Amy Schumer and Kim Caramele
Hi I'm kate. Hudson is Oliver Hudson. We wanted to do something that highlighted our relations and what. It's like to be siblings. We are assembling rail though. Now don't do that with your mouth revelry. That's good this episode. Your about to listen to his Amy Schumer and Kim Carmelite Sisters and unfortunately I had influenza A. NOT BE NOT CORONA. Let's not get crazy here but influence a I was unable to make the trip and I was actually super bummed out because I was. I was very excited to hang with these girls. But I did find an amazing Replacement her name is Goldie. Hawn she happens to be my mother and I I don't even know what I don't even know what the hell they talked about. I haven't listened to it. I I don't even know like I'm sure it's GONNA be Great. My only fear is is that you guys are going to enjoy my mother more than myself. And there's going to be a petition on move on dot org that is going to kick me out of sibling. Revelry and my mother will replace me. I really don't want that to happen. I mean I do hope she does a really good job. Maybe not a great job at a really good job. So it's like. Oh that was really fun but you. We still want Oliver that. That's what I'm hoping for Anyway I'm sure it was amazing aiming Kim or amazing I've known amy for a little bit now but I'm actually just as excited to listen to this as you guys are so enjoy listening along with you. Kabir Meli one is fiddler on the roof. Shoe Lewis. I'm so happy to be happy new year. You guys are here. I know and it's so funny because Oliver can't be here because he's sick. He's got the flu and so we come to. New York and I was saying. Oh my God this mom was GonNa be here and I was so excited because it was like this just worked out so smoke right. It's so Oriali. I'm sorry about the flu but when I heard you the flu I was so excited because I knew that Goldie was coming of age shrieked out of the window and delight in our cabin. It's true and I was like he's really sex she's like. I don't Care New York. Yeah was my first real new year's her with both hands up into light can be. You're saying that you you love this. Podcast YOU LISTEN TO IT. And what was the moment with Goldie? You heard the episodes and Goldie you had you called in. And they're like Oh mom's calling and I don't think you called in on purpose no because you just see you kind of just got right to business you're like wears. Bodet like no like hello no not just like boom where whereas Bodey at and and you guys were talking about how Goldie you had gotten a chef for Oliver when he was in college and I guess you guys had some follow up questions about that and and the phrasing of the question was such that it was so delightful so Oliver said you know when I was in college. You got me a chef and you were like yes and he said. Why did you do that to me and you just burst out laughing as I'm rave injustice that you caused him. Why do that to me? Why did you get that for me and you just laughed and laughed and laughed before you could answer and I had to pause it because I was laughing so it was such a delightful as like this contest. All of setup they sent me up is that you know we did it. Oh I called. I mean you know I know one of those moments. That was hilarious. Because we were just talking about you and the phone rang and all that goes. Oh my God it's mom one hundred percent it was. It was so funny. But we'RE EXCITED TO BE HERE. So so what we normally do on the podcast. We start from the beginning worm. Brother Jason half brother and then you came along and me and then Kim Okay and so where did you guys grow up? We grew up among island. Yes kind of in one of the few towns that had few Jews so we were raised. Jewish JEWISH. You like yes. Yeah I can relate Yes like a like a hint like just a little. Like grandmothers headwear reformed warmed. We're so reform that we just say Bubalo once in a while. And that's the extent of her Judaism. You know once in a blue wool right. Oh Yeah Yeah he had a bat Mitzvah but then by the time it was my turn like we were all kind of over it until I didn't so I don't want to do that and I'm like how come she's on that but I still got like a party really. There's no downside for you but I mean without very without the reading. I went to temple on Friday night. I went to Hebrew school on Saturday soccer. Yeah but anyway. We grew up in this town. It was like a ton of Irish Catholic people and uh and we were kind of like one of the the Ju- families and yes explain kind of the house in which you grew up with Lou. I'm actually writing and starring in the show for Hulu right now about that we were. We were. Our Dad was really wealthy when we were really young. I'm she can tell Ya. Oh yeah and we lived in like kind of a mansion and you know they. He had his own plane for a little while. And then lost a free thing. And so I just because you can google map anything. I looked at the house we lived in and then I looked at the House. We moved to and it is shocking. That was until you're about nine and I was five. Are you trying to plug the musical? Nine to five. Yeah is that not? Is that not? We're told us this. Oh okay okay. Well then we so you moved within the same town like literally from the mansion to it was richest her eggs and to like a tiny and then we lived in people's basements and then we lived in and then my mom and I were sharing a bed and it was like a reverse Russian doll. I counted one. I think we in while I was in high school. I think we lived in Was a twelve different houses and apartments more than every year. Yeah got smaller and smaller. Do you remember it? You idly earlier do I do I. I remember like little flashes. Oh you're closed thought word yeah. My clothes got ready at a new. Let your hair go to show and I like a deed there and it's but yeah it was. Amy was about nine about five. Which I know about we start you know like because when I think when you first lose your money like a real housewife you like still kinda live in a mansion. Somehow one good credit card and then and then you have to like face reality and live in like a shoe on but my joke that I at my age. The only way that I really felt the loss of money was in the quality of my birthday parties. 