that way for example. I've always been able to go down to the store and buy toilet paper with no problem I assume it's available at the store, so I expect that I can just go to the store anytime. I run out of toilet paper and buy it well. If you're involved in the pandemic right now, you know that's not always the case. In fact, the very first day after the pandemic was declared I found that the entire warehouse sized grocery store had absolutely no paper products of any kind. It was quite a shock to me. Children go to school. We expect them to go to school for years and years, we might have had a pattern of children going off to school every day and coming home, playing with their friends doing homework, or whatever that's another expectation people just have, and in the current world we live in. That is not an expectation that is reasonable, because many people are staying home. Schools are canceled we. We might be doing our schooling by computer, and so forth so expectations can be something that we just believe and take for granted for a long time, or they can be unique to a certain situation. And when they are met, they can affect us a certain way. Having the expectation at all can mean that we plan our entire life around that or we plan our assumptions and beliefs. Beliefs around it about other things in life we take it for granted, and we expect our happiness to hinge on whether our expectations are not met I'd like to tell a little bit of a story here about a game. My sister and I used to play when we were children. My sister is three years older than me as you might imagine. She was of course wiser during this. This game and this game would involve getting out various things from the refrigerator, putting these things into little bowls, and it might be things like up, mustard, barbecue, sauce, apple, sauce, etc, we would maybe gathered ten to fifteen different things. Different flavors in this game and one person would be in charge of using the tasting foods and dishing them up in the other person would be completely blindfolded. So that first person would be saying. Open your mouth and close your eyes, and I will give you a big surprise, and then the blindfolded person would have to open their mouth. The other person would put a sample of one of the food into their mouth, and that second person would have to guess what they were tasting now. If you're visualizing a couple of young kids playing this game, putting different kinds of crazy fades in each other's mouths, you'd be right when you think that. Perhaps there was a little foul play in there occasionally I think the actual point of this. This game was to abandon all expectation to stop having an expectation of a certain flavor or a certain texture in the mouth, but to set aside expectation, and just go with whatever that was so that you're open to really guessing what it is as you might imagine. Sometimes, the taste was quite unexpected. Maybe it was startling because it was bitter or tart like lemon juice, or maybe it was spicy like hot sauce or salsa throughout this game, it was kind of like trying to set aside those expectations, so there was a blank slate to figure out what was in the. The mouth, some people would not like a game like this, and as I reflect back. I'm not really sure I did either being the younger child I probably ended up tasting some foods. I would not have chosen for myself, but he gave us the opportunity to us census to figure something out, play a game and try to set those expectations aside now if you don't have expectations in life of situations or other people that would be a boring life. I think we all have expectations. In fact, it's normal if you think about the fact that another word for expectation is. Is Belief and its future focused. We've probably have a huge amount of expectations and belief that we place on other people ourselves, our circumstances, our environment, the world around us, and the odd really so expectations are completely normal, and usually we base them on some degree of fact or a reason to believe something like in the game I mentioned where we would be tasting. Different foods blindfolded. We knew what was in the fridge. So within reasonable range of things we probably had somewhat of a pallet to guess from. At least it wasn't going to be some random dirt or something. We did not do that to each other. We had some degree of trust at least that kept us in the safe zone. Expectations normally are within the realm of possibility. We have reason to believe it's possible. So how do expectations affect us? Now? On the one side, expectations can help us get excited. They can help us ramp up towards progress activity action towards a goal and so forth. Can. What happens in our lives to actually create the results were looking for. Here's an example. If I get a job that pays money I can reasonably expect to earn some kind of paycheck so when I go to work every day and do the work. I can put my best effort into that and expect to get a reward. I'M GONNA. Get paid for the. The work I do my children expect that I'm probably going to buy food cook a meal. Take care of their eating needs at least once a day, so I decided to do that and if I'm not gonNA make meal, all have things on hand that they can get for themselves, and they can take care of it at Christmas time if a child. Child believes in Santa Claus and thinks that they will receive a stocking full of coal for misbehavior than they will try harder to stay off the naughty list, and they'll try harder to stay on the nice list, so they can get treats if I want to save up money to go on a vacation to Hawaii and I believe that by putting money. Money in a savings account, I will eventually collect all the money that I need to go on that trip and I've saved it all up and I have been able to collect it all in that savings account perhaps with a little bit of interest, I can reasonably expect to accumulate my savings there and pay for my entire Hawaii vacation at some point. With this station I might even start to visualize myself going on the airplane, I might dream about sitting on the beach and seeing the palm trees I might think about going to a Luau seeing pineapple at a buffet meal. All of those things are completely reasonable. If my plan is to go to Hawaii and I've scoped it out, and I'm starting to put money towards that plan and progressively. I'm building up towards this trip and when eventually buy the ticket and go on the trip and get on the plane. That says it's going to Hawaii. Then I can expect that I'm going to get off the plane and Hawaii. I can probably also believe that I'm going to have some good feelings on that trip, because I've been thinking about it saving for it, and planning for it and I'll do what I need to. So I can be prepared to go on the trip, and so that the good feelings will actually happen, and if something goes wrong on that trip, just a little thing here and there I'm probably going to do whatever I can to influence that result. Make it the best trip that I can. So I'm going to really put the effort into making that outcome possible, so we make decisions based on what other people expect of us. We expect of us, or we expect to have happened. In other words, we will rise to meet our own expectations. We will do those things to create the results we want, or people will rise to meet our expectations within reason likewise if we don't believe somebody is very capable or very smart, and we let them know often they will underperform because they don't believe that that we believe in them, and they will meet those expectations, too so higher or lower expectations tend to be fulfilled. We can go forward looking for evidence that we. We expect something to happen and it is actually going to happen so the whole time that I'm collecting my plans for Christmas time. If I'm a child I'm looking for evidence. That may be Santa Claus exists I'm watching other children to see. Are they behaving or misbehaving? I'm watching the television to see. Are there messages about Naughty and Nice? Do My parents talk about it and I'm kind of looking for this evidence during childhood one year I. Thought I had it all figured. Figured out what was going on with Santa Claus, so I, created a little autograph sheet, and I set out this table with cookies and milk and I asked Santa Claus to sign his name so that I could know for sure who it was and Santa Claus did sign his name. It looked suspiciously like my father's handwriting. I was pretty sure it might not actually have been Santa Claus. We look for that evidence. Right to meet our expectations or adjust our expectations right now the. The world is in a pandemic, and it's very difficult for people to have expectations things that we took for granted that were expectations. Now are questioning those things, and we might be questioning our expectations of ourselves can get out of bed at the same time every day. Can we be cheerful every day? Can we stay healthy? Are we going to get sick? Can we reasonably do our job at home? What can we expect of other people? Can we expect our children to behave? Our spouse to show up a certain way. Expectations are being challenged right now, and if we're not are already very familiar with unmet expectations, we are becoming familiar with unmet expectations when expectations are not met that we have reasonably built for ourselves these lead to dealings of disappointment. We thought something was going to happen in. It didn't am I example of going to Hawaii after saving planning preparing and expecting to go to Hawaii. What would happen to my expectations if I go on that trip and the airplane lands, and I get off at the airport only to figure out. We are instead in act, article and I'M GONNA be there for an entire week with no way to. To get out except to be an Antarctica for week until that plane comes back now that would be a shocking unmet expectation and I don't think my tanning lotion and my shorts and my swimsuit are gonNA work in Antarctica. I'M GONNA. Think I should have expected a potential change right? Unmet expectations naturally bring feelings of disappointment. We thought something would happen. And it did not, and we mentally prepared for what we thought about, but we are left instead with a sense of loss emptiness, even perhaps grief. Due to the result, we did not think about, but that we actually got instead now we were not expecting Hawaii and we went to Antarctica and we were kind of. Possibility we might actually still enjoy the trip. We might even be closely surprised, but as with most things in life. Usually we have Armand made up about a certain expectation. Now it's been my experience, and my intuition tells me that in terms of people in relationships, one of the biggest damaging things in a relationship is when we approached that relationship with expectations of how other persons should act or should think or should react expectations about what they might think and feel or expectations about what they will do. Do whenever we bring expectations toward another person especially if we don't share them out loud most of the time, we're going to be disappointed because we've imagined this potential reality. That doesn't come to pass. Even if the person were closely measure up or or do some of what we were expecting chances are. There's no way they could please us if our expectations are in our brain, and we've never brought them out to the light to share them, and especially if they're based on our own life, experience not. Not the person's life, experience or background we can gather all kinds of evidence to build expectations for things, but in terms of other people it's so much better for us so much easier to be pleased with the way other people behave and think and treat us if we bring no expectations into that situation so I'm gonNA. Give you five ideas that will help you with unmet expectations, or maybe even adjusting expectations especially right now. When we're faced with a pandemic, that is quite devastating and difficult for everyone. Everyone and even raising a bit of chaos and contention around us, the first thing is think about not just bouncing forward when an expectation is unmet, trying on two or three different possibilities of alternative outcomes and moving onto one. That looks better might be home a lot more. Maybe we're not working. Maybe we're working remotely from home and there could be a better way to do something then what we have done in the past, so we might be able to kind of brainstorm a potential outcome for. For our current situation and move forward in that idea. Do we want to move our career online and just be there for while see what happens with that? There's one option is look for what we might call greener pastures or better outcomes and start taking steps wanted time towards something better. A second thing would be to reflect. Look back at ourselves. Look back at our situations and consider what has led up to our expectations, and maybe whether we ought to question our expectations. Maybe open them up to. To other possibilities, and just really see and take a wait and see approach and live in the now the best we can, but really not expect some massive significant thing in front of us in the future do the best we can in the present moment, and be aware of the present moment be aware of the people around us. A lot of people refer to this as being mindful thinking about what's happening right now for us both the positive and the less positive and really reflect on what's gotten. Gotten us to this point what it means to us deep dive into the meaning of it all for the moment, the third possibility is to think about the difference between our circle, of control and everything outside of our circle of control the things that we think and feel and do our with an arc control, but all the rest of it, including the people in our family think and feel, and do is absolutely outside of our control, even with children and spouses. We can have an influence we can. Can make requests, but we cannot control other people so remembering that we're in control of many things, but not everything and be very relaxing and relieving in terms of unmet expectations of fourth thing is to set realistic goals and expectations from this point forward into the future. As I mentioned much earlier in this podcast, we would not be human beings if we went around with no expectations at all, we have tons of expectations that we think about for ourselves for other people and for situations generally speaking. So as we set those expectations them realistic and reasonable will really help us to be satisfied with whatever comes our way and pleased with some progress with some outcomes and also acceptance of others. And then lastly I think the most helpful thing at least for me is to think that we can accept the fact that some things are not going to happen the way we want them to. And that it's okay something that might feel negative seem negative seem to hurt us might be the very thing we need as preparation for a future time, so it just might be that right now. We're living in. In a moment that is the perfect preparation for the next step in our life as number five I would invite you to consider that possibility that meaning can be found in in the moment right now, and even with unmet expectations in the present we can use the present time to craft this sense that maybe this can be a preparation, and we might not know what to expect yet, but sort remain open. Open to that and use it as a preparation for several possibilities. Once we get into that mode, it might even be kind of fun and exciting to brainstorm a lot of possibilities that could come out of this. I've heard many people saying that one of the possibilities coming out of this pandemic where they're at home. Kind of secluded from other people is that they might spend a lot less time on technology. Technology! Maybe they'll spend a lot more time outdoors. Maybe they'll spend a lot more time with other people in the future when they have that opportunity to do it again, so brainstorming, those possibilities of what new reality might come out of this preparation period is another great way to handle unmet expectations, and lastly there are emotions that come with all of these things right anytime. We have an expectation that is fulfilled. Even better than we thought it would be. It can bring happiness satisfaction, joy, all kinds of good positive feelings that fill up, and likewise when our expectations are halted, paused cutoff or totally stifled. We can have feelings of grief loss despair, and it's okay to have those feelings and acknowledged that it's okay to kind of step back and pause, and just he'll for a little while while trying to adjust to take the next step forward. Thanks for being with me today as you think about expectations in your. Your own life and your current situation I hope that you will find some help in these tips that I've shared with you and I. Wish you all the best in the current situation and beyond here's to being the best version of you. This has been a podcast called mindset for life by Bethany at Dr Biko Dot Com to me on the web. You can visit my blog or my website at www dot, doctor coach, Dot Com. That's D R Being C. O. A. C. H. DOT COM.

Hawaii Antarctica Dr Biko Dot Com O. A. C. Armand three years one year milk
#53: A Mindset to Create

Mindset for Life

20:04 min | 2 months ago

#53: A Mindset to Create

"This is episode number fifty. Three a mindset to create. Welcome to the mind set for life. Podcast this is bethany year coach from dr coach dot com coaching power. Purpose and practical tools to help you show with confidence. Hello there and welcome to mind set for life if you're new year i'd like to say welcome and thanks so much for listening. This is doctor. Bethany hanson. I also have a podcast called the online teaching lounge which specializes in online teaching. But this podcast is specifically about you and your mindset and if you're interested in thinking about the way you think and having a different experience in life i'm your girl we're gonna talk about different things in this podcast like what we think about other people what we think about ourselves how to let go of drama had and navigate relationships how to build confidence and grow your motivation a little bit more how to tackle your work duties with increased focus and purpose. There are so many topics we've covered in the last year as we do episode fifty three today. Were putting this out. There were starting the second year of this podcast. And i personally am celebrating the fact that this podcast has been here for an entire year. If you're a regular listener. I just wanna say thank you for joining me for exploring mindset with me and taking the big journey or the big leap. I should say into south growth self development self improvement and focusing on what you can control and letting go of what others can control today. We're gonna talk about a mindset to create now a lot of the things we do in the world are reactionary. Things come at us. We feel like we're pushing them off or resisting them or trying to defend ourselves against a lot of things that come at us when in reality we are actually creating quite a bit of our own experience. One of the ways we create. Our experience is through telling stories. You know i have an episode called. We are all excellent storytellers. If you're interested in diving more deeply into stories. I highly recommend checking it out today. I wanna talk about the way we tell the story the automatic thoughts we have the way we feel about it and what we can do the way we tell the story. When we're thinking about creating this is going to be a storytelling moment. right now. And i'm gonna talk about this very podcast. Every time i think about creating an episode for the podcast i think about a big idea. Something that has influenced my life. Positively something. I might want to share with other people and then i'll outline it and i'll come up with points that would be most useful to you. Usually some kind of story that will go with it to make it memorable and i will create that episode. Reduce it on my software. Put it on my website and then it will be distributed through the various networks. Where you're listening to it. A lot of people have asked me how to create a podcast in creating your own podcast really. There are just a few things. One of the things that is important to remember is that everyone has their own inner thoughts that are fighting them for success. It doesn't really matter what you're creating whether it's a podcast or something else. You might be sewing a halloween costume for a child. You might be creating a clean yard where you're trimming the shrubbery or pulling weeds. You might be creating Growth in other people may be you teach or train others. Maybe you go to work every day and you do a fantastic job and you're creating excellence. Whatever you're doing to create the wide range of things can be likened to this idea of the podcast now. We import everything with some kind of inner thought. What we're assuming about ourselves what we're assuming about the situation what we expect to have happen and a lot of times. It's our inner assumptions and beliefs or expectations about what we're creating that actually determine our happiness with the end result. Now in creating a podcast. A lot of people have shared their ideas with me. And i reflected on my own ideas as well and these are some of the normal thoughts people have when they consider creating a podcast. I someone worries that their ideas are not interesting enough to share. Well we all have our own unique ideas and we can learn something from literally everyone on this planet so certainly your unique. And you definitely have ideas worth sharing a second concern. Someone might have when thinking about creating this content is the content is not useful. It's easy to change that. If we decide well what would make the content useful. What is the content need to be more useful. All we have to do is add the application piece. Like here's how to apply to your life or here's how to apply it to your business and when you think about creating anything else maybe something. That's not a podcast. Chances are there's use in it. Even if that use is beauty to please the eye and tear the heart. There is great use in just about everything we could possibly create again in creating a podcast. Many people will say but my voice is flat or bland. There are certainly a lot of tips and strategies out there. Youtube videos other podcasts. Where people give tips about how to make your voice sound more interesting. There's a lot of processing that can be done. You can really add filters and things to make your voice more full more rich and you can hear your tone if you listen to other people's podcasts. You can figure out how to make your voice more interesting less flat and less planned another worry. Someone might have when thinking about creating a podcast. Is i have to record it in a total quiet space or is going to have bad quality and i can't think of anywhere in my life. That is ever totally quiet. There might be airplanes flying overhead. There might be other people in the house making a noise. Maybe there's an air conditioning or heating system. That makes a loud sound whenever there is an idea that there's some kind of thing holding you back that's beyond your control. It is impossible to overcome until you take control of that situation so when you think about needing to record it in a totally quiet space i'll just make some suggestions here about podcasting. I ever recorded podcast in my closet surrounded by close to buffer the sound. I have recorded podcasts. In my office on a variety of systems an iphone zoom recorder. And also the blue yeti mike. I have recorded podcast in my car in in a secluded space in a parking lot at a walmart. I've recorded podcasts. In a lot of locations. I can agree that there are some places more ideal than others but generally speaking recording a podcast is part of the job and then the processing afterward is the next part when you process your podcast. It's very easy to remove background noise or quiet. Little sounds and some things can also be edited out so having this believe that you have to record it in. Total quiet is not necessarily true. I have colleagues who also create podcasts. And some of them have sound foam. Things like egg carton looking stuff on their walls. You can also buy those kind of foam diffusers which cut down on all the noise. If you're really interested. I personally don't use one but i highly recommend them for others if you're interested because i do hear that they work and in the past. When i was a band director. I studied acoustics. Also the sound diffusing properties of various band room structures material put on the wall hang from the ceiling and i can agree that some of those foam diffusing things would be great another concern. Someone might have when thinking about creating is that no one else will care about it specifically when thinking about a podcast if your concern is that no one will listen to it. That is probably true if you don't get it out there now if you start distributing your podcast and you put it out there regularly. Chances are people will listen to it and someone will find value in and they will return and listen to it again and again there are people out there just waiting to hear your voice they wanna know what you have to say what you can tell them about life the universe and everything. They'd really like to be part of your world another concern. Somebody has about creating a podcast. Is that people will pretend to like it. But in italy or behind your back. They're laughing at you and you don't realize how silly or ridiculous you actually sound now. That is probably a very normal thought. That many people have when they start out with something like a podcast or a youtube channel. Or anything where you're going to be up there out in the world and on the internet now what if you just flip that around and decide guess what there are always people who will pretend. That is not your problem. That's their problem. And of course if they are inwardly are behind your back laughing at you. That's also their choice not yours. That's literally something you can never control. There will always be people out there who reject you always be people who judge you. There will be many people who do not like what you're doing. You don't always get to know that they think these things and that's okay. Chances are you don't sound silly and ridiculous in fact if someone is resisting you and ridiculing you. It's probably because you're doing something great out there. You're being brave. And they are not having confidence stepping forward and being brave so it's very easy to criticize the person who is not up there on the stage and it is really easy to make fun or laugh or find reasons to pick but that is not an indication of your success or your quality. Even so that kind of idea will happen. Let's just assume that's going to happen. Another thought someone might have when thinking about creating is. If i really knew what i was doing. I'd have a bigger audience. Everyone thinks this. Do you know how many thousands or millions of podcasts there are in the universe out there. There are so many podcasts and everyone would love to have a huge. There are a lot of wasted. Grow your audience. you can create ads. You can share your podcast with affiliates. You can have another company publish it that also sponsors it and get it on their website. You can do all kinds of things to try to grow your podcast and you may grow your audience over time. But the best thing you could possibly do is to put at consistent episodes you want to put out. Consistent episodes weekly monthly regularly whatever. Your cadence is going to be so whatever you decide about creating you need to stick to that decision. And then lastly i don't know how to organize it. Well that too can be solved. You get to decide what the organization is you get to decide. Are you going to go it solo like i do. Are you going to interview someone else. Like a lot of people do. Are you going to have a story to tell. Will you have key points or takeaways at the end. All of that structure is totally up to you. There's no right or wrong. Answer now if i were to compare this to anything else in life. Let's just pick one and all choose sewing sewing is a hobby where you can create your own clothing. Your own stuffed animals covers for your appliance curtains. Whatever you want to create you take fabric thread and various things and and you're going to so these things together likely using a pattern of some kind and it's going to create this lovely thing in the end that you can use where i know how to sew and i do so and so regularly but someone who doesn't know how would need to learn not just the methods but how to read a pattern creating a podcast doesn't necessarily have a pattern. You decide what the patterns going to be if you're going to create other things. Sometimes there is a pattern and then the creativity is in how you put it together as you think about creating something in a mindset to create the first big idea. Is that what you're going to do is going to be utterly unique to you. You are totally unique. Your unlike anyone else in this universe. Sure you might have your dad's your mother's smile. Your uncle jim sense of humor. But you are one of a kind. No one can ever replace you. Your strengths are unique. The values you hold are unique the talents you have everything about you is unique and one of the greatest drives we have as human beings is to create something and share it so others can enjoy it too as you think about creating in the coming week. Think about what you want to also do in the coming year. It's not too soon to be thinking about twenty twenty one and all those things that you could create with that year. Yes the world's falling down around us at times and there's a lot of crazy chaos out there but we can control what we think what we feel and what we create so as promised. We talked about the way we tell the story. We also hinted around a little bit about automatic thoughts that we have and the automatic thoughts that we have really are those things that come after we tell the story. So if you're telling a story about creating but thinking that it's not going to be good enough. You're not a qualified person. People will judge it or there's something else wrong with it. Chances are there's a thought behind that that's going to follow for example. If your thought is that other people are in control and you really just don't have what it takes to create chances. Are you're gonna think that it's it's scary. You're going to feel embarrassed. Worried afraid hopeless. Maybe even have oversensitive feelings about it. Maybe low self esteem and pretty much. You're going to have a lot of examples from your past about things you've done where you've also failed or maybe where you did feel that you looked bad or people made fun of you. Whatever it is. Let go of those things you can start thinking about. The future. even look at past experiences for their positives. What was it that you got out of that past experience that actually contributed to your value. Now that create more within you that tapped into your gifts and talents to persevere to overcome and become a stronger person that you are right now as you think about automatic thoughts that you have you can definitely control what you do with those past thoughts but also the future thoughts so think about the automatic thinking. That's going on behind the scenes as you're telling the story next you want to think about how you feel about things you create or about the idea of creating does the process really excite you. I personally really enjoy the process of creating a podcast. I also create some stuff. When i'm sewing or maybe i'm decorating cakes or baking christmas cookies. I like to do that every year. Whatever it is. I'm creating. i really love the process itself. The outcome is great too but when the outcome is available i'm done. The project is finished so the process is super important to me. I want to enjoy the process and have a lot of fun along the way while i'm doing it think about how you feel about creating do you enjoy it. Do you get frustrated. Do us hit a wall. Do you ask people for help. Whatever you feel. It's likely coming from one of those automatic thoughts you're thinking about whether or not you're in control or whether or not other people's opinions matter about what you're doing. Lastly think about what you can do. One thing is to treat yourself. Well if someone around you was creating something new likely you would probably encourage them and give them a lot of cheering when they actually put it out there. Treat yourself the way you treat other people. You don't have unreasonable expectations with other people so often as you might with yourself. Many people are self critical or criticize themselves in their efforts inside. And maybe you might give feedback to other people as well but not necessarily in as critical of a manner or with such unreasonable expectations. So forgive yourself. Give yourself a lot of cheering a lot of support and encouragement on a lot of grace. As you're in the creative process you are basically a system of internal thoughts external comments and relationships with other people. When you think about yourself yourself with other people and yourself with your bigger community think about consistently speaking well about yourself in all of those places both internally in your thoughts and also your outer world. I think if you try that you're going to have a better experience as you try things whether you fail or succeed cheering yourself on is a great idea. And certainly if you're creating something new that haven't made or maybe you're doing it alone like podcast. Then of course you're going to need to give yourself a lot more encouragement. You're not gonna get a lot of feedback from other people. And maybe you want to set. That feedback need aside for now and look at. Just what you're doing and give yourself some feedback. Think about. Is this helping other people. Is this going to build them up. Is it going to create beauty. What is it. i'm a for when. I create this thing now that we've talked about the way we tell the story the automatic thinking. We have the way we feel about it and what we can do. Let's project into the next year ahead. Let's look at twenty twenty one as you think to the coming year. What kind of things would you like to create in the world. What would you like to create in your own life. Some people want to create the physically most healthy version of themselves and they start habits that create Weight loss maybe increased muscle mass. Maybe they exercise more. Some people want to create a more organized home life. And they start habits that declutter or clean things on a regular basis. Other people have goals that might be more specific to a business or a hobby or something like that. Maybe you wanna create new patterns in your business world. Maybe want to teach with more confidence and clarity and your message. Maybe you'd like to connect better in your relationships and let go of what others think so you can be more confident and then also find out how they think and feel but not necessarily about you so you can connect to those other people without letting their opinions control you and you can also see them more clearly and understand them. Whatever it is you'd like to create in two thousand twenty one. Now is the time to think about the way you tell that story why you wanna do this. What automatic thoughts might come up along the way and how you'd like to feel about it as you take action on those things you're going to set yourself up for a very good year ahead putting yourself in the driver's seat of your life in whatever area you're going to focus on well that's the message today. A mindset to create. Thank you for being here. Thank you for taking this journey of self growth with me and best wishes to you this week. Being the best version of you. This has been a podcast called mindset for life by bethany at dr biko dot com to find me on the web you can visit my blog or website at www dot dr be coached dot com. That's d r being over. Ach dot com.

Bethany hanson bethany youtube walmart italy sound jim dr biko bethany
#33: Being an Exceptional Manager

Mindset for Life

11:35 min | 7 months ago

#33: Being an Exceptional Manager

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethany Year coach from Dr v Coach Dot Com coaching with power purpose practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Hello there. This is Bethany Hanson of Dr Biko Dot Com and thank you so much for joining me for today's Podcast I. Do want to let you know as we start the podcast today that I have several different access or delivery avenues for this podcast I'm on stitcher. I'm on Google podcast on apple podcasts and several others. If you visit my website and just check out the subscribe area at Dr Be. Coach Dot Com. You should be able to find just about any podcast platform. You're interested in, so please check it out. Today's topic is about being an exceptional manager. Most of us who have been in leadership roles especially when we are managing other people, we are so interested in being the best. We possibly can be as a manager. Part of that is that we don't want to let her team down. We want to truly lead them and to lead them well, but the second part of that is that maybe were on a longer pathway and we just WanNa make sure that we're still performing well developing in our roles and becoming more capable for whatever comes in the future either way. Being an exceptional manager is an excellent goal. How does one become an ex- excellent manager or an exceptional manager. Well first of all I'd like to think about people that I have known that have been. Managers. There was one in particular who really did a fantastic job of keeping the entire team informed of details that perhaps really work kind of proprietary or Need to know basis, and he confided in the team to ensure that we were in the loop at all times, this kind of trust and confiding in the team and communicating crucial details helped everyone to feel valued, but it also helps us to do our jobs much better. He had one on one visits with us to ensure that we were progressing and having a chance to be heard, and he also had regular team meetings in. In these team meetings, he came with an agenda of things he wanted to cover, and he also opened the floor to anything that we wanted to discuss. There was a very positive rapport in a positive mood to the meetings and overall. I always looked forward to them. It seemed like there were always exciting things to look forward to in that department, and there was always a future ahead. That had possibilities even when it was bleak. So. What would it take for each of us to become a more exceptional manager? I have today eight things that I'd like to share. Each of these eight is inspired by the book conscious business. And I hope you'll check it out if you have some time to look further for some additional reading. The first one is an excellent suggestion for any teacher or manager. It is give recognition or praise for doing good work. Now when we are giving our direct reports recognition, there are so many ways we can do it. There are of course the informal ways like a quick email or short phone call. Those check INS build humongous amounts of rapport especially when things are tight in, something might be more questionable and we need to check up on it. If we've been giving recognition for small and simple things along the way, then trust is already there. That rapport has been built, and we're able to handle the most challenging things. So giving recognition or praise for doing good work should be very specific. When this praises given. It's helpful when you can give the example of exactly what you've observed and what you're talking about. Furthermore if you're able to tie it to the company's values mission, that's even better because it starts to tell the story of the organization in very real time for things that are actually going on. Faculty members employee's subordinates. People in all roles that might report to us are very happy to get feedback. Most of us are just thirsty for feedback we want to know is anything we're doing. Make a difference. So if you can share that, it is making a difference that will really help. People stay motivated and stay on the path of self-improvement and professional growth. Second. Let the team know their opinions count. Some of the ways you can let the team know that their opinions count are to ask them directly in your private or one on one phone calls generally in emails where you have something where you're soliciting some information and also in larger team meetings you can ask for feedback. You could ask for thoughts and ideas, and when possible if it's if it's something that can be actually implemented. That's even better because not only. Will Your team feel heard? But when they see something, start to get put in motion. They really feel like they're having an impact on the organization. You can ask what's going well. You can ask for some insights about problems that are happening even if they can't make the final decision. Giving their input is extremely useful. One of those experiences I had was a few years back when I was in a particular managerial role I was working with one of the top executives of our organization. When that person's annual performance review came up I was sent an email asking for my very specific feedback on that person's performance. Of, course I wasn't there manager or even their immediate peer, so it wasn't really in a great position to give that feedback, but simply being asked was a phenomenal opportunity. I reflected on the time which I engage with that person times I had been on committees with them. Work I had seen them. Do I was actually able to give plenty of good feedback that was articulate, well written and very detailed and supportive so. Asking opinions of others that you work with, and especially those you manage is very helpful. Number, three. Help, them feel that their job is important and tied to company mission and purpose of course one of the ways you can do that is in asking them for their opinions, and letting them know their opinions count as well as giving the recognition or praise, so we've mentioned two already that help. People feel that their jobs are important, but specifically whenever we're sharing things that need to change areas where we are going into. Into, uncharted waters and different directions, we'd like the company to go. When we can tie those things into the mission and purpose of the organization and site, specific roles strengths, those individuals might be able to contribute and ways in which will engage with each other. This can help. Everyone feel that their job is important, and it is tied to the bigger goals of the organization and the mission and purpose of the whole company. Number Four. Remember we are all on this journey, even ourselves as managers. It's tempting to try to put a perfection outlook in front of people like we really WanNa perform well, so we're very nervous about letting others CR mistakes or looking weak in front of others, but we have to absolutely take the plunge and do the work in our own lives be authentic and vulnerable. It builds trust with everyone. So if there's something we're struggling with, and we'd like some guidance or suggestions, we can share that. Consider how it might be shared in a way. That would be most productive. And just help others to know we are all on the same journey, and that we ourselves are aware we are still growing. Number five. Work very hard on professional growth and learning. But relax when carrying out your role. It is easier said than done to work hard, but then relax, but by relax. What I'm saying is to really kind of do those things that come most naturally that fit your own personal values that also aligned with your companies goals, and be best version of you that you can don't try to be someone else as a manager. Take your personal style into this role, and you'll be surprised at how much you make specific difference just by being yourself. Number six. This one is probably the most difficult especially for those of US newer in a management position. If we've changed roles, or this is our first time being a manager, it's really hard to allow ourselves to kind of be. Introspective about our own role in the problem, but it's critical to look within for our contribution to a problem. One question we might ask is. Might I be part of the problem? And How can I be part of what's going right? When we look within for our contribution to any problem, it keeps US looking for blind spots and ready to adapt and learn. Anytime, we can humble and and teach ourselves and kind of be open to this. We're going to find that we are approachable to others to, and this also helps us to look more authentic and more human, and just be able to adjust and adapt more quickly. Number seven. Remember we cannot guarantee any outcomes we aim for outcomes we prepare and work hard at outcomes, but in the end we cannot guarantee them. What we can do is work hard to be in integrity with our values related to the goal. So I. We have to know what our values are. What do we care most about in this role and in life generally, and how can we target the goal with respect to those value us? The more we can do that. The more we can live as our authentic selves, and the more we can show up as exceptional managers, simply by bringing our own strengths and values into this game. And lastly number eight reflect on what we can do in the next couple of months to live by our values, as managers can tributaries, coaches and human beings. There are some areas where we can really dig in to develop ourselves more fully. And those areas would be self, care, self, compassion, and doing the inner work necessary. To know what our thoughts and feelings are about things what our values are, what our strengths are and to acknowledge our weaknesses. For example in some areas, we might have to overcome some beliefs and assumptions about our weaknesses. We don't need to hide weaknesses. Maybe we need to work with other people to delegate in areas of our weaker traits and maybe grow in those areas as well. Overall the most important thing as we reflect on what we can do in the next couple of months to live by our values and our role. The most important part would to keep growing and stay hopeful of things to come in the future. There is always something to be learned and something better coming in the future, even if it's not exactly what we expect. Thank you for listening today. I hope these eight tips for being an exceptional manager will be useful to you I. Wish you all the best in being the best version of you. This has been a podcast called mindset for life by Bethany. At Dr Biko Dot Com to find me on the web. visit my blog or my website at www dot doctor be coached dot com. That's D R. Being C. O. A., C. H.. Dot Com.

Dr Biko Dot Com Dr Be Google Bethany Hanson US O. A.
#38 Mindset to Forgive

Mindset for Life

16:04 min | 6 months ago

#38 Mindset to Forgive

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethany Year coach from Dr Be Coach, Dot Com coaching with power purpose, practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Hello and welcome to the podcast today. Forgiveness is a character strength. We're going to talk about if you take a moment to visit the V. I, a character strength survey, you will learn how strong of a trait this is in your life. If it's not a strength for you or for me. We can develop it. In his book forgiving what you'll never forget. David. Stoop wrote the following. To forgive is in the English language and extended expanded strengthened form of the verb to give. By intensifying the verb with of giving at its deepest level of self giving. Or giving fourth and giving up deeply-held parts of the self. We give up the right to revenge to perfection to justice. And instead we give forth to ourselves or to the other person freedom from the past and an openness toward the future. Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves and others. In order to need forgiveness, we must have I judge that something should have happened or something should not have happened. Either way we perceive that something is very wrong and based on what we believe to be true. We might also believe that somebody else should fix it or make it right or pay for it. These beliefs are all stories that go with our thoughts about what happened where we think forgiveness is necessary. So. For today's PODCAST, we will consider three things. Is, forgiveness a mindset first of all. How do you define forgiveness? And secondly, why should we forgive and lastly how do we do it? So, how how have you typically defined forgiveness? As for me, I used to define forgiveness as something I might want from other people. When I've made a mistake, I thought it meant that I would apologize try to fix something or ask the other person involved to give me forgiveness. One I thought about forgiveness like this. It seemed that I could never be in control of that someone else outside of me had the power to forgive me. Perhaps I could never do enough to earn their forgiveness. If that was true. The no matter how sorry I was or how much they tried to fix the thing ultimately someone else was going to decide whether I could let it go or feel better or move on. Expecting forgiveness to come from somebody else. This is a common way to think about it but there are several reasons why this is a problem. Have you ever defined forgiveness this way? If. We look at forgiveness is something somebody else gives the offending person? There would be no forgiveness when somebody has died. When there isn't any way to contact the other person or when the offender has truly changed and made things right but the victim is holding tightly an unwilling heart. So. For many reasons, forgiveness is not something we can expect to get from other people. Warner wrote a book called Vaughn's that make us free. And in this book, he defines forgiveness like this. Forgiveness correctly understood is the process by which we open ourselves to the reality of others and thereby undergo a profound personal change. When someone asked him, how can you forgive another person and forget at the same time? Warner said that we can't accuse someone in our heart and at the same time forget about the wrong we're accusing them of doing. After all in order to forgive, we must I accuse someone of wrongdoing? Basically when we believe someone has offended us or wronged us we accuse them. And we. Blame. Them. We might even escalate that the level of hating resenting or hurting them in return. We harden our hearts against the other person and we build a case we build invo invisible walls to separate ourselves from them. It's kind of like we start a war with someone who has hurt us. Because we believe they have done something wrong. and. In doing this, we are doing something wrong ourselves. We're harboring blame an accusations toward that other person. We're justifying why we are stuck in some way because that other person has done something. I can think of so many instances where one person has clung. So tightly to the offense that they told that story, all the time is justification years and years onward for not moving on. Here's an example. So last week I spoke to an adult man who said that he had no control over his life since the third grade because of what his third grade teacher did to him. This person was still telling the story of events that happened when he was seven or eight years old and how much he cannot do now because of those events. It's unlikely that the third grade teacher thinks about it at all and they might never see each other again. By holding onto this story, that man avoids needing to learn to write legibly and a few other skills that would help him now in adulthood. The story does not harm the third grade teacher even if she really did wrong him instead it hurts the man. Another example is a woman whose husband was unfaithful during their marriage. Because of adultery, the two decided to divorce and move on through life without each other. The man married again and worked to change himself over time to learn how to discipline himself to become more the person he thought he should be. The woman chose not to date a remarried. As the years went by she told the story repeatedly how she prepared long for a committed marriage and that man ruined her dreams by being unfaithful. Although it is a very complex situation and difficult for a person to live through forgiveness in each situation is tool for freedom and the space to live again and to move forward. Why should we forgive first of all it's not my goal today to push anyone to forgive. I understand it is very difficult to forgive the choices. People make especially when they seem very wrong to us and have hurt us. I want you to know that were exploring this topic today I'm not trying to preach how you should be. When there is an offense or action taken by someone that hurts us. We accuse. AND BLAME THEM Accusing others who believe we believe that they wrongdoer offended US puts us in the role of victim. If we see ourselves as victim, we give up all of our control and we bind ourselves to that other person. Are Story becomes the reason we cannot heal and we can recover. We think that we're less than we might be because that other person's problem or their choices toward us. We blame that other person for what we are. Or what we're not able to do now. In. A sense. We relive that situation over and over in the present every time we tell the story. Without even realizing it. Accusing and blaming the other person we're doomed to bring them with us throughout our lives. And we tell the story of what happened over and over again, keeping stuck to this other person for a very long time. As we are thinking about what is going on when we sense the need to forgive someone else. It seems that in order to be open to the possibility of truly forgiving. Our hearts must be open to the possibility that there might be another story to tell. Even considering the possibility that there might be another story opens things up. Here's an example. That person who cuts us off in traffic causing us to stop our car quickly and spill a milkshake all over our legs. At first, it would be very easy to think that driver did it thoughtlessly there a reckless driver they shouldn't even be on the road. When we find out, they have a family member in the car who is gravely injured and they are speeding to the hospital a mile away. It seems a little easier to understand the situation. The news story means we might have a mess to clean up, but perhaps we understand the emergency and maybe we even want to get out of their way to help them get to the hospital faster. Alternately for. The way to become free from bondage to stories that don't service. To forgive, we open the door to moving forward. So I propose that the disposition of our hearts or our state of feeling forgiveness it starts not in our hearts at all but in our mind and that's where the mindset part of this comes in. There's this idea that we use a thinking process in any situation without even realizing it. And for some people, this thinking process is called the ladder of inference. This thinking process starts when some information input or facts come into our brain. It moves through several steps till we reach a decision. Now understand this process happens lightning-fast we're not really conscious of it. thinking stages would be like rungs on a ladder or steps. Each, one of us has different steps in our thought processes. These. Steps or thoughts are things like these. Look at the data or information then filter that through our own values and assumptions. And then we sort of paraphrase it in her mind to make sense of it. We think about it in the context that it happened to understand it more clearly. then. We give it a name and explain what is happening. Again with her own mental filters, we then explain evaluate what happened and make sense and decide what to do in a flash. This is a very, very fast process. Our minds move in microseconds through this pathway taking each of these steps to think through something. If forgiveness begins in our minds were actually competing with some pretty rigid thought processes to get to the place where we are forgiving someone. In fact because our brains are wired for efficiency, we actually tend to think in patterns and have habitual thoughts. We have habits of thinking certain ways. So we're GONNA have a difficult time challenging the way we think. That's going to involve slowing things down. And thinking something different. And it means new thinking habits. So how do we forgive someone? The idea is that forgiving others includes three parts that really are all within our own control and I took these three parts from bonds that make us free by Terry Warner. I, we focus on our own part of the problem, an address what is actually within our control? Second. Open our hearts towards others and try to understand rather than blaming or accusing. As, we try to understand we might learn about true stories that were behind what happened. And third. We let go of accusations and blame so that we can see the humanity of the other person. When we are accusing and blaming, we are motivated to carry a heart that is at war. Letting go transforms the other person in front of our eyes. By seeing them differently we also transform ourselves. We become capable of what we never could do before. So as we bring these ideas together, I would like to share a story of my own that involves forgiveness. And acknowledge that forgiveness is hard. It's not an easy thing to do. By working through the process and allowing our hearts to change, we truly become different. And I wouldn't give that up to escape those challenging situations that cause the need for forgiveness in the first place. In my story, I had a friend who hurt me in a very personal way it was no small thing to me. It was such a big fence that I wasn't sure I wanted to understand the friend. Certainly I would. I would probably have been justified letting go of that friendship all together and just moving on. At. The time I even thought anyone else would agree with me. As time went on I realized my friend had some serious challenging challenges that they were trying to overcome. It took that person several years to figure it all out and let go of their habits. As time passed I tried to be as supportive friend and be a good example at times. I. Thought this person in my life was spiteful and pretty mean on I. Couldn't find any other explanation for the wrong they did. As the years went by and learn about seeing my own role in the problem. Pretty soon, I used my perspective on that friendship and I realized all the time that I was trying to be a good friend and an example for this other person I was actually judging them pretty harshly. I was not understanding supportive or encouraging to my friend. In fact, the way I saw myself made it so very difficult for my friend to change or overcome their problem. Initially I had thought I needed to forgive my friends offense after all I saw it as a really big offense. And over time I realized I needed to fix whatever my role was in that problem. No I didn't 'cause my friends problem but I wasn't helping either. And my accusations of the hurt they caused me kept them stuck. In the end I was able to completely let go of that offense my friend had given me. I even apologize to them for not being there when they really needed me. I, let go of that hurt my started doing my best to understand my friend and just work on my own flaws and problems. This process actually took ten years. And as I think that friend, I am so amazed at their growth, their gifts and talents shared with others and the direction that they're headed. I would have missed seeing that in my friend if I had just let go of that friendship with all the hurt I felt and I might have carried that story with me struggling to let it go the rest of my life. Some things in life are small. And it can be good practice to let go of offenses quickly in those cases. Other. Things are quite big and they might seem impossible to forgive. Regardless of what is happened I hope that today you are thinking about this idea that forgiveness is for the person who has heard or who is offended much more than it ever is for the person who has heard us. If, you're thinking about forgiveness, you would like to feel I. Hope you'll find some tools here to think about to help you get started. I wish you all the best this coming week becoming the best version of YOU and letting go of whatever might be holding you back. This has been a podcast called mindset for life by Bethany at Dr Biko. Dot. com. To find me on the web, you can visit my blog or my website at www dot doctor be coach dot com. That's D R. BEING CPO ACH DOT COM.

