Mini-Ep 47: Pardon My French


Today's episode is brought to you by baked by Melissa. So dory. Yes. I know it feels like it was just New Year's Eve, but it's officially February. And you know, what that means? Right. I don't know Kate. What does that mean? Dory. It is a fishery the season of love, aka Valentine's Day, while I know not everyone is a romantic like, I am. I'd say a lot of people enjoy an excuse to receive chocolate or baked goods, right? I would say that's correct now I do love a good cupcake. And we are fortunate enough to have partnered with the delicious bite sized cupcake company baked by Melissa Kate. Let me tell you these cupcakes have been everything my pregnancy. Craving body has wanted. They're not very cute. But so tasty all their cupcakes are unique and handcrafted two with eight original flavors. Seasonal collections? Like, they're red velvet milk chocolate vanilla cream for February and the mini of the month. There are so many options to choose from. 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That's baked by Melissa dot com slash fiber. Thirty-five promo code over thirty five now, please note the last day for standard shipping nationally for Valentine's Day is February twelfth at two pm eastern. And here's the show. Hello. Welcome to forever. Thirty-five a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I am Doria freer. I am Kate Spencer. We're not experts. Nope. Just two friends who like to talk about serums and welcome to another Minneapolis owed where we take your emails and voicemails and answer your questions to the best of our ability of our bills and adore. If you want to reach us. I don't know why directed that. It you Dorie if you wanted calling in. This is throw your voice, look if you would like to leave us a voicemail, the numbers, seventy one five nine one zero three nine zero and our E mail is forever. Thirty five podcast at g mail dot com. Nicely done K. I was nervous, but it all worked out. So let's hear a voicemail. All right. I'll we shall we kick things off like voicemail. Let's kick a door. Here. We go hiking Doria the cast. And I was just listening to the most recent episode where somebody wrote in about fired I had to call right away. I was in this same situation couple of months ago. And it really shook me I loved my job. I was shocked to fired and my job was so much of my entity. So it was really hard for me. And I totally empathize. The solicitor. It's so hard not to have your self confidence. Shaken in a situation like this. And just now coming out the other side, I have a new job, and it was really great to realize how off my work life. Balance was I was working all the time and being fired kinda force me to reevaluate. That anyway, my for the list would be to schedule things during your week. I think it's really easy to be at home on the couch and your pajamas job searching, and it was helpful for me to force myself out go for a hike, meet up with friends who may be working with them for lunch or coffee or something just to force yourself to get out of the house. That's really helpful in there listener is going to be okay. And it's so hard to see that now. But it really is. Anyway, thank you so much left podcast. Tonight's. That's such good advice. Very good advice. And I do think it is really tricky. When so much of our identity is tied us in her ch- could be anything for me for many years. It was my job. There was a really great article in the New York Times in the last couple of days. A by the time areas it will be like a week old. Just talking about how millennials in particular are just so wrapped up in their jobs. I've read this article and are being encouraged through different various different outlive him. I don't know what the word is. I'm looking for organizations. Yes. You're the world to really identify as the work that they do. Yes. And that, you know, working hard is seen as such virtue and working eighty hours a week is it's just it's all right? Lex yourself. Word yourself worth not. That your self worth is tied up in your job. And kind of coupled with the conversation we had recently with an Helen Peterson about burn out. I think this is a really real thing, and it's really hard to strike that work life balance, especially when you're working at a place where this over work is encouraged and enabled. I I really when I left my job at VH one. That was such a big part of who. I was that. I went through a long period of like who what am I now? Yeah, I was identified so strongly through what I was doing. And I loved what I was doing that. It felt like a deep loss, even though it was my choice to transition out of that. It was still very weird and took me a while to kind of be okay with the fact that that wasn't a part of my identity anymore. Like, I didn't feel like I had anything to offer. Yeah. Oh, totally totally. It's hard. It's very hard. And I do think I loved the advice that that caller gave about scheduling. Yes. Hood it in the cow put it in the cow just put hike in the countless, even if it's take a walk or just setting up times to see people, especially if you were working in an environment where you had a lot of human interaction that can be really hard to to have it anymore. Anyway. Thank you. We love advice. We to join if Neil here, we sure do that as a person who recently went to Paris. That would be you. I feel like you might have something to offer shall we? Give it a