Rob Haze has never seen Thelma and Louise

Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Hey this is dan done. The host of what we're drinking with dan done on the latest episode we can get deep dive into america's native spirit urban with my very special guest tiffany thesis that's right got the throwback whiskey we kelly hausky and it turned out to be everything could have possibly dreamed of and more. Did you see some of my alcohol is actually getting a little low and you do have some bottles at our guest host. Let down into my dressing room. I don't let a lot of men in my dressing. This is where i do all my podcasts dressing all completely innocent. I swear also in the latest episode details on how to win a pair of passes to the bourbon beyond mm festival in kentucky next month featuring foo fighters robert plant hall notes joan jett john fogerty and lots of other old people plus. I'll be there with tiffany tiffany thiessen for real. Come drink with us so check out what we're drinking. I'm dan dan reminding you. That drinking can cause memory loss or even worse memory loss. Hey this is dave ross host of the podcast suicide buddies unstuck auburn's audio and my first ever stand up album comes out this friday august twenty third on a special thing records and little dipper if you'd like to buy it or stream it go to sex dot guns beer and i mean that that is a real a website i own and made to sell my album. You can get a physical copy of flip book that comes with a digital album or you can buy digitally or their links to use streaming sites like apple music and spotify on there as well. I can't tell you enough how proud i am of this record. I think you'll like it. I hope you check it out. Thank you so much. Enjoy the rest of your day starting in a world where every conversation is about what movie or tv show you just see. This is never seen it comedians. Rewriting famous movies visa t._v. shows. They've never seen hello everybody. Today's episode is with the very funny rob hayes. Rob bob has never seen thelma and louise is a great script. The games are are bizarre. <hes> we're joined by c. J. tola donna as well and we have a really good time. It's it's fun. Rob is super funny. He has new album that is out now called haza pedia. It is out everywhere. You can listen to it. <hes> you know spotify firefighters rivulets albums haza pedia rob stand up is so so funny he's also a writer and is featured sometimes on sherman showcase on i._f._c. and so you can check out it has worked there check out his album haza pedia and robin c._j. Along with michael joyce who you know for the show ronna stand up showcase in los angeles every single single thursday at kuzina filipino eagle rock so if you wanna see some live stand up you can check them out thursday's their checkout rob's album haza pedia sherman showcase see it's so fun great episode and and for free all the listeners some stuff is transitioning here. We're no longer going to be on stitcher premium right. We're we're going to leaving so so. We're going to be doing a lot more stuff on our patriot page. We're going to be able to put up. Some audio episodes bonus stuff. They're all that sort of stuff. It's only three dollars. A month. Igt is patriot patriae dot com slash never seen it and and you're going to start being able to get way more bonus stuff there. <hes> can i say ad free episodes will check on it trying to get some get the episodes without commercials without commercials. You know the thing ever want <hes> so if you want to check out an ad free episodes of the podcast bonus games videos does audio. We're going to be able to do a lot more stuff since we're no longer on stitcher. If you wanna support the show <hes> you can do that for three dollars. A month that patriot dot com slash never seen it. I can get a lot more bonus stuff up there. I'm going home to visit my family soon so gonna try and do some fun stuff with my dad and my seven month old nephew who have seen about the same amount of movies in their lives <hes> and then if you wanna <hes> seamy tilson jokes and stuff. If you're in denver i'm going to be at the high plains comedy festival in september <hes> for few days super fun and if you're in los angeles. It's a little ways out. I'm going to be recording an album on december seventh. See you can come see me record a standalone antebellum december seventh at good heroin which is in echo park in los angeles hosted by the wonderful dave ross and matt engebretsen but i'm gonna be recorded album very exciting being and it will be outside which truly will be a nightmarishly bad decision i making for a comedy album to record it outside echo park but here we art and it's free december seventh you market down to saturday. You can come watch me record my comedy album <hes> then and here's the episode with rob. Hey everybody this is never seen it. I'm your host kyle. Is this the podcast dr comedians rewrite famous movies and t._v. Shows they've never seen before today. Having never seen thelma and louise we have rob hayes was going on nothing <hes> <hes> and then this is the one of the ones. I don't know if i've seen if we said that a little bit earlier okay <hes>. Have you seen join c. J. told the donohoe's here with us. Sorry i didn't mean to like what about if i literally you. Don't say a word the whole time. I just didn't like val kilmer shirt and that's so i'm not wearing a val kilmer shirt but it's a draw in an illustrated a <hes> picture of muhammad ali my shirt under under button out yeah. He's i guess you shouldn't really i just see half of a face and i'm like i know those lists. I had to san like val kilmer. I yeah what if you wanna just shake the number two never seen this never seen muhammad ali or never seen that whole shirt allie entire families my entire families from louisville kentucky where they shot topgun parents met and my dad grew up muhammad. Ali boulevard changed val kilmer picture. C._j.'s ages like draw muhammad ali from memory and robs like okay. I'll start with the fighter jet. He's playing volleyball it. It does not look like falcons drawing. I mean yeah i get it. I get it out to art yeah the general idea but it also says all lira under his face but you don't wanna make assumptions now so low of <unk> muhammad ali rest in peace such val. Oh camera where you are career. I think making the remake of top gun right or is the trailers already outs. Maybe there is a shot. That looks exactly like l. Val kilmer but is totally not because guys in shape is mohammed ali mohammed ali. I don't know what they're <hes>. I nursery topgun idea but they already making a movie podcast and you've never okay all right yeah. But what is the university. Have you heard the sound check. I mean sure i've heard some of the songs from it. It's not like an originalist like john. Williams score is it. I think there is an original score but there's like the eighties hits. Both the scores good the town tune in. You know what i'm doing right. This is what song plays during volleyball. Maybe volleyball seen yes c._b._s. So changes only top forty. Okay okay they do while yeah. I'm super into the l._a. Radio station i love because none of them are specific to any time period. They'll be gets <hes> what's the one that's like nineties hip hop op ninety zip up fifty cents and then here's a song