Curry McDaniel: Founder and Owner of Curry and Co Events talks about her spiritual awakening after her darkest days and how she jumped from from corporate America to owning her own flower and Event company.
Hi Guys Katie. lowes actress, mom and host of the parenting podcast. Katie's crib. A show that helps women navigate the colossal changes that come with motherhood. You'll hear from resilient. Mama's knowledgeable experts and me asking a whole lot of questions. It's real talk that offers real perspective on what it's really like to be a parent. New episodes published every other Thursday listen to Katie's grip on iheartradio APP, or on Apple podcasts wherever you get your podcasts. So. I have my friend. mcdaniel joining joining joining me joining need. Eight o'clock. And have a glass. I have a glass of wine. Toast! I'm so excited. About how we met and I want you to tell a story. And I also WANNA say curry is one of the kindest people we met, and had such a great day, and I feel like connected instantly like I really enjoyed your perspective and your personality right away and I love what you're doing with your life and I can't wait for you to talk about on this podcast. But you sent me just just as a nice have a great day kind of thing, a- box cookies that were so that were handmade and decorated and. Gosh what a sweetheart you are! That is so kind just Timmy cookies just make my day. For me Always had this idea of every single person that I meet. I WanNa take the best thing about them and I want to take that with me. Let's run through that list of what you've collected. Yeah so. When somebody okay, so the thing about it is! There's so much like social media in there so. I just feel like people are disconnected in the Times are having real authentic friends I can't even tell you how many times I would be out in public, somewhere or marketing from own business or being at a mixer or whatever? and. The first thing I do is typically go to the bar because I'm like. Oh Jesus! I'm around a bunch of nineteen twenty year. Old Girls who are just graduated from college in Hospitality, and they're all six foot gorgeous. Glam Avante though the. All they want to talk about is their hair lashes and I'm like damn. I gotta be drunk to do this. Shit wants them. So when I go to these events. On facebook with these people on instagram prints with these people, but they don't even say hello and I thought that like years you know, and it's just like, and then I find myself when you become popular. Whatever that means. They didn't want to be your friend, and they want to send you a message, and they want to invite you to do things in its dislike now encounter. The same personal was the Hor-. Nothing's changed. When I come across genuine women who have? Nothing but they just bare their souls to me and show me the type of people that they are, and it's no. You would know who had five dollars. You know who have fifty thousand dollars. It's just were all here. And we're showing our true selves, and so when I come across these women that truly make an impact in my life, and they changed something they they make that spark. Come on that light. Come on for me. That needs to be celebrated in. It's not I didn't care if anybody put cookie on instagram or not odd just wanted you to know like. Hey, you did something for me. You touched me in a way. Everything shitty right now with Kobe being home, and being quarantined a just WanNa make you smile just WanNa? Make you feel good because when I spent time with you, you did that for me, and so it was literally eight women. It was My friend Angela profit, WHO's like a celebrity wedding planner at Angela's Angeletti to me. She was my business coach and I wanNA contest with her and we'll talk about that A. A little bit too, and that's kind of what started that. So all these women and people always say, how do you know? Give me the little stink times. How do you know her? Or how do you know her and I'm like well? We just spoke like regular people do even dogs speak, and we just created a friendship and because I always just try to be myself not fake or only or anything like that. We just connect on these different levels, and so for me. I was just like no. Everybody's getting a cookie. Certain women in. It's going to be toilet paper in. It's going to be Fabulous I. mean. I just adore you. Curry to tell me how your business will. You have an amazing. It's luxurious. I don't even know what I'm saying that word correctly luxury. Like. Planning, it's called Curry and Co events and check out your instagram to everyone listening especially Abeer Nashville Ever get back to hosting events again. Everyone needs to call you because you are so detail oriented. You are so aware of who your client is in what they are wanting. I mean I stopped instagram hardcore to. The bottom by. Like you can see the growth so how how basically upset this before people is I kind of wanted to know the story like. How did I get started in? So my friend was a big leap of faith for you. This is not your original career or job. You let original job and career to go full time into party event planning, which I love curry, because people who kind of risk. I'm like. Yes, ma'am. It's scary, and it's amazing comes with a lot of attempt to say fear because. This journey. Okay. This journey has literally been life changing. There's some things going on in my life that she would never know because I constantly will have a smile. I feel like if I got an opportunity to wake up. And do this again. Then you gotta find the good because being in the dark place is really scary. For. ME, yeah So what happened is I've always loved interior design stuff like that I. In College was like accuster coordinator at Marshall's. So at all the wonderful stuff off of Detroit before it even hit the floor for the customers, and so I would just have this fabulous apartment as hot as a team. You know as a someone in college. I just had this really awesome bathroom, and and do as in matchy her and you. You thought I was just fabulous and I'm like no I. Just work at Marshall's and I know what kind of. Of Tastes like so always knew that it was there and I started interning or ELM interior designer in Florida in Tallahassee and I in her during the Governors Need Chin for the holidays, and then we also did private on homes, so it's like the not so pretty stuff like ordering tile, and during the measurements and all that stuff that people don't. It's not glamorous the behind the scenes of interior design the. Big Deal though 'cause you got that internship while you're in college. Is that what you're saying? That is like such a huge opportunity to really like. NBA At the governor's clubhouse like you said Governors House Wonka's mentioned in Tallahassee. I. Mean you're working big events so like in college? You're already. Mom, wow curry look. How did you know that? Literally, it was my son. I also had didn't have legal custody of my nephew, but my sister came to me one day and said. I'm going to nursing school. It's going to take everything that I have I need some you to be responsible for this baby announcing sure so a literally had these two little boys who are years of one year part. I was working at I. was working at Marshall's I was interning I was going to in our worked at Victoria secret so back in the day. Victoria's secret had make remember back when Victoria secret makeup. When you want to come in and get quick makeover, trust them different colors i. was that girl also did? The window displays for Victoria's secret row. been there. Call this stop. And then it's just like I had a second son, and I was like i. need something more stable and started working the state of Florida in one day I got. I got really really I remember this when like when I first discovered rascal flats, and it was like wonderful, because it was like a disproportional journey with them as I was his. I'm just like. Oh, it was just perfect. For me there's different times in my life where I connect more with music of the time or like what music I was listening to when these things happened, so I was working for the state in everybody on Capitol Hill got raises and none of the state workers did. And I was pissed about it and I said to myself as said I'm GonNa go somewhere will ocoee control how much money I make not based on who I know how many degrees are have based on how hard I work and I start putting applications out there national, because my sister's here, brother brother-in-law nephew in Texas, because that's where my mom and my oldest sister is in del called me back. So. I started working dell like everybody in Nashville at some point is worked at Dell sat kind of worked my way. All the way from consumer sales to business sales on business account in kind got burned out in I was like really really burned out so I got laid off, and I had two years to kind of work of severance to live off of to figure out what I wanted to do with my life and I got. got into the medical field and I thought that. Was it for me. 