read. Sure, I am forty two haven't been to Paris in sixteen years in that time. I have had three kids. My twin daughters have been begging to go to Paris since they started kindergarten. We made them save their allowance and plan how much a trip would cost in seven years later. They finally. Have enough for their portion of the trip. So he pulled the trigger and are going with my inlaws total of ten of us. This listener clarifies that they're not actually making their kids pay for the trip. It was just an exercise to teach them about saving. But I say make your kids pay for that trip. Anyway, on that note listener, they continue I know it won't be a relaxing trip, and it won't be like travel before kids. So my expectations are low for what I will actually get to do. But if I can buy some skin care products that are only available. There are available with better ingredients there or are cheaper to buy their than they would be in the US. I will be so happy, which did I get is P fifty a French product are there drugstore items? I should look for. This was also asks for a low key. But fun place to get a facial, which listener, I don't know the answer to that. But I'm including here in case, somebody in Paris is listening and wants to help you out or I would suggest checking our Facebook group or asking or Facebook groups, we do have we do have somebody there who might be able to help you as well. So I don't have a fun, but Lok? He place to get a facial recommendation. I finally got our audience might be able to weigh out. There have been a million threads about Paris. Both in the main Facebook group, and in the travel Facebook group, so go there that is where I would suggest starting. But p fifty is a French product is made by Bill logic ratio Raisch whose headquarters is in Paris. And they visited did visit I paid paid a visit to the skin-care mecca that is Bela g grey shares and they have facials there. Ooh. With Bela decreased reshare products, you do have to make an appointment in advance. If you don't want to do the whole facial. They also have like a skin analysis that they'll do I did not make an appointment, and I was not able to do this. But I just got some product recommendations while I was there. So I would do that. Even if you don't end up doing any treatments there. It's fun to just visit take themselves. Very seriously thorough wearing lab coats. You know, it's it's they'll speak French, and they all speak French surprise. It's crazy, but the other place that like everyone goes to is city pharma, which is this big pharmacy in Paris where they sell all kinds of delightful, French drugstore products, and French drugstore products are like not American drugs for products. Like, I think they're generally a little bit of a step above look if you've ever been to say Bigalow in New York City like a like a fancy drugstore. That's more the vibe in the in these Parisian drugstores. So I would I would check out city pharma. Kate. I know you have been a longtime. Devante of the Knicks. Knicks our favorite thing. Dishes when we say things on our wonderful French accents about a few years ago. Dory. I went what I started to kind of get more curious about skincare, basically, just started googling how to be a French person. And then imitating what I thought a French person would be and I bought a ton of French drugstore products. I mean as one show so the nut anew X e were of course, I can only speak for myself. But I'm confident saying everything wrong. I love that body oil. It's a dry oil. It's smells fantastic. It comes in a little bottle. It's not something you use a ton of I find just because I'm trying to save the oils much as I can. Yeah. Another thing I love which you can get stateside is the bio Dermot missile our water. I now I'm able to just by that here. But you know, what if you want to buy it in France, go for it? Another thing that I bought when I was going through this phase is something I found like a goop list of French pharmacy. Buys because of course. And I bought something called homeo- plas- mean, which is like a dry skin balm that I think in something I had read it was on a few of these like French pharma lists. It was something that it fashion shows makeup artists put on models lips. And as a person who loves in a lot of fashion show. As a model myself. I really I could relate. No, this is more as a person with dry lips. Oh, yeah. Okay. Also that so I bought that. And really liked it chlorine, dry shampoo. Yes. That's a fav-. That's a fav-. It's a powder, which I didn't realize the first time I bought it. But that's a classic French faith. But I I would say listener after reading your Email might my gut reaction was to be like go with whatever moves you. Yeah. I do have one other specific recommendation, though, what is it to buy cow delete products? There are they more they're cheaper love it. And they have a lot of they've lot of boutiques. I think I went to one in the Marais, and they just had so many products, and it it was cheap much cheaper during Cal arrondissements. Isn't it in? I believe the cut Liam did you take French with high school? We we was. Shoop Lou show Blee beaucoup different. I'm trying to say. Yep. Three remembers better than I do. But I. Well, this is turning into showing off. But yeah, just by like that sounds fun to stick to browse. And. Yeah. Things up the other place. I would say you must go even if you don't buy