Episode 172: We Got Him - The Tommy Kahnle Interview
seriously time to wrong one you just. What's what's happening. Welcome to our mission of the short porch presented by Miller lite during this time of social distancing connecting with friends and were beer today looks pretty different role doing our zoom chats and our you know zoom happy hours. We're doing that with Miller Lights. The original light beer. 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Celebrate Response Leave Miller Brewing Company Walkie Constan Ninety six calories and three point two cars per twelve ounces joint here with Mari. Mush Tovey smokes. Tj the ones the twos fellows. We opened the show with some pretty sad really shocking news to me at least Hank Steinbrenner Cohen or the Yankees Chairman of the of the board. He passed away at the age of sixty three this morning. Reporting on a Today's Tuesday Pass Away Not Corona virus related. He had a long term illness that kind of makes a little more sense anything about because he stepped away from public viewing for what how really became the face of the organization over the last like four years. I WANNA say but Yeah Hank had. He's been battling some illness. Some people are saying it's liver related passes away the age of sixty three truly shocking terrible. Like my jaw legitimately dropped opened up. Saw The tweet from the New York Post devastating stuff. Obviously you click on it and and nowadays you're automatically assuming own help corona or whatever turns out not growing related at all. Yeah like you said definitely makes sense because there was a time I feel like in the late too late. Two thousands like that first decade where he was like you know very like much the face in the voice and like going to be the new George or whatever saying a lot of stuff and yeah then turns out he had this illness and miserable or thoughts and prayers the entire Steinbruck family Yeah really shed This is the worst part like is right. Now it's probably. They're not going to have like a really ceremony sharing yeah. I didn't even think about that. Fuck like funerals and all that at sucks virtual on stuff out of the how you doing. He supplement would have a huge turnout. Obviously yeah for sure. Yeah at you put it perfectly like kind of like the late. Two thousand two hundred eight. He really became like that face of the like you know he was. He was the next George like he would say like he kind of just didn't give a fuck what he said like albums more reserved and calculated. How and Hank would just come out there and be like you know He. He has quote about the Red Sox. it's alway going anywhere in America. And you won't see go anywhere in. America. You won't see Red Sox hats jackets. You'll see Yankee hats jackets. This is a Yankee country. I got just like he said those types of things he was kind of like a quote Karl a time This is a really sad. I I WANNA say the did you see John. Hayman's tweet now. That was weird. He he tweets you know how like when a trade happens like a big signing and like he gives credit to people he tweeted. I report on Hank. Steinbrenner passing Joel Sherman. That's a weird. That's like a toned our entire tweet the entire tweet. That's so fucking weird. That's odd like yeah. He does do which like all right. Fine you give credit for a big scoop traders or something. That's not something where like Joel Sherman was. Hey I need credit for this. No no Oh my God. Yeah and he does that a lot. It's almost like he doesn't even break news anymore. He kind of just feeds. Boris quotes. Like out to the world could Borcelino his guy and then he'll be like. Oh Yeah. Buster only reported this three hours ago. Just catching up on credit. That's his John Hayman's I kind of love. That's kind of a sick job. He does nothing. It's amazing he's easiest. Job in the world dislike report. The news that you heard from a friend hours later too. It's like Oh just catching up. You're just catching all the time. Just catching up your on this date. but yeah very sad news. Our thoughts are with the steinbrenners. Robert Malloy obviously Friend of the program and all that Can't imagine having to go through this you know during the quarantine all that just awful Another death unfortunately. We had to talk about real. Quick is Anthony Causey. He was a famous near New York City sports photographer for the Post. And it is crazy. You go through this guy's instagram. And what he is responsible for taking pictures like he has he has the Derrick. Jeeter the most one more economy pictures INC Yankee history. Where he's through this the depths of the Yankees of old Yankee Stadium and he hits a sign that says you know. Thank God. Make me Yankee. It's just like He. He was there for all of these moments and Yeah he he passed away with Corona virus. This was two nights ago And you the sports world everywhere just coming out with their tributes perspective on NBC. The other night I think syndergaard had one Pretty much every beaten beat writer out there. A lot of New York athletes were like touched by this guy. Very Sad He seemed like a legitimate good. Do this one actual picture of This couple in central park random couple who The Guy Proposer and causing just walking through central parking photograph. The whole thing came up afterwards. It was like Hey I took these professional shots. You guys like you want me to send it to you and just did that. That's the kind of guy. He was pretty cool last picture on instagram. To is so heartbreaking. Oh yeah his candidate in the hospital bed with the mask on say never thought I'd get something like thought it was indestructible by. Do make out here. I promise you this world's not gonNA hit Was March twenty second just devastating fucking diseases real viruses real taken seriously. You could feel like never going to beat it. Just stay inside. You gotta go outside. Wear a mask wear gloves. You can never be too careful. It's just like hits you everywhere. The numbers starting elite level off a little bit looks like in the city. But it's not you know we gotta keep going keep pushing because otherwise it's going to go back so we got to really hammer sir. Really sad news in the empty causing thing for sure Switching gears a little bit lighter note Obviously you're listening to this Tommy Canley is coming up Long-awaited interview We finally got him. It's about an hour long and it's fantastic of for against that Canley has been doing Streaming he talks about this on the shop How economy has been running a twitch stream to the audience of like five people up until a few days ago which is crazy because he doesn't have twitter instagram nothing. There's nothing last this information to so he's just been streaming and doing this thing. He was playing with weight and judge the other night. They're in. They're playing call duty and then he will show. I hopped on the show with him. We played a few games I guess it was a bad sign when I beat him With and he was pitching himself That was the bad omen for things to come later because he does play. He plays in the show. He played it on Monday. Night am when owned four and it was not great so People were not a little bit for sucking on the show. It's it's a tough game. This game is very hard glitch. Ian Shit so really. Wasn't that good right. Yes he's gotten there he thought he. I mean I stake so I guess. I'm not a good barometer for anything. But he looked like he he can recognize pitches. Hit he just. Can't he pitches with I don't know how many times because play video games but He uses the camera angle behind the pitcher when he pitches. I always like to hit like the the the catchers you and all that he pitches behind whatever I would do games. I always if I was pitching I. I would have that year that he does. I can't do all right. Yeah I just. I don't know that's just not. That's not how a lot of people don't very few people do that way so two. Can't we stick an shots? Okay I think MATT IN HIS GAME. I watched him play in the madame playoffs. He Played Wade. I mean it was because he talks about in this interview. How like one point? He rattled off forty guys on his mat and roster. And it's crazy it's like I don't even know that many people like on a normal roster like the packers I feel like a lot of people know and he just rattle off like fifty names on his fantasy drafted Madman League roster of but he's he he might actually get hired after like he's done playing baseball to be like an NFL coach because he reads defenses. He literally calls out what he's about to do. And he's just destroys people. Wade had weightlossforlife forty deaths. And like you probably have been more commonly says he lets up on people so Ganley's Gallison must watch. Bso We have the interview coming up for you now And it's about an hour long. Tommy he was able to join us. the full video up on Youtube. I think in like a day or two to go. Check that out After this so you to give us to use their But yeah. I mean you can't leave was great guy saw about the interview about the. I thought it was everything we could ask for. You know he's knee is advertised. We've basically talked about him on every single episode Till now or finally able to get him instead of asking people questions about McKinley. We're like hey we could just ask them ask them ask them to him ourselves He's amuses Dawson. Yeah I literally thought I was interviewing myself the entire. Yeah you guys scream brain or he just doesn't care and like he just is really good at baseball. Yeah the whole the whole drive yourself doesn't care and is really good at baseball. That's exactly how I describe. No He's he's in type of personality that baseball needs to hone in on and like get out there for the world. So we're doing our part here by getting on the show here Baseball really needs to make toffee county like a superstar because his personality can make the sport popular like instead of having announcers complain about. How Long Games are Jessica Mendoza? And all that we can have people. Just talk about Tommy Canley. And he will like that so So we'll get into the interview now for that. I WANNA talk about Hawthorne. Honestly while we're in a situation where I don't really want to go to the grocery too much or you know get supplies you wanna stay inside as much as possible. Hoffman. Hook us up and it is one of the best things I feel like. This ever happened to me. They sent me Deodorant deodorants all time. I actually but the moment they sent me. Children ran out. I've got shampoo for them. I got conditioner I said that really. We're conditioner condition. They've got face lotion. They've got handle. It's just when everything you need to. Just be yourself in your house and stay. Cleanest cleanest can be so positive going to sell it snows. It's not just like the convenience of a to it actually smells good and makes the makes you feel like a man it makes me feel like a real man for once in my life and I just got my like I got a shipment rape before quarantine started so like. I'm good for awhile now. 