'cause my mom's side. You need to get a job that you will get laid off from it I'm like okay. She's like you need to be a nurse like assist, and I was like no I hate bomb. It I can handle that She's like we should go into real estate and I was like no mom to test in Florida was hard enough from. One Tennessee And I said okay. Let me try medical. Let me do something and did like medical billing and coding. Did durable medical equipment got into the Rehab world and my friend was getting married and she says Curry. My husband's joining the air. Force and get married quick, so I can be on his benefits off and she's like I. Need you to come over and take a look at my centerpiece and I'm like okay cool. How you know have a little bit of an after this and get there and. I said well. What's the Black Siham for I said who died she. Think! It's so I can bring my black and my green, and at that time I didn't even know that like. Plastic Eucalyptus was a thing. You know what I mean. So I was like what odd my sister basically said that I slapped in lipstick on a pig and I. It's like as in a bed. and. Were Business Card than I was like I'm just helping her out so one day I was watching this red. Bull Commercial. And it was Sean White. Doing Skate like snowboarding. It was little Wayne Rapping on stage acedemic is people. Every day do what they love Wacky an eye man I met. I'll like what is. Like just because I had kids doesn't mean that I have no future. Curry decision, kid, you're also single Mama to, and you're saying no way. I am not going to be held back because you can do this Oh. My God. Yeah, I'm inspired by you because the amount of energy that takes to do all these things is so. It was crazy about that time. My husband was in the picture Thomas. He kind of came in, and he says I don't know what we're doing, but I'm going to support you and a Mike Okay. Let's do. Meet a lot of mistakes. I started out in wedding, planning realized pretty quickly that I. Don't like wedding planning at all. No. A sorority girls. that. the bridesmaids and they were meeting to the bride and I was like Oh. Yes, I was like they were mean to the bride, and she was crying. I was crying and I said. This is too much. Herschel. They were being so mean her. Oh. Yes, it was deep and I was like girl Aachen. Handle this. This is too emotional like on one lex pro from losing it myself. I can't help you, baby. You know what I mean looking. On the verge about having a breakdown at any moment, I can't handle it. And I was just like so I then went off in started working with these wonderful women really trying to learn the floor design because I realized. That's what I love the most. In. People think that I love flowers because they're pretty. But honestly the flowers is what helps me with my anxiety Emma depression. Okay talk to me about that. Like what How? Where do you think it stems from your anxiety and depression? In how far help? Your podcast. Listeners are getting a full tonight. Hey, I love it. That's what it's called. Honest women honest talk. It really truly is so the truth of the matter is. Is that I made the decision probably two days ago to get a divorce. It's it's a this year would make eleven years And there's been. No infidelity you know for a while. And I've always tried to look over it in the past it on. And try to work on it and tried to get counseling and try to do all these things so that at the end of the day when I looked at the boys I would say I literally tried everything. You know what I mean. And so. Win The infidelity started about five years ago. I noticed that it caused a lot of stress and anxiety on me. And that's when I started looking into different medications in China figure out because I was having these panic attacks. I was not sleeping like it was just terrible. And that's kind of where it all started. If you want me to be honest. I don't want you to share anything. You don't share their, so don't feel then I'm okay. Okay okay okay. I realize that I'm not. Broken I'm not all shake not. Yeah you to go through all of these sayings. You have all these questions and you're like. You know I'm going to be a single mom again. In this time it's what four boys and not to win an all of these things, so you're getting a lot of raw emotion from me in each started dealing with the anxiety. I knew that certain things would help me. Anu that flowers did not talk back. They were able to me as long as I nurtured them and gave them what they need. And I you know a gave them water and took care of them and fed them I knew that they were going to be okay and every time. I do flowers. I, always tell people like the people who helped me your Matheson's. They always get so annoyed because I play eighties, music and everybody can tell what kind of mood a man based on what kind of music is playing you know and so for me. A lot of music therapy has been wanted the things that have helped me get your life period, and it's not in here. I am. Just to go back a little bit. I'm originally from Miami Florida. And everybody's like Oh fabulous you. No you ever watched that episode of I forty eight on any see where that guy died my house five houses down. and. You should see the look on their face. Sorry, you're getting. It's come on. Keep him quiet for little bit. So my dad worked in did worked for pharmaceutical company called Baxter any also did sales for AOL Williams, which is now primerica financial services in so indistinct or neighborhood in the ghetto. They were wanting to build a community, so they built about fourteen houses to try to help build the neighborhood in my family. was one of the ones that qualified for one of those homes in the neighborhood, and so we went to school thirty minutes away from where we lived all of my friends, growing up were all Cuban Hispanic Dominican when I was little, I spoke fluent. Spanish had no choice none of my friends. They were like all you know like real. Hispanic I'm talking real deal. So. It was a completely different culture kind of growing up in Miami, and so my dad was very influential on what how we were as kids because we were in the middle of the hood, and we were listening to Jimi Hendrix, and we listened to the off the wall album, and I have a love for the cranberries that nobody would ever. My Soul. You Know Avia Yanni all of this stuff that you would never think a girl for your Nad. He was all about this. Young my dad was something special his. On He is his name is Ron Ron Malone. He's a science teacher. department head. He went to two lane, and play basketball, and was the gymnast and Loved Music and He's just he's A. He was a great dad I mean he was a great dad? And it's so weird because it's like. When my parents got divorced, that was not a great transition, but because of their of how they dealt with it. Is Warm, able to deal with my own divorce now the way that I am. What did he sign from them? So they were terrible. Oh, my parents were like. They were just not good. It was like taking this child and taking this child, and then it was like middle of it. Yes. It was like every man for himself, because my oldest siblings were already in college, so it was literally out of sight out of mind for them, but for me, my my brother and I were the youngest. We were still there in Miami. Kind of dealing with that so. There was just a lot of emotion from that in saying all the wrong ways to deal with the divorce. That's such an empathetic feeling person because you felt so much at such a young age. That's a good question. I don't know. I don't know I. There was just this moment There was just this moment. Where I kinda connected with God and everything changed. What was? Working on me I'm not like. I'm I'm not mother Theresa. Will curse you know. Work in progress. You know a number in with that. What was the known like over you in? What was it like? Actually it wasn't long ago. It was right before met you really a all. Oh Yes, I've always had a relationship with Christ but it. But it got deep. Deep recently and Financially. It was a struggle. I was going through some things. I I my. My husband's slept with somebody else. I was stressed out at my job. I was GONNA get. To I don't want you have to air your personnel. Okay? They're going to be okay to air the. Has No opinion. Okay, okay. Okay I just wanted to like that you I. Don't want you all feel like you. Let me tell you. Like. Oh, Gosh I! Talk too much. Twenty twenty is about living in your truth. Yeah, and I made a decision that I was no longer gonNA. LIE TO MYSELF OUT WE'RE GONNA lie to others whatever that means whatever falls in that category. I was going to be honest and raw real about it because I told everybody says something's weird about twenty twenty everything that's going on is gonNA. Come to a head. It's so weird in in it. Did just that indigenous that so here I am this girl in Miami getting all of this creativity from both my mom and my dad, my dad was the musical influence. My mom was the creative person she saying she danced, she painted. She has the green dominant. Tell people all the time like we had the most beautiful roses in the front of our house with the kids kept stealing our growth. And they would sell them on the corner bimonthly. Even have decent flower disabled, you know. But those are my Miami stories, and so the combination between the both of them kind of created the woman that I am today and so I on I learned how to hone in on what I was feeling in identifying who I am because for a long time. I was just a mother. In that was molly role, and it was like no curry. You're not in a lot of women feel that way. It's easy to. Do Yeah we do I mean my oldest is twenty. So twenty seventeen, nine in three, so I've been raising babies two decades. In you know so in. All of this, we all just think that we're supposed to be moms and worship. This is just our only role in I realized that no I can have my own life, and I can have my own company and I can and I've never really taken that company to the next limit, because I've always worked fulltime and had the kids, so I never wanted to take more than two to three wedding, so when people go to my instagram, they're like Oh. My God you have beautiful work. Why don't you have more followers and I'm like girl when you're trying to get? On the damn cable. You don't care follower. You're just trying to take back to get into man. and. Take your dummies your Melatonin, so you can get a full night's rest. Well business owner, you learn these things I understand that there's like analytic snow all this other stuff and I'm trying to get somebody else to help me with that stuff and not much handle. There's so much to handle and let's not forget. You're raising four boys on top of IT I. Mean That's enough in itself. Anonymity Dog, yes. I know it so much, but I said one day I freelance for a lot of floors. When they have big weddings or they need extra hands, they call me and so one day I was doing a wedding on fair. A famous was a football player I think his name is met and Burger. And his fiancee is white now. Her Dad used to be a coach for Tennessee and I was helping my friend Alex with the flower shop and I saw, and I'm like. Upping to centerpiece that was was like right on their table was like one that had done. And I'm and I saw it in publication somewhere and I'm like nobody's ever going to know that that my hands touch that because I'm doing it and doing it under somebody else's company and I and I, don't mind, but I said Curry. If you WANNA, do more girl, you gotta get more weddings in. You got to put yourself out there or and so I said okay. I'm going to cap it at six weddings this year, and and we'll see you know we're God leads me but I've always had a passion for design for just all things beautiful