Patrice Washington Tells Us How to Earn More Money & Have More Wellbeing


There are literally people who are not sleeping at night because you're their solution and they're waiting for you to step up and shine so that they can see you and finally get the result that they're looking for they need you now more than ever. I believe that the opposite of depression. It's not happiness its purpose. I believe that every single person has something unique to contribute to the world. And that's why I wanted to create a show called. Don't keep your page. I don't keep your day. Job is about out what it is you do in this world that only you can do to make the world more whole more beautiful and to stop selling yourself short. Stop sitting it out to figure out how to take this thing. Love whether it's art or music or screen writing or dance baking. How did you leave this Europe into a life that you get contribute that you get to do you love full-time because it's not just about business it's about contribution it's about meaning that is what we seek? That is what we truly want absolutely are here to serve the world. I want help you figure out. Just how much value you have inside of you and every single week we're GONNA be talking to people who have something to add to help you get out of your own way to help you be more successful to help be the truest expression of you. My name is Cathy Heller. I'm so glad that you're here. Let's dive in thanks to ship station for supporting. Keep Your Day job. No matter where you're selling Amazon at sea or your own website ship station brings all your orders into one simple interface. Making them really easy to manage from any device. Even your cell phone use my offer code dream job to get a sixty day free trial. Hey guys it's Kathy. Welcome back to another episode of. Don't keep your day job. I hope you had a meaningful sweet mother's Day. It was a mixed bag just to keep it super real. I had one really lovely moment where I took my girls on a little walk around her neighborhood. And we found little sticks and stones and we saw a couple of butterflies and that was magical and then The kids did bring me like sin abundant. They made an artwork and that was awesome but at one point in the day my husband and I got into an argument and I was like so upset and I realized that one of the things that women can do a better job of and people in general can do a better job of is we really neglect ourselves. Like the people who love us. Love us but it's really hard when for a really long time we are depleted. Because we don't do for ourselves and we don't really clearly say this is what I need. This is what I desire and instead where giving and giving and doing and doing and we need a nap or we need a break and then when we ask for it instead of saying this is what I need right. Now this is what would really make me feel great or you know we come from a place like. Oh my God I don't understand. Why can't you keep the kids quiet for an hour? You know what I'm saying so I just keep learning that lesson over and over that I need to do a better job of saying this is what I need and being better at knowing how to take care of myself and I think we all could use that speaking of which. I'm really really thrilled. Because this week. We start the here for this five day challenge. Because I'm here for this. I'm here for you. I'm here for all of it and we're going to get into that this week. We're going to talk about. What are you really need? And what's going to make you feel more like yourself? What's GonNa make you feel more apiece and what's going to help you get through this time? And what is possible during this time? If you haven't signed up it's not too late. You can go to Cathy DOT COM SLASH. Here for this and it's five days. It's free we start today. I'll be live every single day in our free group which you will get a link to join when you sign up and I'll be there every day at noon Pacific but if you sign up we'll send you the replay even if you can't be there and I highly recommend you sign up because I'll be live every day. We'll send you the replays if you can't make it and you'll get these awesome homework assignments and just so much great content that I think is going to make you feel so supported so seen and it's GonNa give you so much hope so. Join me for that because I would love to spend that time with you okay. Now let's talk about today's episode because it's so good you're in for such a treat. Patrice Washington is here. She is a bestselling author. A transformational speaker hope restoring coach podcast host media personality. She's also known as America's money Maven and she's the founder of redefining wealth and earn more Money Movement for women. She's on a mission to redefine the term wealth and teach people to chase purpose not money and she's built a thriving community of high achieving women committed to creating a powerful life vision in their careers home health and personal finances. She has some awesome books in her real money. Answer series that you should definitely check out but you also really just seem to listen to our podcast. Redefining Wealth Patrice Washington where she shares her insights at enlightening guest interviews. That's going to empower you to live your purpose. Find fulfilment and earn more without chasing money. She's GonNa tell you about her unbelievable story and you guys brace yourself because her words and her message are going to speak life into you without further ado please welcome the one and only Patrice Washington the trees. I'm so happy that you're here. Thank you for joining me. I'm so happy to be here Kathy. You're so adorable. So filled with light and energy and enthusiasm and smarts. You are so smart and you've been doing so much to help other women. Just get out of their own crap and level up in such a meaningful way. I want to talk about your story. So tell us your story because it is pretty epic. Actually my story really I would say. My defining moment came in two thousand nine when I was on the bathroom. Floor of my teeny tiny apartment. Balling us not crying. Saying God. Why me why me? How did I get here? I have been a good person. I operate in integrity. Treat people with respect. And how could all of this happened to me and what happened? Was the recession hit. I own a real estate and mortgage brokerage which I started at twenty one years old built it to a bigger business by twenty five and when the recession was I really rearing its ugly head. I was on hospital bedrest. I taken a fall down the stairs in my house. And it's a preterm Labor at twenty weeks pregnant. I hit Cedar Sinai Ahead Twenty weeks. And they said Ma'am side. This baby is GonNa come any moment now and I did the only thing that I knew to do. I just. I started praying praying praying and what was supposed to be