Black Women Can Never Not See Color
They do all right guys. Nettleton and I are back with another episode of shades of strong. I know we've missed what Natalie may be two three weeks a week. 'cause you know life happened in but we're back. I have another death in the family in Canada. Sokoto on me day. Nadal has some things going on as well so but anyway we are finally back with episode episode twenty three. We appreciate you guys waiting one. Is I know how we get down. We'll talk about all the beings shape making sometimes break the stone platform so Nadal and say hey to the world people yet we miss jaw. We did we we. We missed coming together. In you know talking I missed you. Girl I've missed coming together talking to you because this is therapeutic for me and NATOLIN. It gives us a chance to catch up with these other sudden misdoings. Feel like you've missed me through. I definitely did. The feeling is definitely mutual. I enjoy talking every week. And even if we don't get a chance to do any other talking outside of recording these episodes I I definitely reports would be sad these episodes to record so I guess 'cause we talk about other stuff. People behave coalition. Yeah yeah the yeah that's true. That's real yeah it. Is it definite so anyway? We'll we want to talk about. Tonight's was or I always say tonight. I don't know what I do that only we report at night. You go but what I want to talk about. Is I received this? I received a message in my inbox was asking me why shades of strong was created specifically for Black Women and addressed it pays address it on the podcast Wail. And just Kinda give natty becoming. We'll talk about why we need to do. And why the message is important. Four black women when I first created Shays a strong or originally. It was getting a lot when when it was dropped at my spirit. I was afraid to specify that it was for black women because I did not want to contribute to the divisiveness that our country right now and so I felt like say it specifically for Black Women would be would be contributing to that so I was reluctant about doing it but as I continue to think about my individual struggle and Dan struggles of my sisters my friends in Thal astronaut length. The same in it. We'RE GONNA. We're being completely honest. I think we can say that everything that was created for all women was created with black. You might need to repeat that little pat because people don't seem to get it it was not. I mean okay so I'm GONNA say it again. But if people in the back everything that was created for all women would never eighty were black women in mind when you think about marketing. You're not gonNA see are faces. I mean getting better with it now but now you I mean now now like yesterday now writes has decade last couple. Es I was not going to see are faces plastered across their marketing materials and bring Riano when she created this makeup line. That was for all shades. I think about Mac I can remember going to make up for makeup and may only had one color that was specifically for black women and they sold same color set everybody and it was n w forty five every black person. I don't care what shade of dark skiing were. You got end up before because the because like I said everything that was created for all women was not created with us in Moscow. Just recently had they started gotta can't even think of any makeup lines. Laurie Ale maybelline. But now you see them trying to match everybody's shake Or they just recently started doing that. So a multi. Everything was created for all win was not created with black women admires so I don't feel guilty. I no longer feel guilty saying that. Shades of strong was specifically created for black women because less has been one hundred dollars struggles are not the same. Our our white counterparts did not grow up like we grew up. Our experiences are realities are not the same. So I created this platform so that we can have a safe space where we can talk about our individual and collective struggles and feel safe doing that without the judgment and criticism from people on the outside alphabet about you know what. I'm sure I don't I mean. People are so quick to say that we all bleed. I get we do and I say this. Say This on my facebook page to we all do bleed rid but my but my blood is season with the pain and the struggle of my ancestors and with a with that of every black woman who dares to have a voice. Okay because we be honest when we do we speak up about. The indifference is ending injustices will automatically labeled we ridiculed persecuted. So can we just not pretend like light? Racism doesn't exist because it does that we are judged based solely because of the color. Basking is so you try to get mean or convince me to erase my color or not to speak about my colored than what I feel like. You're doing you're trying to get me to erase my story because my color is a part of my store. So I'M GONNA keep talking about and I'm GonNa keep saying that shows a strong we talk about all the things that shape mate and sometimes break the strong black woman. Because if you've never walk in my shoes if you've never been a black woman you can't tell me what it's like to be black because I live this every day. You don't have to in the stores in people following behind you. You know because you went in a store that black people don't typically shopping so now you be a profile you have to. You don't have to deal were back. So that's why I create space. An ESA I know the person that sent it to me. I mean it was a black but you know even as