6. This Episode Is Not Titled "Dilly Dilly"

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Can't wait to hear more episodes of freedom. I know you can't well you can binge. Listen to the entire season ad free. Now on Stitcher premium for a free month of premium go to Stitcher, premium dot com slash three them and use promo code three them everyone. Thanks for listening to three them before we get to that. We wanted to tell you that fear wolf that's the Halloween version of your well. Yeah. I know. Oh, sorry, Paul. Hi, paul. I'm also part of three items. Yes. I'm scott. Trying to squeeze me out to them. Fear will wants to wish you a happy Halloween. And that's why we're back to tell you about the brand new my secret. Visitors t-shirt available only on pods. Wag dot com. Shirt. The image was sent to us by a mysterious Twitter user whose name escapes us. But alludes. It hides from us. And it's a picture inspired by inspired by coming up and originally heard. That's right inspired by an upcoming episode. Where we make fun of the commercial for Parkinson's. Not not commercial advertising four Parkinson's. Yes. We're not making fun of the actual. No, the commercial is extremely dramatic. And we make fun of the dramatic part of the commercial. Yes. This spooky shirt makes a great addition to your collection, and you can also shop the full line of three TS pins signed posters and more. Go to pods. Swag dot com slash read them to get your shirt before they sell out L sell out. They will sell out that it's pod. Swag dot com slash three. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's burger cheeseburger cheeseburger. Hi, ruin we're back. It's us again. I'm across. Run the lady with the goat on her sweater. Learn less woman's inside. It's time across from a man with juice to white shirt. Nothing. Nothing. Donald Duck in. Quack quack, and I and right across from this motherfucker wearing too short Steve Bannon style, Scott Ackerman, Steve Bannon where one button down with a t shirt on no to button downs on top of each. You got to look for fatigues. So crazy. I don't understand. That's like a like a rich preppy. Look, it's some sort of naval station. I don't really know what it is a naval ethic. Tation? Oh, wow. I mean from from the navy not the belly button. Tation from his belly button mummy. He's just floating away in them. Welcome to the show everyone. This is the show where we talk about stuff. Do you just you just saw it? It's tight tight. Eight dated someone without a belly button. Why why was it Patricia Heaton? Why did she not have one or he? Thank you. Because of some sort of way that she was born. It was interesting. That she was poured cloud umbilical cord is the sex. Don't know you have to have no Bill core. It was it was through some other. It was not in that part of her body or something. It was interesting. You need to have more info. While ago. I don't recall the Dietz. Weird. It was. I mean, it was there was nothing. What what's weird IRS? The fact that we all have something there, isn't it like we all have some. But we all do. No, no. But you know, what? But you know, what her new if you ever did was it shocking. Or was it more? Like, you're just like, okay. It would. I mean, it definitely was. It was interesting. It was definitely one of those things where I'm like, oh, this is your brain doesn't register it the right way of like, oh, there's there should be something there. But it it certainly is you know, I would just have a hole somewhere else that you saw. Is that what you're asking belly button? But it was on her. But like where I'm just saying. Is there a place where like you would you would put the bicycle pump into pumper up every night? On guys. Talking doll doll. What if I was in a relationship with a sex doll? I there are people. There are people like large or the real girl. There you have you watched like those shows where it's like my strange sex, addiction, or whatever I saw one about someone who eight drywall. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. My stains addiction that one or the woman who's like eight couch and she eats like the couch. Out that she'd eat and like many cushions up till that point like she would just swallow because she would just like grab this stuffing. She dreamy of eating a marshmallow. Yes. See we grab the like the Ripa bull stuffing cotton. But like when it's like kind of. Are you saying the cotton the fabric? Yeah. That the lady way drywall that was she would just sit on the couch, and she would like reach into a hole that she had like dug into her wall. And then she would just thing, isn't it? And it's when you have Hika. Oh, Mel I've only read it. I think it's pica. Okay. It's when you have a desire for something like that or something which has a lot of irons, you're actually trying to fulfill a need that your body has women happens to pregnant with me and babies kids, but they'll eat dirt. But it's interesting my my nephew who's a baby eats eats dirt and Sand Lake at the only got so much like you go to the bitch. And he's just like eating the sand. As a does he needs something. He's not getting what is the because that made me think about that cigarette butts. Yeah. He loves he loves the containing. I love when a baby eats dirt. They like grab a hell of a potted plant or something. And then they have that look on their face. Doing it. Like, this isn't what he. He likes. Hey, we all know that one. This is usually the show where pollen I know references that Lauren does not know in vice versa. It's true. So I'm glad that we all found common ground on this. I know can you think of a reference that we definitely don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Actually, I was going to mention the last episode. I was like let's go nowhere. All I'm talking about blaming will. Do you know the show Weiner Ville that was on Nickelodeon in the early nineties, and it was a, but I thought you might know it because it was a I'm assuming a comedian who did this show like a man, and he would be the it would be his head. When you were describing the puppet that your dad made me think of this. Okay. It was it would be his head and then like a little body like he'd be a puppet of himself, Nick. Whoa. I don't know the name of the name was Mark Weiner. Okay. Okay. I know a comedian is, but I didn't know about the thing he had a kid show. He used to do this on standup stages. He used to have a little. Well, he would he would. I still remember this like a little table. And then you would put because I think he did this as a street performer to right? He would have like a little sort of black box on the stage where he would make his fist into a puppet on a puppet head on a body and do little stuff and an interesting thing about him was he was an orthodox Jew, and he could not do Saturday night shows. So it was always like that's where the money is when he would come to town. We would get more work because he couldn't do this. Got to do like if you were working if you were the MC you got to then be the featuring big like people. Yes. So this is a big deal. You got the show, but you didn't know about it back, then wouldn't watch that. Exactly. But then if you're if you're a comedian, and you had any any sort of appearance on TV. It would be a big deal when you came. