Lily Tomlin "He Should Be Ousted Just for Cruelty"

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

It looks like Ernest. Okay Happy Happy Hour. Oh Yeah it's Lily Tomlin yet. Ed Is this time. We're not GONNA get sauce like we did the last time when we almost you did a pratfall. We almost killed an American icon. Remember that I remember vague. Maybe it was going up those no. It was off the chair. You have a commitment to physical comedy. Stephen on your fucking thousand years old now and it it is fantastic just turned eight. Oh my God you're thinking ancient and still look beautiful when our legend and are kind nice and thank you so much for doing this might not. It's time for Stephanie. Right now too so she could do you. You know how. I know that you've turned eighty because you left me two and a half minute but dial message where there was nothing. It was just you two minutes of Lily. Tomlin's asks on on my phone and I don't. I listen all the way through yet but I care so ray. I I know right. Are you are kind kind enough to do this because you are one of the cast of thousands stars right at the Greek theatre here in Los Angeles this Saturday for the hearts of gold gala to to benefit the LGBT center here in La who which you've already been a very generous as an enormous moneybags you have already been a very generous benefactor others have been benefactress actress and my name. I'll really got your pin. Number have just started theater. You publicly say within remember in my home. You probably texted someone your pin number by accident during a battle I might have how are you lily Tomlin. Steph you well. I can't believe we got you in between being honored. Just that's hard to catch you between you. Were just honored at the Kennedy Center. When you're eighty you get a lot of honors. There's so little time left a tick tock. No no no don't say that you look great. You are okay we did. We have played your phone message by the well. You should be careful when you leave me phone messages because I tend to play them on the air like this last one from the Lily I want. I I want that damned of podcast. I wanted to raise facial. I know the earth is a face listen. I'm GonNa Call Me Back Yard. I'm not GonNa say I just wanted to call you and see how badly humiliated myself yesterday totally drunk but anyone can love you. Love Your Show I love you. Everything's going good impression. My Gosh I should record. My message is more often than I did over serve. You and I apologize drinking champagne shipping. Yes let's say yeah. We're doing this on alcohol sponsor wish Joan well. That's the first thing I'd do if I were your her advanced person. Oh yes because I obviously have an advanced person as greeted you in my garage baseball hat. That was just so humble of you. What was that was one of the most elaborate entrances you've ever made and I had to win my way through those dogs. We all know one one of the dogs phone on that Big Puffy puffy cloud referred on one of the other ones yeah so it'd be fine and we won't have broken an icon okay now where I don't even know where to start so you you did just turned eighty this just recently hard to believe right. You know the other the other their messages. I kept I've to you know who their from no Jane Jane Wagner. She leaves the nicest messages whenever I feel down. I just listen to her messages about how great she is like. I mean this is why you guys are so this is what they were honoring right at the Kennedy Center fifty years but she's like such a warm supportive supportive person I can imagine as a partner not only she brilliant writer but she's just so everyone the beats her says. Oh my God she's so warm. She's so kind you would think he will yeah. She's then. She treats me that way. She says calmed down Lily. I've heard that I've heard of so yeah. No she's a she's a delightful and and introspective and thoughtful person yeah well and she puts up with you so yes she has yes and but that's a okay. I mean. I don't even know where to start with your. That's what everybody wants. The fifty years you guys have been together. You're one of the few ah but this is you guys have theater at the LGBT center and you must first of all be the fact that we've had such a big backlash in Gay Rights and when Dad Yeah Yeah you know you just interviewed you said in nineteen seventy seven. I'm scared maybe I'm not offensive enough. Everyone likes me too much. It's a bad sign. You can't be humorous or satirist if everyone likes you too much but meanness she says was not her style. I don't see the point in harshness. Humor is absolutely taste. Don't use to have some fucking. Shit to say about Donald Trump though come on I mean isn't it time to unleash your taste less. Yes that would be the trump has made me mean anything but a pundit about humor right what the hell can you. He's so mean. Isn't it hardly some young people being. He should be he should be. I was just cruelty. Yeah Yeah I mean. It's just sort of the door the border the cruelty at the boarder is unbelievable and just general cruelty against the air in the water and every other human being has to