Monday Morning Podcast 3-11-19


Hey, what's going on its Bill Byrne? It's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday. She'll eleventh two thousand and nineteen what's going on. How I. Oh, how you doing? I'm gonna great move. Despite the fact that I missed that fucking the first Moto GP race of the of the year, I found out directtv isn't doesn't have it on fucking television anymore out here, which was very disappointing to me, you know, I couldn't find it. I was scampering. I woke up in a sweat go. Wait a minute. Wait does f one start today? I thought today. Gonna miss it. Right. Freaking out OCD fucking twenty God damn racists. God forbid, you miss one. So I look up f one that doesn't start till next week down in Australia. Okay. I already have that recorded that's easy because that got picked up by ESPN. So I'm like all right where the Foxton motor GP. I have direct TV. All right. I'm not trying to talk down to all you people. That's right. I can still afford to pay for cable. That's how fucking hard. I am crushing. Out here in these streets. How you fucking cord cutters? Just back and yourself into a fucking entertainment corner. Just sitting there with your apps, and you little Netflix fuck and subscription. That's your world. What are you gonna do watch every episode narcos and then some stupid documentary to try impress your friends? You what you you need you need those seven hundred fucking channels that they have three hundred of which are radio stations. What do you walk away from Molyneux's? What are you afraid of? They're all proud of it too. Because when I couldn't find it on direct TV I went onto the Twitter and very nicely. Dare. I say eloquently, I just put out to the Twitter sphere. I said, hey, does anybody know what channel the Moto GPA is on on on directtv? And. Oh, did that come out of the woodwork? Jesus christ. You would've thought I put a fucking piece of cheese down in a bun all the fucking Rach came running out. Right. The rats even eat cheese. Don't they kind of eat anything? You don't me? Like if you just put like a severed finger in a mouse trap wouldn't fuck and Radha virtually come up and try and eat the fucking thing. I mean, they don't give a shit, right? Like that relative that always shows up to the event never brings anything and just hovers, right? Hovers around the fucking table doesn't use that fucking spoon. To scoop as is reach it in with his fuck and Mets. That's what rats. That's a rat and social circle anyways. Plowing ahead. So I put it out there nicely. Okay. I like to feel like, you know, being a man in my fifties. Now that I am I am refined. I am a man of the world, right? I drive a four door sedan. I still pay for cable. Okay. So I'm like this close to buy a pair of loafers. Do you understand stay like that? That is like how a stab wished. I am as an adult. So I put it out there nicely. Does anybody know what channel the Moto GP races on? On direct TV all these fucking cuts come out of the woodwork. First of all, you know journal sixty nine it got it. Are you going to try that? Right. Then they start doing this what burst and they start speaking Twitter speak. I didn't know that direct TV was still a thing. Oh, wow. Man. You like so cool the way you the way you get your entertainment. Jesus christ. You wouldn't do it? If thought I showed up with a fucking. I don't know the wrong pair sneakers on what was in fifth grade. The fact that actually suggests that I had no idea there was so much. Shame and still haven't directtv. I pay like two hundred bucks a month for cable. Swear to God. What do you think? I went from one fuck in podcast link the two I gotta pay for my direct TV. I do you know somebody told me one time he goes to pay way too much money. Just can't become over there. Now yell at him. I'll cut it in half. Because all these fucking people accord, cutting and shit. You can you know, I have all sports packages. Oh, yeah. I'm talking shit here people. Okay. I pay for direct TV I have all four sports packages. All right. And I missed most the games. Okay. You wanna talk about taking hundreds of just throwing them into a fire a lightness Garth. That's how Roland. Anyway. So it turns out that direct TV no longer. Carries motor GP, which in my world is the best fucking racing out there as far as if you wanna see excitement if you want passing. Okay, you fucking NASCAR guys down there with your fuck and stale that also doubles as a smoker during the tailgate you wanna get drunk. You stay on this side. If you want some buffalo, but you get on Exide, right? You guys wanna see fucking excitement you wanna see passing and that type of shit. You wanna see you want to see a wreck watch a fucking guy high side on a motorcycle going like fucking two hundred miles an hour. Like once every three racist. This just something that would make evil knievel be like Jesus fucking crowds that guy still alive. Which point you said, it's called an airbag evil. You know, they watched you a little jump there at at fuck could savers who am I e evil can even would laugh at that bullshit. The little light bikes in their fucking airbags. You know? You know? He went out there wearing a fucking payroll leather under ruse and gun on a fucking chopper. You could fuck it by down at the local store. Can bike wait more than my goddamn head. Anyway. You want to watch this motor GP so fucking ended up going online. Everybody's like why don't you watch it on read it for free, whatever. So I didn't I go to Mojo GP their website. I sign up for the season hundred and thirty nine bucks. Right. More money more money. Just fucking is flying the window. Right. So. I signed up for it. And then I'm such an old guy. I couldn't figure out where to watch it. And I finally figured it out after the race was over. You've gotta click on this like four lines on the side. And one of them says live when you click on that that's the fucking race. By the time. I figured that out. You know, it's countdown like fucking, you know, nine thousand hours until the next goddamn race. So I missed it. And like all MotoGP races. That sound like it was exciting as hell and it came right down to the end and to video. So Ma has like he did last year by like the length of his bike. And I don't know. I'm hoping if anybody watches it on motor GP site, if they replay it I can't even find a fucking highlight of it. But anyways, so all you read next down there like you stock car racing. Just it's twenty-something laps. It'll go by