Love and Relationships
Listen to insightful takes on love, intimacy and relationships in all their forms, broadcast on leading talk radio shows and premium podcasts. Learn how to build and maintain healthy relationships with loved ones and hear stories about modern love, romance, friendship and family.
What Exactly Is Consent?
"Were talking about consent and just for our listeners out there i just want to give a quick definition. The definition definition of consent is permission for something to happen or agreement to do something and this is what consent is not. It's when someone says no the absence of a no saying yes. While you're intoxicated or otherwise incapable of giving consent not saying anything repeatedly asking someone to say. Yes or pressuring them to say yes until they do and go. I was going to add to that whether someone says yes or no. It doesn't that's one thing but for people sometimes feel like just because you're in a relationship with someone that their bodies automatically yours win. That's never the case either
Why You Shouldn't Block Your Ex (If You Want Them Back)
"One thing that you should not do that. Many people do after a break-up which is going to affect whether you get your experience not and when you've been broken up with or you had to break up with them because they were taking it for granted or they cheated probably your first instinct is going to be to block them because you wanna hurt them in some way. Y'all still want to scare them and you want them to think it's over so that they'll react you try and get reaction. You're trying to do something. And so you block or you one follow on from whatever and as i've said before don't do that don't do that. You're cutting yourself off for no reason. You don't do that until at least two months have passed and then sometimes even beyond that. You don't have to do that really depends sometimes. I'll speak to a client. And i'll say okay you know what don't block them. Don't unfold them even though more than sixty days have passed because it suits that particular situation. So i have an email here from someone and i'm going to go through what she did was she did right but she could have done better. Let's say so that. I can better explain this process of why it's better to not blocked because as i've said again before when you've been broken up with your job is to do what that's right. Nothing absolutely nothing zero. Do not lift a finger and that means on following no blocking no one friend ing until it's time
How To Handle Combining Finances With Your Spouse?
"Is a really good question that we have here so this. This woman's said our money is all in one account. Now that's weird and we've been arguing about how to spend it. We have some debt. And i think we should pay off as quick as quickly as possible but he wants to put more money in different places. How did you guys handle combining your finances and this is such. A good question isn't finances over like one of the main things that couples fight about right. Yeah you've got sit down and create a budget like the budget help. Give you argue about what things should wear. And how but like you have to sit down and agree upon a framework and they are thousand tools to help you do that. Amy huge dave ramsey fan. I know steph has had rachel cruze daughter on the show. And i'm sure she talks through how to even do that. Lake may not my number one piece of advice. Get a budget
Did You Know Females Have a Prostate? Sex Educator Deborah Sundahl Explains
"Let's talk about the clitoral orgasm versus the g spot orgasm. How would you describe them. We'll first of all g-spot is the female prostate that female prostate surrounds. The re throw canal. It starts at the outside opening of the body. And it's thirty two ducks. Glands are sprinkled along the eureka three canal about two inches so therefore because you're re throw canal and the vaginal canal share the same wall that means you can easily access prostate through the roof of the vagina. You can easily feel it. It literally hangs down through the roof of the vagina. it's a prostate. It's not the clitoris. The clitoris is primarily erectile tissue. We have the little knob on the outside of the body. Full of nerves. But as feminists healthcare a nurse's rebecca shocker and susan gauge and nineteen eighty to redefine the clitoris. They said hey. It's not just the little knob on the outside of the body. That feels so good. It's actually erectile tissue that extends four to five inches inside the body. They thought these women were not strict. Fifteen years will now. They've seen this structure in the
Is It Possible to Affair-Proof Your Marriage?
"Ing what does affair proofing. Your marriage even mean. I'm laughing because you're told not because of the subject matter. I take really serious. But i think the tone of incredulity is probably well placed because after all. We can't affair proof our marriage marriages in the sense of making one hundred percents free of any possibility of affairs but we routinely use language like fireproofing or any other building or drown proofing our own children and it doesn't mean a little monsters can't be drowned if we really put our minds to it but it means that there are less likely to drown. They fall out a boat in the same way. I think we can. Dramatically reduce the odds of affairs just happening by grappling with the subject matter and taking some intelligence steps. But i'm over on the other side. I'm thinking hey if you don't want to be affairs in your marriage than don't sheet like in my mind it's a simple. The research does very clearly state that people who consider themselves honest. People are falling prey to this slow. Really when you think about it. Human behavior is the result of causality. Right it's the result of choice and people choose to engage in certain behaviors and some of those behaviors. Make it less likely that an affair will occur and some of course will make it more likely than an affair will occur. The problem. i think is typically. We're so uncomfortable with talking about sexuality that we want to reduce it to a moral diagnosis. And then say well then. Just don't do it. You know don't have affairs. Don't have sex outside of marriage don't have sex before marriage. And for god's sakes don't masturbate in fact while we're at don't even think about sex because that's the same too but if we embrace humor normal human sexuality that would include everyone having thoughts and feelings and fantasies and and sometimes behaviors. That are problematic and if we can just embrace that reality in which we live then we can we can begin to intelligently manage our sexuality
Being Vulnerable Is the First Step to Getting Your Emotional Needs Met
"When your needs aren't being met What we tend to do is we tend to tense up and we tend to hide behind either anger or harshness or nagging or bickering or complaining. But we don't do is we. Don't show our vulnerable side. We don't shower softness and this first key is to actually open yourself up and show him yourself side. Show him was actually important to you. Because when you're coming from this wool vulnerable space. It's a very different dynamic. It's not as dynamic of trying to push. It's not coming from a dynamic of being super needy or something like that and by the way if you're wondering how to do it without being needed. That's the next episode But like it is really the softness that gets lost right because you're coming from this discard place. So you're like trying to. You're only going to lower the guard if your needs are being met basically rather than showing yourself in the so that you needs canopy met and i know i just talked about how right now. We don't have that struggle at all to meet each other's needs but once upon a time we did. We had a really difficult time. We were very unhappy and we didn't really know what was going wrong. And within that process. When i one date actually opened up to you and happened to that softness which is the first way that were suggesting here to get him to meet your needs or if to fulfil your knees to tap into us. Softness for me that meant actually emitting to you vulnerably. What was going on emotionally. And that meant admitting doesn't mean you the listener have to do this exactly but this is not a secret formula. I'm just saying my way of tapping into that softness. When within our relationship was actually to get vulnerable it was to connect to myself honestly and admit how i was feeling and it is to share that with you
Where Did the Sex Go?
"Tell me what's going on thanks. I'm a huge fan of so happy. So i i'm a therapist always thinking always in my head but it can't figure this out. Okay i think of it. As like my my is spilling into my. I am in a healthy relationship with a man like seven months in and suddenly my fantasies of being with a girl sexually being with a woman is like suddenly moving into my daily life. And i go by the timing on. Turf big communicator. I've talked about it with him. I mean he. He's not like irritated by a bike. Is definitely not okay with me pursuing that. And i understand right but i just can't get my finger on why this suddenly like not just a fantasy it used to just the have dreams or that'd be the corn of choice by and suddenly it's like no. I want to do this in my waking life. And i can't get to the bottom of it. Have you met anybody. That's picture interest. I have not okay. How's your sex life with your partner. Our sex life is great That hesitation you hear. My voice is like i am struggling a little bit with the x factor like the while chemistry but everything is so great in a relationship and the actual sex is great as well in the communication until it's not something i'm concerned about but be x. Factors just the little though so for me. Okay how the x factor meaning dislike unspeakable chemical. I gotta have you right here right now type of connection that i didn't look my most toxic relationships honestly like thick the more toxic Stronger that was which is terrible and now in thirty and making smart choices. How long have you guys been together. Seven months seven months okay. So it's still do. How was in the beginning. Did you have that attraction. At the beginning we did. I don't know what we're off. i think. I don't know if is spending more time together than i usually spend with my significant other to be honest But it's died down a little bit and it's only seven months in. Yeah i mean. That's what happens in relationships. The honeymoon period is anywhere from six months to two years and then during the pandemic. Maybe you're spending more time together and that kind of squashes out the the the arousal and the attraction process because when we're on top of each other we're seeing to their more while we feel more intimate and more connection and more love with our partner it's sort of. Can douse the flames of desire. Because we no longer have that separation
Dear Prudence, I Miss My Wife’s Face
"The subject is. I miss my wife's face my wife and i have been married for nearly twenty five years and we're both in our late forties in the last few years many of her friends who started getting plastic surgery or talks and face villers. I was a bit surprised when my wife expressed interest but felt. It's her face in her. Perogative occasional botox injections which in my opinion look great have now graduated to regular fillers. I hate it. My wife doesn't look. She looks like she's had work done. She's thrilled with how she looks in any gentle comment. I've made is met with the accusation that i'm focusing on her appearance and not supporting her freedom to make choices. Basically that i'm anti-feminist. I loved her face when it moved. I don't wanna kiss her inflated lips this is killed our sex life but the other day fourteen year old daughter made a comment about wondering when her mother would start expecting her to get botox. I'm fed up and don't know how to talk to my wife about this. Yes i support her right to make her own decisions. But i feel like i also have the right to not like it. I don't want my daughter to think about doing this. As part of her freedom of choice please help.
Here Are Some Interesting Facts About Boomers and Relationships
"This i thought was interesting is one of the studies. Talked about boomers being less focused on marriage than genetics. and what. i'm curious about as if that's that more of a general trend for that whole generation or if it's just because now it's like been there done that don't care anymore or if it is more. 'cause boomers were also like the free love generation and so maybe that had an influence on the way they approached marriage then the gen xers kinda swung back. I'm not sure that that's an interesting thing to look at. I read a study in. Unfortunately i i don't have it pulled up so i can't exactly site it but that basically takeaway was that among boomers men who aren't like now again in the fifty seven seventy five year range and most likely have already had a divorce or a couple of divorces at this point men were much more likely to want to get married again and cohabit again and boomer women. Were much less. Likely i'm not gonna take care of you yeah that of the takeaway or the anyway. There's not a lot of women are like. I have already been there done that with like taking care of a man child and i don't want to go there again. Also a study about sexual activity amongst generations showed lower rates of masturbation compared to other generations but similar rates of other types of sex. And that's something that came up. Actually in a number of the studies was just that all of the generations are having sex and that really millennials are the ones doing less of it but just that that doesn't really decline as much with age as i think people tend to think that it does or kind of stereotype is so that was interesting that that came up a lot in these however the number of individuals who report actively dating does decrease with age within the boomers group which makes sense. If you think about from fifty seven seventy five years old. You know that. That's a pretty big age range and it coincides with like retirement like they're kind of bridging that gap right now and so that kind of sense that might be declining with
Is This Considered Cheating?