any minute now turned into several hours turned into over a full day in that emergency room and they admitted me. I ended up in this room and what was supposed to be any minute now turned into several weeks. Actually it was a full ten weeks before my daughter comes so I lived in Cedar Sinai Medical Center in Beverly Hills for ten weeks. Well around five weeks into their journey though Kathy. I'm watching the news in every single day. They're talking about the banks closing down and here I am on bedrest. Have Sixteen loan officers in real estate agents and they cannot close a deal. We have clients who are losing their deposits. We have people who are angry. But there's literally nothing that anybody can do and I'm on this hospital address with a belt around my ways monitoring me twenty four seven in my doctor comes in and Dr Lee and she says Patrice. Listen I don't know what you're stressing about. But if you don't stop you're GONNA leave your two years in a row with no baby because the year before. I had a son prematurely around twenty four weeks and he passed after five hours in my arms. Same Dr Singh floor saying hospital and I had to make a choice to surrender because as much as my business had been my baby this was going to finally be my chance to leave with a healthy baby and I was like God you know what if I did it before. I just have to believe that you'll show me how to do it again. But I can't force. I can't manipulate. I can't do anything in this situation. The only thing that I can do is surrender and I asked them to take the TV out of the room and they had the maintenance people come in and take the TV off the wall. Because I didn't even WANNA be tempted wit watching the news and letting that doom and gloom and all these stories overwhelming so they came they took the TV off the wall and my husband brought me a Bible. He brought me an IPOD. We have ipads yet. He brought me an ipod with praise and worship music and I had a red leather bound journal and every day I sang to that baby. I wrote prayers. I wrote letters to her about who she would be in what she would look like. And I read my Bible and add thirty weeks pregnant. She Finally Kane. He'd had enough about thirty weeks and five days And she was born three pounds two houses and I left that hospital after three weeks of her. Being in the nick you left the hospital with a beautiful baby girl who was twelve years old But I also left with over three hundred thousand dollars in medical debt. Because I didn't know that while I was in the hospital my Sheri- had dropped me so now deals closed. No business going on all the overhead. I owned thirteen pieces of real estate between my husband and I some were just in his name but collectively we own thirteen pieces of real estate. Many of our tenants were losing their jobs. They weren't paying rent and it was an absolute nightmare. So by the time you fast forward at my home had foreclosed a year later after me. Getting out of the hospital my six thousand square foot house foreclosed and we found ourselves in this any bidding weaning six hundred square foot apartment in metairie Louisiana. Which is where I was on that floor balling smarten crying and saying God. How did I get here because I went to school? I did the right thing. Educated people right. I heard a still small voice. Get Your Bible and I ended up getting my Bible and I landed on. The scripture was proverbs. Seventeen sixteen in Aceh. What good is money in the hands of if they had no desire to seek wisdom? What good is money in the hands of a fool if they had no desire to seek wisdom and that was the very first time then it hit me that I had been smart had all the education at a degree from the University of Southern California and I had a certifications. I had all the knowledge in the world but I didn't understand wisdom because wisdom is knowing how to apply that knowledge in win to apply in with home in because I didn't have wisdom. I never asked for help and never ask for support. I suffered in silence. My friends and family knew nothing about what was going on with us once we moved. We everything on craigslist in two days and just hit hit it. Nobody knew and we were all by ourselves and reading that scripture. It was that moment. It just did something to me as a lightbulb moment and I remember just thinking like man. I want to tell people this I want to tell people like. I know that you'd think it's all about money that you feel like if I just go harder go bigger. Go go better just keep grinding and all this stuff that everything will be fine. But that's not true light. There's another piece year so from that. Moment March ninth two thousand nine till present. My whole life has been about helping people understand that this journey is not just about chasing money. It's about seeking wisdom. I have not stopped crying for the last leg nine minutes. You're so incredible and bring to the table all the nuances of this conversation. And how much you grasp and how much you've been through and just how you gracefully talk about. Not only the grace you were given. But your grace of surrender and the wisdom and the self awareness that you pulled from. That story is so beautiful. Portrays I just today was listening to Gary V and he was saying? I'm so sad that people associate me with hustle. Because that's not really me. And he's like I'm all about like the fun and the fulfillment and I think what you just said is like people are literally losing the entire treasure because you grind grind four. What but here's what I WANNA get into now. Which is just so unbelievably stunning. You didn't make a choice which was and therefore my friends. You need to not have money and you need to live very small. You made the choice to say. How can I step back? Look at my gifts. Look at how the world needs me and served from a purpose driven place and make certain that it really fits the paradigm of how I want to live really wealthy which is to really have wealth. My Life Children. Yes time. So what does that look like? How do we build? I'm really glad you asked that because for so long. You know when I got up off the bathroom floor the first thing I could think of because I had just been introduced to someone who was a mommy blogger starbucks and I didn't know what blogging was before that moment. This is a long time ago. Now it wasn't like everybody had a blog and you can't from world like now it's like you're podcasting your books but by then commander business. I wasn't in the online space. I didn't really understand but I just knew that I felt like I was called to share this nugget of wisdom even in the midst of being right in the middle of it because I was receiving eviction notices an shutoff notices and still. There was something in me that said you have to share so I started this blog and I thought that you know