anything. There is the bone marshek. What's that? It's a department store that is so lovely and fancy and they have like they have a whole department of like paper products like markers and pencils and beautiful clothes if a beauty floor, and then they also have a food hall. That's amazing. So you must go there. I believe that is in the seventh. Can you say that in French Setia idiom right around e small are only small with? Well, listen when we take this show on the road. We will be sure to go to Paris and do the whole show in French. Doriot? Let's take a quick let's do that. Right back. Today's episode is brought to you by fabrics, as you know. It's me Kate Spencer the person on a mission to get jacked. And I've been super pumped that we have partnered with lettuce a fashion focused active where brand founded by Kate Hudson that makes cool high quality act of we're accessible to everyone because of its amazing price point if lettuce carries gym where suitable for any type of workout FedEx is your one stop shop for affordable, Jim wear and all of their designs are created in house. So you seriously cannot find these pieces anywhere else. Now before I forget fabrics is offering our listeners an incredible deal. You don't want to miss get to leggings only twenty four dollars a ninety nine dollars value when you sign up for a VIP membership. Just go to fabrics dot com slash forever. Thirty five to take advantage of this deal. 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I Kate as our listeners know, we do love all things self care. Whether it's improving your skin carotene or trying new ways to distress. We're all about it. And while I love a good listed, sometimes an old fashioned book is the way to go. The only problem is sometimes nonfiction books can be a little bit long winded. You know what I'm saying? I mean, I have experienced. It can be tough to retain those key points. So for time times like these I use blankets blankets is the only app that takes the best key takeaways and the need to know information from thousands of nonfiction books and condenses them down into just fifteen minutes. You can easily read or listen to blink dismayed for busy people who want to get the main points of books quickly without reading the entire book. And with their audio feature blankets makes it easy to finish four books a day while you're on the go Dory. If I listened to four bucks a day with blankets that's one thousand four hundred sixty books a year. 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We sure did that made me chuckle. Would you like to read it? I do I wondered if you could shed some light on your laundry garment care routines. I fluctuate between carefully hanging or laying flat to dry versus shoving everything in the dryer. And hoping nothing shrinks too much would love to hear how you each tackle laundry and caring for your clothing, and I chuckled because I am the person shows everything in the dryer and hopes it doesn't shrink and then it shrinks, I don't wash. I don't put my underwear in a bag and wash it that way. I don't I don't do anything. I am the worst here. Not the worst the worst. But I don't have like any sort of laundry care habits. Okay. In fact, I've just recently have started kind of remembering to read the tags before I wash because I a few years ago. I bought all these made well tank tops. And I made the mistake of assuming they were just like, I don't know cotton. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. That I washed them all and they were like viscous. Oh, yes. And they shrank and they strength to like crap tops. Yeah. Which isn't my look I mean, it could be maybe in two thousand nineteen made four dig those backout. So do you have good laundry habits have sort of basic laundry habits? I don't separate me neither lights and darks. No way. I just wash everything on cold water wash or the delicate cycle. So that's one thing. I do. I do some handwashing of stuff that I know is delicate is truly delicate or, you know, hand wash only and what would be two questions. What's an example of something that's truly delicate? And when you ha I don't even really know how to hand wash. Do you fill the sink fill the sink? I put an capful of Woolite. Okay. I do have some of that you let it you. You really have to let it soak for few minutes, and then you kind of rinse it out. And then you kind of. The best way to describe it. Like, you don't you don't like ring, you don't ring it out, you kind of like just. Removed smooth all the water out not all the water out. But you try to get some excess water out, and then I just hang it up or lay it flat, depending on the instructions is laying flat. A thing that you're supposed to be doing. Sometimes sometimes on the instructions, it'll say lifelock out to dry, the only thing that I have adopted that I do really enjoy is that I bought a drying rack, and I dry clothes outside. Yeah. That's nice because we do live in a wonderful climate for and I have friends who have a clue who have closed lines. And they just they don't even use dryer yet that was that's been something. But like I wanna start doing that. I just haven't done. So I will take things out that are not supposed to be put in the dryer. Like if stuff is able to be washed in the washing machine, but it's not supposed to be put in the dryer. I'll take it out and hang it up, Oregon if it says leaflet to dry will lay it flat I do wash