Ep 129: Lexis Sharde

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Hyperbole by PODCAST and friends statement nominee to be taken literally. Well it's up seven. Piper Hyperbole. Hello everybody and welcome to hyperbole. A cell podcast for the helpless. My name is Stephanie. And I'm your host joining me today Co host Eric. Hey Hey how you doing well. How are you fantastic? I love our banter when we introduce. You Ain't now right. It's great moving on. We've also joined by a very special guest today. Everybody please welcome Lexus Chardonnay. I feel so special. You are so special. What a pleasure to have you here for having me selects is thank you for joining and we'd like you to tell the audience a little bit about yourself by your life how you got into comedy because that was pretty interesting and then what you're doing now with some of your projects like life coaching comedians. Yeah cars everything else so I kind of stumbled into comedy. I've always kind of been a fan of comedy. I don't think anyone gracefully walks comedy. It's always stumble. I started with Public Speaking Doing Radio College Radio and then I guess the Radio City Station and then I moved to La to pursue my career. I wanted to be like A. Vj like la La but like you remember like when you used to try out. Tv's WANNA be like. I don't know what that is. You don't how old are you? I was GonNa Twenty nine but I'm thirty one. You should know that by child you didn't have MTV in my house so you know who la is right. Oh my God all right you're gonNA have to look around. She's married to Kamala Anthony now but she was like remember. Trl Yes. I remember that talk about it from my position to be like the new. Trl host and they're called BJ's video jockeys so like this jockeys video jockey. I really wanted to be a video jockey so it was like. I wanted to be kind of a journalist. But like for like hip hop culture and like pop culture homing so. That's what I was pursuing when I moved to L. A. And I had for Morgan from Oregon and I was producing like a small music interview. Tv show and I had. I had a hater like on Youtube. That was like Oh my God her skills or so apple and of course I'm like Oh am I really that bad or whatever what am I co workers slash kind of manager was like you know he's like I think you're great. You're natural but there will be no harmon taking some Improv classes and brushing up on your wits. And you know you're interviewing skills and be on top of your PS and Qs and like okay so then I joined Upright Citizens Brigade and I did. I've heard of them. Yes and after doing that. I did Sketch comedy writing. I've always been a writer and took Sean Conroy Class. Who was like my favorite professor out of like all the classes I've ever took into my life and yeah and then I had a friend that was in that that did stand up comedy interest. He should do stand up. I think you'd be really good. And that's kind of how it started and that was like around two thousand ten two thousand eleven. Oh Yeah so then. I started doing comedy in L. A. Most of the time I was out there to start your a place to start and I moved out here to help with family. What my GRANDPA and kind of get a fresh start? And so like the first two years I was out here like I didn't even really know there was a comedy scene because I was stuck out in like Buckeye auto area ear so I never really got to Phoenix or Scottsdale. It like to party. And then Yeah I kind of stumbled across like the comedy clubs and started about two years ago. I started getting back into it home. That's awesome. I was reading about this article that you were in Voyage Phoenix. And you were saying you have gone through three years without that. Creative outlet was really tough. Yeah I totally agree when I'm not doing something creative. I feel like it's almost like emotional. Suicide dead inside. Yeah really are man. That's so cool. And then you have a side project or or a project. Coaching Comedians podcast and web series. Yeah why don't you tell us a little bit about that? So I've always wanted to do podcasts. Not just coming from like my radio background. And during my creatively dead inside my life I knew I WANNA do podcast. I didn't know what I wanted it to be about. At that time I was really active in Martial Arts Tracy Moi ties I was thinking about doing something about more tie and then after a while I had like really take a step back from that. Because it's just like too high intensity for me and like. I learned that with my body chemistry. I'm actually better with like Yoga. More calming type exercises instead of beating people down. Yeah Yeah it feels really good. Send to it exactly trying to do more. Brazilian Jujitsu now a little bit better and but anyway so Brazilian name or nickname. I know that's part of why I've never like really got full onto bj et CETERA. Like I've been you know trying never fits with my schedule but like eventually. I'll start doing more of that right now. It's