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<music> combat diva dom you're learning welcome back to the combat was podcast podcast issue girl teak jay and your garage and he should be and we are back back back then. They used to call me teaches. I'll be i'll be wanna say to jerusalem we. He keeps on the regular street night back before. I knew you gotta hustle high school. I had a whole gamut anyway. <hes> <hes> another episode on today. I just want to recap in appreciate audience. I mean and we have is so real received. I appreciate our love and all the feedback on letters out of e mails d._m._z. All that so we wanted to kinda put some of these some of the questions we never acid from previous episodes and some of the compliments slash comments says we curse the all out saying we'll put it all out there. I'm okay with it and put it all out. There and kinda talk about today. We actually started this podcast. As <hes> we just wanted a a place to focus on with pockets was risen for women. It's still is for women and mostly focused on women who who are trying to accelerate careers are are excelling in the careers their businesses their relationships. You know we want to give an outlet for women who are excelling emotionally spiritually a sometimes you just need that extra push that extra boost to keep on going to the next plateau we were we were coming from a combat perspective originally and realized that there was not a big difference between what we were going through as far as a combat perspective and what we combat every day as women and a lot of women jumped on the bandwagon egging and shot out to all the men too who are like oh my god y'all so it's always great to see it because they really mean it like i noticed for women but i was going to do with the mask and i was like okay. I like solid solid so i like the men who are self aware i would say a little bit to listen to the the episode especially the ones about sex and love it yeah because i'll i'll talk about six. Okay lewis doggone good. We we're gonna talk about it again but it was a platform for is a platform for women to kind of escape the battle of real life and how combat it and as we do a soldiers every now. Everything's a joke but we deal with a lot of things with humor. I think it's the best way that we get over obstacles in combatants and and things of that nature we a lot of jokes on and offscreen on and off the air soldier speak envied swing episode. We are cracking up right so i mean this is the way we deal with the challenges that arise in our day to day lives so we appreciate the the all the all the will receive comments and love and feedback that we've gotten from episodes were this is. This is what i deal with every day. No they should be are. Are i mean because you said a mouthful but i mean i'm just saying what use it as a platform to get a lot of things out. There allows stuff that we fill in laos the stuff that we go through and this is to get it out and then come to find out we have a lot of listeners and we not in this alone a lot of stuff that we think and maybe we combat nearby. A buyer sells but we get feedback to say hey. You know what you're not alone. I was gone through this too and everybody got a story so i mean i love that we we started this and i love that we're able to touch so many people and we feel the love and i love. I love to know that we help people so i've always wants wants to be that person to be like offer like i'm helping somebody absolute. So i agree bill where at one of our listeners i will. I will call her. M w w i won't say holding she probably don't care but on our one of episode where we talked about sex that sounds feasible but really not maybe so much and she was like all four. She was like what y'all doing. It wrong and i was like okay okay quyen. You enlighten me a little bit. She was like you didn't talk about sex movies. Try that in the theater in the in the theater like fast and fears. Dan have sex so in the movie theater. All fan fears come out today. Does it august now with the hobson who still moves moves out. I've done that. I don't think we didn't have you everyday for a form of sex yeah but malmo i mean we can say that you were a new lower frigging righi now. We can't show then win. The family show serhiy. We was like an all the way in the backpack he was young. How much do you i mean. I had a lot of i <music> when i was young. Just like i mean my mom lives to sometime so boyfriend in high school. We did a lot of spearman. Whatnot wow the movies but the movie it was it was born movie. I think think i don't know maybe it was hannibal. I think it was watching hannibal. A type of person are you. I don't know you can get into a horror. Movies wasn't really really a horror movie. What was just gruesome sociopaths anyway sociopath. Who does it i did. This is the gruesome part. Let me and get to i didn't want to so i did something. Somebody's head is about to get eaten. Let me get to who made it. No pun intended yeah it was. I i am that good. I'll make jokes about it and it's in the way that sounds now anyway so she was saying trust exit. Movies movies with tunisia has she. She can't talk about south