MBA1203 Guest Teacher: Martin Moore- How To Handle Tough Conversations with Your Team
Oh, one hundred dollars VA show. The business pot gas were retailed tough business topics every single day with her daily ten minute business lessons for the real world, your host or coach teacher Omar's in home. Also, the co founder of the hundred dollar MBA complete business training and community online. And today's episode is a guest teacher episode on our guests each episodes. I invite a guest teach you a lesson on their area of expertise today. We have Martin more from your CEO mentor dot com, and he'll be teaching you how to handle tough conversations with your team Marne. Moore's the CEO and founder of your CEO mentor dot com as well. As the host of the no bullshit leadership podcast check that out on items. And he's only give us his strategies to tackling tough conversations with your team. Yes. I'm talking about confrontation. I'm talking about giving just in time feedback. I'm talking about. Having those talks you don't look forward to. But you're blind should be Cousy or the leader of the team. You're the leader of the company you are needed to have these conversations. No one else will today's explain to how to have the will to get over the hump and have these conversations as well. As the skill to make a happen. Hey, no, one enjoys confrontation less. You're a psychopath. Right. But it has to be done. Sometimes sometimes we have to give them the truth. So they can become a better employee so going to do a better job. So they can feel fulfilled. That's your duty as their leader so much good stuff into these episodes. Let's get into it. Let's get down to business. Today's episode of the hundred arm gay show is supported by earth class mail. If you run a business, you need a business address. But it doesn't mean you need to open up a business office, you can work from home and earth class milk and hook you up with a business address and scan all your mail, and uploaded to your count in the clouds. You can check all your physical mail anytime anywhere. I love it. I love it. I love it. And we use earth Gus mail because we love it so much an earth class mail in Tokyo with a free month to get started. Just go to earth class mail dot com slash MBA month. Again, it's earth class mail dot com slash NBA month, use coupon code NBA month. Today's guest teacher. Martin Moore is an expert when it comes to high performance leadership his strategies are practical, so you're in for a treat in today's guest teacher lesson. He's going to help you with the mindset of having these tough conversations as well. As had to take the first steps forward. So without further ado, I wanna pass it onto Martin Moore to teach you today's guest teacher lesson on how to have those tough conversations with your team. Takeaway martin. Hey goes on mountain more. Thanks for joining me today today will be teaching you how to handle tough conversation with your team. So let's get down to business. Running lodge teens with multiple lays of leads what I'm gonna share today is equally relevant with the c over multibillion dollar business will the found of the start up with a single employee. Let's be clear your later, if you have another human the relies on you forgotten support now for business owners and entrepreneurs learning the basics now will future proof you'll business for lighter. You're listening to the hundred dollar NBA show because you want to pick up the business skills that are going to help you grow the startup that it's a ceiling as the company out grows. Its founders capabilities is virtually a cliche in business at the risk of stating the bleeding obvious leaders Nate Heff tough conversations with people from time to time. But you'd be surprised how many leaders avoid these conversations like the plague and the number of rationalizations they can come up with to justify this voice is just crazy when you first start out as a leader having tough conversations is ninety percent will and ten percents skill in my exp-. If you can discipline yourself to have the tough conversations when they needed the skill will come over time. Today's conversation is all about mastering the will. So that you can learn from your experiences, and then going to improve the quality of your tough conversations with H one that you hold. To quote, my Albertson who's one of the best operational leaders of worked with hard things hard. We don't call them tough conversations because they are easy. And if they were easy, everyone would be doing them competently, but many latest don't what you need to know. Is that if it's hard it's also worth while no matter where you are right now in terms of your confidence and competence with tough conversations. There's hope fuel I've gotta tell you when office out of my leadership career almost thirty years ago. I sucked I was terrible at these stuff. You can't imagine anyone being more terrible than our was. But I was smart enough to realize that this is one of the core competencies of leadership. And if I couldn't get good at this. Then I'd never be a great leader. So I just did more and more and more of this until my competence grew to use the analogy of learning to ski independece. No, I could tell you all the things you need to do with your take to do that. Will I tell you about how to bell? You white. I continue to use your ages continue to push through the back of a turn continue to get that floating sensation. But guess what? It doesn't matter. You've just got to do enough of it until it starts to feel comfortable. It's just about miles under the skis. And this is exactly the same thing. Don't about the technique, you need to do more and more and more of it until it starts to feel comfortable. That's the bottom line. Let's move onto why tough conversations so important when people turn up to work each day. I want to know three things from they later when you boil it all down, they wanna know firstly. What are your expectations of me? Secondly, hell my going against those expectations and Thirdly, what does my future hold now? How would it be