#41: Mr. Kool Kat Schnazzy Pants Back-to-School School
Film i'm so excited why because the summer is coming to an end and fall is about to start and you know what that means. You know what i think i do know but tell me you know you go ahead. I'll give you the pleasure of saying. No more hot opens no more hot open now. I don't care about the weather. I don't don't care about the change of seasons. I'm just so excited that we don't have to keep up the stupid running joke anymore about the hot opens but we gotta keep doing it next year yeah but next episode will be september and we can go back to our cold opens very excited very accelerating finally cold opens opens when they used to be like thirty seconds long yeah remember when they used to be like fun and people listen passed them out. It was like in the laugh yeah. They had they laugh. It would give them just a glimmer. It'd be like oh. My goodness is upset. You're gonna be so funny. How those scalawags are so so funny but you know the end of summer also means the end of summer break which means people people that go to school goal for you and i. It's like good news good news yeah. There's teenage brad's won't be driving around during the day anymore. Finally they are so i look and uh-huh only been out of high school for a few years now by look around and i see them. I see these high school and i'm like and i'm like i cannot stand you being on on the road right now. I can't look like children they are they were children. They look like eleven year olds by anyways getting off topic. I think today's episode should be like back to school tips. Okay what i dig that kind of like a back to school school. Oh okay oh. Hey you know what what i think. I've got an episode title idea for that. Oh okay yeah my co workers have been. They've got this cool nickname for me all right here. Yeah i do it. Actually it's it's <hes> mister cool cat snazzy pants. Oh my gosh oh my word. What is what's going on. What's the crap. Who are you missed a coup where philip go and today's episode food is about back to school school <music> <music> when the world what just happened. Where did you put philip. What are you talking about. My favorite. My friend philip in the world is going on here. Don't worry about failed. It'd be bad okay. We got some back to school school. Okay i. I don't don't you're wanting to do tips with me of course okay i. I don't have a list. I kind of have a list. Okay you listen. You brought it already proof daniel okay i will learn. I'll sit back and i learned today day than i would under one condition though after you say how many do you have ten ten tips to dan ten okay after you say your ten tips you bring my brother-in-law back philip. Okay okay okay. Okay okay okay. Let's let's just divert in bonds or later does. Is it cummerbunds or lederhosen. What does that just just just that. It's just a fact no no no way. Can you wear both at one time. I suppose you okay yes. Why what is that hell so they're so cool. Oh come on come on. It's like the like that sash thing that goes around your abdomen okay and then leader hosing are like it's like german over yeah. Okay okay so just as you're going back to school. Just where we are are one or both of these things and people just just like you. Okay yes all right. Yes okay okay all right yeah number nine with all disagree with authority figures. How is that i'd say okay me three okay all right. Do you have like a first name or my name is okay all right. Can i call you now. Okay all right mr cool catch as pants. I need that homework done by tomorrow aro morning. Oh oh wait now. Oh <hes> disregarded all day. Well mr mr cool cat schnauzer pants if you do that. I'm gonna fail you. Are you wink. Wink think yes <hes> if you if you keep we cannot mu. I'm gonna send you down to the principal's office. What what was the but you lost losing losing disregard all day okay all right. I don't know i don't know about that one but <hes> you're the oh you're the one that brought the list so i guess we'll just go with it will okay what's like yoga in this list. I guess so okay. Let's what what's next number eight move like no word and day. It's like there's no now dumb. Move those hips like no other. Is that what you said. That's dance like there's no tomorrow. I think you're catching all okay. I i like that is is it the stance that you've been doing most of the time you've been here host of. I guess you've been doing the entire time. I've never stopped. Okay <hes> so i. I don't know if it's okay with you kind kind of take a video of union this and no no oh no. I can't take video visible to the camera okay so no. I won't show up on my video. No okay als this okay so what we're gonna do then is. We're gonna take a video of me. Replicating that dance and we'll put it out on the patriot t replicate this dates yeah <hes> that way if you pay our our patriot if you donate money you can see mr cooper snazzy pants <hes> back to school dance that will make you cool. I guess very very very very cool. Okay very very very very very cool. Okay all right. I do like the dance you can. You can sit down. There's a chair right there now. Oh okay all right. Just keep doing the dance. I guess now but seven number seven back close specifically typically from the year nineteen eighty two okay now eighty-one okay not anti-nato three night that teenager foale matt nineteen eighty-seven not nat nat from nineteen ninety ninety okay yeah lutely agree with that so so basically kind of distress mc fly show okay puffy vest. I'm good with that g gashes i._q. Shoes yeah okay dow dot skateboard wheels float in the sky. I'm okay <hes>. I don't think that's possible but it's okay. It doesn't have anything to do with our tire so just like just like murga mc fly. Okay okay okay all right okay. Yes sir all right all right. That's catcher now number six ignore. Oh your previous friends from years past. I'm i certainly see a trend here that every other one of your advice is bad. I know it's not i don't get how is a good thing you get. You've you've worked hard to make these friends right. Talk me okay well. It's so easy to be well mister. We're friends. Hey shut up. Why asked mr cooper sometimes. Sometimes people have to work really hard to make friends so why would they just throw them away. There's no need to have oh old friends when you need new friends but you wouldn't need new friends. If you just keep your you get rid of the old news friends and and you get new news friends i don't. I don't see the logic. This