Zach Bush, MD Wants You To Let Go Of Your Story
<MUSIC> cubicle you've really living is your story. You're going to go back into an environment at home where everybody thinks they know who you are because you have very carefully created a cubicle you show everybody you are a multifaceted spiritual creature that has innumerable facets and phases to you. There's such beauty and complexity in you and yet you choose to show force faces of a cubicle and you have created that story of your life and who you are through training and I would say it's big problem that all of us face in this room is the story that you tell yourself of what your life has been keeping you in a box. That's the Great Zach Bush back for round number three and this is the ritual podcast in which role podcast. How are you guys doing what's happening? My name is rich role. I am your podcast host. This is my show. Welcome or welcome back. Quick Reminder. I'm doing I live show live podcast extravaganza with special guests to be announced. It's all going down Friday. September twenty seventh mark your calendar at the historic the gorgeous eleven seven hundred seat Wilshire Ebell theater right here in Los Angeles super super excited about how this shaping up cannot wait for this evening for more information and tickets are going fast. Click the appearances tab on my website ritual dot com and grab them while they're hot second. <hes> I implore anyone listening who is struggling with their diet to check out our plan power meal planner super affordably priced at just a dollar ninety a week the price of of a cup of coffee you get access to thousands essentially an unlimited supply of nutritious and delicious plant based recipes grocery lists grocery delivery and access to a team of experienced dietary coaches seven days a week to learn more in sign up visit meals ritual dot com okay. He's back people today the man himself one of the most fascinating the most popular guests by a long shot to grace's platform warm sack Bush M._d.. Returns around three of the podcast and I gotta say this one. <hes> is a mind blower for those newer to the show Zach is many things he is the founder and director of 'em Clinic Integrative Health Center in Virginia and I know he hates when people say this but it is true he is one of the few triple board certified physicians in America with expertise in internal medicine and chronology and metabolism herbalism and hospice palliative care <hes> in addition to his work and Functional Medicine Longevity Autism Gut health cancer the list goes on and on he is an avid environmentalist and activist involved in a multitude the two projects that focus on everything from ecology <hes> soil health regenerative agriculture farmer wellbeing <hes> and spirituality <hes> along those lines. I implore all of you to check out his this documentary series. It's called farmers footprints and it takes a look at the impact of glyphosate on human and environmental health which is something we talked about in our previous episodes and it's done through the lens of farmers and and their communities <hes> you can view that on Zack's website Zach Bush M._d.. Dot Com or at farmers footprint dot U._S. and I'll put links to those sites in the show notes. I set up a four but I think it's worth repeating <hes> in my opinion. Zach is a master healer. He's a master consciousness gift to humanity and somebody I'm very proud to call friend <hes> after Zack's previous appearances on the show episodes three fifty three which was back in March of two thousand eighteen and episode four fourteen from January of this year two of the most impactful and moving conversations of my life <hes> we invited Zach and his wife Jen Peril Bush to join us on on our recent retreat in Italy so today's conversation which I think he'll find goes in directions quite different from our previous conversations is a product of that experience and it's all coming up after these messages of support from the sponsors does that make this show possible the first of which is from my friends at prints on wood. It's summer which means weddings birthdays anniversaries what else family reunions all that kind of stuff right and it's really hard to find a cool will unique memorable and meaningful gift which is why Prince on wood is so freaking cool because a beautiful photo printed directly onto a gorgeous piece of wood. That's a pretty Dang hard thing to beat several months ago out of the blue. I might add these guys it prints on would send Julian I some photos of our family and we absolutely love now. The prince are a total work of art. 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They were physically present for the conversation that you're about to hear so the next time you're looking for a unique super cool meaningful and environmentally sustainable gift that gives back. I mean what else checks all those boxes checkout prints on would right now. My listeners can receive an incredible thirty percent off the first order order from prints on wood when you go to prince on would dot com and enter the code rich role at checkout. That's prints on would dot com code ritual at checkout to get thirty percent off your first order today's episode there's also brought to you by design crowd while we're on the topic of beautiful visual designs. How old is Your Business Logo? Does your website need graphic makeover. 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DOT COM forward slash ritual or simply enter the discount code ritual when posting project on design crowd and finally were brought to you by hi squarespace the simplest way for anyone to build a beautiful landing page website or online store now that you've dialed in that logo it's time to craft a website that looks just as good as the work that you create so whether you're you're a business owner needing a new compelling website and artists wanting to show off your portfolio squarespace. has you covered with huge catalog of industry specific designer templates you can rely on along with shiny features that make it easy and and dare I say fun to customize a page with squarespace. You can design a stunning website in a matter of hours. They're straightforward interfaces clean. It's easy to navigate and super simple setup and the best part is that anyone can use squarespace space to create a professional website from scratch regardless of skill level. 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So on previous episodes we explored everything from the impact of glyphosate on degenerative disease to the importance of regenerative agriculture to what can be done to heal ourselves and had the planet we share <hes> expanding upon those conversations today we go in a few new in different directions we talk about our relationship with pain both physical and psychic <hes> talk about our unhealthy obsession with the pursuit of comfort the stories we craft that form our identity and more often than not hold us hostage and many other subjects including some shared experiences is from a group Holy Tropic breathing experience that Julie had taken the group through <hes> prior to the session which I think he's going to find fascinating <hes> like the recent jemma Newman episode. This was recorded live from our event in Italy thus audio only we know Youtube version of this and closes with Zach leading this amazing meditation <hes> and I should say that we edited out or truncated some of the long pregnant pauses or extended moments of silence during that meditation simply for the sake of you guys the listeners as a final note I wanted to add that are retrievers. The people that attended our Italy experience on their own accord have collectively raised raised and donated eighty one thousand dollars for Zack's farmers footprint organization and Docu series which is just incredible so immense gratitude. Thank you to all who attended and contributed if Zack's message wjr moves you to get involved you can learn more and donate yourself at farmers footprint dot U._S.. Okay this is a deep one <hes> again. Perhaps a little bit different from that which you've come to expect from doctors ac back but I think something tells me you're going to dig it. I certainly did so. Let's get into it. This is me and Dr Sack Bush. I've fallen in love with value this week. He's been awesome so beautiful every single one either that I've had time to sit and talk with his blow my mind you just beautiful talented extraordinary human beings that all walked walked into this week Rada fucking change everything and that's unusual and amazed by that. I'm just amazed I was just telling rich as we were sitting here beforehand of like I've talked to people all over the world and all this but it's unusual to come into environment where four forty plus people are here to change everything that it takes to be a better. You and it's really an honor to be here and I just have extraordinary gratitude to Julian rich for including Jenin I in this week. It's a powerful opportunity for us to be human <hes> to show who we are and be vulnerable as well as <hes> learned from the depth. That's in this room. The things that you guys experienced during in your breathing breathing is humbling to be witnessed that not enough humans get to see other humans become buffalo. That's freaking unique and <hes> it's beautiful and I pulled the whale card <hes> and that was an interesting journey just in reading that card and so <hes> these animals are one of my passions is as the animals animals on earth and the devastating effects we've had on them in the last. Few decades is almost unspeakable. <hes> and I'm just so grateful that we can embody that and become perhaps part of a higher consciousness where these animals are not only respected respected on earth but they become part of us. We become part of them and you guys have embodied that really well this some of you more than others well. I think we can all agree that we're very blessed to have you and Jen in our presence. It's it's been a gift to have you here and to kind of make today's Bush Day everybody how many of you here heard one of the two new podcast episodes that that together almost everybody it's it's it's a joke in our house the regularity with which I get feedback like just months and months after like I think yesterday Saturday somebody you know sent a message about it so it's crazy how much your message has connected with this audience and it's really cool man so I want to continue that conversation. What was interesting about what you just said about pulling the whale card? I don't know if you know this but like two days ago a giant whale I think it was a sperm whale washed on shore in Italy really in Italy Lilly and they discovered about eight pounds of plastic in its got and I think that kind of perfectly encaptures it's interesting that you pulled the wheel card you know with that because it speaks so much of what you're about wow that's overwhelming yeah. That's very pertinent to where we would like to talk about so when we when we last left off off the second path that we did kind of ended with his epic monologue that you blessed all of us with which really kind of pivoted on this theme of the cycles of life and rethinking what death means and how that impacts how we live our lives and I thought maybe you could expound a little bit on that since it was so impactful for so many people yeah and that's that monologue came from you really I mean I do want to point that out that much like the energy that you guys have accomplished this week what you guys have accomplished in yourself transformations as we give come out of the space that that rich and Julie have chosen to hold for all of us <hes> to be transformative in and that's why your podcast is become a worldwide best is