'cause LIKE ONE YEAR. I had a farm party and there were animals and it was a big carnival and then the next year the theme was dancing on the ceiling. And my dad just turned a camera upside down and filmed us like dancing around a light fixture and we got a pizza and everybody was like had to chip in for the pizza. I mean it was dark because we do. We have home movies. And so you can really like we get to watch like the Progression. Like of our downfall. Where like here and then I'm like so we get to like really track okay. What was going on in the family for all of this to happen lost business. Our Dad was diagnosed with MS and then like right on top of that. The bankruptcy was caused because they own a baby furniture company where they were importing baby furniture from Italy and so you know parents on the upper east side. We need a crib from Milan today. And then other people started doing it too so it just wasn't he didn't have a monopoly on it and so so we business went under. Yeah Yeah and you know. My Dodd is so deeply that there are pictures of gold. All over his room loves mommy. Yes Sir Yeah I love him. You're so sweet I mean anytime. Oh every time. Well when I learn more you know I realized he was not an easy man no Lot of a lot of stuff and I think that what happens which is so interesting. Because I've seen your time with him. Yeah and your care for him and your empathy for him and you know taking him doing all of it. Yeah and it's so beautiful because it shows you know we do have great capacity to forgive and you just love your parents and you love your parents exactly. Yeah so it just did suits just testimony. Yeah you forgive them. That's what I try to remind myself that to you. Know I'm trying to be so great. During this time were gene. He's ten months. He won't even remember. But I watched the show. Love after lockup where like the parents are in jail and they get out after. I need to know what the show. It's on Friday night. It's love after lockup. Its life after lockup you know when you find something so joyful you have to extend the brand the story so there's lots of different versions but you see these parents get out after like eight years and Julie. Mommy there's no you love your parents exactly exactly. Yeah no matter what. It's not easy it's not that easy. It's a constant negotiation cycle. So mom and dad were together. For how long ten fifteen. Yeah they were. They're married for fourteen years and then they got divorced when we went to this one to this small. Yeah so I was eight twelve of my bangs. I just have to also say my bangs had never been so I house was here Amy's bangs. Were here so right at the time where you're all of a sudden getting a body and your period your also. Your family is crawling apart. Everything's falling apart is like tr- very traumatic. I loved it. It was blast literally in your fundamental years. You're saying that everything. Your whole life turned upside down and exactly and your father you wrote was a drinker. Yeah yeah he drank. Yeah now we. We didn't really know though. Well we didn't know until because our mom hid from us but it was out of hand we were little. I mean there are things you can remember like like he would just be kind of passed out somewhere. But you're just like dad must be dire. It wasn't like a negative drink like we never had like a bad vibe from him at all. It wasn't like an angry drinker. Or you know he was just like a sleepy one then. One day he showed up to spend time with us and he got off a bus and like taking a bus on long. Island is not northlake typical for you. Now this is after the divorce. Yeah and We were like. What are you taking the bus? What's going on you know? And he was like he turned out he had so many. Dui is and he could no longer drive and we a couple times had to go visit him in detox. Which for like probably. No one knows anybody will. Actually you guys probably know people but most people don't know anyone who's drinking to the point where they would need to go to detox to stay alive. Yeah you know. It's like that's serious. And he was so depressed so yeah well that's sad but look at us now like we're we're filled with so much character and charisma arriving. I wonder if if we don't have that you don't have that struggled. Do you think like you can still be an interesting full person. Challenges are important but also resilience. And I think you're born with a level of resilience that you can move through this. I know a lot of people who are not resilient who literally it does affect in a very very dramatic way and negative way and you know their life is. The trajectory of their life is not that good. So I think he's talking about Barbra streisand initiative. She could sing. Your names really good. How much did you guys lean on each other during that time? Well I think it's also like when I when I look back at like a bunch of the like pretty dark Real Real Dr Gomez. Dr Stays real dark days like I never remember like amy and I kinda like crying with each other or anything about it. I remember like the things I remember as looking at each other like your this is so mark and then like laughing and then like doing something like really fun just the two of us about it but yeah we clung to really longtime are there and just kind of not like actively not letting this dark stuff are around us kind of like affect our days. There was one day where our dad was like. I'm going to take your girls to see rent. And we'd already seen it a bunch like we loved seeing Broadway shows. We loved rent. We're rent girls basically were rent heads and And so our. Data's like got tickets to the matinee and he. Ms Is a hell of a disease and it was had been in remission. He was coming out of her mission. He was like you know. So it's like you don't really understand. But he would walk really slow like it just slows down here and so we get into Manhattan and we go outside the theater. And and he got the tickets and they were like these are to the night performance and he knew he couldn't he can't physically hanging. He sits so he sits down on kind of steam pipe on the city. It was like look just kind of takes the scene just like just looking at our dad knowing like he's just taking a break because he looked kind of failed someway and and it was really sad really dark but we were also at an age where we were like wheels are turning like dad. Give us the tickets. And we'll just stay in Manhattan. Yeah we're like you've got and you go and it's fine and we were like you know pretty young and loose in the city and we're just like you know we went we yeah. We went to museum natural history. We got who's got wine like a free white wine at a Chinese bows and we got to go. See Ron. I mean you know so you made me the most. It's really we've real dark images in memories and moments but followed immediately by like us having like a nice time with each other. There's nobody on the planet that understands each other than youtube. Yeah totally it's like the craziest bond is it's so ORLA awesome and and you guys are even working together so it's just stays in continues and it's like unease love working together it. We've had a really good experience. Any work together. Yeah on snatch and it really was fantastic. Yeah it was and you kind of finish their sentences but I'm always interested to know because there is. There is sibling rivalry which is revelry as the play on it. But in terms of that. W- what kind. How do you argue? How face like? I don't get that arguments doing you know. I mean when we do it but I just I have to say like that. I'll be like a couple times. Had An argument in front of some of them were close to you like a friend and after I'll be like I'm sorry you had to see that. And they're like those the Tamest Wiley highly therapies Cuba. The Oh yeah it's like it's ridiculous and I also like I genuinely have never considered anything between us to be like a rivalry whatsoever. I think because of our age difference like we never overlapped in school So there was never any competition between us like for friends or for guys true or anything like that so like I never like. We never went after the same things. Well also everything that I did. She would then do but better so I was like. I was like pretty good at volleyball. And then she was like allstate. We weren't but we weren't like going after the same spot