like people To this not exclude like they exclude us and not necessarily excluded anybody. I welcome open dialogue from anybody. That's not the same color that I am but this space was specifically created with the black woman in my natty. Oh say a lot. I miss trying to remember that. We have timed recording here. And I can't just go off But I first of all I one hundred percent agree with everything such first of all. Let me just suggest like and said that this was this was someone who is black. Brought this up and I'm not here to criticize anybody or anything like that. I I get I get it but there are conversations like this within my position on this though is there are certain things like you said you know about creating a safe space. There are certain things that I no longer feel comfortable talking about a mixed company. What I mean by that is bear certain things that I that caused the pain of costly harm that I know that if I don't talk about it with other black women I am not going to get the support that I need. My needs will not be met. I will not be listened to will not be heard. I will only be guessed lighted and that something that I'm not willing to put up with any any more. I'm just getting too old for it and I'm not old but I'm getting too old for a been dealing with that my entire life and it speaks to what you were saying about how we had certain experiences and certain things that we've been through that other people don't go through you said. You you don't you. You go to store and once following you. I'm dealing with micro for people who aren't black every day every day. This is not an exaggeration again. So this you know like usually if you're gonna say something like that again in the company you're GonNa get met with gas lighting. Oh absolu- I'm sure that's not what's really going on our. Oh I don't believe that for a minute it doesn't really matter what you believe It what matters is. I know exactly what I'm serious and not looking through it through some sort of lens of bitterness or anger or or unresolved whatever whatever know. What a micro aggression is and I experience it every day and that's not something that I'm willing to talk about with someone who isn't a black woman now if you're someone who is a person of color and yes you also go through certain things. Maybe but I have to really know you also if you are a white woman and I know that you go through things too because you're a woman. I still have to know you at a certain level before I feel safe talking about any of that in so there needs to be a place where we can talk with each other and address these things so that we can feel heard and supported and I also find it from China's technical here. I also find it a little annoying that this seems to be brought up with black people in general all the time. When you find out you have a child that has WHO's neuro divergent or has high anxiety or something like that and you find the support of that no one asked. Well how can you feel it much? Combo is dealing with extreme anxiety. Depression like they've been diagnosed or whatever or they're just really afraid or they've got this issue or that issue and I'm not trying to. I'm not trying to buy blackface some sort of issue but there are certain things that we look at and we see them as holidays really aren't apologies is just something that someone is going through or something. That is part of that person's experience and we don't ever look at these other groups different groups of people and say how come you don't include everybody. It's always just us. It's like well how come it's not everybody. It's like dude. If I'm seeing black lives matter I'm not saying black lives matter. No one else's life matters. That's not what I'm saying. All I'm seeing is black lives matter also because you'll really have been living and breathing and walking through this earth or however long pretending that allies don't matter that's all this is about so when you say Shirley that I'm creating a space so that we could talk about the things that make and break. The strong woman were not saying. Hey there are other women that feel these struggles with having to be strong all the time. Oh would not say in that. We're saying in particular because there's no other place for us to feel safe talk about this. I'm creating the space for us. That's literally all you're doing and I'm really just grinds Mike Gears a little bit that we can't have that and then there are people within our ultimately that don't understand it and it reap so little it's a little of respectable respectability politics because it's all about. Let's not do anything to piss off the white oaks like and I'm like no. We don't want to ruffle any feathers ruffled feathers because the only people that really jumped up I talk about. Oh this is. Adviser are people who aren't black. Because I know that you aren't being devices. This isn't what this isn't your agenda at all. This is to create a space where we can talk about what happened yesterday. What happened yesterday? Is What happens to us. All the all the time when you're when you're in the workplace and I perfectly fell on this being where this lady was saying we're not commented on on a on a post in on shays a strong page and she was saying that think it was the angry black woman coax that she coming in want and she was saying that she can be at work. You know in. She'll say hey. Can you pass pass the sugar? Can you pass the cream white person wall? Wait a minute now because they naturally not all of them or some people naturally assume that that we're naturally when we're not we could be talking in our regular tone in regularly. We didn't say it the way you know you thought we we should have said it. And so automatically were deemed aggressive and angry and on other stuff that they label us. And so I. I have not walked in anybody else's shoes. I can only tell you what by experiences but I I do feel safe saying that. Black women are the real minority. 