Episode 191 - Conversation with Mylie - Your Words & Thoughts Matter
Welcome family teachers, a podcast or anyone who wants to experience healthy relationships within their family. This is Doctor Cory. Gilbert and I'm honored to come alongside you to encourage educate and equip you as he focused on the different relationships Mikus family. Let's get started and focus on today's teacher. Hey welcome to. The family features five gases stopped. Corey Gilbert here's my daughter Miley. How and we are having another conversation about something from this books? Give my my daughter and my wife went through called lies. Girls believe. Them free. By Dan, Dan Gresh On the link will be in the show notes as well. But we're looking at truth number eighteen and you picked this one and the truth is what bring much all of them best. Everybody speak in every that you think about. Someone should please God every word you speak. And every thought so worth to what I say and what I think. She'd be appeasing. God, have you should make odd smile? Is it. Now No. Remember our conversation before this with mom. What did she say? She says I don't speak a lot. But I have things in my head. Keep to myself and like you said an robot you. Would I say about this that? It's kind of hard for me since for. Much else we can set the bar high. We use a lot of words. Pleasing God all the time and the answer is no, and so we understanding that really important. This is a really scary statistics or or or From the studies that they talk almost half of girls who took our survey. Say, they have been bullied. Is probably much higher than that in other surveys, and then they said that twenty nine percent of girls say they have been the bully, or they stood by and let happen. Let. It happen without doing anything to stop it. And so, what's the lie? The lie is that it is okay to be mean. Is Not it is not okay I mean. It's crazy as you have the potential, you mean. I had you mean and you? We all have potential you mean. We have we have it in us. So. How to not how do we steward that? How can I TAME my tongue? How can I not be mean? I. Just don't. Simple help. What is what is it that? Meeting the Bible maybe don't so. Would I put in my head? Putting in stories like a lot of the books I read. They're actually paint a picture of a mean girl. Pretends to make you more likely responding like a mean girl right I'm thinking about on the Pegasus series. I read in the first book the girls about, Emily. She had to decide if she would sack. As she that sacrificed her life to. Save the Olympians, but then she actually just grab power arrived first. She had to decide what she sacrifice myself to help. People are not so. In, thinking, that might be a good example. Go and so that's the kind of stuff you read. If you read stuff that actually was really negative, you will become more negative. And then also someone that helps during the book Joe. He actually had been a bully, but he was also a informed. He'd grown Night, also I'm within a foster fan, if I eight other kids though. so He'd be He'd really been hurt probably a lot. and. It's interesting how people that are hurt a lot. Don't tend to initially come away from that. And have learned from that, so they don't hurt people. They actually tend to hurt people. And the saying is hurt. People hurt people. Hurt I'm more likely to hurt others. And so this here, the Lai, it's okay to be mean. No. It's not yeah, but it might be a default for so many of us. That's like a setting in our brain. We just arse. We're set to be more selfish. And to be more. Protective to blame lots of different words, we could put their means another one. Just really scary. What does it talk about here? It says I think being mean is worse than ever for one thing. Girls use mean girl talk to greet each other. When they want to agree to good friend. That scene for a while. They might say something like what's up ugly. You don't get that. That's hopefully you haven't really experienced that much guys are really bad at too. But. The statement says I can't even stop the madness and we need to stop doing that. Certain things like that. That are culturally okay. So our friends do it. We need to kind of go guys. Maybe, we don't need to talk that way about each other like what's up ugly. Like connects people think they mean by. You're actually trying to be like funding exactly and actually. That's some of the funny that we are. Actually would if a person really thinks ugly? And then I go. What's up ugly? They don't take it lightly. I was saying lightly. But? They're gonNA. Take it like all. They think I'm ugly. Maybe I really am ugly. That makes sense. So you don't know what they're. What's going on in their head? I. Don't know what's going on in yours as a parent that scares me. 'cause as a parent I can't fix it. I can't make it right I can't. New Make. You think right so. Getting every word you speak. Every thought you think. About someone should please God. You can't stop yourself from. Stop me from. Out She. Lets trail. So where are we going with this? This is really important state. Go to the next page. The truth negatives looking to look at that quick may the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you. Lord my rock and redeem or Psalm nineteen fourteen. So we have a truth nugget there, which is what talked, calls it here in this book. That's really important that I have a command from goddess who I'm supposed to be. And I feel time. And thanking place your talks a lot. He might sometimes trying be funny like as it says in the book, but he might not notice that he's actually being really mean. So, that saying he meet like as you guys say, he needs to learn, the boundary wrote. In Talk Sierra about James, three so the book of James In the Bible chapter three is about naming our tongues. It says that people have tamed all kinds of wild animals, birds, reptiles, and sea creatures, but no one. The tongue rice except God and Jesus Spiridon Yeah. So. We need to learn. That's why this is important in psalms may the words of my mouth? So I say and the meditation of my heart. Be Pleasing to you. Oh Lord, my rock and redeemer a so important for us. It's something that I'm I'm in my forties and learning. And ironically when I was your age saying thing, mom and Dad. Got On my case for using words inappropriately or being mean or things like that and so same for you, but it's growing always learning right. Next fixture, Kennel looks like Nina Way. White with red hair. Yup Toys any other important information. We should learn from this. Look at your list, so she made a list to keyword outline. We call it in the first point was truth or the first title? Your words in your thoughts matter the Lai. It's okay to be