#126 Terry Hershey: Soft Hearts-Windows to the Soul

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It's cutting into your exercise time it stabbing you in the back nine and it's attacking your peace of mind it's pain and it's getting in between you if you want to live CD medic target your pain at its source it's fast acting relief with active OTC ingredients plus the added benefits of THC free hemp oil welcome everybody's time ooh windows to my soul most often occur in tragic moments of my life generally in times of serious laws like to talk about his most recent post and Sabbath moment titled See With our Heart Only I want to expand and the topic a bit to include how a soft heart can open a window to your soul and we will explain what a window again for the next Chapter Charlie hedges as he explores turning the page on his life and yours jetlag from Hawaii Experience jetlag from Hawaii I don't know maybe it's just my excuse to be lazy I'm not sure but anyway today again moments that I call windows to my soul and typically is I stated these occur for me when my heart is soft and or even broken Seoul is there are just moments in life where you get to see deep inside of yourself that that is that is conscious and this is Thursday I think or is it Friday this Friday and I am still believe it or not this is weird but I'm still experiencing I am I'm very interested in our topic and we are with our good friend Terry Hershey and I would and it it requires a soft talk to get there and so I want to include that throughout my life I have discovered every now and isn't that the truth isn't that but that's not always true with me you know I call you to see what's up but let's see what he has to say on his you'll hers Que Pasa Chow talking again yeah no one knows sleep blocked off because seen inside of ourself is sometimes scary place sometimes it a pleasant place but often scary place and in and take Charlotte Hi Paul Slice to does he talk radio after a bit of holiday in Hawaii and although I returned on Monday weddings for for instance joyful moments that sought to my heart allow me to see past my conscious self and grabbed me this entrance and there's something we're GonNa talk about thin places that separate are conscious and unconscious cells are even into our soul however I've also found my soul listeners when he goes okay well I got the Miami go I appreciate that and it's just what he wants hello in Spanish you could have you could have answered in Spanish with a with a long Spanish thing that no one knows except are Spanish impactful moments we find their origin from my heart not my head my head and my heart are both essential but each just ahead head only involved the entirety of your life but it also seems to me that neglected from that is the most most meaningful post to me thank you for that that was that was very insightful and I would encourage people to listen to buy today's today yeah there's a phone calls usually somebody wants something scenes except on on the twenty one hour I find myself watching maybe two movies on the twenty one hour but I end up doing a lot of and so that I need that capacity to do that to see clearly for the puzzle pieces notice navigating whatever it is there something oh like Seneca the younger and Marcus Aurelius once that argue for the vital place of reason as a guiding light Karasu things together and so I think I see the cerebral part of me is able to to put together puzzles easily to start it by saying I think you know I'm a self fall into agreement with the STOIC philosophers of right of our life and I think there's a lot to be said for the way they appropriate reason and it's not working my computer or reading it's a good opportunity to read now as we get into this subject I wanted to goes guys as you should and and I think now more than ever to because of the rain we're bombarded with data it's it's helpful to have a cranium that can process data you know a mind that can think reasonably and and the pieces come together or don't come together and so are mine can sort of do that but then we need to let our heart take on you know I call you for the podcast but try to keep that at a minimum because I was love our podcast with you I just wanted you to know that I was deeply moved by seeing with your heart it was experience Cetera however however the heart enables me to either savor the puzzle the different functions of the head and the heart that's a really reach question yeah I know I know you you're a puzzle or green the puzzle for and I say puzzle honing because life is really about pieces anyway we don't really know what's about to happen says how you know how how it helps us make decisions and and its role it's particularly unique role unique role last year in seminary I was speaking with the first year student and asked him why did he select this particular seminary and he said it came here to discover what I believe and that always assumed that is never that never left my mind you came here to discover they were okay so I believe that the thing that nobody ever asked me what a what allowed that they experienced this day more fully ahead than it is the heart of the head is the head is obviously very logical analytical absorbs data problems and so and you can relate to this part because for them it's cerebral only in the sense that it's we we talked about giving our hearts jeans where he can tell her I started I started by midnight cry on Air I know I did too I used to I don't watch movies on airplanes anymore Shen in a vastly different and unique unique ways terry what are your thoughts on the always asked to be able to defend something for the creed nobody ever asked me what may be glad to be alive but anyway have held son was killed quite young in a tragic way and and what you believe so you're just going to sit there really is a second-half faith it just going to sit there and let your head get filled up with all of this data and I said that they didn't know they ask you about your they asked you but you believe otherwise tell me where your hands what your creed is remind will help you see that's to answer your question the mind here's a I wanna continue right and Atas then going to be your belief system now I think I think as you described it's easier to describe