'cause last jazz beat date. I think not mistaken. It was Malcolm X. Has said that black women are the most disrespect for people in America. Yeah that was I mean who else is getting toned police on the regular day like we are police for everything for the way for the way we were asked shared the way. We the way the way you were closed our features are nose lips. Everything everything we are. Everything is policed when it comes to the African American female so tell me why why should I not create a space where we can be safe and had conversations about think about those things where we don't have suppress what we're feeling exactly like we can actually speak out and speak up and not feel like we're going to be silenced or gas lit. I think said gas at earlier. I don't know I do use burn. Never remember but to me. I don't know what you say but I know what you mean. I really do need this kind of space. Honestly because I've never had it like I've never had it. I've gotten a taste of it once or twice and that's been within the last four years and not kidding. I used to want to be a part of a black Greek sorority. When I was in college and looking back now I know that part of the reason I wanted so badly at the time to be a part of something like that was for this very reason to feel like maybe I could. You'll save somewhere and express myself and has maybe a support system to go to when something was bothering me or what. I experienced something that caused the any kind of harm or maybe even trauma. I did not have that at all and I feel like that's probably the experience of the average black women not having anything like that not having any resource like that and when you don't have any source like you don't feel buyers anywhere that you can turn for any kind of support when you're dealing with racist microaggressions on the daily when you're dealing with with misogyny massaging Warr and tone policing and you're dealing with Ovalles. Gosh I got an extra look a certain way when I go to work or when I go out not even just to work when I go out. I have to make sure I look a certain way. So that people are looking at me like I'm some sort of whatever when the the amount of crusher the quits on someone. It really does take its toll and when you're talking about being alive for forty years fifty plus years and this is what you dealt with. And you've tried. You've tried to do all of quarter poker writings again so that you don't ruffle anyone stutters. What I mean as you don't rougher white people centers you don't after like doing all these so-called things that'll make them respect you or make them love you or make them except you and then you realize oh no. It's never going to be enough. It's never good enough. The posts always get moved. It doesn't matter you're either on educating lazy or you're over educated you're either you're either to over sexualize or it's always something always always somebody something and you can't celebrate yourself you can't express yourself without being police There's so many layers in factors to this that this is in this only what this is. What only we goats auto again microaggressions on the daily on their daily. So please miss me. With the whole initiatives I miss me. How come you can't It's like nobody is excluding anyone I'd never said you never said. Hey don't come unless you're this like it's just like it's it's like a historically black colleges and universities you realize that all distributed against white people right they don't say don't say that you can't apply you can and if you're if you're academics are what they need to be accepted. There are white students that go to these places. That's not why they were created. They were created at a time. When blacks soons couldn't get into other universities? And so. Yeah you're like oh well I mean that's not the case so close all these other schools down our no nos again. We need somewhere will we can actually be nurtured. But you need to be in a space where people actually get it. They get in a place where people actually get into the race with people. People actually see that part that part. We're not invisible. Oh where you're not token is or fetish is. You're not walking into a place in everyone. Sorta sort of accepting you on paper or conditionally or erratically. Because they don't see color opd where you don't have to deal with any of that. Vs let me tell you. I it absolutely I applaud. Let's take the whole hour so they say well people say I don't see color if you don't see color you don't see me if you don't see color then. I guess you never bought me crayons for your kid. Like come on really. Did you say your house must look a mess? Because you can't decorate you. Don't know what kind of clothes you wear it everyday because you don't give me a break like this is like Chai again. It's like let's not say who I am and triumph. Apologize any of it. My blackness is not a pathology. It's not something that's an elephant in the room that you'd have to pretend to ignore. Oh I don't see your color so it's okay. No that's not what I am like. There's nothing wrong with me. There's nothing ugly about. There's