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Promo Code Porch to get ten percent off your Dot Com and that was without further. Do the best person I think the best interview. We've had on the short porch Tommy Campbell. All right we're now joined here by a little bit of a white whale we've been chasing for about a year and a half on this podcast one of your favorites relief pitcher number forty eight time. He Canley Tommy. How's it going man? Good man doing great hanging out here. Great stuff what has quarantine life been like for you. How close is your wife? Did just being driven insane by you being around so for me. I think it's been great. I mean this is perfect for me. All you gotTa do is play. Video Games Watch. Tv stay inside. The only time relieve is to go outside or something that's about it but yes I feel like she's ready to just probably choke me by now with all the video games at playing What kind of video games do you play playing a lot of madden lately and I have dabbled into the show a little bit? But I'm pretty. I'm pretty terrible. Show I did once and it was pretty cool. I couldn't throw strike. Oh you're you're easily my favorite guy us you over Chapman. Your is pretty show. I don't know if you know that read. I was eventually I got to a point. I was just started showing up every time I came fast offers strike miserable. Well that's like the same as you're doing the live EP. Talking with saying he faced your lobby he just gets like five changeups in a row from you so the other ones I caught. I play a lot of cod with brick. So we're on their murder and a lot of people. It's fun you played zone so we not the war zone though other one. I think it's blood money now was playing right for. Yeah for some reason. Last night I had a game. I'd like twenty four kills. Going fucking shit overnight. Call Duty Player on the team or is there someone that gives you run for your money? We may see currently I would say probably yes now before it used to be Tarp was pretty good Tarpley. Okay yeah he was pretty legit but we have one of our assistant clubs. He's he's fucking nasty. It's gross. I've never seen a player like you to my life Nikolai Have you ever thought of doing like a twitch stream like doing? Yeah I do have it. I basically like stream every night. Don't realize Oh yeah they have no idea like any social media right like I like. I feel like you're an outgoing guy in person. Like why do you not do the twitter instagram with all that? I don't know just I guess my rebel. WanNa be the rebel guy. Just rebel against it. I feel you would be probably top-five. Mlb Twitter's if you let it loose. I don't WanNa get one just in case Rally a good idea. It's probably going to do. We don't have anything so we are you willing to release. Which name is you? Keep that a secret? Nah I'll I'll let you guys. I actually changed it recently. So people could probably find me better. It's just tikan forty eight. That's it very interesting. My show one of these days were. I'm about to be in some crazy. Thirty Person League coming up here shortly. I'm going to be trash to show. Yeah THEY WANNA pick a guy for each team and have them do like a twenty nine game season play playoffs? I'm going to be trash so it's like a thing through MLB yes. I was selected for the Yankees. And I'm going to be at least I got there at the offense. Let's good I'll take that Garrett Cole works. You might get screwed up. Because if they do live Roster Zyuganov judger stanton so that kind of stuff. That's not good. Yeah I was looking at it. I'm like I'M GONNA kill if I've played smell like I love. That game is a few of them who just live on that stuff. I can't play that besides like video games. I imagine your big TV show movie Guy. What you've been binging on so maybe my wife we were catching up on I really like to watch those like air over shows on CW. We watched that we caught up on shit. Modern family All the comedy shows single payer Superstore Shit. A lot of Netflix shows. I don't watch Ozark or anything. Everybody's been freaking out about this. I have no idea what it's about just started. It's very confusing and it's a lot. You gotta pay attention. I'm a big Jason Bateman guy but only like to watch them in comedy movies. I refuse to watch him in the series exactly. Yeah I'd rather watch him in a comedy. He's hilarious identity thieves for just watched hundred twenty episodes of gossip girl in two weeks. Oh Gosh my wife would love that if I did that for it wasn't that I watched it for Blake lively and then ended up just being like all right. I'm just GonNa Watch this show at this point. I'm stunned. Yeah there is one. We probably watch it for that one actor. The guy that plays a I can never remember his name. The Guy Plays Winter soldier in all he was in it and I thought it was a mistake. I'm like wait. What's going on here. Did you see the show? You a necklace of so I was GonNa Watch it and so my wife she. She watched the first season. She got into the second season. She said there was a part where it is scarred and she shut it down. I think it was like the Meat Grinder. Substitute off the rallies. It's like the show this is someone is someone who's writing the show who wasn't a part of the team in season one. It's like I'm I don't even know how people come up with that Shit. Like all right. We gotTA relax there might be actual serial killers like writing the show. Yeah come on. What are we doing? We gotTa Watch out close. People is right in. This crazy shit's going Louis. Nineteen seventy now. Yeah I WANNA see that. How was that? It was great but I don't think anything happened what I think it was two hours and twenty minutes. Just fucking walking shit from what I heard. Everybody's been loving it. That's what I'm saying. I'm also a moron so I might have missed. That sure actually happens so be watching. Let me know. I'm definitely GonNa Watch that Syria? I gotTa Watch that the euro huge marble guy in a comic book Guy Right. Yeah big big time. Yup So What who would? Who is your hatred? Com- marvel character. I got to so I. I'm begging a captain America deadpool. Yeah Yeah those two favorites high Try to keep track of what goes on with them. A lot or office captain America they are. Tadpole like yeah. It's like Jekyll and Hyde Manson. That's why I like to give people my personality right there. You never know what you're GonNa get ever you During the season when an game came out where you were we So I didn't actually see it. I usually go every Thursday night to go. See those movies and it just happened. I wasn't there or we. We were somewhere. I don't know why I watch it. I ended up seeing a week later in San Fran. I think is where we were. Which of that overall thoughts were that racket loved it I gotta put it number one. Okay yeah out of the marvel movies all time I for some reason I star wars favorite movies. Okay even like the new ought not the newest ones the only one I liked. The new one was rogue one like that one. Now I've been telling people it's the best. I fell in love with the the main actress in that ended up just watching all her shitty movie. She's done in her career before that. She's in some like like a ski lift movie. That probably made logger behavioral. Don't live right life rights. You don't Shit like that. There's no reason to watch for movies. Missing is widely to this is how ended up and gossip. I watched era movie this break and then and now I'm on got finished also girl. I don't think I have anything left with Blake lively gotta move out of somebody else. Are we doing here like the movies? Do you like the Co. Are you a comic book reader to do you get the so? I don't have like I only have probably like five or six actual comic books but I have a bunch of graphic novels so like dive into like basically. I actually have him over there on my desk court. That's pretty cool. I mean grab them for you if like US pop up. There's still hear me. Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah. Yeah. Are you know grabbing? Yeah let's see. I think that's an awesome. Share Meta share is so fire. I love doing got up. That's awesome Tenable you guys listening to Tommy is holding up some deadpool comics vendors verse. X-men very cool turtles. Read up on them. Yeah that's coming out of only west to I got offense shipment. I got like ten more lease somewhere hidden away. That's awesome anything that's GonNa read kid your book. I can't read. I can't focus along. My wife always tells you try to read. I'm like no see I'm over. It isn't reason to read that many pages notaries reason. I don't know how people do it. Well you gotta be locked in. We've made movies like we had books for before. Movies were invented. Egli up to the media. Got Better if you could What happened on the marble a little bit but if you could pick one superpower what would a bit. I always say I WANNA fly. I think that's sick dagger or regeneration you'll have to be an asshole. Big Ailing also buck line regeneration regeneration. That's that's the big. Yeah that's true. That's pretty sick. Most on the map. What do you got? What do you think would help you most on the mound like flying not do shit right? That's it it's gotta be super straight man strikes hundred percent. I will say though. If you flew out to the mound. That's like fuck like got the flames and all that. But if Tommy's flying out to the mound I mean what are we doing here? Also you could watch like any deep fly balls. Just take off and flight. Maybe that is the answer would never give a whole. That's like a jump up flycatcher. Walberg back your good switching gears a little bit of quarantine life. We're all all our eating sleeping. Schedules are so off. I don't know yours are. But what's your go-to late night? Desert at like one in the morning these days I eat late to be honest. Yeah so like I cut it off. Probably rounds. I'd say eight. Eight thirty is the latest. I'll eat something but it's ice cream. Hundred percent okay. I get those little pints of ice cream snatch gone. Sega Smash Flavor Usually birthday cake. That's my shit terrible. Another big chocolate dark chocolate guy. I don't like I don't fuck with dark chocolate but I'll take like chocolate chips and stuff for sure. Take people people think? I'm weird when I tell them. I don't like something but I love. I Love Candy so I'll I'll eat a snickers bar that's trumpet. Uh-huh it's different in their cabinets. Exactly who recently that? You'll just go through a whole bag of gummy worms. Like out in Penn. Oh I yeah it used to be terrible like I was bad back Raleigh Shits since twenty sixteen. I finally kicked that I used to eat literally like two pound bag of Sour Patch. Kids smashing it during the game. I was obsessed. I mean I went today to target like one of the time to get out of the House and go get food and stuff and I must have bought shit five six bags of Sour Patch. Kids gummy worms. I don't even know what else acts everything I stacked up for the next like three weeks so I never have to leave the house. You'RE GONNA finish that by the end of the weekend right. So who is the Cook in the House these days? Are you cooking yourself or his wife handling that off? She she does she. Does the dinner stop so like? I'll offense for myself for breakfast and Lunch. But she's got me she's got me for dinner. She's good what's best thing. Shit I don't even know the honest everything. The only thing I ever cook at night is usually like burgers and that's about it. Baranov burgers could on the grill is about it but she does like the steak chicken all that pretty solid You talked about us. Are you go? Yeah you got your job you were saying about like your old died of like going through like crazy things you had this crazy red bull coffee thing. Talk about that for a little bit. Yes for a good while man. I was just as I think. I had like a really good outings after I had like three rebels. One day. It probably just made me super lock. Had No idea so there. I was like I have to do this every gate next thing you know. I'm doing three every game for like months. Next thing that year goes live next year. I'm up to like four. This is probably doesn't sixteen by drinking like three or four day than seventeen came and upward six. Just getting insane. Those was year. I felt I was so locked in a it was outrageous that in eighteen. I kept doing the same thing I was like. Oh I gotta do the safe thing. It'll work now with downhill new. Bring over to the Yankees. Is that everyone like what the fuck you do that for. I mean I like what the fuck this guy do a little bit. I did you guys before. Like coming back so like they kind of give a heads up like hey. This guy is pretty fucking nuts. The like it's eventually everybody come to love it and then just that's how it is you have to do it. Works like what I always mentioned. I played college. I jerk off once before a game. I went Oso right for doubleheader jerk off against long superstition in baseball. It's ridiculous well. We tried to play off thing with your magritte-like member that you got a bad with those Nami was was wearing. Burchett chewed on by a bird before like game one of the Al this year when you guys beat the twins the twins get the astros is wearing a short with Burchett on it for like two straight weeks. I the same thing. Look if you guys won the world series. I was ready to send that to cooperstown. That's amazing I do shit for the eagles like if If they if they lose. I won't wear plugging single thing. The rest of the week till Sunday or if they win I won't I won't watch basically anything I wore the week before. Yeah you gotta so. Eagles be your number one fan. Yes hundred percent. You got some weird shit though. What what is your magic fan. You're what are you? What is that? So growing up The Eagles I start like when I was like four years old. I remember watching the Eagles jets game of course like sit in front of the TV with my POPs. Next thing is like coach green but like eagles because it was sick so I was like I. That's why I'm with next radio. I like Randall. Cunningham. Just spirals in their Orlando. It's because of a Penny Hardaway Just loved the guy couldn't couldn't get enough and who else like Carolina Basketball Eight. Hardly great this is a great year so that not tournament so resigned like them was eight point. Jamison not even not even Michael Jordan dismantling J. I respect that Irish infringes and abusive Michael Jordan. It's like no no not even that and then people hate Ri- sale minority football fantasy low that I got for my thoughts. I can't Oh. Yeah that's that's that's a different story but you can't sabres. Yeah big saver said you are so all over the All New York Dima like that's it like people give me shit all the time about your another planet with that but you have a pretty good reasons. I feel like I didn't expect those reasons I expect. There's there's a reason there's always a reason that's the something I got going on. Yeah okay enough. you You like to mess with a lot of people as everyone saw with the the behind the scenes videos which were so good hopefully can continue those as the season progresses and all that but everyone was kinda demanding to the Tommy. Canley one and moving. It was it did. It did not disappoint. Who would you say is your favorite person? Thought with a man Scotty Brit. I'd say Brenner Chad. I can't I don't know if I am point. One but Suka is totally different. Like Chad's really quiet doesn't like to like kind of be outspoken. Ever bric Brit will be like come at you with something back. It's it's pretty fun like going after those. You have a favorite prank or like something that you ever pulled on me. I don't think I've never really old any pranks they do. They do that shit to me all the time. That's the thing I'm the one that gets all that stuff like every every every gain cy. I usually go down like an inning or two before Britain and so every time I go in I'll get like a couple of seeds and I'll put it up on the door so like when they opened the door to console over. I tried to do that every game. Never been the victim of Gartner Prac- all he loves dude. It's me what what is so. One of them was What year was it was an eighteen in camp? Spring Camp He told literally the first day Russell showed up. He goes up to him and tells them. Hey that guy you gotta you gotTa do something by the time. He leaves here. What he ended up doing was so last day. Russell Stair steps He's always there. He's air super early everyday. So I came in coming my locker all my eagles jerseys got DOT C. It didn't know where they were. My helmet was like Kinda this year at the when the Super Bowl so the helmet dumping thing I get closer. I look at it. It looks like it signed by run someone S. I'm like what the fuck this guy decided. Eagles like this guy. Give me next year. I kind of look again. It's early sounds like all still hired chip could see next. I'm like Oh let's take the group that obviously the next thing you know there's a there's a Jersey of Russ just hanging in there and it's like hope He's like don't need these eagles jerseys anymore. Oba Hope. This one's good for you go hawks. They signed that news but basically he liked him somewhere and put that pull the program and everything but it was all because of garden elaborate plan rest guarded by hand through the whole thing to everyone came up goals so far every single player. We've talked to. Have you ever been the victim of garnered prank? Like no the Tommy every single time. So Oh yeah so his name I think like at least it's gotta be at least ten by now without a doubt. I bet you some. I don't even realize that he does. He's probably show mad. He's like how did he not realize what just happened? You just keep going. He likes to get everybody with the The salt in the drinks. It's the worst. Yeah Oh yeah sometimes you wanted to put it in there but like sprinkled all around the drink like like he did put it in is the worst I have. I have a feeling that might Karki has gotten you a few times. But the whole thing Faking that you're going in He He's got a quite a few times. I know you always does the everybody the first time you're there. He does it to a rookie every time the first first game there gets them up nate. Y'All doubt and sit show ass down. But he got he does get like if you Kinda Mesler He'll try to fuck back with you doing