TFATK Episode 475


Spokane Washington July eleven time. You're going to go do this podcast off again. It's a fun place. You told me light it. I'll be there spots man next weekend. San Francisco cobs nineteenth and twentieth. I will be there. The diversity of your spokane crowd is it super no books as and why different shades of white yeah all right here we go baby then you're in San Fran Dude Qasr on the best clubs in the world you can last time we were together there. It was great fun special. Where are you going to be bro Dude? I'm so glad you're ass. I'm in Cincinnati of D-ohio just Friday and Saturday Funny Bone Cincinnati Ohio just two days Friday Saturday. Get your tickets. I'm bringing a son and Derek Post and with me Tommy Store Finest Doormen Cincinnati the next week. I'm an indie helium indie Thursday Friday Saturday and then August first through the third. I'm in Nashville Thrill Zanies. Those tickets are sold out. I love me some Zanies than Portland. Just went live August fifteenth through Seventeenth Portland but Cincinnati see this Friday Saturday. Get your tickets now. DOT COM DOT COM. Yes podcast is brought brought to you by the one the only the best C._B._D.. Oil On planet Earth Organic Camp Oil. I'm talking non G._M._O.. The only third party tested pure fine organic tamp certified the Best Pure C._B._O.. On the planet it's pure spectrum C._B._D.. Oil Go to pure spectrum C._B._D.. Dot Com Promo Code is Shaab save ten percent off the entire website. You guys has no from me. How important is for my family? especially my son who's having issues oil saved my son's life. I take every day is the most important supplement I've ever put in my body. My son takes it every morning every night. One hundred percent organic third-party tested acid two hundred percent guaranteed what we tell you is in the bottle T._H._C. free. You'RE NOT GONNA get high. It's the best thing you put in your body pure spectrum C._B._D.. 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Eighteen cups coffee founded by former special operations vets combined. I love of coffee with a lot of hunting in the great outdoors. That's right. You're a no brainer man. No brainer visit black rifle coffee dot com slash Shaab and receive ten percents off your order. That's black REVA COFFEE DOT COM slash shop S. C. H. A. U._B.. Ten percent off black rifle coffee dot com slash shop. Many men can withstand punch obviously obviously a for sure Senate set a here on them black belt and chips chicken. I think you'd be surprised I think you'd be surprised havoc any fight club spiked club bike club. Kids get the peace on peace on one to cutie pies. I still got it baby. Lift Your Shield and now from the studios in Playa Vista. California is the moment you've been waiting for the final and the kid is coming at you know we're not lying. That doesn't make sense but we're not we don't now it's fodder and the kid live Bro. I'm I am drinking my cold brew Mocha to me. It's a Mocha they're a little chocolate and it takes them twenty four hours to make see that's a lot you know me when it comes to artisan ship if you show me the difference between the grain of wood on something if you say this is good but this this is really goes like this guy was showing the <unk> being poverty and then pumped to the great opportunities that he's things well. He goes yeah but you don't know listen to this and he played me this other Guy Blind guy who's now it was a guy who if you're the real aficionado opera and I didn't know the difference but I was like there is a difference. Here's the difference I buy into it. Do you know like you say that yeah because I got to get rid of the monster truck right because that truck will excuse me why anyone let me by that no idea. Where were you on that one? I don't know I don't need to big. It's too big you have to learn the hard left to go. Yeah you have to go big and then learned the hardware hardware 'cause you're the most stubborn person like there's no way anybody telling you what to do until you go. Oh this isn't I'm trying to back. This pop and I can't get this Ju- Tommy store went dude. We love you but you can't parking lot anymore because your car takes up three spots and we can't get we can't get you out. Just two can't go there so at the store now impromptu camp ballet takes up too much dude we just we up here. Is there any way you can't just drive the fry because when you bring the raptor blocks everyone why can't drive it anywhere because the monster truck in L._A.. Brandon yeah and your Moron so that's not gonNA work. Get rid of close the two tires in the back because I'm GonNa off-road. 'cause I'm off road. I know of never right so that thing you know the thing that the guy I was shocked. It's on the cars and I know you're not for it so I just want the most B._C.. Raptor St Raptor the guy who had it before me goes yes so the shocks and this man you can go Baja. If you WANNA jump boat rocks yeah no doubt probably the only genus thing go over to speed bump on fucking Laurel Canyon really speed limit you're supposed to and he goes and I see him. Go that's a shame and I was like whatever dude he was right that things not gonNA fit in my lifetime so you it so yesterday as I need a dad right yeah fries. How do you get rid of that? You sell that sell like hotcakes it will oh yeah the color of the Combo everything I paid for yeah. Nothing's going to be okay. I got my Guy Greg right so we have four bid on it so house. Yesterday I went with Greg. Do Go drive other dad cars and this is to your point where you're saying the difference between things so he takes me in. It's called a G._T.. It's a four door G._T.. Mercedes these. You only have two doors with that four doors now. It's like Baltimat- Dad Gar bring that up so the Mercedes G. T. Four door but it's the G._T._S. right is the G._T._S. hatchback so it's a seven hundred horsepower. Oh my God. It's a monster M._G.. Right that's it. That's exactly what I test drove the G._T._S. so I go. What's the price they tell me what's monthly bill okay right up? I go well. I don't need I don't need to ask and the Guy Greg goes I mean you'll you feel differently at differing. We'll go in the engineering of the problem and the steer any kids to you do that to you because you don't put me in that. I don't put me in that first because then the other thing drives like ah get out of it when I'm sad. How much is your payment? pry behalf went. It's just not I'll be sad. I'd be thinking about that when the whole time so he had reconsidered everything it's true man when the quality that's why you make fun with Ferrari's or my yeah. I know what these these now. Listen we making the transition out of those. No this is the same thing. Can I be on. Let me just stop for a second. They have small fins on the back. So are you are you who is the guy who are you flash but there's another there's a God bless just Dick who's the god of the Greek with wings on his feet Hermes. You're are you Husky. Hermes on the thicker means you think Hermes your Husky Hermes the Hermes clothing because things have those things you look like you're wearing mini porsches and I'll take that but listen this dude this designer his name's June Takahashi Yup June Takahashi check it out against the government in Japan Japan right so he's one of these are undercover collab- so June Takahashi against the in China China he pulled off his shoe on so he's one of the top designers but because he went against the government China. You can't sell his shin. Takahashi is Japanese Japanese but but they pulled like he went against the go no the Hong Kong protests so they so they pulled all his collab- papa got the news from the underground so he's a hard to get so they won't sell shoes in China. What are those hollow undercover underscored lab now you can you can go fuck off with those shoes also because I don't care but but what do you like about them so much dude it's just because you look to the effort and the quality that went into these shoes not quality with your coffee and everything Dan 'cause? If you compare these are regular pair of Cortez or something like dad or running shoes yeah. What are we doing really driving that other car I so are you telling me you'RE GONNA S? Can you please not do the S. Can you please save the money. It's half as much well not exactly a lot of savings. I mean are you going to. You're going to be in traffic sir. You know this right not they'll be but you are paying and then also that's dad car so I take the pain dad car. That's seven hundred horsepower. Please stop calling the biggest his dad carb all time but it's not a dad car right is though because I'm a dad but the backs not bad carcass incites cray driving with a helmet so it's snot out of that car well no he could be then no no see. I have to know Ah have to stop here because the dad's car went dead Carmen. Why don't you do this? Please try. Will you please revenue and test drive. Please test drive Tesla no fucking ninety. It looks like it looks like shit it. Does it bring that test. I guarantee you if you get in this G._T.. Four Door A._M.. G G._T._S. and the engine has is better fucking pick up. Now it's electric. It doesn't do anything anything for me dude and that's just test last U._v. and then all typing gay at the end dude please though the thing you told me the things sexy look. Is that thing sexy in any fashion I loved anybody Ores Dude you make fun of my shoes. Yoursel me on this stage. Show your shoes go with your shoe. Things sexy compared to the while I was just looking at you. You know what it is. The problem is you need. Did you need that. I love to drive you. Start Your Ferrari up yesterday and you know that I I jumped. I jumped. I jumped. I jumped with fright. Daddy's getting new exhaust on tomorrow. <hes> come on please daddy soup up. Your Ferrari pleased audie that far. Your Guy told me that he needs to have somebody come to teach you how to drive it. We've been through that because it's so it's it's such a monster I know oh please don't soup it. Who cleese? How was how stand up on the spot last night? It was awesome I did I did I made for that. I did a story about street fighting in French. That's hilarious. They really liked it. I go and it must be French no well. I also worry about you know the great thing about standup on spas you come up with bits like it gave me a really good record it. I was Reno I in my mind. I know what to do. Now I'll do is I'll record it but then in the back dramatic go dude. You should think about this this and this yeah yeah it was good. Who is you rogin me? Rogan Chirac Jerry Seinfeld