the aw I think that's very important problem but problem solving also great problem solving really includes the heart compared to the to our heads raw I I mean I I have an answer that the answer your question is my heart means I'm not emotionally anesthetize it means the part of Terry's how would how would you define especially after postseason with your heart how would you how would you explain to us with the heart is even spiritually dead souls can cut into separate from other souls and never feel if they never feel he said but living sensitive souls and I want you to name it and I have to defend also and so it's fascinating to me that I was there's a story that I've told many many times Herald Kushner was a writer that's a guy who why good things happen to bad people trying to get him to use his head to it you know not necessarily figure out why the death was that you cannot rise above and move past it those are the two things in other words they allowed me to come to life in the small whenever asked you that that's that's interesting that you say that every call anyone get close to me he said what I lose in part of my soul he says we believe that in order for life to be good or contained understanding rip something and and so what I WANNA do with a heart as Iran Iraq to let it neither one that sees this and are easily hurt he said I don't like either but I when I protect myself against the danger of loss teaching myself not care or not to let marvelous inadvertently you know Hokey move pat or or something that happens that that polls at the part of our heart that we have covered that are are yeah it sounds like our hair and fingernails they feel no pain when they're cut but Linden sales leading her he said he said we're not he'll love or hope or are in other words we're being mostly anesthetize Russia that moment I see I was raised the way here's the differentiation for me because I was raised as you know bay very conservative fundamentalist religious movie there's something about it that gets me you know that the tugs at the emotional side of me I think what what happened is that inadvertently lots that's pets In Christian every book that he says that he said that I believe that was supposed to hurt and he said in in the same way and I'm and I'm with you at at I call them hokey movies hokey airplane movies I need tissues always I'm always you know it's a dumb about our mission it's novel but it was so it's about an archbishop who served as a political prisoners Iberia and then after that career boyd pain and all that stuff you know where it makes sense that's nice he said the dangerous would be some so good it's not feeling anything including pain capacity to receive something about the south of whatever amount whether it was a racial thing kindness or generosity or look that's alive and well your heart's husbands that's why and there's so many ways that we want to adding this sense of Rome and anyway he becomes guy used to be person so it's like Mandela or anyways or rising dr all of those things that make us more profoundly for your life and it may be the the behavior that there's a new remember no Morris West the novelist more and more time sorry uh that allows all of those things like five tenderness and gentleness and winter and greedy and anything having to do had been studying beck studying I hate to use the word religion because not religion but I've been studying that a bit and I have discovered that so much of the text in the Bible would be got set the court my core just like twenty says is that the core Ryan touched and when I touched that and I'm accessible and so we heart I love and so what we do instead of dismissals when the heart is the hardest what I do I touch winters I said you know very rat or cover that or or or making you know just like little boys quit crying did his his his my favorite business cover shoes fisherman I think you had me read that I think he did have money yeah self doubt and other stuff that's going on in his life I can't just be more press right and this is what you know to advisors are is distilled to laws and regulations and rules and if you follow this then you're going to get to sort of the old what would Jesus do you know how Jesus that's that's the primary focus and I tell you I read the gospel of John Again are white bad things happen a good well it kind of vote with he kinda really hits both of those actually that yeah that I next great but why do good things happen for minute and I think and I think there is a place for the head and the heart A. R. N. to put the words it's Jesus plus nothing is reading the Gospels and as I and and going by is a very hard focused very focused book. Oh We got a little distraction here send a podcast last week and he's part of this controversial film that just came out on Netflix called the family and they art to work in harmony and many times I find myself and I'm sure listeners agree that I would find myself people were uncomfortable and he he is right about this and I've used this in my speech that you know they say okay we need basically asking reinforced by the art there's no doubt about where it can reinforce things to the heart there's no doubt about for example I'm gonNA making decisions and somebody would ask me why and I had I was forced to respond to I'm not able to so much better read through the heart than it would be through the head and it's it's it is so often read through the head and therefore wherever you are going to get whatever you're going to do however last week on the podcast remember ten ten minutes yeah I had I had I had go ahead but I will say rotating years it happened when I am making a reading I am it's still it's underneath in bookie when he's making decision does hope to many many other bishops statements he's not he's got too much and and it is I don't understand how you can really read that with the head and not with a heart that is a very that because I have a connection with this person and are there's the the soil in the garden becomes the soil but that's not really true you're right that that's those are two very different points but what I think the heart can lead into in this is where I want to kind of and so my God is something something there's something underneath all and so I would say I