at least my friends and family would read and actually come to find out within weeks. Nobody was like my husband. My mom wearing even reading and I became obsessed with this off of like but people should know and so long story short. That blog turned into me eventually writing for other big websites and magazines and then radio and then it became for years on the Steve Harvey Show and then it became all the TV success. And all this stuff right. But I found myself Kathy slipping into the cliches when some would say how did you do it? I started to say things like dream big and you know work hard and follow your passion. I was like a her myself one day. I was like who are you? You're not the girl that was on the floor. I said in that moment essay got when you restore me at NASA. When I said if you were stormy I will go everywhere. I can tell people the truth the truth about wealth because I was starting in looking at the difference between knowledge and wisdom. The other thing that idea was researched wealth was and wealth was not material. Money and wealth was not money and material possessions alone. Wealth was the condition of wellbeing so while I felt it acceptable to talk about budgeting or credit reports or these things that I knew. Because it's what helped me build my business. It's how I educated my clients in the first place in the real estate mortgage business. I didn't feel comfortable talking about all the other things that I was really doing behind the scenes because I thought if you WANNA be a personal finance expert you need to stick to the hardcore money topics but the more that I did that I found myself doing a disservice to the very people wanted to serve because people heard they should save ten percent of everything that comes in. They heard they should budget. They know that there's three credit bureaus they know these things. They know everything. They're big Mama told him about money which that's all most of us really need to know like on a very basic level but what they didn't understand was the fact that were so consumed with chasing what they thought was the in goal with the money that they were leaving all these other parts of themselves. Just Open And cluttered and unfulfilled not tapped into so it was having a negative impact on their money. So while you can read personal finance book after book after book. There's a reason that your behaviors not matching up. And what I got to was. Stop Lying. You're lying you're lying. You're telling a half truth if you're not gonNa tell people everything that you know to be true about. Well if you're only going to keep talking about money that's one aspect that's one pillar. That's one skill set. What about their faith? What about the fulfillment? They have with their work. What about their relationships with their environment? What about how what they think of themselves if you stop having these very surface level conversations? You're never going to be able to support the way that you want to. So was only just a couple years ago that I was like now I gotta allow myself to get out of the personal finance box in have all of the conversations that I wanNA have. God what you just said and you articulated so well that that when you look up the definition of wealthy it was your relationship to well. Being one of my best friends said to me you know Kathy. You're rich but you don't live like you're rich. I said what do you mean? She said? 'cause YOU YOU'RE ON. Zim Calls all day long like year constantly. Working she goes rich. People don't do that really rich people. They're hanging out you know on the Hammock by the pool. You don't live that way and I was like. Oh my God like I had gotten myself into this place a way that I was living day day day after day. It was just like this guy. Yeah and I had shingles and I had a miscarriage and I had pneumonia and I was like something has to be changed and what I realized Patrice and I want to hear what you have to say about. It is most often. We work hard but we don't work smart. Why don't you share with us? What happened for you after the bathroom floor after the awakening has find your path here and tell us all the things that you that you really love that you do in your business to day. Now I'm GONNA connected all because at redefining wealth. Our very first pillar is the fifth pillar. It's about becoming your bestself and because of what you just shared. I really want to to kind of jump there because these are the things that I was doing. That people didn't understand really publicly. Talk about but I know that it's led to who I am today and where I am today in the reason that the fifth pillar I is because I always tell people if you have a vision for your life. It's your duty and responsibility to protect the only vessel you get to execute that vision. We don't get multiple bodies in life. You get one physical body right and we have been groomed and we have been misinformed for so long that if we hustle and grind like that is the way we don't really hear enough about easing flow we hear hustle and grind and so we see people on social media who are glorifying things like. I have not slept in days. And it's this whole thing about sleeping two three hours a night. Here's the deal you. Let's nuts more sleeping to three hours a night. There is no way for you to have the physical capacity to receive anything that you say. You're praying for you can pray all you once and I've been there where I was like God. Enlarge my territory. I want to see the whole world. I was already on a national tour right but I was like I want to go international and I remember when I was in the emergency again. Emergency Room again. This is years later. I was there for food poisoning but they did some tests and they came in and said you realize you have like way more problems. Food poisoning him like. Oh is that sell. Your iron levels are really low. You're extremely anemic. Your hemoglobin levels are so low like literally. If you were older we would be giving you a blood transfusion right now. But we're GONNA we're going to trust you to get so haematologist right. I had been ignoring the signs have been ignoring the symptoms. I didn't know shortness of breath was a problem right. Extreme fatigue constant exhaustion. But I was like well. I wore those things as a badge of honor. I exhaustion as a badge of honor. Because I was hustling grinding and I was building my empire so I thought it was okay to be exhausted and especially as a mother and a wife if my husband or my daughter had ever said they had those symptoms. I would have never let them go that long. But many of us especially women we will suffer in silence and we will go along with the symptoms will diagnose ourselves on. Web MD and we think that we can fix it and keep going. But if I have such a big call on my life if I had