in two seconds. And I know it's a bunch of owners out there on their little motive scooters. I ain't nobody named kale or hairy. Or dale. You know, there's a Mark that's kind of you know, Andres Davinci. Oh, so hor, hey, Lorenzo, close the fuck and border. I'd like to build a wall around that fucking racetracks with God like to do jump over that mother fucker. Anyways. I might seem a little like my energy is a little higher little more giddy. It's because. I doing shit. I got a special in the can man and. I'm just I haven't done stand up since I said good night on the second show. And tonight, I'm actually going down to the to the comedy store there. It's close to the public. It's just for comics only, and it's the memorial for Brody Stevens, which I think is going to be. I think it's going to be great. It's going to be sad. But I really think it's like he's such an uplifting guy. And there was so much to learn from him that I really looking forward to going down there and celebrating that guy's life and the work that he that he did down at the comedy store one of the legends one of the legends. There's a place out front where they put all the all the names of the people that really built that place and kept it going. I hope they move his name up there. That's what I'm going to suggest. So anyway. All I did. I. Took my daughter down to the park. You know, we went on the fucking all the rides and all that stuff just said like the best time hanging out with her and. We've said we'd watched the Bruins. We watch the Celtics while I watch the Bruins. I watched three Bruins games as fucking weekend. The Panthers Ottawa which both ended great. And then Pittsburgh. I had a feeling they were going to get us. I mean, we literally one like eighteen or nineteen in a row undefeated. We were like we like fifteen and four I think so at some point someone who's going to have to stop us. The penguins always play as tough as much as it sucked that the streak ended. It was our longest point streak since I guess the early forties. But. I got a tight some Sidney Crosby pass in the second period. That anybody see that cheese is Christ. I mean, that's one of those things you watch. It's just like what what do we need robots for like, that's like the kind of thing like a robot skating that fast trying to get around defense. And then he has another guy streaking down on the outside of another. Defenseman. And then you got the goalie who could poke check the pass away. He put it the only place where it could fuck and be like Todd Ray fuck it pass to the clerk of the Enzo. Right on the tape Bank bag in the back of the fucking. It was just one of those. It's one of those things even though the other team did it you can't even get mad. You just like Jay's Christ that was fucking. It was a thing of beauty. So I don't have another fucking gig other than one quick benefit New York that I'm doing on April. Second garden of dreams. MSG in the theater where Eddie Murphy did raw. I always think about that. When I when I go down and do the show that that that this is where he did that special and I saw him on that tour. What used to be called great woods Mansfield, Massachusetts with the weather girls opening up. I for the life of me cannot find any record of that date when it happened. I think I finally found it when you when are you fucking millennial nerds find that? All right. It was like eighty five or nineteen eighty six great would suggest opened Mansfield Massachusetts. And that summer I saw I saw Rodney Dangerfield and this was post back to school. He was that movie hit and he was on this huge tour. And then I saw him in that a couple of weeks later. I saw Eddie Murphy. And I remember that that really was something that stuck with me. I was like eighteen years old. And. I remember when I went to see dangerfield's watching him and just looking around the crowd. And it didn't dawn on me. That was an all white crowd. Because I, you know, I'm white just like this is what the world looks like to me at that point my life. You know, living in the suburbs of Boston Massachusetts was just a bunch of white people. So it didn't really dawned on me that was an all white crowd. I remember looking around thinking, man. This guy's make everybody laugh. He's killing this mazing. Right. And then a couple of weeks later. I saw Eddie Murphy and the crowd was mixed member that stuck with me. I was like this. But this guy this guy's making everybody laugh. I had launched seats for that. I had seats for Dangerfield. So I actually saw him in. It kills me that I didn't try and pony up some more money back then, but I didn't have any money to not sit in in fucking field. I mean, I didn't really technically see him. I was just watching him on the monitors. But he was wearing that purple. Mariachi suit that he wore. So anyways, fuck of my talking about here. How the hell did I get onto that? I don't know. I watched the Celtics I the Lakers and at the risk of sounding like an old, man. Just I fucking hate NBA hoop now. You know? It's just it's fuck up and down the fuck and cord everybody launching a three there's nobody underneath you know, the other teams on a ten. Oh run. Yeah. Just keep launching threes. There's no feeding the big man down low anymore. Not nobody can stand in the fuck and paint. You know? I don't know. I I don't know what the fuck is going on with the Celtics. I haven't watched too much, but I watched a bunch the last couple years, and I can tell you this. We had fucking Jae Crowder and Kelly Olympic and everybody was fucking listening to Brad Stevens. We were a tougher team to beat. We didn't have the level of talent. But we were tougher team to beat in this whole fucking new era. And you hear the announcers just like, you know, they condone the behavior that people get so good that they don't have to listen to the coach anymore, and I'm not just picking on the Celtics like that's like a round the fuck and league. And I don't know. You know, he's going to have to get his touches fucking touches. They're going out here to win the fucking game. Drives me we have this. Unbelievable chance right now. With the talent talent that we have we should be able to the very least scare the Golden State Warriors. I know we'd beat him the other day in regular, but that doesn't mean shit. It's one game regular season. Like those guys are the fucking champs there in the middle of fucking dynasty. And they're going to have an entirely different energy. When you meet