even remotely possible that people would get these understanding if you as a later on completely comfortable with giving people the accurate and Tommy feedback? They need under any circumstances to bring out the best in you people you need to be able to challenge coach and confront them in an empathetic, honest and compassionate way. And that's what I'm going to help you with in the next few minutes. Let's talk about the psychology of voidance. Why do we avoid tough conversations? The first thing is we all want to be locked, it's human nature as a leader. The mantra you have to have firmly in your head is respect before popularity. Bing leader isn't about being locked and one of my favorite quotes is from Casey Stengel, the famous baseball player and manager in the US. And what he said was the secretive leading is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are still undecided. Another as we avoid tough conversations is because we focus too much on our sills how we feel what might happen to us. We don't consider the person on the other side of the table from us, and we worry about all sorts of things like what if the siskel to conflict? What if they disagree with my sister of the situation? What if I haven't set them physics? Maybe it's my fault. The dread and fear is so free enforcing say. When you fearful of a conversation you gonna handle it poorly. And it's not gonna go will. And what happens is you've just reinforced yourself that having tough conversations is really really hard. And that you don't like doing it. You avoid those situations. Like, the plague both consciously and subconsciously all the while rationalizing while you need to have the conversation in the first place or filling yourself that. It's not a priority compared to your other busy work. When I use the expression, busy work. I'm talking about all those things that you can easily fill your day with but on the. Highest value and take away from the work that you really need to be doing. But you revolting or you procrastinating on. So we find ways to trick SOL's rationalization. And we convince ourselves that we don't need to hold the tough conversations. We should be holding. Let's see if any of these rationalizations ring a Bill, I shouldn't criticize as I don't want to be negative or Dame out of eight my people, maybe I don't really have enough evidence or examples to be able to point to I'm having this tough conversation. Maybe I'm asking too much of them. Am I to demanding a manager? Maybe give them more time. They'll improve or my favorite. They should know what they're doing. I shouldn't need to babysit them all of these aways of rationalizing to take us away from doing the work that we need to do but make his field. So we're justified in doing. So why is it so important that we conquer this and get on top of it mastering the psychology of tough conversations will absolutely change your life. If you have the mind. Set told tough conversations win they needed you'll stop fearing dreading and avoiding them you'll confidence a later is going to skyrocket and you'll people begin to perform at their Paik. It liberates you to do job and not spend Tom propping up wake performance the results you'll be able to achieve with a winning team that is confident driven and kicking goals will simply amaze you. So he's the moneyball. I give you five frames to look through till you conquer the psychological barriers to holding tough conversations. Number one. You have Judy of Kate. You'll people now put yourself in your team's position. Wouldn't you? Want your boss to have the courage and selflessness Tope developed to be you'll based whereas most bosses actually main? Well, I found very few who prepared to do the hard yards by having the tough conversations. The would help me to improve my performance without strong leadership. You'll people will be at risk mentally emotionally. And even physically when we think about things personal safety in an industrial business. If you didn't say, the appropriate standards through challenging coaching and confronting you allow pull behaviors to grow and the standard you walk past is the standard, you sit having difficult conversations sits the necessary boundaries and expect -tations and this avoids the dissonance. The comes at the annual performance review. We have to choose. Away, the give the person and unexpected poll rating or paper over the top of the cracks with an inappropriately high writing that is more along with your expectations giving you heaven sit expectations appropriately. The second France, pretty simple. You can't get results from a subpar team. And as a leader your job is to create value. First and foremost having the tough conversations will pay itself back in spades. Over time as a superior performance of your team will make your job easier your team better and your life as a leader much, happier. But if you don't face into difficult conversations your table, never lift to be bist and resulted we relatively poor. And therefore, it's yours. The third frame as your people deserve the opportunity to improve. And if you care at all about you'll PayPal you need to take these two heart because you'll shortchanging your people if you don't help them to improve if you can see performance or behaviorally shoes, would you want to give someone the best chance possible to change it could absolutely impact corre-, but to do this. You've got to go with the focus on yourself and think about them. This is what being an invested later who elicits loyalty from there. People actually looks like the fourth frame. Everyone knows the strong and weak performance. Those rationalizations we spoke about earlier will guess what you're not filling anyone if you don't deal with poor performance directly. You'll people will see you as a week later. The good ones will become resentful on the bad ones. We'll take advantage of you want. You leadership credibility is lost. You have no chance of building. A hot performing team the fifth and final frame forgetting hit around having the tough conversations. If you do need to let someone go