people to serve I do myself and my audience and everyone that I was called to help a disservice when I don't take care of myself that comes first that beyond even knowing what you're passionate about and all the things about purpose and everything else you have to take care of you you know without s Kathy. Where's our family and look at all the people we serve what happens right so the very first part is being physically fan but we follow that also would being mentally fit and this is what I wanted to share with you about what your friend said. It is tapping into childhood wounds. That childhood trauma is what causes you to work as if you have not made it right like yes. You're always striving and you WANNA do more but the truth is you don't have to work to the limit that you still work or that you were choosing to still work at that time that she had the conversation with you and like you and like all of us we have these childhood traumas and we have these things that impact how we see money how we see ourselves how we see. Financial Success in much of it is done through different conditioning. So whether those are verbal influences what did you hear about money right? If you heard someone say the moment that you start working you lose or you'll you'll lose everything that could be something that's running in the back of your head without you even thinking about it. It's like a sub-conscious belief right. I know verbal verbal influences. There's modeling there specific incidents. But even if it's not money related for me I grew up hearing that I was the ugly one so I was always the only person in the family. And I was the Blackie I was the dark easy. My Lips were to fool. My is too weird. I always got made fun of and I don't mean a school I mean at home. I mean in my family. Okay so I knew that I was smart so I leaned into being smart but I've never felt beautiful. I never felt pretty. I was not the pretty friend right. It was always something then I go to school. I'm tall five ten in ninth grade so I'm taller than most the boy. He's thin so I used to wear extra clothes. Everything that could be wrong was wrong. People pick me apart and it wasn't until I was twenty five years old after three years of therapy that I could look in the mirror and not cringe and wished that I looked like somebody else. I was a little girl in the bathtub. Scrubbing my skin. 'cause I thought that I was dirty. 'cause someone told me. I was thirty and I thought that if I scrubbed hard enough that there would be something lighter underneath and was like a bath away from trying to bleach my skin with real bleach. This is a third and fourth grade child because of the trauma that I experienced at the hands of people who said they left me. And why is that important? I share that because when I look at my life today and I look at all the personal development and the therapy and all the stuff. That's gotten me to this place and I see myself on. National Television on stage in front of thousands of people are my face on these book covers. I know that I could not be who I am today. If I did not deal with my childhood trauma and I know that there are so many people who are listening right. Now you have all the degrees you have all the education you've taken all the courses you listen to all the podcast. You are not short on knowledge at all but you may need to go deal with some childhood trauma that is stopping you from showing up in just doing the things that you already know to do. Because I know Kathy knows. We're both coaches. You can tell someone over and over again. Just do it this way. Just follow these steps. I've laid out the plan and they will not follow in. They cannot follow. It's not a cognitive thing. It is emotional trauma. It had trauma in your business is only going to grow to the extent that you are willing to heal that trauma. God I mean again. The words are so incredibly powerful. Your vulnerability is exquisite. And I'm like literally baffled by how you experienced acts and literally exude. Why because you glow like? I'm literally awe like intimidated by how gorgeous you are. So they but exists goes to show what a joke like. What are you on? No one sees that the point is your show ethic the work you've done on yourself. It's so apparent. Because what you feel when you're in the presence of you. I just feel possibility and hope and boom. I'm only feel like light and magic and you're like do you see it and it's for you like the fact that you bring that to people and you've been through what you've been through to me is just so epic so that's number one number two hundred percent. It's the the case I love what you just said. A friend of mine had said to me. There's a difference between having money earning money. Okay and certain people we earn. We are good at earnings so even when we have it. We don't act like we do so often I meet people. They have a goal. They hit the goal. They move goalpost. They still have a relationship with in order for me to have in order for me to receive. I have to literally like crawl on my knees for thousands of miles so so many people listening right now are probably like preach amen. I'm in but like how you know. How do I know that I have value? If I don't really feel like I do. How do I start a business? Is that even mean? What's the first step? How can I get there? How can I figure out what I'm good at? How could possibly make a living with ease? So there's a couple of things that come to mind immediately The first thing is giving yourself permission to really embrace your gifts so I think a part of why people want the journey to be hard or why they expect it to be hard is because it just does not seem real that you should be able to do work that you love and things that you're naturally good at and charge the money that you want to charge what I hear from women so often is but like that's why God gave me in in. It's like right exactly. That's what God gave you to produce. Well that's not what God gave you to get pants. Oh to give away freely and not acknowledge your worth or your value. We tend to think that when something comes to US freely that. It's so easy that we shouldn't do anything with it. We tend to negate. The gift will say things like mean anyone can do that. Or everybody's good at that or anybody can do this. And it's like actually now. I have friends that can throw together. Gourmet meals I mean macgyver. The most random ingredients together until it is amazing. And then you have me who walks in the kitchen and I immediately start to sweat and getting Zaidi right not my gift. Not My strong suit rate. So it's acknowledging I that there is a gift and then embracing that that's the thing and not searching forever and ever thinking no it must be this thing like my gift to speaking period. Can I just raise my hand and say that I know