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. These comedy on the road. Yeah. Interesting. That's cool. Okay. Well, I'll tell you think of another one. Like, a you know, what I heard the other day was I guess dilly, dilly is thing. I don't know. What that is. I just saw something about that. I don't know. I said that the other day and. My friend was like, yeah. Dilly, dilly, dilly, do winger post a picture. What is it from a Bud Light commercial? That's what it's from. That's but on everyone says it furious. I. Where's the beef? Visit ironic everyone loves soon, I don't know. I don't know what it means on the commercial means the best kind of person or thing you rescue me when I was blackout drunk, dilly. Daly. So it was. Allen. Thing before this like no can't be from hot on to that extent. Now, I want you to give a reference I'm on, but not superhero come actually excited went into that. Anyway. Okay. Okay. Um from a something from like a commercial, maybe from our childhood guy. Do you remember that? That's so ancient secret was commercial. Do you know that ancient Chinese secret? I think so the Calgon commercial cow goat. I take may away many things, but is Calvin still around. Yeah. Yeah. They are I feel but Calgon Calgon was does it detergent. It was a dish, soap, and I guess it was some sort of bath. Thank you spray. It was also. Well, there's there was a commercial this rent for a million years. Yeah. Where this woman goes into pick up her dry cleaning, and she says to the Asian man behind the counter. How do you get this stuff? Sir stuff is so amazing. How how did you? How do you do it? And he says ancient Chinese secret. And then she sees. No. He doesn't see. Oh, we cut to the back of the dry cleaning from the Simpson. There's the white. There's the wife who says to the camera. My husband some hotshot. All right. Here's his ancient Chinese secret Calgon, and then we talk about Calgon. And then the woman white woman is about to leave the store and pay wife, the the Asian wife appears from the back and says in earshot of this round die. We need more Calgon. And then the white woman turns around and says ancient Chinese secret. I love it. And we saw it so many times that I cannot hear certain things thinking ancient Chinese for. Sure. Yeah. Hi, guys. What's high guy for high guy was I can't remember what the product was high. It was like an alka seltzer or do iota or something. But there was a guy would open his medicine cabinet. And there was another guy on the other side. It was like they shared medicine. That's one of those apartments. Hi, dan. Yeah. Play it. Yeah. Sure. Side note, I just watch jeopardy yesterday and Alex Rebecca never heard of Bob Ross Canadian. How what a dumb douche. So it's how you do. There was a series. Okay. Sure. Just like the Mr. microphone. Right guard there it is. Wow. Well, that's dilly, dilly. I guess is exactly the same thing where they have said that they've said it so much. And now everyone says it football players say it's like. Mad may to doing you wish because commercial is stupid. Isn't there part of you? That wish is you could write commercial job. I feel I think that'd be miserable would be I just feel like I could do it so much better. But I think we're at this point. Now, we're thinks that I could. This point where they just show you the most random thing just get your attention. It has nothing to do with anything. I haven't watched a commercial in years, I feel like because of streaming DVR. So I when stuff like this happens. I don't even know about I don't even know that commercial though that I don't think I've watched like a live event. Here's what it is. It's a bunch of people in it looks like a how much is it fun? What are we talking to? No. It's like it's like a medieval clank is like two hundred and fifty problems, right? Sure. It's like a medieval court, but everyone is twenty five years old. And so there's a king and Queen at this banquet this long, and there they are they're so. I want to break. Okay. Cody. Oh, my not broken. Actually, I want to image a nut when I feel like I told you this story. But there was a kid. I grew up with who had escaped injury and lost trust tickle Ono. His technical. One one. That's what I called Hitler. And was. So what do we know that didn't slide down his late? I don't know what happened with. Nice Twitter kit, and we got. Think about what she said I'm imagining his ball sack sliced open and just one km one blown that just almost like an egg just you know, like suing down, and then he got a noodle. That's what you get your dog's balls cut off some fake balls. Different what? Yes. And they're called noodle. Literally. I don't understand all over it like within. Yeah. Why one hour wait? But do they really want them? I don't know. Why? That's honestly, don't know. Why like the balls are not the thing that I'm like the proudest of? We got rid of. Hi. All line. Never got to get out of nowhere to most. Like, if I happen to be neutered, or whatever, you know, or chemically, castrated, whatever God willing. But if they were just like, hey balls anymore. I wouldn't be like to get them fake ones down there. I gotta say I feel like it would be weird. Pry do you think they're more trouble than they're worth? But I miss him. If they were gone, do you think most like the woman, I dated without the bellybutton? She should have drawn like a little like spy valley. Yes. Every pretended. Wait. You don't want to be with a multi. Let's ninety fiance. No, that's the best show on TV. But the one guy who is who had of a second me fifteen years before he was with this woman. Who was he kept saying, well, you know, have been fixed. I was finished. Bob barker. Now what the fuck where we talking about? We're going to tell it medieval tiny this commercial. Yeah. So people are bringing their they're apparently, they're Dave journeyed from other land bring gifts they're bringing gifts to the king and Queen. And so I brought that somebody brings after each gift is presented the king and Queen say, dilly, dilly. And then everyone in the court says. So annoying. I like it now. Probably. What I say don't do. It. Don't you? I like it dilly bar from Dairy Queen never had one Paul finish the story daily doing there. It's so small commercial. Story. What if you write down, and you only told me? Good night starring role. Medieval fuck -able team. Okay. So this Brown. How's frauds on a brand? So someone brings about away they all say, that's dilly, dilly. Well, he doesn't bring enough for everybody or something like that. And so he's beheaded or some shit. But what's weird about the commercial? Is you feel like in the commercial? This is a reference to something else. Right. And I don't I read an article about it, and they just made up for that. They do admit that there is like maybe a song in the like thirty years ago called dilly, dilly or something, but it was just made up for that. I bet. I bet who made that up is like so he's just a pussy hard. I bet he's got all his balls. I bet he liked me talking about Popeye goes up to someone who Bargo so you ever see daily daily. I wrote that. Probably what that are you. Okay. That makes sense learning you watching the bachelor. Yes, I I think about that. With like people in there having these first conversations with people. Yes. Conversation with someone. I think about Lauren watching the same. I watched it last night. I don't know what I'm saying about it. But I feel bad that they had they had these awkward moments on film. Yeah. I guess so, but they also don't ever seem to have normal. I wish someone would have a normal person conversation. What's so insane? Like everyone's like, they wouldn't be on the show. Meeting kind. They're like I watched you on your season five years ago. I think we have a lot in common. My dad died. And then they're making out, and it's like, really nasty. I don't know the first episode you ever would you ever make someone on TV? I I can't imagine. What scenario that would have news. Oh the. Dallas Raines and tonight, we have learned Lackey's making out with me point flat hand. Yeah. I'd be into that. Tannen. Can you imagine? I remember I remember itself. Tanner would rub off all my favorite. I don't know. What's made our someone on Halloween? Maybe I talked about this was wearing makeup and it rubbed off hundred face. Yeah. But remember, I remember on big brother one of the first couple's ever have sex on that show. And then I saw her in person who had sex. The letters there's harlot on the bachelor it's a little different because you don't see anything besides like making out usually. But unlike real world, they would you people in bed like in the fuzzy black and white. Yeah. You'd see there. But show that so crazy. David come on baby too. Nice. I watched the first season of the real world. And then I didn't watch it again until that sees exactly the same. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's formula was like, so they first different. But then it turned a corner. Now, it's just like now, it's. But like seasons three four five six seven eight. Dilly, dilly, dilly deal that I feel weird when I realized how much older I am than everyone on the show that happened to me. I remember I was watching the real world. I was really into it. And they said, hey, do you want to apply for the real world? I had no interest in it, by the way, let that be said. Are you between the ages of eighteen and twenty five and I was twenty six and I was like I'm too old yet. And everyone on the bachelor there's a lot of people whether like twenty two well, that's the thing. I was watching. I was watching the other day. And and you know, part of the day just walking down the street just the other day. But I, you know, some sometimes when you watch that show. It's like, okay. How would I act in this situation? And obviously, I'm married. I'm never going to be in that situation. But you you sorta like, okay if I were in this situation, but then seeing everyone be twenty two twenty three or whatever I'm like, what if there was bachelor, but for old people or people. Actually have been saying this for years the bachelor should be every season to be a brand new person. Who's never been on the show before there's no preconceived notions about what they're like or what they're into or what they did with the last person. And then it should be all people who are of aid toward they might actually really wanna get here. Yeah. Yeah. Because all the the twenty two year olds just looking to be on TV. It's so crazy c unlike the first season, the couple's still together, and they have kids and stuff like that has happened since then, but they've been together for like fish. Ryan and trista. To season two. Sorry one. The season one was this guy. And he was like they were they made him seem so cold. But I remember this. I remember this vividly. They were on a horse and carriage in New York City and the person had a whip for the for the horse now. And he he said he made a they might be giants song reference where he was like minimum wage he. Awesome. And I was like this guy's in just a door. Yes. Because he's a normal guy. But they were making him out to be this like super honky. What was on the bachelor that I didn't like the other night was when when the guys like I'm actually a nerve. And and then and then the woman goes to and it's like neither have you. Suck different suck. Dick. You suck. My actually, I'm really totally at nerve. What do you mean? Eight that pay I leave through a book once. Yeah. I'm actually really look actually really let comics it's not even that they don't even like. Track. They're trying to say like, I don't even like going out to bars all every night. I sometimes just like to sit around at home. I love staying home and you're like fucking scorer phobic nerd about. It. I know I know everything about my house. We need to take a break by. He's got. Hi, paul. You know about business you you like to do business. I'm I'm a little businessman, short and stout. Here's my handle. Here's my briefcase. Can I tell you something you might not know about business because your business may way? This do I really wanted to be lectured by the likes of a lecture. I wanna help you. I love you. Okay. All right. What do you got the right? Hire can make a huge impact on your business. That's true. I mean, look to your left in my right eye feeling. It was very obvious. And I want to look to make it even more. So no, it's chef Kevin is right over here. But you know, what Scott? What's that as as we've established finding the right person? Give me hard. Let's be real cagey about who you bring into the inner circle. So listen instead of just posting on a job board and seeing what turns up, by the way, most people were check job boards. No who would ever check job board. Not maybe not this guy who thumbs in wooden. Check a job board. This guy post. Instead, here's what you do post your job to a place where people go every day to make connections grow in their career. And discover a job opportunities. I swear you have to be talking about Lincoln. I am. Yeah. Goldstar head of the class future. So bright, I gotta wear sheets linked and most linked to members they haven't recently visited the top job boards. But in not but nine out of ten of these people nine out of ten members are open to new opportunities. Now seventy percent of the US work. God, Scott, I hope he make this ad seventy percent of the US workforce Virk force. Seventy percent of verticals seventy percent of the US workforce. Did it again? He did did this seventy percent of the US workforce is on Lincoln seventy percent of anyone who is who is working exactly on Lincoln. And the this is the best way to get your job opportunity in front of people who are qualified for your role, and they are ready for something new. It's the best way to find the right person who will help you grow your business. And that is why a new hire is made every ten seconds using Lincoln. That's an astonishing. How many how many ten second periods are in a day? That's like there's gonna be over sixty minutes. And then it's got about forty Scott. Okay. It's probably over forty. Thank you Jesus. Hurry. Hurry. Hurry. Hurry. Put that down. Hurry. Hurry to Lincoln dot com. Hurry to link dot com slash three them get to this website as fast as you can. And you get throw your phone away. Get over there. Get divorced that you get fifty dollars off your first job post that is linked in dot com slash three DM and get fifty dollars off your first job post, Lincoln dot com slash three them. Terms and conditions apply. Ding-dong I'm hearing some wedding bells out there, if you're out there listening to this podcast, and you've been dating someone for a while, and you want to propose to them or maybe you're hoping that your partner will propose to you. Or maybe you wanted to decide together they want to get married, and you already want to pick out your own ring. And do it that way brilliant earth is the global leader and ethically sourced, fine, jewelry, and the destination for creating your own customer engagement ring, simply go to brilliant earth dot com and pick from a variety of ethically sourced, diamonds, gemstones metal types, and settings brilliant earth master jewellers bringing to life icon designs with exceptional craftsmanship. 