shower six. She was like is great. You guys are not missing around ever so maybe griffey socks or some type of light shower shoes or something because gab griffey's long is this just sounds very problematic to try to have sex in a shower. Isn't it's slippery. Somebody get cold is just awkward but i don't know maybe she got. All school. Begin words to do it. I don't know drown saying drown another. She's had really really bad carpet. Burn all these before she talked. She told us about that and that she tripped on the train. It's i don't know how how it happened during sex but she she was on the train at nine sure exactly how now he was like look like like a locomotive that even ask you go green get down locomotive and i don't know it was like like a chief elena train so i'm like well first of all. I hope you're not judging her giving hannibal. Wait wait a minute. What about me dubb's not me if she has some tips and tools about how to successfully have showers sakes. I mean she probably just <hes> if she's listening just go ahead and <hes> she wasn't the only one who was out thousands greats. They may have a better shot with in 'cause. I may be show. I think we we both got a thinking about water now facing conflicting some people don't care like i can't breathe what up their nostrils and they don't care now i can't i'm. I'm not a good swimmer. So water does is is crazy. Yes she. She's has sexist some interesting places like she talks about reverse cowgirl aw which is amazing i agree with her a game changer and a skill so m._w. I appreciate you ride those. If you got a man i know he's a very happy person and if you don't get a man okay grew because so you might have some brand very happy with these skills that you apparently inhabitation so w you know who you are shut out. You know she's an avid listener. 'cause this is one of many actually fee emails things like she gave. This person has actually seen so again. Everybody talked about this episode. Everybody had and were they would've put yourself out there like don't say oh by name oh my god but when i have sex in it is it was it was like okay. I thought you were great for heaven's sakes. Well driving so i mean you're the hero john. You did done a lot of things. I'll go ahead. I'm like i did that in the car. I did this fun in the movies arm and i just learned today. That's why i keep throwing us a lot. I share sure a lot of places but i've done a brand. Everything's very very active anyway so it was it was an excellent the next one was on wearing the masks there so many people who said that the episode help them that they gained a new perspective and that they didn't even realize that they were wearing various masks for various situation that it had been weighing on them and you know now trying to figure out how to unravel it in one person in particular rodin and was like how how did you overcome. We'll see pretty much say. How did you channel your engine different way. When you felt like you were wearing too many mass stadium they phrase it's teaching and i will say that the way i channel the energy was that i i realized that it was my energy like i was creating these mass. I was creating my lifestyle at that point and i had all the power when you grow up. You used to blame things on either. This is no shades of spirituality or religion in no nope frame or no fashion but you use the blind things. He's gotta devil right right. The guy and i came realize like like some stuff. I'm making me do right. It's it has nothing to do. In the other extreme or another species or another deity is just me and and once i realized that i had that much control over my life i started little by little changing and knowing that i have the power to create new destiny for myself and now my desk needs to be bogged down and run around and cold with all this burden from everybody else because very little burton was minded i was carrying. It was every body else's. I was everything that everybody self care. Thing comes into play like i have to take care of me. Take care of myself. I can't be everything to everybody and be absolutely nothing to myself exactly exactly and that was the most important thing that i've actually learned the mind is how to take care of myself. I and love myself before. I spin on everybody else because innately. We all all want to be selfish. It's in our blood to take care ourselves. So why do we demand right because we don't want to be narcissism and all this other stuff but it's it's up to you to take care of yourself and case of some people that want you to take care then. We'll call you selfish but you feel guilty. How ironic is is that that i'm selfish for not taking care of your needs. How selfish does that make you so. It's a very big eye opener for me. I remember being in a restaurant. There's a store call restaurant depot and i was buying like bulks of crap not for me and i remember being on the phone with a good friend of mine and she was just like they were doing some forget. I got all the stuff to do i gotta do she was like none of those things. You've mentioned have to do with you. So what are you doing for you. Let on what are you do of you. At all. Today we have