Terry Warner Stoop David Dot. Dr Biko Vaughn eight years ten years
#55: Stop Looking For Happiness in Doing More and Focus on These 5 Things Instead

Mindset for Life

14:10 min | Last month

#55: Stop Looking For Happiness in Doing More and Focus on These 5 Things Instead

"Episode number fifty five stop looking for happiness and doing more and focus on these five things instead. Welcome to the mind set for life. Podcast this is bethany. Your coach from dr be coach dot com coaching with power purpose and practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Welcome to the podcast. Today i am so glad you're here. It's time to stop looking for happiness and doing more and focus on these five things instead. Yup that's right today. I'm going to share with you five tips and a little known secret. Stay tuned to this podcast. Because i'm going to give it to you at the end of our time together in the next ten minutes. I'm going to help you figure out what might be missing in your life. I'll share what i've learned from martin seligman in the field of positive psychology about happiness to help you understand how to experience more of it in your life and i'm going to share that little known secret. I mentioned a moment ago. It might surprise you but it's going to help you in your life your relationships and your work. So where do we seek happiness. People spend so much time looking for happiness. We think it's going to come to us from a career. Maybe if we have the kind of job we want we'll be happy then. Sure career success and growth can inspire us. The work we do every day brings meaning to life when there are opportunities to try new projects or meet new people work as enjoyable and then there are those parts of our work that are repetitive monotonous and less enjoyable. We might even change jobs or careers thinking that it's the job. Somehow the job has failed us. And we're off to another one looking for happiness and satisfaction. Then we think it's going to come from relationships if we get connected to the right. People in our lives will be happy then. Some people get married thinking this will bring happiness or divorced thinking that will bring happiness or we have children and look for our happiness in them. When children grow up to make different choices or have challenges we might wonder. Is it their job to make us happy. And then there's our physical health. Perhaps we realized that we would like to be in different physical shape if we need to lose some weight to get healthier we think about losing weight and we believe that will make us happy. The journey of weight loss is a challenging one. And it's often very difficult. I've been there myself. And i know that road very well. We think that when we are a certain size or when we hit our weight goal we will feel better. We will finally be happy and so it goes where on an endless search for happiness. We think we need to do things to get it. We need to work harder or we need the right job. Unhappiness will be the result. We need the right situation. The right relationships other people will make us happy. We need to have the right kind of physical health or hit the goal. and then we'll be happy. You may not heard of this. But there's an idea called the happiness set point. There's this idea that people have a general level of happiness. They experienced most of the time we call this. The happiness set point. It could be temperament personality or something else that influences this but each person has this general level of how happy they are from one day to the next sonia liver mirsky a psychology professor at the university of california riverside proposed that people's happiness levels is fifty percent due to genetic inheritance which means people can only move their happiness up and down from this happiness set point and we generally go back to that set point. The idea. is that when something comes up. That moves our happiness meter. We feel happier for a short time. We have a new relationship or something happens in our professional life and initially. We feel that experience made us happy. We move into a new house. We go on vacation and again. We feel a little happier for a short time. Then after that initial elevated level of happiness we just go right back to our happiness set point and we don't feel that increased happiness anymore we keep moving up or down with a little more happiness and then returning to our set point over time because of this experience. We're having we start to think that we need to do more or get more to feel happy again instead. We're focusing all on the external things that don't really bring lasting happiness at this point we've explored the ways we're chasing happiness and why we should stop looking for happiness in doing more or in getting things or in chasing achievement. I'd like to propose that we focus on these five things instead. That's right instead of running this race looking for happiness by giving or obtaining all these things focus on these five things instead martin seligman tells us that there are five things we can focus on every day every week and throughout the year and these five things will create wellbeing. our sense of wellbeing is just another label for happiness and life satisfaction the five things that create happiness are pleasant or positive emotions engagement or flow relationships that are positive and supportive meaning and accomplishment for. Its own sake together. These five areas create the acronym perma p. e. r. m. a. And you can look at your five areas together for an idea of what creates your own happiness. This will help you. Also look at it to see where you can change it where you can increase your efforts and your own happiness. The idea behind perma and positive. Psychology generally is that not everything is going to work for every person you have to pick something. That's going to work best for you. And i have to work something. That's going to work best for me. Let's just start with the area of positive emotion. We can increase positive emotions in a lot of different ways. One of those is cultivating gratitude. We can also develop our level of forgiveness and letting go are positive. Emotion can also be connected to mindfulness which is really living in the present moment and not dwelling on the past or the future pervasively. We can also have positive emotions about the future like building. Hope and optimism. Now if you're a natural pessimist or if you consider yourself a realist. There is such a thing as learned optimism. You can figure out how to reframe things even if your whole way of being does not change on the engagement side. This is the experience where you get to use. All of your skills your strengths. Your attention to a challenging task. You're going to get into a gratifying experience. Where you're just really lost in the moment. So basically activity itself is its own reward. Slow is one of those things where your skills are just barely enough for this challenging activity so you have to stretch and you also get this sense of gratification. That you're doing something a little harder than usual. These kinds of activities help us to really get lost in the activity itself. We're not so worried about herself or critical of other people. Maybe we even lose track of time. If there's any kind of activity that works this way for you like maybe reading a book writing programming computers doing art building things gardening Being engaged in social conversations. If you're a people person you could play musical instruments. There are so many things that are gonna foster engagement for you and it can even happen in the workplace or you feel so connected to your job and you feel such engagement there that you really lose track of time and just enjoy it. The third area relationships seligman says these are fundamental to your well the experiences that actually add to your positive relationships create this sense of happiness because there might be levity laughter a feeling of actually belonging with other people and some kind of connection to emotional content in the relationship so the support we get by connecting with other people. It's one of the best ways to lift our mood and a pretty reliable way to feel up. Acts of kindness for others can also do this for us. Lastly developing strong relationships can actually increase our compassion kindness cooperation empathy and teamwork in the fourth area. We've got meaning now. I'm gonna go ahead and read this. One straight from the university of pennsylvania website about positive psychology and it is that a sense of meaning and purpose can be derived from belonging to and serving something bigger than the self. There's a lot of different organizations out there. You can join religious groups you could be part of a family. Group engage in your political affiliation. You could join an organization in your workplace and maybe a social cause or other things. There are a lot of different ways to get connected to people and have a bigger sense of being part of this. 'cause or this big idea anything that can get us outside of just the small self into the bigger world of ideas purpose and belonging is going to help us feel a greater sense of meaning overall and then lastly we've got accomplishment so if you want to achieve for the sake of actually becoming more masterful competent and just overcoming things. This is what is being talked about. Here it's not just one accomplishment other to check a box hit a goal and move on. It's doing the difficult thing to get more positive. Emotion more meaning more relationships or media doesn't even have to connect any of those things for example. Maybe you're a person who just wants to achieve some difficult feat all by yourself when you take these five things. The positive emotion the engagement or flow the positive and supportive relationships the greater sense of meaning and accomplishment for its own sake together. You have an excellent recipe for a sense of well being and of course a greater sense of happiness now. There are a lot of benefits that are gonna come from this You're going to have more satisfying relationships. And of course you will because you're pursuing them on purpose. Your physical health is going to improve. You'll have a better immune system you'll also have fewer sleeping problems lower levels of burnout greater self control more self-regulation you'll be able to cope with hard things better. You'll also have a more cooperative attitude annual perform better at work. there's also a whole bunch of research out there that links this sense of being with less depression less anxiety reduced risk of dropping out of school better. Physical health comes fewer illnesses less disease faster recovery from surgeries overall just an increased elevated sense of well being if you can get your happiness from focusing on these distinctive areas and your happiness is going to promote your success than the happiness has to come first and now. Here's the little known secret that i promised you while. Happiness is worth pursuing. It's not the end result of our efforts instead. It's the way to get all those other things in life. Happiness is the way it's a manner of living happiness is the journey itself. Success does not bring happiness. it's happiness that causes success. Yes we need strategies to in life relationships and work we all need communication skills. We might need negotiation strategies and especially at work. We need leadership skills yet. None of these strategies or skills will bring happiness if now is a great time for you to explore increasing happiness in your life learning how to develop more pleasant and positive emotions learned optimism skills for increasing your engagement or flow improving your relationships to become more positive and supportive finding greater meaning in the life. You're living and setting your goals for accomplishment. I'd love to work with you to be your coach. Please visit dr. Be coach dot com to learn more this has been a podcast called mindset for life by bethany at dr biko dot com to find the on the web you can visit my blog or my website at www dot dr be coach dot com. That's d r being cpo. Ach dot com.

martin seligman mirsky bethany sonia university of california seligman university of pennsylvania depression dr biko
#52: Active Listening

Mindset for Life

18:57 min | 2 months ago

#52: Active Listening

"Episode number fifty active listening welcomed the mind set for life podcast. This is bethany coach from dr be coach. Dot com coaching. Our purpose and practical tools. To help you show up with confidence. Thank you for joining me for today's podcast about active listening. This might not sound like a very exciting topic but if you're wondering how to make your relationships better. This is definitely a good way to do it. I heard a counselor once say that there are two types of listening listening to problem solve and listening to understand but most of the time were listening to problem solve so we're anxious to hear what another person has to say so we can offer advice feedback ideas. We might even be so excited about what they're saying that we interrupt them. Of course we don't mean to. We don't want interrupt someone else. We don't want to shut down to their ideas. We really are trying to hear them. The best we possibly can but anytime we're thinking about what we have to say when someone else is talking. We're not really listening. Listening to understand is an underutilized skill. That will service well. How can it help us. Listening to understand can help us see the hidden meaning behind what someone is telling us. We're going to get deeper into what they really think. Now for listening at work and we're trying to hear messages in what our boss is saying. What our colleagues are saying. What other people we work with in other departments are saying it's critical that we understand the meaning behind what they're really saying. Listening to understand is probably the most important thing we can ever do in those relationships. What if someone is complaining against us listening to understand. Allow us to ask questions. Get clarity that yes we in fact need to change something or make something right or maybe they just want to be heard. Many times in recent past. I have had people really just wanna talk to me to be heard. It's amazing how many times we talked to our colleagues. Our bosses are co workers are family members. It's amazing how much we feel unheard. It's like other people. Are there just not really there. So what exactly is active listening. Acton listening means that we are hearing the other person's message also we're hearing their emotions. Were hearing their concerns. Their goals were also hearing in the way. They say things and what they share with us. We're hearing their values and beliefs about the world possibilities when we're active listening. We can hear the person's words. Yes we hear the tone of voice we notice their body language but we also hear a bigger picture a story we might even notice what they are focusing on and what they're not focusing on. We might help bring something the light by asking a question about that. When we are active listening to someone else we might be totally silent. We might give a lot of contact or we might interject with little sounds that indicate relisting One of those sounds are or whatever that feedback is definitely want to do something that indicates to that other person that we are hearing them and we're still with them some things that we might choose to do one. We're actively listening to other people or that. We might actually summarize what they have said and repeat it back to them. We might check to see if we've understood them correctly so summarizing what someone has said without our own interpretation just a substrate up summary just a straight up summary that can help someone feel incredibly heard we can also restate in their own words exactly what we heard them say mirroring back to them also has the possibility of ensuring that. We've got clarity in. That reflecting back could be well. This is what. I think you're saying it could be a little paraphrase. It could be. Maybe a statement. That i hear. You're saying that you're frustrated. I hear you saying that you're feeling limited. Whatever our statement back is it's intended to simply acknowledge the message right. So we're going to be saying things that are summary oriented repetition oriented paraphrasing. But we're not interjecting a lot of interpretation when we do that for other people. Other people feel deeply heard they even feel felt understood. We do not have to agree with anything someone else's saying when we do this it's just a skill to be learned and as we do it. We build bridges between us. We build connections with those other people. We open ourselves to greater possibilities. Name might be wondering how can you do. Kind of active listing where just reflecting back what was said checking for understanding and hearing someone. You might be wondering. How do you do that without sharing your guidance and advice. Well it comes down to this idea that many times people will not adopt advice or even understand it until they have figured it out for themselves unless the other person says it. That advice really is going to be lost on them often. That's the case so if we're really listening and we're hearing them it's possible. The advice we might have offered is something they would create it anyway. So this hearing it's a very powerful skill and one that will help marriages business partners here. Child relationships friendships brands of relationships. Now the next step of active listening would be that we then do something with those ideas that we're hearing we can bring parts of their comments and ask questions that take it to another level for example if a person sharing difficult situation with us we might ask. What does that mean for. You might also think about what are you thinking about that or more emotionally. What are you feeling about that. The more we ask questions to expand what is being shared with us the more were able to encourage the other person we can help them feel accepted and understood and further. That person may be able to deeply explore how their feelings are with their thoughts are with their concerns are and why they're so stuck in given situation many times we think around a story ourselves that we would love to share with someone else. And we're kinda stuck in that story the more were able to explore it without someone else judging us or Being offended by it or taking it personally the more we could just talk about it the more we can actually explore it in a less emotional way we can see all sides of the issue. We can decide where we want to go with something but when we're worried that someone else is judging what we have to say. It's very difficult for us to see the whole picture. We might be hiding part of what we would share because we don't want to offend that person or her feelings were unable to truly be open and honest about our thoughts when we are actively listening to somebody else were allowing them to really be themselves to fully be honest and be heard and we can just be impartial and reflected back at acknowledged that they have to say. Sometimes people might want to just vent or clear the air about things without being judged or upsetting somebody and when we can hear that and not have any attachment to whether saying they might be able to work through it and move on to the next step for the next phase of their situation so listening to be understood. That's what activists thing is all about. Might be wondering. Why do we need to be understood. So deeply will whether or not you've ever felt someone has listening to you in this way. It seems like we go around in our lives trying very hard to put our message out there. Share our opinion Deal with our feelings. We really wanna be understood because one we are understood then we can feel okay holding so much insider of minds by ourselves thinking about all of the things going on our feelings about them. Our thoughts about them. It's a huge amount of work. When somebody listens to understand us we can release some of that pressure. We can feel okay about ourselves and we can even feel like we are acceptable and we are enough. There are some reasons why people have a difficult time listening to understand each other or actively listening and the truth. Is we come with these mental models or mindsets that really develop over time. For example we might have certain assumptions that we hold about people situations life as a whole. We might have some expectations there. Things we about our values are specific to us. And we also anticipating cert- we also anticipate certain things there might be cultural differences between us and whoever were speaking wa differences in our age our gender our educational background and sometimes the words us alone can be very dif- different from one person to the next so a way that we might use a word might not mean the same thing to someone else so there are a lot of things that are different between us that. Make it difficult to listen to understand. We have these assumptions. We also have a lot going on in our lives to distract us. We might be thinking about how we share a similar situation or experience with who were talking to and for that reason or judgment about the situation or our past experience might come into our minds and just make it very difficult to listen openly about. It might also be thinking about what we need to do in five minutes or where we need to go in the busy world we live in. It's very easy to get distracted by the fact that something else is coming up so might have time sensitive issues or something weighing our minds and also the distracted distraction region world. We live in will interrupt us with our text messages. Our phones hot phone calls emails all kinds of things so there are a lot of great reasons why we need to be understood that also why we have a real hard time doing this for other people. Listening to understand is a skill to cultivate. It takes a great deal of happiness and we need to become comfortable with silence. Silence is a space where the other person just might be thinking about what they said. They might have gained a little bit of awareness. Their thoughts might be developing as they're speaking to you and giving them a little bit of silence will give them the space to clarify in their minds before speaking again becoming comfortable with what we call verbal white space. This is where we can actually be there for another person and be okay not jumping in and not talking right away now. How do you become better at active listening. What can you do to really show up for another person and not be preoccupied by time. Demands assumptions distractions or other things. The first idea is to quiet your mind. These ideas come from a book called expanding horizons. And it's by carole bennett and michelle pain. And these suggestions are too. I be fully present in quiet your mind then secondly me show up like a journalist listened to understand their bottom line. Listen for the message. Third be alert to what they're not saying. There might be something more to this story. That's just not coming through fourth. Relax your face. Haven't open facial expression your expression can then be authentic to whatever is being said to you and you'll be aligned and congruent fifth in your voice use a tone and a volume that matches. What the person's talking about for example. If they're showing something exciting you might want to respond with enthusiasm and excitement. And if they're sharing something depressing sad and difficult might wanna slow your speech down and not be as excited sounding. That's connect conflict with what's going on and then six match your pace to the person's pace in the conversation so if they're talking really fast you might wanna talk really fast. If they're talking. Really slowly and pausing a lot you might want to do the same thing. This mirroring the other person and remember that. You don't always have to question what the other person says to be actively listening. Sometimes you can just make a small southbound that indicates you're hearing them sometimes you can be silent and sometimes you ask a question or summarize or restate back to the person what you're hearing. These are really helpful skills to develop the ability. Slow down and really attended. What another person's saying you might enjoy it. You might get to know them better and that person is going to walk away with a sense of being really heard and really valued at some future time. You might find. You do have something to share. You might have advice. You might want to offer a solution in the moment of being heard. That's not really the best time for that. So calming yourself and really acknowledging the other person can help them feel like you've heard them if you were to think about what kind of a listener you are. Would you say that you are distracted. Preoccupied listener listening part of the time. Are you fairly in tune listener listening most of the time or are you a completely focused absorbed listener really diving into listening to another i sent. It might be difficult to know what kind of listener you are. Until you're in the moment of the conversation we feel a lot of pressure to give to other people to show up with something to say and to have something to offer in conversation. Active listening means. We don't have to have anything to offer anybody. We don't have to have anything to offer. We're holding space for that. Other person were knowledge ing them. We're listening deeply and we're helping them feel hurt understood. We don't have to have any answers. We don't have to have all the answers and certainly we don't even need to know what they should do or what they could do. We don't have avin thing to say at all. If you'll take the pressure off yourself and just listen understand. It can be incredibly powerful experience for you. Consider how life would be if we look at the other person. Maintain i contact and simply. Don't interrupt them. What an interesting experience if you're if you're if you have that experience very often yourself being heard by someone who does that for you. Who really is present and listens within tent. You're one of the lucky few people around do need that kind of gift someone to listen if you haven't been that kind of listener. This is a great time to practice. Think about how you can show up for someone else how you might try active listening in your life and what you might do to control your thoughts emotions and those interruptions that might creep into your mind while you're hearing that person. I hope you've appreciated this conversation about active listening. And i wish you all the best in focusing on active listening this coming week and trying it out in in practice. I'd love to hear how it went for you. Semi note at bethany at dr be coach dot com. And if you have any suggestions you would add to that list of how become an active listener. Definitely send them my way. Here's to being the best version of you. This week this has been a podcast called mindset for life by bethany at dr biko dot com to find me on the web you can visit my blog or my website at www dot. Dr be coached dot com. That's d r c. o. a. c. h. dot com.

bethany carole bennett michelle pain wa five minutes dr biko bethany
#35: What I Learned about Navigating Uncertainty from Marching Band

Mindset for Life

22:38 min | 6 months ago

#35: What I Learned about Navigating Uncertainty from Marching Band

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethany Year coach from Dr. Be Coach Dot, com coaching with power purpose practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Thank you for joining me for today's podcast today. We're going to talk about a topic so close to my heart, and that is marching band. Of course, this will be a metaphor. But I hope you'll go with me on the ride. First of all. Let's talk about who you are. You are someone with gifts and talents and abilities. You have so much to offer. You have many good things to contribute to the people around you and to the world. You have a gift to give in small ways in large ways. And it's time to develop that direction and confidence even more fully. I hope that you will look at other areas of my website and listen to other episodes of my podcast so that you can dive into your values, your needs, your strengths, your priorities and a lot of these different areas to help you focus where you'd like to go. Today. We're going to talk about handling uncertainty in the future. I invite you to consider the truth. The future is and will always be uncertain and if we focus on what we can control. Keep learning and use our strengths. We have the best chance of thriving and succeeding in our personal lives and wellbeing. In our relationships and family. In our work, business and career. In Teaching and coaching others. In negotiating challenges, setbacks and devastating losses. And in leading with confidence and purpose, so that others can also become hopeful and capable of negotiating uncertainty. So let's dive in. Today I'm going to take you on a journey to the past. I experienced this about twenty five years ago. I was observing another band director and I was a student becoming a band teacher. This experience took place in the fall. And there was a lot of wetness. It was raining snowing. Something like that I honestly don't even remember. What kind of precipitation was occurring. But it was a definite stormy day. And it was the day of a big marching band competition. Now I want you to imagine for a moment that you are playing a musical instrument. If you're not a musician. That's okay. Think about the complexity of holding that instrument. Pressing all the keys. We're going to make a trumpet, so you're going to hold it straight out. Remember, the combination of all the notes and you're going to be performing three or four long songs that maybe take. Five or ten minutes total. And you're going to have spent many years learning to play that instrument possibly seven eight years. And in playing this instrument. You're going to memorize all four of those songs you're going to play. On top of it. You're going to move around while you're playing that memorized music. Not only are you going to move around? But you're going to wear somewhat stiff and restricting marching band uniform. You're going to need to hold that trumpet straight out or even slightly higher than straight, so the audience can hear it really well. You're going to need to be able to move quickly. Memorize hundreds of spots on a marching banfield. Really, it's just marked with yard lines. Just like the football team uses. You'RE GONNA. Use those lines, and you're going to move from spot spot spot. As you played different clips of that music. And while you're doing that, you're going to also be incredibly artistic and expressive with your sound. You're going to play loud and soft. You're going to play musical lines to communicate a message to the audience. You'RE GONNA create real beauty on your trumpet while you're moving around on that football field. And furthermore, you're going to be moving to spots that are really one dot within a larger shape. All the other people moving with you are part of that shape, so not only. Do you need to remember your music near expressive nece your posture, your confidence and your spate space on the field. You need to be able to stay in the moment to all of the people around you so that the shape looks accurate, and it looks convincing and clear end striking to the audience. As I describe all of this. Certainly, it sounds like a very complex experienced, doesn't it? If, you've been part of a marching band. You know exactly what I'm talking about, and if you haven't I hope this gives you some idea of the complexity that goes into this experience. So imagine if you will that. You are the trumpet player. In that marching band, and it is time for the biggest performance of the year. You've performed this very complex marching band show several times. You started in the summertime. You spent hours and hours learning it practicing with the others in your band. Your band director coached you and you've practiced the instrument as well so you know the music well, and it is time for the biggest competition of the year. And it is raining. Well if you know anything about rain. You also know that on it. Football field it can create mud. It can create slick spots. It can cause you to slip and fall. And especially if you're moving quickly, it can really become an uncertain. Nasty place to be. So here, you are in this marching band. And I'm going to share with you kind of this speech that I heard this band director give his band in preparation for a performance. So you are completely prepared. You have done all that you possibly could do to get here. Other bands today they have marched around. They have slipped and and smudged up that field, and they have been on confident because step after step. They meant uncertainty. They hit slick patches. They hit mud. They hit puddles and sometimes they hit good grass. But while they marched around, they really just struggled. And now it is our turn. As you step out onto that field. As the rain hits you. I want you to strengthen your resolve. Breathing deeply and consider it is fueling you with power to perform at your highest. As, you step each foot onto that field. If it slips I. Want you to really plant it hard because you are going to expect that slip. You will slip every step, and as you slip, your confidence will increase. Your power will increase your ability to make your sets hit. The spots on the field will increase. And you will be even more empowered to perform the greatest show of life. Now that kind of talk is what happened with this marching band I observed. I heard the band director talking his group? Experience and he actually had them all close their eyes and visualize going through the entire show on the slick muddy field before it happened. He talked to them about how critical it was to get the music to the audience. Many of them had never heard the show before they came from out of town to see other bands, and he mentioned how critical it was to bring them this beautiful gift of music this beautiful show. And how confident they could become each time. They felt a slick spot on that field. And boy did this happen. When they performed the show, and they took the field that high school marching band was incredibly strong and confident, compared to all of the groups that performed by they took the field. That band looked like there was no rain at all. They looked like it was a sunny beautiful day. And maybe they weren't even marching on grass, maybe asphalt concrete. They really were just locking in each new spot that they moved to. We call those sets in marching band so they. Locked in every set that they went to. Their music was more confident than usual. They lifted their instruments a little higher, so the sound traveled up directly to the audience sitting in that stadium. It was a very powerful thing. I can tell you. I was not surprised when I went to the awards ceremony that evening and they won. What is called a grand champion trophy? And the grand champion trophy is it's like you have the best in your category, but you also have the best scores overall of single band. That was there that day. Now I share this story with you as kind of a metaphor. The future is and always will be uncertain. Yes. We may know ahead of time. The small things like there might be rain. There might be a muddy field. But. We do not know when the stock market will take a dramatic downturn. We do not know when property values will drop, and we won't be able to sell our house. We will not know. When companies will have to rapidly downsize and we might lose a job. We will not know when someone might come down with a major illness covid nineteen cancer. Something significant, that will radically change a life or Death. We cannot know when people will betray us or leave US ahead of time. And we cannot know when we ourselves might fail or falter despite our best efforts. The future is an always will be uncertain, and if we focus on what we can control, keep learning and use our strengths. We have the best chance of thriving and succeeding in every area of life and work. So! How do we do that focusing on what we can control? Going back to the metaphor of the marching band that I shared with you earlier in this podcast. Let's think about what that band could control. Definitely, not the weather, and definitely not the conditions of the field. But they could control and did control. Their ability to master their craft. They focused on their strengths and their strengths were hundreds of hours of preparation. Hundreds of hours of learning that actual show, but beyond that years and years of learning their instruments individually. They had worked together as a group consistently for several months, and they could rely on that preparation. But each individual person could also rely on their strengths musically and in the show. So think about strengths and what we can control. So the first thing in thinking about what we can control. Things that we can control are really quite few. We have so few things we can control like. We can control our own selves. We can control our own experience our thoughts. We can control what we choose to where we can control what we're going to eat. We can control what we participate in. We can control what we choose to. Do in the future. We can choose what we were going to do right now. We can control our choices. We cannot control anything outside of ourselves. We cannot control our environment. Our context other people's opinions of us. Other people's needs or desires What other people judge us to be? There are so many things out of our control that truly great uncertainty follows US everywhere. We go all the time even in times of peace and calm in our country or wherever we live. So thinking about what we can control is so important. I cannot control the outcome. Truly that marching band could go out on that field and be as confident as possible and truly be resolute about their performance and yet. Things can still happen. It can still be more slushy than expected and someone could slip. It's possible that despite them being on perfect in their performance, another band might have been better and they could've still won that award. The best thing I think in that example. It wasn't about the outcome. It was not about. Let's aim for winning grand champion. They did not have that as their goal. They had as their goal being the best version of themselves. Performing at the highest level, they were capable of using their preparation and strengths. And focusing it decisively. How many times does a person consider a decision and vacillate over time? Make the decision. Start taking a little bit of action and then step back a little bit because maybe. Things don't support that action. We start to doubt. Was it the right decision? Should I do this? How do I know if it's right? There are a lot of things beyond our control, and we let some of those things influence us and make us believe that. Maybe the decision was wrong, and so we might waffle a little bit or Failed to continue persevering and then later something else will. Remind us, and we will remake the decision and step forward again. In the end we can control our decisions. We can control our direction. We cannot control the feedback. We get or the outcome that. Happens. Let's just say we're a business and we have it as our goal. To have ten times the revenue we started with. Can Put all the effort in we can learn our market in our audience. We can work diligently. Hire the best people and really be a lean agile business, the best we possibly can. In the end. We likely will do well, but the actual final outcome is with without our control. We cannot guarantee. Customers will show up. We can do our absolute best, but we can't guarantee it. How about teaching? Let's say we're an educator. We've planned the lesson well. We know our students. We've aligned. Everything's so that we're preparing. It carefully were scaffolding the ideas. Were spiraling back to things that they learned earlier and connecting to that. We're doing the best. We can to deliver and teach that lesson. That's going to reach. Our students emotionally moved them. Promote action memory learning retention. Despite our best efforts, there is always someone who will fail to get. It failed to be teachable. Honestly, they maybe did not arrive open to what was going to happen. And despite our our wild preparation are great effort or even returning and teaching that lesson again. We may still not be able to reach that person. We can't control that outcome. We can control the best that we can put in and the effort that we have to give. We can get to know others we can learn their needs. Meet their needs the best we can. Again, we can't control the outcome. So the first thing was to control what we can control focus on that. The second thing is to keep learning. Every time a marching band performs as a group. The individuals are expected to continue learning their parts and reviewing their place in the pictures that they create on the field when they're marching. So you go through your sets the pictures. You go through your music. You practice in small groups like if I were the trumpet player. My Trumpet Section would continue to practice. In Trumpet Small Groups. We call those same. So, we would have little trumpet sectionals. All year long as we're preparing this show. Move. It also have little sectionals on the field, so that group of People Looks Beautiful Together We would also have large rehearsals of music. And of the drill itself that we're going to march. So we keep learning. We observe other groups and we see. What do they do well? Where did they fail? How can we learn from those things? And then we also do the same with ourselves. What did we do well? We watched the video after the performance. We evaluate ourselves. We become as objective as we can be. So we can spot our weaknesses without any excuses any judgments and he blamed. When I was a band teacher I used to do that I would film every performance? And a day or two after the performance, I would assemble the band and show them this performance. And our guide them through objectively evaluating what they had done and where they could improve. I was always amazed at the depth, sophistication and maturity. Every student would bring to that discussion. There was a lot of analysis. There was a lot of goal setting that happened. None of that could have happened if I simply told them what I saw. But by asking for their observations and their solutions, they continue to learn all the time, so we can do the same thing in our lives in our relationships in our family and our wellbeing in her business, career, teaching and other areas. We can objectively look at our performance. Even if it's just the way, we woke our children up in the morning. We can evaluate it. We can think about what it looked like what the impact was. The effort we gave, and how focused on our goals were. How were we focused on the other people involved? How do we bring out what we are best at? And how do we keep learning? And lastly we can use our strengths. The future is always will be uncertain, but fortunately each of us has strengths that are uniquely designed to help us through this world and through this life. We can continue growing our strengths. Are strengths are gift to us. We can develop them. Grow them increase them. Of course we can overdo our strengths. Oh, we have to also keep learning about that. But, many of our strengths can help us be more resilient. And as we acknowledge what we are good at what we're capable of, and what what our strengths are, we can more fully see maybe what our role is. In a different situation that may come up in the future we can imagine possibilities and determine how we will use our strength to meet those challenges. And, of course, we don't know what the future will look like. But we can think about what we would like to have happen. And what might be different for us if we move forward decisively? Doing the best we possibly can. To keep learning to using our strengths and focusing on what is within our control. I really loved this quote here. From James Clarity, the central work of our lives is to find out and live from the deep mystery of who we are. Taking on the project of unfolding, who we are, and who intend to be or that we were given to be. Life is a gift. We should give have a particular kind of service that. I can bring. Now the service can be in your family and home can be in your relationships in your neighborhood community. In your workplace in your career business teaching. Whatever that is. It's our job to figure out who we uniquely are an applied that all of the situations in front of us especially uncertainty. So the question today I have for you is. Could you do this? Increasing your focus on what you can control. Keep learning and using your strengths. And then will you do this? And the question is. When will you get started? As you think about the marching band metaphor. What is the most important thing you learned today? And where in your life does this lesson make sense? I hope you'll share it with me and also any suggestions or questions. You have about the podcast at Bethany at Dr. be coach Dot. com that's my email address. You're welcome to reach out. And Stop by the website for updated episodes and opportunities I. Wish you all the best and here's to being the best version of you. This has been a podcast called mindset for life by Bethany at Dr Biko Dot Com to me on the web. You can visit my blog or my website at www dot. Doctor BE COACHED DOT COM. That's D R being. Ach Dot Com.

director football Coach Dot US Dr Biko Dot Com Dot. James Clarity seven eight years twenty five years ten minutes
DLD 215: Can Clippy start an engine??

Dots, Lines & Destinations

40:25 min | 2 years ago

DLD 215: Can Clippy start an engine??