nothing unacceptable or or any. There's nothing about me that needs to be about or swept under the rug. You can say I'm a look. She's a black woman. You don't have to go oceans woman like you don't. That's what people when they when they say they don't see color that's what they're doing and I get it. I know it was like no. I'm trying to say that I don't I? Don't judge you by that. No you can't discounting Mike's just counting as for my whole I. You're you're discounting my whole identity and I don't do that with you like your white actually. Did she wind blond hair? Blue Eyes feel all of that. And you'll see that and you don't have a problem with it. So why is it not be? It's exhausting it's absolutely exhausting. And if I didn't have someone on planet earth that I like to talk about this with who would understand get it. This exhaustion would wear me in to where couldn't do it any To have that is liberating to have that. It gives you a sense of freedom a sense of not being boxed Union Yup and hers in stereotype that out when I get an email or Mrs from someone saying Oh what you said just really touched me. It feels so good to to not being this along. Do you know how to my heart because it confirms to me. That space is needed because there are so many black women out there. That really do feel like I'm a news thing alone. Will you're working on a job where there are worse predominantly white? 'cause? I know I worked on her job. There were I was the only black person aside from the scene. Yo and it was. It was always uncomfortable because even for me I was constantly watching. What I'm saying how I'm saying what I'm what I'm wondering how how where my hair because I didn't want to offend the White People. But they don't care about me. That was this one lady there that that worked there and I just really had to get our toll one day good day. She asked me for some change to get something out of out of it and I said I don't carry cash around on me so I don't have any change so I walked on by gun. Halls wants my office. She was she was walking behind me and she said she say on your white girl in a black girl's body and I say what is your your she got. It was cute. She s she follow me almost opposite in an essay. Why did you say why did you say that? And she said because I thought all black black people always carry canvas and I looked at her like. I'm taking it back. I don't know what to say about this so I I'm GonNa continue to let her talk. She said I thought all people carry cash just in case they give portal or they have to go to jail. Jenner and I just looked at it. I'M NOT GONNA call her during but I looked at her. I said first of all. Why do you assume that if a person gets pulled over the automatically going to jail and it seems like that's not what I'm saying? I said that is exactly what you say so this would you say so you can have some. I guess like to bail yourself out whatever we had this whole conversation so those are the so. That's why I'm saying that this space is needed. So yeah I took a little time to tell her how efficient that was and how if she has said that to any other person she would have been doing. Good old fashioned. But because I'm little nice and because we in this is let me explain to you. What's wrong with what you just say? It and I thought the first time she says super stuff like she said a whole lot of superstar at work in these places. Where were you are maybe the only black face in the building and they think you are the encyclopedia all things? I got that too. Why do black people do this Do you think it right. We hosted a louder trainings analysis. One Lady and she will always come in and say do you think of I said that You know the people might be offended about in my. My answer to her was always. If you have to extract question they will probably be as you. Probably a good rule of thumb for so don't says so it. Is those things like those. Are The things that that makes me. No a confirms to need that. This space is needed because people are all. This is one hundred black peop- Black Women Arte only people and I say this with conviction and fourteen and with everything in me because I believe we are the only people who are not allowed the space to work through trauma we expected to grin and bear it on care what's going on in our life tunnel other cheek get over it on respected to stay silent. Racism Sexism ageism color ISM classism all the. Don't say anything. The baddeck were expected to be voiceless when we struggling to being a parent with the silent was stuck in a horrible relationship. Toxic work environment is like whatever happens. Don't say nothing. Let it roll. We are the only war who are expected to do that now. Black men are expected to do it on a certain level but when they when they speak is more acceptable than any is when a black woman. Speaks. That black. Women's GonNa just sit in silence. That's literally part of why what we're talking about like you. We talk about how the term strong black woman is like. It's killing killing us through. It's killing us and that's why we've talked to young women that are like dude. Don't even I don't don't even call me that they don't want. They don't want dicks expectation that they got us like. Hey Glynn something really shitty happens to you this. Shut up and just great. I just have to. You just have to deal with you. Be Okay with it and you have to. Maybe even pretend that nothing ever happened. Arizona's fine and you have to do that over and over and over again. Why so that everyone else around? You can be comfortable