as well right <hes> Jeremey who else I don't know I I don't even know the girl from one of the Girls Christina from the podcast guys we fucked. I don't know I don't know I don't know interesting buddy fun those fine. Oh you saw it was fun though yeah you <hes> You saw her buddy <hes> ruckle he's in town. I saw Luke House. I'm doing buddy <hes>. He's got some problems with his job but he's GonNa but he's okay. He's broke it before. I don't think he's ever broken before. No no I think he's broken hard. Yeah I think no I think he's in a good place to the I do. I think he's in a good place in terms of <hes> you know he's he's got. He's GonNa options like we were talking about man. It's a sad story and he's done everything he had to do in the and the U._F._C. I told you the whole famer there's nothing to do. If you want to stick around to five you can do that and I think it'd be Saas out his his choice. I have no idea but the main thing is just to get some stuff. You know he's just chilling recovering. You know it's interesting as you you have been there seventeen fights and so new fights count my ultimate Fata. It'd be twenty than <hes> twenty four twenty four to a lot of fights a lot of fights to have I forgot. I didn't know you were that extensive but I guess you did fight for eight years. Awhile I mean that's a long time so when you are intimately involved in something you know you can see things that other people don't just because you've been there and you can see the subtleties and nuances and and the mindset mindset and <hes> I think you are how would you when you when you were contemplating retirement retire and thirteen yeah so that'd be that'd be what six years ago and then happened for that so you're talking about damnest for seven and a half years almost eight years when I started thinking about it and I did it legitimately six years ago. I don't know I don't want to speak for Lucado head but you don't have to. I know to a T._B.. I'm telling you yeah I'm telling you when I I just know I just one advantage. I have over all I'm not a journalist but all you know when I do below the belt the one advantage over all them if I'd have been in there I know what they're going. Huge Fan experience yes so in actual field. He'll do you want this guy who listen. I'm studies war. Do you want to talk about the guy who's on the battlefield is on the battlefield and also the guy who succeeded and failed. WHO's got knocked out has knocked out has done all these things? I beat them. The Best I would say that loss this is also are more important in terms of experience understandable huge brother fucking understand what really goes on it's huge yeah so you can call me when you destroy the set but when you bomb the really go back to the start work on things like that didn't work there that didn't work there so they can fighting when you get knocked out well. This isn't working. Even though some of it's working go back and you just you really dial in on what you need to do a really good speech by Arnold Schwarzenegger. He gave a commencement issue type. I really really good not a lot of people are successful in that many genres Mr Arnold Schwarzen- older you makes me look like a pet. Thank you sir. I mean and you know what he said. He said I don't like plan B's when you're going for or something I know that'd be all you'd better be all your any better be all and he said because you're competing with people who are all and if you have a plan B if you have an op option in anything in life when you're trying and I think that's an important thing to keep in mind for put especially with fighting be my. The mother the any doubt if there's any consequences the consequences are if you want to be a senior and you'll have a plan. You don't make it all right. You'll find something else in fighting if you have if you have a plan B. you're going to get really really injured so the contents are so dramatic like just don't do it if your body. I've always said your body will tell the truth your body whether you say whatever you want your brain can say whatever you want us a little bit like like with my psoriasis that had to do with emotional shit that I was not okay and once I took care that called in what you did so I saw my mother but once I dealt with with the issues of my life that were not resolved and I dealt with them honestly and confronted them. What a surprise that my psoriasis went away so a lot of times you may say you're into something and you're not your body will tell story now recounting and fighting when you were going to fight Travis Brown and I saw your face and you're like I wasn't into it well? You didn't even have an energy in your body. Guess what fake it. You can't fake it because your body was like hey we don't want to do this so your your body's shutdowns. You're tired yeah so that's all that's why you had a fucking plan B.. I remember because you were sitting there and we were we would we would always bond. We'd all be sitting around laughing and telling stories in a bar and even if you weren't drinking as the best I would just be laughing and talking and I remember you said we go. How good is this? How good is this just a hanging? Talk like this and you go so I want to do so I want to do and I go and I went well. That's all I WANNA do. I looked at you and I went. Oh you got a big smile on your face and I was like oh I was delighted because I was like good but but at the same time that can't be all you WANNA do Jorges cosby doll. That's not all he wants to do. He wants to put his fist through your face. You know it's a different thing but I I think that's the worst thing to say. I don't like plan B's be all in when you when you and my mother said to me when I was an actor never forgot this. She said she sat down she said what is your plan B <hes>. Do you think you should go back to school and get your law degree or get your M._B._A.. In case case this doesn't work out and I remember I looked at her and I said I don't have a plan B baby. This is it if I don't make baby no decide when it goes on I go. I'll have a baby and she goes. She goes what I go. Ah Shut up come here and I made out and then you let your and they went you disgusting scene Hollywood pitch and I have I have a son who's also my brother Yeah but that's important thing and I see so many people and I know you on the road. One of my favorite things to do is when I don't bring Derek in Assan with other the local talent I talked this one guy I could tell like nick he did his first set and it was rough man and he comes in the Ba- around the fucking comedy store. I see the best in the world so the guy comes back and I go I in you know Jay's with me all the time and j you know he sees everyone and Jay US rough. I bet you he hasn't been doing stand up. Comes the back and I go. Hey brother how many how many times a month are you getting up around here. IOS maybe once a month fell outgoing. I went oh well. You're not doing stand up dude. He's not come back. We'll know the comic. Do I'm around guys. I mean they're getting up four or five times. If you're driving deal our and right lied nope Navy guys dare Kasan Day drive to San Diego on a Wednesday night to do six minutes minute spot that drive back to Burbank do a spot and then you know they get on another show like united in the race so the plan B. or whatever you're doing. You're not all in your comparing gonNA summer in that yeah. That's who you're competing with. Don't give a fuck talk with the same advice to when mark millions as we talk those guys about coming to practice then I'm in the race like if you have to tell people come to practice or fifth till comics and make sure again they're sets and I do not we're not even the same boat so so frustrating to me. I'm always like hold on. It's not eating and breathing this. That's why I think life is fair a lot of times a lot of times. It's not a lot of times it is success like when you see people really successful not an accident especially if it's prolonged success not an accurate take a look and how they live their life and take a look at how you live your life and what will happen is. I always say this about Hollywood. I didn't make it as an actor for a long time because I didn't want to act so my body my body when I went into an audition movie I wasn't ready I. I didn't get ready for the audition because I didn't want to be on a set. It's fair. It is fair house. I'm real talented. I know that guy wanted more better. He might be just as talented but he works his ass off or not as talented but he's prepared. He's prepared. I saw that I saw certain actors that we're really famous well. I watched Bradley Cooper. That motherfucker was Bradley. Cooper was going to get the part that much better looking well. He's also way better. Looking good looking doesn't matter a lot good looking guy. You'll be so much better looking. Don't say so much looking when I was younger Bradley. He's got some as booed. I told you when he sweats. His girlfriend smelled them ever tell you she loves it. No she goes he was leaning. I didn't know him very well back in the day and she smelled him his fiancee at the time and she goes I go what are you doing. He was it was hot day. We're on our way flying to nantucket and she goes he smells like olive oil and he sweats. I was like this motherfucker smells like olive olive oil I bet he does I was like this motherfucker and then he's then you play a board game with Bradley and he's really competitive but when you win he goes like this he goes. Oh good job dude fucking good. He's a really good sport. He broke they broke up with his girl and now there's rooms lady Gaga Right. He broke up with that girl is the hottest home is who she is delicious the lady who but oh my God she's not listen. There's someone sick of fucking be out his name's Jason. I'm saying that's just the way it goes. It's just the way the cookie crumbles in our lives dude. He's he's. He is what he is man. He's dating in late Goggin up. Here's the advantage lady Gaga has over this. She's so hot. It's frustrating such great teeth. She's so that's like that's like what happens. When you see Ferrari like you I caught Brennan fucking trying to he was rubbing his genitals against his Ferrari fucked exhaust in they had to pull him off his own Ferrari? Yes she's pressuring the hot but here's the advantage lady. Gaga has issue. Just has that effected on. She's she's she's an artist. She's powerful right. She's a bit of a boss. She might not look like her but she has this. She's those X.. Fascists undeniable bro shut shot good at everything but compared to the