What Do I Do When My Friends Talk About Dieting?
Alright. SO WE DO A. As promised. A we showed. Okay. I will read it. Man. Hey, Sammy any lean first off like every other email you read I, want to say how much I love your podcast and I. Thank you for sharing. Your intuitive eating. Journey is really opened my eyes and helped me a lot. I was deep engraved in Dia, culture for a very long time. Last November I competed in my first bodybuilding Bikini show and struggled so much post show with binge eating I continued to. Stick with the coach for almost a year after my competition trying to follow a strict workout, a meal plan and kept finding myself struggling so much with my relationship with food binging and body image. So I dropped the coach and I've recently been my own intuitive eating journey for a couple of months now, and I really couldn't be happier. However, what I am struggling with is the triggering language that a few of. My friends and family members use when it comes to their body slash eating habits. A few of my very close family friends are actually signed up with my previous coach and in deep quote diets, they're constantly justifying their food explanations to me or making comments about how they feel or look fat, etc. This is very triggering for me and makes me question my own food choices and body they know I am on. An into they know I'm on an intuitive eating journey and I post a lot about it on social media. So there's no surprise to them. However, I'm not sure how to handle these comments in person when they're made I, try my best to brush them off in reply with neutral responses but I'm finding very hard and it makes me question myself. How would you guys handle this thing so much your fellow intuitive eater. Yeah I mean, this is this is like this. This is the Pitta me of the challenge of of sort of going your own way with intuitive eating. I I think. It's like with anything like even even diets even eating anything you do is easy in a vacuum but. Released into the wild everything becomes more challenging because there's so many variables. Well, I'll just say that's Why I brought up the like ten thousand steps thing from this weekend like I found that that whole conversation to be dark triggering because like not because there's anything wrong with that. But because when I was dieting ten, thousand steps was like thing I had in my head as like. That's a method of losing weight not a method of like getting my body moving. So the intensity of like we need to move, we need to take as many steps like I was not like. It gave being Zaidi and let people were taking it too far. We're like I need to go walk around but yeah. Yeah. Right, it's like that and there's nothing like I'm not like again it's not about like the family or the friends who are doing this like like you know what I mean. It's all their fault. It's just more like. Necessarily bad and no, it's not. It's not like inherently bad at all and like it's it's not you can't blame them even but the like. You have your own feelings about it, and that's understandable and that's okay because of where you are on your journey and the whole thing I guess becomes about like. How do you internalize those messages without letting them? Without. And take them in sort of without. Letting them, derail you or examining them like non-judgmental Lee. About how they make you feel. and. It's OK that a certain message or a certain situation might make you feel certain in a certain time. It doesn't mean forever. It doesn't mean those things are inherently bad. It just means right now you're experiencing a certain emotion. So what like? I'll give my own example at the ten thousand steps like I felt like, okay I'm experiencing this. Let me observe it. Why is it making me feel this way like what? It triggering. Hate using that word but like what is it bringing up for me? What brought up for me was like a wet a certain old way of thinking and certain environments might bring that up for you or certain people might turn talking to certain people might bring that up for you and it's not those people's fall. It's it's. It's just something for you to grapple with and like like Ailey like you said like if it is easy in a vacuum when you don't have those like things coming up but when you do figuring out how to like. SORT. Of handle them internally is the process and that's okay that sometimes you will feel bad feeling bad is like feeling bad internally is not necessarily. A bad thing. It's just an emotion toe sorta bride I think just to add also on that there's two things you can like practically do and what I do. Is. Have on hand like a list of reasons why doing intuitive eating put make in a notes in your phone write it down some writing things is more I know just feels different than typing it because typing could be deleted but writing it feels more therapeutic and more natural. I don't know what it is just love handwritten note. Writing like why you're doing this, what your goals are with this? Like how do you want to feel and then anytime you feel like somebody says some comment that you're not necessarily feel strong enough for just go back to that list. And read it to yourself sort of like an affirmation. But also we get a reminder of why you're doing what you're doing. It doesn't make you weak at all to have to go back. And my other thing is just maybe take perspective of like. What the the comments that they make is from a different mindset. It's an old mindset that you don't want to assume it's something it's something you're trying to get rid of, and that doesn't make you better than anybody. It just makes you in a different place and just remind yourself like, oh, they're just in a different place than I am And I'm a new place and just kind of. Again like like you're saying, don't engage handle it neutrally like you're saying but it definitely very difficult. So what you can do the things that you can control so I think I would try to take those tools with you. Into these situations.