"If this considered cheating or not there. Stephen shirley i've been in a relationship for four years and my boyfriend and i live three hours of part. We've always been in a long distance relationship and i thought everything was fine until recently he started talking about marriage after we dated two years and he said he would gladly move to philly to be with me. I got all excited about marriage. I started preparing myself emotionally and financially to be with him for the rest of my life then. Last year he started saying that the distance was killing him and sometimes he just wanted to lie next to me and hold me until he goes to sleep but he can't because i live so far away. I thought that he would go ahead and propose but he hasn't. I started visiting him more but he made excuses. When it was time to come see me a few times. I didn't want us to grow apart so i did whatever i could to keep the sparks flying in the bedroom. I was visiting him one weekend and there was a towel on the back seat and i needed to put groceries in the car. I picked up the towel and it was this was crusty and stiff and i am no fool so i know what it looks like. I thought it was incredibly tacky of him to lead in the car and no matter what that substance was on it i asked him about it. He confirmed my thoughts. He said he went out a week. Or so before Before i got there and a female friend of his helped him out orally he said he didn't return the favor to her but she willingly them he said it's not like he cheated and it helped him out because he missed making love to me i was livid and all he kept saying was he did this for us. And it's not cheating. But i've never had a quick hook up with my male friend. Is this cheating or not. should i break up with him. Yes come on. This is really
Your Future Sex Robot Could Be Hacked and Programmed To Murder You
"My horror when i saw mike werner's piece at consumer gadget website. Bg are dot com with the headline. Your future sex robot could be hacked and programmed to murder you. The technology sector about technology ltd win rights. But there's no telling what the future could hold. Death by sex robot could end up on some unfortunate souls. Tombstone all right. I i wanna say good job. Biji are good job with that headline it addresses readers as a group that will in the future all have sex robots so it doesn't other people who want or will have sex. Robots in the future is not talking to a presumed group of default quote normal readers about all those freaks out there who will have sex robots in the future but instead assumes that everyone's going to have a sex robot at least everyone who reads consumer gadget websites which may be a safe assumption or maybe sex robots are going to be like colored. Tv's and microwave ovens the richest kids on the block. We'll have him first but pretty soon. Everyone's dads can have one now. Winter's piece hacked killer sex robots from twenty but it made the twitter around last week for reasons only down to the algorithms that rule our lives and will continue to rule our lives until skynet is operational but the premise makes sense. Our elections are gas. Pipelines are remotely locking male chastity devices all hacked in recent years so of course our sex robots are going to get hacked
Relationship Mistakes and How To Avoid Them
"Today's episode is about Relationship mistakes and december five relationship. Mistakes and i thought of things that we don't usually think of. They're not the it's not going to be communication or communicating better. I mean of course sure. But i'm trying to think of things that maybe different or fresh that you haven't thought about before or heard because i think that's gonna you know it's going to help you more so the number one is to allow the relationship to just go on. Its own right to let go of the steering wheel. I think that many people have a misconception that if the chemistry strong or if there's a good connection at your attracted to someone you know the more you think someone is hot. The the the relationship is going to be in that is not true relationships default to drift. So that means if you do nothing other than encourage the field goods and you know you. Make out a hut in the sexist grade. That's amazing But that's still will default to drift. Would it mean by that is. We are in our heads a lot right. No relationship is perfect and as we go throughout our day. We are analyzing jumping to conclusions. We are Catastrophes right lotta cognitive distortions. Were comparing our relationship to other relationships right so all of that is happening already on top of that. There's the the stress of life there. Is you know daily anxiety. All the shit that we go through individually and we're out in the world We're also gonna notice other people and be attracted to other people and that's okay too. It just means we're human. It doesn't mean we're going to do anything about it but just if you're alive you're gonna find other people attractive. I mean there's billions of people on this planet right
Economist Noreena Hertz Says Loneliness Is Bad for Our Health and Wealth
"And your book. You make an interesting argument. You say that woman is not annoying is not only initiative mental health. There's also Economics and politics involved in this. You know what do you estimate is the The four extent of this problem even beyond the mental health issue. So you know as as you know all too well that leninist is bad for mental health and that there is a link between loneliness anxiety and loneliness and depression and even leninists and suicide. Wilson know that lenses Physical health Manifesting in high blood pressure high levels of court could sell stress hormones in our body pulse rates all if these essentially not good for our body to be in a state of for protracted periods as loneliness often as many Which is why loneliness can even reduce our life expectancy by as much as Make our risk of dying prematurely Is much is said. He percent higher than if you're lonely so It is. It's not just health effects. Leninist is also bad for our wealth bad for our wealth collectively in part because if the cost the health k. bud healthcare bird and That lameness puts public health systems but also because leninists is bad for the workplace. Lonely work is less efficient s mandated less productive and more likely to quit company. The work as want that the single biggest determinant for whether somebody will remain at compute note is whether they have a friend at work so leninist really significant business program as well and also as i found in my research Inexorably linked to the rise of right wing populism in recent years. I'm not saying that everyone who's lonely. The populists of the right. Of course they don't but a significant katri if those who do lonely lonely in the sense of have more limited social networks much week support systems. We ca- ties with friends. Fewer acquaintances even fewer people to rely upon and times. If need but also langley in the sense of failing
Breaking Down the ‘Romance’ Phase of a Relationship
"So the romance stage basically you have these Goggles on that are filters and this filter filters out everything. That is bad about your your partner. See you only see good things about them. They're perfect and vice versa. They see you the same light so during this face. Everything is good right. This is usually at the beginning of dating. When you meet somebody new. You just getting to know them right. And it's exciting your The honeymoon stage the in love phased that they talk about in the five love languages. Yeah which by the way we we did have a podcast episode on that as well so make sure to check that out But yeah. I mean it's it's basically in the beginning of a relationship. All you see is good things about your parter or dating. And after the conversation you're giddy. You have butterflies. Do you remember what that was like when we first started dating. Link those feelings and did you. Did you think we were in that face. 'cause they said that in love phase or that romance phase is usually about a two year period. The first two years. Yeah absolutely the first two years were great. We were just travelling in just getting to know each other. Roofing is new new. I didn't know anything about you You know we spent hours on the phone every single day. Either on the frame chatting right and and just everything is exciting. I met your friends for the first time. Your family for the first time they just everything was exciting.
A highlight from Scott Petersons Sister: 33 Reasons Why My Brother Is Guilty
"Twenty five seasons four thousand five hundred sixty one episodes. I believe the oprah winfrey show was one of the greatest classrooms in the world Rolling never thought of it. That the moments the breakthroughs the connections the occasional ugly cry so terribly every single minute the l. o. Ell's the moments that matter. I o blue light lessons. Never allow them to take you somewhere. I'm bringing them back. It's time to open the ball. I personally chosen these classic episodes to share with you again. Every single person you ever will meet shares that common desire. They want to know. Do you see me. do you hear me. That's what i say mean anything to you. You're listening to the oprah winfrey. Show the podcast scott. Peterson's own sister believed he was innocent. Now she says he is a cold blooded killer. I actually never saw him. looking for. lacy scott's bizarre behavior when he saw your babysitter he was smiling and flirting her. Recent trip to prison to see him what he said about amber the untold story. You confronted scott details. You haven't heard. Why do you think he killed her. Next title. alone is chilling. Thirty three reasons why my brother scott peterson is guilty. Scott peterson sister and is breaking ranks with her own family and has decided to go public. today she's revealing. why after supporting her brother one hundred percent she is now convinced that he murdered his wife lacy and unborn son in cold blood. The world was first introduced to lacey peterson in breaking headline news. Police and volunteers spent the day searching this desktop car for all wooden Twenty seven year. Old lacy peterson lacey. Eight months pregnant was missing and her husband. Scott said he had no knowledge of her whereabouts. In the beginning both lacey's family and scott's family united begging for lacy's return. I know that someone knows where lacy is and i'm pleading with you. Please please let her come home to us. I miss listening to talk about her future with her husband and her baby but then came the lies and inconsistencies in scott story and the explosive revelation of a secret affair with amber frye. I met scott. Peterson november twentieth. Two thousand two scott told me he was not married public opinion shifting and the speculation that scott was involved in his wife's disappearance intensified after a month lacey's family support for scott crumble. Her brother brent was the first to lash out has not been forth coming with information regarding my sister's disappearance and i'm only left to question what else he may be hiding and they became to families deeply divided as the peterson's remain loyal to scott insisting he was innocent looking for lacy that exists whole purpose and he's continued to do that