"Uh. You're listening to dots lines and destinations travel podcast with host Stephen Seagraves vase, moon and said, Miller. Hello and welcome to episode two fifteen of destinations. This is deaf hosting this week, and I'm joined by fog how you doing. I am willing yourself a little confused. I'm traveling again a little bit, and I'm not entirely sure where I am, but you know, it's good times. Oh, you only if I understand correctly only transit at one time zone, so it could be much worse it could it could that said I did made the mistake slash incredibly smart decision to have food at like three thirty in the afternoon here. So basically destroyed my whole. Scheduling for the rest of the week or at least for the rest of the day. But maybe it'll it's working out well since I'm not actually ravenously hungry while we're recording bonus, you could go drinking. You know that option is available. I think I might just have a quick snack later and Biko hearing from a conference tomorrow where where are you or what conference? It is a blockchain loyalty conference called loyalty lies and I've been invited to speak, yeah, I've been invited to speak on the opposing view team if you will. I see, okay. It was going to say how in the world did you agree to vis? Because they're going to let me tell them. I think they're wrong. I know you do like doing that. What's all every now and then I'd be like telling people, I think they're wrong his trip. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. So my session is on Thursday, a right around the time in this episode should becoming out bother to publish it on time, but yes, so that'll be interesting, but it gives me, I don't know. I sort of shocked that they want it to happen in this way, but it's nice to see a group willing to hear from the other side, I suppose. True anto. Chicago is still lovely. The blue line still is way better than a taxi to get into town. Airbnb doesn't know how to math here. So my room turns out to be about two miles from where I thought it was, which you know is basically like on the other side of town at this point. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, they and the guy when I raise the issue guys comment was, well, you know, we obscure the location for security reasons. It can be up to five miles away. Yeah, that was roughly my responses. Well, I managed to put that into words with a screen shot, showing him with a circle was where the they do that they obscured a little bit put it like radius of a circle of like it'll be somewhere in this general vicinity. And I sent him the link and then put like the screen shot an showed what it was like you guys were this Abadan cost me money now. 'cause you guys screwed up. Don't pretend this is acceptable. They finally admitted its mistake, but of course I'm still stuck here. We stayed minted it. Yeah, I'd also like him being fix it in cover some of my extra taxi costs, whatever. I'm getting over it pretty quickly still paying way less than a hotel, Chicago hotels, like the negotiated rate for our conference was three hundred dollars a night, and that was about the cheapest I could find. Wow. Okay. Yeah, and everything is sold out so I don't even know something be going on that happened other to figure out what but enough of that. Let's talk about something more exciting engine issues. Another week more engine issues. Yeah. So this time eight, eight hundred twenty Neo is having CFM engine issue. So these are a little different, but you know, still bad on this time. I think it was engines where it was in-flight or on the ground engines were shutting down when they weren't supposed to for that part of the story. So there's software upgrade address this apparently and aborted, takeoffs guess in cold weather? Yeah, exciting. And I think the says to do with pharma correctly, icing our water cumulating which is really reminiscent of the old Rolls Royce triple seven engine issues. Yeah, I'm reading it now again, regulators, say water can accumulate and freeze in pressure sensor lines, preventing families from reaching takeoff speeds is on. It's only on the ground not in flight so far is aborted takeoffs basically. Frozen water. They, you know, a pilot light tries up and instead of the family spinning fast enough this something the pressure sensor line tells it, it's going fast enough it, it isn't really, and the plane doesn't really take off that. So here's a question. If this is a software fix, presumably that means they will let the engine something's letting not something's artificially telling the engine, it's at capacity, it's not. So they're going to change that so that it can spin fester, but now does this run into an issue where could cause damage to the engine if it's being measured properly, and also is, does this thing change by the water's actually frozen in the line or not? How does it actually know if it's water? If it's some other issue and a really smart man. Keep telling us that this is why we're having all these issues. All right. Yeah, it is interesting. So, yeah, her a three, twenty Neo family. So yeah, these are the engine. So still not good, but we shall see which is interesting. There was something that popped out last week that Airbus might already be stretching the three twenty one Neo to meet beat Boeing, the middle of the market plant. Yeah, that stores going back and forth for a long time. That one came out of an air Transat event in London. If I remember correctly on air Transat was celebrating however many years they've been flying to London ahead in event at the Canadian embassy in and did a whole big thing. I should some friends who were there. I think. And one of the interviews that came out of it, they said that they were considerate, you know that they've been talking to Airbus about possibly making a three, twenty one, you know, our three, twenty two or whatever it is a longer version of the pencil. To try to get a few more passengers onboard, but is it worth doing these things until you can resolve your engine issues particularly since you will need bigger engines. No, is the short answer to that. I'm not certain you'd need bigger issue are bigger engines versus maybe distance limited or something else. But yeah, I mean, right we every time we have one of these stories about engines. We keep coming back to the same point in the discussion, which is we've made. We've gone from sort of mechanical engines to computer computerize engines and it which is not the old ones didn't have you know, sensors and stuff, but have they gotten too smart? Are we engineering beyond what the mechanics can actually deliver? I think it sort of seems like every time we asked this question, the answer is yes, except for the part where we haven't had a catastrophic failure yet enough to really create issues. You wouldn't call the southwest failure struck. It. Absolutely. And someone died. So yes, but that was the old technology. True, true. Yeah, I guess they're something be said about these things getting caught before it's an issue, right? And you know, right. This is one of those things where aviation super-safe there's all these checks in blah, blah, blah. But are we just lucky, I guess. Well, it's funny because I just read an article yesterday that you know on the monitoring aspect of a delta just signed a deal with Airbus to be their first large customer for this all inclusive monitoring platform. They built guy wise. Which which are way too much Terminator. Hey, you know, let's guy net yet. But it's interesting, you know, even in cars, these things are getting much more and more complicated where they can send so many different things for the question becomes, is it worth the complexity in which which of that data's actionable. And when I talked to the guys who want to do the sort of all the inflation activity vendors wanna he responsible for getting that data off the plane in real time so that they can better act on it. You know, when necessary supposed to only after the plane lands because it's, you know, a lot of data to ship off an airplane and everybody shipping date is gonna pay them for the bits and bytes it really, they all want to do that. But again, you know, it does come down to what of it is actionable. One of it is useful. Where are you ever going to get these answers from? And you know, does, is it too much and the there's a subset of the vendors that have built the onboard servers and their advertising, their ability to handle large amounts of data processing still on the plane. While the other guys are advertising ability to handle it, and you'll get it off the plane and get processing. We have better processing. Abilities on the ground in. It's it's an interesting back and forth who's gonna win that. But yeah, I'm not sure that the right answer is either of those things it's getting until he's got to be a little bit of both, but which data way or picking how to do it is going to be interesting for the industry. I think the way to perfect this represents a nice package is introduced. Microsoft clip, analyze, Stato, clicky, be. I see. You're trying to start an engine. Would you like me to check for frozen water? The pressure sensor lines. See it would make it amusing. Yeah, let's not do that. But short. I. Anyway, also on the narrow. I a single, I'll narrow body world. Boeing is finally clearing out at seven, thirty, seven backlogs. That's nice to see they. You may recall. Our listeners may recall as well or maybe not. They basically over the summer, all of a sudden head shortages of various components from some vendors took over half the taxiways at Renton, which is the airport where they're assembled and parked a bunch of half finished planes because they kept building even if they didn't have all the parts and now they're, they're finally clearing out that backlog. And part of that was hiring back bunch of engineers that they'd laid off. In part of it was some supplier challenges and things like that. But yeah, so they what the numbers eight delivered sixty one in September from twenty nine in July, which huge interest. Now, one of the funny thing is one of the pieces of parts they couldn't get in time few sludge, the few slosh bits with spirit, Aaron ship investment. No, so I'm like, will house that even a real problem because you don't need space if you don't have the few slash. Yeah. Well, the definitely part of if they're also things like the overhead passenger service units that with the button and whatnot that also has the oxygen masks, apparently these supplier production was behind it. You know that we've seen these delays with all sorts of airline programs, but have they gone a little too depend on just in time with? No, no buffer. Of course that and right. So any hiccup causes ripple effects. Usually they have just enough of a pad to help that, but you know, it also becomes a question of what's the, what's the bump? What's the speed bump? What's the, how bad is that thing? Right? If if one vendors behind for a week usually can cover for it, if a vendor's behind for months, it's a lot harder when you're building sixty of these month. It's all of this. I mean, right? We still don't have the engine makers making engines fast enough to be completely reliable all the time to meet the current goal of production rates and both Boeing Airbus keep talking about trying to increase their production rights. One of the things that I was reading in the Boeing articles, that leap is still behind some of the engines. So they're still, they still have some delays because they're not getting engines festival, Heather. I don't. I would assume that there are still problems on that front. I haven't looked into the details enough recently. No show. But you know, who does have engines is Delta's to twenty. That's great. Then schedule for the series did its first flight earlier this month, and delta is confident enough in the delivery schedule for the first few frames that they published a schedule. You can go front inaugural. No. My problem with the inaugural is twofold. It is on a Thursday morning at six AM out of LaGuardia. I'm so six. AM LaGuardia is a problem just as a general rule of thumb. And then the second problem is the very first flight is just of Boston. So it's only like thirty minutes in the air. It's just not enough time to celebrate and explore and get a feel for how the systems all work, test everything I'll play it cetera. Your other options, Dallas, which is just never exciting place to go. Yeah. But also mentioned this at six AM. Just wanna sleep. You don't wanna play. Right? So an, it's the irony of courses that I Boston's my new airport now, so it would be a good thing for me to do is go down the night before and then fly to Boston. But instead I'm actually going to Dallas, I'm gonna do Dallas to LaGuardia and then continue to Boston on a different to twenty couple of good. Yeah, it was interesting. They, it appears that Delta's going to launch service with three ready to go, wow, are starting to admit LaGuardia on a Dallas. And so one is going gonna go back and forth on the schedule between Dallas or in Boston and LaGuardia all day. I think they've blocked at basically ninety minutes. Okay, a thirty five minute flight. So that's. That tells you everything you know about LaGuardia, and then they've got it set to do six terms, I think are six, six hundred or six trips. It's doing a lot. My little spreadsheet here, six flights, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, eight flights back and forth all day. And then the other two planes wanna go LaGuardia, Dallas and then backed Gordon back to Dallas in the third will do Dallas, the Gordon, Dallas. So those disorder Stagich other. So what do you think Dallas Dallas is one of the first markets that will be all a to twenty currently mix of mainline and regional, right? And they are targeting business travelers. They have made a big deal about this aircraft. Having the widest seats in Konami. It's gonna have to KU fleet wide. It's gonna have in seat entertainment system that is the newest of the new that's built off of tablets. And it's a whole lot of questions about how well that's going to work. But yeah, there's, there's a lot going on there, but it is. Dallas is one of the routes that's going to be entirely douse. Laguardia's gonna be an entirely a to twenty route to begin with. And so you know why? Because they're trying to compete against American and southwest in some regards. Yeah, but the Dallas love versus the w Scher. But yeah, it's they picked markets that are competitive and they've got a couple other routes that they're doing that sort of exclusive transition. I think Houston to LaGuardia is also maybe. Okay. Going to switch to that. I'll double check by. It's, you know, there's, there's a couple routes that they really do in candidate made it clear from the this is a business plane on people talking about using it as utilization, flying, and some other weird things. And that is not at all what Delta's doing delta is going aggressive in terms of where it's putting this thing and trying to capture new business. So. Yeah, I I like the series Sasha to twenty times. Times I've been very nice. I'm very interested to see what happens with Delta's version of it because you know the the Swiss version is one thing, but is actually putting in real business class seats. For example, our first class seats not does euro biz they're doing a couple of interesting things. So. Oh, yeah. LaGuardia, Houston in Houston to Salt Lake will also be a to twenty only eventually is that are they doing to prompt yet there too. Yeah, it'll be interesting to see how that works. I mean, arguably in less space than the one to you get an euro biz but the seat is actually wider as opposed to just two blocks next to you so win. Some lose what are the two twenties displacing the delta site? Do they stop MD's? They do it's, but mostly the two twenty displacing seventy five at a replacing fifties. So it's seven thirty sevens or replacing the eighties. So there's a lot of Gaijin going on Delta's main, should they hit their numbers and then some for last quarter. They announced that last week also had another record profit kind of thing, going on metric, true record or just a lot of money, but well, over billion dollars in profit again. And this time around one of the big numbers they tossed out was that they saw nineteen percent increase in premium cabin revenue. Discreet for the airline sucks, frequent flyers if you were hoping for an upgrade, yes. If you're willing to spend a not necessarily agree, just amount of money in some cases for a premium cabin seat, you know, three hundred dollars from Dallas, Boston or Dallas still Guardia. One way in first class is not the end of the world. So in most markets premium, the difference between offers cost seat and economy seat of these domestically is really in the grinder scale next compared to what it used to be somewhere between one hundred two hundred dollars on average. At what point does that delta increase not no pun intended, but it would point does it? Does it gap increase to be more substantial. What's the tipping point short and I think we will find out, right. I mean, I bought premium cabin for this inaugural because I wanted the space to work because it was cheap enough if it was four hundred dollars, I wouldn't have right, but three hundred. So I did. And that was against a hundred twenty in coach. Decided I six hours worth of fly time onto flights on event today. I would pay thirty dollars an hour for a little more space, and that's generally the decision matrix that I go through the the big thing is if I need to work, it's really hard to work in coach these days unless you have an empty seat next to you. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. So yeah, that's going to be a fun inaugural. It's gonna be really interesting to given the number of different sort of inaugurals actually happening to see how Alpa manages or if delta manages to celebrate all of it all at once. I will point out. There's one flight a LaGuardia, Austin firm of a one way at ten AM that needs to be a two twenty to keep the schedule moving in currently is not so expect that to change actually. They did book as an inaugural is the United seven. Eight. Ten. Oh, exciting. Yeah. Are you in Polaris? Of course, you know, of course here we are talking about, should you pay for I or not. I did not pay for I. I actually. Certificate nice had are open. So why not? Yeah, that's a great deal, especially since regionals are more or less going away. We talked about that last week. Changes other inaugurals, Newark, Singapore, Rinaldo, or Singapore? Newer, it's happening. It's running now? Yeah, it's a long time on a plane. Still long coming plane has that has not changed. I'm. Saw from the events looked pretty good. I will say both directions had WI fi problems which gives me pause. If you're really your goal is the premium passenger who is very time sensitive willing to pay to get there faster because their time is worth that six years ago, they would sort of maybe okay without life. I can't imagine this people are going to be okay with crappy wifi today and for seventeen hours. It's one thing to have to our fight with crappy life as a whole different thing that seventeen with crappy wifi. And you know, I, I don't know if they should have like worked with the vendor Panasonic system. I don't know Panasonic to get more bandwidth just for that one flight. I don't know if even can. I mean, obviously you can, but there's some challenges to doing it depending on where the plane is flying in what hardware is installed and all sorts of other things on the Singapore departure. The plane stayed within range the whole time. I think on the Newark departure, at least on the inaugural went polar. So it was actually even out a service range for a couple of hours. So that certainly things but even like the first three hours or so, the flight was weird things like some of us we're talking about like the plane took off and you would have expected to see a lot of social media posts, and they were nothing right word. So anyway. How boring is Americans new logo yawn. Well, are you saying that on your own behalf on behalf of the United States patent trademark office? I'm it from my own perspective. Yeah, I don't. I'm not sold on it. I think I certainly don't like the tail, but that's a whole different problem. I actually do understand the sort of affect they're going for with the eagle and the red and blue strike. I don't mind that at all necessarily. I'm a little surprised that they was declared not trademark label. Set is surprise in some ways. It's surprising to me is some ways. It's not, and I think art of what I think part of the challenge years timing. 'cause you know logo design in these things all have patterns, right? So if you're first two, I of the gate, you'll get it right. As you become a follower, you will not get a trademark protection. I think that's what Americans really struggling with. And so they've taken, you know, they, they applied three years ago. They got rejected. They applied again. They got rejected again and now they decide to sue the patent office. Yeah. If at first you don't succeed, try a lawsuit. And you know it's great that they're so concerned about their brand identity yet. The Brennan density doesn't exist from an onboard experience or a customer perspective is really like, it makes me wonder about the priorities. Because they haven't gotten consistent on board. You mean they have so many other problems right now that there were. They're throwing money at this logo problem when they have. I actually just American trip this weekend and it was mediocre pest, yeah, and it was. It was inconsistent district was supposed to fly Charlotte, affiliate Japan. It was a ten fifteen departure. Inbound was coming from Hartford at let's ten fifteen about nine thirty. They decided to finally delay the flight delayed inbound aircraft which was a two hour inbound flight. So they had known for some time. They don't for some time. They just didn't choose to do anything about it until the very last moment when you can't find any alternates. And of course, at flight eventually left an hour and fifteen minutes, late hour and a half late. Ouch. Yeah, that's us. A problem with the Brandon co. That's just a problem with the companies in inability front operations, but I think it reflects on the company. It's where the priorities are right now rather than you know. A lot of people are saying you, you can see it in their stock, right? Their stock is faltering. It's a pretty much a four or five year low. When the other two stocks are closer their high end in from a fifty two week perspective. And so clearly the market's losing confidence in American, their ability execute. They're really, they're haphazard arc board approach on route trae now, and I think it's all starting catch up with them and they're so focused on silly things like the logo. Yeah, that's fair. I mean. Part of me this in some ways goes back to like, why are you still focus on marketing efforts if you can't run your operation. Right. And we've, we've talked about that with United for a while. You still sort of do have to keep focus on perations. You do have to do it, but I get, I get the at the end of the day, the best marketing you're ever gonna have is word of mouth. So if you keep the people, you have happy, they will promote for you. If you make them disenfranchised, they, you're gonna have a much bigger uphill battle to conquer that. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if you saw the story or not remember a year year and a half ago, American gave everybody unsolicited raise in hopes of making all their employees happy. It turns out it didn't work. I mean, it's funny. I think they're labor problems, right? Are worse than United continental ever was. Wow. Statement I stand by it. Yeah, I can't argue it. I haven't paid enough attention. Probably flying them on Thursday, so we'll see how my experiences. I mean, I'm really excited for that limited time offer for new credit cards. Oh yes, which won the Barclays, our city card or both. Do both. Now on the planes I'm been on, they only do the Barclays onboard. They do city like the rules are really weird. Like the city wants. Barclay's has airport and on board except near an admiral's club within a certain radius where only city can do it 'cause that people on memberships are bigger spenders. Those the track customer. Right. Awesome. You have to have rules like that. Otherwise, it gets I, I understand that I, let's talk security. Let's say, hypothetically, you're an airport operator, and you have, you know, security rules in processes for managing how people come and go and dignitaries and things like that. Would you load all those details onto a USB stick and just give out copies everybody, you know, not everybody, you know, maybe just employs involved. New things that could be like, you know, a data breach specially when someone loses one of those USB sticks in the parking lot, and a random person picks it up and discovers all of the details about throws operations. The story came out actually a little while ago. I think the year to go now that the data was actually leaked and whoever found it was mostly responsible with it didn't call, didn't does not appear to cause any real problems, but he throw got find like one hundred twenty grand or something like that. Which you know the question is, is that an appropriate fine for that loss day? Because if I remember correctly, it had details on their security procedures as well as things like building layouts stuff. Yeah, it was how like what to do when the Queen is here. Right? And I felt there was some other who all. All the people who work those different security hills are and he does about them so which is generally not published information. So if if you were you know a bad actor trying to influence our tack or whatever you would want to find an inside. Our gives you a list of the people to target things like that. Just not good. I mean, I just don't know how you make such a fundamental mistake. Yeah, putting things on putting things on, you'll see stick said should've to me. I think part of is right in this is a bigger problem with data integrity data. So easily moves around now because of things like USB sticks. In people need to be, you know, we don't have really good controls on data as a whole as society had you address that. Part of it is education and start, you know, helping people understand what they can and cannot do because there have been all sorts of instances where people throw something in the USB stick to take home to work under at home, which is fine. But you know, it's if you're taking a document, that's fine. But why would you take all these plans on what to do in the queen's round? Yeah, I had sort of where I get to as well. Remote access systems generally sock, but. And before we go into IT conversation, I'm gonna stop. Yeah. I don't know on. Let's come back to the side of the Atlantic DHS shared this link, and I have some additional thoughts on except talk to some of the people involved, but one of you start with that mall, try. Basically the ditch us has now said that there's there have a mandate of, I think, twenty twenty or twenty twenty one where they want pictures of every air traveler leaving the country and which is fine. But they want the airline to cooperate their line and the airports, and they are lines and they want also want the airlines and airports of foot the Bill and as an enticement to get them to foot the bills with their. Allowing is letting the airlines and airports use that data for commercial purposes. Yeah. So I have to sort of anecdotes all share related in this one is at Boston today in the sort of United side of terminal b, who are spirit in some of the American fights also out of they were doing the new drivers license gain. Okay. Scan your right in. It automatically checks against the various PNR's departing from our serving manifesto departing from that part of the building to see if you're on the list at validates the ideas actually real in all those other things, it's one of the sort of connected ide- scanner systems as opposed to all those barcode scanners historically were not connected at all to any data sources. They just read a barcode and translated it. So that's part of this into sort of the biometric world on the other part of it is in the last month or so. I've spoken to DHS ANC officials about how they're implementing this and some of what they're doing. Pretty cool. Like the. Similar to how DHS's building these profiles of like the flight manifest. CV is doing the same thing in one of the big problems they used to have with their their photo. ID, biometric facial recognition stuff was they have a huge database in hundreds of millions of photos to compare against because they have the entire US passport collection plus everybody who flies inbound who they photographed or who they acquired the digital image up from passport from a country that's willing to share, and it was too much scan against and then they realized that they could do a similar thing where they could create a subset of photos against just the departing flights at that time or the arriving flights, depending on where which checkpoint it's at. And it actually went spectacularly fast and his far more accurate than fit a customs agent, looking passport picture, looking at the person signing, they match. So there is some good that comes of it, right? If you can get through immigration faster, that's good news. If you get it accurate, that's good news unless you're trying to cheat. But the the interesting part to me at that point would when h s was talking about that same program, they are both on stage at the same time. One of the things they said is we can't do it for domestic. 'cause we don't have enough photos yet and what that comes down to is they don't have enough not enough passengers are in realize compliant states or places where that data shared or whatever it is. They don't have enough. They don't have a large enough photo database or the domestic stuff. And for the international stuff, we'll have to see. They are actually pretty good, but they don't. And it's hard to know where that's gonna play out in the end. But you know if they're trying to get someone else to pay for it by letting Bill into the commercial side, I will say that during the conversation I heard it one of the conferences, DHS people sort of hinted at some of that, and it was. It sounded to me like it wasn't going to be something they do now that they're actually talking about it again. Maybe it is, and that's unfortunate. But. There is absolutely a creepy factor and some others privacy concerns about some of the biometric facial recognition stuff. But if you can actually get people through security and through Gration lines, three times faster, it's hard for me to worried about that. Well, you know, the reality is in this if you the government already has all the stuff that I want to write the thrilled about it or not. That's really not discussion the, I think the bigger problem is letting the airlines airports use it for commercial purposes. Yeah, because that's a very vague definition and there's really no limitations to it about right because the problem is the as an example rate. So it airlines and airports are, you know, all these companies have a little disclaimer in there comes in conditions that they your, they will show your data with their business partners. While the reality is their business could be data consolidator who's then taking those pictures on the Senate shirts selling to Westfield. To scan you every time you walk near them all. Yeah, and that's the, that's the bigger concern and they don't really. They don't give you a way out of it. That is absolutely concerned. That's a problem. And I agree with you completely that I don't like going into the commercial side. I just from the actual issues side. I don't get worked up about it. So it's we'll have to see. And I think like most of these things by the time we know it's actually happening. It'll be to stop it right. That's us. Yeah, two quick route discussions. If we can Hilton Head. Hilton Head on a lot of others. Yeah, United your grouts not. We are smaller cities United spending, big on Hilton Head. So Chicago Dulles, Newark k, maybe them sure that there's business there, but in the moving, some more, their Newark feet, arrests Dulles. So I think Myra Lexington in Manchester New Hampshire or the three that are moving to from Newark. You know, I think the feet moving the into Dulles over Newark way. Not too surprising actually will probably be better in a lot of ways Dulles, less weather, prone incident, Pronin congested. If you're not going to Europe anyways, you know some decent options. They're, but well, it's interesting, right? They have a lot more lift out of Newark than Dulles. The questions will some of those secondary cities move as well. Yeah, that that is a good question. I think now that we have integrated flight attendants, I think we'll start to see some of that stuff reevaluated you make your member like they moved on the seven, six force to Dulles a year ago and then had to move him back because they couldn't be crewed by Dulles Bates. Flight attendants are not enough Dallas baseline attendants right. Hutton base at Dulles was too small. And I think part of that was also just operational reliability, Newark yapper. So reliability went out the window when they did that was operational, or was it crew base though? It was operational. Seven, six threes just became a disaster? Yeah, interesting is 'cause like their secret tricks to maintaining the middle of the guys down in Dallas to deal with. I think it's just a matter of that. People are a little more lax, not as aggressive as they are here, and they pack them into much here. They basically converted the majority of the international schedule European scheduled two, seven, six, three. So when going wrong, everything was going wrong. Yeah, so it's not good when three of your four evening Dallas flight Heathrow flights are all have all gone sideways. There's no way to make up for that. But the really bizarre and the other thing that one thing that United didn't mention the press release, but the quietly did overnight is dropped Hamburg from the summer schedule. Yeah. So no more homework, but the really bizarre one that I can't understand is LA the Madison Wisconsin. Did you forget what that is yet? Doesn't really matter. I mean, I agree with you. We have discussion, you know, previous. LA is not a big enough connecting hub for United, and so that I mean, maybe we'll get a few passengers here in their connecting, but who are they gonna connect? They are. They couldn't have connected over San Francisco instead. Right. And what is what is the local traffic draw on that route? San Francisco would make much more sense because of all the international. Yeah. I mean, I haven't looked at two hundred eighty to see what the number of people flying between Madison LA is on a daily basis, but I got not a lot. I went to look at United to see what the plane was. I put my search respond requests and I hit submit his access tonight. Oh, exciting. If they don't want to sell tickets. Yeah, website Solomon really. Don't get me started. Of rally up a little bit. The last routes discussion real quick. Wow, errors cutting a few of its secondary slash tertiary cities next year. I think he's told me Cleveland Saint Louis in Cincinnati, all the ones that started this year. I think Saint Louis was year around Cleveland and Cincinnati were seasonal. They're not coming back in Saint Louis ends in January and. Fuel prices are up man. There I mean between this and I, you know, Premera few weeks ago is this like the Dave reckoning of ultra low cost carriers across the Atlantic. I certainly think we will see slower growth and the airlines being much more careful about which routes they choose. I mean earlier this year Icelandair CEO resigned over poor financial performance based in large part on the transatlantic operations. So there has been a lot of fallout from the last, you know, eight, nine, ten months of transatlantic low-cost carrier operations. It'll be interesting to see. Like you say today, reckoning is it over the other one to consider Norwegian is cancelling kaplowitz Edinburgh service and Belfast cancelled a lot of those transplants. I guess part of the question become storage gonna do with those planes because they bought all these thirty seven access to do a lot of those types Arauz. Well, some of them are going to Argentine. I know they started. They just launched their Argentina service. I ain't does actually with seven. Three. It's not the max, but yeah, Argentina started this week. Exciting. Yeah. Their fifth or six. Six. The market where they do domestic surface crazy just quickly growing. Yeah, but also not making money. Who needs make money eventually. And some government bailed him out. The interesting to me is that while of all of them is just funded by a guy, like it's his money, it's not even like a consortium or anything else. Maybe he did Richard Branson branches advice from your school. You know if you wanna be minute are started. Billionaire start nearly. Yeah. LA to medicine isn't e seventy 175 by the way, but still. Yeah. So it's not a ton of seats. It still it is an interesting route tries. We'll have to see how that develops the longtime on one seventy five. Well, I mean, is it doing like Toronto to Houston, which I imagine is probably just as long if not longer after Houston's, probably long that is really long fight. Houston, math, no Houston, twelve eighty Elliott. Madison. Sixteen eighty seven. Okay. Houston, other Houston to Toronto at one point was on an forty five. That's when we were like all about how stupid that was like Houston Bakersfield. Yeah. Still have like pains from that one. Just thinking about it. I never did it, but still. Yeah. Alrighty. What's next destination for you? It's worth talking about anything coming up. I think I'm going to Chicago next week here. That's the extent of my excitement for the moment. Home for a few weeks and just laying low. Sweet. That sounds like fun. I will. I wish I could say the same shadow this week, China next week LA the week after getting from from New Hampshire to Los Angeles via China, seem like a good idea at the time. I'm sure I will feel otherwise when I have to do it always seems like a good idea at the time. Yeah. Depends details. I am toying with Eddie of jumping on the last Dulles, not Dallas love national flights on Alaska next week. Because they are officially ending on the as the iodine schedule shifts. Yeah, metrics, they're transitioning those lots of south last, right? He I'm surprised they give the national ones. Did they give if the nationals or just LaGuardia ones? Both, they don't wanna fly eastbound out of love anymore basically, but I'm just surprised they gave up the slots just leased not lease, not granted so they can. I take back whenever the one where I'm saying, I'm surprised they just fly somewhere else. They can. It's both of those airports are primitive rule limited. 'cause I forgot because they have all these exemptions for national, right? But the the slots question, we're not exempt may. I am surprised that the just didn't choose to do one stop service somewhere in the middle of the country, not in Dallas, but what do I know? Yeah. Yeah, lots of things, but apparently not this one, so. All right. Well, thanks for the chat today. Thanks listeners tune in once again, you can find us online at dots lines on Twitter or more dots four lines dot com. On the interwebs Louis comments, leaves feedback, ask us questions. We do love answering them. Your questions are usually better than the random probably come up with the talk about. So we like hearing from you if you wanna hear the episodes a little earlier just by beer from time to time, I hit us up on patriots. We like that too, and have a great trip. Take care.

Dallas Delta LaGuardia Boston Dulles Houston Chicago Airbus Boeing DHS United States Newark United Airbnb LA Biko Stephen Seagraves
THE MOVIE REVIEW EXTRAVAGANZA - 07 - 08 - 2020

