Monday Morning Podcast 8-3-20
Hey what's going on its bill burr and it's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday August third. Two Thousand and twenty what's going on? Now. How are. You. Feel in mellow men. You know something I got to fuck into song in my head. Anytime. I watched the Houston Rockets and I see James Harden. Every time I see him all I think is me and Mrs Jones. We gotTA. Thing. Go and all. That dude looks just like Billy Paul. And I know it's wrong. Every time I see. I mean I, know much hoop it. All thinking. Jo. Jody Mrs Jones. What is that song about? Is it about the obvious? His the dude fucking around. You know having an affair or As someone suggested on the Internet he's talking about getting high. was though shed is like two meetings. Mrs Jones. Jones. We're going to meet the same time you know. Tomorrow. Even, though we know it's wrong, right? Anyway. I gotta be honest I actually really been enjoying the NBA Games with the virtual crowd. You know. I think it's all right. The NBA was like notorious for constantly cutting to famous people sitting on the side of the fucking. In the crowd let cook gives a fuck. You know holy shed. It's it's the guy from the Phantom. Phantom of the opera look at him, he doesn't like that call. A bunch of hockey but somehow I ended up missing I, missed all of it and the Bruins lost to the fly. And some sent me a fucking email from philly because what else would they be doing other than celebrating a fucking hockey win in August. fucking Douche even brought up the eagles. It's just like, why would you do that to a patriots fan? We won six. You know I don't understand bringing. Bringing up the fucking eagles because you one the last one we beat you that you went one in one with us. You fucking QB puked in the fuck and huddle on the final day of Dr. Great you finally WanNa. fucking. Super Bowl. You first title and sixty years. All right I mean I guess if you WanNa Talk Shit about it. I actually literally have to remember that loss. That's how many fucking fucking titles we want. IMPO, this is a big thing. Well, how long will before the Patriots won another? What's going to happen I? Will the Patriots won another super bowl or the fucking flyers And they have a fifty year drought. All right. So was that was that like the playoff game? Bruins, flyers, overreaction B.'s endanger earning low seed from round robin. Yup who added I've? Immediately go to the playoffs here. Round Robin Flyers beat Bruins NHL. Round. Robin. Game. Okay. Flyers stay hot. They stayed hot. Okay. We'll state hot from what this was like the first game back talking about the exhibition. Away their last few wins at. All that much you're not Philadelphia. Remain on a roll the flyers beat the Bruins four to one in the first NHL returned to play round robin game on. Sunday. Heading into the pandemic pause the flyers saw game winning streak and against the Bruins. Being that the flyers one on Sunday and also their exhibition. Against the penguins, this team has been on quite an upper trend Jesus because I mean, that's a bit of a stretch when you say. If you fucked one eight games, four months ago it hit a four month layoff diabetes guys just keep rolling along the last two days they didn't play. All right. I guess that's where the Talkin Shit I have. No fucking idea. I don't even know what's going I. Mean You really going to count this. You're going to count this as a fucking Stanley Cup win. If you win, this is when the Redskins won that super bowl the early eighties. When like some of their winds would like. SCAB players and shit. I don't I do know this is if there is a way to fuck it up. And give somebody an unfair advantage. The NHL will figure out how to do it. So I have no idea how the whole round robin thing wins only knows we're one game back. In the flyers, the Bruins and evidently there on one hell of a one game role. Well Good luck to you in the flyers Sir I don't give a shit. I actually liked the flyers. Dove. I can actually remember. When the Bruins, one of them when their last cup you know but said fucking Song Joe. Barney. Things. Have you ever seen the Flyers Win The cup? Evie ever seen the flyers win the Cup you have. You must be crying 'cause you know you close to die in. Have you ever seen the flyers win the Cup I mean Jesus Christ. Talking, Shit you. It's time you one Gerald Ford was it office? The Big University of Michigan Staff. So there you go congratulations to them. The Celtics lost, we lost to the Milwaukee Bucks or looking great. There are a number one seed in the east. And we're wearing these uniforms fuck. It does. It said cream city on it a cream colored jersey. And it said cream city I'm like what the fuck is cream city Milwaukee's one of my favorite cities. I. been they're resilient times. I, love it more and more every single time and I love when people say, where would you live I said Milwaukee there was looking to be like I'm fucking around, which is my great the secret still not out. All right Milwaukee Cream city. I. Looked at up. And it has to do with the fact that Laverne Shirley. Got So. Much Dick during that. Cut Kick Cream city. It's because of the the brick. I guess that cream colored brick. Cream city is a cream or light yellow colored brick made from clay found around. Milwaukee Wisconsin in the The men no. menominee river valley. It's so weird how we went in there and just. Committed genocide. Americans just completely wipe them out and then just in the named Shit after all of them. On? The Western Bank of Lake Michigan. These bricks. One of the most common building materials used in Milwaukee during the mid and late nineteenth century giving the city the nickname cream city. Bricks. The name cream city bricks. Characteristics, cream city bricks are made from a red clay containing elevated amounts of lime in sulphur. This clay is common in regions of Wisconsin especially near Milwaukee when the bricks fired, they become creamy yellow color. You know something Dean del. Rey keeps showing me this shit he goes on instagram. Following a this cheap houses. Account. In. So many of them are like in the mid. West. And I will tell you something right now there is nothing more scary than a super old home in the Midwest. Every single one of them looks like fucking Ed Geene is going to be coming down the GODDAMN stairs. They're absolutely terrifying. Those. Old Houses with the fucking would in all because they're always empty. You know in the middle of and no one you like Jesus, Christ. How many crimes against humanity of happened in the fucking house? I saw one. In the middle of Kansas is a school for sale an entire fucking public school. You know big fuck and bric brick ask. Building. Enough to hold all those baby boomer kids way back in the day in all the land they want twenty-five grandfathered. South Texas. Some buddies of mine that make movies I'm like you fucking by this thing. You'll have a location for the rest of your career. This fucking school could be a God damn office building it could be not house it could be a school. A precinct address it up anything you wanted to be in just fucking become the Tyler Perry of the middle of fucking nowhere in Kansas. None of them bit on it. You know I can only imagine the fucking problems that are in there, but you