that came out last year and then they just kind of all play stuff from whatever but i like it. I think there's good radio out here. Yeah i do do like the radio ad. Did we ever listen to radio in new york when we were out there <hes> when i was on a moving truck yeah yeah. What was it like out. There committed here yeah. I mean like hot ninety seven during the day. Is it kind of builds that like new york energy rhinos like okay. They're playing into a certain person like we watch clips online. It's like good talking to you. Listen you like oh yeah. I need this to live in this unlike when flex drops those bomb like us. It's great when you're headed like you've driven from philly and you i need you know you just need that like last thirty minutes to get into one mile for the most important day in the the thank you. I'm glad all right so before we get into the script. I'm gonna give you guys a tease of guess what movie kyle's dad is describing. Having only trail never haven't heard of the movie so i'm just gonna play a few seconds from this and then we'll get back to it at the end right okay. He's talking so fast. That's it for now any early guesses. He's talking to fast. Is this movie current. We'll see i'm thinking you've got to think movies where they talk. Fast chris tucker chris tucker okay see i'm thinking social networks something there where you know <hes>. They like snappy happy with it. Yeah i must say i guess we'll play goal thing. It's way too long <hes> rob so you'd never seen thelma and louise. I've never seen seen a lotta movies a lot of movies. Let's do the list before we get it because you had to list. You said you're working on. You just saw goodwill hunting for the first time said it tomorrow boo of of course my phone <hes> to be respectful to the podcast <hes> the first time in the history the podcast someone turned off and we're going to pull that phone phone. What else do we need some 'cause we talked a little bit. It's good will hunting is a is a very famous movie. That's not a franchise but it launched the careers ears at two of the most famous dudes in the world and you just saw was morris before goodwill hunt. I think we're seeing ninety four right did they shoot uh-huh is like ninety eight. Oh wow i thought mallrats was just a documentary about making good will hunting thing met david zamora's probably why not no no. That's the thing that lingered throughout all of it was. He always had something better to do and ben. Ben affleck is just in all the kevin smith who i love kevin smith but it's like matt. Damon seems busy dame in doghmane jellison dogmas best one. I love dogma so good will hunting for c._j. You've seen good one yeah yeah yeah. What is. When did you see probably when you were younger thousands. I think i was more trying to get through all those movies in the nineties at were big that hadn't seen because it yeah you know there's a lot of movies that if you see it at the right age are better than if you see them now like oh maybe almost all of them you were getting. The stuff isn't for us anymore but i missed it. All i missed the gooney. I missed all of the late eighties early nineties like stuff. I missed. I haven't seen goonies are lost boys or neverending story. I have seen home home alone home alone. Two i have seen home alone also lost three. I did not know there was a third is is homeless. Three was in theaters do they is it how many he's macaulay culkin and just to to well. That's not i've seen those two nine looking at i've seen ferris bueller. That's probably the only john hughes movie seem pretty in pink so i haven't even heard of that. Trays automobile have seen that those ones kind of the small amount of movies. My dad likes switches. People listening to my dad has been a movie theater in space. Jam does to a movie theater. He's like no more. That soundtrack was the first c._d. I ever own the soundtrack was good and they made made another soundtrack with the v._h._s. That was even tell you everybody on that. Soundtrack holds up to this day. Wait reno who wrote the bugs. Bunny lawsuits suits who go down. That sounds like a good person. I would say historically great person. Are you okay okay okay. Let me know who wrote the bugs bunny wrap year. Come on man jay jay z. I just learned that like in the last few months. That's a crazy insane where he now the word out who would have thought when that happened. He would be more famous than bugs bunny now yet yeah the that's the thing they wanna bring space jim. These kids know to athletes. They don't know it's going to be funny these cards. They're going to be the coups that guy. Who's the guy in the helmet. Why can't i see his face. That's not sponge that will fund. I would love a crossover. Get a cartoon dora in there. She's like there's the hoop. I'm scared. I'm a little i'm alone. These kids don't know looney tunes. They know they're trying to bring back like there's like they released like ten shorts. What's the the idea yeah you have to. You have to watch it vertically on your phone holding the button down. I think it's just not for us. We're <unk> stuff isn't for us anymore that all the time people are like if you think if you're mad at the little mermaid is different now. You gotta realize it's not for you. People who are like. I owned the first i little mermaid. They're gonna try yeah that this isn't for you and you. If you're on a movie at eighty nine the this design for you to take your kid to see the little mermaid right. Nothing is for us anymore and i think this space jam tool probably be bad but space him one if you're like forty saas based. I'm on your part well unless you're my dad. You probably like that's it but i thought it was the dope shit ever. I don't know i feel like i feel like parents when they saw spatially and there was like they may really got. They got all these people do. They were for sure excited that bill murray was in the year bill murray really talking trash. The larry bird on the golf course uh-huh yeah but the thing is it opens up you forget opens up with fifteen minutes of michael jordan highlights and so as many highlights kid ear in the theater. You're watching michael jordan highlights on the big screen like already my favorite visit best seats. I've ever had to see deejays. Did they thing this. This great great has like the weird everything that happens not in looney. Tune land is so insane in space is as weird as in space jam everything they're trying to like. Put the story line with the kids finding stuff and going and getting it. It's just like come on to watch him dunk on the hot rabbit michael jordan watching jim rome. That was the thing that was what the phrase bill. Simmons is in space jam boy. I'll still be blocked on twitter. If he's in spaceships yeah i got to hear what because i asked him <hes> if he could write a whole article without bringing up madman servants servants to him you are going to be in space you can make money save two alien races without vowed him and then then you put your top three skew is still got it skips little argument will be michael jordan already this <hes> all right thelma and louise so i got the list we read. Oh yeah yeah so what are some of them. That didn't make the do. I've never seen a bronx tale. Raging bull okay cooley high <hes> philadelphia saving private ryan