Double Toasted

3:07:45 hr | 7 months ago

THE MOVIE REVIEW EXTRAVAGANZA - 07 - 08 - 2020

"David Martin Segma-. Kleenex. Up GOING ON, everybody, welcome to the Extravaganza Mars happy be hit. Sexist muscles. Orange and bright sunshiney no citrus Thomas. I, do man. I use the prize Musudan. Said Hey y'all during the day. Tomorrow will be here on Thomas. Tonight we got. So for you and he said movies went happening. If they are yeah, man. No, they are. They are some people. Some people upset that they are happening in which they want them to happen. Tom Hanks. Corona everything. He cried about this movie. Buddy seeing greyhound big screen with. All nobody wants to make Tom Hanks Mad. That tonight. See. Screen. Right way these. You say oh you. Know Oh. We ran into a little bit of. Rand deliberated trouble trying to get screened tomorrow Denison. Oh, I'll listen. No. You. Listening to the opposite of what I say all, but you know what you did. See this other movie. sometimes always never. Yes. I saw that right before guy. Okay Yeah. Going back to independent films. Everybody wants to hear about the nobody goes. On the well, keep asked us about movies out of those. You know what I'm saying. I know I know I know they say. Hey, you guys want review. This looks interesting sure. Hey guys check out this movie Pass! You know they say hey, guys you go in. You're GonNa Review this movie because it looks interesting, I mean I ain't GonNa see. But I listen to Y'all talk about it, so yeah, folks. We'll talk about this independent British independent film that came out. It came out in a few places before, but I think it went the ethical on some other places like maybe the U. K.. You know of course biggest cities net Mallya L. new. York, yeah, of course, and and then I think did the festival route also as a bonus today on and think we would have too much, but. The boys season two. Oh, that's right. And Home Katrina. That so love the show Oh with season. Two's on the way I heard that and they dropped a trailer for, did they? Have you seen? Have not I guess when you say did dated. Della Luna, thank you, thank you, so folks. We got a lot of things to do and man I had a dream. I went to the theater for a movie premiere. Got There was all excited. And, when even thinking about it and then bright before walking in I was like wait. I can't go in there. What the Hell am I doing here? This was a full. It was partially full like this inside trump air. It's a theater so i. don't know what kind of distancing. They're practicing the not going to be. There Khairnar came. Don't attach them at the front. I didn't get that. It might even a critic screening, but I was just so like like so happy only to go like wake up out of it like not actually wake up within my dream going on what the hell! No, I can't do this. Yeah, man! How were you thinking you've been what you dream? About gardening you know better in. Doing. Or not doing social social dream in. Spring Coronas. and. You'LL DRINK Freddie Krueger fucking people as I'll get you out to the vaccine. I ain't doing nothing right? Now was better than my dream that I had last week was I was having sex with Having pseudo sex with a rod rentals wife who was not blake lively. What he gets. He was obviously cheat. Now there was some Going on. Yeah more. What's worse? Me having sex with another man's wife are US brand corona out there. Oh, man! I got this taken a male today in the email speaking of Ryan Reynolds. And it said Hey, you've been invited to. A tasting a vodka, Avia aviation vodka gin tasting with Ryan Rentals I was like. Oh, well, we'll shit right on. Hold on. Is this going to work because it's putting on my total wine and it's like Oh easy. You come by total wine and buy a bottle of aviation gin, and then when you ask home when you computer. Reynolds will drink it with you on zoom. Call with everybody. Does it Kinda cool? I guess. You. Try to play this down getting. Your zoom co around rose drinking. That's the new happy hour. Jesus man. Is Robert is going to be I. Don't know if he's there say he's their. People welcome to the cell. He this man. He's turned his nose. With however, many people well, let's just say that you're on there. And how how many people on a zoom call at one time? I think. We did one with twenty people. Man That's like being at a not even a party. That's like being at a dinner. With Ryan Reynolds Man. The world's MOST AWKWARD DINNER BUT! I, don't you sit there pretend because there's no way you would do. You would not I would do this. Man My skin me again. I will forward it to you because it's not like it's exclusive to me I will how? I look at is like all right. This is not exclusive. This is whoever is on the total wine mailing lists. Get this, I. You know what? GimMe the invitation also son I'll come back and report to you okay. Man It was prerecorded. Iran rentals. Base for drinking mush in. You fucking idiot. Did you really think I was going to be here? Don't you stupid? Now? Dressed up like deadpool's. I mean plus when you go to a tasting. They're giving you samples. Does not like. Show up and buy your own shit and then hey, get on the on the call so I can tell you thank you sucker what I mean. But it's not always if you go to a tasting Ron Reynolds, is Thanksgiving you? Okay. He's not going to be. Giving it to me now that tell you about the invitation I got. This chicken Ron Ronald was going to be that. They say is. No. Man Look. Man Listen! No breath probably GONNA be a setup is probably going to be like even if he is probably be something like hey, Gus, thank for Drinking Gin by what? got. Exactly Shit that doesn't get the hang right, or it'll be like an while I'm here I'll take a few questions. It's GonNa be idiot questions. Know that you know how QNA's go boy of course it'll be idiot questions. Drunk. Of G. Knocking sticking around long enough for people to get drunk. You'll be there for the first SIP. Man Semi that invitation I'm very curious to see. Okay L. will be having a virtual happy hour with dead poo. That sounds awesome man. Should there he is waiting on, you look. You know everybody I'm here. I'm just waiting on Thomas. Really has some question for that guy like show. Marin you are. Over or You WANNA hang out and don't want to hang out with pool. Man, and you call yourself a comic book Geek Man. Get outta here would. Drink. Drink okay, you do it, even Japan. Is My Asti. Jen is my least favorite. I mean it can be good. I discovered that the more expensive stuff is good. If you mix, it was mix it yeah. They gave me a hangover drink I was. Much I need to stop drinking. Angle in a bar the knicks. I was at the bar saying. What can you do for a hangover? They probably said we'll get the fuck out the buffers stop. Down as funny. What else do. You put in a fucking glass. Drink out of it. No shut the fuck of Gimme a drink for hangover and they recommended. They say we got I. Forgot what it was. It was a real speaking of sitcoms comb hat. alchemy ended up till Zahadeh. What's we'll see you guys a little bit? But it was a it was a very citrusy type during fruited drinking, but it was gin and man I like all right. This is good. No I've been to some art openings where it's been sponsored by a forget. The company's not great babied. No. They, make some good drinks. IRA! KYW came over from Denmark. Gave me some some gin with elderberry in it and it with fever tree, tonic water and I was like Holy Shit you completely. About elderberry from the fever, what mythical fantasy book because this man? I came from Denmark. Berries L. Debater mythical twelve in the Jin from the middle. What tree were no? No fever tree is a brand of. Ginger beer and tonic water, so it's it's a higher in, and it's not super sweet. Okay, so right had the fever tree. The retrea tonic water mixed with the the elderberry infused Jenson okay, knows to together was delicious. You talking about elderberry served from the Fiba Tree. Mixed Elf now who? Is. Show. Where you? Would've mythical pump somewhere? Hang doors this. Go on a journey. I WANNA quit, but came back with this was this gene? Will you. Got To go slay dragons. Yeah Man I want this. I want to see this invitation I'm GonNa Tell You why a med. You turned down its invitation because you've got a coup email. I'm still getting some backwards as emails. Man Like what I'll show you I'm glad you brought a bus. Show you this. They still try to pull this shit on me like I'm stupid. They some nineties Conman Shit on me man. Yeah! Is that that prince from Nigeria whenever he's not Jerry imprint see? He's bag man and started with me. Let me going with Chat Chatto Chet. How you doing much fans out there chat babies. High are doing the Oji chat. He made them crime whereas. You. said it. Oh. Welcome og chat! Bring up the visuals in the. I don't know what that is the. Freddie Krueger Guinea pig. But I like it though and the side Bitch Ken. How you doing side bitches. Who is a cross Gamer HD was upside bitch? Julian how you doing the street AGGRIPA history degree life was going on anger Asian, still man cartoon muppet. The wizard kingdom, though it is the wizard king. L. To ban how! Be retrieved. CAST fake cares faith. Thank you I. Don't think I've seen you here before cast, but if you knew. Thank you for being here. Welcome work everybody the Nick, lousy coming in with the salt. How you doing Nick Lousy. Nick did I get your. Address because I pull something aside for you of Smithson off some stuff, people should be getting shirts from me. A Synopsis on Marie, but I need your address, so please send it to me. And you know where to send it, but if not I, remind you a little bit later. Della Luna saying. Thank you nick losing. On the Double toasted chip Fan, behalf. He said I have said it to you. Exhibit again and. Let's see. Stop losing it low, low, low, low servant awesome accent. Austin, thank you. Thank you how you doing drama. There US right there. Alpha Alpha. G Goes Budget Rodham Oh. Stay fly man. Stay fly man. Buck workum. James Cool James, Luther. To sweet seven, hundred, ninety seven Bonnie. Golden skippy. Spying on me, but I like Golden Skinny, All. Gain Geeta overhear with the subs. Thank you for the gift of subs right. They appreciate the man ready depreciate. Oh Shit. Say Jay. Ready to head. On newsradio Hi to beat a speed is to admit. Ready, all these. Oh. You said before. Call the manager. I'M GONNA put. Raisins up here California raising. These girls line. Here Cousteau's. They always finally. Righteous Green, Vegas, stop and. Look at. Them hips going that man and joking. United in the. Oil Welcome. Tom Hanks. Sex the Obama captain. America Who that is that black deadpool patches up? Folks let me saw. Soda Today we got. Greyhound? Start America's. Tom Hanks. Also. Liked boys season one was season two. Dropped trailer for you to. Be Talking about that. They, said man. What about the arts? Used to be the arts. The art terms that is in. Talking about sometimes always never. was able to. Get, it. That's amount. Oh. He's what is probably better stop. What is he? Swallow his little torch tongue right now. Oh, get it most getting. Crack me up with these gifts Soviet, but don't ever stop. Don't ever stop with that. Thank y'all. Thank y'all today. Man, really do appreciate it. As I said today have great how Tom Hanks. Ship blowing up movie we also have. By mackinac stay away from World War Two. He must be having flash. Mister World War. That would be funny. He's PT as the from being. War, movies. Meghan do another. He should've been captain America. The boys, the trailer season two. Getting Ready for when it up in September and going to be talking about some of the smaller movies that are out there today we're GonNa Start with sometimes always never got a bunch of movies that are independent films coming people's way and you can look for those in the future, but tonight you can look forward to that one. Baby. Baby late they'll stop that. Stop shaking. Don't shake a baby. The baby's feeling it. Don't stop me now. Baby found cocaine. No stop makes those. Dose. Oh Shit. Woody rated the have a dance battle. Should Black Laszlo Madame me Louis. Come on with it. Yeah, come on, getting should. That black is like he's like. He's like man. I lost I got served going to lick my wounds. got beat by big toy. Oh folks. somebody said. Are you guys going to review the outpost? That's a movie on Netflix. I am happy to say that we have a Netflix's connection now. So. We probably start reviewing shows I have an electronic. Cram all this shit in in one day. Yeah, a whole weekend so good good! Hey, okay, well, then who needs the movies? I'm telling you man. I gave up on movies long time ago mark. Move is off a sucker. Streaming New Kushida. Folks is GonNa be a fun show though. Martin was still a free man. He know movies knowing all exist. A fake as You. Wouldn't even his head yeah. Even looking at. CAMP, was bigger than. They should have black hair. Would like fingernail Polish so to woman's hand. Oh. Konterman N- thank you. Thank you for the subscription right there? Subscribe to two one six months. Appreciate that. Thank you, yes sir. All right. Are we talked to the people in the chair. Welcome once again. And, for the people can get Nian right now. So I'm burping up the. Chinese food. What did you get chicken and Broccoli? Would Assad a hot and sow was. They ain't funny. It's the way you said. It's like Chris Tucker. To get your sweetness our. Racist. Even got to see. because. You know cost I'll call racism metal any en sure at the time even to think about like he say that. He said they nobody call. They should up I mean they do now back then back, thanks. I remember I laughed at that and I was like I'm laughing one because the way you said it was funny. Looking for your stability over your sweet and sour chicken. You can't do that. Became who I've been looking for your chicken? You went like this. Is Not right no golf for. But that was the whole. Point of that movie. Sometimes I should be getting mad at Blake. said, I mean. You know what I tell you what you go ahead. You had your jokes, I'm won't take this corner and you'll. Store. Would you think about that? Had Out. Dan seat very well. Whoever hit Serb? You hit a so hard my bag fill over. Mark Little scary to. The power to. Marcy. Bag Fill over I'm dead. What. Dog Spirits hearing. Solid chicken. You know what? That's the spirit of that character. We talked math and we'll kick your bag. Bitch C. J. Eric. Thank you. Thank you for the celebrate their appreciate that You can still find it on. Looking for your sweet and sour chicken is. Sweden sour among put swings hours. Yep! Tech you. Know Time I popped up first thing. Like advertising this shit like they proud of that line. Been Looking everywhere for your, you'll and salad chicken ass. and. Isn't that right Let's see here. You can't do that shit today. No, no, we were watching that movie plant thing last year re watching it and I was like it's funny, but you could never. This movie can never play House now. City Council rush hour at this point. See y'all can't go castle and everything. 'cause I'M GONNA. Be Some left out there. That's what I'm saying all this canceled. Really is really. Looking for your sweet and sour chicken eggs. I didn't even know how he stressed that out and. Sweet and sour chicken. That He. May should let him know that. This was nice racist rate. y'All sweet and sour chicken a S. Yeah I've been looking for your sweet and sour chicken. Play here is was actually ordering Shit. Yeah let me get the sweet sour chicken ass. Sat a penis. Because, that's what you mean. You don't mean any more to me than a menu item. Sweeps chicken as I mean what he was the beggar. He digs forgave it. Yeah, he did kill some people. FORGOT THERE! Has An accent. A not not really seen some shows. No, he's been. He was lost. He was a matter of fact. That's right. Yeah, yeah! He was a major character on loss in the later seasons. and. I was watching. I, pulled out the squid and the whale which I forgot what year that came out. Way Old he was in that he played a therapist in it. I was like Jeez remember him and he had no accent in that movie. Yeah, I saw him in a show reason that we had no accent. So, he was in lost yeah yeah well Chris talk about is. Looking for your sweet and sour chicken eggs remember island fucking. Racist would. You found my fucking. Fantasy. Island is to call me a goddamn learn. Now see if you turn around and call him a nigger he'd be. decided that. I know how dare you sir. You just call me sweet sour chicken. dish. What you? Should I. See here the email. Mysterious email you got so Martin. Come and tell me man. I got an invitation to go. Drake would Ryan Reynolds and I saw. Man. Why are you? Why would you come in Handy? Do you know I'm a busy man? I can call him up anytime. I don't need to do that right now. Assuming the invitation I'll go hang with. MAC getting emails from. Ryan Reynolds Man Meanwhile I'm getting emails from the Nigerian Prince. This shit here, let me see. Maybe say, don't don't. Twist don't show people's emails, but this is a fucking con person right here so I don't think no matter. By this. Let me see there it is. Business Cooperation. Could have been in on a business cooperation and you blew it in blue. Look at this. Look at this shit here. I'm a regional. I thought this was done. I thought people I don't think anybody at all. Maybe even old people I don't think anybody who was left on this planet to be dumb enough to fall for shit like this, but apparently I guess they thought I was the one. Trying to catch a slipping. Let me see here. This. Is the email I got? From J.. J. Biko. Biko. BBDO God. Oh, my money go! Mr J, Biko says. Good day, kindly treat this information confidentially. I. Don't WanNa. Know How rip your domain so. We go. Just so you know this is offers legit. This is just between you and me. A smart man. Why would tell anybody else's hey, buddy come in? Sh-. My name is Charles J Biko and I'm head of the contracts portfolio committee. Atoms selling. Contracts Portfolio Committee. The random words committee. I'm a head of business incorporated. Corporation LLC. He's as. The head people I got a very prestigious email today from the president of Wall Street. From the head of contract portfolio committee. At a top go, sit at a top government ministry in South Africa. I would like to share this confidential deal in opportunity with you and the hope that. With the hope that we can both work together. For. Its success and mutual benefit a government ministry. Work. Let me, see little small. Simple this up close because I'm. Slow small for me the. Plus I'm blind. I should've had lasted eighteen years ago. See here. He says. A government ministry where I work is currently profiling processing payments to all their foreign contractors in the current year I wanted to take advantage of this rare opportunity to your profile to our ministries payroll portfolio. Damn I'm special. You are out of all the people that they could have on. Your all your hard work is finally paid off. You've been recognized from the head of contracts portfolio committee. That's a special place those big words. I WanNa take advantage of this. To protest ministries payroll portfolio for profiling in addition as one of their foreign contractors, so you can stand as the beneficiary to receive contract payment to the value of fifty million dollars mark. Well. A number that marge has to be legit. She can kiss double toasted goodbye I mean if they'd said a few thousand. Fifty million that the fifty million me back in the day it used to be just a million or two, but they. You know adjusted for inflation, and although it also with them seeing how valuable is because I'm sure they've seen how you've said you've run this great corporation of double toasted so well. We believe in your business, Mr Coleman. And fifty million special number. That's a big number because that's the number of everybody uses when they exaggerating how much something is. Two million dollars. Fifty million people up in. One half a million people ask me for one. Fuck. That's the bit they'd like eight-year-olds. Aspects you fifty million dollars. You can't joke bike. fucking? Well, I know who does. The contract. Hitting right here. That's fifty million dollars US show. I have the Authority as the head of contracts portfolio committed committee in the ministry to Lodging your profile for addition as one of our contractors and beneficiary of payment. Regularize in prove vital paper works. Will be accepted and approved by the ministry. Appointed Payroll Bank this will officially place you as a contract payment beneficial goddamn long. Let me tell you they beneficiary. Losing Cheer People with so many works. Third that was gone for once I got to the third beneficiaries like hey, wait a minute. Fishy here. A. Ministry will then approve payment of fifty million dollars us to your foreign contractor through allocation of funds to any of the appointed paying banks. Banks those well. I gave them all of. Slow you, know if one doesn't work, they can go. I got about three banks. That's why keep man because of opportunities like this. You never know how good good good! Routing numbers all day, but I mean I was very concise. Very detailed was the payment I'm sorry once the contract payment is approved on your name, and the transfer is completed to your account. We will then arrange to meet in share the funds and the ratio fifty percent for me. Oh, well, fuck that only get twenty five million. Fuck you. We're talking about a scam. Snow You promised. ME, fifty. Old I'm I'm? GonNa play hardball. Yeah Yeah if you can get another third, you know I'm the one doing all the work right here. I'm the one taking the risk I at least have to get seventy five twenty five, at least at least. See here. If. You were capable of handling this deal with me. Please Samir confirmation our feedback. To my private email address Charles Biko sixty five at g mail, and then I will provide you with more working details. You be capable of cooperating and actualize this deal with me. Contact me as a matter of urgency, yours faithfully Charles J Biko. They head of contracts portfolio committee. Boy You know bigly you if you own jump on that I'm getting. I'm I'm getting paid. I'll tell you well. Let's swap you give me the Brian Rosillo. Give Me Ryan Brown runners I'll give you Charles. J Biko. Biko that's amateur hour. Ration-! Honeypot you the million dollars and then trying to nag you and say like if you're. Yeah, I mean you know this might not be. You might not be up to snuff. I have to determine whether you're good enough for this deal. Yeah, you gotta live up to my standards. Yeah, yeah, I think I can't. I mean he didn't choose reasonable boy. He saw something in me. Mr Biko. He comes from a great lineage by the way of course stems from the second cousin on his. Divorced, mother side. Stephen Biko. Yeah Man. Said about traded you this for. Rental even it was deadpool. That'd be better. Yeah. I I got to say I haven't seen one like that, not in a long time I was. I was simultaneously offended in honors I'm like well. You know what I mean. You've gone this stupid to fall for this, but not too many people getting these these days now I mean I. Get something on my phone twice a day with. Hey, here's A. Drink this and it'll melt belly fat. Or your everyone's investment in these make sure you can get on early enough. It's like how many times I've got block. How many of these numbers that you have block them every day and it's up to every other day. No, not every other day is twice a day every day. Yeah, well. Of course, that's stupid. Minnows of false promises on melby belly, Fat Lake Dead, and you know nobody have. Stock Market is very risky investments very risky. It's not like this I just have to do a swab your. Bank account and they. Don As man I'm stupid. But as easy money. This Is, ridiculous me, I'm out anytime. You see fit. Does you go well maybe? This is so far as like. You want to start with a reasonable amount. Enough to make a person go, Ha, yeah, that could be something to this like ten thousand is on. Yeah, getting a five thousand. Man Yeah I don't know if this is real, but put five thousand really would help me out a lot. Chad is criticizing me, and they said cord turn down fifty million know stupid stupid. Yeah, people that will toast failed. It's all because you didn't take. It didn't take golden opportunity when his hand handed to you, yeah! Just done there. You go the hardboiled one. He said Cord is lost fifty million dollars man. Why haven't responded yet I? Just got this today so now, but he said confidential. And you. Put it up there so now, everybody. Everybody trying to get my fifty million dollars nearby town. You get that he's like. Brought I only got a million lefty. Hope I'll get banned because I'm stupid person like actually emails. Hello, Mr Biko. I am an associated Coleman. Understand, that he turned down this generous off of you. I would like to follow through. Below is my bacon kind of a mixed. And Social Security number. My Home Address. Credit Card Info. Yeah Man. Don't don't don't do this some somebody. Because you never know, you'll tell me. Never, go on for that money. Be Poor if you want to. Suck up you want to pay. When I got to lose. Everything. Do mean everything. Because these these people I tell you thing about these people they they. They are smart. You'd think as dumb, but somebody somewhere falling for this. Yeah, it's a numbers game. Yeah, yeah, sure you're going to get a lot of people who blow it off. Who say no, but there's always somebody yeah. Patches can't believe I'm getting all of these men. What was the what was the last one there was the last one? Oh, yeah, the last one was A. Your social security number has expired. You could be you could be. You could be fine. Thousand Dollars. It was a wasn't a person prerecording. Your social security number has expired. You are in danger of breaking the law called this number immediately which your social security number as it is ready to recite a sumptuous. Got Got me good Oh. Yes, talk about that. And is ready. Run out to the. Movies about I'll go to stop in the house where you go. To the snow. Brought to ruin everything as a good thing you were there. When you? Were Safe we save. I gave him all of our information. Go to kill. I'm going to kill you. Has Done. Oh. Yeah, people be careful with this man. I love the Robo calls 'cause. They're voice activated. You just answer and don't say anything. They just sit there. The the dead air. You say hello hello. Did you know that your warranties are about to expire on that one. Man I did something on. Before, we start a streamline regularly here. I did something where I did. I forgot what it was, but some women at call me and I did the call back. There was a scam scam. They were just trying to sell some useless. And I called back and I did a big long as con commercial for DT Merch. Was Mad at the. And I did it. I did it online, so people saw that. Recorded, but if you were with us when we were streaming before we even start streaming here, officially y'all end the call with me when I did that so y'all probably remember that man and woman with may unless you're gonNA, call and try to ruin my day by selling me some shit. It's going to get married. I try to say these quality shirts from teamwork dot com. Remember that Bourgeois Blues. Man. Shit was funny. Are you dom, stupid or dumb There you go. I was going to be me, but turn divided. Turn that. Down because I could have been that duck right there. You could have been at eight now. Given given him just sitting cheesy. They're looking like that except when. Barrel? I really felt I. Believe? I'm stupid. Mr. Biko is blue man. I'm cory. You, yeah folks be careful out there. Then, June? Prince, Louis! KEEP HIS ASS out. Everybody's welcome to the honeycomb on out except the Nigerian prince. Has Fifty million dollars in his hand right. They're. Still counterfeits. WH WHY is your face on all these? What kinda dollars. Of, course of course of course CR told. A, thank you. Lose it in do in Douma. Mon Mon Duma Monday I know you've been awhile? I'm sorry can ever get your Duma fifty seven. Thank you for the subscriptions and let's see here. Say Snake. How you doing yet while Ryan, you will quick man you quick. He found the clip from twitch may play in the show, but is there. People want to see the link Ford but yeah man. Yeah I was Was Actually Fun Tommy to more than just mess. What people? WanNa call people all day, but don't like when people reverse shit on them. As like you know you're you're you're Biko benefactor as people who they? That's their job. Is Scamming scammers Oh yeah? The Guy Farms when they change those numbers quickly. Sometimes, they changed right after the phone with him. Yeah, they got many. It's amazing. Oh is that. This is. Ginger Lemon thyme ginger. Limit Time how you doing now. Is that real money? Those real bits right there. Thank you for the one thousand biddies over here. Thank you Ginger Lemon thyme. Basil Generous. I gotta ask you something. Real quick. First of all how you doing I mean ask you that glad you guys are here and this is not a scam at all, but this is. More of like a legit big. Please please I humbly big you to support the channel you're. Like this person right here. John John's the John John's thank you. The John John's came in and supported. Would they subscribe seven months? On a four-month streak right now, but they. They've subscribe seven months. Be like these. Generous towards over here. Support in thing is really doesn't cost you anything. If you have an Amazon prime account. If you do get yourself Amazon I'm sorry you already have you get yourself a twitch prime subscription, but absolutely free. Don't pay anything nothing at all. You don't spend more emails, right? There's no catch. Fifty million. Yeah The only catch is that you sit back and be able to enjoy everything that we bring to you for absolutely nothing on your part now. On at home hat out. Of. Knobby Leon I'm sorry. Get this all all these wrong. Nobby Nabi Eon you subscribe to other day. Thank you so much for subscribing again a comb hat and gifted subs out there. Aren't you be like navy? Eon in gifts themselves to some people out there who do not have the toasted goodness all over their bodies, not as fortunate as you are, and if you get yourself a sub are. You get to someone else's so you gifted ace up from someone else then pleased when the time comes around, renew that subscription, and if you're getting tired of and I know I noticed look, just oppressive Abun, but the today they don't even like. Ages want everything done for then. We'll send somebody over to your house to pick up your hand and I. Know. As to weird, okay well, here's what you can do without the weirdness. Get yourself a tier one to two or two three subscription. We're going to be a new very soon and there'll be other perks like. That and do anything but sit. Joe Lays back and enjoy. and. Grover looking can tell groves looking thoughtful. A sexy I can't really tell right now looking. Grove of got those gig gird lasts. Like that? Oh, let me see. In folks join a double toasted discord, we'd take this off, so you can see. Let me see here. Tiny URL dot. com forward slash the DT discord. Join US over there as we try to get this community on dischord going and we try to make it more a part. Of all the wonderful shows we have over here. And let's see. Well more announcements. This involves us a need you for this one. Needle. UPS to Bernard really need you right here now. because we're going to go commercial break. That's okay with you. Yeah, it's fine. I got his permission and we'll do it, but here's the thing. During the commercial break. We just don't want to sit appear. And just stare at. You shouldn't WanNA. Stare at each other I. See him all. Slow do us a favor. Let's go ahead and mix it up a little bit. Give us something to do given us an email to read from you and. I'M GONNA. Go ahead and put up the address, but if you can do your part and pull out that keyboard and typing for US K coon man's. G Mail. Dot Com. Moto Baggins. Baggins, thank you I guess he's the Jewish cousin of Proto. Shmatko bags over there. Thank you, thank you for the subs listen. Emails Kate Cooman Gino Dot com email any kind of questions, common compliments, insult, input and our vice. Hit US up on the social media twitter instagram facebook. Type in W. toasted. Take you what you need to go are hit me up on facebook and got something to say to me. Don't want everybody else to hear. TYPING COREY DOT COM dot five up to. Take about your input. Me On twitter and Instagram Martin on his. Look the Mine Thomas Facebook. Would say. The for myself over here in the world famous, they'll kill studios, but We described the place book row and we got. We got the bill to test. Win into swab the rule man we. Tested negative. We keep it like that slow. As much as we enjoy having you folks around. Back the fuck up. His! Back! I'll feel threatened. But. You. Can lose your job. But you know what come on down here at the time to save preferably when they find, beg seen. That way. We can safely accommodate. Let's see the pauses right here. On this up here. Dow is up here in folks. WE'RE GONNA. Take that commercial break that we've been talking about, but before we do that. I WANNA. Thank somebody very special. I think generous beg came in. Came in with subs while we were doing our thing, so you know what Oh you WanNa these. Comb Hatikva the school. Comb had of big as buller. Do Hanukkah. Is that enough for you all right all right. Thank you sir. So, let's see we're going to go ahead and get to that commercial. Break Right now. And we will be right back. see what more Info for you and a few other things right after. Swing Chris Harman comes. Love what. He does he does this thing? We was like right after. These kick because you think he's making a kitty cat fickling. Don't miss him. Don't ask okay. It's all right I. mean is me making him do all this. Is the most normal Ghana world until he gets around you. The whole way Atari when he's on his street. Out. But time is like. Yes, thank you. Thank you. That's very nice. Thank you, thank you. Drink my whiskey at the house. Yes, I would just say yes. I'll. Trying to try to. Pretend like he wasn't thinking about it the whole time like. Thirsty is. Often. To evolve over here Jesus. Christ Zach. Do the little dance. Thirsty do I. Want some more. We see my Glasmann empty for the last thirty Goddamn. Looking at yes, sure I, I suppose I wouldn't mind so. Cheap mother fucking Shit, trying to pull dramatic pause and like you know he's not in the last. Oh. Is this empty? Oh. I guess I would I suppose. You could put. By Joe I think would that is an option. Maui. Yeah by Whiskey for his all the time and the fucking bottles for you just take it. Yeah, just just put his name on it. I've asked him. So! He can just get it whenever you want Juicy Herman. Whiskey! Here. What is this? What is this? Guy a little rock where I don't WanNa. Get into this shit. Tonight I about this. I I'm take a brief. Break in Little Rock black owned business. Chicken Wings, says he no longer serves black people. You know. I'm sure he has a good reason. I don't want to get into right now. Just having a good time. Later I'm curious, but I'll get into later. let's see here. I haven't see. Might over, there should be read his phone, but again trouble bring y'all's emails up. Let me see. They told you about NATO. You got on my ass about that. They know. That I know that they know that I know. I shouldn't be doing this. Inc.. Hello, Cory Martin I. Love The show and I just want to know what your thoughts are on inception. A love it a lot, but I would love to know what you think of it and how you would rate it. Keep up the good work. You guys great and always make my day inception, and he's probably ask him because ten years now. Okay especially ten years ago. And, you know what I just. Don't make a big. Production out of this I'll just say I have a lot more appreciation for inception as a use of gone on when I saw it at first I, it's not done in like it I liked it I just. I guess maybe I could have been reacting to just love and Christopher Nolan at the time I. Don't know, but. Side! Again years ago, not. About three or four years ago and I was like you know this is not so bad I. Would I complain about? It's actually pretty smart. Just maybe I'll just too done to get it the first time, I don't know, but I you don't like it at all, I? Would say I didn't like it at all, but I'm not really a fan of the movie. I. Just the things that bothered me about it when I saw it still bother me now. Even when I re watched it recently and I was like again. It's still buds me. The the whole premise is really far fetched It the economics of it. What these people are willing to put on on the line like death. Just to implant an. Idea in somebody's head they may or may not act on and movie is way too full exposition like there's just so many scenes where just somebody just these are. The rules Blah Blah Blah Blah and a lot of times. They break those rules anyway, and it's too long when they buy into that. The Big Snow Snow Snow machine fight. Guys come. Did we really have to go this? This right now. Watch it again. Took me about five more times. Okay Louis C.. Good question for Marcus, Kilgore. Good evening. Dry Korey Coleman smooth Martin Thomas. What changes if any do you see productions, a film and TV making a how cops and other law enforcement officials are portrayed looking for unique toasty analyst in Latte about culture, examining the role of cops. And I live the murder of George. Floyd thank you all and the toasties for being a source of hope, insight and humor in crazy times, as life has seen, is ups and downs for me. Up The thing with the girl is still going okay that arcus Kilgore out now. They did not whoops, well shit. I guess I should ask for us in yeah. He always keeps a sunny disposition well. Hey, man is always another. Plenty more fish in basically I like you being successful. We've got a great attitude. Yeah, Swab Guy like yourself. You'll be sorry. I'm jealous. You Got Opportunity. I think I'm jealous you got out. But that's. Kidding of course you are. You work over the past months has been exceptional, and I'm always for the great work that you do have a wonderful day in st toasting. Think that people like looking at these renegade. Bad as hard edged cops, starting to examine and like okay. That ain't too cool, no more, I. I I'm glad the world is finally catching up to the Shit I've been talking about twenty twenty five years and I know I. Keep saying that, but it's just like when it's happening. You like yeah motherfucker. Cops have had the best pr machine in the world because they they're always portrayed as the heroes and kids grow up wanting to be cops, and now when it's like, Oh, wait, cops have been betraying us. Oh, yeah, now you shock. It rocks your world that. But as always been. I think has always been a encouraged. Yes, the police go outside because the bad guys were always black and white. The bad guys will always bad and he's cops. You know man these good cops. They ain't doing shit. I gotta go outside to rule. It takes it takes an outlaw who's who's not going to be handcuffed by the rules and worried about rights gets the job done. Yeah, there was even like a marble had to put out. An issue of the or lease highlight an issue of the punisher because all these cops were. Are you on. I'm not going to get political tonight, but I just gotTa say this I set to see other down show. With militarization of cops has been has reached a dangerous point where they even have these conventions that they go to initiate shirts, just glorified this this almost vigilante-type violence and In! Wearing symbols like the punish a skull those A. It was a punt comic, we said. You know. I hope you ain't me, 'cause I'm fucking crazy, yeah! He's like you know you get I'm a guy that's been pushed to the edge and really I'm I'm not I'm not right. You'd like you. Guys are supposed to be withholding the LA I'm working outside the law. Yeah, I mean the superheroes don't like him. No. They don't and he's something. You think there's some point. They have the mom. He popped up tastes, spider man spider like this fucking nuts rockwood. Despite his could even go up. Exposure was so crazy. Yeah Man. Yes. It's this whole thing about like. They're talking about making the. LETHAL WEAPON AGAIN With, what's yeah in talking about making another one with Danny Glover and Mel? Gibson and I'd like both way too old for this shit, and this is way too crazy racist and Why would you punish the brand I mean I? Know? It's already tarnished that he's in them. They tarnished already understand that, but there's still some people who can hold on Lake will. That's before I knew that's maybe he wasn't drinking back then. Maybe he hadn't gone crazy. Point I still like this, but the trot him out now and do that that that that would kill off. The last vestige of any kind of good feelings was that I was still love lethal weapon still I still love lethal weapon. Man As we speak. Look I'm not. Like, I said my dislike, certain people has made me just want to go retroactively. Look at the legacy stuff. They'd done some things i. don't like and some things. I don't like you always talk about Roman. Polanski like all. I'm thinking about it because I haven't seen it I've never seen it and I'm thinking about watching Rosemary's baby. I'M NOT GONNA. Support New Shit. He's done under the under the title of a rapist but right. His pass works and everything. I'm just like I'm not that much of a stickler where I don't watch this. I will go back and watch people's pass stuff of. What? I'm not saying that this is the problem we'd like again. Kathleen not, but it was problematic. He was crazy in the first Balkan fill. Yeah, you know he was. He was working at the. We're supposed to like be sympathetic well. He lost his wife so music still. Well, my wife! She's a law and order junkie always watching the reruns and going like I haven't seen this one before I'm like. Stop Line you seen. them all. To hit. But especially. The SVU special victims unit the ones with Christopher. Maloney, as a cop. I would start watching whether I get up and discuss I was like all he's doing e. he abuses everybody's rights. and. And they just kind of like. Go Man. You shouldn't do that and is never repercussions for it. Dirty. Harry is the worst one. Dirty hair is the worst one. I'll tell you all these all these images that we've grown up. They all kind of been alive. everybody looks to John Wayne like Oh. What a real American John! Wayne was a straight up. Bitch a coward John Wayne was a fucking coward. John was a racist as fucking coward. He found every reason to not going anti war when Jimmy Stewart was signing up for world, War Two and all and some other people Jimmy Stewart sign up. To that do. Unless they injected with superstar. Don't you go to this? You? Are Thank you, but he was willing to go, but Jim John Wayne go, but everybody saw John Wayne movies right as a cowboy and a soldier into animation sold is read out his friends. During. The McCarthy era John. Wayne was A. John was a straight up bitch. John Wayne was a fucking. Lie All this shit about the the whether they call them the Duke and all that. S It was a fabrication. Yeah it's a myth. John Wayne might as well be right up there with Frodo, baggins and shit. You know mythical character. Frodo went on his quest. He stepped up. Shit! He was just that whole cooling. Ludo Time Muffins and Second Breakfast. Begging. fucking cable. Drag my book coming I got something for you to do. This cross street. Kill Drag. Learn how to beg. Dragging. Frontal did his. John Wayne was a bitch man. He like John. I bet you John Wayne had height on him and John Wayne Myth behind him I. Bet you. A lot of people stepped up and beat the shit out of him bag. Where everybody thought like Oh, you're gonNA mess with him. John Wayne wasn't shit. With a straight up man? And his family's always trying to fend well. He was old at the time. Not Not always that what they say he was feeble at. He was in his sixties. Feeble! He did a John Wayne this bitch he he bought into his own legend yeah. John Wayne. You could probably slept the shed. John John Wayne was a fucking coward and I would tell his family that. John Wayne One shit. John Wayne was was recreating shit when everybody was that when when people doing the real thing and the biggest thing about John, Wayne? John Wayne was a straight raises man Oh, yeah! Yep plane motherfucking man. I know. How? He did an interview. If I. got this right now I might. Might be remembered as wrong I. Think I. Read this because I could be wrong about this. But I believe he did an interview with playboy. Where we playboy, he them all this bullshit, this rugged cowboy John Wayne was was a fucking Shit John. Wayne was probably back in his younger days. He probably scrapped man. You know because he had hired on me and everything I sit up here and dismiss them. You know he was. He was a big dude, but really deep down inside. yellow-bellied man he He didn't interview would playboy I believe we straight up said I believe in white supremacy, and as far as. That needs to be in place. For, for because black people don't have the ability to lead take Lee positions in positions of power. You know it was something then. If I'm wrong, then you know what I apologize to all your engine waiting for the. You know the memory of John Wayne whatever but. I thought I read that somewhere. So if that's true, you can look it up and if I'm exaggerating and I'm you know it'd be said that, but I I I have quotes from him or stuff with interviews. I was like. Eight hundred that in reading is like Oh shit well. He just said it right there. Yeah, let me see. Oh I got computer looking. Down and get to a computer playboy interview. While I saw. This may have is completely wrong. And I do all the time. I see some shit, I ever John Wayne. White! Premium! Here, Los Angeles CBS local. That's. It was a different time. John Wayne son response to calls to rename OC airport over playboy interview. Let's see here. The. OSCE Democracy Wayne spoke publicly about these views in one, thousand, nine, hundred and one interview in Playboy magazine, in which he was quoted as saying I believe in white supremacy until the blacks are educated to appoint responsibility. I don't believe in giving authority in positions of leadership in judgment to irresponsible people's fucking. I was right. If you're? GonNa. Be legit. 'cause I was like Oh plus I was scared like Shit I just ran my mouth. I don't know what I'm talking about. I. Remember seeing this years ago. Man I was like. Why aren't people talking about this? But yeah fuck man. Do. But they, but it's like I said right now. Article Right there, they. They. Come out and they're like well, you know. Is the it was the. Time the words of feeble old man, he was sixty seven years old. You WanNa, fucking. You still swag around like you will got named Duke like you actually Ouden. About the. In his plate. And Forget gingas Kahn. Their red paint. Hoya. GINGAS Kahn Yeah. Full right here, man. Yeah, he's. He said he was a bitch straight a bitch. All the all the about him of the Lai. He flipped on his friends and a minute to save his career when other people at the fighting for people's careers man. And Couch it in just being a good American. Me Ask you. This is I'm not I'm not starting. Thinking about I'm not mad, but what does that mean? Cory out here nitpicking. Nitpicking on which white people clown? PICKETT! was A me. Yeah, what? What? What? What the fuck do this time? They say stuff just to try to get a rise. Outta I'm not I'm not no I'm not I'm not going to what you're talking about. Explain yourself just like what the fuck is that me? We were just we stumbled to a conversation. and John Wages has a part of that conversation. It wasn't it wasn't like I. was at I was I was at the Baskin Robbins of racist white people are like What flavor one? Oh. What Racist White Person. Do I want now. Well we we, we would talk about police. You look though went. Hey, John, Wayne across. Are just came out of nowhere. came out of nowhere. Cops Races Mayor John Wayne. Be. Kinda. I was like wait. How do we? So I got joey like John Wayne. Get over here. To tell you something about yourself I. Got John Wayne Around here somewhere? Maybe he's right. Talk. Imagine John Wayne Year. Beginning existing? John Wayne and he's been dead. Night trying to hide. Somebody, chest was of mice Craig. Right. lethal weapon four. That's so crazy I wanna see it. Yeah. Yeah I way. I kinda do to see what they're trying to do. I WANNA. See them trying to be like A. Belay. Liam Neeson taken fifty to jump a fence. Trellis. Two hours Ole jokes. I don't need that. In Year. Or Maybe Maybe this'll be the one we'll get terms as you would never even liked. You'll black and has. Been, wanting to say this. Now that I'm on my MS MCINTYRE I hate you. The fuck out my car. Okay Okay The redemption of rigs maybe goes into a program. Almost like they pull some. It's all about him doing doing the apology tour. is almost like A. Wasn't. Is Riggs and Murtaugh Marta! Riggs was Danny Glover. No Raises Mel Gibson. Be Funny if If it was. You know what should I. Didn't I only Riggs? Murtaugh? It's. is in real life Mel Gibson I think he's Stockholm Emma. Danny Glover. He was an interview in this woman. As so, what do you feel about? Mel Gibson's comments as of late and. Danny gloves like. Look. I'm wondering. Are you trying to get bad mouth somebody I ain't going. Do what I'm going to tell anybody and was like I'm not. I'm not trying to get you Batman. Just it's. It's legit. I mean he may come inside. You worked with them. Idea the black body. Fill Nah now. I'm because you know what everybody wanted. How motel you like everybody else I'm not bad mouth Mel. Gibson I! Want you to know. I Love Mel Gibson. And as almost. The woman is Jesus. Did He fuck you? I mean he has inspired some serious loyalty. 'CAUSE 'cause you, you know. Jodie foster and Robert Downey Junior. They will say anything against anyone. They won't entertain it. It's almost as if if you take out. The alcoholism. And the racism Misogyny, he's the sweetest guy in the world. Should. Look. You said he killed my wife. Op Faucet. Do. Still breathing. Make Me Watch. He's really crazy. Help me. You Blink away saying I love milk gifts. Okay I'm not going bad about them at all. All right when you blinking late they. Need help so! What if? You Him and never knew he didn't any of that. And you had cancer. He paid for the best doctors and it got you well. When you add death door, man, and then he comes out and does. Fuck the head I mean. Look I'm not going. He did shit saying solid. Lightly but I mean look angle they. Look like a Goddamn fool. Pack of you! Know what? I'm going to be like I. At least I want to be I'm going to say you know what that guy he did. Some the kindest things me which makes a disappointing to hear him do it. I mean that was him, but you know what I'll pray for Emma hope it gets better than. A hope the re, the real meal that I know comes out, but that. Yeah, that was on call for you know I'll say something like that you. Look like I'm his bitch. A lows bill keeps. Like he just cut me Mike? Like like you fucked me till I love. And be doing this. To. Anybody. He gave me some sweet dignity. I'm look I'm just saying I'm not. GonNa to. Say something to that effect our at least acknowledge it. You have to who you know I mean. There's people that I know. People would just to take them. face value. I didn't know where I know them. And it came and said something I would have to be like. Yeah, I I know I looked that person's nice to meow no. But I get it I get you know I I've done that with several people several people. You know I've done no crazy people. You know. I know how you fucking hanging with that gun man. I love it. But, I know how crazy they can get. Get, said the Yuba once a week. I was a witness most. What expect you to be the men I love core Coleman and just leave it at that. But that month it's crazy. He was asked. No, he was shitty person. Yeah, no, but. If you knew the person on news. Yeah, but there you go all right all right, so hey, before we get into this review, let's talk about. A little something, right? He'll talking about these bad move reviews. That you guys have generously supported in the past. We got more coming up right here. Folks, you know how it goes. We start to do bad movie reviews on the regular. Classic Movies sometimes, but you guys really love the bad move reviews. And we have a batch of new ones, ray here new four bad movies to vote on. Now let me check over here. Thank you. Guys did reach. Let me, look and see. You know what I'm not even bullshitting. I'm not even bushing. We need one more sub one more sub to get this poll going right here. I'm not. I'm not live right, Biko because. I need. You know. You deposit me. I will give you fifteen times. Does once we got it, but there. It is right there man the four choices that you have. We were taking fifty subscriptions to get this band movie. Pull going in all look at that. Jay is seven hundred just took it over. y'All. Give a big round of applause to Jay. Conquer Hanako. Himself a sub alert. Hanako had hit him one more time. Yeah folks. Let me see here. See Let me, see folks. We have over here. They just my man just took us over so and a few other people did too so now we can safely put up this poll where you can vote for Godzilla Nineteen, Ninety, eight, ninety nine last night, but I was quickly corrected by billy. Jaws the revenge spun and the Wild Wild West Star Will Smith right there the poll. Go up imagine this evening. You'll see it up on our instagram. You'll see it up on our facebook. And you guys you vote on which one you want and I think by next Tuesday unless something comes up unless something newsworthy eclipses this right here. Then we will be doing the bad move. You but I want to thank everybody when think everybody will be here. Excuse me. Want to thank everybody who? Has Come in and helped us. With our. Subscription, rate the you know what I'm GonNa do. I'm actually giving you guys. Mcginn you guys. A sub alerts them to see if I can actually give. You got some applause right here. So thumbs up. You're doing everything Manley Manley. Manley. Let me. See do I have. I thought I had. Got Cheers for you guys. I forgot I had. This whole thing will be here of Of of sound effects can find on one, but I'll give you this muggy with the kids really. You made the happy has died off. You! See there you go. About this I'll give you this. Spokesman. Insist! Boy bombed on that joking. That's like having your mom and Dad. It's funny. I would you be. kind of like those kids little man that went to good boy. Oh, we just had another subscriber right there. Thank you. Walk. About Holland Oh! Do for the children. Marley no! Kids what you can do. They go. Be Happy all right. Let's go and get into. The Damn Yori. That a BURP. Sodas today are though the sparkling water one right now. That's what do to. That's why I drink this stuff too much man. To. Go ahead and get. Get my review voice going. Get that activated gaming. I think I finally just placebo muscle man thinking that it works I'm over work. But. which is gonNA pretend to does all right. I can give you this clear review right here. All right. Let's go ahead and get into us when we got Now. Being I'm being serious. 'cause I know it's an obvious joke and I'm not I mean might be stupid. You might laugh at it. It'd be leading in my dumb ass, but I I really did think that when I heard about this movie Greyhound I really did think it was about Tom Hanks being a bus about. He's been a ship captain. Pilot Yeah? Only because I only glanced at this picture because it was coming up on the Internet on like. Certain websites banners and and I heard Greyhound. I of course is about him. Driving a Greyhound bus about the captain's hat was a greyhound bus drivers. Within, I thought he was looking at a crack. Takes job seriously yeah yeah man. You know because. I was still thinking of of things like a a sully. Twenty diving for. More than enough to west drink, chemist homer beheading troubles at home. This is the captain. Brace for. You know this is what we landed a plane. Some turbulent weather's I'm so. I thought Shit I. I just assumed it was it is. He's trying to grading that he's trying to. He's trying to get the bus back to the garage for the engine explosives. Me Next movie. He'll be an ice cream. Man You. GotTa get desires cream back. To. It gets hurry. I did I didn't know. I was like. I guess he's saving saving passages before they get to Arizona. I didn't know man but I you know I guess. This is kind of the same. No You got a Greyhound bus. You got a battleship here. It's not too much different. The same Greyhound bus, you got a Greyhound battleship right here. Is that drive the bus get over. But I wanted them in. My set on. A little disappointed. It got to be honest with you know he's got this big as majestic shipment under the CAN. I get a ride. About this. But man, you know. His name in this movie is. Captain Ernst Krause. He's given his first command aboard ship called the Greyhound. I guess that's the SS Greyhound on but. I mean they must really believe in is do because. I believe on his his his first command. Manav is his first day, but this his first command. You're not only getting on this ship to like. Take charge of all these young soldiers and these kids, but you lean the whole convoy. Across the Atlantic and he wasn't like what. Not because he had a chick, he's trying to impress. Thanks everything. He's trying to get lazy like Elizabeth. He's trying to get her to marry him and get her. Follow him everywhere and she's like you know. Do, you should. Let's see where you're at about six months. AW COMMITTED! To say. Movie like he's like you know I got the Big Bang going on. They make me captain of not just the ship, but all convoy Iraq Asia and she's like you know what that's cool, but let's let's wait and see if you're gonNA. FUCK IT UP I. died first. So he's leading this convoy across the Atlantic now. Only thing has the only catch you. They got you know he's leading. The number Greyhound is leading all these ships out there. As a wolf. Wants to eat this germ wolf. You boat out there. That's what I call him the wolf. and. They ain't gonNA stop they. Like these Germans, they won't start some shit. He's we go into. You know there's GonNa follow you around everywhere you go and just keep badgering yours and to you witnessed us right now. We are not going to be satisfied. Until we start the biggest battle own, see Mona World War Two. And Captain Krause Tom. Hanks, he's like God damn, can I get settled in I? Can I leave. Get on the seventy four y'all stop blasting and talking shit. Can I least get no, the crew and they're like Nope, not at all. Man You want to be the big center. Let's see what you got. Welcome to your first day on the job. Let's go ahead. And see if. Tom Hanks Aka Captain Ernst. Krause is up for the task. As we watch this trailer for Greyhound and I will be back. Unfortunately, Martin did not see this because of complications. We ran the screening, but this okay I'm here for you. Sir. I'll tell you everything you need to know and we will find out my opinion with my review right after this. Shit would help. On this doesn't make better. Like a silent movie World War Two. Over the Atlantic this dumb ass on his first day, it'll be easy. You Roll up on this you go. Lord. Let Your Holy Angel The No power over. Into your hands. I commend myself my body and soul. Congratulations on your command. Was Be looking for you. Even if I'm a thousand miles away. Aris Hound. You. Uber Cover for the next five days. Travel Sanguine. How many crossings does this make? It's my first. Say Shit. Wait. What did he say? Wait what? You might as well get captain, crunch. WHAT THE FUCK! Johny say that. Got Some most likely to you both. We kill. Distressed rockets sir. We can get directly from the convoy. Wolfback on. Ours, we've lost seven ships. Why are you did? Yesterday got us the day. Enough. Nearly enough. Disappeared Surf. WHAT ARE WE GONNA? Do we'll rain hell down from on high? Man Trailer together. Those those monster trumpets in there. Oh, it goes to whatever they should. The whole tiny fight wells in the background. Just sharing to sit on. In the background. Whole time and you know up fighting you guys. If feels like. They were telling an actual story with this when the movie started. You know with this. You Got A. You know you starts out with Tom Hanks, trying to get with Elizabeth Shue right here. You know He tells it. Hey, look like I said he like man. I got this I got this this position? He thought it was GONNA make is like turn her moist mainly. They made me cat damone boat right here. I'm getting. Station at all these great places like the. Caribbean Jamaica Iraqi razor there. You know he's trying to impress. Watch. Come with me. New Job Well. You might even want to. Marry me and I may be able to get done on the knee and proposed to you. And and she's in. She is us, you know. Let's just wait and see how the rest of the movie goes. To See if you're gonNA fuck this up. Real bad, you know. Jump, the gun right here, we still we still got another hour and twenty minutes to goal is. Let's say I had happened. And this is your first day, right? But. Once they on their boat. They got two guys that a fight. Tom Hanks bring them into the to the cabin. Straws laying in about to find out what's going on with these two right here. And there's somebody just busting. The room got to attack and he played well. Fuck this. Let's figure it out. I. Guess this shit gotTa wait. And whatever store they had going on, but you don't find out anything about him and Elizabeth Shue. All for the rest of the movie that she didn't even addressed again. With two knuckleheads of fighting about fuck that we find out is not important. We in a tag. You boats out here. That is. that. Would you surp- everything else I've just what I'm saying is like a movie year. They'll fight and it'll come back. You know he'll call and Bishou or the two guys that were fighting. All of the. The wars going on guys under attack. These two guys who are fighting a one time. They'll realize that they were better together. They one of them say the other. Cliche, but you don't get, but don't even know who they are anymore how they've gone. You know. We never go back to the rest of these things right here. What you get is pretty much a straight up warfield from that point on. And people are saying well. That's cool. I mean that's what I'm here to see. I'm here to see Warfield trailer advertised me, you know. Let's get straight to the fighting to the action. I'm fine with that, and they do get to that, but beforehand they got gotta. Make a few commands in a pressing buttons. Pull some levers. Release a messages. You know of course charts some graphs. Drought some. Drought some lines on a board so people what they need to do. The To point you'd like Damn. Movies. We just start getting right into it, you know prepping for a battle is very long and detailed. Hell. You don't want to die. Yeah, but I'm just saying you know not listened to combat the movie. Legally the real people. You know expire by true of. All Right? This is just like you know. I'm looking at this and this is like. Wow, man, it takes. You know so. We kind of just prepping in real time. You're not going to join the navy. This stuff right here. Man Is A. You know it was kind of like being at a kind of like being at a restaurant in the kitchen. Just watch people prepare your. Why you waiting on is like all right, you know. Cool. I guess, maybe the payoff will great when we get to the battle, but even when the fighting starts in this, even finding starts, it takes a while before you feel like you were actually part of the action, because this dicken pretty much to the point of view of the crew and the people on the ship right here. The Greyhound. Will torpedo an enemy. That we don't see. And you hear boom. Some be some cheers. you'll see oil slick on the water and you're like well. Should I guess we gotta? But. You don't really see you. Don't get the glorious special effects of. The, the ship blown up underwater, and all the bodies, floating and people on fire, and all kinds of yeah. Yeah, you don't. You don't really see all that again. Because taken place from the point of view of the people in the ship while you work all these people working together You know you see. You. Do see other ships. Getting attacked. But usually see those ships getting attacked off in the distance because again. You're on the ship. Looking at what's going on out there. Okay, so it is trying to get. It's giving you that experience. Yeah, yeah, it's not you know a fully submerged experience, because not everything is in real time a lot of preparation before they go into like actually. Fighting each other, but It's not this. Is Not one cut like nine hundred seventeen. Anything like that is. Edited time passes. Hours passed. So. You're not fully emerged, but at the same time you. Re Fat. Anybody's going in looking for just like a straight up. A warm movie for the fighting is loud and continuous, and we're seeing all the graphic. Wars Hill type imagery. You're not getting it right here. is to. Cool still looks impressive from. Is just that. You know like I, said. That's what the movie's really doing. You know what's really impressive is what they're doing because it looks good, but mainly because of the water that they have going on like the the spectacle of pretty much the ocean baseness while the ships on there. And when they start fighting. is almost like the water just instigating shit. Yeah! Wanted just trying to. Trying to start shit with people and talk to you like. To Square off with each other when I'm just pushes one. Wants one. The pushes one ship to another one. Yeah, you motherfucker fight. You know this this is. The the. The I. This is this a siege, but Also. You know some of this I. Guess could count as again the cinematic scope of these fights. That's impressive. Looking at the best the ocean how violent it gets interpreted against these people are fighting. That is cool. So, I can see why Tom Hanks was kind of disappointing Tom. Hanks Z. came, and he's like you know I. I. I wish this could have been on the big screen, but fuck. I'm just in Dhaka road. Yeah, you know, so. I I can see why. It's a good looking film, even though you might not be getting the being thrown into action like you want to. Slow looking forward saving private Ryan on the water. Then that's not what you get in here. What it sounds like this be a good move for people who are the actual military history. Buffs would watch the kind of action movie that most people get excited about and go. That's not how that would happen. Yeah, I mean well. I'll tell you what really. What they're trying to do here because. It takes about they do eventually get into. Close range battles with each other. Do Start to get in the middle of the fight after a while, it takes about forty minutes to get there. I was able to stop and look and see if there's a moment where. He's huge. Has Bullets Stop Pelton? The Greyhound. It's like okay now. This is probably what people looking for. And then starts to feel more like a traditional warfield. And you know and that's that's when. You know even at that point. Is Pretty Tame. At you know you start to feel like you're right into it. You start to actually get all the. Surrounding sound with everything and whatnot, but even that is pretty brief after moment because that's not what they're trying to do, I'll tell you the the the reasons why I think that the battles in here. Are Relatively. Taint compared to the recent war movies that we've seen because you know war movies now they try to show you. All the gory details goes yeah. Yes Saving Private Ryan opened a a whole new door. Oh yeah, no none of that. You know that that glorious ruled John Wayne. Down the beach, bullets flying by you do that Shit. You GonNa lose a job on an arm and a leg. And that's what happens here. Man. Is that they they? They tried to like. Get into that. What I really going into a man. It's a PG thirteen movie. Okay, it's the PG thirteen films, so you know. The blood and Gore is not not not the point. They got they got one moment in here. Where the the the worst that we see the worst violence we see? Stadium somebody getting hit a bullet. Hit some glass in the glass at the person in the face oh seriously. Oh, and they and I'll tell you the even like. Glasses them another soldier comes up and it's like a man, also other them. Blood. We trying to do is get US already. You don't have gone. Off. Yeah. So they they are careful not to show you Anaconda Gore is not that kind of movie. You get one one person saying fuck. That's it okay. You know they hit. At they, they don't show it. They hint at a horrible mutilation in this movie. You see some of the effects and most of the Hor- comes from John Tom Hanks right here Tom. Hanks is looking at then. He's like God. Damn. They fucked at personnel. And I was in saving private Ryan a lot of Shit. I'm looking at this. person completely up. You know. kind of describe what happened is person, but you don't you don't see. The reason why is because to? This is the movie about a guy who just got his command pretty much first day on the job. In. It's about his leadership. Those? Guy. That gets on there. And When he gets on. It's not even noon. Before somebody comes in and says yeah, as this shit about to go down. Can. I finish my lunch. No! Lunch he was barely finished with breakfast and I'm not even letting he had A. Black Dude just came out served him breakfast. Look like the cream of wheat, man just came out, and put a plate down in front of him, and served him breakfast, and did not, he did not get first of all. He looked irritated because he's of fighting. God Damn Y'all. Can you just let me settle in finish breakfast? And before he could even settle things with this with these guys. Then Shit starts to go down and it's the guy who he doesn't even. You don't even know these people's names Is. He's constantly fucking people's names up on this ship. Thank, you Larry Barry Sir. Yeah Man. He, he the crew. Yes not gain that confidence yet. And he's not very confident. Himself I mean you know he has enough to to worry about trying to deploy a lot of ships under his. Under his leadership here Much less have to gain the confidence of a crew. That is that normally. They would be able to get at least a you days to get to know him better. The in plus on top that. It really doesn't help that. The Germans just keep fucking with him. Yeah, I this, this funny looking at it as like okay, so the Germans they got. Wolves are hungry wolves, and and skulls and swastikas painted on their boats. To make them look extra evil, whereas the American boats are just they just nice yeah. What we're just the nice guy with those guys are mean. What? Ship was like a Greyhound bus. And they fuck with this, do and he? Is the. Betty Shit I'll be having a bad day. It's like crank calls. Gets, to, appoint serious, view like What? You've only was that. What do you want hello? Going to, fuck, you up. We're going to kill you. They really ought to. Some! It's almost like the joke is on. His Way. There is an actual line in there where some shit with down and people died in. Are they going into the next day? And? They can't come in against her. He's fucking. Once you get on with you. And God now. The Pins Shitty the Guy I'm not even acting like wolves. Halo? Did you think we will gone? No, we're still going to kill you. You will hear the screams. Of the children on that Serb. You. Know, you need to get these people man. Get the fuck up. And people look at him the whole time like Danny puck million. You'RE GONNA take. You say nothing back. Says he know what to say? We'll we'll we'll get you to. Do. Well WH-. Rough. Go. To? Chennai fruit and they do sound like. Did. You think you were gone. No, we still going to kill. You can be nice about it. God Damn Man. What you have here is. You have a a war film. You do have a war film that. Has Hollywood visuals, but not a Hollywood story. This thing here. It's more of a character. Piece is focused on one central character and is focused on his leadership. Because his focus so much on him. You don't even really get to know the rest of the crew that much I mean. Which is again depending on what you're looking for, it can be good or bad. Because the again you're voiding all those cliches that we talked about these. Because like. If you see midway, it's just full of those cliches. Okay. This is the Anti Midway in because it is so focused on Captain Ernst that. They That the other characters? Is Pretty much just doing the job I. Didn't write. The character as well is just. It's a guy who's supposed to keep these people in line. Keep them doing jobs. Keep them from panicking and. That's pretty much it i. mean think about something like. DUNKIRK! Dunkirk it was you know you just follow any soldiers doing that? Thing right right? If dunkirk appealed to you, the might actually appeal to you to well okay, so the recognizable faces of course Tom, hanks and Elizabeth shoot. You mentioned the only other person recognizes Stephen Graham. Does he get to do much. You get to know him. Well. I'll tell you about that in a little bit because that's that's one of the things that they do here. Is. You have familiar faces, but the not into that much you know. Some of the cliches that you have here that they avoid completely like There's one kid in here that they that. Tom Hanks and the rest of the crew you can tell they fucking hate this kid. because. He's he's. He's like the scare soldier. Yeah, you know he's the and in any other movie he'd be the one. Get somebody killed mess up. Something on the ship are he'd be the scary guy to come in and save the day later on step up, but this he's Fox up so much that everybody just looks at him and finally. Somebody says you do this one more goddamn time day. Fuck up one more time. Points like. Okay. Okay, yeah, he gives back and. They scared them off. But he goes back and does his job, and there's no cliches like that. They just every you must good. To me I thought it was a good thing. It's other people might see lack of character, but. The point of that is that Tom. Hanks plays a leader where he supposed to go in. and. Hold it down for everybody. He supposed to instill confidence in tells one person wants also starts to panic. He says remember training. and. That's his job is so what you do see? Here's a guy who. Who you know he's. Some people see him as being experienced enough to do this job, some people. They are confident nothing for him to do this job, he wonders. I don't even know if I'm capable of doing this. You know you even people like a committee him on like. Wow, you know. Anybody cracked under this shit. Yeah, so the soak the focal point is him and how this one guy has to hold everything now for this huge battle one the biggest battles to be done at sea during World War Two. You know now as I say it does that. Always translate well. No, because you're ready to ask Stephen. Graham Stephen You know you wanna see more done with people like Stephen Graham because again. This is sort of you. Get the feeling the beginning of the movie. Like Stephen Graham's character. He's thinking in command and you get the feeling that there's GonNa, be a spark shot spot captain Kirk thing going on with them William Shatner thing going on. It's like that's not even developed because again. Like I, said is almost like the movie was doing something and he just got attacked another film in Nate and get to go back to what it is that they were doing before. I. I appreciate that aspect of it because it does avoid allowed the things that we get tired of seeing in Warfield things that are starting to reach that point where it's like all right. This is predictable. Is something where? I've seen so many times that. Even though even in might be cool. Let's try to do something different. and Tom Hanks wrote this script so I think. That's probably why Senate the shit on him. A. Bigger when I? I read this group. Don't worry about it. Yeah, you know. But. I do think it was written to like not be your typical war film out there. WHAT THEY WANNA do is show you somebody, give you the the tension that you're supposed to get is putting yourself in a position of this man. WHO At any moment could if he dies. Every everything falls apart and that's a lot to be on person right there now. If you WANNA know my real complaint about the movie. 