that. Then you get. It's like patch. Get your heart rate and next suit show. As that's incredible I listened to their On our to Ruko podcast with CC. Him buner like these huge bachelor fence which I just had no idea about. And they're like they were telling the story of how they would watch it on the IPAD with a glass of wine on the bus and they refused to get off until there's a commercial and that's because I never would expect hockey and boon to be those guys but I'm telling you right now there's probably at least ten guys that watch that show and dancing players players rat him out alumni out right now. I know it's great. Greenie is one montgomery. I remember in spring monk. Montgomery ingredient like a series finale. Like big like party like set it up like made like a cheese red meat scranton. My come what do we do these? Boy I know like you said like art watches it. Buni try to like I know points more. I just can't even pinpoint him right now. I like it see. Montgomery do a nice little cheese picture. Montgomery sharing a glass of red wine. Greenie his wife in Mani they'll have like little like big watch. The Watch the series this spray. I was like guys. What are we doing this whole time? I'm trying to picture you explaining to. Dj Lemay who what the Bachelor isn't him just like not competing with any of that is because like I wouldn't be surprised if he watches it with his wife. Sarah Yeah Fair Enough Dj. Who usually. Because I feel like so hyper and everything and Dj just so locked in like can't figure out anything but baseball like do you ever do. Try to mess with them sometimes So I yeah so. I've known DJ for Awhile so like He's probably one of the few guys I can. I'm one of the few guys get more album than most people so I think it's pretty funny. 'cause he'll even come out of his way to talk to me about like Shit and it's pretty funny because he doesn't do that most people but I can get him laughing and shit he loves it because I'm pretty out of control so but he loves to talk about like hockey. That's his thing he loves. I always mess with them with fantasy football and madden anything like gaming wise so like stuff like that. He's really interested in so you can get them going. All the time that but is for the most part will be quiet. He gives you like little smirks and stuff when he finds it funny. But it's just now is the Silence assassin that. Yeah I mean gotTa love what he brought to the table. Last year hopefully can do it again. This year So obviously the reason you're at home right now and no playing is this whole quarantine thing and we're all doing our part here and just recently. A few days ago they came out with this proposed plan of basically a bio dome in Arizona. And all these all these rules. What early thoughts on that? So I I WANNA play. That's the one thing I want to play. I don't care what what happens. I could care less days. I just want to play baseball again. I'm stuck here doing nothing. So I mean what in terms of Arizona? I'm not a big fan of Arizona so I wish it was somewhere else but I mean if that's the last case resort we gotta go to. I'm all for it but like I've always told everybody. Arizona's not pitchers friendly place especially those spring training sites. Those those places are wild. I mean I would mind if he played in the Dome but it could get interesting if we play it all these outside places. Okay so I it's not has something to do with Arizona like the people or anything. It's just like the air in all air quality. Off-line is not fat. Yeah there's no grass no trees. It's it's not one of my spots. Come UP HERE UPSTATE. New York and get away. It's great. It's what did he what was part of the proposal. Is the strike zone like electronic strike zone the fastest year? Like all that stuff like sit next like how would it be for you? You're always like talking everybody. You're going to have to be six feet. Apart for everyone in the stands that can be a doug. I thought about that like yellow. I'm literally like just probably be yell at people like sixty bar just yellen because there's nobody in the stands besides just us so it's going to be like what the this weird Allo. They won't even need the Mike. You guys you can just hear you in the background like screaming. Hey Brian Hey Brian you see that. There's a good chance you're going to be here in mid inning and shit like that. It's Oh man it's interesting the electronic strike zone. I don't know how that's GonNa work. Because that's what to me three or four years away from like they were just starting out in the Atlantic where they're just testing it out and now we're just going to throw that into the majors like that could be. I don't know I think that'd be. I left the whole six foot thing is going to be interesting either. GonNa do August. Would you now feel like pitchers might Kinda like that? There would be no more mound visits. 'cause you guys don't like getting bothered on Mount? Sometimes that affects you a so the I I think it could affect some guys like I know I. I'm not a big fan of mound visits but I mean it does give you a breather every once in a while especially if you throw in like fifteen twenty pitches. I'm out there. Dass like just like I need a break right now right. I think it could. It could affect some guys for sure and guys that basically feed off what the like. They need kind of some kind of feedback mid game. Maybe I know I know some guys like that. I might need that but it could. I think that could be a problem. If there are none you come off to me. Is someone who really loves like the feed off the energy a fan. You saw it right away in the twenty seven playoffs like those are some of my best like late at night. Go on Youtube you go watch the Tanaka Canley game like you bail and everybody out go fucking crazy and then so now. We wouldn't have that it'd be it'd be a huge strikeout the bases-loaded everybody out and just be like golf clubs like whatever. I feel that would mess with you. All I mean to be honest probably will a little bit just because I do feed off the fans even though that could be a problem sometimes but I get to jacked up. Sometimes I don't make pitches but the energy is like a big thing when I'm pitching I love it and Cook it weird. If there's nobody in the stands beside just your teammates y'all I mean it was just like planning college against me to be honest. Sharona like twenty fans anyways so it was like cares. Yeah I was trying to think how a walk on with working with like Shit. Can't go near each other now. Walk off we're good quality to watch us go nuts. When no one's doing anything there is a good chance I'll still be going nuts when there's nobody stance talking shift to the robot empire or something going to happen. Oh yeah what's the most foul balls who catches the most home runs you'll know competitve fan's stance exactly. It's going to be so strange. We're going to get rid of US going to get the ball that's going to be pinching solid. That's what we do is like one guy was always designated will get the foul. Morgan was the worst team in high school. Last whoever gets out with your the good rushton room man brutal so on like a plane. We always talk about like how. Dj So quiet. You always Kinda see him in these pictures on planes to sitting like his head turned away from everybody like looking at film. What's your like activity on the plane like? Are you literally jumping around from like Rotorua? Like fathering people I am. I am the loud on the plane. That's that's that's definitely for sure. I mean there's Times or hurt we take us that I'm trying to serve the. I'll try to serve for like ski. Like this is what it is like talking to myself right now. I do a Lotta dumps it on the plate so oh man I gotta keep it keep you live though. Yeah there's always guys I try not let sleep. It's our trainers. So if I see him sleep bloke over like play with their hair like flick their ears. Something they get this house. My next question is like who is like the worst flyer who is there. Somebody who's like always like there's a little. Bit of turbulence you freaked. Oh everyone's great. I'm the only one I yell. At some of the words though some of the worst is is one. I O every time that happens. I look and I go. I know I know he's like shut up. Eight eight hundred but I think brick. It's pretty freaked out with it and then I green actually next to me saw like I'll hit him on his leg lock regard. It's great by guys. You're going to be fine. There was There was a few few people at work this year. Who were flying flying private for the first time. Yeah one of the guys at work. He literally just sent them an article like the amount of plane crashes per year. It's like it's GonNa go find. It was big cat to like Trent. It was like why are you doing absolutely you sat there staring straight ahead like Oh my God this is over so I can kind of the same way with that which he freaks out man. I you should see their faces. Everybody's like Oh shit it's out of you know I have. You know you just so smart where he'd be like well typically speaking like or very likely down right now. That's the one thing that gets. Yeah it's crazy. I agree with you. One thing you'd like come on. What are the chances I actually like go down here? He's he's he's very intelligent. That's definitely one thing that's fantastic. We always like to ask Pitcher Catcher What is your coaching? Move in a brawl like you feel it coming. What are you a glove thriller? What's what's your move. There gotta be the spirit and then then granted Pam. Yeah you take on route or something. It's the goldbergs sphere and then granted. That's fantastic that's the farthest it's the Farnsworth basically or the Farnsworth. Yeah that's awesome. Yeah because you you were involved with that whole tigers that I