in luxuriance than I, remember being in a car like being in a truck and driving with. Alex who owns the flower shop and I said Alex. if you give me one piece of advice, what will it be? She says Curry. When you find your signature style, sweetheart, the floodgates are gonNA open in house. I was taught us so many different winning different floral designs that I can do a lot of different types. About that because I am not my I. Don't even understand your world at all, but it makes sense the flora world. There's so many different ways to do arrangements and to decorate of space, so all my God you think I think oh I'm GonNa call anybody and they can give me a great floral design know everyone has their own way of doing own Mitch and they. Have you know the Boho when? Were you WANNA scale greenery all over the walls, and even though it's beautiful, it's cannon at my thing. If my style is very classic Romance I want people to look back at their wedding photos ten years from now and say Oh my God. It's still elegant. It's still you know. It's still. Relevant. This is not some trend day. Yes I have one time to get this right. This is not a style. Shoot visit. Prompts. This is an actual wedding, so I take it. Very seriously and I. Get close with my brides in in it starts from a process. It starts from me looking at their pinterest page, and looking at fabrics, and looking at linens, and looking at Polka dots, and looking at all these different elements to Kinda create something magical for them. I mean I look at a piece of crystal and my. Life will come apart I mean there's just something about blush in crystal benches is my life, but I'm just like Oh, so I mean. I. Love what I do I. Tell People. If you're just looking to hire somebody just to throw some stuff together, so you can. Apple floors probably not gonNA. Be Me. I wanted produce something beautiful for people and people. Call me and say I love your stuff I don't. The Guy can afford you any and allowed to have a minimum because you know you have to have a minimum in this industry on because I'm not going all the way to to bill me for just a bouquet. No, it's not happening again. We have a minimum, but I've had people say you know I love your stop and I'll work with and I'll try to get to their budget and do what they want and try to get something gorgeous, because that means more to me for you to come to me and say I love your stuff. I'm not sure I can afford you and so. There's I bless every single one of my bribes. Always. Tell them when they book me. If you see something at your wedding, they you know we didn't talk about. You did not pay for it. That is my gift to you. So! Every single wedding has a little surprised that they don't know about. Until the day. I! Got Married I was lost. I was like what are you go? It was ten years ago that I got married so I'm like so we got married at that little chapel that you see when you go to Aubrey. Little White Chapel on the right side, and then when the hotel and I came, they had a restaurant called the eighteen grill. Now it's called. I Dunno west, end or something crazy like that, but we just got twenty of our closest family members in we. Had A private dinner in the back. And and I. It's. Not Sad about the situation. I'm not sad about the situation My husband is a great person. He's a great dad. He sock, says husband. And that's okay. And at. Don't question God. I know that things are going to be good and Mike. We just had a conversation before jumped on with you and I was saying. I want us to be okay and be there for the kids. They are our priority. We have to put whatever we have aside and I told him. That will never disrespect you. I will never. Busted Jeweler screaming at you or anything because I saw what happened with my parents and I don't want that to happen. An asset, it's unfortunate because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, but God had plans and I said. I love you but I need to love me more. Yeah War. Here we are undoing. Doing weddings got a call from this healthcare company out in Franklin. San, we would love to bring you on. We really need you and we're going to pay you a lot of. We're going to give you a monthly stipend for your car and I was like sold right. Now. We know when it comes to weddings that it's not consistent unless your actual florist, a brick and mortar people can come in and buy things. It's not consistent so I took that job and I was. Some owners that were berry not about the patients, but more about the money. Dan Code. You did. What was it like oh? It was horrible I was at work. I was an admissions director for skilled nursing and rehab slash nursing, home and I started feeling very cold and very weak. And I told him I said I need to go. And I said I don't feel good. And I came home, and this is when Kobe I. Kind of came, so nobody knew nothing else. Saying you can go get tested here, but no nobody knew how to test. Nobody knew where to go. They were sending to health department. Health Department was saying no, we don't we're not. You gotta go to the hospital. Nobody knew anything so I had to get out at home and then. Thomas DOT IT Is that your husband. Yeah, so we were both sick Cortina in this house with the kids. who had you take care of the kids? We had to take care of them with covid. How did you do that? When your mom? You found the strengthen. Yes, so, what did you have to do every day that? I can't even imagine? We took shifts. You know it was like okay. You put abandoned on your mouth. you go out there and warm that macaroni and cheese. You know and you put cereal out, and it was hard because eight and wanted to be under me and I. Tell you to this day I. Don't know how baby didn't catch it. Is. He wants on his Mama. He wanted to be under me. WanNa be under dad, he he just. It was just scary. You know, but we were in the house. We were feeling terrible. And then we are was feeling bad for about eight or nine days the tenth day we start feeling better. levay day started building better the twelfth day we both started having breathing problems no way. And I was on an inhaler. And I was struggling to breathe Thomas. Said if you're breathing, gets any if you if it gets any worse than I'm, GonNa take you to the hospital, so he went to summit hospital. In his test came back negative, but we believe that it was out of one of those negative or two. It was taken too early before they were able to catch it or before the test was able to. Detect it, and this is what it was all brand new, so there was nothing moving seamlessly like there was no. The left hand didn't know what the right hand was doing when. I got my results because I'm in the medical field I. Know who to call what to do. So I had to call the lady who was Over. Over diseases I can't think of. Had Call Her from summit had her office number and I was like. Hey, girl! Hey can have my. Results you know what I mean, and so finally after thirty days, we were cleared I went back to work. And they were like hey, because you were out, the marketer was the marketer and the social worker been covering your office since you gone since he cannot go market and go to the hospitals right now. We're GONNA. Let him stay in that role until the end of the month and you can help social services. Catch up and. Find also happy to be alive. I didn't care what they ask you to do. I was like sure great then three weeks later. They say we're going to keep him in that role. We're GONNA. Take your job away from you. I've been here before. and. They're like in any any. He's not good at what he does. He doesn't know what you did know. He's messing really badly, but guess what we want you to fix it. We, want you to fix it in basically be his assistant and do all this working. Guess what ELSE WE WANNA? Take Twenty seven thousand dollars away from. Then at that point you're like and now I'm going to start my own business. This is the push up needing. At you ask God to give you signs and I couldn't say in how somebody could treat me like that would y'all. When they made that decision, they didn't care about my kids. They didn't care about anything they just knew. that. They wanted to get me out of the door and I don't know why I'd. Pat Costly. That's the first thing that went to my head, but the wave. It was I'm Alan businesses sometimes. It's like it's just so hard core in that in the business world, isn't it? I think because I'm so open and honest. I expect people to tell me the truth to and I had to realize that everybody's not liking curry. They're going to take that. Light them with to the grave. But in that moment, I learned this from. Eliza? Speed Eliza. I learned from her. She's the best. I was angry for twenty minutes. And that's all I allowed it to give me I said. I'm just going to be angry for twenty minutes I'm going to move on and I was frustrated because the lack of communication and how they did me and all of the stuff you know I'm traveling from all the way from Lebanon into to to Frankland. y'All could have called me. Who Would Have Been Nice? You know but it was all a part of the plane and I'm like okay guide understand so when you so all of this stuff was going on All of this stuff was going on felt. it was it was getting dark. is getting dark for automatic with a lot of his environment were driving to work in not feeling anything. The super non doubt. SUPERMOM DIAL! Don't even know how I made it to work. was just kind of gliding with this car on eight forty like donating miles per hour didn't know what was going on in this moment came over me where it was just like maybe I don't need to be here. Maybe. Maybe it wasn't maybe I need to be here. Meaning this job. Maybe I didn't mean to maybe didn't need to be on earth. It was scary. These clouds opened up. And this light shine through. Like at that moment literally not trying to crown here. With you. Listen, but when you think about God's grace and mercy. It is a beautiful thing. Because, there's a lot of people who could not come out of that dark place. You know and they moved to alcohol drugs. A bunch of different things and for me. It was like I had these beautiful cades. You know life is okay. It's shifting and you've got to trust the plan, but you say he and that such a good point curry, sometimes in the shift things fall and break, and it gets messy in like the earth floor rearranges. But then when it all settles down, you have