Marsha Sims -- MAKING THE MOST OF QUARANTINE
Hi Everyone. This is your life coach. Debra Brown welcoming you to taking a leak. Or guest today is Marsha since? MARSHA SIMS is a professional organizer with over twenty five years of experience in the organizing industry. She's the founder and president of Sorts Out Inc.. The leading professional organizing companies South Florida. And is recognized as one of the top professional organizers in the country. She has authored five popular books on organizing including the best selling organizing your day. smarts office organizing. Five days to a clutter, free hosts and ten time management choices. Marcia as a local national and international speaker as well as an active toast master. and has earned the coveted dtm distinguished toast master. Designation. She has been interviewed extensively in the media and has been featured in national magazines, including women's Day better homes, and Gardens Women's World Self and family circle. Marshes approach mother, three adult sons, and her idea of fun is helping people who've lost hope of being. Used regain the control over their lives. They feel they've lost welcome to the show Barsha. Good Morning. It is absolutely a pleasure to be here. To pleasure to have you. So the first question I have for you. Is What has been your biggest leap in life. When you look back. When have you step outside of your comfort zone and done something big? Oh what a good question! I think my biggest leap. was when I radically changed my diet. News ago. But you know what I've I've got a lot of big leagues because I. Don't have a problem with making a change. So if something needs to be changed. I'll do it and I. I changed my Diet several times, but I think the biggest one was when I went totally raw Vegan, I like to say I went from Macaroni Grill. EAT like everybody. To to raw vegan and I did it in like a week. And I did it because I thought that I wasn't okay. My blood pressure was too high. They could never get it to normal. The kept wanting me to be on more and more medicine. And someone I went to this. And she told me that if I changed my diet that that pressure would go back to normal and sure enough. It did I, did it for two and a half years? And, I fell right back off the wagon. Where right back to normal food and I got on the only results that I had before I did it. But. Then I but I've done all kinds of done every diet than all the every day they make. On the Kito Diet for a long time I'm done all he have to I think that sounds pretty drastic. Going to raw vegan from macaroni grill to raw vegan like that just sounds really extreme to me. How did you just make that change so quickly I? Mean obviously your health was a concern, but. Just in making the move. The mindset, and all of that. How did you make that happen when you? When you were scared. You can do anything. It's amazing to point. Flying, in and all of a sudden, all of the obstacles all the. Nation all the things you think you can't do. You figure out that Jesse can, if you get scared and I got scared. So. Now that that's that's an excellent point. So Marshall. I wanted you on the show. because. You're one of those people. Move. I guess in the good times the bad times. A life is great for you. And as I thought. Virus period. You know this this whole. What three months journey that the world has been on, you could say. Where people have dealt with it. In different ways, some people have thrived. Then some people have not. And Wanted to get your take on this whole thing. I have to ask if you've been driving, you just drive through everything. So well. What else? Here's the thing, right? We make our own circumstances. Your circumstances in your opinion. You can change your opinion. So, we're stuck at home. So, what can you do at home that you've always wanted to do? You know a lot of teaching. Well, you know a lot of people Wanna get organized, which plays right into what I do, but. You know suppose there's books you've always wanted to read well, you could read them now. Suppose you said always said I wish I could spend more time with my kids. Guess what you can spend more time with your kids right now like this. This is an opportunity to clean up and do all the things you always said you wanted to do. The problem is we spend that time looking at media looking at all this bad, and this is wrong, and this is sensational and I don't like this and this person said this and. No turn that off and get on with your life. There has never been times that are good. But there have always been times that are good for some people. There's never been times that are bad for everyone. You know even doing during slavery. There was a lady who made a fortune driving around creating and selling hair. CARE products to slaves I mean this always something positive. If you look in the right direction, and there's always something negative, no matter how good times are. There are people who are sad depressed, upset and grief. So it's. It's all your opinion. I heard. I heard a guy one time. He said he said my life hasn't improved, but my opinion about my life improved my outlook on my life and. I thought that, is so he really? All. Yeah so I stand like everybody else and depressed I. Mean I'm normal, I haven't been normal human emotions, but. I