been like Yoga and like weight lifting and stuff like that but anyway so I started doing comedy comedy. Podcast and I started talking to the comedians out there so I was talking to some comedians about what they're doing listening to other podcasts. And I wanted to do something different rather than just Kinda like even though. I love all comedy podcasts. Out there was just kind of like you know you're you're you're sitting chilling. You're talking shit kind of thing. I wanted to do. Something a little bit different. I was a personal trainer for three years and like coach sports and stuff like that too. I wanted to do something that was going to be like helpful but also humorous so after brainstorming with a friend of mine ideas. I came up with life coaching comedians. And so I invite Comedians to my house on my couch I play a character and I pretty much combines all their therapists I've ever been to into kind of like one character and that's the voice that I use and it spun because like Comedians. No I tell them up front. I'm going to be doing character about that. Yeah like I'm doing a character and it's funny because like they'll start talking to me like it's just me even though I'm clearly doing this character and some people will play along with it and they'll make shit up but for the most part a lot of people will tell me some real stuff half the time I don't know until the end that was that was great like and they're like that was all real like those are all real problems so that warrant still. Yeah so it's a really fun and even when people make up shit like I actually tried to give like real advice. Yeah so I have a lot of fun with it. It's really cool. It's a lot of fun to listen to where you're going to say something Eric. No you had your Barack Obama hand. Eric had his hand extended with the way we raise your hand around here get in on the I was I was going to say. I've listened to several episodes from season one season to season three by the time. This'll be out is out and hilarious listening to. It's great but but I was just GONNA say hilarious. It's one of the funniest podcasts that I've listened to Arizona and just in general but I think you do such a good job. I think your character hilarious and when I I listen. I think the first episode I listen. To is with Steve. This is really funny. Because he was there were points where he was trying to make it. He was getting serious. Then he'd make a joke to try and defense mechanism or something and then you just like yeah and then. He didn't know what to say up to that. So Tony be was very similar to and it had me cracking up so I had to stop listening to it at work. I listened to it when I was working out and had weights. There were very heavy that I was trying to lift so anyway but it was. It was a very good podcast. I also think your presentation the photography the website. It looked so professional that when I went to go see I was like. Wow is lexus on some TV. Show that I don't recognize but it looks awesome. Yeah I'm really big about like your brands because like whatever you do that's Your Business and putting your best foot forward and like I was a digital arts major so like everything needs to be aesthetically pleasing to me and I want people to look up my shit and be like. Oh whoa like. Why haven't I heard of this person before? Like I want that kind of approach so that makes me feel really good that you mailed it. Yeah really really good that. You like Steve's episode because that was the one that I was like always Kinda like worried about like I thought it was hilarious but it's so dry. It's very dry. That is my brand. I Love I listened to his. I listened to Bubbas. I listen to Patrick Aching and I listened to Andrea. WanNa Garland. Yeah she did it the whole time in an accent. Yeah which is really good. Yeah yeah but anyway hilarious episodes and I say keep going even though you're already gonNA keep going. Sir But I'm going to be listening and guys if you have not it's going to be in the show notes subscribe and listen. Give him likes reviews everything. Yeah you also made us feel like Shit because I looked at my art and I was like wow I look. This looks awful. How inspiring US this? Step up our game a little bit. We were going for that. Go City's website luck it's awesome. Yeah thank you for joining us Let's go ahead and get into the self-help part of this podcast Jewett. That's my special too happy about expectations. Yeah so don't fuck it up so ruined some people's lives today we like to get ourselves centered and started with an inspirational quote And I I like to take this time. Ask Our guests. If you have any inspirational quotes that helped. Get you through your days. Push you to be a better person is smart is beautiful at is strong so I go. I think it was from the help or something. I don't know positive mantras in the mirror in the morning. I don't know enough I'm strong. Gosh darn that people like me exactly. Well that's