godfather went into two and three but threes now lists the usual such a then so funny that is such a culture thing where the i. I haven't seen the third one either but i didn't bother typing the number three. That's what everyone thinks about god. Wes sledders three canes film guard the usual sousse suspects he superfly close encounters american graffiti a few good men casino basic basic instinct a perfect murder silence of the lambs and schindler's list man. That's a hefty list. That's a great list of like that can really be someone's favourite movie that list of someone's favorite movies who's thirty seven right now seen a bunch of them. I don't think you need to see seat and see saving private brian and then i think you're alright. He is like the dark knight. Oh yeah yeah yeah. It's a really good way round did go back and superimposed. They went back to remove the world trade centers because it was <hes> people can have mentors but they superimpose the joker joker or is robert de niro to face like which one half of their face okay you're asking which one was unnecessarily shoved shoved into the movie. It's good though he does go but the action is is. Is you kind of feel like the dark knight definitely had seen there's a scene he the he oh yeah melissa mccarthy airplane which is a sequel to heat. It's like what they're doing with bill and ted yeah. What were they doing villain ten. They're making a sequel with their daughters but also with the bill and ted or whatever whatever happens their daughters come to save them or something. I don't mean can smoke weed to in two thousand nineteen breaking news <hes> dumb and lease he's. I don't know we'll talk about what we know about it. Afterwards okay c._j. Said you've seen it before a little bit ago but i've been meaning to rewatch it so this is terrible from heavy really been meaning to re- well brad pitt after seeing once upon a time. I'm like yeah. He takes off his shirt shirt. Which is like the big moment. A woman gasped and my movie yeah people go nuts in an listen. I've been listening to podcasts when they talk about they own spend twenty minutes talking about this one scene brad pitt takes his shirt off and i think this is like the first movie i think the reason they talk about that. Specific scene is because it right after is a very weirdly racially charged charged. <hes> senior who were with bruce lee is a character. Someone's like yeah but remember when he took his shirt but not the part where quentin tarantino hates beasley sleep for some reason these people. I guess they seem choi. No probably not that day. Okay yeah no but there's something about this. You gotta see rob all right now. It is crazy. He's so hot when he takes his shirt off. It's wild back o._k. Alvin lee's brad pitt with no shirt on less <hes> rob you can cast it up till till whoever you want to play. Well okay <hes> who wants to be thelma. You tell us okay all right. I'll beat them. <hes> and that's how it works. Listen all right who wants to direct you could be louise. Louise wright c._j. Could be baas. You could be a black man patsy patsy j. great and shirtless cowboy there. We go i eh maybe i don't know if i don't feel like this right if we come up with c._j. Just sent me a contestant. It can be contested all right yeah raider. They'll mail louise written by rab hayes based on cut scenes from maniacs family guy in the alternate ending of wayne's world two. They don't contact me contacting this. When i had a script deal and <hes> i was breaking the rules years writing scripts on there like hey don't write anything and of course i put my like edris because it says on final chapter edges someone found the script screens like just took a picture of incentives to me me from adam silver right now. They're leaking out yes right so right took a picture of a scripted they found because at my edges on incentives to my phone phone and i was so scared that it was like i was going to like lose the dealer something yeah but it was just some good samaritan those like other addresses on here like the inner phone number. I'll just text into them and then you know. They clearly left their screw. That's nice do they read the rest of the script. I i don't know but i was i was. I'm sorry what do i do. How much do you think they're going to work for someone for felt like the by backwards. They make all right all right all right. Let's do it exterior mountain prison present day the sunbeam stir blue sky over a mountain range fool of red mountains. Our attention is drawn towards a guardrail that has been busted through the sound of crow echoes. The heat from the sun beating on the ground makes everything blurry alone lizard walks near the the opening is stops the runaway title card domain louise exterior house a week ago the houses have matching shing odor mailboxes that look weather from years of us in the back clothes hang from a clothesline outside of a small duplex del mar a gena davis was looking woman after the vlad but before the gene walks outside and takes the clothes off a clothesline interior house moments later then will walks in and puts the close dan she plops on the couch and turns on the tv jeopardy is on final jeopardy has begun them feels around their couch looking for the phone she files according finds a phone somehow under the couch she picks up the phone interior diner moments later a visit diners crazy people are starting to get antsy and the kitchen is totally backed up the phone rings louise a waitress that resembles the lady from the details of this is the phone. Hello thelma i i know i know i'm gonna miss wheel of fortune tonight. What they're gonna give away the car tonight. Louise wax tour bus bus a big men in a short short sleeve shirt and tie think mr tuttle from saved by the bill. He hands it to full plates. Hey dude stake these the table three. I can't live like this. I quit okay. Louise don't come crawling back. Louis storms out lewis gibson her car. It's a huge pattern view blue muscle car. She looks at the time is seven thirty five. She runs a red light cars crash. Police sirens go off off louis higher races as she looks in her rear view mirror. The police pulling over the other people from the accident lewis labs. She looks at her clock is seven forty seven. She jumps out the car and barges in his house into your house. Moments later louise his walks in and goes right to the kitchen and pose a beer out of the fridge. Oh my god she is winning. She is not winning the car. There's only one envelope left a lucky idiots. You know it someone does all the work gets bankrupt. Then a moron gets all the money. The skill is in a spin and the last category is sports are s. t. l. e. is given to you now. I need three contestants and avail. The clue reads blink blink s. e. blink blink ill. She's gonna blow it <hes> k. k. f. n. y. Why life can she even do that. It's baseball wrestling with eh. Louise follow the couch laughing league of cry never be wrestling you idiot that has our s._t. L. e. in it. This even watch out no because she probably has a life thelma. What the hell does that mean. I mean this is pathetic. I had to quit my job. Just watch wheel of fortune. You quit yeah. They treated me like a servant. You are a server. I know i know but i was supposed to get off at six. They know i'll have to get home to watch my