'cause I could someone out of the stuff again as I said nothing, everybody who's looking for a more traditional warfield, but this is something that just. Does not does not mean. They don't show you this in the trailer that trailer. It's probably put together in these days to not show this because nobody wants to see this shit, but rob Morgan around Morgan's yeah yeah great actor. Yes, yes, he is! He's in the movie, okay? Thank like Oh shit. Roy, Morgan being a great actor, he would have a major role in this film. You know you'd think that. Maybe he's like I. Don't know the first black soldiers on on this ship. Get small parts, but he's one of my favorite actors. Yeah. I understand that he'd get small parts, but God Damn You have to make. The cream of wheat man. Oh. That's his boy. His Bra Morgan who is up and coming great acting that brother. In this. Sub Servant roles like this anyway I mean I know that actors got take jobs I. Know that this and for the time period. That's how that's. How was the topic, but I don't WanNa see shit. Especially when you got movie about all these heroes and this dude, who's supposed to be up and coming Negroes? costantly serving in this movie. Is My. Mammy from gone with the wind gotTA. Make sure that that Mr. Tom Hanks eats. You know mayonnaise eight all day. There's brothers keeps a trait in his hand. Through this whole movie. Keeps the train his hand and After every battle at every battle come in and would've different with a different entree. Got corned Beef Hash Sandwich, will you? So. Crazy. Wouldn't you eat all day? I got a big as sandwich for you sir. So you've got to get up in some more sandwiches, they're God. His role was to read a menu. Hours I'm sorry I know people will, and it's not going to matter some people and I. Get it, but I. That guy's an awesome acting and I'm not lying I'm not exaggerating what you see right? Here is what he's doing serving. Throughout the whole field. Whenever, whatever whenever he gets a chance to come in. I think it was a moment that he was about to come in and gives them serious dollar on. TRAE it makes you about eight verse so if you don't mind my saying before you. BET! I'm feeling really just right now. You make me a little something. And, you know what they say. Ain't got him, you know. Acting slavish in here. You Ain't like. Mr Hang Soo. You Gusty, but it is. This close is like you know this eight eight days I gotTA. Make sure they he gets at least a sandwich or something. Airtime some happening. They're gonNA. Try to give him a big Geraldo roll up to some dirty shit. Now man, fuck all that. No No, no, not at all. I mean I can understand if he was even with somebody who? Was a name like rob. Morgan I know Roy. Moore the big name in Hollywood, but he's up there now. Be like alright. You get this brother more to do than this right here. It's a thankless role. There should be somebody. Who and he would if he was a day later, he keep telling me straight. Look Man I just took. What I I I got to work. Right shaming him for taking it anyway. You don't turn down being Tom Hanks pitcher I'm sorry. I. Don't know I guess I'm not I'm not him I don't know what conditions took an even trying to shame. This person for taking understand you've got take their roles, but I just feel bad looking at it like damn I mean you know, and it could be initially had more, but once they start editing it down. They like well. This breaks the flow. It's gotTa go, yeah. Yeah if you saw a movie realism and much more, too, I mean. Maybe there was some Dennis to serve. As some sandwiches to make. As he was talking Shit. you know it might have been the case, but yeah man I. That's one of the biggest complaints I had with all the other stuff can be debatable. will say that maybe. When I tell you about all the levers and the buns they had to push in the him real relaying messages back and forth because they do all this stuff. President pulled a lever commander ten. What do relate his back to that guy and they do all that and they do all over again. That is not going to be for some people. I will say that right now. It might drag a little bit. Put a fan of Tom Hanks. Even Tom Hanks doesn't have a whole lot to do beyond was. He's doing as far as commanded ship is. Some movie of urgency so. I guess the best way to break it down is if you're looking for a bloody straight out non, Stop Combat Field Warfield Film. On the side of something that we see lately, the more rated R. Graphic war films where you get to see the people's limbs blow off and guts hanging out and all that kind of stuff. You not getting that here, not at all. This is A. Dare say that this is something even a little more family oriented. A, but if you're willing to give this a chance on the level of all right. All that stuff has ran its course with me. Let's go ahead and see the war from another. Narrative perspective then this would probably be for you. Only besides the gas serving I agree with you I. mean you see it, but you ask how some of the other people I tell us. They dropped some lines. Which means you don't really see people again are once they focused on. The main story in cares. Just don't have any place anymore. Except for like small part soon, there that could be a little disappointing, but. It is worth the look is certainly as if I'd gone to see this on the big screen, we would have been saying like man. It looks great updating. This is amazing. What watching on Apple, plus which is where is right now? Apple, apple, plus TV or whatever it is I was fine watching it that way. You know it. Is that movie where you have great. Picture if you have a four K. television releases four K. been. Yeah, this is awesome man. But overall. Not Bad at all man. Kind of fresh. As far as a take on war and I, give it a matinee. And your wrap up. I feel like I. was one of those boats 'cause? You kept saying? But but but it was like which we which way you. Money on the Audio wrap-ups. Overlooks because I need to know I'm not talking. I'm an on you about repeating things, professor ask. You you. GotTa be professor. Insult me. How you like this is positive, but this is negative, but this is positive, but this is negative. And I was just like which we go land on this well, you know it's it's hard to. See How people following this? Because what's going to be one person's positive is going to be somebody. Else's negative definitely. Yeah, because you just not. Because the way this is advertised because they're not telling you that. This is Tom Hanks in his movie. About commanded his ship. They're making it. Look like you're going into. All these epochs ship data's and. And, yeah, it's in there, but not in the capacity that you get so that's that's why it's a little tricky because you got to let people know like you will. If you will enjoy this if you looking for something that is not a the ordinary. so let me ask you this. Do you think it is a mistake that didn't come out last weekend? Well considering that they would have been up against Hamilton. With the Stream and stuff going on now? Why because Fourth of July July because I mean it's a whole weekend's a three day. Weekend is plenty of time to watch both. Yeah! Because it's not really like you're against this other thing. You that's. That's a great question because. On the one hand you write for. The July would have been perp for something like this and they especially especially when you say, it's more suited for families. And you know different. It's a different demographic you now. You may have a point because you know. These old white veterans ain't going to watch. Black people play the founding fathers of America right so that is. Because NASA great question because normally would have said wow, yeah. is going up against Hamilton but I mean. I would think about it would have been. That probably would have been worth a chance I. Mean I'm surprised. I mean maybe just production reasons. They couldn't. I'm surprised they didn't push. Get it out. Another thing with A. Somebody Chats Fuck Hamilton. I hate man. Killed in a duel. I could have been because this was. Something that was originally supposed to go at the isn't the last minute they decided not the last night. It was like a couple of months ago to the side of the opponent, so maybe because they had to make some kind of arrangements or something. I, don't know. Maybe they could have thought like they would have been too much going on on that fourth of July weekend. Maybe everybody else has the idea of putting stuff up gas, but you know I mean that's. A war movie and they can get it out for them they try to. Yeah I do not know it'd be a perfect thing to look up because I don't have the answer to why they decide to do that, but that is. That would have been a great idea that definitely would. But let me just say this to. Streaming on Apple, plus and allow these old vets man. This shit got. Should they barely learn how to get Netflix's, so you know who? But Hey if you are at Gibb Grandfather's house and they happen to have apple plus put it on for him. I didn't even know this is on this. This is not got the isn't it? Hasn't got a whole lot of a marketing. Yeah, I guess so because even when you brought it up to me, I was like Sega Yeah. Yeah, a lot of people enough even for four Tom Hanks movie out. People didn't even so I. Hardly ever hear movies being on apple plus. That was a weird. Weird thing. I'm surprised they didn't hold out for something like netflix's and. Maybe, apple plus paid a whole lot because they're trying to build an offshore imperatives I don't know. You ask a lot of great questions. Man and I saw I don't have the answers for him, but they they all legit I. Don't know I don't know you got me thinking. Yeah, why didn't they do this shit? Damn Apple you stupid. But I do give it a matinee I. DO think worthwhile. But you have to again you have to know. What you get into, think when you really know what you're getting into, make a better experience for you. Get you prepared? We'll see. We'll see some I'm wonder how this is going to perform man I don't even know who's GonNa perform there will. Be An on a platform like apple, plus which isn't caught up at everybody yet, and it's not having as much marketing as a thinking. Thought we give for Tom Hanks movie. I guess. The Hamilton backlashes happened. Oh has it. I guess I. Mean I've been hearing more people. I Fuck Hamilton Oh. Is Passable at best. Well of course when it's something, everybody loves. That's of course going to happen Jesus. Maybe I should have held out I. Mean You you remember the frozen backlash. The movie on the was yeah. I didn't even know that I thought everybody loved Froze Asi. By love frozen out there. Oh. Let's see here. Tell you what we're about to get into something here. Talk about a series. That's coming up pretty soon before we do that. Let's take a quick break. And let me see. Let's take a quick break and we'll be right back. With our discussion of The boys season to drop the trailer for. We'll talk about that. You love the I loved it. Yeah I love to. I think it's still stands is one of my favorite superhero. He's honestly when it was done, I was said I was mad as Hell. I'm right there with the people. Stay tuned I'm sure a lot of you loved this series, too, so join us into discussion and we'll do that right after we get back from this Let's see into an email. I WanNa hang around all day. Renew Milk and no people sent us a lot here. Let's see. ooh! Have you guys had a chance to watch the heavy metal show. are the trailer I think it would be a fun thing, but you guys do critique because of how bad some of the acting in direction is really. What is a new heavy metal show? I heard them talking about a new heavy metal show. They put up. They put up a trailer in the email that comes from ill. Lives! I heard them talking about doing a heavy metal show really. Yeah heavy metal I the magazine or just the music. That's a good question here. Oh? This looks like he's Lad. is this. Is this a live action version of a heavy metal magazine Oh good Lord. No. Fit, that's the your first mistake. Nice see what this is right here. Raise original. You know what is a nudity in this thing. Sure was all over heavy metal. Yes, that's what I'm wondering I said. Let me look at this. is their nudity in this because they? I can't show this. All you boy sparring is in it. Which one wasn't a Michael J. White Oh. Yeah I. Don't think nudity in here. Being careful y'all. I'm trying to make sure so. Let's go take a look. What good a kingdom faced! Was Like Zach Snyder Directing director episodes Zena rates. People on. I don't know I. I'm so used to the idea of heavy metal being animated. Some little byas probably will not only that but. I mean the art was. At least sixty percent of what made heavy metal, heavy metal, and the fact that it was experimental and European. Yeah, and yeah, this looks like you like you say like like Xena. Is that. HEAVY METAL! Was You read it after? A lifetime superhero comments you read it kind of blow your mind. The going forward or it's raw there. There's there's nudity violence like I've never seen or just. The the design is so different than than anything I've seen before. This is none of that no. I, mean yeah, you got to stuntman who've rated a props department. Robot in the corner. Like a machine. Yeah Yeah, I. I. Don't know I haven't heard about this. Looks again like we were saying. Let's like any episode of Sindbad. Assumption I know. I'm not. Nothing nothing that's exciting me. I even know this was out me, so it's out. Our is coming. I don't know. You haven't heard about it I. Haven't heard about it I. Don't know what the hell this is now. But does that feeling of. GotTa Watch it just to. At least give it a chance. At least be able to talk some shit. So, let's TB fourteen. That's funny. 'cause. I discovered heavy middle when I was fourteen, but it was very. Dirty! Jeez you rediscovered. Lose this war. Situation Pitiful. So This is Sifi. Oh well shit man. Michelle lead with that. Sorry. I just. Outside. 'cause feel, but he was saying well. Yeah, there's explanation right there. I I don't anything about him. An fallen no I'm just I'm looking at the worst parts, but it definitely doesn't look like anything that would interest me. Slept Shit Outta you waste of my time. I'd be more excited to asylum. Walking in. Oh. Sorry Yeah, at least they would. At least it would have been funny. But Yeah Man I. Don't get it I mean I. I don't I don't I, haven't seen it I was a huge fan of the movie. Heavy metal but I didn't even know that this was on. I heard that they will make new heavy metal, but I thought it was going to be animated. Yeah, yeah, so I don't know I don't know. If. Anybody's seen it. Let us know I. Don't judge something I hadn't seen before, so we'll see. All Right? Let's go ahead and. Get into this discussion here. Oh, let's see. Off Bring up the trailer. I did not hold on you. Bring up the trailer for this. Use Me use me. There we go. Bring this up right here. soul I moved over. and. We go, so let's see. So I made a bold statement. When does come out like maybe two years ago you and a half ago? Wasn't all that long ago? I made a bold statement. Does a little over a year go? We'll go with that and I said that. The boys, the series on Amazon. is at that time was my favorite superhero property that was out there. They weren't afraid to go. Hard are with it. They had the same superhero tropes that you see all the time, but they put a little different spin on. It gave it a little more of an explanation of why they were there. That made all the difference. For something I thought it was just going to be some a bunch of just childish violence in the being one of the most thoughtful I thought superheroes stories out relevant socially relevant to. Yeah I actually really loved this, so the only thing that Piss me off was like you show me something so good and you stopped and made my ass. Wait for over a year to get the next one. I I was pissed off about that. I don't think you should do people like the. Watchmen come in right after. Yeah yeah watchmen. Watchmen was cool. Light Watchman's one of those things where it's like all right, you know what? The fuck is happening. And and that was Donald Purpose. You won't know until we get to this spot right here. You know every week I mean you don't? You don't have to understand a whole lot with? Somebody's getting a head crushed. Somebody's getting like oral sex in wish. The is. That understand every week. What I liked about it was that every week there was. It was packed with humor yeah. Was always knew that they did some violence which is like God damn? Yeah? Everything the real every weekday without do themselves like I, said a chick was like Gimson guy oral sex. And crushed his head. A lot of. Right there, put that together and. At the same time as I said you know? They were always revealing on every episode about how taken the superhero genre and just flipping around I really enjoyed that with this man. You know definitely something like watchmen was very thoughtful in. and was very intelligent like that. This was very smart, but also just it was a lot of just. Almost teenage Lee and what they were doing were, but it never really stupid that level like it could him. They just put out season two. Are the trailer for season. Two and Martin has not seen I wash is about three times today I'm really eager to sit here and see your reaction to this. So let's go ahead and get to it and we'll be back to elaborate even more after. This. Federal authorities have initiated a multi-state manhunt for William, Butcher. If anyone's Buck William Butcher or any of his notice, societas Marvin Milk Hugh Campbell or this man. Please call one eight eight zero cry. World still needs superheroes. So. Let's get out there. Is Technically. We all famous now. Don't you worry? Daddy's home. Chance. Was His name, Call Urban Karl. Urban is never look so crazy. Did you see the picture, his nostrils up to his island. US Looking Wild House, like I've never seen this man, look this crazy before. He scares me in this. That's going to be part of my discussion about this about about his character and some things that he's done. We'll talk about in a little bit regarding season to. have been through some shit. Again. Control. What's your being planned? All of it I, never love it. Never fucking love it. Now. I you twice lucky on showed up. September twenty fourth. I don't like summer goes by too fast, but I'm looking forward to that date right there, it said September, twenty four th, but what I read was not soon enough. Goddamn right about that. I mean is giving you everything and I'll. It looks like everything. I love from the first one I. Don't even more of Yeah Yeah just a little bit more. In advertising they're highlighting. The character. Of Butcher Carl character in this, he's one. It's taking up a lot of the spotlight here. He's GonNa. Allow the dialogue that you see. He's the one that everybody's teasing. Oh, he's back, but the one that I cannot wait to see. Is You, boy, highland of me I know. I look because I love this character I. Love this character. I hate this character so much, but he's so good that actor so good. That act is so great minute I look I mean he is so good at just being a Dick, not a villain, but a difference between being A. Dick. Like bill when you take on James Bond a superman addict when you put your kid off the road. Dig. Tipped. You really did not man. What's up? Dude think coming from last season. He's the thing you've got to remember that. highlander still somewhat of a child. You see these like he acts like He. He's in charge of everything, but he's. He's emotionally not fully developed imagine. All the superpowers in a will ferrell character. I mean look at that smile happy! Happy. Just, premeditated Dick nece right there. And, and here's the thing is the boys so if you think that this little boy landed on some Sawgrass Mall? No, there's a bone sticking out somewhere. Is Josh sticking out halfway across the line of something? Yeah, done nobody go easy. And never that well I'm sure they'll be all right. No No, not at all I mean if you get him to the hospital in time. We give me a shovel. I mean we can get. This character is not emotionally development. That's what. That's what I love about. This I think that that's A. He's having a rivalry going on with a kid. Yeah, Look Your Big Superpower S. Senate pages messing with this little boy I can't wait to see how that plays out well especially when you think about where we cut off last time. Yeah, no, I. Think I don't want to say what it was, but that cliffhanger leads to. Even more about his his emotionally stunted behavior, wise probably pushing that kid off the roof I want to see how that plays out. Because now. You got this guy who was unstable. WHO's? Being unleashed even more. This motherfucker terrifies me. Can you imagine if we if he was around two day or doing doing the protests and everything? Black lives on me shit. Black lives matter to everybody else, but. Yeah. It'd be like well I. Guess it sells at arguments. Everybody dick the t shirts off now. They want to let you know. He does not need to be around for billion these days. Were here they they they. Won the, first big gruesome things he did was just blast his black dude in here. Fuck off. Don't care. Take that. With his hands still. He blasted him so fast. He's still saying fuck. Like a cartoon. The Guy who plays his soul, amazing man. Antony Star I think that's you right? That's why I love that character so much because that guy plays him so well Australian. Actor think right because we see that kind of evil superman before, and it's almost kinda played, but this guy just brought like for so long. He was in the background, and then once he comes forward so much dimension to him. More than I thought I would. Expect from that. I thought that that character I thought I would absolutely. Hate this character man and I found myself. It's almost. Like men I feel form to yeah to a degree. Well if he wasn't. He wasn't like super, powered and murderers in murderers as You know being a being a brat. Being a big grown as Brett and having laser powers. It's a dangerous combination but I. was surprised at how much they made me feel for that character. That's why this season I'm looking forward to what they do with this. Because a lot of that came from The character development side of the science fiction aspect of the shown. Did you ever see that short that they did? Where'd they explain why? Homeland of probably is like he is no. That's probably why feel for this character. They did a short where they. These are. These are actually. A signed scientific experiments. The nuts the digit. The. Mutated people being put into like super super power close I mean the way x-men level you know. They had a short where they showed homeland as a kid brim brought up in a lab, and all these different people being brought out, so they just showed how as a child he never had any stability in his life. Use Your own up in Israel. sterile environment that just fucked up his brain, and never should have been let loose as a marketing tool. I way, I don't WanNA spoil it for a little bit of this this this. This is the one thing they made me see it. It was online its online, but it is one thing that made me feel like shit. No one of his guys disturbed. You know no, no one. No one raises boy right. And your always take care of me. Always. Out. It's okay. We'll take care of her. Just like the. Others. She Nannies Toilet. Paper They show that the like they've been doing a lot to this kid to make him scared, should so it's like that's kind of why he's. He has that whole thing of being a. Know needing needing a mommy figure in his life. If they explore more of their science fiction part, there were they show the how these people brought up in lab, and how that affected them the nets going to beat I. Think make it even better season. Well can't man. You got that that whole butcher at the end. Where you like okay, Yoho, reason for doing this is now in question. That's an you write about them as another thing that I hope that they. That they address because they. Make an they're making. It seem like Bush begged just for another fun romp with the boys, and it's like well. No, he he's. He seems much more driven and crazier than he did last. Like he's on a mission because they like even his is is just kind of like not focusing on anybody. In the first season. You know he's on his mission, but he seemed to care about his team, and now he just like come on. Boys are your less less. Out there. We're doing this. Yeah, y'all man. Yes, there's some things that happen. Yeah, fuck all that. Let's go. That's what I hope that I hope that from what we left off the they have to explore the moral complexities of this guy. Yeah, because he was fucked up by the end and I know people I love. How ended where we're not gonNa tell you what happened at the end of the season one, but if you watched season one, it's kind of divisive. He does something where some people like. Well. You know what he went through and I'm on. I'm on the side like that was a little crazy. That was uncalled for what he did and I. Hope that that's explorer. Even a little bit more out the even take it to the point with bushes, even seen as kind of like all right, you'll start to turn to limit of a billing yourself. Did. They do that in a comic. No no okay. But this is already way better than. Half of the COM. Yeah, yeah, it's. It's the kind of gets better. The longer it goes on, but this is still better. Yeah. Also there was that whole thing with foreign powers starting to make their own. Tournament a super villains. Dave teased at They've teased that. Not, only are they going to? START FOCUSING On some other characters, but they're gonNA. Start talking about the political side of things too, and they've already teased that. Would a few things for one. Teased by bringing in somebody that everybody was wondering. Why is this guy even here? What is it black and war? A what oh? That's right. That's right. Yeah, yeah, blackmore, when he brought here their Batman character. Yeah, it's like for the whole time. He didn't do shit right like. Is He a minority? What is what does he do besides just dress up? Like snake eyes from Gi Joe. And I guess the whole time they were like. That was Donald Purpose. Just wait because I was one of the people I was like okay. Everybody is cool I'm loveness, but what the fuck does that guy do? Take. Turns out that the detainees in like he's won the probably the most bad as member on the team. When they introduced the political side of it because they've already shown that. What happens when it gets to terrorist hands, and they start making terrorist superheroes, and now they gotta send. some of the the soups as they call them. They gotTA. Take Them Outta Fun love and Marketing Image that they have actually sin them on secret missions to stop all these people who were on. What was it called Something, v a compound think what was called. The got to keep that from making a terrorist and other Other figures from four nations pretty much super weapons. took. Still Thinking about how you? Thought. Taylor to in transition. Right they're. Caught that expresses welk. Now, you read man that's that's. That's that I'm glad to see them. Expand on. That's one of the reasons why I like. This is my favorite. My favorite superhero property because they're not just going into the supernatural area. They have a nice scientific explanation for what's going on and this one the A. Few, Superhero Properties, where I've I've seen it in, says exaggerated at all. This stuff is man. You've managed to really fit this in the real world. Pretty well they have. The the Justice League movie we desert. Zach, Snyder says. Martin See. You know what I'm looking forward to So. We just talking about Elizabeth Shue, she was so great. In this show man, she was yeah. I was so happy to see her. Be Given like a great role. She killed it that, but they got some new people coming in. who going to be kind of taken her role on our her position at least they tease Giancarlo Esposito, man. Everywhere she is a villainous, is fucking everything he's in. He's he's lex luther on the Harley Quinn show. Are you serious and? All of these rows, he's playing gusts frame. Sit I'm Blake I'm making blue meth over here making Blue Kryptonite. I'm making compound V. Blue over here he. Yeah I gotta ask you after watching this because I'm looking forward to him. In this role now you've got me thinking like okay. is He really playing kind of the same character? As where you make a great villain, and everybody's those are all the scripts. Come into him and he's like well. It's work. Mono! Shit. Dressed just like gus fraying when not wearing his chicken uniform? Me This is the same, got the same glasses and everything man. Have you heard of something called the broken the bed. No, what is slipping on AMC today? Just seeing what's on the channels and it's coming soon. The broken the bad is a trailer and looks like it showed him. It's like it's alternate. Ultimate earth alternate universe breaking bad shorts. Stories! You're really gonNA milk, the shit out of. Just get. Gus Spraying common out. You know what we. Know what you should, you should make a cooking show at Gus. So to make his. Special better. When he assisted can get it right around slices box. Carefully Rolls. Backed off of watches. Now, what are we? But look at this if he's playing the same character chickens. subheading sixteen. We need a top secret Yankee White designation for compound state. Only one man okay is that you want to stroll into the oval? Office and start barking. Orders, Oh, yes, have our own heroes don't compound being veins. You on China find. He's like gusting accent in little more and more gay. Who Cares? Retire about those no house. Yeah, I don't know how was cited. Not You and you talking about doing unbelievable Fuck Negra? wrote a SIP. Suck. People will think back to his character in those. Maze runner movies. As right? That's right flaming. Man We'll see I'm still looking forward to it though I'm still looking forward to what he's doing this man. Yeah I tell you this much though. Trail almost as a warning. So you know if you thought you were offended by some of the things that happened in the first series of the first season. As far as violence goes, then you don't WanNa come around here for a second season because. At this point we again. Doubling down on all of it, I'm just looking some of the violence. They doing just like John just challenged with the city. It's like man with need. Not want all that blood on his suit. That's what makes it look cool. Just do. Serious Yeah Man I'm. A lot that A. That I'm looking forward to hear man. I really am I. I. The virus never been something took Leeann. You know like going hard and stuff like that but. It could be with all the goal that they have in here. The definitely tell you this going to be a lot. But I thought the riding was so good in the first season, and it looks like they're teasing on elaborating those things even more yes. It's it's funny. How at first it can feel a little gratuitous, but then quickly you'll like. It's making a point, yeah! Yeah No! I mean. Look at it, and I'm kind of repulsed by. It's like well. You supposed to walk, yeah, you. Guys, Middle Finger just got sliced off his body, still floating Aaron squishing People's heads. It's like. Looking at this and you know you're. You're you're you know you get hard or something? Wrong with you, but yeah, I Very much looking forward to this man. So we'll see September twenty fourth. Anthony you looking forward to add no, no, no I'm I'm excited. Yeah Yeah same here. I'm going to try to get it to where hopefully maybe we can get. episodes okay. Yeah, yeah! I'm trying to connect with people, so we can get Tehran. Tomatoes is kind of helped in that area. Really Yeah. You mentioned the name by the way. Hail Hydra and rotten tomatoes. Come right on in Mr Coleman you come in and drop those tomatoes, people. They pay attention. Man I had that at times when they're like. Hey, can I get screener for this? Yeah. You're rotten tomatoes, aren't you? Come on in then being able to show like that. You have your own dedicated. Just a cascade reviews on there. I'll think it helps that. We got a lot of splits. But. Certainly the link to the page because I can't find I was looking for it one time just type in double toasted rotten tomatoes. Okay so you're right to all right. At least that's what I did. Because I look I. Don't know the the direct linked to our page. Show you. Since, we're talking here. Let me, see what happens. Yeah, I'm on type in. Let's see. Let's go over here so I'm type in for anybody who wants to look at it double. toasted. ROTTEN TALL! Their mantle. Of. CORRECT ANYWAY THERE YOU GO! Yeah, look, look. Okay, take your right to it. They haven't updated the shit. Some fresh. Fresh about fifty fifty. Even don't a lot of tomatoes that people. let's see. Yeah Man! I'm trying to be more favorable even gone in A. Put reviews of some of movies that something like some of the bad reviews Oh. Really Yeah, Oh, how funny! Yeah I saw mortal Kombat on there. I'm sure they're like. Hey, there's nothing else coming out. Yeah, there's more to combat. Oh mortal. Kombat! Scorpions revenge. But. They have put up some other stuff you my saw like. I saw them put up a old movie. Where where is IT MISSISSIPPI TO? Me Yeah Hammer is up there. Yeah. It needs to be updated, but we got the page man. So. It helps it really does help. Putting that out there so I think I'll think I'll be able to get us some early screenings of the boys so that we can actually. Review it in well. You'RE NOT GONNA be able to bench. That's another thing. was that. Maybe I don't know if they're putting all the episodes at the same time so maybe they would give us four episodes to review I prefer that they're trying to bench all of it. Being forced to all at one. All, right you're. Talking about. With. The art used to support the independence out there. You know the is an. Didn't go out, then do all the things that Hollywood says. You've got to do to succeed. I used to help the struggling artist out there. Just talk about all these superheroes Superhero. You guys are the prom. Eileen reviewing bad movies, instead of helping these poor artist out over here, it was wrong with well. You know we agree. Morning I got together I Martin. Wanted actually got a mind like you know man. It's refreshing to sit back and. Why Son does not odd as studio bullshit. Say No sir. You're right. So today. I went out there and a gun the op-ed. Settlement Hammock in a saw this movie sometimes, what is it sometimes always never sometimes always never. Tell. You folks that you. You're not going to hear about this movie, I'm going to be honest with you if it's you be something that you see scrolling on Youtube are you just run into by accident? You know something net. A lot of people haven't heard about. Allow people not going. Go see as the sad thing to say about this film. Whether we like it or not, is just that somebody homework, stop and these days especially doing this corona times people just not going to see it, but. Let's not talk about the movie. They're ban. Let's see if we can actually get some people to go out there and see this movie. That is if it is indeed a good film. And that's what we're going to tell you. Let's go look at this trailer for sometimes always never, and we'll be right back with our review. Whenever you make a decision. Whatever you choose. There's another universe somewhere. You made the opposite choice I can't remember way set to meet now. See. There are mysteries. You'd like this. It's like scrabble any with pick princesses. What's the pig princess? Left to make this. Work on, we'll come back and we'll. Talk Tim bring a toothbrush which you want. Cyberman or All X is missing episodes time. All we ever talked about was shape I'm. Thinking about justice scores very high problem. Fussy making this a bit more interested. Away jet. Chicks. Russian peasant. You Hustle. Hustle him a smashed. Goes. The going to look at the body one the might be on Michael and you. Two hundred quid when you put it like thoughts. Welcome to stay. There's a cow. Walks, past a bus stops the same office higher fatal speak. System. The thing you have to remember about these is sometimes always never. EXP- race. He signed on my computer. Where have you seen those words before? A game scrambled. Mike, Leigh's to play. Who is coming back? What am I going to be scared? All the only thing I'm scared on his dying before I sorta the. Talked about. Mason, Guy. He mentally feeble. On the. Joint six. We learn. Jackson. The, Experience Isla? Sir LA, Earning. I mean. Out of money. Data the same. picked. Trying Now. Look we think about this movie argued that was funny. Unexpected. Could seeing the trailer. Let me change. The I saw the trailer, but I didn't see it all the way through. Because I remember tested. He got back to this thing and his ass. Man. Yoga. I'm so I got two points off that young? You had his. Trailer that had came. and. So. One of the things have. An interesting thing that I found out about this movie when I was looking some stuff up on is the director name's Karl Hunter. Does that ring a bell. No it doesn't. mean the. But do you remember the ninety s early nineties when there was a new? Like new Britpop invasion now going on, yeah, do do you remember saw groovy train? From the Far Karma come on come on. Come on, get on Net groovy train. That sounds familiar. You recognize if you've heard what the instruments. Ruby. Train. That's why didn't talk about God thirty years later? I Yeah groovy train May. Did on that groupie train yet is that's a band called the farm. The basis for that ban is the director. Okay for this movie right here. Not that makes any big differences, just the interesting thing, but. Sam Riley In a bill nine. Bill, Bill Nye Hiya been night, he they. You can probably tell by the trailer, but it's someone up without telling you too much. They're sort of a strange the way you know they. They've kind of grown apart over the uses. Stay friendly, but. The thing that's going on with them is that. Sam Riley's character. His older brothers missing Bill Nye. He's son. just ran away from home one day in. They never saw him again. You ran away as a kid and they never saw him again so now it's about them trying to still find out if this guy is out there through the hilarious misadventures of despondent son duo right here, it's also important to know that. He ran away because he got mad. Over game of scrabble squirrel yet scrambled. scrabble plays a lot throughout this movie it does it does, and this is so. Look this so artistic? When I saw the trailer. See all the trailer, but I did see some of it. At first, I thought that this was just a cheap as move fun because I'm like Damn. That's an obvious Greece screen on a fake as road right, the can do better the net that's an. That's the artistic choice. That's intentional. Actually do the like a profile of the car driving down. The street is actually cutouts and all this stuff so. Mary Wes Anderson A. That's a great way of putting it. Some people might look at it as oh. Wow, that's that's pretty cute, and that's pretty artistic. Imagine if some people might say well, that's just fucking. Pretend pretentious, but you know that that. That threshold that you would have for movie like this. It's it is artsy. To the point where? You don't know what time is taking place in, but in is taking place in a time where people cell phones in CDs. They place down. But the whole art, aesthetic of the film is sixties. Kit. Sixties pop to early Seventies Kitsch I love that I know you do that's why. When I saw it, I was like. You might take a fancy. Fancy was tickled. I love. A love is movie man as far as the art direction goes. I love the lighting always. You can tell that they always strategically put a spotlight certain areas even when his own houses like this. You know everything in the movie. The Color Palette I love man You know everything is bright and colorful, but also everything is again. Has that sort of the fifties and sixties and seventies POPs color scheme that's happening in their even have kitchen throwbacks to the seventies a label. Maker plays a big role in this. I like that like that a lot But also like that they have. The characters in here, the movies very very low key. We'll say deep deadpan, but very little rail low key, yeah! There's never ever. Again this appeals to me. Just like with the last movie that I was talking about Greyhound. This seems to go against those conventions and tropes that she would see in dramas and and e an are drama. These like this everybody's low key things that would happen. Would you think they'd be big emotional? Blow ups then, not man. Talk it through. Yeah, yeah, it's. It's weird because you do expect. It's almost like okay, here comes. It didn't happen, but. I was kind of known that I kind Kinda liked that people are just hanging back into talk and shit out. Even if they're being smart asses about it, sure nobody gets to upset. Nobody's yelling at each other. The whole time I appreciate that one it. Helps with the teenagers in here man day, not brats. Boy So refreshing Oh. Somebody knows that all kids aren't assholes. Yeah, and I'll sit here. We go because the first time we introduced to. Samrat characters son in this thinking, he's got the fucking. Brad home got those fabulous gloves and Luke. PODCAST keys playing a video game. He's going to be you know he's GonNa. Do that thing when people talk to him going to leave me alone, the playing video games and now they went against that he might have start like that just a little bit of for a little bit because. GRANDDAD is there to say hey. I'm sleeping in your bed like Oh. Right. Yeah he's like okay. Because easily expect mold as a clown. Way Up this. Isn't a bit tonight. I'm sorry. Lewis Healy's the name of the kid that plays a role right there. They actually do some great bonding with GRANDPA and grandson in here. Need. Not done that way where they gotta go through a bunch of fighting in pushing and pulling and fuck your GRANDPA. You don't know me all the kind of bullshit. They. For movie that seems so. Again So artsy to the point that it would seem almost kind of fake. I kind of found the relationships here to a little more real than I find him in other films. It's got that aren't aesthetic and yet the characters don't go that way to where they're become cartoons. They're always. They're always real enough. Like, whatever's around them can have? That color scheme can can drop into cut out, but everything else stays in a world that we can feel. Yeah, no, definitely definitely you know I. GotTa tell you. We used to watch. Our films like this, especially independent from Britain a lot in the nineties. Yeah, you remember those yeah. Go to the morning screenings of this. Yeah, sometimes every now and then they would do a evening screening of these movies when. Streaming and home home video wasn't the wasn't like. It is right now, right? I just have a sort of nostalgia thing going on I kinda I'm a little biased I. Miss Movies like this man. Yeah exactly! Yeah, yeah, I. I. Like okay, I get it. They don't make any more and I know they're not profitable. But it's always. Nice does have something different. It really is even though it's familiar. I. Got A confession to make to you. Martin I forgot about this movie until today. Because I was going to wash, we were talking about like well, since not come into this Friday I'll watch and. I I. Didn't I didn't think about into the last minute. I gotTa Watch this movie, so that's why I brought my pen and went out to the back and lay down and watched it but I. You know I'll watch some of this. Probably get it in. I'll let you just take the rest of it, but once I was into an like. Man I'm actually having enjoyable moment when this. Having a real nice time with this, not think that. If I can get real. Didn't have I. IF I can get real. Sinophile on you right now. you've got most sound like again. Some pretend shit that I'm talking. But there are some movies where they do certain things and they want that message to be out there. And sometimes you look at a moving take that thing away from me and I. I looked at this and I said. No one's saying. Maybe I don't know but. I. Haven't read on his movie. I heard about saying anything like this, but I was like mean. I. Get the feeling that they're putting things out that lady's messages out. They heavy for people. Because once you get the gist of the movie and what's happening with? Main two characters. you start to think like. Why did they choose other than just to be artsy? Why they choose the sixties and seventies aesthetic the to happen with this and what you learn, what's happening with these characters? It's like well you know I. Mean maybe they're saying something and just not being really blatant with it, you know maybe chose not for the looks, but I mean he's took care to the kind of stuck in time with each other right because it, because I mean this tension between them or at least Sam Riley. He seems put out with his dad, the entire time and bill naive. He's just a charming dude. He really. All the way through to the point you like. I don't understand why you mad at him. What is it? They can't what? Why are you still feel like this? But it is a they are stuck in time. Yeah, there's this ton stuck with them from back in a certain day in in I. Don't know when this movie takes place. They have cell phones. I mean, but this could have been early. Two thousand I don't know. Could have been late nine two thousand nine, but you know I time period it is, but it seems like well. You know maybe chose period because everything looks like is in the sixties, not just with these people here it's like the houses in the neighborhood of colored pink and maybe. England. Look like this. Anytime, you leave London everything else. Still. I'd never progressed. But I really did enjoy this man. It's not a long review because this is a new, no small art film and it's a very small movie it is. But. It reminds me of those movies that Arsov back in the day also where I said okay. Movies they can do a lot with a low budget man I can tell you the budget on his movies probably low. But, it's funny what you can do. When you make a few colors pop, you do get creative with your lighting, and you create a story that look it might not be fair everybody, but it's it's Y-, these I can guarantee these characters. You will like bill, Nye! He is such a slick motherfucking you I mean. You can't help but like him. When it was I going I was like. All right well. There's a little bit slower than I. Thought I. Don't know where it's GonNa go, but when he gets that end, and has that scrabble game I was I was totally hooked from that. Point Yeah. The whole way he plays that. was fantastic. Does that Oh did? Did I win? I'm sorry I don't know he's playing scrabble with the couple. Yeah, it almost feels like a road trip movie, but they're not really going anywhere in the beginning of the movie. They go somewhere, but that's about it. Yeah, yeah, it's a road trip movie. That's only. Partially about the road trip. Yeah. I'm not trying to convince people to watch this unless you know you. Look, you can look at this trailer automatically whether this is for you would not, if you, if you lean towards something like this, all is only a matter of watching and seeing if it's a bad movie or not. But if you are in the movies like this, and you know smaller films, more art films more, you know more films where they it is very heavy in style small budgets. I think this is worth a look. I I enjoyed this a lot man I mean the only thing is agree with. Do it probably took just a little while to start and even then at the beginning I thought that they would be in just a little too weird. I thought some some things seemed forced. They were little, were little funny, but only because the people that were doing these things Bill Knight. He's just funny man like when he went to the ice cream truck is like alright. This is funny, but if y'all keep this kind of weird shit, going on that you know, movie starts if it's non take off right away that fear of am about to lose ninety minutes of my life. Yeah Yeah. But, it didn't take. It didn't take long at all once Sam Riley comes into the picture. If you recognize Sam Riley. It's probably probably recognize him as the bird dude from. Malefic into something. That's right. That's right. It was also anybody who knows joy division. He was in a joy division movie guy named Ian Somebody. who was lead singer Joy Division and Prejudice and zombies. That's right. That was him I was in. Yeah. That's the Ian Curtis doesn't check it out. Check it out a highly. Do highly recommend If. You are of that Ilk. I give it a give it a matinee because I will say this somebody who likes it It's appealing to what I like and he's kind of movies. You know these kind of films today. Do you really really really really need to go the theater to see them? Unless you go into one of those I tell you how you should do and nobody's doing. It'd be great for people who like these kinds of movies that theater where they served dinner. Are you know Nice Drinks? Don't do this why you say. Pandemic. Acid after all this. Okay wasn't in that perfect world without the pandemic. Yes. When it was really nice art theaters where they have higher end food and you're to get drinks afterwards. My wife and I would have gone to see something like this because she don't want to see all that big crazy superhero Bush watch this. No, no, she didn't know she probably would like to, but we have gone out ahead drank. She would have been like when I'm glad. At least there's some artistic married to this, and not all the bullshit, but derailing need to see. At a theater knows specially right now as you see. Yeah, that I felt the same way for all the things I. Love about this and it would be a matinee it. There's nothing about that warrants going to a theater unless you just made a special night. You're have special night plan at thought well. We'll throw this into because it's. It's very short. I think it's in less than ninety minutes. It's pretty straight up ninety nine minutes. Yeah. Get Mad Matinee, but again no, you have to rush out and the thing is going to be on video very soon. Anyway, I'm pretty sure. Give it a couple of weeks of the beach somewhere. Yeah Yeah. I liked it I liked it. Oh. Let's see I reign. REWARM emailed, and we're Outta here and we being for while. Actually the few things we did. We did some good this evening. Are you. GonNa Watch Greyhound. At this point. Still have to you know you'll. Probably you know what check email right now. If you got it. You said the email off today. Yes, if you got, people will be right back on on email and we'll see you in a little bit right after this. Right. let's see. Let's see what we got here. While Mars chicken is e mail I'm checking my email. Welcome Martin. I told I told you the answer pretty quickly. Hey, if you watch right now, we can wait and you can review it after the. SEE HERE! Mr Yeahs man says call Giancarlo. ESPOSITO is in a video game. Far Cross six. Rumor has it that he might be a villain in far cry six. Plan what Gus Frei. Doing your thing as long as he. These is what here's. What does it would Giancarlo Esposito for me man? Is like no matter. What billy he's playing. He's always got. Those guys didn't glasses on the glasses. The suits the suit. He's always fastidious. Should I think even? Even men Lori, was he? Always got those glasses man. let me see here. We were talking about people having a backlash Hamilton. On this is what they're talking about. Greetings Professor S. Will, you gotta Angola you probably man but you. You. Let a professor and. Sit Let me. Give them up the floor. I don't want to get. You upset. said it was fun. Because you can quit. You'd even think about it, but you didn't miss a beat. fucked. You profess the ask. I say fuck you. Man, the sentiment was behind it. It's it. It was implying I it was the name flexing was. said if I had to make you mad. Put that out there and it was worth again. That's that'd be laughing man. Now we'll get all kinds of pictures gave Coleman professor. A now. It wasn't even a s S. it was as easy professor I S. Oh man between gorilla. Came Eli Chris Tucker. Looking for your sweet and Sour Chicken ads. A. Oh, man uses say some system. Just crack me a man. Greatest professor. Believe the article. Below mainline U s to some of the objections to Hamilton. Feel free to peruse at your pleasure. Keep in mind, Karna Brown who sent that email I am not against the people that don't like Hamilton I know that there are some people who won't like not Airbus on like everything all right. You know so. I understand that. So I'm not making fun of anybody at all on new to Hamilton, I love it, but definitely not going to be one of these newbies like you don't like Hamilton. How stupid are you are Philistine Yeah I'm not going to be. I'm not going to be going to that guy. If you're talking about the thing with. Slavery. I'll tell you that I looked at. It felt like it was something that felt a little outdated when it came up, but I definitely didn't take away from. From the movie for me. Puerto Rico's uprising in the instrumental in instrumentalization of Windmill Miranda. Okay, it's not what the hell's gone. Dan when you know you've got famous. Got Big. People just find hand kind of way to like. Hey, they're right and think pieces about me. Yeah, yeah, you just make this to start making up shit about you. I'm an industry now. I gotta read this man. The fuck mood. When Linda Will Miranda 'cause the hurricane. I had to read. This is happening with that, but. Anyway. Donate a shit ton of money to Puerto Rican. Puerto Rico relief diddy. Okay. I don't know I i. don't Know Me. Hey like I said. Pam I understand it. You know I would I would say this. If, you generally don't like it. That's one thing, but if I get the feeling that somebody's liking it because they hipster shit, everybody else likes it. then. That's when I would be like come on, man, stop the bullshit. Because you know, there's people out there like that let me see. A couple more here than we'd be on way. Let me, see here. I think we might. That might be it Devante? Brown has a question. Hello want to ask Martin. What he thought so far the final season of agents of shield. He says I quite enjoy it so far. They're having fun with time travel, even addressing racism and accidentally being relevant. And they also we've been in elements from agent Carter as well, which was very underrated I was hoping that you may talk about it weekly as a way to add segments to clip out for the site, since the show has a dedicated fan base, and hopefully core after joined the ghost rider episodes you able to watch. Some of the show are more of the show now. Cory. Core can have on segment where I talk about this show that you watch every week. You know what if I man I have offered you like a show segment? I mean I don't to offer you, but if you want if you want something. Yeah, like you came in and told me like I. Want Segment where I can talk about. Keep people updated with. This particular show if I felt like enough, people want to see it then. Yeah, really yeah. There was something that you want to talk about I mean I don't want to dedicate something because one person say hey I want to see this because. You know I'd rather. It'd be something that people are. I guess in large viewership are going to pursue. I can't imagine something that a large viewership is watching that you wouldn't just watch yourself. I. Let you talk about it I'd ask questions. Okay, yeah, I'm pretty good at. You might not think so but I can. Sit back and leg if you if I would just ask that, it'd be prepared and organized. That's all you know I. I do strongly. That's the one thing I do very strongly believe in your that segments need to be prepared because. I've seen it too many times whether people think it doesn't happen to not seem too many times unless it is really a very casual conversation show where things if you don't if you're not. If you're talking about a critique, you're not prepared and don't have stuff you know somewhat organized. It can go all over the place. So I would I would love to see if What you have and you want to do something like that. Okay now you got any ideas. Not? I'm actually not even watching all that much. TV, however, I did yesterday happened to get caught up on agents of shield. I didn't realize how many episodes I was by. Was it devante Brown yes, yeah, he's right about those recent episodes they they've been fun. They've been. They've been travelling in time. The fifties in the seventies and they've been exploring racism quite a bit more than most shows do. When the season when this season started, it's it's weird. Season Seven. Yeah, and this is the final season, but those last three seasons have all started where I was like feeling like I. Don't know man I feel like this show is losing it or maybe I'm just over it and I just stuck around a habit, and then around episode, three or four I'm I turned around with like Oh. No I'm I'm actually digging this a lot now and having watched three episodes back to back yesterday on my. Back to looking forward to this show. When he gets, you just count the. Don't let me do the talker. You got boss. Early he's talking straight out of thirties moving when they get hand, you count Dot doughy amongst. A robot. These guys. Boys lost. I'm ascension chronic com from the planet CRONICA too. Good for you. Now beat it. Before we make you freaks regret the born. Chronic cons are not for okay. really hope he's robot actually. Realize that he's not that that the guy who is a robot is about takeover. Acts like a robot. Bomb on? Warning you. Last chance PAL. Take A boy's. Get you what I'll tell you the thing that. Made me now. What's? The alien some. He's changing right now. The thing that. Made me not watch. Agents of shield is like they were doing the same thing. They would do on Netflix where they weren't acknowledging the Big Universe to the point where it just seemed like it didn't even make sense. No, no, they acknowledge a bigger universe all the time they've had nick fury guest star on on some episodes, but that was early on because that's been the biggest complaint throughout Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, that was early on and then. Post that I mean even in the most recent episode award winning most recent episodes Colson talked about how somebody was like well. You know you're dying. Is What inspired the avengers in the first place, so there is some acknowledgment, but they don't. They don't mess with them. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about like. They like a lot of people. I've heard complaints with. A big part of it, but like the snap they don't refer to anything. No, yeah, you know people like to see the doesn't people have actually said at this point where? They don't acknowledge some the big events so much that people even wondering. Is this like an alternate dimension? I mean it really is its own thing when. I'm not even thinking about the movies. Yeah. But that's one of the things always bothered me, and that's why I could never get into it, but you know I don't know. But, yeah, man I hear that it's fun makes me WanNa Watch it, but I'm also intimidated about how many shows of course now seven seasons and it's a network show, so there's a lot of episodes. Yeah, yeah I don't know if I can actually get into so much going on, but there you go, so be talk about it if you want everyone a segment where you want to come in and talk about it a little bit I mean the show is fine, but. The whole show. Well, you know what's out there Martin okay, all right I own now you'll be extended the offer. Am I gonNA. Be Less more. Let me, see let me see I. Think it was going to say there's one last one but I think this idea. Because all the emails of people recommending bad movie reviews. So. Let me see. I'm going to do it, and you hate me for doing it, but I'm gonNA show you Lorenzo's idea for new show. You go let's see. Renzo has a show for a new. Idea for a new show. Show, for new, ideas. The see! Are you ready? Monitor all right? This is. The premier of Lorenzo's big idea for a new twist show. Coleman in I had sex with the vacuums gone on Hulu. As obviously core right, they're very happy. With vacuum down. They don't WanNa. You don't want to give everything away at this point in. The title though you only do the backing you, might you know just bringing pleasure, look into. Because teeth rated. At least got the headline, right? There you go by Lorenzo Shelly. Lorenzo tell you what man you send me there right there. Don't even change anything. Just send me this and make sure that this goes actually to Hulu. Well. I've got connections. We are ready to producing the show over at a Netflix. See back in present that to them over there. I just don't want to overwhelm them. What all these great ideas? Want. I'm having a good. Taking me back Lorenzo I can tell you then. Right everybody. See here when we about closer. As, we close, that, are just ask you this. Martin Babylon five says. Do you remember Shit? I know it is a show I never really watched it okay I was good enough for him I think. Right everybody! That is it thank you so much. Remember. Subscribe, please, also we have. The bad movie reviews for you to vote on Godzilla jaw. Spahn Wild West you gave scriptures, so we'll be putting up the poll. On our INSTAGRAM, also on our facebook for you to go in and vote on. Join us on our double Tosa discord tiny oriole dot com forward slash the DT discord. In that is then. Thank, you guys so much. We'll see you on the next one. Until then, thank you Martin Thomas. You Welcome Oh Until then has been the cat daddy. Professor s? Oh people I love it. I'm coming here. With a tweed jacket on both awesome glasses. Good evening. Ladies and gentleman I am professor I asked. My colleague carry on. It'd be risks. Reservoir professor showed. US. Thank you so much, so don't you ever stop being? Dots Oliver Stop, being you. I'm talking to you. Talking to you just ricky. Seats. Who made that zealous fast. Jose Jose. Thomas! You're talking about is that you ask trying to get in here? That quick. Jose you know what I got another, say man. We'll leave it like that. Cool. As Casey. Email dot, com, you email. Questions comments, compliments hopes input and vice. Social Media. Twitter Instagram Facebook Wolf Utah with me. Give me up on facebook. Dot Coleman Five. Thomas finally on twitter and Instagram it at Martin's undistorted fro or Mine Thomas on facebook. And join us. This Friday. Yes, we have a screening this Friday. Join us, and the odds wants to do something Friday and I got to do it because I got. Like saying we can everything for Friday. We're going to be reviewing movie. Join US likes this. One might be one bad movies that you guys pick. Feel. Oppression. Join us. World syllables studios. With world has gone. That S! We mean that in the nicest way because we want you to be safe to. Awesome is not safe right now. Telemarketing is. Monitoring Florida. Isn't. Yet man look. Number one Florida could not have. To! Be. Thought there. is a matter of crazy. Our Buck up, US. Take, it's the. Price. Already by stay home, stay with C. You whenever we can take Ms Dot, com get a hold of his there and let us know when times to save. Your plans Austin all right good night, the morning and afternoon. Good evening whenever you're listening to a watching this goodbye and stay to stay.