other girl I mean what are we talking about here. You know and talking I I mean but she has factors that she doesn't. That's that's one you've been dated. Fuck in Ferrari's but there's not much going on and you get when you get you get a Honda Civic. That has a bunch of tricks up its leave town Allen Bob drawn to it suckers for personality one thing about my my wife who is the fucking hilarious. She always had a great sense of humor. She's got a great sense of humor but when my son John I think is going to be a comic but yeah personality as you get older his everything yeah because you're stuck with them do super curvy. That's the as soon as long as you have a percentage a huge rack you don't say krasny waste but other than that yeah so he can switch Chin still no nothing on the dating front wheel of course there's dating on the front he's got do what are you GonNa do. You'll see no. I don't see changes. You'll see you'll see this. He looked sideways. Do you know when they when they when they'll see as a story comes breaking out that the seventeen girls trapped in his basement yeah yeah yeah. What do you mean Gaga? What what if he's dating Bradley Cooper's ex that hot smoke show never know he's hey let's talk about? Let's move on why you talk offensive Jim. What do you what are you going to do? Though have you ever thought about it. I'm really not concerned and right. Now your forty one forty two. I just turned forty two. When was your birthday April? Do we celebrate it now. By the way you guys for cats birthday I did not I was out of town that texter okay. When was your birthday? It was less Wednesday the the third you fucked. I didn't know that happy birthday also in Hawaii but I did text cat. I'm terrible yeah. We're birthdays but you don't bring yours up. Chink you know anyone to know your age. I just don't like people making a big deal out of it age. I don't care and you bring up but here's the thing what your plan to your forty two and there are I say this was all due respect. There are mill prospects. There is dude. There's prospects. I'm just I'm a pain Dana deal with I think you're not you're tall handsome knobs talking about my looks. Why did you like to sing and Shit on in your end just because it's super he's anal about things? He doesn't like change right control. Honestly being single is probably one of my favorite things right. Now you like your alone time. I do yeah yeah because I was away by anything one of the things about having children and have yes e- is that you you just there's nothing like that. You're you're not an individual anymore anymore. Yeah there's no alone time being home and just not worrying about what you can get. A girl who super independence can do our own thing. Let's see no no. You're waiting for technology with a you'll see I wonder take plenty plenty forty and he's trying to figure out like how to tell his parents. You'll see you're trying to there's definitely girls but I'm not really like super. There's none that I'm like wow what would actually want to spend real time with no desire to spend time with girls at all no not that like an actual girlfriend Utusan having fun go out and have fun just in general general do still do you go in group dates no usually if you guys ever talk to people that watch the show. This is show whenever they see me outside. I'm usually with yeah yeah talk about as a friend aren't some of friends yeah I do Brenton. I don't have girlfriends really that's not how we roll no. We're our guys. Now you see the gal that's going to be aged. Triple someone sucking like like if you saw if you saw Brennan and I I'm just saying that's my only girlfriend yeah you saw Brennan I out. We were at dinner with a girl or we era. It'd be almost set French better be they better be publicist or a business associate without notebook in front of them because otherwise some female otherwise we guilty. Here's somebody milk. You know what I'm saying. No what was the woman in his car guilty guilty guilty full-blown at dinner with at a bar with the guilty here in the state. There's a reason guilty did you not I'm stressed out. About what are you GONNA do. I honestly if I want to settle down. If I'm just like tired of being whatever then I have options I would say about like what that's if I just give up on like what about family and kids like they can do both i. I don't want them in the end career. I honestly don't have like a real relationship right now. Now don't want kids. I mean maybe one day I'm not like one day. No pro. I had a kid of what forty-six he said. I was forty one your ah your latest kid when you're yeah dude. His kids are second. One was that was forty. Forty six did very little boom forty six man. No my son's seven so forty five forty five three years. That's a long time I can seve the child. I I get a kid before that Cisco is busting my son was conceived. The hotel Batali yeah broke Graf had cats browse. I here comes. The fucking Gif here becomes the little may get welcome. That's what I say icing yeah yeah. Nothing hunch that you guys are so concerned that's sweet. That's very alarming to me. I'm fine with it. I think you're thinking is a lone wolf. I like the right now like right now for now. You've been how long I think Tennessee I've been seeing for. How long have you been with us two and a half years you you do know that you know that if you've ever came to us and said Hey guys just guys you know you and I would not give celebrated? I only transnet gay no even if he is who both Brennan and I would would be your biggest. I appreciate that the real ratings on the show we would be would appreciate your wedding. Go through dudes sick. I would marry you at your wedding. I mean I just a little and the fire you but you're going to hell but still Jesus. I always talk about being stuck imprinting. Go somewhere but I'll celebrate. I'm a conservative. I'm I'm an economic conservative and I can't stand left-wing identity politics but I'm basically super liberal social me to marry and I you know I it's awesome yeah well. It's a belief appalachians belong to an F. years we went to Australia. Maybe three years you've been with was when we remember when we left Fox. I remember an exact date and everything like decided to leave us four years to leave. I think it would be a disaster for us. Yeah we complete bobbed up over a complete complete nightmare. We need you guys. Thank you Brian can leave. We need you know you can trust that we that you really rely on fucking good. We went through a lot of like people you know do a lot of frogs before we found is like your clockwork reliable. It's fucking a not to gain. They're not a lot of people that are like that. They're not a lot of people who are tough tough enough to fucking be clockwork like he's fucking reliable dude. I admire it how they were always in. My Koreans are Vietnamese. No Joke Vietnamese again. I've said it a thousand times. No one has ever conquered Vietnam Vietnam. They've tried and wants to the Chinese not these days more that our land round there we should go there. Apparently it's great do too far fly. So what do you what do you think is the verdict luncheon. Now you've probably more than US remember on the road with chimneys vary a reclusive. He's he's eating Sushi out of a market. He's doing his own thing. He's an artist. We wound up too soon though we barely knew each other so it was like kind of we want our huge long trip when we barely it was it was a why was it weird. Oh because I in cold opened sold out theatres the two year in Australia. That's a lot of cold open Jesus Christ those my training camp if Brennan will get naked in front of us no problem right like we're just make it wouldn't matter what happens you would not get naked in front of us right now no not let's Asian culture the locker rooms even when Asia's being locker room. They were never liked the white or black guys yeah. Aw Fuck and do karate kicks and everyone's laughing and shit. I've had Black Eyes User Dixon Talking Mike Fun Dude. It's been locking with Asians they doing that now. Leo Machida Watch Tower our does I've never seen as disappointing. I want to see the Dragon. You feel me feel because he's got these Hayes half-brazilian so I know might be worth. It might be that big old Dick <hes> cat. What do you think is going on with Chin? Can you hang out on your own yeah. I think chain is really picky. I think he needs a very particular type of person and I don't know if that person exists in our area seventy friends as young as they're going to be really young though I don't know if he wants somebody buddy not sure you don't want mature now. My personality is way immature. I mean around my friends like close friends really yeah you guys away mature the be on the outside of comedy. I mean we're talking about Dixon Asians Polito fucking. I'm so mature. Sometimes you guys have kids so you're mature yeah. That's fair yeah. So what do you think if no I don't know if I have any friends is that Chen would like he's just not interested. I don't know I don't know what type of girl he likes but I feel like she's in the she somewhere. I don't know where there's like. Maybe three of them in the world fuck three girls sounds like that's the one how your books in full Chin. We don't know but the ones that data have been awesome. They've been can be awesome because you're single spot house younger. Did you get on the dating APPs which was so much tender under. I just don't use it so you're not on me on tinder. I'm never been on there but I don't use it Razz Vulcan. That's not for him now. What's Ray is not there yet right yeah you have to but there are some fucking dude? You need a U._C.. Professionals you do your thing that come over you. Pay Him Dude. I would not mind that to be honest. If I'm like feeling super only seems like the best way just professionals rely on yeah yeah the same one comes over every Friday or Saturday. I mean if you need someone. Let me know the last place I worked at a bunch. That's true she did yeah. I used to hold the phones yeah the last weeks I worked at it was just a bunch of really really well to do men and women who didn't want to have families they don't want to have relationships and they would have escorts and prostitutes. Come up all the time really yeah. I know a lot of them to this day. Most of them are really really good people yeah no. That's the thing a lot of them are in the Bible. You'll meet a heart or they. Were they run usually. What do they run? I don't know how much they run. I think it also depends on what you're looking at. What those people right to do people pay