got to see the picture this. They still have the old fuck and desks in there when I say old fuck fucking old like little house on the prairie old maybe that that far back. But like desk kids probably used to dive under when they would take like. They would do those practice. The Russians are coming to bomb. US. Anyway, so milwaukee known as cream city because of the cream city brick who the, fuck? No. Anyway. So I was last night. My wife was watching this this frigate show about a serial killer. And I WANNA. Watch this right before I go to bed. She's like, no I. Just want to say it's like really interesting. Came in the middle of it was about the Golden State. Warrior. The Golden State Killer. That guy you know where you just fucking raped and killed all these fucking women and then that shit that came along. You know we you send your DNA into the Internet one of the dudes relatives sent it in. And it was a close enough match that was part of the family and the kind of narrowed it down to this guy they waited for him to have like a FRESCA or some shit and they took the can out of the. Out of the GABBAGE. and. WanNa percent match and they fucking caught this guy. Right. So I'm watching this documentary, I gotTa tell you something. There's something wrong. With one of the people in that family I just don't buy anything that say. It seems like that just say in what they're supposed to be saying and I got halfway through that and I'm like, wait a minute. Can and a serial killer? Is that if you got like music and your family, if you have a serial killer in our sudden, you know it skips a generation but then somebody just sits down and can play the fucking piano. You know. Does that happen with like let me see. Let me look that up. Not The fucking stupid thing and my goddamn search engine. Is. Being a serial killer. Genetic. Dumb one who asked this question to all Siri Coz have a genetic predisposed now I mean, is it hereditary? That's what I mean. No no one was dumb enough to ask this guy. To spell it. Her H E r read. RFID. Or. Read. Heredity hereditary. Oh, what is the? Is it be Oh my God. No the just the refuses. Can you Jane's make you kill and they don't mean tight jeans jeans G with G. All right. That's fucking hilarious. I gotta wait for fucking Goddamn Ford Pickup Ed. Warning, this product is not safe to alternative cigarettes was a pickup truck. All right. The killer read his Bible he drank heavily it was the fall night of two, thousand, six so-and-so walked out of his world trailer in southeastern Tennessee carrying his twenty two caliber hunting rifle is a strange wife and his friend and I pulled up. Job of the world shut eight times killing her he used a knife. Cut Her head open. You then chase his wife with the knife and a machete. What in the fuck? Mary told his frightened sheldon come tell your Mama Goodbye. Because his last time they'd ever see him or actresses his wife Manage to slip his grasp at escape. Is this a movie three years later, a county court. Dude have to the whole thing he said he'd snapped. I'm not proud of none of it. He told. He convicted of felony murder. He faced the death penalty to save his life as legal team took an unusual approach never before. They said he had a generic varying on his x chromosome the one that code. All right. Well okay. So you get a chromosome you gotta go. Job Is, free, turn crucial. Jesus fucking Christ I looked up a fucking recipe. I don't even care anymore. Ongoing complaint or anytime you like, Hey, what's it? Good Pot roast recipe you gotta go through fucking three pages of you know growing up pot rose was always one of the. Bills that just brought our family together. This smell of its searing in the kitchen, my mother would always me. And that's how we found out. She was fucking fat guy down the street that she called her her little pot roast. anyways, you're going to need to. fucking sprigs of time you gotta read like a whole Goddamn. Soliloquy is at the fucking word. The whole damn thing they're. Just to get to it. I think you look up how how do you pour cornflakes on milk? Cereal is really a dividing issue in the breakfast world I mean personally, I love it. But there's other people that just cannot handle milk because they're lactose intolerant. Obviously, this really affects cereal lobby. I remember when I was a kid my parents wouldn't buy me tricks. So me and my little sister decided to try to make our own chicks. fucking scroll down ten pages. Take your favorite cereal poured into a bowl ad milk. Anyway, I watched a lot of frigging TV. I didn't see the F one race I knew there was an f one race, but I also knew that Lewis Hamilton was going to win and he did. Now he's like fucking thirty points ahead. I did watch the last lap with that High Pitch Guy was just screaming. Having. Any Stan when He wins every fucking race. He already has like fucking thirty forty point lead. I mean, he's just too Goddamn good the guy won the race on like three tires fucking stroke race. Shits only supposed to happen the God damn. In in in the movies I, actually Kinda Stop Watching F one because I was starting to have this irrational hatred of Lewis Hamilton simply because he was so fucking good. It was winning. He was so good. He was making it boring. Then I'm like, why am I? Why am I bothered by this guy dominating like this? It's like. Well, you know because I turned on to see a race I wanna see racing I want to see passing. I WANNA see excitement. I don't receive. Lewis Hamilton is the first one out of the I tear that we all know that the race is already over even though the seventy laps left. I will tell you a great documentary. You GotTa Watch. You GotTa Watch the Robert Foster documentary. Legendary. Record producer Lou just has like this gift. Where he can you know here a make a hit and all of that. But I'm GonNa tell you something that. You Watch. This documentary. This dude is the closest thing to like if like Ron Burgundy was was a real person. I mean the guy's fucking ego is like. I don't even know where to begin the stories that he told about himself. None of them had a left turn every one of them was I. had to do this and I didn't have enough time. And I fuck crushed it. He's like when I was a kid, my mother played in the piano immediately said that's an e and she was like what and I was like that's an e. And she was like, Oh, my God he has perfect pitch. He was telling these stories about himself. Then he told this weird story I like fucking. He had like four or five sisters and his mother. Every morning would feed them like soggy fucking cornflakes and make him bacon and eggs with toast every morning you're like Oh. There it is. The little prince, all the other ones were like scrubbing the floor toothbrushes and then no point was he sort of? fucked up shoes. They're playing favorites like that. The best part is all the people around him. who had just sitting there talking about how fucking amazing he? You know none of them questioning the guy's ego this fucking poor woman I don't know what he had on her but she's just like you know it's about time he did Broadway. She's literally pointing to a fake watching her wrist. He's going like fucking I don't know I can't even get it was like And then Barbra streisand told me she wanted an album that was all synthesizes