A highlight from Jason Butler Harner
"Hey everyone and welcome to couples therapy. My name is naomi. my name is anne and we're a real couple a real life couple of comedians on couples therapy. We answer a couple of questions from a couple of listeners. Hell yes what a fun time and let you know. I'm feeling fun. I'm feeling funky. You wanna know why. Yes i do wanna know why because we've been living in hell in the last week because i did live standup last night. First time in fifteen months. Wow and i will say i have energy i like. Did you see. I unloaded the clean dishes on the rack. Those are the things that are still drying and notice that. That's our mabel. You must have a lot of energy. I walked thirty minutes this morning before. Who before breakfast okay. All the animals got all their medications. Everyone was fed. I was up in the energy. Is i think from doing standup. Wow i know it's not crazy. Yeah no it's not because you're an amazing stand up so sweet. I just didn't realize how much i have been missing that right and that you actually that like you know what i will say this probably like even though the last year has been a lot of like shows inside right you still. It's still. it's not the exact same thing but a replica. It's like a virtual reality stand up and so you have some of the same. I'm sure you didn't. You didn't get that rusty right. Oh yeah yeah. I mean again. I did a couple of things that were like older. Almost if i remember them but yeah it wasn't that recipe but i will say it was a couple of pauses kind of between the bits you know contracting it. Because i don't have like a list. I don't have a go-to set. I've been doing right but in terms of just like you were like you didn't get on stage and you weren't just like with the fuck doing jesus christ Microphone what is this is this a microphone is do you call a microphone. Well i got up lip the microphone and i wiped it on my jeans and like no one's and i was like yeah i'm the microphone. And then this is my first fifteen months. I'm wiping the microphone. Picks you bring one of our microphones plug it and you go. Nah you walk onstage. You the microphone off their you. Put it down on the ground. You put our microphone in. Well actually tonight gonna bring alcohol wipes okay that is not above it. I bring alcohol wipe. I will be wiping the top of that microphone down. I looked it up. Alcohol is safe. Because i'm just like that's the thing i was like. It was just being a room of people who were mostly unmasked like it was. It was eerie but then at the same time. It was like yeah. This is what i'm supposed to be doing You know. I just don't want to die to do. It is what i'm saying. I have a little pep in my step. Today it's it's funny. I said hell week. I don't wanna go into it. But you know mabel. Her chemo meds irritated her bladder. And she's been peeing everywhere. We got her medication from the doctor. So hopefully she'll she's on the mend but still peeing everywhere. It's it's a lot to deal with. And i i was thinking about this. I'm like oh it's weird. How like these strange shifting timelines with our episodes because we record them so we were all kind of about once and then put these intros. We do in a timely fashion right before the actual episode. So you hear like what we're going through at the moment of the interest but also then you hear what we had gone through a month or two earlier at. it's very. it's a strange experience. Because i'm the one that was in the back to them to make sure that there's no problems. Yeah so feel free if there are problems yell at me but like yeah when you're is so disconnected. Should we stop batch-recording isis. I don't think we cannot do that right right. We have very busy lives. But we're very busy and very important. Well it's true but it sounds silly to say it without making it a joke. Say we're very busy life. But yeah but i say that because we do get follow sir. We get responses to some of the advice we give right and so from sydney's episodes sydney washington a couple ago. There was a question about insurance and someone asked us. Should they get married to their partner for insurance and we all said nets not a good idea right But a couple people wrote in to give alternatives. We love and alternative lifestyle. Tell us and tell me this one comes from yasmine and they write hainan. Andy love y'all. I just finished listening to this week's episode where someone called into ask about their health insurance dilemma. If they don't live in california she she gave some information about california. And i didn't know if the caller did live there are not so. I'm going to leave that off. But they should go to healthcare dot gov and they'll be able to look at their options on the federal exchange or get pushed to their states exchange. If there is one obviously what is it. Called the affordable healthcare act is a huge mess but in some cases. Actually it helped me right. It really did help me right. I was stuck in like having to take the worst jobs in the world. I needed health insurance and that did give me a little bit of freedom there. I do know that it's terrible. For a lotta people but in my case really didn't have to marry me right away. We were engaged at that point though right so i would have anyway joking that you weren't forced to just right this is. My point is not often that my favorite podcasts. In my job intersex. So i felt compelled to write in. Love you on. Thanks for helping me stay a little bit more sane during quarantine and they work for an organization called health dash dot work. So maybe check that out. Wow we love and this other person katie rights and hey naomi andy love the show and you guys are hilarious. I'm curling listening to the episode.
A highlight from Secret Dump #51: "Natasha + Leggero + Feet"
"From california but natasha. You're not now i'm in atlanta as been difficult living without this sweet. Sweet thing me Yeah it's really boring boring for me too. I wish you were here. But because you're not we're not gonna let that stop us from. According podcast episode is not writing. Tasha is right. It's much as marcus. Aurelius said podcast is life. He said. Make love to your enemies. Vanquish your partners and podcast until the empire falls. Remember that geiger remember that. I love marcus aurelius. Every time i call you to talk to our kid. You seem like you're in way over your head. Sounds like of projecting. We're having a great time. In fact i wasn't gonna bring this up but the other day our child turned to me and she said daddy Said i don't need momma anymore. I was like what like. What are you talking about. And i just figured it was like folly of youth. You know saying innocent stuff on. You don't mean that. And she looked grab both sides of my face pulled me deep into her eyes and said i do mean i no longer need my mother natasha lazaro to member of my family or part of my life. It's better this way. Isn't that crazy. not honey. i know. I didn't find it funny either. I'm that's a didn't find it funny at all. I actually didn't give her supper for three nights. So i got your back. Just know that all right. Well it's nice to see you and thought you had something you wanted to talk about. Do i have thought the other day. You got to confirm with me whether this is true or not. Although telling me that it's true is gonna probably reveal when your biggest mom wife secrets or you might be about to lot the other day because there's a nanny that's helping out not with since you're outta town and i'm having i have to work and stuff during the day so nancy comes and she watches the kid she and i can go to my office and right kinda create sort of what i would call. I dunno genius level comedy stuff and also in a weird way genius level pros and she was talking to her about something and then i was kinda like checking in on me about some behavior or some you know with with our kid and i had this thought. I thought wait a minute. I bet. Natasha told this woman to keep an eye on me and to tell her if i do anything wrong and i was like. I'm living with the enemy. I'm living with a with a spire. You didn't tell the nanny when you left like i'm going to be gone for a on. My husband's a bit of a fucking idiot. So if he does anything dumb. No but i did hire a nanny who would tell you if she thought you were doing something dumb so what what was it. I don't know no. I did not tell the nanny to spy on you. God what do you think i am. I'm like busy kinda like micromanager. Every move i trust you a hundred percent. I think you are yes but okay. I'll believe you this time but you will admit that it was a missed opportunity for you to not tell the nanny to just give a daily report right. Not give me a daily report. I'm saying you should have asked her to do that. I did not tell the nanny spy amu- all right. I'll take your word for it even if you're lying toss speaking of what you clearly have going on with our nanny which is a secret relationship. What do you think should we listen to a secret or too high. So this is a secret French really fucking lazy and we were opposite. Schedules so we have a security camera in our house. It's in the living room but it points outside front porch so sometimes when i'm at work I checked to see like if you just watching tv. Or if he's actually doing something. Because there's times. I do all the work and the one time i checked in on the camera while at work and He was joking off. So i was like this motherfucker. He should be doing the fucking dishes and he didn't the yesterday like it's like i really mad nestling I never said anything about it. Because i was like. Oh i just come across as a cre- I don't know whatever so then. I don't know what compelled me to check it again. Like the next couple of days later but i checked the cameras again and he was drinking off again. At this time. I was like left net and more intrigued and like potentially turned on And i was just thinking that. I do where i'm kind of like peeping creepers time and i sometimes check our security camera because i can't see him but i can hear like the pornchai that he's listening to and it's pretty shitty stuff like the one was death like most certainly stepmom forum where like the mom was like. Oh you're so much. Bigger than your dad is Not super into that each their own And i was just like this weird thing. I do when i m after today I guess i creep on my boyfriend boss. He masturbated instead of doing chores around the house. So now is the implication that he should fuck her every day. I don't know i guess. The implication was that she was jealous that he hadn't brought that busted dick to her before he decided to take matters into his own hand. I mean the image. That i'm getting in my mind actually. It's like a one of those infinity pictures you know when you're in the nightclub and go to the bathroom and they have one of the mirrors neurons into the mirror and you can look down the hallway of mirrors and yourself for ten thousand images. Deep is like. I see this image on their ring camera and probably the daddy of ring is looking at him. Her jerking off to him. Jerking off to her. Jerking off to him ad infinitum. It's like russian nesting doll of partners. Not fucking each other but jerk off to each other yeah she. She sounded like she was kind of been dictated in horny. Oh yeah.