my bras in a laundry bag in the washing machine. And I hang them up to dry don't should ten. Don't put them in the dryer. I don't even wash my bras ever. I not really. Okay. I wish my underwear. All right. I don't think I've ever really watched my bras. Okay. Okay. I've got a lot of work in this department. So you've and I mean, they might just you if I googled lingerie bag with the right stuff. Come up. Yeah. Okay. So. Yeah. Now, I'm also washing. My reusable bamboo cotton rounds. But I think the most kind of I don't know I should be. I should be air dry. My clothes. That's number one. But another thing that I do to try to reduce my washing. Clothes footprint is just not watch things that often. So I will put out put underwear in the laundry basket because like I'm not really wearing underwear kind of gross. But like all we're a t shirt a few times before I wash it totally. I'll just I'll give it a good sniff. And if those pits sniff those pits, and if it smells, okay, like it's going back in the drawer. I think that's our biggest piece of advice here with how we tackle on this. We sniff the pit also like that that makes your clothes last longer. Not washing them. Yes, I have gotten less. My kids will wear something for like two hours. And then try to put it in the laundry, like do know you're going to wear that for a week. Yeah. I mean, even workout clothes unless they're really, stinky. They're just wet not smelly interest. I won't wash them. I'll just leave them out to dry. Oh, okay. Yeah. Great. So, and you know, I'm more sensitive to smells now that I'm pregnant so a so you're what you're saying is you're sniffing is really on point. That's what I'm saying. I'm saying, I don't think it smells. It doesn't smell right, right? I'm gonna have you come into my bedroom. Nip out the laundry on my floor. I mean, even sucks I will ris wear I do too. I also sniff those you'd be too I sniff them to feel the smells like feet. I don't wanna wear these again, though. But sometimes I just wore these like in the house with my slippers on like easily to be wash. Are you like wet out for an hour? And then you came home you don't need to wash those. Save them safe them. It doesn't matter. Well, glad we solved that. I am to you. And I are just in our homes sniffing glue for we like actually do smell like me. Because we can't tell because we're into the smell exactly I will say since I have stopped using any per sprint the pit sniff. It's a little it's different type. Yeah. Yeah. But you know, that's okay with that. It's just life. It is just life. Well, we do have a voice mail that I would like to play. Okay. Great. I key in Dari and forever thirty five. My name is Allie. And I'm from Saint Paul Minnesota with negative nine degrees outside so and thinking of ways to stay inside. And I just turned twenty five and I thought maybe I would call you guys an ask what you were doing when you turn twenty five. Okay. Loves the podcast by. Happy birthday birthday staying warm up there. I hope you're eating soup. I thought you were going to name check like a Minnesotan. No, I've never even been to Minnesota. I went for just a weekend. And it was lovely. And they noted I do get very on brand for the state. It was April my flight got canceled. But I did eat a juicy Lucy, which is a hamburger with cheese inside the meat. Oh, that's brilliant. It was so good. That's so smart. Yeah. Well, why don't we have that here? Because we now get on the smartest people in say. Apparently, what were you doing at twenty five when I was twenty five I was in grad school, no z are no in Philadelphia. I was I was he's righty. You've got to degrees. Is that? Right. I do. I'm a masters in history and a master's in journalism. Why not why not a lot of useless degree a master's in history. Yeah. I was in a PHD program. Holy that I left early because I was like what am I doing? I don't I don't wanna PHD's. But when I turned twenty five I was still in the program. I didn't leave till the following year. And were you in a relationship at twenty five? I was I believe at that time. I was dating. A guy who was. A few years older than one of the few older gentlemen that I've ever dated. He was five years older. He was divorced. And he was a union organizer. Oh boy. Yeah. Something very sexy about is gonna say that sounds sexy. Yeah. A divorced thirty year old union organiz. Yeah. During has a really wistful. Look, I think he's divorced again. I'm just say anybody who lives near him get. No. He was really he was he was great. We just we kind of just like drifted apart in. He was traveling. And remember who's traveling a lot for work because he was organizing grad students. And he was spending the week like at another school far away until we didn't see each other that much and it just got it just got hard. And so we eventually ended up breaking up. But I think when I turn twenty five wait. I'm lying. I was not dating him. When I turned twenty five I dated him later that year when I was twenty cows. I feel like we're talking about the whole year of twenty five. Okay. Yeah. I did. I dated him later in the year at that time. I might have still been dating the optician the for the ex Mormon optician, I dated a former Mormon. Oh, you did you we've never talked about this. So we'll have to talk about this awful mind with not an optician. Who is a rocker? Oh, also, he didn't really date. Oh, loosely loose, Leslie said the term