have tools that I use so when I get depressed I journal. And when I journal I get answers. When I get angry, I read. And so I have tools. Or like like for example. I tell my every year I. Tell Myself I'm going to clean up my filing cabinets and get rid of some of them because I, don't I? Don't go look them. I mean that stuff is on paper. My life is online. When I don't really do it. Because I. Don't feel like it today. Next Day feel like next day I. Don't feel like it, but you're feeling. Are What create your light so if you really want to accomplish something? Start doing it. I I like having that inside. Scoop to you the organizer. Because something tells me that you may not be as organized. As we think you should be. Like you have the same the same, at Mito I should know that drawer I should do yeah. Yeah. Knowing that you have all the tactics. What keeps you? Delaying such things for yourself. Okay so I. Let me quote Unquote, my co author, she says the best thing ever she says. The difference between organized people and people who are not organized is that organized to people just do what they have to do and disorganized people have to feel like doing it i. and therein lies metropolis. I don't feel like it. So if I want to do something, I have to ignore how I feel about it and start doing it. There's somebody I don't know who and I don't remember exactly, but something about you know that doing something is where the genius is. You know you don't have to be genius. You just have to do stuff. a friend of mine from toastmasters long long time ago, used to say that the secret of success is showing up much just be there. You know just do what you need to do. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to feel like it. I could easily do my file if I felt like it, so if I ignore fact that I don't feel like it, I can get it done. He. Yeah. It's not all about feeling kind of exercise a lot of us. We don't really awesome. But once we get there once. We ignore what we feel and go with what we knew we we need to do. You get it done. Get into action as you say. That's right, and it's the same dynamic exercising dieting and organizing same dynamic. It's something that if we did it. We know our lives would be better, but we don't do it because we don't feel like it and the moment. So, you look back at all the years. You didn't feel like exercising. And look at the result. So. What do we do today? Start Look at all the years. You didn't feel like organizing stuff, so look at the result. So. What did we did? Start same thing with diet all the years I don't want to give up that I wanna eat that Candy Bar I? WanNa eat things with sugar rental. And I WANNA eat things with sugar and I'm, too. I just don't anymore. Because I don't want the result. He. You know one thing that I have noticed a lot of people have spoken about. during the quarantine time is the fact that they've taken on a lot of at home projects while it. Might as well right. All. Over the honeydew, list The husbands are. Yeah that's right, and and you shared because we have an opportunity and it may not come back. I mean eventually whatever happens is going to happen in. This virus is going to be gone, and life will go back to normal. Will you look back and regret that you didn't do things that you always wanted to do? You know yeah. I'd pulls out my sewing machine. I pulled out my sewing machine, I my sewing machine and then in my closet for probably twenty years. I never I never did my mending. 'CAUSE I didn't feel like it, so I would. Donate it and I pulled out my sewing machine. What happened was I was trying to a a dollar tree, the and my boyfriend, trying to go into a dollar tree, and they had a sign. That said we couldn't go in unless we had on a mask. And I believe that and I said I'm not gonNA spend a nickel a mask. I know how to sell so I dusted off my sewing. Machine and I started making Matt. It's just kind of happened like that. I'M GONNA get kicked out of one dollar tree. Please come on. You Know GonNa. Kick me out if I'm going to get kicked out of a store. I WANNA kicked out of. High end store them on a diet. Because online. No, you're actually. Selling my. All of a sudden. On there that you never anticipated. Yeah, that's true. I absolutely did not anticipate as you know I had no intention of selling mass at all. But it more. People kept asking me and so reluctantly make them a mask, and then more people asked, and then my family got involved, and they all wanted math and one thing led to another, and you know so now. Yes, I and I have a friend who said WHO I made a mask for because he was helping me do something else and he's Oh. Oh, this is great. I'M GONNA make a website so I'll probably end up having a mask website. And this was completely unintentional. So, so what that actually shows us is that me him discover new talents. New Business. Like this when everybody thinks that everything is shut, no there there are. Is. That's true and the other side of it is. You can't buy Jigsaw Puzzles in the store anymore. My my little hobby was Jigsaw Puzzles I love to do apples. I just due to me, Jigsaw. Puzzles defined my life. My life is all messed up. Everything was off scattered and slowly put it altogether. So what people see is together. But it didn't start out like that. It was