that's your gift to I? WanNa be one like sixteen million people who goes YEP? I knew that my speaking that is the very thing Kathy that I got in trouble for the all through school and I remember my first grade teacher Ms Poynton. I have been where would raise my hand. Always have the answer. I want to know the answer and she says Miss Cunningham. She My may name put your hand down. I was like excuse me. That's what I'm thinking that my six zero bring like what's have the answer. She needs to call me. You kept me back at recess and she said I know you know the answer but at this point you need to be willing to help your other friends. Who Don't know the answer. I don't need you to just keep saying it. I need you to help them. That was the first less than I had in supporting other people. Like using the fact that I was GonNa talk any way one way or another but using it in a way that supported other people. That's why it made sense to me when I was on the bathroom floor. My first thought was I gotTA share. I gotTa tell people I have to go talk about. It will now. That's what I get paid to do. A talk on my podcast. I talked from the stage. Talk on radio talk on television. All I do is talk. The only thing I had to do was figure out talk about what but the gift was in speaking. It wasn't fancy we all do it. You know it wasn't something that was just so special. The specialties came in right allowing myself to get passionate about something enough to use my gift. People think that passion is the thing so they'll go. We'll follow your passion in the money will come. We'll know some of you are passionate about things you have no business charging for. I can be passionate about singing but I need to keep that to the shower. Okay at the you would not love me if you heard me saying. I can be passionate about that. But that's not my purpose because my purpose is going to be used to be a blessing to other people if it's only going to be helpful to me or I'm the only one that can benefit. It's not purposeful. It's not needed in the world right so when I allowed myself to accept like look girl. Only thing you got going is that mouth right. You don't have a problem standing up and talking and sharing. That's when everything started to really unfold for me. This second. Wave of having a business in creating America's many Maven. It was giving myself permission to use one of the most basic things but accepting. That's your gift and then allowing it allowing myself to become passionate enough about how I could use it to support. People was the connection for me. I mean so many gems in there like one sentence but it's kind of a through line which I gave myself permission to start doing it right and you also talked about charging what you're worth and again there's permission there right like when you start a podcast when you start talking on Instagram. No one comes over knocks on the door. And we're going to give you permission. You can start now right like never was I have to tell you. I remember when people would ask me. Who like. Who made you America's money may then and I would say I did and they're like what do you mean asset for someone to come crown me like I've done the work? I'm helping people. This is the moniker that I'm going with. This is what I call myself. They're like oh I thought. Steve Harvey Crowns. You know Steve Harvey called me what I already called myself. That's what he did. He got hind what I already said about me for exactly exactly everything you're saying is incredible before keep going listed. Thank our sponsor were all adapting to this changing world. Which means we're going to be buying online more than ever before and if you're an ECOMMERCE seller you can be ready to meet the demands of our new delivery culture with ship station. Even if you're just starting to sell your art on Z or already have a thriving business selling hand-knit scarves ship station makes it easy and affordable to get those orders out quickly save money on shipping costs and keep customers happy. I know you're all such good hearted. People who want to serve others in the highest way possible so definitely recommend you check this out because it's really going to help you get your customers what they really want a need from you. It's the number one choice of online sellers. Which is no surprise considering ship more in less time with the best rates available and for those of you who sell through different platforms like Amazon. Esi or your own website ship station brings all your orders into one simple interface. You can easily manage them from any device even your cell phone and right now. Don't keep your day job. Listeners can try ship station for free for sixty days. When you use our offer code dream job make sure your business ready to meet. The demands of delivery Culture GET STARTED AT SHIP STATION. Dot Com Today. Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in. Dream job. That's ship station. Dot Com than enter. Offer DROP SHIFT STATION DOT COM. Make ship happen. So let's talk about what happens from that point of like this is what I'm passionate about. This is what I think is my gift I'm going in. I'm giving myself permission. And yet people will say the trees. I started talking about stuff on instagram. Or I started whatever and no one's coming or it's not working. How do I go from here to getting noticed? By someone like Steve Harvey or building a business or beginning to be able to come up with an offer. Now that I can charge for like what is that progression. Look like yes so. The first thing that happened is I had to keep talking to that little devil on my shoulder that kept saying who are you. Who Do you think you are like? What do you think this is right and then like I said earlier when my husband and mom when I could tell that they weren't even reading the blog I came up actually stopped for several weeks and there was a man who actually emailed me out of the blue? Who said Hey. I hope you're well. I have been enjoying your blog. And you haven't posted lately and at the time remember. I was new to the online where I was like. Who is this creepy man? I don't where did he come from? How does he know me? What is this? I hadn't learned how to like check comments and read the back in. I only knew how to type my little stuff and post a picture I had. I didn't know anything about it so I went and I saw that people page views and people actually had been reading and that one man I call him my to this day. He taught me. The importance of an audience of one is still an audience. And what we do is we claim to be pass purpose to be passionate in purposeful about something. But then we don't have a audience. We give up quickly the thing with entrepreneurs especially you know we have shiny monkey syndrome and there's always something new is that we will do a million