the courage to do for your own self and love your own self and not predicate every single moment of your life on someone else's existence yeah. It makes sense like you know what it was like the whole or that who had apple phones at that moment. I remember you being so busy like i mean all the time just busy busy doing something and for like maybe like the church was doing something for the other parts community us doing this president auntie cousin fran friend fam- like everything doing for you and you ask exac- and didn't get a chance to really do anything for yourself because you had to be everything to everybody to everybody else and and i just held it and whenever i needed for myself was on the back burner like i remember even spending my own money on myself because somebody else might need it. How crazy is a reroute joe mindset where you don't even take care of yourself financially. You might this last twenty. Hold onto. This outfit called supervisor selfish me for myself knowing somebody else might need. He's help you know just dumb. I had no clue what was good. I mean after going to therapy. I realized a lot of it had to do with the fact that sleep when my socks on that's not episode after after some some therapy and some friends time and some extensive time just focusing on me. I remember just hiding from the world like two weeks like i told the rest of the world i was away to a military duty and i did not talk to anybody the thing about the the thing about being everything for everybody is that you have to be there for yourself and no matter what form that comes in you have to do it and for people that were like me still like me they find time by a hiding and they hide and they go away into a shell and they know they cut they fall and you can't reach them. The problem is sometimes they don't communicate that was going on right so you just trying to call your friend friend or your whatever it was going to hang out and you leave a message is and they don't ask them to fall so that people worry exactly because they needed to hide though they could not they had nothing else left to give when instead of taking that time little by little take care of their self they just exhausted all of the resources everybody else until they literally literally had nothing else possibly to give and ended up at that point so when we did the mass up also actually one of my favorites too it was it out i had i had a great moment telling my story over again that it's okay to do for yourself and beat up for yourself and don't mike you selfish near make you a great humane because the great steward of yourself because if you can't take care of yourself you can't take anybody else because if you are and everything everything else falls apart too so everybody needed you deplete it. All your energy like what are you have. You have nothing yeah and if you take care of you you'd wanna tell me that's who i remember be. John fund to one night and it was late. One thirty and i was just like ed wit's end like just super stressed and i was telling you everything i gotta do this. <hes> you're like man. I mean you have little pieces of yourself everywhere. It's like a little piece here in this first person and you were like the problem with that that is you have lent out every piece of you and now you have nothing left for yourself to give your exhausted and that's true like is getting exhausted like wow so my advice to anybody in that does even dealing with that because i am somewhat of messiah complex again all started would be sleeping masako and now they're so right another episode. I'll go into that. One day on therapists like you know you're throwing a fit because all all asa sleeping with designs on it was a great way for me to see. I was doing so much for so many other people and i wouldn't do it for myself until i realized how to do you for myself and i have been amazing ever since i'm a boss now. I'm a boss who yourself. That's how i got through. The a lotta people commented on an episode. A lot of people said hey great. It gave me so much energy gene. I didn't even know i was going through that until you put it that way and now we realize i realized that that's what was going on. I appreciate it and so many other people ooh it really seriously brought to your eyes because i did not understand the concept of the mask until we talked about it so and that's what the show was all about a <hes> bringing the community together. We can all go through that together so amazing amazing. Another great episode was a lot of feedback. We got from the girl code episode. When it was another one of our variety shows that <hes> we talked about different ways where you know uh that we break the girl code or which code applies and blah blah and one of the girls that this person brought up is what about when your your friend starts dating your brother and you try to warn your friend is your brothers. No good been there and then dan you and your friends ended up having friction because your brother and shit so. I mean i've been there. I think you've been there but just like like on a the opposite in me trying to tell my brother that my friend wasn't jaw and owls