You Look Fat!
Senior Life Journeys Presents Carol Howls. Let's talk dementia. A podcast designed to help caregivers find knowledge power hope and SMILES IN THEIR DEMENTIA. Caregiving generally welcome to. Let's talk dementia. Here's your host bestselling author Carol. Welcome to let's talk to meantime Carol how your host and today we're GonNa talk about being fat. Yes we are and we're going to talk about a few Bible verses in quotes that have come to my mind lately that reflect directly applying the situations in my life and I thought you know it might help you in your life to join just maligning here and having a bit of a problem. We'll have had someone tell you you're fat. You look like you're pregnant. When is the baby due? Or you know your hair just looks awful or where did you get that pair of pants? Were they bad on you? Something just so hurtful and so inappropriate. I think we've all had that happen. And if you haven't will then yeah for you but if you're caregiving hold onto those pants that you've got on letter to Die. 'cause he's probably going to happen are folks with dementia are none for saying things that are inappropriate? And it's not necessarily that they're out to hurt you. They just say what comes to their mind. If they think you look like you put on a few pounds in this just gonNA come out and it may not land on. You may not feel so good when they say it but the question is how. Are you going to respond to those statements that are inappropriate or hurtful or offensive in some way other? Well you can be defensive. You can go well. I'm not fat but outlook as fast as you or my herlitz better than your hair or do you think these pants look bad. You should look in the mirror. What you've got on. You could say that anybody and there's really nobody on the planet you can say that too that the end result is going to be good is it and certainly not with your folks with dementia. Now if they don't have the demand don't have dementia and they say that to you then you really do have to wonder what's going on in their world that they think it's okay. Say these inappropriate things and you know what we don't know what's going on in our in other people's world we do good just to keep up with our own world. Forget keeping everybody else's straight so maybe just maybe we should ignore it from them. Maybe maybe we shouldn't. I'm not sure I don't want to hear those words to have to discern what my response would be to my person who does not have dementia but to my person who has dementia. You Might WanNa go. You know what you might be right. I should probably eat more sale reinstated. Donuts where do you think in see what their responses it would probably just cut the edge off or or the tension in the room might be less than just by agreeing? Yep I'll look wolf. Fatima should eat celery instead of donuts. And see what they say. And then you might say something like. What do you like on your salary? If you were to eat salary. What would you put on it? See what their response is. And if they don't have a good response say. Do you like peanut. Butter on celery. Have you ever tried putting peanut butter with raisins on your salary? Do you know what they call that. That's called ants on a log if you have peanut butter on a piece of salary. New Put Raisins isn't that NEAT. See Now we've taken the conversation from something that was offensive. Something that made you feel not so good or maybe even a little angry to the universal language in what told you is the universal language it is not it is food. We all relate to it and we used to version therapy to do that. We took him from one point. All the way to something different Wa- stealing knowledge in what they said. It's hard to do sometimes but it is something that I tell you over and over again for various reasons in here giving their things you need to practice in diversion. Therapy is one of them on the tape the last few days. I've had some emotions to deal with that. I have not been enjoying As you know my mom passed may thirty first and I think about her day my life and there are days that I do it. Wale and there are days when it just gets a hold of me more than what I wanted to my friend. Linda told me lead those feelings com. Let them wash over you in. Let them leave. And I've done well at that but the last few days have not done so well letting him leave. I kinda came to the realization. I'm no one's daughter That's a weird feeling. Obviously my whole life. I've been somebody's daughter and I am not anyone's daughter right now. I am not my Mama's caregiver and I love being honest caregiver There was never a thing that I did that. Mama did not affirm that I did not hear from her. Oh cookie you've got this you can. Do it have a good friend that I've recently met Michelle and showbiz eighty two years old. She's only one year older than my Momma and She has a way of a filling in sometimes on the emotions that I might would have gotten from Mama and today. She told me kid. Whatever it is you WanNa do you just do you? Just make it work saying. I just heard mom in that. Made me feel good but I wanted to read to you a quote from the Bible that I'm reading. I'm trying to think of the that. This gentleman took the Bible. Broke it up into a year and is price for America Bible. That's it and so you have old testament new tests Moore Song proverbs but there is a little prayer at the beginning of each day. I'll read you what it was for yesterday. I believe these are my Abysmal glasses for you guys. That are not seeing this but hearing hit the color on. These glasses is awful but anyway. Here's the prayer and it just really struck me now thank you it relates to caregiving to Lord. You told your first followers to have courage because you were with them. Help us to soak in that message tune to fill it in our buried bones. Remind us you've got this. You're in control. It'll be okay. I'm in Oman. Does that not speak to caregiving? Yes I think it does. And so a while back. I was given a package of today's prayer cards. Can you see that with the light on it? And they're just little four by six cards assists. Today's prayer on one side on the other side as today's prayer this was yesterday's God is within her. She will not fall. This was today. Faith can move mountains kind of where I am in this journey. Feeling that I need bolstered up and I know you do too in your caregiving journey. Have days where you think you got it going on in the days when you need bolstered up you can do this. God's got you. Faith can move. Mountains God is within her. She will not fall. You won't either but I'm here for you. Email me Carol at let's Talk Dementia Dot Org. We'll talk about what's going on in your world blessing since miles. Let's talk dementia would like to thank our sponsors National Association of Veterans and Families? You can reach them at eight hundred three five to to nine one nine on the Internet at www dot in dot org. They speak veterans. So you don't have to and you tell them Carol. Saint you when you call to inquire about benefits for the veteran spouse better or both editor bed you can find Ms Beth crosby at editor Beth dot com. She is amazing. Looking at what you've written in making sure it represents you will find her at. Www dot editor Beth dot com and HD imports located on street extension in Rock Hill South Carolina. That's your county eighty three nine eight five zero nine eight five. They are there for the hunt the repair and maintenance of your Honda Hyundai Toyota Kia. Tell Them Carol CINCI. Thanks for joining US. Today for Carol. Howls let's talk dementia to learn more about dementia we recommend Carols bestselling book also titled. Let's talk dementia. It's available on Amazon in paperback and kindle versions. Be sure to like. Let's talk on facebook and leave us a kind word of review on itunes remember knowledge brings power power brings hope hope bring smiles and we all need more smiles. Thanks for joining us today. And we'll be right here when you come back to. Let's talk dementia.