them in the finals. All right as opposed to fuck in one game out of eighty or whatever that you happen to catch him on a fuck and Wednesday night, and you beat them. We have this great opportunity to win another one while the Lakers are fucking rebuilding. And I love everybody's I can panic mode. Like Magic Johnson those guys doing exactly what the fuck. They said they were going to do we brought in LeBron? Okay. This is a two year plan like the fan base is this so fucking impatient. Now, like a two year plan is taken too long. So it's literally you bring in fucking LeBron the first year, and then he's going to attract all of this free agent ALP. And then they're all going to go out there and pylon because everyone wants to be part of the Lakers fucking. Great history, and they wanna fuck models and famous women. You know, that's the fucking thing that they have over the Celtics. They got the weather and they got the pussy. We just can't fuck and compete. You know, you wanna go racist city to racist city where right there, we got you eyeballed eyeball. You want? Go championships. We got two more than they do unless you count that one. That they count. But they have the weather, and they have the pussy and that that right fucking there. You know what? I mean, the fuck you going to do with how do you? How do you beat that? Location location location. How many titles do you think that the fucking? Lakers would have had if they stayed in Minneapolis. Okay. And they had the exact same ownership. I'm asking can they still attract the level of talent that they attracted? Being out there in Hollywood. Now of a sudden you're in the frozen tundra. Of minneapolis. Minnesota right. You got fuck in farm fed chicks wherein their overalls coming in from Duluth, right? You got some hayseeds making the trek in from fucking the Dakotas. I mean, I just don't see it. I just don't I just don't think there's enough pussy, and you don't have the fucking weather. Whether in pussy have have have caused more goddamn athletes to make stupid fucking moves to jump out of the NFL and join the fucking world football league. Well money to money whether in pussy, the trifecta. So I don't know. I'm just hoping people listen to Brad Stevens. Just listen to what the fuck. This guy says play like a God damn team. Fuck your own stats and just go out there and get it done. And let's fuck and win another one before the lake is a comic because the Lakers, a comet they're always coming. Okay. It's almost like a rule. They can only suck for like five fucking years before they're going to re and you know, they're going their whole fucking their whole fucking history is free agents free agents free right down to Kobe Bryant who was a fucking Charlotte one. But what kills me look at that Antonio Brown? Like, yeah. You go into the bills. I'm not playing for them. They get the out of the league. I don't understand the bills just made a move to get one of the top receivers in the league. But he doesn't like where the fuck they are. So he's not gonna fucking go. I mean, I don't know what happened to parody in the fucking league. I'd listen I'm all for like players not getting fucked over by ownership. But they're at the point now where they have too much power. You know, kind of like where the unions were when I was a kid which caused all these fucking corporations would be like, all right? Well, we'll just going to move the corporation out of this fucking country. Go back to sweatshop labor. You know? And I I don't mind you unions. I'm not saying don't ever fucking union. But whose kid in most people don't handle power? Well, right. And they became too Grady to county too much leaning on the mop, and then the fucking rich guys will have a fucking out here. I gotta tell you something. All of what I've just said here. I've I don't think I've ever really read on it just this is all me just pasting together conversations, I've heard throughout my life. Okay. Like, I've said before if you want. Clear and accurate information. You listen to the Joe Rogan podcast, by the way. I have to give that guy of a shoutout, right? As far as like what that guy has done with his have you been looking at the fucking guests. That guy's getting. He's like. Elon Musk and the Dr Phil and the David Lee Roth, and then like some scientists that ever even heard of who then blows my mind about like some sort of like, I don't know, I know some scientific shit. I don't fucking too stupid understand it. But like that guy is. Like, I don't know. I don't know what school where this podcasting world goes. But like at this point. If you do if you're a guest on his show, you get more heat than if you do like a fucking legendary talk show. It's it's unbelievable. What that guy is has done. I was just thinking the other day. I put the fuck guest that I see I think a David Lee Roth. I think it was just the the variety of guests. They again, Dr Phil that's fucking huge. I mean that is like a big mainstream old school guests. I'm going to go do the talk show circuit. I'm gonna fucking go do terrestrial radio, and all that you get that fucking guy mean that I thought that that was a big, you know, I don't know. That's a big moment. That's that's right up there. You know when Maron had Obama on. I think when they look back at like literally podcasts come from. What was some of the watershed mo-? It's like I would say. I don't know. Stamps dot com starting to advertise, and then it goes over on Mark Marins. And then it's Joe Rogan's numbers and his wide variety of I mean, he had like Elon Musk on his show. The guy took a hit of a joint and it affected his stock prices. That's fucking amazing. Anyways. But meanwhile, here I sit in my fucking sweatpants talking to myself stubborn stubborn German Irish guy just going to do it this way. I don't want to talk to people, man. Now fucking with you. I if you've noticed when I do interviews. I'm a lot of times of too busy thinking about what the fuck I want to say or somebody said something and I drift off. And then it becomes like that Chris Farley thing where I'm just fucking grabbing the side of my pants going men when you did this. That was awesome. All right. So oh, Billy nobles bag. Okay. One hundred and seven fucking days. And I went to the gym yesterday for the first time in three years. I did a dip testing out my shoulders. Fortunately, where I go to the gym. They have like this the dip machine you can actually remove the dip bar and adjusted to your height. So