2004: Marcia Martin: The Art of Powerful Communication

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Welcome to the conscious millionaire. Show episode number two thousand four. Hello i am marcia martin and on today show. I'm here to reveal the secrets of the art of powerful communication to conscious millionaire. The number one show for conscious entrepreneurs and ceos on a mission to build a highly profitable business that makes a positive impact on egypt's discover how to make bigger money create a bigger impact and live a bigger live. You're listening to the conscious. Munir network her by over twelve million listeners. In one hundred ninety countries now joined your host javy chrome the third. The conscious meaner mentor. Master nlp coach speaker and author of the number one international bestseller conscious millionaire. Grow your business by making a difference this. Jv and if you're a business owner coach who's currently making twenty thousand dollars or more per month than this announcement is for you. But first congratulations but isn't now the time to make an additional two hundred and fifty thousand dollars or more in the next twelve months while to do that. You must make specific changes in how you think about your business see possibilities and the level at which you play. Let's discuss your goals and how you can reach them much faster schedule. A complimentary time to talk with me go to conscious millionaire dot com forward slash. Talk with javy. That's right claim your time right now at conscious millionaire dot com ford slash talk with. Jv hi this is jamie and i am so excited to join me because we have an incredible show today but as you know. This isn't just a podcast in syndicated radio. Show it's an entrepreneur training. Just for you and i have. An incredible guest helped me welcome are featured guest. She is renowned global speaker. Executive coach and ceo of marcham martin productions and executive training firm that consult fortune one thousand companies and leadership and championship performance. She's trained over three hundred thousand people worldwide and her corporate clients include hard rock header national warner brothers and intercontinental hotels. My guest today is the marcia martin. Marsha welcome to the show. Oh thank you. I'm so pleased to be here. It's so much fun being with you. Thank you for having me on your show. We'll right now you're in boca boca raton florida Part of my old stomping grounds. And what a wonderful beautiful part of florida. I mean it's gorgeous in boca. I love book. I'm here because as you said i work with. I consult an train. The senior executives at hard rock hotels in this is where their corporate bases is in fort. Lauderdale florida. so i'm here working with them all over the world. They send me to all their hotels all around the globe. Well i wanna give a shoutout to aspen aspen a couple of months ago and i have to say folks you know how i feel. We ought to be wearing our mask. And social distancing and downtown ask been is very safe because they have a sign on every block and nobody is around without masks. Everybody social distancing and of course aspen. Because you've lived. There is such a fun place. My real home. I lived in aspen. Snowmass village for over twenty five years and i love the community there and folks. You may not know this. Because you're probably thinking. Oh it's beverly hills and yes beverly hills has some mansions in it but the most city in the united states his aspen colorado where you can spend ten million dollars for small home. That's actually true. You look at the half million dollar home. Isn't it no. It's an aspirin. It's ten million in. Aspirin doesn't look out the window and see the mountains and trees and the beautiful blue sky and breathe fresh air and so there is something to it there is it is beautiful. Place in snowmass is fantastic into several conferences in snowmass. For a reason because it. But today your reason for showing up as you're here to take another step forward and we're here to help you because we're gonna be talking about the art of powerful communication marsha. let's start with defining what is the distinction between powerful communication. And what most people are doing all day long. Well most people do is they have ears that are listening to words and they have mouths that our chattering and saying information and there's no connection. There's no what. I call a duplication of another person's experience. Most people aren't home aren't president and most people really do not know how to listen. You know i think one of the hallmarks. 'cause you don't have all this training and in all p you've got training ask. Is that the difference. Between and i'll tell you folks you know i've done two thousand five hundred episodes. I actually don't sit here thinking about what i'm gonna say next or wondering what the question is i'm listening to my guest and then all of a sudden boom. Oh there's the golden nugget. But i'm not chattering about it. I think unpowered communication both people are constantly chattering. That's one characteristic about what they're going to say next. I agree you know. There are laws of communication. Just like there's laws like gravity and most of us have learned the laws of gravity. We don't go up to the tenth floor and say screw gravity. I'm taking the tenth floor window out today instead of having to you know. Go down to the first floor. We organize ourselves around gravity. We don't fight with gravity anymore because we know we'll win but there are the same kinds of unreasonable laws in communication. And if you don't know them you can't follow them and if you don't follow them you are not affective and powerful in life and so communication release. The foundation of you're having successful relationships. It's the foundation of your creating commitments and enrolling or persuading other people to be involved in your commitments. So it's really the core of your whole success in your live and most people don't know what that even means. They know how to take care