A highlight from Annaka Harris || On the Mysteries of Consciousness
"Today. It's great to have harris on the podcast on amazon author whose work touches neuroscience meditation philosophy of mind and consciousness. She's author of two books conscious. A brief guide to the fundamental mystery of the mind and the children's book. I wonder ana kaz also volunteer for inner kids. Teaching mindfulness meditation to children in skulls. Hannukah so excited show you today on the psychology to chat with you too. I spent we wonder about consciousness together today. How about it okay. Yes sounds good. It looked like there are a lot of interesting questions that came in on your twitter when you're newer consulting your crowd you have a lot of fans have a lot of fans and and a lot of people on my you know my followers who are very interested in consciousness and an surrounding issues which will cover today you know when it comes to consciousness. There really are a lot of mysteries. I mean we're not talking about like Cheese you know where it's like. Okay we kinda get the molecular structure of cheese like the molecular structure of consciousness and still not understand what this is actually at this point. You can't get the molecular structure mean. Hopefully some bryant ashur matters show. Yeah we don't have any of it. We don't even there yet. Yeah yeah well. Maybe that'd be a good starting point in the just talking between the soft the hard problem of consciousness. The soft prom cautious. Can you kind of just descru- too. Yeah i think it's usually more in terms of the hard problem versus
A highlight from John & Justine Leguizamo
"John leguizamo and his wife justin all we had to do is get in a cab and head downtown to greenwich village. It seems easy enough. We had the address but as we cruise down there block. And that's all these beautiful brownstone we could not for the life of us find number one. What it said on the building was eighteen. Fifty four eighteen fifty four little plaque fifty four. It says that outside so you think he's ten years before leaving. Yes sir yes sir feel knows this kind of don't play trivial pursuit with believe the rule. They will forget trivial pursuit. This house was just teeming with history. We've lived here about ten years house and is is it another family above you or do you have the whole thing. Our kids live upstairs when they're home uh-huh both in college. They're home the summer. So does new little garden in the back garden in the back that john takes care of. And did you remodel. We did a gut renovation. Pretty yeah we started back to. It was originally as close like this from eight. The one thousand nine hundred and like this part of the floor is the original for from you can tell by how beat up it is. It was underneath exactly exactly. We settled in by a window overlooking the tree. Lined street outside. So how did you guys read you. We met out of movie. Actually was in carlito's way and i was a costume p. a. and we met at a fitting. I mean the first time i saw it was it was electric. I mean it was incredible. And she's like the finest woman ever seen and then we started dating and then you know she said yes. Yeah yeah eventually said yes. Yeah if you listen electric for you. Absolutely i knew really knew immediately that we should be together was fitting i really did. Yeah so she was so first of all. He's sexy and beautiful but also at the same time she was like Like connected. I knew who he was from because already done mambo. Mountains bigger on and so i. I was working for the costume designers. I asked them. If i could go to the fitting and help was it was it was just i mean she made it as sort of a way and then it just so you had been married already was engaged in time that i was each other a long time before they started to police the subpoena you ever bury. No no i listen either. Refer to hit side children. Whoa yeah and six years catholic. Earth control was verboten. Yeah but it was interesting. 'cause i didn't get married till i was forty. And he said how did you know you know not to get married. Dodge do it. I said because i'm a female. You know guys think you know somebody else can take care of all. I knew i don't want i don't want to do that. I i wanted to be an actress. I want to study wanna travel and went to london and did a play. You know i was golden crow forward. Thank you for somebody even back then. Oh yeah yeah you met and got married much later. We had children. I so our kids. Our daughter was born in one thousand nine hundred nine. Why did would you start. You didn't want to be married. Or i think we have different reasons actually for me i did feel like i wanted to be married It just didn't mean anything to me. I always knew my whole life. I wanted to have children. But i just never really saw marriage as part of my life. I didn't see the point. It just wasn't a really sexy. Oh yeah like that. You'll raise the cat catholic seventh day adventist and then all my family converted to evangelists. Oh wow how does your parents feel about you. Not marrying latin. Was that a problem. Nobody land people. We don't have those issues now. We love everybody we want. Everybody tells everybody. Yeah we know how your folks so. I was raised sort of jewish. But i mean really i. My parents were atheists so they never said a word about it. I think they were so relieved that i had found someone. I don't know that they ever thought i really would. I was extremely independent and so when they saw how much i love john and how. What a wonderful man. He is a they never said a word about. They really accepted me. Like right away. And i loved them to you know it was easy major. Get married with the kids older and you felt. I think we're going to. They're going to go to school. And we'd have we'd have separate different names and all that stuff gets complicated for me. I've felt after nine. Eleven happened and there was all that talk. Like you can't travel with someone's not you don't name and there was this weird moment. I mean never eleventh made you really think rethink life and the values of in your values and so we got married. We got a country house. We just changed life a little bit just to just focus more on on the moments important moments in the family. Yeah family values friends. You know the things that really matter that really count at the end. I'm linda knees which is actually arab right and so people were talking terribly hard people so i found myself having to say well you know. I'm kind of era ebony. I couldn't let it go now. You have to you have to speak up. Yeah so coming from different cultures because you really did come from hispanic culture right. Yeah yeah definitely i mean. We came from very different socioeconomic backgrounds. But i think opposites attract for a. I mean i mean. They're just such a natural thing. What was your background upper. Westside private scold new york. You know my grandparents came from russia and then my parents were both born in brooklyn and my dad worked hard and exam so nice. Jewish was yeah. I went to feel sin. Everyone i knew was just like me and it was pretty small world. Yeah and then. I grew up. You know kinda get on in queens and you know getting in trouble and fresh air fund kid and then i started to find creativity as a as a sort of means that. Save me gave me a future and gave me a whole way of using everything that i've grown up with as ammunition in as an art as a weapon to you must be getting less to. I mean talking about it can't get. Oh yeah i was a funny guy yet. At the same time but i was always getting them to allow trouble. We could. I would shut up. Yeah i mean. I came at a time where i felt like we were incredibly visible. Even though in my personal life latin people were everywhere but they weren't in the media and and it still kind of like there was still at less than three percent of the faces in front of the camera and yet l. a. is fifty percent latin. How's that possible. It's almost like present day apartheid in new york city where the same number as white people and yet there was such a dearth it was just a desert of of our stories being told and i just couldn't understand that and i didn't want to perpetuate it so i started writing my stories so i could see my people even though i was playing them. All right when you say that you were living among them. You live in hispanic neighborhood hispanic neighborhood you know. My school was a black
A highlight from Squirting Secrets w/ Deborah Sundahl
"Let me tell you a story about a vibrator. This as you mimi. I've loved the me for a really long time. One of the first toys. I fell in love with. You could call it my first love. So if you've been listening to this show for awhile. Chances are you've herbie mentioned the as you mimi. But now i have something new to tell you about the mimi soft now when i heard what the soft i thought i love the originally me. What are they doing. But i tried it and my mind was blown. They kept what i love about. Their original meet the iconic zhou rumble deep vibrations. That allow you to really feel the vibrator more in your muscles in your nerve endings and also allows you to access pleasure points but it's also discreet. It's one of these quiet vibrators. You can't even really hear it. Plus it's got a great shape that can access all sorts of erogenous zones and it fits perfectly in the palm of your hand which is why love using it with a partner. But now with the mimi soft you get an extra layer of silky smooth silicone making even softer than before.
A highlight from Endless Honeymoon Podcast Live!
"Endless honeymoon. Podcasts live we are live hi everybody. How are you yeah. We can't hear you so it doesn't matter how you are. How are you natasha. i'm are we. Are there laugher. So we're supposed to hear. I mean we can. No one said anything funny. I know but the deathly silence makes me think it's not immediately my fault but in fact there's a technical issue. Well jim is our audience. What are you gonna do audience laughter. Natasha how are you. i'm good it's it's been a. It's been an eye opening week. What happened this week. Well i found out that. I am not supposed to flush my tampons down the toilet. Will you mean you found out. I thought that you flush them down the toilet. Look historically you've always thought that that's what will but apparently they're like really for your plumbing and you can't do that and and and most people know that. I wish we could ask the laugher in the audience if they knew that not possible because the internet is keeping us from true joy. Natasha how did you figure it out. It's more there's more to it than just you finding out. Well my friend told me yes and about it. What what was the confrontation. Oh they told me. First of all the plummer told me. And i was like i told the palmer house like we will hold on. Let me stop you there. The plummer told you meaning. That's what i was trying to get to the plumber told you meaning we had a plumbing issue and the plumber had to go down with. What like spelunky you can uniform and pick up like a glob of horrifying like bio hazard anyway. If anyone feels me feels like they didn't understand this either. I know in europe. They flush them peon. You can force them in europe. Well my friend who's from sweden said that she also didn't know that but she said but in europe you flush them. What do you mean your friend in. Sweden who is european said. She lives in america now and she's so she came here and see started. Doing she had plumbing eurropean way. She was armpit hair out. She was flushing are tampons. She was eating baguette and then she found out due to a planning incident that this is not the way this is this is i gotta say Opening for me. But i don't think you because i didn't know that you don't flush tampons down the tank. Isn't it if it doesn't come out of your body doesn't go into the potty. Isn't that the rule. I definitely didn't make that rhyme. That's burning man. Information does burning men knowledge. But you also tried to check me on hygiene stuff this week to be able to weigh in on this. I've been begging motion losses teeth for like we're all on i. Four years are loss. You flaws like once every fortnight. I've listened to it after every meal. Lost when i play fortnite and i play fortnite so i feel like my gun. My gun hygiene is in pretty good shape. Okay can lead you. Can we ask the crowd because moshe thinks so. Now he's starting to flaws but he thinks that if you get one of those little pickers that's the one thing in the back that you just floss everyone of your teeth with that. Of course that's how you do. It stopped me the other day. I have one of those. Little floss. Picks right those. Those plastic floss picks. And you and. I was putting it from tooth to tooth to tooth to tooth and the toss. What are you doing. that's not how you do it. Do you think that you get twenty. How many teeth do people flaws. And you want a new one in each tooth showing. Natasha doesn't she flaws tooth unravels. It and then re winds up to have a clean piece of floss to go to the next two. I flashed my maxi pads down the toilet. That's in europe only in your flush into the river to the river. I know you're not supposed to flush the maxi pads. But i do. I did thank you flushed. I wonder if anyone out there right now is learning this for the first time for me it would be. It would be nice if we could have. The reaction of the audience informing submit
A highlight from Lockdown Lesbian Love Story
"An avid diamond. My pronouns her she and her oh. I'm the lesbian. My full name is rachel. Corrie would and i go by her. She and out lesbian. Yeah how'd you meet met on an hens. And then we did. The first date was Zoom date because like it's pandemic so you learn really quickly that if you really want to spend time with somebody you're gonna go on zoom i So yeah we met him hinz. And and i think i'll let abby take it in terms of like how quickly we met it was very like we're chatting So zoom tomorrow. Night i'm like Yeah right to the point. I think also at that point. It's like it's kovin. You really want to make sure that if you have to quarantine for two weeks between actually meeting people it's very important to do that screener beforehand because otherwise you're gonna find yourself in a very awkward date and even more resentful than normal because now you can't see anyone else so yeah i was pretty and i. I didn't wanna get into a pen pal relationship with anyone. I had gotten into like a weird pen pal relationship in a very lesbian way with a woman who lived in arizona. So like i wasn't about to go there and yeah on zoom. I believe i asked her about seven hundred questions. It's funny because you touched on. What i think are two of the biggest tropes about lesbian relationships. Which is that lesbians are always looking for. Love always pretty much monogamous and always moving fast even though we know many queer women in our circle who have every range of appetite interest in different types of relationship when you first met on the facetime zoom day thought like over quarantine date. How did you feel like we're excited. Do you wanna meet up. And i guess like did you know you were looking to fall in love at that time I i mean i knew right after the zoom i was like i really want to meet this person in person. I really hope we have chemistry. Because like i felt a vibe on zoom but like when you get in person like is it going to be hot and heavy. Is it not going to be hot and heavy. Thank goodness it was hot and heavy. I mean yeah. I yeah but is it was like but it was. It was good stuff and and and so yes i. I wasn't necessarily looking for love. I was looking for a relationship like a quality like a wanted a term partner And i knew i was ready for it to of did all the work to be ready for that and and I was happy that like i knew. I felt deeply like after zuma. Like i feel a long term thing with this person and i. That's also why i was like okay. Intimacy is important so hopefully it's there and so when we did meet up in person happy that it was there. So an abbey. Where were you at the time that you were talking to corps added you know what you looking forward to do feel on not i facetime date. Well i think The podcasts interviewer herself had told me that it's okay to one you want and so i had I you know this covert. I think for a lot of people had been an exercise and you have a lot of time to think and you have a lot of time with yourself and ask yourself really tough questions and yeah i think you know i ultimately even though i did end up like hooking up with another person in the summer it was a very superficial relationship. I knew that We weren't compatible. Didn't feel a deep connection with her and for me Yeah a horny. Abby is is weird. So i've been i've been friends for a couple of years now and we met among your friends and so we have kind of that like you know gay men at brunch vibe a lot of the time and you were. I think looking for different kinds of connection was my sense at the time. And i think you're you know experienced businesswoman. So you were doing kind of like. Let me get a lot of dates. Me like schedule. Some things see who's out there see what's going on But it was my son's from our conversations that like you were looking for something more meaningful like you're sort of alluding to like maybe needing to get laid like lots of people in the summer but that wasn't necessarily all you wanted. What did it feel like when he met in person. Yes i think. By the time. I'd had my like summer fleeing That was sort of an eye opening thing for me. That like this is fine but i'm not looking for fine.