on. You know there was no and like she does stand up like I'm not an jugs rate and like I'm not going for the same roles we're not going for the same jobs eat and so it's really like. I really don't consider there to be any rivalry. Use My first phone call when there's something exciting. Actually she's my only one. Isn't that funny? When you get good news it starts out that you're like you call all your friends over the years. It's like there's just simply. When do you remember when you knew mom was having another baby like? Did you have that memory or when she came home from the hospital? I don't but I do remember being really. She was so adorable that I was threatened and I knew I had to start getting nicer to my dad. You know I was like Oh you did a moment of like. Oh yeah definitely. I had that you know. I'm glad you never had that but I did. Because she was so cute. She was just as little Shirley Temple and I had been. You know you get used to be people thinking you're an adorable little girl and then all of a sudden it's Oh and you're just like the older like you know ogre that's like going through it right now to me. They're just like here. Hold this for your sister. You know But then we we like had a rough start as you know really young kids and then and then we like actually you want to say that the the the note yeah Yeah I guess for for a while for a while there until we were about twenty two. This is young. This is like we're probably four. It was like a Like AB was like not particularly too nice to be. Sometimes I terrorized her one time my mom was like she woke up with a nightmare. And the my mom's like general go sleep with Amy Julie no mirrors about her but hear me out like I watched the exorcist and Linda Blair like her when amy was if I'm like when he was eight Linda Blair and the exorcist it was there was some there was some bang similarities. There's overlap some Abang overlap so I so I like saw this it was close and so I would have seen nightmares and so so aim us a little bit Mutebi and so so one day. I thought it was my fault. You know I guess it was. It was a good abuser. Route was my fault for being so cute and so I wrote amy note like you know. Do you love if you love me you will you draw is on this pig and I drew. I remember I finally do remember opening that note and seeing it and our dad had made a big deal about in the mafia families. All that matters that's like what the lesson he used to teach us all the matters and I remember opening this. Yeah and I look at this little thing and it broke my heart and it completely changed our the rest of our lives and I drew heart is on the pig and they gave it back to her and then we were inseparable for the rest of. And you have that. Yeah well no no generator now. We don't have that one. But but amy did like a callback to it like a couple of years later or whatever like 'cause we would rightly always little like nice little notes love each other each other love what sisters do and we have letters like all throughout high school and college and it's really. Nice like we've sent it back and forth each other and like one as a cat or whatever like I'll always like dries you little dummy you're a dummy but but when we fight so one fight I'm remembering was we. Were leaving comedy clubs together and I had a rolling bag with me. You know like why. I think I was getting changed. Their and a comedy club in a mall. It was okay. I don't WanNa Brag Mall. Great now you know stand up in her jealousy and and and Kim was like I've got it I'll take the bag and she wasn't rolling it and we're walking the car and I keep going like you can roll it like you don't have to lug it. It's a rolling magic. No No. It's fine and I'm like I feel like you're trying to make. It seem more difficult by not just rolling it. She's like I'm fine. It's fine and then we get in the car we go home and our friend Kyle. Who is opening for me? I was like I'm so embarrassed that you saw that like in my mind. That had been a really big. And he's like this. The lamest fight I've ever seen. He was like more mad that we thought that was a fight. My God no. We don't say anything that we'RE GONNA regret. I mean you know stays pretty essays pretty about the thing about being the child of an alcoholic you know. I think also you guys in the way you grew up. I mean you are. You're you know you can't afford to lose each hour ninety and all like if you're a child of an alcoholic you are ready for your whole world. Blow up all the time so we'll get in a fight and like at argument. Nothing and I'll be like well. Obviously we're not talking for a while and she'll be like yes we are. We had a fight about so weird. You're always always like well. That's it obviously. Got My thing like we gotta fight. And she's like I mean I would like it. If at some point you WANNA be a part of genes life. I'm like shut the fuck up shot. Well she tried to make me not go to her wedding and I was like shut up. I'm wanting me who. She was twenty seasons last year and she was projecting her feelings about the relationship. I was in yeah onto what she thought I thought about her husband and they got married in a courthouse in yonkers and I was like her witness and my and the night before it was like. I don't think you like Vinnie and I was. You're an idiot. You are an Abso of course. I love whatever I was like. I'm coming. Don't think this conversation ends. I'm coming here wedding. Our full-time jobs is not letting each other push the other one away. Yeah it's not important. I mean my God at the end of the day and I'm way older than you are. Sisters are getting more important more valuable you know but who who is the most reasonable view. Think neither of us. Oh you crying. Gender sister close girlfriends. They feel like they're still my sister. Cesar. Yeah I'm happy. I have one daughter because I'm surrounded by although now I have two granddaughters and so you know the daughter but it is it. Different Bond is a very different bond. It's a different kind of love. Yeah snugly kind of how? Well she doesn't let me touch her. Oh really like I. I'm Mary affection and I want. I'm aware that wearing her sweater. And I'm upset about it. I don't want to be cold but I don't WanNa be wearing her things. I just WanNa like like you know. Hug Her get away. Are you like that? We've your research. No it's amy specific. It's me really drink after her. I've I've discussed she is. She's report back. Are you still in Chicago? I move back to Connecticut so I'm that ahead hours away. Yeah I believe you've been married for. I've been married for eleven years. Smith isn't that crazy. Yeah to Carmel. Gift dating all that. Yeah did you go to college? Guess ended you go to college. Has We both graduated from college? I went to Grad School. I was a school psychologist and I wouldn't even the acting Meisner two year intensive so when she left for college I was that for for you. Good for years of it was without here like you cannot imagine how bad it went to the most various bad really. Oh Yeah I tanked. Yeah and I could not believe I was going I that I was away. Oh yeah no it. Like Shit went wild. How quickly were you out of the is kind of like? How long did I last house alone without her a year and a half? Yeah a year and a half and then and then I had to be. I