was actually. I wasn't there so we'll know you were in like you were youth what you hit more or less started it. Actually I mean like time I was already I was already in the clubhouse. It sucks like everything. Everything accumulated by the time. I was already gone I didn't it was it was knee Warren. And somebody else were already up upstairs like and we couldn't you can't go back out on the field or else it's like some crazy fine. So Yeah Joe Joe in Warren and Joseph. You're not going there. He's like stay like you like I saw on TV. I don't I started sprinting. Just like no I was like Oh shit all right now would have been really funny if everything was dying down and all of a sudden come out like a bullet and restarts everything you got sick. Hey maybe who knows? Maybe this year next year we something else. Few Things Bruin here but Funny Draft Store View is where you were when you got drafted by the Yankees. You're on a Taco Bell drive-thru. Oh yeah that's that's very true so you just do not expect it to happen then or hostess hungry I mean I I was at my like old teams place so I was like. I got draft yet so I'm starting the like a little past la. I'm like I need to get through. I went to Taco Gal Grafton Street pulling the drive through next thing I get this. Call Him all right when cancer like. Oh Hey what's up What do you think about a you know? Whatever taking this for sure the next thing you know like they call back just drafted you. I was like Oh okay here. We go literally as to order the food. Shaolin down on since cream. Can I get the double Cheeseburger Larva clearly like trying to order. Got The call out on my God. It sucks right now setting Salad started all of that. Got To tell you getting drafted. What's your Acapella Order Let's see I always get the cruncher supreme meal. Then you get the this crunchy Taco and that come you gotta get the Baja blast with it does a guarantee. Yes no doubt then. I always end up getting chicken. Schlueter Supreme People hate the wind. Nobody likes that. Think it's great now. That was the chicken burrito. Then if I'm feeling good I'll end up getting a another coach. Crap Supreme Tactic crunching there. I do like those but I. It's every once in a while but eh actually start and the doritos locos doctrines. She's gotta get that. I can't believe that the cinnamon twist are just macaroni. Baffled every time. It's macaroni with cinnamon on Caramel Caramel apple thing. That they used to hip or I think they still do. It's unreal. I used to give it all the time Is this like pre diet. Tom Mechanic which is a current calendar. This is current if I if I feel like I need to get some fast all going at it gonNA order that holds. Go to fast food. No I would say that. It's gotTA BE CHICK FIL. I okay. I can't help myself. I actually to be honest if I really want. Go to McDonalds Shane. I'm I'm t McDonalds to everybody. Hates mcdonagh Donald's no everything right? People are down like Portland that they're like. Oh it's so unhealthy. It's not guarding. Mcdonald's awesome. Give me a big Mac nuggets like like. I know it's not healthy. I don't care that's the whole reason. I'm going there fucking leary's logo there. I one day like Donald's you can't try to be healthy kit like trying to help you. Don't go to McDonalds right elbow. I'm probably one of the few people in the world that actually eat filet of fish for McDonald's. I think they're fantastic. Wow my testing. Yeah Oh yeah. I should say craziest thing you said by Clark Hall Friday during lent meal and I was a kid. I'd love to hit a filet of fish for vice too long John Silver. That's the best I don't know if I all never had made you got to track down. He's actually talking belly long. John Silvers to get to. Yeah unbelievable you can't find value. They don't even exist anymore. Housing to say I have ever seen in New Jersey New York. All the time a we'll ask what I saw was in Scranton. Ta when I was there the last one I saw what a shame. I should have went. I didn't even go so mad. Never GonNa see it again. Never We talk about video games before lose. Obviously the very competitive Madden League Elliott Norman. At one point you're just playing for people. They beat the computer for them so we could just get into the playoffs. Oh no no no. I was playing for him. So in the as a commissioner you can go in and you can send them w or you can send him a loss of just they if they play. I could see I could see how many play so like some guys playing games econ sounds like you get the win. Whatever will get onto the next week that way. Everybody could make the playoffs and could be kind of fun so the first season I did that and we had five guys make it from the AFC. Because I didn't realize we had two guys in the AFC EAST. We had two or three guys in the AFC West so we had no AFC north team or no AFC south team though is basically like got your Shit Outta luck. Sorry and it ended up. Being voided was the one that didn't get it. Yeah of course and now he's GonNa be the one again. That doesn't make playoffs again this year. So I'm on the second season now. you got it where. I can see you being like. She wants to. What Heller in the finals unreal? I have the twitch of the game is on A. It's on my channel. Okay might have to go back and listen to that. I could see you like being not talking to your wife for a full day. It wasn't that bad. I take it that bad. I had it all set. You'll see how I lost. I basically looked it up. I had the win at. What's your go-to Mattis drowsier? You like somebody. Who are you gonNa you know punt on fourth down kneel at the end of the game are you just gonNa run the football to set up play action or you just balls to the wall Definitely the first part for sure. I mean it's four down in your in your own territory you punt the ball. Let's what are we doing here? This is like we're playing like arcade rules or something love. There's what there's only like one guy that does that frazier of course of course and then Like if most of the time basically killing all these guys anyways I just I want you to know I'll start running the ball on chewing clock in the third quarter. Just like keep the score down and let the game run. I'd try to like help them in stuff during the game like tips but a this season actually played more guys. So it was. It's been a bloodbath deed. So the the two games dj before when he beat me by two and then. I beat him the game. I beat him in the. Nfc Championship game was crazy. I got out to twenty nine two six lead and then I blew it. And he came back and took thirty to nine with like two something. I didn't convert. He got the ball. Bax and He decided to throw the ball twice and the the second time he threw it was third down. Take them off. Ran It. Back for a touchdown they went to the superbowl. That's how I played. Elrick is simple. Jesus Heller eller almost screwed it up and ship game against King ended up a scoring with like shit. I think like twenty seconds left king had them the whole game. Goddamn are you undefeated right now. The new season no. I lost the first week of the season. Computer allows pretty trump bar game. It's like whatever yeah. It was bad like this sucks then the next loss was basically me and older could flare game so I told him I'll just straight seven send it and of course team ends up way. I'm just like come on now. What was this a two losses? But basically I've the the third the rubber match between me and DJ. I beat them. Forty one to six basically. I figured out his how he plays. Now he's done it again on Ozzie. Played a beata. I've taken it softly. Last Guy Superbeet judgy yesterday. Thirty four to seven a beat a who was at before him away. I think waivers like forty one to seven actually forty eight fourteen. Somebody I beat floored like forty one to six. Oh my by those games. Don't I'd like stop. I just stopped. It was like first quarter. I'm up twenty eight. Nothing I'm like. I'm just GONNA slow down Heller on the other hand. He's the guy that will try to run it down the road so he talked about the other like a couple days ago. Eighty four to fifth or I was like I really. We don't hear I could do the same thing if I wanted. Roofless ruthless is completely ruthless. I couldn't believe it when he when I saw it. Now these are your drafting these teams. Right so what is your tier two? So actually this year. I made a lot of changes trades and stuff so I Right now I have a defense. I have on my defensive line. It's clear Max deal hunter. A hand is a superstar and Chris Jones and then at linebacker I have a Jalen. Smith drew tranquil. And so we did the dress. So I have a Levine. Chase the kid from lsu. Yeah Yeah. So who's your before like Mac blades at outside linebacker got it? What's your offense locally So we're ahead. I eventually figured out how to trade for once I got once Void TRADED NEED. Mccaffrey for like two first round picks. And something else I like number two loves bundle right. Voi-voice is does run the ball. So I was like what's the point he can happen here? I got them traded for Juju cooks have Isabela. Who's a superstar? Might tight end is a a changed chase? Klay Pools Titan wives good. I could buy spit it out but I think it's like Villanova elston Jenkins Travis Frederick. I'll talk to you. Remember your whole I just remember. I just I just like this. My my secondary growth sue. I mean I got a was it. A traded for Justin Simmons. My strong safety. I traded for Adrian Amos. Mike Corners are Byron Jones Jeff Okuda and Nickel of eight people and I won't remember half of them. You will all ribbons by the fifty three man roster if I could Brian Castle at some of these trains like ripping people. Oh Yeah well I was somehow trade. I basically figured out like the trae now is telling all the other guys and they were doing