three to five? If if I saw you talking about quality when we started the show I understand but three to five is not I can't just be Brent you solve for five five grand. You'd like Oh yeah no doubt but that's a lot of money for the night five thousand dollars Brian Beautiful Women in my life I have never is not that that much better five bring up five Grand Victoria Cooper's ex that is hot shit but five thousand two old Bradley wouldn't care human pay five barely grocery grant you can go to get you come around. No no absolutely not I three grant Seattle. I'm taking two car dealer female escorts over. I can so that listen. That's that's for the billionaires shit like that now. I'm not I'm talking about. Real People Get Ryan Tanta. The people are in the business in Hollywood. I've seen it dude. Three sexy Japanese slim a big boobs hundred sixty dollars letting Gardena if you're looking forward <hes> Asian amy now here's the problem with a lot of these is they look that you think you're going to get that and they come over and it looks like fucking. Yeah Yeah fucking need help too. That's another sad thing girl goes up and then they come down like five minutes later like you know that they were sent away. That's aw guys get the puck down here. That's I'm like Oh. You're tough GIG man. It's a tough gig yeah. I know a girl who spit in her face she went and he didn't like her and spit in her face and <hes> in Malibu she talking back though no she went to be his escort and she looked Jimmy spinner face yeah and then she had some people go visit him and <hes> oh they killed him yeah yeah they murdered him and the story took an extravagant. Here's a here's the thing though I don't have a problem with this like really hot girls. Who put you too much too much too much effort to much judgment on sex like like all right? I think prostitution is basically legal but it should be legal. Why not I I don't get it done anyway massage by some hot girl but she touches a different part of my body she goes to jail vice laws those outdated vice this old school? I don't have a problem with it. I just think two consenting adults should be allowed to <unk> enter into a transaction. There is a transaction anyone transaction. Let's say I went on a date tonight. Let's say mean cat went out bought cat drink about her. Dinner went to really nice place. It's five hundred dollars and then I got a hotel. It's another grant commit grand that money's money with on give it directly to your pain for an forms of liquor and hotel rooms so it's still it's just so stupid. Yeah that's right yeah. That's that's <hes> there. There are especially as you get older to be made you. I was listening to a sex expert on armchair expert with that Shepherd at a sex expert on there and you have everyone's like oh like these millennials in these young kids so much sat in ridiculous and not true because now not having sex right now well the the entire nation especially the United States having less and less sex especially the younger demo because they have so much access to porn and they're do it themselves now and now like monogamy is really not for them so they might hook up here and there but they're really not fucking with it man and there and everything's about becoming self sufficient and you know they're having bomber because there's not <hes> that connection you're able to do it in the cyber way or something is that what will the porn so good now before you can do chat to a girl or D._M.'s or they send nudes. Do through like jacking up this way or you know so. It's it's going down down. That's a bummer. That doesn't make women happy. That's for damn sure and maybe the limit of the same. You know it's interesting. That's interesting but they talk about like with like <hes>. I don't know how they saw tom about like with with with gay dudes how it's just different for them right like if you're gay man you can go. I mean well. There's areas you can go anywhere in the world in the nature in L._A.. And you go get fucked by four guys and come back and like all right. Where are we getting smoothies true well? There's no there's no gym. There's no restroom where four women are GonNa let you fuck them and then carry on day just doesn't exist now because do testosterone. It's just what they do. It's not that big of a deal truth creepy. He has interesting. There's a creepy that way super yeah. It's an interesting thing somebody asked me talking to people about love and they were asked me to define love like what do you mean. You're in love like when you say you're in love with somebody in a relationship. What does that mean? How do you define it? What does that mean? And how long is it GonNa last. If you ever try to define it. It's a tough thing to define this direction. That's deep there's possession. We are possessive over somebody because that's your Mama Bear. That's your but love is a hard thing to kind of. What's the motivation behind you in a relationship with somebody that you really love them? You guys are obsessed with each other. Love a lot of people yeah. The question is when you say you're in love with somebody. What is if you were to really dissect that? What's that really fucking mean? You know that'd be tough. It'd be tough to define sometimes. Maybe it's best not divide it right so I was thinking about this. The other day like scientists like to reduce shit. There are different ways they break it down and sometimes breaking it down takes the magic out life so let me give you a classic example. I Love Dogs. I love dogs had dogs my whole life. Somebody I heard a scientist there was this article about how dogs are saunters scavengers and pack animals and when they're really friendly with you and they wag their tail that might be how they've evolved to get you to give them food and take care of them if you look at a dog as a self serving animal. That's manipulating you that way. You're not gonNA love dogs the same way when you look at a dog that's just a fucking beautiful creature that makes you smile all that runs after a ball that kids hug and cry when it dies. That's that's that is a truth the like your deep love for your dog which I have is is just as true as what the scientist is describing as why the dog like blown. I'm not that interested in in your definition of a dog. That's not how I look at my dog. It is but that science may not be relevant to me emotionally and it doesn't make my life better actually your understanding. I guess the deep scientific mathematical dramatic motivations of a dog and we'll scientifically explained like things you can't really quantify we'll quantify faith any religion Gimme the formula I should believe in Jesus Christ there you go any religious who's a public intellectual will say things like we have to science has to destroy religion. Well okay until he does so you lose a child and then what was your. How are you going to help me with your science dude? I told you I Taiwan and that's not that much of a religious person. This is well documented a Deis your son I believe in a God but I'm a certain religion I don't believe Jesus Christ stuff deities deism so <hes> but when my son got AH issues first thing I did start praying faulk yeah youtube first thing doing any what's the first thing I did before I hit that curtain start praying fuck yes there. Is someone up there. Please help me out here that there's no no atheists in in a foxhole foxhole meaning like would you hope for your about your in a war with a waiting you until you've been in those situations. There is a reason that you you when you're helpless when you have no options. When science isn't there for you you start fucking privileged? Science can explain that feeling you get when inspiration no not that they definitely GonNa explain that but science can explain that thing where it goes. I want to do that Brennan. I'd go here. I went into it like that little thing in in your brain gone. I wouldn't do that yeah. I definitely when do that yeah. Hey man you're in trouble so China's he'd get ready. You're going to be in trouble. Jonathan Hyde who's a psychologist talks about this exact thing he goes. Human beings are intuitive so it's not you don't just you not just immoral. You're not just moral because it causes harm so the ideas <unk>. I'm a moral person 'cause I don't WanNA cause any harm but we also have weird intuitions like where we used. These really fucked up examples. A woman takes an American flag cuts up in a bunch of pieces and cleanser bathroom with it. We don't like that somebody takes a shit on a sacred battlefield at your nation was founded on. We don't like that <hes> Somebody Fox a chicken comes in it cooks the chicken and eats it. Nobody gets hurt a Vegan a woman she's. She's got a job cremating bodies in a in a thing she goes you know this is a perfectly good waste of meat. Guys is about to go into incinerator. She cuts a piece of style takes. It home cooks at needed. Nobody got hurt but we all go the code. We love brother and sister there in the woods. Nobody can see it. He wears a condom. She's on birth control. They faulk. Nobody knows about it. They're hot but but we have an ugly even though nobody got harmed technically Lou. It's still not it's still it's still listen tab disgust response from Tabah why well that's that's that intuition. Human beings are fucking intuitive and if you WANNA talk that's how people vote to go. I don't like a lot of people were like. I just don't like Hillary Clinton Donald Trump one two. There's something about it. I don't trust her. What is it about her? You ever meet people where you go. I just don't trust that person. I just don't and I had that I'm usually fucking right. There's something about person where I'm like. I just don't I don't believe you. I don't know why but I don't believe you know they're gonNA turn around and walk away. Talk Shit or something or you're asking Euro Dan Nice to me because you want and that intuition is very important. Listen to Oh. It's everything it is. Some people call it. STREET-SMART ROGAN had a fucking riff yesterday on astrology because we did stand up on the spot astrology and he goes. Is it bullshit he goes you just WanNa pattern like he went through this whole thing about how he talks really smart science. I don't want to give away because he might turn into a bit but it was so good because it was like astrologists for people who want a pattern of predictable pattern to live but there's nothing wrong with that. It's human but you can't predict live. Life isn't a pattern by his fucking though random it's random yeah. He was really funny last night improvising heels to giant dawn. Can you help me pull this thing out. Because I guess man I got them all tied down my leg. He's been really unruly lately. You give intuition. I got a bad feeling about this dawn. Jay Brennan Bryce Yeah Man you know what's funny is over. You can go see Brian Spokane. He can see me in Cincinnati or what I would probably rather do. I'd rather go see the new movie Stu Bar. You know what I'm saying. Stupor STU bursts to will cost lost to borrow okay but it's tuber. You're always mispronounce. Everything I do man the Kamal in it who's hilarious the day Batista in it and so damn good. He's a good actor. It looks so funny man the trailer if he has seen it holier Laris definitely go check it out you guys know from silicone valley you know Dave Batista from Guardians of the Galaxy plus in this movie and in real life there. B._F._F.'s ought to know that I didn't know they were actually best. That's how the movie came together Manson Yep. That's true so get excited. 