because because you holding extrordinary spaces for people to to find things in themselves that they didn't know is ready to be spoken and so you gave me an avenue and by the time somebody says whether you for ninety minutes they don't know how they got to where they're at. That's for sure and so that was a real tribute to what you do really <hes> more than myself but that that moment I think is worth as a wonderful starting point is the monologue was based on my experience in the I._C._U.. Of watching patients die and that'd be resuscitated and give report as to what they just experienced and it came around to the single line which was that <hes> what they experienced the very first thing they said in their experience wasn't about I saw the white light or saw Jesus or this or that they all said I felt completely accepted for the first time in my life and in all of the sessions that I've been in individually with many of you this week this becomes a theme for each of us is we don't feel seen we feel no matter how much we do or produce we feel unseen and therefore unrecognized and therefore unaccepted and we go through all kinds of ridiculous social machinations to try to reconnect and get some sort of affirmation from each other that we are seeing or respected or loved. Moved and it's a theory and it's a chasing after the wind because ultimately the human mind is no more capable of seeing you each for who you are than it is figuring anything out you know the human mind is a very weak week agent of conception and very weak agent of analysis because it works in such a black and white physical plane when in fact you know much of I think many people that you work with on in your podcast rich are coming to that podcast out of having reached flow state somehow and so our athletes are phenomenal demonstrating. What flow state looks like and that's what you I'm sure got into in your <hes> chasing ultra there as you're you moved from state of disconnect I suspect in at forty nine or whenever it was that you are in that moment of crisis in that transformation? I guess I'd turn back on you for a moment and just ask what if in the Lens of 'em I seen where were you had when as a lawyer and in that and not necessarily just seen by the world but seen by yourself what aspects of yourself could you see clearly at that point in your life and what was hidden yeah. That's a great question. I mean certainly I didn't feel that I I was being seen. I was unable to truly see myself other than glimpses of the possibility of what I knew I could be. I guess but without giving myself permission to inhabit that you know so I felt strongly that I was living the wrong life. I didn't have clarity on what the correct life for me would be and I definitely had a powerful powerful sense of of not only being not seen but not being able to see myself and I had to create painful moments for myself in order to compel me to confront certain things about how I I was living in order to force me to work through it in hindsight. Do you think there was parts of you could see clearly that could see clearly you could see clearly of yourself. was there parts of your characters but I think it was clouded by fear you know Oh interesting which made it murky. It was too scary to really look at that <hes> but you know Julia was incredibly helpful as a support system in helping me you know have the courage the fortitude to be able to not only began to expand that aperture but do the work required to walk towards it. I think that is one of the most profound statements that we can all here's than even the the parts of us that we can see clearly are clouded by fear which is so true. I think we are so afraid of ourselves which is so bizarre that we've been set in fear of ourselves and you know brings. I can't remember who the the famous quotes were that have been around this subject but you know you hear the the theme of the thing that you should fear the most is your own power because this you're not connecting to it and that's the fearful part is what are you doing disconnected from your power and do you have a sense where that fear was coming from. What was the origin of fear and on that or was it too vague to even point yeah? That's a great question. I don't know that I can identify the locus of that other than to say that perhaps it had something to do with with the power being located in a place that was so far askance of my sense of what was socially acceptable for somebody who had had my experience is that the fear had to do with stepping outside of what I knew even as dysfunctional as it was to try something completely outside of my comfort zone experience that's spot what on and I think we can all relate to that in different ways and that it's we would rather stay uncomfortable knowing this then jump into the unknown yeah. There's a there's a sort of a common refrain in recovery circles which goes something along the lines of when the pain of your current situation exceeds the fear of the unknown. That's when you change right so that's that thing where where you know the pain that you create for yourself off can actually be the catalyst for the change that you seek not that pain is necessary for that transformation but it can be a useful mechanism for it and so it's not always to be avoided but rather to be understood Eh and leveraged and I think the pain is perhaps necessary on some level for change and transformation and this is what I get terrified as a physician of and I saw it in spades in the hostas world which is our dependence resonance overuse of Art Narcotics and so the opioid stuff and everything else that we're we're on this opium. Explosion is doling pain. Yeah it's a barrier confronting the pain that can be that transformative transformative vehicle and what if we did that at the end of life to everybody so you couldn't make your ultimate transformation and that terrifies me about our current hospice movement which is based on pain control what what a ludicrous goal ultimately for us a species to doll the the extra wizardly developed sensory processing that would suggest pain and it's interesting that we can have a sensory three experience of pain from emotional stress yeah it doesn't have to be biologic whatsoever and the Chinese in their four thousand years of wisdom in the medicine. There have done a very good job of showing us where her pain shows up biologically is always has a a an emotional spiritual underpinning so to play devil's advocate a little bit as compassionate beings. We don't want to see the people that we love suffering and if somebody is in that place nearing the end of their life. What is the appropriate compassionate response that doesn't involve overly medicating? It's beautiful. That's a great question obviously Diane critical. The answer is touch and human touches has an extremely powerful way to reduce pain and in the same rate at which we've started to overuse overuse narcotics and and and the whole addiction you know process here we've stopped touching our patients and we've stopped touching our loved ones who are dying somewhat out of just just an untrained of what that looks like <hes> from family members <hes> Cormac McCarthy's one of my favorite authors out there in a modern writers out there and he's so brutal with his simple descriptions of a scene gene and he loves the topic because of brutal death and pain and horrific scenes that he paints his most benign book gotten got the most accolades which was the all the pretty horses but blood Meridian is worth a raid incredible book that one just like his brutal in its depiction of human violence and what you see depicted off in the beginning of <hes> all the pretty horses is the stark scene of somebody just died and they're they're cough. It is in the home for days and <hes> thousand normal back back then you know that you know just even at the beginning of the nineteen nineteen hundreds it was death happened in the home and the family was intimately involved with that there was a process of picking up the body and wrapping it up and you know it wasn't a sterile darrelle process. There was nobody that came swooping in to rush that off to the corner and you know all of this and so there was an experience with death and not just on the human plane which you also see in Cormac McCarthy's work is the brutal and death that was happening around them on the farm horses dying animals you know falling into traumatic and points and and death on all kinds of levels we were intimately involved with that for all of history and perhaps most of all in war and one of the things that terrifies me right now is that we have as Americans been immersed in war in a long time and that's it. Let's pause on that for a minute because that's a that's a gnarly only thing to say right. I think it is I think I'm afraid that that history repeats itself when we don't pay attention to history and I'm not the only person afraid of that obviously it's been said by a lot smarter people than me but and if we look at World War Two as an obvious out spring of World War One which was an obvious out springing of some of the wars that were happening in Europe at the end of the eighteen hundreds we start to see that there was again a familiarity with brutal brutal violence with war on their soils <hes> as Americans we just can't even Fathom World War One we lost sixty thousand soldiers in world in Vietnam over twenty five year period and so if you imagine that and then keep in mind that that had to be done at nearly face to face levels <unk> of combat where men were with intendo thirty yards and cutting each other up with machine gunfire razor wire explosives Ra- literally body parts raining down on each other and being covered in each other's blood and feces and living in each other's feces and the trench warfare that went on for years in the same trenches <hes> you all have not experienced sd pain you haven't experienced suffering you haven't experienced extremity of what the human mind set in body is capable of receiving and witnessing and perpetrating yeah to say one thing about what you just said there are interesting parallels between warfare and this relationship with that we have in the sense that what was once tactile and personal in the Cormac McCarthy sense <hes> has become whitewashed and sanitized so were fair is no longer you know hand to hand combat in the trash like World War One. It's you know it's a shot from a drone or it's cyber warfare from three thousand miles away that moves economies and impacts lives a little bit more indirectly and death has been removed from our visual and emotional field <hes> <hes> and put behind closed walls because we're so afraid to look at it because it would force us to look at ourselves. So what are we take from this shift in how we manage these two things in terms of how to inform how to live our lives better. That's thank you for really and I'm going to take it back to that just for seconds so we can loop that back so I want. I want you to realize that those men after two million people dead were still marching into that warfare knowing exactly what they were that they were GonNa die and they wrote some of the most heart-rending stories are letters back to their loved ones in preparation for their death and yet at no point was there fear in there and so how is it that one hundred years later we're sitting here and what we're afraid feet of his ourselves. We're afraid as two men sitting on a couch together the our highest fear is that we don't know ourselves and that we don't know why why we're here and that we might not be doing enough and that we don't really know how to connect to the people that we love and where where did we how do we get there. You know to the point where we we we lost the