of their car better than they know how to take care of the human body in their ability to communicate so before we delve into the loss of communication. I'm curious why would an entrepreneur or a coach or a business leader. Who might be listening. And i mean you i mean you specifically. You're listening today. Why would someone want to learn to be a powerful communicator. How's it going to help their business. How's it going to help them as a entrepreneur coach when you learn the laws of communication and you learn how to communicate. You actually can create the circumstances. Most people live in a world where circumstances determine what. They're committed the too if you ask a person whether committed to her if they will commit they'll probably tell you well. Is there enough money. Is there the right team Do i have enough time. They looked to the circumstances to see if the circumstances are set up and then they will commit what powerful communicators no as you commit. I and with understanding how communication works you can cause and create the circumstances. You need to produce the results that you want. So what happens when you really understand how to powerfully communicate. You become a champion. Lots of people can improve. you know. there's three games in life. You've been lose. You can get from the back of the pack to the front of the pack or you can really be a champion. It's kind of like a horse race. They all start at the same place but in the end they all end up in those three positions. There's a couple of horses in the back. I can tell you the the laws of how you lose a game. I'm not going to because who wants to learn that to be really at it. Most of people play improvement. Which is all the horses in the pack and that game is. How do i get from the back to the front of the pack in other words. How do i get a little better than i was last year. How do i do it a little more this time than i did it last time. So that i produce a little better result and that's an important game. We all need to know that game but it's not the great game. The great game is the game secretary at played and all the other great horses that we're the one or two courses out in front. It's a total different game. And that's called breakthrough or championship performance. And you can't win that game or play that game if you don't understand mutation so let's delve down into powerful communication. What are the laws of communication marsha. Okay there are many and some of them are subtle. But i wanna talk about two really big basic powerhouse laws and if you just start here you're going to produce better results than you would. If you didn't the first one is presence you need to be present and centered open present In in in terms of to be able to start to communicate. You can't be in your head. You can't be thinking about what you're going to say. You can't be regretting the past. You can't be worried about the future. You can't be putting together debating what you're going to respond where it's you can't be thinking about something that you did last week or in the last meeting. You have to be here now and you'd be surprised. How many human beings do not have the discipline to actually be here now. Most human beings operate as if it's the responsibility of the environment or the other person to get them to be here. I'm here go ahead. What a really love about this. Marcia and i know you don't know this but in chapter seven of my book on millionaire zone i have all. My proprietary work spent years creating on how to get into flow anytime any place at will and the first key which is the most important key is to be present. Yes and i'm thinking yet but that also relates to what we're discussing which is the flow of communication because communications flow powerful communication. We're flowing back and forth with one another. Yes it's a dance. Yup and you have to be present or you might get stepped on your toes or you step on the other person's toes and don't happen the way that they could but boy when you are great present dancer. It's miracles you've trained over three hundred thousand people worldwide like you say people in companies like hard rock cafe which is such. I've gone too hard rock cafes all over the world. I've little pens from bangkok and all of that. But what is the step someone needs to go through. In order to learn to be present great and i work with hard rock. Hotels co tells not the cafes. We're Three prong division with casinos cafes and hotels and Hotels are i expert cheese so the steps are this first of all you need to get present and there's three steps one is get centered or present. Second step is listen. Third step is speak. Most people do it in the exact opposite order. First of all they're never present or centered. They start talking. I and they rarely get to the step of listening so to be present. What that means is you're actually in this moment and that takes some discipline of good Way to educate yourself and get better at being. President is to meditate a bit. Because you clear out your mind and also it's to take responsibility for your own attention span so your own ability to cause yourself to draw yourself into being present and interested. Most of us give that responsibility away to the listener. We say well. You know if you're interesting that i'll be here. Well if i agree with you then i might come out and say hello you know otherwise. I'm outta here. And i'm not interested. Well it's not up to the universe to get your attention. You are the chooser and you decide whether you're going to be president or not and then it's like anything else you have to practice. Nobody learned how to play bach. Or beethoven or mozart on the piano when they started up. They learned how to play chopsticks and they practiced practiced so one should practice. Look in the mirror for example for ten seconds and actually see yourself in the mirror and every time you have a thought in your head say. Wait a minute stop. That thought get back here in present time. See if you can do it for ten seconds and see