a new earth in. It's like wow, that is so true. Is So scary because it shaking up everything we know, but sometimes what we know is you need to move on from where we are. That chapter's done, and the route of it is to push you out of it. Is Like I need you go in this direction. In during that time I'm literally eight. My feelings away in hours again like forty fifty pounds during this time with an eight one period of this job due to the Strip s and everything else. That was going on and. I, am so happy of where I am right now and everybody's like. How could you be year in the process of? Because y'all don't understand how good God is when you focus on him. And you focus on being a good person and a good mother and an honest business person. Everything else will work at thou- foul. We want God to write it on a sticky note and give a heads up of what he's thinking about doing with our life, but it's not that easy. Don't want God's a mess of the plans. We've already made ourselves. Hi Guys I'm Katie lowes actress, mom and host of the parenting podcast. Katie's crib. A show that helps women navigate the big shifts. Which motherhood can bring this season. You'll hear from resilient Mama's like actress Gabrielle. Union thought leaders like author of the New York Times bestseller untamed. Glenn Doyle and experts like Prenatal and postpartum clinical psychologist Dr Berlin. We get candid about our experiences and. And share resources for everything parenting and Dmitry says surrogacy, divorce and blended families emotionally, preparing for Postpartum Katie's crib is covering it all for dose of comfort and community with those who understand the struggles, and the joys of raising tiny humans subscribed now for brand new episodes every other Thursday. Listen to Katie's crib radio APP or on Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. We thank God when you caused me pain and suffering like. That's not in my plan, so you're doing me wrong, he. Over the five will any religious thing you look at God's always disrupting everything and every. Everything Every, morning begins with pricing hamming reading my devotional. I've done a breathing exercises. That listened to I. Don't sit there and listen to women in not implement what they tell me. How stupid would that be? Have this great energy in these base great. Tricks and things that they're teaching you and you not take advantage of that every for the last five days every night I've been sitting on the floor when the kids get into bed and I've just been meditating in stretchy. Twilight Soundtrack. We are. Your Body. You're letting all of the heaviness of the world. off of you and like your honestly like it's like a shower for your mind. You know you rent a shower and you rinse off the day. It's like if you give yourself a moment to meditate and like just slowly Seek off of you. You can shed that layer. We'd have to wake up holding it so tightly the next morning correct and I up. Here can Slough Spiderman. Here. Oh My. Hi Spiderman. You lost your teeth. And you can shoot out the web's. This meeting. He is by sweet little three year old He is on the autistic scale, so he's nonverbal. So yeah, you gotTA. Throw that little mix into INFLEC-. I'll tell you think on the super. I think I'M A job. I have some sort of super power or something something. I don't go to handle more than most people can handle. Is just because everything on your plate revolt, it requires. A lot of energy and dot and dedication and care in it's like how much space in room does one person have in their mind, body and soul to to give all this? That's needed. You have so many things that are needed of you. Would you do they got? You're doing that meditation at the end of the day. That's. The thing that I discovered care like I'm with everybody in this house. All everybody included a haircut. Took Those little things in, but I'm telling you. It's so beautiful because. Everything is changing like my friend. Who is so amazing? Her name's Katie I haven't told anybody yet about this, but her name's Katie. She owns Ponderosa in time, and she is the most amazing flow of banner in her and are connected in a way that nobody else is connected before so I'm doing an instagram takeover for her for ten days. Wow Own. Katie has one hundred seventeen k followers, or something like that and. Okay. Tell us the handle, so we can follow and watch what you're doing this. Ponderosa in time. In time. Time like the spice he why m. e.? And and Al.. Tag You on that, but she is going to I. Mean Katie knows every floor designer in the US n beyond when you go to one of her floor designing classes, it's not normal. You'RE GONNA. Meet her in. Ireland in some little cabin and your four G., your own greenery like Katie's deep while you. An action. What was Austin action like? after third floor, designing class in Maryland and I spent a couple of days there and met all these amazing blow designers, and she did a class there and afterwards that night everybody go to their rooms. Everything I just sat by the fireplace. Downstairs and fire pit and Katie came as that next to me. And we started talking, and we start talking about our kids and we started talking about It was a spiritual connection with her. She was telling me because I was taking some really strong medication brings ID at that point in so she was giving me some natural remedies and things to do so that I can get off of those type of meds which I did on which was wonderful, but she was just telling me she says listen. It's okay to disconnect. It's okay to tell your husband and your kids. Hey, I'm gonNA. Go take a walk. She said it's okay to just walk down the street in into look at the flowers into look at the plans into breed. She says it's okay to not be okay. and. That's when I was like. Until the moment had happened, did you? We met at that and the day. Across a collective in town. Yup and when I met on attell. was talking like Thomas now we still try to communicate in and try to be good friends in in. It's the most healthy thing to do. It's not Let them get away with anything it's. To girl for that I'M GONNA be forty next year like hell. You know what I mean like. We're okay, just Santa Paperwork when it comes Selassie. But. We were talking and I told him how I was so intimidated. By y'all went up. I got there like Oh. Battle did they called me gender and all? You looked at me. Girl Okay come with me to the bathroom. Hold okay. We were like hey. Call my husband and to make sure I. He's been with the baby, and I'm like Damn. At the end of the D., we're all. We're all human. We're all people were all the same. Elizabeth Calls Me and checks on me all the time like. Dirt leg. We have like our conversations. And and and A message like that is somebody who is really just. She knows about what's going on with me. Privately because I trust her in for some, and I told her the other day like somebody was on her instagram, and she shared it in. They were talking about how amazing she was in our called like. To be stingy I WANNA. Be Your only Black Fred. Sick? Curry. No. Any other girl has short curly hair to what's going on and can't be too. And she was just dying. Manage, but able to like have those stupid conversations with her encounter. Just be myself and she's always so kind, and she's always. She prays for me in in. That's the thing like just don't want relationships with random people. Just because I connect with you guys, I connect with every all a lot of women that I meet. If I know within minutes if they're not good for me. If they're not healthy of on that, I can feel to alive. If they're like really superficial. It's weird because I'll still give him that crazy. Look like Hey, what are you to? Do you know it's just you up in here. Nobody feels this way. Nobody knows, but it was when you stopped. And you prayed with us at the beginning our avenue, well ever since I got pregnant, and had sunny, and I have just had so much anxiety about. Life in life in general, and all the chaos in the world, and all the things that people struggle with than all the heartbreak. All this stuff just like is so heavy, and it's just like bringing. You know bringing children into the world. It's just like Gosh. She just want them to have such a happy life, and there's all the stuff that's going on, and then we get in our own ways. And I was just there. This group of women and we had been having a great conversation with Eliza and like Kathy and I'm a gosh. The whole thing was was amazing Hours like. Get. Level it out right now. It's just trying to get level in like realize that we're all here. And we all needed that in it just when you listen to your inner self, I gave it was on point because we all need that at that moment and I tell people. This parenting stuff does not come with. It doesn't come with the book. It doesn't come with a guide and I don't care what anybody says. I'm not born around tonight. I'm the best modern world, but I'm like damn. It had broken bones. Nobody's been arrested. Nobody's done drugs. You know what I mean. Because where I come from, we're already statistics you know to have. A mean literally images it's all of this has been so life changing for a Lotta people, I, just went to go. See my friends summer and please be seated and Alex has a brand. New Purple Flower shop moved from East Nashville because they had the tornado tore down their house, and they have a new place in Bel me and I told her I said asset allocation. I'll. I'll love you, but I'm not coming up there. I did on. Driving and bail meade. Okay a woman I. Don't feel comfortable bright. Tell me break that down for me. Explain to me your feelings about that. It's. Like. There are a lot of there's a lot of. We already know that there's a lot of white privilege why? These women and these men who think like this feel like they own the world, and if you are in their part of town in, don't no you or they feel like you're not supposed to be there I just I can foresee being a problem even if you're not starting anything, even if you're not doing anything, it can be a problem and you really like this is what the whole awareness that I'm having to the racial racial injustice in the world. Right now is that you have to think like this like I didn't know that this was a thought process that was having to go on. Cigarettes. So you really do. Where you go in certain places because