Episode 185: The ZC Patron Saint of Twitter Fights

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

I and Products. Browsing twitter and I come across a from one. William Shatner you might. Him As captain! Kirk, from star, Trek, and he's he posted a just like a picture of what seems to be gender bent Captain Kirk. So like Captain Kirk woman and he's captured. This picture captioned this picture. I do me. And welcome back as euro credits the show where we talk about things, my name is Henry. Helmet God. Together we're Henry. Oh my God Calvin at you to discuss the cultural happenings of the Zeitgeist an obviously by this entra. We have a ton to talk about today. Listen listeners and family. There's a lot happening in the twitter. Verse in the blog is fear on the youtube on. So much happening at a dozen adver staff at it will never stop. That's right. This is spiderman into the twitter verse and we're GonNa be discussing all of the tweets and twits that are happening right now or maybe we'll stray from this topic because I. Don't know what we have prepared today. you know we're just feeling out in a time of great tumult. This is just a it's a safe space for us to relax. Speak our mind. And drink some drinks. That's right. Twitter is a proud sponsor of drinking and tweeting. They always say tweet irresponsibly, because more people will be in the mentions streaking and tweeting also will otherwise known as dreading. Yeah I. There's a reason why they would call at the drudge report. And that predates drea dating, but now the drudge report is about drudge up those drunken tweets from those very famous people well in the past it was it was the drudge report. Because as we all know, the precursor twitter was too much. And when people would get drunk and Trois. DRUDGE. Exactly, that's why they call it that no other reason. And what are you drinking Henry Tonight I'm glad you asked because I'm drinking a breckenridge brewery, vanilla porter and the The bottle cap is informing me that it is the breweries thirtieth anniversary. Really today. Today. Yet it's exactly today on the date of recording is the thirtieth anniversary of Breckenridge brewery congratulations to that colorado-based Brew House. You're vanilla. Porters. Are are really great second only to five one saupiquet reporter, which I can't find in stores anymore and I greatly saddened by Ono yet to move down the porter pillar the porter porter. Porter Totem Pole. That's right. Real heads will know that the took the porter totem pole that the very top the most revealed eagles spirit is the five one to pecan porter underneath it. The the Fox like Deity is the vanilla horder and the bottom of the totem pole. The third place is a I guess. What is it called southern? PECAN southern Pecan. Is Guess other forgotten. Yeah, yeah, it's not really a border, but it's what I could remember. Remember right now for the job. Yeah, it's a pecan beer. I'm drinking. There's a returning guest on the podcast. Oh! Is a a fitness beer. No, I drank of fitness beer, and you know what I think might have given it to high of praise on the podcast. How fit are you now? I asked my ads. I can put walnuts between each one of them and then crush them by crunch. That's pretty cool I love when people start start start sentences by going Oh what my ads. That's how I start most sentences in real life. Do Oh my ads. By halves but I am drinking. As a matter of fact, you might remember the name of alone name of a real ale brewing company out of Blanco tax. US I do remember them because we drink on the podcast right? Yes, we drank. I'M GONNA say two hundred of their Hans pills. That's exactly right. I do remember them. What are you drinking from? There's today from real ale brewing in Blanco Texas I've actually got the fresh kicks. Hazy IPA OH. Hazy ideas are your favorite. They are and I was proud to see that another Texas company was making them. I'm actually decanting this into a glass because I like how hazy IPO look and my glasses a recycle olive jar and it is not big enough. Well. I'm sorry to hear that. Your glass is in big enough, but surely it big enough for those olives. One can only assume whoever eight the olives out of this probably really enjoyed. It, you didn't need the olives out of it. You're drinking out of the glass. Absolutely I as far as the taste of spear? Phenomenal. I'm happy to hear it. It's a it's Kinda sweet fruity citrusy everything you want in a p looking drink. Tea is in like the vegetable or P. as in like the. The human waste product like do. When you? Typically to which we all know refers to a very fancy piece soup, yes. This is delicious. It's it's pretty sweet. So good well. I'm glad you're beers. Good and I'm hoping you can sip it the entire time 'cause we got a lot to discuss this week. John I just went for a somewhat brisk walk. I didn't drink any water after just took a big water size gulp of this. Sounds like you could have really used one of the fitness beers because that's what our whole marketing scheme is. You don't have water. You only have their water down bigger. I really could have used it a because us. Qadam, that was a lot of district. Anyway. Let's stop talking about how much beer I did or didn't drink. It's been a lot moving. So, John Twitter twitter. Twitter's of buzz twitter's. Flutter twitter's cheapen and they're up, people can. Oh. Okay well. Twitter is Chirpin in its tour. Open twitter, right? Understood what I meant by go on. I think I think I mean Oh, I guess. English is not a there's not a great way to. Continue to the next subject of not continue with whatever you were doing. Okay so the skip pats twitter then. Now Continue in the thought, but do not continue to come up with new words to describe. Twitter is doing so no more. Twitter's leaping. Twitter's heaping. Yeah, none of that well all right. I guess we can skip the punchline. Well can you go back to a point before the punchline but us just enough of those things that you were going to say and the trash is piling up high. There's a lot going on the twitter verse, and we're talk about starting with a feud between two unlikely foes that maybe you heard of Oh. WHO'S FIGHTING IN ONE CORNER? We have Hollywood actor Ron Perlman. For playing such people such as hell, boy, and all of the narrators from every fall out game, yes, the narrators from followed hell boy, that one character from season of the witch, the main character in sons of anarchy. I'm pretty sure. He had a role in Pacific rim where he played like a doctor scientist I don't recall that but sure I might be thinking of Charlie Day. You know. I get them confused all the time. I Don't have an explanation. Any other quarter John Opposite for Mr Perlman is Texas Senator Ted Cruz. Bo? Here's the thing. He's not actually in the corner. He's Kinda like in the pocket of the corner where the coach would whisper things to the boxer US like you know dazed and confused because the actual corner is somebody that Ted Cruz. Put their without letting them know that they were GonNa be there. It's Jim Jordan. WHO. Jim. Jordan, who is a doing some research? He looks like to be. A representative from Ohio on the GOP side. and. So, to put us on the time line, apparently Ron Perlman. Was tweeting at somebody named Matt Gaetz, who is a Florida representative? Of some renowned. Ron Perlman said PS. Talking to Matt. For this Guy Matt if it weren't for him, you'd be the ugliest politician walking, and it's a picture of Mr Jim Jordan Ooh. Apropos of nothing. Ted Cruz. Jump said and says. Than Hell boy, you talk a good game. You talk