A highlight from EP 398: Weekend Vibes
"Ati has a watermelon. Black tea is almost equivalent at trader. Joe's one as good as far as another flavor watermelon blood anyway. Niro savvy long on my check in live your life just live your life. I'm gonna try to keep it short and sweet. Who is that the young lady on instagram sweden. Black what she say. Oh you're talking about Line easy yeah. She said it was her intro. Some black i think she got special coming out for the juneteenth. I think she partnered with facebook and she got like a poem or short lunch. I was late to find her because fire hyphen out about her instagram. Never mind so. We'll me nancy. I gotta keep it short and sweet and to the point. Y'all we had to give people some benadryl. I was working late. You pull them a little different hours at work in. Hey come on mama. Joe some role mabel. You so busy working. I had to clean a is. It does glued shut. I said what glue shutting down solo. How does it do both kennedy vote. Not let that shit. She got some wrong with the alleys. Michigan y'all you know she a poodle breed s. She always got little on a backer. And just so you know maybe a morning routine. She take supplements. She like her mom and her daddy. We believe in wellness supplements for all people and animals in the house so in the morning. She takes some allergy supplement. Desperate to help calm down. And there was other type of you take narrow take some cosa me for joints joints. Because you know poodles little toy poodles they got the known for the knees popping out of stock and so we ain't rated pay that bilious. Every morning. she'd be taken her allergy medicine in. Did she take her glucose. Amino as i was called for her wall. Then we come back then. We drink some ice water. Got is in. It would have little splash in her mouth. washington But last night they did it. And i was like what i'm supposed to do. You know i'm looking online. Got some advice they said. Just give her some benadryl. i said. Listen benadryl take me out the game. What is it going to eleven pound. I was nervous but everywhere. I looked it was there. They got a little bit hotline with insurance that we got her to the vet told her to symptoms cinta little pitcher and it was. Oh yeah look like. She just had an allergic reaction or some allergies this area. I said yes. Michigan is literally everyone cuts the grass near you talk about here by cut the grass area. God damned. I didn't get to you. Yes i was on the phone somebody. I started coughing inches out grass and got him on through in the back of monster. Maybe in some benadryl and what the dosage is supposed to be one milligram per pound of dog so mabel right around at ten twelve. So i'll say okay. If we get our ten milligram she'll be okay. But i was like dang usually you can just break it in half the people because use the appeals about like twenty five or so and give it to her but all we had was some baby benadryl but you not give him the baby or he has been unreal. What the die. And all that type of stuff. So i had to go find a benadryl baby benadryl with no dire. Nothing in it. That's basically clear fluid. We did all this. I'm thinking i'm gonna use our syringe. I use for her. Cbd 'cause you know maybe. I can see a lot going on. She got a cd oil that we give when she get anxious or when it's thunder on his fireworks but that motherfuckers only one milliliter able to give them a lotta dvd. But i mostly give her ten milliliters knows you know i don yet. How do i get rid of. Cd how she to narrow you putting it down her throat so they know misunderstanding in the. I can't do that ten times. I did it like twice over. This ain't gonna work. Do you not cook and open. Her mouth is poured may want waterboarding. There were going through and then we got a warm wreck. Cleaner is all that type of stuff literally in ten minutes. She was asleep. Me our was iowa. This happens on your own benadryl in on top of this. I ain't get off work the night before to. What about midnight on overtime. 'cause i actually a cup of water and i still ain't got it.
A highlight from 305: Understanding Divorce To Improve Relationships
"Hey what's going on guys. Thanks for tuning in to today's show. We have a different show for you today. Where we have. Dr carol hughes and bruce freudenberg on the show and talk about divorce and you may be like. I don't want to hear about that. I'm unhappy relationship. Which is probably your first response. But there is a lot of value in understanding navigating a divorce in unfortunately more than half of marriages end in divorce. So maybe you are a child of divorce parents or maybe you're going through a divorce yourself right now. There's a lot of value in today's show. And dr carol hughes holds her doctoral degree in clinical psychology in a masters in counseling psychology and. She is a two time fulbright scholar and has a long list of accolades as a marriage and family therapist and focused on family focused divorce for more than thirty years. And bruce has been a california licensed marriage and family therapists more than thirty years and is a board certified therapists in clinical hypnosis and a trained and experienced chronic pain management trauma addictions mediation and collaborative divorce. Practitioner and bruce helps families therapist divorce coach in co-parenting specialists and they are experts in this field and share a lot of great knowledge with us. And hopefully you guys get some great stuff out of today show yeah. Today was super valuable and like chase said. Even if you're not going through a divorce there's tons of helpful information on maybe dealing with friends. Who
A highlight from Redux: In The Shadow Of Damaged Parents
"Weirdly upbeat greeting. I'm always very happy to see you but the subject today. Not so upbeat. It's a it's a heavy one. Yeah we're we're gonna talk today About we call this episode in the shadow of a damaged parent and it is a really. We get such a multitude of letters that really when you boil it down has to do with. How do you live in the shadow of a parent who was in one way or another damaged and to what extent do we as kids. We're all kids of some set of parents. Inherit some of that damage. Is it inflicted upon us consciously and unconsciously and can we and how do we find our way out of that shadow and there are so many nuances to that shadow. I know for myself having a damaged father a question. I was always asking myself. Even though he wasn't in my life after about the age of six was will. I become like him. Am i in some ways. vulnerable to Some of the patterns That he he carried out in his life. That i think he repeated from his father and You know the answer to that is no but it took me some years to understand that. But i think that gets a lot more complicated when you grow up Spend your entire childhood in the company of somebody who really Does have some some difficulties in damages of their own. To see that the letters we're gonna talk about Are more extreme. But i want to extend our thinking about this to somebody like me. I had parents who were very loving and they tried very hard to be good parents and yet they were humans not gods. They were human beings and for example. My mother who passed away about a year and a half ago for most of my life. she was a sacred figure for me. And it's It really took me into my thirties and forties to recognize that. She was a very anxious person and very down on herself in ways. That were mask to me. When i was young and she was a depressed mom with three small kids at home also tried to do her residency and feeling completely crushed by her circumstance and by the shadow of her own parents. And i've realized really at the end of her life that that anxiety and self loathing is something that i carry inside of myself so it it needn't defined as damaged capital d. Everybody in their own way is trying to dismantle the unrealistic idealized version of the parent and recognize that the parent was a human who had flaws and chances are if they were present in your life. You inherited some of them absolutely so let me read this first ladder. Dear sugars growing up. My mother and i were great friends. My dad was never really around. He regularly came home at three or four in the morning because he had to keep up quote business relations. My mom didn't question it. Except when something fishy would turn up like handwritten love letters in his car. In any case they worked it out every time. And i didn't think much of it one day. My aunt borrowed my dad's car and found some diapers hidden in the trunk. My mom convinced me to hack into my father's email. I felt terrible. But what i found was devastating dozens of emails from young women. My dad had been unfaithful to my mother for a long time. He denied everything to this day. He claims my mom is just psycho. At first my mom was enraged determined to leave him but ultimately she decided to stay she began blaming my sister and me for my dad's -delity she said if we were better behaved and he'd had a better home life he would have never cheated on us. She also began to look different. She lost a lot of weight and she even got some cosmetic work done. She told my sister and me that we were not attractive enough to keep a man and she urged us to get work done as well. I'm no longer close with my mother. We barely speak. I feel horrible but myself for not being close with my parents. I've had only one serious relationship in my life. It was with a friend from my hometown and we were together for five wonderful years. I don't believe that anyone could love me more than he did. But i was so afraid of him cheating on me that i eventually pushed him away three years later on my current boyfriend. We've been together for almost a year and things have been great. I feel loved. And i enjoy the time we spend together however early in our relationship. My boyfriend told me that he had drinks with an ex girlfriend with whom he remained friends that night them she was in love with him still and it would always be even though she's in a long term relationship herself he's a very straightforward man. And he told me he had no idea she was feeling this way and he thought they were strictly friends. He said he knew he should keep his distance. That was seven months ago. But i know that he continues to communicate with her and once he hid it from me. He remains friends with several ex-girlfriends which i do not like but tolerate but his friendship with this particular axe worries me. She sends him birthday gifts comments on his social media posts. Even ones that. I'm in and continues to be present in his life as if i never happened. He assures me that. I'm the only woman in his life which i believe. But i don't like that he continues to entertain her while acting as if he doesn't in front of me am i doomed to sabotage this relationship like i did. My last one are my childhood experiences of watching my mom deteriorate and become someone to recognize affecting my adult relationships. Do i confront my boyfriend. My being paranoid because of what. I observed growing up signed. Never cheated on never cheated on i. I don't think you were being a paranoid I think probably any person would be concerned. That an axe of your boyfriend of a year admits that she's in love with him and we'll never stopped being in love with them and they're still in contact and it sounds like he hasn't been straightforward with you about the extent of that contact. That's concerning okay But let's put that aside for now your preoccupation with the possibility that you're not going to be able to put this in quotes here. Show keep a man is not just because of your dad's negligence. It is that. I think that obviously contributes but that triggered something even more insidious i think. Which is that your mother located that. Can that problem as a problem of female inadequacy rather than your father's negligence and cruelty and you know his his infidelity or maybe his weakness or his need to go outside the marriage and his dishonesty and she was so scarred not just by the betrayal but by her complicity in it that she essentially put that on you. i think that's really