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No, it was a TV. Is it a car? Too. Good name for a car. It's not bad really named cars after the they seem to name them after animals or nonsense. Like Acura, or whatever, you know, what in Japan? I I noticed that. I'm sorry. Japan. I'm very obsessive Japan. But one thing I loved was that the car is a lot of cars had names like Carol the design we like Errol, it was like I would take picture because there was like they're crazy. It'd be like the Jane or like, it would just be someone's name Volkswagen made a car called the thing. I remember the area bringing that in the seventies. It was a cool looking. It was just sort of shorten station wagon kind of and it was it was like, a moosh Nick station wagon. It was like too much nuts. You think? Okay. Do you think you could drive like you would? Yes. Hold on horse. I passed. You drive an SUV. I have driven an SUV. As rental cars. But I don't think I would want to do it being sort of taller than the car that's taller, and I really liked that I've been thinking about getting a bigger car bigger. Bigger bigger than tall, really tall. Everywhere. Do you hate like car unnecessarily, huge like a Hummer if you were to pull up to of LA here in LA in a Mack truck park it for you know, with a trailer. But just the. Yes. Like like over the top style. I could see it would they would they say we're not going to work at thing. They would say we're not gonna gonna say. Licensed to kill. This is to kill by. It was coming my mother. What if you could buy a license to kill your mother wouldn't do it? How I bought a license to kill my mother guys my mom's dead. Yeah. Good. I'm glad to know. Parents or yourself to be. Left. No parents no service. Do you consider your took my shirt? Do you consider yourself to be an orphan? Or is that something where you can only be an orphan till you're eighteen. Oh, yeah. Orphan means you're not an orphan as an adult joke tonight. Like when when adults say, I'm an orphan. Sincerely, who says people say that all the time. Well, parents are. Yes. But are they talking about it of like they were in orphan since they can't win. Like their other parent dies then. And then they're like she'd be like something when you're when you're eighteen you can buy cigarettes. You can read a playboy. But you have to stop saying, you're lady bird. I just don't like that. But I mean, also, do whatever you want. I take it back. You know, if anyone is out there, and they're like, that's how I cope. I've never felt that you were judgmental person till right now. That's so nice. Let me. We'll talk to you about this. Okay. I watched the movie call me by your name. I wanna see that. Name and in the. Long hair? In the movie. There's you know, it's about a love affair, and it's very. There's a w sexy, and it's it's a really it's a really lovely beautiful movie. And well acted the the love affairs between a seventeen year old boy and a twenty four year old young, man. Yeah. And I didn't realize that before I started watching that they were there was an age difference. And it was really difficult because Armie hammer plays the twenty four year old and he's older than twenty and he's older than twenty four. But he's also thirties. He's thirty one. Okay. But he's also he's gigantic. He's like a big person and cut out a marble. Yeah. He's like a code of a slam them older than him. Zona feel Hemmer's younger than you. But I I remember I remember I had that about playboy playmates once. I remember like in my twenties. They were all they were like, well, you know, like. Like when I was in when I was in junior high or high school, and it was like a playwright, they're all like these. They're like as old as your mother, and then then very similar to real world. In my twenty s I was like these are all eight. When you're young age is like everything's the same. Like, someone is twenty two is the same as someone who's thirty five to interrupt Paul. But he, but here's the thing while I was watching this because I'm so far away from both of those ages. I was like, wow. This is we like is that I was trying to remember is this. Okay, right. Not mean has dealt weird at that time because I'm looking at it from this from the point of view of like, oh that twenty four year old is taking advantage of that seventeen year old. Yeah. I and so I totally forgot when I was seventeen I had a twenty four year old girlfriend. Why I completely forgot this weird lead up to a BRAC? Well, no because looking at it from this. I'm looking at it from the standpoint of like, oh, no he shouldn't be doing this with the kid. Right. And I completely forgot. I never never. I never looked at it from the standpoint of the younger person. Right. No. Yes. I understand that. Because when I was forty two I had a seventeen year old girlfriend, and I felt like. You know, this actually happened on terrace house. They're all terrorists. Yes. Okay. I don't wanna watch. It was a conversation about someone dating a girl who's eleven years younger than him. And the girl keeps question yet. She's like seventeen eighteen and everyone else has gone like it's fine. As long as you think it's fine or whatever. And I was thinking about credo that I like to live by. As long as I think it's fucking. I was thinking about myself at that time though. And it was like to know what I know now versus what I know knew then and like the I I had a couple sort of pseudo relationships relationships with older than me. But it's like, I don't I look at that now, and I'm like that's weird of them. That's exactly think plan. Hang out with you. Now think yours is weird. I guess I don't because I can't I can't separate my experience. Which was that? Even though I was like a, you know, very immature. I was I was mature in certain ways where I never thought of her as being immature like down on my level. Of course, I thought of myself as a where she works, you know, and it was when we were together free year, you know, we like moved in together and everything. Were you in? We're in school. I was in the process of dropping out of school. And I know must have been after I dropped out of this process. Drop out. I dropped out after a semester of college. Yeah. I just wait. You were in college at seventeen is that? Yeah. Because I was my birthday September. So I graduated at seventeen and then I guess going into eighteen I was okay. So you're almost eighteen and I I had gotten a job on south street in Philadelphia downtown, and I was walking on the street. Just yesterday the day with a with a friend of mine who was similarly dropping out of college street date. And I saw this. Lack? Wonderful place of having forgotten that that existed. I'll never forget it. So this this girl was walking towards us. And then I was struck by her. She's very busy. Ooh. You're struck by a. With a pan me with the pants your ridiculous, Lauren. You guessed. So she walked into the store, and I said to my friend. Let's go into that store. And so I I I've never I don't think I've done this before repaying. It's working. I just started talking to her and she was really funny. And and so I think I don't remember I so I went to my job. And then I think I would what was your job at the time. I was wearing hats in the belfry. Right. You're very famous standup. Exactly go check out your album laboring under delusion. I have heard about this. You've heard about. Yes. By watching your stuff king. The famous king hat famous king happy. That's right. And so I would I would stop it in the store, and then she would stop at my store. And then we went on a date. But it was like, I never I never I think it's the when did you all the time? Did did she ever think you were older? And did you have to say, oh, by the way, I'm only seventeen almost eighteen why? Eighteen we must have with you. Today you, but I don't care if two four. Okay. Can I talk to you for a second? This song love the melody you like it love it. Okay. I like the general idea of where wait until you. Hear the next book receives sorry. I'm late. Foodie and let me slapped. Okay. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I've enjoyed personal go to do this. Goodbye. Dilly, dilly. So wait, so. The competition. But I don't remember it. It was obviously an issue because he kept dating. Yeah. Interesting. Do you think that she just like your personality or she she had a thing for the young ins or was it just mustache? No. I did not interesting. I did not. Was it a period of time in your stand up career without a moustache? Oh, that's very true. Yes. So so true. I don't think I've ever dated anyone with a mustache with a moustache. So I don't know no one with a wide gap. I accept. With perfect gaps except for cool. Oh, how what's your different? You really made up for it there because real may December. Just what is it? Fifteen hundred. Yeah. I like went on some dates with someone who was Pete whole nine or ten years older than me. But yeah, it was Pete Holmes. Gimme we'll. Was there a teacher that had an affair at your school students? You'll be talking about. You'll be talking about the person who is in the play. Wait. But there was another. I forgot there was another English language teacher. Who like oh my God. There was another one. There were there were three to the teachers look alike, by the way, they looked. Was were they were friends, and they were like this guy style. And so they looked like or what it was. That's what it was. Great. Or do you just mean physically like they like genetically they physically they were both shortish guys with the same haircut and mustache and there were both. They were both a talent. So Sarah, Tori, Lee as well as genetic. Well, all the teachers can address exactly the same because he was a Calix. They all wore like, you know, dress shirts and ties and slept. Right. We're right. Yeah. Our school you could wear whatever. What about the teachers? What would that you guys? That's why I mean, the teachers like I remember our English teacher came wearing a bikini ones, which was big tall. That didn't see the big talk. We really. Yeah. She was teacher. I've talked about this. Wait what show? That's fucking weird. Yeah. Mary Kay something. We didn't. I then tell the story probably I'm assuming of my hot gym teacher who go tell us. She was young. I know I knew her she was probably like twenty four maybe younger so could've dated one of us. Really? But then like she would be very flirtatious. And then one of the guys in my class slapped her on this one day, and then he got in big trouble. But it was like this huge turning point of like it can't go that far. Right flirt. But then she would flirt I was enough that he thought it was okay to do that. I mean, actually think was like it was happening. Like, we all witnessed it happening. And then she also I learned a very big lesson from her which is always wear a seatbelt and cabs because she was an account, and it was a sudden stop and her face went into the into the plastic and she busted. Yes. Forever. Hold black, and she was really pretty in her Wolfe's Cup. I mean, I'm sure it healed fine. But it was crazy. Yeah. Cab or car backseat. I think of that. And I'm like going to be that person. Who's like too late? Did you? Did you ever have the driving around in a pickup truck in the back of a pickup? No, we didn't. We would do that. In church groups, sometimes down the freeway here in California. I remember it was a big thing where you'd be like, oh, can I sit in the one and do that? Now. So I can't even so scary you'd feel so moored. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what happened in one of those teachers have an affair? One of the teachers had an affair. And I think he got fired. Fired one. But. Hey, the they they brought me down to this high school. Just so I could save Philadelphia hired me. Who does a better Trump? You're here. Here's Donald Trump. Trump helped me I'm. Doesn't going through a door. Any do like a like a giant door garage fucking picture of him from New Year's Eve in the tuxedo? Where he's just like he looks like a wail mouth open and this guy really funny guy on Twitter. Patrick monahan. Just. Poses a picture of the road. It is so perfect. So sad like about all the politics. I just didn't like at a point where I'm I wanted to stop. It's it's hugely demoralizing like I was I was starting out this the other day him Donald Trump saying I'm I'm going to give out my awards for. No, or you do an idiot. It's just so sad. Anyway, I like him. I think he's funny. Okay. Good. We need someone speaking. I think he's looking to Larry Larry you guys. He bothers you. So give me wrong. I love him. You guys can't stop talking about. Because he's doing something, right? So wait. So but another of the teacher he ran off with the student. It was a girl that I went to this rates school was what I was gonna say about you and the twenty four year old there seems to be such a wide swath of maturity, but that movie it didn't bother me. Call me by your name because I don't think movies have a responsibility to do the morally right thing. I think it's like this. This is the Bill that happens. It's a story. No. I never felt like the movie was at fault abras more like I know how to judge their release. Yes. It was thing. Well, because it was always this part of it. You know, what I mean is is the age difference significant? And is it part of the story in new way? It is you know, it's like, but it's it's more about you know, this kid's. Experience. And this this wonderful thing that happens. It's like that's romantic, and it's sad. And it's frustrating. And it's you know, it's every. Glide. But but but I guess what? I mean is that there's such I've never quite understood that about the lake teachers falling in love with students because or at least until you get to college. Because it doesn't seem like if you're under eighteen well, it's also what's so crazy about it is it's the one thing you absolutely are not supporting. This your one job you have to one job. Teach them. I think about that sometimes relationships not just. Who cares? If you just don't. But I think about relationships I had in high school or whatever, you know, like. When I was seventeen I was dating a sixteen year old. And it's like, it's you. In now days, I go is that weird though. Like, I think, but when you're a kid like in you're just it's whoever is sort of at the same level as you think it's not like if I were to see a if I would have sought thirty year old. I'd be like you're too old for well. It's complicated. Anything because when you see somebody in a relationship like that in the act like that's fine. Whatever it's weird because for me now, I think that's a child like I'm thirty two ground a high school. I'm like, you're a little kid that was my thing somebody being into that like dating you on a peer level is confusing to me another because I'm older than that. Even and I need to know, I'm thirty five years old guy. Twenty nine. Dilly, dilly, dilly. Whatever you want. The Jack Benny lying about your age. When I look at somebody who's twenty four. I I see that as so young. Yeah. So it's it was weird like to experience this movie where all of us, but it's so much of it. I think was about the casting because it looks like such a he looks