fear of death historically we could we can divorce from that and then we lose the experience of real pain through this pursuit of comfort lifestyle ultimately which has been this you know hundreds of year march towards that but obviously in the last fifty years there's never been a faster march towards such a massive portion of humanity living in comfort you know only to experience higher pain and it's interesting that are chronic pain rates accelerate as our lifestyles appeared to get more comfortable yeah. That's the great irony right that that that comfort and luxury is actually creating the pain that we need to medicate ourselves against and so that's where I think we have to reevaluate our concept of pain is pain actually a bad thing. Is it something that we need to avoid and I would argue that not at all because an endocrine system so as an endocrinologist were it's my favorite field of medicine in this went into it in the sense that everything the thing is a feedback loop and so if you have if you eat sugar your insulin goes up if you're when you're insulin goes up coast goes into the cell when your blood sugar drops insulin goes back down and so there's a feedback loop that achieves achieves all of that. There's this constant communication so parathyroid hormone goes up to release calcium from the bone and then it drops down to get calcium back into the bone and so you have this constant regenerative cycling of tissue of genes proteins of all the mechanics of cellular health are always in transition. They're always in this given exchange is pushing poll give and take kind of communication and our whole neurologic systems are loaded with pain receptors and we have this very natural mechanism that releases opioids from our own cells and we call him endorphins and we call him a lot of different. It'll molecular terms but these little molecules all have relationship to morphine. The Structure Morphine is very similar to endorphin itself and those endorphins that you achieve when you're running are hitting all of those pain receptors and so it's very likely that you wake up with more back pay then and you will have an hour into running and so you'll hit that threshold where the first half hours misery when you're trying to get moving and then suddenly you hit that threshold where pain just goes away. I'd be curious to when you were running all those those ultramarathons in Hawaii. What was that joining like? I mean you did it over and over again to yourself like there must have been so much pain that week but it's it's a different I mean there are different kinds of pain to you know <music> psychic pain emotional pain <hes> the physical pain and then within the physical is it acute or is it. You know there's so many ways to calibrate that and dissect it so I don't know I don't know like I don't know how to answer that other than to say a to to your first point yeah like I have some like back stuff now. I'm a little creaky at fifty two and I get out of bed in the morning. I'm like I'm not moving so fluidly but yeah half an hour into the run. That's like all the pain goes away. You know basically that's the best that I feel like you know all day when that's happening and I think you know one's relationship to pain is similar to ones relationship to time in that it's malleable and flexible depending being upon your experience right so your exposure to it allows you to acclimate to it and develop a new and different relationship to it that that in my experience allows you to kind of overcome the fear around it like once you embrace it rather than run away from it <hes> you realize that it can be this this crucible for for Growth and progress and by progress. I mean personal growth things of that nature. which would you rather have a bunch of different types of pain? Which would I rather have physical psychological pain well? I mean you know physical. Pain is is very like binary. I think there was some study I stumbled across some article about a study that said <hes> that you know the psychic and emotional pain that we have is you know is we underestimated. It's actually just as as impactful and profound as the physical pain but we don't think about those two things in the same way nor do we treat them in the same way so I would. I think you're exactly right and in in my personal experience but definitely my experience as a physician I see the psychic pain pain having far longer ramifications and more detrimental ramifications to function than physical pain. Physical pain is actually a neurologic experience where you have a neuron. That's sensing stimulus and it's sending a signal to your brain. That's GonNa that's GonNa send the experience of pain tear. Your sensory processing center whereas emotional pain is so vague you know psychic pain is so vague. It's trigger that your body can't prepare hair the same way you don't have the same warning systems you know have the same coping mechanisms and so it's this insidious thing that creeps in and suddenly you're in an incredible turn the other day I think it was the cruise crucible of suffering and we can find ourselves these moments of for you it was you know a couple of nights miss sleep and you find yourself in the crucible suffering and we've all missed those nights of sleep and we all have a sense that it's so interesting how vulnerable the. Human brain is right like we are all on the brink of insanity. You missed three nights asleep and you get a little alcohol on top of that and you have a little bit of you know emotional stressor that you don't understand where it came from and all that and pretty soon you're pretty much psychotic psychotic. That's the reassuring part of being just just no. You're not alone in that. That's I guess where I meet you there. We are so vulnerable and I see this. Most you know in my journey with my psych patients <hes> this woman that has been with me the longest now I've been her doctor for almost twenty years and <hes> she came to she was on thirty five medications and sixteen of those were essentially acting drugs for her brain. Yeah <hes> mood mood stabilisers anti-spasmodics you know she was on every frigging drug class that we have and usually to again and for most of those two or three from a single drug class and so she had so much redundancy and our drugs and she spent can't you know from age sixteen onto about you know when I met her she was about forty six so she spent thirty years in psych wards in and out of psych hospitals and lived more time inside more than she did outside of them and then was in you know a section eight housing and all this kind of disability and all that between that was two thousand T- that I picked her up I guess <hes> Game Two thousand two and by two thousand thousand twelve ten years later I had it down to medications and she hadn't been in the psych ward in two and a half years over the last eight years he's popped into psych wards twice but there's only because she was homeless and those moments and she knew she could work the system to to get get a bed and under her and so she basically faked neurosis and got herself in psych wards twice since then and <hes> she's not psychotic. She's not a psychotic person <hes> but on those psych wards <hes> she she was a terror which is relatively short woman but you know quite overweight from all the drugs that she'd been on all of them were causing obesity <hes> shutting down our metabolism but she had been famous for blowing through armored doors she could she could run herself through armor doors and psych units <hes> and so she had this like preternatural strengthen her psychosis that she could. She was scary violent. <hes> she's one of the most gentle people I know and she's one of the most intuitive people people and I call her my oracle now 'cause she'll call me up. You know it'd be like Dr Porsche something about to happen next week. That's going to be really interesting and great in this way and sure enough next week. Something happens. She's very tied into the spiritual realm she can see things is that we can't see and so when she becomes vulnerable when she becomes weekend she looks florally psychotic in a different way than you and I would because she's closer to this veil that we can't really <hes> that is harder to approach for for for people with more biologic faculties in place perhaps and so I- pointer as an example of this this threshold of is pain good is paying bad because basically she was on thirty two drugs to Dole her experience words of depression and anxiety to just a fog and she was kept in a fog for thirty years and suffered despite all the fog and in the end she just wanted to be seen and so what I ended up you know being able to do as a human being was just really listened to her story over and over again and she had to tell it to me until I was so tired of hearing her story and it took me a long time to find out that her story ultimately was her biggest problem that and I would say it's the biggest problem that all of us face in this room is the story that you tell yourself of what your life has been. It's keeping you in a box so her story is obvious to look at it and we'll her box Fox was she's a psych patient and she's there once. I listened to her story enough times as to how she got herself there by sixteen into psychosis turns out in that situation it was her she her father runs a service station <hes> over over instant in the Stanton area in in the beautiful Shenandoah Valley of Virginia and <hes> by the time she was twelve years old he he was allowing his employees to to give him some money so that they could rape his daughter behind the service station and this happened for a decade of her life in Anada psych ward she'd come back and be raped again and her father was perpetrating this situation around around her and so you hear that story and you're like well that's horrific and that's you know what psyche could possibly handle that and the answer is she could have handled it because she does now. She handles that story without any drugs drugs because it got hurt and she was able to to process that enough times and realize that it wasn't her she was much bigger entity than that story for a moment in this biologic nick body she had been raped many times. Her father was somebody she could not trust but she's much bigger than that. She's a spiritual being and she got to this largely through her own. You know kind of Christian mindset faith and and you know some interesting people came into our life to kind of. I think you know infuse this. You know her knowledge of finding that bigger self but she now sees herself as this this energetic entity is this woman in the bigger sense of the word. She's a nurturing creative force on the planet that can is tied into all of the history of of God and spirituality and humanity and it's as as long as she can stay grounded. How did that then the the short traumas that happened in her life here? Don't don't hurt her. It doesn't cause pain yeah. I mean what that's an amazing story. I mean what I hear in that is just the tremendous resilience that that we all have and that were born capable and we have everything that we need to not only survive but you know whether whatever life throws at us <hes> but we're we've developed <hes> insulated culture in which we disempower people by treating them as if they're powerless or incapable of handling these certain things and it's delicate because you wanna give people the support that they need to deal with something as traumatic as that I mean I can't possibly imagine <hes> but to say to somebody like okay. This is this is like you need to be on all these pills or you need this and that is to tell somebody that they are not capable and it's distribute I'm of of their power right