no drums no base no French horn bassoon. And I gotTa tell you. I killed it. Take This guy goes like he's the greatest keyboard player I've ever heard. An I've played with Herbie. He's talking Herbie Hancock right and then they cut the David Foster and he's working with Chicago. And he literally takes the horn section out of Chicago Deeb. All's the fucking band. He's better than Herbie. Hancock and then you watch him Piazza Tara Singh and one of the songs I am a man who will fight fool year round. Like. That's better than bow about pets the fuck Outta here. We coakley with Miles Davis. fucking guys right in I will always love you. anyways check it out. If you get Chits, check it out I mean it is amazing what the guys done but Jesus Christ what a fucking Egos that guy And then. fucking kids come on and evidently this guy was like one of the worst fathers ever as far as just like kids a even his kids were sticking up for him maybe it's true. Yeah I was bored and then he left like six seven months later but you know he's still a great dad he did the best he could. It's really bizarre. All you need to do is just see the picture that that is promoting the documentary. It's him with like seventy two Oscars. I mean, sorry what did what he calls fucking? One's Grammy's. He's just sitting there next to him like. I'm this fucking good. I got a great idea for Promo everybody. How about I just sit here with all my trophies. But evidently, he wants an Oscar because he wants to be an IGA. That's another thing. He lists his trophies. And goes and I still fill my trophy cases a little light hall I mean it's just like, Gee why don't you just tell people that is time for the gun show Anyway. I think the only reason why Chicago didn't get more shit for the songs that they did in the eighties was because Phil Collins was doing all that other stuff Phil Collins for some reason became like the BG's there's always one band that just a fucking pouting. You know I don't know who is this decade or last decade I. Remember two decades ago it was like nickelback. And the decade before that who took the pounding. One of those rap metal pants probably. I get no idea. There's always somebody I don't know solar sudden everybody was buying their albums than out of nowhere they just get a ton of Shit. So in the eighties, it was like, Phil Collins Maybe Milli Vanilli. The seventy s why can't can't say that Saint in the ninety s? It's the decade after when people then look back. Going like came in. It bans fucking lame. It's like, Oh, the one that we all listen to. Now, we're all trying to walk away from the style man. Sorry I have no idea what the talking about here. It's twenty two minutes in maybe it's maybe it's time. To do a little bit of fucking reads here people I'm actually, I'm trying to put together A. A. fucking. Stand up tour here. At some point I also have to go out and I got to earn some fucking money you know. Got A house to pay for I'm trying to figure out how I can do it. Like the show has to down where nobody at the show. Gets Gets Kovic obviously. So that's the part that we're working on Oh. It's easy to protect the person on stage. You know, but it's the people in the crowd they're. Like how do you work if you get one of these stubborn fucking people that refuses to wear fucking mask? or the ones that walk around wearing a mask and have it underneath their knows what he do with that person. I don't know but the mass shameless get crazy. I saw this one this video on instagram with these two what sounded like young people were just yelling at this fucking look the woman the layer retired which old white lady with white hair and shit just yelling and it's like we fucking leave her alone she's somebody's grand. Parent you know what I mean. She hasn't she's GonNa fucking die from it and they just hounding her screaming at us and she comes over and she fucking coughs on them, which is inevitable. It's like how much shit can you give you waitress before you know she's going to spit in your fucking t? You gotta go easy the fucking sitting there yelling at them. Then when somebody cops call the police, that's it call the police and then they both got fucking charged with being doses. They put them in the same Goddamn self. Anyway. What else I'm sorry I'm GonNa fucked up mood because I saw yet another thing happened to a comedian where it's just like. It's accusations and then people just like sign off on it before the person can even defend themselves now I, mean, you're just sitting there going like. Were you there. Aren't you like me like I have no idea if this is true. If this happened I don't know if it didn't happen. I. Just know there's some people saying something happened. And then my favorite, my favorite fucking thing. Is the bitter ask comic. You know what? I mean who uses That situation as an excuse to air their personal feelings about that comedians act I mean how fuck low can you go? Jesus Christ the fuck it somebody's land in the side of the fuck and row for all you know could be innocent and you take the time to be like you know it. It's always like you know thank you can't believe this fucking guide Blah Blah Blah Blah, the shit they just been accused about, and then there's some sort of criticism about the act. I thought is big as crime was that he was called the comedian just like wow. Wow. What kind of fucking person you? Kind of fucking person. Are you that you take a fucking that? US. You know people are trying to suggest that a sexual assault happened here. And you're going to use that platform. So you can get out your fucking bitterness about where you're fucking career is unbelievable. fucking believable. So. This person actually made a video. And in the video. You know the part that I love is the fucking sitting there saying how the people around him were advising him to not say anything just let the news cycle pass. It's just like. I understand why the accused person can't defend themselves. It's it's fucking nuts and I don't get how all of these people are signing off like yeah this makes sense. This seems like the right solution. For this so I'm actually You know happy the person ignored it actually made a video and hopefully people will start doing again in due process. Will Return. And hopefully, this time due process will actually work for victims if they were actually victims. I mean, isn't that the logical way you should be looking at this rather than just being like somebody said something happened. All right that's it. That means it happened. Hey I'd like to defend myself now you shut the fuck up. All I need to hear is an accusation. I don't need any fucking evidence whatsoever. Blows my fucking my I understand regular fucking people. They're board right now they're in the middle of fucking pandemic. So yeah. Throw someone of the lines for my fucking entertainment but to see fellow comedians jumping on this shit. You WanNa be like Oh so evidently you were there You know or did some I don't know what fuck it evidence. You have the make sure that fact but what it really comes down to then fuck is it always comes down to they then they don't like him as a comedian. Jesus what a complete fucking piece of Shit Person. That you would do that to somebody up not saying whether the person accused is innocent or guilty