like a middle aged man, great looking mail. He said he was older. He was older than me like for less ten years. I'm surprised that way. No way. I said next time on a plane across him. He's very good. Look these breath-taking did you join the mile high close. I did. I messed rated in the bed. I probably would do across from. Do you think is going to shoot the lone ranger career going out, New Mexico? Was he wearing the mask? Wait was it back then? Yeah, we're only going to New Mexico where the mask, yes. On his house. Daily daily. Let's take a break. We'll be right back. You is transforming into something escape. Who've is coming to how culet precious ears with spooky spooky spoon. Let's see how how to sew service at hound hound. It's haunt once. Yeah. It is hunt. Yeah. Okay. This week you is transforming into something. You is coming to hound your precious used was split up here. Wolf folk. Let's let's. This week in you is transforming into soap things. Is coming to your precious us at how is it? Chad have said that. Are you? Sure, I'm re-. I'm would one hundred percent sure. What are you do the first part? Okay. I'll do the noises. All right. Oh, okay. That's the first part. Okay. No. I mean, you do the you'll okay, go ahead. Uh-huh. All right. Viz rents forming into something scary. Move is coming to hound you appreciate. Ooh. Key episodes and head raising specialty on old you'll say shows Pollock anti. Mynah bird. You don't think you're scary? Guess imitate human speech? Now that is. I mean, if you would never heard of one before food polls. Those AB Nicholson breakdown one of the most influ Nicholson. On unschooled policier, naming Nicholson breakdown one of the most influential horror films of all times psycho psycho here an interview with hall, rower master and director of fright night. Tom hall, and he's not savage on Gilbert Godfrey. It's amazing colossal. Goes on who charted or it should be boo. Charted Howard Kremer guest. Stevenson countdown to top Halloween songs and movie off book is serving up a Halloween musical spectaculars. Just to some of what's happening over there. Nothing on comedy, bang bang. Don't miss your favorite fear. Wolf shows this week on Stitcher apple podcasts or wherever you listen. Spontaneous. Asian remains on scary for you. Welcome back. We're back. We're back blowback we're on the show where one of us brings something for the other to the feature the feature. Yes. So it's my turn today feature. And I have this game at home that I really like called hypotheticals. Have I told you about this birth? It's a cluster man gain. Oh, yes. And it's these hypothetical questions that are extreme today. Right. Fight club the Chapelle hook, but he wrote sex drugs and cocoa puffs. Okay. Well, here's one of his questions. It's a fun game. Okay. Can you just answer it? So you just answer it. However, I want and we'll just talk about the question. Okay. You are offered a brain pill. If you swallow this pill, you'll become ten percent more intelligent than you. Currently are you'll be more adept at reading comprehension logic and critical thinking, however to all other people, you know, and to all future people, you meet you will seem twenty percent less. Intelligent, in other words, he will immediately become smarter. But the rest of the world will perceive you as dumber. And there is no way you can ever alter the universality of that. Perception do you take this pill? I think people think I'm dumb already. I don't think. Iran, ran it. Yeah. Think you're done. I don't I seriously feel like people mispronouncing were like, look, you know, what I do think about this. Sometimes I remember, George W Bush, you know, how he would have a lot of sort of brain farts on TV things wrong, or whatever. And I I was making fun of that once in my dad said don't coddle him. No, you said. He said will you try talking that much and you'll have those kind of things to and then I was like, okay, whatever. But then being having podcasts. It's like, I'm constantly saying stupid shit. Yes. So I have come to sort of empathize with that. But that's also a hold on a second dumb. Bring this soci- your brain. But it's all, but that's there's a difference between that kind of talking and bullshitting on a podcast. You know what I mean? Messing up syntax of words and sentences. But I feel like yeah. And also, I won't remember I've said something incorrectly. And then I'll listen back to show and say I have done that. Oh, wow. I totally got that on my God. Wait, I was doing this. I was recording an ad at home, and I home alone. No, mike. Was there my boyfriend, and I was recording the ad. I was just fast. And I was like, and you can find the link to that in my Instagram bio, and that's okay. Thanks bye. And then he was like it's so funny that it's so cool that you can like do a character voice like fix something when you mess up, and I was like why. And he's like what isn't egg. Serious. He was like, you don't have to redo it made it make sense. And I was like why? And he was like you said Twitter bio, and I said, no, I said Instagram, and he was like no you didn't like then we'll do it back. And I said you can get that in my Twitter bio set that interest. It was Craig up. So w talk about all the time. It was so weird though to here. I thought I said something I was so certain and then just to hear it back. And that's not what I said that was it was not even a word. I was you know, the show Gavin and Stacey yet to watch that. But. To watch that. But I love it. But I I was talking about it somewhere on on microphone, and I kept calling it Ned and Stacey. Which was that? Tom. But I didn't know that. And I said it several times the incorrect way. And and people started talking to me about it, assuming that I knew that I had said the wrong thing. And I didn't I'm like, what is what are these people are saying to me, I had no idea. So weird. I said the other day someone wondered what song was playing and I said, yeah. And it was the song. Can't stop the feeling. And I said, oh, it's can't fight the feeling and she said, yes, that's it. And then all I could think about was I said the wrong title to this stranger. She thinks I'm an idiot now because I said, very confidently its can't fight the feeling and I'm going to remember this day for the rest of my life. You did. So why she I think that she didn't notice she she registered it as the correct thing or higher? She had Harley. No. And then I know that it's the kind of thing that I will obsess about. Yeah. Well, that's weird. I think I might like to take the pill just to. To think about the question because I feel like it'd be so great to be able to use. I don't know it'd be smarter that pill. I feel like. I'm assuming if I take the pill that gives me more intelligence. It will also give him the ability to reason out enough to not be upset that every stupid because it would I feel like it. Frustrating, don't care about my own personal knowledge. I care about what? For me. It's like it's I've realized it would be less because I'm a middle child. It would be less about what people thought about me. But that they wouldn't listen to me. It would be frustrating that I would be perceived as someone whose opinion or input. Did not mad. No, I'm actually smarter than you. You wouldn't be able to use your intelligence to help anyone does. What do I do with that intelligence? If everyone assumes, I'm an idiot. You could you write letters and people would think they're smart like a progress report or like just even a letter like he's good on paper. Yeah. I don't know. Hey, Nana Asli