'cause they're really together now. Buckle up for the ride of your live like the Brian Cowen Brennan Shaab of big screen. They're like the find the kid of the silver screen. That's exactly what they are. You're a giant professional wrestler and I'm a fucking fucking artist actor. Maybe I guess either way go see Stupor arrives in theaters July twelfth. Go see it yeah. Hey be you know what man I might vote for Bernie Sanders or or Org because he's getting rid of student loans or you know what I'm GonNa. Do you know what I'm GonNa. Do you GONNA get a real private long do ernest. I'm talking about Ernest design a private student loan for actual students into nineteen. I mean you can apply on your phone dude. They customize low terms low interest rates no fees. They'll give you three extra months complicate add do it's less comic because a lot of kids can't afford college scholarships. Okay Okay Ernest. This is not a private student loan for actual students in two thousand. I mean you can apply totally on your phone. You you have customizable loan terms. Low interest rates no fees. They also give you three extra months nine months total. After leaving school to start paying back your private student loan and Ernest private student loans can cover up one hundred percent of your schools cost of attendance. Is it impossible like take nine hours a lot cheaper. Were that's the thing you don't have to have a finance degree for it and also I'll tell you something else. The Internet loves Ernest Low Customer Service. They gave it a nine point four out of ten on trust pilot. I love it. It's a two minute eligibility. Check you can invite a cosigner if you choose to and apply Yup and guess what the School New Year is approaching fast so the fire kidde listeners get one hundred dollars cash bonus when you get a private student loan at Ernest Dot com slash fighter. That's one hundred dollar cash bonus. You get a private student loan at Ernest Dot com slash fighter better and you can see the terms conditions on the site go to ernest dot com slash fighter today. Don't let student loan stand in your way take control with Ernest E. A. R. N. E. S. T. dot com slash fighter to drain that thing saying I don't know just current. Have you been watching things no. I don't watch that dumb show Oh really yeah but my daughter is upset anyone else in your watch it ninety more US watch. I might be the best season as a man. I'm done really so done. So should I watch it. I don't care be honest. Don't that's a great answer right washed large did so well done scary Nah. I'm thirty six men not very scary but it's scary show. It's just a really well done show. It's really really cool but you four is. The Shit finally caught up last night euphoria on H._B._O.. I don't know you want to talk about pushing the limit. What is your shot well? It's with the Daya Girl Zendaya. She's gorgeous yeah. She plays a drug addict and actress yeah but there's there's this transgender girl in this as well. It's just I mean there's a lot of Dixon this thing. Maybe I like it but there's like then. There's this married man. WHO's fucking transvestite like there's a lot going on a real life schick on dude? It's Yeah I've never ever seen something like this and it's a diving deep deep cuts into the the lives of like drug addicts and transsexuals. It's so well done men gambling some good T._v.. Out there man yeah the show so goddamn good and that the the things Ndiaye in dance she could really do it on. She's such a monster nine hundred originally from Oakland billion fans on instagram the transgender girl on the left real transgender clouds like Oh. Is that like Doc <hes> Girl Dude that was due. That's now of female but that's that's a real life is because I watched like behind the things thing because that's trying to figure out is that a female playing a transgender or is a mail plane. That's a real transgender under female. WHO's an actor a little rules for them? You know so she definitely yeah. It's very interesting. An individual's Joe's all right old is she. I don't know dude why I just twenty hunter Schafer's real name. When did she get transgender woman? She's known for her role as Gills H._B._O.'s drama she's really really good man. Brindley really really frigging good. You know who else is in the show is <hes> Judd uptown daughter. Jane have like a big role but she's in it. You dig the show. That's it's super interesting because I've never seen some shit like does you know drug addicts and transgender in highschool and hooked him up with married man crazy ship all right okay all right first one. You guys know about this. I think more kind of video you of it so it's Howard Stern is in two thousand thirteen. You guys know this. I'm Alyssa Howard Stern damning every day. I'm a huge Howard stern fan so this one kind of bums me out but it's like he's doing when they first went to sears or somebody's like doing a company retreat and he's talking up there and God he's so cocky and saying how you know how he may Jerry Seinfield and how they should create fake accounts go back. Maybe this is a yeah so the the scf across what's happened to the pilot. Theresa may not be the meanest called the summit which he didn't thirteen where we're gone and how we're getting there the self proclaimed King of all media well. That's what he is. <hes> Jason was only slate which the shock jock claim to have created notoriety you after regular Billy Corgan even referenced no director. This is the core smashing Hopkins Hopkins Yeah not the fucking documentaries yeah. You just see the part that I saw. It's just a bummer. If you're fucking Howard stern fan like it's so Hollywood where he was like so anti Hollywood keep scrolling down he <hes> somebody puts out a rock book Iraq record. We are the place to go. The police don't think or care about some do but most don't we get the same results but we don't have a book club. He's referring to Oprah he's saying he's just as big as oprah but what's we are new and it's all true right I mean in other words his his influence in his ability to get you exposure is one hundred percent of fact as far as the bragging about it that sucks yeah but look he was Adam Levine Otis he was a nobody was looking for before the voice it yeah I think the the bummer is just key imagined rogin sort of him sort of bragging about his influence but he also goes like he goes he. was you know every slur does my show says the best they've ever done. It just like very like it's just a bummer. If you're stern fin then yeah well it might be the match nations behind like a lot of times. You don't WanNa see how sausages made but you like sausage they again. You have to be a bit of a killer. My experience with people like this is their killers behind the scene the killers I mean they they they get like Tom Hanks one time said I let people think I'm a nice guy but but he's getting what he wants. You know you're you're. You're getting good. Have you heard about Ellen Ellen Yeah. Oh you savage dude of Sabah by the way hey just doesn't mostly at all the most savage there's no room for she'll rip your fucking head off but Barbara Dance. Hey let's give out this is but dude on a behind scenes. They say she is a murderer but she knows what she wants and she knows how to get there and I've heard that too. She's not <hes> that worked with her nightmare but Barbara streisand was always known to be difficult but Barbara size when we walk in the snow attracting go get rid of the second horn. What how'd you know? He's not doing his job. I don't need that you want to be in Barbra streisand. You have to be the best of the best that guy socks. That's a little different different though I don't know which is the bummer yeah well. I think he's a guy who is still doing it at a high level because he's got a holy can never fill and that requires a certain amount of uncompromising getting difficult. <hes> you know I'm. I'M GONNA get even because you're snubbing me but that's what drives him but he was always like Hollywood then when you listen to this Ray <hes> dude. I used to be against all this stuff. Stop now. You're you. You've become that yeah. I don't know I'm still future van pray. I never listened to him. I don't know much about him. I've never listened to one of these amazing. Listen to one interview and it was really good with Bill Maher but I need to get it but that was so okay so good yeah. The talk was just like Oh man of the bummer real bummer. What can he suggested that his people make fake twitter accounts to get the word out at Hampton right? You know his voice sounds. I really really like Crispin and deepen everything he he does on a purpose to he has a specific Mike very expensive -til Mike all really does accused compressive stern wait so it sounds like so his voice is you all you hear is yes voice like the guests sounds whatever but his is very lighten it like ingrained in your mind. Wow that's smart yeah. I mean if you've ever been a serious which I have. He has his own floor. Now I mean he he's he's he's ownership and serious yeah. I was thinking about the amount of hate he must've got when he went from terrestrial radio to payment structure serious yeah he must have got so much fucking hate. I guess you know he doesn't really do a social media and stuff like that and he he tried to do like a a facebook live or read it live and that is on the for two minutes with like holy like this is so talked out read it. Is I get people. Tell me don't go on Reddit Dude. You get fucking a lot of hate. I'm like I don't give a faulk. I don't I won't go on Reddit. Don't worry but I also I don't care