I have it just way down near the floor. Where my arms are actually straight win. I'm holding onto it. And then I just sort of went up on my toes support, my weight with my arms and went up on my toes. Like, Michael Jackson. You know? And you know, minus that documentary whatever the fuck is going on with that. And which is low and myself down in every every time I felt a little bit stronger. And then yesterday, I was like I think I can do one. I did one felt all right? And then I kinda did three in a row, and I was just like why did I just do that? Because I'm finding what the rotator cuff. It's is it rotator a rotor cuff rotator cuff rotor cuff. Jesus christ. I've had this injury for three fucking years. And I don't it's one. You know, I just had these words that I don't really know how to say. So I just say them fast. People don't notice rotator cuff. Yeah. Oh, and I I just think is it rotator Cup a rotator cuff. I don't know what the fuck is. If you still listening. God bless you. That's all I can say so anyways, I was able to do that. And then they have one of those. Those those pull up machines that you can be on your knees with like, the weight and all that stuff. So I did like two or three of those. And now it's fucking AllAire says, I'm kind of feeling weird feeling in my other shoulder because I think this one got worn out because of the other one and. I think I've finally I'm just going to go get an MRI on both of my shoulders figure out what the fuck is going on. And then I might do a Rogan, but Rogan's, but telling me to do is go fuck fucking check out this guy that does the stem cell thing. And they just shoot it in there. And all of a sudden you like a fucking X men. I think I might do that. You know? I think I deserve that. I I didn't get the hair plugs. Right. I'm not doing both talks. I'm aging naturally. You know? I don't think say the wrong with rebuilding the engine in my fuck and shoulders. Jeez. My kids screaming. But anyways, I haven't been drinking haven't really been smoking. And. I don't know. I'm actually calling a fucking therapist today to fund because I've been saying on my on stage, I've been working on my anger, but I've been kind of doing it on my own. I've finally going to get some help here and. I've been doing this joke in my accent. Like if I just didn't have a temper like is far as wife's always trying to say. In a nice way tries this always trying to help you become a better person. Like, I think if I got rid of my temper, she would be out of suggestions. You know? Because other than my temper. I mean, I'm fucking crushing. Do you understand that guys? Do you understand that? I am a man. That can still afford to pay for direct directtv. Nine hundred channels three hundred fifty of which are radio stations. I listen to those. You know? I'll fucking I'll pay for that direct TV subscription. And then I'll order you have see fight and a sports package. I don't give a fuck. I'll fuck off. I'm fucking stare at at three hundred dollar Bill pay it just like that. I'm sorry. I'm doing this. I just was so shamed for still paying for fucking cable. And I I didn't I didn't know that. I'm gonna fuck it doing this shit where everything's like. I like it. All right there fucking TV. I watched this on my laptop. I watched this on my phone. I got this thing on my fucking pad Bill. They're all the same technology. You can watch your many where I I don't want to figure. I don't want to figure it out used to just fucking three fucking channels, boo. Boo. Doodoo? Ooh. You knew all the fucking socks making. The Wayne you world today who can turn the world with her smile. Who can take her hair enough and warm some cock-up there been Minneapolis. Well, the fucking Lakers have left out the only show in town is Mary Tyler Moore's forget, wore Pusey. Sorry. All right. Let's read some. Three some advertising. All right. Oh, look who's back everybody. But at at all zip. But. You know, hiring is a challenge. But there's one place you can go where hiring is simple. Sometimes you want to go where hiring people is fuck to bull. Boom, boom, boom, boom. And as far can fast and small boom, boo. Boo. You wanna keep off our booze without anybody giving you shit. You wanna hang with more alcoholics? Yep. A place where growing businesses connected to qualified candidates. That place is. Dot com slash Burr. Zipper sends your job to over one hundred of the web's leading job boards, but they don't stop there with their powerful matching technology zip. Scans thousands of resumes to find people with the right experience and invite them to apply to your job as applications come in zip. Recruiter, analyzes each one and spots light spotlights the top candidates. So you never miss a great match. Ziprecruiter is so affective that eighty percent of employees who post on. Preclu- get equality as my my nod to motorcycle racing. Get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. And right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free at this exclusive web address sip recruiter dot com slash Burr. That's ZipRecruiter dot com slash bar spell it out. P E R U. I T R dot com slash burp. Sip recruiter, this smartest way to hire. All right. Look, I talked about him earlier in here the stamps dot com. Everybody sliding in lake Kramer on Seinfeld. No one really has time to go to the post office. You're busy who's got? You got a busy looking at all watching your your your apps, you know, checkout fucking TV or be watching who's got time for all that traffic parking lugging, all your mail and packages. Let's get lugging mail. Jesus Christ how many fucking envelopes that you have. It's a pain in the s we get it. It's a real hassle man. That's why you need stamps dot com. One of the most popular time saving tools for small businesses. Businesses instances stamps dot com eliminates trips to the post office and save you money with discounts that you can get even at the post office stamps dot com brings all the amazing service. Of the US postal service right to your computer. Whether you're a small office sending invoices and online seller shipping up products. Or even a warehouse, sending thousands of packages a day stamps dot com can handle it all with ease. Simply use your computer to print official US postage twenty four seven for any letter, and he package any class of male any way, you want to send it once. Your mail is ready just handed over to your mail carrier or drop it in a mailbox mail carrier. You got that you see