Independence, Individually


i'm jim brawley and this is bellwether and bang bang bang in today shows shish dumping now he made in welcome to this week's episode of bellwether hubs thank you for joining a i greatly greatly appreciate it 'em this podcast is on the topic of independence and the reason it's on the topic of independence this is being recorded a the first week of july which in the united states is the big independence day celebrations so idea of independence a is front and for center in the united states is a big vacation week a and there's a lot of really fun good stuff and we get the celebrate america and life is wonderful but a i want it covered the idea of independence because i have a little bit of a different spin on it 'em now is really stuck on the word independence and i was thinking about what it was what i was gonna talk about this week and a independence kept coming out independence kept coming up and i don't like to get into politics i don't like to get into religion a on this on this podcast 'em in most of the time when you think about pendants independence at least in the united states you you automatically go like geopolitical developments in and national freedom and screw you britain we went and did her own thing in this nation state level of discussion or or you're talking about the celebration and it's all about fireworks in america and beer and hotdogs and beach chin and all that stuff so i didn't really wanna go there 'em so i'm not but but i still wanna talk about independence because i want something these podcasts lift beyond just the individual week that they are reported in a and i wanted something the transcendent and and i i was reflecting a little bit on one of the biggest things i learned when i went out a on business up for myself an end so i sort of think about independence individually and and yes we have the freedom in this country to do whatever it is we wanna do and that's nice but one of the great breakthroughs that i had as a business owner and one that i really wish i had years ago when i was working in corporate was that there really are no rules and you know my career i spent almost two decades 'em incorporate most of them in the financial industry which is loaded with lawyers and compliance and regulations highly regulated industry and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah when i went out on my own into the coaching industry understanding the fact that i had no rules was literally one of the hardest things that i could get my head around and one of my biggest challenges as an entrepreneur getting my head around the fact that they're literally were no rules i could put i would ever i want it to from my business now whether or not people buy it is something different but i could do whatever it is only put whatever i want on my website i could i could do a podcast it doesn't matter what i say i could say whatever want that idea of no rules of true independence is exciting it's fun but it's also very frightening and when you think about what it is for us individually is you know and now you've got this untamed direction direction that you can go into there is this plethora of possibility a when we think about the choices that were able to make an and i really wanna drive that home this week is that we put a lot of rules on are selves and when you think back to not give a history lesson but in the in the seventeen hundreds when the uss was a saying by by the britain they've they affectively looked at britain and said you know what your rules were not working for us the rules you're giving us and what you're taking from is not working for us an and i hear that all the time in corporate all the frustrations that people give me a corporate are generally around my my first question is why are you doing that or why is that a thing for why is that a rule and why is this a challenge and other times it's just you know people just don't stop to think about it and say well it's just the way that it's done and you say the way things done like come on right and and when i think back to my personal career in corporate the decisions i made made from my career a were generally based on assumptions that i had and they were often the wrong assumptions i often in challenge myself i never challenge myself a enough to challenge the status quo and if there is something i wasn't working from me i suck it up i swallow it i go back i'd be pissed off at work and i would just go clang clang clang at the keyboard and it was it wasn't beneficial for me it wasn't beneficial for the people i was working with and wasn't but beneficial for the people i worked for a my career would have turned out very differently if i recognize that there really were no rules and when i start to articulate what it is that i wanted to do that's when things started to change from me and when i stopped taking out these rules saying you want me in here what nine o'clock in the morning after stay here till seven o'clock at night just because even if i don't have work right i'm not doing that an icy people all the time has come in early the have the state late they they could literally leave they have nothing else do but they're just being told that the sitting there seat a and then you're a grown ass individual why are you doing this in a lot of people could fundamentally changed their their work life balance the way they approach work and they could do more interesting work if they start to think about you know what this isn't working for me it's also not working for the people around me what assumptions by making then i could challenge what assumptions are just done because this is the way it is this is the culture that's being driven at my office okay we're living in a world of assumptions are brain does it to be efficient right we just assume and that's great and and the cost of officiency though the costs of the purpose of officiency is that we lose the ability or we sacrificed the ability to think creatively and when we make these assumptions and and you know the the power of a crowd in everyone just starts doing the same thing and we go through this day in the recor keeps going and going around and it's just the way the things operate we we don't stop and scratch the record and say hey a we need to check on this assumption and