breathe. I apparently has his own limited. Personal snow supply of Aaron Wanda and his his sons are mean against animals in my God. You narrated that Elephant Film Beautiful. They were horror. Yes heading those dead cat yeah. I JUST WANNA Puke offensive not laughing. Just see I'm drawing out the meaning you now we can draw this out. Donald Trump's a motherfucker Ikea is you actually. I've never anybody in my whole life. I hate him so much I now we're in in the middle of this like I. I'm like how much more on the open can the reason be than this whistled thing. This is just right. It's just because he's he's not Daesh issue. Just does anything anything. Ms Probably was the earnest intelligence. There's so many acts you can't even see no simple thinking you know life life can and affirming human beings can't keep up with it. I Know No. It's an avalanche and you're just kind of trying to save yourself yeah. I'm trying to drag you into Ernestine. It's probably somebody that was listening in the intelligence community to wherever he just did. They said it was multiple acts right. Oh yes I think it was you know I have some information. That would be good. Yeah it. You know if I can get my hands on the absolute bona fide evidence I would turn turn it in a second. I still got a morning radio urgency with a whistle blower. I can't believe you've endured me for so many years just a few weeks a few brief weeks. Yeah I interviewed when I was a baby. Dj and I don't really I think my mouth move but my brain wasn't yes. Oh you actually call the did a bit as Ernestine steen on my legs wacky morning at tape. I probably have it because I remember your publicists called me. It's really wanted to know if you thought that was funny silence. I was like I was like twenty seven. It's like Lily Tom. Yes yes. She's fucking Lily Tomlin. God have you kind of pro. You are really Tomlin probably have that tape but you have nothing to play it on. Everything schedule doesn't exist around no not at all. You've you've. You've just been endlessly kind me. You've just gotten my first agent out here. You'd say yes to everything which is really to your house. I'm so nice yeah well. I told you that seventy seven article I I almost committed and that was like career suicide yeah making that statement statement it with this. LGBT come talk to us about what it felt like to not be out and for how long and how scary it was. I mean well. You know what it wasn't like. Jane and I weren't present or we're. We're really identified. We we never had well. You've seen those that old cartoon were guy. It comes out and he says says he admits he's a heterosexual. He said everybody knew it but I never had a press conference. Yeah you weren't like a tablet lake. Here's only Tomlin with a new fake boyfriends. Yeah no no and so I don't i. I've talked talked about myself for like fifty years yeah fifty. I wish I had all that tape and they've carry it with me and the tomb too boring yourself to death. Is that what interesting we all. Find it endlessly fascinating just so you know but yeah no. It's just an interesting thing that I would assume that you were such a comedy sort of icon and legend that you didn't want to be known as a gay well. I want to be identified that way as like the poster girl for struggling struggling movement although maybe would have struggled less yeah but or maybe I would have struggled more yeah will never know the answer to that yeah that will go to the formula. I mean I've told the story to and I'm sure many people will turn off now and I started no no five. I was offered the cover we're of time if I would come out. I remember and it was for and they just needed a gay person. You know kind of Oh. She's gay and I don't know what they would have done with that but they you were so they finally and I I was sort of insulted that I was pegged for that reason and not for my artistry by Roy Totally fancied and and they did get a nice gentleman from the armed services to be on the cover yeah but I got the cover two years later when I did my first Broadway way shirt. Oh didn't you've done let me look at your Broadway. That's yeah that united tickets are so expensive. I was just in New York and I just refused to go to the theater yeah. Of course I could've. You don't have the cheap seats yeah. You don't have that kind of money. That was one of the highlights of my life. I got to see search for signs of intelligent life in New York on Broadway and I got to drink champagne backstage with Lillian. Jane and I remember I had been down on and you said. Are you going through Chemo Syria. Yes you did it. I was like no. I just like you're not serious did yes you did so. That's an unfortunate fashion choice Stephanie. Yes I believe it might fit your faces on exposed but no not a bit of your show. I I believe that was shortly after the one Mama had that you know the ten thousand dollar now mini facelift yes. I feel like it was something housing very surprised to see. Lilly and to be allowed backstage and to be talking about sure yeah. It's the first thing he said to me medical things now all right. I don't know about you