that that was was unisex not mailman. Not male woman, mail carrier person carrier was they mail. It's that simple stamps dot com. You get five cents off every first class stamp and up to forty percents off priority mail, not to mention it's a fraction of the cost of those expensive. Postage meters. Stamps dot com is a no brainer. Saving you time and money. It's no wonder over seven hundred thousand small businesses already used stamps dot com. Not to mention it's a fraction of the cost. I just went right back. I just was checking the time to see where I was at sorry. I'm not losing my right now. My listeners get a special offer that includes a four week trial, plus free postage and a digital scale without any long term commitment. Just go to stamps dot com. Click on the microphone top the homepage and try and type in burpee. You are that stamps dot com. Enter Bor be you are okay. Yeah, we go that was that was relatively painless. Right. You know, I realize halfway through this. I need to let somebody know that. I'm not gonna be able to get to where the fuck I'm supposed to be. Anyways, we plow forward here. Okay. Creepy Lennon mannequin. All right. Couple of weeks ago. I was in Liverpool. And I went down to this this. Oh, it says ready a magical Beatles museum. Okay. This. I actually I was making fun of that fucking John Lennon statue, we'll if you missed the episode. You literally the one of the first things you see, and it's like the white suit. Like, oh, fuck is that the white suit? Why would that be out here in the open where anybody could just take it you walk up? You realize it isn't the white suit. You realize it doesn't look like fuck, and John Lennon and all it's got this awful beard like tape to the thing's face. I mean, it just it just looks like a rip off. I mean, they might as well ahead of fuck to head goats standing out there or something. So I made fun of. So anyways, it says hi Bill, I work at the magical Beatles museum and parentheses. I like most of the staff agree with you, the mannequin should be thrown in the river. Merce mercy. Okay. The guys from cheap trick founded weird as well. All right. So that's a major fuck and band with. I believe that bands in the rock and Roll Hall of fame, and they are looking at it. Like, dude what the fuck. It's unfortunate you and your pal decided not to come in as the mannequin certainly does not represent. What is inside? The museum is on three floors. In his filled with three hundred and counting, genuine Beatles. Artifacts from one thousand nine hundred fifty nine to one thousand nine hundred seventy see now, this is making me wish I went in there, you gotta get rid of that fucking mannequin. These include the metals John Lennon war on the sergeant pepper cover while George Harrison's future Rama guitar. I know what that is the spotlight's from Abbey Road studios. Ringo's star snare drum Jesus seeds from Shea Stadium and the cello from the blue Jay way, video etc. Etc. Etc. The owner of the museum also the guy responsible for the creepy. Manikin is. Rogue Aspen Nali best. I couldn't tell if that was an affliction or a name a name. Okay. He's the son of Neil Aspinall e. Beatles Roti and head of apple records. He's also brother of Pete best, original, Beatles drummer, and is a great guy. Next time. You're a Liverpool come in. And we'll give you and your pals slash family of free tour. All the best Bill. Fuck that dude. I'm gonna pay I'm gonna pay. Although I would ask them it does peak it upset that he started a fucking museum to the band that fired him fart is brother. It's got to be kind of weird, right? I don't know. I'm sure shift Pete best is over it at this point. Right. I have is there any other? You know, that's another thing. Too on Twitter. I'm an old, man. I'm still on Twitter. Right. I'm still on the Twitter. Some they had this this hashtag going around that said. Not popular opinions and people would say like, I don't know pick. Somebody like, I don't think it. Dell has a good voice, you know, stupid shit. Like, nobody said that by the way. I'm just happy. I noticed their name. I was calling her Atalay for a long fuck at time. But somebody wrote the Beatles are overrated. That's another one. That's a big one when Molyneux's appear edgy. They go there overrated. Oh, are they? Okay. Okay. Well, maybe if you read up on the history at some fucking point on she's like a phone call hand a second. All right. Is it thing about that? I understand if the Beatles, you're young, and the Beatles music doesn't move you. Because I mean, it's music from literally fifty fucking years ago at this point that's the end of their career to and then the other stuff is coming up on sixty years. Okay. So in defense, you guys I understand that. If you don't like it or does but they're not overrated. I mean, they just they influenced an entire generation. Of of bands to get started. They made the whole fucking thing possible. And because of them you're listening to the music that you're listening to today, they are in undeniable part of music history. But I would never be this old guy going like, you know, if you told me that music sucks. I'm not going to argue that that's just like I mean, if I fucking grew up now, I would like some of their songs, even I remember in the eighties like liking them in my teacher being like going, dude. You don't get it. You don't get how fucking huge it was when a Beatles album came out. It's like the thal the fucking world stopped for younger people than you bought it and people do it. I got the new Beatles album. Everybody came over and fucking listen to it. I mean, I wasn't even part of that. So, but as far as like like verbally hates the Beatles. And he's just like yellow submarine Bill yet. Hello subject. Everybody's got a bad fucking joke in their act come on. Anyways. I whatever I I get it. I get it. It's too much time has passed. I've heard I've heard younger comics talk about some big comics that way and not get like what the big deal is. But what happens is is the further. Like looking Beethoven. Can you? Fuck it imagine when that ship I came out. Like it just fucking sitting there. You gotta goddamn boil the size of my foot on the side of fucking head. You're fighting off typhoid yellow fee. Whatever the fuck goddamn plague. And also this guy just shows up with one hundred dollars friends. He added. Like do what the fuck? You know? And now, you're just sitting there eating a subway sandwich in an elevator and in the backgrounds