if you could go. This literal, some good ideas that can't read it. But you don't understand maybe you can make two if you sometimes do you ever have that fantasy of like, it'd be good to go back to college or go back to high school or learn more, you know, like what if they made high school? Learn more. Fuck. I thought it was to not be. Social terrified all the time. When I think of it now crush. Just having fun doing well have the opposite. Where it's like all I did was have fun. And I didn't learn a single thing. Like now with having fun. I guess my social life. But I I hated living in the dorm. I got so much about like a lot of that stuff. And so I would enjoy not dormitory. Did I say dormitory? No, we're back to square one. Question. Yeah. Sure. What we gonna say? I just wondered if like they made high school for people like us. Whereas like, we had to go for people our age you had to go and you had to do it for years. It'd be fun. God. No, no, let's and your careers waiting for you when I didn't like being a student. Yeah. I think I'd like it. Okay. Yes. I haven't read it. Think of someone who is your friend. Do not do not let your best friend. Sure that person is someone you would classify as considerably more than an acquaintance. Okay. This friend is going to be attacked by a grizzly bear. Okay. Now, this person will survive. This person will survive this Barrett tack that is guaranteed. There is a one hundred percent chance that your friend will live. However, the extent of his injuries is unknown. He might receive nothing, but a few superficial scratches, but he might also lose a limb or multiple EMS. He might recover completely in twenty four hours with nothing. But a great story or he might spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair. Somehow you have the ability to stop this attack from happening. You can magically save your friend from the bear. But his salvation will come in a peculiar price. If you choose to stop the bear will always rain for the rest of your life. Wherever you go. It will be raining sometimes it will pour and sometimes it will drizzle, but it will never not be raining with a friend know that we've saved it won't own them. But it won't ran. Oh, we'll. Oh, we'll. But it won't rain over the totality of the earth. Nor will the hydraulic cycle be disrupted. Okay. These storm clouds will be isolated and they will focus entirely on your specific whereabouts. You will never see the sun. Again. Do you stop the bear? And accept a lifetime of rain. Does the friend know the do because you're stopping the bear? You're stopping the bear. Let's say they do do this magically. So maybe your friend doesn't know. I don't know if they didn't know what you know, you would just let. But if they knew, and I was like guess what it's going to rain forever on me because I did that. And and the had to they had to thank me for it man, you'd love that. No. I didn't know I was thinking about my friend. I was like, oh, I want a bird attacking. I heard a crazy story about a bear attack recently. I wish I remember the details, but I was telling cool up about it about like. Woman attacked by a bear in the home. And it was a crazy story. But I don't remember the details, but it's just that's horrifying. The idea that they could maybe just get away with nothing. You don't know what's going to happen when someone's attacked by? Yeah. I would not want to take that chance. I would I would save the friend me too. I don't really have. I'd like the rain sort of rain. Thanks. But yeah, when I bought I do feel like I. More time for another one. Okay. Let me just scroll through these. The Saturday Night Live music star playing. In letting us know it's at a time. What was that that doesn't play to let you know? What's out time? It plays at the end of the show, but it's not like play like award show where you get played on this and music. Okay. Here we are in the middle of suddenly. I guess we a wrap this up. Good every. Earth is about to be struck by a mammoth meteor book, though, no one knows exactly what will happen. Most. Scientists assume life on earth will be totally altered and potentially eliminated. Everyone on the planet is freaking out. Suddenly you receive a bizarre Email. The government demands that you must fly to Washington DC immediately by order of the president the Email message and the Email message and. Includes your plane ticket. Well, first class, I'm in. Okay. Once you. I don't care. I'm in once you arrive at Dulles airport. Dole is I want to fly into Reagan military, police confiscate your cell phone and wordlessly transport you to a secret hangar that houses ten massive space. Shuttles you are escorted. He's still hanging around inspiring. We're escorted onto one of the ship. How do you spell it? Like clothes hanger like ER? Yeah. Not yours gardens. One of the ship's crew. There are twenty four equally. Confused people waiting on board. You recognize a few of these people instantly. Bill Gates, the musician prince and Oprah Winfrey fringes Barron's when the individuals you've prince's back. I'm in. I don't care what it is not a box of prince spaghetti. When the individuals you don't recognize begin talking and interacting with one another. It becomes clear that all of them are brilliant. Scientists consequential artists or extremely wealthy political figures long. Ships captured informs all of the passengers the space shuttle, we'll be leaving earth in two hours. He does not say where it's going, although he doesn't SIS that anyone who wants to remain on earth is free to stay behind. You are ninety percent certain you've been selected for this trip by mistake. Do remain on ARD. And if you do they expect people to put it. If you do how will you explain your presence to the other twenty four passengers you have no idea if admitting your saying. From travelling. Yeah. You guys have I've seen cable on belong here. Oprah was on the thing. I'd be on the thing. IBM thing. I love her. She's been only celebrity. I really wanna meet I told you. She was in Springsteen on Broadway with us. Right. No. You know, she just was sitting. Oh, that's good. I thought I'd be around like a sweet like a sweet life was acting. Area. But I don't have any of my loved ones who are the women. They're brilliant. Scientists are not interested. Names her male. Celebrities. Let's who are the Oprah Oprah you think of her as a man complement. She's so successful. She praise high praise is there the Queen of the cock blockers. I mean, I guess I'd probably say I am I supposed to be here. I would admit it asking around for sure. It'd be like why am I chosen? I. Yeah. I think that's how you would find out as you would ask someone. Why was I selected for this? And then see if they know. You would do that. And not just go fucking sweet deal. You have the option of just not going. It's time for them. But he no earth. I don't even know that I go into the limo or I'm assuming it's a limo. I don't know if you've ever mentioned a limo. But now there's a nice stretch living today on first class. I don't know that I get into it. If I can't bring, you know. Yeah. Paul over here. If I can't bring cool up. I'm like with the earth is going to. And I'm not gonna leave her what that's exactly it is that if in this scenario, if it's just like, I don't know. It's it's this is presuming university of shit about. You're selling celebrity you're single in your day. Yeah. I guess that must be democrat single posture probably talk to Oprah for a little bit. And then stay behind last second. Yeah. I wanna go, but you're going to die. The