and so what is the long-term implication of that message that you're sending to people and to what extent is this epidemic of people desiring to be seen and not being seen being driven by loneliness and like what Johann on Hari would call loss connections like we're just despite you know the Internet connecting us all we've never been more separated from each other and more alone like we're not living like this. Week is bad on some level in experiment in in an alternative communal living and it feels good. I think everybody here would say like we all feel so connected to each other and there's a life force in a vitality that comes with that that we don't get to experience in our daily lives when we go back and we all immerse ourselves in our various various forms of cubicles in which we all live right so how can we restructure this to create to recapture those connections to see each other to allow ourselves to be seen and community to support each other so that we can feel empowered and be empowered and provide empowerment others so how can we solve all the problems that simply that super good. I I love those questions is he's like okay succinctly. Let's <hes> yeah in some ways. I think that the fastest way to get there has let go of your story. <hes> the reason why you guys have had such transformational events this week 'cause nobody here really knew your story and there wasn't time for us to all learn each other stories instead we chose to meet each other right where each of us without without any preconceived notions of who you are or what faculties or experiences or accomplishments I you've had and just say I'm human sweet. I am too like let's do this thing. Let's start breathing and see where this goes and suddenly people are turning another animals and and you feel vulnerable enough to share that and you express you know the horrific things that's happened in your life that would have you know led to being an animal and embodying that experience and so how can we do that. How can we create a society where we don't fall back in our cubicles? The cubicle you've you really living in is your story. You're going to go back into an environment at home where everybody thinks they know who you are because you have very carefully created a cubicle that you show everybody and the one you get frustrated when they can't see all four sides of your cubicle. You're like you don't even know me like you are a multi multifaceted spiritual creature that has innumerable facets and phases to you. There's such beauty and complexity in you and yet you choose to show force faces of a cubicle and you have created that story of your life and who you are through training we do this with Cs and you know the curriculum vitae in the resume and all this stuff like we build this long story of what we've done in our life. Isn't it ridiculous that I could look at it. A resume in suppose is that I know anything about this human being. That's applying for a job. Isn't it ridiculous that you would actually put something up on dating website that you would think would show some face of who you are. Isn't it ridiculous that your partner in life who knows you better than E. Mails can't see you because you won't let them that's weird. What are we doing? What we're doing is acting out of fear? Were afraid to let down those four walls because we're afraid there's nothing inside or perhaps we're afraid that that what would be discovered inside would is tantamount to being unlovable aw yes and if there was something inside we would have to be lovable right and so I think it's the sense of hollowness and so is it possible that you're unlovable and for me I had to face this very brutally on my you know well compared to World War One not at all brutally but again sometimes that psychic pain can be greater than than any physical threat <hes> had a great marriage. I thought I was married for eighteen years together. Twenty Years <hes> met this woman when I was pretty young and had to amazing kids and never never really had to fight in twenty years no conflict in the marriage <hes> but we we adversity that we dealt with as a couple was really around extended family so her whole family including ourselves for suffered from major depression over their lifetimes many many times and <hes> a couple of her siblings. Try to commit suicide. One of them protected many many times so we rehab are siblings in our home for years at a time and so those were the challenges that came him up in those and so from my rational brain is like I've got a great marriage. It's amazing like no conflict. We can support other people you know this and but there was this huge loneliness developing in both of our lives because we were showing each other we were building stories. We were building these complicated long stories of who were becoming and we could know each other less and less over time and I did that to myself if I created a story that was so complicated and it had to do with being a doctor of ultimately and she knew me before I was a doctor and watch me to that journey and a whole stupid thing that everybody always right introduces is me houses parts of my story which is triple certify here that so many times. I'm like if I ever hear drip abort survey again. I'm going to kill somebody just so sick of hearing that that sentence and I've asked my employees to stop sending out that bio just like say just Zack. He's kind of a confused guy. He's here to talk to. You just like sit out something. That's a little closer to mark. He's lost. He's just like wandering around you just ran into you couldn't find an end point so he's still wandering is something more realistic you know than than making it sound like a bunch of achievements and and so I built all these stories this long story and I was looking for self worth in pouring out service and being an ultimate service machine and I was pretty frigging good at it and at the cost of complete alienated from my wife and she didn't there's there's no way she could have known me by the end of that twenty journey and she had respect for many end she wasn't angry at me but she goes nothing to touch and that you know that was a number of years ago now obviously and <hes> the result in my life was largely that I couldn't touch anybody either and so I had become untouchable because of the complexity of my story and I couldn't touch anybody because of the complexity of my story I was so walled off in my cubicle of my story and you mentioned you know this identity of resilience in this woman like what resilient personality they must have survived that and I've come to see that that identity of resilience be the most destructive self-identity that somebody can have because if your self identity becomes I am resilient. And what do you need to prove your identity. You difficulty need pain suffering difficulty trauma so that you can be resilient again. You will keep creating trauma in your life. If your identity it's resilience you will never become successful if your identity is resilience because you would have to lose your self identity to find ease and success another one that I see all the time is the identity of fix it and I think that's where I fall into. I can fix anything and say the savior. I'm I can literally fix anything. If you have a flat tire no problem I worked for a tire company fixture tire. You refrigerators down no problem. I can fix your refrigerator car goes out no problem. I did a car mechanics for years. I can go fix alternator no problem. You need a house bill no problem. I getting a general contractor license build you a house. I am a freaking pathetic fixer like to the nth degree fixer and if your identity is a fixer. What do you need in your life everyday Korokin? You need a Lotta Shit broken and if there's nothing broken you'll probably fly off the handle and break something or you go into an existential crisis now. You're an identity crisis. I'm useless to the world fucking useless. I haven't done anything today. I haven't fixed a damn thing today and so this is how our story becomes an identity. That's usually can be boiled down to one word and each of you that I've met with this week. Have a one word identity that we can find pretty quickly and be like you really won't be that no. I hate that. I hate fucking fixing things every day in fact that's what I bitch at most of all my my wonderful wife so I have most everybody he wants to fix it. No you want to fix it. You don't put you're projecting yourself on. Other people like other people. Don't they just they just mentioned something and you suddenly make that into something. You need to go. Oh Fix. They were just reporting status that they weren't telling it wasn't to do they were they were activating. So how do we transcend these. One word identity construct that we create for ourselves. It's is the hardest thing we can do and and yet it is done. Instantaneously is a decision that can be had which says are you willing to let go of everything you think you are. Are you willing to actually become nothing for a moment. This is where where pain can be powerful because short of pain who's going to say yes to that exactly exactly and nowhere more desperately do need that at the end of life. Probably you know if we haven't found self yet. We need to find it in those last couple minutes of life so that we can have closure on this biologic journey that we did in this spotting and have a rising consciousness and I get increasingly excited about our clinic because we do know biology anymore and it frustrates the hell out of my people coming in clinic the first time a patient comes in with cancer and they know that I've got an outside box cancer and all this and they want me to fix their cancer and we will never talk about their cancer and they keep trying to bring them back to cancer and we talk about something else because the cancer is not the problem. The cancer is a symptom mm-hmm downstream of this disconnect ultimately from themselves and the psychic trauma. That's been held in their body from not being themselves has created massive disconnect at the physiology level and there's profound loneliness. Is happening down at the cellular level to achieve a cancer so I can't remember if we've talked about this before or not but but a cancer cell is has been sliced off from all communication and once it loses communication from the greater greater organism it it hasn't lost one thing which is a dry for life and so it's very fascinating that at the cell level one of your skin cells has a drive for life one skin cell independently only with nothing else around it still has a dry for life as going to try to make something bigger than itself and so it becomes poorly differentiated meaning that it doesn't make skin anymore instead it makes what we would call a tumor. It's creating a pluripotent nor more multidimensional cell and starts proliferate because it can't repair itself. The hallmark of a cancer cell is lonely cell that can't repair itself and so it's only choice in its highest state of damages to to proliferate but what's fascinating about that is that the malignancy is triggered by the disconnection from the community and the network right and this is something that that operates at the micro level but is also ultimately very true at the at at the most macro level of how we live. I mean means they get that guy climbed up to the hotel there to shoot all those people in Las Vegas Right. It's like he's like a he is a cancer who is activated aided in a malignant way through disconnection and he's out to try to find self identity through destruction of the environment and I think that's why we create war. I think nations go to war for trying to find self identity because they've lost their core and so they go