you want to know that you've done everything possible to help them. So if worst comes to worst, you need to be confident tooted absolutely everything you could them as a later to help them to be successful. If you face into tough conversations with poor performance. Then you can't possibly have done that adequately. You'll never find it easy. Let someone go. Unless of course, you're a psychopath. However, knowing that you did everything you could will help you to sleep at not let's face it at the end of the day every individual makes choices about how they behave and perform as a later you just need to be confident. You've done the best you could for them to support that choice. So just to recap in this lesson. We've covered the fact that tough conversations are ninety percent will and ten percent skill. We briefly covered off on what you people need from you. As a leader. We spoke about the psychology of avoidance and why it's so important to you as a leader to conquer this. And I gave you five frames Tokyo, overcome your. Voidance of tough conversations. Guys, this was mountain more from your CEO, mental if you wanna learn more about practical leadership and organiz ation performance hit while whip sought your see into dot com. And check out my weekly podcast. No bullshit leadership. Also, if you'd like to pick up a free download of the five frames to help you with tough conversations, just go to WWW dot USC into a dot com. Ford slash one hundred MBA thanks again for joining me today. Beck to Oma. Today's episode is brought to you by Abby connect alive receptionists as much as we think. Most businesses conducted online these days phone calls are still so important to your company. Sometimes it's just easier to call them fill out a form or searched the FAQ's when clients and customers, call your business. They want to reach a real person not an automated system or or even worse voicemail, Abby Nikolai receptionists are fantastic solution. How do I know? Well, I signed up myself in the experience is brilliant, Abby kinik receptionists are professional the courteous. And they're specifically trained for your business, and at a fraction of the cost of employing a fulltime higher Abby connects receptionist are located in their hub in Nevada, but they sound like the right at your front desk virtual office, use them as often easy need as a receptionist or you can use help for overflow. Get a no obligation free trial with Abby connect, plus after your initial trial. You'll get ninety five dollars off your first Bill to get this. Great offer. Go to abbey connected dot com slash NBA for call eight three three Abby. Well, and mentioned this podcast. That's the number eight three three Evy, wile and mentioned our podcast or sign up today at AB y connect dot com slash NBA. What a great listen by Martin more. What a critical topic that needed to be covered. If you love Martin Moore's leadership tips, check out his podcast, and no bullshit leadership podcast and check out his website, your CEO mentor dot com, a quick story to kind of wrap up today's lesson back when I was twenty five years old. I was the head of department at the school. I was teaching I was in education, and I was managing thirty three. Teachers so part of my job was having tough conversations with teachers that needed some advice and needed. Some course correction, I I was intimidated. I avoided these conversations I just praised them to death. Right. But then I started to realize that they were getting the wrong message people that were doing the wrong things showing up late not doing their share work with marking papers. They're getting away with a lot of things and my best teachers that's issues at did their job. We're gonna get disgruntled. Hey, this is not fair. We're doing all the work. And these people are slacking off in his all because I was avoiding those tough conversations. I was about to lose. Who's my best employees, my best teachers because I was avoiding the conversations with the ones that needed, you know, some improvement. That was a whip call. I realized well, that's a huge mistake. I was making. So I took it in baby steps I said to myself, I'm gonna have one conversation a week with somebody that needs to have that kind of conversation that tough conversation. So they can improve give them feedback and give them some praises well within a few weeks. There was a huge improvement in the morale of the team as well. As the fact that those people were psyching off got the message. Hey, we can't take advantage of the system or Omar or the other teammates. So learned from my mistakes in the past when it comes to leadership and don't delay and have those tough conversations to correct course to give them just in time feedback to improve their performance. Martin more has to special gifts for you, a free PDF. Download a guide on how to handle tough conversations with your team. And a great offer. A fifteen percent discount over three hundred dollar value to their seven-week online leadership program leadership beyond the theory. You can download the guide and check out the discount over at your CEO mentor dot com slash one zero zero NBA. Thank you so much for listening to the hundred dollar VA show. If you lovely here hit subscribes you. Don't miss a beat by hitting subscribe. You get our episodes on your device automatically that way. It's ready for you. When you're ready to listen, Ron Spotify. Overcast Stitcher radio apple podcast, the cast box on everything you can imagine just hit that subscribe on right now before I go, I want to leave you with this leadership is tough and you never stop improving. There's always room to improve those room to get better. And you just can't use the same techniques on every single person people are different people react to advice in different ways constantly having to sharpen your skills. So don't be so down on yourself feel like man, I'm not as good a leader as I should be never be perfect. You just need to be on that pursuit of trying to improve all the time. All right. I'll check you into Mars episode Alcee, then take care.