John John Wayne Charles J Biko John John US Tom Hanks Martin Thomas Ryan Reynolds Instagram Martin Stephen Biko Madame me Louis Della Luna Joe I Mel Gibson Freddie Krueger York Danny Glover Katrina WanNa Authority
Podcast: Ooma zooms ahead by focusing on the customer

Telecom Reseller

15:59 min | 5 months ago

Podcast: Ooma zooms ahead by focusing on the customer

"This is the green and on the publisher of Telecom reseller and today I'm with Steve Biko. WHO'S THE HEAD OF CHANNEL SALES FOR UMA They, thank you for joining me today. Thank you. So you know it's been a very interesting year for I think almost everyone listening. It's certainly been interesting year Bruma in the in the past year or so who has gone through a process of transformation has become a full-on enterprise ready company in addition to its more storks small in smaller end products So today we're GONNA be talking today about where they are with products what's happening in the market and specifically what's happening with their channel program. I if you know what Izumo what today. Yeah. So we went today is a purveyor of communication suite of services that is targeted to the SMB midmarket, and now enterprise we're doing this not only through you know cloud telephony hosted voice or you want to deem it from a cloud perspective. We're also starting to deliver some other ancillary synergistic services like you know, fixed, wireless backup, own wife, five a life I can activity in from the land, and so it's it's really meant to provide more services. Right more. Services internally to support not only the IT infrastructure you know at the core of it, all the the businesses and the entrepreneurship we're actually winning those from an SSD perspective. So, we are a pretty expansive company and we're growing pretty rapidly on on pretty much all fronts in the business community. So, there's a sector. That's a big transformation. I think a lot of people. I guess almost every one of our listeners and readers have heard of Luma. But I think they know wrong things about it. and I'm sure as a channel partner had you you count that to amongst the channel. Yeah, this there's some truth to that I think what I think what people have historically known as what has deep roots in starting our businesses residential provider and what what I think is really key with all of it is that the DNA of Luma is making our solutions very simple to digest survey simple to engage with. When you look at the residential market, you're talking about people who may not be technically adept at you know things like boy or some of the acronyms that come with it. So we've had learn how to deploy in provision in a very simple way. for that for that home user whether it's a grandparents or somebody who doesn't have any of the experience or just like you know I won't make fun of my wife, but she's she's not the most technically adept i. it always struggled with a have to make it really hook cookie cutter. Simple. We've taken that kind of mentality and mindset into the business sector. So when We came out into the B. Two B. Market a few years back with office. It was all geared on how do you make? It's so simple to to provision in you know one of the terms that often gets thrown out in new caz plug and play in the eighteen years I've been in new. This is truly the most plug and play environment I have ever seen when. It comes to actually having the phone should be able to just plug writing your land and go, and we've made it three click to provision simple on the office side, and so I we've taken that. DNA. We translated that we're bringing in some of the other services, but also would have happened is we started seeing metamorphosis in actually growing into the enterprise side as well and A lot of this has to do not only in the way that we're delivering, but it's the tools and resources that are available to whether it's a partner or to the end user themselves whether it's deep administrative tools that allow them to do things on their own or having a deep bench of support players on site or even through a partner community that can help them. So. What do you speak going forward, I. Sort of come through this hurry most curious of years. Now we can start to see a glimpse at the end of the year maybe into twenty twenty, one these happening in the market what do you see happening Roma? From a market perspective I think what we're starting to see and I think we'll continue is. Cloud has been out for ever I. Mean we've talked about who you know us in the industry we've been talking forever I think you're seeing the now the adoption. accelerating before now, realizing that wall cloud has been there they've never really tapped into it, and now they've learned how to and learn the need for it, and so I think this will continue I think the need in from a marketing stand from America standpoint is is define solutions that allow the most lex ability possible whether it's from a meant whether it's from a confessional engagement with a provider and having that flexibility. Or whether it's actually in the solution itself and being able to upright and moves off right whether with your phones or whether it's your network Cetera. So I think that the highly flexible work from anywhere environment is going to continue and cloud to enable it. So there, there's no doubt that we're going to see more growth in these areas and was gonna continue to innovate into drive a lot of that focus to make that easy. Now, from Chanel's perspective I. came over a year ago and so I just hit the earmark to really kind of accelerate, build our channel and diversify them, and I can tell you from the three that we talked about today my agent channel, my reseller channel private label I expect to see significant growth in all three areas you know when you look. At what a partner wants a partner comes in a variety of shapes and sizes right they come as independent telecom agents they come us or or consultants they come in as MSP's as far as they come in as an it var or they come in as your traditional PBS law. All of them have different ways they like to go to market some WANNA, flip the. Lead over the fence and they want you to engage in a cellar cell forming. Taliban. Them and and we absolutely can do that. Someone a control, the full process all the way from their branding, and that's five at label. And then of course, we've got the resellers really want more to drive to the value, add the VA portion of the right, and so you know traditional law for the last few years and I spent some time with a with a with a PBS factor for a couple of years you know the traditional war for years was being forced when it came to clouds to act as an agent, and that's not the value they bring right the value they bring being able to deliver some other services wrapped around. Its left any solution and you know we're we're we're taking our models trying to get back to where we're providing access for a partner to provide more of that value add, and so that's the reseller program we're revamping it. We're actually just GONNA be rolling it out and we do think that we're gonNA see significant growth in community but it's all about no matter what whether it's from the end user and by the way if we take care of the end user, we're taking care of our partners because our partners that we work with us and that we'd like to work with are the ones that absolutely care. About the customer experience money's great, we'd love money. We'd love to give it away to the right partners. But what we care more about is, what is the customer experience you know if you have a no contract option, we have within the office with constantly got earn that business. So we've got to make it easy right What would our partners? If we we know that we know this is simple. If we take care of the clients, we take care of the partners. Right if we deliver on our promise, they will be loyal to us. They will stay with us we'll continue to work with us. So I do see I do think that our channels over the next year to eighteen months are going to grow exponentially. And you see you know part of that growth coming from this concept that you guys have a business in a box. I, see a significant part of it coming that way I if you look at. You, look at some of our competitors in the space and I don't like the name names but a majority of them if you look at the recent hirings, if you look at the recent announcements, they're all trying to chase. The stack upward right. They want to go after bigger deals. Everybody loves bigger deal, but a majority of the business conducted in the United States is by the SMB. Business Reich, Main Street America you can walk down the. You can walk down the avenue whether it's at a strip mall or just like I'm here New York City I walked down I walked down the avenue as a hundreds and hundreds of small businesses that are often neglected. By. Some of our competitors because they don't see. They see the cost of acquisition as being too much. We've honed that process down. So I do think that some of the services some of the way we're going in that business in a box, the able to replace maybe some your connection and provide you internal networking and the foreign. Service was zero contracts I think that's a huge growth opportunity with at restaurants right now, restaurants have had to change. The way they operate you know in New, York City and we're gonNA use where I live in New York City it's outside dining, and that's a lot of places in the country, but you know what down Broadway, pop up tents pop up pop up kiosks how are they getting servicer? They need can activity, but they need phone service because they need stuff not only from the connected to power the. But they probably still WANNA take orders because if you WANNA make it easy to easy to engage with your customers right majority of our business in the. Face. When I think main street America they don't care as much about the video applications. They care about how they have a reliable and dependable voice solution that has a strong feature set that allows them to transact with their customer. And we've nailed that we have nailed that and I think that's the biggest part of our business set of grow. Conversely on the enterprise side. And the enterprise side I wanNA say is not about asides. Okay. It's not about you know we're not mean we'll chase thousand seat out between all day long absolutely. But that's when we say enterprise. It's not about that. It's about the it's about the mindset of a customer. A fifty user organization. You can't tell them. They don't need enterprise type feature sets or functionality. But when you go more upmarket and you go into a larger environment, that's where collaboration tools become more relevant because you WANNA have video conferencing with each other you wanna be able to have chat with your your coworker down he was might be working from home might be working from you know. From the park these days right I myself. I've worked for my car at times because New York City I can't live in a two bedroom apartment with two kids who are distance learning a wife I after work for my car sometimes. So this so I do think that we'll have we'll have significant growth in both are are are smaller SNB's segment but I think we'll. have in the enterprise side because we do have a lot of that that enterprise solutions that customers are looking at where we sing in where we do really well, there is when you have something that is highly you you need something that's highly customizable and the environment right that could be on the delivery mechanisms it could be on the feature sets and how they're delivered. You know there's some of our competitors that say if you get one package, all your users have to be that package that doesn't make sense. If you want the feature set for this one user to be more increased, everybody has to move up to that level or give everybody that level and then they downgrade the pricing right? We're able to give that mix and match. Able to get in there and home that stuff. So I I'm excited I mean I am really excited that I'm here now over year I'm starting to see the traction starting to see the engagement in the interest in. This company is doing internally the the the executive suite have been awesome to work with and they have a real keen. On keeping the DNA of where this company started on the residential side, and that is just making things simple and a strong user experience. and. If you think about them as maybe uniquely position given the fact that. The company began in the residence. And here we are basically having moved. Not, work, at home work from anywhere some of the anywhere is the resident. Yeah Right House irony. So you know you you you in other words you you know what you speak as a company you did. You began life the DNA of the company was. You know and and if I remember correctly, one of the things that I learned in previous podcasts was that in perfecting some of the problems and overcoming some of the hurdles that happened at the residents send those lessons were applied to the commercials. That was exactly right. Right and you understand the. We understand the challenges of of bandwidth from the home environment especially when shared bandwidth. I I'm not sure if I covered this early I think I may have but you know some of our some of our teams have actually been using our connect. From their home environment because of that shared bandwidth that they had that was really designed for residential but you know with all the kids at home distance learning when they're not when they're not learning what are they doing 'cause I can't go anywhere and do anything. They'd probably playing video games right and so we've actually seen some of our own employees have had. Connected home. So they could segment that traffic keep a shepherd that's the versatility you know as a number of other companies in the field whom as a publicly traded company and without getting into all sorts of details you know he just seems that the market is applauded the company's performance especially over the course of the past year and I'm wondering whether you know. It's connected to people seeing whom in the long run and and seeing the impact of how these different products you've described if played out. Yeah I think I think there's a I think there's four relation there doug. Always. Possible. Of course we. Publication. So we're not cussing prices and so on. We're not discussing what we think will happen in the future with anybody star price but I it just as a reporter I've kind of saying it's interesting that if investors are betting on Uma, than it, it you know it says something of the company as far as maybe being a place to be a parker, a channel partner or another kind of partners you mentioned three different types. It's definitely vote of confidence. Well I WANNA. Thank you for joining me today. It's been very interesting very interesting overview of what's happening to do especially with regard to products and with the Channel Program and how Ho- How those two have interacted to create a new experiences for and users we're. Can we learn more about him? Well obviously, there's a website dot COM There's a myriad of information there but we also have we also have some partner sites. We can go on about some of the programs US partner, dot dot, com and as well. Anybody's free at any time to. Shoot me an email they're looking for anything specific or any any guide into the direction always available or any of my channel managers. Well we'll be looking forward to this in the future, but for now, thank you very much. Thank you very much appreciate the time and the opportunity.

partner New York City United States Steve Biko publisher Taliban America SNB Chanel York City reporter MSP executive Uma
Larry Magid: Passwords Are Getting Phased Out

Tech Reports by Larry Magid

02:32 min | 2 years ago

Larry Magid: Passwords Are Getting Phased Out

"The president's day sale mattress firm is Ben extended. It's your last chance to take a free adjustable base with your qualifying Nashes purchase up to a six hundred ninety nine dollars value, absolutely free. See what customers are reading about like record in Maryland who loved the value. She got with the just will base and the savings. Don't stop there. Save up to five hundred dollars on mattresses throughout the store these deals and Tuesday. Your budget stretches further at mattress firm. Restrictions apply. Not participating locations only. For offer details. Visit matches firm dot com slash sale. Sem computer security experts have long been calling passwords an outdated technology. Well, we could now be one step closer to phasing them out. Larry how? So the something called the worldwide web could force him and the Fido alliance and Fido stands for fast density, online have officially adopted this notion of alternative ways to Kate yourself. And that includes biometrics whether that's a fingerprint or retina or facial recognition. However it works. It also. Includes these little kief, you may have heard of a company called you Biko, and I bleed in Palo Alto that makes it USB key both for phone and a computer that can that can affect a Kate you and other ways of logging in without having to type in the passwords, and we've talked a lot about the problem with passwords, they they're broken. They've been broken for a long time. And it's time we find an alternative, what do you make of the recommendations? Well, I agree with the recommendations. I think you know, it's gonna take a long time before we're going to totally move away from passwords, but I think anybody who can experience other ways to Kate should try it, for example on my my Android phone. I can use my fingerprint not only to log into the phone but increasingly app, they're allowing me to use my fingerprint to open up the app. So if I want to for example, open my Bank account, I can do it with my fingerprint instead of having to type my password, iphones, depending upon the model may fingerprint they may face recognition, but a similar concept. So not only. Opening up the phone, but also being able to launch apps, and that means that eventually we could do away with with password. So it can't come soon enough because I can never remember my passwords I love being able to open with my face on apple. So that's great. How voice recognition voice recognition is. Also there you know, when I call my stock fidelity, which handles my investment account. They Athena Kate me based on my voice. It just blows me away that I don't have to give them any other information because their their computer to the that flurry that's pretty cool too.

Kate Maryland president Nashes Ben Larry Palo Alto Fido Biko apple six hundred ninety nine dollar five hundred dollars
FINANCE - The Mind of an Entrepreneur with Wayne Veldsman