kill other things to try to find some relevance or some sense of power because they lost it and this is what terrifies me that we haven't had a we're on our soil in over one hundred years civil war being our last major one is that we're going to do that again to find ourselves yeah well one of the things that's interesting about. Your work is is that the path forward forward involves creating connection but even more so it's about discovering the connection that's already there like in this this idea of the quorum sensing that you talk <music> now like we are already more connected than we're consciously aware of and developing a means of of kind of understanding on an intuitive and unconscious as well as conscious level the connection that we all share there is a way of overriding that sense of disconnection that is creating all of these problems. It's perfect transition so quorum sensing is a description of a hyper super intelligence in my in my reading of it so <hes> bacteria and fungi can create massive communities which suddenly take on a ultra intelligence that's far beyond the capacity of any individual within the community Hannity and so in in the fungal world we can see chemical responses to a nutrient load for example so if you deposit a bunch of fertilizer on one corner of farm the entire my seal colony starts to sense an imbalance in the ecosystem across many acres and you go and biopsy the soil on the other side of the farm a few weeks later and you find that the nutrients you just dumped in here suddenly appeared over here and so there's a intelligent distribution of resources through very complicated very distant you know systems and so that's one way in which we watch quorum sensing happen but a bigger one can be seen as we can keep moving up the biologic chain and <hes> a good example is trees and so <hes> if you let cattle <hes> into a new paddock that they've never been they all go for the trees I we you think of them as as as grass eaters but they always shoot for the trees I and so the goal for the trees and they'll eat all of the lower leaves off the trees and suddenly the trees sensing the the damage being done <hes> we'll wait for a period of time until it reaches a point where realize that that's going to be a detrimental of detrimental effect which is interesting that there's a rate of loss. That's not gentleman. It's probably good for it. So the tree is getting pruned by the Cowan it recognizes that as being beneficial to encourage more crowned growth and more growth up top and then it suddenly senses okay that's enough and it puts out a chemical to make the leaves bidder can cows will immediately stop eating thrust leaves so then move move onto the grass the drafts do this in African <hes> tree systems as well and so the drought will come in and new space start eating and they'll eat entire tree unless of course there's there sensing happening in the tree suddenly exerts <hes> this this new chemical shift and it gets bitter and that but interestingly they've now recognized that an entire grove of trees will sense that one trees response and entire Grove will go bidder simultaneously and so there's intelligent communication happening between trees cover you know large square mile kind of spaces and so there's this hyper intelligence that happens when organisms start cooperately recognize themselves of being able to achieve of a bigger network of sensing communication and ultimately processing and information processing and therefore intelligence and we see this repeated in nature everywhere we look from the hive mind and the way that bees as you know colonizing operate from the migration of birds and we kind of tend to look at it and say why wouldn't it be cool if like humans could communicate like that like the board in Star Trek in the dark version of that I suppose opposed but but but to what extent is is the human organism able to communicate in a more networked fashion like this yeah so <hes> before Foia human-to-human. Actually I just came to me that <hes> there's something maybe you help me great this. Actually that'd be fun together. <hes> I had a moment when I was snorkeling off the coast of <hes> to Mexico <hes> many in years ago now but I was <hes> in in this was in my alone phase. I decided I was going to be among my first couple. Conversations with with Jen was how I was a monk and I was never been another relationship and all of this and so she apparently saw through all of that <hes> bullshit story that I was creating for myself and cubicle at a new identity of <hes> I'm a monk and <hes> and so but I was in among mode and the and as <hes> feeling disconnected and one in connect in my life and <hes> where I often feel most connected as as floating in the ocean alone over a coral reef and just watching this mm civilization blow me that I don't really feel any belonging to but I just watch it and all of its beautiful connectivity and I'm fascinated by the tiniest things in coral reefs right like the big fish are cool but I'm just fascinated by little hair like structures that wave if back and forth and what the hell are those doing and like how those things are finding purpose in just being a hair that waves back and forth all day in the ocean it just goes back and forth and back and forth back and forth back and forth and that that little hair like thing on the court has never woken up with us an identity crisis. It's like no this is what I do. I'm in flow. I'm like I got the ocean and the waves and I can sense what's going on the other side of the ocean because ripples happen through can sense that and connected I I'm like I'm the sensory system for the entire planet that seventy percent water and my God how beautiful is that to be a sensory fiber for the ocean itself and know what's happening on the planet. I am coral reef and he get in that state and it's like okay this is this is a frigging beautiful. You start to get yourself in there and so I decided you know there was a day where I didn't have time to go travel to one of the reasons that I always loved traveling too but I just wanted to get out in the wires. I started swimming out with my snorkel on and just going out. There was no expectation of reef because it was all sand out there and swam and swam I am and then started finds not really reef per se but chunks of coral chunks of you know it's amazing. <hes> does fern corals that are out there and stuff like that and says found some cool things and I was like that's Nice and pop my head bat looked out and realize I was way further away from the shore than I ever really been and I got a little panic because I'm not like super swimmer dude or anything anything like that and just that little moment of like Oh my God I hope I can get back. That's a long ways and and so I started back and I'm swimming back and you know quickly got over that little panic attack and it was like okay I just keep out and got my head back down in the water water and screws in and and suddenly got surrounded by a massive school of Sardines and this went on for forty five minutes that I was in the swarm of sardines and it's more life than you can even really begin the end to describe. I mean this thing must have been a quarter mile in length. At least you know this this massive school of fish and <hes> interestingly as soon as I I saw it coming and I didn't you know it I know what it was. It looked like a ship or something something like that like it looked like a big solid structure coming to me and look above the water. There's nothing there and it's coming at me so fast that it wasn't like I'm going to run away from this thing. I'm going to get hit by this thing and by the time they were about ten feet away I can start to pick out that they were all these certain the heads of all these fish and then they swarm came around me and they respected my field to I'd say probably almost exactly six inches like they were just completely around me and I was completely engulfed and had very quickly lost orientation whereas you lose sense of up and down because there's no sunlight you're just in silver just flashing silver up down all around and I got so excited I was like they can see me and I could push my hands fast as I could out in the water and I couldn't touch fish and there's a go that and they'd be six inches all the way around my arm and it looked and I put my arm back and I couldn't even see a whole like they would closing on that space so fast that I couldn't sense the speed and so they were this ultimate quorum right there this ultimate organism made of probably hundreds of millions of fish. They're all like a few inches long and they cover now and so they're moving pass me pretty quickly over this forty five minute period and then you know swarms thing and some minutes into this. I start to get really panicked because I'm I think that I'm starting to become sardine. I'm starting to have so much sardine energy around me that I'm like. It's it was exciting for those first few minutes. It was like this is I'm having a once in a lifetime home in you know you all have had those moments and we're like this will never happen again. I'm probably the only human experiences right now on this planet and you're you're in that elated sense and then pretty soon. You're like you know I. I don't know what life is going to be. After this moment like nothing's the the same after this moment and I would say that many this week are in a sardine moment of your starting to sense and energy field. There's an organism that you're starting to plug into that. You've always been craving but you're feeling of <unk> of a fear of loss of identity because nothing's going to be the same when you go back if it is you missed a big opportunity. You need to become sardine here okay you. You need to become buffalo here as you have. The Sardine car thirty and so starting was such an interesting experience and one of the I didn't even realize this but this is freaking profound and comes right back to where we started. which is about you know some minutes into this experience? I had become sardine. I'd become relaxed into that that okay. I'm probably still going to be human on the other side of this. I will be changed <hes> but I'm not actually actually sardine yet and so I got past that panic attack and then suddenly these explosions of bubbles around me just massive ex micro bubble explosions and I couldn't figure out what it was for some time and then I happen to you have a clearing in the fish long enough for me to see <hes> Pelican feet on the water's surface around me and realized that the Pelicans were bursting in but they're tr- they're traverse through the water and then backup with efficient. Her mouth was so fast that my I wasn't quick enough in that ten thousandth of a second to see it your I can perceive at about that ten thousands of a second rate and so by the time I was sensing something all I could see was bubbles and so I couldn't track their trajectory through the water because it was beyond that that speed at which my is capable of capturing neurologically what I was seeing and as soon as I saw the Pelican feet and split-second I figure out what's going on. I feel this immediate. Emotional reaction of my friends are getting eaten like this. This is terrible that we're having loss and I and I went there for just a split second and Sardine said back to me like somebody screaming at me no like wrong and I I tied back into that energy and there had been elation event in this group of fish. They were elated in this moment of Pelicans hitting and there was his rise in energy happening in this thing as transformation was happening had a very very high energetic level and so they there was zero empathy for the loss of their brethren and you see that