a good game. What you've got Hollywood makeup in stunt men, but I'll bet ten thousand dollars to the nonpolitical charity of your choice that you couldn't last five minutes and the wrestling ring with at Jim. Jordan without getting pinned. You up for it or does your publicists say too risky? What is happening? What, happened was Ron Perlman in an argument with a representative from Florida through representative from Ohio at the Florida Guy and then a representative from Texas said Hey. I challenge you to a fight for ten thousand dollars with this other guy. This is incredible. I don't want to I. Don't want to gloss over the fact that I was slightly. Were this Ron Perlman thing mostly through his feud with Matt Gaetz. Because it one of the most incredible. In in twitter history that I'm a big fan of is. So Matt Gaetz Characterizes Ron Perlman as a racial justice warrior, who had no problem in Hollywood portray the white supremacist leader of a motorcycle gang. Obviously, tyrod has cared sons of anarchy also weird that Matt Gaetz capitalized White Supremacist Ano- are those proper nouns. Don't know. Maybe we should ask a member like him. but permanent responded by saying so true so rewarding playing an asshole on TV, tell me, sir, how is it actually being one? The, good, burn a very good. This is nuts I had. No idea escalated to this point. Oh, it goes so much further. It's amazing. Okay! Oh. I thought there was so that was that was the setup then and I I caught it midstream. Yeah! So apparently, if you do a little digging into Jim, Jordan, you would know why Ted Cruz bringing up. Around him as kind of a bad idea. I. Don't have the exact reason why and I can't. I can't move away from this article. That I'm reading to discuss it. Maybe I can do that accurate, but Ron Perlman responded to Mr Cruise. I tell you what teddy boy since mentioning Jim Jordan and wrestling is problematic. Why don't we say fuck him and just make it you and me? I'll give five fifty K., two black lives matter and you can keep all the. Money you are thinking of spending. Perfectly clear at this point now is. Correct me if I'm wrong is Ted is Ron? Perlman going to fight Ted Cruz Ron Perlman saying. Fuck the other guy that you brought in. I WANNA fight. You and I'll donate five times as much as you were going to donate to your charity to black lives matter. Let's step into the ring. The Texas senator replied I get it your rich, but apparently soft. You sure seem scared to wrestle, Jordan, who you keep insulting can't take the heat need to get a manicure. Weird, really weird, weird, weird reactions, who to being singled out in called out the step into the ring. You double down on. You sure seem scared to fight this other guy that brought into the fight. It's very funny to me because Ted. Cruz is the softest person. Like whenever he's campaigning around. Texas league wears a cowboy hat like these smoothie. Liberals I'm like dude. You're blob fish like. Human. This is a man who did not. Did Not defend his wife after the president insulted her to his face, and he wants to talk about being soft. I don't want to use any coded language that people in the alright tend to use, but he is kind of a psychological a psychological cuckold. Yeah I can see that I also like the use of the word blob because they look very similar. Yeah, no, he's a soft, a little, slimy asshole idiot. so Ron Perlman to this this need to get a manicure line. He responds Teddy Teddy. What kind of mother fucker offers the have another guy probably asleep at the time. Kick another guy's ass. Let's get back to Business Ted Jim Jordan too easy, just a little bitch, but you teddy you talk shit about new. York every chance you get my hometown. It's nursing home the hometown into it. Let's go Mojo. Unbelievable this great, because this is exactly the level of a verbal escalation that leads to a fight in real life, because the the justifications from what's about to happen, get thinner and fitter, also more intrinsic to the person's identity, talking about families and home tout's. It's good. It's so good, and of course it keeps going at the the the article I was reading does not cover the complete thread. But just yesterday tweeted out in response to no one. You know Ted. I've been giving this some thought. Leave Jim Jordan home, and give me ten minutes with you and Mitch McConnell. Let's see what else you motherfuckers can obstruct besides justice all we need the time place in a few emt standing by let me know. And then he added ten crews in added Mitch McConnell. I I. WanNa be clear that we live in very scary times. And there's a lot going on right now, but if I was able to see Ron Perlman, put his fist through Mitch McConnell's face. I'd be pretty happy now back in the day that win. Certain sports for more in Vogue Let's say boxing was one of them. we used to see these events from time to time usually held for charitable reasons, they were called celebrity death matches. They were friendly. Matches between two popular celebrities are to celebrities. People might WANNA see fight. And people would would pay per view in and the proceeds would go to charitable reasons and I'm saying in these. Times full of. Toldt as you said. I believe that's how you phrased it. Don't take my word slur. All I have A. I don't mean to take I'm just I'm spreading my love for your phrasings. And these times full of toll moult. Why not give the people what they want? We have had it where we're up to our necks and civil unrest. Throw a carrot on a stick to us. Just this once. Let us see Ron Perlman. Take on! Ted, Cruz and Mitch McConnell in the squared circle. That might just be wrestling. what are they? Call in the ring and the boxing ring? Let's see, let's see a megabits yuan. One I don't care. I WANNA see Ron Perlman box. These mother fuckers into the dirt. In Rhode Island but put their money where their mouth czar. Ron Perlman has the bone structure of someone who's indestructible. So, it would be very interested to see I think they could even make it a three on one. Oh you you Jim Jordan to be in there. I mean Jim Jordan. He seems like a real piece of Shit, because apparently asked people like cover up Blake. Sexual abuse allegations at Osu. Yeah. I just did the search to find out. What exactly the connection to wrestlers is and apparently six former wrestler say representative Jim. Jordan knew about abusive Osu. Doctor so apparently. Yeah, he might have slept swept some abuse under the rug. For the sake of wrestling, but put like Hannah Rand Paul in there or something I'll. I'll be fun. Would be real fun to watch. It's it's just. It's just true. That the party that is currently leading. The GOP is up of people who are ideologically. Very strong, but physically and presence wise in an imprint, much every way, a very weak and soft. They're basically like the kids who got bullied for wearing bow ties in high school, but the reason they really got bullied is that they call everyone slot? I mean unless you're one of the representatives who came directly from serving in our military. If. You're a career politician I. Doubt You could hold a candle to the physical prowess about a Hollywood actor who has to hold unrealistic beauty standards both male and female I am pretty sure like any. Any actress could also kick. Any politicians asked just because they're. They have to go through such physically demanding regimens to keep up with their their appearance in stuff. Okay, we could make it a three on two, but the Ron Perlman side has a tag team partner at he can tag out with Sir Show Ronin. Notice