can be okay to make an dame comfortable to make them comfortable. You've got to shrink yourself old yourself up stuff yourself in a box tape that box and lock it so that no one else gets offended and that mess it. It's us in. This is one of the things also that we need to be able to talk about amongst each other. You know what else gets it because as I say no one gets. It is because ninety nine point nine for some time they will try to gas into oblivion dailies plus. She made sure this is what they're really hard for. No permit meant any harm. You weren't the ones absolutely. You didn't see the body language you didn't hear the tone of voice. You didn't see the reactions to I react. How would you know what someone actually needs when you're not the one experience so yeah? I I clearly have very very very strong opinions about this but suffice it to say this is something that is one hundred percent needed. I think a lot of times especially in our community whenever something is needed. There's so much backlash at either jess with Riera. Like even just with like. Hey I'm gonNA come out with a makeup line that has forty shades and it's like Oh wait we'll hook hook. It's like dude. I'm not excluding anyone. I said. Forty not for that means you most likely will still be able to find your shape like you always been able to absolutely also other people who have historically not been able to find their sued will probably have a better likelihood of finding it now and. I love what you said about Mac. Quite by the time I started using MAC cosmetics. I was doing a lot of theaters a lot of shows and stuff and then they didn't have just in Britain forty-five because I was W forty-three and so I knew if I need to buy a foundation I have to matt counter at macy's because that's the only way I'm GonNa get my foundation. That's nice shade. Because I need in W Fortensky now. All of these other brands like the mayor leads the cover girls in all of these other brands. Are He. Wait no no. We've not like this and we always had them. It's like okay. First of all you may have always had them. Maybe maybe but even if you did there was no way we're ever GonNa know about it because you never said me. Because they didn't that is us. They don't have the time as well. You see the commercials on television dated. It wasn't our faces. No one would literally not seen L. but what about this model in that model? Yeah the reason why we know the Naomi Campbell's and the tyra banks's the Amman's is because they really are exceptions to the rule. The fact that we can call out their names out of the Sea of supermodels at their been just proves the point that they're not they're not actually checking for us the not looking for us so when a young thirty almost thirty year old Rieti Around since says. Hey I'm checking for you. I'm GonNa make some stuff then. They're all clamoring not because they act. Let me go do not all not. Because they're they're they they have the same vision or the same mission of became. There is money because they just WANNA get I. It's it everything's all good. When there's some white woman wearing corn rows on a magazine cover girl. Don't get me started on Os fashion now. It's fast is a problem when we were. It's a problem when I mean I've literally I've literally heard and seen people make not pleasant remarks about Around me while I'm wearing mind here naturally in an Afro it's ridiculous. It is unknown ridiculous. Our our buts were always too big. Oh my God becky look at all my God and now. They're all spending all this money to get these Kim uncles. That are probably really horrible in their butts so they can have big butts same thing with grips that were too big on us all the same thing with. Tanny. It's it's the same the same thing. I remember years though I posted a basically back in twenty eleven or something. I was like one of the things that I'm really grateful for is. Never Harvard to worry about Needing Spray Tan. Because I don't eat no need. I don't need to go to tanning bed. I don't need to lay out in the sun and get stink answer. I don't need to do any of that but it's it's really you know. The irony is strong that you want to denigrate a woman who that actually is on state then turn around and pay money to try and look like her to try and do they want to say they're quick to say. Oh You Pretty. Fort Knox Game Trillion dollar every time. I was told that yeah. That's all it like it's really it's it's ridiculous and it does something. I am convinced it does something to our collective psyche. It does something to our mental health. I think it's part of the reason. Why so many of us is. Women are struggling with depression and anxiety in addition to all kinds of other factors. It's an and yeah we gotta be able like. I don't have a therapist yet so until I get one. I still need to be able to talk up. Yeah you need to be able to talk about where you're feeling he's been talking about it and the patent the rest of our how long your life right exactly exactly. I agree shocked when you're upset or they're shocked when you break down or whatever and they're wondering what's wrong it's like wow whatever could be wrong there completely clueless and that's just further proof that you don't go insane crap that I go. I go to absolutely and I'm not guest experiences. No saying that yours is not the same as mine. And since I'm not sitting around gas lighting you how about you pay me the same courtesy fame earned since I'm not like hey why don't you yes? We talk a lot about wanting to see representation. We don't talk