mean that's not okay. What else did you right? We should be smart and think before we talk, so we should be smart and things before talk. That's a hard one especially for someone who has a lot of words to get out. Talk A lot, so you change the subject before I have the time to put in like I should put it in. That's true and it's an. CHANCE TO SPEAK? Because we. have to limit. Let you talk sometimes, but what do you what position you put yourself in when you're trying to speak? Area the. upgrading Do this I don't? Know so you actually has been neat to see over the last few years. You do that, we. We know she's waiting to. Others like kids are taught to do this on the parents shirt or something like that, so the way that you stand at attention like that's actually really neat, set or sit and we. Sometimes ignore. Times. Because we're also not perfect to. Discuss probably to actually do this. which is sometimes, it's tiring. I I want to occupy care about saying it so. Yes, but we should be smart and think before we talk so that means we need to actually. Thought through it to actually have changed where we're. GonNa, say to something that's a little more thought through, and then your next one says. That child is that mean listen for me? Thoughts like sell We need a listen like know trying. Catch me. Mean God's thinking in this. Get rid of them so if you think. I hate my brother. I should say wait I. Actually Love my brother, I just don't like him. Is True, but no one ever really. The way you said that was really neat the way so that was really neat. But you can be really ticked off with him and still go but I still love him. So it's very important for all relationships. You can still love someone disagree I. Think I've. on chapter four how it says. That how if you can't love your brother and sister who you can see? How can you love? God, who you have not seen so important. Good good recall. There that thing I really liked. So important. So, say that again. If you, how can you love your? How can you love your brothers and or sister? Shanti. If you can't love God who you cannot see so important to sit there and you think on that. Like some people say they're brother and sister and they might think they do but. They actually think through the Really do care. And they can care in hate with their roller sister doing. I can hate it when. They're acting mean. We actually can we re remind you guys stop using the word hate even that that's almost a little too harsh. I don't like like I. Don't like it when they do this. In safe that word hate for something much stronger. That we actually need to be careful with which is really important. So listen for mean thoughts means there are things in my head. that. Goes there without me choosing? So! How can I? Grab that and take every thought captive like it might be like a part of your brain. That doesn't like what they're doing is like. Tell this to them. Just pushes it our consciousness with a good picture. I love that. The part that cares is like wait I need to get her to get this out and I love the. That's a good picture. Smart left. That's really cool. Yeah, so you listen to the mean thoughts and you go no. You tell them go away. Or you're not true. I believe this. And as you do that, you're taking every thought captive in your actually being in charge strengthening your love for God me and you are absolutely and others, and then your last point here was trying find sneaky snake messages and push them out. What in the world is a sneaky snake message rally in the First Sean stuff we've been watching the called Satan this Niki snake and said sneaky sneak messages are messages that are not true. State messages or not true. So we need to actually pay attention to. There are little little stories, a plan my head, but tell me something about myself that like how I look or how my voice sounds or my eyes for my nose or my hair. I! Like. Full. You wanted to get your hair cut short, and then you wanted it straight. chained straight by I. Don't allow like funny 'cause. That's that that's very normal. A lot of girls at curly hair want straight here and if they have straight here, they want curly hair. One color one another. I like my hair colors I discount. Decide if I want straight or curly hair. Well guess what got already decided for you. It's kind of cool and you know what. I? Think those freckles all need to go. and find within good. But was crazy is if you had been? If there's this party, that's really like my freckles than you. would. That moment gone? Maybe right. Inside your head. Struggle 'cause there's always interactions with family with friends everywhere where people have opinions or just say something funny. And they're actually being mean even if they didn't mean to be mean. and. Try and find sneaky snake messages in push them out, and this is back to that verse Psalm, Nineteen Fourteen, may the words of my mouth. and Meditation of my heart be pleasing to you. Oh Lord, my rock and redeemer some. Middle Word of mouth and meditation in my heart, and so that's the meditation. My heart is so what on reading when I'm putting in my? My head. So the time the Bible, the time in worship, those terms I listen to books, everything movies. TV shows so that's really important. Police are really good I like this. Yeah, so we're going to recap real quick. We have the truth is what? Your words and thoughts natter yes, and then the Lai. It's okay to be new Katie me. No, it's not than the tactics. We should be smart and think before we talk so hard. Listen for me. And try and find sneaky snake messages. Get rid of them Yup. Push them out the love at sill. Go Away! That's not true. That's right. Talk to yourself. Be Crazy. Yup, and walk. She always talking to herself Sentence talking to yourself in right, so we need to tell ourselves that's true. That's not true in the filter is God's word. God's say about us. Not, my parents not my friends, no one else. Has got to say about US he adores us. So even apparent who adores children is not even compare. There's nothing. Signing close to how much God loves us. Like Howie like the food we eat. Something far like. So much, sir, that's true we're not. Thankful for all of us. Thanks for coming on the podcast today. Like our here. Yeah, thanks for coming on the PODCAST. Always always. Exciting. Thank you tuning in to the family features podcast. It has been an honor to serve find out more about Dr Gilbert and his resources for you and your family's growth and success at healing lives dot com. And if you think could use support along the way, be sure to book that call. Book. Dr Jean Dot Com and one more thing. You found this helpful. Please share this podcast of others so that we can change the world together.