accused of trying to interfere with their relationship and i'm like because i'm like she is my good friend n._s. Is my brother and i'm like dang what you want. You just jealous jellison relationship because i'm taking up her time trying o._b. Hanging around his much mike nah i mean she you know she'll be doing extra shit right yeah. He likes has not true like i'm with her and she was just like ooh okay. I found whatever you were caller and i've seen it. I've seen 'em on. Is you just lying how you you made it good jazz crazy yeah mine with the other way around. I was always trying to get my brother. You know he kind of icing. You know how to use the last time he has a charming colgate smile so like you know women tend to ford because he's he's a charmer. Hey you and what you want the best beauty you know and they like to say everything. He's in prison but they they they they. They love by brother but i always say look. He ain't no he ain't august monogamy. Don't do don't do don't do it. They probably just thought she was just being yeah shady. Yes just like thought he could be changed like everyone but he he he could be such a good guy when you wanna be like now but he treat the women his live. I saw goo goo. He's good. He treats his sister gray. I know he a good man like he just treat us good like and that's only sometimes like sometime. He could be jerks six. Oh like maybe he's really good to multiple. That's my point exactly. He's allegra. Everybody uh-huh polygamous. Yes i've had issued before. I mean what are you doesn't break the girl. If it's your friend a gift and they don't listen to you it could cause friction in girl coast so i would agree that that could be girl co problem yeah don't don't they appear friends siblings. That's always bad juju no matter how you put it about how he goes relationship going to be affected a a lot of times. It's it's the friendship the girl yeah so absolutely absolute- on the mother's day episode actually it's an issue be. Somebody said they they feel you. They also they are in the air. Force young lady <hes> also has a child with autism and she talked about how so difficult to leave her her son in his condition because she found out you know before she went overseas that he was autistic and she could not imagine finding out while being being deployed and so she she applauded you and in your strength and she she really appreciate the episode and you being vulnerable enough to talk about your son so will thank you very much for just being open about your struggles with the same thing that i struggle with because i just remember just fill in like ninety even really knowing exactly what was autism when i was over there. I'm like what what is autism. I'm like you hear person like all day touched or they special or they you you got issues or people think autism and down's syndrome. Are you know synonymous with each other and i'm like i didn't know so. I spent a lot of time overseas. He's doing research in and going over. They have like a checklist for like you know things to look for to see if his signs of of autism and and i went through just like a morning stage of like oh my god like this is my kid i thought he was healthy vibrant kit and then go through the checklist and a lot of checklists. I'm like i'm in denial nylon like well. He just liked to do this and maybe he just likes to do that. And maybe he's just different. Maybe he's just that all of this wild deployed right yeah already fill in like fill in the anguish of leaving him as such a young age but then to be leaving him and he's going through something that he's is going to be a part of his life. Probably i believe for the rest of his life so i thank you for for sharing your story and <hes> i feel good knowing that you know i touched. I you know you know amazing amazing. That's what the show was all about. Another <hes> episode that was very big was using power as rank and we'll rank as power so it was rain and a a lot of women came back have to say this guy had this trauma when i was overseas where a guy came up to me or even guys like you know a superior officer <unk> came onto them so it's so important that that discussion continues to be had and one in particular caught my attention were there was a a a a a series of people involved in this person's assault so hey you know sarin first-class. Someone show wanna z. and they were like okay you know out m._w._r. Day type of thing and <hes> then i go to the barracks and the barracks sending guy there e. e. five sergeant is like hey sorry someone once upstairs in his bay. If you know anything about the military we have like a barracks right and the higher enlisted usually take the single room for themselves and the rest of us cannot take the whole bay right ends usually a male because there's more males than females so so you know when in his room and he just begin to kind of talk software in caress her in she was a <unk> pretty she had no idea that that point was coming when she went upstairs to see him personally and <hes> i just thought it was just all types of wrong with the situation will furthermore that that guy will use all these different people and that they would know