things once and then good upset because we don't get the results that we want. How did I get here consistency? I was calling myself. Money may been showing up. My first speaking gigs were not to ten thousand people. They were so four people in the library. Okay I wrote my own guide for basic personal finances and went to churches in New Orleans no matter where I lived at the time and went around like pitching myself to pastors. Only one person allowed me to do a session and it was a four part session and once the first night there was like ten people then the second Monday the next week those people invited folks in the word got around Church that it was good like thirty. Plus people came on my fourth night. There were like one hundred people and that was the thing that was like you're onto something you're onto something like people get it. They connect to you. But those were my first thing. Speakers speak coaches coach late consultants console. You have to find ways to do the thing until you are able to get paid for it and I'm not saying that you do it for free forever but the way that you really encourage yourself to raise your word is to see the impact that you make bull like the results are in the people so if the people are getting results now. I know I should probably charge more than two hundred dollars to speak. The next phase was five hundred and then it was a thousand and then it was twenty five hundred and it was thirty five hundred and five. Mentana fifteen and then start at fifteen thousand. Gay Guy didn't start at twenty thousand Gig. I started at two hundred a Gig but I serve those people like I was getting two hundred thousand in the thing is if you especially when you're starting but even for me now. I don't care if I walk in some places there's ten people or ten thousand people. I'm going to show up and give the same energy and enthusiasm and passion because guess what. I'm doing what I said I wanted to do. That should be the first thing that gets you fired up. Not How many people and now. How many folks like and how many people comment. That should be the first thing that encourages you to be consistent so beautiful. Wow an audience of one selling audience. Last time I checked. Oh my gosh. Is that so important to hear? Now you were describing in the beginning of this whole episode. What you went in two thousand eight now. A lot of people sitting here are really in a tough spot because we haven't seen what we're seeing now since two thousand eight and you're like hey guys lived through it so for people who are here now especially because the way that you did. The pivot allowed you to build an online business. Allowed you to talk to human beings. What do you have to say to people right? Now who are worried that they won't have a brick and mortar to go back to who very much need to get on the board and Understan- How am I gonNa create something right now like what would you suggest so my suggestion would be definitely to get really clear about what message you want to get out there like. What is the big promise right? You have for other people so the thing that really just supported me at that time was understanding that. I just didn't want people to suffer the way that I was suffering. I just wanted to restore hope so my only thing was how do I provide something that restores? Hope and I use the blog to do that. What is that thing that you want to get out there even if right now just sharing your experience. Can you do that through a blog? Can you do that through youtube? Can you do that through you know your instagram page? Even just having people follow your journey and I actually have to take it back. You're going to have to be vulnerable and be okay with saying that you know stuff is hitting the fan from me right now and I just want to document it and I want to take as many people with me as possible because so many people are suffering but the way that you may be navigating this can be inspiring to others. It could be therapeutic for both parties. You end the audience right so I think creating meaningful content. That's genuine right now. Is going to win. And based on the response of the audience again that audience of one if you have one random man named Joe that comments on everything where Joe's paying points and what does he need right because he has to be the only Beta Tester. You have for your program for your course for your product for whatever that thing is. He's going to be the one that would give you the feedback but I would say another thing. Honestly it's kind of like giving yourself permission it but it's actually looking at this time as a gift opportunity and I know that that is really hard when stuff is hitting the fan and you're like this is nuts but if you can embrace that a little sooner quicker faster you will give yourself the empowerment to get creative and figure it out and like find a way to figure it out the longer you stay stuck in like this sucks like my whole life my this my that and you stay in the mode of like whining and complaining because at the end of the day this is another moment in time where we all have to surrender so we have to surrender and see what the possibilities are for. What's next right and I know for me? At the time that everything hit the fan I had a great life. I was living very well. We drove matching ranger overseas. We lived in a six thousand square foot home in southern cal. Like I was eating good traveling. Good you couldn't have told me that going through that experience would bring me to who I am today. I wouldn't let go. I would've stayed wound up in no. Why me why me why me instead of finally releasing goint got. Tell me something what would can this mean. What are the opportunities here? Because this could be a blessing or lessen it doesn't have to be the worst thing that ever happened to me. Once I shifted that mindset the world opened up and I think there's another opportunity and I'm uncomfortable in some places right. A lot of my income is from speaking. But guess what I started to do. I change the tags on my website. I'm our virtual keynote speaker already. Got Booked Right. That wasn't a thing for me two months ago but now it is and now there's so much opportunity. So how do we keep reimagining? What's possible for us as opposed to staying in this attachment to what what was because we don't know if things are going to go back just to normal so you can't hold onto that you can see it as an opportunity to stretch and grow and get out of your comfort zone and possibly discover a new version of yourself that you might be quite pleased with you. Just don't know yet. Yeah I have a question. Because we haven't even covered at your. You have so much in your journey. That's so incredible that we didn't even cover the before right before you had this incredibly successful business