shows. I realized something today. What is that. I have a talent. I can get away with crimes like a master criminal. Yes elma. You're my best friend right. No doubt i say we leave this dumb ass town and become hardcore criminals. What about the house. What about frank frank. Don't love you this house. We can do better. The average person can't even win wheel of fortune okay. We'll promise me one thing what's that if this doesn't workout in a work louise do they including hands staring into it convenience store the next day people are waiting in line at the gas station. They started as louise car crashes outside. They'll men louise renne inside both holding guns and winger isky mass mother fuckers empty your pockets. The clerk tries to pick pick up the phone but the downtown too loud. Thelma points the gun at his chest empty cash register any y'all support the m._l._k. Okay holiday. Everyone in the story looks at a black man in the bet. I do good well. You can leave. That's okay hurry up. Can i have a bag. The clerk gives louisa plastic bag bag. Put the money in the bag now. Everyone puts it valuables in the bag. That's pretty good them in louisa rush out and get in the car. We need to go we need to we need to go back shopping. They'll it takes tape the tape player john cougar mellencamp. We don't listen to that anymore. It's the nineties them pops in the tape. A hundred amount of renting by india plays them in louise's speed off and do the handshake they pass a motel signed in the car stops. They back up and turn around exterior motel night. They'll ms counting all the money as low as louise pulls into the motel. They see a shirtless cowboy. It's brad pitt if you did pour. Hey cowboy. Where's your shirt. I don't even know what that is. I can show you then. We'll walks up to the shirtless calloway and gets real close to his face. What about frank around phrase not to mention it. Factual movie ended with mocking. What about in the whole movie. This is out in yeah. It was a marvel take on. She realizes uh-huh that the plot of the movie power is the plot of the movie like when keanu reeves in the matrix is like i know kung fu ooh uploaded crime into her crying so yeah. I didn't know that much about them louise. He's i don't either i definitely i don't know your script made me more sure. I haven't seen because i think i was listening to. This probably out goes but i do love you had the light line in the beginning alternate seen him wayne's world to think people our age. That's how we know like these the graduate we know it <music> as jokes from wayne's world yeah i think anna maniacs a simpsons are a lot of things where you go back and rewatch eighties movies. These are especially if you love the simpsons if you go rewatch hitchcock or the twilight zone and you're like oh this is aw this is this is why they have a thousand episodes. Yes 'cause they just do this. They do <hes>. I haven't is brad pitt in the movie a lot. I didn't think so. I thought he just sort of it was just a shirtless guy. Yeah ah yeah they come across them. Here's how little i knew about it before. We i googled louise to make sure that wasn't brad. Pitt's character cast me a second. We're gonna go one of them. No the we definitely needed some real who telman lease. They're real humans at at one point yeah <hes> this is based on a real story. Oh in real life. I thought you meant or the figment of someone's imagination snuggle. He's not the word real was eh figment of imagination opposite of real. I'm like were in the story when we actually real okay. Hey no no worthy. I meant like bonnie and clyde ye i dunno. I dunno does anyone else. I don't know there's no way to find out so i'm sure shoe. Ladies have done this or something like it. They'll be illegal all right great script. I think you nailed the tone yeah. Is it a comedy. Is it just sort of like one of those like easy. Rider type movies were just kind of happens. I really don't know i don't know i don't know what the stakes are. I don't know how they got into but my when i was trying to decide what to do like my girlfriend's just asking me. What what do you think this movie is about. Two women are bored and then they decided this this be criminal yeah. It'd be criminal yeah that maybe there's no way to know more harsh than that as to why they're criminals do they kill people. <hes> yeah hell yeah. Gena davis is abused by. I believe her boyfriend or husband and then she's like. I don't want to give away the whole movie movie. I wanna tell you guys what happens to watch the trailer and in the trailer. There's a lotta people on phones. There's a gena davis is on the phone. Susan sarandon's on found the boyfriends on the phone like landline landline phone landline phone. It's a lot of hay going into visit like can i use your phone. Yeah i used to try and write a game for this call. How would cell phones change change this old movie and where you just sorta talk about an old movie and how cell phones would change and they kind of ruined all movies for about fifty years. Oh yeah do you take any old movie uvi and you had a cell phone and the anything before like two thousand five and it just doesn't have the heat with cell phones is just kind of a misunderstanding they could just kind of you know we're all being able to text away from conflict resolution kevin tonight. Here kevin's not here carrying here. It's kevin tech savvy kevin textile. I'm at home they turn around and go get him but you wonder how they're going to remake it right. All it is in the beginning to gonna kill the phone phone. Somehow that's what always happens. It was at the killed. The phone departed is like a big thing is where everything happens where there's not cell phone service so real conversations could happen or the weapons have a password. Have you seen in you know a gun. Face the point being gonna yourself online to see your face in the sequel. We need an excuse to do karate all right. Let's get the guns password. I did see because there's like a big samoan hand to hand combat might so may not work all right. I'm here for that. I'm here for a compilation of excuses. His wife technology can't yes mostly all screenwriting yeah. I love it all right like when the okay so we've been doing this thing podcast for way too long called the bracket of shame and being shamed and we're trying to do is find out the movie or tv. Show people get the most shame for having not seen. We're in the quarterfinals now okay. We're gonna talk about the two quarterfinal matchups okay. This is from the television side of the bracket. So you know march madness. Stop bracket. This division. Is the what you bring up. If you meet someone from baltimore division <hes> and so we got don't who don't want to tell you who the one c._d.'s <hes> so general reaction await. I forgot the one seed actually lost in this one so we have four t._v. Shows matchups your gut reaction for what you get more shame for having not seen or someone like if i say something like i haven't seen top gun right how you guys like whoa you know whatever net amount of shaming the first matchup is mad men versus parks and rec okay if someone told you they hadn't seen both both of those. Where's your reaction. Here's the thing i've never seen madman so i can't really i can't really shame someone for nazi amendment and