it. We're getting first round. Picks freedom to other teams like their star players but I kept going after Gilmore and Jalen Ramsey impossible can't get them. Can you cannot get them. I tried a million different things. That's pretty crazy. Yeah I I I love how I wish like. The mattingly was more like now. You're twitch dreamlike public. I'm sure people will be chiming in and watching that stuff by. Oh you people need sports these days. I'm watching like our boss is like opening packages and it's awesome random things and he got like Samurai swords and axes. You gotta go. That's sports to US right now. So we need. We might need to chime in on the Yankees Madame League. Happy Sports at set lines and just go from there because we got right now. I mean that's what we're trying to do is Brit was trying to set up a whole like twitch thing with the. We're actually talking to someone of the gaming companies and it ended up through because Britain basically didn't big like these guys I would say I mean he's right. There's probably four or five of us. That would probably ideally do what they wanted us to do. So I mean what I'm GonNa do it on my own will be A few more things will wrap up you. Had you thank you for your time? And all that but conspiracies. We always talk about conspiracies. Do you have a conspiracy theory that you'd like held onto that? You always think about big. He's alive man real one hundred percent. I guys real. Are you like a hunter? No IRA for some reason. Every time I would watch them I guess things real another whereas real last summer I was going away with some friends and one of my friends girlfriends and she was like bringing her friend and they were like. Hey like there's just one thing you should know about her like don't make fun of a little off and I was like okay. Like what do you mean? And she's like yeah like big foot hunter like see like sheep creek conventions like bigfoot hot with like what you doin. Bigfoot podcast like. How much weekly news is there to be breaking down every bigfoot merch so if you WANNA get into bigfoot game that's where you start yeah right yeah like I I firmly believe? There's there's an alien thing like the government's covered up under percent. They've already been here for. Who knows how long. I love that. I'm a hundred percent like Denver. All those like crazy documentaries on netflix about it. I loved it. Yeah the whole the whole Denver. Airport thing to me is just insane. Not only for conspiracy to go online right. The biggest thing I've been thinking about lately I remember I was watching some show and these people started fucking ripping off like seven different languages. How do you think we got mad languages? You think it was just people all started speaking English one guy. Hey got another person he said. Fuck you I'M GONNA learn Spanish and then it just came from just came from way out there man pillar just giving us weird languages Just throwing it all out there now. I think so. I didn't like you channeling. I'm wearing my own language to talk to you. What were you like in school where you just the problem? Trial like always in the principal's office. No not really. I was really quite yet well so if I didn't have any friends in the classroom super quiet just fall asleep. Didn't care didn't pay attention. Okay Yeah and then my friends are in the class. I was out of control. The teachers will have to tell me to shut up all the jets. That's pretty able quite then. 'cause I hated school I never wanted to be there. Aided yes I just wanted to leave. Go play sports outside. You'll do something. Sports related issue. This is just bad research. Did you go to college? Yeah where'd you go to college on the Lynn University? Okay so you're there. Are you just like schools? Why am I? Why am I doing that so I just WanNa pitch basically like so the first semester I I basically didn't do so well in our school policy is like you have to have two hours freshman or you can't play yeah ahead. Under that couldn't play. They were pretty furious that I was GONNA. I was GONNA end up being one of the I think I was going to be the mid week starter at the time but I mean whatever ended up working out. Start throwing like ninety five. That's spring everybody's saying Holy Shit. What happened the Guy who get two point? Oh but he's still a ninety five percent bad days just like fuck all right well I started lifting weights and stuff so I was like all right not saying the same thing with same. Exactly Didn't have a two point my first semester so I couldn't rush the second semester for Frat so didn't do a Frat so basically yeah. Did you say ninety five came out of nowhere just like one day? I was brought me throw live my. I live in the spring. Wam Ninety five. They're all like they like check the times. I didn't know what I came off the field. Probably you good name you know. Don't like ninety nine ninety five John It. Where were you before that in the fall? I was just like like ninety one. Sit Eighty nine. That doesn't satellite to people but ninety one ninety five is in Sync Leo because the fall when we like really like started like working out and stuff and like Nah I started once I was ruled eligible. I basically just long tossed shit out of the ball and just kept lifting and then by the time I got my I live. It was popped out all right. We're good was that in I point. You're just like okay. I can be in the big leagues like this is. This is real now. They might be able to get drafted now. More or less cool. Did he lived so again? If it happens it happens. I guess maybe I could. Yeah I would. I would the school just to play baseball in Florida. Act Cool sick on the workout. She you're coming from You came from the White Sox and you were the rockies before that first of all the white Sox I hate that. Stand the whites onto the worst team in the MLB. Should I honestly think they should be demoted to the minorities? It native White SOx stadium. That's fucking hate the whites but talk about like the except like I know coming over the Yankees. It seems like there's not really a big like oh like who's that guy the outside and all that kind of like accepted welcomed in. No problem is how different is that. What the White Sox rockies and how great was it with the Amine? It's definitely different like being accepted wise. I feel like the Yankees definitely. They do a great job with everybody like new. That comes in so then when I left I was the white sox like my first Sprang It was tough like really not know what I think I do. Like three people that from previous teams that played with So I just talked time and then eventually like people do like warm up to but it it takes a little bit. It's it's I would say. The veterans are usually different from team to team. So it depends on that but it felt like soon as I showed up in New York. They were like all right. Let's go. They're ready to It really they accepted it. They're like whatever pitching. Get Out. Stoneleigh fucking matter what you do. I will say like I had a great time with Chicago. Those guys were great in the. We'll say it was a little slower to get to know them. You know what I mean like but overall it was great. It was great. I mean we didn't do. Well I mean what are you GonNa do? Thanks very good but I feel like a lot of good players here and there but I just didn't Mesh. Well I guess you miss having you have the beard right now Do you miss having you being aware the beard in the flow like you have the rockies so I missed the missed a hair cut to be honest. Beard right now is just because I'm so lazy I literally won't go take it and just buzzard off. I don't know why I've I've been telling my wife every day. I'm like I need shakes literally. I don't want this is like I just I just don't care I just don't feel like going upstairs just buzzing it off. Whatever cares. It's itching I hate it. It just had like my neck beer right now. Basically this if I could just have like stub. I guess it'd be fine. Whatever yeah I don't mind the shaving whatever need for a month out of like not. I've got rocket ordeal. So says the man. I told myself I was GONNA shower for this because I'm Chad like he's at this point. Just don't leave my room all day. I was like the interview today. We'll do that just didn't happen. Maybe we'll maybe it'll happen tomorrow. Who got a couple of years back to buy a good gap where I haven't showered for a couple of days? I just don't care. There's no point we'll wrap it up with this unless you've got some other questions but who would be your favorite and least favorite personally be stuck in quarantine with right now. Let's see my favorite person's GonNa be Britt for sure. Is it your partner to now? Actually A it was Chad Green before and then Brit stolen from me last spring. He'll say well he didn't but they did and then let's see who Leased thank. There's someone that you walk over to them to try to mess with them. They just roll their eyes. Like not It's got to be one of the by afraid you'll see real is awesome said Dj. Because like he just east miserable right now without baseball so I bet you I could figure out a way to keep him pretty like yeah. I could figure it out. You might be able to save safety Janelle by needs you. You facetime him. You should face time after it'd be like hey man like are you good. I gotta get him on so he. He actually texted me. I think it was yesterday. He's like finally downloaded concert places for like about I or if you've been he plays xbox like gotTa stop is playstation time each still watching film from like last year. All right highly. I got best. We can move on at this point. I think he is pretty miserable. He can't go to the field anymore but like I got a video of the other day. Where he's he's on. His roller blades can do hockey shit. Kitchen