cool cat school for one. You need to get new news rents. Ed's okay all right whenever you don't understand. I don't understand this. Don't will want to dwell on it but okay so we can just move past it. You know what's real. What's real cool. Pay pan pay- paying up for patriarch. Oh come on awesome guys here. Okay yeah <music>. I'm glad that you like patriot. <hes> ca-catch pants was go. What is cool was goo. What getting kahad this news yeah. We offer had the season offer behind the scenes. Yeah deleted needed audio from our episodes. Yeah what else we do yeah. We offer a mug home. What's real cool. Friendship friendship is well cheap. <music> reds are not cool new friends. I don't think he'd get it. Okay <music> paying a hundred dollars. Just just pay one hundred. That's my favorite britt tier that we have is. I'm rich tear. Oh we've finally agree very clever. It's good. It's cool any real nice. Oh oh my gosh okay change. Change my name i are you have not thought about that. I i like my name. Yeah daniel you do know what was your given name before. You took on the name. Mr kukoc never had another oh another name. I've never had an okay. What would you okay. What would you consider a good name for me to change your mind to mr. Dan snow'll module really mr dance snow module e no no no no no no no no now dan dan snow snow snow snow stahl stole small small jam kam jam full full li li okay. Why is it's cool. Okay ever heard anybody else. They visited dance no jam so you're you're just everyone everyone just changed their name to mr and then a four word sentence afterwards but that gently okay but they go. I have no no more words number. Okay well yeah number. Four how famous friends have famous friends okay funny. You mentioned that <hes> fill up the man that you disintegrated or teleported way what we did to him is a secret. He's <hes> he's he's actually related to rob lowe so rob lowe. Yeah you think rob lowe is famous. He is famous who's on the west wing parks and rec accused. Hardly fabius competitive math famous rennes will who's your famous friends loopy cover worse of course pekao teleport me awake philip which is b. two peas in the pod <music> here on all goldberg and my best read and i have a all right here. Oh yeah okay. Let's wrap up <music>. Oh i don't know mr cooke has shown. It'll be back up. She didn't pick up because such good friends with number three all right. How do you make friends with these famous. People okay okay number three. What is it w someone else okay all right. What what what what just is on okay you try. Try to be someone else. So you change your your name your parents now what your personality of course how why what good does that do cooler than seeing someone. That's cool and just being okay. That didn't make any logical or says all right look. I think it is not getting you know. It's not cool you. We just not getting it to be uneducated. Oh let me paint you a picture about this works all right imagine daniel daniel daniel he's he's. He's a cool cat at school. He's out of the tap of the stays gay and you say what's this fools weakness a- and you realize is the knee the knee alright eight so what you go for the knees not right then okay. You wait a moment okay cool cats. Oh okay patients. They wait for the best in you. Wake cord cooper's the beat in holly. Grab them all right any you say sticky knees. You say you do all right and they know then not them no longer. They know that you mean business at that point. That's right okay and guess what what you're not boring all day. No more okay you wa stickiness l. No mr stickiness no oh mr excellent now okay mr dan snow jam fully ari how amaze does not be. I don't know i don't know about that one. I don't know about most of what you've said. It doesn't make much sense to me at all what has made sense <hes> the dancing okay <hes> catching oh nine hundred eighty two clothing catching. Oh nothing more well amd patriot what catching on let's give daniel a round of applause. Oh oh okay all right that that feels pretty good s. pretty cool. Isn't it yeah coming from leased. Okay clap when someone does something good. Oh okay so just give wreckage clap. Okay guess what what i can make anybody oh by white it just telling them to or do you want to try not really sad oh. What do do you want to know. I don't know dan. You are the lights dimming in the room. Yeah sure okay okay. Oh what the heck. What are you doing the meat. Oh jeez that feel really weird. I didn't like it too bad that was there was number two number cool as forgetting your lists now what what what muslim why mr khoo cash is. Your pants makes noises to get people's attention. You have not even making that noise oldest. I was was yuppie hours planting z. Okay that see jeff core oy avoi- goal of coolness. Yes okay so what does that do. How does that help. When you're going back at school. Have you thought about anything but the known that that has been on the top think about okay correct about this call hash brothers hash this again so he is and then it gets people's attention. You can't oh my okay so i have to make up my own then yeah well. Did you like that. Ah loved it okay and it just gets people's. Attention makes can't stop thinking about you okay. They're kind of like on edge a little bit of mystery. It's intriguing. I look at you and they say was doing okay and then doing little to do eight yeah. They wake up in the middle of that can't stop thinking about okay. <hes> you what i'm thinking no. I want you to get out of here in philip come back so you promised i <hes> some is get rid of you. Yes say his name philip now is full name filibuster mao his full name philip joseph ostro were now no no no white middle initial philip j australia now why just telling me what to say mr mr after say mr at the beginning getting alcoa's okay well mr koch schnauzer pants. Thank you for being here. I guess i'm kind of tired of being in anyway and thank you for the advice mr phil jay phillips. Oh you're back. I'm back yeah jesus joe. Oh okay <hes> yeah. Something just really strange changes happened like they can just be sitting here this whole time. I can't believe it. I don't what are you talking about. Let's <hes> let's go into the other other room and let's listen back to this entire episode what's going on. What do you mean the episode that i just recorded with a different guy so <hes> right after you said nickname from work <hes> big old lightning bolt came down for data got ta like is a._m. And then a new guy human the the.