awesome. We like to get quotes and the the source of quotes is inspired dot. It's a robot that uses a I to take some of the most motivational words in the universe. Mash them together for the most perfect inspirational quote. So Eric would you like to read this week quote from Inspire Robot? This image was found by our Fran. Our Fran our Fran our friend. Fran rainy home my friend did anyone tell you. You're looking. Undisputed indisputably unusually shiny today. What a weird ask quote here. I got to read it again. Hello my friend. Did anyone tell you that? You are looking indisputably unusually shiny today. If someone said that to me I would immediately go into the bathroom and bought my face. Yeah true might be perceived as a bad thing. Yeah so maybe. That's what inspire about telling us to do a little too shiny so we just need navy bright. It'd be a better word than shiny glowing. Yeah I liked that scintillating. Glowing could be taken the wrong way though to like translate. I look pregnant straight. Use just cut right to the right to it. You look pregnant yeah told you look indisputably pregnant. Unusually usually pregnant. I feel like we kind of nailed it. I think we nailed it. Shine ourselves up and get to the meaty part of the podcast and this is called. The beef is the media part where we have questions from fans from across the Internet. We GIVE CELEB- Advice. We give business advice. We have words pretty much everything that encapsulates a good self help podcast. So let's get started with the first question this is from read it. It was found and retrieved by our fan troy. Thank you so much troy. Go ahead and read this. How can you scare a dog away? Dogs come up to me sometimes and it seems like they WanNa bite me. I hear people say just remain with dogs and not look them in the eye and that's ridiculous. These rules only make the more problematic. How can I successfully scurr dog away sincerely rough stuff? Oh my God so I think we're all cat people. Actually we talked about this before the podcast so you you have two cats. I have two cats or lexus. Jobs who cats. I have two cats Arugula three two and a half two and a half one wants Farrell farrel account. I like dogs. I like dogs too. Yeah I'm not anti dog dog. Same I mean I could give advice how to scare dog away but I think the real issue here rough stuff is your character. You can just go by rough yet. Yeah rough your problems. Your character dogs are amazing judges of character and so the reason. Why Dog WanNa Bite? You is because you're a piece of shit in where they work on yourself or bite the dog on the ear like keeping gooding junior and snow dogs. Oh my God did he. Do that dominance. The fact that character makes me think that they should post dogs up. If you're going to go for a dog in a job interview you can make it past bills. The job is years. Yeah Round One rottweiler. Australian shepherds are like the best when it comes to judgment of character. Okay yeah those Ozzy's no what's up. Hey make crikey smell kind of right. You're if you guys want to watch something in Australian go watch Zomba's just desserts on net flicks desserts. Yes and it's in Australia and Australian. You can have it dubbed in American if you want to know really the dubbed part. Yeah Oh no I don't think England I know I know that area but it's great. It's this goofy goofy ball dude named Adriana Zomba and he. It's competitive baking show where all these. Australians have to make desserts inspired by some sort of theme and it's incredible and it's also an Australian so that part makes my day sometimes crocodile. Meat may make. It's a crocodile tot anyway. Let's get back to the character of this. Very shitty person asked this question so become a better person. Maybe mark your territories who or on the dog or on the dog but sniff their rump. That might be a good one to just getting friendly with them at that point they might want. That's yeah that's asking for too much. You don't want the red lipstick to come out now. The reason why I don't want a dog you could get a girl dog. Red Lips it goes. Oh my God. I don't WanNa talk about that all right anything else before we move on. Now just work on yourself rough workouts. Yes very rough around the edges so Joel smear. They're so concerned about what dogs think about. You be concerned about how exactly exactly you shouldn't give a shit about how dogs think about. How should he have a person? You are better all right. Moving on. We're going to go on to the next segment and this is celeb- advice. Celebs may seem like I. Always fuck slips may seem like near perfect examples of human beings and they are but they get into pickle sometimes too which is why we dedicate a segment of our show to give them even more attention. It's time for CELEB- advice now. This is the part of the gas. Lexus where we ask our guests if they can do a celebrity impression. Can you do a celebrity impression of any kind? I think you can I. Am I supposed