guys but oh I don't buy Luke lillies bullshit that she jane Fonda. Look that great and grace and Franky because the lighting you know she's just hiding from us that they both plexiglass absolutely going on because she looks some base. Yeah Yeah Yeah yeah she. Oh certainly oh sure you still think you're keeping your secret while you're not sister. Listen if you have wrinkles around your eyes if you have crow's feet if you have under eye bags eggs plex a durham you don't have now again. The lighting fucking sucks in here. You look thirty five stuff. Thank you very much. PLEXIGLASS clinically studied ceremony. Karema busily eliminates. Your wrinkles crows feet under eye bags in minutes. It's the edge you've been looking for Lily. See coming plex interim can give you the confidence you need to be yourself at work or out with friends the best part plexiglas and goes on clear so no one knows and if you keep it to yourself lily TRIPLEX DOT com. Tom Use the code sexy liver for fifty percent off plus an additional ten dollars off. That's right fifty percent off plus an additional ten bucks off this offer available also by calling one eight hundred six eight five twelve well ninety two mentioning the code sexy. Liberal Plex dern backed by a thirty day money back guarantee TRIPLEX UNDER DOT com use my code sexy liberal checkout. That's TRIPLEX DERM DOT COM okay cups. I'M NOT GONNA SUGAR MAKES LISTEN DRAGO. You drop found his name beginning sat down yet named robber but so you know sat in that chair before Jane Fonda Jane Yeah Yeah you know what I did. I called her which I told her. Are you sure she didn't sit in your chair. There are no. She sat in that chair of planning to sit in your chair. Would that conniving biaggi. I met her mentor Martin. Sheen's birthday party. We weren't there no but she said she would do the show because you guys have been really politically active. You've been you went out to state to state and all that stuff yeah so yeah so she that's how I took her into doing the show and she gave me her number and she's now. You won't forget to call me. We'll you and I was like there was virtually no chance. I told her just calling her. Was Jane Fonda Workout 'cause I was sweating so much. I was Donald J but then she said Bullshit within the first ten seconds so I don't really know how to talk to a legend. She's like Oh bullshit. When do you want me. I was like Oh this is fantastic on the phone. Call no but we have something to play for you because because this was so touching was her talking about you we did we did a best friend's happy hour with me and my best friend and forty years and Angela who are best friends for many years and they went bring the funny they don't know Oh. I hope you're listening America. Lily Tomlin has her disapproval the decision on all right but are no because obviously gregory knows just been renewed for the final season two which you said you are delighted and heartbroken. I just I've said this to you of your whole. Body works on of your finest work. I said you've seen the episode where you had a stroke was. Maybe maybe your best work and you said it was an acting so inappropriate. You're just hugely inappropriate. I think that was acting. I think I had a stroke honey. That's my life okay but anyway what my point. What is this just such a beautiful story about female friendships obviously and so I played this for for Angela and for my best friend. Let's take a listen cannot tell you what a joy and an honor it is to work with her and I don't know why I guess it's looking at your you have very beautiful skin L. L. La has very beautiful. She's a porcelain goddess and so and there's I love it when there's times when in the while ah we're shooting and dressing her or something and I can look at her skin and I can you know I can run my hands over her skin and say God you've got such beautiful skin and I know Oh this is being beamed out to the whole world because you you don't enough see women loving on chill right and and not in a gateway in your case Galvin each other yeah being there for each other and yeah and it's just it's such a joy to be part of that well. That's that is so brilliant she is. I can't tell you you know every touching just me and my skin crawls yeah say yeah. I'm going to tell us tell her she's here. She creeped you out. I think you're turning Fonda. I mean I know you're married but damn really a little you're taken. She's a bit rhapsodic yeah. Yeah I mean he's been through. She leaves gives the microphone it turns. She turns it off just like that yeah. She's a she's on the turn man. I can feel it. Many Times said to me as she left a an interview like this and she's carried on that way then she turns her and she says and you are absolutely Jane. Fonda will also be at the Greek theater at three galaxy together with Kathy gauging the couple Margaret. I Bruce Launch right ty her Tara. Tara did as you say. Did you say Kathy Griffin. Yes I did Sia the singer Rufus Rain Rain right that's right all to help the LGBT center which does does such great work in helping LGBT it really does I mean it's the it's the largest day center in