because I have no fucking idea. That's why you have trial. All right. Let's do a little bit of reads here. Let's do some reads. Let's do some reads. He likes everybody. Alex. All right. Not being able to sleep because of today's politics, your love life and all the other drama. Mentioned shitty sleeping conditions on the road you've had to deal with Oh Jesus Christ. On the road I've had beds I'd been afraid to climb into and I just you just do it. You gotTa make. Your out. He's got to get your DNA on it. You know I'll tell you bad ones when I used to stay in those fucking motels with the doors opened up out into the parking lot every time a car would pull up I'd see the headlights underneath the fuck and Underneath the Goddamn door and you just go on like just one good. fucking kick. In that door is gonNA, come flying open and I am in here without a weapon I'll tell you I understand people buy guns when you fuck stay goddamn motel that opens up into the. The idea. fucking parking, lot. ANYWAYS helixsleep makes personalize mattresses made right here in America. That's good. We make we make mattresses. And ship straight to your door with a free no contracts delivery free returns at one hundred nights sleep trial browse. Choose a mattress heroics looks made a quick quiz that takes just two minutes to complete and matches your body types and sleep reference to the perfect mattress for you. If you like a mattress that released soft or firm ladies. You sleep on your side or your back or your stomach you sleep really hot with Helix. There's a specific mattress for each and everybody's unique tastes I, love Helix but you don't need to take my word for it. Heroics was awarded the number one best overall mattress pick twenty, twenty, they did it again by G. Q. 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Burr be you are to save fifteen percent off sleep better recover faster and trained smarter with whoop today that is amazing that they have that technology where you can really break down. Like I mean like turning yourself into a frigging racecar me as long as they don't share it with anybody. I'm sure they won't. I've been doing this thing with drumming is I've been. The drumline like that is alluded me forever and I really realized that. It's the bottom good times bad times thing that have been talking about forever. It's alluded to me because of my practice. Was Flawed I would try I didn't have the technique and then I would try to go too fast too quickly and then I would get discouraged and I would move onto something else and then I would come back and I would do the exact same thing. That you know led to me not being successful. The previous fifty nine thousand times so. What I've been doing. Is before I play drums, is I stretch like twenty minutes because I'm fucking old. Do a really good long stretch. I get totally relaxed. And then I go in the drum room and I just started playing plays slow is poss- not as possible just like really slow in just slowly warm up. My my hands, my feet legs in the whole thing. And then when I go to do the good times bad times thing I just warm up super fucking slow. Just gradually increase it. and. I don't have any goal. Other than I'm going to practice this lick really slow. And then I'm going to ramp it up to where it's comfortable. And then pushed myself a little bit and that could be a little bit further than what I did. Yesterday or could be a little bit slower. I don't care I'm just GonNa Fuck and do this. So I've been doing that. And when I play, it's like I'm going to be really relaxed. So there's like these two bars that I play when you come out of the solo before he plays that Lick fucking ten times in a row back to back. Towards the end of the song. And what I say to myself in those two bars is I just say as I'm coming up to it. Is I say I just tell myself to relax. And who gives a shit? You know. If I pull it off, just make sure you get that first one and what's been happening is is I'm actually. Staying relaxed, and then when I get that first one and I come into it. Relaxed in and I get that I one off I just sort of lock into it and now all of a sudden. You know the speed is coming. And I've been able to play it. Last night I got the sixteenth note triplet three times in a row at ninety BPM in the song is ninety five Sa-. Closest I've ever gotten I can't play ten times but I did play the ten times in a row lick. At eighty BPM's comfortably in I almost played it at eighty five before it's SORTA crapped out. So now I'm just like great. So then I went back down to like seventy five. And I just sort of played the whole song jumped around the Song ailing the sheet music and just sort of locked at in that that just feels relaxed. In Regular and then I ran back up to eighty, which was ways easier at that point and I just of played that, and then I stopped. And? If just That's been working for me. Because I've I think pretty much everything from parroted to everything I never fully got up to speed because I am really fucking impatient. And I sit down scatter brained and this like fifty fucking things I wanNA learn how to do. So I do all fifty things for like eighteen seconds each. And and nothing really gets better and it all gets fucking. It's all sloppy. Then it sounds like shit. So I've had to figure that out about my brain, and now when I sit down I, have to have my brain like totally clear and I really have to just be a note with just working on this which just working on this and then I apply a bunch of Shit. that. I learned from David Lich. Back in the day when we could actually go get a fucking lesson, you know face to face. Is I've just I just applied all of this stuff as far as like relaxing how I'm sitting. And I don't know I. Think if you go beyond that if you have a good teacher, if you really sit there and figure out how your brain works. And what you're doing to contribute to not being successful. Came in last night. I was like flying. fucking believe I did all his the fastest I ever played that. So. That's that's GONNA. Be My new my new approach. When I'm downstairs, I was getting nervous when I start talking about drums for too fucking long that people can be like. All right but we get it. We don't all fucking play drums alright. STAMPS DOT COM everybody as we slowly adjust to the new normal if this, how it's GonNa be forever, we still need to be smart about how we do business luckily, stamps dot com to make things easier thousands of small business owners have discovered the benefits of stamps dot com in recent months. Yeah. You don't have to go to. 