all like everything else like everybody. Else's everything else, so I I liked I liked putting jigsaw puzzles together I. Don't do anything with Mike Glue them together and put them in a pile, but but I like the makeup. And because of that. I couldn't by Jigsaw Puzzles and to me. Making mask is like a jigsaw puzzle. I take a piece of fabric active. CUT It out and. Things out, and you have to sell them together and so putting things together on still creating something so I have time now. Because I can't go anywhere. I use my jigsaw puzzle time to make masks to me. It's the same basic thing. Except, you know I can get a return. My son asked me one time he said. What are you spending on fabric? And I said it doesn't matter. I said I'm spending less money on fabric. When I used to spend on jigsaw puzzles, but jigsaw puzzle I couldn't get anything back. As you talk about the Jigsaw Puzzles I remember seeing an interview with the CEO of Walmart and the question he was asked was. What trends have you seen in in customer? Spending And he said the first few the first month. Let's say of the of the quarantine. It was all about getting things jigsaw puzzle. Home? And we've been to grooming products. He said. Talking about haircuts and everything, right? You said something earlier a boat whether we would look back and regret the time that we had this Florentine period. That has pretty much been put on us. and. It occurred to me that. There are so many people who made the passing commenced. Costs I wish I had a break. I wish I had more time and all of a sudden. We got the time right. That's right. Your wishes granted right. What you ask for because you just might get. Get it. Right. Exactly yeah. Those people. Are Using it. The way. That is. Right the people who used to complain to me that they never had enough time to spend with their family are now complaining that their kids are getting on their nerves tired of home schooling their husbands a problem. Same people same thing and so when people call me and tell me their depressed. The first thing I ask is how much time are you spending on media? Use, that will make you depressed. To turn it off. Turn on music. Turn on comedy. Turn on silent. Truly, yeah Halloween making good use of this time. What is the worst thing that you have been through your life that by media, other people standard. You should not have come out of it as gracefully as you did. What off. For you. Oh! Yeah, there are a couple of those. Okay, so when I decided. I did not want to be married to my ex. Husband anymore had three little kids. One was just out of diapers and then I had like. Three, three five and Nine eight or nine like that. And my ex husband decided that he. Did Not. Want to support that he didn't want to support my decision. And therefore he absolutely never paid child support ever ever ever. He gave me five hundred dollars in life one time. So I never got child support and I. I was on my own with a small business that was pretty new, and I had to figure out how to make it work, and we had to me on my three sons. We had to figure out how to make it work. And that was very tough. There were times we just did not have what we needed. I didn't how money my car broke down and my dad said he wasn't going to pay. It wasn't a loan. You the money to fix it, so I was on my own, and I had to figure it out. And I had to land on my feet and I only knew one thing I had one overriding mantra that that I used for my life, and that was that my three sons had to go to college and graduate. And? I'm in hindsight. I'm glad I. Put that in graduate thing on it because a lot of people go to college. But they don't graduate, and so that's all. They knew all their lives. You know you may not go to this screaming and have to go to school today. You may not feel like you need a break you. May You know whatever? Long as you now you're going to go to college and graduate. It was like you know there's a story about you know. They tie elephant to a state when they're babies. The elephant remembers that and they will never try to pull the stakeout easily, though as a big adult. They could easily pull the stake, but they don't know because in their mind tied to that steak and that I said if my kids always believe that they have to go to college and graduate, then they will do it at a point. I'll be free. Because when they grow up I. Don't WanNa have to support them anymore and now. They're all you know self-employed enough. They're all employ gainfully employed. That's the word they all graduated from college. They're all gainfully employed, and now not only do they not leave my money, but they've been able to send money. Which is nice, they don't act. But they can you know what I mean? It's like. They can and they. You know so. They appreciate that and I was there. It was you know it was me and my three sons We had to do everything together. There were meetings I couldn't go to. Because I didn't have a babysitter. There were things I couldn't participate in. My friends were traveling and doing all that fun stuff. I couldn't go anywhere. I have three little kids. I think that was probably. The biggest jolt because I never expected to be a single parent. Yeah I, always I. You know that that was not my and I certainly was not expecting to be a single parent