about hey. Let's get misrepresentation in exclude other folks. That's not what we do. We're just like hey. We consume all of this stuff the same way that you do but never represented so. Let me see my face on the screen. Can I see my face on the screen? Mike wants a while like every now and again because it reflects the world that I live in. I guess it doesn't reflect where you live but it does reflect where and again if it doesn't reflect where you live. That's further proof. You don't go through the same stuff that I go through. Which means yes. I need a space to talk about these things like everytime they turned on the television. They'RE GONNA they're gonNA see their faces. Will we turn it on? We might see one token black person. Yeah and and like we said at the beginning. It's gotten a lot better but it's really been just this last decade really. I don't even think he's Baylor. Defecate I think is probably you know what you're reading five. He's really five years and the and the fact that would still get so we see so much pushback and so much over the fact that there's still so much resistance in so many complaints we do see more. Representation is yet again. Further proof that what we experience as black women is not the same as all of the rest of the women because if that were the exact same it would ease wish faculty. There wouldn't be all these anti-black remarks microaggressions from not just white women but other women of color that aren't black it wouldn't exist so obviously it does mean that. We need some face of our own to process a lot of the buyer stop. That is the three living in breathing of just being black female. And I don't know how much how much more succinctly we can explain it re people to get it. I think a lot of people have even expanded. A lot of different people. Black women have explained it and people hear it and they keep coming with the same kinds of questions and starting to think that they're being deliberately obtuse or they're just wanting to be rookery ignorant because they really don't WanNa have to face those routes and I'm like if you don't WanNa face those choose bats your problem that might. We're not getting rid of our space exactly. We're not doing a you cannot for for the people who questioning why this space was created. You cannot continue to bury your head in the sand because because these things that we are talking about are real-life issues these are real. Life stroke was stabbed Glenn Vase every day of their lives. If you never hedge our emotions blamed on your identity I e being black and female if you've never been telling pretty for dark skinned girl if you've never been followed around in a store if you've never been profiled for riding in a particular car are driving up into the up in your driveway in in a specific neighborhood. If none of that stuff has ever happened you have. None of that has ever happened. Ticking super because of your gender and color of your skin and I'm an easy to take several seats. Several several several get really like. Don't get back up just take segmentation like seriously because like I like I'm done I'm done having to constantly Laid myself constantly explain. Why Oh my gosh like this is doing this so that I can actually heal from some stuff about that like you. I'm a better person for myself. A better person or my husband. My children people around me for more a heal from this and part of my healing involves being able to talk about this with other black women. I know for a sad that I can't talk about this. With the average white woman or the average non black woman of color because as been there done that a cement movie already. I know what happens? It's not doing it anymore owner. Who Like I'm not doing it anymore? We're not like that. I'm I'm not doing it because I can't. I can't find the healing but I need that way. Absolutely ultimately desperate. That's what this entire movement movement is about is about healing at the end of the day. We are simply fighting for our right to be to be seen into her. Without Being Sean in ridiculed and stereotyped and so instead of questioning why the space was created how? `Bout you get onboard. Gps CAn't on doubt US dismantle the myths and a labeling and the stereotypes. That would be great. That would be wonderful to see. This is another thing that I believe for or I believe that Malcolm X. was at one hundred percent dead on accurate when he said that black women are the most suspected in the most unprotected Women in this country. It doesn't mean that other women are disrespected. Other women aren't protected. Doesn't mean the white women are disrespected not protected. That's that's also true. He said the most consistently so imagine what happens if all women as you want all women start with banding together and surrounding protecting the most vulnerable of them first and getting them the healing and support that they deserve and then everyone rises and the as those women get whole and healed. Then we can go to the next group of women back that are Vulnerable that are most vulnerable and so on and so forth until eventually none of us are most vulnerable. Absolutely nobody ever thinks about that. You think about it in your own families though when you have a sick child and the rest of your children aren't sick you do you do everything you can to. Alma tension to get that one child at the other healthy so that the others don't get sick and then once. That child is back to their normal hell than all the kids are. Okay but you don't you don't sit and have conversations with your