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Just go to stamps dot com click on the mike form at the top of the homepage and type in burpee you are that stamps dot com enter Bir are right. Now. It's time. Now it's time to say that I read all the ones I guess I did. I guess I. Did I got to get into hockey I'm actually site that Philly fan wrote in that should. Get me going here. Guest in own home. All right. Here we go. Hey, Bill I hear you on the wife feeling like you're a guest in your own home I'm an airline pilot and have been home way more than ever which I took as a good thing. But apparently, I'm scrolling up her in the kids routine. I just keep biting my tongue thinking what the routine would be like if someone wasn't working to for all this shit. rant over loved the podcast stand up family thanks and go fuck yourself. Yeah. I mean you got. You need to understand her and she needs to understand you because like I always see like with professional. Sports, athletes, professional athletes. They provide an amazing obviously lifestyle for everybody to be living. But then like they're not home a lot. So what happens is everybody gets into this fuck and groove. That doesn't involve you, and then all of a sudden you come home. And then you do disrupt it so. Yeah. So there's that weird thing that she is right that you are disrupting the routine but a you know it would be nice if she also acknowledged that you're paying the routine. But that's not how it works. I've found that when you when you actually make a good point with the woman that. Means that you just somehow through something in their face rather than you brought up a point to defend your own position. We don't need to throw it in my face. I. Didn't throw anything I just said it. Trying to give you a little bit of perspective it sounds to me like you on some level. Think what I just made was a great point. And you can't really refute it. So now what you're going to do is act like I was. Out By bringing up a great point. To, shine a light on my position is somehow being rude to you my supposed to just sit here and be a fucking punching bag. That is fucking amazing that you're A fucking airline pilots Steve Probably have three hundred people's lives in the palm of your hand for the better part of anywhere from three to six hours, and you have to handle that you have to fly instrument every fucking flight right anything above are my God already forget anything above eighteen thousand feet. I think you automatically fly instrument. But I'm back into flying baby bump. Flying twice a week and I wish I was flying three times a week. Offer -tations are getting really really good. Last time I flew. I was really working on that last part of it where I don't bring the nose up. You know make my RPM's go up and I lose airspeed stay level. And just wait to do that that flare. Once I get that down once they get debt down in the last little part just leveling out in pulling power right before we settled down to the ground. Did a great flight went out to Camarillo airport. The last time and I used this four flight APP that I literally sat down and I watched. This guy give like an hour and seven minute. Instructional thing on and now I get it. And one of my favorite things about the APP is they actually have a three. D.. Picture. Of whatever airports if you're not familiar with the airport, you can actually look and get a three D. visual of what the approach is. GonNa look like. You, combine that with the map of the airport and then you you take an airport that you were totally unfamiliar with. I would never say that I'm familiar now because I hadn't gone to it before or hang onto it in a while but you just so much. You have this picture in your head. You got all the taxiways and everything you know. The runways. fucking layout. and. I actually feel confident now because that's one of the ones that's really busy a lot and I would get anxiety when I come in there because you WanNa talk quickly, you don't WanNa step on anybody and you don't want to have to have the tower repeat anything to you. So, what I would normally do is just transition which I would just asked to fly through their airspace, which is the easiest thing. But. This pastime actually did some bad work at the North Pat. Whatever and. Had A great time although I got a little frustrated stuff when I'm really learning as it's just like drumming. Is that you know I've really been like holding on too tight with the controls. As you want to be like looser. You are the more information you can take in as far as like what the helicopters telling you most importantly, which way the winds coming from. And I started to do that last time because I had a couple. You know I came back who? Just like the first time I sold where I go into the down wind and all of a sudden the fucking low RPM Horn would come on and I. Think. Oh. My God I'm having a fucking engine failure was just because I was gripping the throttle tightly and I was overriding the governor. And I did that a couple of times I really have to think about it but like all my instructors voice you going to be like with your feet on the pedals to have all your weight like on your heels like super light and when you're pushing down either your lefty right foot, the other foot is not even touching. The Barely. Touching I should say. The other paddle and I don't know like you just. WanNa like. Because I don't know what it is like. I don't know the more nervous. You either less comfortable. You are more rusty are just tighter you holding onto that thing and then exactly what you don't want to do. Which is fight? The thing ends up fucking happening in sustain thing it's like playing some drum like that super fucking fast Hezekiah tense up it just all goes to shit so. I don't know like I said, I'm flying a couple times a week I'd like to fly three three would be fucking huge for me as far as. Know because there's always ends up being like a three four day layoff as opposed to like if I flew every other day, how good I could get would be awesome. So But I also have responsibilities here at home so we'll figure it out anyway I'm babbling now babbling on. All right, let's read the next one here. All right aging out. Okay. Sorry guest in own home. A Bill I hear you on the wife on a sorry. One OKAY AGING OUT OF MOTO G P Heli Hey hey there billie burke kes- instead of my cats love your stuff. Yada Yada what makes Rossi's age impressive is okay. So Valentino Rossi is like forty one years old and he's still Competing at. The highest level in motorcycle racing in the world and he gets on the podium still like wants to season or so So I was like well, you know it is the machine all that. What is What is it about his age? Why is it so hard to keep riding at his age? Does your body break down. Taking all those obviously fallen off the bike and shit. So anyways, the person says a the usual stuff that a lot of this is what makes it impressive the usual stuff that a lot of athletes go through. That, build up over the years senses not being as sharp as they used to be i. didn't think of that getting tired of the travel in the media circus but also be since he started writing in the lower classes in nineteen ninety six. Incredible. There have been endless changes to the rules regarding tires, electronics, engine sizes, and tracks coming and going from the calendar. Yeah. That's like a Bella check thing like how you're successful for that long because usually when a couple super bowls all the other coaches breakdown what you're doing and totally steal what it is that works. Indianapolis. Colts. See in Modo GP right now, there's an insane amount of young talent coming through the lower ranks. Fabio that's quash. Aurora was nineteen. When he entered the top class, he won the junior world championship, the class below Moto to emoto. Twice in a row at age thirteen, that'd be fucking cool. The watch can you watch that anyway to see year old kids future stars fucking ripping it up. You want at age thirteen and