at twenty five living in a six thousand square foot house driving matching range rovers. You correct me if I'm wrong but you didn't grow up that way girl. I think that you said you grew up in south central or did you not tell me that I did tell you that I grew up in an area called Lamar Park in south central Los Angeles right. So how on Earth did you change your relationship to money and possibility so drastically? I grew up in south central. Like you said in a neighborhood infested would gang violence drive-by shootings prostitution and drug use. Like you name it. I saw out the window. I lived above a storefront on a mainstream in. La and literally. There was a bus stop right across the street and my grandma and I saw boy his head blown off and I was like in third grade so I knew really young. I used to say I don't belong here. That's what I used to tell my mom and my grandma now as an adult now with the child I look back and I'm like that was really rude. I was probably. They probably thought I was nuts. But I used to say I don't belong here. I don't belong here and I think I was born with a strong sense of purpose. Even though I wasn't around people that can cultivate it. I just always wanted more and the fact that I was verbally and emotionally traumatized the bid and my home and Al really made me go in a lot. I really was big on self awareness even as a little kid like. How am I showing up? Does it look? It was true like self reflection like I was very in tune with like how people were perceiving me or perceiving things. I just always carried that with me and I'm just really grateful. What helped was teachers. Along the way parents of other friends along the way in I as a parent. Now it's really important to me to encourage my daughters friends even just do little things like. Oh you're so cute liquid shoe you're flat 'cause you really know what they're thinking about themselves and what conversations in new me as a child because I was smart people assume that I was. Okay yeah the time because I could show up and do the spelling bee. They didn't know how uncomfortable I really was with people looking at me. I was more comfortable with. I knew that I could compete. You know and be good at something so it was the people who came in my life along the way I didn't know to call them mentors or anything like that but Mrs Linton First Grade Teacher. She planted the seed in me. That when I know something I help people will ask who I am today. Right at thirty nine years old. That's what I do today. That gives me chills up. Yeah when I look at different teachers not all of them because some of them added to the when I look at different teachers along my path when I look at folks from Church along my path who spoke life into me it is that reminder that we have the ability to speak life and it can change anything and had it not been for those people who were Gina strategically placed throughout my life. I don't know that I would be here. But those people have served as angels in many forms and capacities and they just really cultivated. This idea that I could do anything. And once I got over this Hump Mentally of what I looked like and being ashamed of all these things things really took off for me much differently because I started to see myself the way I believe God sees me is in his image and once I started to feel that and really lean more into the what is meaning for me. That's what the Bible says about what is possible in the charge to be bold be courageous and to fear not you know and all these things and bright when I started to lean into that versus the what ifs which are all fear in all the noise and all the things that other people try to plan. It's not that it's not there because I don't consider myself fearless a half year in a move instead. Move with it and like I said I just keep showing up consistently and I feel that. I'm just attracted the most amazing people folks like you who will say I don't know I just don't upon you and here we are but I'm like I know I only know all day. I know that this was strategic in. This happens over and over again but I also think it comes from a strong faith practice in trying to like put out there that things that I want to come back while my God thought so you know. No wonder you're paid to speak. People should give you any amount of money. Because it's it's how you speak but it's what you speak and it's it's just so incredible to hear your story and the way that you see the world and I love what you just said about not buying into all those spinning fears and instead what you've done is been like okay. Well I'm going to trust that. The creator of the world sees me in this beautiful way but that also leads to trusting other things right like I think a lot of people in this time feel like Oh my God. There's no clients available. There's no people. There's no money there and I'm like how start from the place of there's so many people to serve and they're so much money there because the world is abundant it really is look at the rainforest. It's abundant look at the ocean. It's abundant look at love. It's abundant money. It's abundant right. Human serve abundant got in trouble with some folks when the pandemic I started because people were dropping in my deanza saying how can I possibly charge people and were in the middle of a right right. And what did you say I said? Everybody is not struggling. We might all be at home but to have this mindset that everybody struggling not going to stop you from being able. Here's the thing you have a responsibility to serve right. If you know how you can keep somebody from suffering. There are literally people who are not sleeping at night because you're their solution in there waiting for you to step up and show up and show out and shine so that they can see you and finally get the result that they're looking for and here you are hiding. They need you now more than ever. You know if you want to change up your payment plan cool if you want to find a way to tweak. This longer course could be shorter. You can charge less cool but to not show up service to people in. You should be ashamed because it's an insult you're leaving people in pain and you're insulting the very guy that gave you the gift the story and whatever it is you're supposed to be using to be a blessing and it's a shame amen so true wow is does. Doesn't that just put it all in perspective? Last thing is we've touched on it a little bit but I think even when people give themselves permission to start to serve and give even when people start to give themselves permission to test things out and to show up and to learn that they are needed by doing the speech at the Library by coaching. Just to coach when the rubber meets the road and they now know they are good at this when they now know that they do serve mission with this