if you can do it for a minute and see if you can do it for five minutes look at someone else and do the same thing but practice some discipline to cause yourself to be here now. Notice when you're not here and get yourself back. This reminds me when i went and lifted a buddhist monastery had a. I had a meditation instructor. And that i am proud to say folks. I like to keep saying this. Because i know you might be listening in. You're still in the perfectionist. Lovell that perceptiveness perceptionist chapter. Let's say and and no one. Gram i no longer. Try to be perfect But when i got to the buddhist monastery my only go with become the perfect meditators right. Because i had i had to get the a plus right. That's that was my mode of operation. And the first thing with my meditation instructor they told me meditation is the practice not perfection practice of being a what a relief and it was. It was twelve hours a day. Meditating and it's just the thought would come in. I'd label it as a thought and i come back to the breath going in and out and i'd spend the whole day doing that and you know why people don't want to practice because practice means actually that you're a beginner. You're not an expert. You're a beginner and you need to practice to get to the place where you're able competent expert at something and beginners have to be willing to be wrong. Looked stupid and not know and the three things that human beings are thrown to and want more than anything in the world this to be right to know the answer so goes against what were automatically thrown towards and we have to really tell ourselves. I need to be a good beginner so i teach my students every time you make mistake. Pat yourself on the back. Tell yourself congratulations because you just wear a championship. Beginner congratulations gina steak. Fantastic you got the award today. I mean that's what you have to practice. And when you're practicing means that you don't know how they do it when you don't know how to the major beginner so stop being a pretender because a pretender will never get to be an expert. You'll get to be an expert if you're willing to be wrong. Look stupid and not know. We're marcia break. I know you have a second law communication and it's very important one so you know. Open your ears even wider because this is really critical. What's that second. Law of communication marsha. The second law is you must have space in which to put something in everything needs space in which to exist. So if you're communicating there must be space in which you can communicate and the way that you create space and someone else is to listen but a certain kind of listening not just with your ears you have to be present and the listen to create space and then i can teach you how the see if that person has space and then you can put something into the space. Which is what you might want to say. Well you know a a complete but very related is i teach people the the process of sales having a sales conversation right. And you know like you some of my higher level. Vip private trainings not not inexpensive and the most important thing to do after you tell them that price is to shut up. He was speaks first loses the sale. And just let them digest and let them respond us. And if you've got job the price isn't gonna even matter but it is still better to just let it digest. And would i describe that as your emptying someone out of their concerns. Their considerations their rationality their whatever they need to share. And it's like if. I had two glasses of water and they were filled up to the top. And i said to you i'm gonna take this of water and i'm gonna pour it into this other one. You would tell me no no. You can't do that because this one's full well. It's the same way with a person. They're filled up. Everyone is so filled up. They need to empty out first before they have any room for you to put in what you wanna put in. So the real core competency of communication is. How do you empty someone out. How do you be present. And receive and allow them to share in such a way that they give you their particular concern or their thought or their reason or their excuse. Most people what they will do when somebody gives you their concern. Is you wanna bad. It back to them. You want to say oh no. You shouldn't be concerned about that. Oh no that's not what it is you need to understand and we keep batting at back rather than just receiving it and emptying them out and it takes some time to empty out people because they are really full. Well as as i'm thinking through what you're saying show what was coming up for me was in that emptying process and the space process is it's also giving people an opportunity to finally feel what they're feeling because most people spend most of their time running away from their feelings because the feelings feel on a scary right but creating the space of someone can actually feel I think it's a great honor that you're creating for them because now they could become more fully human as well absolutely and how i would share that in my particular Communications language is. I would say that you're allowing someone to get in touch with their experience so everybody has automatic answers. You know i can give you a thousand reasons. That i don't even need to think about and i don't need to Go inside because usually when i give an automatic answer you start defending that position that you have and you send it back to me and we go back and forth about that particular automatic cancer. But if you don't defend if you just receive and allow me to have my experience and you empty me out and you get it and you listen. I don't have it anymore and pretty soon. I run out of automatic answers. And the only way i can really decide what to say next is to look inside at my own real sin seer offense experience which is what you're calling feelings and then you have the beginnings of an authentic conversation which is really fun and folks. I hope that we now have the beginnings of an authentic conversation together. Because you're here to grow to