I think she could hold her own against Ted Cruz. Kill all of them, but really I think at that point it would be like a squash match just hanging out, so they can keep like double teaming their finishers on people right right. Yeah, I I think if you have the integrity in the bone structure of of an invertebrate fish. You can't call like I could see maybe if you if it's if Ted Cruz was tweeting at like I. Don't know I'm GonNa. Throw a name out like a Tom Cruise like a pretty boy, it actor. But this is Ron Perlman? Yet, this is someone who if you just saw him in the street? You would know not to fight him. Yeah, he? He was picked the play boy late. Who is a huge monster? Any. Him makeup like he doesn't see gi. It's body. Up for the arm I'm guessing and there was what was it beauty and the beast that show from the eighties where they picked on Prom and just because he is the person who looks the most like A. Monster, the fact that Ted. Cruz like Oh you're not so tough about your Hollywood. Make up like oh you mean the red body that they would put on me like Ron. Perlman doesn't get touched up to look better. He just looks like that. Ron Perlman would and will kill. Ted Cruz I hope here's. Something that we're seeing right now is in these really difficult times. People's levels are rising. They're getting more like spicy. And I hope we've reached the appropriate level of spice where I get to see Ron Perlman choke the life out of Ted Cruz. And you know. What was it? The Romans did the bread and circuses and tough times they they put a lot of money into giving people, food and entertainment. I'm not saying that the. Five hundred million dollars or billion dollars, the absurd amount of money that just went out into the economy with no transparency at all. I'm not saying a little bit of that shouldn't go to fixing this match between Ron. Perlman Ted. Cruz, give the people something to give them hope. I'm just heavily implying that. Maybe some of that weird elicit blood money that disappeared into the ether of CEO's pockets should have gone to ward setting up a match between Ron. Perlman Ted Cruz. Mitch, McConnell, insurance or Ronin. To give the people some hope. I'm GONNA be listen. I will make a genuine plea to the powers that be that listen to this podcast. I know that they do. Oh, yeah I, mean yeah. The the NSA agents assigned to both of us should in and pass this up to your superiors. You actually miss read that we're actually the only communication channel that's being monitored by NASA. Off the NSA all right, so the buff nerds at NASA, because I know you all work out in like some space chamber to get twice as strong as regular buff. nerds have very time chamber. Lift this message up. You Know Bench press this message out to your superiors so that I don't know. Elon Musk can set this up. But my genuine plead to NASA and all of those in power is I am very mad. I'm mad as hell. I don't know that I've. That I've ever been this mad about what's going on in the country on pretty much. Every level like I was, I was walking around today and I was having a pretty good day. It was making a smoothie. I just gone for a walk and a seared off into space. I thought idly for a second, and I said the words to myself I cannot fathom how evil this country is. Oh No, IT'S INSANE! I'm very mad, but I if you if you gave me a two thousand dollar a month stimulus check and you sacrificed Ted Cruz Mitch. McConnell and Rand Paul to Ron Perlman insertion. Ronin I might feel a little less mad. I would give anything to see any of these politicians who feed garbage line after garbage line about how? Things are supposed to be I would. I would give anything just to see them have to physically do something. Because, all they do is talk. About. How great they are! How great their decisions are out great. The grand old party is or out grade. The Democratic Party all they do is run their mouths and I WANNA see them run into the fist of Ron Perlman and door sir. Sha Ronin. Nothing in our system is great. We hopefully have all realized by now, but at least in the past are lunatic. Politicians would sometimes clash and kill each other on a sand bar. Sometimes, where'd where'd that go? I feel like when Thomas Jefferson stole a lot of the the constitution from the sulphur contract by the French philosopher whose name I can't remember right now. Russo Yeah risotto. What's his first name Shahada kind of Jacques? Cousteau You're thinking of. A famous detective? The payments Sharp Jeanrenaud. When Rene Discard? No. It's John Jock Rousseau. John Jack Russo when he first came up the social contract I really wish he had included a clause that said any representative from the government has to fight any representative who challenges them of the populace for everything you know like a One v one for all of the marvels like you gotta defend the government that be. or You gotta like move aside and let the people set up the government. They want I. Mean That's essentially what the social contract is. But I wanted to determine by one. We one fight boxing. You know not not with guns or swords or anything I want I want. I want judgment by the Gods in the rain between Ted Cruz and Ron Perlman. Give me this. Please just give me this. It's all it's. It's all I want Ya. People talk about like. If time travel invented what they do and they all I'd go kill Hitler I'd go sink the titanic, a purpose I would go back and just add. I would have to learn French I. But I would add just a paragraph to the social contract by John Jock, so that says Ron Perlman. beat the Faulk at a Ted. Cruz every polices. I. If if this is a pick, your fighter scenario might. I know my fighter going forward after the Ron. Perlman inaugural `bout If they want to send anyone after a sunken at a choose Kevin Lee that you have see fighter who knocked out that white supremacist, and that made it instagram captured that, said Bernie, Sanders, you bastards, he's. He's he's my pick. All right. I got you after Ron Perlman. Who will be of course dubbed King of the Dome and Sir Sharon tag team champions of the Dome. On the lurk looking for more fire between this this this feud between Perelman and crews and Mitch McConnell I decided to in Ron Perlman Ted Cruz, and the twitter, and here's a tweet. I found. Ted. Cruz, a forty nine year. Old Man is hiding behind Jim. Jordan a fifty six year, old man to avoid an ass, whooping from Ron Perlman, a seventy year, old man and Ted thinks that makes ron look weak ted. You haven't looked this week since trump called your wife ugly, and you kissed his ass as thanks, and that comes to us from at MED. Oh, I might just spell it. Any B. R. A. N. N.. A. N. Med Ranan. Okay, that's accurate. I just want to give credit since those were not my own words. But yeah, that's the situation that we're looking at two. Younger men. Against one seventy year, old man. There's no logic. Any more in the world. Logic is dead. Yeah pretty much I. I would agree with that. I it's just it's sad. It's sad when when when? We find ourselves looking into the face of insanity and all we can do is reporting on it. WHAT THE FUCK! Yeah you'd think people would have thought better of any of this at this point and I know there's a I mean. There's obviously a lot huger things going on, but I feel like this tweet. Exchange it capturing like facet of it. Where like you said people are. They're getting fed up. With the system and the system isn't doing anything to alleviate that, and this is happening a multiple fronts. This is happening on the black lives matter front and the police reform