came home a lot also and not because she was asking me to come home but I would just come home a lot. Yeah so we could be together and I would like go like visit. I would like not be in school and like it'd be like it's Tuesday not on break like what are you doing here like? Yeah it was real real rough seperation anxiety but you are close you were. She wasn't too far away right. She was in Baltimore. It was absconded. Yeah I was. I was out but you could get there. Yeah I took a train and then. When did you start stand up? When did I become a star? I started stand up when I was like twenty three to school right. He was right after college. Yeah choose probably a wide. I mean thing to do to stand up and be funny. And you know NASA kinetic thing was going to say I'm going to take the leap. Yeah I mean you're friends with a bunch of stand ups you know like they're the most delightful mentally ill people you know. Probably I I was funny like I was a funny kid. And all that you know when you just have a little something that people just laugh with you and I mean no one. Has it more than you go crazy on them? I would be real about it though because you didn't even have to talk. You just stood there and everyone sterile laughing and loving you. But I feel like I had that little thing and then so I try to Improv in. That was not for me. And then one of the girls the Improv troop on the girl. She was like fifty She did stand up and I went to see her. She's really bad and I was like well. I think I could do better than that. I just tried it just delusion and you know you're I stand up experience. Were you with it scary or was it in your mind? Just sort of okay. Let's let's let's see what this says. It was physically scary Yeah it was like you know it wasn't a stage fright of people looking at you but it was okay like you know. Just get up and talk and so I wrote a little set and it wasn't good and but I was likable enough that it went. Okay are you there? I don't know if I was at your I i. I don't know if it was very but you. You say that like a lot that it wasn't very good or whatever or that like you were like not good right away like I think you are so good his. You love me no. I think you're like no one's GONNA say end up right away. You're so funny and like you're like the things that you were talking about. Were funny and like people laughed right away. People get up some people get up and it's crickets like literally like why are you doing? I'm not GonNa you know what? I'M GONNA reliant adverse said you find the funniest one of your friends right right on you. You got up and people were like like they laughed. They like me but I wasn't good but you don't get good at stand up for years. It's not yeah you weren't good at standup. You're funny up there and you had like funny things to talk like I like. I think I think you're selling yourself short now your nose. It was bad I remember one show. I did in central park summer stage. You were there right. That Rehire doors. Yes but like a three to five thousand people and I woke up real ready to just destroy and it was a showcase so I was doing fifteen minutes and I could hear out of those thousands of people. Just my mom laughing. You know so. It wasn't even like I think the I could hear just my mom trying to get everyone to laugh bombed significantly. What happens to you after you bomb? No one will make eye contact with you You know you look to people to be like. Was that as bad as it felt you know and everyone just kind of looks at the floor with amy twice when she's bombed and this was not at the beginning. One is buffalo or was it bombed in Buffalo I bond. We've all bombed Buffalo. Was that country hundred. Oh this was the first time our dad ever GonNa see you alive. Because he's like in a wheelchair can't always I have seen I have seen amy like Duh at like sold out arena like people crying laughing just like like a stadium erupting and laughter. And nothing compares to the feeling of elation. I feel what amy has. Just just tangles come fully need people who are just like no none of the Lord gives me all. She has me on stage when she knows she's bombing and we're we're dying laughing of and Kim. Him always goes like this. She dances to the side. I look over her and she's going like this where I just like. What are you GONNA do? You gotta stay out there. There's also it's not her fault she's not doing like there's nothing you can do about it but I mean the funniest evening you know. I'm going to have a nice evening no matter it's going to be fine but just in that moment where I know. She's got another two minutes. Oh yeah those minutes go by but if I if you see your friend try new joke and it just bombs so. There's nothing funnier exactly. I'll our friend Kyle. Who Yeah we have made him do this. One Joke. That we know is going to bomb convincingly. Well it's so fun you have to do. Please you have to do it? He's but it never gets really crowded. Trussell go you had. It was the crowd like you and he'll get on stage at the joke. No and it ruins the set and he'll look over to us. O be like yeah. We're like best fields. Thank you know the one thing I have to say about comedians and particularly stand up. But you know that moves into acting as well whatever is that. There's a lot of tragedy and sadness in their life. Oh yeah and it ripped part of what makes us survive is how we laughed at certain stuff that literally other people would look at and go. How did you get through it right? Well because we have some weird sense of humor yeah about life yet. It's always been there. But that's why I sent like with all the stuff from our childhood truly like looking back it's never like I never remember us like collapsing into each other in sorrow. It's always it's always like how we are just like. Yikes not you know. But that's the darkest yes that's so you're so lucky to have that because it's even like what you're saying like you're up there bombing you're laughing your ass. You're getting me through it. And she's an and the reality is like okay. Like we've been through so much Ashley. There were times I've been doing. Stand up for fifteen years and my first there were just some an a heckler economy and I would go. I think you have seen me to stand up. I feel like I lose it at a heckler today. Did anything happen? Okay no but you know other people that the professional thing that's nice for the audience is to say something that gets a laugh and move on but it triggers me. It has triggered me in a way where I'm like. What the you know that it just gets ugly. Have you gone out someone to the point where your help bad later? Have you ever seen me like I mean? I don't I wouldn't say you'd feel bad later. I think I wouldn't qualify a couple times. I felt bad later. Yeah I don't think you should. I think they should shut right on the fuck. I remember that show in Chicago. And that girl Tatiana. It's not the time and nights are all ya thing all the time girls in the front row in Chicago tally. Get Out of edge. She was it was toward end. The show had been a really good show and the audience is happy. And I feel good and this girl I think just got real drunk by the end was like like yelling for me to like. Show a boo yes or my vagina or something. Like she's like like it was just really am Dr and I tried