take another step to move forward and building your business and making your powerful difference in the world and we're going to be right back so stay tuned. We'll be back with marcia. Martin hi this is j if you're a business. Owner coach is currently making twenty thousand dollars or more per month than this announcement is for you. I congratulations you're already in the top ten percent of all entrepreneurs but isn't now the time for you to make an additional two hundred and fifty thousand dollars or more in the next twelve months so you get on the fast track to becoming conscious millionaire now you probably know that the same thinking strategies and actions that got you where you are right now won't double your business in the next twelve months to do that. You must make specific changes in how you think about your business. Cpap the level at which you play. I know that. Because i've been there. And i coach people just like you to grow their businesses rapidly. Let's discuss your goals and how you can reach them much faster schedule. A complimentary time to talk to be. Just go to conscious millionaire dot com ford slash talk with. Jv again claim your time now at conscious millionaire dot com forward slash. Talk with jv. Welcome back on. Jv krumlov third host of the conscious millionaire show. And i'm here with our featured guest. Marcia martin marsha it's time for the twenty four hour challenge. Could you give the conscious millionaire challenge to everyone listening today. Yes i'm going to challenge you to find someone in your life that you have a broken relationship with and be willing and committed to mending at completing ed or making it better and how should someone do that so they right someone an email. Should they talk to them. This is best done if you talked to them. Not if you ride them so find someone that's in an and you don't have to find the worst person in your life that you have the biggest breakdown with just start like i said you're a beginner like we're we're practicing right. So let's say you have someone that you don't talk to anymore That you've lost a little love and affinity for and start to realize that how you've listened to them in the past is by pretending something that wasn't really true like a lot of times. We pretend that we really enjoy being with that person. And we really don't or we pretend that we're going to listen to them and get some kind of wisdom from them but you know what we're saying is this person doesn't know what they're talking about now. The first step of repairing the relationship is to acknowledge that you've been pretending to really take responsibility for the fact that i haven't been an authentic listener in our communication and i've been pretending to be and i want you to know i haven't been and i've been pretending just to say that and then it's To say that what it's cost you that you realize that way of relating has cost you something in your relationship with them and then the third step of this person you're gonna talk to is to say that you have realized there is new possibilities for yourself and that you would create a a new possibility and just those three simple little. Communications can open up a bigger conversation. Where you can begin to see what needs to be shared or listen to an order. Repair the relationship even if it's to say. I'm thankful that we had this chance. I'm not interested in really going forward in a close relationship. But i feel good now about the completion that we have. Well i love this and folks. There's the three steps but if you're driving jogging pushing the baby carriage. Whatever you're doing and you can't write all this down. Don't worry you know the home base for you always is conscious millionaire. Show dot com to scroll down when you go to conscious millionaire show dot com to the title of today's show the art of powerful communications. Click on that. It'll take you to the show notes and we're gonna have all of this information that twenty four our challenge. All the answers to the questions were about to ask in the conscious millionaire world class experts section and all of it will be right there including all the links for how you can connect with marcia martin. I want to take this moment to thank you personally. Thank you for showing up. Thank you for showing up for yourself. And especially when i thank all our fans and friends and london england and toronto canada. Thank you so much for being loyal fans of the conscious millionaire show and now it's time for the conscious world class expert questions. First one mindset. Marsha what is the mindset that you've developed it helps you discover your best business opportunities. I say the mindset. That i have as i am responsible. I am the chooser and that. The world has enormous and abundant possibilities. I love that. I share that with you know and i share it with you as well listening today. There are no limit literally to the opportunities that are coming to you. It's your job to know which ones fit for you and then to just say yes. That's your job strategy. What's the strategy you could share. That would help any entrepreneur coach or business. Owner put more money in the bank. I think a strategy would be to discover what it is. You want to contribute rather than to think about what you wanna have or get but really look to see what is your wanting. What is your yearning. What is your calling to make a difference. How would you like this world to be better. And what can you do to do that. What is your special gift of giving. If you put your energy into looking to see how you can serve. The rest will happen. Automatically the universe wants to support those of us and make all of us abundant if we are providing sustainability and contribution to itself its abundance out in abundance back but it does start with the impact in that same vein. What is your understanding of your own life purpose for being here. And how if you brought that into your business as a vision for the work that you do. Well i've always said my life's work is having your life work better