the only thing i know about man men's what pete holmes has told me on you made it weird yeah well what <hes> which one are you more embarrassed. Yes so then what comes up and how did he react when you send you what i do what you did to start a podcast. That's probably a smart way of going about it. What i do is i say hey. I have a lot of old people in my life. All they do is watch t._v. From their error yeah right all my grandparents did was is watch westerns yeah andy griffith. My dad ceo watches andy griffiths right so i'm saving the dope shows for win <hes> old because that's all wanna see anyway okay so it's gonna be new. I'm saving breaking batum saying saving the wire so if you go crazy these snow where the wire i feel like the scenes i've seen i was like a kind of like i kind of need to be removed from this for a while for me in. This school looks a lot like my school. Okay yeah but i'm only seen school seen so yeah. I don't know it's a high school. Germany and my is it is degrassi was based on the line. I think but yeah autumn shows i'm waiting you know so you're going to be eighty eighty and you're going to be like. Does anyone have a net flicks password. Komo is gonna be in the brain but in that's true you'll just shy. Shut your eyes and watch the wire. Lays is grandad sleep now. He's watching breyer. We'll be back to the what are those game boys that you are the virtual virtual boy. It'll just be over your. I like dragon ball z manner. He'll be watching the wire. It was it was seven dollars rent that from a watchdog western. My folks win do now. I've never ah told no because they were free. I would break them and things very break. Parents never lay you rent systems or get cheese bread with pizza the mad i can tell how much above definitely space yeah give them. Some big parents let you wear cool sneakers or bite down on job sneakers with the lights accessorize so much now because i it was taken away from me as as a kid val kilmer wasn't a big enough activist my shirt art. They don't like my saint merge what c._j. Have you seen in parks and rec. Think of someone like rob says he hasn't seen either these cutting madman madman. It's a heavy lift for the bracket. Yeah parks and rec is like i don't want. It's <hes> it can be a little too goofy or people. I mean people. I think that i have friends who i'm from. My hometown who don't get comedy not to say like parks and rec is like this wild. You know absurd comedy that you have to get it to like it but like they are like oh. We hate et goofy shit. Really it is pretty yeah yeah okay. I love beat the wire fan because people are voting on instagram and twitter for what what what it is and ah people really low. I mean i love park. I think it's very yeah i love parks and rec and i feel like parks and rec. I if it's on it could it could suck thirty thirty minutes out of me can suck it our ad me like and i loved it when it was on but the thing is parks and rec didn't get the love you really unlikely today he got he got the love from the people who loved it but it was you know it wasn't like the office also wasn't isn't the hit of modern family many emmys so it's hard to. It's hard to make a case in this like. I'm a google it. I'm gonna look it up. I do think that's one of the things i think i might be wrong by. Steve curl and amy poehler both never won emmy for for the office and for parks and recreation and you know family seemed to sweep up for which i've never seen this is pretty fun. I remember i fell off in the middle somewhere. Buddies always funny but i i think park snark is almost right in between the office in modern family where it's like very caricatured driven workplace thing mockumentary but you can't yeah. I don't know about shaming somebody for parks. This weird you wanna put somebody on parts and you wanna be like hey we watch just watch the first couple of episodes <music> with me. You know like like i get that but i don't. I don't know if you really you got to be in the crowd. You gotta you gotta be the right service depth of fits third fourth fifth deep like not just like the supporting cast like the i'm in two episodes of season so oh funny who are like purred happily and the people who are like in the show that much are hundred percent funny and i think getting like adam scott and in rob lowe is getting carried the show i believe struggling and they brought in a face to get it in the rob. Lowe thing was just such a home run yeah. It was crazy easy but it is a lot like the warriors get into this already so funny yeah and now it's so funny and the best guy is funny on it and it had stronger last couple seasons in the office it did. It was funny so unbelievable but i didn't even care 'til rob. Let's listen to is out the whole season <hes> all right our other match chep in the what you bring up if i might have to change the name of the bracket or of lisa the segments since the wire lost but <hes> we have friends versus the sopranos get another the comedy drama matchup. I think the sopranos could probably win the whole thing that's kind of. It's been the biggest <hes> dominant force in the bracket so far. I'm saving the sopranos until you're yeah. I mean i do watch it in meetings because it's you know you look like an idiot trying to sell it showing you seen the sopranos those last night. It was crazy right. I picture you. I know that's exactly what they thought based off of the ending right yeah. You know what enough to say conversion. I li- i picture you make pitch every show. You pitches something in the sopranos because you're so calm like yeah. It's a little bit like detroiters and the sopranos cartoon cartoon yeah definitely but yeah versus friends. I'm never going to go with friends. I'm never going to go for a hate for it's out shame you for like inference inside out yeah. I feel like i feel more shame because friends. This was like it was like the culture h. Sopranos was on h._b._o. Extra unit like the post seinfeld seinfeld coach nice yeah. I don't think i watched it was on t._v. It's all all right. I don't know i think i tried like watched through all of it when it first became streaming and i was like they're all bad people yeah and how do they all sit. It's it is so oh funny that the jokes about an hour. How do they afford that nice apartment. How come they have nothing to do but it's like that is true. None of them have anything to do any day of the whole show and they all have so much money yeah but it's all right i think it'll be i was going to be hard to beat. I think beautiful to give me to watch french. Take watching friends just man we should do separate podcast where i put the five episodes of friends that you would like no oh really mad when kyri came out with a friend's color way of the kyrie's like another another podcast where i get angry about yeah. I didn't like that club either dispose bob. I i would have been like all right. I'm here for rob never worn it where he won't go get stuff when it's collaborated by athletes shows they don't hey first of all stolen firm living in single. You know what i'm saying. It's been admitted that the the exact past living single regretted it was like let's let's make make our own version of living single <hes> third vault when i got to college there were people there that were obsessed with friends. They used the