to do who doing the quote though? No you don't have to you can do any CELEB- impression okay. Are you going to do and GonNa Guess sure? I'm really bad because I guess Tom Hanks on your this. No no no no. We go outside. What do you got yeah? Hey guys if you haven't checked out my new makeup line. Yeah and my sister's new make up line issue totally gone through our website. Check it out and don't forget to like Subscribe Follow Best Elizabeth Warren. I've ever that's good. Thanks for the Warriors Kim or Kendall. Yeah can you do a? I don't know anything meals. I wouldn't even Scott. Is that the boyfriend of Courtney. Scott Disick yes. Got This yeah. I don't know what they're not together for a long time. I mean I don't know I haven't but last time I checked I took a break on keeping up with the Kardashians resembles just desert. So it's been a while longer keeping up with well. That's a very good impression. Eric do you have any this week? Eric's pretty just churns them out. He just go for quantity over quality. We're working will work out of. Here's here's a Futurama yeah here. Here's my doctors Lloyd Berg so now. That's a really Good Elizabeth Warren. No it's really good. I'm a darker. Now Open your mouth about no the other one. That's really good. That's pretty good. Yeah I'm sometimes they just come to me and better. When I don't do them on the spot I can impersonate like rural life. People better too and I spend enough time with them like I can do pretty good impersonation nations like managers and Shit and always fun. Oh Nice yeah comes in handy. I like that well. I'm a little scared. I don't want you to do an impression. Can you do an impression of us? You probably can. I'm really just boring. Sonorous white guy or motorised offered her SOPO. Now's lexus guys. Those Little Navy after a couple of hours okay. Yeah all right. Yeah I'M GONNA try and mix my tone my intonation guessing all right. Let's dig into this now. This juicy gas comes from Perez Hilton. Only the most trustworthy sources totally. Eric would you like to read this? Will let's do it to make it interesting to your voice and then whenever there's a quote or somebody speaking you Lexus. In will chime in yes and do that will be great. Okay so I think I'll be Veronica. Morale is and you can be beyond say and the and say okay. If you WANNA switch switch academic be Eric Takeaway. Bianca IS RUMORED. Alumina ties brought up in a trademark battle over the name. Blue Ivy. Just when we thought we were done with that luminosity mess of women battling beyond say over the name. Blue I V. Is brought up the years old conspiracy theory in a new. Legal Filing Veronica. Morale is back in Gore fighting the superstar and their two year trademark or the rights to Blue Ivy. Both the name of Bays Daughter Blue Ivy Carter and morale is wedding. Planning Company on the singer tried to obtain the trademark for her Z's eldest daughter's name what trademarking the name. Oh yeah all right. The morale is argued that she was already using it for her business. Now the case is headed to trial with the wedding planner insisting the rumors that Queen Bee secretly worships Satan is hurting her and is hurting. Her brand morale is response came after the single ladies. Performer explained her argument for being granted the trademarks dating. Blue Abbvie Carter is a cultural icon. Who has been described as a mini Staus ta and has been celebrated for her fashion moments over the years. Her life and activities are followed extensively by the media and cultural icon or not Morales says Yang say committed fraud by violate trademark without planning to use it in the marketplace to make matters worse the undying rumors that Blue Eyes. These parents are members of an evil underground secret. Society is barely causing further harm to her business. She writes many members of the general public believed. The carters are members of the so-called illumine naughty and the name of their daughter spelled backwards is elevate which in Latin is translated to. Lucifer's daughter if it's not for the record. Morale is asking the Trademark Board to deny beyond his trademark completely. What do you think who will win the ongoing gaze bow down? Which is I think pres- Hilton really knows their stuff. Because just when you're about to zone out they'll throw a curve ball like Yawn. Say or pay attention to me. Listen to my story bullshit. Yeah what the by the way. What the actual hell in this article. What's going on here is Bay? Really worshiping say so myself at one part one point my life. When I was pregnant and had insomnia I would stay up late in binge on youtube videos about the luminosity. I thought you were going to say worship. Say Rosemary's baby situation and I mean they come up with stuff to make it so believable like I love conspiracy theories but I don't know man I don't know really I don't know so it could be. I don't know it could be good. Bay Doesn't put my worries at bay but do you think