date. Anyway, another story, I think I was hating grad school. But I feel like I was having a lot of fun. It was very fun to be in Philly like my mid twenties because the city was really cheap. There are a lot of young people around. I went out all the time. Good time. That sounds like a fun life. Yeah. It was a fun life. But I was also like, wait. What am I doing again? You know, it's kind of in the back of my head like I mean this grad program that I don't like or see a point to. But now, I'm in it, do I just finish it. And then I was like no like a year later. No, what were you doing Kate? Twenty five I was living in New York City. I was performing improv comedy very regularly at the upright citizens brigade theatre. I was dating. My now husband think we were living together actually where were you living in Chelsea in a studio apartment? That had truly the smallest bathroom you've ever been had like a quarter tub. Oh, God the work. Cockroaches would come out. My cat would sit there and wait for the tiniest. It was really an one time. I overflow that toilets and then left my apart. I didn't know I left my apartment and it poured water onto all the way to the first floor. No, no. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, dear. Those were the times those were the, but I was also going through a lot of weird stuff which was like, I was working actually think I was being sexually harassed at my job. When I was twenty five Marie working. I was working for a company that I had kind of intended to be a day job. But it actually was filled with really wonderful people, and it was was fulfilling in a lot of ways. And then at some point a co worker started sexually harassing me. And that was really confusing. And didn't know how to deal with it. And I didn't I didn't really it was a small company, and I had felt too scared to go to our if that makes sense. So I quit and took an internship. Oh, and then was a temp. So I would temp at like the most doing the most bonkers thing. Yeah. Like fi I mean, the driest host shit. And this was like I didn't have an iphone till like secretly look like, you know, I was on craziest temp job. I just have this. I did a lot of temping as a receptionist at McKinsey McCann, Lincoln's McKinsey, which is like a brother work, there tense consulting firm. I mean, like I once handed out metro cards in front of port authority as some sort of rand gig. I've had a lot of weird jobs. Can I tell you about my youngest temp job was in Boston? It's like one of the summers of when I was in college. I temped for WG be h ooh and love WG eight and they had a division. I don't think it still exists, but they had a division at the time. I might have talked about this before were they provided close captioning for different shows who should clarify WG beaches, the PBS. Yes station of station affiliate whatever raider Boston in Boston. So they would like like TLC would send them a show to like close caption, for example. So they had me go. They had me captioning episodes of dragnet that sounds like kind of a fun town was just watch dragnet and close. He was also I worked the Fordham midnight Shitsu shit. So was like it was just it was it was just like this bizarre felt like a different sort of like an alternate universe. Yeah. Like, I just would show up at four PM put on headphones and watch dragnet. Translation, that's a weird job. It was fun. But also weird also weird like when every time I tempt because you're like a stranger going into family. Yeah. And everybody has routines. And then you're just kind of this random person who's there for the day. And you don't know why they need a temp or like, you know, it's just like always very weird mysterious, but I did start an internship at like twenty five I think, and I felt very weird about it. Because all the people I was working with and working for. We're like also my age intern. When I was twenty eight really, yes. Well, it's now I'm like that sounds so of course, be an internet whatever age you want. But at the time I felt this weird casher to like Martin. Figured out. Yes, I did feel behind, but I'm really grateful for that upper -tunities because it was I was writing and I got to and then then kind of kicked off my professional writing career. Did you know that you wanted to be a writer at the time? I remember I had always thought about being a writer, and I had applied to grad school in the nut gone. And yes, I knew that the my day job that I was doing was not what I wanted to be doing. And what was the what was the general area of your day job production of marketing and production? And then when the co worker started harassing me. I was like honestly was like it motivated me to leave even though I I wish I had handled that situation differently. But that's just a that's an offline story. But anyway, that did I left because of that. But honestly, you know, it it did work out 'cause I found an internship and found all these weird temp jobs. That's what I was doing at twenty five. So wherever you are twenty five is great. Yeah. Thirty five forty five fifty five be an intern at any age, totally might even get to, you know, make a movie out of it. Starring Robert deniro. So there you go. Well, daury. Yes. Now that we've relived those memories, I think we can wrap it up. I think so too. Thank you. Everybody for listening talk to you next week. I.

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