would say that you can my heart that allows me to make that decision that enables me to trust them into this tells me maybe might not be a good idea or Nabil's me they give you this really logical answer but there's something inside me that says this is the right decision and it's going with gut that's that's that's sort of seen with the heart is yeah you know what he's actually live life and stuff whether we have so maybe who has the right to trust it that the heart I have been thinking the heart and intuition are are synonyms and to put energy into someone someone personally that I might not have done before it Cetera so yeah the hard confused at the time I'm GonNa go with my gut river decision about a person who works for me and I'm going to give them a chance to do this even though the list tells me my mind tells me now I WanNa talk about windows of the soul and how they occur and what they occur because I think they're really important the Celtic the the Celtic writer Marcus Borg and he writes about thin places that when you don't I find you don't have many of those I probably have had fewer than ten probably much fewer than ten on my entire the life that I get this this view of a reality of who I am that goes goes into my unconscious and you quote you a question that I wanted to to offer to you and that you're making me think that depths of our soul to who we are really I I don't see the head as being the entry point for that correct now actions although there's an emotional response all but just like crying and a movie oh that's the social parts however what those thin places because I I liked that phrase a real lot that there is there's a difference between the heart and the soul of the head and the soul that's probably not a good decision to me however I'm going to go with my gut here and and wondering I'm GonNa go with my gut but but there are thin places at sometimes we can pass through and sometimes we can't have tuck me about ten places change our direction just a little bit and that the heart is what gives us access to the Roy much much of my life is predicated on Defending myself against something separate what I call the separate the conscious from the unconscious or the head from the most hidden parts of the soul and I I would like you to what cerebral stack all together my cerebral things I have a list here's a here's a why shouldn't I shouldn't that's my cerebral congress have to say is this I or you know like he has this he has such a soft heart and I think it's going to be to soften the church Lorde has disservice assume that when we touch that with what we would call out and lessons now high side simple just about the right that's right 'cause yeah there's just elements that that is that's definitely get back to your life with CBD medic available online and that CBS these statements have not been evaluated by the FDA this product is not intended to diagnose treat cure or prevent any disease the harder pro capacity of who I I am as well that's you know I think you're you're leading me into act reasonably irrationally any of those things or you know religion actor Christian you know right there's all these ways but you hang out with the rich the rich rails are the x and so has a child I don't have many a really young child you know you're not defend yourself so you have unmitigated your uh-huh places illustration right now we're best sean in this part of your sound you know what or Carell looks right right if you ever seen in a while I believe I have I do they go to Hawaii no or go there no then I've but not so I mean yeah I mean going with the gut says a different kind of response in one way but it's ah unmitigated everything's anything 'cause it's just they're out there and I then I'm told you know ended up raining all that and so I and and so when I the more defend myself available to then I've not seen them except me data point yeah no see Charlie arcus more like Ronald they can't afford to go to places like it's just a because that's the sort of thing that's my intuition tells me that and other words I'm reading making rea- role set have to sort of bring it in because sometimes you have to grow up being an adult and a lot of that is raining in either more well behaved or or the ritual and the gray whales brewers you know the the conversation to tell me Oh that's because the two podger harassed pods remoter names 'cause they're they're endangered species now and the orcas they go off the coast then I guess I haven't seen in Arca take that I just know because if you had you had you had you would've actually stopped if that's moving into the unconscious and ominous moving into a different place in our conscious sorta scheduled tactful reality that were moving into a place of softness and it's you know you could call it soft heart or or I since I'm such a such an advocate of the and that's what's powerful now you know we've spoken about the thin places and the moving into you know I'm not sure the first statement is life is good life is awesome this is what life should be and you you make yourself available car and I'm I'm I'm suddenly suddenly had this panic attack that while I need my phone I said what the Hell I have I have often thought about that about going into a restaurant or someplace and realize that I left my phone in my in my the things like aw and astonishment and grace and wonder and it's it's it's awesome the unconscious that it takes us to a place that reminds us of who we are what are what are DNA. I was only there pretend days but how many pictures I took in Hawaii because none zero not one single photo is all about and what gives us joy and also what brings us sorrow and and I I would I want to take a little bit of move I know pauline assist take a break so this'll be a perfect time for our break and then we can conclude and and it's an incredibly and you do receptor disservice shopping and we were trying to figure out our name it right away that's like when you walk into a Cathedral I say that because he's this last show and I went into another day something wakes up please go ahead if the thing for me when I walked through the everything and I'm talking about a thin place now whatever that little child and you wakes up and into Hawaii before and I couldn't see pictures of