that I think that for the case of not making her a Satan worship. I think she's not because she sings songs with Halos in them. Like the song called Halo. Understand you gotta just like the the name of the daughter spell it backwards and Oh so if you play a backwards Satan Lady Gaga. I did come out about signer. Soul to the devil really is yeah. She talks about it and she said ever since it happens. She's had like really bad muscle. Spasms are so painful that she can't move but she's a millionaire now. Yeah okay so the devil delivered. It's called a monkey's paw you ask for the Unintended consequence I should have been the word of the week. I like that a monkey's paw next week. I watched the documentary. But I'd glossed over the part. She sold her soul. The maybe I did. She talked about it. She said she was out as after one of her performances. Us looking to score some coke in this man approached her and was like Gee WanNa be a star. She felt you anything she talks. All about skies is Bradley Cooper a interesting so I mean it could be is what you're saying it could be Eric. What are your thoughts? I just love that. They think spelling the name. Okay it is so clearly you can just check. You could literally put you evey into Google translate and say Latin to English wasn't saying oh I don't know but it's probably not Lucifer's daughter track because I think Lucifer. Yeah I'm pretty sure Lucifer is Latin. I'm doing it I'm trying to do is okay. You do it while I talk. Keep your eyes on the road. I'm sorry I'm sorry keep driving this. I Jay Z's to chill to worship Satan. Okay first of all. I want to a concert. Jay Z and Kanye and this is when I was living in La Okay and it was when they did that. Watch the throne tour and so there are filming that video and so every show. They played that Song like ten times at the end because they're filming and they're getting like shots of the audience. When Jay z some of his performances he was throwing up the Rock and then flames coming out of the stage and it was like super fucking hot and me and my brother. We're like we're not the rock. We're not doing it. Like Haas Uber. Fucking hot isn't really sexy. No it was like the rug. That's like flames everywhere and we're looking at. It looked like Colt like you know. Yeah Kinda creepy. Maybe that's why Jay z separated or is no longer that close with COGNAC. Because they found the light and he's straight of preaching everywhere. Yeah and Jay z's like M- devil all the way through up the rock rock. Yeah but yeah. I saw the rolling stones years ago and they use it pyrotechnics and I was just worried. Mick Jagger was going to go up in flames like Michael Jackson style. Yeah well I mean if you look at all like the really hardest always some sort of like pyramid art work on like their clothes or their album artwork or you know like their child's name who's the most obvious illuminated artists. Madonna really without hesitation. Donna Donna why's that duty after? Sucks the souls from young boys and tell if you look at like I mean again I obsess over Lola Manati conspiracy theory and they talk about they. They relate all the female artists that they are supposed part of the luminosity to Cleopatra and how Cleopatra took power over like the other shoulder soldiers and like her like community of people and how she's makeup and how she's like metals and silvers and stuff to like get attention into Natasha's men. And if you look at Madonna Madonna was like the first one to do it and then like beyond kind of the footsteps and like if you watch a performance issues always wearing something that looks kind of nude and she has some sort of like metal like it's crazy a shiny naked lady. That's fanny naked. Lady you look undeniably shiny. Today my friend. Oh she listened to expire by Rigo are usually. We're getting out there and just go down that rabbit hole you really want to. I've got the time now. Let's skip over it all right. So yes or no and then we'll move on. I say yes. They totally worships the Devil. And well wait wait. Wait Oh yeah this guy. I don't really care about that. Is Wife trying to trademark the baby's name? Yeah what did I duNno? It's kind of like you know black black people in general and like Latino families and black families that's like you know they get a credit card and their daughter's name their kid's name when they're like five stars start building that right. This is the next step up from that. Like they don't need the credit so they're going to trade up from that is just getting the domain name. Yeah IT'D BE DOT COM. You don't need to bring the US government into this. Yeah it's just the next step up. So we have not broken. Those generational trait generational chains patterns and black. America does very important fiesta. If you if you trademark if they trademark name does that mean nobody can name their child or they have to say it like technically. You can't even say it. It's like I couldn't name my kid chips Ahoy