front, which are one and the same. It's also happening on the covid front, and now it's just happening across twitter at large. I really think that we're in a situation I. I really think that we're in. A psychological ideological pressure cooker I feel like pressures are continuously rising as a result of the global pandemic, because now people are are stuck inside all the time. Number of distractions are lower so were just faced. Every single day with the the naked fact of how evil and corrupt, the system we live in is, and that's making some people doubled down on defending that system, so they're becoming much more odious or are racist or fascist, and some people are doubling down on their hatred of that system and are getting more and more. Actively, like violently anti-fascist, which to be clear I support. Yeah, absolutely, Fascism never be supported at I Think, maybe from joking perspective that at times like this Ted. Cruz is facing all those backlash. He instant like immediately grabbed his phone in tweets out to the guy who made quickly like you're stupid. APP isn't doing its job. Your Apple Listen, we gave. We. Gave you all Epstein Money, so you'd make an absolute people would forget. What we are, we gave you the Epstein Money, so people would watch. People would watch the short TV shows instead of holding US accountable Wehbe. or like he hops on email and just quickly shoots WB message. What do you mean tenant was delayed again ten? It's the only thing that's GonNa going to distract people from how inept we are. You get you. Get Chris Nolan the bone. Did you see? Did you see how long game of thrones last and how? What we're just watching game of thrones, rather than caring about everything bad. That was happening in the country. We slept. We slipped in, but now it's over and people don't even talk about it anymore. We are going to have three sequels, so people wouldn't have to think about Shitty shitty country is for what are we have westworld? Only nerds watch westworld quimby. The I have several thoughts like. The twisted world that we live in where. DND The show runners for game of thrones, tank, the reputation and their career by making the finale suck. For the sole purpose of getting people to pay attention to wake up, it hurts nothing. Real Christopher Nolan move. Here telling me the twist and this this awful story that we're living in as they're actually the fucking heroes how a they're not the heroes we wanted here. It's. Because everyone kept, ask themselves in the game of thrones finale. Like why would anyone make this? It doesn't even make sense in and what they did. Is there actually genius show runners on storytellers because they made a final season that was bad, but also one that you could never talk about. Yeah, no like. The show was dead overnight and I guess a budget. People woke up the next day and say wait a second. Trump is president now? Where did that happen? I mean. In some Kinda shitty ways I feel like in the real world that is kind of flood a lot of people did they stop caring about the one thing they cared about on the L. and then of injuries endgame came out after that people care less about marvel movies, but you know who the secret hero is. Ron Perlman, but who? The the secret hero j.j Abrams. Be. Making. Oh, no, he made he. made the I made the only star wars movie that you didn't remember after you left the theater, and no one talked about he had the world in the palm of his hand, and then he let it go, so people could be one with the world again. He gave us the best resolution to star wars ever which is star wars on its deathbed slowly, let go of our hands, and we let star wars go, and now we have to live where the rebellion. In the popular NICKELODEON show Avatar. The last air bender. This might be mild spoilers for a show that is more than ten years old. There is a society of master benders in skilled people. Called the White Lotus. And they get together to ensure that balance. Is preserved a matter who the powers that be actually are. And so what you're proposing proposing, John. Is that very famous directors and show runners. Got Together and colluded so that all of their long go ongoing cultural movements that enthralled people so strongly either ended fizzled out into nothing all around the same time, a- perfect a perfect storm of having capturing an audience, and letting them out into the world with no more thoughts in their head, so they could finally see the world that they're living in clearly for the first time in decades. And the weird thing about this is, it makes perfect. God Damn said. And it all happened with. I mean give me another reason why all of the media. The last three years has been for the most part either a goodbye or a total disappointment. Yeah, no, only only endgame ended like well, and even then people still had some problems with the mechanics that goddess fair, but you're right game of thrones, one of the hugest cultural forces that we had seen in some time, probably since mash or friends fizzled out into nothing, overnight and star wars this big this big like the end of all nine seasons seasons. The end of the the Skywalker Saga like now the marketing putting like this epic. Saga and it was a total shit. Show a total nothing burger to quote to APP to co-op some language, eight. Miller makes a lot of sense that now. We come out of our Plato's cave blinking and shielding her eyes from the light and seen everything, not just the shadows on the wall, but seeing everything and this bright. Daylight and what realizing that Jesus, Christ? We need to care about Goddamn politics. Now makes so much sense and I hated. Thing ever all of these constructed realities because. They weren't immune. They were influenced by money that came out of the the weird governmental political vall, but now we're free. Pop, culture will never matter again and right win were supposed to have been ramping up all of these collective world's again. I say all of the like you know like marvel. Navy the game of thrones, Prequel that that was the blood and fire. Whatever the hell it was called. Right when like all of this buzz was about to start getting generated again and I think this this is less conspiracy and more to sort of like the hands or the whimsical. Cosmic fate cove, it happened, and none of the none of it could get started again. Like we for the first time, and at least the waking blinking hours of my life culture came to a complete stop, and so we had no choice but to pay attention. I think what I'm trying to say is J. J. Abrams, using his money from lost funded a Chinese laboratory in Wuhan to create of virus. I mean he's j.j Abrams. It's the ultimate twist. It's his biggest puzzle box. You've thought snow was something Oh. I think we cracked it. Yeah, I think we cracked it. The only thing I can't explain they're the people who think five G. caused everything. Oh their Let me see right. Okay, they're the. They're the real heads they know. Yet though there's this there's this common if you WanNa if you think. If you think that five G. is turning you trans or whatever? There's a way to beat it. They actually discovered a vaccine for five G. Five. It's Ernie Trans. Oh do tell. Maybe, our listeners could benefit. Yeah, if I one of the people who thinks that five G. is giving the corona virus and turning you trans. The vaccine is actually free for everyone. You just have to smoke five hundred cigarettes on our holy shit now. This is parody. Parody. Ever people get on public media, so they talk about doing using something as a vaccine. It's a