to get her to quiet and she wouldn't and I was like one time you saw your dad. Oh My oh yeah. Oh yeah I mean I went? I'd hard and I love that awesome. That sounds great beds light. We're Chris Dr. Ruth. I know says Chris. Rock has quote. He's like if ignorance is bliss. Then what's the opposite of that? It's you know comic see or performance. You see everything. It's our job to read other people and so that's it's the opposite of bliss. It's kind of a hell but God I haven't heard that quote. Oh the best like dramatic performances that I've seen recently have been by like people who are typically like comedic actors and I just think that it's like that like kind of like what we were talking about. How like Comedians and and people who are really funny have this way of handling dark things and kind of perceiving darkness and doing something with that that I think translates to drama in such a distinct and clear and beautiful way. The best comics are really vulnerable yet. Really kind of get to the crux of things. And that's why I think that you know like Odin kirks performance better call Saul. I'm just like I'm blown away by it so much and like he's so funny and I just I really liked this trend of seeing these really comedic. People being cast in these dramatic roles. And I think it's like such an exciting thing. It's the other side of comedy. Yeah and we possess the darkness. You know you know. I've gone out there and I've been funny most of my life even though my mother didn't think I was funny. But that's why not that funny but you know Mike. My favorite author favorite poets my favorite thing or dark. We'll go for instance You know and I just much more attracted to that sort of the underworld what what really is going on. Where does pain come from and it is? It is why it's like it's like the clown you know it's like the gestures Justice Court justice. No everything Oh my God I know. I personally think that it's much harder to be funny than it is to be. Oh my God I mean I. It's much funnier. And by the way when Amy Schumer cries so do we same with all all you hoes. I mean seriously thirty one week Ryan you with us but but you know in a movie like I told you this before but how to lose a guy in ten days like that is such a classic amazing comedy that I feel like I have taken so much from And like I don't know it's like a classic it's like A. It was on the other day when I was getting my nails. Done Brag Nielsen. Everyone is just like everyone loves that. Movie and Hilarious. It's hilarious also heartbreaking in feel good and it's relatable yeah. I mean I love that movie I I love it too. I love making that movie. Yeah it was also really fun because that was one of those movies where we wrote every you hide your set pieces but I really like in order for them to come to life. There was a lot at living in everything that I know everything was doing was wasn't written all. Tell a set me up for the best. My favorite kind of stuff which is just like going you know improperly it was also kind of revolutionary because it was like you know. I just felt like as women. We were just all supposed to like you. You want to try to get a guy and Do a good job and don't be too loud and don't be be pretty whatever that's just like what it felt like society was telling us to do and then it just vote. Kinda revolutionary to see a woman like breaking all the rules like. I'M GONNA go so far into that lane you know just because I'm because we're just as smart as you or smarter. Yeah that makes me feel. Oh my God. How often do you guys talk a day? Probably every day especially every every day sometimes for a couple of days but we talk a lot depending on like sometimes like there's a lot going on are like who like I call. It was like can I complain for like thirty minutes. And she's like definitely clear. Yeah and then also we have an APP called Polo bar rope. Oh yeah which is which is just so good because sometimes you know like like maybe like a little video like enough to say to have a full like conversation or whatever but it's just like quick things or whatever where like I need her to see like issues like I got a new plant that she needs me to see and I need to go to. I'm I guess it's always keeping in touch. This is what I like is like a beautiful part of our sisterhood. A couple years ago I called her at like five PM. And I complained about some. You know some Shit for like twenty minutes. It's five PM and she goes. It's my birthday this. This is okay. It's my favorite my favorite conversation. Okay is five. It is five twenty two. We talked for such a long time. She's just like talking time. Like only like totally and she's like going wherever what what else is going on. What are you doing tonight and I went? Well it's my birthday so and then go jiving we laugh. That's you know and it's like an and you see you see movies and shows whatever where it's like that would like caused fight or something right but that's also not our language of love. We're not like gifts are not who. What is your language of low? I love this acts of God. I did not know how you were. GonNa Finish Service your your number one access services. Probably Number One. I don't know and that's my husband's number one to all my God. It's so funny because you don't know what this is at all. Oh okay you like figure out your love language like sort of how you express. I love words of affirmation but Chris doesn't. My husband doesn't care. Complicate does nothing for him. So I'll be like you're such a great husband. I'm lucky I feel lucky every day. I love you so much. You're such a good dad and he's like can you turn the lights off. He doesn't care he doesn't. It does nothing for him. Yeah I hear that and I don't have to see you for a week. Yeah Hymns is physical touch. No no that was an active. He's GonNa burn this. Will you tell the story about how you got started working together? Oh my God yes so I was. I was I was working as a school psychologist in Chicago and Amy Heads Choose very good at. It is very nice. Yes as an act like an act of the out there. I know And And Amy had just like Comey central adjusts. Like when like your you know giving her a TV show and she called me and she was like I want you to come in right for the TV show. And I was like no. It was like I'm busy hockey new as I'm not GonNa do that 'cause like I just started a new school in new job. Whatever is like if you get picked up for a second season I'll I'll come to. You never thought that would happen. Was every evening except for a year. Those are words of affirmation early laughing. Good luck you're coming. Yeah I was. I was fully bluffing. I was like you know like catchy. Back at waiting tables and then it's kind of like when she got picked for a second season I could hear it in her voice like I need. And she's like guess what and she called me. I think she actually said guess. What bitch and She was like I got picked up and I was like yeah okay and so I went into ask for a sabbatical because I was like okay. I will come for to write the show with you for six months and then I'm going back to my life as a school psychologist in Chicago and so I asked you thought I was going to make it six more months in the business six. We'll know 'cause I just I was coming at. You know like I was Gonna say go you