because it's yeah okay. Put It on. T. Shirt you couldn't like unless it's period that's like let's get ready to rumble. Trademark darn by whom by by superb all. It's got to be the big game. Come on come on by Antrix for the big game really. Tv is on sale for the big game. Did you guys know that? Lamar Not Lamar Lebron James. He tried to trademark talk. Tuesday that's the name of his kid coincidental all right moving on. We're going to a quick break for our sponsor. Hey Stephan here. Have you ever thought about making a podcast? It may seem complicated but anchor makes it easy. Let me explain. It's free? That means you don't have to spend any of your hard earned Cheddar to get your voice out to the world. It's easy there are creation tools that allow you to record. And Edit your podcast from your phone or computer anchor will also distribute your podcast for you. So it can be heard on spotify apple podcasts. And so much more you can also make money from your podcast with no minimum listenership. It's everything you need to make a podcast in one place. So what are you waiting for? Download the free anchor APP or go to anchor dot. Fm to get started and welcome back. We injected in our all right. Welcome back we're going to move on to the word of the week and we have a word of the week because we classify ourselves is an entertainment podcast and apple podcasts. So we have to teach you at least one thing so the word this week. I don't know how to pronounce it but I'm GonNa try athetic habitually suspending judgement or given skepticism. So meaning that you're not judging people. Yeah I think those are two contradictory things right. Habitually suspending judgement is not giving judgment right and then give skepticism is being skeptical. Terrible word. Horrible word we're going to. We're going to edit it out and post. I don't have to be skeptical about it or not. Our that's very athletic. I'm habitually not ever going to use. The word. Athletic is pathetic. There you go all right moving on we're going into the next segment and this is Biz quizzes so we want to help business owners and we've created a segment called Biz quizzes. Where we take a one star review quizzes on his business and give advice to the Biz on how to clean that Wiz so guys this week. The whining pig bar has its patrons squealing but now with the Light Lexus. Would you like to are you? Okay with react can read okay. Okay given the context Larry. Ale Isn't may just disappoint. I didn't really hate it. I just expect more no food whatsoever. Not even peanuts or other snipe tap type items. I guess it's just a place to come and drink. They weren't many other people in there in the ones that were there. We're not socializing at all just sitting silently and drinking one bearing never to return never to return. I keep going. Oh No that. That's it. Yeah that was so we. We can ruminate on that review so this is a bar and those guys just complaining that the it's not a restaurant is this a yelp review. This is from Google. Yeah yeah a one star of you from Google. Yeah how dare people just go into a bar and have a beer then leave Brenner? Yeah one-star I mean. He's complaining that there's no food when the bar right. I mean what do you want like pickled eggs and shit like sounds like Larry's the whining pig? Now Larry? The loser want a bitch. I love his poetic last line. Now one bearing gone never to return ever to return in countries like a cowboy. I know Okay Eric. Would you like to read the next review? What name is heavily? H. E. L. I it's Greek really. I know a guy. I think it's short for helicopter. Helen or that. Yeah that's much more practice. There was an option for zero starts. I would give it to this place. Never been there before and I tried to get here for the first time and the guy at the door told me my group that he can't he can't even let us in because we look intoxicated. Got This lady rates. Like she's Larry Hills girlfriend. I Love How these star givers have type. We literally had just ride to the area trying to celebrate my best friends. Beat a we were just hipped up looking for a good night out in this happens even think he had a fair reason to act out this way but anyway just leaving this honest view of our experience in case anyone else goes through the same scenario. We felt discriminated because he had no proof of us being intoxicated to refrain from getting in. Done what you're saying done from the for the review or done with the place at a bladder. She said scenario and she says she was discriminated against. So I'm assuming that she's Mexican. That's a good guess. I also think that she made so many typos that she was drunk when she left so there may be good reason that they didn't get in. Yeah maybe she was just intoxicated. If there was an option for zero starts. I will give it to this place For the for the letter. B. In the number four right. Nobody does that except for alcoholics. Or if you're an. Aol Chat Room. I forgot