what are you. You don't know me I do the best I can to be good but also I mean I mean. Are you on Reddit create accounts against those people that are you know because you're a famous actor comedian making millions of dollars. No no one's who successful on Reddit do writing bullshit. Do you know anyone who's successful that got on a the comet and wrote something negative about. I don't read it and especially you've done a podcast. You've done anything one comic. I Have Seen Kevin Hart John Do that Bucket Stock Bill Burr or Rogan when Oh you don't care that for the sheep sheep do what does he at first one she would describe it. I sent this cat so some beautiful young lady and her boyfriend sent this to me. There's a real monkey problem out here whereas this play it. This is Mike Rapport posted this by the way so monkey attacks on people I guess happened more and more frequently increase in problem Al northern India check that off the list I would fuck and I would come there. Get them. I'd get a bat and bash those fucking monkeys in their head teaching kids. I'll tease him with the fuck losses so far to see how this guy has a terrible problem but here they go oh shit Oh shit oh shit and then they knocked down the bite them and their teeth would fuck in her. I heard all right. Let me let me grab you motherfucker. This makes me angry. Does it YEP. I'll fucking kick you in the face you dumb monkey motherfucker three hundred eighty six monkey attacks last year all right good who'd died as a result of the Oh shit. It was imagine if you have kids but I would fuck in. I just get myself a twenty two and shoot ads A._B.. Do I'm telling you there's a real coyote problem where I live dude at four in the morning they get together and it's like Lion King. They shout out the top of their lungs on outside them. I've been killing someone's dog. 'cause I heard a very loud cry that went away and then all the counties Oregon kill. Those monkeys easily problem is that they <hes> habitat is is fucked up what else a problem in India you know what else comes in tigers and cobras leopards tigers the big problem in India yeah but not in the big city leopards because it leopards they come because I know they have a tiger problem too yeah. Tigers and alligators are the real. Have you seen how many people from alligators in Florida you mean. I don't know why house looking this up no over the word dude crocodiles alligators crocodiles real problem rocket house. Don't do a real problem yeah type in fucking Liberty Tax Indian villages Jesus Christ but <music> alligator tax or crocodile tax crocodiles alligators bid our big problem in Africa Doo from all over and they I mean they're vicious. Dude that two year old town terrified of crocodiles you sure man. It's a real fucking problem worldwide timeout thousands of attacks dude thousands. Oh yeah this well over five thousand tax half of them are dead on Oh really yeah because they will kill you do the real problem. I didn't realize how bad two hundred and six it's a saltwater talk through five hundred and five look at it so just last year alone over a thousand alligator crocodile attacks in America dead Egypt the Nile six down in the middle of Africa's six hundred ninety three scroll overdid controller in America in on that map Jn saltwater crocodile because the rest thousand two hundred and sixty four. Did you know that big of a problem. I didn't know I was watching. I forget I was watching something like fucking C._n._N.. Or some shit for nineteen fatal deaths last year from what the total crocodiles do hold on. Where do I see that in America Yup? That's America right there. Well then it goes down to Mexico down there really well. That'd be a hundred and eight hundred nine Lord alone. His mouth is working correctly which ninety nine where's that that's Florida. Dude look at all that those are crocodiles since Yep <hes> two thousand thirteen all attacks outcome nonfatal real problem. Though isn't it faulk yeah. I never thought that big of a deal now listen if I'm anywhere in that side of the the United States. You Ain't seen anybody of wires. There's nothing I don't know if this is just for that twenty eighteen just like all over the place yeah. You know what I'm saying. Fuck Khimprom what else you got in the next one yep okay so uber is now gonNA have a new system in place where you can go to Uber Comfort which is going to be for or they're higher end cars where you can put on quiet mode. Whether you don't WanNa have a conversation with the driver you're open to having conversation or you. Don't have a preference as well as what temperature. You're going to want the car to be whether you want a cold or a little warmer her <hes> what whether you want music playing or not as well as whether yeah they're putting a lot of really great things into Uber like helping you with your luggage from the airport little things like that or if you want a car that has <hes> more legroom in the back act for you. You're a bigger person see my thing is. I don't want to help with my luggage. I'm not I'm not chick. I don't want my luggage to open the back. Don't talk to me put on music. That's my ideal Uber and give me their the also dropped me off not at the passionate drop off drop me off at a rivals drive a little faster than spiel illegal now that's why they don't do it some doing though but also faster but also dry fast I I like <hes> fast right and nobody stupid what else you guys drive fertility clinic so crazy. Oh God what happened here. This is there's a couple from New York who couldn't get pregnant and they ended up going to this fertility clinic one of the best ones here in California and all over the country they ended up finding out that when she gave birth she gave birth to two beautiful boys that were not Asian and the couple was Asian both ration- white kids they don't. They don't know they don't specify what the kids were but they were not Asian. Both parents are Asian. They pay to have their embryos. Embryos placed into the woman but they accidentally put two embryos from two different people into her technically relate to i._v._F.'s Taibbi F._e._M._a. to deposit them out bust busting up deposit <unk> a busted in it and when I left thought I wonder if they keep that and use it with other people. We'd have no idea the question of course they healthiest flop Max so what happens to them well right now. They're suing because one and she carried the children to term to. She had to give the children back to the biological. The biological parents also didn't know that this was going to happen so now they both have kit have sons and if you could if you're looking for a job we'll take this now. They are your child yeah. It's crazy so now they're suing the clinic for emotional damages. Everything's Yeah and in house they're trying to figure out what happened with their embryos because they actually wanted to have girls in originally when they extracted embryos that they were going to use they specifically chose just girls but the wife hurt something a little odd when they put embryos inside her because they said these are they referred to the embryos as boys and she just Kinda Shrug it off. She didn't think too much of it. The day of she ended up having two boys that were not Asian. That'd be so heartbreak how that's nine monster nine months to the I v F to look into it with my girl because we're going to have twins before he made it happen naturally two games on point two boys who wants kids who wants a boy. I'll bust lost in your face so it's a it's really expensive. Be The success rating great on those I._B._S.. or it's very expensive every time you have to do it my doctor such a tool to GBS A._B._C. Yeah he did. My Buddy told him oh my buddy stem cells in his shoulder shoulders and he'd he'd been paying for like fifteen years. He goes dude. It's two years now. It's been gone completely. It really does work. Hold on give me saying yeah no two thousand sixteen with stems really yeah. Oh yeah no no no no Brian just found that could no probably yeah your friend. Joe Rogan's been doing it for seven years. Okay thank you but every fighter in every athlete I know does it click but I didn't know now what they're doing. Though is there's a new procedure. That's going to get like approved. They're taking the amniotic fluid from a woman's like second trimester or something those stem cells <music> become yours. If you get they'll shoot you in your bloodstream and they can mutate into becoming yours and they become anything that you want them to be so they they they will be whatever you need them to be. Essentially it's Kinda crazy so there's this is the news yeah yeah that's go hair. Loss hair loss hair loss hair loss and get on that whole daddy is a little sore in achey pushing a little hard with the boxing slash. Lifting shoulders are given out. Are they given even out little off their achey. My my shoulders are aching. You see deal dude yeah. They're hurting inflammation C._B.. Deal Yeah. I know a guy owns a company warm up better to do that our Nada de you know it's just as part of being fifty two CD would definitely help with that inflammation day all day all right. I'll take only have <hes> what else we got so there is a new trend of people doing bigger and Better Jenna reveals and there's one gender reveal the happened in Australia that went wrong and it's going to reveal things always weird. Mike Rotunda doing general reveal with our new Kiddo. Do throw a how does that work. The mom knows but the father does so so no one knows but the doctor so you can pay for it right. It's like two hundred dollars more and they do the blood and then they go on to do with the results and we said send it to her brother. Stephen I the whole throw the surprise birthday but it means surprise Jenna reveal all we want him just as he went well. Should we wait to the weekend. They're like a big reveal parliament now. Fuck no as soon as you find out a text me what it is and I'll pretend I'm surprised be come over with a blue cupcake or pink cupcake and that's what we did the video of you finding that you're pregnant doing what first time the first time to dubs so as long ago as I got done to do tonight. Am I getting blown up on my grandma quick fuck man and she's like where yeah we out my chill bits to get back and she's like well. I have news they strange. I go like this to one time I go. Hey Hey listen you guys are just dating. Don't be getting her pregnant. I know how you are don't be getting all romantic and the Annenberg just fucking just take it easy. What's work to be done and I just saw you this thing