you. Might misinterpret while you're there. That is just crazy curry. In Lebanon. Do you hear me I am in Lebanon girl? Alad listen. Tell you go down the wrong street. There's GonNa be a confederate flag Sahgal air, you know in in but always try to come at people from a place of love. In in an obscene racism in so many different ways I get it. I get it different ways than like my sister would, because my husband is white, blonde hair, blue eyes, so it's like I'm walking around with these babies you know and they're looking at me and they're looking at him and it's soggy. Racism and different types of ways I want to band about our member being pregnant and I was a four months pregnant with Aidan, and I was bleeding profusely and I was so scared that I was gonNA. Lose this baby, and so member Nabil and drive up and I'm like. This is not good and I don't like vanderbilt at all. I hate to say I mean. It's a great place to work, but I do I'm sorry unless I'm losing both legs arm and I got a concussion. That's the only time I want you to drop me off the Bandy. If not semi to centennial, you know because all of my paperwork and stuck with the nurse with the doctors and the midwives were banned. Bill went to that emergency room, and it was crime scene tape at the front and also would have I gotten myself into. So and I met with the doctor, and the doctor said to me. We normally don't get people like you in here. With you mean black women. In. He's says you're so articulate, and you know you obviously have some sort of medical experience because you know what you're talking about, and you're just you guys been a pleasure, I'm like. Yeah, that's exactly Hey Dylan. Can you put on a cartoon on this on my phone for him on Youtube, please? Because he's just listening to Christian music. Pull Baby. Kick, off. He'll on united. Home! Has it been being married to white man? How has that been not not? Ersan but him with people's. Perception of guys as a couple. We have been together for so long that sometimes we don't even notice it. Sometimes That's the way it shouldn't be as the way it should be. in when I met Thomas a just adding care in. People that were Italian updated people that were Hispanic. I'm David Black guys don't? I don't WanNa say that word I don't see race. Because now. That means something different. Yeah? Say it ten years ago when people will get it, what against now under what means now in you're? You're. Not. You're not sensitive. You should see race right, yeah. Yeah because it used to be like I don't see raising that means like I. Love her legally I'm not prejudiced. Nothing like that and now. But now it's saying we actually need to see race because we need to see what the black culture has had to carry the oppression. You off had to live through. We need to see this. We can't just be on neutral. And that's the thing. I'm confused chew. I get so confused because curry in my heart I like I was having a hard time today. 'cause like there's just struggle after struggle after struggle and pain after panicker pain, you see in the news and like there's so much hurt and injustice in terrible things happening and kids like. Abused kids all second I'm just like. I can't handle this like I can't handle this like I. Just like got on my. Wayfair and all the WHO I can't. I can't handle the wear of Mike that has to not be true like, but I'm just like. God. Why are we in this broken world? Why? Why is it so broken? Why are we also broken terrible to each other another so much good wise, the bad so bad. because. There's a cleansing. That's going to happen. We all know about. Let me taste and asked I have not read the book of revelations. I am terrified to read it. Mom I'm like you gotta read and I'm like. No let ignorance is bliss. Let me chill for a minute, please you know what I mean, her mom. So this is the thing. And I've had this conversation with my sister and I'm giving an talking to you just like talk to her. Talking to you just like I would talk to Thomas or anybody. With no filter. This world is terrible. It is. You have to be that little bit of Ray of light. So much darkness that you have to be that Ray of light. You can protect your kids as much as you can. And being good situations and blue, mindful of WHO's around you when you're like now you gotta be out. You got to watch a kids at the grocery store like somebody could take a daughter and is all this crazy stuff. You can't go outside and play like we used to. You know you have to ask God to give you the strength the knowledge to make the best decisions that you can't his mother. And I told my sister said listen, I'm not on the frontlines protesting downtown, Nashville. I don't have the money for bail money, but the hell I don't have it. Can't be away. Who's going to drop that baby off the daycare? So no I'm not going to be down there with the San. It doesn't mean that I'm not for the calls. It just means that I can't do that. That's not my calling Jesus. Okay, but it means that that can't find petitions. It does mean that I can send e mails. A came that I can't call offices. And talk to them about Brianna, Taylor, and do those things I do what I can K- I can't save the World I'm not Martin Luth became, nor do I wanna be Martin Luther King. He was a great man, but I don't have that type of power. I'm just trying to keep it together in eighteen forty six. Without this place falling apart. You know what I mean. Like, everybody has their own thing that they need. The kids have what they need. Your husband needs what he needs from you. You need what you need from yourself. You try to be a good daughter. You try to be a good friend to your friends. Everybody needs all different attention for senior career. That now you're running your own career. You are footing that entire operation. You have all that pressure at flight, and then on top of it you watch the news and there's so many things at break your heart I'm like. I can't like sometimes I I literally have these moments of God on. What am I supposed to do with all this knowledge I know that is terrible things happening because I know there's good in the world to and I know you know that we have these sparks that everyone has to find, but. What do we do with all this terrible knowledge and I'm just like I think what you're saying is right. We have to do what we can do our lives with our. Facing your own life, you can't throw this wellbeing of your kids away like you're saying. Even though you support the 'cause like you can't risk the consequences of what would happen. Do you gotTa keep? Your boys twenty year old girl who lives by herself in an apartment who can rally have girls together with insides. Go downtown March. No, but you know. HOW GREAT! There are those girls out there that can do that. For that yeah. That part of the footwork. That's this is the generation that is the generation. Change our fair out parents, the baby boomers. They don't WanNa do that. They saw their families saw their loved. Ones marched with Martin Luther King they're not that those are the the generation of the people that will stay at a job for sixty something years and retired from that job then you have. The genetics who have a little bit of both we have the creativity that the millennial has we have the passion that they have, but we also have that realistic stuff that our parents have it. We're kind of in the middle which makes us these. I think the most amazing because we're the best of both worlds, but I leave that to the young ones. Let them do it. Let them do it. Let them be that I will support them, but it's just like. What is there? What are the young ones Bob is change? Their Bob is we see what's going on. We're going to actively get off our butts and do something and I applaud them I. Applaud them and I support and I do with the way that I can without putting myself in jeopardy without putting my family's life in jeopardy telling you. Know what I mean not that I've ever been in jail before, but I'm just saying I dropped out the bills bondsman all the time and I know that people got put up ten percent, or whatever not doing that I'm not going to sit there and be arrested in Abbott on my record. You know I'm just I'm not a freedom fighter. Fight in different ways you know upgrade for freedom fighter, but you're not going to soccer. It yeah. I Makes Sense I told you what you're saying in what I do. I donate to where I can donate a right to Huachen right in take the time to send any male and are called offices and do what I can and I make. My kids aware of what's going on, so my son, who is twenty years old, who is an African American kid who is? Who feels safe and Mount Juliet because he's lived here? So all the police officers know Brian, because they've all come to his basketball games or his football games, so he can drive around Mount Julie didn't feel safe, but this whole time when he was away from college, people don't know. He was quarantined in his best friend house. 