about. Aol Chat and then refrained like so. She's somewhat educated she. She used at the source. I was GONNA say or. She knows that domain for ask she was writing the Google. I also for not let us Romaine all right. I think we're good with that. So any advice for the whining pig. Stop whining bitches or wasting your energy right. Maybe they should have a slogan or a sign at the door. That's like no only why no whining. Anyway let's move on shall we? Shall we guys? This is the sad part. It's the last question okay. Don't sound too excited about it. Let's shut now all right question. Three's from read it or the last question from read it. What should I say this girl? I'm snap channing. Science this girl that likes me we snapchat constantly but it's just like blank pictures with captions and it feels like every day gets more and more awkward. Neither of US say anything. She goes to my school but I don't really know anything about her. And I feel I could dick if I just keep sending boring snaps and she's probably waiting for me to make a move or something. We only had one conversation on snap and it was dry and lasted like ten minutes. Don't really know where to go from here. Sincerely flirting with no filter. Dude grow up here balls. Is that a fucking thing to send pictures. Blink pictures with no captions. What does that mean? This is a white screen. I don't know if they're sending pictures of themselves. I don't know like I get it. I thought it was just blank. No pictures the whites. Maybe I don't Know No. I think there's more sense because I would get like it's just like inside someone's pocket. Okay Buddy obviously you want to know if this girl's into you so have you snapped a lot lexus. Oh Yeah you're on top of your snapchat. I mean I don't do it as much as it used to. But if I put my snapchat right now in my lifetime I have snapped thirty two thousand sixty one times. Wow all my God. I think I've snapped snapped thirty two snapchat since like when it first came out really. Are you still an active user or just snap? A lot of cabinet is nice. Nice do snap Eric. I not once you're snaps. Wow Thanos would be disappointed G. and it's pretty on point two so I'm excited about that. But anyway what was this kid's name flirting with learning with her no filter? I think you should just go ahead and snap a picture of your Dick Away. He's in high school so I can't adviser because that's child pornography six. It's very tiny high school or schools that he writes. Yeah I don't know where to go from here. Yeah maybe you could do it. If Your Dad's Dick then they this is what my diction twenty five years. Give you something to look forward to. Okay forced him Saturday. Start a conversation. I think that's so crazy that like we're so disconnected through social media that you can't even like be honest through screen like there's so many dogs out there and you can't even like say like. Hey what's the you know? I want to halt for a second and turn around and go back to that term thumb thugs dumb thug in thug. No I love that thuggish someone. That's constantly on bully on you know on twitter okay. To constantly thumb wrestling fell. But I'm happy broke command. Sorry you were saying. I'm just saying like yeah like dude. What's the worst that's going to happen? Just GonNa follow you or like avoid eye contact with the at school. Sounds like you guys don't even have conversations in real life. I feel like what are you going to do? In real life on social media where you have this blanket of time and not being able to see her reaction it gives. It should give you a little extra courage right right. Say things be vulnerable? Live your life. Allow yourself to feel or else. You're not living flirting with. No filter. Stopped being a pussy was that was that. Alexa shy life coach. Now not really. That was just like I was just annoyed lex eight. Yeah I mean I get it. I was there once but don't follow mistakes. I'm being a shy it. It just go for it. I was shy to. You'RE GONNA be the same place you were if she says no you know maybe just pretend it's like someone you know in her comfortable with. Yeah I'll just say hey what's up mom or what's your favorite color like. Yeah I like that. It's starting to starting off basic and then delve into deeper shit like that. It's not that hard. Yeah Eric what were you gonNa say something? You had your Obama handout again. Yeah my Obama Hand. You can tell. He says he just keeps sending Boring Snap. So maybe maybe spice it up a bit make it make. It seem like you're doing something death defying. Yeah Par Court by Park. Go hang off the side of a building. Yeah Okay yourself backup animals. You could take snaps of your animals. There you go. That's a good easy way isn't it? Yeah and do little puns. Like your perfect for mayors jokes. Yeah is that good? Is that effective dad jokes personally. My Co workers do not like that. I'm like a huge sucker for any sort of play on words. I like that too but every time I