same thing when one million man march into war there's there's a loss of empathy for the individual and there's only a sense of human suffering and there's human victory and I wanna be a part of that and I'm just as willing to be part of human suffering and loss of life as I am to be part of the victory and that is just the blind and so I think in warfare we can reach the state of non empathic presence and so our challenge now is humans as I believe to reach non empathic presence without war. What if we can non-impact ethically witness loss of life you mentioned? How can we possibly not treat with with opiates? Somebody's suffering at the end of life because we feel for them well. That's where we fucked things up. I think as we start having all these emotional responses to this situation which inevitably is selfish because your emotions have nothing to do with that person's journey and your pudding year journey on that person's thing projecting all your crap on that situation of somebody who's in a train and what is that going to do to their energy field is going to drop their energy and they're going to suffer more for it and so my nurses on the hospice environment did the best thing in the world world which was touch patients in the most powerful ones used ricky which is an age old technique for not touching them just with skin but touching them with energy and put raising their vibration and pain goes down immediately immediately and so a non empathic approach to pain and loss of life raises vibration these fish demonstrated this incredible way of they realized that there was a cycle of life happening right now and they wanted to be a part of that and they were not afraid of that cycle of life they were they in fact were excited. They were thrilled by opportunity being engaged in the cycle of life which was death and rebirth that same story takes Cathodic Victor Berger <hes>. If you haven't heard Victor Schau Burger you got to look this guy up one of the greatest minds of twentieth century and probably one of the most unheralded geniuses of that century <hes> he he was a forester and and that's why he didn't get much attention Austrian forester fifth generation Austrian forest or in the same force so magin the intelligence that would come into human being that for five generations his dad grandfather grandfather father grandfather grandfather had been observing the same section of Austrian highland force what intelligence would come from that kind of quorum sensing multi generational intelligence and when you read Victor Schau Burger you see what comes is out of that. This man is a forester had more profound discoveries of human biology than any physician or scientists in that century he discovered that the heart is not a pump for blood. He discovered discovered that how fish can sit dead still in a fast running river and not move not be swept downstream. Have you guys seen that before isn't that the weirdest thing have even ask yourself. Why is that happening? Fast running stream and the fish is dead still not moving no effort to but he's not being swept into the Kern and he figured out that the shape of the fish scales are designed signed those river fish to create an a sweep of energy across the scale that creates a negative charge on the back side of that scale that pulls the fish forward and so the fish is creating a magnet that is equal equal exactly to the speed of the water and so the water flows faster pulls forward faster than slows down it slows down at the exact rate such that it doesn't move and it doesn't need to move a fin to stay in exactly the same they lost is the water that's traveling by it that guy figure that shit out without any devices with anything he figured it out staring at nature and observing nature this exquisite level and one of the observations he made. The ties back to the sardines where I would love for you and I to get to as human beings as he had long witnessed and wrote about even <hes> this phenomenon that in these high mountain lakes of Austria he he would see see an eagle circling a lake and it would go into a tighter and tighter circle in that lake and Paul and then he would see a fish following the shadow of of the Eagle and Eagle would pull it into tighter and tighter vortex and and right at the center of the Lakewood grab the fish and take off and so he had this whole amazing theory that he observed of how Eagles go fishing and they create a vortex of energy and pull efficient at the vortex and then some years later he happened to look down he was high enough in just the right trajectory where he saw a fish swimming in a giant circle around the outside of Lake. He's like that's weird so he sat down and sure enough kept seeing combine laps and did this for about thirty minutes before an eagle came and started following the fish and got tighter and tighter tighter and tighter and he said I've seen this dance before and he realized is this time that in the last couple of split seconds the Eagle never reached inside the water the fish jumped out of the water into the towns of the Eagle so he realized all those years he was not observing eagles fishing. He was observing fish jumping to a different plane. That's so interesting to me what if we saw death as a heightening of our experience an opportunity to go four dimensional dimensional release ourselves of these three D. environments q matching the fish that was limited that lake for its entire existence and then got to soar into the sky for a few seconds to witness what the mountains look like see see down at that lake that it had spent its entire life with and be like Oh my God. That was the frigging box I've been stuck in. Is it a little speck of water down there in these grandiose mountains. Oh my God there's lakes all over the place. I didn't realize Gosh just look at the freaking expanses of life round me and that's exactly what my patients come back from the dead with why the hell you pull me back here you brought me right back into the box and I am in pain and you've stuck latex Cuban every orifice of my body and I don't want to be here and you keep touching me goddamn latex gloves I just want to be connected back to universe and the connected at a high level to nature you're yearning for that and you'll get there and we were running a pretty good rate of pretty damn near one hundred percent death for humankind and so you can get to that expansion and we're cruising there now as a species you know Inge Jimbotalks so well yesterday about you know this this speed of the loss of life that we're now in was. She wasn't asleep but beautiful. Yesterday I just so blessed to to listen to you you yesterday there. There's such hope in somebody finding truth in their life and being willing to blow up their paradigm only frigging crazy doctor and all of that frigging crazy island of the U._k.. Willing to be as crazy as you are that's ridiculous and brave and interesting and you're breaking apart cubicles that people have put you in your breaking apart in education in that built a box for you to be in in your blowing that apart and I think that's what makes your whole podcast compelling as you interview people that have had to through often real hardship blow up their paradigm and blow up that cubicle define themselves larger than what they thought they were before but there's so much beauty in that destruction right and I and I think it does it does relate to these stories that you're talking about with the fish and the Eagle on the sardines <hes> in the sense that we there. Maybe we need to blow up this paradigm that we've constructed around you know empathy for suffering and the life and death cycle right so it's like from your through your Lens in these stories that you've just told <hes> the most empathetic thing that we can actually do is is to suspend our empathy and the rationale behind that is to broaden the aperture through which we perceive life and death and suffering and growth you one of the things that Julie Talks about a lot is is not depriving people of their divine moment like this this empathy that we have for pain and suffering at the end of end of life can easily be applied to how we approach people in their various suffering moments throughout life to suspend empathy is also to respect and empower the person who's going through whatever they're going through so that they can fully embrace what's being presented to <hes> so that they have the <hes> the facility to undergo that transformation for themselves to blow up their own paradigm about who they are so that they can get to that next place hugely important and I guarantee you that each of you who are in a relationship right now are in some ways palliative your partner and you're you're trying to Sav- their pain and therefore keeping them from transformation and we do this out of altruism ism but it's a it's a a broken model of altruism is misguided misguided altruism and so we show what we think is compassionate one another which in the end is selfishness because we're were exercising our moment to redefine our self identity as a compassionate person or as a giver or as a server and also selfishly using that person's pain to to buoy up ourselves identity which is vampiric work really. It's completely invert and you will come to feel this in your life. When you get good at recognizing these patterns of your own behavior he'll suddenly realize that people are literally vampires on your energy and they're sucking life out of you and you created those you literally like walked up to the vampires like we wanted to suck on this? Is this like here's my corroded. Just take the radio artery. It's right here yeah oh you too. I got another one no problem I've got here. You can suck my ankle. Your you are grading yourself intentionally to maintain some belief system about why you're valuable. Don't don't empathic approach the people around you to support your sense of identity. It's it's the most awful thing that we could do each other is to leach onto a moment of pain and suffering so that we can feel better about ourselves and so you need to stop being so abusive to one another in your self professed care for one another <hes> we were talking before the podcast and you were telling me about this study among college students solving this puzzle and and how that Kinda applies to this super consciousness nests that we have can you just share that so I think that you probably felt that though but in the description of the Sardines for example did you or the coral reef. Did you have a moment where you felt that extension of intelligence like he we suddenly feel like Oh yeah I could literally stick my toe in the ocean and if I sat there long enough I could sense everything that's going on the planet. You know there's that level of connectivity so corum sensing as we started with there is that flaws fee that <hes> in the end everything's electrons and <hes> everything's electrons interacting with protons and so this is accounts for about point zero zero zero one percent of the space that we live in and so we are ninety nine point nine nine nine seven percent vacuum space and so is everything the planet the microbiome everything's back space and so we have almost nothing solid but what is solid is these little protons that have recently been recognized to have the same mm structure as the black hole. That's in the middle of our galaxy and so these black holes are these massive energetic centers of gravity that pulling everything including light energy and kick stuff back out and sew Stephen Hawkins <hes> <hes> became <hes> known for many great discoveries but one of them was the hawkins particles again named after him and he recognized that black holes out in our space putting out all these particles of