know and so I asked for a sabbatical And and my principal was like yeah. I'm sure the school board we find without like you know you're you're great. We love you here and the school board was like no one is like oh. I guess I quit. And they're like Oh and so I quit. You Know Pencil I quit. Yeah and so I had to like but you know like when really it wasn't like this was a career change at all. It was like I am going to just like go and like try this thing so I like talked to my husband and it was. It wasn't like we're moving to New York. I was like I'm GonNa go do the same for six months like you stay here in like work and be with the dog and all like fly home every other weekend for websites to be six young runner. J. Jill's apartment. Yeah back and anything weird inside of his. We tried up place. There's one we got a phone call about like shoes. One day there was no evidence of him. Do Yeah we we we. All that was left was a frozen birthday cake. Which when I would get drunk. I would not this eventually video where I was pretending like. I was at the Party where the cake had been his. Jake do something. Yeah Yeah but we had a great and we went we went to. Barry's bootcamp never been bootcamp. Mary Lane I feel like it might be kind of fun. It's good if you're young and you've never experienced trauma. Yeah but no. It's I mean depending on like my body if I did it I would need to be fully taken out a stretch. It was it was great. That's cool artists is fun. It's it's word and then you feel you feel great. Yeah Yeah Okay. So you shopped with our instructor. Well then it was awesome. I want not only don't take that out. I want that twice. Can you do you play it and play it again? Lucky Girl Lee's I'm proud clean. Started working like it was kind of like we realized that like. Oh you're actually doing this and I was like like good and I was going to be there for the writing and then it was like oh like I should also be here for one. We're shooting this. Because that would be good too and then it was gonna be like right from their. Who's GonNa go and start working on trainwreck? And she was like hey like also like come and do this as well and idiots living in l. a. and then so those apartments called the OAKWOODS shooman folks. This is what we're GONNA do. I call you. Hey and then. They gave him a fucking sabbatical. Gave you a Sabbatical? And so so he and my dog and we all went to La and and then that was a now. You're here in Connecticut. Yeah Yeah Fun and it'll be back. I'm so happy to be back. Oh my God it's been so nice because I I come here. I'm here probably like once a month on average more. Yeah it's been it's been so at that close. Proximity Gene. Gene was born. I was I was here. Whatever and then because he wasn't going to be here to the next week okay next week and I went home and then Eimi call and was like hey actually and I was like okay and I came back in Chicago. That couldn't have happened. You know. It's just it's so nice being this close love you run by each other pretty much. No no no not really. It's it's nice we were. We do run a lot. I read a lot of. Is this behavior. I did unacceptable. Yeah Yeah you know. I'll say you know what we that's what we do each other. We go like was I wrong. It's a lot of was and she will. Most of the time say you were for significant for semantic for Sigmatic the mushroom. Coffee the coffee that I've been using for a couple years now. Even prior to doing a podcast is the good shit. It's the Good Shit I love. It tastes so good so you know and don't let the mushroom part throw you off by the way no so great well. The Mo- mushrooms are so great for you so it's lion's mane which is not actual lion's Mane but It will make you feel as if you can grow a lion's Mane and then be King of the jungle that basically you drink a cup of coffee you know and feel like you have a lion's mane on your back lions great for cognitive. It's supports focus clarity. There's no jitters. You know it's very smooth to smooth acceleration into your day. I like a French press coffee personally. 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And you're thinking about parenting or after having the baby after having gene go you know. I'm GonNa do something very differently than how I was raised does that. Is that an active thought. Fria yeah inactive. Thought for me is I'm like I've never I haven't yet like spent the night away from him And I have a hard time leaving and even to for a couple of hours for work or just leaving the room you know that guilt and the shame and the and I have been teaching myself like. You're not that important. Just a mom is very important. But it's like don't make him. Don't make yourself this important to him in your mind. And don't you know I still want to be president and be a great mom but I don't Wanna I don't want I don't WanNa make myself his life. You don't really say things like Momma loves you or stuff like that like you. Don't really put yourself in sentences about him or whatever it's more like you like. What do you want what do you? What are you doing and everything you don't really make it. Which like now. I just want him to be his own. But I have the same thing. I mean with Ryder. I didn't leave until he was two almost two and a half for the first time I mean I had a full on as you want them to feel so here and it was my own and and he I mean it was obviously great for him to have that kind of attachment knife went everywhere with him. I didn't lead securite right. Studies have shown that as a child who has secured. Achmet does very well in life. Yeah Children Bet. Don't their trajectory is not very good. Yeah and then there's the other level well then there's a different thing then there's Munchausen yes between between you know zero and like two two and a half years old. Yes when that. That's when and it doesn't have to be a mom it can any that's new caregivers to like the learning of like you know. He loves his nanny. Gene and gene loves him so much. The sounds like I'm doing Tarzan and Jane you gene but and to not feel weird about that because he loves me too you know. I want him to Love Them. I yes and you want him. You know what love is because that's really important that I know that there's a lot of gals who will have babies and they become jealous of their nanny and then the baby wants to nanny and doesn't want the mommy remember thinking. That child is learning how to love. Yeah John As many label as this kid my babies can love yes. The greatest thing ever was fearlessly love. Yeah you know and I never felt like that because you always know the child is always GonNa Love You. Unfortunately no matter what shake him right you know like they would feel better if you were there all the time but it just means you're it's not about me. I I also try to remind people to. It's a funny thing because when people go. Oh you've you know nannies or help you every I I always say. People don't realize that we weren't supposed to do this on our own. Yeah like we were. We were all in a teepee together. Raising each other's children work. We had to work. We had to farm. We had to everybody chipped in for survivor. Always always helping each other with our church with childbearing went was what we did. It was like the elephant for some reason. Now One woman one woman is