going, but at the, but at the just it just doesn't have the same fucking impact. But it doesn't mean the dudes overrated. Does it fucking? Anyway, moving ahead here or if you look at if you look at what is the the salt? If watched sultry do you watch some of the people dancing from way, fucking back. Then there's a lot of them that I've compared today standards. I'm not talking about the legendary dances just people on the dance floor when I watched because he loves that show, and I'll be just watching. I just laughed going. Like, you know, there's a lot of people on this show that are dancing at a level that awful white people dance at today like the bar just keeps getting raised off of the work. So if you go back the hardest thing to do when you go back in history is to block out what has happened since. Then and try to put it into historical perspective, which is practically impossible. It's like going back and looking at John United's how he threw for over forty thousand yards in his career and like the next closest guy had half as much as that. But now I like the way the rules have changed like a fucking God damn backup quarterback will throw for thirty thousand in his career. So it doesn't seem like a big deal. So I don't know. I'm just defending the Beatles. That's all now. I feel bad that I trust this fucking museum. And I judged by that goddamn mannequin. I think the whole purpose. All that was me just realizing that I'm a bit of a haze a bit of a count. There is as a bit of a. Cheesy cheesy babies. Dear Billy badge have you seen? These pussies throwing cheese onto their kids faces. I saw one of them. It's just. The fucking desperation for people to get views. On the internet to the plummet. Look, I'm a performer. I have a desperation for it. I get it on some level. But when you start like the Montevideo's, I just see parents with like their kids. Right. And they're starting to fall, and they don't do anything. They just film it. So they can laugh, and they just like let their kid get hurt is, you know, the real ones like you can tell it wasn't set up is because raise the kid starts to fall. Like that you see the fucking phone flies out of frame, and you actually miss the kid fallen down. You can tell the parent lunch and tried to save the person. But yeah, I don't get it. Anyways. Sicom the person said how much do you hate yourself that you'd throw cheese on a baby's face? Just imagine what type of memory is sublimely stored where a baby sees a camera and then something hit their face. I'd arrest all these asshole parents and throw firehose water in at their faces. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if it does like psychological damage to the baby if you can even fuck and remember it like some day. It's going to be in Philly, and they'll hey, you wanna get a cheese steak because like fucking starts slamming the sandwich and do its face. I don't know that it does that there is just the thing where when you are you become a parent, you sound like defenseless and helpless. You kid is. I'm not advocating being a helicopter parent. I'm not saying that but. This just something about filming it. Like, it's the kid obviously doesn't enjoy it. Obviously startles the kid, and the fact that you're putting your own fucking adult needs ahead of that. I mean, I all of that that whole category is giving you kid a stupid fucking name like coathanger or some dumb Hollywood celebrity fucking name or. Putting your fucking political agenda like your kid is gonna live your political agenda. I'm raising my kid gender-neutral. And then all of a sudden, you kiss your son as to where a fucking dress. Just so you can show off how fucking progressive you are rather than asking the kid if he just wants a football. Instead, you know what I mean like your going to make that decision. I think all of that stuff is. I don't know what I'm not a psychologist. I it's not how I would do it. You know, I think you should if you kid starts to fall you should try to catch your kid. I think if this cheese you should hand it to your child if your kid wants to eat it. They eat it. If they don't that you finish it get a few more pounds like a dead, right? I don't know. And I I also just like if you kid fucks up, and then you put it on the internet. It's just like it exists forever. And kids are already made you're literally giving like. Ammunition. Somebody showed me this video this woman or kid was being a class clown dancing at school, and she gave him the option. She says I'm either going to give you the belt or you can dance. So the kid is crying because he's scared and he's sitting there doing this half as like dancing while he's crying and everybody thinks it's funny. It's like this fucking kid has to go to school not to mention. You shoulda hit a kid with a belt? There's like so many fucking things that are wrong with it. I don't know. So yeah, I don't. I don't like. And I think, you know, your instincts that you're that mad that you could feel the anger that you have towards it. Yeah. Like, you shouldn't do that. And I imagine with your level of anger like some shit was done to you. As was done to me. And I think you go one or two ways either repeated slash try to take it to the next level or. You just go back to like, I remember what that felt like I'm not doing that. Why would I do that? But you know, there's a lot of morons that. You don't have to be smart to know how to fuck. That's the thing if they just made it like something like like if it was as difficult is is getting a degree in something. I think the world would be a better place, but anybody can be like my dick standard up. I want to dig it in their next thing. You know, you have a fucking kid you throw in cheese at it. And you're filming it. I don't I it's I wouldn't do it. We'll see we'll see what the fallout is. But my kids not going to be part of that fucking experiment. All right Premier League. Soccer soccer is in quotes. So I'm magin. This is fucking somebody who doesn't live in the US. Hey, Billy ball breaker. I've been listening for a long time and really enjoy your podcast especially during football season. As I find your analysis is put more in layman's terms for us Brits being a fellow patriot fan. Nice here. Also gets me shit as most people follow the Seahawks. Wasn't that interesting? If you don't mind right back in let me know, why did they follow the Seahawks? Is it because it's always cloudy over there. And they have the same kind of weather in