Suburban Folk

50:23 min | Last month

FINANCE - The Mind of an Entrepreneur with Wayne Veldsman

"Today's podcast is presented by padro. Pod go is the easiest way for you to monetize your podcast. Providing podcasters a flat rate for ad space. So you always know how much you get. When you include an ad from pago. I recently joined as a member and you can to apply today to become a member immediately be connected with advertisers that fit your audience. That's pago dot co at p. o. d. g. o. Dot co when you become a member enter suburban folk in the podcast that you heard about them. Today's episode is also presented by sweat connected. Sweat connected is a transformative way to work out. Sweat connected has a mission to help you feel your best. Each expert instructor brings their signature method directly to you wherever you are in the world via zoom. When you take a sweat connected class you were able to interact with your instructor and the other participants in the class just like you would a live studio experience. Whether you have been a group fitness participant for years or newer you will feel at home with sweat connected sweat. Connected is exclusively offering our listeners. Fifty percent off their first class by going to sweat connected dot com and using the code. Pod that's pod p. o. d. at sweat connected dot com for fifty percent off your first class sweat connected for all levels all ages all sizes and all humans. We're also brought to you by purple carat. Purple carrot is the plant based subscription meal. Kit that makes it easy to cook irresistible meals fuel your body each week. Choose from an expansive and delicious menu of dinners lunches breakfasts snacks. Every box is an opportunity to learn and experience something new with easy recipes and fresh pre proportioned ingredients no shopping no food waste. Just globally inspired restaurant quality. Plant based meals get thirty dollars off your first box by going to purple carrots dot com and entering the code pod. Go thirty at checkout today. That's pod go thirty and thirty dollars off your first purple carrots box purple carrots the easiest way to eat more plants and finally i want to tell you about you bacau you. Because that's new world standards for simple secure log. In preventing unauthorized access to computers servers and internet accounts the yuba key from you bacau is a physical security key using two factor authentication to protect your accounts as more of continue to work from home. It is more important than ever to protect your secure information. So what can you do to protect your accounts. You biko is offering our listeners. Ten dollars off your next purchase of one hundred dollars or more using the code pod at yuko dot com. That's code pod at you because dot com say hello to you becky and goodbye to account takeovers. Health parenting finance travel and home improvement. This is the suburban podcast. Welcome to the suburban four podcast. I'm greg reuter timer your host today. We're going to talk about the life of an entrepreneur but we're also going to see that mindset of giving and seven others will help you grow not only in your career but also professionally. My guest is wayne bell's men he is the host of the journey to legacy podcast. He's also the president and co founder of bel dot consulting. He's an accomplished business. Growth strategist success coach and entrepreneur. He specializes in helping. Entrepreneurial minded individuals grow their mindsets and their income wayne actively works with entrepreneurs and businesses. Who are looking to take massive action and create drastic change in their lives. Thanks for joining me today. A little background for the audience. I had the pleasure of being on your show and off air. I think we really. We're seeing eye to eye in entrepreneur journey compared to a life balance. So i have a feeling. That's where we're going to go. And i'm really interested in your unique story. So do you want to go ahead and kick us off with your background in being an entrepreneur. And how that's gotten to you to where you are now in your perspectives. Deathly greg. thanks man. I'm i'm so excited. Obviously after our interview on my show we just saw so. I ida i on so many different things in. So it's an absolute pleasure to be here be able to share some time again so thanks man but a. Yeah a little bit about my background. So i originally from south africa. We moved to the united states rows just about six years old. My parents immigrated me my two siblings and enforce themselves here. Grandma's my life in virginia. And i think a big piece of wearing him today comes from sort of that immigrant. Lifestyle right hard work and determination were just so ingrained into me now. My parents both worked multiple jobs. Worked nights now did really everything they needed to do to almost create that that quote unquote american dream in. So that's really where it all started. When sort of the classic route through school had tons and tons of part-time jobs went to college. Got a degree. In communications public relations and brand management and actually Started my first entrepreneurial project. That's when i say. The journey towards entrepreneurship really started had the opportunity to launch an online clothing brand. And so we weren't like a brick and mortar shop we eventually did get into a few brick and mortars launched a brand developed to the websites are running blog started teaching myself online advertising. And really that's where almost the journey towards where i am. Now really specializing in digital archiving. Space really started teaching myself everything anything to try and grow this online clothing brands but from there had some other projects. Nina buddy we sold hover. Boards wheel hover self-balancing hover boards when they were really popular. We we've got a brand for that. Sold those for awhile man. There's been a bunch of projects since then. But where i landed today. I'm now in denver colorado specializing in helping small business owners. But i really like to say is helping. Entrepreneurial minded individuals to a lot of times turn passions into prophet really teaching them how to launch a business in the online space. Or how to transition what they're currently doing to online get more eyeballs in front of their brand and actually more sales more purchases for whether they're selling a product or a service. Oh i guess that really really specializing in more of that. Coaching teaching and consulting space than anything else right now. There are so many things that i want to get to in what you just had so i'm going to pace myself. Maybe just with the last thing you mentioned with twenty twenty. Gosh what a timely perspective as far as people using their passions and either making it to where it's available to more people via online like about in really for example. I just had a conversation yesterday with a financial advisor and we were comparing people with their day job and what it's very hard for people to change their mindset to think that that is not necessarily as safe as you think it is and then of course maybe going to diversifying. You were into building your own businesses. Doing these things right out of the gate. Do you have any thoughts about people's perspective. Who may be hesitant to go from the quote safety of their day job into some of these other ventures what a great question interesting because obviously now with cove it. I think that is the easiest example to show people how unsafe they are with their day. Jobs right. this crazy thing happened in the world and let's hope it doesn't happen again you ever for a long long time but the point of the matter being is something happened. That was outside of your control but all of a sudden so many thousands and thousands not millions of people author jobs. They were stranded. They had no in common. Thank goodness you know. Some governments of course in the us and across the world are providing relief to people but evatt in itself doesn't show you actually how unsafe or or insecure your day to day job is no. There's not much else That i can really say it's gonna prove it to you. But one thing that i do always recommend people that are per your questions sort of maybe there on that edge or they're normally just even stuck in net their corporate job or just working for the man in general you know i always recommend people to just start slowly. Start right out of school. I had one job data door to door sales. It was business to business. What i call the canvassing century they gave me zip code instead. Go walk into every single business. You'll find out who's inside once you get in there. I was trying to sell them. Telephones services actually but after that it sort of when i launched entrepreneurship hated the job at saw. I quit actually decided to drive for uber in list while i was launching a and it was such an amazing opportunity but almost along the same lines like i went to uber. Lift to be able to. Give me a little bit of money while i starting. I recommend everybody else. That sort of questioning. Should i go into entrepreneurship to slowly. Start while you're in your day job you know. Spend the hours outside of the job whether it's at night on the weekends you have time. I promise you have time to start using it. Wisely starts slowly start figuring out what is my passion. Startling research read blogs watch. Videos are teaching yourselves. The skills necessary Get going right. I think there's some types of people who really do thrive if they jump wholeheartedly into something meaning quit their job. And then you know. They have to succeed entrepreneurship or the half to succeed in whatever the project is doing because you know. They don't starve on money. But i think for the majority of people start slow test. The waters right. Entrepreneurship isn't for everybody. There's a lot more behind the scenes and you expect so. Yeah i think that's sort of the way to go about. It is starts low and then end of day. That's really what's gonna build security in your life by taking full control full responsibility so that if something like kovin happens again in the future right. Nobody's there to fire you. Nobody's there to furlough you. You are in full control over yourself your business your income. That's a good point something. I was going to mention comparing to your day job if you think of it from climbing the corporate ladder for whatever position. You're in relatively speaking. There is some sort of income ceiling now. Of course you could get promoted to the next level and you have that there but that doesn't exist in the world of creating your own side hustle or business which i think would be attractive to most people another counter to whether or not somebody thinks. They're an entrepreneur or not or if it is for them. I would use myself a little bit as an example that i never really used that term much at all but then when i started to see the behaviors that i have in getting into different things and creating small little side ventures with it. Wow that really is being an entrepreneur. I just didn't really ever figure out that. That was a specific passive. I think other people may be in that same boat. They may have a personality that it they just haven't defined it in that way so don't let the definition of the term. Be the thing that makes you scared to jump and see where it goes just to touch real quick. The word entrepreneurship. I even or being an entrepreneur. I still to this day. Like i'm not in love with the term because people made it out to be this huge thing right. It's like i don't know why it seems so either. Daunting or to some people say. It almost seems embarrassing term of entrepreneurship so yet get throw that word out the window right. Think of it more. If it's easy for you as a side hustle start. A sinus will just sell on the back of your closet. Congratulations now. You're an entrepreneur. Now you're starting to sign hustle because you're starting to simply just make money for yourself. I'm theorizing that. I wonder if it's shark tank. That did that to people because you now are equating. Millionaires billionaires with what it takes or. That's the only end goal for being an entrepreneur which to your point is not it at all but i'll use like the world of music. I remember growing up. You never wanted to say. Hey i want to be a rockstar. But somebody could wave a magic wand. That's probably what they were looking for. But if you really press him further and say if you could make a decent living being a musician would you do that. We'll all those people would probably still say. Yes so that may be as where some of that gap comes in between the two one other thing i wanna go back to another Similarity we have is communications. Any theories on is it communications people that like to dabble a bunch of stuff. Or how did you go from that into all the different areas and in start to make your way towards business during school during college. Being a communication major people saw it adds at least my school. It was sort of the easy major to take. It was not not taking the easy way out but some people saw it as a joke by now like so on the side of like. Hey jokes on you because the fact of the matter being if you can talk to someone appropriately if you can express ideas and convey ideas so that people understand it and people feel comfortable you can do anything in this world. You absolutely anything. Yeah you know there's still som- position some careers that you have to have a certain degree for by doctors have to go certain certain direction right as long as you can instill confidence in someone that you can do a specific job and of course you know you have to learn the skills but doesn't mean you have to have a degree in it then menu do anything in the entire world into being a communications major having communications degree. Yeah i think that does directly translate a lot of times into entrepreneurship. Where lease like you said sort of dabbling in a lot of different things because almost talk away into it or at least we can talk ourselves into thinking. It's a good idea emphasis on that word talk. I would agree with you that if nothing else from my communications major having to be able to speak effectively in in certain forums certainly translated into different areas. And especially when you're stretching yourself out of your comfort zone. Your example of going door to door is well taken that it takes a special personality to do that for more than like a day. When you go into these different things that's part of it Of course you. And i have spent a lot of time talking about networking and how that is essential in anything that you're doing so maybe that is sort of some of that foundation. That comes from the communications majors. And i totally agree with you. Yes i also was looked at like i just took the easy way through college. And then what we're doing for for whatever reason but actually let's stick on that topic. What is your perspective on networking and how you used it in your journey now working. Everything is it's totally innocent. Most cliche thing everybody says it all the time. But it's totally who you know. Not what you know. It's becoming more in more real every day. Nice sorta thing is because of the internet. I started off with my introduction talking about my first business being this online clothing company right. We were selling clothing. That was branded for colleges colours. But he wasn't using their names or their logos was sort of idea the concept everything that i did for that company everything i did for that brand that business. I learned online. I didn't learn any of it in college in any of it with my communication degree. Obviously i guess you know being able to read and being able to to call. People have effectively speak to them. It's a learning thing online. But i think that's really what goes to y. Networking is so important. Because if you can meet people that are either in positions that you wanna see yourself in the future right. It can start to teach you concert. Meant you how to get there or if you just network enough that no you know someone who works at google and you want to work at google. Guess what that's going to bring so so much value in wait to the table when they're looking at applications or when they're interviewing people you having somebody on the inside that's vouching for you can mean so much more than an extra internship or extra experience on that resume. Yes having a contact in a company that you are interested in going to. I think most people have now had the experience with the software. That's looking for certain key words and so on in this guessing game that goes on with what you put in your resume to get by that. Automated gatekeeper will absolutely. I've found the most effective way to get around. That is just what you described of contacting a person within that company asking if they know who the hiring manager is or if they know anybody in hr even before you press apply for that is absolutely huge and again just to also be clear that shows that networking is not just again in the world of being an entrepreneur. You almost took network networking just now to a different level than i was thinking. Simply because you said if you're applying for a job no even before you hit the apply but call in talk to the hr manager or say or simply start asking questions a who's in charge of his position. This is who i am. Jaunt introduce myself. You're almost at that point. And i don't want to negatively almost forcibly networking which is a huge deposit. Is pretty amazing thing that anybody can do that by simply calling introducing yourself. Starting the conversation. That's not that's going to help you to get ahead for whatever it. Is that job that you applied for and so just wanted to point that out. I thought it was super interesting again. I think just even from the standpoint of some of skills we're talking about even if people are still skeptical about taking that first step. These are skills that will help in your day-today career. Whatever that happens to be so it's certainly worth getting over whatever fear you may have in the world of networking and talking to people that you don't know. I think that also transitions well into your journey about. Diy learning those skills that you were talking about reading finding information online emphasis. I'm sure on how much information is free. And affordable talk a little bit about what your philosophy has been in amassing skills and then how you turn them around to be an advantage. In your work life it's sort of multidimensional have to say ryan. I'll start out with the whole around what i've been talking about. So far right the internet's out there. All information is out there. I company read blogs. Watch youtube videos. That's we did everything second project. Same thing read blogs watched youtube videos. Every time i have a question about. How do i do something. Google it as wearing amazing amazing time in his world in the universe just humanity. I guess that all information at our fingertips now get so stunned. When i hear someone saying the don't know how to do something or even something simple like in a in a software right if you're using some sort of program online using social media right no doubt there's people out there that say stuff like i don't know how to update the cover photo on my facebook profile and so it's just blank or it's still very first one that my kid helped me put up. Will you know my next question is have you googled it. Have you tried to find that information because house august nine times out of ten. It's out there but like men greg. It's almost ten times out of ten like that. Information is already out there. Unless you're developing something brand new or two totally new concept a new business new programs that just came out ten ten times information's out there and so don't be afraid to searching for it the teach yourself you can learn almost anything everything out there for free so definitely if you have that. Excuse in your mind. I don't have the finances medicine to start a company or i can't afford higher education. Linda stop you start googling. Start asking questions information out there now. Partout in the beginning that sorta my answers will multifaceted. Here is because i a huge huge huge believer now in actually buying courses right education so important not think it's funny because the concept of college and the importance of it i think is starting to transition away or at least my opinion is that not. Everybody needs to go to college. But i am. Such a huge proponent of education right because it's all out there but so now instead of spending countless hours you know searching google reading blog posts watching youtube videos. Every time i have a question takes a very very long time right because you answer one question you pop back what you're working on. You know successfully complete died in your. Yeah awesome you keep moving and all of sudden you have another question so then again gotta go. Searching gusts are reading watching so he can answer nigga back the really long process. So i'm a huge proponent of actually buying courses or paying for coaching or mentorship can fast forward that process. They already know exactly the questions that you're going to be asking. And they know the order that you're going to be asking him in that order operations and so if you can pay have all the information sort of collect data in one spot so worth it can really really fast forward everything for you. So whether it's getting free information out there or whether it's paying for information online it's all at the tip of our fingers so never think to yourself. You don't know how to do something and let it stop you because you can always go out and find information and learn it the phrase that i use in this realm is the chances of you having a problem that somebody else hasn't already had unsolved is pretty slim. That goes to that nine out of ten. Maybe even ten out of ten unless right. You're trying to build some crazy tech thing that nobody's ever even thought of before in. That's probably not what you're wanting to start. Let's say just anyway. So it is definitely out there and i always have to tell myself because i am very cheap. Maybe i'll use the nice word and say frugal. It is a good point that you make about spending a little bit of money at least on classes things like that and again in this world. It's almost would be self-defeating not to because chances are a person you're getting. That information from is probably self-employed. Doing the things that you're looking to do. And if you're saying by avoiding paying for it. I e it doesn't have value then you're already basically saying that what you're trying to do will inherently not have value village. That's a big mindset problem. That people might have Yeah i think absolutely again admittedly. I'm kind of that way. I'm sort of wired to be skeptical of almost any financial transaction. And so i have to be very mindful of it and i think other people probably are as well but to your point. You can probably avoid some mistakes. That may actually cost you money. Depending on what you're doing or you may be buying yourself time in not making mistakes after i quit that first business to business sales job driving for uber driving for lift. I'm slowly but surely decided. I wanna launch this online marketing agency. You know teaching myself everything online as going. I'm starting to learn how to ron facebook and google ads and about blogging. Seo and all these technical things taking a long time. I stumbled upon this ad on facebook by was essentially about this guy. Who did everything that i was doing. He realized that the digital marketing space was going to be super lucrative. So he taught himself. As for god's he taught himself online marketing and sales funnels. And you know x y z later. He's buying himself a jaguar and he's living in a new house in florida. Like all these amazing things i was like. Wow and so and of this ad essentially prompts you to apply to speak with them in potentially work with them. I so i did long story short. I ended up buying a program. New was five thousand dollars. I was just out of college. Even guy five thousand dollars in the bank not a chance not a chance i was in the negatives thirty forty thousand dollars But anyways i bought this program for five thousand dollars because of this reason right. The whole question of frugality and were you just said the reason why i'm telling the story is that maybe there's going to be a mistake. You make it's gonna cost you money or would they explain to me was the term is now saving my mind but essentially it's by not moving fast enough or by moving slower. You're losing money. The concept essentially this if he can take you a year to start making ten thousand dollars a month right sounds pretty great but if i can fast forward that in only have it take you six months to start making ten thousand dollars a month. If i charge you ten thousand dollars for that knowledge. Guess what. Now you're gonna actually profit sixty thousand dollars right because it just took you now six months to learn it and now you're making ten thousand dollars a month so for the rest of at six months ten thousand ten thousand ten thousand ten thousand ten thousand to sixty thousand dollars versus if you take a year by yourself at sixty thousand dollars or you missed out on because he could have fast forwarded. That process started making that money earlier. And so although you paid ten thousand dollars for the program. I hope. i'm not confusing anybody with these numbers. Let's you pay ten thousand dollars for the program you'll learn it's six months earlier so then you actually do profit fifty thousand dollars versus taking the full year to lennart yourself fifty thousand dollars or you didn't have so Does is an interesting concept. No one day sorted told that to me about hey yes you can learn everything yourself online. Yes the information is out there but by buying our program you can fast forward it and start making that money. That's what sold me in. That actually pushed me all to where i am today in some super super grateful for that salesman who actually helped me to make that decision. Complicating that consideration. So i won't try and do any math with it but depending on the area that you're focused on there might also be more money to be gained by getting out of the gate earlier from a competition standpoint or something that is less known. Let's say yeah years ago when maybe not everybody did have as much visibility to things like google or facebook algorithm stuff like that or just. What's they should be doing for social media. Well there's a lot more of those people now so Less competition also could potentially equal more revenue so true. Yeah very true to take with what they call it early. Movers advantage exactly so for people that are hearing this conversation and say still saying. I don't have time for this and i i definitely have said on the show many many times that when. You hear entrepreneur psychic gig all of these things. There are definitely people that are in it that talk about the late night. The missing out on other activities things like that and again. That was our actually off air conversation. That was very interesting to me. And i think fits a lot of discussions that that we've had on the show talk about how your perspective was of grinding right out of school in doing these things. And then ultimately where you're at with coaching. Probably going through a lot of these concepts with your clients and that shifted at all that you can tell people. You don't have to kiss your family goodbye when you start one of these kinds of adventures. When i graduated tool reid went to the job in the sales gig was it was. It was obsolete killer right it was. We were at the office. I think we were supposed to get there at six thirty in the morning super early we started going through sales trainings in like you know team building activities all this stuff. Then by eight o'clock were out the door. Some people are driving like an hour to get to their zip kozo occasion work in the entire day. We're hitting fifty forty to fifty day so then you know six o'clock seven o'clock rolls around that's when we head back to the office and the whole mantra was if you haven't made a sale don't come back to the office. Stay out until until you make a sale and then go directly home and if you didn't make five sales during the week thousand number you're literally shooting to make a singular sale a day. You didn't make five sales during the week york saturday. Same thing huge long day. Saturday men to grind absolutely sucked. It was terrible. And so then. When i left the atmosphere and entrepreneurship right i had the classic mentality of most people of i gotta grind twenty four seven. Three sixty five right just came out of this sales position where that's what they taught me now and then everything i was seeing online on social media was teaching me. If you want to be an entrepreneur you gotta work all day every day. Do nothing else spend. No time with your friends. No time with your family. Don't even consider having hobbies. You know it was ridiculous. Until i actually launched my podcast right. When i launched like start in entrepreneurship i was like this. Is something easy. I can do and i named podcast. Work grind hustle. Because had this mentality. That i had to work in grind in hustle. Twenty four seven three sixty five to able to achieve my dreams. I guess what guys it's not possible to do. We've all heard of burnout. Need is a very very real thing. When you're in the beginning of entrepreneurship in the beginning of launching business. Should you work a ton. Yes are you sometimes going to have to put in late nights because you have a deadline or you told a potential client. You would send them a proposal. Yeah you're gonna have to put into nights. But it's not sustainable. If you try to do it just that work just that work ethic day in day out for forever. She's not gonna happen writing an honest. The biggest thing where this leads to the conversation really around happiness so for everybody out there. Who's not familiar. Gary v Sort of a lifelong launch for nor he owns a big digital marketing agency. Out of new york city. He works with clients like coca cola. Google ibm these fortune. Fifty four hundred companies and it seems that all he does is work. But i say it seems that way and it seems that he's just preaching hustle hustle hustle hustle work work work work but ended the day. He's talking about happiness because he gives this example a lot of times whereas if you could run a flower shop and you love flowers right love flowers. Run this flower shop and make thirty thousand dollars a year. Forty thousand dollars a year. Whatever it is you know. Your expenses aren't high in your living comfortably in your living life. How you want on your own terms in your happy. That is so much more important than trying to work. Twenty four seven making yourself unhappy to make three hundred thousand dollars a year. That's what i started to realize. That's where my mind My mindset shifted was from trying to you know have this theoretical be a billionaire which you know in the back of my mind still think of that would be pretty sweet but i started realizing i need to shoot for happiness. I started getting away more of a balance. I started making sure that i was sleeping. Eight hours every single night. We'll get into the importance of sleep but man if you're not getting enough sleep you're hurting yourself. During the day. I was leaving. I was spending time with my family. I got a new gym membership. She signed up for a little soccer league in my town slowly but surely as i was doing those things business funny enough started doing better and better. I think it's because my mentality was doing better and better and better so i highly believe that we have to have more of a quote unquote balance. It can work life balance you know. There is a thing as corrigo balance. Because that means you have to be exactly the same but you do have to spend time on yourself you do have to spend time on your happiness on your mentality notch just working or else. You're not going to be able to do the things necessary in your actual work in. Selam end of story really. I switched to that podcast from being called work grind hustle to being called journey to legacy which is way more about the stories about the journey. Not just working grinding hustling every day. Because i know there's so much more goes into it. We've had a number of guests on the show. That is a lot of the points that you're making here a couple interesting stats that. I've learned from some other guests one around that pursuing fill in the blank amount. You think you need to be making and also combined with the. I'm going to be with a company for this long and i'm going to retire at sixty five and then there's my retirement was told by guest that he was able to get a study from boeing. And i'm gonna forget the other company but both were nearly identical that they were figuring out their pension costs and for the people that actually work till sixty five their average life expectancy afterward was eighteen months. That's it and so. Of course his point was again. Do what makes you happy. And it's not what you think. It is again working for other people things like that and then to your point of the importance of sleep absolutely. My phrase is always if whatever you're doing affects your health. That is the pure definition of something not being worth it and whether it's sleep like you mentioned or you're eating crazy amounts. We're all pretty much working from home now and it is just evil to have this terrible stuff in your pantry that you could just walk right over to at least in the office. You're limited to whatever you can put in your car and put in the refrigerator for the day so you know you you gotta stop those things. And then the other point that you're making as far as happiness is concerned and retirement. I've definitely heard people say get. I'm dave ramsey guy. Whenever he talks about retirement he definitely mentions if somebody loses purpose in meaning in their life. Even if you get to retirement age and you can't do the things that you were doing before you still need to find something that gives you purpose in meeting other in other words. You're not gonna just sit on the couch all the time. Because i've got the money to do so that's actually another recipe for potentially failing health because your usefulness just goes out the window which comes back to what you're saying find something that makes you happy and then i've kind of been hard convinced and i'm still a little bit on the fence about the concept of work life balance and then when people will say. Oh there's no such thing 'cause you basically have the to overlap. I think maybe that can be the case. From the standpoint of having kids in that kind of thing is where i get real defensive about my time with kids in particular and what i've got going on but i think a lot of what you're talking about hits those other concepts that life is short and there are other things to be done. One other point. That i'll hit on in your example of getting out and joining a soccer league. Something that i realized when i started to reach out for financial coaching. And letting people know that. That's something that i'm doing is as a now couple year long remote worker. I've kind of gotten disconnected from my local community. Because i'm only speaking to people that are out there in digital land and it is satisfying. Maybe that's where the world's can come together that you're able to interact with the people in your community and hey even be offering them something that if you believe in it can make your community better. I think that is definitely something to be considered so important. That's something every needs to be aware of it because more and more and more everybody's digital right we're talking to people not just in a different state. We're talking to people in different countries all across the world so there needs to be purposeful. you know. Focus on your community in making sure that you touch base with people actually help to get back role to talk to me a little bit more about coming from south africa in if you mentioned what age you were then in. Do you think that informs your perspective compared to somebody that was born in never left america. We moved in nineteen ninety nine when we moved to the us in so i was born in ninety three so arrow facto some easy math six years old when we got here so i didn't remember a lot about south africa from what i was too young rights growing up in the. Us funny enough. I think my perspective was essentially almost the same as someone who was born here right. A big big differentiating factor four. When i was growing up was the work ethic guys off my parents right. I knew obviously that were first. Generation immigrants You know. I didn't necessarily understand that everybody else's parents didn't work the same way minded or they didn't have multiple jobs or after work through the night. I didn't understand that for a long time. But that really shifted my perspective really on everything of how hard we need to work in. My parents has such a focus on family. It was craziness like doing everything for of course somewhat for themselves but really for their kids for me and my two siblings. They were striving for happiness. And i saw them multiple times literally breaking down in tears because finances were so hard but after that you know it was once again it was happiness because we were all together because we were safe because we had a a great life year. So that's a big thing that shifted my perspective role but then actually. When i was a junior in college my third year in college i got the opportunity to actually go back in. Live insists south africa for six months. So i i decided to take off a semester. Because of because of networking in connections was able to find a job in south africa. I worked nece amazing advertising agency. They actually had the the penthouse of the skyscraper in the city where people don't realize that south africa has developed country. There's bunches cities skyscrapers all good stuff. But i was in cape town and so it was like the penthouse of new skyscraper. It was totally glass. The walls on two sides of the office massive place on one of the walls looked out over. The ocean in the other wall looked out over this huge mountain range. Those unbelievable really really amazing time so blessed but the reason why. I say that. I spent these six months. There is because i started meeting people right. Started meeting people my own age talking to them. Then it's really when it hit me this crazy advantage that have being in the. Us is crazy opportunity that had for most of my life being us. Because when i met people. I told him where i was from. There is so many of them would almost just say they would glass over. Because that's not the right word. They widen new. Look at me with sheer like all in jealousy. Almost anything all my god. Your from america. What is it like it was just this this thing that we had so much more opportunity here. And that's what started making me realize actually. Wow like i need to be so much more thankful for what i have a navy so much more grateful for how i've grown up in still growing up where i live because everybody doesn't have those opportunities right when i was boy through six years old. I didn't really learn that much of it. Learned a lot from my parents mentality in from who. They are really know those six months that i spent. That's what made me realize the big difference that other third world countries or developing countries. They don't really experience compared to people here in the us. I think that is an excellent sentiment in hopefully should help develop. Somebody's overall perspective. Looping this back to problem solving in the grand scheme figuring out how to best put your social media together compared to people that have while frankly real problems should make you feel okay about what you're having to solve in particular day. I suggest that everybody definitely get get abroad. Go visit other cultures. See what's going on because it's going to give you a perspective that you've never had before in your entire life right being born in another country. I didn't even really have that perspective. Until i spent some time as an adult in in another country. And so i think it's a super important things that people can start to realize. Maybe my problems aren't actually. That bad. totally agree. I try to emphasize that on the show. Especially when we have travel episodes that i think it is so worthwhile so worth the cost compared to amassing stuff in that whole sort of consumer driven et cetera et cetera. Well before we end you wanna go ahead and give folks contact information where they can find you on social media any events promotions. You'd also like to let people know about as far as people wanting to reach out. I am every waiter in anywhere he might looking for me so wayne. Vel visit men v. e. d. david s. m. a. n. Check now popping into google. I'm all over the place. Please feel free to reach out a facebook in link in or where. I'm most prevalent. Where i spend most of my time where most of my content outs I said if you just google me should find it pretty easily. No doubt about it and then if anybody wants to sort of get involved a great great way other than just simply greeting out start. Networking start connecting highly highly. Asked people to ask me questions just to reach out. Shoot a message. Never be afraid to reach out to another human being like his end of day. We are all humans often reaching out wanting a new coaching program. And i'm gonna be super super reasonably priced has launched gaddafi working with another business coach. Decide exactly the pricing but can be five bucks or ten bucks. A month focused all around business and personal growth in so you can find that either by going to wayne veldman dot com or val dot consulting. That is my firm and either of those places. You'll be able to find the coaching program. So if you guys need help with growing a business online or growing your mentality sleek a little light of happiness in fulfilment. That's what i'm here for so never hesitate to reach out perfect. And of course i'll put all of those links into the show notes to make it easy for folks to find you wayne. I really appreciate you taking the time. Today we'll be in touch. We'll be in touch if you enjoyed this episode. Please consider giving us a five star review on apple podcasts. You can also subscribe on apple spotify or all other major podcasting applications to be notified of our latest episode. You can also join our conversation at suburban folk dot com or any social media site including facebook twitter and instagram at the handle suburban folk. Thanks for listening.

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42: Simplify Your Life

Mindset for Life

15:24 min | 5 months ago

42: Simplify Your Life

"Welcome to the mindset for life podcast. This is Bethanie your coach from Dr B Coach. Com, coaching with power, purpose, and practical tools to help you show up with confidence. Welcome to the PODCAST. Thank you for joining me today. I'm very excited to speak with you about simplifying. I don't know how much you have heard about the minimalism movement, but minimalism is this idea that we don't really need all that we have stuffed our lives full of. For example, maybe we have a lot of furniture, or a lot of dishes, or a lot of clutter. Junk and things in our house. Maybe we drive around in a car that has all kinds of things in it that don't really need to be there. Or, maybe we put all kinds of activities into our lives. So, there is no time to slow down to deeply connect with our loved ones. maybe <span _ngcontent-asw-c24="" class="transcript-word ng-star-inserted" id="64.05">And</span><span _ngcontent-asw-c24="" class="transcript-word ng-star-inserted" id="64.44">maybe</span>we don't have a lot of time to reflect. So this podcast is all about simplifying. I'm going to talk with you about current events in terms of COVID-19 pandemic being a time when we 've all kind of talked about slowing down. It's been forced upon us, whether it's mentally, physically, or both. Maybe we had to stay home. Maybe we weren't able to go places. I've mentioned this on a couple of podcasts months ago. I had so many plans for this year and they all revolved around events I was going to go to. There was a coaching workshop in Arizona I was going to go to in April. Maybe it was March. There was a concert in my town that I got some good, cheap tickets to for March. It was going to be held about a week after the pandemic was declared, and we were all asked to stay home. And, the concert was canceled. I did have a major international trip that I was going to take . It was a conference presentation I was going to make and that was canceled. So much, right? But each of those things, as lovely as they were, and as important as they might have been to me at the time, honestly they were just a lot of " stuff." And in this period, I myself have experienced such beauty in my life. Simplicity. Time to put good into the world. Time to really connect with my family members. Normally, I visit my mother and sister in a given year ( because we live a couple of states apart), normally I see them two, maybe three times a year. I think we've all seen each other four or five times so far this year. There was one week when I just went to my sister's and stayed for a whole week, because she was moving. She needed help, and we really had a chance to reconnect nicely, in grand this " slowdown" that has occurred. There are many opportunities to simplify. What comes up for you? What stands out in your life that you would like to change? Maybe, you want a lot less of it. Maybe you've been putting up with something. Tolerating it. And now, you realize that you just don't need that in your life anymore. So. What's a good way to letgo of those things ? One thing that I would suggest is thinking about what actually brings you joy, happiness, and satisfaction. What are your top go-to areas, that you really want to make sure are part of your life? Start there. And, what do you need in your life? For example, if you need an income and you need a job, and you have a job right now but you don't really like that job, it's possible that you can't let the job go just yet. But, maybe there are things you can negotiate in that job. Maybe there are ways to increase the areas of the job that do attract you. It may be to reduce the things that add more stress. Another thing I would like to suggest is letting go of certain expectations. There's this idea that when we have unmet expectations, we experience resentment, disappointment, or fear, anger. All kinds of what we think of as negative feelings. Many of these negative feelings actually come from unmet expectations. And in many parts of our lives, unmet expectations only happen because we haven't actually communicated up of front what our expectations really are . Or, we did not make the preparations needed to make something happen. So, in terms of a relationship, like if you're thinking about a parent- child relationship (m other- son, father-s on, mother- daughter, father- daughter), that kind of relationship. If you have some expectations of your child, and you don't really articulate what should be done by when, and by whom, to get a commitment from the child. Chances are, you're going to have some unmet expectations. And, you are going to feel resentment, or disappointment, or maybe even frustration. Anger. Things like that are going to happen. There's almost one hundred percent chance of that. Even when we do get a commitment from someone, it's possible. They might still not fulfil the commitment. And of course, some of us are tempted to try to find a way to force that like how can I make that person do the thing or up? And some of us are. Easily able to let it go and like just focus on while what can I do? What do I have responsibility for so there's a lot of space in there for communication opportunities slowing down and thinking. Reflecting. Connecting more deeply with our loved ones. Finding, what brings us true joy in life and keeping more of that and letting go of those things that do not service they don't bring us the joy, the happiness or the fulfilment, my husband and I have been talking about this one before I was even graduated from college. So starting probably around age fifteen or sixteen. I started collecting things for the life I would have some day. I was collecting mostly kitchen things. So I have a lot of pots and pans and. A couple of different sets of plates and so forth. So I have a lot of kitchen things. And at some point after twenty, three years of marriage we have thought about. We should lead out some of these things. We don't need all of these things. That is true. When the kitchen is too full of pots, pans and dishes, it's hard to put them all away. It's tempting not to get them all clean quickly and nobody really wants to use the kitchen if it's too full of things. So we've been talking about pulling all the things out of the cabinets going through everything only putting back what we use the most what we love what is beautiful. And then donating the rest, we have a shop that we can donate things to where they will give them or sell them to people who need those things. And those things can have fresh new life. I'm looking forward to that very excited about that. So that is one way that I am working to simplify. Another way I'd like to simplify is to reduce the number of commitments I truly have. I used to be a person with many projects. I was going a lot of different directions. I had several part time things. I. Like to Juggle a lot of commitments. and. Maybe that's because I like variety or maybe that's because I like to be excited about new things to do I don't know. But I have lately reduced those giving myself a lot more time to spend with my husband, my son. Calling my family members and really doing things and being with those people I love the most. I've also been able to build some really good coaching relationships with those that I'm coaching and had a lot more space to do what I want to do with that and several people have hit some tough experiences. The pandemic brings anxiety. The world feels like it has changed many people are afraid of violence in their cities concerned about what the future might bring wondering if resources will ever be there again. There's so much going on and so much uncertainty. At the same time as there is this uncertainty, there's also the fact that the future has always been uncertain. We can never know what will happen tomorrow we suspect we might, but we don't really know it. So for that reason, the future is always uncertain. Even though we believe we know what will happen tomorrow or next week maybe this concert we were going to go to. An event we thought about doing. Even though we have those plans, the truth is it hasn't happened, yet it's likely to happen. We expect it to happen, but it is actually uncertain. and. Right. Now, the fact that the future is uncertain seems to surprise to people. It is a surprise because being reminded that our future is uncertain is a shock but every day the future is uncertain. It is the truth and it will always be the truth. Given, the uncertain future that lies before you. What areas of your life would you like to change? Simplify. Clear out cleanup. Let go. Are there a relationships that you would like to fine tune right now? Are there areas of your living arrangement that you would like to or and? Maybe tidy up or lean out. Are there parts of your time. I don't know if you've thought about this very much but I had not until the last year or so. Some of the thoughts we think our mental habits. Just like we might have a habit of eating. A snack before bedtime or something like that certain thoughts, we have actually habits. So we might think a certain way and it becomes a habit. Like some people tend to think if someone cuts them off and traffic that they did it on purpose. Or they might think if someone brings him a gift that they love them, there are just certain mental habits. We have an in the spirit of simplifying and weeding out things letting go things. This is a great time to think about what are their thought patterns that we might want to let go and never think again, our thoughts that we think control. So much of our experience, they often feel automatic emotional responses, automatic actions and behaviors. Our brain is hardwired to run through a series of events very quickly when we have certain thoughts. So we'll have this thought and almost everything that follows it is often on autopilot. So that's why I'm calling it a habit. You think a certain thing. Then you're gonNA feel a certain thing and do a certain thing and get a certain result, right? No matter what that thought was. Triggered by certain thoughts, yield certain outcomes for you. Do you WanNa let go of thought patterns I suggest thinking about assumptions you might have around whatever the thing is. Let's just take the one about someone cutting you off in traffic when you're driving a car if that thought occurs to you every single time someone cuts you off, you might want to think something else you could turn on. The radio and think about the music and let go of the person. You could tell yourself a different story and it's okay to make up a story. You don't have to know the actual fact you could make up a story that the person is in an emergency trying to get to the hospital. There are a lot of different stories that we can tell ourselves if you're really seeking. The truth all the time. This might be difficult to let go of knowing things but living with uncertainty is a really great habit to get into especially in the world we're living in right now that is much more uncertain than ever seemed to be before this time to simplify to weed out, let go possessions time commitments. We don't need anymore and thought patterns that are not serving us. An. As we're letting go of all this, what do we replace it with? Well, what do you want to replace it with? What would you like more of in your life? Are there things that you used to do that? You loved that you don't do anymore I was talking to one person who loved going fishing he used to love going out. On the lake taking has the shing boat and just sitting for hours catching fish in the quiet early morning hours and when I asked well, why don't you do that anymore, he really could not think of a reason. So he fixed up his boat and got on that lake and he was doing it again pretty soon. So what kind of things used? To be part of your life that are not anymore and you'd like more of them think about that and also are there things you want in your life that you haven't ever had before but you want it now maybe you want more time with your family, maybe you're single and you want to find someone and be in a relationship or maybe. Community. There are ways to connect with people even if you have to be social distancing what about spirituality and faith if you don't have these things in your life and you really are seeking a sense of greater meaning and purpose in your life, these can be very helpful and connecting with your higher power and getting a sense of direction and more meaning. I highly encourage this if you're interested in it and there are a lot of ways to seek that out and fulfil that area to listen to the silence in this period, there's a lot of noise out there. There's a lot of people talking, but there's also a lot of quiet and a lot of silence. If you give yourself the time to slow down and reflect and really think. What do I want more of in my life? Something is going to clearly come into your mind. and. Then you can create a plan. Once you know what you want. That's the most important answer. The. How will take care of itself? Your subconscious brain will get to work on helping you get that thing and your conscious mind will to. You'll be thinking about it more and you'll figure out a way to get it into your life. So as you think about this great slowdown and simplifying and letting go and making way for the new or the refreshed parts of Your Life I, wish you all the best. It's a grand adventure and definitely one worth taking. Here's to being the best version of you. This has been a podcast called "M indset for life," by Bethanie at DrBCoach.Com. You can find me on the web. You can visit my blog or my website at www.DrBCoach.Com. dot com dr be coached dot com. That's D R B C A C H DOT com.

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253 - Live at the Arvest Bank Theatre in Kansas City (2017)

My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark

1:29:09 hr | Last month

253 - Live at the Arvest Bank Theatre in Kansas City (2017)