and still sitting here into a trap so i think we've come a long way as far as you know <hes> abuse as far as that goes here but we still have some strides to me. I think that that is very important <hes> to speak up. I know a lot of times. I'm like you. You scared and i'm like i know how that feels to just be scared and you fill in like well well. It's my fault a lot of times. When something like that happens we we blame ourselves for not seeing the signs or maybe not picking up on the body language or largest not picking up on anything and we send ourselves into a compromising situation and we don't put the blame on other person that actually assaulted assaulted us <hes> so i think that is important that you that you tell somebody and you speak up and be afraid and also document document what said document what's done and tell somebody because sometimes a lot of times. When you wait too long yeah it you're less believable yeah sometimes in some instances if you don't have proof because sometimes the the details get a little fuzzy and you don't remember every single solitary thing so you may have to come. I'm to a person as like a battle buddy something that you really really trust <hes> and talk to them. Why the details is fresh in your mind. Absolutely if you don't want to bring a higher higher at least tell somebody and talk to somebody about it. Absolutely i agree with that one hundred percent and we as always we appreciate that transparency because it lets though like you know we we all in this together now. One of us is going through something. The other lincoln chain can identify with and help you out with so we appreciate reshape that vulnerability in that feedback noten today should be and i both have a a a friend who was going through p._t._s._d. He told us his story yeah he <hes> he didn't know that he was going through a depression until he realized he had literally in all aspects cut himself off from the whole entire like world he cut himself off from his brothers cut himself off from his sister from his in he was married at the time he even cut himself off from his wife he wanted to be completely and utterly alone one body talk to him by the him anything and then he had a moment to what he's like wait. I'm completely by myself. This is not normal and he realized wait this is this is what depression sean looks like this. I'm i'm depressed. I can't remember exactly how he pulled himself out of that dark place. I just know that he did make it on other side because he's you know he's still here to tell the story he's not just you know an institution or anything like that but those were things where he realized that we go oh through so much in the military and don't have time to process any thing that happens to us especially no matter how traumatic matic whether it's a near death experience or you've watched someone close to you die or you've been close to someone at died in combat on mission shen and realizing that once you step into the civilian world and you no longer have that routine now you're left to process us everything that you didn't get a chance to process and it can be overwhelming. You can overload joe brain. Nesting you know you you may snap or you you may you may regress or you may egress. You know you don't you don't know exactly how you you're going to be affected about. Oh aw you don't know how it will affect you until it does and you sit in just this <hes> this darkness clough man that is that is so true do you don't know until you're in it. I said then when you're in it you're trying to claw your way out of it and sometimes it takes a village. You know so again again with the platform was four. We can help be the village. You know. I'm not a psychiatrist anything like that but i can help you the village i can help where we all been through in canada alesana right direction 'cause sometimes your story helps you all you need to know us that somebody's going through the same thing that you're going through and they have the courage to talk about it so they now somehow it gives you urge. You need to be a therapist the end just telling your story helps. It helps just like also one of our beginning episode episode six about. I don't like my keys. Sometimes i mean people were like relieved that oh thank. I know oh right. Oh my god it gave him a platform to not be judged about not really having a best feelings a bunch of keys sam. Sometimes it'd be a jerk and it's okay for you to say that and you to feel that way. You still love your key yeah but you can't be a jerk and it's okay to be able to let it out and not feel jerseys and not i feel like a bad parent. Obama bed is just like what it is. They may feel they make you feel so oracle. Yeah mom mom made me feel horrible. I was like oh. My god is getting on my nerves. You shouldn't say that you you shouldn't be like that. I was like buddies getting he really is. I'm like whatever he's doing. He's back there. He's making he's. He's just doing the absolute most and is bothersome hell and he just stop it. Yeah yeah you don't don't do that. Don't i'm like i didn't say anything. Well listen. I've just like oh yeah but she tried to act like you know like