Listen: Dr. Fred Luskin - Why Holding Grudges is Bad for your Health and How to Forgive for Good
"In preventative cardiology not at the Stanford University School of Medicine. He shares that you don't actually have to forget in order to forgive or even skip the grieving step for that matter better but you may have to change the story around what happened. It's good stuff for those of us. Who might hold a grudge or two now? Here's Doctor Lufkin and Dr Fred Lesquin. It's so great to have you on untangled today. Thank you for being here. You're welcome. Were you inspired by a personal motivation to forgive something something big in your life. How did you even get interested in forgiveness as a as a project in a more personal sense there were two two interests that converged one was? I have had a meditation practice since college. So for me. That's quite a long time ago about forty. The year's almost at form the good part of my life and so I wanted to do a dissertation study on something related needed to one of the spiritual qualities and virtues the forgiveness I chose that impart because I had been very very badly hurt by a close friends a few years before then and had struggles like crazy to get over it. I mean struggled doesn't even even though I couldn't get over it was a much better way of putting it and I was just miserable. I was a licensed therapist. Ask and none of us. Therapy stuff did me any good and the only hope was my wife like said you know Fred you gotta do something this. This is like ridiculous so that not me. Somehow I stumbled upon the idea or right on. I just forgive this guy and it made a difference breads and what I took was some of the strategies that I use to forgive that person and turn them into the stuff that form. The cornerstone quarter started the forgiveness project. Well interesting they know you did quite a bit of Research Rouser dissertation and even since then forgiveness says it is one of those under utilized misunderstood qualities that appears to be really good for human beings. There hasn't been that much research but almost way ever research there is has been positive. It's an indication that the stress caress of not letting go."