the in the universe really yeah of course we don't know what that fonder mater spaces bring to us right on to really care. She will slap a huge girl on girl with tongue kissed on stage. What what are you guys doing are you. Are you performing together. What's happening. We're going to demonstrate the art of kissing part of what we're going to plan to do nice. That was the opening believe me. Jane Wagner is listening to this yeah and I don't WanNa. I say that because I think I'm no sure thing I've gone to found no but she knows your old in that you could forget which Jane my favorite stories as you told me that she listens in bed in to my show with headphones and so you often wake up with me to against against your will basically sexual assault but it's like you didn't ask me me to come to your bed but I do too. Stephanie Metoo Time's up Minnow. Was I going to say okay. Well well anyway. So where was I going. I went this way in the now way Yeah I. She's a hilarious Jane Fonda salacious. You guys you really do. She said the same thing you you did you both said lighting and I'm like no you guys look so beautiful on that show and you both are so beautiful in person so I think it's about that too. You know about aging. It's all just a little bit more beautiful. Yes well clearly clearly did she. Do you see she posted a picture of herself. Off The she was all done up for something you know and then she posts a picture that she couldn't get addressed so it was the next morning with no makeup. She still in the same dress husband. It's like a slip in general you know Jane Fonda has gone to she's going to DC in a few days. She's committed suspending four months. There till the show starts again. Yeah just working on climate change yeah. I it is amazing guys. I loved the is the first episode of Grayson Frankie. Win Your you know Martin Sheen. I'm sorry Sam yes obviously just find out and you know he says you know it's legal now. In Your Life I know I marched for. It was funny because that was lily. Tomlin political activists coming into Frankie. That's it's kind of interesting that you have to act straight yeah. It's really hard. Sam is so darling he and Martin in both are just sat great people yeah yeah he is Martin. Martin has not namedrop again has also sat in that very chair. Yeah he drove himself from Malibu and then he was he's like am I late. He was like a half hour early. I was like I late for I. It's my basement and you're Martin Sheen and then afterwards yesterday could watch Rachel Maddow with us. I let in my life another one. That doesn't have the only one that doesn't involve you. He said he said can we watch Rachel. Maddow together like I just had like a liberal nerd Gazza all my someone told Rachel that and she had to she goes no I took a picture I said here is President Bartlett and I watching Rachel Meadow together together. We could auction off some liberal wet dream. You could auction often now at the at the show on Saturday for the center enter. Mr She know about this yet. No he'll do it. Oh he will yeah he. How was that you knew him. I'm sure before even West Wing Right but oh yeah yeah absolutely and I knew him before that not not really well. I didn't spend a lot of time but yeah I I loved him. I adored Herman West Wing. Yeah Yeah. I really thought that Bartlett was the president for those hours in your face shooting and that's only when Bush was we thought that was bad when he was sitting here like why can't really be president. That's why they're saying that there's such a resurgence of the west wing because on airing flex looks because now more than ever people first of all any sentient being but I mean just I okay saying that today just as a AH I can't I literally can't take any more of his anything as voice his crimes. His daily use is important that we recapture the Senate. I know absolutely s you know we play all the time thanks to you because he won't shut the fuck up about anything ever especially Alabama and hurricane number sharp gate oh and he just kept going Alabama was always he's GonNa hit Alabama remember every tweets in a row and press conferences and how many eight days in a row it was always kept that story going right and so this came in handy thank you that comes in handy quite a bit out of that and then I'm you. Denver views cheers. Ho please I want. I want to go back to my baby. Dj Days I would like to be ingenue again interviewing Lily Tomlin for the first time so I am going who input on the little flexitime before we continue yes. I want to imagine a better time when all things were possible if you put it on right now by the end of this yeah it will have worked its before everything went to Shit. That's what I want to. The girl Ernestine was still working. The phone lines skew Alexa Durham clinically studied serum invisibly eliminates. Your wrinkles crows feet under under eye bags in minutes. You are starting to look as young as edith an right what I listen. I got the a fake eyelash tip from Jane Fonda. If you get a beauty tip from Jane Fonda she would tell you get placoderms just saying take it from me plexiglass. We'll give you the