'CAUSE I was like you're not gonNA. Come out to Lebanon, part of your education or one of the things that you have. Have to do for your classes is to run two miles every morning and you have to close evidence Cinci your professor because you're in this class, and that's part of what they're one of the. You can't be running over here in Lebanon stare. People don't know they're gonNA. Pull you over. Wow, said their school. Part of their requirements is actually run, but like now you're so right like you can't just be a black man being in innate mean. God curry this crazy. This is truly how your your family. You have to live thanking of this stuff. When Brian was here now he's in Knoxville. Is with US coaches his in his dorm room. On unperfect check in with an every night on the happy. He's back to school when he here and he was in Mount Juliet with his best friend I would call them every night just to make sure when they found that second kid hanging in Texas. That second blockade hanging off our call Brian that night, and told him what happened and I said I need to know that you're okay and he's like mom. I'm just gonNA chick-fil-a in Providence. Anita to hurry up and get back to the house. It wasn't that anything was around going on, but there is this just deep fear after seeing that come across the newscast on my phone about the second person being found home. And you're terrified so God. Curry! What do we do about this? Like? What do we do not even have to have the conversation with mud. WHO's by racial who says why can't both sides love me because on both sides? Say they're. Said Baby, it doesn't work like that. They don't just love you because you're both sides. When you look at Dylan, you'll think the Dylan's. Hispanic like my kids are way lighter than me and. Eight has hair likely select a little bit. Can Tell a little bit, but when Dylan is is hairs like currently you know. And I told him I said no, he. ACID. To be good to people, but you have to know that there's people that don't like white people, and there's people that don't like black people in you constantly have to show them how you are a loving person, and you just ask God to cover you. Ask the. All you can do you have to tell got to cover you until all of my kids assist you. Guys are covered by the blood of Jesus. You know, and I know that it. You know people are like my sisters like. Deep Curry, or when did you become so? It's not about that when people are dying. When your life feels like it's falling apart when your marriage does like it's falling apart. Your career feels like you know. All these things are happening. You get close to God whether you want to or not. What are you learn in this season's? What do you take? How do you get close to God? How do you let him take over when everything's falling apart? You stop talking so you can hear his voice. Stay still. You listen. You you look around you and you figure out what he's trying to get you to do in you. When it feels right and I tell people that frozen to is so much deeper than what chocolate ever imagined I loved cartoon, and there's a part of the movie where everything looks dark and dim in an honest says you know you have to do the next right thing. You just gotta get up gotTA. Take one step. You gotta get out the bed. You GotTa Get Your Stop Cup of coffee. You gotta get those kids you got gotta do the next right thing. You've got to keep moving. So how do you do when you're brokenhearted? Like? How are you? Have Real Talk. How are you going to navigate this next season? Being a single mom like I i. my heart is with you because I know you're going to amazing and I. Know Your Your Children Thrive. You're going to thrive at like. How do you walk into that season, you know. I know that sometimes. I can be really cheesy, but when giving a bath, I sing to him. Every single night. It's always dizzy. Song every single night I think to him. With Dylan I wake him up every single morning by tickling him. Cameron is a teenager, a work his nerves, but I always say. Let me tissue lineage. And with Brian I'm just like so. What girl are you dating like? I immersed myself in the kids. And I listened to a lot of il-sung united a lot of Christian music. There certain songs that just that I need. You know. And my heart breaks. My heart absolutely breaks for for for my husband because unlike. You have a problem in. You have an addiction in. You need to get help. In you need to talk to somebody I, don't want anything bad. To happen to him. I don't want nothing but the best for him and I was like listen. We got two big couches. You take one take. One can have the kids over your house, and you don't have day on council. What's he doing? You know what I mean so. You just you do the next right thing. And God will take care of you. When you're kind to people, you come from places, love you. Try to be honest and not mean and and just be good all around good. God bless you for it. How do you apply that into the racial injustice in the world? You Change One person at a time. Like I'm like what? This is like the question. Like why is it how? How did it happen like this? How did you get going? All this is so far beyond us that you would never even imagine. This is stuff that's been happening on centuries in decades and decades, and it goes all the way back in this deeper. This land has always been fucked up. It's always been terrible. It's now things are coming to ahead. Is Things have always been happening? You heard about to park rapping about this stuff. You heard about all of this stuff. You know the Rodney King riots, you. I mean I was literally in over town in Miami and. And I was a little girl. When the riots they're happened and I don't remember them, but sister does in my mom remember. Standing in all of the stuff has been going on, but now on the way that technology is going. You can't hide anything. Everything done in the dark is now people are seeing it and people are being called out for their racism, and they do not like it because they have been for years thinking it was okay, it was okay to stereotype and I give that a lot. I mean there are times when I go to jobs and I go to interviews and I'm like I can't wear my natural hair. I have to go put away gone because this may be too black for them. To. Even with even when it comes to my business. Even when it comes to my business when you look at curry when you hear curry, you don't know what you're GonNa get how people think that. I'm in BMA in and I'm like no. So. They see my pictures on my instagram and you're like. Are They not going to hire me because black? Are They not gonNA. Do. In if you notice in the floor, world I have a lot of floral friends. I'm not trying to take anything from them on no competition to them because it's about community over competition. I want the best front for them. If you got your brand new studio girl, I am so proud ing how hard it is to get your own studio. He know if you book this big huge wedding this celebrity. I'm so proud. Do you need help? You know. What do you need to make this amazing? And when you try to be good to people, that's what you have to hold onto. You have to hold onto. Know the entrusting God's going to bless you. Or the thing that you do for the way that you are for the way that you treat people my next door neighbor if you see him, you think that he was older racist White Guy. And it's about having conversations with people. In his name's Thomas, to which is so weird, I'm like my husband's name and now me and Mr Thomas Talk every day. Just not he. Just people aren't aware they're not aware. They're not aware and they thought that I. was. You know they think when they see a black family? Move into their automatically hoodlums or that the kids are bad that we're going to be loud and messy and dirty in Anne leaser. All stereotypes that people believe because of what they see or they re like. Every black girl is not from love and hip hop. Were not fighting in throwing drinks on each other. Only even watch that trash. I don't even have cable. NETFLIXING business blessed. In that. There's not anything more you need the GNAT. Who? Do we watch jeopardy every night? Because we want to make sure that we're not having early, have the dimension. Thomas. Generally we know that answer will have Bob each other. You know what I mean. It's just come. Okay, a McKay with and I know. This season is going to be different. It's going to be difficult. It's going to be difficult for the kids depending on how I handle it. Depending on. Also on you. What are your intentions on handling this? How do you intend to handle it? So I mean I, know that I'm GONNA move back to Mount Juliet at the beginning of the year. so. Dylan made a choice. My nine year old made a choice to not go to school to do it online and I'm like. Because now you're not going to be in and out of schools. Different teachers everything's GonNa be online this I'm taking this time to continue to focus on the business, but to also. He'll. He'll. I went through my closet today and I'm like. Why do I still have my major at jacket from high school? What is going on Kerr? You Got Stabbed. Go. If you'RE GONNA move to different season in your life, you have got to let go and I mean that in so many different ways like you got to let go, so that's what I've been doing a challenge myself to start walking two miles a day. You know completely changed my diet because. I I have ulcerative colitis than I had I've had it for fifteen years, but now with the level of stress, it makes it worse than you have flare ups, and all these things so for me. It's about being healthy on the inside and the outside in a repairing everything that feels broken. As giving yourself time in space and Time and space on a ride a lot more. Absent things that I want to say and. Not Creating a book of not doing any of that, I'm just writing it down. I need to write it down. I need have checklist. I need to be prepared. I need to have the kids be prepared. there are some moments where you're gonNA. Find me overthinking in some moments. I'm just going to be like. It's fine. It will be okay. It's fine that the chicken isn't defrosted. We're not GONNA die. Green. You can handle so much. I feel like a wing it. Are you tired. Energy you're just you gotTA. GOING ON I was tired in my soul. I was tired in my soul. You've been tagged wannacry. I'll yeah. I have cried several times one tired of Jelly I looked at Thomas and I said, don't go. Do you know we could not have these last two kids. We can be traveling the world right now. Told that. Babies later light in. This turned into a personal conversation. This is not even a podcast. This is just like me and you kicking it and. People in everybody always asks me like. Why would you wait so late to have? The other baby said because Dylan came to me one day and said your mom. That's my dad in these are my brothers, but nobody looks like me. Oh Said Thomas, we gotta have another baby. Dating. Somebody beautify where you know. I never even thought about that. Gashi. This is the thing like all these things. I would never have even thought about. Yet. A lot to think about in your house. I do in your. Job. I don't know how a Wambugu I'm I'm telling you. I'm telling you. If. When you think about how amazing God he is I don't understand how people do not stop where they where they stand. This man. This! This God had created. He created everything. Parted the Red Sea? He created light. He created breath. He created everything. Why do you think he created the darkness and all the pain and suffering? It was part of the alternate plan. What's the ultimate plan. The ultimate plan is to when you're done with this life to be with him. There's some people that are not gonNA make it. You know. You just have to make sure that you and your family and your loved ones are