we didn't get on her nerves. Nerve parents like this is easier a lot of times easier for grandparents or people in outset to see all the stuff that you're doing stuff that you're frustrated about <hes> but they don't do back to look in the mirror at themselves to see like okay. That was once meat. He's sexy wasn't always pleasant with us. Oh yeah yeah but i forget that as there is a raising their around their grandkids you know different ballgame so yeah i i can appreciate the feedback that people realize like oh my god thank you know i don't much also big shout out to those hiring high high ranking officials mostly female who listed the show you know lieutenant colonels colonels chief warrant officers who are like obama doesn't really female chief warrant officers when particular was reached out a couple of sounds like oh my god. This show is shit. Thank you for talking about real stuff. You know so i mean from a warrant officer from female perspective right a female worn out so you like like oh my god. Thank you you too big warrant. Officers are damn does female warrant. Officers are even slimmer number so it's amazing when you get those feedback uh even lieutenant colonel kind of reached out and it was like okay. I like it. I didn't know as far as i like it. I like you guys and actually one of our former. Former officers was like so. I heard the show we're we're. We're really into stuff. We were overseas like we do because we have added some stuff like this all all out there now that we probably embellished thing. I don't answer to you anymore. Sir good day yeah. It'd be like no no no c. t. g. because because land still throwing me under. Please don't put me at a parade. Throw me right on the bus because i meantime the end of the day. I'm beating one friendly. Arrest yeah because you still inside. We're about none of these. People say it'd be like so circa two thousand four in two thousand two thousand ten like so exactly when you wake back average. I don't recall i i can tell them. We was getting trashed. They're not i i don't recall. I was the one bringing at hall drugs in the country. Uh-huh i can get away with it now what you gonna do would you gonna do what are you going to do. I don't know what you're going to do. I just wasn't involved that was probably on a mission. I got pictures so yeah. Great towns yes so yeah we we have great times serving our country doing join what we need to do. A getting lit and continue in mission is i don unknown to three a._m. And wake up at five a._m. And run and run a five hour. Get up and run a five k. and then i would you know <hes> report to my duty area and helped my lauren listed drinking drinking song from the night before with water and ivy story or an ivy me so abby begs. If i drink too much like she was soon as a combat lifestyle. Do they call them. Seal esque ask acronyms for choose combat lifesaver so she had our bag and she was <hes> dehydrated and it's very hot over there. Get up to one hundred and twenty degrees anybody buddy who was in a unit when a medic is on staff. You have to admit that you have gotten an ivy after drinking too much for dehydrate anybody because he because you just regular because that's the bound land. Water is every what are other listeners had a question for both of us and they said when i came home from afghanistan i was a horn in need person feel. She says she just wanted to have sex and go to sleep she said do we know of anybody or if we ourselves have have had a similar experience when coming back from a war zone i mean well i had had <hes> i had two deployments one. I was <hes>. I was eighteen to nineteen years old. I was i was deployed two thousand four two thousand five in the beginning of the war and you know that wasn't i had some issues with that with the first <hes> with the first deployment i went through some trauma so when i came back home yes i was but then was to try to suppress something. A hat went through over there so i didn't realize many years later her. My behavior was kind of a symptom of what i was going through. What i had what had happened to me while i was there. Now now my second deployment <hes> not quite happy issue. I came home and was like a horn dog because i was able to you you relations. I i was a loving or anything i relations while he was on the i had itching shen in somebody new and yeah i remember i remember that yeah go tell all ya'll because nobody they wanted to bring these people back to barracks these females down to getting it on and they brought them back to i got to i had to live here and and we it ain't like we all get our own room. There's a sheet dividing everybody so if you're having sex on the other side of the sheet guess what i know about it. That wasn't me because you know i was there. I was serving my country house. Continue emission you driving and charles to other people other people was like my friend i mean i had to put on headphones and she sex was literally almost almost happening outside of her bid because i've seen feet fallout arms and it was shaking the bid and it was hitting the locker next to my bed so that was my own business in the middle of the day i catch now grey's anatomy