confidence. You'll need to just be yourself at work out with friends even if you're not a TV star movie star. You're like some people and that's the truth even radio stars should languid stuff and what you got you got. You Got Crows feet. You've got wrinkles. You got under eye bags. Scott at it. All TRIPLEX DURHAM DOT com type sexy liberal fifty percent off plus an additional ten bucks off. That's right fifty percent off plus an extra ten bucks off you could also call them one eight hundred six eight five twelve ninety two mentioned sexy liberal. Exeter and backed by thirty day money back guarantee visit TRIPLEX DURHAM DOT com type in sexy liberal at checkout that triplex interim dot com and now back to you lily speaking of its icons and grace and frankly I was surprised you said the one person the if you haven't got on the show yet as Dolly Parton well that is true and we WANNA sequel. Obviously we want a nine to five. That's still in the work this. They were trying to get a script okay. You guys got any ideas officer. We could work together. Let me get a call me. Too seems kind of relevant yeah yeah yeah. Oh my God that's true after the metoo movement it would be so great yeah and relevant one but we're like we're playing our real title ages fight. We have to interfere in some office procedures right right so we have to have some rationale for that right and then we have to go and unexplored. They're current office scene which is much different than what we had at consolidated in nine to five this week to figure this out here right now. What if there's there's a growing aside no climate crisis. We're GONNA work on the ninety five script why couldn't Dalia Sally and Jane and I write humbly Dahlie and Jane and me you know Jane doesn't matter so but what would you say okay as a as a person of learned person who Dali and James Tie would maybe we could we. That's good that's excellent. We could good engage ourselves in the climate crisis. Oh yes because didn't you send Hart Bill. Yes we dare you go. You could do that thing again Dan. This pretend to be a scientist just like an doctor. I'm a doctor all missile scientist scientists. They don't quote just one of your lines. I mean just incredible shrinking woman alone. I could just live in that movie. CIANCIO theon disposal. I I can't even all your movies right back in bowl. I can bowl yeah that that's that's a steep. He spirit clever yeah yeah well. You are a little bit clever yourself. How many of those Goddamn by things do you got. Tony's EMMYS grammys. Have you counted. Moss Guy couldn't possibly count now. I didn't think I don't even have time to dust them. Where do you keep them. I I couldn't even tell you know. Do you still have to be there in the backyard. uh is that when Jane and you have a fight she throws all your enemies and those enemies are sharp. They they're heavy yeah. They could leave a mark now now. Don't you wish you weren't so brilliant a lot of weapons laying around on a blunt instruments yeah Do you still have fans rocking rocking chair while you're yeah while you're pool because that's I haven't no. I have it in the house. Okay I said I don't want to risk it to the elements yeah. I and I have the big wingback act chair which you probably don't recall as vividly as you do eat us. I have the wingback chair from shrinking woman. Oh I haven't been to the new house gutted rock. Anita fans chair at the old house. Yeah Oh my God my that's why we remember much younger girlfriend that came to a couple of dinner parties who Lisa your good friend and you know. It's not my girlfriend anymore. She's married to someone else but my own to know but she was so young that first of all she was like I told her you know you can carbonate where one of my idols and she said carbonate so mean o you only saw Anne she had a show okay and then she did not know. She did not know what he was like. Oh my God and so go to Youtube and then she's like. Oh my God so funny could do she making me do eat it then. I'm like you know if you're going to make lily. Do it a whole new discovery. Where where does that girl live now up here? I've run into hiking. Oh no one she also Meredith Baxter came in and she said Oh my God this Keaton's here you are really young because you and I go oh it's bridget and presumably not Bernie but also all the president's men right yes yeah. You are a little younger than I am this tiny soc I've tried. I don't know how many times I've pitched a show where lilies as my mom the my republicans around yeah. She's ninety six. I wanted to go visit her where we have to go Charlotte North Carolina. Oh my God we know gene's family. Half of them live in North Carolina. Let's have a let's have a family trip would be really nice. Does your mother need persuasion. We'll wise. She Watches Fox News. I was saying Oh she's the only other person then giving all her money to trump. Yes she tells me and then I said the other day. I called her and she I all here's Fox News and then just in. I I was like mom mom mom. She still ever hearing yeah how she's hearing aids but she didn't. She just had the phone off the hook but I yeah so. I