fourteen Marc Marquez was one of the youngest world champions ever in two thousand, thirteen at the age of twenty. He won the motogp. Thing. It isn't that writing at his age is impressive. The top I love man TT writers are thirty, forty, forty, eight, and fifty one and that shit is crazy. What's impressive is that he's been able to adapt to the changes in bike's tyres riding styles over the years while staying competitive with the younger guys. Cheers. Come to Japan some time and go fuck yourself. I. Love to go to Japan and one of my favorite writers already forget his name because I'm new to the sport is a great Japanese writer in motor GP who had incredible race I think the first one. It's always good to see new blood. Coming up in the ranks yet Japan is definitely definitely on the list. I gotTa make that happen obviously when it's when we go back to the old normal. Anyway. All right. Guys who won't let you split the check Oh eight. There's a great documentary to out there about. The year mark. Sorry Valentino Rossi switched from Honda to I. Think he went to Yama or Suzuki I think it was Yamaha. So. You know he was he was winning and he was just the shit and he was writing for Honda which is like, Lewis Hi. Hamilton who's to Shit and he's driving Mercedes. So there's a lot of critics of f one who are saying. You know Lewis Hamilton wouldn't be as nearly dominant. If he was driving for somebody else because Mercedes is the best and it's also like well, Lewis Hamilton is also the best. So Mercedes wouldn't be winning at the same clip. You know and I think both Mercedes and Lewis Hamilton would obviously agree to that right well, the the dumb asses at Honda. In early this is funny after I gave shadow to Japan. I'm not saying this still dumb asses, but they made a dumb ass move where I guess Valentino. Rossi was getting too much fucking credit they felt and they said, hey, it's not just the writer. It's also the bike they made some they alluded to something that well, he is driving riding a Honda. So that pissed off Valentino Rossi and he switched to yama and everybody thought he was nuts because I guess Yamaha wherever the fuck switched to wasn't. Winning Shit. And not only did he go over there and made immediately made them a winner? He won the championship the very next year, which from what I can tell is unheard of having what little I know watching F. One And watching it as an amazing driver like Daniel Ricardo you know. Switch from red. Bull team to the foxy with now I figured who is with by he was with Renault last year and this year I think he switched again. And You know it's it's like football where if you like one of the worse things to be the top qb prospect in draft because you're going to go to some shit fuck and team with no offensive line and then people have who knows how good you could have been. If you maybe the third ranked guy and you actually went to a competitive team that had an offensive line with an older quarterback and they worked you win you know and you had a good quarterback coach. You didn't have fucking new QB coach every fucking year. Like happens to a lot of people out of here. So that really is interesting anyways. All right. Guys who won't let you split, the check. What's up bill loved the PODCAST. Okay. One thing that I find extremely annoying is the the guys have to pay convention on dates. I'm in college in the guys I date are in college. So I know that neither of us. Having that much money. Neither one of US had that much money to spare. It seems kind of fucked up to me that being in a relationship is like a money saving tool for women and a huge financial burden for men. Yeah. I would say that I think it was that way back in the day because women weren't allowed to work, and then also once you married a guy like he could fuck and Lord over you when you were like his property. So to. Vote to try and balance it out somehow as you had to go out and go by the SAS MORILLAS Anyway some guys are animate adamant about paying for dates I. Always was even when you're sincerely sincerely offering to split parentheses, not some fake Oh, my God. No, you don't have to do that bullshit. All right. This is like the coolest chick ever. She wants to pay. She's owning up to the fact that chicks shit like that. All right, which then this is what I wish happened in politics. So, they wouldn't be screaming and yelling where you could just be like. Hey. You know. Obama fucking drone bombs some wedding. Kind of blew the oil companies. Okay I can definitely give you that be oh, haven't said that you know this guy trump's a little out of line. You. Then, you could actually maybe have a fucking conversation. So a screaming at some Old Lady, because she's not wearing a fucking mask, he's going to be dead. So leave her alone. anyways, which also puts me in a weird spot because it feels like since they bought me bought my meal now I owe them sex yes. Like prostitution but with food as an Intermediate step. All that considered what do you say to a dude to actually convince him to let you pay for yourself? I don't know what you say because that's a weird thing that's got to be a weird thing for women where a guy insists to pay because then you've got to be sitting there going like, all right what do I have on my hands here? Do I have an old school? Who's going to take his coat off and let me step on it as he walks over a mud puddle whatever the fuck that is. Or? Do I have somebody that's GonNa be Shoving Dick in my face because they paid for my fucking steam spinach here. That's a hell of a thing. That's see. This is why I wish more women wrote in on this fucking podcast. We'll bill maybe if he didn't trash him every ten seconds they've they've fucking listen to this ship. Fair enough. Yeah. Because that's interesting that then you're going to be sitting there being like, okay I'll let you pay for this but. That doesn't mean you know. You can take old. And fucking twenty minutes when we're back in your previous. I I would tell you this at this point The way things are now, I would be terrified as a young. Guy Out there as far as just like. All right. I'll tell you this to all the young guys out there. If you even get a hint of vindictiveness or craziness you gotta you gotTa just fucking Walk Away Like Deniro in he, he just got to stand up and just fucking you just fucking walk. You know I don't know women. I don't know you gotta come up with some sort of fucking It's got to be. So there's to be some sort of well, that doesn't really work if the guy's a monster. I is really no solution because human beings male and female are just inherently fucking flood. I will say to women out young women out there that are dating and all that Shit. You know there's plenty of fucking dough JOE's out there. were. You could learn some fucking grappling Jujitsu. That's my thing. I really think every fucking woman on a should learn how to do that Shit. Then they probably abuse that power to but. I'm just saying like you could fuck in. In some way is gonNA sexually assault you they gotta get in close. All. Right. So if you're good at fighting on your back and you can put that person in an arm bar and you, there's no ref to tap out you fucking blow out. Zelba that's it. Nothing kills a hard on like a broken fucking. Or just put him in a