shame me for liking seinfield over friends. They tried to make me watch friends to fit in. I pretended to laugh bit friends. This is the most true to this part last conversation. We've had in the podcast like this. This is my gateway into like sander. Insane is like i have to. I have to get to the my true. What is come. I gateway into stand up was also laughing at stuff. Other people thought was funny y- the stand up it makes sense all right. Will somebody's gotta do something about this like. I'm not crazy yeah for not thinking like they need yeah. You know what i'm saying and if i ever meet if i ever meet jennifer levin wanted to be a show i would li- like you already take a stand right there. I mean courtney cox on my lab but you know what you long. Yeah yeah yeah well. They won't even care if you don't bring it up yeah no you you meet them office space. Hey courtney. I'm rob hey rob. What did you think of friend. Let's start. We ought to miller's came. That's perfect yeah. Were you ever onset at ready to rumble <hes> all right. We're gonna play a game called build the perfect movie <hes> <hes> this bill for movie. You must combine two scores from our category to build the perfect movie as close to a hundred percent on rotten tomatoes as possible without going over prices right rules apply so you're competing against each other. Okay <hes> know movies. Don't go over. You cannot go over okay so know movies ever seen prices right. I really nobody commission prices right lane like i really not really want anyone who has no right to write an episode of bryce yeah. They might know because they you might be right. Never seen by rob hayes based on what i saw. Happy gilmore me. Oh it's so funny <hes> <hes> okay so you two movies so what we're doing today is your both gonna try and build a perfect sports movie. Movie rob will go first then c._j. Okay then we'll recap the scores and then whoever has the higher or the lower rotten tomatoes score from them crystal and we'll go for arriving about rotten tomatoes tomatoes yet <hes> do they retroactively like older movies that predate. Maybe the website <hes> they. I mean everything's on there it it goes reviews those reviews from thirty nine those reviews from lake that is a great question it is it is from whenever the review was written like i mean i think like roger ebert has gone with the wind review on their scores. We're not going off. Audience score is going separate except for the old movies. Get you okay <hes> so i see you're picking any sports movie and then you've got to combine it with another sports movie. Okay eh one hundred all right. I'm gonna try to hit towards the middle. I'm not gonna try to go to high <unk>. Finding loewen's going to be difficult some going with basketball skip ball all right. Go ahead and just pull that up. What do you think baseball's around. I'm thinking <music>. I'm thinking forties but i don't know you know what i'm saying this like. I don't know about yeah so you go tin cup. What if i argued that was in sports movie but basketball was okay so let's recap recap rob basketball c._j. Tin cup baseball forty two percent komo komo tin cup seventy percents. Oh god okay. I got a really bad one so c._j. You're gonna go. I this round. You're going to try and get you. Gotta get as close to thirty percent as you can. <hes> all right. I'm gonna go thunderstruck kevin durant whole oh hundred hear. You're playing conservatively wait. This is the wrong thunderstruck academy award nominee. I can't even find it now. This is a movie about a yet moves in theory. I wonder how many theaters got thunderstruck. There's a katy web series at nike. He put out in those early days where it's him shooting. It is great. I we got thunderstruck rob. You are at forty two percent with basketball okay so here's what happens now. I'm gonna i'll tell you now actually just pick one pick one still figuring the rules this game okay. No i'm in between to <hes> see. I'm ago like mike. One year like mike would okay great well. Let's talk about it too because let's over kids. That's a pretty good movie. I mean it's going to be it. Is you know people generally review movies based on what they're trying to do right right like ebert would give four stars to a bad action movie trying to be a bad ex-movie and sierra <unk> cloud atlas or something like the <hes> okay c._j. Tin tub and thunderstruck tin cup seventy percent thunderstruck twenty seven seven percent ninety seven percent almost built the perfect movie rob basketball forty-two percent like mike fifty seven percent ninety nine percent yeah. I'm no head incredibly perfect move ever had to closest to sat up in my seat this whole time. I was just yesterday that i was like avenue i o six man would have landed shot you over six twenty. Three percent uh-huh yeah sad movie. We've ever made in the game is about lil bow inland the guy south park standing with we're doing it. That was crazy crazy for that who else who else got last time. Both people went over <hes> the first time we had someone. I think tom hanks was the first one was that right and someone like ninety two or ninety three percents but it was like from a not from eighty nine and then some two or three blake some something that bombed <hes> cambridge. I had to take tracy reynolds making it when i started doing the math when i looked uh-huh started sweating over here i was like i don't keep a straight face. <hes> boy all right great round all right now. We're gonna be working together for the next game. This game called before and after and how this works is <hes> explained it. A little bit beforehand is to movie title title smashed into one okay. I'll tell you the new plot. Sometimes it's like a perfect thing where it's just complete overlap <hes> sometimes like you'd be like once upon upon a time in hollywood nights. That's perfect sort of sometimes. It's like the wolf of wall e street where it's kind of smashed together. Just kinda gotta figure it out and shout out to the people who sent me these ones today. We got some from j. J. d. s. h. eleven and three chord me on instagram. Thanks for sending me before and after titles. It saves me time coming up with them but i wrote these plots all right. I want you ready. Here's the plot you told me the title a man and his young son wandered through a post apocalyptic world where they get hired as professional bouncers to clean up rowdy bars okay one of them. I'm thinking is after earth is road house about bouncers. Is there a movie called after hours. Yeah there is a man. His young son wander through a post apocalyptic world. Were they get hired as professional bouncers to clean up rowdy bars. Hyde is professional bounces cleanup. One of you has one of the movies right. Okay i feel it what other one of bouncer's bouncer movies if there's no no you're right. You're right with the bouncer movie. After that's what i was thinking about two so far i think okay roadhouse post-apocalyptic man and max <hes> codey banks was prepackaged just looking for though roadhouse oh the road it but that's more of a book than a movie it believe it or not the whole movie is a movie <hes> list because i don't even know what it's a better better book than it is moving vigo mortenson who's assigned vigo mortenson kid in that movie. The right to buckle up also a man in his son