resolve your loved ones 'cause you're a concert goer you've been many many men concerts and and you know appreciation of certain artists your go to them several times and as you have done there's a there's a true story her what I don't need to Bite Aachen anybody at a need I I have you know unless I'm by myself I have guessed that I need to pay attention to have friends James and always offer such great insight and today we're talking about soft tarts and too thin places and perhaps even to the this is Charlie hedges and you're listening to the next chap who had Charlie and I'm on with my good friend Terry Hershey I think I can say our good friend he's been on the show so many times of course we did the next thing we take out a phone and take a picture because you can't experience it much picture do you have any pictures I took need to pay attention to that sent us a good way to talk about what the place those allows you to pay attention on Che's how they lead to realities about ourselves that are not often accessed by the Dan so the pupils stop what they're doing to go down to watch the whales because one one comes out of the water you literally you you you get good the United States when it is so controversial and there's so much so many frustrating things that that hit the logical Russians are spread they left the phone in the car so they're in the concert and he's freaked out can I enjoy my concert Atlanta medical side but but they do also hit they impact the poor the disenfranchised support I wanted to go but we will will get terry how do you how do you keep a soft heart in today's world inches world Paul asked a great question in in the midst of the break in in it's taking the that's a great question you know the you walk in and you you just all of a sudden you just so dominant and quiet and and second gardens that's a cathedral for me but there's also a thing place put the thing about this many times it takes you by surprise emergency stop just exhale 'cause the reminder so that the answer to the question is social media but even the social media gets a run overcome by Sharon Jealous Oh my goodness yes I don't even I don't even read it still the thing is I mentioned pets understood that while back but that's why those you know all the time we spend on and so that an unwillingness to forgive an unwillingness that you actually dismiss your dismissing that person completely do you think age has anything to do with that about as we as we grow up and we learn more we experience more that in the it has to do something to something kind beginning we may be except for those in the Myers Briggs that are fs you know we experience life more through the through the lens of the head Green I ended up and I see people around us we have contemporary ourselves better is rude dismissed ourselves we dismissed unthank- you know whether the couple has contempt if they have if you have contempt for someone you're doing how do you how do you how do you keep your your soft hearted in the midst of that without letting it take over letting the head and anger side takeover about something that's couple has that has unnerved the couple and they can tell within ten minutes and they can give a ninety percent accuracy whether that marriage will make it based on and dismiss the child rubens that's do you think that it's more common do you think of the heart and as we grow older if we grow older as they say gracefully we grow older in January genuine maturity okay so there is forgiveness but my my phone years due to the question of how we say soft is in all the battery that we see the lights here lies with our hearts more do you think that's possible I yeah I do actually I I'm going to for years of thinking wrong pay close attention and listen without judgment for once have no answers only good answers and Russell world to compensate you realize what a Blowhard you were in your thirties and how little you actually know you've been humbled is time to make up on then and I wanna get to third portion but I'll read the first couple portions quickly he says cross a world four times in your twenties take it all in number one Kinda facebook post is a menu of a cat or a dog and you know it's like I'm going to do something really different here there's a there's a guy named Derek severs its S. I V. E. R. S. Not sobers and and he writes blogs every back optimal and what was the number one and this is the John John got famous is way famous for work with couples do you know the number one thing that will determine naked no basically a couple of them time to fall in love the second time in your thirties to tell everybody what you've learned your full of answers since you've done so much and you have known the kind of change well how do I stay soft I tell people like for example instead of asking you You know I can tell you I I I start with a different pet I'm questions I say before I do anything tell me tell me today what what made you smile Roh big actions Terry and I WanNa talk about the thin places and the windows to the soul and windows so we've been talking about the pleasant rewards of those places in how we can access moments of our child well you know I try to do that in our in our conversations if you notice I try to make the first subject of our conversation your garden tell me about your garden exactly hood and access moments of Glee and joy and and content but but windows to the soul doesn't always mean that years the crossing the third time is to unlearn I love that fabulous and I love the fact that the the humidity is a part of that because what you accomplish in other words I can I can ask you all the questions with the paradigm of my head which are which are very easy to do in the eyes of the heart I wanNA talk about windows to the soul and Personally I find that that windows to the when you start with that they're like excuse me unless we're both intentional about it I want I want to go then get involved stay up night talking with people strangers every work his Apollo Chromosomal make a lot of mistakes you cross world the first today I read a recent recalled enemies there's Uncle Sam because he signed if I do that see that only with my head then I ask different kind of questions you know just like you said the kind of questions he asked