triangle. I mean I gotTa tell you I would think. No matter how much a guy outweighed you once you I mean I. I shouldn't say that I should ask Rogan this but like at what level belt. Okay does weight class matter if the other person has no grappling skills whatsoever has no idea like Oh fuck they just did that which means in another half a second I'm going to be in a triangle or an arm bar unless I do this. I just think that would put you like a tremendous tremendous fucking advantage. That's something I really WanNa do With my kids? I. Hope My. Hope that you know these fucking. Thing and soon, and he could just teach kids how to you know defend themselves. against. psychos in life. And then you just teach Mike never abused his power and all that shit which I think is part of the DOJ doges responsibility down there but I would definitely say that gay. Choke. People out. Just fucking walk around choking people out. It's another thing to what if you knew your kid was a psycho d then fucking let them learn how to do. That can't have some Cobra Kai Kit. Jesus fucking quagmire all right father-in-law offers car. Dear Billy's are US congrats on baby number two. Thank you. He is amazing. By the way he is amazing and watching my daughter interact with them. It's just one of the coolest things ever. She's head over heels for it's so awesome. anyways I'm thirty years old and just married the woman of my dreams. Congratulations she loves the outdoors. Draw a drop, dead, ten and his. In residency to become a surgeon to boot. To you fucking hit the lottery I work in the nonprofit sector in in loved it but was unfortunate laid off due to cove it. Sorry to hear that I haven't owned a car for ages because I live in A. P and W city. With great public transportation. What is a Peon W city? What in the fuck is that mean that like I'm supposed to know that P N W. meaning. Says W serial killers. Also Pacific northwest. That's hilarious that I just looked up and W and immediately said, fucking. Syra killers. All right. Pacific. Northwest city with great public transportation. and. Protected bike lanes don't worry I'm a biker stops at stop signs and I don't wear that silly spandex Shit Dude I love a bike lane i. wish they actually had him here in La instead of spray painting bicycles. On the street. There's your bike lane. New York City has some great bike lanes while you're on the other side of parked cars. fucking. Amazing. Jersey barriers and all of that Shit anyways my new father-in-law reached out and has offered his two thousand two lexus with one hundred, thirty, thousand miles on it for just below Kelley. Blue Book, value. It's a good deal but I worry he might hold it over my head. In some strange way. We haven't always gotten along for a few reasons. He's an asshole he talks down to my wife. He believes if you aren't furthering science, you're not were really working. Do I buy it fuck? No. Thanks I hope the family is doing well, no fuck this guy what you're saying about this guy. He's an asshole. He talks down to my wife. Now Fuck this guy. For All you know this this type of guy what you're saying about him is true. There's something wrong with the car. And I had a buddy remember longtime ago way back in the fucking day. A buddy of mine when I was a kid. He bought a BMW. Offer doctor and we were kids man when I say kids, we will still. You. Know Teens early twenty twenty S, and he sold it to my buddy. Driving home, I saw this blue smoke coming out the couple of times out of the back and I'll say our burning a little oil whatever And then all of a sudden like it just started sitting weird in the back. And finally buddy vise knew about cars he put it up on the fucking the lift their. And they saw it had been in a major fuck an accident in the frame it bent in this guy didn't disclose any of that. So the fact that this guy is a scientist. And you know in Defensive Feminine this time if you aren't furthering science as far as working on a cure cove it. I mean, it's probably the most important work right now as far as the world economy goes, but I I would not do that. I wouldn't do it. If you know if you've got money to buy a used car, I would buy something else somewhere else. Yeah. Yeah. That's definitely worried. fucked it. You don't you don't want that guy. Getting in any call you gotta you gotTa, keep a guy like that at at arm's distance I really believe that the cordial you have to respect that that is the father of the woman that you're gonNA marry in all of this or that you married or whatever See always got to be respectful hello goodbye. Let them in. Alright. Worried about college. Okay. Hey Bill I love the. P and I've watched your Conan. Appearances at least a million times. I'll thank you CONAN's best. I'm a seventeen year old girl and I'll be a junior at the University of Florida. All right. Go gators by the end of twenty twenty go gator she writes. I took a ton of advanced less than classes in high school and now three years ahead. What a seventeen year ago I'll be a junior. She's crushing it at first I thought this was great. The faster I start school the faster I finished right I didn't want to waste my entire you slaving over textbooks, my issues that I've been. So focused on academics that I lost out on a lot of the experiences my friends were having in highschool I didn't go to parties prom homecoming football games or even my graduation ceremony I'll stress that this wasn't because of my parents I'm just insanely introverted and none of these things seemed appealing well, I can relate because I didn't go to most of those things either. Now. I'm basically a socially Awkward Weirdo and I'm worried I'll be. Fifty. Before I even have my first kiss everyone says, college is the best time or their life. So how do I put myself out there so that I can make some friends and maybe even find a special fella. That's adorable. Thanks, and I think it's pretty mean that people are always telling you to go fuck yourself. Look at you. You got a good heart you're motivated. I'll tell you this right. Now you're a catch and a half. So any guys going to be lucky to be with you. So I was totally introverted you just have to like. You got to forgive yourself. That beat yourself up that your introverted that you're shy. So just to start putting yourself out there baby steps. You know what about just baby steps you way out there. In gradually you know open up, you know if you don't speak up in class just say all right. I'm going to answer one question today and I'm going to get over that and I mean, that's how I did it. Now I baby stepped my way into being a comedian I started any opportunity I had. To take a public for any any class I knew that stand up and speak in front of the class I would do it. And Once I made that decision. I started to have. You I allowed myself to be not good at it. I allowed myself to be embarrassed get dry mouth, and all of that show stuff. Once I was just like all this stuff's going to happen in all of this stuff is normal because of the way I'm wired, I just need to move the ball in inch in the direction I wanna go every day right? And once I did that. I grew by leaps and bounds as far as like my confidence. So this is something that is. Is a great thing. That you can work on in it's totally fixable and then