to me? Something's GonNa Happen fucking a month later but what else how about how about when I you know she calls her. She's Mexican Shit. She calls her family. They flip out there. Crime like coal mine now. Let Me Call Mine hit my dad my dad. My Dad didn't know my girl at the time at all so I go dad grandma Grandpa we got one on the way and you share silence. It's on speaker science out well. You know you don't have to go through something like that. Thank you you sound you sound real. I will say you knew you knew you're listening just walking around now. She started crying. He's just joking. No He's funny like meat. No He's joking joking all right that thank you know how those things are going to tell. My mother is the best I'm getting married. I'm driving. I'm telling I'm getting married dude. I'm looking for a ring and it's like big news. Your only son is getting married. She goes well be careful because there are a lot of fake diamonds out. There and some of the diamonds are so fake. Even who are you fucking the way that you're worried about that. Shave heartbreaking up you know Jay doesn't get up for anything. You may be an uncle. I got a kid on the way I should get a text back cool. That's great well well. Some families are just not at Samuel or sometimes. You just don't know what you're expected to be. A bigger deal like grown up or more. Show was the car my family so I bought a porsche for anyone else. I call my dad on Spirit Papa. He's like yeah. I'm like your your son. Just bought a nine eleven Carreira <hes> and he goes silent silent. You get the get the turbo or is it. The is it the s no just obey small well one day well how close had a girlfriend who had a father who fucked a lot of different women and once a year all all the brothers and sisters who came from different MOMS would get together was this guy was all like yeah you see him he was he was hitting. My girlfriend was such a stud back. In the day. She was just like this. She was Mexican and Spanish and and her father was I fuck and Spanish conquistador a Spanish matador stud barrel barrel chested muscular and obviously women loved them so one of the things that his his brother says he can throw a fucking from his knees he was a catcher and can throw a ball like fuck into the outfield just really big and strong just an Alpha male so he's all the kids would be there and I came for all the family reunion and there was one brother who was so desperate to have a family and he would try to make he would go guys. I think is hosting guys listen. We don't see each other that much. We're family. We Love You Dad. Dad Thank you for being here all right drinks and all of a sudden he goes all right guys man. It's so good app you guys hey. Let's do this students again. All right so like dessert comes guys. It's quite a toast dad. Hey John we get and we get it then. Everything's all great around here. We don't need another toast all right we can. He literally shut this fucking guys probably thirty five is not the guy marriages sweet as she never got talk to my girl go. What was he like? He's show up once a year and have some presence and that's how we all grew up with him. He just wanted a dad. That's hilarious. So how did they anyway. They do bill so they had special tires that would then produce this like blue or pink smoke and they drove their hyped about it putting it on social media exploded because of Jesus Christ yeah they ended up running into grab the passenger and the driver. No one was hurt. The driver ended up being arrested for it because he did this on just a regular street in Australia. Life is funny man. We'll it's like what did you do. The the one cup couple did the gender reveal party that started all the forest fires they show it here to did you see that one generally parting shots seeing fires and that was one of the reasons who had horrible files or how about yes that's going on. Remember the horrible fire centers on gender reveal party this and that started like a motherfucker look forty seven thousand acres burned eight million dollars in damages Jesus that kids can be like Jesus Christ Dead Phoenix but name the kid when the Great Name Oh my God I'd so the kids singed Ligo Phoenix is good though especially the from I made a wildfire spark. I kid damage just life man. How about that couple again? They're crazy cars. You know what you're doing. It's a bummer but it's life is funny. It happened years ago so now it's funny couple got married without front celebrating. Oh the GRANDPA bottom is dream. Cartha Viper all cool five hundred horsepower power five hundred pounds of Torque six-speed not really a car for newbie gets in it wife who's GonNa catch no all both dead. aww Fuck you fucking span. That'd be the end. The story is going to be able to go fuck to your whole like fuck no from happy to your life just like what the fuck to the end zone he died like together and very famous famous fucking story about the two brothers who carry their mother all the way to forty miles that did this show their love their mother to the temple so she can pray and got got ask her. What what do you want for your son? You know for your two sons. She goes from my two sons. Never to suffer a day in their life and the sons took a nap and they never woke up from the NAPA and that's well. That's what you ask. I don't know what sparked this. It's so so random but when I come back from vacation we flew in on united flew back on Delta so I fucking parked my car at United Landon Delta you gotTa Walk from Terminal Three To terminal seven while Mama with me. I got my son Tiger with me so I made them walk but I'm holding all their luggage and it's one hundred degrees out. We're walk in my son my girls all my son home in which taking turns and then something. I don't know why this is so ran down the story but I started. I'll I'll like the refugees field up from Mexico like walking. I think I'm taking all my shoulder learning so bad and three hundred hundred manufacturer is and I'm home my son on I got all the luggage and I'm sweating profusely at every day for them. I went I went you know how they probably got about shoes then then though because I was complaining and then I wouldn't this mindset Mike fucking refugee here we go through my girl goes why so serious so it'd be like complaining about being a refugee right now crossing the border. That's why I hired a coyote to get us across the fuck but you know what dude let me tell you what they call. The empathizing also one of the things my shoulders Birla thought thinking mom had to fuck in and they do all their shit so my thing. What would I get rid of my bag if I was in? What would I get rid of? What what do I have in there that I wouldn't want to carry yeah triumphant and my my wife went down to the border with a bunch of people to help the kids? This dude pushed his daughter has multiple sclerosis for three months in a wheelchair and was sleeping whether because they wouldn't separate them because they couldn't and she was looking in his eyes and she was like this is what this fucking do did and say whatever are you about the border and stuff. I don't illegal immigration problem and we do need humane what we're doing well and so what I'm saying. Is that when you when you think about one of these about educating yourself about the world about history it makes you more compassionate it just because you go you know what what I did. I did I stop right my tracks or an Uber X and fucking guys over at A._C.. That's right. I call service whack not today. I went straight to my very wealthy friend who was in. They fucked up the names. They're in this huge is line and Miami like this crazy it was it was like it was going to be a day wait and he's got money and he goes well. I'M GONNA spend fifty four thousand dollars Joe. We have the same front man you know that's what triggered like I was going like you can't stop now on a sledding the being a Mexican immigrant yeah yeah and I took my shoes off and started walking barefoot and there you go and that's legit and the more you learn about the history the more the more you learn about the world and how people have to live like in Syria wherever wherever it might be it does make a lot more humane it makes you more compassionate than Chinese makes you work great mud Chinese a lot of Chinese people there no no. It's just like all compact like sardines this yeah yeah wherever mad just like two different ethnics gotcha ethnicities Gotcha your shape shifter to put myself in their shoes. You know got you shape shifter now. Are you a closet racist or you. I'm pretty out about it. You know okay okay. I'm going to have to cast with this this right here. So Jaden Smith this weird you bring him up why keep keep going all right okay so he just turned twenty one this past Sunday and he has been getting into a lot of different philanthropy. Pick <hes> causes. He has a water company called just water. He's donated a couple of water filter <hes> systems to Flint Michigan Shitload a shit yeah. He's really help Flint Michigan really really helping out. It's really cool yeah on Sunday for his birthday. He actually bought out a food truck called it. The I love you restaurant and he fed people on skid row fresh vegan meals. He's he's really a fastening kid. He <hes> he's a huge musician off sees the son of Will Smith and Jaden Smith but what is philanthropy. Lamp tree work like you're talking about with the water and this stuff. It's pretty cool man. He eats a lot of Hay but he's also huge. I kissed his one song. They came out with has been streamed over one hundred million times like he's a talented artists. He's you know he's into fashion like he's Kinda doing his own thing man. Yeah it's pretty cool. It's so weird you brought this up yesterday on this weird rabbit hole last night like two in the morning on Jaden Smith Good Looking Kid. I see him a lot him in his daughter super good. I mean his sister super good looking beautiful but it's interesting with it. Just how damned good will smith is it social media like what you can learn from these guys I went to will Smith instagram and I went to youtube page and he's so good at it man. He's so damn good. Eh Flannigan Smith man it. Was You know I got I 'cause I will Smith posted was I can't believe Jason's twenty-one and posted a video and I kind of teary-eyed because my son was a video when Jane was like two to twenty one and he's I Jane's on his shoulders. It's so fucking cute man. Let's see it's so cute. It's it's the middle one that various yep we're seeing he was in pursuit of happiness. Look there is that Oh that's just for