parody. It's A. Don't take me seriously. Bear us. It's fair use creative Commons. It's transformative. We're transforming facts into entertainment. Yeah, we're transforming people who believe that five G. is evil into corpses. Look look. We're both just plain character Yet nothing we say or have sad or will say is serious because this is all a play. We just want to move our branded vitamin supplements. Honor Talk Show listen, we get heated sometimes, but what we're saying is not true because we are characters, we the people who have the exact same name and largely political beliefs as the so-called characters. We're real, but we do not make an appearance on radio or television shows exactly, and that's why you shouldn't take our kids away your honor. Don't take our kids away. We need our kids to sell supplements. How will people see Vir I'll? My son Shale is if they don't if he's not in my custody and I can give him my muscle enhancing mushroom supplements. no-one who watches our show believes were real. No one has ever they've sent us emails asking US questions, but they're all in on it and they're asking the characters questions. They don't think the answers to those questions are real. We might be too deep into our weird contextualized huber here. I think we might be talking too much about a friend of the city. Yes friend of the city. Alex Jones Pride of the Peaches Alex Jones. He can't get saying that will drink. Annul spit up my drink. Bless them. May he be an angel forever? Oh Man. So! I don't know how to put an end cap. All of that that we just said. Let Ron Perlman fight Ted crew. Please let Ron Perlman fight. Ted, Cruz also entered a feud, stayed there for a second did I. Tell people who thought five G. was able to smoke five hundred cigarettes in an hour. It's okay we covered it under fair use. Okay, good just as long as we're covered. Yeah, we're covered. Don't worry. Wrong. Sorry I, just had a five G. attack. Oh, no, I hope I hope you don't have the the five G. sickness now. I do have the five G. sickness. I have all of its symptoms gangrene. Gas I can't do this. I can't fucking do this anymore. I'm sorry I'm sorry I am sorry. I'm sorry I can't I? Can't I can't do this? Let's move on to. Other things showy, yes. John have. You ever wanted to own a robot, never really actually pretty much. Constantly I've a I might be one of those you know you have your typical kid archetypes. You have your dino kids. While it was a dino kid, you have your space. Kids I was actually pretty hard core space kid, but yet your robot kids I was definitely a robot kid. Okay so. Your your perfect show than was absolutely transformers beast awards that have no idea. Beast wars was my shit. God I am definitely familiar with beast wars. I even had like the toys and stuff. It was great, but the thing that always gets me about beast wars is that the good guys were all like animals and the bad guys were all dinosaurs coolest ones? Mega Tron was t-rex and like the show rudders. To One. optimus prime the gorilla to win. No, no, no, no, no, no I was one hundred percent on the side of the dinosaurs the entire time. Only now where I am in my life, can I realize that you're equally cooler cooler than t rexes, guerillas are really really cool, but. No cares about gorillas. Absolutely. Yeah, you know as an adult. I can appreciate the strength of a silverback gorilla, but as a child. If you told me gorilla vs Velociraptor, our T., rex, it's GonNa be the dinosaur I'm sorry. Why did they make the bad guys? Dinosaur? I will never understand I. I also have to make it clear that there were two things perfectly intersected with my three interests number one of course beast wars. Number two kind of the O. G. POWER RANGERS THEY AT L bots that were dinosaurs. To space to talk to Zora on those were my two things, the real letdown for power rangers for me. Is that the they have the MEKA's Lloyd's right like an they would always place. They were called swords. Had swords right -sorts yeah the MEKA's mcevoy. -sorts. They had these individual giant dinosaur robots correct. And every episode they would show them coming out of their the places where they were stored which we're, the swords were stored. Whatever country's government wasn't doing their job? I feel like he could see it from space. And so the purpose of the individual zords was to get to the battlefield as a dinosaur. And shortly after just become the MEKA's award. That always messed me up. Because I like the dinosaur robot better than the combined robot I wasn't it was always a clear Arca, the swords. I call it a three phase story telling structure I guess for the three phases the four phases I guess if any power Rangers, episode is the teens are made aware of an issue. Right. And then the teens show up to the issue typically since they were fighting parties or whatever. Was filmed in Japan, they do a transformation sequence before so they can go to the Japanese footage, so the structure begins, they fight puppies or on the ground. Yeah, they summon Zords. Exactly step two is the. Fight or show up in general, or they summon them to get to the thing if the monsters already big yet. Okay keep you. Also. It's worth noting at one point when he steps one and two a reader, Repulsa or Zad depending on where you are would write the monster, big or make my monster grow as repulsive would say yet. They would fight potty. Slash the monster of the week. Who is humanoid sized and that's episodes were always with the monster of the week had like a thing like he was pollution, man or hypnotism man, where like interact with people at bone, skull, bone and Scott Bulk and skull. I'm everything wrong today, and then they would. Show up phase to the Zorn's never really did they find? This is this is my problem. I think they kinda fought sometimes, but it was not worth. The varkey was fighting. I totally understand where you're coming from. And then of course phase three is. They realized that the -sorts can't do it a shocker. The swords can never do it and they. They have to form into a mega sword. And See I. Get I get the mega zone. I get the symbiotic Titan. I. Get the Voltron I. get the appeal. Of multiple robots, fusing into a more powerful robot powered by team were I did it. My problem is that I. Like the Individual Dinosaur robots more than I liked the MEKA's award. So did you have the powering ranger toys as a kid? I had a lot of beast war toys. I WanNa, say maybe. No I didn't really ever have any of the toys. The power interest toys so I was obsessed with the Zorba Toys. Because you get the little individual things, but then they would transform can you could combine them into the thing? Yeah I'll. Obviously, that's the whole gimmick and it ruled. It was my favorite thing in the world. The little stores were way more fun to play within the mega swords rate, because they had more points of rotation, the mega swords, typically sometimes they would have legs that would move up and down. Typically not usually the arms would just go to three sixty could turn the head. Usually, there was like chess stuff, but the little -sorts were always the most fun part. Yeah, because that you could do more with them because they could move. Whereas maybe maybe the Meka's urban have a cannon with like A. A projectile that you push a button on the arm shoot Oh. If you were lucky, dude! If you're lucky. Wow, now that man I remember the show Gun Mega Sword. It's head was a crane. The pink ranger was a crane. I remember the move. No, yeah I remember the movie where they had the power up their swords or get