Murder Bang Show Pilot

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Hey Street people we are going to have a new segment craigslist dating game and today are contested. Is Tiffany tiffany. Please tell us where you're from. I'm from originally bullard alert. Texas don't even know where that is. How old are you? I'm twenty nine. That's my story I'm sticking to it. Tiffany's little twenty nine year old. Living living in Texas hobbies are figure skating on ice fishing. She's a professional figure skater and she likes fishing and Tiffany. What's your sign? The contestants on no and cancer shoes cancer is I know. That sounds bad. Doesn't it well. Thank you for joining us. Tiffany we have got to get started on your options. Your Bachelor number one is going to be read to us by Brandy. Go on on Brandy Bachelor. One is very serious. She loves her man. But she's tired of missionary. She just wants to say once again that she loves her man but she's getting bored of the same old sex so tell her what you're into. What are your fantasies the more kinky and crazy and dirty the more likely you're going to Pique her interest? ooh ooh she sounds Nice when you think tiffany yeah. I'll put some handcuffs on your girlfriend. Let them watch from closet. Superman outfit the next bachelor is looking to chat with a female. That's you so. Is there anyone who can squirt please let him know his wife. Mellon is forty and very athletic. Oh is there a fixer. Her quarter. I don't know I mean I don't think cell it's never happened. One also heard that it's like actually just king whatever whatever makes you happy. Yeah it makes you feel good about it. Then yes that's exactly what happens so bachelor number three. He's a muscular athlete in he'll will be hanging in Gateway Park all week with a bubble button. And he's looking for a big beautiful Cox. So hopefully that's you he'll be cruising the woods. That's the next guy for you in case you're interested in hanging out in the woods and have a big beautiful car. I don't think I have the right equipment but I can go to the store. Keep him in mind. Keep the mind you have one. Last option here females only so that's perfect and he is down for muddy road travel. He's experienced in the back door and he has nice average sized penises and he's not interested in the men kind of up your alley if you know what I mean. Yeah I mean like he's saying like he's like good with money travel than like. I know that so tiffany. You have a woman who's interested in something a little bit crazy a little bit more fun and Kinky you have a gentleman gentleman and he wants a lady who can squirt. You've got a muscular athlete. Who loves the outdoors? We'll be in the woods all week long and you like the next men. He's interested in muddying. So who you GONNA go with one to three or four. Maybe the lady she sounds like the safest bet you feel like. That's the least chance I have of being murder. Yeah Yeah I mean I fall in the woods negative. And how do you feel about anal. 'CAUSE that'll eliminate number four. Yeah I mean I mean I would need some drugs and some cane so I mean like if you don't come with that like don't even approach me if they did come with that we'd be like when you're not aware like whatever so I'm GonNa be fine. Okay so you're thinking about going with the lady then yeah. I think that'd be fun. I've I've always had like girl. Crushes in stuff can also don't even know like how much like I'd be. Okay with actually going down. I feel like it might smell. Yeah it doesn't smell like mine and I'm like there's some wrong some days you're like don't go near it. It's just casting as you're sitting down and you're like what the Fuck Shit that me. Yes very risky. Game being a lesbian I know but I mean like you know but you're down and so on behalf of comically anxious. We're going to not send you on any vacation because we've got no money but we can give you her craigslist information Yeah Gosh thank you for playing the craigslist game. I really feel like Rapunzel will put some music there so I think you should sing it. Stymie on Craig's list do your laundry.

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