unbelievable is what his life Said like that all the wives they have like their snapchat. They do all day and Yeah they his wife said Ronca my wife's the one that I see him just rollerblades dangling That made its way to social media. You WanNa know but it actually. Yeah not in his kitchen and we're like Oh shit like Italy really more just point. Good stuff I would do it in. We can figure it out. Yeah I've actually. I went to his his family. Friends placed one time after we got in from a flight. We went over there and this guy this house's crazy like there's like multiple basketball hoops tennis courts. Next thing you know like there's like this court can play rollerblade hockey like we're doing right now when we went out there and I started just record shots instead. It was great. I want side like hockey game. It was unbelievable just to make your just what the Hell is going dripping sweat? That's incredible you guys have anything else to ask. Tommy. Dj is human after all we like basically every every episode or every time we interview someone we asked about you. We basically asked every single person about you for like a year and a half or like once you crazy story and then is a human being so we basically got yeah. We finally credit crack codes. Kill two birds one stone. That is not that But Tommy really appreciate you taking time come out here hopefully see on the mound in Arizona. I know you. Maybe you don't like the. Hopefully the ball ball stays down your hundred percent increase. Which or you can just fly fly balls but real patient really appreciate you coming on taking the time. This was awesome. And we'll see out there. Thanks guys guys. I want to thank Tommy for coming on top mccamley coming onto the short porch. Finally I know you guys enjoy. I mean that was I. I rarely will go back. I don't like the sound of my voice and all that and I will. I listened to that full hour. Enjoy every part of it. 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You just came off of You're up till seven in the morning or something like that. I watched as long as I could. I think I think four thirty. My is stopped working but Jesus Me Like fucking pump up speeches in the middle of like three o'clock in the morning as you step the whole time. Tj Y- sickle. I'm up that late and not that late but pretty late normally but I wanted to make not when you start watching videos on youtube zero. Yeah that's when he watches like cats. Get -ducted dry. I'm surprised that one took a long as it did to be honest. I don't use the pot. The Pot was so small that you use the worst. Whatever was bullshit but yeah? I started getting frustrated. I threw up at like four thirty in the morning. I was a wild thing we got. I had too many apple out too much applebee's too many wings and Mozzarella sticks it was disgusting. It was just a mask in my mind. I cried at one point I was going to say. Oh Yeah I mean. At some point you reach a point where like you believe. This will never happen. And you'RE GONNA be here forever contingency plan if you just literally can't get something just have to keep going because you know what you need. Can you take a break in resume? I guess I could like accompanying hour power nap and then get back at. Yeah but you know. I didn't finish one. I'd get so much shit for it. Oh yeah for anyone confused and not caught the speed specifically my uncle Harry listening to this has no idea what's going on good to help you. Hope you're enjoying hope you're doing well. Rates meet in. Tampa Grayton RESEDA inside. But he Has Been doing this thing every Saturday. It's pretty much every Saturday. Right or is it is it. Is there a day Lachmann? It's usually Tuesday Saturday. Which is due to doing one tonight? Okay so much man. Whatever he does these crazy crazy trick shots and all that Tony People Watch them on periscope. But it's basically sports these days and this one he did on Saturday he basically had A golf club in his hand he has ping pong balls only seven at the time and he has the hit it off of the pot which is about seven feet in front of him eighteen in front of them and then about that pot into Danish mouth and then so he tried that and it took you twenty six hundred fifty yet. Twenty six twenty five and nine and a half hours but I 'cause you know you guys know the chat when you're on livestream light. The first time I went live. Someone told Me Coach K. Died I stop the Stream and went to go look at like blog Alec Fuck. He's very healthy. I had to go back and this time they're like Oh Scott. Van Pelt ceus judge our Gaza. Jails like all right. Stop like Louis. And they're actually fucking commenting in the extreme. Which is their four in the morning. He's like I should be in Augusta right outside watching Bush because I believe in most woman that was from him. That's a quote that you keep with you for the rest of your life. You Hang Your House. The thousand percent like jared. Goff's nicer all like good quarterback shirt but Scotsman pelts saying that is fucking off your expect Jared Goff to be watching that yes like a stool E. N. T. Wright Big Cat and then it's just like he's just ESPN's Guy. Yeah that guy. He was clearly like he woke up in the middle night. Maybe couldn't sleep. And he went downstairs. He was going to get like a glass of milk or so that he saw your stream and there's didn't leave that area for like hours. That was late in the night to yet. That was like three or four in the morning crazy. Abilene raise my fucking. The worst was yesterday. My back was done yesterday. Your arms must you either get blisters by my shoulders. Heart ALBUM FUCKING MASK. Terrible usual wrong club. My Buddy who was watching it was like he should be using a sixty degrees on a club. Pro I walk as I make a difference with Lofton ship. It does because I was using the fifty six or sixty and then all of a sudden like seven hundred night mix up. The clubs on accident was using a pitching wins. Oh my pitching wedge a hundred and seventy odds. We try to hit it five feet. It's incredible incredible. Oh in Biz. Nasty keep calling into the day that was did he not understand what was happening. Or is he trolling you know. He could not figure out that what he called. The stream stops every single day. What are the odds? Yeah he's like. Why where's the street trying to show you this dude you keep calling and doing when he did sir he could not understand for the life of like even only told me all right all right five but do pen kept saying pendulum credits via pendulum the pendulum I love that. What's the one you're doing tonight Have you seen that he gets tagged in it? Like the off like five different pods on now. Yeah it's GonNa be all in like how the pots are set up. I know that's not as hard as an art once. You ought setup. I feel like you know like eventually get it. But if you don't set up right you're you're fucked. Let's why the work on that after this. Please shoot some bigger pox tonight. Dry House bobby. We need to talk about finally have something in common here Austin powers that blew my mind. I lost my shit when they told me I was wait. What and then I started data. Happy believing that. Hold on let me. Finally we have something in common. What kind of. What kind of comment is that? You do SPAG. You're GONNA blow pass. I had knew that is that crazy. I supposedly yes whether dumb ones. He plays like everyone that movie. Yeah Fat Bastard. Yeah he's like every. Yeah it's it's it's created Michael Myers. It's like who this guy is all these people. But like. Hey puts up Takashi on did not realize that I saw Kendra tweet and then I was like I saw tweet and and everyone was like. How do you not know this? I was like wow. I never realized that I guess Goldfinger whoever go I don't know I don't pay too much attention to you. But back their evil is crates. You see those gifts all the time like Pat. He's got his pinky. Like the fact that I've seen that those gifts and should so many times and never put together that it's awesome powers racer. I know that like fat bastard. I could see like he's got a fat suit on rights-based but Dr Evil I'm in data have me convinced that fucking mini me was into. Oh a new. That'd been correct incorrect. I One more thing I gotta bring up here. It's been debated Hatami Group chat pretty much all week and it's not WanNa Grin. If there was one age you can go back to relive one year and then you go back to being twenty five twenty six yard but you can just take a one year hiatus real quick and then go back to this exact point. What age would you go back to is it? Are you going to live the same life that you live Yeah I go back to where I am right now. Yeah you don't lose any time in your life senior college so that was easy answer. So let's say take out. College Casino is is the correct answer. Yeah you know Senior College. I build back here. Well you should Tommy. Actually I was GonNa say junior college from chain college. Don't pick out no college all. Yeah let's say let's say you don't have to you. You can choose to relive it exactly how you did it where you can change things up a little bit in that. World Tenth Grade. That's sophomore in high school. Why I fucking like my balls dropped. I didn't sound like Mickey Mouse Anymore. And I when I when I was like really really drinking and it was like the rush of drinking and you're not supposed to unbelievable. I don't condone it. But it was unbelievable. I have two choices I was GONNA say just first year out of college like working are stolen stuff about your childhood not like horribly answering this fucking you're going to be. You did not make that clear. You told every answer we're giving like no you can't choose out talking childhood question. I'm going. I'll say second grade. That was my pretty much like peak like I was Charlie