supposed to be everything to all the children and it's impacted impossible thinned. Impossible you're asking. The impossible of it goes against based inked was there like a time in consumerism. Where there was that woman that I mean. It's it's such a lie I mean I I don't I mean it had to be. I mean I'm sure well I remember. I just film swing shift right. Yeah and that movie was all about what happened during the Second World War. Well with these women and we all went in and it was rosie the riveter and they became they got jobs right and they suddenly became sort of actualized and in many ways sexualize and ways that they could fix their own toaster and they became independent and what was interesting about. The notion of the movie is is that they had all the propaganda about the end of the movie which had shows have new dishwashers washing machines and they brought women back into the kitchen they bring back in and this was sort of the theme of the movie theme of managing and know exactly so it was like lowering them back into that world of service and not any the self us. A SPARK. Lovely lovely little apron. Look different but we're only just coming out of the that now. I feel like these last couple of years where everybody's eyes are really open to how insane we got used to being. Yoyo. Yeah how everybody felt like it was okay. I it's really well. I have to say to when you came on the scene and things that you were talking about and I remember the Oh okay so this is going to change the dialogue of how women talk about themselves and I think you had a huge huge part in that because you're the first woman to be accepted who really came out and was like you know what I'm going to actually just talk about how it really is a woman and and I think John was in there somewhere. Vagina was what I need to throw it back to you and say that. I think that I was really inspired by a lot of your work. Like just. That's the truth it's would know. Eli Stated Complement. And and you know you weren't at all in any way an influence So I'm sorry about that. No but I mean that's really cool because that's exactly how I feel but you did make it okay for a lot of women to feel like oh. I can be more truthful. A human. Yeah Yeah acidy of yeah trying to be treated like gosh the audacity of just deciding that you wanted to make a movie then you had to figure out how to be the leader and I want to produce yeah reduce. Yeah just because was a double edged sword. He's women yesterday. Just you know this is where it's like but these women are from this They're you know they grow tomatoes. They harvest the tomatoes in Florida. They are like this the Moccoli coalition this tribe and these women from from Guatemala. I like what if I was like the person who tried to say it right? From what the Ma like? I just hit it hard anyway. And you're like Oh but anyway. They're these farm workers and they make about thirteen grand a year. You know and they fought in eighty percent of these workers got assaulted in the fields. It's actually called field. Starting fourteen years old anyway. They got together and they came up with the fair food act. So just there's oversight and so you can you know and so the tomatoes on this burgers that you get from McDonald's or Burger King or all these places signed on for the Fair Food Act so you know that those workers are protected and then there's some places like Wendy's or Publix or Kroger's that early we're not signing onto that but like these women band together and made this change you know and and just seeing another woman act like a human and demand to be treated just like bare minimum a human. It really inspires other people to to do that and I felt that from you guys. You know hearing that you guys felt it for me. It's cool. I think it's the dialogue. Everything is happening. But they're still. Is this little part of me that every time I walk into a row. You know it's a it's a little bit like don't don't now just be this one thing right and you're like. I'm not trying to be rude but I created all these jobs. I mean you are essentially a job creator right. I be doing like an arena. I'm about to do you know where the basketball teams play and the people backstage it would not guard message where garden baby. And it's like Oh do you you you need this you you complain about the music not loud enough or whatever I'm like. Yeah yes I am. These people are here. Because I'm here you know it's Kinda why you treat the guys. I sometimes sit very quietly and I watch some of my male peers. Do certain things and I I do clock them like if I did that were that that would ever go over. It would be if you believe criticized. Eli had happened anyway. Not Saying it doesn't even occur to them like there's not a moment before they say something that they're like should I may be not like there's no. There's no yeah now there's little doubt that's what is so fascinating to me that they're not like should I? It's just like thought here it is. That's why I love beyond say documentary or Nicki Menaj or just or Taylor's whatever there's those moments where you see them stand up for themselves and it's like oh it's a little alarming to see. I know but it's also like can you believe actually how like it's been a sad as it has well by the way you've been here. E millennial generation. Yeah it's We like to think that the needle has moved. Yeah but very slowly. Yeah I mean it's just the way it is you know every single day. Yeah and parts and wealthy interrelationship. Yeah that's another one which is like you wanna feel like a girl. You WanNa be sexy. You WanNa be this and that you want to figure out how to make it all right and it's very tough to be really successful and in the world and hold a relationship there for you. It's like you're the epitome of adorable and bubbly and giggly and must've been so hard for people to also accept you as as a smart skew. Business really even if I if I laugh at all in a meeting deterrent. I go right back to zero. Yeah airhead make a choice person. Exactly yeah I figured if I walked in showing my teeth I wouldn't be upset. See I never got raised so I would have the like. See The bottom here like no I would have the very intimidating bottom row. Rs sponsor is locks. Okay if isis sisters who want to work together. Oh do it. That's it goodbye. Okay do it do it? One word to describe the other one word fat other. Oh sorry Less fat no hilarious. Funny us who's better at following rules me Kim. One word to describe each other at twelve who text the other more knee. Maybe you tax more. I call more favorite book her Harry Potter Your Favorite Book TV. Yeah I love it. Have you ever seen? It turned a few pages on television. Who's an easier person to make laugh? Oh you're probably me yeah really good laugher. Moms easiest to make laugh for US really. Yeah then I I'm second I think yeah. I bet rely who can come up with a better. Punchline Amy Him we closer on our TV show because she would always think of the closing punch line which is the hardest. Oh that's true and I'm just good at like little like you'll have like you're reading a book. That's funny. Isn't it interesting though because the punch line is just to look? Yeah and that's those are the best. Yeah so calm. Who is more likely to suggest taking a photo me? Oh Yeah Yeah. Yeah