say is this really the best way we can operate which is why people spend so much money bringing coaches coaches come in and say why are you doing that i go through an exercise with my clients a almost all my clients i just have them do this just because it was really impactful from me there's this guy 'em his name is richard boy access doctor richard boy at says he doesn't know the he has fans i'm super fan boy of his work i love a everything that that richard buyouts does and he's got he's a professor at case western university a i think 'em and he's got he spoke at some coaching common says i've been to and and i sat through one of his online courses and he he does a lot on basically organizational psychology behavioral change a any does a lot of these don't like fifty years of research on that so so the guy smart a he knows what he's talking about an and he has this exercise i'll put a link up to the course era page a free course you take it lets you wanna pay for whatever the certificate says that you actually sat through it 'em but he he talks about the three people that that we we have for us it's one the person we are to the person they that you want to be an three the person you ought to be any often talks about this in the context text of leadership you know who is the leader that you want to be who is the leader that you ought to be an end neck and going very many different directions and i always have my clients articulate those three people who are you today who do you want to be in the future and then who is the person that you feel you ought to be in generally almost always ninety nine point nine percent of the time a d answer is a very different and if they're not different i make them do it again because they haven't worked hard enough and the purpose of exercises to identify the gaps of where we are today and where we want to be ending joining analysis of the gap we find these assumptions were rules that are preventing us from getting to where it it is that we wanna go you know whatever that next level is that's that's are challenge and when we know what those those assumptions or those rules are then we could just attack them and break them down and say this doesn't work for me 'em an all oftentimes a lot of these assumptions that we have that prevents us from getting to the person and we wanna be the leader we wanna be v employee we wanna be these success that we wanna be or that we see for ourselves is that there are certain aspects of driven by are life that that are saying no no no no you can't do this yet you ought to be this or you ought to be this an often times that doesn't align with who it is that we actually wanna be an understanding the ought to be versus wants to be a is a very important developmental step in terms of saying look if i wanna put out my path what's my runway to say where am i gonna go and i wanna see where you know what turns i'm gonna make this is my personal gps this is my northstar you have to be all the time that are pulling you off the highway and when we figure out what it is that doesn't work for you and that's impacting your ability to get where you are to be truly independent to be able to make these choices that's the great part of independence is you get to make your choices and understanding what's impacting those choices is is fundamental to to making the right choice and so independence this week a for me is just a nice reminder on the fact that we are able to make choices and there are plenty of assumptions out there though we are making in this is driven into us from childhood 'em and no matter this this is something as simple as i don't like my job to even things more severe in terms of negative relationships and other things that are are far more serious an end we have the challenge today assumptions that we have on saying i can't do this because of acts really the question is how come a an is that really the the the the true reason why you're you're doing what you're doing a or is there anything else you could do and there's a book 'em i'll recommend this book this week this is how by accustomed boroughs 'em it's really effectively self help book he's gotten amazing story but it's written in a very casual way 'em on this topic of choice that we have choices we make a an end weaken always each day then you wake up you have choices and you can make fundamental changes if you really want and and to make that and what do you willing to sacrifice for those changes so when you think back 'em based on the history lesson back in the seventeen hundreds america toll britain this doesn't work for us and they made a choice right now you may not need full revolution a but the questions you can ask yourself are what's not working for you when you think of you're goals your ideals your challenges was impacting your ability to get their oftentimes it's it's assumptions on who you ought to be were arbitrary rules that don't really apply to you or assumptions that you have on on what you're fully capable off we have assumptions on yes i could do that are no i can't and won't even going to blow that up that's the big reflects over the weekend most of us have four days a and if you're listening to this after the fourth you could take you know just a couple of hours 'em were just a few minutes pause reflect and say what is it that you want to be how how come true independence by coming any choice that i wanted to make how could that support what it is then i wanna be and it's time extremely well spent for you and a lotta times it's it's just a matter of that reflection it's simple it's easy so that's my quick a quick hit this week it's on independence i hope this was helpful as always come visit a come visit me on bellwether hub dot com an a i'm i'm working on some pretty cool and exciting stuff and it's it's a that's good time to be a good time to be part of part about whether so thank you for listening have wonderful holiday this is after the holiday have a wonderful week and a as always i will see you out there thanks for listening thank you so much for listening now do something for yourself bellwether is much more than just a podcast join us a bellwether hub dot com where you can reach riveting articles view upcoming events and connect with other

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