wandering through post apocalyptic world literally only eliminates. It's like seven movies that i've ever been made the roadhouse. What a jerk next one a secret society of assassins recruits a teddy bear that came to life and teach him to curve bullets. <hes> okay society of sciences ted wanted wanted they got it all right <hes> a forty year old working woman travels through a wormhole to look for mankind's mankind's replacement planet and during the trip ends up developing feelings for a handsome twenty something. This one's real dumb some back to the future. I'm thinking thirteen going on thirty. No because she forty uh-huh okay okay little. Can you say the beginning part again. Uh forty year old working woman <hes> travels through warm hall to look for mankind's replacement planet and during the trip ends up developing feelings for handsome twenty something this one's what i call a steak sandwich one so okay. The first movie is at the beginning and the end and the second movies in the middle is women in the title. No let's see planet of the apes apes they <hes> they was. They wasn't looking for a replacement planet. They just okay mine and my ligand for replacement placement planned movie. That is a remarkable planet. Nah that's mars. Oh no a replacement for something working woman who ends up developing feelings for handsome twenty something oh <hes> house her groove bag. How stella got got her planet back now looking for travelling through wormhole to look for mankind's replacement plan a wormhole home fine. How stella got her hitchhikers guide to someone who borrowed a book yeah. I've fell asleep when it moved <hes> day man what worm there's too many <music> horse to replacement plan also suit. This might not be a human. It might be alien that eh through the wormhole to find a replacement planet. That's your big breakthrough bad heavy out. See orlando jones. It'll movie posters and a pizza place so i don't know yeah give it to us. This is is how stella got her groove back. <hes> i've never seen interstellar christopher nolan favorite movies rebecca got that wants. She texted me. How interstellar gutter group <hes> all right this last one so dumb barely works one word here. We go to astronauts on a routine space. Mission are stranded in deep space with no link to earth and after landing on a lush alien planet one astronaut falls in love with alien woman and gets drawn into the battle for her world old that just seems like one movie really definitely does because both of these movies didn't have enough going on okay okay so to estimate stranded routine space mission are stranded in deep space with no link to earth okay no linked to earn they land on a lush alien world and one of the astronauts what's falls in love with an alien woman and gets drawn into the battle for her planet is drawn. It's a battle for her plan. So what are what are the two astronaut movies or to astronaut taught. I'm thinking gravity roof. Okay so gravity leary the <hes> euphoria with now the movie where we on is the the aliens you're talking about gravel battleship battleship alien the alien is begins with a v. is like oh yeah a._m. I know what you're talking about that though watched them on gravity or an astronaut look the world is not falls in love with gravitas dr gravitas. I am part because it's like fern gully yeah it is exactly what it is made this to astronauts get stuck in space to become heffernan golly to obtain him all right <hes>. What do we have those cards all right. We're gonna play a game <hes> another one here. This game is called character card head guessing game. It's like that game heads up on the phones okay or the diversity day episode of the office sort of like a combo those how it works is on these cards are characters. You won't know who your character is. I don't know him. Rebecca just wrote them. You you want you want you have two minutes to ask yes or no questions to try and guess who you are. Okay all right. Do the you want to go. I i all right so pick one of these and then hold it up to your head i get. I don't know why the cards are like this. <hes> upside down okay yeah. I know who this is rob. Ya know who to see how you can put it down now. Okay <hes> all right so your movie or tv character okay. You have two minutes to guess who you are. Okay just yes or no questions whenever you're ready all right ready. Oh wait take the headphones off them. When telephone who you want okay unplug quick is adonis. Johnson creed michael jordan's character from the good now it's just c._j. Looks like vacuum. We're good. We're good. I was just now. I was just sitting there to see along here. Take this car for me because two minutes yes or no questions discover who you are. Whenever you already information pulled up just okay specifics <hes> already yes all right. Is it a man yes. <hes> is it from the eighties. No is it no no no two thousands. No is it from the seventies no not from the decade thousand area. I love to thousands. I love the arts. Is it from our current decade. Yes yes. Is it a sitcom. No isn't the movie yes. Is it a movie that was nominated for anything. I think actually yes it was an oscar. I mean i'd have to look it up but i would have to do you know major category for a finnish did have a famous quote not in these yes the no i will tell you this because the the award thing is going to be confusing the only the it got nominated for best supporting supporting actor and no other academy awards <hes> is it did sandra bullock play. This character know eliminates a lot of the us from the team <hes> <hes> have you guys seen this character. <hes> is it <hes> from a like a fantasy or sci fi movie. No is it from a drama rama yes yes. Is it shoot another. Do they have a signature <music> outfit of sorts. Yes <hes> <hes> is it adapted from <hes> is the movie adapted from a comic book. Now is adapted from anything in pop pop culture. Yes yes is it but it's not sifi. No how it's based on a true story. No no no. I really wish it was character is it <hes> <hes> kill bill is at houma thurman and kill bill. No is it <hes> but that was a fun way to gauge that you are far away came out in two to three years. Is it considered a strong female character. No no <hes> shoot <hes>. Are they white no. Are they black. Yes okay okay. <hes> who <hes> i'm trying to think here. Is it the lead character in the movie seconds. See are they primarily. Did it become famous because of <hes>. They're an actor. What year did they become famous from acting yeah yeah 'cause i'm stuck on riyan on and you know what you think your woman oh. I thought i said that you never asked if you're a woman. Oh shoot. I thought i did <hes> okay. So it's a man <hes> uh-huh is it will smith and something no is it. <hes> teens his black panther. No no outs data from is it creed. Yes probably just goes to show you. That's that's why a lack of representation makes this game. That was crazy. The most recent things i've been watching has been black panther in creatine creeds great not based on a true story but rack is kind of based on something. It's <hes> yeah wrestling recipes between that cold war on his she was kind of bursley couldn't beat that guy in a fight though right mohammed ali. Isn't that the whole thing from once okay. It's not a new. He's been out for a week two weeks. Three times kept