"This is exactly right i i'm cara clank and i'm lisa traeger and we're comedians s few super fans and the hosts of. That's messed up an svu podcast on the exactly right network every tuesday. We'll take you through an iconic episode of law and order special victims unit and do a deep dive into the true crime. It's based on we also interview actors from the episodes. So if you love us view marathon or you're just looking at another true crime to your roster we're the pod for you. Listen and subscribe to. That's messed up. An s few podcast every tuesday on apple podcast stitcher or wherever you listen don On practice that come out so bad at it. I'm these days. I'm doing it where it sounds like. I'm being kind of like insinuating. Could be anything i'm like. I know you guys did something bad. What's up kansas city. The we know about things. You've been studying now researching them poorly day hours even cutting pasting meeting the fuck out of things thought. True this guy right here now. I feel like they added a road. And you guys are just in the back of the plane fucking. You brought your own chairs. You're like the painting company. We're just gonna be one moment. Twenty-five folding chairs second rose livid that'd be awesome brought the rug they're much. This is a gorgeous piece so nice. They always the history of missouri right on this starts over here with the founding of the state of the us. In what why you remember. You don't wanna go again. This is not a history lesson as we don't have dates and places. We have nothing offer you saw. I don't have my glasses on their bride. Sitting it out on second. It's a beautiful bright in and says the husband did it on her. Oh shit are we going into a play area. We've never been in before. Or would i like to think is that you just got married and then right up the ceremony or like i'm going to be back in two and a half hours. Your day is over. Yeah you're just a wife wives representing. I go to the car because i lost. My bra took my bra and i was like this tour manager. Numbers is a husband john. Because if you go get my bra he can take me to court not allowed. It's simply not allow us. Also that's funny because that's something that happens to you in real life that maximum. It happened to me in a terrible nightmare. Where like middle of about. I'm about to go on stage. And i'm like i'm not wearing. This show cannot go on. I'm not wearing a bra. I look like a little boy. So it's not. Like i need a bra to a different mindset. It's more of a presentational thing as opposed to holding back this last night. This has been brought weekend if you weekend for me because this this dress let me tell you about it. It's made take a walk so all the people can see just into new way of modeling. And i think it works. I think it's fierce day. Doubt all of her armpit base but sorry. I interrupted you. I wish she would. This is by current favorite poet and feminist. Jessica simpson yes. She's a leader and a visionary behind her one hundred percent of proceeds from the stress. That i didn't buy go-to simpson. The justice jessica simpson foundation teaches her about star. Kist tuna remember. Remember that old thing from ninety seven years ago. That's what you're going to get here all references all like vh one reality show references get pulled on your hats a better place in time. She makes these dresses in its per people boobs. Even if it's a small dress with people who are smaller that don't have boobs are just. She's just like everyone has them. Yeah so i had like stuff this dress. And so i came out last night and i had like double d boot because they were stuff to the fucking hell they were happening. Yeah and then. I took the cutlass we learn. You know yes. Left him onstage. Did those come with address or do you own cutlet. I own them. Vintage dresses again. tiny waist. Big boobs you have to fill the chiefs fucking and i won't get anything altered or fake booze that fifteen grand or however often to groupon john splurge. Let's talk about this book and thank you. I went all the way off road. Thank you god. I wish i could explain my clothes. I've given up on dresses. But not in a. I was having fun with them. And then we stop tori for a little while and when we started again the first show that we did. I just brought the last dress. I had worn not wanting for the time in between there where i had been eating fast food like. It was my passion in life and so i went to address on. It was like so for that shows like look. I simply can't wear my dress. And then once i was up here in my regular clothes like just more of my regular. It's so fun. Don't know why you for life. I mean but it was very celebratory kind of like. It's a big deal to us to be here. So i shouldn't where my pajamas but it turns out that that's what i wanna do. You did your hair. Listen right look listen to your hair. I couldn't have more eye shadow on. I'm doing a lot of neck up shit right now. It's just where i am. I'm not gonna apologize. And you shouldn't neither terry stress. It's a stressful time. It's a stressful time talking about your airport and so when we left to come here all of our friends and of course our tour manager. Vince told us yes. The greatest tour manager on the road today. He let us know that we're going to be leaving. La which was around seventy eight degrees with fires on all sides every circle of fire. Look like is that right. No reference on trying to make is that game of thrones. That's close close close. I same outfits. It's lorraine's it's what lord of the rings return of the jet. I whatever twenty one. I stopped pretending for guys that i gave a shit fantasy just like no. I don't want to sit through this. I wanna watch thirteen going on thirty goodbye. It's a classic film. So vince was like we're leaving here. And this temperatures and we're going it's twenty where we're going so and that kind of work yesterday because we would just come we are you have to. Here's how degrees. It's going to be time you for the airport. Here's what day leaving flops. No snowflake flops. So i had to call people that i knew traveled across the country often and we're wealthy and i was like can i borrow. Your nice coat can eibar things. So i'd like rounded up a bunch of warm mean cold weather close. But then i was like. I'm getting a monkey bars. She is going to be so. I went to designer. She warehouse which you guys have those here right so what i always forget. It seems like the best idea because it's very convenient. But what i always forget. Is the reason that shoes are at the designer. She warehouses because they're broken and they don't work and people in like department stores were like what the fuck is this neon tennessee with a. He'll you and they throw it over their shoulder and then someone comes and picks in drives it over to the designer shoe warehouse to admit it own but yeah but you wanna shoo. You just wanna pay nine ninety nine in and pretend it's gonna work out. So i bought these beautiful fleece lined boots and then when we actually landed in the airport bathroom. I changed from high slip on shoes with no socks into these but they weren't made to hold human fee do you so. I had not tried them on. Of course not i. To live on the ad know about karen is. There's no way you try on before. I live in department stores and the girls at working. The women that work in department stores will come and be like. Can i get adjusting for him. You never know means. None of my business weather fits or trainings. But i'm so claustrophobic. That i just change in the middle of the storm. I finally got corner mirror. And i have like a weird t shirt on it yet. That's boring well. No but you're because you're a bit of a nudist give it touches the nissim just still going. We're opposite sees anyhow trying to put these boots on in the bathroom stall in the saint louis airport. It took me fully ten minutes a full on ten minutes they probably thought it was like dying of appendicitis or something and i couldn't like you couldn't you can't slip your. There's a hard left. Turn inside the shoe. That my can't take. I'm just saying sales. Third sale shoes are to be avoided. It'd be great is if you had not removed. And i haven't seen without them. These pants on these shoes this entire. I'm just saying. I haven't seen without them sleeping in this ninja outfit every night on top of the blankets. Yes they'll never find me. They'll never detect me these flower stage there from one of your local florist back back. Oh biko biko yeah go. They smell really brin chris. Rachel thanks lassie guys. Classy smell good. They said i think he might be the murderer so he got you flowers like at a funeral and no one ever sick of murder. These the flowers. I wanted my funeral every single thing. Death related okay. I'm done spinning now. Oh what else do we have to the ozarks today. Oh we went to ozark land like you recommended. They're like no. We would've told you it was pretty great. I mean the shit that they were advertising on the side of the wall. How could we not stop. What was that. We're going to buy a plaque. That would only have taken up room and had no purpose except for like to hang it in your sassy kitchen. What did it say. It said something something stanley it just said what were the first two. It was like good. Times and pain is tam line. I mean who in this world doesn't appreciate. I feel like because we're from los angeles. We don't appreciate how great tan lines are. They here you guys like i wanna fuck and tan line. Give me tamla. That means vacation. Yeah but we bought at present that you guys are going to be privy to later yet for. Whoever does the hometown murder. And i want to do the hometown murder i fucking wanted like. Why did we buy more. It's let's just say it's a it's a timeless piece that we got it. Ozark land gas taffy thing like they have like a like a gag gift section and i was like oh my nephews like seven with some gag. Stuff even though. I don't think you're supposed to do that anymore. It's like bullying and like gag gifts or like. Oh really. we can't have gifts. Sometimes garlic come on once asked him in front of every act like lunch. And i was like mica. Who's the stupidest brothers like georgia like everyone. Smart the same. No he was like ricky he knew new and also. My brother bullied the broken over my head and i was a kid. So he's kids getting gifts and he's going to use them on his dad. So i had the gum like the looks like wrigley's fruit and then you go to get his apps. Even i was like i bet these have been here forever and they don't work so i did it to myself on accident. I bet this. I'm to try. It was at work. How stupid is that. But i did it myself. You think kind of a high voltage gum. Was it good south. It was a great little. Really my brother's going to get it year. Happy hannukah from ozark land there was. I have to say neither picture of this to prove it. The best graffiti i've ever seen in a bathroom. Planned was jewish star. Someone had drawn and it said we are not alone missouri. Jews are you okay. Is everything one guys like or no good news. You're not alone. Does they meet their every wednesday. Install rapper who saw also underneath that in a different color pen. Someone had written for a good time called. jesus set. That's disrespectful to everybody. That doesn't work out in any direction. You're saying jesus is i. Don't think so kind of phone. Do you think. Jesus has the who night on x. Probably i think like has an old wall like an old rotary found that he walks all the way around the world with a really long cord. Somebody paint that for me. Don't fucking ask for things you know. You're the people that can do it. Someone at the angry last night gave us this beautiful gift of doll walking towards us. Not saying a word with like one thousand nine hundred seventy s knitted clown doll. And then she ends it. She was lovely. I didn't kill the clowns smiling. And she said turn it over and you turn it over and the face on the back of its head at its. It's like angrier. Has different angry feelings was crying crying. I don't know it had knitted silver tears on. Its cheeks haunted. It was the most haunted item in america. And you can tell that it's it's like forty years old but it looked brand new so some like aunt who to her her nephew and not knowing what kids like. And she's like i'm not having kids and the kid was like i hate it when ever loved this dog. They're like mommy. Put it away and then it went up into the attic forever and now right next to the board and then it started touching the we yes hold on and then the weight and then jesus off not today there you go well. It's going to fucking pablo houses now. Haunted let the next podcast speaking podcast. Yeah this is my favorite murder. Oh thanks thanks. Let's go. Gary hart sir. These are the faces of the voices that you've been listening to and then we turn around and or crying. That's whom you start doing down thirteen at the continental dance routine. Who's ready. no one's ready. No one is ready. No one's ready. My uncle michael hart came to the show last night. Lives in st louis He's he's an older gentleman. Lovely man he came backstage outdoors not to. I don't know how to sit. I didn't know what to expect. I knew you had a podcast. I thought they're not gonna be dancing. Are they know at all. And then we're talking about boehner's onstage with mike it just slipped out although how we doubt that we're talking about it i feel like a dancing. Podcast might be insanely bad ass because it just be like distant music and then the sound of feet and you just kind of like this a great huffing and puffing. Here's what will be slow. Mama siemens not here. Sorry he can't come on the road because he adopts too many cats you just too much to like. Pick up kittens. He's like you know every once in a while like every six months anymore but used to be every six months in the news. You hear a story of a guy that i'd like fifteen. Turtle shoved up his sleeves. Get across the border. That's totally stephen. With kittens stephen a fake leg stuffed with kit to have his leg after just wanted to put kim. He did it for the love of canton vata's dedication he would do that. Let's spread that rumor. He's perverted for a good time. I'll stephen and his leg. He's perverted per not watching my cats this time and i think i. I saw his heartbreak in his eyes. And i told him that our friends were staying in town at our place and i just saw it and i know he's watching the instagram being like that. They're not going to be better than eating me. And i can see this. Yes mississippi seeven. Yeah i love the way. We talk about stephen as we do recorded show as if he's never going to listen to it and he's the first person that here's all of this before you guys. Even it gets in your ear. He's already. he's on it and has edited out this part. Every time you all i want is a sip of that beer. That's going to be honest. Should we sit down yes. I'm getting away from that beer screen stuff you've is here. Hey hear the water there do this okay. Can i get an allen wrench for this chair. Just tighten tighten up some nuts on this chair little. I have chair fear. Oh no wobbly. Show the crowd probably a little might be. You might be wobbly. It might be me. Oh yeah that secrets. That's for later. We'll see flowers. Are you guys ready to talk about some murder down. Let everyone know. This is not impatient. Know yet this is not les miserables. You went to the wrong place. If that's what you thought it would be not a mannheim. Steamroller christmas concert. Yeah those are the if you go that way. I don't know that way of find that and the other wheel that so this is not with. This is in less. Lame is rob. Is it true crime. Well it is kind of a pretty true crime right at the beginning. Okay and then the crime of war anyhow. It's also it's a comedy podcast where we talk about true crime. And sometimes that bumps people out and so if you're the kind of person that gets bummed out by stuff like that get the fuck out. I'm joking i'm joking. That's the comedy part. Do get bummed out. Don't worry little hilarity but not because you never. Today's episode is brought to you by a new limited series on. Cbs all access the stand. Yes the stand. Is stephen king's apocalyptic vision of a world decimated by plague and embroiled an elemental struggle between good and evil. You guys the fate of mankind rests on the frail shoulders of the hundred and eight year. Old mother abigail played by. Whoopi frigging goldberg and a handful of survivors. Their worst nightmares embodied in a man with a lethal smile in unspeakable powers randall. Flagg the dark man who's played by alexander skarsgard. This limited series will close with code written by stephen king himself. I cannot wait for this. Tv show the stand a new series is streaming now only on cbs. all access. i for many of us. The holidays will look different this year. Family and friend. Reunions might not be the same but that shouldn't stop us from feeling close. Give your loved ones the most meaningful gift. This year a chance to tell their story and share memories using story worth story worth is an online service that helps your loved ones share stories through thought provoking questions about their memories and personal thoughts every week story worth emails. Your family member. Different story prompts questions. You've never thought to ask like what's a small decision you made ended up having a big impact on your life. Reading the weekly stories is fun and make your family feel close. Even if you're not together after one year story worth will compile all your stories including pictures into beautiful. Keep sick book that ship for free. This is such a great gift for that one person in your family. I have my lane. Who knows every story from our family and from our history so to give this to her and ask all these really cool questions and then you can give that book to your entire family. So it'll always be written down. Yeah that's the thing is that this is a really beautiful gift for one person that actually everybody gets that gift leader on. Yes who doesn't want a book like that great point so give your loved ones. The gift of spending time together wherever you live with story worth get started right away with no shipping required by going to story worth dot com slash. Mfm you'll get ten dollars off your first purchase. That story worth dot com slash. Mfm ten dollars off. Goodbye verse today. Yeah i'm i. I'm i and i had to say this case is fascinating to me. I i saw on an episode of forty. eight hours. came in you Middle half and was so a hypnotized by the subject that was being interviewed on the story and his personality. And what was happening that i couldn't stop watching it and i became obsessed with it and then stephen who sends us suggestions of cases that we could do sent me the suggestion. I freaked out. Because i didn't realize that it was in this area so i don't know if you guys know about the international house of prayer and the tyler. Fuck dude okay. Buckle the fuck now this is technically this is technically not a murder And i have to say that for legal reasons. I when i was researching this amazing rolling stone article that is called love and death in the house of prayer by a man named jeff teats. That's an amazing article. That's incredibly thorough. Highly recommend that you read but at the beginning of this rolling stone article there. is this disclaimer. Which i'm going to review so it also counts for me. Because when i read it because i was like a liz amazing. I'm just going to retail that forty eight hours that i love and then i read this. I was just like holy shit. I think some people wrote some cease and desist letters or something. I don't know i can't wait. So that's a very top of this article. It said editor's note in october. Twenty fourteen nearly a year. After this story appeared the case against michael moore. You'll need him later. Not michael moore. The tuchman syrian. God you guys loved him was dismissed basically. They say that's a long quote from a lawyer. You don't really need okay. With no trial trial no longer eminent the prosecutor's office and moore's defense attorneys released critical pieces of exculpatory evidence. For the first time when we reported this story a year earlier without access to this new information we presented the criminal case against moore as entirely credible more implicated tyler eaten in the alleged crime and we presented. That implication is credible as well but the evidence available now suggests overwhelmingly that bethany deaton committed suicide. That more and dayton are innocent of any crime we now know verifiable statement more made to. The detectives was either proven false or was contradicted by the evidence after confession. Investigators discovered no additional evidence that a crime had occurred and both circumstantial and forensic evidence point to suicide we to reconsider the story in light of the totality of the evidence a comprehensive account of that evidence including more detail on moore's confession and suicide is presented below in the original fucking article doesn't prepare you guys get that we have a court reporter. That's writing so that felt important to say but i don't follow any of that great perfect because i realized i kind of i kind of buried the lede there. Well not really though because the story itself is fascinating. Whatever the truth of it is. I'm not sure where we are with that right now. Suicide at the end of this right true. Okay and i want to pronounce beth. Original name is lead lynn. Does anybody know if that's incorrect pronunciation lead land. That's it okay. So i think it's okay i just don't i just don't want it. Stay wrong okay. So badly lead lindgren devoutly christian home in suburban dallas. She and her four siblings. Were all home schooled. She read every dickens novel except for one by the time she was thirteen and upon finishing high school she won a scholarship to southwestern university in georgetown. Texas near austin did. Did you ever finish that loss. Dickens mom we will never know why did that get included. She way missouri. Every old book is written by charles dickens the end she was genuinely talented writer. And in this article you read it. They have chunks of her writing. She had a blog for a while and she really is. Writing is really really good and very original. A super impressed by it so she became the pride of south westerns writing center and she eventually would graduate magna cum lada but in two thousand seven. She was invited to join a prayer group that was started by fellow. Student in christian named tyler dayton so according to tyler Right before he was about to begin his junior year at southwestern university while he was standing outside barnes and noble waiting for the midnight. Release of harry potter and the deathly hallows. We were there right. No dog commanded him to form worship group in line. He just got word. He got bored and started hearing the voice of god so apparently that's summer he had been doing missionary work in pakistan and he claims while he was there he saw a number of supernatural. Things occur one of which was a young boy who had one leg acquired his second leg in. The word used is acquired. Stephen that like that's the singularity taking place in the night die is just like mega. Circle has come full okay. So they name a couple of other supernatural experiences that he claims to have had a lot of them seem to be maybe intuition or maybe just some of them are like things like he would command birds to fly away and they would like so if you say something in a loud voice. Birds fly away. I've seen that happen before. People without power one of them said one time people neighbors were playing music loudly and tyler yelled jesus in the music stopped just like will you just sound like the angry neighbor that wants them to turn the music off. That doesn't that's not religious specifically. I'm gonna need more than that so anyway. He came back to america and he wanted to see these supernatural. Things happening here in america. He wanted he wanted more of that in his life. And so of course. The answer came outside of barnes and noble. God's god said to him what you just did in pakistan so apparently he. He was kim who acquired the second leg for the boy. Where you just didn't pakistan. You're going to do it. Southwestern and the lord told him who should be in this prayer circle that he was supposed to start a guy named justin. A girl named june and bethany lead land. So tyler starts the group with those four people. They're all christians. They are all at the small university together so aside from when they would get together. Aside from bible study and praying together they would spend hours discussing harry potter books and films which they approached with a quote religious devotion. A guy who joined after the initial for his name bows harrington and he he. He was a person who talked to this report of the most rolling stone. And he said that the books few fueled our sense of being on a divine mission. They also supported. tyler's obsession the paradigm of good and evil. So tyler had been a champion debater in high school and he applied those skills to his religious pursuits in college. He believed that he was right. An anyone who didn't share his beliefs. Which would be kind of evangelical christians leave was ignorant and his senior quote in the kolin high school yearbook from corpus christi. Texas red be intolerance because some things are just stupid shirt lawsuit. I gods paging through that yearbook. And he reads that. He's like i'm gonna talk to this guy. This this is who. I want to start sending messages. Ter- i was gonna to the guy who quoted led zeppelin but no cancer now. Everyone's heard that one. Okay but this this ability to argue this logical thinking and this passion and dedication also made him a very effective evangelist. The foreperson prayer circle soon grew to have over twenty members and in that forty. Eight hours Episode tyler says they interview him. And i highly recommend that you watch that if you haven't seen it already because it is an he's an amazing individual and now he clearly went on that show to prove his innocence in to to prove that he didn't have anything to do with bethany as death. I guess i should say so. On in that interview he says my gift and something that is also occurs. Is that i'm charismatic. Oh i'm charismatic. I've owned that from the beginning. I'll own it to the end. I can be electric and magnetic. Glad he's owning owning it. Know what you say is i'm gase. I've been gase from the humane from the only moaning it. That's what you own. you don't own. I'm view line. So gorgeous look look. People have accused fine of al ticket. Hauntingly beautiful and electric and magnetic okay but he was also conflicted because from from since he can remember he had homosexual impulses that he could not control any felt very conflicted about that because it did not line up with his evangelical christian upbringing or beliefs that he held himself. He told friends that he knew that there was a connection between this his interest in these because he also liked shit. What's the other a the narnia books. Yes thank you the chronicles of narnia. So close i. It's fucking andrews. I have i have the audio. I'm still listening to audio book. Has it's hard to take. But oh my god some of the phrases that those that they use in the book my sweet audrain f anyone's reading along. I don't know if anybody notices at one point near the near the beginning. I think she's describing vera the cousin and she says clumsily clambering down the hall clumber is not a word is it. Tyra bazeley told his friends that he knew he was obsessed with these fantasy novels harry potter witchcraft. And all these things bethany in this as the prayer group gets bigger. Bethany invites her friend. Mike more into the group in two thousand seven they had met in english class. They hit it off. They were really good friends. He told her story about dropping acid and having visions of demons fighting over his soul. And so she's like. I think you should come to our prayer group. That sounds like acid yet right like it could be that or could be like one time. I took asset and then it was just goofy space spinning and spinning and spinning. I think you should come to disneyland. That dog again so she believed that michael was a lost soul in need of saving. There are many of these people on the south western campus and this programs job. They slowly began to believe that their job was to save the souls so in december. Two thousand seven tyler. His cousin told him he should go to a seminar at at the international house of prayer in kansas city and it's a charismatic christian movement based here in kansas city and nearby suburb of grandview and the people the people that go to this church. Maybe some of you are here closure ears which is about to say you. Don't think about these things until you're saying them out loud to a large group of people in this podcast. What exists if we had to have set every episode in front of you know no way. Here's something the comfort of my living room of just those cat staring at you. No one else stephen. The basically this is the tenant and it's there doesn't editorial this is fact their their belief is that the second coming will be soon and the god needs a our help to return to earth by fighting the anti christ so this is all very eminent issue. They believe so. They also believe that young people will make up god's army and they will fight the anti christ in a seven year battle called the tribulation. And when that's over. Jesus is going to return to earth and then take up a sword and kill all the unsaved people and then the survivors will rule heaven and earth for eternity. God i need a nap. That's fucking shit. Just which definitely say that. I just wanna really quickly remind the jews of missouri. You're not alone. It just feels relevant for this moment a lot. It means a lot to me. Okay name also in their teachings there the way that they explained things the way you should pray and interact with god is you should see christ as your bright broom and right grew and that your prayer experience should be one of intimacy with him and there's a lot of strong sexual undertones in in the way they worship. According to ex members tell who talked to rolling stone and at the international international house of pancakes prayer flags. I mean i. It's it's actually brilliant marketing of them. They're just like you know it. Now come over here. You have breakfast now. Go over and get save. And it's like if you're trying to recruit someone. Do you want to go to. I hop on something like how they have different flavors of syrup and god shirt i feel like i have is the opposite of church like in the feeling i have when i think about how much time is spent in church staring starving hating. Then you're an ihop and you're just like sarah that's my issue now. We're talking catholicism. We're going to don't worry then we're gonna go to hindu. We're going to hit it all tonight. Thank god run out the back so happy at this complex. The ihop complex. They play music all the time in cafeterias in the hallways that prayer rooms and it's composed by the elders of the church to enhance the ecstatic experience and make it omni-present and former i. Hoppers talked about being addicted to that music. That when it turned off they become very nervous and irritable and they also talk about the senate of atmosphere of the prayer room. Bail go to a program for hours and hours at a time. And when they leave the prayer room they become anxious discouraged and they often say to each other. I gotta get back into the prayer room so just scientifically. We've got a lot of it things here. That are matching up with colt practices indoctrination in colton and brainwashing but just in that way of k. Turn music off for a little while you know what i mean but some beyond say on. Let's have some fun. How about an hour. A solid hour of prayer. And then you go throw frisbee for why does need to be four hours. But i'm not in charge. So members of the church prayed all day and night sessions of mesmeric musical worship repeating the same phrases over and over for hours at a time. So when tyler came home he went there at his cousins and he had a he went and had like a weekend there. Whatever in my mind a weekend but it could have been fuck seventy days but when he came back to college he told all of his friends in the prayer prayer group. He had transformation and that he had been chosen to train. God's final army so things are getting serious so in spring of two thousand eight. Everyone in the group believed that tyler was an end times apostle and that they had sell themselves or receiving prophecies from god so in the stories that you read these kids are starting to believe they also are being talked to by god and then they're telling each other the prophecies and it truly is are things like. I told me a prophecy. That i should marry you and then the other person will be like why don't agree with this prophecy and everything is becoming very like. It's a message from god. It has to happen. Where are the fucking teachers in this whole story there in that part of the library. No one goes in with the weird magazines. Plastic bad coffee get of whispering. Yeah nobody really knows what's going on. Okay so basically. Tyler tells the group that they're all gonna move to kansas city to be closer to i hop central. And they're like we're down where we are soldiers in god's army so in early two thousand nine tyler and bethany moved to grandview missouri to begin i hop six month internship program so from a to four. Pm every day they absorbed biblical analysis biology. And then from six 'til midnight. They worshiped in the prayer room. Six till midnight is six hours. We're going to sit here you. How much worship that is. Because it's a ton so then slowly the other kids from their group who either were still in school whatever. They were slowly moving up to kansas city to move there and they started a thing called the community. And this is tyler is idea they Lived in two separate houses boys in one house girls in the other. The houses were four miles apart. And they then they would meet together in the boy's house have communal meetings And tyler was receiving messages from god. Not only about the coming tribulation but he also had messages about where people should sit at dinner. And how should dress. I don't think god gives a shit about that stuff now. I'm gonna go ahead. That's not what the messages that tyler is getting said. Show all right okay. There was a lot of a lot of control and a lot of you. Don't think for yourself. I think for you because god told me so. Then the members of the group Start cutting out friends and family members. Who aren't that into what they're doing. Of course because there are oppressing their allegiance to god's army for the tribulation and and then he starts discouraging relationships between them. Saying that are a distraction and an offense to god but he did encourage prolonged affectionate contact particularly among men because he said they were had been wrongly socialized against it so they needed to hug and cuddle. Give each other massages. Because if you're uncomfortable with another man's touch than you had a wall in your heart and you only experiencing part of god's love and that you couldn't function as a christian in this way so then tyler claims to the group that he has a revelation that is homosexuality is actually a choice and so a few days later. He says as he's sitting in the prayer room watching bethany worship so that any had actually had a big crush on him for a long time. It was a big part of why she was such a huge part of this group and she had told him that she had a marriage prophecy about him and when she told him that he like ice star and was just like no and was really cold to her and it broke her heart but she stayed in and she believed that she believed thomas. Sexuality was a sickness that needed to be cured him and that she was just going to standby and be patient and basically love him out of it so one day. He announces to the group that he was in his words sitting in the prayer room watching bethany worship and he felt a giant vat of affection rush over him. That's a direct quote. Oh does not sound very romantic. Not i mean every bit different but just that spill all oh just a boiling scolding. Vat of affection tumbled just this. He actually later wrote in an essay. I was experiencing real passionate sexual. Knock me off my feet here and glorious attractions for the most beautiful woman alive so then when they complete their internship there he asks her out and in the summer of two thousand nine. He announces to her that he intended to pursue her unto marriage. Which is i guess. The bible way of saying it so of course she's thrilled. This is like what she was kind of hanging in there and waiting for. And she thinks he's finally seen the light and they're going to be all aligned in the spirit just made that up. Are you joining. And then the idea of jesus with a sword does kind of baby. Smile a little bit. It's just exactly the opposite of how he works in every way. Yes you can say that. Like a fallen angel would calm like maybe michael. He was a big fighter. But jesus isn't gonna come and kill people with a sore. He's a hippie. Have our own beliefs okay. So here's how they did it to the group. They think this is a stage relationship and this is why they went on a date. Every tuesday between six and nine and then they spent fridays baking bread together. That was the extent of how they hung. There was no netflixing in. There was no chilling. Escorted in the eye vince. Baking bread for hours. Okay tyler claim that anything more than that would be subordinating. The needs of the group to their own means So group i group. I group i which is another huge colt thing. He discouraged bethany from physical displays of affection. They would not kiss until their engagement two and a half years later. Where is that that affection we were talking about the that is at a tilt if not pouring. It's not a stream or waterfall of affection yet. She was promised the vat. And i'm gonna okay so they get married in august of two thousand twelve. And in this procession he sings come to me my beloved so the groom is singing at his own wedding wrong right. How much would you pay to be at that way so much money. Well the mother. So there's of course. The mother is in this forty eight hours episodes. Of course it's tragically sad. Because essentially her daughter just got taken away from her and then died in a way that she in no way believes she would do. She's not as she knew her as her daughter. She would kill herself and she says that at this wedding. It looked like this. This adjoining of these apostolic. It looked like a religious ceremony about something else as opposed to a wedding of people that were in love and she said it was seeing her. He was singing at her and there was a you know. Of course it was a lot of like the leaders of the army. There's just a lotta shit. That was very exclusionary to family and friends but they were there anyway so they said that bethany seemed resolved and serene result at your wedding. Look look. I'm doing it doing this fucking doing jordan almonds have been purchased and put into little baggies. No going back. I got on one thousand pounds of jordan moments throwing away. Not for you now for anybody. But some people in attendance said that they super uneasy and they were spooked by Tyler's evident power over bethany and several of her old friend said they had a deep sense that they were saying goodbye to her. For the final time very sad so members of the prayer groups say bethany showed a marked change when the couple came back their three week honeymoon. They said that she was really different. She was very withdrawn and she was acting really weird and she was. She had moved into the men's house into the basement with tyler but she kept coming back to the woman's house and staying there for days at a time then on october third. She was temporarily admitted to truman medical center after threatening suicide not attempting but threatening so ten weeks later on october thirtieth twenty twelve at nine forty pm. Sheriff's deputies respond to a report of a dead body in the parking lot near long view lake picnic shelter number twelve in tan. Ford windstar van in the back seat deputies found the body of bethany deaton. A white plastic trash bag has been pulled over her head and tied under her chin. She's twenty seven years old at the time on the console. There's two bottles of tylenol pm. One is unopened is empty now bethany in in the time of them being up here and being this church she had gone back to school and gotten she became a registered nurse. Which is i think an important factory to know about this that she was a registered nurse with access to any drug that she wanted and commit suicide by taking one full bottle of tylenol pm and then putting a bag over. Your head doesn't make sense. It also doesn't make sense because her eyes were open and she had inhaled the bag. And if you owe deed on something you would be out especially like a sleeping pill over the counter sleeping pill like that. She had been asleep but open so the police were baffled. By what what they found here because there was also a suicide note next to her but it just said i am evil. It just said all the stuff that kind of didn't sound like her. It was written in her handwriting. But it wasn't her voice and it certainly wasn't like any of the writing that they put in this rolling stone article in the beginning that's very original and very very accurate self expression. She was very good at expressing yourself on paper and this was like a weird list of i'm bad and wrong and it should just be over. Now she did. Her friends did say there was a marked change when they came back from the honeymoon. So who knows. I mean like there's something could have happened. We don't know so ten days after that. The body bodies found mike amore. Her friend that she got to join the group who had eventually moved up in twenty eleven. He moved up to kansas city as well and joined the community and when he did there was a big upset in the men's house and all the rooms switched around and Tyler basically wanted michael to move into his room and there was kind of it was kind of an issue So anyway after the bodies found mike walks into the grandview police station and confesses that he killed bethany. His account is bizarre and salacious But he knew about the crime scene that you couldn't have known unless you were there in that van. He also claimed that he did it. Under tyler's orders so basically. He told detectives that over the past few months. Bethany had been dosed with the antipsychotic. Sarah quail and that. He and several men in the house had been sexually assaulting her when she was out they thought she would tell someone about it and under questioning by detectives to the men in the house who had recently moved out revealed that they were in ongoing sexual relationships with tyler and one of them said. This relationship was long-term. A said that tyler had groomed him to be part of their sexual group. They said he was manipulative. And exercised control over all the members of the household and he characterized all of their sexual activity as a religious experience. So then two weeks later after this huge so when he confesses all of this and then it suddenly the cops were like that would actually make sense if someone strangled her in that van. Then we know why these things that don't line up with an overdose happened. It's all starting to lineup for them and then michael. Moore's lawyer can't his on his behalf. She declares his confession. Bizarre fictional made by a distraught confused young man and then the charges are eventually dropped and beth news desk. It death is ruled a suicide but very few members of the original group of i think right around twenty somewhere. Twenty-three maybe none of the almost none of them believed bethany would commit suicide and the after her death. The community disintegrates. Everybody leaves people go back. People's parents come and pick him up like it's the whole the whole thing's over So now i'm going to read you. The speech tyler gave at bethany funeral as some of you know already. I am a man who is in love with ideas with crazy paradigm and then he laughed and and when they brought me bethany body at first i cry but then i laughed because i said to her bethany. If you could see you you would not like the way you look right now and last night. We worship time together very briefly as a group and it was wonderful and just showed me the lord's premacy over this wretched thing that his death and i thought to myself what a crazy paradigm. And then i thought bethany would love my paradigm. Because she loved me and was so fiercely. Supportive and believed me hundreds of times. When i thought i was crazy or heretical. The end following that speech. Now we're going to close this down now because everybody has to go to their car and scream at the top of their lungs. What in the living faulk blood in just really quick. I'm going to read you my favorite part of the forty eight hours interview. Because basically the interviewers says is true roberts and he says i have to ask you this question directly. Did you order mica to kill your wife. And he says no no. Of course not i mean i have read the media so i know the image mica is easily manipulable manipulable. That's not a word. What's the implication tyler manipulated. Him and robert says i'm asking you if he wanted to please you and then tyler gets real like real haughty real fast to. This is kind of great. Where i came in the first time i saw i was like oh what's happening now here. We go is it something like they don't they don't they. Don't know how they're being seen. They think that they think they're smarter than everybody. And he says is the reason you're asking me if he wanted to please me because you think his desire to please me somehow lead to foul play my sense listening indefinitely the way i think anybody watching. Did michael wanna please. You at the answer's yes. Then he could have done this thing that the media painted him as doing. And i don't think that's fair to mica or to myself a simple. No i mean none of it's fair to bethany and opinion lane so anyway. There's your super unsatisfying. Insane story the community. I wish this is the kind of show then. We could just watch episodes together. I want you to see it so bad. 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That's pretty litter dot com promo code murder for twenty percent off pretty litter dot com. Promo code murder by my story is about the oldest people ever sentenced to death in america. Ray fake copeland. Oh your friends. Everyone's grandfather and grandma here. You're copeland's great. You're all copeland's. We sectioned off a whole copeland area right down here. This is the copeland family reunion. Yeah let me tell you about your fucking grandpappy ray. Copeland was born december thirtieth. Twenty nine hundred fourteen doing great. You're doing great you off to a good start. Nineteen fourteen. he grew up in ozark hills. Arkansas he dropped out of school after fourth grade. Help on the family's farm as one kids did during the depression. Even though it was the great depression for some reason his parents spoiled the shit out of him and he got whatever he wanted. A strip lassus satori. Could i have an orange. please say a believer. Okay no. I liked it. A spoiled child during the depression is kind of a great thing about sex that you know he got one boot. Instituted my mom. His first documented crime is was that the twenty he stole two families logs and sold them in another town of setting up his fuck in 'em he just lured them away from all the other hogs with no one and then he's like. Hey my buddies. How old was he okay. So so he continued to practice his love stealing livestock and livestock. And then sell it to someone else pocket the money and then the person would be like but the fuck. I think they call that a wrestler. Isn't it no. I think about a professional wrestler. Cogan used to do it all the time. Then he started he found. He fell in love with a new thing that he loved forging checks. I understand that ask. Yeah that was this new thing and that landed in county jail for a year. Nineteen thirty six and the spring of nineteen forty. Ray made a routine visit to his physician's office in he meets a woman named fe dela golsen falls in love with her fe at. She's nineteen of time. She has been raised by hardworking couple from harrison but little money and raised seven children while living in a dirt floor cabin. What fucking bummer. Yes what dirt for cabinet. That was like five bedrooms. Three back happened after subway tile. It's funny because it always seems like if you were raised in a dirt floor cabin you're either going to grow up to be a check forger like murderer or you're going to grow to be like a country sensation like there's it's yes. It's dolly dolly. Are these people a lot in between. This isn't dolly story. Okay just fyi. I wanna see a picture of sharing. This is the young and pray. You can't see shit. They're murderers don't oh know they're kind of attractive. I take a bad check from him. That's it her hair is like. That's usually what i rocked in the ninety s. Some weird random. Bobby pin right there around like it's called style. Let's get drunk pack. So they started dating and six months. They'll married within a year. Have the first kid. And then i wrote. And they're married than six months again. Because i copied and pasted k. They have four kids over the next ten years. Ray keeps up his fucking passion of illegal shit. He sentenced to a year in jail for stealing horses from a neighbor's farm. And then the families like let's get the fuck outta here they're onto us and they moved to missouri and he's immediately arrested for cattle left again. Like the second gets here. He's like sorry you guys eat. I'm just real quick. I just a couple cows. I see across the street that seemed like they don't have an owner okay so he keeps doing this from nineteen fifty three to nineteen sixty six and they move from town to town stealing livestock and metrics and doing it again and again. It's totally his thing. Because before the internet or phones or whatever it was just kind of like it would be you'd hear till of somebody that stole the cow basically. Yeah but then that guy would show up and be like t need to borrow. The horse for an hour don't they. No one has a freckle horses in there. like bob tors branding. That's eight branded. Been any kind of but no bob source has shorter bangs. It's not. It's not bob's horse. Now i mean i'm like brandy fucking shit right. During the summer of nineteen sixty six to copeland family go back to missouri where array in fe successively purchase a small farm with forty acres of land in mooresville population. One hundred thirty now. It's not a good number for stealing stuff. No no big city blend in her real takes a job at glove making company. I thought you'd like that. Get that inbreeding. I bought you said lovemaking job back a company that comprise of the worst word in the english language. We make this word that everyone hates saying no gloves. You mean gloves gloves. Yeah i might be going deaf. a chance. Go get an so raise unpopular with neighbors. They call him a bitter elderly man. Fucking asshole lamb. You bigger elderly man. They think he's abusive. Of course they and her children real any snappy or called the owner of a local cafe supposed to be thinking of a giant turtle. Oh sorry you said a giant. Oh you're asking me about ray. Oh he's fine he he's got a hard shell own away. Biting snappy i. I don't think you guys have turned against him enough because ready. Yelda waitresses soccio. He tried to run over dogs in the streets. I knew you guys can be on my side after that so terrible it makes me laugh. This is where okay so now raise like a molder snappier. Ready star actually scheming. Oh so there's a photo of them old timey now so we can see what they fucking really look like like. Whoa 'cause they were cute before they look like country couple country singing ask right eye is sliding off of her face and he is not the man. I used to know whatsoever. I don't even recognize you. I mean he he'd be like you'd be like sir. Do you know how to get to the courthouse for me. You like what why. It didn't even say anything like it. I don't like it right okay. So now scan time so instead of just feeling so. He was doing this thing where he would go to the cadillac shins by the horse. Ride a bad check. Take the horse. And then they'd be like give us the fucking horseback you idiot and so it didn't work so instead he was like i'm gonna do. I'm gonna get hitchhikers and hobos minute bring them into the cadillac and make them by the horses and then take it. Has he ever thought of just getting a job. It's so much easier nail man. He could be a fucking hat salesman. Dentist okay so that didn't work bob blah. But then he was like oh. Here's a better idea a better idea. I'm going to pick up. These drifters and hitchhikers. I'm going to say them up. Paying money stay in my house and you. I'm going to help you open a bank account and get your shit together and you're gonna buy these california for me to open bank accounts for them and then they would go right. The bad checks by the time. They figured out those hitchhikers drifters. Were gone so they didn't notice from ray even though he always did that i don't know long time ago. Yeah on a little slower back then right. He got away with stealing a total of thirty two thousand dollars. Phony bank accounts of that checks. Wow until one of his victims gerald perkins is interrogated exposes raise. Crime phrase. arrested jail. Bobby when he's reese released from prison. He does the thing where he's like. Well now i just can't leave any witnesses. Oh so so. Then he would. He would call the ship and then after that he would kill them with a single shot to the back of the skull with twenty two marlin bolt action rifle once the livestock cabin purchased and sold off. That's this game. Wow just like they'd be like i'm back from the auction sir. Walking into the corral like all at their house yeah. I think at the house they would do. That are back at the bar in christ so this went on for long. Oh please four weeks twenty years. What's i mean twenty years until nineteen eighty-nine. Sorry so because no brag. But i was in the four h. And i showed sheep at the fair. It's one of my proudest accomplishments. And i guess he would go to different auction places then right because these playing they're getting ripped off even though it's random people like the. Yeah hobo that just took a shower and his hat replaced or whatever. I mean. they're not. Nobody's catching on for that long. Shit disappearing too. But they were drifters. They didn't have family looking for them. So right kind of a perfect thing Okay so then. In eighteen eighty nine fifty seven year. Old drifter named james mccormick is like. Hey guys i was just the shot and killed by those old-timey mike innocent looking old people. You have over here fan ray copeland and they were like we. We thought he was up to something. No good because they were like kind of on him at this point with the Check this guy escapes on any fucking skedaddle. Wow is the perfect word. The since this whole thing is like a weird andy capp cartoon for christ sake so they knew history so they got enough evidence to get a search warrant for his farm so they search firm for like a week and they don't find anything like disney on another farm and so they go sort that farm and that if anything just getting they a weeklong search okay turns up three bodies on a nearby farm in ludlow. Three corpses were buried in the barn shallow graves. They've all been shot in the head with a twenty two. They were identified as jimmy. Dale harvey. He's twenty seven. Paul power one and john freeman twenty-seven all transients who had last been seen working for copeland so young too i know and later investigators uncovered another court in the same bar wayne warner. Who's a drifter who spent his last month's moments with ray copeland and the final bodies. Dennis murphy twenty seven another one at copeland's businesses he. It's whose remains are found in a well on another farm also found that copeland home with these two it was twenty four names of farm helpers and the list has written by fiance and they find the right arrived the rifle used to shoot the men and five of the murder victims that faye had written had xs next to them. And it's each one who had been killed. She just fuck an extra mout well so she could keep track. I mean look. She's business lady so wait were. They people that they were going to kill. I think people that have worked for them at some point okay. Axes were the people that they had killed. So the five mar victims on xs next spring as did seven more people were never found. Whoa seven plus five is twelve. Yeah and i'm like who lives there right now. Go digging your backyard. God it's gotta be mcmansions at this point right dig dig dig really disturbing most disturbing piece of evidence that showed that faye was on the whole thing was she had made and handmade quilt out of the dead. That comes close. I wanted to be on your side. I wanted to be on your side. And that's the gift for the hometown. Murray and you have to put it on your bed i know. Isn't that disturb. It's disgusting. I know an insane. These people are there because they have three farms you can buy quilt material. You cheap bastards. Hurry okay so weird genie bays operatic deal if she can help find the bodies but she was like. I didn't even know when he was killing anyone. Oh yeah they were rain on five counts of murder on november first nineteen ninety say who sixty nine at this point goes on trial says that ray committed the murders without her knowledge and that she had suffered from battered women syndrome. But there's all the evidence against her like her fucking handwritten list with her handwritten x.'s. And the quilt in. Ah right And nineteen ninety. She sentenced to death by lethal injection for four of the murders like without prison for the fifth. So she's like the oldest woman ever be convicted or to be sent to death but wait on march seven one seventy six year old ray went to trial. He's found guilty of all five murder sentenced to death as while he tried to plead. Insanity was like bullshit. Here's you can't plead insanity when you've been committing crimes for ninety two years lake consistently clearly got over it at some point if you ever were and then apparently after after being convicted. He never asked about again. He never fucking acquired as to how his doing he was using her for sixty years. Yes so down by biting snappy motherfucker so although they were both convicted to ray died in nineteen ninety-three of natural causes while waiting to be executed in one thousand nine hundred nine phase to all these women's groups. You know argued about the battery women syndrome. Which is like we don't really know they are enough enough. I don't know you don't you don't know something. Terrible things were happening on that farm berkshire so the sentences commuted to life in prison and a she. She was no longer a threat into cousin to. She suffered a stroke so she is paroled. She was paroled in between nursing home in her hometown of harrison. Arkansas where she died of natural causes in two thousand three at the age of eighty three. And there's a photo of the five guys that we know where the victims and that is your fucking friends rain. Wow that's intense people. Farm south old people can also farm stuff. You know like that's well farms or like at the end of a long road set back away from people. Let's change things so farms have to be next to each other close to the road in action china all the houses actually real close and then you can just let your your animals. They do what they want back behind. Could we show you guys koto this. Oh yes before we. Because we're so were so in love with ourselves for picking this prize for the hometown. Can we have still of what it is. That's that's the this gorgeous jewelry box. Valued at twenty spin everybody. It's a box of candy shit. Nah fine who who's drunk. Your you've been on a roll here quick. Sorry there's been kicking the middle of the aisle. I always do that yesterday. I picked a pregnant girl in the middle of the iowa and we didn't realize she was pregnant. Goes hurry up. I was like pick up the pace rolling down the aisle lady. Ohi press everybody ritzier. Don't clap because you didn't get there. Okay where are you from. A little town called sedalia. It's like halfway home tonight. Randomly somebody from sedalia sitting right next civilias strong hill sweet good so long story short halfway between kansas city and state lewis. This is actually sorry story from saint louis. Okay for a happening right now. Have you guys heard of pam hup. We just did it. do it. Well if you guys don't know about this crazy crazy. This woman Worked in insurance basically had a lot of shady shit going on whatever she worked Became friends with this woman. Kind of lost touch with their until this woman diagnosed with cancer. All the sudden pm wants to be best friends with her again pm. Drives back and forth from chemo is really really clingy. With her gets made the beneficiary of her life insurance instead of her husband. They mailed the certified letter before it even gets delivered. her gets so pm basically pins it on her husband. This is all alleged. She hasn't been convicted yet yet. But anyway She picked a night that her husband was always gone. Stabbed her whole bunch of times husband does jails been the couple of years in jail stabs. Her fifty five lots of times anyways has been had an alibi the whole time. No evidence against him he gets out of jail in the meantime she gets all this life. Insurance money does not give it to the daughters. Which is what she was allegedly supposed to do with it. They asked her. Why haven't you given this money to the daughters. Oh well because my mom just died of alzheimers. And i'm very busy with that. Mommy diagnose timers mom took a whole bunch of ambien took it on her own and got tripped off of her balcony on our balcony. Broken and the people who investigated it said that a normal size woman could never have broken through the as she gets found on the ground outside their minute the day before whenever pm brought her mom back to the rest home where she lives she goes my mom's really really tired. She's not going to be down for dinner or breakfast. Don't worry about her go check. Don't check on these by. That's what everyone says about their elderly parents. Please please don't check. I'm paying for you So anyways gets ruled accidental. Not anything suspicious. Going on that time goes by the husband gets out of jail then all of a sudden they get a nine one one call. That pm has been a the victim of a home invasion. Somebody had gotten into her car. A held a knife to her throat. She ran inside the chaser inside. She unloaded a clip. Killed them with a handgun. Keeps happening wales. No anyways it turns out to be a disabled man that lives in a local area and they believe that she told him she worked for a television program dateline. I'm in wanted to pay him. A thousand dollars to be in a reenactment nine hundred dollars of cash in his pocket when they find his body sequential bills she also has a hundred dollar bill on her that is in sequencing events. That happens all the time. No big deal and then also There were like wait a second. I think we've got a nine one one call recently where a woman said that. A creepy ass. He picked her up in an suv saying that she wanted to pay her. A thousand dollars to be in a reenactment for dateline. She stayed sexy and didn't get murdered out of the car. They reviewed traffic footage and it was pm hubs. Suv's that pulled the woman in key postponing her trial she hasn't been on trial yet but she one hundred percent guilty. She could totally. I think he's talking earned. That was awesome so good. Oh my god you guys. Don't jump her intake you guys. This has been truly such a perfect show. You've been an amazing amazing audience. Thank you so much so lucky to do. This job can't believe all of it's such. it's a very. It's a very strange sensation to start this. Podcast in georgia's apartment with her and i talking casually in usually very inaccurately about true crime and to have it explode in this way and to have you guys. Just come and be this community that you were turning yourselves into. It is an amazing thing to be a part of. Thank you so much for doing this with us i i. it's amazing. Thank you so stay sexy.

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