Brown in the school play. Charlie Brown Valentine's Day I twenty five lines be also more than like six Like the ladies man at the class in third grade. Actually here's a fun. Little Story There was a my teacher said. I never smiled but still there's one picture me smiling. She liked hung up at the front of the class and saw like literally my classroom. Just one picture me smile. Nobody else had their picture up there and one day Thursday. We were changing seats and Miss Sucrose. My teacher she was like I get my seat set and she was like it was like you have to sit across from a girl or a boy and girl in the class wants to sit next to palm is. Every single. Girl's hands went up except the one. I was literally fucking Leonardo di Caprio back. Who is the one girl who didn't raise your hand? Oddly enough a girl that I ended up quote unquote dating for ten minutes in sixth grade. so she says she was trying to like play hard to get. Yeah Yeah my answer was when I was twelve which is I guess fifth grade. I really just WanNa play literally again literally was so much fun like getting grade. I was pretty good back then. Like literally was like when you were like de sit and like everyone was competitive second. It's too young when you're in second grade but fifth grade talk competitive like I will look forward all week to whenever my weekday literally Amos and then Saturday. We play that she was awesome and in the summer you look at it like Halo three years of war. I would be cooking with you. Don't even know what was going on the outside world besides like when you're like the Yankees replying or whatever but like there was enough to worry about money. No insurance health right now like I. I woke up your day with severe chest pain in my left side. I was like wow. I'm just GonNa Die Right now. This is it and it just went away but back then you. You feel immortal when you're like twelve years old playing little league you're just kind of starting to like figure out what girls are like. Oh like they're pretty attractive. Like cool you like chasing them around. Even though it's not working but like it's just like fun I think. Twelve is the perfect time to go back. I I wish I could relive well. I think you're right because you're right like a one text message from a girl. Holy Shit I'm talking to a girl while my your razor some shit or like when you leave your aim message up like hey baby. Emma texts me. Yeah no they're also Do you guys have bbn? Now I'd be my first phone was in Envi- to the verizon envy to envy was fire Ayob Bmw Ping Do fucking I have ABM? I also my first one was did. Lg View was screen phone. That shit was also was like the first iphone kind of Ida t mobile sidekick which they hadn't Zoe Wanna one so I felt. I never had a razor. Never had a razor guys remember the voyager I wanted to voyager so bad I never got it but it was like before then remember. That was a fun time when everyone had their own different phones. And that's the envy kidnapped. The sidekicks twelve years old. Though that was when we were like twenty five ten for me which would be twelve which yeah yeah it was also twelve is on the cost. I met was five. I was yeah Novas twelve is also on the customer like Bar Mitzvahs and Shit. I remember I went to one who is spoken sick. Yeah and so. There's like a decent amount of like Jewish kids around your so like all my friends were Jewish. I had a bar Mitzvah that But when I had one yeah why have you Passover? Belated should we read that text exchange? Yeah Real Quick Mart. He's got to go to so we gotta we gotta go quick but now it's funny easier and reluctant so so you know it's the three of us. Tj Avery. He's an attorney helped us out with production posting editing social stuff like that last whenever Passover was. I don't know Thursday or something he. He texted in our short pappy. Passover Tommy out of out of nowhere out of left field like let me remind. Everyone a Tommy's last name is skip belly. I look you get sold all the time. I look Jewish. Okay like that makes sense but usually if like you know my last name like you can figure out Italian usually Italians or Catholics or whatever. Uh So he's happy. Passover Tommy hubs. Tommy is not Jewish. I just said what and then avery sends the Stephen A. Yet for it's like we've been hoodwinked. Bamboozles led astray hubs is says. My last name is human. I said my last Amos the belly he's like I'm Jewish. I went this whole time thinking. Tommy was Jewish shaking my head again. I guess I look Jewish. But my my name's in a giveaway and then Hayward said young Tommy Looks Very Jewish and I was like. Are you going to wish up over instead? I am Jewish Passover. Where cows over hub? I'm sorry religious. Don't celebrate it and then I was like at that point. I'm like basically this is like Michael Scott. Calling David laws for his birthday like this. Is Avery wanting happy? Passover ratio where like Abbie Passover Avery and that's pretty much how it And he was like from my recollection. I could have sworn he was Jewish so that was just a bazaar little little ten minutes of also five minutes after we all followed and got followed by the Bantu friends. Well Grachev moment. There were those. There's no like I just don't know why he had say like no result in you know what not to say happy and like I would never say that unless I was one thousand percent sure like yeah I do not have any clue. I need to see like you physically. Celebrate on your instance story for me I lately. Especially if he's Jewish should know like last names in should've being Jewish yes bellied. No not how. That's a clear wolf. No yeah crazy my bar. Mitzvah down thinking about it was so I don't I can't read any Hebrew whatsoever and so we're GONNA do it in March and in January or December. My Dad's like my GRANDPA was like. Hey like I really like you travel permits for for me. Okay like sure like you want the three months. You're like fuck so I went to school for one day. I sit down. They're expecting like the building school for Bartlett's. Yes so let me let me finish so I sit down there and it's like. Oh what the folks going on everyone speaking in Hebrew. I don't know one thing I'm looking around. I started like kind of laughing at myself. Like I mean it's just knowing knowledge that I have nothing to offer here like crazy. I lasted three hours at lunchtime. I have my dad picked me up. I am never going back there. We hired this guy who taught me how to read the Torah in phonetic English. So like Baru tonight with spelled out R. U. C. H. Like it was all English and when I did my Bar Mitzvah in the synagogue. It's I was in like the center a podium and there were two people who you go one by one. They're both reading Hebrew in English. Don't go and she will hoodwinked. Here's an I. Crushed it too because it was easy just pronouncing spell uncle. Harry might not know that this might be a breaking news. Dunkel Harry though the hell this show and he's all see my Yarmulke from my from the one I went to. It was a baseball Yarmulke. I needed to know I thought literally Thirteenth Birthday Party ceremony. Laura just like a wedding ceremony and reception did you. Is that like? Did you get lifted on a chair or what? Yeah I think so. My Dad was shit faced it but they do that but the ranks. The BAR MITZVAHS. Think part of being like twelve thirteen is. You're chasing one girl whatever and it's like fun. There was one girl at every bar Mitzvah. I went to where I went in. I tried to hide myself. I'm like you know what we're GonNa talk to this one girl this one. We're going to do it like I told you. Listen I'm going to do it. I'M GONNA like go dance with her on all this every single one just coward out every single time. Been nine of them were. I just didn't have to. That's also like why. Tempt girls like the sweet sixteen to I went to like one sweet. Sixteen I into sweet sixteen. I never did personally but my friends would do it. And maybe take like I think like a little sip and pretend like I was drunk. We got caught smoking weed and my sisters Sweet Sixteen and they. They tried to throw me out of my own. I'm like I am paying all people like four. This you get a little bit of like come on man the guy the fight for my uncle. I developed not my uncle my Family friend me out but Yeah that was the only streak I could Kenia. No fire sixteenth birthday fifty teams at sounds. I feel like the music. Those are unbelievable. The families stayed. Don't stop dancing. It's awesome I screwed up. I was dating a girl in college and I found out later on that at pershing weddings they just throw like hundred dollar bills. A you at night money. It's like part of Ritu Indian weddings like a week long and you get presents all the time. Supposedly fucked up. Well I guess there's still hope but well no I was upset because I'm not married right now right Okay well this is. What a wild show Oddly Tommy Canley and all our other random shit we talked throughout will be back next week with short stay safe out there later John Sterling. You've been listening to short porch. Byproduct of Barstool sports that you left a makeup on me. You try to tell prisoner to put everything about is better by coming into Gamma Honda. Canon test views. Oh Gee I'm loan a few. It's your hand if you can you be on your last name. Head count coming. Aw heads just use common. I my dad's birthday mixture. They'd go say Happy Birthday to my fucking shout out. Your doubts on the podcast. You should birthday on Saturday right. Yeah I'll have to start pushing happy birthday forties at a on the role on the podcast. We will get them next week. Your Dad's birthdays today about the only guy who since this show all right? I'll put this in the end after the outcome song. Happy Birthday I loved to Happy Birthday town. Never all right.