Britain as they do in Seattle. That's really interesting. I've enjoyed your recent ramblings about the Premier League and Liverpool's battle with Manchester this year. So I thought I'd share a few facts you may enjoy and help you understand more Liverpool were actually the more successful team in history with eighteen league titles. Oh, yeah. I heard about this. This is like before the Premier League existed. It's almost like pre Super Bowl era. They had five Europe aka so eighteen league titles five European titles in a bunch of other cups until recently when their biggest rivals, Manchester United overtook them and have twenty titles, but only three European titles. So that's basically the Celtics and Lakers of Premier League football. Given your gripe about the Steelers I thought you'd be interested to know that all eighteen of Liverpool's titles were before the Premier League era, but are still very much counted here as it should be. Yes, it should there. Ricky pedia page is very interesting as they have also faced tragedies along with other clubs and still cake out on top never heard that expression. Unless you that's a typo. Secondly, Mant, man city are only recently a good team as ten years ago they were about. They were. I think he missed a word here as ten years ago, they were about over by Arab. I think they were bought out is what he wanted Arab billionaires. And if basically play paid extraordinary amounts of money for the best players and are still not quite good enough to win all the cups. See this is this is what you need to get into it. It's already a beautiful game. And now I need is to the back story in the drama. So I think that's really interesting that man city always sudden they have all this money. Which who gives a fuck 'cause you know, before then everyone was probably going to Man United or Liverpool. If they wanted to win a title now here they come out of nowhere. I like it. It's good. You guys all got money. The Boston Red Sox Liverpool. God knows they got fucking more money than God. What about Man United? Did. They got a bunch of money. But that legacy I feel like they need to do something soon or all of a sudden it starts to fade a little bit. Like the Michigan wolverines like thank God. They got what's his face there? Captain comeback to save any even though he hasn't been know-how state yet Harbaugh save that fucking program because you can only be bad for so long. We're all this. If you suck for kids in recruits entire life. They don't give a shit that becomes beetle ever stuff. Like. Yeah. Whatever that's yellow submarine football. I don't give a fuck about it. And they're going to end up the Oregon came out of nowhere. Because all of a sudden, they started having these cool uniforms started winning games. Abbott on a total tangent here. So let's Thirdly going on what you said about the offsides rule and the defending player slowing down they can do this. But if the attacking player is behind them when the ball is played. There's still onside and can score way. How does that work? The attacking player is behind them. When the ball is played. What does that mean? He ran past him with the ball. He can't go pass the last Fender without the ball. Right. So the attacker must time their run with the other players making the pass and the defending players must do the same. But also be aware that if they get a lie see what you're saying. So like if he's like parallel. Two. Or is it perpendicular parallel to the defenseman? And somebody kicks the ball past defenseman. He can take off as the balls kit. And then he won't he'll still be on side. I get that. All right. That's a little more. Okay. So it's sort of like a moving blue line. I guess I really appreciate you taking the time to explain this to me though. So let me read that against slowly when the ball is played that means kicked, I guess, then they are still on the outside and could score. So the way where the fuck with Thirdly going on what you said about the offsides rule the defending player slowing down they can do this. But if the attacking player is behind them when the ball is played meaning kicked than they are still on and could scores. So the attacker must time their run. With their other player. I liked that. There's a finesse to that. I have to respect making the pass. Do you have to respect it? You fucking arrogant, whatever I'm trying to be nicer and the defending players must do the same. But also be aware that if they get. If they get wrong they have to chase back and stop the goal. There are also other factors such as the other player isn't involved in the play. He is an offside and can stand anywhere. All right apologies for the length. Naaman? You actually cleared it up a little bit more still don't think one hundred percent understand it because I don't know how far away you have to be from the play, and you can still be on side. Hope you find this interesting, and please do a show in either Belfast or Dublin so I can go. Thanks and go fuck yourself. I was on Dublin last June. I have met a Belfast in a little bit. But I have to tell you how excited the tours. I've done this year through Europe been incredible. And I got one more that starts in Iceland. The end of April and. It's I don't know. It's just incredible. The people showing up the venues I get to play too. Yeah. I don't know. I'm still kind of blown away by that. So I'm looking forward to it. And I still have not been down to Australia. I keep saying something always ends up coming up. I got some acting work at push some dates, but after I do my next year on the next one. I do I have to go back to Australia because I haven't been there in a couple of years. All right now. I just take the specialists, and I got to build the fucking our backup again. And I can't go over there when it's week. I gotta make sure you know, because those ozzy's fucking people don't screw around, right? So I to make sure it's where needs to be. But I will figure all this out. All right. All right. Bye neural all beats B. I N U A R A L beats dear Bill have you heard of binary? I'll beats they're a great alternative to silent meditation and have the same benefits. All you need is a nice pair of headphones and YouTube on your phone just wanted to let you know because I'm also an angry sometimes. I found these and they really help with every negative emotion there even a few. There are even a few that apparently help with migraines. Check them out. Thanks for the left. Is this a real