wheel zone, but don't you? But there's twenty four other people don't you think the will to live is is. I don't know if like everyone I loved was like we're all going to die. There also is denial where yes, we all know the meteors going to strike, but the human brain kind of goes like, but what if it misses? Yeah. What if it's not then you stay behind? Nobody's going to like Donald Trump president. I would I would say behind with my lovely wife. Yeah. If you could go with your wife, or if she said go, that's what she said. That's something we stadium. Dilly leave. You do. Daily go off with you. Now now, delete delete. Yeah. I would not I would stay if they're in Huck if I don't get a plus one then forget it. Yeah. You gotta get a plus one plus one it'd be so scared to interact. The dead. Prince someone's going on I talked prints for a do you think? Do you think Chris would you be nervous to meet Bill gay? Now. I'd be like, hey, who's a famous person you just wouldn't give a shit about shit about Bill. We're not gonna have these nice to meet you. Pretty cool. Great awesome. We used to be Popeye on the book cool who's appraiser top that? It would not be like, it would not be impressive to me who what a president president because I impressive. I mean, Trump, obviously. But like before that, I don't think I'd really care about most of them because I don't really I honestly, I just don't care that much. I feel like for me that I feel like it would be a big deal for me to meet Jimmy Carter. But of Gerald Ford was still alive. It wouldn't be met Obama. I would like cry that would be he would be an impressive. Yeah. Person to meet. But it's the only one end Clinton and Hillary Clinton, I've you excited to meet them, even like, George Bush, George Bush. I feel like it would be crazy like oh my God. I'm meeting somebody who you think something of that. Yeah. President when I was alive. I would be a feel somewhat intimidated or excited about meeting except for Jordan. Him. Who cares? His dying. Do you think Princeton this situation say he's still alive? That's another qualifier. Do you think prints? There's only twenty four people in we're going off to another planet. Do you think he liked drops the act and hang on a regular guy because someone said that about Michael Jackson where they were saying like, oh, no. When no one is when the cameras aren't around. He's traps. This thing is just like, hey, I'm Michael Howard. What? Gilbert Godfrey why? Michael Jackson said that. But pretty Willie think he do you believe that someone said that or no? So they were just like, hey, what's up? But that's about it. Do you think you really have those kids? I think he jerked off into something. Yeah. I off. Is it a woman's gap? I waited on him once when I worked at tower video what? Hey came in with an entourage of like security entourage. Turtle. Aglow. It wasn't. Alabama's care. Only they invited me. Maybe they meant to invite awkward. Wait. What did they all Kerman? Should we thought we invited them? You're going to get that one. I did get it. When I was a kid, and I would get really upset, and then as an adult, I'm like, they're calling me a superhero. Doesn't even exist. We talking about wait. So you worked at tower video which is like Tower Records kind of. Yes. Video Tower Records, and it was just a video store, and I think it's a Bank now. But it was it was empty for a long time after a closed, which always made me happy. I dated I dated someone who lived by it once data's in quotes. But I remember I went over. I went over to or governor guy. I went over to her apartment and just it was like, hey, let's get together. What are we gonna do? I don't know just come over. And so I went over, and it was like, well, what do you want to do you want to? Let's go rent a video at at tower video. So we walked the, you know, I don't know two blocks to tower video rented little big man is absolutely. Yeah. Is Dustin Hoffman. No, no, big, man. Wait. Yes. Little big man is Dustin Hoffman. Okay. Yes. Rented that took it back to what is it. Big, man. Little man Tate one with foster with the one that that Marlon wayans did. Oh, baby. White chicks. The baby by the way, put a pin in your story. Because I'm sorry. I put a pin in yours. That's all right. I saw a little bit of white chicks. I'd never seen it. And I saw a little bit of it on TV the other day, and I didn't realize that in this in the world of this movie. The wayans brothers are disguised as specific white chicks that when everyone else looks at them, they see these women, what's like Paris Hilton. Yes, there impersonating these two who went into. Yes. In the world of see their POV. We see the actresses playing just note your characters in the movie, you're like, hi, Lisa Tanya, whatever their names are they look so much like flawlessly. These show insane. And then you see them at the end of the women that there impersonating, I didn't realize the. What if you got free? Like, yeah. Okay. You get this part. And you realize you're playing someone who looks like Marlon wayans with a white hound face people look at Marlin in this get up. They see you. Wait. Okay. So what was your story about our sorry? But I want to finish my story. We we go back to Twitter. Twitter. We put the video when we walked back to the we put the video on in sixty seconds. Because he's never fucking. There's no hotter movie. A little big man starting to go. He was so crews minute of that movie pretense of like picking a movie, and we and we both were like, oh, this is interesting. And we were like have you ever seen that literally you actually just hooked up? That is all you do at that point where it's like, let's watch a movie. That's the Netflix thing is right where people. Chill and early put on anything. I was just like why did we have this half hour thing where we were like deciding and I've seen this on the dance of courtship anyway. Okay. Wait. So you sound called Jackson. I saw Michael Jackson. Although now that I think about it. It could have been anyone because he was wearing a surgical mask and the mirrored sunglasses and a hat. It's been any the tendrils of hair, creeping out and. That's an inside joke between the Jewish. Back to you. But he came in with like three or four security people who established kind of a perimeter around him as you browse through laser discs. Break that every single word if you were to break that perimeter you're a customer at the store, you have rights to go wherever you want. I think I think they were letting people in and around, but I think the idea was they were being watchful. They were they were to say something to day would maybe say life. He was trouble Lister, then they would say, and he would say. Yes, I tell you. So so Michael Jackson. What did you do? Then did he stuff and he left? What are you buy? Do you? Remember a bunch of laser discs. Cool. That would that would be a thing that you would see a lot is like wealthy celebrities would come in and just buy like a crate of stuff. Yeah. Well, John in Colin Hanks, Colin Hanks his documentary about tower across all of us. He would go every single Tuesday and just by every single record. That would come out by stacks of like, you would buy multiple copies of them. He said just because he loved going probably like telling them. Yeah. That's one in Melton. John was probably selling them out of his car for like a markup. Yes. Exactly. Gosh, we have to go. But before we go we do have one thing to say it everyone in that is daily. Hey, delete, dilly. Thank you. Bye. 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