A highlight from Tal Ben-Shahar || The Science of Happiness
"You experienced a career ending injury. Is that right. That is correct going. I remember when i was sixteen having the following thoughts i thought to myself. What would i be doing when i can no longer play squash. It was One of the but the central element in my life and I resolved to become a squash coach. Once i retired. Unfortunately i did have When i was twenty one almost twenty two. I did have a career ending injury in that in that me on on a very different but or was it a very different path. You know. I read some of these really interesting books. Like michael murphy. You know the founder vessel. And he's ran a book about golf. How can we transcendent experiences. You know. I'm wondering you know in your squash days did you. Experience inner happiness squad Maybe it's not as disconnected as we think yet. No you're right and i often think about. I don't know if you remember the book. All i needed to learn. All i needed to know kindergarten will at. I often think that all i needed to learn or no. I learned from the squash courts. So yeah there are many parallels in even the they're not to indirect links so even mine. You know my thinking about happiness. Today has a lot to do with my squash. Experience in bats actually generally not happy when i felt a sense of meaning and purpose but but i had a constant not in my stomach and i felt to stress and a thought that winning tournaments fulfilling no reaching certain milestones objectives would make me happy that i won a few tournaments and i was happy but just for a very short period of time and it was the first time when i when i thought about it. The dog wasn't formulated. But i realized that happiness is about much more than that just reaching milestones attaining goals than it was much more than about success. Will you know you didn't go directly from squash player to harvard. You also worked at a shipping company. Is that right as well. Yeah that there My first my first job during college in after college and the reason i got it was because the owner of the company was a squash player in incoming. I realized the later on that he wanted to squash coach more than anything else. But you know got me To to to do some fascinating worth can to stay in. I stayed in ended up staying that company For quite a few years and learning a lot. Because i spent a lot of time on ships and on shit you know. You're you're sailing in were cargo ships. So you're saying with a group of young twenty eight thirty men from ten countries as
A highlight from The Slow Drip of Isolation
"You're listening to. It's not normal. It's toxic hosted by dr. heidi dr. Heidi has been exactly where you are right now. She's walked through the fire of toxic relationships and is now dedicated. Her life to help others do the same living in a toxic environment can cause the damaging behaviors of others to become normal. Leaving you feeling hopeless and desperate learning how to recognize the toxic traits and understand why they occur. Is the key to taking your power back now. Is the time for you to gain your self worth because you're worth it. Discover who you really are because you're awesome and realize it's not normal it's toxic. Hey everybody welcome back. You're listening to. It's not normal. It's toxic rigid life of toxic people and again welcome back to the regular listeners. Thank you for sharing the podcast. I love that you are sharing it with people who you feel may benefit from it and for those who are new listeners. Welcome lots of stuff to listen to on my podcast. So i hope you do not get sick of me as you go through it One thing that we need to remember no matter where you are in your toxic relationship journey people would not be toxic to us if they weren't the people that are close to us. It's it's hard to take someone who has been in your life for a long period of time who has been an emotional investment for you. Who has been a time investment for you who you've poured a lot of energy into and then tried to label them as somebody who is unhealthier bad for you It's very contradictory in our heads. Because these are the people that are supposed to love isn't supposed to be the closest to us and supposed to support us but it's because of the time and energy and emotional investment that these people become toxic to us. You're not toxic to people who you don't know and people who don't really know aren't toxic to you so if you're just beginning to learn about the toxic personality or the toxic traits of of certain people were not saying toxic people are necessarily bad people. Okay you've been in relationships with them for a while and they've been part of your life you have to give yourself some grace because we're not saying they're bad people were just saying that maybe the two personalities have different goals and the struggle with a lot of people. Is you think you need to quit caring or you think you need to quit loving them in order to be able to distance yourself or remove yourself from that relationship so that it doesn't affect you as deeply and as emotionally and his detrimentally as it is doing now but there are ways to do that narrow ways to do it without completely cutting them off. I've been getting a lot of yes. But if i still love him are yes but what if i still care about her. Yes that it's my family. I understand all of that. It's just we put them in a position that they no longer affect us. And i think that that's something you need to understand. Because you know. I've had toxic people in my life that i dead that i do still care about. I've just distanced myself from them. There's other toxic people in my life that i've had to completely cut off and i'm okay with that because the person that i am is now the person that i decide. I'm going to be the because honestly if it's not working for you then that's the important thing one quick announcement and this is just for you guys to keep your eyes out for it. something that i have coming up. I've had a lot of requests for some type of subscription to my coaching and We've got that coming up in july. It's called the trickle effect. And i will be doing live. Coaching calls that you can dial into and listen I have a lot of different services for those of you. Who don't know the podcast is not the only thing that i do as far as toxic relationships. I do private mentoring. Do group coaching. I do classes. I do a lot of different things that can help you remove yourself from the situation. You're in and i have all different. price categories in the different things. So i've got something for everybody regardless of where you are financially.
A highlight from S12E19: Hacking Human Connection w/ Vanessa Van Edwards
"The dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating at the huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex on each episode. We'll talk about from sex parties. To sex droughts date fails diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves. I'm your host. You issue former. Dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer. Julie craft check s. We explored this crazy dateable world. Hello everyone welcome to another episode of dateable all about modern dating where we eagerly dig into the whys of people's behavior and this episode in particular is really digging into the wise people's behavior and how you can make that connection through hacking people's behavior and understanding. Why people do the things they do and people say what they say. I love ed are guest today. Is vanessa van edwards with someone that you eight. I've wanted for a very long time. And she's like the ultimate like her whole her whole existence and company and books and everything she's put out is all about. The science of people in her book is actually called captain. We have it right. Hopefully i'm hoping that this is how long we've been tried to get her on the podcast. I have the paper. I'm not even the kindle so it's the science of succeeding with people and all the stuff that we're going to talk about on this whole episode ensure the episode all of it. I love this stuff because it gives you kind of like those inner workings psyche. That like people are studying that the average person may be totally oblivious. To in knowledge is power and this type of stuff like helps in all facets of life. It's not just dating. And i have a confession. I'm so glad we had her on the show. Before i went to this wedding over the weekend. It is my first many more scale social event the last over year and a half i guess and it was with a bunch of people. I didn't know. I close friend from whom i met in beijing invited me but her friends are all friends that i've never met because her on her new friend since moving back to the states so i really had to come out of my introverted shell for this event and i didn't realize how much energy at took to just strike up a conversation in line. Introduce myself to the people on my table. I underestimated how much effort i needed to make. And i'm so glad that. I had her voice in my head for a lot of those conversations because i was like okay for this one. I don't to say anything. I just need to show interest. Just not show good posture. Show that i'm interested in this conversation. That's all i need to do. But it takes a lot out of you after a year of cocooning yourself and non meeting new people god. I'm really glad you brought that up. Because i think even the people that are like the most extroverted. We've been in like a weird social environment this last year. We're out of practice. I think if you've been in the saudi word you've at least got. It's a virtual practice but i think there is a definite real transition happening and i feel like this weekend. Okay so we are releasing this episode. We're doing the charlotte couple days earlier. June fifteen is like the big california reno day at. I saw the best tiktok that was like. Should we take the stain like. Is this going to just like this is going to be what's happening. Yeah but i feel like this weekend. I know it was like a little before the actual official opening but i think everyone has in their head like okay. It's company. I feel like this weekend. Went from like zero eighty four. I was diag on sunday. I was so freaking tired like exhausted. I think just everyone wanted to do stuff. I would say maybe it wasn't zero two one eighty but it was like thirty two one eighty because i feel like even social activities. I've been at have been like. Let's go to outdoor dining. Lets you know very chill and this weekend like i went to a house party with about fifty people ed's it was super fun but it was it was primarily outside still which i am still loving like. I'm just glad that like san francisco. I mean i think all of california's keeping this billick all the unborn dining and all the stuff is staying. But i will give a out to zach whose party. It was a long friend of ours and his girlfriend who i bat. Who is like. I recognized your voice. Listen to the no no his his girlfriend zak yes he does yes. I'll giving him a her because she's like. I recognized your voice because we listened to the podcast together.