information in this digital data that's flowing out of black holes and yelled for longtime that I was just chaotic information and then more recently a lot of astrophysicists came to the agreement that no that's structured information and through other work in astrophysics. They've realized that all the black holes are connected through wormholes and the like can so blackhall's holes are connected. There's a black hole at the center for pretty much every galaxy out there and so we have billions of galaxies throughout the universe and so we have billions of black holes all connected and that's all fascinating and when you start to think about what would be the structured data coming out of black holes throughout the universe does that start to resemble what we might call the intention of God or the inflammation of a super computer. There's a super intelligence engines that is a process through all the black holes in the universe and so there's a stream of information of data structured coming out of all the black holes and flowing into the entire universe and from that we see the organization of plasma matter and planets and solar systems and galaxies and ultimately organisms on those planets and then humans and then we rushed down into the cells within your hand and then you look down in your hand you realize okay that's all atomic structure churn us zip down deeper and this is all all <hes> made out of these little tiny protons ultimately and so then assume haramain. WHO's an incredible physicists right now if you haven't seen his stuff you need to look up in the Siem N._A._S._S.? I am Haramain H.. Cer are <hes> butcher that last name E. M. E. I. N.. Haramain seems work is showing that the Proton is a tiny tiny black hole and functions with all the physical features the black hole and what's rushing in and out of the black holes electrons and the electrons are speeding across environments and exchanging information and <hes> what how this manifest then is exchange of information at the atomic level and at the atomic level of these atoms exchanging insider protons which are basically the central processing units of these of a computer and so you got this ep that's processing all the information coming out of the Electron Electron reacts with his environment and then comes back into the Proton trying to tell the Proton what it just experienced Proton then just kicks out okay. This is what's my environment and so now informs all the electrons that come in and okay this is what these spirits is out there and then all the black holes or communicating what all the protons in your body which is billions in billions and billions and billions and billions are all communicating and the electrons are exchanging very quickly and so over this hour and a half or whatever we've been in this room together. We've all exchanged almost all of our electrons very quickly. You know all of the atoms in all of our cells tells Oliver Molecules exchanging electrons we have this huge cloud of electrons in year that have all exchanged now transit and transit into the protons in exchange information the speed at which this happens is proved in these experiments that that we were talking about and so they take groups of thirty or forty students college students and give them a really difficult word word puzzle so crossword puzzle and they time how long it takes for this group of students to solve this puzzle together and then as soon as they click the timer okay forty-five amends whatever it was they didn't wait five minutes and then they start a second group of students across campus on the same word puzzle and every time they've done this. The second group finishes a few minutes faster and so even across the distance campus electrons are exchanged fast enough that there's a a universal knowingness that's developing in the environment and you guys have all witnessed this over time. How many have you have grandchildren Britain no grandparents in room one brand grandparent the room? Does anybody have kids or nieces and nephews under the age of five and so oh a few more people in the room. What is the reaction that child to a small rectangular box that we would call an iphone that kid will learn to crawl all just so it can get to the iphone that kid will scream bloody murder on an airplane until mom finally hands over the iphone she doesn't want to because he doesn't want the kid F- screen time doesn't want the kid to be holding a radiation device but eventually eventually mom gives them because the kid is fixated on this frigging little rectangle? This is core sensing at the greater level now is these children are born into an environment where information technology is in such a high level of experience periods in the human consciousness right now that the child knows that that's what it must want more than anything else because their parents are spending more time on that little box than anything else it more than any relationship in their lives. They will spend more time on that box in a day they will talk to their own spouse. They will spend more time on that box than they will interact with their boss. It must be the most important thing our children can sense that and so they don't know why it's the most important thing one year old has no idea what the freaked the boxes all they know is very very important and they have a facility in that technology that after decades of using those damn things I can't match a three year old is way better on an iphone than I am because there's this constant electrical exchange of information and experience and so we should take massive pause and asked what is the quorum sensing right now through my contribution. What is your daily L. Experience contributing to higher electrical state of humanity? Are you touching anybody in a day. Can we do ourselves a favorite now and can we just hold <music> hold hands for the next hour long. Is this whole dance which will look awkward but isn't it interesting interesting that we don't even do this very often right like it's like the frigging simplest thing in the world okay. I've got a hand. I'm getting this opposing thumb is kind of cool us in the monkeys and we just fix shit instead of touch each other stuff you guys are all doing maintenance all day long and you're not touching another hand. This is the best pain control not only that we go out of our way to avoid this. This is very awkward invulnerable yeah and frightening. We both got the black thing too. I noticed that when we sat down like Shit we kind of Dorky up here but got got the men in black thing going on up here and now we're holding hands and that on some level you think is kind of awkward awkward hand. It feels really good like your hand feels really nice rich. It's not sweating yet and might start sweating. It's really lovely because you have a softness to the palm. That's kind of hugging on yes. And what are you doing. After this yeah I'm free my wife left this morning. Joy just gave permissions. I feel I got the hall pass. We're good certainly you guys are touching somebody next to you and in that touch your exchanging amazing amount of information that's invisible. You can't see it and you don't know it yet. You don't even know what you're absorbing from that person next to you yet and I'm really glad I'm touching riches he because he's talked to a lot of really smart people over the last decade and something absorb all kinds of brilliance out of this hand guesses closer is for a second so we can more immerse ourselves was in that feeling of that person's hand a little pulse of love out both hands now just a little pulse to get dramatic about it. Control yourselves pulse do something far more difficult that I don't even know if I know how to do which is opened up your heart right now and be willing to absorb all the other love you have so blocks right there walking around so protected such a well constructed Cuba core Andrew Heart. You're afraid you're unlovable so just take it down down the cubicle walls. I don't think anybody's really opened up their heart. 'cause nobody's really exhaling huge right now. Let's just try to take a deep breath and let it all the way <music> out. Just go back to your chest now. Turn your attention back to your poems and just gently ask for love. I just want some love and let it run up your arms start to fill in. Just let's take another deep breath together and stuck in a let love new kid in this moment experience everything that everybody. Everybody else in this room has experienced all the knowledge they've collected all of the intelligence that they are capable of all of the service they've given to their loved ones and turns out. They're all just as good as you are pouring love out and they're just as bad as you are taking in and so the sheer amount of available love in this room is infinite. There's so much unabsorbed love in here and I think that's why we are suffering so much. Humanity is we've disconnected from the Vortex Matrix of love that is literally emanating out of all of this all the time and we can't even figure out how to plug back into Q. are so loved. I want to go back in time right now to the womb here we are right now. We're at some age and we're GONNA start traveling back swiftly go through your mind's eye whatever hit age twenty and it's great to be twenty such a cool. Now you're ten. You haven't had to go through the fuck puberty shit yet you just like still like in that wonderful magical moment of being ten when life still very simple like you just WanNa go ride bikes with your friends. Remember when your ten and you catch a perfect till on her bike and you're just flying down it is clear freedom. No efforts win weapon by remember when you were five digging your first big hole on the ground. I don't know why we're driven to dig holes but we do that. All the time. You were kid digging a hole somewhere on a beach or backyard. Just remember how tiny your hands are yeah when you're five so funny oh hands are so damn cute and their funding almost kind of puffy fat little hands and then you're like two. You're just like so pleased with yourself because you can walk from the coffee table over over to the shelf to rip something off the bookshelf so pleased with yourself to and then suddenly you're this newborn and you're just blowing your mind over the beauty of the world came out of this like kind of glow e <music> warm space owes nothing very distinct to see and you're just in this cacophony of collar sound voices taking all that in the brain that has no idea what it seeing yet but deeper down in that new one is a very knowing soul and if we back up into the womb now where you're just an embryo not even in fully formed yet I think they're still at some point in that transition between single cell and newborn baby. You're animated by this energy field and this energy field has a deep knowingness in it's been in the universe since the beginning of whatever creation was and you're in the womb with us deep knowingness inside yourself and your the collision of a little bit of d._N._A.. From Mom and dad that helps give structure to the interaction with an electric field that will then manifest a personality that can't be coded for in the genes. It's easy to feel like amazing parent when you have one child but then when you have a second child todd you suddenly realize you have nothing to do with this process there so different as like some possibly different from that first child and you're like what because you're not actually from your parents I would like you all to dwell on that for a very long moment moment right now. You are not from your parents so stop blaming them. They didn't create you. Are you kidding now. They're just lost confused. Human beings you came from something much bigger