do that at work I feel like my jokes farts now because everybody makes a weird face and walks away. I think suits you can. Yeah you sound like you got some lame co work. Yeah that's right yeah. I'm definitely hilarious. But were you gonNA say something? Eric say something Eric. So what do you think all right I was saying spice it up? Go make make her think like she has to save your life. Make her come to you like help. I'm trapped in near the only chat was tied up by a bigger. Don't take Eric's vice dude. Yeah women don't like Pussy unless you want a lesbian girlfriend. That still likes feminine men. You can do yourself tied up in the train tracks but like Dick Pic. So you're still open. She's Independent. You could find out right away. That conversation overweight looking for dumb. Yeah Hey please save me. That would be the most embarrassing. Yeah ran over. Your pants are down. Your Dick was hard for sure. Oh you're saying you get ran over. I think you've got bigger problems. Yeah Yeah but what a what a way to be. Immortalized like yeah. He was really college pants down flirting with no filter to flirting with DUB Florida. Gosh all right guys well. This was so much fun. Lexus thank you so much for joining us. Hey you're going to say you want me now anyway. Where can people find you? What do you have to promote? Tell us all about what's going on so our fans can just drink you. Pick me up. Glass of water. Overflowing Sparkle Years Still Arizona Tags. More hydrating amounts of calcium. I am available on lots of social media platforms Lexus Chardonnay lax. I S. H. A. R. D. Chardonnay Not Chard Chardonnay. I finally started an instagram page for my podcast life coaching Comedians. But I'm on twitter. I'm on Instagram facebook on snapchat. I'm Alexa bubbles with three X's because I'm triple X. rated with my cats on there so you can follow me on Cat Dick Pics. Yeah Cat porn for sure and you can find my podcast on pretty much all the podcasts streaming platforms. Have a big event coming up at stir crazy. I was also going to say Youtube. Lex Luther. You tips lex Luther. Oh God now I was going to change it but I've had that username for so long. I just left it but if you search life. Coaching comedians on you to be confined my stuff but yeah big event on March Fifteenth. At stir crazy it's alive podcasts. Event called the group sessions. Maybe me and seven other comedians. They'll be three monologue stand up performances and there'll be a group session with me and four other comedians. It's long form. Improv. It's GonNa be really fun. That's amazing ally and then if you send me the link you sent me the link and I'm going to put it in the show notes along with links to all the other social platforms your website and everything as of today. There's less than ninety tickets left and it's in two weeks so damn that's awesome seats bitches. I think we should go eric for sure. I would love for you guys to come. We would love to come to any a lot of fun. That's awesome excited and season three of life. Coaching COMEDIANS COMES OUT MARCH fifth. Which this will come out in the next week. So Nice. Are you going to do it? Slowly where you do episode one episode a Week. Or are YOU GONNA? Before? I'M GONNA try to go as long as they can this season. I've been recording a lot and I've been getting some Twang comics. I got rich foss on the season I saw. That's amazing excited about that. Yeah so opening up with Mike Turner who just moved to La. I was really happy to get him on before he left. And a Lotta returning people. This season a lot of new people fun. How many episodes are they? GonNa be in total. I don't know I'm GonNa keep going until I'm ready to take a break. Oh can I just want to keep a little bit more consistent this time around because I was doing apes eight episodes of season? But I've been getting enough. Traction now that a lot of people that are wanting to be on it so and I got like my system down for post production so getting them knocked out pretty quick. God's awesome that's Great. Oh the one woman show well good for you really want to give you a round of applause mentally. Not It's too loud and rambunctious. You're doing a great job. Keep doing what you're doing and it's really cool to see what you're doing and here it when I'm at work or lifting weights or whatever. Yeah anyway fans by the way subscribed to her podcast. And and if you haven't yet subscribed to ours to billy's leave a review tell a friend but seriously leave a review because it's so fucking easy. Just do it and yeah just follow us on. Instagram at hyperbole. Podcast this will all be in the show notes to Eric. Do you have anything to plug any shows coming up? Not by the time. This is coming out. Okay Sweet Ara guys. Well thank you not even on. Snapchat. Don't take it as vice even on snapchat all right. Well thank you. Thank you thank you guys. We'll talk next week. Bye Bye hyperbole hyperbole.

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