A highlight from Hot Summer Sex
"Are we heading towards summer of sex is going to be the hornets summer of all time. Those are just some headlines in front of me right now obviously. We don't know what's going to happen but it is true that many of us have been isolated during quarantine. Maybe we didn't really date or we did date. It was kind of disappointing. And if you're in a relationship are you ready to get out of your house and have some fun this summer. I think that's the one thing we can all agree on. The sun is out ready to have fun. But what are we knew. What our sex life. How do we get more adventurous. So let me just lay down some stats here for you. Hinge one of the fastest growing dating sites says it eighty five percent of their users. Were open to going dates. As soon as lockton lifts half of their users already arranged real life dates and then in the same month. Durex announce a double digit increase in condom sales. We know what that means right. I think that we are all very very optimistic. I read these articles. I'm looking what people are saying. It's true it could be the summer. Sex people are talking about the spanish flu in nineteen eighteen when that we ran into the wearing twenties and it was just alcohol and flappers and a good time but i also know a lot about the human condition and i think a lot of us have our baseline if you were somebody who loved to go out and sleep around and that's your jam and dating several people. You're probably going to do it. Maybe even more so this summer but if you're someone who's looking for a relationship you actually looking for that partner. I say you this summer to find what you are looking for. So don't let the hype make you feel like you have to give in. I guess i should just date a bunch of people this summer. If that's not what you're looking for. So i asked everyone to take care of yourself and as always only you of the answers for what really feels good to you and what you're looking for if you're looking for a partner what's important to you. What are their values. You looking for a long relationship or are you looking for someone to have children with you know. Do you want to live with someone. I just think it's important to get really clear because sometimes we get out there and we date and we're like oh why didn't want any of these things that this person was but there are really hot. I'm really attracted to him. So hopefully you had time during the pandemic to kind of think about a lot of these things and now you're ready to go. How do you enjoy this summer of hot sex. I've got some ideas for you whether you're in a relationship are dating or it's a one night stand. Let's enjoy some hot summer. Sex so one of the first things which i always think about when i think of summer sex is sensation play. We wrote something about this in our instagram. And a lot of your like.
A highlight from Savage Love Episode 764
"Well i didn't see that coming. Which is more than jeffrey toobin. Former colleagues at the new yorker can say tuban is the author and reporter who lost his job after twenty seven years as a staff writer at the new yorker and was suspended from his side hustle as the talking head on cnn after he pulled out his dick during zoom meeting with his colleagues from the new yorker. Shortly before the twenty twenty election and had awake. But i didn't see coming was to return last week to cnn. In the most supremely awkward nine minutes of television since donald trump had to make his way down that ramp antifa and black lives matter smeared with grease on george soros as orders alison cammarata spent nine minutes. Nine minutes going over. What toobin did the decisions. He made that day and basically allowed toobin to plead inanity. Toobin made an inane argument. I'm not gonna play the nearly nine minute clip. It's not hard to find if you wanna go watch toobin. Says he wasn't thinking he didn't know what he was doing. He didn't know the camera was on but what he does now and what he does think is that he shouldn't have been fired for what he didn't know he was doing. And he went and worked in a food bank of the last seven months. And he got a new book coming. You know as problematic and unsettling bins returned to cnn. Was i believe him. I don't think it was intentional. I mean the wang was of course it was. Your dick doesn't fall into your hands during a work meeting but exposing himself to his colleagues like that. I don't think he intended to do that. But intent is hard to discern. And we don't wanna live in a world we certainly don't want to attend zoom meetings in a world where guys can get away with jacking off in front of their co workers as long as they create a little plausible deniability for themselves or reasonable doubt about their intent. Just saying i didn't know the camera was on. Can't get out of jail free card or an escape consequences for your actions free card but toobin didn't escape consequences. Tuban lost his job and he will forever have to live with the infamy which is to say i'm in partial agreement with its former new yorker editor tina brown. She didn't think the new yorker should've fired tuban. He embarrassed the magazine brown but mostly embarrassed himself. I think that's true. He did mostly embarrassed himself but he should have been fired for what essentially boiled down to sexually harassing his colleagues and he was fired. That said i don't think he has to go away forever. Some folks are saying to is only getting a second chance because he's white male straight and sys gender just as i don't wanna live in a world where men male straight white cisgender or otherwise can get away with jacking off in front of their co workers. I don't wanna live in a world where people don't get second chances. So maybe instead of arguing that toobin get a second chance. Because others non-state non white non-sis gender didn't get theirs or wouldn't get. There's maybe we should insist that everyone get a second chance like tuban and hold up as proof that everyone should get a second chance.
A highlight from He Says He Can Talk To The Dead
"Twenty five seasons four thousand five hundred sixty one episodes. I believe the oprah winfrey show was one of the greatest classrooms in the world Rolling never thought of it. That the moments the breakthroughs the connections the occasional ugly cry so terribly every single minute the l. o. Ell's the moments that matter. I o blue light lessons. Never allow them to take you somewhere. I'm bringing them back. It's time to open the ball. I personally chosen these classic episodes to share with you again. Every single person you ever will meet shares that common desire. They want to know. Do you see me. do you hear me. That's what i say mean anything to you. You're listening to the oprah winfrey. Show the podcast. We talk about books on this show and then books go to best sosas. That got the best list without any help from us. It's call talking to heaven and it's based on a man who says that he can talk to the dead. I know lots of you are skeptical of claims like this and may even think he's a fake you certainly are entitled the net pinon and skeptic myself and we're gonna be hearing from a critic little later on who says this isn't true at all but i. We were very interested. As i said in what happened at a session when james met with five hundred strangers. Many like yourself. Who said they wanted to make contact with their departed loved one. Sometimes he misses other times. He's right on target. I wanna talk to him about that. I'm also feeling someone who died in a motorcycle crash. And i feel it's a young man makes sense place. Someone sister here from visit your brother. Your husband died the motorcycle crash guy. Who gives you a lots of love pierce earing. Now thank you wear glasses schluesselburg glasses. I is there a someone who has a little thing in their pocket. Book bag of their child like a girl that died. Make sense to someone please. Yes she said to me. My mother i get very emotional here with her. My mother wanted a portrait of me to stand portrait of her with wings for made a rose. Bush rose garden. Wanted to put rose. Bushes rose bush famous garden for her in the backyard. And do church. He said it goes hurt with her and he said he was gonna pass over into it. I wasn't expected either with his cancer sort of cancer. I feel he's talking about plans for a house. Understand that and did you have like a blueprint or something where the papers being drawn up. And he said you like the windows or you had something particular to windows. This new house understand this. Did you write him a letter. After he died. Say yes or no okay. I'm sorry. Was there a pitcher. You have redone of him after he died yesterday. Gender stand so. You have the picture that you read that. He loves that pitcher that you have him. Well james prog says he can see the dead. He says that he can talk to them. That he can hear their thoughts and even feels their emotion than reading the book. You describe in first grade. Your first experience with wasn't mrs winder line lick wine liquor wine lick in the first grade when you first. I knew something what happened. Was she came in the room crying or something. I said your son is going to be okay. He was in a car accident. He just broke his leg but he'll deal right and a catholic school catholic school first grade and later the principal came in and she said. Can i speak with you please. To the teacher brought the teacher out and indeed this had happened and she said to me afterwards place after school. I need to talk to you and you said everything you said is true. And i started crying. And she said that's okay. It's you started crying because you thought you'd caused the accident and she said no. God gives certain people gifts to these things. And you're blessed with this. It'll you'll help people one day with. Tell me what you in your opinion relieved to be true about the dead first of all. you believe. there's no such thing as death. Correct that it's just a transition a transition because we're all energy and energy cannot die. We all energy energy means molecules which move at a certain rate of speed at times but the spirit body lies with the physical body vibrates at very very quick rate at the time of death. We leave our bodies and go to the spirit world. And that's what happens when they come back to this world speak with us communicate they slow down their vibration to a level that medium sensitive like myself is able to pick up these feelings and thoughts if they do indeed come back right and you just say they have to lower their frequency to come back right. Why don't they just say my name is jay so and so it would be a lot easier for me if they would say that. That'll tell you. And i lived on such and such a street and my mother was robin. So and so. And that was it because there are many factors involved because of the atmosphere frequency conditions have quickly vibrate. Sometimes it's hard for them to lower themselves and to actually feed the medium the mind the medium thoughts that that they can understand also medium might not be picking up correctly. I might not know how to interpret this stuff. I hear bits and pieces of things. It's so fast. It's so quick. Bits and pieces really fast. Sometimes it come through with really strong details and other times. I don't know what the heck they're talking about. Okay could they say my name is burke for example they have sure they have and it depends has communicate some more visual some auditory. Some more communicate more speak more. Don't go anywhere or to come after this short break you know in twenty twenty one. It's finally okay to talk about our mental health and happiness. Humans are meant to keep everything inside. It makes us sick and therapy helps. But what is there be exactly. It's whatever you want it to be. Maybe you're not feeling motivated right now and would like some tools to help or maybe you're feeling insecure in relationships at work not dealing well with stress. Whatever you need. It's time to stop being ashamed of normal human struggles because you deserve to be happy and now you don't have to worry about finding an in person therapist near you to help. Better help is customized therapy that offers video phone and even live chat sessions with your therapist. So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. It's much more affordable than in person therapy and you can start communicating with your therapist and under forty eight hours. Join the millions of people who are seeing what therapy is really about. It may or may not be for you. But it's worth looking into because you are your greatest asset. This podcast is sponsored by better health. And the oprah winfrey show the podcast listeners. Get ten percent off their first month at better health dot com slash oprah. That's better h e. L p dot com slash oprah this june. The critically acclaimed drama series. David makes man returns to own from creator. Terrell alvin mccranie and academy award winning writer of moonlight an executive producers michael jordan. An oprah winfrey follow the journey of david young man grappling with his past as he looks to make a difference with an opportunity that will change him and his community forever named one of the best shows of two thousand nineteen time and rolling stone. David makes man. The journey continues tuesday. June twenty second nine eight central on on one of the people whose work with james cindy cox who lost her sixteen year old daughter monica when twa flight eight hundred exploded off of long island in nineteen ninety-six. And cindy where
A highlight from Ryan O'Connell and Punam Patel
"Or open your hearts. Listen your butts. Talk therapy use suck. Not seamless we could have done better. But you know what we're rob were real reality are flaws all wards and all. Yeah this nigga where they can bow their. he's talking excellent and make with brunton cousinly. Too messy situations conscious coupling from netflix with lots to staple them with the blue tech sex regretful jubal bagel. You were eating therapy guarantee baby. We up everyone.