much deeper knowingness a much deeper wisdom to sit out for a moment. You're not from your parents. That's wonderful so we have to stop blaming them for their shortcomings or their successes we can we can either give them credit nor nor ridicule for whatever happened in the parenting journey and the dominant emotion that I find underlying disease take care of his abandonment at some point you had a moment where you felt abandoned and it can seem really trivial and it was really trivial like your parents went out on a date for you woke up from a nap. You didn't know they were going to gone and they were gone and you felt suddenly terrified and lonely like your parents are banned you and turns out that the babysitter was just laid and they showed up and I hear those little things all the time in fact that's what engendered the first moment of you thought you were abandoned and sometimes it's awful horrific things awful abuses and all kinds of things they made you feel abandoned but I want you to realize in the same way that you are not from your parents. There's no way they could have abandoned you nor could they give you any actual companionship on the spiritual level they are no more connected with their soul than anybody else and so they were no more capable of really being present with you. They were there biologically for you but they didn't know how to connect connect with you at that spiritual level and my big victory of my last decade was really finding out that when my mom was pretty sick when I was growing up she had epilepsy and as always having seizures and so in this caretaking mode early on in my life oldest child of four kids so it's kind of taking care of my siblings while she's having seizure taking care of her and I remember being a grocery store with her head on my lap and she's having a seizure and people are freaking out around me and patiently I stopped having seizure those kinds of experiences. I ended up holding within me that I wasn't being nurtured. I wasn't being cared for I was lonely because my mom can be there to take care of me and I found out a few years years ago doing some deep work with a mile fashioned therapist releasing grief and the sense of I wasn't nurtured to find out the embarrassing and humbling and incredible reality that there had been angels shawls all over me in every one of those moments at the Seoul level nurturing my soul never letting go of me and that changed my whole perception of my story. My the story had been a kid with a sick mom take care of people and when I realized I'm a Soho that's ancient. That's been nurtured at the highest level of vibration since before I came into this body and especially while I've been in this body Eddie so give up your story. Your story is not one of hardship. I guarantee it. Our forefathers generations had some hardships that we have never known but deeper than and there is no hardship on the social level because the souls move as a sardine would those souls that Sola within you is literally as as non empathetic and non empathic as the fish. It's just seeking a higher vibration and it's asking you to a higher vibration and so you are an ancient soul wrapped up at this moment you are not abandoned at any moment you have been cared for on a level that defies our understanding our words. The word Angel is not sufficient. These are beings of light. These are beings of energy that we have really no construct understanding our human minds and they're all around us. We don't even understand that. We don't know why we don't know how to interact with entirely but life is not the way it looks around. You and you're GONNA get there faster to the state of being being willing to let go of your cubicle. What story have you been telling everybody that you have got to get got run? I want you to rebirth right now. You're in the womb right now and I just want you to come back into this world with completely fresh eyes travel down that birth canal dark tunnel light at the end of that tunnel. There's total chaos at the town for all your perceptive limitations because you're about to step back into the world without any of your previous constructed self-identity in that's gonNa feel like chaos. You're not going to be able to make immediate sense of everything because you're gonNA keep checking yourself say that my old story be you willing to be completely rebirth and we need to do that every single day because you're so patterned and creating a new story and you're just going to go build another one and you're gonNA fashion a new cubicle and you're going to be very super pleased with it. I think it's all shiny and cool and you'll be just as stuck as you were before and so but while the core manifest what are we going and do with our time so that we set in motion electrons would inform not just our fellow man but the children that would come after us. What are the whales GonNa sense right now can connect with those fish and whales in the sea right now and say I'm sorry I'm so sorry for all the plastic in your belly? I'm so sorry for our selfish dominance. This is planet. Thank you for your grace and your willingness to connect instantaneously with us. Thank you for welcoming us in Sardinia in Buffalo and Wolf Eagle Fish Egg whatever card you pulled this week. Once you go to that space for a moment go to your egg for a moment go to your card and think think about that. What were you called to become this week? Have you let go enough of your story that you can become that thing. Thank you for that beautiful offering. How's everybody feel reborn? Appreciate you my friend. Thank you. Thank you for being here with all of us believe you. It's so ridiculous that you showed up seven billion people on the planet and you guys showed up seven billion. This is the cream of the frigging crop right here seven billion rows right now this week to become something bigger than yourself happened to something deeper and I love it that you guys pull this trick on everybody guys Vegan thing and we're gonNA get some good food mood we run bullshit. Guys are like fricking wrecking ball of previous lifetimes frigging love this place thank you for the sneak attacks. Thank you for the well-designed trust and that's actually what you've created in your podcast and we've come to trust you in the language the the information you share with us. We've come to trust these layers of education. You guys put out in the world and that trust allowed us to come to this place where we could be in deep relationship without having been known each other before <hes> since you're a friend of rich and Julia my friend too and that started us off a really strong point and <hes> we've built some really cool friendships that obviously you can hear all the exchanges like the Cuban really but again is you keep touching each other and you're GonNa be you're GonNa go back can do an environment look at home where everybody thinks they know so you are very carefully tribes rise cubicle consciousness. Everybody and I think that we can actually get to a sardine moment without that catastrophic south and disappearance of our species that were cruising towards and so we've got about thirty years to figure it out. If we don't figure out in thirty years we will see the highest level of suffering ever measured in human history as we claps to our standpoint and if that's our path let's hold onto this moment to for that is that we need to be non empathic non emotional about the demise of our species as well and we need to know that at that appoint we're just one giant fish jumping into the Townsville bigger eagle that we can't see yet and so we don't need to be overly dramatic about the end of our species or this sixth extinction. It's okay it's our path mother. Earth sought common and she's recovered from from massive extinctions before and life just explodes right back and so we should be in no question of of the good stuff on the other side but if in the next thirty years you guys start really being vulnerable enough to your whole communities and really seeking more hand holding in your life we're gonNA frigging create a new society and I'm very excited. Bring more stuff to you as to what my tribe is doing back in the states and around the world now we have a whole team of thinkers that are going to keep bringing stuff to you. Guys is so rich and I I think are going to have an opportunity to roll out one of the biggest stories of human history in these next couple of months as we we start to tell a story about the rise and fall of empire and we tell a story about what are the patterns of human behavior that need to be destructive because not only have each of us constructed a story our societies in our empires have constructed a story that is keeping us from our fullest capacity to become one and become one species A._B._C.'s that would be a quorum and would act at extremely high intelligence level. That's literally never been witnessed before and we will connect to alien species and we will connect all kinds of things in this universe and physical and non physical through an actual core event when seven billion people become one and are willing to share everything most of all love and whatever that is and so I'm honored to being you can't wait for the next Chapter Sun full right that guy just never disappoints so cool such a blessing to be able to share his powerful message with all you guys here today. Hope you guys enjoyed it for even more on Dr Bush check the show notes on the episode page at ritual Dot Com <hes> go to his website Sec Bush M._d.. Dot Com and I would also suggest visiting farmers footprint dot U._S.. Where you can watch the first installment of his Docu series and learn more about the farmers footprint mission and should you be so moved <hes> contribute to the cause again? I want to thank everyone who attended our retreat in Italy for collectively raising eighty one thousand dollars dollars for that project you guys are amazing and finally let Zach know how this one landed for you by sharing your thoughts with him directly on twitter at Dr Zack Bush or on Instagram at Zach Bush M._d.. If you want support the work we do here on the podcast. Tell your friends about your favorite episode or about the show in general share what you're listening to on social media. Take a screen grab tag me. I like to reach wheat that stuff or share it on instagram subscribe to the show on apple podcast podcast spotify Youtube Google podcast. Wherever you listen to this or watch it leave a review on Apple podcast and you can support our work on patriotic at ritual dot com forward slash donate great appreciation to everybody who helped put on this show today day Jason Cameo Low for audio engineering production show notes interstitial music my Stepson Tyler Piat who handled the audio engineering in Italy to record this to capture it <hes> Blake Curtis Margot Lubin? There was no video this time but hey hey blake's with me today doing audio engineering work so many thanks to you guys nonetheless Jessica Miranda for Graphics Decay for advertiser relationships <hes> Laya Morass Bitch for photographs of this this episode in Italy and Theme Music is always by Alibaba appreciate you guys I love you without you guys nothing. I will see you back here next week with a great conversation with my friend the actor titus well of her. He's one of those guys you see A._M.. And you're like that guy. This guy's been in everything you like. I don't know if I know his name but he's got you probably know him from Bausch. <hes> the T._V. Series on Amazon. He's a great dude. We had a great conversation. You're not gonNA WANNA miss it so stay tuned and until then as Dr Bush says pain can be a great teacher become comfortable with being uncomfortable piece plants uh-huh.