work still charging for it is a whole nother on that ladder which is very hard for people and you really are great. Being like this is it. This is what you charge and you can keep raising your rates and what I see. In general as most people could be making so much more if they were just raised the rates rate like why not charge more like don't sell price sell value right because it has to be hard. That goes back to that hustling. Grime mentality in the beginning right. It's like oh I gotta get one hundred people to do the thing or you can raise your price with ten. That's literally the choice. What is this exact? She just rip the band aid off. And just put your price out and you'll be surprised what people say well. Here's what I really believe. I believe that there is no transformation without transaction and so it's not about repeating the band aid off. I think you need to stop putting a band aid on both right putting a band aid on these problems. That are like bleeding problems. They are probably again really hurting really in pain. Really in some type of hell and when you don't charge what you're supposed to charge in Bay can't take it seriously enough to do the work then. They don't transform and so. Do you want to be someone who adds a band aid or do you want to perform surgery right if? I'm lying in the middle of the street bleeding. I'M NOT GONNA ask the person who runs. That says I'm a doctor. I'm not going to be like hold up. What school did you go to wait a minute? How much did you help me in the street gonNA GONNA cost me? I gotta think about it and like right. We think people are thinking about how we sir or what we offer. People are not really thinking about that. They want the results. They want the better marriage. They want the better body. They want better finances. They want their home to be clutter free because they know how that is going to impact everything else like they want the being. They're not concerned about all the things that we make it about all. I don't have enough degrees in that. I need to get certify. I need six more coaching certifications. Before I can or I'm only going to be able to charge two dollars or no now. That's not true. If you truly have a desire to transform people the transaction has to be significant enough for them to take it seriously. Yep every single thing you said I just WanNa hear it on. Repeat because all of it is the best. You're you are the best. I can't wait for this audience to know you. If they had it no new yet tell them where they can find more of you all the beautiful light and truth that you put in the world so everything portrays Washington can be found at Patrice Loko Dot Com. Of course the PODCAST is redefining wealthy. You can find it anywhere you listen to. I'm sure this podcast and my favorite social media hang out has been instagram. That's where I show up the most in. Dm's answer people's questions. I would love for you to meet me. There seek wisdom. Pccw THAT SEEK WISDOM PC. W We will put all of that in the show notes and you are an absolute gift. Thank you so much thank you. You're so incredible Cathy. I Adore you. Thank you so much. Oh my God. Patrice is incredible here. Are the takeaways number one. It's not about chasing money. It's about seeking wisdom number. Two wealth is not about material possessions and money alone. Wealth is a condition of wellbeing number. Three your business will only grow to the extent that you were willing to heal your trauma number four. Give yourself permission to embrace your gifts. You don't have to go searching for it forever and ever number five audience one is still an audience number six render to this moment and see what possibilities our next. Look at this time as a gift and opportunity to stretch out of your comfort zone and discover a new version of yourself number seven we have the ability to speak life and it can change anything and number eight. You have responsibility to serve. There are people who aren't sleeping at night because you are their solution. They need you now more than ever. Thank you guys so much for being here. Thank you so much for listening. I know that there's a million things you could be doing with your time. It means the world. I'm so grateful that you're here. And if you want to jump in on the five day doing starts today. It's free go to Cathy. How're DOT COM SLASH CHALLENGE OR KATHY DOT com slash? Here for this either way you will get to sign up it. Starting today. I'll be live at noon Pacific. If you can't be there with us live we will send you the replay cafe AU dot com slash challenge or caffeine dot com slash. Here for this whichever. One will get you there and I would love to be spending this time with you and do you feel like the show is changing your life or adding something to your life. That's positive if so can you think of one person right now? Who could benefit from this episode? Can you think of one person who needs to hear? Patrice or who needs to hear this show? So please share the episode. It really is helping more than you know. We have moved up the chart to number twenty nine because you guys are tagging and sharing and subscribing it is literally helping other people find this show and it means everything and it doesn't cost you so. I'm going to be doing to incredible giveaways every single month. I'll be giving to people scholarship to my program plus some awesome. Swag we have these adorable hoodies. Say Heart of a hero and these mugs said that say. Let your colors shine? All you have to do is star which stands for subscribe tag reviews of subscribed the show wherever you listen. It's free talk about the show on instagram and tag a friend than leaving review in. Take a screen. Shot an email review to hello it. Don't keep your day job with the subject line star and will enter you into that and we'll be choosing to of you every month and I would say those are pretty good giveaways. It costs you like three minutes to enter and it changes the whole game for us. A thank you to everyone. Who's been doing that? You guys are the best. I hope to see you for the spicy experience. You can go to Cathy. How'RE DOT COM SLASH? Here for this and you can join us. This is going to be amazing and I will see you real soon. Elite you the song of mine and I'll talk to you on Thursday for the next episode or I'll see you in the five experience. The podcast is a production of authentic for more INFO on advertising in this show visit authentic shows dot com jazz. Can't save your shave. I'll be here Long I'll be here for you for you. People on the planet if had much planned it doesn't get a count on me. You down you will come there for me and hold man. I can't see for me off planet much could and doesn't Gab Cam have far you count on me? ask a eight cancelled thing.

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