A highlight from S5E6: How to Step-Mom
"This brings us to today's story. It's a story britain. I know well because it's about somebody we grew up with. I'm stacey morris. Happy to be here. I went to high school middle school. All those great schools with meredith. And i'm a longtime listener of love letters and living here in beautiful psych spill maryland. Which is outside of baltimore growing up after my parents divorced. I was little obsessed with stacy's home life because it seemed pretty great. She had the most adorable little brother. Her mom was so kind and her. Dad was the coolest he was the son. At the center of stacy's universe my father huge personality and everybody loved that guy especially me. I probably would have said when. I was a kid who the person you most look up to. Who's your best friend. Oh it's my dad. My dad so cool so funny so outgoing. And i always wanted to be just like him but then high school happened and my last year of high school. I came home from school one day and he was moving out he was moving out. He thought he was going to get out of there. Before i got home. Nobody was home so it was a It was a surprise. I had no idea my brother had no idea. Come to find out. My mom really had no idea. Also everything kinda changed for me. Starting at that moment the curtains were drawn. It became real life. All of a sudden stacy's dad leaves her mom really. He leaves the whole family for a while. He remains that cool dad to stacy but then he starts a new life with someone else during her college years while stacy is struggling to pay for school and figure out life he bails entirely. There's no school loan. There was no money for college. There was no place to live. So i started trying to figure that stuff out and then he pretty much just dumped me at this point. Her dad is no longer the person. Stacey most looks up to not even close in fact when stacy begins looking for a romantic partner as a young adult. She wants someone who's nothing like her father. So i kind of had this preconceived notion that i needed to be with someone who quite honestly lacked charisma and was more serious about life and relationships serious in the way that i would know that this person was going to be loyal by the way they acted and it didn't matter if they didn't remind me of my dad because that was gone. That was completely ripped out from under me and threw me for a loop. I didn't want to repeat history. I was just trying to latch on. I don't wanna say to anyone. But i met this guy at this job. Who was also hustling and trying to make it and we decided that we would make it together. Stacey twenty one when she meets this very predictable consistent man in together almost immediately eventually get married. She feels safe. They're loyal to one another and good friends. She says he's a good guy. But it's not exactly a fairytale romance. I just kinda realized. I wasn't really in a relationship like i thought i was going to be. When i grew up was in a very unromantic relationship there was not a physical relationship happening with this man. And you know you look at yourself in the mirror and you go. I'm i'm twenty seven years old probably is good as as it's gonna get here. What's what's wrong with me right. And then even the predictability goes away. He starts retreating from her at one point. He actually bought me a couch and a dog and he said. I'm going to be here on this couch with this dog. And you're going to be over here on the couch with this dog. It's perfect and it just really scared me.
A highlight from "Chosen Family" with Michelle Buteau
"Husband yes towards a child presence makes the heart grow fonder so today natasha. We did back to back. Podcast tapings and she's got a hot hollywood luncheon today and then she's gone then you're gone. I'll be back. yeah for sure. I am concerned after this podcast. Though you will be we will be doing for at least two podcast where you will be. You'll be the one on zoom. Maybe i'll have guest. Come here and sit with me on the couch. that'd be killed. should i have. I dunno neighbor. Maybe chelsea neighbor chelsea or neighbor nick. Yeah remember we'll find out if we have any other neighbors. You know what. I mean like just random. Non comedian neighbors. He could ask the tiktok neighbors. That would be kinda funny. Do you think that they would come do it. No you actually. I think they would. And i think it would be a bad idea you so you don't think i should do it well. I just think that they're really attractive. Oh you're scared that they would be unable to resist me Maybe the opposite honey. Don't worry i think you'll be okay. I have some self discipline and self control. well listen. I don't know who our guest is going to be. But i can tell you who our guest is is today. I'm so excited excited. A wonderful comedian itself funny. So we've known for forever but who's had just a phenomenal year. This year she is the host of the circle on netflix and have dropped a hot special this year. The one a critics choice award called. Welcome to bhutto pia. And she dropped to hop baby to drop the hot baby. Michelle bhutto michel. Don't finish your breakfast breakfast micheals lunch. It's just mac and cheese left over from their lunch. How i i know that we both had like fertility journeys and like i am so happy that you have two. Babies grow to those twin children. They are twin children. Dron i gotta be honest. Those kids are so cute. They look like a default background phone. Don't they look like her but there they are darling. And i'm so happy for you. Because i know i know it's like it's it can be hard and I just remember talking with you a little bit about it and you know. Sometimes you don't think it's going to happen. And i'm just so happy for you. It was crazy. 'cause i think everything we talked about was light kind of peripheral like fun comedy stop. Can you believe we're doing this show. And these are the snacks in the green room. And then you're traveling with needles and just sticking for gesture on your coochie on stage. I remember like were there for your like. You had your really cute you out with you and you're like i have a hard talk yes assistance. Pick the ugliest one. It was just the one closest to me. I have a question for you. we've just gone through this hell escape of a year but you had like kids. You had a one and a war award-winning netflix special. You hosted a huge show on netflix. Is it difficult for you when people are like this has been the worst ears to not be like actually killed it so hard was still you know. Originally it was named mike comedy special good ass year because i was having a good as year. Two thousand nineteen outside. What a great year and the special in twenty twenty quickly. We were like this is horrible. I mean there are so much death but yeah it was. It's it's good. I'm not gonna lie. But it's still stressful. Because i can't go out anywhere and people are just dropping like flies link. What is this and so it wasn't is dropping a special because then people are like. I have similar forward to. Because i i was like who wants to read my book and watch my special when there's lack lives matter asian hitters all these things we have to get to sort of like unpacked but people were like enough with this election for two minutes. I just want a joy watch something instead of hate. Watch the news in. So i had to find my place with it. Sometimes you know doing communist two thousand one like i'm so used to rejection. I'm like you have to learn how to live in it. You know and. I saw this quote one times. A call on a positive kooks account quote accounts on instagram. Just because it helps my favorite thing about you know about you. But the power of positive thinking. I can totally relate to that especially with all the all the knows that you get being an actress and being stand up and it's just like like you said you have to live in this rejection. It just becomes. Being a hollywood is fine football. Oh enough already with this stuff. Do you know how difficult it is to be a white man in this industry. God let me just talk about that for a while. So what was the quote. The quote was the tools that you need to survive will not be tools. You need to thrive. I mean that was with parenthood. That was with also you know putting out content. That people like there was like who is this success comfortable. You know right. There's a lot of comedies. It's like looking people start looking looking. It's funny to the moment that they start looking at the moment. You become uncomfortable with the looking like before that you're like all i want is to look and then the moment turns you like none. None look the other way. Look the other way stupid though. So explain the quote so if the qualities that you need to survive your in survival mode than one year. Something amazing happens. Let's say how are you gonna live in success. That's a totally different thing. Yes so how do you live in success and it could be something bad. That's happened to you right lake. I feel a jury parenthood. It was a lot of trauma in so for the first year of their life. I'm like are they going to die. I know what it's like when a kid dice olympic. What happens when gonna die. Like i didn't sleep. And i couldn't enjoy anything and my husband's like all. She just burp them. Like are you sure. Are you sure that was in so much. Does this remind you of anybody. Know you're making you're blowing my mind. Honestly michelle right now. Because it's the first time i've ever had the thought that perhaps our difficulty getting to our child being born is a part of why you're you are have such worry around that i worry too much. That makes so much sense because it was so precarious for so long that now that she's here it's like it's not like it's more precious but it's more it feels like that precariousness still exists. Even if it doesn't even though she has all ten fingers and toes which was something i obsessed about. We have to keep them. They're so small so small to feels like you could lose one so when i was growing up my friend's sister. She rolled up the window. The the electric window in the car and the kids finger broke off yet. Like the last third of it just saying it can happen. Yup i feel like i've seen a csi episode. Where like you keep it on ice to put it back. That's what that's it. The tools that you need to survive or not the tools you need. To thrive the need to thrive are some ice and a suture kit to so the tip of finger back on a baby. No i really liked that.
A highlight from EP. 397: I am going to turn into a fried catfish
"Walking black lives matters with this. Sars is their possession for figuring out adulthood or breakfast. Michelle say who is you. i'm married. I'm niamh and this is episode. Three ninety seven y'all Easterly one two three four five star rating and reviewing up a park offering social media at black bluff matters. That's black when okay. What's going happy. Monday these mondays team sneaking up. Now you own the five minutes smoke we our lunch. Break the thirty minutes to fifteen. Now i'm onto you know. Do smoke breaks. I'm just outside the door. Would it cracked. And they're gonna call me if they need me time. Meet move fast as hail. We all need a long break. We ought a month. Like i literally be thinking like the scam of it. All is not kobe that we work forty hours a week just to pay bills just work forty hours a week for just go to outer space. We're talking about it. We're talking about jewish. We're talking about jeffrey later on and then don't mistake say. Don't don't mistake. My disdain for jeffrey going for space is that i don't want to explore outer space and nassau at bullshit but it's not necessary for him to go that is not appear that is not a priority. These moments workers are killed. A fucking rich bright. Like what is i. The generation is these other time power generation before to taipa. Babies will be like not anti niamh cute rich idea. Why also violent august baby. I think his. Oh my made it even worse be like. I don't know what he thinks. well done. i don't know. But i just wanted to put that out there. But the children will all come on the rich. Either gotta eat them like owned by non iams you street. Eat the it now with them. Eat the fucking rich play to shooting are fucking face. Natives can't afford would in jeff is going up there playing with the martians. You kidding me. When i go. Art is ghetto but one of the positive things helps my weekend. It was nice. We did like a little backyard. Barbecue will someone's birthday and they had a little birthday celebration in our backyard and it was so nice because it was warm it was open air in the majority of the folks who came already. Bet i'm vic vast energy so you know. I felt more comfortable being outside and around people whenever have events outside though i always feel so much better but more so than that it just fell nice to do black community stuff like i just realized how long since we really engaged even prior to covy like come on california come on a white asked new england. Come onto the front of the congregation. I'm talking about y'all it. hard to do. Let communities shit in california. There's a couple friends that we had in california a handful of friends. We had a new england but it just was not the norm where i think in the mid west in the south doing black community shits like back Shit like backyard barbecue in buying volts over. If you just cook sunday dinner normal