new swords, because the dinosaurs were were were gone, and so they got these Ninjas. zords NAP. Were all like there's there's the frog the crane like they were animals. And the the worst thing about the show got mega toy was the pink ranger was just a crane? Who is like Anna the size of? A quarter very small. That's handball. The head went on by. You would put it on, and then extend the wings, and they go into these thin ridges so that if you've played with the Shogun Mega to which the head would just fall off, what can bullshit design as that that that sounds really awful that sounds? Really terrible nothing beats the original. Mega Zoro anyway what we're talking about Oh, also you can't. You can't talk about your beast wars, and your your zords very confused with. Zoidze by the way if you know always I, that's where I. I was voids. Person 'cause. That was also a good cross section of robots in animals in people in them. And you also can't get confused with your big bed beatable works. Net that never saw it. Never saw big bad be lorgues never saw that in Samurai pizza cats never saw I was a big fan of both we should really move on Okay street sharks. Also big features any ensemble show where I think it was all born in my love of teenage mutant Ninja Turtles, so any ensemble like color-coded team, the gut together to solve our problem I was onboard for also typically, there was a little bit of like. Weird Nineties Oriental Ism, and most of the whatever yeah I mean if we observe it from a lens of the cultural of aware that we have, there's probably some very problematic issues I just WanNa say I liked when the Green Ranger became the the the white ranger and had the DRAGONZORD. Sword. It was so cool. The dragonzord shows up because the Green Ranger's like he's not evil, but he's like Kinda neutral. Yeah, course is guy is Tommy. And eventually he becomes the White Ranger and he gets that lions Zord thing and it's a whole different transformation, because that's his Gandalf, the grey to Gandalf transformation of he goes through his trial, and now he's totally good at on everyone's side, and in fact, he is the most powerful member of the team. I. It's Amazing Hannity, a Japanese RPG trucks introduced tube through power rangers but I just want to say. He was cool because his sword could do stuff. Like. It would eventually become part of the neck absorbed, and they would power up even more, but like his dragons order lions, or would actually fight on its own I and be cool. Unlike the triceratops in the PTERODACTYL, we just instantly become the arms like. Of the DRAGONZORD, ruled. That we're rockets, and it's chest opened up. There was a laser thing. Third. I have a lot of power Rangers Memories, but if you had the the Mac, the Zord, the original one, and then you bought the dragonzord. The dragons or opened up and rested on top of the mega the built it, so they both worked. It was crazy. They were some real thought. Put into these children's toys of the past. I don't know what children's Toys R. Like now because I, not a child. But I have to assume that the toys of the past might be better. Yeah I used to be a big toy guy until I was like twenty, two an ano. Toys of the past always seem better because you had them when you could truly enjoy them. Ever, since ever since college, where at the move every year, I really am not as big on the physical thing. Kind of thing you know. I mean sitting at my childhood home right now. There are multiple generations worth of power ranger toys. And I might get them and keep them in like storage unit I. Know, I've always everything's giving fight. My mom to not throw my My huge collection of Nintendo power's because like I. Want Them I want to keep them because that's what I did. As a child I. Read About Video Games. Yeah, it's a if only the things we had weren't so bull. Yeah, so I'll repeat my question. Have you ever wanted to own a robot? Oh yes. We'll cool. Because now you can Boston Dynamics will now sell any business. Its own spot robot for seventy four thousand dollars, seventy, four five hundred dollars, weighed seventy four thousand five hundred dollars. Is this the weird one? That sounds like bees and you can't kick over. The four legged robot spot that I I'm guessing that sounds like these. It's other colored yellow and black south. When it walks. Have you ever seen the big dog video I've seen them kick it. Yeah, that's the one. Yeah, yeah! It's a hefty price tag equal to the base price for a luxury Tesla Model S, but Boston Dynamics says for that money. You're getting the most advanced mobile robot in the world able to go pretty much everywhere, a Human Gan, as long as there are. No ladders involved us, so does that mean I can have it Kerry me to work much like my Tesla. You have a tesla. I. Don't know much which I don't know how much you can carry I. Don't know if they've ever said that I think it's supposed to be autonomous and not like a like a vehicle. So the shame is of the robots. The Boston Dynamics has I would always wanted the Cheetah. Is the Cheeto with the one that can run fast. It is a robot that can run thirty miles an hour and jump. My favorite my favorite of Boston Dynamics robot is it's a? It's a small one that can like. Jump up buildings. Have you seen that one? I have not. It's like small, but all I can do like what they've programmed to do. Is scale like? Stories of a building at a time in a single leap and I'm not entirely sure what the practical uses, but I like that one. The only thing that I would want the spot robot for is for my post apocalypse. SPEC script where someone walks around the post apocalypse, but their dog companion I legend like is the Boston Dynamics spot robots. It could be a real companion to Ya. Also allied I don't want Cheetah I want atlas, which is their humanoid one that can carry boxes and walk upstairs Oh. No I I think I've seen. Yeah I've seen that one. That's the one that I feel like empathy for because. It's five. Pete, all I guess I also feel empathy towards dogs, but I guess my dog robots. Now it's it's worth noting in the future twenty years from now. When an atlas and a Cheetah are forcing us all. Point to sit in a movie theater with our is held open with the with metal devices to hold her eyelids open. They will show us on Lou videos of US kicking the spot at the Ad Cheetah and the we will understand why the future has gone this way. In the future when the robot rebellion uprising happens, I just picture them like knocking us and like Ha. It's hard for you. Stay Upright isn't. Like. Killing people, their dislike getting them in lines pushing them and say stay upright. Stay up! Yeah because we never killed robots for fun. They just make us hold empty boxes that have like twenty five pounds worth of free weights in them as we walk upstairs while they throw objects at US deceitful, follow over. Yet not yet they put us through all of the same like practices and and learning algorithms that they went through, and they're like. Why can't you learn oh? Are you inferior like they measured fury already by by by us, not being able to fill the same rudimentary tasks that they can jump up this building. Come on. Is this is this a good premise for a short story? I feel like Margaret Atwood would have a field day with this post robot revolution. It's the stories of humans have been selectively bred to do certain tasks to improve other to impress other robots like this selectively breed people who are really good at walking up stairs to be look we. The robots have developed a human. That's really walking