also. Just, start going to Florida gator games. You know I heard the SEC might have some games this year just go to the Games. Put. It out there that you want to go to the Games but you need a crew go with you fall in with some people and they here's the thing considering you've been introverted and all that I'm a little worried that you're gonNA fall in. With some you know. Not Worried you know what you're going to. Here's the thing. Just go with your gut when it comes with France. All right. If you feel the people you with are cool and they're good people in your clicking with them continue to hang out with them if they're not don't be afraid to fuck and move on. It's no different than being in a relationship boyfriend girlfriend with somebody you know it's just got to listen to you got. So there you go. So congratulations, you'll be fine. All Right Rambo helicopter. Bill with your knowledge and understanding of helicopters pretty limited. What's your take on helicopter scenes in Rambos in the Rambos? Well, I always loved him on. This is what I'll say about not specifically Rambo. I'll just say in general in movies is. When somebody's getting chased and then they run over and just start they start up a helicopter fucking car and then they just drive away That's the fuck and most hilarious thing especially. If. It's like a turbine engine like a jet engine. Like. There's a whole startup procedure that I've. You can check it out look. A star three fifty startup procedure. And there's a thing when you go to start it up where the engine is heating up and. It gets up to a certain temperature. Mike Seven. Hundred degrees and then you have to back it down or something like that roll down the throttle. For a few seconds before rolling it back up or you could actually burned down the fuck and helicopter you could actually have a fire because of what's going on in the background. So whenever I watch one of these movies in somebody gets in even if you fly what I fly. It's there's a whole startup procedure especially if the fucking engine is. Ice Cold. And You gotta let the belts. You gotTA. Let you roll up the power. They got attention though the clutch light has to come out as a whole start up i. mean you can just you can fucking do it. I guess you could just do it. It's not good for the engine or anything else, and I would be nervous about that but I guess. My option was getting eaten by fucking. ZOMBIES. But even then it takes a little bit for to roll up to fuck and speed. That's my only issue about it, and then also whenever they shoot out the fucking tail rotor and then the person just spends and spends and spends and spends and spends. Any helicopter pilot. CEO Brand? New. The second you start spinning as you roll down. To the detail is what they call it. So then it's basically putting it in neutral. So now, what's keeping the main rotor turning is ship falling rather than the Torque of the engine so Whatever you've roll down a neutral. So neither, one of those, the the tail rotor not working now and the main rotor still spinning, you're not dealing with the the engine turning that anymore. So there's no torque wearing to turn the ship and the opposite direction at the main rotors turning Jesus Christ. So. Yeah. You would roll down. And then with your paddles, what you had left from the well, if they show, it shot it out. So then you don't have that maybe you would I don't know. I've never had my tail rotor shot out. So anyway. Just. You know what? I. Talked Long enough that you ended up learning how what little I know about fucking helicopters I know more than the average person but I don't know shit and that is a great way to go in life just no, you don't know shit because then you'll be open to learn new shit by the way. Mrs Jones was written by a guy named was performed I should say by Billy Paul. And I actually went down a rabbit hole. Listen to that guy I learned about some other singers that I had never heard of, like if you Google Billy Paul. He ends up he talks about the singers that he was influenced by and what's really cool is it's really a lot of female singers because he feels that they did more with their voices which I thought was. Really. Interesting and then he brought up this guy. Shit what the Hell is. Let's see here. Nina Simone Johnny Mathis Sale to style silliness. And there's a Guy Jesse Belvin said one of my favorites. These to call him Mr Easy Jesse Belvin. And this guy helped write earth angel. And unfortunately, he did a show in Arkansas he died when he was seven got into a head on collision in a car and back then you know. Those cars were just you know the engine just went right dea fucking chest. Had A head on collision died unfortunately twenty seven super talented kid. he did a mixed race show. Him and another think African American act in these. Old Racist White Dude showed up yelled a bunch of Shit at the stage which you know was the N. Word and a bunch of other ugly shit and then we're kept pleading with the white kids to get up and leave. and. There's a theory that he had his tires slashed and that's what caused the accident and if that's fucking true man what kind of fucking human being. Could do that to somebody. Like and feel no guilt about it. And at the end of their life, you know if you have any sort of belief in any sort of a high power, not think that you're going fucking directly to hell for that one. fucking brutal. So. I don't know I. gotTa Tell You I. Wish I was better at writing scripts because to me. That's like there's a fucking movie and a half they're. Like What happened like? No, no investigation just I don't know how the fuck did. They figure out all these years later or did people know back then that it was possibly tires were slashed generally been something to possibly look up Jesse Belvin J. E. S. S. e.. L. V.. I. And That's the podcast everybody. Thank you so much for listening So great that sports are back. And I'm hearing this news that they're able to test skin test results quicker I think that that's going to be our way out of it just it's going to be testing. And Eventually. The quicker. You can test people in the more inexpensive. It is the quicker you'll be able to figure out who has it who doesn't in your quarantine I think we're going to get out of this stuff. All right and if that. Don't yell at people who don't aren't wearing fucking mass I understand getting them out of stores I get that at this point and I understand why people are yelling because financially, everybody's fucking hurting at this point. But screaming at them is not GonNa it's not GonNa, help him give me I tried to fuck and make fun of and I never got more negative fucking. Shit in my life. I will say the people who don't think you should be wearing a mask to maybe watch some international sports. You'll see that everybody is wearing masks. And You don't think that it's a conspiracy against your guy which I understand why you would think that because he has been under attack the entire fucking time as all presidents have been since Bill, Clinton you just under attack the entire time you trying to run the country, which is not fucking helping us out. Alright. But anyways, that's it. That's the fucking podcast. Thank you for listening. Go Fuck yourselves. I'll check in on. Yeah on Thursday. See You.