thing? It's this thing. Let me see me go. Let me let me let me let me let me look this up here. Be I n U A R A L for the people looking up to beats. Right. All right. This is for meditation his three hours and fifteen minutes. Let's we'll little listen to a little bit of this. Vegetarians LV. We'll eat French fries. Delta. Here we go. Here is some by neural beats. Sounds like a horror movie. All right. Can get into that startup. Little scary started off, I'm not gonna do a little. Speaking scary moves if if you see Jordan Peele, the trailer, I know movie. That movie. Looked so scary almost angry at because I'm gonna go see. I saw that all my God. And I was like to fuck that movie. Fuck that I'm gonna go see, but she's Christ. Oh my God. I fucking hate scary movies. But I love George, so I'm gonna go see that. I also love. The last one did so, but like this one looks like it's just full on fucking horror and. I don't eat that. But I'm gonna go. See it. All right. Boyfriend's family is silent during dinner, we should go. See it me. And then we'll come on the podcast and talk about like, oh my God. I love that. I love the scared, and I'll be fucking. Pissed that I went through that shit. You know, I told you what I saw when I saw the Blair witch. I had set at the laugh factory. And I went to the movie the midnight showing by myself, and then I walked down to the parking garage. By myself to the car just totally freaked off like Josh. I. I I'm not one of those people that can just sit there be like this is the movie I fucking by in. And it scares the shit out of me. All right. Boyfriend's family is silent during dinner. Okay. Let's see. What do we do with this one? Dear bill. I need some advice about a guy. I've been seeing who is great. But his family are kind of strange. They are lovely and quite nice. But they are incredibly awkward went together as a family. It's not that they say or do where things that we basically sit in silence when we're together when I first met him when I first met them. Jesus christ. I feel like I should be playing that meditation music fucking years. I read this. There's nobody there stirring coffee. Slowly, are they or t whatever it was when I first met them. I thought that they must have just came from a funeral because we went out for lunch. And it was eerily silent I was trying to be nice, and that's few question. But I was just getting one word answers. I asked my boyfriend about this. And he had no idea what I was talking about even started to get a bit defensive. All right. Well, there you go. That's just how they are. We've been dating about six months, and I dread seeing that because it feels like I'm being tortured in and under threat of speaking. My boyfriend is completely oblivious to it and love seeing his family, which is crazy weird because I would say he is reasonably outgoing and fun. When we go out with a group of friends that is what's really fucking weird. So I stopped seeing him or do you think? You missed a word you'd think would be some good techniques for dealing with them. Please. Give me some advice. You're single. You're not married. So this is all about you. All right. You you just have to have to figure out do. I love this guy. You haven't even said you loved him. My end of this person enough to put up with this like these people you have a kid with this guy. These fucking non talk and mother fuckers coming over the house. All right. It seems like you're early on. We like should I stop seeing this guy should maybe. It all depends on how much she liked the guy. That's so it's so weird that there. It's not weird that they're like that. And it's not weird that he's oblivious because your family just seems like family, you grew up, but the fact. That. He loves seeing them. That's what's weird to me. Like if they just like a not close cold family that barely talks. That's usually would mean that I say once every year year and a half I come around during the holidays, and then that's it. But the fact that he goes there all the time to sit there and not say anything to them. I don't know it starts making me wonder if they're like fucking aliens or something their communicating through the center of their foreheads or some shit. Yeah. That's definitely strange. And the fact that you're so uncomfortable that now you're thinking, maybe there's some good techniques that you're going to go in there. And Dr Phil and fixed the whole fucking family in one segment, it's not going to happen. So I think you need to. You gotta make tough choice. They're all right me. The let this great guy go and try to find another great guy you sound like you're still young still drafted in the first couple rounds. So there's plenty of good talent left out there. Maybe you could have more of a normal family. But that is or. You just learn to deal with their creepy horror show fucking vibe. But. I don't know what good techniques you're gonna use the fix that. Especially when you brought it up to he had no idea that you were talking about and was like defensive about it. So. So there is that anyways. I'm gonna try that that fucking horror music chanting shit. Sorry. You your I think I would actually like this better than. I have meditation happen. It's just this. This guy just keeps talking throughout being like Hello again. Welcome to another beautiful day with an opportunity to clear your mind at Tate. I'd like you to find a comfortable chair. And just sit in. The chair. Up against your body. Are there places that it's touching you too much? Desert. He'll just right. Fuck that shit. It's like, oh my God. To shut the fuck up. All right. Just tell me to breathe just shut up please for the love of God shut up. So I think I would rather rather listen that guy add rather listen to this. I don't mean in this. So fucking such a creepy. Goddamn way. Maybe I need to listen to this shit. So I can go see Jordan peels fucking movie and not be overly freaked out traumatized by. How great is it that guy's making movies? Every once in a while somebody fucking like that comes along. It's just awesome. It's awesome. If you love movies. It's fucking awesome. All right. That is the that is the podcast, ladies, gentlemen. I'll check in on you on Thursday. Go Bruins, go Celtics. Anybody knows how if I can watch a replay of the Moto GP race. I would love to watch it Senate to my Twitter account. Please. Let me know. I would love to see it. All right. That's it. Go fuck yourselves and I'll see on Thursday.

Coming up next