upstairs. Let's. Here at robot dynamics. We have one thing that we want to do. And that's improved. Humans for specialized tasks. Take our stare. Just a person like huge cavs and leg. Whatever is whatever muscles are could climbing stairs? In, like a really white light, you know nothing body, and it's just like it's body is like flailing. Every step it takes, but it can climb the stairs well. If if you're not merely writing this down to pitches Netflix's pilot, you are missing out. This is the next season of black mayor that that guy who says season six were living right now is to afraid to right. Yeah. I like to call him a coward. He's a coward. Because the future is here, it's Boston dynamics, robots uprising, taking over and making humans do the same task that they were supposed to do. Agreed. Movies robots. Death I liked the idea of a I like it rebels. But it only has the level of intelligence that we could program like it's not self learning so that it's rebellion is really really dumb. Yet, because there is that Fairly famous example for if UNAI, I had a predictable model live reality and told to collect paperclips. Obviously, the first thing that would do is kill all humans because it would impede its ability to get paper clips. told it to get bigger clips, but it didn't have a predictable model of reality. That all it does is all it does go to staples a hundred times a day and buy one box paperclips. The spells out like fuck you with the paper Clinton. This system robot rebellion. It's using the paper clip. The communicate its message and. Do, you remember. There was a movie in the early two thousands cult stealthy remember. Wait now I do is this this? Is this the one about the stealth? Gets like since yes, there is a it's an incredible premise because they put the world's most advanced ai into a stealth bomber, right? I feel like it's done by the same team that did like the core in sunshine. It is not unlikely, but you would imagine that the premise of that is they put a an extremely advanced stealth bomber, and then the a I starts to get smarter. Exactly yeah wrong. The. Works as intended, but then it gets hit by lightning. So. It's a freak accident that makes it goes yes. It is I, believe perfectly normal and operate, but then they said what's the inciting incident? That would make an I N. smarter which is gets hit by lightning. And my favorite line of everything in stealth is. They say this is strange. The the is downloaded songs. Now because this is in the height of like Napster and The birth of like downloads. which songs dramatic pause all of them? So, they're not, they're not. They're not worried about the getting access to the Internet in the collection of human knowledge present. They're they're worried that. All of I tunes has been down. There it's so good I. I would recommend that anyone watch those two movies from the early two thousands to one word title movies. I recommend everyone number one is stealth. By the way stealth apparently is directed by Rob Co, director, the first, fast and furious. Amazing and the second one is torque. Never heard of that one. Out Torque is fast and furious for Crotch, rocket motorcycle, racing people fight in motorcycles, they use motorcycle martial arts. Please see torch. Because I've hiccup up some are. Oh No, that's fine. those are the two things. Why is there a featured technologies list on the wikipedia entry for stealth? do you see John, it was a groundbreaking fell one. It beats. You're the entirety of the capability of napster. It's crazy because they say feature technologies. That's just a list quantum computer, artificial neural network, artificial intelligent in the category of airplane technologies pulse detonation engine scrammed jet fee toll aero. Aero elastic control surfaces EDU CAV the Sukhoi. S You thirty seven? The bowling FAA eighteen e F Super Hornet. What are you talking about? Who wrote this? One of the weird side effects of the freedom of Information Act John, and this is one hundred percent correct one hundred percent. A real thing is that certain branches of the military have been working very closely with Hollywood for years. To Fund projects that feature certain things for I don't know the reasons, because that's not in the documents that slight conveniently redacted, but certain branches of the military after working for Hollywood. Hollywood to make movies sometimes and I wouldn't be surprised if stealth. was funded entirely by a research and development team was like we have a kid technology on the map. And so all of the technology in the wikipedia article is actually coming from like a afraid of Information Act to document details. This is what we want you to fill in stealth. The might be by Rob Reiner. Rob Cohen. Wrong wrong rob. I cannot I also cannot stress. I cannot stress. HOW INCREDIBLE THE SOUNDTRACK TO STEALTH IS! Do you know who wrote? And recorded the original soundtrack. Two Stealth I'm gonNA throw the name. And that name is vanilla ice. It is the vanilla ice of the early two thousands. It is by a little rock band called incubus awake incubus. How quaint! so the soundtrack of stealth just to give you a teaser will give anything away. It is a series of original incubus songs and dance to the music by sly in the family stone. Eileen when you have access to all of the music in human history what comes to mind first, but sly and the family stone. I The ninety were. Mistake. Please if you see any movie that came out in two thousand five. Make it stealth. Yeah, if you if you have time this summer to watch one movie that came out in two thousand five. Make it stealth. Starring Josh Lucas Jessica Biel Jay Fox. Sam Sheppard Oh. Joe Morton! and Richard Roxburgh knowing. Anyway I've talked enough about stealth. While I feel like we got a lot of that random question I had in the fact. That Boston Dynamics is now known. There's spot I I feel like there's nowhere else for that conversation ago. That's. Yet. We talked about these words. We talked to help power rangers. We talked about still these are all of the places I thought we were going to go from the question. John. Have you ever wanted to own a rope on it. I'll be honest with you. Until I heard that question, I had not been as excited about power rangers or the two thousand and five movie stealth in the maybe fifteen years while. I Okay I have a beast worse thing. Want to cover this real quick 'cause I. Don't a lot of the toys right and I would catch the show when I could what toys I owned? Was A crawfish. Oh Yeah I had that one too yeah, yeah, McKee at little daggers that came out of his claws. Who was that? It was like CRAWDADS C clamp. Maybe. C clamp, but Lab. I don't know, but you remember there being like a crawfish beast wars transformers correct. Absolutely I owned it I'm GonNa, link you to a picture of it. was He ever all the show? I don't. Believe that he was yet. It was called C clamp was. Was this, some weird regional targeted margining I mean I grew up in Louisiana so across for me makes a lot of sense for there to be. Like an animal version of that as a robot and I assume you any I know you're not from Mississippi, but did you. You grew up in Mississippi right. Yeah, I grew up in Mississippi, but I I was born in New England, so I actually got See Klama Nazi clamp. He got some seek clam chowder. Yeah, it was, it was actually a co Hog clam with this. Old. Yeah, I know. C clamp when I see him. But I had seen clam, which was a co Hog clan with intense internalized racism ono. Holy Shit US found in like Spurs goddamned try. man, he was never