a second job by the way never acted before. It was awesome in it until you you can't do you know how you got that Gig. They couldn't find the role and he goes Papa. I'll do it got a dream. You got to protect it. People can't do something themselves. They WanNa tell you you can't do it want to see this movie. We will bring you to tears seen it now. It's a true story live bro Masol because he's that movie will make you cry special. If you have kids will Smith show aw dude. Don't give me so. I'm GONNA watch tonight. I'm GonNa Watch tomorrow and stroke crime. He's so good right. That's it'll be go back. Chin Kid is so cute. How did he soak keeps going down? Maybe scroll up there was a montage yells a coal video him of his son and it was so quarterback this guy probably how is yeah. Oh yeah there you go look at this tiger right now. Jaden <music> is one hundred percent views elsie artists and create a little artists on really surprised and drought and terrified of how he space zero due he sells a shitload of tickets to go. I can dance Dance Shit Him and his dad first time they've performed together. It's so cool man you can dance dot life goes fast man. The kid is he's so cute that cool though by the way <hes> Jaden his wife Jada Pinkett Smith Pink. She doesn't look like she takes a shit. Either by Rashi surrounds a house with Eh. She's killing it to her new show via the red table shoot that from will's house okay the daughter to willow willow. Yes she's your girl. How old is she? I wanted gee like nineteen. She's good good guard. Look at the arch draws. She's Super Gorgeous. She dressed Super M._o.. Fry Stop it if she wants to. Shut the game down yeah she all. She showed she was like Oh. You WanNA put on unaddressed. She lets us all she could have been such a huge pop star too because she had one hit when she was younger. She didn't WanNa do it anymore. They don't want well. Why I mean Jaden is doing the damn thing James Jr fashion? Do you know what screw who could. How old is she before all right? We're good but you know what's crazy about Jaden. Is You know he was. She's eighteen this legal with I don't want that sounds creepy but with jade and you know he was the the model for the Louis Vuitton female female yeah I think he's considered Pan Sexual. Whatever the case? I like it all going to find me mother fuckers what else you got to go with this Melik McDowell. He's played for the sale seahawks. <hes> this is a cop. I guess he was just driving down the street. WHO's a snowy day and then he spun out of control so the COP wanted to pull them over and I guess test them and he was just being like get away from him while your supervisor says supervisor a million times the N._F._l.? Player yeah. It's a very long video so just show you parts of it so this is one of the over supervisor so he was drunk because you wanted to times us over two times the legal limit so he was drunk he was drunk. Yeah so is speeding so I'll just show you the parts that are interesting here. Thank you stores Catholic huge. WE'RE GONNA Portland up the cops trying to trip him. You'd like teasing this giant man. Check this out. He's lucky to shoot them. aww grow them right now. You'll see you'll countdown. Make your two cups the fence. He's worn them several times. Is there any way you could just have wait till the cops. His friends come doc so he stays home now. Check this out doesn't care. He's lucky didn't shoot them there the size of these enormous he's so lucky this cop shoot on. Here's I know he is but he's not like hitting the COP. He's just like I get away from a getaway. Do a damn thing for big guys. TASERS AIn't GonNa do shit that just got mad and then check out the backup arrives. I'm sure they tiny to our be so bummed out yeah if he wanted to do anything he he doing. He's smart enough not to be fighting. Let him just sit there. They have gone. I will let him sit there. Just let them sit. Sit there because he's done this before too. He's been like super against lucky. You didn't get shot though yeah luckily the free agent I would've said Bro. Come on please see three hundred pounds and insanely athletic twenty-three Peyser went you guys talk pulls the beer what interesting if those cops have guns they could not stop him. Do seven of them can stop no they couldn't but broke they have to have. That's nuts that TAT fucking tasers did shit off fuck all to him. He got up. It was a real taste to not the one that you just put on Tom. Maybe didn't WANNA skin. It might have just hit US clothing. I think this guy is really strong clothing yeah. They can't not bearskin they shoot through anything. Those things go wow what a bad ass you see when the tasers cops right they do to cup so they know what they're doing and they shake and shits his pants. No that's obvious he starts laughing. When I shit my pin you tell you not to eat before like the night before for this Guy Peed Engines Pontiac in front one of his buddies? Oh boy he was her. They stopped shooting and he starts laughing blown away. That guy just went. He looked get this shit off and out of different finding could've gotten shot though that's the problem cannot do that before too before it's a kind of should deal with all the time thank God. They have a huge ego. I would've been thank God for that. Cop Shot that car and I haven't felt because like yeah I would have been with that. I would have been all right. Sit there. Just calm down. Please stomach my job public. Dude a Shitload of people come in you know you're interested right right. Jill there yeah right what else next this one right rocky very very famous rapper whose in Sweden and then the first video came out looks like him and his crew were beaten up these two guys right so I'll show you a little bit of this. I accept Rocky Fan Yeah Yeah. He does everything right. I think so you'll see right around here. They're being up these guys right. He's actually rocky toss. In this dude Tammy toss the fuck punching. They're in Sweden yeah yeah but what were those guys doing yes so they ace team released their own video of what how the semen started and these guys constantly beryllium like just following them and just annoying them like like call him the n word or not. They just seems like he's just on drugs or something. Turn it up. They said we don't want any problems in the just keep following them key following them and then they actually this dude the one that's the closest he throws his headphones at the bodyguard this way the real face we will have to have bodyguard this. Oh Wow so this guy's trying to hit the body art those headphones out him. Ah Fuck that dummy up who'd a piece of shit he's again. He's like that bodyguards cool was that little dude think's going to happen. We're not you know listen. We don't WANNA fight. I'm not trying to trying to deescalate the situation. Is that Bryce wow you hit him with. The headphones in these guys are Turkish and these guys are fans of ace at. I don't know that Swedish these guys are immigrants the immigrants from somewhere in the Middle East. I think I don't know what's going on and why this they just won't leave them alone and then some other witnesses come by the speak their language and tell town the key so they're falling the body right now dudes bad people are fucking ear and then he walks back and the guys I still come out. I'm again so these are the women are the ones that translate for them to east. We're bodyguards out of shape. He's take him on his head does cross our Somalia uh-huh Shimmy through the headphones. We think that is what is this. I can't even you can't I can't you can't do that now. You can't do you be <music> sued up the Union. That's why pay bodyguards so he's at Brock. You got involved. It'd be tough not to though not just a fucking punching hardest on especially in international territory so that last guy doesn't the witness he goes those guys one. One of them slapped my ass and my girlfriend's ass last time so they're troublemakers for sure right and now because of this shit as Rockies Joe what the hell they're going to hold on for two weeks or supposed to withhold for three days Max but the only for two weeks so so frustrating and it's apparently they said there's rumors that it's really really crappy situation there the but his lawyer says not that bad but still he's held there. That's so teams held there too. If you WANNA get put in jail sweet that's so jacked up but he's in jail with a lot if people from not from Sweden yes so Sweden so Sweden took in a lot of immigrants from the Middle East Asep. I tried his best signs. He's in jail and not the other guy the Guy Jones. Did you see the guy fucking. We've been aspirin drunk fan fucking been asked him before his fight now trying to eat like fuck that kind of stuff. Let's end on this kind of stuff so exhausted. This shit makes me want to take those dudes the heads in this this dude exhausting exhausting. He just wants to poke barons one quick last thing imagine being just like a dude move. What is that? Is that Calvin if you know the new I'm talking about the movie. It's a shame it's a terrible name that she thinks it's a moth with tentacles and hair on tracks like that too remorseful God. What is something called Genghis moth? Does it bite all all the hurts people don't like it. I don't kill any animals. I let my son 'til animals they kill this dude fuck and centipede like one of those big Joe Centipedes had to kill him. They should all die. I had to kill you. Kill a centipede step on am I saying it's possible because we don't kill Papua fat thing and I just can't use my bugasalt to slaughter flies Arkansas then another fucking one that kills big bugs or really shoot shoot salt hard. I I mean fucking Har- Doesn't send you hear the Schuch shook you hear shook shook in my house. A flies going to fucking die. I want flies here. Flies Windows I worship the devil that makes sense speaking of Washington the devil in Cincinnati this Friday and Saturday two shows Friday to show Saturday funny ball and some revived come on out since I'll be my Pete Rose Red's Jersey with the sleeves get off Dick Hanging out the Front Cincinnati natty funny bone Friday Saturday with Derek Assan and then next weekend. I'm in India at the helium in Indianapolis and then Nashville Zanies August first through the third those tickets showed out and then also almost sold out Portland August fifteen to the seventeenth so get your teeth right now k. dot com cincy see this weekend. Be Your favorite spots Spokane Dan tomorrow the Eleventh Friday the twelfth Saturday.

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