asking the questions. I would make it. They were all borderline. Has it wasn't a week woman yeah all right rob. You're up all right. Let's see what it is okay. I there's just you know who they are. You can put down okay. Take your headphones off. <hes> he is creed read from the office creed bratton from the office. I wonder if he's seen his show. Don't yeah we'll see. I mean he really on the other yeah. We'll see all right two minutes. You're a movie or television character two minutes. Yes no questions you're right. Was he. Two minutes you. He went to twelve but he was just okay. <hes> am i a man. Yes okay <hes> in my superhero. No no all right in my action hero now. Am i a villain now. No am i do. I wear a suit. Yes sometimes okay. <music> <music> journ pilfered okay m. i. Shady ah yes all right in my old. Yes my white. Yes okay from the two thousands. Yes the two thousand zeros mostly yeah okay. Am i television care. Yes yes <hes> man. I'm of in my walter white okay. I bet your character thinks you you are okay in my firm breaking bad now okay good 'cause i would've been in trouble all right <hes> uh <hes> do i shoot people. No i mean we don't see you know sometimes. It's imply that sir okay my tony soprano okay m._r. m._i._a. Lead cared no no. The questions are so funny. <hes> okay <hes>. Let's see in my in my big now. Okay <hes> in my ball. I think you're definitely ball yeah. Okay wispy is from a t._v. Show one minute. You think are involved in t._v. Show my shop people a little bit of here here. Though so don't yes drummer the shooting people not not a drama drama. Okay ari gold now now all right <music> okay larry david now know the character now okay would've told you. We don't give <music>. Let's see <hes> know you think i'm bout. It's implant i- sharp people. I wouldn't get to more hung up on the shady than the shooting shady saul from breaking bad now from breaking bed has ever costs out <hes> and it's not never never sold it <hes> <hes> t._v. t._v. I am i am a <hes> draper now. I worked two minutes. I'm going to tell you show you're on okay and i can go see or do you think that's too specific in either a hint or you can ask one non yes or no question because we're not even sure if he's seen it. You're on the office office. Get at him. Michael scott scott think about everything not a main character i i. It's gonna be all right. I i have i seen i don't know yeah but people and people who heard all right all right. I'm gonna do this last one seattle. Pursuit man may work for the denver mifflin. They got strict dress code all right <hes> because this year ear man no. I know what that is. Oh gotcha okay yeah. I know yeah yes <hes> all right. Tell them okay. Can you hear us now. He can't hear all right. It's alfred rid is less these days. I guess only from that yeah we uh-huh okay. We're good. We're good okay cool. Okay all right is is my name created in any way no okay. Do i have thematically have anything to do with these previous koreans. No am i on t._v. Show movies uh-huh time. Am i a man yes. Am i human yes. Yes my live action. Yes sometimes did i originate for my peter parker no and my superhero no no. Oh no mine superhero stuff yes. What do you mean my primarily known for that comic books yes and my main character in the comic book no my in a marvel world no mind the dc world yes am. I alfred alfred from batmans. Yeah he go which is last name molina. My alfred melina apparently well. That's a good last name for another and i've been seeing these billboards for pennyworth around. Is that alfred. Oh is it. I think it is. I read billboard. Yeah it makes sense. Well that would make say in parentheses. It said michael caine yeah. Oh dark knight trilogy. I didn't know what to do because alfred does existing cartoons is all right episodes of batman where he is. We put pseudo. You know what i'm saying like. I know he puts a suit on something. Yeah imagine the intimate series. It's adam westbound old alfred out within the car one time part yeah i mean he alfred really does it. All use <hes> like the aunt may of moral wow just killing it all right man that was good. I know screen green. I feel very easy once. I knew i wasn't also korean so mad. I was creed from that. Was that was unfair. That was a tough one all right. We're we're going to wrap it up with. A guests movie caused describing okay. We're never haven't heard movie some played all the way through <hes>. If you think you know raise your hand talking fast play remember. They're talking fast okay. He's talking so fast. I can't understand him. They're both talking fast. That's a fine hat. There's a dune buggy race in sand everywhere. The narrator raider even talks fast. They're both in flower shirts and driving through the desert narrow. Everything feels like a desert her. He doesn't know how long it's been weird. Colors crazy angles tons bazaar quick shots. He's in a bath. She only paints one person. The color is very particular so weird. He's got that long cigarette holder big glasses. <hes> mhm does all right. I think you guys both got around the same time here. Who wants to give it a guess. So should we do the same time c._j. Thank god i what we can do it. Three to two one wild and loathing only one of you is right is rob vegas. They did not only. Did you say different things. He bailed on you saying at the same time and you just said wild walk walk. Did you think maybe it was while i'd say movie moving. I've seen movie fast yeah. I was watching the video video where he raps about about wild wild west desperate brand. We're friday. No you don't want member told meanwhile c._j. Doing the theme to fear oh. Thanks for being here thanksgiving. Thanks for having never seen thelma and louise <hes> <hes> let everyone know where to find you both of which he got on if you wanna do that sort of stuff <hes> yeah twitter and we got me and rod have a show now. We have a show together is the eagle rock stand up. Show at kuzina. Filipina is called motherland. Not exclusively filipino comics very funny comex exclusively talknet saying that filipino counts aren't funny too late. We just cut the bs. When does this come out. This will be out in eight days. Okay so my album just came out. Yeah good shake. It out is called hazo. Pedia is a digital digital streaming platforms right now. Uh so we have some <hes> vinyl size <hes> download cards available my live show oh so if you want to feel like you holding a vinyl but don't have attorneys second twelve by twelve download car. That's that's economical. Unrest cycled plastic over your dad's old albums the brothers not a circle is a square is definitely take. The art is really cool. Art is only right and then <hes>. I mean y you get novelties. Anyways also wednesday's i._f._c. wide sherman showcase. I wrote on that. I'm also in some sketches is so check that out great all right. Thanks guys <hes> if you're listening <hes> and you're in denver. I'm going to be in denver here. In september for the high plains comedy festival and go find us on instagram and twitter and vote in the shame bracket. We're in the quarters which means we're only still a little ways from the end but god it will all that bracket thing will end eventually. Go vote in the shame bracket. <hes> instagram and twitter never seen anything stirling's a podcast network.

Coming up next