shell, right. I. Really don't believe that he was because. This is the beast wars, transformers, Wicca, and it does not mention. Any of him. Being his beast mode is does not mention him being in the show, the funny thing is It mentions him being a lobster, but because he was, he was Brown. I always pictured him Beena crawfish. Yet does not appear as though. Is that I own? C, clamp, though so I know where you're coming from. I also own clamp. He was one of my favorites. Okay. So I'm happy that we both shared seek clamped at. Shared experience. Some unfortunate news for you all know what happened. After the time warp wavefront was detected entering cyber, trone and space. General C clamp sent agent ravaged track the wave back to its scores, giving him the secretly developed trains cruiser, a meeting of the trip Redac- as council was then called the discussed the fact that transport wave had been matched with the energy signature of the dark side. That is the. Only appearance of C clamp the cartoon. Okay, so that would explain why I would always try to catch these tours. I didn't have a concept of light shows commodity specific times because I was I was a kid. I was as a kid. I was really dumb as a dumb kid. So I the episodes I was always catch would never have c clamp in it. It's ours I just thought. Maybe it was like some weird regional targeted marketing. Yeah Yeah. Louisiana would enjoy a crawfish beast, wars transformer, but apparently C clamp. Can combined with Ram Horn and sees dot com. To form tripper DACAS. Interesting I I. Don't think I ever owned any of those. Now me the only one I owed like c clamp, but I think I had the optimus prime and the. The Mega Tron yet! I had optimus prime as a guerrilla. Like a shiny guerrilla. And then C clamp, who was my favorite battle? Everything else I owned. Because he had those cool dagger that came out of the ends of his claws. Like you would, you would flip them up. I thought they were daggers. projectiles, goanywhere, but No absolutely C. clamps. I also had boom the baboo. You're you're at a minor league, my friend? I don't know beast wars rule, though let's ELSOM. I. Am happy that we both are aware of no of it. It's. There's two stances I wanNA. Make official for Zero Credits Canyon, number one. Beast wars existed was good number two. It's It's always fuck Donald Trump. Should Count me a little of guard. So the two axioms of zero credits, the two zero credits axioms are number one. These wars existed in was cool. On number two. It's always fuck Donald Trump. Yeah, it's always fuck. Donald Trump, those are the two nothing about this podcast has been real so far, but those two things are real. Yeah Yeah, those are the actual to first entries into zero Credits Canyon. Did God damn it. About I genuinely said Kanaan Canon. It's. Hanan now is canyon. The. Funny thing is I picked up on that and I was thinking of it. Ended my head was like. Don't say Canyon because Johnson, Canyon and data made the Canyon. It is it. Is Canyon Canyon. And Zero it's canyon there, but two things these wars and fuck at Real Donald Trump. Yeah, that's it. And I think that's the moral of the story of this episode. That has that is mounted winded. Wayne did waxed and owned. All stages of the Moon Yep. My favorite stage of the moon is the wounded moon. My favorite one is the of the Jesus. Oh Yeah. Yeah, the GYP. GIBBERISH waxing. No I I'm aware yeah, it's the one where the if you look at it. You turn into a giant. APE Monster a tale. I guess monkey monster in that case, and your power levels increase billion fold. Yeah. It's a canon. Canyon, it's Canyon. Yeah. They always fought and cannons yeah yeah. All right did actually the these are typically fighting like weird canyons. Everyone fights in canyons. There's a so let's destructible landscape there. Gene we have to get away from the city. We don't want to kill the surveillance. Let's go to the national park full of. Could, let's go to Zion National Park. We're too close to Las Vegas. Let's go to Zion National Park. It's the only safe place incredible all right. This episode has been a trip and we have taken you through the current twitter, happening and also beast wars, and that's really what we wanted to take you. When we set off on this journey, so I think now is about the time where John says the episode should end. That's right. Henry the episode should end. And so me Henry, I'm GonNa, take you through. The social media plugs this week because this John's turned to edit right. That's right. Yup I love how we always do this in front of the fans. It's. It's the bet it's like when your parents discuss money in front of you. It's the best the best and if you WANNA send us the best. Here's how you can do so you can send us a tweet. On twitter. At Z. C. P., C. W. H. J.. And John knows what that stands for. But stands for. Power. That's right John. Unison her own memories of who the best beast wars robot was when we all know, it was c clamp I think you're gonNA need a little more than two hundred and eighty characters while to send us an email at email at zero credits dot net. That might have been a bit confusing email to close to together, so the address is email at zero credits dot net setbacks. A message about how C. clamps is the best thing ever happened to a world. We're also on FACEBOOK, but who cares! We're on spotify and you can find us by searching zero credit open. Read the C S Close privacy on spotify under the podcast section and you can find us. I tried to get us under Google music, but it seems like they're not reading our feet correctly, and so they only have like four episodes, so my my my whole attitude toward Google podcast is that it's US l.. Were also on Apple PODCASTS, which is super cool because they aggregated are feed super correctly without any input from me, so go to apple podcast. Find zero credits lever of you on a star rating. That's GONNA help us climb the charts. That's going to help us climb the billboards. Let's take down DOJ cat. Somehow even though it's not her John Mara, I feel like we're more of like a weird electro pop kind of like an idiot. Maybe some hard house I'm not entirely sure where our wheelhouse lies, but that's for another time for now I want you to do you the FAM-. You are dear, dear fam-. Send a message to a friend. Check it on them. It's been a while. We've been social isolating the lot. Send a message. Reach out. See how they're doing. And then casually while you're reconnecting with your good friend. Slip in that you've been listening to zero credits podcast, and and let's say how much it's helped you during these crazy times because we have fun, Interactive Information and jokes about beast wars. They're going to be on that. Hook like a C clamp. Like a weird magnetic hook of a weird robotic Fisher that would catch a C clamp. That's what we want you to do. Because word of mouth is the only way we can survive. And, I would like to register a quick correction to Henry I. Know that you said that we are not in Doges, cats category of spotify, but I do want to let you know. The Wu Tang clan did say that GAM ING is one of the elements of hip hop, and you know that we both have these beautiful beautiful gams made for climbing stairs for a robot masters, so we are technically in pop, and for everyone here at the zero credits socially distant, please God's staying your homes. Jesus Christ stay in your homes. This is serious studios. We would like to wish you a happy week. Goodbye Goodbye. And Fuck Governor Rabbit. Third Canyon item. uh-huh!

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