house binge watching grey's anatomy. We you know d._v._d.'s from the w._r. Whatever and i my headphones couldn't go loud enough because i'm like i feel like you just got too comfortable. You just got too comfortable because not at home right. It's it gets good hitting can control what added that down a little bit and then they go back to that damn minute okay. Yeah ain't got dan going yeah who all sex sound. I don't wanna i didn't wanna hear. It felt like i was traumatized. From that moment. I was like i just because i never been in a place place where people was have around me. Then that calls for activity like literally there are a few steps away like divided by a sheet right is that that was a big like a big door or something in a way like oh. There's a sheet there. The person rome like oh keep it right you not right there but to where like little <music> sheet day over here all types of positions in hands outside of the bid out from underneath the sheet does the baton i see hands and then on flow on well. That's really interesting. It was interesting. I don't know i'm gonna have to ask a lovely friendly. What position was doing it get your hands on the flo gonna make it was doing yoga to play twist oda. I like it but i don't have the same story. Actually i was the super n._c._o. Do so like everybody. Does i wonder if i was okay with the with the drugs and alcohol but i wasn't okay with the six because at one person that 'cause we share alcohol drugs everybody. It was a free a free free country where that it was concerned. Sex you uh-huh hall for the low price of eighty dollars. You can have a water bottle. Full the vodka but that i will but i i would. I had dylan in the sex arena like i couldn't wait. Wait wait almost sound like traffic. I wanna be a pimp. I didn't make money the office. I was like nah we joke about drugs and alcohol. Come come through this barrack but no i i the illegal when when i went on my first deployment ah transparency moment q. virgin chambers. I actually was a version on my first deployment. I wasn't having sex with anybody but when i got back home i don't know if the near death experiences but i was a complete horned owl like i was just horny. Where i lose goes into somebody well i wouldn't even i was i was i was like man. I'm just a horn dog just got to get this out my system get okay yeah. No problem course right right well when they go through like i just got to have sex with okay you want to weigh in. How how do you just casually hyman. I gotta you do that as casual yeah. It was very casual. I had i just need i had each as you said that needed to be scratched in very casually scratched it when i came back from afghanistan so in areas like maxwell like no it wasn't a little i didn't right so it was different it was we weren't even relationship but he was. He was my friend as you sound like a sexual experience with the lights is all on everybody. Got see what's happening is same. I'm very unromantic wasn't looking for just the album for one thing orgasm so at the i had that i was like how does gaz them when you never orgasm but you know it's like even if you ain't never had it. You know that you horny you. Oranje feels like so you you you you give it feels razan tim kelly okay so temperature arise in like in your body. Oh newark new dr kelli county jail but i just headed it was see anyway so virginity after i went to afghanistan and i know he was my go-to person for sexual while till i was in a committed relationship. Oh that's good. I had him from being because i had just come back from war and i couldn't commit anybody at a whole oh problem but he was the go-to. Would you don't know when they get together. South south. I i know at least a lot of people are judging me right now and that's okay but that with this story but was horn dog. When i came back absolutely came back the second time was horned off even though more but then we get we kind of like almost using them as a piece of meet because we've gone through some of us got to get that out is literally animalistic rage. Lionel lions six like it ain't like regular like oh just want to be with you and this is love is just like i gotta get this out. I was like take off the clothes. I i'm not gonna. I'm not a piece of meat came. Just come on and just i want to have sex and i'm just going to do it but during this whole speech he was taken the office closed like i. I'm not gonna not a piece of meat right. You just not gonna treat me so anyway where you want me to be it when i when i come back home and i don't know what that's about. I don't know what it's about when you come back home from war that you. There's like something like you have a to. I think it's freedom have may be freedom because you do everything that you couldn't do. Why would you want to do with us but you know you do everything you can do. I use overseas so that was my one thing that i not one thing but it was one of the things that i wanted to because when i gave back home we got back home us remember. We're on the subject but we drank a lot. I remember going to a party in one of our friends had a black and white party a birthday this it was in the middle of winter and