and that spend my work since i was seventeen. I've been a conscious transformational teacher and trainer. Since i was twenty and I've been leading seminars and training corporations and leadership but the real work that i do whether i talk about communication or leadership or how to build a business or how to make money or how all of those things is. I teach people. And my life's work is about how you access and harness the internal power that you have as being that you are magnificently able and magical and can cause any kind of result that you want. If you're in touch with that internal power that you have most of us go outside of ourselves to find our agreement. What we need to do is to go inside of ourselves to find our wisdom. What is a book that you'd recommend or i think you have a couple of books. You'd like to recommend to entrepreneurs that are listening. Today i think one of the greatest of all time it's simple and yet profound is the four agreements by don miguel ruiz. It is extraordinary in terms of how you build yourself as a more effective human being how you can make more money how you can have more friends and how you can deepen your spiritual knowledge of yourself. So i love that book and then there's a very little Known book that is really powerful book. As far as i'm concerned which is the last word on power by tracy gos- if you can find that book it's worth three and we'll have both of those listed on the show notes at conscious millionaire show dot com. You know you're probably listening. And i know a lot of you're saying this marsh show woman is really smart and wise and she is and you might want to reach out to her marsha. What's the best way for people to connect with you. Go to my si-. Marcia martin dot com and it's m. a. r. c. i a. Martini dot com. And then i have a special membership club which people can join for ten dollars a month and view like on net flicks. It's a marcia. Martin net flicks of my workshops and podcasts and seminars and so it has a wealth of wisdom. And if you go to. Marcia martin club dot com. You can find out all about it there. So marcia martin dot com and marcia martin club dot com. We're going to have both of those again on the show notes as well as all the social media ways that you can follow marcia martin. I'm curious and folks. I never asked this question in advance. Because i want to be as surprised as you are. What's that next summit. You wanna reach marsha and what might be a challenge obstacle. You're going to have to overcome to get there well. I have a different viewpoint on life. Right now than i've ever had because i'm really in the last quarter of my life and so my work now is to turn. My workover is to somehow get it out the wisdom that i've learned so that other people can use it. I wanna give it away to the children to the teenagers to the young adults to the young people that are coming behind me so that they can make this a better world and the way that i'm doing that right now and is my foundation of that is the programs. I'm starting in my club. This club is not only going to be a club where you can access digital content and get wisdom watch. Seminars have fun marcia. Martin club dot com. But i'm going to set it up and we're working on webinars podcasts. Content blogging Interviews asking questions. And i'm throwing my whole heart into that particular conscience. I love that project. Marsha and we're a fan of yours and i know that if you're listening. You're probably already a fan of marcia martin as well our final question. It's our signature question. I've asked a couple of thousand times. What's the legacy you want to leave. Marcia martin i feel legacy is something that is your life. A lot of my friends. Legacy is something that they look at now and they say what do i want my legacy to be. I look at it in terms of. It's what i have already. And i'm really proud of my legacy. I've given my life my whole life to make a difference. I've trained hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people. I have people calling me. Even now that i trained when they were nineteen years old and they're now sixty five and they reached out to me and say i've found you. I'm so glad i wanted to tell you. Thank you thank you for my wife. Thank you for my children. Thank you for my work. Thank you for my emotions. Thank you for that to me is so fulfilling and i want to be able to say i did my best to make this a better world. That would be my legacy. I love that legacy. And i have no doubt that you are and i want to thank you again for showing up for listening to the conscious millionaire's show if this was inspiring to you. Please tell some of your friends because my life is about making a big impact with you. I love the fact that you listen to the show and it means a great deal to me. I know that you showed up however not for me. You showed up for yourself. And that's a good thing because it's time for you to take another step forward. I look forward to connecting with you on the next conscious millionaire and marcia thank you so much for being are featured guest today. Thank you and god bless next. Listening to concerts. Million immediate podcasts radio network host producer and owner of the show distributors and broadcast media. Make no claims that the tragedies and information cousin show results in province and may result in losses the opinions in advice from hosts guests who ripped those are the owner staff management or broadcasters of the show now accounting or financial or health advice has made. Show your advice to seek counsel naturally to your business financial investments or other legal matters from license advisors always going to tell you a physician at license adviser prior to making any changes in your diet exercise program planning any health strategies or information discussed on the shows now information provided may be suitable for your situation as always take full responsibility for decisions and actions you take including responses that they create in your health.

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