Hot and Heavy and Casual Relationships! Why they FIZZLE Out So Fast! | Write Your Legend Podcast with Apollonia Ponti
I'm Polonia want the and welcome to the right your legend podcasts for daily motivation inspiration and advice about life dating and relationships. I believe we're all here to writer legend and my definition of writing your legend is someone who embodies greatness who prevails in the hard times does right for the world in constantly pushes themselves to embody happiness and success personally and professionally. I commit to supporting you every step of the way. So, let's write your legend and began. Hot In heavy relationships falling too fast and a why this fizzles out as fast as it starts typically I know hot and heavy relationships can be a whirlwind of experiences because of the fact that it has a such an endorphin rush, but then it just leaves so hurt and confused when that person is not there anymore typically they leave just as fast as they came. So let's get into why this may happen as well. So why hot and heavy relationships happen are typically a couple of reasons number one is because we are running away and we're doing circles around the things the deeper work that needs to be within US right. So typically, it's kind of like this where we. Have maybe cut that needs to as we nor the stitches and we continue to put this band on top of and then the band aid falls off and then we get another and continue to put it on top of it but the the scar never heals because it might need stitches. Right. which is repair and a lot of times people go into relationships because they're trying to run away from something else from something of a feeling or emotion or hurt or pain or loss even, and the moment we get that establishment of closeness or that establishment of classes that be goes on beyond the superficial physical element in these relationships. Then what happens is the person disappears because it gets serious and this is something that happens often to people also that are very codependent. That maybe you haven't had a lot of experiences and relationships as well, and I think that with US knowing that hot and heavy relationships do come at a price and if you find yourself constantly getting hot and heavy relationships or you're the person that is hot and heavy, I would really encourage you to turn around that microscope and look from within and what's going on here within you and one of the reasons why I say that is because when we tend to. Run Away we continue to lose ourselves more and more in every relationship where we just can hit rock bottom and get very depressed or confused, and in this hot and heavy relationships risen why this happens and a lot of times with women in general why this happens is because women. Want that field they long no matter what women long for feeling just like men too. I. Think of wanting to be wanted wanting to feel -nificant in some way of their beauty. And typically this comes in a physical round. So in hot and heavy relationships, you might have the best sex ever and people are like Oh they mistake this for connection guys. This is not connection. Best sex ever does not mean connection. This is where we have to get. Really. Direct in. Love and relationships and teaching what loving relationship says because. A lot of times in society and what how we've been custom to is to understand that Oh if I have the best sex with this woman, this means that she's the one, but it's not the truth. It means that what other qualities issue offering in life for herself and for you what are her standards? What are the values that you? And is this a healthy dynamic? The both of you have, there's more to it than that. Typically, the most unhealthy relationships do have the best sex and this is because of the endorphins hot and cold, the the the good times and the bad times because it's never that medium right? It's always it's on a great great high or it's on a great great low, and this is what happens in passionate lustful relationships have actually write a blog about this is called less verse love and I'll put it below in the. Description box you guys can read that as well after this video. Now, next thing in the reasons why we get hot and heavy relationships and they fizzle way fast is because in these hot and heavy relationships were not talking about what we want. We're not talking about our wants desires. We're not talking about commitment sometimes in these relationships are mentality goes it's going so good that I don't want to mess it up. So what we've done is we thrown our voice out the window and we said the hell with it. It's just going so good. So why would I mess it up? So when someone tells me that there's no voidance that's happening here and typically avoidance comes from. Really intuition intuitively feel like Oh, this person probably isn't ready to commit and just continue to show up and do whatever they want on their time and not really talk about the future or commitment after these you know out and it's not about like talking about we gotta get in a relationship I want to be in a relationship with you. It's a really about just talking about their ideas of. Commitment, like, are they really looking for fine? You know things like that and just understanding how they articulate this in their language guys in women that may be watching guys in the audience. So they typically speak to women that ready for a relationship we'll tell you through their language, their dialogue there conversations no matter what and as long as you don't expect any come from abundance which I talk about significantly. Video. This is a really good mindset to have. So you can think clearly and not get blinded by these type of relationships because a lot of times when we get in hot and heavy relationships because both of us somewhat are emotionally avoidance were emotionally unavailable emotionally avoided meaning one side of the person with a hot and heavy relationship that ends up typically running away is the one that doesn't want to get emotionally involved and. Then the other one wants to have love all wants to have be seen wants to be in this relationship and sometimes has inherited codependence codependent behaviors and there's a lack of self worth there's a lack of integrity. There's lack maybe of even self esteem or confidence within you when it comes to dealing now doesn't mean that you're not confident in the gym or work and you bring home a great salary whatever and then. Your relationships, you're like, why the hell can I get this right? It's completely different. Everything in life needs to be trained as a muscle are learning capability our relationships with our family. Our work working skills are speaking skills, whatever we must do. Our relationships are love dating our self worth ourselves. Love our integrity everything requires work in. These are all principal elements, different elements and I actually talk about this break free codependency product. I talk about this and I also teach you how to do this and start to implement them today I would encourage you to download that product is we'd below in the description box you have full access to me every month where it's part of my VIP program where you actually go in there twice a month, not even once a month anymore and do live coaching calls with you guys, coach you on the spot. Put that blow on this description box if you are interested which he should be. Now. You'll notice in these relationships to that passion is really at the forefront of this relationship and we blindly get this misconstrued with maybe we're falling in love with this person or maybe this is the one for me and we have to really take burs view when it comes to dating because it's our responsibility to let in the people that we want to date because at the end of the day, you can't blame that other person for basically doing what they did in new falling in. Love. With them or falling and desire for them because you had a responsibility to play here and that's why say victim mentality will always set you back. Relationships are about lessons. So it's about taking a bird's eye view and saying, okay, I try these type of women all the time or attract these type of relationships all the time. What am I doing wrong how am I not showing up for my bestself in typically in the relationships like this kindness is not at the forefront meaning kindness of compassion or Acts of excuse, me acts of service and access service means like they do things for you. They go out of their way they might do. They would do things for you and show you commitment and access services not telling you. Oh, you look good. Let's do dinner I. Appreciate Your Love Spending Time with you. That is not act service as a service is really doing things where it's not selfish for them where it's actually for the other person that's what access services, and this is when you know someone is really wide it ready to invest in you and these relationships you won't see that very often. And then lastly, I want to finish it up with this. Now, it's not only our responsibility to understand why we get into hot and heavy relationships, but also our responsibility to encourage you my responsibility I should say to encourage you that if you are a man that gets in these relationships, I encourage you. To really have a discussion with a girl and put a brake, put the brakes on and pace yourself in the beginning and take it one step at a time. When you get in these relationships if this is something, you WanNa solve with today and you're ready I encourage you to download my product. It's called my break free of codependency product click below watch a video and sign up. I will see you there and as always I'll see you in the next video remember are always left by for now. If you enjoy this podcast before to subscribe rate and review this podcast and share with your friends, congratulations to writing your legend and thanks so much for listening today and I'll talk to you soon in the next episode.