i mean we asked the food at this point. I mean we were barbarians at the party like i remember civilians. Regular people at the party was like people don't usually act like one of my friends that was with us. That was a regular civilian. She was like jano don't act like this clubs y'all on top of the bars and tables and couches to cocaine in the bathroom like this is not me per se but it was cocaine snorted in the bathroom and she was just like it's a lot going on with your it like on the boss cocaine of sleep on the floor like this can't be as he was like standing on guard astounding on the couch is yes on tables. Yes not to wait. Wait a minute yeah. Well you come back from war you. Just you know how to act right because you just you've been calls. They have like it's like a cage bird bedtime. There's no there's no formation easy. There's no report like there's nothing in this like this time and in my pocket full of money exactly you got a pocket full of doe bottle service. How does that about five hundred got it. I've got forty grand in my pocket but now you like six hundred dollars. There's like we're gonna go get regulatory pre-game. We all about pre-game now eight hundred unless you i mean if you got it. You got it. You wanna do that with your no money. Hey whatever whatever is. I ain't about their life exactly six hundred dollars for forty dollars. I'm not doing it so to the to the queen. That was is over for sexual. You feel like you're not over sexual. You're just sexual and a lot of us. Go through the same moments of you. Gotta get that out. There's a lot of pent up frustrations and anxieties and all type of stuff going on when you come back home. No matter what would you could've spent your whole deployment and defect perfect and you still come home. Facility for people don't know in fact is done assortment dining facility deployment. They're never going never seen the actual bombing or whatever maybe the base bomb but that's it. It is still a urges side of you to just. I don't know black snake moan. You know you wanna come home and just do it yeah and then if you feel like you're doing to too much and you think that it could possibly be issue. You might actually be a issue and you. You might need to really talk to somebody because you might be covering up something that you're going through your practice as fix release. This episode brought to you by trojan <music> joking. It's a joke. This is chosen isn't endorsements i but i do. I do believe that you have to take care of yourself. Protect yourself still but you know we get wild when we get home. Be safe have flown with it. Wow we wow so. Those were some of the highlights though of some of the episodes that we had no we get lost in the sex object right because sex. You know get into it but it's fun when you're over thirty. That's what you do the female you're thirty. Well you know yourself sexually. So you okay talking about have you had this is me like it. When a whole lot twenty eight we know a whole lot i in iowa. I can't help it we when you are in your twenty but not comfortable talking about sex as you are when you like thirty thirty in a company of mixed mixed people who care of you know these people are not gonna have whole conversations about sex and all. I think when you get older you like you you start. You give less fox because i mean 'cause when you were younger. You got the people just like you you give here. I'll give here who gives him. Only only hope people will label you. They will judge you so you. You keep a lot of stuff to yourself. You like okay well. I'll do listeners but a lot of people don't do as taboo abu or whatever but now i do it this way that way this way way this way i use this this this toy at toy and i use these cuffs and and and these ropes and whatnot and if you do it's fun. Jit get witted get into that's usually like when you know yourself which is after the age of thirty like thirty is the mouse on asia i think and after that you don't really care about the bad juju concerns sakes you just you can talk yeah no problem so this is the cause your life yeah. Hey laws you having fun and you having safe. I mean you have a safe sex. Safe sex <unk> sex sago lonzo safe going to be good examples is definitely safe sex but have it so we appreciate all all in all we appreciate the reception of our show this the the love the feedback listens the lives the everything it's been absolutely amazing we ain't stopping but we just wanted to take a moment to show our love and show you love the show i love and support and thank yous a <hes> you guys out there and <hes> podcast lamb and so there's more questions yes. There's more we we. We eager to answer everything question. If we own oughta answer we go find the answer for you. That's good and this is how you send us those questions to initiate be. How can they reach us. Hey battles you can reach us at combat divas podcast on instagram as well as youtube combat divas how one on our twitter account combat divas podcast gmail.com combat divas podcast on our facebook page. We'll see you are there by combat diva stomp. Tom your combat <music>.

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