got to hear Fox News through my mom's phone. You're an only child. No I know I'm five. I'm the baby of four four. What about you if I ever I have a younger brother three years younger Richard Nashville okay all right. What's it like it being Lily Tomlin sibling. It's probably horrible on wait. What's the other thing you just said. You're working on some other do-gooder. With what are you doing the the thing you were. Oh the homeboys homeboy industries okay yeah humble. We're just doing a an outdoor a five K. Walk Wow. I don't think we're going to do the walk. No I'll probably like walk. I mean we'll get further and further behind them. We'll just take off getting the golf cart. They're an organization in east. La that rehabilitates gang members by giving them jobs like you can buy homeboy these chips in Ralph Sal and it's very much so so very rehabilitative I mean they have every possible service and wonderful activities and they people's lives are just change radically changed and they have tattoo removal of so many of the guys and girls have tattoos on their faces then go out and interview for jobs and stuff like that own but they don't present or they come to it happily eagerly yeah because they've had a change of heart in every way. Where did you come by. Your do-gooder ism an activism because you guys you an found amazing in terms of your energy and that you go state to state you go anywhere for finders more really more or amazing because you know she didn't really have to. She was born into high privilege. Yes I was like scratching my way. It was one way of me getting an audience. You were born poor black child in Detroit as I recall I know honestly it was a way to you know ingratiate myself into the world. That's that's why I told Rob. What's her name Robin that that her last name is Robinson surfers name. I know very well. I've forgotten but it's been seventy seven. It's been bite right. Oh yeah forty years or more and her I'm just on. I'm very fruitless. Arith- right now well. I wondered if there it was if there was gold at the end of. Let's hear help me off. Fill me OH. Is there a way I can trick you into doing any when we see the setup for that Sean if I weren't a wacky morning you are listening to station S. T. The F. P. H. That's wrong okay. That's what I want to ask. People all the time is how you raise children in Donald Trump's trump's America like people if they have to turn the television off. They absorbed your children. I I just I'm interrupting her. Don't say that don't do that that you. He is airing thing we teach kids start over again yeah over and that is the truth. Isn't it yeah I know I really do worry about every time I see a baby in arms or a baby in a stroller or a little toddler. It just makes me go crazy. I can't I know there'll be like twelve or thirteen. When the are you hopeful I am. I know you got to be plus. I'm thinking that a space thing that they saw in the sky. I think that's someone coming to save the yeah. There's been weird is life in the uniform in the universe and you would know when you yeah yeah well. Jane would avoid it and then you would know it my favorite prey of all time it really is everything you do so. I mean I don't I see don't you. Aren't you eager to find out if it's a hoax or it's just a natural phenomenon or interesting that they didn't say that it that there was an explanation the navy's he's not denying it yeah and so that's something we've never heard from the government health. It's an anal probe that is looking for donald trump's uranus giant orange planet all right all right now. You're trying to say you're me. I was because I just feel this was so kind of you traveling. You were being your between being honored in New York. You have the big performance coming up your six thousand years old. I mean I'd love you so much. You know once you get a certain age. You're just like your impervious. I know I know waiting to that. I've been looking for the hours. Those are go see if you're out here in. La You got to go see a heart of gold the LGBT Center concert at the Greek theater here in Los Angeles Available on Minister Sir Fiftieth Anniversary. Say That you get to see we'll you by the way will you bring back for ah maybe to promote the last season of grace's replay. I will wonderful so fond. Ob There Kathy Griffin bargain show a lot of our beloved will be almost everyone. That's done happy Alex Thomas where you can get tickets. We'll link to everything I love you for doing this. You're the side and I love you for being here. uh-huh Jane for listening to US every morning in bed with Jane Lillie Skin is really soft. I'm sorry we love you lily Tomlin American. This is Bob Susko host of the Bob Ceska show. If you enjoyed this episode you're GonNa. Love my show where every Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday we talk about. This guy is crazy easy and this guy is an idiot and we say this crowd because he would find the Bob Susko show at sexy liberal dot com and on Itunes Stitcher spotify Bob Susko Dot Com and everywhere else you get your podcasts.

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