well I was going to say we don't really we both like proof of life if we're being nice moment like we don't want it to end it's like seventy take a picture. This later most disagreed on topic disagreed on topic. I don't know what that means. Like like travelling like. What do you guys disagree? I would say like we're doing things activities. Yes she thinks that I should teach. Our dog had to go to the bathroom outside. I have I have. I have been pretty firm on that and I just don't see that for her see that for her and by the looks she doesn't. She's not no she. Doesn't she plans. I had a little one too and I think it's also just too lazy parent because I had a lot of pe- pads I was like no. She's fine she's pretty heads all over great. If if the whole were followed were taken as a suggestion. Rugs are a new pee pee pads just rug right. Close my bedroom door here. Yeah who has a better poker face? Amy What Poker Me. But in life amy in life meet me. But she's actually at actor poker as an actual better poker face if they had to eat one fast food forever. What would it be nothing? We're just both GOING PASTA. Both just yeah. We would skip the fast food. This is fun. This is so fun one thing you can do. Your sister can't Mega Man Orgasm. Haven't I've been I read a book? No dancing I can do. I can open a bottle of wine. Yeah like a cocktail. Yeah can function in society. Now what can you do that? I can't you can. Yeah I have. I have better long You've really good memory memory. I she tested my Iq on yeah. What a school psychologist. And I tested in some categories as a true genius. Yeah and then in some categories as if I Bowling no offence to anyone. But like as if I a down syndrome. But he's not a big. That's the number it was number. You're you're my word recognition like if I read if I read a list of words I'll have full confidence but I'll read them wrong. Aso Your short term memory. My memory is good. Your long term memory is great but her ability to attend and focus on something is like almost nominee and so. That's something that I can do. Really she has to go. Yeah who gives better relationship advice? Probably you probably me career advice. I think it's it's just it's different you know. We both have such like narrow. We're both not good at navigating the business now we just both like writing whatever. Yeah we're both like we could both use the lesson. Yeah yeah but I mean we're not so we got a lot of people a lot of the business in la it's like people pretending to give notes or something super fucking idiots and walk out. Yeah and then they only not just straight. Yeah then they destroy you my favorite note. I ever got on a movie was I. Just don't like bows and I went. I can't change that. You mean like boat like little you know like bows on clothes. She didn't like how did they get any about you? Pass cow play that twice. Play that one twice. If you could do another job what would it be tug book happen? Oh you'd be great at that. I trained for a little while driving. I like to do that. I'll do that with you. I talk about your help. People talk about like no bit like shots kind of talk about. That's incredible one like that's really cool harm. That's been bad. I'll just do that okay. You're going to be able to talk. I'll yell help out on the boat. Okay so our last question is always a two part question and and each purse each we ask. What is it about your sister? That is something a characteristic that you wish that you had more of in your life. And then what is one characteristic that you kind of wish or or sort of anxiety or something that you wish you could alleviate from your sister because you knew it would be good for her. Amy Is the the bravest most straightforward person I know and I think that that would. It's almost like there's something just so unquestionable about how she lives her life that I think would alleviate such anxiety in mind like she if there's something if there's some injustice going on there's not even a question if it's going to be addressed like there's no should. I shouldn't I address it or take care of it like we were on our way home yesterday from something and there were there was like two guys on the street about to get in a fight and like she didn't like check in with me about this or anything like this. She went and rolled the window down. Cops ARE COMING. The police are coming. You know an immediately just like like got because like a delivery guy was being yelled at and it wasn't even a thought like should I enter Jackson? I interested if she sees something. That's not right. Nothing else fucking matter. She's going to address it and do whatever she can to fix. It and I wish that I had that Like all like I could like. I'll probably eventually arrive at some semblance of like the brave thing to do but like it's not it's just it's just part of her and I have always always has been and I've just respected that so much and I wish that I had that Bravery of myself And the thing that I would like alleviate from her I know I have to think about that I don't know I think for for Hotak. Well I'll start with what I would alleviate which is Is Holding onto some anger. You know what I mean like I feel like I'm better at like getting rid of my anger. Yeah then You know yeah like just that would alleviate like just a place for you to put your deserved deserved anger And what I would love to have a possess that Kim possesses is Like I don't know she. Has this cool shirt. I really like. It's probably your shirt from you. Know She has a real capacity to love and enjoy people like she doesn't love a lot of people you know. She doesn't let a lot of people get close to her. But if you are one of the few people that she knows she loves It's like you feel like you're you're safe and you're going to you'll be okay no matter what And she has like made me understand that that we have each other for life in a way because of you know being a little older than her experiencing our parents like. It's pretty incredible that I can even have that And Yeah she's just really selective and like we can love endlessly in a way that I wish I could more anyway will if you should choose to forego your room and come to the bachelor suite with me. It's so don't tell us what happened. Were stole thing is actually like a bizarre twist on the anger. Oh Oh my God you which would get more. I think you should cut the people out of your life. Who aren't fucking totally. Great good to you and who don't only bring you good positive thing find Goldie yet right at that really is that really is really is just in. That's I think that's actually great certain people anyway. I should keep letting it happen. Yeah I've cut some out. Allow a gene was born. But and I'd and I'd like to be a wonderful I. I have moments in my life where I'm like I do. I think about that all the time I'm like. Why am I still in this? Yeah I waiting what am I? What is it when people show you who they are? Believe them believe them I love you guys. Love you guys. This was so oliver. Has the flu Oliver for your influence. A even though and grateful that he's okay but thank you for doing a sibling. Revelry is executive bruce by Kate Hudson Oliver Hudson and SIM sarnoff supervising producer. Alison present editor. Is Josh Windisch Music? Mark Hudson Aka uncle.