the first time around the world etcetera and so I'm able to see my shortcomings or faults or or it's really not not not Louis Grech or easy to be mad about one of the two or I can start and I'll get to those but why cost question how do I stay it's about admitting and often but not so pleasant truth to me about myself that in as winded that you don't have to live that out but that is a part of who you are do you find any truth to that that's the whole we have just a few minutes left because you have an appointment in twelve men it is and I want to go to a whole different like who's describing it as a paradigm shift in the radio frame things and if I if I'm involved in the in the rage and hatred that poisons our world and all that stuff sola the heart to be a most dangerous playground to Delhi it sometimes requires a level of vulnerability that has not okay now now now we're somewhere and so I mean if I rather rose to change the paradigm from and it at at this at this time you know I I talk about saint through windows of the heart are the seeing yourself you know that the the you and your own skin in in a different light that pleasant thing I've ever have you ever found an opportunity like that where where you're not just not is not a guilt trip and it's it's it's not that at all it's about and you realize our capacity for for for cruelty talking Christly now my capacity for not and or stupidity and I don't mean that as a moral price tag but my point is that I do things that are the antithesis of what is when you when you are connected to your heart that gives you the capacity for humility and so to answer Paul's question see what what that what that is the whole thing about therapy if it's good for you and you're good at it or or journaling or anything when you look into meaner Terry as I came out of that and I remember calling my doctor my my md and told him that Numb I didn't call my psychiatrist as a mistakes and seek the path changed you cross the world the second time they make change and now this is the one I really like the third time in your fifties ordinarily fun place to be not talking about the kind of vulnerability that's with other people actually I'm talking quite the opposite you weeks I was sicker than I've ever been in my life I mean including flus any kind of illness and and it was I just lash out whoever's on because my anger and I assume dollars younger than I this was something I could be if I look at me I can put a price tag on I can be chagrined or disgusted or best or shamed or any of those things even my better angel or in crane environments for the better angels of everyone around and and and those should I don't know why you're going there first of all that child needs to be embrace child that's wondered hurting child have a myriad of psychological disorders not married but two or three that are that that impact me severely and I decide it'd be loved for being issue not not the together at the one who passed all this are you really you decided not to take them anymore and now you're feeling like crap I said Yeah and he says we'll take your meds and Kami when you're better you know it's just you know I could I could fix and one of the greatest questions my therapist ever said to me is are you ready that was that was simply but nevertheless it was during that time I learned through the dark side of me through the different sides of me you know I had out even know embrace I had an experience that you know I'm it helps you if you're if you're a life learner that helps you to discover different ways to live your life a what a what would a jerk I've been in certain times in certain places and and it was very very painful yet at the end of that has a mental illness to where that window to the soul open to the ugliest places of my life and I was able to see oh my indeed and told him you know I think I've got something wrong with my blood I've got a blood disease and and because I'm I'm just totally dysfunctional and really way out act and I know I'm GonNa go to the heart of things right away exactly and it's interesting when I when I have a conversation with you uglier part of yourself that has made you better right yeah because I'm not the whole thing is questions talk about a new book that you have a coming out October fourteenth two thousand nineteen titled This is the life I did too one time to experiment with not taking medication said I'm just going to go off medication and and I traded down and I went off and after about three I learned so much about me and how in it and it helped me to be a better person it helped me to understand the Faux Pas of my life we can talk the news and we did that before we went on the air and talking about the news and talk about what you think or believe that Cetera and I I can get pissed off and you can get pissed off etc or I can say life and he'll be the understand how can be less judgmental I can be more open I can be more kind more empathetic more more considerate so the places can sink me either into deep despair and or depression which I have wrestled with in my life or they can take me to a place where I just because I think that's a wonderful thing now before we close I think this is an important time your life and I want and implement mindfulness and live a life in the present yeah there are tools their tools ways to do it that's all right because I did we bury it so far that we don't want to see they don't even pretend I'm not that person I don't need to deny it so that they can be the capacity to apologize it gives you the I know you've been working for a couple of years on his on his project you want to tell us about it this is the ask to be forgiven him to forgive gives the marketing capacity. We're GONNA end this part of the of the podcast with that right there have you ever experienced anything like that the different ways to experience life giving yeah different you know seeing that seeing the here and so what are the ways that I that I'm not so yeah I'm October the fourteen now do you show ways how you can and that's an audio that's auto broker that you can get it for the people read it on their their devices to whatever that's called okay well I about the it's about mindfulness basically

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