going to be the one to make it because there's going to I, mean it's scary to know that we're getting older and we're GONNA have to leave our kids behind because you're like what type a mess Amal my them with. You know I contemplated even having a baby because I did not WANNA. Leave him in the foolishness. You know, but you have to know that you do the best that you can. As a mom, you have the kids make the best decisions. I talked to my kids. I talked to my kids. Like Brian wanted debate. He's vaping. And I'm like fool. You Got Asthma. Would you babe? Deductible to pay for you to go to the merchant. INSIDE MOM You know, but we talk about things we talk about it. I'm like listen. You're going to have to be on oxygen. You get older, you make. She got a good policy. Hope you make it to the NFL baby, because who else is going to push you around with I'm not going to be here. Who Can? Imagine you, a concentrator Medicare may not be around when you need. It didn't work. Did you scare him out of evening? He's slowly. He stopped. He stopped any slowly sunk in the. Game in the staff and you know all the kids. I've just tried to teach everybody what are can in hope to God that they make the best decisions, and we talk about it as a family and I feel so empowered in so free. Because I actually sat down with my husband and told him how I felt good for you curry. I said I want you to know that. A hired a lawyer I said I know you think I'm GonNa, stay around because I've stayed at the six times. There's a moment I cannot I'm raising nothing but boys. I can't allow them to think that this is okay in this how you treat women. At. This loan because when I look at them and I have that conversation with my kids. I can tell them wholeheartedly. I tried everything that I could. At bought for you know really did out of done counseling. After all of these things in just comes down to me, not being enough me. I'm not enough for you to stop what you're doing. And, that's okay because I need to be enough for me. Well in I've with people. We will have all sorts of. Insecurities in Roadblocks in their own life that really. Mess up the person they're with. You know like people have their own little shit storm that they've been dealing with for whatever reason for so long that's herniated these habits in these things they do to fill some sort of void, and it's just a hurt. People hurt people, whatever reason that broken is that we have inside of can manifest and it manifest in all different ways and. Oh, I'm so sorry are going through this I. Really. Am You know what not okay? Easy is. I'm okay. God is about to do some things in my life and I'm so excited to see in so. I've been I've had hotels. Reach out to me on when the hotels downtown Nashville starts getting backup going. They want me to provide weekly florals for their lobby, and for the all the different floors. Get off the elevator. Have some of the biggest weddings to date as long as Kobe doesn't ruin them on APP, some beautiful weddings planned at the Cordell this year at a real McIntyre's place in Cherokee. We're talking really really nice stuff I mean I'm doing this one wedding I'm literally. Beautiful Floral Chandeliers over the dance floor. And this this bride! Doing is wonderful, Byu beautiful huge arch full of greenery in white florals. These pale, I. Don't know if you've ever seen in Pale Pink hydrangea abysmal see Yummy is saying you've ever seen your life. And and so it's. And she's walking down the aisle right at Ed Golden Hour and she wanted all these candles to light the pathway, but in there's grass you know in the Cordell. Right out there where they do the ceremony and I'm like, and that's the designer coming out of my girl. We're GONNA put all of these camels organised system on marble slabs girl. We're GONNA create this beautiful walkway for you. That's the stuff that gets me excited to know. It's the creative juices that go in with like a like. I said I'm not here to just do. Anybody's event dotted like a put my soul into it a put everything into it, I make it so amazed and so special. For them and my alternate goal is to have a whole production company. And that's why. Does not mention flowers in the name. Because God showed me that it's going to be more than floral. Wow, I don't know. Would happen. But some major things are going to happen in my life and. I know when I'm going to be ready. I'm, GONNA I'M GONNA. Be Ready. That's what I'm doing now is preparing in being ready for that while. You are so inspiring I! Mean you have your decision inspiring woman? I WanNa talk to you all night, but I'm going to have to. Because I'm just like I would just talk to you forever forever. I WanNa talk back about. The moment that happened because I wanNA talk about our story in like when I used to I had no idea. The moment haven't right before. He met US where you spiritual awakening. I had no idea that you felt. Those feelings coming into the conference that day. I had no idea that you were. Feeling being all this. I had no idea because you walked in and you are so. fun and vivacious, and you're so. Caring and you just like had such a warm energy, and we started talking immediately, and I was just like you. I would have never in a million years thought that you walked in there, feeling nervous or whatever and I just think that that's. On she did she, she picked up honours she was. Rosenheck. That's what we're talking about. She is next level I mean. Man, can you? Said Curry. We've gotta get to the House. We gotta sit down. We gotta talk and I. Mean When I say. That's like a sister from another mother like what I say absolutely love that and she will go to bed and you would think that we were friends forever. It is like no, we. But that's how she, isn't she? When she genuinely connects with you like that's how she is an January. Lee stands up for what is right all the time like. Is All about it. Grab for heart, but. It was intimidating what? Skipping this cleaner. drizze I mean. Did they call each other girl? What are you wearing today I'm going to wear. You had been cold. That reminded me of maid in Manhattan a Jennifer Lopez had. Style is out of this world i. mean she is just. Awesome but Go to the back and start doing crunches. Now is a definite belt. When you told me you just had a baby. She got an crap. Tap Fat baby six. Different going to the back. Do, just talk though incentive everyone getting all like caught up in their own little worlds that he did that day. We all just talked and became friends that shared hurts you chunk up to an end until my kids all the time. They think I'm lying because I used to work at hooters. Back in Miami never believed it, and I had to pull out of uniform and and I was like you're used to be the ship. You know you have that conversation with David it, but you know what I said. You know what it's okay. Because I rather be I, WanNa be pretty on the outside and the inside when you are in, but I have to be okay with me. Absolutely the love the skin that I'm in and that's what I'm learning to do because I feel like. This is just being open and honest. When you're dealing with someone who is stepping outside the marriage you do look at yourself is if you're to blame I, can totally some. Pretty not M I not. Stylish, enough, and my not getting too old. You start questioning these things, but there's light bulb that goes off this a ha moment word think it's not you. It's really them. You know I was. Talking the other day, What you're saying happiness I think this is a book title or some sort of title. Happiness is an inside job in its told. It's totally inside job like you're saying like on the inside and outside, but it's up to you. It's up to me. It's up to everyone like it is up to us to be happy in. We have to do the work to become that and it's hard work a lot of the time and. We got to protect it and nobody. Happy People can add to your happiness like I mean of course like our children I mean Allah Gosh so much joy. They bring their lives an all the other feeling, stupid so much joy in love. You know like people can add your happiness, but if you don't have it within yourself. Then, no one can give it to you. Know, it's almost like It's almost like I was had discolored to me in this light about me, and then all of a sudden it just kind of went gray. And then I. Don't know why reference everything to a or cartoon, but it's like trolls. You Know Avenue trolls when they at the end of the movie when they all Kinda just lost their color lost their music and lost their strings, all of the trolls turn gray, but they realized that the music was not coming from a string it was already in their souls, and they had the music inside them, and so when they realize that that's their color started coming back. And I'm just like. These are grown adult people that create these movies for kids and these movies have meaning. And they have great moments in bad moments laughing moments like there's a documentary actually on behind the scenes of the making frozen to and on plus when you watch Chit. I mean if you're creative, you're gonNA, absolutely love it because it shows everything from the beginning of how these newbies are made, I mean literally. It took six years to make Rosen. Dave been worked. Yeah, and and it's like so is so deep, but the meaning behind the movie. It's the. Try to find joy wherever I can, and if that makes me a little kid I'm telling you when I get depressed girl I go straight to the Disney store. And that and I go I go to operate. Go to the to the Disney store, and then I. Go get the almonds. Yes and that's like my. Day Is. To. Let the kids go and have a good time and buy something and I don't care I. Don't look at the Price Tag. Just get what you want it. That's night-clothes, and and I have this addiction to coffee mugs that people don't know, but I have ever single Disney coffee mugs. You could possibly think of apples dizzy makes you feel good. Does he's happy? And then you've got people who try to ruin it for you and tell you how dark Walt Disney wasn't. I'm like daring. Something! Like every good thing is getting ruined. The que say coming to ahead. We gotTA deal with it. Is, but you do just focusing on. Being. The you that God has called you to be. Can't get totally totally consumed with all the pain and suffering else. We're going to be ineffective in the world at tonight. Tommy myself if I? Feel so