spouse or with your extended family about how come you're only you? How come you only tending to that one? One one child because she has pneumonia and the rest of my kids. Don't have it so yes I'm quarantining her and myself and I'm taking care of her specifically it's a similar concept ever do that when it's your own family. How can you possibly see that in a larger scale out in the world like we've got to do a lot better about thinking about people who are most most vulnerable in the most marginalized and and the truth of the matter is that is that as people who are poor people who are blacked? It was women. It is Trans Women. Black Trans Women Disabled People People with mental illness. Those are the people who get dumped on the most and they are the most vulnerable and be most unprotected in what we should be doing is cooling all of our support and resources as people that the people that don't have those those Circumstances Daesh be banding around those people and doing everything that Kansas support them so where to where they can rise up to whatever rebel everyone else's at so then we can all continue to ride through. I don't understand like I guess maybe it's because of a mom and I have multiple kids your mom and you have kids. It seems crystal clear to me because this is exactly what I do. My own home is exactly what we our own homes. When one of our children is not doing well doesn't mean we don't live are the kids and we look in a somebody. Were to accuse us of that. Would look at him. Cross-eyed like they have to like. What are we talking about yourself stupid? It's not even about that. It's about hey I've gotta get this child healthy again. I've gotta get this child the help that she needs to get through school or whatever and this is what we're doing we're just trying to get pleasant. Sounds like you're doing this what we're doing and it'd be great if we didn't have to do that for ourselves by ourselves. All what it is what it is. It is what it is absolutely regards. I kept saying I wasn't gonNA keep talking talking sometimes. You just gotTa get it all out sometimes. Just gotTa get it all out and so it's a hot button issue for me. It is for me because I really was taken aback. When when I received the question Indian I looked at the profile and I was like Oh okay and so yeah but let's be afraid of ruffling feathers inning. Yeah we're we`re. We're not armed raid. Yeah we'RE GONNA WE'RE GONNA HAVE WE'RE GONNA we're GonNa have the hard conversations and we're GONNA continue to show up in this space out for our sisters that yes I love and support and it is a hope and a prayer. The other people join us in this room and he don't want to join in the movement. Just remind silent to stay silent if you don't WanNa be a part of it. Don't try to disrupt what we have here. Just remain silent. Stand your little corner which hit buried in the sand and we're gonNA keep doing what we're doing tells me a lot. It says a lot. It speaks during August tells me exactly where you stand where you do need to know that Except he needs but at the end of the day. The space will be here. It is going to continue to grow. Nadan are going to continue to show up in our listeners to union and all who are listening natty and I are here for you. We support you wholeheartedly. We support your journey. We support your healing. We support you wherever you need us. So don't be afraid to reach out this base angle and nowhere. We hit a state and we are not to be silent while we're here. We're not going to allow anybody to silence us. Those who look like us those who don't we will not be silenced and about that and so I think there's a great not doin unless you have some You Want. She wants to amber. We're GONNA we're we're here. Yeah I do want to add a tiny little bit when I say would save black women. I also mean black women who are biracial. Because I am a mom of Biracial kids. Assalaam was was light skin. I mean she wasn't white passing her but she was. She was light skin. And when I say black women I also mean black women who are who are white passing. Because there's a lot of healing that we have to do color ro do that. None of those women are in the space ask Selanne. I don't want my kids going into adulthood feeling like well. There's really no place for me because to not BRAC enough from not white enough right. Exactly I don't ever want them feel lack enough and they don't long if you had a black female we don't you. I mean I don't mean like our original dollar now but yeah low know these other people know anyway. I know you're not talking about that. We identify truly truly as a black female. Yeah we're not sound by Rachel Anyway episode. And we'd have we got. We're going to have that conversation. Yes but so anyway. So yeah. That's what we wanted to talk about today because we want everybody to understand Our goal here is not to exclude anyone but is to love and support. Those people like Natalie say who are be most vulnerable d most marginalized. And no matter what you think about it. That is African American female in the story. So yeah I think we have our closing remarks. We're going to get out of here. We have one more episode coming up in season two. Then we're gonNA take a little break and we're GONNA come back with even more goodness in season three follow us on instagram twitter facebook. Dot Com Allah goodness and continue messages. Because Netherland and I are enjoying reading and seeing how you guys are being blessed from this content so continued sending messages on this end. We'll be right back here next week.