without child support. gave so I got. No, so that was that was probably the biggest. Maybe given that because I hear quite a few challenges in there. For the person who is going through something similar interns in terms of the finances you know having less than they would like. probably a relationship that has gone. Wrong. Yeah. What would be your advice? Give me three things. You would tell that individual who is facing. Some of the biggest crises you could say. During a time like this? Well. Okay number one. The absolute most important thing is stopped being a victim. Stop playing the victim role because as long as you let some other thing. You're blaming something else. Then you're focuses on blaming and your focus isn't on what you can do for you. You can do things for you, and you can be okay, but you have to know that it all rides on you and nobody else is going to help you, so that's number one is stop playing victim role. One day it hit me. Was, walking probably walking with three them because we were always together. and. I realized that. You know my ex husband was gone. That was over. And this is what we had. We had exactly what we have. We don't have more than that. We don't have less than that. Things are not better than that I was no fantasy at that point it became. This is this is my life. This is what I have to work and so when I stopped being a victims I, could I could then. I was in control. That's number one. The second thing is once. You know you're in control then you can look at. What can you do? You know if the problem is your finances, what can you do? To make some extra money like I, pulled out my sewing machine and I make mass. There's something you can do. Can you be a consulted? Can you make something? Can you help somebody do something? and. This is about helping somebody. Do something it's not about what can you get? It's about what can you give when you start looking at? What can you give? Think about it in that way. There is something that you can give that. Somebody will pay you for just about every entrepreneur I know needs a virtual assistant. You know. Everybody with children need somebody to Babysit our help out on occasion. Everything needs to be cleaned. You know there's something you can do, but you have to look at it from the perspective of what you can do not the perspective of what you don't have. In terms of relationships realize you cannot control other people. You cannot make somebody love you like you want you. You can't do that. So. Don't regret it. Move Forward. So I have techniques because I've been single so long I have picnics to help my heart. Not Be broken like for example. I have a theory of everything you know so for example. Stop saying their name. If somebody really hurt you deeply, stop seeing their name when you think their name. Try to stop thinking their name. Because when you depersonalize it, it doesn't hurt so much. Don't try to make them love you. I had a boyfriend I dated for four years I just knew he was gonna WanNa. Marry me I. Just knew it. But he didn't. And I had to realize I can't be mad at him because he didn't want to marry me. There are people I don't. WanNa marry. I get it. So I said look. I gave you four years of my life. You don't WanNa marry me fine. I'm GONNA to teach you how to do something new I'm going to teach you how to become a platonic friend. And I moved on because you have to realize that you have you have to take care of you. That's all you have. And you have to think outside of the box that they give us. They give us a box of to survive. You need a job. What happens when your job goes away? Your job ends. You get fired. Your job closes down I mean look at what's happening now. You know that's what we're talk. We're taught. You're supposed to find somebody to love you for the rest of your life, and they're going to be with you and you're going to be married. What happens when that's not the case anymore? You still have you. So those are my three pieces of advice. Hope that was helpful. Marcia. Thank you for that for all the listeners who would love to know how they can reach you whether it's for organizing services or your new mask business. Okay! Well, probably the fastest easiest way to reach me us through by email, and that is Marsha Sims, and then the number one at g mail. That's M. A. R. S., H. A. S. I. M. S., and then the number one and g mail. or Or if if you want to reach me about organizing, if you have any organizing questions, you can reach me at Martius sims same spelled the same way in a R. S. H.. A. S. I. M.. F., at sort it out dot net. If he's have a question you want to ask. Ask Me right away. I'm home like everybody else in the country in the world so. Feel free to call me because I. Do you know I'm I'm home? It's okay my number is area code three, oh five. Four six seven. Eight, five six for an SBA anything I'm happy to talk to you. Thank you marching for being on the show today. Was a pleasure accuser. Thank you for having me. Thank you everyone listening my guest. Today was Marsha since this is your life coach Brown thanking you for tuning into taking an league. If you have any questions or comments, I, can be reached at taking league, dot, com, or nine, five, four, three, six, one, three, six, one seven. See you on the other side of success?