sad in broken for everything terrible going on in the world, and what good am I because I'm not going to use my light in my. Whatever I'm supposed to do, however I put my love into the world. I got to put that eleven to the world. I can't be so broken. With every. Agree, but like it's hard. I get wrapped up in my feelings for how sad the world is because it's so heavy, but then I also like okay. There's also love and I got to be a part of the love. You know I've got to be a part of the love in like shed, light or canned like you're doing it. We got to be part of the love. And we all gift. Here's a bad day. You'd get glasses the wide and you say hey, we're going to. Our moral. All you can't do you know what I mean. My guts eggs. If This Day has gone to hell, I'm GONNA drink wine I'm going to take these two Melatonin Ghani's in I. Am going to start the makes day in in. In I know you gotta go? And I know we're wrapping up. But you gotta hold onto your joy. You GotTa fight for that, and you have to be selfish and a little way in so when somebody calls me or when like my mom, if she calls me and she wants to lend. Had Limit What should tells me. I'm like because you can't I. GotTa protect his happiness. It's hard for me to wake up in stay. Happy and stay joy bowl, and I cannot have anybody else. Take that for me, and they don't understand I'm so connected to people that I allow motions to transfer onto me. A very. You're an empath, metoo. I have to cut it off from like girl if you call me and usable. That's. The problem. Like I'm not even I'm not. They're pissed. You're not paying for me. You're not paying in me. There's no cash shop going on. I'm not billing your insurance I will be an ear for you to listen, but you also gotta give me something. I can't give you all the me and you don't give me laughing in everyday. You're calling me with you know so I'll try to protect myself in that way in hold onto my joy and my happiness, but the end of the day I don't know what the hell doing a winging it I'm here. In a great job. Great job. You said in I actually wanted to talk about this just really quickly. Don't we've got her up? Because otherwise, we just talked reverend this. Six part cast, but I have been hearing a lot about black joy, and I actually wanted to talk to you about black joy. Explained to me what that means exactly. For me personally. It means being happy. With who you are. Finally being happy with your color. Because for years people made you feel. People made us or made me feel like black wasn't beautiful. And this is an odd told. Thomas the other day. I said, said I'm so. HAPPY TO BE BLACK HE FIT. What does that mean I? Say Okay. I'm okay in my skin color I. Love who I am. I Lou. I'm just I said okay, I, said you know next dot have long braids in my hair, but I'm okay. 'cause normally prior to this was six months ago and you wanted to do this podcast with knee I would put on a wig. I would put on a different outfit and I would have a full face of makeup on because I was trying to feel like I was a Nas. More couldn't. In it's about being happy and the black joy comes in about. Embracing everything! Embracing everything in being okay. You do such a great job of that. You are such a light to this world and I. Think you are drop dead gorgeous on the inside each. At I love your work that you're putting into this world through your events, and all that it will grow to be in this continuing to grow. I appreciate your perspective and your fight for your creativity into the life that you want to live and that you nothing stop you that you still being a mother number one. I I admire you and moving into being a single mother like I. Admire you because I know you're gonNA. Do An amazing job and you're GONNA. Be Great example on that. And, we need great great examples. We need great examples of how to parent and every different way, and I know that you're going to be such a great example and I appreciate your friendship. I really didn't. Mean Go. Grudges. Asset is something special about these women. You know. I've known Kathy Thomas for years At this I kept thinking. Wake up, drinking ramble I. don't even know how you fat like she's. got. But you WANNA feel empowered as a creative like she's the one that's GonNa do. CAPI supports every crazy idea that I ever had I can call them, but I grew to take pictures of this. She's like okay. You know she's just like. Let me. Be Me in in. That's one thing that I love about my friendships in my relationships with with all of you ladies as Y'all just allow me to be mean you don't ever make me feel Like I'm not enough or not wanted and and the fact that you. Made me comfortable. You didn't even realize it when you start with prayer. You've just broke down every barrier. Do you understand. You broke down every barrier in that moment, because at the end of the day we are all children God. You broke down that barrier in on felt comfortable, and I'm here looking out at the Sea of women, and we are all different, and we are all beautiful, and they're all looking at me like I'm the shit and. Many people came to me. And I made so many friendships in they text me. They message me and. I was like what is going on and must and we're. We're GONNA. Work with this. and. Have Stock in lease. Talk about movies a lot. My oldest sister explained to me. She said the Matrix. She's as. You are neo an don't know your Neil. What do you mean? She's like you are the wound. And I was like greatest too much. Wish I don't the. And she's like no. You don't understand like your neo. One. She just. Because I always say Oh, I'm okay, it is. Okay what flowers. Home! Okay would sing in okay with the and she always says like. No, you're not okay. You're actually really amazing, and you don't know it. She's like oh I cannot wait to see when you discover that you are neo girl. Oh, I cannot wait to so basically. I cannot wait to see when you discover that you are. and. Worthy an amazing have all these talents, but yet you haven't let yourself st how great and worthy and talented you are, but it's about to happen. It's happening. Stop Bullets. I'm telling you it was just it was his moment. It was like. The People I. You see you're starting to believe it. You might not believe it all the way yet, but you're starting to grasp it. I am an exciting adventure. I am so excited for you because I see it in you. I totally see it in you and not only do I see it in your talent. I see it in your perseverance. personality I see it in the way you choose to navigate situations and step up. Be Positive, even like how you said you get each boy, a different thing to make them feel loved and cared for and happy like you're intentional. You are amazing, human curry and I. The elder blessings you keep giving us in this in this world and I just great. What have you a friend I wrap up always with? Leave your light. What do you want people to know? Or want to know. That God heals in God fixes. That is my life right now if I could sum it up until one statement that. That, is it? He hails. Fixes there's no problem to make for him. Got To believe in it. You GotTa believe in fate this scary to put your trust in someone you cannot see for, so you stood touching things. Wanting things to be tangible when. In It's there. You have to have faith. You literally do in an I remember. I was teaching Thomas about faith. And he's like I. Don't understand. Wasn't Harrison Ford. Was the movie Indiana Jones? When he walked across. That region couldn't see it. And he threw that little bit of sand in dust on it and he saw the bridge. That's failed. You can't see it. It's there it, but when you see it. If they all had a get it, you know. God is love. He's GonNa fix all of this. He's GonNa fix the president. Is GonNa. Fix all the injustice. She's GonNa. Fix It. We can help along the way. But he is the one that's going to demolish it all. And everybody who is not of God is is it's all gonna come to light, and they're gonNa you know I'm not wishing any bad on anybody I. Don't want that, but they have to know that when you don't do right. It's GONNA come back. These all these officers that are people for no reason. You know. Saying that, you're not racist because I got I got a black free and I don't mean nothing. Nothing when you got your foot in somebody's dam neck. You know. We have to trust that it's going to. It's going to fix. A self is going to be a long to fight in. We just have to be kind in the process. Has To be love. Mobiles. Hurry. Thank you so much for sharing your heart in Seoul. With me were welcome. Appreciate you and everyone go check out curry co events on. Instagram it makes me know been talking back the businesses hold and I'm. told the whole night. Okay okay. So it's like the career now that's like the overarching backdrop. The really want to get in the heart and soul person. You know that's that's. That's a good staff. Me and don't and don't follow me. If y'all WANNA see like. Just! Boring content. You do all the captions to like. Your actions are very heartfelt. I copied you i. told you that in the bathroom. Because you do like a picture, you'll do like a word like. WHAT THE WORD V! You'll have to pictures framing the word because you're emphasizing what that post is about so I started doing podcasts. You microphones on either side of my new podcast. Run by microphones and I got that from you. Listen I'm happy I could give you something. and. I'm telling you are absolutely continue to do what you do. You're not making any mistakes. You're not making any mistakes at all, you're not you're on what you can and you're given. You're doing it with thoughtfulness behind it. You're not doing it because you feel like it's it thing to do. You're doing it because you actually give a shit. And that I appreciate. Tell you. I know we gotta go? But I'm not gonNa tell you how many people reached out and they want you to do things. Because black lives, matter is in right now and like girl, we to feature you and if you don't WanNa, feature me before. Now? Hell been black converting. Them. You know and it's just like no. Let me for me. I don't want to be on your panel talked about Racism Annatto WanNa do this. No, that's not what I'm dealing away. Would've blush from. For problems. Lives. Thank you so much love years you curry and. Thank you for coming on and just being so honest? And sharing your heart with me. Levy lot girl. By.